#and the horrible life he was a part of
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so yeah, what happened to ash is super tragic and unfair, but what happened to Shorter, is like, the most horrifying thing that could happen to anyone and the only thing worse is the entire rest of the narrative where ash survives it
#that was his best friend#literally horrific#this is the worst story of all time#why do i watch this#banana fish#ok but literally the consequences of shorters death affect the entire rest of the narrative#it happens in ep 9 yall#ep 9#and then you start wondering#where did all this start#could it have been avoided#or were these poor kids all just swept up#in the horrible machinations of evil men with power#like it didn't start when ash met that man in the alley#he was watching his guys bc dino was involving them in all this#ash didn't hand the drug over because it was related to griffin#and because he wanted his freedom from dino#and the horrible life he was a part of#which all started because he was assaulted at age 7#and griffin went to war#and suspected the wrong guy#it's all so horrible
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TBOSAS has me thinking about how Finnick was likely one of the only people alive who knew even some of the story of what happened in the 10th Hunger Games and after. It’s apparent that Snow or the Capitol in general buried any record of the 10th games and Lucy Gray to save face.
However, who knew all of Snow’s darkest secrets and dirty laundry? Finnick. It’s reasonable to assume he probably learned at least part of the story. Not only that but Mags won the 11th games, directly after Lucy Gray’s Games. It is canon that there wasn’t much coverage of the games in the districts but I’m sure even if she didn’t watch them there were likely rumors about it during the next game. And when Snow reappeared as the president she likely remembered his role. And as Finnick’s mentor and mother figure she probably told him a lot.
There’s no real point to this information but I just think it’s very interesting that despite how hard Snow worked to bury his past it probably still lived on. And despite his efforts to control, oppress, and abuse the victors, it was one of these victors who knew his dark past. It was one of the people he tried to control that eventually gained an upper hand over him and helped play a big role in his downfall.
#el rambles#tbosas#the ballad of songbirds and snakes#finnick odair#coriolanus snow#thg#the hunger games#obviously i’m obsessed with the way katniss basically haunted him and brought his past/worst fears to life#but that’s been well discussed#and i think it’s interesting that a tribute who he viewed as less than human and he treated so horribly#also played a part in bringing his worst fears to life
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I just realized some people are confused about events in the alluded to past in Mouthwashing, particularly about how long the crew has been working together.
The only person who is truly new is Daisuke and it’s why his dynamic with the crew and role in the story is very unique and somewhat distant. Curly didn’t just get Jimmy this job on the Tulpar, he got him the job with the Pony Express. He’s been his copilot for probably a couple of years but still not as long as they’ve been friends. None of them are new with the freight industry, Anya and Swansea especially have been doing this for years, together.
Jimmy is the newest on the regular crew, maybe just a few assignments, but it’s not his first time working with them. I think it’s just something important because this isn’t just one bad mistake that snowballed with giving Jimmy the job. None of them thought Jimmy would do anything, no matter how off-put by him they could’ve been, since he hadn’t done a thing since being there. Generally unpleasantness isn’t a crime and he’d be aware of that.
It was a festering thing and a sort of forced trust they had to give him that he knowingly took advantage of. He was the black sheep and still a wolf under the wool. He expected when he lashed out, that he had been there long enough for it to be looked over completely. Got too comfortable in the space he inserted into and did a lot of damage with his claws when he felt he was going to get shaken out.
#I think acting like if Curly just didn’t give Jim the job this wouldn’t have happened is underplaying that they’ve all been working for PE#for a bit and that Jimmy got comfortable enough to do something horrible like#a lot of factors made the trip being out the worse parts of them but Jimmy was slowly letting his worse parts show and I think people assume#that this was one a few mission he went on with Curly and that he advocated for him completely when it was more likely#he pulled some strings so Jimmy could work right under him and stay out of trouble with a decent job and it back fired cause Jimmy is just#not a good person like I see people acting like his breakdown and choice to crash the ship was because this was probably one of the last#chances to fix his life and he couldn’t admit he fucked up soemthing literally handed to him so badly and cruelly#I think people forget that predators like Jimmy rarely do anything the first day. or week or month or year#they ingrain themselves into the schedule and dynamic and build a sort of stability that make it harder to knock them down or push back#he has Curly’s trust as the co pilot and as a friend#Swansea doesn’t like him but doesn’t trust him and Anya is just wary initially#he doesnt even attack her at the start of the trip it’s implied it happens after the psyche evals and when she confides in Curly how#patronizing he is to her and her position. he’s retaliating against a perceived slight to his stability to him it was pure act of power and#anger because he’s at his core an avoidant bully who can’t take responsibility#mouthwashing#mouthwashing game#jimmy mouthwashing#I didn’t want this to be a Jimmy post but it is#more so about how abusers like Jimmy work but I digress cause most of it’s in the comments
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close enough
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happy birthday to my little traumatized old moth
#art#bug fables#leif bug fables#vi bug fables#kabbu bug fables#leif bf#vi bf#kabbu bf#chompy bug fables#guys I’m gonna be real with you I don’t normally like fluff all too much#but any story in any form that has a birthday party that goes horribly wrong but still goes well in the end?#immediate love. take my heart. just take it. you can have it.#I don’t know WHAT it is but it hits different#like aw yeah look at all this angst and violence and horrible mean characters and OMG A BIRTHDAY PARTY!!!#threw this together very quickly but I could not let this opportunity pass me by#come gawk at my inconsistent art style. what is going on with it.#legit I think the only part of my art style that’s remained consistent over the last few years is those little lines by the eyes#life without Little Lines by the eyes is a life I cannot live#still can’t draw kabbu tho yikes he perplexes me
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Yes I love me some Siblings dynamics ✨️✨️✨️
I like to think that Aki's (adoptive) parents bought a better headstone for Miki ;w;
#ken went into his teen angst phase too early like chill bro youre only 10#honestly I want to make ken to look up to shinji like he did in p3 movie#but also i have horrible humor and I think a 10 year old beefing with a man who's almost at legal age is so funny to me#no shinji did not commit oopsie to ken's mom i have put all the doom narrative traits to minako in this au lmao#which is why she is kinda pissy that her lost twin is living his best angsty teenager life#while she has to eat processed food because Liz cant fuckin cook even if here life depends on it 😭😭😭#but anyway my back hurts from drawing Aki's part#maybe joining miki in that cool underground club wasn't a bad idea after all#asukart#00s highschool au#persona 3#shinjiro aragaki#kotone shiomi#minako arisato#persona 3 reload#persona 3 portable#persona 3 femc#akihiko sanada#ken amada
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irt poverty/homelessness + alcohol use (esp with @butchfeygela‘s tags on my post)- people really underestimate the function that substance use/alcohol use can have for someone who is unhoused. being unhoused is boring, cold, painful, + lonely. substances can allow the 8 hours panhandling to get the $45 you need for a motel to fly by. alcohol reduces your perception of the cold + can knock you out whben you can’t sleep. substances can help you cope with the physical deterioration from malnutrition, constant stress, + sleeping outside. substances can provide social connection with others who you would otherwise not enjoy or help you cope with being alone.
not only that but- many unhoused people are stuck in a seemingly inescapable position. the pathway to financial stability or even housing is difficult or even impossible. in the wake of that hopelessness, the downsides of substance use start to seem insignificant. arrest? you’re getting arrested anyway for sleeping outside, peeing outside, standing in the wrong place, etc. physical danger? you’re already beat the fuck up, anyway, right? loss of relationships? you’ve lost most people already. inability to keep a job? nobody will hire you + you can’t stay employed, anyway, because you have no car + no shower.
perhaps for you or me, the cons of heroin use or binge drinking nightly greatly outweigh the pros. that isn’t the case for everyone. if we are really serious about ending overdose/addiction, we need to start looking at giving people lives worth recovering into instead of shaming them for their own hopelessness.
#i had a long talk with my dad once about how#my brother sank into so much financial despair#that he was never going to be able to find#a livable job or housing (eviction record#plus bad credit plus#arrest record ofc#he was going to be forced into poverty for the rest of his life#the only job prospects he had were menial shit jobs#he once worked at one of those chicken butchering places#it was the only place that paid him a living wage but he got fired for relapsing#his only options were to go to school part time + try to pass with his dyslexia which made him essentially unable to read#then work a horrible shitty job the rest of the time#while paying atlanta's outrageous rent prices#plus who is he gonna room with?? all his friends are opioid users!#while he paid back all the debt he accrued from going to rehab#then MAYBE after like 6 years of school he could get a decent job#but his credit would be in flames for years his eviction record there for years#his arrest record + lack of driver's license limiting his employment..#sorry but i would have probably given up at that point too#not to mention his interpersonal + familial relationships up in flames + the shame#of the things he did while using hanging over his head#the only family member who didn't think he was an irredeemable fuckup (me) living a thousand miles away + about as broke as him#substance use#harm reduction
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Y’know I think all of Char’s divorces could be explained by him being aroallo and trying his best to be alloallo because he doesn’t realize he’s aroallo. But also I’m not sure the world is ready for rep like that
#because like. it’s an extension of his he tries to conform to people’s beliefs thoughts on who he should be#so at military school everyone thinks he and Garma should be a power couple. so he does his best to be that kind of boyfriend with Garma#and then the aristocracy thinks he should have an awkwardly younger bride that he marries for political power. so he seduces Haman#and then Reccoa thinks he should be a domineering presence in her life but at this point it’s been YEARS and he can’t keep up the act any#longer because he DOESN’T feel that way!#and nobody really expects him and Amuro to have a relationship so what they have both isn’t romantic and is more genuine than any other#relationship Char had! but he’s already burnt himself out so horribly trying to be who everybody wants him to be. so he goes and he makes#his own faction so that he’ll be able to have death by Amuro#but like. it’s too easy to read that as “oh aroallo people are evil and manipulative about their relationships’’ instead of “Char Aznable#is always trying to play the part someone else wrote for him and that causes massive tragedy when he reaches spots where he CAN’T play that#part because he doesn’t have those feelings and a lot of pain would’ve been solved if he hadn’t had to act like he did have them’’#this I say#mobile suit gundam#char aznable#meta#<- I guess?#oh damn I made a typo in that first tag. how he not his he
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forever thinking about how nothing will be the same as before this situation and george won't be the same ever again. i just hope he will take of his mental health after this, no matter what it takes, even if it means he will be far more distanced
anon this is seriously making me suicidal
on a real note i mostly worry about how this will impact his ability to form connections and make relationships with other people. like imagine feeling too cautious to go near non-ccs because oh god what if theyre a secret fan or what if they put something online and ‘expose’ me. but then u can’t go near fellow cc’s either because you cannot tell who has genuine intentions and who just wants to fuck you over later down the line. and none of this is even shit fans like me should even be thinking about i cannot stress enough how none of this should’ve been public and i feel so fucking bad for him that he’s had to be so publicly vulnerable after being so private his whole career.
on another note i suppose dnf will be trauma bonded for life now
#i see many people saying he’ll distance himself from his community and maybe he will#but this isnt even a situation that fans caused it was another cc#and yes many fans overreacted and took part in horrible things out of fear and panic initially#but george is genuinely so kind he is SO kind and i don’t think he would hold that first response over peoples heads#whether thats his fans or his ex-friends#i hope he’s taking care of himself and i hope he knows he’s allowed as much time to process as he needs#i was gonna say a good idea would be for him to go home for a bit and see his family but then j remembered his fawking OPPS would be just#down the road#fuck his stupid life#anyway#discourse#just in case#tw george situation#nova.ask
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mumbo should be allowed to kill
#my post#more often i mean. set him loose#he’s horrible at it. it’s part of the charm#proper mumbo enrichment#he’s soooooo stressed when he gets to kill but he’s also been waiting for this moment his whole life at the same time.#he should get to do it more#he has the time of his life every time#mumbo#mumbo jumbo#trafficblr#secret life smp#last life smp#i realise i didnt specify ‘in minecraft’ and i think im gonna keep it that way? i think if he told the cops ‘im mumbo jumbo’ theyd let him#go*
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This excerpt from the letter Elminster sends to God!Gale post game has had me in a sadness chokehold for DAYS. I knew Gale was young when he was scouted as a new potential Chosen but he was EIGHT??? Eight years old. A child. A baby. And he was accidentally destroying property with fireballs that young? That boy was a sorcerer. The way that one moment changed the trajectory of his entire life.
Elminster watched a little boy cry over ruined flowers and so many years later finally feels regret.
#and I hope it haunted him til the end of his days#this all but confirms my hc that Gale was born a sorcerer#what human 8 year old is casting fireball accidentally or otherwise#his wizard training refined his innate sorcery and made him a ‘prodigy’#which isn’t to say he isn’t deserving of that title because he is incredibly intelligent and has A Way with magic#but I do think he was More than a wizard#and I also think that’s what saved his life when the orb happened#it ate through his innate power which satisfied it enough to spare Gale’s life#at least long enough to get through that first horrible year#it’s dire again by the time tav meets him because it’s burned through all of Gale’s natural magic#so the man tav pulls out of the portal is for the first time JUST a wizard#(how long does Gale mourn that lost part of himself without knowing what he’s mourning)#anyway#I sad#bg3#baldur's gate 3#gale of waterdeep#mine
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BRAIN IS EVAPORATING, BUT... what if the reason Chris knew Jim as Sam's brother is because Chris, being the first officer of the Enterprise with Robert April, was there to oversee Jim coming back to his family after the Tarsus event, and met Sam as a result??? And they kind of hit it off keeping in communication??
#star trek snw#chris pike#sam kirk#especially if robert knew george well then maybe his son sam was there to thank them for bringing his brother back#strange new worlds#star trek the original series#like of course he could have just mentioned jim in passing easy#and probably did various times#but maybe sam became good friends with pike when he was trying to figure out how to cope with his brother's trauma?#and the feeling of helplessness that can give to a person who wasn't there#to see his love one suffer and keep them safe???#I can see pike and sam in general bonding over that#but pike not necessarily wanting to keep in contact with jim because that was a horrible part in jims life#and while jim seemed to recover from it swiftly and bravely#it just didn't feel right to approach the kid#my brain is on the tarsus shit so much recently 💀💀💀
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it's so disappointing that we didn't get more of tomura and afo interacting after that huge revelation about afo being involved in his life from the very beginning. he had his dad giggling and kicking his feet. he even encouraged him to have another child. tomura thought afo finding him that day on the street was a coincidence, but it wasn't. none of it was, he was even given the quirk that killed his family then told he wanted every single one of his family members to die and that was born twisted for years after. he even thanked afo for making him for who he is today in previous chapters!
I wanted there to be an actual encounter between them where he is distraught that the man who he thought was his savior has been planning his downfall since before he was even born. I wanted more of afo telling him to his face how he has meant nothing to him and his usefulness begins and ends at him being a possible vessel for himself, and how he's never had any control over his life. then have tenko argue back against his words. to finally stand up to everything afo has tried to ingrain in him. to cast aside the name of tomura shigaraki which was the name he gave him and tell afo how he doesn't need him anymore. that he finally sees him for the pathetic man he truly is. I want to see afo's reaction to losing control over him permanently. izuku would also be helping him through this encounter as well, might write a fic about it tbh.
oh well best I can hope for now is tenko discussing his feelings about what was revealed in 419, that is if he survives. I have a feeling something will happen that will bring him back in some way based on how only the name tomura shigaraki was said but not tenko which is an important distinction to make. a tomura dies, tenko lives situation if you will.
#tomura and a41's dynamic is one of my favorite in the series and I feel disappointed that we didn't get more towards the end#at least he played a part in ending him#idk about ya'll but I always imagine post canon tomura to have complicated feelings towards a41#because he did genuinely care for him at one point and despite everything done to him perhaps a part of him would miss him#even though he did all these horrible things to him that was still the man who he grew attached to and was there for him-#when no one else was#at least that's how I imagine he would explain the feeling...#maybe it's just projection on my end 💀#I also had many thought of toshi taking care of tenko post war and tenko also taking care of toshi because I buy into the toshi is paralyze#from the waist down theory and would need extra help adjusting to a major life change#he helps tenko through his ptsd and talks with him about the things he experienced#I never got my tenko/all might interaction this is how I cope#I never even got a tenko/yoichi interaction *sobs*
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after drakon
#fanart#dragon age#dragon age origins#dragon age: origins#tabris#alia tabris#warden tabris#zevran arainai#finished this part of the game tonight and agh#its always been my hc that the warden does experience some Moderate To Severe Torture at drakon#and esp for alia freeing anora is super triggering and awful#because she running thru the mansion she ran thru after being kidnapped n where she lost friends#so shes already in a bad state#and then she winds up in drakon and zev and morri cant get 2 her before she can get tortured#its v frightening and horrible for her!! rly bad!!!!#she kinda dead-eyed and exhausted and empty for a while after#and poor zevran is just horrified because a.) shes gone thru smth like what he did#and b.) alia is So expressive so seeing her like this is just so. awful.#anyway. life is awesome for tabris
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Honestly I see Jimmy's refusal to put Curly out of his misery less about his weird feelings of envy or his delusions but the fact Curly is all but stated to be a shield to Jimmy from his actions and people seeing the worst in him.
The only characters that Jimmy really interacts with one on one before the crash are Curly and Anya, two individuals he has wildly different relationships with. It's likely that Curly really did most of the talking between them as the pilots and the rest of the crew as staff. They didn't know of Jimmy's more reprehensible behaviors cause they never really had the chance to and Jimmy is subconsciously aware. If they had disliked him more than Anya would have told Swansea earlier or even Daisuke when things got really bad.
It's why he takes the immediate opportunity to blame Curly; He's the shield. He's saved Jimmy's ass more times than he can count and more times than Jimmy would ever admit. Even when he can't really do it anymore, he mentally shields himself from his own faults by putting Curly between them. Letting Curly die puts too much on him because he doesn't know how to function without a safety net.
In the end Curly only lives because Jimmy needs the idea that Curly will inevitably make things better to stay alive, meaning Curly has to live, no matter how much it pains him to do so.
#in short Jimmy doesnt only care about Curly#he only cares about the securtiy that Curly provides him#and i headcanon that the reason he tried to kill everyone is because he knew it was only a matter of time befor Curly realized this wasnt#somethgin benign Jimmy did that he could smooth over but somethign that Curly would repremand and condem him for and take his security away#like yes Curly did not react fast enough or strongly enough to what Anya told him but you could see him showing more concern over it as I d#understand the psychology behind people and more specifically men like Curly as he is hearing something horrible his friend did to someone#he cares about but has less of a bond with. he feels the need to protect his crew as people first and sadly Jimmy is still the person he wa#closest too yet I still think everything happened too fast for Curly to process as would you not grapple with the fact your closest friend#is a monster you must personally deal with? or that he did something so vile to someone else you have become protective over? Would you not#think of the relative power that friend holds and how if you approuch this wrong it could end badly for everyone? He had all these thoughts#but not enough time to think about them. Also how Jimmy was one of the main people in his personal life he felt a need to protect seeing as#he got him this job. Like imagine the one person you are really trying to make good is still bad after everythign and now you have to be th#hand of judgment youve shielded them from for so long like I do not think Curly handeled the initial situation with Anya correctly I dont#think it was the case of him not believing but not really knowing what to do and feel about it as a friend of both parties the captain and#guy going through his own shit and it says so much that he was dealing with all that so well compared to Jimmy who got everyone killed cuz#he thought being captain would be like sitting on the thrown and not emotionally mentally and physically taxing like I cant say Curly is th#best person due to his inaction but he is a good person doing the best with the knowledge and shitty resources he has cuz like also Id just#be terrified that my suicidal and nilihst bestie who clearly has an inferiority complex around me is the copilot who has access to the most#to the most important parts of the ship and the means to kill us all if he feels like him or his security are being threatened like#Anya and Curly just deserved better because they get put through the ringer like just put him in a class to teach him to be less trusting#anya mouthwashing#curly mouthwashing#captain curly#mouthwashing#mouthwashing game#mouthwashing curly#mouthwashing anya#mouthwashing jimmy#jimmy mouthwashing#mouthwashing spoilers
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okay so. don’t crucify me. but su she and jin guangyao do actually make some pretty compelling points.
#critical class analysis of mdzs when???? when will i write it when????#but like.#like#fuck okay i love how it ends#because i love a happy ending#but i just keep thinking about how su she and ESP jin guangyao are right that… they kinda… had to do what they did#like su she has a few more blunders and he’s clearly jealous/resentful but… he’s not necessarily wrong about being looked down on in the la#for reasons he can’t really control#and jgy… where to even begin like okay he shouldn’t have done all those horrible things#but they ALL did horrible things#the difference is that jgy did not have anyone backing him if he fucked up if he wanted to live in dignity#he had to make sure his spot was secure#lxc lwj and whoever else was in the guanyin temple can judge him all they want#but except for wwx they’re all clan leaders or uncontested heirs#they have a level of wealth & security that allows them to make judgements on the actions of others#knowing that they can act basically free from lasting consequence#the only person who isn’t immune is wei wuxian but even then… he had the jiang clan in the past#which. it’s complicated. i know it’s complicated.#but he did attain a lot of privilege thru his connection with them and they did protect him as much as they reasonably could have#in the circumstances they were given#for the most part#and then in the future he has lan wangji who will literally kill anyone that comes at him#makes sure he’s warm and fed and kept entertained and away from pesky things like#responsibilities#and difficult conversations#so even tho he once knew a life like jgy’s he’s so far removed from it now#and just#sorry there’s a reason why all of this is in the tags#it’s not super clear in my head yet#but this is the start i promise i will come back to it
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I caved and made them real. Obverse me losing more and more motivation to draw as I made each of these back to back lol
#keese draws#oc art#oc#pmd#pokemon#pokemon mystery dungeon#pmd oc#these guys are inspired by my usual pokerogue team#oh also imagine a question mark after every he/him I have the trans woman beam pointed at all of them#these are just initial concepts for the actual characters themselves now that I’ve developed the world a lil bit#but yeah these 4 were childhood friends who wanted to be in an exploration team together but had to split up for years#tart and quart both had to move away and cart ended up leaving his hometown to try and become a real adventure a few months later#cart and bart remained in contact for a few years before cart got caught up in some crime circles#he was incredibly trusting when he was younger so he got taken advantage of and ended up digging himself a deeper hole in an attempt to be#manipulative back and eventually he got scared enough that he tried to reach out to a guild and acted as a spy for them in turn for them#eventually helping to clear his name and allowing him membership#there were parts of the deal that were unfair and kind of shady but he was desperate enough to pretend he didn’t notice#after he joined he started immediately putting out listings for new team members and he fully planned on being super picky#but when two of his childhood friends applied he was over the moon about it#and immediately accepted both of them#now quart also applied because he had recently ran away from his old life and was desperate to have a new one#and he missed his old friends deeply so when he saw one of them actually managed to start building the team they all wanted to make he was#quick to apply even if he was rusty as hell on normal non contest combat#cart didn’t recognize him at first and mostly only let him have a trial run because he thought it was funny that an eevee of all things was#applying for a high level exploration team and he fully planned on telling quart off immediately afterwards#this ofc made quart very upset and angry but he didn’t try to clairify who he was because he just assumed that time had made cart into an#asshole which isn’t wrong per say but quart didn’t realize cart didn’t recognize him#it was a rough trial expedition but cart found himself actually quite impressed with quart’s slight of paw skills and his impressive biting#speed so he decided to give quart a real chance instead of a mocking one#eventually quart laughs for the first time around him and that makes cart realize who he is and that makes him feel horrible
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