#and then he realizes Oh Fuck Thats Right. Im Doing This For God & Jesus Not Just For Fun

[kraviolis]

Belos: I’m going to raise Luz as my daughter and ensure that she remains pure and loyal to me.

Also Belos: I’m going to let the 7-years-old clone of my brother take care of her I’m sure he’ll be able to do that.

you joke but thats LITERALLY his entire thought process at first. he's so isolated and arrogant that he couldnt possibly comprehend the idea that luz wouldnt see him as her father despite the fact he literally told hunter he was going to be her older brother and never once encouraged hunter to see him as anything but an uncle.

i attribute this to the fact that philip is an orphan who only ever knew his blood brother as his only caretaker, so he sorta took having a brother for granted and didn't realize that was something you could want rather than something that just Is.

(also caleb was the only person philip ever truly knew + loved and even well into his 300s he never once picked up a child psychology book and realized that Perhaps His Worldview Was Skewed Because Of That.)

he literally like. could not comprehend the idea that you could even choose your own family outside of like. being adopted by someone. thats the other thing with him being so annoyingly christian in this AU, he was taught that your blood family (esp yr parents) is always the most important thing in your life & you should always be grateful to them no matter what.

(this is another factor into why he keeps making grimwalkers. in his own twisted viewpoint, it's him giving caleb another chance. and another. and another-- at least in this specific characterization of him.)

philip thought that him adopting luz would mean she would immediately be eternally grateful to him and call him father and the whole nine yards. but he forget to actually express that expectation until it was too late (aka until he heard her call him uncle for the first time)

honestly, hes not MAD about it. he's just sorta :( about it bcus hes not actually insane and can still logically think like "she did say she had just lost her real father to an illness its perfectly reasonable for her to not want to replace him" (he doesnt think it outloud but he also enjoys living thru her vicariously

but also later on as she gets older it gets to a point where he's like "ok its been years now why isnt she trying to replace him yet" bcus he thinks its a normal + healthy part of the grieving process to replace the person you lost (figuratively or, in his case, Literally)

[spookitapes]

Hello, i love your fics! Im a bit embarassed but i had an idea earlier today. Imagine beig on a relationship with Ted while hes a trip visiting every margaritaville or rain forest, whatever you prefer and you miss him a lot so when you can finally go visit him on the trip he shows you how much he missed you by fucking you so good you barely walk the next day. Okay thats all, thank you bye!

a/n: oh my gosh don't be embarrassed! pls send me more stuff I love it !!! and thank you so much for the support< 33 it's mainly RFC buuuut i did a little bonus of margaitaville ft. schlatt at the end :))) sorry it took me a minute to see this in my inbox!! but I hope you enjoy it bc this was actually super fun to write !!

!! 18+ ONLY MINORS DNI !!

surprising ted on his rainforest cafe roadtrip hc's

❧ getting the trip schedule from eddy so you can pick which days works best for you

❧ planning it weeks before they even leave

❧ ted having literally no clue what’s happening

❧ stuffing his face with safari fries when he hears an all too familiar “teddy!” coming from behind him

❧ thinking he’s finally going crazy bc why is he imagining your voice amongst the animatronic themed restaurant's ambiance ??

❧ almost tackling him out of his chair when you finally reach him bc you didn’t realize you were full-on sprinting in the rainforest cafe

❧ a very sweet reunion that takes ted entirely by surprise

❧ (don't worry eddy gets a good angle) it's some nice behind-the-scenes footage for you two :))

❧ “jesus christ honey i didn’t know you’re that strong!”

❧ ted laying his head on your shoulder anytime he can

❧ sharing a sparkling volcano for the memory of it

❧ getting back to the hotel and making out in the elevator on the way to the room you booked

❧ him immediately pinning you to the door when it closes

❧ he's missed you so much

❧ missed your body so much

❧ he'd been having to take cold showers

❧ and that worked until he found the nude polaroids you had left him in his luggage

❧ he's been reduced to jerking off, switching to hot steam instead of a standing ice bath

❧ so you can't really blame him for taking you right there

❧ stripping you of only what's necessary

❧ if your wearing jeans? gone. pants of any kind? bye bye. shorts? across the room...but a dress or a skirt? he's just pushing it up your hips

❧ pulling your panties to the side (if you're wearing any op-)

❧ hiking one of your legs up onto his hip as he barely gets his cock out of his pants before pushing into you

❧ both of you letting out a gasp as he bottoms out

❧ him holding your hand against the door with one hand and rubbing your clit with the other

❧ eventually bringing your leg around his hip up over his shoulder so he can hit deeper

❧ him fucking you so rough the do not disturb sign's swinging on the other side of the door

❧ once you both cum he'll carry you over to the bed so he can finish stripping you

❧ slowly peeling the clothes away as he kisses your skin that appears

❧ him pushing your face into the sheets to muffle the porn star level moans leaving your mouth

❧ "god baby, you're gonna get us kicked out if you keep screaming like that."

❧ but how can you stay quiet when he's balls deep drilling you from the back giving you the best dick of your life ??

❧ him getting fed up so he puts one of his big ass hands over your mouth as he fucks you harder

❧ just the sounds of skin on skin slapping, ted's groans, and your muffled sobs fill the room

❧ going at least three more rounds before he's carrying you to the bathtub to clean you up

❧ begging him to get in with you and getting him to after pulling out the big eyes and jutted out bottom lip combo

❧ scooting up so he can slide in behind you

❧ just holding each other in the warm bubbley water

❧ "i love you so much baby, remind me to never go on a trip without you again."

❧ it's followed with a tender kiss on your forehead

❧ you pause a moment before shifting your head so you can catch his eyes, a smile overtaking your features

❧ he thinks you're gonna say something sappy, something that'll probably make you tear up

❧ "you can go on as many trips as you want if that's how you're gonna fuck me."

❧ he splashes you with the bath water...

❧ the next day he's calling you to hurry up and get ready, something about needing to be back on the road

❧ he gets met with a long, loud, angry groan in return

❧ "uuhhhh honey, you alright?"

❧ him being met with your pouty face looking up from the mound of pillow you had it buried in

"i don't wanna talk to you. you did this to me!"

❧ he's about to question you before you throw your legs off the side and go to stand...only to go tumbling over before ted leaps across the room to save you

❧"your hero," he's smirking down at you, hands around your back and hip as you dangle mid-air

❧ "...more like my murderer." you murmur it out

❧ "oh and who exactly did i kill? you look alive to me."

❧ "MY WHOLE LOWER BODY YOU BIGDICK ASSHOLE!"

(bonus)

you two definitely fuck at jschlatt's during margaritaville

❧ setting it up with schlatt bc you promise him a gift (WINK)

❧ you jump out and surprise them when they get to schlat't's place

❧ him almost tackling you this time

❧ "i fuckin' told ya! HA mother fucker now you owe me $50!" schlatt's laughing maniacally as usual

❧ ted fucking you in front of schlatt as a thank you for the surprise

❧ "this is way fuckin' better than on facetime." (read my other work to get the refrenceeeee)

❧ making you ride him as schlatt records it on ted's phone

❧ reverse cowgirl to get good angles of your pretty face and so ted can watch your greedy hole swallow up his big cock

❧ schlatt shoving the camera in your face when you start getting sloppy, thighs burning from riding your lover for so long

❧ "go on and look at me, angel," he's using his free hand to grip your throat to look at him but your eyes are still closed

❧ ted's interrupting him for a second, "do ya wanna cum? keep on bouncin' then. I'll rub your slutty lil clit if you keep takin' my dick so good."

❧ "be a good little bitch and smile for the camera—thaaaaat's it, honey."

[icarusredwings]

Sleep over

A mini miscommunication fic ft. Moonspider and an abandonment episode from his dear friend Wade. Also ft. Hot dad Logan. If that even matters-

No tw.

*Peter Parker and Wade, texting*

Spidey: Yeah that was really cool especially seeing as I thought id have to take you to the hospital again

Wade: Right!? Who even knew you could drive a motorcycle with your legs ripped off?

Spidey: haha yeah. Hey, going to hop off a little early.

Wade: Was it something I said?

Spidey: No, no Im just beat and Jake's spending the night

Spidey, Error. Not sent: He's back from London for a bit so he needs some spider snuggles lol

Spidey: See ya Wade. Goodnight 🕸🛌

Wade, now complaining to Logan: Can you believe this?!

Logan, wearing his reading glasses: Hm? Oh is it the text tone thing? Here let me see *takes the phone and reads the messages* Ha.. is he saying he's webbing himself to bed? With that little emoji there?

Wade: Yes! b-but thats not the point! (God youre so hot when you act like a dad)

Logan: mmh.. well I am a dad. So.. but if thats not the problem what is? It's friendly tones, wade. Im sure he's just beat. I mean he did practically spend the entire day with you..

Wades: Whats that supposed to mean!?

Logan: 🤨

Wade: ....yeah okay.. but that weirdo is over there! What if he needs help!? Im going over there!

Logan: *sighs* Wade, Peter is a grown man.. He can do what he wants, bub. You can't protect him forever.

Wade, already getting dressed: The fuck if I can't!! No one hurts my special boy! Not even me!

Logan: Wade, ive literally seen this kid throw an entire 18 wheeler like it was a pebble. He'll be fine. Besides, maybe this will be good for him. You did say he was struggling with girls-

Wade: Gasssp!! Lolo thats not nice. Even I know that. Peter can have any girl he wants, they just aren't his MJ. Thats why im here. Duh. Im his Marvel Jesus and he needs me.

Logan: *groaning ridicloudly hot by just existing* What ever you want, babe. But this might ruin your friendship with him. Maybe he spent all day with you because he knew you'd get unnecessarily jealous.

Wade: i-Im not jealous!! Im just gonna make sure hes okay! Thats what friends do!

Logan: Whatever you say sweetheart... ask me youre kinda being a cockblock-

Wade: Thats the point!! Now bye! Ill pick up chinese on the way home. He lives next to that one place and that lady adores me!

Logan: the one that says 'please leave me alone and dont ever come back you cursed demon'?

Wade: No, thats the other place.

Logan: mmh.. my mistake.. Don't loose any limbs. And don't make anyone else loose any limbs either. No stabbing, dont get shanked by that homeless guy on the subway. Still confused how he keeps getting away from the cops...

Wade: this is new york sweetie, theres gotta be at least one stabber on the loose at all times. You know, to keep the people on their toes! Anyway- Ill be home soon! Gotta go stab a hoe!

*slams door*

Logan, alone, reading: *sighs, again* ... I just told him no stabbing...

*At Peter's apartment*

Peter, opening the door: Wade? What are you doing?

Wade: I came to save you!

Peter, rubbing his eyes: From who??

Wade, pushing past him into the appartment: You know who!!

Peter: *Groans annoyed and tired* Do you really have to do this tonight?

Wade: Yes!! Now where is that knock off batman fuck?

Peter, mentally: batman ?? *imagines a man with a bat who hits people with said bat* 'im bat man!'

Peter: What? Nevermind.. just.. don't wake him up. *gestures to him passed out on the couch*

Snkt, laying on his chest: *licking him and wagging his tiny tail*

Moonknight, sprawled out, waist webbed to the couch so he dosn't roll off: heh.. Layla.. stoopp.. ZZzzz

Wade, realizing just how bad he assessed the situation: ...... Whos Leia?

Peter, smiling softly, making Wade keep his distance: Layla.. shes like.. his Vanessa.

Wade, immediately changing mentalities: Nessy??

Peter: Mhm.. It's kinda complicated having multiple people in your body that want different things soooo....

Wade, dumb: Soooooo???

Peter: So.. it makes sense to have multiple partners.

Wade: But.. but he lives in London and hes always gone. Thats not fair to you..

Peter, semi sorrowful: Yes... but Lady Death is always gone too. And you still enjoy your time with her right?

Wade: My mistress? My eternal wife thats destined to be mine once god finally lets me kick the bucket? Of course. I think about her all the time.

Peter: ...He's kind of like my lady death. Except I don't know if we'll end up in the same place... but its fun to be along for the ride of life you know?

Wade: Thats some deep shit.

Peter: Mhm..

Wade: well... alright. Fine.... b-But what if he hurts you??

Peter: I'll just web him to the wall until he calms down. It was his idea to web him down in the first place. It won't be the first time, Definitely not the last... and you know? He's not as scary as what people think. If anything he's just... scared of Himself. Like a poor dog waiting for someone to take him home who wont return him the moment they find out he has teeth...

Wade, smart: Oh... OH!

Peter: Shhh. What is it?

Wade: He's your wolvie.

Peter: What?

Wade: He's like your wolvie!

Peter, thinking: Huh... Yeah I guess you're kind of right. Now if you don't mind I have a shift tomorrow.

Wade: Mmmh... Im still worried though... i dont know why..

Peter, putting a hand on his shoulder: Wade, You aren't worried about me. You're worried im going to replace you. But that's not ever going to happen. You're funny, a great friend, and- No offense but- Like the craziest guy ive ever met. No one could replace that.

Wade: What about the joker?

Peter: Who the hell is the joker??

Wade: Nevermind. Wrong franchise. B-but are you sure? That you don't need my help??

Peter, slightly annoyed but in that fond way: I promise to call you If I ever feel like I need help.

Wade, feeling better: ..Pinky promise?

Peter, sighing, knowing how much He needs this: Pinky promise... now get out of my house before I throw you out myself.

This scene ends with Wade laughing, a hug, and wade leaving. Jake sitting straight up mid sleep, staring at him with concern, possibly from a nightmare, and peter reassuring him he's fine and can go back to sleep. And Logan having half cold chinese with his husband on the couch, glad that Peter is so understanding about Wade's abandonment issues.

[lynn-tged-posting]

tged webtoon ep 161 spoilers with thoughts below the cut u know the drill

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THIS IS MY FAVORITE PANEL OF JAVIER EVER. IN THE ENTIRE MANHWA IM LOSING MY MIND HAHAHAHAHAHA

HE JUST LOOKS SO FUCKING UNHINGED I DIDNT EXPECT IT AT ALL HHAHAHAHAHAAAA

anywayy back to the top

honestly maybe i shouldve seen the fact that his own singing would fuck him up coming LMAO

their matching dazed expressions when they both realize PLEASSEE LOL

raphael also calls the start of his singing demonic sounding lmao

and then they start fighting again and JESUS holy shit they're so overpowered this is so cool to watch and also as i was reading i was VERY scared for javier

genuinely i really really love whenever they draw action scenes they look very cool while also not being terribly hard to follow i like that

like oh my god?? he's swinging that hammer around like its nothing its very very terrifying, esp cause its been a while since javier has fought something thats his match yknow, or at least it feels that way

AND THEN. THE LEADUP INTO THE NEXT SCENE IM LOSING MY MIND JAVIER YOU SCHEMER

the feigning being down and then the peek and the slow getting up im giggling so so bad AND THEN

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHA JAVIER YOU CLEVER ASSHOLE I LOVE YOU SO FUCKING MUCH

like i knew that line raphael said about how the halo would continue protecting him so long as he's pure and just or whatever would come into play BUT I DIDNT THINK JAVIER WOULD BE THE ONE TO DO IT SO DIRECTLY TOO HAHAHAHAAA he's learned so much from lloyd <3 LOL

i also think its interesting that the halo keeps track of this with like points or smth, not much to say about it i just think its an interesting gear; the ultimate defensive tech but it's based on how "good" you are thats just really interesting to me hehe

ALSO ALSO i think it's really really silly funny that raphael was this very intimidating and menacing figure that was super scary right up until the moment javier played dirty and then the moment that happened that image/vibe immediately crumbled WAHHAHA he's just a silly guy and the halo does the work i like him a lot

i really like these panels of them being evenly matched, raphael is still holding his own even with a penalty like that, their expressions here are really good too its so tense,,,

AND THEN LLOYD BEGGING THEM TO STOPP AAHHH

AGHHGHGHHGHGH AAAHH JAVIER STARING WIDE-EYED AT LLOYD IM CURLING AND SHRIVELED ON THE FLOOR

like okay i know lloyd is scheming or whatever. but my heart wants to believe that some part of this was very real okay . let me cope let me believe this . one cannot act/lie effectively without some of it being real. RIGHT???

AND THEN WHEN THE POPUPS APPEARED I STARTED SHOUTING OH MY GOD I FORGOT ABT THE RP SYSTEM IM SO. LLOYD YOU BRILLIANT MOTHERFUCKER YOUUU

HE CAN JUST SKIP THE PROCESS AND THEN BECOME A SWORDMASTER HE HASNT DONE THAT IN A LONG TIME OHHHH MY GOD

also. everyone else's bonus RP was +10. but only javier's bonus RP was +45. which could mean nothing.

WHAT DO I EVEN SAY ABOUT THAT LIKE. JAVIER WHAT YOU. WHAT. YOUUU im gonna lose it im gonna LOSE IT

top ten photos taken moments before disaster HE LOOKS SO EVIL THE ART HERE IS SO GOOD HAHAHAHA OHH MY GOD

and how he says "YEEEEEEEESSSSSSSSSS" ohhh lloyd you asshole you i love you so much

THIS PANEL TOO LIKE WOW THE FUCKING EFFECTS THIS IS INSANE HE LOOKS SO FUCKING MENACING THE VIOLENT LINEART HES POWERING UP HIS SINGING OH MY GODDD HAHAHA

when i saw these panels i immediately thought of that one song from princess and the frog god i wish i could like tween or something itd be so cool to see This drawn to That

thats all i LOVED this ep i had so much fun RAPHAEL JAVIER LLOYD FIGHT PART THREE NEXT WEEK HERE WE GO

[catwyk]

tsv finale spoilers below. i wrote this during my first listen through. its long as fuck. im dead im ruined.

cull calling out to rane instead of faulkner.... rane is truly the real leader now

FAULKNER......

"katabasian rane? sister thurrocks?" im gonna be sick

"hes basically a cow" spit your shit carp

"people in my life keep leavin to serve a cause i just cant understand" BASHES MY HEAD ON THE WALL

"we must love them for fleein from our touch e must not run after them" oh baby :(

this is actually fucking destroying me right now oh poor faulkner. failed by the world.

"of course i recognize you. youre carpenter's ghost" // "yes. i am" // "that must mean that im being punished. arent i?" he sounds so small and young oh my god

"if this is my punishment, then why am i smiling?" OKAY PARALLELS TO HIS VISIONS IN S2. OKAY. IM NOT GOING TO CRY. I WONT.

his monologue is ruining me actually oh god.

"they invented their own faulkner. and they forced me to be him" THATS WHAT IM SAYIN

he called her his sister...

im sure hes gonna die

"you crashed a car??" // "yeeah. i crashed a car." i love her

"they need to fix you, they need to make you better, and ill, ill watch over your bed, ill be there, carpenter. ill pray, ill pray and pray for as long as i need to" christ alive. i need to lay down RIGHT NOW.

méabh de brún too good at acting like shes in pain im abt to dial an ambulance

EM??? EM MENTION. EM MENTION

ok this is fuelling my hc that faulkner reminded carpenter of em in some painful and undefinable way

"i should tell paige that story, if i get to see heg again"

"OUR paige?" CRYING FOR A MILLION YEARS. AND HIS "HUH" AS WELL WHEN CARPENTER CONFIRMS

twin mouths truther forever

"i hate you too, faulkner, i truly do. and i love you, too. in spite of everything" // "always on the very precipice of understanding one another"

faulkner's "DEAD, DEAD, DEAD!" is fucking me up b narr the voice actor everrr

SHES GONNA LEAVE HIM A CAIRN 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

"there'll be a place for you, and itll be beside me" DRIVING STRAIGHT INTO A LAMPPOST AS WE SPEAK

NO HES GONNA TRY AND KILL HER ISNT HE

"yeah. perhaps thats it. do you?" again. coolest fucking character on the planet

"this is when the waters parted, and at last..! at last he understood!" jesus christ. jon ware the writer that you are

"say you were raised in the service of a god of fire. so you feel like the world would be a much better place if more things were on fire" i busted out laughing WHAT a tone shift

"dennis duplace helped. hayward.. dad.. carpenter.. im leaving all of you behind" i am a husk of a person. lucille valentine knocking it out of the park

"best feeling in the world, seeing you walk away" holy fucking shit this is DAMAGING ME.

i wanna write every quote thats making my heart sting but the transcript is already up so theres no real point

every single va is popping the FUCK OFF by the way. i have to keep reminding myself theyre acting so i dont like. kill myself

val saving hayward was NOT on my bingo card what the fuck

"and before she died... she remembered who she was" OHHHHHHH MYYYYY GODDDDDD

hayward doing his own rites of the cairn maiden for himself :(

no gods coming for hayward but "fuck it. this one's not... for any of you. this ones for me"

WHY IS FAULKNER BACK. NONONO ITS ONLY GONNA BE BAD. PLEASE NO

i never realized the parallel between faulkner's gardener father and his gardener god

carpenter meant so much to him :(

"Sister! I love you! Where are you going? Dont turn your back on me! Dont you dare- Sister! I need you! SISTER! SISTER! MARCO! MARCO!" FAULKNER NO NOT LIKE THIS NO NO NO NO NO NO NO

FUCK YOU JON WARE (<- COMPLIMENT)

THE FAULKNER BODY FAKEOUT. SEE ABOVE POINT

carpenter's scream...... oh god.. oh méabh de brún the woman that you are

"he could be a face from my childhood. or his" charlie.......

HES BEEN BLOND THIS ENTIRE TIME????????????? i should have fucking known

"but no matter how it starts, no matter how it turns out for us, it can end with love, cant it? it can end with love. it can end with kindness." i said oh my god out loud

the delivery of "and then i let him go" why not just drive a railroad spike through my lungs

"the river is vast, and no dam can block every channel, and ours is a world of miracles." i said jesus christ out loud

i wheezed when she just. got back up this old bitch cannot die can she

not nana glass' song............

FUCKING TAINSLEY. CHEKHOVS TAINSLEY.

oh my god. a final heartbreaking credits scene

i had to just sit and lean back for a second. what a fucking ending. what a fucking podcast. this is one of those pieces of media that takes up residence in your brain forever. im never gonna stop thinking about this

[jwritestuff]

older brother behavior

warnings: drinking mention (nothing graphic)

- summary: younger gn!reader meets a pretty girl, dean and sam are protective!

also: this is my first fic. i have no clue how to do this. feedback is appreciated!

dean and sam go to the bar every friday. i don't know, tradition? but i stay back. i'm not a drinker honestly. i would much rather stay at the bunker curled up with a good book. that’s definitely my kind of night.

my brothers practically begged me to go to the bar with them. they need a ‘good luck charm’ for their pool game, or whatever they call it. so i went. they don't listen to the word ‘no’.

i’m knee deep. knee deep in a new book i'm reading. exactly 237 pages in. dean and sam are playing pool, shouting whenever possible. they are definitely drunk. mid sentence, i feel a hand on my shoulder.

"hi."

oh my god.. she's so.. she has black curly hair and deep brown eyes.

"hi." i mutter. taking her in. (how do you calmly greet a hot girl?) 

"i'm charlotte" she looks at me so intensely. like we could for sure kiss right now. 

"i'm y/n." i smile, trying my best to flirt. "come, sit" i point to the seat across from me.

"what are you reading?" she asks.

and i love her already. "oh! um.. its a book about a teenage alcoholic, not my usual genre but i love this auth-" dean comes up next to my chair.

he wraps an arm around me. "hey kid! who is this?" he asks, raising his eyebrows.

I give him a pleading look that says, ‘please dont embarrass me’. 

"dean, this is charlotte. charlotte, this is dean. one of my brothers" 

"hi!" she says so sweetly may i add. i look at her for a split second, mouthing ‘im sorry’ and giving her an apologetic smile. she waves me off like it's nothing and my oldest brother isn't about to humiliate the fuck out of me.

"ah, charlotte. so what are your intentions with our y/n?" charlotte, thankfully, laughs at this.

"dude shut up" i lightly slap his arm. "go back to pool, i think sam is moving the balls around!" that gets him.

"oh shit. ok well, y/n stays right here. don't take them anywhere i can't see them" he bumps my shoulder and winks at me. i (half) playfully roll my eyes.

he finally walks away. i give charlotte a desperate look. "oh my god. i am so sorry. him and sam, my other brother, they're insanely protective when it comes to me. especially when it comes to me and girls."

she laughs. "don't be sorry! it's really sweet how they care. have you had bad experiences in the past or..?"

"not really. they kinda get all parental when i'm sad. they've seen me heartbroken three times now, so i think they're trying to avoid another one of those meltdowns."

she looks apologetic. "heartbreak is the worst."

"cheers to that" i say. holding up my.. water. but, she laughed, so i'd say thats a win.

right when i look up. i see sam. 

"hey kiddooooo" he draws out. oh god. he's for sure drunk. 

"just needed- just wan- to see what you're reading!" he's doing his best to pretend to be interested in my book, but i know better, he just wants to be sure my choice of woman is acceptable. looks at charlotte then looks at me. this goes on three more times. he mouths 'good taste' and gives me a thumbs up. i roll my eyes. "okay you can go now! thanks for checking in, i'm fine sam."

he walks away. he also winks. jesus christ get me out of here. 

"that's sam, i assume?" charlotte takes me out of my head for a second.

"uh.. yeah. again-"

"do not apologize. please. it's really adorable." so she's already picked up on my need to apologize for anything and everything. wow.

"okay." i look down, blushing. she breathes and i feel like i'm having a stroke. how is she so perfect?

"give me your phone." she says.

so of course, i hand her my phone. she says, "i'm putting in my number and following myself on instagram. that okay?"

i wanna kiss her so bad right now. just realized im staring at her lips. "i.. yes. that's perfectly okay."

she hands me back my phone. "i'll be sure to text you." she gets off the chair and comes extremely close to me. holy sh-

i'm staring at her lips again. she definitely realizes that by now. i just nod, speechless at this point. (how does she do that to me?)

she tucks my hair behind my ear and cups my face to kiss me. i kiss her back. obviously.

so yeah, i just died!

she pulls away after a minute or two. 

"see you y/n." she smirks. SMIRKS.

"bye charlotte." i say. (i've never been so red)

i turn back to my book, taking a breath. what just happened?

i was going to continue reading (not really, just think about charlotte) when i hear dean and sam whistling at me. i put my finger to my mouth, because, why are they so loud. they come back to give me a high five. i gladly accept their gesture this time.

"can't believe our little sibling got to makeout with a girl in a bar. their first time being in one. and they brought a fucking book." sam looks at dean with wide eyes. i can't say i don't agree, i didn't bring a book here to kiss a girl. but if that's what works, i'll take it.

"proud of you kid. no dates until i properly meet her. and that doesn't include you guys sucking each others' faces two feet away from us." dean says. i get off my chair and start to walk out with both of them. i'm starting to like bars.

[godfistgonnalive]

please ramble as hard as you can about pruita I need to hear what you have to say about them

grabs you by the shoulders very roughly.

ok. my favorite flavor of pruita is utterly unrequited. cuz its very funny to me. my fav thing to do is listen to music and think about unrequited pruita like L imagine 😹😹but also its kind of sad and i like how its sad but also funny

like think about the prussia cleaning game like omg.... he loves him.... its so silly.......

PRUSSIA STROKED IN HAPPINESS! WHAT THE FUCK! GAY!

and he literally was imaginging them like together on some sort of boat idk what its called like ugh

and the fucking BLOG. ive already posted these before but. my god.

he likes him so much....... its unbelievable........

like are you serious. he so very obviously has a crush on him THERES SO MUCH PROOF OF IT AND [im trying to restrain myself here from being salty about prucan shippers so i will stop myself here.]

ok im racking my brain to try and think of what to say rn cuz as much as i say i wanna talk about my ships i know deep down in my heart i dont have much to say that i can turn into coherent thoughts.

back to my thoughts and not canon content. unrequited pruita. like ok you know that hetalia itself is just gerita fanfiction. like i love gerita. who doesnt. and thats where it comes in in my version of pruita. like prussia is so in love with italy and italys like omggg germanyyyy :3 like. oh my gfod can i talk about the songs i associate with them. the answer is yes i cant be stopped.

ok puppy princess by hot freaks. fucking UGH. unrequited big fat crush ANTHEM right here.

ARE YOU FUCKING SERIOUS. prussia is the goofy friend... prussia loves italy...... and italy loves germany........ my goodness.........

NO OTHER HEART BY MAC DEMARCO. THIS IS LITERALLY PRUITA.

i love gerita truth pruita so much but not in the love triangle way like i mean thats what it sounds like but its more like a fucked up triangle like

it doesnt connect all the way... cuz in love triangles dont they usually like compete!>>! like prussia loves italy but in my pruita brain he wouldnt like.. actually really try to get with italy while he knew that germany was trying to get with him.... you know.... he wouldnt do that to his brother..... so he just keeps his crush to himself.... rip.... and thats the fun of it ! ! ! he yearns but he'll never have him... love that

LOVERS ROCK. BY TV GIRL. THIS ONE LYRIC. JESUS CHRIST.

TRYING TO SELL YOU SOMETHING THAT YOU ALREADY HAVE. UGH.

AND LOOKING OUT FOR YOU BY JOY AGAIN. ARE YOU FUCKING SERIOUS.

IM GONNA GO CRAZY!

and peach scone. by hobo johnson.

ltierally every time... prussia calls italy cute.... god......

now. onto requited pruita.

i think theyre silly cute so much so much :3 :3 :3 hold on gotta check pixiv so i can formulate thoughts. ok like i mostly think about prussia's side of things when it comes to required pruita but in my opinion prussia is CRAZY about that man. jesus christ. and italy thinks hes super silly and loves him 🫶🫶🫶 HOLD ON I SHOULD FILL OUT ONE OF THOSE UNDERSTAND NMY SHIP THINGS HOLD ONNNNNN

got a little lazy but you understand.

i think thats all i have to say . i feel like i didnt really say much just put images and then said something along the lines of "jesus christ" or "what the fuck" but i think you undestand. thank you for asking. PEACE AND LOVE!

ALSO WAIT I HAVE MORE. i LOVE gerita marriage. they are so married. and i love thinking about prussia watching the boy hes had a big fat crush on for god knows how long get married to his brother. LMAO! and hes like crying like hes happy for his brother,... but oh man........ LMAOOOOO

i love prussia so much. make him suffer now

ok thanks for reading :heart:

edit:i just realized onm the height thing onm the ship chart i forgot to put 6 CM and instead put 6 M. oops

[caravandre]

i thought i was going in prepared but i was not prepared cw for talk of shootings because thats what the movie revolves around.

obviously no i am not a tcc person nor do i condone shootings i feel like i shouldnt have to say this but alas. anyway if you choose to keep reading please do so with caution and stay safe

this movie was recommended to me by an old friend of mine and i decided to give it a try. it's on youtube for freebies and it's relatively short, just 80ish minutes, so i figured i'd watch tongiht and .fuck. i've watched zero day as well and honestly ive always considered that movie to be really well done in terms of its style and the message it's trying to convey, but yk. i cant really be vocal about it since tcc freaks are all over it like ants or perhaps flies. anyway i went into this movie knowing that the subject matter was similar to zero day but i was genuinely not prepared for this at all

i think a lot of it comes from identifying way too much with matt. theyre making a student film about getting revenge on a gang of bullies, and theyre the kind of kids that are like. really aggressiveand violent with it idk thats the best way i can describe it. and i feel like.. the red flags were there but people just didnt clock it until it was too late. and by then, like. the damage was already done. and i know saying 'oh i relate to matt' is suspicious but i mean it more in the way of how he just straight up loses his grip on reality. and how he doesn't even notice until it's practicallytoo late for him. and when he does notice it's so clear how frightened he is. and maybe im just hella projecting but i think the bullying they faced affected matt really badly and his escapism was through movies. he's got shit like uhh. pulp fiction, requiem for a dream, thats all shit that was posters in his room. and then he's making logos for his film that are riffing off of other films, like back to the future, and star wars, and shti like that and. owen talks about how matt acts like he's in a movie all the time, cameras or not, being totally fucking crazy like he's acting in a movie and how he doesnt know when matt is being genuine or if he's just acting, and. jesus man that hit home. like i think a lot of it is just that i have Movie Autism i fucking love moveis and so seeing all the movie references made me really relate to this guy but also the fucking escapism that devolves into delusion and being unable to separate that from reality and not even knowing who you really are anyomre. that part hit home i think. and i just look back on how fucked up i was as recently as a year ago and i think to myslef thank god i noticed. like, thank god i was able ot realize what was happening before i totally lost my grip on reality. because the part where he realized that he fit the exact definition of the way dave cullen described real life shooters that i will not name (they read an excerpt from that book! with permisison from cullen himself. idk i just think it's interesting and says a lot about the writers of the film that they reached out to thewriter and asked permission to read an excerpt in their movie. idk) and the fucking genuine emotion when he says that to owen and then owen just does not care what if i started sobbing right now

im surprised at how. idk. theres a scene at the end where he does kill someone, and i was expecting it to be like a total bloodbath (again, my only frame of reference is zero day which i havent watched in. idfk a year) but no. and yet somehow it's so much more impactful than the end of zero day. because he starts chasing after his friend and when he has him cornered and owen is fucking frightened and genuinely i think matt just doesnt Get It. he doesnt understand. and he goes 'what are oyu doing? its me!' adn fuck dude i know im reading way too far into this but like . hes saying that hes been like this the whole time! and hes confused why owen changed on a dime ebcause to himthis is the next logical step!! fuck!!!! and the worst part is i knew it was fucking coming adn yet i was telling myself no way. no way.

will i watch it again? probably not the whole way through, because i did just straight up start sobbing (and i've only cried atlike. two movies? three maybe?) and it fucked me up. but my god that movie was fantastic. if you're comfortable with the material it goes over and are able to stomach it, i do highly recommend it. fuckin hell what a film

[weirdcat1213]

YEY THE HORRORS i mean YEY THE BOOKCLUB :D

thoughts on volume 6 (oh boi we're almost halfway someone hold me pls)

chap 1:

-OH MY GOD ITS HIM I FORGOT ABOUT HIM FOR A MOMENT (not in general, ik he's in 98)

-HEY HIS WINGS MAY BE CREEPY BUT THEYRE ALSO BEAUTIFUL TO ME >:[

-HOWEVER i love how yeah they are scared af but also get that vash as a person is not bad and they don't leave his side

-WHY ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT YOUR BF LIKE THAT STOP STOP STOOOOOP. IDC THAT HE IS A LITERAL LASER CANON HES STILL JUST A LITTLE GUY

-are we...supposed to notice how bad the state of the gun is or...?

-nono brandon is right, i would also not give good guns to cops

-vash i fucking swear-

-SHUT UP YOU FUCKING COP >:[

-BRO WTF

-YEAH BRANDON CALL HIM OUT

-MY FAVORITE WEIRD CREATURE IS HERE

-ok in my 1st read didnt get that, idk why but i was confused about meryl getting worried for some reason. but she has a (sad) point. will one day the ptsd related to violence and guns be enough to make vash not shoot his gun? shes asking an interesting question. shes literally asking how much can vash take imo.

-wait so...was the replacement gun...the one in stampede??? (i will compare them later)

-DONT LOOK AT ME WITH THOSE GENTLE EYES MAN CMON

-I didnt notice he took the punisher lmao

chap 2:

-:c wolfwood having nightmares its not even a hc, IT IS CANON

-NOT THE FLASHBACK OF VASH CRYING BLOOD OUCH NO PLS NO

-:c im not even mad at wolfwood calling vash a monster cuz it must be fucking TERRIFYING but it still hurts :c

-you could...but youre not gonna

-"so yeah you cant be there for every problem in the pla- HOLD UP WHERE ARE YOU GOING"

-lmao meryl is like me fr

-this time i got most of the fight but i think we can all agree the mpv was the table

chap 3

-YEY LEGATO IN THE.....metal handbag?

-YES ELENDIRA FUCKING READ HIM

-OH MY GOD HES HERE HES HERE OH GOD NO

-i remember i was so confused i didnt realize THATS HIS FUCKING TONGUE

-also did double fang kill trail of death?

chap 4:

-OH I LOVE THIS SCENE SM. i also hate walking in a place with a shit ton of people

-YES IT IS BABY, THATS THE SAME CHILD YOU [so so redacted] WOOOOOOOOO (i love this chapter)

-oh...yeah that...oh

-"we cant survive without her power, neither can you" dude...dont...just dont

-ah yes. the hair. yeap. just a cool artistic decision. yeap.

-also i forgot how fucked up the last run was here

-oh he felt it, i saw that in his eye

-oh so he also went apeshit....ohhhhh. ok so if vash went apeshit cuz of a physical fight or flight reaction (I THINK) did knives go apeshit cuz of hate? the physical need to kill people in revenge? nice

-BRO WDYM "why not just end this crusade?" YOU JUST SAW WHY HE WOULD NEVER END IT

-oh that was his last straw. one thing is him being tricked by a human but that lie affecting his brother? the one thing he's trying to protect (yes ik he's not doing the greatest job at it) from humans? yeah no you gotta die

chap 5:

-NO. NO. NONONONONONON NOT THIS CHAPTER NO

-I HATE THE METAPHOR ALREADY (i love it. i want to yell at nightow my thoughts about it. i will never be normal about it)

-pls no. im begging you. pls dont make me read this again. this is when my sanity starts to break into little raggedy pieces of paper

-i just notices this change happens cuz he got HIS MEMORIES BACK WHAT IF I ENDED IT ALL

-i dont want to read anymore

-its just. so fucking hard. like ik we say hes jesus. but at the same time jesus never felt like that. jesus was born without sin but in vash's eyes he is full of sins and no one can forgive him. bro, honey, god would forgive you anything. you are his favorite im sure. but no matter the arguments for the allegory vash can never be jesus cuz he carries the pain of his "sins" everyday PLUS THE ONES FROM THE HUMANS. idk. im sad and tired. my baby. its ok i forgive you. and im sure rem forgives him. im sure. im sad

-anyway, back to the kinda normal thoughts

-also i think vash thinking he has to forgive himself is kinda flawed. like instead of forgiveness he has to accept what happened and i think those are different things. ofc yeah july was messed up but he never intended to do it. idk

-ANYWAY

-huh, those speakers look like eyes

-cant even swallow in misery in peace anymore lmao

-:c not the day drinking

-i think thats vash talking but yeah....nothing is easy for my guy. hes kinda right, better than crying ig...

-i prefer spike-isms but i will also take needle noggin-isms thank u

-that man can move in such unnatural ways *hears the uncanny vash people cheer at a distance*

-oof, the ptsd got meryl

-also the question is not whether vash was going to take the bullet or not, the real question is how hard does that question makes me cry

- SHUT UP SHUT UP SHUT UUUUUUUUUUUUUP

-OOF, i mean i 100% get meryl but OOF

-also YES THATS WHAT I FUCKING MEAN. AND I READ THIS ON [redacted] A FEW WEEKS AGO. THE BALANCE BETWEEN EXTREMES ITS JUST NULL, ITS NOT A COLOR AT ALL. his love and faith in humanity vs the pain they cause him...that balance creates a colorless emotion and IM SAD ABOUT IT.

-i hate that final page. i fucking hate milly protecting meryl from her memories while comforting her while protecting her from the rocks, i hate the people still insult vash even when he was long gone, i hate to see the children who saw the same thing as their parents try to convince them to stop because they know vash would never hurt people on purpose only to be ignored..and more than anything i hate vash apologizing for something he has no control over.

-ALSO I ALSO FEEL LIKE CRYING VASH-

[let it be on the record that i needed a minute to continue with the volume]

chap 6:

-OH NO IT STARTS

-"how could i have known?" youre telling me you spent years studying yourself and other plants and never saw one with black hair? really? (im not saying its a plot hole, im saying he was too distracted being a dick)

-so that was his imagination im assuming

-TESLA MENTION WE WIN

-OH GOD OH NO PLS GET ME OUT OF HERE NO PLS NOT THIS

-i love her dialogue with the funny glasses lmao, she really was the only mom ever

-oh..here come the tears

-oh right..they used to be like this

-oh...oh god

[nerd-at-sea5]

the last s2 chaos dump post. spoilers ahead

also i think i just lost my shit while watching this ep

oh all of his joy is abt to go away SO FAST

FUCK WHAT DID SHE JUST SAY????

LOTTIE BABES PUT DOWN THE POISON-

shauna. shauna. SHAUNA.

van tai nat the judge-y lesbians of all time <333

yeah lisa's dying.

TAISSA'S LITTLE THUMBS UP IM DYING I LOVE HER SO MUCH

hate to say it but misty's right lottie pls get some therapy

nat defending her wife (kinda?)

'we got over it' *taissa's head tilt* oh nat honey none of you got over it

oh my god the look of terror when misty tells lottie nat drew the queen

MISTY STOP FUCKING SMILING WTAF

SHE NEVER WANTED THIS!! THEIR MAKING A GOD OUT OF A GIRL WHO DOSEN'T EVEN KNOW WHAT SHE'S DOING!! AAAAA

ok technically shauna started the cannibalism

nat....MISTY STOP LYING WTF OH TAIVAN :))

#letnataliescatorcciodecksomeone1996

ok no give him time to greive.

....at least their taking off his clothes first?

thank you natalie

HAND SHAKING HAND SHAKING. REMORSE OR WANT???

do not. do this. while fucking. blindfolded.

and after all of it, van is still squimish about blood....gonna sob

van is making some painfully good points rn

she's dulling down the knifes...SCRATCHED OUT EYES.

jeff YOU are on tv...callie's facial expressions alone i love her-LMFAO SHE KNOWS EXACTLY WHERE THE GUN IS-

KILL THE CREEPY COP!! LET THE WILDERNESS DECIDE IT.

nat's trying to protect lisa....she's so dead!!! oh my god nat and lisa im gonna s o b

BEN BAD FUCKING TIMING ALSO GOOD GOD THATS A LOT OF BLOOD-

he wants to go with her because he think she's not like them but she wont let herself go with because she thinks SHES WORSE.

van's minor case of insanity should not be as hot as it is.

ok she's phrasing it weirdly but she has a point

walter's gonna kill kevyn.

HAHA I KNEW IT

'are you one of the cult people' 'no i'm from the shire'

HA JEFFREY.

his heart is so small....OH SWEET FUCKING LORD.

yeah ok ive gotta fast forward that. DUDE IT WAS RAW.

misty i'm rlly not liking you rn

van just kicking the fire ily

FUCK CALLIE NO RUN. OH SHE HAS A GUN. SHOOT HIM.

vannnnnnnnn OH she wants to die-nvm.

it's gonna be nat i stfg and im gonna die

this gives me to much anxiety oh good god. lottie??

NO NOT AGAIN.

SHAUNA????????????

fucking hell.

WALTER KILL HIM.

CALLIE SADECKI GODDAMN

'it was vans idea' *the face of bitch pls*

AYE VAN PRINCESS BRIDE NERD CANON.

ben?

oh lottie-wait i wanna hear van's story....

it's van or nat. nvm it's nat. CALLED IT.

FUCK NATALIE OK-

lottienat pls makeout NOW challange. BOTH timelines.

IM SO SORRY NAT BABE THAT IS THE FACE OF GAY PANIC

ben watching like: i do not understand lesbians, also. i want to die.

nat you want to kiss her so bad, ur also having a midlife crisis at 17

omfg akilah's little curtsy and the way she and nat smile at each other

misty it was cute but the way ur looking at her makes me think you want to kill her

fuck. damnit lisa.

misty if you do this i will forever hate you.

SHIT NAT'S DYING-

yep. misty i hate you. idgaf if it was an accident.

JAVI??

just when she wanted to live. SHES NOT SUPPOSED TO BE HERE.

pls tell me shes got like a tolerance to this stuff?? pls.

SHIT HELLO SOPHIE THATCHER.

IM SHAKING OH MY GOD

'this is exactly where we belong' no, no you deserve to live you just haven't realized it yet.

LOTTIE?!?!!? IM HAVING A FUCKING STROKE

jesus the way she's smiling at her. she just wants to help!!

fuck she's actually dead.

i am so fucking furious right now.

god van's entire face is just 'it's supposed to be me.'

FUCK WHAT THE FUCK WAHT THE FUCK BEN WHAT THE FUCK IT WAS BEN

van palmer i should not find this hot.

VAN GET THE FUCK OUT

hey at least their warm now right

[thegeminisage]

first zelda time ive had all day lets goooo

i decided NOT to explore the chasm rn bc i dont have an easy fast travel point back out :( im sad about it tho :(

BRO THATS LITERALLY ZELDA??????

SHE MADE YUNOBO EVIL???? I GOTTA FIGHT MY BUD???????????????????????????????

girl HELP

OH THIS IS THE FIGHT FROM THE TRAILERS...................................

oh my god. the truth was right there all along

oh damn he's a BEAST. jesus!

got him!!!! buddy come back to me :(

wahhh hes a good boy again

oh his power is COOL. i miss daruk's protection though :(

oh my GODDD you can use recall to travel up these slopes with the sliding boards THIS IS SOOOO FUN

oh my god do i get to just RIDE TO THE TOP IN A MINECART? this is so fucking sick

oh my god??? the crater???

the lava is all gone :( this is so horrible and unnatural what the absolute fuck

GLOOM ERUPTION??

BOSS FIGHT???????????????? HELLO???????????

AIR FIGHT FROM A PLANE?????????????????????????????

"oh boy its real big" YEAH IT IS. i didnt realize i was missing how tiny and insignificant the divine beasts made me feel until now

oh my god that was SOOOO COOOOOOOLLLL

the DIVE down here...incredible

i think i stumbled on this earlier, when i found that heat wall in the depths...this is amazing!!!!!!

yo it is so wild down here. i see lightroot trees just like any old depths excursion...

tried to warp to where it was Too Hot before & immediately caught fire. warped BACK to goron city to sell more shit to get hot pants lol. i wanna travel from this direction bc i think it's closer!!

you'd think the lava would make it easier to see, but the sparks in the air obscure my vision lol

killed my first gloom talus! an igneo talus no less...it was between me and the lightroot so i thought what the hell lol

i made it to most of the lightroot trees i had marked and now i am IN the fire temple! it fucking rules, this is already more kickass then the water temple or maybe even the skyship - i liked the gameplay for those better but as far as presentation goes this one is INNNCREDIBLE.

it's after midnight tho and i'm sick so the rest will have to wait until tomorrow 😭

[allaboutapplesandcheesecrackers]

Yee haw

Fuck off

These Dollhouse windows made of moltov

Cockleshells

My heart swells

Can she spell?

The one im putting her under?

We be Thundercats!

Forgot about the Argo?

Benefit the

Disembargo

Dating culture got us pinned to the ground littered with eggshells

Ghost in the seashell she sells

For more profit than

she can afford her price

To the rise

Of fame

And paradise

But not without a god damn price

So God speed on your brand new vice

Brother- we were molded in the fires

Hellcats flooding from hells choir

Givin me prison eyes

Might as well jump

And matastisize

Canker sore

Outlaw the poor

To feed the machine

Its sacrificial meals

Its sacrificial greens

Yes i do mean monies

Discover the witness

Im not a lyrical witness

Im a vision

So much so-

my vision might fix this

Laughing our asses off raw at the

Comical improv skit shit

Did you sleep through the lesson

Have we regressed from our full potential

Four by four fully loaded jeep chereoke coffin metal

Cant make wine out of wishes

All our hits and misses

You superstitious?

This Quija charchueterie board delicious however, suspicious.

And Jesus?

-He walked with a mission

Hidden psalms lead to hidden secrets

-can you keep it?

Are you sure you're breathing?

Anxiety to stunt the beating

Oh- you think im a curse?!

Thats cute- i felt it first.

I felt it worse!

You can't hurt me when my curse is all ive got

Sex bot spam bot chat bot spell slot sub-plot

For-get me not

Thought youd make me beg- like a dog?!

I think fuck-ing not!

Now you got me praying to my own deity Alanis

-Please bitch come save us

End this shit like dogma

And you oughta know-

It wasnt til you left

That i became religious

Because only God could be this vicious

This malicious

This hungry for god damn bloodshed

This hungry for unhinged madness

Getting his jollies

from being this blatantly sadistic

-And not to be hedonistic

But ill face god

And walk backwards into hell now

Just to get away from this fucking

full-time-fun-time torture show

If only to escape his hubris

But that mary-mother fucker owns hell too!

So dont you ever believe the other side of it-

You know two stories cant co-exist.

He'll raise it just to fit his narrative

Just to feed his insatiable god complex fetish

Oh, aliens are here?

Holy shit- like I care.

You got to beg for scraps or starve

All the lost potential

All the lost potential art

Dying in the minds of those starved

Whats one less doctor right?

Not like we can afford the bills

The pills

The cheap injection thrills

My body is a haunted house

And skeletons are in the walls

Screaming silently as you pace my halls

Clawing violently inside where you cant see

Every part of me

Is screaming

And no one hears me

Its like this room has elle acoustics

But my cries fall on the deaf ears

-of all these humans.

They like to say "hey how are ya?"

And the only honest response I feel

"life is a prison

And every single morning

I pray for deaths sweet release!"

Instead though, ill smile and nod

And lie like its not a crime

"Why yes darling, I feel sublime!"

So get in loser

Weve got nothing left to lose now!

Surrounded by wolves who eventually

bare their fangs

Even in the most convincing of disguises

Humans running low on empathizin

Its like someone gave pinnochio his life

But forgot his soul

Walking zombies

And you know they miss their mommies

Without ever realizing the pain it caused

Just to get through life

Always Smile- without pause

Their image of perfection

Hiding the cracks and tarnishes

Hiding the core of their being

And have you ever thought for once just how long she-

has ignored The Bleeding?!

Not a one of them worth it

In the end

Because when all you want is perfect

But perfect doesnt exist

Youre never ever gonna find a sure fit

In a world claimed by chaos and pure unadulterated madness.

Take one last look in the mirror before

Your last breath is spent in a hospital bed

A l o n e.

[delightfms]

☏

for lottie / apollo, rhodes / apollo, and poppy / ronen :)

lottie x apollo:

"oh fuck.. sorry, i thought i hung up before your voicemail started. jesus. um, i bet you're probably like why the hell is lottie calling me at 3:47 in the morning... i dont really have a reason either... um. well. im out with letty right now.. i've had like a shit ton of tequila actually. i think i really like you.. its not a think actually. i know i really like you. um.. thank you for like.. you've been really sweet. im gonna go now. im embarrassing the hell out of myself. i hope the gods spare me and erase this before it gets to you. mkay bye"

rhodes x apollo:

"oh look at that. it's time for another best friend podcast episode, starring me. get your airpods ready because this one's a doozy. there i was, in theo's bakery to grab lunch when fuckin darrel decides he's going to come in and be an absolute piece of shit, right ? so he comes in and he's like going on and on about how this company would fucking fall apart without him and how i have no idea what im doing and all this other shit, right ?? he doesn't fuckin know im in there. dude, you should've seen the look on his face when he realized i heard every fuckin word that came out of his mouth. what a jackass. i cant stand him. anyway. i'm coming over with dinner later so dont pick something up on the way home. its date night. HA! okay, love you bye."

poppy x ronen:

"hi ! i know you're probably busy but i thought youd want to actually hear this instead of just reading a text. little sami that you visited the other day during your rounds ? the little girl thats been here for what seems like weeks now ? she gets to go home today. she told me to tell the 'guitar guy with the curly hair' that she's really gonna miss him and thank you for keeping her company. seriously though. thank you for coming in and doing this for the kids. i know they really love it and as much as i joke around about you having a fan club here, you really do. you have an amazing heart. anywho. i thought you'd enjoy that little tidbit. i hope you're having a goodnight. talk soon !"

[icarusredwings]

A review of Puppys pen By Panties on boys

Ive done a previous reviews on

Nasty Dog and Domesticated Wolverine and was heavily impressed so here we go.

Firstly I would like to mention that good gravy. 8 THOUSAND words!?? For a one shot? Holy hell. Props.

"Wade squints in the dark, against the yellow halo that hugs his ankle, as he steps through it." I dont know what this part means but I want to assume it means the Tva door thing for when hes traveling and hes just now stepping into a new dimention.

"Are you there god?" No. Not at all.

Ooohh fangy wolvie!

"What time is your dick appointment sir?"

I love the little note of. "That would be dyscalculia" like uhm actually you little shit- Numbers is dyscalculia and you're aboutta get your ass smashed so its not like that matters

"Sorry daddy" As if you didn't just meet this man 2 seconds ago. But same-

"You're late. Thats rude"

Wade: *dies of horny*

Awww! When it says he was vibrating on the floor like that it makes me think of a really excited puppy with his tail going crazy.

Oh my god. We got a collar. Repeat we got a NICE collar at that.

I like how you describe things but in my brain I can physically see him tripping and struggling to get up so quickly.

I didnt read the tags (why would I, I trust this author not to do anything too uncomfy) but if he dosn't get a tail plug im gonna be a bit disappointed.

Puppy play has to be one of wades absolute favorite things by the way. Do you KNOW how many military brats are pups??? Do you see is ex wife over here?? She definitely was making this man bark.

GUYS! WE GOT COMFORT SMUT

“I don’t want to kill the mood.” Wade replies. “I’m not as pretty as you.” Shut the fuck up right now.

"slowly, so slowly, so Wade can stop him if he has to. “I know who you are, idiot. And what you look like.” AYO!? Does this imply that in this universe Logan gets to be dommy toppy to all his lovers and wade is a usual playmate?

Oh my gooooddd

"horrifying thought, I feel like I belong here.

He should probably run." AAKDNSIDJS And literally as a man who has felt like he never belonged anywhere !?? And he ussually does end up running from people who are kind to him? Jesus christ guys.

Chat are you seeing this shit?

Not only does he know him already, hes kind to him, respectful, and LITERALLY says "my clients dont get to touch me" and then INSTANTLY kisses him and tells him BY NAME that he can touch him.

Im going to explode if we find out that theyre actually together in this universe.

“Realized where you are, huh? Who you’re with, huh, baby?” youre gonna kill me.

"Scared sweetheart?" im dead.

HAS HE HAD HIS RABIES SHOTS? Im deceased.

No because wade starting to ramble absolute nonsense while waiting for Logan to stab him in the guts is so accurate. Bro is like "treat me like a half priced vaccume and let me suck it up!"

And logans just sitting here like ???

TEHEEHEHE the flirting is insane

Oh nooo.. i know those indications. The instant familiarity, the testing, the teasing. It's as if Logan had lost his deadpool. Lost his favorite chew toy and now that he got it back he misses him so much. Between knowing exactly what he likes, knowing precisely where to kiss, telling him he knows him, telling him about his pretty eyes, talking to him as if he knows him on a deep personal level... im gonna cry.

Im sitting here talking about how encouraging Logan is to Wade but wade is laying here with multiple injuries telling Logan to keep going. Telling him to bite him. Telling him that its okay to hurt him because hes into it. Telling Logan that hes allowed to LET GO. To go absolutly nuts.

Nooo because its so sad and cute when he gets up and just.. leaves him there. The way I KNOW wades brain instantly went to "oh no he dosn't like me anymore. I messed up" as hes naked as hell, bleeding everywhere as he sits there.. alone. Only to immediately be told theyre going somewhere else.

"Stop humping me" is top tier comment.

HOLY SHIT HE TOOK HIM HOME.

Like.. HOME home. 🥹

Aww what a good boy. Sitting there like that. "Good mutts get rewards" im seriously going to start deteriorating.

GUYS 😭

Wade: I get wolvie dick so this is heaven

Logan: say something nice about yourself

Wade: Chat im in hell actually. Satan himself was tricking me.

"Be a good boy. Don’t you want to?” and he just CANT say it oh my lanta

"He hears them before he registers that he’s the one saying them, and then his lips drop open wider. Who the fuck just said that?" Its your head room mates <3 dont worry they just want you to be a good boy for mr. Wolvie here.

Oh man the biting. These are love bites. These are not agressive biting this is territorial. This is claiming. This is... god its BEAUTIFUL is what this is.

The way he encourages him. The way Logan tells him that he wishes he could mark him. The way Wade keeps going limp knowing damn well if he squirms then logans prey drive will absolutly destroy him.

"He fucks Wade’s own blood into him as lube." Ofc. Ofc.

Hes litterly fucking him so hard that hes crying and wade is having the best day of his life.

Daddy kink logan>>>

"They sit there for a few more moments before Logan asks, voice rough, tired, spent, but amused, “You dead?”

“Yeah.” Wade answers.

“Shit.” Logan huffs a laugh."

Me fr. My wife asks if im dead sometimes and ill tell her yeah and she'll be like "damn. R.i.p."

AAahh and he brings him home!? Its decided. He brought him home to Al and poor Al suffered the consequences for ever.

This entire fic is just "Wade goes shopping for the wolverine with the biggest dick and heart" and found him.

Im not kidding this was SOOO fucking sweet. Would love to read what happens next and perhaps if wade DOES try to get away from him, a bit of primal play and physically hunting down your boyfriend never hurt anyone.

Im genuinely very happy after reading this, my heart is full my chest is warm, My head is full of things it wasn't about 20 minutes ago. And now if you don't mind Im gonna go take a nap.

Solid 10/10. Thank you Kensy.

Anyway @bougiebutchbinch will love this.

Puppy’s Pen

[Deadpool’s voiceover]: You’d think that finding a new Anchor Being would be easy.

I mean, big dog should be effectively immortal, no…? And yet one is dead, one is Henry Cavill—sadly uninterested—and one’s shorter than Woody Allen… on second consideration, I might go back for him, actually. He was cute. Besides, he held quite the fucking candle to the Logan variant that was crucified on a giant, unforgiving X, which was erected on a mountain of human fucking skulls, so. You know. There’s that thing that I witnessed today.

Fact is, it’s been hard.

This whole multiverse idea, it’s honestly just really confusing. The author doesn’t get it, I don’t get it… Do you get it? If you do, hold onto your fucking socks, because I’m about to shatter your entire understanding. Open your mind, okay? This fic is not for prudes, mind the tags.

[hirokiyuu]

Hello! Saw your last post and got me thinking: What do you think Vace and Lin would be like as parents? I imagine that fatherhood wouldn't come to him as easily, but I think he would earnestly try to be better than both his parents 😁

oh yeah absolutely i think post therapy vace is a better dad than his family (low bar) and i think in therapy he has like the self awareness? to try and push past that

actually therapy vace is very fun in general bc like. i think one of vace's qualities regardless of therapy is how he pushes himself to be The Best it's just like a reframing of what The Best is u kno. there's a reason his cards are vace's confidence u kno. and that confidence is in some ways genuinely earned like!!! he IS the best soldier on the helio!!! like!!!! he has all those awards and he's very smart and like. it makes sense!!!

but then he goes to therapy and he starts like. reframing some of his stuff re:being Good and like what it means to be not just Good At Things but a Good Person and like. thats so much more difficult for him u kno in ways that other stuff wouldnt necessarily be. esp bc a lot of the stuff involved is like, him moving to be more vulnerable and show weakness and forgive ppl and those are not things he's good at naturally which is like. just very fun wwww

the reason i bring this up re:his parenting: i dont think he'd want to be a parent until he's really dealt with a lot of the worst of his shit. he mentions this in his 100 right: he's aware his whole thing comes from his dad who he has an IMMESNELY complicated rship w/. (i say this bc like. in his 50 he mentions hating his dad right. and yet he still has a picture of him u kno. lmfao. god) i dont think he'd ever want to subject his kids to what he went thru. i think he's aware of what he's done and how much worse he could've been u kno. the monster under the bed is who he is without sol

and even then it still takes work u kno. this comes up in the endcards abt how on his worst days he's still just like he was and how it takes times to break past that and find someone to meet him halfway. i have him meet lin when he's like early 30's bc i really do think it takes him a Long Fucking Time to hit a point like that. a lot of relationships. u kno. takes Work. takes time.

BUT THE POINT OF THIS.... to answer your actual q..........

i do actually think vace is a pretty good dad in these circumstances! i think he's protective and caring and i think in context w/rship with lin especially where he's got a partner that's good at reframing issues from "you versus me" to "you and me against the problem" it helps him get in that mindset with kids as well u kno.

i think tho in some ways he's better w/them when they're little GLKHSDLKGH i think he might be a bit overprotective when theyre older. i am shy talkign abt lin but im even shyer talking abt the fankids i made for them but i DO think its immensely funny for him to have his daughter hit adolescence and be like. ok im not calling u daddy anymore. and not bc she's embarrassed abt being a daddys girl or antying she just needs him to realize shes practically an ADULT NOW (vace meanwhile is there like. you are Not an adult jesus christ)

ok thats the serious analysis now here is my stuff thats for Me (sparkle emojis) ive talked abt this with alm before and in some ways i think vace is the parent the kids rely on for most every day stuff bc i do think he spoils his kids a little u kno. daughter shows up asking for a snack and he Prepares something for her meanwhile lin is like (gets smth preprepared from the fridge or tells her to wait for mealtime) takes them shopping teaches them to tie their shoes all that kind of stuff u kno

lin meanwhile is like...... practical wwww ive talked abt this in other places but he has difficulty with people sometimes bc of his augment. he's not great at comforting tbh! i think if the kids are upset adn htey want hugs abt it they go to vace. lin tho i think is the parent they turn towards for more serious stuff? bc vace despite everything still is very emotional while lin is very Not that u kno. so they can be like. uh. papa. ive fucked up. and lin is like (guy whose response to literally Everyhting is How Do We Fix This) How Do We F

in some ways as well i think the kids and lin grow closer as they get older. not to say i think they necessarily grow Away from vace but the way you interact w/small kids versus when u interact w/older ones means i think vace would do better w/the really younger ones while there'd be a bit of disconnect btwn them and lin until they're older u kno. lin is bad at mirroring and coddling and part of the thing abt his rship w/vace is it does help him get better at dealing w/other ppl w/strong emotions, part of that also relies on vace understnading that lin is trying u kno. and that's not a capacity kids really have at such young ages?

overall tho. i do think they are pretty good parents wwwww vace does hover too much but lin i think helps him dial it back wwww and lin struggles more at first but he gets there. their kids i think grow up well! and that's what matters!

[inkybinkyboink]

god ok not to say anything sus or weird but like show me the deconditioning of quasimodo. man spent two fucking decades with someone who saw very little

 value in him and only cared for him out of the idea that he would be punished if he didn’t. quasi’s hard of hearing because of frollo, not to mention the amount of abuse he went through and just how fucking demeaning frollo is, how he genuinely treats quasimodo more like a pet rather than a human being. i wanna see the angst of quasi grappling with his past and himself, not knowing what’s okay to do and what isn’t because frollo isnt around to tell him. Esmerelda and phoebus getting dinner and quasi sitting quietly waiting for them to tell him he can take a little bit, but they don’t because who tf instructs their adult friend how to eat, so he assumes he did something wrong, and he apologizes when his stomach grumbles and theyre like “hey man, you can have some food you know that right?” and quasi panics and yeah thats a thing and theres a moment of like “woah ok this is worse than we thought”. teaching him it’s okay to be human, and that he is human, jesus christ why would someone tell you you’re not. oh my god and they show him so many new things, they take him to the beach, and the market, and they properly show him the court of miracles, and hhhhhhh theres a line in the script where esmerelda notices quasi’s hoh and it says like “from here on she makes sure quasimodo can always see her lips when she’s speaking” and what if she tells everyone else they should too, so it’s easier for him to understand everything. everyone being so accommodating to him and clopin realizing quasi speaks a little sign language, and he comes up to quasi one day and starts speaking but also using sign language and its a simple question like “how are you today?” or “hey we’re going grocery shopping, wanna come?” but quasi’s just overwhelmed and overjoyed and he hugs the man out of no where, like the idea of kindness is so solidified in his head as basic human needs, that if someone gives you food, or feeds you, or dresses you, it’s kind and good and not something you should automatically be expected to do if someone needs help with that. esmerelda sewing him nicer clothes, and clopin becoming just a solid good companion to the man. quasi’s definitely a people person and doesn’t like being alone after frollo’s gone, and phoebus and esmerelda are out a lot so he’ll ask to hang around clopin and “i hope im not a bother” and “gosh quasi, you could never be a bother. I had to clean my place up anyways so it’ll be nice to have someone to talk to, you’re always welcome here, okay? you’re a good friend, and a good man, don’t let anyone tell you otherwise” they constantly reassure him and like just ugh he deserves a healthy mental state.