#and then it was like.... ok well every one of them is actually a stalker

[ellecdc]

okay then consider this a request!! for poly!marauders or just remus/james/sirius, whatever you prefer, for a reader with excruciating period cramps (self-indulgent because mine are horrible, but whatever!!) if you could do it that would be awesome ily!

ok I'm sorry I really made this very much self indulgent in maybe the worst way ever lol. I've been having a lot of fun with chef!Sirius lately, and had briefly discussed this idea with @maladaptiveescapism a while back so it felt fitting. I've also gotten a lot of period fic requests before and have never been all that interested in them which is so strange seeing as I'm a person who experiences period's and they're really popular? WOW sorry, what a tangent. TL;DR, thanks for your request, sorry if I ruined it a little, I probably won't ever write a period fic again lol

chef!sirius x mixologist!reader who calls in sick to work because of her period [2.9k words]

part 1 | part 2 | part 3 | part 4 | part 5

CW: period fic, reader has PCOS, brief allusion to Sirius' shitty childhood, trans!Reggie agenda 'cause I can, Sirius worried reader won't be accepting of his trans brother (spoiler alert, we are because we love our trans homies), Sirius being the worst (positive & affectionate)

Sirius was on his best behaviour today.

Honest to god, hand to his heart, best behaviour.

But there was truly only so much one bloke could do when they had a Jeffery to deal with.

“I’m going to need one of your staff for the evening.” Jeffery said without preamble; standing half-in the kitchen with the swinging door to the floor propped open as if he wanted to ensure there were witnesses to this conversation should it go sideways.

“Jeffery, do you wake up every morning and smoke a bunch of crack before you come to work, or are you really just this dense?” Sirius spat as he dropped his pan in front of him and fought the urge to turn and give the floor manager a withering glare. 

Jeffery, well seasoned to Sirius’ theatrics, bit back an eye roll as he carried on. “We need someone to cover the bar.”

Sirius did turn at that, but his withering glare fell somewhere between aghast and bemused. “The bar?”

“The bar.”

“Why?”

“I need coverage for Y/N.” Jeffery explained with a sigh, clearly growing tired of Sirius’ line of questioning.

“Where is she?”

“She has called in sick, chef.”

“Sick with what?” Sirius continued, causing Jeffery’s brows to furrow as he stared at Sirius bemusedly. 

“I’m not exactly privy to those details, chef.” He explained slowly as if Sirius were some fussy toddler. 

“I just find it hard to believe that the same woman who left the hospital after getting her shoulder reset to come work a full eight hour shift would call in sick.”

Jeffery offered him a shoulder shrug (and a concerned look up and down that Sirius pretended he didn’t notice) before pilfering one of the kitchen staff for the evening. 

Sirius would worry about hating Jeffery later; he was more focused on figuring out what the hell was wrong with you and why you weren’t coming to see him to work. 

Sirius had his phone wedged between the side of his face and his shoulder whilst he juggled the many go-bags he had in his hands as he stood awkwardly outside of the door to your flat.

He admittedly knew where you lived only because he had driven you home after numerous closing shifts.

Fortunately, the intercom system in the anteroom of your building gave away your unit number.

Unfortunately, Sirius still had his hands full with the various go-bags.

Fortunately, an elderly lady was coming in at the same time and let Sirius into the building. 

Unfortunately, she insisted on chatting his ear off the whole lift ride up and actually held the door open to continue conversing even after they had arrived at her floor.

Sirius’ saving grace came in the form of the lift alarm buzzing for having kept the door ajar too long, and she was forced to bid him farewell. 

Which brought him here; standing outside of your flat like some kind of stalker as he waited for you to pick up your phone.

“Hello?”

“Hey, open your door.”

“Well hello to you too, chef.” You snarked at him again. 

“Yes, yes. I said hey, didn’t I? Open your door.”

“Why?”

“Because I’m standing on the other side of it.” 

There was the sound of a quick exhale and rummaging. “Why?”

“Listen, I’d love to play 20 questions, but do you think you could let me in first?”

You muttered something that sounded an awful lot like a swear before the line ended.

He allowed his phone to slip out of its place and into his awaiting hand when you flung the door open unceremoniously.

Now, Sirius could tell you’d not been expecting any company today; you were in the same clothes you’d likely slept in, your hair was perfectly rumpled from whatever position Sirius had just disturbed you from, and you looked more than a tad embarrassed to see him standing here.

He had sort of hoped you would look like a troll; make this raging flame he carried for you burn a little softer.

But no.

You just had to look ethereal and perfect and lovely and kissable.

Damn woman. 

“What are you doing here?” You finally asked, interrupting the both of you from staring at one another. 

“Helping?”

You made a breathy W sound - as if you were going to ask “what” or “why” but the words died on your lips as you took in Sirius’ many bags. 

“What did you bring?”

“I’ll show you everything if you just let me in.” He muttered as he motioned towards one of your nosey neighbours who had shoved her head out of her door when she first heard Sirius in the hall.

You peered around your doorframe and narrowed your eyes at her before allowing Sirius entry. 

“Finally.” Sirius teased as he moved to place his bags on your kitchen island. 

Sirius had never seen the inside of your flat, but if he had simply stumbled into your space by accident he would have known it was yours immediately. 

There was something so intrinsically you about your space that Sirius immediately felt at home too, even just for having stepped inside. 

“Sorry.” You chuckled somewhat awkwardly; bringing one of your hands to the back of your neck as you considered Sirius and all of his bags. “We’d just been watching some shows.”

Sirius immediately felt his heart fall out of his arse.

We? 

Had he read this completely wrong? Were you seeing someone? Was your home not simply yours, but one that you shared?

He found himself suddenly feeling quite defensive over your flat; it was too lovely, too wonderful, too comfortable for simply just anyone to enjoy.

“We?” He asked suddenly; tone taking on a bit of an edge he didn’t intend or consent to.

You cocked an eyebrow at him and pointed behind you with your thumb; Sirius followed your gesture to a little tabby cat perched on the back of your sofa, tilting its head at the two of you as if it, too, was confused by Sirius’ sudden intonation. 

“You were watching shows with your cat?” He clarified; his voice now breathy in relief. 

“Birdie loves shows.” You countered defensively. 

“You named a cat bird?”

“No.” You argued. “I named my kitten Birdie. Do you not like cats?” You asked then, a teasing smirk growing on your face. 

“I like cats fine; where can I put this?” He asked instead; hoping to god you didn’t notice the blush heating up his face. 

He started unloading the many take-away boxes he’d prepared for you at the restaurant before skiving off the rest of his shift.

“What is this?”

“Food.”

“Sirius, why did you-”

“I asked what helped.” Sirius explained. “You said food; I brought food. I’m not sure if you’ve noticed yet dollface, but food is kind of my thing.”

“Smartass.”

“That too.” He replied with a wink, moving to put the desserts in your fridge. 

“Did you seriously come all the way over here just to bring me food?” You asked disbelievingly as you joined Sirius at the counter and peered into the bags.

Sirius had to tamp down the giddiness that threatened to consume him at how sweet and domestic this felt; you clad in your comfies as you helped him unload groceries. 

“I didn’t come all the way over here just to bring you food…I brought other stuff too.” 

“‘Course you did.” You muttered quietly, looking at Sirius with a look in your eyes that he couldn’t quite decipher.

“Go lay down.” He ordered instead as he went about plating your food - opening cabinets at random until he found what he was looking for. “I don’t hear laying down!” He sing-songed when he saw you still  standing in his periphery. 

You harrumphed before acquiescing; picking up your cat who made a little brrp sound as if to second Sirius’ directions. 

Finally content with his efforts, he moved to stand in front of you with a glass of water and some pasta he brought from work. 

You made an appreciative hum and sat up, which seemed to displease Birdie greatly. “God, maybe I need to find myself a personal chef.”

“Oi! Don’t go replacing me now.” Sirius scolded as he perched himself on your coffee table - perhaps a little casual for being a first time (uninvited) guest in someone’s home - but you didn’t seem to mind.

“Oh the job is so yours chef; you’re welcome here anytime.” You said around a mouthful of food. And even though Sirius knew you were joking, he couldn’t help the giddy fluttering of his heart at the sentiment. 

“This is really good, Sirius, and super thoughtful; thank you.” You offered earnestly. 

“So I guess you don’t have any room for dessert, then?” He asked teasingly; his taunting smirk melting away immediately at the excitement that took over your face before he ran to retrieve it for you. 

“Why is she doing that?” Sirius asked after a while, gesturing towards Birdie with his chin who was rubbing her head against the leg of his pants.

“Why’s she doing what?” You asked bemusedly as Sirius fought every urge to wipe the little bit of chocolate from your upper lip. Unfortunately thankfully for him, you licked it out of his sight. 

“Head butting me; seems quite rude.” Sirius murmured as he watched the cat in bemusement. 

“That’s basically a cat hug, Sirius; she’s hugging you, or saying hello.” You chuckled at him.

“Get out.” He scoffed in disbelief. 

“Cats have little scent markers in their cheeks; when they rub against something, they’re affectionately claiming it as their own.”

“So like a dog pissing on trees?” He deadpanned.

“Affectionately claiming you as their own; offer her your hand, Sirius.”

“But what if she-”

“Chef, offer her your hand.” You barked at him with no heat. 

Sirius narrowed his eyes challengingly at you but did as he was told; pleasantly surprised when the cat moved the rubbing from his trousers to his hand. 

“Have you never met a cat before?” You asked as you considered him.

“No…I have.” Sirius offered slowly, admittedly enjoying the velvety soft fur of your little companion. 

“Could’ve fooled me.” You teased as you placed your now empty dish on the side table. 

“My family had a cat growing up; a horrid thing. I swear to god my mum taught him how to attack me. Loved my brother though, but was nasty as all get out to anyone else.” 

“Really? Was he a stray before he lived with you?”

“Nope.” Sirius offered with a pop of the p. “Raised that fucker from kittenhood. Lived a god awful long time too, just to spite me; I wished every year on my birthday that it would die.”

“Sirius!”

“I’m not joking! My brother and I would sneak cupcakes up to my room and he’d light a candle for me and tell me to make a wish. One of them was always ‘please for the love of god let Kreacher die before me’.” He didn’t think now was the time to admit that his other wish was always ‘please for the love of god let us make it out of here alive’. 

“That’s awful; you’re awful.” You laughed. 

“No, Kreacher was awful; I was but a boy.”

“I can’t believe you got after me for naming my cat Birdie when you had a cat named Kreacher.” 

“I didn’t have a cat named Kreacher, my brother did.” He responded haughtily. 

“Who named him?”

“I did.”

“Why?” You laughed again. 

“‘Cause he was a tiny, awful, hateful little gremlin and needed a name that said as much!” 

The two of you laughed until your hands migrated to your abdomen and you began massaging into your skin; a small divot appearing between your brows.

“What is it?” Sirius asked quietly then.

You tried to shake your head and offered him a tight smile. “S’okay.”

“Is it cramps?”

“Yeah.”

“Lie back.” He instructed as he stood from his seat on the coffee table - his mother would be rolling in her grave if she’d seen him with such a lack of manners.

Good.  

“Sirius, really, you’ve-”

“Lie back.” He whispered again, one hand on your shoulder as he gently guided you so that you were lying along your sofa with your head propped up on the armrest.

Stealing himself for perhaps embarrassing himself completely and making this whole precarious situation between the two of you go tits up, he finally shucked off his jacket and boots before rolling up the sleeves of his shirt and lowering himself onto the bottom half of your couch.

You watched silently as Sirius situated himself between your legs so that his shoulders and head rested on your abdomen as he weaselled his arms under your back, placing both of his palms up against your lower back.

“Relax.”

“What?”

“You’re tense as shit, doll; relax.” He murmured as he rested his cheek against your stomach.

You let out a breath and sank further into the couch as the two of you fell into comfortable silence.

“Thank you.” You whispered after a few moments.

“You already thanked me.” He whispered back.

“No, I-” You cut yourself off as you gathered your thoughts; a tentative hand absentmindedly making itself at home in his hair as you found your words. “Thank you.” You settled on.

“You’re welcome.” Sirius offered.

“Where’d you learn this?”

Sirius propped his chin up so he could at you; your hand pausing as your eyes flit to it as if you were only now realising what you’d been doing. “Learn what?”

“The pressure? The body heat. The…helping, with cramps?” You asked tentatively, and if Sirius didn’t know better, he’d think you perhaps looked a touch bashful at your questions - your eyes seemingly incapable of meeting his. 

And once again, Sirius found himself taking another jump, or rather, a complete leap of faith that could very well have this thing the two of you had been building crumble and fall before it even had a chance to start.

“Uhm, it was my brother, actually.” He admitted quietly.

Your eyes did finally meet his at that, where they narrowed a touch in confusion.

“You learned this….from your brother?” 

Sirius nodded as he swallowed nervously. “Right. He uhm, well, it often helped him with his cramps and such, so…yeah.” 

It was apparently his turn to be incapable of meeting your eyes as he moved his head so that it was resting against your stomach again.

“You’re a good brother.” You finally offered.

“Well of course I am.” Sirius offered through a breath of relief. “I’m good at everything I do.” 

“You’re a git.”

“I’m good at that too.”

You gave a disciplinary tug at Sirius’ hair which made him think of several sinful things he’d like to be doing with you whilst you did that next time, but he simply chuckled and sank further into you.

“I didn’t exactly sit like this with him, mind you.”

“No? What does that make me, then?”

“Special.” 

“I guess so.” You breathed out through a chuckle. “Coming over on your day off just to spoil me.”

“It wasn’t my day off.” He responded without thinking, tensing when he felt you suck in a breath.

“Sirius.”

“Mhm?” He offered in faux nonchalance.

“You left work for this!?”

“For you?” He asked as he considered you. “Absolutely.”

“For gods sake, Sirius. I bet Jeffery-” 

But he never got to hear what you thought of Jeffery as he let out a very petulant and dramatic groan and lowered his forehead to your stomach. 

“Babe, I know this isn’t exactly the same thing, but generally a man does not want to hear the name of another bloke when he’s in between your legs, yeah?”

You barked out a laugh and swatted at his shoulder. “You’re awful.”

“Terrible.”

“The worst.”

“Absolutely horrid.”

“Giving Kreacher a run for his money.”

Sirius’ head shot up at that as he levelled you with a warning glare. “Too far.”

“I’m sorry.” You laughed, not sounding particularly sorry at all.

“You better be.” Sirius grumbled as he lowered himself back down. “Now be a doll and play with my hair again; it’s nap time.”

And there was an equal chance that you were going to laugh, swat at him, or downright tell him to get his arse back to work.

But Sirius was admittedly overjoyed when you simply placed your fingers back into his hair and began to massage until you fell asleep; him not much longer after you.

[zu-is-here]

Zu, there's something I don't understand: Antis and ProShippers. I understand that the Pros are in favour of any kind of fictional ship, even controversial ones, and the Antis are not. But why just so much hatred towards each other. I mean, I've seen posts from Antis saying that Pros were disgusting (blah, blah, blah) because they liked incestuous ships for example. But I've also seen posts from Pros saying that Antis are just disrespectful people who harass people as soon as we manage to not mix fiction (the "problematic" ships with fictional characters) with reality (what we think would happen if it actually happened in our world) ≧〔゜゜〕≦

That's not really what Antis is about. I mean, it's just not being comfortable with "problematic" ships, it's just listening to your triggers (and/or for some, your values). That's not mean I think Pro's don't have values (on the contrary, some of them have more values than Antis. It's not because you like this or that ship that you have more or less values) ヾ(-_-;)

For example, I think I'm partly Anti. Because ships that talk about pedophilia (and more often than that glorify it instead of condemning it) make me really uncomfortable. The worst are those who blame the child, that really irritates me quickly. But I try as hard as I can to stay away from this kind of subject and content, I'm not going to insult an artist, harass them or display their art as repugnant ٩꒰･ัε･ั ꒱۶

Plus I know that even though I don't appreciate it when Dream and Nightmare are brothers and ship together, there are strangely exceptions: like they're not brothers in the story, or if they're artists I appreciate their art. Basically, the fact that it's an artist I like is going to play a part, because I'm not really going to look at the ship, just the art itself. If it's a post where you can imply that it's just platonic, or just brotherly love without anything more, I'll do it o(´^｀)o

I know it can be seen as a cowardly thing to say. Like, just because it's an artist I like, I decide to close my eyes and pretend it's just platonic. But I know that most of the time these artists do it in a sensible way, like it's not a toxic relationship and they're both OK with it. On the other hand, when it comes to pedophile ships, I just can't "tell the difference" as some people like to say, but I don't see what the problem is with just not wanting to see that kind of content（▼へ▼メ）

Like when I first joined the fandom, I enjoyed the SwapDream x Nightmare ship. But I grew up, I evolved like everyone else. And like everyone else, I asked myself what I liked and didn't like. And in almost five years, well, there are things I don't appreciate any more, while others have evolved differently and aren't bothered by it. So yes, maybe I'm being hypocritical because I'm turning my coat, but I decided to ask myself what I liked or didn't like and to follow my answer. Even though things have changed since I first arrived in this fandom, I decided to listen to what I liked and what I thought (=｀ェ´=)

I think Antis and Pros are just the same: they've decided to follow their own reasoning. The Antis feel that even if it's fiction, they're not comfortable with that kind of ship, and the Pros have decided that fiction should remain fiction and that we don't need to see anything more than that. So I don't understand why all this hatred towards each other.

There are extremes of course, on both sides. But that's what people don't seem to want to see: there are extremes in everything. There are extremes in every fandom, there are even extremes in 'real life'. People focus so much on the extremes that if you dare to be Anti you're a closed-minded stalker, and if you're a Pro you're someone who encourages that kind of relationship in the real world ┐(‘～`；)┌

I know I've been expressing myself badly all along, but I'm really sick of seeing posts from Anti people who say that all Pros are disgusting people who only encourage problematic relationships in front of young people who are easily influenced, or Pros who consider all Antis to be stalkers who can't understand that it's only fiction ヾ(￣~￣;)ﾉ

Basically, if we're in a fandom, it's just because we like this universe, so instead of focusing on this or that person who likes this ship (and that's bad, yikes), or that or that person who doesn't like it (and they're just closed-minded), we should just be interested in and enjoy this universe in the peace and quiet of our own corner (;° ロ°)

I'm sorry if that sounds like I'm angry and venting my anger at you. That's really not the case, it's just that I know you're a ProShipper but you've never denigrated Antis. So I thought it might be a good thing to talk to someone with a different point of view from me without being afraid of getting hate just because I think differently. And I also know that it calms me to talk to you. I'm really sorry if you took it the wrong way, that really wasn't my aim p(´⌒｀｡q)

Thank you so much for your trust and patience, I appreciate it a lot (⊃｡•́‿•̀｡)⊃♡

You say the right things from the heart, and there's nothing coward about admitting that you have every right to choose what you want to enjoy or not ☆

It is right to decide for yourself!╰(*´︶`*)╯ Problems start when you decide for others.

Without the labels, we're all the same: we came here to enjoy the content. This way, antis & proshippers could coexist peacefully, but some choose to judge others because they feel uncomfortable about things others enjoy, thereby provoking a response, etc.

Sometimes it is hard to try to understand each other, mostly because this would mean accepting others' point of view as equal and valid. But even with things we can't understand, we should always stay respectful to each other — that's the key ♡

[luna-lovegreat]

I started playing Wind Waker! Y'all want some thoughts?

-Why is the first thing I learned how to do with Link crawling on the ground like a sneaky sneak?

-Why is the SECOND thing I figured out how to do Link sidling along a wall like a sneaky sneak?

This kid is a sneaky sneak sneak!!!!

-Why is Link instantly jumping on people's tables? Get down please sir

-Wind and his family are so sweet I love them so much- and Aryll got kidnapped noooo TT

-Tetra has shot Link from a catapult

**I'm just gonna keep editing this post and adding random thoughts as I go does that sound cool? I wanna do that @hero-of-the-wolf

-Tetra's winking at Link has my heart forever she's so cute I swear

-love the glowy blue talking rock btw yesss stalker pirate girl

-Link why do you yell so loud every time you jump this is a sneak mission I thought you'd be good at this

-the game grumps on YouTube saved my life tho bc im a coward and get way too nervous in places like the forsaken fortress and watching someone else swear through the area before I do it helps ok

-Wind is such a gremlin but he's actually so polite? Like he instantly bowed to the sword trainer and then to the guy on windfall island after paying for breaking his pots- before running out of the house at breakneck speed. He's such a sweet and polite boy you can tell he's grandmas kid- yet he's such a menace what a wild yet polite lad ridndkkfkdg

-the people of windfall island are way too judgy stop being condescending to Link he's my baby. 'The Tipsters' girls have my heart tho because they.. they... well they give you tips. Tip you off you could say

-I think the King of Red Lions just legally adopted Link

Ok so small rant section but this game is so tragic. Like the art style is so goofy and fun but it hits you so hard that these are KIDS. Link is freaking twelve and his sister was kidnapped on his birthday, leaving him to follow in hot clothes because of higher defence I'm guessing (new hero clothes are more suitable for an adventure than casual loose ones but still!). But he's literally like half the height of DOORKNOBS- he has to stand on his tiptoes anytime to open doors. He is so very small.

My mom was like 'I love this animation style - does it help with your nerves that it's lighter?' And I was like 'honestly it makes me feel more deeply the tragedy of what should be a happy childhood being torn apart' but she's used to me saying weird shit like that so it's fine

-I think we as a fandom are severely underestimating how much of a gremlin Wind waker link can be and that's saying a LOT

-I got the Wind Waker!

-WHY IS IT SO HARD TO CONTROL DONT YOU LECTURE ME ON RHYTHM IM LITERALLY A MUSICIAN WHAT THE HECK

-K learned the Wind Waker

-Ok I like got to dragon roost island on the first day and FINALLY got an empty bottle my beautiful baby where were you??

-I cleaned- like actually fully dusted and cleaned- my wii u for the first time after it was inactive for years and holy mother of improved game pad controls

-is it wierd that I'm more excited about the empty bottle than the wind waker?

. . . .

-ya know in hindsight gabon looked pretty shady. I mean he was standing in the shade but what kind of asshole stands there and tells a giant bird to throw a child in the ocean

-I think ganodonk is dumb I can't wait to get the sword and bitch slap him

-'we cANt set SaiL aGain Until you geT a GLowY thiNgy' well mr boat man sir have you considered that I realised there was most definitely a heart piece or two I forgot on windfall island and I'm doing another dungeon with three hearts? At least I got a bottle ig

-why am I trading with rats for potions this doesn't seem hygienic. I know rats are in fact very clean animals but this dungeons isn't and why do the rats want rupees anyways?

-WAIT WHY CAN LINK TALK TO RATS

-so there's this like steamy glowy pot that teleports me to the start/end of the dungeon? I'm questioning all existence in this world why is that a thing. Honestly think Twilight princess's bald teleportation chicken made more sense but whatever

. . . .

-I saved the dragon! By riding on his tail? What a boss fight that was fun. Got a shiny thingy Yayy

-So the wind waker! I learned to change the direction of the wind which is so cool and also to change whether it's night or day. Which is wayyy too much power for this kid how come no one told me he could change night and day?

-That said I love how musical Link is. Like when he looks so happy waving the baton playing to the wind it's just really cool

- Why is the God of Wind a like. Toad surfer dude. Whatever, I like him.

-So apperently there's these little dudes called fish-men who are talking fish who fill out your sea chart- I am still questioning why link can talk to animals but that's fine

-I missed out on pawprint isle before apparently, so I'm gonna do that before whatever the red lion king tells me next

-Also I love Beedle in this game so far he hasn't threatened me like the other beedles in games I've played

. . . .

-I GOT MY SECOND EMPTY BOTTLE

-Sailing through the ocean is really fun

-I went back to windfall and got a 'swift sail' that lets me go faster but I still like the blue one better

-I reached the great deku tree! He had monsters for pimples and I couldn't figure out how to get them off 'what are you doing?!?! go help him!!' IM TRYING ADOPTIVE BOAT FATHER. Turns out I needed to roll into him and not use the grappling hook which makes sense but still

-He. Grew me a leaf. A magic blowy leaf. Which is great it's an awesome gift and means a lot but the Deku tree grunted and grew a leaf for me and that's kinda wierd right?

-Reaching said leaf was a PAIN and I am very impressed with Wind Waker Link.

Hang on rant session. Bro's tiny little grandmas boy but flipping through the air to reach an unspeakably high up leaf is chill. He flipped through leafy child cannons a billion times to reach the Deku leaf and didn't get dizzy or give up even after falling. And that's saying nothing of how he picked up a sword for the first time and swings his way through EVERYTHING thrown at him. Gosh he's so cool I love this Link

-I HAVE MAGIC NOW!!!!! With like a little meter and stuff tidkkfdjfnkdjfkd I'm very excited that I have magic

-Reaching this high shelf with my path forward was a pain but I have to save and quit rn so if it puts me back at the start of this room I will be. Upset.

-It put me back at the start of the room.

-I ordered a game guide! I'm gonna try and play through with it- this'll be my first time using one. But I haven't updated for a few days bc I'm waiting on it :)

This whole post is a bunch of random thoughts jumping around which my adhd self appreciates- that said I really love that we can grab an enemies weapon and use it against them. Increases my respect for ww Link even more- when he had no weapon in the forsaken fortress he grabs a literal wooden stick from an enemy and kills it with. A big twig. Kid's brutal and does what it takes which is so crazy. Also using an enemies sword is great hehe shiny

. . . .

-Got game guide. Yayyyy

-The forbidden woods are scary but they remind me a lot of the forest temple in twilight princess. A lot. The mechanics are also very similar. I love Zelda games

-Maybe it's because the only time I've had free to play rn has been at night, but I find myself constantly thinking this game is creepy. It's so unsettling for a cartoon style- the boko babas freaking eat link! And chew on him like no!! Fisnfjskfkfk *shudder* aaaanyways I am NOT looking forward to redeads in this game but that's a later problem right?

-I figured out how to get the treasure chests from the sea!! And got a piece of heart :DDD

-Ok game guides are really helpful

-Apparently the 'warp pots' are a consistent thing- I guess that's just how Link teleports in dungeons in this game. The second pot is generally hidden a bit but then you can teleport to the beginning of the dungeon and back- then the third pot is near the end... I think. This is only my second dungeon in this game with the pots but it's going great! I'm learning a lot hehe

-I love the grappling hook so much. I can farm spoils/materials from monsters with it before I kill them and I love that. Also it makes me feel cool swinging it.

-WDYM I CAN GET FREE BLUE POTIONS FROM A KOROK USING EASILY ATTAINABLE (with the grappling hook) MATERIALS FROM BOKO BABAS THIS IS JOY THIS IS LOVE IT GIVES ME HEALTH A N D MAGIC FJDKFJFK

-Also the title screen theme and animation play around outset is very satisfying. Watched it replay three times tonight before starting the game. Time well spent.

-I appreciate the items so much. The Deku Leaf is great like I can F L Y with magic and also blow wind at enemies and make them look silly <3

-The look of Link's spoils bag has grown on me and I love it. Purple.

. . . .

-I got the boomerang!!! Oh my gosh it's so cool I love it.

-I've been trying out the switch mechanic for targeting rather than hold. It's going interestingly bc I've only ever held for targeting before. But I think I like it

-The evil flower ate Makar- the Korok I'm TRYING to save GIVE HIM BACK

-That was the prettiest boss fight ever. I couldn't even be intimidated, I don't think I've ever been more relaxed during a boss fight lol. They should make all of them purple and blue sparkly- it was legitimately beautiful.

-I finished the forbidden forest dungeon!! :DD yayyy

-Link's hopping up and down in celebration after the boss fight was so cute he's so happy!!

-Have I mentioned I'm excited about the boomerang

-Makar is so cute?!?! I love him with his little violin and- the Koroks oh my heart that was the cutest ceremony ever

. . . .

-Ok so I went around the great sea, for now avoiding the big octos I am uhh terrified interested to meet, went to a place that got 'corrupted by gannorks power' so now I'm following the pirates back to windfall island

-The pirates are stealing bombs and I think this is illegal.

-My girl Tetra's here!! :D also doing illegal stuff! And Link is just watching them rob the bomb shop lol these cutscenes are the best sometimes also I love the pirate banter

-Tetras little smile and wink when she saw Link was so cute I love her. Also the little hints that she was concerned about his island and not just treasure?? Sweet

-I stole the bombs that the pirates stole from the pirates. And getting there was a PAIN with swinging on the ropes the tiny pirate (Niko) made Link do

-TETRA is a STALKER she was watching Link through the glowy rock thingy- probably cause he was just sneaking around watching her rob a shop but still that thing scares me sometimes when her voice just comes screaming out of it

-Btw why do the pirates want the god pearl thingy anyways? Just cause it's really shiny orrr

-ok we're headed to outset! I'm so excited to get back to Link's home hehe. Also I think Tetra just dared Link to a race bc she was like 'we'll get there first we still have bombs' so yeah anyways she's spending the night here tho so I'm sure it'll be fine.

-I don't like the great sea as much when it's raining and thunderstorming all over :/ I hope it doesn't stay like this? Because that would suck

-I got sucked into a cyclone and was panicking cause it threw me across the great sea BUT then it threw me onto outset!! :D so that was uhh. Handy I guess.

-Ohhh ok so like. time is frozen from ganad's current curse, which means it's gonna stay night for right now, so tetra won't be coming in time to get the treasure from the god dude first. Nice.

-The Lion King just kindly told Link to visit his family and chill for a second and check on his island?? Sobbing yes thank you sir

-Grandma's sick oh no this is the saddest thing I've ever seen ima cry. I healed her with a fairy but she was so sad link and aryll were gone im- and then grandma blamed herself for not being there for them like no it's literally cold and rainy all the time it's frozen right now you have every right to get sick- and then she made Link soup and she'll remake it for him which is great and I LOVE LINKS GRANDMA SO MUCH it was so sad she was sick I'm glad I could heal her :))

-Link smiled and nodded so enthusiastically when Grandma told him to stay out of trouble/stay safe like Link you are a liar I just watched you steal from pirates

-I sparred with Orca and I like him. It's cool how he trains Link on his home Island with like formal training because Link definitely needs it with what he's facing

-Controlled a seagull for the first time. That was fun they can fly for such a long time like. Forever?? Idk I eventually stopped

[chuuyrr]

Hello I would like make a request for BSD x Gojo! Reader, with the “Decay Of Angels” if you don’t mind.

In a story where all of the Mans in the “Decay Of Angels” (excluding Fukuchi) being fanboys to Gojo! Reader. Just like Miwa Kasumi being a fangirl to Gojo Satoru.

Make it separate please. Thank you 😊

paparazzi

bungou stray dogs x gojo! reader

masterlist of infinity

╰➤ CW(s): spoilers for bungou stray dogs, crack-ish and slight ooc! decay of angels (i don't really write for them)

╰➤ SYNOPSIS(s): a terrorist organization that specializes as a murder association can't help but take their eyes on the strongest ability user, or in which they simp for you.

╰➤ PAIRING(s): fyodor dostoevsky, nikolai gogol, sigma (separately with different scenarios)

excluding bram stoker and fukuchi as well because i honestly don't know how to write for them. also, i'm still quite new in writing for fyodor, nikolai and sigma, since i'm still catching up with the manga. despite them acting like miwa, i still stuck with their actual characters, but hopefully it's ok ! also, thanks for requesting anon dear ♡

being gojo [name], it's no surprise that you're quick to swoon people, may it be guys or girls.

one of their favorite things to do is literally gathering information and analyzing your every move. probably creepy, but not only were they keen on convincing you to join them, they really just wanted to see and adore you upclose, and when they do, may it be from a far in camera or personally, they're losing it in the inside.

apart from possessing sugawara michizane's six eyes and the limitless ability that makes you the strongest ability user alive, you're very charismatic person, and the decay of the angel is no exception to that. the instant they found and learned about you, they were stoked. they instantly became your biggest fans, despite being a terrorist organization that specializes as a murder association.

nikolai gogol !

nikolai is a die-hard fan of yours. he's head over heels in love with you, and he's a lot like miwa kasumi. he gets all giddy and excited as soon as he sees you, but unlike miwa, who is discreet, he is openly expressive.

"goodness, if it isn't an angel sent from above?" nikolai's calm demeanor crumbled when he saw you. he just can't help it.

nikolai practically pushes everyone around you aside and approaches you without hesitation or shame.

you weren't even on a mission. you were simply walking around yokohama by yourself when you were approached by a white-layered haired man dressed as a circus ringmaster. you watched as he pushed the man next to you away without hesitation before bowing with his hand to his chest and lifting his hat in respect.

"gojo [name], it's an honor to finally see you in person!" nikolai exclaimed a little too enthusiastically and theatrically.

behind your black round sunglasses, your eyes widened slightly. oh, how peculiar. he already recognizes you. perhaps a stalker? well, it's nothing to be alarmed about. you're type of person who eats death threats from higher-ups for breakfast—this was not actually a big deal, so you went along with it.

you proceeded to hold a baffled expression as you tapped your chin in a thoughtful manner, "oh, my. do i know you, kind sir?"

"hohoho, let me introduce myself! my name is nikolai gogol. i've heard everything about you dear! you're the heir of the gojo family and i'm a huge fan," he exclaimed enthusiastically, "do you mind if i quiz you, dove?"

"quiz me?" you tilted your head to the side, practically making nikolai squeal on the inside from how charming and adorable you were up close, especially when you did that—perfect, your charms were working well on him.

"mhm! it is but a simple question," nikolai hummed and chuckled softly as he nodded.

"alright then, go ahead," you smiled at him kindly as you clasped your hands together.

"a vase is what this usually adorns. be careful as it may have some thorns! but even so, it is as beautiful as a ravishing woman like you," nikolai declared with a wink.

it was a riddle.

"hmm, vase? thorns? beautiful?" you furrowed your brows and held your chin between your fingers, thinking of an answer. you snapped your fingers as you smiled at him, "ah, a rose!"

"ding ding!" chimed nikolai happily, and with that, he pulled a bouquet of roses from his overcoat and handed it to you, which made you gasp softly as he continued, "a beautiful rose, for a beautiful lady."

"well, aren't you quite the charmer?" your lips curved into a smile as you pushed your glasses down slightly, just enough for your blue six eyes to stare at him, "thank you, nikolai!"

nikolai found himself giddy at the prospect of seeing you this close up, especially those gorgeous eyes of yours, let alone hearing his name spill from your plump lips. you were truly as lovely as a rose, perhaps even more so.

however, as soon as he saw a familiar man approaching you from a distance, his eyes narrowed slightly. it appeared that it was now time for him to flee. his expression changed immediately as he extended his hand for you to take, and in return, he bent down and kissed your knuckles as he gently grasped your hand, catching you somewhat off guard.

"it is truly an honor to see you in person," nikolai exclaimed before smiling and pulling away.

"gojo-chan!" you turned around to see ranpo running towards you, holding his hat and huffing for air as he came to a halt.

"ah, ranpo-kun! what are you doing here?" you asked, blinking.

"it's urgent. i need to discuss something with you," ranpo said, his eyes widening slightly as he looked at the bouquet of roses in your hands, "eh, were you on a date or something?"

"nope. this kind man gave this bouquet of roses to m—your eyes widened as soon as you turned around and found nikolai gone without a trace.

"what man?" ranpo raised a brow at you suspiciously.

you lowered your black round sunglasses to scan your surroundings, but nikolai gogol had vanished without a trace. despite the vast perception your six eyes provides you, you couldn't see him from a mile away.

he was really gone.

you then returned your attention to the bouquet of roses he had just given you, only to discover a small card tied to one of the roses that read,

"i apologize, dove, but i have a show to run. don't worry, we will meet again, gojo [name]."

after reading, you froze and found yourself clutching the bouquet tightly.

this card appeared seemingly out of nowhere.

sigma !

sigma, unlike nikolai gogol, is the true miwa kasumi type. he fanboys for you more on the inside than on the outside due to his casino manager reputation, aside from being a part of the decay of angels.

"it that... gojo [name]?" the young man muttered himself, surprised.

sigma noticed you from afar as a customer in the sky casino—his very own casino—due to your ever-familiar black round sunglasses and signature snow-white hair. sigma's eyes widened and he found himself bobbing his adam's apple. you weren't even dressed in your usual attire. you were dressed elegantly in a sleeveless black dress with a slit exposing one of your thighs and matching black heels.

how could he possibly have missed your name? sigma was certain he had memorized his casino's customers because he was the manager. unless, of course, this is your first time here; it has to be your first time. he had never seen you here before, and based on your information, you work for heiwa in tokyo.

you, on the other hand, were sipping a soda that had been served to you because you don't drink alcohol as you casually flirted and smooth-talked this one customer, discreetly learning about this sky casino.

it may not appear so, but you were on a mission right now. heiwa, your organization in charge of tokyo, asked you to look into any leads related to the books.

sigma followed you as soon as you finished talking with the said man; he was envious of how close the said man was to you. you, on the other hand, could not help but smile.

you got the manager of the sky casino's attention exactly as you planned.

you set your drink down, handing it to one of the establishment's waiters, and smiled as you watched sigma approach you, nearly tripping on his heels. his heart was racing and his mind was pounding.

oh my god.

you just smiled at him.

"yes?" you sweetly asked, watching as sigma gathered himself, clearing his throat as he faced you. you were making him nervous.

"p-pardon me, gojo [name]-san," he cleared his throat, "as the manager of the sky casino, i would just like to check in my casino's customers. that man wasn't bothering you, was he?" sigma asked, glancing at the man you were talking to earlier.

oh, my. well isn't he a bold one?

aren't customers in this establishment coded? hmm, the fact that this man knew your name could only mean one thing—this person is well aware of who you are, whether as a member of heiwa or a descendant of sugawara michizane, or maybe as the head of the gojo family. but you maintained your cool as you acknowledged him.

"oh, so you're the manager!" you exclaimed, resting your chin between your thumb and index fingers, "no worries. he wasn't bothering me at all. thank you for the concern. goodness, i should commend you. i'm not really one for casinos and all that gambling, but this establishment sure is accommodating and well kept in order. you seem very capable, and you even check on your customers!"

sigma's eyes widened. he was caught off guard. oh my goodness. his heart was screaming. you simply complimented him.

'gojo [name] commended me. gojo thinks i'm capable,' he thought, fighting back a flush that was forming and spreading across his face.

you were making him fall in love with you so easily. good god. just how were you doing that?

"would you like to share a drink or two with me, mr. manager?" you asked, tilting your head and using your charm. you mentally smirked as you watched sigma's adam's apple bob up and down. this guy was a big fan of yours it seems.

"only if it's okay with you though! you must be a busy man," you chuckled later, "it's just that I've been meaning to talk to you."

"r-really now?" sigma blinked profusely.

"you see, i'm from tokyo, and a colleague of mine mentioned the sky casino being a worthwhile place to visit here in yokohama," you skillfully lied, your voice smooth as silk, "so places i've never been to or heard of before really interest me, so i was wondering if i could perhaps hear of this establishment's background perhaps? i'm genuinely curious."

"i don't mind at all, gojo-san," a smile graced his lips, "it would be an honor to enlighten you,"

"really? why, thank you! you really are dependable!" you clasped your hands together.

you then gave him a closed-eye smile, which caused sigma to blush furiously, causing him to cover his face and turn away from you, pretending to cough when you opened your eyes and straightened your posture.

fyodor dostoevsky !

now, fyodor is not as expressive and open compared to sigma and, especially, nikolai. in fact, he's very discreet. fyodor is similar to miwa in that he maintains his cool and calm at all costs despite his feelings for you.

it was a moonlit, dark night. you had just finished business in yokohama and were now craving some sweets due to your sweet tooth, and what better way to satisfy your cravings than to satisfy your cravings? it is possible to get some at your favorite coffee shop even if it is late at night. you cheerfully pushed the glass doors, the doorbell chiming upon contact.

fyodor was already outside the coffee shop when you walked in, having arrived only a few minutes before you. with the decay of the angel almost always watching you and your fondness for restaurants and shops selling sweets, it was quite easy to track where you frequently went.

fyodor wasn't the type to go wherever he pleased in public, but he'd been meaning to see you up close, not just through a camera or screen.

after ordering a slice of red velvet cake and a matcha crepe cake, as well as your preferred iced coffee, you took the only available seat by the window and clutched your receipt, waiting for your order. fyodor decided to order at the cashier as well, and then he decided to look around, pretending to look for a vacant seat despite already knowing you had already taken the last one.

fyodor smiled at the sight of you, sitting on the cozy chair, your heavenly blue six eyes drawn towards the full moon outside as you leaned your head against your knuckles, elbows propped on the arm of the chair, and legs crossed over one another—such grace.

"excuse me," your eyes widened slightly. the stranger's russian accent easily caught your attention.

fyodor felt a little nervous now that you were staring at him from head to toe. he couldn't help but be swooned by how intently you were staring at him, especially when you pulled down your sunglasses and stared at him with your heavenly six eyes. you were simply stunning.

"yes?" your lips curved into a friendly smile.

"do you mind if i sit with you?" fyodor asked, motioning over the other tables that were occupied to reason.

"sure, i don't mind," you replied nonchalantly with a shrug of your shoulders, looking around to see that despite the late hour, the coffee shop was packed, making fyodor extremely pleased with your response.

just then, one of the pick-up staff members called your name, along with another, as two trays were served, "orders for [name] and fedya are ready at the bar!" the man said.

"that my order; do you mind if you stay here while i go get it?" you exclaimed, standing up from your seat, but fyodor gently grabbed your shoulder, forcing you to stay.

"i'll get yours, mine's ready at the bar as well," fyodor reasoned, giving you a closed-eye smile. you tried to object, but he shook his head and insisted, "just think of it as my way of repaying your kindness in allowing me to sit with you."

you couldn't help but crease your brows as fyodor walked away to pick up your orders. that man had an odd allure, but you noticed he was quite attractive—shoulder length black hair and sharp deep purple eyes—even his clothing choices were odd, but you weren't going to judge. you straightened your back in either case as he returned to the table, smiling as he handed you your drink and sweets.

"your name's fedya, right?" you suddenly asked.

fyodor's eyes widened slightly as something within him ignited when you said his nickname—even if he may or may not have planned it when he ordered his drink.

but, goodness gracious.

it sounded so good to hear it from you.

"no, my name's fyodor, dear," oops. there was a slip, but oh, well. you don't seem to mind the small endearment anyway. hehe.

"oh," you remarked with interest, smiling with a hint of mischief, "well, thank you, fedya."

fyodor stifled a small chuckle as he sat down on the seat across you, "my name's fyodor, dear."

"well, yeah, but fedya sounds cuter," you exclaimed as you sipped your drink, "plus, if you don't want me to call you that, you should have given your real name instead."

"well, you're not wrong," fyodor smiled and waved it away as he sipped the tea he ordered.

"you're not from around here, are you?" you pointed out, as you ate a piece of your red velvet cake, "your name and accent are russian."

"yes, i'm just visiting," fyodor replied, leaning back against his seat, his hands intertwined on his lap, "yokohama's an interesting city."

"i guess i agree with you on that," you shrugged, nodding in agreement.

as you two ate and drank, fyodor continued to converse with you. to be honest, there was nothing hidden behind fyodor purposefully bumping into you. he just wanted to see you up close and talk to you, and he couldn't help but be amused by how you're talking and hanging out with him—you knew what he was up to.

even if you were being playful and casual, fyodor could see and sense your passive-aggression, especially when he started talking about ability users and how sinful man is.

you may appear to be a charming and chatty young lady, but you were gojo [name].

he knows about you. how could he not? not when the decay of the angel had been eyeing for some time now. apart from possessing a dangerously strong ability and the six eyes altogether, fyodor even knows how you came from a wealthy family—a clan that you head—and he knows exactly how to push your buttons.

"all that self-righteous talk you're getting there, tch, not really a fan of it," you scoffed as you stirred your drink, your eyes narrowing slightly.

"but when you look at me like that with those eyes of yours, my love," fyodor murmured quietly as he sipped his tea, "i sure am a fan."

"uh, what did you say?" you wondered, tilting your head, "i didn't quite catch that."

"nothing, dear," fyodor said with a closed-eye smile and a wave of his hand to dismiss it.

[moriitis]

Stalker!Toby Rogers x Fem!Reader PT.1

im only writing this bc its been in my head for days i might write more.....,,, also this is very very very inspired by YOU on Netflix and toby's mannerisms very much match joe goldbergs...!!! watch it, its amazing. this is in Toby's pov! [Y/N] -> your name minors DNI! tw// stalking, perversion, breaking and entering, murder, obsession, submissive shit.

[Y/N].. Oh, [Y/N]. Can you not see how perfect we would be for each other? We'd be cute as old people, right? I mean, you can see it? Because I can. But I'm getting ahead of myself, I mean fuck.. You don't even know I'm stood here in your room right now watching you sleep and I'm imaging us growing old together already? You'd be cute still, I'd still love you. I'll be honest [Y/N], I only came here tonight to end your life but.. nobody mentioned how beautiful you are! Toby's gaze glanced down to the floor beneath him.

Ok, you're a messy person, I get it [Y/N] but I'd seriously be perfect for you. I'd clean this mess while you get to sleep in another hour. Carefully, he stepped around the odd piles of your clothing that littered your wooden floor. He was quiet, a prey stalking his meal, eyes glued on your sleeping figure. His eyes trailed, your beautiful hair, the way some strands attached to your face. Your face twisted a little in your sleep as your stirred, causing the man to freeze. What are you dreaming of [Y/N]? I'd do anything to get inside that pretty, little head of yours. What is haunting you, disturbing your sleep? Your bed is so small but I just want to slip in beside you, comfort you. That's what lovers do after all. A moment passed and you were still, motionless as you slept the night away. It was safe and Toby let out a small trembled breath as his eyes trickled down to your hips. It was hard to suppress his tics as the excitement ravaged away at his very being. [Y/N], how could you know that you left your bathroom window open? That's okay, that's a morning problem but you know, I'd make sure it's always locked if we were together. So creeps don't get in.

My god, you are perfect. You wore such little clothing for me, right? Those shorts are doing nothing, [Y/N]. I mean, if they are gonna rile up so much, I might as well take them off for you, huh? There was an urge that nibbled away at Toby as his eyes undressed you in that bed, an urge to step closer, to reach out and feel the softness of your skin beneath his fingertips and just as he was about to take a step forward, he stopped and his gaze paused to a certain object to the floor. His brow raised, your dirty panties? It was hard to contain his smirk. [Y/N], [Y/N], [Y/N]... Well, I mean.. If we're going to go this far. Did you leave this for me? Toby leant down and let the fabric slip between his fingers as he picked it up. He caressed the article of clothing for a moment, silk, soft. His jaw tensed, like he was trying everything in his very being to control his feelings. There was no hesitation when Toby buried his nose into the fabric of your underwear, inhaling the sweet scent you left behind. His shoulders shuddered as he stifled a groan. There was a twitch that stirred in his own pants and he quickly used his other hand to grab hold of his cock, a desperate attempt to calm himself down which actually did the opposite. With a gentle groan, Toby noticed you squirm a little again and spun yourself around to now face him. [Y/N], do you know I'm here? You look so beautiful. This moment was too good, so in quick haste, Toby grabbed his phone and found himself slowly drop to his knees. His heart raced as his made his way toward you, admiring every feature upon your delicate face. Pulling up the camera, he aimed the lens toward your figure and began to snap some photos. Just a little something for later, hope you don't mind but partners take photos of one another sleeping all the time! Plus, I just want to remember how you look but then again, that won't be a problem considering I know where you live. A strand of your hair fell and dropped down in front of your face. Toby instinctively reached out but paused, his fingers lingering just in front of the strand. He wanted to sigh but contained it, squeezing his eyes in frustration. Too soon, [Y/N]. Can't let you know I'm here, but that's okay! I'll see you again.

i will write more i just really needed to get this out of my system

[swtnrcmnt]

୨୧ — s.r x singer!r; headcanons (1)

pairing: post prison!spencer x singer!reader

feeding into my daydreams..

also, this was prompted by scrolling through radiant-reid's spencer x famous!reader posts which i love because they simply fuel my daydreams even more :)) enjoy !

probably met on a case or something of that sort. he also studied in la at one point so they possibly could have met through a mutual friend but tbh her being a target is most likely!

penelope is obviously a very big fan. like out of all the people on the team, she's probably the one who listens to y/n's music the most, maybe even went to one of her concerts

oh my god just think about the sweet little love songs. :'(( ugh imagine spence getting all flustered when it gets released and the whole team is just playing the song 24/7 to tease him

most likely didn't have any social media beforehand. but after dating y/n he decided to get instagram or maybe twitter just to see her posts and literally only post her on his feed because she's just so pretty and cute to post

oh my.. imagine the fans the first time y/n ever posts a photo of spencer in a photo dump !! and his reaction to all the comments and tweets, he's just so confused why people want him to hit them with a truck he's like ??? "that would be fatal, why would they thank me for that?"

also yes this is post prison reid because he was just 10x hotter than he already was once he was released. argue with the wall.

guys !! award shows with spencer !! that would be everything !!

he would be so supportive of every win too :(( even if you were only nominated or just there to perform he would still be so so proud as if you did win something

he's for sure for sure the first person to hear every song. unless it's about him. those one's are usually a surprise.

ugh imagine putting a soundbite of him somewhere in a song. maybe at the end or beginning and it's just a small bit of a voicemail or video that you two filmed together just having fun. or possibly something spicy but... shhhhhhhhh

comes to every fitting, every rehearsal. hell, maybe even on tour as well if he gets time off from the bau. especially since he would already be used to the whole 'flying around every other day' thing from cases.

whenever they have a case in california he always always makes sure to stay behind a few days to hang out with you especially because him being in dc and always travelling for work would mean long distance

and if you're not on tour you decide to stay in dc for a while or even move there (while still having property in california) so that you get to be with him anytime he's home

having a concert in dc !! ofc he invites everyone (as if garcia wasn't already planning on going anyway lmaoo) so they could all see and probably meet you

if this is pre prison!reid, and hotch was still unit chief, he would for sure give spence a whole lecture about how careful he has to be with dating somebody with such a high profile profession, because he knows how high risk celebrities are to stalkers and home invasions

the whole team is very very supportive of them though, even if it's long distance because they find a way to make it work.

also best believe she gets spence an actual iPhone as a gift so that they can facetime when either one of them is away

him playing the piano in one of your songs awhhhh :( and he has writing or producing credits on it

you already know that whoever is driving puts on y/n's music just to tease him. ESPECIALLY IF IT'S A SPICY SONG ehehehe

ugh but if it's a really sad song for example "decode" by sabrina carpenter (which is absolutely heartbreaking lyrically but i highly recommend u listen to it) he gets all sad because he knows exactly what it's about and remembers when you first wrote it

ok i have to stop myself before i go absolutely ham on headcanons. i have so many thoughts about this trope.

hope u enjoyed !

part two | part three

[ozwriterchick]

A Joe Burrow Story...

A/Note: My first RPF, well the first I've published. I normally write Marvel (Steve, Bucky, Sam) but decided to try my hand at something a little different.

I hope you like it, if you do, please like, reblog and leave me some feedback (kindly would be appreciated..)

Fic inspired by @burreaux-drys - thank you for your amazing writing, even if it is "all over the place"

I do not own the characters in this story except the OFC/OC characters mentioned.

I do not give permission for my work to be copied, translated or in any other way taken/stolen.

Characters: Joe Burrow; OFC!Reader; OC!Readers Best Friend; Mentions of other Bengal players; OC Bengal team members (kind of)

Warnings: Mentions of stalking; Shy reader; Police; that's about it except Joe Burrow I think deserves his own warning (in a good way); Not Beta'd so any mistakes are my own

W/C: 2748

Reader’s pov

I watched the players on the field, easily singling out the one I’d come to see.  It really wasn’t that difficult, he stood out with his mop of dirty blonde hair and the number 9 on his jersey.

My eyes roved down his body to his slim but manly hips and back up again to his broad shoulders, made even broader by the padding in his practice uniform.

He was looking good, but again, he always did, especially to me.  I’ve been in love with him for a while, always from afar, and he had no idea.  Maybe today would be the day I’d get up enough gumption to actually tell him.

This was a closed practice, but that never stopped me before.  There were plenty of ways to sneak into Paycor stadium, even when it was on lockdown, if you knew what you were doing.  And I did.

My phone buzzed in my pocket and I took my attention away from practice to check.

BFF: Where are you? I’m at your place

Me: Oh, I’m out running errands, sorry.

BFF: Tell the truth, you’re at practice ogling J again aren’t you?

Me: Maybe.. Maybe not.. I can neither confirm nor deny that accusation

BFF: Well then, I’ll join you, I need to see me some Sam.

Me: It’s almost over and it’s a closed practice today, so you won’t be able to get in.

BFF: Closed practice?

BFF: They don’t let anyone into closed practices, how did.. You know what, I dno’t want to know.  Let me know when you’re home. Unless you and J are doing something after practice

Me: Will do. Love you xx

BFF: Love you too xx

As you slipped your phone back into your pocket you realised that practice was over for the day.  You slunk back into the shadows as a couple of the players and officials looked up towards where you had been sitting.  Regardless of anything else, you shouldn’t have been there and you didn’t really want to get caught and banned.

Making your way back to your car you see a line of fans waiting for the players to come out of training.  You chuckle to yourself that they clearly don’t know the tricks that you did.

For a moment you contemplate joining them, you have something you want to give to Joe, but decide maybe next time would be a better option and you jump into the car and head home.

Later that day.. Back at Paycor Stadium - Joe’s pov

I have a stalker.  There’s no getting around it any more.

I’m sitting in Coach’s office with the cops and Zac, admitting for the first time that somebody is stalking me.  I knew it all along really, but just didn’t want to admit the ’s’ word to myself.  I figured it was just an overzealous fan and that it would be ok.

Things were left on my car at training, when I was at the gym, even when I was at the grocery store but today, I couldn’t ignore it any longer.

After practice I signed some autographs and took some pictures with the fans who’d j for me.  I love my fans and I love interacting with them - for the most part.  Every fan group has those ones who are a bit.. umm, crazier than others.  Fans that would do anything to get closer to their idols.  Not that I consider myself an idol, but I know with my position and public persona, that I’m as much a likely target for the crazies as anyone else.

“So, Joe” the Detective said “Tell us exactly what happened today to make you finally call us”

“Well, I left training and headed to the grocery store.  While I was there, I took a couple of pictures with some fans, nothing major.  When I came out to my car, there were flowers on the hood and something under the windscreen wipers.”

“And this is what was under the wipers?” The Detective asked, holding up the piece of paper that had been on my window.

I nodded, and continued.  “I didn’t really think a lot of it, I just grabbed the flowers and the note and tossed them into the front seat.  Once I got home though, I wasn’t quite so sure this was an innocent interaction.”

“And why do you say that?  Joe, if we are going to find this and make sure nothing happens, we need every piece of information you have.”

“Of course detective.  Well, I got home and parked in my garage and as I got out of the car, something just felt off.  The door between the garage and the house was open but I swear I closed it before I left.  I kinda shrugged it off at first, thinking maybe my Mum had been around, or the cleaner had come even though they weren’t due for a couple of days.”

“But that wasn’t the case?”

“Well, no, once I got inside I realised some things had been moved around and then I saw the note on my kitchen bench.”

“And this is the note you found inside your house?”

I couldn’t bring myself to look at it or read it again so I just nodded and looked down at my hands in my lap.

“Joe, we need to get ahead of this” Coach said. “Detective, do you think we should do a press conference and alert the public to keep an eye out?  I’m sure this person has been around training/practice and the stadium, probably coming to game days when we play here.”

“Let’s just wait it out for now, we don’t want to scare the stalker off and not be able to find them, or worse, have them escalate their behaviour into something dangerous.”

I feel like all I can do is nod, once again.  I just never pictured myself in this situation.

There was a knock on Zac’s office door and one of the admin staff came in with a folder and handed it to Zac, whispering something to him.  I saw his eyes go wide and then he looked down at the folder.

“Ummm, detective, we may have some more information that could shed some light on this case.  We video every practice/training session and these are some stills from today’s practice that might be very interesting.”

Zac hands the folder to the detective as I sit up a bit straighter in my chair, curious about what they could have found from today’s video, given it was a closed practice, meaning nobody was able to come in and watch.

The detective opened the folder and examined the pictures closely and then handed them to me.

“What am I looking at?” I asked.

“Apparently someone was in the bleachers today during practice.  Detective, this was a closed practice today which means that this person has snuck in and possibly could be the person you are looking for.”

I peered closer at the photos.  They were grainy, a bit blurry, you couldn’t really see who it was.  It did look like a female but who could really tell.  I’m sure the police had ways of making the image a bit sharper and maybe getting some identifying details.

The police thanked Zac and I and made their way out with suggestions to beef up my security at home and at the stadium and to also be very aware of my surroundings at all times.  They didn’t think, if this person who snuck into practice today was my stalker that they posed too much danger, but you never know.

I sat for a bit longer with Zac, talking out what was happening because the only other people I could talk to at the moment were my family and my teammates and I didn’t really want to worry either group until we knew more.

On the way home, I rang my security company who agreed to schedule more regular patrols around and near my place and also to ramp up the security footage around the outside of my home.

I hated that I have to do this but I guess my safety should be number one to me and I know my Mum would kill me if she knew about this and I didn’t take these extra precautions.  It all just felt so limiting.

1 week later - Reader’s pov

I haven’t been back to Paycor.  Almost getting caught in the stadium made me back off a little bit, I didn’t want to get into trouble and be banned from practice or games in general.

I’d been following Joe and the Bengals activity on social media but it just felt so impersonal, that I was itching to get back to practice.  Actually Joe didn’t seem very active on socials the past week and most of the Bengals feed had focused on Tee, Sam and a few of the other players.  All great players but Joe was their franchise player, the top QB in the league and they should be showcasing him whenever they can.

It made me wonder what had happened in the last week.  

After I left training I headed to the grocery store to get some supplies, as my best friend was coming over after work that night for a movie night.  As I was leaving I saw Joe entering the store.  I knew he shopped here but I had never actually run into him and I just smiled at him as I walked out of the store to my car.

He has a very distinctive car and it was parked next to mine so I took a moment to admire it before I loaded my bags into the back seat and headed home again.

Later that night when my friend arrived she had some very interesting news.

“Girl, Joe Burrow has a stalker!”

“What?  I mean, how do you know this?”

“I heard some of the detectives at work today talking about it.  Apparently someone left some things on his car at the grocery store this afternoon and after he got home, someone had broken into his house and left him some kind of note - I don’t know what it said but they are beefing up security at his house.  This is huge.”

“Why haven’t they said anything about it though?”

“Well, they probably don’t want the person escalating to even more dangerous behaviour, although they may be too late for that if whoever it is has already been inside his actual house.”

That conversation has stayed with me, to be honest.  I couldn’t imagine how scared Joe must have been to go to the police about it all.

Today I was heading back to practice.  This one was open but I thought I’d stay in the background anyway, amongst the other fans and not up front like I usually try to be.  Fate, as it seemed, had other plans.

As practice was finishing, a surge in the people there pushed me towards the side of the crowd, closer to where the players exited the field.  As Joe walked past he looked at me and smiled and did a double take.  Did he recognise me?  Is he curious of who I am?

I decided to make a quiet retreat and wait outside for him and hopefully get the balls to talk to him, or give him the gift I had for him.

A few of the players dribbled out of the stadium towards their cars, all stopping to sign autographs and take pictures with the fans.  

Joe’s pov

I walked out of the stadium towards my car and it always fascinates me how many people stay after practice to talk to, take photos with and get autographs from the players.  I still struggle to understand that some of them are here exclusively to see me.  

Given recent events however, it makes me more cautious as well, and I hate that because I love giving back to my fans.

As I went along the line of fans, I saw one at the back who looked kind of familiar.  I waved her over and said “Do I know you, you look very familiar?”

“Oh, umm, you don’t know me” she said quite shyly. “We bumped into each other at the grocery store last week.”

“Oh yeah, well it’s nice to meet you, did you want a picture?”

“Uh, sure” she replied and got her phone out.

We took a couple of selfies and then she quietly said “I have something for you” and as she reached into her bag I got really nervous.  Maybe this was my stalker.  Now that I think of it, she’s at training a lot, and yes I did see her at my grocery store just before that stuff was on my car.

I nervously looked around for security and mumbled some excuse about forgetting something and sprinted back into the stadium and straight to Zac’s office.

Reader’s pov

I can’t believe it, I finally got the time, opportunity and guts to talk to Joe and he ran off.  I started to put the drawing I’d done of him back in my backpack when I looked up and saw security coming towards me.

I quickly walked towards my car and managed to get in and drive away before they got to me.  I hope they didn’t catch my licence plate and haul me in for questioning.  Just my luck I’d get in trouble because of an innocent meeting at the grocery store.

Maybe this was my sign to just find a new hobby?

Another week later - Joe’s pov

Once again, I’m sitting in Coach’s office with the detectives who this time have some good news.

“We’ve made an arrest” the detective told us.

I breathed a sigh of relief that this was over “That was quick, how did you get a break so fast?”

“Well, it all came down to the fans.  Those at practice helped us out with some info, and your observations also  gave us some insight.  We tracked the person down and an arrest was made this morning.  We have some pretty tight proof, so you may not even have to testify, but if you do, we can probably put them away for a few years.  At the least, you can get a restraining order that prevents them from coming near your house, or the stadium, or generally within about 500metres of wherever you are.”

“Thanks detective, I'm so relieved” I said.  “Did they happen to say why they did it?”

“Just a big fan, a bit lonely and wanted to be closer to you but just went about it the wrong way.  Kinda feel sorry for them, but you know, we can’t let emotion into it, otherwise we’d never catch anyone.”

“Well, thanks again detective” Zac said “We are more than grateful for your speedy resolution to this issue.”

1 year later - Reader’s pov

I walked into the lounge room and smiled, I couldn’t believe I was here.  The misunderstanding from 12 months ago led to a beautiful friendship between me and Joe.  I got over all my nerves with him and we were now able to laugh and joke about the situation.

The police did clock my licence plate that day at training, and they did come to my house and question me about the stalking.  I didn’t hold anything against Joe for thinking it could be me, I was awkward and nervous and shy whenever he was around and he obviously just didn’t see my vulnerability.

But at the next training session, he saw me again and came to talk to me.  He asked me if he and I could have a conversation over coffee, so we went and he told me they’d arrested his stalker and he apologised profusely for thinking it could be me.

He said that when I’d told him I had something for him and reached into my bag, he freaked out and just left.

I laughed and told him that I’d drawn him a picture and I’d love for him to have it if he wanted it.

We chatted for a while longer and then went separate ways.  We’d swapped numbers so that I could arrange to give him the picture and we ended up texting back and forth most days.

I’m not sure if anything will come of this but a good friendship but you never know…

[greengirllover]

Ok I want a mental illness lore, trauma lore if ur comfortable with and a whole chart of your exes.

BUCKLE UP EVERYONE

ok so i was diagnosed with insomnia, OCD and anxiety pretty young, at the age of 11 i would wake up at 3 am every morning and watch the news and have a few cups of coffee while shaking about hearing about violent crimes and laws being passed on the news, almost nothing i said when i was younger made any sense, i would talk in riddles i would say things like “the grass was gray and the streetlights were bright but it was dark and the wind” so then they started testing me for a bunch of stuff and the results were always inconclusive, i was then diagnosed later with depression and anorexia, i started drinking and smoking at 12 and i’ve been at it since

now for my ex’s 🤗

i’ve only actually dated two people bc i’m not a fan of relationships, i talked to this one guy in middle school, he came over and i wouldn’t fuck him so he ran outside in the middle of winter and walked around my neighborhood until he could get picked up, i talked to this other guy in freshman year and he tried to get me drunk so i would send him nudes and he called me mommy all the time and i’d just stand there like 🧍🏻‍♀️, after this most of the people i dated were drug dealers, the one who used to wake me up when i would pass out was a dealer, he would bring me to random peoples apartments, places under bridges and his dealers, he brought me to see someone’s kittens once but the people pulled out a katana on us and then their landlord chased us all out of the house, then his friend tried to fuck me, asked me to do his drug test for him so he didn’t go to jail but they randomly tested him and he got sent away, this one i almost forgot about bc he wasn’t a boyfriend he was a stalker, he would give me comics and stick love letters in them going in detail specifically about my eyes and hair, he said he wanted to peel my flesh off and eat it and he had a hair kink and would ask girls to send him videos of them shampooing their hair, also he brought a knife to school after he said he wanted to eat my flesh, then there is my ex girlfriend i actually dated her and she used to put me down constantly and used to bite me so hard that i’d scream in pain and beg her to stop and i would have bruises all over me but i’m not gonna lie she was really hot but crazy in an abusive way so ew, then we have the only man i’ve ever come close to loving, i met him freshman year, we had mutual friends, we were so close that if someone was trying to find me they would go to him and vise versa, he had the most beautiful smile i’ve ever seen and he was probably the funniest person i’ve ever met, we used to go on walks together all the time and i would normally end up almost passing out because i wasn’t eating at the time, he used to buy me apple juice and sit with me while i waited until i was okay enough to keep walking, but i was very sick then so i didn’t treat him very well (emotionally) i also thought i was a lesbian and i was scared that if we started dating and then i found out that i was a lesbian i would really hurt him and i was also terrified of any man touching me and he knew that, i ended things with him and it really fucked him up since we had been friends for so long and i was dismissive of his feelings for me, i found out later that he would talk about me all the time and he told his friends that he was happy just being near me and that he would be okay never even touching me, so then when i started eating again and was thinking more clearly i realized that he was everything to me but he said he would only date girls that were the opposite of me so he could never be hurt like that again and now he has a girlfriend who screams at him all the time and i still miss him that’s about it i have a few more but they were relatively uneventful

now my trauma lore 🙌🏻🙌🏻

so i’ll just go over a few things, there’s a long line of sexual abuse in my family and because of that most of the people in my family are practically dead because they are so disassociated from reality, i was assaulted by this one guy in his car and got blamed for it and was made to apologize to the people who forced me into that situation for “blaming them” and after i was assaulted the people i was with wouldn’t take me home and they instead brought me to another guys house and left me alone in his basement with him at midnight, it was my first time meeting him and he put his hands on me too, i got stalked a few times, once by a guy from school the guy i mentioned before and another time by this car of guys that would follow me every time i would go on a walk because they memorized my schedule, also my dad used to cry while holding me while i slept and thought i never knew, also i was left alone a lot all my life so most of my life was spent having to eat cold food (i didn’t know how to cook) and having to take care of my sister who is the same age as me

ok that’s about it if u read this whole thing i love you

[takitafulily]

Misadventures of the MCs #10

Working the Night Shift: Night 1 - 5

Disclaimer: No Mcs were harmed during their night shift :>

(In honour of the FNAF movie release)

(1st Night)

LTD!MC: Woo! I got the easy night! Probably a good thing too-

LTD!MC: I can chill until 2am and then just keep an eye out for Bonnie, Chica moves at 3... oh shit what does Foxy do again?-

LTD!MC: ...Guess I gotta keep an eye on Pirate's Cove

(2am)

LTD!MC: *checks camera* Aaaand Bonnie just left the stage, let's just pray he's not right outside my door...

LTD!MC: Ok good, he's in the dining area, I'm fine... let's keep it that way...

(3am)

LTD!MC: Haven't died yet, Chica just left, time to multi-task...

(4am)

*Both Bonnie and Chica are at the door*

LTD!MC: Nonononono goawaygoawaygoaway come on please be nice...

(5am)

LTD!MC: Phew, ok I'm alive, one more hour to go, Foxy's behaving, Bonnie and Chica please be nice...

Golden Freddy: *appears*

LTD!MC: WHO THE FUCK ARE YOU?????

LTD!MC - Failed

(2nd Night)

MM!MC: ...I feel like I should be offended they gave me the second night but honestly maybe they're right-

MM!MC: Let's see... Golden Freddy already got LTD!MC, so it's unlikely he's going to come after me... Bonnie and Chica... keep checking Pirate's Cove and... I'm all set!

MM!MC: *checking cameras* Ok Chica's gone... where is she... wait FUCK BONNIE'S GONE TOO OK SHIT

MM!MC: Chica's chilling in the kitchen judging by the jiggle... and Bonnie's down the hall...

(1am)

*Bonnie's by the closed left door*

MM!MC: HA TAKE THAT-

*Sees Chica by the right door at the last second*

MM!MC: OH DARN IT YOU PIZZA CHICKEN!

MM!MC - Failed

(3rd Night)

WHB!MC: I had to actually fight OB!MC for the third night. Everyone left the first night for LTD!MC cus no offence they're kind of a wimp. MM!MC got the second night cus they can't throw a kick to save their life. No way am I taking the fifth night cus that's just asking to die, and why would I make my life harder by taking the fourth night?

WHB!MC: As long as I keep flicking to Freddy and check on Foxy every hour, I'll be fine.

WHB!MC: ...Chica is gone. Let's get this show on the road. Freddy, lights, Freddy, lights, Freddy, lights, Freddy, lights...

(1am)

WHB!MC: Hourly Foxy... nothing, fucked up my rhythm but Freddy is only in the Dining Hall so I'm still fine, Chica's is being a cute little stalker and won't leave my fucking door but my power should be fine.

(2am)

WHB!MC: Bonnie's gone, hourly Foxy... still nothing, Freddy, lights, Freddy, lights, Freddy, lights, Freddy, lights- oh hello Chica! *shuts right door*

(4am)

WHB!MC: I'm alive I'm alive I'm alive~ wait- where did Foxy go?

WHB!MC: ...shit shit shit shit shit shit

*goes to shut the left door but Foxy manages to barge in*

WHB!MC: Well hello there-

WHB!MC - Failed

(4th Night)

OB!MC: Everyone's failed so far, I don't have high hopes myself but let's give a go I guess.

OB!MC: RIP Phone Guy, may you rest in pieces.

OB!MC: Huh? Oh I'm the only one who's bothered to listen to him, poor guy.

OB!MC: Hm, you know what? Since I'm gonna die anyways let's have some fun.

OB!MC: I'm not gonna check the cameras, I'm just going relax and listen

(1am)

OB!MC: I've come to realise these- *shuts door on Foxy* metal punks are extremely- *shuts door on Freddy* ...fucking loud.

(3am)

OB!MC: Huh. I'm still kicking ass. Pat on the back for me I guess.

(4am)

*Foxy is banging the left door and Chica is outside the right door*

OB!MC: I'm getting kinda bored actually, what can I do to kill time...

(5am)

*both doors are open, absolute silence*

OB!MC: Ah~ Ah~ Ah~ Ah~ stayin' alive~ stayin' aLIVE-

*shuts door on Bonnie*

OB!MC: ... that was close.

OB!MC - Survived!

(5th Night)

TWST!Yuu: The others think I'm gonna die since I have the hardest night. Fuck them, we ball.

TWST!Yuu: Woo ok! LET'S GO! HOURLY FOXY, FREDDY, LIGHTS, FREDDY, LIGHTS, FREDDY, LIGHTS, FREDDY, LIGHTS-

(1am)

TWST!Yuu: FREDDY, LIGHTS, FREDDY, LIGHTS, FREDDY, LIGHTS, FREDDY, LIGHTS- FUCK YOU BONNIE *shuts door*

(2am)

TWST!Yuu: FREDDY, LIGHTS, FREDDY, LIGHTS- ok my throat's getting sore let's stop yelling for now

(4am)

TWST!Yuu: Two more hours! ...aaaaand why am I on 20% ...I haven't even used that much power!

(5am)

TWST!Yuu: Shit, 1%... *anxious leg bounce*

TWST!Yuu: Oop- Hello Bonnie... and Chica... pleaseletmemakeitpleaseletmemakeit

*6am Jingle*

TWST!Yuu: FUCK YES LESSGOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

TWST!Yuu - Survived!

[grimoire-of-geekery]

What is your advice for someone who can read tarot relatively okay for other people but is trash when it comes to reading for themself? (Cards dont make sense and literally every card is reversed despite careful shuffling to get a healthy mix of both upright and reversed cards)

*hugs* I know that frustration all too well.

Ok, so here are some things I say to everyone where tarot reading is concerned:

It's not just what the cards say, it's what they don't say. A tarot deck works by representing the whole world and all of the various turns and twists of fate people can experience. When Death shows up, but not the Ten of Swords, that's because you're dealing with Death, but not in the form of an ending. Likewise, if the Three of Coins appears and not the Eight, then your experience will reflect financial growth and demonstration of your mastery, rather than the learning of that skillset.

For this reason, I encourage diviners to adopt a different method for reading inversions than "the bad version of this card" or "the opposite." For the latter, there's already a card in the deck for any "opposite" meaning you could come up with. For the former... every card can be bad or good in the right circumstance. For myself, I use a method where the inverted cards are signs that the querent will have difficulty understanding that card, and I should take pains to carefully explain that one, pointing out nuances that might be missed. Generally it means the card is "shadowed," or their own beliefs and views obstruct the truth. Another really good one I read recently is the idea of an upright card being "invoked" and an inverted card being "banished," which is a very interesting perspective. I like the idea of "this card is departing from you, or taking its blessing/curse/experience away."

Those two things I say to everyone, just to clear space. The first really specific piece of advice I'd give to you if you're having trouble reading for yourself is do not add cards. Read what's already there. Take a picture of it, note everything in a journal, and look at it periodically. Focus not on what your feeling is, but what the card means. Do research, look it up in books, especially your own writings on the card if you have them. Seriously, adding too many cards makes the reading even harder to read. "Clarification" cards are a joke.

In addition, check your spread. The spreads we use are how we talk to the world and ask for information. Make sure that when you lay those cards in that pattern, you actually want the information the spread can offer. If you're looking for advice, don't ask a spread that's solely about prediction, that sort of thing.

I'd also suggest you take a look at the deck and see if it really expresses how you experience the world, and then I'd do divination that has nothing to do with your wishes for a while, to see if it can accurately relate the world to you. I wanna be specific here- what I'm talking about here is not how you wish the world was, but rather how you experience the world as it is. The deck is meant to reflect the world as it is, and reveal its secrets to you, and if the deck isn't doing that for you in your readings, you may need to use a different deck, or maybe even a different divination method at all.

If all your cards are coming up inverted all the time, that's a sign. The deck is specifically speaking to you and saying something to you. If it were my own deck, that would be a message that "you ain't gonna get it, so you may as well stop asking." I can't say what that omen means for you, but I would consider it a big one, maybe a step or two above "stalker" cards, and just below the significance of a reading that's more than 80% one suit. If that's the case, I'd ask your cards what they're trying to tell you that you're not getting, and record the answers. For myself, I use three-card combinations for those kinds of specific questions.

If you wanna reach out and talk to me more in depth, I'm definitely available if you wanna come off anon and have a conversation, or you can just send a few more anon asks if that's your comfort level. I hope I helped, one way or another. *hugs*

[macsimagines]

Who are the most dangerous TR yanderes vs the least dangerous? Would love to see your rankings.❤️

-🐇 anon

ASK BOX IS OPEN

Most Dangerous

Kisaki Tetta -He will ruin your life and those around you if you try to fight him. Total mind fuck what this guy does to make you his. He also isn't above killing you because if he can't have you no one else will.

Taiju Shiba -I feel like this guy is gonna be very violent, and it's always gonna be your fault. He'll force you to marry him, have his kids and then beat the shit out of you and the kids the second the urge pops up. He might actually kill you one day.

Mikey Sano -The lengths he goes for you is insane. He's killed and tortured for your sake and never even flinched while doing it. There is no choice and he does not accept no. You belong to him. Every strand of hair on your head to the toes on your feet belong to Mikey. And he will kill you just because even your Death belongs to him

Least Dangerous

Hakkai Shiba -Ok so, hear me out... He's just a stalker. Silent starrer in the night. He likes to watch. Sure he beats the shit out of anyone that threatens you but honestly the worst you can expect is being met with his eyes on you 24/7. He likes to watch you eat, sleep bathe you're pretty much safe with this freak.

Souya Kawata/Angry -Surprised? Well don't be. Sure he's pretty violent and scary but when it comes to you he's a big puppy dog. His older brother is a bad influence but he can be pretty chill so long as you don't talk to or look at other boys. And if you do? He'll beat the shit out of them.

Inupi Seishu -With this guy you're probably fine. He's pretty possessive but he's also tough. Any threat he can take care of so he's not at all insecure about rivals. He just needs you to respond to any messages he sends you within 45seconds or he'll die. Other than that you're fiiiine.

[pianocat939]

Something just came to me. In your yandere ASMR turtles blurb, the main reason (from what I can see) that the turtles went yandere is from m/c’s comments, which would imply that the turtles stalk every one of their avid followers, or at least have stalked them at some point.

Now, I highly doubt any of them would actually do that (even as a yandere, I don’t see the reason they would stalk every single fan of theirs), also someone would probably complain if they were being stalked by a giant turtle (someone would notice), so why would they go out of their way to stalk m/c… unless…

They were already stalking m/c in the first place…

Think about it. The turtles were already aware of m/c’s existence, and their comments on their channels only fueled their desires. Maybe they even made the channel specifically for m/c, knowing they like ASMR, and slowly learning more about their likings and changing to be more like that.

Donnie could even make the channel private so only m/c can view it, and use AI’s to like and comment on the video to make it seem legit. Imagine if all the turtles were in on it… m/c would be screwed.

Imagine poor m/c, who is just trying to sleep, and suddenly they get ASMR’d in bed by a creepy stalker who runs the channel they like. When m/c finally passes out (let’s be real here, we would all fall asleep real quickly to their hushed voices, scary situation or not), they kidnap them to the lair and basically put m/c in ASMR hell haven!

Wait! Wouldn’t this also imply that this AU is a mix between an isekai au as well, because the ASMR is then roleplaying as themselves?! Imagine cracking the multiverse only to create an ASMR channel to attract someone you haven’t even physically met from another universe-

Sorry I didn’t answer right away- been recovering and busy busy busy

Ok so I’m basically writing 2 separate blurbs- one for the “stalked you before” and “isekai” one.

Tw: mostly creepy stalkerish knowledge, and kidnapping- oh and obsession

(This is going to steer towards a romantic point- so be mindful of that)

Ok so in terms of stalked you before, I would definitely see this with Donnie and Leo. Donnie would do it because he would have the easiest time doing it without getting caught. Like you said, he could use AI to make fake comments or just flat out manage to upload 2 different versions of the same video except you can only view the one enabled to you. Which is the creepier one, where he uses your name and some other things. “Y/n, I know this is your favourite music genre, so won’t you dance with me to it?”

With Leo, he’ll definitely do it since he KNOWS he can use the purr tone somehow. Yes he is in denial if you don’t like it- he will MAKE you like it. Unlike Donnie who uploads separate videos, Leo manages to input things about your day to talk about in his videos but never explicitly says it’s meant to the directed to you. And let me tell you something, he probably gets popular with his ASMR ngl- either way, he will make his videos creepily similar to your day, like, “Oh, you got a 67% on your test~? Poor baby~” and you exactly got a 67% on your test or something.

Ok, moving on:

So with the isekai thing, I find it genius. But again, I believe only Donnie would be able to upload a video to an alternate universe’s website- unless by the fact they use the same YouTube as we do. (Just for this case let's actually say they upload on youtube)

Imagine how giddy they are, finally being able to more or less one-sidedly converse with the person they're so obsessed with! Finally, they can show their love and admiration!

They watch their comments if they ever do comment, and try to change up themselves in the asmr once in a while. since no one actually knows it's them. And the more they learn about their likes, the more they just want to feel them in person! (yes even Donnie wants just the slightest touch)

So as expected, once MC just snoozing to their asmr, they crawl onto their bed, give them a silly whisper of whatever they want to say, and next thing you know, MC wakes up in the turtles' lair, getting asmr'ed by 4 turtles who look way to fucking real and similar to the show.

"Hey, mi vida~ how was your sleep~? Did my fantastic voice lull you to sleep~? As expected~?"

"You aren't taking care of yourself properly...And I'm going to change that, whether you like it or not. No more accidentally dehydrating yourself."

"Ohmigosh...! My divinity is finally here...! In front of me...! Their loyal devotee...~!"

"Yes, yes, yes! Cuddles! Lots of cuddles and kisses! No more being lonely!"

[butterrats]

ATTENTION 2012 TMNT FANBASE I HAVE A PSA

I love 2012 Donnie

I severely dislike 2012 April, one could say I hate her.

I am allowed to have my own opinions on these not-real-people characters because it. Is. A. Cartoon.

No, I am not a misogynist because I hate 2012 April. I actually love literally all five female characters they put in the show except her (Wow writers...) I'm a fucking feminist lesbian. Disliking a female character does not make you a misogynist. I honestly think a lot of her slander is undeserved, but I'd be a goddamn liar if I didn't say I kinda (ok I love it) enjoy participating in it. HOWEVER, I do not think she is a bad person. Is she snippy, rude, entitled, and kinda a brat in my eyes? Yeah, no dip. Do I think she's evil and intentionally trying to seduce every guy she sees into being her man slave? Uh no. I think she's annoying and I dislike her, but I don't want her to burn in hell. I want what I want for every character I see on a show: *clears throat* OWNING UP TO THEIR SHIT AND CHANGING FOR THE BETTER AND NOT BEING A MARY SUE AND MANY OTHER THINGS I DON'T FEEL LIKE GETTING INTO AT 11:30 PM. This goes for literally all the characters on the show. I wanna see Donnie and Casey apologize to April for being weird with her, AND I want April to apologize to them for being weird with them. THEY ALL DESERVED BETTER. They all could have developed amazingly if the writers didn't stick their heads up their asses and spew whatever shit they inhaled onto the script. I have so many other examples of this: I want Splinter to realize the generational trauma he's inflicting on his sons, Karai developing her relationships with all her brothers, Casey going into his backstory, insert other example.

No, I am not encouraging "nice guy" behavior by loving on Donnie. Oh wow, a kid with zero social interaction outside of his three brothers an strict dad gets weirdly obsessed with the first person he develops romantic feelings for? Who could've seen that coming? He should have left her alone when she wanted to be left alone and given her space, yes, but goddamn people, these characters are children. They're always making dumb choices. It's TEENAGE mutant ninja turtles. My boy never once tried to force himself on this girl. Never tried turning her no into a yes. Never wanted her to do anything she wasn't okay with. He's not a "nice guy" or an "incel" or a "stalker" he's a smart boy who made some very dumb choices. So did literally every other character in the goddamn show. You wanna talk creepy? Leo knowingly had the hots for his motherfudging sister but that's a whole 'nother can of worms I ain't touching tonight baby. I just personally think Donnie has so many more redeeming qualities to his character. Honestly, in my opinion, his apology to April was good enough for me. Not perfect by any means, but good enough. Donnie is literally one of the only characters who quickly owns up when he messes up, I think that' worth something considering the characters. Honestly, Donnie is a sweetheart, super smart, sassy, and fun to watch, and I think his qualities outweigh his flaws, unlike how I feel about April. (How I feel about her.)

My morality should not be called into question when I have an opinion on a fictional character for fuck's sake. This franchise is beloved, BELOVE IT. Have your opinions, love April, hate April, love Donnie, hate Donnie, just enjoy yourselves (except you, Tcesters, stay the fuck away from me and my son.) These characters aren't perfect, they're flawed, they're young, they're children. It's not their fault they were written like shit. They're ALL good people at the end of the day.

I hate 2012 April's guts and I love 2012 Donnie to death. But that doesn't mean you have to as well. LOVE YOUR CHARACTERS.

Holy jumping Jesus on a hoagie sandwich why did I waste an hour of my life writing this? I need to get to bed, I have work tomorrow. Anyways, hope this gets to someone who needs it, love yourself, love characters, don't fucking ship siblings, eat your homework, and enjoy your life. Love you <3

[alovesongshewrote]

Too Weird to Die | The Lost Boys x Reader HCs

Plot:  a monster hunter half adopts the Frog brothers and then avoids being murdered by vampires by being too weird to die. more at 8. [The Lost Boys x GN!Reader]

Word count:  2,873

Warnings:  murder, comedic violence, so much swearing that i'm putting it in the warnings

A/N: holy fuck i can't believe i wrote this lmaoooo. i might re-visit the concept, but for now, this is good

So all this shit starts a few years before the Emersons move to Santa Carla

You stop by the town on a visit because 

Y’know 

It’s a murder capital, who doesn’t stop at murder capitals for tourist reasons?

In all seriousness, you’re there because of all the suspicious murders

As a full time professional monster hunter, you know something is up, and you want to see if you can do anything about it

And you both can and can’t

At the time, you don’t find much evidence of actual monster activity 

Either because the titular lost boys are taking a break from murder for the month, or because they Know Something’s Up and they want to be Careful

BUT

YOU DO FIND SOMETHING

And that something is two dipshit (affectionate) amateur vampire hunters who are just raring to get themselves murdered horribly 

They followed you into an alley and threatened to stake you

It sounds bad, but keep in mind, they were like

Eleven

At the time

They were little

And they were so full of rage that you literally laughed at them for five minutes

AND YOU FELT BAD, BUT ALSO

IT WAS LIKE BEING HELD AT GUNPOINT BY PUPPIES 

You just couldn’t take them seriously 

However, the world you live in is a dangerous one, and those two dumbass kids were lucky that they threatened you, and not someone or something that wouldn’t have any objections to beating up literal children

So what you do is you take those little shits

And you train them up a little bit

Not enough to be actively dangerous

But enough so that they don’t get murdered

And that’s how you become the adopted older sibling to the Frog brothers

You didn’t have a choice in that, they hit you with the metaphorical adoption papers and you couldn’t do anything but go, “ok”

But you don’t mind too much

They’re you’re little bros

They’re so irritating, and if anything happened to them you’d kill everyone in santa carla and then yourself

Anyway

You leave santa carla for a bit, because, y’know, the murders stopped as soon as you got there

You’re away for a few months

And then bada bing bada boom, shit starts up again and you make your return

This time, you find the source of the problem, but you don’t realize they’re vampires for like, a solid minute

For the first few months, you genuinely think david and his gang are just

Annoying 

The first time you met them, david monologued for so long that you zoned out and started focusing on their jackets

You came to the conclusion that they all had dope jackets

And then you got bored and tried to leave

Which david wasn’t crazy about

So he told the boys to grab you and, well

Long story short, Marko got punched in the face

Rip marko

After that, the boys decided they were going to eat you

Because you don’t mess with them and get away with it!

So, they follow you around santa carla for A While

And at first it’s scary, because y’know

You’re being followed

But after some time you figure they aren’t actually going to do anything

So you’re more irritated than afraid

Aaaand they don’t try anything in all of that time because for one thing, they can never seem to find you when you’re on your own

And for another, every time they approach you as a group you let out a Very Loud Groan that informs everyone nearby of your location

So killing you would be too sus

Also, you don’t tell the frogs you’re being followed

Because they would probably try to murder your stalkers?

And like

You don’t need these fuckin kids going down on attempted murder charges, they’re too young for that shit

So

The cat and mouse game is just between you and the boys

And it’s at a stalemate 

For a While

Until they get the idea to approach you individually 

David is technically the first one to try it, though that’s more of an accident than anything else

The rest of the boys are off doing their own thing when David catches sight of you

He makes his approach 

All suave and cool 

Annnnnnd to make another long story short, he gets pushed into the ocean.

Oops.

Paul is the next one to try it

He heard about you pushing david into the ocean and he went :0

Like, that legitimately kind of sounds like a good time to him

Also, he kind of wants you dead!

But they all do, so

Anyway

He makes his approach

And you see him coming

And you just so happen to be drinking out of a glass bottle, so you chug the rest of your drink and shatter the bottom of the bottle in the minute it takes him to get to you

In retaliation, and also because breaking glass bottles is now a dick measuring contest

He picks up a bottle and tries to shatter it

It Does Not Go Well

Poor thing gets glass everywhere and like

You can’t help but laugh at him

AND AGAIN, YOU FEEL BAD

ESPECIALLY WHEN HE POUTS A LITTLE BIT, LIKE A KICKED PUPPY

AND YOU FEEL LIKE YOU KICKED A PUPPY

So you walk over and you go

“Ok, if you promise not to stab me, I’ll show you how to break a glass bottle properly.”

And like

He already knows how to break a glass bottle

He just fucked it up that time

But he lets you teach him anyway

And it’s totally to earn your trust so he can eat you

It absolutely doesn’t have anything to do with the way he really likes the sound of your laugh

Nope

Not at all

He gets back to the cave later, and he successfully spoke to you, but he didn’t successfully kill you, so everyone’s kinda pissed at him except for star and laddie

And david’s pissed that paul didn’t get thrown into the ocean, but oh well

The next boy to approach you is dwayne

And honestly, he doesn’t really approach you with intent

It just kind of happens

But when it does, he also doesn’t get thrown into the ocean

He encounters you in a bookstore on the boardwalk

And at first you don’t notice him

You’re too busy reading something that looks like a bodice ripper, but it has tentacles on the cover????

And even if he had thought of picking you up and carrying you off somewhere to kill you, he gets way too fucking distracted by that thing

Eventually you notice him standing there and you just

Throw the book

You yeet it off behind you and you go

“OH, HI, HELLO, HOW ARE YOU?  IT’S DWAYNE, RIGHT?  NICE JACKET, YOU AREN’T WEARING A SHIRT, OKAY, BYE.”

And then you go to fucking run out of the store

Because jesus christ, your one night without the frogs for you to partake in your Adult Life and one of the fucking BIKE BOYS shows up 

FUCK

Anyway, dwayne manages to grab you before you can leave

And he doesn’t get punched unlike poor marko

No, you’re too embarrassed for that

And it only gets worse for you when dwayne starts asking questions

You answer

Because you have no idea what else you can do

And this motherfucker seems to be getting a kick out of your discomfort 

He’s got this SMIRK on his face

Like he likes watching you squirm

Like he thinks it’s cute (he does)

You hate it

You like it

After what feels like an eternity of questioning, he does take pity on you

He buys you a drink and, instead of murdering you, he answers your questions

And you get close to figuring out that he’s a vampire 

But not quite :/

Oh well

Dwayne goes back to the cave, and everyone is like, “jfc, why is this little shit so unkillable?”

No one has answers, but dwayne does have a weird lump in his jacket pocket, and when he checks to see what it is, he sees the very tip of a tentacle before he SHOVES THAT THING BACK WHERE IT CAME FROM WITH 0 MERCY

He has no fucking clue how you got that book onto his person without him noticing

But he respects it

Anyway, they send marko after you next

Because you punched him, and he hates you

Don’t worry about it too much though, because his opinion changes in like

Ten minutes

He follows you into like

A thrift store 

And once you realize you’re being followed you go, “oh hey, it’s you, with the cool jacket, sorry i punched you that one time, but to be fair, you did grab me, so”

And then you hand him a little bag of cool buttons that you found on a shelf 

And you say, with a very sweet and genuine smile

“These match your jacket!”

And all he can think is,

“Oh, so that’s why you’re still alive, okay”

Needless to say, he returns home having not murdered you, and david is Unamused 

You wounded his pride and punched his friend, he Does Not Like you

And then one night you run into him outside of the video store

And he already looks grumpy 

But then he sees you, and it just gets worse

Ironically

He tells you to buzz off that time

Which you don’t fucking do, because this bitch and his friends stalked you for A Time

And even though you’ve made friends with most of your stalkers, you’re still not gonna let this one go

And that’s like

Literally what you tell him

It makes him roll his eyes and fantasize about pushing you into the ocean

But then you go quiet 

And for a few minutes, the two of you just

Stand outside of the video store, leaning against the wall together

In the middle of the noise and excitement of the boardwalk, the two of you are calm and quiet 

And then you go

“Hey, do you ever realize that you have free will, and if you wanted to, you could just throw eggs at your fridge?”

And he goes

“Why the fuck would anyone want to do that”

To which you respond

“To test out their free will.”

You bounce off the wall and hold a hand out to him

“Come on.”

He asks where you’re going and you just 

Look at him

With the most devilish smile that vampire has ever seen

And you go

“To get some eggs.”

And while you’re doing that, you learn that david is so grumpy because his father (he does air quotes when he says the word father) is being very very unreasonable and also possibly indulging in mild child endangerment 

And like

David isn’t a kid, but it’s still endangering family

And that pisses you off

So as you’re leaving the boardwalk’s convenience store

You basically say

“Do you want me to kill that guy for you?  Because it sounds like he sucks, and I’ll totally kill that guy for you”

And to his own surprise, David finds himself saying no

Because if you tried to murder max, you would die- or at least he thinks you would

And oddly enough, he doesn’t want that for you

And he, too, realizes why no one’s killed you yet

And then you just cement it by grabbing the eggs and going, “Come on, let’s test our free will”

Is it immature to throw eggs at the video store?

Absolutely

But fuck it, you have free will

Or maybe you’ve just been hanging around the frogs too much

SPEAKING OF WHICH 

IT MIGHT BE IMPORTANT TO MENTION

THAT THIS WHOLE TIME

You’ve been going back to the frog brothers’ comic book store every night

Just to check on them, make sure they aren’t dead

Bc, y’know, santa carla, murder capital

And every time you come into the store after an encounter with one of the Boys, you have this weird smile on your face

Of course, they think it might be vampires.

And after you come back from the video store, they bring this up with you

One of them has a stake in his hand, and they go

“You’ve been weird lately, and we think it’s vampires.  Do you want us to kill the vampires for you?  Because it sounds like they suck, and we’ll totally kill those vampires for you”

So clearly, threatening violence is how all frogs, adopted or otherwise, express their love

Anyway, you just go

“Jesus christ, you know there’s more out there than just vampires, right?  Also, no, I’m not being weird because of vampires, I’m being weird because I found charming people in santa carla of all places.  Imagine that.”

And then the next week you find out the boys are vampires

You stop by the cave, and at this point they’ve given up on eating you, but it’s just so clear, and you are

Filled With Regret

In part because Holy Shit Your Brothers Were Right

But also because you’re probably going to have to kill the boys??

And oddly enough

You Don’t Want To Kill The Boys???

They went from stalkers to sweethearts and you’re mad about it

So of course, upon figuring it out

(they don’t tell you, by the way, you figure it out thanks to the smell of death, the sharp teeth, the Single Bed for four men, a little boy, and poor fucking star, and the poorly hidden dead body in their cave)

Anyway, upon figuring it out

You take the most rational route:

You get marko in a chokehold and hold a stake to his chest

Poor marko, he always gets the short end of the stick

Anyway

The boys all lose their shit

Which is

Fair

To them it looks like you pulled of their plan- you charmed them, and now you’re going to kill them, or at least try to

But before they can, y’know, rip your head off of your shoulders

You go

“WAIT!  Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, here’s the thing.  I!  Don’t want to kill Marko!  And hey, I’ve lived this long, so I assume you don’t want to kill me.  So, let’s make a deal.  We don’t kill each other, and everyone lives.  Sound good?”

Once they agree, you let marko go

And y’know what, because i think he deserves it

He punches you

And you can’t even be mad at that, you just threatened his life

But alas, that’s not where it ends

Because you’ve got a clause to add to your little agreement 

“Wait,” you say, mildly out of breath from the punching, “You can’t kill me, and I’ve got two little brothers you can’t kill either.  Their parents run that comic book store, the one on the boardwalk?  And they’re off limits.”

The boys sigh and nod, but jesus christ do you have more to say

“They also might try to kill you?  You don’t have to worry about it or anything, they’re like, twelve.”

The boys are not twelve at this point, but that’s how old they’re going to be to you forever

You’re never going to be able to see them as anything other than actual babies because that’s how siblings work

Anyway, you continue

“I’m working on getting them to be less murder-y, but they are very blood thirsty for their age.  I’m sure you can relate.”

Yeahhhh, no one laughs at that joke but you

But it’s okay

The agreement is made

You and the frog brothers are off limits in terms of murder

And you Don’t to tell the frogs about this because they would Attempt To Murder Your Vampires, and that’s not what you want

And in the same vein 

The boys don’t breathe a word of this to max

Because he would order them to turn you and your brothers

Or worse!

He would order them to kill you and your brothers

And they Do Not Want that

AND IN A SIMILAR YET DIFFERENT VEIN

THEY CANNOT LEAVE YOU ALONE AROUND MAX

IN FACT, I DON’T THINK THEY EVER TELL YOU THAT HE’S THEIR SIRE

You just think he’s david’s dad, and you don’t ask questions, because they don’t answer your questions, because if you knew what kind of power max had over them, and how easy it would be to abuse that power, you would try to kill max

Because murder is the love language of the frogs.

Anyway, they’re pretty sure that you would get yourself killed if you tried to fight max

And you’re 100% sure that the frogs would get themselves killed if they tried to fight the boys

That or they might actually hurt one of the boys

You did train them a bit, so they aren’t totally incompetent 

And the whole thing is just a messy web 

It’s an endless game where the only goal is to try and keep the people you care about from killing each other while the people you care about try to keep you from killing the people they hate

It’s

Complicated 

But hey, when you practice delinquency with your boys

Any of your boys

That shit’s fuckin worth it

[turtlesocksv2]

4 Minutes Ep 2 Liveblogging

ok i'm not even going to look at my dash, i am going straight into this. I have been home for all of 10 minutes but I cannot wait.

oh somebody just got their ass beat Cain and Abel style.

So her son committed suicide because of gambling debts. We know who's running an online gambling operation. I see the dots, I am starting to connect them. also LMFAO at Tyme he does NOT know how to deal with patients it looked like it was physically painful for him while she was talking and he was trying to figure out what the fuck to say/do. and in the end, he does the least. Take these pills and tomorrow there will be another, DIFFERENT doctor who is NOT ME that you can tell this to.

Even the nurses gossip about how intimidating and cold he is. Very interested in Tyme's doctor ex-girlfriend just from that throwaway. Girl, do not drop out of your specialty over a boy!!!

Heyyyy it's my other boy Mio! I hope he gets to be unhinged here as well. And lmao at Title being an Awful Boyfriend Jet is really getting typecast as The Worst Dude. Ohohoho, sneaky sneaky with the phone recording, good job Dome!!!

god this flashback/dreamsequence/thinking about his powers scene is so visually interesting. i love it.

Title, your girlfriend is missing and people are suspecting you are involved maybe don't have a dance party in your car??? waiting for your bestie to help cover it up??? he fucking is keeping her locked up until she won't break up with him anymore oh my god. Jet really DOES play The Worst Dude every time. Great, you could stand to be a little more concerned your friend is a kidnapper here, this is why the goddess of time is telling you to experience character growth and be a doper person.

AND NOW TITLE HAS DOME IN THE TRUNK OF HIS CAR POSSIBLY DYING. THIS MAN JUST CAN'T STOP.

good on Great for kicking Title's ass and taking Dome to the hospital.

Lmao at Tyme fixing his hair and tucking in his scrub top before seeing Great as a patient. the nurse calling him out about it without saying anything is Peak Comedy. this fucking loser.

Tyme, Great is in no condition to be dealing with a Hot Doctor who is Looming like that. he has a head injury! the way Tyme just gets all up in his space...I am losing my goddamn shit at the heartbeat sound effect going on while Tyme is inspecting the wound. God this conversation is excruciating in the best way Tyme is down so bad it's hilarious.

Oooooh, JJay is a cop. Oh that's going to be delicious when we get KornTonklaWin drama from it.

Oh, is Tonkla Title's brother? that's interesting. Win has much better bedside manner/victim comforting than Tyme does. Korn's brother killing Tonkla's brother...the drama.

Oh but now we're getting a confrontation between Great and Title...hallucination? was the dead body not Title? anyway, the ticking clock effect works very well here. love these little audio touches that add so much.

Tyme here to save the day! so Title is indeed alive unless Sammon's getting Real Weird With It which I would respect. Once again, it is physically painful for Tyme to express human emotions "I was just worried" ok stalker. he's such a fucking disaster.

Nepo Baby Kitty returns!!! so fluffy, so majestic, would cuddle and feed sponsored treats.

uh-oh system crash at the illegal gambling operation is probably not great!

oof, Korn, just don't answer at all. no wonder Tonkla's gonna leave your ass for the hot cop.

the cello players are really insane, actually. This mafia uncle has flair, I like it.

I've only known Fasai for 2 minutes and I love her already. Mafia Queen!

...Is Bas going to be Ass Out every episode? Because I'm not complaining, love that for him.

Poor Tonkla, waiting desperately for his Ain't Shit boyfriend/sugar daddy/whatever to call him. But wait, what's this? Hot Cop Win is at the door? Sammon always delivers the "ACAB...except for this one Hot Cop that is only half a bastard." be grateful that Tonkla isn't breaking into your car to steal evidence and do his own investigation, Win!

[tokyogruel]

22 - your favorite part of canon that everyone else ignores 👀

from this ask game!

OKAY SO... i know i KNOW yamanaka has said the cover songs have nothing to do with the character's murders... BUT IDGAF ABOUT THEIR MURDERS I CARE ABOUT THE CHARACTERS!!!

the cover songs are SO UNBELIEVABLY UNDERRATED in terms of character analysis and their personalities! the instruments used, the tones of the songs, the lyrics telling us how the character feels... i fully believe the cover songs are extracted from their hearts!! which is why some of them are SO DIFFERENT FROM THEIR MAIN SONGS!

i could go on about all of the character's cover songs.... so i will LOL

HARUKA

two breaths walking: “This is Page 1 of the process of my evolution.” harukas second voice drama is titled "Metamorphosis of the Weak"

"Because I want to hold you, I walk with my two legs. Because it’s lonely on my own, I breathe with you"

"Have you learned the words yet?"

"Hey, suck in my breath again now. I try to say “I love you,” but Instead I’m living my whole life as a sort of oxygen tank. Suck in the words I've spit out and breathe no more"

android girl:

By now I’d rather we build our own “Togetherland”. We’ll click together, so climb aboard. “Pay more attention to me, it’s not enough!”

“Oh, you’re so cute. What’s to be done about you?” I’m tired by now of the way. You resizing compliments makes my heart flutter.

I know I’m yours and yours alone, but do you even like “me”?

All my kisses with you hurt so much when they closed up my throat."

notes: harukas cover songs both focus on poor relationships, choking/the inability to breathe/etc. android girl also has elements of trap music, which is not present in two breaths walking, and as ive said before: trap music is primarily muu's motif

YUNO

sticky bug: "Say that you love me, say that you love me, Since there’s nothing else I need"

"So to put it simply, let’s start recording"

"Your smiling face, your embarrassed face as well. I want to catch every single one of your expressions! So not leaving out a single moment I’ll commit everything to memory."

"As for my dream, it’s to be that stickybug right by your side" "I say “goodnight” only so that I can say “good morning” tomorrow"

"Say that you love me, for if I’m lucky, then at any rate, I really want every single part of you…"

i dont have a lot of comments on this since i dont know yuno that well comparatively, but i do have a theory that yuno's "true murder" is actually tying up a man in her basement and torturing him for pleasure, so... haha which "stickybug" gives a lot of "im obsessed with you" vibes, and...

vampire: "“I can’t take it anymore” you're such a bad boy"

"I want to try it, I want to spit it all out, I can definitely go more"

"It’s Fxxx, it’s sxx, it’s pAxxxUx* Until I eat all of you, screeeeam!"

*

"Longing for someone and then letting that feeling wither is such a turn off. After crying and forgetting about it, it's back to “Hi, nice to meet you.”

"When I spit out everything I was hiding, they were all things that were like "That's so true!" "I reply with no after no, since selfishness is free, I get greedy and miss my chance again"

"It's addicting, right up to the part where I drown in it, screeeeeeeeeeam!!!" "“I can’t take it anymore” I want you to make me say it too"

notes: i really struggle with yunos character, she is surprisingly deceptive. i want to take the "mahiru is a stalker" theory and slap it on yuno, ok? her instrumentals are also very "yuno" and i have not noticed any motifs that connect her to another character

FUUTA

his songs do really feed into the "fuuta is a queer man" theory that i love

mozaik role: "A word bit into you, And I just described the liquid leaked from the wound as "love"

"Just like you and me who have fatal ties."Even so, I love you..." How's that?"

"What's wrong with loving you... I'll tie you, not let anyone to touch you. This must be fate, right?"

"As I don't even know whether it's love or lust, what should I do with giving out?"

"What's wrong with killing myself, if you hate me?" "Disappearing, disappearing, a world of love"

salamander: "Hey, Salamander! Hot is good, don’t you think so? Is it a big deal?" "It’s heating up inside my head" "If you know, I would like you to tell me first, ok?"

"I surrender, I’m already hooked, I can’t function without you anymore" "

"I can’t stop, I don’t want to stop! Make sure to cool it down so you don’t get burned" (*note: the vocaloidwiki says that the line is more along the lines of "make sure to blow on it, cool it down so you dont get burned" and uses "fuu~" (haha fuu~ta), the onomatopoeia for blowing air)

"As many times as possible, I want to be on fire when I reach the climax"

"I want to escape, but I’m not able to"

notes: salamander has a few focuses on guitar, remniscent of haruka's guitar motif. it also has a jazz solo, which, yknow- thats kazui's motif

MUU

mm,y favorit e lesabiam,,,

otome(maiden) dissection: "Let's play Maiden Dissection!"

"I've wanted to feel shame, ever since that night when I realized"

"Good evening, is now a good time?"

"Without you, none of that matters" "Both of us with our masks on, we flirted"

"Yeah, there's a kid there, lost in anything and everything, Shedding tears, meowing "SOS" with their eyes only halfway open"

"This disease, the whole package, I'll send it to you as an attachment. I don't wanna go so far as to share all the things that cause me pain. I just wanna run away from this love..."

"Calling each other by our real names "I don't wanna live" was what I should've said. Will I ever find peace?"

"Sorry for calling you so early. I must've woken you up, huh? Are you up to chat right now?"

"I had a dream where you fell in love with somebody else. Please tell me it's not true. C'mon, love me please?"

"Listen, you've been pretty cold lately"

"Pulling burning passion out of each other. I can't stand you telling me "no!" Will we ever clear up this misunderstanding?"

"Smearing drool on top of the "baguette" (haha get it bc muu is french? do you get it? are you listening to m

"I wanna feel shame, just like I did on that night when I realized"

"it's good as long as it hurts"

MKDR: "I went and said it, I want to be with you just one more time. No, no, to drag things out would be annoying. I’m sorry, come back Carbon dioxide, your atmospheric concentration"

"I want to soak in a dream of a swamp" (夢 muu's name, dream)

"Even if you tell me I’m selfish, I’ll just lap it up. It’s not uncertain, there’s no future. I want to be reborn with your face" (im struggling to find sources for this, but ive heard a few times that there is folklore that when you die, you are reborn with the face of your past life's lover.)

"I went and found out, Even if you flip over the words “I hate you” There’s no “I love you” hidden there"

"I’m mad with idealism, imagining a smile. My bloodshot wish will soon be relieved" "But there’s no love anywhere that’s “just fine”

"A melody of fools with nowhere to go. Retrying – rebirth – teleportation. The number of tries keeps accumulating at the mercy of an endless love"

"I detest love"

"Are you angry? … I’m not angry. We’re perfectly in sync and yet off the beat"

"If this were a movie or a TV show. Though I’d endure it until the credits. I wouldn’t want to watch it again. It’s all too cruel, from beginning to middle to end"

"But I still end up believing in a love that’s “just fine”

"The topography I protected by hating love is beginning to warp properly" (this part im not sure how well it actually translates into english..??? because "typography"... likely means "this person, this character, this ideal" since.. kanji/typography is super super important in jpn language)

"We’ll hurt each other over and over" "But I end up remembering the lie of “I’m just fine”

"I detest love"

notes: both of muu's songs use a lot of "soft trap" music, shes very mellow, and both songs focus very strongly on "painful love", unrequited love, love that hurts her. its likely both of these songs are about how she feels about rei. the music in MKDR also "dances" between your left and right headphones. ive yet to find motifs that connect her to another prisoner. there is a bit of piano in mkdr. there is bass and guitar in otome dissection that isnt in mkdr

SHIDOU

i hat e yo u i hate yuo. ohate you. triage link

liar dance: ""Stolen? Just whatever do you mean?""

"Having made a vow, to you and you alone. Declaring this loveless love of mine in front of you"

"Committing myself to this performance, set lines and all. Those memories we've desperately created and clung to, they blend together and feelings between us intensify"

"Blabbering on about stuff, could you shut up for a bit? Because everything is starting to look like a lie" "Yes, I've realized that we're both guilty here"

"Dance away, liar. This love has swelled up like a balloon, let's turn it into a lie with the prick of a needle. On the count of "I-love-you"

"Having hidden it away so that no one can touch it. A thirsty dance, carving that carbonated melody"

"Damn it! You figured it...wait, whatever are you talking about?" Screwing up time and again is no reason to drop the act. Having fallen into this bottomless swamp, will you even realize you're drowning?"

"Everyone and their brother is laughing at you. Even I've become unable to see you as anything but a lie. But somehow I still have these feelings for you"

"We're already partners in this crime called "love" "Turn me inside-out and I look just like you" "It's nice to meet you, "Crime" and Punishment"

"It's a bit scary, But the moon looks so beautiful, doesn't it?"

delusion tax: "Hey, that girl is pretty great... Her too!" Looks like you’re thinking some pretty nice thoughts over there... Are you really satisfied with just that?"

“That girl is alright… That one works too, I guess”

"Let’s pay the Delusion Tax. For the sake of making everyone’s life oh so wonderful…" "Turning wishes into reality, Right now, buy back your future!"

"That’s right, for all these dirty delusions, let’s settle the bill with this dirty money"

"Existing for your sake alone, mandatory affections and obligated kindness "NO!" to Though you should be satisfied, a voice from within shouts “NO!” We have an idiot on our hands, it seems..."

"Look, just up and borrow the "desired amount" Reality is a bitter-sweet pill to swallow"

"That which you wish for, the person you think of, The past which you hate as well, they’ll all be as you like."

"But those wishes won't really come true, even if you pay. For it’s all a lie, a great big farce. Thanks for all that, that's plenty. These scraps of paper belongs to me now"

notes: shidous cover songs are all over the place. "Liar Dance" has a lot of references to the other prisoners, the instrumentals are??? electronica? guitar? and a soft melody of piano, if you listen close enough. delusion tax goes strong with an instrument i can not place! it sounds, wooden in structure? but i dont know it off the top of my head. delusion tax has car alarms playing at certain points, it also features a piano melody. liar dance has a very small amount of jazz. theres a police scanner in liar dance and i cannot make out the words

ALSO THIS IS GETTING REALLY LONG... ill have to add the other 5 in a reblog,, oh god im so tired. my back hurts