#and then what if the ppl i live with dont like me or vice versa sigh i need to sleep but i also kind of cant wait because i will be on my

[upgradebitch]

everything is changing and i’m in pain sigh

[phinamina]

hey guys kuzaang headcanons.

(most found in my dc server........) 1; ok this MAY seem stupid though i Dont Care if anyone here thinks it is but avatars have like dreams of their memories from their past lives and can get like something close to psychosomatic pain ? The Point is aang getting these nightmares and crap at a sleepover w kuzon nd kuzon comforts him after cuz he woke kuzon up by screaming 2; kuzon would have loved the marble trick (which was replied to with 'kuzon would go beast mode over the marble trick actually' by tumblr user meeyow4419 which i think explains it very well very true.) 3; kuzon cant cook for shit 4; kuzon did NOt believe whatever sozin was sending out he gave each newspaper the stink eye. 5; kuzon taught aang all the fire nation dances and bumi cheered them on in the bg 6; bumi was definitely their wing man 7; we all know therescultural differences between the 4 nations. what i need to see is kuzon explaining things of rthe fire nation that aang doesnt understand and vice versa 8; kuzon kissing each and every one of aangs arrows. thank you 9; physical touch. slinging an arm over each others shoulder, hugging, kissing, holding hands, holding arms, laying on top of each other, putting legs over each other legs, touching knees, standing close to each other, kuzon doesn't know what personal space is!, kicking the others foot to get their attention, leaning into each others space, aang doing/playing with kuzons hair, falling asleep on each other, and more. they are really big on physical affection 10; dancing. just dancing I don't feel the need to elaborate. at festivals, in the kitchen, in the middle of a forest, wherever. just dancing 11; they frequently send letters to each other, and when they started dating there was an occasional love letter in there. 12; kuzaang kinda just happened they never actually were like. date me. they just. started dating I guess. they don't even know when it occured 13: drool when they sleep. 14; they also uh. cuddle when they sleep. kuzons woken up with a wet shirt more than once. he gets embarrassed when he realizes he drooled on his pillow the whole night. actually have an art piece 4 this! https://www.tumblr.com/kitkatperce/748416474997260288/wow-this-is-gay

15; promises that sound oddly like wedding vows. 16; hip hip hooray!!! x LETS FUCKING GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!! (after their first kiss) 17; moles x freckles 18; they share their food w each other. aang splits a lot of fruits (its usually an orange because he somehow always has one on hand) 19; aang gets very giggly and avoids eye contact after like. they kiss on the lips even once. 20; they both still blush like madmen with any physical affection 21; uncontrollable laughter 22; they don't care what time it is if the other is upset they r GOING to comfort them 23; aang sending super intense vibes to kuzon so he dreams of them sharing a sandwich together (im jk) 24; devotion. yeah ur my bsf ofc im in love with you and will find you and hang out with you in every universe. lets kiss 25; they both yap a whole lot but when it comes down to it kuzon loves to listen to aang blabber about absolutely nothing and everything at the same time 26; cheesy nicknames 27; air nomads dont marry but aang doesnt actually mind if kuzon is like 'my husband' or whatever he thinks its super endearing. some ppl say they are too young for marriage and aang has to explain tho LMAO 28; idiots doing idiotic things. get down from that tall ass mountain 29; aang likes to fidget with kuzons hands. kuzon lets him

30; aang ranting to gyatso abt kuzon

31; gyatso finds it so fucking funny when aang gets jealous bcuz aang says “jealousy is not a good thing. let go of it” and he gets all pissy when hes jealous

32. aang at a sleepover with kuzon removing jewelry and stuff basically js getting ready to mimimimi time and kuzon (whos been ready for a lil bit honestly) just watching him lovingly from the bed. sighhh

33. aang saying he doesnt accept long lasting things and kuzon like. oh ok. yoi dont have to. and aangs like can u put it on 4 me….. he only takes it off for the night (and whenever he has a sleepover w kuzon kuzon unclasps it for him)

34. kuzons firebending with aang is super gentle comparitively

[p1nkc4tb0t]

OK GUYS IMMA GO ON A RANT ABT THE NOVEL UNWIND, OK? OK.

HOLY SHIT.

guys it was so fucking good i swear.

ok so yeah, warning spoilers n shit. yeah.

ok so i really like the concept of the whole Bill of Life thing, unwinding especially.

like holy smokes was it good.

OK SO IK ITS NOT THE MOST POPULAR NOVEL I DONT THINK SO FOR MY MOOTS WHO R SEEING THIS THIS IS THE GENERAL CONCEPT: since abortions r banned pretty much, ppl either “stork” unwanted children or “unwind” children when they became unwanted. like the story starts off abt three unwinds, being unwound for completely different reasons. Connor was like, a troublesome kid and his parents just didn’t want that so they signed the orders to get him unwound. i missed why Risa was unwound but im pretty sure the state house just didn’t have much room for her anymore(she got storked there i think. she really didn’t grab my attention at the beginning sadly). Lev came from a Christian family, and churches make everyone sacrifice one of their children for God by unwinding them second they turn 13, Lev being one of them(it’s considered an honor)

OK SO the concept of storking is that, the mother delivers a child, doesn’t want it, leaves it at some person’s doorstep and then it’s “finders keepers.” however if they are caught they have to take the kid back and legally obliged to keep it. same with the finders keepers situation, got storked and ain’t no one at ur doorstep? legally obliged to keep it like it or not. however Connor’s parents once got storked and passed it into the neighbors house, and the baby rotated for a week and back to their house, but already sick and dying. Connor then gets traumatized and further on in the book he’s so overridden with the memory that when a bitch got storked she yell at them (Connor abd Risa) to take it back even tho the kid wasn’t theirs.

the concept of unwinding is that legally between 13-18 your guardians can send you to a harvest camp where you’re taken apart and given these parts to those who need it. like for example: you got unwound, taken to a harvest camp, they take your hands and give it to a guy who lost his across the fucking continent. ppl literally stopped trying to cure things, just replaced faulty organs with healthy ones. and no one really knows what’s going on in those harvest camps. do they kill you off immediately or do they wait and wait for weeks on weeks to get to you while you never know when’s your last day.

SO ANYWAY

I really like Connor’s relationship with Hayden, and tbh if they would make them canonically in love i’d be the happiest person on this planet. but again that would cause even further complications w the plot so i get it ig. but at the same time i don’t. Connor never really struck me as a cishet dude even from the beginning of the story, and though him abd Risa r a very good pair i’d just kinda like it more if they paired him up with Hayden. cuz first of all it would add on to tge reason he got unwound in the first place. abd like, i want a gay protagonist in a horror book is that really too much to ask?

same thing with Lev and CyTy, tho i see them more as moirails. yk, homestuck. heheh. no bc they’re so caring for eachother it’s crazy. but again i don’t see them in a romantic relationship, i just rlly like their dynamic. live laugh love how Lev was willing to go through with CyTy’s shit and vice versa.

Hayden and CyTy gotta b my fab characters frfr. anyway so CyTy’s name is actually Cyrus, but he has an eighth of a brain of a kid who got unwound and his name was Tyler. so like, he sometimes does things that Tyler would do but himself won’t, leading them to Tyler’s parents’ house and it actually made me tear up.

ALSO RISA IS AN EMO GINGER. NOT DEBATABLE. I DO NOT CARE IF IT CAN NEVER B CANON, I LIVE FOR EMO GINGER RISA.

GUYS THIS BOOK IS FUCKING BEAUTIFUL GO READ IT

i NEED to make a Homestuck Unwind AU

(imma just tag 4 moots i think would find this interesting @hiddencattoes @kovuspams @r3z1l1c1ous @imgoingtoeatyourfirstbornchild sorry guys this felt necessary)

[nerves-nebula]

You do not have to answer all of these but these questions have been circulating my mind and I have been writing them down.

What would a gorilla shifter look like in human form, maybe just like a human but really hairy?

Do women moose shifters have beards?

Do women hyena shifters have pseudopenises or would that disappear because the biology has to translate to be human?

Can fish shifters become merfolk so they dont drown 500 ft below the surface?

Can all species have kids together and would they be hybrids or instead it would be a 50/50 chance between one of the 2 species of the parents?

Do they lay eggs in human form?

Would a pregnant person's fetus shift into an egg and then they can lay it early? Or would it not shift with them so they have to wait until they give birth before they can shift again?

Do they ever shift in the sleep and then like die because they were crammed into a tiny hole as a roach or something?

Does their human size relate to the species size? (As in msot elephants would be tall as humans)

Are the human body shapes always going to resemble the animal so that you can kind of guess what species they would be broadly?

Can anyone turn into a bacteria colony?

gonna adress these in order

a gorilla shifter in human form would look like a human. ive prolly done a bad job of showing this cuz i like giving characters animal traits, but their human forms are 100% human, and are only affected by their animal traits if they choose it to me. so wells in his human form would only have a tail if he decided he should, similarly Avin has simply decided to keep his sheep eyes at all points of time

some women moose shifters would have beards because some women have beards period, but i can see it being a cultural thing to keep some aspects of your animal form like that. so really it depends.

see above answers, they would be 100% human in their human forms and if a shifter had any genital differences in human form it would be unrelated to their animal forms

fish shifters can become mermaids if they want to, but they wouldnt look like fantasy mermaids and it would be kind of culturally weird. its not uncommon for shifter to mix human and animal traits, but living full time as a mermaid would definitely be seen as a strange alternative lifestyle

all species can have kids together in human form, and there's no chance of mixing the species unless you're animal forms could mix. so for example, a wolf and a coyote could have a coywolf kid, but a panther and a sheep could only possibly have panther OR sheep kids. about 50/50 is probably right.

i dont know. maybe if they really want to??? it's not a solid NO from me tho lmao

you do have to wait until your not pregnant again to shift, unfortunately. most people choose to stay in human form, especially if they're a mixed species couple. but if you were both dogs i think you could stay in dog form for however long dog pregnancies last. and some ppl chose to do that cuz the birth is easier that way.

no, your body would wake up or stop before that happened. though you can shift and partial shift in your sleep, its just not a sudden enough process to kill you.

not really? i mean from a design perspective i have a habit of taking inspiration from their animal forms to design them, but canonically i dont think the correlation is 100%. like you might have spots if your animal form does, but i dont think being a big animal necessarily means your gonna be a big human and vice versa.

also not really. sometimes they will, sometimes they wont. i think originally when i made this, they kind of did, but now i think itd be more interesting if the body types were more varied.

SADLY no. nothing that small

anyway, THANK YOU FOR BEING INTERESTED FASHDFSADFHSDAGA i was obsessed with this story when i was like 12 and i thought no one would ever care about it agsdhugshd

[thetrashywritingwitch]

I don't get how couples or ppl in relationships can work together as in, be coworkers in the same vicinity/building day in and day out. Esp when you also live together. That means... no time to yourself ever?? Also associating work and career with home and relationship with virtually no separation. I did date a coworker over a decade ago and lemme say awkward as hell when we broke up like six months later 😐🤪

Also like... having almost *too much* in common with a partner. Which sounds weird, but I don't wanna date a copy of myself with identical interests and goals and routines. I'm an artist and no offense to ppl who do this, u must be made of diff stuff, but I really dont think I could date another creative person unless we were in totally different fields. Like, I'm in animation and a partner might be in graphic design or 3D modeling.

Dont ask where this is coming from bc whooooo knows, maybe I'm dehydrated bc water anon hasnt bugged me in a while 💦 but I'm very grateful that my partner is -100 on creativity and I'm -100 in software coding and we have overlapping hobbies and personalities and opinions but are also autonomous, independent ppl with separate friend groups and lives that dont need to overlap 24/7.

Idk I think some folks just underestimate how weird or difficult or monotonous it could be to date someone in an identical field. What if I have a shitty boss who I hate but my partner still has to work closely with them and be amicable bc we got bills to pay? Or god forbid my partner *is* my boss jfc keep that kink at home I would quit before that happens

Anyway. All this to say is not everything in a relationship needs to overlap in a 99% venn diagram. Your friends can just be *your friends* and not your partner's friends, too. And vice versa. You dont have to be involved in everything they do. They dont need to play every game you play or like every band you enjoy. There just needs to be mutual respect for each other's differences (meaning shit that is inconsequential and not y'know, whether or not trans people deserve basic human decency) and understanding of a need for alone time by yourself. Which is 100% fine and not selfish to ask for.

Here's my cat :3

[parkminijiminie]

Okay this may sound delulu, but the video kinda makes sense to me and fits into what I believe Jikook's relationship currently is. I believe that they had feelings for each other in the past and were possibly hooking up (I dont think they ever tried to be anything more than fwb given many circumstances BUT I think they cared deeply for each other and always will), but from the beginning of 2022 until now, I feel sth happened to them and they just stopped with whatever they were doing. Especially during the late 2022/early 2023, like some of the anons here said, I felt, based on Jk's lives, that he was missing Jm meaning that they probably didnt see each other as much (I mean how could he not know Jimins schedule if he was more than his friend) and during that time, I rly got the notion that maybe Jk was friendzoned by Jimin or Jm didn't wanna fuck around with him anymore, so it makes sense to me that JK was playing the field and seeing other ppl (or maybe it was vice versa, maybe Jk was playing the field and Jimin didn't wanna witness that cuz let's face it, as I think that they had sth going on at some point, no matter how much of good friends you stay with that person, it may suck to see them with others).

Still, I'm curious ab whether that woman is his actual exclusive gf cuz based on Kooks lives (especially the naked one), I strongly got the notion that he is single/not in a committed relatinship now or is just casually hooking up. Anyway, these are all just speculations and this was a long rant, but I have so many mixed feelings ab the entire situation so I have to share and you seem like a rational person with great opinions on all this🥲

I defo agree on this take. I think JK was kind of in his "man whore" era in early 2023 (I'm not judging, nothing wrong with it if it's between consensual adults) but maybe things are getting different now. If it is confirmed that JK has a steady girlfriend, than obviously this theory doesn't add up snd I'll happily give it up, but for now this is on par with what I think too.

[oswlld]

2022: A Summary

Post your most popular and/or favorite edit/gifset from each month (it’s okay to skip months!)

tagged by (1) @hoe-biwan (2) @casualavocados (3) @dramaism (4) @i-got-the-feels & (5) @talays-portkey 💛💛  WOW thank you all for thinking of me, happy to oblige (also gonna plug the one i did last year for edits i made in 2021; idek why i formatted the post that way maybe dont look at it fjslkd just go look at everyone elses)

January most popular — bad buddy ep10 quote set: itll always be the most memorable quote set, since it was the first live ep that i caught after binging it favorite(s) — 1) bad buddy + giovanni’s bedroom: i remember seeing a photoshoot set with this format and knew i wanted to replicate it (prior to this i usually am insp by quotes first, worry about formats/layouts later); 2) bad buddy + hadestown “promises”: because im so predictable and still think about them when i hear the song

February most popular — bad buddy + kaveh akbar quote: the fact that the most popular edit ended up being the valentines day post is so satisfying favorite(s) — bad buddy + pride & prejudice: i actually thought that this was going to be the most popular and it was a close race (eight notes apart lol)

March most popular — bad buddy random screencap #19: a requested screencap that is most beloved by all, what else is there to say favorite(s) — 1) semantic error ep2 set: of all the episodic sets i made for the show, i really liked how this came together thematically; 2) the good place + eleanor quote: i can only count in one hand edits that i’ve thought about making for YEARS before actually making it, but this is prob up on top of the rest, in terms of execution

April most popular — doctor who + the girl who died quote: i think my defining trait in my dw edits is flipping quotes between the two and even though it’s not a new concept to do them, im never not thinking about them and what other moments to edit with favorite(s) — bad buddy + jane eyre: don’t get me wrong, the clara edit is also a fave, but this is tied for best because look at them 😭

May most popular — star wars + leia/padme parallel: not my first sw edit, but the first one ive done while a show was airing; also would like to shout out to the screencap galleries out there for both the sw series and movies, the real mvps favorite(s) — moon knight + head/heart/hands: i have an inside joke with myself with this edit and the tags give it way a bit lol

June most popular — star wars + anakin/darth progression: ofc this is the edit with the most notes overall. hellsite pls never change lol favorite(s) — 1) doctor who + weeping angels: not sure what it about me and making my edits as complicated as possible because it becomes a whole mental marathon, with just me and my phone but im proud of this one; 2) vice versa + series trailer: ive repeated this sentiment in other posts so i wont go into it again here, but this edit will also be so special for me

July most popular — star wars + princess leia: hi, miss you space mom favorite(s) — vice versa ep3 + caitlyn siehl: i think of all the episodic edits, there’s only a fair few that doesn’t carry the flipped/mirrored text effect; all this to say that i am very happy how this one turned out, out of all the versions of the effects (PLUS this quote still makes me teary eyed in hindsight, ugh baby boi i KNOW what youre capable of I KNOW)

August most popular — taylor swift + midnights announcement: i knew that i wanted to make something ts related after having made a few for red tv, so this came together pretty quickly favorite(s) — sense8 + birthday!: i love that a few tags from other ppl pointed out a lack of Will… it’s, uh, intentional lmao

September most popular — the little mermaid + D23 teaser: i still get chills favorite(s) — vice versa ep11 part one: look, i dont miss making these edits each week because, again, the mental marathon i put myself through lol but ep11 [1/4] is now imprinted on my soul and i could not do the ep justice in ONE post (i also made myself cry making the last edit but thats not why its my fav lol)

October most popular — doctor who + regen redux parallel: 50th anniv ep, my beloved favorite(s) — 1) bad buddy + mastermind lyrics: absolutely not my original idea lol but one that i reallllly wanted to make once it consumed my waking hours; 2) vice versa ep12 quote set: its a real color to me

November most popular AND favorite — andor + maarva quote: WHAT A SHOW! WHAT A QUOTE! WHAT A CHARACTER!! I MISS IT TERRIBLY

December most popular — doctor who + google search: it seriously warms my heart that the most popular edit ended being my birthday post and with my most beloved, my url namesake, my queen favorite(s) — reset + best 2022 series: i mean, the clara edit is also def a faaav fav, but i’m so attached to this show and worked so hard to make this for sam lmao (not sure what it is about the two-row sets that are really intimidating to me but thats a whole other matter) very few ppl know how long ive been dyinggg to make this all year, so i was so happy to see that someone requested it. im gonna look at it a little longer before i post this... *sigh*

--

i think everyone has been tagged at this point, but feel free to make one yourself if you have not been tagged yet and tag me

[pinkseas]

'parasocial bestie' im on my knees cry laughing like a pathetic peasant at the feet of a king blessing me id put an indicator everytime i jump here but its not like my ask specifically with 748274 word paragraphs is easy to miss in your inbox anyway ANYWAY WORDS WOW YOUR WORDS;;,;...... i could just pick out every term and phrase your described like a scientist thinking wow so that's what it is THATS EXACTLY HOW IT GOES about this xiaolumi dynamic i get crazy on that intrudes my thouhgt processes 98% of the time

qpr xiaolumi gets me haywire my brain neurons tangling 24/7 i get them to a dynamic so far out of romance to a 'love' that is all about understanding and care that i dont even MIND they're friends until the end, that idt "xiaolumi" is the better word than just xiao and lumine. it just fits, so much about them rlly fits in entirety both history and present its not about protection its about Reaching Out, holding hands being a go-to physical closeness just for warmth and security they're right There; the shoulder bumps, their backs on each other this 'quiet love' the 'not vulnerable in one of them but vulnerable to each other' THEY'RE STRONG FOR OTHERS BUT WEAK TO THEMSELVES. 'they're able to share such a unique loneliness, the fact that in not being understood by anyone around them they're able to understand each other' BANGS MY HEAD ON THE TABLE FALLS OF MY CHAIR it's really just!! this description is still commonly used but it's such a different case with them that it hits HARD (or maybe i'm just biased idc nonetheless eyes xlmi only)

what i Think would differ between my xlmi and yours tho is that i characterize xiao a little differently so it's like another typa exploration of lumine understanding him (and vice versa) altogether; he's a little no brained a little emotionless to his own self worth it's hard to feel things personally, likely an effect of his traumatic past changing him to lose autonomy and gaining it back. his emotions are a little muted and subdued that contrasts lumine's overflow of it but they both do have good control of them in general, so that's pree much the only large barrier they have that makes it a tad harder for them to understand in general. a strong xiao is good, protective and vigilant, but ppl miss the super essential fact he canonly states he trusts the traveler to stand their ground. that's where you see lumine is just as strong, people of the same wavelength and strength it just clicks easily (a bit complicated in mine, but their closeness is just the same,...) a fav personal hc detail i go crazy on brainrotting sometimes is there's the touch of desperation they had on each other and you put that very well in your fics, and like i said not too exaggerated- nor extreme that its realistic and human, very in-line with canon even.

and boy just OH BOY to merely focus their development on the simple, little things just like you described and to me it's truly like walking out to a quiet expanse after a heavy rain where everything in nature has a somber serenity of dewdrops and petrichor. it's a sign that's how xiao and lumine unconsciously heal each other through that understanding, the clashes they'd face and the warmth that closes in a resolute embrace.

[breaks down completely i dont got more words but my brain is xlmi speeding]

"like a pathetic peasant at the feet of a king blessing me" as though you are not the one who crowned me in the first place.......... we stand on equal ground my friend (deep ground) (the trenches) (fighting for our fucking lives hand in hand)

xiao and lumine. you are SO FUCKING REAL FOR THIS xiaolumi is cute i will continue to use it out of laziness as one does but man. at their core at their hearts. xiao and lumine, lumine and xiao. it feels like the difference between two halves coming together to make a whole and two matching wholes. separate but together.

"its not about protection its about Reaching Out" YES YES YES YES ohhh my god you could not be more real for this. the holding hands the closeness the warmth the security the little reminders of hey, im here, its okay, we're okay. STRONG FOR OTHERS BUT WEAK TO THEMSELVES........ explodes into a million pieces. and ur right i feel like a lot of dynamics sort of share that concept but with xiaolumi its Different bc they are my most specialist little guys ever its just. ITS DIFFERETN !!!!!!!!!!! <- like trust me

also that is so fucking fascinating like idk different interpretations nbd but i feel like Part Of That is us interpreting the way he'd react/respond to that trauma differently? which i fucking LOVE, because there's no right response to something like that anything is possible its just a matter of taking a look at where he is in the present and building something behind it that could have played a part in making him who he is. and there's so much we see of him but so much we dont, too, that leaves SO much wiggle room for characterization and i just. gmnmfnmgnmmfn. and i LOVE that so much, the sort of push and pull with his being muted where lumines overflow, that's SUCH a good dynamic dear LORD. the little steps to reach out to and understand one another the things they could learn and teach one another ohhhhh my god.

"there's the touch of desperation they had on each other" no bc this is SO IMPORTANT TO ME if i didnt include this just a little bit i think i would have exploded. and it cant be too much but it cant be too little, either, so im SO glad that it felt realistic to you !!!!

walking outside after heavy rain... the Stillness the Peace the fresh air that follows. taking a deep breath and feeling alive. god. GOD. i have done this so many times i LOVE the rain and i LOVE going on walks after it and especially after like the semi-heavier storms we get here and i know the exact feeling you mean and i cannot stress enough how wonderful it is to me that youd describe it that way. god. AND "how xiao and lumine unconsciously heal each other through that understanding" THISSSSSSS makes me insane i am biting through phone books i am punching the wall they are everything to me. Everything.

[thebendsbyradiohead]

I saw your tags in the friends post and I need you to know that meeting new people alone is not going to give you friends, you have to actively search for similar interests and do follow ups (messages/meet for something/hangout) without that's I hard to make friends, when you practice and learn what works more for you it should be easy!!

For me for example I dont really like texting, so I try to hangout at the very minimum 4 times a year with my older friends (just to keep in touch), for new friends once a month

i'm well aware that maintaining communication is how someone gets friends, the issue is that plenty of the people i meet at these events already have their friend groups & are not looking to expand them (especially if they're dutch, the dutch are chronically resistant to hanging out with someone other than their existing friends lol)

what additionally makes things difficult is hanging out costs money (not always, you can go to the park ig but with the weather being shitty here it's not always a given) & different ppl have different incomes. mine might be good to afford a 20 euro ticket to a museum but it's not everyone's. factor in the cost of travelling somewhere and back, especially if you don't live in the same city (and public transport here costs A LOT) & people are already unwilling to sacrifice so much to spend time with someone they met once

not to mention, it's a lottery tbh. i can find someone that has my interest sure, but then what if they don't have the same politics? i don't want to be friends with someone who's racist or transphobic. & vice versa, i may vibe with someone on opinions but then if we don't find anything to do in common it kinda stays there. also people are just straight up inconsiderate. when my friend of almost a decade was living in the NL i spent hours listening to her whine abt her ex bf & going to techno parties w her & keeping her company until 5 am but she couldn't bring herself to attend a singular poetry reading of mine, why should i expect someone else with no emotional attachment to me whatsoever to do it?

i know you probably meant this as encouraging and i appreciate it but i've been at this for a year and some change putting myself out there and overcoming all sorts of anxieties and not much has changed so i'm bitter lol

[struck-by-the-rain]

okayyyyyyyyyyy so my current thoughts:

idk im really tempted to say that gender isnt really a thing for their people. if there is any sort of gender in their world or whatever, it doesn't really matter. maybe they care more about what soccer team you support or what position you like to play on the pitch (like goalie/midfielder/whatever). as a sidenote it would be really funny if they had gendered pronouns but for soccer positions rather than gender (i dont wanna think about what worldbuilding stuff would acc lead up to them doing that tho lmfao!!!!)

they aren't completely unaware of earthling gender because I think their planet and earth has decent levels of contact, and space kickers visiting/living on earth/vice versa isn't uncommon! I imagine they see earthling gender as a bit of a curiosity and maybe wonder why they stress sm about it, and some get frustrated when earthlings try to assign them a gender in conversations/interactions while others don't really give a shit. As a side note, i think the same applies for most of the rh aliens.

^ idk i like that lore but i wanna reconcile it w my personal hcs for individual characters in my mind palace, especially ziggy!! because ive hced him to be transmasc (bc its cool + his voice ingame!) and gay?? but what do either of those labels mean to a guy who comes from a culture where gender isnt a thing like i think realistically they wouldnt really mean anything to them!!

buuut idk maybe as a compromise i could say that ziggy has had decent contact w earthlings/earthling gender throughout their life, and maybe tends to get read as female by clueless earthlings in passing? like maybe based on their voice, being purple/pink in colour, and the way they dress, ppl are just like "oh that's a GIRL alien"? ziggy sees that as kinda petty, so he goes by he/they and uses more masc-ish terms to describe himself to earthlings in spite of that??? and maybe other space kickers/rh aliens might do similar

like "i'm just ziggy, but if u wanna call me by one of your earthling genders i'd rather you'd see me as some sort of gay little dude-adjacent critter rather than make a judgement of me bc im purple"

i now rly wanna write a fic where joe and ziggy talk about gender or smth it would be fuuuub

i also wanna make shit up about space kicker gender but i dont knowwwwwww man,,, like a while back i wrote down a few lil gender/sexuality hcs for the 4 diff space kicker variants (which im interpreting as individual characters) but they were in terms of earthling/human gender? like ziggy (what i call the ourple 1) being transmasc nonbinary & gay and the nefarious anglerfish being a butch lesbian, but like,,, theyre aliens and gender for them is either completely different to humans or nonexistent so would they actually call themselves that??? so ughhhhhhhhh i dont knowwww?

it was originally gonna be something i just didnt think about bc like, i didnt feel like i wanted to do a bunch of worldbuilding about alien gender and culture and perhaps linguistics for the silly fluffy things i wanted to draw/write but now i kinda wanna think more about it?like i was gonna leave it like i put thought into joes experience w gender so i wanna contrast it w/ ziggy's? i also read a rly cool fic abt air batter gender and im inspired to write/think abt smth similar for my fav guys soooo idk

[kii2me2ii2]

How am I supposed to post badly photographes homestuck fanart when all that Im coming up with is bad

don't rb or probably read the tags either. ..

[will80sbyers]

I am not saying Ted is a good father either, what I am trying to say is that people mostly come up with overly angsty ways to portray it as if Ted is abusive and ragingly homophobic to Mike and Mike had no one at home to talk to bc of his shitty parents and he is abused and closed off and he had to raise himself for that reason and he has worse depression than Will etc etc that just.... aint it. Ppl can theorize whatever they want but they literally create new and nonexistent scenarios for Mike's character atp. It is like how they think Mike is more depressed and angsty than Will or that they attribute things to Mike's character that are not just true or supported in the narrative. Also being a reagen supporter isnt a good thing but that doesnt show that Ted is an abusive raging homophobe anyway. He is portrayed as an typical middle aged rich conservative man. Like i dont even think he would get angry if he learned Mike was non straight. That just isnt his character. I also dont think Mike feels uneasy to come out and i dont think he has that sort of drama or portrayal going on for his character. I truly think people just come up with nonexistent narratives which is setting yourself up for disappointment bc of the confusion of characterizations between Mike and Will's. If Byler happens Mike would be the proud one in the relationship because that is how his character is structured. It would be Will who would feel shy or uneasy because his character is the closed off one with actual IH and the way his sexuality is actually challenged in the narrative.

Bc of the way ppl confuse both of these characters' narratives they expect to see situations where Mike's character just angstly revelaed to be this dramatic character with an angst storyline narrative which his dark feelings, guilt, fear and shame etc are revealed by Vecna vice versa which just aint gonna happen because that is simply not Mike's character but is Will's.

I agree with this, just wanted to make clear that Ted is still a shitty parent, also I do think he's homophobic but in a casual way when they don't outright hate gay people but there is still ignorance and verbal dismissals... I am unsure on how Ted would react...

anyway

I really hope not many people will be too much disappointed if Mike is not how they imagined but at the end of the day other than making that post that I made the other day about being open to different possibilities I can't do much about that, and like I said, I think I'm correct but... me and even you could be missing something without realizing it... so like, live and let live and hope they will not start hating on the show if our predictions are true lmao

[stillqueerstillhere]

still thinking about yesterday ep of vice versa and trying to get my emotions/ideas in order, i really enjoyed the ep, but i am a little concerned about the next one because if im honest the ending felt like a good ending for the series? and the preview left me worried not just because they seen to be travelling between universes again (and i cant not deal with the chance of puentalay being separated again), but because one ep seems like too little time to build up a conflict and resolve in a way that honor puentalays journey (although i am very happy at the chance to see auo, up, job and the others again)

and i kept coming back to how easy it could have been to have this be the end for the series and it connects to what ive seen some ppl talking about the tesstun side of the story, which is true, theirs is also an interesting story and we need/want to know what happened between them

so i keep thinking how they couldve included tesstun + ended the series at the same place considering there is still one more ep and what i came up was:

- ep starts the same talay and tun talking and realizing only half managed to travel back and them cut to puen meeting tess thinking he is talay etc

- then we get intercut scenes of tun and tess explaining what the last two years were like with some actual scenes of ohmnanon + they reacting to their friends thinking they are together (we should at least get tun having to deal with that, like no only he got thrown into another universe with his asshole crush but now when he gets back his friends think he is dating said crush and they work together? thats too much to not be talked about)

- then we could have talay going back to the association and explaining to job what happened, this info could help other travellers right?

- then we can kept things as they went, talay at the beach cause i would change nothing about the masterpiece performance sea delivered + puen checking on tess and trying to go through his days while he waits for talay

- the ep could end with talay waking up in his bed and his mom calling for him

- then the last ep could focus fully on them getting back together and the conflict of their lifes being different here, talay gets back, cant get to puen, fixes the mess made of his life, they reunite at the glass house, we get some sweet domestic moments and even get into how puens fame affects their relationship

- i dont think they could fix all the challenges in one ep but they also wouldnt need to, it could have a sort of open ending where they are together and happy but are aware that things arent gonna be simple but they'll deal with whatever comes as a unit

anyways i know this isnt a perfect idea and i have confidence in the series to deliver a good ending, but i cant stop thinking about how different things could be if they used these two last ep to focus more on the effect of the travel on the characters' lives instead of adding another conflict

[silkgonerough]

Astro Observation/Rants #3 (includes moral support for ppl with harsh aspects between their big 3)

🍰UNDERRATED ASPECT COMBO: Mercury sextile venus + mars when I tell you the amount of crazy situations I’ve talked my way out of and the amount of free things I’ve talked my way into is simply ridiculous.. The mixture of both I think gives someone a rlly nice and sweet way of talking but with a certain tact and persuasion with how their saying it if that makes sense? Which equals a real charmer in words but also someone very skilled in how to get what they want through what their saying. If you have this as well start using it to your advantage trust me it works!!!

☹️Does anyone else who has Pluto or Saturn on or aspecting the ascendant in a harsh aspect have an intense self awareness that kind of keeps them from doing certain things bc it gets to much be too much or you get too paranoid over what others will think of you?

😪Being a Sagittarius but with Saturn as my dominant/elevated planet is really not what I signed up for... I thought I was getting my fun carefree casual storyline but Saturn said it’s the struggle for me. RIP to young me who only looked at cookbook astrology and rlly thought I was doing something...

🙃Ppl who have their sun or ascendant squaring your own ascendant usually have habits or just certain things they do that tend to annoy you or make you judgemental in how they present themselves to the world and others around them. My virgo rising squares my moms sagittarius sun and I can’t take her anywhere 😕

🥵Venus square mars is so hot yet such a disaster in synastry😭 like maybe it’s because I attract relationships that tend to be as messy as something out of a Netflix original but I’m always so attracted to guys who’s venus’ square my mars... and then they open their mouths😪

📚If you know someone with mercury in an aspect to saturn compliment their intellect, writting skills or just knowledge in general!! Ppl with this aspect tend to feel insecure with being considered “smart” even if they really are! Most ppl I’ve met are able to articulate their thoughts rlly well and are like walking dictionaries almost? They way they talk when explaining definitions or concepts is also lowkey hot🥵maybe that’s just my Virgo rising talking tho...

💖Sun in any aspect to venus but especially the conjunct/trine as an aspect between two people is the official hype man aspect!! The venus person hypes the hell out of the sun person and vice versa!! Probs the loyal fan who’s always in your comment section😘I love this aspect sm tho you just love the entire being of the other person! one of my fave celebrities has her venus conjunct my sun and I am deeply in love with her🤪

😩WHEN WILL THE UNIVERSE GIVE ME ANYTHING OTHER THEN A DAMN PISCES ARIES OR LIBRA MAN ITS GETTING OLD give me my Scorpio or Capricorn man😭🙏 (except dont bc all of hell will break loose and it’ll be me invigoratingly opening the gates)

🌗If you have your sun in a harsh aspect to your moon (square or opposite) your childhood was probably not the most fun in the home life and you probably understood the harsh reality of marriage or just unhealthy relationships in general from the parents :/ the whole sun/moon inner conflict was also probs pretty prevalent and caused social issues with peers at school.. honestly such a sad aspect to have as a child bc everything’s so hard and you don’t understand why bc you don’t rlly understand yourself yet :( but once you grow into it and figure out how to balance your emotions/moon to your overall personality/sun one can become the strength where the other is weak and it creates a sort of wondrous enigma of a person and ppl can become rlly entranced in your personality! It’s called layers bitch😜

🤫Scorpio/Pluto in the 3rd house (I have both🤗) could be someone who has a lot of secretive hobbies or interests that they don’t share with a lot of ppl but may have a secret social media accounts for them👀 not the type to tell ppl if they like someone but the ppl who are close to them will catch on or honestly figure out just by asking them straight up bc once confronted we get all embarrassed and you can see it on our faces super easily! We love our mysteries, plot twist or literally anything that requires digging deeper or making theories when reading or watching something. No surface level shit here🙅‍♀️

💸Mars in 2nd house may have a shopping addiction or may be bad at saving money. They usually binge shop and are the types that went to a grocery store for more untensils and came back with a waffle maker and a bunch of baking supplies😅 stingy if you eat their food without permission... the type to freak out if they left their fave shirt at their friends house after a sleepover lol, probs has a thing for food and sex together or sex in a really luxurious place with candles and rose petals.. it’s go big or I’m going tf home with them. Have furniture in ur home their not fucking in a god damn roller rink🤣

🌟People with Mercury in Aquarius/aspecting Uranus seem to really like talking about scientific theories or futuristic concepts!! All the ones I’ve known have had really grand ideas and seem to like anything related to the mystical but also seemingly holds a lot of innovative undertones! One of my friends who has Mercury in Aquarius aspecting Neptune/Uranus has a thing for the Disney short films which honestly is like a mix of neptune and uranus in its art forms! I’ve always thought it was cute how eager she is to show me them☺️

🌊From what I’ve observed an aspect that can make someone kind of bad at confrontation or like vocalizing their feelings until it’s too late and their bursting like a freaking geyser is Pisces mars. It doesn’t rlly take a lot to have them feeling some sort of way either with or without a valid reason (this is just an observation from the ones I’ve seen I don’t want to generalize!!) but the way they get angry is like a baby’s tempter tantrum and because I’m a Sagittarius I can always see thru the bullshit and I’m like is anyone else seeing this? I think overall besides Scorpio having a water mars signs is exceptionally hard so I cut them some slack but at what cost😫

🤤Mars conjunct Jupiter people are yummy. The men and women both are so hot and the men are always exuding big dick energy and usually thats what their giving👀

🌎All my big 3 create harsh aspects to one another (sun square moon, moon opposite ascendant, ascendant square sun) I honestly don’t know how I made it this far without literally exploding from tension but to anyone with these I guess my advice would be to refrain from taking things too personally bc it’s usually never that serious we’re just already a bit insecure in ourselves and how we present ourselves to the world! Your perception of how others view you vs how they actually do are usually very different in a good way but we tend to self sabotage ourselves into acting the way we think others want us to! I think having so many conflictive yet different sides of yourself creates a very influential character. It’s kind of like living in many completely different places throughout your life. The change is always hard and you don’t always feel secure but your experience and perception on things are really unique and you can offer other ppl a whole new perspective on who they are bc you yourself are always looking through the world through conflicting yet contrasting lenses.

[palmett-hoes]

per your post "every single one of the monsters is autistic and/or adhd" will you elaborate on that?, if you do i will love you forever (not that i wont if you dont do it)

oh boy i would love to!!! unironically nothing brings me more joy than writing long, convoluted character analysis posts

---

okay so i’ve written several posts before about why andrew is autistic. his moral code, the roundabout way he communicates, his body language, his stimulation-seeking behavior, his strict adherence to transactional deals, the emphasis on honesty, and a dozen other details. at this point i just take andrew being autistic as fact, not just an interpretation

h o w e v e r  i also hc that andrew is dyslexic, which is also a neurodiverse condition

- - -

similarly, i’ve seen more than one person interpret kevin as autistic, and i absolutely agree that it fits. not just the hyperfocus on exy but mostly the way he communicates. he’s very indirect, especially in his affection but very direct with his opinions. he tries to be helpful in a material way to the people he cares about, even if he comes off as negative. he wants the people he cares about to be safe and successful so he pushes them to work hard and reminds them in measurable ways how to stay healthy. he doesn’t factor in a lot of room for emotions, so instead he focuses on quantifiable things that he can improve. i personally act very similarly. approaching someone emotionally is hard for me, so when the people i care about have problems all i can think to do is try offering solutions, check up on their well-being, etc. practicality instead of conventional sentiment is extremely common with asd

- - -

so now let’s talk about neil. i had to think on this one for a WHILE but ultimately came to the conclusion that neil is adhd, probably hyperactive type. 

like obviously neil is high energy. i would say he probably does the most exercise of anyone on the team. morning run, morning practice, afternoon practice, night practice with kevin and andrew, plus he doesn’t have a car so he runs to class (on a BIG ass campus), and goes for an extra run when he feels stressed. that’s... insane, honestly.

neil reminds me SO MUCH of this post that goes:

“Was just informed by my mom that I do in fact have ADHD and the reason I thought I didn’t was because ever since I was seven whenever I got super energetic my mom would have me go chop wood so now when I’m feeling The ADHD I go chop wood”

(phenomenal post) and that’s neil to a t. tell me this isn’t exactly how neil handles his problems and also exactly what mary would have had to do to keep her unmedicated and very energetic son focused on the task of staying alive

neil also definitely has that ADHD on/off switch with his interest. the obvious being exy which is like the definition of a hyperfixation, but you can see it in other things: the way he runs totally hot or totally cold with people, his complete disinterest in his schoolwork, the way he can’t seem to sit still long enough to follow movies. but then there’s also the hyperfocus. doing the same drill for hours on end. watching exy game after exy game. staring at andrew until time falls away

what’s more, neil on many occasions shows racing thoughts, both in an anxiety way (and anxiety often goes hand-and-hand with adhd) but also as a way to quickly and accurately take in details about people to build a character profile of them. this is what allows him to connect with the foxes, how he manages to get through andrew’s puzzles, and even how he knows what to say in order to knock riko down a peg. his brain just works so fast and it takes in a lot of very specific details and disparate information to make connections.

but also like,, neil has a HUGE problem with time blindness. like the instant he didn’t have his mother around to manage and direct him anymore he lost all sense of time. he stayed in Millport for a YEAR. and what did he keep telling himself during that time? basically “i really need to move on, but not just yet.” for a YEAR! then he gets to palmetto and he’s like “i’ll cut and run in a month or two” then he doesn’t “i’ll be gone by halloween” wrong again “i’ll leave by the raven’s game” nope. like,, the boy just has NO sense of time and he can’t seem to make himself DO anything outside of an externally enforced schedule. and even then,,, HE HAD 48 FUCKING DAYS TO FIGURE OUT SOMETHING TO DO TO NOT GET MURDERED! 48 WHOLE DAYS. he didn’t make a plan, he didn’t write down any letters with goodbyes, he didn’t GO TO THE FBI LIKE HE’D INTENDED TO THE WHOLE TIME! nah he just made out with andrew and when he finally got to zero he was just like “ah shit, that was fast. oh well guess i’ll die” and that’s time blindness, babey!

---

let’s move on to nicky. 

now i think it would be really easy to say nicky is just adhd because he’s high energy and forgetful but tbh,, i don’t think that’s all of it. like if you really look at nicky’s character and especially at his problems, he has asd problems just as much as he has adhd problems.

so nicky is dual diagnosis asd and adhd. also nicky reminds me a lot of a girl i used to know who was autistic/adhd

so, adhd:

very generally speaking, ppl with adhd will struggle with sitting still, listening to and following instructions, planning/organization, following a schedule, and some social boundaries like “appropriate” times and topics of conversation

i would say you see hints of this with nicky. he’s definitely a rambunctious personality, constantly on the move, constantly stimulation seeking. he’s very tactile. he likes to dance, he likes to party, he complains about it but he’s an elite-level athlete. he’s also decidedly very chatty, and doesn’t seem to really pay attention to what he’s saying. he distracts himself and the people around him have to keep him on track. he has some trouble with boundaries. he’s a little all over the place. he’s almost a bit of an adhd stereotype

also one thing i find interesting is that when neil sees him in the library doing work neil is surprised to see he’s capable of that, especially bc when we see the upperclassmen doing work they generally do it in their dorms or on the bus and/or with other people around. that hyper-social nicky would be alone in a quiet place is weird. but this is like the most common tip for dealing with adhd. don’t do it in a familiar space. have a designated space and time to do work. limit distractions. just a lil detail

so now, asd:

in all honesty, most of nicky’s actual problems in the narrative could be viewed as stemming from asd symptoms. his number one issue being that he has a lot of trouble with nonverbal cues (and tbh, verbal ones too). the twins are mostly quiet. andrew especially (when he’s sober) communicates primarily nonverbally, and nicky seems to have a lot of trouble with this. despite knowing them for the longest on the team, nicky honestly seems to have the least insight into the way either of the twins actually thinks or processes things. he loves them, and he’s very forgiving of them, but he fundamentally doesn’t understand them. 

the twins, andrew especially, put up a LOT of nonverbal boundaries, and nicky sort of inadvertently keeps trampling all over them. he’s touchy in a way they don’t like. he talks a lot about their personal lives to other people. he treats them like they’re joking when they’re serious. etc. and like,,, you kind of get the sense that the upperclassmen feel similarly about him. beyond the homophobia, beyond the fact that he’s loyal to andrew, the upperclassmen still treat him with this sense of,, bafflement, i suppose? it’s clear that they don’t really understand him and he doesn’t really understand them. although, nicky IS curious about the upperclassmen, while the upperclassmen are pretty dismissive of him. it reminds me of when my sweet, floppy dog tries to play with my cat. their body language is different; they’re each receiving different signals than they believe they’re sending out

only,, nicky loves people!! he likes being around them, he likes talking to them. he’s interested in their lives and stories, but it’s very clear that he can’t read between the lines on people. he has an incredibly hard time with people who expect their actions to speak for them, which is most people, but is especially his cousins.

actually this is very much also an issue that i have: things need to be spelled out for me. the way i deal with it is i ask a lot of questions. ‘how do you want me to react to this potential situation?’ ‘what are specific things that make you most comfortable?’ ‘please explain to me exactly how you feel and what has prompted those feelings?’ and i’m always communicating vice versa like that with other people. a lot of specifics in both questions and answers

and the interesting thing is, when i was skimming through the books reviewing dialogue styles for another ask, i noticed that, actually, nicky DOES do this. with neil and the upperclassmen, nicky asks a LOT of quick, clarifying questions. things that ask after tone, that ask after intent. it’s kinda sad that he does this for communicating with acquaintances, but with the twins, the people he’s closest to, he makes a lot more assumptions. and i’m really proud of nicky for having this coping skill, because i can’t imagine it’s something he grew up doing. there’s no way he was raised in an environment that fostered this kind of open communication so it must have been something he learned about much later, probably in germany with the kloses, which would also explain why he’s a lil imperfect about it

---

now last but not least, aaron

this is another one i had to think through for a long time before it felt like it fit

much like how i felt that it would be easy to read nicky as simply adhd rather than also asd, i think it would be easy to say aaron is autistic simply because he is quieter, less rambunctious. however, i actually think he’s adhd, likely primarily inattentive type

in all honesty, aaron’s #1 character trait for the first two books is basically that he’s disconnected. detached. separated both from his family and his team. not in the same forcefully apathetic way that andrew is, more,, spaced out. he’s just kind,, there. not really paying attention to what’s going on, tuning in every once in a while only if something really catches his eye/ear then tuning right back out again. just sits in his corner and plays on his phone. and the thing is, from the moments when he does tune in, you can tell that he actually does care. he backs nicky when seth insults him in tfc, and we know he cares deeply about andrew even if he’s become disillusioned with their fraught relationship. he even hangs with his family, doesn’t seem to really try and slip away to other friends besides katelyn, he’s fine spending his leisure time with the monsters. so it’s not totally apathy, he’s just,,, tuned out most of the time

and, yea, that sounds like adhd. it’s not the type that most people are familiar with, and for a lot of people this causes it to slip under the radar. it can make it hard to get help or a dx because it doesn’t fit with how adhd “should” look or how someone “should” act, but difficulty focusing your thoughts and staying in tune with the current moment is absolutely part of adhd

addiction is also a huge problem for people with adhd. a lot of stimulants affect people with adhd very differently than neurotypicals, especially in small doses, and an adhd kid who’s struggled their whole lives with the disorder might try speed or god-forbid meth or fuck even coffee and suddenly find that things are a lot easier for them. they start to self-medicate, they don’t actually know what they’re doing, and then they’re addicted, and everything spirals out of control. we don’t know too many details about aaron’s addiction other than that his mother enabled him, but wouldn’t this fit? it’s also an explanation for aaron still taking drugs at eden’s, given that cracker dust seems to be a mild amphetamine. (aaron talk to betsy about the neurocog and get an actual prescription please)

(total throw away but aaron plays videogames and videogames are like,, adhd culture)

[menlove]

hey, i totally understand where ur coming from with that trans post, but i would just keep in mind multigender people, as well as systems that have alters that differ from the bodies agab! i know theres Usually a visible difference between these types of ppl but i think it would be best not to generalize if/when you dont know the full context. no hate and i dont disagree with you at all, i just see this kinda rhetoric a lot and it ends up with hurting people more than helping in lot of cases

I'm multigender myself and I totally get where you're coming from. but at the same time like.... alters aren't who I'm talking about but Even Then there's still gotta be some recognition that like..... an alter that might see themselves as a trans woman but is still in an afab body is Not going to have the same experiences as a trans woman. and vice versa. it's a similar (but not exact obviously bc gender and race are two very different things) conversation to what might happen if you develop an alter of color as a white person. I don't claim to have DID so I could be talking out of my ass but that's My Take on that situation. my view kinda boils down to Whatever gender feelings you have going on regardless of your neurotype, you kinda gotta acknowledge your material reality as well and not claim experiences that aren't yours. I've seen a lot of afab ppl that identify as trans women and a handful of amab people that identify as trans men and it's just super harmful esp if they aren't being clear.

and as a multigender person I both identify as a man and a woman but as I'm afab I'm not gonna call myself a trans woman even though I will sometimes share experiences w them (ie I've medically transitioned so now it's more dangerous for me to wear feminine things, sometimes. I get dysphoria from being called masc titles, etc, but I'm still not a Trans Woman bc they have very different lived experiences than I do and I couldn't ever understand what it's like to be them). like the best you can do is acknowledge your Gender Feelings and use it as an opportunity to empathize w similar groups but co-opting titles that don't exist for you that describe a class of person Less Privileged than you isn't the move. if that makes sense?