#and the weird disregard for their actual audience

[eastofoktober]

the watcher screw up fascinates me.

on multiple levels it feels like some startup tech bro sweet talked them into it.

first i’m like the entire watcher tv site is 🤨:

like website hosting can be expensive. video hosting on that website can be even more expensive.

having to cover video hosting and fee processing costs on your own website is going to ravage a huge chunk of revenue.

one perk of youtube is that you’re not paying to host your videos. yeah youtube is taking like half of what you make but theyre also not turning a profit either.

also with youtube, the algorithm helps bring in new fans. its hard to bring in new people with your own hosted website (unless you’re planning to partner with a bigger brand…which maybe thats in the pipeline)

and i get it:

producing videos is expensive. highly quality production ones like the ones they seem like they want make (“tv quality” 🙄) is $$$$.

i use to freelance video edit for a mid-level travel youtube channel. one video cost them 30k to make. they would clear 100k in revenue for it but…video production cost at a certain level is insane.

and it seems like they have a pretty loyal network of fans who have been supporting them thus far.

but to say that they’re taking everything behind the paywall is kind of a slap in the face to those who’ve been following since their buzzfeed days.

which is another thing i’m like 🧐 at. because buzzfeed at the beginning was this big millennial magnet for news and media for people who wanted to kind of stick it to the big names in the space.

early buzzfeed days, a lot of film and media people joined up bc they werent finding jobs in the traditional industry. and eventually it became cool to work at buzzfeed because it didnt have the same barriers that traditional media had.

buzzfeed wasn’t sustainable. it relied on a lot of talented people who they couldn’t pay very well and the subsidies of investors who got greedy and ran the well dry when their non-traditional media brand couldnt compete with the traditional. (though it could have been sustainable if it had better management maybe)

so its baffling that these guys who left buzzfeed bc they wanted to break free from the constraints when buzzfeed started as a way to break from the constraints of traditional media but crashed and burned because they couldnt land on the right profitable business model. and now they want to prove themselves as good as traditional television but on their own streaming service???

and id understand it more if they were churning out a lot more content more frequently but it seems kind of unnecessary to have a streaming subscription service when youve got like one show dropping a week so 🤷🏾‍♀️

i wish them the best but this was a bad fumble.

[cuomophobe]

I'm watching the idubbz documentary on sam hyde bc I ended up in a weird reddit hole a few hours ago (this is also how I found out that krispykreme/froggyfresh got kicked out of a charity boxing thing idubbz hosts for being friends with sam hyde) and dear god I wanna study sam hyde and other ott transgressive performers, like gg allin (if he was still alive) in a lab

[ninainthetardis]

Just something I need to get off my chest

I really think that series like Harry Potter and Percy Jackson, fantasy novels with high stakes focused plots addressed to children, should be romance free. They would be so much better without any romance in it.

I mean, as a young reader, I was just there for the action, the magic, the adventure, the plot twists, the plot itself, the characters as individuals, some of their friendships... that kind of stuff in general. I didn't give a sh*t about romance, not even when I grew up and became a teenager. And those are books meant for children and younger readers, right? So, I'm going to share the opinion I had when I was younger (the one I have now would be much harsher, not to mention much longer).

Now, all the romance in HP bored me to death; most of it didn't even make sense. I just wanted to know Voldemort's back story and then proceed to see how they were going to destroy the horcruxes, you know? And yes, I get it, they're teens at that point and it's realistic they have love interests, etc etc etc, except it felt like that author (*insert disgusted emoticon here*) only chose those couples to make all the characters related by the end of the series and none amongst the relationships was really developed to make any sense or look good. Take Hermione and Ron. They'd have zero chances to work irl. Be honest. But mostly, they're lame, boring, casual, rushed pairings with no development whatsoever (thankfully, I dare to add), usually involving characters who are not compatible at all/in the long run.

This is about the canon, but moving on to the fanon ships (Dramione/Drarry), I don't think that that author would have been able to write enemies to lovers properly (I'd add the plus: involving an LGBTQ+ couple, for the Drarry). The sole idea of any of it gives me the ick. Like no. Thanks, but no thanks.

About the PJ ships, on the other hand... they are a mess. None of them is even remotely good. They're all just a total mess, featuring the following problems:

Weird/creepy age gaps

Toxic behaviour

Emotional abuse

Physical abuse

Disrespectful behaviour

Judgemental behaviour

Disregard/dimishment of other characters' trauma

Isolation of characters from other characters they care about/may meet and befriend

Pairings of characters who are not exactly compatible/would never work in long term relationships

Glossing over problematic stuff, which is a big problem considering the audience the books are aimed at

Also, when they get together, some of them are still KIDS. KIDS!

(Fanon ships also fall under some of these points)

In both cases, it's not even like they are necessary to the plot. The funny thing here is that these stories would flow much better without those parts. What's the point of forcing romance into a story where so much is already going on, which leaves little to no space to develop things properly, and in which such romance has actually no purpose?

No romance at all is better than sloppily executed romance. And not every story needs romance in it to be compelling. Especially if they're meant for kids and are full of magic, action and adventure.

A better exploration of the characters and their trauma would have been much more interesting for me to read as kid who became a teenager while the series were coming out, instead of reading cheap romance while the characters were, well, you know, fighting wars and dealing with tons of sh*t.

[nevertheless-moving]

End of The Rope: MDZS AU #8

mdzs au where the junior quartet accidentally activate a rouge cultivator's array and send themselves back in time — post-sunshot, pre-Yiling Patriarch era.

Naturally they seek out Wei Wuxian, the only person they know who might be able to undo the absurdly complex thing.

plot device sidebar: there's a massive yao carcass in the middle of the array — clearly the power source is death based. The four start taking sketches (Mostly Jingyi). Jin Ling swats at a fly, killing it. Eventual cultivation math reveals that the design was ridiculously overpowered. The inventor probably sent himself to the Neolithic era. Hopefully that's — hopefully that's what he was going for because, yeah, this was not designed for round trips. More plot from that later.

Wei Wuxian, currently drinking and pretending that he's avoiding helping with Lotus Pier's reconstruction out of arrogance instead of inability is deeply amused to receive a visit from four miscellaneous cultivators — who he should probably recognize, right? they're the same age as him, wouldn't they have fought in the campaign? I mean his memory is bad but, no his memory is probably bad enough to completely forget these guys. Whatever.

Alright so two Lans, a Jin, and some other sect (Nice guan — sect heir, maybe?) cultivators are here for his help with something important and private that only he can do (weird, but not completely unimaginable. Something too dark for upstanding cultivator's hands?). They really should go to Jiang Cheng for requests, but, eh. He'll hear them out.

They did , in fact, first seek audience with the Yunmeng Jiang Sect Leader for just that reason. They were greeted by the sect leader's sister and, well. No one had the heart to make fun of Jin Ling for stammering briefly, then turning and running away. They figured they could probably find Wei Wuxian somewhere that sells wine. It didn't take very long.

Here's the thing, Wei Wuxian thinks, staring at the four once they are assured of the room's privacy.

These guys, for all their earnest, off-hand flattery, for as much as they addressed him respectfully, could not be less impressed with him.

One second into the conversation and the Jin is ruthlessly mocking him for his corpse bride attendants with a classic Jin sneer. "What, you don't have any living friends to hang out with?" But he's really not scared, honestly, it's not just posturing, which could mean he's stupid but — also he doesn't seem super mean spirited?? Maybe's he's reading friendliness because the tone is so much like Jiang Cheng when he's joking. Kind of disturbing how similar it is. He kindof wants to ruffle his hair.

The Green one is either joining in an admittedly hilarious bit or defending Wei Wuxian? "I think it's nice! Giving the poor souls a chance to — oh, wait — is it supposed to be intimidating? Oh wow, that's kindof sad, isn't it?"

Lan One, also joining in, absolutely no trace of fear (since when were fucking Lans so at ease around demonic cultivation): "Please disregard my companions. I think it could be very intimidating, to the right sort of visitors, Senior Wei." Senior? Am I even older than you?

Lan Two, a little nervy, but also sitting down and pouring himself a drink?!?: "Kindof over the top though right? I mean, this is exactly the sort of thing you're going to be embarrassed by in —"

"Jingyi! You can't just—"

"What! I'm right! This is totally the sort of 'oh look how evil and scary I am' showmanship that he's going to look back on in 20 years and —"

If the complete and utter disregard of his reputation wasn't enough, they brought him a bribe! Spicy, edible, bribes! And wine! Lans bringing him WINE!

It's crazy, it's definitely crazy — but considering all that — he's almost prepared to believe that might actually be who they say they are, once they start explaining.

Wei Wuxian of course doesn't let them explain much — he knows just enough of time travel theoreticals to know that it either explodes horribly or doesn't actually fix your past mistakes. Until he looks over their notes and figures out what kindof time magic it is they should keep any major changes to themselves — seriously Jin you can destroy your soul with this shit. He'll erase his memory if he has to but — fuck.

He wants. He wants the future where no one's scared of him anymore, not really, not to where they can't sit and share a table with him like a normal person. Where he teaches guest lectures to little Lans and Lan Zhan apparently trusts him enough to help take care of his son as a kid (BABY LAN ZHAN SON! LAN ZHAN HOW ARE YOU SO GOOD ! WHAT A PERFECT YOUNG MASTER YOU RAISED!!") And Shije's son makes fun of him with Jiang Cheng's voice and... he wants.

Which double means they can't explain the terrible things they obviously want to tell him because damn he did not expect to live, what, 20, 30 more years?? Wow! Lan Zhan's not even married yet, and his son is probably 20, so, yeah. Lan Zhan would probably have a super long, elegant courtship — no, no don't tell me. His wife has to be perfect, for you to be such an upstanding young growth — I SAID DON'T ANSWER MY QUESTIONS DO YOU WANT TO TURN LOTUS PIER INTO A CRATER?!?!

Identity Confirmation Aside: Headcanon that Wei Wuxian can in some fashion or another do the genetic stesting thing that fierce corpse's apparently do (ala Nie Mingue's corpse in the Guanyin Temple), which is one way he 'programmed' his armies to attack certain clans and leave alone others. Mildly satisfied that drinking the Jin/Jiang blood was enough to scare them — and ugh, she seriously ended up marrying a Jin?? — okay, okay I won't insult your father! Yeesh. Identity Confirmation Aside Aside: The juniors were less freaked about him drinking blood (they've seen him do that before), and more freaked about their young (oh god is he younger than Zizhen) FLAMBOYANTLY CUTSLEEVE uncle licking Jin Ling's wrist and making WAY too intense eye contact. He was going for demonically intimidating but considering they've all seen him 'cleaning' Lan Wanjii's hands for him after getting street food it came off kindof... yeah. Jingyi gleefully plans on using this against them both at some point in the future. Jin Ling adds another bulletpoint to the Wei Wuxian specific trauma list.

Jin Ling Meta From this AU

My MDZS AU Masterlist

[mynameisnotthepoint]

So yesterday, I binged Love in the big city. I had read the book, and as I am wont to do, i skimmed through to get back to the episodes and really sit down and watch them later (hopefully in small increments over the next two weeks).

I have been scrolling around on twitter since then (as one does, I am sick in bed with nothing to do but an assignment I don't have the brain power for right now) and really made me think.

First, I looked at international fans' reactions in English e.g. a gay guy I follow who parties a lot and talks openly about his sex life said it felt real, another guy kept complaining about Go Young's taste in men but also the people who watched it for the romance and only focused on that (and the sex scenes, which have racked up 100.000s of views). Some excitedly writing about how handsome the actors were, how they wanted to see a second season, a shame about this or that plot point (the "endgame" not being there). And as @lurkingshan said, it is NOT a romance drama or even a BL drama. This is a chronicle of one's man's life and his trauma, his relationships and his triumphs.

A lot of English-writing commentors praise the actors for their bravery. And that is always the debate, isn't it? Without them taking the role, this thing might not have been made. But the people behind it, who wrote, filmed, assisted, the writer who is a gay man himself, they all had such high stakes too, even higher (the author kept urging people on twitter to give the drama high views, one of the actors offered free hugs and an eating live stream if they managed to trend at no. 1). The drama is a depiction of a queer person's life as it could happen. Taking on this role, playing the part and then leaving it behind, is that as brave as people who live this life every day? Not to say that none of the actors in this production could be queer, bc some probably are.

One of the people i follow on twitter pointed out this feels like the drama shows queer sex, not sensationalised sex, just, that sex is a part of life so it is depicted in a series that is about life. With reading that, I began to wonder what queer koreans were saying about the series. Thanking the fact that google translate has not yet dropped their support of X, formerly twitter, I began by searching up Nam Yoon Su's name in Korean. A lot of people were calling him handsome, saying they cried about his performance. And then I stumbled upon several things:

1. The club scenes/music they used seems outdated to some Korean queers. They wrote that this feels more like a man in his 30s reminiscing his 20s than someone actually in their 20s, which, fair, the drama is told over the span of like 10 years I believe. Also the commentors thought the dancing was bad. But they said, even if some of it felt not true to gay life/the actors couldn't completely sell it as believable, that the drama was important and shouldn't be criticised too harshly.

2. They were having a linguistic debate about the usage of Korean gay slang (i think it was the word 기갈, but I could be wrong bc my Korean vocabulary is like 30 words) and that it has come into vogue with straight girls who go to gay bars, as Mi Ae does in the drama. In a way, it is a risk bringing a subculture that is/was quite closed to the mainstream (I think similar critiques have been made about drag race).

3. That the drama was not reaching its intended audience (queers) and was instead something for straight BL fans to screech over. It does feel kind of weird that something that veers more into raw territory (if you disregard the casting of Nam Yoon Su, who is super pretty and not at all like Young was described in the book), is treated the same as the stylised/trope-ified human experiences we see in some BLs (nothing wrong with those! Media is in its essence always a distillation of an experience),

I think that there is always a risk of depicting something that is close to the way actual individuals experience it and running into voyeuristic territory, on display for millions of people. Is it weird to want people to take this more seriously? To look at it in depth, treat the characters like humans that could actually be living out there and not Ken dolls you can mash together? Or is that too reductive of me, dictating what other people's experience with media should look like?

These are just my initial thoughts, I need to ruminate on them more, and I could be completely wrong about all of this.

I myself rarely go outside and have not had many queer IRL friends, which is why I am drawn to these series. To be honest, I don't even know the local queer slang bc I have been to the queer bar here once before it closed down due to internal disputes. Reading Love in the big city made me feel like i was hit with a sledgehammer, the series makes me want to go out and live again (once I am feeling up to it).

[kerubimcrepin]

Liveblog: Wakfu Season 1 (episode 19, The Sadida Kingdom)

NOTE: This is the thing I've been looking forward to the entire rewatch. I'm not sorry for my insanity. This entire blog has been built on my insanity.

This translation error in the fansub is the source of the mistaken belief that Amalia's father's name is Oakheart btw. Though it is a nice name.

Two days prior is when The Horror started...

Sadida also have their own Boufbowl tournaments... Big day for Joris hobby lore.

I'M INSANE. I have waited for ages to get here, and I will not be leaving until I have multiple paragraphs of insane things to say:

They have been arguing for a bit of time at this point. Joris does not sound happy about this conversation. Armand also doesn't sound happy about this conversation.

Armand is probably high on his "I am acting in the stead of my father, so you will tell me everything that you need to tell him" supply. Joris is so fucking desperate for Armand to act normal. He doesn't want to be here either. He doesn't need to be arguing with a 17ish year old prince with daddy issues on a weekday.

All of this to say: This level of politeness from Joris always screams to me "I'm so fucking mad right now."

The way he uses the same words, "allow me", almost reads a bit ironic, or like a thinly veiled show of disregard.

Him repeating the information that we as the audience already knew to Joris — which Joris probably also knows, judging from the fact that they have been talking for at least a little bit, — seems less like exposition, and more like Armand treating Joris like an idiot who just won't get it. A power struggle is happening here.

And while it isn't a part of the subs, I can hear him say "my father, the king" which is, in my opinion, yet another little element of psychological warfare going on here.

Basically, he uses a lot of thinly veiled little jabs to establish himself as The Leader.

...He really is high on his own supply.

The mention of the Master of Bonta is interesting. Joris is not just under the King's direct command, — he is also a messenger for other people in the Bontarian government. Perhaps the master in question is connected to the Huppermages?

His exasperated tone here is so customer service-core. Which wouldn't be that funny if we didn't know he also works customer service.

Also, the dramatic "Alas!"... That he definitely added just to seem less rude. While cutting off Armand's last word, as if he was waiting for him to shut the fuck up. Before looking up at him at the end.

The way he's so fucking rude is just so jaw dropping.

"I have an important secret message", "come back later. FUCKASS."

Joris's first instinct whenever things go bad is to go political incident mode and political incident all over the place.

But to be more serious: I think after 600 years of witnessing wars and murder, Joris's mind would go in that direction after seeing Armand's behaviour.

Joris just doesn't know Armand well enough to know that he would not do that, and that he loves his father. It's quite prudent of Joris to get sneaky.

And even if he didn't think of this — you have seen my headcanon for what I think Joris wanted to tell the king (soft oak and that weird xelor that keeps ravaging places). It concerns the safety of the country. And just like Amalia and Eva, I doubt Joris would want Armand to be the one taking care of this.

[guy who made an entire blog thats 33% literally just talking about doomed siblings] I don't know why I like Armand and Amalia's relationship so much. I think I hauve covid. It's just that imagine you were a kid, and your father — who is so, so very powerful, who is the leader of your people, liked your sibling more. And your sibling had this fortunate life, and you were always in the shadow, and people thought you're mean and furless and bal— [I am electrecuted]

Joris behind the columns, trying to stop himself from screaming or trying to actually kill Armand:

I hope he dies. <- I said, before remembering.

If I was forced to work in Joris's sphere, I would literally just end my life instead. The things he subjects himself to...

On the topic of subjecting himself to things, I really think that Joris came so late because:

He was sneaking around like a silly little gumshoe (he was spying on a foreign government),

He needed a break after talking to Armand. <3 Who doesn't

He hoped that this situation wouldn't end so disastrously. Like maybe Armand would get hit a little bit... Just a tinyyy bit. But no. It's worse. Multiple people are down.

He looks so fucking unimpressed with Armand's words here. I can't do this anymore. He hates this shitty teenager.

Magical powers activate! [hits you with a tree stump 16 times until you lose consciousness]

I don't even know what to say besides the fact that the things he subjects himself to (having to defend and talk to royalty who don't even take him seriously and insult him the whole time) are literally unspeakably insane. Could never be me.

He has a lot of anger within him, and for legal reasons, it cannot be expressed.

[nostalgebraist]

declare

Read Declare by Tim Powers recently.

It had some really good individual bits, and was well-written throughout, but overall I found it kind of a slog.

Partly that was just due to pacing, or me not quite being in the target audience, or other similarly ordinary and boring reasons. But, on reflection, I think a lot of my troubles with the book come down to one big, uncommon flaw it had -- which is my reason for writing this post.

----

Declare is a hybrid fantasy/spy novel.

The spy stuff, which comprises most of the book by mass, is drawn from real history -- in particular, from the life of real Soviet spy Kim Philby -- and strives to be consistent with all particulars of that real history that are publicly known.

The book is a "secret history" as opposed to an "alternate history," intended to produce the impression: "for all we know, this really could have been what happened." It sticks to the historical record about the kind of matters that make it into said record, and only invents things in the blank spaces in between them.

As Powers put it:

I made it an ironclad rule that I could not change or disregard any of the recorded facts, nor rearrange any days of the calendar – and then I tried to figure out what momentous but unrecorded fact could explain them all.

You'll note that I'm being vague about what "the fantasy elements" are.

I'm doing that on purpose. Revealing much about their nature would be the kind of spoiler that actually spoils, because one of Declare's virtues -- and I really did admire this -- is the way it makes its fantastical secrets feel really secret. Like a secret doctrine, a mystery cult, an epistemic Rubicon that one does not cross lightly.

They are talked about elliptically, even among initiates (and Powers makes this feel naturalistic, not like cheap and pointless reader-teasing evasion). Before you know much else about these "fantasy elements," you know that encounters with them have a tendency to leave people scarred, broken, changed -- and disinclined to say much about what they saw.

The early chapters of the book almost feel like the opening of a "mundane" spy novel. Except they are dotted with stray glimpses, from odd angles, of... something else. Something that is clearly one single thing, with a coherent shape, only you cannot make out in full what that shape is. Something that feels, authentically, like it was not meant for your innocent eyes.

It's all very effective. Really great stuff.

But then, at least by the halfway mark if not earlier, the reader catches up with the characters. The shape of the thing comes into focus. You get what the deal is, insofar as anyone does, and insofar as there is a "deal" to get. The nature, if not the logic, of the hidden world is laid bare.

"The nature, if not the logic": this is the book's fundamental flaw. The fantasy elements of Declare eventually land in a worst-of-all-worlds no-man's-land between mystique and mechanism.

They are explained to the reader just enough that they lose their glamour; what initially feels like the mystic doctrine of a lost gospel, or the forbidden fruit of a Lovecraft story, ends up feeling more like a collection of "lore" passages accompanying tables of numbers in an RPG rulebook. Yet they are not explained enough that they make sense, the way a law-bound "magic system" makes sense; despite Powers' ambitions, they never quite become capable of explaining anything else.

To put the point a little differently, and set things up for my next one: Declare mixes together two ingredients which, on their own, are perfectly fine -- indeed, actively good -- but which absolutely cannot go together. Namely:

Mysterious, supernatural forces that feel properly mysterious, numinous, not quite bound by "our" human logic and thus fundamentally beyond our ken.

A secret-history version of bizarre and partially unknown real-world events, which supplies explanations for the weird parts and fills in the tantalizing gaps.

Why do historical mysteries draw our interest? It is not just that there is something we don't know. There are a lot of things we don't know, about history, and mostly they don't trouble us.

But there are some questions for which it does not seem possible to imagine an uninteresting answer.

When a real historical figure behaves in some bizarre manner -- as the real-world Kim Philby frequently did -- we know that, whatever cause moved them to do so, it must be outlandish in a way that matches its effect. When people act strangely, they do so for strange reasons. That is roughly what "acting strangely" means.

But! Once you allow "ineffable, partly unpredictable magic" to be a cause with effects, the link between interesting events and interesting causes is broken. You can now invent explanations which are less interesting than any real-world one could possibly be.

You can survey the historical record, note down all the intriguing gaps, and then sculpt an infinitely pliable magical putty into the precise shape of each gap, so as to fill it. These fillings do not have the shape of real things; they are made retrospectively, and modeled after the patterned obstructions marring our view, rather than the real patterns which are being obstructed. They do not have spiraling implications, as real things do; they plug the gaps they were made for, and do nothing else.

Human behavior has human causes, and human causes are frequently interesting, to us humans.

It is usually a virtue, in fictional depictions of magic, for that magic to feel nonhuman.

But it ceases to be a virtue when that magic goes on to become a substitute for the real human causes of real events. It provides answers to all our questions, at the cost of removing the reason we imagined we might want to possess those answers.

"Why on earth," you ask me, "did this bizarre historical event happen the way it did?"

And I respond: "a wizard did it."

You protest that this is not an explanation at all. You profess to be just as confused as you were at the outset.

You say, in exasperation: "it can't just be that. There has to be something more. Why did the wizard do it? Is it... the sort of thing that wizards do? Is there a 'sort of thing that wizards do'?"

In real life, you'd have a point. In real life, for every X, there is a sort of thing that Xs do.

But not for wizards. Remember #1 above? Wizards are beyond your ken. Perhaps there is "sort of thing they do," but if so, it is too subtle for your dull, unmagical brain.

Which is to say: they can do whatever the author, or the plot -- or the gaps in the historical record -- need them to do on any given occasion. And then they go back into their box again, until they need to be retrieved, in order to do something else entirely.

And worse: although the introduction of the wizard does not leave you any less puzzled, it frees you from caring that you are puzzled.

There is no longer the unscratched itch of an unsolved mystery about human behavior. You are not confused about a person, anymore, but about magic. And it is perfectly clear that you are never, ever going to understand magic. Your confusion is now expected, predictable. Everything is properly in order, as you can now see. You are free to go.

And yet somehow, you find, the book is not over. It will not be over for a while yet. You have other confusions, you see, which have not yet been stripped of their human interest and robbed of their allure.

(Not everything in Declare is like this, to be clear. I may be making too much of a few sore points in the plot, I guess. Still, there's no denying that I found the later parts of the book tedious, and this is at-least-sort-of why.)

[bowenoke]

I think there's a real moment every fan has to have where you're disappointed that a story didn't end in a compelling way and realize you had a higher opinion of the story than maybe it deserved. Loose threads, weird capitulation to a flawed or evil system, forgiveness and redemption for people who aren’t perceived as being remorseful enough. Even just disregard for relationships formed during the series. All things that make perfect sense in a movie or book written for a wide audience with financial obligations towards a non-offensive ending with a return to normalcy, but are off-putting if, to you, this tv show was actually secretly a scathing political commentary or a member of your real life found family. You believed at one point that the story was going to completely and fully Agree With You, but it fell short at the end.

I call this the Sherlock fallacy, and petition that anyone involved in any fandom be required, by law or extralegal threat, to watch Sherlock. and be inundated with period appropriate ship content. This will inoculate them for future fannish activity. Remember, anything can get as weird and freaky as it wants in the middle, but true subversion keeps the freaks alive until the credits roll

[zoe-oneesama]

So what are your thoughts (and salt) on your research re-watch on Queen Wasp?

This episode is annoying because it tries to play both sides - it is very much NOT a redemption arc episode but at the same time tries to make you feel sorry for Chloe after she fucks shit up, which has tricked some into believing this actually WAS part of Chloe's redemption arc.

As @hypexion laid out in a full essay, there never was a Chloe redemption arc because Chloe never thought she did anything wrong and never thought she had to change. In "Queen Wasp", she refuses to return the Miraculous on the grounds "finders keepers, losers weepers", deliberately causes a crisis in order to try and FAIL to save the day just to show off, and when confronted with her deeds only has this to say:

See, I didn't pull Scarlet Lady's complete disregard for human life out of my ass, it was canon all along! 😈

"Who cares"?! "Who CARES"?! Putting aside that "WE" did not save them, Ladybug and Chat Noir saved them from YOU, I'm pretty sure the people's who's LIVES you endangered "cares"!

Thing is, if you just watch this episode and put the entire idea of "redemption" or "hero Chloe" out of your mind, this is 3/4ths of a good episode. Pretty fun, actually, with Chloe just...being Chloe. And getting to hit Chloe in the face with a trash can ❤️.

So what's with all the audience emotional manipulation at the end?

Why is Chat Noir making soft face and using soft voice at Chloe at the end, commiserating that she STOLE a Miraculous (because once she decided not to return it when asked, yes, that's theft at that point), crashed a train, and ran away from the consequences just to ImPrEsS hEr MoThEr? Guess that makes it alright then, right Adrien? 🙃

(If it was just meant to be an Adrien Character Moment, they would've had Ladybug counter him by point out that her motivation doesn't make what she did okay, but instead they have Ladybug ALSO commiserate with Chloe)

As a character beat, I get that Adrien is channeling his daddy issues through Chloe's mommy issues, but I mean for the audience: why are they having Ladybug admit to "making mistakes" and Chat Noir comfort Chloe when SHE MESSED UP THIS BADLY except to manipulate the viewer into feeling sorry for her?! Her mother didn't ASK her to do any of those things, she did them all on her own, so why are the heroes giving her a pass, ie. why are the writers wanting the audience to give Chloe a pass???

No pass! She sucked! And she deserved her classmates ripping on her in "Malediktator", but then the story had the balls to try and make the audience feel bad for Chloe for that too!

Speaking of that, it's really weird that they ended "Queen Wasp" with Ladybug being so soft on Chloe at the end, only for Marinette to turn around at the beginning of "Malediktator" and go back to being really annoyed with her. Especially after she went out of her way to reconcile things between Chloe and Audrey.

Even the way they did it - equating Ladybug accidentally dropping the Miraculous in the middle of the battle and then relying on the Miraculous Cure to return the Miraculous to Fu, (something she'd have no reason to believe shouldn't happen), to Chloe deliberately causing a disaster in order to fail to impress her mom and refusing to return the Miraculous that she Was Not Given? Those are not the same! An honest error that Ladybug fully intended to rectify vs. Chloe disregarding other's safety and the right and wrong of keeping something that never belonged to her are not on equal footing.

Oh and then there's this gem:

Giving back an item that never belonged to you to the rightful owner isn't "exceptional", it's basic human decency. Good Lord Chloe is not "exceptional" for finally adhering to the code of conduct the rest of us learned in Kindergarden.

All this pushing the viewer to feel some type of way and it's all for nothing. Feeling sorry for Chloe just leads Ladybug to giving her another chance in "Malediktator", giving Chloe entitlement to the Bee Miraculous, facing the issues of the enemy knowing her identity in "Miraculer", having to flat out retract Chloe's access to the Bee Miraculous which Chloe responds to with a full on tantrum in "Miracle Queen", leading to Fu giving Guardianship over to Ladybug.

Woooow, real glad we were told over and over again by the narrative to go easy on Chloe, sHe JuSt NeEdS a GoOd InFluEnCe and a SeCoNd ChAnce. That sure ended well for everyone.

Also this is just me being a nitpicky asshole, but if Chloe didn't out herself right in front of everyone (ie. GABRIEL), the Hawkmoth era of the series would've been over. After Style Queen failed, Gabriel had completely given up since his "Masterpiece" failed. If Chloe hadn't revealed herself, Gabriel wouldn't have been inspired to akumatize a Miraculous Holder and might've gone into retirement long enough to return the Miraculous in secret or reveal Emilie to the public in search of other methods before he could've been "inspired" by something else.

The villain defeated by lack of motivation, lmao.

(Also also obviously this could've been doubly avoided by Ladybug not losing the Bee Miraculous or taking the Bee Miraculous out in the first place, but we could've had Anti-Hero Bee Chloe with an actual secret identity paired with a new antagonist to go into a new era of Miraculous, so I would've considered that a win)

MY main gripe with the three Chloe centric episodes "Style Queen", "Queen Wasp", and "Malediktator" is all the pointless, blatant audience manipulation. They went so far out their way to make the audience side with Chloe against Ladybug and feel bad for her only to turn around and call us stupid for doing so. I want my time back and I never even believed in the Redemption Arc. I can't imagine how much worse it was for someone who actually believed what they were selling.

And obviously it was terrible for the thing that brought Chloe and Audrey together is how they're horrible people who torment the working class, but maybe we should've taken that as a sign as to where this was going. Way to immediately resolve Chloe's mommy issues as soon as they were brought up.

Wait...is that why they made the problem in "Malediktator" Chloe's usefulness?

[dandelionjack]

THE LEGEND OF RUBY SUNDAY ANTI-REVIEW, AKA: I WANT TO SCREAM. CAN I SCREAM. CAN I SCREAM REAL LOUD

well that was … depressing. might go and rewatch something from s1 or s4 or s5 or s8 or s10 to remember what good doctor who feels like. or listen to some big finish.

really thought that the VHS tape would be the truman show reveal. oh well. we all thought something. silly me, expecting complex postmodernist media critique from a disneyfied children’s show. this is my cue to go back to watching things intended for adults, i guess.

i’ll delve into why sutekh is a shitty villain to revive for the new era in my next post — this one’s just for moping.

when you’re autistic, realising that your special interest media will probably never be good again is like growing apart from a childhood friend. it’s a slow, nagging sense of grief and loss, however absurd that may sound. this show saved my life in november after i’d just dropped out of uni. that’s what i’ll remember it as. not… this marvel-ised lacklustre forgettable slop.

and please, don’t you dare put false words in my mouth. you all know how big of a doctor who fan i am. despite what the bigots, racists and homophobes say, it’s not the doctor being Black or openly queer or a woman that killed earnest enjoyment of the show. the openly progressive politics are actually one of the few remaining positives about it. no — what killed it is what killed every long lasting franchise: the inevitable enshittification of all mainstream tv, brought about by unregulated capitalism, a complete disregard for artistic expression in anything but independent/diy media. anything that’s funded by corpos such as disney inevitably turns into figurative capeshit (even if it’s not literally about superheroes, you know the semantic field i’m discussing when i bring up that word). not even a formerly brilliant screenwriter like russell t davies can avoid falling into the trap of becoming complacent. “family-friendly” suddenly means “safe, dull, predictable”. as if children’s minds can’t be challenged or unsettled. as if weird and outlandish art isn’t what children remember for their entire lives, forgetting the other, trite, generic TV they were shown.

casual audiences remember Blink long after watching it as kids because it was wild and experimental on a shoestring budget. it was like nothing else on TV. same with The Empty Child/The Doctor Dances. the main issue with “series 1” (14) that i’m trying to express here is that, save two or three exceptions (73 Yards + to a lesser extent Boom and D&B), it is exactly like everything else on TV.

the only way out is to write our own worlds. fund them ourselves. cardboard, clingfilm and bubblewrap. that’s how doctor who used to be when it was funded by the BBC. that’s how it survived. whatever it’s trying to be now — well, that’s none of my business.

because business is all it’s become.

[kiisaes]

tell us about vld 👁️

(only if u want to)

i'll spare you a truly unhinged ranting for perhaps another time (even though this is gonna be long anyway) but tldr: vld is a show that could have been really good if it just stuck to its direction from the first two seasons!!! and also if its crew didn't accidentally breed the worst possible fandom ever!!!

it had a really good identity at the start— its characters were entertaining, its art and animation were charming if anything, the VAs were genuinely excellent picks and in terms of story it was simple (considering it's a kids show) but effective. the first two seasons focused on one-off, character-driven episodes that gave room for a lot of character writing, team bonding, and tone establishment. i believe that the reason why vld shipping was already so aggressive since s1 — without crew interference — was because the character writing was like, actually good. good enough where people could take their starting characterizations + team dynamic and run wild with it

vld was never going to be an enlightening, mature, groundbreaking show about anything super deep; it's a Y7 show about robot lions in space. but i'm sure most ppl going into vld didn't expect a piece of art, they just wanted to have fun with an atla-adjacent show, or they watched previous voltron iterations. and for what it was, it was very successful at the start! and one of the more popular netflix originals at its time!

but then vld tried taking itself more seriously in s3, and changed its primary storytelling method. now the episodes weren't usually problem-of-the-week, but each episode's plot had to feed into the next episode in line. which would've been fine, if the crew planned ahead and kept track of its characters and plot

but since the lion switch was also conveniently during this season (which inevitably implied switches in character arcs), keeping track of everything suddenly got way harder. also, the lion switch was ass. breaking my silence: that shit made no sense. why didn't they make allura the black paladin??? why do all those mental gymnastics with moving keith from red to black and lance from blue to red just to give allura blue, which was a lion that didn't even really fit her??? (i know the reason was cuz dotf did this lion placement, but is vld dotf? are the characters archetypes the same? no? i didn't think so!!!)

anyway because of the new serialized storytelling format, vld had to follow this really serious, high-stakes, even occasionally dark narrative to keep viewers engaged, and it just .. wasn't the same? like not only are characters' arcs dropping like flies, we're introducing new characters with barely any development or even personality, and it's not even that fun to watch anymore. what happened to my silly guys. what happened to goofin off in the castle. what happened to episode-long missions. this is not avatar. if i wanted to watch avatar i would just watch avatar.

and! in later seasons i think the crew caught on to how fans loveddd the episodic narratives in s1 and 2, so they tried bringing back one-off lighthearted episodes (dnd episode, game show episode, clear day episode, etc.) in an attempt to relive the old glory— and they were fun to watch on their own, sure, but were completely detached from the rest of the story atp. literally the only reason why i even remember these episodes is because they weren't a part of the narrative's incomprehensible sludge

don't even get me started on how the crew hated its audience. don't get me started on the ship bait, the weird canon queerbait situation(s), the irresponsible encouragement of parasocial fan relationships with VAs, artists, creators, you name it. it's how we got one of The worst fandoms in recent history. it's how vld was one of the newer fandoms that started an whole new era of fandom etiquette — namely, disregarding all previous fandom norms in favor of the most childish, pearl-clutching, moral-panicky discourse you'd find daily, and consequently you wouldn't EVER dare bring up to a normal person who exists in the real world.

the crew hated its audience so much, it essentially punished its fans by shutting down all fan theories, purposefully writing AROUND plot twists THEY SET UP, leaving a really messy and plot-hole-filled final script. they especially hated the shippers so much that they shut down BOTH main camps — klance and sheith — for canon allurance, a truly horrible way to end both their character arcs since neither character gets all that satisfying of a conclusion (lance becomes a farmer, allura fucking dies)

this is already long enough but i hope this gives you a general idea :') i have so many emotions about vld. someday i'll make the retrospective video essay of my dreams. this was my nonstop fixation for two straight years. i wasted two years on this shit.

also this show's 8 seasons were released all in a span of 2 and a half years.

[startrekfangirl2233-writes]

Spring, 2020 - San Diego, California

Chapter 7 Part 1 of You Are My Soulmate

Bradley ‘Rooster’ Bradshaw x Reader

Description: After your inquiry, you've been feeling oddly adrift. It feels weird, being back in your house, in your life like you belong in it. Things feel different. A chance encounter with your soulmate on the beach has you falling into something which seems incredibly close to love.

Disclaimers: Misogynistic speech. Mentioned Homosexual Relationships. Angst. Flagrant disregard for protocols or Authority. Angst. Anguish.

This content presented in this story is for audiences age 18 and over only. MINORS DNI. I will not be accepting tag-list requests from Blank or Ageless Blogs for this story.

Warnings: Female!Reader

Word Count: 3880

A/N: You all remember how I teased you with slow burn a year ago, right? We're finally starting to feel the burn now. I know it's taken me nearly a year to get here, but now is when we're going to have some sweet fluff for Tink and Rooster!

AO3: Cross-posted Here!

Wattpad: Cross-posted Here!

My Masterlist

Previous Part | Series Masterlist | Next Part

Tinkerbell

You’ve found yourself retreating to the ocean more often since the day of the inquiry. The crashing waves help you process everything that has happened over the past few months. You've been struck with so much pain, sorrow, and guilt; at times, it feels like you were barely living at all. You’re not sure if you actually lived through those horrible months or if a robot took control of your body. Some of the same feelings came back to you when you walked into your hangar on base the day after the trial.

The work is the same. Your team is the same. Yet, you can’t help feeling like everything has inexplicably changed. Your team has flourished under Commander Greyson's steady, quiet leadership. In your darkest moments, you wonder if they wouldn't be better off without you at the helm. You can't deny that Commander Greyson is brilliant at what he does. There would be so much your team can learn from him - so much you can learn from him. Even the drone project for Admiral Cain is completed with so much detail it makes your head spin. It feels odd, being back on the North Island Naval Base as notorious as you are. It leaves you with a prickling, itching sensation of being seen.

Jake and Javy had dogged you relentlessly that first day, spending all their time off hops draped over the worn sofa in the AMDO hangar in turn like a pair of eager, hungry, sweet Dobermans. They never hesitated to growl at the gossip floating around, even before your inquiry. But you chased them away after the first day, knowing you needed to stand by yourself. Being back home, in your actual house, helps too. The familiar sights and smells wrap you in a warm hug. So does being able to tinker with your cars and motorcycles.

But what you've missed the most when staying with Jake and Javy was having the sea nearby. The crashing of the waves, the salt in the air, the way the sand is rough under your feet. Every night, you had taken to languidly strolling at the tide line, relishing in the prickle of small seashells against the pads of your feet in the wet sand. The rush of water soothes the roar of your thoughts and grounds you. If only it could soothe your unconscious mind as well as the sea soothes your conscious thoughts. 

Of course, nothing can soothe your thoughts, not even the rush of the ocean in the distance as Bradley opens the passenger side door for you in front of a gorgeous off-white stucco house. The long, shaded drive is packed with cars, and you can feel your nerves with every footstep you take. You willingly take hold of a couple of the many tote bags full of alcohol Penny had given Bradley because you may not be sure what you’re doing here. You're still not sure why you accepted his invitation to celebrate his dad. Still, at least you can cart alcohol into the colossal house.

When the door opens, it's to a wall of pure sound. You're shell-shocked by it but more so by the slight man with dark hair and green eyes standing at the threshold.

“A-admiral Mitchell!” With your arms encumbered by the bags, you can’t salute, though a part of you wishes you could.

“At ease, Lieutenant Commander.” His grin is mischievous, and his voice is sardonic. “Come on in. I'm glad Bradley finally got off of his ass and invited you out to meet us.”

Your smile is nearly a grimace as you follow Admiral Mitchell into the kitchen and set the bags down on one of the counters. You turn and brush invisible dust off of your fingers. Admiral Mitchell's looking at you with a knowing smile on his face.

“I guess he didn't tell you he was bringing you here?”

You shake your head and let him take the bags out of your hands. “Well, you’re always welcome, kid. And please. Call me, Mav.”

The door swings open again, and this time, you’re hit with a waft of that sandalwood scent that you’re quickly coming to adore. It's Bradley, and you're not sure why, but he's easily holding all of the other bags, bulging with bottles of alcohol in his brawny arms.

“Hey, Baby Goose!” You grin at the naked affection in the other man’s words. “It took you long enough to get Tinkerbell to come here.”

“But, kiddo, you could’ve at least warned her what she was walking into!” 

Maverick Mitchell looks like he’s practically leaping for joy. You have to stifle your snicker as a blush crawls its way up Bradley’s neck.

“It was a spontaneous invitation, Dad.” Now, the endearment has you looking wide-eyed at Bradley.

“Go on, get all the drinks in the kitchen. Ice is out in the backyard, manning the grill. All of the others are out there, too. Grab whatever you’d like for yourselves, and get on out there!” Mav seems quite content to ignore the look on your face, skirting around you and Bradley in the hallway and disappearing through an arch at the end of the hallway when someone calls his name.

“Come on, Tink.” You follow his broad shoulders as he leads you through the house. The walls are covered with pictures, a lot of them depicting a tow-headed boy in various stages of growth. Of course, you realize they're Bradley when you see his graduation pictures right next to his Officer promotion pictures on the wall. When you walk through the same arch Mav disappeared through, you’re spellbound at the sight of the sun setting through the big picture windows. There are fairy lights strung through the trees and music playing. On an impromptu dance floor, you can see couples dancing.

There are a lot of people floating through the backyard. You recognize most of them from dossiers and others from reputations built on hearsay in the Navy, and all of a sudden, you're absolutely sure you shouldn't be here at all. The icing on the proverbial cake is when you see Mav kissing Iceman, yeah, that Iceman, tenderly on the lips.

“Yeah, Dad and Pops are soulmates.” You squeak just a little as those words hit.

“So you’re telling me your dad, Pete ‘Maverick’ Mitchell, and your Pops, Tom ‘Iceman’ Kazansky, the COMPACFLT of the US Navy, are soulmates?”

You’re sure you can be excused for your tone. This is a whopper of a secret to find out. Bradley takes one look at your face and snickers like he can’t believe the expression on his face. You poke your elbow into his side gently, trying to make him let up on his teasing. You’re not serious about it, enjoying the light air between the two of you. But when Bradley wraps his arm around your waist, you have to sigh at the warmth his arms bring you. He stops moving when he’s wrapped around you, one hand securely holding his beer, the other curled around your front like it was made to be there.

His sandalwood scent wraps you up as securely as his arms do. Standing here, seeing the sun setting behind the party happening out in the yard, it almost feels like you can do this - be soulmates with Bradley Bradshaw. Obviously, there is a lot you still need to talk to him about. But, the warmth Mav has shown you as some of Bradley’s only family goes a long way.

“It’s beautiful here,” you hum as you sip from your icy cold cider bottle, relishing in the condensation dripping onto your sun-warmed skin.

“Yeah, it is, isn’t it?” There’s something reverent in Bradley’s voice as he looks out over the yard with its sprawling green lawn.

“I’ve always wanted to have a life like Mav and Ice’s.” He smiles softly, his eyes sparkling in the golden light of the setting sun like amber shot through with motes of molten gold.

“My mom and dad have a house, you know?” You gasp and slide your fingers down until they’re laced with his across your stomach.

“It’s in Virginia. They got acres of land with the property. My mom’s parents gave it to my mom and dad when they got married. I can’t help but wonder if everything would have been different if I still had them both with me.”

“They loved you, Rooster. I don’t have to have met them to know that. They would have adored seeing the man you’ve become, Bradley.”

“I know they would have, Tinkerbell. I wish I could make that house a home, is all.”

“Who is to say you still can’t?”

“Who would want to build a life with me, anyhow?” There is sorrow in his voice, the same emotion streaking across his face in a flash.

“Well, I know I would be willing to try?” You’re not sure what prompts the words to spill out of your mouth. They feel so right on your tongue. The words also leave you feeling oddly vulnerable because they’re the vocalization of a dream you’ve been carrying yourself for a very long time. Bradley’s sweet intake of breath makes something light up in your chest.

“I’d like that,” he chuckles, “C’mon. Let me introduce you to everyone here. They’re the closest things to a family I’ve got. I want them to like you, but chances are, they’ll love you. They might not love me once they hear what happened, though.”

You slide your drink onto a table and slip your arms around his waist. His arms curl around you tenderly. His lips feather against the top of your head in a soft, barely there kiss.

“They’re your family, Roo. They’re going to love you no matter what.” 

He chuckles ruefully at your earnest words.

“They’re going to love you too, Tinkerbell.”

With those final words on the matter, you’re whisked out into the setting sun. A part of you can’t believe you’re out here rubbing elbows with US Navy elites. Every person Bradley introduces you to is another surprise. Before you can blink, you’ve chatted with Rear Admiral Kerner, who asks you to call him Slider, and laughed with Admiral Kazansky. You adore how this colossal cobbled-together family acts with each other. Every conversation is littered with inside jokes and teasing words. But more than how happy you are, it’s gratifying seeing how happy Bradley is. He seems to be in his element, laughing and reminiscing. There have been so many stories of Goose Bradshaw where you’ve seen him wiping away tears even while laughing that gloriously deep belly laugh.

People leave the party in pairs and trios, alcohol-soaked with colossal smiles curling their lips and laughter sneaking out as the ocean breeze brushes through the trees, salt-laden and wet as it smacks into your face. Before long, there are only a handful of the guests left in the garden. You’re not sure when he lit it, but Mav has started up a fire in the firepit, coals glowing red in the night air. You join the rest of the stragglers around the bonfire, settling in next to Bradley in one of the Adirondack chairs.

“So, Tinkerbell.” Your head snaps up so fast at the sound of her voice that it kind of hurts. It’s Sarah, The Iceman’s sister and Slider’s wife (how is this your life), who asks you, “How did you meet our Bradley?”

You swallow your sip of cider hurriedly - nearly choking on the fizzy liquid - caught on the spot as every face in the circle turns to you. Bradley grins as he lays an arm securely over your shoulders. That first night at The Hard Deck feels like it was a million years ago. A part of you can’t believe that it has only been a little over six months. It feels like you’re reliving that night over again when you recount it. You can taste the cocktails you’d been downing all night on your tongue. You half feel the sensations of Bradley’s hands on your skin as you recount the crush of people in the bar that night and the fear as you nearly get trampled. 

You unconsciously turn until you face Bradley, drinking in the sight of his face as he looks at you as you retell the first meeting of your fraught relationship. The electricity you’d felt that night is swarming through your veins again as you finish your retelling. You don’t mention a thing about the words you’d shared with him before leaving the Hard Deck and how you’d cried your eyes out in your bed at home, jet lag and exhaustion working in concert to make the words hit harder than they ever should have.

“That’s such a sweet story!” Sarah has a dreamy look on her face as she reaches for Slider’s hands with her own. They look so happy with each other, true soulmates if you’ve ever seen them. But you’re not one to ask. Since you were a little girl, you’ve had it drilled into your head to never ask someone what their soulmate marks are or even if their partner is their soulmate. It’s considered incredibly rude to do so when you’re not immediate family members or intimate friends. There are still people who do it, but they are rare and mostly do it to be rude. “I’m sure the two of you are going to be very happy together.”

You smile a little stiltedly, not sure how to answer that because while things are good between you and Bradley right now, far better than that first night anyhow, they’re far from where you could believe you’ve reached your happily ever after. Bradley seems just as discomfited as you are by his aunt’s well-meaning words. He joins the next conversation topic with aplomb, energy radiating out with him until it seems like everyone is wrapped up in the fun as the music plays low and quiet out of the speaker system. A few minutes later, he tugs you up out of your Adirondack and pulls you down towards the bottom of the garden.

“They love you, sweetheart.” You grin, wild and unabashed, as his words make you light up. Your heart is soaring, but your brain’s still unsure of this sudden need to have him at arm's reach, always touching you, always close. It feels too easy after all the pain you’ve been through.

“I’m glad, Bradley.”

“You don’t sound glad, Tink.” You’ve been trying to keep your emotions from your face, and now, more than ever, you’re sure you haven’t succeeded.  The bond between the two of you must be acting up as well because Bradley’s got this knowing look on his face. Goosebumps rise on your arms at the thought.

“I am.” He snorts and slides his Hawaiian shirt across your shoulders. It leaves him in just a white singlet. The top clings to his muscles and almost shines under the golden lights. Unbidden, the words spill out of you. 

“I promise I am, Bradley. It doesn’t feel like I deserve this, you know? Being this close to you? Seeing you happy.”

“So what do you want to do?” You fall in love the moment those words leave your soulmate’s mouth. There are no half-hidden attempts to over-explain what you’re feeling or urges to comfort you for something that isn’t a physical struggle. “How can I make it better?”

You shrug, burrowing into the thin fabric of the shirt as the cool ocean breeze wafts across the backyard.

“Would it be weird if we took things kind of slow for the next while?”

“How slow are you thinking?”

“Not too slow.” You’re quick to reassure your soulmate as you wrap an arm around his waist. Even now, there’s an ache burrowing under your skin at not feeling him pressed up against you. “I think we should date each other and get to actually know one another.”

When he doesn’t say anything for several long moments, you start to worry. It has you babbling, “We don’t have to do it if you don’t want to?”

His hands gently slide over your cheeks and tip your face up until you can see the soft look in Bradley’s whiskey eyes. 

“It sounds like a good idea.” He chuckles as his lips press against your forehead. “We’ve moved in extremes since we’ve met. We need to get to know each other, care about each other, more than just the feeling of this bond linking us together.”

You feel like you can barely breathe at the look in your soulmate's eyes as he leans in close enough that you can feel his mustache on your lips.

“What do you say about dinner? Tomorrow night?”

You hum in thought, aching to press your lips to his. His body is a line of heat pressed up against yours, and you want more.

“I’d love to.”

His exhale of joy brushes damply across your lips, and at that moment, you can’t resist pressing upwards. His lips are petal soft and gentle as they slide over yours. It’s a sensation in direct counterpoint to the rough bristles of his mustache. Your arms slide around his thick neck, fingers catching at the furrowed scars on the smooth skin. Bradley’s breath catches as you trace lightly across the slightly raised skin. If he’s this responsive to your touch, what would he do if you were tracing your lips and tongue down his throat?

When he pulls away, you whimper, actually honest-to-god whimper, at the feeling of his skin leaving yours.

“Slow, sweetheart.” He chuckles as he pulls away, a tender smile curving his lips. “We said we’d go slow, right?”

“Fine,” you huff, licking your lips in a futile urge to taste more of your soulmate on your skin. If it’s any consolation, Bradley seems to be just as affected by that slow, languid, blood-boilingly hot kiss as you are.

“Tell me more about your dads.” It’s a plea closer to a demand than it should be. But you have to control yourself. If you look at him any longer, you’ll jump him. You can’t do that to him, not when you’ve just decided to go slow.

“What about them?”

You grin. “How’d they meet?”

“At Top Gun.” He’s got a faraway look in his eyes. “When Goose and Mav came to North Island in ‘86, one of their first stops was the O-Club. It was one of the only places catering to mostly Navy personnel and was quite famous. That’s where they ran into Uncle Ron and Pops.”

“Did they like each other at first sight?”

“I don’t think so, sweets.” You chuckle and shiver as another breeze makes the lights sway over your heads.

“Were they better or worse than we were when we met?”

Bradley grins and opens his arms to you. You melt into his arms and sigh in pleasure at the warmth of him in your arms. His voice rumbles comfortingly in his chest as he continues, “I think they were worse, sweets. Much worse.” 

He sounds sardonic and sarcastic, something drier than the desert in his tone.

“So you’re telling me there is worse than calling me “a little thing who just got her position in the Navy on her knees”?” Your tone doesn’t hold any heat because you know while he said something first, you continued it. You’ve definitely given as good as he dished out.

“Shit.” 

You giggle at his hushed exhale because as angry and hurt as you were when you heard him say those words, you’ve forgiven him long ago.

“That was a bad night for me, Tink.” He pulls his hands away from you only to tangle them into his curls as anguish and shame twist his features. Half hidden against his chest, you tug him in closer, soothing his pain with your presence as much as you can.

“You have no idea what you looked like that night, did you? Fuck, you looked so beautiful, it took my breath away. I was hanging on to your every word. From the first thing you said to me, I was seconds away from ripping that little sundress off. All I wanted was to lay you out on my bed and never let you go.”

When you inhale, it feels like the ocean-laden breeze burns. If he felt like this on that first day, how come he didn’t act on his feelings? 

“Then that fight broke out. All I wanted to do then was protect you. So I grabbed your waist and got you to that bar stool, holding you there with my back to that room so nobody could hurt you. It would’ve been too soon to kiss you then, no matter how much I wanted to, with the heat of your skin imprinted on my fingertips. Too much, too soon. So, after the fight was broken up, I grabbed my drink and tried to look nonchalant. At least, I did until I heard Hangman calling for you. He sounded so worried like he cared so much for you. I assumed then and there, he was your soulmate. So I backed off.”

“I was in a completely shitty mood the rest of the night. I’d never been so close to someone who I thought could be mine. I wanted you, only you. But I managed to convince myself that you weren’t mine, that you would never be mine. I got drunk. So drunk I couldn’t put one foot in front of the other. I let my anger fester, and when it boiled to a fever pitch, I spat those words out when I saw you walk by, at a volume at which I knew you could hear.”

“I’m sorry, Tink.” Bradley’s voice is a growl, a pained one, as he apologizes to you again. “I’d understand if you couldn’t forgive me.”

There’s so much pain on his face you can’t help reaching up until you’re cupping his face in your hands.

“I forgave you a long time ago.”

It feels like an absolution saying those words into the night air. The disbelief on his face cements your decision even more. You forgive Bradley Bradshaw for all of his past sins, and you hope someday he can forgive all of yours, too. You press a kiss to his upturned jaw just because you can.

“There will never be anything but forgiveness between us, darling.”

“But how?” His voice is disbelieving. “How can we get past this?”

“The way we always have been meant to. Together.” Your eyes are soft as you tug on his hands until they wrap around you again. “And maybe, Roo, you should open that mouth and ask me if Jake Seresin is my soulmate next time.”

When he starts to snicker, you laugh, too. He pulls you in closer until he can press his lips to your forehead. You have many questions about your soulmate. For now, standing here at the bottom of the garden at his parent’s house is enough. You have the rest of your life in which to chat with Bradley. It’s a chance you’re not going to give up.

I DO NOT CONSENT TO HAVE MY WORK POSTED, TRANSLATED, OR PUBLISHED ON ANY SITES OTHER THAN ON TUMBLR, ON WATTPAD, OR ON AO3 BY ME. IF YOU SEE MY WORKS ANYWHERE OTHER THAN ON TUMBLR, ON WATTPAD, OR AO3, THEN THEY HAVE BEEN POSTED WITHOUT MY PERMISSION AND I WILL BE WORKING TO TAKE THEM DOWN.

Taglist:

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[doodlegirl1998]

What times is? It's time to my weird takes...and ok this one is about Mirio. I posted the idea in my server but here go: Mirio makes sense to be the AM's heir especially as am is not a good mentor.

Now hear me out: many people in this damn story, including nezu, seems to think and even suggested to am.

Mirio has:

1) has perfect control on his quirk

2) has a look that great resembles to am meaning he can be the next symbol as am wanted.

3) has experience

Now I'm a Izu's girl here, but while Izu saving a PoS is noble...it's really worthy to give his legendary and mega important quirk ?( I don't think ofa is powerful but I digress) this could impress Am but...he needed to do more digging before making such decision.

But he didn't.

Mirio is the best choice...but Nighteye acted like a lunatic and creep and AM back out had Nighteye act like a sane person...Mirio could have get the quirk (now would Mirio accept said quirk? I'm not sure)

So ....this all make think how...afo is right Izu has absolutely nothing! Am gave the quirk to Izu but it was too hushed, and full of stubbornness.

Hori shits on Izu in so many levels. His quirk is only given to him bc Nighteye is a creep...that's it. It's not bc Izu is amazing (he is but they had one interaction to make such decision, especially as he has a clock ticking. )

On that front am has no plan ...nothing. so Izu got the quirk bc am has no plan and stubbornness and nighteye is a creep.

Hi 👋 @mikeellee ,

All of this. Actually, if Nighteye was less of a narcissist and creep toward AM, we likely wouldn't have seen Izuku with OFA.

Mirio is the perfect choice on paper for an OFA successor, which is something Nedzu recognises. And creepy Nighteye sees him as similar to AM.

Disregarding the asspull that came later about it killing quirked users of OFA which no one knew of until later in the narrative.

AM was very impulsive in giving Izuku OFA to achieve his dreams of heroism in that moment. But we, as the audience, know that it was the right choice for Izuku to be his successor.

That doesn't change that logically, AM should have given Izuku a sponsorship to become a hero with technology (like AM did later with the Iron Might suit) and Mirio the OFA quirk.

[asteroidzzzn]

dance, baby! | part 2

pairing: dancer!reader x soccer!ellie

warnings: cursing, reader is still delulu and very anxious

word count: 1.9k

a/n: hi here is part 2 yayyyyy! im rlly excited i think this is cute :')

summary: ellie williams showed up to the nutcracker to watch you, which caused you to get distracted and fall. unfortunately for you, she's decided to make a habit of getting you flustered on stage.

༊*·˚

"would it be weird to invite her though?"

"dude, you know she's gonna go anyways. she's like, obsessed with you."

"ugh, i don't know..."

you sat on your bed with jade, who was annoyed with your overthinking, convinced that ellie liked you back, while you were debating whether or not to invite ellie to your upcoming dance show.

you had told jade about the small crush you formed shortly after you realized what you felt. it didn't take long for you to fall for her. she was so funny and kind, and your heartbeat never failed to quicken when she would ramble about something she was interested in with a massive grin.

since she went to see the nutcracker back in december, the two of you spent nearly every day together, especially during winter break. in february, you told her you were accepted to choreograph your very own piece for the upcoming spring showcase, which prompted her to hug you tightly, telling you how you would do amazing.

that was one of the many things you loved about her. she knew just what to say all time to ease your nerves before you ever told her you were nervous. she could see right through you.

one thing you wished she didn't see, though, were the fleeting glances and rosy cheeks from each time her hand grazed yours for a moment too long.

you fell back on your bed, face in your hands.

"i mean, i think my dance is good. it's just... she's gonna watch it knowing that i made it.

jade blinked. "what's so bad about that?"

you let out an exasperated sigh. "it's like asking someone to read your essay. actually, asking a whole class. it's so nerve racking. everyone in the room will have an opinion on something i choreographed."

"oh, how dare people perceive you."

you chuckled. "yeah, how dare they. you know what? i'll just do it."

you typed out a message to ellie inviting her to the spring showcase in a moment of short-lived boldness.

jade had to click send for you.

on the day of the show, you sat in the dressing room applying makeup for the first piece you danced in. you wore a beautiful pink flowing dress which looked like rose petals, and you put gold glitter on your eyelids.

the dance was about how love can come unexpectedly. your favorite part was when each dancer ran across the stage, searching for their parter. once the partners were all together, the music crescendoed, and you performed a beautiful partnering section. your instructor made it for her wife and named the piece love is love.

the dance you choreographed was also heavily focused on partnering. you were given five dancers to work with, so one was left without a partner. they reached into nothing, while the people with partners disregarded each other, taking what they had for granted.

it ended with the lone dancer falling to her knees, with a spotlight shining on her, and the partners walking away in the darkness.

jade was the only person you trusted to watch the dance before it went to the stage. she loved it, but, no matter how much praise she gave you, nausea still washed over you as you made your way backstage to talk to your dancers one final time before your piece became known to the world.

you gathered the five and huddled together in the wings.

"ok guys, you're gonna do great. i've loved working with you, and thank you for making my vision come to life," you giggled softly as the girls hugged you, whispering promises to perform their best for you.

you sat and watched the dance, occasionally peeking at the audience to see their reactions. it was difficult to read most people in the room, but you could obviously tell ellie loved it, from the way she was attentively watching. she knew it was yours, because there was large text projected on the screen behind the stage stating your name and the title of your dance before the lights faded in.

you found yourself smiling wider than you would like to admit at the fact she was sitting in the front row, again.

once the dance concluded, the audience gave a large applause. everything went perfectly. you couldn't stop showering your dancers with praise for their performance.

shortly after, it was time for love is love. you met up with your partner you entered stage with backstage. you took multiple deep breaths with your eyes closed, clearing your mind.

your partner squeezed your hand. she could sense your anxiety from the way your hand trembled in hers. you were worried you would fall from the lift the two of you always struggled with.

you weren't sure you'd survive the embarrassment of falling in front of ellie (and a massive crowd, but they didn't matter as much) again.

"we got this," your partner whispered, and you flashed her a quick apprehensive smile. you entered stage during the blackout and sat down as the audience cheered in anticipation.

against your better judgement, once your head rose, your eyes found ellie's. next time you would have to tell her to sit in the back of the house. wear glasses, perhaps. she was too pretty for her own good.

you quickly turned away, and your partner guided you up. she gripped your arm and waist, pulling you onto her shoulder. you held your breath. wobbled slightly.

but you stayed.

you swiftly rolled off of her back and landed, taking her hand and running off for the next partner to enter. there was slight applause for the stunt, and quite a loud wooo! stood out from the front row.

you reentered the stage to complete the exhausting group section, eventually falling to the floor in a clump with the others, breathing heavily, holding each other close.

your gaze shifted to the audience a final time before exiting. ellie and the two people on either side of her had slipped away. you chose to push that to the back of your mind for now. you walked out during the blackout, panting as you made your way to the dressing room to grab water.

jade's yellow dress flowed as she ran up behind you, gripping your shoulders and almost tipping you over. you let out a slight squeal as she laughed, wrapping her arms around your neck.

"that was the best run we've ever done, oh my god! and your lift with marcie was so good!"

you giggled, "i know right! now get off of me, you're so sticky and sweaty, and i really need to get some water."

jade gripped your arm so you couldn't escape her hold. "actually, let's go outside to get some fresh air real quick."

"can i at least get my water first?"

"uh, no this is really important," she ushered you to the back door to enter the parking lot.

your eyebrows furrowed with confusion. "we could've gone out the side door, why are we all the way back..." your words fell short at the sight in front of you.

you recognized dina and jesse as ellie's friends, who stood giggling behind a very red ellie williams, holding out pink flowers to you. matching your costume, again. it was sickeningly sweet.

you approached her as she began speaking with a very noticeable quiver in her words.

"uh, ignore them," she gestured to dina and jesse, "i couldn't bribe them out of not being here."

you chuckled nervously, glancing back at jade. she threw up a thumbs-up with a giddy smile.

ellie cleared her throat before speaking again. "i was wondering if you... wanted to... go out with me? sometime? y'know, like a date...? we, uh, thought it would be kinda fitting to ask after a dance called love is love, cause, yeah. by the way, you were beautiful, it was so-"

you cut her adorable rambling short by wrapping your arms around her, whispering, "yesyesyes," into her neck.

she hugged you in return, nearly lifting you off the ground with how tight she was pulling you in. when you separated, the both of you wore beaming expressions.

jade suddenly punched your shoulder. "i literally told you she liked you back!"

dina folded her arms behind ellie, lifting a smug eyebrow. "yeah, so did i."

you and ellie flushed at the revelation you had been hopelessly pining over each other. despite that, words couldn't describe how ecstatic you felt that ellie reciprocated your feelings. you were over the moon.

she handed you the bouquet. "i should go, i don't wanna miss more of the show."

"yeah, i'll see you later," you pressed a quick kiss to her cheek, leaving her with a small mark from your red lipstick. once you reached the dressing room inside you immediately grabbed jade, pulling her into a hug and jumping up and down.

"oh my god oh my godohmygod!"

jade indulged your giddiness, jumping along with you as you squeeled. little did you know, ellie was doing the same exact thing, just outside the door.

༊*·˚

near the beginning of may, ellie had a huge game coming up. and what good of a girlfriend would you be if you didn't try your absolute hardest to embarrass her?

ellie situated herself into her position on the field, where she was a midfielder, whatever that was.

was this how clueless she felt while watching you dance? she joked around about how she could never understand the silly dance terminology, and she insisted you were submitting yourself to torture when you told her you're actually standing on your toes in pointe shoes.

you watched the girls run around the field, cheering when the crowd did, even though you had no idea what had just happened.

after a few minutes, your team got a goal.

"hell yeah! let's go!" you whooped among the crowd, catching the attention of ellie. you waved at her, smiling. she seemed surprised you were there, attempting to mouth something at you, but she was rudely interrupted by a girl from the opposite team shoving her out of the way.

you snorted at the way she stumbled, catching your eyes one more time before running after the girl.

you hadn't told you you'd be showing up since you had a dress rehearsal for the upcoming competition, but you wouldn't miss any of her games for the world.

she caught up to the girl, swerving expertly around her and directing the ball to the opposite side, taking a risk and kicking it as hard as she could, and she scored.

"that's my girl!" you shouted loudly, clapping for her as her teammates ran up to her, high-fiving and celebrating.

despite all the attention she was getting from her team, her eyes were glued to you, her biggest cheerleader.

nothing in the world could compare to the way she looked at you once she found you in the bleachers after the game.

"hi," you giggled into her hair as she rushed up and pulled you into a hug, spinning you around. "you were amazing!"

"you're amazing," she muttered before kissing you. after a few moments she pulled away, still out of breath from the game. "i thought you had a dress rehearsal to be at right now?"

you pushed a piece of her hair that had stuck to her forehead away from her eyes. "well yeah, but you're more important than a dress rehearsal, i already know my dances like the back of my hand. and i told mrs. morgan i was gonna show up late anyways," you glanced over her shoulder to see her team beckoning her to come over.

you pressed your hands on her chest, pushing away slightly. "your team wants you over there, and i should head out now."

"ok," she pecked your lips and began backing away. "have fun at dance, baby! love you!" she called from over her shoulder.

"i love you, too els," you grinned brightly.

you were the luckiest girl in the world.

༊*·˚

a/n: yayy im so happy with how this turned out!! (*^▽^*) btw i know nothing about soccer besides the things i've seen my little sister do when she plays so,,,,,, apologizes if i said something dumb ikik. again feedback is rlly appreciated bc im kinda sorta new to writing, anything helps! tysm for reading!! hope u enjoyed this :)

tags: @ximtiredx

[lightgriffinsect]

OH MY GOD FINALLY SOMEONE ELSE WHO HATES COUGAR’S CONTENT

before he started making those weird shipping videos I actually liked his fnf comic dub but then he started making content farm shipping videos at first I didn’t mind until the thumbnails for the videos started becoming really suggestive

and yes I know fnf is not a kid friendly game but it got really annoying and gross that every tabi video is just him being harassed by that tall girl (I forgot her name) and most of the videos were giving toxic couples vibes like seriously why is tabi always getting paired with a bunch of female characters like what is this a love triangle anime????😭😭😭

it doesn’t help the fact that cougar's voice B3 boyfriend from the B3 remixed mod so with this shit going on it can cause the dev team to kick him off (I hope they does because honestly his voice doesn’t fit B3 boyfriend) and find a new va 

and now he’s making farm content videos of the smiling critters from poppy playtime by making them hot furry characters LIKE DUDE THOSE ARE CHILDREN TOYS WHY ARE YOU SEXUALIZING!???!?!?!?!?!

So yeah I hope someone can tabi away from this man

the tall girl you're referring to is Nikusa, the kinda-sorta villain(?) of FNF Entity. she's an awesome character who also doesn't deserve the crap Cougar put her through.

speaking of which, EXACTLY???? I never liked cougar's dubs at all tbh; even comics that I personally had read beforehand, which had no hints of romance or shipping whatsoever, became so uncomfortably sexual and harem-y the moment Cougar got permission to dub them. i imagine there were artists who didn't want their work cast in this light at all, and I just feel horrible for them. it's really gross.

and honestly??? FNF being a mature game has NOTHING to do with the overly sexual thumbnails and blatant disrespect of Homskiy's and other creators' wishes for their characters. that doesn't make it okay at all. it doesn't matter how family friendly an IP is, if it's popular, people who only value views WILL come up with the most disgusting clickbait garbage as long as it gets them attention. content farms will oversexualize the most innocent of child-friendly characters in order to get views. FNF being for older audiences doesn't make it better.

cougar's channel has become nothing more than one of these farms. he just happens to be using a former friend's beloved character as a mascot, which only makes it worse.

it reminds me of the downfall of Gametoons and EnchantedMob, ngl. they used to make awesome videos with genuine effort and well-thought out plotlines. now their content is in a similar state. it's disgusting. the fact that cougar has let his standards devolve to this is abhorrent.

every artist has boundaries when it comes to fanart of their work. for such a renowned person in the FNF fandom, with such a large platform, to NOT make sure he isn't crossing those boundaries, and in fact actively disrespect them, sets a terrible precedent for future "big" mod devs to follow.

cougar absolutely cannot get away with this. too many other people in this fandom have, but this is something everyone has borne witness to. it is 2024, and we're sick of seeing this. we want every scrap of what we have left.

i honestly hope the remaining mod devs are doing alright. i haven't talked about them much but their experience working on Vs. Ex is no less valid. it's sickening that cougar took advantage of minors to finish all the work on their own so he could slack off. again, an ADULT could not be bothered to handle anything of the mod development, so he left it all to the rest of the team that he was leading, most of whom were MINORS.

cougar must be held accountable for his blatant disregard for Homskiy's boundaries, breaking his trust and using his beloved character against him. no one should forget how he exploited his underage co-devs to dump all the stress of finishing the mod on them.

Tabi's character is beloved to not only Homskiy and the other devs who actually worked on the mod, not only the Entity creators, but to all of us. everyone in the FNF fandom who has gone out of their way to make art for Tabi, everyone who has cared enough to even praise this art, to seek it out, we know this character's worth. we are the ones who value him.

the same goes for Nikusa, and Ayana, and every other character that he's reduced to shipping fodder and suggestive thumbnail art. I just hope outsiders and people who only know them through cougar's "dubs" will understand the same.

[captorations]

i need more tlt fans to read worm and ward. because there are some insanely gnawable situationships here and most of the fandom flat out ignores them. the protagonist of ward was confessed to by the symbiotic alien living in her brain that gives her superpowers but can't actually talk to her in any normal way. and the confession was reciprocated. this is fucking canon. and there are exactly three (3) fics tagged with them on ao3.

like the weird smut options you get between a girl and her sapient shapeshifting forcefield aside, the dynamic is fucking excellent. her alien passenger literally represents and reflects her trauma but also protects her from it. the alien used to be part of a hivemind doing Experimence on humans but the alien gods controlling the hivemind got murdered to death so now it's just doing its own thing and looking after its human. and the human has (completely understandable) massive trust issues and can't fully accept anyone's emotional investment in her... except maybe the alien consciousness who's been part of her brain for a decade.

like. there are fics written between the release of gtn and htn exploring the fucked up situation that would be loving someone that is inextricably part of you and utterly devoted to your safety. and who you can't properly communicate with. and these were part speculation and part blatant disregard of canon. and then ward is just doing that In The Text and almost none of its audience cares