#and then yell at people about their perfectly normal relationships because it makes you upset

[ceratedfish24]

My least favorite kinds of people are people who are like “ew flower husbands is so toxic” but think that Jimmy/Joel or Jimmy/fWhip are any less toxic. Joel and fWhip are easily a thousands times meaner than Scott, which is perfectly fine because it’s a joke and Jimmy has stated a thousand times that he thinks it’s great and fine. “Oh but when they do it, it’s with affection” okay??? Do you think Scott is doing it without affection??? Do you think he actually thinks poorly of Jimmy??? They’re friends, bro.

[mixelation]

Just thought of smth. How do you headcannon the lgbt situation in Mutagenicity? Because I'm imagining Deidara and Itachi getting into one of their usual fights and Tori yelling "Would you two just kiss already?!" which then prompts the following reactions

Itachi who's been raised as a good little breeding stud for the Uchiha and Konoha as a whole "Don't be ridiculous Tori, two people of the same gender cannot be in a romantic partnership. How would we secure future generations of shinobi?"

Deidara who's a result of one of those breeding programs and is done with the whole thing "Ugh, with that asshole? Please I like to think i have some taste."

And Kushina who's been suppressing her desire to make out with Itachi's mom since grade school because of her own insecurities about being the last of a clan "Now now boys, it's perfectly natural to want to wrestle your friends into the dirt and have your way with them, but you have to stop it when you get older so you can make lots of cute babies, dattebane!"

Ha!

Personally my preference for Naruto fics is that people are largely cool with same gender relationships. That being said, sexism definitely exists in ninjaland, so certainly there's going to be some expectations about how romantic/sexual relationship "should" work. In Mutagenicity specifically, Itachi has been brought up with the idea that he needs to eventually marry someone with a working womb and produce a child.

However, I've been thinking about this more like... It's normal for ninja off stuck at war to have relationships with each other, and ninja skew male, so gay sex (especially among men) is pretty normalized. Then you get home from war and actually the dude you've been hooking up with is also your best friend who's saved your life twice, and you move in together and hold hands in public sometimes and no one will bat an eye. Gay dating maybe gets an eyebrow raise but for rando ninja, no one really cares. People only start having Opinions on your relationships if 1) you have a bloodline limit, or 2) you have specific clan duties related to having a biological child (so, you have a bloodline limit or some other heritable traits valuable to your clan, OR you have some sort of responsibility to make an heir). For Itachi, he both has a ""strong"" sharingan his clan wants him to pass on, AND he's supposed to make himself an heir.

People like Sasuke and Shisui, who are NOT heirs but are important Uchiha also with "strong" sharingan, probably have some expectations/social pressure from both the clan and society at large to make sharingan babies, but they could probably settle down with a man without causing a huge fallout. At some point Deidara will probably start getting weird comments about if his children will inherit things, but he doesn't have his own clan to pressure him and I can't see Minato's administration actively pushing him. Kushina almost definitely felt like she needed her own child to continue the Uzumaki, which is why she went for a super risky pregnancy over adoption, but also I think she and Minato also just.... really wanted a kid and their own little family, regardless. Like they make sure Naruto gets her clan name and not Minato's to continue that, but neither of them are upset Naruto didn't inherit the Uzuamki bloodline limit. Naruto is there because they love each other and just want a kid. If Kushina had fallen in love with a woman instead and wanted to marry her, I think she would have just gone "whatever, I'm marrying who I want because I do what I want, and I'll figure out getting a sperm donor later."

So, for Mutagenicity, it would be semi-fine if Itachi were gay and had a side piece who's his "real" romantic partner; he just needs the official wife and heir for political/pass-on-the-sharingan reasons. If he really wanted to, he could probably pull a "well, I'm clan head, and I say I want a husband," and then everyone would be mad for decades and the clan would insist he make a baby via surrogate (this is the Homemade Dynamite route, BTW, except all the clan elders are dead and Mikoto supports Itachi marrying Deidara because who else could possibly handle her freak son). However, Mutagenicity!Itachi isn't gay; he's asexual. He's shit out of luck. His lung condition does mean the clan is like "uuuuh well maybe it's time to bring in some outside genes--" so if he tricks the one woman he knows who's his age and can also stand hanging out with him into dating him, everyone will leave him alone--

Anyway, I think everyone on Team 4 knows same gender relationships are an option. I do think Itachi is very bad at recognizing he can have what he wants, so he might not consider it's an option for him specifically.... but Mutagenicity!Itachi specifically isn't super into men, because he's not really into anyone.*

*I think I do have meta somewhere where Itachi's like "why can't I just marry Shisui :(" and this thought isn't because Itachi is attracted to Shisui, it's because Shisui is someone Itachi cares about deeply, gets along with, and therefore he can see himself enjoying living with for the rest of his life. If Shisui fulfilled the requirement of "can give birth," Itachi would marry him in a second.

[honorthysalad]

I'm too tired for a proper introduction. I don't like yoshiki's dad and how he's being portrayed in the manga.

Before ch25, the most we see of yoshiki's dad is from the hgsn light novel’s bonus chapter, wherein we get a lot of focus on the disparity between parental roles and how mothers are expected to care solely for the children while fathers are expected to work for the family. Like that's the problem with their relationship: Yoshiki’s mom wants her husband to *care* about their kids and Yoshiki’s father thinks that solely because he’s their father that the amount of care he’s showing (almost none) is acceptable. She goes up to him, asks if he thinks it's okay that Kaoru isn't going to school, and he just further pushes the responsibility onto her by telling her that surely as Kaoru’s mother she knows best. She presses more for his opinion, and he continues to refuse to think about it, becoming frustrated when she pushes back to the point that when the argument is done he’s hitting tables and slamming doors like a child because talking to his wife 'annoys' him so much.

And the thing is that Yoshiki's mom still currently works. She has a job and is expected to do all the housework and decision making for the kids on top of that, and Yoshiki's dad is the one who is stubbornly clinging to these typical roles because it's upsetting for him when it's pointed out that he's failing as a parent. His wife is practically begging him to care, and he just refuses.

(And it makes sense the disparity gets focused on here because Len didn’t write it.)

ANYWAY, looking at this, it makes perfect sense why Yoshiki doesn't want to talk to his dad. His dad doesn't want to talk to him, slams doors when he gets confronted with the idea he may have to *think* about his kids, and so, if Yoshiki's dad wants to be absent from Yoshiki's life, Yoshiki wants him to be absent too- in all forms. From the moles he's inherited to the supposed similarities between them, Yoshiki wants nothing to do with him.

(There's a misconception going around that Yoshiki's dad beats him. This is from a mistranslation of the light novel; Yoshiki's dad only hits objects. Feel free to write him however you want tho, I know I hardly stick to canon lol. I just wanted to preemptively avoid ppl informing me of that)

But if you’ve only read the manga, then why doesn’t Yoshiki like his father? He… knocked over a glass once maybe? Looked real pathetic getting yelled at? Grabbed Yoshiki’s arm and said some vague stuff about the unuki. In the past people told Yoshiki he was like him. That's what we got of Yoshiki's dad before ch25.

Then in ch25, Yoshiki's dad is some like... idfk? Pathetic little guy who wants to spend time with his family but he doesn't feel like he has a place to belong in the house :( I mean sure he's clearly in the house at a normal time when everyone else is in the house so it's not like he's working insane hours and can never see them, but didn't you know he's so scared of his wife :(((( and look he's actually not a bad parent cuz one time he read Yoshiki a book, and he's got an artistic side cuz he wanted to be a novelist, and he's such a funny little clumsy guy :) also he's got himself a little family tree with daddy issues of his own :))

I'd almost entertain that this is him putting up an act around yoshiki like yoshiki's mom says, but it's pretty unlikely from what we see of him in extras. Len wants us to see him as a person who just struggles to assert himself and that's what causing the breakdown of the family, not what the light novel presents where he asserts himself with his actions, and what he's saying he doesn't care about the family.

It's just kind of frustrating because I liked the examination in the light novel, highlighting the flaws in what’s assumed as a normal family dynamic in Japan, and I think it perfectly fits the themes HGSN explores with maintaining flawed traditions that only work on the surface. In turn what we’ve got in the manga is just… muddled and weird.

[gemini-sensei]

Can you do a Robby with a pregnant!single mom!reader please?

Yes! 🥺🥺 yes I can

Fem!Reader ○ mentioned cheating/asshole ex ○ headcanons/blurb ○ unedited

Robby meets Reader at the mall amidst her finding out her baby daddy has been cheating on her. She's only four months along, but she's holding her belly and crying beyond the normal pregnancy hormones. It's a whole scene that people are watching that the other girl is less than happy to be caught in the middle of, equally hurt because Mr. Douchebag didn't tell her he was in any kid of relationship, let alone having gotten another girl pregnant.

It's a mess, one that comes to a head when Reader practically yells, "Why would you do this? We're having a baby!"

And her boyfriend tells her, "You mean you're having a baby!"

When her now ex boyfriend yells at her, that's when Robby steps in because he's had enough. It's one thing to cause a scene, but yelling at a pregnant girl crosses all his lines. He gets between them and tells the guy to just get out of there because clearly he's making things worse. It's almost too easy to get him to leave, the other girl already left because she didn't want to be there after realizing she was, well, the other woman. (dude didn't deserve her time either.)

Robby then turns to Reader and leads her away from all the eyes and commotion. Things around them go back to as they were as he sits her down at the food court in hopes to calm her and gets her some napkins to dry her eyes with.

As he sits with her, he asked, "Are you okay? ...that's kind of a stupid question. I mean, you're obviously upset."

It makes her giggle through the tears and she shrugs to the question. "I guess I'll have to be."

She rubs her belly, which is far more noticeable because she's wearing a summer dress and it highlights her bump perfectly. It's really pretty, he thinks, but doesn't know if he should say anything. It didn't feel like the time for compliments, especially about her clothes. Especially from strangers.

"Oh, shit! I'm sorry," he said and licked his lips. His cool attitude is just gone and he's left looking like a total dork. "I'm Robby."

She giggled and introduces herself, happy to make his acquaintance despite how they met. It's not exactly a fairytale, but it's how it all got started.

As the weeks go on, Robby and Reader get closer. He tells her about karate and his friends and she tells him all about her interests and the baby.

He was a little awkward about the baby talk to begin with, in all honesty, because he hasn't been around many babies. Young kids, like elementary age, sure, but that was mostly because they liked to watch him skate and do tricks. Other than that, he's not exactly sure how to act around kids. But he gets used to it and even asks her questions from time to time, like if she knows if the baby is a boy or girl and if they've kicked yet.

(Just an aside because I want to talk about it more, but I love it when a person is just out and about doing their hobby or whatever and kids flock to them just to watch. I love this idea with Robby and little kids. It's just too cute not to think about because he wouldn't know what to do with that attention at first but then get used to it as they cheer him on and ask him to do tricks. They'd want to try it out but he'd be too worried to let them because they need helmets and pads; if he could, he'd let them use his but they're too big. I just- I could go on lol. But back to your regularly scheduled content.)

Robby tells himself that he's not falling for Reader, that he can't fall for her. She has a lot going on already, he can't add onto that. Plus, when her kid arrives, she should be focussed on them. So he tells himself he doesn't like her in that way and keeps things friendly between them. If she ever notices him looking at her a certain way, she doesn't say anything, but she always gets this big smile on her face whenever he comes around and it's so cute. He's dense and doesn't realize she's started to like him and might be dropping hints every now and again about it.

When it comes to baby stuff, he's got nothing. Again, he doesn't know much - if anything - about babies. However, if Reader asks hims for help with putting something together or hanging something or just carrying something into her house, he's all for it. He's designated himself to be her muscle and with everything he learned from Mr. LaRusso - who knows how to anchor shit to the wall as opposed to his dad - he's able to put up all the decorations she wants. He tells her he can build the furniture too, you know 'cause he's already there so why not? But when she steps out of the room, he calls Mr. L and asks him questions about some things. The directions should be straightforward but they're really not...

As time goes on, Robby and Reader kind of slip into casual intimacy. They sit together anywhere and his arm ends up around her; when they're walking up or down stairs, he takes her hand but then never lets it go; he carries her books or her bag for her so she doesn't have to. It's all these little things that add up over time, but they don't even really notice.

That is until they're hanging out, watching a movie, and she's cuddled up to him and his hands are on her belly and he just realizes like 'when did that happen?' Especially since before that, he was averse and worried to touching her belly. It just kind of weirded him out (you know, like when Spencer was freaked out when JJ was pregnant in Criminal Minds? It was something like that). He realizes he likes it even though he can feel the baby squirming around in here.

Of all people to make Robby open his eyes to what was going on, it was Johnny. He sat Robby down and started asking questions, which made Robby think he had to explain that the baby wasn't his, but Johnny already knew that.

"We're just friends, that's all." "Man, and here I thought you were smarter than me." Robby just kind of gives him a glaring look that says what are you on about? "Friends don't look at each other like that, Robby. And they especially don't cuddle everywhere they go." "She's pregnant." "She likes you."

Robby what's to deny it just because Johnny said it, but once it's been pointed out to him, he can't not think about it. He wants to it be true so badly, so when they're hanging out one day, he tries to act like everything is normal, but he's a little stiff when she cuddles up to him. She looks up at him and asks if he's okay, and of course he says yes, but she knows better.

So she confronts him about it and he gets a little bashful, admitting that he likes her as more than a friend. He feels a little ridiculous as he's looking at her and her heavily pregnant belly, and here he is telling her he likes her. He's ready to get laughed at, thinking his dad is wrong about all of this, but then she smiles and asks, "really?"

"I mean, yeah. How could I not like you?"

She doesn't even answer him because it's a bit of a ridiculous question, one she can come up with a million answers for; being fat and pregnant at the top of the list. Instead, she kisses him. It's a short, sweet kiss but Robby's heart is just ready to burst. All those little touches, little acts of kindness that were a bit more, indeed add up, and they can't be happier with the result.

[mrpenguinpants]

Razor:  Jealous HCs

Hey anon!! As much frustration I hold for crippling oblivious couples, I also love the trope so much. Plus I adore Razor. Even though I try to not call Razor a dog, I still google “jealous dog traits”. Also, I found out both Hanniejji and I secretly HCs Bennet is friends with Razor and Fischl. If genshin won’t give me character interactions then I’ll write it myself.

---

Semi Part 1: General HCs

Semi Part 2: Pre-Relationship HCs

Semi Part 3: Cuddle HCs

[Masterlist]

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[taglist]  <- if you want to be added, please read this first.

 @mikeysbike @unionwitch @musekala @sunnshiii @stanzastic @akaasea @xoneaboveallx @adoring-ghost @asheseiler @childelover @dilucsz @dai-tsukki-desu @thicmitten @nonniechan @htnicayh @genshins1mpact @morthecreator @ aanne2601 @hanniejji​

Razor:  Jealous HCs

Bennet and Fischl are both foaming at the mouth at how deeply in love you BOTH are and yet you’re both equally blind. Fischl wants to grab you by the shoulders and yell at you that Razor returns your feelings and you need to stop doing whatever it is you’re doing. A sad Razor looks like a kicked puppy and even she can’t handle it. But Razor absolutely refuses for anyone to confess for him because he believes that you might just genuinely be uninterested in him. Plus, it wouldn’t feel right if he couldn’t confess himself. It’s his first love, this is important to him.

Bennet thinks it’s really sweet that his friend is in love. Even if he does get a bit pouty that whenever he get’s hurt, Razor will ask if he’s alright and leave it at that. But if you accidently trip Razor is already at your side and fussing over you. Bennet uses this as physical proof that yes, your feelings are returned and this man is in love with you, but you always brush it off as Razor’s nature to be caring. He’s smiling patiently on the outside but on the inside he has his hands in his hair and he’s screaming.

God forbid anything upsets you. Razor hasn’t been around other humans long enough to pick up on most social cues but he does have a good sense of smell. If you’re happy then the wind smells like sweet flowers. If you’re upset then it smells like mint. While Razor usually keeps himself in check and is somewhat indifferent, the second he catches any signs of distress from you he’s on high alert. Until you tell him what’s been bothering you - a group of hilichurls stole your bag of snapdragon flowers - he’s going to be on guard and stressed out. He’s already throwing his claymore over his shoulder to go and fight the monsters that tried to upset you. Wow, what a good friend you say to Fischl. Fischl is ready to punt you off a cliff.  

Razor tries his best to show that he likes you by bringing the things you need and looking like such a proud pup. He looks at you with such hopeful eyes that it takes you a second to register what he’s asking before you feel your own heart rate speed up and pound into your ears. You flush pink before you move to embrace him and ruffle his hair as praise as he nuzzles into your shoulder affectionally. You assume his affectious actions are apart of his wolf nature and how they act so you try not to read too deep into things. Even if Razor seems a bit too happy to be hugging you and receiving pets. Or the fact he doesn’t let anyone else pet him...

Bennet tries his best to help his friend out by giving Razor some advice but considering Bennet himself hasn’t been in a relationship yet, it’s all practical. Telling Razor that he’s seen couples bring each other flowers as a sign of affection, maybe Razor could find some plants to bring you? It ends horribly when he offers you a wolfhook and you just stare at him. He says that these are his feelings towards you but you’re just...so confused?? Wolfhooks have thorns so does that mean he thinks you’re clingy? Isn’t that a bad thing? Are you annoying to him?? But wolfhooks also symbolize wolves so is he saying you’re like family to him??? You’re internally screaming while debating if you just got family-zoned or if Razor is trying to subtly tell you that he doesn’t like you.

Just because Razor is, somehow, unsure if you actually like him or not. That doesn’t mean he doesn’t get incredibly jealous and possessive at any unknown presence. He’s still a bit wary of the City due to all the conflicting smells and noises but he can’t help but look so sad when you have to run errands and you can’t visit him. But when you mention that a really nice knight gifted you a flower does Razor see red. He gave you a flower?? Shouldn’t you be happy with his? Why do you need another one when you have his? Is his gift not good enough? Is this your way of saying you’re interested in someone else? This poor boy is on the verge of either running off to go sulk or find the man that gave you this flower, which up until his knowledge - courtesy of Bennet - is a sign of courting, and absolutely destroy him to prove he’s the better partner.

He tries to keep it under wraps since he's been told that while in the City, he needs to exercise restrain and understand that if he enters. He's expected to at least respect the laws and people. But this poor wolf is so feral over this new development and this new smell that's been clinging onto you that whatever worries and isolation issues Razor felt about the city flies out the window as his protective instincts kick into overdrive. He sees other people and even pets as a rival for your attention and love. He just wants to scoop you up and growl at everything as a message to say “this is mine, go get your own”.

Even when the both of you are far away from the city, Razor’s continued mood seems to hang heavy over both your heads. You’re not sure what exactly caused Razor to be on high alert. He’s snapping and growling at everything little thing that comes close, even a butterfly!

You abruptly stop walking to Razor’s surprise as you whip around and frown at him. He can feel a chill run up his spine as he stands perfectly straight as you study him before you hold your palm out and looked at him expectantly. He looks at your hand with a small spark of perked attention before his nose twitches and he goes back to sulking. You’re still waiting for him as he shuffles a bit, his hair that resembled a wolf ear is twitching, before he whines and trots over and places his chin on your palm. He’s looking up at you with the most kicked puppy expression and you don’t even know what you did but you feel like the worse person in all of Teyvat.

“Razor...what’s gotten into you?” you ask gently as you rub circles into his cheek as he nuzzles into your palm. He seems really conflicted as his eyes dart away from your face and he almost looks guilty. He just whines and turns and buries his face into your warm palm. You’ve never really seen him like that before as you awkwardly try and comfort him. Until the same flower slips out of your pocket and you hear something primal growl out of Razor. His teeth are pulled back and he snarls at the flower as his pupils dilate. You quickly get between him and the poor flower before Razor tries to do anything.

“Seriously Razor, what’s gotten into you?” you asked concerned. He quickly shifts his attention to you as he pounces and knocks you over. You left off a soft noise as the wind get’s knocked out of you but you peep when his hands cage you from above. Razor’s red eyes bore into yours and you’re suddenly thinking the air is getting too hot. 

“Do you like Razor?” he asks, tilting his head in a cute pout. It makes you internally coo before you quickly snap out of it. Stay focused! 

“Of course I do! Remember we talked about this?” you say as you remember back to your previous interactions but this only seems to frustrate Razor more.

“No. Not that like. More...” Razor struggles with his words as he tries to piece together the right string of sounds to try and convey what he’s feeling. He seems so conflicted that it breaks your heart a bit. So you reach up and gently rub behind his ear as he closes his eyes and relaxes. He breathes in deeply as his eyes open and his pupils return to normal, but vastly determined.

“Together. Always. Just...us,” Razor says softly as he looks at you hopefully. There’s a small pink dust to his cheeks as his fang digs into his lip in nervousness. You’re not sure why but your heart absolutely sky rockets at it and you can feel your face flush pink.

“Um, yes?” you nod along, you think you’re understanding what he’s trying to say. Maybe he was just upset you were spending so much time in the City and away from him that he felt your friendship was neglected? That would make you really upset. But the way he phrases his words makes you believe that perhaps...

Before you can think more on it. Razor’s face breaks into a grin that nearly blinds you from the pure affection that sprouts from it. He’s already hugging you harder as he starts rubbing his nose and cheek against your neck. Making soft and happy sounds as he nuzzles you. He’s never done that before but you assume he’s just so happy. You breath a sigh of relief that it appears that your message to him was clear enough.

Yeah of course, friends always, you think

Lupical. Partner. Mate, Razor thinks.

---

whistling as I pretend I don’t see your stares. Yeah ik but it’s ok. This is a sorta semi series. We’ll build upon it. But Xiao content is next lol. I’m taking inspiration from this. I mean, when I don’t feel like shit 😷

I’ve been listening to [  Softy - Dear Moon ]. This isn’t the usual kind of music I listen to but it came on shuffle and this is now my mental breakdown song.

Quick edit: Turns out this is an ost from “My Mister”. I’ve never been into kdramas (I think I’ve only seen goblin, she was pretty, and Hwarang) but the cover picture looks so upsetting? My friend is really into tgcf and I believe that had a live action as well. 

[bts-reveries]

feelings | 8.5

“Welcome to my dorm~” You say, moving out of the way to let Hobi walk in. He looks around, nodding his head.

“I know, it’s messy, but I didn’t really have much time to clean. I thought you’d be away from campus right now,” you say, closing the door and walking by him. When you texted, he happened to be right outside the dorm building. He laughs at you.

“It’s fine, really. The boys are much worse than this.” He sits down at the foot of your bed. “Is there a reason why you invited me over?”

“Yes! Actually. I wanted to talk with you,” you tell him as you sit down beside him. “I didn’t have anyone else to talk about it with and out of the group, I’d feel like you’d be the best person to help.”

“What is it about exactly?” Hobi asks, turning his body to face you. You could already tell that he would give you solid advice by the way he looks eager to listen. 

“My feelings.. About Jungkook.. I- I usually talk to him about everything and … well this is about him so I can’t. And I can’t talk about this to Jin, because I feel like he’s helping him out and so his advice would be biased.” Hobi smiles at this, but you didn’t notice because you were looking away from his face. “And, well, Taehyung would want us to be together, so his advice wouldn’t be helpful at all. Lastly, I don’t know if Jimin would even give good advice! He’s good at math, but I just have a feeling he’d suck at this,” you say, turning back to look at Hobi. He has a big smile on his face now.

“What?” you ask him, awkwardly scratching your arm.

“Okay, well first of all, I’m honored that I’m the one you’re trusting with this. Which is a valid choice considering all the reasons you mentioned about the boys. They are correct. They made a group chat with all of us in it, without you, to help Jungkook out.”

“REALLY?” you yell out of surprise, making Hobi jump a little. “Oh my gosh, I’m sorry,” you say, putting your hand on his arm, letting out a giggle. You didn’t know he was jumpy. “But ugh, I knew it!”

“I saw the messages before I got here, they were texting in the group chat. I haven’t gotten to respond because your message popped up for me to come over. But I saw that Jungkook was a little upset that you left or he thinks he might’ve scared you off.”

“Noo, ugh, it’s not his fault, it’s mine,” you say, burying your face into your hands. You drag your hands down just slightly for your palms to cup your cheeks. “He was being his normal self but I was overthinking everything. And I’m sure the guys are giving him advice on what to do but it honestly felt like we were doing the same thing we always do. Does that make sense? 

It’s just… now that I know that he likes me, they started feeling different. Like we always go on breakfast dates and cuddle when watching movies.. But for some reason my mind is going everywhere and I can’t focus on what we’re doing.”

“It seems like you’re starting to like him,” Hobi says. His face was serious. 

“No,” you say.

“Is it wrong to like him?” Hobi asks you. You nod. 

“He’s my best friend,” you say. “If I like him, I’d lose my best friend.”

“No you won’t. He likes you, and if you like him, you’d both like each other. You would have a best friend, and a boyfriend.”

“But what if something happens? What if our relationship doesn’t work out?”

“Then if you two have loved each other enough, you can just go back to being friends.”

“That sounds easier said than done,” you say with a slight laugh. “How can you go back to before like nothing happened.”

“Some people were able to go back to being just friends and end up perfectly fine,” Hobi says. 

“That’s just some people. Just because it’s happened to someone, doesn’t mean it’ll happen to me.” Hobi quirks an eyebrow at you and starts to slowly smile.

You furrow your brows at him. “What…”

“I wasn’t going to mention it, but since you said that, I will,” he laughs. You started to get nervous. “When we were out getting ice cream yesterday, I asked you if Jungkook and you were together and you said no. Then I said, oh, you two would look like a cute couple and you laughed and said we could never be together and I said why not? and you said my friends in high school dated each other and it didn’t work out and it ended up breaking our friend group apart, i don’t want that to happen to me and Jungkook.” Your eyes widened as he said it word for word.

“You just said just because it’s happened to someone, doesn’t mean it’ll happen to me,” Hobi says. “What are you doing right now? You like him don’t you?”

๑๑๑๑๑๑๑

feelings

๑ part eight.five: word for word ๑

pairings: jungkook x reader

a/n: 🧍🏻‍♀️thoughts?

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[chaotic-jjk-fiction]

Jujutsu Kaisen Yandere Profiles

TW: Yandere and all things that come with yanderes, kidnapping, mentions of starvation, mentions of abuse, a lot of manipulation talk, threats of suicide

This profile includes Getou Suguru, Gojo Satoru, Nanami Kento, Choso, Noritoshi Kamo, and Yuuta Okkotsu. I will be happy to profile other characters if you want!

This profile is based off @ddarker-dreams​ yandere “MBTI” type. Find the post HERE

Getou Suguru: 

Cruel, Aware, Manipulative, and Lenient

Suguru airs on the more cruel side of the yandere spectrum and is definitely aware of what he is doing. In fact, he prides himself on how well he can manipulate you. Due to his confidence that he has you trained, he is a bit looser when it comes to your restrictions, compared to some of the other people that is. He definitely has a list of rules you have to follow, and if you break them there will be a punishment meeting the severity of the rule you broke. However, he prefers to keep you compliant with emotional manipulation rather than physical abuse, but that does not mean he will not raise a hand to you if he feels he has to. 

Gojo Satoru: 

Reverent, Delusional, Manipulative, and Strict

Satoru is a more reverent yandere which paired with his delusions about the relationship. He is possessive to a point where it is suffocating and he slowly takes away more of your freedoms, all the while telling you it’s only for your good. His manipulation is based around his delusion, that only he knows what’s good for you and he will threaten other people around you to leave you alone so that soon the only person who you can turn to for companionship is him. He is not above kidnapping you to make sure that you are always safe.     

Nanami Kento: 

Not really reverent or cruel, Aware, Honest, and Strict

Kento falls somewhere in between reverent and cruel. He would most likely seem like a perfectly normal person when he asked you out on a dinner date, but secretly the gears in his mind were turning with how to explain his current predicament to you. Unlike Suguru and Satoru, Kento sees no reason to beat around the bush and try to manipulate you into a relationship with him. Kento definitely has high expectations for how you will behave towards him. Just like Suguru, he also has punishments in place for if you break a rule, although his are a little more extreme. More than once, he has kept all food away from you until you promised to behave, essentially starving you into submission. 

Choso: 

Reverent, Delusional, Manipulative, and a mix of strict and lenient

 In Choso’s eyes, your perfect, he would give anything in the world to make you safe and happy. He is probably the most delusional out of these four men, and would not be able to tell or really care if you reciprocated his feeling or not, he just knows he needs you. He would not be intentionally manipulative, he would most likely kidnap you, forcing you out of your normal way of life, and into his home. He would shut you off from the outside world, most likely leading to you developing a Stockholm Syndrome type mental state after a long enough period of time. Choso doesn’t have any real rules for you, but he still feels the need to keep you under lock and key.    

Noritoshi Kamo: 

Neither reverent nor cruel, Aware but a bit delusional, Honest, Strict

Noritoshi is a bit more of an extreme Kento. He most likely flat out kidnapped you after stalking you for a little bit and deciding you had to be his. He knew that what he was doing completely wrong and he felt a bit guilty, but he reminded himself that you needed to be protected. He would tell you about his intentions after he had taken you, he thought that the best way to get you to love him was to be as transparent as possible. Noritoshi would be strict on a whole nother level, going as far as to plan your meals and daily schedule. It was probably a punishment in it itself, being forced to go by his plan and having no freedom.

Yuuta Okkotsu: 

Reverent, Delusional, Manipulative, Strict

Yuuta is the kind of yandere who makes you his entire life. He literally worships the ground you walk on. He is not capable of seeing you as upset by any of his actions at all. In fact, he is so delusional that even if you were to yell at him and tell him he was ruining your life, he’d just hug you and say that your tantrum is because you are “just a little overtired”. He is pretty manipulative and uses guilt-tripping to get what he wants. You reject him? The next thing you know he’s threatening to kill himself because you don’t love him. He also has a lot of unspoken rules, such as no hanging out with other males if he’s not there. Failure to comply will result in a lot of guilt-tripping. Yuuta's ultimate strategy is to guilt you into never leaving his side.

[nextdoor-neighbors]

It’s Always Been You

Request: @divergirl99

Hey could I get a Fred x reader where maybe the reader is ginny or Rons best friend since they were young and the weasleys are all protective of here especially the twins and maybe they find her upset cause he boyfriend cheated and Fred gets angry and ends up getting in a fight with the ex and then confesses?

Pairing: Fred Weasley x Reader

Word Count: 1.9k

Warnings: Mentions of cheating, violence (punching), blood

You walk down the corridors of school, on the search for your boyfriend, Adrian Pucey. You have a free period - your last period of the day before dinner - and you know he does, too, which usually you spend together, but today, you can’t find him.

“Ron,” you call when you see your best friend, who’s walking with Harry. He looks up at the sound of your voice and smiles, turning to say something to Harry before making his way over to you.

“Hey, Y/N. What’s going on?”

“Have you seen Adrian? I can’t find him anywhere.”

Ron frowns. He’s never been a fan of Adrian, with him being a Slytherin and all, but considering Adrian has always treated you well, Ron has kept his mouth shut over the last few months that you’ve been in your relationship.

“No, I haven’t,” Ron says, “but I’ll let him know you’re looking for him if I do.”

You smile and thank him before continuing your search. You turn down a hall of empty classrooms, not sure why he would be down here, but you decide to look anyway. You peer into the classrooms, stopping abruptly when you stop two figures in one of them, locked in what appears to be a passionate snog session. You blush at catching them, averting your eyes, but quickly do a double-take when you think that you recognize one of the figures.

You know that messy black hair and Quidditch jumper all too well.

You shove open the door to the classroom, and the two jump apart in shock at the noise. You make eye contact with Adrian, your heart dropping to your stomach, and immediately turn to leave, tears already burning at the backs of your eyes.

“No, no, Y/N, I promise, it wasn’t what it looked like, I-” he calls after you, but you keep walking away, past the few other students in the halls with your head down and tears blurring your vision. You don’t know how to feel; you’re devastated, because you didn’t think he would ever do something like this to you, but you’re also shaking from your rage, and as much as you want to scream at him, you don’t think you can do so without sobbing. So, you opt for the silent treatment.

Eventually Adrian gives up calling after you, so, you hide out in the prefects’ bathroom for the rest of the period. You don’t want to show your face at dinner, in case he tries to talk to you, but the grumble of your stomach in the silent bathroom says otherwise.

You push yourself up off the cold tile floor, wiping your tears away as you gaze at yourself in the mirror. Your eyes are red and your skin blotchy from crying your eyes out for the entire period, so you splash some water on your face until you think it’s slightly less noticeable. At least, you hope it is.

You venture out into the halls, already dreading whatever you’re about to face. Your heart aches. You really thought he was a good guy, but of course, you were wrong. Per usual. You always had dated the wrong guys, who all ended up breaking your heart in one way or another. You thought Adrian would be different, and you’re beyond mad at yourself for ever thinking he would be. 

You don’t think you’ll ever find a good guy. I mean, there is someone you’ve always wanted, someone who you think would treat you well, but he’d never want you. Why would he?

You avoid eye contact with anyone as you make your way into the Great Hall, finding your normal spot between Ron and Ginny. You had hoped they wouldn’t ask questions, or that you could play off your heartbreak well enough that they wouldn’t notice, but then again, you’ve been friends with the Weasley family since forever. They’re all very protective of you, especially the twins, who are two years older than you. Of course someone is bound to notice.

Sure enough, before you even fully sit down, George - who’s sitting across from you - says, “What’s wrong, Y/N?”

You look up at him, forcing a very weak smile and shaking your head.

“Nothing,” you say quietly.

“That’s bullshit,” Fred adds, his eyebrows furrowing in his concern, “You can tell us.”

You look at Fred, and just as you’re about to admit what happened, Adrian comes up behind him. You look up at him, and Fred must notice the change in your expression as your stomach twists, because he spins around in his seat.

“Y/N, can I talk to you?” Adrian asks. You fight the urge to start crying again as you make eye contact with him, instead, mustering up all of your courage.

“No,” you say, “Adrian, we’re done.”

You don’t even have to look at Ron, Ginny, the twins, or any of the other people listening to know how shocked they probably appear. You watch as Adrian’s face drops, but he doesn’t budge.

“Please, Y/N,” he practically begs.

“Do you not understand what no means, Pucey?” Fred replies before you can, getting up out of his seat and standing up, towering over Adrian.

Adrian’s face immediately twists into a scowl as he looks up at Fred. You can’t find the words to tell Adrian to go away or Fred that it’s okay, you can handle it, as you watch the boys with wide eyes, fearing what’s about to happen next.

“Stay out of it, Weasley,” Adrian snaps, before turning back to you, pleading again, “Y/N, you don’t understand. It was a mistake, and if you’d just let me explain-”

Fred keeps his eyes trained on Adrian, as if daring him to speak to you one more time. You find your words, as the entirety of the Great Hall is listening in on your conversation:

“I think I understand perfectly, Adrian, because there’s not much to explain about why I found you kissing another girl.”

“You did what?” Fred shouts, and you watch as he pushes Adrian with his hands flat on his chest. Adrian falls back, his face contorting in rage. At this point, the other house tables have erupted into noise, students standing up and trying to get a good look at the fight.

Adrian pushes himself up, rushing towards Fred, as Fred yells something about how he just lost the greatest thing that ever happened to him and how he’s going to pay for hurting you.

Adrian’s fist connects with Fred’s jaw, knocking Fred’s head back, but Fred reacts instantly, socking Adrian straight in the nose. The blood starts flowing from Adrian’s nose immediately, and you yell at them to stop, but neither boy listens to you as more punches are thrown.

Thankfully, a few teachers have made their way over, and with a swish of her wand, McGonagall separates the two boys. You stand there, your heart pounding like crazy in your chest, looking between Fred and Adrian, who stand a few feet apart, giving each other the death glare. Adrian wipes his sleeve across his nose, smearing his blood all over the fabric. You’re sure that he’s going to have a black eye tomorrow, as well. Fred, on the other hand, looks better off, with seemingly only a puffy, split lip.

You’re at a loss for words as you watch Fred and Adrian be escorted out of the Great Hall by Snape, McGonagall, and Dumbledore. Fred looks over as he walks away, and you make eye contact with him for a split second. In that second, he looks you up and down before turning away. Your stomach flips at that, but in a good way.

You don’t know what to say to him later. Do you thank him? You know that Adrian will never bother you again, thanks to this, but you also know that the whole school is going to be talking about this: about Adrian cheating on you, and about Fred’s reaction.

Your heart feels like it’s being squeezed inside your chest as you think about that. Why did Fred react like that? I mean, you know he’s protective of you, but so are George, Ginny, and Ron, and they didn’t jump Adrian like that...

No, you shouldn’t get your hopes up. After all, you need time to recover from today, so you shouldn’t be trying to jump into anything else quite yet, either. But then again, it’s Fred. Your longtime crush, but also your best friend’s older brother. The one guy that you’ve wanted that you always thought was unattainable. He couldn’t possibly see you as anything more, could he?

You excuse yourself from dinner quietly, whispering to Ron that you’ll talk to him later. You’re hoping to find Fred whenever he’s done getting in trouble, but also, hoping to avoid Adrian. He’s the last person you want to see right now.

You hover around the area of Dumbledore’s office, and after several minutes, you hear footsteps. You peer around the corner to see Adrian, walking away from you, thankfully, towards the hospital wing, and Fred, headed towards you.

“Hey,” he says, quietly, offering you a small smile as well as he can, considering his lip is still busted.

“Hi,” you reply, still not sure what to say. You’re really not sure how to process anything that just happened, but you’re going to at least hopefully get Fred’s thoughts on everything.

“Hopefully that asshole learned his lesson,” Fred says bitterly as the two of you walk side by side down the empty corridor, “If he ever bothers you again, you let me know, okay? I’ll take care of him for you.”

“But why?” you ask, stopping in your tracks. Fred stops too, just looking at you, as if nonverbally asking you to elaborate. “Why do you care so much?”

Fred’s eyebrows furrow slightly, but he hesitates before speaking.

“You’re Ron’s best friend. Obviously I’d stand up for you, especially against a prick like Pucey. But...” he trails off, looking over you again. You stay silent, waiting for him to continue.

He looks up to meet your eyes, and this time, angry Fred is gone, and in his place is hesitant, vulnerable Fred. Something that you don’t see often.

“I like you, Y/N. A lot,” he says, and your heart somersaults.

“I know this probably isn’t the best time to tell you,” he continues, “considering everything that just happened, but, I just... it’s always been you, and it pisses me off to see you fall for these guys who treat you like shit instead of like a princess, which is what you deserve.”

For definitely not the first time today, you can’t find the words to reply, but this time, it’s for a good reason. For a moment, you forget about Adrian, about your heartbreak and about the fight, and you cross the small gap between you and Fred, pushing yourself up on your tiptoes to kiss him.

He tastes like the blood from his lip, but when you pull away, you smile, and he smiles back, almost in relief.

“Let’s get that lip of yours fixed up,” you say, “and we can talk more.”

“Absolutely,” Fred replies, reaching for your hand as the two of you start down the hall again. “I’m never going to let any guy hurt you again, Y/N. And I definitely won’t ever hurt you. You can trust me on that.”

And you truly believe him.

[tsukishumai]

Your First Fight - Akaashi, Kenma, Oikawa, Kageyama (Setter Squad)

A/N - This was for anon, I’m so sorry, I’m not sure what the heck happened to this post >-< but it’s back, and I fixed the links on the other posts as well!

Ace Edition

Word Count: 2.8k T-T 

I may or may not have gotten carried away with this one  (✿◠‿◠) Buckle up, and I hope u enjoy!  ( ˘ ³˘)

AKAASHI –

You understand why Akaashi wanted to keep your relationship secret. Really, you did. You could already imagine the barrage of overbearing comments, and the teasing that was sure to be a distraction during practice. With Nationals just around the corner, this was the last thing you both needed.

Being the manager of the Fukurodani Volleyball Club, you know better than most just how rowdy the group could actually be. Bokuto may be the loudest one of the bunch, but all the others can be just as provoking.

And to be honest, the sneaking around was kind of hot. You can’t deny you got butterflies every time Akaashi would pull you into the equipment room for a quick make out session, or when he would give your thigh a secret squeeze under the lunch table surrounded by your friends.

But it’s been months now, and frankly, you were kind of getting tired of it. Sure, it may be slightly more convenient for the both of you, but some days you just want to hold your boyfriend’s hand down the hall without having to look over your shoulder.

You’ve only brought it up to Akaashi once before, but he brushed it off by saying it wasn’t the right time, and you were discouraged to try ever since.

You really weren’t planning to bring it up at the Tokyo Representative Playoffs… you really didn’t. But Konoha’s girlfriend showed up to cheer him on, looking so happy and proud in the stands, you couldn’t fight the tinge of envy that started to take over your body.

Akaashi was observant, and he knew you better than anyone. He could see you stealing glances into the stands, could see the tension in your shoulders whenever Konoha’s girlfriend yelled out cheers for him.

He couldn’t stop himself from following you after you told Yukie you were just going to the restroom.

“No good luck kiss?” he called out once the both of you were a safe distance from the team.

“I’m sure you wouldn’t want anyone to see,” you said bitterly, not stopping for Akaashi.

Akaashi frowned. “Y/N, you know that’s not true.”

“Well, why else wouldn’t you want to tell anyone about us?” you asked, you finally stopped walking, turning around to give him a hard look.

Akaashi groaned in frustration. “Do we really have to talk about this right here? Right now? I told you, it’s just easier this way.”

You scoffed, and Akaashi hated the sound. “Sorry our relationship is such an inconvenience for you.” You didn’t give him a chance to reply, quickly entering the women’s bathroom, faintly hearing the sound of Bokuto calling your boyfriend’s name behind you.

Akaashi didn’t blame you for the loss against Itachiyama, but he definitely blamed himself.

“Have you seen Y/N?” he asked Bokuto after the game, but the ace just shrugged, too upset about the loss to really care. The whole team had all gathered their things, ready to make their way out of the gym and you still were nowhere to be found.

Akaashi’s worries were relieved, but quickly replaced with new ones when Bokuto spotted you down the hall, cornered by someone wearing a Nohebi uniform.

“So tell me, do you have you a boyfriend?” Akaashi heard him ask, and you finally noticed the team approach you. The evil gleam in your eye didn’t escape Akaashi’s attention.

“No, actually. I don’t.”

It was one thing for you to deny it to your teammates, but to other men? Akaashi shouldn’t be mad that those were the words that came out of your mouth; it was his own fault for putting you in the situation in the first place. He knows you’re just doing what he told you to.

But he was furious, and there was nothing that could have stopped him from grabbing you by the elbow, turning you away from the dirty little snake that dared to talk to you, and crashing his lips onto yours.

You weren’t sure what reaction you were expecting from Akaashi, but it definitely wasn’t this. Though, you weren’t complaining, returning his kiss with equal fervor, ignoring the uncomfortable cough from the Nohebi player, and the gasps and shocked exclamations from your teammates.

All you could focus on when he pulled away was Akaashi, blue eyes staring straight into your soul, the next words tumbling out of his mouth was all you’ve wanted to hear for months.

“You’re mine. I’m going to make sure everyone knows it.”

KENMA –

You’ve been sitting in the same spot on Kenma’s bed for about an hour now. The room was filled with only the sounds emanating from the TV, and your boyfriend’s fingers tapping on the buttons of his controller.

Kenma always did like falling into a hole whenever he bought a new game; you’ve known this about him since you were kids. It wasn’t something you ever really minded, nor did you think it was something you wanted to change. It was a part of him that you simply accepted.

Normally, you were content with reading a book while he played, the two of you sitting in comfortable silence, getting lost in different worlds. You both respected each other’s hobbies, and the fact that you could do them together in the same room worked out so perfectly.

However, you finished your book faster than you anticipated, and in your shortsightedness, you failed to bring with you a second book. You tried to read webtoons online, but the light from your phone began to strain your eyes.

“Kenma,” you whined as boredom got the best of you, and the blonde boy didn’t bother to respond, “I’m hungry. Can’t we get something to eat?”

“After,” he grunted, though there were no specifications to when ‘After’ would be.

You sighed, getting up from your spot on the bed to tinker with his things. You walk around his room, running your fingers along the books lined on his shelf, picking up frames that contained happy memories of his life.

You hear your phone ding, signaling a message and you turned to make your way back to the bed.

“Hey!” Kenma exclaimed suddenly, making you jump, “Could you not walk in front of the TV? I just died because of you!”

You stared at him in shock for a second. You had never heard him raise his voice before “Excuse me? So what, it’s just a stupid game.”

“It’s not a stupid game,” Kenma grumbled, his voice back to his usual soft tone, but still held a slight tinge of anger. “You know I’ve been waiting for this to be released. Can’t you just read your book and be quiet like you usually do?”

Kenma immediately knew those were the wrong words to say, regretting the way you face turned into a pout. He watched you begin to gather your things, a slight panic rising in his chest when he realizes you’re trying to leave. “You know what, let me just leave you alone, since clearly my company isn’t wanted –“

You were cut off by Kenma getting up from his spot, opening the bottom drawer of his TV stand to rummage through it. You eyed him curiously until he finally found what he was looking for; pulling out another controller that he connected to the gaming console.

He quietly took your hand, pulling you down to sit on the floor with him. You sat cross legged and confused, wondering what he was doing until he handed you the controller. You stared at it in your lap, a small smile spreading on your face at his silent apology.

He started the game on easy mode, giving you a quick rundown on the basic controls.

“I’ll order us some pizza,” he said quietly, making you give him a soft peck on the cheek.

“Pizza sounds good.”

OIKAWA –

The booming sound of Oikawa’s serves was something that will never cease to amaze you.

Sometimes, it was hard to reconcile your Oikawa Toru – the one that hides behind your hair during scary movies, and asks you to kill the spiders for him – with Aoba Johsai’s Oikawa Toru. To you, they were just two completely different people.

But when you were watching him practice like this, raw power coming from his usually gentle hands, you can’t help but stare at him in awe.

You don’t usually stay this late to watch him practice; on a normal day, your club activities would end at the same time and Oikawa would walk you home, but on days like today where he felt he needed the extra practice, you left him in the care of Iwaizumi.

You were a little surprised, however, when you found Iwaizumi waiting for you at your club room, claiming he really needed to get his part of his group project done by tonight, and if you could please stay and make sure your boyfriend doesn’t kill himself.

How could you say no?

At this point, you’ve lost track of how many times Oikawa practiced his serve, the repetitive sound of the balls bouncing and his grunting becoming a sort of hypnotic rhythm for you. Before you knew it, the sun had BEEN down, and the moon had taken its place in the night sky.

You begin to notice the telltale signs of exhaustion, Oikawa struggling to catch his breath, chest heaving up and down, his form beginning to look sloppy.

“Alright,” you say, jumping down from your spot on the bench, “It’s time to go home.”

“One more.”

“Tsk,” you clicked your tongue, walking around collecting the balls, “It’s been hours, Toru. Rest is also a part of training, you know.”

He ignored you, grabbing another ball from the cart, but you just started taking down the volleyball net.

“What the hell are you doing? I said one more!” “And I said it’s time to go home!”

The ear-splitting sound of the volleyball slamming the floor cut through the gym, leaving you frozen in place. “You wouldn’t understand! You may be satisfied with doing the bare minimum for your practices, but my serves have to be perfect! I have to be perfect!” Oikawa’s voice echoed, glaring at you with red eyes, frustration evident on his face.

You didn’t say anything. You stared at him for a moment, then turned around and began the process of closing the gym. Oikawa also chose to stay silent, brown eyes trained on the floor as he gathered his belongings, silently following you once you turned off the lights and locked the door.

The walk home was quiet; the lack of a reaction on your part weighing more heavily on Oikawa than he expected. He snuck a glance at you, but you kept your head forward, steel faced and neutral.

Each step he took was more agonizing than the last, knowing he shouldn’t have lashed out at you like that. Your house was beginning to come into view, and he couldn’t leave the night like this.

“I’m sorry,” he said softly, and your sharp inhale let him know that you heard him.

“I know.”

“I’m exhausted...” and you know he wasn’t just talking about volleyball.

You finally faced him, and gently grabbed his arm, wrapping it around your shoulders as you snaked an arm around his middle. He felt all the tension his body melt away, half expecting to find it puddled around his feet.

“I know,” you said, “But if you ever talk to me like that again, you’re getting a flying fist to the face.”

Oikawa laughed, drawing one out from your own mouth. He placed a kiss on your temple, and gave you full permission to cut his head off if he ever lashed out at you again. He always appreciated how he never had to tell you anything… you always just knew.

KAGEYAMA –

Kageyama had a pretty good weekend, if you asked him.

He woke up early on Saturday morning to go for a run, then got home and had pork curry for lunch. He figures it’s been a while since he’s brushed up on his basic skills, so he went to the local gym and practiced some drills. On Sunday, he was dragged by Hinata to a study group with Yachi, and admittedly gotten more homework done there than he would have on his own.

It was a nice, productive weekend. He entered his Monday with this positive vibe following him around, even morning practice went by smoothly.

He went about his usual routine of waiting for you by the school gates so he could walk you to class. He only waited about ten minutes until you came into view, and Kageyama subconsciously straightened his posture. He tried to push down the little tickle at the pit of his belly when you made eye contact, not wanting to admit he was excited to see you.

“Good morning,” he said as soon as you approached, but his entire mood completely shifted downward when you simply walked passed him.

Where was his usual ‘Good morning, Tobio-kun!’? Why didn’t you stop to give him his morning peck on the cheek? Why didn’t you let him carry your bag for you on the way to class?

Did he do something wrong?

He was so confused, questions running through his head as he simply trailed after you silently.

“Is everything alright?” He tried to ask once you reached your class, but you just gave him a stern look, turning away from him to enter your classroom and take your seat. He was left there looking like an idiot.

He couldn’t focus in class, trying to wrack his brain on why you could possibly be upset. Did he forget an anniversary? Doubtful, you’ve only just started dating. Were you on your period? Kageyama shook his head. Even he knew that would literally be the worst question to ask.

The bell rang to signal the start of lunch, and Kageyama hurriedly gathered his things so he can go find you.

He didn’t have to look very far, though, because when he exited his classroom, he spotted you down the hall.

The second you saw him, you marched your way over; the dark aura you were giving off had made everyone steer clear of you.

Kageyama gulped, wanting to run away before he remembered that he also wanted to talk to you.

“Y/N –“ “You know, I was going to ignore you the whole day, but seeing you this morning just really pissed me off, and unlike you, I actually can’t stand not talking to you.”

Kageyama blinked, happy to hear your voice, but confused at the words you were saying. “Unlike me? What do you mean?”

You crossed your arms and huffed. “Where the hell were you all weekend?”

Again, Kageyama blinked stupidly. “What do you mean? I was home.”

This seemed like the wrong answer, because now your hands moved to your hips, and for some reason, you were ten times more intimidating like that. “So? You never thought to shoot me a text? Or give me a call?”

“Was I supposed to?” Kageyama asked, and the genuine curiosity in his voice made you face palm.

“Did you not want to?” You asked, though there was no hurt behind the question.

“I did.” “So why didn’t you?”

Kageyama thought about it for a moment. “I went to the gym instead.”

You let out a groan of frustration. Honestly, you should have known. It took you three tries before Kageyama even realized you were confessing to him. It took him even longer to realize that he actually had to tell you he liked you back, and that you had no idea that him buying you yogurt meant he was asking you out.

“Tobio-kun,” you said patiently, “If you’re thinking of me, you should text me or call me to let me know.”

He tilted his head slightly. “Even if I have nothing interesting to say?”

You nodded, looping your arm through his and starting your walk to the cafeteria. “Even then. I just want to hear from you.”

Kageyama nodded his head in understanding. “Okay. That’s good to know.”

Your phone never stopped blowing up after that conversation. RIP your notifications.

[bonesbuckleup]

Lord, this answer got long. I’m a little embarrassed about it, but I wrote it, so it’s getting posted. It’s a literal essay. Sorry but also not?

TLDR: Yes, the show is arguably unfair to Sokka about Kya, but it also follows a pattern where Sokka stays quiet about Bad Feelings and plays by the rules established for his character. Katara, meanwhile, grieves loudly and often, and appears to be under the impression that because Sokka’s grief is silent it doesn’t exist, which also fits her character/interactions completely. Neither of them are right or wrong, but it sets them up on inevitable collisions.

Now. If you want to join me on a cactus-juice fueled descent into madness, proceed below the cut.

Number one. We’re referring to this exchange in “The Southern Raiders,” where the Gaang is talking about Zuko and Katara going after the man who killed Kya, which is vicious and brutal and never reflected on:

Aang: You sound like Jet. Katara: It's not the same! Jet attacked the innocent. This man, he's a monster. Sokka: Katara, she was my mother, too, but I think Aang might be right. Katara (angry, yelling): Then you didn't love her the way I did! Sokka (visibly hurt, softly): Katara.

And that’s it. Upon returning, Katara apologizes to Aang and not, as Anon is absolutely correct in pointing out, to Sokka, who is 100% the more injured party. Now. Is it possible this is one of the rare missteps from the atla writers? Yes. Absolutely. Is that the answer I’m about to write a literal fucking essay about? No. Because it’s more painful fun to take it as face value and talk subtext.

First, a reminder that this show is fucking good at what it does. It teaches you how each character grieves as we go: Aang explodes, often triggering the Avatar state, usually crying or angry, and when he does try to repress his Bad Feelings it rarely lasts longer than a day; Toph either shuts down or gets mad, but either way she doesn’t like people seeing her having Bad Feelings and often storms away, knowing that she can’t control it no matter how much she might want to; Zuko yells at the sky in a rainstorm or yells at his dad in an underground tunnel or challenges Zhao to an Agni Kai or yells at his uncle in a jail cell and generally is an emotive nuclear bomb because the boy has feelings and if he keeps them inside for more than three seconds he might explode okay.

Then we have Katara and Sokka.

Let’s start with Katara, since she has the most textual and straightforward displays of grief. She’s really the only one to talk about Kya’s death in Book 1. If Sokka mentions it, it’s barely in passing. I don’t think we hear Hakoda address her death at all (which I’ll return to in a moment.) Katara’s grief is loud. It’s angry. It’s still very much a living thing for her. She thinks she sees Kya in the swamp and breaks down crying, and tells Aang and Sokka about it with no hesitation. When she’s angry and sad at Hakoda for leaving, she acts out and is visibly upset with him, yells at him, cries at him. She out-loud hates Zuko when she comes to the conclusion that he told her about Ursa and got her to talk about Kya to manipulate her. It isn’t that her grief is performative, because it’s a very real and terrible thing, but it’s a grief that’s to be witnessed.

Then, Sokka. Sokka’s grief is more complicated because it exists almost entirely in subtext, especially in regard to Kya. We really only hear him talk about Kya twice, both in Book 3. First, to Toph, when he tells her that he can’t remember what Kya looks like. Worth noting, however, that even though it is Sokka talking, this is still centered on Katara and Katara’s grief. The next time is when Zuko asks what happened to Kya, and Sokka tells the story that leads into the initial flashback. Sokka doesn’t talk about his mom. This is a fact of the show. It’s such a fact of the show that, in “Southern Raiders,” after the exchange at the start of this post, while Katara and Zuko are on the hunt, Sokka doesn’t bring up Kya again and is messing around with Aang. Like nothing has happened or is currently happening--which I’ll come back to in a moment.

So while we can use Kya as a perfect example of how Katara grieves, we can’t really use her for Sokka. So let’s use Yue instead. Moments we see (or don’t see) Sokka grieving Yue:

In the opening to Book 2, we briefly have a shot of Sokka with the moon imposed behind him.

“The Swamp,” where Sokka’s vision is of Yue accusing him of not protecting her. This one is one of the more textual moments of grief--”I think about Yue all the time”--but what’s awful great about it is how Sokka tells Aang and Katara. Aang, obviously, has no qualms about sharing his vision. Katara openly talks about seeing Kya. Sokka only tells them about Yue when explicitly asked. Even then, he doesn’t mention what she said to him. From this, we can assume that Sokka is still holding onto a lot of guilt over her death--guilt that he won’t let Aang and Katara see. Anyway. Moving on.

“The Serpent’s Pass.” After spending all day panic protecting Suki, he tells her that he lost someone, but doesn’t go much further into detail, just saying that he can’t when she tries to kiss him. Of course, this is all happening in front of the moon. Again, though, Sokka stays vague. He doesn’t tell her any details.

“The Puppetmaster,” Toph posits that maybe the moon spirit has gone mean and is kidnapping people. Sokka snaps at her, in a moment definitely meant for laughs, saying, “The Moon Spirit is a gentle, loving lady. She rules the sky with compassion and ... lunar goodness!” It is a funny moment, but here’s what we can take from it: Toph doesn’t know about Yue. Toph is a Feral Bastard a lot of the time, but she also knows where the line is, and I don’t think she’d’ve said that if she’d known.

“Boiling Rock,” in arguably the most quoted (and well deservedly so!) line in the entire show. “My first girlfriend turned into the moon.” “...that’s rough, buddy.” COMEDIC GOLD. Also, weirdly, the literal only time that Sokka explicitly tells someone about Yue in the course of the show.

“Ember Island Players” which I haven’t hit in my rewatch yet, but I definitely remember a moment where Suki asks Sokka when he was gonna tell her he made out with the moon, and he tearfully shushes her. Again, played for laughs, but the implication is that he still hasn’t told Suki about what happened.

This plays perfectly into the same way that Sokka (doesn’t) talks about his mom. When the Bad Feelings come, Sokka either avoids them and finds a distraction (Goofs with Aang--see, told ya we’d come back to that) or stays silent. When someone explicitly asks him about the Bad Feelings--what he saw in the swamp, what’s eating at him in “Sokka’s Master,” why he’s panic-protecting Suki--he’ll answer, but often talks around the actual issue. (Interestingly, it’s in regard to Suki we see the most explicit manifestation of Sokka grieving as Azula taunts him during the invasion: he cries, he attacks Azula, he yells and questions her despite the fact he knows she’s wasting their time. I think this one hits him because, as this beautiful post points out, Suki’s the protector in the relationship, and Sokka can actually chill out for 2 seconds. But he let his guard down, and Azula got Suki. Anyway. That’s probably a different essay: back to the matter at hand.) We even see this in “Boiling Rock.” There’s a moment where they think Hakoda is not with the other political prisoners. Sokka’s tense, drawn tight, but the only thing he says is, “No.”

Basically, we’ve got Katara, who grieves loudly and rages and is kinda like white-water rapids that churn and churn and churn. And we’ve got Sokka, who, to quote John Mulaney, looks at his grief and says, “I’ll just keep all my emotions right here and then one day I’ll die.” Iceberg grief, to keep the water metaphor going.

And where did these come from? Yup! Water Tribe gender roles! What we know from the show is that, while the South is typically more progressive (women can train as benders and marry who they want, at least) than the North, it’s still very rigid: the men are warriors/hunters/protectors, the women stay home to cook/clean/child-rear.

Now: subtext! And why I think they are this way!

We’ll start with Katara. The last waterbender in the South Pole. She no doubt grew up doted on. If I say she’s most likely a little spoiled, I don’t mean it in a bad way--I mean it in a she’s the last living remnant of this aspect of their culture kind of way. When raiders come, she’s probably the first priority to protect. Kya dies to keep her safe. Her needs are generally put before the community as a whole. (This isn’t to say that Katara doesn’t contribute or care about her community, because she 100% does). But! Especially in Book 1, we see Katara often considering her opinions as facts (trusting Jet, the waterbending scroll) and doesn’t always pause to consider the larger impact that her actions will have (scroll and Jet again, challenging Pakku, dressing up as the Painted Lady despite the fact the factory will hold the village responsible). And many of these actions are good! But we see a lot of Katara being pretty self-centered--what can I do, how does this impact me, how do I feel about this? And this isn’t a bad thing! This aspect of her character makes her complicated and complex! Katara loves her family and protecting people and caring for them! She’s extremely empathetic! But she also struggles to meet people where they’re at when they emote in a different way than she does (see: her clashes with Toph, her initial problems with Zuko joining the group, the above interaction with Sokka). It’s also worth talking about how Katara witnessed her mother’s death, which no doubt makes her grief about it a sharper thing.

Then, again, Sokka. Also loved in his community! But a normal kind of love, I’d assume. He probably was raised on stories of the Fire Nation dragging waterbenders away. No one exemplifies the Water Tribe ride-or-die mentality quite as well as Sokka, or the gender roles of the man as the warrior/protector, so you gotta believe Hakoda raised that kid to look after his sister at all costs, which we see throughout the show (already preparing to go after Aang in the South Pole because he know Katara’s going anyway, “You burned my sister!”) And he isn’t there when his mom dies. He finds out later. He goes from feeling like a victor who helped chased the raiders away to the worst realization of his life. I have to imagine he’s ashamed by the fact that he thought everything was going to be okay, which leads into his worldview of assuming that nothing is okay ever in any circumstance.

Finally, Hakoda. Who never, unless I’ve forgotten something, talks about Kya. All we know is that their family fell apart after her death (per Sokka in “The Runaway,” learning how Katara stepped up to hold everything together) and sometime after he took the warriors and straight up left. He apologizes for leaving but doesn’t address the fact that he left Katara and Sokka with no parents at all, only the war. This is, uh, not exactly echoing a healthy coping mechanism?

My theory: Kya dies. Since the Water Tribe is so embedded in gender roles, Hakoda probably shut down and/or checked out emotionally for a while. This leaves his kids on their own to deal with their shit, and we learn Katara does everything she can to keep her family going. As the most protected individual in the South, Katara’s probably been taught that emotions equal attention, and uses her temper/caring/sadness to help bring her community closer. Meanwhile, Sokka, who hero worships his dad, watches Hakoda go stoic and learns that “real men” shove their shit down. Additionally, Katara’s grief is deafeningly loud, and Sokka’s number 1 role is to keep Katara safe. He’s taught that the Bad Feelings only get in the way and make things worse, and so he learns to be fine no matter what kind of terrible is going down around him.  Basically, Katara learns to use grief as a needle and thread, and Sokka learns to bury it as deep as he can and avoid it at all costs. Opposite reactions to the same trauma. Katara gets mad and demands to be heard and listened to and seen, and Sokka gets sarcastic and prepares himself for the day the Fire Nation ships come back for his sister.

So. Back to those above lines from “Southern Raiders.”

From a writing standpoint, I do wish the final moment was between Katara and Sokka versus Katara and Aang. They could’ve had an almost identical interaction, but it would’ve been more nuanced. I don’t think that Katara needed to apologize, but I think we needed some acknowledgement from both of them: Katara continuing the lesson she’s learned about how her pain doesn’t entitle her to hurt other people (including Sokka, who is there no matter what she says or does), and Sokka that Katara’s process of grieving had to involve this catharsis.

Or. Maybe not. Because again--subtext. Their grief works in such different ways that I have to imagine this isn’t a new fight. It was probably brutal and vicious for a very long time. Maybe that’s part of what made Sokka try and go with the warriors. Maybe that’s part of why Katara gets mad so quickly in the first episode of the show. But eventually, unable to find an answer, they just...stop talking about it. Because the two of them don’t talk about it. Katara only talks about her mom with people who aren’t Sokka, and Sokka does exclusively to Toph and Zuko.

The only time I can think of Katara and Sokka talking about it together is the exchange at the top of this post, and it gets ugly fast, and it isn’t brought up again. It’s a fight that will never be resolved, because they fundamentally can’t react to one another in a way that can be universally understood.

“You didn’t love her the way I did!” Katara yells, loudly, because if Sokka loved her then why isn’t he raging? Why isn’t he getting his sword and coming to help her? Why doesn’t Sokka want to burn this firebender to the ground and make him see and hear and look at what he’s done to the world? To their family? He must not understand. He must not care as much or he’d be screaming with her.

“Katara,” Sokka says, much quieter, and adds nothing else. Not because there isn’t anything else to say, but because Sokka can’t talk about this kind of thing. Not doesn’t want to, but can’t, because it’s his job to protect people, protect Katara, and if he lets all those old hurts come boiling up he can’t do that, because that ends with losing focus and losing control and people getting hurt or going away. Why can’t she understand that?

And then they do what they always do. They don’t bring it up again.

[animeyanderelover]

Hello!,if you don't mind, could i request Prompt no 120. With Ronald? 😳😳 Thank you!

Clingy baby.

Tw: Yandere themes, unhealthy mindset, unhealthy relationship, clinginess, possessiveness, manipulation

Prompt 120: “Jealous! Jealous! Jealous! Mine! Mine! Mine”

You must have looked quite pitiful right now. You guessed so at least from the way people kept glancing at you, eying you with those eyes that told you that they felt sorry for you. It didn’t really help you right now, instead it only led you to feeling more and more embarrassed and abandoned. And from the way you hunched over, trying to hide yourself from their gazes which only led to them staring more at you, you knew the pressure and discomfort was getting to you.

He hadn’t come. It was not the first time, he was a busy man. But it was the first time he had let you waiting for so long without making his abrupt appearance. He would need a very good excuse for this one, letting you sit and wait for him in this damn bar like a complete fool.

A short glance at your pocket watch told you that he had been already for nearly an hour too late which made you wonder what the heck had him that occupied to come that late. Or had he simply forgotten that he was supposed to meet you today? That would really make you feel stupid and like you weren't that important to him which was why you hoped that this wasn't the case. Or else one whole hour you had sat here for nothing.

For a short moment you listened to the people around you, to all the lulling, laughing and the music in this place. People making toasts, talking and joking together, getting drunk and flirting with each other. The atmosphere around you was so happy and carefree. You clearly didn't fit in right now, an outsider with a gloomy heart watching longingly from far away. You didn't think you could be able to mix in, not when everyone was aware that you had been rejected and waited for still nearly a whole hour.

You drowned the sigh that was crawling up your lips with a huge gulp of the drinking glass in front of you, alongside with your tears of frustration and irritation. You hadn't drunken too much, your tolerance for alcohol was pretty good and so the three drinks shouldn't affect you too much. You slammed the pot angrily down, the burning feeling of the liquid in your throats starting to cause you to feel rather pissed than hurt. That damn bastard would have to do some good explanation or otherwise you would guarantee to give him your own handmade hell.

Without a further word you stood up, wiping your wet lips with your sleeve and throwing some money on the counter. Maybe the man behind the bar wanted to say something, but he quickly shut his mouth when seeing your grim expression, only quickly wishing you a pleasant night which made you scoff. You simply grabbed your coat and stomped quickly out of this place, throwing everyone who seemed to want to speak with you a silent and warning glare that it would be better to leave you alone right now.

But the true thing that had you nearly going berserk was that as soon as you had rushed outside, taking notice of the dark clouds in the sky and the rumbling of the thunder, only shortly after you felt the first raindrop hitting you. Followed by another. And another. And one after that. And shortly after it was pouring buckets out of the sky, leaving you in only a short time completely drenched. You hadn't taken an umbrella with you, you had simply forgotten it because you had feared that you would come to late. Now look where you were.

"I should have just stayed at home snuggled up in my bed.", you thought darkly, pulling the collar of your long coat a bit higher to get a bit protection. Right now you really thought about cursing out loud and letting all of your frustration out, but if someone would hear you they would probably think off you as a drunk creep and you didn't want to make yourself appear even more of a fool. You had enough embarrassement for this day. You didn't need more.

"Stupid Ronald.", you cussed silently, starting to run to reach your house faster and to save this rather unlucky day of yours. And if you were lucky, you wouldn't catch a cold and be able to go to work tomorrow perfectly normal as if nothing had ever happened. Yes, that sounded good. Just forgetting about that guy and making yourself a cozy night. And if he would dare to show up, you would strangle him.

"Hey there! You, please wait up!"

Who the heck would be outside whilst it felt like the whole ocean was pouring down from th sky? You naturally assumed that the guy had to mean you since there was not a single soul outside except you. You felt slightly confused when you turned around, being met with a man around your age running behind you, holding an umbrella in his hand. Wait. Wasn't that one of the people in the bar? Why was he following you?

As nice as this act of his might have been, having ran after you to shield you with his umbrella from the rain, you were really in a salty mood right now.

"What do you want? I'm not made of sugar, you know? I can handle this rain without the help of a wanna-be-gentle-man.. If you want to pity on me, just crawl back to the place you've come from.", you replied in a meant-to-be-mean voice, giving him a grim look that obviously surprised and shocked him, staring confused down at you. Such rudeness had he probably not seen coming, especially from someone who had been ditched and was soaked from top to the bottom with the rain.

And maybe you had been expecting him to leave after this, hoping to have signaled him that you wanted to be left alone and just go home, throwing yourself in your bed and forget this shitty evening. You had for that moment lost the belief in kindness and understanding of living beings for others. That was exactly the reason why you got flustered when he instead of being offended and insulting you back, he just gave you a smile and scratched his head a bit.

"I don't think that would be a good idea. I noticed that you have no umbrella with you and when the storm started, I simply got worried. It's also pretty late and whilst I see the chance of someone with bad intentions being now outside, I still thought it would be wiser to accompany you a bit until you're brought home."

You gave him the raised-eyebrow-look, not completely buying his reason. You guessed he might just be a very friendly person, but that was not enough of a reason to let him do as he planned. "I appreciate the help, but I can handle myself just fine. Thank you for caring though. In that area you're better than a certain someone.", you grumbled out, pushing him a bit away and enduring the never-ending rain once again.

"I know how this feels."

This made you stop, glancing behind you at the guy whose smile looked by now a bit forced, recalling a memory he didn't like to think about.

"Excuse you?"

"You've been waiting for someone in the bar, haven't you? The way you've constantly been staring at your pocket watch, the entrance and the way you've looked sadder and sadder. I know that feeling as well, it's quite disappointing, having your high expectations crushed just like this whilst everyone around you doesn't really care. Makes you feel like you want to yell all of your frustration out and to punch the air. I guess I just wanted to...try to help you and be a bit there for you. I know I'm just a stranger, but maybe I can still help."

His short speech managed to dumbfound you a bit, for someone who looked like a small troublemaker he was quite the decent guy. "So he's been left waiting before as well, hmm?"

Your anger was quickly vanishing, sympathy starting to bubble up in your stomach for the man who still looked like he was upset about it.

"How long have you known the girl before...you know?", you asked, careful to not trigger him. "A few months. She was really cute and kind and I really thought that we got along very well. But apparently I was wrong. She left me for another one. I hope that in your case it is just a misunderstanding, but it still weights quite heavily, especially when they were the one who planned it in the first place. It makes you feel like an idiot."

He knew indeed how you felt currently, giving you a sudden temptation to tell him a bit about yourself. He didn't look like someone dangerous. He himself had seemed pretty isolated from the rest of the people in the bar, maybe because he had been rejected in there as well. This bar was definitely not a good place for couples, was it?

"If you don't want me to do this I'll leave. You just looked so sad, I thought that maybe a bit company would feel good. You don't have to talk or anything like this."

"It's fine. Having someone to talk too right now does sound nice. Better than getting caught in thoughts of how to kill my boyfriend for not coming to our date like this."

That guy, Simon was his name, turned out to be quite the fun guy to be with. Both of you got along surprisingly well, even though you intended to keep it in a platonic way. Talking to him helped you calming a bit down and you knew that you still loved Ronald and had to let him explain himself later on. But only after you had forgiven him completely.

Who knew, maybe you would run one day into that guy again. But you definitely felt grateful when he escorted you home, said his goodbye and left you afterwards, mentioning before that that he believed that your boyfriend had to have some sort of accident since no one would just ditch someone like you without a good reason. He was nice and you actually ended up wanting to punch the girl who had rejected him for someone else.

“Well, this day was not as terrible after all. I just want to go to bed and sleep now. I’ll pass on the bath.”, you decided, stretching yourself and letting out a yawn whilst putting your cloak somewhere where the fabric could dry.

The storm was still going on, thunder and lightning interrupting the silence every once in a while and you hoped that your new friend would arrive safely. He had mentioned that he lived not too far away though, so maybe he merely needed a few minutes.

No way that someone would be still out in this unbearable weather, right?

So the sudden knocking on your door, persistent and loud, startled you a lot more than you would want to admit later on, every once in a while being covered by the growling of the sky.

“(y/n)! Please open the door! I have to talk to you!”

That voice…No way! You could have hesitated for much longer whether to let him in or not, but when a sudden hit of the wind whipped raindrops against your windows and you realized that Ronald was still standing outside, you decided to show mercy. You had gone through this storm as well.

That did not mean that you harbored salty feelings inside of you when you turned the doorknob around, planning to lecture him the moment you would see his face.

However, the first word you had planned to spit out got stuck in your throat when you saw the condition he was in. Well, the fact that he was completely wet was no real surprise to you, your hair was still dripping as well and even your clothes under the cloak had not been unharmed. But he looked like he had gotten in some sort of fight looking at his torn clothes and you could see a bruise on his face.

“Ronald! What happened to you?!”

You quickly checked for any blood, but luckily didn’t find anything except the blood on his face, helping you to feel relaxed a bit. He had no serious injuries except a few bruises here and there, but this was more than enough to make all of your anger fade away. Suddenly you had a pretty solid idea to why he had been so late, remembering the stories you had been told about street gangs targeting persons alone and beating them for money and whatever they might have with them.

You attempted to support him with your body, but he just quickly walked inside, slamming the door closed behind him and leaning against the wood. The look on his face was…hard to describe, but you definitely knew that it gave you an eerie vibe.

“You surely seemed to have fun with that guy.”

Apathetic. He sounded incredible apathetic in that moment, looking with exhausted eyes at you, betrayal swimming in them. Originally you would have yelled at him that he had come too late, but how could you after having seen him in such a condition?

“Ronald…He just walked me home because I had nothing to shield me with from this rain.”, you said weakly in your defence, guilt consuming you for ever having doubted him like this.

“I know that. I know that I must have made you think I forgot when I came so late. I got caught up in some troubles whilst finishing my work. I hate doing overwork and just today I wanted to finish quickly. Still though…Couldn’t you have just waited in the bar until the storm was over? I had to rush the whole way from there to your house after being told that you left and one of the guys from the bar followed you.”

You really didn’t know how to reply. Had he seriously thought that you would wait that long for him? Was he that confident in you? It was either really arrogant of him to think that or he really just trusted you sincerely that much. And since you felt currently terrible, the latter on got the better of you which made you indeed feel like the culprit. If you would have waited just a bit longer…

“Are you mad with me?”

“No! How could I? I’m just glad you weren’t seriously hurt.”, you protested fiercely, feeling a familiar stinging in your eyes.

“Good to hear. I was quite worried when I caught a glimpse of you with that other guy since you looked like he had just made your day a better one. I know I shouldn’t feel that way, he only helped you. But still…”

When he suddenly latched onto you, pressing his wet body against your own and causing you to worry that he would hurt himself like this, you quickly noticed that he really was worn out now, leaning his weight against yours for a bit support.

“Jealous! Jealous! Jealous! Mine! Mine! Mine!”

It made you almost laugh when hearing him chanting those words if it wouldn’t have been for this rather messed up scenario and that he didn’t sound like his usual self, much more distraught which made you wonder if this was really only because why he had seen you with your new fellow or because of what had happened to him. But one thing was clear. You wouldn’t doubt him like this again.

[siriuslystarbucks]

Every ‘I Love You’

Written for Starbuck Ship Week run by @prongsfoot-discord Day 1: Time Loops. I’ve never done a time loop fic before lol

Pairing: James Potter/Sirius Black

Tags: AU: No Voldemort, Love Confessions, Time Loop, Angst, Confusion, First Kiss, Communication, Getting Together

Summary: One night, James tells Sirius that he loves him. He does it again the next night. And the next and the next, and Sirius doesn't know how long he's been living this day, but he would like it to stop, thanks, because he still doesn't know what to reply. 

Read below or on AO3

James woke him up that morning. Not by shaking him awake-- which was something he'd done plenty of times because he claimed that having to be the only one up was a horrible fate-- but by whistling. He was in an overly cheerful mood this morning, and he was whistling tunelessly as he walked about the room, getting ready.

Sirius pulled his curtains open but didn't otherwise try to rouse himself. He was perfectly comfortable where he was.

"Sod off with that!" Moony yelled, throwing a pillow at James.

It hit him harmlessly in the side. James paused whistling for long enough to pick it up, then he started whistling again-- louder, this time, to prove a point about how untouchable his happiness was-- and he walked over to Moony's bed, then started whacking his legs with the pillow. "You've got to get up if you want breakfast," he said, practically singing the words.

Sirius grinned, too tired to join in on the teasing but enjoying it all the same.

James looked over at him, as if sensing that he was watching, and his smile widened. He winked, whacked Moony one more time, then dropped it at the side of his bed to continue getting ready.

"Ready for another thrilling day of classes?" James asked him as he got closer.

"As thrilling as they ever are," Sirius responded around a yawn. Not one of his best replies, but James was smiling at him like it was award-winning.

Classes were as boring as advertised, and that night, they were down in the common room, tucked away on a couch together, doing their homework.

"I love you," James said. He looked at Sirius with hearts in his eyes. He was so sincere that it made Sirius's chest hurt.

"I-" Merlin, what was he going to say? "I'm sorry," he said by rote. It's what he said to the people that confessed their feelings to him. Half the time he didn't even recognise them, so it wasn't hard to let them down easy. Even for the people he knew, it wasn't that difficult to tell them that he was sorry, but he didn't feel the same. Looking at James was completely different. James meant something to him; James meant the world to him, and as soon as he said the word 'sorry', James looked crushed.

"Oh. I- no I'm the one that's sorry. I thought... I mean, I thought that you were- well, I was wrong. Doesn't matter." He turned back to his book. His shoulders hunched up towards his shoulders as his face burned red.

Normally, when he was upset, Sirius would try to make him feel better. Since he was the cause this time, he thought it would be for the best that he didn't try to comfort him.

After a minute of awkward silence, James muttered, "I'm calling it an early night."

"Goodnight," Sirius mumbled, just as quietly.

He shuffled away and up the stairs to the dormitory, looking defeated.

Sirius felt like scum. He well and truly did. He didn't know what he could've said to James that would've been better, but he did feel bad about it. By the time he went up to the dormitory-- after giving it plenty of time-- James's curtains were drawn, and he seemed to be asleep.

The next morning, Sirius knew that the air would be fragile. He pulled his own curtains open first thing, but he took plenty of time getting ready. He didn't want for James to think that he'd rushed to get away from seeing him or summat.

When James woke, he seemed... cheerful. He was even whistling tunelessly to himself, just like he'd done yesterday. Sirius only remembered that he'd been whistling yesterday because it had annoyed Moony so much that he'd-

"Sod off with that!" Moony yelled, throwing a pillow at him.

It hit James harmlessly in the side. Just like it had yesterday. James paused whistling for long enough to pick it up, then he started whistling again as he walked over to Moony's bed and started whacking his legs with the pillow. "You've got to get up if you want breakfast," he sang.

This was just like yesterday. Sirius frowned as a feeling of dread crawled over him. It was like yesterday had never happened.

James looked over to Sirius with a grin, but it faded after a few seconds.

Okay, so he'd just been being paranoid. James remembered what happened yesterday. He'd just been trying to pretend like everything was still normal. Sirius sent him a weak smile.

"Are you alright?" James asked, walking over in concern.

"Yeah. I just didn't want to make things awkward for you. After last night."

The concern was replaced with confusion. "What do you mean, last night?"

"When we... y'know, talked. In the common room."

"We weren't in the common room last night. We went for a run in the Forbidden Forest, remember? Went straight up to bed when we got back." James wasn't messing with him. His expression was one hundred percent serious. He wasn't joking around or playing a weird prank. "Are you feeling alright?"

"Fine," Sirius said automatically. What he 'remembered' from yesterday must've been a dream. A horrendously vivid dream, but a dream all the same. "A little tired, I guess."

...But if it had been a dream, then why had Prongs and Moony's interaction been the exact same this morning?

*

"I love you," James said.

"Why?" Sirius asked. He was curious. He honestly couldn't wrap his head around it. The first time James said it, he'd been blindsided. It still didn't sit right with him. There was a twist in his stomach when James said it. Three little words, and he was taken entirely out of himself. James said 'I love you' and Sirius had no confidence, not for himself, not for James, and absolutely none for their relationship. He was second guessing all of it, and without James being able to remember it when a new day dawned, he couldn't move past it. He'd gotten used to James listening and giving him advice.

James smiled faintly at him when he asked. "It's not any one thing."

"No, but... why me? Surely there's someone else out there that you'd rather be with."

"I can't imagine being in love with someone else," James said, which made the knot in Sirius's stomach squeeze tighter. "Isn't it what everyone wants? To be with their best mate?"

"I don't think so," Sirius said honestly. It sounded... very James, but not like anyone else. He couldn't imagine Moony or Wormtail wanting to date their best friend.

*

“I love you,” James said, looking over at Sirius earnestly. It was the first time he’d ever said it. At least, as far James was concerned, that was true.

Sirius had been living this day over and over. Each Tuesday night, no matter what he did in the day, James would confess to him. He’d done this at least ten times already, and he still didn’t know what to say in response.

James’s expression fell a little at his extended silence. “Aren’t you going to say anything?”

“What would you like for me to say?” He wasn't careful with his tone. It didn't have any of the fondness that he felt for James. He said it flatly, like he didn't care about James in the slightest.

Sometimes, James got sad. Right now, he got angry. His expression hardened. "Fine. Be like that. You could've told me flat out that you didn't feel the same." He slammed his textbook shut and grabbed his bag. It looked like he was juggling all his items as he stormed out of the library.

Sirius sighed, putting his elbow on the table and leaning into his hand. He'd chosen the library this time with the specific hope that James wouldn't want to say anything when they were so far away from Gryffindor Tower and didn't have an easy way out.

He went to bed that night, keeping his head down and feeling guilty.

He knew that in the morning, James would be whistling like nothing happened, and he'd have to sit through the same exact lectures again. They'd been boring the first time he heard them. One repetition had been annoying, but he was convinced he was going to claw his eyes out before he managed to get out of this.

*

"It's a time loop," Sirius said. He didn't like going to Professor Dumbledore, but he was desperate. He'd skivved classes and spent all day in the library. He'd spent several days in the library. Over a week, possibly; it's not like he was keeping count, but it occurred to him too late that maybe he should've been trying to keep track. He'd been through every book about time travel, time loops, and time related curses. There was nothing useful. He had a better chance of getting answers by talking to Dumbledore than he did sneaking out and trying to find more books elsewhere.

"Curious," Dumbledore said. His brow had furrowed slightly, and he was looking at Sirius intently instead of with his usual casualness. "I know that you dabble in a certain amount of- ahem, experimental and high level magicks. Is there anything you've done that might have triggered this? The smallest footnote in an old ritual can have side effects."

Sirius shook his head without needing to think about it. After reliving the day for the third time, he had considered that option. Unfortunately, things had been quiet on the Marauders side of things. They hadn't done anything in the week-- or even month-- leading up to this stupid Tuesday that they hadn't done a dozen times before. "I'm sure that it's nothing I've done. I haven't done anything new leading up to this for weeks."

"It's... possible that someone else is reliving this day, and you were caught up in it."

He shook his head again. "Everyone else is the same. They only change if I do." He'd checked once, just to be sure. Of course, he couldn't remember everything he'd done the first day, but he'd tried his best, and it had been enough for him to be convinced that he was the only one that knew they were doing this more than once.

"I imagine you'll have to analyze your day then, Mister Black."

Sirius grimaced. He knew that it was his last name, but he hated being called that.

"Whatever the answer is, I think it'll come from your own actions. Not a spell or ritual."

"But this is a magical problem."

"Humans possess a kind of magic all unto themselves. Something that has nothing to do with wands or potions. We have the power to change, at will and deliberately."

Sirius blinked. He hadn't wanted to have a counseling session, he'd wanted a fix to this.

"I believe that when you find the change you need, the loop will be broken."

"Seriously? That's it?" Sirius asked, not bothering to be nice. It's nice like the Headmaster would remember this in the morning, after all. "That's your great advice? Change myself?"

"A simple answer, but not an easy one," he said, apparently unbothered.

*

"I love you," James said.

"So what? You're a sodding teenager. You'll fall out of love in a month."

James looked at him like he didn't recognise him. "Are you joking right now? Because if you are, it's not funny."

"And if I'm not?" Sirius asked, looking at him challengingly.

James didn't answer for a moment. He just looked at Sirius as sadness creeped into his features. "I don't know what I did to make you care so little about me."

"I-" Sirius startled, taken aback. "Of course I care."

"You're not acting like it. I don't want for you to lie. I'm not asking for you to claim that you return my feelings when you don't, but I expect for you to act like my friend, to act like the person I fell in love with." James paused, considering as a thought occurred to him. "Are you feeling alright? You've been acting off all day. I thought you already suspected how I felt, so I thought it would be best to come out with it, but I was wrong, wasn't I?"

It was kind. As kind as James always was to him, even when he didn't deserve it. If Sirius thought that he would wake up tomorrow to a new day instead of the same day, yet again, then he would latch onto this. He would tell James that he was sorry, but yes, that's what it was; he wasn't feeling well and he'd been on edge all day.

But this wasn't anything new, and they would do some horrid exchange tomorrow like nothing had changed-- because as far as James was concerned, there was absolutely nothing that had.

"I don't know what you want me to say, James," Sirius said, exhausted. If James would just tell him what he wanted to hear, then he could do that next time and hopefully it would break the loop. It was, after all, the only big event in this day. "Tell me what you want me to say, and I'll say it."

"I don't know either," James replied, but Sirius could tell it was a lie. He was heartbroken though, and it was Sirius's fault, so he didn't push.

He could work on it the next morning.

*

"Let's play hooky today," Sirius said, one hand on James's arm and trying to smile like he didn't have a care in the world.

James grinned back freely. "Sure."

It was nice to finally have a break from classes, but Sirius finally let himself relax around James again. Ever since that first 'I love you', Sirius had been tied up in knots worrying about it. He didn't want to hurt James's feelings, but by trying to push him away, all he'd done was make himself miserable.

They had fun that day. Sirius pressed a kiss to James's mouth before they tried to sneak back in.

"Sirius," James whispered, when they were still standing so close together they could feel the other's warmth. "If we're doing this-"

"I don't know if we are," Sirius said. He kept his tone gentle, but there was no denying the panic that shot through him. "You're my best mate, but I don't..." He didn't know if he wanted to date James. If he was willing to take the chance.

James swallowed thickly. "Right. You can think about it. I've got time."

James might not know it, but right now, they had nothing but time.

They got caught sneaking back in and got detention for a week for going off the grounds and skipping their classes. It didn't matter. The only one who would remember in the morning, was Sirius.

*

Sirius had done this enough times that he knew the look James got before confessing. Before James had a chance to say it this time, Sirius asked, "Do you ever get scared that you'll ruin something?"

"What do you mean?"

"Like us. Our friendship."

A beat. "I do. Sometimes. I think any risk would be worth it, in the end."

"Even if you don't get the answer you want?"

James frowned. "What're you getting at?"

Sirius didn't look up at him. He looked at his own hands, twirling a quill between his fingers absently. "I know how you feel about me."

Silence.

He still didn't look up at him. He wasn't sure he wanted to see his reaction. "And it terrifies me. The way you look at me sometimes... it's like I could bugger up everything under the sun and you'd still love me."

"That would be true even if we were mates and that's where my feelings stopped," James said quietly.

"And that doesn't scare you?"

"You feel the same for me."

That was- sod it, that was the truth. Sirius was beyond confused for how he felt for James ever since this time loop had started, but he cared about him. He loved him. He would do anything and everything for James if only he knew how. "I do," he admitted. "And it's terrifying."

"What about it scares you?"

"I don't know. I've never felt like this for anyone else. I feel like it could destroy both of us, and there would be nothing left."

"Rather bold of you to assume that we'd let that happen," James said. "What makes you think either of us would be willing to lose our friendship?"

"Fair enough," Sirius said, finally looking up so he could give James a smile.

James looked subdued, but he smiled back. 'How much you love me scares me' wasn't the response he'd been hoping for. Sirius knew that, even if he didn't know what James had actually wanted. Probably 'I love you too', but despite the countless times he'd confessed, Sirius had never been able to get him to admit that that's what he wanted to hear.

It's part of what confused him, and a big part of why it terrified him. To anyone else, what Sirius said just now would've been crushing. James looked a little sad and disappointed, but not heartbroken. 

He wished that he could keep this time. No recrimination, no hard feelings. James knew that Sirius knew how he felt, and he also knew that Sirius was beyond confused about his own feelings.

He sighed and went back to copying down the passage from the textbook. It wouldn't last till morning, but it gave him something to do while he kept James company.

Sirius woke up the next day, wondering how the hell he was supposed to get through this. He didn't know how to look James in the eye like everything was fine when he was so utterly lost.

He pushed his curtains open and rolled to his feet. He was so out of it that he didn't notice things were different until he ran into James in the loo. He frowned.

This wasn't right.

James was supposed to be happily whistling to himself and annoying Remus, not standing morosely in front of the mirror as he tiredly brushed his teeth. "Morning," James mumbled.

Sirius blinked.

"You okay?"

"Are you? I thought you'd be in a better mood."

James's brow creased. "Did we have a different conversation last night than the one I remember?"

Last night. Oh Merlin, he remembered. "What day is it?"

"Wednesday? You know, the day that comes after Tuesday?"

The relief Sirius felt was instantaneous. He didn't think about it, just wrapped his arms around James and rested his head against his shoulder. "Thank Merlin."

"Are you still asleep or summat?"

"More like I just woke up from a nightmare," Sirius muttered. A beat. "I don't know how you even know what love is. How do you know liking me a friend was different than fancying me?"

"I don't know," James said, which wasn't the most encouraging thing Sirius had ever heard. "I thought about it, and it seemed like it fit. Don't look at me like I have all the answers, Padfoot. I'm guessing most of the time, too."

"You always seemed so sure," Sirius said without really thinking about it. James had told him that he loved him a hundred different times, and not once had Sirius thought that he wasn't one hundred percent certain about it.

"What?"

Sirius shook his head.

That night, he asked James if he could kiss him instead of going for it without warning, and James said yes.

"So," James said, clearing his throat, "do I get an Acceptable?"

"Don't be stupid. You get an Outstanding."

"Even though you're not sure how you feel?" James asked.

"I know how I feel, I just... don't know if I'd call it in love or not. It might be more like halfway between in love and just loving you. How should I know?"

James only chuckled. "Well, whatever it is, it's good enough for me. If you're wanting to give this a try, that is."

"I am." He'd spent so many days trying to avoid James's confession, and all he'd needed to do was think about how he felt, not worry about what James wanted to hear him say. 

[utilitycaster]

What’s your thoughts on tm9 suggesting working with Trent? Do you think tm9 are being “bad friends”? I have seen a lot of discussion on it and I was wondering what your thoughts are. Apologies if you have already shared your thoughts.

Hi anon,

I have shared at least some of my thoughts but, as always, give me an inch and I will take one thousand miles and then take one thousand more. If you wanted a normal answer, please click on that link and then feel free to stop reading. If you want me to yell about behaviors in fandom that fill me with rage (and also some additional thoughts about the Mighty Nein in this episode, to be fair, which I’ve marked so you can skip to it), read on.

GOOD FUCKING LORD I AM PRETTY SURE A CERTAIN SMALL BUT LOUD PORTION WITHIN FANDOM, AND THIS IS ABOUT FANDOM IN GENERAL AND NOT SPECIFIC TO THE CRITICAL ROLE, ACTUAL PLAY, NOR D&D FANDOM, HAS NEVER HAD A FUNCTIONAL FRIENDSHIP OR RELATIONSHIP IN THEIR LIVES WHAT WITH THE WAY THEY TALK ABOUT CHARACTER INTERACTIONS. LIKE WHAT THE FUCK.

I don’t think that any of the Mighty Nein were being at all inappropriate during this conversation in the first place, and more on that below, but also like, people say insensitive things to their friends all the time! It’s impossible to account for every situation that could potentially upset someone, and sometimes people need to have difficult conversations! I’ve said this before with people in private conversations but there is an exhausting amount of discourse for CR (but also, like, in general about fictional media by people who are Way Too Online) regarding who really understands and cares about whom and it’s like. They are all friends. They have all referred to each other as found family. They all care about each other. And with that in mind, it’s also true that if you or anyone else were to give me literally any pairing of two characters in the Nein, romantic or platonic, I can without considerable effort name an interaction in which one of them said or did something hurtful or insensitive to the other, because this is a thing that happens when different people with different perspectives and experiences talk to each other for any length of time.

A not-insignificant amount of discourse, in my opinion, has nothing to do with how real interpersonal relationships work and is entirely "this is my favorite/least favorite character (or ship) and I think everyone should also think they are flawless/terrible” and if I had to guess this is probably more of the same. But even if it’s not just that, the idea that the only “good” friendship is one devoid of arguments, slip-ups, and even the most minor of transgressions and anything else is “bad” or “toxic” is so divorced from reality I absolutely cannot engage with it without wanting to scream. Which is not to say that a single action by a friend, even a close one, could never be enough to invalidate the friendship. But it has to be a pretty significant and deliberate violation, and in my opinion the events of this episode do not even budge the needle.

With that out of the way before I return to it at the end: I think the overarching attitude of the Mighty Nein on the whole is “this is going to be an incredibly difficult fight, and we need to discuss all of our options, even distasteful ones that none of us particularly like.”

The linked post talks a lot about why I think Fjord brought it up in the first place, but from there, I would say that Yasha was the only one who was consistently on the side of “No,” which is in line with her character. We know Caduceus is fairly sure they’re going to die without additional help and has seen by far the most terrifying visions of what happens if they fail; that Jester likely has some similar ideas to Caleb regarding “if Trent’s with us, at least he’s not going after Marion”; and while Beau brought up the downsides of working with one’s abuser it’s highly worth noting she was still entertaining it: she floats that maybe this could kill two birds with one stone [2:01:10-ish on the Twitch video].

Veth strikes me as the one who came closest to “pushing” Caleb, and this has been a theme recently. I’m not fully sure about this - Veth is often a character I struggle to get a handle on - but I think it’s a combination of her family being at risk in the same way Jester’s is, her own feelings of guilt or shirked responsibility about leaving the Nein after this before Caleb has achieved his goals particularly given how instrumental he was to achieving hers, and a little bit of still seeing Caleb how he was earlier on, when they first met. That last reason is definitely frustrating when it happens in real life, but it’s a very real phenomenon, the first one is wholly understandable, and the middle one is both. Basically, are those actions a little selfish? Yeah, but people are selfish sometimes. There’s a reason why even when I don’t understand her Veth (and, tbh, all the Mighty Nein) feels like a wholly realized person, and it’s because of things like this, where she has real reactions and emotional turmoil in response to an incredibly stressful situation instead of being blandly understanding.

On top of that, anything that denies that Caleb was not entertaining it, particularly after he quite literally says he’s considered it, feels like ignoring his response because it doesn’t fit a particular narrative. It ignores the entire conversation with Essek, in which Caleb is the one who brings it up first, Caleb is the one who continues to argue for it after Essek expresses his discomfort, and Caleb is the one who says he’s frustrated that his attempt to persuade Essek fails.

Returning to the generalized rant but at what point do you (the abstract you, not you the anon) stop overlaying how you think someone should react and actually listen to people? One of the things in this world that genuinely angers me the most that isn’t, you know, atrocities, is when people assume how someone feels instead of asking them and persist in doing so even when told otherwise, and this is probably why the whole “the Mighty Nein are bad friends” statement has prompted such a strong response from me here. I don’t think I’m saying anything revolutionary here but all the arguments in favor of that statement are stupid! If you don’t ask for a hug, sometimes you won’t get one! If you don’t say you’re uncomfortable you can’t assume people will be aware of it! The realest distinction between good and bad friends, actually, is whether they listen to what you’re saying or if they just project what they think you should be saying, and whether they tell you what they want from you or if they make up elaborate unspoken rules that you’re supposed to magically intuit and follow. Not whether they never make mistakes, or disagree, or bring up difficult topics.

Uh, anyway, this is probably a whole lot more and maybe not even related to what you were looking for but really, the idea that a deep friendship can be reclassified into a binary from good to bad based on two conversations, and the related idea that every interaction that isn’t perfectly harmonious must have someone to blame instead of acknowledging the full depth and breadth of normal healthy interpersonal interactions, are both absolutely terrible ideas and I would love if people in general would immediately stop having them.

[kiegosbby]

Tamaki or Mirio angst please? 🥺 Like he simply snaps at us and when he tries to apologize is too late

so I decided to do both, and then a poly fic! I felt bad bc of taking so long so here you go! Enjoy!!

@devildom-express

@yoongisausuna (gave me ideas for the story)

✁- - - - - - r- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

Tamaki fic:

you and tamaki were on a mission together, and you were sticking together like you normally do. you took the lead, you always did, so he wouldn’t get hurt.

you were sent to infiltrate a small base that the lov had, it should be easy in and out, there should be 3 people inside, take them out and it’ll be over.

you both approached the building slowly and scoped out the inside through a window, seeing a back door that was not guarded and you both snuck over to it

“ok tamaki wait until I give you the signal and I’ll distract them”

you turned your head to get his approval, but instead you saw him busting the door down, trying to take all the villains himself.

luckily you were there to back him up, and you took them down with ease.

when the villains were taken by the police you went to find tamaki and give him a piece of your mind.

“Tamaki! What were you doing you could have been killed?” you were scared for him, you were also pissed because he was doing this so recklessly, did he not care for you at all?

“I was doing my job y/n j-just like you. I don’t need you to take the lead all the time.”

was he really upset over this? you were only trying to help him why is he making a big fuss. you didn’t want him to get hurt, to be home one day and for him to never come back to you, you were only trying to protect him

“but we’re in this together, me and you are supposed to look out for each other and-“

“well maybe we shouldn’t be together if your going to hold me back like such a burden!” tamaki was loud, but he held his head low

your heart shattered at those words, all you were doing was trying to protect him, why couldn’t he see that?

you stood there baffled staring at him with wide eyes, tears bubbling and silently falling as your heart broke.

he finally looked up at you and immediately regretted what he said, he just wanted you to know that he could take care of himself.

he had messed up.

you turned away from him and started walking, and he called after you, grabbing your arm only to gave you harshly pull away.

you started running, you had to be anywhere else but where he was. you needed to get away from him he was closely following you, trying to get you to just stop and talk to him

you lost him eventually, it was a busy day and you ran all the way to the middle of the city. you let your mind wander while you kept walking. we’re you trying to hard in your relationship?

you finally stopped walking and ended up in front of your shared apartment. Why had your legs taken you here? you didnt even know if you and him were together anymore, so how were you going to walk in like nothing happened?

you walked up to the door, should you knock, should you just walk in? you walked in and saw tamaki sitting at the table, he was obviously crying, he was shaking and his eyes were red from crying. your heart broke even more from the sight.

When you walked in the apartment he looked directly at you, and stood up he opened his mouth to talk but all that came out was a sob.

you put your head down to avoid the sight and walked to your shared bedroom, you had to leave, you couldn’t stay after what he said.

as you walked he started following you trying to see what you were doing. what he said was a mistake, you knew that right? He didn’t mean it, he loved you and how you tried to protect him. It showed that you cared

you grabbed a bag from under your shared bed, and walked over to your closet shoving all the clothes that you saw into your bag.

if he thought you were such a burden then you’d leave. hell be free from you and able to do what he wants.

he stood in the doorway and his heart started to race when you grabbed your bag, his stomach dropping.

“Y-y/n what are you doing?”

“I’m leaving.”

your voice sounded so cold, how could you say that? how could you leave? he really didn’t mean what he said.

“n-no you c-cant leave! please I-I didn’t mean it! you can’t leave me alone..” his voice trailed off as he started to cry again, he knew he messed up bad now. you gave him all his confidence, and you loved him at the same time. without you he would be nothing.

you ignored him as you finished packing your bag, and you pushed past him, pushing your feelings down you walked over to the door, stopping for just a second.

he had followed you the whole way there, and stood behind you as you stopped

You turned your head over your shoulder slightly, tears running down your face

“your free tamaki”

and with that you left,.

left him to be alone. to shatter into the ground and become the person he used to be.

Mirio:

you and mirio had been together for a little now, you were 3rd years and you both had hero work to do, so you didn’t get that many times to be alone, but you could tell that something was bothering him.

mirio was usually happy and bright, always smiling. lately you had noticed him spacing off and getting distracted. so you both had a free night tonight, you were going to go to his dorm and spend it with him.

after school you headed to your dorm and got ready, packing a overnight bag and started to make your way to his dorm.

when you got there you knocked softly said a “mirio it’s me” and he let you in, you sat on the bed and waited for him to come in.

he walked in and you noticed his aura was immediately off, and his smile wasn’t like it always was.

“mirio are you ok? You know you can talk to me right?”

“I’m ok y/n no need to worry”

that set you off. there was something obviously wrong, and he was just ignoring that fact?

“mirio something’s obviously wrong please tell me”

you sat in silence for a moment, before he started talking

“I’m always there for everyone. anything anyone needs anything from me I’m there. I’m there talking to them about there problems. and I’m good at it! you know? but what about me?” mirios voice started getting louder, you scooted away from him a little, ready for the worst.

“what about me huh? am I not important? no one ever fucking considered me. Not even you. and now your asking me, after I’ve been messed up all week if I’m ok?” he scoffed and turned his head away from you “Get out”

you turned your head towards him and widened your eyes in disbelief, how could he do that to you? you were worried the whole time. Could he not see that?

“no.”

“no? Y/n I said get the hell out of my room before I make you” he was fully yelling now, standing on the side of his bed looking at you

you felt small under his stance, tears starting to fall from your eyes and you got up, grabbing your bag and walking towards the door

“I was trying to help you.” your voice was filled with venom and you walked out the door and slammed it behind you, you heard the door open and close but you could care less, you were walking anywhere away from this.

you could feel his presence behind you, feel him watching you.

you turned around and came face to face with him, and you looked up at him with anger written on your face

“what do you want togata.”

he looked taken back by the name but he hung his head low, not giving a answer.

you let out a scoff and kept walking, walking into a empty alley, losing him for a few minutes.

you walked down the alley, now hearing footsteps behind you, you walked forward before a van pulling up stopped you, and before you knew it you were being pulled into a van, screaming for help trying to fight them away.

mirio was still following you when he saw the van pull up, his heart started to race and he ran towards you, but he couldn’t stop you from being pulled into the van and driving away.

it happened in a second, before he could even blink.

someone had taken you, and it was his fault.

poly fic:

you were supposed to be going on a date with your boyfriends tonight, but you were going to be a little late after them. you were working late and told them you’d meet them there.

you got ready quickly and walked to meet them at the restaurant they planned for you to.

some people might think it’s a little weird to be dating more then one person, but for you it worked. one was outgoing and one was the complete opposite, it worked perfectly.

sometimes you did have doubts, I mean where did you take place,? they complimented each other well but how did you take part in that?

you pushed those thoughts down and walked up to the place, looking around for them

when you spotted them you saw them both laughing and smiling, and it hurt. it looked like they’d be fine without you. you put your facade back up and walked over to them, sitting down.

it had went well, but you also noticed that when you arrived, they both didn’t laugh like they had when you saw them. you tried, but nothing seemed to work.

you had a feeling in your gut, and through the night it spread to your whole body, hurting and wrenching in pain, it took a toll on your heart.

When you all had finished, they were a little drunk so you called a cab and you all went home.

When you got home you helped them in bed and sat on the couch, thinking over what happened through the night.

had you been that much of a burden to them? you never noticed it before now. they would be much better without you, they looked so much happier just the two of them.

you started pacing around, going through options in your head

if you stayed it would take a toll on there relationship, you did nothing but hold them back.

but if you left, it would only hurt you.

so you decided, you would leave.

you went into your shared bedroom and quietly grabbed a bag packing your clothes, now that you thought of it you had to keep your clothes in a container under the bed while they had there’s stored in the dresser and closet.

should have seen it coming right?

you finished packing and we’re about to walk out when you heard moving on the bed and you stilled, your hand about to grab the doorknob stopped

“y/n? Where are you going?”

shit, it was mirio.

“nowhere mirio, go back to sleep.”

“why do you have a bag?”

you closed your eyes and eternally cursed at yourself. your body tensed when you heard more noises, great you had woken up tamaki.

“w-what’s going on?”

his voice broke your heart, and all the emotions started coming back up, your heart ached more then it ever had.

you turned your head and met both there eyes, and there’s widened at the sight of your face, it was streaked with tears, your eyes were red and your cheeks and dark shade of pink.

mirio quickly got up and walked over to you, while tamaki started crying along with you, knowing what was happening

“y/n you can’t leave us” mirios voice was sad, he was frowning, and you heard tamakis sobs in the background, breaking your heart even further.

“it wasn’t supposed to be like this, you were supposed to be sleeping.” you hung your head low, not meeting his eye contact.

he reached out for you and you quickly pulled away, he wasn’t going to pull you back in.

“I’m leaving. you are both better off without me. please don’t try to stop me I-I want you both to be happy” crying overtook your body now, you pulled your arms around yourself, trying to find some comfort.

“y/n what are you talk-“ Mirio was quickly interrupted by tamakis cry’s, and he went over to soothe him.

that easy for him to back down huh? seems like you were right.

tamaki cried loudly, shouting at you to stay, saying he needed you just as much as mirio.

you turned opening the door walking away from the crying, you couldn’t take it, you needed to leave now before they could suck you back in

you were about to leave when someone grabbed your arm, turning to see tamakis tear struck face, he stood in the hallway, his quirk holding you in place

mirio came up behind him, eyes wide, tears falling silently

you turned your head away, you couldn’t bare the sight of them like that.

“p-please y/n d-don’t leave!” tamaki said and cried loudly, trying to pull you back with his quirk, but you pulled away harshly, slamming the door behind you

as you walked away, back at the apartment tamaki collapsed on the floor.

where did they go wrong? when had they lost you? you were the love of there life. and to think they were going to propose to you, maybe it’s because of dinner, they were nervous. I mean who wouldn’t be nervous when you were going to ask someone to spend the rest of there life with them?

now, they were alone. without you.

[undertheknightwing]

Posted by popular demand: all my dad!Dick Grayson headcanons! 

I’m doing the canonverse ones first. My au ones will be in a separate post so this one doesn’t get too long! Enjoy random stuff I’ve thought of!

Important note: when I say ‘canonverse’ I mean I could see it happening in the show’s universe more than an au, I don’t mean everything is going to fit perfectly with the canon storyline we got since there’s not much I can headcanon with the real storyline anyway. Nothing is going on but useless drama and shitty treatment of the main characters. So keep that in mind,,

Dick had a hard time admitting to himself that he cared for Gar and Rach as if they were his kids because of the whole ‘i don’t do family, i work alone’ thing. Tbh the thought of loving someone again, let alone two people, with his luck of family death and misfortune was scary to him and that’s why after Asylum, he left the two in Angela’s care. He knew he was getting too attached to them (that became clear to him when he went dad rage mode on the guards). Then the Trigon thing started and when he realized he led Rachel and Gar into a trap without knowing, he said ‘fuck it they are my kids and they’re in some serious trouble, I’m going to get them out of that trouble even if it kills me’ and that’s why he ran head on into that force field with his only thought being: ‘my kids are in trouble and I will protect them. Nothing can stop me, not even a demonic force field.’

He treats the kids as equally as he can in normal life situations. Like if Rach got to choose dinner the night before, now It’s Gar’s turn to choose. But when it comes to how to comfort them, that’s when he has to change it up because both kids feel comforted in different ways. Both get nightmares and he had to learn how to handle the situation differently for the two. If Rach has a nightmare, he’ll know cause she wakes him up and they’ll talk about it together until she’s calm enough to go back to bed. Now, if Gar has a nightmare, he’ll hear it cause Gar’s usually screaming, which turns into panicking after Dick wakes him up and then him holding onto Dick while crying. Not much talking on Gar’s end, it’s Dick who’ll say a few words. Rachel needs words to feel comforted because her mother hugged and kissed her growing up but they never really talked, so she felt like she never knew her mother while Gar needs physical affection because he grew up without it and got his thoughts and emotions manipulated by words. And throughout the next day, he’ll check on the Gar or Rachel to make sure they’re doing alright.

When Dick went to Doom Manor to get Rachel, that man did not think he’d be leaving Doom Manor with another kid but surprise! he does. Why though? the show never explains why Dick just decided to take a random kid with them. Well in my headcanon it’s because Rachel refused to leave Gar with the Doom Patrol and to help Dick realize that Gar was being treated horribly here, she used her abilities to show him what Gar’s been going through. Dick saw the things Rachel saw like Chief shooting him just because he stood up for himself and the things she didn’t see, like all the times Chief treated Gar like he was worthless trash and the Patrol’s neglect by keeping him down in a basement with nothing to keep him entertained or company. Dick wasn’t going to let a child be treated like that. Since Chief was knocked out, he just talked to the other three and by talk, I mean rip into like an angry momma bear and tell them he’s taking Gar with him. Cliff wasn’t a fan of how Dick came in and acted like he’s entitled to whatever he wants. That ended with Dick and Cliff screaming over each other until Rita allowed Dick to take Gar with them, though Dick wasn’t looking for permission from them, just an agreement from Gar himself. He got that rather quickly. 

He’s never raised his voice at either of the kids in anger. Not even when Gar almost got himself killed by following Jason, he made sure Gar knew he was disappointed and upset with him by calmly explaining; not yelling. No shock to anyone there that Dick has some issues with his anger and he’s afraid one day he’ll take it out the wrong way on the kids and say something he doesn’t mean just because he’s angry/stressed, ultimately harming his relationship with them. I think the only time he’d actually yell at one of them is in serious situations, like if one of them froze up during a mission, making them an easier target, he’d yell their name or something to try to get their attention and snap out of it.

Kind of on the same note, how he manages worry is very different. He will be over the top about it. He’s very dramatic. Rachel got sick and better believe he learned how to make homemade chicken noodle soup because Alfred would do the same with him. Besides that, he’ll hover around her just in case she needs him, which Rach might take advantage of just a little because what kid doesn’t? She’ll have Dick carry her to bed and tuck her in. Gar slipped during a race with Jason up the net wall in the training room and broke his arm since ya know, he fell onto that hard ass mat and since him nor Rachel can go to the hospital because they’re metahumans, Dick had to fix Gar’s arm, which he wasn’t thrilled about since he was afraid he’d make it worse, but Alfred (over the phone) walked him through it and Gar turned out fine, no further injuries. The only thing Gar got was an overprotective bird dad constantly wanting to be around him and Gar was 100% cool with that. They got some well deserved father-son time. I’m also going with Dick feels awful about Gar’s injury because he wasn’t around when it happened so he couldn’t try to catch him and hearing ‘Gar fell from the net wall and he’s not moving’ coming from a panicking Rachel threw him into a completely frantic state of mind. It’s all worry for Dick but Gar helps him feel better with his cheesy jokes and puns.

 I have a feeling after a few months around him, Gar and Rach start adopting Dick’s reactions to certain things and his mannerisms. Dick feels conflicted about the whole thing. There’s a lot about him he’d rather them not replicate. But Rachel doing his pondering face where he puts his hand over his mouth and Gar folding his arms and leaning against whatever he can when people talk to him, like Dick does quite often, is fine with him. If this teaches him anything, it’s to fix his own act and be a good example. 

Dick doesn’t favor either kid, they’re both his favorite but there’s certain things they do that would be considered his favorite things about said kid. Like the way Rachel hums or softly sings her favorite songs while painting/drawing and Gar’s loud bursts of genuine laughter that turn into snorts the longer he laughs. The surprise and love he felt when Rachel gave him a sketch she did of him, he put it on the fridge and probably went to cry in his bedroom so no one saw him. Dick’s not known for his laughter, and most people haven’t even seen him smile, yet Gar seems to get him to do both more than he’s ever in years. The first time Dick has laughed so hard that he started crying was to some sarcastic joke Gar made about a commercial when the living room had been silent for awhile. The day Gar’s favorite show is new is also one of Dick’s favorite days because when the episode is over Gar rushes to him all happy and tells him about it like: “dude, dude you won’t believe it I was so shocked!”. Honestly seeing Gar and Rachel truly happy is his favorite thing in the whole universe.

I feel like there’s been a few times where Dick has been sad that Gar and Rach aren’t really his kids. He wishes he could have given them a happy childhood. Rachel shouldn’t have had to be terrified of her abilities and lied to cause of them and Gar shouldn’t have had to raise himself and be shut away like he was some kind of monster. 

At some point before they all reached the tower or the day after, Dick had to take the kids shopping because where did their outfits come from (and room décor?). This is the first time they’ve all been in a normal situation together and Dick learned a few things. Rachel had no problem being around crowds of people due to her more normal upbringing while Gar stared wide eyed at everyone like he had no idea what to do. Dick assumed since Gar’s been isolated from the world around him for so long mixed with his enhanced senses, he got overwhelmed by all the noises and sights. So Dick told him to focus on him and his voice until his senses get used to the many things happening around him. And that Gar could hold Dick’s hand if he wanted, which he did. He also learned that every piece of clothing Rachel wanted was either black or dark blue, there is no in-between, making Dick jokingly wonder if Rachel is secretly related to Bruce. Then with Gar, all his clothing is bright and busy,, matching his personality. I’m also going with this conversation happened at some point: “Hey, Dick, why don’t you get yourself something while we’re here?” “I don’t have enough money for me, just you two.” “You don’t take whatever you want? I do.” “Umm.. no? That’d be steali-- YOU WHAT.”

On the note of clothes, both of the kids absolutely wear Dick’s clothes. If he can’t find one of his shirts or hoodies, he’s pretty sure one of the kids took it and it’ll be obvious it’s his even if it’s plain cause his clothes are huge on them. He never asked them why they steal his clothes but goes with it comforts them in some way.

One night when Rachel couldn’t sleep, she wandered out to the living room where Dick was still awake and watching tv. She tells him she couldn’t fall asleep so he gives her permission to stay up with him. Dick’s tv show quickly turned into a disney movie after that decision was made and Dick’s not the kind of person who has an easy time sitting through all the marshmallowy stories and singing of those movies but they make Rachel happy so he’ll sit through one for her. He’d rather Rachel watch a kid’s movie than his true crime shows anyway. Rach falls asleep cuddling Dick before the movie ends and instead of taking her back to her room, he lets her stay asleep there and goes to sleep himself because she’s comfy and he’s not going to disturb her. 

Gar expends so much energy during the day that when he goes to his room to chill before bed, he usually falls asleep with everything on in his room and without being covered up because he just passes out. Knowing that fact, Dick finishes the rest for him. Go in Gar’s room, take the ps4 controller out of his hand (cause he normally streams his shows on his ps4), turn everything off besides the green night light, cover Gar up and just because, place one of Gar’s tiger plushies with him, which leads to Gar the next day being like: “really dude? The tiger again. You’re not funny.” and Dick answering: “I’ll stop when you fall asleep correctly.”

Dick now knows how to braid hair multiple ways thanks to Rachel. When the original Titans returned, Dawn said how beautiful Rachel’s hair was, asking if she did it herself and when Rachel said “No, I wish I could. Dick did it for me, he’s great!” Dawn just stood there, not knowing how to respond because the Dick Grayson she remembered would chuckle and act like she didn’t even speak when she’d ask him to do her hair in the past. Gar’s s2 hair was done by Dick as well. The kids said “our hair is boring, can you fix it” and Dick’s inner Wayne surfaced.  

At some point the kids are going to call Dick their dad and he’ll cry, no doubt about that. By the nature of the show, I’d imagine it’d happen during or after some serious thing. For Rachel, it’d be during the s2 premiere. After Trigon is defeated and they’re all settling into Titans Tower, Dick goes to check on Rachel. The day was pretty rough for her. At first Rachel tries to act cool, like nothing is bothering her, but Dick can see through that and she knows. Eventually they get into a deep conversation about Rachel’s destiny, her father, and her feelings about it all. At some point Dick says something on the line of “I'm sorry you never had a real father” after Rachel compares her upbringing to Dick’s. Rachel smiles and tells him she has a real father, it’s him. Sure he’s a little late to the party, but he showed up when she needed him the most and stayed. This will be the first time Rachel will see Dick cry. For Gar, it’ll be after he gets over some sickness his powers gave him since they’re connected to his system and didn’t get finished by the Chief to be properly balanced, they can get out of line. He gets weak and loses his bright green hair/eyes, turning them a dull forest green. It’s not deadly, it’s just his version of the flu. When he’s finally over it and turns back to his normal self, Dick is all overly worried parent to him and Gar, being Gar, has to joke with him first: “jeez man, you are such a parent! All that worrying and pacing you were doing yikes! I think my legs would have fallen off haha!” before going into the soft stuff: “but, it shows that you’re a good one. better than my folks.. thanks, dad-- for, like, everything you did these few days.” then cue Dick pulling Gar into a hug and crying like ‘my purest angel son too precious for this world’.

Early on, Dick kind of sucked at being affectionate through words because Bruce was never with him, so he really didn’t know how to. Instead, he’d buy the kids things they’ve always wanted or things that reminded him of them, like a wooden pencil case carved in the shape of a raven’s feather for Rach and a tropical jurassic park themed backpack for Gar. The ‘hey I saw this and it reminded me of you so I bought it’ gifts are the kids’ favorites.

Ya know that cauliflower pizza Dick makes in s2? Yeah better believe I have a headcanon for why he makes that type of pizza specifically. Dick was having a hard time forgiving himself for killing Gar even if it was Trigon controlling him and this was when he didn’t know how to talk about his feelings, so instead of trying to have a conversation with Gar about it, he decided to do something else to say ‘I’m sorry’. He’s pretty good at cooking (thanks Alfred!) and knows Gar’s favorite food is pizza and that he’s vegan, there’s got to be something he can do with that and as we know, there is. A knock on his bedroom door made Gar remove himself from a video game and see what’s up. On the floor sat a pizza box with a note typed on that read: “I know this is stupid and I need to work on my communication skills, but I’m so sorry for what happened. I hope someday you can forgive me.” now my reasoning for why Gar jokes about said pizza with Rachel is because he and Dick don’t really have a lot that’s just theirs. Dick and Rachel have a lot they share together and Gar kind of wants something he can share with his new dad. So joking about it is his way of covering up his real feelings and no offence to his sister, but he knows how she gets when she feels left out of something so it’s best if he keeps this one thing between him and Dick.

On the weekends aka no training days, Dick normally takes Rach and Gar out so they can do normal kid things. He refuses to be like Bruce and keep the kids shut in the tower all day to ‘keep them safe’ like he did with Dick in the Manor. They need fresh air, sunshine, and fun. Plus he’s with them so if trouble shows up whether by one of their powers or something else, he’ll take care of it. Day activities will be: going to places like the park or the mall, get lunch somewhere, go to the store cause grocery shopping day is Saturday, make dinner at home, then finish the day with a movie. If the daytime is busy with over-do chores and a long time at the store, then night activities will be: going to dinner, either going on a relaxing drive while the kids play their favorite songs over the radio or going on a walk. Both include slushies and snacks for Gar and Rach and coffee for Dick. The last thing of the day is still a movie but more than likely the kids will be asleep before it’s even halfway done and Dick has to carry them to bed. But that’s okay with him, he wouldn’t change it for the world.

There used to be a lot more for the canonverse but I added them into my Rewrite au cause they were already leaning towards au territory,, you’ll see them in my next post

I’ll probably turn some of these into a short fic at some point, but if you see one you’d like to write about, go for it! I’d love to read it!

tagging @not-so-mundane-after-all-97​ real quick cause I know she wants to see this post,,

[danny-chase]

Chapters: 1/1 Fandom: Batman (Comics), Batgirl (Comics) Rating: Teen And Up Audiences Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Relationships: Stephanie Brown & Damian Wayne, Stephanie Brown & Dick Grayson Characters: Stephanie Brown, Damian Wayne, Dick Grayson, Barbara Gordon (momentarily), Alfred Pennyworth (mentioned) - Character Additional Tags: Stephanie Brown POV, Batfamily (DCU) Feels, Chocolate Milk, post mission talks, Damian Wayne is a brat with a heart of gold, Stitches, Canon Typical Violence, but not for long, because i like fluff better, Fluff, Stephanie Brown is Batgirl, Dick Grayson is Batman, Damian Wayne is Robin, Sneezing, Coughing, Dick Grayson is Damian Wayne's almost parent, Stephanie Brown is Damian Wayne's almost big sister, And kind of Dick's little sister Summary:

Steph hasn't worked with the new Batman and Robin duo long, but she doesn't hesitate to come when they call for backup. Their family's a little rough around the edges, but she'll do what she can to smooth things out.

“C’mon, faster!” Stephanie hated when Barbara seemed anxious, when she was anxious, generally something was about to go wrong. Really, really, wrong.

 “I’m homing in on the coordinates.” Barbara was driving on autopilot, but she couldn’t resist saying the line. Damian’s tracker blinked closer and closer. The kid had run off earlier that night, Dick, however, was getting better at predicting when it would happen and followed. She’d been on call for backup, Damian needed space, but he was also a magnet for trouble and unfortunately for them-

“Robin retreat! Retreat! Get out of here!” Dick screamed over the comms. The kid shouldn’t be out in the first place, still recovering from a concussion. She rounded the corner. Victor Zsasz was pushing forward aggressively trying to circumvent Batman to get a stab at Robin. Dick was holding his own but kept taking hits for a dazed looking Damian.

“Get Robin and get out! Maneuver 23.” Barbara commanded. She was seconds away, Zsasz was too close, she wasn’t going to make it, not going to make it-

 “CATCH!” She complied, automatically responding to Barbara’s harsh tone, spreading her arms as the bike swerved right.

 “JUMP!” Damian appeared to do the same with Dick, who tackled Zsasz out of range.

 “FUCK!” She yelled, because Damian jumped right into the path of her oncoming bike and-

 They grasped each other’s wrists in a practiced motion, using momentum to swing Damian onto the backseat of the bike.

 “Holy fuck.” She whispered. Hadn’t expected that to work. Sure, they’d done it a billion times practicing, but like… damn. That was freaking awesome. But also-

 “Are you okay?” She turned to look back at a pale Damian, blood staining the right side of his uniform. He nodded curtly, she could see a sheen of sweat glistening under the streetlights. It took him a moment to collect his thoughts.

 “We cannot retreat, Batman needs backup! Turn around at once!” He demanded, swaying in his spot. On a motorcycle. She might die for this, but she turned around, pulled him closer (surprisingly without argument) and started applying pressure to his side. One hand on the wound, the other keeping him propped upright. Maybe she would die, but Damian would fall off over her dead body.

 “Yeah no, I’m just gonna try to keep your blood on the inside till we get to the Bunker.” She felt a raindrop plop on her forehead, all the more reason to keep on course. Damian was already injured and tired, she would not be the one responsible for making his situation worse. “Then you can bleed out in peace.”

   Stephanie sighed as she swirled milk and cocoa together on the stove, rain pattering steadily outside. Where would she be if she’d had a normal father, or a normal life? She had a standing invite to some party; she could be out with friends. But some little gremlin child would have been murdered by Zsasz blocks away and no. She wouldn’t trade Damian’s life for normality. She was Stephanie Brown after all, abnormal was her middle name, and she accepted it with pride.

 Sure, she wasn’t mixing alcoholic drinks right now, but she was mixing chocolate milk and that was close enough. Damian clomped up the stairs, and angrily settled at the table. Think of the gremlin, and he shall appear.

 “You shouldn’t have retreated.” He muttered, slumping in the seat. His cheeks were already flush from the exertion of walking up the steps.

 “And you should go to bed.” He glared at her, looking utterly nonthreatening in his pajamas. He was wearing one of Dick’s old t-shirts, oversized, draping down past his elbows. He must have his own clothes, but she’d never seen him sleep in anything else.

 “Then why are you preparing two mugs of hot chocolate?” He asked smugly. Well, as smugly as he could with twelve stitches in his side.

 “Because I know you won’t listen to me.” The grin was replaced with a frown. “But I don’t mind, that’s why I made enough for two.” She quickly continued. Damian stared ahead at a place on the table. She weighed her next words. They both knew fully well that he wouldn’t sleep until Dick made it home in one piece, and for that matter that she would either. Leaving Damian alone with his thoughts seemed cruel under the circumstances.

“You didn’t listen to me earlier.” He accused agitatedly, breaking the silence.

 “I don’t make a habit of listening to Robins.” She said with a smirk, attempting to lighten the mood. She carefully poured the steaming cocoa into the mugs, keenly aware of Damian’s eyes following her every move.

 “You listen to Gordon.” He pouted. She placed a mug in front of him and sat down across from him.

 “Most of the time, and she’s not a Robin. I don’t listen to you, Tim, or Dick, and certainly not Jason.”

 “Why not?” He challenged, not making a move to touch his mug, still glaring at her with a dark expression on his face. “You were a Robin, were you not? You think you’re above us-”

 “No, Dames, you gotta read the situation you know?” She took a long sip of cocoa. Damian crossed his arms. She sighed. “Look, if we always listened to Dick, he’d be dead already.” He nodded carefully. “Same thing with you and Tim.” His nose scrunched at the mention of Tim.

 “Don’t compare me to-”

 “Whatever it is, I’m not, I’m just saying, I’d be a lot happier if you weren’t shish kabobbed by Zsasz.” His brow furrowed. “Okay fine, I messed up, you probably would have been fine. We shouldn’t have retreated. But you were down, and we made a judgement call – not just me, Dick would rather die than-” Damian’s eyes went wide. “Poor choice of words, I take it back. He’s not going to die, he just…” God, what was she doing? What was she even trying to say?

 “I know you’re not worried, because you’re you, but if I was you, I would be worried, but I shouldn’t be worried, because Dick’s a badass, so he’ll be fine, and knowing that you’re safe will help him stay focused on the fight. So you’re helping by staying right here, yeah?” She leaned back against the seat. Smooth, real smooth.

 Damian’s lips were pursed by the end of her rambling. “I’m not worried.” She heard him mumble under his breath. He took a sip of cocoa. “Grayson is a competent fighter; he would not be so easily defeated.” She pretended not to hear his voice wobble slightly at the end. The poor kid.

 “He’ll be home any minute now.” She assured.

 “And he’ll yell at you for not making enough for him.” He added sagely.

 “Then he’ll yell at you for not being in bed.” Damian rolled his eyes.

 “I shall already be in bed by the time he makes it up the stairs.” So confident in his abilities. Dick probably let him think he got away with it.

 “Well, then he’ll anxiously pace outside of your room, and peak in to fuss over your stiches.” She predicted. Damian snorted, and took another sip of cocoa.

 “Damian, you could have been seriously hurt, you’ve got to be more careful!” He perfectly imitated Dick’s voice. Steph had to fight back laughter and swallow her cocoa. “Why did you give him sugar, it’s his bedtime?” He directed at her.

 “Robin, cease with the hot chocolate immediately.” She croaked out in a gravelly Batman impression.

 “Holy hot chocolate Batman!” Stephanie lost it as he did a perfect impression of Dick’s normal voice. Damian allowed himself a small smile.

 “Oh my God, you have to teach me how to do that.”

 “Are you sure you have the talent for it?” He asked smugly. She brushed off the comment. Smug Damian was better than sad and worried Damian.

 “Sure, also can you do Scooby-Doo?” Damian’s brow furrowed.

 “Who?”

 “What do you mean who!?” She half yelled. Damian flinched. “Okay, since we’re already up, you’re getting an education tonight, we’re moving to the couch, let’s go, move it people.”

   Two episodes later, Damian’s wide eyes still looked through the screen rather than at it. Not all things, she supposed, could be fixed with dumb cartoons and hot chocolate.

 “Brown?” He softly spoke, as the credits played.

 “Mm?” Silence resounded through the room. Whatever question Damian had died in his throat. “I’m sure he’ll be back any minute, he’s probably overseeing the trip to Arkham.” She guessed.

 “Yes.” Another pause. “He’ll be upset when he arrives home.”

 “He won’t be too upset.” Damian tucked his knees to his chest. “Everyone made it home safe.”

 “Father would have been angry.” She couldn’t deny that. Bruce was, well, Bruce.

 “But Dick isn’t Bruce.” She let the words hang in the air for a moment. “He was Robin too once, you know?” Dick got mad, heck, he killed the Joker like three days after she first met him. He’d been upset with her, for being Batgirl, but his anger wasn’t like Bruce’s, and it hadn’t lasted for long.

 “I know.” He turned to face her on the couch. “He’ll say he’s disappointed.”

 “Ah.” Her heart melted. “That’s always worse.” Damian rolled his eyes.

 “I’ve had worse punishments.” He paused. Damn the League. “But it’s… different.” Steph could sympathize.

 “My dad used to lock me in closets when he was mad.” Damian nodded.

 “I would too.” She groaned. Sometimes she was trying to have meaningful heartfelt conversations with a ten-year-old.

 “Brat. I’m trying to have a moment.” She complained. He fell silent, shrugging his shoulders, possibly as an attempt at an apology. “The point being my mom was always disappointed. And just because one sucked more than the other, didn’t mean both didn’t suck.”

 “Hmm.” Damian leaned back against the pillows. “But I had to do something, he was,” he paled slightly, his eyes widening, “Zsasz was going to kill children again.” He looked at her earnestly. “I couldn’t let him-”

 “Look, no one’s mad at you for trying to do something good. It’s just like… we worry about you, okay?” Damian rolled his eyes again.

 “No need I’m-”

 “You’re staying up until Dick gets back, want to remind me why that is?” He turned to face the rain smeared window. “It’s the same for him, and the same for me. We worry about you too, okay?”

 “You shouldn’t.” Damian muttered. “I’m perfectly capable on my own, I’m trained in twenty-”

 “Doesn’t matter how trained you are if you’re concussed.” She pointed out.

 “It didn’t matter if I was concussed in the League.” Assholes.

 “Well, this isn’t the League, and we care if you’re concussed.”

 “Whatever.” He fell silent after, gluing his eyes back to the screen in an attempt to block her out.

 “Just, let me know next time, and I’ll come with you.” Maybe she was imagining it, but she caught a minute nod.

 Carefully, she reached out, projecting her moves, and ruffled his hair. He didn’t seem much happier, some of the tension bled out of his shoulders. Maybe she didn’t know what she was doing, but whatever mediocre amount of comfort she could supply would have to be enough. She leaned back into her end of the couch, content to sit in silent companionship and let her mind wander off, no longer focused on the cartoon, but on a family forged in chaos.

   “M’ere bud, time for bed.” Someone whispered to her right. Cracking open her eyes slowly, the time on the television box read 3:28. Damian groggily groaned in protest next to her. As her eyes adjusted, she could make out the vague outline of Dick sweeping a tired Damian (who was clearly feigning sleep) into his arms. “You should get some sleep too.” He hissed at her, as his footsteps padded away.

 She stretched out on the couch, four hours of sleep, that wasn’t too bad, but her neck was definitely stiff after that. She groaned, turning on the lamp next to her, shutting her eyes again and slowly allowing them to adjust to the light. Dick popped his head back into the doorway.

 “You need anything? The guest room has some spare clothes in your size, we have extra toothbrushes, you can use my shampoo if you want.” He rambled off. It was strange, she could never tell if he was being nice to make up for his initial rejection, or if that was just how he was.

 “Don’t be too hard on Damian.” She curled into her spot on the couch. Dick stepped forward into view, leaning against the doorframe. A pink bathrobe was draped over his shoulder, his wet hair dripping. He tiredly sunk against the wall.

 “I won’t be.” He slid into a squat, then all the way down to the floor. “Was he mad I followed him?”

 “Probably. I think he was more worried you wouldn’t come home.” Damian’s last experience with Zsasz had been… unpleasant. And the villain had carried a grudge ever since.

 “Oh. Sorry it took so long, Alfred kick you guys to bed or something?” She nodded. They’d been whisked out of the command room before she’d hardly tugged off her cape. No doubt Damian would have tried to leave again if they’d been listening on the comms.

 “You’re okay?” It was so weird. She was sitting on a couch, talking down to a cowl-less Batman in a pink bathrobe, sitting on the floor.

 “Fit as a fiddle.” He sneezed, as if on cue.

 “It’s raining pretty hard.” Her eyes flicked towards the window.

 “You don’t say.” He deadpanned, following her gaze. “It let up about an hour ago. Zsasz is back and Arkham, we found the kids he grabbed, I was trying to track down any relatives.” She nodded, Gotham’s foster care system was abysmal, and the social workers overbooked. Finding relatives could save a kid from ending up in a supervillain’s lair.

 “All’s well that ends well.” Dick sneezed again. “I could have helped.”

 “Babs and I had it under control.” She rolled her eyes, typical of the ‘big kids’ to leave her in the kiddies room. “Thank you for watching him.” He nodded at the empty mugs. “It was sweet of you to stick around.” Warmth swelled in her chest at the remark, she didn’t need his approval of course, but it was nice to have it.

 “Yeah well, cut him some slack for me yeah?” He opened his mouth to reply, then paused to cough for a bit.

 “I won’t be hard on him, but no patrol until his stiches heal.” He assured, regaining his composure.

 “I’m sure you won’t patrol until your cold’s passed.” She commented sarcastically. It would do the boys good to spend some time together anyways.

 “Did Babs put you up to this? I-”, sneeze, “told her I was fine. You guys are worse than Alfred.”

 “Nope.” She popped the p. “But I think your kid might feel a little bit guilty about tonight, and it wouldn’t hurt to stay in with him.”

 “He’s not my…” Dick stared up at the ceiling. Tucking his knees up to his chin, just the same as Damian, he went silent.

 “He’s your kid.” She said after a moment. Dick smiled ruefully.

 “He’s your kid too.” She snorted. He was like the little brother she’d never had, not that she’d admit it.

 “Not a chance, he’s all yours and Alfred’s. Babs and I don’t work with minors.” Aside from the times she had.

 “Mmmhmm. So that’s why you were drinking hot chocolate and watching cartoons with him, because he’s not your kid. I guess you don’t think of him as family” He sighed. “And to think, I was going to bring you to the aquarium with us tomorrow, but if we aren’t your family then why even-”

 “Woah, woah, woah. Let’s not go that far, I want to see him next to penguins-er I mean, I want to see the uhh... You know what nope, not ashamed, I want to see the look on his face at the touch tank.” She paused. “Aren’t you rewarding bad behavior with that though?”

 “Well, don’t worry about it, he’s my kid after all.” He chided smugly. “In all seriousness, I just want to distract him long enough he doesn’t go out again.” Another sneeze. “Jeez, stupid rain. Also, Babs is coming, it’s a party.”

 “You’re sure he won’t see it as a reward?” She wasn’t taking children’s psychology for nothing after all.

 “Nah, knowing him, he might take it as a punishment.” He closed his eyes, leaning back into the frame. “But, I try to keep capes and normal life separate, he’ll be grounded from patrol, but I won’t ground him during the day for stuff he pulls at night.” That seemed reasonable. “He’s been doing really well with homeschool.” He opened his eyes again, looking fondly at the opposite doorframe. “I think he’ll really like the aquarium, he’s been studying aquatic life recently and-”

 Dick mumbled on for a while, listing all Damian’s accomplishments, how he was multiple grade levels ahead, and scoring well in all the classes they made for him. How he could go on to do anything he wanted, was on track to take college courses by the time he was in high school, and how bright his future was. Again, she was glad her life wasn’t normal, as he rambled on and on, pride shining on his face.

 “He’s so your kid.” She interrupted after a coughing fit, having lost track of the conversation. Dick blinked at her. “Bedtime.” He nodded, sneezing halfway through.

 “Bedtime.”

  They didn’t make it to the aquarium, as predictably, Dick was running a fever by the morning. But that didn’t stop the party. Barbara brought soup, Alfred made cookies, and Steph settled on the couch next to Damian, picking up where they left off, marathoning Scooby Doo.

 Dick picked apart the episodes from his isolated recliner (they quarantined him three feet away), Damian chiming in to predict the villain’s identity. Barbara grumbled about normal people being easier to watch TV with, and Alfred settled in a chair by the door. If Cass were here, she’d bounce off the walls, and Tim would lie on the floor. Pieces were broken and missing, but as the remaining members of her pseudo-family chattered away, she had hope that things, eventually, would work out.