#and the most liked comment is me explaining who jojo is like OKAY SHOW OF HANDS who fucks w jojo like be srs rn

[orbch]

so, do I look like her?

okay this is either true and understandable, insane, or like “um theres a w2h blog ask already talking about this” so let me tread lightly [full analysis under cut so i don’t scare people with a wall of text.. but like PLEASE READ!]

i feel like jonathan and jojo being the people sock has the closest relationships with (jojo being one of (if not literally) his only friend/s growing up, and jonathan being one of his only connections post death other than, well, his employer LOL) is crazy, especially since they are SO SIMILAR! … IN MY EYES!

like visually? yeah, blond hair, blue eyes, white undershirt in primary design, both kind of a symmetry w/ jonathans middle part and jojo’s pigtails.

their names? both Jo- names, WITH N’s, an account of jojo’s full firstname being joane. [jonathan and joane? that had to be on purpose like come ON!] And their personalities, while definitely different (jonathans described as apathetic, and well, jojo cares very violently about a lot of things) they both are tough to break into, kinda making it hard for anyone to connect positively w/ them on a deeper level

idk, maybe it was very on purpose to give sock a past relationship where he mightve* accidentally had a direct connection to their death, and a new relationship where he has to purposefully have an indirect connection to their death. like DAMN! maybe this is socks eternal punishment, cause id go crazy..

(* emphasis on mightve because im pretty sure sock and jojos full backstory isnt set in stone, but @/welcometohellfilm has talked about possibilities of sock being indirectly linked to jojos death, or setting off a chain of events to cause it unknowingly, in the past. which i thought was interesting!!!)

[mrsgiovanna]

Between the devil and the deep blue sea (Yakuza!Josuke x Reader x Don Giorno)

If you're looking for cinnamon bun Josuke and cinnamon roll Giorno this is NOT it. The reader is a courtesan in this instance, and the Duwang gang (heh) are actually a branch of the Yakuza. (Just a darker, criminal Jojo AU)

This request took way too long, @rubyninja1 here you go love, I hope this is what you were envisioning.

All characters are aged up as this occurs many years after Giorno becomes Don.

TW: Very OOC, yandere behavior if you squint, yakuza x mafia au, suggestive content.

Word Count: 1.7k

Minors please DNI with this post and block the n/sfw tag

You stared at your reflection in the misty mirror, wiping off the steam in one swipe. You had a very important engagement to get ready for, and for the first time since you entered this business, you were nervous. Ever since Giorno became the Don of Passione, the drug trade came to a grinding halt. The rules were adapted to suit his ideals and keep Italy’s youth safe from drugs. But there remained one problem- the activities of the former execution squad… at the best of times, the income brought in was meagre, not really being enough to support all of the assassins, and with the new regime, even those jobs had all but dried up. You had to get creative to generate a livable income, and after many conversations and playing to the Don’s affections for you, you were able to persuade him to allow you and an elite group of escorts to run your business while still being under the protection of Passione.

Under normal circumstances, Giorno would not have allowed you to do something like this, but you had asked him to give you just one month to prove that you would be able to protect yourself while doing the line of work you had proposed, him hoping silently that you would grow tired of that life in favor of a more mundane activity, however, in that short amount of time, not only had you established your business, but you had become the most requested companion, which meant you could accept and deny requests at will- suddenly money was no longer your motivation. It was an intoxicating feeling… being that desired, it was altogether euphoric watching them crumble at your sweet rejections. It was fair game for any man, deciding your rules according to your latest whims, although, one man was above all of those games, being in a superior league all on his own. There was no waiting, or appraising when your presence was requested by Don Giovanna. Most times he would request for you to entertain his associates, close to him so he could keep an eye on you- one of many guardians that you had collected over the years.

Moving into your adjoining room you put on the beautiful silken embroidered outfit and hair ornaments sent to you by Giorno- tonight was a special night as the Don wasn’t just hosting any old Mafiosi, these guests were his esteemed associates from Japan. Over and above the usual treatment doled out to those who met with the don, this visit was more important than most. The head of the visiting group was a relative of Giorno’s, so there was no room for error. You wondered about his convoluted bloodline, hearing murmurs about his origins, but nothing was ever confirmed or denied other than the fact that his mother is Japanese, and nobody dared to push further for answers, not that it mattered in any case, by this time, Giorno had rearranged the entire structure of Passione, and for all intents and purposes it worked, sustainably generating copious amounts of money with minimal bloodshed.

Right, mascara and I’ll be done you mused as you applied the finishing touches to your makeup. No sooner had you finished primping your lashes did you hear a knock on your door.

“It’s open…” you called out from the seat in front of your mirror.

“(y/n), they’re ready with the car downstairs, whenever you’re ready to go…”

“Thank you Ris…” the words left your carefully painted lips, barely acknowledged by your capo when he turned to leave. Well, referring to him as Capo was now redundant seeing that you were an entity in your own right, but old habits die hard, and you still respected him in the same way. He always worried before you set out on these types of missions, remembering a time when you used to be sent out on missions by him. Nonetheless, those days were over now, and you had a new role to fulfil.

There was nobody downstairs when you left, so you exited quietly and steeled your mind on the drive to the private cigar lounge.

“Fugo, I’ll be in my study, please alert me when Higashikata and his associates are here. Also confirm with Risotto if (y/n) is on board for this evening,”

“Of course Giogio, excuse me, I’ll also follow up with Mista on the status of the Capos he’s in charge of- I’ll have feedback for you in an hour,” with a small nod of acknowledgement Fugo took his leave and Giorno went back to examining the documents sent to him beforehand about the strange occurrences in Morioh, Washington, and now Naples. This was the start of something ominous, having a nagging feeling that this wasn’t the last time he would have to meet Josuke. It’s highly unusual for organisations like Passione and the Gokudo to interact in this manner, but this situation was exceptional, and when Jotaro had made contact with Giorno explaining the situation, he couldn’t turn a blind eye, and as such, Josuke was sent in his stead to meet with the young Don.

“Giogio, we should leave now if we want to get there before Higashikata’s group, Mista will meet us there,” with that, the Don and his consigliere had left to receive their guests.

Scents of old leather, expensive tobacco, and even more expensive cologne filled the air when you sauntered in. A handsome man with a pompadour, donning a designer suit, shirt opened a few buttons too low displaying the elaborate patterns adorning his chest offered you a wicked grin from across the room. Just next to him, another ruggedly good looking man with scars across his face nursed a drink while emphatically making conversation with a white haired young man who had a beautiful raven-haired woman draped over him.

“Ah, (y/n), there you are, come on, take this to Don Giovanna and Mr Higashikata,” Maria the head hostess, pushed a bottle of cognac into your hands, the Mafiosi already having gone through a couple of rounds before your arrival.

You approached the rowdy table, offering apologies for the delay, nestling yourself between Giorno and Josuke with a flirtatious giggle.

“Well dollface, it seems good things come to those who wait, so I’ll overlook it… this time,” You were surprised with the fluency at which Josuke spoke Italian- perfect Neapolitan dialect.

“Your Italian is impeccable Higashikata-sama,” you commented, remembering the honorifics you read about. Josuke looked impressed, cocking an eyebrow, taking a sip of the expensive liquor that remained in his glass, readying himself for you to pour him another drink. Watching the exchange, Giorno downed the rest of his drink as well, and took care of the formal introductions, not that it mattered in any case. You were being pulled in all to quickly by the magnetism exuded by the young man, being lulled by the dulcet tones of his voice. I guess this runs in the family you thought to yourself, recalling your first encounter with the don. Giorno continued his conversations with the rest of Josuke’s associates, discussing the occurrences that had brought them all the way to Naples, but kept one eye on you at all times. He wasn’t sure if it was Josuke’s brazen attitude, or your fawning, but the entire situation had annoyed him, which didn’t make sense even to him seeing that you were acting on his instruction… although by this point, you weren’t really acting.

“So Higash…”

“Please, call me Josuke,”

“Okay, Josuke, those are some interesting tattoos you have…” you say, delicately tracing the patterns on his chest with a manicured finger.

“Wanna see the rest of it?” not really waiting for an answer, Josuke unbuttons the rest of his shirt to show you the elaborate design on his back, a large stunning dragon sprawled menacingly across the taut skin, stopping just shy of star-shaped marking on his shoulder.

“Hey, that looks like the same mark on the don’s shoulder…” the young man pulled his shirt and coat back on and eyed Giorno knowingly, to which the don wordlessly replied with a smirk as he raised his glass. Giorno wasn’t always that condescending, but he had the urge to make it known that hewas the one who had been acquainted with you first. Not that any of that had bothered Josuke, he wasn’t one to fall for minor acts of derision when he had set his sights on something he wanted, and right now, that was you. Missing that entire interaction as you refreshed everyone else’s drinks, you returned to the table, however Josuke wanted to take your conversation to another location, somewhere quieter.

You lead him to one of the private meeting rooms, slowly sliding the door shut. Turning around to face him, you noticed the look on Josuke’s face changed, eyes darker, expression demanding your attention, which you were unable to avert regardless of your efforts. This feeling was exhilarating to you, for so long you had mostly been in charge of your encounters, only ever yielding control to Giorno when you were with him.

“Y’know, your don was doing his best to make it known that he’d been here first… I don’t much care for the conquest or doing things first, all that matters is doing it right…” inching closer towards you, a pair of strong arms placed you on the table, hungry lips captured your own, your hands attempting to go into his hair when you were gently reprimanded. As much as this was a job for you, evidence of your excitement pooled in your lingerie and left your lips in muted moans as deft hands and lips skillfully worshipped your body, bringing you to the precipice of ecstasy so many times before allowing you to fall in.

“Good girl… look at you, barely able to think…” Josuke spoke into your shoulder, resting his head there while he waited for you ride out your climax.

Outside your little slice of heaven, your absence was obvious, Giorno having concluded his business, had started to take his leave, not before catching a glimpse of your slightly disheveled form exiting the room. You didn’t see him watching you with a scowl, already having set in motion a plan for your future in both his life and the organization… for now the moment though it seemed ignorance truly was bliss.

[obeymebabes]

hello, i saw your requests open and thought i send in a request! ^^ may i request a headcannon, of the brothers (and if you’re okay with it, the undateables as well.) reacting to a gen z MC? like, one that would curbstomp lucifer for threatening them, laugh at dark memes. if not, that’s okay! 😸

Oh goodness this is going to be chaotic. I'll be honest, I had literally no idea what I was writing but I tried my best :)

> The Undateables (Part 2) <

Lucifer

He literally only asked you to do something simple.

You threatened to curbstomp him.

Absolutely appauled and confused.

What kind of human has the nerve to stand up to such a poweful demon like himself?

Slightly impressed at your fearlessness.

He is too old for your jokes.

"MC, what do you mean by that phrase "ok, boomer"?"

Mammon

This boy wasn't ready for some of the dark memes you showed him.

He didn't realize how dark humans actually were until you showed up.

"Why do you keep saying I need stonks?? What is a stonk?"

He has an overbearing need to want to protect you from yourself.

Why did you keep calling him a simp?

"WHAT IN DEVILDOM IS A SIMP MC??"

Mams is low-key scared of you and your weird humor.

Levi

He absolutely 100% understands everything you say.

All of his brothers think that you are both speaking in a different language.

Only replies to your texts in gifs and memes. Even in groupchats.

He enjoys playing minecraft and laughing with and at you.

"Is that a JoJo reference???"

Says "oof" a lot more now that you're around. Especially in front of his brothers.

Will definitely scream yeet and naruto run out of a room with you.

Satan

Being the bookworm he is, he's every bit of clueless as some of his brothers.

He honestly found it hilarious at how frustrated your humor made Lucifer though.

He definitely adopted calling Lucifer "boomer".

When he was pissed off at something you straight up told him to fight you.

"MC, I don't think it's smart to challenge me."

Was immediately concerned for your health when you didn't back down and actually encouraged him.

He tried to make an attempt to send you memes he found funny but they were all just LOLcat memes.

"What do you mean you have just two brain cells? That's scientifically impossible. Your brain is made of billions of cells all working together to..."

Your little joke turned into a full on lecture. Maybe think twice before popping a dumb joke around the nerd.

Asmo

Despite almost being fluent in internet language, he was not at all on the level Levi was on.

If he was being honest, he was just enjoying that you were having fun.

Every time he mentioned something sexual you'd pat him on his pretty little head and yell "bonk, go to horny jail!"

It would definitely make him laugh but he would always make a snarky comment like "not unless you put me in handcuffs, MC."

When you first told him about the whole femboy hooters idea that was going around he absolutely ADORED it.

He immediately dressed up with a cute skirt he pulled from his closet and threw on an old Hell's Kitchen shirt.

"Finally people are coming to their senses!"

Beel

This poor puppy was so absolutely lost.

What was a Tide Pod and why did you want to record him eating it?

He tried to eat it anyway.

According to him it was very squishy and tasted really bad.

When you explained to him the point he just looked at you with the most confused face.

"Why would you humans eat something that could harm you?"

Every time he would offer you a snack you'd just yell "WHERE'S THE LAMB SAUCE?"

Beel would pause for a moment and try to figure out if you were actually joking or not.

You had to try to explain who Gordon Ramsey was and the whole time Beel just looked like you were speaking a foreign language.

Belphie

It took him a bit to fully grasp your dark humor but he eventually tried to pick it up.

Would point to a dead animal and just say "mood".

He half-laughed when you said you'd pay for him to kill you again.

He was actually worried about you since you kept joking about being super depressed and wanting to die.

Belphie even went to Levi to ask about some of your strangely dark humor.

When you reassured him that you were actually perfectly okay and that you just enjoyed it.

"Wake me up when I'm dead."

[somedayonbroadway]

hii it’s me again and im obsessed with the nerve au- i was wondering if you could do a sprace version, please?

Hi, love! Of course I can! Sorry, this is so late :)

Characters

Racetrack Higgins (@racer) — Vee

Spot Conlon (@kingofbrooklyn) — Ian

Jack Kelly — Tommy

Albert DaSilva (@redhotal) — Sydney

Kid Blink (@ublinked) — Ty

JoJo De La Guerra — Wes

Crutchie Morris — Liv

Oscar Morris — JP

Katherine Pulitzer — Hacker Kween

Okay so…

Race is a foster kid. For most of his life, the poor boy did his best to fade into the background, to be the perfect, adoptable child. He avoids risks, he keeps to himself and the few friends he has. He doesn’t want to lose a spot at the table. He doesn’t want to put himself out there. After all, his parents were everything he wasn’t. They’d had him young. They took risks. They went on adventures. And one day, they never came back.

Even after Race is placed in a good foster home, even after he meets his foster brothers and mother and feels like he’s part of a family, he’s still scared to step outside of his bubble of comfort even though his brothers were a bit more social. Race was adopted right before he started high school. He was fourteen. Jack was fifteen and Specs was seventeen.

Three years later, they were hit by a drunk driver. Specs didn’t make it.

Race’s senior year wasn’t quite the same after that.

Race wants to travel. He wants to go to culinary school in Italy. So he applies. And he gets in. But he doesn’t accept the application. He’s terrified to leave Medda and Jack alone without Spencer. The pain hasn’t quite faded yet.

After seeing the acceptance letter, Race sets it aside before school and goes online instead, stalking a boy online that he’s had a crush on for years. Oscar Delancey. Jack thinks he’s a jerk. Race thinks he’s misunderstood.

That’s when his best friend FaceTimes him. Albert DaSilva has been Race’s best friend since he was first taken into Medda’s place and he is always looking for some extra attention. Race doesn’t mind so much, but sometimes it can get exhausting.

Albert tells Race to stop stalking Oscar on Instagram and, instead, sign up to watch Albert play Nerve, an online game where people get dared and have to perform those dares for their “watchers” for money and fame. Race scoffs at the game and tells Albert that it sounds ridiculous before he leaves for school.

Jack drives him. Race tries to tell him about Italy, but he chickens out. Instead, he goes to school where Albert gets his first dare.

Race’s other friends, Crutchie and JoJo record Albert on his own phone as he runs across the football field during a rally, buck naked. To no one's surprise Albert is suspended later that day. Despite this, while out for milkshakes after school, Albert informs Race that he will still be playing Nerve in hopes of becoming famous.

Jack, who meets the other kids at the restaurant, tells Albert he’s being ridiculous. This causes Albert to turn the tables on Race and tell him he could never be a player on Nerve and then all of his friends vote on a date for him with Jack being the only no. They dare him to talk to Oscar, a simple task that will just push him slightly out of his comfort zone. Race chickens out.

So Albert does it for him, only for Oscar to tell him that he’s not interested in Race. Race stands and storms out and Jack stops Albert from following him, telling him that he just hurt his little brother and better think about what he’s doing next time before Jack decides to punch in the nose.

Race rushes back home where he finds that he never closed the Nerve window on his computer. He watches the video on his screen where he finds out the rules of the game. There’s only three:

1. all dares must be recorded on the player's phone

2. any earned money will be revoked if a player fails or bails on a dare

3. "snitches get stitches."

It’s sketchy as hell but Race has a point to prove. When the question comes up “Watcher or Player,” against all of the boy’s instincts, he makes a decision. Player.

Race is running down the stairs when Jack gets home. He has his first dare. He needs Jack to drive him to Jacobi’s Diner. Jack does, because Race asked him to. That doesn’t stop Jack from giving Race a lecture on how stupid he’s being. Still, Race is determined to prove he isn’t a coward.

His dare is to kiss a stranger for five seconds. Jack records it for him as they eventually find someone reading a book that Specs had read to him once when he was going through an insomnia spell. To The Lighthouse. Race kisses the other boy for a lot longer than he had to and eventually stumbles away says “thank you!” and runs back to Jack.

Jack tells him that he needs to quit now after Race gets one hundred dollars for playing the game. Race almost concedes before he hears someone singing. The boy he’d just kissed walks over to him and sings to him, asking him to run away with him.

Jack realizes it’s a dare and tries to pull Race up and out of the diner, but the boy sits with them and tells him that some kid brought him that book and told him to sit and wait. Jack comments that it sounds like he responds well to puppy commands and starts calling him Spot. Spot doesn’t correct him.

Another dare comes. The watchers want Race and Spot to run away together, run away to the center of the city. Jack tries to stop them. But Race didn’t know how much he was longing for an adventure until that moment.

Race rides with Spot on his motorcycle to a very expensive store in the center of Manhattan where Spot goes in before him and Race is dared to try on a very expensive suit that he looked very good in. He changes on camera. Jack watches him, terrified to look away as he tries to follow him and stop him from getting himself killed. Apparently some kid died in Santa Fe playing Nerve.

Race doesn’t listen to his warnings and continues to take dares with Spot until they are dared to leave the store after their clothes have been stolen. Race says he won’t shoplift, but Spot is insistent. So Race comes up with a compromise.

They run out of the store in nothing but their underwear. Their watchers get a kick out of it. One of them even buys them the clothes they tried on, letting them keep them.

Jack decides he’s watched for long enough and calls someone for help. A dear friend of his. Okay, it’s his girlfriend, and maybe she’s a little older than him, but hey, who’s keeping track? He asks her for access to the dark web and she reluctantly gives it to him. When he has access, he finds all he can on Spot, previously known as Sean Conlon, a kid who played the game in Santa Fe.

He doesn’t seem like an upstanding citizen.

Albert is trying his best to get into the top ten, to win the whole game, but his watchers won’t give him any real dares. He’s out with Crutchie and JoJo when they find out that Race is playing the game. Albert is shocked and a bit jealous at how fast Race is moving up in the game.

Becoming a pair in this game, Race is dared to get a tattoo of Spot’s choosing and, though terrified of getting a tattoo at the wrath of his mother, accepts the dare and lets Spot calm him down with some music while he gets the thing, to later find out that it’s a lighthouse, for To The Lighthouse. After Race manages to complete this dare, the watchers move forward with a dare for Spot. He has to get to sixty miles per hour on his motorcycle while blindfolded.

Race almost bails on him because of it, because he’s terrified, but Spot manages to convince him to help and Race guides him while they get to sixty in five minutes. They barely make it and then they almost crash, and then they kiss, feeling invincible.

Jack can hardly watch, fearing his little brother might die and then his mother calls, asking why the hell money is being deposited into Race’s account and where it’s coming from, so Jack has to deal with that while he’s still trying to look for his brother.

Spot takes Race to a carousel. They mess around on it while Race tells Spot about Specs, about how Specs was fearless, about how Specs pushed him to do things he would’ve never done otherwise. Spot tells him it’s a shame he never met him. He thinks they would’ve gotten along. Race agrees with him before Albert tries calling him.

Albert has been at a party with the rest of their friends. They’re all watching Race play Nerve live on a big screen. He sees Race reject his call. He hears Race call him annoying, frustrating, attention demanding. It hurts. And everyone else gets to hear it too.

Spot suggests they go to the party that Albert’s at to show everyone that he’s not who they thought, to show people that he got a tattoo and his own opinions. However, when they get there, they find that Albert has bailed on a dare after the watchers found out he was scared of heights. He nearly fell from a ladder suspended above ten stories.

He’s pissed that his best friend wasn’t there to talk him out of it. This sparks an argument between Race and Albert. Race eventually tells Albert to sign up and watch him from now on if he wants to know where he is. Then he accepts his next dare, to finish Albert’s. He walks across the ladder only to be met with his big brother who tells him that Spot set him up, that he took a dare to get him to the party to fight with Albert. Race shoves him away and finds Spot, demanding to know if that’s true.

Spot pulls him into the elevator and tries to explain. But Race won’t let him. He’s had enough. He runs out of the building. He finds a cop and tries to tell him about Nerve. He needs someone to shut it down. But he gets distracted by a call from his mother, telling him that everything they had was gone, that their savings had been drained and photos were showing up on her and Jack’s social media page that shouldn’t be. Before Race can respond, he’s knocked out cold by a player who has been around the whole time, someone Race suspected Spot knew.

When he wakes up, he finds himself in a metal cage with the words “Snitches get Stitches” scrawled out on the walls. A computer lights up and tells Race that he is now their prisoner. A prisoner of the game. A flash of Jack comes across the screen. Then one of Albert. Terrified, Race tries to break out only for Spot to show up and pick the lock for him.

Spot explains to Race that he’s a prisoner of Nerve too and that the watchers control his whole life, and not just that, they control his family’s life. His sisters and his mother too. The only money they get is money the watchers give them after they messed with his mom’s job and his sisters’ futures have been destroyed. He explains that they’re going to give Race an impossible dare and that they sent Spot here after him to finish it for him if he can’t.

Down the hall, muffled voices are heard and Race walks into a new room to find Jack and Albert tied up and gagged on chairs and a gun sitting in between them. He’s dared to choose who lives and who dies.

Race is obviously scared and refuses to choose, trying to bail, but Spot stops him, telling him that if he bails, he’ll be a prisoner until the game comes around again. He has to win to get out. So Race takes the gun and aims it at his own head, causing the watchers to tell him to stop. They need someone to control. So Race stops and Spot unties the other boys and helps them out finding a secluded parking lot to drop them off before he rushes off to complete his next dare, trying to make sure he was the one in the finals with Race instead of Blink, the other boy who he was made prisoner with after going to the cops when their friend died playing the game.

Spot takes the same dare that got his friend killed, hanging one handed from a construction crane. He manages to do it, putting himself in the finals.

Jack, Race and Albert pull together and form a plan, calling some backup in and going to The Cloud, a place Katherine often hangs out. He asks her and her hacker friends to try and gain control of the boys controlling the game and she does. Jack takes Albert there after Albert makes a call at a pay phone. They try to hack the game while Jack gets a call from his panicking mother whom he tells to meet him at The Cloud.

Race goes to the finals and is given another gun. When he sees Spot across this mysterious arena, he tries to run to him, having fallen for him over the course of all of these insane events, but the watchers tell them to stop and take their marks. The first to shoot their opponent wins.

Spot tells Race to shoot him in the shoulder. Race almost complies, but shoots the ground, telling him that he can’t do this. He tries to walk away but someone from the crowd says that he’ll take the challenge instead.

Blink jumps into the arena.

Medda gets to The Cloud just in time to watch the whole thing.

The watchers vote for Blink to shoot Race. And he does.

Medda can’t fathom the fact that she’s lost another child.

But Jack just tells Katherine to blow it up as Race falls into Spot’s arms.

Spot begs him to wake up as the anonymous players phones reveal their real names and tell them their accessories to murder. Everyone begins to sign off.

Spot cries over Race, completely horrified and tries to shoot Blink before Race shoots up in his arms, telling him that he was alright, that it was all fake. So Spot hugs him and begs him to never do that again.

But he’s so happy that he’s finally free.

Race immediately calls Jack and Medda and they cry together. So Spot takes him to them.

Jack and Medda encourage Race to go to Italy and Spot and him end up in a committed relationship. Albert and Race makeup and Jack is still overprotective as ever and they heal from the loss of Specs and are able to actually love on.

For more Mood Boards and AUs, click here!

[ordonianhero]

The Rat, the Wolf and the Lion

A LU short between Legend, Twilight and Warriors. Characters are from JOJO’s Linked Universe.

Authors notes: this is a one shot, so sorry for spelling and grammar. I wrote this out as quickly as my brain thought it.

Legend and Twilight set up a scheme to prank warriors in his sleep. >:)

———————————————————————

After a long day’s journey. The group settled camp along a crystal clear lake bed. It was teaming with fish and other wild life. Time and Twilight took it upon themselves to go gather up some fish for the group. Hyrule and wind gathered up wood for a camp fire. Legend spent some time going through their inventory, see if there was anything they may need if they were to come upon a village.

Warriors was showing Wind a few sparing sword moves. While Four was showing sky a few things about native plants and such. Wild was prepping to cook up whatever Time and Twilight brought back. Legend after some time sat down against a log watching Warriors and Wind. “Come to judge us pinky?” Chuckled Warriors as he flourished his sword at Wind. Legend snorted at Captain’s comment. “Wasn’t counting on it. Beside- you aren’t even worth putting rupees on, after the stunt I saw wind pull on Wild.” He snarkily replies. Wind laughed at the statement. Warriors smirked, “well at least I won’t be the one so easily spotted in battle. You’re one giant flag to anything near by.” Legend crosses his arms and huffed. He knew this would happen. Though Twilight had explained the look was temp and would fade over time.

Most of the group had gotten their giggles and jokes out. However warriors still find a way to jab him for it. Legend abruptly got up and went to go check on how the fishing was going. “Yeah well, whatever.” Wind could sense it was still a sensitive subject still. Warriors, paused for a second. He probably over stepped that one. He then was caught off guard as wind whacked him with the flat side of his sword.

Legend sat down hard beside twilight. Time looked over. “Everything okay there?” He asked cautiously. Legend said nothing. Time then let it go, Legend blood boiled with frustration. Twilight could feel Legend’s frustration radiating. Then suddenly as it was there, it seemed to disappear. The calming sounds of the water lapping the lake side. The frogs croaking, birds twittering away. Nature had calmed whatever fury was raging. “It’s beautiful out here.” Legend then spoke. Time nodded in agreement.

Twilight just smiled at Legend. “Sure is.” The the clouds in the sky started turning a purplish pink as the sun started going down. Twilight and Time had managed to successfully catch good amount of fish for dinner. They both stood up, but legend stayed seated. Time looked at Legend and then to twilight. “Here, I shall take our catch to the chef. You two can stick here.” Twilight nodded. He Carly handed over his catch and Time went off to give Wild the fish to cook.

Twilight folded up his rod. Tucking it into his pouch. Legend still sitting, let out a sigh. Then tosses a pebble into the water. Twilight looked around and found a flat stone and flung it in a way it skipped across the water. Before he took a seat beside Legend. “Show off.” Huffed legend. Twilight flinched. “Sorry.” He softly chuckled. Legend softly smiled. They then just sat in silence for a bit. Before Legend let out another, but softer sigh.

“So.” He spoke. “You said the hair color will fade sometime?” Twilight tore his gaze from the water and over at Legend. “Yeah. I mean- you weren’t under the crystal for long. So I am certain it will fade away.” Legend nodded. “Good, cause the captain won’t let up and I got nothing to tag him back with.” Legend sighed, plucking up another stone into the water. A near by by frog croaked.

Twilight shifted his sitting potion, bringing his knees up, feet flat to the ground and leaning back on his hands. “That can easily be fixed.” Legend looked over. “Oh no, you know what happened the last time you schemed rancher.” Legend replied, but he face went into a full smirk. “But, do go on.”

Twilight smiled back at Legend. “So, I was thinking, why not mess with him in his sleep.” Legend’s eyes grew wide and a evil grin stretched across his face. He turned his full body to face twilight. “Oh I like this Rancher. Let’s maybe stick his hand in warm water?” Replied legend. Twilight paused and tapped his chin, “classic, classic. But too simple.” They sat their quietly. Legend bent over with his to hands clasped together, resting his insect fingers to his lips. As he deeply thought. A cricket hopped between the two of them. Stopped. Rubbed its legs together and then hopped off.

“Ah ha!” Twilight states cheerfully with a finger in the air. Legend was slightly startled. A sly smirk splayed across twilight’s face. A look that wild has often worn when he is plotting something wild like. “So, how bout we take the night watch, before dawn. We set up a raft, place warriors on it, and set him out to wake up in the middle of the lake.” Legend was surprised, rancher sure knew some good plans. Assuming being around where he was from, the children of his village- he is not shocked.

“For being stoic rancher, you sure know some evil pranks. I like it.” Chuckled legend, crossing his arms. “What evil pranks?” Came a voice from behind them. There stood the captain. Twilight just smiled and stood up. “Oh, just a few stuff the village children played on me.” Legend smiled in returned. “Shocking, the rancher has some very clever pranksters.” Warriors raised an eyebrow. “Oh. Well uh the old man sent me to tell you two food is ready.”

“Oh good, I am ready to eat.” Smirked Twilight, patting the captain’s shoulder at he walked by. “Same.” Replied legend, as he was about to walk past Warriors. The Captain stopped him. “Look, sorry. I crossed a boundary and I shouldn’t have.” He said looking at Legend with an apologetic look. Legend softly smiled. “No worries. I need to learn to just go with it.” With that he walked on. Leaving warriors looking out at the beautiful sun set upon the lake. He then turned around and followed them back to camp.

Time handed twilight and legend their food as they sat together. He could see a look on the pups face that said Legend and him seem to have good talk. Warriors then came and sat over by Wind and Hyrule. The group all seem happily chattering away, then they all turned to talks of what the plan was for the next day. It then turned to who was to do first watch. “Ah Legend will take final watch together.” Twilight spoke. The group all looked at Twilight, “that’s a unique position for you. Often you like first watch.” Spoke Four. Twilight shrugged. “I don’t often sleep well. So I will just stay up with Legend. Two eyes before sun up.” Time wasn’t ganna argue with him on that. “Okay.”

Once everything was cleaned up. Twilight went off to do one last patrol for the night. He also took the time to find some good logs he could tie together and make a rafted into. He brought them back to Came to tie together. Time was taking first watch that night. Twilight looked at the camp, the rest of the guys had settled to sleep. Time raised an eyebrow at twilight and the logs. “What’s that for?” He asked quietly. “Hm, something to hopefully get me to be tired out.”

Twilight set the logs down in a way to make a small rafted. Time melted his ears and eyes out for enemies. Twilight worked quietly. Using reeds, weaving them into a rope like. Strong and sturdy. Before tying the logs together. Time was rather impressed with the pups random skills. Clearly some stuff learned from his own travels. Twilight then yawned and laid on top of the raft and falling asleep. Time chuckled and went back to his watch.

When it came to Legend’s time for watch. He was woken by sky. Then legend woke twilight. “Our turn.” He quietly spoke. Twilight shifted awake. His hair sticking out awkwardly. “Hm...okay. Let me get this raft to the water and test it out.” Legend nodded. Twilight scooped up the raft and took it to the lake. Legend made sure the camp fire was still going. Twilight quietly places the rafted in the water. He put his own weight on it. It differently wouldn’t sink and tying it together worked.

Twilight sat beside Legend and whispered. “Well he won’t sink at least” Legend chuckled quietly. They sat quietly and took on the watch. As it crept closer to dawn. That is when Twilight got up and quietly went over to warriors. Poked him. No movement. Sleeping beauty was sleeping dead beauty. Twilight scooped up the captain and carried him with his blanket to the raft.

He carefully set him down on the raft and tucked him in. Then kicking off his boots. He bent over and carefully pushed the raft out into the water. He stepped in and eased into the cool water pushing the raft out more. He then stopped And let the raft drift on its own. The watched it for a bit and smirked. He turned around and gently swam his way back to shore. He picked up his boots and made it back to camp where he dried off and sat across from Legend and smiled. Legend smirked tiredly.

As the sun came up, the group slowly stir awake. Legend and Twilight were released from watch. As members were awaking up it was Wind who took noticed warriors was missing. “Oi, where’d the Cap go? He bedding is gone too.” Twilight was busy helping pack up camp. Legend sat beside Four. Time upon hearing the Captain was missing looked about frantically. “Ah, sure he is fine. He may of went off to patrol,or something.” Legend states calmly. The camp then all went quiet as they hear the sound of a large splash and a scream from the lake.

The group all rain to the lake. As they arrived, warriors, drenched and dripping with water, was walking up to dry land. The look on his face was not one of amused. Time could see the raft that Twilight built that night. He shot Twilight and look. Twilight gave him a flustered look and smile. Legend let out a chuckle “good morning sleeping beauty. Wasn’t sure you would wake. So the water was the best alarm clock.”

The group then all laughed. Time eyes both Twilight and Legend, they could tell as much as he was furious with them, he also found it amusing. “Well let’s get you warmed up and fed.” Time states taking the wet bedding and fling it to twilight who caught it. Then lead warriors back to camp to get warmed up. “You two are on laundry duty for a week.” He states as he passes Twilight and Legend. Legend groaned and Twilight just chuckled “okay sir.”

Once everyone was fed and the Captain was dried off, They were ready to hit the road. They cleared up camp and off they went. Warriors walked up to Twilight and Legend and flung his arms around them both. “So, ah this was be a glorious sight of watching you two suffer as you do my laundry.”

“Ah it won’t bother me much. At least I had loads of practice with cleaning up soiled clothing from my days of caring for babies and children.” Chuckled twilight. Warriors huffed and pushed away Twilight. Legend laughed. “Whatever. Warriors huffed before walking off whipping his still damp scarf into Twilight’s face. Twilight and legend chuckled and tapped fists together.

~ fin.

[herzspalter]

So I’ve been having a great time with Jojo and with other people who also enjoy Jojo! But there’s been a few things that have been kind of making me grumpy in the last 2 years since I got into the series, and I’m in a vent mood today!

- I get the same jokes over and over in my comments to the point where it’s really exhausting. I’ve seen at least 5 donut jokes every single week for the last two years - Anytime I draw Jotaro with an animal that is not a dolphin, people say “this should be a dolphin”. I have at least 20 comments like that. Jotaro can interact with other animals. - “milf hunter Kakyoin” comments en masse. Bonus points if it’s used without a hint of irony against any non-hetero headcanons of Kakyoin. Like yeah, you sure showed that non-canon headcanon who’s boss, by mentioning something that’s not canon either. - Anytime I say that Jojo has a lot of homoerotic subtext and imagery, I get at least 4 of the following responses: “It’s not gay, you just want to see it there and that’s why you think it’s there”, which is super condescending and missing the point (also love the defensiveness that a series might have some gay vibes, as if that were a bad thing), and “I don’t think it’s homoerotic, it’s just super manly and fabulous!”, and I don’t understand that point. Like, do you think homoerotic subtext/imagery can’t be manly...? It always pops up every single time and I don’t understand it. - also homoerotic doesn’t mean there’s gay sex on screen, this seems to be a common misconception! - You don’t get people to read the manga if you send them spoiler panels - “This should be with another character instead of this one” Look, there’s some ships, interpretations and depictions in fandom I personally don’t like either, but I avoid those and keep my salt to myself. - Five people called me a normie and that I ruin things because I said Jotaro’s watch line is hilariously terrible - I gave Risotto Nero a slightly darker skin tone because I like how it looks, and some people said this is all wrong and that they were concerned about the canon colours. Jojo doesn’t have canon colours, and I gave Ghiaccio pink eyes in the very same comic and nobody said anything. - A lot of mainly male fans assume I don’t understand the source material when I have a different opinion, or have explained my own jokes to me. - It’s okay to say that something isn’t perfect in the series! It’s okay to say “I don’t like how this was executed” etc, it doesn’t mean the person doesn’t get it or is an asshole, you can like something and simultaneously find that some things in it aren’t that great! And I’m done!! For the end I want to say, most things are super enjoyable!! People have been so so kind and supportive, and it's fun sharing art and seeing people's headcanons etc! I don’t hate people for using jokes that have been done a lot or anything like that! And most important, I don’t want to discourage anybody from enjoying themselves however they want! If you like memes etc, that’s totally okay! I’m just saying these things because I get the same comments 60 times a month when they’re not my cup of tea <3 All these things are honestly very minor, there's just days where they kinda exhaust me <3

[glapplebloom]

You see so much negativity about this show, let’s do something positive.

Original Art used before was by AJthePPGfan

The Catalyst

So I was watching Shadow Streak’s review on Save the Date when I notice a comment being upset that the girls are being constantly saved. I said that its only noticeable because the original focused on more action and had more episodes. If you count, you would probably see the girls being saved around the same amount of time. So I did via a speadsheet. This article was going to focus mostly on this before, but then the next review “Can’t Buy Love” happened.

One of Shadow Streak’s biggest complaint is that he doesn’t like the fact a six year old is having romantic feelings when they shouldn’t. I posted that they did show Buttercup give the Professor “something” for his date with the disguised Sedusa. For most people its likely a breath mint but I bet for others its a little more adult. And not mentioned in the comment is when the original had the confirmed 6 year old Buttercup crushing on a guy and said young adult taking advantage of her feelings. Don’t worry, its more about taking over Townsville.

There are plenty of reasons to dislike the show (Donny for example) but I would like the dislike being because of your taste and proper reasons. So while I could sit here and debunk others reasons (at least the ones that can be debunked), I think it would be better to see something more positive. So here are 10 things I like in the Reboot that would have made the original much better.

1 - Buttercup and the Derbytantes

Its no secret Buttercup is my favorite Powerpuff. And looking at the reboot it seems like Buttercup is the favorite there as well since if episodes aren’t focused on her she is doing something to advance the story. And outside some minor changes (like her wanting to make cash being an extension from her Tooth Knocking Out Business from the original), she hasn’t seen significant changes. But a positive to her and the others to a lesser extent is that they have friends beyond one episode or each other.

All thee of them got Barry, Blossom has Jared Shapiro (who is hit and miss) and Bubbles had Donny (who is a constant miss). But I’m making this about the Derbytantes for two reasons: 1- they’re less awful than the two previously. 2- they show Buttercup having interest outside her sisters. She has a group of friends who gets her. Who accepts her even if she is a Math Genius. And who share in her kind of fun her sisters wouldn’t. It makes Buttercup more than just the Tough one of the group.

2 - Blossom

In the original, Blossom was the least interesting to me. She was basically just the leader with your typical “I’m the leader so you should listen to me” attitude when Buttercup wants to go in. You know how many episodes focused on Blossom in the original? Four: ice powers, her stealing clubs, her hair getting ruined and suddenly losing and gaining confidence. Great for action scenes but as a character it makes her really one note.

In the Reboot, they gave her more to do. With Jared it shows she has a crush and how she deals with it. Her ego gets more explored as she has to handle not being in the right or being as good as she thinks she is. And even outside the 12 episodes focused on her, she has a lot more interactions with her sisters that makes them seem like sisters. One of my favorite moments is how Blossom suddenly acts like Rambo when the Daisy Robot takes over the house. To me, Blossom is a much more interesting character in the Reboot than the Original.

3 - Bubbles

While the Reboot feels like it favors Buttercup, the Queen of the Powerpuffs is Bubbles. When it comes to episodes focused on her, she’s the most in both the Reboot and the Original. Even the final episode of the original was a Bubbles focused one. While the Reboot does make her more airheady than the original at times, there’s one addition they made that not only is a great addition in my book but also perfectly extends to her character: her being a programmer.

From the original we know two important things: she’s creative and she knows other languages. Coding is basically another language and you know programmers can do amazing things. The concept of Easter Eggs was born because a programmer wanted to add something and said thing turned out to be a brilliant addition to prove their program was stolen. This is a perfect fit for Bubbles to show that you can be smart in your own way than to just give this to Blossom because she’s the generic smart one.

4 - The Professor

Him being more like the dumb fathers in animation is a justified complaint about the show. I feel its because he became a butt monkey in the end of the original series (having his voice stolen with the blessing of the Girls, acting like a child when they could fly instead of using his buggy, danced pants) and they decided to play it up more here. But there are moments I feel this Professor is a better father than the original.

There are two episodes focused on the Professor learning about the subject his girls are interested in so he can enjoy it alongside them. There’s an episode of a creation he made for the sole purpose of making sure they can’t guilt trip him into allowing them to stay up all night. And my personal favorite, being so angry he single handedly drove down to Townhall as Blossom is mind controlled because she disobeyed her. Even to the point that he won’t even let the other girls out of the car despite being thrown around. It just shows a lot more love than the original.

5 - The Fashionistas

The strongest aspect of the original are the villains. They are arguably the best part of the original. But sadly besides Morbucks they don’t have a strong female villain that can be put on the same pedestal as the likes of Mojo Jojo and HIM. Sedusa is so one note she usually loses to other people besides the Powerpuff Girls. For the reboot, their new villains don’t have the same spark as the old with one exception: the Fashionistas.

Consisting of the Bikini Sisters, Bianca and Barbarus, these two have a clear theme, unique plans and great personalities that can bounce off each other or other characters. Like feel free to hate the Bridezilla episode but I really loved that Bianca’s reason to break up the marriage was because she felt she would be left alone since Barbarus was the Popular one, the Funny one and the Attractive one. Its a nice dynamic that I think would have been great for the original.

6 - Silico

Despite having the most questionable reason since the show does a bad job telling us things like time, Silico is a good take for a villain that hasn’t been done in the original. Instead of being created alongside them, being jealous of them, or just simply being evil, Silico is a villain because of their actions. Since they destroyed his friends, even by complete accident, he’s going to destroy them.

This also was their attempt at an ongoing storyline in a similar vein as Steven Universe or Gravity Falls: have episodes be episodic and self contained but have clues or moments that would lead up to a later episode. Granted, not the best of said attempts but it is an honest effort to try.

7 - Episodes

Its easy to point out Bad episodes and say they’re not as good as the original, but I think people underestimate those moments when the Reboot not only has a good episode but knocks it out of the park. I could highlight these good episodes and compare them to the original’s bad ones but that is not a fair assessment. But what I will do is highlight three episodes that I feel not only are the Reboot’s best episodes but also up there with the best of the original.

Home, Sweet Homesick: the episode where Blossom discovers that you shouldn’t grow up too fast and enjoy your time as a kid. Bubbles the Blue: you can feel sad and that’s okay. And finally the Octi-Father: the rage you see in Bubblevicious sharpened as a knife and even more dangerous. All without actually throwing a punch. That’s how you know you’re intimidating.

8 - More of HIM

One of the biggest flaws of the remake is the lack of using the other villains. Outside HIM, Morbucks and Mojo, the most the others get is an episode of the Amoeba Boys working for Silico and the Gangreen Gang hustling. And while I do enjoy Mojo and Morbucks in the Remake, I know others don’t. But one you have to agree got a major push in a good way is HIM. This series really shows him living up to his one line: “Why destroy when you can torture with tooth decay” The Reboot also explains somethings weird from the original.

Remember the White Lie monster? How he seemingly came from nowhere and just as fast suddenly gone? The Reboot has a Secret Swapper Monster who was defeated in the same way: confessing. But the major difference is we know the Secret Swapper came from HIM, explaining why it suddenly came to be. This series shows how he can be just as devious as the devil people think he is.

9 - Concepts

Its easy to remake something: just update the graphics and fix the problems here and there. But it is hit and miss when you add something to make it a reboot. We’ve seen hits in Ducktales Reboot and we’ve seen fails in both Thundercats reboots. But while some of the ideas the Reboot of Powerpuff Girls presented are misses, there are some good ideas.

Silico I mentioned above. A 4th Powerpuff Girl as a result of a previous attempt at creating the Perfect Little Girl not working out is another interesting concept. Mojo creating a Robot that can match the girls in ways the Rowdyruff Boys couldn’t. Morbucks possibly being turned good. These are very interesting concepts. The Reboot not making it work doesn’t mean these ideas couldn’t been more successful under better hands. 

Honorable Mention - Lego

Love Lego. Love Powerpuff Girls. Match made in Heaven. Just got to get Morbucks and Mojo.

10 - Inspiration

The one thing you have to give credit to the Reboot is that it inspired people to make stuff about it. Granted, a lot of it being stuff more in favor of the original but there are some great pieces out there about the old meeting the new. Some even highlighting how the Powerpuff Girls has changed over the years. 

You got new, younger fans being introduced to these girls and soon wanting more discovering the originals. You have old fans revisiting the originals to show others how much better these were.You got a reviewer in Shadow Streak looking into each episode of the reboot to give them a fair shot. And be honest, the Powerpuff Girls wouldn’t be discussed as much as it is today if it wasn’t for the reboot.

And that’s my list. I know its easy to dislike the Reboot, but I hope this list helps you understand why it has fans. And hopefully it’ll help you appreciate this when the Live Action Movie of the PPG comes...

[abigailmaitland]

Andi Mack 4B Plots

My 4A Plots

Trigger Warning for depression - nothing too dark, but it is a significant plot of this season.

Extra 4A plot to be nestled somewhere before the finale:

Halloween!

The GHC & Co. trying to decide whether they’re too old to go trick or treating. Intense debate with Cyrus, Andi, and Marty on one side, TJ, Buffy, and Jonah are on the other.

“How can you be too old for free candy?!” Cyrus exclaims.

“I’ve always hated dressing up,” Jonah rolled his eyes.

“Halloween is the best time to practice sewing!” Andi expresses.

“I hate sewing,” Buffy groans. “Besides, I’m trying to put my dentist out of business.” 

“It just seems like none of you want to have any fun.” Marty says.

“I’m on the high school basketball team. I have an image to keep.” TJ crosses his arms.

“Is the image a boring, funsucker? Because you’re nailing it,” Marty teases.

Eventually the opposing group crumbles underneath the pressure of their friends and free candy. Planning their route is also intense - Cyrus definitely has maps of Shadyside and a detailed house list of who gives the best candy with averages he’s kept throughout the years.  

The Crafty Crew joins them for trick & treating. 

Cyrus dresses up as Waldo. 

Andi makes a ‘cereal killer’ costume, including a cereal box skirt, blood, the whole shebang. Even Cyrus groans at the pun (but secretly high fives her). 

Buffy goes as Buffy the Vampire Slayer & Marty goes as Fred from Scooby Doo. Buffy says he was supposed to be Spike from BVS, Marty laughs and says he thought Buffy and Fred were a better match.

Jonah puts those fake vampire fangs in and some fake blood on his face. Buffy chases him around all night. TJ dresses up as a failed math test because it’s the scariest thing he can think of. 

Walker dresses as Miles Morales & Libby dresses as Hawkeye (we deserved a deaf hawkeye!) 

And finally, the episode ends with an intense candy trading session. Lots of smiles, laughs, and friendship/couple moments. Halloween episodes should always be the most lighthearted!

4B.

Episode One.

Bex is laying in bed. She’s awake, but she’s not doing anything but staring. Her phone goes off and it’s revealed to be 3pm. Andi’s calling. Bex hesitates, then answers. “Mom - are you okay? You were supposed to pick me up fifteen minutes ago.” 

Bex shuts her eyes, then opens them again. Suddenly, energy is in her voice. “Oh yeah - you know me, just running late. Traffic! I’ll be there soon, Andiman.” she hangs up quickly, she sighs. Her eyes are distant. She rushes to get ready, throwing on whatever she can, v messy, not caring how she looks.

Next scene Bowie is seen in a restaurant kitchen cooking. They ask him if he can stay late - he says no, he’s got to be at Red Rooster Records for the open mic night, revealing that he is working two jobs to try to start saving, referencing the potential for a second child (as Bex listed financial fears as a main reason).

We see Jonah’s apartment when he invites Cyrus over to hang out. Jonah says “it’s kind of small,” but Cyrus smiles and says “You know, it’s actually cozy. My house can be so...lonely.” Jonah kind of scoffs and rolls his eyes, muttering something about rich kid perspectives. He admits he had to get rid of a lot of stuff, including his old baseball gear and complains that he can’t play his guitar after a certain hour because his neighbors complain because the walls are basically paper thin. “Basically, don’t say anything you don’t want Dave to hear. He’s basically a member of the family at this point.”

Bex is off on the drive home with Andi. Andi’s talking non-stop about school events and how she failed the last project (revealed in the 4a finale) and how she needs to improve, but she feels so out of place in the school. Bex is saying “yeah” and “mhmmm”, barely listening. When they get home, instead of cooking, Bex orders pizza but doesn’t really eat much. Andi starts to get worried and asks if Bex is okay, but Bex just says she thinks she’s getting sick. Bowie comes home exhausted and both him and Bex fall asleep on the couch during a movie that they were supposed to watch as a family.

Cyrus is a little bothered by “the rich kid perspective” comment and tries to analyze how much his upbringing colors his opinions. The next day, he’s talking about it with Buffy and Andi at The Spoon and how he’s worried that he gives off entitled-rich kid vibes. They laugh and say sometimes he’s oblivious and dumb with money, but he’s not entitled. Andi complains about how tired Bowie always is now and then mentions how strange Bex was acting yesterday. Cyrus’s brain jumps to the worst possible conclusions. Buffy has to reassure Andi that everything is probably okay. As a distraction, she talks about how happy her parents are to be back together and shows off goofy pictures of them. She says her father hasn’t stopped talking about her mom in church since she’s gotten back. GHC smiles.

Episode Two.

Bex’s work has started to get a little sloppy and customers are leaving bad reviews. Celia presses into Bex, saying she didn’t invest so much money into this business just for Bex to get lazy. Bex sighs, shakes her head. “Reschedule my appointments for tomorrow, mom. I think I’m sick.” Celia’s eyes widen, as if she suddenly understands something. Bex goes home and slips back into bed. She doesn’t really go to sleep, but just scrolls her phone aimlessly.

Now that TJ is out at school, Cyrus asks him if he’s going to introduce him to his parents as his boyfriend. TJ awkwardly laughs and says “I should, shouldn’t I?” Cyrus nods. “But if it helps, we can have dinner as boyfriends with my parents first?” TJ’s eyes widen. “All of them? At once?!” Cyrus laughs. “No, we can do dinner at one house and dessert at the other?” TJ nods. “Uh, yeah okay.” Cyrus holds TJ’s hand. “Come on, Teej, you have nothing to worry about. They already love you.”

Jonah bumps into Amber in the hall and brings her to a quiet spot in the hallway. He grins and says he’s going to therapy. Amber asks him how it’s going and he shrugs, but doesn’t seem upset. He says “it sucks, but you know...it really does help. I really didn’t like it at first and didn’t talk, but he asked me to play some music the other week and that helped break the ice,” Jonah explained. Amber smiles and hugs him. “Congratulations, Jojo. I’m proud of you.” He asks how she’s doing. Amber says she’s getting there, but that she wished she was a freshman again because she’s struggling with her AP classes, driver’s ed, her job, and her family issues. He said it sounded like a lot, but that he’d try to be there for Amber because she was there for him. Amber nods and says she’ll keep that in mind. Suddenly, there’s a security guard telling them they have detention for skipping class.  At first, Jonah and Amber look at each other scared, then they crack up at the situation they’ve gotten themselves in.

Andi comes home and sees Bowie sitting with Bex in the bedroom. She overhears Bowie comforting her and then hears Bex saying “I don’t want Andi to know…” Andi freaks out, texting the GHC group chat saying something is wrong with her mom.

Episode Three.

Friendsgiving episode! GHC + Crafty Crew all get together at Andi’s apartment a week before Thanksgiving and have a huge feast. Cyrus put together a spreadsheet and organized who brought what. Buffy and Marty have a competition to make the best dessert. Jonah buys store-bought microwavable mashed potatoes. Andi decorates the entire space and Bowie makes the turkey. TJ brings the BEST Green Bean Casserole and everyone bothers him the entire episode to give up the recipe. They give each other updates; like the dinner with Cyrus’ parents went really well, Jonah and Amber talk about how their detention teacher hated them because they kept laughing, Buffy talks about her parents, etc. Everyone also shares traditions their family does for the holiday.

Walker says that his family covers the table with paper and everyone writes/doodles what they’re thankful for throughout the meal. They then hang it up until it’s time to decorate for Christmas. 

Libby says her family go on a long walk after dinner with each other.

TJ says his whole family plays football together before and after dinner.

Cyrus says he has several Thanksgivings and too many traditions to name - but his favorite is his mom’s side, who volunteers first and then have a small meal afterwards.

Buffy says after dinner they decorate for Christmas, which is her parent’s favorite holiday.

Jonah says they play a bunch of different board games and family games.

Amber says that her family doesn’t argue for the whole day - and also watches old home movies.

They ask Andi what traditions her family has. She seems upset and explains that they used to go to pop’s family and celebrate, but now they have to make new traditions without him because he left them. Everyone comforts her. Bowie overheard and tells Bex - they both want to give Andi the best Thanksgiving in the world. Bex tells Bowie that “all this family drama is why I don’t want Andi to know…” 

Episode Four.

Cece takes Andi out for a bonding day, saying that she’s been missing her. Andi says she misses her too. They go to an art museum and have lunch where Andi talks to Cece about not doing well in SAVA and maybe she’s not great at art like everyone thought. Cece tells Andi that when she was a toddler, she grabbed a pack of crayons and for weeks, she wouldn’t put them down. Cece would catch Andi awake at night DRAWING. Andi would fall asleep with a pack of crayons cuddled close to her. She’d color in the car, at restaurants, in the bathtub with bath crayons, everywhere she could. “And that first year you went to camp, I’ll never forget how excited you were about crafts...Andi, I don’t think you’re bad at art. I think you think you’re bad at art which is making you bad at art.”

Andi says “wow…” and knows that Cece is right. SAVA wouldn’t have chosen her otherwise. They go out to have Fro-yo and Cece asks how Andi is doing at home. Andi tells Cece that it’s been weird having Bowie working so much and then mentioned that Bex is acting strange too. She asked Cece if she knew anything about that and Cece nods. “Yes, but it’s your mother’s choice to tell you.” Andi complains that no one’s ever told her anything. 

Cece rolls her eyes and then says “Well I have important news. My dad is moving in with me.”

Andi asks “Wait, why? Is everything okay?”

“He’s okay, yes. He’s still healthy, especially for his age - but,” Cece pauses. “You know, he misses you and Bex. He’s been spending so much time with Mei and Ling and the twins and Ronald, he thought it’d be a nice surprise.” “Yeah, it has been awhile since we’ve seen him, but...he doesn’t need to move in with you. He could just visit, couldn’t he?”

“I asked him too.” “Why?”

“I thought it’d be good to have someone in the house. I know you, Cyrus, and Buffy still have sleepovers there, but it’s just been too empty for too long. I know how important Andi Shack is to you and how important the house is to your mom, so I decided to keep it.”

“Oh. Cece - I’m sorry. I guess I got caught up in my own stuff again…” Andi says, hugging Cece.

“It’s okay. You’re the child, remember?”

Cece drops Andi off. She calls Bex outside and they close the door. 

“Rebecca,” Cece says. Bex avoids her eyes and focuses on the ground, her nails pressing into her skin. You think it’s going to be a lecture, Bex thinks it’s going to be a lecture, but Cece pulls Bex into a hug. “Andi’s worried about you. You need to talk to her.”

Plot B of this episode is Buffy and Cyrus hanging out at Buffy’s house. We’re introduced to Buffy’s father (headcanon: he’s black. I know sofia is mixed, but I think it’d be cool to have men of color in the show). He wears a cross necklace and is clearly religious, but Cyrus never feels uncomfortable mentioning his boyfriend TJ. Buffy’s father treats Cyrus with nothing but love, honestly, and mentions that he’s the son they never had while eating dinner.

Episode Five.

Jonah reveals that he’s gotten a job as a cashier at The Red Rooster. He’s not immediately great at it, which causes a spike in his anxiety, but instead of having a panic attack he’s able to ground himself using techniques his therapist taught him.

Andi’s teacher, the one who was critical about her art, notices a huge change in Andi and her work and compliments her new project, stating that she knew Andi had it in her. Walker, Libby, and Andi all celebrate together at The Spoon.

Buffy & TJ hang out - they play basketball and get to know each other better. “I don’t think we’ve ever hung out without Cyrus,” TJ laughs. “Yeah...I don’t think so? This is nice,” They play H.O.R.S.E, as well as a game they made up where each basket they make, they get to ask a question. The harder the shot is, the harder the questions they can ask.

At home, Bex is pacing the bedroom. Bowie is sitting on the bed. Bex complains that she doesn’t know what she should do or how she should even talk about it. Bowie listens, nodding his head. “You know, when my father was sick, he didn’t want to tell me. He wanted to be strong and proud. And he almost didn’t tell me, but I found his medication. I was terrified because something bad could have happened any moment and it would’ve been a complete surprise to me.” he pauses. “Andi is worried about you and probably thinks something really bad is going to happen and I don’t think it’s fair to hide it. Besides...she’s starting to get to that age where maybe it’ll start to affect her…”

Episode Six. 

Christmas is coming up and the GHC + Crafty Crew go to the mall. They split up into their normal groups; TJ, Jonah, Marty + Walker and Cyrus, Andi, Buffy + Libby. They’re playing Secret Santa for each other so they’re trying to hide the gifts they’re buying and throwing each other off. Of course, they’re also buying gifts for their SOs. 

Secret Santa List -

TJ has to buy for Marty

Jonah has to buy for Buffy

Cyrus has to buy for Jonah

Marty has to buy for Andi

Andi has to buy for TJ

Buffy has to buy for Cyrus

TJ fretting about what Cyrus would want and if he should even do a Christmas gift because Cyrus doesn’t celebrate (he would celebrate non-religious aspects with Buffy & Andi some years)

Cyrus complaining that Christmas is so materialistic - but then also trying to find the best gift to give TJ and Jonah.

But while TJ, Jonah, Marty, and Walker are shopping trouble arises when they’re wandering around a store, picking up different things, putting them down and whatnot. At some point, Walker notices a security guard staring him down. He feels uncomfortable, but knows he didn’t do anything wrong and continues to just walk around the store with Jonah, Marty and TJ. But it all goes wrong when the group tries to leave the store. They’re all stopped by the security guard, but Walker is singled out. The guard says that he knows that somebody in this group stole and that he has his suspicions as to who. The group all look at each other and furiously shake their heads, saying none of them stole. The guard asks Walker to empty his pockets. Walker does, he has nothing in his pockets besides his wallet and house keys. The guard lets them all go with a warning. Walker is embarrassed and angry that no one else had to empty their pockets. The group buy him some food to try to cheer him up and all agree that it was really wrong.

Episode Seven.

Christmas/Hanukkah special.

They all celebrate their respective holidays. Cyrus invites TJ to celebrate Hanukkah the day after Christmas. TJ of course agrees. We see Cyrus’ family celebrate Hanukkah. Andi, Bex, Bowie, Cece, her dad AND Mei, Ling, her husband, Ronald, and the twins celebrate at Cece’s house. Mei and Cece start to argue, but their dad reigns them in. They finally call a truce after their entire lives of competition and decide their feud isn’t worth it. (“What were we even fighting with to begin with?”) Buffy goes to church and celebrates with her family. Marty celebrates with his family; it’s the first Christmas with his step-siblings. 

The gifts they all bought for each other are revealed when GHC + CO get together during Christmas afternoon. TJ gets Marty a joke gift (probably something about always forgetting him), Jonah buys Buffy a bag full of all of her favorite snacks/candy, Cyrus got Jonah an anchor necklace to keep him grounded and a guitar tuner, Marty buys Andi some weird gag gift like a yodelling pickle, Andi buys TJ a Troy Bolton basketball jersey, and Buffy buys Cyrus a mug that says ‘you’re so weird, i like you’ because she knows Cyrus loves mugs.

TJ and Cyrus psyched themselves out and ended up panicking and getting something neither of them really liked. They laugh about it and then realize they should get to know each other better.

Buffy and Marty treated it like a competition. Buffy got Marty a pace tracker that goes on his sneakers, a scrapbook for his future marathons, and those weird toe socks. Marty gave Buffy two of his hoodies, a necklace shaped like deer antlers which symbolizes strength and gentleness, and an NBA video game that they can play at his house. 

The episode is light-hearted and easy, but the whole episode Bex is still just a little off. Bowie and Cece are extra mindful of her. Andi is still really confused and worried. At the end of the episode, when they all get home, Bex sits on the couch and says “Andi...I have something to tell you.”

HIATUS.

Episode Eight.

Special opening similar to the gun-control episode, as well as the anxiety/panic attack opening talking about how mental health is important and if you or a friend are struggling, tell a trusted adult and take care of yourself.

“Andi...I have something to tell you.” Bex’s voice is serious. There’s a lot of tension. Andi seems worried. Bex seems nervous. Bowie has his hands on Bex’s shoulders comfortingly. 

“Mom? I’m scared...are you sick?”

“Yes,” Andi seems shocked and scared at this revelation. “But not the way you’re thinking, Andi...gosh, this would be easier if I was still just your cool, older sister.” because this is the kind of thing that ‘cool, edgy’ older siblings go through. Not parents. “Andi, I have depression. I’ve had it since I was about your age. It...doesn’t go away, but I’ve been on medication since my twenties and it worked great. But, with work stress and everything that happened with Pops, well...it stopped working. I should have been more open with you and everyone and gotten help when it started…”

Andi stops tensing. She sits with Bex on the couch. “Mom...I didn’t know…”

“Yeah, only Bowie and Cece did. I wanted to be the best mom in the world, especially after giving you up for so long. I wanted to do everything and be everything for you - I didn’t want you to have to worry about me or feel like you had to take care of me. I wanted to be strong.”

“Mom, I love you. You don’t need to pretend to be something you’re not or do more than you can.”

Bex hugs Andi. She’s definitely crying.

“I’m sorry I didn’t tell you, Andiman. You don’t have to worry or take care of me ever, okay? I’m the adult. I’ve talked to Bowie and Cece. I’m going to get my medications adjusted and I’m going to go to therapy.”

Andi feels like a huge weight has been lifted off of her chest but it only lasts momentarily. She gets out of the hug.

“Mom, I learned about depression in school…” She pauses. “It can be genetic...what if I get it?”

“Then we’ll help you through it. No matter what.” Bex and Bowie wrap her in a hug again. “You talk to us, though, okay? Don’t hide it like I did.”

PLOT B. Buffy and Marty have a massive fight. This leaves TJ and Cyrus in awkward positions because TJ thinks that Marty is right and Cyrus always sides with Buffy. This leaves Jonah has a tie-breaker and he totally panics and exclaims that this is why he hates relationships. When they realize that he got really anxious choosing a side, they realize they were being stupid and shouldn’t have put anyone in the middle of the fight. They all apologize to him and make up.

Episode Nine.

Buffy’s birthday!

Similar to Bowie, Buffy has never liked huge birthday parties or attention on her birthday. Andi says “Buffy likes attention everyday...except her birthday.” Cyrus and Andi make sure to tell Marty the first of the month that under no circumstances should he try to surprise her. He asks Cyrus and Andi what they do for her birthday then. Cyrus says that they have a Buffy birthday tradition that they’ve been doing since the second grade.

They meet at Buffy’s house for a celebratory breakfast of Froot Loops and chocolate milk because Buffy went through a phase where that’s the only thing she would eat and drink for breakfast, then they walk to school no matter what the weather because on her birthday in second grade, she demanded to be able to walk alone because she was “all grown now” (her parents followed them, just further behind. If it’s a weekend, they walk to The Spoon). After school, they walk back to her house and they play Buffy’s favorite game at the time “Twister” (Cyrus’ least favorite game) and have a silent dance party (at the time, her mother had just come back from war and asked them to not make too much noise). Then, they eat “garbage pizza” because Buffy had just learned the name of it and thought it was hilarious, and her favorite cake. Then, Andi and Cyrus stayed up as late as possible watching whatever movies Buffy wanted to watch.

During lunch, while Cyrus, TJ, and Jonah are getting their lunch, Marty asks Buffy if he can join in on her birthday traditions. Buffy is pretty rigid and likes the traditions as is, but says that maybe they can create their own birthday tradition. Marty comes up with the idea of a three-legged race (Him and Buffy vs TJ and Jonah) and then going out for ice cream - that way, all of Buffy’s new friends and boyfriend can be included before she goes back home to celebrate with the GHC.

That goes just about as well as anyone would think. Hilarious montage, honestly. This is the silliest idea I’ve come up with and yet, I love it. 

Episode Ten.

After school, Jonah and Buffy decide to hang out. They go to a skatepark. Jonah is much better than Buffy - which he celebrates and exclaims “finally!” She’s determined to learn a pop-shove it.

While at work, Bex thanks Cece for supporting her during her depression and tells her that she got her medications adjusted and is starting to feel better. Cece nods and says “I’m really sorry for not supporting you when you were younger. I’m sorry I didn’t believe you.” Bex forgives her.

TJ and Cyrus experience some homophobia both in school and outside of school. Cyrus gets upset and insecure, TJ loses his cool. They sigh and realize that it’s probably something they’ll have to go through a lot - but at least they have each other to go through it with.

Andi, Bex, and Bowie go to Cece’s house to spend time with their grandfather/great-grandfather. During the visit, Bex and Andi brush up on their Mandarin, they play games like dominos, cards, and Mahjong, and they eat traditional Chinese food. 

Episode Eleven. 

Amber got her driver’s license. She surprises Andi & Buffy on a weekend for a road trip. They drive to the town nearing Shadyside and have all sorts of adventures. They take lots of pictures to always remember this momentous occasion.

Cyrus is sick which leaves Jonah, TJ, and Marty alone unsupervised. They decide to have an adventure of their own and have a giant game of “The Floor is Lava” in public. They get kicked out of multiple locations. They end the day by going to The Spoon and having an eating competition to see who could finish their burger, fries, and milkshakes first. Being that TJ and Marty are used to bulk eating, Jonah is definitely the one who gives up and almost throws up.

Episode Twelve.

Walker, Libby, and Andi are preparing for the end of the year project where they could potentially be accepted into the school’s gallery, which is an honor and a party. Andi knows that she can create something amazing - but doesn’t know what she wants to do yet. They’re all stuffed into Andi shack, bouncing ideas off of each other. Walker wants to do a self-portrait vs. how the world sees him, Libby wants to create a sign-language sculpture, Andi is conflicted and has no idea what she wants to create.

Buffy/Marty + Cyrus/TJ double date. Lots of hijinks. They also definitely go bowling and Cyrus tries to bowl without bumpers. At one point, TJ ran to the bathroom and told Cyrus to take his turn (it didn’t matter because he was so far ahead, there was no chance of Cyrus ruining his chances of winning) Cyrus rolls a strike and celebrates. He then tries endlessly to replicate it for his own turns to no avail.

While at work, Jonah is talking to Bowie about life. He says that therapy is going really well and he hasn’t had many panic attacks since. He thanks Bowie for being there for him in the beginning and Bowie says that it’s no problem at all and that he’s glad Jonah is getting professional help. Jonah says that he really looks up to Bowie and tells him that today was career day and that the high schoolers were prompted to think about what they want to do when they’re an adult. Jonah said he has been thinking about pursuing music and wants to join a band. Bowie smiles and tells Jonah that he reminds him a lot of him when he was Jonah’s age. He advises Jonah to join a band, but to do it for the music and not for fame, because when he’s older and traveling, he might regret not being home for big things. Jonah tells Bowie that if he doesn’t do music for the rest of his life, he doesn’t know what else he would do. Bowie shrugs and says “You might not know what you want to do now, you might not know what you want to do when you’re 23, or 45, or 55. Life isn’t a straight line, it’s full of twists and turns. Just follow your heart and listen to The Universe in those times and you’ll end up where you need to be.”

Episode Thirteen.

Andi has decided that her end of the year project will be focused on her family. She decides to create a literal family tree - she crafts a tree and each branch has a picture of each family member. Branches, like Pops and his family’s, are clearly snapped at the base to show that it’s a broken tree and he left. Bex’s branch has the picture of her as a teen after just giving birth to Andi, Bowie’s branch splits into two to show that he was absent for 13 years, but then heavily involved, etc. (IDK. I know nothing about art and couldn’t come up with anything else lol)

Bex starts to participate in her photography club again, has been doing better at work, and has become more involved in the PTA at SAVA again. Bowie asks her if she remembers what they were talking about earlier in the year. Bex says “Another baby?” Bowie nods. “Yeah...I’m ready now.” He grins and tackles her in a hug and lots of kisses.

TJ gets his first A in math class, on the final test to boot, after a lot of hard work, tutoring, and accomodations. Cyrus takes him out on a date to celebrate.

Buffy and Marty are in this episode at some point, probably not a big part tbh. Mostly because I’m losing steam lol.

Episode Fourteen.

Andi made it into the gallery. Her entire family, GHC+, and Crafty Crew turn up to the gallery to see it and they all go to the after party for her. Cece says “I told you you just needed to believe in yourself first…” Bex and Bowie tell Andi how proud of her they are and because they are literally awful at timing, tell her that they’re going to be trying for a baby. Andi has very mixed feelings about this, but Walker interrupts and drags her out to dance and party with everyone.

The night ends with Cyrus, Buffy, and Andi having a sleepover. Lots of hugs, celebrations, and love. They definitely squish Andi when she’s sitting between them on the couch while watching movies.

At the end of the episode, Andi texts Jonah about how mixed she feels about having a sibling. Jonah says he can understand - she feels like she might be being replaced, that he felt that way a couple times. Andi asks, like when? Jonah admits that he felt that way when he saw Walker and Andi at the Bar Mitzvah and that was his first panic attack. Andi said that she had no idea he was having panic attacks that long, Jonah says “well now you know. Sorry for not telling you.” Jonah tells her that he’ll always be there to listen to her if she needs it.

[kob131]

How bad is rwby criticism these days? Cause I know of some comments that go along the lines of “why can’t rwby critics do us a favor and off themselves” I mean holy shit ouch

...

Okay, before I start: That is not fucking okay. Tell me who said it so I can personally lambast them for it.

As for rwby criticism: ... It’s really bad. You know how some people get super elitist about a show, acting like enjoying the show unironically somehow makes them less of a person (being stupid, uncritical ect. with shows like SAO or DBZ)? Well, imagine if 70% of the people who thought critically about the show acted exactly like that.

Seriously, walk onto the comment section of a RWBY critic like Vexed Viewer or Floof Artist and try saying RWBY is...not even good, just not terrible. You’ll get insulted to hell and back. That right off the bat is a TERRIBLE way of going into a show, regardless of personal feelings.

And that’s just the beginning. Critique follows a similar set of morals as debate: you provide evidence or examples to prove your case, you give context to show that you aren’t hiding anything and you don’t lie because...lying means your argument shouldn’t survive. Most RWBY critics can’t follow any of these. Muffin Man Dan is terrible at giving evidence and just expects you to take his word for everything, never gives context and lies a LOT about events that happen in the show. Vexed Viewer can’t give proper evidence to save his life, outright cuts context and conditions his audience so they don’t see lies by omission. FloofArtist...doesn’t even prove anything. Slicksickproductions pretty much just jacks off his hate boner on screen for a few hours. And FMF? The guy who started this trend? Yeah, I have about a three part post explaining in detail why the first twenty minutes is a continuous stream of failures.

Hell, they’ll go as far as to contradict themselves (many of these people scream ‘show don’t tell’ but they either ignore blatant visual storytelling on par with a beginner or outright misinterpret it in a way that screams ‘malicious intent’, they’ll demand less characters and more characters, they’ll demand focus on the world and the characters in the same breath). They also don’t know what basic criticism terms mean (NO ONE has used the term ‘retcon’ correctly. They always use ‘retcon’ to mean ‘against my headcanon.’) 

Not to mention they’ll go out of their way to insult the creators to a personal degree (such as promoting any controversy that happens with RT regardless or how much info is present or treating them like shit  or even using Monty’s name to try and emotionally manipulated the crwby.) Which is kind of fucked up for a normal person to do but as a critic it’s basically the same as taking a bribe for a cop: against everything the word stands for.

Then we also have...hypocrisy issues. I wouldn’t take this stuff so seriously if not for the fact that these guys cannot take what they dish out. FloofArtist and Slicksickproductions have both blocked me despite mocking Gray for blocking them, they call out the RWBY sub reddit as an echo chamber as their own Twitters and comment sections act exactly the same, they’ll mock any critics of them while demanding the CRWBY take their word as law, they’ll call M&K egotistical while acting like their tastes are objective (even I, someone who tries to be objective, don’t do that!), they’ll praise a show while bashing RWBY despite the first show having the same, if not worse, issues than RWBY (JoJo). It also speaks to how uncritical they are of themselves because they can’t look at themselves like they do others, which is pretty dangerous for a critic.

Also, as I indicated before, they rely HEAVILY on misinformation and lies about the show. They all started bashing the ‘Bumbleby’ ship in Volume 6 despite the show not actually confirming it because, guess what, the fandom spread the meme around. Same with the ‘Blake and Yang have no development between each other’ despite their actions the past three Volumes being connected because, again, the fandom spread the meme. Or ‘Ozpin was treated as morally grey despite not doing anything wrong!’ despite the show, in hindsight, not saying that but the fandom does. It’s like the wage gap thing: they aren’t being intellectually honest and are relying on you not paying attention. If not outright lying (*cough* Xion Village Airship *cough*). Which in turn makes the show look SOOOO GOOD because the ‘critics’ can’t even criticize it (which is more incompetency on their part.)

All of this and so much more makes them completely worthless as critics, except as confirmation bias. As for the other 30%: there are like two good critics who do a good job treating the show fairly. The others are just fans who are too soft on the show, but everyone knows how to spot those guys.

It really says a lot that Unicorn of War, someone who regularly makes research fumbles, is praised as one of the best critics when in less...stupid spaces he’d be pretty average.

... Great, now I’m depressed...

[annachronistic]

Cat Scratch Fever

 September 5, 1830

It was a typical summer's night for Joly, Bossuet, and their shared mistress Musichetta.  It had been a particularly hot night, so either Bossuet or Musichetta had left the window open.  Joly, being a light sleeper, took notice of this quickly and got up to close the window.  He did not want the miasmas of the city in this hot weather to drift into their flat.

As he looked out the window, he spotted a small animal in the distance on the Parisian streets.  This was their household pet that had most likely escaped through the window, a tabby kitten named Jojo.  The name Jojo was, in fact, Lesgles' first nickname for Joly before the name Jolllly came about.  However, Joly secretly hated that name, but did not have the heart to tell him that directly.   So he decided to call the kitten Jojo instead so that Lesgles would never call him Jojo again, a rather clever way to get rid of his unwanted nickname.

Once he saw Jojo alone outside at night, he rushed to bring him back to safety.  Joly worried about larger animals attacking or harming the small kitten.  He immediately ran out the door as fast as he could, completely ignoring the pain in his knee, to get where the cat was; he didn't even think to put shoes on.  If anyone would go out of their way to rescue a cat, it would definitely be Joly.

"Come here, Jojo!" Joly said in a cutesy, high-pitched voice.  He then crouched down and whistled to get the kitten's attention.  Joly always thought that baby-talk was more effective for pets.

"You have to come inside.  We do not want a wolf or a big dog to eat you, or a hawk to carry you away in its talons."

But the curious kitten did not want to go home; he just wanted to explore. As Joly came after him, Jojo retreated into a small bush.  So much for kittens and their hiding places.  Joly then rustled the bush lightly to coax the kitten out.  When Jojo left the bush, Joly attempted to pick him up quickly, but had startled the kitten and was promptly bitten on the hand.

"Ah!" Joly winced.  "Do you not like me anymore, Jojo?"

The kitten squirmed in his arms, but Joly knew that if he let go, Jojo would escape again.  Joly readjusted his position and tried to make sure the cat was comfortable, cradling him like a baby as he walked back to his flat.  Joly then went to the mirror to assess the damage.  He had been bitten on his left hand between the wrist and fingers, and he saw that it was bleeding.

"Merde," Joly swore.  Surely an open wound during hot weather would be a recipe for disaster.  He had read in his medical textbooks about people getting amputations after so much as mildly injuring themselves with a cut.  Joly frantically shuffled through his medicine cabinet to find something to clean it.

That had awoken Bossuet, who left his room to check on Joly.

"What are you up to at this hour, Joly?" Bossuet said with some tiredness in his voice.

"I must find something to clean this bite on my hand," Joly said.  "Jojo escaped the house and I tried to carry him back.  Now he bit me and it won't stop bleeding."

"It's okay.  You're okay," he consoled.  "I am obligated to help you find something, because I was the one who opened the window."

Bossuet scanned a candle around the dark medicine cabinet, surveying it for potential items that might help.   Joly stopped him when he spotted a bottle of iodine.

"I think this will help," Joly said.  "Bernard Courtois used iodine to treat wounds as a battlefield nurse."

Joly put iodine on the wound and rinsed it off with absinthe.  But the cat bite still looked bad afterwards.

"I think I should see a doctor," said Joly.

"You really believe your injury to be that extensive?" Bossuet asked.

"It doesn't have to be that extensive in order to be dangerous," Joly said.  "Even minor cuts have the possibility of turning gangrenous and resulting in an amputation."

"You exaggerate," said Bossuet.  "I will go to the hospital with you just to confirm that your hand will be perfectly alright."

~~

It was about 10 o'clock at night, so there were no omnibuses around.   Fortunately, however, the hospital was less than a kilometer away.   About one block in, Bossuet noticed that Joly's staggered gait was more apparent than usual, which led him to believe that his knee was in pain as well.

"Can you walk, or do you want me to carry you?" he asked.

"I can walk.  But I still want you to carry me, okay?" said Joly.

Bossuet carried Joly piggyback style down the road towards the hospital, and on the way, they inevitably cracked some jokes.

"I suppose the only good thing that would happen if I do get my hand amputated is that it would be hard to arrest me.  I'd just keep slipping out of the handcuffs and driving the constables crazy," Joly joked.

"Indeed, but you might still be upset that your hand is gone, so you might cry into a hand-kerchief," Bossuet added.

~~

The doctor examined the laceration on Joly's hand, which was not bleeding as badly as it was initially.

"Your wound is not that severe," said the doctor.  "But I would advise you to prevent it from getting exposed to the miasmas of the summer air, especially in this humidity."

"That's exactly what I was concerned about," said Joly.  "Fortunately, I am not that vascular, so it would be relatively easy to sew the open wound shut."

"May I ask you how you acquired this injury?"

"My kitten bit me," he said.  The doctor raised his eyebrows, trying to prevent himself from smirking at Joly's comment.

"Well we do not typically sew up animal bites, as we do not want to trap their humours in your cut and have them mixing with yours," the doctor explained.  "Once the skin is punctured, animal bites could potentially carry the risk of hydrophobia, although this disease is relatively rare."

Joly's eyes widened at that.  That was something that he hadn't even considered.

"Has your cat been bitten by an animal before?  What is its behavior like?" the doctor asked Joly.

"My cat is eight weeks old and has never been bitten.  He's a typical cat; nocturnal, playful.  There is no strange or aggressive behavior that I know of."

"The I would not worry about hydrophobia, monsieur.  It would be best to keep this wound loosely covered until it heals."

With that, the doctor put a loosely-wrapped gauze around Joly's hand.

That trip to the hospital was not nearly as eventful as Joly thought it would be.

~~

"Where have you two been?" was what Musichetta said when Bossuet and Joly arrived back at their flat.  Jojo had also greeted Joly, standing on his hind legs and putting his paw on Joly's leg, meowing for attention.

"We were at the hospital," Bossuet said.

"Because this little cat escaped and bit my hand when I tried to bring him back in the house," Joly said, petting Jojo and showing Musichetta his gauzed hand.

"You must be joking," said Musichetta.  "You got bitten by a cat, not shot.  Jojo is only eight weeks old!"

"Indeed.  We essentially went there to confirm Bossuet's hypothesis that my hand was alright.  But the doctor said it was a good decision on my part to go to the hospital."

"Oh, you probably felt so special," Musichetta quipped.  "I know how much you like hospitals.  You'd think 'oh my God, people are taking care of me, I'm sick!'.  It's like Muchausen's by Joly."

"My goal is not to make people feel sorry for me," Joly said.  "Although that does happen fairly often, whether I want it to or not.  I'm just that cute."

"Oh my dear Jolllly, you are very witty and cute, but you can be pusillanimous at times," said Musichetta.

"I think not.  I was the one who chased Jojo down and rescued him from the malicious wolves of the nighttime," he said, rather poetically.  "Cats are much faster than they look!"

"Whatever you say," Musichetta said, smirking.

"You're saying that someone who got carried to the hospital at 10 p.m. after getting bitten by a baby cat is a pansy?" Joly said, now realizing how unattractive to women that made him look.  Both Bossuet and Musichetta could not keep a straight face.

"Oh my, that really does make me look pathetic," Joly said, having a moment of self-awareness.  "So if we ever get on bad terms and I move out, this pussycat Jojo will come with me because apparently I am so pussy-llanimous."

[natsthinkitythinkthinkthonk]

Top Five Yuki Kaji Roles

Just starting this, I know I’m going to be leaving out a bunch. To be fair, he has too many (good) roles. Sometimes he doesn’t fit the role (which is the fault of the casting director), but I think he does a good job with whatever he plays.

Not going to lie, this list is influenced by: - How much I liked the series as a whole - Casting decisions - Character development (how much I liked the character) - Other things that have to do with my personal opinion

In this list, I will also not be including any series that I haven’t watched. An exception in this list is Attack on Titan because I have watched a lot of Eren’s pivotal scenes, and I feel like (even though I avoid the horror genre), he still deserves a spot here.

Due to me not watching all the anime he’s in, I will just list the shows that won’t be included on this list because of this reason alone: Haikyuu (Kenma), Guilty Crown (Shuu), High School DxD (Issei), Donten ni Warau (Soramaru), Servamp (Kuro), Black Butler (Finnian), Black Bullet (Rentarou) Jojo’s Bizarre Adventure (Kouichi). 

I also won’t even be mentioning Ao Haru Ride. I don’t like Kou. Voice didn’t match, anime wasn’t my thing, etc. I cringed too much watching that anime. That is all. 

Honourable Mentions:

Walker Yumasaki (Durarara!!)

Ironically, this character is an otaku. He’s so goofy, and I remember hearing his voice and going, “I recognize him.” And considering the fact that I watched Durarara before I really got into voice actors, that’s quite something. He makes a lot of pop culture and anime references, and I can respect that. Walker and his partner in crime Erika are a very iconic duo.

Ayato Kirishima (Tokyo Ghoul)

We just went from a one to a ten, didn’t we? Well, that’s voice actor range. I hated this casting decision at first. I thought that it was bad and wanted nothing to do with that. I eventually did change my mind. Could they have done better? Yeah, but I eventually grew to like it (love is too strong a word).

Naoya Nifuji (Wotakoi)

Back to the pure, are we? Ironically, Kento Itou (who plays Hirotaka) is born in 1988 (according to the Idolmaster Wikia while Yuki Kaji is born in 1985. Anyway, Naoya (sometimes called “Nao-chan” is honestly such a pure kid. He’s kind of bad at video games, but he gives it his all for the sake of others. Watching him just makes you want to give him a pat on the head. His innocence and purity are definitely exemplified by Yuki Kaji who nailed this role despite being a supporting character this time.

Sonic (One Punch Man)

RIP Sonic’s ballsack. Okay, but seriously, that scene was painfully hilarious with emphasis on the pain. He did a good job portraying it (along with Madhouse’s animation which just added the absolute torture on his face along with the jiggle). I thought this didn’t standout voice-wise at first, but I rewatched the scene a few times and have had the whole thing grow on me... as horrid as it was. Here’s the scene.

Meliodas (Seven Deadly Sins)

Okay, this is partially because I didn’t like the Seven Deadly Sins. Ban is a much better character than Meliodas. I didn’t like Meliodas as a character, but it was no denying that he had a good voice actor backing him. Meliodas’ English counterpart was none other than Bryce Papenbrook (who I don’t like). Go figure, I think he portrays the perverted hero quite well even if I don’t like him.

TOP FIVE

5. Shion (No. 6)

I have so many thoughts on this anime that need to be saved for another time. Shion is one half of the dystopian duo (*cough* SHIP SHIP SHIP *cough*). He’s an intelligent sheltered kid at first, but then he gets wrapped into stuff that’s way bigger than him. Shion has a painful “Eren-like” transformation scene. Every protagonist has to experience pain on a large not-human scale, right?

4. Shouto Todoroki (Boku no Hero Academia)

Who can forget that Shouto vs Deku fight? That was full of epicness. I was almost jumping in my seat when I watched it. The “Handcrusher” isn’t always the most perceptive socially (same), but he has so much power... as long as he gets his sleep. He might not have the most emotional range, but he does have a lot of good moments. It weirdly took a while for this role to set into place for me, but now he’s one of my favourite characters.

3. Eren Jaeger (Attack on Titan)

*intense screaming* Yeah, that’s kind of this role in a nutshell. “I will kill all the Titans even though I am one!” It’s not every day where you see a bunch of giant nudists eating smaller clothed what people. There are too many scenes that Yuki Kaji has crushed in this series, and this is probably his most iconic role. He does a lot of stuff to support the show too which I respect. Get ready for season three people!

Bonus:

2. Yukine (Noragami)

Okay, Yukine is already dead, but you can tell that the little dude has been through a lot. Give him a break. He’s kind of witty and childish at times, but a lot of people don’t seem to like this character. This is partially because of how he was introduced to the series. He was bratty at first, but guys, look at his circumstances and where he’s coming from. He lives with a guy who doesn’t pay him. The guy he works for can do whatever he wants and experience little pain whereas he thinks one dirty thought and everyone goes wild at him. Yuki Kaji portrays the emotional pain of this character so well. That’s partially what I missed in the dub. He weirdly has a lot of youth in his voice despite being so old (I think anything over 30 is old). He really put his all into this role, and I really like Yukine and what Yuki Kaji did with this character, and I can’t stress that enough.

Here are some seiyuu event clips. The slipper incident is infamous. Miyuki Sawashiro is a legend for starting that. The cleansing scene was epic and a pivotal moment for Yukine’s character. The last one is a live voice acting session of that scene (Slippers Incident) (Cleansing Scene - Cast Comments) (screaming in real life)

1. Alibaba Saluja (Magi: The Labyrinth of Magic)

It’s kind of hard to find people who have: 1. Watched this show 2. Watched it subbed But if you have, I commend you. I have watched both seasons and reads a couple arcs of the manga (I’m still about a hundred chapters from finishing the whole series). I’m really bad at explaining how much I love this character/role and why, but I’m going to try. If you don’t get it (or even if you do), go watch the show. It’s one of my favourites to this day. Alibaba is one of my favourite shounen protagonists. He’s goofy, makes honest mistakes, and tries his best. He’s similar to Naruto in ways, but I prefer Alibaba because he’s so much more relatable, and he has logic. According to his weaknesses, he gets fat easily. But anyways, this character has been through a lot. He has lost so many people along the way, and his life is a rollercoaster with him just grabbing on and hoping for the best. Yuki Kaji makes me laugh when the story’s funny and moves me when the story’s emotional. He makes the character who he is, and when I read the manga, I still read it in his voice. I can’t see it any other way. I love this character a lot, and I wouldn’t have anyone else voice him. As much as the dub is good, I refuse to watch it dubbed because I have so much attachment to the Japanese voice cast. This was the first non-Pokemon/Yu-Gi-Oh anime I watched. I have a massive soft spot for it. Can I just add how it also does a great job with its female characters? Morgiana is one of my favourite anime characters of all time. Here are some funny moments (part 1) (part 2) Here’s the seiyuu event subbed (part 1) (part 2)

[thebachelordiaries]

Jocks And Finance Bros: Bachelorette First Impressions

Becca, I hope you like jocks and finance bros. 

If not, you’re shit out of luck.

Becca dates one athlete and they beat that one dating preference of her’s to death by casting 18 or so former athletes. Kind of like how they beat “Let’s Do The Damn Thing” tagline to death.

I shouldn’t be surprised, but I am.

A letter to the men on this season of The Bachelorette:

Do you think you deserve this goddess of a woman, Becca Kufrin? You probably don’t. You probably think too highly of yourself to know this.

Maybe two of you will be good enough for her. Five of you may turn out to be decent people, but that’s me being generous. If it’s anything like JoJo’s season, we will have just one or two decent men. ABC producers, please don’t let me down. Oh wait, you already did with the super-short bios. 

This season we have 25 28 men vying for Becca’s heart, or at least a blue checkmark on their Instagram page. At least one of you will get fake engaged on Paradise and six of you will move from middle-of-nowhere USA to Los Angeles and move back home within a year. I’m not sure which guys will do that yet, but it’s always fun to guess!

Anyway, good luck with your 15 minutes of fame!

Signed,

The Bachelor Diaries.

WTF: No Q&A?

ABC did not include the usual Q&A in this year’s cast bios. I’m so offended. How will I truly understand these men if I don’t know what kind of fruit they’d be or what kind of superpower they’d want?

I would boycott this season because of this, but I have literally nothing better to do on Monday nights, or any night for that matter. I’m still going to try my best to roast these men, of course. It shouldn’t be that hard.

Despite no Q&A’s, I will still form my own opinions on these guys. I, like Kanye West, am a free thinker. Go poopidy-scoop yourself, ABC.

Ok, now let’s get to know these men:

Alex, 31, Construction Manager

Alex is the male equivalent of the basic white girl. He likes country music, his dog, the beach and skiing. He probably has “Let’s go on a hike together!” on his Bumble profile and regularly wears a Patagonia dad hat.

Blake, 28, Sales Rep

We already met horse boy Blake on After The Final Rose. He either played baseball or football in college. Thanks for being so concise, ABC. However, he looks like a baseball player to me. While originally from a small town in Colorado, he definitley lives in LA now. He also believes “two people need to be independent in order to truly love each other” so I think that means he’s into open relationships and or will cheat on you.

Chase, 27, Advertising VP

Chase, unlike Blake, was definitley a college baseball player who was apparently good enough to be in the College Wold Series but evidently not good enough to go pro— at least longterm. We also met Chase on ATFR and I don’t remember much about him. He likes “adventure” and the “outdoors” so he’s quite the special snowflake.

Chris, 30, Sales Trainer

What even is a sales trainer? Chris hopes to retire by 40. In this economy? Good luck with that. He is passionate about “fitness” and “health” which is so unique and different. I feel like I really got to know him through that piece of information.

Christian, 28, Banker

Christian is a former semi-pro soccer player who moved to the US from Mexico when he was three. I feel like his picture makes him look like he has a little head, but other than that he seems alright.

Christon, 31, Former Harlem Globetrotter/ Professional Dunker

I spent a good 30 seconds wondering why two guys with the same name didn’t have their last name initials included in their bios. It took another 30 seconds to notice that Christon was spelled differently than Christian. So this dude is a professional dunker in LA. My first thought is that he’d have a pretty good intro video package for The Bachelorette. Anyone want to put money down that he gets one?

Clay, 30, Pro Football Player

Clay was on his way to the poetry slam but somehow got lost and ended up on the Bachelorette. He allegedly doesn’t curse but is a fan of hip-hop music. I think he is the “famous” football player who was in talks to be on this season. Apparently I should care. Never heard of him. 

Colton, 26, Former Pro Football Player

“Hi, my name is Colt and welcome to my Youtube Channel!” That’s the vibe I’m getting from this picture. I’m also getting Blake Griffin vibes. He just looks strangely tan here. Colton may have a job at the Cystic Fibrosis Foundation. I’m curious to know if he has a story as to WHY he is involved with CF. He also lives in Denver and has a dog named Sniper, which is awkward because the neighboring city of Boulder just banned assault weapons.

EDIT: He was the guy who asked out Aly Raisman via public video and they briefly dated. I shipped them so hard. I AM SHOOKETH.

Connor, 25, Fitness Coach

I feel like I’m going to be sick if I hear one more guy talk about how they were “almost” a professional athlete and how much they lo0o0o0ove working out. I’m sadly only at the beginning of this cast list. Someone pray for me. And someone pray that Connor’s eyebrows grow back after that terrible wax job.

Darius, 26, Pharmaceutical Sales Rep

Darius works for big pharma yet claims to be dedicating his life to helping others. Err, okay. He likes to dance and travels a lot so my guess is he’s probably not ready to settle down at age 26 despite his 36-year-old hairline.

David, 25, Venture Capitalist

David looks like every finance bro who lives in West Village and only dates 22-year-old Instagram models. The only difference is that he lives in Denver instead of Manhattan, which by society’s standards makes him more wholesome. He also loves guacamole, but dislikes avocado, which roughly translates to: I don’t cook and eat Chipotle for dinner every night.

Grant, 27, Electrician

The only way Grant is making it past night one is if he shows up fully dressed as a member of the Village People or as Bob The Builder. If not, he has no chance.

Garrett, 29, Medical Sales Rep

Pro tip to ABC: The letter A comes before the letter R in the alphabet. These names are out of order. 

Anyway, Garret reminds me of Ben Afleck in that his face just makes me want to punch him..in the face. Besides the fact that he also works for big pharma, he actually has outdoor hobbies besides “I enjoy fresh air and walking in the woods” like fly fishing and showshoeing. I’m hoping he isn’t a giant jerk because I kind of like him.

Jake, 29, Marketing Consultant

I thought his name was “Joke” at first because I am a terrible person. I think Joke...I mean Jake...is from the same city as Becca. (I’m assuming Minnesota only has one city) I feel like all hot people in cities have this inner-circle where they know of each other, so maybe they’ve crossed paths before.

Jason, 29, Sr. Corporate Banker

Andrew Keegan? I love your work. “Jason” likes sports and singing along to Disney movies. He contains multitudes. 

Jean Blanc, 31, Colognoisseur

I love that ABC took a smart, educated, immigrant with a successful job and gave him a fake occupation on television. Jean Blanc is a cologne connoisseur. I feel like he would smell good. 10/10 would smell him.

Joe, 31, Grocery Store Owner

I feel like a lot of these bios are the equivalent to what it’s like to drive in an Uber. The driver is always explaining to you how successful they are and where they traveled as a way to prove they aren’t some loser driving you around. Joe’s bio screams “Yeah I own a grocery store but also worked in finance before I burnt myself out, so don’t judge me.” Nobody was judging you, but now I am.

John, 28, Software Engineer

John hopes to be the first Asian male to make it out of night one on The Bachelorette. I can already tell he’s better than most of these guys: he works at a start-up in Silicon Valley, likes wine, plays guitar and bakes banana bread. He deserves a rose, dammit!

Jordan, 26, Male Model

Robert Mills, who is like an important ABC guy or something, called Jordan the “greatest Bachelorette contestant of all time.” Clearly he’s trying to make us forget about Chad. Good luck with that, Robert. Definitley not happening.

So Jordan is probably this season’s villain. Whatever, I don’t care. I DO care, however, that his bio is bragging about a mediocre 4:24 mile time and “sprinting to the finish line.” The time was written as “4.24″ by ABC and a comma is also missing from that sentence. ABC, let me know if you want to hire me as an editor. Back to the mile comment: A mile is an endurance mid-distance race. Nobody is technically sprinting in it, unless it’s a tactical race. Puns don’t work if they’re factually incorrect. 

Kamil, 30, Social Media Participant

Kamil works in real estate and is a part-time model, but ABC decided to call him a “social media participant.” He’s originally from Poland but lives in Upstate New York, which is evident based on the fact he’s wearing a denim button-up shirt.

Leo, 31, Stuntman

It’s crazy how fast Alex Bordy grew his hair in a year. “Not Alex Bordy” is a stuntman in LA, which I heard is a pretty sick job. I am personally a fan of his hair. He knows how to tame those curls and probably rocks a great man bun. I would love to know what products he uses.

Lincoln, 26, Account Executive

Lincoln has a lot of things going on in his bio. He moved to Boston from Nigeria as a teenager, went to college in Kentucky and moved to Santa Monica for work. We met him on ATFR and he was super nervous, cute and had an accent to make most girls swoon. I’d say make him The Bachelor but 26 is too young in my opinion.

Mike, 27, Sports Analyst

How come every Ohio sports fan names their dog Riggins? Based on his hair, I’m assuming Mike is a radio sports analyst. That hair on television? No thank you. Hopefully Leo can give him some tips to make his hair look decent. Did you know: Becca’s psycho ex Ross used to have long hair? It was not cute. But I don’t think Becca is going to send the long-haired guys home immediately a la the notoriously shallow Andi Dorfman.

Nick, 27, Attorney

I’m excited for Nick to be on the show because I know him by association. Let me explain: A friend of mine went to school with one of his friends and periodically stalks her social media. The friend is a girl, so I think he’s friends with mostly girls, which may explain why he loves to “brunch.” He looks terrible in this photo. Nick gives me polished, sexually ambiguous vibes based on how he appears on Insta. I also knew he was going to be on the show before R*ality St*ve, which made me feel powerful. It was a rush.

Rickey, 27, IT Consultant

I know of Rickey too. He was a Bodybuilding.com Spokesmodel Search finalist in 2017. Hashtag #rightreasons. I’m not sure how “online personal trainer” translates to IT consultant, but ok. Side note: I don’t think bodybuilders look good in suits so he might go home night one. 

Ryan, 26, Banjoist

Before the “Yanny or Laurel” debate there was the “Ryan or Brian” debate on After The Final Rose. Evidently the answer is Ryan. He’s the new Wells and I could not be more excited to watch this babe on my television screen. He plays at least four instruments and loves to sail. He also screams “family money” but it’s ok, we can mooch off his parents together.

Trent, 28, Realtor

Can you imagine having a child and naming it Trent? This guy never had a chance. He is a realtor and a part-time model (I swear I wrote the same thing a few contestants up) and has appeared on covers of romance novels, but I certainly wouldn’t call him the next Fabio.

Wills, 29, Graphic Designer

Wills is a graphic designer who loves Harry Potter. I see no problem here. Except for maybe his porno-stache.

Prediction corner: 

Welcome to the prediction corner where I never get anything right. Oh, you know what happens because you read spoilers? Please keep that information to yourself. I like to find out what happens on my own.

Without further ado, here are my baseless predictions:

First Impression Rose: The guys who got the First Impression Rose on the last three seasons became engaged to The Bachelorette. If that happens this year I demand a scientific case study to explain the power of first impressions on women. Anyway, I think Ryan gets it.

Season Villain: Jordan (that was easy)

Next Bachelor: Blake (don’t ask me why)

Winner: Garrett (I like him)

Comment below to let me know your early favorites!

[somedayonbroadway]

Totally Off Center

Boy Meets World Masterlist

A/N: Alright, here we are. Part one of Cult Fiction. Please enjoy!

“De La Guerra, good,” Kelly called, tossing down the girls paper on her desk. JoJo smiled. “DaSilva, not bad.” Albert grinned. “Higgins, bad.” Race frowned up at the man, knowing Jack wanted to say more.

But he was quite literally saved by the bell. “Kelly, bell!” he replied, standing to gather his stuff as his classmates started to leave.

Jack managed to get right in his way. “Alright, hold on, hold on,” he stalled. Race sighed but stood still, glaring up at the man. “Ya know… you’re almost a junior in high school now. Have you thought about college, kid? Because—“

“I’m goin’ ta college,” the boy insisted.

Raising his eyebrows, Jack crossed his arms. “Oh you are? Where?”

“Hawaii,” the kid stated easily. “Figured I’d have a better chance outside of the country.” He smirked.

Jack rolled his eyes. “Ya know, kid… there’s a handful of people who care about ya in this world… I’m one of ‘em. So stop blowin’ me off, okay?” he asked, truly wanting to have a genuine conversation with this kid who seemed to only be getting more and more closed off lately. He knew it must’ve partially been his fault. He’d been pushing. But the boy was just pushing him away.

He didn’t like it.

But Race scoffed. “Jack, I got people who care about me.”

Albert tapped him on the shoulder. “Ya know, Tony… I think Mr. Kelly’s right… we got one more year of high school n’ then… what?”

“Well, I wanna go ta Penn State,” JoJo stated, linking her arm through her boyfriend’s.

The redhead smiled at her. “N’ I wanna go where she goes!” he decided, hopelessly in love with that girl.

Race sighed. They weren’t helping this situation in the least. He turned back to Kelly who looked down at him before running a hand over his hair. “Clock’s tickin’, little buddy,” the man sighed. “Ya gotta figure out what ya wanna do—“

“Jack, you’re not my guardian anymore,” Race argued, not liking the words that came out of his mouth, but knowing they were true, nonetheless. “I’m back with both my parents. I’ll be fine,” he insisted, trying to get around the young man.

But Jack stepped in his way again. “Antonio…” he said seriously. Race paused at that. Jack rarely ever used his full name. “Yeah, you’re back with your parents. But they’re busy tryin’ ta fix their marriage,” he reasoned, knowing the boy needed help. He didn’t want to think about what else might be happening there. “So are they,” he added, pointing to the boy’s best friends.

The kid turned to look at them.

“Study hall?” JoJo suggested, looking up at her beau.

Albert grinned. “Makeout?” he countered.

“Albie!”

“JoJo!”

They locked their fingers around each other’s and dashed for the door.

Tony rolled his eyes and faced his teacher again. “Look, you’ve been given four years of security here… but they’re gonna throw ya out soon, pal. What’re ya gonna do then? Huh?” The child had no answer. Jack knew it wasn’t easy to just know the answer to these hard questions, but failing every exam and every paper certainly wouldn’t help. “Look, kid… I’m just askin’ ya what ya wanna do, alright? Think about it, n’ let me know if you want help figurin’ it out, okay?”

The boy’s big puppy dog eyes looked up at him. And Jack finally moved.

The kid didn’t say a word as he left.

And Jack could only watch him walk away.

Just as Race made his way out into the halls, someone stopped him. “Hi…” she greeted, stepping in front of him.

Race smiled sadly. “Hey, Mickie,” he responded, pausing to turn to her.

She smiled at him. “I couldn’t help overhearing Kelly do that number on you,” she stated, glancing back at the teacher who was walking back up to the front of his classroom, looking a bit frustrated.

Race knit his eyebrows together. “You think he was doin’ a number on me?”

“Only totally,” the girl insisted. “I mean, all that stuff about only a handful of people who care about you?” She scoffed and shook her head. “I must have a hundred people who care about me. And they care enough about me not to judge me like that in front of everybody!” It sounded like she was defending him.

The boy couldn’t help it that he liked being defended like that. Not feeling completely down on himself. Like maybe someone else actually did understand. “Yeah… that was kinda embarrassing,” he muttered.

Mickie smiled at him. “You wanna go grab a cup of coffee somewhere?” she offered. “I’m buying, and I promise not to judge you at all.”

With a shrug, the boy decided he had nothing better to do. “Uh, yeah… that sounds great.”

She nodded. “Alright… let's go…”

—

“Welcome to The Refuge,” Mickie smiled as they walked inside.

Race nodded, looking around and finding a bunch of kids just about his age all over comfy looking couches and booths, sipping on coffee and picking at pastries. What he hadn’t expected was for them all to look over at the door and grin. “Mickie!” they all mutedly cried in unison, walking over to hug the young girl.

The boy stood back a little, not knowing exactly what to do and not extremely keen on the sudden attention. But Mickie smiled. And the second that group saw him, their arms were open wide again.

“Tony!”

It was said in the same voice. All at the same time, just as they all came up to hug him. And something inside Race told him this place was off. Something about it was just wrong. But he couldn’t figure out what it was.

It was odd. But Race didn’t stop them. Jack used to tell him hugs weren’t for everyone. Jack loved hugs, though. Only on occasion, but he seemed to always know exactly when was the right time to wrap his strong arms around the kid. This seemed different than those hugs. But the kid didn’t want to offend anybody.

He’d come here to get away from Jack, not think about every word the man had ever said to him.

“Wow, they all know my name… I don’t know if it’s cool or really creepy,” he said nervously as he eventually walked away from the group.

Mickie turned to him. “You have a sense of humor,” she smiled. “I like that.”

“And yet, you’re not laughing,” Race commented, stopping just as she did, his back to the place.

Mickie looked up at him, dead in the eyes. Something about her gaze felt weird. Almost empty. “Laughter is a mask which denies the reality of a situation and reveals nervousness,” she stated easily, like she’d said it a thousand times before.

A small, nervous chuckle escaped the boy. But Mickie didn’t laugh with him which meant she wasn’t joking. So Race carefully got ahold of himself. “S-so, what’s up with the music?” he asked, trying to listen and see if maybe it was just too quiet to hear. But there was none.

“This isn’t really that kind of club, Tony…”

Race squinted. “No music? So what kinda club is it, then?”

Grabbing gently at his hands, the young girl smiled up at him. “It’s more of a… hangout,” she explained, almost scared she was using the wrong kind of word to describe this place. “Me and my friends get together and… talk about stuff.” She began to lead him around the room, waving at the other kids and young adults.

The blond boy looked around the place again. There had to be over fifty people in this place. “They’re all your friends?” he asked, not really believing that.

But she nodded. “Yes. They can be yours too… if you want,” she offered.

Not truly understanding, Tony shrugged. “Sure… I mean, I could always use more friends…” He knew he had friends. Albert and JoJo. Jack, even. But this girl was just trying to be nice to him. “Don’t know if I’m real comfortable with the whole hugging thing, though…” he admitted.

Mickie grinned and squeezed his hand. “Mr. Weisel says, a hug is a burst of pure love!” she recited, looking as though she truly believed that.

“Who’s Mr. Weisel?”

“He runs this place,” Mickie explained. “He is the most remarkable human being I’ve ever met! He changed my life, Tony…”

Race nodded at her, about to ask more before a man came up from behind her. “Hello, Mickie!” he greeted. Her immediate response was to turn around and hug the man. The boy didn’t get it. “Are you centered?”

“I’m centered, Mr. Weisel,” she promised with a smile.

Mr. Weisel nodded and let her out of his embrace. “And how about you, Tony? Are you centered?”

Not wanting to lie to the man, the boy shook his head, thinking back to Jack once again, who was now another person on a list of people who was pushing at him. “Nope… I’m totally off center,” he admitted.

The man nodded. “Well… we’ll have to see what we can do about that…��

With a small shrug, the boy shoved his hands in his pockets. “Good luck to ya…” He watched the man turn to grab a soda from one of the coolers up against the wall. “So you’re Mr. Weisel?”

The stranger smiled at him. “Guilty as charged,” he admitted. He looked kind enough. But something in the back of the kid’s mind still questioned this place. And this man. Just because someone looked kind on the outside, didn’t mean they were.

“It’s a nice place ya got here…” The boy looked around again. “A little touchy-feely at first but… it’s growin’ on me…”

The man popped open the canned soda and offered it over to him. “Well, it just goes to show, Tony, you can’t always go with your first instincts, Tony. You’ve got to give people a chance, Tony.”

Taking a sip of the cola in his hand, Race squinted, feeling that uncomfortable nudge at the back of his brain squirming back to the surface. “You really like my name, don’t ya?” he asked.

Weisel smiled. “Well, there’s plenty of room in case you’d like to move in,” he suggested, gesturing to his place.

That’s when Race took a small step back. He scoffed. “Move in? What, are you nuts?”

“This is where I live, Tony,” Mickie said, looking a little upset at his immediate dismissal of the idea. She turned to look up at him, her adoring gaze finally falling off of Mr. Weisel. “We all live here.”

That’s when it hit him. “Oh… my bad…” Race said, setting the soda down on the counter. “This is a cult…”

Everyone froze at that word. About a hundred eyes settled in on him as if he’d said something offensive. And then they all laughed. Weisel shook his head. “No no… we’re just a place for people who need love in their lives.”

Race shook his head. “Look, I really have plenty of love… but thanks anyways…”

“You’re judging us, aren’t you?” Weisel said, beginning to make a circle around the space, making sure to touch the arm or leg of each individual inside.

The boy didn’t know what to say. “What?”

“The way your teachers, your family, and everyone else in your life judges you,” Weisel reasoned.

The words made something inside of Race burn. “Yeah…” he said. “I don’t like that very much…”

“Because?”

“Because maybe they don’t really know me at all…” he stated, a sort of guilt settling in his chest at that. But maybe it was true. Maybe he was just another charity case to the DaSilvas. To Jack. God knows his parents hadn’t taken two second to try to understand him.

“Well, why don’t you get to know us before you judge us?” Weisel offered, looking around at all the kids who were watching him like he hung the moon. “If you do that for us, we’ll do that for you,” he promised.

The kid looked around and shrugged. “Seems fair,” he stated, smiling over at Mickie.

After all, what did he have to lose?

[loviswriting]

Jojo’s Bizarre Adventure: Bizarre Beach! Torn Between Scylla and Charybdis!

JJBA part 4 fan fic. Chapter 5: Torn between Scylla and Charybdis!

Summary: During his stay in Morioh, Jotaro needs to come up with a subject for his doctoral thesis in marine biology! Strange happenings in the waters of Morioh beach piques Jotaros interest, making him investigate strange sightings of a mermaid, followed by injured surfers! In hopes of finding a subject for his thesis he teams up with Kishibe Rohan and Joseph Joestar to solve the mysterious happenings! Is it the work of an actual mermaid or is there a Stand user lurking around the corner?!

Number of chapters: 9

Chapter 1

Chapter 2

Chapter 3

Chapter 4

Chapter 5

Chapter 6

Chapter 7

Chapter 8

Chapter 9

Total word count for all chapters: 12 749.

Chapter 5 word count: 1525

Authors note: this is my first fan fic, I tried my best and hope you will enjoy it! You may also read it on my Ao3: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20937995/chapters/49778429

Rohan eagerly looked around the water’s surface which had become calm just a few moments ago.

“Did Jotaro defeat the Stand user…?” he quietly said to himself. “No,” Jotaro said, suddenly sitting in the boat, soaked. “WOA!” Rohan almost fell overboard, “When did you get here! What happened?” he asked, shocked to see his friend suddenly appearing out of nowhere. “Just got here. Quickly, take us to that coast guard boat!” Jotaro pointed at the coast guard patrol about fifty meters away. “Okay, so what did you discover?” Rohan asked as he floored it and drove away from the area where the starfish were, getting them out of harm's way. “Not one, but two Stand users. Both are starfish. One can manipulate water and rocks, potentially long-range. The other a short-ranged power Stand in the form of a sea monster, but also with a remotely controlled form in the shape of a mermaid consisting of… sea life scrap, with the ability to create an illusion of beauty around it.” Rohan's eyes lit up, “Magnificent! Bizarre! My head is being filled with ideas! I need to sketch them down as soon as possible! But… did you defeat them?” Jotaro shook his head, “No. Their motive for attacking is still unclear. I believe they have been randomly given Stand powers; they are most likely acting out of animal instincts. That means their intention is not to do harm, but rather protect themselves. It might be them, and not us, being in danger here.” “I see, then we would violent them by getting rid of them, which may not be the optimal solution,” Rohan replied, waving to the coast guard patrol as they approached them. “Indeed,” Jotaro said and took out the map Joseph had written showing the Stands location, making a circle in it approximately around the starfish area and then proceeding over to the coast guards handing over the map, asking them to keep people from getting close to this area due to hazardous currents and dangerous sea life. That explanation seemed to satisfy the coast guards, now having an explanation for why having seen a boat getting caught in a sudden whirlpool. A moment later back at the shore, Jotaro and Rohan met up with the exhausted Joseph. “Hehe, good job out there,” Joseph said and gave a thumbs up, putting his coat back on, “I had a feeling something like that would happen, so I asked for paper and ink to be able to aid you from the beach!” he winked at Jotaro and Rohan. Jotaro smiled, “I knew you still had some tricks with you, impressive old man,” Jotaro gratefully patted Joseph on the shoulder. Jotaro and Rohan proceeded to explain the situation to Joseph before leaving the beach to find Josuke so that Jotaros wounds could be healed up and rid of the poison. Jotaro was now one step closer to solving this bizarre mystery, but now knowing the mermaid was not real, he was also one step further from finding a subject for his thesis.

Jotaro was back at the beach the next day resolved to find a solution to this, but with little hope for his thesis, preparing for utter academic failure and future life as just a simple fisherman. He had asked Rohan to accompany him once again this time, as he realized his powers would be necessary to shed light on the starfish Stands mysterious behaviour. “Ahoy, Jotaro-san,” Rohan cheerfully greeted Jotaro as he arrived at the pier where Jotaro waited with a rented boat. “Rohan,” Jotaro greeted back, “Today we’re going to solve the mystery regarding why the starfish are attacking people.” “Alright, so what is the plan?” Rohan curiously asked. Jotaro got into the boat and gestured to Rohan to come with him, “We’re both going underwater today,” he took out a duffle bag that was stashed in the boat, opening it to reveal scuba gear, “As I understand your ability does not affect yourself so I brought this.” Rohan gulped, “It can affect me but it wouldn’t work well this time, the ink would just wash off me and I would… drown,” he said reluctantly but quickly switched mood, “Drowning would, however, be a great experience for my series and creativity, hmm…” “Just put on scuba gear, Rohan,” Jotaro said already tired of Rohan's stupid comments about gaining new experiences that didn’t make any sense. Rohan shrugged and started to put on the gear, getting in the mood to become wet. “So why am I going down with you? Weren’t those Stands pretty dangerous?” he asked. Jotaro nodded, “Yeah. But with your Stand, you can write a commando into them that makes them understand and learn human speech. That way we can ask them what their motive is for attacking people.” “That’s a good plan… But what if they’re actually out there to kill us?” Rohan asked hesitant. Jotaro shrugged, “Depending on the situation we either escape and regroup or kill them first.” “Solid plan,” Rohan did not think it was a solid plan but had faith in Jotaro being able to handle this. The boat's engines fired up with a roar and they cruised out towards the area where the starfish resided, now marked with warning buoys to keep people away. They arrived at the spot and Jotaro killed the engines. “Let’s go,” he said and jumped in with a splash. “Ugh...” Rohan grunted and jumped in after him. The duo swam down towards the area where the Starfish where both of them summoning their Stands by their sides so they could communicate with each other and be prepared for an attack. They needed to get close to be able to use Heavens Door, but getting close also came with the risk of being attacked. It did not take long before the tentacle monster and the tooth monster appeared, Jotaro engaged the monster with tentacles, “Use Heavens Door on the other one while I keep this one occupied! Ora Ora Ora Ora Ora!” Star Platinum started to launch punches towards the tentacle monster, keeping it busy. Rohan swam towards the tooth monster, dodging its shooting rocks as well as he could, although he was not as agile as Jotaro when it came to this. He saw an opening, “Heavens Door!” his Stand pierced through the toothfish Stands defences and opened the starfish up like a book leaving it immobilized for the moment. Rohan was ready to start writing as he also managed to read a bit of the page, “Shit! Jotaro, the starfish, they have-“ but he wasn’t fast enough. Suddenly the tentacle monster moved away from Jotaro around his side, away from its previous range and launched a blow at Rohan, sending him away and cancelling the effect of Heavens Door. Jotaro swam up towards Rohan, who quickly collected himself as he had managed to parry with Heavens Door just in time. “How?!” Jotaro said angrily, pissed off at the starfish. “The starfish! Since yesterday, they have found a way to move!” Rohan shouted and pointed towards the rock beds where the starfish previously laid. Both the starfish now floated upon a rock each in the water, moving towards them. “They’re moving by using the tooth monsters ability to create currents! They are on rocks riding on currents in the water! Also, I managed to read their Stand names... They’re Scylla,” Rohan pointed at the tentacle one, “and Charybdis!” then pointing towards the tooth one. “Great, this makes things so much harder…” Jotaro replied as they swam away from the Stands. The Stands seemed to chase them in a specific manner and not at random, which Jotaro quickly noticed. “I think they are trying to get us out into deeper water, away from their colony.” Rohan looked around him through the water and nodded, “Yeah, the water looks darker up ahead... I am running out of steam though, this is too much swimming for me,” he started to get exhausted. Suddenly Scylla and Charybdis stopped, which Jotaro and Rohan did not notice at first until they noticed something was different about the movement of the water. “The Stands, they have stopped!” Rohan said as he looked back, “And they have been preparing another attack!” Just as Jotaro turned around to take a look, he was met with a huge underwater wave that pushed the both of them further out into the water, but he managed to grab Rohan with Star Platinum just in time to not get separated. They hurled through the water for a while before ending up above the surface. “We’re far away from the shore now…” Jotaro stated looking towards the beach that was now far far away. “And far away from the boat! We’re at a disadvantage here!” Rohan backed up against Jotaro, “Any plan?” Jotaro thought through possible strategies, not seeing any good solutions, “We have to fight them and defeat them. I take Charybdis as my Star Platinum is the fastest of our Stands.” “And I go after Scylla, with its many arms I might have a higher chance of hitting it with Heavens Door… Let’s go.”

[literal-fand0m-trash]

Georgia on my Mind Part 9: Cherokee Rose

Note: I do not own any of The Walking Dead characters, but I do own Georgia May Grimes. Please leave comments and enjoy.

Summary: AU. Georgia is Rick’s oldest daughter from a previous relationship. This is the story of how she survives the zombie apocalypse, fight walkers, bonds with her new family, and finds love. (Is that too cheesy?)

Part 1   Part 2   Part 3  Part 4   Part 5   Part 6   Part 7   Part 8

Life lesson: when the slightly unstable guy in your group gives himself a buzz cut, it’s usually a bad sign. When Shane walked outside the next morning with all his hair shaved off, I knew things were about to get ugly. T-Dog, Glenn, and I were out gathering rocks to use at Otis’ funeral that would be later today with Maggie and her younger sister Beth when Shane came out and slammed the front door behind him. I shot a worried looked over at Glenn who looked back at me and shrugged. I turned my head suddenly as I heard the sound of a motorcycle in the distance and knew that the rest of the group was coming.

“I’ll go tell Dad that everyone’s here.” I said putting the rocks I was holding into the wheelbarrow and went inside. I walked into the room and saw Carl was awake on the bed and Lori and Dad were talking to him while Hershel examined him.

“How is he.” I asked quietly.

“Fever’s gone, the swelling in his abdomen is almost completely gone, and he’s wake. Seems like he’s going to be just fine.” Hershel smiled.

“Dad, everyone is just pulling up now.” I said gently and Dad nodded and stood up, following me out of the room.

“Any luck?” I asked as Daryl threw the kick stand down on his bike and he shook his head.

“How’s Carl?” He asked as Dad went to tell the rest of the group what was happening.

“Good. It got close last night, but they were able to get the bullet out.” I said crossing my arms and blinking back tears.

“And you? Ya look like death warmed over, girl.” Daryl teased and I thought I saw a trace of a smile on his face.

“I’m okay. Dad and I are the same blood type as Carl so we gave a lot last night and none of us have really slept.” I explained. He grunted and turned to walk over to the rest of the group and I followed close behind.

Carol came up and hugged me, “I’m so glad he’s going to be okay. We were so worried.” She said.

“Thank you so much. It was a long, scary night, but he’s gonna be fine.” I confessed pulling out of the hug.

“What exactly happened?” Dale asked.

“Hunting accident. That’s all- just a stupid accident.” Dad explained. Then he launched into the full story of what happened.

As soon as everyone had a minute to settle down Hershel called us all over to one of the largest oak trees on the edge of the property to have a funeral for Otis. Since we couldn’t bury his body we all took turns stacking rocks on top of the area that would have been his grave. The whole ceremony was peaceful and beautiful. Hershel had put on his Sunday best and was performing a small service from his Bible. I had never been to church before, but I respectfully followed everyone else's lead and tried to participate.

“Blessed be God, Father of our Lord, Jesus Christ. Praise be to Him for the gift of our brother, Otis. For his span of years, for his abundance of character; Otis, who gave his life to save a child’s, now more than ever, our most precious asset. We thank you God for the peace he enjoys in your embrace. He died as he lived, in grace.” Hershel prayed, “Shane, will you speak for Otis?” He asked.

I looked over and saw that Shane looked a shade of grey and he stammered out, “I’m...I’m not good at this...I’m sorry.”

“Please, you were the last one with him. You shared his final moments. Please. I need to hear. I need to know his death had meaning.” Patricia begged through her tears. I felt a few of my own tears escape; even though I didn’t know him, he saved my brother’s life and it broke my heart to see his family so hurt. Dad wrapped an arm around me and rubbed my shoulder.

“We were about done. Almost out of ammo. We were down to pistols by then. I was limpin’. It was bad. Ankle all swollen up. ‘We gotta save the boy,’ see that’s what he said. He gave me his backpack, he shoved me ahead. ‘Run,’ he said. He said, ‘I’ll take the rear. I’ll cover you.’ And when I looked back…” Shane trailed off then he limped forward towards the wheelbarrow full of rocks, “If not for Otis, I’d never made it out alive. And that goes for Carl, too. It was Otis. He saved us both. If any death ever had meaning, it was his.” He said placing a stone on the top.

……….

A few hours after the funeral Daryl, Dad, Hershel, Andrea, Shane, and I were gathered around the hood of one of the cars with maps spread out, trying to find the best way to look for Sophia.

“How long as this girl been missing?” Hershel asked.

“This will be day three.” Dad said. Growing up in law enforcement, I knew that if you didn’t find a missing child within the first 72 hours of them going missing the chances of finding them and of finding them alive were slim and I couldn’t help but worry that having walkers around cut that time in half, but I tried to keep my hopes up.

Maggie walked up with a large paper and unrolled it on the hood, “County Survey map, shows terrain and elevation.”

“This is perfect, we can finally get this thing organized. We’ll grid the whole area, start searching in teams.” Dad explained.

“Not you. Not today. You gave three units of blood yesterday. You wouldn’t be hiking five minutes in this heat before passing out. And your ankle, push it now and you’ll be laid up for a month, no good to anybody.” Hershel scowled Dad and Shane before turning to me, “You shouldn’t be out there either.”

“I only gave one unit and we can’t be down three people right now. I’ll be fine.” I said.

“Ya sure? Ya don’t look so hot and I’ve seen ya push yourself too much ‘fore.” Daryl swarned.

“I’m fine.” I promised even though I didn’t feel fine.

“I’m gonna head back to the creek, work my way from there.” Daryl said.

“I can still be useful, drive up the interstate, see if Sophia wandered back.” Shane suggested.

“Alright, tomorrow we’ll start doing this right.” Dad said.

“That means we can’t have our people out there with just knifes. They need the gun training we’ve been promising them.” Shane said.

“I prefer you not carrying guns on my property. We’ve managed so far without turning this into an armed camp.” Hershel said.

“All due respect, you get a crowd of those things wandering in here…” Shane said.

“Look, we’re guest here. This is your property. And we will respect that.” Dad said and he pulled his gun out of his holster and put it on the hood of the car. I reached around me and pulled mine out of the back of my jeans and set it down. I would feel safer with my gun, but I still hand my knife strapped to my hip and my bow and quiver full of arrows so I wasn’t too upset. Shane pulled his gun out last and set it on the hood as well.

“First things first: set up camp, find Sophia.” Dad explained.

“You know I hate to be the one to ask, but somebody’s gotta. What happens if we find her and she’s bit? I think we should all be clear on how we’re gonna handle that.” Shane said.

Dad looked down for a moment, “You do what has to be done.”

“And her mother? What do you tell her?” Maggie asked.

“The truth.” Andrea said.

“I’ll gather and secure all the weapons. Make sure no one carries till we’re at the practice range off site. I do request one rifleman on lookout. Dale’s got experience, so does JoJo if it’s okay with Rick.” Shane said.

“Our people would feel safer, less inclined to carry a gun.” Dad explained and Hershel nodded, “Thank you.”

“I should make a run into town. There’s a pharmacy a mile up the road. I’ve done it before.”

“You should take Glenn with you. He’s our go-to-town expert.” I suggested. “I’m sure you don’t need help, but an extra pair of hands can’t hurt.”

“Alright. Thanks, JoJo.” She said and she walked over to where Lori and Glenn were setting up tents, leaving me, Dad, and Hershel at the car.

“Hershel, my best friend used to live on a ranch and I would help her out sometimes. I’m sure I could help with the animals and other chores while Maggie’s out.” I offered.

“Thank you very much, Georgia. You can go ask Beth and Patricia what they need help with. Be sure to take it easy.” He said. I looked over at Dad who smiled at me before I went inside.

I walked into the kitchen and saw both the women I was looking for in the kitchen discussing today’s tasks.

“Hey Beth, Patricia. Maggie’s going on a run to the pharmacy and I have some experience working on a farm. Did you need any help today?” I asked.

“Thank you so much for offering. That would be wonderful. If you’d like you can go gather the eggs in the chicken coop and bring them here then get some water for the cattle and horses. Let me know if you need help finding the well.” Patricia said.

I nodded and grabbed a basket that was on the kitchen table and tied my hair up in a top knot before walking towards the barn.

“Hey JoJo. What are you doing?” Maggie said running up and standing between me and the bar.

“Um, I was going to gather the kitchen eggs.” I answered.

“We don’t actually use this barn, the chicken coop and all the animals are by the stables over there. Daddy doesn’t like anyone going in that barn, it as a lot of dangerous farming equipment.” Maggie said.

“Oh, okay. Thank you. By the way, where is the water well?” I asked.

“It’s just out in that field. I gave Dale all the directions earlier. I gotta go saddle up and help that poor city boy figure out how to ride a horse.” Maggie said and she ran off towards the stables. I stood frozen for a minute looking at the barn for a minute and I had a very ominous feeling settle in me.

I followed Maggie over to the stables and went to the left of it where the chicken coop was and stooped under the short door, there were at least fifteen chickens in the coop and I began to search through every nest and in the end had about twenty eggs in my basket. I ducked back out of the door started walking towards the camp and set my basket of eggs down on the front steps of the porch where I saw my dad sitting and Daryl walking in our direction.

“Daryl, you sure you’re alright on your own?” Dad asked and I went and took a seat next to him on the stairs.

“I’m better on my own. I’ll be back before dark.” Daryl promised and he kept walking.

“Be safe,” I yelled out and he waved off my request.

“Hey, we have a base now. We can get this search properly organized now.” Dad said.

“Ya got a point or are we just chattin’?” Daryl angrily asked turning to look at us. I stood up and grabbed the basket and brought it inside. I smiled at Patricia as I set them down on the table.

“I’m going to check on Carl before I take care of the water. I’ll just be a minute.” I said and Patricia nodded. I walked into Carl’s room and sast down next to him right as he started to stir.

“Hey, Carl. How are you feeling?” I asked.

“Okay. Where’s Sophia? Is she okay?” He asked quietly.

I froze up at the question, not sure of how to answer, “You should get some sleep.”

“Okay.” He muttered before drifting off. I stayed in his room for another moment before going outside. I walked back over to the stable to grabbed some buckets for the water and say Glenn with a pair of binoculars staring at something.

“Hello, farmer’s daughter.” Glenn said in a sing song voice.

“Glenn!” I shirked and he jumped up in the air and whirled around.

“I wasn’t doing anything!!” He yelled.

“What weren’t you doing?” Lori asked as she walked over.

“Nothing.” We said at the same time. Lori looked us and shook her head before reaching into her back pocket.

“Here’s your list.” She handed Glenn the paper. “And um...there’s one other item. I wrote it down separately. It’s personal, if we could be really discreet about it.” Lori said.

I threw my hands up, “I don’t want to know.” I said and I went to go find Dale to help me with the wells.

“Hey Dale.” I said walking over to him once I spotted him. He and T-Dog were walking to a field with a wheelbarrow full of buckets, “Mind if I tag along? I’m suppose to get water for the animals.”

“Well, we’re going to the first well that supplies the house, but we’ll show you were the other one is. Would you give us a hand?” Dale asked.

“Sure.” I said as I walked beside the two men. We got the the well and T-Dog set the wheelbarrow down and Dale set up the bucket so I walked over to the pump and started pushing up and down.

“Say, man, you say there’s a snowball's chance we’ll find that girl?” T-Dog asked.

“For the first time in my life, I’m betting on the snowball.” Dale said.

“Yeah. Me too.” T-Dog said. “Do whatever we have to, I don’t care if I have to comb the woods like Rambo or fetch a pail of water. Everyone kicks in, does there part.”

I laughed a little as I listened to T-Dog then I noticed Dale standing on the edge of the well, looking in. I bent down and grabbed the ladle out of the bucket and went to take a sip of water. Suddenly Dale ran over and knocked the ladle out of my hand and I looked at him in shock.

“I wouldn’t drink that if I were you.” He warned, “JoJo, go back and grab the others.”

I ran over to the camp and rounded up Andrea, Glenn, Lori, Shane, and Maggie and we all gathered around the well and looked in at the walker who was walking around, growling at the bottom of it. It’s skin was bloated and wrinkled and from being in the water for so long.

“How long you think it’s been down there?” I wondered.

“Long enough to grow gills.” Andrea said.

“We can’t leave it in there. God knows what it’s doing to the water.” Lori said.

“We got to it out.” Shane said.

“Easy, put a bullet in it’s head. I’ll get a rope.” T-Dog said.

“Wow! Wow! No!” Maggie said.

“Why not? It’s a good plan.” Glenn said.

“No, it’s a terrible plan!” I said.

“I’m with Maggie and Georgia, if that thing hasn’t contaminated the water yet, blowing its brains out will finished the job.” Andrea said and I rolled my eyes when she used my full name. It took everything I had in me to not turn around and slap her.

“They’re right. We can’t risk it.” Shane said.

“So it has to come out alive?” T-Dog asked.

“Well...so to speak.” I pointed out since the walker was technically already dead.

“So how do we do that?” Glenn asked.

……….

“I stand corrected. The first plan was fine, this is a terrible plan!” I cried out as Dale and T-Dog tied a canned ham to a string and lowered it into the well.

“He’s not going for it.” Dale said after a minute.

“Maybe ‘cause a canned ham don’t kick and scream when you try to eat it.” T-Dog guessed.

“He’s right. There’s a reason the dead didn’t come back to life and start raiding our cupboards.” Lori said.

“We need life bait.” Andrea said looking at Glenn.

“What! No! What exactly is the plan? You want to lower Glenn into the well and then what? You still can’t get him out. Wet skin is that wet it easier to peel and break and that thing is decomposing! You try and get it out of the well it will bleed into the water!” I yelled at her.

“No one asked you!” Andrea snapped.

I looked over at Glenn and saw that he wasn’t protesting and stormed away. I wasn’t going to watch him die over a plan that wouldn’t work if he’s not even going to try and stop tem from using him as bait. I grabbed my buckets as I left and went to the other clean well further out and filled it then marched to the stables and gave the horses and cattle water. I screamed and threw my bucket across the stable when I was done and slumped to the floor feeling defeated.

Maggie ran through the stable in tears a minute later and I lifted my head off the floor, a second later Glenn followed after her.

“What happened?” I asked.

“Exactly what you said would happen. We had to kill the half that made it to the surface. I don’t think she’s ever had to deal with that.” He said then he continued running after her. I picked myself up off the ground and brushed the hay off of me before walking back to our base. On the way over I passed a flower garden outside of the farm house and thought it might be nice to brighten Carl’s room up with, I saw Patricia working in the vegetable garden and walked up to her.

“Hey Patricia. Mind if I cut some of these flowers and put them in Carl’s room?” I asked.

“Of course you can.” She said, “The garden shed is just over there for some scissors and you can use the basket for earlier to hold them.”

I went over to the front porch and found the egg basket from earlier then went to the gardening shed and found some sheers before I knelt down in a bed of flowers and sighed a breath of relief. It felt good to be kneeling in the dirt surrounded by the beautiful things in nature. I got to work cutting a few different types of flowers I thought would look nice and loading them into my basket while humming, I wasn’t must of a singer, but that doesn’t mean I can’t love music and once I was finished I stood up and brushed the dirt off of my jeans before going into the kitchen and filling a glass with water. I walked into Carl’s room and saw Dad and Lori sitting with him and I immediately could tell I was interrupting something.

“What are those for?” Lori asked.

“I got them in the garden for Carl.” I said setting the makeshift vase on the nightstand.

“That’s very sweet of you JoJo. You wanna sit with us for a bit?” Dad asked.

“No, that’s alright. Everyone should be back soon, I’ll see if any of them need help.” I said walking out. As I walked out I heard the sound of hooves and looked down the road to see Maggie and Glenn on horseback and Glenn was wearing a stupid smile on his face.. They rode up to the front of the house and Maggie climbed off with several bags in er hand from the drug store.

“I’ll put the horse away. Glenn why don’t you help me?” I asked and he nodded still looking lost in a dream. We stood on the inside of the horses so we could talk.

“I win.” He said simply.

“Win what?” I asked.

“Win at getting the person I like first. Maggie and I had sex at the pharmacy.” Glenn bragged and I stopped dead in my track.

“What?” I asked.

“Yeah.” He said dreamily.

“You’ve got it so bad.” I laughed as I led the horse I was leading into the stable, “Go, go to your new woman. I’ll finish up here.” I said and Glenn smiled and shot off like a rocket back to the house and I laughed.

I minute later I heard footsteps enter the barn, “Did you forget something or did she kick to you the curb already?”

“What?” A voice that was not Glenn’s asked and I turned around as Daryl came over to me and just looked at me for a moment before holding up a single beautiful flower.

“What this?” I asked taking the flower from his hand.

“It’s a Cherokee rose. I know that girls like pretty crap and I thought you might like it. Ya know, since it’s pretty...and you’re pretty” He said kicking the ground and looking anywhere, but at me. I smiled and tucked the flower behind my ear before getting up on my toes and giving him a kiss on the cheek. As I pulled away I saw his eyes were wide and his cheeks were stained red. Then he shook his head and whipped the kiss away and grumbled as he walked away. I took that as a victory for me.

[sorayahigashikata]

Chapter 13: "Death is coming!"