#and then still. every year without a doubt you will go back to the store or donate it to charity and be like 😖☝🏻 thank you! but uhhhhh

[kmgkmg]

HELLO MERRY CHRISTMAS - LEE SEOKMIN

word count: 2.1k…

pairing: seokmin x gn!reader

synopsis: a situationship with seokmin turned in to something more with the help of some mistletoe...

genre/s: fluff, non-idol!au, friends-to-lovers

warnings: suggestive and flirty but nothing actually happens.

rating: pg

a/n: long time since i wrote so i might be a bit rusty! this has been a v loose idea for the past year or so but inspiration hit so i wrote it tonight! the title is based off of hello merry christmas by gsoul! happy holidays :D

“I’m telling you, it needs more flour,” Seokmin whispers at a volume loud enough for you to hear. Despite the objections, his hands held the bowl in place sturdily while you fervently mixed the cookie batter.

You frown and momentarily stop mixing. “And I’m telling you, we’ve already added nearly twice the amount of flour than the recipe called for.”

Seokmin stops nagging, realizing he was probably the cause of your failed batch of cookies. Joshua’s birthday party is less than a day away and while you got your present for Joshua weeks ago, Seokmin’s present was as good as non-existent due to delayed shipping. So here the two of you were, baking sweets for your friend’s birthday as it snowed outside. “Is there anything I can do to help?”

You stop whisking, finally breaking your focus on the bowl. As you think of an answer for him, you can’t help looking at the sad creation in the bowl in front of you. “We should just scrap this Min…” 

He resists the urge to squeeze your shoulder. Well, if he had the choice he would hug you tight, telling you that your attempt to help was enough and never let go. Especially after seeing how cute you became every time you focused on something. But, he wanted to encourage you, not scare you off. Silence fills the room. Minus the occasional meows from your cat. Seokmin frowns as guilt creeps up since he knew you worked a full-day before offering to help him. You look up to him, curious of his unusual quietness.  

He snaps out of it, trying his best to not act like a complete fool from your sudden eye contact. “But you were so passionate about this recipe, Y/N!”

You nod, agreeing and suspecting nothing. It is true you wanted to try this recipe out. Your eyes drift to the clock: 6:47. “Can you go to the store and get some more chocolate chips? They say the third time’s a charm, right?”

Seokmin flashes a big smile your way before ruffling his hands in your hair. “Exactly! I will be right back.” 

Without even getting a chance to thank him, he’s put on his shoes and coat and ran out the door. You smile to yourself while throwing away the disastrous cookie dough. Despite practically being on death’s door when you came home, seeing him enter your apartment instantly made your fatigue fade. Determined to keep the first batch, you turn from the counter to look into the oven. 

After confirming their status, you double check the timer on your phone. Seeing the remaining time, you plop down on the couch. For the first time since eight this morning you were able to relax, not before noticing Seokmin’s scarf. You text him, worried about him turning cold. 

You have to get better at dressing warmly! Min, the easiest way to catch a cold is not dressing warm enough :(

Within seconds your text is read and he replies: The chocolate chips are in possession, checking out now. It’s crazy busy because of Christmas though.

That is not the main point, Lee Seokmin! 

Okay, how’s this: If I get sick, then you’ll just have to nurse me back to health  ;) 

You close the messages app, still processing his text. For safe measures,  you toss your phone to the opposite side of the sofa. You were still unable to deal with his flirting. No matter how many times you hang out, he somehow manages to leave you flustered. You reasoned that it was his personality and that he acted that way with everyone, but seeing him with your other friends made you doubt that conclusion. Sure, he is playful and lovable regardless of who he interacts with. But the flirty vibes that you picked up from him seemed to be exclusively directed at you. Then again, all your friends knew you were prone to getting ahead of yourself. You brushed off your thoughts, vowing to overthink less in the new year. 

Maybe calling Joshua to see his favorite cookie flavors would be productive. The phone rings a few times before you hear a familiar voice. “Joshua, hey, um, if you were to receive any food what would you want?”

Joshua chuckles, knowing your motive behind the question. “To be honest, I don’t like being gifted food. I can’t really mask if I hate the taste of something and I know how much effort goes into cooking, you know?”

You’re speechless, wanting to deny reality. All you can think about is the past almost two hours that you and Seokmin spent baking. “Yeah, totally!” You squeak out. 

“Didn’t you brag you got my gift like a month ago, though? What’s up with this last minute plan?” Joshua asks, his amusement evident in his voice. 

“Hey, my gift is killer, don't worry. Seokm-” Your hand flies to cover your mouth, shocked by your carelessness. 

“Seokmin? I didn’t realize the two of you talk like that.”

“I mean we hang out more these days…but he hangs out at your place all the time too, right?” 

“Hold on. Seokmin has turned down hanging out the last couple of times me, Seungkwan, and Mingyu have tried to get him to come out. We figured he wanted some time alone…so you’re telling me he’s at your place now?” 

You cover your mouth, realizing you shared something you shouldn’t have again. “He probably had reasons he canceled on you guys. He’s always talking about that time you all went to LA and stayed at your family’s house. You know, I um-I think my timer’s going to go off in a minute for this thing I’m waiting on and uh-”

“My bad, Y/N. I didn’t mean for this to turn into an interrogation. Seokmin usually doesn’t hide things so I guess I just wasn’t expecting the two of you to be so close.” 

“No no, you don’t need to apologize! After all, your birthday party is tomorrow. I wasn’t lying about my timer though, it has about three minutes left…”

“Uh huh. I know you said you got me a present, but you wanna know a better gift you can give me?”

You’re skeptical of where this was leading to. “What’s that?”

“The details of whatever the two of you have going on.” 

“Prepare to be disappointed. I mean there’s nothing going on besides me being delusional about everything he does and says.” 

Joshua laughs whole-heartedly. “I doubt that’s the case. See you tomorrow, Y/N.” 

You mutter a small ‘mhm’, before hanging up. 

“Time to check the cookies…” You trail off, talking to yourself.

Seokmin waits in line, tapping his foot anxiously as more time passes and you don’t reply to his text. Putting his phone away in his coat pocket, he decided to hum along to the music playing on the market’s overhead speakers. Spending Christmas night with each other means nothing. That’s what situationships do, right? As cheesy as it sounds, he liked you ever since you were in college together. The two of you took a literature course together and ever since, he was unable to get you out of his head. Your circles didn’t overlap much until Joshua befriended him in senior year and you showed up to a party that his house threw. He knew he was being foolish acting this way, when you never reciprocate his feelings. Anytime he mustered up the courage to flirt, you would change the subject. Shaking away his thoughts, he placed his item on the conveyor belt. 

Seokmin headed towards the store’s exit, already preparing to venture out into the snow once again. As he exited the store, an employee stood at the entrance. 

“Happy Holidays! We’re currently giving flowers to people who donate for the local animal shelter, would you be interested in donating today?”

His eyes scan the flowers, locking in on the roses sprinkled with glitter. As if hypnotized, he grabs money from his wallet before handing it to the employee. “The glitter roses, please.” Roses might be cliche, but they are classic for a reason. And being non-toxic to cats is a plus. 

He hypes himself up walking back, holding the flowers in one hand and the chocolate chips in the other. The store was not even a ten minute walk from your place. As he enters your apartment building, he takes deep breaths on the elevator. Finally, he opens your door. “Look what I found outside your door!” 

You crank your neck from your fixated gaze on the oven to try your best and see what Seokmin had in his hands. He scurried inside in a hurry and managed to be by your side in no time. He was towering over you, with his shoes and coat still on. The only thing that changed from the time he left is that now he’s completely covered in snow. Well that, and his cheeks and nose were cutely rosy red from being outside for so long. Before even getting to see what was in his hand, concern overcame you. 

“Wait, I didn’t realize it was a snowstorm outside! Oh my god. Hurry and take off your clothes, I’ll warm up some hot tea for you to drink!” You run to your tea collection and fill your electric kettle with water before hitting the start button. 

Seokmin breaks out into the largest smile humanly possible, making his cheeks hurt from it. He attempts to get your attention. “Y/N.”

You take the cookies out of the oven, placing them on the stovetop. Although Joshua would not be getting them, they were cooked to absolute perfection. Your attention shifts to the kettle which is now boiling. Opening the kitchen cabinet door next to the oven, you grab a mug for Seokmin. 

“Y/N?”

“You like goji tea, right? I remember you getting it when we went to that boba place a couple weeks back. Goji tea is full of vitamin C too, so it’ll help boost your immunity!”

Seokmin turns away and fakes a cough, trying to conceal his blushing face from you. Faking a cough was not a smart move though as you worry about him even more. 

You put the mug down next to the kettle and turn to him. Your hand moves on its own as you lightly turn his head to look at you. With your free hand, you place the back of your hand to his cheek, then to his forehead checking for a fever. 

He’s burning up, but it’s not the harsh weather outside to blame. 

“You’re so warm! Can you pour the water into the cup? The goji berries are already in there. You can add ginger for your throat too, let me go see if I have a hoodie for you-”

Seokmin puts the chocolate chips on the counter. He softly takes your hand away from his face and holds it. “Y/N.”

He shows you the roses, having your worry dissipate and turn into confusion. You tilt your head and finally look at him, breaking away from your auto mode. “What-? I mean, why?”

“Sorry to scare you. But I’m not sick, I just turn into a complete mess whenever I’m around you,” he confesses. 

He shyly hands you the flowers and you – still confused – look for a vase to put them into. As you take the flowers out of their wrapping, a familiar plant with white berries falls out. Mistletoe? You decide to be as bold as him, having the past couple of weeks play in your mind you realized you weren’t being delusional. This person in front of you liked you. He was practically screaming it.

You look back at him as he’s leaning his weight against the counter. You clear your throat before saying, “I’m glad I’m not the only one that can’t function properly…” 

Seokmin’s eyes dart up at yours, expecting you to be by the flowers. To his surprise you are awfully close to him, holding the mistletoe in between your heads. You lean in and kiss him to which he does the same, instantly warming up from your touch. He wraps one arm around your waist and cups your face with his other hand. The two of you enjoy the moment for a while more.

Separating from each other, he scratches the back of his head and asks, “Well, would you be okay with being the person I kiss under the mistletoe next year too?”

“What about the years after that?”

“We’ll see,” he shrugs, smiling and kissing you another time.

also here is the overall playlist for this fic! i feel it is very fitting for the szn and wanted to share it for those that would like to listen! happy holidays!

[messrsrarchives]

merry christmas to all those under the trans umbrella who have to unwrap merch soon and pretend to be greatful!!!!

AHAHHAHA yeah it's a CURSE isn't it???

last december my nan didn't get me any hp stuff out of pure fear of being wrong 😭 this year for MONTHS i've been getting screenshots of stuff from her and messages like "is this official?" "is this okay?" "robyn is this her?" and i'm like,,, nan. that is a tote bag from an independent stall in your local market. you have coffee with the woman that makes them twice a week. it doesnt even say harry potter. it just has a wolf on it. no,,, not it is not.

and then she'll go ENTIRELYYYY the other way and pull out wand photos and go "this?" and it's like NAN 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭 you're in a harry potter shop,,,, YES 😭😭😭😭 get OUT OF THERE

she's a lovely lil lady and she's trying her absolute best but something about her buying me pjs with stars on it from primark and asking if this is potential harry potter merch is SO funny to me.

like babe i am SO glad you listen to me talk about the silly little brothers named after stars but i assure you, she-who-must-not-be-named has not got IP over the star shape. it's okay. you're okay

asides from that, i've just told everyone else in my life that i don't want harry potter stuff which has led to a big kerfuffle of "what the fuck else does this guy like" and oh my. it never ends.

[lemonlover1110]

𝐂𝐡𝐚𝐧𝐠𝐞𝐬

Satoru Gojo

[Chapter 17] Father and Son

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Pairing: Satoru Gojo x f!Reader

Discord +18 - Twitter - Ko-Fi

Satoru tries to make up for the past four years of Ren’s life in a matter of weeks. His focus drastically changes, from his work to his son. He ignores the matter of so many people knowing before him, he avoids his mother and his so-called friends. His main and only priority is his son.

You both wish you could say that your relationship has gotten better, but you don’t really speak to each other unless it’s about the son you share. You’re hopeless that it’ll progress past what you have. Neither of you have the courage to bring up the situation, either way, your attention should be on Ren. 

Ren is finally meeting the man that he’s been dreaming of, and he’s getting to know his father after four years. You’re mostly excited for your son, while also regretting hiding it when you had the chance to tell him. Your relationship is the last thing on your mind– It’s certainly the last thing in Satoru’s mind.

He visits daily, bearing many gifts for his son. Satoru has become a regular at the toy store, buying something each day for his son, something that he thinks Ren would like. He hopes that material stuff will make up for the time wasted. Sometimes he brings some candy, but he doesn’t do it often. Satoru is still his father, he can’t just spoil him rotten, he also has to care for Ren’s wellbeing. He’s slowly growing accustomed to becoming a parent.

“What’s this, Ren?” Satoru holds up a cute white cat plush, one that Satoru always finds on the bed. He wonders if that’s the toy his son has had ever since he was a baby, he guesses it is since Satoru feels like he’s seen it in the background of a picture before.

“It’s whiskers.” Ren answers, taking the plush from his father and putting it back on the bed. That’s before he turns to other matters. Ren doesn’t mind sharing his toys (because you’ve been the one raising him), but whiskers is someone that Ren doesn’t like anyone touching. Anyone and anything can get the toy dirty, and when that happens, you refuse to let the toy on the bed, at least not before you wash it and get it clean again.

Satoru doesn’t bother to ask if that’s the plush that he sleeps with, because that’s most certainly a yes. Ren wants to talk about other important matters though so Satoru gives his undivided attention to his son. Ren then asks, “Are you sleeping over?”

“Uhm… No.” Satoru answers. You most certainly wouldn’t want that. Plus, Satoru has a wife at home who has her suspicions that something is going on. He doubts that she’ll care too much, but he wants to keep Ren protected from the world. If Sayo finds out, so does her family, and if her family knows, the whole world will know. “But I’ll stay until you fall asleep, Ren.”

“I want you to stay.” Ren sticks out his bottom lip, obviously disappointed that his father isn’t staying for the night. You let him on your bed all the time and you sleep together, why can’t he do the same thing with his father? Satoru can’t help but feel bad, so he thinks of how to respond to cheer him up.

You commented how you had plans of going on a small trip with Ren before summer ended, but summer evidently has come to an end. It’s colder now and the leaves are changing color. Satoru finally decides, “We can go on a trip soon, and we’ll be together all day every day.”

“Really?” The little boy’s eyes light up, making the biggest smile come to Satoru’s lips. Satoru now wonders how he was ever happy without him– Well, with you… But that memory slowly fades away since your relationship is now filled with awkwardness. Satoru nods his head in response. He can lie and make it a business trip, it’s not an issue for him really.

“We’ll have to talk to your mommy first, honey. Then we can plan it all.” Satoru answers, and Ren turns around to go look for you. Satoru feels awkward sitting alone on a bed that’s far too low and small for him. He stands up and follows Ren. They both look for you around the apartment until they land in your bedroom. The bathroom door is closed, and Ren immediately knows what to do.

Ren opens the door to the bathroom, and you immediately make eye contact with Satoru. Your face grows hot of embarrassment, and obviously Ren doesn’t see an issue with it. Ren’s issue is when he actually steps into the bathroom, and he just has to comment, “It stinks.”

“Yeah, I wonder why. Get out, Ren, and close the door!” You raise your voice, your embarrassment getting the best of you. Ren closes the door, leaving you to it, and Satoru chuckles. He ruffles Ren’s hair as both walk out of your bedroom.

“You gotta learn how to knock, baby. Give your mommy some privacy.” Satoru says, but it goes one ear out the other. Ren isn’t going to knock, you’re his mommy. If you want your privacy you better lock the door. They take a seat in the living room, where Ren grabs the remote to put on a movie. He knows how to get the movie he wants, even when he’s just learning how to read and spell.

“Where do you want to go?” Satoru asks, wondering where his son wants to go. Ren drops the remote on the couch, putting his tiny index finger on his chin, humming and tilting his head to the side as he thinks of the answer. 

“The beach.” Ren answers, but it’s cold. They can go out of the country though, go somewhere warm. He needs to talk to you first, of course. When you finally walk out of your bedroom (after mentally cursing your son for not having any manners when others are around), you go to the living room to see what they needed.

“What did you need, Ren?” You ask, and he looks excitedly at you. Satoru is the one that speaks up for him though,

“We want to go on a trip, can we?” You almost laugh since Satoru sounds like a hopeful child.

“Where are you two going?” You respond. You can’t really say no because Satoru is supposed to have equal authority as Ren’s father.

“Ren wants to go to the beach.” Satoru answers, Ren nodding in agreement. You cross your arms, your brows furrowing.

“It’s too cold to go to the beach, do you not have any other place in mind?” You point out, making Ren pout. The pout doesn’t last long though since Satoru says,

“We can go to another country. Somewhere warm with better beaches.” You’re certainly not convinced since you doubt you’re part of the plan. You’re not letting your baby boy in another country without you– Well, technically he’d be with his father, but you’re still not convinced. Until Satoru says, “Of course, you’re included! I doubt Ren would go anywhere without you.”

“I wouldn’t.” Ren affirms, and you laugh. 

“If you plan everything, then sure. We can go on a trip. You need to give me time off though– Paid time.” You say, and Satoru nods in response. He does pretty much everything you ask of him, and you certainly can’t complain about it. Ren focuses on putting on one of his favorite movies, and you begin to walk to the kitchen, asking, “Are you staying for dinner, Satoru?”

“Yeah.” Satoru answers. He’d definitely rather eat here with his son and you than dine alone at home. He helps Ren put the movie on, and they both begin to watch the movie. He’s watched this movie around five times the past week, and to be honest, Satoru is sick of it. But he’ll watch it because Ren loves it. 

He’s grateful when you call his name, and he has to tell Ren that you need him, so he can’t stay to watch the movie. Satoru walks to the kitchen, and he finds you trying to reach something that’s far too high for you. Satoru’s eyes land on the white bowl and he reaches for it before handing it to you. You mutter a thank you, and you expect him to go back to Ren, but he doesn’t. You then tell him, “That’s all I need from you, you can go.”

“Do you need help with anything else? You know I love Ren but… I’m sick of that movie.” Satoru answers, earning a chuckle from you. You think about what he can do for a moment, and he patiently waits for you to answer.

“You can make the salad, and then set the table.” You respond, and you think you’ll regret it for a moment. Satoru has had everything done for him, he probably doesn’t know how to cut a cucumber; but then you remember that he lived alone for some time, he had to cook for himself for a while. Satoru immediately gets to work, opening the fridge to get all the vegetables that he needs. He looks around the cabinets and drawers for the cutting board and knife, and he quietly begins to cut the vegetables.

“Have you talked to Shoko?” Satoru asks, washing the lettuce throughout. Pretty much everything is wrong between the two of you, but you can’t just stand in awkward silence every single day. You have to talk to each other, after all, you doubt you’ll stop seeing each other.

“I haven’t. I’m not going to for a while.” You reply. In Satoru’s eyes, she did nothing wrong. He’s glad that Shoko told him, otherwise, he probably wouldn’t be with Ren. But in a sense, he understands why you don’t want to talk to her. “Tell her to stop calling my phone because I’m not going to answer. I’ll call her when I’m ready.”

“I’m not really talking to her either.” He responds.

“Is it because she has the hots for your wife?” You blurt out, and you bite your tongue the moment the words leave your lips. Satoru’s brows raise, definitely surprised by your words. You can’t be serious, can you? Before he can ask more questions about it, you change the topic, “Speaking of… When are you going to tell Sayo about Ren? She’s your wife, she has to find out eventually.”

“Maybe after our trip… I’m not sure how to tell her.” Satoru shares, and you understand that it’s a tough situation. He has to figure out a way to tell his wife of almost five years that he had a kid that’s almost five– And he never cheated, he just found out about him. This was all before their marriage. It’s definitely hard. Satoru clears his throat, mustering up the courage to ask about Suguru, someone else that he has been ignoring. “So… How are you and Suguru? Are you still seeing each other?”

“We’ve been busy, but we’re still… Talking.” You answer. You won’t lie and say that you don’t feel nauseous every time you talk to him, your heart nearly beating out of your chest for the simple fact that you lied to him. He has to find out that you lied eventually. “Have you talked to him?”

“I’m not talking to him. I’ve been ignoring him. I’ve been ignoring everyone.” Satoru responds. He puts the knife down, watching you as you begin to cook. He bites down his lip, holding back on saying a couple of things that are on his mind. About this situation, about you and Suguru, maybe an apology. Satoru has been a complete mess with so many things going in his mind, but not voicing any of them. He does have to ask one question though, “Is Ren the reason why you quit school?”

“Yeah…” You feel embarrassed to say it. “I couldn’t afford both. It was either my baby or school, and that was an easy choice.”

“Sorry…” He mutters, and it’s barely audible but you hear it. You don’t really pay attention to it, in the end it was your decision. Given the option, you’d do it all over again. 

[sinstear]

ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤ 𝐋𝐀𝐖𝐘𝐄𝐑!𝐀𝐁𝐁𝐘 | 02.

ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤ PART ONE

꒰ ♡ ꒱ lawyer!abby doesn’t care how expensive something is, if she sees you looking at something for a little longer but refuses to pick it up or mention that you like it, she’s already making a mental note in her head to come and pick it up when you’ve wandered off into another store so she can buy it for you and gift it once the pair of you get back home.

꒰ ♡ ꒱ lawyer!abby gets a little agitated in the early hours of the morning when she’s trying to get ready for work, and she almost starts fighting with her tie because she simply can’t do it sometimes with how tired she feels. After all, she’s still trying to wake herself up. So she enjoys it when you stumble out of bed, grumbling and muttering under your breath before wrapping your hands around the expensive item and tugging it just slightly. “You’ve been a lawyer for 5 years, Abigail, you know how to tie a tie” she knows, but she just loves watching you do it.

꒰ ♡ ꒱ lawyer!abby loves─ won't openly admit it, but she loves it when she comes home to find you secretly, without her knowledge, trying on her suit jackets. There’s something about seeing you in nothing but your thin panties and a piece of her clothing that always has her brain in overdrive. 

꒰ ♡ ꒱ lawyer!abby wears her strap to any work event, especially when she knows you're gonna be her plus one. She's always risky with it, pressing herself into your back while she has her arm wrapped around your waist, the feeling of the bulge in her pants pressing right against your ass. “Been such a good girl for me tonight, gonna reward you so well, baby” she'd whisper quietly into your ear before excusing herself to join another conversation.

꒰ ♡ ꒱ lawyer!abby comes home exhausted most nights that she can barely take her clothes off because she simply doesn't have the energy to do anything else but slump herself onto the bed, watching silently as you walk around the room, telling her about your day while she's just staring at you.

꒰ ♡ ꒱ lawyer!abby who will have you riding her strap that same night, still in her suit while you’re completely naked above her. Lips wrapped around your nipple and her fingers rubbing circles on your clit. Drives her crazy when you start tugging on her tie, doing your best to pull it off and messily trying to unbutton her shirt. “can barely fuckin’ focus on that when i’m fucking you this dumb, huh?”

꒰ ♡ ꒱ lawyer!abby without a doubt will leave her credit card on the nightstand for you if she has to go away on a business trip for a few days. Abby doesn’t care how much you spend or where you spend it, as long as you're having fun and being safe.

꒰ ♡ ꒱ lawyer!abby who’s fucked you on the desk in her office on multiple occasions when she’s working late. Both of those time she missed dinner, being the girlfriend you are, brought it to her instead. You thought nothing of her sudden demeanour change once she ate, and you certainly didn’t mind when she had you perched on the top of her desk and face buried between your thighs for what felt like hours.

꒰ ♡ ꒱ lawyer!abby wakes you up with kisses against your shoulder and neck when you both have a day off. She can’t get over how warm you are in the mornings that all she can do is hold you tighter in her arms and give you every single kiss possible.

꒰ ♡ ꒱ lawyer!abby tells you she loves you every morning, even if you’re still asleep. Once more, before she leaves for work. She’ll call you on her lunch break just to let you know how much she loves and adores you. And finally, she will tell you just before you both fall asleep. It’s a lot, but you cherish every time.

꒰ ♡ ꒱ lawyer!abby spoils you rotten but loves you unconditionally.

[a-spes]

Hi I was rereading devious lies and I was thinking ab if nat and yn were to meet again and everything, yn would have the biggest trust issued ever. First her best friend took advantage of her and ruined her life, then the ones she considered family turned their backs on her without even letting her explain her side, and ofc how her lover shouted in her face that she's not welcome there anymore and how yn shouldn't even talk with her anymore ever. How the last time the team looked at her it was with anger and dissapointment That and also from the first part where she herself admitted to feeling like a stranger amongst her once friends and family.

Idk what you have in store for us for when you're feeling better and out of the writing block that you're currently experiencing, but I can't wait to read it. Take as long as you need, we're here!

˚ 　 ⋆ ⁺ ₊ ✦ ⁺ ₊ 　 ˚ 　. ˚ . 　 ☁ . 　　. 　 ˚ 　⁺ ₊ ⁺ ✦ 𝖙𝖍𝖊 𝖘𝖈𝖆𝖗𝖘 𝖎𝖓 𝖔𝖚𝖗 𝖍𝖊𝖆𝖗𝖙𝖘 ₊ . 　 ˚　. ✧ ⁺ ✦ ₊　 　 ☁ ˚　 . ⁺ ₊ ✧ ˚　 . 　  ˚　 ⁺ ₊ ˚

₊ ⁺ ✦ ₊　 　 ☁ 　˚　 . 　⁺ ₊ ✧ ˚　　 . 　  ˚ ˚ 　. ☁ ˚ 　. ˚ 　 ✩ ₊ ˚ . ☾ ⋆ ⁺ ₊ ✧   　　˚ ⁺

˚　 . ⤳ DEVIOUS LIES — Bonus part, 'the scars in our hearts' (6.280 words).

⋆ ⁺ ₊ ✧ ⤳ SUMMARY — Anon request — “ It has been years since the events, and when you eventually got the chance to go back with them, you thought everything would be the way it used to be. except it wasn't. three years, almost four, is a lot of time, and the people you used to know and the building you called your home do not feel the same anymore. Maybe you've been gone for too long to hope to find a place in their new life. ”

. ☁ ˚ ⤳ TAGS & WARNINGS — Natasha Romanoff x Reader, Avenger!Reader, Female!Reader, Other Avengers x Reader (brief mention of them). Bittersweet, (kind of) angst with comfort. Self-doubt, mental health issues, mention of bad coping mechanisms, toxic relations.

˚ . ⤳ MOODBOARD ⊱⋆⊰ MASTERLIST ⊱⋆⊰ TO SAY SOMETHING ✦ Part one. Part two. Part three. ⊱⋆⊰ the scars in our hearts.

˚ 　 ⋆ ⁺ ₊ ✦ ⁺ ₊ 　 ˚ 　. ˚ . 　 ☁ . 　　. 　 ˚ 　⁺ ⁺ ✦ ₊　 　 ☁ ˚　 . ⁺ ₊ ✧ ˚　 . 　  ˚　 ⁺ ₊

You’ve been told that you just needed a bit of time to adjust, because you come a long way, but they didn’t say how long ‘a bit of time’ was. So the months passed, they soon became years, and if you’ve still made no progress, you kept hoping. Every day, you repeat yourself that you only need ‘a bit more of time’ and that, soon, with just a little extra effort, everything will eventually be fine. 

Except that you’ve never been a patient person.

They made it sound easy. They made you believe that everything would go back to the way it used to be in weeks, and you’ve fallen for their sweet words because you were craving for them to be true. You have dreamed of that moment, and every day you’ve spent far from them was spent thinking about the day they would ask you to come back. It is a little fantasy you’ve been holding on to for the past few years, but the tears, hugs, and excuses you’ve spent hours to imagine never became a reality. No, you only got silent glances.

It has been almost three years since you came back, and it still wasn’t enough. Sometimes, you think about letting go of that dream of yours, the one that makes you believe that things could still get back to normal, even when nothing was —; but how could you do something like that? How could you possibly think about abandoning them again when they’ve been willing to give you a second chance? You weren’t ready yet to accept that the home you’ve been longing to return didn’t feel like it anymore, at least not without first trying your hardest to make things right. Thus you kept pushing yourself a bit more everyday, at the cost of your health — which seemed a very small price to pay in exchange for the feeling of being at home again.

Two years is not a lot of time in a human life but these years still felt like an eternity to you, and you’ve never been so aware of how long they have been as when you came back, realizing the gap that had opened up between you and the others. Your life has fallen apart that day, leaving you with such small pieces of yourself that you weren’t able to rebuild on your own —; but them? It is as if they’ve lost nothing. They’ve spent those two years building a life in which you’ve never existed, one that you are now supposed to find a place in. Every day is just a painful reminder of what you have lost, and will never get back despite your hopes. Your dream slipped away just when you touched it with your fingertips.

You have to accept that you are not a part of the system anymore, you are just the pebble that derails the machine, and that ruins everything —; but you should be used to it, shouldn’t you? To that feeling of shame and sorrow that your heart has been carrying for years, that feeling of failure and permanent disappointment.

Some nights, out of habit, you push the wrong door, and you find yourself in the room you used to share with Natasha. Once full of life, it had now become austere. Yet, there is something comforting about being in that room full of old memories, it is a bittersweet feeling that’s both like a heartbreak and a warm hug. You've never been much of a drinker, or at least you've always been careful enough not to get wasted. But you’ve made an exception tonight, because everything seemed to be too much, and you wouldn’t have survived the party if you hadn’t drowned everything in alcohol.

It is the way they kept laughing that got on your nerves, jealousy rising inside of you every time a new joke was told that you couldn’t understand “because you weren’t here” —; but Wanda wasn’t here either, and yet, she laughed along with them, why? Because she hasn’t lost her place with them, she is still a part of the family. They promised that they would tell their stories and explain their jokes later, because it was too long to do it now, but you were aware that it was just a lie to give you the impression that you weren’t on the sidelines.

It wasn’t very effective.

They spent the whole night telling stories that you couldn’t understand and sharing jokes you couldn’t laugh at, and while they remembered things that you didn’t have a chance to live by their side, giving you an overview of all the things you’ve missed, you were silently sitting on the couch, trying to ignore the knot in your throat. You didn’t even try to take part in the conversation —; what could you possibly have said anyway? You are not sure they would have wanted to hear about how miserable your life was when you were gone, how lonely and desperate you’ve been during these years. It would be an admission that you missed them, needed them.

Instead you kept your attention on the bottles of alcohol, at least they would never let you down —; that’s the advantage when the parties are organized by someone like Tony: you will never run out of booze. You were so uninvolved in what was going on around you, that you missed the worried glances that Natasha and Wanda shared, and they didn’t need to talk to understand each other, to know that they both had the same concerns.

Everyone does, but you’ve made it clear in your first few weeks back that you didn’t want their pity. There was no comfort in the way they looked at you and, quickly, their presence became too much. They were always there, never letting you completely alone despite the appearance and trying to meet your needs before you could even ask, pretending that they knew better than you do —; but they don’t. They have no idea of what you need, because how could they when you’re not even sure yourself?

The loneliness you’ve asked for isn’t more comforting, but at least it comes with familiar feelings, some that you’ve learned how to deal with the past few years. On the contrary, you still hadn’t gotten used to their presence, and you had no idea of how to deal with these contradictory feelings that were starting to grow inside of yourself. While a part of you wanted to lean in their embrace, the other rejected their overwhelming affection. A way of protecting yourself that won out, taking the form of uncontrolled anger and, after days of being yelled at and random objects being thrown at their faces, they’ve eventually got the hint that they should let you alone.

They’ve given up on you —; but that’s exactly what you wanted, isn’t it? 

You can’t be sure, but you are trying to convince yourself that it is better that way. You’re not worth the trouble, and they definitely can’t spend all their energy trying to save you when people are actually dying outside. You would be fine, you would get through it —; right? Because that’s what you’ve always done, and there is no reason that this time would be any different —; you are strong, with or without them by your side. You just need a little bit of time for your scars to heal and then, everything will be back the way it used to be. 

Except that, despite the appearances, those thoughts never really left your mind. Sometimes, you think about your return and what would have happened if they hadn’t found you that day —; maybe everything would have been easier. For you, sure, but also for them. You are not even sure they would have accepted your return if they had a choice —; you wouldn’t have. At least when you weren't there, there wasn't that constant tension that now reigned over the tower, one that followed you into every room you set foot in. 

So you’ve made a decision —; you would rebuild yourself without them. You would make a new name for yourself, a new life, even if it means leaving them behind. There is this growing will deep inside you, the one that feeds off your anger and jealousy, and it’s the one to get your revenge. You want them to suffer as much as you have, to realize what they’ve done, and regret every of their actions. You want them to crawl back at your feet, begging for your forgiveness because you are tired of being the only one to make efforts.

You have waited so long for them to say or do the right thing, but the moment has never come because they can’t possibly understand your situation, let alone knowing what you really need to get better —; how could they when you ignore it too? Nothing feels right anymore. You have tried a lot of things but nothing works. Your life is now like a jigsaw puzzle whose pieces refuse to fit together. There is no way to make things go back the way they were, you could only keep on pretending. 

And so you did, locking yourself into a routine. Each day you alternate between training, going on missions or attending meetings, leaving yourself little free time. This hectic schedule has the advantage of allowing you to avoid the presence of others and keeping you from thinking too much while making you more efficient —; it is perfect, isn’t it? It is, most of the time but, some days, the illusion falters, and the facade you’ve built shatters, revealing the truth you are trying to hide.

That’s how you found yourself stumbling into your old bedroom, the one that now smells of dust, desperate for some comfort and familiarity. You didn’t even make it to the bed, falling miserably asleep on the carpet —; you didn’t have the strength to get up when you tripped over your own feet, too drunk to take more than a few clumsy steps.

⊱ ★ ⊰

There is only one person in the team who is willing to give you the space you asked for without agreeing to give up on you yet —; and it is Natasha.

You may not notice it, but the woman has always been here for you since you came back to live with them. It must be said that her gestures are minute, almost imperceptible, but they always manage to draw a slight smile on your lips without you realizing it —; she was perfectly aware that if you knew it was from her, you would start hating on those little things that made your daily life at the tower a little sweeter.

She is the one who always accidentally cooks more food than she needed, making sure there was always a portion waiting for you in the fridge. She is the one who makes sure that your favorite cutlery is always clean. She is the one who buys your favorite flowers to put them in the common room’s vase and never lets them fester. She is the only one who has taken the time to make you feel at home with a bunch of details that are so insignificant that you’ve barely noticed them.

But at least it helped soothe the guilt her heart carried, because these actions are proof that she was fulfilling the promises she had made to you a long time ago, in the secrecy of the night, under a starry sky, whispered words that has been immediately blown away by the wind —; “I’ll always be there for you,” she had said. “Promise?” you’ve asked, your eyes full of hope. “Promise,” she had replied before your lips touched, sealing the contract.

One she broke years ago, when she dragged you out of the tower without letting you a chance to explain yourself. The woman is perfectly aware that flowers and some meals won’t be enough to earn your forgiveness, but she still made it her mission to look after you from afar —; because if she doesn’t, who would? You don’t let anyone get close to you, and the others haven’t looked any further, giving up at the first sign of trouble. She doesn’t blame you for not trusting her, or the other members of the team, she just wishes that you would accept at least one of their helping hands. 

But you’ve rejected everyone. 

Even Wanda, with whom you seemed, at one time, to be getting on well which had given the redhead hope. Those hopes had been shattered the day you violently pushed the witch away without any clear explanation, and the woman blames herself for that, for not knowing what to do in order to help you —; because she should know, right? That’s her role, the promise she had made years ago.

If she can’t, if no one can, what will you become?

You may be able to fool everyone, including yourself, into thinking that you are fine, but you won’t get her to fall for your little tricks. She knows the truth. She can see it in your fake smiles, she can read it in your tired eyes. She knows you by heart, she hasn’t forgotten those years spent by your side, and she has become a master at spotting your bad habits and the sublet signs that accompany them. 

So, tonight, she couldn't have possibly missed how firm your grip has been on the bottles of alcohol, nor how quiet you've been the whole time. But it is only when she saw the door to your old bedroom ajar that she understood the extent of your pain. You were hitting rock bottom, you would have never set foot in this room full of memories otherwise. She knew this because she, too, avoided it like the plague, and hadn’t dared return in it since that day, not even to empty it. For five years, it had remained the same.

The woman is willing to give you the space you asked for as long as you are taking care of yourself, it is the silent promise she made, but it is obvious that you have failed to do so lately as she has seen you slowly falling back into your old habits. The ones she thought you had left behind, the ones she had helped you to overcome years ago. She is ready to accept that you could build a life without her, it is a cost worth paying if it’s the one to your happiness, but you haven’t built anything lately. Nor have you been happy, and she couldn’t bear anymore the sight of you destroying yourself, again.

The redhead is tired of the situation. She is annoyed that everyone is playing your games by pretending that everything is fine because it only encourages you down this dangerous path, one that may cost your life one day. She is angry with anyone who takes the easy way out, because it is obvious that it is easier to act as if all that history belonged to the past rather than acknowledge their mistakes.

At first, she had agreed to play along, but it was only because she thought that it was what you needed and that, when you were ready, you would talk to them. Except that it has been a bit more than two years, almost three, since they brought you back, and you still haven’t told a word about it. The woman didn’t know how long she would be able to put up with your silence on this story and your obvious discomfort.

But it seems that the sight of you asleep on the dusty carpet of the room you once shared was the last straw for the woman who decided to step in. You are probably going to hate her tomorrow, but she doesn’t care —; she is not even sure you could possibly hate her more than you already do. She would rather know that you are safe, even if it means losing you a little more so she decides to call your name multiple times.

It is the sound of her voice who wakes you up. It doesn’t matter how deeply asleep you were because you can’t ignore her when she practically screams out your name, and you are inevitably roused from your slumber. When you opened your eyes, a growl escaping your lips to signal your displeasure, all you could see was a blurred figure with red hair that could only belong to one person. One you could recognize anywhere.

‘What are you doing?’ she asked, a mixture of annoyance and concern tinged her voice, but you weren’t aware enough of your surroundings to notice it. Maybe if your hand hadn’t been so heavy on the alcohol, then you would have noticed the tone of her voice.

‘I am sleeping, can’t you see?’ you grumbled, but as soon as the words escaped your mouth, the frustration was replaced by a laugh —; this question was stupid, you realize. Isn’t she supposed to be a trained spy, and one of the best, too? Then why couldn’t she see what was right in front of her? Something that obvious? 

Maybe she doesn’t know either because your question is followed by silence. Her only answer has been to sigh and pinch the bridge of her nose. It was going to be a long night, she already knew it, but wasn’t sure she had the energy to deal with that.

‘Come here,’ you said when the woman didn’t react. Your words were accompanied by the gesture of grabbing her arm in order to pull her toward you, the woman losing her balance because of the surprise. 

Since she had found you, you had never asked for her presence. On the contrary, you had rejected and hated her. At best, you would tolerate her presence, but only when your job didn’t give you a choice, and so this sudden change in your behavior disconcerted her, especially the laugh that escaped your lips when she fell on top of you —; it is a sound that she has never thought she would hear again. So pure, so sincere.

‘Get up,’ she coldly says, not amused at all by your little games. If circumstances had been different, she probably would have found your attitude endearing and stayed a little longer in your arms. Except there was nothing healthy about this sudden closeness after months of hatred, so the woman immediately got up, inviting — ordering — you to do the same —; the sooner she puts you to bed, the sooner she can get back to hers.

Tonight, she had no patience. The woman was exhausted, and frustrated —; you weren’t the only one to suffer from the situation. She knows that your clinging state is just an illusion, the result of the alcohol you’ve ingested, and that the very next day you’re going to hate her again. If she wanted nothing more than to believe everything would be okay now, and to find comfort in your arms, she couldn’t bring herself to do it. Not when she knew she would lose it all again at sunrise. This scene is only a chimera, a reminder of what she had lost several years earlier as the result of her own actions.

If anything happens tonight, you would both regret it. Nothing can come from the actions of two tipsy and exhausted people. Except that your mind wasn’t clear enough to realize it, and all you could think about in that moment was how you were craving for Natasha’s attention. You wanted her to wrap her arms around you and whisper that everything will be fine now, because she is here. You wanted her to promise to never let you down, again. Even if it is a lie. Even if, one day, she will abandon you again —; because that’s what they all do despite the promises, isn’t it? At that moment, you didn’t care about the lies, you just wanted something to hold onto, just an ounce of comfort.

‘I caaaaaan’t,’ you whined, but you didn’t even try to do so. When you stretch out your arms towards the redhead, she gets the hint that you’re expecting her to help you, which she does. The woman knows how stubborn you can be so she grabs your hands and pulls you on your feet, sighing.

Except that you seem to find the idea of testing the limits of her kindness particularly amusing because you make no effort to pull yourself upright, or to stand on your feet —; or maybe you were just that wasted. You’re barely standing when you fall forward, leaving no choice to the woman who has to catch you before you hit the ground.

‘Got you,’ you whispered, a grin on your face, when you felt her arms around your waist.

The thought of dropping you crossed her mind, but all she did was to playfully roll her eyes. The woman should be annoyed by the situation —; right? But how could she when you are so adorable? It has been a long time since she last saw such a peaceful expression on your face. Your eyes were half closed, you looked as if you were about to fall asleep in her arms, and there was a faint smile on your lips. You seemed so content, nestled in her arms with your cheek pressed against her chest, that she hardly dared to move, fearing to break this well-deserved moment of peace. For a moment, it was as if nothing had happened, and the sorrow on your face had dissipated, giving way to a childlike insouciance —; a sight that made her heart melt.

You are the one who broke the silence first.

‘I’ve missed you..,’ you whispered. A confession so unexpected that the woman is not sure if she had understood your words. When her eyes looked down, searching for yours, you hadn’t moved, your eyes still closed. It was almost as if you hadn’t spoken, and that the words had been nothing more than a figment of her imagination. 

‘Me too,’ she softly replied and, maybe, if you had opened your eyes at that moment, you would have noticed the tears that clouded hers — but you couldn’t do that, because you don’t want her to see the tears that you are trying to hold back, right? The one that would just run down your cheeks the moment you open your eyes. 

‘Please, stay with me tonight,’ you asked —; no, you begged. You’ve lifted your head until your eyes finally meet hers, both were shining with the tears that threatened to fall —; you are the first one to give in.

The mere thought of Natasha leaving you was enough to shatter your last ramparts. You have just regained her embrace, you don’t want to be forced to leave her now, not after so many years of hoping to regain the comfort you thought you had lost forever. You have been too stubborn to admit that you needed help, and so you’ve spent years pushing everyone away, thinking that you didn’t deserve their affection. It has been so long that you can’t even remember the last time someone held you this way, with such delicacy and care.

It gave you hope. The one that, maybe, for at least one night, things could be the way they used to be —; just tonight, or even just a few hours. You just want that moment to last a little longer, you don’t want to spend another night alone in your bed, in your cold and austere bedroom with a depressing atmosphere. You want more than that, you want a reason to stay, a reason to try again, and to get up tomorrow —; you want Natasha back. You want your old life back.

Except that the woman won’t give in. It is not that she doesn’t want to, on the contrary, she shares the same wishes that you, but her mind is clear, and she knows that nothing good would come out of it —; you can’t get back to what you used to have. You can’t change the past, nor can you pretend it doesn’t exist.

‘I can’t..,’ she softly replied after a second of silence that marked her hesitation, ‘you know that baby, we both,’ she added, the nickname naturally escaping her lips when she noticed that more tears were threatening to fall from your eyes. 

She wants to say yes, you can read it in her eyes, hear it in her silences —; then why doesn’t she say it? Why does she keep pushing you away when you are eventually ready for her to be back? Isn’t what she has wanted when she spent all those months begging you to accept her help? It is, but she didn’t want it that way, she didn’t want to take advantage of a moment of weakness on your part. She wanted to earn your forgiveness, to show you that you could trust her again, and if she had to work every day until she dies to achieve that goal, then she would do it. 

‘Why not?’ you immediately asked back, ‘you are here, and so am I, and- and our bed is waiting for us,’ you started rambling. You couldn’t speak clearly, the words racing through your head as you tried to convince her, but you knew it was a losing battle. You were so desperate that your hands clung tightly to the fabric of her shirt, as if it could be enough to stop her from leaving. ‘Please,’ you begged once more when she didn’t react. At this point, your voice was nothing more than a broken whisper, ‘just for tonight, we could pre~’ 

‘Pretend that nothing has happened?’ she softly asked, finishing your sentence, and all you could do was nodding. ‘But you know we can’t do that baby,’ she said, hating the way you were looking at her with so much hope, as if you thought that one night in her arms could ease all your problems —; but it can’t. It won’t. 

As she talks, one of her hands tucks a lock of your hair behind your ears. The touch is so gentle that you can resist, and lean into her embrace. The feeling of her hand caressing your head leaves too soon for your liking. 

‘Sometimes, I wish that we could,’ you replied, ‘that I could either forget everything, or go back in time to make everything right,’ you confided in her, sharing your thoughts with someone for the first time.

The words have barely crossed the barrier of your lips that you crumble, because you realize that this wish will never come true. You can no longer hold back your tears, you can only hide your face in the hollow of her neck, hoping she won’t see those. Only, each of your sobs shakes your body so violently that anyone could understand your state in one glance. The woman doesn’t know what to do so she cautiously wraps her arms around you and cradles your body in an attempt to sooth your sobs —; it’s the least she can do.

‘You’ve done nothing wrong, love, nothing was your fault,’ she whispered, and you can hear that her voice is feverish —; she, too, is holding back tears. She can’t bear to see you like this. ‘I am sorry, so sorry,’ she added while she rocks you slowly. Those words weren’t for tonight, and how she had to refuse your proposal, but they were for everything that has happened since that day. Those excuses were for all the things she has done or said since but, most importantly, for all the things she didn’t have the courage to do and the ones she couldn’t. 

⊱ ★ ⊰

The following morning, you’re woken up by Jarvis, his voice echoing through the room, terribly loud and impossible to ignore. A grunt escapes your lips, you were hoping for a few more hours of sleep —; or best, for an eternal slumber. The night before, like the rest of the team, you went to bed late, and the quantities of alcohol ingested are definitely not helping with your condition because you were the victim of a terrible headache. Only, it is impossible for you to ignore Jarvis’ voice. He has been calling your name over and over again for several minutes now, trying to get the attention you are trying to not give him —; but even with your hands covering your ears, his voice would pierces your eardrums.

‘You are not answering me, miss y/n,’ he stated the obvious, ‘do you want me to warn the others that you are sick? My sensors indicate tha~’

‘Please, Jarvis, shut up,’ you mumble, still managing to be polite despite the rising frustration, and you really hope it will be enough for him to leave you alone —; but anyone who knows the AI knows that these hopes are in vain. 

Nonetheless, you have to admit that he is right about one thing: you are not feeling so good —; but who would after attending one of Stark’s parties? He always says that if your head is not sore and your throat is not burning the next day, then you haven’t enjoyed yourself enough. Surely you have enjoyed enough to last a lifetime, although you are not naive enough to swear to never touch a bottle again in your life. Yet, you’ve thought of it for an instant, the lingering nausea making you regret your actions because it gave you the unpleasant feeling that you might throw up at any time.

God, you were weak. So weak that everything was feeling too much right now, even the faint sunlight making its way into your room —; it makes you want to bury yourself alive to avoid all these sensations, and to die. Except you can’t because you have a mission that is scheduled for today and, if you don’t show up soon, they will come looking for you, which is the last thing you want. You have spent weeks preparing for that, you definitely can’t let them down now, especially not because you are just too stupid to know your limits.

You have abandoned them once, you won’t make the same mistake a second time. They won’t be so forgiving this time, no one forgives someone who does the same mistake twice —; no one gives a second chance to traitors. It has been several years since you came back, but you still feel like you are on probation and you need to prove to them that they can count on you. You can sense their hesitation to trust you, even though they insist that everything is fine —; pretending that everything is the way it used to be. It is their new favorite game, but you hate it. Y

et, you don’t have much choice but to play by their rules.

‘Are you sure? Becaus~’ 

‘I said, shut. the. fuck. UP!’ you yelled, not giving him to finish his sentence, already reaching the limits of your patience, ‘what’s so difficult to understand in those two words?’ you growled in frustration, and you can’t help but throw a pillow at the walls. The gesture is useless because it doesn’t even manage to ease the tension you feel, nor does it convince Jarvis that he needs to stop talking because he starts lecturing you about your actions. 

Actually, the only way you have found to shut him up was to get up and join the others for breakfast. Fortunately, only Tony and Steve were there. They are the ones you are going on mission with today, and that’s what they were talking about before you entered the room.  Even though you would rather stay alone, talking about missions is something you can do with little effort because it is easy. You need your brain, but you can turn off your emotions. You do not have to worry about saying the wrong thing or how to avoid an uncomfortable silence. It is familiar, and comforting. It has been a while since you've been sitting at this table talking about something else —; when you are not talking about work, you stay silent. It seems that you have forgotten how to interact with them during those years. 

As they go through the details of the mission one last time, you are playing with your breakfast, not interested in the oat flakes floating in your milk, nor in their voices that forms a dull hum in the background, their words not even reaching your ears —; because you are thinking, your eyebrows furrowed with worry. Except that your state isn’t caused by the reasons they think it is, neither the alcohol nor the mission are in your mind, only a certain spy with whom you shared a moment last night. One you would rather forget because the simple thought of the thing you have said, and done, is enough to fill you with rage and embarrassment.

‘Hi to the moon, here the earth,’ Tony said, snapping his fingers in front of your face to get your attention, ‘were you even listening to us?’ he sighed, but you don’t notice any annoyance in his voice. Only a sickening worry that you can read in his eyes, a feeling that he doesn’t share and doesn’t hide very well. You hate it, when they look at you that way, as if you could break at any moment, as if they needed to be careful —; but you can take it. You can take everything, and you definitely do not need their permanent protection. 

‘No, sorry, I was lost in my thoughts,’ you admitted, giving him a smile that I hoped to be convincing enough to reassure him.

‘Do not worry, everything is going to be fine, okay? We will be here to make sure of that,’ Steve intervened, trying to reassure you about what he thought was the cause of your worries, but his tone didn’t feel comforting to you. If anything, it made you grit your teeth and clench your hand harder around your spoon, increasing your irritation. You don’t really know why, but Steve has been the hardest to get along with since you have come back, maybe it is because of his seemingly false sympathy. 

‘Thank you,’ you managed to mumble, even though you don’t really mean it —; it was still better than the snide comment that made its way in your mind. You even made the effort to smile, one that anyone could see as fake, but not Steve, because he never really pays attention to the others.

The words burn on the tip of your tongue, and you have to bite it to not shout out to him what you are really thinking. You want nothing more than to tell him that you are as capable as anyone around this table. You have proven yourself over the last few months, succeeding in every mission they have given you, what more do you need to do for them to have faith in your abilities again? Reach for the moon? Because you are ready to do it if that’s the price to pay. You are desperate enough to do anything they would ask. 

In reality, you are not worried at all about the upcoming mission because that is not a possibility. You don’t fail, ever, and if you need to give pieces of yourself and mind in order to complete a mission, then you are ready to do it without flinching. 

No, your thoughts were occupied by something else —; or someone else. Something that was more difficult to manage because there is no guide to follow. This person is Natasha, and the cause of your worries is the moment you shared last night because you have no explanation for what happened —; you thought she hated you, and that you hated her. Aren’t you both supposed to despise each other for the pain you’ve caused? Then why do some of you still yearn for her presence? Why didn’t she reject you and, instead, decided to take care of your mess? This even wasn’t meant to be. The redhead is the last person that should have witnessed you in such a vulnerable state, and yet she is the one you have sought attention from, the only one you needed last night —; and you hate that. You hate how your feelings are still the same even after so many years.

That is exactly why, the second the woman that is haunting your thoughts stepped in the room, you left it, pretending that you needed to get ready for the mission. There is no way that the way you walked out of the room, leaving your untouched breakfast behind you, didn’t bring questions to their minds but you were long gone before any of them could say something.

˚ 　 ⋆ ⁺ ₊ ✦ ⁺ ₊ 　 ˚ 　. ˚ . 　 ☁ . 　　. 　 ˚ 　⁺ ⁺ ✦ ₊　 　 ☁ ˚　 . ⁺ ₊ ✧ ˚　 . 　  ˚　 ⁺ ₊

˚ . ⤳ MOODBOARD ⊱⋆⊰ MASTERLIST ⊱⋆⊰ TO SAY SOMETHING ✦ Part one. Part two. Part three. ⊱⋆⊰ the scars in our hearts.

. ☁ ˚ ⤳ TAG LIST — @cd-4848, @chocolatestrawberrykryptonite, @escapereality4music, @fxckmiup, @gemz5, @jusnough, @m0nsterqzzz, @marvelwomenarehot0, @mrsrushman, @riyaexee, @takeyaki, @taliiiaasteria.

[vincentbriggs]

@once-a-polecat replied to your post “My uncle's friend asked if I wanted this machine...”:

So do Whites have the same parts availability as Singers? I see them around for a fraction of the price, I’ve just been holding out for a Singer because the parts are relatively easy to source. I’ve seen some really lovely White machines tho! I bet yours is going to look stunning when it’s cleaned up. That cabinet is {chefs kiss}

​I don't know, I haven't looked into it because mine's not missing any pieces and still has all 6 bobbins.

I think that as long as you can verify that it has all the parts, and at least one or two bobbins, it probably won't need any new ones.. ever? The little rubber ring on the bobbin winder and the treadle drive belt degrade after a few decades and need replacing, but you can easily buy those, and everything else is highly unlikely to break from regular use.

The one thing I was worried about was accidentally stripping the screws while taking it apart for cleaning, and there was one screw that I didn't quite have the right size of screwdriver for and it started to look a bit ehhhh so I just didn't take that part off. It wasn't one of the really gunky ones anyways, and I did my best to clean around it, and may try again someday if I get more sizes of screwdriver. So I'd advise making sure you have all the right tools before starting and slathering all the stuck bits well in kroil (what the guy in a video I watched yesterday used) or wd-40 (what I used) or some such loosening thing.

It seems like it's very hard to find new bobbins, especially since there are different styles of shuttle and the bobbins are not interchangeable. Mine's a boat style and my bobbins wouldn't work in a bullet style from a couple years later.

While cleaning this thing it hasn't even crossed my mind to wonder where I'd find replacement parts because, well, what could possibly break? Nearly every single piece is cast iron or steel, and it's already been used SO much that the decals on the bottom are almost completely gone just from the amount of fabric that's run over it.

As mentioned in the previous post it's about 140 years old, was owned by a woman who made her living sewing on it for many decades, and it still works just fine! I haven't got the bobbin winder cleaned up yet and it's still off the cabinet, but I couldn't resist trying it out with just the hand wheel (using one of the bobbins that was wound long before I was born) once I got all the bits back on and yeah! Perfect stitches right away!

As long as it's kept well oiled it's just gonna keep on chugging along indefinitely.

Are you seeing these White machines in person at secondhand stores and such? If you can check to make sure they have bobbins and that no pieces are missing, I'd say grab one! Maybe keep some reference pics of working ones so you can look and see, or even better see if you can make a stitch with it before buying it, and presumably if it can do that even slowly and gunkily then it'll just need cleaning like this one did.

By all accounts they're REALLY good machines! I'm super excited to try mine out properly, and to post more about all the features. It has a lip around the bottom of the needle bar so that if some oil drips down it won't get on your needle! Genius!! Why doesn't every machine ever have that?! It's also fairly quiet AND you can adjust the bobbin tension right in the middle of a seam without disturbing the sewing or taking the shuttle out. Incredible.

The manual for mine says "The Best in the World" on it, and while that's just a normal Victorian thing to say about a product, I'm not about to argue with them. There are a few little things that I like better on Singers, such as the quality of the hinges that hold the machine to the cabinet, and the way the presser foot attaches, but all in all this White VSII is extremely goddamn good so far and I have no doubt that once I get the bobbin winder cleaned up it'll also work perfectly!

So yeah, GET ONE!

[authorhjk1]

Idol Competition

IU X Kang Seulgi

IU sits on the couch in her apartment, her phone in her hand. It's 9:55 am on a Monday. The fourth of December to be exact.

Five more minutes. She has five more minutes until her deadline. IU wonders if she is able to still pull it off. It's quite cold outside, so she expected her to not go through with it. But the other woman sounded more than confident.

Lee Ji-eun checks the chat history on her KakaoTalk app. No picture to proof her accomplished mission yet. IU smirks. Four minutes left.

Is this it? Is this going to be the moment she wins this competition? It has been going on for months now. The two women come up with new challenges almost every day.

Kang Seulgi had two days for this one. IU sees the six turn into a seven. Three more minutes. Even if she could do it in the cold, she would still need to find someone to do it with her. IU wonders who could be crazy enough.

But then again, it's Seulgi. She is a famous woman. And really pretty. There is no doubt that someone would say yes.

Two more minutes.

IU is already thinking about the prize. Although you could say that every mission was a prize itself already.

Her phone vibrates and Ji-eun sighs in disappointment. She clicks on the picture Kang Seulgi send her just now.

The younger woman is kneeling on a blanket. It's visibility windy, her hair flying in all directions behind her. The waves of the ocean are captured on the left side of the picture.

It could have been a normal picture of a woman on a beach. Except for the fact that Seulgi is completely naked. And that it looks like she just good a facial.

IU zooms in on her face. She licks her lips as she sees how well someone came on her competitor's face.

Seulgi is smiling into the camera, hands behind her back, pushing her tits a little forward.

"How often did you get caught?"

IU bites one of her nails as she sees the notification that Seulgi is typing a response.

"Twice. The second guy even stayed and watched while I got my face fucked."

IU moans at the thought. She remembers the challenge from two weeks ago.

Seulgi made her go shopping without her credit card. When she wanted to buy something, she had to convince the seller with something else. It didn't matter if it was a man or a woman, IU did her best to buy as much as she could. In the end, she got caught by a young couple in the isle of some store, her face a mess while the seller was abusing her throat.

"Was it very cold?"

"It was alright. Sex makes you warm real quick."

IU chuckles at Seulgi's message.

"Do you already have something in mind for me? Or do I need to wait?"

Ji-eun's eyes widen when she sees Seulgi's next text.

"Go to SSHS."

That's Seoul Science High School.

"Find a student who is younger than 20 and give him the best school day of his life."

IU can't help but let her hand slide underneath her shorts. Being over thirty years old already, she recently discovered that this is somewhat a new kink of hers. Younger guys who are almost half her age. Legal of course, but young. This could be her chance to freely enjoy this kink of hers.

"Deal."

"You've only today. Should be a piece of cake for a slut like you."

"I love you too."

IU teases her back, before getting off the couch. What to wear for her visit to high school?

Ji-eun walks towards her closet. Should she dress up as a teacher? Or a student?

She can feel how wet these thoughts make her pussy. The idea of letting some young man fuck her, forces IU to move her hand back into her shorts. She let's herself sink into her bed, while looking at the opened closet. Her head falls back as she starts to finger herself.

IU nervously looks around, before reaching inside the bookshelf. Now that she is here, she is way more cautious. It was surprisingly easy to get inside the school building, considering that strangers are not allowed.

Wearing her mask, Ji-eun was able to pass as a teacher while walking through the hallways. She is now standing in the library. The perfect place for her challenge in her opinion.

Now that she has placed her phone inside the bookshelf to record the proof, she is looking around to find the right guy.

"Ms. Lee?"

IU turns around on instinct, her heart sinking. Did she actually get caught already?

"I apologize. I thought you were our homeroom teacher."

The young girl apologizes. She doesn't seem to recognize her. IU takes a deep breath, relieved that she is fine.

"It's alright. Can I help you anyways?"

She tries to act natural, hoping the girl won't catch on.

"Yeah. Me and my boyfriend are looking for the right textbooks for our research. I'm not old enough and he lost his library card. We wanted to ask Ms. Lee for help."

Ji-eun nods. Does that mean her boyfriend is at least eighteen? She knows you have to be over eighteen to borrow specific books from the library.

"I'm sorry, I can't help you with that. You better ask Ms. Lee."

"Thanks, teacher."

The young girl bows and walks towards a table. A guy, who seems to be her boyfriend, is waiting for her there.

IU can't help but bite her lip. The first guy she finds looks quite handsome as well. She doubts he could resist her. After all, relationships in high school aren't serious anyways.

She watches the girl leave the library, before walking over.

As expected, it only takes a couple of words, before IU takes the boy's hand and leads him towards the bookshelf. He just turned eighteen four months ago. Just the right age to fulfill this fantasy.

She can feel his stare on her legs as she walks in front of him. Ji-eun deliberately chose this outfit. It's not too revealing, but it highlights her long, flawless legs.

Once the pair reaches the shelf where IU put her phone, she turns around.

"I will make sure that you enjoy yourself."

She gets on her knees in front of him.

IU expected him to not last very long, but here she is. Her face pressed against books about biology as she gets fucked from behind. The recording must be ten minutes long already, plenty of footage for Seulgi to enjoy later on.

Ji-eun was able to stay mostly quiet up until now. The guy's pace keeps increasing as he starts to reach his limit. She feels his young cock in her wet pussy, enjoying the fact that he is barely older than half her age. She never doubted herself. She knew every guy wants to fuck her. Whatever their age.

"Turn me around."

IU is close to her own orgasm herself. The student does as she says, turning her around to face him. She leans against the bookshelf, staring at the one across the isle. That's where her phone is hidden. Her dark, lustfilled eyes are glued to the camera as he starts to thrust into her again.

Her small Gucci shorts are lying at Ji-eun's feet. She wasn't wearing underwear, knowing she would have to take it off anyways.

"You fuck me so good."

She whispers into his ear as she places her head onto his shoulder.

His hands hold her small waist, pounding her into the shelf full of books.

"Fuck!"

IU is unable to not moan loudly, when she finally cums. Her pussy contracting around the young guy's cock, making him orgasm as well. She can't believe how good this felt. How good it still feels.

This was a better fuck than what she expected. Not just because he is way younger.

As he let's his cock slip out of her, IU watches his cum drip out of her pussy. She can't blame him. Her pussy is just so incredibly tight when she cums.

"Oh fuck."

Seulgi sighs as she cums on her fingers. Her phone is in the other hand, her screen showing IU's new video. Seulgi knew she could pull it of, but never expected it to be this hot. The way Ji-eun looked at the camera while she got railed into the bookshelf....

Seulgi tries to collect herself as she hears her members walk around. Yeri and Joy both seem to be in a very good mood today.

With shaky fingers, she starts typing on her phone.

"What do you have for me?'

Seulgi is genuinely curious. At this point the two of them did pretty much everything. She doesn't even know what task she should give IU after this one.

"The two of us have a music show soon, right?"

"Yeah."

"If that hot camera man is there again, I want you to suck him off, while I watch."

Seulgi remembers the face fucking on the beach mere hours ago.

"Deal."

"Why don't you cum on my pretty face, hmm?"

Seulgi kneels in front of the young man, stroking his cock. IU is sitting on the couch behind her, watching and getting herself off. IU's dressing room looks like it has become a scene of some dirty movie as Seulgi wraps her lips around the man's cock once more. Her head bobs up and down, making him groan and take a fistful of her hair.

Seulgi's pussy feels even wetter than usual, probably because she has someone watching. She wants to prove to IU that she is the better one at sucking cock.

"Are you enjoying your reward?"

IU sighs as she looks at the guy, who's eyes are glued to Seulgi's face. He nods, unable to understand how ge got himself into this. When he started working, he never expected someone like Seulgi to walk up to him after the show, asking if he wants some head.

She is now doing her best to make him cum, her slow blowjob proving enough for the guy eventually.

While IU has her hand rub her pussy, she watches how he starts cuming on Seulgi's face. Rope after rope of his cum stains her skin, some of it getting into her eyes.

Seulgi let's out a satisfied hum as she starts to clean his cock.

"You taste delicious."

She gives his tip one last kiss, before he starts to pull up his pants. There is another group about to perform.

As the two women watch him leave, Seulgi takes some of the tissues from the small coffee table and starts to clean her face.

"Anything else?"

Seulgi shakes her head.

"I can't come up with a good idea."

IU sighs as she licks her fingers clean. She enjoys the taste of her pussy just as much as the guys who eat her out.

"Me neither. I was afraid this would happen."

"So what now? Do we end this in a tie?"

IU raises and eyebrow.

"Do you think you are better slut than me?"

Seulgi shrugs her shoulders.

"Let's just say I got two faicals today. What about you?"

IU shakes her head.

"We can't end it like this."

The notification sound of Seulgi's phone interrupts their conversation. The younger woman unlocks her phone, before scrolling around.

"What are you doing?"

She sees Seulgi bit her lip as she seems to read something.

"There is another smut fic about me."

"You actually read those?"

"They are hot. I like how my fans think about me."

She gives IU a wink, before she keeps reading the new post.

The wheels in the older girl's mind start to turn.

"Do you think they would do this to us in person? What they write?"

"Unnie..."

Seulgi looks at her.

"I like how you're thinking."

"We should invite some of the writers so they have more inspiration for their stories."

The two of them laugh.

"That's a good idea."

Seulgi scrolls through her phone.

"But there are so many. If we would try to fuck them all, our careers would be over before we got to all of them. We don't have so much time."

"Who says we have to fuck them individually?"

IU's smirk makes Seulgi chuckle.

"I like where this is heading."

"But how are we going to get them all in one place? They probably live all over the world."

Seulgi ponders for a moment.

"How about we send them dms and pictures of us? It should work. Especially when we tell them that we are inviting others as well. This way they can communicate with each other, making sure we aren't trying to scam them or something."

"Sounds like a plan. What could go wrong?"

IU regrets those words as soon as she opens the door of the practice room. Two weeks later and here they are. The two women look at the fully packed room. Seulgi tries to count the guys who are here. They messaged about twenty guys, but it now looks more like thirty or forty. It seems like word has spread.

"Is this a good or a bad sign?"

IU looks around as well. She had a threesome before, but this is quite different. Even if Seulgi and IU get used at the same time, there are still gonna be at least fifteen guys for each of them.

"Are you backing out?"

IU shakes her head.

"Why would I?"

Seulgi chuckles. She is nervous, but tries to hide it.

"Let's make another bet. Whoever makes the most guys cum in 15 minutes wins. The other person is going to be a free use for everyone."

Ji-eun likes the idea. She imagines all those guys taking turns on her and Seulgi, using their bodies as fuck toys.

"Sounds like I'm gonna win."

The older girl is confident. The high school boy is proof of the fact, how tight her pussy can become when she cums. No one survives that.

"But no fucking."

IU looks at Seulgi.

"What?"

"No fucking. Only your mouth and hands."

"Hey, that's boring."

Seulgi scoffs.

"You are not up for that?"

IU rolls her eyes.

"Fine. Watch and learn."

She walks inside, all heads turn towards her as Seulgi follows quickly after.

"Hi, everyone!"

IU waves.

"I guess the two of us don't need to introduce ourselves. You all know, why you are here?"

She sees everyone nod their heads.

While IU talks, Seulgi let's her eyes roam the room once more. Now that she is inside, she can count properly. She stops at 31 as her eyes falls on to a man, who is standing further back. He is a little taller than most of the guys in the room. She sees his biceps underneath the sleeves of his shirt, the bulge in his pants visible, without him even having a hard on.

Seulgi licks her lips. This is going to be a fun evening. Because she zoned out for a couple of moments, she didn't catch what IU was saying.

But when suddenly all of the guys start walking towards them, Seulgi immediately feels her panties getting damp. This is it. In the back of her mind, she still has a little bit of doubt left. It vanishes soon though as the first guy reaches her.

She sees IU kneeling down next to her, Seulgi does the same. The sound of ten guys opening the zippers of their pants almost makes Seulgi drool. She watches the first guys pulling their pants down, taking their cocks out.

Seulgi glances at the clock, about to start their bet. But IU is already reaching forward, taking hold of the first man's cock.

"Are these all for me? So nice of you."

She coos as she holds another man's dick with her other hand.

Seulgi doesn't want to fall behind. She reaches for the man nearest to her, pulling him forward by his cock.

"If everyone is gonna be as big you...."

She trails off, feeling the guy getting harder in her hand.

Seulgi decides to use her mouth early. She takes the man's cock into her mouth, savouring the taste. At the same time, the other guys around her make her use her hands.

By now, pretty much all the guys have gotten rid of their pants and are standing around the two women. IU is starting to suck off her first guy as well, both her hands busy with stroking two other men.

Seulgi closes her eyes as she hears everyone moan, occasionally switching cocks. There are five guys directly standing around her right now. More than enough to enjoy herself.

She is excited as she feels everyone's stares on her. This is something entirely different than singing and dancing on stage. And yet, it makes her equally happy. That rush of adrenaline makes her suck the guy's cock even faster.

IU takes another man into her mouth, savouring the new taste. Wearing this this suit might not have been the best idea, because they guys can't have easy access. But she still feels someone from behind sneaking his hands around her waist. She moans around the cock in her mouth as she feels someone rub the fabric over pussy.

Seulgi is starting to suffer the same fate as IU. The guys around her start touch her body, making her squirm underneath them. All the attention makes her wet as hell, wishing they would fuck her already. Why did she make that bet with IU?

She regrets it now as the first guys let's his hand sneak inside her shorts. His strong fingers make Seulgi moan around the cock in her mouth. The man who she is blowing puts his hand onto her head, unable to resist the urge to cum in her mouth much longer.

IU has driven one of the guys who stand around her to a similar level of arousal. He is pushing her head onto his cock, while her two hands are still busy, stroking the four guys on her sides, switching occasionally.

Seulgi let's out a surprised gasp when she feels the first man cuming. But it's not the cock in her mouth, but one of the guys on her right. She was stroking his cock up until now. His warm cum hits her pretty face, making her moan around the dick in her mouth. It makes that guy cum too. He shoots his load down her throat. Seulgi feels like she is in heaven. The warm sperm on her right cheek makes her sigh in pleasure as she turns towards the next guy, ready to suck him off.

IU is keeping up with Seulgi, making the first guy cum in her mouth. She swallows all of it immediately, ready to give another guy head. The guy on her left is trying to take her jacket off, which makes it harder for her to use her hands. Eventually, she gets rid of that useless piece of clothing, feeling two hands unbuttoning her shirt.

Seulgi feels someone's hand dip a finger inside her pussy. She has been unable to keep her hands off herself for these last two weeks and yet she melts at his touch.

Ji-eun keeps sucking off the guy in front of her, until she feels someone cuming on her hand. She looks to her right, letting his dick fall out of her mouth. She licks her hand clean, before taking the guy who just came into her mouth. His cum tastes delicious as she cleans his cock, hoping she can make him cum again soon.

Seulgi feels a pair of hands groping her tits underneath her grey top.

Still with another man's cock in her mouth, she turns her head towards him. With a seductive stare, she eggs him on to slide his hands underneath the fabric.

Seulgi let's her tongue swirl around the top of the cock in her mouth as she feels her nipples being pinched. The other man is now inserting a second finger into her wet snatch. This was supposed to be a competition on how many guys they can get off, not how many guys can get her off.

Either way, Seulgi tries her best to outcompete IU as she feels several hands on her body.

The older woman feels how the fingers on her covered center now start to make her pants wet. Her panties are already drenched, this many men around her too much for her mind to handle. Ji-eun never felt this good.

Someone is now letting her white shirt slip off her shoulder, exposing the lack of a bra. Her upper body is only covered by her tie, which doesn't hide much. Multiple hands make use of her newly exposed skin, some pinching her nipples, while others let their hands wander over her body.

The sight of the naked celebrity in front of him makes the guy in her mouth climax. IU feels his cum paint her mouth as she gulps it down, already looking for her next victim.

"Oh fuck."

The guy in front of Seulgi groans as she pulls him out of her mouth.

"Oh yeah. Paint my face."

Seulgi closes her eyes and sticks her tongue out. Two quick strokes later, she feels his cum staining her skin. Some of it hits her nose, but most lands on her lips and tongue.

"Good boy."

Seulgi winks at him as she cleans her lips with her tongue, making sure she doesn't waste a drop.

Once she opens her mouth again, she is surprised when two guys thrust into her at the same time. Seulgi never sucked off two guys at once, her competitiveness showing as she starts without hesitation. She is going to win this bet and she is going to humiliate IU, until she admits that Seulgi is the bigger slut.

At the same time, IU has another man cuming in her mouth. She almost chokes at the amount of cum he forces down her throat. Once she let's his cock fall out of her mouth with a loud pop, she feels a hand roughly grabbing her tie. Still on her knees, she gets turned around, faced with another hard cock. The guy's hand is still holding her black tie as he pulls her towards him, making Ji-eun take his cock.

Seulgi is unable to speak or do anything properly with her mouth as she tries her best to keep the two dicks inside of her. Only her tongue is able to swirl around their tips occasionally. The two guys keep thrusting into Seulgi's mouth with no intention on stopping anytime soon.

IU's mouth is being used as well. The men in the room starting to grow more confident. You don't have a lot of chances to get a blowjob from Seulgi or IU.

That being said, the guy in the older woman's mouth uses this rare chance to finally cum in her mouth. This must already be the third time she is swallowing someone's load. IU is barely able to keep up with counting. Her hands are slowly starting to get tired after stroking so many guy's cocks. She glanced at the clock. Seven minutes to go. How can she win this bet? She sees Seulgi sucking off two guys at once. Needy slut. IU watches for a moment as they both cum inside Seulgi. They make the younger woman choke as they fill her throat.

Once they are done and take a step back, Seulgi breathes heavily, some of their jizz got onto her face. As she wipes it off, she sees someone else standing in front of her. The guy she noticed earlier. He seems even taller, now that she is kneeling.

Seulgi scoops up some of the cum on her face with a finger, before licking it off with her tongue.

He hasn't taken his jeans off, but Seulgi already knows how big he must be. She reaches forward, fumbling with the belt. A guy on her right starts rubbing his cock all over her face, which makes her stick her tongue out. Seulgi keeps eye contact with the guy in front.

"Come here."

IU whispers towards one of the guys to her left, before starting to get rid off her pants. Seulgi said she is not allowed to use her pussy. No one said something about anal. The guy is not the biggest, which makes him perfect for this. As much as IU is used to have a cock up her ass, she always needs to adjust at first.

"Fuck my ass. Cum in me."

She slips off her grey panties, throwing them to the side. They are heavy and wet with her juices. She sees one of the guys pick it up and wrap it around his cock, before stroking himself with it.

IU feels a familiar tingle inside her body as she lies on her back. All the guys above her look down on her. The man who is supposed to fuck her is now kneeling between her legs, another above her head. The latter pushes his dick down, making Ji-eun take him into her mouth.

The guy between her legs rests his tip against her puckered hole, before slowly starting to push forward. IU moans around the dick in her mouth as she feels how her ass is getting stretched out.

"Fuck. You are so tight."

Seulgi turns to her left after hearing the man groan.

"Yah! Unnie!"

The younger woman stares at IU, who is lying on her back, getting her ass fucked. Her mouth is too full to answer.

Seulgi is about to say more as the big guy in front of her grabs her head and turns her towards her. He got rid of his boxers while she was distracted. Seulgi only manages a gasp, before he pulls her onto his cock.

With one forceful thrust he is already halfway down her throat. Seulgi gags and chokes. Even if she would've been prepared for this, she couldn't have taken so much at once. She feels her jaw getting heavy as the guy fucks her face. He uses her throat like a fleshlight, pounding a way like there is no tomorrow.

Seulgi feels her throat starting to get soar as tears start rolling down her cheeks. She is realizing that this is one of the roughest face fucks she ever had. But definitely not the last one.

His big cock keeps hitting the back of her throat, making Seulgi struggle for air. But he doesn't let go of her head, which means she can't back away.

The fingers in her pussy curl upwards, making her lower body tingle with pleasure. The combination of getting face fucked and fingered pushes Seulgi towards her limit. She never expected to be in this situation. On her knees, surrounded by almost ten guys. All of them stroking their cocks to her getting her throat bruised and her pussy played with.

Seulgi has to close her eyes, tears keep falling from underneath her eyelashes. They mix with her make up and the cum from earlier, turning her once flawless face into an absolute mess. The mixture starts to drip down her skin. Together with her saliva that spills out of her mouth. She is unable to close it. Her body feels numb as she is on the brink of orgasm as she gets the face fucking of her life.

IU's cheating has left her mind a while ago, her brain empty except for the pleasure she is feeling. And how soar her throat is. Seulgi doubts she is able to sing tomorrow. Or even the whole week if this continues.

She hears IU's voice over her own gags, but her own mouth is too loud to hear what the older woman is saying.

"Fuck, yes! Give me your cum!"

Ji-eun moans as she sees two guys on both her sides, stroking their cocks, ready to cum. The guy in her ass keeps her mind in a weird state of bliss as she feels like she is in heaven. The man who was fucking her mouth is replaced by another, who starts where he left of.

How many guys did she already suck off? Five maybe?

IU moans as around the new cock in her mouth. The two men start to cum all over her body. They cover IU's skin in warmth. Her chest, her tummy, her throat. All of it.

While IU keeps getting fucked, Seulgi feels someone from behind, who is starting to pull her shorts down.

Because the guy who is fucking her face is taller, she had to get on her knees to reach his cock. That means her white shorts can be slipped off easily.

Seulgi feels a pair of hands tug at her pink thong. The rubbing of her clit pauses for a moment, almost making Seulgi climax untouched.

The man who is holding her head in place gives Seulgi a second to relax. He pulls about halfway out, letting his cock rest on her tongue. She takes heavy breaths, trying to prepare herself for the next face fucking.

Another hand begins to play with her pussy as she feels the cock in her mouth starting to move again. This time, he doesn't fuck her fast. It's one slow, forceful thrust after another. It makes her head rock back everytime, before he pulls her onto his cock again.

Seulgi reaches the same state of pleasure as she did before. Hanging on the edge of her orgasm, she takes the face fucking like a champ, trying to keep eye contact with the man who is mercilessly using her.

Seulgi feels a pair of hands grope her butt. She is excited at first, but then, she feels someone's cock touch her rear entrance. She tries to shake her head, but the hands on head won't let her. She was never really the anal type. Plus, she doesn't want to cheat like IU does.

She doesn't have a choice. As the men around her see her struggle, they take holds of her wrists and guide her hands towards their cocks. Seulgi is unable to defend herself.

The cock down her throat, the fingers inside her pussy and now the tip of some man's cock in her ass. It all proves too much for Seulgi. Her shriek is muffled by the man in front of her as she cums around someone's fingers.

Seulgi's body shakes as she practically gets spitroasted. With every thrust into her mouth, she gets pushed onto the cock in her ass. With every thrust from the man inside her ass, she is getting forced to choke around the cock in her mouth.

She realizes how hot this must look for the others as she feels someone nutting on her grey top. His cum stains the fabric and Seulgi is reminded of the bet.

For a moment, she lost sight of the goal, just enjoying these men, having their way with her. But as much as Seulgi likes this situation, she still needs to make more guys cum than IU.

"Yes! Fill my ass up!"

Ji-eun moans loudly as she feels the cock in her ass starting to throb. In that moment, the guy above her climaxes, cuming all over her face. IU gasps as the unexpected facial hits her.

Before she is able to clean her face with her tongue and her fingers, the man between her legs cums inside of her.

"Oh fuck!"

Another moan escapes her cum stained lips as she feels his load paint the insides of her ass.

"Fuck! Please slow down!"

Seulgi screams. Half in pleasure, half in pain. The guy who is fucking her ass is the same guy who fucked her face so good a couple of minutes ago. He left a huge facial on her face, before giving others the chance to enjoy her mouth. Now, he is standing behind Seulgi, after getting her off the floor.

Her legs feel like jelly as she takes his pounding from behind. Her hands are useless by now, just loosely wrapped around two guy's cocks.

Another guy now steps in front of her to shut her up.

"You are too big for my ass."

She whines, hoping he would slow down, before another cock pushes past her lips.

Seulgi needily sucks on it, trying to blend out the pain in her ass. She has been used by so many guys now. She lost proper count a while ago. And if she would've looked up to check the time, she would have realized that the fifteen minutes were over fifteen minutes ago.

But Seulgi is too busy getting stuffed with cock from both ends. The black hairband she used to make a ponytail is barely holding up. Her hair looks like it's in a messy bun by now. Drops of white cum decorate her black, silk like hair.

IU is taking two cocks at the same time, too. But she is in a different position. She is placed on all fours in a circle of about ten guys. They all take turns fucking her ass and thrusting into her mouth.

The guy who is currently using her throat holds her tie in his hand, making her choke, whenever he gives it a light tug. The fact that she is getting choked makes IU even hornier. It would be something worthy of exploring later. Is she into getting choked?

Her thoughts are interrupted, when the man in her ass shoots his load. Ji-eun can almost feel how her body becomes heavier. This is the fourth time they came in her ass. If she counted correctly, she made them climax around 23 times already. There is more than enough proof all over her body.

A couple of minutes ago, someone used her still soaked panties to tie her hair back. Someone came on them beforehand. But instead of being disgusted, IU wonders if that counts as making them cum.

"I'm gonna gonna cum in your ass, bitch."

It's the first time the man behind her talked to Seulgi. Her dripping wet pussy craves his cock as he keeps fucking her ass. Because her mouth is closed, Seulgi can't answer. She feels someone's hand now rubbing her clit.

Another hand slaps her right ass cheeks. She doesn't know if that was the guy who is fucking her or someone else. The sting causes her to moan around the cock in her mouth.

"Fuck!"

The guy behind her groans, before he pumps Seulgi's ass full with cum. Her eyes roll to the back of her head as her legs almost give out. His warm cum in her ass makes her see stars.

After he leaves her freshly fucked hole, Seulgi does her best to recover. She remembers that she set a time limit on their bet. She checks the clock on the wall. They have been doing this for over thirty minutes now?

"Unnie! Time's up!"

Seulgi's voice sounds hoars after she removed the cock out of her mouth.

IU tells everyone to stop what they are doing. Seulgi has to kneel down again, her legs too weak to carry her.

Ji-eun slowly walks over to her. She feels cum leak out of her ass. Everyone is staring at the pair, waiting to find out who lost.

"So?"

Seulgi looks up at IU. The older woman is still wearing her tie, her hair now held back by her panties. Her body is covered in cum, wherever you look. Her face, her tummy, her chest, her feet.

Seulgi looks similarly used. Her back is still warm from the load of cum she got, while someone fucked her ass from behind.

"25 now."

Seulgi's eyes widen. She didn't expect it to be this close.

"Wow, unnie. You are no slouch."

Ji-eun raises an eye brow.

"Why do you sound so happy?"

"27."

"What?"

"I made them cum twenty seven times."

Seulgi feels someone's cum drip out of her freshly fucked ass and onto her legs. She grins up at IU, who is looking at her with anger and surprise written on her face.

"You know what that means, right?"

IU nods hesitantly.

"Let's tie her up boys."

Seulgi chuckles as she sees someone grabbing IU's wrists and holding them behind her back.

"What-?"

She tries to struggle against his grip, but Seulgi shakes her head.

"You can't run away, unnie. You are now officially a free-use whore."

Before she can reply, someone already stuffed her mouth with a piece of silk. She only realises a moment later that she has Seulgi's pink thong in her mouth. Someone is covering her mouth, so she can't spit it out.

IU's tie is finally gone too, now being used as a way to tie her hands together. She tries to resist, but the guys around her are way taller and stronger than her. Ji-eun sees someone getting a chair from one of the corners of the practice room.

Seulgi suggested this location. It's Red Velvet's former place of learning choreos, when they were rookies. They used a second room outside of the SM building. No one uses it anymore.

When someone sits her down, IU stares at everyone around her. The about forty guys wait for Seulgi's first move.

"You two,"

Seulgi points at two guys on her left.

"Suck on her tits."

They do as she says, both stepping on either side of IU. The older woman moans into Seulgi's panties as she they lean over her. They both wrap their lips around her nipples, sucking on them. The occasional bite makes her squirm in the chair.

"I feel like the gag is now making her too quiet."

Some of the guys nod in agreement.

Seulgi reaches forward to take her panties out of IU's mouth.

"Don't forget, you still have to admit that I'm the better slut."

IU would've stuck her her tongue out, but is currently unable to do so. The two guys working on her tits make her sigh and mewl.

Ji-eun's eyes widen in surprise as she feels Seulgi working on her pussy. It feels weird as she tries to look down, wanting to know what's going on. The guys' heads are blocking her view.

Her head sinks back as she feels Seulgi pushing her thong into the older woman's pussy. A deep moan escapes her lips, once the piece of silk is completely buried inside of her.

"You always bragged about how tight your pussy is. Let's see if that's still the case."

She turns around.

"Guys, I want you to stretch her out like crazy."

IU moves her head to be able to see what's going on. The first guy is already standing in front of her, his cock in his hand.

"Wait. First pull out-Fuck!"

IU moans loudly as he pushes half of his cock inside her with one thrust. She can't tell yet, if Seulgi's panties make her feel better or not. But IU can't help but squirm even more as the man starts to fuck her.

She feels fuller than usual as the guy pushes fully into her stuffed pussy. Together with the two guys who keep playing with her chest, he makes Ji-eun see stars.

She realises this is only the beginning, when another guy steps forward. He grabs IU's ponytail, forcing her down. She automatically opens her mouth, ready to suck his cock. It has become an instinct for her by now. Without even thinking about it, she starts to suck him off.

The two men stop sucking her tits as they both watch how the new guy makes her bob her head up and down on his cock. He and the guy who fucks her stand side by side.

Seulgi looks around them, trying to see what's going on. She feels a pair of hands wrap around her waist. She looks up, seeing the man who just came in her ass.

"You still don't have enough?"

Her cheeky grin makes him chuckle.

"I never expected you to be such a whore."

His cock is now resting between her cheeks. Now that she feels it again, Seulgi can't believe how his dick fit in her ass.

"And this is probably the only chance I'm ever gonna get. So I want all of your holes."

Seulgi leans her head on his chest.

"Take me then."

She feels him aligning his cock with her pussy. He slowly pushes inside, making Seulgi moan. Her half open eyes see, how the guy who is fucking IU is cuming inside her pussy. She hears the older girl's moans as he pulls out and leaves. A moment later, the next guy stands in front of her.

Seulgi can't believe what she has done. What she is still doing. What would her members say to this? She chuckles as she thinks about Yeri's nature. The maknae would probably follow her example.

Her smile is wiped off Seulgi's face as the man behind her increases his pace. His thick cock makes her body heat up as he almost hugs her into his chest.

Seulgi is almost standing on his toes, only his hips working overtime. He has his face in her neck, kissing her skin.

IU moans as another man walks forward. The man who just came in her mouth already left, leaving her throat all sticky. She would've begged for a break, but she knows that Seulgi won't give her one. Although the younger girl is currently occupied with getting fucked, IU dismisses the idea.

She invitingly opens her mouth, before the guy even reaches her. Instead of pushing his scock into her mouth, he takes a hold of her ponytail. Only now, IU realises that he has been stroking his cock while he approached her. His cum is now painting her face, leaving another layer of jizz.

IU moans as the warmth hits her face. At the same time the man in her pussy cums as well. He shoots his load into IU, giving her a second cream pie within a couple of minutes.

"Just... Just give me a second."

Seulgi breathes heavily, almost missing her chance to humiliate IU even further. Slowly, she manages to get of the guy's chest she was leaning on. Standing in front of the older woman, Seulgi reaches down. Her freshly fucked pussy already oozes with cum. She has to fumble around a little, before finally finding her own thong deep inside Ji-eun's cunt.

IU whines as Seulgi slowly pulls it out. There is no sign of the fact that the silk was pink once. It's stained with IU's juices and the other guy's cum.

"They are gonna fuck you for real now."

IU shakes her head, knowing what Seulgi is planing. But because her hands are tied, she can't defend herself.

Seulgi pushes her thong into IU's mouth. The older woman tastes the mixture of her own juices and two loads of cum.

"Take it like the whore you are, unnie. I don't want to hear any complains, once I'm back."

She turns around, taking the hand of the guy, who just fucked her.

"Come with me."

And with that she leaves IU alone with the forty guys. Bound to the chair, unable to yell after her. She sees some of them start to walk towards her.

"Seulgi!"

Her muffled screams stay unheard as Seulgi and her special friend enter the practice room next door.

"I have two more hours until I have to be back at the dorm."

She slings her arms around his neck, grinding her naked center against his cock.

"I want you to fuck me until then."

How long has it been already?

IU can't tell, the clock is hanging on the wall behind her. 30 minutes? An hour?

She would've thought the guys would stop at one point, but she is proven wrong. This is their only chance to fuck Lee Ji-eun however they want. They can use every single one of her holes.

Korea's number one celebrity isn't even sitting on the chair anymore. They started to take turns with sitting in the chair, making IU sit in their laps.

She never experienced having all three of her holes stuffed with cock. But that's the case right now. The man who's lap she is sitting on is thrusting upwards into her ass. The man in front of her is fucking her pussy. Another has placed both of his hands on her head, forcing her to lean to her left.

IU doesn't know how long it has been since she was able to talk. There are still three guys standing in line behind the guy who is fucking her face.

She also doesn't know how often all of them came, since Seulgi left. Probably all of them at least once or twice. Maybe even more. That would make at least forty to eighty times.

That could be the reason why about fifty percent of IU's skin is covered in cum. Her tits and her midriff are full with it, but they still don't compare to her face. She feels like she has several layers of make up on. Her hair probably wasn't spared either.

And how many cream pies did she already get? At least a quarter of their loads. She must have swallowed so much cum by now. Probably more than a liter or two.

Ji-eun moans around the cock in her mouth as she climaxes once again. Her pussy pulsates around the cock in her, making the man cum in her snatch. She even lost count of how many times she came.

Where the fuck is Seulgi?

"Oh god! Oh god! Oh god!"

Seulgi mumbles and moans. She is lying on the sofa in the corner of the second practice room. The man she took with her is fucking her missionary style. His hand is in her hair, forcing her upper body to lift off the couch.

"Gonna cum!"

Her warning is almost too late. Seulgi climaxes right after the last word leaves her mouth. Her pussy grips onto his cock as he keeps fucking her through her orgasm. Her body is covered in sweat and cum. How often did he make her cum already?

Seulgi moans as she is taken toward another high. She feels his cock suddenly leave her pussy, before he pushes against her puckered hole. The young woman moans and whines as he starts to switch with every thrust. First her pussy, then her ass hole and then her pussy again.

Seulgi can't do anything but lie there, feeling her holes getting used in such an unholy manner.

She is a mumbling mess underneath him, feeling his cock in her ass and then in her pussy again.

Her eyes rest on his sweat covered body as she feels him trying to hold back his climax. As they lock eyes, they both know that this is the last one. The pair is too drained to go on much longer.

"On my face. I want it on my face."

The man nods, unable to form words. Seulgi's ass too tight for him to think straight.

He manages to switch between her holes for a couple of times, before he finally pulls out once and for all.

With awkward movements, Seulgi manages to push herself off the couch. Her limbs feel like pudding, her energy barely enough to keep her eyes open.

He strokes himself to climax as he stares at Seulgi in front of him.

How is she still able to look this cute?

That thought rushes through his head, right before he orgasms. His load isn't as big as it used to. Seulgi's pussy has claimed more of it for itself already.

It's still enough to make her sigh with pleasure though. The warm cum covers her nose and cheeks.

IU opens her eyes. She looks around the room, realizing that she is the only one. And a moment later she recognizes her bedroom. How did she get here?

She hears someone in the kitchen, fumbling with the pans.

Ji-eun tries to get up. Her body feels soar all over. She feels like she has been hit by a truck. Her body seems to be clean on the outside, but not on the inside. She can feel someone's cum in her pussy and ass. Her throat is still sticky, making it hard to breathe.

IU can't even remember how many guys came in her throat as she reaches for the glass of water on her night stand.

Her feet barely lift off the ground as she stumbles into the kitchen, only wearing a robe.

Seulgi seems to be making egg fried rice.

"Hello, sleepyhead."

Seulgi chuckles at IU's perplexed look on her face.

"I brought you here after you passed out. Do you know how long it took me to get all of that cum off your skin?"

IU shakes her head.

Seulgi pours the rice into two bowls.

"I have good news."

Ji-eun is only able to sit down at the counter, waiting for Seulgi to hand her a spoon.

"I found someone knew to compete with us."

IU looks up. Her eyes still look sleepy and tired and exhausted. And yet, Seulgi is able to catch a glimpse of lust in them.

"Who?"

"She should be here any minute."

In that moment the doorbell rings.

"She and her members had a similar competition. Like the two of us. She won and is looking for women, who are on her level. I told her we got fucked by forty guys at the same time."

Seulgi says as she walks towards the door.

"I-I'm not sure if I can start having sex again immediately. Maybe give me a couple of days."

IU's tired, hoarse voice makes Seulgi chuckle.

"Don't worry. Me and Jennie already have something planned for the two of us."

She opens the door.

"Hi Seulgi!"

Jennie and Seulgi hug each other.

"Ready to go to the movies?"

"Yeah, just let me eat dinner."

"What?"

Only now IU realises what time it is. She slept the whole day.

"Hi, unnie."

Jennie waves at her. The older woman takes a look at her outfit. She immediately knows that watching a movie will not be the only thing they do in the cinema.

---------------

(Alternative ending)

Hi everyone!

I hope you enjoy the first story of the December special.

I haven't written something like this before, so I'm not sure how well it turned out. I did my best to write a good build up, because I didn't want to jump straight into the main part.

Have a great day! See you next week for the second one!

[bluenotes75]

Trust pt.2

Miles Morales ! 42 x Fem ! Reader x Miles Morales ! 1610

wc : 5,9k Warnings : angst, possessiveness, all characters are around 19 years old, cheating, no proofread, what I could remember from my spanish class 3 years ago, eventual love triangle ?, dramaaaa. pt.1 - pt.2 - pt.3 (coming soon)

Sorry, it took so long, the chapter just kept getting longer. Anyways, hope you enjoy <3

You sighed as you closed the door of the store. It was already past midnight and you had just finished a long shift. Oddly, the store had been particularly active today and you couldn't catch any break. Now you sought one simple thing. To find the comfort of your bed.

You removed the key from the lock and frowned as a drop of water touched your skin. It was raining. 

Wonderful.

You had no umbrella with you as you didn't anticipate the night to get rainy. Regretting your choice of clothes, you pressed your bag on top of your head to protect yourself from the rain. Your home was a bit far from the cornerstone you worked at and you knew you had to hurry up because the streets were not safe at night.

As you headed toward your apartment, your thought deviated toward him. 

It had been one month. Four weeks since everything fell apart.

At least, to you.

Twenty-eight days since you broke up with Miles Morales. Six hundred and seventy-two hours since he betrayed you and you liked to think that you had moved on. It was the easiest way to go through your days. 

 And if your heart ached each time you found his clothes in your closet or if you woke up in the middle of the night to noises on your window thinking it was him, you denied it.

The pain that you felt that night was unmatched. It was still fresh, rooted deep in your memories. But with time, you discovered it was nothing next to the pain of leaving without Miles. He wasn't there physically, yet he occupied each ounce of your mind.

Contrary to what you could believe, Miles wasn't any better. You were on his mind, 24/7. 

He regretted. He regretted considerably. He had made the worst mistake of his life and just like that, you slipped through his fingers. 

You were his world. His universe. He missed your presence. He missed holding you in his arms, feeling the warmth of your skin, tickling the curve of your hip, caressing the softness of your skin with his lips and seeing the deepness of your loving gaze when you looked up at him. He missed everything about you and he refused to let you go.

And this became the hardest part for you. Miles had tried to get you back. 

Countless time.

Because even if your mind was screaming no, your heart was still weak for the boy. And he knew it.

He hadn't stopped texting you in the weeks following your break up. He had asked for forgiveness so many times you couldn't even count it. When you blocked him on every social media, he directly came to your house. He would knock on your window at late hours like he always did. 

You would leave him outside.

After some time, he finally decided to give you some space but you could still feel his presence from afar. You could feel his stare on your back sometimes as you came back from work. You knew he was still making sure you were safe. Sometimes, you find to notes from him on your window.

You didn't read them.

You had thought of taking him back. On your lowest nights, you had thought that maybe it was for the best. You felt nothing without him. Even if the relationship brought your more strain than anything else, it was at least something. It was toxic but addicting. It made you cry at night but it made you feel high on other days. The only thing stopping you from going back was that little doubt ticking in the back of your brain.

What if he did it again?

But if there was one thing you knew, is that you were faithful to yourself. You were too afraid to put yourself through that process again if he was to mess up again. He had already broken you once, had left you miserable and you had suffered too much to trust him again.

So with time, you learned to let go. You had finally gotten used to living without him. Each day you were forgetting him more and more and you felt like yourself once again. And while your heart was still tied to his in a way, you knew you could live peacefully now.

You were dragged out of your thoughts by a noise behind you, yet you didn't give it a second thought. However, when you heard again, this time followed by irregular steps against the wet concrete, you frowned.

You peeked behind your shoulder and noticed a man, both taller and broader, dressed in a black hoodie. You couldn't see his face.

Your heartbeat picked up.

You accelerated, hoping that you were worrying for nothing, but that hope was soon crushed when the steps also became faster. Before you could think of a way to get yourself out of this situation, a hand covered your mouth and you were dragged into an alley.

It was dark and you could barely see anything as you fought back against the broad body that manhandled you against the wall. 

''What pretty girl like you doing outside at such an hour.''

He whispered, his breath reeking of booze. He pressed his body against yours and travelled his hands on your back. Your cheeks pressed hard against the rugged brick wall, you felt tears burn the brim of your eyes as you realized what was about to happen.

''N-no! Please don't''

''Shut up bitch, you want it. You wouldn't be walking alone at such hours if not,'' he laughed in your ears.

''Nah, I think her no was clear enough.''

You jerked at the new voice and soon, the hands holding you against the wall disappeared. You turned around panicked, gasping as the man who was once all over you, now laying on the ground, holding his bruised cheek. Another guy dressed in a red suit stood over him.

''I hate assholes like you-'' the newcomer shot a string of web to tie up the man against the wall ? ''who think they can do whatever they want.''

You rubbed your eyes to make sure you saw well. Web ?

''Don't touch women again, got it ?''

The man nodded quickly, eyes widened in fear before the guy in red sent another punch, knocking him out for good.

You stood there, back against the wall, frozen. You had never heard of a guy in red playing the hero in Brooklyn.

New-york was filled with villains. You just hoped to fall on the nicest one.

As if reading your thoughts, the guy in red walked toward you.

''Hey, are you fine? I'm sorry this happened !''

He stopped in his track when you flinched.

''Look, I don't want you any harm,'' he raised his arms in the air as proof. ''Can I...come closer ?''

You nodded slowly, still speechless, and he did so. From closer, he was towering over you and you had to raise your head to properly look at him.

Just like with your ex.

You frowned, feeling stupid for thinking of the guy in such a situation and finally spoke.

''Thank you."

You watched as he smiled through his mask.

''Of course,'' he raised his hand before stopping abruptly. ''Can I touch you ?''

You nodded and he held your chin, angling it to the side and checking your cheek.

''Good he didn't hurt you,'' he then took in your appearance. You were completely wet because of the rain and you had started shivering. He removed the coat he was wearing and wrapped it around your shoulders. ''Here.''

A million thoughts crossed your mind, yet you only cared about one.

The coat smelled like Miles. 

You shook your head, feeling stupid again. Were you so obsessed that you imagined your ex everywhere now? You really needed some sleep. 

But you didn't want to walk home alone.

''I'll bring you home,'' the boy announced before wrapping his arms around your hips. ''Hold onto me tight.''

You did as he said, confused about why but soon understood when he brought you both in the air.

''Oh god !''

You closed your eyes not daring to look down.

''I know,'' he laughed near your ear and you couldn't ignore the shivers that crossed your body at the familiarity of his voice.

In less than ten minutes, you were home after telling him the way.

''Thank you for this,'' you smiled shyly and handed him back his coat.

''Of course! ''

You looked at him and you just couldn't get rid of this picture of Miles. 

''Who are you ?''

You were shocked at your own question, the word escaping your mouth before you could stop yourself.

''Oh, I'm Spiderman," the guy said and you could hear the proudness in his voice.

''No, like who are you really?'' You slid your hands down his shoulders and his arms. It was a posture you knew too well. You could recognize that body in a million. ''Miles ?''

''W-what''

You grabbed the end of his mask and to your surprise, he didn't stop you. You raised it until it revealed his face.

A gasp escaped you as you saw Miles but....he didn't have braids. You studied him carefully. Same lips, same nose, same cheekbones, you almost got fooled. But when you made eye contact with him, you saw it.

It wasn't your ex.

His eyes weren't the same. Your ex had this hardened stare. A gaze built by the wall he created around himself. People said eyes were the mirror of the soul but you couldn't read anything through them.

This guy in front however had....innocence painted all over his eyes. His stare was soft, warm and solacing. 

''You aren't Miles, who are you ?''

The guy took a step forward, hope in his eyes. You stepped back.

''You know Miles Morales ?'' 

You shook your head freaked out by the situation and took another step back.

''Get out.''

The taller widened his eyes. 

''No, no please listen to me first.''

Maybe it was his eyes, maybe it was because he looked like Miles, you didn't know. But you didn't have the heart to chase him away one more time.

''You have five minutes.''

"So you're telling me that you are a hero from another earth that is exactly like mine and you saved people you weren't supposed to so a hoard of spidermans is following you and you need to go back to your earth to save your dad."

Miles nodded eagerly.

"I know it sounds crazy but yeah…that's pretty much it.''

''Damn,'' you breathed, letting the information sink in. ''And you need me for..?''

''To find a way back home.''

The boy stared at you expectantly, waiting for your answer. You bit the inside of your cheek before shaking your head.

''Look, I don't think I can help you with that.''

His face dropped and he clasped your smaller hands in his calloused ones.

''Nonono, please! You are the only one I could find and you seem to already know Miles Morales from here. You know how I need to act to stay unnoticed.''

You thought about his words. It made sense, but you didn't want to get involved in all that mess.

"I really don't know."

"Please !"

You wondered for a few more seconds. How where you supposed to refuse when he was looking at you pleadingly?

''Alright.''

His facial features broke into a grin and he pulled on your arm, making you collide against his chest.

''Thank you !''

You could only widen your eyes as you felt his arms tighten around you. You hadn't expected this sudden affection. Dumbstruck, you failed to return the gesture until he froze and leaned back, scratching the back of his neck awkwardly.

''Sorry, I got too excited…'' he looked away, your stare becoming too intense for him.

You stayed silent for a few seconds before bursting out laughing. The Miles you knew was so cold so this new Miles with such a…bubbly personality was interesting.

You couldn't help but think it was sweet…and very cute.

''It's fine.''

He seemed satisfied with your reaction as he joined you before your laughers died down.

''Uh, I might have sum else to ask.''

You hummed.

''I kinda need a place to stay.''

Miles towered over you, holding bedsheets, while you hugged a pillow to your chest.

''So how are we going to do this ?''

You two made eye contact before glancing at the bed again. Suddenly, the boy dropped the fabric on the floor and rose his hand next to his chest.

''I'll sleep on the ground, it's fin-''

''no, you don-''

''Yes, I do. I'm the guy and the guest, so sleep on the bed and I'll-''

''Just lay down, I don't mind.''

You slid under the covers not waiting for his reaction and soon, you heard the mattress dip toward his side. He was careful to let some space between you.

You rose the fabric over both of your bodies and sighed. This was a long day and you were honey tired. You tried to get some sleep but you could feel starring eyes burning your skin.

''What is it ?'' you whispered with your eyes still closed.

You heard the rub of covers before Miles cleared his throat.

''Nothing, nothing.''

Then the mattress bent again and you assumed he turned the other way.

''Oh, by the way. My mom can't know you are here. So you know…be discreet.''

You didn't want to have to explain to her what Miles, your ex - even if it's not really him - was doing in your room at such an hour.

''Don,t worry, I'm discreet.''

The next afternoon, you found yourself in the library. It was far from your apartment and your school, which reduced the chance of running into an unrequired acquaintance.

''Look at this, doesn't it look interesting ?''

You extended a book about something called 'The Super-Collider'. 

''That's basically a particle collider right ?'' You added as Miles grabbed the heavy textbook.

The taller boy nodded, peeking at the back cover.

''Yes, it uses electromagnetic fields to speed up charged particles. And-

''Eventually, pull or join different objects coming from different dimensions,'' you finished, scratching your chin as you wondered about something. You didn't notice Miles' amazed expression. 

''You know what it is ?''

You looked at him as if he was crazy.

''Of course, didn't you watch The Flash ?''

His excitation vanished and you received silence as an answer.

''I'm joking, I'm just really interested in physics,'' you said pivoting back to the bookshelf and searching for another work that could be useful.

''Oh...I didn't know that. I wanna study in that field later.''

Your widened eyes shifted back to him.

''What, you literally hate phys-'' you stopped as remembered who you were with and you shook your head embarrassed. ''Nevermind.....It's nice to have someone who likes it like me.''

You couldn't help the thrill that invaded you. Your ex would always joke about your interests in physics and eventually, you stopped talking about it. So seeing this new Miles show interest brought a certain warm feeling to your stomach. You didn't know what it was, but the longer you were with the boy, the more interesting you found him. You had found a special chemistry with him and it's like you two had always been friends.

You liked that sensation.

''I was wondering, are particle accelerators the reason why you are here ?"

The taller twisted his mouth to the side.

''Uh...not really? It's part of the reason though. Some type of butterfly effect,'' he finished as you opened another book. You simply hummed not pushing too much on the object. It didn't look like he wanted to talk much about it.

''I think we have enough for now. Let's buy them !''

You gazed at the raindrops interrupting the peaceful reflection of your face on the blurry window. It was particularly cold today, gray clouds snatching the sunrays from the city while its people ran down the streets to cover themselves from the water. To you, the scenery was simply gloomy.

A usual rainy day in Brooklyn.

You jumped as the doorbell of the store rang, pulling you out of your train of thought. You relaxed after realizing it was only a client. You were only 3 in the shop. You being the cashier, the man who had just crossed the door and Miles hanging upside down next to you while playing a ball.

''What's up with you? You've been daydreaming since morning.''

It had been 3 weeks since this Miles arrived from Earth 1610 and you had nearly spent all of your time with him. 

Well, it's not as if you had a choice since he lived in your apartment, but it didn't change the you two had gotten extremely close. You were hanging out every day. One time at the coffee shop and another time watching a movie while trying hairstyles on his hair. Just like yesterday.

You couldn't deny your attachment that had grown for him. Hell, just thinking about him made your heart flutter and you would find yourself stuck with a stupid grin on your lips.

At first, you kept comparing him with your ex. His accent, his gesture, what he liked and what he disliked. He didn't speak as much Spanish, he wasn't as mysterious and cold. But as time passed, you found yourself more and more drawn by this new Miles. He was more expressive, affectionate, supportive and careful with you. He knew how to make you laugh no matter the situation and you two shared multiple interests. 

You weren't oblivious. You quickly understood that the boy was slowly stealing your heart. But that doesn't mean you were ready for it.

You were used to feeling love with pain. To push and pull kind of relationship. To toxic and aggressive feelings. To spend the night worrying about your lover and only to find him bleeding the next day. To cry alone at night then drown your sadness in your boyfriend's arms for a few minutes before you had to separate again to go to school. 

But with Mile Morales, everything was different. It was sweet, warm and solacing. He was always next to you at night and he was careful with you in daylight. You felt protected and you weren't sleeping next to a criminal anymore. 

This was so different, but you liked it.

''I just didn't get much sleep last night.'' 

The taller jumped back to his feet before getting closer to you. He looked at your face carefully, worry painted all over his own features.

''I shouldn't have kept you up all night, sorry.''

You looked up at him with a chuckle before flicking his forehead softly.

''No, it was funny. You looked really cute with those coloured rubber bands in those cornrows I did,'' you teased, facing him.

He frowned before a tiny pout took over his mouth. It was nearly imperceptible but it was there.

''I looked like a kid. How am I supposed to be big and scary with that in my hair.''

You burst out laughing, the memory from last night coming back to you. You had told him you would braid his hair since he wanted to try something new but he ended up removing them because 'they were too tight, and his scalp was too soft for all that'. You knew he just wanted to remove the rubber bands.

''I'm still mad at you for destrpying my beautiful work.''

He smirked getting closer, reducing the space between you two.

''Don't be upset tesoro, what will I do if you are mad at me ?''

Your heart skipped a beat at the nickname, like it had done for the past weeks, and you looked away, to hide your shy smile. However, before you could answer, you heard a gun cocking right in front of you.

You slowly looked up, to find a riffle pointed right to your face. Your heart dropped as you failed to understand whatever the client from earlier was screaming.

''Open the cash register and gimme the bills,'' when he noticed your lack of reaction, he brought the gun closer to your forehead. ''Hurry the fuck up !''

However, before the stranger could try anything else, the gun was knocked out of his hands and his arms were joined together by web.

Everything passed in a flash and Miles quickly neutralize him and called the police. And if he gave a few unnecessary punches to the man, as he was already tied up, you didn't mention it. It was Miles' way to get back at the man and make him regret pointing his gun at you.

Before you could even realize what happened, the boy was in front of you, holding you tight by the elbow, checking up on you for the second time in less than 10 minutes.

''How are you feeling,'' he whispered, his low voice vibrating in your ear.

''G-good.''

Your voice left you like a whisper, still shaken by the event.

You had encountered multiple... ominous situations in this city. But being held at gunpoint and knowing your life was in the hands of a stranger was different. You realized how lucky you were to have Miles at your side at this exact moment and your eyes watered.

The boy read right through the facade you were trying to keep up, as he noticed your shivering and wrapped his arms around your shoulders, dragging you against himself.

''Come here precious.''

You tightened your hands around the low of his back, losing yourself in the warmness and the comfort of his embrace. You felt safe and the panic was slowly soothed away from you.

''Feeling better ?''

You nodded, slowly, face still hidden nestled in the crook of his neck.

''How come there's so much crime in this city,'' he sighed, caressing the back of your neck to bring you more comfort.

''We don't have Spiderman here, you know,'' you muttered, finally finding the energy to spill some words.

Your words were muffled by his skin and you felt him shiver at the sensation of your lips against his neck.

''Right.''

You expected him to laugh at your words so you looked up at him, frown plastered on your face.

''Are you mad ?''

His expression softened when he noticed you scowl and he shook his head.

''No,'' he rested his chin on top of your head. ''I just don't like the idea of you living all these years without anyone to protect you.''

You ignored the butterflies that invaded your stomach as his sentence, your lips growing into a grin against the crook of his neck.

''I'm not a damsel in distress.''

Miles only hummed, not letting go of you.

''Yeah, if you say so, preciosa.''

Everything was going perfectly. You and Miles were slowly finding more clues on how to send him back to Earth 1610 and by then, old Miles was already far in your memory.

You couldn't but wonder how unusual that was. You weren't used to just living peacefully. There was always something going on.

And you weren't wrong to feel so suspicious.

You were walking down the street as it was getting darker outside. 

Again.

You had to stay a few more hours at school to finish a group project and you hadn't realized how much time had passed. You cursed under your breath, remembering what happened the last time you found yourself walking for such an hour outside.

Not wanting to get in such a situation again, you accelerated until you arrived on the street where you live. You sighed, relieved, but before you could take your keys, a large hand caught your elbow, dragging you into the alley behind your apartment. You were pinned against the bricked wall and clenched your eyes shut, groaning at the impact.

What's with the people of this city and walls? Damn.

However, when you glanced at whoever seized you so brutally, your heart sank. You had completely forgotten about him and you had never expected him to come back.

''Miles.''

Your ex smirked staring up and down at your silhouette before licking his lips. A shiver travelled down your body at his action.

''Happy to see me mami ?''

You two made eye contact and you were hauled. His gaze was still as piercing as you remembered and it brought back unwanted memories. However, you suddenly blinked, waking up from your stupor and averted your eyes from the imposing male. Your expression turned sour and you tried to push him away, unsuccessfully.

''Leave me alone, Morales.''

He chuckled, taking a step forward to reduce the space between both of your bodies.

''So that's what we are doing now ?''

You kept your lips sealed and turned your head to the side as an answer. However, his fingers slid behind your neck, using his thumb to shift your head back to him.

''Look at me when I talk to you.''

''What do you want ?''

He rose his eyebrow at the dryness of your tone, still not used to such an attitude from you.

''I don't need a reason to see yah princesa.''

''I don't have time for this, move.''

Miles clenched his jaw, his eyes hardening at your words.

''Watch your tone.''

''Or what ?'' you raised your eyebrow at him with a bored expression. Two months ago, you would have never talked to him like that. But right now, you couldn't care less. You wanted to go home, take a shower and cuddle with your Miles. You were too tired for all that.

Your ex-boyfriend visibly took a deep breath and closed his eyes to calm himself down. You could see the frustration growing in him. But you didn't expect what he would say next.

''Who's that guy you've been hanging out with lately ?''

You froze at the question.

''What the- have you been following me ?''

''I asked you a question,'' Miles repeated louder this time.

''It's none of your business.''

''I'm being nice and you don't wanna try me. I don't like you talking to other guys and you know that.''

You scoffed at his nerve. Why was he acting like you were his or something?

''What part don't you understand in 'we're done' ?''

He took a deep breath and pinched his nose.

''Look, I fucked up mami. Lo sé and I hate myself for it. But I let you have some space for two months already, te necesito.''

''Miles, I don't love you anymore.''

He froze for a second but you could see him gulp slowly.

''I know you, stop playing hard to get.''

You rested your hand against your forehead tired of this situation already. 

''Are you being serious ?'' he asked again in disbelief.

But instead of answering, you pushed him back and this time, he didn't resist. 

''I'm leaving.''

''Where do you think you are going ?''

''Hopefully to my new boyfriend,'' you answered. Being honest was probably the only way to force him away from you.

''You don't want to do this,'' he said darkly. He clenched his jaw and rubbed his hand on his chin. You had never seen him so mad. ''I'm warning you.''

You shook your head with a sigh before ignoring him and entering your apartment. You knew he was saying empty words. Your ex would never dare to hurt you directly. He could cheat, and lie but never harm you intentionally.

That's what you thought at least.

Arriving in your room, you find your new Miles sitting at your desk, sketching something on a sheet. 

''Preciosa, you are finally here.''

You nodded with a tired smile.

''You're not sleeping yet ?''

He shook his head, leaning back on the chair and spreading his leg to be more comfortable. ''Nah, was waiting for you."

You raised an eyebrow at his position before throwing a shoe at him that he easily caught with one hand.

''Stop the manspreading in my room.''

He laughed before telling you to come closer. You obeyed and your eyes fell on the drawing he was making. 

It was you.

And it was you in a way you had never seen before. You looked...magnificent.

Your breath got stuck in your throat and couldn't help but wonder if that's how the boy saw you. 

All the stress you got from meeting your ex evaporated from your body as you sat on Miles' thighs and one of his hands rested on yours.

''It's beautiful.''

He hummed. ''When the muse is already gorgeous, it makes everything easier.''

Your heart jumped at the compliment and you pressed your head against his, running your thumb down his cheek as he kept drawing.

''Careful, you'll make my fro flat,'' the boy muttered, still focused on his sketch.

''I'll brush it out for you later,'' you giggled, continuing your ministration on his face.

A few more seconds passed and only the soft sound of a pencil running on paper filled the silence surrounding you. All until the boy broke the ice.

''I've always wanted to ask but...what's your relationship with Miles from here ?''

You gulped at this sudden question. Did he saw...what happened outside?

''Why you wanna know that ?''

Noticing your defensive reaction, he shook his head softly.

''Hey, I'm not forcing you to tell me, I was just wondering since you know...he never tried to contact you since I arrived. I kind of assumed you two were close since you recognized me in my suit. ''

You relaxed at his explanation.

''Oh, uh we were friends, but we had an argument and haven't really talked since.''

You didn't want to think about the guy anymore and ruin this wonderful moment. You hoped your Miles wouldn't mind the white lie you had just spitted out. 

Hopefully, the taller didn't seem to question you more and quickly changed the conversation.

It had been two weeks since your encounter with your ex and everything was going better than ever. Your mom had just left for a trip and the house was left to you and Miles. You woke up to the sound of the plate coming from the kitchen.

Loud sounds.

When you arrived in the living room, you found Miles throwing water in a pan which contained burning eggs. Your mouth dropped.

''What are you doing ?''

He jumped at the sound of your voice before placing his hand on his chest right over his heart.

''Shit, don't scare me like that.'' He then looked at the mess he had created and scratched the back of his neck. ''Uh...I was trying to make breakfast.''

You looked at him, still devoid of words before bursting out laughing.

''And you managed to burn eggs? How do you even burn eggs ?''

You shook your head taking the pan out of his and putting it in the sink.

''What I am going to do with your Miles.''

He pouted following closely behind you like a lost puppy.

''It's the meaning that matters ?''

You glared at him before seeing the opened bag of flour next to you. You smirked before grabbing some and throwing it in his face.

''Hey !''

He retaliated by taking the closest thing to him, which was a raw egg and throwing it on your shirt.

A gasp was heard.

''You did not just do that.''

''Oh, I did. ''

Soon, it turned into a food war, and your enjoyment could be heard by the mix of yells and laughers coming from the kitchen. Out of nowhere, Miles caught the back of your thighs and sat you on the table, before resting between your legs.

''Caught you.''

You laughed gaily, before getting closer to his face with a raised eyebrow.

''What do you want champion? A kiss as a price ?''

Yet, instead of joking back as you expected, the boy only gulped. That's when you noticed the small space separating both of your faces. 

You liked your lips, anxious at his silence and his eyes followed your tongue before slowly travelling back to your nose and your eyelashes. He then closed his eye and shook his head to compose himself.

''The stuff you make me think, preciosa.''

Your mouth dried out at his words and you bit your lips.

''Like what ?''

''I can't say it.''

He averted his eyes from you once again but you stopped him before he could lean away.

''Then show me,'' you whispered.

He widened his eyes as his breath brushed against your lips. You saw as he tried to hold himself back but the intense burning in his eyes showed you that he wanted exactly what you wanted.

''Fuck it.''

He leaned down and crashed his lips onto yours and you automatically responded, sighing in delight.

Finally.

Your lips moved in synchronization and you felt euphoric. After a few seconds, he leaned away, his dark eyes travelling onto your face as if he wanted to capture to moment and carve it in his mind forever.

''You don't know how much I've wanted this."

''Me too,'' you whispered before your mouths found each other again.

You kissed and kissed. For how long, you didn't know. But all you knew is that it felt too good and it only felt like a few seconds before you separated again.

Miles licked his lips and let out a breath.

''That was -wow.''

''Yeah...'' you whispered trying to catch your breath, a bit dazzled by what had just happened.

''I made you this breathless already,'' he laughed before you punched him on the shoulder.

''Shut up !''

He laughed and wrapped his arms around your waist.

''I would love to kiss you more, but I think we need to clean this up first.''

You followed his eyes and noticed the mess you two had created.

''Yeah...''

He carried you back on the floor and you two got to work. Eventually, you realized you needed more cleaning products and you went to the store while he continued cleaning.

On the way, you kept touching your lower lip with a stupid smile stuck on your face. Miles made you feel all sorts of things and infatuation was the main one. You were already excited to get back home and continue the unfinished business.

The trip to get more cleaning products was fast and soon, you were back at your apartment.

But bliss goes away as fast as it comes, doesn't it ?

When you opened the door to your apartment to find that the living room was a mess. 

But not the mess you had left in the kitchen. 

A people having a physical fight kind of a mess. The armchair was knocked down, the table was broken and the pillows were ripped. 

''Miles ?'' you yelled but received no answer.

Your heart raced as you rushed to look in the different rooms of your home, but there wasn't any living soul.

What the heck was happening?

When you arrived in your room, there was still no one.

But as you were going back to the kitchen, something caught your attention from the corner of your eye. It was a note on your window. 

Exactly like the one your ex used to leave.

From afar, you could even recognize his writing. You snatched it and for the first time, you decided to read it.

Your heart sank at the words.

''I warned you.''

Don't hesitate to comment or reblog, I read everything <33

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[d0youc0py]

You had spent the night in your car. You hoped by now he had sobered up. Hell, he was probably still asleep. The sun was rising, not that you enjoyed its pale blue color. Your eyes throbbed. You had barely slept, and while you were awake you did nothing but cry.

You turned your car on.

You didn’t want to go back. He could still be drinking. He could be passed out in the living room. He could be out looking for you. He could not care at all. You didn’t believe that last one. You knew without a doubt Simon loved you more than anything. Last night was the first time he’d ever shown you something different. You hoped he was worried. Pacing the floor. Wondering what the hell he did last night. Buckling your seatbelt you headed back to your shared flat, with no clue what was in store for you- but you knew one thing: he was going to have to work hard to make it up to you.

•••••••••••••••••

You had barely opened the door before he was on you. His knees hitting the ground with a loud thump, two powerful arms gripping your waist. His hands clawed at the back of your shirt, pressing you suffocatingly close to him.

Your exterior was already faltering. You stopped your hands from digging in his hair, telling him you forgave him- but yell at him to never do it again. He was mumbling into your stomach. You maneuvered the both of you so you could get the door shut.

“Simon?” You questioned slowly. You couldn’t understand a word, or see his face. Your shirt began to feel wet. His whole body was quivering as he dug himself closer to you. He pulled his mouth away from your stomach, but you were still only able to catch every other word. You sighed and cupped his face in your hands forcing him to look at you.

You winced as a sharp pain stabbed you right in the heart.

He looked worse than you’d hope. You thought you’d take a little joy from it- seeing him feel bad. You were wrong.

His molten eyes were bright red and swollen. His pale face covered in red splotches from crying. He had rubbed his jaw completely raw, something he did when he was upset. You wiped a tear away from his eyes. They instantly closed craving any scrap of comfort you wanted to give him.

“Where’d you go?” You murmured, craning your neck down closer to him. He furrowed his brows at your question. He’d been here, getting shitfaced. Then it dawned on him. You meant Simon. After a year of dating he opened up to you a little more about his “alter ego”- Ghost. When Simon had been acting the way he was a part of you wondered if maybe you had been dealing with Ghost.

“You know I can’t tell you.” He choked.

“It had to be pretty bad for you to come home and treat me the way you did though.” You tried your best to keep your tone cold. He whimpered, but nodded his head agreeing with you. “Treating me like I didn’t even exist- then having the audacity to get drunk and yell at me. Do you know how scary that was for me? How would you like a 6’4, two hundred and fifty pound man- in an obviously bad headspace, drunk, yelling at you? You scared me Simon Riley and I don’t know how long it will take for me to trust you again.” You felt lighter getting that off your chest. The weight was quickly replaced by Simon curling himself around you. His sobs shook your whole body, and you fought against gravity to stay upright. You lost that battle, your body tumbling into his lap. He made quickly work of tangling both of you together, resting his cheek against the top of your head.

This was the most excruciating experience of his life. He didn’t sleep last night either, even in his drunken state he knew he’d messed up. After you left he stumbled off the couch and grabbed a few pieces of bread and shoved them down his throat. He grabbed any item containing alcohol and dumped it down the drain, throwing it straight in the trash. He tried calling you, you had left your phone on the counter. This was his worst nightmare. He had acted like his father.

He pleaded for your forgiveness against your head. He didn’t know how to make it better. All he could do was hope that you saw how truly sorry he was. How his heart was twisting so painfully in his chest that he’d had a grimace on his face for the past six hours. “How can I fix it.” He murmured. His sobs had calmed down after you caved and started rubbing his back.

“I don’t know Si.” You mumbled. His grip on you tightened. “I think you should figure that out.”

He did figure it out. It took about a month for the two of you to get back to normal. He made a point to never drink while he was home- only drinking one or two drinks after a mission if he really needed it. In the future when you two fought he made sure to control his volume and temper- stepping away from the argument if he felt he was going to scare you. More importantly though he started to see a therapist and became much more open with you about his life before you. He will always put in the work for you.

You could barely hear your name being shouted over the heartbeat in your ears. It wasn’t until a hand wrapped around your arm did you become aware of your surroundings.

“Fuck off.” You shouted tugging your arm away from Johnny.

“Bonnie please.” He begged, pulling you back towards him. He felt sick to him stomach. Your terrified voice ringing in his ears as he pressed the accelerator. The fat tears rolling down your cheeks, your chest heaving up and down. He’s had more than enough panic attacks to know one when he sees one. You gripped the wall for support your other hand pushing roughly at his chest. His heart clenched as he realized you wanted absolutely nothing to do with him. “Bonnie.” He tried again. Your breathing was so ragged he was surprised you were still conscious. “Sit down with me, please.” His voice was so soft, like he was trying to not scare off a deer. He sunk down slowly, his hands pulling you down with him. You put your legs between the two of you, resting your heated head on the cold brick of the building. You grabbed his wrists and threw his hands off of you.

He couldn’t hold back a tear any longer, his throat constricting so tight he knew it would be sore tomorrow. He quickly wiped it away. He didn’t deserve to feel sorry for himself. He’d put you- the most precious thing in his life- in danger. He deserved whatever punishment you had in mind for him.

You began to feel lightheaded. You shut your eyes, focusing hard on calming your breathing down. People walked past you- assuming the two of you had gotten a little too plastered.

“How could you do that to me.” You whispered finally. You opened your eyes and took in the sight of him. He was trying his hardest not to break down. The veins in his neck becoming more prominent.

“I was mad. You laughed at that bastards joke and it hurt me. If someone was poking fun at you I wouldn’t laugh along with them.” He tried to reason.

“So you thought almost killing us was the right way to go about it?” You snapped. Another tear fell from his eye. Usually the sight would absolutely break you, but you were so mad at him you hardly noticed it.

He didn’t know how to respond.

“We wouldn’t have died.” He assured. He had no way of knowing that and the crack in his voice made it obvious he knew that too.“I’m sorry, Bonnie.” He rose his head to look at you. He shivered as you looked at him with cold eyes.

“You wanted to scare me Johnny. You wanted to get back at me for making you feel bad. I’m sorry I laughed at his jokes- I’ll admit that wasn’t a kind thing to do. It sure as hell doesn’t excuse what you did though. How am I ever suppose to trust you again?” This was the man you wanted to spend the rest of your life with. Now you were wondering if his impulse would kill you one day.

“Let me make it up to you.” He said quickly. “All I ask for is one more chance. I’ll do anything for you, sweetheart and I know it doesn’t feel like it right now but you’re the most important thing to me. Please let me fix this.” He pleaded to you. The sincerity so evident in his eyes chipped at your cold heart. You stared at him for a long moment waiting for any falter. To see if this was just some facade. As the silence grew his gaze became more panicked- more heartbroken.

“One more chance Johnny.” You agreed. You could feel the weight of worry leaving his body. He was about to throw his arms around you but stopped himself.

“I’ll make it up to you, Sweetheart. I promise.” He swore. He did in fact, keep his promise. He never let his temper get the best of him again and completely changed his communication style, making sure he was always open and honest with you about the way he was feeling.

If you asked anyone what Captain John Price was most proud of in his whole life, they knew without a doubt his answer would have something to do with you. He took such pride in you and his relationship with you. He lived off of the way you looked at him. The way he was able to keep that lovestruck glint in your eye no matter how long the two of you had been together. He reveled in the feelings he got when someone asked him how he was able to keep someone like you so infatuated with him. He couldn’t help but puff his chest when someone came to him for relationship advice, because there was one thing no one could ever deny:

John Price was a fantastic Husband.

He was a fantastic husband.

That night changed everything. He took the easy way out. Leaving an ‘I’m sorry’ note on the fridge before he left for three months. The first week he was away he had the chance to call you. Pour his heart out, beg you for forgiveness. Remind you how much he loves you. How he would kill and be killed for you in a heartbeat. Yet he just stood there. Staring at the small burner phone in his shaking palm.

He hated himself enough for the both of you.

Everyone quickly noticed the shift. The always present loveglow he had was completely gone. He was a ghostly color- besides the red the that never left his eyes. He was completely dead. Only speaking to bark something out. They didn’t know the pain he was in. His heart constantly constricting in his chest. He wasn’t able to sleep because all he could think about was the sobs that left your body that night. He could hear them all the way from the living room. The look of complete and utter heartbreak as you watch the love of your life beat you down with words. He had shattered your world completely. He knew the comfort you found in him. He was a natural protector and he scared you more than anyone ever had. It was the most torturous experience of his life. Yet all he did was sit there and let silent tears roll down his face.

He hated himself enough for the both of you.

He had become a menace on the field. If anyone had forget why the man was Captain- they had sure been reminded. Talks of a promotion lingered in the air but he could care less. He wasn’t John Price anymore.

Hence why no one argued with him when he demanded to be taken back to you. He had been shot. Three times. He stayed still enough to receive some treatment, but he couldn’t be away from you. Not now. He couldn’t die thinking you hated him. He couldn’t have shame be the last emotion he felt for you. He couldn’t have his name written proudly on a tombstone, because if you didn’t want his last name anymore- he didn’t want it either.

He managed to convince one of the new rookies to fly him to home base. He jumped into his truck and sped as fast as he could to you.

A familiar pair of headlights shining into the bedroom window woke you up.

It couldn’t be. He had only been gone for a little more than six weeks. The front door opened, followed by your name being shouted. You tore off the covers. The sight of him alone was enough to make you sob.

“John.” You whimpered. He tugged you against him. Your mind was spinning. He was here, covered head to toe in blood, sweat, and tears, pressing quick hard kisses anywhere he could reach.

“I’m sorry. I’m so sorry.” He repeated over and over against your skin. He knew he would have to work hard to get back to where you two were. To get that same lovestruck glint back in your eye. He could do it. The way you pressed yourself closer to him gave him some hope. Hope that he could one day, become a fantastic husband again.

“Can we talk.” You we’re just about to fall asleep when the words struck through the air. You rubbed your sore eyes nodding. The living room light flickered on and you sat up. You decided it was best for you to sleep on the couch tonight. Give each of you time to think and cool down. Looks like Konig was done. The couch squeaked uncomfortably at the newly added weight. “I did some research and I realized that the way I acted towards you wasn’t normal.” He said softly. His eyes met yours and all doubt slipped from your mind. He knew it wasn’t right. And he was sorry.

To Konig the world was very black and white. You either fought or took flight- he was choosing to fight. He knew he needed to change. He would die if you ended up resenting him. He was going to fight for this relationship by changing the way his brain worked- and he prayed that you didn’t already choose flight.

You scooted closer to him, your hand resting on his shoulder. You could feel his tense muscles relax under your touch. He leaned into you. Before you knew it you were both laying on the couch, your body nuzzled into his wide chest.

“I’m sorry I acted like that, Schatz.” He ran a huge Hand up and down your back. “I’m still so new to this. I just want you all to myself.”

“I know Konnie.” You smiled, pressing a kiss against his lips. “There are times I want you all to myself too. It’s natural to want to be close to what you love. Just try to remember I love you more than anything.” His face flushed and you snickered at the wide smile spread across his face. “I’m sorry for what I said too, Konnie. That was uncalled for.”

“No you’re right. Its true I’m not the most popular person, but I’m happy with my friends at work and of course you. I don’t really need anything else.” He sighed. “Does this mean you’ll come to bed now?” He questioned. You nodded your head rapidly, already feeling a crick in your neck.

Part one here

I just want to thank everyone for the support on this little mini series! Some of you had asked for alternative endings and I’ll have those out soon! Thank you for your patience!

[baronessvonglitter]

Law of Attraction ~ Chapter 2

Rom Com AU divorce lawyer!Dave York x fem!Reader (featuring nightclub owner! Javier Peña)

Word count: 1,736

Summary: After reflecting on the ups and (mostly) downs of your relationship with Javier, you make a decision about your future.

WARNINGS: 18+ Only! Explicit for allusions to smut. Mention of selling drugs (Javi). Mentions of past infidelities (Javi again). Mention of illegal activities going on in Javi's club. Threats towards Javier. Basically Javier Pena is a walking red flag but reader was in love.

Author's note: this is basically just backstory on how reader and Javi got together. Dave makes an appearance at the end. Also, big love to everyone who's taken the time to read/reblog, or leave a nice little comment. 💜

Series Masterlist

I told you so.

That's the phrase booming through every thought in your brain as you try to come to terms with Javi's infidelity.

And it wasn't even the first time. You could kick yourself for being so trusting and so blind.

From the moment you'd met Javier Pena, who sold drugs to your friends behind the football field bleachers during your senior year of high school, you'd fallen for his bad boy persona. Motorcycle, leather jacket, aviators, cigarette resting between pouty lips, perfectly groomed mustache. He looked like the saxophone solo from "Careless Whisper".

He'd graduated six years ahead of you, and still came around campus, a legend in his own mind. That should have been your first red flag.

But out of all the girls who flirted with him, you were the one he wanted.

He'd whisked you away on his motorcycle, bringing you home so late that your parents forbade you from seeing him. But nothing could stop true love, that's what you had with him. Javier saw you, made you feel seen. He listened to you, big brown eyes studying your every feature, compelling you to kiss him, to do things you ordinarily wouldn't have.

You were engaged right after you graduated, much to the consternation of your family. But when your engagement seemed to go on and on without an actual wedding date in sight, you had your doubts that he really wanted to marry you.

After giving him an ultimatum which led to Javi telling you he wanted to wait another few years to actually tie the knot, you'd separated from him, giving back his ring, crying yourself to sleep as your mom or your sister would make their best attempts at soothing you. Seeing him with other girls - a different one riding behind him on his motorcycle each time - during those separations only further broke your heart. You found out you weren't so special after all.

But he always came back, always smooth talked his way to your too-good heart. And you let him back in, grateful for his kisses again, grateful for the way his body molded to yours, the splay of his hands across your hips as he bent you over and fucked his way back into your life.

The wedding, when it finally happened, went by in such a blur-- the two of you at the county courthouse, Javi in his best suit, bolo tie and new shiny boots, you in a simple lacy white dress you'd found at a consignment store, tailored to your measurements, and flowers in your hair. Javi had whjisked you away right after the ceremony, unceremoniously fucking you in the backseat of your car.

You'd always wanted kids, your maternal instinct going haywire any time any of your friends announced they were pregnant. You'd run your fingers longingly along the wooden cribs and quilted blankets on display at Target. It felt like the end of the world when Javi admitted he couldn't give you any children. His 'family visit to South Texas' just a couple months after your marriage was actually him recuperating after his vasectomy. You'd nearly left him then, deeply hurt by his secrecy and betrayal, but considered that you could make him change his mind one day, and he'd have it reversed.

A married man, he wanted to rely on steady income to support you besides selling weed and adderall to high schoolers. One thing he was good at was showing people a good time. He had his heart set on opening a strip club, but when you vehemently refused to stay married to him if he did just that, he set his sights on the next best thing and bought out an old roller rink with the help of his lifelong buddy Steve Murphy and renovated it into a nightclub.

His purchase of the club drained any savings you'd amassed in the first few years of your marriage, and you only saw a return on the investment once he'd promoted every night, made deals with shady people, allowed a few illegal gambling, drug, and prostitution outfits to operate within the walls of his new sanctuary. You looked the other way, only able to stomach the idea of being okay with it when Javi offered to buy you your own small business.

All your life you loved two things: baking and literature. Fresh croissants over the latest Janet Evanovich, homemade chocolates and The Great Gatsby. Ever the businessman, Javi talked you into creating your own business, gifting you the seed money to open Fiction & Frosting more expeditiously than you were comfortable with, mainly because you knew just where the funds for your business were coming from.

Planning and decorating had been the fun part to get you away from that thinking. You made the place your own, with your stylistic touches and smooth melodies to play over the ambience. You handpicked the titles that went into your store, including New York Times bestsellers along with lesser known authors and self-published works. Meet and greets were held, helping to gain traction when well-known authors were brought in to do press for their latest releases and for up and coming writers to display their own works.

You were proud of your own business, and eventually made enough money to pay Javier back for his investment. But even though your conscience was clean, your problems weren't necessarily over.

With Javi at the club most nights, you were lonely. It would be near dawn when he'd come home, stinking of cigarettes and alcohol, and, occasionally, another woman's perfume. And still he'd curl up next to you, kissing your neck as if nothing was wrong, spooning you so you could feel his bulging erection through your pajamas.

You'd stayed away, hoping to keep separate the Javi you loved and the Javi you knew had a business to maintain. But one night in particular your curiosity got the best of you and you found yourself driving to the club close to closing time.

The interior, tacky red and orange lighting that gave you the feeling of entering Hell, glowed with an intimidating glare as you looked around for your husband. Music blared from the DJ booth. The bartender on duty gave you vague answers as to Javi's whereabouts, but Steve was there, nursing a glass of Stoli. He coolly informed you Javi was in his office, and you chose to ignore the wry little smile on his face.

The closer you got to his office in the back, the more muffled the music got. But that only served to make louder the pounding of your heart, booming in your ears.

Seeing him at his desk with a woman on her knees, bobbing her head up and down enthusiastically was not what you expected to find. You immediately ran away, tears streaming down your face as you went out the back alley, slumped against the wall, defeated and heartbroken. When Javi found you, apologizing and telling you she didn't mean anything to him, you pushed him away, cursed him, wanted to kill him.

But Javi was Javi, and despite the way he broke your heart so many times, you couldn't make yourself stop loving him. And so you made the choice to believe him, to hug him, to keep from leaving him.

You think about that night now that you're actually leaving him.

Like a bird with a broken wing you go straight to your parents' house, and they invite you in without a second thought, holding in their own 'I told you so's' until you repudiate Javier yourself, recounting every time he 'interviewed' for bottle girls, groped a waitress, or lied about any little thing. You shine the light on his villainy, and in your hurt and angst, it feels good. You leave out the parts about the illegal activities.. it's already too much to tell them of his more hurtful iniquities.

"He never deserved you, sweetheart, I knew it from the beginning," your father says to comfort you.

"He made a pass at me last Thanksgiving," your younger sister says.

"He made a pass at me on Mother's Day," your mom says.

You shake your head, hating everything that you're hearing. But you force yourself to face the facts you've been avoiding for so long.

Your dad and brother go with you to get your things, providing a buffer between you and Javier, who's begging you to come back. He looks bedraggled, unshaven and unkempt, so unlike the put-together man you've come to know. You don't have the heart to meet his eyes, only gaining some satisfaction when your brother shields you from him while your dad helps carry your stuff out to his truck. It's the only bright spot in your day when they threaten to beat the ever-loving shit out of him if he dares to come near you again. You've never seen Javier scared until that moment.

You're so strong, your family commends you as you as you find a small place to rent, making your split official.

Your first night alone, after your sister has left and you're tidying up, putting away the washed wine glasses, you remember Dave.

In all the hubbub of the messy end of your marriage, you think of the divorce attorney, and you grab his card from your purse.

David L. York, Divorce & Family Law

The next morning you call and are put through to his direct line. Hearing his voice over the phone, so professional and yet warm, brings you back to that day you met him, and you feel a sensation of butterflies in your stomach.

"It's me," you give him your name and he remembers you immediately, bringing a smile to your face for the first time in days.

"I've been by a few times for coffee but I haven't seen you there," he says with some concern, and the butterflies multiply when you realize he'd actually sought you out.

"I've been busy," you make a lame excuse. "And not feeling very well."

"Oh," he replies. "Which is it? Busy or not feeling well?" he teases.

"Considering what I'm about to tell you.. both."

"What's going on? What can I do for you?" he asks, as if he'd do anything at all you ask.

"Oh, I heard you handle divorces. And I'd like to hire you to do mine."

dividers by @strangergraphics & @saradika-graphics 👑

taglist: @penascigarette @joelalorian @la-vie-est-une-fleur29

@darkheartgatita @speaktothehandpeasants @rav3n-pascal22

@vickie5446 @eviispunk @mrs-pedro-pascal @zascal

@sunnytuliptime @mysticsuitcasealmondwombat @joelmillerisapunk

@almostfoxglove @itwasntimethatdidit40 @604to647

@milla-frenchy @everybodylovedcontractors

[swiss-mrs]

Can you write a second chance a love with SY. He and reader were exes and tension has built up where he can’t help but kiss you and profess that he still misses you. Thanks!

Second Chances

Captain Syverson x GN!Reader

Word Count: 4.4k

Warnings: Mentions of Failed (Military) Relationships, Mentions of Fighting/Regretted Words Exchanged, Slight Sexism/Toxic Masculinity/Trad Views, Self-Doubt, Slight Depression, Sy is Able to Lift Reader, Angst with Happy Ending (As Requested)

Reader/Unnamed OC Description: No Physical Descriptions, No Mentions of Race, Height, Weight, Ethnicity, Etc., Age is 25+, Sy is 35+, No Use of Y/N, Only You/Your Pronouns, Mentioned as “darling" and "beautiful", otherwise gender neutral.

Life is… fine. Wake up. Go to work. Come back home to your apartment. Eat. Sleep. Repeat. There wasn't really anything to complain about, but there was a notable loss. The only thing is now you're just used to it.

In the beginning, it was always the little things, someone passing with a similar cologne, a specific food brand at the grocery store, a familiar street you no longer pass by as often. Eventually, the watery eyes tamed to a pang in your chest. Now, it's all just numbness. Even with friends, your smile makes appearances again, but the happiness doesn't quite reach your eyes the way it used to. It's been so long, they just stopped mentioning it, but you still notice the occasional pity look.

It's a crazy thing to think about how you've lived more of your life without him than you have with him, but that doesn't lessen the effect.

You'd survived your childhood, your teenage years, and early twenty-something without him. After meeting the most handsome man you'd ever laid eyes on, you'd be foolish not to reciprocate his advances. Though you shortly had your skepticism after finding out his occupation, he was quick to assure you he was no quick trip, and ultimately, you caved.

And he for sure had you, for years in fact. He had you completely believing every one of his ‘I love you's and ‘forever's, yet here you are, missing the way he'd fill up the space in your life.

You'd had a life before him, a decently fulfilling, single life until he showed up and screwed that all up. He wasn't necessarily your first ‘love’, but he was definitely your first ‘true love’. And, now, you were feeling the effects of that loss.

The first thing that hit you after your split with Sy was anger, pure reactivity to how everything ended. How dare he call you ‘too much’. How dare he try to pull the whole ‘you signed up for this’ bullshit. He had the audacity to make every problem your problem. Fuck him for making your ‘forever’ just another failed military love that should've known better.

You were soon to block him, not wanting to hear any of his ‘I'm sorry's or ‘can we talk's. You'd already talked, talked a little too much. You were done. ‘Let it die’ was your mantra for months. He ruined you, had you looking in the mirror different. You couldn't talk to anyone, express yourself, ask for help, be vulnerable without seeing it as annoying, dramatic, ‘too much’. Maybe, it was just you?

You took it upon yourself to change, distance yourself, drift away. Was it just you? No one made a comment about how they suddenly heard from you less. Were you really too much?

For a long while, you wished he'd cheated, abused, something, anything to make you hate him. Could you really hate him for it? You didn't work out. That's not his fault. He didn't understand you, and a couple of rude words weren't nearly enough to hate him. He was ultimately a good guy. He was never unfaithful, never would even dare to think of laying a hand on you, but when it was all said and done, he was a bit neglectful. But, how much of that was him, and how much of it was his job? Oftentimes, it was hard to distinguish. Too often was it an excuse.

Did he love you? sure. Could he have loved more? yes. Too often did it feel like he was one-sided. You were there for him, not the other way around. You are his, not the other way around. You needed him, not the other way around. And to have that shoved back in your face when you brought it up was not the right reaction. He shouldn't feel like an animal cornered when you brought up a concern, something he did that hurt you, but he did. A valid point shouldn't be shot down or argued with counterpoint, but it was. Now, you can only second guess yourself, and that shouldn't be how it is, but it is.

You loved too hard, that will haunt you. He loved too little, and that will forever haunt him.

He hated himself. You were everything he ever prayed for, a beautiful partner with a beautiful smile and a beautiful soul, someone he could have forever. He didn't realize that the thought of ‘having someone’ was wrong of him. He was selfish. You never did anything but show him your heart, your mind, and he blew it up in your face. He destroyed something, someone so beautiful. A day hasn't passed that he wasn't filled with regret. He couldn't even smile or laugh anymore. He became scary.

He'd lost the one piece of true happiness in his life, and it was his fault.

He craved you. He needed you, but he was too late. Why couldn't he have realized what he had sooner? Appreciate you like you deserve. Love you like you deserve. He knows he has it in him, but he just couldn't. fucking. see. it. He wants to kick his own ass for it. He desperately wants to turn back time, go back with the mindset he has now, or at least beat it into his past self.

He'd gotten too damn comfortable being in the military. Vulnerability is weakness. Why would he use his words? Why think about anything, decode? Feelings are best buried. He's a man's-man, and a man only needs to protect and provide

He believed that ideology never gave him issues until you. You challenged that ideal. You asked him for his thoughts, his feelings. You wanted to know. You cared. It annoyed him. Why the fuck would he care? Sure he had thoughts and feelings somewhere, but he pushed them down. Why bring them back up? You surely had too much time on your hands to be concerned with what he was thinking. You wanted connection. He knows that now, but what is that going to do for him now?

He immediately felt the effects of your absence. He was deployed when you left your shared home. He watched you leave on the security camera, car packed to the brim. Sure, he had felt a type of way about it then, but then he was only apologizing for the sake of it. He was just another man in the wrong. Apologize to your upset partner, make up, and move on, but oh, was it so much more different now.

He was filed to the brim with remorse. Even then, he had visions of your shared future, retiring or climbing ranks to settle in one place, building a family, a home, preferably on a large, secluded plot of land. How he looks on with different eyes at that ‘future’ now. He never truly believed in all that ‘grass is greener’ ‘know what you have ‘til it's gone’ B.S. until he'd lost you. He gets it now.

It wasn't until that switch was flipped for him to realize you blocked him, excommunicated. He was gone so much that he never got a chance to build any sort of relationship with your friends. It irritates him now that he is probably known as just the shitty military ex. The closest thing he has to you is a friend of a friend of his who is a friend of a friend of yours. At first, he'd rather die than try to reach out to you that way, but now, there was no line, no bridge he wouldn't cross to just get one more moment with you.

He'd been stewing on it for the last year and a half. You'd moved and blocked him. It seemed utterly hopeless to reconnect, but something came up recently that has him itching again.

He's been promoted. A good job, good position, and in one place. It was perfect. The start of your ‘forever’ together. The only thing missing is you. Friend of a friend² be damned. He had to fix this, and just his luck to find you. Just your luck to be found.

It took several minutes for you to lay eyes on him, but he spotted you immediately. The second you walked through the door of your new favorite café, he saw you. He couldn't believe it. He originally pulled himself into this place because it simply reminded him of you. It had you written all over it. He felt closer to you here. He wouldn't have guessed you would just walk in like this. His eyes followed you as you stood in line and ordered.

He noticed you glance around the café briefly and still not spot him seated at a back table facing the exit. His heart raced, seeing your eyes wander before going to your phone. He knew that look, though. You were only fidgeting with it, trying to make yourself look busy to avoid any social awkwardness. It made him grin as he stared longingly. There were some things that didn't change.

It had been a whole two years since you last saw Sy, about eight months since you stopped seeing him in every stranger. You weren't going to back track now, so you stared down blankly at your phone to keep yourself from staring at the familiar looking guy in the corner. He was missing a thick beard and a shaved head, but with a quick glance, he looked an awful lot like heartbreak.

Sy knew he was on borrowed time, the chances of you sitting alone in any kind of restaurant was slim to none, and considering you weren't looking for seating meant you were grabbing and going. He had to think of something and fast.

His body was standing, and his feet were moving before his mind could catch up. It wasn't until he was about two feet away that he stopped and started panicking. You noticed the man standing in your peripheral, but you kept your head down to avoid any awkward eye contact. That was until your name fell from his lips, causing you to look up from your phone.

“Sy?” Your eyes widened and your brows furrowed together. Your heart immediately started blasting in your ears. You couldn't breathe. You'd thought about running into him again, about all you wanted to say to him, telling him off? apologizing? But that was before your move, before you forced him out of your mind. Now, you were face to face with your anxiety and dreaded nightmare. Your name was muffled from his mouth and to your ears the second time.

“Hi. How have you been?” He wanted to punch himself in the face for how casual that came out, but he quite honestly couldn't think of anything better to say without falling over his own words. He awaited a response from you, but you only stared like a deer in headlights.

You genuinely couldn't hear a word coming out of his mouth. Was he talking? He had to have been. His mouth was moving, but it was like his voice was muffled. Something you assume was your name came out again before your name was called a bit louder by a different voice behind you.

You whip your head around to find a perky barista with a drink in hand, looking in your direction. You scurry over to her and take your drink with a curt thank you, as polite as you can muster in this moment. Without even a second glance, you're making a rushed escape for the exit. Your name is called again, but you're tunnel visioned on the door out.

Sy's stomach tightens and drops at the sight of your flee, but again his body is in full control at this point. He's utterly in shock. He didn't know what to expect, but this was his chance. All he knew is that he couldn't let you leave, not again, so this time, he chased after you.

As soon as you're out the door, he's right behind you, having to catch the door from slamming on him. He calls out for you again, but you don't stop, so he keeps running.

It's once you're passed the café windows that he finally catches up. He reaches to grab for your arm but quickly changes his mind to just step in front of you instead. “Wait! Please, darlin’, wa-”

“Don't call me that.” He's taken aback by the sudden words but retracts nonetheless.

“Please. Wait.” It was at this point that you both have fallen silent that you get a good look at him. His hair has grown out of its ‘tactical buzzcut’ and into a pretty generic cut that was redeemed by the dark curls atop his head. His beard was now trimmed down to only some scruff and a mustache. It was an odd combination of seeing him with more and less hair than usual, but he was just as handsome as ever, unfortunately.

The pause between you both was long. Though it should be awkward, it was also strangely comfortable or rather empty. Being in each other's presence again was like putting on an old hoodie. It was cathartic and familiar, but the memories, the history, was hard to get passed. Your name falls from his lips again, a lot softer and barely there. Your eyes were trained on his face, unable to look away. His were downcast.

“I… I….” His eyes close as he takes a deep breath in an attempt to gain some composure. His bottom lip juts out a bit as his mouth tightens into a little frown. “Please, I need to talk with you.” He opens his eyes, encapsulating your gaze in his.

The sight of his eyes outside of your memory is enough to empty your brain of any thought, so you remain silent. But he needs an answer from you, so he waits.

“What is there to talk about?” You say. He can tell by the look in your eyes that you built walls that weren't there before, and it shakes him to his core. He did that.

“A lot.” He sighs, huffing out a singular humorless laugh through his nose. His face briefly quirks like it wants to give a smile to match the short laugh, but the overwhelming weight of the situation at hand just won't allow for it.

You stare up at him for a few beats of silence, both of your chests tight with anxiety. You've never seen him so close to breaking down. He's never seen you so blank. Neither of you really knows what to do, but eventually, your eyes fall from his face before you walk passed him.

Sy freezes. The world around him simultaneously crumbles and halts. His breathing completely stills. You don't get five steps away before you turn back and call after him, “You want to talk. I'm not giving you another chance to do so.” You say, expecting him to follow you. As soon as the realization hits, he moves with haste. He's beside you walking before you're even done turning back around.

It was a good two blocks before Sy spoke up. “How have you been?” He tries again, looking over to you as you walk.

“Fine.” You answer curtly. It makes Sy frown again. It's the kind of ‘fine’ you'd give a stranger, and he hates that that's what you've become. He feels a bit shut down but continues. This is his chance.

“Well, that's, um, good to hear.” He states, but the end of the sentence inflicts an upward tone, almost into a question.

“I wasn't for a long time, but now, I'm fine.” You add, and it's the hardest punch in the gut Sy has ever received. His jaw clenched as he nodded. He swallows, trying to carefully choose his words, knowing how much each one counts.

“Darlin-” He cuts himself off by correcting it to your name. He sighs again, “Please, genuinely hear me when I express how sorry I am.”

“I'm sure you are.” He glosses over your response, continuing.

“Look, I know I've said it before, but, in all honesty, I didn't-” He cuts himself off again, making sure he words it correctly.

“Didn't mean it?” You finished, a bit annoyed.

“No.” He's quick to correct, “I meant it.” He says, determined, “I knew that I had made you upset, and I knew to apologize for it, but I didn't really know the meaning behind it.” He admits. “I didn't understand.” He confirms what you already know. “I was foolish. Stuck in an old way.” He pauses with another frown. “I didn't understand why you wanted to dig into me. I didn't understand that you were only trying to connect with me, really connect. I got defensive. ” He looks up from the ground to your eyes with a sad, guilty look, like he's confessing. “I was stupid and didn't believe in sharing every part of me with you.” He slows his pace, forcing you to match until you're stopped in front of him.

You're facing each other as he continues with his confession. “I thought doing so would make me less of a man, but I understand now.” He gives you a quick, little, sad smile before it disappears into a guilty frown. “I understand that it was an integral part of strengthening our bond, our love. You'd show me every part of you in return for me doing the same, and we'd accept each other, every part.” He gives another sad smile that breaks your heart all over again. He looks down shamefully with a hard look on his face, “I understand now.”

You look at him with a sad pout. Half of you wants to give him a piece of your mind. Two years!? It took all that time to just now fucking realize what you were asking of him!? But the other half didn't know how to feel. What is he trying to do? Redeem himself? What.

“So that's it? You just wanted to give me an actual apology?” He can see that your walls are still up. He fixes his jaw.

“Yes, but,” He starts. He knew that you weren't going to just fall into his arms, but he still hoped it would be that easy to just pick up where you left off. He sighs with his eyes closed, this time shakily, nervous. It confuses you as you've never seen the Captain Syverson nervous. “I've been…” He stops short, pausing. Jesus, you never thought you'd see the day this immovable mountain of a man revert to the demeanor of a reprehensible child. “I know we can't pick up where we left off, and I kind of don't want to,” He tries again, this time getting a confused and slightly offended expression from you, “but can we, maybe, start over?” He looks at you with the most hopeful, pitiful puppy eyes you've ever seen, another thing you never thought you'd see from him.

The air forcefully leaves your lungs as all the progress you've made through the years to try and make yourself impenetrable leaves with it. Your chest tightens as you try to will the upcoming tears away. It's your turn to let out a humorless laugh. You shake your head, looking off into the distance, “You really hurt me, Sy.” You look back at him with the most heartbreaking expression. He nearly looks close to tears at the sight. “I'm too much. I'm needy. I expect too much.”

“No, no, no.” He stops you, stepping closer only to get you retreating from him. Your step back drives the heartbreak further into his chest. He shakes his head in utter disagreement, a disgusted grimace on his features. “You're not. You're. not. I was foolish and childish, and I was not ready for you.”

“But you're ready now?” You interject in disbelief.

“Yes,” He states firmly without hesitation. He steps up again. This time, your body visibly tenses, but you don't move away. “I'm more than ready. I need you.” He takes another smaller, gentler step forward. “I hate that it took you leaving for me to see that, but I do.”

“Sy-”

“Please. Please. Don't say it's too late. Don't say we can't try again. Please, just one more chance.” He looks down abruptly like a private who just got caught looking at a superior officer. He's begging. He knows how he hurt you and your trust. Like a dog showing its belly, he's trying to show you his submission. Ultimately, it's in your hands, but he's determined.

You stare at him while trying to decipher the mess in your mind. “Sy.” You say a bit more calmly. His demeanor doesn't change. You sigh, “How do I know you wouldn't just fall back into old habits? What if, even after all this, you just repeat the same closed book bullshit? What's different?” You try to find his eyes, but they remain downcast as he stays still.

“I've been promoted.” He states a bit detached, purely stating fact, anything you want from him. “I'd no longer be in the field, no longer deployed. I'd be in one place.” He purses his lips into another right frown. “It's the start of what we used to talk about.” He says, words laced with hope and nostalgia. “Remember?” He tests, voice as soft as silk. Your eyes sadden even more, looking down with a miniscule nod. “I can settle down. Stop putting myself in the line of fire every day. I'd come home to you every night, wake up with you every mornin’.” His eyes soften as they peer up at you through his dark eyelashes. “Get that dream house.” He raises his brows with soft eyes and a sigh of a grin.

“Sy.” He quickly follows with your name before you continue. The gentle way your name rolls off his tongue makes your heart race at a concerning rate. “I,” you sigh, “I can't just run back to you after all this time.” You scoff out a sad laugh.

“So, let's just start with a date.” He tries again softly, melting your heart in your chest. “No pressure, no expectations, just one do-over.” His eyes flutter softly as his eyes return to their submissive downcast. “A reintroduction to the people we've become. A second first date.” He concludes. You can't help but let out a soft giggle despite trying to hold yourself together. Though it's sad, Sy has never heard a more beautiful sound. His chest swells with hope.

It takes time for you to make up your mind, and he gives it to you. Your everything was already screaming at you to say yes, but you couldn't let him know that, so you took your time. “Okay.” You cave. Sy's brows shoot up, and his face breaks out into a huge, mouth agape smile. The image of pure, overjoyed surprise.

He can't help himself but close the distance between you and scoop you in his arms, twirling you around, with a victorious laugh. The shock of it all and contagious joy causes you to let out a small giggle. He looks up at you in his arms and drops you down enough to plant a kiss on your lips. Though quick, the kiss was filled with nothing but longing and love.

As if realizing what's happened, he's quick to gently set you back down and take a step back, returning to the same distance you were at prior. He is a bit awkward with his hands before setting them on his hips. He still has a bright smile on his face, “I,” he huffs, “You have no idea how you've just made me the happiest man to ever exist.” He tries to just quickly move passed what just happened. “So, could I, maybe, get your number?” He says, trying his best to contain his joy.

You laugh, admittedly a little awkward. “It's the same one.” You fidget, “I can, uh, I'll unblock you, as long as you have the same number as well, I mean.” You stumble. He nods.

“Yeah. Yeah, it's the same one.” He sighs, content. His eyes are filled with admiration and adoration, like you hung the moon and stars single handedly. It was everything you ever wanted from him to see his love within him.

You quickly pull your phone out and unblock his number on the spot. “There.” You shoot him a quick text. Even after all this time, his tagname never changed in your phone. You hear his phone ding moments later, and he pulls it out with an even brighter smile and a sigh of relief. He never thought he'd see your name pop up in his notifications again. Once again, it's always the little things that are missed.

“Are you free this weekend? Friday night, maybe?” He asks. You give him a small smile and a nod. “Great! Great, I'll- I'll pick you up? We can get dinner after work and…start over.” He sighs. He's both a little sad and over the moon. He wants nothing more than to do a quick catch-up and just start pouring his love into you, but hey, beggars can't be choosers. You give another small smile.

“I can't wait.” You say. He nods curtly. “You can tell me all about your new job.” His face brightens at you, showing interest in him again. He steps forward to stand beside you, holding out his elbow.

“Let me walk you to your car.” You breathe out a small chuckle before hooking your hand in his elbow, taking back to the café parking lot. Just a few paces in, Sy leans in closer to you to whisper in a low tone, “I know we're going to go slow, but I just want to say… I missed you.” You look into his deep blue eyes before looking down at his mustached lips.

“I've missed you too.” You whisper back with a small smile.

The remainder of the work week, Sy was notably different, even getting some teasing comments from coworkers. Your friends tried tearing into you, asking why you suddenly looked like the life returned in you, but you kept your lips sealed. You were taking things one step at a time with Sy.

The most anyone got was “I have a date.”

____

I hope you liked it! Thank you so much for the request, Anon! I hope I did it justice. (sorry it took so long. I've been a bit under the weather😅)

Masterlist

Swisslist (General Taglist): @rosecentury @solacedthistest

[leaawrites]

can u write about noel going all out for your one year anniversary, can u write it all romantic and fluffy.. im yearning for lover boy gallagher

Lover Boy Gallagher

Noel Gallagher x fem!reader

Summary: in which, Noel goes all out for their one year anniversary.

Warnings: a bit angst (sorry, can't help myself), swearing, established relationship, fluff, I hope this is how you imagined it!

Wordcount: 1.8k

Masterlist

The house was empty, like most days this time around. With the recording of their new album, all Oasis members were constantly in the studio and rarely anywhere else. Especially not home with their girlfriends or family.

At the beginning of their relationship, Y/n assured Noel that she was fine with being home alone and that her time without him wouldn’t change the love she felt for him. She promised him that exactly a year ago and still held it to this day. Falling for him a bit more with every longing touch they shared when he finally arrived back in their bed late at night. The nights falling short for them both, when they remembered that Noel had to be in the studio the next day and Y/n had a job of her own.

Even with the house being empty, she still tiptoed down the stairs towards the kitchen. For her, there were no expectations as to what Noel might’ve done for their anniversary, though she didn’t expect a lot. Maybe some flowers, a card at best. He was never the best at giving gifts, he knew what he wanted, but knowing what those around him wanted was most often not his strong suit, unless it was something were specific he’d see one day and just buy while waiting for the next opportunity to gift it to someone. If it wasn’t accidental or impulsive, it wouldn’t be much. The biggest present he gave her once for her birthday were a pair of shoes she’d wanted for quite some time already. He’d seen them in a store one day and bought them. Other times, it were just chocolates she’d receive from him.

Still, when she peaked into the living room and onto their dinner table, there was no trace that he even lived there, beside the usual empty coffee mugs or the shoes and coats at the front door. He hadn’t forgotten, had he? He surely hadn’t, Y/n tried to convince herself as she took the empty empty coffee mugs and put them in the sink to clean later. Settling on the sofa and turning the TV on, she thought back to what was hidden in her part of the closet, behind what seemed to be an endless row of dresses. One of them bought just for tonight. Maybe he’d take her out for dinner. A simple reservation could be made quickly with his connections, she thought.

She had noticed his absence, which seemed to be more apparent now than with the album before. Having been friends before, she knew how long he’d usually spent in the studio and how much time he used to spent with his other girlfriends. He was attentive at the beginning of their relationship, what would happen to them after already breaking apart in a year? How much further could they fall? She didn’t want to think about it, but in the quiet of their shared house, there was no around it at some point of the day. Were they truly meant to be like she always believed them to be? Was he truly the man worth fighting for even when her friends told her about all the amazing things their boyfriends - or even husbands - did for them, sacrificing their own time for them? Noel never gave a reason to doubt it, until she spent more time with the TV than him.

The world outside wore a dark grey over the usual green and blue blur of earth and sky. It looked like it might rain in an hour or so. Shutting off the TV, she made her way upstairs again. With a thicker sweater over her body to stay warm and her laptop in her lap, she started getting comfortable on the little patio they had, overlooking their garden and those beyond. She needed to clear her head even when she would freeze while doing so. Working from home was a privilege only the fewest had, but working as a journalist made it all a bit more available for her. The papers she took home from work laid next to her, held safely by an ashtray. Starting to type she started getting lost in the words and stories. Stories that weren’t her own completely, which made it easier to escape reality.

Only coming back once she heard his voice from behind, her fingers stopped typing and felt cold for the first time in two hours. The blood stopped pumping through them like it’d done before, circulating slower and making her hands shake.

“Are you fucking mental?” he asked her, taking the laptop from her lap and pulling her inside. “Are you trying to kill yourself outside in the cold?”

“It’s not even that bad,” she tried to tell him, though her argument was worthless the moment he took her freezing hands in his own, warming them up like he’d always do. Shaking his head he continued cursing her under his breath for behaving like that. ‘How can you do stuff this stupid?’ she could hear him muttering. ‘Scaring me like this.’

“I’m fine,” she tried to convince him once more, smiling in assurance and holding his face with her cold hands, making him shiver at the cold touch. Laughing at his reaction she fell into him, leaning closer and ultimately hugging him. Snuggling her face into his chest and sighing in contempt. “I missed you though.”

“I missed you too, love,” Noel said back, holding her close like he was afraid she’d slip away, into the cold again, leaving the warmth all to himself. What was warmth worth if you were lonely?

Angling her head up, she could see his () eyes already watching her, his eyebrows racing in question as he saw the uncertain look on her face. He’d always know whenever there was something on her mind and he never held her back from speaking her mind. Taking in a deep breath, she let out in a small voice, “You’re gone now more often than before.”

“I know, love.” His hand started rubbing up and down her lower back, heating her up. “But it will stop now, I promise.”

“But, you’re not done with the album yet, are you?”

“No, not yet.”

“Then why won’t you be gone for longer now?”

What was he doing instead? Y/n could feel her insides twist and turn. Churning in fear and exploding with anxiety building up inside of her. Her heart as racing, the beat quickening. If this was a song it would be played in the club, she was sure of it. The blood pumping through her quicker now but she felt colder than before.

What was he doing instead? The words repeated in her head, doubling every second into more question. But this one stayed in the front all the time. Hypothesis after hypothesis appearing in front of her inner eye, playing like a movie she wanted to turn off but couldn’t look away from. It was just too disturbing.

And Noel seemed to notice none of her feelings beside confusion.

“Needed to finish your gift.” Seeing her eyes widen like the movie finally ended, he only laughed at her reaction. “Don’t say you forgot what day it is.”

‘I thought you did,’ she wanted to say. “How could I forget the first time you talked to me with your back turned out of nervousness?” she said instead, bringing a blush to creep up his neck. Noel’s face hiding in the crook of her neck as he laughed in embarrassment just thinking about the situation that took place outside of a pub they were all at.

The two of them had been flirting for some time already, though neither wanted to put a label on what they were doing. With the surprising success of ‘Definitely, Maybe’ Y/n was thankful for even the smallest second she got to spent with two of her favourite people. As one could’ve seen coming from the beginning though, having less than something hurt more than having nothing, at least then she would’ve known where she was at. They both would’ve. Having to watch Y/n dance with some random guy over him and having Liam slur in his ear as to ‘how fucking childish’ he was behaving was the last straw for Noel and the reason why he found himself outside with Y/n by his side in the cold London streets. And then it all just happened. The words flew from his mouth like they’ve never done before, not even when writing songs, and after a long pause from the woman’s side, their lips finally touched in a way they’ve never done before. True passion and love being exchanged between them.

To her, he spoke poetry without thinking much about it.

A talent she hadn’t seen before. One she could never learn. So, listening to him making it feel so easy was an addiction she would never feel guilty of.

“You wanna open your present?” His words were muffled against the skin of her neck, where he laid little kisses for her. His lips travelling further up, over her jaw and cheek until they reached her lips.

“Yes.”

“Wait here,” he instructed her, losing his body from hers and walking back into the kitchen where he left it to go look for her the moment he came back. It wasn’t wrapped nicely, but Liam wanted to help so he let him.

When he came back, Y/n was sat on the sofa, hands clasped together like a child on Christmas. Excitement rushing through her veins. The present was a thin, poorly wrapped, square that was light in her hands. Scrunching her eyebrows together without a clue of what was in her hands, Noel urged her to open it, leaning on the cushion behind the headrest and watching her every move as she neatly loosened the tape from the wrapping material. Grasping the gift, she pulled it out, revealing a vinyl she’d never seen before. A simple white record sleeve over it with a message written on it. A message for her. ‘An apology for all the nights I’ve missed because of this,’ she read.

“What is it?” she asked, gently taking the record from the sleeve, separating them and letting the paper-like material drop to the cushion she sat on. Turning it, she read the tiles first, none of which she recognized, before reading the singer. Noel Gallagher.

Turning her head sharply his way she felt tears prick in her eyes. Mouth agape and her fingers holding the record tight to not drop it. Noel laughed at her reaction, the blush reappearing to his face. “All for you. All eight of them only for you.”

“You produced your own album?”

“Not mine. Ours.

“Nobody will ever hear this beside you, you know? These are just for you.”

[rotten-pomegranate]

Hiii thanks you very much for answering my ask🥹❤️

But can please I get one where they never find reader🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺

Yandere Adult trio and trouble trio when reader escapes and they never find her

First one here

Yes bbg

This is a bit short

Warnings: killing, yandere

𖥧𖥧𖥧𖥧𖥧𖥧𖥧𖥧𖥧𖥧𖥧𖥧𖥧𖥧𖥧𖥧𖥧𖥧𖥧𖥧𖥧𖥧𖥧𖥧𖥧𖥧𖥧𖥧𖥧𖥧𖥧𖥧𖥧

Feitan

Feitan is offended and pissed that you have the audacity to try and escape him

He’s gonna look for you for years and even after he stops looking he’s still gonna check from time to time if you’ve become brave enough to make a Facebook page or a snapchat account

Even if he knows you aren’t with them he’s gonna kill all the family and friends he didn’t already torture to death trying to find you

Phinks

Like in the last one phinks is heart broken, why was he not enough for you, he fed you, clothed you, made sure you had a comfortable place to sleep every night

He’s gonna low key go crazy the more time passes that he can’t find you and he might ask the troupe for help and if he still can’t find you and they all fail at finding you he’ll be forced to stop because of his mental health

He’s still gonna have some major heartache though, oh some random person that has the same hair colour as you asks him for help? They are getting punched so hard they won’t be recognizable, he sees the nail polish you used to wear in the store? He’s buying it all just so he can throw it away when he’s done smashing them all

Shalnark

Shalnark isn’t very good at showing his emotions but he is sad, not because you got away because he’s doubting himself and his abilities to kidnap someone

He’s buying pad locks and camera and motion detectors for weed before he starts looking for you, that’s probably good for you because it gives you time to get away

When he starts looking he doesn’t think it will take long but you actually did a good job at disappearing and he’s slowing getting more frustrated

He’ll try less but he’ll never stop looking for you so make sure to always cover your tracks well

Chrollo

Chrollos not that worried, he starts tracking you right away and because of that he probably gets close a few times which slowly starts to piss him off

When he can no longer find anything about you he involves shalnark to help and when he can’t find anything he’s having a whole troupe meeting about it

He’s never gonna fully stop looking and he’s never gonna get over the loss of you, he might try and replace you but it isn’t help so he’ll kill the innocent person in your place

Illumi

Illumi is gonna go bat shit crazy when he finds out you escaped, the whole house is gonna know the whole town below his house is gonna feel his bloodlust

He’s gonna have every family member, every dog, every maid and butler out looking for you so you gotta be speedy

Your best Bet is honestly going to another country if you can do that without leaving any footprints

He’s gonna replace you because his family says he has to but whoever comes after you doesn’t mean anything to him like you did

Hisoka

Hisoka is the calmest, he figured he’d find you in like a week because of his skills and hunter license but after a couple months pass he’s starts getting annoyed

He’s pushes other stuff aside at this point to fully focus on looking for you but when it hits the one year mark he pushes it to the back of his mind again

He still makes en effort from time to time but not as often, he is sad you left you where his favourite toy and he didn’t even get a chance to break you

©rotten-pomegranate- All rights reserved, don’t steal, translate, copy, plagiarize, claim my work as your own or post it on other platforms.

[night-daily]

It's always been you | Luke Castellan x Apollo! fem! reader

summary: It's Valentine's day at the half blood camp and you try to show your love for Luke but you aren't the only one who wants him.

warnings: not proof reading, sorry!

a/n: i know its not valentines anymore but its still february, so enjoy ;)

It's Valentine's day, finally. You've been waiting for this day to come since you stepped into the camp a half year ago and then got claimed as Apollo's children, which wasn't a full surprise, according to Luke, you fit just well at his cabin, you're an expert archer, a healer who always helps everyone and a great singer with the sweetest voice I've ever heard, you put to shame at anyone who thinks can sing. And since that moment, Luke stole your heart, well, not literally, of course, but sometimes you doubt that, why else you only feel alive when he's around you? or when one of his smiles is directed at you or when you hear his laugh and you're the cause of it.

So yeah, you were waiting Valentine's day just to confess your feelings to Luke, it was cliche but it was the perfect day at the same time, and to be honest, you couldn't wait another day.

You sealed the letter, keeping the contain in secret, a nervous giggle escaping from your mouth, “Today is the day, what can go wrong, right?”

“Luke will be a fool if he rejects you, and I don't think he will either, he looks at you with heart eyes, even a blind person can see it, so you don't have anything to worry about” One of your sisters gives you a quick hug before heading to the bathroom.

A sudden confidence runs through your body at her words, taking a deep breath and you walk out of your cabin to Luke's, holding carefully the letter in your hand.

As you walk, you see everyone rushing from side to side carrying flowers, cakes, even swords, so this is Valentine's at the camp, uh? Not so different from the exterior world.

You're finally a few steps from Luke's cabin, but apparently you're not the only one, there is a big crowd outside, waiting for something, no, someone.

what the f—

“If Luke keeps receiving more chocolates, he'd open a candy store for sure” A group of guys says at your side. You knew Luke was popular, and you expected that would be a few people aside you who will try to gain his heart, but damn, how could you compete with half of the camp? Why he would like your gift? Why he would choose you?

The confidence left your body, feeling defeated, you turned in your steps, and walked away not before glancing behind you, only to find more people arriving with gifts in their hands.

A bitter smile is on your face now, “It could be worse, I guess”

♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡

The rest of the day you felt irritated, seeing everyone so happy holding hands, exchanging gifts, or just talking to each other lovely, 'cause you were supposed to be doing all this stuff with Luke. Your friends noticed your change of humor but no one dared to say anything, and you were glad they didn't, you know the moment they asked you if you were okay, you'd cry. And that's the last thing you need right now.

Also, you were going to ignore Luke but it seemed the other way. Every time he tries to reach you, a group of girls will come out of nowhere and interrupt him, and being the nicest person you know, which is one of the things you love about him, he won't tell them to back off and that gives you time to leave without him noticing. At least that's what you thought.

The night before Valentine's, Luke barely slept, he spent half of the night, out of the camp, he went to the city when everyone was sleeping to get your gift. He was supposed to get it a week before but the store said they'll get new ones until February 13, so here he was.

He knew you'd like it, after all, he saw it in your eyes at the moment your gaze fell on that beautiful harp.

It was night, and you were walking to your cabin, you were tired after practicing with your arrow.

“Hey, wanna get out of the camp with me?” Your head turned faster than you anticipated at the sound of his voice reaching your ears, “Sure” You shrugged your shoulders, trying to act indifferent but to be honest, you'd follow Luke to the Tartarus without thinking, you trusted him with your whole life.

He extended his hand to you, an invitation, your heart beating faster, and you finally lied your hand on his. And then the two of you slipped through the forest, holding hands and glancing behind you, to make sure no one would snitch on you.

All the way to the city was an adventure, like always when you were with Luke. A few monsters appeared on your way but the best swordsman was beside you and quickly, he defeated them. And you were ready to help him (not that he needed it) but Luke told you, “If someone can't take a few monsters for you, then they're not worth it” And he returned to fight while you were too stunned to do or say anything.

After that, he cleaned himself with some water and you two continued on your way to the city, talking and laughing all the way, and sooner you were on some random street of the city, watching all around you. Everything glowed almost like your cabin, but what really caught your eye, was a big golden harp, with crystal flowers on it, and it made it brighter, but instead of making you look to other way it only made you look at it intensely. Your eyes were glued to the harp, and your feet to the ground, so when Luke noticed you weren't by his side, he got worried, looking at the crowd around him, he finally spotted you, you were in front of a store, looking something. When he walked next to you, he understood why you stopped, indeed was beautiful.

“Wanna ask the price?” Your eyes didn't move from the harp, “No need, there's the price but it's too expensive, I can't afford it” Luke looked at the sign and you were right. “Who says you have to pay for it?” He was teasing you now, “I'm not stealing it, Luke” Rolling your eyes, you grabbed his hand and walked away from the beautiful harp.

The son of Hermes just smirked shaking his head, you don't have to steal it.

He laughs just remembering that night, now with the harp in his arms, rushing to his cabin without being caught. He was seriously exhausted from being chased by the employees of the store, they're seriously worse than the monsters.

He placed the harp on one of the night tables beside his bed. The plan was to leave it at your cabin, so it'd be the first thing you'd see when you wake up, but the tiredness screamed to his body to just lie down and he promised he'd deliver to you in the morning, which will it be in two hours-ish.

But when the morning came, he only woke up by the noise around him. Who could be making so much noise so early? Opening his eyes, he noticed he was surrounded by boxes of chocolates, roses, everything.

what the h—

“You're finally awake, we're trying to clean up the entrance, but there's a huge mountain of gifts for you, so we'll be glad if you help us”

Gifts? Mountain?

“Shit! It's Valentine's” The sudden realization makes him fully awake. The harp was still on his night table, untouched. He cursed himself and hurried to take a shower, he couldn't wait to see you.

But the day didn't go as he planned, everything was wrong, and it was night already. Luke was waiting for you at the campfire, the harp by his side, but ten minutes went by and you didn't show up. He begin to worry, why would you miss it? You adore singing and everyone loves to hear you, especially him.

Once again, he grabbed the harp, and made his way to your cabin. You're outside, sitting alone, your legs crossed and with something in your hands. You close your eyes and your sweet voice breaks the silence, you're singing, but it's not a song he can recognize nor the sentiment you're used to sing, usually you sing only happy songs, it's weird when you sing something so... nostalgic.

He walks closer, he's only a few steps from you, when his name comes out of your mouth.

And you've seen all my darkest fears Like you've known me for a thousand years The girl who's really underneath All the scars and insecurities, baby I swear that you've been sent to save me You're Luke, the only one that my heart keeps coming back to

The song is about him. A million thoughts running in his mind. When did you write it? Why didn't you sing to him? And—

“Do you really feel that way about me?” Your eyes don't meet his at first, but you are tired of running away from your feelings, it was or never “Yes” His eyes look at yours deeply, almost like he could see the truth from them. If it weren't for the harp on his arms, he would just run to you, but instead, he put it on the floor next to you, your eyes open fully when you see it. It's the harp you wanted.

You jump into his arms, and he catches you quickly, holding you tight, your faces so close that you can feel his breath, he looks at your cherry lips, licking his, you're waiting for him to kiss you, but he takes his time to admire your face, how could someone be so pretty?

You can't wait any longer, and connect your lips, they're soft and rough, the perfect combination, and the best part it's, that they fit with yours, like a puzzle piece.

“This belongs to you” He nods his head to the harp, “Now you can sing it again”

♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡

song: Always been you by Shawn Mendes

[laroserie]

i probably won't extend of that expect if people want me to (still scared of getting told to kms for writing about hh or hb) but !

the idea of (yandere? not necessarily but i am a yandere fan) Alastor whose darling/the reader is a baker!

the reader is of course a sinner, but they aren't someone that ended up in hell for something like murder or a really big sin, something more silly, petty. they were in hell for a while, they accepted that they were stuck there and decided to just keep on 'living'

so they open up a bakery, maybe they were a baker when they were alive or maybe they just like to bake - either way, they open their little bakery in a part of the ring of hell that is kinda better off then the rest, one part where their store is less likely to get burned down.

they will somewhat peacefully - outside of when the extermination happen, they fear for their life - and they still aren't sure as to how they survived that many years in hell. and they often have to get their shop fixed up after the yearly extermination. that bit is annoying but outside of that, life is as peaceful as life in hell can be.

before Alastor disappeared for seven years, he used to be a somewhat regular customer, you made some pretty good breads and pastries. it was when he was starting to get more and more powerful as an overlord so you were very much on the verge of passing out everytime he came in the store and tried to limit the amount of words shared between the two of you. you never knew if you ever slipped and ended up offending him, you didn't want to be an another one of those broadcasted scream.

but once he reached his peak, a few years before his disappearance, you stopped being this tensed up around him, you started engaging in small talks with him, it wasn't anything extraordinary, mostly centering around the weather and what he choose to buy this time. at some point you even started to ask him to sample one of your creation before officially selling it.

you ended up being somewhat attached to the radio overlord.

and then he ... was gone. for seven years. you were somewhat sad about this, but you were not THAT close to him so you get over it.

but one day, while going about your day, while serving a customer you hear something weird, about a certain overlord being back.

you don't really believe in it, until you hear one of his broadcast, a small smile creep on your face hearing it. you're happy to hear him again, to know he is still alive and well. but you don't expect to see him in person or anything like this, you doubt he even remember you but one day, one morning shortly after you opened the bakery - you heard the little noise made from the bell of the entrance alerting you that someone has opened the front door, and you see him.

without thinking much, you smile at Alastor and give him a warm 'Good morning !' and again, without thinking you add 'It's been a while, glad to see you're back.' you only realize that one of the most powerful overlord could not like a measly sinner to talk to them like they are a friend when they are barely acquaintances that haven't seen each others in seven years.

but before you can correct yourself and let out a ton of 'sorry please don't kill me' Alastor answer you with a 'Hm, yes it's been quite some time. I am glad to see you still running this bakery dear.'

you simply nod at him and decide to ask what you ask every customers 'So what will you get today ?'.

[fuck-i-like-too-much-stuff]

Small addition to the Professor Peem and Professor Q tag because I seriously need to focus on my studies but We Are knaws at my brain.

"You may know that since Professor Q has taken a sabbatical for the rest of semester and since his half of the syllabus is complete, your doubts can be taken up by me. Please feel free to approach me anytime, I'll be in my office." Peem ended the lecture and dismissed the class. Yet no one moved. He looked up with confusion to the lack of commotion, to see eyes of concern.

"What's wrong?" He asks, no answer.

"Guys, I said you were dismissed. Don't you have more classes today?"

"Professor Peem, are you okay?"

Peem doesn't know what his students are talking about. He looks to his feet, trying to observe what is wrong with his appearance. Yeah, his shirt is a little untucked and his tie isn't as proper as it should've been. Yeah, maybe he could've done a better job with his hair today morning. But that shouldn't be enough to warant concern from his students, to let them know that he is, in fact, very much not okay.

It was a month ago that Phum had to leave for Singapore for two months. It was a month ago that he had started to tell himself that this was not that big of a deal. It was a month ago that he was sure these two months would go by in a blink of an eye and his Phum would be back in his arms even before he could complete the blink. It wasn't until two days back, when Q and Toey left for their Europe trip did he realise that this blink felt more like an endless and painful coma.

Yet, what he doesnt realise that this syncing of his breakdown has, once again, fed the rumors of his and Q's apparent relationship.

When his students refuse to leave the hall, despite Peem's reassurances, he does so himself. The moment he does, the murmurs begin.

"Did they break up? Is that why Professor Q took a sabbatical?"

"He takes one every year, that can't be it."

"Didn't someone say that he was going on a Europe trip? Who goes on such a romantic trip without their boyfriend?"

"Maybe Professor Peem was supposed to go but they broke up so he didn't."

"That seems a little too cruel, even for Professor Q."

"Guys, you might want to look at this-"

Toey's instagram handle open on the mobile screen, it shows a photo of him and Q looking over the sunset at the Saimes River.

"A water body. Wow, maybe Professor Q is that cruel."

The next day rolls around and now that Peem has understood that his breakdowns have to be very strictly reserved for his house and Phum's daily videocalls only, he looks just as he did always. But what doesn't change still is the sympathetic looks he catches in class.

Is he still looking pathetic?

In the staff room, he catches a hold of Fai who tells him he certainly doesn't look like he spent the last night crying. Helpful.

His phone automatically calls Fang when it comes to advice regarding puffy eyes and dark circles, not because Fang cries a lot but because between the architecture firm and being in love with Tan, he does not sleep a lot.

"I told you, you need a break. Your routine is not healthy right now, and I'm sure the college will allow you a few days off."

"I have a lot of classes, Fang. And I've to take up any doubts regarding Q's half too. This is not the time for me to take a break. Now will you tell me what to do about my eyes, or should I tell Tan that you ate the donuts I brought for him?"

Ice packs after crying, eye cream and if need be so, a little bit of concealer. Concealer that he will have to buy since Fang is not sharing his, or even Tan's. "Infections, much? Plus you're not my shade nor Tan's."

He is at the department store that is supposed to have everything. Which includes his needs for today, ice cream, rose scent candles, eye cream, and his shade of concealer, and the cologne that Phum wears because he misses his boyfriend and at least the house can smell a little like him. It also includes everything one of his students had on their list as well, because he finds her trying to sneakily click a photo of Peem trying to find the cologne.

"Guys, he's buying the cologne Q wears. He misses him so much. I also saw him buy eye cream."

Actually Q does wear the same brand of cologne as Phum, mostly because Phum is the one who introduced it to him, but its not the same cologne itself. That's not a detail the fine arts student care about as much as the wrinkle count of Peem's forehead as he tries to figure out the reason behind his student's behavior before walking over to where she is.

"Can I help you Reem?"

He then watches as his student fumbles her phone to the ground, apologise repeatedly, pick up her phone which he is sure has a broken screen now, and run away.

He reiterates the whole tale to Phum when he reaches home, a long ten minute podcast of an audio. Exactly eleven minutes after, he recieves a call from the same person, the person he needs the most.

"Hey. Long day, huh?" The soft voice speaks and if Peem hadn't kept his ice cream in the fridge, it would've also melted with him.

After an hour, Phum agrees with Fang about Peem needing a break but he also knows better than to suggest it because he knows Peem couldn't bring himself to abandon his class a month before their exams. So he says, "I'll be back very, very soon. And then your students will see just how happy you can be. Okay?"

And Peem hangs on to that okay for the next month, hangs on as if for dear life. And in this month, unbeknownst to Toey himself because he really does not care for Instagram notifications when he has his P'Q in the most romantic setting of the century, Toey's instagram account gains about fifty new followers who all have the same goal- plot revenge on Q.