#and then in the middle of that i wont be working for them for a week because i have to go work my on campus job
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biblically-accurate-dca · 5 months ago
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super disorganized sketch page because i do what i want
#my art#not sure if i wanna tag these... hrm#i wonder if alt text shows up in search results.... shudders#well anyway. i wanna ramble about these!!#for willy mafton: i've been working on designing more of the human cast. mainly all the big name important ones#it's been a slow process + a little challenging but i like getting the chance to practice drawing faces! :]#in regards to His design specifically.. it's very much based off of his movie apperance#but with a reference to that Classic sprite thrown in#bc i thought making him a little cartoony and inhuman would fit him :] but idk im not an expert on his character or anything#about the rabbit lady: i forgot how i had that idea initially but it ended up looking so fucking cool tbh#im always a fan of making her design less of a feminine eye candy type of design and more of a Spooky Murderer type >:3c#it also gave me the idea to try making some similar designs for the glams...#but if i do that im not gonna be giving them that vintage rubber mask look... since they're meant to be super flashy and high tech looking#so i was thinking they could have faces with more of a silicone texture.. and that have a style based more off of their in game art work :]#so they'd be like giant dolls with weird moving faces rather than having a vintage animatronic look#also that van in the bottom middle is 100% a homage to a specific user i wont be mentioning but iykyk HFJZJFJF#ANYWAY the 🌞🌜 stuff: dont be weird about it please HFJZJG#im aware that these tags are very easy to ignore but like. genuinely pls dont be weird about them#dont romanticize it. its not meant to be ''y/ndere'' or anything like that#its actually a bit personal to me so like... interpret it as you like but be aware its not meant to be a happy or positive thing#anyway i think thats all i have to say... i've been trying to branch out a tiny bit regarding the things i draw#it's always nice to challenge yourself even if its tough... especially if its tough!!#i mainly draw just for my own sake but i hope ppl see something they like here#these tags got so fucking long oops... i'll stop now JFKZJFKSJGKSJG
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thalassophobixodius · 6 days ago
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"shifting isn't real, you're all delusional" jokes on you! Reality shifting methods and such have HELPED ME COPE with my delusional disorders!!
Ex; preventing paranoid spirals into the delusions I have becoming/feeling Too Real and fucking Horrifying at times by shifting normalizing the thought of 1; everything is infinite, it's a common idea that we are CONSTANTLY shifting through different realities, and with that thought, the thought of being "not real, merely a character in someone else's mind" has also become normalized to me with the thought of; what if this world was created via someone thinking of an ideal place they wanted, and shifting Here? What if my delusions were somehow correct? Oddly enough to me, that is reassuring, as I'd finally have a Solid Fucking Answer, and alongside that; it's a fact that in the realities we make and shift to, everyone is still REAL!! Even IF the former idea that we were all created by the consciousness of someone else were true, that doesn't devalue or degrade our Reality as living breathing organisms with Real Lives.
Ex2; somatic cotards delusion is a delusional disorder where you feel you are legitimately dead/you died in the past at one point and are still here somehow/etc, my personal experience is that I believe I caused my own death at some point at a very very very young age and respawned or, alongside my other delusion I died and now what I'm experiencing is merely a simulation and I am actually in whatever the "afterlife" would be. I am convinced I am immortal, yet somehow also I could experience death at Any Second because I perhaps died ages ago and don't remember it;it could kick in when I least expect it, I experience this delusion in a very complicated way. But the thought that? There's people out there that are countless years old, have evaded death endlessly and many that have found the secret to immortality and I myself have scripted and pondered many ways to be immortal; maybe I Am immortal? Not quite yet, but maybe I was destined to be? I don't feel necessarily delusional about these things anymore, I don't feel to the point of "these things are inevitably real in my head but in a scary way because there's no real life way to find proof for myself in any direction negative or positive." I feel more like .. "oh.. maybe these things Are real? I've always been self aware of the delusion aspect of these thoughts, and therefore always known that even if in my head I'm convinced they're real, logically I can't know for sure. But now with this knowledge I feel canceled out, I feel less so on the 'these things are real and I'm spiraling into that scary fact' side of things and moreso on the 'these things are maybe possibly actually probably genuinely Real? And that's neat, I believe they're real as a genuine belief now and I feel like I've found balance. This doesn't feel like a delusional fear anymore, just a belief in a concept that could very very potentially be real."
It's like.. no one ever wants to tell you your delusions are real, because yeah obviously that'd fuck you UP right? But oddly enough for me, whether you'd consider this having enabled me or not; I am not terrified by these ideas anymore, I am not scared of these possible realities, I accept that they're possibly real and I believe in them; I no longer feel like my brain is Forcing me to see things that are fake as real to scare me, I now feel I have reclaimed my paranoia into my own personal beliefs.
Whether understandable or not, I deeply thank Everyone from the shifting community and I hope all of you get exactly what you need and exactly what you deserve, I hope we all do, I know we all will. I feel at peace with my own confusing brain for once finally, and I hope it's understandable how deeply much that means.
#flying.fish🌌#reality shifting#shiftblr#reality shift#shiftinconsciousness#shifting antis dni#shifting reality#shifting#shifting community#shifting realities#just like HEAVY on the shifting antis dni on this one#i know how i work and i know myself. i know im doing good and healthy and i know this is all a positive for me.#i do Not need people coming in here going “erhhrhmm actchually i think youre becoming More delusional”#like my guy the time i was the most delusional was when i was being repetetively told my delusions werent real and being shut down#so i couldnt even say anything about them without being treated like i was batshit insane#until i Became batshit insane due to that treatment#everyone requires different help and everyone heals differently. i thought for years it was the same for everyone with delusions; just..#stay in the middle. dont say yes dont say no. don't deny dont encourage. but honestly that drives me INSANE personally?#it feels like... similar situation w my autistic self#when i am so so convinced someone is mad at me but they just Will Not tell me whats going on#i am Doomed to spiral#my personal need is a form of confirmation that wont shock my brain into a spiral but will allow it to acclimate ig?#my parents barely listened to me about my delusional disorders. therapists pushed them aside to work on easier things. even people who also#have delusions entirely ignored me when i wanted to jus . ask for mild advice or Talk to people i can relate to#this. this has been the Only Thing that has healed me in this area#and that is why i laugh in the face of “reality shifting is a delusion”
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natjennie · 8 months ago
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anyone else out here a middle child saddled with eldest daughter responsibilities?
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kaeyapilled · 2 years ago
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i thjnk that in the end what bothers me about a lot of ragbros reconciliation fan content is that it seems to treat their making up as a single event. as if they just need to have one heartfelt conversation and apologize and hug each other and then they will be officially reconciliated. as if they wouldn't need to rebuild their relationship slowly! (as if they haven't already started to, albeit tentatively). as if they wouldn't need to first let go of old grievances, both the big ones and the little ones. let go of the guilt they place on both themselves and on each other. it cannot possibly happen in one night! it's learning to talk to each other again until it isn't awkward anymore. until the smallest annoyances stop bringing back all the bitterness to the surface. it's learning to open up to each other again! this time with no awful secrets between them! it's discussing those secrets! discussing their shared grief and making an effort to understand the sorrows they do not share. i cannot stress enough how much i want you to understand it needs to be a very painful very saddening but also very hopeful and maybe cathartic process
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atthebell · 11 months ago
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bell I do have a crochet question for you. how do you get better at freehanding things? is it just experience? bc I've been crocheting for a few years now but I still sweat if I can't find a pattern for what I want to make 😭
so my initial answer is just fuck around and find out-- as in just start making stuff, sometimes don't even try for a specific shape, just do stuff and see what shapes you make and get a feel for how increasing and decreasing impact a work, how to incorporate larger stitches (i.e. switch from sc to dc to make one side of the round taller), all that kind of stuff. and maybe try and make something purely based off an image-- as in, no pattern, no fucking clue how to go about it, just go at it and see what you get. it won't always be pretty, but it'll teach you! and practice helps immensely, so you can even just work on things you do have patterns for/know how to make and that will teach you how shapes come together and how to sculpt something (bc that's what amigurumi is, really, just figuring out how to sculpt something with loop & hook-- imo, it's what makes crochet pretty different to other fiber arts, although you can do 3-D stuff with them as well) into what you want.
my other answer is i've been crocheting for thirteen years and i consider myself pretty damn good at it and i still whine and cry when i can't find a pattern for what i want 😭 i think getting really good at tracking stuff down and also sometimes just resigning yourself to having to buy a pattern is really the answer. also, tbh, you can look at how someone else made it and try and replicate that without a pattern-- if you sell stuff, i recommend you still credit the original designer, since you are basing it off their work, but looking at how someone else made something and trying to do the same thing is how a lot of artists build technique. again, don't rip them off entirely, but going "how tf did they make this?" and trying to do something similar can help you learn more about how pieces are put together.
also ravelry, pinterest (if you know how to use it properly and are willing to deal with the spam/clickbait fake pins... bane of my existence), various pattern databases, and, tbh, just rando people's blogs are your best friend. i have a few amigurumi artists where when i'm just absolutely lost, i go on their sites and search up what i'm trying to make to see if they've done it before, and sometimes they have! elisa's crochet has really cute stuff, as does ami amour, and you can find way more people through instagram (the one and only time i will recommend going on that site)
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ketunhanska · 1 year ago
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a very quick little azemet to remind people i exist. hey, i exist! :3
(azem is helios, he/him)
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failsquirrel · 6 months ago
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the eternal question of if the fictional universe that is heavily analogous to the real world should have actual media from the real world or similarly named thinly veiled references
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unhinged-prosody · 10 months ago
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It's that time of he hyperfixation where I start wanting to make a crossover fanfiction with Firewatch
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coridallasmultipass · 3 months ago
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I am once again begging online shop payment processing companies to allow me to enter a separate name for shipping and separate name for billing!!
It's the same address, I'm just trans and have not legally changed my personal name, but I still prefer to receive mail as my preferred name! Like it's literally my professional name, I do business as my preferred name.
Annoying as fuck, and I don't want to chance my bank rejecting the payment (though I'm sure someone at my bank has put a note to allow it on my account by now, since I've contacted them a couple times before when I realized too late that the billing section didn't let me input another "address/name" section, and they said the payment was fine in those cases.)
Anyway, legal name changes should be free and non-advertised for everyone. Tbh, you should get a free name change every time you file your taxes on time as an incentive for good citizen behaviour. Once I am elected pres-
#i think the one i just used didnt even have a separate billing address option which makes no sense#guess they dont want anyone giving any gifts making the buyer pay twice for shipping like that#maybe it was a fault of the mobile browser but i highly doubt it since many desktop sites look like mobile browsers these days#just so fucking frustrating. what if i lived somewhere where my legal name would out me? (im in the closet rn so doesnt matter)#i dont want to fucking see my legal name. im already forced to see it everywhere else.#i dont wanna ruin my mood on a day when im supposed to be getting a package which should be a happy thing yknow#vent#transphobia#speaking of like i would change my name but i dont want to and cant afford the fucking ridiculous price for it#and i dont wanna advertise it in a newspaper either! shits expensive as fuck on top of the hundreds to file the court paperwork!#i already tried to do it once with money in hand and the receptionist told me that even tho it was for gender identity i could not...#...avoid the newspaper thing unless i also changed my legal gender marker. and i had to back out bc i have reproductive health problems#i dont want a gender marker change to fuck with my getting healthcare#(i did change the gender letter on my ID card later tho which only took a signature on a paper no hassle with anything)#it really really fucking sucks how all these little things add up all the time#especially when im closeted while living w family who wont even use my preferred name#the real kicker is that. both my dad and his dad used preferred names. my dad used his middle name#and i use part of my middle name. yet my dad even in death still gets the dignity of being called his preferred name and i dont#sexism at its finest#reasons why i dont even hint at being trans around my moms side bc i already got bullied by them for wanting to use my middle name#ive literally been asking them to call me my mid name since i was 12. and theyve been acting like im trying to be someone else#its the same middle name on my birth certificate they gave me. i dont understand why they wouldnt want me to use it#but yeah i stay closeted bc i dont wanna deal with the name drama amplified exponentially for gender#prob get kicked out too cuz theyre queerphobic as fuck and i cant work rn and dont have a car#id have to just go full feral and live in the woods with the lizards where i belong#Cori.exe#Post.exe#fuck lol just looked it up and u cant change ur first name if u get married. i cant avoid the fucking fee man. let me be cori#literally why is it cheaper to get married than change ur first name! bullshit! marriage has so much more legal implications#transphobic queerphobic aromanticphobic privacyphobic poorphobic shit ass fucking state ive literally been cori most of my life ffs cmon
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itsays · 5 months ago
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i didnt get the job and im mostly ok as long as another coworker didnt get it instead. like it has to be someone from outside of the company or im QUITTING
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avornalino · 6 months ago
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so sick and tired of technology why does everything i own keep breaking !!!!??!
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valentinesparda · 6 months ago
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psychic and physical damage being taken this weekend but first we have to get through the 3 hour drive
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clownboy-yeehonk · 11 months ago
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For my work secret santa I got a gift basket with wine, glasses, a candle, and a llama wine bottle holder thing, and when I thanked the girl who gave it to me she was so excited and told me how she looked so hard for a basket with the Llama because she knew I really liked them and it was just so sweet of her, but the thing is I've never actually had a strong opinion either way on llams. I have a couple scrub tops that have llamas on them (they're a popular pattern theme idk why) but I guess she got it in her head that they're my favorites (for the record my favorite animals are gorillas elephants and any kind of cat big or small)
And like first of all, I would now rather die than EVER let her know my ambivalence towards llamas, but also like...I think about that every time I see a llama now. I'm gonna go through the rest of my life remembering how this girl was so excited to get me something she thought I would like, and she also wrote a really nice card to go with it about me being a good friend, and not to sound like a fortune cookie but the thought does count and it was just so lovely and I'll never think of llamas the same way again bc I do love them now. Anyway love is transformative and also stored in the Llama wine bucket
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liquidstar · 1 year ago
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woe the agony of having a funny idea for an oc comic with characters i haven't even designed at all yet let alone shared publicly
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momomallowart · 1 year ago
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Been working on making some AoT fanart since the finale but I keep getting sidetracked...
but I figured I'd share this WIP bc I've been trying to share more! ʕ⁠ ⁠ꈍ⁠ᴥ⁠ꈍ⁠ʔっ✨
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cascadianights · 2 years ago
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People are always like "but you shouldn't need it to be you/your daughter/your wife" or "you shouldn't need some metaphor to understand" or "why are we watering this down for people" - Listen:
If I've learned anything by the (weak, watered down, unfocused) leftist reaction to the current attempted genocide of trans people, it is that very few people will act or put themselves in danger unless it DIRECTLY affects them. ESPECIALLY other minorities who are not multiply marginalized (w the understanding that can bring) but Do have a lot to lose.
That's not true for every person! Some people have a basic understanding of empathy and compassion. Some people have higher level critical thinking skills or kindness. But I hate to break it to you - all of those things (empathy compassion critical thinking even kindness) are SKILLS. They are not a given. They are rarely honed by accident. They are difficult and many times come at a cost to you to learn and practice.
People may not have these skills for a MILLION reasons, but many of them are linked to poverty and generational trauma, lack of funded public education, and living in a dystopian capitalistic society that prioritizes individualism and leaves barely any time or energy for thinking through complex ideologies unless you MAKE that time. None of those reasons are "they're just too dumb" or "they only have the capability for hate and evil."
There are people doing very bad, purposefully malicious, monstrous things - and they are still people. If we lose sight of that we lose sight of the lengths of dangers and kindness capable of EACH of us. Beyond those with real harmful intent, there are MANY MANY MANY more people who are letting themselves accept the wrong solutions to the same problems we all see. For example, many of them genuinely want to protect children! And they listened to the answers for how to do so given to them by church and state and friends.
THOSE are the people we need to make metaphors for, we need to connect with individually, we need to show how and why this will impact THEIR lives. In a perfect world where the entire American society wasn't run on "us v them" that wouldn't be necessary!!! But it is! Because they want to protect the people IN THEIR LIVES right now, not a theoretical kid somewhere else they can't imagine being anything like their own. They want to put food on the table and a roof above the heads of their family, and they have grasped onto ANYTHING that they think will let them keep providing that.
We need to show these people how easily their child could be the center of these debates. How limited a world their child will grow up in without access to information on different ways of being and existing. We need to show them how and why this will impact them, their daughters, their wives, because we need to break through that concrete wall of defensiveness, built and calcified by the words of politicians and leaders with malicious intent but hiding nothing but desperate fear. We need to make it personal, to make it real FOR THEM, to make it understandable without a college level degree of critical thinking analysis why and how this war will show up at their doorsteps too.
It's exhausting. It's hard!!! It's infuriating and invalidating and endless. But appealing to their humanity, in whatever means that must take, is the only way to thaw out those who may stand with us. Because if we stand alone, I know with every bone in my body we will fall alone as well.
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