#and they gave her their clothes too……the silly red hoodie and sweater …

[soullessjack]

has anybody thought about jack and kaia lately . Is it just me

[pinyatapix]

i never played Concord nor had interest in it but i felt an insatiable drive to redesign all of its characters before the game shut down ever since i saw how absolutely dripless they were

anyways here’s my scuffed ass sketches of the gang. i was originally going to finish these all before the game’s shutdown but i was so stuck on Teo that it took 6 extra days rip me. also i cant draw guns. these are all first drafts so expect them to change a bit if i feel like drawing em again

more info on these designs below (warning i yap a lot)

Itzi (i am not calling her “It-Z” cuz it reads rly weird and i can imagine someone bri’ish calling her “It-Zed” it’s so dumb): Wanted to make her more of a goofy lil gremlin creature, like some combo between a jerboa chameleon and raptor, to make her more appealing and interesting, imagine being shot to death by this silly little scamp. Everyone loves Ivy Deadlock for her gremlin charm so maybe they’d love Itzi too if she had that as well. Her chest has a hole in it containing the weird ball she throws to teleport and shit, because a Concord critique by TBSkyen said that a character’s powers should appear on their physical design or whatever, also to show that she got mutated in a freaky space storm

Bazz: nothing about her reads as “agile deadly knife-throwing assassin”, especially with that annoying puffy bright red coat, she looks completely stupid running around doing backflips with that thing on! So i made it a more sharper mysterious black coat she wears like a cape to give her that sense of shadowy agility like a phantom thief, which she keeps all her carbon steel knives all neatly stored in. Gave her a slight diamond motif on the coat and the glasses because it felt elegant and sharp. Thought her hairstyle kinda fucked hard so i kept it but made it a bit more pointier and added a little stylish side swoop.

Lennox: i actually love this guy’s voice acting and the slightly manic goofy personality it had but his design did NOT fit the voice, so fuck it im making him even more of a lizard man than they were trying to do. His self-healing ability is him shedding a bit of skin after it took damage, and his “splodey knife” is probably a back scale spine he yoinks out of his back that can explode because it’s a biological property of his species for some reason. I do not know what clothes to give him

Lark: Discarded all semblance of a humanoid silhouette to make them even more of a weird mushroomy alien. I don’t really have much to say but i can easily see them slithering around like an octopus on land but faster. Their gun would look way more like some organic fungal creation

Haymar: not much changes here but i wanted to make her more mystic and “wizardy”. The “fireballs” she uses as her main ammo are now a floating bead necklace rotating around her neck (kinda like that zen robot from overwatch) and her clothes now have more of a slight flame motif, along with more of a mystic vibe. Got rid of those ugly ass mustard sneakers too of course

Daw: gave him more turtle motifs to match his “turtle-esque” gameplay style by giving him a protective hoodie and turning his “healing pad” pack into a bulky turtleshell backpack (he’s also wearing a turtleneck sweater shirt underneath the coat lol). His coat is somewhat translucent like shiny plastic cuz i thought it would look neat, tried to ditch the goofy-ass jumpsuit thing he had by giving him a belt to separate shirt and pants. Not too sure if i made him appear enough as a medic as that’s his main thing, the coat and gloves could probably help but idk, but i adjusted his personality presentation to be more easygoing and warmhearted with the closed-eyes so maybe that could give a healer energy.

Duchess: old ladies who know how to kick ass are rly cool. her whole thing’s making walls and constructs out of this golden gooey energy but nothing in her design tells you about that, so i decided to give her a cape/cloak made of that same golden essence so that it’s more apparent on what she can use it for, it also makes her appear more like royalty which was prolly what they were going for. Kept the haircut cuz that beehive thing was very goofy but it fits the vibe of everything else

Roka: she looked like a blowup sexdoll version of Master Chief which is… very cursed, and it tells nothing about her being able to fly around and stomp on people, so i made her bug themed! She’s like a cross between a wasp and dragonfly, the bulletproof wings are rocket-powered and can fully rotate the other direction to give her a forward boost of momentum to stomp people with her slightly more exaggerated boots, they also neatly fold away when she’s not flying. She’s rockin’ that tokusatsu hero look, it gives her a lot more energy to her personality.

Daveers: hated drawing them and i feel unsatisfied but i do like what ideas i had for them. Gave them more of a “sketchy mad scientist” vibe and personality with a shit-eating grin and all that, also tried to give them a “test tube contraption” thing going on by having their helmet be entirely glass and there being tubes and bottles all over their baggy jumpsuit full of poisons and chemicals. Gave them a spray-can backpack that stores all their toxic sludge tho im not too sure if it fits the rest of them or not… whatever. Tried giving them a chemical burn mark on one half of their face but it’s blending in with the hair rip

Jabali: he’s a healer whose powers come from “his own pulse”, but the weird pacemaker thing on his heart is the only way of knowing that so i made him waaaayyy more heart themed! His cool-ass hat’s got a blood cell design on it, his coat’s got a vein pattern, his shoulder pads look like aortas and arteries, i think his dreadlock ponytail could also match the aorta look. I seriously felt that vibe of the cool badass black guy with the glasses and coat and wide tippable hat needed to be enhanced even more, he had all the ingredients to be one stylish mfer but they weren’t mixed in properly, depressing.

Vale: i was racking my head on what to do with her because the only thing going on with her was “sniper” and “bionic legs”, but i decided to make her a “scrapper” like what they called Emari in that one short by turning that “burlap sack hobo” look she originally had into more of a defining feature as something recycled from a bunch of scrap she collected. Turned her “how do you do fellow kids” backwards hat into a slick bandana that has her sniper goggles attached to it, made her braids/dreadlocks into a cool ponytail befitting of a sniper though i wished i decorated them with more stuff other than the power plugs at some of their tips, like nuts and bolts acting as hair beads. Her bionic legs are also more heavily emphasized here, she’s like 70% leg like Byakuya Togami Danganronpa and that makes her a bit more taller than most, i can see her running around with them rly fast also they have large springs in them for extra jump (also they matched those spring like curly tips in her og hairstyle)

Emari: tried to make her bulky armor even more like it’s made of scrap like the “scrapper” she is, tho since i kinda suck at mechanical greebling she looks very cluttered and hard to read. I tried putting cute little stickers and graffiti on her armor to give her more of a fun-loving vibe despite her imposing build, felt like she’d decorate her armor for fun. Gave her helmet a visor to give her some cool toughness and added lil things on it reminiscent of bear ears cuz her silhouette needed a lil something. Problem i have with drawing her is that her silhouette ended up looking too similar to 1-0FF’s redesign, it really needs some fixing cuz it’s pretty damn rough.

Kyps: she could’ve served so much cunt but she didn’t, so i needed to change that. To match her invisibility powers as a spy i themed her off of chameleons and mirrors — i un-balded her for improved silhouette by giving her a hairstyle similar to a chameleon tail (tho it also looks like a glass Prince Rupert’s drop and mirrors are also glass), gave her “earrings” similar to mirror handles, made her coat a lot longer and have it slightly reminiscent of fractured or cut glass, give it a coattail like a chameleon tail, and tried giving faint patterns on the clothes and especially the tied that gives a sort of “shimmery” kinda vibe??? She’s reminding me a lot of Inteleon right now

1-0FF: actually my favorite out of the redesigns, he was so tricky to do but i think i got him pretty right. Wanted him to appear even more of a friendly recycling bot toughened up by constant battle, replaced that menacing eye of his with a friendly smile on a screen (that i took from an app icon from my ipad out of laziness lol) and gave him little symbols of recycling like little sprout iconography and a recycling symbol heart, though as contrast to all that i gave him scars and battle damage so you know he kicks ass. Still wanted to keep the trashcan look so his head kinda resembles those trashcans with the spinny rotating lids, tried my best to make the rest of the body also trashcanny. Turned that vacuum gun of his into a megaman-type arm gun because why did they make it a separate component that’s so stupid.

Starchild: turned him from a rip-off Guardians of the Galaxy character into something more like a rock monster guy since his main ability's called Diamond Skin and it does.... guess what. I put crystals on different parts of his body and I thought about the "hair" on his body being made of those weird fuzzy kinds of crystals (realized it was a missed opportunity to give him chest hair rip). Wanted to make his name "Star Child" a lot more literal by inspiring him off of a shooting star, which is why I gave him that plume of smoke for hair. Since he's a (former) proud tribal warrior guy I wanted his design to lean more heavily into that by giving him tattoos that are like geometric stone carvings??? and giving him clothes and jewelry that give a sort of non-existent tribal culture vibe, his clothes also have a sort of bismuth pattern to them.

Teo: okay this fucker was the reason why I did not finish this. His design was so unimaginably boring that it was very difficult to come up with a "twist" for him while still having him be the standard shooty guy. Days later I immediately thought "Space Dandy" and decided to make him be way more flamboyant with a pompadour as his main feature, befitting of the "goofy space adventure" vibe this game tried and failed to capture. In my head his backstory was that he was raised from birth to be a regular ass disposable space soldier, leaving the army much much later to pursue a quest for self-identity... the identity he chose for himself being that of an over-the-top galactic popstar. I imagine his "Smoke Bomb" ability being glittering colorful smoke instead, like a popstar entering the stage out of artificial smoke clouds.

okay I'm tired. i am cooler than playstation. goodbye

[zerozeroren]

Styles and Attitudes, part 4: Sophie

My girl gave me the most grief XD you have no idea how many fully drawn rejects I now have on my tablet. Sometimes you think that the outfit will be perfect until you see it on the character and realise that no, it just doesn't flow as you wanted it to. Oh well

Anyway, Sophie's style is definitely the most simplistic and casual. She doesn't have much of an aesthetic like her friends do. It's all just... Stuff, you know? A bunch of sweaters, a few pairs of jeans, some shirts and hoodies that she "borrowed" from Tony later into their relationship (both the lilac hoodie and the pink shirt are stolen from him). This habit is a continuation of her getting to wear stuff that her brothers grew out of. For example, her favourite denim jacket used to belong to Adam, and the blue t-shirt that she restyled as a cop top was originally Levi's. Sophie calls this "a love tax" and explains that wearing these things "is like wearing a hug".

Sophie prioritizes comfort over looks, thus often wears oversized pieces (especially tops), yoga pants/leggings, denim and dark colors. Another factor that determines the contents of her wardrobe is money: she doesn't have a lot of cash to spare, so she rarely buys new items, and whatever she does buy she byus on sales or thrift stores. Generally, she does not own much: she had to change cities twice, and quickly got rid of anything that wasn't strictly necessary. This changed once she settled, however: she slowly started to dress up with more variety and let herself have things that weren't of basic need.

Despite not putting much thought into her clothes, Sophie does have preferences. She gravitates towards shades of blue. She's also the character who is most likely to wear funny prints and graphic tees, most oftenly with silly puns on them, just because it makes her - and people around her - smile.

She owns a few skirts and dresses, but they usually are in line with her casual relaxed looks. They still have to be comfy for Sophie to wear them, so she usually pairs them up with leggings to allow herself more movement. However, she also owns a single gown: a wine red option with high heeled shoes to go with it. This gown is reserved for job related occasions: whenever she has to attend an event for the theater, she puts on full makeup (something she almost never does when she's not on stage), heels and this dress. Since she feels like her behaviour needs to match her looks and the occasion's requirements, a Sophie In The Dress and Sophie as is are two completely different people. Sophie's manners change entirely, from a wise-cracking goofball to a sophisticated cynical socialite, which is pretty funny to observe for anyone who has ever seen Sophie's usual antics.

Sophie doesn't think too highly of her looks, which is a product of her self-esteem issues caused by her family and abusive ex. Her take is: "Ume is hot, Nana is beautiful, Hime is cute, and I am... Also here :D". Still, she doesn't really care: she sees her charisma as something more important than her "nose with deviations". Needless to say, once she got to get positive affirmations from her friends, her self-esteem started to improve.

[seattlesea]

Percy Jackson Characters + Styles of Dress

Percy- Alternative + Skater He looks like a skater boy and dresses like one, too. He wears a lot of Thrasher shirts, checkered Vans, chains, beanies, ripped jeans, long socks, light studs, baggy shirts, jeans that are usually black or dark blue, and jackets that are usually leather or denim. His main colors are black and blue accented with gray and white. He accessories perfectly and lightly and always has that one thing that tips his outfit off a bit but otherwise he dresses pretty well and only dresses for himself (and almost never combs his hair). He has a lot of pins and sewed stickers on his jackets and usually has his skateboard with a bunch of spray-painted designs on the back with him. He sometimes wears ripped tank tops and/or jeans and flannel shirts and his favorite article of clothing is a black beanie Grover bought him.

Annabeth- Nerdy Academia + Comfy Half the time she wears skinny jeans, cardigans, scarves, long-sleeved shirts, button-up shirts, baggy pants, and the occasional skirt and the other half of the time she wears oversized hoodies, sweatpants, sweaters, and baggy shirts. She owns a hundred different belts, mostly wears short boots, and likes to accessorize with small gold jewelry and always has some sort of brown purse with her to hold her books and blueprints. She usually looks like the human personification of the coffee shop aesthetic and her main colors are brown, white, and cream with dark yellow and black accents. Her favorite article of clothing is a dark orange dress shirt that goes with anything. 

Jason-  Prep + Plain He wears the epitome of the Dad™ outfits- polo shirts, jeans, t-shirts, belts, sneakers, khakis, knee-shorts, sandals, and striped or button-up shirts. He sometimes wears suspenders and looks super nerdy in them but otherwise has a very plain and simple style. He likes to look presentable but doesn’t care that much about fashion. He’ll wear the occasional denim jacket, hoodie, and combat boots and the only accessory he has ever worn was a watch until Reyna bought him a gold chain necklace he always wears but tucks into all his shirts. His main colors are white, purple, and blue with light gray accents. His favorite article of clothing is a white polo shirt from his favorite shop at New Rome.

Piper- Casual + Simple She wears basic, everyday clothes most people own like sweaters, denim and snowboarding jackets, sneakers, hiking boots, t-shirts, tank tops, shorts, and skinny jeans (ripped and not). She likes to keep it plain and simple- just like Jason- and rarely accessories, usually just going for whatever’s comfiest. She doesn’t really care about fashion but will occasionally wear a cardigan, small accessory like a bracelet or necklace, or hoodie that most likely belongs to Jason. Her main colors are green and blue with orange and white accents. Her favorite article of clothing is the white snowboarding jacket her mom returned to her after claiming her at Camp Half-Blood.

Frank- Cozy + Athletic He loves comfy, warm clothes. His wardrobe mostly consists of large hoodies, sweats, cuffed jeans, baggy t-shirts, zip-up sweaters, and sneakers but also often wears athletic clothes like Nike tank tops, workout shorts, gym shoes, and athletic tops. Other than that he wears the typical Camp Jupiter outfit and his main colors are blue, purple, and white with accents of red and brown. He also likes wearing clothes with Canadian-flag prints on them. His favorite article of clothing is a large, dark gray Adidas hoodie that mysteriously goes missing every few days (ahemHazelahem).

Hazel- Old-Fashioned + Cottagecore Her style is the cutest. Sometimes she wears vintage clothing from the early 1900′s as that’s what she’s most used to, so she sometimes wears cute vintage dresses, gloves, and pearl jewelry, but she mostly wears flowy dresses, riding boots, skirts, comfy shirts, jeans, baggy sweaters, and overalls and overall shorts and usually accessories with her own jewelry, cute pins, and flowers, especially flower crowns (courtesy of her step-mother Proserpina). She loves floral-print, often steals hoodies and t-shirts five times too big for her from Frank, likes wearing sparkly makeup (usually in gold), and her main colors are white, cream, and light brown with pink and light green accents. Her favorite article of clothing is a pearl necklace similar to one her mother used to wear. 

Leo- Work + Eccentric He has two very different styles. He usually wears clothes that are best suited for his work like plain tops, cargo pants to carry all his tools, army jackets, tool belts, khakis, jeans, and Timberland boots, but whenever he’s out in the mortal world or not working, his style completely changes. He wears bright, flashy colors that don’t go together, random prints (especially floral and cheetah-print), and accessories with different jewelry, mostly bracelets. He owns a lot of silly and graphic tees and has a bunch of fandom merch. His colors for his work clothes are brown, white, and green and his colors for his everyday clothes are every color imaginable. His favorite article of clothing is a yellow t-shirt with a Pikachu face on it, which he bought cause he always used to watch Pokémon with his mom.

Reyna- Androgynous/Butch/Tomboyish + Low-Key Punk Her style screams badass. She wears a bunch of unisex and tomboy clothes like button-up jean shirts, baggy and button-up shirts in general, flannel shirts, jeans, sneakers, beanies, hoodies, and sometimes polo shirts and suspenders but also wears punk-ish clothes like denim or leather jackets, studs, fingerless leather gloves, ripped jeans, combat boots, and punk accessories (courtesy of Thalia), and she looks awesome in a suit. Sometimes she wears binds and mostly accessories with pins and earrings but is comfortable with any style of clothing and it honestly ranges day-to-day, and sometimes when she’s feeling nostalgic she’ll do her hair and makeup really well like she used to at Circe’s Island. She cares about her appearance and every outfit is always on-point and perfect, even if she didn’t try that hard and some colors don’t match with the others. Her main colors are purple, brown, and gold with white, red, and black accents. Her favorite article of clothing is a button-up jean shirt she bought while out with Nico. 

Nico- Emo/Grunge + Girly His style is unique, but not as eccentric as Leo’s. A lot of the time he wears the basic black skull t-shirt, black leather or aviator jacket, black jeans, chains, combat boots, and light accessories with a few studs, but he mixes it up quite often. He also frequently wears grunge-like clothes like faded clothes, floral-print, plaid shirts, baggy sweaters, cardigans, beanies, distressed jeans, denim jackets, and parkas, but- with the help from his Big Sister™ Reyna and feminine queen Drew Tanaka- he experiments with transvestism and loves wearing crop-tops, skirts, flowy dresses, cute tops, and light makeup, usually eyeliner and blush. His colors range from main black with gray and white accents to main brown, blue, and black with green and silver accents to main pink and black with white and light brown accents. He also loves stealing clothes from Reyna cause they’re so big and comfy. He has two favorite articles of clothing- the silver skull ring from Bianca and a black denim jacket with a white skull stitch on the right lapel from Reyna.

Thalia- Punk + Goth She wears mostly punk clothes- ripped-up jackets, studs, chains, band pins, ripped jeans, leather jackets, chain jewelry, and graphic or band tees- but sometimes will go full goth when she feels like it and will wear all-black outfits, black combat boots with a bunch of belts on them, heavy jewelry, studs, and baggy or lacy clothes. She’ll usually just wear black eyeliner but will go all-out with awesome black eyeshadow, black lipstick, and small black designs near her eyelids (courtesy of makeup-professional Reyna). She also wears gold and silver accessories and owns a bunch of lightning-bolt clothes (courtesy of her frenemy Percy). She only wears Hunter of Artemis-style clothes like silvery parkas, gray camo pants, and gray hunting boots when out hunting with the other Hunters but always wears her silver lieutenant circlet. Her main colors are black with white, dark blue, silver, and sometimes gold accents. Her favorite article of clothing is the black leather jacket Luke gave to her before she got turned into a tree.

Rachel- Artsy + Cute She wears clothes that are the epitome of the Artsy Friend™. She usually wears oversized and baggy shirts, jeans with poked holes in them, casual shoes (mostly colorful Converse), overalls and overall shorts, bright-colored and/or striped tees and sweaters, mom jeans, beanies, and jumpers. She carries a palette and a few paintbrushes around with her everywhere in a kanken and always has doodles and paint splatters on her clothes, hands, and arms and sometimes chalk beneath her usually-painted fingernails. Sometimes she practices her art in makeup-form and does amazing detailed eyeshadow or scarily realistic drawings on her arms and legs. She also loves wearing bandanas, sandals, hair pins, scrunchies, and gold accessories. She wears pretty much every color but mostly red, orange, and yellow with green, blue, and purple accents and likes wearing rainbow clothes as well. Her favorite article of clothing is a bright yellow jumper Percy bought her for her birthday. 

[wildernessuntothemselves]

Best of the Best | Part 2

Genre: Smut, Angst

Word Count: 4k

Summary: You promised yourself you’d never fall for another clingy, needy boy who demanded you gave him all your love, only to leave you after he has sucked you dry. Yet here you were, making that same mistake again.  Alternatively: It wasn’t easy being perfect. Sometimes, Taeyong needed someone else to take control. Sometimes, he needed to be broken down completely in order to be put back together again, better and stronger.

Warnings: femdom, sub!taeyong, dom!reader, student/professor relationship, age-gap, semi-public sex, toys, degradation, cheating, Miss kink (?), pwb (professors with benefits)

Moving back and forth on the podium, you try not to let your disappointment show in front of the students as you glance towards the benches, easily picking out the boy with the shock of white hair, and seeing his face remaining as stoic and haughty as ever--as if nothing was amiss, as if he didn’t have a vibrator strapped to his cock at this very moment as well as another one stuck up his ass. He barely even flinched or made any sound to indicate what you were doing with him.

Unlocking your phone as if you were checking a text, you go onto the app that controls the vibrator and turn it to the highest setting, wanting to get any reaction from him. But aside from a slight jump that made his legs hit the bottom side of the desk he was seated at, he remained in control.

Huffing, you turn it off and continue the rest of your lecture with a sour frown on your face. You know you shouldn’t be upset about this; it’s a good thing that Taeyong wasn’t letting on anything. If he was being obvious then you both could get in serious trouble. It’s one thing to fuck a student, and it’s another thing entirely to have him sat in your lecture plugged with toys that you controlled on your phone, all while you were giving a lecture to dozens of students. Still, was it too much to expect him to be squirming or panting just a little bit?

With him sitting there all stoic, the fun of this was entirely removed. This wasn’t nearly as enjoyable as you thought it would be. How disappointing.

__________________________

Not even five minutes after you had gone back to your office, Taeyong bursts through the door and locks it behind him.

He looked crazed, panting and a sheen of sweat covering his skin.

“What’s wrong?” You find yourself worrying, your mind automatically running through different possibilities.

“What’s wrong?” He runs a hand through his hair incredulously, “You’re killing me, noona.”

You scowl at him as he heavily against the door, shamelessly palming himself through his clothes. He knew damn well he wasn’t permitted to call you that, but he does anyway, whether unintentionally or to purposefully anger you, you don’t know.

“First off, I’m not your noona, Mr. Lee. You will address me properly. Understood?”

“Yes.”

“Yes, what?” You hiss, standing up and stalking towards him. He cowers under your shadow. “Yes, Miss.”

“Second of all, you are not allowed to touch yourself, you know that. This—” You swat his hand away and cup his crotch, pressing the heel of your hand into it firmly. “Is mine. You don’t get to touch it without my permission. Is that understood, boy?”

“Yes, Miss.” He whimpers, bucking up into your hand but you promptly remove it, making him cry out. “Ngh, please.”

You grab his face and snarl at him, “You’re lucky we’re on campus or I would’ve smacked your pretty face silly.”

Taeyong shivers, looking at you with longing and you laugh, releasing your hold on him. “God, at least try to hide how much you want it, Lee.”

“On that note, what’s gotten into you? Why are you acting so needy?” He was fine just a few minutes ago. You try to keep out the disappointment from your expression but you don’t think you succeeded.

Taeyong looks at you in shock, “I wasn’t fine! I was dying. I was so close to cumming too when you stopped.”

You were confused by that. “But you didn’t look like it?”  

“Because you told me to not show it.” His eyebrows furrow and a confused pout takes shape on his lips. “Why, did I do something wrong?”

He looks so upset by the prospect of letting you down, and you suddenly realize that, to him, it didn’t matter what he was feeling. If you wanted something, Taeyong would do it. It didn’t matter to him if the toys were affecting him or not, you had ordered him to do something and he was going to try his hardest to please you.

“No, darling, you were perfect.” You stroke his hair softly. How were you supposed to be a sadistic dom when he made you melt so easily? “You are perfect.”

“I’m not.” He mutters, recoiling away from your touch as if it hurt him. It stung but you know it’s not personal.

Taeyong finds it very hard to open himself up or be emotionally intimate. Only after you’ve completely broken him down for the night does he allow you to praise him and build him up again. Before that though, affection only hurts him.

“You’re right. I was just being kind but I guess you don’t deserve that. You keep doing everything as you please like I’m not even here. First, you were going to cum without permission, then you came into my office without me inviting you, and now you were touching yourself without being told. Tell me, Mr. Lee, are you purposefully trying to get on my nerves?”

“No, Miss.”

“Then you must be dumb then, if you can’t follow simple instruction. What do you have inside that little brain of yours that’s preventing you from focusing on anything else, huh?”

“I—“

“What are you thinking about, little kitty?” You run your hands under his hoodie, tickling the skin.

“The vibrator, Miss, it’s driving me crazy.”

“It is?” You arch an eyebrow, and he nods frantically. Heading back to your desk to take a seat, you hear him whine behind you. “Don’t whine or I’ll gag you. Come sit here.”

You pat the desk in front of you, and he immediately scampers to get there. When he’s sat in front of you, you lean back on your chair, appraising him openly.

You switch the vibrator on again and he starts squirming and thrusting up into the air, his cock twitching inside his pants. He moans unabashedly, giving you everything he had deprived you of in the lecture room.

“I only just turned on the toy and you’re already lost, fucking the air and looking for anything to bury your needy cock in. You’re so easy, Taeyongie.” You sneer as you watch him, “I might need to buy you a fleshlight next, for that needy cock of yours.”

“Why don’t you just fuck me?” He spits, frustrated. He’s been begging you to fuck him ever since you started this whole thing but you always denied him. Truth be told, you really really wanted to, but it was so fun teasing him.

“My pussy is too good for an easy slut like you. You have to earn it.”

“What more do you want from me? I’ve been so good.” He tries to palm himself but you smack his hand away.

“Yes, what a good boy you are.” You snap.

“At least take my dick out. It hurts so bad.”

“You want to expose yourself in front of your professor? Filthy boy. How many others have had you like this, splayed on a desk in the privacy of their offices as you let them do whatever they wanted with your body so they’d give you the perfect grades you want?”

“No one. I swear, Miss.” He cries, his fingers fidgeting with the waistband of his pants. “Only you.”

“Such pretty words from such a loose slut.” You sigh, “Alright, show me what you have for me, baby boy.”

With shaky fingers, Taeyong unzips his pants, sighing in relief as he frees his cock from the constraining hold of his tight pants and boxers as he pulls them down over it. It was painfully hard, the top part of it a stark red and his balls swollen. Smiling, you grab your phone again and turn the vibrator on a higher setting, watching him eagerly as he shakes and whimpers in front of you. And yet, it’s still not enough to push him over the edge.

His red and leaking cock was jutting out from the all black ensemble he was wearing, making him look particularly sinful because of how out of place it looked, like he’d just whipped his cock out in the middle of a tutoring lesson.

You needed to see more of him though so you tug on his pants and he lifts his hips up to let you slide them and his boxers off, leaving him in his black hoodie and a pair of black socks. You push on his knees, spreading his legs to better observe his twitching cock that was now leaking all over his black hoodie, staining it.

You tell him to hold the hoodie up and you push him to scootch back on the desk slightly, allowing you to finally see the plug in his ass. It was a pretty pink thing with a sparkly star on the base of it.

Exposed like this, he grows timid, which is ironic, given that he’s the one who begged for this in the first place.

“Sexual fantasies,” You chuckle, tracing the red print on the front of his hoodie, and he blushes, turning red too. “This is quite a fantasy, kitty, getting your ass fucked by the professor in her office.”

Tapping on the base of the plug, you watch the boy’s dick jerk, little gasps falling from his mouth. “Poor kitty, so needy.”

You tease the plug in and out of him as he struggles to keep his top up, a glint of silver the only visible part of his hands that were swallowed up by the sweater-paws.

'You’re so shameless, coming to me in my office when we agreed we wouldn’t do anything on campus. Did you want to be caught?” It was a rhetorical question, Taeyong wasn’t in any state to reply. Besides, the danger only turned him on more. “I guess you’re not really thinking about it, or anything much for that matter. Your head is all empty. All you’re capable of thinking about is sex."

"I should invite other professors over next time, take turns fucking you. I bet they'd love to have a piece of you. You’ll be killing two birds with one stone, you’ll get all the grades you want and you’ll finally be of use to someone." He whimpers at your words, but you know this is what he wanted from you, for you to tear him down.

"You’d make such a pretty fuckdoll, kitty. Why don’t you touch yourself for me, baby?” You coo at him, lids falling heavy as you suddenly feel the urge to see him stroke himself.

He rushes to obey, his fingers--slender and tall and elegant, all the accentuated by the multiple silver rings he was wearing—look amazing, contrasting with the vulgarity of what he’s doing. It was thrilling to watch the elegant boy act so vulgarly. He didn’t even pull the arm of his hoodie up, content to stroke himself with his covered hand.  

"Please, Miss. I’ve been waiting for so long. Can I please cum now? I've been good, please.”

"There isn't a good bone in your body."

“Please, please, Miss.”

“If you’re going to keep begging then you might as well leave. You know how I feel about begging; it’s incredibly dull, Mr. Lee.” You were lying of course. You lived to hear him beg.

“No, no, ple—“ He starts saying but catches himself, sputtering.

“Look at you. You can’t even say a word that isn’t some pathetic groveling.” You snarl at him, and push back in your chair. “Stop.”

“What?” He sputters.

“I don’t wanna see this anymore. Pull your pants up and leave my office.”

“But, Miss--”

“I’ve heard enough from you. Get out.” You cross your arms, giving him a look that brooks no argument.

He knew better than to challenge you. Sitting up, he winces as he puts himself back in his pants. You don’t even push your chair back to give him space, stay close as he buttons his pants and straightens up.

“See you at our private session, Mr. Lee.” You smile up at him, delighting in the flustered look on his face.

___________________________________________

From the moment he left your office to the moment you had him straddling you on top of your bed, you suffered as much as he did, maybe even more, but he can’t know that. It’s important that he thinks that you aren’t as affected by all of this as he is. It’s important he feels small and insignificant. That’s what he needs from you.

“I can’t even use your little cock. It’s good for nothing but looking pretty. It could never satisfy me. I bet you never even made a woman cum on it.” You slap his dick lightly before going back to stroking it harshly. “You were made to be wrecked. I can't believe no one broke you yet."

“Shit, I’m so close, Miss.” His hips shake as he struggles to support his weight and not crush you under him.

“Get it over with then.” You say in a bored tone that makes his body flush with humiliation, giving him the push he needs.

As soon as the first spurt of cum shoots out of his cock, you take your hands off him.

“No, why?” He cries, his own hands flying to his cock to touch himself but he barely gets one stroke in before you pin his hands to his sides and force him to endure the ruined orgasm, his cum landing on your exposed breasts as he humps the air above you. "Good boy, coming untouched for Miss. Such a good boy."

He stops fighting at your words of praise, resigning to bucking his hips into the empty air as cum continues dribbling down his cock. When nothing more comes out, you place your hands on him and start pumping him again.

At the sudden stimulation, Taeyong arches into your touch and his hips start moving again, fucking himself into your hand despite the pain.

"Wow, you really are a painslut, huh? Come on, I know you've got more in you. Give Miss more of your cum.” You coax, your hands moving rapidly over his red length, the remainder of his cum coating his dick in a white film and dribbling down your wrist. “I want to milk your balls dry. Maybe that will stop you from thinking about sex all the time."

“Yes, Miss.” He breathes out, letting you do what you want with his body.

When you think you’ve gotten all you could out of him, you let his limp cock go and he sighs in relief, panting and shaking as he tries to calm down. You take advantage of his open mouthed gasps and stick your fingers inside his mouth. “Good boys clean up after themselves.”

He cleans your fingers with his tongue, fighting to keep breathing as he licks up his cum. But he doesn’t stop when your hand is all clean. Instead, he leans down to lick your breasts clean too. And if he leaves behind any unnecessary kisses, you let it pass, enjoying the feeling of his mouth on you too much to reprimand him.

By the time he’s cleaned everything off, your nipples were poking out and you were squeezing your thighs together to get some friction, something that doesn’t escape his notice.

“Let me eat you out, Miss. I can make you feel really good.”

“You think you deserve to make me cum?” You pant, as if you weren’t gushing from how turned on you were right now. “Why shouldn’t I just fuck myself with a dildo? It’s gonna feel so much better than your sloppy head.”

“Please let me try.”

“You better not disappoint me.” You warn, spreading your legs for him to push his face between.

You bite down on the gasp that forms in your throat as soon as his tongue runs up your slit, not wanting to betray how needy you were. His movements are calculated, his ears perked up so he could listen to every sound you make, his body attenuated to sense every twitch of your own body, quickly picking up what you like.

“Can I use my fingers?” He mumbles right against your lips, not even pulling away, and the vibrations make you shiver.

“Yes.” You don’t have the energy to act aloof anymore, you want his fingers inside you as you come on his face. They were so pretty, thin and long, the shape of them fitting nicely inside your pussy and hitting all the right spots.

He doesn’t try to find your g-spot, keeping his fingers straight as he fucks them in and out of you, going as fast and deep as he can. It’s too much, the overwhelming pleasure forcing you to arch your hips off the bed which only pushes your pussy more against his eager mouth, his tongue abandoning its deliberate strokes in favor of flicking over your clit.  

He can tell that you’re close, and he adds a third finger inside you, still monitoring your every move with determined eyes. It’s a tight fit, but the extra stretch makes his finger drag all that much more against your walls and when he puckers his lips and sucks on your clit, you explode.  

The orgasm he brings you is so intense that when it’s over, you fall back on the bed, boneless. He presses one last kiss over your sore pussy before he climbs up your body, your eyes falling on his glistening lips, so swollen and slick from eating you out, and you can’t help but pull him into a searing kiss.  

When you pull away, he stares at you with an unreadable expression on his face, and you realize that this is the first time you’ve ever kissed him.

Clearing your throat, you gently push him to sit on the bed next to you then you grab a bottle of juice from the night stand and open it. Brushing the sweaty hair out of his face, you press the open bottle to his lips. “Drink up, kitten.”

He gratefully obliges, closing his eyes as the cool liquid flows down his throat. When he’s finished with the bottle you set it aside and push him to lie down. “Do you want to take a shower now?”

He shakes his head, “Can we stay like this for just a little longer?”

“Uh, sure.” You reply awkwardly, not knowing what to do.

You settle on sitting down next to him with your back against the headboard, something that Taeyong doesn’t seem too pleased with. You could tell he wanted you to cuddle, but there needed to be some limits. You had to make sure he was alright while also not giving him the wrong idea.

When he realizes you are not gonna move, he huffs, grabbing your legs and wrapping his body around them, his face coming to rest on your thighs.

His raspy voice breaks the silence. “Aren’t you going to ask me why I let you treat me this way?”

“You don’t let me, sweetheart, you beg for it.” Your comment makes Taeyong blush and nuzzle into your thigh to hide his flushed face from you. You catch yourself smiling at the cute gesture and quickly drop the smile. “And I don’t need to ask. Everything about you screams only child who is being held to impossible standards by his emotionally and physically unavailable parents. I’ve seen thousands of kids like you.” None as striking though, is what you leave out.

You feel a pang in your chest as he deflates at your words.You know you shouldn’t care. You’ve done more than your part, but you can’t stop the question that slips out of you, needing to not make him feel so undesirable. “That’s why you wanted that A so badly right?”

Taeyong’s expression lifts a little, encouraged that you seem to have an interest in his personal life after all. "Yes. My parents don’t involve themselves in my life if I'm doing well, but if I slip for just a second, they're on me like vultures. They don’t care about me, all they want is that I maintain the dignity of the family name. But with you, I can be myself. I can fuck up and be human and it won’t matter. You’ll just put me back together again."

You’re scared by how much his words affect you. He shouldn’t be so thankful to you. He shouldn’t depend on you like this. And yet, you find yourself delighting in being a safe place for him, your heart soothed by the notion that you could help him somehow, even if it was wrong.

“I’m sorry I was so hard on you.”

"No! You were just doing your job, I understand that. I can see that you really care about our education. You could just wing it like most of the other professors who don’t give a shit about anything except the money and prestige that comes with their position, but you actually want to teach us something worthwhile. You’re not doing this job just for the benefits. You’re passionate about it and it shows. That’s why I admire you so much."

He rests his hand on top of yours, looking up at you with emotion in his eyes. It was too much for you, how much he notices, how much feels. It was too much.

“You admire me? What happened to the boy who called me a bitter bitch and was gonna dick me down?” You deflect, trying to smother down the flutter in your heart.

Taeyong turns bashful at the reminder. “I guess we both misjudged each other. But I really do admire you.”

You can tell he was being genuine. He really does see beyond the dejected shell of your old self, and it makes your heart soar despite your attempts to suffocate it. Wanting to take the heat off yourself, you shift the discussion to him. “What about you? Is there something you’re passionate about?”

“Dancing and rapping.” He answers readily, his eyes sparkling.

“Oh, I didn’t know you performed.”

“You wouldn’t. No one knows except my team.”

“Why not?”

“Because it doesn’t fit with the image everyone has of me. My parents want a ruthless, intelligent son who will inherit their empire. My friends want a powerful ally who will support them in their own business ventures in the future. They’re not interested in what I want to do. It doesn’t matter to them. We only hang out because our families want us to be close, but all we do is try to one-up each other.”

“What about your girlfriend?”

He breathes out a laugh, “My girlfriend wants a rich husband who can provide everything she asks for. To her I’m only as good as my family’s stock value is.”

“That’s horrible.” You say, genuinely upset. Everyone should have at least either friends or family to support them. Having neither is just too cruel. “Isn’t there anyone you could call a true friend?”

“There was one, Yuta.” His eyes glaze over as a memory plays behind them. “He was an exchange student back in first year. He didn’t care about my family or anything but he liked me for who I was. He was so chill and open minded and I could be myself around him.” Taeyong remembers fondly and you find yourself smiling at him. But his smile soon falls. “He didn’t stay long though, said he missed Japan.”

“Do you still keep in contact with him?”

“Barely.”

“Why? A long distance relationship that is genuine is better than nothing. Plus, I’m sure that with your money you can afford to travel to Japan every weekend to see him.” You rib him, hoping he’d crack a smile. What you said wasn’t funny, but Taeyong was so ready to smile at anything that he laughs for you.

Suddenly he sits up, his eyes shining with a question he was reluctant to speak. “Would you maybe… like to come see me perform one day?”

Your breathing stops. You weigh your options carefully. On the one hand, you shouldn’t get too involved with him, that will only cause trouble for the both of you. But on the other hand, if you refuse then you’d be just like every other person in his life, only interested in him for what he can offer you.

“I’ll think about it.”

He smiles tenderly, choosing to believe you.

You let him stay over that night. It just didn’t feel right to have him pour his heart out to you and then you promptly going “Welp, that sucks. Time to go now. Don’t forget to take your soul-crushing sorrow with you on the way out.”

You’d always been weak for boys like him.

___________________________________

A/N: after eons and eons, part two is here lol let me know what you think. feedback is really what motivates me to write more

[antigoneidk]

can you write a blurb about stealing tom’s hoody and then he find s out and think its cute

Green hoodie|t.h.

A/N : thank you so much for your request babyy and sorry for being late but the stuff that are happening in this world right now are unbelievable. I don't want to be boring but we all know that we have to stop this kind of shit some people think they're allowed to do. Is not their job to take a man's life like that.

Warning : fluff,fluff,fluff

_

You spent the other night on your boyfriend's house,after an wonderful date the two of you had. You went bowling,with you winning and him pretending that he actually let you win. Just like teenage boy. Either way you wanted to make him dinner,take care of him and so you did at his place,just like he desired. The dark night found you sleeping in his arms,the moon hitting your face from the huge window.

You woke up at the couch,with a pillow in your arms that smelled like him. You squeezed more before letting a horrible sound come through your mouth. You sat up,stretching. Every bone inside you cracked,leaving you feeling how much of an grandma you were.

A green hoodie was lying at the edge of the couch. You had a prepared speech exclusive for yourself,about how you shouldn't steal any of his hoodies anymore. It wasn't yours,he gave his money to buy it for him,it was big for you-

You grabbed and putted on your body. The warmth and his body smell gave you enough comfort. You wrapped yourself with your hands and closed your eyes and suddenly it felt like he was next to you,hugging you. Even in your imagination,he had the power to wake the butterflies inside you and making the dance all over.

You were now walking towards the kitchen. Two cups of tea were on the table,one of them half empty,probably his. You took the other one in your hands,taking a sip and letting the hot drink warm your throat.

"Babe?"you asked waiting for his answer. Dead silence.

You moved to his bedroom. Maybe he went back to sleep there,not wanting to wake you up. You opened the door slowly and tried to be as quiet as possible. You had a big smile on your face just with his image lying down,sleeping. He was adorable like that. But he wasn't there either. Not even at the bathroom.

"Tom? Where are you?"what if he left? Maybe something came up and he had to leave early? That's why his cup was glad empty. But he could write you a note or even text you. A sad,cold feeling tickled you from head to toe as you were going back to the kitchen.

You finished your tea and decided to leave the house and go back to yours. Probably it was an emergency and he forgot to tell you.

"Call me when you see this. I left" you closed it and drove to your own place.

_

Clothes all over the floor,even in places that they weren't supposed to be. Dishes in the sink,begging you to clean them. Even coffee was spilled at your dinning table. Yes you were the most messiest person you've ever met but this was an whole another level. Immediately started with the coffee stain and then with the dishes.

After a while your phone rang. With soaking hands you checked it.

Babe💞appeared on your screen.

"Finally.Where have you been?"you asked.

"I was with Tessa outside. Why did you leave? I've been looking for you for about 10 minutes"you slapped your forehead with your hand and closed your eyes. You didn't even noticed that the dog wasn't there.

"I thought that something came up and that's why. I was so sleepy to see that Tessa wasn't with me either. I'm sorry"

"You don't have to my love, I just got scared but I saw your message so it's fine.You liked my tea huh?"

"I did yes,I always do"you laughed and heard his laugh from the speaker. The sound you loved the most in this planet.

"Oh..um..I left it here"he stopped and you heard him talk to himself,almost whispering.

"What happened?"you started feeling worried about him.

"My green sweater is missing too. Well it's gonna be somewhere here"you smiled and started playing with his hoodie,resting in one of the chairs now. You didn't want to wet it."Anyway,I'll be there in twenty minutes,I missed you"

"Already?"you giggled"I slept in your arms last night Tom"

"That is the reason why"you felt blushing and you looked down,as he was standing in front of you,not even a ten year old wouldn't act like this.

"I'll be waiting then"you said and looked at the mess behind you. You had to be quick.

"Love you"

"Love you too"you hang up on him and got back to work. He didn't have to see this chaos.

_

You were of how quick you done almost everything. It was definitely better than before and also you felt really motivated and productive. Feelings not so familiar. But that went away fast,as you started feeling exhausted. You sat at the couch and put something to watch. And as you felt like you were about to sleep,your doorbell rang,waking you up.

Tom.

You got up and almost ran to the door,but something green stopped you. You got his sweater in your hands and hid it behind a huge pillow. You didn't want him to find in your place. You thought that he would be upset about it. He was about to find it someday at his closet all of the sudden. Surprise. You ran again and opened the door. Two hands lifted you from the ground getting you inside again.

"Hii"you screamed with a higher voice and hugged his head,pulling into your chest.

"Hello baby"he kissed your lips and the time stopped there. Fairies around you,throwing glitter making this moment magical,just like the others. Every kiss was on your mind,with every detail. His hands around your waist,your feet around his,your stomach making turns inside your body,your heart about to explode.

"What is this?"you turned around looking at his hands,after feeling something scratching your back.

"I bought something to eat. I didn't have time to make anything and I know how lazy you get "he smiled and you felt your feet touching the ground again. You clapped your hands and got back to the room you spent most of your time today,to grab two plates and cups.

"I'm starving"you said looking at the Heaven in front of your eyes as the smells were flying in the air.You sat next to him,his arms around your shoulders and enjoying your food.

"Next time please leave a note"you said and turned to face him.

"I left for 30 minutes. I didn't think you'd leave."

"I thought that something important happened and that you wouldn't be back. That's the reason I left"you took another bite."And don't ask what would happen if Tessa was there. You know I'd take her with me"

"I know I've had to tell you but you were so adorable that it would have been a sin waking you up"he looked at you with a smile on his lips.

"Oh stop"you rolled your eyes at his compliment."you're being silly now"you placed your plate at the little table. He did the same and grabbed your waist,not letting you leave,as you planned.

"I'm not being silly,I'm telling you the truth. You are adorable baby,can't you see it?"he pushed your hair behind your ear"Every time you look at me and I'm melting. I'm falling in love more and more with how amazing you are. From the way you talk and act with other people I can tell that you're special. Even in your bad days you try to make everyone around you happy or even smile. And when I'm sick or not in a good mental state,you look after me and I know you're gonna be there with me to ease the pain. I'm forever grateful from my decisions that led me straight to you"

"And your outside. Your hair,you eyes,your lips,your body everything attracts me. The way you walk,or talk,or even doing something flatters me. My heart skips a beat from the sight of you,whenever you walk towards me and you smile. You're creature that's here to kill me and I love it"his lips met yours one more time. His hand on your cheek,a movement that you adored the most. Your hands playing with his hair and making him moan from his good it made him feel.

"I love you"you whispered to his ear and hugged him tight. He knew hot to cheer you up and make you feel the most loved person. You questioned the universe if you deserved such a lovely soul as his.

But he knew how to ruin romantic moments like these,better than anyone by just starting to tickle you.

His hands crossing your whole body and yours trying to stop him. You laughed loud and without taking any breaths. Your lungs begged for air but he couldn't let you. Tears started running from your eyes and screams from your mouth. He suddenly stopped and you took it as a  opportunity to run away from him. For a moment you thought he was sitting but as you turned around you saw him just an inch behind you. He picked you up once again and throw you back to your previous spot,this time with him on the top of you.

He was now kissing you with lust. Your legs around his torso,pulling him closer. Your hands under his shirt,scratching his back and making him moan to you. His big hands scanning your skin,every inch of it as it was something unique. His tongue fighting with yours,a fight he won everytime. You needed more of him. You needed him.

You tried to throw the huge pillows that decorated your couch to the side. But you forgot something.

"Is that my sweater?"his green hoodie was lying next to your bodies. He took it away and looked down at you. But your red face was hidden by your arms. You felt embarrassed and got scared for his reaction.

"I won't ask again,is that my hoodie y/n?"

You nodded to him. He left the sweater aside and tried to take your hands out of his way. You refused as much as possible,but he was stronger than you,you both knew that. Your face was now exposed and you bit your lower lip nervous.

"Why didn't you tell me you had it?"you couldn't meet his eyes.

"I was about to give it back to you. Well no,I wanted to put it in your closet without you knowing i stole it"you blinked fast."I'm sorry it won't happen again"

"I'm not mad darling,look at me"you didn't. He touched your chin and and then forced you to look him."I actually think it's cute that you wear them. They look good on you and they make you even more beautiful"

"You're not mad?"you asked him.

"Why would I be mad at you?"

"Because I stole it"you laughed nervously and ran your fingers through your hair.

"Put it on"he commanded. You raised your eyebrows without saying a word and following his demands. He took your hand and made his way to your bedroom,standing in front of the mirror.

"See? You look adorable babe. How can I be mad when you look like this?"you met his eyes as his hands hugged your little body from behind.

"I look like a potato in this"you closed your eyes at the feeling of his chest to your back."The only reason I wear them is that I feel you're with me all day. They smell like you"

He kissed your head and you turned around,your hands on his waist.His side smile,woke up your butterflies,starting to fly on your belly.

"You look cute and I want you to wear them all day and night. You can take them whenever you want"you kissed his cheek and giggled."And don't say you're sorry anymore for these kind of stuff.Please"he begged you with puppy eyes. You couldn't resist,it would be a shame.

"I'm sorry,I'll stop"you raised your one eyebrow,before starting kissing him again.

"Where were we?"

____________

Hope you enjoyed and sorry for any mistakess❣

[itzagothamcitysiren]

Welcome to the Family

After a nap and some sonic I have the energy to finish editing this chapter so I can post it :) I might also post the chapter after this as well instead of waiting until tomorrow night since I’m working until close!

There’s a Web That You Have Wove pt.4

           Jason gave himself one more look in the mirror before deciding he was ready. He didn’t go too far with his appearance, he still had to keep up with the whole ‘I don’t care’ vibe he gave off after all. He settled with a black shirt and jeans, with his best beat up pair of combat boots. He lastly threw on a thin red hoodie. He thought about wearing his leather jacket, but wasn’t sure about wanting to wear it all night. He still grabbed it, holding it in his arms. . He made sure he had his phone and keys, checking the time. It was almost seven.

           Exiting the room, he walked across the hallway, remembering to knock on the door adjacent from his. He could hear movement on the other side, like someone was flustered. She heard another voice as well, a female one.  His eyebrows rose as he knocked again, curious as to who else was in the room. A few seconds later the door was torn open, a very rattled Halley being shown.

           Jason looked her up and down, taking in her appearance. He was impressed, he thought she’d just slum it with some leggings and a baggy sweater. She instead wore a Star Wars t-shirt that was a little worn, but had a vintage look too it. Her dark blue skinny jeans had small rips at the knees but weren’t too crazy over the top like a lot of jeans in that style. She even added some flair with a blue and black flannel tied around her hips. He noted her face even had make-up on it which was something he never saw before.   It wasn’t much, just eyeliner and mascara, but it was noticeable and made her eyes pop.

           “Oh is that Jason!” A sweet voice called, pulling the two teens gazes away from each other. They looked into the room where Halley’s laptop set on her desk with a video chat open. Jason recognized the tanned orange skinned babe as the Titan Starfire and nodded in greeting. “I guess you don’t need my help anymore, I hope you two have fun at your party! Be responsible and make good choices!” She waved at them happily, before exiting the chat.

           Jason looked down at Halley questioning, as the girl let him in the room sheepishly. It was then when Jason took note of the state of the room. He snorted at the clothes thrown around the room haphazardly. She was really stressed about this party. She blushed as his eyes trailed across the room, rushing to start gathering the different shirts and pants and throwing them in her closet. She kicked her more personal articles of clothing underneath the bed, hoping he didn’t see them and turned back around to face him.

           “I didn’t know what to wear.” She shrugged awkwardly, rubbing the back of her neck. She’d called Kori in a haze, after trying on the tenth outfit of her limited choices. What did someone wear to one of things?

           After the initial reaction of Kori being excited about her going to her first party with the earthlings, as she called them, Kori made her go through each article of clothing, now insisting on visiting the younger girl for a much needed shopping trip. With a roll of her eyes, Halley eventually was able to pick a comfy but cute outfit out with the help of the Tamaranean.

           Moving to grab her sneakers she sat on her bed to put them on, already wanting to itch her eyes. Kori insisted she use some of the make-up she’d bought for her and guided her through the process. It took a couple of attempts to get the eyeliner on straight, but Halley felt proud that she accomplished such a silly little thing.

           Once her shoelaces were tied she stood back up, putting her phone in her pocket and moving back to Jason. “Okay, let’s get this over with it.”

           Jason nodded, excitingly leading her out of the room. They met Alfred downstairs and soon ended up in the butler’s favorite car to drive; the family Royce. The drive was filled with Alfred telling them to be careful, and to be mindful, and that he’d pick them up by eleven. That was less than four hours, Halley could manage that. Once his speech was over, the car was silent until they arrived at Sam’s parent’s penthouse in Gotham Heights.  The Heights were in the northern part of Gotham, and considerably one of the nicer areas. It was still not the greatest idea to walk around at night but it was the complete opposite of the East End.

           Eagerly, Jason exited the car first, patting the back of Alfred seat as a thank you. Halley hesitated, giving one more pleading look at the butler before groaning. She joined Jason on the curb, who gave a wave as the Royce pulled away. Halley frowned, seeing other kids being dropped off and rushing inside the building. She crossed her arms against her chest, already wishing she just kept her mouth shut and simply backed out. Her entire plan backfired on her.

           She was brought out of it when something fell on top of her shoulders. She looked up seeing Jason placing his leather jacket on her. She wasn’t crossing her arms because she was cold, she thought glaring up at him. She was crossing them because she wanted to be at home. Before she could protest, he grabbed her hand and pulled her inside of the building.

           She held the jacket in place with her free hand so it wouldn’t fall as he tugged her towards the elevator. He dropped her hand when he saw the group of kids who entered before them also waiting for the elevator. She used this opportunity to slide her arms through the sleeves, the jacket obviously being too big for her but glad she now had something to hide in now. Putting her hands in the pockets she followed the group into the elevator.

           She didn’t recognize the other teens that stood with them, but that’s how she felt throughout most of the night. There were a handful of people she did have classes with but she also noted how there were a lot of juniors and seniors at the party as well. She was glad that Jason stuck with her for the most part, only leaving to get them drinks. Of course the punch was spiked, as Jason took a large sip, eyeing Halley to take a sip of hers. She frowned, never drinking before. She shook her head and shoved the cup towards him. He shrugged and took it for himself.

           Her eyes trailed around the barely light penthouse. The music pounded loudly as people danced in the center of the room. She couldn’t stop the frown that took over her face as she quickly found herself grow bored. She tried to make conversation with him but lost her concentration over the pounding bass coming from the speakers. She looked back down at her feet, fisting her hands inside her pockets. How was Jason having a good time? They just stood leaning against a wall, people watching. She looked up at him, at he wore his classic smirk, taking another sip of from the cup he got her. Damn he drank that fast.

           “Halley!”

           The pair looked to the side, seeing a boy approach them. Jason cocked an eyebrow recognizing him from their journalism class. Well, her journalism class. Due to him skipping so much, Jason was taken out of it and place in a study program during that period to help bring his grades up. Jason didn’t even notice his eyes narrow as Halley’s frown disappeared as the boy approached.

           “Hey Dylan.” She greeted with a smile. She could hear Jason let out a scoff behind her and furrowed her brows at him before turning back to her friend.

           “I didn’t think you’d come to this kind of thing.” The brunette boy said, his hands in his jean’s pockets as he spoke to her. He greeted Jason, and gave him a look when Jason just grunted in response.

            “You too,” She said, moving off the wall so she could hear him better over the loud music.

           “I never get invited to these things, so when I did I wanted to see what it was all about. Not sure what I think yet,” Dylan shrugged, laughing at the end, his eyes showing is distaste for the obvious.

           “I think I know what I think of it.” She muttered, leaning back against the wall.

           Jason rolled his eyes at her, moving closer so their shoulders were touching. Dylan noted Jason holding onto the red solo cup and pointing to Halley, “Do you want a water?”

           “Sure, that would be great.” She smiled widely, thanking him as he walked off.

           “That would be great,” Jason mimicked, taking a sip of his drink, finishing if off. “Gross; you better make sure he doesn’t ruffie you.”

           “Excuse you?” Halley gasped, looking up at him in surprised. She looked offended, placing a hand on her hip, “And why in the hell would he do that?”

           “He was totally just flirting with you,” Jason snorted, feeling his chest tighten. Maybe he drank to fast? He felt his face grow hot as he looked at her big eyes. Jerking his head away, he cussed at himself. Dylan could flirt with her all he wanted, he didn’t care. He was just offended that she’d take his offer of giving her a drink over his. Yeah, that was why he excused himself as he saw the brunette walking back over to them with two cups.

           He found his mood spoiled as he sat across the room glaring down the girl as she leaned up against the wall with his replacement. It had taken her a few minutes to lighten up after Jason stalked away, confused by his sudden outburst. I’m just as confused as you, babe, he thought to himself. Sneering at himself for his thought, he reached for the new cup he grabbed on the way over here.

           He would admit he was jealous to himself, but only because he wanted to be spending time with her. You know? Outside from being Gotham’s young vigilantes. Sure, they spent time at the manor together and the occasional trip out with Dick, but he wanted to see her out of her comfort zone of the living room in the manor. He wanted to spend the night making fun of all their idiotic classmates and watch the drama play out in front of them. Like the girl sitting with her friends clustered around her crying because her crush was dancing with another girl. He and Halley loved making fun of stuff like that because problems like that were so trivial compared to theirs. But here he was acting like the exact type of person they laughed at during lunch.

           “No way! Are you crazy?” Dylan’s voice of amusement brought a laugh out of Halley, shrugging as she held a hand to her mouth. Dylan’s face of bewilderment grew, processing what he was just told. “You like the prequels? Like no joke, you will sit down and watch them on your own accord without being forced and watch them all the through with no complaints.”

           “I don’t think they’re that bad,” She giggled, raising her hand up in defense. She grinned loving the easy flow of conversation between the pair.

           She knew they got along in the class they shared together, but didn’t know how much they had in common. They both loved Star Wars and both hated parties. There were other things that came up that they shared but right now those stuck out to her the most as their conversation shifted from how lame they thought this party was and to him complimenting her shirt, motioning to his Boba Fett shirt.  

           “Eh, to each their own I guess.” He sneered, mocking a look of disgust. “I still think you’re uncultured.”

           He sighed, as they entered a comfortable moment of silence. He was glad he bumped into her, thinking she’d been really nice and sweet beforehand. He was about to leave after only being at the party for an hour but was surprised when he saw her here. He knew how much she hated Sam and figured she wouldn’t come. He felt his stomach growl, and looked towards the kitchen, not really in the mood for the cold pizza and snacks that lay on the countertops.

           “You wanna get out of here?” He offered, his eyes flickering to the door before wincing when he realized how sleazy he looked. He saw her eyes widened in nervousness and trailed back. Blushing he corrected himself, “Not like that! I meant, I’m just hungry and want like an actual meal.” He laughed timidly, rubbing his arms.

           “Oh, yeah,” She said hurriedly, as if pretending she wasn’t slightly thrown off by his sudden question. She nodded, wanting to leave but frowned. “I came here with Jason, can he come? I’d feel bad leaving him.” She asked honestly, she didn’t want to just ditch him even if he was acting weird.

           “Yeah of course. We can go to that burger place downtown.” He nodded, as they headed towards where Jason sat.

           “Caroline’s? Yes, I love them!” She said excitedly, pausing to stand in front of Jason. He looked up at her questioning and looking slightly miffed. She tried to ignore it, just chalking it up to him drinking too much and tried giving him a smile. “Hey want to go get Caroline’s with us?”

            Jason huffed, looking between the two before settling on Halley. He looked her up and down, pissed off for no real good reason. Clenching his hands into fists he stood up, he towered over her a couple of inches and shook his head, “Nah, I’m good. Have fun.”

           Halley wrinkled up her eyebrows, as he walked past her before ruffling her hair. She looked up to Dylan and apologized for Jason’s rudeness, “I don’t know what’s wrong with him.” She muttered as they began to leave the party, heading towards her friend’s car. He loved Caroline’s and would never pass up the opportunity to grab some.

            What the hell was his problem?

[girls-scenarios]

Ain’t Together

Idol: Heejin (Loona)

Prompt: loona heejin scenario where her and reader kiss all the time and do coupley things but for some reason heejin still thinks they’re just friends?

Writer: Admin Kiwi

A/N: This title is based on one of my favorite King Princess songs “Ain’t Together” so go give it a listen! I ended up making this kind of angst-y at the beginning, but I hope this is what you had in mind, anon!

♡ Tip Jar♡

You were the one who’d gotten yourself into this mess. Really, it was your own fault. But had anyone else been in your shoes, they would have fallen for her too.

Heejin was beautiful. Anyone could see that. She had a small face, soft, long hair, sparkly dark eyes that crinkled at the sides when she smiled, and a cute excited smile that made her nose scrunch up just a little bit. Not to mention her low, dulcet voice and charming laugh, or her slender fingers, lightly calloused from guitar, and her soft hands. Or the way she always smelt like French perfume. She was the most perfect person you’d ever encountered, and this perfect person had smiled at you like you were the only person in the world. How could you not fall for her?

You should have said no the first time it happened. She’d been a little tipsy from the cocktails she’d had at dinner, and had invited you over for ice cream at her place. But as soon as you’d sat down, she’d turned to you with her cheeks flushed and her lips parted just slightly.

“Can I kiss you?”

Your face had turned red and you’d felt yourself stuttering, not knowing what to do. You’d been tipsy too, so your brain was jumbled, not responding when you wanted it to. “Uh,” you’d said, and she’d turned up her lips to pout at you.

“Please? I wanna practice.”

Practice? What had that even meant? But it had been impossible to say no. You’d always been whipped for her. So you’d nodded your head, voice stuck in your throat, and let her kiss you. Her lips had been slightly chapped, but still soft, and she’d tasted like the Lavender Lemonades she’d had at dinner, those slender fingers coming up to play on the back of your neck.

That was how it had all started.

-

Heejin was hard to figure out. One minute, she’d tell you that she loved you or she’d grab your hand and hold it in public, and then the next, she’d laugh and call you her best friend. You never knew what she was actually thinking. Sometimes, you wondered if she did it all on purpose. How could she really not know what she was doing? But she always gave you such a sweet, innocent smile, making you doubt yourself.

She was a sweet girl. There was no way she’d lead you on. Not on purpose.

Right?

-

At first, it had only been when the two of you were tipsy. After parties, or after nights out together. It was stumbling into one of your apartments, laughing and grasping at each other without a care in the world, smelling of alcohol. Those nights always ended with her lips on yours, her hands tangled in your hair, and her eyes hooded, staring into yours and driving you crazy.

When it was just drunken make-outs, you were fine. Sure, the smell of her lingered on your sheets and on your clothes and in your head, and sometimes you’d wake up with a vivid picture of the night before playing in your head, but it was fine. It meant nothing. There were no feelings involved, it was just fun. You could face her again and know that it didn’t matter.

Then she started to hold your hand.

At first, you hadn’t thought much about that either. Friends held hands all the time, right? It left you flustered and nervous, but she meant nothing by it. It was just friendly.

It was when she pulled you down to kiss you and she didn’t taste like alcohol but like coffee and pastries, that you knew you were screwed. You couldn’t keep the feelings bottled up inside anymore, not when she was showing you affection sober. And now it hurt, because you knew she’d pull away and seconds later call you her friend.

But you couldn’t say no.

-

“(Y/N), look, I got us matching phone charms!” She smiled as she spoke, holding up two cute little characters dangling from a string. “A token of our friendship!”

Because you couldn’t do anything else, you smiled and accepted the charm she handed to you, looking down at its little winking face. “Thanks, I appreciate it.”

“Now everyone knows you’re mine,” she said, with a giggle and a wink, and your stomach twisted. You knew she didn’t mean it. “Aren’t they cute?”

“They are. Where did you get them?”

“This guy from my class took me to the aquarium.”

You raised your eyebrows. Felt your heart sink. “A date?”

“Yeah, I couldn’t say no.” She shrugged. “It was fun, but I think he knew at the end of it that I didn’t want him.”

“Oh.” So she’d gotten you a couple gift while out on a date with someone else. That didn’t settle well with you, but you said nothing. Because you knew you had no right to. Heejin wasn’t yours. She could go on dates if she wanted to. “Well, I’m glad you had fun.”

Heejin did this a lot. The amount of couple items she’d bought for the two of you was astounding. Your closet had plenty of matching sweaters and hoodies and shoes, and the two of you wore matching necklaces every day (at least, you were pretty sure she wore hers). But she acted like it was no big deal. This wasn’t the first time she’d bought matching items while on a date with someone else. It made you wonder if she was leading them on like she was with you.

“It would have been more fun if you were there.” She smiled as she spoke, reaching out to grab your hand, and you melted. You couldn’t be angry at her. Even if she always followed up that phrase with “because you’re my best friend!”

-

“I heard that Heejin went on a date the other day. Did the two of you break up?” Sooyoung was pretty and friendly, but the two of you weren’t close. You only knew her briefly, through your friend Jiwoo. So her question wasn’t that surprising. Even so, you couldn’t help but feel annoyed as you looked at her over your lunch. Was this what she’d invited you out to talk about?

“We were never a couple to begin with.”

“Really? But the two of you are, like, always together! You’re wearing a couple necklace right now. And Jiwoo said-.”

Your head snapped up. “Jiwoo said what?”

“She said that you liked her. So I just figured that the two of you were dating.” Her eyes were wide as she peered at you. “You’re seriously not?”

Even people around you had noticed. It didn’t help that Jiwoo had always known about your feelings for Heejin. With a sigh, you rubbed your face. “We’re seriously not together.” It hurt a bit to say, but you choked it out. “We’re just friends, Sooyoung.”

“Oh.” She looked like she wanted to say something more but she didn’t, pursing her lips instead. Even so, you knew what she was thinking.

She was confused. And honestly, so were you.

-

Eventually, it all began to build up inside you. The feelings, the secrets, the lies. They all grew and grew until your chest and shoulders felt heavy. Heejin occupied your thoughts at all hours of the day, and no matter how you tried, you couldn’t stop thinking about her. It was too much to handle. Too much to keep inside. Too much to keep quiet.

So one night, as the two of you sat on the couch, you let a little bit slip.

“Heejin, are we still just friends?”

She blinked, turning to look at you from where she was watching the movie, her eyes big. “Yes? What do you mean?”

Your heart shattered and you shook your head. “Nothing. It’s fine. I was just being silly.”

“Yes, you were. I’ll always be your friend.”

-

After that night, you found yourself avoiding Heejin, ignoring texts and calls and staying inside unless you had to go to work or to get groceries. You just couldn’t face seeing her again. Your heart hurt too much.

You knew it would probably hurt her. She was probably confused, wondering what she did wrong. But you still couldn’t bring yourself to pick up her calls or answer her questions. You were a coward, and you coped by ignoring the situation at hand.

After a few weeks of running and hiding, there was a knock at your door. And standing there when you opened it was Heejin. For a moment, you couldn’t breathe, just staring at her. It felt like it had been forever since you last saw her. She had her dark hair up into a ponytail, and her eyes were red. Like she’d just been crying.

It was the first time you’d seen her where she didn’t look perfect.

“You’ve been avoiding me.” She crossed her arms. “I’m not leaving until you tell me why.”

A million things ran through your head, and you found you were still afraid. Afraid of getting your heart broken, and afraid of ruining the friendship that you had with her. But you stepped aside anyway, letting her inside with your head hanging low.

“I’m sorry.”

“I want to know why.”

You bit your lip. This was it. You had no where else to run, no more lies to tell. You had to tell her the truth. “I was scared,” you said truthfully, not looking at her as you spoke. “I’ve liked you for a long time, Heejin. More than just as a friend. And it all got too much to handle. So I ran away. And I’m sorry that I didn’t tell you sooner but you always talked about how we were just friends. I couldn’t tell you.”

She was quiet for a moment. “You like me romantically? That’s why you ran away?”

“Yes.”

“You should have just told me. You dummy.” She let out a little half-sigh, half-sob, and you looked up to see her shaking her head. “I was so sure we were just friends because you never brought up anything. I kissed you and you acted like it was normal. I was so scared after that first kiss that you’d cut off our friendship, but you acted like nothing happened. So I just went along with it. I thought that you’d rather just be friends with benefits. I even tried to make you jealous but nothing worked so I thought you didn’t care about me that way!” She wiped at her eyes, and you panicked a little, grabbing the tissues and handing them to her.

“Don’t cry, please don’t cry. I’m sorry, I was dumb, I didn’t realize-.”

“You were dumb.” She sniffled. “But I still liked you. And I still like you now, even though I’m mad at you for disappearing on me like that.”

“I’m sorry,” you repeated, your shoulders drooping. Then what she’d said hit you. She still liked you. More than as a friend. She wasn’t going to break your heart.

“Do you understand now?”

“I do.” You nodded slowly. “We were really on different pages.”

“No kidding.” A little smile made its way onto her lips. “I’m so annoyed with you, but I can’t help wanting to kiss you.”

A flush made its way up your neck and cheeks, and you awkwardly cleared your throat. “Um, should we start over? Do this the right way?”

“What do you mean by that?”

“I mean.... Heejin, will you be my girlfriend?”

The smile widened. “Yes (Y/N), I will be your girlfriend. On one condition.”

“What’s that?”

“Promise me that you’ll never run away from me again.”

You were still a coward. But she held out her pinky finger, eagerness in her eyes, and you committed. For her, you’d become strong. “Never again,” you promised, locking your finger with hers.

“Can I kiss you now?” Still smiling, she moved to hold your hand instead, grasping you tightly, like she was still a little bit afraid. But so were you, just the tiniest bit. So you held onto her in return and nodded your head, diving into the deep end with her.

Maybe it would take a little bit of time to talk things through, and to mend the broken relationship. But things were looking up. The two of you were together. And you were happy with that.

[writershapeholeonthedoor]

Dino Gear - Supercop

Read at AO3

That day turned out to be one of the worst days in Lena Luthor’s life. And she had a lot of days were people tried to kill her, including her mother and her bother, she was kidnapped more times than she was comfortable with and she did pretty much looked like a walking target to whatever shit the universe decided to throw her away, but, pushing all of that to the side, that was one of the worst days in her life.

She woke up late, which was a first in her life, after staying awake until very very late talking with Kara over texts. Her friend seemed bored and with insomnia and kept texting her the most random things for hours, going from asking her silly questions like her favourite color to sending pics of animals she found cute. And, for a reason she would like not to adress in the moment, Lena had stayed up with her until her friend finally fell asleep – or at least until she took more than five minutes to text her again. So when her alarm went off at 6am like usual, she didn’t heard it.

Jess saw her basically running to her office two hours after she was supposed to be there, but she was gracefull enough not to mention it while informing Lena of all the things she had pushed on her schedule. Because of her delay, Lena had even more meetings to attend in the afternoon and she had a board meeting and so many meetings that, by the time she exited the last one, she had lost count of which one that was.

She also hadn’t eaten nothing all day. Literally. She was late for work so she had to skip breakfest, she was in a meeting during lunch and another meeting after that. Lena spent all afternoon talking with stubborn, blockhead, white male, and by the time she realized she still had to put some solid food on her body it was already too late to ask Jess to grab her something.

To top all of that - because what more did she needed really? – she had to stay until late at her office, trying to finish some reports and working on some things she had promissed Winn she would take a look at. Not to mention that, in her rush to make everything on time, she didn’t had time to talk with Kara all day, even if she saw that her best friend had texted her more than once through the day. By the time she called her driver, Lena’s head was feeling twice it’s size.

She wanted nothing more than take her uncomfortable clothes off and go to bed. She had a terrible migraine, her body was tired and honestly her bed was just too inviting in the moment.

Lena had managed to take a quick shower and put her old National City University hoodie, and was on her way to pour some wine to herself, when there was a knock on the door. Her heart jumped against her chest at the sudden loud sound in her quiet apartment, but the panic quickly soothe when her brain started to work. There was only one person that would be allowed to go up by security without her being informed before.

What exactly Kara was doing on her door at 00:14am was beyond her, but Lena knew it was better ask her than keep asking herself instead. She sighed, putting down the wine bottle, and started making her way to the door. Lena loved her friend, she really did, but she wasn’t in the mood to entertain her that night. Her head hurt and she was tired, and it wasn’t even wednesday yet.

She took a deep breath before opening the door, ready to break Kara’s excited little heart, but then she had to stop short on her tracks when she took in whatever her friend was wearing.

Her hand instantly flew to her mouth to hide her laugh behind her palm, but it was already too late by the look on Kara’s face.

“Special delivery for miss Luthor!” Kara exclamed in her most cheerful tone, raising her hand that was holding a plastic bag to show her that she had, indeed, something with her.

Lena shook her head, her hand dropping back to the door handle, her smile almost too big to be comfortable. “Please, tell me this isn’t happening right now.”  She said with a scoff.

Kara raised one eyebrow at her, but her smiley face was just too happy for it to stay like that for too long. “You like my dino gear, don’t you?” Her eyes moved up, clearly trying to look at the said clothing item, before coming back to stare at Lena with that bright glint on the blue orbs.

Lena looked at her friend from head to toe, still smiling, and quirked her eyebrows to what she saw. Kara’s bottom half was rather normal, just some old sneackers and a maybe too large grey hoodie pants with CatCo symbol on it, but her top half was something entirely different. She was using what had to be the ugliest sweater Lena had ever saw. It was a dark shade of blue, with a large green and yellow dinosaur on it, and it would have being an attrocity if she wasn’t looking so cute while wearing it. And, in her head, Kara was wearing a black cap with a green dinosaour being mounted by a green smiley alien, full with stars and planets around them and a fluffly coloured woolen ball on top. In the bottom, the phrase “Give me some space” was written in white and red, making everything even better.

Kara looked ridiculous, but, oh so cute. Especially with that easy smile of her and her face full of freckles around her nose that Lena could see thanks to the fact that her friend wasn’t wearing any make up.

“I heard you had a rough day.” Kara offered as an explanation, raising the bag again. “I thought I would show up to make you smile a little bit.” She wiggled her eyebrows and her cap moved along with it. “With kale to help me out.”

Lena couldn’t hold back anymore, she laughed openly now. “Jesus, Kara, you’re the best, I love you.” She shook her head again.

They hadn’t said it before, not even in a friendly way. They had said how much the other meant for each other, how much they cared, how far they would go for each other, but, for some reason, it felt different that time. Lena could hear in her own voice how blunt out honest she was when she spilled the words without thinking. She didn’t sounded like a thankful friend, no. She sounded like a in love fool, like her heart had just spit out of her mouth.

And apparently Kara had also realized it because all laugh and smile left her beautiful face when she stared back at Lena in shock. So Lena also stoped laughing, because clearly her friend was not amused anymore, and her heart started beating fast inside her chest, begging her to find a way to get out of the mess she dug herself and not ruin things for them, because having Kara as her friend was better than not having Kara at all.

“I, uh-“ Lena cleared her throat twice before she was able to speak again. “What’s in the bag?” She clinged visibly to her stupid question and clear attempt to find another thing to talk about.

But Kara wasn’t having it. “What did you just said?”

“What?” Not the best time to play dumb, Lena realized too late. Not the best way to get her out of that mess.

“You-“ Kara pointed at her with a shaking finger and wide eyes. “You said you- You said- You just...” Ok, so clearly she wasn’t the only one who had no idea what to say. “You said you love me.” Kara whispered the words almost in reverence.

Lena wanted to play dumb again, at least she would be able to buy her some time before having to answer the though questions, but she doubted that saying ‘No, I didn’t’ was going to sound any better than whatever crap she could come up with. Her brain was way too tired for that conversation to be happening.

So she went all the way around. “Yes, I did.” Lena crossed her arms in front of her chest, trying to embrace herself for the impact.

“Wow.” Kara whispered in awe while nodding along with it. “That’s some big news.”

“Kara, look, I’m sorry. I haven’t slept very well and I also didn’t eat anything all day, and I really want to go to bed, so...” It was the lamest excuse she ever gave anyone, but she couldn’t think straight when Kara was staring at her like that. It made her inside all mushy and warm, and it made her really nervous.

“I love you too.”

“What?”

“I love you too, Lena.” Kara repeated, her growing smile getting bigger and bigger by the second. “As like more than friends kind of love you.”

“You really do?” Lena never felt more nervous or hopefull in her entire life before and it showed on how low her voice became suddenly, the words barely audible for any human.

But Kara smiled at her again and, with a wink, said: “Well, I did used this thing in public, didn’t I?”

The CEO chuckled and shook her head. “To be fair, I think you would use it regardless.”

“That’s not the point here.” They shared a light moment where they both giggled like school girls about to kiss their crush, but suddenly Kara became very serious and she looked even more nervous than before.

“What?” It was ringing way too many bells inside her head and Lena didn’t liked it.

Kara’s eyes suddenly filled with tears and she looked down at her dirty sneakers so she wouldn’t have to see Lena’s reaction to what she was about to say. “I- Lena, I can’t do this, not without telling you the whole truth, it’s not fair with you and...”

“Kara.” Lena interrupted her gently. She hesitated only for a second before she reached out to grab Kara’s hand that wasn’t grasping the bag. The brunette coaxed her to come foward, but the blonde only followed her once she looked around and realized she was still literally standing in the hallway. “I think I know what...”

“I’m Supergirl.” Kara blurred out suddenly. She was still looking down, but after her outburst she looked up to meet the emerald eyes that made her feel so many things. Lena had raised her eyebrows, but she didn’t let go of her hand, so she took it as a good sign. “I’m Supergirl and I love you, Lena.” She stated, straightening her posture and stuffing her chest to give the impression that she was more confident than she really was.

Lena’s eyes softened and she took a step back, than another one, until she finally raised her other hand to push a stray of hair behind her ear, the touch almost making Kara combust in place. “I knew the first part, just for the record.” She claimed with a little amusement. “Quite hard to miss it. The rest is kind of surprising, not going to lie.”

“I really want to kiss you right now.”

“Kara, I don’t want you to take it the wrong way, really.” Lena paused and bit her bottom lip. For a second, the hero thought she was about to be rejected, but then she saw the corners of Lena’s mouth trembling slightly as she fought a smile. “But it’s really hard to take you serious when you’re wearing this hat and this sweater.”

Kara nodded and pretended to think for a second. “I can compromise with the hat, but I really like this sweater.”

Lena chuckled softly. “I think you look quite cute with it.” She raised both hands, using one to remove Kara’s Alien-Mounting-A-Dinosaur gear and the other one to brush the blonde curls away from her face. Her heart swell with love when Kara closed her eyes and leaned to her touch. “I will never say it again, so you better save this in your memory, but I did enjoyed the dino gear too. It made me smile.”

“That’s all I want.” Kara confessed as she leaned for their first kiss.

A week later, after Kara convinced Lena to a late walk through her block, people would see Lena using the dino gear while trying to convince Kara that she wasn’t cold enough to use the damn sweater.

[bisectionalbisexual]

Born to Hate, Made to Love

(Human AU)

Word count: 2,163

Pairings: Royality

TW: Angst, self-deprecating thoughts, body issues, food mention. (Let me know if I should add any!) 

Summary: Patton is a plus sized man who likes to dress more on the feminine side. He’s always been fascinated with cute sweaters and pastel colors, so when his new boyfriend Roman wants to take him clothes shopping, you’d think he’d be excited, right? Sadly that isn’t the case a Patton tries to cope with his body issues while struggling to keep it together in front of his newly found love.

~~~

“Be ready at five, K? We’ll grab dinner from the Food Court then go shopping!” Roman’s voice sang happily from Patton’s cell phone.

While Roman was excited, Patton was nervously fiddling with the hem of his old worn out shirt.

“Um, yeah,” he tried to match his boyfriend's enthusiasm, “yeah I’ll be ready. See you then.”

Patton hung up and shoved his phone into the pocket of his sweatpants, sighing as he sat on his couch. He had no idea how this evening was going to turn out, but all he could feel was his stomach twisting into knots at the thought of trying on his eccentric choices of clothing in front of his boyfriend Roman.

They had been dating for almost three months now, but every time Patton was with him it felt like their very first date. He was in constant fear of how Roman would react if he wore something that showed off his true silhouette, so instead, he opted for wearing baggy hoodies and loose pants whenever he saw his boyfriend. He couldn't risk Roman becoming disgusted once he saw Patton's body, grimacing when they hugged or even refusing to be near him.

In every relationship Patton has been in, he’s always been afraid that every single one of them has only settled for his body, never loved him for how he was.

“He has a great personality!”

“He’s not that big…”

“He’ll break you with how fat he is.”

Oh god, it was all too much, why was just a simple shopping date making him so worked up? 

“Maybe I should just cancel,” he thought out loud reaching for his phone.

Just as he opened his messages a text popped up from Roman.

‘Don’t forget your favorite headband! We’ll find something to match ;) <3’

Patton couldn’t help but smile after reading the light-hearted message. After a moment of thought, he felt the confidence he needed to go through with this date. With a tiny squeal of excitement, he hopped up from his couch to get dressed.

His wardrobe wasn’t as extensive as most people, but a few years back he was lucky enough to find some nice outfits to save for special occasions. This time Patton decided on some plain khakis and a teal sweatshirt with sparkly pink lettering saying “I believe in Mermaids” with a seashell border around the message. He ruffled his caramel curls a bit before sticking in a pink headband that had cat ears covered in glitter.

Patton smiled to himself in the mirror and gave a twirl, and just as he was feeling good about himself he heard knocking at his door.

“Must be five!” He exclaimed to himself as he ran to answer it, and there he was.

Roman, sweet handsome Roman stood in the doorway shamelessly wearing blue skinny jeans and a white tank top that delicately hugged his chiseled figure from under his red letterman jacket.

How was it that Patton got a man almost the complete opposite of him?

“Ready to go, Pattie Cake?” Roman greeted with a charming smile, extending his hand for Patton.

Patton gladly held onto his hand as he was led out of the apartment building with the biggest smile plastered on his face.

~~~

The drive to the mall was mostly silent as they both listened to the music booming from Roman’s sound system. Patton sat back comfortably watching out the window, that was until he got a glimpse of himself in the mirror. Suddenly, his posture straightened, sitting up with his head tilted slightly to try and get rid of his double chin. He felt the back of his neck heat up as he began worrying about every tiny detail of himself. At least he was until Roman rested his hand on Patton’s thigh.

“You excited?” He asked, keeping his eyes on the road as he drove.

Patton smiled to him and adjusted his glasses, “of course! I’m with you, Silly.”

“Aw,” Roman blushed, “you’re too sweet.” For a moment Roman took his focus away from driving so he could lean over giving Patton a quick peck on the cheek before turning his attention back to the road.

Patton giggled softly touching his flushed face with his sleeve, every bit of fear melting away with Roman’s simple little acts of affection.

~~~

Before the two of them knew it, they were at the mall wandering around the food court.

“What do you want, babe?” Roman asked pulling Patton closer to intertwine their fingers.

“I um- I’m not sure,” Patton chuckled breathlessly, “you pick.”

“Nope, your day, your choice,” Roman stated simply with a small shrug making Patton roll his eyes.

He had no idea what to pick, there were some food places that were exclusive to the Food Court, but then again there were some of Patton’s favorite shops there too. He hated being put on the spot like this, why did Roman have to be such a gentleman?!

“Hmm, are you okay with Subway?”

“Whatever you want,” Roman winked and pulled Patton into the line of people.

They ordered their food and sat down together once it was ready, each of them taking time to eat a little before sparking up a conversation.

“So…” Patton began, “where would you like to shop?”

Roman pondered the question for a moment as he took a sip of his Sprite.

“Hmm, well, I was thinking about Hot Topic. Looking past all the edgy stuff, I think there are some cute things in there you would like.”

Patton nodded with a small smile and once they were finished with their food Roman dragged Patton along by his hand.

They entered the store to be met with an intimidating but friendly enough worker folding shirts at the check-out counter. His plum colored bangs falling in his face on occasion, but he paused seeing the two enter and brushed them away.

“Hi there, how may I-” He was going to continue his regular “customer service” monologue, that was until he recognized the pair, “Roman? Pat?”

“Woah, Virgil?” Roman gasped and rushed up to the worker, “you work here?”

Virgil shrugged lightly and continued to fold shirts, “just my summer job for now. What can I do for you guys?”

“Well, Roman decided to take me clothes shopping today,” Patton said while he turned his head to look around the store.

Virgil inspected Patton, ultimately making him tense under his gaze as he worried the look was judgemental. Instead, Virgil nodded and pointed to the display in the corner of the store.

“To avoid all the angst, cute stuff is in the back.”

This made Patton giggle, “thanks, Virge.”

“No prob, Bob.”

“... It’s Patton.”

They all chuckled and Roman gave a wave as he led Patton to the colorful display. There were clothes, jewelry, headbands, and other such artifacts ranging from colorful Disney Princesses to dark DC Comics characters. It was obvious that Patton looked to the more light-hearted of the items, flipping through bracelets and necklaces that would catch his interest. 

Roman, however, was going through shirts that he thought Patton might like, and after a couple of minutes, he slapped a stack of different clothes into Patton’s arms.

“Here, go try these on.”

Before Patton could interject he was shoved over towards the dressing room and nearly placed inside while Roman waited outside the door.

Patton went through the clothes finding all of them quite cute, so he picked out his favorites and started trying them on.

First was a Lilo & Stitch tie-dye muscle top, Patton thought it was adorable with the happy Stitch image on top of the blue and white tie-dye with the stripe of purple. But when he tried it on he didn’t quite like what he saw in the mirror. Surprisingly enough, the tank had fit fine, he just didn’t like looking at his arms. All he saw were two ugly, pale blobs pressed against his torso, his pudge making them almost look disfigured as he relaxed his shoulders. The image made him grimace and he quickly pulled off the shirt.

Luckily there weren't any more tank tops, but the graphic tees in the pile brought up a whole new set of problems.

There was one shirt that hugged his tummy a little too tight, another one felt like the sleeves were squeezing his arms making him fear that he would rip the hem. He tried on a plain pastel pink knit sweater, but that one was much too short, barely pulling down past his stomach. Next was a blue t-shirt with a sketch if the lovely princess Cinderella, it was long enough to cover his bottom, but it was lying in such a way that made his love-handles stand out much to his dismay.

The rest of the shirts were a similar story, and by the time Patton was finished, there was a tight ache in his chest and tears stinging his eyes.

“How’s it going in there? I wanna see you.”

Roman’s sweet voice chimed in from behind the door but Patton couldn’t take it, all he wanted to do was go home. He wanted to go home and just bawl his eyes out. Patton was such a kind soul, he tried to see the bright side of things but when it came to his body he just couldn’t, he hated feeling this way.

The dressing room door creaked open and Roman was met with a sad sight. Patton’s arms her crossed against his stomach hugging himself as he held his head down, notably wearing the same outfit he came in with.

“Hey, what’s up?” Roman asked concerned, “you didn't like any of them?”

Patton shook his head and spoke softly, “I just wanna go home…”

“Home? But we haven’t even bought anything!”

Roman was confused, hurt to see his boyfriend in such a state as Patton walked passed him. Virgil noticed this and came over.

“Is something wrong?”

Patton sniffled and wiped his nose on his sleeve, “nothing fit, okay?! Nothing ever fits…”

A small whimper left his lips and he just couldn’t take it anymore. Roman tried to go after him only for Virgil to hold him back.

“Hold on, hold on, just give him a minute.”

~~~

Patton ran to Roman’s car and jumped inside, tearing his cute headband off and pulling his sweatshirt off over his head leaving him in a plain blue t-shirt. He promptly shoved his face into the sweater and let the tears flow as he sat under the hot summer sun.

Very little time passed before Roman came to the driver's side and opened the door, his heart aching to see Patton in such a state.

“Pattie Cake?” He asked gently as he got in the car, “it’s okay, I’m sure we’ll find something that works.”

“You don’t understand,” Patton cried, “I’ve never had a good shopping experience, Ro, never! I’m so sorry I let you drag me to this awful place…”

“Hey, I thought you liked the mall.”

“Sure, when I’m just getting things and not receiving those judgemental looks. Clothes shopping is different. I’m sorry.”

“Don’t be sorry, darling, just talk to me.”

Roman reached out and placed a hand on Patton’s shoulder prompting his rant.

“I don’t know why you like me… I’m gross and ugly. If you saw my body I’m sure you’d feel the very same. Hate is such a strong word… But I hate myself! No matter how hard I try to look at it, all I’m going to ever be is this disgusting blob! I’m never able to find anything I like, I can only see if it fits, and if it fits then I wear it,” Patton just kept getting more and more worked up, causing him to pause and take a deep breath, finally looking over to Roman. “I wanna express myself, so I wear makeup and pretty headbands, but my clothing?” He shook his head. “I loved those shirts you picked out but… I’m sorry I’m just too fat to wear them.

Fat. The word hissed from his lips, sounding like poison. This one word caused Patton so much pain but he shows no hesitation when referring to himself as such.

“Patton, darling, why are you so hard on yourself?” Roman rested his hand on his cheek wiping away his tears, “gross? Ugly? Never!” He wrapped his arms around Patton and hugged him tightly. 

Patton was tempted to hug back, but he just felt so numb after his fit of emotions.

Roman sighed and turned his head to kiss Patton’s cheek, “my dear you are handsome, gorgeous, beautiful, absolutely magnificent! Whatever you prefer!” He pulled away and lifted Patton’s chin ever so slightly, “I love you… I love you just as you are, and you should too.”

Patton pouted trying to avoid his gaze, “doesn’t change the fact that I don’t…”

“Then,” Roman began, “you can take the steps to change that, and I’ll support you every step of the way.”

He put on a comforting smile then perked up remembering the trip to Hot Topic prior, “until then, Virgil wasn’t gonna let me leave unless I bought something, so here.” Roman pulled out a gift card and handed it to Patton, “he told me that they provide more sizes on the online store, you can get whatever you like.”

It was then Patton wiped away his tears and smiled, looking down at the gift card then to his loving boyfriend, “Thank you, Roman, so so much.”

He leaned forward and gave Roman a quick kiss before sitting back in his seat, “it means a lot.”

“I say,” Roman started up the car and put his seatbelt on, “we go get Starbucks and head back to your place. Then- only if you’d like to- you can come to the gym with me and Logan tomorrow.”

Patton listened to Roman’s plan as he clicked on his seatbelt then reached to hold his hand once he began driving.

“I think I’d like that.”

~~~

A/N: UUUUGGGGHHH I actually teared up writing this, because Patton is me, plain and simple. These are actual things I've said to myself or have been said to me. This single lady doesn't necessarily have a Roman but I do have a support system and I'm glad to say that no matter what, Big is Beautiful. Until next time, Lovies ;)

[stillness-in-green]

Salt-Sweet Curse

A wild departure from my usual fandom interests, but what can I say - the villain drama in My Hero Academia is really doing it for me right now. For MerMay, and also for @codenamesazanka, whose post about this really inspired me, have some Shigaraki and Toga mermaid AU. 

Toga Himiko had a new target, and he wasn’t exactly her usual type. He walked around town slouched and hidden away in a black hoodie, just radiating ‘societal outcast,’ while she preferred people with more cheer. Killing someone who’d just die with an attitude like, “Yeah, it figures,” would be the absolute worst! Also, he smelled bad. Like, really bad. But she only knew that because she’d passed him by close enough to see the other thing, the one that caught her interest—his eyes were red. Really, true ruby red, and that was enough to have her tailing him for hours, because she wanted to know if his eyes really did match the color of blood as closely as she thought they would.

He was a wily one, though! He must’ve clued in that he was being followed, because his shoulders had gone tight and hunched, and he kept looking over his shoulder, those gorgeous eyes scanning the crowd. She was a wily one, too, though, and his eyes hadn’t landed on her yet (though she wouldn’t hate it if they did—patience, Himiko-chan, patience).

She saw her chance when thunder rumbled through the open air, and the crowds of people paused and then resumed walking, all a two-step faster. The boy—older than her, but still not quite a man, she didn’t think—stopped at the mouth of an alley and looked up at the clouds. They were quite the picture, an impressionistic panorama in shades and strokes of grey, layers on layers. The darkest ones were piling in from the west, though, a haze of rain already visible on the horizon. She could see the consternation on the boy’s face, frustration visible even from her safe distance. He scratched at his neck and turned his head down, pulling his hoodie tighter and looking around. Didn’t you bring an umbrella today, silly thing? Toga giggled at the thought, her own umbrella pink and playful, still unopened over her shoulder.

Eventually, the boy headed for the bridge. How convenient! When he didn’t go up over the top, but rather down towards the riverbank, she even wondered if it was a call-out. Well, that suited her fine. He ducked up between the pylons and out of sight and she decided to give him a few minutes, watching the school kids and stray fishermen along the bank pack up and trail off towards home as the rain came in.

Once the embankment was clear, she gave her umbrella a spin, sluicing water in every direction, then closed it and tossed it to the ground. Right away, the rain began to soak through her hair and clothes, and she stifled a laugh as she ran down the slope towards the cover of the bridge.

In the dim and damp, she felt the weight of someone’s eyes—someone’s gorgeous red eyes—but the boy wasn’t immediately visible and she didn’t search for him. Instead, she made a show of examining herself with a disgruntled expression before wringing out her sleeves and kicking loose water off of her shoes. She shook her head and rubbed her ears, dislodging a bit of trickling wet, gave the pouring rain a half-hearted glare, and finally straightened her shoulders to start looking around.

Discarded bits of paper and cigarette butts littered the lee beneath the bridge, roadwork signs for the thoroughfare overhead stacked in haphazard piles in amongst the pylons. Graffiti slogans marked the cement walls on the opposite side of the river. The rain sounded a steady drumming, mixing in with the lapping of the river, and the air whispered cool and dark on her cheeks.

She turned, gaze scanning up the near walls, and saw him again at last, a black lump tucked up in the highest recesses of the gloom.

“Oh!” She raised a hand to her mouth in surprise, then her voice in greeting. “Hello, up there! I’m sorry; I didn’t realize anyone else was here!”

He didn’t move, features indistinguishable in the shadows.

“It looks like the rain’s gonna keep going for a while,” she called, and started up in his direction—no sense giving him a chance to turn her down. “Do you mind if I come up?”

If he responded, he didn’t do it loud enough to make himself heard over the rain, so she clambered up towards the upper recesses where the cement embankment met the underside of the bridge. The boy, she saw as she neared him, sat curled up with a ragged-looking backpack pulled up over his head, his arms wrapped around his knees, taking up as little space as possible.

Are you scared? she thought, and bit the inside of her lip, fighting back her grin.

“I said no,” he growled when she stopped a few feet away from him. His voice was hoarse, a groan like buckling metal.

“Oh—sorry, I couldn’t hear anything over all that.” She waved blithely at the downpour and gave him an apologetic smile, dipping her head in contrition. A drop of water squeezed out of a chink in the concrete above her, plopping down atop her head, which she ducked down further, twisting it to look up at him sideways. “Is it dry up there? I just need somewhere to wait until it dies down a bit.”

He edged away from her minutely as she closed the distance and plopped herself down beside him with no further fanfare. Up close, the stink hit her again—so profound it passed out of the realm of bad and into some farther territory of personalized, body odor so layered that she couldn’t even pick out the usual things like “sweat” or “blood” or “piss” or “beer.” He just smelled like himself—something sour and penetrating and old. She itched to ask him about it, but a schoolgirl like herself should be polite, so instead she rummaged in her pockets, fingers skimming over her switchblade to land on her cellphone.

She pulled it out and squinted at it, swiping the lockscreen away and pulling down the status bar to look at—and sigh at—the moisture warning. “Darn… Cellphone’s wet, too. Do you have one I could use to call home? I’m afraid to use mine when it’s wet like this…”

“No.” He clipped the word out like a snip of scissors. Her sidelong glance found a tight frown on his face—he was so thin, protruding cheekbones and a jawline so sharp it was a wonder it hadn’t broken his skin, and his hair was the color of an old man’s, gray-white, while still having a shaggy thickness that couldn’t be all matted grime. Two old, small scars marked his face, short cuts that lay over his right eye and the left side of his cracked, dry lips. Her heart skipped a beat—his eyes were just as red as she remembered.

Patience, Himiko-chan! Oh, but you’re making it so hard…! She racked her brain for the right thing to say—he was obviously some kind of runaway, maybe from home, maybe from the police, so the usual ‘So what do you do for a living?’s and ‘So where do you go to school?’s wouldn’t work.

“So…” She busied herself fiddling with the edge of her sweater. “How long do you think the rain’s gonna last? I can’t believe I forgot an umbrella today…”

“Too damn long,” the boy groused, eyes flicking out to the rain, and back to her again.

“Yeah.” She huffed a short laugh. “I thought maybe I could beat it home, but…

“So… Do you live around here?” she went on when he didn’t take the bait to ask where she lived or volunteer a story of his own. Such a puzzlebox! She poked at her cellphone screen, adjusting the lighting so she could better see the moving outlines of their reflections, the boy’s and hers.

“I live around,” he answered, voice flat, and oh, there was only so much stonewalling a girl could take!

“It’s just that,” she said hurriedly, stumbling a bit on the words. “Your eyes are so pretty.” He stiffened beside her—at the compliment? The forwardness? “I’ve never seen anything like them. And your hair’s white, too—are you albino? Is that too rude?”

He’d gone silent, an emotional shift Toga felt like a barometric drop, and was drawing back from her—dangerous, it felt dangerous, how exciting!

The next few seconds happened very fast.

“Can I take a picture? Smile!” She held up the phone in front of them, her thumb tapping over the screen to pull up the camera app. She grinned at the rictus of dismay and the flare of anger in his eyes; he uncurled from his hunch to reach over, faster than she’d been expecting, to grab at her wrist.

Her other hand, unnoticed, slipped down to her pocket again and closed on a well-worn lacquer handle.

“I don’t want to be in your fucking selfie, you—!”

His words cut off, his hand—chilly, so cold and it wasn’t even autumn yet—tightening reflexively as his eyes widened.

She giggled and hit the snapshot button on the phone, capturing his dumbstruck expression as he looked down at the knife between his ribs.

“What”—he wheezed, the breath rattling in his lungs—“the fuck.”

Toga pealed with laughter and pushed herself away from the swipe of his other hand. She left the knife in him and he didn’t try to get up, blood already soaking a darker circle through his hoodie.

“You know this doesn’t work, right?” he hissed, curling up around the wound.

“What, stabbing?” she drawled, cupping her cheeks with her hands. What a delightfully strange boy she’d found. “Stabbing works on everyone, silly.”

“…So you’re just a random psycho? Just my luck,” he mumbled, glaring up at her—those eyes, those eyes, she just had to know!

“Your eyes really are so, so pretty!” she cooed, ducking back in towards him, pulling a handkerchief out of her pocket. “How’d you ever get eyes like that? Your mother? Your father?”

He tried to bat her away, but with all the blood he was losing, there was no strength in his arms, at least not enough to stop her from pressing the cloth to his wound.

“What the hell,” he whispered, and coughed wetly. This close, she could smell blood mixed in with rainwater. “Gonna patch me up now?”

“You’re so snide even when you’re bleeding out,” Toga giggled. “That’s so unique. What’s your name?”

He gave her a disbelieving look and coughed again, the force of it rattling his thin frame. She pouted at his lack of response, wondering briefly if he had an ID she’d find when all was said, done and drank, but the wet heat at her fingertips wrested the thought away from her. Her breath hitched in excitement and she pulled her handkerchief away, the cloth now stained a dark, dark red, brighter around the edges.

She brought it up to her face, breathing in the smell—blood, yes, and something salty and stale, maybe some of his sweat, or a musk of fear that didn’t show on his face but couldn’t lie through physiology. She opened her mouth, extending the tip of her tongue, and—

He tackled her, out of nowhere, and there was his strength, sudden and desperate, like the dying man he’d been all along but was only just now thinking to act like. His hands wrapped around her wrists like claws, like wire cables, his breathing gone deep and guttural, and his eyes, when she looked up to meet them, shone bright and desperate and furious.

“No,” he snarled, pinning her arms to the grass. She laughed, delighted.

“Yes!” she cheered in reply and raised one foot to kick them into a roll down the hill. They tumbled together, and in the tangle of his body and the ground, she managed to get a hand on her knife and wrench it loose. He cried out, short and sharp, and then they spun to a stop at the edge of the lee, the raindrops hard and heavy where they gathered, ran and fell. He cursed and jerked away from her, scrabbling backwards towards shelter, and she was left with the knife, which wouldn’t have long before the rain washed it clean.

She wasted no more time, bringing the blade to her mouth and carefully, exquisitely carefully, wrapping her lips and tongue around the metal. Oh. Ohhhh!

The usual taste of iron hit her mouth first, laving over her tongue like juice from a burst peach, but there was more there, more, a salt like sweat, like brine, like nothing she'd ever tasted in blood—that smell from before, was that this saltiness, his blood and not his sweat at all?

I'm going to keep you, she thought, delirious, nicking her own tongue in her haste to suck down more of his flavor and moaning at the taste of his blood of mingling with her own, brackish copper and red iron. I'm going to drag you off somewhere and keep you, I can't get enough of this, oh, why’d I go for the ribs first, oh please don't die from that!

The sound of cloth ripping brought her back to herself, and she found a dull and distant pain waiting for her, swelling in her ankles and her feet. She looked down at herself hazily—Did I twist something going downhill? That would suck!—and blinked, slow and owlish, at the sight at her shoes, bloated like the store had overstuffed them with paper.

And then the pain grew sharper, knifing up through her legs. She gasped in shock, dropping her knife and curling up on herself, patting at her knees, hunting for broken bones, red cuts, anything at all to explain why her ankles felt like they were breaking, feet twisting in on themselves like wilting flower petals.

The boy laughed, low and harsh, and she looked up at him, eyes wide. He stared back from under the lip of the bridge, ruby eyes bright and hateful, and an enormous fish tail, dull silver and speckled with red scales, lashed in the flensed remains of his jeans.

“Congratulations. Now you’re cursed just like me.”

And then the red hurt in her legs rose in a song like the swing of a knife, and she had no ear for any other melody.

When the pain finally receded, she looked up to find the boy giving her a long, narrow stare. He looked from her and her new tail—her new tail, her new tail—up to the empty road atop the embankment, and came to some unspoken decision.

“We can’t fix this here,” he told her bluntly. “Come on.” And then he slipped off his backpack, his hoodie and the unspeakably stained shirt beneath it, cramming them both inside the backpack. Reshouldering it, he began dragging himself down to the riverbank. His fins flipped and flopped as he shifted the bulk of his tail one heave after another, his gaze fixed on the dancing surface of the water. A trail of blood smeared the grass behind him, thinning and running in the pouring rain that slicked his hair to his skull and almost, almost drowned out the pained hiss of his breathing.

So I guess stabbing really doesn’t work?

She didn’t hesitate. The pain still lingered in her new extremity, but that was nothing, really—not compared to the ruby-eyed boy who’d just changed her in a way more profound than any of her previous crushes, and whose surface she’d clearly only just scratched, judging by his sudden turn-around from actively rebuffing her to inviting her to follow him. And there was all that weird talk about her “just” being a random psycho—as opposed to what? So who knew how many more delicious secrets he could be keeping?

It wasn’t like she was going to get up and walk somewhere else, anyway.

She picked up her knife, folded it back into its casing, and tucked it carefully into her bra, where it pressed a reassuring two inches of cold solidity against the curve of her flesh. She looked thoughtfully at the mess where her lower half was just a minute ago—burst shoes (no wonder it’d hurt so much) and just shreds of her knee-socks, but her skirt had just rucked itself up about her waist and was maybe salvageable. She unfastened it and tried to slide it down, flexing the curve of her tail—bright yellow with two curving arcs of red like blood spray, and very beautiful, for all that he called it a curse—but the tail was so long, much longer than her arms, and she couldn’t quite sit upright anymore, and—

A splash sounded from the river, nearly swallowed up by the rain, and then the boy barked at her, “I said come on!”

Toga sighed and followed. Probably this’d be easier in the water.

It took her longer than she’d have liked to get there, and clearly longer than the boy liked, from the way his eyes kept darting between her and the embankment and periodically up to the bridge. She was excited, and her arms weren’t weak, but the tail was heavy and unfamiliar. When she finally reached the edge, the boy planted one hand against the bank and reached out of the water to wrap his other hand firmly around the base of her tail. Unceremoniously, he dragged her in.

She yelped a laugh, startled but unfazed by the cold, and let herself sink. She was a mermaid now, and she’d seen enough cartoons to know how that worked. Down here she’d be able to get her skirt off better, and maybe look at the boy’s wound again, taste it in the water of the canal, see how blood smelled when she breathed in through—

She didn’t have gills. She realized that as her lungs expanded, foolhardy and confident for their very first mermaid breath, bringing water surging up her nose and down her windpipe, heavy and cold and tasting like lead.

She thrashed in the water, arms flailing—the boy was nowhere in her reach, but she smacked an arm against the bank and clawed at it, dragging herself halfway out of the water again, choking, gagging, instinctive tears of panic blurring her vision. The rain went on drumming down against her shoulders, leaving her sweater a sopping wet weight against her back, and the water she heaved up on the shore tasted, at last, a little, like a curse.

By the time they stopped for the day, a long and exhausting swim later, the boy’s wound had mostly closed, a red welt between two of his ribs. She had no clue how long it had taken—all her attention had been used up just figuring out how to swim and steer with one huge new muscle in place of her legs while also getting her breathing down such that she just came up for air when she needed it.

“It’s not here to turn your life into a sparkly magic fairy tale,” the boy told her when she complained about the learning curve. “It’s a curse.”

“How do we fix it?” she asked, curled up on the low, silty shore next to him. His backpack and her skirt and sweater hung over a tree root curling out from the bank and down to the water—not really out of the water to dry, just enough so they didn’t float away. Above, the clouds had started to clear off, and the sunset turned all those chiaroscuro grays into scarlet and gold and deep iris-purple.

“Hell if I know,” he said, brisk and derisive. He was even thinner without the hoodie, all sharp edges and dark hollows, like a pencil sketch. “If you didn’t want to get caught up in it, you shouldn’t have sucked my blood off your knife, you freak.”

“Your blood was delicious; it was totally worth it.” She grinned at his expression and rolled onto her back, stretching and swishing her tail back and forth in the shallow depths. “But I was talking about what you meant before. Back in town, you said ‘We can’t fix this here.’ So where do we fix it?”

“…The sea,” he allowed with a grunt after a few sullen beats. “You have to submerge in the sea.”

“And what triggered it to begin with?” she asked, curious.

“The rain,” he answerd, rolling his eyes. “But any water’ll do it, when you’re on land.”

“Wait, but what about when I need a drink?”

“Get used to booze.”

“I’m underage,” she pointed out gamely, though something nagged at the back of her mind.

The boy snorted, sharp and more bitterly sarcastic than she’d ever seen on a human face—insomuch as you could really call him human. “Yeah, you’re gonna have to get over that pretty quick, too.”

“What does that—wait, any water—is that why you smell so bad?” The words came out in a delighted shriek as she rolled onto her front, propping herself up on her elbows. “Because you can’t bathe?”

He scowled at her, but she was beginning to think that was just his default expression, disdain clear in the angle of his chin and the little scrunch of his nose.

“It is, isn’t it?” She dissolved into laughter, shoulders shaking. “Do you even try, like, body spray or baby powder or something? Maybe just wiping the grime off sometimes? Changing clothes once a week?”

“Yeah, see how well that works around the six month mark,” he sneered. “Or the six year mark.”

Her eyes went round as she took in the enormity of the thought—oh, this was going to take some work. But then, maybe she could just try the youkai life sometimes, living in deep rivers and picking off cute boys from the countryside—she’d never even met a cute countryside boy, only seen them on TV. That could be fun.

“Hey, what’s your name?” she asked, focusing back in on her companion. “If you don’t tell me, I’m going to start calling you Stinky, just so you know.”

He snorted again, eyeing her sidelong, but after a moment—and oh, she couldn’t wait until she’d dug into him deep enough to figure out what he was thinking when his eyes went all hard and calculating like that—answered her with, “Shigaraki.”

“I’m Toga Himiko,” she told him with a broad smile. “Let’s be friends from now on.”

[dogwooddivinity]

LAX -> LHR

*My insomniac brain hit on the idea of a text fic using seat to seat messaging on an airplane last week, and this little bit of nonsense fell out.*

Seat 3D: I'm sorry, I'm trying to figure out if this is the right person. Did you by any chance trip over a black bag on your way through first class?

Seat 39A: Yes? Can I ask why you're asking?

3D: It was my bag.

39A: Oh, well I'm very sorry.

3D: No worries, it's only a bag.

3D: Can I ask your name handsome stranger?

39A: Handsome? It's Remus.

3D: I know what I saw. I'm Sirius.

3D: I'll jog your memory. Shoulder length black hair, grey hoodie, nice ass.

39A: Not sure how I would have been in a position to notice that last one, but I'll take your word for it.

39A: And, the memory jogging was not required. It's not like you have a face I'm going to easily forget.

3D: It didn't seem like you'd recognized me.

39A: I didn't. Should I have? I just meant that you're gorgeous. Hard to forget that.

3D: I'm gorgeous? Why thank you, Remus.

3D: And yes, most people I meet already know who I am.

39A: No need to thank me for the truth, Sirius, but I'll admit I feel a bit silly. I spend most of my time holed up in an observatory, please put me out of my misery and tell me why I'm supposed to recognize you...

3D: Hold on, I'm sending something to you. It should arrive in a minute.

3D: Most people recognize me from the movies they've seen me in.

39A: Thank you for the champagne. And in a real glass. Things really are fancy up there, aren't they?

39A: I'm not sure you're making friends with the flight attendants though, the people around me are now asking why they haven't been brought champagne.

3D: I think I'm safe. The flight attendants are the ones who helped me find you.

3D: You managed to slip away before I could talk to you and I sent them to find the man in the blue sweater, with the adorable curls, and the beautiful eyes.

3D: It turns out my description was spot on because they found you in minutes.

39A: You're ridiculous and I'm blushing.

39A: As for not recognizing you, the last movie I saw I had to be driven to by my father. I wasn't joking about the observatory.

3D: So, what do you do then, Remus?

3D: Oh, wait, do you have your phone handy?

39A: Yes, why?

3D: I've just set you up with WiFi.

3D: Just click on the link I sent and use the password SiriuslySexy

39A: Clever password. Done.

3D: Now we can move this off the screen that your row mates can all read.

39A: Do you mean the ones that are leaning in to get a better look? Yes. I'd appreciate that.

39A: Alright, I'm on my phone now.

3D: You've really never seen one of my movies?

3D: I'm legitimately excited about that.

39A: Without knowing what movies you've been in couldn't be sure, but I'm being honest when I say I haven't seen a new movie in more than a decade.

3D: Wow!

3D: Tell me more about this observatory.

3D: Oh! Wait! Also tell me, are you staying in London for a while or is this plane ride all I get of you?

39A: I'm actually moving back to London. I've been in California for the last three years doing research at the Goldstone Observatory and now I'm coming back to teach full time.

3D: So you're an astronomer?

39A: An astrophysicist, actually. Without getting too far into the weeds, my research focus is the change in the rate of expansion of the known universe over time.

3D: Impressive.

3D: What's your full name, Remus?

39A: Full and complete? Dr. Remus John Lupin.

3D: Dr? I like it. I'm Sirius Orion Black. Feel free to Google me and find out the names of all those movies you've never seen.

39A: Wow. Apparently I've been living under a rock? You've made nearly thirty movies. And are really, really famous?

39A: Oh, my God!

3D: What? Are you reading gossip rags? Don't. The lies they come up with aren't even interesting.

39A: No. That was the sound of me doing an image search.

39A: I don't understand why you are talking to me?

3D: I don't know, Remus, but I just watched the first five minutes of your Intro to String Theory lecture at UC Berkeley and I had to turn it off because the combination of being able to see you while also hearing THAT VOICE, is too much for me to manage.

39A: I don't even know what to say to that so I'm going to stick with thank you?

39A: You never told me what you're doing in London.

3D: I live there. I mean, I get pulled around quite a bit to film, but my home is in London.

3D: Are you looking forward to teaching? I always thought I might like teaching, although I never did much like teachers. The arrogance of adolescents, I guess. Always thinking you could do better.

39A: I am actually. Teaching is good for me. It's easy for me to get pulled far enough into my research that I go weeks without seeing sunlight or talking to other people. When you're teaching, you can't do that.

3D: I can understand that. People are often surprised to find out that, in my real life, I'm actually pretty introverted.

3D: Most of what they see is the public me. It is good for selling out theatres, but it's also exhausting to maintain.

39A: So these pictures of you in jeans that must have been painted on at your last premier are not the real you? I'm disappointed.

3D: Oh, no. That is very much the real me ;)

3D: But there, on the red carpet, that's more of an act than anything else. The clothes I'm good with, it's the glad handing and the needing to be constantly excited to be there that I can't stand.

39A: For the record, I'm also good with the clothes. ;)

3D: You know that I can find pictures of you too, right?

3D: I've got one here of you at a dinner celebrating a major gift to your department. Looks like I'm not the only one who cleans up well.

39A: That night was awful. The family that gave us the money was terrible and we were all told we had to be especially nice to them. It was the longest four hours of my life.

3D: Well, at least you looked incredible while you did it.

39A: I wish I hadn't because I spent the night having to avoid the donor's eldest daughter after she decided her and I were going to be 'very good friends'.

3D: That sounds awful.

39A: Indeed.

39A: Sirius, is there a reason why the flight attendant has just come and taken my bag?

39A: While cheeky, her wink wasn't particularly informative.

3D: Why don't you come up here and see?

[lonelypond]

IDOL PROTECTION PROGRAM: S-H-O-P-P-I-N-G

Love Live, NicoMaki, 2.5K

Nico was sitting at her desk. Nozomi and Eli’s ten year old twins were staying with at the Kurosawa household while their parents took a quick trip to Russia to visit Eli’s mom. Alisa had driven them down and stayed for a couple of days to enjoy the beach, but now Nico and Maki were on Vik and Teddy patrol alone, and it was tiring. Fortunately, Dia had just started a new historical fiction so she was reading and not wandering. The Koizumi-Hoshizoras were coming down on the weekend and a beach volleyball tournament was planned so it was a matter of keeping the active and diabolically inventive Ayase twins occupied until then.

“Aunt Nico?” Vik’s gravelly voice broke Nico’s concentration so the semi retired Idol looked up with a smile.

“What’s up?”

“Can you take me shopping?” Vik, Eli and Nozomi’s oldest child by 2 minutes, seemed hesitant, pulling on the brim of a NTV Beleza cap. Its shadows kept Nico from reading an expression.

“Sure.” Nico closed her laptop, “What do you need?”

….Vik glanced back, at the open door. Nico grabbed her wallet, “Do you want to tell me on the way?”

Vik nodded, shoulder tension easing slightly, but not quite smiling, brim still blocking Nico’s view.

Maki had taken Ruby and Teddy down to the beach, to teach Teddy how to use Maki’s latest camera setup so Nico assumed she could just text her wife with the change of plan but then Ruby barrelled into her as Nico was grabbing her sunglasses and scarf, “Mommy!”

Nico picked up her youngest daughter in a huge hug, curious as to where the other redhead at the center of her life had wandered to...Dia came by that habit honestly…Ah, Maki had opted for the sneak attack, suddenly behind Nico, arms sliding around her waist and a lips landing quick kiss on the top of Nico's dark hair, “Missed you, Nico-chan.”

“You mean you got hungry.” Nico squeezed Maki’s clasped hands.

Maki laughed and picked Nico and Ruby up to twirl them, “Maybe.”

Nico sidestepped out of her wife’s embrace, still holding Ruby, “Well, you’re going to have to take you and the beach crew out somewhere, Maki-chan. Vik and I have a shopping emergency to attend to.”

Maki’s face started to fall but a slight shake of Nico’s head caught her attention and she raised an eyebrow, which Nico responded to with an nearly imperceptible tilt of the head toward Vik.

Maki switched from mopey to flirty accusatory in a blink, “Oh good, fish tacos with fresh tomatoes it is! Let’s go Ruby.” Maki held out a hand for her daughter, then raised her eyebrows at Nico….”you never cook that for me, Nico-chan.”

“‘S too easy for Nico, I prefer a challenge.”

“Shopping.” Ruby insisted, clinging to Nico. “Pretty.”

Nico turned to Vik, smoothing Ruby’s red curls, “Do you mind, Vik? Ruby’s very good when she’s helping her mom pick out clothes, right Ruby?”

Ruby nodded earnestly.

“‘s’ok, I guess. Ruby’s cool.” Vik shuffled, hands in pockets, green eyes on the ground, long blonde ponytail bobbing slightly at the back of her ball cap. Nico was suddenly reminded so strongly of a too shy Eli.  Teddy's hair was shorter, but still blonde.

“There, that’s settled. Ruby and Nico are cool enough to go shopping; Maki and Teddy can take dorky pictures of fish tacos all afternoon.”

Vik giggled. Maki leaned over to kiss Nico, “See you later, love.”

“Save me a slice of whatever you order for dinner. And don't forget we're watching the game.”

Maki grinned, gave Nico a thumb’s up, and loped off to wherever she’d left Teddy and Dia.

“Let’s go,” Nico glanced at Vik, “Numazu here we come.”

Not quite the thrill of Tokyo, but Nico hoped it would have whatever it was Vik needed.

######################

They drove in the Nico-mobile for awhile, before Vik spoke again, glancing to where Ruby was nodding off in the back seat. “Can you keep a secret?” Vic pounded out a rhythm on the dashboard, “Not from Aunt Maki, but from my moms…”

“Is something wrong?” Nico made sure to sound more calm than curious.

“Nah.” Vik shrugged, voice breaking again, from nervousness or puberty Nico wasn’t sure, “They’ll just get excited and make a big fuss. Momo would be crying…”

“Eli is a crier.” Nico agreed.

“I know. It’s crazy embarrassing.” Vik snorted, with the casual disrespect children have for their parents’ sensitivities, “Momma bakes her a chocolate cake for her birthday or their anniversary and it’s tears all over the place.”

Nico was surprised Nozomi hadn’t told her about this to tease Eli, but one did get rather protective of one’s wife. She’d never tell Nozomi about some of Maki’s more endearing quirks.

“So what are we shopping for?” They were nearly at Numazu.

“I...I” Vik’s hands balled into fists, “want to try a sundress.”

Nico smiled, “Then I know just the place to go.”

Vik relaxed; Ruby hummed happily.

########################

Nico swept into a small boutique she and Dia frequently visited, their under twelve clothing game being on point. The manager approached right away, “How can I help you, Mrs. Kurosawa. Hello, Ruby.”

Ruby hid her face in Nico’s skirt as Nico glanced down at Vik, hands still shoved in board short pockets, yellow muscle t-shirt damp with nervous sweat, face still shadowed, and decided to take a chance, “This lovely young lady would like to try on some sundresses.”

Vik was exactly like Eli in so many ways Nico thought as Vik’s head snapped up to stare at her, tears starting in the corners of bright green eyes.

“Oooh, we just got in a new order, really bright, very fun...let me show you.” Nico encouraged Ruby to follow her de facto cousin, Nico keeping a close and affectionate eye on a Vik who had decided to be excited, just this once, just this far from Tokyo, about girly clothes, just to try.

Vik stepped out of the dressing room, a light blue sundress with bright gold cartoon fish swimming pulled over board shorts, ball cap pushed back, but only slightly. The manager stepped forward, hand out, “Why don’t you take your ca…” but was silenced by the fierce clamping of Nico’s hand around her forearm. Nico smiled cheerily at the woman, but there was a flash of danger in her eyes and the manager stepped back as Vik frowned, glance skittering around the room.

“There’s a game this evening, Hamasaki-san.” Nico said quietly, then bumped shoulders with Vik, “We can’t have anything get between you and your lucky cap, right Vik?” Chuckling, Nico pulled the brim back down, adding a gentle touch on Vik’s cheek.

Vik’s hands had been trying to find pockets in the sundress but when Nico spoke, there was a grin. And then Ruby squealed and everyone looked to where the tiny redhead had settled. She was bouncing up and down on a chair, hands clapping, “Pretty, Mommy, see. Pretty.”

“Well, Ruby likes it, and she has excellent taste, which she gets from me. Sure, she looks like Maki, but we always have to keep an eye on what your Mama wears, don’t we, sunbeam.” Nico rolled her eyes at Hamasaki, slight whining drone to her voice. “Since we moved here, my wife prefers informal beach wear.”

The manager tittered, “I know, it’s so hard to get people around here to dress up for anything but New Year’s and festivals.”

“Well, at least we have those.” Nico remembered she was in the middle of a question, “Do you like the dress, Vik?”

Vik was flipping the skirt at Ruby who was trying, with clumsy hands, to grab it from her seat. “It’s so light.”

“They’re fun to twirl.” Nico demonstrated, her dance experience choosing moves that let her own skirt float around her.

“But no pockets.” Vik stated stubbornly.

“Ah,” Nico tilted her head at Hamasaki, rolling her designer purse out from her side. “Ten year olds don’t accessorize like we do.”

“No. We do have latest Annello backpacks, really cute and bright, if you’d like.”

“Maybe.” Nico had gone over to Ruby, making sure the tiny redhead didn’t bounce herself to the floor. “But first I think we need a sundress with pockets.”

Hamasaki frowned, then sped to a rack, “Kangaroo pocket?”

“Like a hoodie?” Vik asked.

“Exactly.” The manager pushed hangers around.

“Cool.”

Hamasaki pulled a French blue and ivory striped sweatshirt dress off the rack, “It’s not as light as the sundress, and a little more form fitting, but I’ve always thought that a very lovely blue. It’s bright enough to go really well with the green in your team’s crest.”

Vik nodded, eyes alight with interest. Obviously this style suited Vik’s current self image better than the floofiness of the sundress so Nico made a mental note. Now how could she surreptitiously sneak a picture for whenever Vik decided to tell Nozomi and Eli about this.

#########################

Two sweater dresses and a fringed violet shawl later, they were back in the Nico-mobile. Everyone had picked out their own backpack as well, which Nico filled with silly socks for the people they’d left at home. Some of Maki’s had tigers prowling the toes below Mt. Fuji on them. Ruby giggled at them for five minutes for reasons Nico couldn’t figure out.

“We’ll be home in time for the game.” Nico announced after a quick travel time calculation.

“Good.” Vik buckled in.

“Any musical preferences?” Nico wondered, before she defaulted to the latest K-Pop so she could keep up with trends there.

Vik shrugged, head back, eyes closed. Ruby was beating out a song on the arms of her carseat and ignoring the front seat occupants.

Nico took another risk, trusting her ability to read an audience. “Maki’s been studying puberty blockers, if you have any questions. Nozomi said your family therapist’s been mentioning them.”

Vik grunted, an unhappy noise.

“She’d only need to talk to your parents if you want to take them.”

Vik sighed, “I thought you were the number one coolest aunt in the universe, keeper of secret identities…”

“Of course, Nico is. But Nico is also the number one resource for all your fashion worries who happens to be handily married to the number one resource for all your medical worries, UNLESS,” and here Nico let her voice drop an octave, hushed for added drama, “I catch a cold or break a ulna, then she sits around looking mopey and Nico has to import family to feed her.”

Vik turned to look at Nico, the tween’s face incredulous at the thought of the supercool Maki, who’d expertly wrapped Vik’s sprained ankle last summer in under a minute, flustered.

“She’s a big baby.” Nico nodded, face half turned so Vik could see the seriously comic furrow of her eyebrows. “One time someone had to stitch Nico’s headwound and big bad doctor Nishikino-Yazawa refused to leave the room and Cotorou had to catch her when her knees went weak. Nico is afraid of what will happen if Dia or Ruby ever ends up in the ER.” Nico flexed, “So I’ve been working out. I challenged Eli to an arm wrestling match when she gets back.”

“You’re crazier than Momma says.” Vik sounded in awe.

Nico winked, one hand rising to her temple in a gesture EVERYONE on the planet was now familiar with (at least according to Nico). “Nico Nico Ni, Nico never fails to impress.”

Vik giggled.

“Just talk to Maki IF you want to.” Nico turned her full attention back to the road, “We’re both here for you.”

Nico didn’t think she’d get a reply, but her ears picked up a sotto voce, “Thanks” before this week’s M Countdown’s top song blasted over the speakers.

############################

Maki’s face when presented with the socks had Nico giggling for five minutes. Maki held them up, at arms' length, and stared at them in all their bright blue, tackily decorated glory. “Ruby picked them out.’ Nico informed her wife, “I looked for matching flip flops but no luck.”

“Good.” Maki glared, ineffectively, at her giggling, prankish paramour.

“I have a question for you, Aunt Maki.” Vik announced suddenly to the room. Teddy and Maki both froze, Nico smiled encouragingly, Dia turned a page, and Ruby pulled off a sock to wiggle her toes freely.

“Sure.” Maki raised an eyebrow at Nico. Teddy went back to deciding which of the backpacks Nico had bought as extras she wanted for herself.

“Did you really faint when Aunt Nico got stitches?”

Maki went white, then red, “NICO-CHAN! You promised never to tell anyone about that.”

“No, Cotorou promised that. He likes you. Nico only promised herself never to let you anywhere near a wound.”

Maki began muttering, breathing in flares and starts, as Teddy and Vik watched open mouthed a scene that was now so familiar to Dia that she automatically glanced up from her book, made eye contact with her sister, then put the book down, took Ruby’s hand, and led her to the kitchen. Dia hesitated in the hallway, turning back, “Vik. Teddy. We’re having snacks now. Don’t delay.” When Dia was sure she had the twins’ attention, she made a beckoning gesture, “Come on.”

Speechless, Maki and Nico watched their oldest shepherd the other three safely out of the room, then Nico grabbed Maki in a huge hug, spinning the taller woman slightly off the floor.

“What….hey...when did you...stop that…” Maki flailed at Nico, who kept giggling.

“Nico’s been working out. Want to wrestle later?”

“Nico-chan! Children.”

“They sleep soundly. Once the twins finish booby trapping the bathroom. That takes a lot of energy.” Nico sank into a pillow, “Wonder if Dia will bring us back tea?”

“Nico-chan, she’s too young for the stove.”

“Which is why we have an electric tea kettle, Maki-chan. Don’t worry. I aim to keep everyone who isn’t a doctor out of the ER.”

Maki knelt to kiss her wife, “As long as you start with you.”

Nico smirked as Maki’s lips neared. “Nico thinks you love the socks.”

Maki did the only thing possible. Kiss Nico even more thoroughly than she’d planned and wonder if she could find a way to hint that the twins use the Fuji tigers as booby trap material. Or maybe if Maki left them out over the weekend, Rin could ‘borrow’ them. And then Maki stopped thinking about anything but the tingle of Nico’s fingers sliding through her hair.

A/N: Who doesn't want a Pet Shop Boy song in their head? Have a favorite? I like "It's A Sin" and "West End Girls"

Have been wanting to spend more time with Vik and Teddy and I finally figured out where to start. Vik and Teddy are semi identical twins, who share genes from one parent and who each received a different set from the other parent (We are going with science babies in this AU). I came across articles about the one known case of this when I was researching intersex conditions and designing characters in this second μ's generation. Since I was planning for Nozomi and Eli to have twins, this seemed the perfect fit for them and the stories I was spinning.

In other news, the next Casual Lunacy chapter is chugging along.Take care!

[champagneandparacosm-archive]

She gave him one last squeeze, trying to empty all the bad contents of today out of him before she released, holding onto his arms as she nodded. “O’course you can, sugar! Not sure why you were watin’ this long…” she was complaining, for she loved the rain. She danced in it often. “Come inside and tell me all about it, and we’ll get ya warmed up.” She let her hands drop, flashing one last smile, though it was hard to see through the torrent outside, before she hurried on inside, opening the screen door for him and quickly shutting it so her cat, Sunny, didn’t get out. That silly cat was always trying to sneak outside and sniff the posies! Normally she let her out, but today was simply too dreary. Sunny wouldn’t like it anyways. She just didn’t know it yet.

It was a warm and cozy environment, much like her papas farm house in the south. She filled it with all her favorite things: oranges and yellows and reds and flowers and it smelled like pumpkin spice because it was turning autumn and loved loved loved candles and wax warmers. She loved the autumn weather; she adored flannels and hoodies and even rainy nights like these curled up with a good book and her prissy little cat and her favorite favorite friend. Logan.

Once safely inside, she retreated into her bedroom to grab a towel not soaked and to find a hoodie he might be able to fit into. She wore oversized clothing all the time, most were her paps, like the old worn sweater she found. It had his farm name on it, that farm having been in the family for generations. She moved north to pursue her dream of becoming a veterinarian. She was still in the process of doing so. But she was getting there. She came out, offered him the towel and set the sweater onto the couch. “I found one of my paps ole sweaters. Should help ya stay cozy. You want some tea or cocoa?” The weather was too perfect not to offer it.

🎵 whoever you have muse for! And if you want a certain character of mine to pair xx

Based on this rp meme !

[ a shuffled song from my 930 song, 60h 49min playlist: Dido - Thank you ] [ text ]: so i missed my bus [ text ]: and was late for work today [ text ]: and my manager wouldnt let me hear the end of it all day [ text ]: maybe ill just quit to save her the trouble [ text ]: oh and im hungover It was one of those days that made you wonder why you got out of bed at all. Everything that could go wrong did and everything that was already planned and sorted out.. also went wrong. Logan wasn't one to be pessimistic but days like these really tested the limits of his happy-go-lucky optimistic outlook on life; days where, at the end of the day, he found himself standing in the pouring rain. He had no jacket, a guitar case hanging loosely around his left shoulder as he stood outside their house. The only place he would want to go to after having the ultimately shittiest day in a long time. His phone rang and he smiled at the name it showed, struggling to answer at all due to the rain hitting the screen, but he brought it to his ear eagerly when he finally did. Once hearing their voice, he couldn't do anything but laugh. He looked like a complete moron. But, in front of them, it wasn't so bad. "Can you please come outside?" He knew it was pouring rain but there was something so tragicomic about it all. "I'm outside your place."

[rebel-band]

Track 3. Wednesday Night Blues

The faded blue shade of his middle school uniform, or what was now left of it, had always given Yoo-mi a sharp pressing feeling in his stomach, cold as a weather front moving swiftly to bring thunderstorms.

The trousers he outgrew already in August so they stayed behind at the beach house.

The polo, slashed and stained, rested probably in a dumpster some 600 km away across Japan. He was left with a once oversize cardigan, now quite literally, a painfully uncomfortable burden on his shoulders. A last reminder of when things went to shit.

"Are you alright?" Mika greeted him outside the school gate with eyebrows raised at Yoo-mi's hunched pose and pained face expression.

"It's this damn thing," he tugged at the buttons and the scruffy fabric at his chest, "I can barely breathe in it."

He suddenly got an urge to just get it off. Middle of the street, right in front of the school, he wiggled out of the sweater, tied it around his waist, and put the parka back onto the white shirt. A pair of girls leaving the school yard this moment gasped at the sight.

"Well looks like you've grown quite a bit since last wearing it," Mika gave him a fond smile.

"Should have just gone without it in the first place," he grumbled, brows furrowed. He took a side glance at another wave of students impeccably dressed in winter school uniforms curiously peeking at him while leaving from the exam.

"You know how it is, keeping up appearances. Makes for brownie points if you show the principal and teachers you've been sooo into your old school."

"That's the thing, I wasn't."

If anything, he was glad he wouldn't need to wear it ever again.

"Why are you even here?" he asked.

Yamaguchi's boxy black Honda was parked just opposite the street.

"Oh, I just had a doctor's appointment nearby," Mika patted her belly with a smile.

You couldn't really tell Mika was pregnant yet, and the oversize clothes she liked wearing weren't helping. Yoo-mi was pretty sure that apart from the grey hoodie she tended to borrow from her husband, it was also Kotarō's flannel she was sporting underneath it today, only the slim quilted waistcoat and the long skirt unmistakably hers in this outfit of the day.

"Should you really be drinking that?" he shot a look at a black paper cup with the Blackbird logo she was holding.

"Hush, one real one a day is fine. Kotarō found the best decaf he could for me, but it still tastes a bit ugh," she made a small whine.

She then rummaged in her shopper bag with one hand. "Here you go," she said and tossed him a little red package. It said, With love and appreciation in a faintly tacky font.

"What's this?"

"Obligatory chocolate. It's Valentine's today, silly."

Was it? For all he cared, it was a Wednesday like any other but he was grateful for the carbs, suddenly aware of the mental effort after the exams.

"How'd it go?"

"So, so. Math was easy, probably bombed Japanese," he shrugged, half of the chocolate already in his mouth.

"Not one for lofty words, I hear ya," she laughed.

"Can you drop me back to work? I'm late already."

"Nope."

"Fine, I'll walk."

"No, I mean, you're not going to work, Sado is covering your shift," she grabbed him by the sleeve.

Yoo-mi made a face at her mentioning the engineering student who worked part time at Blackbird, as did Kate.

"I'm taking you out for a treat," she said, seeing his frown, then added, "Their idea."

She quickly dialed a number on her phone and then forced it to his hand. Yoo-mi heard the line connect almost instantly as if someone had waited.

"Yumi, I'm so proud of you," a woman's voice called maybe a bit too loud and too close to the receiver on the other end.

He smiled.

"Haven't done anything yet. We'll see in a month."

"What does he mean he hasn't done anything!" he heard another voice grumble in the background.

"He there?" Yoo-mi asked and waited as the woman handed over the receiver. "There. I tried," he said.

"Well you had better," Kobayashi's voice was another grumpy grumble. "Good work, Ko," he added, nevertheless.

"Like I said, give it a month," Yoo-mi corrected.

"Good work," the man repeated with feeling before hanging up.

"Where are we going?" Yoo-mi eyed Mika, as she got them into heavier traffic, muttering swear words when a Prius suddenly changed lanes too close to their Honda.

"First, curry, then -- a surprise. Don't give me that look! I swear you're gonna love it," she grinned at Yoo-mi.

With a sigh he looked out the window.

He couldn't exactly remember the last time he was being driven around in the passenger seat but he could recall the Benz having more legroom than Mika's kei car. Then again, he was much taller now.

They passed Shibuya and Roppongi over on the motorway, then circled behind the Imperial Palace on the C1. After around 20 minutes of driving, Mika found a parking place, and from there they walked towards a street lit with neons inviting patrons to wine and dine.

GoGo Curry was Mika's choice for today, and a black Gorilla sculpture beaconing them inside with a thumbs up seemed to approve.

The meal was more than good, it was perfect for the icy weather and the mood today, real comfort food for a done in soul. Yoo-mi made a mental note to stop by a konbini and get some cubes to cook himself a curry next week too.

"Not bad today, hm?" Somehow he knew Mika wasn't really meaning to talk about the food.

He tapped the already empty plate with a spoon, and after a while mumbled, "They were all staring, I know it."

"At their exam sheets," Mika tried to dismiss the worried thought from his mind but he wasn't really listening.

"And they all knew each other, came with...someone."

"That's not true. There are students from different schools attending the same exam, you know that,"  she said, "They don't all know each other. Every one of them as freaked out as you were about it. And besides, I thought you didn't really like company," she teased.

"And I thought it was none of your business what I liked," he snapped.

Seeing her cringe, Yoo-mi bit his lip. He bumped a rolled fist into the tabletop lightly. "Sorry."

Mika wasn't really angry but appreciated the apology.

"I thought the same thing at my exams. It's hard being the outsider," she replied. "Then it turned out, when I asked my mates, none of them really remembered me from the day.

"You may have met your future classmates, who knows, but the impression is not a given. You're gonna have to what--?"

Yoo-mi rolled his eyes. There it was, the damn resemblance.

"Work on it," he replied.

"That's right, work on it when you get in," Mika nodded her head.

"If I get in," he corrected.

"Tell you what," she leaned in to him over the table, "You don't get in, I let you name my kid." A wide grin spread on her face.

Yoo-mi swallowed. He didn't know what terrified him more this very second -- the fact she was not joking, the fact she was so sure he would succeed, or maybe the fact that Kotarō would probably kill him, were he to take that dare.

"Not helping," he groaned and laid his head on the table. He noticed her phone laying about and finally remembered his own in the inner pocket of the parka. There was no point having it in the exam room, what with the school's policy. He turned it on again now.

"By the way, this came in for you today," she handed him an envelope with an official looking seal while he was looking at several missed calls from the lawyer.

"Sorry, a lot of your post will most likely end up in the café, the postman hardly ever gets it straight to the flat."

It was fine. He never got any post before.

Phone still in hand, he took the envelope but first opened the photo attachment he noticed the lawyer sent in an email. He drew in a breath at the sight.

It was the residency card. His photo, his name stated on the laminated plastic.

The vibrating phone snapped him back from the surprise. It was Hikaru calling again.

"Great news, Ko-kun," she greeted. "Managed to snatch you a resident card. There was a ton of digging and back and forths, turns out you never had one other than the one registered in the orphanage, long expired now. Long story short, it was a mess. But it's done." She sounded accomplished, smug almost. Yoo-mi could see her grin with the phone to her ear.

"Sorry I had to take it but they still need to register your new address on it in the ward office. I'll drop by to hand it over when that battle's won."

"Massive thanks," he could only say in return, full of relief. You had to hand it to her, she did not waste her time around the paperwork.

"Don't mention it," she giggled at the Osakan phrase he slipped in. "In the meantime, I've sent you your family registry. You've never seen it, right?"

"No," he swallowed, looking at the envelope addressed to him, heart suddenly beating faster.

"Well, there's no reason for you not to have it. Just..." she paused for a second, Yoo-mi fearing what she might say. "Talk to me, or Mika, about it when you feel like it, yeah?"

What's to talk about, he thought dryly to himself.

"I'll be sure to think about it," he answered, voice flat with no conviction.

She only sighed in response at the gentle Osakan refusal.

"Fingers crossed for the exams. I'll see you soon," she added and dropped the call.

He stared at the envelope tapping his foot and then noticed Mika give him a concerned look.

"Well, gotta go, preggo bladder calling," she suddenly raised from the booth towards the toilet placing a hand on his shoulder as she dismissed herself. With her gone, he tore the envelope open.

The koseki was a black and white sheet of soulless columns and rows.

He never cared for the "Father N.N." but his heart skipped a beat seeing her name on paper.

Ko Hae-ju. Deceased.

Very much so, he thought, something tight in his throat and chest like a fist ready to strike all of a sudden.

God, they didn't even tell him where she was buried.

Running from the memory, he moved the gaze down onto another row.

Offspring, it said formally.

And there he was.

Or rather, there they were. Two rows, one date.

He folded the paper in half. It was too much for one day already.

Mika found him sitting already dressed in the parka, hands in pockets, looking blankly at the exit.

"We can go, right" it wasn't really a question, he just stood up and moved to the door. "Thanks for the meal, I'll pay you back next month."

"No one's paying no one back," she fussed. "Wait, what about the surprise?"

Yoo-mi didn't answer. He was entirely through with surprises, through with this day.

Without taking a look back at Mika he stomped out of the restaurant and dashed through the street.

He knew he could easily lose her even if it wasn't too crowded like today, even if it wasn't the neighbourhood he had known; he had done that before. He wasn't quite running yet but the anger boiling under his heart was the perfect propeller helping him keep a pace as swift as the blood pumping in his ears. His chucks made a crushing sound as they gritted on the gravel on what must have been a slippery sidewalk beneath.

The crouching evening was sapping the last light of the winter day, and with every minute Yoo-mi felt like it drank all the warmth out of his body as well. The world turned frigid gray with the looming night.

Then, in a mere second, it also turned upside down.

He was thrown off balance on a patch of ice, and desperately tried to remember what it's like to keep calm skidding a surfboard over a riptide to avoid grubbing face first into a wave. But then his legs caught into something and gave in, and there was no way to keep steady. He landed head down on his back on the icy pavement with a thud and a racing heart.

That fucking thing.

That piece of shit rag. That goddamn fucking blue!

He growled and with a hard pull got the tangled blue sweater out from between his legs. His head hit the ice again.

Dark grey clouds were hanging overhead the grey Tokyo skyscrapers as he looked up into the sky right there on the grey pavement. He winced and silently cursed his drab life. Life distinctively void of colour but for the damn blue.

He closed his eyes for a brief second. He needed to get up, there was enough of staring done at him today.

But the street was really empty and no one had noticed. And truth be told, him laying on the floor wasn't even the strangest sight around. Because that was explicitly reserved for what he saw upside down in the nearest fancy storefront.

There was a grand piano and a young man.

He was playing and was, too put it mildly, seriously out of place.

Yoo-mi scooped himself up to a sit hardly taking his eyes off.

He had hair dyed faded blue, and a handsome profile. His movements on the black and white keys were pleasant to watch -- like a calm before the storm.

He wore a purple hooded sweatshirt embroidered with a bright flashy tiger under a blue denim jacket, black rugged jeans on his legs paired with some showy brand sneakers.

A Starbucks takeaway cup stood on the floor at the side of the piano bench. He must have placed it before sitting down.

He looked so offbeat, such a contrast with the classic grandeur of the black instrument, and yet somehow the man and the piano fit like a glove.

Yoo-mi couldn't really hear what he was playing through the traffic and the thick window pane but he was pretty sure it was no cover. The determination on the man's face was more than what you'd see when simply re-playing someone else's composition.

Finally, realising he was being watched, the young man tilted his head to the side, and sent Yoo-mi a flirty smile.

"Not nice, running out on a pregnant chick like that," Mika smacked Yoo-mi on the head with her scarf. It pulled him out of thoughts just in time for the stranger at the piano to not notice what Yoo-mi was sure to be his bewildered if not a slightly blushed face.

"Great landing by the way, saw from the end of the street. Very majestic," she teased as he scrambled to his feet. She stood there, arms crossed over the chest.

"You done?" he snapped.

Mika narrowed her eyes and made a low rumbly noise, like she just swallowed the thing she was meaning to say. Instead, she started walking.

"At least you chose the right direction, come on," she hurried him trying not to sound flustered.

Yoo-mi exhaled and before moving took a sneaky side glance at the storefront again. But the man was gone, and the only blue left in sight was the cardigan in Yoo-mi's hand. He threw it away to the closest bin.

"How'd you even catch up?" Yoo-mi asked.

"Please, a runaway won't ever outrun a runaway," Mika said like she really meant it, and oh boy, instant chills over his right arm and neck, did he fucking hope she was wrong.

Trailing by her side, he looked around, and only then noticed that the street was filled with storefronts similar to the one he had just seen. It was full of showrooms for musical instruments, new and used alike.

"Never been to Ochanomizu, I see," Mika grinned at his wide open eyes.

He looked around, head spinning from store banner to store banner, so she just dragged him by the sleeve into the second shop on the left. Bad Boss Guitars it was called, and Mika greeted the owner and chatted away casually like with a good friend.

"Surprise," she gestured around at the rows upon rows of stands and wall hangers filled with guitars of every size, shape, and brand Yoo-mi could think of.

He stood by the door, hand at his mouth, clearly failing at keeping himself from shifting from foot to the other in place.

"Can I look?" he asked so fast the words almost fused together, then shot Mika and then the owner a hungry glance.

"Look, touch, play. All you want, kiddo," Mika grinned again.

His hand went from covering the mouth to covering the eyes for a brief second, then a smile curled on his lips, and straight off he handed her the parka to spring in between the stalls.

Mika took a stool her friend offered, and was meaning to simply continue reading the Secrets of Raising the Happiest Kids she had picked up from a bookstore some time ago, while Yoo-mi enjoyed his time around the shop.

But then, with a smile, she settled on watching him instead.

[joonbird]

Comfort Inn Ending | 4

➭“It was you who Jungkook gave his heart to- that is, until the day you broke it. And it is you now, hoping that some faultlines can be repaired, and that some broken hearts can be put back together again.”

pairing: jungkook x reader

genre: angst, smut

wordcount: 8.3k

inspiration

part one | two | three | four | five | six | seven

You were shivering as you walked home. Your lips were slightly swollen from the kisses you and Jungkook shared, your eyes red from your tears. That was nothing though, compared to what was going through your head. His voice echoed in your mind like a drum beat. 

Don’t do this to me again.

The guilt, it was weighing you down, making your entire body heavy and useless. He was right. You had no right to ask him for anything. The memory of the look on his face before he left you there on that rooftop, the fresh pain in his eyes and his furrowed brows... it just made the guilt worse.

I just got over you.

Was it wrong for you to hope that he hadn’t fully gotten over you? You were torn, wanting him to be happy, to have closure. But another part of you, a larger, more ragged, selfish side, fiercely argued that you didn’t want him to ever get over you.

The minute you walked through your door, you went straight to your bedroom. You felt disoriented, your head pounding and your eyes raw from crying so much. You were sick of the tears, of the heartache. 

You didn’t know what to do, all you did know was that seeing Jungkook tonight had you regressing back to the start. You weren’t over Jungkook, you never had been. You just didn’t know what you were supposed to do about it. You needed definitive answers, you needed a sign. Something, anything, to give you direction.

You rummaged below your bed until you found it, the shoebox that you kept under there. You had never gotten the strength to throw it away, but you also never had the strength to look at it again since you had moved homes. You sat there for a moment, staring at it. The silence was so loud it was deafening.

You pulled your knees in to your chest, taking a deep breath in. You weren’t crying anymore, as you opened the lid of the box.

Your eyes fell on the contents of the box and your heart immediately twisted. You pulled out a black hoodie that still smelled faintly like him, holding the soft fabric in your hands. You pulled out an old bottle of facial cleanser. There were polaroids and photos scattered at the bottom of the box, you looked through them all, feeling your resolve waver. The photos felt like distant memories of happier times, you had such a big smile on your face in all the photos. Jungkook had an even bigger smile on his in them. You let your fingertips run wistfully across the photos before you put them down. You had no answers, you were still as confused as ever. Maybe it was time to throw away this box, throw away these memories, and move on. 

Just as you were beginning to put the lid back on the box, a flash of bright orange caught your eye and you hesitated. It was a sticky note, a tiny square of paper stuck on the back of one of the photos. 

You picked it up, your eyes falling on it. It was a tiny note, something Jungkook had quickly written for you and stuck on the fridge when the two of you had been living together. Jungkook kept sticky note pads around the house, he liked to jot down lyric and song ideas. You’d find random sticky notes with words and phrases on them everywhere. Sometimes, they wouldn’t be lyrics at all, but love letters, addressed to you.

Never give up on me, his messy, sloping handwriting made you smile. I will be the best man I can be for you. I will never stop trying. Your fingertips traced his words, your breath hitched in your throat. You will always have my heart.

You held the little sticky note in your hands, looking up and around your empty bedroom. It was a tiny reminder of everything you had shared with Jungkook, a small throwback to the immense love the two of you had for one another. You still loved him. you had been a fool to think that those feelings would just go away. You loved him and seeing him again had brought back a flood of feelings, a sea of emotion that you had attempted to keep locked back behind a dam. Now, that dam had broken and you couldn’t hide from it anymore. You had to confront it.

You loved every part of Jungkook and there was so much about him, within him, that you knew you would never be able to find with anyone else. There were things about him that you had never appreciated when you had been together, things and habits you couldn’t stop thinking about now. 

You winced, wishing more than anything that you had articulated those thoughts to him better today. You had wanted to tell him how much he meant to you. That you shouldn’t have taken him for granted. You wanted to tell him that you missed his sense of humour, how he would always lighten up a tense situation with a silly face expression and a sudden outburst of goofiness. You wanted to tell him you missed feeling the atmosphere change when he was stressed or moody, you even missed your petty arguments with him. He would always tell you he was sorry for not being better, now, you wanted to tell him you were sorry.

Jungkook was the definition of a perfectionist in all aspects of his life. His career, his music, and his relationship with you. He was always striving to keep your relationship fresh, to keep you happy. He was always apologizing for things that didn’t even bother you, you would catch him with his brow furrowed, telling you he wished he had more hours in a day to spend with you. He had done so much for you and been so much for you, and you had taken it all for granted. Not anymore.

You glanced back down at his words. Never give up on me. You steeled your resolve, putting the sticky note on top of the box and pushing it back under your bed. You hadn’t even fought for Jungkook properly yet. You owed it to him, and to yourself, to try harder. To fight for him, to show him that you weren’t giving up on him, that he was important to you.

It was worth it. Jungkook was worth it. You knew now, with the ghost of his kiss still lingering on your lips, the image of hesitation etched on his face before he tore himself away from you, that there was a part of him that loved you too. You couldn’t give up. You wouldn’t give up.

You clenched your jaw in determination as you gazed at your tear streaked face in the mirror. No more tears, you told yourself. Starting tomorrow morning, you were going to do whatever necessary to prove to Jungkook that you were willing to fight for him.

You woke up early, nervous but still sure of your decision. You were going to stop by Jungkook’s dorm before you had work, and ask Jungkook to talk. You knew he had 9AM practice most mornings, and you had your fingers crossed his schedule hadn’t changed. You got out of bed, heading straight to your closet and rummaging through its contents. You felt on edge already, your hands trembling as you picked out your outfit carefully. It was to any onlooker a normal outfit, yet you had chosen it meticulously, pondering carefully on each different piece of clothing. You wanted it to be perfect. 

You were wearing your black skinny jeans, the ones that Jungkook always said were his favourites. You had a big woolly sweater on top, a dark burgundy red one that you had been wearing the night you had seen Jungkook in Hongdae, watching buskers. It had been a cold night then, and everybody was dressed in all black, embracing the winter weather. Except for you. Jungkook told you after your first date that he had noticed you across the crowd from the busker that the two of you were listening to... because of your jumper. He told you it was your sweater first, and then the look in your eyes as you listened to the street music, that drew him to you. He used to call it your ‘Lucky Sweater’, saying it was the jumper that had brought the two of you together.

After careful deliberation, you chose your white tennis sneakers, the ones Jungkook had bought you on a trip the two of you had taken to Busan last year. You had planned every detail, as if choosing these things carefully gave you more of a chance to win him back. You glanced at your reflection in the mirror before leaving your place, feeling nerves in your pulse and in every beat of your heart. 

It was an odd feeling, walking to the dorm when it had been so long since you had last been there. You weren’t sure what your plan of action was for once you saw him, but you knew you would figure it out. 

You passed the old bakery you and Jungkook used to go to together before he had practice in the mornings. You smiled at the sight of the familiar building, walking in on a whim. The warm scent of baked goods enveloped you, the woman working behind the counter smiled when she saw you, her cheeks were pink from the heat of the oven.

“It’s been so long since I’ve seen you!” She called out warmly, you just smiled back. “It has,” You responded agreeably. “Can I get one of your raspberry muffins please?”

They were Jungkook’s favourite, he had gone through a phase of semi-addiction to the muffins last year and eaten 7 in one day. She smiled, getting it from the display with tongs, placing it in a paper bag.

“For your boyfriend?” She asked conversationally. “I haven’t seen him in a while either. The two of you will keep coming to see us, won’t you?” 

You smiled weakly, nodding. “I’ll try my hardest,” You replied honestly, passing her the money for the muffin and cradling the paper bag in your hands. “Keep the change.”

You left the store, wondering when exactly the last time was that Jungkook had visited that little bakery. You wondered if he had done what you had done when the two of you had broken up, avoiding familiar places, trying to hide from any reminders of the past. 

You sighed a little, walking down further until you reached the dorm. You stood outside, staring up at the building for a moment. It had been so long since you had been here, you trembled, feeling the nerves heavy in your throat. You missed it, coming here with Jungkook on his days off, having meals with the guys, being part of their family. You had thrown that away.

The front door opened and voices floated out. You recognized them instantly, the deep rumbling voice and a higher pitched, clear voice. It was Hoseok and Yoongi.

You froze, you hadn’t been planning to run into any of the guys, unsure of how they’d react to seeing you standing there, waiting outside their dorm. You stood still, paralyzed for a moment, before you reacted. 

You jumped and turned, ducking and crouching so your body was tucked in next to the bins, trying to minimize yourself as much as possible. Thankfully, Hoseok and Yoongi didn’t register your presence, stopping to stand outside their dorm. You could hear their conversation, and your heart twisted when you realized they were talking about Jungkook.

“…he was wrecked last night,” Hoseok sighed, you stayed still, feeling your heart pound. “Fucking hell Yoongi, you should’ve seen him man. He was all shaken and he went straight to his room. He wouldn’t talk to anyone, not even Namjoon.” 

Yoongi responded immediately. “God, when’s he going to get over this? What exactly happened last night?”

You heard Hoseok’s loud sigh. “I don’t know. Something to do with Y/N.” They lapsed into companionable silence for a moment, you held your breath. Your heart was beating louder and faster at their words.

“I feel sorry for him.” Hoseok added sadly. “Poor guy got his heart smashed into pieces. I’ll never forgive her for that.”

You felt a shaky breath leave your lips at their words, guilt and regret seeping into the deepest parts of you at Hoseok’s words, the anger in his voice. That was all you.

“He’ll get over her soon,” Yoongi said dismissively, you could hear their footsteps, they were walking away from the dorm down the street, their voices getting quieter. “She lost her chance when she had it.”

You stayed still, trembling. The reality of your situation was hitting you again, you had broken Jungkook’s heart and you had no idea how things were going to get better. Further, you had destroyed your relationship with the other members, that much was clear. You felt the heavy sensation of guilt after hearing the guys talk, knowing they had every right to hate you. You felt your heart beat faster as you stood up shakily to leave, beginning to feel afraid that his was all a mistake. 

You glanced up to the driveway and spotted him. Jungkook.

Jungkook was walking down the driveway, earphones in his ears, dressed casually in a beanie and a hoodie. He spotted you immediately, shock in his eyes as he spotted you.

“What… are you doing?” He asked in surprise, before covering up the surprise on his face, a steely look in his eyes.

You looked at him, he looked exhausted, circles under his eyes, which were slightly puffy. You knew instantly Jungkook had been up all night, and worse, he had been crying.

“I…” You began, silence hanging between the two of you. It was a heavy, uncomfortable silence and you shuffled from foot to foot as you stared at him.

“I brought you, um, food.” You held the bag in front of you, he just eyed it skeptically.

You rushed to fill the silences, stammering over your words. “It’s um, your favourite. Raspberry and white chocolate muffins, you know, from our place-”

“I’ve already eaten.” He cut you off, looking away into the distance. His coldness caused a pang of hurt to echo through you before you nodded slowly. Bravely, you held out the paper bag to him, stepping a tiny bit closer.

“Um okay… well I was wondering if um, on the way to practice, we could get a coffee or something? And talk?” 

He finally met your gaze, his eyes were flat and cold.

“I don’t drink coffee anymore.”

Your mouth dropped open a little, he was already looking away, down at his phone. You opened and closed your mouth a few times, unsure of what to say.

“Oh… you don’t? You love coffee,” You managed lamely. As long as you had known Jungkook, he couldn’t function without his morning coffee. Usually it was something sweet and strong, a triple shot caramel macchiato was his usual. You had dropped coffee off to him at practices in the past more times than you could remember. The countless times he had bounded up to you, sweaty and grateful for the caffeine, while Yoongi watched, rolling his eyes and muttering that macchiatos "didn’t count as coffee".

Jungkook just shrugged, still scrolling through something on his phone. 

“Not anymore. Things change.”

He didn’t meet your gaze, you just nodded, swallowing. He was being so cold and rigid, you didn’t know how to respond. 

“Oh. Okay. Well um, bubble tea or something?”

He was still staring at his phone. “I can’t.”

You just nodded slowly, looking down at the floor and at your shoes. You had painfully, carefully chosen your shoes this morning and he hadn’t even looked twice at them. You cursed yourself for being so stupid, thinking winning him back would be that easy.

“Is that all?” Jungkook’s voice interrupted your thoughts, you glanced up to see him looking over at you, a cold look on his face. It was so unfamiliar that you just stared at him, unsure of how to proceed.

“Um,” You began. “I…” He glanced back down at his phone and you squeezed your eyes shut for a millisecond, telling yourself to gather your courage. “Jungkook, I’m sorry. For everything. I’m not going to stop saying it because I will always mean it. I regret what happened and I… I miss you.” Your words came out in a jumbled, frantic rush. You saw his head twitch slightly to the side, something he did when he was unsure. You took that as a sign and hurried to talk.

“Jungkook… this is me fighting for you. I know I fucked up. And I know things are different now. But I want to prove to you that I will fight for you. I want to show you that I’m not giving up on you, I’m not giving up on us. Because even if you don’t believe in us, I do.”

Your words hung in the air for a moment before Jungkook shoved his phone in his pocket, putting one earphone back in his ear. A passive expression was on his face, he just stared at you blankly and you felt your heart sink.

“Okay.” He started walking past you, you followed beside him silently for a few steps, feeling your heart pound.

“Jungkook, can we talk about this…?”

He turned his head to glance down at you dismissively.

“There’s nothing to talk about.”

You swallowed. “Okay, well can you at least take the muffin? I bought it for you to eat. Please.” You held out the paper bag to him, willing him to look at you, to give you something, anything.

He kept walking, looking ahead emotionlessly. 

You sighed quietly. “Jungkook, please take the muffin, and I’ll leave you alone.”

He snatched it with one of his hands, his mouth settling into a firm line. If it had been any other situation you would’ve laughed at how he looked, like a kid, his mouth set, refusing to look at you.

Instead, you were quiet, stopping to let him breeze past you. He continued walking down the street, not noticing or not caring that you had stopped walking beside him. Doubt began to creep into your mind about what you were doing. He had been so cold, so unresponsive. He had stared at you like you were a stranger, as if you meant nothing to him. Maybe you did mean nothing to him and this whole thing was a waste of your time and his time.

You watched as he opened the paper bag, glancing inside. And then in one smooth motion, he threw it in the bin. You stared, your heart throbbing in pain, watching as he walked away, his body getting smaller and smaller until you couldn’t see it anymore.

It had been a long day, you had been trapped in your own thoughts, unable to focus at work. All you could think about was Jungkook, the cold look in his eyes. When you were home, finally, you dropped your bag on the floor and went straight to your room. You were exhausted, drained. Your entire body had been tensed all day without you even realizing, reliving every word you had said to Jungkook. It had been so unsuccessful, you were feeling deflated and hopeless. The mental image of him discarding your muffin was playing on an endless loop in your brain, you groaned loudly and flopped onto your bed.

You just wanted this day to be over. You were exhausted, and you welcomed sleep gratefully. You wanted a break from your own thoughts, from your own regrets. As you slipped into sleep, the last image in your head was a clip of Jungkook’s face this morning, staring ahead, away from you, right before he had walked away.

You were dreaming. 

You were in the boys’ dorm living room, you gazed around and smiled at the familiarity of your setting. You could vaguely smell Jin cooking stew, and noisy chatter coming from the kitchen. Above all, your felt loose, comfortable as you looked around you, you were sitting on the couch. The dorm. It was your home away from home.

You only knew you were dreaming because things were slow, and hazy. And Jungkook was there.

Jungkook had appeared in so many of your dreams in the last six months that you weren’t surprised to see him. He was sitting beside you on the couch, an arm draped comfortably around yours. 

You smiled at him, he just smiled down at you. “What, jagiya?” He laughed, his voice was stretched out, slow, and you just shrugged. “Nothing.”

You nestled closer into him, enjoying the feeling of his arm around you casually, the comfort of having him there. 

“I missed you,” You whispered softly, to no one in particular. You knew with a sad clarity that you were in a dream, that this wasn’t your reality anymore. 

Yet you enjoyed these dreams, these strange, hazy stolen moments with Jungkook. They weren’t real, and you knew that, but you still took what you could get.

“Jungkook, I’m sorry,” A voice floated into your dream, you glanced up and squinted. It was Taehyung, standing there with his arms on his hips, a pleading look on his face. “I’m sorry…” 

You blinked, and when you opened your eyes, Taehyung was gone, and it was just you and Jungkook. Except the setting had changed. You were in your old bedroom, tucked into the crook of his neck. You glanced around in confusion, it was definitely your old apartment, your old bed.

“Where’s Taehyung?” You asked dazedly.

“I don’t know, I don’t care. I’m mad at him. We’re in a fight.” Jungkook muttered, you pulled away to glance at his face. He had a steely look in his eyes, it was an expression that was eerily familiar. You just couldn’t remember why. Where had you seen that look on his face before?

“Why are you being like that? It’s Tae,” You asked softly, poking his waist. He just glanced at you, his face soft before he shrugged. 

“I don’t know,” He admitted, kissing the side of your forehead absently. “I’m stubborn. I don’t want to apologize first to hyung when he was the one to wrong me. I don’t want to be weak, I want to be strong.” Something in his words caused something to prick in your memory but your brain felt foggy, hazy. You just nodded slowly at his words.

“Besides,” Jungkook’s voice was slowed down even more, you knew you were going to wake up soon. Your dream was starting to fray at the edges. You curled up closer to him, suddenly feeling desperate. You wanted to stay in this dream with him forever. “If he really is sorry, then he’ll prove it to me…”

You woke up, to the sound of your alarm ringing, your face dotted in sweat.

Your dream, still vivid in your memory, had you shaking. You knew it was a sign.

You knew Jungkook like the back of your hand, he was your Jungkook and you knew how he worked, how his mind worked. It wasn’t over yet. You had to try again. You had to keep fighting for Jungkook. It wasn’t going to be easy, but if it was for the slight possibility that he might forgive you, allow you back into his heart, then it was worth it.

You glanced at your phone, if you rushed, you would be able to make it to the boys’ dorm before work. You dressed quickly, not thinking about your outfit, just getting ready quickly. You had to try again, you had to fight again. You repeated the words in your mind as you left your apartment.

You hurried to the dorm, feeling a new, fresh determination wash over you. It was quiet outside when you got there, you stood against the wall, your senses on alert for any of the other members or staff, waiting until you saw him.

Twenty minutes passed and then you saw him. He was dressed in a different outfit, a sweater you had gotten him last year and ripped jeans. Your heart skipped a beat when you saw him, he glanced around for a moment but didn’t see you. You took him in, his handsome face, his lean body, and it made your heart ache for a moment.

You stepped out, his eyes fell on you and surprise once again melted over his face.

“Jungkook,” You addressed, he just ignored you.

“Jungkook,” You repeated, hurrying to catch up with him. He just grunted in response.

“I’m not giving up,” You said suddenly, fiercely. He stopped walking and glanced down at you, he had an unreadable expression on his face. You continued on.

“I am not giving up. I’ll wait outside your dorm every morning to convince you to talk to me if that’s what I have to do.”

His eyes flashed a little as he just stared at you silently. 

“Jungkook, please.” Your voice softened a little. “Please, can we talk? All I’m asking is for you to hear me out. Please.” 

He just stared at you before he tore his eyes away, looking into the distance behind you.

“I’m busy today, I have practice until 9pm.”

“I’ll meet you after practice. Please. Just thirty minutes.” Desperation coloured your voice, you stared at him hopefully, you crossed your fingers and prayed for him to say yes. 

He studied your face before he sighed a little, shrugging. He didn’t meet your gaze.

“Alright.”

You fought to keep the ecstatic grin from your face, struggling to stay calm.

“Thank you, thank you. Um, is practice still at the same-”

“Yep.” He cut you off coldly, picking up the pace and beginning to walk faster.

You let him walk away, a smile on your face.

“Okay, I’ll see you at 9PM,” You called out after his retreating figure. As expected he didn’t respond, but still, you couldn’t stop the smile from spreading across your face.

This was your chance.

You were outside the practice studio at 8.55PM, your nerves forming a bundle in your stomach. You had a million sentences in your mind, things you wanted to say. You needed the perfect words and you couldn’t get them to sound right, no matter how many times you tried. You paced back and forth nervously, it was dark outside and you had your coat bundled up around you, yet you were still shivering. You bounced up and down on your feet, feeling nerves, excitement, anticipation grip you. You had to get this right. 

You waited, frowning when you glanced down at your phone. 9.15PM. Where was he?

You lowered onto the step, tucking your knees under your arm as you leaned against the staircase, sighing. You had to wait.

Everytime someone walked past, you straightened, eyes lighting up, only to be disappointed. It wasn’t Jungkook.

You sighed softly, staring up at the sky. The stars only stared back, the sky was too cloudy to see the moon. 

You thought about your rooftop, you thought about Jungkook, about how you had seen him standing there just a few days ago, looking out at the sky. 

It had been a sign. He had to be coming.

You were still sitting there when two hours had passed, feeling weak and unsure of what to do. You had been waiting for so long, you weren’t sure if he was still inside practicing, you had no idea what was going on. You didn’t have his number, so you couldn’t call. And you didn’t want to leave. You had been waiting here so long, leaving would feel like giving up.

“You’re still here?” Jungkook’s voice drew you out of your thoughts, you glanced up to see him standing opposite from you, surprise on his face. He was dressed casually, hands in his pockets. He had come from the opposite direction of the studio, your jaw dropped a little.

“I… where were you?” You stammered out, he just shrugged. 

“Practice was cancelled so I went to dinner with the guys.”

You froze, he had a cold, uninterested look on his face. You blinked, feeling anger fire up on your stomach.

“What’s your problem?” You asked, straightening and folding your arms. Jungkook just stood there, an impassive look on his face.

“My problem?” He just repeated calmly, you nodded, feeling frustrated tears prick in your eyes. The hot, awful feeling of tears grew in your throat but you pushed on.

“You said we would talk,” You continued bravely. “I waited two hours for you.”

He just stared at you blankly, before shrugging. “Oh. Sorry.”

You stood there, your jaw dropping slightly in shock. 

“Sorry?” You repeated slowly. “Jungkook…” You broke off with a disbelieving laugh, before frowning, biting your words. You had to stay calm, not retaliate. “Jungkook, can we please talk now?”

He frowned at you. “I’m tired. Sorry.” He brushed past you, walking down the street. You stood there, letting is words sink in before you followed him closely. Anger was starting to bubble up inside of you, your throat still felt raw and hot, you knew you were on the verge of crying but you weren’t giving up. Not now.

“Jungkook, please. Can we talk?”

“You’re wasting your time, Y/N. Go home.”

“I’m trying here!” You suddenly snapped, reaching out and pulling his arm. He stopped walking, staring up at the sky silently. “I’m trying, Jungkook,” You continued, your voice cracking on your words. “All I’ve done is try.”

He was silent, his arms crossed, looking everywhere but you. 

You took advantage of his silence, stepping forward closer to him. “Jungkook… I’m sorry.”

He finally met your eyes, and for the first time there was no anger in his eyes. he just looked exhausted, drained. You felt fear seize you as he just stared at you.

“It doesn’t matter if you’re sorry or not.” He said quietly. The only sound between the two of you was silence, your breaths slowly getting more ragged.

“Jungkook…” You whispered. “Please.” You felt tears well up in your eyes, he kept staring at you tiredly. “I love you.” You said the words desperately, searching his face for anything. But he just stared at you, disappointment in the lines of his face.

“It doesn’t matter.” He said finally. You just stared at him, feeling your heart heavy in your chest. He had such a resigned look on his face, and the reality of everything was sinking in. There was no love in his face, just exhaustion. You had done this to him.

You took a slow step backwards, feeling a sob rise from your chest. You struggled to contain it, feeling your eyes sting with fresh tears. You just nodded, feeling your head bob and down robotically as you stared at the floor. You had fought as hard as you could. It was time to give up.

“Okay, I’ll leave.” You whispered, more to yourself than to him. You were crying now, tears trickling down your face, your entire throat felt raw from holding back the tears. 

“Y/N…” You heard Jungkook’s voice, low, injected with concern, but you shook your head furiously, looking up to meet his gaze. Your vision was blurred with tears and you stared at him. His face was open, pained, as he stared at you. You shook your head again, forcing a smile at him.

“It’s okay. I get it. I… I really am sorry.” You said as clearly as you could, feeling yourself start to shake. You had to leave, you had to get out of there before you broke down. He just stood there, staring at you with a raw look on his face before you whirled around, walking away as fast as your legs could take you.

You got home, and immediately collapsed against the wall, letting your body slide against the wall and crumple into the ground. Your eyes were red with tears but you weren’t crying, you were numb. 

He had said the words himself, it didn’t matter how sorry you were, it didn’t matter how hard you fought or tried to pretend the past didn’t matter. What happened had happened, and you would have to live with that forever. 

You knew in your heart you loved Jungkook and you would always love him. And for the first time, loving Jungkook hurt more than losing him.

There was a knock at the door.

You froze, feeling your breath catch in your throat. A dangerous flash of hope gripped your heart, you tried to dampen it as you stood up slowly. It won’t be him, you chanted to yourself as you opened the door.

It was him.

He was standing there, a tortured look in his eyes. He was slightly out of breath, his chest heaving with exertion as he stared at you. You just stared back, silence stretched out into what felt like hours. 

“I don’t even know what I’m doing here,” He confessed finally. And then you started crying.

Tears started falling down your face, and then you started to shake with the tears. HE stepped forward, cradling you into his arms. The feeling of him, the immediate gratification and comfort, made you cry harder.

“Shh,” He murmured, stroking your hair slowly. His voice was hoarse, a sign that you recognized, he was close to tears himself. “You know I can’t stand seeing you cry.” He whispered kindly, softly.

His words, the feeling of his hands slowly stroking your hair, had you crying even harder. The emotions of the last few months, the regret, the awful, insidious feeling that you had caused Jungkook so much hurt and yet he was the one holding you right now, all was too much. You cried into his shoulders, as he circled his arms around you, holding you together, keeping you safe. 

“I’m sorry Jungkook,” You tore out. You were sobbing, breaking down, gasping out desperately for air. Jungkook remained calm, just holding you. His hand stroked your hair rhythmically, and he kept his lips near your ear as he softly hummed. It was a tune you didn’t recognize but the vibrations of his chest and his melodic voice soothed you. 

Your tears slowed, and you stayed still, listening to his heart beat. You slowly pulled your head away from where it had been nestled into him, you glanced up to meet his eyes. His eyes, warm brown, and soft as ever, were teary. 

“Your jumper is covered in my tears, I’m sorry,” You whispered, swallowing. He just nodded at you, his stare intense as he reached up, brushing a stray strand of hair away from your face. 

“It’s okay.” He cupped your cheek, you leaned against his touch, letting your eyelids flutter closed. 

“Jungkook…” You whispered, saying his name out into the empty air like it was a promise. “I’m sorry.” He was quiet, hearing the unspoken words between you as he always had in the past. You opened your eyes, he was still staring at you with that intensity, as a tear rolled down his face. 

“I know. Don’t worry about me, I’m a tough guy. I’ll be fine.” He replied instead, giving you a tiny smile. The smile didn’t reach his eyes, you wanted to tell him he didn’t have to be strong now, that you were sorry anyway. But you couldn’t find the words.

You didn’t return his smile, the smile faded from his face as he stared into your eyes. You were still standing in his arms, your face tilted up to his.

“I’m a mess,” You said quietly, meeting his eyes steadily. He was silent, watching you. “You deserve better. I know that.” 

“You’re not a mess,” He responded softly. 

You shook your head. “I am.” You said, and then he leaned in and carefully brushed his lips against yours.

It was a different kiss to the one you had shared on the rooftop, it was slow, careful. He pulled away almost instantly, his eyes searching yours yet again. There was no anger there, just a yearning, and a sadness. You could sense that he had missed you as badly as you missed him. You curled a hand around the back of his neck, staring into his eyes, and you reached up and brought his face down to yours again, kissing him.

Your kiss was slow, one of those kisses so infused with intimacy that it literally took your breath away. He kissed you softly, you had your hand around the back of his neck, his hands fluttered up to your face and cupped you closer to him. All you could hear were his soft breaths, his quiet murmurs as you kissed, your heart pounding in your chest.

“Y/N.” He breathed out your name in the midst of your kiss, you pulled away a little to look at him. his eyes were still red with tears but he had a soft look in his eyes, his guard was slipping and vulnerability was all over his face as he looked down at you.

At the sound of his voice saying your name, you felt something jump inside of you. You had been longing for him for so long, hearing him affirm your deepest desires, saying your name, had you quietly buzzing. 

You leaned up and kissed him again, deeper, entangling his tongue with yours and pressing yourself slowly but firmly against him. He responded, running his strong hands down from your face down to your neck, down to your shoulders, giving them a soft squeeze. His touch was careful, but searching. You had forgotten what his body felt like, he had forgotten yours, and he was trying to remember it again.

He reached behind the two of you, closing the door. The soft click as it closed had your heart beating louder in anticipation, and he leaned down, picking you up. He had always been strong, but he had gotten stronger, and he picked you up with ease. His strong arms encircled you as he walked the two of you over to the couch, laying you down. You gazed up at him as he slowly brushed the hair away from your face, staring down at you before meeting your lips in another kiss, settling his body down on top of yours.

You were both silent, you didn’t speak, you just kissed. You were lost in the feeling of him, you had forgotten this, how he felt when he kissed you. He kissed you passionately, as if his soul was searching for yours, his hands tracing the outlines of your body. You felt like your heart was singing, a slow, dazed beat in your head reminded you that this was really happening. 

His body was warm and strong on top of yours, the most real reminder that this was happening, otherwise you could’ve easily been convinced this was a dream. You slowly traced the outline of him with your fingers, enthralling at his strong shoulders, his sculpted stomach, his forearms which gripped the couch armrest, ensuring his body hovered above yours without crushing you. 

He was familiar, yet foreign, and it excited you. All you had done was kiss, slowly, and stare at him, but you were feeling so alive, electricity crackling across your skin, a heavy thud between your legs. You wanted him so badly already, you could feel it in your fingers and your toes, the desire for him.

He broke away from your lips to plant a soft kiss on the corner of your mouth, than against the base of your neck, against your pulsepoint, then trailing kisses down the slope of your neck. You gasped out a little at the feeling, he responded by lowering himself firmer down onto you, you could feel him between your legs and he was aroused, as ready for you as you were for him.

He stared into your eyes, his eyes were darkened in lust. It was all familiar, yet it had been so long, your body was calling for him, craving him.

He reached down and pulled the hoodie and teeshirt off of his body in one smooth motion, you swallowed thickly as your eyes took him in. he was better than your fantasies had reminded you, he had been working out and he was muscular, his shoulders rippling as he shifted his weight on top of you, his stomach tensed. He watched you as your eyes roamed across him, before meeting his stare. 

“Wow,” You just whispered, his eyes glowed a little at your words and then he reached down and gripped the hem of your dress.

You sat up as he gently pulled it off your head, his eyes immediately on every curve of you as he threw the dress to the ground. You felt exposed under his stare, but in a good way. He was drinking you in as you had with him, and when he met your eyes, there was an intensity in them you had never seen before.

Suddenly he was grabbing you and kissing you, intensely now, desperately. You could feel your desire for him coursing through your veins, through your blood, and you knew that you needed him. You wanted to be as close to him as you could, you wanted to express to him that you loved him, that you would always love him. 

He kissed down your neck, reaching behind you to clip off your bra. He fumbled a little, you pushed on his chest and got up, moving so you were straddling him. You clipped off your bra and let is fall to the ground, you guided his hand to his jeans and he responded instantly, unzipping and kicking them off. He was completely naked underneath you, his head tilted back to stare at you. Your legs were wrapped around his, his body sinking into the couch. 

You didn’t speak, not wanting to break this spark, this feeling between the two of you, the intensity. You didn’t need words, you just reached down and closed the space between the two of you with a kiss.

His hands curved up from your hips, skimming over your stomach until they found your breasts. His touch was gentle, lightly tracing the outline of your breasts and your nipples, which were hard with arousal. His touch was so light, so bare, that it had you softly moaning into his mouth. He was being careful with his touch, so slow, but you could feel how hard his erection was in his pants. You knew he wanted you, badly, yet he was fighting that to touch you slowly, carefully. He was treasuring your body with his touch.

You reached down and pulled off your underwear, shifting your legs so you could throw them behind you onto the floor. He kissed your chest, planting soft careful kisses around your breasts, his strong fingers reaching between the two of you and carefully caressing your clit. His touch was slow and teasing, his eyes were on your face. The moment his fingers were touching your wetness you felt your body tighten in want, you were already so wet for him, you could feel your core throbbing. 

He just met your gaze and then kissed you, his arms around your waist as he suddenly flipped your body on it’s back, his body pressing on top of yours.

The feeling of his bare skin on yours had you sighing out, he positioned himself at your entrance and was stroking your hair. You reached down and wrapped your fingers around his length, gently pumping up and down. He was so hard, you could feel it underneath your touch, precum already on the tip of his dick.

He wanted you so badly, yet he had been slow, careful, memorizing your body with his hands and his eyes and mouth. He let out a soft moan, you glanced up at him. he had his eyes closed, and the look on his face, blissful, had your heart swelling. It was as strong as the lust you were feeling, you loved him, God you loved him.

“Jungkook, I want you,” you whispered to him, his eyes fluttered open and they met yours. You were aware that your eyes were a little teary, but they were a good kind of tears, emotional, and he smiled, kissing you before he slowly slid himself inside of you.

He took it slow, easing inside of you, but you still groaned out. It had been months, and you were tight, he stretched out your walls, his knuckles gripping the couch as he let out a low, deep moan. Your legs wrapped around his waist, you had your eyes closed as you let yourself get lost at the sensation of his dick getting buried within you.

He felt incredible, so full, he stayed inside of you for a moment, the two of you just relishing how it felt, before he slowly started rocking his hips in and out of you. 

You whimpered at the feeling, his hands fluttered by your face, gently cupping your cheek before down to your neck, gently tracing your neck with his fingers, gently resting around your neck before gripping your chin and running his fingers against your full lips. The feeling had you gasping out, he was staring down at you, a strained look in his face, pleasure rippling across his face with each motion of his hips.

He started pumping into you with more force, holding the small of your back, the other arm propping himself upright so he could push all of himself inside of you. You lifted your hips against him, wanting to feel all of him inside of you. He felt incredible, his hands entangling in your hair as he pumped into you, his eyes never leaving your face. 

He was having sex with you, taking dominant control of your body, yet his touch was still so gentle, that it had you writhing underneath him, murmuring out desperately.

He leaned down between the two of you, massaging your clit with two of his fingertips, alternating his rhythm to have your entire body quivering. He knew exactly how to make your body respond, and his touch had you moaning out loudly. 

“Jungkook,” You breathed out, you couldn’t stop yourself from saying his name. He grunted, getting into rhythm, pumping into you with his fingers on your clit, the feeling had your entire body clenched, your vision was beginning to blur from the sheer intensity of it, of him. 

“I’m going to come Jungkook, oh….” You cut off your sentence with a loud moan, feeling your orgasm clench inside your core as you moaned loudly, your legs tightening as waves of pleasure and intensity and satisfaction washed over you, tension draining into and out of your body at the same time. He slowed his touch, but kept rocking into you, you leaned forward and bit down onto his collarbone, moaning into his skin as you rode out your orgasm.

“Say my name again,” He murmured, you smiled blissfully into his skin.

“Jungkook,” You breathed, curling your fingers up to lace between his neck, gently pushing so you were on top of him, still inside of him. He was staring at you with wide, intense eyes. 

“Jungkook,” You repeated, leaning down to nip at his neck and his earlobe. You were still glowing from your orgasm as you rocked your hips in and out of his, riding him slowly, intensely. You arched your back, making sure all of him was grinding inside of you, he just groaned out loudly at the feeling.

“I…” He stammered out, “I’m close, kiss me, Y/N…” 

You leaned down, kissing him passionately, pulling away to stare into his eyes as he came inside of you, his features scrunching up at the intensity of his orgasm, his legs twitching and body tensing as he gripped onto your hips.

You watched as the orgasm took over his face, ebbing away and leaving him with a satisfied smile. You smiled yourself, flopping down on top of him, resting your face on his chest and listening to his heart beat.

Comfortable silence stretched out between the two of you, you slowly eased yourself out of him, reaching above his head for a box of tissues and between your legs, dabbing away his cum. He watched you, his eyes soft, as you sat up, grabbing the blanket you kept by the couch and draping it over the two of you.

You lay on your side on the couch, beside him, he shifted so he was facing you. His face was open, soft, as he stared at you.

“Jungkook,” You began quietly, you didn’t want to disturb this between the two of you, the tranquility, but the thought of waking up without him here was too confronting. 

“Will you stay?” You were tense, waiting on his answer.

He searched your eyes, before he nodded. Relief poured through you.

“You’re my weakness,” He said softly, his eyes slightly tinged in pain. You just nodded, staring at him. He was so beautiful like this, his hair messy, no make up, his eyes a little conflicted.

“I’ll give you another chance,” He said quietly, decisively, You weren’t touching, except for your legs, which were tangled in his. The blanket was wrapped up around the two of you, and it felt, warm, safe. He said the words into the still air.

“You will?” You whispered, feeling tears spring to your eyes. your heart was swelling, it was so full you felt like it was going to burst. “Thank you, I promise, I will work on this, I will work on us,” you whispered urgently, he just nodded. 

“I’ll give you another chance… but only if it’s on my terms. I need to do this my way.”

You just nodded desperately, he nodded back, leaning forward to kiss the tip of your nose. It was a simple gesture, affectionate, and it made you smile as he pulled away, wrapping an arm around your waist and pulling you close into his arms. 

His breathing slowed, you could tell he was tired, falling asleep. You lay against his chest, feeling more awake than ever, with more questions than ever.

Jungkook was giving you another chance, he was here now, he was staying. 

You had told yourself you would do anything for him and you had him again. You looked up at his face, he was asleep, lashes fluttering with each breath. Your heart ached with happiness, he was here, in your arms.

Yet, you couldn’t help but remember the pain in his eyes. The pain hadn’t left and you couldn’t help but recall his words, that he would give you another chance, on his terms, in his way.

You had Jungkook’s name on your lips, tucked into his body as you yawned. A pang of worry hit you all of the sudden, you shuddered, closing your eyes.

And you wondered to yourself before you drifted off to sleep, what exactly ‘his terms’ entailed.

AN: ♡ this chapter was hard to write, even with a happy(ish) ending. I have a feeling the next one will be even harder... Part 5 is going to be JK angst heavy!