#and the show is relying on its body
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I thought I would be able to watch anything with ohm in it, coz he always clicks with his costar
Sadly the new BL was too much for me, the other lead just wasn't putting in anything while the whole cast was trying their best
Also the story was so boring, where were the writers and why did they write is mess
I watched all of Battle of the Writers without understanding one part of that plot, but did I care?
No! Because in this life, I can simply enjoy something solely for the aesthetics and the aesthetics alone.
And Kidnap is giving me visuals!
It's giving me looks!
And it's giving me vibes!
And sometimes, we just don't vibe with something which seems to be the case with you. I understand since I didn't vibe with Bad Buddy, but I did vibe with Ohm looking like a five-course meal.
Which is what I think Kidnap was banking on - - - my thirst. Because in the first two minutes of the first episode, Ohm was shirtless, dehydrated, and looking like a snack.
Delicious enough to eat up like honey and butter on a warm tortilla.
Then in the second episode, Leng was taking off his shirt too.
This show put two attractive boys in sleeveless shirts for a majority of the series and tied them up together because the show knows what most of us showed up for.
AESTHETICS!
So I get your issues with the show, but what it's lacking in substance, it's more than making up for in the looks.
I'm not here for the show. I'm here for a show.
And it's delivering.
#kidnap the series#everyone is pretty#and the show is relying on its body#which is fine by me!#we need more beautiful things in life#it's a vibe#it's an aesthetic
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blocking so many people tonight because how the hell do you post this without an ounce of self shame? 'there are people out there who are just as scared as you are' are you including the people your candidate has funded a genocide against? are you including the people Israel targets and opresses with the US regularly funding its crimes against humanity? the people who cant just go have a snack and talk to their friends because they watch their friends be murdered and theyre facing starvation? are you including the people you called the genocide of as a necessary sacrifice and something thats a 'lesser evil'? do you take into account their fear and trauma for a year of nonstop bombings, drones, missiles, shootings, invasions, etc?
'the world is going to be tense' its already fucking tense, you people just dont give a shit about anyone that isnt white or cant play into your ultimate victim complex to excuse your eager participation in genocide. you cant call for people to just 'survive' when you helped put a heavy asterisk next to who exactly expected to stay living if your war criminal wins.
[GO DONATE TO DOCTOR MOATH]
#also already seen so many people fucking sprouting out their manifest destiny bullshit without second thought over red states#without acknowledgement of the largely Black population in the deep south and the queer people that live in these areas#because it was never about protecting POC or queer people. it was about protecting their comfort in being able to ignore the people in thes#states that they say tarnish and impose dangers against the 'greater populace'#(because the rest of this country is soooo great and admirable and safe for marginalized communities of course.)#like i always think of how white and democratic populations support for BLM was LOWER than before george floyd's murder only a year later#liberals rely on POC (especially Black people) to vote blue and if a state is red theyre the first to be blamed#and then told they deserve the ongoing oppression and targeted abuse they face for not 'showing up'#you use their life and the fact theyre opressed to advocate for a 'lesser evil' and that their lives are at risk#and when Black or Palestinian or Asian or Indigenous or Hispanic or any other POC group tells you theyre still being fucking opressed#you call them psyops or that they'll be to blame if ppl dont vote blue because they 'complained' or wasnt compliant in you using their live#as a political tool. you scream protect trans bodies for a candidate that made no promises to provide protection#and you blame queer people in red states for staying there and that theyre willing victims#you call a genocide a lesser evil. you looked at it and DEFENDED the funding of it saying at least its not 'cheeto man' paying billions#for the murder and terrorism against Arab communities and countries.#there was mass surveillance against Palestinians here. theres border walls and sieges and torture here.#youre a colonizer and supporter of imperialism while using progressive language and softening the role you participated in in advocating fo#an administration thats currently commiting genocide and ongoing colonization#youre fucking tense while sitting in bed with a thumb up your ass because the opressor you supported might lose.#you havent even waited for results to blame and harass the communities and people in areas that mostly have targets on their back#regardless of who's the president or not#you dont care about anyone but saving your own damn back and youre willing to turn it against other opressed people#the second youre given a chance.
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thinking 'bout how the lads interact with what the bracelets represent, especially in their decks
#marwospeaking#Yuuya is by far hardest to work with on this because he Varies. but that might just be him being opposite to Yuzu so it might count?#anyway Yuuya is a bushfire made by fireworks set off without proper precaution (the improperly set off fireworks being Zarc..#.. being influenced into the position that made the lads through his desire to both destroy and entertain his crowds)#It's small sometimes. but in the right conditions is an unstoppable conflagration#Yuuto literally does not die. In a world where we never truly get the other two (Yuugo and Yuuri) interacting with their host (Yuuya)..#.. outside of duels. he very much does. He is undead in a way the others don't quite match (pre Zarc revival) and it's opposite to..#.. En Bird's life (assuming it counts death too as part of its cycle)#Yuugo uses machine monsters - things that distinctly don't breathe. and in most cases have exhaust pipes billowing fumes#and machines can be warm to the touch at times. which you could feasibly slide against Rin's Windwitches for being Very Cold Ladies#Also he's trapped no matter where he is. Neo Domino has a stronger grip on him as a person than anyone else. and when he might finally..#.. escape that. he's trapped in someone else's body with no canonical recourse. because the story ended on Yuuya's terms and no one elses#Yuuri is hardest to place but I think he's very stationary. Sere's monsters are dancers - constantly moving - and she's very able to#adapt as she goes despite how stupid she can be book-wise. Yuuri is rooted into his role. even when he discards his loyalty his role was..#.. always in Zarc's interest no matter if he knew or not. The Professor's loyalty from him is an add-on to that#... I'd argue Zarc cared more about his pieces than Ray cared about hers also? He made cards for them on the fly so they'd Win#Even in moments where that victory is not in a wholly positive light - Odd-Eyes Raging and Gatlinghoul - but we know he's capable of it..#.. a la allowing Yuuya to debut pendulum monsters on his behalf in order to win against Ishijima#something something this can then apply to the other lads. they never lose except to each other and Ray's girls (at least on screen)#Yuuto survived 3 years of war. even despite Yuugo and Yuuri showing up. so methinks Zarc must've had a role in helping him survive#Like. Zarc's distinctly present for his Lads. Ray's not present for her lasses until one of them speaks through her#Sure it's very possible that's a bracelet thing - they are floodgates at the end of the day - and not a Ray thing. but it also wouldn't..#.. surprise me given Ray is an Akaba. we know they will sacrifice others for a gain later on - Ray's was sacrificing a whole world to make.#.. a safer one for everyone to live in. irrelevant on if they remember it or if they never existed originally. Except Leo Akaba. He does#(with memory reading tech) and it tortures him the whole time. she didn't mean to hurt him but Still#Zarc's distinctly not better than Ray - he's still broken wide open when it comes to his hatred of humanity (but not his human half)#and it resulted in multiple near-deaths the second time around - but I can't say Ray's that much better if it turns out the bracelets..#.. weren't floodgating her ability to help her lasses#Completely unrelated but. I don't like what Arcray represents ngl. makes it seem like Zarc could never move on with the help of his lads#and has to rely on someone who killed him and sent him to purgatory about it in order to heal.
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I never claimed to be the responsible one in this body *takes a sip of whiskey on a completely empty stomach, having last eaten 11 hours ago and it only being half a bag of chips, no breakfast to speak of*
#look i dont think i was the one that fucked up breakfast but come on#who the hell looks away from food in this adhd ass body?#we all know if we dont immediately dig in we'll forget it exists and it'll get gross#so no breakfast and all i could manage to handle was the chips and nothing else sooooo#nothing went to plan today our life is in shambles#we should never rely on other people to do fucking anything and we should never plan around them either#didnt do chores didnt eat its a fucking miracle we took our meds#im gonna fucking drink and we're gonna TRY to not be snappish at our mum for not at least notifying us that the plans were cancelled#cant entirely blame her shes showing signs of VERY early stages of dementia. her memory isnt gonna last forever#and she doesnt have the coping mechanisms we have with our memory issues because shes used to having a reliable memory to fall back on#it'll take time for her to adjust to her brain being unreliable like this and it'll take longer than it took for us#amnesia from childhood is VERY different from amnesia appearing late into adulthood ('late' shes 41)#its gotta be weird and probably very upsetting#we were a little confused about it at first when she took our reminders as insults#if youre new to memory struggles reminders are helpful right? wrong. its not about practicality its about being deemed as unreliable#even if its true in a completely objective sense#whatever we know theres times where we wont completely understand what shes dealing with - different experiences and all that#the tism on our end doesnt help#we just cant tell when reminders are welcome so we dont give them at all anymore#even when it fucks us over - like today! ☆#gods we're tired
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So along with ToaM I have two wips that I'm working on. The first is basically easy because its more after the After rather than During which gives me heaps of creative freedom.
The second one though is really annoying me so I've been searching and I've realised that fundamentally the way I read a lot of Spiderman fics and particularly the way I see Peter & Tony fics written, tend to fall into an area i consider to be overly invasive and creepy (and thats not even considering both the age dynamic, the power dynamic of Tony being significantly more famous and higher on the socioeconomic ladder)
but at the same time, I don't want to portray Tony as a predator who takes advantage of a young teenager and blackmails them into lying about the true nature of their relationship and taking advantage of the fact that this young teenager clearly idolises them and would walk off the face of the earth for them.
Added context is important when we discuss these subject matters and it's definitely something I'm thinking of every time I work of ToaM (since Harry is 11rn and a vulnerable person) but theres also a point where added context leads to jumping to conclusions or even not seeing the whole picture.
I feel as though I work a lot with self reflection and what the characters are seeing verses that they are saying. I've never been good at 'Show Don't Tell' as a result. I'm also aware that the way I write probably shows a lack of being able to connect with my readers or hold a line of conversation. (although I blame the tism on that one)
So (although i doubt anyone would read this anyhow) whats your opinion of the way Peter and Tonys relationship is handled by the fandom? Are there any aspects of their relationship (or arguably lack thereof) that you would like me to experiment with.
#I see a lot of things were Tony monitor Peters heartbeat and records all of his time in the suit#then records all of his data and tracks his location#and while i don't necessarily disagree with a location tracker or even a device that records what Peter is seeing#I don't think that info should be in Tonys hands. Its very much so data that Peter needs to be in control of#it just comes across as very untrusting and invasive for one man in a position of power to be in control of#Peter needs to be able to work on his one#relying on the fact that he has a crutch he can use if he genuinely feels as though he needs it#but it should be up to him to make that call not his heartbeat going fast for 20seconds not his body temp changing rapidly#Tony having full access to Peters body when he's in the suit creates a power dynamic where Tony has full access to Peter#but Peter has no access to support or training from Tony#mind you the only time Tony shows up in homecoming is to tell Peter he can't handle it#SO WHAT YOU ARE HIS MENTOR TELL HIM WHAT HES DOING WRONG AND HOW TO FIX IT#Tough Love rarely helps and in Peters case he had to feel totally alone and basically give up on Tony until he was able to move forward
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! 𝐖𝐀𝐍𝐓 𝐘𝐎𝐔 𝐓𝐎 𝐖𝐀𝐍𝐓 𝐌𝐄 𝐟𝐭. 𝐠𝐨𝐣𝐨
ALPHA! GOJO x F OMEGA! READER
+ synopsis. you live in a world where omega and alpha qualities are medically treated at birth to become dormant later in life. present day, only betas & pseudo-betas exist, pheromones & its effects are left in the distant past, and heats & ruts are reduced to monthly cycles of being slightly hornier than normal, nothing more.
so, what happens when a curse you encounter induces a heat in you far worse than anything recorded in modern times?
+ alternatively. in which even a special grade sorcerer isn’t immune to the curse-induced heat of an omega — you, the partner he's pined for over the course of your entire friendship — forcing you and him to go back to your primal roots.
+ cw. forced A/B/O dynamics, lovesick! gojo, slight! geto x reader, sorcerer! reader, dubcon (technically sex pollen), reader is born an omega, gojo and geto are born alphas, gojo's infinity can't block scent for fic purposes, geto doesn’t turn au, use of restraints, mating call, mutual pining, it gets playful / lighthearted in the middle, implied 'medical' use of sex toys, dirty thoughts, lordosis, petnames (angel, love), pussy job, constant pov switches towards the end, cunnilingus, ass fingering, piv, cervix kisses, confessions, shared orgasm, creampie, knotting, no beta bye, 3.5k+ words, MDNI
+ masterlists. general ┆ jujutsu kaisen ┆ collab
♥︎ aki’s note. big thank you to raven (@raven-cincaide) for sprinting with me ♡ ++ this very late fic is part of my into the omegaverse collab ♡ please show some love to everybody’s amazing works when you can!
He came as soon as he heard. Plagued by his racing thoughts, Satoru stands still, chewing on the inside of his cheek as he watches you from behind the glass window. Though he appears to be calm, seeing you like this is torture.
“How long has she been in there?” Suguru puts his hands in his pockets, taking the spot next to Satoru.
“Too long,” he breathes. And it’s only been half a day. His 6 eyes have been agonizingly locked on your form the entire time, piercing blue eyes peering through the glass and into your poor disturbed soul. You’ve been crying non stop ever since they found you. Eyes glossy, pupils blasted, spewing incoherent words, skin damp and hot.
They needed to restrain your arms and legs to be able to perform tests on you, but that didn’t stop you from crossing your knees, relying on friction to rub your pussy as best as you can. All this, as your body wriggles beneath the harsh clinic lights. You’ve gone absolutely feral. Your cries are pitched an octave higher than what Satoru’s used to. And as much as he doesn’t want to believe it, it’s as if… “It’s as if she’s calling out to someone.”
“To you, you mean?” Suguru scoffs.
Paper seals secure the walls of your room. Remnants of the curse linger around your body and because of that, they’ve deemed it safer to assume only born-betas are allowed direct contact. For now, at least. Shoko says they don’t know if there are aftereffects �� meaning, if exposure to a victim could also trigger a rut in an alpha. And now they’re dealing with pheromones, not just cursed energy, so infinity is out of the question. That means Shoko gets to stay with you, and the two born-alphas are to stay on this side until further notice.
Satoru hates it – being separated from you by a wall like this. Not like you weren’t already normally separated by one, considering your room in the dorms is right next to his. But he particularly hates how this renders him unable to barge in on you any time he wants.
Right now, he wants to annoy you. He wants to poke fun at you. He wants to pull your strings because he likes it when you get fake-mad. You’re cute when you do that. Plus, he uses it to his advantage knowing you can never actually stay mad at him for too long — a weakness the two of you share.
“Heard the report got it all wrong.” Suguru pats Satoru’s back. “Special grade 1, was it? Quite the leap from semi-grade 1.” Suguru shakes his head, chuckling in disbelief. He’s never seen his best friend so distraught. But Suguru reassures him, telling him not to worry and reminding him of the fact that, at the very least, “She’s alive and kicking. Well, kicking too hard for that matter. Those knots are gonna bruise.”
“She should’ve called me. Fucking idiot.” Satoru clicks his tongue.
They have brought in experts — historians, even. They have tried every omega medicine known to man. Emergency suppressants that were once obsolete are concocted that same day. Everything should’ve shown immediate effects. And yet, it’s almost laughable how it all seemed like they were only giving you placebo meds, forcing you to down so many in so little time. Since nothing has worked, Shoko sent them away.
What’s worse is, the curse is exorcised. And in the world of Jujutsu Sorcery, killing a curse usually takes all its enchantments with it. So, if the curse is dead and you’re still experiencing the worst heat known to man, they could damn well consider your revert permanent if they don’t do something about it quickly.
The two men jolt back upon smelling a very pronounced aroma of burnt cinnamon on Shoko who’s left the room for the first time in the last 6 hours. Her hair is slightly disheveled, slightly damp from sweat. And the circles around her eyes have grown visibly darker and heavier.
“Can’t imagine our forefathers going nuts over that stench.” Suguru lightens the mood, fanning his hand in front of his face. He blinks his tears dry as a result of inhaling a whiff of the strong odor.
“It’s not that bad.” Satoru scrunches his nose as he’s suddenly taken aback, though he’s not particularly repulsed by the scent. If anything, he’s immediately convinced it’s something he doesn’t mind living with. “Plus, I heard it’s slightly different for every omega.”
“Finally, some fresh fucking air,” Shoko murmurs as she leans on the glass, head thrown back as she lights up a cigarette. Apparently, she hasn’t had one since they brought you in. “Welp, tried everything. Even left her alone with toys to do—”
“Herself?” Suguru teases.
Satoru scratches his throat. “Did it- uhm… did it help?”
“Not one bit.”
“Maybe you… didn’t give her enough time?” Satoru nonchalantly suggests, pouting as he subconsciously takes notes for himself if he ever gets presented with the opportunity.
“I let her at it for an hour.” Shoko huffs out smoke in the direction opposite to the two men. “I even gave her… options, you know.”
Satoru mentally kicks himself as his thoughts run wild. He can still see the tip of the pink silicone popping out of one of the trays, girth not so different from his. He hates Shoko for doing a shitty job at concealing it because blood rushes to his cock just by looking at that thing, knowing it had gone inside you. He thinks about what other toys Shoko had you use — thinks about which one was able to make you cum the fastest, which one was your favorite?
Fuck. Now, he has to keep adjusting his stance, marching in place like a damn soldier till he manages to get his half-hard cock into a better position in his pants. Using his hands then and there is not an option for obvious reasons.
“Satoru.” Shoko’s tone becomes more serious. “You can drag this longer than it needs to be. But you know there’s only one surefire tried-and-tested-literally-by-millions-way to cure a heat.” She takes a long puff, blowing smoke in between words, embers flickering on the end of her half-done stick. “You up for it?”
“Don’t be stupid.” Of course he is.
Suguru and Shoko shoot each other knowing glances, the former raising an eyebrow as if to say ‘watch this’. “Satoru, If you’re not gonna do it, I wi—”
“I’ll fucking kill you,” Satoru spits, not letting his best friend finish his sentence. The two quickly exchange low fives, chuckling at the expense of their lovesick friend. Satoru turns to Shoko, paying no mind to his friends so blatantly enjoying themselves in the middle of a crisis. “You’re sure you’ve done everything you can?”
“Everything I can, yes. You’ve exhausted all the favors you can ask of me, it’s high time you deal with your own problems.” Shoko prods two fingers onto Satoru’s chest.
“Want her to want it,” Satoru speaks softly.
“Are you blind? Did your fucking 6 eyes stop working?” Shoko looks at Satoru, puzzled, as if she wonders why Satoru isn’t seeing what she’s seeing. “Oh, I’m pretty sure she wants it bad.”
“Want her to want me.”
Shoko rolls her eyes and disposes of her cigarette though it’s a couple more puffs away from when she usually stops. She’s at her limit. “Wait here.”
Trying to prove a point, she goes to the supply room and comes back with two handkerchiefs — a white one and a blue one. She then pats the white one with the sweat off of Satoru’s nape, and the other with Suguru’s. “Pray with me, boys. One of you’s gonna have to return to their roots.” She cracks her neck, preparing to head back in.
The sound of your cries increase and decrease in volume when Shoko opens and closes the door behind her.
“Shoko, Shoko, please! Make it stop! Make it stop! Make it—”
Shoko waves the blue handkerchief above your head, grabbing your attention for only a few seconds till you’re back to screaming in agony. She can almost hear Suguru scoffing on the other side. She then takes out the white cloth with Satoru’s scent, and like a moth to a flame, you’re instantly drawn to it. Your breaths have finally steadied. You take quick bouts of whiffs, head craning every which way she drags the piece of cloth.
She leaves you with the handkerchief after letting your arms and legs loose, allowing you to curl up in a ball as you desperately inhale Satoru’s scent. It’s the first thing that has calmed you in hours. Nonetheless, this relief is temporary. Pretty soon you’ll be needing something stronger. Something more potent. Something in its rawest form.
“S-satoru,” you breathe through the handkerchief, staring at the two-way mirror like a faint prayer to the god you know is there. “Shoko, please get me Satoru.” Your words are clear as day, and that’s the first coherent thing you’ve said all day.
Shoko’s eyes dart to where she’s sure Satoru stands. “Do you see it now?” she mouths.
Satoru’s jaw stiffens, stomach now a mangled mess of anticipation and guilt. On the one hand, he’s relieved. He’s not sure what he would’ve done if you’d reacted the same way to Suguru’s scent. On the other hand, he knows what’s going to happen now. Not like he didn’t see this coming.
…
Though she didn’t have to, Shoko chose to make a nest of Satoru’s clothes for you in his own bed. “Thought I’d at least make the effort to help make it romantic, no?”
Except nothing about this is romantic. Jujutsu dorm walls thankfully aren’t thin, but thin enough for him to hear your cries from behind his door.
Satoru takes a second to collect himself, getting square with the fact that this isn’t how he wanted your first time to go. He can smell you from where he stands, forcibly reminding him for every second he delays that you’re in there, waiting for him.
He’s played your first time over and over in his head as he fucked his fist — almost every morning in the shower, once or twice in your room when you were out on a mission, and many, many times in the very bed you’re nestled now. Out of the hundreds of scenarios he’s made up of him making love to you in his head, he’s never once pictured this.
His friends have pestered him about this for so long, urging him to take the first step or else Suguru — and on some occasions, Shoko — won’t hesitate to whisk you off your feet. But he tells them he has his reasons for constantly holding off. He says it’s because you’re perfect for him, and so he wanted your first to be perfect — plain and simple. He says it so matter-of-factly, too. But now, to hell with the perfect scenario because as it turns out, it’s mother nature herself who decides to give him one crazy hell of a push to make a move.
Satoru enters his room. Greeted with the raw and unbound fragrance of your heat, his heart pounds in his chest. He coos upon seeing you hugging his pillow, all plump and ready for him. Suddenly, it registers in his head that he’s seeing you naked for the first time, lying in his bed. “God, you’re so beautiful,” he says more to himself, trying to convince himself that this is real — that you’re real.
“‘M sorry, it hurts— hurts so bad, Satoru. ‘M sorry!” He’s sorry it has to be like this, too. But he’s not so sorry that you’d asked for him.
With dried up tears along your cheeks, and fresh ones in your eyes, your cried out voice croaks, “Satoru, help me please. I need you.” You roll on your belly, propping your forearms as you bury your face in his scent, whining into his pillow, back arching + ass perked up, as you shamelessly stroke your pussy to his face. “N-need you now, please, please, please?”
Fuck.
Even now, it melts his heart seeing you so full of want.
“Shh, shh, shh. I’m here aren’t I?”
Satoru doesn’t miss the way your hand grips the sheets as you watch him discard his clothes. He sees the absolute delight in your face, the flexing of your belly, the further bend of your back, the quicker strokes of your fingers around your clit. But it’s the sight of your nectar dripping out of you that finally makes him break.
With how hard he is and how much he wants to devour you like crazy, he could easily be mistaken for an alpha in a rut. He swears his chemical makeup has nothing to do with it. He just wants you that bad.
Suddenly, the space between you and him doesn’t exist. You moan out loud just by being touched by him. He engulfs you in his arms forcing you to sit up, hot skin against even hotter skin, your back pressed flush against his torso as he buries his face in the crook of your neck. And your slick — god, your honeyed slick — begins to coat his hard cock speared between your legs and along your puffy folds.
Fuck.
“Sweet angel.” His eyes roll back as he takes in all of your scent.
His cock twitches between your legs, pre-cum starting to drip off his tip. He feels a tingling sensation in the pit of his stomach as soon as he gets into contact with your slick. Your touch is so fucking electric. One hand wraps around your stomach while the other reaches for your breast, cupping and kneading the soft flesh, feeling your thuds of a heartbeat beneath his palm. You smell so fucking good upclose, your scent keeps hooking and hooking him in, and taking care of you is all he cares about. That's all that matters. He’s holding you now and yet he’s unable to satiate this mad need to be closer to you. He needs to be closer. He needs to make love to you. Needs to be in you—
“S-Satoru.” You guide the hand on your breast, intertwining with his fingers, pressing harder, rougher, against your skin. “You feel so good, Satoru. Please move. N-need more.”
Satoru releases a deep groan in your ear when you bring your knees together, locking his cock between your legs as you begin to grind your pussy on his erection, nectar lubing your every sway.
“E-easy, eaaasy,” Satoru’s voice is low and breathy. He hisses with every roll of your hips, breath hitching as your pussy drags his foreskin back and forth, balls kissing the back of your thighs. Mind hazy with want, he presses his cheek on yours, planting open mouthed and sloppy kisses on the side of your face.
“Not so fast!” Satoru holds your hips in place when you start to pick up the pace, making you whine, “Wha–”
“Too fast, I’m sorry.” Satoru trails apologetic kisses along your jaw. “Not there- don’t want to cum there.”
He apologizes as a tinge of guilt prickles his throat seeing you so utterly vulnerable. Your eyes plead for him to fill you then and there but he needs this moment to last as long as possible, even if it means prolonging your agony.
“S-Satoru, can’t wait any longer!” You try to move your hips but they’re locked in place.
“No.” He says, firmly, and it hurts to tell you that. “Not yet.” Tears well up in your eyes as your chest heaved at the height of your confusion. Your mouth opens, trying to find words, but before you get to complain, he gives you a soft, chaste kiss — your very first one, he realizes — and tells you, “Get down for me.”
And with tears in your eyes, you oblige. He supposes this is the work of the reemergence of your makeup and raging hormones, making you so pliant and submissive, you’re willing to do his bidding even when you’re on the verge of insanity — when, before this, you always had a stubbornness in you he’d always been fond of. But then again, at this very moment, you’re desperate. And you’re desperate for him.
“Satoru, I don’t know what you’re up to b-but please, don’t take long- oh!” Your protests are quickly replaced with cries as you feel a soft, wet muscle slide across your folds. He’s always had that habit of not letting you finish. To think it’s something he takes to bed with him makes your stomach coil. “Fuck!”
Hot breath fans your folds as he splits your slit open with his tongue, and all you can do is shudder in place, wallowing in the extreme pleasure that dozens of toys weren’t able to give you. You’re practically leaking on his face, honey dripping down his chin, the tip of his nose pressing into your ass.
His tongue squelches with every lick, twisting your core in knots with every line drawn. And then it’s as if Satoru’s lips are sealed around your clit, puckering and sucking on the sensitive bud.
“Satoru, oh god. ‘Toru, so good, ‘s so fucking good~” Your eyebrows furrow, lips pursing as he relentlessly flicks his tongue on your clit.
“Oh!” You scream when a honeyed digit enters your ass, thumb hooking and pressing hard against your g-spot, all while his tongue remains fixated on your clit. “Fuck- mmm!”
You can’t help but mewl and cuss into your first orgasm — the first one he granted you, that is — wave of pleasure washing across your body as he eats out your high. And while it’s a sensation that gives you a sense of satisfaction, you’re left wanting more. You’re left needing more.
“Please fill me- can’t wait any longer- please, alpha~”
Oh, now you’ve done it.
“Sorry, love.” Satoru pulls you back into his chest and cups your cheek, making you look over your shoulder and into his face. “Neither can I.”
“Sato- Oh!” Gagged by the feeling of friction in your aching walls, the very first one you had welcomed since your heat, you’re at a loss for words when his cock enters you, bottoming out straight away. Your mouth forms an ‘o’ and he instinctively closes the gap, savoring your mouth, and with every click and swirl of your tongues, he thinks you are probably the softest, most delicate thing he’s ever tasted.
He knows he’s screwed, tasting you for the first time, knowing he’ll never want anything other than you, your lips, your pussy, this feeling ever again.
You feel as if every pump of his cock scratches that stubborn itch that’s spread across your pussy since your heat. And every satisfying ram of his hips kisses your cervix, bringing you closer and closer to your high, as if this — his cock, and the feeling of his body rocking your own — has been what’s missing in your life.
“Scream for me, angel,” Satoru grumbles against your ear as he feels himself nearing his own climax. Suddenly, his mouth is back on yours, kissing you, with you purring against his lips as he fucks you through your shared high.
“I–” When his pace comes to a full stop, you know what’s about to come. And he doesn’t know what to say. Shoko’s already briefed him on what’ll happen to an alpha who cums in an omega in heat, not that he doesn’t know what a knot is. He just doesn’t know what to expect. Still, he wants you to take it. Even now, he wants you to want it. But he studies that curious look on your face, and as he scrambles for words, it seems it’s your turn to finally shut him up.
“I love you, Satoru.”
Satoru chuckles. More to himself.
“I love you, too.” Satoru, with breaths uneven, relaxes his forehead against yours. Satoru steadies himself, and pretty soon, you collapse in his arms as his knot locks in your core.
...
"Hey," Satoru breaks the silence. "You know... taking my knot like that means you practically asked me to marry you."
"Shut up."
—
Shoko alternates between looking at you and flipping the pages of the report in her clipboard. It seems that you’re technically back to normal but she’s got that look in her face as if a couple of words are stuck behind her throat.
“It’s fine. Hit me with it,” you prompt. “What is it?”
“Well, you’re now a full-blown omega is what it is,” Shoko says without an ounce of concern in her voice. “But seeing as you’ve got… help now,” Shoko’s eyes dart to Satoru who’s standing in the corner, “there’s really not much to do about it.”
“Is that so?” You chuckle at the playful tension between Satoru and Shoko.
“You’re ‘help’, by the way,” Shoko addresses Satoru.
“A big one, too,” he adds.
“Keep it in your pants.” Shoko puts her clipboard aside and scratches her temple. “Still, it’s insane that this is what finally brought you two together.”
Shoko’s words put a longing, knowing smile to your face. "This silly guy waited too long."
“Hey, if that’s what it took. Who am I to complain?” Satoru shrugs, ego fluffed by the thought that you’re finally his. And the fact that he and you are the only active alpha and omega in the world? How special is that?
pspsps. reblogs and comments are appreciated ♥︎
#jjk gojo#gojo#gojo satoru#gojo x reader#jjk x reader#gojo smut#jjk smut#jujutsu kaisen x reader#jujutsu kaisen smut#jujutsu kaisen#jjk#jjk x you#jujutsu kaisen fanfic#!love letters#!jjk#!gojo#!holic#!collabs
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how to find literally any post on a blog in seconds (on desktop)
there are so many posts about ~tumblr is so broken, you can’t find any post on your own blog, it’s impossible, bluhrblub~
I am here to tell you otherwise! it is in fact INCREDIBLY easy to find a post on a blog if you’re on desktop/browser and you know what you’re doing:
url.tumblr.com/tagged/croissant will bring up EVERY post on the blog tagged with the specific and exact phrase #croissant. every single post, every single time. in chronological order starting with the most recent post. note: it will not find #croissants or that time you made the typo #croidnssants. for a tag with multiple words, it’s just /tagged/my-croissant and it will show you everything with the exact phrase #my croissant
url.tumblr.com/tagged/croissant/chrono will bring up EVERY post on the blog tagged with the exact phrase #croissant, but it will show them in reverse order with the oldest first
url.tumblr.com/search/croissant isn’t as perfect at finding everything, but it’s generally loads better than the search on mobile. it will find a good array of posts that have the word croissant in them somewhere. could be in the body of the post (op captioned it “look at my croissant”) or in the tags (#man I want a croissant). it won’t necessarily find EVERYTHING like /tagged/ does, but I find it’s still more reliable than search on mobile. you can sometimes even find posts by a specific user by searching their url. also, unlike whatever random assortment tumblr mobile pulls up, it will still show them in a more logically chronological order
url.tumblr.com/day/2020/11/05 will show you every post on the blog from november 5th, 2020, in case you’re taking a break from croissants to look for destiel election memes
url.tumblr.com/archive/ is search paradise. easily go to a particular month and see all posts as thumbnails! search by post type! search by tags but as thumbnails now
url.tumblr.com/archive/filter-by/audio will show you every audio post on your blog (you can also filter by other post types). sometimes a little imperfect if you’re looking for a video when the op embedded the video in a text post instead of posting as a video post, etc
url.tumblr.com/archive/tagged/croissant will show you EVERY post on the blog tagged with the specific and exact phrase #croissant, but it will show you them in the archive thumbnail view divided by months. very useful if you’re looking for a specific picture of a croissant that was reblogged 6 months ago and want to be able to scan for it quickly
url.tumblr.com/archive/filter-by/audio/tagged/croissant will show you every audio post tagged with the specific phrase #croissant (you can also filter by photo or text instead, because I don’t know why you have audio posts tagged croissant)
the tag system on desktop tumblr is GENUINELY amazing for searching within a specific blog!
caveat: this assumes a person HAS a desktop theme (or “custom theme”) enabled. a “custom theme” is url.tumblr.com, as opposed to tumblr.com/url. I’ve heard you have to opt-into the former now, when it used to be the default, so not everyone HAS a custom theme where you can use all those neat url tricks.
if the person doesn’t have a “custom theme” enabled, you’re beholden to the search bar. still, I’ve found the search bar on tumblr.com/url is WAY more reliable than search on mobile. for starters, it tends to bring posts up in a sensible order, instead of dredging up random posts from 2013 before anything else
if you’re on mobile, I’m sorry. godspeed and good luck finding anything. (my one tip is that if you’re able to click ON a tag rather than go through the search bar, you’ll have better luck. if your mutual has recently reblogged a post tagged #croissant, you can click #croissant and it’ll bring up everything tagged #croissant just like /tagged/croissant. but if there’s no readily available tag to click on, you have to rely on the mobile search bar and its weird bizarre whims)
#tumblr#tumblr tips#tumblr tags#tumblr search#tumblr how to#new to tumblr#why did I pick croissants as the example? who knows!#but I'm a pro at finding things on people's blogs especially my own#takes me like 4 seconds to find Exactly The Post I'm Looking For no matter how long ago I reblogged it
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Writing Angry Scenes: Tips to Avoid Melodrama and Make It Real
Anger can be one of the most intense, relatable emotions to read—and one of the trickiest to write. When handled well, an angry scene can pull readers deep into the emotional world of a character, building tension and driving the story forward. But when handled poorly, anger can easily slip into melodrama, making the character’s feelings seem overblown, forced, or even cringe-worthy.
So how can you avoid these pitfalls and write anger that feels real and compelling? Here are some tips to make angry scenes powerful without overdoing it.
1. Understand What Fuels Your Character’s Anger
To write anger authentically, you need to understand its roots. People get angry for complex reasons—fear, frustration, betrayal, grief, and even love. Ask yourself what’s truly driving your character’s anger. Are they afraid of losing control? Do they feel abandoned or misunderstood? Are they hurt by someone they trusted? Anger rarely exists in isolation, so dig into the deeper emotions fueling it.
When you understand the core reasons behind a character’s anger, you can weave those nuances into the scene, making the anger more relatable and layered. Readers will feel the depth of the character's rage, not just the surface heat of it.
2. Show, Don’t Tell—But Don’t Overdo It
“Show, don’t tell” is classic writing advice, but it’s especially crucial in angry scenes. Don’t rely on generic phrases like “She was furious” or “He clenched his fists in anger.” Instead, look for unique ways to convey how this specific character experiences anger. Maybe their voice drops to a deadly calm, or their eyes narrow in a way that makes everyone around them uncomfortable.
That said, showing too much can backfire, especially with exaggerated descriptions. Over-the-top body language, excessive shouting, or too many “flaring nostrils” can tip the scene into melodrama. Use body language and physical cues sparingly and mix them with subtler reactions for a more realistic portrayal.
3. Use Dialogue to Reveal Hidden Layers
People rarely say exactly what they feel, especially when they’re angry. Angry dialogue isn’t just about yelling or throwing out insults; it’s an opportunity to show the character’s deeper thoughts and vulnerabilities.
Consider using controlled, icy responses or unexpected silences. Maybe your character says something hurtful in a low voice rather than screaming. They might express sarcasm, avoidance, or even laugh at the wrong moment. Anger often carries hidden layers, and using these nuances can help your character’s dialogue feel genuine, even haunting, without falling into dramatic clichés.
4. Control the Pacing of the Scene
The pacing of an angry scene can be the difference between a powerful moment and a melodramatic one. In real life, anger doesn’t always erupt instantly; it can simmer, spike, or deflate depending on the situation and the character’s personality. Experiment with different pacing techniques to create tension.
You might build the anger slowly, with small signs that something’s brewing. Or maybe the character explodes suddenly, only to calm down just as quickly, leaving a chill in the air. Controlling the pace helps you control the reader’s emotional engagement, drawing them in without overwhelming them.
5. Avoid Clichéd Expressions and Overused Reactions
When writing anger, avoid falling back on clichés like “seeing red,” “boiling with rage,” or “blood boiling.” These phrases have been overused to the point that they lose their impact. Instead, get creative and think about how your character’s anger might feel specifically to them.
Maybe their skin feels prickly, or their jaw aches from clenching it. Think about details that are unique to the character and to the moment. By focusing on small, unique sensory details, you’ll help readers feel the anger rather than just reading about it.
6. Let the Setting Reflect the Emotion
The setting can be an effective tool to amplify a character’s anger without overstating it. Small details in the environment—such as the hum of a refrigerator, the slow ticking of a clock, or the distant sounds of laughter—can create a sense of contrast or isolation that heightens the character’s rage.
For example, imagine a character seething in a peaceful park or a quiet library. The calm of the surroundings can make their anger feel more potent. Or maybe they’re in a crowded, noisy room where they feel unseen and unheard, which fuels their frustration further. This use of setting can add depth to the scene without the need for dramatic gestures.
7. Let Consequences Speak for Themselves
An effective way to avoid melodrama is to let the consequences of the anger show its intensity. Characters don’t always have to yell or physically react; sometimes, a single choice can convey more than any outburst.
Perhaps your character cuts off a close friend or says something they can’t take back. Maybe they throw away a meaningful object or walk out in silence. By focusing on the consequences of their anger, you can reveal the impact without over-explaining it.
8. Let the Emotion Simmer After the Scene Ends
Anger is rarely resolved in a single moment, and its effects often linger. When writing an angry scene, think about how it will affect your character moving forward. Are they holding onto grudges? Do they feel guilty or exhausted afterward? Does their anger transform into something else, like sadness or regret?
Allowing the anger to simmer in your character’s mind even after the scene ends creates a more authentic and layered portrayal. It shows that anger is complex and doesn’t just disappear the moment the scene is over, adding emotional weight to both the character and the story.
#writing tips#writing advice#character development#writers on tumblr#writeblr#creative writing#fiction writing#writerscommunity#writing#writing help#writing resources#ai assisted
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✎ STOP CALLING IT YOUR DREAM REALITY
why is it desired when it has already happened?
You need to realise that you are already in the reality you have chosen, you are in the reality that is desired. Stop viewing your new life as far-fetched and magical. Some of you think that with the crazy things in your script, it makes it harder to shift, than it would be to manifest something “small”. But let me tell you, you’re already there.
stop envying that girl’s body, you already have it, if not better
stop envying all the rich people’s vacations and hauls you see on socials, you live that life
stop envying the person with the pretty face, you have one too
stop getting jealous of a certain pop group, tv show cast or celebrity for getting to do the things that you want to do, you ARE doing all that you have ever wanted
stop envying the person your s/o has dating rumours with, they’re yours and always have been
because you’re a god.
stop getting jealous of the person with the perfect parents and rich family, your family was real the second you scripted them, you see them every day, no big deal
don’t you get it? the 3d isn’t real, what you’re seeing isn’t real if you don’t want it to be.
it’s not your dream reality, it’s your current reality, get comfortable and casual about it, it’s your everyday life, nothing special to you. stop scrambling for methods as if you aren’t in your reality already. stop treating your new life as a prize, it’s nothing special because you had it the second you thought about it. stop viewing your new life as some accomplishment to strive for, it’s your everyday experience, again nothing special.
as a god, every reality is your creation, why are you looking at your creations as the prize when the prize is you? why are you looking at your new life as something to work hard for, something to put effort in to have? why, why, why when it’s already yours?
you cant leave if you don’t acknowledge that this new life is already yours. You’ll always be in the state of desiring and never in the state of having if you don’t fix this mindset. It also puts more pressure on you when attempting to induce pure consciousness, you think everything is riding on inducing pure consciousness, you think your dream wont happen if you don’t do it. why do you think the weight of your new life relies on whether you’re able to induce pure conscious or whether you’re able to shift, when it’s already yours and you already live that life?
i’ll tell you why you think this way: it’s because you don’t see it as yours yet, you think it will only become yours when you have done all these things.
what you see: script + void/“I AM” state ➯ my dream life is finally mine
you see it as a process when it isn’t one, there is no process
what actually happens: i’ve created my dream life in my head ➯ i have it now, it’s not a dream anymore
it’s an immediate chain of events, not a process. so stop with the jealousy, being miserable and asking the same questions, it’s BEEN yours
as soon as you take that pressure away from the act of shifting, because you KNOW your new life belongs to you no matter what, it puts less stress on you, making inducing pure consciousness easier
that’s it that’s all, ITS ALREADY YOURS DONT SEE IT AS A PROCESS 🌌💋
#salemlunaa#shiftblr#reality shifting#shifting#permashifting#law of assumption#loa#void state#success story#the void#void concept#respawning#shifting community#shifting blog#shifters#void state tips#the void state#voidstate#i am state#pure consciousness
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I LOVE Dungeon Meshi's Realistic Fantasy Races
Ok, I had to stop for a moment to gush about the fantasy races of Dunmeshi, and all the consideration that's been put into them, because they actually follow a degree of natural/evolutionary logic not found in most fantasy stories!
Half-Foots (halflings/hobbits):
So we all know these fellows have excellent hearing and smell, but have you considered WHY? It's an adaptation to counteract their size. Humans (called tallmen in this setting) rely so much on eyesight because we're really tall compared to most animals, giving us a fantastic vantage of our environment. Half-Foots don't have this advantage, and therefore rely on their other senses. It's also much more important for them to be able to detect unseen threats and move quickly, because their size makes them ill-equipped for direct conflict.
Dwarves:
So Dwarves are depicted as MUCH stronger than tallmen despite their size, right? This is because strength is determined not by size, but by mass, and dwarven bodies are very dense! Yet this comes with the downside of their bodies burning more energy and overheating much faster, which is why dwarves are also shown to be heat-resistant, and why they tend to wear lighter clothing that exposes more skin! Their night-vision is also better than humans' due to their semi-underground lifestyle, while their hearing remains about the same since sound naturally carries in caves. Their hairiness is also likely a direct adaptation to counteract magic, as it's been shown to form a natural buffer when left unwashed.
Gnomes:
Gnomes are supposed to be evolutionary cousins to dwarves, and it shows! They share a similar height, but are less muscular and have peculiarly-shaped ears, almost mirroring the difference between human and elven ears. Their affinity with nature and spirits also makes sense, because physically they're in an awkward spot compared to the other short races, lacking both the hefty strength of dwarves and the light nimbleness of half-foots. Being less equipped both for fight and flight, it makes sense they'd instead adapt the instinctive ability to read their environments and mitigate its threats through cohabitation.
Elves:
Like gnomes, elves are in a physically awkward place, however it's even more extreme. Their relatively light and weak bodies make them ill-equipped for direct conflict, and while likely able to move faster than tallmen due to weight, they lack the half-foot's danger-detection senses. This makes them seemingly helpless, however interestingly it actually explains why they're so advanced compared to other races! They were basically forced to coordinate problem-solve, and control their environments out of necessity, which is reflected in their more controlling and direct relationship with magic and nature compared to gnomes.
This actually mirrors the real-world difference between humans and neanderthals. Anthropologists believe neanderthals weren't actually dumber than humans, but that their superior strength and durability meant they weren't forced to problem-solve or control their environments like humans, meaning they seemed less advanced.
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Dark Romance
Astrology Observations
-❤️Birth chart placements showing "words of affirmation" as a love language: ❤️
Moon, Venus or Mercury in air signs
Virgo/Gemini/Leo placements
Mercury in the air houses, 3rd, 7th, 11th
7th house in gemini, libra, aquarius
Gemini, LIbra, Aquarius Rising
Venus - Mercury aspects
Moon - Mercury aspects
Sun - Mercury aspects
Virgo/Sagittarius and Gemini placements can be good writers. They can be good at writing on any topic. If you ever decide to write a dark romance book, you can have success alongside that
I observed that for earth & water placements especially Venus and Moon is very important to show that you care and have time for them, dont cancel things with them since they may overthink you dont pay that much attention to the relationship
Scorpio, Aquarius and Capricorn placements especially Venus/Mars/Moon value loyalty a lot in their romantic relationships, they are also value trust in their relations as well
Taurus Sun/Moon/Mars may love to be surprised by their partners with love gifts/does not have to be something fancy or expensive. Just make sure they appreciate it
Venus in the 6h/Venus at 6 or 18 degrees/Venus in Virgo are adorable in a love relatinship, they will always pay attention to everything!! They can offer to do romantic things for you as a gift of their adoration for you
Venus in the 12H or Venus at 12, 24 degrees can have dreams about their partners or future potential partners, they can dream about being into a relationship like in movies
Venus aspecting Pluto in my opinion is the definition of dark romance, this aspect can often make the native to fall in love with "villain" type of partners, or the "bad guys", not the stereotypes but the true meaning of them
South Node aspecting Venus in my opinion is like you try to find your love in every life you have, past or present always searching for that "one"
Pisces/Libra/Taurus Moon/Mars/Venus/7th house need romanticisim in their relationship, they are nothing without the feeling of love in their lives. They can always give the same energy back
Leo/Virgo/Cancer Moon/Mars/Venus/7th house need someone they can rely on in their relationships, a partner you can always count on, someone supportive and proud for being your partner
Capricorn/Aquarius/Aries Moon/Mars/Venus/7th house need a love partner who can see the good in them even when they fail, someone they can go through the challenges of life, someone they can grow old with
Scorpio/Gemini/Sagittarius Moon/Mars/Venus/7th house need someone who lasts, someone who will always choose them, someone who is worthy to love with all of your heart and soul, a love partner who will always put you first
Jupiter aspecting in good aspects Venus natives can have really beautiful and blessed love relationships, you can feel the luckiest with them, truly a real fantasy
Pluto/Neptune/Uranus and Saturn in the 7H give the vibe of "You did all of these just to find the love you always deserved". Generational planets last long and are secured
Moon/Mercury/Mars and venus in the 5H give beautiful creative relationships, someone you can always learn from, someone you can create beautiful things togther
Sun in the 4H husbands will give their life and soul for their family/kids, they will be the best husbands to everyone and kind of like a fahter example to others
If they have their Mars in the same sign as your Venus you can feel both of an attraction and denial to eachother, like you know that you love them but in a way you wanna keep it away too
Mars in Sagittarius/9H or at 9, 21 degrees will be down for whatever you want to do, they love trying new things and love to live the experience together with their partners
LIlith aspecting Sun can create a sort of mystery around people and secret admires, like you can never know if someone has an interest in you because of this secretive aura
Your MARS SIGN can be attracted over the body part its zodiac sign rules over:
For exmaple cancer mars attracted to the chest
leo mars attracted to the upper back/back
capricorn/aquarius legs zone
scorpio mars genital zone
aries mars to the face zone
taurus/gemini to the neck/ears/hands
pisces mars to the feet (No kink shame)
sag mars to the hips/thighs
virgo mars to the belly zone/waist
libra mars to the butt
5H Placements especially mercury, venus or moon can get in relationships young, is that "high school" love, gemini/virgo over the 5h can as well
Having a partner who has 8H placements especially Jupiter/uranus/venus and mercury is so HOT! Dominant energy yet always lovely to their partners!!
Uranus in the 5h/8H can make people interseted in your sexual life, sexuality, kinks, things that turn you on and so many others,,,some got no shame at all
Uranus in 2h or the 6h loves a good damn physcal touch!, they will love being touched everywhere but i feel they mostly like to give hugs and kisses
Lilith aspecting Neptune can give sexual fantasies/illusions, they can have lots of sexual dreams as well in harsh aspects these can be too intense
Lilith aspecting Jupiter can have a very high libido/sexual life or they may seek/look for that in the future, especially in harsh aspects can make the naitve a "nympho"
3H placements like mars/venus or even pluto can give someone a car/motorbike love fantasy for example making love in the car, or idk kisisng on your partners motorbike is something that is usually involved with these
Pluto or Neptune in the 8H can make the native sexual obsessed or obsessed with sexual tendency! It can go or transform into an addiction over time
9H placements can make good family bounds with their partners family. esp a good sister or brother in law, in case of marriage it can bring more abundency to both natives life
11H love placements like venus,moon/juno can easily have those "friend to lovers" relationship and i knowww this have been said for too long so lets switch a bit, they can create a very deep bound with their partners, i think ppl with these placements fight less or have less arguments because they understand each-other so good, if venus or moon has good aspects it can turn into a really good relationship
I heard some bloggers saying that Saturn in the 7H can be a boring love relationship placement and i felt like i need to say something about this because i dont think is that easy to have this placement in the 1st place, is something that grows overtime and usually gives more results when you become an adult, it gives a good amount or resurance about your partner, for some people even a sucessful relationship, a good bounding with them, more maturing relationships, and a very supportive spouse. I dont think any placements are boring in love topics. Maybe is just the process of waiting for that one person that can be "boring"
People who have scandals or dramas around their relationship can have Libra Mars or mars in the 7H because, is usually coming from other people rather than the partner or relationship itself, is more like people trying to break up your relationship, thats why some people choose to keep their relationships private
In a womans chart, the sun can also represent 2nd marriages or 2nd relationships in case there are some. It is mostly for those who have been divorced
Mercury in harsh aspects to Venus or Moon can make you feel like youre gonna embarass yourself in front of your partner, which is mostly not the case, never be afaird to show your fully self to your partner because if they are right one they will aceept all your silly sides
Friday 11th 🤎🤎 sounds so dark for some reason, and I love it!!! Hope you all have a good Friday and weekend as well
#dark#october#halloween#astrology#astro observations#birth chart#astro notes#astrology observations#placements#astro community#horoscope#ascendant#astro.com#astroblog#astroseek#astrocom#astrologers#astronote#astro#astro placements#dark astrology#dark aura#dark fantasy#red#mood#vibe#harmoonix
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Some quick sketches of how I think this would look...
Just found out electric eels a) technically aren't eels, they're just fish that look like eels and b) swim in a special way that make them extremely fast swimmers (with average speeds of 62 mph)
So anyway, merperson au where the speedsters are electric eels
#they don't have arms yet... I'm working on it#im thinking they start out tadpole ish and have to rely on large fins to propel them in adolescence#because they don't have enough strength or length to swim the special aerodynamic way eels do yet#then when they hit puberty their tail growth speeds up and their fins get stretched out#the little side fins stay the same size their entire life though. they're only really used in adolescence#no gills because eels breathe via their lungs. this is also why eels can survive out of water for hours#so these guys can slither around land as much as they want as long as their tails don't dry out#their tails are all muscle as adults. flatter than a snake but still snake like. they can 'stand' fairly tall as long as they can balance#and they slither like a snake#as adults they swim sideways through the water. its weird looking but goddamn is it fast#then of course there's the little 'eyes' all over their body. they sense electricity and they glow when they are 'charged'#(ie about to attack)#babies only have one (big one on the chest) and it is sensory only. this helps them sense where their parents are#adolescents have a few on the chest that are sensors and defensive. they only have a few on the waist however#and those ones are only sensory#adults have 'eyes' along the entire length of their tail and all are duel purpose#babies tails and fins are a pale yellow (sand color) as they don't have any defenses and need to blend in#adolescents are bright yellow. neon. this is a warning to stay away.#adults are bright red. in shallow water this is a warning to stay away. in deeper water this is a camouflaging technique for hunting#because red is the first color to 'disapear' in deep water. it shows up as blue. also most fish can't see the color red anyway#teenagers are randomly mixed red and yellow as their adult color haphazardly grows in
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A neat thing about The Goblin Emperor is that while it's a classic trope of the lost heir plunged into a morass of courtly intrigue where he has no idea whom he can trust, the very first thing it does is emphasize how much he has to choose to trust anyway. Maia has to trust the head of his household to appoint his body servants, and he has to trust those servants. He has to trust the adremaza to appoint his nohecharei, and he has to trust his nohecharei. Any one of these people could kill him. Any one of them could carry gossip to his enemies, or make him look bad in public and thus weaken him in the eyes of the court. But if he so much as implies a discomfort with these choices, he'll offend powerful people without cause – and anyway, how could he possibly pick better? He has no idea what he's doing. He's forced to rely on people. He's forced to trust. The only person he actually personally chooses is Csevet, and what he chooses to do is essentially hand Csevet the keys to the empire. He got so fucking lucky there, that could have gone so incredibly badly.
But it didn't. Because, as the book emphasizes, trust is the right choice. Even when it does go badly, even when he is betrayed, that doesn't mean the trust was wrong. Because when one person betrays him, every single other person around him shows how truly loyal they are, not only by rushing to his aid, but by caring so deeply and obviously about him.
That's why this book feels so odd for its genre: there's a bunch of complex courtly intrigue going on, but Maia never plays the game. He never schemes, he's never playing 5D chess with his enemies. He has to navigate the factions of the court and try to win them to his side, but he does so by being kind and forthright. He's completely blindsided by the coup attempts, and frankly so are we, because he's just been focusing on other stuff! And he survives them, not through his own cunning, but through the love of those he placed his trust in.
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From Gold to Mold
Chapter 5: The Departure (Warning: this chapter will contain violence. Read at your own risk.)
It’s been around two months since you accepted the Megamycete into your body and for the first time since you were dragged to Gotham, you’re actually happy. With its vast archives, you’re bursting with knowledge spanning over the course of four-hundred years, ranging from the academic to the arts and it’s thanks to that knowledge that your grades have skyrocketed in the past few weeks; where once you struggled with something, now you know better than even the teachers, even correcting them when they make a mistake and outpacing the best students in your class. Sure, by this time, it’s a little too late to get to the top of your class, but you really don’t care about your ranking; all that matters is being able to complete your homework, class assignments, and tests in record time, giving you time to work on more important things, like your game.
Included in the Megamycete’s records are the knowledge and memories of many computer programmers, some of them working for Bruce in his tech division; you also have many artists and musicians swimming in your head, many of them talented in making art on computers, so with your newfound knowledge, you’ve made tremendous strides in making your game. A year ago, you thought you would have to find a way to crowdfund the game in order to pay artists, musicians, and programmers and it would take a few years to make it ready for players, but now, you’re sure you can have this game ready by yourself within the year.
Not only has your intellectual attributes increased, but so have your physical abilities; the Megamycete’s records also include many athletes, both professional and student, and you know how to play every sport that’s ever been played in Gotham, but you haven’t shown any improvement in gym class. You never had any interest in sports before and you sure as hell don’t know. Plus, if you suddenly start showing everyone in the school that you’ve all of a sudden become smarter and stronger out of nowhere, you might attract enough attention that not even the Waynes can ignore.
And that won’t end well for anyone.
Speaking of them, you know they heard about what happened at the My Alibi bar and are working overtime to find the culprit, the only thing they know for certain is that it was the work of someone new. It actually brought a smile to your face when you learned about it, that for all their detective skills, they have no idea that the person they’re hunting for is under their own roof. While Damian is the only one to have ever told you to your face, you know they all think you’re stupid; that because you chose to deal with your fucked up life in a semi-healthy way and not dress up in some stupid little costume and fistfight psychopaths, that must mean there’s something wrong with you in the head.
Fuck all of them. You don’t need them and tomorrow night, you’ll be driving back to Goodsprings.
When you turned eighteen, you inherited all of your Momma’s assets, namely her life insurance policy, bank accounts, and royalties from all her books, all of which was worth a little over two-million; at first, you were going to save that money for when you moved back to Goodsprings in case you had to fix up your old home and pay the bills, but after almost dying due to relying on bus stops and bumming rides off of Alfred was unfair to the man, you decided to take some of the money and invest it in a car. The Megamycete had absorbed many modern car experts, so you were able to pick out a brand new car that was worth the hit to your wallet.
Plus, you had a way of earning a pretty penny and stick it to Bruce at the same time: sell his proprietary technology to Lex Corp. Many of Bruce’s employees are buried in Gotham’s cemeteries, some of them working on the latest technological breakthrough at the time of their deaths and you knew Bruce’s biggest business rival would kill to see what Bruce’s scientists are cooking up in their lab.
You reached out to the man using your computer knowledge to send him an email that couldn’t be traced back to you, stating you had the specs for several of Wayne Enterprises’ latest large scale projects and asked him if he was interested in buying them for a couple million in cash. Knowing he’d never consider the deal without some proof, you included bits and pieces of what you were offering, just enough to show you were legit, but not enough to be useful without the rest of it.
Sure enough, he took the hit and now, here you are, meeting with the most powerful man in Metropolis in his office, which overlooks the entire city. Of course, you’re smart enough to not show him your face, so you took the form of some Joe Schmo that died years ago.
“I don’t believe it,” the man exclaims as he sifts through the papers you drew the designs on. “Medicine, experimental aircraft specs, software designs! Over a million spent in corporate espionage and nothing to show for it. Then you come along, offering more than enough to recoup those losses and then some.” He looks back at you, an ominous twinkle in his eye that makes you shiver. “Any chance I can rely on your services in the future?”
“Perhaps,” you say in your disguised voice. “If I get my hands on more WE secrets, I’ll keep you in mind. Now, about my money?”
“Of course,” he purrs. He snaps at his assistant, who places the briefcase she was holding on his desk and opens it, revealing more money than you’ve ever seen in your entire life. “Twenty million in unmarked bills. I trust that’s more than enough?”
“Yes,” you say, trying to hide your shock from earning enough money to last you the rest of your life in just a few seconds. “I believe it is.”
(We see no signs of sabotage or subterfuge,) the Megamycete says. (It would appear Luthor intends to keep his word. For once.)
“Mercy will see you out,” Lex says as you take the briefcase. He then holds out a business card. “And this is my personal number and email. If you have more secrets you’re looking to sell, call me day or night.”
“Thank you,” you say as you pocket the card.
And with that, you follow the assistant out of Lex’s office and down to the lobby.
(You must be happy to have amassed such a fortune,) the Megamycete states as you walk out the front door. (And exacting revenge on Bruce Wayne makes this moment all the better.)
“You’re damn right,” you respond with a chuckle.
(Perhaps you could use some of that money to enjoy yourself? Since our joining, you have been hard at work with your education or your project. Taking some time to have fun will do you a world of good.)
Its words resonate with you. Sure, you’ve been busy with catching up on school and the gaps in your game, but you’ve done some fun things the last few weeks, right?
(No, we are afraid you have not.)
“Damn,” you mutter. “Guess I should change that.” You glance down at the briefcase in your hand. “Well, we have twenty mil of Lex’s money in here. How about have a night out in Gotham?”
(We agree wholeheartedly,” it exclaims, its voice full of joy and anticipation. (We look forward to seeing what you have planned.)
You chuckle as you change your form to your hardened mold armor and wings and take flight into Metropolis’ night sky. Fortunately for you, it’s a quiet night in the massive city, so Superman isn’t flying around, so you don’t have to worry about bumping into the Man of Steel.
“I gotta say, this city looks a helluva lot better than Gotham,” you remark as you soar above the skyscrapers. “Gotham looks like a giant tomb while Metropolis looks like the future.”
(Yes, we have noticed that no matter the era, the architecture of Gotham refuses to change. The city seems to be doomed to remain locked in a by-gone age. We look forward to seeing the world beyond.)
“You’ll love Goodsprings. Sure, it’s the size of a stamp compared to a behemoth like Gotham, but you can actually sit on your porch at night and not have to worry about gunshots or escaped lunatics. People actually have conversations with one another instead of telling you to fuck off.”
In a less than thirty minutes, you arrive back at Gotham and land on the roof of Wayne Manor and quietly sneak in. Joker’s still on the loose, no doubt waiting for the perfect moment to unveil his latest sick and twisted plan, so everyone’s out and Alfred’s stuck in the Batcave, keeping an eye on camera feeds.
You take out a few bills from the briefcase before hiding it under your mattress and heading out to the back where you keep your car parked. While Bruce has multiple cars, every single one of them is a high-end luxury car that costs way more than yours, so you didn’t want to take the risk of Bruce or the others finding it and doing something to it, so you keep your car behind a large barn that’s used to hold all the groundskeeping equipment.
As you drive off the property, you tell your phone to dial Alfred, who answers it halfway through the first ring.
“Master Y/N, is everything alright?”
“Yeah, Alfred, everything’s fine. I was just letting you know that I’m going out for a bit. Thought some time outside the house would do me some good.”
“While I agree that you need to get more, perhaps tonight isn’t the best time,” he says hesitantly. “I mean, the Joker is still out there, no doubt planning another heinous act.”
You’re touched by the man’s concern for you. Really, you are. But, with the Megamycete, you have nothing to fear.
“Don’t worry, Alfred, I’ll be fine.,” you reassure him. “I promise I won’t be gone too long. I’ll just be in Amusement Mile for an hour or two.”
“Still, I wish you weren’t going by yourself. Perhaps I can get one of your siblings—“
“No,” you cut him off. “I’m going out to have fun before I graduate, not be miserable. If I wanted to be tortured, I’d throw myself in Arkham’s Intensive Care Building.”
“I know why you feel that way, Master Y/N, but maybe you can give them another chance? You’ll be graduating tomorrow night and leaving after the ceremony. I just don’t want you leaving us under such bad circumstances.”
You know the man’s been trying to get the Waynes to notice you, but they’re all busy with their own lives in addition to being vigilantes at night, either fighting crime in Gotham, Blüdhaven, or elsewhere around the world. And when they’re all home, they’re spending time together, having fun that was never meant to include you. You learned that after countless times coming downstairs and seeing them, eating delicious food, laughing, watching movies, and enjoying themselves without you. After a while, you stopped going downstairs when you heard noises coming from the living room.
You don’t belong here, either in the Wayne Family or in Gotham. You never did. You know it, they know it, and deep down, Alfred knows it, whether he wants to admit it or not. You’re a Gould, not a Wayne and there’s nothing that’s going to change that.
“Alfred, I think the ship for us being a ‘happy, loving family’ sailed long time ago. They’ve made it clear that there’s no room for me in their world and I sure as hell don’t want them in mine. All I want to do is go home.”
“I understand,” he says after a brief moment of silence. “I hope you have fun, Master Y/N. And please, if you get into trouble, call me straight away.”
“I will, Alfred. I’ll talk to you later.” And with that, you hang up.
You let out a sigh when the line goes dead. You hated saying things like that to the poor man, but it’s how you feel about the Waynes. Ever since you moved in, all you heard about Bruce is that he’s a caring man and a loving father, but that care and love only appears to be for those he deems worthy of it. For someone like you, a bastard born from a careless one-night stand, he has nothing but neglect and indifference.
And the same goes for the others. They’re all a dysfunctional hodgepodge that are saturated with so much trauma and paranoia that it’s a miracle that they haven’t killed each other yet. You’re sure if they were locked up in Arkham and studied, they could fill an entire library’s worth of psychological textbooks.
(You should not concern yourself with them. They have made it clear that they are not worthy of your love or forgiveness. After so many years of suffering, you are so close to breaking free from your prison. By this time tomorrow, you will be back where you belong.)
“Yeah, back home. Finally.”
After thirty grueling minutes of dealing with Gotham’s traffic, you finally reach your destination: Bat Burger. As much as you hate any mention of Batman, Gotham’s cashed in on the “Bat Craze” and inserts him into anything they can. At least the food’s good; almost good enough to make you ignore the cartoonish Batfamily designs on all the walls. Emphasis on the almost.
“Welcome to Bat Burger,” the teenage cashier, dressed in a uniform designed around Batman, says in a monotone voice as you approach the counter. A brief look in his eyes tells you he’d rather be anywhere else right now. “How can I bring justice to your hunger today?”
“Can I get a Batburger with ketchup, large fries, and a large Bat Cola?”
“Do you want to Jokerize those fries,” he asks as he types in your order.
“No thanks.” You hand him a hundred dollar bill. “I don’t need the change. Keep it as a tip.”
“Oh,” he exclaims, the dead look in his eye gone, replaced by shock. “You sure?”
“Yeah,” you respond, happy to see such a transformation in the teen.
“Thank you,” he stutters as he hands you your cup for your drink. “Your food’ll be out in a minute. Let me know if you need anything else.”
You nod as you take the cup to the drink station.
(That was quite charitable of you,) the Megamycete remarks as you fill up your cup. (Such an action is rare in this city.)
“He looked like he needed it. I know what it’s like to be that miserable. Plus, it’s not like we’re hurting for money. If I ever run low, I still have plenty of Bruce’s secrets I can sell to Lex for a couple million.”
(Indeed. It would appear he had many of his employees working on secret projects that were not meant to be released. Perhaps such things were only meant for his nightly activities?)
“Wouldn’t doubt it,” you say as you sit down. “Kinda surprised no one’s figured it out. Batman’s toys look expensive and there’s not that many people in Gotham that could foot a bill that big other than Bruce Wayne.”
Not long after that, your order was called and you collected your fast food goodness. You practically moan as you take your first bite.
(This is quite appealing,) it says as you take another bite. (Savoring the food in real time is far batter than savoring it from the memories of the deceased.)
“I’ve wanted to come here for a while,” you say as you take a few fries. “Always saw the garbage cans full of Batburger bags when they came back from patrol. They never offered to take me and I never asked.”
(Their loss, we assure you. We can think of no better meal companion.)
“Shucks,” you chuckle. “You’re making me blush.”
After your meal, you decided to go to the arcade a few blocks away from the restaurant, eager to show the Megamycete all your favorite games. Also, with it behind you, you might be able to earn more tickets and win some of the bigger prizes. Your stride’s broken when you hear screaming, gunfire, and people running from the Gotham Arcade.
“What’s going on,” you ask a man as he tries to run past you.
“It’s Joker,” he exclaims, his eyes full of fear. “He’s shooting up the place!”
He runs away as you duck into an alley and call upon the mold to form the armor you’ve been using a lot lately. As you walk towards the arcade, you look through the roots and see the Bats scattered across the city, handling other crises; meaning they wouldn’t be here anytime soon.
“Guess it’s up to us to save the day.”
(The Clown has added many into our archives, all of whom spent their last moments of life terrified and in pain. We think it is time he knows fear.)
You walk into the arcade and are greeted by with over a dozen bodies, all of them riddled with bullet holes.
“My god,” you say, stepping over two teen boys who look like brothers. “There wasn’t a point to this. This is an arcade, not a bank. He just did this because he could.”
You follow the sound of gunfire until you see the Joker, dressed in his signature purple suit, shooting at a bunch of arcade cabinets.
“This is so much fun,” he exclaims as he rips a bunch of tickets from the machines. “Don’t you agree, Harley?”
“Sure do, Mistah J,” his partner, clad in her usual red and black spandex and jester hat, answers as she slams her giant mallet down on a poor Whack-A-Mole machine. She bends down and rips out a bunch of tickets from the smoking husk and holds it up to Joker like some offering to an ancient god. “Look, Puddin’, I won so many tickets!”
It’s then the two lunatics notice your presence.
“Well, well, well,” Joker says as he pockets his ill-gotten tickets. “Not the costumed freak I was expecting.” He holds his hands up to his head. “You’re missing the ears and everything.”
The two laugh and you roll your eyes under your mask.
“Looks like Ol’ Batsy has a new brat in his nest,” she jokes. “So, who’re you?”
“Oh, Harley, his name doesn’t matter.” He pulls out his gun and points it at you. “He’ll just be another corpse.”
He fires the gun and this time, the bullet actually penetrates your armor and pierces your lower torso. You wince at the feeling of a bullet in your gut.
(It would appear the clown uses a higher caliber than the common scum of Gotham,) the Megamycete explains as it heals your body, stitching the wound closed and hardening your armor to repel the stronger bullets. (Funny how he possesses such toys after being in Arkham for so long.)
“Oh, you’re a tough one, aren’t you,” he says, seeing that you’re not going down. “Normally, his little birdies go down from just a little love tap. Are you sure you belong to Batman?”
Now that pisses you off. Bruce may have had a hand in bringing you into the world, but you’re not his. You’re so pissed, in fact, that you raise your right arm and call upon a long tendril that pierces the center of the clown’s chest and pull him towards you.
“Mistah J,” Harley shouts in fear as you bring Joker to your face. She’s obviously paralyzed by fear because she stands there, doing nothing but watching the scene unfold before her.
His pasty white chin is covered in blood as it pours from his mouth and his eyes are wide as saucers.
“Now ain’t that a surprise,” he says with a chuckle, causing him to cough up blood.
“Get this through your sick and twisted head, clown,” you hiss. “I’m not Batman’s anything. There’s no words in any language that can express how much I hate him.”
You twist the tendril and take pleasure in watching him wince in pain.
(He fears you more than the Bat right now. Good. You are far superior than that worm and his collection of misfits. You always were.)
You feel yourself grin at that. You are better than them, aren’t you?
“And as much as I hate to admit it, Jason was right on how to deal with you. When you have a tumor, you don’t dress up in some stupid costume and beat it until it stops being a tumor.” You lift him far above, his head almost touching the ceiling. He flails around, but your tendril holds him in place. “You take a knife and cut it out.”
And with that, your tendril sprouts dozens of smaller ones that burst through his body, rendering it full of holes that it looks like a blood soaked piece of Swiss cheese. Said tendrils twist around until what was once the Joker is reduced to chunks of meat.
“Mister J,” Harley shouts, her voice full of agony, as his remains fall to the floor, landing with a wet splat. She looks at the pile of flesh, tears streaming from her eyes before turning to you, her gaze full of hate. “You bastard!”
She charges at you, her mallet raised and ready to strike, but you wrap her in your tendril, stopping her advance and making her drop her weapon. She struggles and as she does, she lets out loud sobs; ones were intimately familiar with. You let out similar ones when you lost your Momma and over the years you’ve spent in Wayne Manor.
“You killed my Puddin’,” she weeps. “When Bats hears about this, he’ll hunt you down like a damn animal! And when you’re thrown in Arkham, I’ll be waiting for ya!”
(She has a point. Batman and his flock are already looking for you and when they learn you have killed the clown, they will make finding you their top priority; they will marshal every resource at their disposal to finding your identity. Even if she cannot provide them with your identity, she presents a risk to our secrecy.)
You ponder on this as you watch Harley struggle against her bindings, her sobs now filling the arcade. You know the Megamycete is right; she’s a loose end you can’t afford, especially when you’re so close to going home. Plus, you know with Joker gone, Harley has no one to control her and with how racked with grief over the loss of her “love,” she’s a huge risk to everyone on Gotham.
You decide the risks are too great and command a smaller tendril to emerge from the one holding Harley, have it wrap itself around her neck, and quickly snap it, the noise it makes ringing in your ears like a gunshot. You release her from your grip and she tumbles to the floor, lifeless.
(It had to be done,) it assures you. (She represented a threat not just to you, but to the rest of the city. There is no telling how many people would have been hurt the next time she broke free from the asylum’s confines. Plus, the influence of the clown would have stayed with her, even after his death. She would most likely never have returned to what she once was. The rest of her life would have been spent mourning over the clown, inflicting pain onto the innocent, and escaping from and being returned to the asylum. You showed her mercy.)
You hear the words and in some way, they make sense, but right now, you don’t feel like you showed mercy. You’ve heard of the Tragedy of Doctor Harleen Quinzel, everyone in Gotham has at one point or another; the story of a poor psychiatrist new to Arkham who had been prayed upon by a manipulative mass murderer, turning her into his demented partner in crime and cutting a bloody swath across Gotham every time they escaped, leaving behind many orphans, widows, and corpses in their wake. She had spent years listening to other people’s problems and for once, wanted someone to listen to her, to make her feel like she was important.
In many ways, you can relate. Maybe in another life, you two could’ve been friends, wallowing together in your shared misery.
Just then, you learn from the roots that the Bats have been informed of the Joker’s appearance and are now on their way here to capture hm, unaware that you’d already beaten them to the punch.
“Let’s go,” you say, moving quickly. “We’re done here.”
In no time flat, you’re back to your car and out of the area before the Bats showed up.
“Sorry, buddy, but it looks like we may have to take a rain check on that night out.)
(We understand. And you should not feel guilty because of your actions. It is thanks to you that not only many will be able to sleep peacefully in their beds, but many beyond this mortal realm will finally know peace. While many threats to Gotham remain, its largest one has finally been put down.)
“Yeah, I guess.”
(It is also worth noting that we have only been joined for a short time, you have accomplished much more than Batman has the last two decades.)
That actually makes you feel a little better. Yeah, Bruce has been doing this for years and Gotham’s still a hellhole. In the span of a singe night, you make it visibly more safer. And to top it all off, he’ll be racking his brain trying to find out who the hell killed him and he’ll have no idea it was you, his forgotten firstborn son.
“That does make me feel a little better. Thanks.”
“Ok, when you find out who did this, can you please tell me so I can end them a thank you card before you lock em up,” Jason says as they watch what remains of the Joker being collected into a large evidence bag by GCPD while Harley’s body is placed on a gurney and covered by a sheet before being wheeled out.
“You know, I hate to say it,” Jim says as he dismisses a detective. “But I think this is going to make the city way safer. Hell, the mayor may want to offer whoever did this a key to the city.”
“It doesn’t matter if all crime in Gotham stops because of this,” Bruce responds. “It was done the wrong way and when I find out who did this, I’ll deliver them to Arkham myself. I’ll take Joker’s remains back to the Batcave, see if I can find any clues on the identity of his killer. I’ll give them back to you along with my findings.”
“Thanks,” the police commissioner responds as he takes the bag from a forensic investigator and hands it to him.
“Come on, B,” Jason whines as they leave the arcade. “Joker was a piece of shit and it was only gonna end with his death. Whoever this person is, do they really deserve to rot in Arkham over someone like him?”
“Whoever this person is, they took the law into their hands.”
“Pot meet kettle,” Jason mutters, but Bruce doesn’t acknowledge the remark.
“And this person clearly has powers. If they go off the deep end, there’s no telling what will happen. We need to find them before something happens and someone gets hurt.”
Finding this person just became their top priority.
This is it, the night you’ve been waiting for: graduation. It’s funny, when you first woke up this morning, you could feel every second of the day tick as you waited for the graduation ceremony. The only thing that made the time go by fast was you thinking about the conversation you overheard in the kitchen this morning.
Bruce and Tim talking about spending the day at their computers, analyzing every camera feed in Amusement Mile to look for whoever killed Joker. You had to bite your tongue to keep you from laughing. Here you are, the person they’re chomping at the bit to catch, and they have no idea you’re in the other room. You should be happy that they finally want something to do with you, but you know it’s only because you sent Joker to hell, something Bruce should’ve done years ago.
And when you heard that Tim was skipping the graduation ceremony to aid in patrolling? You immediately did a cartwheel down the hall. Not only will you finally be free from Gotham, but you won’t have to share the spotlight with Tim and risk catching their attention, though they probably would’ve had no idea who you were. Alfred tried to get Tim to reconsider getting Bruce to attend, but when those two are obsessing over something, it’s impossible to tear them away from it. The butler tried to tell Bruce that he had another son graduating, but the man left before the sentence could be complete, stating he had work to do.
At this point, it doesn’t even phase you. You know they’ve practically forgotten your existence and you couldn’t care less. You have everything you need to go back home and start your new life, you don’t need them for anything.
“Master Y/N, are you sure you don’t want me to call master Bruce and have him attend your graduation,” the butler fusses over your cap and gown for the umpteenth time. “As you father, he should be here to see one of the most important moments in your life.”
“It’s fine, Alfred, I don’t need him here. Frankly, with the way he’s acted over the years, I’m glad he’s not here. Same with Tim.”
The butler looks at you and you grimace at your remark. Ever since becoming the Megamycete’s host, you’ve noticed changes in your behavior. Where once you use to keep comments like that to yourself, you know say them in front of Alfred, unafraid for his reaction. Or how you use to always speak in a barely audible whisper for fear of being overheard by the Waynes, now you talk to Alfred at a volume that could easily attract unwanted attention. And you’re certain he’s noticed your change, too. God knows that man is aware of everything that goes on in his house.
(It is because you no longer have that fear. Before, you were a timid little thing, afraid of being seen by a predator lying in wait. Now? You are the hunter. They can’t hurt you anymore.)
Alfred opens his mouth to day something, but one of the teachers calls for all seniors to make their way to the field, signaling the beginning of the ceremony. He heads to the stands while you follow your fellow seniors to the field where you’re herded in alphabetical order. Once the teacher was satisfied with the order, she typed on her phone and the graduation music started playing from the speakers at the top of the stands.
As you follow in line, you look up to see Alfred in the front row, holding his phone up, no doubt intending to take several pictures and record just as many videos. You smile at the man, thankful to have him here on this important night. It’s then you think about your Momma and how she’d be cheering for you so hard, everyone could hear her. You feel something slide down your face and realize you’re crying. This is an important day in your life and you’re missing an important person in your life.
(She would be so proud of you. If your memories are anything indication of her character, she would give anything to be here right now. While the butler can never replace her, he is an acceptable stand-in.)
“Yeah,” you whisper as you take your seat near the front of the stage set up in the middle of the field. “He is. And I’m gonna miss him like hell.”
While you’re overjoyed to leave Gotham in your rear view and never step foot in it ever again, you’ll really miss Alfred. The man has been your rock since day one, celebrating your birthday which also happens to be the day of your Momma’s death. He held you while you cried and was your only company in the lonely halls of Wayne Manor.
Maybe you can hire him as your butler? Your smaller house would no doubt be much easier to clean than that behemoth of a mansion. Plus, Alfred is way more than people like the Waynes deserve.
After an eternity, the valedictorian finishes his speech and takes his place at up front, which is when the headmaster walks up to the podium and begins to call the students to come up and receive their diplomas. With each name called, you feel chest begin to tighten. This is the first time in years that so many eyes will be on you. What if you fall flat on your face while walking? Or try to shake the headmaster’s hand with your left instead of your right? Or—
(Relax,) the Megamycete says, bringing you out of your thoughts. (All will be fine. When your name is called, you will rise, walk with a level of pride none of your peers could ever hope to match, accept your diploma with such grace the headmaster will b in total awe, and walk back to your seat with the same pride as before. You are better than any of these children and you will make them know it.)
Hearing those words instantly makes you relax, your the knot that had been building up in your chest untangling, allowing you to breathe again.
“Thanks,” you say, taking a much needed deep breath. “Glad to know you think so highly of me.”
(We speak only the truth. We have seen the lives and memories of countless people over the past four centuries and not a single one holds a candle to you. You possess much potential and now that we are joined, we know you will unleash that potential and the entire world will be in awe of it.)
Wow. You actually have no idea how to respond to that.
(Pay attention, now. You will be called soon.)
It’s then you realize the headmaster is now on the Fs, almost to the Gs.
There’s three people ahead of you.
Then two.
Then one.
Then…
“Y/N Gould.”
This is it, your biggest moment in Gotham Academy. You stand up and walk with the grace the Megamycete said you would, accept your diploma from the headmaster with your left hand and shake with your right, and walk back to your seat. As you do, you see Alfred, a smile stretched across his face and cheering your name as he continues to hold his phone, probably recording a video just before your name was called.
(Excellent, Y/N,) the Megamycete praises as you sit back down. (We offer our most sincere congratulations on your triumph.)
You stare down at the piece of paper down in your hands and you while the evidence is right there in black and white, it still doesn’t feel real. You’re actually in awe of the fancy kind of paper Gotham Academy uses to print its diplomas, with its Coleen gilded edges, bold ink, beautiful calligraphy, and soft feel.
Hell, Alfred may fight you to keep it so he can frame it and mount it somewhere in Wayne Manor.
After that, the rest of the ceremony seems to speed up, the last of the names being called, the headmaster deeming all of you graduates of Gotham Academy, and the graduating class being told to gather behind the chairs for the moment every senior looks forward to: the Cap Throw. You follow your fellow graduates with bated breath, eager to throw your cap and complete your graduation experience.
“On three,” the valedictorian yells from the center of the crowd. “One! Two! Three!”
You eagerly toss your cap with everyone else, your cheers and laughs joining everyone else’s. You watch with joy as the caps soar above you all and begin to float back down to the field, your eyes tracking your cap, which you had decorated with paintings (the Megamycete allowing you to make them flawlessly) of the team you beat Cynthia from Pokémon Platinum with: Infernape, Luxray, Staraptor, Floatzel, Lucario, and Garchomp (you had no idea so many used the same team before you discovered the internet).
You collect you cap while so many try to find theirs and had towards the exit to meet Alfred.
“Congratulations, my boy,” he greets you, his wide smile still adorning his face, before bringing you into a tight hug.
“Than you, Alfred,” you respond, returning the hug.
When you separate, he flags down a passing man. “Pardon me, sir, would you be so kind as to take a picture of the two of us?”
“Sure,” the man says, taking his phone and aiming at you and taking the picture.
“Thank you, good sir,” the butler says as he takes his phone back.
He types on his phone and not even a second later, you feel your phone buzz in your pocket beneath your gown, indicating he sent you the picture.
“I’m so proud of you, Master Y/N. You’ve certainly earned this.”
“Thank you, Alfred. And not just for this, but for everything.”
You two leave the field and he follows you to the gym so you can return your gown and once you do, you two make your way to your car, which is when you realize this is the part of the evening where you two say your goodbyes and you leave for Goodsprings while he returns to Wayne Manor. And the sweet moment you’ve been waiting years for now turns bittersweet. You’ve looked forward to this moment ever since you started high school and while you’re ecstatic to finally leave this godforsaken city, you hate that you have to leave Alfred behind.
“Master Y/N,” he says, breaking the tense silence. “I know you’ve been waiting for this moment for so long, but do you have to leave right now? Maybe your return to Nevada can wait until morning? You really shouldn’t be driving so late.”
“We can put it off for as long as we want, still won’t change the outcome.”
“I know,” the poor man sighs. “But still, it’s over forty hours from here to Goodsprings.”
“I’ll be fine, Alfred. Really. I’ll be super careful. I’ll stop at a motel a few hours from here, take regular breaks, stop at restaurants to eat, and I’ll be there before you know it and in one piece.”
“I just wish I could convince you to stay. I’ll miss you, terribly. The manor won’t be the same without you.”
“I’ll miss you, too, Alfred.”
You two pull each other into another hug.
“Promise me that you’ll call me if you run into any trouble, be it on the road or in Nevada.”
“I will.”
“And that you’ll try to visit whenever you can. I’ll arrange for Master Bruce’s jet to come and get you, you just say the word.”
“I’ll try.”
You’re lying. You’re lying and both of you know it. But, neither of you bring it up.
“And promise me you’ll take care of yourself. I didn’t raise you for over ten years just for you to end up in the hospital just because you didn’t feed yourself.”
“I will,” you laugh. You know he’s joking, he taught you everything he knows about cooking, cleaning, and housekeeping. That, combined with the Megamycete’s records, you have everything you need to keep your house together.
“I just wish your father and siblings were here.” You just did manage to fight off the flinch at the mention of those assholes. “This is an important moment of your life and they should be here to celebrate it with you.”
“I know you do, Alfred,” you respond, thankful that you’re still hugging so he can’t see the face you’re making at the thought of them being here, insulting you and making you feel like graduating somehow made you feel like a failure.
Finally, you two pull apart and with one last goodbye and promise to be careful, you get into your car, the backseat covered by boxes that couldn’t be placed in the trunk. When you woke up this morning, you packed your computer, video games, books, and other things that you refused to leave behind at Wayne Manor, your Momma’s pen sitting in your pocket as you refused to part with it. Sure, there were some things were left behind and while Alfred told you repeatedly he could arrange for them to be delivered to your house, you told him that anything you left behind wasn’t important and could be thrown away.
You didn’t leave much behind, some stuff like a few books you hadn’t read in years, a bunch of notebook paper with stupid ideas for video games that you had years and threw away when you realized no one in their right mind would play them, and an old journal you kept when you first move to Gotham. You archived every major event leading up to Damian’s arrival in those pages, which is when you finally filled it up. You briefly thought about keeping it, but decided against it. You had your stay at Wayne Manor burned into your memory and weren’t eager to have been more reminders around you. Plus, you’re about to start your new life, so there’s no need to carry it around. Maybe you can start keeping a new journal?
You start up your car, put it into reverse, and when you backed up enough, put it into drive and wave at Alfred as you leave the parking lot and follow your GPS to Goodsprings. That’s when your phone finally connects to your radio and starts playing music, Hollow from FFVII Remake, playing at just the right volume.
“Wow,” you chuckle as the music begins. “Talk about great timing.”
(We agree. This song is about heading into the unknown with hope; perfect for the start of your new life. It is as if fate itself is smiling down upon you.)
“Seems like it. You with me, buddy?”
(Every step of the way. Until the very end.)
And with that, you pick up speed as you get onto the interstate.
Alfred watches you drive off and only when you’re out of sight does he finally shed a tear. To see Master Y/N leave is one of the most difficult moments of his life.
He understands, of course. Not only did you leave much behind after the tragic and unexpected loss of your mother, but Master Wayne and the children had given you zero reasons to stay. In fact, they’d given you a million reasons to leave.
But he can’t let you go. Not his favorite member of the family.
He’d never admit it to anyone, but out of everyone in the Wayne Family, he cared for you the most. You were raised by a wonderful, loving woman who knew how to properly raise a child and didn’t skulk about at night, battling with criminals night after night. You had a normal life and knew what life was like outside of being a vigilante, bringing a much needed balance to the manor.
You were a delight to raise, always saying please and thank you, offering to help around the manor, and carrying on pleasant conversations that were the highlight of his day. And if the family would take the time to get to know you, they’d come to the same conclusion he did many years ago.
However, as brilliant as everyone in the family is, they can also be equally foolish. Too wrapped up in their civilian and vigilante lives to see the gift they had been given, but spurred for years. And now, you’re gone.
But not for long. You belong here, with your family, and by God he’ll make sure you know it, your father knows it, and your siblings know it. One way or another, he’ll bring your father to his senses, and when that day comes, he’ll make him go to you and beg for your forgiveness, even if he has to get on his hands and knees. And after that, your father will bring you back home, where you’ll be lavished in the love they should’ve shown you from the beginning.
He’ll do whatever it takes to bring you back home, where you belong. He doesn’t care what he has to do or how long it takes, he’ll make sure you come back to the place where you belong. And when you, you’ll be showered with so much love that you’ll never want to leave ever again.
A/N: I got lucky this week. I was going to have 4 tests this week (2 regular tests and 2 midterms), but a professor I have for two classes got sick and cancelled, pushing the tests for next Monday and Tuesday. With only one midterm left and a study guide basically matching the test, I had plenty of free time to make this chapter. Hope you all enjoyed it!
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The Commune
Cult Leader!Aemond x Niece!Reader
Summary: A modern AU where Aemond, power-hungry and high on hubris, is the leader of a commune with a peculiar affection for the Seven.
Warnings: 18+, dark themes (mind the tags!), AFAB reader, depictions of depression, manipulation, coercion, dubcon/noncon, targcest (no description of appearance), fingering, oral (m. and f. receiving), facefucking, humiliation, (noncon) spanking, semi-public sex, P in V, breeding kink
Word Count: 19k
A/N: I've wanted to edit this for a while and finally got around to it! It took all week 🫠 I definitely feel like the fic got a face-lift! Enjoy ✨
Leaving
Your heart is beating fast and hard when you wake up.
The shrill sound of your alarm clock does little to ease your tense state, abruptly ruining the quiet calm that had previously occupied your bedroom. Without fully opening your eyes, you reach for its usual spot on the nightstand and press snooze, hoping for a little more serenity before you have to get up and face yet another insufferable day at work.
How could such a dull job cause you so much stress?
Why did it make you wake up each night with a heavy swirl of dread and anxiety tightening in your chest, rendering you unable to fall back asleep?
You’ve never been this tired before, yet you’ve never found sleep harder to obtain.
With a sigh you push yourself out of the warm comfort of your bed. It is so soft and smells like home; laundry detergent and the scented candle you keep on the nightstand.
The forced separation almost makes you cry as your body shivers in your chill bedroom.
Each day as heavy to bear as the next.
You grab the robe you have hanging on the back of the bedroom door and head for the kitchen with slow, heavy steps; dragging your feet behind you.
When had life turned so monotone?
When was the last time you truly enjoyed yourself without thinking about work?
Why did you find yourself in an existential crisis before you’d even had your morning coffee?
You load the small coffee maker, pull out a carton of yoghurt and dump some into a bowl before reaching for the packet of granola standing on top of your fridge.
You grab a mug, pour some coffee into it, and shake up your oat milk before adding a splash.
Same fucking breakfast each day.
Moving to the living room, you curl into yourself on your sofa, turning on the same morning show you always watch as you sip your coffee and feel a tiny bit of relief at the comfort that the warm liquid offers as it slides down your throat.
The unnaturally cheery hosts on TV are in the middle of some segment about reusing egg cartons when your phone vibrates. You already know who it is, tapping on the screen to see “mum” and her usual morning text, asking you how you're feeling and what you have planned for the day.
It's harder to pretend like everything's fine when it's her asking. She can always tell that you're faking it; that whatever you say is just an empty, repetitive attempt at assuring her that you are fine.
You don't really mean any of it.
And she knows.
You shoot her a quick reply, trying to ease her worries but not really having the energy to fully commit,
“I’m good, going to work and meeting up with Sara after”
A small lie, though you are planning on sending a text to see if Sara's available later. Regrettably, your weekly dinners had been reduced to monthly ones, but still.
Do it for mum.
“Have you finished checking the reports I asked you to look over?”
Gwayne does not even spare you a glance as he comes up to your desk in the office, eyes glued to his phone and thumbs violently tapping the screen. He wasn’t the worst boss to have, but he certainly wasn’t nice or understanding either, promptly ignoring any signs of distress you were showing. You know you have been looking worse and worse as the stress of the job has settled in; skin going duller and bags under your eyes becoming more prominent. Yet, he stubbornly says nothing, relying on you to finish work swiftly without ever talking back or asking for some guidance.
“Yes, I just have to glance them over one last time before I forward them to you”, you answer, noticing how tedious your voice has become.
He hums, eyes still on his phone,
“And then I’ll need you to double-check that you’ve replied to any urgent emails before going home today. Would really fuck up my schedule next week if I’d have to keep track of your inbox as well”
“Yes, sure”, you reply before even taking in what Gwayne had told you,
“Wait, what do you mean? Next week?”, you question, seeing him briefly scrunch his eyebrows together before finally looking up from his phone, locking eyes with you,
“Yes, you have next week off, remember? Last chance to use up those paid days off you’ve accumulated, and the union has made it quite clear that we cannot give you a bonus instead”, he rolls his eyes at the last part.
“Week off? But I have meetings lined up next week, deadlines closing in”
Despite knowing that you probably need the break, you feel the familiar tightening in your chest as you consider all tasks you were planning on doing next week.
Gwayne, seeming to be done with the conversation, turns and walks away from your desk, eyes again locked on his phone as he replies, “Then you’ll just have to get it sorted today”
“Well that’s lovely, sweetheart!”
Rhaenyra’s voice sounds relieved when you tell her the news of your unplanned week off. You had been forced to stay at the office for two additional hours just to make sure that you finished up any urgent business, resulting in you cancelling the dinner plans you'd made with Sara and consequently spending another evening by yourself at home.
“Why don’t you get away for a bit? You might enjoy a change of scenery?”, she asks.
You were too exhausted to even think about planning and booking a trip, replying “Yeah, sure” dispassionately as you stir the pot of pasta cooking on the stove.
All you want to do is lay in bed, listen to music and try as best as you can to turn your brain off; to not think about anything.
Contently brainless.
You don't want to think about how you’d gotten your dream job, just to realise that you despise it.
You don't want to think about how every day felt like a repetition of the one before, nothing exciting ever happening.
You don't want to think about the strong suspicion you have that every fucking choice you’ve ever made has lead you to a life that you detest.
“Why don’t you go visit Helaena? I know she’s misses you”, your mothers voice pulls you away from the negative thoughts spiralling in your head,
“I think the place is about two hours by train from Oldtown, out in the country. Maybe some fresh air would do you good?”
You knew Helaena had moved out to the country about a year ago, exhausted and overstimulated from the suffocating drain of the fast-paced city that King’s Landing is. She’d sent you a letter, not a text or a call, some time ago to let you know that she was okay and she’d love it if you came by to visit her.
“Mm, I do miss her…”, you mumble into your phone, thinking of the last time you’d seen her. It was Aegon’s birthday almost one and a half years ago. She’d seemed lost and sad. Like she often did.
Like you often did, nowadays.
“Yeah, maybe that’d do me some good”, you finally agree, hearing Rhaenyra let out a sigh of relief at your words. You know she's worried you’d stay home all week, doing nothing but dwelling in sadness.
“That’s lovely, dear! I’m sure she’ll be ecstatic to see you. You know Aemond lives there too, right?"
You’d heard that Aemond had left King’s Landing shortly after finishing his PhD as well. You’d been with your mum when Alicent called her, filled to the brim with worry over her overachieving son turning down a position at Oldtown University in order to move out to the middle of nowhere, claiming that he’d be "conducting private research".
You had actually been excited for him to move to Oldtown. Having some family close by would’ve been a nice escape from the loneliness of the city.
Besides, you and Aemond had drifted apart as you both grew older, despite being thick as thieves in your childhood.
Maybe it’d be nice to see him too.
You lean your head against the train window, watching the city landscape make way for the lush greenery of the Reach in late summer.
Being trapped in the city you’d almost forgotten how beautiful it was here; a stark difference from Dragonstone, where you’d spent most of your upbringing.
It's not that you don't miss the sea. As a child, you'd loved the way the harsh, salty winds whipped at your face, leaving you wet and impossibly refreshed as you stared out towards the horizon, thinking of everything awaiting you there.
The potential of what your life could've become felt a lot more comforting than the reality of it.
You hadn't been able to call Helaena to inform her that you’d like to visit. Apparently, she didn’t have a mobile phone anymore, but after sending a text to Alicent you’d gotten a hold of her new number; a landline.
You didn’t know how she managed without a smartphone, but figured that the stress of constant notifications might have made her decide to ditch it.
Grabbing your bag from between your legs, your hand rummages through it in blind search for your pocket mirror.
You pull it out, open it and check your reflection.
Still the same tired face, with dark bags permanently residing under your eyes. You hadn’t slept well last night either, despite having some much needed rest from work.
Why was your body seemingly incapable of relaxing?
You feel around for some concealer, dotting a bit on your finger and patting it under your eye; a useless attempt at hiding the fatigue prevalent on your face.
Defeated, you lean back in your seat.
The train ride's nice. You spend the entire 2 hours and 12 minutes listening to music, watching the scenery flash by.
Thoroughly zoned out, you nearly miss the conductor announcing your station.
You hastily grab your bag and rush out of the door. The station, if you could even call it that, is small; just two tracks going opposite directions.
It's closer to a bus stop, a place where people get off and quickly make way to their final destination.
You spot Helaena immediately. She's standing on the platform in a lilac summer dress, her silver hair shining in the sunlight.
Although you can only really make out her silhouette, she seems different. As you come closer, the wide smile that she sports comes into view.
Gosh, she looks radiant!
So different from her gloomy, distant self back in King’s Landing.
“I’m so happy you’re here!”, she squeals, wrapping you in her arms.
She hugs you tightly, and you hug her back, burying your nose in her hair. It feels good to hug someone you care for.
When was the last time you did that?
“Thank you for having me”, you respond as Helaena pulls away, still holding you in her arms, eyes flickering over your face.
Her smile falters for a second before it returns and she starts talking excitedly about her new home, telling you that it’s only a 20 minute walk from the station and you could catch up on the way.
You follow her down the steps from the platform, answering a few questions about work and your life in Oldtown.
She leads you away from the small station, down a path where a few houses lay scattered sporadically.
You can hardly call this a town; far too minuscule. Still, you notice what seems to be a little supermarket, a pharmacy, a gas station and what looks like an elementary school, facing the tiny town square.
“I’ve been hoping you’d come visit ever since I sent you that letter”, Helaena gushes, taking your hand in hers as she led you down a small path going off the main road,
“I just know you’ll love our commune. Aemond thinks so too!”, she continues while squeezing your hand in hers.
“Commune?”, you ask and turn to face her.
She met your eyes and nods, face breaking out into a wide grin once again,
“Yes, Aemond’s research project! You know he specialised in philosophy when he did his PhD in Political Science, right? Well, he got really into the idea of having people live in smaller communities instead of the impersonal and detached lifestyles people pursue in modern cities”, she explains, eyes once again inspecting your face, only to land on the bags under your eyes.
You hum in response, seeing if she’ll continue.
“So, he used some of the money he had stored away in funds and created our commune; a small community where everyone knows each other and we get away from the stresses of city life. We grow our own crops, spend time outside and work together to keep the place running”, she explains, eyes gleaming with adoration,
“He said he did it for me, since he saw how bad my depression had gotten back in King’s Landing”, she adds, and you squeeze her hand affectionately. Aemond had always cared for Helaena, no one else seemed to truly understand her like he did.
“So, you feeling better now? Out here?”, you inquire, gesturing towards the green field you walk through, hand in hand.
You're not really paying attention to where you're going as Helaena guides you. Looking up, you find yourself surrounded by nature; not a building in sight.
The sun shines brightly, illuminating the beech trees towering over you, creating a roof of light green luminance.
“Yes, much better”, she replies with a smile. She seems so at peace here, encapsulating a kind of beauty that comes from within and hypnotises anyone laying eyes on her.
“And this, ehm, commune. How many people live there now?”, you ask, not knowing you’d be spending your time with a bunch of strangers.
Truth be told, you really didn’t feel up for it.
You barely have energy to hang out with Helaena and Aemond. Entertaining and getting to know new people would be especially draining.
“We’re already about 50 people. Most of them met Aemond when he was still in school”, she replies.
As if she could sense your uneasiness, her eyes search yours as she adds, “You’ll love them, I swear! Everyone’s super nice”
Together, you continue your path, walking up a small hill. As you look down, the commune comes into view.
You see small, cottage-looking houses, with large flowerbeds between them, filled with everything from herbs to vegetables.
There's a large building the middle of the field with walls much taller than the cottages. The building's made out of wood; a dark tone that contrasts against the light trees and green fields you’d passed on the way over.
Above the large entrance of the building is a large carving, resembling the seven-pointed star of the Faith.
Helaena, still excitedly chatting next to you about how lovely life is out in the country, pulls you towards the large building in quick steps,
“Aemond's dying to meet you! It’s been so long. I bet he’s in the Sept”, she explains, leading you through the tall, open door.
Your parents aren't particularly religious, which means you hadn’t spent much time in Septs and the like. Alicent’s family, however, were rather devoted; an integral part of the many faith's many fractions in Oldtown.
When you were younger, both Helaena and Aemond had spent a lot of time studying The Seven-Pointed Star. Still, the fact that they'd chosen to construct a Sept in such a small community shocks you.
Maybe they're more dedicated than you’d thought?
Entering the Sept, you recognise the back of a tall man with broad shoulders, a narrow waist, and long, silvery hair, tied in a low bun.
Helaena calls his name and he turns around, finding your gaze in an instant. His lone, purple eye crinkles slightly as he smiles at you, calling out your name in greeting.
Just like Helaena, he looks radiant; pale skin glowing, dress shirt and dark slacks perfectly ironed, and not a hair out of place.
As a child he was always so moody; volatile and sensitive.
Now, he seems so calm.
Too calm.
Like he was faking it.
“Welcome to our home. I hope the trip here wasn’t too draining?”, he asks, inspecting your fatigued face.
Seven hells, did everyone think you looked like the walking dead?
“It was a lovely ride out here. I’d almost forgotten how beautiful the country is” you answer, trying your best to sound cheerier than you look.
He hums at your answer, placing a hand on your shoulder, squeezing lightly. You can't make out if it's supposed to be an attempt at a greeting, or a way to comfort you.
His eye bores into yours,
“We’re so happy to finally have you here. Helaena will help you get sorted in one of our rooms and then I’ll introduce you to everyone”
His hand swiftly leaves your shoulder before he turns around, striding out of the large wooden doors of the Sept.
Reconnecting
After a few hasty greetings, you retreat to the room Helaena and Aemond have assigned to you.
You're exhausted from being bombarded with impressions, and collapse on your bed, finding uninterrupted sleep for the first time in months.
Hours later, you wake up to the sun illuminating your room, a low knocking sound by your door.
As your groggy mind slowly realises where you are, you hear Helaena call you from the outside, informing you that breakfast will be served in a few minutes.
You get up and move to the basin placed in the corner of your room, splashing some water on your face, checking your sleepy reflection.
You instantly notice that the heavy bags that had seemed to be a permanent feature under your eyes have faded slightly, and you look better and brighter than you had in a long time.
Mood elevated, you move to throw on a flowy, knee-length skirt and a linen blouse, reasoning that something loose-fitting would match the sunny, late-summer climate.
Stepping outside, the air is crisp.
The sun provides warmth as it makes contact with your skin, a welcomed relief to the slight chill still lingering.
You notice that the residents of the small community have gathered by a long, wooden table placed in the middle of a field not far away from where you stand. You quickly make your way there, spotting Helaena. Her eyes light up as she sees you approach, greeting you with a wide smile,
“We always have breakfast together”, she explains as people move around you swiftly, placing plates of bread, yoghurt, pastries, fresh fruit and vegetables on the massive table.
You spot Aemond, hands behind his back and posture straigh as he observes the people scurrying around him. He glances at you, giving you a small smile and a nod before he returns to his previously stoic state, observing the residents while they prepare for breakfast.
Helaena reappears next to you, arms wrapped around 5 glass vases filled with wildflowers. You help her place them on the table, admiring how utterly beautiful the set up looks.
The commune, as you'd heard one resident call it, has a simplistic aesthetic. Most rooms are only occupied by whatever furniture’s necessary to maximise functionality; tables, chairs and beds made out of wood, decorated with nature-toned linens.
Yet, there is a beauty to it you’d hardly seen before; an appreciation for a simple charm that's often lost in the hectic mess of cities like Oldtown or King’s Landing.
You take a seat next to Helaena, eager to devour the delicious-looking food in front of you.
Though most residents are seated by now, no one moves to touch the various plates filled to the brim with mouth-watering food.
You look over at the end of the long table and notice Aemond standing, hands still clasped behind his back. He softly clears his throat, and the cheery chatter dissolves in an instance, all eyes shifting to watch the tall, silver-haired man standing before them,
“Good morning. I hope you all slept well and feel ready for a day of prosperity”, Aemond starts, eye moving across the table to acknowledge everyone present.
Most of the residents are older than both you and Aemond. You even heard that a handful of them used to be his professors back in King’s Landing.
You're still not sure how he’d managed to get them all to move out here, but as he speaks, you notice how intensely everyone observes him, taking in every word that leaves his lips,
“Let us pray”, he orders, and each one of your tablemates bring their hands up to clasp over their empty plates before closing their eyes.
Aemond sends you a look you can’t really decipher. You assume he wants you to partake in the prayer, so you lower your head and clasp your hands together as well.
Aemond pays tribute to all seven faces of the new God before thanking all residents for attending, voice calm and steady.
As the prayers end, everyone shifts their focus to the food. You feel unsure of what to try; everything looks so good.
Helaena makes the decision for you, grabbing your plate, loading it with bread and various spreads and toppings for you to try.
“You’ll love this”, she urges as she places the plate in front of you, lilac eyes eagerly awaiting your reaction.
She's right. Everything tastes divine and you eat until you feel like your stomach is about to burst.
Meanwhile, you try to engage in some small-talk with the people sitting closest to you around the massive table.
To your right sits Jayne, a woman you’d guess to be in her early fifties, with sun-kissed skin and kind, brown eyes. She tells you about her tasks at here, mainly growing herbs and flowers.
She shoots a quick glance at a dark-haired woman sitting by Aemond further down the table, explaining that she grows and tends to various plants which are grown at the request of the woman she’s observing; Alys.
After breakfast you offer to help collect and wash up the dishes, feeling a strong need to be useful as you see all residents retreat to their respective tasks for the day.
As you circle the outside table with an already overfilled tray in your hands, you spot a tall figure appear beside you.
“Would you like to go for a walk?”
You look to the side and see Aemond standing there. He's wearing a dress shirt and dark slacks today as well, though his hair is left untied, cascading down his shoulders and reflecting the light of the sun.
He offers you a timid smile as he asks, mimicking the way he used to look when he was younger. It's a stark contrast to how he appeared during breakfast; authoritative and intimidating.
You return his smile and nod. Perhaps a walk would do you good.
He instructs one of the residents to take over your work and they do so without protest. You send them an apologetic look and mumble a "thank you" as you follow Aemond, who’s already set sight on the small path leading away from the settlement and towards the compact trees of the surrounding forest.
The two of you walk in silence, basking in the lovely scenery surrounding you. The light green trees seem to shimmer in the sun, and as you make your way into the forest, you spot a small river; surface reflecting the lush greenery of the leaves.
“How is life in Oldtown? Has my uncle been giving you a hard time?”, Aemond asks, eye looking forward as he breaks the silence.
You swallow and mentally prepare yourself before answering, not wanting to let him in on how miserable you’ve been.
“Yeah it’s been interesting. A lot of new challenges but I’m hanging in there”, you answer, and despite your attempt at sounding casual, the sadness residing within you drips through and stains your voice.
Aemond abruptly halts and turns to you, eye boring into yours as he contemplatively licks his lips.
“There's no need for that here”, he states, voice suddenly sterner than before.
“What do you mean?”
Your cheeks grow hot and your palms feel clammy as you grow embarrassed over how easily he sees through your fake cheeriness.
“You don’t need to lie to me. It’s only us here, I won’t judge you”, he replies, maintaining the intense eye contact between the two of you.
It feels like a dam bursts within you; a force so strong you're helpless to it, and your sight turns blurry.
Any attempts you’ve made to appear strong have failed and all that is left is the truth; that you'r stuck in a permanent state of misery.
Broken.
You feel your throat close up and you desperately try to swallow before answering,
“I ha-, have been feeling a bit, ehm, lost”, you admit, and as you finally utter the words, admitting to yourself and confiding in him that you feel disoriented, tears spill out of the corners of your eyes.
You try to take deep breaths to soothe yourself and regain some control over your emotions, but it's too hard.
Why can’t you pull yourself together?
Aemond regards you for a moment, allowing you time to process the sudden crash of emotions overcoming you, before he places a hand on your upper arm, gently dragging his fingers over the fabric of your blouse.
“You’re allowed to feel lost”, he looks into your eyes and there is something there; a tenderness you haven’t seen since you were both much younger.
You can’t stop the tears from flowing anymore as you weakly nod at his words, the lump in your throat leaving you unable to properly answer him. His seeing eye is so gentle as it gazes into yours,
“Many of us here felt lost, hopeless even. But the community we’ve built allowed us to reconnect with our inner selves; helped us feel happier”
He moves the hand that had been on your arm to your face, experimentally stroking your cheek. You lean into his touch by reflex, relishing in the feeling of his warm hand on your wet cheek.
“You don’t have to pretend here, not with me”
As he speaks you move closer to him, pressing your body against his and wrapping your arms around his torso, hugging him tightly, just like you did so many times in your childhood.
He understands what you need and hugs you back, holding you against his chest, softly stroking your hair. And despite the agony in your chest and the lump in your throat, you feel okay; escaping into his warm embrace to momentarily forget all your sorrows.
You stay like that for a while, bodies interlocked with each other as Aemond lets you cry. He doesn't say anything, continuously stroking your hair. It feels emancipating; crying your heart out in the arms of your uncle.
As your tears dry, you gently push yourself away from Aemond’s embrace and run the back of your hand over your cheeks in an attempt to remove some of the wetness. Aemond’s eye still looks gentle as he regards you,
“I know that life's not always what you thought it’d be, and leaving home is scary. But you’re with family now. Me and Hel are so pleased that you’re here with us”
You smile at him, saying a quiet "thank you" as he motions for you to carry on with your walk.
You continue to talk and catch up on what’s been going on in your lives since you last met.
Aemond tells you about his research project; how he believes that modern capitalism renders people mere objects utilised for profit by companies, consequently leaving them lacking agency and without a belief in higher powers, generating a generation of depressed, lost souls.
You take in everything he says. He speaks with such confidence that you feel yourself agreeing instantaneously.
In truth, you also felt like an object at work; a machine there to execute tasks, without any possibility to change your condition.
You listen to him talk so intensively you don't even realise you’re back at the residence.
What sounds like a fight in hushed voices pulls you away from your conversation with Aemond as you look up to search for where the voices are coming from.
You see one of the residents you had breakfast with, Jayne, kneel down in front of Alys, grasping at her apron and pleading to her in a quiet, desperate voice,
“I didn't mean to, please believe me!”
Shocked, you look over at Aemond who suddenly looks stern, wrinkles forming between his eyebrows. His eye's set on the scene in front of you, yet he does not intervene.
As you open your mouth to ask him what's going on, he grabs your arm and promptly leads you into the Sept, closing the door behind you.
“Helaena will meet you here, she wanted to show you her insect farm. Do not leave until she collects you”, he commands, voice stoic but intimidating, leaving no room for argument.
Before you have a chance to reply he quickly opens the door, and leaves.
You spend the afternoon with Helaena, exploring her insect farm and listening to her tell you of all the benefits the farm provides.
Afterwards, you still feel the unease from earlier vibrate within you, causing you to feel restless. In an attempt to be useful, you offer to help some of the residents as they prepare the large outdoor dining space for supper.
You chat with one of the younger people there, a man who appears to be in his early 20’s called Jon.
He tells you about how he met Aemond. As part of his PhD programme, Aemond held some lectures for first-year students, and Jon had attended his class on international conflict and crisis.
They’d started talking outside of Aemond’s lectures and found that they had much in common, especially in regards to their view of the world, and what was wrong with it. Aemond had mentioned his wish to move out of the city with his sister, and Jon was intrigued in an instance.
You continue your conversation with Jon, finding him easy to chat with. He's surprisingly funny too, joking and making you laugh, easing your anxiety. Feeling yourself relax and grow more comfortable, you decide to pry a bit, confiding in Jon,
“I wasn’t brought up with the faith, so I have to ask. Why did you decide to build a large Sept in a small settlement like this?”, you ask as you help Jon place cutlery by the plates on the table.
His relaxed and cheerful demeanour stiffens at your question. His eyes leave the silverware on the table to meet yours,
“You don’t know?”
His face appears genuinely surprised, and his eyes are wide in question. Before you get a chance to answer, a raspy voice interrupts your conversation,
“Jon! How lovely of you to entertain our guest”
The woman who you’ve learned goes by Alys appears, emerald eyes locking with yours as you turn to meet her.
“I’m Alys, it is so nice to meet you”
She stretches out a hand and gives you a practised smile. Her features looks pleasant; far from how harsh they'd appeared when Jayne had been kneeling before her.
You try to smile back at her and tell her your name, though you suspect she already knows exactly who you are. You look over at Jon who appears nervous, hands fidgeting with a fork.
“I believe Aemond wants to see you, in his office”, Alys sight does not leave Jon, eyes boring into him, but you both know she is addressing you.
You can’t come up with anything to say or do; anxious to find out what it is that Aemond wants from you and desperate to get away from the intense, silent fight between Jon and Alys taking place before your eyes.
You shoot Jon a quick apologetic glance before moving toward the Sept, leaving him with Alys.
Aemonds office is located behind the large altar in the Sept. As you approach, you feel yourself grow tenser; stiffer.
You quickly try to run your sweaty palms over your skirt before raising one hand and softly tapping your knuckles against the heavy wood.
Aemond calls for you to come in and you enter, standing awkwardly by the door.
What does he want with you?
Had you overstepped when you spoke with Jon?
Or will he let you in on what had happened between Alys and Jayne when you came back from your walk?
Something about this place and Aemond makes you unexplainably uneasy, but you're unable to pin-point what it is that reduces you to a mess of nerves.
Your eyes keep flicking up at Aemond and down at the floor. You can't maintain eye contact with him, his stare too intense.
Fiery.
“I heard you offered to help Jon prepare supper?”, he inquires. His voice is completely devoid of any emotions, making your uneasiness grow.
He had an eerie calmness to him that did little to soothe you; rather, it made you grow even more restless.
“Y-, yes, well, I only helped him with bringing out plates and such”, you rushedly explain, words pouring out of your mouth, “I'm so sorry if I overstepped or made a mistake, that wasn’t my intention”
Aemond beckons you over, pushing his chair from where it’s placed by the desk, holding out his hand. You grab it without a second thought and he begins stroking his thumb over the back of your palm, looking up at you, a sliver of sympathy evident in his dark gaze,
“Why did you assist him?”, he asks softly and you answer that you just wanted to be helpful; that it feels strange seeing everyone else work hard and not contribute.
Aemond hums and leans back in his chair, hand still holding yours.
“You shouldn’t do other peoples chores for them. Everyone here has responsibilities that they should conduct in solitude”, he explains and you nod, though you can’t understand the harm in helping someone with a menial task like setting the table for supper.
“Don’t worry, no one is upset with you”, he adds to reassure you that you haven’t wronged anyone. You feel yourself relax somewhat, letting out a breath you didn’t realise you were holding.
Aemond looks you over and his gaze stops at your shoulders, noticing the strain there,
“You are still so tense”, he notes and you hum.
Stress, working at a desk for over 40 hours per week and lack of sleep had left your body in a constant, rigid state.
“Come here”, he commands and tugs at your arm unexpectedly, making you stumble forward. His other hand comes up to wrap around your waist, placing you on his thigh.
He looks into your eyes and the close proximity makes you slightly uncomfortable.
“You’ve always been so nervous; anxious since we were young”, he says as the hand that had been holding yours travels down to rest on your clothed thigh. The arm he has around you midriff tightens as if he’s expecting you to move away,
“Let me help you relax”, he offers, voice soft.
With gentle fingers, he slowly traces patterns on your leg. You do not know what he means by helping you, but you trust him.
He managed to makes you feel better before.
You stay put on his lap and he takes that as permission to continue, letting his hand travel down to where your skirt ends, fingers caressing your knee.
A breath gets caught in your throat as his hand moves upwards, slinking in under the fabric of your skirt; warm palm softly touching the smooth skin of your thigh. Aemond lets out a sigh at the contact and you suddenly feel uneasy, squirming in his grip.
“Aemond, what are you doing?”, you ask, voice slightly panicked.
His arm tightens around your waist as you try to move, hand continuing its path up your skirt.
“Didn’t it feel liberating to ease the pressure within when you cried in my arms earlier?”, he inquires and you look at him puzzled.
He still appears stoic but the pupil of his eye is blown wide; enveloping his iris.
“Let me take care of you. Just relax”, he commands as his hand reaches the apex of your thighs, index finger coming up to touch your bundle of nerves over your underwear experimentally.
You gasp and try to squirm out of his hold again, but he is much stronger; body rigid as he holds you.
He moves his head down to rest in the crock of your neck, shushing your protests. His fingers continue their slow massage over your underwear, and you feel yourself grow wetter from his attention.
Both your mind and your body have frozen.
Although you know it’s wrong, you let yourself lean into the pleasure Aemond is providing you, feeling yourself drift away; mind letting go of your senses as Aemond's touch consumes you.
When his fingers travel to the edge of your underwear, sliding inside, it’s like a bucket of cold water is poured over you.
You regain consciousness, bringing your hand up to try and push his away,
“Aemond we can’t do this, don’t-”, you plea, embarrassed by the fact that you can feel the evidential stickiness of your arousal between your legs.
Aemond tuts at you and pushes his fingers to make contact with the skin of your cunt, delighted at the wetness that greets him,
“You want this", he speaks quietly into your neck, "You need this. Be a good girl for me and let it happen”
You sit in his lap stiffly and as you're about to protest once more, his fingers circle your clit, causing a startled moan to slip out of your disobliging mouth.
Aemond chuckles against your skin and presses a light kiss to your neck,
“I knew you’d like it”
His words feel taunting, and your cheeks sear with shame.
The conflicting feelings storming inside you do little to hinder the arousal you're experiencing.
As his fingers travel down to your entrance, you again feel your common sense slip away and pleasure overtaking you.
He gathers some of the wetness from your entrance and brings it back up to your clit, making you sigh in involuntary pleasure again.
He positions his hand so that the heel of his palm is right by your bundle of nerves, leaving his fingers free to tease your entrance. He stays like that for a while, teasing you while pressing his palm against your clit.
The pleasure builds inside of you at a rapid pace.
He slowly sinks two fingers inside and you cannot contain the loud moan that escapes you, grabbing his arm with both hands. You grip him tightly, but cannot bring yourself to pry his hand away like you’d tried before, the pleasure too overpowering.
He sets a steady pace, palm pushing against your clit and fingers continuously finding that spot within you that causes your thighs to shake.
Your breath grows heavy, pleasure tightening inside you rapidly, and suddenly you don't want him to stop.
You hear Aemond’s breath growing laboured against your neck as well, giving it his all as he holds you in place and pleasures you.
You bite your lip to not let more moans slip out as pleasure begins to consume you.
Why did it feel so good?
Your walls began to contract against Aemond’s fingers as your peak approaches, and distantly, you hear him encourage you to let go.
As you do, you let out a pleasured cry, soaking his fingers. Your body stiffens while pleasure shoots through you; traveling from your lower stomach to your chest and down your limbs.
Your body slumps against Aemond, who moves his face out from the crook of your neck, lips ghosting over the shell of your ear as he whispers,
“Good girl”
Assimilating
You can’t take in anything Helaena is saying.
You watch her lips move, try your hardest to take in her words, but nothing sticks. You hum and nod in reply, but haven’t got a clue to what you just agreed.
Should you tell her about what happened in Aemond’s office?
What if she tells him?
What if she tells mum?
Bile rises in the back of your throat at the thought.
What if your mum found out what her brother had done with her daughter?
What if she found out how good he’d made you feel?
That you liked it.
The only consolation to your misery is the fact that Aemond is sitting where he’d sat before, at the end of the long, beautifully decorated wooden table, looking out at everyone as if nothing was wrong. Like this was any other supper.
Maybe nothing was wrong?
Maybe you'd just imagined the entire thing?
Still, you can't bear to meet his gaze. You continue to channel all of your energy into the conversation you were having with Helaena. Or rather, that she was having with you.
“So when the queen bee dies, her workers will select a new queen from the larva and feed her this special thing called ‘royal jelly’ to make her fertile”, she cheerily says, smiling from ear to ear,
“Everyone here in our community gets to focus their attention on their chosen topic of interest, mine being insects and biology. I’ve learned so much, nature is truly fascinating”
Again, you notice how elated Helaena seems to be here. Her eyes shine as she continues to tell you about her life in the country, tending to insect farms.
It's hard to imagine that this is the same girl who’d been a shell of a person before.
As children, she had developed a tendency to pull away from others, choosing to fold into herself and push the world around her away.
Seeing her this animated and filled with life should make you happy for her.
But it feels off.
The following days go by quickly.
Sensing your need to feel useful, the members of Aemond's commune assign you daily tasks, like helping out with harvesting plants, preparing meals and cleaning up the Sept.
The building doesn’t seem to be used for ceremonies or communal prayer. Instead, the residents utilise it privately throughout the day; though you're not let in on their purpose.
Although not being too familiar with the Seven, you swear you could remember Aemond and Helaena attending services at the Sept when you were younger, not merely going there in solitude. Maybe they prayed together as well sometimes?
Another benefit of focusing on productivity was the distraction it gave you from thinking about what had occurred between you and your uncle three days prior.
Despite the initial disgust you'd felt, you had now decided that if you acted like it never happened, maybe it never did.
You’d sworn to never bring it up with Aemond, or ever tell anyone else for that matter.
He was still the Aemond you’d grown up with; the sensitive boy with a strong will, always on a mission to prove himself.
He’d always been a bit too ‘by the book’. Maybe he sincerely thought that you would enjoy it?
He might've read something about Freud’s theory on female hysteria and the power of orgasmic release, seeing the act as more of a medical procedure than a sexual encounter?
A weak theory, but still.
---
Despite helping out at every corner of the residence, you hadn’t seen Alys since leaving her with Jon.
But this morning, after Aemond had asked you to help the residents clean up the leftovers from breakfast, you spot her standing next to your uncle, talking about something in hushed voices while watching the residents tidy up.
Although you'd only spent a few days here, Aemond and Alys' position at the top of the hierarchy of the small community was evident.
They both had an air of authority about them that was hard to overlook, making the pair appear intimidating in a way that only a strict superior could.
Yet, they both choose to be soft spoken whenever they address the residents, often complimenting them on their diligent work.
Observing the duo, you notice Aemond nod towards you, which prompts Alys to approach, placing a gentle hand on your shoulder,
“I’d like for you to help me today”, she states, and although her voice is soft, as if asking a question, there seems to be no room for disagreement.
She ushers you to follow her as she makes way towards one of the almost overflowing flower beds; copious plants fighting for space.
Like every day since your arrival, the weather is practically perfect; sunny but with a comforting breeze passing through the fields. Alys reaches for two weaved baskets resting against the small cottage wall close by and hands you one before kneeling down by the flower bed. You follow her, admiring the abundance of herbs in front of you.
You’d never witnessed such a variety of plants grow so vigorously together. You’d hardly thought it to be possible. Maybe the weather and temperature conditions here were optimal? Or maybe they’d genetically modified the crops?
Alys' gentle, low voice breaks the silence,
“How has the stay here been for you so far?”
Even though you’d told yourself; decided that you’d never think about what had happened between you and Aemond in his office again, her questions forces your mind back there.
Sitting on his lap. His fingers inside you; stretching you out.
You shake your head slightly in an attempt to erase the thought.
You’re never going to think about that again.
You can’t.
“It’s been great. Everyone’s so welcoming and I’ve been able to spend a lot of time with Helaena”, you reply, focusing on the positive aspects of your visit.
It was all true; during your time here you’d felt welcomed and comforted. Cared for, even.
“That’s lovely”, Alys replies with a smile as she begins to pick basil leaves off the thin stem of the plant. “We’ve worked hard to create an environment where our residents can thrive, just like you seem to be doing”, she explains and your forehead wrinkles in contemplative confusion.
Are you thriving here?
You certainly look a lot better.
Your skin has almost started to glow. You wake up in the mornings feeling refreshed and rested.
But that could just be down to the fact that you’d found uninterrupted sleep. Plus, the appetising food served here seems healthy, consisting of ingredients the residents grew and prepared themselves.
“Well, the fresh air and delicious meals certainly help one thrive”, you reply with an unconvinced chuckle.
Alys’ eyes light up as they sweep over your face,
“You enjoy the food? I’m happy to hear that. I’ve put all of the past year's energy into curating the plants, grains and menu here”, she tells you, pride causing her to straighten up, sitting a bit taller.
“You truly have a gift, Alys. Any tips for an amateur like me?”, you inquire, relaxing a bit now that the conversation has taken a lighter turn.
She smiles at you and pulls out a small, green tin from the large pocket in the middle of the apron she’s wearing. She opens the lid and pulls out brass spoon. It’s filled with what looks like dirt, or clay, and smells similar to a compost.
Your nose wrinkles as she scoops some of the brown mush inside the tin onto her spoon, placing it by the plant's roots before firmly patting it down with the back of the utensil.
“I was doing my PhD at King’s Landing University before moving here. I was researching phytotherapy”, she explains as she scoops out another spoonful of brown mush from the tin and moves to add it to the next plant's roots.
“I was in my final year, fully consumed by my dissertation. Despite loving the topic, I was so stressed by my academic career that I seriously considered dropping everything and moving back to Harrentown. Then, I heard my professor tell me about this brilliant young man in the Political Science department”
Speaking about Aemond, her eyes almost look dreamy,
“His ideas were so radical, yet so natural, you know? He wanted to create a community where people were allowed to pursue their passions without the stressors of modern society. Where the Seven provide enough guidance”
You feel uneasiness creep up your spine. Her facial expression is almost trance-like as she talks about Aemond; as if he's a deity, ready to be worshipped.
“Well, modern society provides us with plenty of comforts as well, don’t you think?”, you counter with a strained laugh, trying to ease the mood a bit,
“What would you do if, like, one of the members got sick?”
Alys huffs a laugh as well and smiles to herself as she eyes the tin in her hand,
“We always get by”
After a quick lunch break, you continue to help Alys with various tasks around the residence; picking flowers, vegetables and herbs for her, plucking out weeds and organising seeds for future harvests.
You’d never seen seeds like the ones she showed you before; pitch-black in colour and almost supernaturally round.
When she saw your expression, she snorted a laugh and explained that they were from Yi Ti, used by herbalists for centuries.
She did not, however, answer you when you asked what they were going to be used for.
Although her presence had felt intimidating at first, you'd now grown calm around Alys. Something about her was almost bewitching.
Like the way her emerald eyes would lock with yours whenever you spoke, or how graciously she moved about the commune, greeting each resident in a gentle voice.
You also noticed that they never met her gaze, eyes cast down as she approached, only uttering a few polite phrases before rushing away.
Feeling more at ease spurred your confidence, and so you ask her what you’ve been aching to know for the past days,
“The other day…-", you begin with a wavering voice,
"-What happened between you and Jayne?”
You try to sound as casual as possible, but it only makes you sound strange.
Alys, who’s been picking some wildflowers from one of the fields close to the residence, doesn’t slow her pace for even the briefest of moments as she answers you, eyes still on the stem of the flower in front of her,
“Nothing for you to worry about”
She plucks the flower and gently places it in her weaved basket before moving to the next one.
“Okay”, you reply with uncertainty, “She seemed very upset though”
Alys finally looks up from the flowers she’s plucking and meets your gaze,
“Actions have consequences. I’m sure you know that. But with the justice of the father and the grace of the mother, mistakes can be forgiven”
Her face is much sterner than before. The comfort of familiarity that had blossomed between the two of you disappears in an instance, and you feel uneasy as her eyes narrow.
“Jayne has been forgiven and we will move forward. Just like how Aemond forgave you”
Alys turns around and quickly makes way towards the Sept, disappearing inside and closing the door behind her.
Forgave you for what?
For what happened in Aemond's office?
Did she know about that?
As the members of the commune prepare for supper, you go back to your room to have some time to yourself, mindlessly scrolling your phone while lying in bed.
The reception out here's not great, and now that you think about it, you hadn't seen any mobile phones during your stay, only a land-line hanging on the wall in Aemond's office.
After what happened with him, your mind had been too preoccupied to put any focus on replying to messages. You see a few from your mum and send her a quick reply to let her know that you’re doing well.
Seeing her name appear, you feel uneasy; like she knows of the secret you harbour. You feel guilty. And disgusted.
A sudden commotion outside throws you back into reality; back into the commune.
You hear raised voices, some sounding familiar, and you swiftly place your phone in your pocket before heading out.
You see Jon, eyes wide and face pale, on his knees in front of Aemond, mimicking how Jayne and Alys had looked a few days ago.
Aemond’s face is hard to read.
He looks stoic, yet his eye is furious; dark gaze glaring down at Jon.
Unlike Jayne, Jon doesn’t say anything. He raises his hands in surrender and locks eyes with Aemond; wordlessly pleading.
But for what?
By now, many of the residents have gathered around the two young men. Some look scared, others intrigued.
“Do you believe the Father to be just?”, Aemond’s soft voice asks, contrasting his utterly frightening appearance. Jon nods eagerly, eyes wide in panic.
“Then you’ll accept a punishment befitting the sin you’ve committed?”
Jon stiffens slightly, but eventually lowers his head in a slow nod. His eyes cast down to the ground; head hanging in surrender.
Aemond hums and pulls out a knife from the inside of the jacket he’s wearing over his usual white shirt and dark slacks.
It’s one you recognise. It had been gifted to Aemond on his 12th birthday by your grandfather, who’d declared that he was now a young man; a young Targaryen man, and therefore needed his own reminder of his Valyrian heritage.
Aemond flips the dagger in his hand as he regards the man before him, holding his hand out in an invitation to Jon. He wordlessly places his hand in Aemond’s, and you can now clearly see that he is shaking.
Aemond turns his hand so that he’s holding the back of it, Jon’s palm turned upwards,
“Mistakes can be forgiven, but justice must prevail”, Aemond speaks. His voice is louder than before to address the crowd gathering around him and Jon. It reminds you of a lecture.
Perhaps this is how he'd conduct classes at university?
The residents around you murmur in agreement. Aemond raises the dagger in his hand, eye cast down to make contact with Jon’s. He’s trembling out of fright and Aemond almost looks pleased at the display in front of him,
“We all need reminders of our wrongdoings, to prevent us from repeating them. Whenever you lose sight of the light, Jon, this will remind you to seek out the guidance of the Seven”, Aemond’s calm voice rings out as he suddenly presses the dagger into Jon’s palm.
He grunts in pain as the blade breaks his skin and blood flows freely from his hand. Aemond’s knuckles are white from the force in which he’s holding onto Jon’s hand, refusing to let the younger man go, staring into his eyes with a look so intimidating it demands submission.
You can’t take in the scene in front of you; can’t comprehend what’s happening.
As reality slowly comes back to you, you try to speak up, try to tell Aemond to stop, but your body doesn’t obey you; frozen in shock.
The other residents watch quietly, not making a sound as Aemond and Jon stay still, blade still penetrating Jon’s palm as his mouth winces in pain.
Your uncle finally pulls away from Jon, gesturing for Alys to move forward. She quickly pulls out some gauze from one of the pockets of her apron and kneels down next to Jon, gently wrapping it around his palm; blood pulsing out furiously.
Aemond’s stoic facade seems to falter slightly as his breathing turn laboured; jaw shut tight. He appears agitated, giving Jon and Alys one final look before stalking away towards the nearby path leading to the forest where he’d taken you for a walk a few days prior.
Your body finally obeys you as you call out his name in an urgent voice,
"Aemond!"
What the fuck had you just witness?
Aemond doesn’t turn around. He walk away in quick, angry steps, silhouette growing smaller and smaller. You throw a quick glance at Jon, whose face is even whiter than before, gauze around his palm already dark red with blood seeping through it.
You cannot bear to take in the gory sight, a thousand questions going through your head. You need answers, so you make your way towards where Aemond had disappeared.
The path into the forest grows blurrier as a thick fog settles over the commune. Still, you make your way towards where Aemond had disappeared, determined to confront him about what you’d just witnessed.
You spot a form in the white mist, sitting on a stump with his head in his hands. You approach quickly, thoughts still spinning in your head.
What was that all about?
Why did you cut Jon?
Why did he agree?
If he did agree, that is.
The fear that was etched on Jon’s face as he knelt before Aemond made you shiver. He’d seemed so scared of him; scared of what he might do to him.
Still, no one had interfered as your uncle cut the hand of one of the members of their community.
Is this the norm?
Aemond looks up as he hears your footsteps approach, face as unreadable as always.
“What the fuck was that, Aemond?!”
Your voice is shrill and accusing. Your eyes seek out his as you stop before him; expression furious and chest heaving.
“You need to call a medic or something, Jon’s bleeding heavily!”
Your cheeks feel hot as fury rolls through your body, setting it alight.
It’s amplified by the seemingly unrepentant state of the man before you.
“Don’t question how we do things here”, he warns, eye just as furious as it had been before,
“Jon knew the consequences of stepping out of line. We all do”.
“What could he have done to make you mutilate his hand?!”, you counter. You still can’t fully comprehend what had happened mere moments ago.
Had you just witnessed bodily mutilation in the name of religion?
Aemond clicks his tongue, displeased with your accusations. He tries to school his face into a calmer demeanour as he looks you over,
“Sit down and I’ll explain”, he offers, gesturing for you to take a seat on the damp grass in front of him.
Despite your initial desire to defy him, purely out of spite, your curiosity wins as you take a seat in front of the stump where he sits.
“Everyone living here has consented to our communal agreement”, he begins. You can’t help the scoff that slips out. He continues,
“One of the reasons why people feel so depressed and out of place is due to the secularisation of the modern world. They’ve lost their connection to the Seven; lost sight of the light. A belief in the divine brings us closer together. Closer to the seven faces of the God”
“You all need help if you believe that physical violence will bring you closer to the gods”
It's hard to hide the disgust in your voice. Aemond’s jaw shuts tightly and the calmness on his face looks forced,
“Help me then”, he bites back, irritation penetrating his serene facade. “Pray with me”.
He grabs both your hands suddenly and traps them in his, lowering his head as he recites a prayer you haven’t heard before.
You try to pull your hands away but his grip is iron-like as he continues to mumble the prayer under his breath.
After a while, he grows quiet, yet keeps the grip around your hands. You look up at him. He's already awaiting your gaze.
Aemond looks like he’s contemplating something; different from his usual, determined state.
“Maybe you should help me like I help you; easing the pressure from within”
His hands pull yours towards the zipper of his slacks. Your body freezes in shock for a brief moment, then quickly pull away from him in reflex.
His grip on your hands is tight. He'd anticipated you'd fight back.
He brings your hands towards his crotch, now in such a tight grasp that your fingers ache. There's a hardness there, and your mouth goes dry, a rush of anxiety go through your body,
"Aemond, no, not aga-", you begin but he cuts you off.
“Would you prefer it if I told Helaena what you let me do to you in my office?"
His voice is foreign; cold and uncaring.
This is not the Aemond you know. The one who let you cry out in his embrace.
This is the Aemond they know.
"Or should I tell my other sister?”
You feel cold all over, shivering at his words.
A threat.
He lets one of his hands leave yours and undoes his zipper. He pulls out his length; already hard and furiously red.
You’re once again consumed by feelings of unreality.
This can’t actually be happening, right?
Aemond grips one of your hands, grasping it painfully hard as he pulls it towards his cock.
He presses into the sides and bends your fingers so they circle around him; much larger hand enveloping yours as he forces you to cool his desire.
He sets a fast pace; letting you know exactly how he likes it. His other hand moves towards your mouth, stunning you yet again as he pushes two fingers into your mouth.
Before you have a chance to pull your head away, he brings his spit-covered fingers down to your hand - the one he's using to pleasure himself with - and smears your saliva over the palm before guiding it back to his length again.
As your slick hand makes contact with his burning flesh once more, he grunts and closes his eyes; brows knit together in bliss. He lets you continue the motion by yourself, hands falling to the sides of his lap.
In the middle of this surreal experience, you can’t help but look up at him, admiring his beauty.
Such an intimidating man, instilling fear in so many around him, currently at your mercy.
You almost feel a headrush at the thought; having Aemond in the palm of your hand. Literally.
The continuous friction of your hand against his flesh removes some of the stickiness, and you hear him let out something similar to a whine as your hand grows drier.
His previously intimidating features suddenly look pleading as he gazes down at you, asking you to just comply.
Just give him this.
Without much thought of the consequences, instead of licking your palm, you move your head toward his length, darting your tongue out and licking a stripe over his tip. He lets out a surprise moan, and the unexpected feeling of pride rushing through your body makes your stomach turn.
You are not enjoying this!
Still, the praise travels down and settles in your core, causing a dull throb to pound between your thighs.
Then why does it feel so good to be praised by him?
You continue to pleasure him with your hand, though Aemond’s eye has traveled down to observe your mouth. His gaze occasionally flickers down to your clothed chest, peeking at the sliver of cleavage visible from above. One of his hands grasp your chin,
“Do that again”, he commands, and the disgust you'd felt towards yourself swirls in your belly again.
You shake your head, “No”
He lets out a grunt, hand still on your jaw as he slowly and firmly brings your head closer to his manhood.
Like before, you try to push away from him, to gain some sense of control, but he is far stronger than you,
“You do as I say”, he counters, and in one swift motion, he pulls your head towards his cock with such force that you nearly knock your forehead against his stomach.
As you part your lips to protest, he pushes himself inside of your hot, wet mouth, sighing in relief.
You feel panic come over you as you try to pull away, but he quickly places both hands on your head; keeping you in place.
“Breath through your nose. Be the good girl I know you are”
He grunts and begins to buck into your mouth.
You place your hands on his thighs in another feeble attempt at escaping his assault on your mouth, but to no avail. He drags your face over his length, palms moving to grab each side of your head as his movements grow quicker. You gag slightly.
“You feel so fucking good”, he breaths out, voice drunk on lust,
“You look so fucking good with my cock in your mouth, you know that?”
It feels like he's mocking you. It sounds like he adores you.
His thumb gently brushes away some of the strands that has fallen over your face.
The want in between your legs throb. The disgust in your stomach rumbles. You know that his words of praise shouldn’t make your underwear sticky.
But they do.
Your eyes water as he continues to fuck your mouth, not giving you any rest. You try to whine against him to make him stop; to at least let you come up for air, but he takes your sounds as moans and groans, moving in your mouth faster and harsher.
Finally sensing your need for a break, he manoeuvres your head off of his cock. You pant heavily as you gulp for air; lungs hurting from the sudden, sharp inhale.
A string of saliva connects your lips to his length, and his eye seems to be even more lust-filled as he moves his hand to caress your flushed cheek.
Even in this selfish, pleasure-driven madness, he regard you with fondness.
“Aemond, please, we can’t do this”, you plea.
His gaze flickers from your spit-soaked, swollen lips to your cleavage, and then back.
He doesn’t grant you a reply as he stands up abruptly, taking advantage of your startled state and shoves his length back into your mouth.
Your hands instinctively come up to his legs to have something to hold onto as he fucks your face with even more vigour than before, swearing under his breath.
You feel disgusted at the vicious arousal pooling in your stomach, seeping out of your core.
How could something so degrading feel so sensual?
How could you feel aroused by your uncle using you like this?
Aemond moves his hands to the back of your head, pushing you so that your nose makes contact with the hairs at the bottom of his stomach. He pushes his hips against you harshly and lets out a prolonged grunt.
You gag and stifle a cough, feeling his hot liquid fill your throat, then your mouth.
He slowly pulls away, hands still gripping your head as his eyes return to their wholly intimidating appearance,
“Swallow”, he demands, placing a large palm over your mouth, blocking your nose as well.
You know that you have no choice but to oblige him and force the sticky, salty fluid down your throat with a wince.
Aemond gives your kneeling form one last once-over before letting out a hum, swiftly putting his cock back into his trousers.
Without another word, he leaves, and you're left on your knees by the stump, fog now so thick that you can hardly see the path leading back to the residence.
You wipe away the spit trailing from the corner of your mouth with the back of your hand before standing on shaky legs.
Could you pretend like this never happen either?
As if in a trance, you make your way back to the commune; head filled with thoughts, yet too exhausted to comprehend anything.
You move to the basin placed in the corner of your room, reaching for your toothbrush without looking up at your reflection in the mirror.
You brush your teeth three times, reapplying tooth paste as the lather in your mouth disappears.
You want to get the taste of him out of your mouth.
It doesn’t go away.
Realising that you’ve been carrying your phone in your pocket this whole time, you tap the screen. A few new message from your mother and brother.
You hadn't even noticed.
Without checking, you turn your phone off, tossing it in your bag as you make your way to the bed.
You feel exhausted. Disgusted. Aroused.
This can’t be real.
Forgiving
The sheets of the bed are soft against your skin.
The rays of the morning sun shine through your window, and in the glow of the day’s early hours, you feel rested; comforted by the cosiness of your bed.
As you turn to the side, snuggling into the duvet, you wonder why this comforting place ever caused you to feel unease.
And then you're reminded of last night.
The memory makes a shiver go down your spine and your body trembles; trying to shake the chill away. Still, the feeling crawling under your skin doesn’t quite disappear.
Usually, you wouldn’t be able to sleep in the anxious state you’d been in last night.
Yet, for some reason, as soon as your head touched the cool pillow, you’d fallen into uninterrupted slumber.
Though your mind was spinning from all the conflicting thoughts you were having, your body was surprisingly relaxed; well-rested and freed from tension.
You’re hungry too, you notice. The rumble in your stomach vibrates, prompted by the clatter of the residents preparing for breakfast outside.
Without much thought, you get up, get ready and head outside. The warm rays of the sun greet you and you have to squint in order to see who’s already seated at the long table.
To your surprise, you’re met by the same scene as the last couple of days.
Aemond is standing by the edge of the wooden table, speaking with Alys. Jon is carrying bread in a large basket, carefully placing a few buns in each empty bowl placed on the table. Helaena is fussing over the wildflowers adorning the table, laughing as Jayne tells her something you can’t make out.
The scenery is still perfect, despite what had occurred the day before between Aemond and Jon.
Between Aemond and you.
You walk towards the table and take your usual spot next to Helaena, offering her a strained smile as she greets you. You’d thought keeping up appearance would prove to be a true challenge, but right now you feel oddly at peace; calm even. And hungry.
As soon as Aemond finishes thanking the Seven in his morning prayer, you begin to pile food on your plate.
Everything looks mouthwatering, the freshly baked bread still warm in your hand as you tear it apart and smother it in butter. You usually weren’t the type to have an appetite when you feel anxious or stressed, but today your uneasy state only works to amplify your hunger.
As you eat, the stress that had been causing nervous waves to ebb through your body stills, and you feel more at ease. Your mind is calmer, less crowded with thoughts.
Numb.
As you finish your meal, you look up from your plate to watch the scenery surrounding you, appreciating the lush greenery of the commune that had been lost on you before.
The rays of the sun shine through the gaps between the leaves of the bright green beech trees encircling you, casting a gorgeous glow over the residence.
Gods, it's beautiful here.
You look over at Helaena, whose hair seems to shimmer in the sun. Her smile only highlights her beauty; lilac eyes kind with a glint of something playful.
“Do you want to help me with my insect farm today? I’m going to go check on the crickets now after breakfast”, she asks, tone as pleasant and upbeat as it always is here.
“Sure”, you reply, standing up to follow her.
She walks behind one of the small cottages, and an array of insect farms come into view.
They resemble little houses made of wood, and even standing a good few metres away, you can see insects crawling all over the wood.
Helaena moves between them swiftly, peeking inside to see how her favourite creatures are faring. You’d never understand her obsession with such creepy beings, but watching her now, you feel warmth in your chest. She looks so happy; so at peace.
This really is the perfect place for her.
She beckons you over to one of the miniature houses and you approach her wearily, unable to hide the aversion you felt for the bugs.
Helaena giggles as she sits down on the ground to gain better access to the farm, nodding her head in a silent instruction for you to do the same. You join her, though you sit down slightly behind where she is, hoping she can provide you some distance from the insects littering each piece of wood of the farm.
“Are you sure you have to leave by the end of the week? I’d love for you to stay here longer”, she sighs, eyes fixed on the insects in front of her. She’s brought a small pouch with her which she opens, fingers digging inside for some seeds to feed her six-legged friends.
“I have to get back to work”, you answer, already dreading the inevitable.
The constant stress, the sleepless nights, Gwayne's endless nagging.
Would you be able to sleep as well as you did out here back home?
Would sleep feel as serene?
Despite all the uneasy situations you’d found yourself in, an unfamiliar sense of calm settles on your chest, pushing down your anxiety.
Maybe things would be easier if you stayed out here? Just for a while longer?
You're pulled out of your thoughts as Helaena speaks up again, eyes still on the farm, hand now buried deep within its walls, placing seeds inside for the insects to fight over.
“I think you’d be better off here. I saw you in a dream, you know. You were smiling, wearing a beautiful crown of flowers, holding hands with Aemond”
You feel yourself stiffen.
“He told me you’d come when he invited me to live with him here”, she continues, eyes finally straying away from the crickets; meeting yours.
You want to tell her about what happened, but the words seem stuck in your throat.
Would she believe you?
Would she be disgusted with you?
“Hel, I-”, you begin, choking as tears well up in your eyes. You try to clear your throat so that the lump of sadness suffocating you goes away,
“I-, I don’t think Aemond likes me”, is all you are able to get out as unexpected tears spill out from the corners of your eyes.
You wish you could tell her more, but your body doesn’t obey you; mind feeling foggy and throat closing up.
You can't sort your thoughts, or feelings, out.
“Oh, don’t cry, love”, she says as she wipes away a fat tear sliding down your cheek,
“There's no reason to feel bad. Aemond likes you. He would never do anything to harm you. He cares for you so much”
Though her voice sounds genuine, her gaze seems to drift away as she talks about her brother.
“He’s cared for you ever since we were small, you know. Do you remember that summer when we were all together on Driftmark? Before Aemond lost his eye?”
You swallow thickly at the memory.
“You remember when you two asked me to wed you out on the beach because you wanted to stay together forever?”, she asks, voice gentle and a knowing smile playing on her lips.
The memory causes you to spill more tears. Everything was so much easier back then.
“Don’t you miss how close you two used to be?”, she asks, compassionate and caring.
Yes, you do.
“Yeah”, you let out, voice thick from sadness. “But everything changed after Aemond lost his eye. He-, he didn’t want to spend time with me anymore”
You sound so small; your own words make you feel like a child again, abandoned by your best friend.
“Well, we’re here now, together. So that we can all reconnect. We’ve missed you”
Helaena moves closer to you, throwing her arms around you and hugs you tightly.
You slump against her, burying your face in the crook of her neck. Despite all the weird interactions with Aemond during your visit, Helaena had been a constant; brightening your days and making you feel seen.
She was always so happy to see you.
She was always so genuine.
You pull away once your sobbing ceases, giving Helaena one last squeeze before mumbling a quiet “thank you”.
She smiles, wipes her thumbs over your wet cheeks and locks eyes with you,
“You’ll feel better once you’ve settled in properly”, she says with a smile.
You don’t really understand what she means but nod anyway.
Agreeing feels good.
Agreeing feels comforting.
As you make your way back to your cottage, you spot Jon by one of the flower beds, watering the abundant plants fighting for space in their wooden confinement.
He doesn’t look much different from a few days ago, but when he spots you approaching, his slouching shoulders go rigid.
“Hi”, you say, trying to keep your voice light as you draw near him.
“Hey”, he replies, smiling in a way that doesn’t quite reach his eyes.
Your eyes instantly move to inspect his hand.
The gauze has been changed recently, clinically white and neatly wrapped around his palm,
“How’s your hand?”, you ask, curiosity getting the best of you.
“Fine”, is all he replies as he walks towards the next flower bed, away from you.
He tilts the watering can, letting the water rains down on the flourishing plants.
“What Aemond did to you-, I-, it’s completely unacceptable”, you say as you trail after him,
“You could press charges you know”
Not that you actually think Jon would, for some unexplainable reason he had seemingly agreed to getting his hand slashed. But you wanted him to understand that this kind of behaviour was inexcusable, even if he'd consented.
Jon’s eyes darken as he turns his head from watching the droplets fall on the flowers to observe you.
“Aemond knows what’s best. No point in me going against him”, he says in resignation, eyes shifting again, looking out at the endless fields surrounding the commune.
“Aemond acted like a fucking psycho yesterday, you don’t have to excuse his behaviour”, you try to assure Jon, shifting your body to move a little closer to where he’s standing.
His eyes go wide in panic, quickly looking around to make sure no one is nearby.
“Do not say things like that”, he warns, voice barely above a whisper.
“Aemond and Alys hear everything. They have eyes and ears everywhere, especially Alys. She sees much and more”
His eyes have grown impossibly large, resembling those of an animal pestered by a predator,
“They say the Father is all-seeing; knowledgeable on all topics. Almighty. There are people here who-”, he pauses as his eyes again dart around in a stressed frenzy, making sure no one is listening in on your conversation,
“- who believe Aemond is the human embodiment of the Father”
Jon’s confession catches you off guard and you let out a snort at his utterance. His panicked eyes narrow in anger at you.
“You haven’t been here long enough to have seen what I have”, he tells you with a sneer,
“You do not understand the power that he holds”.
Though you'd initially thought Jon was someone you could become friendly with, you now find yourself backing away from him and his evident madness.
Aemond might be smart, but he is no deity.
You’re slouching in the rocking chair in the corner of your room, trying to read the book Helaena had lent you.
This is the third time you feel like giving up; mind too fuzzy to fully take in anything you're reading.
Why is it so hard to concentrate?
To distract yourself?
You’d planned on giving your mum a call when you retreated to your cottage, but couldn’t even bear to pick up your phone.
She had a way of knowing what you were thinking, without you even telling her. She knows you so well.
Too well.
She would sense that something's off.
That there's something you're not telling her.
What if she figures out what you and Aemond had done?
You’re startled by a sudden knock on your door.
Quickly standing, you rush to the door, nerves on high alert.
Aemond’s ducks his tall frame as you pull the door open, face level with yours. You feel that familiar shiver run down your spine, making your body shudder slightly.
He looks as impeccable as always; hair half up so that the silver strands stay out of his face, button-down shirt and slacks perfectly form-fitted and ironed to eliminate any trace of a wrinkle; any indication of a flaw. His eyepatch is securely placed over his damaged eye, long scar poking through the sides.
“Can we talk?”, he asks, voice low and gentle.
You’re not sure what to say, and move to the side to allow him inside. For some reason denying him feels out of the question.
You go back to the wooden rocking chair, sitting down and pulling one leg up to wrap your arms around yourself, a meek attempt at shield yourself from whatever Aemond has in mind.
He sits down on the bed, back stiff and gaze darting around the room before settling on you.
“I wanted to thank you for yesterday”, he starts, face stoic.
“Thank me?”, you reply by reflex, not entirely sure of what he’s referring to.
He can’t be referring to what happened in the forest?
“Yes. I really appreciate you helping me out”, he continues matter-of-factly. You’re stunned, mouth half-open in disbelief.
“And I wanted to apologise for leaving you after. That won’t happen again”
His eye never leave yours. He sounds so sincere it is hard not to take his gratitude and apology to heart.
Still, the memory of what you’d done causes bile to rise in the back of your throat.
Forgiving him and moving on would be so simple.
“It’s okay, Aemond, we don’t have to talk about it anymore”, you mumble, eyes looking down to pick at the sleeve of the linen blouse you’re wearing.
You’d rather just forget.
Move on.
Never speak or think about it again.
It never happened.
“Alright”
He’s silent for a moment before he speaks up again,
“I also wanted to thank you for coming out here to visit us. It’s been so nice to reconnect over these past few days”
There he is again.
The boy who’d been your best friend all those years ago.
Fierce and attentive at once; contradicting in every way. His timid smile is still the same, just as inviting to mischief as it had been when you were little.
You still can’t quite find the words to engage in conversation with him. Half of you wants to run away from his unpredictability, yet the other half wants to stay and bask in it.
“I’ve missed you”, he continues. You know he is genuine when you look up to meet his gaze.
You’ve missed him too.
“I’ve missed you too”, you confess quietly. You can’t seem to look away from his eye. It's almost hypnotising.
“Wouldn’t you like to stay here for a while longer? I can talk to Gwayne”, he offers.
“Oh that’s not necessary, I have to go back. I already know I have a full mailbox waiting for me”, you quip, trying to sound witty. Aemond’s face remains impassive.
“I always wondered why you decided to work with my uncle. Such a waste of potential”, he muses as he regards you,
“I think you could achieve much more if you chose another path in life”
His expression is serious, still his voice is gentle.
Like he’s telling you, not advising you.
Before you have a chance to reply he speaks up again,
“I’d like you to join a sermon we’re having tonight. You could benefit from some guidance”
You can’t come up with a reason to decline his invitation fast enough, and Aemond lets out a pleased hum at your silence.
“Six o’clock in the Sept”
He stands and reaches his hand towards you, squeezing it in goodbye.
He leaves your cottage and you watch him retreat to the Sept through your window.
The tall building truly holds an imposing aura; the seven pointed star sinister in its daunting simplicity.
Unsettling.
You enter the Sept right before six.
To your surprise, all residents of the commune are already seated, sitting in rows leading up to the unadorned wooden altar; carvings of the Seven decorating all sides of it.
The only one standing is Aemond, right next to the altar.
Next to him is a chair, and as you walk towards where the residents are seated, Aemond clears his throat and gestures for you to take a seat on the chair next to him, facing everyone.
“Please, join me”, he says and beckons you over.
Everyone present is watching you expectantly, leaving you no choice but to join Aemond and take a seat next to where he’s standing.
“Our guest of honour, everyone”
His voice is soft, yet you notice a hint of amusement hiding behind his stoic façade.
He says a short prayer, welcoming everyone to the sermon and expressing gratitude to all faces of the Seven.
“Today, I’d like to talk about forgiveness”, Aemond explains, and you watch as all residents observe him diligently, eyes rarely blinking.
He seems to hold such power within these seven walls.
Such authority.
“Granting someone forgiveness takes strength, given to us by the Warrior”
The residents are silent, but you see a few of them nodding along to Aemond’s words.
Helaena and Alys sit closest to where you and Aemond are, watching you attentively.
“All actions have consequences, and we must be reminded of this to prevent us from repeatedly committing wrongdoings. When I was 10, I was taught the consequences of my actions as my nephew brought a knife to my face, taking my eye”
His tone grows colder as he speaks, and you feel that all too familiar shiver run down your spine.
Only this time, you cannot shudder to make it go away. It stays at the base of your back; taking hold of you and keeping you in a state of acute uneasiness.
“Though I was consumed by hatred after being robbed of my sight, the Seven provided me with guidance, showing me the light in the darkest of times”
Aemond moves to stand in front of you, one hand coming up to pull the eyepatch that seemed to be a permanent feature on his face away.
You hadn’t seen him without it since the accident, and you have to stifle a gasp as you take in the entirety of his face.
The scar that your brother had branded him with is still red, still angry as you follow it with your eyes; starting at his forehead and ending on his cheek.
The socket where his eye had previously been is surrounded by scarred tissue; healed but still furious.
In the empty socket lays a sparkling sapphire, almost appearing alive as the light from the candles in the Sept reflects upon its surface.
The contrast of the beautiful gem nuzzled in the red, vexed scar reminds you of Aemond himself; full of rage and beauty.
“I’ll tell you the story behind this scar”
He moves to stand behind you as his hands rest on the backrest of the wooden chair,
“I was enjoying a day at the beach with my dearest childhood companion-”
His voice is borderline mocking. In your peripheral vision you see his knuckles go white from to the tight grip he has on the backrest of your chair,
“- though she adored me as well, she never defended me against the nasty remarks her brothers would throw my way”
His icy voice heats with anger,
“Having had enough of their torment, I defended myself, much like the Warrior would have. Like the Father, I demanded justice for their unbecoming behaviour. Yet, when I gained the strength to defend myself against my tormentors, the one who was supposed to be by my side abandoned me”
Although you can’t see him standing behind you, you can feel the infuriated energy radiating from his body. You desperately seek the resident's eyes for some sympathy, yet find none.
“That-, That’s not what happened Aemond”, you try to protest, but your voice comes out too weak to truly make an impact.
“Is it not? Then enlighten me. Did you not leave me to defend myself?”
One of the hands he has placed on the back of the chair moves to rest on your shoulder, squeezing it harshly.
“I didn’t-, you were fighting and I didn’t-, I was going to get an adult!”
You sound as desperate as you feel. The gazes of the residents feels burning as they regard you with disapproval.
You still remember how an innocent fight between children had escalated as soon as Aemond picked up a rock, refusing to take in your pleas to just let it go. Not knowing what to do, you’d sprinted towards the family’s summer house to get your mum or Alicent; anyone who could help you de-escalate the madness on the beach.
When you came back, Aemond was on the ground, screaming as he clutched his blood-covered face.
The memory makes you grow cold all over. That had been the worst day of your childhood; amplified by the fact that Aemond had refused to speak to you afterwards. Though your families had managed to mend the broken bond somewhat, Aemond had never looked at you the same.
“The Seven tell us that sins can be forgiven, and though I have forgiven you for this”, he gestures towards his eye, “you were never made to apologise for your transgression. I’d like to offer you forgiveness”
“Apologise to me”
He pushes at your shoulder, gesturing for you to stand in front of the onlooking residents. You heed his instruction, turning so that you're facing him.
"Kneel"
You get down on your knees, looking up at Aemond’s imposing stature. He is frightening, the clearly satisfied state of his face haunting you.
“I’m sorry”, you say meekly; low and defeated.
“Come on, you can do better than that”, he encourages.
His voice is loud and with a hint of poorly concealed amusement.
“I’m sorry”, you repeat, this time louder.
“You’re not going to address me when you’re on your knees, asking for my forgiveness?”, he asks, tilting his head.
You bite the inside of your cheek, feeling your face grow hot from the feelings rumbling in your chest; rage, sadness, betrayal.
Why is he so intent on humiliating you?
“I’m sorry, Aemond”, you bite out.
He approaches you, hand stretched out to touch your head, gently stroking your hair. He brings his hand down to cup your chin, tilting your head so that you look up at him; meeting his purple and blue gaze.
“I forgive you”, he says, and despite sincerity being evident in his voice, you cannot help but feel like this is all just a farce.
The onlooking residents stay silent, but you feel their eyes observe you like flames against your skin.
The only sound coming from the audience is from Helaena, who lets out a quiet “lovely” as her smiles at you and Aemond. You eye her in disbelief.
Does she not see how fucked up this is?
As soon as the sermon finishes you dart out the door, speedily walking the short distance to the cottage you’re staying at.
You cannot bear to stay in this madness for even a second longer.
You slam the door open, grab your belongings and stuff them down your bag with force.
The sun is setting and you know that there are no streetlights out here, only open fields and forest. You'll need to find your way back to the station alone, Helaena’s clearly as mad as the rest of them.
You peek out through the door. No one seems to be nearby and you know this is your chance to sneak away without being forced to face Aemond, Alys or Helaena.
The sun is hanging low on the horizon as you quickly move towards where you and Helaena had emerged a few days prior.
You walk briskly, the commune growing smaller as you move further away.
The forest that had mesmerised you with its beauty slowly turns terrifyingly imposing as darkness chases the comforts of daylight away.
Though you're sure you’ve been following the way you and Helena came, you soon find yourself at a crossroads in the middle of two paths, not knowing which will lead you back to the small village where the train station was.
As you briefly stop to contemplate your options, a dark figure appear on your side.
Jayne’s eyes are kind as she offers you a curt smile, reaching out to take your hand.
“Come with me”, is all she says before moving in quick steps, pulling you along the path to the right. You follow without protests; you wouldn’t know the way without guidance anyway.
You spot what looks like a street light ahead and you feel your body relax at the thought of being close to the train station, soon on the way back home.
Finally you’ll be able to leave this week behind.
As you come closer however, you start to recognise the small, wooden houses. In the middle stands a large, looming building with lights illuminating the seven pointed star in the middle.
You try to jerk your hand away from Jayne, but her hold on you is iron-like as she pulls you towards the Sept.
“Don’t worry”, she tries to reassure you.
“Soon you’ll realise that this is where you’re meant to be”
Prospering
Jayne forcefully drags you into Aemond's office, quickly exiting to lock the door from the outside. You’re still in shock, adrenaline pumping through your veins.
You inhale deeply, trying to calm yourself enough to assess the situation.
Everyone here’s deranged.
You’re outnumbered.
You could fight as hard as you like, and you’d still lose.
You start to nervously pace back and forth in front of Aemond’s large wooden desk, attempting to expel some of the nervous energy within you.
They wouldn't hurt you, right?
That’d be mad.
You think back to the true crime documentaries you used to be obsessed with. The best thing to do was play along with the madness and strike when they least expect it.
Make them believe you’re not a threat so they’ll trust you.
You just needed to keep your head cool and play along a little while longer. Then they’d take you back to the train station and you could go back home.
A sharp rap on the door pulls you away from your thoughts.
You hear someone fiddle with the lock before the door opens slightly and Alys slips through the small crack. You can hear voices outside, but they quickly fade away as Alys shuts the door promptly.
She gives you a nod, expression as calculated as it always is. She’s carrying two wine glasses in one hand and holding an opened bottle of wine in the other.
“Oh relax”, she tells you with a smile,
“Have some wine, it’ll calm your nerves”
She places the glasses on the desk, pouring you both a serving each before putting down the bottle and handing you one of the glasses.
“Here’s to a prosperous future”, she says, raising her glass and giving you a nod. You match her gesture, bringing the glass to your lips as you watch her take a sip.
The wine tastes like the ones your mum usually orders when you go out to eat; rich and with some lingering spiciness.
“Dornish red. Aemond’s favourite”, Alys states. Her delicate fingers are wrapped around the stem as she holds the glass elegantly.
She seems to do everything with grace, never faltering. Never appearing clumsy or out of place.
It's hard not to admire her.
“You know he’s only trying to help you, right?”, she asks.
"I-", you’re quiet for a while as you rack your brain for something to say that won’t upset her, “I appreciate that, but I need to get back home and-“
“Just let him help you, okay?”
Though her voice rises slightly at the end, it doesn’t feel like a question.
You know that there is no room for argument. Alys has maintained her calm appearance, yet her eyes are so expressive; the only part of her face that she can’t force into submission.
Their intensity make the hairs at the back of your neck rise, demanding you obey her.
She downs her glass before placing it on the desk, leaving you alone yet again in Aemond’s office.
It’s gotten dark now, the sole window in the room not providing much light anymore.
You continue to sip the wine in your glass as you lean against the desk next to you. The alcohol might provide you with some comfort; sooth your anxiety.
A soft knock on the door announces the presence of your next visitor.
Helaenas’ silver hair brightens up the dark room as she enters. She’s holding a flower crown in one hand, beautifully crafted with wildflowers you recognise from the bouquets always adorning the table outside.
“Hi”, she greets with a smile.
You nod back at her, still not quite sure how to appraise her.
She’s been one of the people you’ve felt closest to your entire life, yet she seems to approve of the mad things happening here.
How can she not see how humiliating Aemond’s actions during the sermon had been?
“I made this for you”, she says and hands you the flower crown.
As your hands touch, her fingers linger on yours, tips dragging over your knuckles with a feather-light touch.
“Thanks”, you reply curtly, not sure of what to say.
You want to ask Helaena for the way back to the train station.
Ask her to come back with you to Oldtown.
But she’s so different here. She overlooks so much, agrees to so much.
Always with a smile.
“Put it on”, she urges, hands moving to the flower crown to help you place it on your head. You want to protest but you’re so tired of it.
Tired of asking questions.
Tired of going against everyone.
“There”, she says with a smile as she regards you, face even brighter than before,
“You look so beautiful”
“Hel..”, you try, tongue coming out to lick your lips as you choose your words carefully.
She’s still your dear aunt; still Helaena.
“I want to go back home, Hel. We could go together, if you like?”
Despite trying to keep your voice even, you sound a little frantic.
“No you can’t leave now”, is all she replies, dismissing you. She doesn’t appear to be upset by your words though, lips still forming a warm smile.
“Hel, listen. What you’re doing here is not okay. Aemond maimed a man! And he humiliated me in front of everyone. Something’s wrong with him”
Your eyes dart all over her face and stature to assess her reaction to your words. You’re astonished by her indifference, almost like she’s not taking your words in.
She places a hand on your shoulder, squeezing lightly as her eyes lock with yours,
“All actions have consequences. We’re all made aware of that here. Aemond only wants what’s best for us. He’s worked so hard to provide us with this. You should be thankful”
She leaves you alone in the room once more, and as she exits, you hear her secure the lock on the door from the outside.
By the time you hear someone unlock the door next, you’ve finished the glass of wine Alys gave you.
The room is now illuminated by nothing but the light of the moon shining through the window, casting a silver glow over the office.
Matching the man entering.
Aemond’s tall silhouette appears, instantly making you straighten up, dread washing over you.
He has been so volatile during your stay here, making you feel unease by the mere sight of him.
You can still hear chatter and what sounds like furniture being shuffled around outside as the door is left ajar by Aemond, who moves towards you.
He stands so close to you that his feet are touching yours.
His face is stern, looking at you down his nose. Fighting the fright within you, you meet his gaze, refusing to give him the satisfaction of backing down too easily.
Still, you know that you’ll need to play your cards right, go along with the madness here momentarily, so that they’ll eventually let you go home.
“Why did you leave?”, he asks, eyes never leaving yours.
His voice is that unique mixture of being gentle and stern, demanding you obey him and tell him the truth.
“I tried to leave because of what you did to me during the sermon. What you did to Jon!”
You’re unable to hide the fear-laced irritation you feel at his audacity.
How could he expect you to stay? Wasn’t it obvious why you left?
“I might have been selfish for needing that apology, but it was necessary. Now we can move forward together”
He moves one of the hands he’s had clasped behind his back towards you, gently placing his it in yours.
Your gaze flickers down to where he’s holding you. Your hand looks so small and delicate in his large one. His touch is warm.
You scoff at his attempt to reconcile,
“Who said I’ve forgiven you for what you did?”
“You know you owed me an apology after leaving me alone with your vicious brothers that night”, Aemond says and he shuffles even closer to you,
“Do you think that what happened during the sermon can match the pain I felt when your brother took my eye?”
“N- no, but Aemond-"
“No. You’ll never understand the pain I’ve been through. But I’ve chosen to forgive you, and now we can move forward together”
His voice is slightly strained as he lectures you. His purple eye is piercing, and though you’d wanted to match his strength, you can’t help it when your eyes look down in shame.
“However”, he speaks in a lower tone, thumb moving to stroke the back of your hand,
“I am disappointed in your attempt to leave me and Helaena here without even granting us a proper goodbye”
“You’ll prosper here with us, but you’ll have to follow our rules. Dishonesty is not allowed, and your actions show that you attempted to act deceitfully".
His hand drops yours as he grabs your arms on both sides, swiftly turning you around and pushing on you back with a firm hand so that you're bent over his desk.
You’re too startled to fight back, letting out a yelp as you feel him tower over you from behind. He leans down over your body, hand still firmly on your back, pushing down,
“You have probably heard stories of whipping those who refuse to see the light. But I am no monster, so I will spare you from the whip”, he murmurs next to your ear, hand on your back trailing downwards,
“My hand will serve”
Before you’re able to reply, or even fully take in what he’s telling you, you feel his large palm make swift contact with your backside, the gesture causing a loud smack to echo through the quiet room.
You let out a startled cry in pain as you turn your head to face Aemond, confused betrayal reflected in how your mouth fall open and eyebrows rise.
His hand smooths over the material of your skirt where he’s just slapped you, somewhat soothing the painful sting on your skin.
“For being deceitful, I’ll give you five smacks. That’ll teach you to behave”,
The stoic gentleness of his voice borders on sounding amused as he takes in your shocked face.
Can you still play along?
What will happen if you resist?
While you’re trying to calculate your next move, Aemond’s hand land another harsh hit on your ass.
You sqeel from the pain, but quickly try to stifle the sounds coming out of your mouth.
Your painfully aware of the fact that he left the door ajar.
The residents outside might hear what’s happening. You feel tears well up in your eyes from the humiliation; from the stinging pain on your backside.
Aemond shushes you as he once again smooths his hand over your abused flesh in a comforting manner,
“You’re doing so well, my love” he tells you, eyes meeting yours once again.
You don’t understand why his words stifle the anxiety you feel, but they do.
“Only three more”, he states as he lands another stinging hit on your ass, even harsher then before.
You can’t hinder the tears that escape down your cheeks anymore.
“Good girl”, Aemond coos as he soothes your pain with his palm. Though the fabric of your skirt separates your skin from his, you can feel the warmth radiating off him.
Hearing him praise you shouldn’t sooth your pain, or make you feel better in the slightest, but it does.
You notice the soft look of satisfaction in his eye and you feel proud.
His hand lands on you quickly and you bite your lip desperately to not cry out. More tears slide down your cheek as you give Aemond a pleading look.
“Just one more, and then you’ve served your punishment”, he reassures you as he caresses your stinging flesh.
You close your eyes, bracing yourself for the last smack to land and when it does, you flinch before letting out a sigh of relief because you’d done it, you’d taken the punishment and now Aemond would be pleased with you.
The thought makes a warm sensation spread in your chest and when you open your tear-filled eyes, Aemond is already watching you with an expression that feels nothing less than loving.
While one hand stays on your backside to gently caress you, the other travels to you face, cupping your cheek. His thumb runs over your cheek, wiping away some of the wetness.
“You took your punishment so well. You make me proud”, he tells you, and his soft voice sounds so sincere. You lean into his touch on instinct, his palm providing comforting warmth to your cheek.
Being praised by him makes you feel happier than you’ve been in a long time.
It feels so good to be appreciated; to know you did something well. You can’t help but smile as your eyes lock with his. He smiles back at you.
“Now, I’ve got a surprise for you”, he tells you as he straightens up, grabbing your arm to link it with his. You know that there is more you need to talk about; more that’s unsaid. Yet, your mind feels fuzzy and you’re finding it hard to properly sort your thoughts out.
Aemond snakes his hand around your waist, pulling you closer to him and you lean into his warmth; it’s so comforting.
“Aemond, I-, I still need to know…”, your voice dies as you mentally search for a question.
What was it that made you leave?
Oh! Jon!
“Why did you cut Jons hand?”, you ask, hoping that the softness of your voice will prevent his impending irritation. You don’t think you could handle another punishment.
Aemond is quiet for some time, possibly pondering his response, before he speaks,
“Jon spoke out of turn, questioning my roles as the leader of this community. He now understands that everything I do is for the good of the commune and its residents”, he explains, arm still holding you by the side as his palm rests out on your stomach.
“Here in the commune, we know that scars tell a story; they remind us of our wrongdoings and guide us when we stray from the light of the Seven”
He stops in front of the door, turning slightly to look at you,
“You should be grateful I didn’t scar you, like I’ve done to others. Soon you’ll appreciate all that I've done for you”
He pushes the door to his office open, revealing the large hall where you’d been humiliated during Aemond’s sermon.
The residents of the commune are all facing you, watching you expectantly as you emerge from the office.
They’re all sitting on the exact same seats as before. The Sept is dark, illuminated only by the scarce moonlight shining through the seven-pointed star carved in the upper part of the buildings large walls, and by the candles lit across the room.
You see one of the residents standing by the altar where Aemond had stood during the sermon.
You recognise him as one of Aemond’s former professors in King’s Landing. The man is probably in his early to mid-sixties with grey specks clear in his brown locks. He offers you a smile as you approach with Aemond, his brown eyes warm and inviting,
“Welcome”
Aemond leads you to stand in front of the altar, arm still anchoring you to him.
“Is everything ready?”, your uncle inquires as his grip around you tightens.
“Yes. Let’s begin with the seven vows”, the elderly man says before reciting what sounds like a long prayer.
Having Aemond hold you makes you feel secure, and it takes you a while to really comprehend what is going on.
Why are the two of you standing here, instead of sitting with the other residents?
“Do you accept the seven vows, the seven blessings and the seven promises?”, he asks, warm eyes meeting yours.
“I do”, Aemond replies next to you, squeezing your waist in a silent command for you to do the same.
You turn to face him, brows furrowed in confusion.
What is it you’re agreeing to?
Aemond’s patience seems to run thin as you remain silent.
You notice his jaw twitch as he gives the resident in front of you a pointed look, prompting the man to respond in a quick nod before moving to join the onlookers.
Aemond turns to fully face you, yet he doesn’t move his arm, tugging you towards him so that your soft chest knocks against his.
“With this kiss, I pledge my love, and take you for my wife”, he says before he surges forward, crashing his lips against yours.
You stiffen in his grip, trying to back away from him but unable to move in his hold. You hear applause echo through the hall as Aemond retreats, a satisfied smirk on his lips.
You open your mouth to protest, but your voice is drowned out by the loud chanting of the onlooking residents,
“One flesh, one heart, one soul, now and forever”
They abruptly stand, chanting over and over as they move towards the large wooden doors of the entrance, going outside to leave you and Aemond alone in the Sept.
Even after the last person has left and closed the door, you can hear them chanting outside.
“One flesh, one heart, one soul, now and forever”
The slight tranquillity you’d previously found comfort in vanishes as you search Aemond’s face for an explanation; an answer as to what is going on.
His hand cups your cheek again, the loving look he’d offered you before you left his office still present,
“Your decision to leave tells me that you are lost. I’ll help you. I’ll help you see the light again”
You’re lost for words.
“I’m doing this for you. I know how much you crave to be loved. I’ll give you that. Just trust me”
His reassurance does little to calm your nerves as you feel dread pool in your gut.
“But Aemond, not like this, we can’t-”, you protest weakly. Despite the uneasiness taking root inside of you, your body betrays you as it still leans into the touch of his hand.
“I know how to fix you, just like I fixed Helaena”, he comforts you. His seeing eye seeks yours, silently inciting you to trust him,
“You were made for me, and I for you. I know you’ve been feeling lost for a long time. My uncle told me how depressed you were in Oldtown”
“The mother blessed women with wombs to heal their inner sadness. Becoming a mother will heal you”,
He pushes your body against the altar,
“We need to consummate our marriage, or it won’t be recognised by the Seven”
You feel dread settle in your bones as you take in his word.
“No, Aemond, please-, this is wrong! What would our mothers say?”, you desperately try to reason, panic making your breath quicker as he places his hands on either side of you on the altar; caging you in.
He lowers his head so closely that your noses touch, eye never straying away from yours,
“They’ll understand”
His lips find yours again. You know kissing him is wrong, yet your body melts into his touch as his soft lips press against yours.
Maybe they would understand?
Aemond’s tongue gently swipes over your lower lip, pushing to gain access. As he deepens the kiss, his hands travel down to your skirt, gathering the fabric in his grip before breaking away from you.
You’re both breathing heavily as you stay frozen, taking in each other's expressions. A thin line of translucent spit connects your lips and you notice Aemond’s eye flicker down to watch your kiss-swollen lips.
The conflicting emotions within you rage like the worst of storms, making your head spin. Aemond’s gentle prodding had successfully made you into putty in his hands, yet the uneasy feeling from before remains, steering you away from his control.
“No, no. We can’t, this has already gone too fa-”, you’re abruptly startled to silence as Aemond swiftly sinks down to his knees, pushing up the fabric of your skirt to expose your underwear.
You try to push your legs together but one of his hands quickly dart out to pull down the small piece of fabric separating your skin from his.
You place your hands on both sides of his head in an attempt to push him away, but his face moves towards your exposed centre with determination.
He grabs ahold of the outside of your thighs as he pushes your body towards his face, tongue immediately finding your bundle of nerves, swiping over it in rhythmic circles. Your grip on his head tightens as you push with all your strength for him to back away, but to no avail. He buries his face further into the apex of your thighs as he grips your tights painfully, fingertips leaving colourful marks of ownership.
You whine from the pain; from the pleasure building inside of you as Aemond forces your body into submission. He manhandles your right leg so that it rests on his shoulder, giving him further access to assault you with his mouth.
He sucks on your clit as he brings two fingers up to slide through your folds; the ease of which they glide lets him know the effect his touch has on you.
His fingers find your entrance, pushing inside to instantaneously curl forward, finding that spot inside you that always brings you waves of pleasure. You let out a startled moan as your hands go limp around Aemond’s head, simply resting there.
You close your eyes, violent pleasure making it hard for you to think clearly, just like how you’d felt in his office a few days ago.
Why does he have this effect on you? Why is he so good at this?
Why does it feel so good?
Another pathetic moan leaves your lips as he picks up the speed of his actions, purple and sapphire gaze watching you intently. You close your eyes once again, internally surrendering to his touch.
You want it. You need it.
You feel something ignite within you just as your peak crashes over you. The intensity makes your walls clench around Aemond’s fingers as you gasp in pleasure. Your legs shake from the force and you grab onto his hair for some stability.
He withdraws from you, slightly out of breath, and stands, large frame looming over you.
“No one else makes you feel as good as I do, no one else sees you like I do. We have found each other through the guidance of the seven, can’t you see that? We were meant to be”, he says and grabs your waist to hoists your slack body up on the altar.
He pushes your thighs apart, reaching down to undo his slacks and pulls them down just enough to free his length. It is just as intimidating as it had been yesterday; thick, veiny and ragingly red.
“You want this, I know you do”, he says before pushing inside you, causing you to whine at the stretch. You feel so full, and the impact of your orgasm makes your head feel fuzzy; like you’re floating away. Your walls contract around Aemond and he moans as he lowers his head to rest in the crook of your neck.
“You feel just as perfect as I knew you would”, he whispers in your ear. He draws his hips back, pushing them into yours with such force that your body jolts on the altar. You try to hold on to him with every harsh thrust, but your limbs feel too weak. It all feels so overwhelming, so good, that you can’t bite your lip hard enough to hinder the moans that bounce around the seven walls of the Sept.
One of Aemonds hands come down to draw circles on your clit once more. He pulls back slightly to watch you; to take in your pleasure-drunk expression.
“Let them hear you”, He presses down on your bundle of nerves harsher, still dragging his cock in strong, calculated movements along your walls.
The precision of his touch pushes you towards another peak, but when you feel it nearing, he withdraws completely, eyes flickering down to briefly admire the coat of your slickness adorning his manhood.
He grabs your hips, pulls you down from the altar and turns you around so that you’re facing away from him. Like in his office mere moments ago, he pushes on your back so that your chest makes contact with the wooden surface. He lets his cock glide through your folds before he leans down to mumble in your ear,
“Tell me what you want”
Robbing you of release has left you confused. Resigned and desperate, you let the throbbing between your thighs guide you,
“You, Aemond. I want you”
He pushes inside you again with a pleased grunt, picking up the pace quickly as he fucks you against the holy pedestal. Your hands grab both sides as it rocks in tandem with Aemond’s thrusts. His hand finds you clit again and this time you peak within seconds, pleasure washing over you as your legs turn into jelly.
You feel your legs give in, causing you to slide down on the floor. Aemond doesn’t let you go as he keeps fucking you, following you down to the floor. Your upper body jolts from the force of his movements, slowly slipping down to make contact with the cold stone floor.
He leans over you, pounding into you with force. One of his hands comes to rest above you on the altar, allowing him to fuck you harder, and you whine on the floor beneath him,
“Fucking take it”, he grunts as he goes harder, the contact of his hip bone against your abused backside sending stings of pain through your body.
His fingers find your clit again and you moan in pain-filled pleasure at the overstimulation, one hand reaching for his to push it away.
Aemond tuts behind you, “One more. Be good and give me one more”
You try to turn your head so that you can face him, but you’re unable to move, trapped under his body as he takes his pleasure from you. All you can do is take it; give in.
You cry out as you cum for the third time. Your walls clench down on Aemond’s length vigorously as they coax his release from him. You hear him sigh in pleasure as he fills you.
After a few moments, he pulls away from you, fingers moving to stuff whatever spend has trickled down your thigh back inside. You hiss at the pain. He whispers a gentle apology in your ear, helping you pull your underwear back up.
He stands and reaches down under the altar, picking up the flower crown that had fallen from your head sometime during the consummation. His fingers grasp it gently, placing it back on your head.
He looks so beautiful standing in front of you, the soft light from the candles and the silvery glimmer from the moonlight illuminating his features. He gives you another quick kiss before leading you out of the Sept to greet the residents still gathered outside.
As the two of you emerge from the building, beaming smiles, loud congratulations and well wishes for a prosperous future greet you and your husband.
Aemond never lets go of you, keeping you close to him as he chats with the residents; explaining his vision for the commune moving forward and the new role you’ll play as a permanent resident.
Somewhere inside, you know that you should feel ashamed over what just occurred; over the fact that the residents probably heard the entire ordeal as they patiently waited for you outside.
But all you can feel is bliss; a pleasant calm spreading from your chest. Heating up your insides.
Your life before now had been a long struggle, where you were forced to suffer. Forced to part from your closest childhood friend, forced to pursue a career to feel adequate, forced to live a mundane life in isolation.
Aemond pulls you away from the crowd, leaning down to whisper in your ear,
“Look up”
You see bright, green streaks of light decorate the dark night sky, accompanied by thousands of stars. It is the most beautiful sight you’ve ever seen.
Aemond tugs you even closer to his side, resting his chin on your head as you silently admire the northern lights together. All you can feel is his warmth, the safety of being in someone’s embrace. Of being in Aemond’s embrace.
It’s warm.
Comforting.
Freeing.
Thank you for reading! 🩵
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TAKING- advantage of the strongest
He's been having a hard time lately, he's lost Suguru, his one and only, of course- you on the other hand are overjoyed at that fact.
It's annoying, after all, you've done for him, he calls out his name instead of yours, it's time you taught him a permanent lesson on manners.
P.s I TOLD YOU ITS NEVER GOJOVERRR RAHHH- [credits- __3aem on insta]
Also, follow my insta r3xni3 n text me, let's talk, im bored!!
...gojo Satoru...
Seeing Gojo with his head in his hands sitting at the edge of the school stairs wasn't a new sight for you, in fact for the past week you've been seeing him sitting there.
Crying, sobbing, or simply sitting in misery. He's always thinking of that damned suguru. Honestly, it was hard to get him to show you any affection with suguru around, and now that he's gone it's gotten even harder!
It's not that you hate suguru, you just love gojo, and seeing your gojo in pain annoys you, but. It also makes for the perfect opportunity to shove yourself in his life, when he's most vulnerable and make him rely on you
"what up 'toru?" Sitting down next to him gently touching his shoulder, you can't be too forward now. "..mhm, it's nothing." Hmm, well you knew it wouldn't be that easy, of course he wouldn't open up to you just yet! So you'll just keep trying- "come on satoru, this isn't like you, you're the strongest-"
"Can you leave? I'm not in the mood y/n." Running his hands through his hair he groaned as he hid his face. You got up without a word, it's fine, if he pushes you away you have many more ways to push back harder.
The continuing weeks during classes you would always make small talk, distracting his mind from geto. Then you'd buy him sweets saying that there was some buy one get one free offer, which is why you had brought one over for him there wasn't
You occupied him on the missions he'd usually go to alone, keeping him from feeling lonely. No matter how hard they were and no matter how much strain they put your body through you'd reassure him, you're fine!
He'd notice how you'd push yourself for him, it made him- feel. Feel something other than the constant sorrow due to Geto's absence.
He started reciprocating your 'kindness'. he would let you rest your head on his lap after a stressful mission and sometimes..he'd rests his own head on yours.
Shoving yourself in his life to replace the sorrows he felt didn't only include platonic relations. Every once in a while, whenever the feelings of loss came back too harshly, all he wanted was to forget. Get lost in pleasure, in anything, just- just please make him forget.
His tears which usually stained his face due to sorrow, now stained his face due to mind-numbing pleasure, his body was yours for the destroying, just please, please make him forget. Even if just for tonight!
" 'toru, use your words now, tell me what you want, hm?" You moved your hand ever so slowly, it hurt. "Just- just please, touch me, ruin me, do whatever you want. I'm yours, yours all yours- Suguru please.
Hah- fuck. He's so lucky he's Gojo Satoru. your gojo Satoru. You can feel yourself growing numb as you let out an unhinged chuckle "Sure Satoru." You try pronouncing his name with that same softness, to replicate that tone of pure love and kindness geto had, but alas, you never truly get it right.
Still, it's close enough for him. as he whines, bucking into your hand. You have half the mind to leave him like this, writhing on the bed, but you never do. This isn't the first time, and certainly isn't the last. You're sure every single fucking time you've seen satoru he's called out his name,
But, as you gaze down at him and as he stares up at you with his pretty blue eyes which spill with tears by the second, you can't help it. Perhaps you pity him, or perhaps you simply don't care if he's using you as a means to an end, since in return, you get to be the one fucking him dumb. And not Suguru, 'cause he's dead. But that's beside the point.
Rocking his world as his vision blanks, eyes rolling back as sweat covers him. You don't mind the pain of when he bites into your shoulder, you don't mind the fact that Suguru's name slips out of him more than your (can be fake) cock
But, for some reason you just can't take it today. Something takes over you, you swear, as you grab harshly onto his neck, gasps leave his throat as he huffs for air. "Wh- Ah pl- EAse- hah."
"say my name." "Wha- AHh-" pressing your hand down harder you're sure it'll leave marks. "Y/n. Fucking say it you dumb bitch." Tears fall down from his cheeks and onto your hand but it only seems to egg you on "Ah- mhm y-y/n please?" As you let go gits of his coughs fill the air as his pink chest rises up and down for air
Suddenly he gasps once more as you push against his prostate, you're far too pleased with him saying your name to let him rest, even to catch his breath.
His cries ring in your ear as his hands scratch onto your skin, leaving deep bloody marks in their wake he stares up at you with his tear stained eyes, mumbling only your name for the rest of the night.
You hope he's learned his lesson, and if not. You wouldn't mind teaching him another one.
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