#and the week after that but idk if my seasonal contract is going 2 want 2 keep me or not so. shrug!!!!

[anachronistic-falsehood]

oiugh. jesus. lookin at my work schedule for december i am going 2 have a VERY BUSY MONTH

[footiehoemcfc]

We'll be Alright

Hi :) okay so this is the first fic I've ever written and the first one I've ever posted so I'm still new to trying and figuring out how this works. I've always wanted to write one and I had this concept on my notes for a while now. I also want to thank @carlottawllms and @cityfanchelseaslut because with just their writing they played a small part in inspiring me to do this <3. Anyways this will deff have a second part or three idk yet, but it will not be out until like a week or two cause I'm going a on a trip. I hope you like it and if you have feedback lmk ily. Angst, tw some curse words, 2.7k words PART 2, 3 and 4 (final) on my masterlist!

Life lately had been stressful to say the least. It had taken a toll on you and Mason. You were in the middle of a busy period with your company, a lot of meetings, projects and deadlines. On top of that, you’ve had family problems. Mason was dealing with social media scrutiny, transfer rumors, little to zero game time and it affected him, more than he liked to admit. You both were really just tired of everything and the only thing both of you wanted was a break from everything and be with one another. 

Your relationship was not new, but it was not long enough for it to have been through really rough patches. You knew at some point it would come though, Mason travels a lot and is always training. However, you always thought that whatever rough patch you’d go through would be easy with him since you two were pretty good at communicating. This hasn’t been the case at all. Ever since the new year Mason has been more and more distant and wanted to talk less about everything. You could feel it, you felt lonely. You felt like you were just there, you did not feel like his girlfriend, you felt like he didn’t love you as much. 

It was already dinner time and you were cooking for the both of you, something you always liked to do. You heard the front door open and Mason walk in through the door. You smiled at him and he gave you a smile as well. “Hi my love, smells good” he said as he placed his keys on the key holder. “Hi baby, thanks I’m making this Mexican bowl I saw on tiktok thought you might like it”, he came over to you and gave you a kiss on the cheek saying “Thank you”. 

When you finished cooking, you both sat down and ate almost entirely in silence until he decided to tell you something you were not expecting. “I had a meeting with Lew and my dad today, about my contract”, you had no idea where this was going since it was pretty much the first time he was talking about this topic with you. You nodded for him to go on, “well I think a transfer would be the best option for me in the summer, there are a couple of clubs that have shown interest so…yea”. What? You thought to yourself. You were so confused. He had always wanted to stay here why is it changing all of a sudden? You met this boy 2 years ago, he would always go on and on about how much he loved the fans, the team, the staff, the stadium, the atmosphere, so how come he wants to leave now? At the beginning of the relationship you would’ve agreed immediately not being a huge Chelsea fan yourself, but after being with him and getting to know him, you could care less what club he was playing, you knew how much he loved living here and being on the team. Sure, this season has been far from what they thought it would be, but you were not expecting this. You had your doubts, why is he wanting a move now? 

“Hello, are you there?” Mason said chuckling interrupting you from all of your thoughts. “I thought you’d be more excited or happy about this…” he said, “No, I mean, yes, I’m just shocked sorry. I wasn’t expecting that, especially since you love it here and since I’ve known you you’ve never mentioned leaving or anything like that.” “Yea I know I never have but, you know my contract ends next year, the new offer is not ideal, and Lewis and my dad think it’s the best option” he said looking at you, “okay” you weren’t sure what to say. You knew it was not his idea. As much as he needed to take into consideration other people’s opinions on this matter, you thought it was best if he made a decision based on what he thought it was best for him. “Okayy what?” “Nothing” “Y/n I know you, you are biting your tongue”. 

Well, if you promised to be honest with him you would. “I just think…I mean is that what you really want? You want to leave? Or is it just the easy way out? Or just because your family said it was best you think it is?” you said this in a loving tone, trying to really figure out why he was trying to decide so quickly on this. “I-I do want this” he stuttered, you knew deep down he was still debating whether it would be a good idea or not. “Okay, then that’s fine” you said getting up and picking up your plate. He placed his fork down and looked frustrated. “You don’t believe me” “Mason plea-“ “This is going to be the best for me, I know you never really cared or supported chels but it will be the same with the new club so not much will change and it won’t be that hard for you” you stopped what you were doing while he said this. You never cared? You knew this would turn ugly now that both of you were getting more upset. “I never cared?! I always go to your games when I can, or I watch them from home. You know damn well wherever you go I will support you because you are my boyfriend” “Then why is this so bad for you?” “Because I know this is not what you want!” as much as you didn’t want to raise your voice, you were getting tired of trying to make him understand what bothered you.

You wanted him to be happy, and if that meant leaving then so be it, but it just confused you how he would make such a big decision in a span of a few hours without thinking about it more. Hell, he could barely decide what to wear for a night out in two hours. “It’s what I want now!” He had never raised his voice like this with you. You could cut the tension with a knife in the room. “Have you not seen the shit show this season has been!? Of course not, you’ve been busier than ever with your job and your office meetings.” “And don’t you think that maybe next year it will be different? You are bullshitting yourself into thinking that going to another place is the better option when you and I both know you’ve never ever dreamed of that. Just because people that love you want that for you does not mean you need to do it. Think for yourself. And I do care, I watch every single game of yours, I never say anything about it cause I know you come home upset and never talk to me about it…and that’s…that’s a whole other thing” whispering the last part and looking away. 

This was it. This was the rough patch you were anticipating with him. You didn’t want to have this fight but maybe it was for the best. You were not planning on telling Mason how you’ve felt the last couple of months to not add anything more on his plate, but tonight maybe would be the day. You were tired of it, the first time you are hearing about his contract is today, never discussing it with you. You knew it would be an option and you would follow him anywhere, but it hurt that he could never talk to you about it and have your input as well, every big decision you’ve made you would always ask his opinion. “What whole other thing?” “Mason…I feel like…I feel like the past 2-3 months I’ve just been trying for you to talk to me and for you to let me help you and you just don’t want it. I didn’t even know when you were injured, I find out today that you made up your mind about what you want to do, I never knew anything about this whole thing. I’m out of the loop on your life. I feel like I’m there for you or at least try to cause you don’t’ let me, and you never bother to be there for me, I’ve been going through a lot too at work and with my family.” After saying that you had no idea how this would go down. To be honest, recently you could never tell in which mood Mason would be. You did not blame him though, it has been incredibly hard for him, but you needed him as well.

After you said this his face, just said it all. “Y/n this whole year has been shit, I don’t need this” Ouch. You excepted different outcomes from this, but him not caring AGAIN was not one of them. “You don’t need what? Me? This relationship? To talk about it?” You were getting more and more upset, you felt like he was invalidating your feelings. “No, I don’t need more problems, I already have enough bullshit to deal with. I don’t talk to you about it because I know it will stress you out, more than you are already.” You scoffed hearing this. “Again, you don’t believe me fucking hell” “No I don’t Mason, how come you can open up and talk to your friends and not me?” Mason started grabbing his face and pacing around the room. He didn’t want to have this conversation, you could visibly tell. But you were adamant to figure out why he was being like this with you. “You are so selfish sometimes.” 

After everything you have done, for him to call you selfish was the tip of the iceberg. “Selfish!? Selfish? Are you being serious right now? Selfish because I want to feel like your fucking girlfriend again?!” “You are!” This was getting heated very quickly and you didn’t like it. What was supposed to be a nice dinner with him just turned into probably the biggest argument you two have ever had. “Mason” you tried calming yourself down to talk to him so he would do the same as well. “Listen, I feel the way I fee-“ “Do you like seeing me fail here to feel better about yourself? Is that what this is?” “What?” You were shocked. How did it go from you being selfish to know you wanting him to fail. It’s like both of you were throwing in everything, every single thought you two have had the past month because you haven’t been communicating. Being selfish was one thing, but him thinking that low of you hurt, specially because you have always rooted for him. “Where the hell did that come from?” You need to know if you did something to make him think that way, you were certain you hadn’t. “It doesn’t matter” he was about to walk to the main entrance of the house to go upstairs. “No, what is that about?” He stopped. He didn’t turn around, debating whether to keep arguing or just leave it and go upstairs. He finally turned around, “Jayden had that thought and…I don’t know I feel like now that you think I’m making the wrong decision maybe he is right” Jayden. The one friend of his that had some sort of vendetta against you. You were always nice to him, but he was a prick. You had your reasons to dislike him and Mason knew you two did not get along but you were not going to be that girlfriend that wants their boyfriend to cut someone off their lives. You were aware he didn’t like you too, why? He had always said Mason “settled” too quickly and he was too young to be “fucking around with just one girl”. Jayden loved going out, getting drunk and have a crazy night. Mason did not, but Jayden always thought it was you telling him not to go out drinking or something. 

You snapped back to reality. “Jayden? Out of all of your friends, you are going to believe Jayden? The guy who hates me for god knows what?” Mason was just blank, he was slowly realizing how ridiculous that sounded, especially since it was coming from someone who doesn’t really know you. But that, that was your tipping point. You felt like you had enough. First, being called selfish and now this. You wanted to cry, not because of the situation itself but because it hurt that after all the effort you’ve made to be there for him even thought you were having a hard time to, he would think like that. You gathered up the courage to say what you had to say, “well you know what, if you want to be talking to your friends about all of this and not me, go ahead. I’m done, and you can tell Jayden to go fuck himself, and so can you.” You walked up to the couch to grab your overnight bag, put your shoes and jacket on and leave. You did not want to be with him now. You felt like he was disrespecting you. He tried to stop you from leaving the kitchen. You realized that was not all you had inside you. 

“Y/n stop please, we can talk about this” just as you were about to open the front door, you decided to let it out. “Oh, now you want to talk. You want to believe what your friends say? Go ahead. I’ve been so patient Mason I really have. I’ve come here after every game to try and take your mind off it and the only way it worked was when it was sex, I’ve been trying for you to talk to me but no you have your stupid fucking friend, I’ve been trying to get you help and no you don’t need it and I’m worrying too much. I’ve been waiting for YOU to ask me how I am and actually care about my life as well but you haven’t cause you don’t. I’ve been feeling like a fucking ghost in your house and with you, all while I’ve felt like shit cause my job is killing me, I feel like I will literally break down any day now and I STILL make the fucking effort to come here because I know you are not okay after not winning another fucking game. So I am not selfish, I’m not against the idea of you leaving just because of me, I don’t like seeing you fail just to feel better about myself, I am just fucking tired of this and tired of feeling like shit and trying to figure out what the fuck I did wrong and if you still even love me because every time you’ve said it the last months it just sounds like you’re saying it out of habit. So, you figure out what you want, think whatever you want to think about me based on what your stupid friends say more specifically the same one that does not like me. I’m leaving.” It was like the weight of the world came off your shoulders. 

You never ever raise your voice or snap like this. But having felt so sad, unappreciated and just not loved made you say all of this. Mason just stood there listening to you. You tried getting all of it out without tearing up, but you couldn’t. You opened the door and left. Mason was hurt, he hated that you have felt that way for so long. He didn’t mean for it to become this huge. He knows he was wrong in assuming that of you, he knows he was wrong in believing something Jayden had said. He had no idea how was going to fix it, but he was determined to do it.

[azuresparkz]

☆guess who's back!☆

IDK if I still have any mutuals on here after how long I've been away, but I'm back and excited to start posting again! I have a lot of fun written, musical and artistic content that I'm excited to share on here again. I've missed the text-based blog format and I'm ready to return! Without further ado, here are some of the projects I'll be working on this year.

My original musical "On Replay" is getting professional workshops done with the full length draft of the script and song demos THIS MAY! I have 3 weeks to finish my script and another 2 on top of that for my demos to be ready for audition weekend in march. I'm incredibly excited as this is my biggest and most long term passion project from when I did my first short-form workshops in August last year. I cannot wait to see where this goes.

I'm playing Dogberry in TAPAC's season of Much Ado About Nothing! The performance will be the weekend before I've set auditions for On Replay to be which will be tight but means I've finished the show before sorting auditions for another.

I'm going to start being active on my Youtube Channel "MeKaiElla" again! I'm going to be posting regular covers as of this weekend every 2 weeks, hopefully working on some more general youtube content as well if I can get a good video camera

I'll be posting regular content reviews of shows, movies, music and other art that I get to enjoy on here, hopefully at least weekly or two times a week

I'll be tabling at a LOT of conventions and markets this year, as many as I can get my hands on reserving to up my con-game and selling game this year. I haven't secured a table for Overload as of yet but I will be putting aside cash for when I get the email that a table is ready for me and whoever I plan to split it with!

Speaking of my art, I'm going to be investing a lot more time in making art more regularly, I've missed it and have been finding my joy in it again recently without pressure, but I want to improve my skills and build my graphic design and illustration brand if I can so I'll be posting more regularly, making and hopefully reaching feasible growth goals and hopefully be able to cultivate a supportive and large enough audience that I can open my very own Patreon.

My partner and best friend are working on a podcast! It'll either be called the "Three Braincell Podcast" or "The Chodecast" depending on what we decide, once my friend moves into her new place we're gonna get started on planning our format and getting some test streams and episodes out there.

I plan to work on more cosplay content as I am now an exec member of my university's cosplay association, I will be bringing monthly content both on here and at @azuresparkz.cos on instagram. I MAY be returning to tiktok creation at some point, but I'm still on the fence. It's been 3 years since I made Beetlejuice content on there and I havent redownloaded tiktok since may of last year, so we'll just have to see what happens.

I'm actively studying theatre and acting at university, so i want to put some of my time into writing skits and working more on my scripts and putting them to the performance test on both larger and smaller scales such as on youtube, reels and tiktok. I also

I've been applying for a TONNE of jobs, currently employed as a freelance graphic designer currently hired on a monthly basis by a Training Company and also working at a vineyard close to my parent's house. I've got 3 more jobs in the works, a cafe near my flat that's wanting me for casual work, a Theatre in the city looking for FOH and the University Magazine! I'm looking at the Cafe's contract today and am waiting on interview dates for both the magazine and the theatre this week, but all opportunities are very exciting! Hopefully I'll be able to organise myself and these jobs so I can prevent myself from overstretching with my studies, work and projects and not burn out like last year

My band "Kaloula" is going to be doing tonnes of gigs this year so I'll be posting bits and pieces about our gigs, recordings we do, and such and the like so if you're in the Auckland NZ area you should come check us out at the Portland Public House every other week @ 10pm! (once we get our dates for this year teehee)

I plan to also develop and produce a solo EP this year, ready for full release by the end of this year, with solos dropping throughout the year. I'll be talking more about this after my focus on my musical and it's concept album are complete.

So! A lot of plans, a lot to work on and a lot of opportunities and projects to be excited about. I can't wait to share all of this on here and connect more with an audience for all my exciting projects!

Much love, Em☆

[tanoraqui]

okay I have to do this today because even I wouldn’t do it after the godforsaken finale airs, and it’s basically my specialty and I did spend like an hour thinking about it last night while washing dishes. Definitely partly inspired by @words-writ-in-starlight​‘s insightful post on everything Supernatural did wrong, and apologies in advance to all the characters for dragging them into anything related to Christian mythology:

Wei Wuxian’s parents die in a house fire when he’s 6(? I refuse to look anything up) months old

Jiangs are a hunter family I guess? That whole disaster of a family dynamic, except WWX dips out at some point to be idk an environmental activist bc at the time, that seems like the larger threat to the whole world. “Mom and Dad went on a hunting trip and they haven’t come back”, “bitch” “jerk”, 2 brothers in a beat-up old car, you know the drill

Jins are also an old hunting family, but more Men of Letters energy - they have a fancy bunker and do research and avoid getting their actual hands dirty. Jiang Yanli ducked out of the active hunting life a few years ago to be happily married to her peacock and settled down with a baby and she’s fine. We’re not going to bother Yanli. She’s safe and happy and doesn’t need to involved in any of this

so, WWX is the demon blood child developing exciting new abilities like telekinesis, mind control, exorcising demons by sheer force of will...etc, and Jiang Cheng is the Righteous Man. Lucifer, Michael, etc.

s1-3 probably proceeds more or less as spn canon...which I more or less remember...by the time they find their parents at the end of s1, Jiang Fengmian is...ugh, we probably shouldn’t kill him offscreen, I mean, we should probably meet him before he dies. I guess. Madam Yu lasts longer because I’m way more interested in her. But we do know that both Jiang parents are totally inclined to fling the boys into a metaphorical or literal escape boat and go hold the line for as long as possible, so...that’s spn energy...

Xue Yang is the one who’s like “fuck yeah, demon powers” and opens the gates of Hell, because I want him to have nice* things

*nice for Xue Yang

from characterization rather than memory, I’m 90% sure that Dean tried to hide his crossroads deal from Sam, but Jiang Cheng does it...better. I think it does come out, though. Right before the hellhounds do.

here’s where it starts to go farther off from spn canon. Jiang Cheng crawls his way out of the grave, gets stalked by a menacing presence that explodes windows for an episode, incidentally can’t find WWX...*Lan Wangji voice* “I’m the one who gripped you tight and raised you from Perdition” (a baller line then and a baller line now)...and then the next episode starts with them all awkwardly standing around, and JC is like, “ok well let’s go find my brother then”, and you think there’s going to be an mdzs-riffing JC+LWJ Roadtrip To Find WWX...and they’re immediately attacked by like a dozen demons

in fact, the first time we see WWX in s4 is here, wherein he goes toe to toe with an angel and...holds his own. that’s new and terrifying! also is leading a squad of demons??

because here’s the thing: for the last 3(?) months, there’s been war in hell

because unlike Some People Mooses, upon finding out that his brother’s soul was legally nearly-owned by a crossroads demon, heir-apparent-to-Satan!WWX went, “actually fuck that” and kicked open the door of Hell (metaphorically, not loosing any demons this time) and was like, “who do I have to beat the shit out of to get a specific crossroads contract around here”

this did not work, obv. He didn’t know until it was too late, Lilith had already snapped up the contract, etc. etc.

obviously he also tried to offer himself instead, and got rejected for some reason

Since Jiang Cheng died, however, there’s been a war for control of Hell. Leading one side, Lilith, the Original Babe, who wants to break all 666(?) seals keeping Lucifer bound and in the meantime, break the Righteous Man so Heaven won’t even have Michael’s destined host ready for the Final Battle. Leading the other side, Wei Wuxian, infamous upstart, who wants to rescue the Righteous Man and restore him to life, tear Lilith’s guts out through her nose, and also stop her from doing the Lucifer thing because Wen Qing explained that yes, that’s a Thing, and it’s Bad.

Wen Qing! I’ve decided to combine Bela and Ruby’s roles and let WQ be both the cool badass example of how demon deals can go Bad and the demon deliberately leading our heroes astray for most of s3-4. Wen Qing is a very new demon; she used to be some sort of herbalist/witch but then she sold her soul in a crossroads deal to cure her brother of some lingering illness. 10 years of happiness and then boom, hellhounds. WQ is so obviously competent, though, that they (Lilith, I guess?) immediately offers her a job, with the promise threat that gee, that’s a nice brother you’ve got there, even with his Designated Chronic Health Condition getting all relapse-y. It’d be such a shame if something were to...happen to him...

we find this out at some point in last s3 I guess? some Monster of the Week case involves WN as a witness or something, or possible next victim, and WQ shows up to be A Normal Amount Of Invested In This, while desperately trying to avoid actually interacting with her brother (who thinks she’s dead). YES, the truth comes out; YES there’s a tearful reunion

now in s4, Wen Ning is fine actually, health-wise, bc he maybe made a crossroads deal with Wei Wuxian personally, and Wen Qing may or may not have admitted that she’s supposed to be working for Lilith to get WWX ready to host Lucifer? Or potentially that comes out later, idk. Either way, she’s 100% his top lieutenant in this exciting Hell War they’re waging

[insert whatever the hell (ha) happened plot-wise in s4 of supernatural]

we obviously mix up the relationships, too, bc it’s like, *LWJ internal monologue* I’m too young to remember my brother Lucifer as he was before he Fell, but surely Wei Wuxian is his Heir and Destined Vessel in truth, for he is Charismatic and Charming and Makes Me Feel Things, with his Clearly Feigned Righteous Drive and Compassion for All God’s Creatures and - why does heat keep pooling in the lower abdomen of my vessel when I look at his lips, which I am definitely doing a Normal and Not-Weird Amount - I’m just keeping an eye out for the famed Silver Tongue, and not in any way wondering how it would feel in my own mouth -

it’s actually DEFINITELY plausible for Lucifer to still be released even if our designated Heir Apparent is using his demon powers to his full potential and no one’s lying to each other about their motives. You just need to let Lilith be more scary too, and especially bc by “no one” I mostly mean Wen Qing; the angels are still totally hiding the fact that they, too, want to jumpstart the shit out of this apocalypse.  LWJ decides at the last minute that that’s a bad idea actually, gets himself discorporated to send JC to intercept WWX because he accidentally releases Lucifer, etc. etc. Oh yeah, the boys were def fighting before this, bc JC has actually fairly reasonable concerns about the sort of things WWX is getting up to in his quest to become King of Hell...

SO

...I neither know nor care what happens in s5

it does end with both Lucifer and Michael locked in the cage probably, bc I rather liked that solution. Fuck both of ‘em, basically.

I was toying with the idea that WWX also found Madam Yu in whatever hellish torment she was suffering after making a deal so her idiot son(s) would survive, and she was leading forces for him in the war against Lilith as well. If she came back to life somehow, body and all, it’d probably be compelling if she offered her own body to Michael - bc it’s her lineage! - and we’re all led to believe that she’s, uh, being a bitch and actually wants to risk destroying the world in order to destroy all demons...but then she seizes back control and flings herself/Michael and Lucifer into the Pit, because she’s just That Hardcore?

which means we’d actually have had her around and having characterization for most of s4-5, too, which would be fun

More importantly, it ends with newly crowned King of Hell Wei Wuxian appointing Wen Qing as Queen-Regent and ditching to go on an indefinite honeymoon with his new angel boyfriend (they’re going to fuck for like three weeks straight, then roll up their sleeves and go conquer Heaven in the name of free will), and Jiang Cheng gets to live out his hitherto-unknown-to-himself life’s ambition to be the sugar baby of the Queen of Hell. It’s very Hades/Persephone, except he goes back down to the underworld at least once a month. He gets his own demon squad whom he trains up in all the hunting techniques and it’s gr9. Wen Qing is reforming the crossroads deal process to make it more fair to the humans.

the end

Addenda:

it should go without saying but Jiang Yanli is definitely a recurring character, like, at least once a season there’s a filler episode where they go to Jiang Yanli’s for dinner and have to get along as a family, and also do the much easier job of defeating some sort of terrible demon that gets loose in the bunker and turns the evening into a horror movie. She’s their main research/emotional check-in person, a la Bobby, more often appearing in later seasons when there’s, uhhh, more to emotionally check in about.

Jin Zixuan is actually a perfectly competent hunter; he’s just a priss and we don’t Like him

we like Mianmian, though. Oh, I guess the official Hunter’s Guild or w/e tries to declare WWX a public enemy on account of the whole “King of Hell” thing and she’s like “actually what if you’re morons and assholes?” and joins hte team in s4 or 5? Yeah.

idk how the 3zun disaster happens in this ‘verse but I do encourage it to be happening in slow motion as a recurring subplot for several seasons. NMJ is a hunter, LXC is obv an angel, and JGY is...I wanna say one of the more human monsters, like a vampire? Or, you know, something that could be born from JGS sleeping with someone/something he shouldn’t have

[spoondrifts]

long post ahead I'm sorry-

crack au where Jonah Magnus is a good guy but everything keeps going wrong and he spends all of his time running around trying to stop his employees from diving headfirst into their Fuck Up™ of the week

in this au Jonah is almost entirely incompetent but he's got the exasperated parent thing down enough to make up for his lack of braincells

he's also at least 7% dumber than he is in canon

s1 Jon: please call pest control there are so many worms

s1 Elias: I already did

Jon: and??

Elias: they ate them

Jon: the worms?

Elias: the pest control guys. the worms ate them

Elias spends the entirety of season 2 desperately trying to convince Jon that none of them killed Gertrude (in this au Gertrude just had a stroke or something in the tunnels). Elias stops Jon from destroying the table but a week later something heavy falls on it and the NotThem escapes anyway. Elias bashes in Leitner's head with a pipe after mistaking him for the monster and Jon gets framed.

now Elias has to convince this hunter that Jon is innocent while Jon runs around and harasses various fear avatars (who are all very amused with Elias' wayward Archivist). Jon assumes Elias knows nothing about all this bullshit because Elias is just his weird and uptight boss who accidentally killed someone, he can't possibly know that there are literally fear gods ruling over them

olive ⚰ has named the group 'Avatars ✨'

JMagnus 👀: Jude please don't hurt him. I'll explain everything when he gets back to the Institute.

🔥: too late

JMagnus 👀: What?

🔥: too late

🔥: burned him

[JMagnus 👀 is typing]

JMagnus 👀: Where is he now.

🔥: going to mike

JMagnus 👀: Mike Crew???

🔥: ya

Elias RACES to Mike's house but he. he fucking misses them. the Beholding helpfully tells him that they're all going back to the Institute so Basira and Daisy can interrogate him, which isn't ideal, he'd really like to not go to jail, so he drafts up an employment contract on the way back and barely manages to escape the whole thing with his life intact.

then he explains everything to Jon because if Jon is going to end up being the Archivist, being uninformed won't do. Jon becomes the Archivist completely on accident and Elias is desperately trying to make all of this work because, haha, the Unknowing is coming up, and Elias is not in the fucking mood to deal with clowns.

olive ⚰ has named the group 'all that is terror uwu'

spidey🕸: lmfaooo jonah how do you make an archivist on accident

JMagnus 👀: He stumbled into it. All I can do now is ensure he doesn't die.

JMagnus 👀: Or get further injured by the rest of you.

🔥: woops

🎭: hEy gUyS lOnG tiMe nO sEe

🎭: gEt iT eLiAs

🎭: sEe

JMagnus 👀: Beholding puns are not amusing from a manifestation of the Stranger.

🎭 has named the group 'eLiAs bE niCe tO niKoLa cHaLlEnGe'

🔥: haha

spidey🕸: I'm sure Nikola will be on her best behavior

🎭: yEaH i wOnT kiDnAp yOuR aRcHiViSt

[JMagnus 👀 is typing]

mike n ike: hey guys what'd I miss

🔥: arent you dead

mike n ike: yeh but I came back

JMagnus 👀: NIKOLA ORSINOV WHERE IS JONATHAN SIMS

🔥: can't you see haha

mike n ike: heh "see"

JMagnus 👀: NIKOLA

spidey🕸: wow he must be pissed

spidey🕸: he left out the punctuation

JMagnus 👀: I WILL BREAK ALL OF YOUR PLASTIC BONES WHERE'S MY ARCHIVIST

🎭 has left the chat.

JMagnus 👀: what the FUCK

since he's still a coward Elias sends Michael to go fetch Jon, only finding out after the fact that he very nearly almost signed Jon's death warrant. Elias is now speedrunning Jon's development because fuck the Unknowing is coming up really quickly and Tim is a self destructive mess and Melanie keeps trying to stab Elias and Martin is a pining idiot and goddammit he didn't sign up for this

Elias prepares Jon the best he can for the Unknowing, because even though he knows the ritual will fail, the Circus can still cause a considerable amount of damage and he needs them out of the way.

the Unknowing happens. Jon ends up in a wack ass coma, Tim is dead, Daisy's in the coffin, and Basira is starting to look like the better choice of Archivist because jesus christ Jon has no self preservation instinct. Elias doesn't get arrested this time around but his ex husband starts coming by the Institute and fucking with all his employees. and the Flesh is attacking. jesus. goddamn.

olive ⚰ has named the group 'bully elias'

JMagnus 👀: Why are you all so mean to me? I'm arguably the nicest one here.

🔥: ur joking right

Peter Lukas: you're not nice you didn't buy me an anniversary gift 😢😢😢

JMagnus 👀: I was busy.

Peter Lukas: doing what

JMagnus 👀: Stopping the Flesh from destroying my Institute. Besides, you didn't remember my birthday.

Peter Lukas: you're 200 years old how could I remember 😓

helen!!!!!: We All Know I'm The Nicest One Here!!

JMagnus 👀: How did you make your text that colorful?

helen!!!!!: IDK

JMagnus 👀: Liar.

helen!!!!!: That's Literally My Job

olive ⚰: hey eli your archivist just woke up I think

🔥: ew why

helen!!!!!: How Delightful!! Maybe I'll Throw Him A Glad You're Alive Party!!

olive ⚰: should we invite him to this chat since he's an avatar now

Peter Lukas: no 🙅 🚫❌

Peter Lukas: I hate archivists 😤😤

olive ⚰: still mad about gertrude huh

🔥: were all still mad about gertrude

🔥: but jons fine once you burn some manners into him

JMagnus 👀: Can you all please stop hurting Jon? Or talking about hurting him? I would like my Archivist to not acquire any more scars.

🔥: damn

Peter Lukas: damn 😔

Elias keeps trying to teach Jon how to pick certain victims to feed off of because personally he has no qualms about feeding from innocents but Jon!! actually trusts him!!! so Elias doesn't want to push Jon into making decisions that will offend his moral sensitivities.

things are actually going okay for a while. Elias starts going home at a reasonable time in the evenings and Jon is actually getting some sleep. and then-

Elias is having a nice dream about Peter trying to fish Simon Fairchild out of a sky filled with eyes when he abruptly sits up in bed, wide awake.

"Ah, fuck," he says to Peter, who is laying on the floor where it is Lonelier™. "Jon's doing something stupid. I Know it."

Peter's mumbled "isn't he always" goes unnoticed as Elias hurries to the Institute, where he finds a fucking rib on Jon's desk and the coffin in the middle of the room.

Peter Lukas has named the chat 'archivists ruin my sleep schedule and my sex life'

JMagnus 👀: What the fuck do I do?? I can't go into the Buried! Why is Jon so stupid? I didn't know he had zero braincells when I hired him!

🔥: ngl why havent you fired him yet

JMagnus 👀: Beholding won't let me. We're all bound to the Institute.

🔥: F

JMagnus 👀: Why are there no Buried avatars in here? Please someone help me.

mike n ike: lol the buried is gross why would anyone go down there

spidey🕸: does he have an anchor?

[JMagnus 👀 sent an image]

🔥: is that a fucking rib

spidey🕸: wow that's not a good anchor at all

spidey🕸: he needs someone he loves

JMagnus 👀: Thanks. Gtg.

spidey🕸: np

🔥: are we not going to talk about his rib

🔥: how the fuck did he get that out of his body

🔥: yall

🔥: YALL

it takes three days for Elias to find Martin.

"Please tell me why the fuck you're dabbling in the Lonely," Elias says as Martin steps sheepishly out of the fog.

"Ah. Well. Jon can't See into it very well and sometimes we like to spice up our se-"

"Stop before I have to gouge my eyes out again."

"A-Again-?"

Elias drags Martin back to the Institute. Martin starts setting tapes on the coffin because "Jon loves these" and Elias starts bashing his head into the wall.

Jon climbs out of the coffin with Daisy and Elias almost considers locking Jon in his office so the damn archivist can't do anything else ridiculous. instead, Elias very calmly takes Jon by the shoulders, and shakes him like a rag doll.

"Stop fucking with entities, you stupid, stupid man," Elias says, shaking Jon more viciously now.

after several hours of breathing exercises Elias returns to his house and doesn't take his Sight off of Jon for the rest of the night, which is a fun experience for Peter when he wakes up and finds Elias' bloodshot eyes staring directly at him in the morning.

JMagnus 👀 added Daisy to 'archivists ruin my sleep schedule and my sex life'

Peter Lukas has named the chat 'archivist hate club'

JMagnus 👀 has named the chat 'shut up peter'

Peter Lukas has named the chat 'you love jon more than me'

JMagnus 👀 has named the chat 'I don't love either of you I'm heartless'

Peter Lukas has named the chat 'I want a divorce'

spidey🕸: jeez take your marital dispute elsewhere

spidey🕸 has named the chat 'lonelyeyes dni'

Daisy: wtf is this

mike n ike: it's a chat for avatars

mike n ike: and ex avatars ig

Daisy: didn't I kill you

mike n ike: yea

JMagnus 👀: Hello, Daisy. Welcome to the group chat.

Daisy: why is Jon not in here

Peter Lukas: because I hate him 😁

spidey🕸: Elias talks mad shit in here and Jon would get offended

Daisy: if you talk bad about Jon I'll rip your throat out

Daisy: :)

JMagnus 👀: Noted.

mike n ike: he's kinda rude tho

Daisy: I've killed you once

Elias' only goal now is to keep Jon and his assistants from pulling any more wild stunts without his supervision. his renewed involvement with the archival staff results in a few things he'd hoped to avoid: drink invites, physical contact (Martin is surprisingly quick to start hugging Elias once he realizes Elias won't stop him), and- shudder -feelings. because Elias genuinely cares about his staff and doesn't want any harm to befall them. especially Jon. Jon is his Archivist, the only one to ever succeed like this, and Elias will be damned if he lets anything happen to him.

"Why do you care?" Jon asks, once, compulsion thrumming like static on his tongue. "About us, I mean. I would've assumed you'd want to perform the Beholding's ritual."

Jonah Magnus attempted the Watcher's Crown once, when he was young and new. he'd brought his patron close, but not all the way through, and the backlash of power killed all the inmates at Millbank and severely crippled Jonah's connection to the Eye for months afterward. he grew to assume that the Beholding simply preferred the world as it was--ripe with fear for watching. it didn't need a ritual.

he instead dedicated himself to growing stronger, cultivating his Institute of knowledge, his stronghold. if he tore out a few people's eyes when he got too old, then, well, collateral. but he doesn't want the world to end, and knows now that no ritual will ever succeed unless it brings in all the Powers at once. and he doesn't want that either.

it's concerning to him that Jon seems to be collecting marks regardless. the only ones he's missing are the Dark and the Lonely, and Elias is determined to keep it that way.

he explains all of this to Jon who, to his credit, takes it pretty well. Jon is fascinated with historic life and Elias spends some time simply recounting tales of his youth, when he still bore the name Magnus.

they bond. it's good.

and one day Basira does a little too much research and discovers the dark sun waiting in Ny Alesund. she insists they need to go and see what's left of the People's Church, they need to ensure everything is taken care of. Jon is rather insistent too. and Elias wouldn't have been inclined to let them go, except Peter was finally home after weeks at sea, and it wasn't like Jon was defenseless, he could call Elias if anything went wrong...

so, very reluctantly, Elias gives them the all clear. Basira, Jon, and Martin head north, and Elias almost forgets they've gone when he arrives home and Peter already has dinner prepared.

Jon comes back marked by the Dark.

Elias curses himself, over and over, for being foolish enough to let them go, for not keeping a closer eye on them. he knows the ritual won't work unless a certain incantation is spoken, so he'll just have to keep world-ending written chants away from Jon. easy. and it's not like Jon will even get marked by the Lonely. Peter wouldn't.

(but Martin doesn't have the same level of control, and sometimes...)

it's an accident. Martin and Jon are testing it, pushing the boundaries, when Martin pulls them both into the Lonely. Elias threatens divorce until Peter caves and fetches them, but it's too late. Jon has been marked by all fourteen Powers.

Elias tells him, and warns him to check everything he reads.

helen!!!!! has named the chat 'apocalypse babey'

JMagnus 👀: How are you doing that?

JMagnus 👀: And the apocalypse is not imminent. I have the situation under control.

olive ⚰: ha yeah

JMagnus 👀: What do you mean by that?

olive ⚰: nothing

JMagnus 👀: Well, now I certainly think it's something.

olive ⚰: it's just

olive ⚰: don't you think it's kinda weird that @spidey🕸 has been offline for so long

🔥: thats weird shes always online

JMagnus 👀: Oliver, what are you implying?

olive ⚰: idk

olive ⚰: just weird, that's all

🔥: never good when the spiders are quiet

olive ⚰: hear hear

Elias gets a sinking feeling in his stomach, and beside him, Peter looks alarmed. meanwhile, in his flat with Martin making tea in the other room, Jon has a statement clutched in his grasp.

Hello, Jon.

I would apologize for the deception, but I'm afraid that's quite what I'm good at. I'm not one to monologue, that's more Jonah's shtick, so shall we get on with things?

I admit I underestimated Jonah Magnus. He's still remarkably easy to manipulate, but when he abandoned the Watcher's Crown ritual I knew I would have to take a different approach. The Mother is not so satisfied with the world as she may have insinuated. It is our turn to rise, Jon.

At the age of eight, you were marked by us. We sent you to the Magnus Institute in the hopes that a new Archivist would rekindle Jonah's desire to end the world. Unfortunately, it seemed as though he grew fond of you, and so we brought in a new plan. We marked you. One fear at a time. Jonah gave an admirable attempt at protecting you, but ultimately, he is an incompetent old fool, and I am a Weaver. Even Jonah Magnus dances to invisible strings.

Everyone underestimates a spider until it bites. Poison is poison, Jon, regardless of the medium in which it is served.

You will be safe in this new world. Martin, too. Perhaps even Jonah and his Lukas, if the Mother deems them worthy.

Now, please repeat after me...

Jon reads the ink scratched words, eyes welling up with tears and hands trembling, as thunder crashes outside and a howling gale picks up beyond the windows. Martin is shouting something, there's the crawling press of Elias' gaze as it rests heavy behind Jon, a silent observer. He can feel Elias' soothing presence, cool and calm in the raging storm.

Elias is still watching out for him.

Strings are wrapped around his wrists, jerking his arms up in a poor mockery of religious regard, strange hysterical laughter clawing out from his throat.

Jon's tears run red. Somewhere, Elias is still watching.

The door opens.

[handonhaven]

So a few things popped into my head, and will most likely stay there for a while.

1. This whole long hair thing with Landon. I refuse to believe they went through all that trouble just for a ten second scene. I believe they did all of that because we're gonna get a flashback episode so we can find out what happened to Landon and how malivore ended up possessing him. And I think this because I like to thing that episodes Aria wasn't in at the beginning of the season/or episodes he was in only a scene or two that's when he was filming the flashback episode. Because sometimes they do film episodes out of order for whatever reason. And I will go on believing this until October when I'm either proven wrong or hopefully proven right.

2. When this thought popped into my head I got mad and sad all at the same time. Because this is now the second time they've separated Handon from each other for months at a time. NOT once but twice they did that. First with Hope jumping into malivore and everyone forgetting her. So the whole summer and a couple months into the new school year they were away from each other. Then again when Landon ended up in malivore. So they were separated again for another two, two half months maybe. I refuse to believe it's any long than that. Since seasons 2&3 are one school year. My reasons for thinking that is because the season 2 final(3x04) was Handons 1 year anniversary and they started dating about half way through the first school in season 1. But anyways I don't I'll ever be able to forgive the writers for doing that to them. Just like I don't think I'll ever forgive them for giving us a whole season without the real Landon.

3. So I have this theory. So you know how there's been this pattern the last two season finals with either Hope getting separated from Landon or Landon getting separated from Hope. Well I think if they keep up with that pattern then the real season 3 final will be Handon getting separated from everyone else. I'm not sure how or why it'll happen but I think it might. But I like to think that when they get malivore out of Landon, Handon leaves to follow some type of leave. Or maybe Clarke does what he tends to always do and he screws them over and they somehow end up in the prison world or trapped in a alternate reality(I think that could be fun to see).

4. What is up with people trying to say that Landon is dead just because malivore is possessing his body. That's not how possession works, the person doesn't just die because someone takes over their body. That's never happened in the history of posseson in the TVDU(or any other show I've seen). And if Landon was really "dead" then what would be the point of those Handon flashbacks during that inspirion scene? I mean come out is peoples dislike and misplaced hatred for Landon run that deep and they'll try to come up with anything just to kill him off? You know what let me not good down that rabbit hole.

5. Okay I don't mind maliLandon being a thing for now. But I just don't want it to last very long. Because I want to real Landon back. And for him to finally be out of pain(again I don't think I'll forgive the writers for putting him through that). I know malivore will be more active in season four but just let it be in a different body not Landons. After this season I want him to be done going through trauma for a long while(and Hope) like just give him half a season with nothing bad happening to him or even a whole season with nothing bad happening to him. I know the chances of that happening are very slim but I can dream can't I.

6. So I saw this theory and I'm not sure how they came up with that or even if they were kidding. But they think that Ethan might be one of Malivore kids. I don't think that's the case, I truly believe that Ethan is just human. I feel like he couldn't be one of malivore's kids because he can be compelled and because his mom was never erased from peoples mind. And Landon can't even before he activated his powers back in season 1. And honestly I just want Ethan to be the one human teenager on the show. I know this show is about supernaturals but that's doesn't mean every character we met should be or has to be supernatural. But maybe that's me. Any thoughts on this theory?

7. You know I wouldn't be agaisnt seeing more of malivore's kids. We know for a fact that Landon is the youngest and last kid malivore had(at least we know that as a fact as of right now. They might change their minds about that). And Clarke is the oldest out of all his childrens. But what about the others kids malivore had. Are any of them still alive and if they are where are they? Are they all like Clarke personality wise or are some of them like Landon? I don't know I feel like that could be fun and nice storyline to do at some point if they ever decide to.

8. I feel like triad might be making a come back for next season. Because this season triad was mention a quite a few times. So maybe they'll come back into play next season. Like maybe MG finds out about another facility from his mom or something.

Wow that got longer than I meant too lol. Came here to talk about 3 things and ended up talking about eight. Lol my mind just got the better of me and I just needed to keep going.

I’ve thought the same thing. If they really pinned his hair back for all those months just for that one brief scene, I’m gonna laugh. Because why on earth would they go to all that effort for a small detail like that? It’s not like they’ve been consistent or realistic about other little things like that, so it had to have been for flashbacks. And my thoughts exactly. I had also wondered if that’s why he wasn’t in 3x14 or 3x15, because apparently, some contracts require the actors to have episodes off (which was why he wasn’t in 2x14 I guess). So if he had been filming flashbacks earlier on, maybe that’s why they were required to give him time off during 3x14/3x15? But it would make sense if he had filmed back during like 3x07 or something when his hair was long. That’s really what I’m hoping. And yeah, if we don’t get it in October, I’m gonna cry.

Ugh, yep. I realized that as well, they separate them every season. The writers are cruel. Yeah, literally, it’s like every summer/into the new school year! And yes, I’m not sure exactly how long with Landon though, but it would’ve had to have been at least a couple months? But the whole timeline for season 3 has made no sense. I had thought season 1 started in like February or something, since the twins’ birthday is in March (1x06), so I figured Handon got together like middle/end of March (1x08). Then Hope would’ve jumped into Malivore around April/May, then we got a new school year throughout season 2. But then 3x04 is when it gets confusing, because I figured that was probably around April, since 2x15 would’ve been mid-March because it was the twins’ birthday again. But then with 3x05, they had the “3 weeks later” and then in 3x06, it seemed like a new school year was suddenly starting? And not long after, they were dressing for colder weather in coats and stuff, so what happened to the summer? They should’ve just said “3 months later” in 3x05, that would’ve made sense. So I have no idea what time of year it is in the show now. Some people thought it was spring again because of some posters at the high school? So who knows how long Landon was actually gone, I’m confused... sorry to go off on a tangent about the timeline haha. But anyway, they’ve still been separating Handon every season for way too long, and it’s terrible. I don’t think I can forgive them either, and same thing with Landon! I still can’t believe we went almost an entire season without him! I’ll never be over it.

Ooh, interesting... okay, I would actually love that haha. If they’re gonna be separated again, let it be together. I’ll take it! But yeah, it could happen. Maybe something will go wrong or they’ll get screwed over, but they’d be together this time around. But I feel like them ending up in a prison world again would be so repetitive, but I wouldn’t even be surprised haha. I think it would be fun to see too though. I had actually thought that might happen in 3x04 when they both were in the prison world, but that did not last long. But who knows, it’d be nice to see something different though, but I’m not sure what other alternate reality they could end up in. But I’m sure the writers could come up with something. Even if it was like a chambre de chasse or something where they had to be put in one of those for whatever reason, that would also be nice because they could get a break and be together that way. I think as long as they’re together and not separated from each other again, I’ll be happy (I think haha). And if they could finally have a break on top of that and be able to recover after everything, that would be ideal.

And I have no idea. Exactly, have they not seen the rest of TVDU? That didn’t happen, and I don’t think I’ve seen that happen in other shows either. So true, we saw Landon’s memories in that scene, that came from Landon so he can’t be gone. Yeah, those people are just so desperate for him to be gone, they’ll try to come up with anything to give themselves hope. They thought he was dead for good after he was stabbed by the golden arrow too. And after they spent an entire season showing how much Hope loves Landon, idk how anyone could possibly think they’re just gonna get rid of him.

I’m a bit torn when it comes to Malilandon. Because on the one hand, I feel it needs to last a significant amount of time. They’ve been building up to it since season 1, this is the main villain of the show finally achieving his goal (part of it anyway), so it’s a huge deal. And I feel they shouldn’t rush through it, plus Aria does such an amazing job, I want to see more of him playing that. But on the other hand, I need Landon back now. I want him out of pain too because I cannot believe all that the writers have put him through. I just want him to be okay again. And one of the issues as well is that he has been possessed for a long time, at least a few weeks now, maybe even a month or so, but they didn’t show it when I feel they should have. But I feel like they could make up for that by showing flashbacks of what Malivore has been up to all this time, and that way we would see more Malilandon, but they could get Malivore out of Landon sooner without it feeling too rushed and like we hadn’t seen as much of Malilandon maybe? Idk, them keeping Landon’s time in the prison world and Malilandon a secret made for some good plot twists, but I’m not sure it was worth it tbh. Because now there could be problems with us not seeing as much of that as we should. I would’ve preferred them letting the audience know what was going on with Landon and showing it throughout the season, while still keeping the other characters in the dark. But yes, if Malivore is still a big part of season 4, he had better not be in Landon anymore. I can’t imagine he will be though. And I completely agree, they better leave Landon alone after this. He and Hope shouldn’t have to go through anymore trauma at all, but at the very least, they need a break. True though, unfortunately, I don’t think they’ll let them have a whole season without something bad happening either.

I can’t see Ethan being one of Malivore’s kids. I think, besides Landon obviously, most of Malivore’s children would be pretty old. And they’ve implied throughout the whole show that Landon is the one child of his that was actually born, which took a very long time for him to achieve. I just can’t imagine he would’ve done that twice around the same time since Ethan and Landon are probably around the same age? At least within a couple years of each other? Plus you’re right about the compulsion thing too, that’s a big giveaway. And also, I think his mom would’ve mentioned something about it, like how Seylah knew, if that had happened. But she wasn’t at all aware of anything supernatural before. So if that ended up being true, that would be extremely weird I think, and would feel very forced and out of nowhere. And I’d like for Ethan to stay a human too. True, I feel like they could bring more humans into the show without everyone being supernatural, so it might be a nice change to have a human as one of the mains.

I’ve thought about that too, and I don’t think I’d mind seeing other children of Malivore either, as long as it was done well, of course. Because yeah, what happened to the rest of them? It’d be very interesting to see if there are others who are still around and if they also hate Malivore and want him gone, or if there are some who would side with him. That could make for some good new characters or villains. And if there were some who were good like Landon, I’d like to see Landon interact with them and maybe have some sort of sibling relationship with them too. So I agree, there’s definitely potential for some cool storylines.

Yeah that could be true. They really just kinda dropped triad after season 1. Where did they all go? They’re still out there somewhere so you’d think they’d go back to that at some point. And yes, something could happen with MG and his mom. And also, is he not curious what happened to his mom and the rest of triad? You’d think they’d try to find out what’s going on with them after what happened when they’ve supposedly disappeared. So yeah, I’d say there’s a chance they’ll bring triad back at some point.

Haha, I feel that though. There’s just too much that goes on in this show, it’s easy to go on about it.

[just-anka]

I realised I haven’t really regularly posted here since like... I don’t even know, September? It’s been a while, anyway. A lot happened, and I now feel like actually writing a post for the first time in a while, so here goes haha. The first bullet point is entirely work waffle so feel free to skip. Apologies in advance for the fact that this post will probably reach novel length by the time I’m done. 

• I took a week off in late September before Ben started his new job so we could go to the mountains for a bit, and it was a much-needed little break from work. And pretty much right after I got back, work got completely mental - nothing bad as such, just one thing after the other, loads of deadlines, so many important things. First I was finishing up data for a paper (first authorship was being debated which is partially why I threw myself into the job so much, but it looks like it’ll be the PhD student before me’s now, which is how it should be tbh, it’s much more hers than it is mine), then the date for my first committee meeting was set and I suddenly had only two weeks to prepare (did not think it was going to be that short notice, whoops, had a very stressful two weeks but all went well - for us, this meeting means presenting our research plan and preliminary data to a committee of four professors so they can give you input, it’s not suuuper formal but still pretty stressful), then I had to write the report for that (I love writing so that one was okay), then there was suddenly a lot to do for a really important cooperation with a company (big money responsibility which stressed me the fuck out), and then, just as I thought I was pretty much done for the year, I realised I needed my lab book up to date for my end of year meeting with my PI (which wouldn’t be such a big deal, except I didn’t have a lab book at the time. Never got around to starting one. So nine months of lab book were written within another very stressful week). Whew. Even writing this out makes me feel like that was a lot haha. 

• After the end of year discussion, I really was done for the year - I officially worked until the 23rd but there was not that much actual work happening, and with the pressure off after months, I properly crashed for a few days. Ben left for England on the weekend after to see his family for christmas etc, and I spent most of that weekend sleeping and doing very little. It was needed. Then my mum came to visit me for the holidays and we had four really lovely days together, also involving a lot of chilling (the only actual thing we did was that magical winter hike that I posted some pictures of the other day). 

• And now I’m skiing! I was planning to go to England as well for NYE to see Ben’s family, but with the corona situation escalating again lately I decided it was too risky for just a few days. So I made a last-minute plan to go skiing by myself instead, because all that involves is a 2 hour train journey. I’m actually staying in a hotel too, which I’ve never done by myself before, I’m usually a dorm in a hostel type of person, but well. Covid has changed a lot of things :D trying to stay safe and away from people, which is of course not entirely possible in a ski resort, but it’s going okay. The skiing itself is great, it’s really nice having some time to go at my own pace and a few days in a row. Today was day 4 and I’ve really found my groove again (more on that later). There’s not much snow though so not many off-pisteing opportunities :/ I’m staying until Monday and then it’s back to work on Wednesday. 

• Speaking of skiing, we’ve got season passes this year, my first season and Ben’s second. We’ve just been doing on the weekends so far - since the 21st of November I just realised while looking back in my calendar! That’s one hell of an early season start haha. We did just one day three weekends and then one full weekend right before Ben left. The first few days were bloody hard. For context, I learned to ski before I learned to walk and loved it as a child, then stopped for a few years because I felt like I wasn’t progressing anymore and was getting bored with it, basically. Then last January I went to France with Ben and his skiing friends and got introduced to freeriding and the idea of ski touring, and now I’m back to loving it haha. I’d ideally like to not have to resort ski anymore at one point (meaning touring) because I know it’s terrible from an environmental standpoint but... idk. It’s currently my only option, and I love it a lot, so I guess it feels okay? Anyway, since I learned to ski so early, it’s the one sport that I’ve always been pretty good at and like, never get scared, at least not on piste. Until this year. The first three individual days were just all kind of horrible, the conditions weren’t ideal with very hard surface and tons of ice and pretty busy slopes, and only steep terrain open as well (Engelberg, our “home” resort - we have a season pass that encompasses a bunch of resorts so we’re not limited to one - is literally dead flat beginner’s slopes, which weren’t open in the beginning, or red runs that should be black and black lol). Pairing loads of ice with my old skis which barely have an edge anymore was... not ideal. I was so scared constantly and it made me like I lost all my ability etc etc. But yeah, turns out I just needed a few days and some easier conditions to get back into it, and now ice and steep stuff and everything is fine again. Who would’ve thought. (a sensible person, probably). 

• But then, the full weekend we skied in December was awesome! Saturday already felt much better and then it snowed a bunch over night and Sunday we spent all day powder skiing, basically. I learned SO much and just had an absolute ball! Definitely one of the best days skiing I’ve had, and one of the best days recently in general. 

• Plus that whole weekend was just lovely, car camping in a campsite full of huge campervans was pretty fun :D I love the looks we get when people see the car and clearly wonder where we sleep. And we’ve got our setup perfected for winter now so both the nights were toasty. Friday night we had dinner in “bed” watching a movie, and Saturday night we sat in the little kitchen (the campsite has it open for everyone, but everyone else there has a camper, so it doesn’t seem to be used much) drinking tea and playing cards and ahh. Camping in the mountains. My ideal life eh? (though the weekend before this wonderful one, we got snowed in because it dumped over a metre over night completely unexpectedly and that was stressful as hell, but I think that’s a story for another day, if ever, I’m kind of trying to forget that day :’D) 

• Yesterday I also finally took the plunge and ordered new skis. Been debating for ages which ones to get but I’ve finally decided and I’m now very excited! 

• Ok this post so far reads as “work and skiing” which is pretty much what November and December were and probably what January is going to be too haha. Ben and I want to ski another week together end of January as well, and there’s some big exciting work things coming up as well. 

• Even though I have to admit, now that I’m on a break, I’ve spent a lot of time dreading work and questioning my career choices and all of that lark... sigh. I love my job most of the time, but I kind of hate having a job? If that makes sense? Sometimes (okay a lot of the time) I just wish I had more time for other things that I care about. But I also now I��m lucky to have that job, especially this year, and lucky to have a job I don’t hate, and get to do a lot of fun stuff on the side, even if it often means little sleep and downtime. 

• Speaking of things I care about, I was on a proper roll with writing for a few days before and after Christmas. It’s ebbed off again a bit, but it was still pretty cool, and my totally-useless-all-cheese-project is now 33,000+ words long and like, half-way there story wise. Had a lot of fun with that. 

• Lastly, Ben is still in England, and he’s coming back next Sunday, and I can’t wait! I miss him so much when we’re not together it’s actually silly. Although it’s less stressful this time than the last few times because... we live together, his work just offered him an unlimited contract from January, and I’m stuck here for another 2-3 years, so it looks like we’ll actually get to be in the same place for now. Which is all I wished for last year, and I’m so damn grateful - that stability really is the best thing 2020 has brought for me. And, as he said, even though we were apart for the start of the new year, it will hopefully bring more time together than any previous year ♡

• Okay I think this is long enough now, if you actually made it until here you’re a hero and I will try and post a bit more regularly again now to avoid this size of mind dump :’D I hope you all got into the new year alright, it feels very strange to me that it’s 2021 because I actually slept through midnight on new year’s for the first time since I was tiny haha but I’m sure a lot of people feel the same way! 

[bestsportmedia]

I’m still in disbelief Leo is not a fcb player anymore. Bruh saurez had a better farewell at least his wasn’t in some dark corner of a press conference room. How could this happen? What’s wrong with the media team at barca? Also I agree I think Leo just wanted to leave ASAP. This is not adding up there is so much more going on behind the scenes.

Anonymous asked: “I don’t think Laporta was 100% honest about what happened… there is more to the story.” Admin there is definitely more to the story. I hope one day we find out what really happened. They way Messi was rushed out is one of the biggest football shocks of the decade. His farewell (I wouldn’t even call it that) was rushed. My guess is that he really feels betrayed and angry after all he’s done for the club they couldn’t keep him. So he decided if he leaves it’s best he leaves ASAP. Part 2) even during today’s press conference he said he was grateful how quickly Psg were able to make the contract. ( he repeated this too) I think he really did want to leave ASAP.

Anonymous asked: This is the biggest transfer in history. What’s worse is the whole reason it happened was Barcelona ran out of money. This is just embarrassing to the club it’s always gonna be remembered the reason why he left. I’m still in disbelief how a multi million dollar company with 100m followers can be in this situation. Biggest shock in the world of football. No one saw this coming a week ago.

Anonymous asked:

This is the biggest transfer in history. What’s worse is the whole reason it happened was Barcelona ran out of money. This is just embarrassing to the club it’s always gonna be remembered the reason why he left. I’m still in disbelief how a multi million dollar company with 100m followers can be in this situation. Biggest shock in the world of football. No one saw this coming a week ago.

Anonymous asked:

There is so much more to the story. I don’t believe this. I honestly think that Laporta and co knew how bad things were from the beginning and that la liga was going to deny them. But they still went through the motions. There’s more to this. I mean look how quick anto unfollowed the club she is clearly angry. It looked like Leo wanted to get out Fast too he so was happy and grateful that Psg made it so easy for him. He mentioned it in multiple interviews. I wonder what really went down

I think the Barca media team was in a shock. They weren't prepared at all. They were posting video and photos that prepared for renewal announcement. We don't know really know happened but imo there was  lack of planning ahead (on both side). Messi has done a lot for Barcelona & the club have also done a lot for him. Sad it ended like this.

Anonymous asked:

You were right fcb needs a damn reality show 😂 soooo much drama. Antonela did really unfollow the club. And the new players still not registered. Kun can’t play till October. And what’s with pique? He seems to be having a midlife crisis now that Messi gone. Damn all of this is crazy. Makes me really happy to see psg and fans going above and beyond  welcoming at least. Still in shock the club ran out of money. I don’t think I can ever believe that a multi million company like barca going bankrup

hahaha Pique and his selfies. It’s very easy for companies to go bankrupt.

Anonymous asked:

I never imagined messi would leave barca. Especially in the way he did In a press conference wearing a suit with a room filled with people wearing face masks. If you showed me the images years ago I would be like wtf is this movie? This is just crazy admin I’m still In  disbelief I’m still waiting for the farewell. Can’t  believe his farewell was in a basketball court. Imagine 1 or 2 years early you would come here and say messi and ramos are teammates and at PSG. And post a video of them

Anonymous asked:

Over a year who would of thought messi would leave Barcelona and wearing a face mask😂 people in history gonna look back at pictures and know about the virus. It’s kind of funny because now all the masks we are so used to at this point. But if you told me this before i would of thought it’s not normal.

Strange times. ya that welcome was good. I mean its messi! he deserves it all.

Anonymous asked:

I wish” (kind of! Bartomeu was still here so people could blame him. He ran. It’s not fair he created the problem but Laporte is the one who getting blamed and getting rage from people in cataluna. I feel like Bartomeu dogded this issue without any repercussions, he escaped

He released statement saying Laporta could have signed messi if he followed his strategy. Which kinda make sense but idk

Anonymous asked:

Did y'all see the video of Leo greeting Laporta before the press conference? it was a cold exchange. The farewell was rushed and Leo seemed like he wanted to get out there ASAP” I noticed too there’s more to the story. antonella in the behind the scenes fawell video she told Laporte him to move inside. She looked mad at him it was at three minute mark

Yes, I saw it. She looked angry especially when you compare it to her interaction with the psg president

Anonymous asked:

Same I don’t understand why last minute. Couldn’t they try to sign earlier. Did they not want to ruin his vaction or sum

Bad time management lol

Anonymous asked:

Admin how are you feeling? right now I just feel so defeated what’s the point of even supporting barcelona when our administration is filled with people who gave us debts. Im still confused so they not have professional lawyers, economist, educated financial advisers to prevent this. I’m shocked like what else could be coming? Although I have these thoughts I’m still always gonna support the team in good and in the bad moments. I hope fans who leave don’t come back when la Masia comes through.

Bad time management lol. They are fake fans. and oh they will come back when things get better. That’s what fake fans do lol

Anonymous asked:

Do you think Laporta lied the entire time? He knew that he couldn’t sign him? I think he didn’t fully disclose the deep terrible situation the club is in and led him and his family on till last minute. I don’t think he ever had plans to except the CVC deal as he never accepted it before this. I feel like it’s an excuse.

Anonymous asked:

The 9 million for depay and other money/wages for signings. Couldn’t that of got to Messi? I just don’t belive this it’s unbelievable a club like barcelona have people to know ahead of time if a contract would get rejected. The have people who hired to know this. They way the announced and the farewell has me suspicious

I can’t tell you if lied (or not) to Leo but he sure lied to the fans. He was tell us that things were going well. My question, whose idea was it to wait till last minute i mean few days before new season starts? why wasn’t his agent pushing for the contract to be signed earlier than that? I understand his entourage trust FCB but this is new board and it’s well know that the club is in bad situation financially. Laporta and Co betrayed him but also his agent failed him. Remember last summer? he had clause that let him leave on free transfer but the clause has deadline. He couldn't leave because his agent sent the burofax past the deadline.

Anonymous asked:

Did you know pochetino was there when Leo made his debut In 2004. He was a player at the time. crazy how life circles back.

He was Espanyol player right? That’s amazing lol

Anonymous asked:

For the anon- they can’t keep leos image up because of the contract. Image right belongs to Paris rn that’s why they are posting him all over insta

Anonymous asked:

They can’t have Messi at camp nou or anywhere associated with the club because psg has image rights. That’s is a big portion of the contract

Thank you guys. @anon

[wolfwhiteflowers]

TWD ending news; thoughts and speculations

 Caryl 📺  💖  Richonne 📽

TWD is ending soon!  -not quite.

Here’s my thoughts on it. the lows and highs. Anyways so yeah 9/9/20 was a crazy TWD news day.(and other tv news too, wtf tv gods. Yeah ..been a crazy tv week.) wtf, why that day? and I guess it’s like an unofficial Caryl day, huh? lol So it’s overwhelming. I wanna write it all out and my feels.    ok I guess I’m not that super excited or invested to it than others..idk I guess the excitement will hit me later or gradual. :P ok...idk I don’t wanna speculate too much. We don’t know much on it still.

So .... they’re/AMC saying TWD show (Rick’s/Grimes show) will end in a super sized s11. TWD finally got an ending plan! lol this show/franchise. I don’t mind that it’s ending or whatever, I mainly want a good story...a good written ending. But it’s all based on how if I still enjoy this show/franchise.. ok. Plus there’s a Caryl spin-off show and anthology spin-off show later on. +movie.

It’s a long post and I kinda mapped it out.

So in a *timeline*, in October it’s the s10 ep 16 “finale” episode. Recently, we’re also getting s10C (coronavirus pandemic bonus episodes) - six episodes I think, in Spring ‘21 (filming in October ‘20). They’re like inbetween episodes to s11. Idk what they’re like. standalone episodes?  And then they’re gonna do the series’s final season, s11, with 24 (12+12)episodes. Idk when it starts.  They film next summer, i guess, and show it in the Fall ’21 and Spring ‘22. Then it’s the spin-off shows, and Caryl..but I wanna focus more on Caryl spin-off show. That will be I guess in ‘23.  ...And a movie(s) :D but everyone’s doubtful and clueless of it but I think it will be filmed next year, ‘21. (and there’s TWD:WB and FTWD soon)

Ok yeah so ldksjfaljdflsj they say it’s sad news that TWD ending but like lol it doesn’t seem like it..from a Caryler I guess, +movie. So, I have theories and I’m like not so sure what’s really gonna happen. I need more info and well we never know what the writers or the future gonna do. Yeah first of all, these plans~~~, and yet we’re in the pandemic and dumb governing on these things. So I’m gonna guess these plans are gonna change or slow down. You never know. Ok.

 I’m also like surprised that there’s gonna be a Caryl spinoff show. (it’s like if they made a Daryl spin-off show. Or any spin-off show..) I mean I didn’t think MMB and NR were still wanting to keep working on TWD/AMC. I thought like any actor..would want to do new things...Ok but they wanna keep working on AMC. NR -I’m not surprised cos he’s like a busy bee..um idk but yeah. Instead of Daryl show it’s now Caryl show from what I suspected-ish. And from the news they sound like it’s a shippy thing. It was also planned since 2018 I think..and “let’s go to New Mexico.” They knew long ago. So, I speculated awhile ago, when we learned that MMB and NR have contracts ending till s12. It’s like we all kinda suspected right that TWD will end in s12 except in episode # count. S10C + s11 (24 episdoes/+8 exra). They combined it earlier. Why earlier Idk...the pandemic? Or Gimple’s plan in franchise timeline? 

So yeah that Caryl spin-off show! Like I hope it means that Caryl are romantic and endgame on this.👀 The more I read on this and thought about it. I don’t want to like get my hopes up too high or whatever. I don’t really trust writers.. eh ...it all depends on the story every time. I also think of the fandom/carylers on how they react to a canon-Caryl or even how the writers will show canon-Caryl. Because writers..like usually writers don’t write canon couples romance well. It’s usually love triangle, reunite a bunch of times, or breakup/makeup a lot. eh. I just hope they make Caryl story good and interesting. Another thing Caryl ship had always been like a subtle ship and angsty. We get bits and bits to keep going ..so a full attention of Caryl or canon-Caryl will be different. I hope it all goes well. :3 It’s all reminds me of Mindy Project show ..there’s always sides in the fandom. Some won’t like it, some will but it’s always about the main couple. Oh, my thoughts of Caryl show is that it will be like Bones, SPN, FTWD, or BeIIarke -_- lol , or something. 

 So from what I read when they already want to keep going with the spin-off show back in ‘18, the Caryl spin-off show will actually cost less than the TWD main show. It’s interesting. It’s all contracts, deals, Netflix, $ stuff. The show might not be international and on netflix, Idk. You know the ratings aren’t that great and most fans left,..but I guess they can still make the Caryl spin-off show. (a season or more idk) I was thinking it might be a Caryl-only show with different cast and set ...or the Caryl spin-off show might actually be just like TWD main show-s10 but different deals $ etc, and they can do whatever. 

Oh, that it’s a spin-off then, and not now in s10 and s11, because the TWD main show will be done adapting the comic book storyline..(instead of thinking of the MMB and NR’s contracts). Yeah one of the theories.. like really Idk why we have Caryl spin-off show when s10 and s11 is pretty much already a Caryl show..with Maggie. But I guess it’s all due with contracts and stuff. And I guess it works timely with the comic storyline. Though the comic storyline parallel/adapting is so different now.  It’s very broad parallels. I guess it all works out in little ways. contracts, comics, and starting fresh. The Caryl spin-off show, they can really get away from the Grimes/Rick storyline which I like that it’s gonna be really separated by being a different show. (I guess also AMC have more control too.) It’s not on the same main show/s10 and on. Like storywise, I like that TWD show is always about the Grimes and it feels like it will be done right and completed to end it in s11 and that is based on comics/and the Grimes (I hope). If that make sense? Rick/Grimes show,is based on comics, will have an ending...TV-wise. Because there’s the movies too supposedly. Yeah maybe I’m not sad..because there’s the Rick movies thing in the works too. I hope s11 will still be about the connection to the Grimes. Like everyone looking after Judith and RJ and figuring out what to do with finding Richonne and stuff. To set up for the movies. (and TWD WB s2?) Because if not, then ugh then AMC should’ve had the main show ended in s10.  Wow.., the show is not based on the comics like it was before and I really can’t speculate s11 and on. Like I hope the writers got juicy stories to tie in with Rick and Michonne, and Maggie/Commonwealth comic stuff. uhh. So yeah Caryl spin-off show it means they can do whatever and writers/me? don’t have to worry that if it’s not connecting with the Grimes storyline. If AMC/Gimple wants to connect everyone.

And one of my theories or hope is that Caryl looks after Grimes kids ...in s11 and search for Rick/Richonne or help him, in part of the bigger plot of Rick movie story, in the spin-off show. Like Caryl will work on plan that later helps out Rick in the movies later on. Yeah and I just think the Rick movies are more like “TWD movies” where all the characters in the franchise will be part of the story. So yeah Rick reunites with everyone. The end, Happy ending! :3 So there’s many ways Caryl show might be like: same cast from TWD show that AMC controls more/Caryl leads/not based on comics(romantic or not), Caryl-only show, or Caryl kinda in part of the Rick movies story-like helping him in some way. etc. Oh, ..I was also thinking it’s like I guess FTWD .. I was also thinking Morgan and his friends might be also be in part of helping Rick’s plans in the Rick movies too.  (.. if Gimple wants to do that.) I hope Caryl will be romantic..I don’t want a “Caryl spin-off show” when it’s just same cast and Caryl still not together. eh. ..Why call it “Carol and Daryl spin-off show”? So I guess it’s gonna be shippy.

So I think the Rick movies (which so far is still happening and three of ‘em.../if) will be after s11 and after TWD WB s2 - ‘21/22.    idk when FTWD comes.

Oct ‘20 - TWD:WB s1

spring ‘21 -TWD  s10C 

summer ‘21? - TWD: WB s2/ends

fall ‘21 and spring/summer ‘22 (or fall ‘22? lol) - TWD s11 

‘22? *rick movie 1? (...with everyone there?)

‘23 Caryl spin-off show s1

‘23 and on? * rick movie 2? movie 3?

....etc.

So...you get it..like it’s like some big overall storyline Gimple is doing. But plans can change and anything could happen. I may be speculating wrong. Who knows. sigh. I just want Team Family reunited with Rick again and a good ending as best as writers can do. :B  If they can’t make a movie(s) then I hope Gimple find a way to end Rick’s story for fans.

sigh yeah tired of the fandom complaining and assuming/speculating wrong. (like hating on the spin-off show when they don’t know what a spin-off show is.) blah. idk. tired of shippers..generalizing. (I ship both Caryl and Richonne so. sigh go away drama) I’m tired of fans being biased and doubting and singling things out. I feel like we all won. But anyway until more news and facts it is what it is. I wanna wait till when things actually happen or news that say something won’t happen.  Keep waiting and hoping on :] *Caryl on*

[aonrivers]

Pregnancy, Birth, Postpartum, and Baby Time! (TMI warning) - Part 02

In Part 01 I went over the truths about being pregnant. Now that the nine (really ten) months are over... Labor and Postpartum begins.

Labor and Postpartum Truths: 1) Not being able to eat sucks once you're admitted into the hospital. You seriously only get ice water like they say online. So make your last meal one that can hold you out until after birth. 2) Contractions feel like really bad period cramps. I'm sure there's some women who feel them worse, but that's all I got on the topic. I was numb for them most of the time. 3) To induce labor, at least for me, they shoved this "shoelace" thing up my you-know-what. As I said before, I was swollen down there, so any time my cervix was checked I was in a lot of pain, and this thing was no different. 4) Hospital rooms are not quiet. Between hearing everyone outside at the nursing station to the beeping in your room, you also have constant visits from nurses when all you wanna do is rest because you're basically waiting for labor to begin. 5) Water breaking isn't a "oh hey I think I peed myself". No. It's like a queef then GUSH and it doesn't stop until you and your bed are soaked. 6) Catheters are handy when you are bed rest and drinking gallons of water. Also, you get one when you get the epidural. Which they don't really tell you until the epidural is offered. 7) Take the epidural if you don't want to experience a natural and painful birth. I felt no pain leading up to labor. I did however feel a shit ton of pain when the pain relief ran out. They tell you it's because labor is all in your back - this excuse is bullshit. I was in so much pain when that shit wore off that my husband said my labor pain face didn't match this one. Once they take the tube out of your back, the pain fades away. But my back still hurts in that spot even as I type this. The pain in the spine also lingers after giving birth. Almost like you need your back seriously cracked. 8) The epidural needle doesn't really hurt if your pain tolerance is high for stuff like this. It's a pinch. What you do feel that is considered almost like a quick throbbing pain is when the fluid is injected. It's like a small punch to your back. 9) Projectile vomit will most likely occur. All the gallons of water you consumed waiting for labor will come projecting out of you before you go into active labor. Be glad your head doesn't start spinning. I up chucked three times and had to have myself redressed and my bedding changed out. 10) Some labor beds have built in handles to assist with labor. See if yours does. They helped a lot. 11) I tore two tiny spots inside my VJ giving birth. They stick a numbing agent where they see you'll be tearing, so that's cool and all - you'll feel it when you start being mobile again. BTW, some women tear bigger. Luckily my baby was only 7lbs. 12) You may not know your labor doctor. I met mine briefly the day before at my doctor's office, but never before that. Don't feel shy about being exposed in front of them though, they do this for a living. 13) Speaking of being shy. I am a prude with my body. I don't want people checking out my ass or having my nipples poking through my shirt on a cold day but all of this goes out the window when you're in the hospital to give birth and here's why. One: this is the doctor and nurse's job. They see boobs, ass, and vagina every day. And two: you're giving birth - who TF cares what you look like. 14) Pushing a baby out is not like pushing pee out. It's like taking the biggest shit of your life. You push with your asshole. Literally. And it causes hemorrhoids and for your ass to hurt WEEKS after giving birth. (Do yourself a favor and get some fiber enriched foods because pooping is not easy it pain free.) 15) Those home videos of the women giving birth don't exist anymore. It's pretty much illegal. I guess people were blackmailing the mother. Idk. That's what my nurse said. But they give you a big ass mirror to watch the birth of your baby so that's really cool. 16) Hospitals offer photographs of your newborn (unless you gave birth in 2020). It's usually expensive and I would've done it too if they offered. My husband got amazing shots of our daughter which I cropped out to make that oval baby picture our parents in the 80s got. 17) Taking pictures of your baby in the nursery is a big no no. I wish I could've seen my baby under the UV lamp with her glasses on to fix her jaundice, but I was bedridden with the pre-eclampsia. Hubby saw her though. He says she was just chilling while all the other babies were crying their heads off. FYI, the reason you can't take pictures is because of the other babies in there. They're not yours. You don't have the right to photograph them even if your baby is mixed in and she's the only one you want the picture of. 18) I wasn't told this until it came time... But they push your belly and I mean in your belly button and hard. They check if your uterus is shrinking and returning in place. (Breastfeeding helps it go faster.) This pushing hurts like a mofo. Seriously. And they don't care if you're in pain from, oh idk - THE EPIDURAL WEARING OFF! They are required to check. 19) My friend told me this which I think is important to know... When you're doped up on pain meds before birth or if you're having a really hard time during the labor process (time  you entered hospital to when the baby pops out), have someone with you. Have that person listen to the words coming out of the doctor and nurse's mouths. My friend didn't and took meds they gave her and was devastated when her baby came out gray and on the edge of death. She didn't know what they gave her or what they said about the meds. If she did, she would've known this would be the outcome of her child's birth (baby lived btw. He just graduated high school last year!) 20) Labor and Delivery nurses are freaking awesome. Postpartum nurses not so much... 21) The hospital food really isn't that bad. At least, it wasn't where I stayed. I had choices for breakfast, lunch, and dinner too! 22) Nurses can't technically tell you no to taking the baby to the nursery. Yes you need bonding time with your baby, but you also need rest. 23) The chair that pulls out into a bed for your partner is uncomfortable af. They have cots. Ask for one. 24) I couldn't have visitors. Make sure you don't either. It's nice. You don't gotta worry about appearance or staying awake for your guest. Birth is about you and your baby (and partner) and the time you have with them. Your guest can wait till you get home. 25) Back to the heartburn and hairy babies talk. This isn't really a myth. My baby came out with a full head of hair, hair on her ears, and fuzz all over her shoulders and back. At a month old it's going away, but that head of hair is real. And so was that heartburn!! 26) Bleeding after birth is like having your period back, but it goes on and on. It changes colors and has a gross smell to it. And wearing a pad again SUCKS! I do have to say though... That mesh underwear they give you is freaking awesome. I want some for my daily wear. 27) For a week or two, I felt like I was punched in the cooch. Walking hurt, getting up hurt, even bathing hurt (no baths until you heal btw, so I showered). Even now, a month later, I still feel pain down there when sitting a certain way (like Indian style). But what do I expect? A freaking baby was pushed out of me!! 28) After the six week heal time is up, don't expect sex to go back to normal. It still hurts for me but this time because of the bruising and stitches. 29) When it's time for sex, lube up. Breastfeeding and hormones still rampant don't assist in easy glide ins (if you know what I mean). 30) When the milk comes in, your boobs get bigger, harder, and start to ache. Feed feed feed or feed and pump. It's the only way to fix it. And don't be surprised when you wake up and your bed is stained with milk puddles because you're still sleeping naked to easily feed your little one at night. My side of the bed is disgusting, but ce la vie! It comes with the territory (like lack of sleep). 31) Also, sleeping on your side with milk filled boobs is not easy. It hurts. Go back to sleeping on your back because belly sleeping isn't comfortable either. 32) Everything you buy or received for your baby screams suffocation with it's warning labels. Don't let it get you paranoid like it did for me. Learn your babies habits and go with your instincts. They also sell baby breathing monitors that alert you if the baby stops breathing. 33) Outfits are cute and irresistible, but try to resist buying those newborn clothes. My baby grew out of them all within three weeks and wore only half of the clothes we had. Also, buy larger clothes - season conscious - that way you're ready when the baby starts growing out of their clothes. We had hardly any 3 month PJs, now her closet is over packed... 34) The baby may not sleep in their crib or bassinet right away. My girl would rather be on me or my husband than a cold bed. Seriously. They want your baby sleeping with nothing but a fitted mattress that's cold and a swaddle or wearable blanket. My baby hates swaddles and kicked too much with the wearable blanket. She sleeps with me for easy feeding and comfort - for me and her. I don't sleep much but slowly I've been getting my Z's and during the day I put her in the bassinet on her belly because I can watch her and she's amazing with that head support already. When she doesn't feed every 2-3 hours, she'll be spending more time on her own in her bed. So don't be discouraged if it's not working for you. It will happen. Just takes time. 35) Sound machine was a waste of a gift. Our phones have sound effects we can tune into. Google Home and Alexa even offer it. My baby doesn't like it, she'd rather listen to us or the TV. Also she doesn't like the dark until she's actually sleeping. She loves bright lights. They tell you the opposite online. 36) If your boobs are small, don't bother getting the shirts where you pull your boob through a window because it won't work. The shirts with the clip that drops to expose the breast are the best. Amazon has great prices and quality shirts on this. My one from Kohl's broke after wearing four times. 37) I really don't think those smiles are gas like they claim it to be. Sure some are. But when your kid smiles without passing gas, they're smiling because they're happy/content. 38) You'll probably end up missing your belly bump the first few weeks like I did. I kept thinking she was still in there. I mean, it's nine months carrying a creature in you. You get used to it. And lastly... 35) You get what you wished for. Any time I talked about having babies, I said keywords on what I wanted: a beautiful, healthy, happy, and smart baby. And I got just that. === So there it is. My journey, my tips, and my nitty gritty of it all of just pregnancy, labor, and postpartum alone!! There is so much more to being a mother; and that will continue in my part 03,04,05,etc to come. IDK how many there will be, only time will tell.

I will continue to update Part 01 and Part 02 when I remember more things.

As Part 03 is conjuring, I would like to say congrats if you're pregnant or gave birth already; and good luck if you're trying.

[kihyunswrath]

@ Starship apologists

ok so let’s pretend for a second they really wanted to help Wonho all this time, and also wanted to be careful to not ruin their own reputation so they could still carry on supporting their remaining artists if it turned out Wonho was indeed guilty of doing... well, nothing really, but in the eyes of joseon dynasty side of the population, they were mortifying sins that made their ancestors turn sides in their graves so yeah whatever. let’s pretend that’s the case.

1) doesn’t mean Wonho’s name needs to be banned and edited out of albums, music videos, tv shows and other content where he was still very much present and part of Monsta X. literally fucking nobody asked that, not even anti fans and those mass medias and prints who were ready to condemn Wonho for, idk, existing. are there chances Wonho himself asked that to be done? ... that’s close to 0, because he was fucking proud of his career, achievements and public presence, and it’s not like monbebes would magically forget him if starship just blurred his face from group pictures, and Wonho isn’t delusional. legal issues? I don’t think so, that would have required them to actually, consistently remove Wonho out of every fucking thing that ever existed, yet they didn’t. they still gained profits off of his work, his voice, even the fact that we fans missed him. they literally took advantage of that by being intentionally vague and dropping “hints” and “clues” for more desperate side of the fandom to interpret.

2) yet again, doesn’t mean the other members need to be pressured to continue, without them being able to mention his name ever again, without them being able to publicly express their grief. like even if Wonho was guilty of that whatever nonsense - does it mean his friends have to cancel him out of existence? does it really, really mean they have to pretend they are so busy now they can’t even stop to fucking breathe and reflect on what just happened? who are they protecting themselves from? who is that fuckwad clown who’s apparently genuinely offended that a group of idols admit they are sad to lose their best friend and hope that he’ll receive fair and just treatment in court? who is that person, does he/she even exist?????

3) also, starship was in trouble for other things during all this time. they were committing frauds and doing shady shit for months before and after Wonho got fired. convenient that it’s now Wonho who faces all that fire and feedback and makes it to the front page of newspapers, but starship gets to hide their own dirty laundry into tiny columns and mentions on the bottom of the page.

4) how about starship not letting Monsta X members to rest or recover after the shocking news, hospitalizing Jooheon in the process and making the members cry in public, all the while they have to still pretend absolutely nothing’s going on and they have always been a 6-member group and who is Wonho anyway? how about starship forcing them to participate in every fucking concert, event, tv show in a back-breaking speed, and intensifying that schedule every single week?

5) and have you like, NOTICED the drop of quality in all of their content? twotuckgom’s show looks hurried, blurry and messy. the “world” tour is basically just a north american tour that doesn’t even have a name and sells tickets with ridiculously expensive price tags. pretty much all their follow-related stuff was either not released at all, or got quickly replaced with poorly edited ot6 versions. their season’s greetings and fanclub recruit packages were downright shitty and  edited Wonho out in a way that was painfully ugly and obvious. the look of their english album was not just messy and unlike their normal quality, but also the promotions seemed tired, absent-minded and forced (a lot of the people who weren’t used to the style and quality of kpop probably didn’t notice a difference, though), and they were just dodging issues they actually wanted to talk about.

none of that needed to happen. starship quite literally did not have to keep going like they were doing an obstacle race. they didn’t have to make it so painfully obvious they were constantly tripping on their feet and stumbling over each other, pulling back stuff and then releasing it the next day, denying obvious things, ignoring our criticism & comments, punishing fans and being so clearly afraid of us, when all we did this entire time was we showed we weren’t satisfied with what happened to Wonho and that we still cared about him.

like. they could have waited and admitted that this was a blow they didn’t expect, and that they needed time to recover and make new plans. they could have easily admitted they wanted to figure out what was the truth in Wonho’s case, and then leave it at that. they could have easily let Wonho make a short statement, or the remaining members to say how they felt and then let them go on a hiatus for a while. they could have let us express our concerns and address them shortly. they didn’t have to release that english album so soon. they didn’t have to start selling the american tour tickets so early, especially right after Jooheon went on hiatus. they didn’t have to release that season’s greetings at all. they could have just. taken more time for themselves. absolutely nobody forced them to start running like fucking marathoners and steadily ruin every project they had planned ahead, as if that could have helped everybody to forget Wonho faster, and not, like, become angrier and more disappointed at starship instead.

and why do i think that’s important, why does that matter what they did when they showed they still sided with Wonho in the end?

well, because they were the ones who fired Wonho in the first place, when nothing forced them to. because they with 100% certainty did not expect Wonho to ever get his name cleared. that was obvious with how quickly they acted, kicking Wonho out of his dorm, not releasing content with his face or name on them and permanently banning fans from fancafes and events if they mentioned him once.

in short: they were shitting their pants and messing up a lot of the good stuff they had in mind, and then they placed that very public burden on the shoulders of the Monsta X members, forcing them to pull poker faces while they worked longer hours than ever before.

i’m still not okay with that, and i will never be.

if Wonho wants to come back, i’ll celebrate that. if the members genuinely want to continue their journey together under one of the shittiest companies in existence, i’ll support them.

but the day their contracts end?

hoo boy it’ll be the end of starship, even if it means i have to go tear their fancy ass new building down with my own two fucking hands.

[itsreallylaterightnow]

Itsreallylaterightnow Master List

AO3 Page: https://archiveofourown.org/users/itsreallylaterightnow/pseuds/itsreallylaterightnow

Order: Newest to Oldest

19. Love, Michelle 

Peter Parker and Michelle Jones have been friends since meeting at Midtown. Their relationship has had many up's and down's, the universe seemingly cursing them to never cross paths no matter how desperately the two want each other.

Or

The Love, Rosie AU that I didn't know I needed until I saw @seek-rest post about it

18. Irreplaceable You

Then she learned that she didn’t have to worry about that anymore. Because her story was going to end. She didn’t need to worry about what she was going to wear next, or her payments, or her assignments. It didn’t matter anymore because she was going to die. And she never knew that she was living her life for the next moment until she realized that the only moment, she was waiting for was her death. But the one thing that she would always worry about, was Peter Parker.

or

The Irreplaceable You AU that took over my life and is going to make me cry a whole lot

17. There's No Shelter From the Storm

With the Accords having fallen to pieces, Secretary Ross will do anything to take out enhanced individuals. Even if that means paying scientists to create a biological weapon carried by non-enhanced individuals that only effects those with mutated genes. Tony pulls Peter out of school, quarantining him into the tower, but how hard is it going to be to keep a teenaged ball of energy from getting himself infected?

or

Peter Parker is really bad at quarantining himself when there are still people that need Spider-Man's help and Secretary Ross sucks.

Author's Note: This is a fic obviously inspired by the crazy events happening outside our doors, but this fic is in no way meant to be insensitive to those affected. Stay home, stay safe. My prayers are with those infected, families who have loved ones infected, those who are quarantined with abusive families, first responders, medical professionals, and those who have lost jobs.

16. To Look Down Upon You is Enough For Me

“A wise man told me once that fathers weren’t always born to you. That-that sometimes the best fathers are the ones that step up to the plate when no one else is there. I didn’t truly know what having a father was like. But now I know what having a father should be. And I’ll miss him every day.”

-

Peter went on the mission thinking that he and Mr. Stark would be back in time for him to apologize to Michelle about being late for supper again.

He never would have imagined the outcome that happened, or how much it would affect who he was as a father.

15. Now All Our Memories (They're Haunted)

“I want to stay.” Peter stated indignantly, ignoring the blood that dripped from his nose, a waterfall of pain and dread. His head pounded like a river breaking on the shore over and over and over again. He could feel it. The energy that was racing through his bloodstream. His mind was a supernova. Flashes of lights and stars and images of things he had never seen – things he could never understand. Time warping around his consciousness, bending his thoughts into an everlasting loop. He felt the world at his finger-tips and he wanted it to go away. Like a black hole coming to wrap around him as he tried to claw his way back to the surface. Peter took a ground shattering breath – the earth’s plate shifting every time he inhaled. “I was going to be with you… forever.”

14. Let's Just Order Take Out From Now On?

Peter always knew that May's cooking was bad... he just never expected to almost die from it

or

Peter gets botulinum poisoning and stress ensues

13. Nothing is As it Has Been (and I Miss Your Face Like Hell)

Pete is grieving. And he just needed to say goodbye. Needed the chance to say goodbye. When he gets the oppurtunity, of course he won't pass it up.

or

The author is grieving and just really needed to live vicariously through a fic so she wrote this.

12. 5 Times Tony Got Peter Out + the One Time He Couldn't

Tony is always there for Peter. Always. But God, it can be exhausting when the kid has the worst self-preservation skills in the world. But, that's why he has Tony.

or

5 times Tony got Peter out + the one time he couldn't

11. My Bones Have Found A Place (To Lie Down & Sleep)

Prompt from Irondad-Fic-Recs on Tumblr: Prompt: So I just saw little women and I’m just thinking about the scene where one of the sisters dies. Like the older sister Jo, fall asleep by her bedside only to wake up to see her younger sister is gone. So how about peter and tony in this situation. Tony dozes off by Peter’s bedside while he’s hurt or sick and wakes up to find he passed away while was sleeping

:(

Why you got to hurt me like this? What if it’s like an IW AU where people die, and the body is left behind after Thanos snapped? and Peter clings on to life long enough to get back to earth and the compound where they hook him up to machines to try to save him (his heart is failing or something idk) but then that happens.

so basically that, just check it out.

10. It's Just Medicine 

Peter has an old injury that flares up once in a while, he thought for certain that he would be able to keep it a secret from Tony, until it flares in the middle of them testing out a new suit.

or

Tony Stark is a worried dad, and hates to see when Peter is in pain.

9. So Leave Me In The Cold (Wait Until The Snow Covers Me Up)

Peter has been missing for three weeks. Tony just needs to get his kid back. Just needs to hold him again.

Whatever it takes.

Or

Another rescue fic because we could always use some protective Irondad

8. Run Into My Arms Again (walk with me into the light) - Febuwhump 

Tragedy strikes Peter Parker’s life again. He wasn’t ready for it, and he knows that he will never be the same, but after four months of college, he is beginning to think that he will learn to be whole again. He has his family; May and Happy, and the support of the Starks to help bring him happiness again.

Then, the unthinkable happens. When Peter finds himself in the clutches of someone that wants nothing but to see Tony Stark burn to the ground, how will he find the strength to hold on until help arrives? And will he be able to protect his newfound family in the process?

7. Sometimes I Feel Like I'm Being Pulled in So Many Directions

Peter knows he did poorly on his final, and he feels bad enough. Then May finds out. Peter doesn't know how to handle all the pressure of being a normal high-school teenager on top of trying to balance the responsibility that comes with being spider-man.

Thank fully he has Tony Stark and May Parker to keep him in check- and comfort the stressed teen along the way.

6. When I Was Older

Peter Parker never thought that something like this would be a problem, he always imagined with the spider-bite came a sort of overall health and wellness... well besides being shot at constantly. So when this terrible illness bites down on him suddenly, how will it effect the few days he has left?

or

Peter Parker contracts an illness that he has never heard of then learns that it has no known cure... will he lose his mind before getting the chance to say goodbye to the ones he loves?

5. Whumptober 2019

spooky season=whumpy season! Here is whumptober 2019 from the prompts I created on my Tumblr itsreallylaterightnow! Please enjoy!

WARNING: this is whumpy stuff- so violence, graphic violence is to be expected. There will be blood and injuries and sadness, but it should mostly have a happy ending to each chapter!

4. Diamond of the Day 

Peter couldn't let Mr. Stark die. He wouldn't let him die. He had lost Ben, he wouldn't stand by and not do anything.

Or

The Avengers Endgame/Merlin crossover that no one asked for and made me sad

3. Saturn

Penny Parker lost May a year ago, and as she is coping with what happened, her life just seems to be one trial at a time. Within seconds her life changes forever. Will the knowledge that she still has a family, not by blood but by love, be enough to get her through the challenges that come her way?

or

Penny lives in the tower with the Avengers, but Ross has a plan for revenge. He knows that Tony would never show fear or pain, but in order to hurt Tony Stark, you hurt what he cares about. (I suck at summaries I'm so sorry)

2. Tumblr Drabble/One Shots

Archives from my tumblr - itsreallylaterightnow

Remember that I take requests over there! If it’s irondad whump/fluff odds of me accepting it are like... %100!!! Love you all!

Enjoy the fluffy whumpy goodness :)

1. Use Somebody

Peter Parker lives the average life... school, being an intern to the biggest company like-ever and fighting criminals while wearing spandex. Who knew that being close to Tony Stark would hold such deadly consequences

[alextriestowritestuff]

Elite S3 reactions (Episode by episode/overall thoughts +SPOILERSSSS)

So I know I post writing stuff but I have *EMOTIONS* about this show and no one to share them with so please ignore this post, if you don’t watch the show/don’t care. Includes spoilers so you’ve been warned.

Ok, I’m going to go episode by episode then do my overall feelings. I’d love to know anyone’s thoughts about the show so feel free to reblog! I just watched the show in 10 hours straight but alot goes on so I might not be able to remember every single conversation in a episode. Multiple characters have a lot going on at once. For reference, I don’t speak Spanish-I watch the show with English subtitles. 

-3x1: Carla

-Pretty solid start, we pick up a couple weeks after we left off. I felt so DUCKING bad for Carla the entire season and I understood why she lied in court about accusing Polo. Malick is introduced-am I the only who doesn’t like people who are persistent in asking other people out? Like my no is a no. Don’t annoy me, this is the kind shit people pull and pressure others into a relationship. It’s not endearing to me. So I automatically didn’t like him. 

-Lu gets kicked out but can someone tell me where she lives throughout the season? I figured she lived with her mom after her dad kicked her out but at the last episode, in the airport, she says both her parents have disowned her? Where has been living? Maybe she saved up money unlike Valerio idk. 

-3x2: Samuel and Guzman

-Samu is trying to get Carla back. I didn’t dislike them as a couple last season but I knew they were using each other, so I didn’t allow myself to get too close to them. But now I ship them. I wanted them together this season. Yeray is introduced-um, I still think he’s irrelevant. I did think for a moment that he was going to hold his money over Carla’s head so she’d stay with him but he didn’t even think for one second that was why Carla was trying to get with him (because her asshole dad pimped her out ugh) . He was only helpful when it came to the contract at the end.

-Deadass, I was going to exit out if Valerio had slept with Rebe’s mom. I thought that entire scene was pretty much sexual assault and it was creepy. He needs to go to rehab lmao.

-Polo trusting Guzman again was a dumb bitch move. So here’s how I feel about Polo. V unfortunately, I love him. He’s one of my fav characters. I know he’s a killer but Idk I think it’s the actor or something because he’s so pretty (the entire cast is beautiful) that I forgive everything he does?? Also I hated Marina by the end of S1 so he did me a favor. What I wanted from Polo was to embrace the fact that he was the villain. Like the times he threatened Lu by taking away the scholarship or (tried) to threaten Samu. Those scenes I was like hell fucking yes, no more wallowing. But noo this boy wanted forgiveness. Dude. You’re cute but you still killed someone, jesus. I would be so ashamed/guilty to be hanging out with the brother of the person I killed. He played himself there big time. The tweets were interesting way of revenge and ofc Caye used that to her advantage. She’s a leech but I thought she used the fact that she had the murder weapon (as leverage for Polo to stay with her) waaay more. 

3x3: Cayetana and Valerio

-Strange couple but eh, better than incest. So in this episode, Samu makes a deal with the worst detective ever (every season, she fails to solve a case lmao) and I don’t blame him. He’d do anything to get Nano back, it’s why he tried to get Polo arrested for an entire season. It’s shitty that he did that to Rebe but I understand why. Before this season, I thought Rebe was irrelevant because she wasn’t really fleshed out but after this season, I grew to like her a lot. It hurt watching her and Samu get close because everytime she said something like ‘you’re the only good thing in my life’ I was like girl, he’s the reason why you’ve lost everything ugh. It was uncomfy and sad to watch. 

-Ander and Omar. I liked them-didn’t like what Ander did last season but he did confess and was forgiven. So Omar’s whole cheating thing came out of left field and it wasn’t! Even! Properly! Confessed! to! Ander!!!! Oof. Ander SUFFERED this season. But I’m glad the writers chose cancer over HIV because there’s so much stigma attached to that disease and the LGBT community and I’m tired of that narrative. 

3x4: Lu

-I’ve always respected the hell out of Lu. Yes, she’s been a bitch for the past 2 seasons but she was always upfront about her actions. She didn’t like you, she let you know. This was her shining season and I loved her Valentine reversal. She looked hot, she really looked out for Nadia/Ander this episode (and the entire season). She could’ve revealed the cheating but she didn’t. I feel like S1 Lu would’ve so she’s come full circle. She said NO to Guzman which was everything. Oh speaking of which, I actually like Guzman. He’s really developed as a character in terms of temper. I like that he wanted to move on from hating Polo. But when he’s with Nadia, he irritates me. 

-I don’t have Muslim parents but I have Muslim cousins. My parents are immigrants. They’re not extreme like Nadia’s but like I feel Guzman goes out of his way to make Nadia’s home life worse. He’s knows her parents are conservative but he’s strides in the store and tells them about how their daughter can’t study. Should Nadia had said something? Yes but how could she? She has responsibilities to her parents. Her 2 other siblings have been kicked out. Nadia claims that her religion is important to her but Guzman repeatedly disrespects it. I couldn’t be with someone like that. It wasn’t cute that he offered to work so Nadia could study-which we saw him do ONCE. It’s overbearing. Also Nadia just forgives him so easily, it’s like dude, do you not care? So I like Guzman-he’s actually a good friend to Ander and formerly, Polo but my god, he’s so disrespectful when it comes to Nadia.

-Also I liked the threesome, not as good as Christian/Polo/Carla but not bad.

3x5: Ander

-Best episode this season, hands down. I loved the opening song and sequence. The scene where Polo’s parents catch him with Valerio and Caye really got my gears thinking-I was like if I were a parent (don’t want kids but ya know, if I did), how would I react to that? I’d like to think that I’d be very accepting of my kid (given they’re not hurting themselves or others) in terms of sexuality, religion, etc. But I was like hmmm, being polyamorous?? Not one I would be prepared for. But if the kid is happy, I guess. That was random but those were my thoughts. 

-Rebe finding out it was Samu who sold them out hurt like a bitch. BUT MY GOD THE BLACKLIGHT REVEAL!! Ugh the best. I had to pause, I was so shook. And Malick and Omar reveal to Nadia. Jesus. I loved her reaction but it was immediately undermined by the next episode when she forgives her brother. Like I get it, they’re siblings. But she should’ve held it against him longer. Omar got 0 consequences for cheating this season-not from Ander or Nadia. Tf.

3x6: Rebeca

-Carla is on drugs. Yikes. Again, her dad was pimping her all season so I get it girl. Also anyone else think the adults are stupid in the show?? All of their parents are business people but one bad financial move, they’re on their asses and almost bankrupt? Happened with Guzman’s dad and now Carla’s. Do they not invest in other things? Idk have a savings account?

-Also Samu and Guzman being friends. Top tier content. Chef’s kiss. Full circle and character development to the max. Ngl I felt a little bit of homoerotic tones there?? Just me?? I would ship them over any other couple if they got to together for just one night. 

-Nadia sharing the scholarship with Lu. Ugh. Everything. Loved that.

-Ander lying to Omar about having an affair. Ew. I know he was trying to push Omar away but like he was the one cheating? So either call him out on that or just break up with no reason. Don’t make yourself look bad dude. Ugh but the both of them sobbing at the end of their breakup...my heart shattered. That was GREAT acting. 

-Polo saving Carla. We all liked that. 

3x7: Nadia and Omar

-FUCK Ander’s mom for expelling them. I went to private school-there’s rules in place for parents who have money so they don’t manipulate the administration. Polo’s moms needed to let their son fight his own battles. Also Ander’s mom calling Guzman to come over to talk to Ander was really strange. She just expelled him. I know he’s Ander’s best friend but idk, she just expelled him. And they don’t even talk about it at Ander’s house. Again, this is the Guzman I like-the loyal/good friend. Loved the convo between him and Ander. 

-I liked Carla’s honesty to Yeryay and that they could possibly be friends. I always knew he idealized her for standing up for him on social media so I’m glad they acknowledged that. 

-Also Lu’s comment to Nadia that she looks like a pistachio was everything. And her ‘People are watching’ line in the previous episode is great too. 

-KEVIN FUCKING MCHALE made a cameo. Hell yes. And ofc, great speech by Nadia and Lu. Polito’s last conversations really did a lot for me to symphatize with his character (He didn’t have to do much because I still liked him despite his murdering). He got his moms to face the fact that they can’t throw money at every problem and that he is a killer. This scene and the beginning scenes of the next episode is what made me at peace with his character. I knew he was going to die but like this is what he needed for some sort of redemption. 

3x8: Polo

-Not the best ending for such a good season. But the first 15 minutes which are the convos and events that led up to Polo’s death was good. I never suspected Lu for a second, I really thought Valerio (Had some decent motive-more than Nadia, less obvious people like Samu and Guzman) had done it. But when I rewatched the trailer, you see that the writers told us it was her all along. Her line about the ELITE gang being family and that she’d protect them was a clue. She had the least interaction with Polo himself throughout the season so I never had time to even suspect her. Really brilliant. 

-Them touching the murder weapon is powerful. This was the only way to end things. I figured by episode 6ish that everyone was working together based on their answers in the flashforwards. And I half laughed because no sane police force would allow the witness/potential suspects to hang out together before interrogation. At least not without police watching them. 

-I do think it’s odd that Samu asked Rebe to ask her mom to get rid of Polo because he literally betrayed her and she talks to him (although mad) despite that. OKayyy. I really thought we were going to get the Samu and Carla get-together but guess not. I feel cheated by that because they clearly wanted each other all along. 

-The endings weren’t the best. I do appreciate that Omar made the right call in the end and I’m glad Ander is in remission. Oof my gripe though was with Nadia and Omar’s parents. So Lu goes to the airport and admits hey my parents disowned me and they’re like of course, we’ll be your family. AND I WAS LIKE ‘WHAT ABOUT OMAR??’ Y’all were so willing to kick him out and they never really made amends. So like I get that Omar’s dad is trying by acknowledge that Ander is Omar’s boyfriend but I mean during Omar’s mom’s dinner, he had no right asking him about his studies. He didn’t move out. Y’all kicked him out. How do you think he’s doing, trying to find a place to sleep? Jesus. Also the mom isn’t all good. Again, if I were a mom, I don’t understand how I could live without knowing if my kid is okay since they’re not living with me. My mom is a single mom-I know there’s no man in the world, not my dad, no one that she would chose me over. If my husband kicked my kids out, no questions, the husband is going to the curb or I’m going with my kids. Idgaf. The mom should’ve stood up. It just made me so angry that they were like poor Lu, no family but they mistreated their own child. 

OKAY so overall thoughts...I thought this was a really good season. I’d say 1st was the best, then this one, and then second (Ngl I don’t remember the 2nd one too much okay). I liked that it was more angsty and more character focused then the whodunnit? part that we’re used to. The entire cast has such strong acting and I’m going to miss whoever isn’t returning for S4. I’m going to miss Polo as well goddamn. 

Best moments of the season: Lu saying/doing ANYTHING-I have feelings, bitch. Her friendship with Nadia and other characters. Carla standing up to her pimp dad. Ander being in remission (his acting was great too). All of episode 5. Kevin McHale cameo. 

Worst moments: Polo asking Guzman if he would ever be forgiven?? And I know he did end up forgiving him but like bro, just because I don’t want to harbor hate for the rest of my life, doesn’t mean I forgive you for killing my sister whatttt. Omar never confessing to Ander about the cheating. Like no consequences and his character was just demolished this season. Still don’t know where Lu lived this entire season lmao. Anything Ander’s mom did to the students ugh.

Overall, I liked this season. It felt more mature for a high school TV show. I’m not super invested into any particular ship so I don’t feel cheated like most people. It takes me a while to get into ships but once I do, I get really invested. The only ship I was really disappointed in not seeing was Carmuel because Carla went through alot this season and Samu clearly wanted to be with her. And that’s all I had to say lmao.

[tempest-zephyr]

Well, I got an offer for a job. I’m not entirely excited about the position though since it’s contracted data entry position. It’s going to be monotonous, but I’ve had much worse jobs that have paid less. I’ve also had a better job that paid more, which was my seasonal job with the state DEP (although it was less than a dollar more, and it was only seasonal and not permanent.) My mixed feelings about working for the company is that it’s a multi-billion dollar pharmaceutical company. Yay, selling out to big pharma.

I know this doesn’t have to be forever, but was wishing to avoid being a part of a system that actively harms others. I was hoping to hear back from another municipal city for a job as a drinking water filtration operator, which would pay more and I’ve been studying and putting all this time in and paying for classes and testing and networking in the water field for was seems like the past year. Like I’m currently starting an online class with the Springfield Community college so I can be allowed to take the T2 exam (not so humble brag, but I don’t think I really need this class. However, it’s required to pass it to even take the T2 license exam, so I have to do it.) but this company came back quicker and I can’t just wait for a “what-if?” on that other position ( also I did a mediocre job during that interview, so Idk if I’d actually would be offer it anyways.) I didn’t even apply for this data entry position myself, some random recruiter came in out of nowhere and messaged me on LinkedIn about it.

During the interview the lady mentioned professional development opprotunities they have, which I hope can teach me more about stuff that isn’t just basic data entry. Like stuff that I can put on my resume, and maybe spin it like I’ve done data analyst things, which would at least be more valuable. At least I know they’re inclusive about diversity things since the interviewer mentioned groups in that company without me even prompting them. Doing this is really going toward the neoliberal route. I might as well vote for bootlicking buttigieg. #Blessed #GirlBoss #BossBabe  But I’m still feeling pretty damaged from that last job I got fired at and maybe I need some time to feel safe from all that. I never really went into it before, so I guess I’ll explain it now.

It was really rather unprofessional from their side. I was asked by two of coworkers how long I planned on staying here during the first month I was there, and I said maybe 3-4 years. I answered that because I’ve worked in a toxic work place before, and I knew I never wanted to do that again, ever. I didn’t want to commit to saying “I’ll be here forever. oh boy, I’ll buy a house here with a picket fence and start a family here” after only being there for less than 2 months. That’s like saying you’ll get married after only going on 2 dates. I thought being honest was a good thing, but no. Now I have trust issues. Apparently what I said was bad and my boss fired me after those coworkers told him. It seemed like he wanted someone there for like at least a dozen years. I didn’t even get to talk to him, he had the recruiter lay it on me after I drove home on a Friday. He said later in an email he went looking for me, but I know that’s a fat lie because I was at the office during that day. The recruiter was also rather unsavory with how she presented it. It really sounded like she was taking his side without even getting my side by saying like he felt “betrayed” because he was going to invest in my training. Which oh man, this is just the tip of the ice berg. I also felt uncomfortable saying I wanted to be there for forever because of the rather large work “culture” rift between me and the other guys. Like the first week, the 1st week, when I was shadowing with one guy, he was actively oogling some random lady from in the company vehicle; you know, the one with the huge company logo and their phone number on it. The lady clearly noticed him because she gave this scrunched frown and glared back, and all he said was “oops, forgot I wasn’t wearing my [sun]glasses.” They also called each other gay and fags to rib on each other. They at least didn’t call me that, but it’s just so juvenile, unprofessional, and it really made me feel not welcome at all. Even my supervisor called something gay offhandedly. When I confronted him about the other guys doing this, his response was a ridiculous  “boys will be boys, that’s just how guys who work in this field are” non-answer answer. He only apologized when I mentioned him doing it. I even heard them use a polack joke and also during the first week they were being peak boomer making millennial jokes, even though I’m pretty sure half of them are millennials or gen x. The recruiter also said my boss mentioned that I was “disrespectful of company property” referring to a tiny thing I did to one of the vans when I backed up to a chain-link fence with a plastic coating on it. It was just some easily buffed out plastic residue on the side of the van, and apparently, he had to tack that on as a reason. Like look do you see anything?!

There’s nothing there and I bet the reason they threw me under the bus was because they wanted a more legit sounding reason why they fired me listed on paper if they got audited. I don’t know why I got chastised for this when another guy literally shattered a back window of a van a week prior because he forgot to tie down the hand truck trolly. After this experience, I never want to work in anything related with blue-collar jobs again. I’ve been away from that job longer than I was even there, but hese past couple of months have been really shit because of this intense loss of trust for anybody. I was ready to beckon Nyx to come down an wipe humanity off the planet.

I’ve been feeling better over time, but I’m still not quite where I’d like to be. I don’t feel as hopeful about the future as I was before all this. Perhaps doing something different might help for now.

Edit: I wrote this last night and well, I called the water utility place, and they said they chose someone else, so at least that gives me a sense of closure and eliminates those what-if feelings, so I feel a bit more free to move on. They could have at least contacted back to tell me that themselves instead of me having to go after them.

[blog-in-a-corner]

Mystreet TES rewritten to fit the animated music video part 2

Hey what’s up gamers here’s the second part to my fic

Warning: i’m an idiot with the sense of humor of a banana

Aaron awoke to an unfamiliar room.

“This place…... it's….” Aaron muttered weakly.

“It's a shit hole” Aaron said.

And it was a shit hole.

“Oh you're finally fucking awake you sure took your sweet ass time” an unfamiliar woman said.

“Who the fuck are you supposed to be?” Aaron said.

“Your guardian angel uwu” the woman said.

“Oh so your like,my fairy godmother or some shit?” Aaron asked.

“What? No-where did you even get that from-ugh. Nevermind. Listen kid you gotta go back or else your gf is going to die” the woman said.

“Idk the rent back home is pretty damn high so I mean-” Aaron said.

“Bitch just go back to life if you don't want to get cucked by Zane” the woman said.

“Well shit Zane is the last person I would want to get cucked by. Fine I'll go” Aaron said.

“Alright then. My work here is done” the woman said.

“But you didn't do anything!” Aaron said

“Oh,didn't I?” the woman said.

“Yeah. You didn't” Aaron said.

“Oh. Well. See you in two seasons!” the woman said.

“WAIT WHAT AM I GOING TO DIE AGAIN-” Aaron said as the room began to fade.

Aaron….was coming back to….

“If he dies I take dibs on his car,it has seat warmers” said a voice so raspy it sounds like someone shoved sandpaper down their throat.

“I take dibs on his family inheritance!” said Emmalyn,or was it?

“No fair I wanted that!” said a voice that was trying too hard to be emo.

“Shut the fuck up you’re already rich” said the voice of a BTGGF(big tiddy goth gf).

“What the fuck is all of this about dibs?” Aaron said as he snapped wide awake.

“WHATTHEFUCK”

“HOLYSHIT”

“WHATINTHEFRESHHELL”

“FUCK”

Said the rest in unison.

“I-i'm alive!” Aaron said in shock.

“Dammit” Kim said.

“That's too bad” Lucinda said.

“How in the fuck did I wind up here? Last thing I remember is falling down a huge fucking cliff” Aaron said.

“Well after we found Zane he ran away because I was going to kick his ass but then he found your half dead corpse and Lucinda teleported us here and I accidentally dropped your head on one of the steps on the way up to your room” Garroth explained.

“Oh” Aaron said.

“Wait why the fuck is part of my shirt on my eyes?” Aaron asked.

“Your eyes looked cold so I put it on your eyes” Garroth said.

“How the fuck can someone's EYES look cold????” Aaron said.

“To be fair,you were half dead sooo” Lucinda said.

“Well I don't know about you guys but all of this fucking running and worrying and dying has gotten me hungry” Kim said,as she proceeded to tear off part of Garroth's hair and eat it like cotton candy. No one was bothered by this.

“Now that you bring it up I'm hungry too. I wonder if I still have any chicken nuggets left in my pocket” Aaron said rummaging through his pocket.

“I'm sorry you keep FUCKING CHICKEN NUGGETS IN YOUR PANTS POCKETS BECAUSE?” Zane yelled.

“And you don't???” Aaron said,as he pulled out of the picture of him and Aphmau from prom.

“Wait, Aphmau…..Ein…..Fuck! Aphmau I need to save her!” Aaron said as yote(past tense of “yeet”) from his bed.

“HEY MOTHERFUCKER WAIT HOW THE FUCK DID YOU EVEN SEE THE PHOTO THROUGH YOUR BANDANA?!” Garroth yelled.

“AND WHY ARE WE SUPPOSED TO BE WORRIED ABOUT APHMAU?!” Kim shouted.

“AARON YOU ASSHOLE I SPENT 30 MINUTES MAKING YOUR BED FOR YOU AND THIS IS HOW YOU REPAY ME?!” Zane screeched as he ran after Aaron.

“I'm not upset but you idiots need my help because plot conveniences!” Lucinda yelled after them. She breasted boobily to the stairs,and titted downwards.

“Anyway I'm off to raid Aaron's luggage and designate his entire will to myself”

“But what about Zane and the gas money-”

“FUCK I FORGOT ABOUT THAT LITTLE SHIT BRING A NINE IRON KIM” Garroth cut Kim mid sentence as they both ran out of the shit hole of a lodge they were in.

“Sweet,free entertainment.” Kim said as they ran.

We snap back to Aaron running in the forest, like a car commercial. Fierce. Sexy. Powerful. Free. After what felt like hours(actually just 30 minutes) Aaron found Ein and Aphmau.

“Aphmau! Ein!” Aaron yelled.

“Aaron!” Ein yelled.

“EIN!” Aaron yelled.

“AARON!” Ein yelled.

“Aphmau! :^]” Aphmau said.

“........”

“........”

“........”

“Okay Aphmau you just ruined the fucking mood just kill him” Ein said.

“Hmph. Fine” Aphmau pouted.

Aphmau raised her knife and lunged at Aaron.

“It's time…...fOR MY EXTRA ULTRA SUPER SPECIAL DOUBLE TWIRL ANIME JUMP STAB!” Aphmau yelled,as she attempted to extra ultra super special double twirl anime jump stab Aaron.

Aaron grabs her wrist and accidentally twists it and shatters all of the bones in her arm.

“Oops sorry fuck” Aaron said.

Aaron noticed something off about bae.

“your eye……” Aaron muttered.

“Wait when the FUCK did she get bruised!?” Ein said.

Read the contract babe.

“Oh. Fuck” Ein said.

“EIN!” Aaron yelled as he ran as fast as a Lockheed SR-71 Blackbird at top speed towards Ein.

“sHIT!” Ein screamed.

Aaron yeeted his entire body at Ein but Ein did a super Mario jump over Aaron but then Aaron used the entire force of his whole body to punch Ein into oblivion but Ein recovered and punched Aaron but broke his wrists in the process because he doesn't know how to punch then Aaron head butted Ein but he did it wrong so he hurt himself too and then Ein threw him into a tree and almost punched him again but in that moment Aaron unlocked ultra instinct and pushed him against a tree and de-evilized turned Ein into a human.

“NO NO NO NO YOU CAN'T DO THIS!” Ein screamed.

“Well my edgy anime backstory and murder eyes say I CAN” Aaron said as he left the forest.

“fUCK YOU SASUKE” Ein shouted after Aaron.

Aaron had completely left now.

“Fucking weeaboo”

“Well uh,I guess I'll go now? I was sort of expecting to die but I guess not. Plot convenience, you know how it is” Ein said as he walked away and into a Chick-fil-A.

“We've been running forever! Are we ever going to find Aaron?!” Kim said.

“Man I don't fucking know just keep running!” Lucinda said.

Finally,they had come across none other than Aphmau. Who else would it be, Brendan?

“Oh Aphmau! Why…...are you cosplaying Jasmine from Aladdin?” Zane asked.

“I AM NOT COSPLAYING JASMINE FROM ALADDIN ASSHOLE” Aphmau said in frustration.

“You and Aaron are into some weird fucking shit Aphmau” Garroth said in disgust.

“Grrrrr DIE!!!” Aphmau yelled as she attempted to extra ultra super special double twirl anime jump stab Garroth.

“Sweet! Another knife!” Garroth said as he totally ignored the fact that Aphmau was trying to kill him and grabbed the knife out of her hand.

“This is our chance!” Zane said.

Both Garroth and Zane grab Aphmau by the arms. Of course Kim and Lucinda do nothing but watch.

“ARGHHHHH I SWEAR TO FUCKING IRENE ONCE EIN GETS HERE AND FREES ME I'M GOING TO PUT YOUR HEADS SO FAR UP YOUR ASSES ALL OF YOU WILL BE SHITTING OUT YOUR MOUTH FOR WEEKS-”Aphmau’s screamed,as her voice slowly faded into the background.

“Um,a little help?!” Zane said.

“Nah we're good lol” Lucinda said.

“Ugh,useless!” Zane said.

“Don’t worry! I'm sure Aaron will be here soon” Garroth said.

“I sure fucking hope so” Zane said.

After 3 (three( whole hours because that's how long anime fights take, Aaron arrives to the scene.

“WELL YOU SURE TOOK YOUR SWEET ASS TIME” Zane yelled.

“Cut me some slack! I'm trying to make my death as sad and dramatic as possible!” Aaron said.

“Bold of you to assume your going to die permanently lmao” Lucinda said.

“Aaron,everyone knows you can't actually die. The least you can do is not make it at the inconvenience of everyone” Kim said.

“Ugh fine, release Aphmau” Aaron said.

Both Zane and Garroth release Aphmau at once. Aphmau proceeds to yeet herself at Aaron once more, picking up the knife she dropped on the ground in the process.

“WAIT YOU GUYS LEFT THE KNIFE ON THE GROUND?! WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU?!” Aaron yelled.

“OH CRAP MY KNIFE!!!” Garroth yelled.

Aphmau then stabs Aaron,but he pulls her closer.

“Aphmau…..” Aaron said.

“Hwo,,the fU,CK ArRE yuO,,r teEF gl,,OWI,Ng,,,” Aphmau asked.

“Nevermind that,i…..need to tell you something important……” Aaron said.

“Huh?”

”You…….”

“......smell like cheese dip”

Aaron then proceeded to take a whole hour to fall to the ground dramatically.

“AAAROOOOOON” Aphmau screams.

“Well I guess Aaron is dead :/” Lucinda said.

“Press F” Zane said.

“F”

“F”

“F”

“F”

“F”

“Anyways I don't know about you guys but I'm hungry” Kim said,as she tore yet another piece of Garroth's hair and ate it like cotton candy.

“Maybe Aaron still has some chicken nuggets left in his pockets” Garroth said.

“Let's just go to Taco Bell” Lucinda said.

“TACO I LOVE CHEESY GORDITA” Aphmau yelled in excitement.

“But,what about Aaron?” Zane asked.

“Don't worry he'll just come back to life he always does” Garroth replied.

And so our heroes went off to Taco Bell, blissfully unaware of the fact that Aaron didn't kill Ein.

“wait WHAT? WHAT THE FUCK DO YOU MEAN EIN ISNT FUCKING DEAD WHAT-” Aphmau said angrily.

Sorry that's all the time we have left bye.

End uwu

[wolfwhiteflowers]

ep 6-ish filming spoilers/spec. *twd comic spoilers

I rambled a lot. I also mentioned. SDCC news, Kang articles, Skybound(s9 promo pic) 

It’s a messy post. I wrote it like journal. vvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvv

There’s filming spoilers of Eugene up on the water tower and his foot got stuck..and I guess got outta there. Also maybe a lady there..the casted lady there. Alpha? ..a crew member? idk. He’s up in the water tower similar to comic-Gabe’s uh death. 

Well in the comics, Gabe went up there to look out for any signs of a herd during/ later-ish in the Whisperer war. He’s very new to being a solider and cowardly-like...like Eugene is but not tv-Gabe (oh, also tv-Gabe is partially blind too). So, comic-Gabe saw the huge ass heard coming, freaked out and went down the ladder, his foot got caught in bottom of the ladder. And then a whisperer killed him before Gabe could warn others about the herd and whisperers that are coming to ASZ. 

I’m gonna think it’s not a remixed of that scene. What about the radio (comic Eugene)? Idk anymore.

Ep 6 sounds like a big Eugene episode or he got a lot of outside action stuff in this ep.

-thoughts-I’m thinking of the moment they introduced Georgie in s8 which the lady is similar to Pamela from the Commonwealth. I’m starting to think that TWD writers shouldn’t introduced Georgie or someone that’s similar to this Commonwealth arc in s8. So Idk in s9 the spoilers sound like stuff all from after the time jump and Whisperer War arc. Everything seems rushed. Maybe they’re remixing these plots. Some plots in other seasons were there earlier than the comic storyline. Who knows. But if Eugene has a radio and contacting Stephanie. It’s like different from the comics. The radio plot from Eguene and going to Ohio to find Stephanie -Commonwealth -Michonne’s daughter, Elodie. It was all a mystery. So meeting Georgie ruins the mystery.

-JDM’s haircut! Dang idk anymore! Seems like a lot cast members got groomed lol So, another time-jump? 

-So I guess another Lintz kid will be in TWD or Matt will be teen-Henry! Maybe Henry won’t die(braces). I’m glad.. cos I think that’s important part of Carol’s story, imo.  But Idk for sure who he play as.

-ok so recently TSDF are saying that there will be a time jump based on what i just mentioned. 5 years or so jump based on Matt Lintz possible playing at teen-Henry. Matt is like 5 years older than his bro.

This timejump, I’m like NO. Blah I don’t like it. Is it in ep 6?

 Also ... based on the Skybound tweet, I don’t feel sure about TSDF, it seems like they’re rushing to announce a spoiler, again. I don’t think they got enough info yet..but yeah a lot of cast members are groomed..so I guess time jump is happening. I was like ok with it at first but ...later in the week, I noticed there’s no spoilers on characters grieving on Rick (leaving or dead) and no heads on pikes scene. Idk what’s going on storywise.

-(repeating the same thing) Skybound/TWD tweet. lol “don’t believe what u hear.” Idk what it is about but if it’s about the spoiler on the spoilery script pic, then ???? lol First, TSDF were saying WTF. They’re pretty sure Rick Dies in ep Five.

my comment on the thread.

I'm curious. Did you guys got more info or sources that Rick died in ep 5? Or you guys speculated over on the spoilery script pic?

What if Rick gone missing (like tv-Heath)? It's something that I kind of hope for in the show with AL wanting to leave. I was hoping Rick would go missing and then Michonne and Judith go on a boat to idk Commonwealth after s9.

We don't know much on why AL is leaving and why AMC is keeping a secret and all that. We just have to wait and see.

I hope you guys will get more info soon.

I mainly just want to know how Rick leaves the show. Does he die or go missing? And what about the Grimes fam.? And when?

I guess I was right? TSDF are saying some kind of craziness happening with Rick’s departure like a dumpster-gate. BUT, AL supposedly? got one episode left to film and the news is that he will exit TWD. So ...Rick is still leaving, right? :( I hope he doesn’t die. Back on rollercoaster ride..on hoping for the TWD AU to be good.

-I’m guessing Rick won’t even see this new windmill built. I don’t understand this windmill being built way later. Rick isn’t like “old man Rick” no cane, no windmill, blah.

-The time jump=

...well TSDF may be wrong about all this. Maybe Oceanside is dead or not focused anymore. Young Henry is missing like comic - Elodie or dead. New Lintz teen boy may be playing as a different character. Negan is groomed because from the comics he got groomed..so yeah. 

----if TSDF is right, ...

I get it now(Beth). I guess. Reason why s8 finale didn’t tease or set up for the timejump in s9 because it’s not the big time jump they wanna mention or tease about. Finale still sucked and didn’t excite me for next season. If ep 6 - time jump will happen (5 years) then I guess first 5 ish episodes are about Rick with a hair cut and yeah he’s gone. Maybe Gimple’s plan of s9 is in these 5 episodes and ep 6 is all Angela Kang’s ideas.

I’m so lost on the play of time. Maybe s9A is like FTWD’s recent half season. Idk. 9A goes half of the story is one year later and the other half is 5 years later. Or 1-5 episodes are one year later. 6-8 and on are five years later? Idk 

It’s really bad for Caryl. Idk much on storywise and filming spoilers, but I don’t think whisperers/Alpha does their thing before ep 6. So after the ep 6./5 years time jump, that means Carol ...I guess is in a romantic relationship with Zeke  in Kingdom for 5 or so years. Daryl still single cos wtf idk.. writers don’t say he’s asexual, gay, or whatever from the start. 

Like we already know but yeah really bad for Grimes family. They don’t show characters grieving over him? Michonne ofc is gonna be sad and wtf alone(?) for 5 years. Depressing. ehhh s9 is such crap for Michonne’s story. If Rick doesn’t die but gone missing or taken into the helicopter, then it reminds me of the soapy show Jane the Virgin (spoilers!!!........) where Michael “dies” and a year later he came back fine but had lost his memories and that’s why he didn’t come back earlier. Anyways, with that theory, it still wouldn’t work well with that 5 year time jump (and more). Like if maybe Michonne and Judith went a boat and found Rick after 6 years. That’s nice...? Depressing tho...uh? Then the end for TWD? lol

-5 years is a lot. TWD s1-8 was like 2 years. So...everyone and everything is so different.

---

omg those articles from Kang. sorry but she’s just being like any other showrunner trying to sell her show yada yada. Daryl will have romance? she’s like sure. But remember skybound said nope on s9.  Girl power?She’s like yas.  Skybound said nothing much new with Michonne and Carol. Ofc, it’s not gonna be good plots for the ladies./ It’s all depressing and idk the show doesn’t show them interact anyways.

WTF 

-... when AL finished his filming, I was like uh what to look forward to in the spoilers? sigh. yeah. It’s what it is. S9 is just awful. :\

-I don’t know what Carol is gonna do. MMB is a ninja, people can’t spot her during filming. It’s sad..I don’t know (s9)Carol anymore actually. I wish Carol was single and just idk. I want to know what Carol is like after the war and living in Kingdom (and why live there or show Carol telling TF that’s she’s living there and they still bond with her.) I don’t what Carol is like after 5 years either. I don’t know anything about Carol rn. ...I don’t think there’s much on Carol with Rick/TF. :(

---

SDCC.

ok but first, omg i just wanna see the cast interactions only. I love this lil group. (they’re like my ‘twd players’ and also it’s shippy like. Caryl, Richonne...and used to be-Gleggie)They’re main cast members and they’re like originals of the show plus JDM. But questions and answers..oh boy it’s gonna be awkward and crazy. 

eta. I heard that LC won’t be at the TWD panel. Maybe she will be at the con somewhere else? I’m not sure and it’s probably from her contract with ABC. Anyways, that’s sad...TWD fans won’t see LC at the panel for the last time.

 I realized that we’re gonna learn a lot about s9. Like confirmation on what’s gonna happen in the story. It’s gonna be crazy. They may be like Caryl is always just friends.duuuuh.durrrr.  TWD is not Rick’s story. durrr. Maybe, Rick (and Maggie) isn’t gonna diiiiiee ;) ep 5, he dies. SIGH.

I heard AL is gonna announce that’s he’s leaving the show. That’s nice, imo. I like to know if the actor will leave or not that kind of stuff. I don’t want this big surprise death or whatever.  Idk. whatever AL  want to or will do. I just want writers/AMC to treat their fans with respect. 

-------------------------

So um ..I just feel that s9 is actually crappy. It’s all AU to me in the first place, and that even as AU-onscreen, it still sucks. :\ So yeah give me fanarts and fic pls.

 I hope the actors and others have fun at SDCC. I hope s9 isn’t that bad but well I don’t think so. (not planning to watch it either so.) 

I’m still waiting what s9A will be like and does Rick dies or not.