#and then in the end- he stopped Riko from killing Neil

[obscureshipsandchips]

@detectivebambam

IDK and IDC if anyone here has read AFTG.

"He doesn't swing, so obviously he needs a push."

Andrew who swung at Neil with an exy racquet their first time meeting, knocking Neil off his feet. Neil who fell, whose breath was knocked out of him by Andrew.

It wasn't romantic, not yet, but christ was that not the biggest foreshadowing.

Andrew aggressively knocking the breath out of Neil repeatedly, and Neil falling harder and farther for him every time.

With a racquet, with a key, with family, with love.

[aftgtandn]

We're at a real risk of sounding like a broken record at this point but you guys are AMAZING!

We still can't believe how much support you all have shown the fest. From reblogs and retweets, to comments and joining in all the fun games, it's truly been a blast.

We really, really can't thank you enough! Our hearts are so full to see T&N fest be so fun for the second year in a row — and it's all your doing! Every fic, every piece of art, every work adopted, every meme, every comment left, every full bingo card, every rec. IT WAS ALL YOU.

To our creators in particular: we owe you THE WORLD. Thank you for being brilliant. Please make sure to tag us in all your claim posts so we can reblog them!

WITHOUT FURTHER ADO... here's the full list of works AND THEIR INCREDIBLY TALENTED CREATORS:

Are you Real? by Whyreme Rated Mature | 6052 words Andrew comes back from Easthaven but Neil isn't at Palmetto, where he promised he would be. If you ever wondered what it would be like if Andrew was present for the immediate aftermath of Christmas at the Nest, this one is for you.

[art] don't flinch. by ghostheroes Rated Gen | Art There's not that much space from the cheek to the eye. In the art piece we have for you today, Lola aims the lighter barely an inch higher.

echoes by doodleishere Rated Teen | 100 words What if Kevin didn't leave the next alone? In this flash fic, Jean gets out too when Riko's anger finally snaps.

Bite the hand by Ateiluj Rated Mature | 4515 words We all have asked the question: what was going through Andrew's mind during The Choking Incident? A question we might have not asked, however, is: what would happen if no one stopped him? Well, this fic answers both of those!

duck duck goose by glittersinnin Rated Gen | 2329 words When Andrew goes through Neil's duffel, Neil holds his tongue. It will take some patience for him to get adequate revenge. Patience... and some experience handling the local water foul.

Let Down by maydaykevin Rated Gen | 4132 words How would it affect Kevin and Andrew's deal if Kevin hit Andrew back when Andrew chokes him? How is their relationship impacted by this unexpected bout of violence between them? Find out in this fic!

If You're Throwing Me to the Lions by orionauriga Rated Teen | 3763 words It's not easy when your boyfriend comes with a whole lot of baggage, especially twin-brother-who-hates-you shaped baggage. It's not easy but it's worth it, for Aaron, and Katelyn knows how to stand her ground.

If I was easy to kill you would have done it already by lazarusthefirst Rated Mature | 9196 words They were always meant to be partners, now it's Jean's job to make sure Neil behaves. Neil isn't great at being a partner, but he knows partners don't leave each other behind. In this fic, Neil doesn't come back to Palmetto alone.

Butterfly Effect! Read More on Page 12 by animediac Rated Gen | 5194 words How much can the death of one character affect the narrative? Through newspaper and blog articles, emails and social media posts, that's exactly what this fic explores. How many lives can the butterfly effect of one unfortunate 'accident' change?

Nathaniel by nyaar0n Rated Gen | Art Neil Josten is a Fox, but what if he never got the chance to be? Nathaniel Wesninski is a Raven through and through, and in this art piece, he snatches the spotlight both on the court and with his partner.

Now it's Time to Live (and Turn to Dust) by Witheredcarnelians Rated Mature | 4573 words Renee makes it just in time to save Jean ... or does she? This fic explores the crushing guilt of leaving behind a loved one, and being unable to save them in the end.

caught up in you by rooftopkisses Rated Mature | 5463 words "What are you hoping for, coordinates?" Neil doesn't lock the door, and Nicky walks in on Neil and Andrew kissing. Nicky can be trusted — mostly because he fears Andrew's knife — but Andrew's tendency toward quiet implosion is a different story.

but i've walked this far by rwnjun Rated Teen | 14556 words When the countdown ends, Neil gets taken. His dad is dead, but manages to make substantial damage before he gets shot. Now Nathaniel gets to be Neil Josten, but who is Neil Josten if he can't play Exy?

i've been feeling smaller by neiljokesten (vykio) Rated Teen | 2433 words Over worrying and wound-tending, Aaron and Neil get caught on a never-ending loop of the pot calling the kettle black over sacrificing themselves to protect a loved one

a familiar face by Shinobimoon Rated Gen | 4184 words How would things have gone if Kevin had recognized Neil right away? Would Neil have run, or still signed with the Foxes? Read more in this fic!

Better Luck Next Time by AllAngstNoComfort Rated Mature | 7812 words What if Riko had gone for Aaron instead of Seth, that night? In this fic, we learn exactly that and how that affects the Foxes.

the most unkindest cut of all by deadangelo Rated Mature | 2550 words Riko Moriyama has been many things to Kevin Day: a friend, a brother, a partner, a monster. The die has been cast. Riko is going to die. This time around, Ichirou has a spectator seat saved for Kevin.

we want the young blood by undermoonwalker Rated Teen | Art What if Elodie was sold to the Ravens? What if Jean had a predetermined partner through all that darkness? This art looks at the possibilities of the Moreau Ravens!

you'll be alright (no one can hurt you now) by wesawbears Rated Teen | 1757 words Jeremy Knox can't figure out their newest recruit. But having some secrets of his own means that he can tell when something isn't right, and if there's one thing about the Trojans is that they protect their own.

as soft as feathers by delossanctuary Rated Mature | 4714 words What's a T&N fest without a devastating Abby fic? This year, ponder on this: what if Neil's finger slipped when he needed an airport pickup?

TKO by justadreamfox Rated Mature | 4733 words Remember that busboy Neil paid to knock him out? In today's T&N fic, Neil doesn't get left on the floor of the club afterwards. Not everyone is out to get him.

i know that i did you wrong (but will you trust me when i say that i'll make it up to you somehow) by evenfallwriter Rated Mature | 7076 words Neil gets something different for his 19th birthday: his father's death.

depraved heart by decaflondonfog Rated Mature | 7000 words There is a horrible scene at the Hemmick house. There is a dead man on the ground. There is Andrew, laughing. And then there is Kevin, standing with a bloody knife in hand and something far more potent than fear clawing at his rib cage.

kintsugi by gus_47 Rated Explicit | 4728 words Riko's violence knows no bounds; what if he didn't stop at Kevin's hand? This fic follows Jean as he weathers and grieves the aftermath of the Raven's ugliest secret.

The Mallard's Lullaby by Random2002 Rated Mature | 6313 words The Moreau family are good at business; why sell one child to an Exy empire when you can sell two? Good thing Elodie's got a stuffed duck, a pieced together first aid kit, and her brother. What more do you need?

Light in a prism by sassy_pen_sassy Rated Teen | 1030 words There's a life outside of the walls of the EAU Raven's nest; Jean learns what that's like with Renee by his side in this sweet fic.

not dead (yet) by ashestoashes7 Rated Mature | 13593 words When Andrew is released from Easthaven, only three of his charges are there to pick him up. He always knew Neil was a pipedream. If Andrew cared more, Neil could become a nightmare.

Digits by twolipsliterature Rated Teen | 2700 words A cheerleader and a Exy player on the run from his hitman father walk into a bar. This time, Neil gives Marissa his number instead of being an asshole for once.

shots fired by liaisun Rated Mature | Art Neil threw out the guns when his mother died, but today we take a look at how things might have gone if he hadn't.

Timing by HereBeChickens Rated Teen | 1116 words Kevin scores. Neil falls to his knees. ""You've always known what it's like to be second."" Riko swings. Andrew still gets there in time. But this is where we diverge.

presumably dead arm by kevjean Rated Mature | 15518 words What if someone else had found Kevin first after Riko broke his hand? What if that someone was special in a way that was never allowed before? In this fic, Kevin finds a slightly different way out of the Nest, and discovers something on the way.

and this is just my luck by starwarned Rated Teen | 2107 words Kevin Day is a star. He won't let a gay crisis get in his way. At least, that's the plan -- it becomes difficult for Kevin to maintain that dissonance after he overhears Andrew offering to blow Neil.

n'oublie pas de vivre by FireHeartAW Rated Teen | 5028 words What is left of Jean Moreau without Exy? Can he find a new place for himself without the Ravens even if his injuries prevent him from ever playing again? And what does he need to make that happen?

i am not scared of death, i've got dreams again by liliacskiess Rated Explicit | 5566 words Eden's back alleyway is not the place to be on a Friday night; Nicky learns that the hard way in today's fic which asks 'What if Andrew didn't arrive in time to fight Nicky's attackers'?

Back to the Old House by TearsOfATrickster Rated Teen | 6664 words Neil's not the only one willing to protect Andrew when he's at Easthaven. What if Kevin went back to EAU for Christmas?

Only Human by aquared46 Rated Mature | 2677 words “Shouldn’t I feel different? Powerful?” Neil survives his father, but the encounter leaves him with nightmares that seem like they should be good dreams. Andrew is there to listen as Neil tries to process.

Baltimore Basement by ConventionalExy Rated Mature | Art The apple doesn't fall far from the tree. In this art, Neil is taken to Baltimore by his father's people, but he knows his way around a cleaver.

The Graveyard Shift by KweenDay Rated Mature | 7100 words What if Andrew noticed there was something wrong in the locker room? What if Andrew stayed at Neil’s side? What if Andrew was brought to Baltimore too? In this fic we find out exactly what goes down behind the walls of the Wesninski manor.

the ongoing effects of growing a backbone by favbitchcharlie Rated Teen | 10641 words What if instead of giving Neil the plane ticket to EAU, Kevin tore it up? What if Neil let a bit of Nathaniel slip through? In this fic, Kevin and Neil go to break Andrew out of Easthaven in their own non-Coach-approved way.

The Prince and The Pauper by CherriPips Rated Mature | 8695 words After Riko broke his hand, Kevin went running to Wymack, but what if he saw Andrew first? In this fic, we find exactly how that interaction goes down.

Tear away at the Mask by Moondal Rated Teen | 2779 words What if more than one Fox had crossed paths with Neil in his past life? And what if this one particular Fox immediately recognized him, too? This is a fic about Natalie Shields, Nathaniel Wesninski, and about reinventing yourself.

scavenger's hunt by kiwiaok Rated Mature | 10341 words In a world where Lola survives her gunshot wounds in Baltimore, Neil has to face her once more during her trial, and things come to light that he would rather had stayed hidden.

Neil Josten Is Not Fine by the_greater_grief Rated Teen | 3362 words "In Neil’s dreams, Aaron never shows up to save the day." Neil's nightmares have become a problem even he can't ignore. When his sleeplessness begins to mess with his performance on the court, he gives in. Maybe Dobson isn't so bad, after all.

damage control by seasy33 Rated Mature | 11656 words When Andrew witnesses Nicky kissing Neil, his confidence in his plan to break Neil wavers. What can he stomach in his mission to keep his family safe? And what will it actually take to learn Neil's secrets?

patient violence by Mercey Rated Mature | 6981 words An orderly catches Dr. Proust and Andrew ends up escaping Easthaven early. Where to next? Well, Neil’s in the Nest and Andrew’s looking into a jailbreak. In this fic we find out what happens when Andrew goes to get Neil out of the Nest.

Deadliest Piece by LynxDoesArt Rated Explicit | Art When Neil realizes that something is wrong at the Hemmick's house, he rushes upstairs to find Andrew with the rest of the monsters close behind. What if Kevin got a hand on Neil's racquet before Aaron?

it lives in the throat by timeloops (kunimi) Rated Teen | 14440 words Switching places with your twin is fun, until… technically, Aaron Minyard dies in a car crash with his mother. But the dead body isn’t Aaron and now he must deal with the fallout of it all.

With all the love and appreciation in the world,

Your T&N'24 mods and helpers 💚

[ifitmeanslosingyouthenno]

au in which nathaniel is married to riko

okay so

in this universe there's no mafia, the moriyamas are just filthy rich businessmen, but nathan still is a serial killer

things go a bit different in the sense that nathan kills mary when neil is 10 bc he loses his temper and keeps neil practically captive in that house, torturing him endlessly until nathan slips up and somehow the fbi finds the evidence they need to raid the house when neil is idk 15 ish and they end up killing nathan and neil is sent to foster care

he doesn't have as bad a time in foster care as andrew did, some parents like slapping him around, but some are genuinely nice people

ultimately tho he's not adopted by anyone by the time he turns 18 (he tells himself he doesn't mind, who would want a damaged and quiet and sketchy and flighty kid in their family anyway?)

he's left on his own, to figure out how to be a real person, an adult, with no home, no place to stay, no friends, no family, nothing but himself

he goes through a few years where he just lives on the streets, spending the little money he has left on food, going to shelters when he can, traveling through states until he gets to new york

he's attacked and harassed by some guy at some point outside a bar or something and he's so dazed he cant even fight back, but someone fights back for him

and its riko moriyama, famous fucking exy star and professional athlete

he saves neil and he takes him to his place, where he lets him stay and recover and hey, he's actually kind of sweet, and he really cares about neil, and maybe it wouldn't be so bad to stay with him? and when riko kisses him the first time maybe its not so bad? and maybe when they start dating he's incredibly loving and he gives him gifts and it's the happiest neil has been? and maybe when riko proposes neil says yes and they get married and they're happy? genuinely happy for once?

except that at some point, the love becomes anger, the sweet gestures become punches, the care becomes jealousy and control and pain, and what was the best thing in neils life becomes a nightmare once more

(and maybe he blames himself, maybe its neil thats the problem, maybe its him who brings out the worst in people, maybe he's doomed to this cycle of abuse)

its not until riko beats neil withing an inch of his life that neil runs

OH SHIT WAIT LMAO I FORGOT TO SAY

neil doesn't actually go by neil throughout all of this, he still goes by nathaniel, his legal name, nathaniel wesninski is married to riko moriyama not neil josten

so neil runs and runs and runs with what little money he could steal from riko and he adopts neil josten's identity until he physically cannot keep going

luckily for him, his collapse happens far enough, all the way in seattle in the same pharmacy that medical intern aaron minyard was buying some supplies

so yeah aaron freaks out and almost calls an ambulance but neil stops him bc he's scared bc riko might not have mafia connections in this universe but he has so much fucking money

and it takes aaron and katelyn and abby on the phone for them to fix a heavily beat up neil who should definitely go to the hospital but this is the best they can do

(aaron just assumes he's homeless, and he cant pay the hospital, and he's a fucking softie deep inside so he does everything he can to help how he can)

and maybe when kate catches neil sneaking out one night, she does everything to stop him and offers him safety and maybe the exchange some truths, maybe kate guesses that neil had someone that abused him, maybe someone he loved and neil is scared and he doesn't feel like he can trust anyone but something about kate makes him break down and tell her what he can while making sure he doesn't reveal much

and im taking too long but basically aaron and kate take neil in and they introduce him to the foxes and to the legendary kevin day and andrew minyard, professional exy players for the seattle exy team

and well it takes time and lots of trust before neil lets himself open up again

but its in the form of andrew minyard and the way they can both respect each others boundaries, and neil tells andrew about nathan, but never reveals the truth about being married or anything about riko moriyama

until andrew asks neil to marry him and well

it all goes to shit lol

neil cant bring himself to tell andrew the truth and it all becomes a mess and andrew breaks things up and neil becomes a mess as well

(bc its true, it's on him, its always on him and god he never learns, he never fucking learns, he doesn't fucking get happy endings, he doesn't fucking get good things)

and he tries to leave aaron and kate's place again, and he's successful this time and he's on his way out of seattle when he stops by a gas station to get some food and he has no idea of where he's going and he hesitates for a while, until he catches the eye of andrew on his car outside, and andrew just looks away and leaves and-

and if neil was hesitating before he's sure now and he has to leave for good and he has to leave and get away and never come back and

and he runs right into riko moriyama as he's leaving the store

to be continued maybe??

part 2

[jtl-fics]

Fluent Freshman - Part 40

PREV

The Winter Banquet.

Where the Spring Championship announcements happen for Collegiate Exy. A formal event meant to allow the ERC to showcase how their stars weren’t just brutes on the court. Look at how beautiful and handsome they all were. Look at how they danced together. Look at the smiles and laughter and-

Wait.

No.

Put that down.

Who had the great idea to put the Jackals next to the Terrapins? Things have been tense between the teams since the Captain of the Terrapins stole the Captain of the Jackal’s date during the Fall Banquet!

I thought we all agreed that there would never be any more steak knives! What was the point of paying for all the pre-cut tenderloins if we’re just going to give them steak knives?! 

Really gotta find an intern to pin this fiasco on.

Oh great the Foxes are leaving! Did we even get a picture of Kevin Day in his suit? Fuck it’s going to be a two intern firing kind of day isn’t it.

Someone get an eye on the Ravens before they try and grab some hapless idiot and sacrifice him to revive Riko Moriyama. If there’s even one more damn tabloid with a blurry photo of ‘Riko Moriyama’ to prove that his death was faked then heads will roll.

Honestly, the biopic that some Edgar Allan Film student is making about him seems pretty interesting. The ERC just wishes people would stop taking pics of the ‘lead actor’ and sending it to tabloids as proof that the King hadn’t died.

Fuck, the Foxes left before we got any decent pictures.

Well just great.

You’d think that after all these years of the Foxes leaving early they’d have learned that getting pictures as they arrive is the most important thing. 

Oh thank god it looks like the Trojans are starting to mediate the fight. You can always count on good ol’ Jeremy.

Fuck.

A Raven got too close to Jean Moreau and now Jeremy Knox has punched a Backliner. Great. The Trojans have formed ranks around Moreau but the kid’s just too damn tall. Someone has hit him in the head with an especially saucy meatball, he’s not injured, just confused. The Trojans are acting like it’s a gunshot he just took to the head.

The refreshment table just seemed to collapse in on itself and god wasn’t that just an allegory for this entire damn evening.

Anita Flores sighs as she watches yet another banquet go down in a riot. Honestly, she doesn’t know why they think these will end up differently. She finds herself often missing when she used to coordinate banquets for football teams.

She sighs and thinks about her least favorite interns.

Alex had been getting a bit too cocky lately. He’d make a good sacrifice.

***

(Three hours earlier)

The Palmetto State Foxes were on their way to the Winter Banquet. From what FF understood it was categorically always a 90% chance of a shitshow. Honestly FF was surprised that the percentage was that low.

There was a general tenseness in the air surrounding it that went beyond the Banquet’s propensity to become a fight. 

This year the Winter Banquet was going to be held up at the Binghamton Bearcat’s stadium. The nation knew the story from the news and FF knew the story from both that and from the Foxes themselves who were there at the time in bits and pieces.

Captain Neil had been kidnapped from this stadium and then he’d been tortured. FF hadn’t even been on the team when it had happened and he was anxious about Captain Neil going anywhere near the stadium.

“He was just…he was just gone.” Matt had said, “Neil was gone and Kevin said that he was probably dead when Andrew got back with his phone.” He continued as the two of them sat up late in the living room of the dorm one night back in early October.

“I thought Andrew was going to kill me y’know.” Kevin had said bottle in hand as FF tried to help him up the stairs because apparently he would 100% guarantee vomit if he was in the nausea box. “I thought that maybe I deserved it, since I didn’t help Neil. I just let him walk to his death.” He said and despite assurances that he wouldn’t puke FF’s shoes did not make it through that journey unscathed.

“We called…we called everywhere.” Nicky had stared up at the ceiling of his hospital room, “Andrew was adamant that he was still alive even though Kevin kept saying he was dead and that dead was the nicest thing he could hope for. I thought that was a terrible thing to say.” Nicky curled up closer to him.

“I told you, Andrew dragged me like I was nothing to get to Neil. I don’t think he even noticed the guns.” Wymack said to Abby as the two sat on the back porch during Aras’ going away party. “His eyes were on Neil.” he gestures towards where Andrew was watching Captain Neil wrestle with Matt.

“He looked like shit.” Aaron had said unable to stomach a diagram of different degrees of burn in his medical book. “At least he was alive.” He adds.

“A hero.” Andrew’s voice had been what could be considered teasing from Andrew, “Someone who looks like her.” he had said touching Captain Neil’s burn scars as they drove away from the stadium after coming back to pick FF up.

Captain Neil had come to him the day before they were set to drive out, “Take me somewhere no one will find me for an hour.” FF hadn’t quite understood what Captain Neil meant, he never hid anywhere. People just failed to realize where he was.

“Ok.” he says instead of trying to explain because being unnoticed means no one hid codes from him.

The roof of the Library wasn’t that much different from the roof of the Tower, only that it was taller and bigger. Captain Neil had shut his phone off after texting something, likely to Andrew, and then put it into his pocket.

FF settled on the roof, sat with his back against a heating vent to stay warm. Captain Neil settled next to him and they sat in silence. It felt like back at the start of this where Captain Neil and Andrew would come find him and just sit in silence. 

It was nice. He had missed-

“They act like the stadium is the thing that kidnapped me.” Captain Neil says.

Oh okay, quiet time is over apparently.

FF doesn’t say anything, figuring that nothing he could say right now would be the right thing and maybe Captain Neil just needs to talk through some stuff.

“That stadium is where I thought I’d have my last good memory.” Captain Neil explains, “I’m not scared of it and yet Andrew’s acting like I’ll die if I’m left alone for more than 2 seconds while we’re there. Every time we go there they all act like the most important thing in the world is that I get on that bus at the end of the night.” Captain Neil explains.

FF does remember how Andrew had grabbed Captain Neil after their October game up in Binghamton. How Captain Neil had complained bitterly but had gone after looking at Andrew.

“He’s dead!” Captain Neil exclaimed and FF couldn’t help but look over at the entrance and hoped no one heard them. “He’s dead! I watched him get shot! He can’t kidnap me again!” Captain Neil continued to yell and FF couldn’t help but worry that they’d be heard below, or worse bother a student trying to study below.

FF reached out and touched Captain Neil’s arm and bright blue eyes turned to him, “We’re on a library. Don’t yell.” FF said and Captain Neil looked at him incredulously.

Then he laughed. He laughed and laughed and FF was worried that he’d gone and broken his Captain.

He suddenly felt bad about his own bout of hysterical laughter a while back.

“Thanks Smith.” Captain Neil had said with a smile.

They had sat up there until it was dark and Andrew had started calling FF’s phone and Captain Neil took the call to say he was coming back.

Now they’re on the bus, dressed nicely, and on their way up to Binghamton’s stadium. Captain Neil and Andrew are hidden in the far back of the bus with Andrew looking far more like a watchdog than anything else the closer they got to their destination.

Captain Neil had seemed largely resigned to this treatment at this point. Eventually they were at the stadium and shown to their seats. They were sat across from the Trojans and it seemed like the rest of the team was quite pleased with that.

“Smith!” Captain Jeremy Knox is smiling at him, “Nice to see you again bud, nice name change too.” he says.

“It’s nice to see you too, Captain Jeremy.” FF says and doesn’t notice how Captain Neil’s head whips around to look at him.

“You two know each other?” Nicky asks looking between the two of them with excitement.

“Of course! We offered Smith a spot at the USC Trojans.” Captain Jeremy says and FF feels his stomach cramp at the memory.

That had been terrifying.

Coach Rheman and Captain Jeremy wanted to sit down to make their offer with his parents. He was still 17 and unable to sign anything legal without their permission. He’d tried to decline and move past them and Captain Jeremy had put the final nail in the coffin at the time for any thought that he could go to college on the power of his apparent Exy capabilities.

“I saw in your file that you have brothers! USC always gives a second look at student applicants who already have siblings in the university. You could go to school with your brothers!” he had smiled brightly like he wasn’t issuing FF one of the most terrifying threats he’d ever heard in his entire life.

He had given the firmest ‘No thank you, I’m not interested in playing Exy in college.’ he could and was running to his Grandma’s to breath into a bag for twenty minutes.

“I see you changed your mind about playing Exy in college.” Captain Jeremy said with the same smile that still feels like a threat.

“Coach Wymack and Captain Dan were convincing.” he says and looks to see if there’s any way he can move further away from Captain Jeremy’s attention.

“Can I ask what convinced you to be a Fox?” Captain Jeremy asks, “I’m always trying to see what support we should be offering. I found out last year that we missed out on Andrew because we didn’t offer spots to Aaron or Nicky. I thought since you had brothers that’d be the thing that got you.” Captain Jeremy leans across the table but stops when he notices the Foxes all tense. “Whoa, what’s up?” he asks.

Jean Moreau sighs from next to Captain Jeremy, “Not everyone wants to go to college with their family, Jeremy.” Jean says, “Did it not cross your mind that he changed his entire name?” he asks with a raised brow.

Jeremy blinks, “Oh,” he looks at FF, “I guess that wasn’t the right thing to offer.” he says leaning back in his chair.

“I guess I should thank you for offering that?” Nicky says wryly before turning to look at FF, “You look better in orange anyways.” he says.

“Thank you Nicky.” FF returns loyally.

The banquet gets started shortly afterwards. Food is served. The bar is opened. People are talking. FF finds himself relaxing the longer the conversations around him go on. Matt is talking with a backliner on the Trojan line named Todd in good cheer. Captain Neil, Kevin, and Jean are all talking about the latest updates with Ichirou in French with the occasional gesture towards FF. Jean Moreau looks at him with a raised eyebrow but gives him a single nod when Captain Neil explains what happened.

Jeremy is chatting with Jack and even Jack was finding it hard to maintain his usual level of rudeness in the face of such unbridled positive energy. Nicky was talking with Katelyn and Alvarez. Aaron was chatting with a fellow med student college athlete who was an offensive dealer. 

It was shaping up to be a good night.

MASTERPOST FOR ALL PARTS OF FLUENT FRESHMAN AU

NEXT

[carbon-dated-gal]

My personal HCs of Jeaneil bestfriendism

Tws: mentions of human trafficking, sh, injuries, parent death (Mary).

(Also set in Raven!Neil AU)

•Nathaniel willingly participates in human trafficking after Mary's death, b'cuz fuck you. Living without any real destination had killed Mary's humanity and identity and he's not going to end up like her.

•Belonging to someone, meant having their brand on your back (literally) and that was going to be his saving.

•But for better for worse, ichirou was the one to pay millions of dollars for someone something like him

•ofc, this meant Nathan couldn't touch him but it also meant he would end up in the exact same place that his mum had died for

•but that was when she doubted his capabilities in exy but now that variable was taken out, no?

•By the time abram arrives at Evermore, Jean already had been living there for an year

•anyway, jean and Nathaniel meet when they were both 15 yrs old. And due them both being in hard rebellious phase, they take swings and jabs at each other cuz well...

•they were about the only ones who saw each other as equal instead being something either above or below them

•he Goes by his middle name w both Jean and kev

•Jean picks out all the bell peppers from his meal and Neil sneaks them onto Kev's plate who begrudgingly eats them

•Codependency, man. So much codependency. You'll never see one w/o the other

•sometimes when Nathaniel/abram (ur pick) sneaks them out, it starts raining and jean immediately hates it. But his partner catches a couple droplets into his hand and he flicks them onto jean, smiling like he had no demons waiting for him back home

•and jean thinks the rain might not be so bad.

•post-game interview and reporters are onto jean asking him one intrusive question after and jean just glares at them. Flat eyes and all.

•'Ram jumps in, and asks the reporter why their mum doesn't love them and maybe that's the reason they turned out like this in life— Kev pulls him away by his collar, apologising to the reporter

•they get into trouble for that ofc

•when Kevin begs jean to help him after riko breaks his hand, abram tries to stop him. He knows they'll have to pay the price but the look jean gives him is absolutely heartbreaking, "it's Kevin, abram. We have to help him."

•Nathaniel doesn't help. But hours later, when riko asks about Kev's whereabouts, he steals himself and refuses to answer.

•stitching each other while trying to make the other one keep their head down. With, Nathaniel's presence in the nest, jean finds keeping his opinion to himself... A bit harder than in canon.

•"why the actual fuck is that man wearing fucking jorts here?"

"I dunno, jean. They look kinda cool"

"I'm sorry, cool?"

•abram: "yk, that one time when you took a step towards the right with riko, you'd have reached him faster if you skipped on ahead to him—"

Jean, dead tired and barely even listening: "jfc, it's 2.30 in the morning go tf to sleep."

•abram was the one to snatch away the blades from jean. He hides them and cradles Jean's face in his hands, avoiding the bruises. That was the first time Nathaniel had seen a man that vulnerable and comfortable around him

•after kev leaves, Nathaniel tries to take over his job by swallowing the vegetables from Jean's plate. He promptly spat out that piece of broccoli.

I have more ofc, but I feel this post is becoming a bit too long so.

[palmettoshenanigans]

Aftg is really a Shakespearean tragedy. I’m learning about Titus right now and just.. Nora really checked all the boxes for a Shakespearean tragedy

Hello Anon Bestie, I've returned from war with my essay as promised! Okay, quick and dirty Betty Crocker Box recipe for a Shakespearean Tragedy (nuance and academic rigor not included):

A person with a flaw that can get em killed - spoiler: it gets em killed. (Tragic Hero + Hamartia)

Ghosts, witches, gods, oh my! (Supernatural Elements)

Good deeds go unnoticed and bad deeds go unpunished and everyone dies, hero included (Tragic Waste + Lack of Poetic Justice)

Look Anon Bestie, I took pages of notes, and I was almost going to talk about how everyone's Hamartia (Ambition, Devotion/Loyalty, Power, etc) were just functions of Love where Exy was the conduit everyone had in common. I even almost talked about the importance of how everyone's Deep Wounds had their origins in Parents (sins of the father, parental neglect and attachment, parents as one's first lesson on love). And THEN I almost talked about how neither villains nor heroes are born, they're made and the personal decision to remake one's self in the aftermath of the forge that shaped you-

But fuck all that honestly. All I care about here is the classic Tragic Hero and Tragic Waste hooplah. "The hero dies in the end" and all that.

I know what you're probably thinking, "But Tragic Waste doesn't apply to AFTG because the Tragic Hero doesn't die in the end! Neil is alive and so are all the Foxes!" I get it, I do, but here's my take. The Tragic Hero isn't Neil.

It's Nathaniel.

Which immediately brings me to my opinion on how AFTG manages to have a Supernatural Element as well. "But AFTG takes place in the real world!" stop interrupting me- listen- Neil isn't fucking real. He is not a real boy. Pinocchio in his wood state is more real than Neil is. Andrew knew Neil wasn't real from the fucking jump and was on that boy like white on rice. Nathaniel knew Neil wasn't real - how many times did he try to hold back his home grown Smart Mouth A La Attitude Problem for the sake of his store bought Meek and Mild disposition? AKA how many times did he suppress his Material because it would ruin the integrity of his Form? From page one our Tragic Hero was Nathaniel Wesninski trying to survive blah blah blah pretend to be Neil blah blah blah leave Nathaniel buried in Baltimore with his father yadda yadda roll credits- Throughout the entire first three books Neil Josten starts basically obtaining Life and haunting the narrative. He was a painting that triggered the uncanny valley, he was a statue that seemed like it was gonna reach out and touch you, he was a mask that accidentally welded itself to your face like that one movie from the mid-90s. Nathaniel is trying to beat this fake-boy back with a stick while also keeping his name but it doesn't fucking work that way. Neil wanted friends. Neil wanted Exy. Neil wanted a home. Neil wanted to stay. Nathaniel? He could have had friends and a home and Exy in another life. But Mary rewrote history and said "Put on these masks. Hide, Nathaniel. These masks will help keep you safe." And it was working tbh. But then one of them came to life. And our Tragic Hero died to make room for him.

Whoops.

There's nothing fancy about my arguement here, only that AFTG really does fulfill the Shakespearean Tragedy format, Supernatural Elements and Hero Dies and all. Anyway, here's a couple excerpts from my notes that didn't make the cut in my final essay: "The tragedy? All the villans are dead. Drake, Riko, Nathan, etc. But the ghost will forever haunt the house (flashbacks, nightmares, triggers, scars) and those who remain inheret the ruins they didn't raze (Ichiro, Exy)." "The hero dies and the villain dies but both good and evil still prevail so catharsis is bittersweet and yet that's what makes it the most realistic."

[fortheloveofexy]

you’ve made me think about ichirou as a foil to neil and now i can’t stop thinking about it!!! 

both heirs to empires they never chose, both inheriting horrors no child should ever witness. both having their edges carefully and strategically chiseled off and smoothed over in order to fit their fathers’ shadows. and the difference being that neil’s mother was around and neil’s mother got him out and neil’s mother couldn’t save him but still shielded him from the worst of it. and ichirou had no one to do that for him. neil escaped the same fate that ichirou became resigned to

OH AND the significance of ichirou being the one to ultimately “free” all of them in the end?? aaahh!!!!

- @you-know-i-get-itt

He is SUCH a foil for Neil!! Also his relationship (or lack thereof) with Riko is also a foil for the Twinyards in a lot of ways.

Both separated at a young age, never allowed to know one another, one brother desperate to reach out and connect while the other appears indifferent... (the difference being that Andrew feigned indifference in an attempt to protect Aaron, while Ichirou was indifferent because he was raised to believe Riko was worthless). The Twinyards killing for each other without hesitation versus Ichirou who kills Riko without batting an eye... I could go on and on.

Then you add in how he's a foil for Allison (the heiress who walked away from everything versus the heir who could never escape) and it's just 🤌🏻 so damn good

[codename-adler]

all i’m saying is, did Kayleigh Day really die?

we never did “see” a body after all. no proof from a trustworthy source, at least. sure, it’s on theme for the found family of assholes with no parental supervision whatsoever, but what if?

all i’m saying is, Kayleigh Day did not need to die, so did she really?

Tilda Minyard needed to die, because it was the only way to get her out of the way for good and to stop her from hurting Aaron. she needed to die because the twins needed to go to Nicky, and the twins needed an unforgivable rift thrown between them. and Andrew personally saw to that. confirmed kill #1.

Mary Hatford needed to die, because it was the only way to unleash Neil and push him in the Foxes’ arms. she needed to die because without her Neil is let loose, halfway there to freedom, and Andrew. she’s the trigger. and Neil personally witnessed her demise. confirmed kill #2.

Seth Gordon needed to die, because the Foxes had to come together. did he od by accident? on purpose? was there a certain mafia involved? we don’t know. but Wymack called, and the Foxes did go on without him, for the better. confirmed kill #3.

Drake Spear needed to die because he’s an evil monster piece of shit. Aaron personally got rid of the trash. confirmed kill #4.

Kengo Moriyama needed to die, because Riko Moriyama needed to die. and Ichirou needed to pull the trigger on the last one. Ichirou would never come into power were his father not dead for good. confirmed kill #5.

Nathan Wesninski needed to die, because Neil needed to be real, and free. Nathan needed to die because as long as he was alive, Neil couldn’t keep on living, could never stop running. Neil personally lived the moment he was set free by his uncle. even the FBI collected the leftover garbage. confirmed kill #6.

Riko Moriyama didn’t necessarily need to die, but he did. shot fast and true. karma came and collected, by the hand of Ichirou. confirmed kill #7.

what do all of these deaths have in common? trustful information. absolutely no gray area; done deal. also, major turning plot points unsolvable by anything else than death. none of the resolutions or conflicts work unless there is an absolute zero chance of the threat coming back. the story cannot progress if any of these characters comes back from the dead, and so the narrative makes it explicitly clear that each of them is cold turkey.

except Kayleigh Day. the only two nebulous circumstances surrounding death in the series are Seth’s and Kayleigh’s. both deaths are Moriyama-tainted. however, Seth’s case is unsolved because we’ll never know who really pulled the plug. Wymack, the only trustworthy reference, confirms Seth’s death without a shadow of a doubt.

Kayleigh’s death is reported by the Moriyamas.

Kayleigh needed to be removed, because Tetsuji and Riko needed Kevin for themselves.

Kayleigh’s death is the only “accident” in the series, outside of Seth, but as previously said, there’s reasonable doubt there too.

Kayleigh’s death is the only pre-canon death that does not show a body. Andrew took care of Tilda; Neil took care of Mary.

Kayleigh’s death is the only one reported by the enemy.

Kayleigh’s death is the only one not discussed in heavy details.

all clues point to the Moriyamas orchestrating her car accident, but what if it’s more? what if it goes as far as faking her death? what if she’s alive somewhere, sequestered? what if she’s alive somewhere, undercover?

as TKM ends, we witness the beginning of Tetsuji and the Raven empire’s fall, Nathan’s fall, and the Moriyama empire being reshaped by a new leader. but it stops before the repercussions unfold. before we actually get to see everything that entails, what other secrets, irrelevant to Neil’s journey, are waiting to come out.

what if the resurrection of the Mother of Exy is one of them?

[achenetype]

i hope you're okay with more questions because now your riko is in my head 24/7. you said a plot point is that he ends up joining the foxes too, how does that happen! leaving the ravens - the very thing he was raised to be from the beginning. my mind just circles back to how would tetsuji respond to that. does riko do it out of his own will, or does he need a little tug? when does it happen? both kevin and reader are now dressed in orange, and riko belongs with them soo

oh believe me he's in my head 24/7 too. i have so many thoughts about how riko ends up defecting from the ravens.

here's the playlist for this concept, by the way....

quick cw for violence (attempted murder, fun!), guns, ravens-typical cult behavior, brief suicidal ideation, and self-harm

in short, riko's decision to leave the Ravens has something to do with the gaping hole in his chest that's been there ever since kevin left. to be fair, the hole was always there; it was just less noticeable when kevin was with him. kevin's easy smile softened riko's edges, and you did the same thing, when you showed up.

it has something to do with you, too.

riko thinks about it, sometimes: how perfect it could have been with you as part of the perfect court. you, and him, and kevin and nathaniel or neil or whatever he's calling himself now, and that goalkeeper that turned them down. maybe jean, too, if jean could have straightened out his act a little bit more. if riko hadn't fucked him up the way he did. if riko hadn't fucked all of you up the way that he did, or his father and his uncle and his brother hadn't done it to him, or if none of you had ever played exy in the first place.

if exy had never existed, would you be friends?

riko thinks if exy had never existed, he might have killed himself years ago. or maybe he'd be shujin or oyabun somewhere back in japan, and he would be just as fucked up as he is now, just with more bodies in his wake.

it's kind of funny that this is what he's thinking about as the barrel of his brother's glock 19 (a nine-millimeter automatic pistol, the kind that riko learned to shoot at the age of ten, firing at paper targets in the shooting range with his uncle) presses against the side of his head. how fucked up is it that instead of fighting back, instead of begging for his life like people are supposed to do when they're about to be shot in cold blood, he's thinking, hey, what if none of this ever happened? what if you're dead already? hey, what if—

he doesn't have time to think about anything else because the gun slips for a second and then kicks against the side of his head. he smells blood, gunpowder. nothing is real anymore, because what if you're dead already? has just become true. that small metal torpedo cleaves through keratin and flesh and bone and finally stills when it's pressed right up against his blood-brain barrier.

but by that time riko is already gone. by that time, his body is slumped on the floor and isn't it lucky that they're still in castle evermore, isn't it so fucking lucky, because if his brother had taken him back to japan to kill him there would be no chance of you opening the door and finding him.

you wouldn't be able to drag him out of the front of the stadium and pack his body into the backseat of your car—your Raven car, with black seats and tinted windows and half a gram of coke in the center console, and drive like hell to the nearest hospital. there would be no emergency room, no neurosurgeon to take the bullet out of his head and cover the wound with sterile gauze and antiseptic.

when riko wakes up, he has twenty stitches in the left side of his head and his right hand won't stop shaking. the doctor says nerve damage. the doctor says can we call your family.

before riko can say anything, you cut in with a no that feels the same way as his arm snapping under the racquet of that Fox goalkeeper. you tell the doctor that riko has designated you as medical power of attorney, that both of you are over the age of eighteen and therefore fully protected by doctor-patient confidentiality laws. you tell the doctor the names of six lawyers who would be happy to have his license by the end of the week if any contact is made from the hospital to edgar allan university, tetsuji moriyama, or anyone else who you didn't screen beforehand.

he's almost proud when he sees that fire light in you. that's a Raven, right there, he thinks. that's one of my Ravens.

three weeks later you are on the phone in his hospital room. you're dressed in new clothes, a pair of faded black jeans and a deep red sweater. he supposes old habits die hard. or never die at all. old habits grow up with you and grow into you until you can't separate them from your own bones. it's the same reason why riko can't get up from the bed on the left side, the same reason he sleeps in sixteen-hour day intervals.

it's the same reason you're calling kevin, in riko's room, on riko's phone. it's probably the same reason kevin picked up the call.

you're telling kevin something hushed, your voice flickering in and out of vocal fry. "he's alive," you're saying. "twenty stitches, the doctor said brain damage, but he's walking, and he remembers everything—no, shujin has no idea—yeah, yeah, day, i don't give a fuck what you have to do. you get your ass up here, uh, saint francis memorial. ask for room 302. better yet, i'll meet you in the lobby—" and riko can't listen anymore, he can't hear kevin hear what you're telling him, can't imagine how he looks on that obnoxious orange court in south carolina.

"—and don't you dare bring minyard, either of 'em, you know they'll fucking kill him," you finish, and snap your phone shut and collapse into the chair next to his bed.

"fuck," you say, running a hand through your hair, and riko lets his breath fall from his shoulders.

"yeah," he whispers. "fuck."

[butshedidnotknow]

Ready To Fall

For @febuwhump 2024 Day 1: Helpless

Summary: Neil Josten returned to the Foxes in a body bag, and all of the proof Andrew has of foul play is a mysterious countdown on Neil's phone, ending the day he died. Andrew takes it badly.

---------------

One man stood alone on the edge of the rooftop, a silhouette against an already-dark sky. It was beginning to rain, gently now, but soon it would turn to a storm powerful enough to crush all of them and wash the entirety of South Carolina away with it. Despite that, the lone glow of a cigarette hung from the man’s lips, still ever so lonely. Nearly invisible against the night was the bottle of vodka that dangled from his fingers. 

“Ninety nine percent,” he muttered, staring at the parking lot down below. And then he laughed, sharp and harsh and as cutting as any of the blades that he kept pressed against his skin. “You hear that, bastard?” he shouted against the wind to no avail; it was beginning to pick up, and carried his words away with it. “Ninety fucking nine percent and I didn’t even get to kill you for it!”

Abram was dead, and they didn’t even know how. Oh, they had been given a body, and everything about it—about the familiar face, muddled and broken and bruised—had pointed to “Neil” being hit by a car in the parking lot, probably trying to escape the riots that had broken out after their game. But Andrew would never buy that, and no matter how much the other Foxes gave lip to the story, he knew that they refused to, either. It was more than a coincidence, more than an accident. The scars, the endless antagonizing of Riko and his Ravens, all of the secrets that Neil had never traded with him in their game—

Andrew dropped his cigarette off the roof and stared at it, watching its dim glow flicker out. From his pocket, he drew out a phone—old, a flip phone, far outdated, but still functional, and now without any owner for it. He gripped it tightly, almost trying to break it, and drew back his arm to throw it right next to that cigarette, now stifled by the rain.

At the last moment Andrew stopped and dropped the phone at his feet instead. There wasn’t much left of Neil: his exy gear, unused brown contact lenses, pages and pages of math work that Andrew couldn’t stand to look at, and his phone. 

He raised the bottle to his lips, took a very long drink, long enough that he was beginning to question what he was doing on the roof like this, with limbs so heavy and a pulse that threatened to leave his veins in shreds. His own scars throbbed, both old and still fresh from the riot. 

Abram is dead.

Is your spine the spine of the righteous?

If he knew who had done this, if he had any way of reaching out, Andrew would have torn them to pieces and not hesitated another second to get back at them for what they’d done to Neil. But there was nothing more to it than this: whoever it had been, they were the Ravens, or something to do with them, and with Neil gone, Andrew’s attention was wholly dedicated to Kevin. 

Andrew stared at the phone at his feet, and raised a foot to crush it beneath his boot.

Before he could, it rang once. 

Andrew stopped. He stared at it. Put his foot back on the ground. There was no one who would text Neil, not now that he was dead. The only numbers that the man had saved had belonged to the Foxes, and to whoever had sent that countdown. 

The countdown is over now, Abram, and you’re not here to see how mad I am. Do you know how much I want to kill you for that? You let them get to you first. You made me break a promise.

Not one, but two. Two promises: he’d hurt Kevin, and he’d failed to protect Neil. One of those he may be able to properly apologize for, in due time. The other—his breath was ragged and something stabbed through the side of his ribs as he thought it for the hundredth time—the other he was helpless to do anything about, no matter how hard he was to try.

Neil—Abram—Josten was dead.

And now someone was texting him.

Andrew bent down, picked up the phone on the ground, flicked it open. They still needed to cancel the phone plan. It had gotten lost in the string of things in the past week—there was so much to do that a cell phone was ranked at the bottom of the list. 

Except.

Except there was a text from a blocked number—a different one than the countdown—and when Andrew opened it, all it contained was a single word:

Wait.

And dread filled his stomach in the same way it had when Neil’s hand was yanked from him in the riot. 

He sent a reply, rash though he knew it was:

Who is this?

But there was no reply, and when he attempted to phone the mystery number back, he reached a message informing him that the number was out of service and he should hang up and try again.

Andrew buried a sob beneath a mouthful of vodka and a cigarette inhaled so quickly he felt nauseous. Who could he begin to ask for answers? A burner phone like this would be no use in trying to track down any further information, regardless of who had sent that text.

Another drink. Standing and taking tottering steps towards the door, more shakily than he would ever let himself be in front of anyone else again. 

He could not be helpless again. Not after all that he had lost.

[ninyard]

Thank you for the answers ! I really loved hearing about ur ocs 🫶🏾 🌷but by curiosity how would vic be if she fell in love with someone or from some reason in particular started playing exy and got to the foxes? How would that go ? Sorry for all the bothering and questions in advance haha, I’m just very curious.

oh thank you!! i feel silly talking about them sometimes so i'm glad you enjoy <33

if vic fell in love with someone, it would be a passionate shitshow. vic has a problem with obsession, and for a while she would do anything to please riko, because all she wanted was his validation and approval, and even still she wasn't exactly in love with him. if he asked her to kill for him, she would. if vic fell in love, she wouldn't be able to stop herself from devoting everything to the person. but she's also manipulative, and a very good actor, and her connection to them would be bordering on stalking. she'd "accidentally" bump into them in different costumes, looking like a different person, or she'd use her skills to find out everything about them, she would leave them gifts, or things in her kills that show they're for them (like the number 1 circled on a menu left next to or near a body to show that it was for riko). obsession, devotion, unhinged love and destruction because all she wants is this person. chances are once she "has" them, she'd be bored, because it's the chase and the admiring from a too-close distance that gives her a thrill. she loves to know that she's there, and the person has absolutely no idea at all.

i like to think that if vic/the foxes ever cross paths it's because she was tasked with a) finding out anything she possibly can about neil or b) killing proust. how i imagine it happening is that she's so intrigued by neil being the butcher's son that she just watches him for a while. she's in eden's when they are, she's in the crowd at games, she's pretending to be a cleaner for the foxhole court just to be close by, in the locker room, breaking into his locker just to look. she's breaking into betsy's office, or david's, or abby's, and nobody will ever know that she was ever there. she pretends to be a server at eden's just to take the glasses from their table, but only once would she ever stand in front of him and look him in the eyes and speak. maybe she has a soft smile on her face, and she tells him she's a big fan, and she loves how brave he's been after everything that's happened to him. neil obviously doesn't know how to respond, but she shakes his hand anyway, or maybe asks him to sign something, but all she sees when she looks at him is the butcher. it's admiration in a way, but there's a part of her that resents him for how everything ended with his father. she loves neil, she hates neil.

i don't think she'd ever play exy, unless it was the only way to get a job done. it's just not her scene, it's not her skillset, but if she had to she would. i could just see her getting close to the foxes in other ways - going to renee's church, or sitting in their lectures pretending to be a student, going to matt's gym, pretending to be security at one of their games. maybe she was the one who killed seth, or maybe she was just there that night. vic is more likely to hide in the shadows to watch, an unsettling presence in a room, than to directly get involved. she's learned how to master disguising herself to blend in, and if she wanted to stay hidden she would never get caught.

[inadvisablebutinevitable]

hellooo how would you rank the aftg characters personally? like in order of favorite to least favorite?

bestie I actually wrote a whole thesis essay response before realizing how unhinged it is so here is the abridged version: (note this is all for the canon versions of these characters, fanon ratings would probably be different)

Neil Josten

David Wymack

Nicky Hemmick (I know I know but it will take me 1000000 years to explain all my Nicky thoughts)

Kevin Day

Matt Boyd

Andrew Minyard (WHY IS HE THIS LOW?? Guys I don’t know I do love him I promise I would do anything for him)

Allison Reynolds

Jean Moreau (once again should be higher I love him I do)

Danielle Wilds (her and Allison could also swap places and I’d still be like “yeah that’s right” bc I love them both)

Catalina Alvarez (my fave tsc character besides Jean she means everything to me you don’t understand)

Jeremy Knox (I love him I do I just know nothing abt him)

Renee Walker (it physically hurts me to put her this low I love her so much I would die for her)

Laila Dermott

Aaron Minyard (don’t come at me pls I like him and I love fanon Aaron I just wasn’t Aaron’s number one fan in canon but I still have so much love and respect for him I swear)

Seth Gordon

I don’t really hate any of these characters I swear (except Riko he’s ranked so low he didn’t deserve a spot on the list) ((he’s a compelling villain tho)) (((Tetsuji is ranked like -100000000 I will never forgive Tetsuji ever)))

if you really want my never ending thoughts here they are under the cut:

warning for a long ass post I’m so sorry because sometimes even I can’t focus enough to read my own long posts

I have spent so long staring at this ask and trying to figure out how I can pit my children against each other but here is my best try: (this is in order of how much I enjoyed their characters personally when I was reading. The list would prob be different if I was ranking them as people and not as characters):

Neil Josten. It’s always gonna be Neil I’m sorry. Recency bias means that I’m currently thinking (and posting) abt Jean 24/7 but Neil Josten will always take the cake for me in ways I can’t even articulate. His dry humour and narrative choices always have me in stitches. He’s got so much trauma but he doesn’t want to do anything about it but push it down until he meets people he cares about and they found family him into actually healing. He cares so deeply and loves in such a subtle but incredibly strong way. I don’t know how to even express this without saying that the reason I can’t put aftg down every time I pick it up is because of Neil. He tells the story in a way that makes me want to know everything about literally every scene. It’s all Nora ofc but the personality between the lines is how I define “Neil” and I will never not love it. You’ve got me going and now I’m not gonna stop. I can’t even apologize for the length bc I will never apologize for yapping about Neil Josten I say that shit with my FULL CHEST

David Wymack. Do I even have to explain myself here? Those are his fucking KIDS and he would do ANYTHING for them while being a SASSY LITTLE SHIT about it the whole time plus he’s a DILF I would kill and die for him.

Nicky Hemmick don't shoot me pls LOOK do I think what he did to Neil in Edens was at all ok? Absolutely not. When I first read tfc I was HARDCORE hating on Nicky and then trk and tkm made him one of my favourite characters. I don’t think he’s perfect but I love the way he loves. It isn’t hard for him, none of the monsters had to prove themselves to Nicky, or even try to be a decent friend for Nicky to automatically decide that these were his people and that he cares about them. When we meet him Aaron is a homophobic dick to him and Andrew literally pulls a knife on him and yet we immediately find out that he willingly dropped everything and moved an ocean away from his home and his boyfriend to raise them both in the US and not ONCE does he act like he seriously regrets it. Me? I would be holding that shit over their heads every time they act disrespectful but for Nicky loving them despite the shit they put him through is not even a question. It’s not even just the twins too. That one scene where Neil asks “are we? Friends?” And Nicky is SO SHOCKED that Neil didn’t know and goes “oh kiddo of course!!” is my Roman Empire. Plus he’s hilarious obviously.

Kevin Day guys I love him ok, the first two books he compelled me but TKM he POPPED OFF. “I’ve never been skiiing” BANGER “I’m gonna be the deadliest piece on the board” GOOSEBUMPS, “My father comes to all my games” HAD ME IN TEARS. Don’t even get me STARTED on that sexy ass racquet hand switch at championships I’m going to combust. I love that he’s literally obsessed with exy and has the most complicated relationships with the mc’s of every book and yet steals the show every time. Kevin Day I love you.

Matt Boyd. I love him because he would love me for putting Neil first and kill me for not putting Dan before him. He loves his girlfriend and his homies and his sport and cars in that order. He’s a golden retriever who saw a team full of scary-ass wolves and still tries to be friends with them. He wasn’t a part of the “clique” that Neil was in but he did not let that affect his perception or love for Neil in any way. He’s been to hell and came out with just as much love in his heart as he did when he came in. He told Neil that he didn’t know if Andrew would be good for him but then he saw that Andrew fought Kevin for him and decided that he approved bc all that mattered to him was that Neil had someone who would defend him the way Matt would. Then he immediately becomes the #1 wingman right before the shower scene bc he would rather die than cockblock his homie. I love him so much

Andrew Minyard. Like Nicky, I was absolutely a HATER in book one and then he became one of my faves. I like that he’s brave and determined, standing despite everything when the world tried to put him down, but not without his flaws. I really appreciate that Andrew isn’t perfect, he struggles, he’s violent when it’s necessary and sometimes when it’s not. I love how he was always willing to protect Neil, despite everything in him telling him that Neil couldn’t be trusted. He’s a flawed man, but at his core, a good one.

Allison Reynolds is that girl. She reminds me of Andrew (both of them would kill me for saying that) because she takes no shit and gives no fucks. She’s who 16 year old me wanted to be when I grew up. She goes through every emotion in these books and comes out full of righteous anger and uses that to kick the raven’s ASSES and I’m so here for that

Jean Moreau. It’s weird to me that he’s so low because I love him he’s my special boy. I thought that he was interesting in TRK but Riko was a more compelling villain to me. Then ofc we learn that he was never meant to be the villain and he was ranked just below Kevin for me because I just wanted him to be happy. Then tsc happened and he became my hyper fixation. He has a VERY similar sense of humor as Neil except for Neil his jokes were directed at abnormal behaviour, and for Jean he just gets so appalled at the most normal things. I digress about his humor I love Jean and if u want to know why just read literally any of my posts

Danielle Wilds is my GIRL. Her story compels me so much and I really wish we got more backstory for her (obvs we got plenty considering the cast of characters is so huge but still… I want more). She loves her team so much despite everything and she works so hard to keep them together I wanna give her a hug and a kiss. (That scene in TKM right after Andrew breaks Riko’s arm Dan was the FIRST one to find Neil and she was so concerned about him she cares about him so much STOP they’re FAMILY I LOVE THEM)

Catalina Alvarez was my favourite character in tsc (aside from Jean) because I love her so much. @theresalwaysafiresomewhere said that cat reminds her of me and it was still to this day the best compliment I’ve ever received. I cannot name a single thing abt cat I don’t like so I’m just gonna keep going.

Jeremy Knox is only this low bc I still know nothing about this man. Reading his pov and seeing him thru Jean’s eyes was helpful in securing him a spot in my list of faves tho, I want to know everything about him please Nora please

Renee Walker also should not be this low it physically hurts me to put her here but like most other characters in this half of the list, she didn’t compel me as much until tkm. Just a personal thing I guess. I do love her though and I wish she got more time with Jean. It still bothers me that she loved Jean but was the bigger person about it and knew that they weren’t at the right place in their lives, and yet we don’t get to see how making this decision affects her. I think she deserves to be loved more. I hope she gets a happy ending the same way Jean does.

Laila Dermott I love her I just don’t really know enough abt her

Aaron Minyard I like him I promise I do he’s got some of the best one-liners! He killed drake did all that in college with an gf and all the power to him but really I think that fanon aaron just appealed to me way more. Canon Aaron just annoyed me because— gunshots actually you know what maybe it’s once again because unreliable narrator Neil hated him and Neil’s my fave so I had to be a hater too 😔

Seth. I know some fans love him and I respect that but I just… idk I don’t see the appeal. Fanon Seth is great tho I’m a fan.

Canon Thea is somewhere on this list near Laila again bc I love her but I don’t know enough about her to be like “yeah she’s my fave”. The version of Thea I created in my head based on the crumbs the books and the ec gave us, on the other hand… she’d probably be somewhere up there with Kevin

[ifitmeanslosingyouthenno]

one way or another (i'm gonna get ya)

day 9 whumptober prompt: obsession | bruises | broken window

day 10 whumptober prompt: blow to the head | passing out from the pain

it was supposed to be handled by the feds

it was supposed to stop at pictures that made him stop visiting his regular coffee shops with andrew and threatening emails that made him close the account and phone calls in the middle of the night that made him switch phones again and again and again

it was supposed to stop before he had to move apartments because he didn't feel safe in his home

it was supposed to be over

browning was supposed to have taken care of his stalker

just a very passionate raven fan who thought it was neil's fault that it all fell apart and rikos perfect court went to shit and that riko killed himself

neil drew the line when the man touched andrew to get him out of the way to get to neil, the first time he actually approached him

they could do whatever they wanted with him, but he would not get away with touching andrew

so he called the feds

he called browning

they had the man in custody by the next day

browning said he wasn't getting away

so he promises andrew that he can finally be left home alone again, that no, he can stay a night by himself after months of not being let out of andrew’s sight so andrew can go have an actual in person dinner with betsy (thats really going to be a session but that neil knows andrew needs)

he's jittery, he's paranoid and he's scared most of the night but he settles on the bed in the guest room (because he cant make himself lie alone in their bed in the main room) and makes himself pay every ounce of his focus on the documentary he put on

he's fine

his stalker is in custody

the feds took care of it

he has his phone with him

he has andrew on speed dial

betsy's new place is only 15 minutes away

its okay

hes okay

he doesn't notice when he ends up falling asleep until he's woken up by the sound of glass shattering

the tv is playing a slideshow of pictures, the documentary he put on long since over

there's the sound of glass crunching outside and neil's heart starts jackrabbiting immediately

maybe its andrew, maybe he forgot his keys, maybe he dropped a glass of water

he reaches for his phone, sees its 2:47 am, sees andrews text saying hes on his way timed 2:39

8 minutes is enough time for andrew to get here with the speed he drives and how empty the streets are at this time

he relaxes at that, tells himself to take a deep breath

its okay

hes okay

it's just andrew

he turns the tv off and heads outside, meaning to look for andrew and figure out what he broke

the hallway light is off, but the kitchen's isn't

"drew? you okay?"

the lack of response should have been a clue, should have made him stop, should have told him that something was wrong

andrew seeks him out just as much as neil seeks andrew out

he would have replied

but he doesn't get an answer

instead as he walks into the kitchen he gets tackled to the floor and the wind gets pushed out of him

for a moment all he can do is panic, in his half asleep state all he can feel is fear

its fear that clouds his eyes as the figure on top of him closes his hands around his throat in a tight grip that completely blocks off his airway and is sure to bruise

its fear that clouds his eyes as the figure on top of him presses his knee to his belly in a way that makes moving excruciating

its fear that belatedly makes him realize he recognizes the man on top of him

its fear that delays his response

he's seeing spots by the time he's able to get his hands and arms and legs to move and he's able to hit the man in the balls strong enough to make him falter and the push on his elbow makes sure he dislodges his dirty hands from neils throat

he tries so fucking hard to get his breathing back under control, but god he cant fucking breathe, his lungs feel like they're collapsing and his vision is too foggy and he's just barely able to get up to his knees before he's tackled again

he tries to recover now that he recognizes the threat, god he's trying so fucking hard, but a punch to his temple leaves him dazed, almost paralyzed with pain as

hes on his side, trying so hard to at lease get into a crawl, and he's able to move a few meters forward before the man is kicking him right in his already pained ribs

over and over and over again

his chest is on fire his abdomen is on fire and it takes everything for him to try to curl up to protect his head but its too late

a kick right to his nose sends his sprawling on his back as he feels blood in his mouth

he's not sure it wasn't there before anyway

breathing feels like a chore

there's a hand gripping his hair and pulling him a few inches off the ground harshly

somewhere, he's sure he can hear his cats, no, their cats yowling and crying

he just hopes they aren't hurt because of him

he can feel bruises forming on his face and around his surely broken ribs already

then there's a face in front of his, snarling and ugly

"you know i tried to keep my distance, i tried to be civil and rational, but then you had to get the feds involved? you stupid piece of fucking trash"

his words are accentuated by his head hitting the floor harshly and for a second all he can hear is the ringing in his head

three hits in about as many minutes

he knows enough, has been through enough to know thats bad

the one time he got hit in the head while on the run he had his mother to get him out

now all he can hope for is that andrew gets here quick

no no no, but that would put andrew in danger too

he has to- he has to figure out how to get out of this himself-

"i wanted you to suffer, i wanted you to feel what he did, i wanted you to lose everyone and everything and then your sanity.

the man is forcing his head to the ground and neil grunts with the pressure growing and growing and-

he hears the rattle of a gun, feels it against his temple

god let just andrew and their cats be safe

please let andrew and the cats be safe-

please let andrew and the cats be safe-

"but maybe a bullet to the head is enough, maybe you dying the same way he did is enough"

he knows he would plead if he had the air and the mental capacity to do so

the pressure in his head is too much, it's unlike anything he's felt before and

all he can manage is faint whining

please let andrew and the cats be safe

the safety is clicked off

"just remember this is all your fault bastard"

please let andrew and the cats be safe-

there's a bang-

and then there's nothing

woop sorry neil

dw he's alive... most likely anyway ;)

sorry im a couple of days late ajdjdk I've been crazy busy with a university event and hadn't had time to write these

so yeah i joined up these two bc anyway i had no idea how to work with prompt 10 by itself without seeming repetitive

but yeah i hope to catch up between today and tomorrow :)

[traumatizedpomelo]

parallels in the teams

In reality, there are only three, because, well. Kevin Day went from number two in black to number two in orange.

1 - oh, the captains. Captain Wilds and Captain Moriyama.

Dan takes control of the team with hard-earned authority and the pragmatism of someone who went through the real world the hard way, someone who used to dance for a living. She didn't care for her aunt, so she made a family from her stage sisters and then the two other girls on the Foxes. She loses semifinals, and then claims her captainship from the coach of a broken team full of broken people.

Riko was given everything since birth: power, playthings, a captaincy - everything but the attention from his father he so desperately craved. Even his brother would have done, but Riko is the second son, and so he only meets Ichirou when he's caused too much trouble for the main branch to ignore. One last victory for the King. He leaves the meeting in a bodybag, a single bullet through his skull.

To both of them, exy matters more than nearly anything else in the world - for Dan, almost more than a bigger life. For Riko, almost more than being acknowledged by his family. But see - Dan knows where to stop. Riko's entire life, he's been unlimited in his freedom, whereas Dan's life can be defined as a series of limitations.

And then Riko dies, because of his lack of restraint. And Dan - Hennessy - one of the only female captains in NCAA exy - wins.

3 - the defenders of their castles. Knights, in their own right. I'm speaking, of course, of Jean Moreau and Andrew Minyard.

Andrew was, since birth, an unwanted child. His own mother left him to rot in the foster system while she took Aaron back - perhaps his was the first birth certificate in the drawer, perhaps something in her knew Andrew would be unmanageable. (The thing is, we don't know if he would have been unmanageable. The abuse and the pills and everything else killed him, you see). So when he's given a family, he latches onto it with a burning ferocity and drags them along with him. Everyone assumes they have to bully him into things, but the heartbreaking fact is - they don't. Neil knows this firsthand. But ask him anything nicely, and he will almost always say yes if it's not inconvenient. Such a sad habit of a man who always begged no growing up.

We know next to nothing about Jean. We know he is French, we know he grew up in Marseilles. We know he had a family, once, and he was heartbroken and furious when they sold him to the Moriyamas. When he comes out of the darkness, so many years later, he is almost unrecognizable. A broken spirit, a broken man. But he is still Jean Moreau. He is still the boy who taught Kevin French against Riko's wishes, he is still the boy who called Renee and asked for her help. But those years in the Nest also changed him, perhaps irreversibly. And he is too cowed to say no, ever, so he always says yes. Until Renee rescues him from Castle Evermore and takes him to the Trojans. Then he fights with a ferocity, something ingrained in him. And once again, he is promptly ignored.

Say yes, say yes, and usually they do. Both men unable to stop something, a trap set up by men more powerful than them. Drake. Riko. Proust. Every monster under Andrew's bed and Raven outside Jean's room - shadows that they could never quite shake. But then they're free. And neither of them knows quite what to do at first. So Jean self-destructs. But Andrew is determined to take everyone else out with him. They both end up living with boys who won't let them.

Jean and Andrew both make it out. And this is important.

4 - the backliners. Matt Boyd, and, however sickeningly, Nathaniel Wesninski.

Matt has tried so hard his entire life. He cares so much about everything, getting into drugs and drinking for his father, getting better for his mother. He cares enough to let Andrew dose him with speedball and "purge" him the way he did to Aaron. He fights for his teammates, for his captain, for the skittish new striker who's rooming with him. He defends his team - that's who he is. He is a protector, and he takes his role seriously. Remember when he offered to help Neil if Kevin became a problem?

Nathaniel Wesninski does not care. Now, underneath his skin is Neil Josten, starting striker, but he does not care about the Ravens. Quite the opposite. He fumbles shots on purpose, gets into fights with his teammates, mocks his captain. Anything to make the Ravens lose. He was put on the home half of court to protect Castle Evermore, but instead he lets in as many enemies as possible, even if they're only strikers on his team. He digs his heels in every step of the way, fighting Riko the entire time. "Make me," he says, and smiles when he knows Tetsuji will beat him. Just as long as he can make them lose.

Defenders, but only one does his job. Matt is all heart, standing up for everyone, even the so called Monsters. But Nathaniel - Nathaniel would verbally eviscerate Riko on TV. That is, if he could speak.

And then Nathaniel speaks. And he leaves the Nest. The same way Matt found it in himself to fight off speedball, the way he leaves the bathroom he'd been locked in. Once.

[afurtivecake]

Just throwing my two cents in the ring, but I feel like it's unrealistic to say Andrew wouldn't get angry. He went into a blind rage and choked Kevin just for not sharing information to help find Neil. He also went into a blind rage and choked Allison for slapping Aaron. And Andrew chose Neil over Aaron. I can't see Andrew not immediately going into a blind rage/on the war path if Kevin tries to do some serious shit to Neil.

Andrews rage and violence is rarely controlled when Neil is involved. I mean, didn't he pull a knife on Kevin for going against Neil when Neil said he wanted to go on vacation or whatever 😭

Yeah, Andrew is definitely pretty liberal with the violence when one of his people get hurt. He pulls a knife on Kevin more than once, I think. There was also that time Kevin got mad at him for agreeing to play seriously so easily when Wymack asked him to and threw him into some lockers. I think Andrew even drew blood that time. Yeah, Andrew definitely thinks he can take Kevin in a fight no problem. I guess it depends on if Kevin lands a hit on Neil and if Andrew perceives Neil as being in genuine danger from Kevin. Before with Aaron and Kevin, he retaliated whenever they were hurt and it didn't matter why they got hit or whether they really needed him to step in. But Andrew at the end of the series isn't protecting Neil because he has to; he's protecting Neil when Neil needs him. I think if he doesn't think that Kevin poses an actual threat to Neil, he wouldn't snap so quickly. It's not as if Kevin and Neil fighting is unusual, nor is actual fighting between the Foxes uncommon. Though he may also be on edge after the finals match; I mean, he did just break the arm of the last guy who tried to kill his boyfriend, so there is that.

I think in the situation I'm imagining, Kevin is fighting and lashing out at Neil in a state of loss. It's more than just being angry with Neil for being insensitive; it's where every feeling is being channeled into a singular, pain-fuelled rage. It's that feeling of wanting to tear something or someone apart because that will somehow make the awful feeling stop. It's what Andrew would have felt when he realized that Neil was gone. When it was Andrew, it took several people to pull him off Kevin. And the thing with Kevin is that not only is he at least a foot taller than Andrew and taller than most of their teammates, the grief he's feeling is for someone who's been a brother-best friend-partner-owner-everything to him for the past decade. Like Riko was the first person he saw every morning, the first person whose reaction he looked for, first person he would have thought of whenever anything happened around them, the person he knew best - and now he's gone. Not like, "worried that he might have gone to his death and it would be partly my fault for not realizing sooner," but like, he is GONE. For good. The Foxes have never seen him truly angry or violent before. They mostly don't take his usual anger very seriously. I think Kevin's fury would be terrible and unexpected enough to level out the playing field between him and Andrew, and perhaps even tip it in his favour.

[wonkyjaw]

Some TSC things I can’t stop thinking about that I haven’t seen mentioned yet:

Jean (and likely Riko) had no idea the Foxes knew as much as they did… and Jean already thought the Foxes were crazy for keeping Kevin and Neil.

Dealing with Neil over Christmas Break was a “salve for Jean’s sanity” despite how hard Neil made things for them by fighting back and despite having “a longer leash” than Kevin was ever afforded. Despite Zane’s reaction to Neil’s reappearance.

The fact that Kevin knew just from Jean's reaction to him mentioning Neil didn't sign the Raven contract that he and Riko had waterboarded Neil. Like… the implications of that????

Subpoint: Does Neil even realize that’s what happened or has he fully blocked it out??

I can’t tell if I’m just getting older or if Jeremy and Jean’s view of Wymack makes him that much more… compelling.

Jeremy’s POV during the Foxes v Trojans game. The way the Foxes picked Trojans back up so casually endearing them to Jeremy. Just that when they weren’t fighting for their lives, Foxes had time to spare energy on just being kind in a way no one had cared to see before but it’s important to Jeremy. Ugh.

Jeremy used the phrase “duty-bound” more than once to describe things he didn’t want to necessarily do. What the fuck is up with that?

Also, sir, why is your rich white ass hiding from cops. I would like the tea, please.

Renee’s rediscovered simple delights being “butterflies, fresh baked bread, the crunch of leaves on an autumn morning.” And then Jean taking that idea up and consistently listing his own simple delights as he discovered them (it might kill me yet).

“Her love was so tender it looked like grief” (I am going feral what the fuck)

Bee getting Jean to talk to her by pretending to know less than nothing about Exy and after Jean goes off about it she explains she did it because she was curious if he cared enough to explain it to her. That she wasn’t sure if they were at the court for comfort or contrition and the fact that she specifically used the word contrition…

Also the fact that she likely brought up with the goals look like because everyone seems to be under the impression that the goal has a net for some reason? I’ve read so much fanfic, the goal always gets described a hundred different ways, part of me feels like this was Nora’s way of saying “no you’re wrong!” And I laughed really hard when I read it.

Also also, I would kill to know what all Bee knows.

After the Raven game Jean made a list of every time Kevin and Neil got bullied by the Raven backliners and by the end had four full pages of scathing remarks about it. I’m not sure what to read into that, but it has not left my mind since I read it.

All of the background noise when Renee calls Jean and tells him not to watch the news. Glass breaking and yelling, a scene I’ve always wanted was Neil telling (or not) the rest of the Foxes about Riki’s death. So these little insights are so tantalizing. Wait, dear god, is it in the EC?

Jeremy’s conversation with his sister??? How a new scandal was overdue because he should end the way he started??? Neil didn’t give a shit about the Trojans and Jeremy refuses to think about it so now I’m desperate to know what the fuck that meant. Along with the comment about a fall banquet tearing his family apart????

The fact that every time Jean refers to Neil/Kevin/Andrew/Nicky’s room in Fox Tower it is always always just Neil’s room. It’s so funny to me.

Renee gave Jean her cross 😭

Wymack flew with Jean to California only to fly directly back to South Carolina. Jean referred to Wymack as unreal and I so fully agree.

Jeremy’s yo-yo.

The random “fan” calling Jean “Gene Moore” making me realize that there’s a large amount of people who would not know how to pronounce his name and how insufferable that’s going to end up being when he’s forced to handle the media and public more often.

Jean just casually grabbing Jeremy by the chin… more than once.

“You are not them.” Vs. “I won’t be like them. I won’t let you let me be.”

“I’m fine.” Vs. “Accidents happen in scrimmages.”

“Don’t I at least deserve the chance to not be a villain in your story?”

Jean breaking a glass when Cat mentions Laila was going to get him a sex toy. Jeremy making it to the kitchen in record time.

“You are Jean Moreau. Your place is here with me, with us. I’m your captain. You’re my partner.” Vs. “You’re Neil Josten. You’re starting striker for the Palmetto State Foxes. Your father is dead. You are safe.”