#and then shipping is like thirty two dollars

[ferbiknowhatweregonnadotoday]

wishing i could buy the perry the platypus pillow pet but its soo expensive :[

[ardate]

Genuinely what the fuck is that

Can anyone tell me what the fuck is wrong with Discogs sellers and their bonkers ass shipping prices

[uluthrek]

au in which robert, the starks and the lannisters play monopoly instead of going hunting and pushing each other‘s kids from towers.

tyrion implements a tax system to make things more interesting and fights cersei over the cat for a solid ten minutes.

around thirty minutes into the game, catelyn realizes that she has free will and stops paying taxes.

arya and sansa haggle over new york avenue, which ends up being bought by theon. this causes the two to completely cast aside their differences, ally and subsequently start doing everything in their power to make theon‘s life hell.

theon himself is quite severely stoned the entire time throughout.

ned enters horrendous debt pretty much immediately and, after two hours of being financially sucked dry by both cersei and his tax evader of a wife, decides to just place his figurine in jail and never leave.

jon, playing the dog, controls the railroads and makes jaime, playing the ship, go completely broke within minutes. being beaten by a bastard and officially the first to lose the game makes jaime so mad he spends the rest of the evening perched on the family‘s ancestral armchair eating flaming hot cheetos and stifling sobs.

cersei is holding onto her last two dollars and her one house in atlantic avenue like a maniac and evades taxes like it‘s an olympic sport. she claims ownership of kentucky avenue on the grounds that red is her house‘s color at least twice. after three hours, she‘s consumed enough vintage red to kill a large mammal and keeps quoting the art of war. fascinatingly enough, she never goes completely broke.

robert, just as broke and drunk as his wife but not nearly as ferocious, proposes marriage for tax advantages to bran, who is in possession of the boardwalk and lets him dangle on his proposition for two rounds before accepting and feeling like a benevolent god.

sansa sees this and immediately proposes to arya, who accepts, only for them to be sued by their mother for public indecency („you‘re siblings, jesus christ!“). arya argues that this is just a game and that one could argue that robert‘s and bran‘s marital alliance is just as if not even more inappropriate, considering that bran is seven and robert thirtyseven. sansa countersues her mother for tax evasion, who promises she‘ll drop her lawsuit if her daughters let her keep hoarding perverse amounts of wealth. „love wins!“ arya says, which causes jaime, still perched on the armchair but now eating old nan‘s home made whiskey truffles, to hysterically sob. cersei stares him down.

robb, in a rare moment of almost prophetic foresight, excuses himself one hour in and goes on a very, VERY long walk with grey wind.

tyrion, whose tax system has spectacularly backfired in his face, proposes marriage to catelyn, jon and cersei in rapid succession, who all turn him down. „i wish i was the monster you think i am. i wish i had enough poison for the whole pack of you. i would gladly give my life to watch you all swallow it.“ he screams before he leaves the table.

at that, joffrey, who has refused to participate and instead sits on the couch playing doom on his nintendo ds, starts hysterically laughing. tyrion turns on his heel and awards his nephew with the bitchslap of the century. this causes cersei to completely abandon the game and chase after him with a broom. catelyn makes sure that everyone is distracted by the lannister antics and then reaches across the table and bags cersei‘s money and properties.

with a heavy heart, myrcella trades arya and sansa one of her limited edition bayala schleich unicorns for park place.

at this point, the game is between the tycoons that are catelyn and jon, the bran-robert alliance, the arya-sansa-alliance, and ned, who is still in jail and watching ice hockey on his phone under the table. that is when catelyn hears rickon gagging and discovers that he, in the absence of tyrion, the self declared bank manager, has managed to eat all bank notes from the box.

rickon gets his stomach pumped, cersei and tyrion have both been arrested, theon is still stoned, arya, sansa and myrcella have wandered off to go play schleich horses, and jon remains at the table, alone, content, and quietly considering himself the winner.

[childesblanket]

A pearl

chp 1; Let them eat cake!

as you walk down the halls of tevyat university, three big textbooks and one overflowed binder in hand, on your way to a film class that you had randomly decided to take for the second semester. you stop by a vending machine and decide to reward yourself with one of the new snacks they had put in there. one random glass jar of coffee. unfortunately, trying to place your books down neatly, they slip out your hand. On your way down to pick it up, you hear loud stomps approaching, looking up you find your long time friend, childe, smiling up at you.

"i should've known it was your fat ass with those heavy footsteps."

"and that's why you're buying the 1000 calorie unknown tevyat coffee?"

you roll your eyes at childe's sassy replies, already used to it. you drop a couple dollars into the vending machine and watch the coffee drop from the bottom shelf.

"Where you headed? I didn't know you had classes at this time."

he picks your stuff up for you, handing the heavy textbooks and proceeding to take his long strides that you had to keep up with.

"I did, but i signed up for a film class because i felt underworked for one week. i'm totally not in the right state of mind to start another class, but we persevere!"

"Film? Ooh scara takes that class! He majors though, say hi to him for me he's really purple and hard to miss!"

is all childe says before running off, already spotting new friends like the social person he is. you take a sip of the coffee and instantly make a scowl face, choosing to close it and have it by your side the whole day.

you sit down in the class, unfortunately for you there was less than twenty-five people in the class, so everyone had already become close friends along with the teacher.

you sit down on an empty seat when a small group of people come in, along with the teacher following behind.

A few minutes later, and everyones settled in and paying attention. you had grown to learn that there's nineteen people in the film class. The teacher calls out your name, and luckily for you, all he does is welcome you instead of making you introduce yourself. The boy next to you is the one you assumed childe was talking about, so you smile at him, but he just wierdly stares back.

"Ok.." you think in your head

"Alright, class. turn to anyone next to you, and that will be your partner for this project. I'm sure most of you are familiar with cinematography, this being your second semester here," and he looks right at you "but if your not, this will be a great opportunity to learn. I want a short, no more than thirty minute film. It has to be a glimpse into you and your partners life, either separately or it could be about any relationships or friend ships you have. This is due in two and a half months, it could be filmed on anything, but you guys obviously know what gets you extra points. I give you this class period to discuss. oh, and, it needs a song."

after listening to your teacher ramble, you curse yourself for not sitting between two students and instead opting for the edge seat, you turn to the purple headed boy who's already writing ideas in his notebook.

"uh.. what do you have so far?"

he lifts his head up, showing his notebook.

"Uh, I'm writing down a few movies that would fit this project, just to see how we should combine our stories, i guess."

from his tone of speech, you could see that he was excited about this project, but definitely not to do it with you.

"Bones and all? I see how the stories would combine now. hm. Okay so.. how about we do this, your story or whatever could go first, and we could move it to any experience i share, and then me, and it would bring us both here."

"oh. that's actually, pretty good."

and just like that, the two of you spent the rest of the fourty-five minutes of that class talking about your project, you leaving with a new number in your phone and a new address in your mind.

[saint-ambrosef]

"Processed foods are generally cheaper than unprocessed or minimally processed foods" sorry but in what fucking world do you live in where processed food is cheaper than non-processed. like this is a genuine question. unless you live somewhere like remote alaska where there's enormous cost to shipping fresh food (and people who say this are usually not talking about these situations), i cannot imagine this, and have not witnessed this in any grocery i've personally been to.

yes boxed mac and cheese is like a dollar but its only enough food for like 1.25 meals. most processed foods i see in the store are actually pretty expensive for how much food you get. a family bag of chips is like $4-5 now, and it's not even that filling so you're still hungry after eating half the bag in a sitting.

a can of beans, corn, half an onion, some oil, and a tin of tomatoes thrown together in a pot with spices and served with rice makes about 4-5 meals in half an hour for $5. this is a pretty well-rounded, filling, healthy meal. you know what would cost twice times as much? pre-made canned chili, not even including rice. for fifteen cents and thirty seconds, you can have a banana with a little cinnamon as a dessert. for breakfast fry up two eggs with some frozen peppers and toast, that'll be 5 minutes and $2.

[tragicallyreal]

Time Travel

“What they don’t tell you about time travel, is that we’re all already doing it,” I explained. “The past, present, future… For everything else, it’s just the present. We’re the only planet in the universe with a concept of -- on your left!”

Bernardo, a new recruit who I had the oh-so-wonderful job of training, dove to the right. This gave me ample opportunity to lob an orange at the enemy combatant who had appeared behind him. The orange tore through the enemy’s gut, leaving a gaping hole behind that bled profusely. The enemy collapsed and blinked out of existence in much the same way it had arrived.

“You have to watch out, they pop up out of nowhere,” I warned the newbie as I retrieved my orange from the hard, rocky ground.

Every soldier had their weapon of choice. Some preferred bats or broomsticks, others just picked up and chucked whatever they had on hand. But me? I liked oranges. They were a great weight for throwing, and sturdy enough to last a few rounds. Before, we used to spend millions of dollars developing high tech weapons to take out the invading forces. It wasn’t until one of the enemy was pierced through by a stray drinking straw that we realized the advantage we held over them. The cadet who had neglected to throw away the straw was awarded a medal of honor for the effort (or lack thereof).

“Excuse me,” Bernardo began timidly, “but shouldn’t I have learned all of this before we got on the battlefield?”

“Maybe if you were assigned some lame sergeant, like Reynolds. I like to do my training ‘on the job.’ You’ll learn faster. Besides, these guys don’t put up much of a fight.”

Another enemy combatant appeared two clicks in front of me. I reeled back and threw my orange straight for its head. It landed with a dull thwack and sent the poor sucker’s head flying. I almost felt bad for it, but not quite.

Over thirty years ago, when we’d first encountered the invading forces, it wasn’t like they came in on a ship or anything. They just sort of appeared. One second, we were all living our normal lives. Next thing we knew, there were thousands of shrieking blue aliens blipping in and out of existence, and whenever they did appear, they were out for blood. Everyone ran and hid, at first, because who wouldn’t? It didn’t take long for the military to step in and wipe them out, however.

And, once we learned how damn easy they were to kill? Well, they were practically begging us to take over their planet. That’s where my new cadet and I came in. With little to no combat experience required, and a big fat military paycheck, it was no surprise that people signed up for the war effort in droves. There were hundreds of thousands of us, idly walking across the planet and disposing of the so-called ‘enemy combatants.’

Maybe if they’d ever stuck around long enough to have a conversation, we’d have had something better to call them.

“Consider the four dimensions. We used to think we could only see three of them, you know? But, what we didn’t realize is that we can see the fourth dimension. We perceive time where the fourth dimension intersects with the other three -- that’s an event -- and each event is a fixed point in time and space. So what we do is…” I trailed off, realizing my new recruit’s eyes had all but glazed over in confusion. Why did they always have to send me the dull ones? There had to be some way to get through to him.

“Do you like Legos?” I asked. It was worth a shot.

That seemed to turn the lights back behind Bernardo’s glassy eyes. “... Legos?”

“Ah, there he is. Right, imagine we’re all in a big ol’ box of Legos. The enemy, they’re sitting in their same old spot, forever and ever. All they can move around in is the first three dimensions, so it’s sort of like they’re trapped inside a little Lego brick. But we are like a hand reaching into the box.” I stuck my hand through a nearby enemy combatant to emphasize my point. Its thick yellow blood clung to my suit, but vanished along with the rest of the body not a moment later.

Bernardo, bless his heart, started to catch on. “So… because we can move through time, the fourth dimension, we can… pick up the Legos?”

“So he can think for himself. Yes, we can pick up the Legos, or shoot the Legos, or throw oranges at them. Since we’re higher dimensional beings, we can move objects through the fourth dimension -- like a hand moving around the Lego bin -- to intersect with their three dimensional world. It cuts through them like a hot knife through butter! They also can’t see us coming, because they can’t perceive the fourth dimension at all.”

He screwed his eyes shut, as if trying to picture it. “Alright, they can’t see us coming, and we can just cut through them like it’s nothing? Isn’t that… kind of unfair?”

I blinked, stopping in my tracks. “Unfair?”

Just ahead of us, another battalion of soldiers mowed through a couple dozen enemy combatants. The enemies were never around too long, it was kind of hard to get a good look at their faces. What did they look like, when we killed them? Were they afraid?

“Honestly, I never gave it much thought. And it’s not like we can ask them.” I ambled onward, pulling a fresh orange from my bag. “Besides, they attacked us first.”

[raayllum]

Hi! I’m not in this fandom, but I have a friend who is a big fan of the show. I was wondering if you have any gift ideas related to the dragon prince? I’m thinking about something in the 20 to thirty dollar range. Do you have any ideas? sorry if this message is bothersome. Thank you!

Omg no problem!! There's a decent amount of TDP merch out there, a lot of it something your friend might like! (I have a fandom merch tag here as well if you want more ideas)

There are four graphic novels (which many fans purchase, but not all do) that your friend might like that are within the $20 range, most of which focusing on the main cast of characters when they were younger.

Bloodmoon Huntress: focuses on Rayla (main elf girl) and her dads Runaan and Ethari

Through the Moon: focuses on Rayla and Callum (scarf wearing main guy)

Puzzle House: focuses on Claudia, an antagonist with the black and white hair

Dreamer's Nightmare: the latest one focusing on Callum and his brother, Ezran (kid with the crown and the toad, Bait); it came out a few weeks ago

There are also novelizations for the first two seasons, though they are geared prose wise towards a younger audience (they do have fun lore tidbits and stuff like that, though). Likewise, there's merch (pins and lanyards) in the $12.00 range that just came out for characters - though shipping costs can sometimes be a pain.

Sites like Etsy also often have stuff for sale like Callum's scarf if your friend wants something quietly fandom / cozy, or shirts / keychains with characters from the show.

If you want help identifying characters and/or ships (aka if your friend is a Rayllum or Janaya fan, etc) just let me know! I think it's really sweet and awesome you're taking your friend's interests to heart when picking a gift out for them <3

[klapollo]

🚨HEY IF YOU NEED MASKS!!!🚨

Now that my package came and I can confirm it's legit this home depot listing WILL get you ten (!!) KN95 masks for just two dollars and change. I didn't have to pay shipping on my order either.

I got thirty masks for only ten dollars and they come in all different colors (white, blue, black and pink) if you're like me and like to match them to your outfits! I know masks that aren't the little cloth surgical ones can be pricey and/or just hard to find lately so I wanted to pass this along.

[dollieroulette]

An Exciting Development--

The last Mystery Doll purchase of the year! I had been holding off posting about him due to some....somewhat shady practices from the estate company (who I am going to leave anonymous, haha.) A quick explanation! (EDIT: Quick. Lol. Sure, Rose. ok.) I saw this doll lot on an online bidding site-- got excited, figured I'd give it a go. The pictures left a lot to be desired; slightly blurry, no real details other than the box.

(I see you, Dollfie Dream insert.) So...the original pictures were not great. More under the cut!

Hm. Great. Still! I am intrigued! So I shot him a message asking for clearer photos-- he gave me his phone number to call or to text for more information (not entirely uncommon for estate sale/resale folks.) and I did so, eager to see if I could puzzle out what I was looking at before jumping all in on bidding. He sent me these pics after I asked:

The back of a Modoll head.

A mystery head-- is this the head that goes to the Modoll back? (Spoiler: It is not)

oh- ok. Maybe this guy is the modoll head? (Spoiler: Again, no.)

Mm. Oh. Ok. Alright.

Ok, yeah, see this I'm intrigued by. Alright! I was pleased, I thanked the man and put in a bid! It should be noted here that I've left some photos out-- there was some old con merch included that belonged to a con staff person. I figure I'll spare them the possibility of being doxed, as I'm not sure what led them to getting rid of their project doll and con merch. (Estate auctions, especially this sort of auction, are not always a result of the object owner's death-- in this case, I think that maybe the person who owned this doll sold off their belongings as a lot. They likely are still kickin'. At least I hope they are!) So, from here things got weird. I was in the process of researching (Image searching and the like) when I found that the estate sale company had also listed it...on ebay. For 800 bucks. Lol; ok. New pics led me nowhere really other than to confirm that this was, in fact, the same lot I had just bid on three days prior on an entirely different site. I was a bit anxious but obstinate. Write that on my grave.

I realized he did this probably because during our conversation I explained why the doll having, y'know, human parts wasn't all that strange? It was just a doll. With anatomy. He seemed to think that it having "male parts" made it..."adult". We both had a laugh about that. Following that I explained why I was interested in the doll-- I knew that he MAY turn around and go "oh I want more for this," but I cannot resist the urge to explain one of my hyperfixations. I guess he missed the bit where I said, "This doll is potentially worth a pretty penny-- however, without seeing it in person I have no way of knowing if it's legit or not, and most people do not want to spend much on a fake doll, which this could very well be." So uhhh...he took the first half of that sentence and tried to list the damn thing at close to the original cost for...the doll on front of the box. Which, uh, this doll is not. Nor is it in the sort of condition that would sell for 800 bucks. Whatever~! Whatever. I won the previous auction for....

Thirty Two American DollARS.

And then anxiously waited for the doll to ship to me. Which, after some trouble (The USPS did not scan the box it was sent to me in ONCE, leaving me AND the sales person very nervous.) it DID ARRIVE. HOWEVER. It arrived while I was out of town-- 14 hours out of town. Further inspection would have to wait...although I did force my buddy Mallory to unbox him to take a pic of his bod for me.

She made a point to tell me that this process was weird as all hell. "It's fine, it's art." I assured her. "I am deleting these pictures immediately. Also, I'm not putting his clothes back on." She responded. Fair enough. What an interesting fellow, though! Who's bod is this? Also he appeared to be -big sized-, which was exciting. As per usual, I turned to the BJD Discord. They pretty immediately got the bod narrowed down to a LUTS model-- this one, specifically. Rad.

The head though-- no clue. Maybe a DIM Minimee? Possibly a sculpt meant to be a specific jrocker or visual kai artist? We couldn't get it hammered out. It didn't help that the back of his head was uh... bad. It was bad. Whoever owned him previously was very obviously trying to mod him for -some reason- and had scraped off or cut out any sign of company name. Ah well. I'd have to wait till I got home to examine him in person. And GOOD NEWS. I AM HOME. I HAVE EXAMINED HIM IN PERSON. I'm losing light steadily so probably won't post for another day or so with the "Check out all the parts" update, but-- SOON. I can confirm, however, that the body looks to be legitimate. The dress, too, was unopened and very well made-- leading me to believe that it is also a legit dollfie dream outfit. As for the other bits? Not a clue. We have two heads missing the back plates and a set of hands that belong to the dollfie dream on the box. One head is still a mystery and the other seems to be a dollzone head-- slightly bigger than my previous fella, but not by much. :) So there we have it! The last doll of the year. Expect a couple more posts in regards to this massive fella.

[practically-an-x-man]

22 for Lars/Jimmy?

Ooooh thank you!!

22. two miserable people meeting at a wedding au Send Me a Ship and a Number and I'll Write a Short Fic

Oh, and Jimmy's a human in this one, not a ghost XD

____ 'Till Death Do Us Part

Word Count: 1.1k Content Warnings: None really, just a simple meet-cute

Crossposted on AO3 ____

Lars wandered the reception, a half-filled plate of food balanced in his hand. None of it looked particularly appetizing - too... prissy, too fancy, he'd have given anything for a normal ham and cheese sandwich instead of dressed-up wedding food right about now.

They'd really gone all out for this whole getup, and he'd never understood it. It wasn't that he didn't enjoy weddings, not as a concept, but he'd never felt the need to blow thousands of dollars on some flashy blowout when it all would be reduced to holiday cards and semi-forgotten anniversaries in a few years. In his mind, weddings should've been left as a symbol of love for the people involved, maybe a few close friends to share the memory, not some overblown status symbol that cost more than half its guests made in a year.

And he couldn't find a seat.

The only thing worse than being forced to eat prissy food in an expensive suit, he thought, was not being able to eat prissy food in an expensive suit because he couldn't find a place to sit. One of life's many little paradoxes. Lars Pinfield was not a fan.

He finally spotted an empty seat amidst all the extravagant chaos, and beelined straight for the table. He stopped himself just in time, one hand on the back of the chair, and glanced at the dark-haired man already seated in the next space over.

"This seat taken?"

"Go ahead." the young man replied with a dimpled grin, "Played musical chairs and wound up at the delinquents' table, huh?"

"The delinquents' table?" Lars echoed distantly, sliding into the chair and setting his plate of hors d'oeuvres on the table in front of him. There were no place markers set out - something about the bride and groom wanting their families to "mingle", though most of the guests had defaulted to the familiar anyway.

"Sure," the stranger said with a good-natured shrug, and gestured at the other spaces around the table, "Reserved for punk nephews, the wine aunt who probably shouldn't have access to the open bar..."

He waved a hand at himself and grinned.

"....The bride's one gay cousin," he said, then gestured at Lars, "And friends-of-friends-of-friends looking for a seat. All the guests they don't remember inviting. Ah- I wouldn't eat the deviled eggs. Those are my Aunt Mary's."

"What's wrong with them?" Lars asked, bewildered, an egg pinched between his thumb and forefinger. They'd seemed like about the only normal food on the catering table, half-hidden amidst quince canapés and pâté crostini and other foods with far too many accent marks in their names.

"Glaucoma. You've got about a thirty percent chance that orange powder on top is actually paprika and not cinnamon. Dunno about you, but that's not a risk I'd take."

"Right." Lars muttered, and set the deviled egg back down on his plate. The other man shot him half a smile, a dimple creasing one cheek, then crossed one leg over the other and peered out at the meandering crowd around them. He was dressed in a navy pinstripe suit, a red handkerchief in his left breast pocket bringing a splash of color down his chest. His tie was the same shade of red, though his tie clip was banded in an bright eight-striped rainbow. He seemed to catch Lars' eyes lingering on it an extra moment.

"My cousin had the gall to tell me not to dress 'too gay' for the wedding," he said, and twisted his wrists to show off matching rainbow cufflinks, "Funny thing is, I wouldn't even have the cufflinks if she hadn't said that. Bought 'em just to bother her. Figure it's not enough to crash the wedding or start a fight, just enough that she'll feel like an ass for telling me what's 'too gay'."

Lars hadn't even brought cufflinks. His suit was rented for the day. He didn't mind dressing up a little, but his idea of dressing up usually meant a button-down and slacks for work, rarely anything more. He'd have felt underdressed if he hadn't noticed the groom's uncle walking around in a sweat-stained polo shirt all morning.

"I'm Jimmy, by the way." the man added, almost as an afterthought, and extended a hand. Lars distractedly shook it and introduced himself. Jimmy offered him another beaming, dimpled smile, then glanced at the watch on his right wrist.

"There's my token hour, I think." he muttered, "Think I'm gonna sneak out and try to find some real food. Know any good places around here? Preferably cheap? Blew all my budget on the plane ticket."

"You're assuming I'm from London just because I'm English?"

Destination wedding. Wouldn't have been so much of a destination if he hadn't moved to the States for work two years back. Part of him wondered, from Jimmy's accent, if they might've crossed paths at some point or another. Unlikely, given New York City housed over eight million people. But it was an interesting thought.

"No, I'm assuming you've been to London because you're English. I'll take half-credit on my Idiot American card, at least." Jimmy teased, "And if you ever hop across the pond to New York, feel free to cash in that credit and make me drag you around to my favorite pizza place."

Lars blinked. Was he flirting? Did that count as the offer of a date? Or was it just a hypothetical? He had the feeling that Jimmy didn't put much weight into the things he said - he took life lightly, polite but without fear, and that made these things a little hard to judge.

"I'm in New York now, actually."

"Pretty sure we're both in London now, darling." Jimmy shot back without missing a beat, "That or I spent way too much on plane tickets."

"No, I mean- I live in New York. For work. I work in biology."

Parabiology, technically, but the para- didn't usually go over so well on first meetings. Far too many people were quick to deem his line of work a crock of shit, Ghostbusters or not.

"Hm. Well, I meant what I said. Patsy's Pizza in Manhattan. I'll buy." Jimmy said, and brushed off his lap as he stood up. He extended a hand out to Lars, like an old-fashioned gentleman inviting his partner to a dance. "But until then... want to sneak out while we've got the chance?"

Anything would be better than this stuffy reception. He'd been wanting an escape practically since he arrived. And a witty, handsome man with a nice smile, offering to whisk him away... that was one hell of an escape.

It felt like the choice of a lifetime yet hardly a choice at all. He took Jimmy's hand.

"Sure." Lars said, "I'll take you to Poppie's."

[introut]

[...] basics :

name.         ───         loren vanders.

nickname(s).         ───         lors ( pronounced laws ), vanders.

gender      +      pronouns.         ───         cis   man,   he/him.

age.         ───         twenty-seven.

label.         ───         the manchild.

date of birth.         ───         8th august.

hometown.         ───         london, uk.

occupation.         ───         dj   +   owner   of   several   failed   business   +   heir   to   a   candy   empire   ( think   mars ).

penthouse.         ───         21C.

time in avalon.         ───         six years.

nationality.         ───         british.

zodiac.         ───         leo.

traits.         ───         impulsive,   incompetent,   stubborn,   unfocused,   carefree,   curious,   enthusiastic,   easy   going.

aesthetics.         ───         a   get   out   of   jail   card,   falling   off   a   treadmill   when   a   baddie   walks   past,   toasting   to   an   empty   room,   a   warm   smile   and   cold   hands,   calling   the   one   person   you   shouldn't,   shirtless   selfies   from   a&e..

net worth.         ───         $11.8B ( tied   up   in   assets   in   a   trust   fund ).

character parallels.         ───         michael kelso,   jamie tartt,   ferris bueller.

[...] summary :

the   vanders   family   acquired   their   wealth   through   a   candy   empire   that   has   been   passed   down   several   generations.   loren   was   lucky   enough   to   be   born   to   two   loving   and   understanding   parents,   but   unfortunately   ill-equipped   to   handle   his   constant   need   for   attention   and   restlessness.   to   this   day,   he   thinks   being   shipped   off   to   boarding   school   as   abandonment.

he   has   a   good   relationship   with   his   parents,   though   his   lack   of   ambition   and   desire   to   live   off   family   money   made   them   worry.   a   pleasure-seeker   who   chased   only   the   good   times,   and   escaped   anything   which   threatened   that.   things   became   rocky   when   he   learned   what   his   parents   did.   he   would   in   the   far   future   inherit   shares   in   the   company,   but   he   has   limited   access   to   his   trust   fund   until   he   ears   his   own   million.

but   this   changed   very   little.   nearing   thirty,   having   refused   to   join   the   family   company,   all   he   has   is   several   failed   businesses   under �� his   belt.   turns   out,   even   with   some   help,   it's   hard   to   earn   a   million   dollars.   he   still   doesn't   understand   why   mismatched   socks   didn't   blow   up.   but   his   focus   has   never   lied   with   work.   all   of   his   escapades   have   only   lead   to   disappointment   which   suits   him   as   he   buries   his   head   in   the   sand.

he   moved   to   new   york   to   have   some   more   freedom,   with   this   belief   that   his   parents   will   change   their   minds   one   day.   his   days   are   filled   with   having   fun   with   his   friends   and   his   evenings   are   going   out.   like   any   icky   man,   he   has   also   taken   up   dj-ing.   maybe   this   show   will   help   him   earn   his   first   $1m,   but   for   that   to   happen   it   needs   to   succeed.   does   he   capitalise   on   his   relationship?

[its-raining-here]

is #repostober actually a thing we're doing 😅

i drew this like two years ago and i still really like it (i like it enough to sell stickers of it, even)

some notes under the cut

I think most of these costumes are obvious except maybe Carol and Darryl, but just in case:

Ron and Samantha are Bert and Mary Poppins. This idea came pretty quickly and it was, like Mary Poppins, practically perfect in every way.

Darryl and Carol are Bill and Ted, two characters that come in a pair but are not (necessarily) shipped together. I was struggling with these two but once I figured it out I knew nothing else would fit.

Mercedes and Henry are Morticia and Gomez, creepy and kooky and undeniably, passionately in love. I contemplated having Mercedes as Gomez and Henry as Morticia but Mercedes deserves to have someone romance her and treat her as sublime.

Glenn and Morgan are a generic angel and devil. I very briefly thought about Mustang and Hawkeye from FMA but decided against it because they either don’t like Halloween (Glenn) or don’t really care (Morgan) and would normally not bother dressing up at all, but Mercedes probably wouldn’t let them into the party without a decent costume. They spent thirty dollar in total for the angel wings, halo, devil horns and devil tail and raided each others’ closet for the rest. (Morgan’s. They raided Morgan’s closet.)

The sons (in order: Nick Close, Sparrow Oak, Grant Wilson, Lark Oak, Terry Junior) are obviously the Mighty Morphin’ Power Rangers, I refuse to believe nobody knows what the original Power Rangers look like. There wasn’t really any rhyme or reason to who was who, except for Nick and Terry (I hc Nick as Chinese-Japanese-Vietnamese and Terry as Blasian (Chinese-Filipino if we're being specific), respectively). I didn't want either of them to be the yellow ranger. They went trick or treating together and then spent the rest of the night watching horror movies in the Stamplers’ old Victorian house that’s probably haunted.

[beeqisch]

top five fic recs 🌟

these arent in a specific order, just fics i like (so everyone else should like too) (jk)

also i only read timkon fics :(

1. dollar store robin - InkpotSprite

Tim bent over as his stomach cramped. His eyes watered and he couldn’t breathe as Jason loomed over him. God, he hadn’t laughed this hard in years. - Maybe dressing up in a Robin costume to fight his successor wasn't Jason's best idea.

funny thumbs up emoji thumbs up emoji

2. Pulling Pigtails - Diana_Raven

Detective Tim Drake and Detective Conner Kent have been at each other's throats professionally since they met, and finally decide to settle the matter with a bet--once and for-all. If Tim gets the most amount of collared felonies by the end of one year he gets Kon's infamous leather jacket, to do with whatever he wants (including burn it). If Kon wins, he gets to take Tim out on the worst date money doesn't buy, since Tim made his views on Kon's 'cheapest date possible' web search very clear. But the clock is running out, and they only have thirty three hours left.

(b99 au) i liked this one sm i started watching b99 (thank u Diana_Raven)

3. The Summer Tim Turned Pretty - Hayleythewriter

Tim is no longer the awkward Wayne brother. He's back from his freshman year of college, hotter than ever, and ready to spend another summer with the Kents at the Wayne Family Beach House. But will Conner Kent ever see him as more than his best friend's brother? au inspired by The Summer I Turned Pretty

hi i even made fanart of this one because i was like wow i like this a lot woah

4. sun-kissed - merils

Two truths and a lie: Kon, Bart, Cassie, and Tim have all piled into the Redbird to hit the beach for a day of summer fun in the sun! They're all gonna have a great time together. And Tim is not going to be distracted by Kon's tits the entire day. Yeah. That lie is hidden in there really well. Tim's sure of it. Right? ...Right?

I think about this one every single day

5. Everybody Talks - egg_thief

Bart snatches his phone back before Tim can finish reading all the comments on Kon’s post. And there had been a lot left unread. “I don’t understand…” Tim says, his brow scrunched in confusion. Bart shrugs, his hands fidgeting at his sides. “They’re all shipping you guys. It was the photo man- you guys are everywhere now.” Or: timkon band au, featuring falling in love, online rumors, and first kisses

BAND AU BAND AU BAND AU HELLO BAND AU

so yeaa these are my favs yayy ദ്ദി ( ᵔ ᴗ ᵔ )

[hellonorik]

Fandom people I'd like to get to know better!!

tagged by @rubberduckyrye hewwo :3

3 Ships I (currently) Like: Shipping my OCs with other people's OCs like:

Dixson/Roland/Ash/Adam: A superhero, a mercenary, a zombie, and a were-hyena walk into a bar and all share a brain cell. @somewhat-adorkable is so good for letting me get my fingies all up in her work.

Nimrod Jones and Ama: nerd love nerd love nerd love two nerds in love it's the best. @needleandstory and I have a whole entire three story house full of ships, but I'm playing Nim in sims 4 right now so maybe him and Ama can raise a cow plant together again

Kara and James: While not a ship, these two best friends are perfect and I love them. Squishing them and squishing you @batteredoptimist

First Ship Ever:

Dragon riders of pern AU where my OC Melanie/Melody crossed back and forth between earth and the pern world, and there were fire lizards. I'm sure there was a ship but I was just a wee baby. So baby that the main character of the actual trilogy is Menolly but my OC was totally different I promise you.

Last Song You Heard:

The Kill by Thirty Seconds to Mars has been in my head all morning. House-like carpet has also done irreversible damage to my brain

Favorite Child Book

Only You Can Save Mankind by Terry Pratchett. The apathetic teen protagonist that still trying resonates with me in a way we will not be discussing

Currently Reading

Nothing right now. Rye's fanfic is next on my list though. I AM going to read it.

Currently Watching

Glow up with my wife so she can tell me all about make up and the bad wig applications people do

Currently Consuming

I had a sad cold coffee because a pink thing exploded all over my desk and covered it in pink. My hoofs :( they've been dampened.

Currently Craving

Potatoes. Preferably a fried variety. I require the carbs.

Tagging People:

See it, steal it, sell it on the market for five dollars. We can split the profits.

[sergeant-angels-trashcan]

dc brain rot anon: hi hello OKAY tl;dr: it’s messy and just about to end as a series, but yes taylor’s nightwing is worth a read

so we’ve JUST gotten beardy dick in the most recent two(?) issues of taylor’s nightwing, but overall it’s been a decent run? it’s got adhd, let’s just say that. there are a lot of dropped threads or things we just sort of hand wave away, several tie in issues to ongoing dc events that distract from the plot, and it relies on flashbacks a lot… but you get great things like haley, dick going on a pirate adventure dressed like a harlequin romance novel cover (aka TITS OUT!!), dick having a half sister, and OMG LIL BABY DICK. you wanna pinch his cheeks. honestly, it’s very hawkeye coded how beat up and ridiculous this man is in this run, and redondo’s art makes him SO pretty. tbh the messiness of the plot aside, the whole concept of suddenly inheriting a lot of wealth, deciding to better your community, protecting your own backyard and the people in your building from organized crime and corrupt cops…? fraction/aja hawkeye energy. it’s even more reason why i’m piloting that kate/dick crack ship.

Screaming weeping fainting etc

WHAT clintcoded bullshit I adore it

Imagining Dick and Clint meeting on reddit or smth on a "landlords who aren't assholes" sub and Clint being like whoa...this sounds so familiar dude!!!

They agree to meet up and Clint brings Kate with to translate (Does not tell Dick OR Kate this btw Kate thinks they are having a friend date not working CLINTON)

Okay I just started reading this run of nightwing and Dick owns the whole block? OK but what about the bodega across the street? Clint and Kate buy up the boarded up offices because they're diversifying. Also they don't trust the guy who bought up a bunch of residential buildings across from them so it's kind of an observation thing. Kate opens her office there and is...living in it, which is probably against a zoning law or something and Dick has his eye on her. They see each other across the street a lot and give each other Pointed Glares. Lucky escapes containment and winds up in Dick's apartment and nobody knows how. (except Bitewing. She knows)

Anyway they are lowkey suspicious of each other. When Dick is hanging out on the roof/fire escape, Kate has a habit of going out on HER roof and singing very very loudly, sometimes with friends. Just to annoy him. She's gotten "Some Nights" stuck in his head so many times.

Anyway. Very suspicious of each other until Dick makes his announcement about the Alfred Pennyworth Foundation and suddenly Kate lives across the street from a billionaire who is being dogged by the press, who are BLOCKING THE BUSINESSES?!?!? The press needs to gtfo??? Look, you can move on your own, she can call the cops, or she can move you herself, but the cops will be nicer than she will, now maaaaybe if you make a purchase from one of the restaurants on the street she will give you an extra fifteen minutes to move but it's a minimum of thirty dollars!!!! Begone!!!

Dick has no idea this is happening he just knows the street was packed with press and half an hour later there was nobody.

Kate swings by about a week later with groceries (she is not looking at Dick) because it's probably hard for him to go shopping right now since he gets mobbed by reporters but like whatever it's just stuff from the bodega across the street and the community garden a few blocks over and maybe she swung by a grocer or something LOOK the point is it's not a big deal she's just being neighborly great ok bye tell your dog I said hi--

Dick interrupts her with 2 questions

1. How did she know which apartment was his? (She knows which fire escape he's usually on, she counted windows)

And

2. Are there eggs in there? He can make pretty good omlettes, does she want to come in for an omlette?

And then he SMILES at her and Kate just goes oh nooooo. Because that is a pretty smile and a pretty man, potentially the prettiest man she's ever seen. and he does make a good omlette

and ugh he's actually really nice and funny UNACCEPTABLE. now hawkeye has to make sure he doesn't get his dumb ass killed by rich assholes with hired guns. and unrelated, she winds up kind of taking care of Nightwing who keeps doing dumb shit with a severe head injury so Hawkeye gets stuck hauling his passed out giant self to her apartment to patch him up.

idk i'm in love with them

[reynita9]

The year is 1912, The luxurious “Millionare’s Special” steam engine oceanliner RMS Titanic is about to embark on her maiden voyage. Aboard it are John Aster, Isador Strauss & Benjamin Guggenheim; three of the world’s wealthiest men, who are opposed to the creation of the federal reserve banking system and turning the USA into a corporation. JP Morgan Chase, the owner of the ship, coincidentally was not aboard. He’d intended to be, but cancelled just hours before it’s departure. Which is terrible considering he’d invested 7.5 million dollars into it (1911 7.5 million… according to an internet inflation calculator that is equivalent to $2,401,002,631.53 “two billion ,four hundred one million ,two thousand ,six hundred thirty one dollars and fifty three cents” in 2023!) Tragically amongst thousands of others Aster, Strauss, and Guggenheim perished at sea when The Titanic crashed at full speed into an established iceberg. So sad. But without them around to use their wealth and power in opposition of the creation of a Federal Reserve System, in 1913, a year later, it was signed into law.

It’s interesting that now in present time, 2023, Billionaires were adventuring to the bottom of the ocean sea-floor, for entertainment’s sake, to traverse the oceanic graveyard of Titanic Shipwreckage.. of course they died too, and with full time coverage. All of those of us who never even asked suddenly being non-consensually updated and roped in. I was at work today and people were like “Did you hear? They ran out of air.” I’m like who the fuck even are they? But still, it’s trippy. Especially after a year of many satirical eat-the-rich-laugh-at-them-suffering films topped charts. In these times laughing at kings fall is all we have, I get it. But it gets weirder, because the CEO of OceanGate Expositions was married to a woman named Wendy Rush, who’s the great-great-great granddaughter (by blood) of Isador Strauss (remember him? mentioned above ^) it’s crazy! How esoteric. But I don’t really even want the focus to be on waterlogged billionaires or the late Strauss Bloodline.. I want to go back to 2023 JP Morgan Chase.. the original man is dead but his namesake and legacy live on, leeching evil into the earth. I wonder why it doesn’t get more press when ten days ago JP Morgan Chase Bank agreed to pay $260 million dollars to victims of Jeffrey Epstein to settle their class action lawsuit around the bank associating with Epstein as he trafficked people and even after he was convicted of pedophilia. TODAY, the same fucking day that these random rich bros die 20,000 leagues under the sea. 6/22/2023, JP Morgan Chase (bank) is fined 4 Million dollars for permanently deleting 47 million emails. I wonder what future lawsuits they sunk by deleting that info. I wonder if this OceanGate Submarine story is real or an intentional distraction/ psyop. Idk I’ve been writing for 15 min n just got hit with so much sleepiness I’m going to be lazy and not actually conclude this at all. Banks own media Banks have bloodlust Banks know how much we love bread and circuses and it’s all smoke and mirrors. A Triangle Of Sadness that we can’t do anything about until we realize how disgustingly low they will sink to get what they want. Abolishing these unimaginably massive wealth and power inequities is the only path forward, but first we have to sit with the information we’re given, and discern and be open minded, be curious, hold massive possibilities with our mind’s eyes. not shut down, or deflect with laughter. Not be lead like a mouse to a trap. They invest trillions into keeping us busy/distracted/subdued/subservient and it doesn’t even matter because we mock and police each other and make jokes of curiosity. “Conspiracy Bullshit” / unconscious trust and devotion.

I’m not saying any of this applies to anything: I am sure it is all coincidental, this is just here to make u smile. A joke. Love u.