yubathegnome

[yubathegnome]

when i say im ‘anti-hort’, pls know i’m joking. i am well aware that he is a FICTIONAL CHARACTER and any irritancy should be directed at the AUTHOR’S CHOICES. i am not very aware of reader power in combatting these things but when i say hort is a bad character, i mean NO hate to ppl who like hort; i just really am uncomfortable with young fans romanticising this idea of men incessantly chasing women who have clearly said no which is already romanticised in pop culture. you can like hort, he is kinda cute (idk), but i’m just trying to say; 

stan hort all you want but be aware of his shortcomings and his problematic nature.

 that’s it :) i shall now reread OTK so we can hv more discussions abt that instead.

[yubathegnome]

I SCREAMED FOR NO REASON

sophie when tedros asks agatha to the snow ball

[yubathegnome]

at this point, i will promote any anti-hort content while procrastinating writing a post on why i hate him so much (i have like 600 drafts). hophie was definitely fan service and having it as sophie’s ending suggests that:

(a) if you stalk a girl long enough and get jealous of anyone spending time with her including her own sister, you will eventually get to be with her - i think the incels would agree.

(b) sophie needs a man to be happy - lets be honest, because Soman made her reject Hort so many times, the ending feels rushed, almost as if sophie is settling for someone to just be with so she doesn’t have to third wheel on dates anymore. throughout the books, there is a criticism of sophie pursuing heteroromantic love interests such as rhian, rafal and tedros in order to gain power or status, not because she likes them as individuals. her ending up with hort is like “none of the other guys worked out so let me find the one straight guy who worships me and gives me security so i can feel fulfilled” - aka she continues to use people so she can have a traditional, idealistic “happy ending”. idek if that made sense but hophie basically destroys her character arc established in the school years where she realised her independence.

(maybe i should finish that hort hate essay... but don’t blame me if it is in all caps)

I Hate Hort.

That's it that's the post.

Just kidding! So it's come to my attention to people are making a Hort appreciation day (apparently it's the day before my birthday, I hate it here) and so now I'm just gonna rant.

(PS: this is my opinion, you don't need to agree and you're at perfect liberty to disagree! Just try to be civil in the comments please and thanks!)

The School Years

Okay so I never had an opinion on Hort in books 1+2, he was just,,, there... He didn't really have a purpose until book 3, and even then there was like 1 thing... He was a side character, meant to paralell to Radley in Gavaldon and show that Sophie is an attractive character. (Sound familiar? Go read @ofthickettumble 's meme about it!) He was never supposed to have a huge role like he did in TCY, which brings me to my next point.

The Camelot Years

(OTK SPOILERS)

So we all know that Hort was definitely a main character in TCY. But in becoming a main character, his personality was completely erased. Especially in OTK, his only purpose was becoming a man-wolf and being Sophie's love interest. I can't even remember a single thing he did in OTK besides split with Nicola and get with Sophie lol. He didn't really do anything spectacular except for his almost death:/

Hophie

This literally came out of nowhere. I knew Hicola was gonna split up, there was no way they were gonna be end game, especially with Hort's emotional cheating on her. But Hophie? For endgame??? Seriously???? They literally had no chemistry. I felt like most of OTK was Soman trying to convince the readers that Hophie makes sense when it just doesn't. The whole point of TLEA was for Sophie to realize she's happy on her own, not with a boy. She should've learned with Rhian in TCY too!! But no, Soman decides to give her a boyfriend. I hate it here :)

In conclusion I really hate Hort and wished he stayed a side character and I hate Hophie too and wished they never became canon. Thanks for reading, have a nice day.

[yubathegnome]

not to cause controversy or anything but Hort would 100% been on team Jacob

[yubathegnome]

are y’all aware that “enemies to lovers” is supposed to mean “people on opposing sides of a conflict fall in love” and not “an abuser/murderer/etc. and their personal victim fall in love”

like it’s about the star-crossed yearning, not abuse apologism

[yubathegnome]

”august” is one of my favourite songs on folklore while also being by far the most difficult one to listen to. I’ve never been in a love triangle, never been ”the other woman”, yet the song resonates deeply with me because I’ve never been anybody’s first choice. The woman who narrates ”august” didn’t mean as much to James as James meant to her, because like the song ”betty” proves, James was only ever thinking of Betty. It hits home because whether it’s romance or friendship or any kind of connection, I have so many memories that I look back on with fondness only to realise that I’ve never meant as much to other people as they mean to me. Much like the ”other woman”, I’m good for a temporary moment of connection, but never good enough for something more permanent; discarded and left behind the moment a better option presents itself. This is exactly what ”august” reminds me of, and it fucks me up every single time.

[yubathegnome]

ty this is such a cute idea. im kinda a hort hater so i guess enemies to lovers might work :)

hi i'm a taurus, latin, slytherin, ever, straight, female and like light academia/fairy-esque cottage core vibes mixed parisian cafe owner

hey hon!

i ship you with hort!

you and hort are very devoted to each other! hort is fascinated by latin and loves to ask you all about it. hort’s edgy aesthetic contrasts perfectly with your light style! outside activities are a treat for the two of you and when the weathers bad board games are a must!!

[yubathegnome]

omg beatrix x bettina would have been childhood rivals to lovers excellence

[otk spoilers]

the fact that bettina never got to reunite with tedros, get along with agatha, bicker with sophie over who's the better aunt, wholeheartedly support her mother taking back her kingdom, see her little brothers, join the knights of 11, solve court mysteries with tedros like a buddy cop movie, maybe even find love(? anyone? nicola/sophie/bettina??bettina/beatrix?!) is really hurting right now

[yubathegnome]

ok hear me out... tedros as robert pattinson as cedric diggory. bc lets be honest, tedros is a hufflepuff w gryffindor traits.

[yubathegnome]

the hunger games vs 1984

What matters more?

Storyline or the way it is articulated?

[yubathegnome]

morally grey/evil scientist characters are always like biochemical engineers or nuclear physicists or whatever but the people want VARIETY give me a story about a fucked up geologist for once

[yubathegnome]

Tedros: I wish you would just admit when you made a mistake

Agatha, stirring her coffee: I actually prefer it with salt

[yubathegnome]

on the depressing note, taylor has released 3 albums now since lorde has released melodrama. where is our lorde and savior? i miss her

[yubathegnome]

anadil and hester energy

my music taste is immaculate. dick game huge. i am friends with rodents. i am sexy and insane and i think that's cool of me. i am gay. the only flaw is that i'm evil

[yubathegnome]

ik this is old news but i cry every day knowing tedros is short. ah how ignorance was bliss... explains his napoleon complex i guess but rip to my vision of a tall king.

[yubathegnome]

when i say i want a cottagecore lifestyle, this is what i mean...

hobbits were the peak of civilization in tolkien verse. jobs were Gardening, Stall At The Farmer's Market, or Mailman. Shoes OFF, capris ON, 6 meals a day, high and fat as all shit. Names like Daddy Twofoot....why the fuck are we horny for elves

[yubathegnome]

man fuck living in the modern era and having to work and be productive. i just want to be an ancient roman lady purchasing art and other goods in one of those ettore forti paintings