#and then i m just. done. for the whole day. which is why i prefer having them at night actually

[sovaharbor]

see the annoying part about having a panic attack is i have one and then my day is ruined and i simply continue to anticipate having Another one

[royalsunshinehotel]

may i request nsfw alphabet with napoleon usher?

Napoleon 'Leo' Usher (NSFW Alphabet, 18+)

A/N: I’m writing this after watching Episode Four with @hecuba-of-troy. It’s such a slay, and I love Rahul Kohli so much. This being said, Leo is the worst and I hate him, and I want him. Please enjoy this NSFW alphabet for the worst character ever. 

A = Aftercare (what they’re like after sex) It’s minimal, if not nonexistent. Leo, after coming in to the Usher family at age 18, was certified at the ‘fuck-and-run’ 

B = Body part (their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)

I don't think he likes to look close enough at his partners to have a favorite body part. For him, he likes his hands and his hair

C = Cum (anything to do with cum, basically) He hasn’t got a preference beyond: as much as possible, and everywhere. Cleaning up after is usually a multi-step process. 

D = Dirty secret (pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs) There was definitely a time in his life when he had a spreadsheet of everyone he’d done sexual activities with. Yes, it is now deleted because he’s become more confident in himself in his thirties. Is it always warranted? Who’s to say. Is the spreadsheet now deleted? Yeah, and he’ll deny it ever existed. 

E = Experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they’re doing?) Oh he’s a certified slut. He knows what he needs to do to ‘maintain his reputation’, and he’s probably going to do it. 

F = Favorite position (this goes without saying) He’s a big fan of his partners either being on top, or being on all fours. He’s pretty tall, so whatever’s best for his upper back that day is usually what makes the choice. 

G = Goofy (are they more serious in the moment? are they humorous? etc.) I think he tries to keep it minimal, because goofiness can lead to Intimacy and he can't have that. If he cracks a joke, you’ll laugh and then what !!! chaos (See I) 

H = Hair (how well groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes? etc.) I seriously think it matches his fuck ass haircut. Like short on the sides long on the middle. I don’t know hair growth patterns down there, but you get the idea. 

I = Intimacy (how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect) I feel like he’s capable of it, but he’ll have to dump you immediately after. It’s something he actively has to tamp down in the name of getting off. 

J = Jack off (masturbation headcanon) A whole lot. 3x daily I fear. 

K = Kink (one or more of their kinks) There's no way he’s having a fucking ass stupid ass haircut like that if you’re not the one pulling on it. Fucking fuck ass shaved sides fuckboy. Like I don’t know what that style is called, but it’s right there next to ‘fuck ass bob’. 

Next after that, I think he’s really into lite bondage. Just being tied up and used by you, which you’re happy to do. 

L = Location (favorite places to do the do) Typically at home, but if it’s been a to of family drama, he’ll fuck you in his car on the way to/from the family event. Next after that, the two of you get nasty in the shower, and then the bedroom. 

M = Motivation (what turns them on, gets them going) A gust of air? Typically I feel like Leo gets a little bit stuck in his own head, typically in a negative train of thought. That usually does it, but he’ll never let it on. He’ll literally use you to feel Anything, but not That much. Sorry!! He needs therapy!!

N = No (something they wouldn’t do, turn offs) I feel like choking/ anything to do with pain really, it’s off the table. If there’s one thing about Leo, he would never hurt you on purpose. 

O = Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.) Receiving. I’m not gonna say any more than that. 

P = Pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.) It depends on the mood honestly, fast and rough if he’s had a hard time with his family, but it’s slow and sensual and lazy most other times. 

Q = Quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.) IDK why I feel this way, but I don’t think Leo is very into quickies, just because he doesn’t strike me as a man who is good at multitasking. Like if a partner were to initiate sex, it would suddenly be sex-time for sex havers. Whatever he was doing before, would have to be put on hold. 

R = Risk (are they game to experiment? do they take risks? etc.) Oh he’s all about it, anything to feel something. I see a lot of fucking on his balcony, perhaps in the bathroom at a cool restaurant. 

S = Stamina (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?) I think he’s been blessed with a whole lot of stamina, almost alarmingly so. Just picture his partner, exhausted, and Leo just cheesing like :D need a break? 

T = Toys (do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themselves?) I think he’s got a substantial collection, because he’s a lazy lover and if he can’t pawn the work off on his partner, he’ll pawn it off on a toy. 

U = Unfair (how much they like to tease) I think it’s up to his partners to tease. Leo is a bit of a glutton, so I can’t see him knowing how to tease, or tease well. 

V = Volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.) I know this man’s loud as hell. In canon, he’s a slut who hooks up with his instagram followers. I truly believe he doesn’t care who hears ever, and he’s probably smug and selfish, regardless of his minimal effort. 

W = Wild card (a random headcanon for the character) I feel like Leo has his hair like that by mistake. It looks kind of like a mistake, like he went on a bender, and woke up with his hair like that. This being the case, he’s big into wearing hats in the winter, because the sides of his head like that.  

X = X-ray (let’s see what’s going on under those clothes) He’s a stallion, in his fucking prime. Thank you, god bless. 

Y = Yearning (how high is their sex drive?) As we see on the show, it’s pretty darn high. The two of you are definitely NOT monogamous because I’m betting this man drowns his low self-esteem with a high sex drive. He picks up anything that moves and has sex with it. He’s very much the type to say “i don’t know” when you ask about people in his apartment. 

Z = Zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards) 

I think regardless of him being on his “best behavior” he knocks out almost immediately after. He’s very much the type to just roll over and fall asleep, for better or worse.

[ghostradiodylan]

It's karaoke night. What songs do you think each of the hacketteers would sing?

I love this ask and I spent entirely too long thinking about it! Thank you!

Nick: “American Girl” - Tom Petty and the Heartbreakers. He’ll dedicate this one to Abi and play a whole lot of clumsy but enthusiastic air guitar during the instrumental breaks. He’ll also do really on-the-nose inside joke choices like “Werewolves of London” by Warren Zevon (he'll change 'London' to 'Melbourne' because he's really lame) or “Once Bitten, Twice Shy” by Great White.

Emma: “Style” - Taylor Swift. She just reads as a Taylor girlie to me and this one’s a classic. She could do "We Are Never Getting Back Together" but Jacob might cry. So, "Style" it is. Not too tough in range and it doesn’t require her to do the cringey rap-talking part she’d have to do if she picked “Shake It Off” (although that one would also be fun and maybe if Abi gets drunk enough she’ll join Emma onstage and do that part for her).

Jacob: he wants to pick “Don’t Stop Believin’” by Journey but it has been banned because basic bitches like him just keep singing it. If he’s still moping about Emma, he might choose “Somebody to Love” by Queen. If someone else gets to it first, then it’s The Killers' “Mr. Brightside” all the way until the bar bans that one too.

Kaitlyn: she almost always picks a song you can scream-sing to. She has some rage to get out, okay? Her go-to is either "I Love Rock 'n' Roll" by Joan Jett or "You Oughta Know" by Alanis Morissette. If you get enough alcohol in her for her to get in her feelings though, she might do Bonnie Tyler's "Total Eclipse of the Heart," as a treat.

Laura: "Dog Days are Over" - Florence + The Machine. Is that another werewolf joke? Yes, yes it is. She can't help being overjoyed to say goodbye to the (meat)dog days. She'd probably also absolutely crush "Help I'm Alive" by Metric.

Max: I will never recover from the post that said Max and Dylan would know every step from the JustDance version of “Rasputin” by Boney M (which I think is completely correct) so I’m picking that one for Max. However, if he gets a second song or he’s feeling extremely sentimental, he might do the Michael Bublé version of “L.O.V.E.” for Laura.

Abi: I think Abi's actual musical listening tastes might be a little moodier than this, but for karaoke she wants it light and easy, and it doesn't get much lighter or easier than ABBA. "Dancing Queen" or "Mamma Mia." She'd really like it if Emma would come sing backup for her so she doesn't have to go up by herself.

Dylan: He never does the same song twice; he wants everyone to be surprised every time. He's done Lady Gaga's "Poker Face. He's done "I Write Sins Not Tragedies" by Panic! At the Disco." He's done Katy Perry's "Teenage Dream." Tonight, it's "Still Into You" by Paramore.

Ryan: He can't believe he got talked into this. Ryan hates attention and doesn't really love the sound of his own voice. He would prefer to sit quietly and watch everyone else perform. Beer won't be enough, Ryan will have to drink an entire pitcher of LITs to be drunk enough to sing. Then he will sing "Love You Madly" by CAKE and absolutely slay. Dylan will be facedown on their table pretending to have fainted when he gets back.

Bonus: Duets!

Laura and Max have perfected their version of “Don’t Go Breaking My Heart” by Elton John and Kiki Dee. You should really see it. There’s choreo and everything.

Jacob and Kaitlyn will sing "I Believe in A Thing Called Love" by The Darkness. Nobody knows why. Neither of them has the upper range to pull it off and they know it. It's awful. They're just screeching. Ryan has to go outside until they're finished. His nerves can't take it. They have fun though.

Dylan would really like Ryan to duet with him on Peter Bjorn and John's "Young Folks," he'll even do the girl parts and the whistling! But Ryan's one and done at karaoke, and even that is asking a lot. Instead, Dylan and Nick duet The Proclaimers' "I'm Gonna Be (500 Miles)" in absurd and potentially offensive Scottish accents.

Emma and Abi end up duetting half the time when they're supposed to be doing their own songs anyway, especially when it's Abi's turn! Somehow Emma just ends up there too. But they do "Girls Just Wanna Have Fun" by Cyndi Lauper together with some frequency and they're great at it.

Bonus 2: Group Number!

You already know what it is. You know what's coming. You get it stuck in your head every time you play the damn game (don't you? I know it's not just me.) How could they not all sing Kelly Clarkson's "Stronger (What Doesn't Kill You)" together? Of course they do.

[ramu-ego]

Ramu you deserve to treat yourself so please tell me about Ego as a sub, it can be headcanons it can be a scenario, it can be detailed or sloppy, all I want from you is some delicious desperate Ego, please and thank

(nsfw) THE EGOIST SUBBING :: xfemdom!Reader

fittsy you can't just do this to me y'know I can't control myself around this man and I'm not scrambling to do this in half an hour or anything nope not me ♡ -askbox open cw: fem!Reader, dom!Reader, bdsm dynamics, sexual themes, unedited word count: sloppy headcanons character(s): Jinpachi Ego

DNI :: minors, blank blogs + m!Reader blogs

pillow princess 🤝 power bottom

truly a master switch this man is a glutton that leans hard both ways with whatever benefits him the most

very little preference to dom or sub unless he's tired (which is like 90% of the time) a tired Ego is a sub Ego

don't let that fool you though he's as intense of a sub as he is a dom because if you're going to do something then do it to the extreme

obviously

this man is an obnoxious, in your face, whiny, needy, greedy and pushy sub that is a glutton for his own pleasure and mostly his alone

punishment is alright in small doses but not what he gave up control for

doesn't like to be uncomfortable and will let you know and tells you to fix it

melts for overstimulation as a control tactic

wants to loose his mind and be putty in your hands because if he's too fucked out to analyze anything then that means your doing an A+ job

does not like complicated positions so keep that in mind

loves body worship and he sees no reason why his domme shouldn't be worshipping like a spoiled little brat that he intends to be

he's a brat but just....roll with it

loves to be spoiled with just your body and attention

toys are alright but nothing compares to the nice human touch

comes undone in the prettiest way to get sucked off and played with in his office chair

finger him while you give him kitten licks on just the tip of his cock and watch a man crumble before your eyes until he's huffing and demanding he gets to cum

cums with his whole body and soul too ♡

isn't particularly loud but the gasps and groans are as much fun as the toe curling expression etched on his face when you finally give him what he demanded and a little more

overstim overstim overstim!

don't stop even if he's done because you know his body better so of course he's got another one in there for you ♡

50/50 about getting pegged

if it's a lazy position he's more into it but sometimes you get lucky and he wants to ride you and don't ever pass that up

loves to be an overstimulated bottom when you ride him and use him like your own personal toy

touch his chest it's sensitive but he refuses to admit it

it benefits him if you cum so...he'll never argue how you want to use him because if you're cumming around him then he gets the bonus of how tight you are around him

gets ahead of himself sometimes and doesn't listen unless you pin him down and remind him who's in charge

again that power bottom manners rears its ugly heads sometimes because at the end of the day he's greedy for his own pleasure above all else

[enchantedchocolatebars]

I remember that it's uncomfortable for you to write Belos/Camilla, and you prefer to write Beardo Phillip/Camilla, but there are no any real ship in this idea, so it should be fine. The whole idea is the misunderstanding.

So, Belos Redemption AU, Belos lives in Noseda's house with the HexSquad, he found out that his views are outdated, the children are more or less cool with such a company

Fic - Philip doesn't quite understand why Luz is acting so strangely. He just tried to help Camila in any way he could, because the poor woman was definitely not ready that so many guests would live in her house. He tried to be polite, asking different questions and being interested in different topics. But he doesn't quite understand what flirting is and why Luz thinks he did it with her mom.

Meanwhile, Luz believes that Belos wants to date her mom and she can't let that happen

The M/il/f-understanding

Philip was unable to comprehend why Luz was acting so aggressively towards him lately.

I mean, he had some idea as to why.

She was the only one in her friend group who was still suspicious about him.

Plus, there was the Day of Unity, the fight between him and her friends on Halloween, and so on.

But Philip took note of something.

He noticed Luz's aggression start to really rise whenever he was around her mother, which greatly confused him.

Since Camila had so many unexpected guests living with her now, he was trying to help her as best he could.

The two shared some intriguing conversations while cooking meals for the children and cleaning together.

Philip would always ask Camila questions about the modern world, and she was always happy to answer and explain them.

This caused Luz to accuse him of flirting with her mother one day, but he had no idea what that meant.

...

"YOU CAN'T DATE MY MOM!" Luz shouts, angrily rushing into the room that Philip was currently in by himself.

She grit her teeth. "YOU'RE NOT ALLOWED TO!"

"Date?" Philip questioned, a slight frown on his face at her tone.

"Why would I want to do that?"

"Because," Luz began with a growl, lowering her brows at him. "You've been flirting with her all week!" She argued.

"Just the other day, I heard you telling her how good she looked in her apron in the kitchen. You were flirting with her!"

"I was simply expressing a polite compliment," Philip would respond calmly.

He was a gentleman, after all.

"Oh, yeah?" Luz said, not believing him in the slightest.

He was a big fat liar in her eyes.

"Then explain why you were sitting on the couch watching TV with her on Tuesday. You were trying to find the right moment to kiss her, weren't you?"

He was probably attempting to put the moves on Camila while a romantic movie was playing, Luz thought.

Philip sighed at the assumption. "Your mother was showing me a documentary on horses. She believed that it would be of great interest to me."

And it was.

Luz continued to glare him down.

She had one more question to ask that would expose his true intentions.

"What about the flowers you got her?" She asked in a demanding tone, directing her finger towards the glass vase that was displayed on the hutch.

Resting inside it was a bouquet of beautiful marigolds.

"Well?" Luz tapped her foot, awaiting an answer.

"She requested them," Philip told her, a roll of his eyes.

"She mentioned that those were the flowers she adored the most and would look stunning in the house, so she asked me to purchase them using her card."

"...Oh," Luz went, feeling slightly embarrassed that she was wrong.

Philip chuckled. "You really are quite noisy, aren't you, Luzura."

"That's not my name," Luz grumbled. "And whatever, just don't try anything romantic or flirty with my mom. Got it?"

"Understood. Though..." He had a playful look in his eyes, a slight smirk spreading on his chapped lips.

"I could see myself attempting to pursue her during the Deadwardian Era," he hummed.

His young, bearded self would have done everything in his power to make Camila his wife.

If Luz had a drink in her hand, she'd spit it out. "Wait, WHAT?!"

[adhd-merlin]

merlin's personality type (mbti)

Post inspired by my own poll, which was in turn sort of inspired by a post calling Gwaine and Merlin "extrovert bisexuals". This baffled me at the time because, to me, Merlin was obviously an introvert. But when I stopped to think about it, it wasn't actually all that obvious. 

As I mentioned previously in my own tags, I think you could make a decent argument for either Extrovert Merlin or Introvert Merlin. After some flip-flopping, I think I've gone back to my original position (for now). Introvert Merlin still feels right.

Why, you didn't ask?

Below I ramble about MBTI types despite actually knowing very little about the whole system. Read at your own risk.

(I want to clarify that I don't think there's anything scientific about MBTI classification. I like to think about it in the same way I would try to sort a character into a Hogwarts house. It's just fun.)

Since it was proving tricky to pinpoint Merlin's position on the Introversion/Extraversion spectrum, I decided to first narrow it down to a few MBTI types that might suit his character.

The 16 MBTI personalities can be divided into four “macro-categories” (known as “temperaments”):

Guardians

Artisans

Rationals

Idealists

To me Merlin obviously belongs in the "Idealists" group, which would make "NF" the "core" of his type (xNFx). This leaves us with two orientations still to be defined: "Extroversion vs Introversion" and "Judging vs Perceiving".

(The 4 MBTI dimensions)

Potentially, Merlin could be an:

INFP – The Mediator

ENFP – The Campaigner

INFJ – The Advocate

ENFJ – The Protagonist

Judging vs Perceiving

One thing I find interesting about Merlin is his decision-making process.

There are some momentous decisions that Merlin spends a considerable time agonising over – for example, whether to kill Morgana or, later on, Mordred – but once he's made a choice, he tends to actually be quite inflexible about it.

Seriously, good luck stopping the little guy once he's decided that something Must Be Done.

“Don't try and stop me, because...you can't.” (The Wicked Day, 4x03)

(That's right, Gaius. Fucking deal with it.)

Merlin will BULLDOZE his way to his goal regardless of anyone's opinion, sometimes even in the face of actual evidence suggesting this might actually be a Bad Idea™.

There is one significant occasion in which Merlin backtracks after having made a huge choice, and it's when he resolves to save Morgana's life after an accident he involuntarily caused (her fall down some stairs) left her deadly injured.

I'll come back to the reasons behind Merlin's change of mind later. What's interesting to notice is that, even in this case, once Merlin’s made his decision he sticks to it quite stubbornly.

He has to ask Kilgharrah for help to heal Morgana and his exchange with him, in case you don’t remember, goes something like this:

Kilgharrah: Merlin don't this is a terrible idea

Merlin: JUST FUCKING DO IT

This stubbornness – or better yet, inflexibility – makes me lean towards Judging rather than Perceiving as Merlin's preferred mental function.

While it's true that Merlin sometimes defers making a decision until it's no longer possible (see: freeing Kilgharrah), which is superficially similar to the way Perceivers prefer to keep their options open for as long as they can, Merlin doesn’t do it to see if new information might come up and help him make a better choice. He only needs time to internally evaluate the decision and consider how it aligns with his moral values.

Once a choice is made, Merlin can act very impulsively – as I've joked about here – and is very reluctant to deviate from the plan, which is typical of "Judger" types.

I also think this becomes especially apparent during the whole Mordred situation. Merlin never really pauses to take Mordred's actual actions into account when deciding whether or not he poses a threat to Arthur – despite Gaius trying to at least make him consider that Mordred might not mean the king any harm. Once Merlin decides that Morden is dangerous and needs to go, there's no turning back (not until it's too late).

Extroversion vs Introversion

(A typical introvert, according to most people.)

Merlin tends to make decisions based on his own values and feelings first. Yes, he will consult others in moments of doubt – like Gaius or Kilgharrah – but his first instinct and tendency is to do what feels right to him even when it's not the wisest or most logical course of action based on the facts at his disposal.

(Incidentally, I find this interesting when compared to Arthur, who – in my opinion – turns to others for counsel far more readily [Merlin, Gwen, Agravaine] and gives more weight to the advice he receives. Arthur’s actually more open and flexible than Merlin when presented with evidence that contradicts his worldview – see his attitude to magic at different points in the show, perhaps most notably in episode 5x05, when he decides to return to the Disir.)

Merlin's decision-making progress is very much inward focused, which makes me think of an Introvert rather than an Extrovert.

I'm thinking of Introvert vs Extrovert (or Extravert) in a Jungian sense here, which is to say, not (just) how someone interacts with others and how social interaction might drain or energise them – quite a subjective metric* – but rather whether they have a tendency to turn inwards or outwards to process information and react to external stimuli.

Or, in Jung's own words, whether someone is "more influenced by environmental influences or more influenced by subjective factors".

An introverted consciousness can be well aware of external conditions, but is not motivated by them. The extreme introvert responds primarily to internal impressions. (x)

In this specific sense, I think Merlin acts more as an Introvert than an Extrovert, which would make his MBTI personality type “INFJ”.

INFJ – The Advocate

INFJs are also known as Advocates, Protectors or (rather aptly, in Merlin's case) Counsellors.

I won’t go into a description of this personality type here – like I said I’m no expert, and you can Google it just as easily as I can. 

I’ll just highlight a few INFJ traits that I think are very relevant to Merlin.

Once they have formed an intuition about something, INFJs tend to stick to it very tightly, often to the point of being single-minded in their focus. INFJs are sometimes viewed as stubborn and unyielding. (x)

Because the INFJ has such strong intuitive capabilities, they trust their own instincts above all else. This may result in an INFJ's stubbornness and tendency to ignore other people's opinions. (x)

Something typical of INFJs is also having strong "hunches" (what Arthur would call "a funny feeling"). They are very much a "mystic" or "visionary" type.

INFJs have uncanny insight into people and situations. They get "feelings" about things and intuitively understand them. (x)

Of course, much of Merlin’s intuition is based on magic, but that isn't always the case.

When Gwen Comes Back Wrong™ from the Dark Tower, Merlin can sense she isn't quite the same. When Gaius asks him to elaborate, however, he is unable to articulate exactly why he feels that way, because there is nothing obviously different about Gwen.

MERLIN: Have you noticed anything about Gwen of late? GAIUS: Nothing unusual. Why? MERLIN: I'm not sure exactly. GAIUS: Something she’s said? Something she's done? MERLIN: No. It's nothing in particular. (A Lesson in Vengeance, 5x07)

I'd like to point out that 1. Merlin looks especially hot in this scene, 2. his "funny feeling" has nothing to do with magic here. In fact, it takes him stalking Gwen and digging for evidence to discover that she is conspiring with Morgana.

Advocates tend to carry around a sense – whether conscious or not – of being different from most people. With their rich inner lives and their deep, abiding desire to find their life purpose, they don’t always fit in with those around them. (...) Many Advocates feel that their life has a unique purpose – a mission that they were put onto this earth to fulfill. For people with this personality type, one of the most rewarding aspects of life is seeking out this purpose – and then, once they’ve found it, striving to do it justice. (x)

Merlin's search for purpose is one of his main drivers (if not the main one). He almost immediately asks Gaius if he knows why he was born with magic and is quite heartbroken when Gaius can't offer a satisfying answer. After Kilgharrah tells him about the prophecy that concerns him and Arthur, Merlin throws himself into his destiny wholeheartedly, readily adopting it as his life's purpose.

Another INFJ characteristic which I think fits Merlin’s character quite well is that INFJs are harmony-seekers and deeply concerned about others’ feelings.

We see it at times in Merlin’s interactions with Gaius – although the two of them have their disagreements, and Merlin can be quite vocal about his opinion, Merlin's first instinct is usually to keep secret anything that might upset or worry Gaius too much.

For example, when Gaius earnestly pleads with Merlin not to meet with Finna (The Kindness of Strangers, episode 5x10), Merlin gives an evasive answer rather than confronting him, despite having already made his decision.

Being at odds with Gaius is truly distressing to Merlin – as shown in episode 3x09 (Love in the Time of Dragons), where Merlin's dejection after an argument with Gaius is evident enough for Arthur to notice and try to offer his advice.

Although INFJs rely primarily on Introverted Intuition (their dominant function) this is supported by Extroverted Feeling, their auxiliary function.

Extraverted Feeling is the secondary function in INFJs. Deeply concerned with the energy, moods, and feelings of others, INFJs have deep insights into people and situations and make decisions based on how they will affect people. (x)

In stressful situations, an INFJ might try to rely on emotions when making decisions, especially if it means pleasing other people. (x)

I think the best example of the above trait is Merlin deciding to save Morgana’s life in episode 3x05 (The Crystal Cave) after his initial decision to let her die. He does not do this because of any new evidence or information – he still has every reason to believe Morgana poses a threat to the king and kingdom, if not immediately at least in the near future – but because he's witnessed how her imminent death is affecting those he cares about (in this case, Arthur and Gwen).

It could be argued that Merlin’s choice not to reveal his secret to Arthur is also partly motivated by his Extraverted Feeling tendencies rather than just self-preservation.

"I didn't want to put you in that position" – he tells Arthur – again, showing a keen awareness of other people's feelings and a desire to maintain social harmony.

You can read more about the INFJ personality type here:

Portrait of an INFJ and INFJ & Relationships

INFJ Personality

INFJ: Introverted, Intuitive, Feeling, Judging

----------------------------------------

*I've stumbled upon this article which elaborates on cognitive Extraversion/Introversion, as opposed to introversion and extraversion as they are commonly understood: Typing Tutorial

[queen-scribbles]

#YEEEESSSSSSS WHAT AN AMAZING GIFT 🥰💖🥰💖🥰💖#god I don't even know where to start it's all so good#tragen and marii understanding each other so well they can communicate without words or using the force YES#marii having a voice-kink and competence-kink and struggling to keep her mind out of the gutter while tragen gently threatens people YES YE#when brin actually thought he'd trapped them! 😂 alexa play 'now you fucked up' from whitest kids you know#the action! the fighting and the chase sequence! their banter! 😘🥰 YES YES YES YES#the contrast of tragen being so calm and in control as he casually wins 4v1 fights and sprints down hallways without even getting winded#vs aramarii 'force-assisted recklessness' wrinn ripping out wires and stabbing consoles and barreling around corners#him preferring to travel in her ship because his is too gloomy and scares people 😭 darling boy you would've made such a good jedi#(give her a hydrospanner and a week and she can fix it up. she's already planning a shopping trip to bed bantha and beyond with vette)#does he KNOW how sexy his voice is? that he could melt her into a puddle reading space-ikea instruction manuals?#or is he genuinely unaware of the power he wields? thank the stars he's not the type to use it for evil#okay I better stop before I write an entire tag novel 💖💖💖 I'm gonna go eat some cake and read this like. 30 more times

@haledamage I'M SO GLAD YOU LIKED IT. :D I did some poking around in Marii's tag for details and personality stuff but didn't have time to read everything, so I'm happy to have done her justice. 💖 (cut for length)

I love couples who know each other so well it's like they read minds or share thoughts, it's so good. They would clean up at one of those game shows where you have to writ down your partner's answer to a bunch of questions. xD I cannot blame Marii for any of those kinks bc they're all very fair ones to have wrt Tragen. Competence is extremely sexy. 😂 (I might have a bit of a Thing for the M!Warrior's voice. Just a little one. That may have bled through. I mentioned it was self-indulgent, right?)

And I've long headcanoned for Tragen's own universe--and now this one apparently-- that they don't make it common knowledge he has less of a Force connection than your average Jedi/Sith. Might be perceived as weakness yada yada. And people he fights are too busy trying to survive to notice he's like 95% martial skill/5% Force use. This is just one more benefit; someone like Brin goes "How do you catch a Sith? Get him away from his lightsaber and cut the Force and he's nothing" aaaannnnnnddd they're Very Very Wrong. >:3 I love the contrast between Tragen and Marii's personalities, and their complementary roles in escaping(I had to throw in combat. It's my Brand now) were so fun to work out. The thing about Tragen's ship is another long standing headcanon, and Vette will be thrilled to help Marii redecorate. She's already complained about it being gloomy multiple times before the end of the class story. xD (Now I want to write Marii "kidnapping" Vette for a girls' day which just means giving the Celestial Dawn a makeover and Vette's practically dancing with excitement the whole way through Bed Bantha and Beyond(I'm laughing at that again jsyk) bc she's wanted to do this for a DECADE, why didn't you start dating him sooner?!?!? shush with your logic about Emperor's Wrath and Jedi Battlemaster etc

Tragen is... aware some people(Marii included) find his voice attractive. He is NOT aware of just HOW Attractive. We are very lucky he's at least partially ignorant and not the type to use it for evil even if he fully understood bc holy HELL could he conquer galaxies. That voice? His charisma and diplomatic skills? the Arms? YEAH.

[momomiooo]

Essay😛

I think a problem a lot of people have with CI (including myself) is how different she is compared to the likes of v4 and talk. There was an obvious aesthetic set up by Gynoid that Cevio didn’t exactly follow through with and the color scheme came off as strange to me so i shall describe my few problems in sorta depth

Twitter

VFlower used to be EXTREMELY active almost like a person on twitter. I got curious during a car ride home and saw cevio attempted it but it didn’t hold the same strength as flowers did. While many people don’t even follow Vflowers account or even go through her post it’s still clear people liked having vocaloids seem realistic, like they were like us. It gave her a bit more relatability that could make even newer fans amazed. While The trend of realistic tweets from vocaloids has died down (sadly) to see they’re at least trying gives me hope for flowers future endeavors! Some of the things CIflower lacks are things that V posted which could be seen as risky for the company (some old tweets consisting of flower trying to flirt with girls, swooning over randos and talking about big boobs[😭???]) it gave flower some spice no other vocaloid softwares DARED to do!

Her Design

ah yes, the initial problem, her design. As fore-mentioned Cevio didn’t go with the exact color palette/scheme as the last few models but I still think it was a great idea. It feels like we’re watching an emo girl grow into adult-hood, flower now appearing to be around 17-24! The only problem is her color scheme. While I love the idea it just doesn’t fit flower and I think to make it work they had to change flowers most notable features, her hair and eyes. Her eyes have gone from magenta or pink (depending on who drew her when) to blue. Her hair also changed, getting a similar color to ia’s, more blonde and pink than white. And while I could go on about the software companies hating while haired characters (maybe they don’t sell as much like piko idk) or how they need to learn their audience consist of neurodivergent gays afraid of change, I don’t have an explanation for this one. Surely I could search and find out something but I don’t know why flower took such a leap from her talk vb to ci. I understand you change as you grow blah blah blah but still how did she go from confidence and the only problem you see is her dropping her head phones in talk to “c-can you p-pass the ketchup m-mi-miss?” She looks so scared and nervous😭.

Her voice

holllyyyyy crap. I could take the model, “pink eyes are unrealistic anyways… maybe it’s just shading” but the difference from AI and hand done is just.. wow… on one hand maybe maturing caused a bit more feminine to come into her life but oh my flying Fukase. Dunno whoever’s reading this but that whole “learn their audience” was observing how me and other autistic people felt about the design😭😭😭 I hate change so when I heard the lower one’s eyes cover I almost had a panic attack. Where is the angrodgany??? Where’s the vflower??? I get they’re supposed to sound realistic but it just sounds feminine. Could just be the creature of habit thing but I personally prefer her older voice banks just because of the power and emotion I feel from her voice. Some covers make her sound real, like she’s struggled just like us. So far the songs with CI in them sound… well.. AI. Advanced AI, sure, but ai nonetheless.

summary-ish

if you hate this woman now because of the design, take a deep breath and remember…

YOU CAN HEADCANON ANYTHING!!!!!

Re-make flower, nothing is canon other than existence, and even those boundaries are tested by creative people! Have fun making a flower that represents YOU. It’s a voice with a name and that’s all that matters. Self project on the plant and give her a life you’d like! Still don’t think she’s a girl? PRONOUN IT UP! Flower is just a singing software package, have fun making her what you want to see while supporting others:D

Have a good day I am done yammering

[modern-inheritance]

Ait, animatic peoples and randos just here for the weirdass MIC/IC animatic. Here's the plan for the day.

This will probably change but I'm here for lunch and looking through the absolute MESS I made of my layers and folders while fretting over the run sequence frames so we'll focus there.

Eyeglow for Run2 and redo the motion blur with that added.

Run4, the final frame of the run sequence. Like, the whole thing of it. I already did the grid (i think? i fuckin HOPE–) yesterday so just need to trace, add background, ect. I'm sticking with the gradient for the background that was started in Run3, it looked really wrong with just the grass color.

think of something fun for feral!Arya to say when she's looking at the guy in Run4 because that's NOT going to be a smear/motion frame and we get to have anxiety about THAT because we're constantly forgeting that EACH OF THESE ONLY SHOW UP FOR 0.4 SECONDS.

Slash frames. Get some glow on them, clean them up. might do the paths trick but I prefer the sketch look. Motion blur? we're gonna be tinkering.

Past that, if it gets done today, then we can focus back on Murtagh's arrow cam sequence.

The Young Rider sequence, at least the door opening and Murtagh stabbing the guy, need to be remade in MagicPoser now that I have swords and stuff.

I'm gonna wait for the weekend to plan out/build the stuff for the intro with the mountain and all that.

do a few quick frames of Murtagh shooting everyone. easy shots, prob just an overview with each person 'HURK! blargh *faceplant*' from above. OO or maybe a few diff angles, quick to each–

Try not to panic about the dragon parts. If you have to, you can...you can try to export-import from MP to daz but that sounds like pain and tweaking it all in daz just with the dragon model sounds painful but not quite as much.

And yes. Yes we are going to start planning out Eragon's scenes. There's some finicky stuff I need to do with the final part of the Young Rider sequence, which could involve me doing music mashups and inserts again, but we'll cross that later. But there are indeed IDEAS for 'Oh My God He's The Most Powerful Man On The Continent and We Made Him Mad and Threatened The People He Loves and Protects that is not a human nor a man that is a fucking MONSTER–'!Eragon.

:3 because I don't think I've ever shown Eragon post war yet in an angry state. I'm a bit excited.

ooo. Do you think he's started trying to grow some scruff? Arya did find it a bit fetching on Fäolin, maybe he's gonna try and get somethin growing.... He still looks YOUNG, but he's in his mid 20s at this point, and while his growth and aging has stalled there due to his elf stuff now, he does look Man and not Boy/Teen.

hmmmm

I"m getting too detailed again alright i need to actually EAT MY FUCKING LUNCH WHY IS THERE ONLY FOUR MINUTES LEFT–

[zenosanalytic]

Paintbrush, PlasGlue, and Holy Clippers: Sparse Marns Part II: Assembly

RIGHT! Let’s get to CHOPPIN >:> >:> WHATS IN THE BAAAAAACHS?!??!

Here are the (gender inclusive: they’re Transhuman Childsoldier Fleshwarbots)Lads I’ll be turning from Bits to Bums

A squad of five Primaris Heavy Intercessors; I bought these because my gameshop had them. I’m not a particular fan of the Space Marines, I’ve ALWAYS preferred the Xenos factions and Certain Cultures among the Horribly Maligned Natives of the Empyrean(Guess Which One :> :> :> It’s a CINCH!!), tho I DO, actually, have a wee little OC Chapter of my very own of headcanony significant(in this I am utterly unique among GW fans, I am Sure u_u u_u) which I hope to paint up an army for one day. However: I need to practice on something and my game shop has very few votanni boxes so here we are. Coincidentally I do also like the Adepta Sororitas(Space Battle Nuns), and that may come up later who knows u_u

Here is What’s in the Bachs. Look what they’ve done to my boys. These are the fabled Spruce, which we all pronounce ‘Sproose’ for some unfathomable English Reason. I’ve been spelling it Sprues up til now because I, Civic Mindedly, want you to know how to say it. No I didn’t call them “Spruces” for literally 20+ years of my life why would you think that of me??? Also there are their bases above, a contact sheet(I may or may not get to these later cuz they are A Hassle), and the instruction manual. I know this looks like allot but, Trust Me, it’s only five guys. Five Horribly, Horribly Mutilated Guys unu unu

But even Greater Horrors await us...

OH GODS! The humanity. Should I censor the image? I just found them like this I Swear your honor.

This is them clipped and gathered into the five builds I decided to use. I’d have liked to do process pics for that but, as but a wee snek, I cannot clip bits from sprues and operate a camera at the same time unu They are, reading the pic like a page from top left to bottom right, a Sargent(mandatory), Heavy Weapons Guy(optional. If you dont take em you can upgrade the whole squad’s rifles for free, but the Heavy is So Chunk so...), and Three Rifliers(it’s totally a word shutup unu) I decided on these by looking through the instructions

which look like that. They’re unnecessarily confusing. The way it SAYS it works is each build is color coded, but also numbered, but then sometimes the numbers are ALSO different steps in the same build, and then variants of the build are lettered(except when they’re numbered). I’d prefer if the steps were the letters and the numbers were build-exclusive, but you get used to it and the builds are so well engineered that you can’t really use “the wrong” part and end up stuck or anything. It’s important to do the steps for each build in the proper order but I’ll get to that later.

Here’s the thing: according to ppl who should know these things, they coat the sprues in “release agents” during manufacture to keep them from sticking together, so you need to clean that stuff off or the paint wont stick later. So, After I clipped them I washed them in

the cups from before, and quickly realized I’d overfilled the soapy one. You don’t need ALLOT of water there, just enough to cover the pieces. So after the first two I dumped it, used a more reasonable amount, and it went fine. The process is this: clip out your pieces, put them in the soap, swish em around a few times with a suitable digit, then pick em out and dump em in the clean water, swish, then set to dry on the paper towel. Easy Peasy.

When they’re dry(I waited 30ish minutes I think? Should have probably timed it -__-) You can start gluing them together. BUT NOT SO FAST!

These are mold lines. They’re a product of the way the Bits are cast, and they need to be removed before you start assembly-proper because it’d be a Hassle trying when they models are built and also they’d interfere with the joins. Most hobby companies make a “mold line remover” tool which, presumably is designed and shaped to do this job well, but honestly I just use the back of my hobby knife. Finger nails are also pretty good at the job:

et voila! That was just with nails. Sometimes the lines will be soft enough that you can, and sometimes they won’t. You’ll notice, also, that some details are just too small to really get at the lines without destroying the whole structure and that’s fine; you don’t need to go all out on the lines there. I might get a line remover at somepoint just to see how they do but honestly I feel like it’s a bit Finicky when finger nails and the back of a hobby knife work just fine. It’s not just mold lines tho:

that Weird grey-white accumulation center screen on the bit is where the sprue connected. When you cut them free, often there will be a little bit left cuz Physics. This, usually, is something you’ll need to use your hobby knife for, and this time I mean the sharp side. Remember: gentle, controlled, shaving and slicing, move in one direction and don’t saw, aim for a shallow angle. Some ppl will describe this process as “scooping it out” but I think “making the surface smooth” is a better description(cuz that’s what you’re aiming for). Once you get most of the sprue-smut off with the cutty-end, you can then try the back of the knife, or a file, or your nails to finish smoothing. A few of these were tough enough to justify the file for me, but most weren’t and I just cleaned with nails and the back of the knife.

AND ANOTHER THING(omg)

This is one of the bolters(technically bolt rifles with Primaris marines), and as you’ll notice the barrel is a whole plug. But that’s not how gun barrels work! This is where the Hobby Drill comes in, tho honestly it’s really more of a pride/vanity thing and you don’t REALLY need to do it. It’s a pretty simple process; what I did was make a pilot divot with the tip of my awl-file, then used the smallest bit on my drill to drill a hole until it looked like it was as deep as the front bit of the barrel there, and then I drilled out the side holes. After the first one, I realized it’d be simpler to drill out the side holes first,and then drill from the front. Since the side holes are already recessed, you don’t really need to bother with making a pilot divot, tho you might want to trade off side to side if you’re worried about drilling at the wrong angle.

OK: FINALLY:: NOW::: PEOPLE FROM PIECES:::: AGAIN NO PROCESS PICS SURRRR:::::

Here’s the Sargent. They had allot of bare head options but imo That’s Stupid: why would someone go into a fight without a helmet? That prevents critical hits!! People keep their brains in there and honestly I think that’s a better idea than them floating around, wild and free.

cHeavy Weapon. On the one hand I like this sculp, on the other I really do think that tubing is Fiddly and Dumb and part of me desperately wanted to cut off the parts attached to the gun, and not include the parts which needed gluing. [EDIT: I Originally Forgot to put in this part X|] Also I put the arms on too early, and didn’t attach them to the gun first, so I had to DEtach them(A Hassle), attach them to the gun, then to the torso, THEN I knocked off his leg wrestling those into place; it was a nightmare. SO: Follow the Steps.

I THINK(???) I set him up with the armor-piercing ammo tin, but honestly WH40k is so RNGesus that taking the assault variant with, like, twice the attack dice is probably the way to go over two measly shots at -2Armor. Realistically most units will get vaporized a turn after firing, if they even survive that long(Heavy Intercessors probably will; they’ve got three wounds, which is as much as a light vehicle, and the whole squad is like 15 or 16, I forget if the Sargent gets an extra, which is as much as a Flipping Tank. Most infantry only have one), so maximizing your dice-count seems to be the best strategy.

I affectionately(derogatory) call this Lad “Stumbly”. Of all the builds they had the hardest time standing(they EVEN came off their stand at one point, but I’ll get to that later) because the illusion of forward motion makes it VERY fore-heavy, but once I attached the backpack/lifesupport it stood Okish. I like to imagine they’re not looking forward cuz they just saw a Really Neat Bug. Maybe they’re stepping around it; maybe they were just Trudging along to murk some space-elves and then ‘OH! Cute Bug!! Sorry, Sir, go about your day’ redirecting around it with their Transhuman Murderbot Reflexes uwu

You can’t really see it in this pic, cuz the angle is Awesome, but this Lad looks like they’re in the middle of raising their gun, so I’ve named them “Surprise!”. Their bolt-rifle barrel REALLY makes me wish I could have gotten the next size up bit in that drill -___- Presumably they were in the middle of some Important Discussion, Possibly about Neat Bugs, when a malnourished religious dissident stumbled out of the bushes and, well, Atheist-Space-Murder-Catholicism’s just Not That Great what can I say? That starving waif had Theses locked and loaded and they Needed to Die u_u u_u

This Lad’s reloading cuz, while everyone else was Lollygagging about Neat Bugs, they were Getting Shit Done. I’ve named them Already-Done-Shooting, or Ads, and I Love Them even tho they’re a bit annoying u_u u_u u_u

And here’s The Whole Squad, Based

I’m sorry for how blurry that looks; I Know Nothing about posting pics to tumblr and I refuse to learn.

Anyway: There’s All the Heavy Intercessors assembled and glued to their 44mm(I think?) bases ^v^ After this I used the Mister Dissolved Putty to fill in any gaps(cHeavy’s Heavy Bolter barrel had a pretty significant one), and then glued some Additional Bits to each model the next morning(this one), but I forgot to take pics before progressing further X| X| Tomorrow I document that progress in: The Undercoat

EDIT: GAH! that’s the POST BUTTON not the SCHEDULE BUTTON X| X| X| oh well I’ll reblog tamarrah -__-

[sketch-shepherd]

rambling some RWBY stuff

I said I needed a hiatus for a while because March has been a terrible month for me but I gotta get this off my chest. I’m gonna be talking stuff about RWBY ship discourse and a new direction I’m taking in regards to enjoying the show. 

I know I said I moved on from openly talking about RWBY ship discourse since like 2020 so I’m only gonna make an exception this once because the events of V9E6 are too big for me to ignore (spoiler warning I guess cuz the episode is still super new at the time I’m writing this)

So if you’re not interested in hearing me reflect on my fandom experience and where I’m currently docked in terms of my RWBY ships then don’t read the rest of the cut. 

Those who know me know that I really, really don’t like B/umbleby. Both in terms of actual writing because I find it forced with poor buildup and the toxic fanbase ruined any appeal the ship had for me literally since my early days of being in the fandom. So it should come to no surprise I’m not happy with it officially becoming canon in this episode

Though... frankly I normally wouldn’t have put much thought into how well B/umbleby is written or not because I generally just have low standards for ships in general (ffs I’ve gushed over ships from other shows that had like overall two minutes of buildup), but it’s mainly the toxic fans who really destroyed the appeal the ship had for me which is why I started to care about it way more than I should have. But I’m getting off topic, the point of this wasn’t to write an essay about my thoughts on B/umbleby. 

Likewise, those who know me also know I’ve always had a strong preference for its rival ship B/lacksun. Things are little complicated with that right now, but after some careful consideration I think I’m ready to dip out of the B/lacksun community too. 

Now, I’m not saying I no longer support B/lacksun, far from it. I still like B/S as a ship itself since I consider it way better written than B/B and it has more actual communication and chemistry. But frankly from my experience I just haven’t had any fun in the B/S community for a really long time. While not as bad as the toxic B/umbleby fanbase, I’ve dealt with too many B/S shippers being so outright toxic and overwhelmingly negative... I’m at the point where I’d rather just not contribute altogether. 

So yeah, being in the crossfire of both of these ships, dealing with stupid toxic fans/antis alike and giving myself more paranoia and anxiety than I asked for for five whole years straight really hasn’t done favors for my mental health. So at this point I just think my enjoyment of RWBY will be easier if between the two I just don’t add anything to either community. 

So what does this mean for me? Like I said, I definitely don’t hate B/lacksun as a ship itself. I might just ship it silently and maybe still include it in my AU’s or something. I’m just not gonna openly contribute to the B/lacksun community anymore

Sorry for anyone who’s liked my B/lacksun content back when I was really passionate about it in my earlier days of the fandom (if any of said people are somehow even reading this since I’ve disbanded from the fandom so much over the years).. but for anyone who cares I guess, you’re just gonna have to get used to me just straight up not engaging in B/lacksun publicly anymore. No longer drawing fanart (probably not even for a commission), liking/reblogging any posts related to the ship, writing about it, just overall making actual content. 

I still like the ship for what it is, but I’m not gonna openly invest in it anymore. Definitely not compared my other RWBY ships I casually talk about like R/osegarden, L/adybug, F/reezerburn, M/onochrome, etc... That’s basically what’s become of B/lacksun for me. B/umbleby on the other hand... yeah I still dislike it like I always have. 

Sigh... but I digress. This weekend has basically given me a reason to reset. Half a fucking decade is not a good period of time to worry so damn much about ship discourse to the point it came at the expense of the real reason I enjoy RWBY... which is the plot and characters. 

That’s all. THAT was the real reason I became drawn to RWBY when I first started watching it back in 2018. Not the stupid fucking shipping. Shipping was never going through my mind when I first bingewatched Volumes 1-5. Hell, my interest in shipping didn’t come until way later as like a second thought until I started looking at fan content more. 

And now that I’ve seen what worrying over shipping so much did for me for five years straight... I’m turning a new leaf. A “stop giving a fuck” leaf. My experience of loving RWBY in the past five years would have been so much different if I didn’t prioritize ship wars over everything. 

But, like I said. I’m undoing all that now. Going back to the mindset I had when I was new to the show before I learned of ship discourse and fandom drama. And I’m gonna see if it works for the rest of V9, as well as the rest of the show. 

This is also NOT an invitation to talk about ship discourse or r/wde shit in my dm’s (something I unfortunately HAVE to say based on past experiences of people taking my words as r/wde or criticism shit). I wrote this ramble as a means of explaining that I still truly love RWBY despite some of the narrative choices I don’t like and cutting the fandom drama out. 

To conclude in words of moistcr1tikal, that’s about it. See ya. 

[displacedarchon]

Every so often I have the thought, that I should keep Haruchefant alive in Himi’s FFXIV story.  Because I’ve grown to really like their chemistry and writing the two’s adventures is REALLY fun. (Plus who doesn’t want to see angy Haurchefant vs Zenos?) Buuuuut.  Himi is a character I’ve had for 20ish years, give or take. She’s always been a FF/KH oc and due to the nature of things, especially when I started rping with her.... She’s never really had to deal with someone dying and it not being reversible, as a character overall.  It’s not that no one EVER died...but she or someone else could resurrect them. Or they’d come back in some other way.  Including her!  She was part of a consistent RP story line for 15ish years, so there’s NO way I could even begin to delve into everything she’s done in one post. FFXIV Himi has inherited the appearance, a couple of the names, and character traits of Original Himi, she’s truly a shard in a way!  FFXIV Himi is obviously not...a keyblade wielder who has harassed Sora on more than one occasion for Orichalcum, but , y’know. And it’s not that death didn’t ever have an impact or was never taken seriously or never had its solemn moments, it’s just that when your friends are varying degrees of Immortal at best, or at worst, need to be brought back to life every so often there’s less FEAR when it happens. At least for her.  Which is why, that even thought FFXIV Himi didn’t go through anything that Original Himi did, I’m letting Haurchefant die when he does in HW.  Because WOW. When I think about how that would affect her? Her character develops and grows in a way that Original Himi NEVER could (unless jump the shark forced).  It changes how she handles the rest of HW, it changes how she acts in Stormblood, (especially when Thancred passes out) hell, it changes how she interacts with Emet-Selch in Shadowbringers, and by the time Endwalker rolls around she’s not just heehoo Original Himi implanted into FFXIV anymore. Through ARR and the start of HW, she’s a pacifist as much as possible because her healing magic isn’t working as well as it used to. She prefers teleporting her enemies away, or sleeping them, unless she is FORCED to kill other people, she avoids it. After Haurchefant? She’d struggle to still have mercy.  She’d struggle with the title of “Warrior of Light”. When Thancred collapses and for a split second she thinks he’s dead? Aymeric removes her from the room as quickly as he possibly can because she’s got the same expression on her face as the day Haurchefant died and he knows she’s about to start screaming and he’d rather hear her scream like that twice than let anyone else hear her in that much distress once.  Emet-Selch, an Unsundered Ascian? Jumped into the role of Emperor Solus? WELL; he’s already implied that he knew her before the sundering and was quite fond of her so WHAT IF she just tries to convince him to ditch the whole rejoining thing and forget about Zodiark and become a good guy again because HEY he’s immortal which means that he wouldn’t die on her unless SHE stabbed him with a weapon of light so what if she made a genuine effort to get ALL her memories back and rekindle whatever they USED to have and she’d never have to worry about the person she loved dying on her ever again!  And then, in Endwalker, when she decides she’s not a hero because she can’t smile anymore, how does she unpack all the grief that’s been eating away at her slowly? Aggrevated by, more deaths that can’t be undone and never given the time she needs to rest, to grieve, to heal?  What prevents her from helping Fandaniel? What stops her from giving into the Dynamis and turning into a monster, being lost forever?  Hell, how is she able to fight crystal mom? Or Meteion?  How does she make it to the end of Endwalker at ALL?  So as fun as it would be to have Haurchefant (and others) live, to see him smack his shield across Zenos’s face, or have him knock some sense into the Crystal Exarch, or giving the peppiest pep talk to Meteion.  The weight of grief, and how it changes her, would be more interesting and enjoyable for me to explore. Because it’s not a weight that I’ve ever explored with that character in the 20 years that I’ve had her. She’s always had a poetic realtionship with death, and not that there wouldn’t be any poetry for FFXIV, it works better, I think anyways for FFXIV which really seems to want to tackle the meaning of grief (even if the WoL model is silent and has 3 expressions the entire ti,e. dahsjdasjkdhaks). 

[mik3ysprincess03]

Tokyo Revengers boyfriend scenarios: how they make up after a fight

☰ Characters: Mikey, Draken, Kazutora, Mitsuya, Kokonoi, Hanma, Ran, Rindou, Sanzu.

A/N do you all have any preference as to who I add in the head cannons, should I bring chifuyu in? I am sorry these are a little long, I may have gotten carried away! I’m not sure if you all prefer these detailed or shorter.

Warnings: Light smut, fluff, daddy kink, cat calling, NSFW 18+. Reader is female!

Find my head cannon master list for Tokyo Revengers here :)

Taglist (comment to join): @shibuyawardnetwork @reiners-milkbiddies @winterv-black

Please like, reblog and comment if you’ve enjoyed. It helps support my blog! ↺ (ෆ˙ᵕ˙ෆ)♡ be sure to stay hydrated this summer and use sunscreen.

Draken:

•Dense and clueless. Let's be real.

•You and Draken had a fight, out of all things it was about how he wasn’t around enough. Draken would spend a ton of time at D&D motors or with his friends outside of work time instead of being with you as much.

•Of course you didn’t mind that Draken had friends who he would hang out with, but he was seemingly oblivious to the fact you were his girlfriend and wanted more time with him?? Big brain Ken bf moment.

•Where was your time for dates? As soon as Draken came home he either ate food silently at the table with you or just went to bed, or would try to provoke you to have sex with him. He thought it was enough. He even brought a dang watermelon come and gave you a slice and said it was a present, which was sweet and all, but you wanted to cuddle, go on dates, be around him more. One day you had enough and wanted to be clear with him. You missed the little things like him brushing your hair too.

•You were out doing some shopping at the mall, treating yourself to your favourite items such as some makeup, clothes and snacks. It’s always fun to treat yourself. That’s when you left the mall and walked down a few blocks and saw Draken, Mikey, Mitsuya and some of the other guys standing beside some motorcycles chatting away. Your eyebrow twitched as you saw Draken, you approached the group. “Hey (Name). Good to see you.” Mikey greeted you and you smiled nodding your head. “Draken.” You said crossing your arms and frowning.

•”What are you giving me that look for?” He snapped looking down at you. Draken never appreciates sass.

•”Is that anyway to treat your girlfriend?! You are hardly around anymore and you barely put in time to spend time alone with me or go on dates. I don’t even remember the last time you fucking hugged me or said you loved me.” You spat as you heard Mikey reply with an “uh oh, kenny’s in trouble”.

•”I have been around, what are you talking about? We see each other daily. Don’t my actions tell you that I love you? I bring you food and I let you wear my clothes when I’m gone, quit your bitching.” This stung, it made you begin to cry “you’re so dense Draken.” You sobbed before turning on your heels the other way to head back to your apartment.

•”Come on man, you never told us you weren’t spending so much time with your girl. Girl's can get sentimental about these things, you should put in more effort for her.” Mitsuya told Draken once you stormed off.

•Draken was in a sour mood the rest of the day. He really did love you. After reflecting on his emotions and getting a pep talk from Mitsuya about how you were trying to get his attention all along, he knew he had to make it up to you.

•Later that evening you were laying on your bed, after crying your heart out the whole day. Did Kenny not love you anymore? Why didn’t he stop you from walking away? You were taken out of your thoughts when you heard the front door to the apartment open, he was home. Draken who was wearing his usual black and white cardigan, black pants and his hair done came into the room with a bag in hand. “We need to talk.”

•”I’m sorry, (Name). I had no idea that my lack of attention towards you has hurt you so much, I guess admittedly I can be a bit clueless about these things. I love you, I hope you can forgive me.” His voice was monotone yet sincere, he handed you the bag as you took it cautiously. When you opened it, there was a small pink box with a ribbon around it. Once undoing the ribbon and revealing what was inside the box, you saw a beautiful silver promise ring. Your heart melted.

•”I promise I’ll always stick by your side.” He said in reference to the ring, pointing to a ring on his index finger, it was a plain silver one. “F-fine I forgive you… I love you too.” You bit down on your lip. “I love it, thank you so much Kenny. But please make more time for me, I miss going on dates and cuddling.”

•He got in between your legs on the bed as he wrapped his arms around you. His scent was so comforting, it was your boyfriend’s scent. “I missed my good girl too, yeah? When was the last time we made love?” Your lips instantly turned from a frown to a smile as you giggled.

•”Mm I dunno. I’ve missed it though, daddy.” Your smile turned into a smirk. As his hands began to trail all over your body. His lips pressing against yours and colliding “Need daddy’s cock, huh? Take those panties off and spread your legs for me, show me what I’ve been missing.” He commanded.

Mikey:

•He gets childish when he is mad or when you two fight. Though you two always make things up with dorayaki.

•Mikey was never too much of a jealous boyfriend, but damn he was overprotective over his girl. He made his presence known as your boyfriend by wrapping his arm around you, placing his hand on your thigh while sitting together, holding hands and even kissing you, Manjiro didn’t care. He was proud to show you off.

•He usually scared of most guys with having the reputation as the “Invincible Mikey”, knowing that your boyfriend would beat anyone’s ass who came near you or put you in harms way. Seemingly, overtime Mikey would just get more controlling and defensive over you. Which one day, while you two were out and you were wearing a stunning (favorite color) dress, some makeup and your hair done up. You looked stunning, as usual.

•After going to a fancy and lavish restaurant for lunch, you and Mikey walked around the district and you walked past a group of what seemed to be a pathetic and amateur gang. Some of the men began to whistle at you, it made you slightly uncomfortable. “Damn, looking fine as hell sexy. Love those tits in your dress.” One of the disgusting men snorted at you, which you bit your lip in discomfort.

•Mikey was already boiling with anger. “I guess you idiots are apart of some pathetic gang, be careful about talking to my girlfriend like that.”

•”U-Um thanks.” You responded awkwardly before one of the men spoke again “can you give me some directions for how I can get into your panties?” Mikey glaring right at the men, who even looked like trash.

•This is when Mikey took matters into his own hands as he began to throw kicks at the men, instantly throwing them down, blood was drawn. He didn’t want to get his hands dirty.

•You stood back in fear “Mikey isn’t this too much…? Let’s just go, before the cops come!” You begged him, biting down on your fingernails hesitantly as some of the men from that lame gang ran off.

•”Why did you just let that happen?“ Your blonde haired boyfriend glared at you, he could be childish and he was feeling jealous so he put the blame on you. “You should’ve told them to fuck off and go to hell, you know I’d protect you and back you up.” Mikey snorted. You let out a sigh and your face began to feel hot as anger bubbled up within you.

•You weren’t just going to yell at a group of strange men telling them to “fuck off” you would’ve just ignored them and went on your way, confrontation like that wasn’t always safe. “Mikey. Do you realize you don’t need to go ballistic every time something happens to me? I would’ve just ignored them.”

•This was when he began ignoring you and getting into a cold tone. “Fine, let’s just go home.” Mikey adjusted the collar of his white shirt as the walk home to your shared apartment was silent. You knew you didn’t fuck up, of course you appreciated Mikey looking out for you but he had no reason to be so childish and ignore you.

•The rest of the day Mikey spent it on the couch across from you, turning on his cell phone to make some phone calls. Eventually, you two were sitting in silence with TV on in the background. “Why do you keep looking at me?” You asked with some attitude.

•”Why do you keep looking at me is the question.” Mikey bluntly replied, leaning against the couch across from you with his chin propped up on his hand. “Hmph, I appreciate you protecting me but sometimes you take things to the extreme.” You let out, before Mikey got up from his seat and grabbed your arms placing them above your head, pinning them. “Extreme?” He asked.

•”L-listen Mikey, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to get mad at you.”

•“I’m sorry too, cutie.” He sighed before glancing around the room, “now you’ve gotta make it up to me, baby.”

•Your eyes widened as you bit your lip, he was learning down and gazing into your (color) orbs. “You do look sexy, though. Can’t deny that.” He grinned

•”Oh yeah? How can I make it up to you, babe?” You asked with a playful expression, he paused and thought momentarily. “How about you suck my cock like a good girl, let me remind you who you belong to. Then I’ll make you cum with my tongue, I’m the only man who can give you the best pleasure.”

Kazutora:

•Kazutora was extremely jealous and the overprotective type, crazy bf vibes. Again, he has been to jail once and he isn’t afraid to go again. 💀

•You had some male friends you were fairly close with, and at a party while drunk you were sitting in between two of your guy friends, smiling and having a good time.

•Kazutora who was standing near by was getting annoyed and possessive.

•He honestly enjoys scaring your male friends...lol.

•Your male friend had a blue alcoholic drink you wanted to try, so he let you take a sip from his cup. This is what bothered Kazutora. “(Name). What do you think you are doing?” He asked. “He just let me have a sip of his drink I thought it looked cool, it’s not a big deal sweetie!” You defended yourself and your friend.

•You had been hanging around your group of guy friends lately and it’s been a little too close for Kazutora’s comfort. You could he unintentionally flirty and playful which pissed him the fuck off. ”I’m sick of you getting so close to close to these weak dudes, all the hugs, sharing drinks, it’s too much now.” Kazutora glared at the guys you were sitting with.

•”Or maybe you are just crazy for the attention.” His eyes turned dark and had the maniac flare in them.

•What made it worse was also the fact you had his shirt on. You were his girlfriend, his girl, his precious baby to protect. Tora would even get jealous and give other dudes the death stare while you two were at the beach, if anyone glanced at you in the wrong way he took it personally. Kazutora his gotten into fights over you before.

•”Don’t you fucking dare call me that. I-I’m sorry. I won’t hug them as much and I’ll be more mindful to your feelings. But we are just friends, I’ve known these guys my whole life, I love you only Kazutora!” You say standing up from your spot and walking towards him.

•Perhaps you didn’t realize his jealously was also rooted from some inner insecurity. You held Kazutora’s hand and led him to another room, trying to calm him down. “Why would you say that?! You know I love you and only you.” Tears rolled down your cheeks as he realized his words hurt you.

•The man paused for a moment, running his hand through his black and bleached bright blonde strands of hair — he paced around the empty room as you trembled. “I’m so sorry for calling you that, (Name). You don’t deserve that baby, I love you so much. It just makes me feel a little jealous when those guys get so close to you, I know how guys are like and you are a gorgeous babe. I don’t want to lose you.” Kazutora confessed as his eyes lock with yours.

•You understood what he meant and forgave him. Of course, he shouldn’t have said that. But you knew Kazutora didn’t mean that and really just needed reassurance.

•You both decided to leave the party and take a night time walk together, holding hands while sorting everything out. Communication goes miles.

read more below the cut <3

Mitsuya:

•Mitsuya and you were a very close couple, your relationship was built on a ton of trust and loyalty. He was very considerate towards you.

•Fighting with him as your boyfriend is impossible!!

•You two were out at night, Mitsuya was meeting up with some old friends and you were wearing a very short skirt and a revealing top. Which he didn’t mind, he felt secure and you looked great. The looks other men and his friends gave you slightly irked him.

•When you two came back home as soon as you closed the front door Mitsuya spoke “so, was wearing such a short skirt necessary for tonight? You looked gorgeous but I think it was a little too short for public.” The lavender haired man fiddled with the keys in his hand.

•”Well what did you think of it?! I was trying a new look out.” You said in a bubbly tone.

•Mitsuya worked in fashion and designing and he often used you as his main subject for wearing his designs and testing out styles. He made you clothes often too. “It looked tacky.” He muttered.

•”What?” You asked hurt. Before Mitsuya realized his words came out wrong, so wrong. “I didn’t mean it like that, baby. I’m so sorry. I just meant, the outfit is a little short and revealing. The clothes don’t look so amazing, you look amazing in them but I could make you a skirt you’d look much sexier in.” He apologized.

•”I didn’t realize others were checking me out. I didn’t mean to make you upset. I’m sorry.” You pouted, looking into your boyfriends hazy eyes.

•”I’m sorry for coming off that way, you always look beautiful. Speaking of which… I made you something I’d like to see on you.” Mitsuya gave a soft smile. He was a mature man, he grew up raising his younger sisters, it was a genuine mistake and a statement he made without thinking.

•You nodded your head but felt puzzled, you followed him to your bedroom. He reached into his side of the closet and brought out a lovely, white, lace summer dress. He tailored it to fit you perfectly, so that’s why he was taking measurements of you a few weeks ago.

•”Try it on. I thought it would be a pretty summer dress you could wear out. You will look like an angel.” He softly smiled. Your eyes lit up in excitement.

•You stood up eagerly and began to undress, which Mitsuya tried to look the other direction to avoid getting horny and turned on. But ended up biting his lip and checking your body out as he saw the pretty set of lingerie you had on, the way your breasts looked covered in that bra, how your panties hugged your hips.

•You slipped the dress on and he helped zip it up in the back. “Give me a spin.” He smirked, his eyes watching your every movement as you spun around to show off your dress. “So beautiful.” He praised.

•”I might need to make a few adjustments but you look perfect. It looks so amazing on you, my sexy girl.” Mitsuya hummed.

•You admired yourself in the mirror for a minute as Mitsuya took a seat on the bed. You managed to unzip the dress and got yourself out of it. “So what do you think of my new set of lingerie though?” You giggled.

•His eyes widened with surprise, “come here and I’ll tell you all about it.” He ordered pointing to his lap.

Kokonoi:

•Kokonoi was often going gambling or spending time at casinos, it could get in the way of spending time with you. And one night this really upset you.

•You called him on the phone as you were feeling particularly anxious and wanted him to come home. You were at the apartment alone and there was a thunderstorm, which you were scared of.

•He picked up the damn phone on the last ring. “Hey sweetie pie, what’s up?” His charming voice spoke to you through the phone.

•”Can you please come home?” You asked nervously. “Why? You know I’m gambling right now, love.” He asked in confusion yet stern.

•A sound of thunder filled the room as you shrieked. How did he not remember you were scared of thunderstorms?

•”I’m scared, please come home Koko!” You begged. “Stop playing games, is there actually a problem hun?” Kokonoi said he’d be home before 11 PM and it was now 11:30 and the storm was getting worse.

•”You said you’d be home 30 minutes ago! There is a thunderstorm outside and I’m scared, you don’t even remember what your own girlfriend is scared of?” You snapped.

•That is when he realized he fucked up. “(Name), my beautiful girl… I’m so sorry I totally lost track of time. I, I am so sorry. I am coming home right now.”

•You gave a few soft cries through the phone as Kokonoi stayed on speaker phone while he was being driven home. He drive took a bit longer than expected but you assumed it was from the rain storm? Once he was home he rushed into your bedroom and wrapped you in a tight hug and kissed your forehead.

•”I’m sorry baby girl. Does this make it any better?” From behind his back he pulled out a set of designer pjs and a cute plushie. He loved to spoil you.

•”It’s okay, I’m happy you’re here now.” You felt safe again.

•You put on your new pjs before cuddling with Koko in bed and peacefully falling asleep. <3

Hanma:

•Hanma loves getting into trouble, as you know his often regular habits of getting into fights, or some smaller crimes such as stealing.

•Hanma decided one night he was going to break into a designer store with some of his friends, this was while you were home asleep. He ended up stealing a designer perfume and a bag for you. The gifted it to you the next day and you were suspicious. At first he played it off as he purchased it and not to worry about where he got it from, but you figured out he did in fact steal. (Don’t steal everyone!)

•”Hanma, what the fuck! You can’t just steal and gift me this, it was 2000$ no damn way! You can get in serious trouble!” You freaked out telling him. “So? I’d never get caught. I did this for you princess, you know how much I love you.” He was offended you were going off on him.

•You glared up at your boyfriend who was standing before you with your arms crossed. “You did not need to steal a 2000$ bag and expensive perfume for me. If you wanted to give me a gift for our anniversary all you needed to do is tell me you loved me, not put yourself at risk you idiot.” You lectured him. “God damn, do I ever get a day where my girlfriend won’t stop bitchin’. Chill out shorty.” The taller male certainly did not like being told what to do.

•”What?” You stammered. “I love you so much, I just don’t want you getting arrested or in trouble. It’s too risky Hanma. I don’t want to be visiting my boyfriend in jail.”

•The dark haired male who was wearing a grey shirt and black shorts looked at you and simply walked out of the room. Then you heard him leave the apartment, you opened up your phone to realize it was 12 AM, you must’ve really bothered him.

•You now sat worried in bed, until you heard the door open an hour later. Then you saw Shuji walk in the room, he opened up his phone to show you a photo of the designer items he left outside the store he stole from. “What about finger prints?” You asked. “They can catch me if they can, nobody can keep up to me. Look,” he said.

•He handed you a bag which he ordered food from your favourite restaurant that was open late, inside was your favourite food, appetizer, dessert, drink and a plushie. He had the receipt as proof. You looked up at him and blushed. “T-thank you Hanma, I love you.” You grinned.

•After eating your food (which of course you shared with him)! He began looking into your eyes, grabbing you as he pulled you into his lap. “I love you, (Name).” You felt your crotch press up against his as you wiggled around and blushed shyly.

•”Want me to make it up to you and show you how sorry I am? Let’s be honest, it’s been a bit since you let me drill that pretty pussy.” His deep voice spoke into your ear as he pressed kisses on the back of your neck, before sucking on the side of your neck, leaning a mark. You whined in response.

•”Perhaps… Mm yeah, it has been awhile.” You giggled. “I’ve missed my lil cum slut. Do you need daddy to give you some foreplay before I fuck that pussy and choke you?” His smirk on his face was damn hot, you took a hold of his hand as you squeezed it.

•His hands trailed up underneath your shirt to grope your breasts underneath your bra. Then, you know what happened next.

Ran:

•You are not too much of a jealous girlfriend, but you won’t deny you get a little jealous when you catch others looking at your boyfriend.

•You had joined Ran to a bar tonight for a business meeting, so of course you got dressed up in a dress that matched his suit. You had your makeup done up, some high heels on and you were looking breath taking.

•Half way through the night while Ran got up to order more drinks for your group. That is when you saw a woman talking to him, she was pretty, it was beginning to make you feel insecure.

•Ran is loyal and he didn’t even think she was attractive lmao, ever since you two started dating he thinks everyone else isn’t that good looking.

•Mature man, he likes to keep your relationship smooth so no arguments.

•He politely declined her offers before coming back to your table. This put you into an annoyed and anxious mood. You were quiet the rest of the night before it was time to leave. Once your company left, you were giving Ran the silent treatment.

•”Sweetie, you okay?” His smooth voice asked in concern, your bothered emotions clear to him. You ignored him before speaking a few moments later as you two left the bar. “So, what did that woman want?” You asked with a flare of sass.

•”Is this what you’re worried about?” He stopped in his tracks. “Honey, I told her I wasn’t interested and I have my own girlfriend I love very much. She doesn’t look as good as you-“

•”You’re mine! I don’t want to share you ever.” You snapped, his slightly annoyed him since he didn’t like attitude very much. “Babydoll, please calm down and watch your tone.” He warned.

•”So? Who gives a damn. I hate seeing other girls flirt with my boyfriend.” You sulked.

•”Enough.” He put his foot down and looked down at you. “Stop putting yourself in a position to feel so jealous. I don’t like seeing other men flirt with you but you are absolutely jaw dropping. There is no reason for you to be giving me attitude like this.”

•You were silent the way home once he drove you two home. You stormed off to take a shower, you began to cry to yourself in the shower. You regret having been to harsh. Your boyfriend Ran Haitani was so lovely and didn’t deserve that. You shouldn’t feel so insecure in your relationship anyway.

•Once you got out of the shower, you got dressed in plain black panties and an oversized shirt before combing your wet hair and finding Ran in the living room. He was in the dark watching TV, you looked at him, you two made eye contact before you turned away.

•”C’mere (Nickname).” He called out.

•Once sitting with him on the couch you apologized “I’m sorry for being rude and snapping at you. I’ll try not to put myself down so much, I trust you.” You apologized with a sniffle. “That’s my girl. It’s alright. I love you.”

•”I love you too.”

•An hour of cuddling later turned into Ran eating you out, reminding you how much he loves you. Before he turned you over doggystyle to pound your tight pussy, cumming inside of you and marking you as his.

Rindou:

•You and Rindou fought about a guy looking at you the wrong way. Rindou was protective over his girl like most dudes and wanted everyone to know, they need to keep their eyes off of you

•You two sometimes argue over what to eat but it is cute.

•You were annoyed and puzzled as to why he told a guy to “fuck off” just because he was checking you out which you didn’t realize. “Rindou, it’s not a big deal just calm down babe!”

•But he wasn’t having any of that. You two were now at home and he glared at you. “That dude was looking at you the wrong way, I had to let him know of his place.”

•”Ah…Okay, I understand.” You sighed just complying with him. If that’s how he was going to act, then so be it. You just accepted it. “Is there anything I can do to make it better?” You asked tilting your head innocently.

•That’s when he gave you the most dirty smirk you’ve ever seen. “How about you suck me off right here, right now, angel.”

•To say less, Rindou easily felt back to his usual self again once you have him an incredible blowjob and got to see his cum all over your pretty face.

Sanzu:

•Sometimes you and your boyfriend, Sanzu. Would argue over little things, this being one of them. He didn’t want you going out in that sexy and short sparkly dress he bought you. It was meant to be for his eyes only.

•He took things personally as he would stare violently and get aggressive with men who happened to gaze your way. Sanzu had no problem getting physical with someone else for the sake of you.

•”I can wear whatever I want.” “Yeah but I bought that for you, doll. I have some choice in the matter.”

•”Ah Sanzu, stop! You are so controlling, I’m a grown woman. I can wear what I want, most guys don’t go crazy over what their girlfriend chooses to wear and they trust her!”

•Sanzu stood over you and his eye twitched. “Is it so bad I care about you? There’s fucked up dudes out there who want to hurt you, I just want to protect you.”

•The two of you went back and fourth for awhile until you gave up. “I’m sorry, Sanzu.”

•”I’m sorry too… It’s fine if you want to wear it out, but I’ll be by your side the whole night not letting go.”

•You knew sometimes he was afraid of losing you. His arms reached out to hug you as you hugged him back. “It’s good we sort this out, it’s never good to go to bed feeling anxious and unresolved. I love you.” You told him.

•”I love you too baby, so very much.”

•You looked up into his charming eyes, he gazed down lovingly. “You are my world.”

[ilongfor-the-arts]

Can I pls request Kirk Hammett smut. Any kind

hey!! :)

I fucking love ur work on here and I saw ur request s we’re open. I was wondering if u could write more Kirk fics? preferably smut circa ‘83 lol

It’s Raining, It’s Pouring

Pairing: Kirk Hammett x fem! Reader

Warnings: language, smut, oral (m! Receiving), unprotected sex, overstimulation

Summary: You never thought you’d fall for the one man who has had your back since day one.

Word Count: 6k

Request?: Yes! (I got two requests for more Kirk)

Taglist: @theweightofstardust

“You can’t fire me! I didn’t do anything wrong!”

“You’re just not good enough honey… if you wanna run with Metallica you gotta be ready to go the extra mile… and frankly, you didn’t do nearly enough to prove yourself useful.”

I rolled my eyes at the ridiculousness of his statement.

“I haven’t done enough?!”

I pointed a finger at my chest.

“Not only have I taken pictures for you for way less than I’m worth… I’ve done almost any job you’ve asked me to do without complaining which, may I say, is very hard to do.”

Metallica's manager despised me with a vengeance. I would have been fired a long time ago if it hadn't been for my friendship with the bandmates. I enjoy my job and have worked hard to keep it, but it's difficult to do well in the workplace when their manager is staring daggers into my back the entire time, waiting for me to make one minor error.

He waved me away nonchalantly.

“Just get outta here peacefully before I call security, okay?”

He said, not even bothering to make eye contact with me.

I groaned, but turned and walked away calmly, knowing I'd be back soon after informing the boys that their manager had fired their closest companion.

The show had just ended, and thousands of people were rushing to the exit, practically climbing on top of one another to avoid the inevitable post-show traffic jam.

I sat patiently in the back of the crowd, not in a rush because I had no intentions of leaving anytime soon. I let everyone who appeared to be in a hurry pass me.

What I really wanted was for everyone to clear out of the stadium so I could have a one-on-one conversation with Metallica and request to be rehired. Without a doubt, I'd regain my job. The boys treated me as if I were one of them, and they wanted me to be a part of their team as much as I wanted to be a part of theirs.

After many minutes of being pushed and shoved around, I made my way to the stadium's back door, where I knew Metallica would be coming once they had finished packing up their belongings.

I sat patiently, the cool summer air providing the ideal setting to sit and enjoy the night.

Metallica could be heard for miles. When I heard them talking about how good they did and how they were going to blow the roof off the next show, I knew they were on their way to the back parking lot.

I quietly laughed to myself. They were out of control.

This was the moment I had been anticipating for the past half hour. When one of them asked what I was doing out here, I’d tell them I came to say goodbye because their manager had just fired me. They'd be resentful and would undoubtedly seek him out to give him a piece of their mind.

James slammed through the back door, nearly knocking it off its hinges.

“We're the best band in the whole goddamn world!”

They all agreed instantly, being loud and proud of themselves before Kirk noticed me sitting on the curb, staring at them intently.

“Hey Y/N… what’s goin’ on?”

He inquired, his goofy smile plastered on his ridiculously cute face.

The rest of the band joined in on the greetings.

I shrugged, brushing imaginary dust specks off my leather pants and pushing myself to a standing position.

“Nothing… just coming to say goodbye.”

I said it casually, as if there was a perfectly logical and obvious reason why I was biding my farewells.

One by one, puzzled expressions appeared on their faces. They cocked their brows or tilted their heads to the side to show their confusion.

“Huh?!”

James exclaimed.

“What do you mean goodbye?”

Kirk asked.

I scoffed.

“I mean… your boss just fired me and told me to leave. So… that’s what I’m doing.”

Their expressions shifted from bemusement to mild rage. Their brows furrowed and their teeth were clenched, the muscles in their jaws protruding from their cheeks.

“No way!”

“That’s not right!”

“Where is he?! We gotta talk to him!”

James charged towards the back door, his heavy boots thudding against the solid concrete. He had the look of a general leading his troops into battle, ready to fight for what they believed was right.

Kirk stepped away from the crowd for a moment to face me, his hands tenderly placed on my shoulders.

“We’ll get this figured out, okay?... you’ll be back working with us in no time.”

I smiled despite his worried expression.

“I know you guys will put in a good word for me…”

I ruffled his hair playfully, and he scrunched his face in mock disgust.

“I’ll see you later Y/N.”

“See ya later Mr. Hammett.”

He flawed me a smirk one last time before turning to follow his troops into battle, his hands deep inside the pockets of his worn leather jacket.

There had been rumors in magazines and newspapers about a possible romance between Metallica's guitarist and their devoted photographer.

We just laughed at their wild antics, not paying attention to their ridiculous assumptions.

I'd known Kirk Hammett since I started photographing bands. They were the first band to hire little old me, and I gratefully accepted.

Kirk was the main reason I was able to get a job. Despite the fact that I had never spoken to him, he managed to persuade everyone that I would be a good fit.

I’ll be honest, I have no idea how he did it.

Not even five minutes later, the band threw open the back door again. I swear I heard one of the screws pop out of the door and land on the concrete this time.

With a joyful smile on his face, James extended his hand to me in an overly formal manner.

“Welcome to Metallica Mrs. Y/N.”

I bowed my head, smiling, before taking his hand in mine, our arms flailing around clumsily as we exchanged handshakes.

“You won’t regret hiring me Mr. Hetfield… I can assure you I will be a valuable asset to the workplace.”

We spoke sarcastically, treating this ordeal as a joke because we both knew that with Metallica on my side, I'd be able to reclaim my job with ease.

“You want me to drive you home Y/N?”

Kirk asked, chiming into the conversation.

“Sure… let’s take a ride.”

I agreed before bidding my goodbyes to the band and following Kirk through the dark parking lot to his car.

It began to rain just as Kirk and I were getting settled inside his luxurious car, the plush leather seats hugging my body.

“Let’s hope the storm can hold off… I hate driving in the rain… you can’t see shit.”

“Yeah… I’d hate to have you driving home in the rain.”

Unfortunately, the rain did not hold off. It was pouring by the time we got halfway to my house. By the time Kirk pulled into my driveway, the road ahead of us was obscured by the haze of rain pelting down on the car.

It sounded like golf balls slamming into the car at 60 miles per hour. The force was intense, and I was afraid that a large water droplet would rip a hole in his front windshield.

“Well… this certainly isn’t good.”

I scoffed.

“Yeah no shit.”

“I should be okay… I’ll just take the back roads where no one drives.”

I violently shook my head from side to side.

“No way. The road’s invisible! You’ll crash!”

I extended my arm in front of him, demonstrating how little could be seen through the rainy haze.

“Well… what do you suggest I do?”

He inquired, swiveling his head to meet my concern.

I shrugged.

“You could stay here tonight… I just got a new couch.”

Kirk rolled his eyes.

“Don’t take this the wrong way… but I don’t want to sleep on your couch.”

I sighed and made an annoyed face at him.

“Well then I’ll take the couch and you can take the bed… I really don’t care but I don’t want you driving home when you can’t even see a foot in front of you.”

Kirk faced forward, biting his bottom lip and mulling over my request. The rain clapped against the metal like thunder, roaring loudly and drowning out our conversation to the point where we had to raise our voices to be heard.

“Kirk… you drive bad enough when you can see… Imagine how dysfunctional you’d be if you were blinded.”

Kirk paused before concluding that I was correct. He sighed and yanked the keys from the ignition.

“Fine… you win.”

Sarcastically, I batted my eyelashes.

“Thank you so very much.”

Kirk rolled his eyes, mockingly irritated.

“Sure… whatever makes you happy sweetheart.”

We stepped out of the vehicle and were soaked to the bone in seconds. Both of us bolted up my front lawn. When I was getting pelted by water droplets that stung when they hit my skin, the path from his car to my front door seemed to take an eternity.

I fumbled with my keys and nearly dropped them once we reached my front door.

“Y/N! Open the door already!”

Kirk yelled directly into my ear because I wouldn't be able to hear him over the rain if he was any farther away.

“I’m trying!”

I fumbled, the key striking every surface around the lock rather than going inside.

After what seemed like minutes of struggle, I was able to easily slide the key into the lock.

“Yes!”

I exclaimed in delight, throwing the door open with such force that it smacked against the wall with a loud thud.

I was expecting a warm night, so I set my thermostat to a low setting so when I walked through the door, it would be a breath of cool, fresh air.

Instead, every single droplet of water that touched my skin and clothes froze. As I lost feeling in my hands and feet, goosebumps appeared on my skin and my teeth began to chatter.

“Y/N, are you tryna kill me?”

Kirk's lips were a pale blue as he hugged himself to retain his body heat. His usual curly hair was soaked and stuck to his temples. The water droplets on his tanned skin glistened in the dim white light of my house.

His knees were trembling with cold as I dashed over to the thermostat to crank up the heat so neither of us would succumb to a severe case of hypothermia.

“Better?”

I inquired after the thermostat had been set to a reasonable temperature.

I faced Kirk, whose teeth were barred to prevent the irritating chattering of bone against bone.

“I’ll be better once it actually gets warm.”

Despite my house being only one level, it would take some time for the heat to dissipate through the air.

“Sorry… I was expecting it to be warmer.”

“Can I use your shower?”

“Sure… if you want an extra shirt I have some oversized ones that should fit you… take whatever you want.”

I didn't bother showing Kirk where anything was located. He'd been to my house several times and knew where everything was situated better than I did.

He nodded, the light washing over him and causing the dark areas of his face to glisten in the ambient lighting.

I sat on the couch, hanging off the edge so the cushions wouldn’t get wet. I twiddled my thumbs as I waited for him to finish with the shower. I stared at the wall, my eyes following every minor crack and imperfection.

If I wasn't drenched, I'd wrap a blanket around my shivering body.

I bobbed my head to the beat of one of Metallica's songs that had been stuck in my head for over a week, humming loudly.

I heard the shower turn on, and the water began to splash against the acrylic.

The sounds of roaring thunder and water smacking against the shower reverberated throughout my house and violently shook the walls.

If I had been alone, I would have been terrified of the deafening noises that threatened to rip my house apart piece by piece.

I reflected on how much I despised their manager. I reflected on the show. I recalled James's fantastic vocals and Kirk's incredible guitar work. Lars' drums came to mind as well.

Kirk was fantastic tonight; he really knew how to work a crowd, as well as a guitar.

Kirk Hammett.

I like his hairstyle. He has amazing curls.

I like the way he plays... He has good fingers for playing the guitar. They were long and agile.

Ah, I almost forgot he was taking a shower. I was distracted by the sounds of thunder and pelting rain to hear the water smacking against the acrylic shower.

He’s probably washing his hair now… I wonder if it’d smell like lavender from using my shampoo.

I know he likes his showers hot… The room is probably full of steam.

He’s got water traveling down his chest to his…

“Oh… Oh god…”

I cupped my hands around my face.

“I don’t like how my mind went there…”

I mumbled to my palms, not raising my voice above a whisper for fear that Kirk would somehow overhear me discussing how my filthy mind had thought something it should not have been thinking.

I was quite literally just thinking about my best friend’s dick. My best friend, who has always had my back since day one. My best friend, who has always stood by my side and believed in me even when I didn't believe in myself. My best friend, who has always been there for me in times of need.

But then I remembered something I'd heard years ago. Something along the lines of "when you meet your soulmate, you will feel completely at ease in their presence."

Maybe, just maybe, Kirk Hammett is the man I've been looking for my entire life.

No way, no how. I'm thinking ridiculously. I had an intrusive thought. A completely wrong, intrusive thought with no emotion behind it.

I didn't even notice the sounds of the shower stopping due to the pounding of rain on my roof and windows.

“Y/N… you okay?”

Fuck.

My gaze shifted from the darkness of my palms to Kirk, who stood on the threshold leading to my bedroom. He was standing at an angle, his shoulder pressed to the doorframe and his arms crossed over his chest.

Kirk was completely naked, with only a white towel wrapped around his waist keeping me from seeing everything. And it was difficult for me to concentrate on his eyes when the towel kept falling down his hips with every minor movement of his body.

“Yeah… I’m okay.”

My face was unmistakably beet red. I could feel the heat of a blush on my cheeks, and I could sense thin droplets of sweat on my upper lip.

“Just… tired.”

Despite the fact I was completely uncomfortable, I forced a smile. There were butterflies fluttering around my insides, as well as a feeling of unwelcome desire bubbling in the pit of my stomach.

The combination of all of the horrible lustful emotions made the entire situation extremely uncomfortable.

“Okay…”

Kirk didn't believe me when I said there was nothing wrong. He had an unsure expression on his face, one of his brows slightly cocked.

I'd seen him without a shirt before. But, oh my goodness, this was so different. He was standing in my living room, so close to me, in such an intimate setting where it was easy to feel the electricity humming through the air.

Kirk let out a deep sigh, the towel dripping lower to reveal his well-defined hip bones.

The universe was not assisting me in overcoming my newfound desires.

“Well… I’m done with the shower if you wanna use it.”

He pointed his finger over his shoulder, in the direction of the shower. The steam was drifting through the air and into the living room, giving the impression that Kirk was an angel emerging from a cloud of smoke.

He resembled a magazine cover model.

“Um…”

I was worried about what would happen if I was locked in a private room. I feared where my mind would go once I was alone.

“I think… I’ll just change clothes.”

“Are you sure?”

He asked, unsure.

“Yes… I’m sure.”

I stood, trying not to wobble and fall flat on my face.

Kirk moved out of the way to make room for me. I strolled past him with my head down and my eyes fixed on the ground, not meeting his gaze in fear I wouldn’t be able to resist the urge to press my lips to his.

I caught a whiff of his scent as I moved past him. He had used my shampoo, and he smelled like lavender.

Fuck.

I gently closed the door behind me, making sure to hear the lock slide into place so the door didn't remain ajar, leaving me exposed to Kirk, who would be able to oversee me as I mulled over my thoughts.

“Oh shit…”

Kirk says, his voice muffled by the door placed between us.

“Hey Y/N! Could you pass me my clothes?! There on the floor in the bathroom!”

He raised his voice above his normal tone so I could hear what he was saying over both the rain and the slab of wood.

“Yes!”

I felt like a pervert guy who climbed into a random girls house to steal her underwear as I retrieved his soaking wet clothes from the bathroom.

Touching his boxers sure as hell did not help my dire situation.

Either the universe was sending me signs, or it truly wanted me to suffer.

“Here you go!”

I gently opened the door, holding his drenched clothing between two fingers. He snatched them from my grasp and draped them over his forearm like a waiter with a fine napkin.

“Thanks gorgeous… I would’ve got them myself but I didn’t know if you were naked or not.”

With a smirk and a wink, he said.

He was acting silly, as he often did when I was around.

But, oh my goodness, it did nothing to help the thousands of thoughts that were racing through my head at the time.

The light streaming in through the slightly ajar bedroom door caused his face to glisten and shine from the moisture that had seeped into his skin. He appeared revitalized, young and free, and undeniably beautiful.

His sly grin had evolved into his iconic endearing smile, which I had grown to adore over the years I had known him. It never failed to make my heart sing with joy.

Kirk was accustomed to witty retorts in response to his mock flirting, complete with a sarcastic bat of my eyelashes.

His joy was short-lived when he noticed I was staring into his eyes, my face blank.

“Y/N what’s going on?”

He was worried, and rightly so. His best friend was acting strangely, with no logical explanation.

I sighed.

“Kirk…”

I stepped through the threshold, closing the door behind me until the click of the lock was barely audible above the thunderous rain.

I leaned against the door, pressing my shoulder blades against it for support so my legs didn't buckle and cause me to collapse.

“Have you ever…”

For a brief moment, I made eye contact with him, but his gaze crushed me. So I shifted my eyes to the floor beneath me.

I must have appeared pitiful. But I didn't care how he perceived me as long as I said what I needed to say.

“I don’t know…”

This was far more difficult than I anticipated.

“Thought about… you and me?”

I was mumbling, and Kirk couldn't hear me over the din of the storm.

“Sorry… what did you say?”

He took a step forward, leaning into me in hopes of hearing me better. Unfortunately, this only added to my unease.

My breath caught in my throat as I caught a second whiff of his hair, and my stomach flipped upside down. Instead of fluttering peacefully without a care in the world, the butterflies were now pounding against the inside of my stomach.

I felt stomach acid stinging my esophagus.

I wanted to bend over and throw up just to feel relief from the unease.

“Y/N… hey, look at me please.”

He spoke softly, as if he were a grown man trying to comfort a scared puppy.

I didn't want to look him in the eyes. To avoid the problem at hand, I wanted to turn around and slam the door behind me, then lock it so no one could speak to me for the rest of the night.

Kirk cupped my cheek gently, bringing my face up so that my eyes met his against my will.

“Kirk… please don’t touch me.”

I spoke while my tongue was not connected to my brain.

It sounded wrong... terribly wrong. I didn't mean it to sound that way.

Kirk recoiled, allowing his hand to fall to his side in defeat as his expression shifted from concern to pain.

His brows, which had been furrowed with concern, now stood limp as his eyes fell with sadness. I'd hurt him, and the warm glimmer of light in his lovely irises had been crushed under my foot.

“Sorry…”

He spoke quietly, his voice barely above a whisper. If I couldn't read his lips due to our close proximity, I wouldn't be able to hear him over the raging storm outside.

“No, no… please don’t be sorry I didn’t mean to say… er- I didn’t mean to sound like that…”

At this point, I was rambling. I'd gone from a shy girl trying to ease into a sensual conversation to a rambling mess of a human.

I cut myself off before I dug a deeper hole for myself.

Okay, it was now or never. I’d already ruined the beginning of the conversation, so it was time to cut to the chase.

“Kirk…”

I took a deep breath, allowing my lungs to fill with the soothing oxygen I had been deprived of for the past few minutes.

I stood tall instead of slouching against a door, and I relaxed, doing my best to quell the nausea which was now simmering inside my stomach

Our chests were almost pressed flush together due to my now confident posture.

It was Kirk's turn to blush.

The energy in the room shifted from nervous to confident and anticipatory. There was something in the air, something sensual.

My only concern was that Kirk would reject my advances.

If we tried and things didn't work out, we'd have a serious talk about it and try our hardest to get past this inconvenience.

We’d dealt with worse things than a failed kiss.

You only live once, right?

“Can I kiss you?”

I placed my open palms on his bare chest, feeling his heartbeat rattling around his rib cage like a cheetah running in the wild. At least I knew I wasn't the only one who was nervous.

Kirk gulped.

Please say yes.

Please say yes.

“Okay-”

I pressed my lips to his as soon as I had his permission.

Everything was slow at first, and I was almost certain this would fail, leaving us with the awkward aftermath of a failed advance.

Kirk then moaned into my mouth, the vibrations rattling my teeth and throat.

That's when I realized he was just as invested in making this work as me.

I wrapped my arms around his neck and slid my tongue between his teeth to intensify the kiss. He followed my lead, his arms encircling my waist.

Kirk sighed deeply into my mouth, pushing me back until my shoulder blades slammed into the door, rattling it inside its frame.

His lips felt like two clouds, soft and supple and easily meshing against mine. He was a fantastic kisser, even better than I could have imagined in my wildest fantasies. My mind was now walking through the gates and into the land of angels.

I had ascended to the heavens.

I'd never been happier in my entire life. Every decision I'd made in my life had led up to this point. This substantial moment would change my life forever, for better or for worse.

He was beginning to harden through the thin towel, his cock pressing firm against my stomach.

After exposing him to minutes of torture, getting him worried about what I wanted and debating whether or not he had done something wrong, I needed to repay him.

The towel was hanging on by a thread, the base of his cock practically exposed.

I trailed my soft fingertips down his chest, feeling goosebumps rise under my touch as I traced the plane of his slightly toned chest. The muscles in his abdomen flexed in anticipation when I reached the skin just above his cock.

“You don’t have to-”

I cut him off, pushing the towel to the floor and wrapping my hand around the base of his semi hard dick.

Kirk moaned loudly, throwing his head back in pleasure. His noises were music to my ears, adding to the wetness that was beginning to pool in my panties.

As my kneecaps made contact with the hardwood, a soft thud resounded throughout the silent room.

I was now eye level with his thick cock, beads of precum covering his swollen tip, my mouth watering with delight at the thought of tasting him.

Kirk gently threaded his large hand through my hair, simply for leverage rather than to exert force over me.

“Whenever you’re done gawking at my cock could you please suck it?”

There he was, the jovial and playful Kirk I'd grown accustomed to. He was staring down at me, his dark, thick hair almost completely covering his face. I rolled my eyes, staring at him through my lashes, but didn't bother responding.

Instead, I took his cock into my mouth, my hands wrapped around his thighs for leverage.

Kirk dropped his jaw, a choked moan erupting from his throat as he threw his head back, exposing his neck.

His hand tightened in my hair, pulling the strands from my scalp. The glorious pain travelled from my scalp to my lower stomach, igniting a fire within my abdomen.

“Fuck…”

He mumbled breathily.

I took him in my mouth, little by little until his tip was hitting the back of my throat.

“God… I’ve thought about this for a while.”

He lowered his head until his chin was pressed against his chest, his gaze burning into the top of my head.

He'd been thinking about it for a while?

That statement just made me even more antsy to have his cock buried inside of me.

The vein located on the underside of his cock began to bulge against my tongue as I continued to bob my head along his thick length.

His deep desire for me made my pussy ache for him, forcing me to rub my thighs together in hopes of gaining pleasurable friction.

It assisted in easing the pain temporarily, causing me to moan around his length.

Kirk whined as the vibrations added to his pleasure.

“Don’t stop… I wanna cum in your mouth…”

I sped up, my nose lightly brushing against his pubic bone every time I reached the base of his length.

Kirk sighed deeply.

“That feels so good… so fucking good…”

His cock began to twitch in my mouth, the bulging vein growing more desperate for release.

I moaned around him once more, helping Kirk release his cum into the back of my throat.

His chest heaved as he came, finally arriving at his much awaited orgasm

I swallowed his cum, releasing his cock from my mouth with a loud pop. Kirk’s thighs were trembling from post orgasmic haze.

I sat back on my heels, wiping any extra cum off my face with the back of my hand. It made me joyful to see just how much of an impact I could have on him.

Kirk untangled his fingers from my hair as he released his death grip on my scalp.

I rose to my feet, my knees trembling with excitement.

Kirk was in complete shambles. After our make out session, his lips were wet with saliva and plush. His upper lip and brow were covered in a thin layer of sweat. His bare chest swelled and fell with desire.

He smiled at me through heavy breaths, and I was quick to return his grin.

“That was really good…”

“Thank you…”

I approached him again, wrapping my arms around his shoulders gently.

I leaned into his ear and kissed the skin under his earlobe tenderly.

“Can I ride your cock Mr. Hammett?”

I mumbled, trying to put on the most sensual tone I could muster.

Kirk sighed, his cock already beginning to grow hard once more.

“Yes please…”

He murmured, practically begging.

I reached behind me, unlocked the door, and pushed it open, the hinges squeaking with excitement.

I drew him back until my knees collided with the bed frame, causing me to lose my balance and fall back onto the mattress with a soft thud.

Kirk placed his hands next to my head and settled in between my legs, his knee brushing against my aching core.

I groaned, rolling my hips forward against his knee to ignite the pleasurable friction I craved.

Kirk could sense my desire. He reached in between our bodies and hooked a finger in the waistband of my pants.

Fortunately, the fabric was dry enough to easily slide down my legs. Kirk shifted his body until his knees were on either side of my thighs, allowing him to yank my pants all the way down to my calves.

I helped him out by kicking my clothes off my legs and onto the carpeted floor until I was left in my panties and a t- shirt.

Kirk shifted once more until his knee was mere inches from my aching core, his hands placed next to my head for leverage.

He rubbed his bare knee against my clothed pussy, eliciting a low moan from the back of my throat.

I grasped onto his thick curls to assist me in grinding against him.

“Fuck…”

I mumbled against his supple lips.

I was so horribly wet and aching for him.

So I took command, hooking my leg behind his torso and flipping him onto his back.

Kirk looked up at me with soft eyes and a few curls on his brow. He gently rested his hands on my hips as I removed my loose t-shirt and tossed it to the ground, hurrying to have him inside of me.

“Fuck… I should’ve taken these off before I got on top of you.”

I was still wearing my panties, unfortunately.

“I gotcha honey…”

Kirk grasped each side of my panties, tugging sharply. My heart skipped a beat as a result of a loud snap that came from him ripping the fabric. Kirk tore the leg holes so I was able to remove them without dismounting his torso.

I scoffed.

“You always were a fan of dramatic flares.”

I said, tossing the ripped piece of fabric to the ground.

Kirk moved his hands behind my back, unhooking my bra in one swift motion and tossing it to the floor with the rest of my forgotten clothes.

I grasped his semi hard cock, giving it a few pumps before lining him up with my entrance and sinking down onto his girth.

We both threw our heads back in unison. Kirk's dull nails dug into the flesh of my hips, igniting a pleasurable yet painful sensation in my lower abdomen, making me even more desperate to feel every inch of him.

Kirk’s thick girth stretched my walls until I feared I would split in two. I sunk down until there was no more of his glorious cock to feel inside of me.

“Fuck Kirk… you’re so big.”

I felt deliciously full, like when you're stuffed from dinner but still want dessert.

I leaned over his chest, placing my open palms against his legs and raising my hips before sinking back down slowly.

At first, I took my time, testing the waters rather than diving in head first. When I heard Kirk moaning, whining, and begging for me to give him more of me, I decided it was time to go all in.

“Y/N… please go faster… your pussy feels so good…”

I rolled my hips back and forth, his grasp becoming tighter on my hips with every rock of my pelvis.

I could feel Kirk's heartbeat racing through my palms. Every heave of his chest as he indulged himself in the lustful situation was palpable to me.

“God Y/N, you’re making me crazy.”

Through heavy sighs and moans, he struggled to speak.

His words went straight to my core, adding to the aching and burning desire I felt for him. The need to make both of us cum was now even more prevalent than before.

I wanted to cum more times than I could count on top of his thick cock. The way he stretched me, the way he filled me up until I swore I couldn’t take anymore drove me to the brink of insanity.

It was all good… so good… maybe even too good to be true.

But it was true, it was so true.

My thigh cramped unexpectedly, a sharp jolt of pain shooting up my leg, and not the pleasurable kind.

“Kirk… can you fuck me?”

“I’d love to… I wanna make you cum so hard you’ll be aching for me the next time you think about my cock inside your pretty little pussy.”

Kirk effortlessly flipped us both over. It was an easy transition that didn’t allow any of the passion to fizzle out and die.

He began to pound into me, his hips snapping forward and burying himself balls deep inside of me with every thrust.

I closed my eyes, savoring the incredible sensation of him taking control.

“Kirk!”

I exclaimed, tangling my fingers in his thick curls.

I wrapped my legs around his waist, the new angle allowing the tip of his cock to brush against my g spot with every harsh thrust.

I arched my back into him the second time his cock slammed into my g spot.

“Kirk… please keep going, you feel so good inside me.”

It was my turn to beg for him.

His curls brushed against my face and tickled my cheek as he buried his face in the crook of my neck. The scent of lavender drifted into my nose, making me fall into a sex filled haze.

“I love fucking you so much… I could fuck you all day.”

I dropped my jaw and let out a pornographic moan as his cock began to slam into my g spot at a more rapid pace.

My orgasm came unexpectedly. It only took one hard thrust to have my toppling over the edge with a loud howl of pleasure. Kirk began to slow down, but I couldn’t let this end, not yet.

“No… no please keep going… I need to cum again… I want you so fucking bad.”

Kirk reached in between our bodies to run slow circles into my clit.

“Come on baby… cum for me again.”

He mumbled, his voice raspy and thick with desire.

It wasn’t long after that I was cumming even more violently on his cock. It was euphoric, my body was lifted from the earth and into the heavens. I could only think of the pleasure as my orgasm completely overcame me, making every nerve in my body tender.

This time, Kirk followed close behind, painting my walls with his warm cum.

He collapsed on top of me, pressing his entire body weight onto my torso.

I ran my fingers through his hair tenderly, brushing out the knots and pulling it out of his face. His cock remained inside of me as we both came down from our highs.

“I think I’m in love with you.”

Kirk’s eyes were shut as he spoke.

I placed a gentle kiss on his forehead.

“I think I’m in love with you as well.”

I agreed.

“The rain stopped…”

I'd just realized there was no longer a storm or any heavy rain. How long has it been silent for?

I chuckled.

“It was giving us the opportunity to fuck.”

In each other's presence, we both laughed, pure, happy laughter.

I didn’t regret having sex with Kirk Hammett.

[akkkkollle]

Ok, hear me out. You love angst? What about cheating? But not the reader being cheated on, but being the lover?! Like what about Draken - or anyone of your preferences - cheating on their SO with the reader and being caught by Emma (or anyone else). Do they stay together, does draken go with reader? As you want! Let's us be the "bad guys" for once 👾

Thanks in advance and I wish you a good day!

Pairing: Takemichi × M!Reader.

Cw: marking, pleading, cheating, the future, if Takemichi had saved a better future instead of running to save Mikey, jealousy.

— Sorry, I can't imagine Draken as a traitor, but Takemichi... Enjoy it!

- M-m/n, Hina will be coming soon... Stop it, please. - he whispers, grabbing you by the shoulders and trying to push you away.

-Didn't you beg me to fuck you yourself, huh? - his cheeks turn red, but he nods and then tries to push you away again.

- But not here, if she finds out... - here you couldn't stand it anymore and knocked on the wall next to him, which made him flinch.

- What then? Did you save her? Yes! You don't love her, it's just an attachment that you have, but you've done your duty, why the hell are you still with her? - his head is lowered, listening to your accusations.

- I feel sorry for her, M/n... She'll be upset. - you click, grabbing your jacket, which you threw on the sofa and headed for the door. - Wait! Where are you...?

- It's either me or her, Take, decide. - his eyes widen, and then he blushes even more and comes up to you, kissing you.

After a while.

- S-slow down! Too deep, M-m/n! - there is a high moan mixed with a sob.

- Come on, you like it, handsome. You suck me deeper yourself. - he swallows, his cheeks turning even redder.

His arms wrap around your shoulders as you bump into him harder. His nails leave red stripes on your skin while you bite his neck and sigh slightly, seeing not your hickeys, but hers. So you just start biting his whole neck, covering them with hickeys and bites, knowing that he will break up with her and nothing will happen to you.

Quiet singing can be heard in the hallway when the girl takes off her uncomfortable shoes after work. She sees her husband's jacket and a joyful rumbling breaks from her lips, and then she sees your jacket lying on the couch. She frowns and carefully hangs it on the hanger, quietly snorting at your carelessness. She walks down the corridor between the rooms, trying to figure out where you are. And now she hears some sounds from the bedroom and Hinata opens the door with a joyful smile, which immediately turns into a surprised movement.

The brunette's cheeks turn even redder and he whispers to you to stop. You just stare at the door in disbelief, and then look there in surprise. You see how tears accumulate in Hina's tears, so you just get out of Takemichi and pull on your pants.

- How could you both...? - she whispers and mascara flows down her cheeks. - You are...

- Come on, Michi, tell her. - you say, forcing Hina to look at him.

- Ah... uh... Well, I... I didn't mean to... - you just stare at him menacingly. - What...?

- What?! Are you fucking serious? You said you'd break up with her in a few minutes! Yes, you... - you just click and leave the room, forcing Takemichi, even naked, to run after you.

Hina closes the door, still in shock, looking at the bed. She would never have thought that Takemichi's best friend, as he introduced you, would turn out to be his lover. She angrily grabbed the first suitcase she came across and starts throwing all her ex-husband's things there. Heavy tears fell from her eyes, which fell on clothes and other things.

- M-m/n, stop! Please! - he shouts, clinging to your leg, not letting you go.

- What do you want?! You chose her! So stay behind with her, I don't intend to be lovers all my life! - he cried even harder, raising his face to you, causing you some pity, so you stopped.

- I-I'll leave her, honestly! I'll be with you, honestly, M/n! Just please... Don't leave, I love you... - you exhale, looking at the wall and you are distracted by a suitcase that flies into your leg, and Takemichi into his head.

- Get out of here! - her tears literally flowed in streams. - I will file the divorce papers myself, happiness to you!

She runs into the room. You kneel down next to Takemichi, who is rubbing his head. You examine his head, seeing the bruise and kissing him. He sobs, looking at you. You open the suitcase and grab the first things you come across, giving it to him.

- Come on, Takemichi, we're starting a new life. - he smiles softly, hugging you and kissing you on the cheek.

[chuckbass-love]

can you do fem readerxchris where chris is her dads best friend the reader is in her 20s with an older chris with age,size,degradation dd/lg maybe

A/N: Okay but like, why is this a big fantasy of mine. Aside from the man being my dad’s best friend but the older guy trope, and the forbidden shit too? It’s my jam. I really hope you love what i’ve done with this despite the fact that i didn’t use the age or dd/lg stuff. I could only really use the size and degradation kinks. I did my best though, i hope it suffices.

Disclaimer: My work is not to be translated or to be posted anywhere else other than MY Tumblr, Wattpad and Ao3 without my permission. However, reblogs are welcome.

Summary: For so long you've struggled around your dad's best friend Chris. He's everything you've been searching for in a man since guys your age are way too immature. So what will happen when the opportunity to make a move on Chris, presents itself?

Warnings: Smut, slow burn (sorta), oral (f and m receiving), vaginal fingering, protected sex, dirty talk, size kink, slight degradation if you squint and language. 18+ as per, you know the drill.

Word Count: 17,033

GIF NOT MINE!!! Credit to @charllehunnam go check them out🤍

Guys Your Age

For practically your entire life, you’ve been surrounded by adults. From teachers to your parents and even to friends of your parent’s. You never really hung out with kids your own age until school, and that’s probably why you developed quicker than other kids regarding talking and walking, you know, all of the firsts. And even as you entered your teenage years, that continued. You were the first out of all of your friends to get your period, the first to really develop breasts which certainly didn’t go unnoticed with the guys at your school. 

However, they weren’t the guys for you so you continued to go through your high school years paying their childish and fuck boy style remarks no mind. 

As you got older, you soon learnt that you had preferences, especially when it came to guys or should you say...men. 

But even more specifically, a man... your dads best friend, Chris Evans.

You first met Chris around the time of your 16th birthday, or at least that’s the first time you distinctly recall seeing his face, your dad had invited him as he was an old buddy of his from his wild college days and you can recall the moment you laid your eyes upon him. 

All of your friends were practically foaming at the mouth at the mere sight of such a tall and handsome man in such a dashing suit. His biceps were barely contained in that crisp white dress shirt of his that even you were starting to drool.

When it came to your dad introducing the two of you, Chris just sighed, smiled and turned to your dad “i can’t believe you’re a dad, man” you giggled as you shook his hand.

“You know, your dad used to be quite the wild party animal back in our day” Chris chuckled before his eyes met yours and in that moment, you knew you were fucked.

His beautiful blue orbs pierced into your soul and from then on, you looked forward to looking into them. 

It was as though your whole life you had breezed by with no rhyme or reason behind your reluctance for guys your own age, but the moment you met Chris, it all became clear. You could never quite connect with the boys at school or college. But with Chris, it was so simple. You adored the way he spoke, with such intelligence that still to this day remains unmatched. Guys your age don’t know how to how to hold a mature conversation the way that Chris does.

Everything added up, the list of pro’s for Chris built up until it was ridiculously embarrassing on your part. You began to realise that you were holding yourself back from meeting anyone else because you were hell bent on saving yourself for a man that would only ever see you as his best friend’s daughter.

It was always only ever going to be platonic, and deep down, you knew that too. The pining had to end, you had to snap out of your daydreams and open yourself up to someone more reachable. 

So that’s what you did. You learnt to let Chris go, to let your crush go, or at least prevent it from teetering on the edge of obsessive.

But even you can admit that there were always going to be tiny fragments of him in the back of your mind, forever lingering. The first real crush is always the hardest to kick. And you’ve learnt that the hard way.

Now fast forward to the present and your 21st birthday plans are well under way and almost complete. Your girls have kept every detail under lock and key, insisting that you’re in a dire need of letting your hair down, some proper girlfriend time.

With all of the pressure of your internship at the local newspaper as well as your intense family life, it’s a lot to keep on top of. So it’s a must.

Your parents, much to your dismay, have coerced you into joining them at a local gathering at a friend’s house. Unfortunately the name of the host completely went over your head, since they chose to disclose that detail when waking you up this morning. 

As much as you groaned and dug your heels in though, you still found yourself getting up and ready for the long and no doubt boring day ahead. Brunch at a strangers house, why do your parent’s have to be so social and in with everyone in this dam town?

Just for once you’d like to go grocery shopping with your mom without others interrupting your day, it would result in things getting done a lot quicker. But things will never change, so suffer you shall. 

“Do we have to go to this? I have plans tonight with the girls. You know for my birthday, i need time to get ready” you complain, sarcastically asking them as if they’d ever forget that your birthday is tomorrow, after all you are turning 21 and it’s not every day that you reach that age. If you don’t treasure this moment, you’ll blink and it’ll be gone.

“Yes, Y/N. We’ve been invited and you will come because it’s polite” your mom lectures from the passenger seat of the car before facing forward. Your dad however, just focuses on the road, ignoring the two of you. 

The drive over to this friends house seems to take forever as you watch the many familiar houses pass by from your window, bored out of your mind. You pray that your phone battery lasts so that you can pass the time away on social media.

Multiple texts come through just as you arrive at the location, all of them from the group chat. Your friend Jackie sends in the time for tonight that they will arrive at yours and Payton confirms the dress code. This is very suspicious, and since you aren’t the most patient person, you’re struggling to play ball.

But you only have to wait until tonight to find out what they’ve had planned, so all in all, it’s not so bad.

Your dad knocks the door of the house and not even a beat later, it swings open to reveal a woman that you recognise but can’t quite put your finger on where you know her from.

She’s short with dark blonde/brown shoulder length hair and her eyes are sparkling with delight at the sight of guests. She seems sweet, so familiar.

“Gary, you came” she brings your dad into a big and tight hug before pulling away and glancing over at your mom. The two of them hug briefly before her eyes settle on you.

“Is this Y/N? She’s grown up so much” she steps out of the house to hug you too “i bet you don’t even remember me, do you?” you look around at your parents for help before shrugging.

“Thought so. Well i’m Lisa, i looked after your father during his college days, he practically lived here with my son Chris” 

Chris as in....

“Ma, where’s the beer?” the deep Bostonian accent calls out as Lisa ushers the three of you inside before closing the door and taking your coats. And you swear that you can feel all of the hairs on your body stand on end.

You’re wearing skinny black jeans with flats and a black and white cropped shirt with small purple butterflies on it, it’s casual enough but not too casual, so you still look well put together. Enough for your parents to get off your case that is.

As soon as he enters the room, you instantly look up, feeling his presence before actually seeing him for yourself. It’s like there’s always been this unknown pull that draws you toward him, something magnetic and invisible. You’ve never been able to figure it out but whatever it is, you don’t want it to fade.

Just like every time you see Chris, he looks so incredibly gorgeous. His brown hair swept back, a white shirt on underneath a red flannel. With blue jeans on to cover his long legs, you feel your eyes lingering on his body a beat more than necessary and normal. But you just can’t tear your eyes away. His body has always been a sight for sore eyes, and you can see that he’s still in super soldier shape. He’s so tall that you figure you’ll just always be intimidated by his size, the way he commands every room, the way he owns every room. You gulp rather loudly as he steps closer to you.

He makes it incredibly hard to avoid catching feelings.

For so long you tried your hardest to bury those same feelings, in hopes that your school girl crush would dissipate in no time but looking at him now, you know that it never really left. 

You just got better at forgetting and distracting yourself with your career definitely helped.

Chris greets your parents first, bringing them both into tight hugs, and judging by the way they interact, you can sense that they’ve missed one another. With his busy schedule and your dad always working himself, it’s not easy for them to keep up with seeing each other. If your dad is free, Chris is away in another country filming, and vice versa. So it’s nice to see how happy your dad gets during rare moments like this.

“Y/N” the tall and broad man greets, stepping closer to you. Everyone watches the exchange as you hug him, smiling ear to ear.

“Chris” you return, as you pull away and he pulls back to glance down at you, giving you a quick once over. The intimidation is stronger than ever as you squirm underneath his stare.

His eyes linger for a second longer on your chest. Sure you had boobs last time he saw you but they’ve grown even more so since then and your top reveals a healthy amount of cleavage for him to feast his eyes on. 

“You grow more and more every time i see you, i hear you’re turning 21 tomorrow” he says, clearing his throat, a genuine smile gracing his face as he steps back. You all follow as he walks into the grand kitchen. It’s a lot bigger than any you’ve seen before. There’s a wall to wall dining table in the centre and then a kitchen island close by with bar stools all around it. They must have plenty of these gatherings and one hell of a big family. 

Chris grabs a beer for himself, pulling the cap off before offering all of you a drink. You request a sprite, not wanting to set your parents off by asking for alcohol, despite you being 21 tomorrow, they’d never let you drink.

He pours your drink out, adding ice before sliding it over to you with a friendly smile, he shoots you a wink as his attention turns back to your parents. You proceed to sip the drink, finding yourself grinning again because of him.

That wink was most likely just him being nice, but in the back of your mind, you start to imagine how he must feel about you. Does he like you? No, of course he doesn’t, the chances of that actually being the case are a million to one but you still like to fantasise. And if you were to let a naked truth slip, it would be that you’d allow him to do anything to you that he wanted to and if you had the confidence to, there are a whole bunch of confessions you’d have for him.

However, since you don’t, you continue to sip your drink in between assisting Lisa with laying the table for the food. 

Every now and then you catch glimpses of Chris staring at you, his eyes trained on your body until he sees you looking back, that’s when he clears his throat before looking elsewhere. 

It’s probably just you hopelessly wishing here but it looked like he was checking you out. 

Waving that presumptuous thought away silently, you take your seat at the table next to Scott, Chris’s younger brother who looks a lot like him.

The two of you making conversation as you mindlessly dish some food up onto your plates, Lisa really went all out with this food and everything looks so good that you just know you’ll be getting second helpings of pretty much everything.

Scott starts to ask about your internship that he heard about briefly from your parents so you decide to elaborate further for him. Writing has always been something you’ve excelled at and when an opportunity presented itself to do it for real, you’d have been a fool to turn it down. Instead, you grabbed a hold of it with both hands, refusing to let go.

Your boss Jasmine was very straight up from your very first day about a potential permanent career with them. She was insistent that it all depended on how you coped during a two year long internship. And you soon got the picture that the internship was merely a way for the newspaper to assess potential future employees. So far though, you already know that she’s proud of your work. Which is great and you feel very positive about your future. 

“So journalism, huh? Doesn’t that make you like super smart?” Chris calls from across the table, he’s sat directly opposite you and you smirk “i very much doubt that, i just enjoy writing” you answer, trying to remain modest, you never like to brag about your academic successes even though your parents sing your praises from the rooftops. 

“What she really means is, yes. We never had any issues with her during school, her grades remained consistent and high throughout and to cut a long story short, i’m a proud dad” your father flashes you a smile that screams love. 

Sure your parents are supportive and all and they love the bones of you, but sometimes you feel like they pushed you a little too hard during your school and college years. It helped you to get the internship, so of course you’re grateful but you missed out on a couple parties-or whatever it was your friends were getting up to-due to their schedule for you to complete homework. It all worked out alright in the end but still, it plays on your mind. 

It doesn’t make you love them any less though.

“Love you too dad” heat rushes up your neck and to your face as you feel everyone’s eyes on you, it only lasts a second before all of the little conversations around the table resume.

Chris shoots you another wink before looking back down at his food and you quickly scramble to distract yourself by eating too. 

Scott then gets onto the topic of boys, sharing with you all about his boyfriend, complete with pictures galore. The sight of him so loved up warms your heart and you hope that one day you’ll get to experience that. He briefly mentions how he couldn’t make it due to work obligations and you can sense that he wishes he was here.

You then begin to ask him all of the obligatory questions to which he responds in detail for you before flipping them onto you.

“So, how about you then?” he inquires, shoving some potatoes into his mouth and watching you intently. 

“What about me?” you decide to play dumb.

“Any guys on the scene? After all you are 21 soon so there has to be at least one boy that you like” in your peripheral you can see Chris’s eyes on you, burning a hole into your head, igniting a spark.

The 16 year old girl inside of you decides to take full advantage of his silent attention. 

“Well, there was one guy” you murmur, just loud enough for Chris to hear and as Scott leans in close to hear the details you tell him all about a guy at the newspaper, he’s a fellow intern too and his name is Max. He’s a couple of inches taller, jet black long hair that he ties up in a man bun, a couple of tattoos here and there on his arms and he’s constantly flirting with you whilst the two of you are seated at your desks. 

He’s the first guy close to your age that you’ve even given the time of day. He’s 24, you whisper that detail to Scott, telling him that you don’t want your parents to hear as they’ll more than likely flip their lid and go mental. 

Scott chuckles with you as he gives you some x rated advice on how you could flirt back. You quickly refuse, admitting that you’re far too shy to ever even attempt his suggestions.

Finally, everyone is full and sitting back in their chairs, absolutely stuffed full of Lisa’s incredible cooking. That woman knows how to feed, that’s for sure.

“Shall we start the clean up” she chirps, rising from her seat and glancing around at all of the satisfied people. It’s clear she gains a lot of happiness from cooking for people, she’s such a lovely woman. 

Chris looks around the table before his eyes settle back on you, he’s been trying his hardest all fucking day to keep from glancing your way but it’s impossible to avoid when you’re demanding to be looked at. 

It must be the aura circling you. Everything about you is so mature, your dress sense, the way you speak and carry yourself. It’s like he blinked and you went from that young and innocent girl to this. It’s taken him by complete surprise if he’s being honest. The majority of your features mirror your dads, with a hint of your mom in regards to your eyes and figure.

If there was any doubt about who’s daughter you were, your looks would always be a reminder. And it’s exactly that, that one reminder that he can never go near you. He shouldn’t want to anyway, what on earth has gotten into him?

Whatever it is, he needs to snap out of it. But an earlier conversation that he overheard unintentionally springs back into his mind, the one you had with Scott about boys. You mentioned about there being one guy but all he could hear was the detail about him being 24 and tall, oh and the fact that he also interns at the newspaper. 

And that makes total sense, that guy is closer to you in age and it works. It would be less of a questionable option for you.

Instead of allowing you to occupy his mind throughout the remainder of the day, Chris begins to help his mom clear up and load the dishwasher with the first lot of dishes. 

An hour passes with everyone in separate sections of the lounge, all of the conversations filling the room whilst you sit down on the armchair alone, taking this time to check your phone for messages from the girls. 

Layla is banging on about her outfit and how killer it is, whilst Claire is having boyfriend trouble...yet again. It’s no wonder she complains all of the time when her boyfriend Daniel is a complete and utter douche bag. He rarely makes an effort and even when he does, it never lasts long enough. Yourself and the rest of your friendship group have warned her enough times for her to know he’s no good but since it’s always seemed to fall on death ears, you now tolerate her whining every week. Yup, that’s how often they have one of their many domestics.

Before you can even register the time, a hand rests on your shoulder from behind and you turn to find your dad looking down at you.

“Ready to go?” you smile, nodding over excitedly. It’s not that you haven’t had fun because you have, but since you have mystery plans for tonight, you have to get ready earlier so you can schedule in a breakdown over what you’re going to wear.

The dress codes is sexy, so you’re already racking your brain with ideas of what outfit in your closet could go well with that. But then the real issue springs to mind, how on earth do you plan on sneaking past your folks in something sexy?

So you quickly pull out your phone to text the girls, asking if you’d be able to change at one of their houses as well as asking if you can stop over too, to avoid any commotion.

Jackie agrees for you to stay at hers, requesting that you have all your stuff ready for her to pick you up at 7:30pm. You thank her before putting your phone away and bidding everyone goodbye. 

Scott rushes to hug you, whispering a quick “get your man” in your ear before allowing Chris to hug you too. His hug lingers a little longer than necessary until Lisa nudges him out of the way.

You thank her for the food before leaving the house and getting into the back of your dads car.

Another encounter with Chris Evans and you’re still no closer to kicking this huge crush of yours, you have got to work on that.

By the time you get home from Lisa’s, you’re so antsy to start getting ready that you dart up the stairs in a hurry, needing to make a decision about your outfit now so that you have enough time to change your mind.

Your parents huff as you leave them standing in the doorway but you don’t have enough time to pay them any mind.

The second you get into your room, half of hour clothes are on the floor in what your mom likes to call a ‘floordrobe’, and every time she says it you laugh as though it’s the first joke you’ve heard her tell.

Dresses, jeans and tops galore all cover your carpet. Not one solid contender in sight.

A panicky text to Jackie prompts her to call you as you sit on your bed having your first mental breakdown.

“Hello” she says as you answer, hearing your mumbling.

“I don’t know what to wear because I have no clue where we are going” you exclaim, anxiety wracking your body. It might sound silly but you always get like this whenever you are about to be sociable, it’s hard for you to do so since you always panic about looking bad or making a fool of yourself. It’s hard to explain to people who don’t suffer with it. It’s like every possibility of what could go wrong fills you to the brim until you’re drowning in your own fears.

“Come on, don’t get worked up. You’ll be fine. Just pick a nice dress. Ooo, how about the red one with the spaghetti straps, that’s a nice one”

Her suggestion isn’t bad, in fact it’s the best dress you have, so truth be told, it’ll be the best option for you. She did say sexy and this dress is definitely sexy.

It’s a red silk dress that comes to your mid thighs, it hugs your curves beautifully, fitting your body like a second skin. The square neckline is perfect for showing off your best assets, your breasts and the straps are silver, spaghetti style.

You can even pair it with your silver lace up square toed heels! Okay that’s the outfit done. Now time for you to pack it away as well as gathering all of the makeup that you’re gonna need for tonight.

Once you complete the packing, you decide to head for a shower, washing your hair and body before wrapping a towel around you as you walk into your bedroom again to dry your hair.

6:00pm rolls around and you decide to go and have something to eat downstairs. Since you don’t know when the next time you’ll be able to eat will be, you want to be prepared. And everything is always better on a full stomach.

You take a seat at the dining room table and join in with whatever small talk that your parents are making, something about gardening. Not that you have any clue about it of course, but seeing as it’s the topic for now, you decide to ask your mom questions about her newly grown roses. She adores the garden, it’s her sanctuary and her pride and joy.

It’s at times like this when you truly realise what you have, a family that loves and cares for you. No matter what happens, you know you’ll always have a home here. Not everyone can say that.

So you take the silence in conversation to count your blessings.

Dinner is put away and more mindless conversation is made, you eventually stand up to help your mom clear the table and load the dishwasher.

Afterwards you head back up the stairs to retrieve your overnight bag before informing your parents that you’re staying at Jackie’s tonight. They shrug it off a little too quickly but that’s when they promise to call Jackie’s parents ahead of time.

Thankfully when they do, they get confirmation. By this point, her parents know the drill with your folks and the memo to always downplay everything. If they trust Jackie enough and they will be home to be of any help then they don’t mind telling a little white lie.

It’s now 7:30 and Jackie isn’t here yet so you sit on the stairs to do your shoelaces up whilst you you wait and one loud beep outside lets you know she’s just arrived. She always likes to make her presence known.

“Mom, dad, I’m going now” you call out, awaiting for them to rush out and a second later, they do, like clockwork, whenever you go out they always want to assess you before you leave. Protective isn’t the word.

You bid them goodbye with a hug, as well as a side of reassurance that you’re going to be safe at Jackie’s house. 

And on that note, you escape, rushing over to get into Jackie’s jeep. Her folks are loaded so she pretty much get’s everything handed to her. However, she’s not a typical rich kid, she doesn’t brag about her material things or her families wealth. Instead, she prefers to dial it down a lot of the time and being that you’re not exactly filthy rich, you appreciate her doing so. 

“So, what’s this surprise?” you pry as you buckle up, but much to your dismay, her face remains neutral, no sign of what she’s got planned. Not that you’re surprised, you still wanted to try though.

“Your parent’s rang mine again” her tone merely one of observation as her eyes remain focused on the road, and you know this is just a way of her distracting you.

She’s never gotten your parents and neither have your other friends, it’s annoying because you feel pitied a lot of the time. Even though they don’t do it on purpose.

“You know how they get Jac, i just can’t have them knowing about whatever it is that you’ve planned. They are way too protective. I mean i love them, and i appreciate everything they’ve done for me. But sometimes it feels like they don’t want me to have even an ounce of freedom or for me to ever grow up. I’m 21 tomorrow, i have an internship and they still insist on calling my friends parents for confirmation that i’ll be okay. It’s like they work themselves up with worry”

A nod from her in your peripheral vision lets you know she’s listening intently. You feel like a broken record. You’ve lost count of how many times she’s had to listen to this same rant. 

“I just think you need to sit them down” she pauses, using all of her concentration on parking the car in her drive before shutting the engine off and turning to you “if you don’t sit them down and talk to them, how do you expect things to change. Like you said, you’re 21 tomorrow. You need to have the chat sooner or later”

She’s right, you do need to talk to them. It’s a conversation that you’ve been putting off for quite some time now. 

However, that’s a worry for another time. For now though, you need to go and celebrate your birthday with your girls and forget all about the stress that plagues you day to day. 

Upon entering Jackie’s bedroom, you’re met with piles of clothes, make up and shoes. What on earth happened in here?

“What’s going on here?” you ask, setting your stuff down on the one empty space, the bed, before sitting down yourself. 

Jackie, Layla, Sophie, Claire and Payton all turn to you with huge grins plastered across their faces.

“So... we thought we’d celebrate in style tonight by taking you to Oblivion, it’s a new club in town and then, maybe Stu’s?” Payton wiggles her eyebrows at you, making you giggle before shaking your head at your crazy friends.

“It’s like you’re insinuating that i’m an alcoholic with all of these grown up locations” you feign offence before standing up and taking out your dress choice for the night to show them “but since you’d be right with that, how’s this dress?” 

The moment you hold it up against your body, they all gasp, uttering compliments on how amazing it will look on you. You then lay it down on the bed before settling in between Claire and Layla in front of the mirror on the floor, make up bag in your lap.

Since your dress is red, you decide a smokey eye will go great with it, as well as your red lipstick that you brought with you for tonight. 

When it comes to turning 21, you either have to go bold or go home. No room for casual or under dressing. You only turn 21 once.

And you’re not even surprised by the choice your friends made regarding plans. They know you love a good drink, besides, it’s been a long time since you all gathered like this for a night of debauchery.

With your makeup blended to perfection, you stand up, walking your leg cramp off before changing into your dress.

“Woah” Sophie fans you with her hands, whistling to signal your attractiveness. Once you turn to meet the mirror, you see it. 

There’s a reason behind you not wearing a whole load of make up every day, it means that when you actively try, it’s more noticeable. 

“Y/N, you look insane” they all second it, nodding their heads and winking at you. You twirl a little before sitting down on the bed to check your phone whilst you wait for the others to finish dressing. 

With your heels on, dress on, make up done and all of your friends ready to go, you all gather around to take each others pictures as well as group ones. 

Captioning the solo picture ‘21🥳watch out world, i’m coming for ya’ and pressing upload, you shove your phone, money and lipstick into your bag before leaving the room.

First stop, Oblivion. 

Meanwhile Chris is making a mental note to leave in the next 20 minutes or so, since he’s certain that Dodger will be getting restless without him. After you left he decided to stay there a little longer, wanting nothing more than to spend some extra time with the most important people in his life. 

Once Lisa mentioned dessert, Chris automatically knew he’d be residing on the arm chair for the foreseeable future, especially after his moms cooking, it’s like she’s a professional or some shit. Maybe that’s just a gift given to mothers all over the world though, or maybe Lisa is just magic. 

Either way, he can’t get enough. It’s the one thing he struggles to live without, what with his constant travelling and busy schedule. It makes it hard to spend any time with his nearest and dearest. As depressing as that sounds, it’s all part of being an actor.

Scott sneaks into the lounge, spotting Chris on the arm chair, head thrown back, eyes closed, the button on his jeans undone to allow room for bloating. Perfect target for the beginning of the Nerf gun fight. It was their nephews idea, they asked Scott if he was up for it, and any chance to get his own back on his brother automatically appeals to Scott. 

Chris put Scott through a lot of torment growing up, and sure it was always all love on both parts, but doesn’t mean Scott will ever pass up any opportunity to get Chris back for it. 

One shot, aimed at Chris’s head is all it takes to start the war off. Chris shoots up off of his seat. He immediately spots the Nerf gun at his feet and the second he picks it up, Scott yells “come get us, loser” 

“You better run” Chris yells back, doing his jeans back up before running after his brother and nephews. Laughter fills the house up, warming Lisa’s heart. She can still recall when all of her kids were younger, the many games they played, oh and how could she ever forget the pranks. It was like she spent the majority of her time telling the rowdy kids off. But she wouldn’t have changed any of that for the world. 

The moment you strut up to the entrance of Oblivion, the security guard lifts the rope to welcome the six of you inside, no attempt to even ask for proof of age, your dresses speak for you.

Huge perk. 

First things first, you all head to the bar for your first drinks of the night. Well technically, you had some shots at Jackie’s prior to getting in the cab, but it doesn’t count because that was pre drinks. A way to get the buzz going before heading out, a money saver if you will. 

The club is bustling and loud, no scrap that, it’s deafening. But regardless of the fact that you could burst an ear drum tonight, you welcome it with open arms as you order the first round at the bar. 

The very tall, broad and not to mention cute bartender gives you heavy eye contact, narrowing his eyes as he scans your entire body. His way of sizing you up, you figure. His hair is a dark blonde shade, pushed back out of his face, and his eyes are green, heavenly.

The feel of his eyes is very intense, causing you to squirm a little, so much so that you contemplate chickening out and looking away but then you give yourself a little telling off (silently of course). How do you ever expect to get anywhere with guys if you shy away all of the time? Exactly, you won’t.

So you stare back, even when he looks away to make your drinks. The way his biceps push against the material, begging to be set free as the veins on his forearms become more prominent as he uses the cocktail shaker for your drinks, it’s a sight for sure.

You catch yourself staring way too intensely, moving back a little and clearing your throat but he managed to catch you before you could brush it off. The flirtatious wink he shoots you with as he serves up your cocktails causes your cheeks to heat up, your eyes averting his gaze as you take a sip whilst slipping the money across the bar to him. 

Jackie gestures to a booth across the way, free from any party goers, so you decide that’s your queue to leave and take it whilst it’s free. 

As you walk away, you decide to glance back at the mystery bartender in the white dress shirt, his eyes are still trained on you and you make a mental note to talk to him later. 

Once you’re all seated at your booth, Chris is just collapsing down onto the couch, breathing heavily after a long and close call during the Nerf gun battle. He used to be so much fitter than this, and sure, some would argue that his body is one sculpted by the gods, but to him, he’s far from perfect.

Being Captain America comes with it’s own curses, it’s own standard. One that everyone around him seems to plague him with. To look perfect, to be perfect, to act perfect. But deep down, he just wants to be himself, without worrying about eating a pizza and putting on a little weight. 

He knows his true fans support whatever it is that he does, and they’d love him regardless, but he still gets anxious. 

An hour passes and you’re all still seated comfortably at the same booth, half a dozen empty glasses litter the table with no sign of slowing down anytime soon and you’re all laughing uncontrollably. Is being 21 supposed to ignite a fire inside of you, one of independence? If so, you’ve yet to feel it because secretly you always know you’ll be forever tied to the chains of your parents and their protective nature. 

You’re lucky to have parents that care, sure, but sometimes you just want a break from it all. 

No songs have come on-or at least as of yet anyway-that have stolen your attention enough for you to get up and dance. But the moment Dirrty by Christina Aguilera comes booming through the speakers- an oldie but a goldie in your opinion- you know you have to dance.

Claire glances over in your direction, a smirk gracing her soft facial features, dark eyes lighting up as her smile appears. With just one look, the two of you get up from your spots, strutting over to the dance floor to join the nameless sweaty bodies. 

The moves you’re conjuring up could only be described as provocative, but since you’re turning 21 tomorrow, is there any other way to celebrate?

Absolutely not. 

Claire breezes past you, catching the eye of some random man across the way, his flirtatious stare even warms your cheeks, and you’re not even the focus of it.

You glance back over in the direction of the bar at the tall and broad man behind it rushing around to make drinks for all of the ladies gathered around. He’s definitely enjoying the vast amount of attention on him, judging by the way he smirks and winks at all of the ladies individually. And to think you thought he took a particular liking to you, looks like you really are clueless when it comes to guys. 

After all, you have only slept with one guy, so your list of experience is very small. It happened at a time in your life when the pressure to lose your virginity was insanely high, and you caved. It was with Sam Arthur, a kid you were quite close with growing up. He was constantly getting teased about supposedly being gay and the two of you made a deal. 

Since you didn’t want to be called a prude for a second longer and he was still trying to figure out his sexuality, you decide to just get it over and done with. There was absolutely no foreplay, no romance, no sparks. It was a professional arrangement and you don’t regret it in the slightest. After all, the plan worked and you both got the desired outcomes. The jocks left Sam alone after that, and you became somewhat cool.

The dancing continues, despite you having already lost Claire and your moves get a little more slower paced as the music fades out into a song you barely even recognise. 

So rather than sticking around, you push your way through the crowd and make your way back to the booth to find everyone sat right where you left them. Well with an extra addition of course. The guy that you saw staring at Claire. 

“Y/N, this is Ray, Ray this is my friend Y/N. It’s her birthday” she cheers, knocking back another shot. 

She has a boyfriend, and yet this Ray guy seems to have some kind of impression that she’s interested. 

“Claire, can i talk to you for a sec, in private” you glare at her, making sure she gets the picture loud and clear but there’s no need for a private chat since Ray starts to shuffle out of the booth on his own accord.

“I’ll get the next round in, you girls have your privacy” he smiles, why does he seem like the sweetest guy ever? He’s around Claire’s height 5′6 or 7 give or take, black hair that’s been over gelled, must be his first time out at a club. His white shirt underneath his leather jacket seems trendy enough for him to be your age or close. But you still feel sorry for him.

“Before you guys say anything, Daniel and I broke up... again” you all sigh, as if she can hear you over the music.

“Why didn’t you tell us?”

“Because i didn’t want to ruin your birthday celebrations. But all i want to do now is forget Daniel and focus on having fun and Ray is the perfect distraction” she says, talking with her hands as she always does before lifting up a shot glass. You all follow, picking up the last of the shots and counting to three before knocking them back and wincing.

“Now let’s get drunk, bitches” Sophie cheers, and you all follow suit. 

Not long after Ray returns with enough shots to last a lifetime. It’s going to be a messy one judging by the way things are going so far. 

--------------------------------------

“So Ray, Raymond” you throw your arm around your new friend and pull him close to you.

“Yes Y/N” he laughs, leaning his head on yours. 

“How old are you?” you inquire, talking a little louder so that he can hear you.

“23″ his answer causes you to choke on your wine before pushing him off and announcing his age to the group, their reactions are just as over dramatic as your own. Something Ray finds highly amusing. 

It’s been two hours and while you didn’t plan to stay at the club this long, you have zero complaints since you’ve been far too busy making new friends and dancing all of your troubles away. Or more specifically, grinding and shaking. 

Your moves have caught the eye of the bartender once more but after you noticed the way he talks to other women, you give that a hard pass in your head, smiling politely at him before using Ray as a way to get him off your back. 

Shortly after Claire steals him back from you, probably giving his tiny ego a major inflation. But it had to be done. Otherwise that sleaze bag might think he has an actual chance at taking you home later, and although there would be worse situations to end up in than in a bed next to a perfect stranger, you’d rather not make random hook ups a habit. It was bad enough that your first time wasn’t with your soul mate as you had always planned for it to be, that you’d hate for the second guy you sleep with to be a random guy. 

Like you’ve said before, you don’t regret Sam, you just didn’t make room in your plans for a pity fuck. 

That’s when your mind travels to a certain someone... Chris. 

You’ll bet your life on him being overly experienced when it comes to all things bedroom related. The amount of tabloids you’ve thrown in the bin after seeing him on the cover strolling out of clubs with mystery women or even women you’ve recognised. 

Minka Kelly being the pinnacle of them all. You can recall a little too well how jealous you got. And you hadn’t even seen him in person in god knows how long at that point.

But seeing him today has awoken that feverish need, the one that’s led to all too many nights wrapped in your own sheets, droplets of sweat coating your nude body as your hand played with your dripping wet sex to the thought of him. 

You’re certain he could teach you a thing or two when it comes to sex. The mere thought has your mouth watering pathetically.

However, your x rated thoughts are disrupted as you’re shoved out of nowhere. Your head spins around to your left to find Claire summoning you to follow her and the others as they head for the exit.,

And of course Ray is following you guys to Stu’s. 

The bartenders burning gaze causes you to turn and look at him briefly and in a moment of madness and a drunken haze you strut over, pulling his pen from behind his ear and scribbling your name and number down on a napkin for him. Sure he’s a player but you’re feeling pretty epic right about now.

“See you around, maybe” and with a quick wink, you kiss his cheek before leaving him standing there gobsmacked at the high level of confidence. Sure he’s had plenty of women flirt back, but you doubt that many woman have actually made an official move.

And that assumption fills you with even more confidence before that same confidence is replaced by the cold air causing goosebumps to appear all over your body, head to toe. 

“How far away is Stu’s?” Jackie asks, teeth jittering all the way through the sentence. 

“It’s just at the end of this road here” you say, pointing down the road on your right hand side as you begin to walk in that direction.

“I can’t believe you gave that bartender your number” Payton gasps, giggling like a little school girl “what if he’s like 30″ she’s always been over dramatic. 

“He’s definitely not 30 Payt, gotta be at least nearing it though” you giggle too, realising how crazy that move was. But tonight is the perfect night for crazy decisions. 

If you regret it in the morning, you can always blame the influence of alcohol. 

The walk to Stu’s doesn’t take too long as you all laugh and chatter the whole way and upon your approach to the bar, the familiar face of Paul the bars regular security guard comes into view.

“You again” he smirks, to which Jackie just shrugs.

“What can i say, you draw me back here Paul” her low and seductive voice has officially been activated as she nears closer to the tall man with the dad bod. Now this dude actually looks 30. But he’s cute and totally into Jackie.

“Get in there then and have a drink for me. Oh and Stu is actually behind the bar tonight so enjoy yourself” he shouts to all of you as you strut in with Ray in tow. You assume his abrupt end to the conversation was because he knows the longer she lingers, the more distracted he’ll become. 

And of course, low and behold, Stu is behind the bar. This isn’t your first time here but it is one of 3 times that the owner Stuart has been serving and helping his underpaid staff. 

He’s been talking about hiring more for way too long now with no sign of it actually happening. And believe it or not, he’s offered Jackie a job on more than one occasion, something she’s been leaning closer to a lot more the last couple times you’ve been here. 

However, as cool as her parents are, they’d be hesitant to allow her to work at a place like this. Although, Jackie would just do it regardless of their blessing. 

If she really wants something, no one and nothing will get in her way. 

Do It Again by Pia Mia comes pouring out of the speakers all around, the surround sound making it a lot louder but thankfully you’re too tipsy to give a shit.

You put your order in with Jackie, asking if she can get the round in before dragging the others to the middle of the room, there’s no proper patch in here that could even be considered a dance floor but the centre of the room is where all of the other drunk people have accumulated to dance. So here it is. 

You start to dance, throwing your arms in the air as your body moves, swaying to the rhythm of the music. The build of the song helps your movements to turn sexier but as the chorus comes you just stand there screaming the words to Claire who screams them right back and Payton who just laughs as she jumps. 

How she does that in stilettos, you will never know. 

Claire flicks her hair away from her face before batting her false lashes at Ray who’s just leaning against the bar, biting down on his bottom lip, hunger prominent. 

This is what true freedom is, this is what being a true adult is. Or at least it’s what it is to you. You have an internship, your license, and here you are at a bar drinking with your friends. 

Could you get anymore grown up? Probably not, even if you actively tried.

“Hey, can i ask you something?” you question Claire as the two of you briefly excuse yourselves to go to the ladies room, leaving everyone else dancing, including Ray who was forced to bust some moves by a heavily drunk Payton. The mere sight had you belly laughing before forcing your eyes away. 

And as you enter the bathroom-inserting yourself into the line that always seems to plague the bars and clubs- you feel yourself noticing something in Claire that you’ve spotted on more than one occasion. 

Daniel was never a great boyfriend to her, he always disregarded her feelings with a wave of his hand, sweeping everything underneath the rug. Tonight you feel like Claire is doing the exact same thing and her reason being that she doesn’t want to ruin your night, is utter bullshit. You never want your friends to feel they can’t open up.

“Sure, what’s up?” she asks, turning to lean on the wall outside the bathroom as the line moves a smidge.

“Are you okay? You know, after Daniel” a silly question the more that you think about it, obviously she’s not okay. 

A huff of annoyance escapes her and you’re immediately left with a lump in your throat and a ton of regret on your shoulders, weighing you down. 

But after a beat of silence, she opens her mouth to speak.

“We were a disaster waiting to happen” her words couldn’t ring anymore true, and in a way you can admire her ability to actually speak her truth about the relationship, instead of looking at it through rose tinted lenses. “He didn’t love me, or at least not in the way i loved him and certainly not in the way i deserved. We clashed constantly and it turned our relationship into something so ugly that in the end i wasn’t happy with who i saw staring back at me in the mirror. He had tainted my perspective of myself so much so that i lost who i was before him” tears fill your eyes, blurring your vision momentarily before you use your index finger to help dab them away.

“I tried but in the end it wasn’t good enough. He has a lot he needs to work on, a lot he needs to figure out. And i’m past the point of wanting to wait for someone that already took 4 years from me”

She looks down, averting your eyes as she realises how sad this is making you. 

“Don’t cry, it’s your birthday” she instructs, looking up to wipe a tear before it can fall.

“It’s just.... i know that we don’t know every detail of what happened with Daniel. And you can disclose whatever you want in your own time. But i just want to tell you how proud i am of you for finally walking away” 

Okay, the official self loathing and emotionalism of a girls night out has begun. You know, when every woman intoxicated visits the bathroom and somehow has the longest heart to heart ever whilst simultaneously busting to pee. Yeah, that’s you and Claire right now.

“I love you Y/N” she pulls you close for a hug, the two of you embracing one another with open arms whilst whispering kind words. 

The line moves mid hug, leading you to shuffle forward whilst still clinging on. Something that you know looks odd, but no one says a word. Here in the line to the ladies bathroom, there’s no judgement.

You separate briefly when two cubicles become free for the two of you but once you meet back up at the sinks, you decide to continue your probing.

“So, Ray, huh? What’s that about then?” 

Judging by the expression her face contorts into, she’s not about to divulge into the reasoning behind her making out and flirting with a total stranger.

You dry your hands in silence before standing closer to her “Claire”

“I’m just having fun, that’s all. Besides, he’s a nice guy” she shrugs, dismissing the chat before walking out of the bathroom with you rushing to keep up.

“Did i say something wrong?” you ask, when you finally catch up to her.

“No, i just, i want to live freely tonight, no questions asked. Can we do that?” she asks, her eyes pleading with you to drop the subject of how emotionally ruined she is by what happened with Daniel. And to her surprise, you nod. Linking your arm with hers as you stride over to join the girls again, oh and Ray too.

Upon your return, Ray hands the two of you a shot of what seems to be vodka as you smell it and wince. But, it is your birthday, so down in one it is. 

You knock it back, scrunching your face up in disgust as the music continues to blare, Demi Lovato’s Sorry Not Sorry starting up. Perfect timing for Claire. You glance at her and she rolls her eyes before kicking off the moves. 

Stu who is rushing around the bar like a headless chicken spots her and he immediately summons her to dance on the bar, something she shakes her head no to, refusing to fall over in front of all of these people. But that’s when you take the opportunity for her, in hopes that it’ll loosen her up a little.

Almost the entirety of the bar cheers you on as you start to bust all kinds of moves, strutting confidently along the bar, making eye contact with a couple of guys who seem more than impressed with your ability to stand up and walk without falling. 

Soon enough, following a lot of pushing, Claire gets up to join you and she’s followed by Payton, Jackie, Sophie and Layla. Sophie shimmies in your direction and you do the same back before throwing your heads back laughing like school kids. 

The crowd cheers the 6 of you on, Including Ray. His wolf whistles in Claire’s direction don’t go unnoticed, Claire’s cheeks flush a bright red shade as she looks down at him, smiling from ear to ear.

Despite your confusion about her need for a distraction, you know that right now you don’t need to understand it. If this is something she needs for tonight then who are you to judge?

Once the song fades into a new one, you take a bow dramatically, thanking your audience before stepping down. 

“Drinks for the birthday girl” Stu shouts over the music “nice moves Y/N” his wink doesn’t go unnoticed as you take the vodka soda from his hand, not even bothering to sip it slowly. 

You’re so going to regret that...

Chris bids his family goodbye as he gets his jacket on at the front door whilst Lisa waits to give him a hug.

Scott already did and now he’s waiting in the lounge with their nephews who are asleep either side of him after scoffing down second helpings of dessert. Something Chris had to decline, although he did request for Lisa to put some in some Tupperware for him to enjoy later on or tomorrow. 

The moment he gets into his car it’s officially 11:35pm, way too late for his nephews to not be in bed but since it’s a weekend, their mother didn’t mind them falling asleep on the couch. Eventually they’ll be taken to bed, just not yet. It spurs on memories for Chris and when himself and his siblings used to purposely fall asleep on the couch so that their parents would have to carry them to their room like royalty.

He turns the key in the ignition before putting his seat belt on and pulling away from the curb and onto the road. The drive to his place should only take around 15 minutes, depending on the traffic. “Hold tight, Dodger, Daddy’s on his way home” he mutters to himself as he checks his mirrors, his car nearing the busy side of town.

Ray orders the last round of the night, insisting that it’s the least he could do for you since it’s your birthday. And how could you ever pass up free shots of tequila?

Stu slides the full tray over to you all before walking to the other side of the bar to take someone else’s order.

The 7 of you stand in a circle, swaying as you smile “to turning 21″ you announce, holding the glass in the air for everyone to follow suit. 

“To turning 21″ they repeat, your glasses clink and you all knock it back before paying Stu and heading for the exit, dancing on your way out to Beyoncés Drunk In Love. 

Jackie immediately finds Paul, twirling her long brown hair around her index finger as she flirts shamelessly with a man way too old for her. Although, you’re not exactly one to judge, you know with you quite literally being the poster girl for inappropriate crushes.

The name Chris Evans should ring a bell.

You stumble a little as you walk further out into the cold, wrapping your arms around yourself as if it’ll somehow rid you of the shivering and teeth jittering. Whilst Claire and Ray start to make out in the middle of the pavement, causing everyone to make fake sick noises at. But it all ends in laughter. 

Chris ends up pulling down a different road to the one he usually takes on the journey home from his moms house, a way of avoiding the heaps of traffic on the other route. 

But as he slows down behind a car that’s giving way to a driver on his way up the road he just came down, he taps the steering wheel, mindlessly looking out onto the street. 

However, what he didn’t expect to find was you. You’re stood there, shivering in the cold in the boldest red dress that he’s ever seen. Your long legs are out with more than just a healthy amount of cleavage showing too. And by the looks of your location, either you’re just coming out of a bar or about to go in. 

He recalls you mentioning about it being your 21st tomorrow, so his guess is this is your night of celebration for hitting one of those milestone points in your adolescent life. Although adolescent is hardly the word he’d use to describe you. You’re far from it in fact. 

A loud horn beeping knocks him from his focus on you but just before he pulls away, he sees you stumbling, almost falling over.

He immediately pulls his car over to a place of safety before getting out and approaching you, no time for rational thinking as he helps you before you almost fall yet again.

“Someones had a big night, i take it” he chuckles, wrapping his arms around your body to steady you and once your eyes meet his, they widen in surprise.

A loud gulp can be heard by yourself and Chris as you stare at him in bewilderment. What is he doing here?

And has he always been so big?

“I was just driving past and i noticed you, thought you looked like you could do with a ride home” a lie. In reality, he was feeling protective and even jealous at the thought of another man being attracted to you, so much so that he wanted to nip it in the bud before it can even happen.

“Well aren’t you quite the gentleman” you giggle, tapping his chest and grinning up at him.

“How much has she had?” Chris calls out, catching the attention of your friends, his grip around your body tightening. 

“Too much to count if that helps” Jackie shrugs, “she’s staying at mine tonight anyway, she’ll be fine” somehow with how distracted Jackie is, he’s not believing that for a second.

“Actually i’ll get her back safely” 

You widen your eyes, pushing away from Chris’s grasp “i am not going home” you protest, your parents cannot see you this way, whatsoever.

“Why not?” Chris follows you as you walk to the edge of the curb to summon a cab.

“Because one look at my drunken state and my outfit and my dad won’t let me out of my room for the rest of my life” you roll your eyes out of habit at the reminder of your strict parents. 

Chris just stands there, hands in his pockets, silence filling the air between you before he sees a cab driving toward you.

“My car is right over there, i can take you wherever you want, without charge” he smirks, causing you to do the same before calling your friends and gesturing to the cab that’s waiting.

As they all file in one by one, Jackie notices you standing further away “what about you?” she eyes Chris with a gleam of amusement in her eyes.

“I’ll be fine, i’ll text you, okay?” you say, leaning in to hug her before shutting the door for her.

“Stay safe” she blows you a kiss and with that, she’s gone.

You turn on your heels to face Chris, looking up to meet his eyes “lead the way then” a command he listens to but not before attempting to help you, something you shrug off.

“I’m perfectly capable of walking myself” your tone of voice is a lot snappier than you had initially intended for it to be. You just meant to say that you’re fine to walk without his assistance, yet it came off bratty and rude. Great.

You reach Chris’s car and with your tipsy state as well as the dark shadowing over the two of you, you can barely make out the type of car that he drives. But who cares right, your life long crush is about to drive you wherever you want, guess you’re winning.

“So where did you want me to drop you?” he asks as he gets into the drivers side, turning the key in the ignition before turning the heating on to warm you up. And slowly but surely you feel the goosebumps fade and the shivers die down. 

It feels weird being here. Although you’ve wanted to be alone with him for such a long time, it feels strange to actually be here, for your wish to be coming true. Well, only half of your wish. Most of that wish centred around intimacy occurring between the two of you, fat chance of that happening.

“Anywhere where my parents are not” you smile nervously, turning to face the window and glancing out at the streets that are now filling with more party goers, the majority of them are only just starting their nights whilst yours is officially over.

Sadly.

“What’s the deal with them anyway?” he asks, starting the car and pulling out of the tight space, one he has no clue how he even parked in in the first place. Lust does crazy things to a man, as well as jealousy and protectiveness.

“They just don’t believe in giving me freedom. They are protective, too protective and it’s like i can’t do much without them setting rules” you huff, looking back away from his powerful blue orbs. 

Those same blue orbs that led to you feeling this way about him in the first place and led you to dangerous territory.

He’s your dad’s best friend, you could never.

“You don’t have to feel sorry for me, you know. I’m fine, i’d just like to have their trust for once that’s all” you dismiss it, muttering under your breath as the trees and houses pass you by.

However, once the car comes to a stop, you furrow your brows, no sense of familiarity in your surroundings.

As soon as you turn to face Chris, you’re not surprised to find his eyes already fixated on you, he leans back against his seat, his head turned on the head rest to face you. His eyes drinking you in, dancing across your entire body hungrily, eyes dark from lust. 

Does he want you as much as you want him?

Chris bites down on his bottom lip as his eyes make their way back up to your face, only to find your eyes watching him intently. He’s currently parked outside of what you assume to be his house, with you in his car. You said anywhere where your parent’s weren’t going to be and this was the only option in his head. Is it wrong to have you here? Or is it perfectly normal?

Who knows at this point, it’s too late to back track anyway.

“What?” you ask, covering yourself with your arms as you turn shy under his intense gaze and he immediately leans over to lift your head back up with his index finger under your chin.

“What?” he repeats, feigning cluelessness. When in reality, Chris knows dam well what you were asking him. 

Instead he chooses not to answer by ripping his eyes away.

“Shall we get into the warm?” his offer is so tempting and you’d usually jump at that chance but you can feel an uneasiness settling in as though your body is telling you that if you go inside with him, that it’ll more than likely change everything. That things will never be the same again. 

But somehow you shake it off, undoing your seatbelt and getting out, deciding to follow him inside the house after he locks the car and opens the door to the house. And the inside is even more fancy than you ever imagined, way too fancy for the likes of you, but if he’s inviting you in, who are you to question it?

Not even a second later, a big fluffy dog charges up to you, barking and licking at you and begging for attention.

“Woah, who’s this fluffy baby?” you inquire, dropping to your knees to make a fuss of the fur ball, welcoming the sloppy dog kisses happily. But as he goes to lick your face some more you back away, giggling.

“This is Dodger, he was a rescue dog” he announces, whilst locking the door and tossing his keys into the bowl on shelves nearby.

“He’s so fluffy” you cuddle into him and Dodger pants more, getting all the more excited at the presence of someone new.

Eventually once Dodger calms down, you start to take your heels off with Chris watching your every move. 

The way you undo the intricate lace on your heels, is so fascinating for such a boring act, he enjoys watching regardless. 

Once they are off, you rise to your feet and pad into the kitchen behind him, you’re so much smaller than he is and you’d be lying if that alone didn’t turn you on. You lift yourself onto one of the many stools parked around the kitchen island and the lights come on shortly after, only the ones tucked underneath the kitchen cupboards that hang over the kitchen counter but still it gives the setting soft lighting, enough for the moment. Chris starts to rummage around in one of the cupboards overhead before pulling out a glass and sticking it underneath the water dispenser attached the fridge. 

He hands the half full glass to you and you grip it with both hands, lifting it to your lips to take a sip whilst your eyes watch as Chris leans back on the counter across from you. His hands grip it with white knuckle force and his eyes skim over your body for the umpteenth time tonight. Now you’re curious, what exactly is he looking at and why has he felt the need to look so many times?

“Is there something on my dress?” you ask, placing the glass down and looking down at your provocative ensemble. 

He clears his throat after almost choking on his own saliva at your words “what? n-no, you’re dress is perfectly fine” his eyes widen with embarrassment as he realises you noticed him looking. 

It’s that look in his eyes that alerts you of his attraction and even though nothing could ever happen, that’s good enough for you. In fact, the knowledge of Chris Evans finding you somewhat attractive is more than good enough.

“You can stay here by the way, hence why i brought you here. I have more than enough room and i’ll drop you back at your friends house in the morning.

You nod your head in agreement before uttering a quiet thank you in his direction without looking up. 

The hairs on the back of his neck instantly stand on end whenever you meet his gaze, the gleam in your eyes is so innocent yet so seductive and the way that silky dress hugs your body like a second skin is enough to wake his dick up.

But, he’s doing everything humanly possible to prevent it. In these jeans, it’ll be more than obvious to you and that’s the last thing he wants.

He knows it can never happen, in fact he’s kicking himself for even bringing you here. You insisted on going back with your friends, why didn’t he listen? So stupid, Chris. He curses himself silently, hoping he never said any of that out loud.

The silence is deafening yet comfortable. But you decide to break it anyway, not realising, Chris had the same intentions.

“So -” you both start before looking directly at one another and breaking into laughter at the fact that you both spoke in unison. 

“You go first” he offers, his powerful stare not letting up.

“I was just going to ask how come you stopped to help me?” 

“I saw you stumbling all over the place and i panicked. I know that your dad would have wanted me to look out for you, so i decided to stop you from hurting yourself” he cares. 

“Oh” you murmur, a strand of hair falling down and grazing your cheek briefly before Chris reaches over to tuck it behind your ear, his fingers lingering on your skin, the feel of them burning you deliciously.

But once he removes them, you’re left yearning for their return. The way he touches you fills you with a sense of wholeness, something you’ve lacked your entire life. 

Would it be so wrong if you let go of control, even if it was just for one night? But more importantly, would he let go of his control for one night too, for you?

There’s only one way to find out and that’s for you to take a leap and try. The warm and buzzing sensation wracking your drunken body eggs you on to finally make a move, the move you’ve wanted to make for so long yet have never been old enough or had the courage to.

And now that you’re 21, surely it’s now or never.

Shivers run down your spine as you prepare yourself, psyching yourself up.

Chris notices you shift in your seat and the feel of your breathe against his hand as he retracts it from your face, it drives him insane. The shallowness of your breath indicating that you’re occupied with something or someone, that you’re nervous or maybe it’s just the alcohol and the fact that he’s standing way too close to you.

But as you look up through your long and natural eyelashes, the way they flutter at the sight of his own eyes staring right back at you, as though they are staring into your soul, he spots something. A tell tale sign of just what’s on your mind.

A fear fills him rapidly as he steps back “we can’t” he snaps, voice low. Far from a telling off but it still feels like one, like he’s scolding you for feeling.

You slip down from the bar stool and back away slowly “so where is the spare room? I think i’ll need to shower before i sleep too” speaking as you look everywhere else aside from him. 

“Y/N” 

When you don’t answer, he realises that it’s probably best to just forget what just happened or more so what could have happened had he not acted accordingly.

Instead he follows you out into the hall before walking ahead to direct you to one of the many spare bedrooms, one with an en suite so that you can shower too.

“There are towels in the cupboard under the sink and spare clothes of mine in some of the drawers, they’ll do for tonight” he informs you, as he lingers in the doorway to the bathroom.

“I have to sort Dodger before i sleep myself so should you need anything, at all, i’ll be in the lounge or the kitchen” he smiles weakly before turning and walking away, leaving you all alone to get yourself cleaned up.

As he makes his way back into the kitchen to sort Dodger out, he can’t help but think that if the circumstances were different that he wouldn’t have thought twice about letting you kiss him. But seeing as the circumstances aren’t different and that you are indeed his best friends daughter, not to mention you’re drunk, he knows it can never be. 

Doesn’t stop him from wanting you though, he is a man after all, a man with needs and a heavy attraction to the one woman he shouldn’t want.

As Dodger wonders around the garden to do his business, Chris’s mind runs elsewhere, on the thought of you in his shower right now. The mental image he’s had of how you’ll look naked roams his brain, torturing him endlessly. 

It’s like the devil on his shoulder is urging him to make a move, to go through with it but then he knows the angel on the other shoulder will soon make a list of why it won’t be a good choice. 

Both of them battling one another and only one will come out on top but at this point, Chris has no clue which one will win.

He scrunches his hands up into fists at his sides as he walks Dodger back into the house before going around to lock all of the doors and windows. 

Dodgers paws tap on the floor as he scurries behind Chris to keep up and when they walk back to the other side of the house to go to bed, he notices your bedroom door is closed, and the lights are off. Signalling that you’re now asleep, causing his heart to sink a little.

You slip underneath the covers of the unfamiliar bed, the cold but comfortable sheets grazing your skin as you toss and turn to get comfortable before picking your phone up to text Jackie.

You: Jac, i’m stopping at Chris’s tonight, he’ll drop me back in the morning so i can fetch my stuff. Thank you for such a great night x

Jackie: You’re welcome, love you and use protection x

Typical Jackie. You shake your head at her insinuation that anything will happen between you and Chris. After all, he made it very clear that nothing will ever happen judging by the way he backed off when you were about to kiss him. 

You’ll never disclose this detail to anyone other than the voice in your head but the way he stepped back made you feel embarrassed. You always knew it was a long shot but to have him look so disgusted at the idea of you kissing him, it was hardly the reaction you had anticipated. But then again, you don’t know what you expected. However, it definitely wasn’t that.

The sheets wrap around you and follow as you turn to face the other side of the room. With your alarms set and your phone resting on the bedside table, you know that you better go to sleep. 

But before you can, you notice the time on the alarm clock, it reads 12:30am.

“Happy Birthday Y/N”

You close your eyes to sleep, allowing your brain to replay the entire night for you. The bar dancing, the almost kiss with Chris and the emotional chat with Claire. The night wasn’t all bad. You still managed to enjoy yourself and have lots of fun. 

Suddenly your throat turns dry and you decide to get up to go in search of a drink. Chris is probably in bed by now, or at least you’re assuming he is so you decide to tip toe your way through the halls of his big house, trying not to get lost. 

The faint light in the distance leads the way to the kitchen thankfully.

Upon your entrance, you realise you’re alone. Chris is asleep then. You can’t say you weren’t secretly hoping he was awake. 

One of his many shirts that you found in the drawers covers your nude body, it’s an old pats shirts, one that has obviously been worn a lot judging by how tattered it looks. It comes to the middle of your thighs, serving as a night dress. It’s comfortable too. You also have on some of his brand new Calvin Klein boxers

You go to retrieve a new glass from the cupboard when you spot the one that you drank out of previously still very much half full and sitting on the counter with a note.

“Drink up” 

“Yes, sir” you mumble to yourself before lifting the glass to your lips and gulping down the majority of its contents. The cold and fresh water gliding down your throat feels so good and you can slowly feel the alcohol taking less control of your body as well as your headache fading. 

The second you empty the glass you rest it in the sink before spinning around on the balls of your feet to walk out but that’s when you bump into Chris.

Your hands naturally find purchase on his toned chest, the hardness doesn’t surprise you.

“Sorry, i was just going back to bed” you squeak, slipping around him and toward the door but his hand catches your wrist, gripping it tight enough for you to stop in your tracks completely. 

“What are you doing?” your question hangs in the air, and you wait with bated breath for him to answer it but instead he turns around to face you, his head tilted down so that your eyes meet. Okay, now you really do feel small. 

The sudden chill that dances down your body is far from one of uneasiness, if anything you feel so peculiarly comfortable around him. And you barely know him. In fact you only know what your father has told you as well as what you’ve picked up on and it’s not a whole lot.

The unspoken admittance of attraction lingers in the air, crackling and fizzling like fireworks. 

And as he leans down further, his plump and pink lips brushing yours ever so slightly before his tongue dips out to wet them prior to capturing yours in an intense and earth shattering kiss. You realise that In this situation, you’re perfectly content with no words being spoken, actions suffice perfectly. 

A grumble coming from the back of his throat, a moan trapped and ready to be set free alerts you of his arousal. That and the feel of his dick in his pants pressing against your stomach as he pulls you closer to him, your bodies pressed together in a way you never anticipated would ever become a reality.

His large and calloused fingers slide downward to your hips, digging in. But the love you develop for his soon to be bruising touch overrules the rationality of the sinful act you’re partaking in with the one man you shouldn’t want but do regardless. 

If only your dad could see you now, he’d flip his shit and probably despise Chris for what he’s doing. He’d never see you as two adults, old enough to consent to something so intimate and erotic. Instead he’d go crazy. 

Thankfully he’ll never know.

Chris lifts you up onto the kitchen island, standing in between your legs and spreading them further apart in order for his hands to do some exploring.

The kiss breaks, and you’re breathless, panting as your chest rises and falls, your eyes locked on the man in front of you. The way his biceps bulge in the short sleeved white shirt he has on, it seems way too small to cover up his super soldier body, that’s for sure.

His breath fans your face as you play with the hem of his shirt, hinting at him to take it off. Something he takes note of instantly, pulling at it himself and before you know it, his upper half is on view for you.

Without a second to think, or even to second guess what you’re doing, you lean down to plant a kiss to his torso and then another just below his pecks. He watches you with curiosity, wanting to see how you’ll please him.

He has no knowledge of your previous sexual experience but so far there have been no issues in the kissing department. 

Your lips make their way up to his pecks and then his neck. To reach the spot you want, you pull him down to gain the access. Your lips wrapping around the spot just below his ear, your teeth nipping at the unblemished skin just enough to elicit a quiet, whisper like moan.

“Ohhh” he continues to groan until you pull away to face him, the eye contact lingering before he throws caution the wind, his hand dipping underneath your-his-shirt and into his new Calvin Klein boxer shorts that he stored in the spare room for when he needed them. Looks like they belong to you now, no complaints. 

Heavy breathing fills the silence as you feel his hand touch you in the one place you’ve dreamt of him doing so. The reality compared to the dream of it is so much more arousing, and you can quite literally feel more of that same arousal pooling at the tight hole of your inexperienced cunt.

His index finger circles it, gathering some before spreading it across your petal like folds, smearing it everywhere and suddenly your need for him intensifies. Your body arches into his demanding touch and you already know that from this moment on, whatever happens, you’ll be in safe in his large hands.

“You like this” it sounds like it’s supposed to be a question but he says it like a statement, as if he just knows you love it and crave more. Just a little more...pressure.

“Chris” you groan breathlessly, hand gripping the edge of the kitchen island counter with white knuckle force as your legs spread, moving on their own accord and succumbing to his every touch pathetically.

After lusting someone for so long, you learn to expand your imagination, your dream world allowing you to explore every possible scenario, every possible vision of how that person will look when doing certain things. But being in this position right now with Chris, he’s more impressive that your mind had allowed you to imagine. His kiss is so much more fiery than the one in your dreams and his body is just god like. 

You’re one lucky woman to even know him in the way that you do, what with him being your dads best friend. But you’re even luckier to see him like this, so intimate, so raw and real. He’s a man at the end of the day, a man with needs and here you are, getting to fulfil them and so much more.

Maybe this is what the two of you need, to go there and explore each other’s bodies before you can really escape your own personal hell of pining for one another. 

“Say that again” his raspy voice causes your hips to roll on his hand as his fingers rub at your bundle of nerves over and over, the pleasure consuming your body and washing over you like rain. 

“Chris” you moan, voice lower and more seductive than usual as you make sure his eyes are on yours before biting your bottom lip. 

His hands pulls out of the boxers you’re wearing before tugging you closer to the edge so that your ass is hanging off it as your body is relaxed against the cool marble.

He hooks his fingers into the band of the boxers, wasting no time in pulling them down and spreading your legs to expose your pussy to his hungry eyes. They grow darker, if that’s even possible as he licks his lips before pulling out one of the stools at the kitchen island. 

“Such a pretty pussy, baby. Love the way you’re spreading those legs for me, like a not so innocent little whore” you gulp, every inch of your skin now covered in goosebumps.

You watch him take a seat on it in front of your spread legs that he drapes over his shoulders before blowing air on your mound and the small patch of hair that covers it beautifully. 

His tongue pokes out as he nears closer to it but rather than focusing on the pulse point, he averts his mouth to that dripping entrance of yours, the never ending fountain of arousal, his to taste and drink from until his hearts content. 

“Oh god” you cry out the moment his mouth makes contact with your sex, the feel of him on your most intimate part is almost too much for you to handle and the added sensation of his beard grazing the skin of your thighs, scratching deliciously, you have no idea how you’ve gone so long without this. Without the feel of a man loving you so precisely, the movement of his tongue as it navigates you slowly, taking its sweet time.

The need for his mouth to be everywhere all over your body all at once, it’s greediness at its finest, a feeling you’ll never cure.

The sensitivity that occurs as he hums on your clit before wrapping his lips around it with care, it sends your body into a shivering state, unable to comprehend all of this mind blowing pleasure.

Your inexperience once again rearing its head and showing itself to Chris.

“Tell me no one else has ever made you come before, tell me i’m the only one” his voice so low and gruff, it’s pleasure conjured up specifically for your ears.

Your hands slides into his perfectly styled hair, his locks now messed up as you tug whilst propping yourself up onto your elbows to get a better view of him.

“You’re the only one, now make me come” your confidence surprises him but he doesn’t wait a beat before he’s back between your legs, loving you the way you’ve always wished he would. 

His mouth working you up, your pleasure intensifying like a crescendo building, your orgasm impending. It’s dangling in front of you, so close that you can almost taste the relief you’re about to feel thanks to Chris.

“Give those sweet juices to me, sweetheart. I know this body has more to offer, so be a good little slut and give them to me” his words are so sinful yet so angelic, and you’re putting that down to his voice.

Chris Evans, the man that can make anything sound sweet and caring, not to mention sexy.

It’s his not so hidden talent. 

You roll your hips, your pussy dragging across his mouth as you push for release. The feel of it edging closer is torturous.

But the moment he inserts a finger inside of you, pumping it in and out a couple of times before adding a second you feel your pussy walls spasm around his thick digits and he sucks in a breath.

“There it is, wrap that tight pussy around my fingers, baby. Come all over them and make a mess like i know you can”

His words set off something inside of you and you feel your entire body shudder, your toes curl and you arch your back in response. 

Your first proper orgasm.

“Good girl” his praise fills you with a sense of contention that nothing else has ever been able to give you, not even succeeding at school and college has been able to give you that. Yet Chris praising you for making a mess all over his fingers sure does something to you.

You spasm again around his digits before he withdraws them, lifting them to his lips.

His tongue darts in between them, licking up every single drop of the juices you have to offer before scooping you up into his arms, your body fitting right in his hands as he carries you back into the guest room, using his foot to kick the door shut. 

He lays you down so gently, almost as though he fears you’ll break.

You watch him cross the room, taking his time to undress in front of you, putting on a real show. 

Once he pulls his boxers down though, that’s when you really start to panic. You’ve never seen something so intimidating and yet you feel nothing but a visceral instinct to please him no matter what.

So rather than waiting for him to take the reins, you move to your knees to remove your shirt, revealing your bare breasts to him. Your nipples are now hardened peaks. He rakes his eyes over your now fully nude body, before watching as you crawl closer to the edge of the bed. 

You lie on your stomach, using your fingers to summon him over and once he approaches, you wrap your hand around his impressive size. He looms over you, casting a shadow across the bed, his hands resting on his hips as he allows you to touch him. The longer you’re near him, the smaller you feel.

The sensation of your hand causes him to jerk, it’s been way too long since Chris had a woman touching him like this let alone one he wanted this bad. 

Your tongue starts off at his balls, licking over them before sucking one into your mouth, one hand still wrapped loosely around his cock. 

“Fuck, Y/N, please” he begs, just for a little more attention. When it comes to you, he always wants more.

Once you’ve caused just enough of a stir within him, you move to lick up the underside of his cock, making sure to take your sweet little time, you want to hear him beg for it, beg for you to suck his cock.

“Y/N” his hands move to your head, weaving into your hair and gripping at the strands hard as you reach the tip of his dick, head leaking pre-ejaculate that you soon lick away. The salty tang of it hitting your tongue is enough for you to want a better taste of him. 

That’s when you give in, wrapping your mouth around his head before easing him in, inch by thick veiny inch. 

A loud and guttural groan escapes him, unashamedly. The feel of your warmth around him, almost giving him an insight into what your pussy will feel like. 

So fitting, like a glove. 

The moment you fit the rest of his size in your mouth, you gag around him uncontrollably, unable to fit him without doing so. So you pull off, with a pop of course.

Tears fill your eyes before streaming down your cheeks rapidly, tears that Chris soon wipes away before lifting you up to your knees and manoeuvring the two of you further up the bed.

“Where did you learn that, sweetheart?” his impressed voice signals that you did a great job, and that fills you with pride, especially since you’ve never it before.

“That was my first time” 

Chris stops in his tracks as his hand cups your face, his thumb stroking your soft skin.

“Have you ever had sex?” his understanding and non judgemental voice lets you know you can be brutally honest with him and still remain comfortable.

“I’ve only done it once”

He nods in understanding before reaching over to the night stand to retrieve a condom. He looks down, brows furrowing as he concentrates to put it on. But once he does you feel the weight of him hovering above you. His hands either side of your head for support and cage you in as he uses his knee to nudge your legs apart. 

You spread and wrap them around him whilst he uses one hand to tap his cock on your clit, causing you to shudder once again. You’re still very much a sensitive mess in the aftermath of his tongues attack. 

“Chris, do you want this?” that little voice in the back of your head second guesses his attraction, his need for you. And suddenly you don’t feel good enough.

“I want this, i want you. Do you want me?” the way he reverses the doubt, and suddenly he’s the vulnerable one looking for confirmation that he’s not alone in this. 

“Yes” you murmur, your hands cupping his face are pulling him down so that your lips can connect as he nudges himself at your entrance, pushing in slowly

Your lips part into the kiss as you moan loudly, eyes rolling into the back of your head, back arching into him as he uses one hand to hold you whilst the other one holds him up.

“Christ” your music fills his ears as he eases in and out, making sure your comfortable first before establishing a far from steady pace.

“I need more of you” you plead, eyes locked with his, foreheads touching before kissing him again, his tongue pushing its way in just like his cock is doing to your cunt. 

Allowing him to take over everything, your body relaxes, giving him the go ahead to speed things up and when his hips start to snap, his cock spearing into you relentlessly, your noises slip more often than not.

If this is what sex feels like with someone you truly lust after, you don’t ever want sex without it. You wish you could live in a world where you could have this for breakfast, lunch and dinner., But it’s just not realistic unfortunately.

However, until morning comes, you’ll live in this bubble of denial.

“S’tight, sweetheart” he grunts, sweat droplets coating his forehead and body as well as your own as you move with his thrusts, developing a rhythm that’s fast and needy, fuelled by desperation alone. 

The feel of him poking at that spongy spot within you continuously, it’s breathtaking, a brand new experience for you, one you want to experience again and again. 

Although you know this is a one time thing.

“Look at you, so small but you’re taking all of me so well, huh? Such. A. Good. Fucking. Girl” you clench down around him hard, at the pure filth he’s spouting, such a dirty mouth for such a gentleman. This side of Chris is one you could certainly grow used to seeing more often.

It’s addicting. He’s addicting.

“You gonna come? Huh baby?” he captures your lips in a passionate and fiery kiss, tongues included before waiting for your response.

You’re giving him all of the tell tale signs that you’re about to reach your first penetration induced orgasm. One in which he’s gladly taking from you, the thought of you going as long as you had without a single orgasm hurts his chest. What kind of men are around you? Clearly they aren’t men at all, just boys who can’t see a special little thing for shit. If only you were older and you met sooner under different circumstances.

“I’m gonna come” you nod along with him, wrapping your legs tighter around his waist but he soon moves them, draping them over his shoulders and the new position offers different yet better access to your g-spot. And a couple more thrusts is all it takes for him to hit it just right.

Your body goes taut as you cling to the sheets below for dear life.

Guttural moans, skin slapping against skin, it all bounces off the walls as you both come undone with each other. The intimacy reaching higher levels.

His hips start to falter and you feel him twitch, it’s clear your orgasm spurred his own on.

Chris can’t even fathom what has just occurred, the events that led him to this position, above you, easing himself through an orgasm you caused. 

As soon as he pulls out and disposes of the condom into the bin, he collapses onto the bed next to where you lay. The two of you nothing but breathless messes.

The holy father has to forgive you, for you have sinned and you must repent. 

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