#and the guy who has it took out the back seats and turned it into a mini truck bed which honestly… kinda fucks i can’t lie
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Jonathan was walking ahead of Nancy and Steve, trying to make their way back to Steve’s car in the heavy fog. Steve couldn't help but smile as he watched Jonathan walk. He had such a specific walk that Steve now knew he found cute. His eyes landed on his backside. Yeah, that was also very cute. Steve was quickly taking it all in stride now that he knew that it wasn't just Nancy he was mad for. He felt curious eyes on him, and he looked at Nancy, who was smiling at him in amusement.
"What?" Steve asked.
"Nothing," Nancy smiled.
"No, it's something," Steve said.
"It just looked like you were checking out my boyfriend's ass," Nancy said.
"Maybe I was. It's cute," Steve shrugged. "Never noticed how cute it was before."
"It is cute," Nancy agreed.
Jonathan spun around so fast that he would have fallen if Steve hadn't caught him. Steve grinned.
"Hey, looks like you've fallen for me," Steve said.
"Get off," Jonathan scoffed, but Steve noticed he was smiling. "I would never."
"You'd be lucky, I'm an excellent cook, so whenever you don't want to cook, I'm your man," Steve winked. "Can't say the same about Nancy."
"Oh, God, she tried to cook for you, too?" Jonathan asked.
"I'm not that bad," Nancy laughed.
"Yes, you are," Jonathan and Steve said before grinning at each other.
"It's the thought that counts, Nance," Steve said.
"I have to agree with Steve on this one," Jonathan said. "You can't be good at everything."
"I can try," Nancy said.
"I also happen to give a mean foot rub," Steve said.
"I can attest to that," Nancy said.
"Are you trying to convince me that it's a great idea to fall for you or remind Nancy why she fell for you?" Jonathan asked with a scowl.
"Who says it can't be both?" Steve asked.
"What?" Jonathan asked in surprise.
"Hey, I found my car! Come on, It'd be a terrible idea to drive in this, but we can wait it out inside my car," Steve said.
Jonathan and Nancy slid into the backseat after putting the bags in the trunk while Steve took the driver's seat. Jonathan leaned forward.
"Both of us?" Jonathan asked.
Steve turned sideways in his seat to look at Jonathan.
"I assume that Nancy told you about my little dream with the RV," Steve said.
"Yeah, she did," Jonathan said.
"Well, a few weeks ago, I had another little dream. It's pretty much the same thing with Nancy there, and we're all loaded in the RV ready to go on an adventure, but there was another added detail that I just didn't want to admit has always been there. It's just as important as Nancy being there. . .you were there, too, Jonathan," Steve said.
"Me?" Jonathan asked.
"Yeah, I think you were there for a long time. When Nancy and I were together, I wanted you there, too. I thought it was just me doing it for Nancy, you know, that I wanted you to be my friend so badly that I even tried to invite you to go on dates with us," Steve said.
"I thought you were just messing with me," Jonathan said.
"Yeah, I thought I was, too," Steve said and paused. "I just don't think that I'm ever that lucky to have both Jonathan Byers and Nancy Wheeler fall for me. . .just do me a favor and at least give it some thought before you reject me."
"Uh. . .yeah," Jonathan said softly, sitting back.
There was a long stretch of silence, and then Steve could hear Nancy whispering to Jonathan in the back.
"Well, this is awkward," Steve said as he tapped his fingers on the wheel. "Maybe I should have waited for the fog to lift to say anything."
Jonathan moved forward again.
"So, when Nancy gave you a back rub, did it also always turn into sex?" Jonathan asked.
"Yes! Sometimes a guy just wants a back rub, you know!" Steve exclaimed.
"Excuse me!" Nancy yelled, laughing.
"I know," Jonathan laughed. "What's wrong, Nance? I thought you wanted us to get along."
"Not at my expense, Jonathan!" Nancy said and hit him playfully.
"I just wanted to make it less awkward," he said and Steve laughed.
"Well, it's awkward for me now!" She said.
Jonathan, Nancy, and Steve fell into an easy, playful conversation. Jonathan and Steve continued to team up against Nancy to tease her while she pretended like she wasn't loving it. Eventually, the fog lifted and managed to drive them back to the radio station. They walked into the station with grocery bags in hand and set them on the table by the couch. Joyce and the others spilled into the room.
"Oh, we got back before you did," Joyce said and hugged Jonathan.
"Yeah, your mom was about to send out a search party," Hopper said.
"Oh, we got caught in the fog," Jonathan said.
"That's what I told her," Hopper said. "She kept coming up with awful scenarios."
"Where's Robin?" Steve asked Dustin.
"Bathroom," Dustin said. "How awkward was it - Steve?"
He ignored Dustin, clapping him on his shoulder, and went down the back hallway. He could feel Nancy and Jonathan's eyes on him as he disappeared into the back. Steve followed the hallway all the way to the end and knocked on the bathroom with the special knock he had with Robin.
"Entrevue!" Robin said, and then there was a giggle.
"Doesn't that mean interview?" He heard Vickie ask.
"It does, but it sounds like enter," Robin said.
Steve rolled his eyes affectionately and entered the bathroom. Vickie was sitting on the counter with Robin in between her legs as she braided Robin's hair. Judging by their very pink mouths, they had just been making out. Steve winced.
"I can come back," Steve said.
"We stopped right before you knocked," Robin said. "I know that look, you need to spill your guts. What happened with you, Jonathan, and Nancy? I knew it was going to be awkward. I should have fought harder to go with you. Vickie, my love, you're a beautiful distraction but a distraction none the less."
"You're blaming this on me?" Vickie asked with a giggle.
"Yes, absolutely," Robin said. "It's nice to have someone to blame things on. Let me have it."
"Well," Steve said, closing the door behind him and leaning against the wall. "I told Jonathan that I was just as in love with him as I am with Nancy."
"What?! Why the hell would you do that?! To make it even more uncomfortable than it already is?!" Robin asked, with a shriek.
"I wanted to be honest with him," he explained to her.
"Honest?! Honest with him?! Are you telling me that you're in love with Jonathan Byers?" Robin asked.
"Oh, I see what this is. Are you getting me back for the Tammy Thompson thing?" he asked.
"Tammy Thompson?" Vickie asked, and Robin waved her hand at her dismissively.
"No, this is me asking if you, Steve Harrington, are in love with a man?" she asked.
"Why are you so surprised?" Steve asked. "I told you about my feelings for Jonathan after I had that dream."
"What dream?!" she shrieked.
"Robin, babe, blood pressure," Vickie said and kissed her throat.
"She cares about my health," Robin said as she took a break from her freak out. "She wants to keep me alive."
"Why are you acting so surprised about the dream I had about Jonathan being in the RV with me and Nancy?" Steve asked and then frowned. "I think I might have dreamed about telling you."
Robin ran a hand through her hair, messing up the braids Vickie put in. She took a deep breath as Vickie rubbed her shoulders.
"Alright, so you love Jonathan and Nancy?" Robin asked. "Okay, your poor taste in men aside. . .what did they say?"
"Well, they seemed surprised, but they didn't seem to hate me for the revelation. I just asked them to give it some thought before making any final decisions. So, I have no clue what they think about me wanting to be with both of them," Steve said, looking down at his feet.
"Hey, this could turn out to be a really good thing, you know," Robin said, softly.
"I'm trying not to get my hopes up," Steve replied with a shrug. "But there was this moment, in the car, when we were waiting for the fog to go away, and it was just the three of us. . . It was just really nice and they were both laughing because of me. . .so, even if nothing romantic comes from me being honest with them, I think something good already did. Jonathan certainly doesn't look at me the way he used to, which is good. . ."
"That's a really great way to look at it," Vickie said, beaming. "And welcome to the club."
"Is it a nice club?" Steve asked.
"Oh, yeah, we like to meet twice a month," Vickie said. "And we like to bake. At least, I do!"
"Me, too," Steve grinned.
Vickie hopped off the counter and hugged Steve. Robin let them have their moment before squealing and joining in on the hug. They jumped at the loud banging on the door.
"I don't know what the hell is going on in there, but I've got to piss!" Dustin yelled. "Hello?!"
After that, Steve waited patiently for a response from Jonathan and Nancy. It was too important to rush, he knew, and they both deserved to give it the proper consideration. Meanwhile, they talked, and they didn't stop him from flirting with them. He even thought that they might have been flirting back. It made him absolutely giggle when they both smiled at him at the same time, Nancy's blue eyes twinkling and Jonathan flashing his dimples, dimples that he just wanted to press his thumb into. . . Yeah, okay, he was definitely a freak. Would Jonathan let him do that?
"Jonathan!" Steve yelled.
The three of them had gotten partnered a lot more frequently. Steve wasn't sure if it was random circumstances or if someone was trying to throw them together on purpose. Steve wasn't complaining, especially when they were all three looking after Dustin, who was now possibly starting to pick up on the way Steve looked at the both of them. That's why they were here now, running away from a demogorgon. It always seems like the three of them were running away from those creatures. The woods offered little to no protection, but the demogorgon had cut them off from Steve's car. Now, the thing had separated Jonathan from Steve and Nancy. Steve and Nancy scrambled around the dark for their weapons, but they couldn't wait because the demogorgon had Jonathan trapped underneath him. Steve stood up and ran at the demogorgon, throwing his entire body on top of it, knocking it off Jonathan.
"Steve!" Jonathan yelled.
Steve used everything he had to pin the demogorgon to the ground, but the monster was stronger than he was. Its claws dug into Steve's forearm, and the other one dug into his side. Scraping was the more accurate term. It was still pretty painful. He heard the click of the lighter that Nancy had managed to find, and out of the corner of his eye, he saw a blaze of fire. As the demogorgon flipped him on his back and opened his face, Nancy jammed the flaming bat into its mouth. The demogorgon screamed, jumping off of Steve, and tried to pull the bat out, but its nails had sunk into its flesh very deep. It ran off, running into the trees as it tried to pull it out.
"Steve!" Nancy and Jonathan screamed.
"Our bat!" Steve yelled.
"I'll make us a new one," Jonathan asked as he wrapped an arm around him, pulling him up.
"What else can you do with your hands?" Steve mumbled.
"Let's get you to the station, and you'll find out," Nancy said and wrapped her arm around his other side.
"Why is it always me?" Steve asked and snorted. "I'm lucky, I guess."
Jonathan and Nancy got Steve into the backseat of his car. They quickly put temporary bandages on his wounds before digging into his pants' pockets to fish out his keys. Just as Nancy slipped in the driver's seat while Jonathan held onto Steve, they heard the sound of the soldiers off in the distance, taking out the demogorgon. Nancy quickly drove off towards the radio station. When they got there, no one else had arrived yet. Steve guessed they were still at the hospital. With their help, Steve pulled off his backpack, jacket, and shirt. They yanked him down onto the couch, grabbing the first aid kit.
"Jesus," Jonathan said.
"Oh, this isn't that bad. You should have seen the bat bites and road rashes during spring break. I don't think I'm going to need stitches," Steve said. "Just stop the bleeding and clean the wound, then wrap it."
"Are you sure?" Nancy asked.
"Uh, yeah," Steve said and then he frowned. "Did Robin and I not tell you that we're studying to become paramedics?"
"No," Nancy and Jonathan said.
"Uh, yeah, I figured that since I was getting hurt a lot and we both wanted to find a way to help people," he said. "I'm not even sure that I'm going to get it."
"You're going to do great, man," Jonathan said.
Nancy wrapped Steve's torn shirt around his arm while Jonathan pressed a piece of cloth to his side.
"I can't believe you tackled a demogorgon," Nancy said.
"It was nothing," Steve said.
"Are you seriously being modest about full body tackling a nine foot tall demogorgon? It was impressive, and you know it, asshole," Jonathan said. "I couldn't believe you did that either."
"Couldn't let you die," Steve said.
Jonathan blushed and focused on fixing up his wounds.
"Thank you," Jonathan whispered.
Steve used his free hand to brush Jonathan's hair out of his eyes. He watched as Jonathan's expressions changed as they finished wrapping him up. He looked angry.
"Are you okay?" Steve asked.
Jonathan jumped up and began to pace. Finally, he turned on Steve, his hands on his hips.
"That was completely stupid of you to do that! It was a fucking demogorgon and you went after it like you were playing football! Did you even think about Robin or Dustin or the other kids? You know they care about you?!" Jonathan yelled.
"Like mother, like son, right?" Steve asked Nancy and she snorted.
"Tell me about it," she said.
"Hey! I'm being serious here!" Jonathan yelled.
"I'm getting hints of Hopper now," Steve said.
"Like father, like son," Nancy teased.
"You threw yourself at a demogorgon like it meant nothing. . .like your life meant nothing, and you always do this! I mean, I thought you wanted a future!" Jonathan yelled.
"I do! That's what we're fighting for here," Steve said, bewildered.
"Then act like it! You want the RV, don't you?!" He asked.
"Yeah!"
"I want the RV, too! We want the RV, but we can't have the RV if you're dead!" Jonathan exclaimed.
"What?" Steve asked, looking at him softly.
"I want the RV!" Jonathan yelled, throwing up his hands. "Okay, I want the RV."
Steve and Jonathan stared at each other, Jonathan breathing heavily. Jonathan threw himself onto Steve, pressing him back against the couch. He cupped Steve’s face and crashed his lips to his. Steve responded to the kiss eagerly, running his hands up Jonathan's back and smiling when he felt Nancy's hand join his in tracing a path down Jonathan's spine. Steve broke the kiss, smiling.
"I just want to point out that we can't have the RV without you either," Steve said. "And we're all equally reckless, so I don't know why I'm the one getting yelled at. . ."
"Asshole," Jonathan laughed.
Nancy grabbed Steve’s chin and forced him to look at her.
"You do not have our permission to die, got it?" Nancy asked.
"Got it," Steve laughed.
Nancy kissed him, just as enthusiastically as Jonathan. God. He missed kissing her, and it seemed like she did, too. Their kiss didn't last long before they heard the front door to the radio station bang open loudly. The three of them sprang apart really quickly. The rest of their party all filtered in at once.
"Oh my god! Is that blood?!" Joyce yelled.
"It's not mine, it's Steve’s!" Jonathan said quickly.
"Steve! Why does this keep happening to you?!" Dustin exclaimed.
"He does this to himself," Jonathan said, smiling. "He wouldn't have to do it if it I hadn't needed saving."
"He's fine for someone who full body tackled a nine foot tall demogorgon," Nancy said.
"You tackled a demogorgon?!" Lucas, Mike, and Dustin yelled.
"Yeah, I did do that," Steve said.
"You dingus," Robin said.
"Totally worth it, though," Steve said. "And Jonathan already yelled at me for being reckless."
"Yeah, I thought I heard him yelling," Will grinned.
"Just like his mom," Hopper said. "What was that about an RV?"
"You heard that?" Steve asked.
"It's the only thing we heard. Why does Jonathan want an RV?" Will asked.
"Oh my god! He said he wants the RV?" Robin asked, and then he turned to Jonathan. "You said you wanted the RV?!"
"Yeah, I'm guessing you know what that means?" Jonathan asked with a laugh.
"Yeah, I know what that means!" Robin squealed, jumping up and down. "Vick, he he said he wanted the RV!"
"I heard!" Vickie squealed and started jumping with her girlfriend.
"We both want the RV," Nancy said in amusement.
"They both want the RV!" Robin and Vickie squealed.
"What the hell is this?" Hopper asked.
"Jonathan?" Joyce asked in amusement.
"Oh! I think I know what this is about," Dustin said.
"You do?" Steve asked. "Was I that obvious?"
"Jonathan was so jealous that we stole an RV that he wants to steal one himself," Dustin said, snapping his fingers.
"Jonathan, honey, why do you want to steal an RV?" Joyce asked.
"Yeah, I don't think that's what this is," Hopper said, squinting his eyes at Jonathan. "Son, something you want to tell us?"
"It's nothing bad. We'll tell you later," Jonathan said, blushing. "Let's just get Steve something to eat."
"Yeah, me and Vickie went shopping this time, so you're in luck, Stevie," Robin said.
"Okay, but while we eat, can we please cover up Steve’s tits? No one wants to see that!" Mike exclaimed.
Steve and Jonathan shared a smile with Nancy as Jonathan collapsed on the couch next to Steve. They curled up together as they ate, enjoying the moment of happiness during all this hell. Steve glanced at Jonathan, who was leaning against his arm as he told everyone about how Steve saved him. Oh, how far they've come.
#stranger things#steve harrington#nancy wheeler#jonathan byers#steve harrington x jonathan byers#stonathan#nancy wheeler x steve harrington#stancy#nancy wheeler x jonathan byers#jancy#nancy wheeler x steve harrington x jonathan byers#stoncy#monster hunting trio#bisexual steve harrington#bisexual jonathan byers#pansexual nancy wheeler#stranger things fanfiction#rueleigh writes#rueleigh's thoughts
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PROTECTIVE ADAM DRABBLE
haha hi guys... so huge shout out to @quinngefail for trusting me enough to write out a bit for this idea they had! really not my best writing but its okay, i still had fun writing it <3 heavy tw! slight fatshaming and disability shame!! dont be like these guys
adam was never the protective type. he knew lawrence could hold himself up and he knew he could protect himself. he had no reason to be mean to others. of course, there were times where he would tell someone to fuck off. he hated it when people would stare at lawrence. not only was staring rude (funny from a voyeur huh?), but lawrence was his. the older man belonged to adam and he had a ring on his finger to prove it.
the two of them knew their limits with each other but others didn't. which, in adams opinion, it should be common fucking sense. who the fuck would comment on a guy's weight? thats like…asking if a woman is pregnant. well. he actually doesnt know if that translates right but…you get the point, don't you?
like that one time when they were at a restaurant. they were sitting across from each other, lawrence had ordered a nice glass of wine and adam had a dr pepper. really, they needed the rest. hard week for them both. they had been patiently waiting for their food and once it finally was in front of them, these fucking kids were seated across from their table.
both of them paid no mind. it didnt matter. truly, looking back at it, they shouldve left them alone. but in adams defense, they were looking at larry wrong. his larry.
"you really think hes gonna eat all that?" "course he is. look at him!"
adam had heard the whispers, he noticed the stares. he inhaled slowly, trying to keep his cool. he wouldnt ruin their date. not over this. taking a quick peek up at his stunning date, he took note of how unbothered lawrence seemed. maybe it bothered him more than it did the blond. or maybe not. he didnt even know of larry had heard those fuckers talking. he knew the man's hearing was getting just a little worse. he didnt mind. it worked. adam was loud anyway.
he let his hand move over toward lawrence's, locking their fingers together and watching him take a few bites of his meal. it wasnt a ton of food. he didn't get the issue. steak, a salad he had already finished, and a bowl of soup. of course, he also ordered fries that were mostly just something adam could steal off his plate, and they had shared mozzarella sticks and chips for an appetizer. but that wasnt too much. that was a good amount of food. they had no reason to make fun of him but adam had every reason to knock their fucking teeth in.
larry's gaze caught adams, a soft smile pairing with those beautiful blue eyes. he didn't seem bothered. not one bit.
"could you uh..go get me a drink, lar?" he asked, nodding over to the bar near the back of the restaurant. he wanted to have a small word with the very kind people next to him.
"oh, of course." lawrence lifted his hand, pressing a loving kiss to his knuckles. he always treated adam like a princess. would that make lawrence the princess' bride? haha. adam's never seen the princess bride and neither has the author. sorry.
the blonde took his cane in his hand, huffing out a tired breath as he stood up. "easy on your leg.." adam warned, watching him carefully and staying on high guard to make sure he didnt need to step up and assist his lover. he was fine. he could handle himself, adam. calm down. he heard the people across from them snicker. their eyes followed lawrence as he left for the bar and adam couldnt have been more pissed.
adam turned in his seat, eyes wide with the insane urge to set the building ablaze and a smile so sarcastically pissed off that he felt he could be the next big actor. he spread his legs just a little, letting his elbows rest on his knees. he clasped his hands together, staring directly at the table. "hey there!" he greeted, the gears in his head running on just enough cigarette smoke to keep the 'protect lawrence' and his 'destroy everything and everyone in your way' gears in overdrive and the 'think rationally' and 'work this out' gears held at a complete stop.
the table focused their attention onto adam, one of the members cocking an eyebrow and mimicking his positioning. of course, adam wasnt expecting them to take him seriously. how could they? he wasnt anything special. he was just an average looking loser with a boyfriend who owns a fucking bmw.
"hey there back!"
adam hated that fucking smile. little fucking demons is what they were. he lifted his head to check on lawrence. he was still at the bar, chatting with the bartender and waiting ever so patiently for adams drink. he wasnt even sure what he was getting and truly he didnt care. he had bigger problems to handle at the moment. "is there a fuckin' problem here?" he tilted his head.
the person mocking him shrugged. "im not sure what youre talking about."
the shorter had to resist the urge to stand and slam his hands on the table. of course they didnt know. why would they know what they just fucking did? that makes so much sense that adam almost forgot why he was about to break their fucking teeth in! almost.
"yknow, youre not exactly quiet when it comes to shit talking people. though, i suppose you would really like it for someone to do the same to you, yeah?" he motions to the outfit of another member. "like how your shirt has a cute little logo for nirvana on it but i bet you cant name three songs by the damn band, huh?"
before they could defend themselves, adam continued. "or how you," he pointed to another member, "have that beautiful necklace on! oh my it looks so expensive! but yknow i saw the same thing at claires! and, really i would say your outfit makes up for it but green just is not your color. i would maybe go for a dumpster fire red next time! which i dunno, i think a nice bitch blue would go great for all of you!"
one of the members stood up, which caused adams confidence to falter just slightly. he straightened himself up, his brain suddenly racking through old memory files to find the fight tips that scott had given him. just in case.
"who the fuck do you think you are, dude?" they shouted. other tables turned to look at the pair. adam wasnt sure what to do, so he did what he did best. he imagined it was scott. truly, he did this for every fight. it was a lot easier yelling at that fucknut than some stranger.
adam vaguely pointed to the bar, "oh, so its okay for you to insult my fiance but i cant insult you? i mean, cmon, i just told you that you all had trash outfits! you fucks were making fun of his body! not so fuckin' fun when its you is it?"
he wouldve keep going. he shouldve kept going. if it wasnt for lawrence wobbling his way back with a beer bottle in hand, adam probably wouldve gotten physical. larry carefully slid his way back into the booth, setting the drink down. the doctor took note of how riled up adam and the other table seemed to be. now that the member of the group had sat and adam had his drink, they could continue their date.
"i heard you shouting." lawrence whispered in that all too calm voice of his. "you dont have to defend me, adam. people are going to make fun of me, i know it. but i can handle it. im an adult too."
adam scoffed as he took a sip of his beer, "i fuckin hate people, larry."
"i know you do, sweetheart."
the date ended soon after, a quick kiss and a hefty bill that adam was shocked lawrence was able to pay for in full cash concluding their time spent at the restaurant. adam gave the table a very nice fuck you flip off as they left, taking larry's - his larry's - hand in his own and leading them out to that fancy ass bmw.
______
how 2 write ending?
#hey hey hey hey! hey stoopid! ➸ annon writes#game over! ➸ saw writes#keeping our eyes close to whats going on on the screen ➸ angst writes#call me on the line call me anytime ➸ fluff writes#saw#adam faulkner stanheight#lawrence gordon#chainshipping
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i would give the absolute Sloppiest toppy to anyone who could bring back the geo tracker or get me one in good condition i would kill for one that was under 50k miles and didn’t need a ton of work done
#there’s one near me for $1000 but it has a blown head gasket that i’d need to replace#and the guy who has it took out the back seats and turned it into a mini truck bed which honestly… kinda fucks i can’t lie#but also it has over 200k miles on it :((((((#personal
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i know your name ✭
{gojo satoru x f!reader}
summary: gojo satoru was practically everyone’s god as his shiny charming reputation has followed him ever since high school and through college— his band he had with his best friend suguru packing the local college pub every night just to see him sing and play the bass. unbeknownst to you, satoru has been keeping an eye on you, and when you officially meet him right before one of his shows, satoru just about falls to his knees over you.
warnings: MDNI. college au, CAR SMUT be patient!!, fingering, squirting, a bit of oral hehe, cursing, angst, FLUFFF, FILTHY DIRTY TALK, a sprinkle of degradation, tinyyy mentions of alcohol and drinking, gojo is obsessed with reader, afab!reader, jealousy.
word count: 8.8k
authors note: oh my goodness this one took me a FAT MINUTE but it’s SO SO CUTE and i hope you all think so too!! thank you thank you for all of your notes on my works!! MWAHH.
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“please come with me to the alley, i don’t think i can handle one moron and an even bigger moron by myself.”
shoko shimmied her jacket onto her shoulders, a disgruntled and pleading look on her face as she turned to face you. “they’re only playing a few songs, and you don’t have to drink!”
you laughed softly. “who’s they?”
“suguru and satoru, they’re playing at the alley.”
“gojo satoru?”
the cogs in your brain spun as you gnawed at the inside of your cheek, a bit apprehensive. the alley was the place everyone went to at your college to get drunk and laid, and it also happened to be the place where the two boys played their band almost every night— satoru mainly having connections with the owner of the bar to even allow a bunch of college kids to trash the place to begin with.
you didn’t necessarily know satoru, but in your years of observing him back in high school, you knew he was viewed by anyone and everyone as a god, his reputation shiny and impressive as he had the greatest charisma and charm you had ever seen.
you remember back to when basically every other day he was getting confessed to in the halls or in class— or after school… or literally anywhere now that you thought about it.
but satoru has never been prideful or rude, even though it was something that was supposed to be written for him being the most popular guy— but he just simply didn’t follow it.
satoru was kind. really kind. and even though he got millions of confessions per year, he treated each rejection with gentleness and respect, never turning a cold eye to anyone as he apologized profusely and tried to help them feel better.
he always volunteered to do your class banners and plan your school’s activities, festivals, and field trips so nobody else had the burden of missing out on the fun. he always helped out the gardener after school and watered the plants with them (soon after practically taking over the entire shift for free and telling them to relax on a bench), tutored his friends and peers when they asked him for help, and made anyone that felt left out feel included.
that’s why he was so popular. gojo satoru was a ray of sunshine with bright blue eyes and white ruffly hair, with a gorgeous face that you never saw without a smile— loud and obnoxious and a little clumsy, but kind.
“i still don’t know why they started a band.. but they get pretty big tips every night so i guess that’s why,” shoko muttered, sipping the last of her iced tea as she got up from her seat— the cafe you were both sitting in quiet and warm as you copied her actions and stood. “or could be because satoru likes the attention.”
you weren’t close with suguru or satoru like shoko was, and you’ve never even properly met them either, but you always listened to her whenever she’d complain and understood her completely nonetheless.
you laughed at her last comment and smiled. “i’ll go… but i can only stay for two songs! i have class at seven am tomorrow.”
she smiled wide and threw her arms around you, “thank you thank you thank you!”
you’ve never actually been to the alley before, only having heard about it through the grapevine and from your other classmates that went, parties and concerts and drinking never really on the schedule for you. you honestly loved parties and concerts, and you loved the idea of hanging out with people and doing whatever your hearts desired until the sun came up.
but ever since you started college, your high school group kind of disappeared, and now you only really have one true best friend that you preferred over anything else, that being shoko. your nights are usually always calm and filled with studying or self care, your little life quiet and independent as you navigated through the days on your own.
and although you were a bit lonely at times, yearning for another soul to share your nights with, you learned to enjoy your own company.
the alley was a couple of blocks down from the cafe you and shoko were originally at, your ears already picking up on the vibrations of guitars and drums from outside as she approached the bouncer at the front, not even being able to get a word in before the big man was already telling her no.
“no?!” shoko dug into her purse and pulled out her phone. “i was literally here last week, i’m friends with the band that’s playing.”
“sorry we’re at max capacity—”
“it’s okay, they both can come in. they’re on stage with us.”
your eyes snapped to the door and you recognized geto suguru, his long jet black hair cascading down to his shoulders as he sported an all black outfit— politely smiling at the bouncer.
the man moved to the side and ushered us in, shoko’s shoulders dropping in relief as you both walked in and over to a table by the stage. “thank you suguru.”
he nodded. “if i don’t, satoru will throw another fit again and say you don’t love him if you don’t show up.”
shoko rolled her eyes and looked at you, her lips pressed into a thin line. “you see what i mean?”
“shoko!” a loud, booming and enthusiastic voice rang through the pub as you turned, spotting none other than satoru with his long arms open, more or less throwing himself on her. “you came!”
“you threatened me—”
“i did no such thing!” he sprung back. “are you not here out of the goodness of your heart? to support your two best boys living their dreams?”
“no.”
“shokooo!” he whined and you giggled, which caused him to snap his head in your direction, finally noticing your presence.
her.
“oh! hello,” he smiled kindly to you and extended his hand. “i’m satoru, and you are?”
“y/n!” you grinned sweetly and politely to him, taking his cold hand in yours and shaking it.
“are you a friend of shoko’s?”
you nodded.
he cocked his head to the side, “how come i’ve never seen you around?”
“oh i don’t go out too often, that’s probably why,” you laughed lightly, a little embarrassed by your answer.
he beamed anyways, his smile so big and brilliant that you were starting to see for yourself exactly why everyone loved him so much, not that you didn’t already know the reason behind it in the first place.
“me neither!”
satoru was still holding your hand.
“yes you do!” shoko scoffed. “you’re barely ever at your apartment and i always have to be your designated driver—”
he gawked, glaring at her. “that’s not true! i was home yesterday!”
“because you were hungover.” suguru mumbled.
you laughed again, and satoru turned back to face you, a grin on his face.
just then, a rather large group of guys started making their way towards your area, all beckoning and calling for satoru while holding up several shot glasses, his head snapping towards their direction and flashing a dazzling smile.
“satoru come!”
“satoru take some with us!”
he gently let go of your hand and raised his, waving high as he readjusted his black round sunglasses up the bridge of his nose, “give me a second! i’ll be over!”
satoru turned back to you, resuming the conversation.
“sorry, she lies. she likes to lie. i’m glad i didn’t go to high school with her.”
“yes we did— i’m going over to your followers and stealing a shot, goodbye.” shoko grumbled, throwing her purse on the table and walking away, dragging suguru along with her.
“we actually um..” you shifted your weight from one foot to the other. “we went to high school together.”
“oh i know.”
your eyebrows pinched together.
he knows?
“you used to water the garden on days i couldn’t afterschool, right?”
your eyes widened a little.
“oh! and you used to fix the class banners whenever i didn’t notice my fuck up, which was always.” he patted the top of your head and laughed, “thank you for that by the way.”
“you knew?” you murmured, a rosy tint to your cheeks.
“duh,” his eyes softened. “i’m sorry i never thanked you properly then.”
you shook your head dumbly, a little spaced out as you took in what he said. “no it’s okay.”
your eyes then fell to the instruments and band set up behind him, suddenly remembering that he was performing tonight.
“so what do you guys play?” you spoke up gently, hands wringing behind your back. “do you play original songs? or covers?”
“covers! 80’s covers.” he explained excitedly. “suguru and i switch off singing. i play the bass and he plays the guitar, and we have a couple of extra friends in the back playing the drums and keyboard.”
your eyes sparkled as you watched the stage set up process, black chords scattered everywhere on the ground in disarray as several individuals on the platform tuned their instruments or plucked out a few notes.
“80’s?” you perked up. “what kind of 80’s?”
“what kind?”
“yeah! morissey? the cure? new order—”
satoru was awestruck, mouth slightly parted. “you know who they are?”
you quickly nodded, a cute smile on your face.
“you like the cure?” he asked quietly.
“i love the cure.”
satoru practically had hearts in his eyes as he beamed down at you with a stupid face, his heart a little frazzled with a familiar feeling sparkling in his chest.
“satoru!”
he snapped out of his trance and spun around, suguru on stage beckoning him over. “sorry, we have to start.”
“okay!” he walked backwards as he quickly faced you again and smiled, a little frantic. “i’ll talk to you after we play! i’m gonna quiz you on it so pay attention!”
you laughed, your hand covering your mouth a bit as you nodded. “is it counting towards my grade? or is it extra credit?”
“extra credit if you go on a date with me after the show!”
you stopped.
“she can’t! moron,” shoko suddenly appeared beside you and threw an arm around your shoulder. “she’s only staying for two songs!”
gojo’s jaw dropped slack, his shoulders slumping as he got up on stage, arms out. “two?!”
you grimaced, an apologetic look on your face and kind of feeling like a lame grandma as you nodded, “i have class at seven am tomorrow!”
before he could even respond, satoru got pulled by tech crew to test out his microphone, and you and shoko gradually settled yourselves on the high bar stool chairs at your table.
“odd,” she muttered with a funny look on her face.
“hm? what is?” your eyes switched to hers.
“satoru’s never asked a girl out before.”
your eyes bulged open. “never?”
“never.” shoko sipped a little at her beer and gave you a comforting smile. “i’ve always seen girls try it with him and ask him out or simply just follow him around like a lost dog, but he’s never gone after anyone.”
you watched a little smirk spread across her face, and your hands grew a tiny bit sweaty as you swallowed thickly.
“if you’re interested in him, there’s a line. but i think you have a head start.”
the music started— suguru introducing himself, satoru, and the band calm and pleasantly before they began playing their first song. it was loud and rhythmic, vibrations murmuring through the floor as your glass of water shook on the table with every note.
they weren’t bad at all— they were actually pretty good, really good, and you found yourself not really wanting to admit it since it seemed like satoru was good at a million different things regardless of category or genre.
“do they have a name for their band?!” you yelled over the music, leaning your frame a little closer to her without taking your eyes off of the stage.
shoko snorted, “the strongest monkeys.”
you threw your head back and laughed loudly, looking at her incredulously. “really?!”
as he performed on stage, satoru noticed you laugh and he smiled against the microphone, a vision he connected back to high school, and for reasons he couldn’t explain, he was internally a little unsteady as your pretty eyes watched him play and sing— feeling embarrassed whenever he would trip over a chord clumsily like he seemed to do at every freaking show, but feeling better seeing as it made you giggle.
by the end of their second song, you showed shoko the time on your phone and tried to stand as discretely as possible in attempts at not disturbing anyone around you, grabbing your purse from the arm of your chair and swinging it over your shoulder.
but when you looked up, satoru was already looking at you as suguru spoke through the microphone, his eyes wide and pleading as he held up his index finger.
“one more song!” he mouthed. “please.”
you gnawed at your bottom lip anxiously, your eyes darting around the pub and back to the time on your phone before they landed again on satoru.
“stay.” he mouthed again.
and for reasons you couldn’t explain, your body pulled you back down on the stool and you sat— shoko quirking an eyebrow at you in confusion.
satoru’s face broke out into the brightest smile, a smile equivalent to the blinding rays of the sun as he pushed up his round sunglasses and gave you a cute thumbs up.
“thank you.”
and your heart stuttered.
you eventually decided to stay for the rest of the show, seeing as it was already late as fuck anyways— and they played few more songs then, a mix of well known 80’s songs as well as a few underrated ones, your head nodding gently to the beat and swaying your little shoulders. in the midst of it, satoru had been watching and glancing in your direction so many times throughout the show, that he subconsciously started mimicking your little shoulder sway on stage as he performed.
college girls screamed practically every five minutes when the boys did anything, some even going as far as running up the platform and reaching up for satoru’s hands or ankles as he played, him smiling bright at each and every one of them with shoko shaking her head in disappointment— her forehead falling to the palm of her hand as you laughed.
ironically by the end of it, the band closed with the cure, and as the crowd dispersed and several took their leave from the alley— some shouting words of praise at the boys, you and shoko stood and walked over to the stage. satoru in a heartbeat noticed you coming over and hooked his mic quickly back on the mic stand, tossing the strap of his bass over his shoulders and setting it down before hopping off stage.
“did you like it?” he panted hopefully, trying to catch his breath as his forehead glistened with sweat, his hands on his hips.
you smiled gently. “i did! good job, you both played really great songs.”
suguru gave you a small smile in gratitude from the platform as he unplugged and untangled a few chords— and satoru beamed, nodding. “i’m glad! okay, here comes your quiz!”
“oh god.”
“we played the cure at the end…” satoru dragged out.
“mhm…”
“what song?” he tilted his head to the side, and your cheeks went pink as you grinned.
“pictures of you,” you replied softly. “it’s my favorite one.”
satoru’s forehead fell to rest against your shoulder, and your eyes widened in surprise.
“i would expect nothing less from you, y/n.”
you hummed out a laugh, and his heart did a tiny somersault at the sound before he picked his head back up and looked at you softly.
“thank you for staying.”
shoko bounded over to you then and looped her arm through yours. “ready to go?”
you nodded quickly before smiling sweetly at satoru. “i’ll see you around! thank you for—”
“wait!” he shot his arms out frantically with wide eyes. “what about our date?”
you froze. “our date?”
“unless you want the quiz to count towards your grade…” he mumbled lowly, eyes darting on everything and everywhere except you with pinky cheeks.
“i didn’t think you were being serious about that..” you spoke gently.
his eyebrows furrowed. “why not?”
“because you’re gojo satoru,” shoko butt in.
you quickly flicked her forehead— your lips pressed into a thin line, earning a little laugh from satoru as you turned your head to look at him again.
“i have an early class tomorrow… ill see you around though, okay?”
without thinking, satoru reached over and placed a hand on your shoulder, gently turning you to face him.
“let me take you to class.”
shoko and suguru exchanged a look and your lips parted, eyebrows pinching together.
“what?”
“i’ll take you to class in the morning,” he looked desperate. “and i won’t count the quiz towards your grade.”
you were skeptical, very skeptical, unsure of what satoru wanted from you in this situation. you had just met him, properly at least, and though you knew he was a good person, you weren’t sure if that was still relevant in the field of picking up girls.
you looked to shoko, who shrugged, and your eyes landed back to satoru’s pleading one’s, your entire body and soul hesitating.
“i—” you gnawed at your bottom lip, a nervous habit as you took in the way he looked like a sad little puppy the longer you took to respond, your heart not having the ability to ever say no to anyone, ever. not even him.
“okay.”
his shoulders relaxed, and he let out a puff of relieved air as he gave you the biggest smile, nodding hopefully.
“okay! h—here-” he reached into the pocket of his jeans and pulled out his phone. “if i could— if i could have your number? and i’ll text you when im on my way and stuff…”
you shakily took satoru’s phone, the screen already opened up to the ‘add contact’ feature as you typed in your number before passing it back to him.
“thank you!” he beamed. “i’ll see you tomorrow then?”
he was so excited, and you really didn’t know why, but you couldn’t help but give him a sweet smile of yours in return, nodding.
“see you.”
when you finally arrived home that night, it didn’t take satoru even ten minutes after that to text you.
(unknown): i have good news for you miss y/n
you stared at your phone, your heart jumping a bit as you typed back a response.
(you): and i have bad news for you satoru
(satoru): WHAT
(satoru): ok wait me first
(satoru): congrats you passed my class!! that quiz bumped up your grade from 0% to 100% ur so smart
(satoru): but if your bad news is you rejecting me i’m FAILING you
(you): HAHAHAHA
(you): silly silly
(you): my bad news was that i always have banana milk on my way to school in the mornings and unfortunately i don’t have any extra for you :(
(you): i ran out ;(
within the two minutes that it took for you to respond with your declared bad news, satoru was absolutely shitting it, wholeheartedly believing you were going to reject him and leave him to dramatically rot away all alone.
he replied quickly, a goofy smile on his face.
(satoru): that’s literally the only reason why i asked you out :(
(you): and how do you know i have banana milk in the mornings before school?
(satoru): OH
(satoru): SO ABOUT TOMORROW
you giggled, wiping the last of your makeup off and turning off your vanity light before jumping into bed, snuggling into your covers as the cool air softly touched your face from your open window.
(you): *address*
(you): pick me up at 6:30 please, if that’s okay :)
(satoru): i’ll pick you up at six miss y/n
(you): SIX WHY
(satoru): for a breakfast date silly!! okay goodnight xoxo
you hadn’t even realized the huge stupid smile on your face until your rosy cheeks started to ache.
(you): HAHAHA
(you): goodnight <3
a heart?!
satoru stuffed his face into his pillow, feeling like little love birdies were flying around his head and pecking at his hair.
the following morning, you ran your fingers through your hair and probably fixed your outfit a million trillion times before you were satisfied, a huge lump in your throat as you gnawed so much at your bottom lip that it drew blood.
you were nervous, but why? you didn’t know why. maybe because it was gojo satoru picking you up. maybe it was the fact that you hadn’t had a guy try to hit on you in what felt like a decade, the last time really being the last day of high school when you randomly found a note in your locker, the words literally illegible.
maybe it was the fact that satoru was the most handsome man you have ever seen.
but so was he to everybody else.
(satoru): i’m outside! :]
you wiped your clammy hands on your legs and stood, hiking your school bag further up your shoulder before walking down the stairs and out the door, seeing satoru seated in his car in your driveway.
you timidly opened the door to the passenger side and stepped in.
“hi!” he greeted cheerfully and proceeded to place his hand on the back of your headrest as he backed out, looking through his rear view mirror.
“hi!” you said gently. “you’re not tired?”
“nuh uh,” he smiled at you. “i had three energy drinks before i got you.”
your head instantly whipped in his direction. “satoru— three?!”
he giggled at your reaction, the sides of his blue eyes crinkling as he patted your head. “don’t worry silly, i’ve had maybe five at a time before—”
“five?!”
you slumped against the passenger seat and closed your eyes. “satoru, you’re gonna develop heart problems if you keep this up.”
“nah,” he reached into the backseat, his eyes still on the road. “i’m the strongest.”
and you snorted then, watching him retrieve two small bottles of juice from the back without taking his eyes off of the road.
“i got us orange juice— wait do you like orange juice? oh fuck maybe—”
you giggled and waved him off, taking both bottles from his hands. “it’s okay! i do like orange juice, thank you.” you settled them on your lap neatly. “i’ll hold them while you drive.”
“aww thanks sweets,” he murmured affectionately, and your face instantly went warm to the touch.
“i also got us breakfast bagels so we can sit and people watch before your class—” his eyes snapped to yours. “if— if that’s okay.”
your heart skipped a beat at his planning, nodding as you reached into your school bag and pulled out a little yellow carton, holding it out for him as he drove.
satoru tore his gaze away from the road momentarily and looked, his eyebrows furrowing.
“your daily morning banana milk?”
you smiled softly, nudging it towards him. “for you.”
he physically melted as he looked at your sweet sweet face and back towards the road.
“you’re giving up your banana milk— for me?”
you tore off the straw from the back of the milk box, sticking it through the little opening and offering it to him again.
“yup yup.”
he bit his lower lip as he gratefully took the milk box from you, giddy and flustered on the inside as he took tiny sips.
“an absolute delicacy, thank you miss y/n.”
before you even realized it, satoru was already pulling in to the campus parking lot, shifting his gear into park and turning off the ignition before opening his door.
“don’t move!” he sputtered suddenly. “don’t touch that door hold on—”
he slammed his door shut and you watched quizzically as he ran across the front of the car and opened the door for you, flashing an award winning smile that could shatter the earth if he wanted to.
you still couldn’t piece together why he was doing so much for you or why he was interested in the first place, but as you watched him set up the breakfast bagels cutely as you both sat on the bench, him carefully handing you yours along with your orange juice, you didn’t really have the heart to ask him why.
maybe it was the more selfish side of you, the one that always longed to share little moments like this with another being, the one that always spent her days alone watching movies or doing little crafts in her room to keep the time going, a bittersweet feeling in your chest every time you saw your classmates or casual friends post about their parties or outings.
you hadn’t realized that you didn’t respond to whatever satoru had said, and you snapped out of it.
“fuck— i’m sorry satoru, i spaced out.” you laughed softly. “what were you saying?”
he stared at you, his eyes examining your face. “what’s wrong?”
“huh?”
“what were you thinking about?”
“it was— it was nothing,” you took a sip of your orange juice. “i forgot.”
satoru shoved his face close to yours, your breath hitching and your cheeks growing pink as you watched his eyes scan every part of you, his expression concerned.
“something’s bothering you,” he hummed. “am i being too forward? i’m— i’m sorry sometimes i don’t even realize—“
“no!” you shot your arms out frantically and placed them on his shoulders, “no, it’s not that, you’re okay satoru. everything you’ve done has been really nice, so thank you.”
your voice was so sweet as you spoke to him, and even though it made him feel better to some degree, he still couldn’t shake the empty and sad look he saw on your face when you were spaced out.
he slowly retreated back and hesitantly nodded as you placed your hands back on your lap, your fingers then tearing a piece from your breakfast bagel and plopping it into your mouth.
“did you ever find…” he spoke in between bites. “a note in your locker the last day of high school?”
your eyebrows furrowed, taken aback. “how do you know about that?”
he swallowed, a sheepish look on his face. “that was me. i put that note in.”
your eyes widened as your body completely froze over, putting your bagel down— the wrapper crinkling underneath as you did so.
“really?”
satoru nodded, his flushed cheeks prominent on his pale skin as he suddenly found his bagel super interesting to look at.
“what did it say?”
he looked at you baffled. “what did it say? what do you mean?”
you giggled then, your hand covering your mouth as you leaned forward a little bit. “i could— i could barely read it. the handwriting-“
“oh my fucking god!” satoru threw his arms up in despair. “that explains so much. i was so sad i straight up thought you hated me.”
you stopped. “what do you mean?”
“i wrote my name and how i thought you were really pretty, and then i wrote my number at the bottom.” he dropped his shaking head in his hands, laughing. “but i wrote it really fast because i saw you coming so i just stuffed it in there.”
he slumped over his legs on the bench, his elbows on his knees as he moaned.
“you think i’m pretty?” you asked softly.
he turned his head to the side as he was hunched over, sunglasses slipping down the bridge of his nose as he smiled gently. “very.”
gojo satoru thought you were pretty.
you smiled cutely at him, reaching out and pushing his sunglasses back up his eyes, yours warm and endearing. “silly.”
you leaned back on the bench and giggled. “to be fair satoru, even if i was able to read your note, i probably would’ve thought it was a prank.”
“a prank? why?” his shoulders deflated, an unamused look on his face. “because i’m ‘gojo satoru’ like shoko said—”
“no,” you pushed. “because you’re a good person. you always go above and beyond for others and i’ve seen that as long as i’ve known you.”
you crossed a leg over the other and smiled softly. “and because of that i’m really not sure why you like me satoru, i haven’t really done anything special but—”
“what you just said is a crime. the way you think about me is the way i think about you.” he cut in, eyes serious. “you think you don’t do anything special? i literally watched you all through high school bend over backwards for people, for me, like i did,“ he sighed through his nose. “but your intentions were genuine and pure, mine were not.”
he finished the last of his bagel and crumpled up the wrapper into a ball, tossing it in the trash can next to him as he leaned back.
satoru swallowed. “i feel like if i don’t do the things that i do for people, ill end up disappointing everyone i know. i feel like everyone’s built this image of me that i don’t even know where the fuck it came from—” he shook his head. “but i don’t want to tarnish that. i don’t want to let people down. so i just let them ask me for stuff. i don’t even like going out that much either, believe it or not. i just go when they call.”
he crossed his arms. “whenever people do do something in return for me, it’s like i’m forever in their debt and they’re always expecting something from me back.”
your sad eyes softened, the confession in front of you a reaction from him you realized must’ve been buried deep deep down his chest— without any prior chance of resurfacing until this very moment.
you never thought about his situation this way. you would’ve never thought that satoru could’ve felt like this about his own reputation, something you guiltily believed was a thing he was absolutely floored over.
“you never expected anything back from me though,” he murmured. “you fixed my fucked up banners and switched around reservations when i absentmindedly chose the wrong thing for our school field trips, and you never said a word about it to me or anyone, and you didn’t expect anything back.”
he finally turned his bright blue eyes in your direction, and looked at you so deeply, so sincerely, that your mind went completely blank.
“that’s why i like you,” satoru bashfully scratched his cheek. “you do special things everyday and— and i was moved.”
there was a moment of silence, satoru staring at the ground as you stared at him, a delicate and insecure side of him unfolding before you that you don’t think anyone has ever seen, and you intended to keep it that way— wanting this special moment selfishly just for you.
you slowly leaned forward then as you made him look at you.
“its natural for you to be upset and think indifferently about people walking all over you, toru. it doesn’t mean you’re not genuine or pure.”
raising your arm, you poked his pink cheek gently and gave him a little comforting smile. “it actually only further solidifies to me how much of a good person you are. because even though people take advantage of your kindness, you help them with what they need regardless, and do way more.”
his eyes softened.
“at the end of the day, even though it makes you a little mad, you want to help people, because if you didn’t, you simply wouldn’t do it.”
you nudged his shoulder playfully with yours, “but not anymore, okay? from now on when people are blatantly taking advantage of how nice you are, you have to draw a line they can’t cross.”
he smiled wide.
“i’d let you cross it.”
“no not even me,” you shook your head. “not that’d i’d ever anyways.”
he looked at you, and then unexpectedly, satoru slowly leaned in and pressed a delicate, soft kiss to your cheek— his lips lingering there greedily for a few seconds more before pulling away, your shocked bright pink cheeks making him burst out laughing.
you missed class without even realizing, but you didn’t have an ounce of care in your body, seeing as satoru was worth more than anything from that point on.
since then you both hung out a lot more, and you still had your little quiet nights of self care, arts and crafts, and movies— except now, satoru was present in every activity.
satoru longed for your lifestyle, and you longed for his— so the act of watching movies together until two in the morning, making horrific origami bird shapes that never looked like the pictures in the instruction manual and laughing, sorting through his 80’s cd collection in his apartment while he sampled a few for you on his bass, and singing the cure so loud through his car sunroof while he drove you aimlessly at night with a strong grip on your thigh, were all a perfect blend of exactly what you both needed most.
it was several months of spending every waking moment together that you soon eventually became a little thing with satoru. there wasn’t an official label, and you guys hadn’t even kissed, but the longer than normal embraces, kisses on each others cheeks, and intertwined fingers everywhere you went was an obvious sign that something was there.
you picked up on how people looked at you more often rather quickly ever since satoru started bringing you around his circle, wondering how you came out of nowhere and captured his attention when thousands had tried for years.
and though most welcomed you with open arms and kind smiles, the majority of his girl fan base was bitter.
shoko often told you to just shake it off and not pay any mind to it, saying that it was a bunch of mean girls with nothing better to do, but it got a little harder once a pretty black haired girl named lina started grabbing satoru for conversations almost every night at the alley.
and today was no different.
“hi sweets!” satoru greeted you enthusiastically, pressing a wet kiss to your cheek as you arrived early to the pub to help him and suguru set up for tonight’s show. “you look very pretty today.”
“thank you!” you smiled wide and leaned up on your tippy toes, your body automatically pulling your lips to his until you quickly steered them to the corner of his mouth, pecking lightly before settling back down on the soles of your feet.
that wasn’t the first time you had almost accidentally kissed him, but it wasn’t just you, as satoru slipped up almost every second of every day when you both were together— the thought making you laugh internally as you followed him to the stage.
“don’t help out this time—” he pleaded gently with you as he took a high barstool chair for you and dragged it closer to the stage. “i want you to just sit and be pretty.”
you tilted your head to the side. “why toru? i don’t mind helping out i like it—”
“no i know!” he smiled sweetly at you. “but i want you to just sit there and relax and not lift a finger tonight. you’ll hurt yourself if you do.”
you giggled softly and nodded, hopping up on the stool and wringing your fingers together on your lap as you watched satoru set up his amp and readjust his mic stand, gnawing on your bottom lip as you watched the way his biceps and chest looked in his black compression tee.
“are you thirsty sweets?” he asked, his eyes trained to the ground as he untangled a bunch of chords and threw them behind him. “i can get you something from the bar?”
“oh no!” you shook your head quickly. “it’s okay toru you’re busy—”
satoru hopped off the stage and jogged over to the bar, him exchanging a few words with the bartender that you couldn’t quite make out until he jogged back over with a cold glass of sugary iced tea, placing it on your table under a coaster.
“for you.”
you smiled sheepishly, “thank you.”
“if you need—”
“satoru! hey!”
you snapped your head over to the entrance and saw lina, her wave a little flirty as she bounced over to the both of you.
lina only spared you a glance before her sparkling suggestive eyes landed back on satoru.
“oh hey?” he looked over at the clock on the wall. “im sorry, the alley doesn’t open for another two hours—”
“oh i know!” she twirled a strand of hair with her fingers. “i just wanted to stop by and see if you needed any help? you know, setting up?”
what.
your eyebrows pinched together and you looked at satoru, waiting for his answer.
“oh! um— sure! thanks!” he smiled at her, and you felt a pang of annoyance through your chest as you watched him lead her on stage and give her directions, much like how he did for you when you helped out.
you crossed a leg over the other and looked away.
satoru wasn’t your boyfriend, so it wasn’t like you could say anything or feel the way that you did… but then again, isn’t he kind of? you didn’t know, and the more you wracked your brain to try and figure out what exactly the both of you were, the angrier you got at the situation in front of you.
satoru flashed lina his world famous dazzling smile, cracked joke after joke and made her laugh, helped her when she went “confused” and helpless, and even showed her basic chords on his bass when she asked.
you pursed your lips, eyes narrowed. satoru was smiling at her the way he smiled at you and cracking jokes the way he joked with you, and your jealousy only grew as you let your mind wander if the way satoru treated you was actually anything significant if he was willing to do it for some random girl.
you sat there for what had felt like forever, people starting to pile in for the show as the alley opened, and you hopped off the stool bitterly to cool off in the restroom, not bothering to let satoru know.
just as you got in line, you felt a hand tug at your wrist.
“y/n!”
you turned around and spotted shoko, smiling until she took in your annoyed expression.
“what’s wrong?”
“lina,” you muttered.
“oh god,” shoko leaned her weight on one side of her hip. “what the fuck is she doing now?”
“satoru help me, satoru how many chords does a bass have? satoru you’re so good at singing! satoru you owe me after this!” you mimicked, your heart heavy as you let shoko lead you back to your table.
“she’s getting braver,” she muttered. “say the word y/n and i’ll fake trip and spill my drink on her it’s easy—”
you snorted, “no no, it’s okay shoko. if satoru wants to let himself be drooled over and do nothing about it in respects to me, he can be my guest.”
the show started, girls already screaming and running up the stage with, of course, lina front and center by satoru, jumping and wiggling her sick fingers up at him.
satoru was like he normally was at his shows— attentive to everyone and being just who he is, but what ticked you off more than usual was how much attention he was paying to lina, way more than the rest, and you couldn’t even watch the stage anymore when satoru reached down and held her hand for a moment, not once glancing up at you.
you were done.
“i think i’m gonna go!” you shouted to shoko over the music.
“what?!” shoko grabbed your arm. “don’t go! it’s almost over! i wanna see you chew him out!”
you laughed and shook your head. “i can’t stand being here, and he clearly doesn’t care whether i’m here or not right now so—”
more screams.
both of your heads snapped to the source.
lina was on stage with him.
you scoffed and grabbed your purse, ignoring shoko’s protests as you pushed your way through the crowd and away from the stage.
when satoru finally decided to scan for you through the pub, his eyebrows furrowed as he saw your seat empty and shoko glaring straight murderous daggers at him.
“where is she going?” he mouthed to shoko.
“home!” she spat loudly, getting up herself and disappearing through the crowd.
satoru’s eyes immediately widened, his fingers clammy and numb as he started to pluck the wrong notes, suguru giving him a weird look.
“carry the show without me,” satoru quickly told him, frantic. “please, i have to go.”
suguru nodded and waved him off, seeming like he knew why satoru’s skin was sickishly pale as he carried on calmly.
it wasn’t like you to just leave without him or not tell him anything, so as he threw the strap of his bass over his shoulders and handed it to a tech member, he hopped off stage and ran through the crowd, ignoring their pleas of protest or the tugging he felt at his clothes.
you were halfway down the parking lot when you heard the pub door slam open and footsteps running towards you.
“sweets!—” satoru yelled. “hey- where are you going?!”
“home!” you yelled over your shoulder, arms crossed as you kept walking.
satoru’s stomach dropped.
“y/n!” he caught up to you and grabbed your shoulders, spinning you around as he tried to catch his breath. “why? are you okay?”
“just fine!” you spat. “why don’t you go back on stage and drool all over lina—”
“lina?” he gawked. “drool? what are you talking—”
you shrugged his hands off of your shoulders. “do you not see how she’s been all over you for what seems like fucking months?! and you just let her! i’ve been ignoring it but today you really pissed me off—”
you turned away again and he immediately grabbed your waist with his hands, pulling you back.
“hey- no. tell me what i did okay just tell me—”
you scoffed. “you really don’t see it? first of all she came to the alley two fucking hours early today, and then she’s all over you and you’re all over her and you’re smiling at her and making her laugh like you do with me, and then she’s playing the little damsel in distress helping you set up while i just sat there and watched—”
“all over her?” his eyes narrowed. “i couldn’t give less of a shit about lina—”
“apparently you do!” you moved away from him, his hands falling from your hips. “because she’s giving you the ‘i wanna fuck you eyes’ every two seconds, and you’re holding her hand while you’re on stage, and then you literally pulled her on?! what the fuck am i supposed to think with that?!”
“i didn’t pull her on she jumped on!” satoru exclaimed, his arms out. “i’m sorry sweets that i didn’t notice okay i really am, but have you stopped to think that maybe i didn’t notice because i don’t care about her? i—”
“satoru you’ve been completely ignoring me the minute she got here—”
“toru.” he cut you off, voice firm. “it’s toru not satoru.”
you stopped, frustrated and hurt tears slowing brimming your eyes as you looked at him. “maybe you being a little flirt for everyone was okay before, but the minute you decided to butter me up and kiss my cheeks and call me sweets, that should’ve been over.”
“it is!” he exclaimed. “it’s been over! it never even started in the first place!”
“yes it did! you think i haven’t been watching how you are with people since high school?— you know what i’m done. i’m leaving.”
you sniffled and spun around again, but satoru only grabbed your wrist tightly and wrung you back.
“you think i haven’t been watching you?! i’ve loved you since fucking high school god dammit! i’m obsessed with you! when we officially met at the alley and i introduced myself i already knew your name and you know that! i don’t give a single living fuck about lina or anyone else but you! it’s always been you!”
you wiped your tears roughly with your sleeve.
gojo satoru loved you.
“so no. you’re not done. please don’t cry. all i’ve ever wanted was you and i let you slip through my hands in high school because i was a coward, and id rather die than let you slip through my fucking hands again and lose you over a stupid fight when i just got you!—”
“you’re not losing me i’m not going anywhere toru where the hell are you getting that from?!” you exclaimed.
“thank fuck then, so what are we still doing?! i’d cut everyone in my life off if you asked me to!—”
“no don’t do that! i was just jealous okay and i’m— and i’m angry—”
“okay but do you love me?!” he pushed angrily.
“yes! of course i do you know that!”
“okay so do i baby so what the fuck are we still fighting for?!”
“i don’t know!”
“stop giving me your little attitude then and come kiss me!”
your lips instantly collided with his as you threw your arms around his neck, fast hurried kisses that knocked the wind out of you as you both hungrily and fiercely tried to swallow each other’s lips, satoru tapping the back of your thighs and signaling you to jump on him.
you immediately sprung up and wrapped your legs around his waist, him holding you tight as he carried you over to his car and leaned you against the backseat door, his lips messily licking and swiping over yours as he seemed drunk on the taste of your sweet spit alone.
satoru dug through his pockets without breaking from your lips and found his keys, unlocking his car with a tap of a button and gently lowering you inside, him scrambling in after you and slamming the door shut, locking it.
he towered over you as he latched his lips back on yours, you laying flat on your back with your legs spread, satoru’s big cold hands on the sides of your thighs as he slowly slid your tiny little denim skirt further up— right up until he felt your silky panties under his fingertips.
“i gotta—” he said in between kisses. “take them off—”
you nodded quickly. “please take them off—”
satoru didn’t even let you finish before he practically tore your panties down your legs and stuffed them in his back pocket, his breathing erratic.
“oh my goodness,” he spread your legs gently, eyes completely wide and glazed over as he looked at your slick and shiny pussy. “you’re so pretty baby, just like how i pictured you.”
he ran a finger down your slit and your hips jumped, your teeth biting down on your lower lip as you let out a symphony of whines that satoru wanted to record on his phone and play morning, noon, and night for himself and his dick.
he stared mesmerized at your fuzzy pink cheeks and swollen wet lips as he slowly rubbed over your clit, you immediately grabbing his unoccupied hand and sticking his middle finger in your mouth to suck in response.
“oh my god—” he threw his head back, his delicious adam’s apple bobbing up and down as he swallowed. “you’re gonna make me cum in my fucking pants.”
he felt you bob your head up and down slowly on his finger and his head snapped down, eyes widening as he watched you act like a little slut for him, his hands with a mind of their own as he inserted his unoccupied middle finger in your slurping hole.
you let out a muffled gasp through the digit in your mouth and you spread your legs wider, his long and mouthwatering finger pumping in and out of you slowly, satoru’s body literally shivering at the sounds of your warm squelching pussy.
“listen to her baby…” he hummed. “she’s so fucking loud for me… how embarrassing.”
“toruuu,” you whined at his teasing, clamping your legs shut as you felt the tip of his finger hit that sweet spot in your walls that made your toes curl.
“open your legs.” he demanded. “who said you could close them, hm? i sure fucking didn’t.”
satoru picked up the pace and slipped in his ring finger without warning, your walls stretching and filling up as he abused your little cunt rapidly.
“you ever squirted before baby?” he huffed out, lips eating up your neck as you shuddered, your body jolting up and down at how fast he was fingering you.
you shook your head dumbly. “n—no, i don’t think i can—”
satoru laughed and bit your neck meanly. “yes you can sweets, your little pussy was just waiting for me to do it.”
he went even faster, a series of slap slap slap’s filling the car as his palm and digits hit your cunt repeatedly, sticky and soppy as he moaned over and over in your ear, absolutely intoxicated with the sloshing noises of your pussy and the way it was speaking to him, satoru utterly and incandescently obsessed with everything that was you.
“m—my god—” he panted, his pace brutal and animalistic as his long fingers rapidly plunged into your gummy hot hole, his tongue licking and slopping all over the side of your neck, your moans straight up filthy as the windows of his car fogged up.
“fuck fuck fuck fuck—” he dragged his mushy kisses from your neck up to your chin and back to your lips. “be my girlfriend—” slap slap slap— “p-please be my girlfriend be my girlfriend i need you so bad i c-can’t live without you anymore—”
you eagerly nodded, your thighs shaking as you gripped his shoulders and tried to keep up with his kisses that swallowed your lips up hole. “y-yes— mph! i will toru i will—”
his car shook violently as he fucked your cunt with his fingers without mercy, an unfamiliar intense feeling bubbling up at the pit of your stomach as he did so, your entire pussy pulsing and swollen as you squealed, massive droplets of liquid spraying all over satoru and the leather seats of his car.
“fuck yes baby, give me what i want that’s it—”
satoru groaned so loudly as you squirted, him jerking his nasty fingers to selfishly get more out of you.
“thaaaats it sweets—” he panted, slowing down. “that’s it.”
you evidently blacked out at this point, your brain misty and distorted as you tried to come down from your delirious high, a high you’ve never ever felt before with your own digits.
satoru licked his fingers raunchily and lowered his face to your pussy, cleaning up any remnants and left over drops on your thighs and pussy with his perverted tongue, your body jerking and you whining again as you shut your thighs closed in overstimulation.
he came back up and wiped his mouth with the back of his hand before flashing you the biggest most innocent smile, as if he didn’t just absolutely destroy your cunt minutes ago without grace.
slowly, you regained a sense of direction and finally looked at him properly as he sat down and pulled you gently up by his arms, your body practically limp as he settled you on his lap and hugged you affectionately, his cheek squished up against your forehead.
“so can you squirt or what.” he teased softly, a smile still on his face.
you giggled shyly and buried your face in his neck. “i made a mess.”
“that’s literally what i wanted don’t even start.” he mumbled, and you laughed again, louder this time.
“were you serious about me being your girlfriend?” you asked suddenly, your voice smaller and timid. satoru pulled back and tilted his head, catching your eyes with his.
“of course i was,” he said quietly. “i literally begged you while my fingers were knuckle deep in—”
you covered your face with your hands and laughed with a whine. “stop! okay okay! i get it.”
you took your face away from his neck and looked at him properly, tilting your head cutely as your eyes shined and sparkled with affection, him giving you the same look back as you leaned up and pecked his lips lovingly.
“you know…” you began. “when we first properly met and you asked me out that night, shoko told me there was a line i had to stand in if i was interested in you.”
satoru snorted, his eyebrows raised. “a line?”
you nodded. “mhm. you literally can’t pretend there isn’t one toru… and lina is in it too,” you finished off, snickering.
he rolled his eyes and huffed, feigning annoyance, but when he looked at you again, he only smiled and stared at you like you hung the moon and stars yourself, a blush to his pale cheeks that never seemed to go away as long as you were around.
“line or not—” he sincerely spoke.
“you’ve always been the first one.”
#gojo satoru#jjk#jjk fanfic#jjk x you#jujutsu kaisen#gojo satoru x reader#jjk fluff#jujutsu gojo#gojo x reader#jjk gojo#gojo#satoru#gojo smut#jjk smut#geto suguru#yuta okkotsu#nanami kento#choso kamo#gojo x you#gojo fluff#gojo x y/n#yuta okkotsu x reader#yuta x reader#jjk yuta#geto suguru x reader#nanami kento x reader#choso x reader#jjk x reader#jjk geto#jjk yuuta
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Company (jjk)
Pairing: brothers bsf!jk x fm!reader
Sypnosis: Your longtime crush who happens to be your older brothers best friends walks into you humping your pillow to the thought of him
Warnings: 18+ smut, unprotected sex, dry/pillow humping, nudity, reader has an IUD, etc…
Note: hey yawl it’s been a while… if anything sounds off jus so yk it’s not proofread :)
You’ve always carried a long crush for your older brothers bestfriend Jeon Jungkook.
Your ages being separate by 2 years, you’ve always remembered the chicks your older brother Taehyung would sneak into his room after a night out meanwhile your parents slept peacefully in their room.
As of now, this carried onto his current college days. Attending frat parties along with his best friend since childhood, Jungkook.
Your heart ached to be seen as nothing but Taehyungs younger sister to jungkook and others known to him. Especially when after those late night outs you’d come to find a chick wrapped around Jungkook’s meaty arms. You wanted jungkook to see you as a woman who harbored deep feeling for him.
And so, your decided to attend the same college as your brother. It not being that far off your home moving onto campus was not required. Unlike jungkook whose family had moved farther off from town your parents gladly took him in. Knowing him since he was a little boy they allowed him to crash in taehyungs spacious room.
This only made your crush on him worse, you were too shy to even start a conversation with him. Despite your shyness he always acknowledged your presence, never making you feel left out or ignored. Your interactions with him were limited, and every convo was initiated by him with little teases and silly remarks. He’s such a kind guy, no wonder your lingering crush only heightened with him staying in your home.
Classes were over for you and generally Taehyung was always the one to drive you home considering he had a car. A sudden message from him vibrates your phone you carry in your palm.
3:52 pm taetae: not on campus so I asked jk to give you a ride home today
great.
pulling into the campus parking in his car was jungkook, “hey, tae asked me to drive you back home for today he’s out so he’ll be back tomorrow” he said with his silver pierced charming grin
“hi, thanks for driving me back home” you said with your typical shy demeanor as you made way into the passenger seat of his car
“don’t worry about it, sweets”
oh.
That was the nickname he’d given you many many years ago cause of the constant snacking of sweets and candys. He payed notice to that then coining you the nickname “sweets”
You turned your head faced to the direction of the window to hide the rosy cheeks he gave you from pet name
Too shy to keep the conversation going jungkook spoke, bringing up school and asking about your classes. All came to an end once he pulled into the driveway of your home.
“Your brother won’t be back today, he’s spending the night with jennie today”, jungkook said while opening the refrigerator to get a class of water.
dammit.
You thought to yourself. You’re parents are out at work and don’t arrive til 9pm. So that means it’s just you and Jungkook for the meanwhile. What a mess, you figured you were gonna stay locked in your room for the remaining time until your parents got home.
“Well, I’m just gonna work on my assignments due tomarrow…”
“Alright, I’m off to the gym. In case anything happens feel free to call me, okay?”, the tattooed man said.
The muscular man did go to the gym everyday though. Usually around 4:30pm for about at least 2 hours.
“Okay” last thing said between you two before grabbing his gym bag and making his way out the door.
“Hey Jungkook?”
“Yea?”
“Thanks for looking out for me”, this time you held onto the eye contact made between both irises. Making sure to illuminate your gratitude to him.
He offered you a grin from his silver pierced lips, “no problem, sweets”
You could not get Jungkook out of your head. It was impossible to focus on your assignments without thinking about the tall raven hair tattooed man with the bunny smile. He lingered your mind, causing stress.
Closing your MacBook and tossing it aside you decided to relieve this aching stress that invaded your mind but also the lingering ache between your legs.
You rid yourself of your clothing only remaining in your cropped tank and underwear.
Positioning your pillow between your legs in which your body hovered over you made onto your pillow searing yourself upon it.
Arching your back and you rocked your hips back and forth onto the wrinkled textured fabric of the pillow. The lacy panties you were currently wearing added to the ecstasy. Following the flow of movement adding friction and pressure to your needy clit.
“mhhpp, fuck” gasping out while you retracted your head back then forward.
The layered front strands of your mid length hair covered your face due the continuous movement of your head. Tucking them back behind your ear once again.
“j-jungkook! s’good, feels so good…” you desperate whined as you chased your high.
Gripping onto the pillow leaving your knuckles white due to the pressure of squeezing while leaning forward.
Your pillowy nipples lacked attention, your fingers latched onto the buds from the outside of your tank. You weren’t wearing a bra so the thin shirt was the only separation between your calloused fingers and hardened buds.
Getting rid of your shirt and panties you were bare entirely. Your only audience being the plushies corner of your bed watching the show you gave them.
Is what you thought, too oblivious and deep into your own world to have heard the sound of the car pulling up into the drive way, to have heard the sound of the front door opening and footsteps. To have noticed the presence of the same man whose name you constantly let slip past your moaning lips watching you reach your high on your pillow at the thought of him.
He watched your ass jiggle at the rapid movement of your hips, along with the movement of your breasts The way your face contorted into an expression of pleasure with your teeth biting onto the plump of your lips. The sight in front of him had his length twitching in the gray sweats he changed into before leaving the gym.
“g’na cum, please let me cum…fuck jungkook need it so bad!” you desperately expressed.
At the final rock of your hips you released, a shivering orgasm causing you to rip a pitched whine.
The movement of your hips lessened as you rode out your orgasm. Tired and worn out after that workout your head began to wander off.
Until.
“Quite the performance you showed off there” your heart dropped
There he was. The same man that you’d been rubbing your pussy against your pillow at the thought of watched you get off.
“Jungkook!” you wanted the ground to swallow you whole at this very moment.
Quickly grabbing into your discarded clothing at an attempt to cover your bare body. Unaware of what to say in explanation to the presence in front of you.
“I-I…”
No words could come out or your mouth as you watched Jungkook walk towards you with a darkened expression.
Removing the piece of clothing from your grip at attempt of concealing yourself. His eyes remained at your bare figure. Tempted at the sight of your hardened nipples, goosebumps covered your skin.
“Fucking hell, look at you. Getting off to the thought of me? You’re so damn cute…”
The eye contact made you aware of the glint in his eyes, a message he was trying to convey.
“Jungkook?” you quietly questioned
“You gonna let me do what I want with you, hm? Is that what you want?”
Your eyes remaining in contact with his glistening ones, you nod your head in response.
That was all it took from jungkook to commect your lips with his. Hungrily capturing your mouth, sloppily stuffing his tongue down your throat causing him to groan and you to whimper at his roughness.
“Open your legs, baby. Show me how wet your pussy is”, you obeyed and showed him your glistening folds lathered in your cum.
Taking his tattooed hand and gathering the substance on his fingers he brought them to his mouth. The taste of your discharge coated his tongue as he cleaned it from his fingers.
“Fuck, you’re as sweet as your nickname. You sure live up to it”, he said as he continue to lick clean his slick coated fingers.
Your fingers inched towards the hem of his sweats, encircling the strands of the waistline.
“What is it you want, sweets?
“You.”
“Take me out, baby” fuck, that practically confirmed to you he was hiding a big package under there.
Lowering his sweats his hardened cock sprung free from the confided layer of fabric.
Taking his length in your palm toward your warm mouth to lubricate it with your saliva. Jerking him off in a up and down motion earning you grunts and groans from him.
“Just like that, fuck…keep doing that n I’ll cum” he gritted out.
Pushing you onto the soft surface of the bed you watched as he removed his clothing. You admired his muscular physique, the gym really did pay off.
“Are you really sure about this?”
“Yes, I’m sure” confirming.
“Condom?”
“It’s okay I’m on an IUD, I’ll take an after pill tomorrow”, reassuring him
He hovered over your body, hiding in the crevice of your neck to leave a few pecks while aligning his length to your heat.
Your chest heaved deeply as you exhaled, the slight burn of his size rubbing toward your tight walls ignited pleasure.
“mhpm! j-jungkook..” wrapped arms on his back as he thrusted in you, increasing the pace as you let out more moans and whimpers.
“I know, baby…ya’ feel so good, so warm n’ tight”, he cooed.
At sudden movement his arms then wrapped around your thighs hoisting you up while the relentless abuse to your cunt never stopped.
“Ahh! f-fuck! Jungkook!”, Now in the standing missionary position, he was in deeper than you’ve ever experienced. The motion of his hips thrusting at an unforgivable pace, all that was heard was the sound of his balls smacking against your sopping pussy filling the entire room.
“shit, m’ gonna cum”
“m-me too..” your climax right on the edge.
With that both of you reached your highs, his thrusts began slowing down to ride out the climax. Both the mixture of your cum riding from his abdomen down his leg.
Laying you down on the soft surface of your bed with his cock still soft in you. Enjoying each other’s company as you laid in his embrace.
“Jungkook, are you gonna tell?” you innocently say with genuine concern written on your face.
“Now why would I do that? I’ve been waiting for this moment for quite a long while now. Why? Do you not want this?”
“No, I do! But when you say you’ve been waiting for this moment for quite a while now, what outcome do you expect to come from this? Taehyung will find out sooner or later and it’ll get messy.” your questioned further anticipated his response.
He let out a sigh, “you see sweets, I’ve envisioned this moment to occur, I’ve gotten off at the thought of you just like you showed off earlier. I want you just as bad….” he admits.
“I don’t see you as just my best friends younger sister, I see you as much more”
“Jungkook?” fuck, he’s worried. What if the feelings are mutual as what he initially believed they were? What if we only meant it to be a quick fuck?
“Hm?” Oh well.
“I see you as much more too”, you don’t know where this sudden burst of confidence came out but this weight you’ve been carrying has been lifted after your confession, you feel more at ease.
Both your gazes locked in with one another. Both leaning into each other as your mouths then mounded into one.
The kiss was deep and passionate, although you both have confessed your mutual feelings for each other, there’s something different about it. Feeling more as acceptance and comfort.
“The things you do to me y/n, you don’t get it”.
“You’re mine, all mine”
Pt 2?
#jungkook smut#bts smut#jungkook x female reader#jungkook x reader#bts imagine#jungkook fanfic#bts imagines#bts jungkook#jungkook#slut4jeon
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can you please do something with a clingy and jealous katsuki?
you asked, i delivered!
katsuki being jealous? always.
he’ll never show it in public of course until you guys are alone, that’s when he starts being clingy. you and denki are close friends, have been since before you and katsuki started dating. says he was the one that “put you on” or whatever. katsuki has never had a problem with him, besides his awful teasing he never saw him as competition.
“denki give it back, i need it!” you slapped denki’s arm, he was testing your patience. denki stole your mirror, which you needed in order to finish getting ready. mina had rushed you out of your apartment in order to get to the local fair on time. you both had somehow convinced the others to join you so there you were, seated in between katsuki and denki while mina was in the passenger seat and kirishima driving. “hello i need it too! jirou’s performing tonight y’know.” he extended his arm out further, making it impossible for you to reach.
“give it ba-“
kirishima made a sharp turn, causing you to put your hand on denki’s thigh while the other was still reaching for your mirror. katsuki immediately took notice of your hand placement and crossed his arms, only giving you a typical “tch”. you quickly readjusted yourself back into your seat, denki giving you your mirror back. “my bad ..” the rest of the car ride was silent, the only noise playing was mina’s music.
as the group got out of the car, you realized you needed a few more minutes before you were ready. “go on without me, i just need to fix my hair!” katsuki waited for you to finish, he watched you in silence. “can you help me suki?” you turned to look at him, he was still watching you. he sat there manspreading, arms crossed, and with a pout on his face. you always notice when katsuki’s jealous, he makes it so obvious to you. “katsuki baby, are you jealous?” you turned on your side, putting your legs over his thigh. “‘m sorry.” he turned to look at you, uncrossing his arms. there’s just something about you that he can’t stay mad at.
he grabbed you, placing you on his lap. you were stunned by his sudden action, but katsuki was always like this when he was jealous. he wanted to remind you who you belong to, obviously him. you wrapped your arms around his lean, muscular neck, while his hands trailed down to your hips. he put his head on the crook of your neck.
“just put your hands on me next time, tch.” you grabbed his cheeks, rubbing them with your thumb. “i always put my hands on you, how can i make it up to you?” you placed a kiss on his temple, but before you can pull away he presses his lips against yours. he puts his hand on the back of your neck the other caressing your hip, as he’s pulling you closer. he’s addicted to your lips, the way they feel, their shape, everything about them. you pull away, he’s gasping for air. “suki you’re gonna take my makeup off .." you wipe your lips with the back of your hand. "yer’ too pretty sitting on my lap like this, baby. can’t get enough of ya” his hands trailing up to your waist, you both knew the group was waiting but they can go on a couple rides without you.
you both ended up having to use a shitty excuse to explain why you took so long.
#bakugo bnha#bnha#katsuki bakugo mha#katsukibakugou#mha fanfiction#bakugou x reader#bnha bakugo katsuki#bnha bakugou#katsuki bakugo x reader#katsuki fluff#lissdiaryreqs!!#muah katsuki#katsuki x y/n#katsuki x you#bakugo katuski#bakugou katsuki#bakugou x you#mha bakugou
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please give me nasty ass hate sex with Logan in the xmansion turns out he’s a dick but one with feelings for you and you matched his energy and he got pissy and upset then confessed after hate sex xx
note: aggressive Logan might be the best Logan.
———
“Knew I should’ve rode with Scott,” y/n said as she leaned back in Logan’s passenger side seat to look out of the window. Logan’s known for driving for a good five minutes before saying something he knew she didn’t want to hear.
“I’m just askin’ why the fuck you’re so hooked on that man. Ain’t he with Jean?” Logan asked, making y/n scoff. “Yes, Logan — That’s why we’re not dating! We barely talk, only as friends. Jesus!”
“Don’t seem like friends when you’re giggling and grabbing the man,” Logan shrugged his shoulders as he kept his eyes on the dark long road. “We’re just friends, and Jean is around us all the time,”
“Aren’t you the one who tried getting at her while she was with Scott!? And you’re fuckin’ talkin' about me — the ignorance,” y/n rolled her eyes as the man’s grip on his steering wheel tightened.
“That was long before you got here. Over her now,” Logan said, making y/n laugh. “Yeah, or maybe you’re shitty because a woman finally didn’t want you over a sweeter guy,” y/n pouted in his face for a few seconds before leaning back into her seat again.
“I get what I want, alright? There was just no need to try with her. Too much work,” Logan said. God, y/n hated him. He hated Scott more for making her ride with Logan to get some talk time in.
“Yeah, of course it was. Bet I could get her before you,” y/n said, only wanting to make the man mad, and it did. “You already slut for Scott, so how about you get him,” his tone was stern.
“I don’t slut for him! Like, are you jealous or some shit? Let’s be for real, because you always have something to say about the man and me. Everyday day!”
“Jealous!? Yeah, you fuckin’ wish I was jealous of someone like Scott. Anything he has, I can get,” Logan scoffed, really thinking he could. “Where is Jean then?” Y/n asked as she turned towards him, with a fake confused face.
“Where the fuck is she then? Because she ain’t here,” y/n said. “Can you just shut the fuck up,” Logan said low, keeping his eyes on the road to avoid eye contact with the young lady.
“No, I wanna know where the anything he has, I can get, is at,” y/n continued, making the man’s blood from her smart mouth. “Where Logan!?” Y/n yelled at him.
“Shut the fuck up!” Logan took his eyes off of the road and leaned towards y/n speaking through his teeth and tone sounding like a growl. Y/n shrugged her shoulders with a roll in her eyes before sitting back in the passenger seat.
“That’s fuckin’ it,” Logan slammed on the brakes before putting the car in part. The angry man exited his vehicle, slammed the door behind him, and walked around the back to get to y/n.
Y/n was confused, not thinking he would leave her out there, so she just assumed he got out to cool down. Y/n laughed low, thinking she finally got the man before her door swung open.
“Get the fuck out,” Logan cussed as he grabbed y/n by her forearm. “Hey, get the fuck off of me!” Y/n shouted as she tried pulling back, but the man was strong, leaving her door open and dragging her around to the front of his car.
Logan slammed y/n’s upper body on top of the hood, making her cry out from the short pain. The way he handled her was rough, but she wanted to act rough, right? So she’ll get it.
“Get the fuck off of me, you dumb bitch!” Y/n called the man out of her name, making him grab the back of her neck to pull her up then slam her back into the hood.
“Keep runnin’ that fuckin’ mouth, and ima ruin it,” Logan threatens the girl, making her keep quiet but she kept fighting, wiggling and kicking under him.
“That’s what I thought. Keep quiet, bitch. Always runnin’ that fuckin’ mouth like you don’t got a hole to fill,” Logan had his cock pulled over his jeans and belt. Now he’s tugging at her x men suit he refuses to wear.
“L-Logan-“ y/‘ tried saying, but he did the same as last time, slamming her onto his hood. “You tell me what to do one time, and ima hurt you, and ion think a pretty girl like you wants that, don’t you?” Logan had brought his claws out next to her face to intimidate her, and it worked.
She wasn’t scared of the man. Not one bit. She just knew how angry he could get, and that he was too strong to not get what he was shooting for her.
“Telling me I don’t get what Scott gets. You think you’re fuckin’ hard to get? Huh!? You think your little whore ass is hard to stuff and impress?”
“Oh, Bub, you gotta be dumb as fuck if you think you ain’t. All I gotta do is stuff this pretty little thing, then treat you right. Give you money, gifts, and massages,” Logan leaned down towards the girl's heart as he dragged his fingers across her now exposed pussy.
“Bet you want that, don’t you, baby? I don’t mind. Don’t mind keepin’ you to myself so I don’t have to see that bastard hands all over you again,”
Logan pushed to fingers into the girl, curling instantly to get a reaction out of her, and he did. A good one that he’s dreamt of hearing.
“Knew you wanted me. Just look at how much you’re clenching my fingers,” Logan teased as y/n shifted on the hood of his car, trying her best to keep in her moans or show how good this felt, but she failed.
“It’s okay, baby — Don’t gotta feel embarrassed. Been smellin’ this pussy for months when you’re around me. Wet as a fuckin’ waterpark. So fuckin’ wet,” Logan groaned at the smell he’d been secretly sniffing at for forever.
“P-Please, stop that,” y/n begged, feeling him curl in the best places he could ever curl in. He knew where she needed it, which made this whole situation seem more hot to her.
“Why? Gonna cum? Thought you hated me. Now you’re gonna leak on my fingers. So fuckin’ pathetic,” Logan growled in the girl's ear, pressing his body on her to give her a better feeling.
“Cum for me, y/n — Cum so I can stuff you with my cock. Been hard ever since your sexy ass stepped in my car. Always smellin’ so fuckin’ good,” Logan sniffed the girl's neck, making her whine at the thought of Logan being that obsessed with her.
Y/n couldn’t hold anything back anymore. She came around his fingers with a loud and broken moan, hearing his own grunting in her ear. He was getting off on making her feel good.
“Ah huh — My good girl soakin’ my fingers for me. So fuckin’ good for me,” Logan pulled his fingers out of her and then sucked on them, licking every inch with an eye roll. She tasted amazing.
“For a bitch, you do taste good,” Logan said, calling her out of her name to get a reaction, and he did. Y/n lifted her body to turn around and swing, but he quickly slammed her back on his car with a chuckle.
“You worm stronger than me, baby girl. Gonna have to take my mouth for a few more minutes,” she could hear the smirk on his face, and she hated it. She hated him, but god were his fingers magical.
Before y/n could think of anything to say or do, Logan squeezed his cock in her hole, pushing and stretching her until she couldn’t take it anymore.
“What’s up, baby? To much? Too much cock to talk back to me?” Logan asked as her cries cracked. She felt pressure in her stomach. He was huge, and he knew that. He’s always wanted to watch her take him.
“C’mon, baby, talk back. Call me a bitch. Say I can’t get a woman to save my life. Say I can’t get you. Tell me you’re not easy, and I’ll pull out of this leaky cunt,” Logan said, knowing she wouldn’t and couldn’t say anything.
“That’s what I fuckin’ thought. Keep that fuckin’ mouth shut from now on, or I’ll tear you just like this in front of the crew,” Logan told no lie. He was an animal, and marking what was his was what he was best at.
“Yeah, I know, baby. So fuckin’ big. Gonna give you this every day. Train you to take my cock, and my cock only. I’ll know when you’ve been a whore. I’ll know if you let Scott touch you,”
“And let me tell you if he does. If he does, y/n, I swear to god, I’ll fuck the mutant outta you. I’ll make you a brain-dead human. Make you so fuckin’ dumb on my cock, he won’t even want you anymore. Only I will,”
Logan tugged y/n’s hair, making her back arch and her ear meet his mouth. “Gonna breed this lil girl, then take you back to my room. You’re around me twenty-four seven, now. You ride with me, and me only. I catch this pretty ass on Scott’s motorcycle, and I’ll fuckin’ claw it off,”
Logan couldn’t stop threatening y/n. He wanted her to know she belonged to him, and no one else. After he stuck his cock in, he was going to make her know that. This was finally a time to mark her.
“Mhm hm — So good. So so good,” Logan whispered in the brisk ear as his cock twitched. Y/n whined, knowing he was close. Before she could tell him to pull out, he began filling her up.
Y/n cried low, scared of what he just did, but at the same time, he seemed like he was going to do anything to make her keep it. The way he talked to her and handled her like she’s been his forever, made the situation feel better.
“Fuck,” Logan breathed out as he let y/n’s hair go and leaned on her back, cum still spilling in her as her walls clenched around him.
“Fuck,” Logan said, this time in a different done. In a more what did I do tone. “Fuck, y/n,” Logan pulled out of the girl and fixed himself up quickly, feeling his heartbeat raise.
“Y/n, we gotta- I- Fuck, I don’t know what I just did,” he admitted. “Shit,” Logan pulled y/n off of his car hood slowly before turning her around to rest and a more comfortable way.
“You still here, baby?” Logan asked, hands rubbing her cheek to comfort her. “Mhm hm,” she mummed, making him smile slightly. “Good. Thought I lost you for a second,” he chuckle.
“Wanna go back to my room to rest? Kinda had a long, uh, long ride?” He said. “Wanna go to my room. Scott was supposed to meet me-“ Y/n cut herself off with a laugh, watching his face drop.
“That shit ain’t funny,” Logan said as she kept laughing. “You ain’t goin’ back to your room. As a matter of fact, I’m moving your shit to mine,” Logan pulled y/n off of the car and guided her back to the passenger seat.
“I was just playing, Logan. When I say me and him are friends, I mean it,” y/n assured the man. “Don’t care,” Logan shut the door in her face before going back to his driver's seat.
“Logan,” y/n said as he got in the car silently. The man ignored her and started the car, upset Scott’s name was brought up in any way. He hated that. He only wanted his name to roll off of her tongue.
“Logan,” y/n leaned over to him to rest her head on his shoulder. “Don’t think that’s gonna work, Bub,” Logan said, face on the road with no emotion.
“Mhmkay,” the girl lifted her head up to lean back in her seat, but Logan stopped her with his right hand and pulled her back. “Ian says you can move though,” he said, making her laugh.
Logan chuckled before placing a kiss on her forehead, not knowing how he got here, but he knew it was right. He knew this little thing he’d been having towards her was just some middle school love.
#logan howlett x fem!reader#logan howlett x you#logan howlett xmen#logan howlett x reader#logan howlet smut#logan howlett smut#logan howlett#dark!logan howlett#dom!logan howlett#james howlett x you#james howlett x reader#james howlett smut#james howlett#dark!james howlett#dom!james howlett#wolverine x female reader#the worst logan x reader#wolverin smut#wolverine x you#wolverine x reader#wolverine smut#wolverine xmen#wolverine x men#wolverine#dark!wolverine#dom!wolverine#hugh jackman x reader#hugh jackman x you#hugh jackman smut#hugh jackman
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girl girl hear me out YAPPER GF X REGULUS!! Pls pls pls like u could do anything u wanted with them!!! I have a few ideas (take any or none)
May be she just walks up to him one day like clearly wanting to befriend him cuz she has a lil crush and just starts yapping about how the great hall had her fave pastry for breakfast today and he's so confused but also intrigued and then she starts sitting next to him in classes and asking him to hang out at hogsmead and she just yaps and sometimes she thinks may be he zones out but then he'll bring up this super niche detail she mentioned last time like "hey what happened to that quill you forgot in the potions lecture?"
they r already dating and she worries she's too much energy and talk for him and tries to be quiet and he's just like r u sick? R u mad at me? What's wrong u haven't gone on a 30 min description/rant about ur day
3. May be someone else brings up she talks a lot and Reggie defends her?
you guys really love your bubbly/talkative readers with Regulus, don't you? (so do i); thanks for your request!
Regulus Black x yapper!reader who didn't think he was actually listening
CW: fem!reader, rolling thoughts, brief mention of difficulty making friends, people talking about reader behind her back, swear words (on ellecdc? nooo [sarcasm])
Your family said that you had an incessant need to fill silence from the moment you could talk.
“If there’s a room with our daughter in it, you can be certain that it won’t be quiet.” Your mum had proclaimed as she beamed at you lovingly one day.
While it was certainly a trait that your family had always found rather endearing, you felt that it made it particularly difficult making friends once you began attending Hogwarts.
But the friends you managed to make loved you for it, and they had often stated “you can call her what you want but you can’t call her boring.”
That didn’t mean your other classmates appreciated your stories or tangents, though.
Which is how you ended up serving numerous detentions for speaking during class or lectures and disturbing the students around you, and how you’d been cycled through numerous seat partners in potions class.
And that is how poor Regulus Black ended up stuck sharing a worktable with the likes of you.
He didn’t seem to mind, though. And if he did, well, he certainly never said anything about it.
You were quite sure he tuned you out during your rambles, hardly ever sparing you a glance and keeping his eyes trained on his parchment in front of him as he took dutiful notes during lectures.
Couldn’t be you, however.
No.
You were too busy lamenting about the fact that you couldn’t get more than twenty feet to the mooncalf herd up the hill behind the quidditch pitch before they would all run off. They only came out at night, you see, and you wanted to take some photos of them. Some photos turned into midnight picnics, and picnics turned into sharing apple slices by means of throwing them towards the bug-eyed beasts and watching them argue over the slice until you threw another. But even after feeding them forty seven apples and counting at this point (Winky the house elf from the kitchen was not pleased with you), they still wouldn’t let you get any closer to them.
Your next course of action was to try a smellier and higher value treat; you wondered then if mooncalves could have tuna? Tuna was certainly smelly enough. Well, if you couldn’t entice the mooncalves, you’d certainly entice a cat or two.
You wondered then if mooncalves and cats got along? Kneazles were nearly the same size as the poor beasts, but cats were much smaller. You figured cats would look at a mooncalf the same way they’d look at a goat.
You’d seen a cat ride a goat once, not many people believed you, though. You’d have to learn how to make a pensieve one day just to prove it to everyone. You didn’t much care for goats, though; something about their square pupils seemed alien to you.
Which seemed odd considering there were numerous beasts in the magical world that really were quite alien, yet it was goats that did it for you.
And why were they always associated with the devil? Was it because of the square pupils? Do you think there’d be a book that explained that?
But you didn’t even realise that the period had ended until Regulus stood and collected his books, offering you a curt nod before leaving the classroom.
Fuck….do you think he’d let you copy his notes?
⋆⁺₊⋆ ☀︎ ⋆⁺₊⋆⁺₊⋆ ☀︎ ⋆⁺₊⋆⁺₊⋆ ☀︎ ⋆⁺₊⋆⁺₊⋆ ☀︎ ⋆⁺₊⋆⁺₊⋆ ☀︎ ⋆⁺₊⋆⁺₊⋆ ☀︎ ⋆⁺₊⋆
Merlin’s tits, she never stops talking! I feel bad for the poor sod stuck next to her; Black probably wants to avada himself every class. You heard a classmate mutter as you walked to your workbench, movements slowed as you lowered yourself into your chair and tried not to let their words hurt you.
You were used to the comments, you were used to the sentiment honestly; did they think it was easy being you? Did they think you didn’t get tired of listening to yourself too?
Of course you did, it was exhausting; your brain never stopped moving, and apparently, neither did your mouth.
But it did hurt a little, perhaps because Regulus had been quite gracious about it thus far. He had listened to you carry on about the astrological significance of space waste and how that was affecting the magic of the stars. He had listened to you bemoan about the positive impact that centaur migration had on local flora and fauna and how the fencing of fields and forests was going to cause unimaginable damage to the life cycles of such. He also had listened to your morose mooncalf story and the update the next day that you were able to order cans of tuna via owl to the castle.
And he’d not so much as bat an eye at you.
Certainly he’d have said something to you if you bothered him?
Although, perhaps this was why Slughorn put him beside you, because he knew Regulus wouldn’t say anything; had Regulus done something to anger Slughorn? Was placing you beside Regulus less about you driving your seat mates crazy, but more about being a punishment for Regulus?
Well, you couldn’t imagine Regulus had done anything bad enough to deserve a full term with you as a potions partner.
No, you decided, you would not be his punishment.
So when Regulus entered class that day, and Slughorn read out the instructions for today’s potion brew, you resisted the urge to speak.
You were quiet when retrieving your potion ingredients, you were quiet as you checked and double checked the brewing instructions, and you were quiet as you waited for the potion to reach its boiling point.
You actually thought you’d done quite well; you sort of wished you had started a timer, this may very well have been a record for you.
Well, unless sleeping counted. Would sleeping count as being quiet? Oh gods, what if you talked in your sleep too!? You’d have to ask your roommates.
“L/N.” Regulus called as if it hadn’t been the first time he’d done so. “You alright?” He asked, ducking down in an attempt to meet your gaze as you watched a divot appear between his brows.
“Yeah? Why?” You asked, finding yourself furrowing your brows in solidarity; you found Regulus to be too pretty to look so worried.
He shrugged his shoulders and straightened up, though the space between his brows remained divoted. “You’ve been awfully quiet, s’all.” He murmured quietly, and you were surprised to see a dusting of pink on his cheeks.
“Isn’t that a good thing?” You muttered perhaps pointedly; his eyes narrowing to match the furrowed brows.
“Says who?”
Your eyes traitorously darted to the students who had been discussing your habits, and Regulus followed your gaze.
He rolled his eyes and muttered something in French under his breath as he turned his attention back towards your shared potion. “Those tossers are just mad that they have nothing of value to say.”
You more felt than heard a disbelieving breath escape your lips as you looked at Regulus in bemusement.
He didn’t seem to notice though, as he continued to the next step in your potion and carried on. “Did the tuna work?”
You stared at him dumbly before your brain kicked back into gear. “I beg your pardon?”
“The tuna.” He repeated. “For the mooncalves?”
Oh.
“Oh.” You started, giving your head a shake as you tried to find your balance you had long lost during this conversation. “Erm, no, but I did indeed attract a few cats.”
“Ah.” Regulus offered, smiling at you (or at the expected poof from the potion signifying that the two of you had brewed it correctly thus far).
“Also, I found out why goats are often associated with the devil, but the book you’d be looking for is Biblical in nature.”
You stared at him with your mouth agape as he continued. “There’s a quote where that Christ bloke mentions something about separating people from one another just as a shepherd separates the sheep from the goats. They’re used as a metaphor for the ‘bad’ or ‘inferior’ member of any group; it could also be understood as the divide between the pure and the wicked. I say goats got a bad rap, though.”
The next step in your potion brewing process was to allow the potion to simmer until it turned a milky white colour, so Regulus lowered the heat before appearing to remember something.
“I almost forgot…” He started as he began rooting through his book bag. “I asked the shopkeep at Brood & Peck, and she said this is a favourite of mooncalves; maybe you’ll have more luck tonight?” He asked as he held out a parchment of beast treats to you.
“You’ve been listening? This whole time?” You whispered in awe as you took the bag delicately as if he had just handed you a delicate china dish.
His brows furrowed again as he searched your eyes. “Well…yeah? I’m rather invested now.” He explained just as your potion turned its intended colour.
“Very good Mr. Black, Miss. L/N.” Professor Slughorn commented as he walked past your workbench.
You were alerted to the fact that class was over when everyone’s potions were vanished with a pop and students started to pack up their belongings.
“You’ll keep me posted, yeah? About the mooncalves?” Regulus asked as he started walking backwards towards the door.
“Sure.” You murmured, earning you a wide smile from the notoriously quiet boy.
Yes… You’d be more than happy to keep Regulus Black posted.
#marauders era#marauders au#marauders fanfiction#reader insert#self insert#regulus black#regulus black x reader#regulus black x you#marauders#the marauders#regulus black fic#regulus black fluff#regulus black ficlet#regulus black blurb#regulus black imagine#yapper!reader#fem!reader#ellecdc fics
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[3k] a f1 gossip page gets insider knowledge of what might be the paddock's best kept secret. in fact, it is so well kept that even the paddock don't know who it is about (aka a wee crack fic i couldn't get out of my head ft the papaya bunch).
series masterlist
.
It was media day at the Barcelona Grand Prix when the rumours began.
Somewhere between team media duties and the official conferences, a group had found themselves lounging in the shared canteen. It was a neutral zone, the journalists weren’t allowed inside and it was just a place for most of the drivers to relax with their family and friends outside of the garages and motorhomes.
You were sat in the seat next to Lando, his arm sprawled over the back of your chair and his thigh pressing against yours with how close he was sitting beside you. He was looking over your shoulder, a giddy smile on his face as you went through a few of the shots he had taken on his camera that morning—including an obscene amount of ‘candid’ shots that you made him swear not to post anywhere, despite his reassurances you looked gorgeous.
It was a startled laugh from Daniel that caught everyone’s attention.
“There’s no fucking way!” Max laughed as he gaped at Daniel’s phone screen, shaking his head as he did. “Where the fuck do they get this from?!”
Daniel only laughed harder.
It took a few minutes before the Aussie finally turned his screen around and display the tweet for everyone to see. It took a few more minutes of snooping to find the article that followed the bizarre rumour.
“Alright, who’s gonna fess up?” Lando joked as his eyes glanced over all the drivers currently sprawled across the various tables. “My bet is on Carlos. He seems like the kinda guy to have a secret kid.”
“Shut up,” Carlos scoffed before he nodded to the boy on his right. “It would obviously be Charles.”
The Monegasque spluttered out a laugh, his cheeks heating up. “It’s not me!”
“That’s what someone who has a secret kid would say,” Max retorted, seeming to enjoy the way the Ferrari driver’s face began to match the colour of his shirt. “You can tell us the truth about Charlie Junior.”
“First of all, I would never name my child that,” Charles said with his nose scrunched up in displeasure. “And I wouldn’t hide my children. I would be proud of them.”
“They could be hiding the children for privacy's sake. A paddock isn't exactly the best place for a child to be roaming around. Or the safest,” another voice spoke up and everyone’s eyes fell to the younger Aussie sitting across the table from you. Oscar squirmed a little under the sudden attention. “What?”
“You wanna tell us something, mate?” Lando questioned, a grin growing on his face.
Oscar’s cheeks burned red. “I-It’s not about me!”
“You caught him,” Logan laughed as he playfully knocked his shoulder against his friend’s. “He has three kids back in Australia. Our lil’ Oscie is a father.”
Oscar frowned. “Don’t ever call me that again.”
“I’m offended you didn’t tell us,” you joked as you knocked your foot against his shin under the table. “I expected to be the godmother of one of your kids.”
“You would be if I had any,” Oscar quickly countered, making you snort in response.
“Well, we have some clues,” Daniel commented as he leaned back in his chair, looking far too amused with the situation. “Time to start going through possible suspects.”
“Maybe you’re trying to throw us off your scent,” you joked.
“Shhh, sweetheart, they can’t know about our secret family just yet,” the Aussie teased as he sent a wink your way.
You felt an arm tighten around you and turned to see Lando glaring—albeit, jokingly—towards his former teammate. “Back off, Ricciardo, if anyone is gonna have a secret family with her, it’s gonna be me.”
Daniel laughed. “Please, the two of you couldn’t keep a secret from us if you tried!”
“Uh, we so could,” you retorted.
“You two couldn’t even keep Oscar’s surprise birthday party a secret and it was your idea,” Logan pointed out, raising his hands in mock surrender when your head snapped around to look at him.
“We got excited!” You defended.
“And you don’t think you would be excited about a secret family?” Oscar countered.
“I think we could hide a secret pretty damn well if we tried,” you replied with a shrug as you leaned further back into your boyfriend’s embrace.
“Especially as something as serious as a secret family,” Lando added with a nod.
“Who cares?” Max eventually said with a laugh. “The rumour is a load of bullshit anyways. There’s no way anyone is going to believe it.”
As it would turn out, the whole world believed the rumours. The rest of the race weekend was haunted by the ‘new’ piece of gossip. The paddock was full of whispers of ‘who?’, the journalists thought they were being sly as they snuck in a few questions to catch the drivers off guard, and hundreds of fan theories took over every social media platform as the weekend commenced.
Truthfully, you thought it would be one of those rumours that dragged on for a bit as a joke but died down by the next weekend.
You were very wrong.
...
...
You didn’t realise how wrong you were until the Austrian Grand Prix came about the following weekend.
With both McLaren drivers wrapped up in some nonsense challenge video the media team had set them up for, you had made your way towards the Williams garage to spend your Thursday afternoon with them instead.
There was a cosy spot in the garage where you found yourself sat with Logan and Alex as the team buzzed around them, whispers and talks of the car’s potential that weekend. You were laying back in your seat, your feet thrown over Logan’s lap as you chatted away to Alex when the American caught both of your attention.
“There’s two!”
Logan lifted his head to find two matching confused expressions staring right back at him.
“There’s two,” he repeated as he turned his phone around, a single tweet sprawled over his screen with an all too familiar username on display. “Two kids! A driver is hiding two kids!”
You snorted. “You have got to be shitting me. One rumoured kid wasn’t enough so they added another?”
“This driver has certainly been busy,” Alex mused as he took Logan’s outstretched phone, beginning to scroll through the never-ending comments under the tweet. “I guess the long term girlfriend thing does kinda narrow it down.”
You raised your brows. “Don’t tell me you think it’s real.”
“I still have my bets on Oscar,” Logan commented with a grin, his eyes crinkling in the way you knew they did before the boy laughed. “He’s a dodgy guy. I bet he’s Formula One’s own Hannah Montana with a whole double life.”
“And, what? We are a part of his famous life?” You questioned.
“It would make sense,” Alex supplied with a shrug. “He could have a normal family back home in Australia and no one would even know.”
You rolled your eyes. “Alex, don’t encourage him.”
“Hey,” Logan frowned.
“If it turns out to be true, you wouldn’t be upset that your best friend hid something like that from you?” You retorted, watching as the boy’s face slowly fell.
Alex snorted.
“I need to go talk to….someone about…something,” Logan said vaguely before he quickly stood up, knocking your feet off his lap and rushing out the garage with a serious look on his face.
“Logan!” You called after him, laughing as you did so but it was a hopeless endeavour. He was a man on a mission and you knew nothing would stop him. “God, I should go before he ambushes the McLaren motorhome.”
“Life as a parent, huh?” Alex joked, nudging your shoulder and snickering when you rolled your eyes.
“Who would have thought I would end up adopting an American of all people?” You joked back before standing up. “Time to go stop my eagle son from throttling my kangaroo son.”
Alex flashed you a smile. “Motherhood suits you.”
“Oh, shut up,” you rolled your eyes.
And little did you realise there was a certain pair of ears listening in to your playful conversation with the Williams driver, already drafting up a message before you left for the bright orange building a few garages down.
...
...
It was odd for you and Lando to find any alone time during a race weekend and it was mostly due to the two rookie drivers you had somehow adopted.
It started off as a comfort thing at first. Lando knew what it was like to be young and new to the sport. He knew that even if he was coming in with friends, it still felt daunting. It was the reason he seemed to take Oscar under his wings after the Bahrain race weekend, despite the boy’s initial awkwardness.
It had been you who gravitated towards Logan. Your heart warmed at the sight of your boyfriend helping out his younger teammate, but it completely shattered when you were making your way towards the McLaren garage and spotted a certain blond rookie hidden between motorhomes. He almost looked as though he was trying to make himself seem as small as possible.
Lando didn’t question it when you started to venture to the Williams garages in between practices and media duties. He saw the look in your eyes, the small spark that showed your determination. He knew your kindness knew no limits and he would never even try to stop you.
Neither of you realised you were signing up for the roles of the 2023 rookies’ grid parents until Logan and Oscar had sauntered into Lando’s driver room and all but settled themselves between you both on the Thursday of the Baku Grand Prix.
You didn’t mind it, really. Race weekends tended to be hectic and chaotic on their own, so it was rare that you and Lando would spend much time alone. Beyond the exasperated sighs and joking remarks, neither of you minded when Oscar would lay his head on your laps after a gruelling interview or when Logan would ramble about some American custom he swears all three of you would enjoy.
It was odd not being the youngest ones on the grid anymore, but there was also something so comforting in knowing you were a safe haven for these two boys in the paddock—and sometimes, even off the track.
So honestly, it was an utter fucking shock that you and Lando found yourselves alone with time to kill in his driver’s room, especially with it being the Silverstone Grand Prix weekend.
Neither of you questioned your luck for very long before you found yourself straddling your boyfriend, knees on either side of his hips and ass firmly planted on his lap. His hands were shamelessly groping your ass. Your hands were tangled in his curls, tugging a little harsher than usual just to hear his little whimpers in between kisses. It was shameless and sloppy and a little more than either of you intended—but you didn’t have a single issue with it.
“Shit,” Lando moaned, his voice a little more high-pitched than usual when your lips met his neck. “I fuckin’ missed this.”
“Yeah?” You murmured against his skin, your tongue dancing along a particularly sensitive spot just below his ear. “I missed hearing how pretty you sound.”
“You can’t say stuff like that,” Lando grumbled, his eyes fluttering shut as he pulled you closer, as he pressed his body against yours.
“But it makes you blush and you look so cute when you blush,” you teased as you lifted your head, admiring the pink tint to his cheeks. “My pretty boy.”
“You’re a tease,” Lando muttered as he sat up on the couch, as he pulled you closer so he could press his lips against yours again.
“You love it,” you retorted, the words mumbled in between kisses.
“So fucking much,” he grinned into the kiss, his hands wandering down your thighs before slowly moving back up to your ass.
In fact, it had been so long since you and Lando got a chance to utilise your time alone in the paddock that you forgot the first rule of making out like horny teens on the small couch—lock the fucking door.
“HOW COULD YOU—OH MY GOD, MY EYES!”
“GROSS! WE DID NOT NEED TO SEE BABY NUMBER THREE BEING MADE!”
If it weren’t for the tight hold Lando had on you, you would have been flat on your ass when Logan and Oscar stormed into the room. You stared at the boys in shock, your cheeks heating up as the mortification of the situation washed over all four of you.
You quickly moved yourself off Lando’s lap, instead sitting on the couch beside him as you stared at the two rookies who currently had their hands over each other’s eyes.
“Have you ever heard of knocking?!” Lando sighed.
“Have you ever heard of a door lock?” Oscar retorted.
“Touche,” he muttered back with a nod.
“You know you can look now,” you told the boys, a little amused with their theatrics. “We aren’t naked.”
Logan hesitated. “Promise?”
“Promise.”
Both boys slowly dropped their hands and, truthfully, you were expecting for them to instantly break out into whatever excited ramble they had come to tell you both. It wasn’t unusual for them to do as much, to want to share something with you and Lando that amazed them but didn’t want to admit to anybody else in fear of seeming like…well, rookies. They knew you and Lando would never judge their excitement to the world of Formula One and all the little quirks they were discovering.
Except, there was no excited storytelling or massive grins. Instead, both boys stood in front of you with frowns on their faces and their hands on their hips.
Lando’s brows furrowed together. “What? What happened?”
“Why did you two not tell us we are older brothers?” Logan asked bluntly.
You blinked. “Huh?”
“Why did you not tell us we are older brothers?” This time it was Oscar who spoke up. “Why are you gatekeeping our little brothers from us?”
Lando frowned. “Is this a joke? Is that a punchline? Am I being stupid right now?”
“We get the others on the grid but us? This is a new level of betrayal,” Logan said with a completely serious look on his face.
You shook your head, utterly baffled by the two boys. “What the fuck are you guys on about?”
“You have been hiding a secret family from us! You are the ones the tweets are talking about!” Oscar said as he reached for his phone, turning the screen around so you both could see the latest article.
“WHAT?!”
“You have been keeping a secret from us. Families don’t keep secrets!” Logan accused, his eyes narrowed slightly. “If we even count as your family now.”
You gaped at them. “You seriously think that article is about us?”
“There’s proof!” Oscar retorted.
“What fucking proof?” Lando questioned, his brows furrowed together in confusion. “How can there be proof for a family that doesn’t exist?”
As it would turn out, the informant that had been feeding the gossip page the whole narrative had been also secretly recording conversations they had heard around the paddock. Along with the article, a series of 'leaked' audios were also released and they were, in fact, yours and Lando’s voice.
This person had managed to record countless conversations you shared with Lando and even some other drivers—even the conversation you had with Alex the previous weekend in the Williams garage.
“Remember we have dinner with the boys tonight. Our reservations are at six.”
“Did you remind them to put sunscreen on before they went out? I don’t want them to burn.”
“Who knew being a parent was so hard, huh?”
“Your son is bullying my son for his accent again. Make him stop or you’re both getting grounded.”
“Well, he definitely takes after you!”
Random lines of conversations taken completely out of context and, truthfully, you could understand why Twitter was going crazy. It seemed undoubtable that you and Lando were talking about your kids, it sounded like you truly were two parents discussing your children—if it weren’t for one large and missing piece of information.
“We were talking about you two, dumbasses!”
Both boys stared at you, blinking a few times. “Huh?”
“We are talking about the both of you in every single one of those clips,” you told them and you couldn’t help but let out a disbelieving laugh. “There is no secret family—just you two.”
“Oh,” Oscar murmured.
“But—oh,” Logan muttered a few seconds later.
“So this whole rumour started because somebody thought we were talking about actual kids,” Lando noted before snorting. “Fucking hell.”
“Everyone thinks you’re a dad,” you remarked with a laugh. “The boy who has one piece of tupperware that’s hanging on for dear life.”
Lando grinned back. “Well, I may not be a dad but I am a—”
“If you call yourself daddy, I am breaking up with you.”
Lando only laughed harder.
“So…you don’t have secret siblings you’re hiding from us?” Logan piped up, a shy smile on his face.
You shook your head.
“Oh thank god,” he breathed out, pressing a hand on his chest. “I knew you wouldn’t betray us like that! We would obviously be the first ones you tell, right?” There was a pause. “Right?”
“Well, we walked in on them almost conceiving a child,” Oscar pointed out with a shrug before his nose scrunched up in disgust. “Please don’t conceive our little sibling in front of us.”
“You were the ones that stormed in on us,” Lando retorted.
“Still.”
“Well, consider this your warning to get out in the next thirty seconds, otherwise you’re gonna see something that will really scar you—”
Your cheeks burned. “Lando!”
“What?” Lando flashed you a cheeky grin. “If they are gonna make up rumours about me being a dad, I may as well start practising for the real deal.”
You rolled your eyes.
...
liked by charles_leclerc, danielricciardo and 354,762 others
landonorris does this mean i officially get the dilf status?
view all 15,866 comments
user aww cute!
user WAIT THIS IS WHO THE RUMOUR WAS ABOUT
user lando needs to pull a carlisle cullen and adopt me into the family
yourusername in my humble opinion, i think dilf suits you perfectly ;)
oscarpiastri ew
yourusername you're too young to be on instagram
logansargeant and you are too old to sexting on instagram
yourusername you're grounded
user I CAN'T BELIEVE THIS
user okay but the photos are actually so cute wtf
user THEY BECAME GRID PARENTS INSTEAD OF ACTUAL PARENTS
maxverstappen1 they had to start somewhere
danielricciardo i'm just happy the safe sex talk we gave lando actually worked. got worried for a second
yourusername you were just scared you would become a grid grandpa
danielricciardo GRANDPA???
user nothing will ever beat this rumour
user THE FACT PEOPLE ACTUALLY THOUGHT HE HAD A KID
user TWO KIDS
user FAMILY JPEG ACCOUNT WHEN
landonorris 👀👀👀
.
#lando norris#formula one#f1#lando norris x reader#lando norris x you#lando norris x y/n#lando norris fic#lando norris one shot#formula one x reader#formula one x you#formula one x y/n#formula one fic#formula one one shot#f1 x reader#f1 x you#f1 x y/n#f1 fic#f1 one shot
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it took me by soap-rise
contents ౨ৎ ⋆ k. bakugo x fem reader. 4k words — fluff. cursing. slightly suggestive. ⭑ of course your public nuisance no. 1 has to hog your favorite shower stall the day you forget your body wash in it.
Katsuki was honestly starting to suspect he wasn’t your type.
Which one, was something he’d never even bother to consider. He’s ripped up more confession letters than he can count after three years. Graduation was just around the corner and he still hates social media, but even he knows how popular he is on it because of his classmates whining about it all the damn time. He knows he’s well-liked, and it’s not just his ego talking.
Genuinely it's a thought that would never occur to him, if only Eyebags wasn’t lounging around you all the time, casting annoyingly cocky glances at him as he taps your shoulder and leans in to whisper whatever the fuck it is in your ear whenever he passes by the two of you.
Not that he cared.
Two, when Dunce Face dared you to say who you thought was the most attractive guy during a game of truth or dare in the common room last year, while he pretended to be disinterested when he very much in fact was not, you had offhandedly answered with that half-n’-half bastard’s name, who could not be more polar opposite to him.
Again, he really couldn’t give less of a fuck.
Not like he’s been thinking about it since then. Totally. Not.
Katsuki also hasn’t been thinking about how it should be him whispering in your ear instead of that purple haired extra, the endless list of things he could say to make you squirm and blush in your seat.
Of course, that doesn’t happen because you’re too busy arguing with him, like usual, about the new group project Aizawa just assigned. Something about reconnecting with their roots before graduating. With you two as partners, much to the amusement of your classmates.
“We should work on the script first!” You insist while he leans back in his chair, observing you get more and more worked up.
It should be irritating as hell, your hand gestures, your matter of fact tone, but what’s really bothering him is that it’s not. He’s not sure when that started happening.
“It’s better to prepare the interview questions we’re going to ask our parents when we visit each other's homes.”
He snorts. “What are we, some ditzy news report crew? We’re not gonna waste time doing that, we should just visit your place first, then mine and get it over with.”
You spin away from him before he can open his mouth again, and raise your hand.
Aizawa slowly turns to you with a sigh, already knowing what you’re about to ask.
“No.”
“But Mr. Aizawa!”
Eyebags casts an amused glance in both of your directions, and Katsuki scoffs.
No way in hell was he letting you switch and downgrade to an extra like him.
“What, you’re chickening out?”
You ignore him. “Can I please switch partners?”
“No,” Aizawa deadpans.
“But—“
“No. One more word from either of you and you’re getting zeroes.”
The both of your mouths snap shut, and you glare at each other.
“When you’re a pro, you don’t always get to choose who you team up with.”
Aizawa rubs his temples.
“And you’re supposed to be my top ranking students. You’re not first years anymore, so act like it.”
You hang your head. Like a scolded puppy, Katsuki notes.
“Yes Mr. Aizawa.”
From the corner of his eye, you flip him off under your desk and his lips can’t help but twitch. Does he really still piss you off that much after all this time?
Without hesitation, Katsuki flips you off back.
‘Fucking teacher’s pet.’ He mouths with a smirk.
‘Asshole.’ You mouth back.
Aizawa sighs again, throwing a pointed look at Sero and Denki who are struggling, and failing, to hold back their giggles behind you.
This was going to be a long week.
It’s the day after the group project was assigned, and you’re still reeling from the fact that out of everybody you had to get paired up with, of course it had to be your crush.
Hey Siri, does it make you a masochist if for the past three years you've been in love with a guy that’s laser-focused on his personal development and has zero interest in dating anyone other than his career, ever?
Are you a masochist if you kind of find that kind of hot?
Just when you were starting to make a pros and cons list with Mina the night before to try and ick yourself out, too. But even that was getting increasingly hard to do.
His growth was undeniable, and you curse at him for being almost as mature as he was attractive now.
Well, towards everybody except you.
Three steps away from the door to your room, you freeze in place as your brain stops your usual ramblings of the blond boy to register two alarming facts.
One, the bottle of body wash you usually use was not in your hand like you thought it was.
Two, it was in fact, still in the shower stall you left it in.
Pink house slippers slap against the floor’s carpeting as you race back to the showers with a death-like grip on your towel.
You’re slightly out of breath as you clutch the doorway of the showers, and just as quickly as you enter you find yourself exiting lightning fast at double the speed, nearly launching yourself against the wall of the hall outside.
With your heart racing uncontrollably, tips of too familiar blond hair disappear into the stall you were in moments ago.
Too familiar, for your liking.
But that strong jawline you caught a glimpse of was unmistakable.
Your irritating classmate slash crush you were trying to get rid of was taking up your shower stall.
Okay technically it wasn’t yours but it was the one you used everyday, each morning and night. You’d claimed it when you first stepped foot in it at the beginning of your first year.
So basically, it was yours.
And you definitely don’t remember that bastard ever using it until today.
A screech jolts you from your thoughts. He must have turned the water on, which you can hear, but strangely there was no steam wafting out at all.
The realization creeps up on you like the sound of running water that trickles down and echoes throughout the room.
Hold on.
What was this idiot doing taking a cold shower at four in the morning?
The all too familiar soothing scent of cherry blossom fills the chilly air, and your eyebrows furrow even more in confusion.
And was that your fucking body wash he’s using?
You take a deep breath. Okay, calm down. He’s bigger than you, probably stronger too, that stupid gym freak, not to mention taller than you.
But your fingers were still itching to whip out your quirk and shoot a moonbeam at his crotch.
Because why the fuck was he using your L’Occitane Cherry Blossom Bath and Shower Gel?
Trying to sneak a glance to confirm your suspicions, the obvious shadow of Bakugo is visible through the glass, and you duck back into the hallway.
Oh my god, it is him.
Taking a cold shower in the morning like a crazy person. Although you hate to admit it, that would explain his perfect skin. Everyday you wake up and see his flawless face, you go to bed praying that he gets a blemish.
The shower turns off, and you let out the breath you were holding. Confrontation wasn’t your strong suit, but when it came to your possessions, you weren’t about to be a doormat.
You cross your fingers and pray that he’s wearing clothes.
“Bakugo! Come out here, we need to talk.”
He snorts, already recognizing the chiding voice about to round the corner, and turns. “Picking a fight with me outside of class? Thought you had more self-respect than tha–”
Bakugo is then sharply cut off.
By you hurling into his very naked, very bare chest.
He forces his eyes to not linger on the dip of your collarbone, and as he looks down on you he sees you struggling to do the same in his direction.
You accidentally make contact with his eyes.
The rare, amused look on his face sends something strange and hot down your spine, and you force yourself to turn away so sharply you think you dislocated your neck.
Bakugo smirks. “Wasn’t nearly this focused when we were working on our project.”
An embarrassing noise escapes from your mouth, and his lips curve ever so slightly on his handsome face at the sound.
He’s never seen you this flustered before.
It’s kind of cute, he admits this time.
Despite your clearly humiliated state, you point an impressively steady finger at the object in his hands.
“That’s um, that’s mine.” You awkwardly clutch your towel tighter, suddenly feeling very naked in his presence. Seriously, why didn’t you put a shirt on before coming back?
His eyebrow raises and he lifts the bottle slightly. “This?”
“Yeah?”
“Uh-huh,” he says disbelievingly. “Don’t see your name on it.”
You sigh in exasperation, did he always have to be so uncooperative with you? “It’s mine, okay? Just give it back.”
Bakugo's eyes narrow as he studies you. Like you’re a puzzle piece he’s trying to make sense of.
And as much as you hate to admit it, the focused look on his face was annoyingly attractive.
“That’s funny.”
You open your mouth, your patience is on the last straw and you’re about to yell back ‘what is?’ and snatch the bottle out of his hands when he smirks, holding it high out of your reach above his head with his bicep, still gleaming with water from his shower.
“Because this is mine.”
You blink at the water falls from his raised arm onto your nose, not registering what you’re hearing. Looking away from the pink translucent bottle above your head, your eyes meet his again.
“What?”
“You heard me the first time.”
You can’t help but stare at him incredulously.
“I don’t think I did.” Confusion could not be clearer than glass in your voice.
“You—You use L’Occitane?”
He averts his eyes from the droplet that falls from your still wet hair and rolls down what skin you have exposed, disappearing into your thankfully tightly wrapped towel.
“Dude. You are so not cherry blossom bath and shower gel material.”
He snorts. “Fuck is that supposed to mean.”
“I don’t know! I thought you’d use like, Dove MenCare or five in one.”
“Five in one? Are you stupid?”
“Apparently! But—Oh my god can you stop flexing your biceps for one fucking second.” You groan. “I’m trying to have a serious conversation with you.”
“Why were you looking?”
“I can’t help it! They’re distracting me and—“ You clap your hands over your mouth, glancing at his slightly amused expression with horrified eyes.
“Distracting you?” His voice is low, and you curse at the way your stomach flip-flops.
“Um.” Fuck. Where did that even come from? “I meant, uh.”
“Trying to take it back now?” He smirks. “Coward.”
“I am not a coward!” You glare at him. “And I’m not feeding into your ego.”
“You just admitted you were staring at my biceps and thinking about what body wash I would use.”
Okay, so you’re just digging yourself a deeper grave. Your cheeks are warmer than the shower you took earlier, and you can’t even deny it.
“Creep.”
You huff. “Okay fine, I’m a creep. Just give me my body wash back.”
“Told you,” he starts walking away, towel still wrapped around his waist. You pointedly look away towards the wall. “It’s mine, dipshit.”
“Wha–” You whip your head around just as he disappears behind the corner, too tired and irritated to even chase after him, and with a sigh you walk into the shower room, heading for the stall you used earlier.
Your eyes widen as you stare at it in embarrassment.
There your bottle of cherry blossom body wash sits, untouched in the shower caddy.
As you head back to your dorm room, the body wash safely clutched in your hand, you wonder.
Was it too late to call in sick for today?
Aizawa did not in fact let you call in sick, and you're painfully reminded of everything that happened in the morning as you complain to Hitoshi about it. Your best friend snickers as students file into the cafeteria behind his seat.
“You’re so stupid.”
You take the opportunity to shove a sweet roll into his open mouth. “Shut up! I’m going to pretend like it never happened.”
Hitoshi snorts, taking the bread out of his mouth. “Good luck with that. But hey,” He leans in with a mischievous grin, and you glare daggers at him. “Isn’t this the most progress you’ve made since you started liking him since, what, first year entrance exams?”
Your jaw drops. “Excuse me?”
He takes his sweet time eating the roll in his hand instead of elaborating, like the petty asshole he's always been. Your fingers tap impatiently on the table of the cafeteria as you wait while he chews.
After what seems like an eternity, Hitoshi finally swallows.
“I mean, you’ve never really made a move on him this whole time. Kind of just been a spectator, like a creep.”
Warmth rushes up your neck as you’re reminded of what Bakugo called you yesterday. Creep.
“I can’t help it! The only time we ever speak is during class projects, and even then we’re always arguing. I just don’t know what to say to him.”
“I know.” Hitoshi raises an eyebrow. “Woop woop. 3A’s own live little romcom.”
“I’m gonna kill you.”
“Okay, but after I finish this soup.” He blows on his steaming spoon, and pauses as a thought occurs to him.
”If he didn’t like it though, he would’ve told you by now.”
You can’t help but perk up at that. “You really think so?”
“Yeah.” He spoons the soup into his mouth. “Oh. This is good, why didn’t you get any when we were in line?”
“...The red color reminded me of his eyes too much.”
Hitoshi sighs.
“For your birthday, I’m going to admit you to a mental hospital.”
“It’s not that bad!” You insist and he snorts derisively.
The both of you know you’re lying.
The ride to Katsuki’s house after class is awkwardly silent.
Your folks conveniently went out of town to visit some relatives you’ve never even heard of yesterday, so the both of you were left with no choice but to interview his parents only.
The train is almost full, and every seat in the car is taken except one.
“I’m standing.”
Katsuki grabs onto the handle above his head, a silent signal for you to take the only seat left and watches with barely concealed amusement in his eyes as you hurry to sit in front of him without a word other than a small ‘thanks.’ So skittish today.
He’s not sure if he likes it though. You being quiet around him.
You’ve said less than two sentences to him since this morning, and he almost misses your snappy quips.
Almost.
He hides a sly grin. It’s all his fault you’re acting like this, and he's going to enjoy it while it lasts.
You’re putting your earbuds on, and just before you put the left one in, he snatches it out of your hands and puts it in his ear.
Your eyes widen cutely, too stunned to speak.
"Just don't play anything shitty." He turns his attention back to his phone, ignoring all the smoochy faces the group chat's sent him about you as he sends his mom a quick text to tell her you two are on the way.
With a shy nod, which he can't help but note is so unlike you, you scroll down on your own phone and click on a playlist.
Katsuki's eyes widen in surprise not even five seconds in.
The instrumentals, those vocals. He knows this song.
He loves this song.
"You listen to Pierce the Veil?"
You blink up at him. "Yeah. I do."
He can't help it. The edge of his lips twitch as he recalls what you said to him yesterday, and he mimics your exact tone.
"Dude. You are so not post-hardcore alt rock material."
The expression on your face is priceless.
Katsuki never uses his damn phone camera but he almost wants to snap a picture right there and then.
Except of course, you do the unexpected.
You giggle at him.
He can't help but feel a little proud. Take that, stupid fucking Eyebags.
"I guess you're right," you laugh behind your hand. "Jirou recommended me some songs last year and I've been a fan ever since."
"Then what's your favorite lyric by them?"
"Oh my god." The grin on your lips spreads a warm, sweet feeling across his chest, like strawberry jam on hot toast. "You're one of those people that see someone wearing a band shirt and go 'Oh you like them? Name five of their songs.'"
He scoffs. "I do not."
"You totally do."
Katsuki rolls his eyes. "You trying to distract me from the fact you're a fake fan?"
You fake a little gasp. "Me? Never." There's a thoughtful hum that comes from your lips, and he observes you as you take a moment to think.
"My favorite lyric has to be 'been counting the stars and scars, how I’m becoming a work of art.'"
The Divine Zero. Fuck, he loved that song too.
"Huh. Guess you know your shit."
You huff proudly, so similar to a dog happily wagging its tail that he resists the urge to pat your head. "Of course! What's your favorite lyric?"
He smirks, staring directly into your eyes.
"I’m gonna tear out the thread one by one from your skin till your bones feel embarrassed by all the attention."
Your lips fall into a flustered 'o' shape and you turn away when he finishes, nodding. "That's, uh, that's a good one too."
He bites back a laugh as you hurriedly switch playlists, and a familiar R&B tune starts singing in his ear instead.
Mitsuki’s face greets the two of you as she opens the door.
“Katsuki! You're here early—oh!"
She spots you.
“You’re one of those cute maid girls from last year’s cultural festival!"
Your cheeks flush as you remember. That stupid day when Denki’s suggestion finally won the class vote. She was visiting for Bakugo’s role as an oni in the haunted house, and happened to stop by the maid cafe in the class where you and the rest of the girls were working. “Yes ma’am.”
“I didn’t know you were Katsuki’s girlfriend.”
“What?” Your mouth drops. “Oh, I’m not—“
“You brat! You never told me you were going out with a sweet, pretty girl like this.” Mitsuki scolds in her son’s direction. Your cheeks grow warm as your curious eyes can’t resist trailing over to see his reaction.
"She's not my girlfriend, Ma."
Oh my god, was he blushing?
Mitsuki sighs in disappointment. His crimson eyes meet your widened ones for a split second, then he's brushing past the both of you and heading inside the house.
His mother smiles at you apologetically. "Sorry about him, his puberty came late."
You can't help but snort. "It's okay Mrs. Bakugo, I'm used to it."
"I heard that!" A yell comes from down the stairs.
Mitsuki and you share a mischievous glance, and she ushers you inside. You take off your shoes and look around.
So this is where Bakugo grew up.
There's the smell of green tea in the air, and was that a vanilla candle burning somewhere? Framed photos of Bakugo with his parents are on the wall as you walk into the living room, and you can't help but coo at the one where his chubby baby cheeks are smeared in frosting while he blows out a candle shaped like the number three.
The interview flies by in a breeze. You do most of the asking.
Okay, you’re the one asking all of the interview questions. A warm mug of steaming green tea is placed next to you on the coffee table from your cross-legged position on a cushion.
Bakugo sits next to you, unnervingly silent ever since his mom's outburst from before, as he types up his mother’s and occasionally his father’s responses on his laptop.
It’s funny, the way you think he doesn’t notice your shivers.
"Ma." He glances up from the keyboard. "Do you need to turn the AC up so damn high all the time?"
Mitsuki rolls her eyes, taking a sip of her tea. "It's warm in here!"
He sighs, eyes flicking over to you, and starts getting up from his spot on the floor.
You stare at the hand he holds out to you. And with great interest, so do Masaru and Mitsuki, who mutters something to him that you better be her daughter-in-law within the next three years.
"Come on," Bakugo says gruffly, tugging you to stand.
You stumble a bit as you walk through the hallway with him and up the first few stairs. "Where are we going...?"
"My room. To get you a fucking jacket."
“No, I don’t need it—!” You're cut off with a sneeze.
He groans, and shrugs off the black fleece-lined one he's wearing and bringing you into him by tightly wrapping it around your shoulders.
“Why don’t you ever listen to me?” He grumbles. He's so close you can see how unfairly long his lashes are, and you're not sure if it's the sheer nervous adrenaline from him being so near or the scowl in his voice but you giggle, feeling bold.
“It’s sexy to see you prove me wrong.”
His eyes widen, and he quickly recovers.
“You’re so fucking weird.” There’s an unmistakable fondness you catch in his voice as he says that, and you shiver this time for a different reason.
"Your jacket's too big on me." You flop your newly acquired sweater paws in his face.
“Shut up.” Bakugo snorts as he zips it up for you in one smooth motion. “Fucking baby.”
“You're the baby!" You retort. "I saw your pictures on the wall."
There's a groan from him. "No you didn’t.”
"What, they're cute! I'm gonna send one to the class group chat."
Bakugo shoots a glare at you, and you teasingly wiggle your phone screen in his face. "Don't you dare."
"Hmm, okay I won't. Only if you do something for me first."
He smirks. "Fine, what do you want?" Bakugo leans closer to you, and your cheeks burn hot. "A kiss?"
You were not expecting that.
The way your eyes linger hopefully on his mouth looks like he's right. "Um."
"Um?" He huffs a laugh with his face hovering in front of yours. Bakugo's hot breath teases your lips, and you can't think.
Fuck it, you don't even care if he's just joking anymore. If this is your only chance, you're going to take it.
"Yes."
Bakugo cocks his head to the side, irritating to the very end even when you're on the brink of giving in. "Yes what?"
Your eyes squeeze shut as you blurt out, and you can almost hear Hitoshi cheering in the distance.
"YesIwantyoutokissme!"
"Fucking finally." Your eyes flutter open at his murmur, what did he mean by that? But you don't get to spend another second thinking about it because suddenly his soft lips are on yours and your heart skips a beat as you realize Bakugo is kissing you.
It's feels almost scarily natural to lean into his touch, like a gravitational pull getting stronger and stronger the longer you're near him, and you wonder why you didn't sooner. You numbly acknowledge the growing sweatiness of your palms as your nose bumps against his gently.
His comforting hands cup the back of your head, tangling his calloused fingers in your hair as he guides your mouth against his. A delicious little sound escapes from you the moment you break away from him and it only makes him want to close the gap between you again with more hunger, and he nips at your bottom lip like a starved man.
"Knew you always liked me, by the way." Bakugo gives you a wolfish grin, as the both of you pull back for air, leaving a trail of saliva still connected to your lips in your wake. He slyly glances at your dazed self sideways, flashing you a rare sight of his canines.
"Was just waiting for you to stop being such a damn pussy about it."
#it took me by surpriseee the hatred in his eyess#y’all fw l’occitane cherry blossom bath and shower gel#katsuki bakugo x reader#bakugo x reader#mha x reader#bakugo fluff#bakugo oneshot#bnha x reader#mha oneshot#not this being the first mouth to mouth kiss i’ve ever written here lmfaoooo#idk ig physical intimacy means sm more to me than just kissing#but it seems fitting here so#enjoy <3#it might be bc i’m asian and pda seems weird to me LMFAO
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HAVE YOU DONE IT BEFORE?
HUH YUNJIN X READER
FT. LE SSERAFIM, NEW JEANS MINJI AND AESPA GISELLE
TAGS: VIRGIN, SIZE KINK, MOUTH CUM, CREAMPIE
3K WORDS
College is a different world. Girls celebrate when they take someone’s virginity. Body counts became a social status. The campus finds out that one of the freshmen in the basketball team is still a virgin. Yunjin, a popular sophomore, takes this as a challenge. On Halloween night, she sought to have your first time.
“How can I get the basketball team’s attention?” Yunjin is laying on a bed with her friends, brainstorming what costume they will wear at the Halloween party. “Let’s wear some Jerseys!” Kazuha sits up, surprised herself that she came up with that idea. “That’s not a costume,” chaewon interrupted. “It doesn’t matter, what jersey will we wear?” Yunjin is excited with the idea.
All heads are turned when Yunjin and her group sets foot in the Halloween party. For this year’s Halloween. It will be celebrated in one of the frat houses. It is a big house, and selected people can go to a few rooms to have “privacy.” They don’t need to look for the basketball team as they are the loudest and the most chaotic boys on the campus. They are seated in the lounge area of the house surrounded by girls who're also shooting their shots.
“The fuck?” Yunjin blurted when a girl who was dressed in a punk princess costume bumped into her. Minji, a freshman who looks too young to be in college, apologizes quickly. She’s looking around her friends who left her to be with some boys. “Watch where you’re going! Gosh,” Yunjin let it go just because she doesn’t want her mood to get ruined.
The girls walk up in front of the players, wanting to get noticed. A senior saw the girls wearing Lakers jerseys. “Lakers! Lakers!” The team erupted in a chant. “Do you know the lakers?” Another senior asks the girls. “Tell us about them for tonight” Yunjin rebutted with a smile. Kazuha’s plan of wearing a basketball jersey just worked. Now all she needs to do is to have private time with the freshman.
She’s looking around to find the Freshman as he only saw him in pictures. The freshman is in the corner in between some sophomore’s players. Yunjin’s eyes widened when she noticed that the freshman was bigger than some players. The freshman has been recruited in the basketball team based on physical aspect alone. You are the back up center of the team as they ought to develop your skill set with his 4 year tenure in college.
You are taller and bigger than anyone your age, that’s why you grew up being an outcast as everyone feels intimidated by your sheer size. This hinders your social skills, thus being shy around people. Yunjin pauses for a second, thinking if she still will pursue you. She is not a stranger to taking big cocks but your body tells you that you might have the biggest cock she will ever see.
Chaewon notices the brunette girl’s hesitation. “Can you imagine how popular you might get by taking the virginity of the biggest guy on the campus?” The short-haired girl said. She might not be able to walk properly for a few days but the fame she will have is enough for her to continue on her pursuit. “Hey, big boy~” Yunjin said to you as she sat on your lap. “Damn you got this boy!”, “don’t let us down big boy!” The basketball team cheered in excitement as one of their freshmen just got a chick for tonight.
“H-hi,” you said awkwardly as Yunjin was sitting on your right thigh. The brunette smiles as she thought it would be easy to get you tonight. “I heard a lot of things about you,” She said while holding the guy’s arms, gently feeling his muscles. You took a big gulp as this is the first time girls advance on you like this. “I heard you were strong…” she continued as her fingers ran all over the guy's arms. “I heard rumors on how strong you are!” Your teammate said. Yunjin’s friends are now in between the players.
But one girl has caught Yunjin's attention, she has long pink hair and is wearing a Spider-Man costume. One of the senior players has his arms around the girl as they are obviously flirting with each other. The girl looks familiar but she doesn’t know her name. She has seen her a few times in the hallway before, concluding that the girl is also a sophomore like her.
“Lift her up!” Your teammate shouts. “Lift her up, lift her up!” The rest of the team chant in unison. You look at Yunjin waiting for a response. She just smiles at you before whispering: “lift me up like a trophy.” The way she said it turns you on. For a brief moment, you forgot how socially awkward you are. You put your hands on her armpit as you lift Yunjin before standing up. Yunjin is surprised at how easy it is for you to lift her. She felt something… knowing that you can just toss her around like a rag doll. Pools of fantasies flash on her mind.
The team erupts with the display of your strength. The pink haired girl has been also lifted up in the air by the player she’s flirting with. Yunjin felt annoyed as she doesn’t like sharing the spotlight with another girl. Giselle doesn’t care about what’s happening around her. All she cares about is that getting lifted in the air might be the last straw. She wraps her legs around the basketball player and hugs him into a kiss.
The basketball team and the crowd pause for a moment before the crowds erupt in a roar. They are all shook by the sudden show of affection between the two. The crowd continues to cheer as Giselle has been put on top of the guy's shoulder, carrying him like a sack of potatoes. She carries Giselle upstairs to get a room of themselves.
“You should also get a room!”, “carry her as well!” Your teammate said excited for you to bag the brunette. Yunjin see’s this perfect opportunity and took it. “Yes! Let’s get to know more about each other upstairs!” She said giggling but her eyes were hinting at something else. This makes you nervous but you don't want to disappoint Yunjin. You pick her up by the waist and legs, carrying him upstairs like a princess.
“Have you done it before?” Yunjin asked as if she didn't know the answer. “D-done what before?” You know what she’s insinuating but you don’t know how to answer her. You can lie and tell that you have an experience but she may sense your inexperience or you can just tell the truth but you thought this will turn her off. “Hmm, let’s ask a different question, have you kissed a girl before?”
“Y-Yes,” you said feeling guilty. You have been kissed on the lips by your highschool classmate before. “No no, I feel jealous,” Yunjin pouts, her face looking sad. Yunjin doesn’t really care about it, she is just acting jealous to get a reaction from you. Not knowing what to do, you try to explain yourself to her. “Can you kiss me as well?” Yunjin said hoping she can start the action by making out with you.
Agreeing with her, Yunjin sits on top of you again. She puts her two arms around your neck. You can’t look her in the eye as you don’t know exactly how to kiss a girl. “It’s okay, just close your eyes, let me kiss you,” she assures you. You close your eyes waiting for her lips, she closes the distance between your lips before giving you a peck in the lips. You thought that’s it and tried to open your eyes but you felt another kiss from her. The kiss lasted longer in your lips, and you felt her tongue trying to go inside your mouth.
Her kiss becomes more passionate and now her tongue is being persistent in entering your mouth. You feel your cock twitch as it gets harder. Yunjin notices this too as she felt your buldge. She smiles as she knows that what she’s doing is working. She continues to kiss you with now holding your face, she tries to make it as passionate as she can. She’s initiating a make out session with you.
Opening your mouth, trying to kiss her back. Her tongue finally enters your mouth as it’s inviting your tongue for a torrid kissing. This is your first time having a make out session, you try to follow her rhythm as you move your tongue but Yunjin just kisses you deeper, having her tongue exploring your mouth. Your kissing has now become a sloppy one. Mouths are wetting as you’re sharing saliva, Yunjin finally pulls back to take a breath.
Yunjin heard a loud bang that came from the opposite room but she didn’t mind it. Giselle got pinned against the wall in the other room. “Let me see your cock,” the brunette said. You froze for a moment, you don’t want to but you don’t want to turn her down as well. Yunjin continues as she didn’t receive any disapproval from you. She kneels to pull your pants down to your feet. She got shine on how big it really is.
She is expecting you to have a big cock based on your height and body but your cock is more massive than expected. It has a grit as big as your forearm. Yunjin gulps in nervousness, she is in too deep now to go back. She spits on your cock multiple times before smearing it all over your cock. She’s trying to lubricate your cock to make it easy sucking it.
You moan just by her touch, your cock is being touched by a girl for the first time. Yunjin finds it cute that you’re already moaning, she strokes your cock faster to elicit more moans from you, she doesn't get disappointed. The brunette is now looking at the thick tip of your cock, thinking if she can take it. “Imagine how popular you will get,” are the words that ring on her mind before putting your cock in her mouth.
With just your tip, Yunjin's mouth is already stretched. You’re looking at her intensely, this is the first time you've had a blowjob, you don’t want to miss any details of it. The girl got motivated by your enthusiasm. She tries to lower her face, to have more of your cock. She’s halfway through your shaft but she finally gag. Your huge cock is too much for her mouth. Her cheeks are filled up by the girth of your cock. Your dick could compete with the biggest dicks on porn sites even Yunjin knows that.
She looks back at you with helplessness written on her face. She can’t take more of it. She pulls her head up to take a needed break. Tears are forming on her eyes as she coughs. The brunette looks defeated. She worries that if the campus finds out she can’t take your cock, she might lose her popular status. She gathers herself, ties her hair up and puts your cock on her mouth again.
Yunjin tries different approaches to swallow your whole cock. First, she tried to go as slow as possible, she wanted to make herself get used to the size of your cock. This doesn’t add inches on how much of your cock she can take. Second, she tried to go fast, her head bobbing faster on your cock. With this method, she forced herself to take more than just of your massive cock. This also feels good to you, her tight mouth is sucking you over and over again.
“Mhmm! WTF?!” Yunjin was surprised by your sudden release. You don’t know how to hold it yet and she’s sucking you too good. This made the girl pull away. Her mouth is full of your load, some of it drools down on her face. She thought that she should have anticipated that you will cum fast because you’re still inexperienced. Yunjin doesn’t want to spit it out, she opens her mouth to show you the amount of cum you released on her, she puts her tongue out to show more of it before finally swallowing it.
“Ha Ha, did I suck you that good? Tell everyone I give the best head!” Yunjin hysterically laughs, she might not be able to deepthroat your whole cock, she takes your orgasm as a victory. She strokes your cock again, surprised as you didn’t lose any hardness after you just released. Yunjin hands look way too small when holding your massive cock. Even when she holds it with two hands, it will only cover a half of your cock.
The brunette stands up to remove her jeans, she makes sure to turn her back against yours to give you a good view of her ass. She pulls down her underwear, bending down as she lowers it. Yunjin has a well shaped ass. You were surprised that she has a nice ass in her petite build. The girl sits on your lap again. She sits directly on top of your cock, you can feel her wet slit grinding against your cock as Yunjin tries to tease you before taking your virginity.
The girl squats up while reaching your cock, it aligns it to her slit. You already moan as your tip enters her pussy. This made her laugh for a bit, Yunjin tries to hide the fact that she’s nervous. The girl lowers herself slowly, you can feel her tight slit hugging your cock. Just by taking the tip and some of your shaft, Yunjin struggles to sit deeper as she is already stretched out. The girl doesn’t like being in a vulnerable position, she doesn’t want you to think that she’s weak because she can’t take your cock.
she lets out a war cry before carelessly sitting deep on your cock. This made the two of you moan loudly. Yunjin is stretched out more than even, she moans in pain as your massive cock is stretching her walls to the fullest. You moan loud as this is the first time you felt your cock being inside of a pussy. Her walls are tight and warm, it’s hugging your cock like it wants you to cum already. Even with her desperate attempt, Yunjin hasn't fully sat on your cock as a whole. She just just sits on it more than how deep she deepthroat you.
The brunette is contented by this, she can just make an excuse that no girl can take your cock as a whole and this is the deepest anyone can get. Yunjin is holding on your chest as she tries to pull herself up. This made the two of you moan again loudly. Yunjin feels her walls are collapsing as your massive cock is going out of her. This sensation feels too good for you. Yunjin doesn’t care anymore. She repeatedly sits on your cock. Not caring about how painful it is.
Yunjin looks determined, she looks you directly in the eyes with glimpses of hatred. She hates how massive your cock. Yunjin keeps moaning as she continues to sit on your cock. She removed the Lakers jersey as she felt her body heating up. Yunjin's boobs are in front of you. She has small but well shaped boobs that perfectly compliments her frame. She reached for your two hands to put in her boobs.
She feels your cock twitch as you hold her boobs, Yunjin smirks for a bit, even though she's struggling with your cock. She still has full control of the situation. You grab her boobs, squeezing them gently. Yunjin unlocks her bra and removes it to give you a better view of how perfect her body is. She is a confident woman, she knows that one of her strengths is her sexy petite body. She holds your fingers trying to teach you to pinch and play with her perky boobs.
The brunette who’s on top of you knows moves faster. It doesn’t hurt her as much anymore as she gets used to your girth. She tried to go deeper but her human body really has a limit. Yunjin knows find her rhythm, you are are speechless on how good this feels, paired up the sight of a orange haired chick who’s fucking herself in your cock while her boobs is on your hands.
The girl felt your cock twitching inside her. “Cum inside me, tell everyone that I have the best pussy!” Yunjin says loudly. She picks up her pace and guides your hand to her waist to help her get stabilized. Yunjin moans as this feels good now for her too. Your cock twitches more signaling you’re about to cum. Yunjin sits on your cock as deep as possible. She let out a loud moan as your massive cock stretches her slit more. Loads of your hot cum fill her slits. Yunjin feels your cock released more inside her as you cum as much as the first one.
Yunjin tiredly lay down beside you, her slit looks like a mess, her slit is still stretched wide open as loads of cum keep flowing out of her. She made it, she finally took the most massive cock in the campus. She took the biggest freshman’s virginity. Yunjin smiles while her eyes are still closed due to how tired she is. She is already basking on this achievement. Yunjin plans to lay down for a while before going back to the party downstairs. She felt that you already stand up
“Wait for me,” Yunjin said while still catching her breath. She wants everyone to know that you did it with her. She looks confused as you are now standing on the edge of the bed. The brunette’s eyes widen when you pull her close to you. Holding her legs up with your both arms. Yunjin looks horrified when you align your cock on her slit.
#le sserafim smut#k pop smut#reader smut#yunjin smut#huh yunjin smut#yunjin x reader#huh yunjin x reader#minji smut#new jeans smut#giselle smut#aespa smut
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SUIT JACKET
Aaron Hotchner x bau!reader ↳ part 2 here
Sypnosis: Aaron Hotchner seems to love his suit jacket on you. WARNING: nothing besides a few curses (I think) A/N: not my gif, ctto! This was also sitting on my drafts for almost a year and barely proofread, so I apologize for the errors.
Sunday, March 11, 2:04 AM
"Thanks, unibrow." You grinned drunkenly, smiling at your boss, SSA Aaron Hotchner, as you collapsed in the cab's backseat. His suit jacket kept you cozy and covered like a cocoon while you comfortably giggled at the applied inside joke of his new nickname.
With Penelope's constant peer pressure, your inhibition has reached rock bottom eleven shots, five cocktails, and two whiskey glasses ago. You downed liquor like water, easing your stiff shoulders.
Aaron only stared at you with the same impassive face he had and shut the door before the cold caught you. He hunched in front of the driver's window, "This woman is a federal agent, and if something happens to her, I'll hunt you down. Please, drive her home safely." He straightened back up, casually tapping the vehicle's roof.
The cab took you away only after Aaron snapped a picture of the cab's plate number. He sighed as the vehicle slowly disappeared from his line of sight. He twisted on the balls of his feet, met by his other children, agents drunkenly calling his name.
Tuesday, March 27, 10:14 AM
You scurried out of the elevator, weaving through the sea of agents in the bullpen and then to the conference room where everybody was already settled in.
"So sorry! There was this son of a b—" You closed your eyes and breathed deeply, clenching your fists. Then, you exhaled profoundly with a calm smile at the end. "I got in a car accident. Go on, Pen. Sorry for interrupting." You took a seat between Aaron and JJ.
JJ turned to you, "Are you okay?" Her hand gently landed on one of yours, giving you a worried squeeze.
You gathered a smile and raised a thumb, "Thick skull and strong bones. Nothing can break me, not even this unsub... whoa—" Your eyes widened a bit.
How ironic for your case to be about an unsub who performed a craniotomy on the victims. You smiled awkwardly, the similar tight-lipped smile that Spencer would always plaster on his face.
The other agents coughed a chuckle at your reaction while Penelope continued the debrief with the same horrified look.
Upon listening to the case details, you slowly felt colder, subtly rubbing the sides of your shoulders. You were so caught up in your anger towards the guy that rear-ended you you could've sworn your body was overheating. You left your blazer somewhere and were sure it wasn't in your wrecked car.
"Alright, wheels up in 30," Aaron announced, sending everyone to get out of their seats and grab their go bags and snapping you off your trance in the process.
You rushed to collect your file copy and headed for the door but halted when Aaron called you. You pivoted on your heels, "Yes?"
He was taking off his jacket, handing it to you as soon as it peeled off his body.
"I don't think dry cleaning your suit is part of my job description, Sir." You kidded as you stared at his black jacket.
Aaron rolled his eyes. It was so rare that you had to blink twice to ensure you didn't have a concussion from your minor car accident. "You're cold." He wasn't asking, plainly stating your slight predicament.
Your eyebrows knitted, mouth slightly opened. And as if the universe was mocking you, a sudden draft slapped you in a shiver. You snatched his jacket and mumbled a small thank you.
As you walked out of the conference room, teasing eyes bore holes into your being. Each BAU team member's narrowed brows held you captive, and their loud thoughts rang in your ears. You ignored all of it, though, taming your anxiety with the warmth of Aaron's jacket.
Wednesday, April 13, 1:37 PM
"Garcia, look for old cases with one young boy as a survivor." Aaron started, listing each task that everyone was to complete.
You were so focused on the case that your next movement caught you off guard.
Your back snapped straight from the slap of Minnesota air. It was brief. An officer merely opened and closed the door, but your body was nowhere near as warm as it was a few seconds ago.
The warmth of cotton fabric soon hugged your shoulders, along with the momentary weight of Aaron's hands, before he fully let go of his suit jacket.
He continued talking as if what he had just done was normal or anything close to casualty, "Morgan and Reid, try speaking with the victim's family one more time."
Emily exchanged looks with JJ, conversing silently while you obliviously sipped your coffee.
Friday, May 2, 5:04PM
"Capital O-M-G!" Penelope squealed, drumming on your shoulders as soon as she came close.
"Garcia, breathe," JJ gently placed her hands on Penelope's shoulders, modeling a regular breathing pattern.
Emily gave you a look as she sipped her coffee, which you returned with a shrug. Penelope was ever so eccentric. You've gotten used to it over the years you've been with the team.
"Okay, okay, okay. I'm good. Just that— I was— Ugh! Look!" Penelope shoved her phone in your face.
You saw a blinding blur, forcing out a sarcastic, "Wow! I can definitely see."
Luckily, JJ took it to herself to pull Penelope's phone away from messing up your eyesight and looked at the image plastered on the screen. A smirk immediately covered her lips, "Oh."
"What is it? Let me see—" Emily walked behind JJ. Her jaw dropped not long after. "Anything you want to tell us?" She cooed as she gave you the widest grin she had ever flashed, at least for that morning.
Your eyebrows clashed, and your forehead creased, "Whatever are you on about?"
"You're telling us nothing's happening between you and a guy?" Emily's grin only widened. You wondered how wide it could get, terrifying you in the process.
JJ flipped the phone to your end. The brightness of the screen stung your eyes a bit. "Want to explain this?"
Photo: It looked like the picture was cropped because you saw Derek's arm around you, but he was nowhere to be found in the image. Aaron's jacket was around your shoulders while he was behind you, glaring at Derek's arm.
"What about it?" The confusion was solid in your voice. However, you had a bit of an idea of what the three of them were insinuating.
Penelope stepped closer to you, "Uhuh, sure," she started as she zoomed in on the picture. "You're telling me you can't see Hotch's jacket on your shoulders, let alone Hotch glaring at my chocolate thunder?"
"He let me borrow his jacket because I was cold. Doesn't he always do that with everyone?" You innocently asked, looking at each one of them.
"Still doesn't explain him glaring at Derek." Emily chimed in a teasing tone, wiggling her eyebrows.
Your eyes widened, "You think Hotch was mad at me because I took it? He offered it to me, and I was cold. You think he was just being polite or?"
Penelope rolled her eyes and aimed her fluffy pen at you, "You oblivious profiler! He's jealous!"
"Uh-no," You chuckled.
"You don't believe me? Look at this."
Photo: This photo was older than the first one and might've been your third or fourth year with the BAU team. It seemed like all of you had just ended a case. You were snuggled on the couch on the jet. Aaron was draping his jacket over you.
"Who took that picture?" You queried.
Penelope raised her hand, "I was going to check in on everyone, then the camera spotted it, and I took a screenshot because I couldn't help myself. I was going to tease you about it but forgot for a very, very, very, very long time until I saw that picture from our last team night out." She wiggled her eyebrows, a playful smile on her lips.
"Looks like our boss has a favorite," JJ sang softly, looking at you with a knowing smile.
Emily nudged you, noticing the blush on your face. "You've gotta admit that's very sweet of Hotch. I think he likes you wearing his jacket." She teased, poking your sides.
"He does that to everyone, though," You reasoned. If you recall, he had offered his jacket to many people before.
"Nope, no!" Penelope shook her head vigorously with a tight lip. "He offers it to some but gives it to you."
"We had a case where it was biting cold outside. Hotch offered to help me if I needed a jacket. I said no because of politeness and shit, but he didn't insist. He didn't even offer his jacket. He offered to give me time to return to my room and grab my jacket." Emily grimaced, obviously still holding a grudge regarding the incident.
"I've known Hotch for years. Giving out his jacket was only for emergencies. If it's the only choice he had. We've had cases where a victim was a little too exposed, and his solution was to wrap them with the newspaper he conveniently found." JJ exclaimed, sorting the manila folders on her chest.
You gave it some thought and considered every possibility, but you shook your head. "He's just being nice because he's my boss. Plus, I'm still a bit tense around the team." You straightened yourself, fixing your top.
Emily cackled, "Getting flat-out drunk with us is definitely you still a bit tense around us."
"You know what I mean," You defended, blushing.
The three exchanged looks and shrugged. If you wanted to turn a blind eye, then it was your choice. But they had a perfect theory and tried to test it out.
Aaron was heading to the elevator as you exited the bullpen. The three of them grinned.
"Going for girls night?" Aaron quipped, raising his eyebrows.
JJ frowned, "We were, but she's feeling sick. I think the cold's getting to her." She gave you a pitiful hug.
Your eyes blew wide, jerking your head behind you where the other two stood with maniac grins. You knew what JJ was doing. It didn't take a second for you to figure it out. And as if luck was on their side, the elevator dinged.
You followed their figures as they piled in in the lift. You glared at them, but Emily focused on the man beside you.
You gazed at Aaron and were met with his jacket stretched out to you. Your mouth fell open, unable to breathe.
"It's cold outside this time of night. You'll feel worse if you don't layer up." Aaron cleared his throat, "Take it."
You reached for his jacket so slowly that he took it in himself to wrap it around your shoulders. "Thank you," Your voice quivered, hesitantly stepping inside the elevator.
He followed, standing beside you. You could feel the three devils behind you, preparing yourself for their constant teasing.
Unbeknownst to any of you, Aaron was holding his breath in the hopes that none of you would notice his blushing ears.
Monday, May 16, 8:12PM
The entire day has been a drag. Besides the unsub being disgustingly great at hiding his tracks in the safety of your local area, your stomach had been giving you the worst time of your life.
Later in the evening, in Aaron's orders, everyone was sent home to get some rest and start fresh the next day.
You were thankful. You needed to rest from all the stomach-emptying vomit you did in the restroom. Your acid reflux was having a field day and didn't let you get a breath. You practically lived in the toilet. You even had to call Derek and ask him to put you on speaker so you could contribute to finding the unsub. Luckily, they didn't question it.
Emily retracted away as she exited your hug, "Are you sure you don't want me to give you a ride home? We practically live in this building. I don't think they'd mind you leaving your car here for a night."
A warm smile brightened your drained face, "Yes, I'm sure. Thanks for the offer." You bid her one last goodbye before heading to your own car.
Your head was down as the day's exhaustion finally caught up. Your senses were off. You walked as if time stopped. You wondered if you should've taken advantage of Emily's offer.
With your loud thoughts and vulnerable senses, a heart attack almost killed you when a sudden cage of warmth engulfed your body. For a moment, your body wanted to fight, but it didn't take long for you to remember the familiarity of this warmth.
"What took you so long?" His voice was gentle and comforting enough to put you to sleep immediately.
You looked up at Aaron, who refused to unwrap his arms around you, "I didn't know you were waiting. I thought you went home already. Isn't Jack waiting for you? It's movie night."
Aaron smiled, "I'm taking you to the hospital to get checked. Captain Jack's orders."
You couldn't help but smile as well. He held the door for the passenger seat before jumping to the driver's seat. As you watched him go around, you noticed his scent lingered on your shoulders.
Aaron placed his jacket on yours.
"You ought to be careful," A chuckle passed your lips, "The gals are onto you."
"Why?" Aaron looked at you with a confused expression. His face made you giggle. The genuineness of his expression made you wonder his reaction if you had said the same thing two years ago.
A grin glistened on your face, "They say Agent Hotchner has a crush on me." Your voice danced with playfulness.
Aaron copied your grin and shrugged, "I'm surprised they haven't figured it out after all these years." He turned his body to face you, "So? Do you like him back?"
If only the BAU team knew how their unit chief, the SSA Aaron Hotchner, was a lot friskier than they perceived him to be, Aaron wouldn't last a day from all the teasing.
Then you wondered how the BAU team would react if they found out you and Aaron have been dating for the past two years and successfully kept it a secret from everyone except Strauss and Rossi.
Or the number of questions you'd be bombarded with when they learn that you recently moved in together with Aaron and Jack. You knew well enough that the ladies would be interrogating you like a serial killer.
You shrugged, "I heard he's got a fiancée." You fished the necklace well hidden under your shirt. A golden ring band shaped like vines with an oval-cut blue moon diamond dangled on the chain.
"Yeah..." Aaron held your hand and placed a soft kiss on the back of it, "You wouldn't want to be in the way of that." He smiled widely, an ever-loving expression you indulged yourself with for the past two years and soon... for a lifetime.
#aaron hotchner#aaron hotch fic#aaron hotch x reader#aaron hotch fanfiction#aaron hotch x you#criminal minds#criminalminds#aaron hotch hotchner#aaron hotch imagine#cm#ssa aaron hotchner#ssa hotchner#fem!reader#x reader#x female reader#character x reader#hotch#aaron hotch fluff
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Not a driver - Lando
Summary: Y/n asked Lando to try the sim out of boredom and well- let’s say it did not go as expected
Warning: SMUT, dom-ish!Lando, bratty!reader, cockwarming, toys, overstimulation, pet names (princess or sum), fingering, f!receiving, handcuffs (i think that’s it lemme know if i missed any)
Side note: This is my first fic ever so please be gentle🥺🫶🏻. English is also not my first language so sorry if anything sounds weird. Hopes you guys enjoy
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Y/n settled in her place in the sim rig and started driving with Lando standing next to her watching. Well, for the record, despite her boyfriend driving for a living, y/n is a terrible driver. However, Lando doesn’t mind it at all, he is more than happy to take the wheel. Therefore, he is surprised when y/n asks him to try the sim.
“Fuck” she yells out of frustration, hitting the steering wheel after spinning out, again. While her beloved boyfriend laughs out loud.
“Why are you laughing” Y/n pouts, and turns around to look at Lando, who was standing behind her sim rig with arms around her neck. “I’m not” he smirks, leaning down to peck her lips.
After multiple attempts of trying to finish a lap and failed. “I give up” Y/n sighs “This is too hard, I hate driving”.
“Oh come on, lemme show you”. Lando guides y/n to stand up and take her seat. She was fully prepared to stand by and watch him when suddenly he took her hands.
“Come here baby” He pulled her onto his lap. Her back against his chest, he guides her hands on the wheel. Lando’s feet on the pedal while hers was dangling, since she was a lot shorter than him.
Y/n was wearing one of Lando’s oversized t-shirts with her panties underneath to deal with the torturous heat of summer in Monaco. She squirms in Lando’s lap trying to get comfortable, when Lando reaches out to stop her as she whines out quietly, but enough for him to hear.
“Ready?” Lando asks, placing his hands over hers, which were already on the steering wheel. His hands are significantly larger than hers, so it’s fair to say that her hand vanished from sight.
After a few laps of not crashing, thanks to her boyfriend, y/n attention starts to drift to her boyfriend’s hands. The way his hands look so much bigger than yours, the way the veins run through his hands or the ring he was wearing made her go feral. Y/n can’t help but squirm slightly against him to seek a release. However, Lando ignores her movements and keeps his eyes stuck to the screen.
Y/n tried to shift her attention back to driving, but the way her boyfriend kept squeezing her hands and placing kisses on her temple every once in a while drove her crazy. But it’s not until Lando shifts in his seat and practically thrusts onto her that y/n has her last straw.
“Landooo” Y/n whines as she removes her hands from the steering wheel to turn around and straddle him.
“What’s wrong princess? I thought you wanted to try the sim” He answered in a teasing tone and chuckled slightly at her action.
Y/n didn’t reply but let out a loud whine and groan as she nuzzled her face into Lando’s neck. Desperately grinding on his bulge, feeling it getting harder and harder. Lando’s hand let go of the steering wheel to steady her hip, stopping her from moving.
“Princess, look at me” He demands with a low-toned voice, the one that she always goes crazy for.
Lando’s one hand holding her face, moving it away from the crook of his neck, the other one found its way to her butt and kneading it. Y/n’s eyes lazily look into his while still laying her head on his shoulder with a pout on her face.
“What do you want, hmm?”
“You know what I want” Y/n whines out, hiding her flushed cheek into his neck, again.
“No, look at me sweetie, use your words” He pulled out that harsh, low-toned voice again.
“Need you, Lan” She looked at him with those puppy eyes, knowing for sure he wouldn’t be able to say no to her. Y/n squirms, grinding her clothed pussy against his now more visible hard bulge.
“How bad?” he teases. Y/n groans, hitting his chest with her palm. “Patient” he demands
“Take these off” Hands pulled her pantie lace and let it snap against her skin
Y/n shuffles in his lap to take it off and place it in Lando’s hand, then he shoves it in his pocket. She struggles to unlock his belt but manages to do it anyway, then rushes to unzip his pants and pull down his boxer. All the while Lando just leaned back onto the seat and watched her struggle and let out a chuckle seeing how impatient his girlfriend was.
“Lando-“ she gasps sinking into him slowly, afraid to get hurt since he’s really big compared to her. When suddenly he pulled her down onto him roughly, making tears well up in her eyes from the sudden stretch.
After a little while of getting used to his size, y/n starts bouncing onto him, or did she think so? Lando suddenly holds her down, stopping her movements. Y/n lets out a whine and stares at him in confusion.
“Now, you’re going to be a good girl and keep me warm while I do some laps” he stops mid-sentence to look down at her, who looks like she’s about to cry out from frustration. “Is that ok princess? Can you do that for me”.
Y/n nodded slightly. As much as y/n wants to say no, she knows that if she just behaves for him, the rewards she gets after this torture ends will be worth it.
“Yeah? That’s my good girl”
After about 10-20 minutes of torment and Lando has no sign of shutting down the sim to take care of her, y/n begins to get impatient and starts squirming, clenching harder to ask for her boyfriend’s attention. Lando hisses but pays no attention to his now very, very needy girlfriend. Not getting what she wants, y/n starts grinding down harder and eventually starts bouncing on him.
“Behave,” Lando says, still very much not giving her the attention she wanted.
Still, y/n ignores him and bounces even faster. Not holding back anymore decided to get herself off. Lando, suprisingly, doesn’t stop her and Y/n takes this as approval. Y/n keeps chasing her high as her boyfriend does nothing but lean back, hands folded behind his head with a smirk on his face, staring at Y/n’s face as she comes close to her orgasm.
Just when she was about to cum, Lando stopped her. Out of confusion and frustration, Y/n whines out loud, frowning at her boyfriend, while he’s grinning.
“Didn’t say you could get yourself off, did I?” he questions in a teasing tone.
“But-“ A tear rolls down from her eyes from being denied her orgasm.
“Brat,” Lando said as he reached out to wipe her tears away.
He stood up suddenly and Y/n squealed, wrapping her arms around his neck, afraid of falling. Lando carries her to their bedroom and throws her gently on the bed.
“What am I gonna do with this brat hm?”
“Please Lan, I’ll be good, I promise” Y/n begs, hoping her boyfriend would give in
“Oh? Then why did you get yourself off without my permission hm, brat?” he questions, as he reaches out to the drawer in the nightstand and pulls out a handcuff and a vibrator. Lando cuffs y/n onto their bed’s headboard while she tries to wriggle. “Stop or you’ll hurt yourself,” Lando said sternly, y/n pouting in return.
Lando has been teasing Y/n with the vibrator for more than an hour, edging her through multiple orgasms that now both of them lost count of.
“I can’t take it anymore” She lets out a shaky breath as her body trembles, tears staining her flushed face. Tries to close her legs but fails, again, with her boyfriend settling between them. Lando moves the vibrator onto her puffy clit from being overstimulated, while his fingers thrust in and out of her at a pace that she feels like she can pass out at every given moment. The wet sounds of her arousal being slapped against her skin over and over made Y/n blush as she hid her face in the pillow.
“Don’t be shy now princess, I thought you wanted to cum”. He said with a smirk on his face that she wanted to wipe off so badly.
“Just one more, ok? Can you do that for me baby?” he asks knowing that he’s gonna pull one out of her regardless of what her answer will be. Y/n has no choice but to nod, and that’s not the first time he promised that her next orgasm is going to be “the last one”.
As he feels her pussy clenching harder around his fingers, Lando moves faster and turns the vibrator to its highest setting, helping his girlfriend to chase her orgasm. Finally, y/n spasms down onto his fingers and squeezes her eyes shut as she cries out loud. Lando doesn’t stop thrusting and helps her ride out of her orgasm.
“No more” Y/n shakes her head as she whimpers, tears rolling down all over her face.
“I know sweetheart, I know” Lando whispers as he removes his fingers from her, peppering kisses all over her face. Moved to uncuff her wrist and place kisses onto both of her red wrists from her wriggling from before. Y/n’s hands immediately move to wrap around his neck, pulling him down to cuddle with her.
Y/n drifts to sleep after just a little while of cuddling from the tiredness from all the overstimulation before. Lando moves away from her grips and replaces himself with a pillow gently since the last thing he wants would be to wake her up.
He grabs a warm towel to clean her up, parting Y/n’s legs gently and cleaning her up. Y/n let out a whine when the cloth touched her sensitive clit as Lando shushes her. “Go back to sleep, baby”
Lando quickly throws the towel away and settles on the bed beside y/n. They cuddled up and y/n nuzzled in Lando’s chest.
“You didn’t get to cum” Y/n mumbled in a low volume but enough for Lando to hear.
“Go to sleep princess, we’ll deal with that tomorrow”
#lando norris#smut#f1 x reader#f1 imagine#f1 fic#f1 smut#lando x reader#lando smut#lando norizz#f1 x you#fanfic#lando imagine#lando x you#ln4#ln4 x reader#ln4 imagine#ln4 fic#ln4 x y/n
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please can you write niki with a noona gf !! and he tries his hardest to impress her and let her see him as a big boy now ^.^
fluff or suggestive, i dont mind ❤️❤️ thankss
──⯎ ˙ 💋 ̟ noona!
엔하이픈 | Enhypen | Nishimura Riki
──Pairing: bf!niki x afab!reader
──Genre: fluff, angst
──Synopsis: Poor Niki despises being treated like a baby by his girlfriend who is only slightly older than him. He decides to try to prove to her that hes not a baby
──Warnings: cursing, established relationship, kissing, making out, skinship, hickeys
──A/N: guys im working on making a taglist so if u wanna be added pls message me or comment or sum so ik to add you
masterlist
"Hi baby. How was your day?" you ask your boyfriend, reaching up to cup his cheeks as you kiss his forehead. Niki's smile faded slightly upon hearing your name for him. Truthfully, calling him baby made him feel like a baby. Babe was fine but calling him baby just seemed to upset him. Sometimes you would take it a step further just to make him more upset by calling him 'baby boy' which was so much worse.
"It was uh... fine I guess." He shrugged, clenching his teeth slightly when you ran your fingers through his dark hair. You were already treating him like a fragile being as soon as he had gotten home. This severely pissed him off. Not to the extent that he would get mad at you though. He had never yelled at you or anything like that. Usually when he was mad he would just walk away and sulk.
"You seem a little out of it. Did something happen?" you asked genuinely, sticking your bottom lip out to form a small pout.
"Just tired." Niki mummbled briefly, not stopping to look at you. He slipped out of your embrace and made his way to sit on the couch. You followed him to the living room of your shared apartment. His expression and demeanor told you to fuck off but sometimes you didn't know when to stop. You took a seat next to him so you could continue to run your fingers through his dark locks. He groaned in annoyance, jerking his head away from you.
"Yah, why are you so cranky? Got a stick up your ass or sum'?" You huffed, crossing your arms over your chest with a scowl.
Niki really did like when you played with his hair. Though, right now he had to resist it. He had to get you to realize he didn't want to be treated like a little baby. He wanted to be treated like an adult. He wanted you to think of him as your super hot boyfriend instead of your baby boy. It was no easy task trying to look all tough in front of you when you were so sweet to Niki.
In a sudden swift move, Niki stood from the couch and turned to go to his room. You reached a hand out to attempt to stop him but it was pointless. He had already made up his mind to leave. There was no stopping him once his mind was made.
"Yah! Where do you think you're going?" you yelled to him, hoping he would stop and come back. Though you knew he wouldn't.
Your boyfriend stopped with a heavy sigh. He turned around to face you. "I don't want to be treated like a baby by you."
"But Ki, you're myyyyyy baby~" you coo, clearly not making the situation any better as Niki shuts the door to his bedroom. You hear a small click and you know he's locked the door too. You throw your head back in frustration eliciting a long sigh.
After a while you start to worry that your boyfriend is genuinely mad. 20 had passed by and he has yet to leave his room. Neither have you heard any noise from his room. You grumble as you push yourself off the couch and trudge over to his bedroom door. Knocking softly, you press an ear to the door. When you hear nothing on the other side, you decide to knock again. This time you hear shuffling which you assume is Niki getting up from his bed. But instead of him opening the door, you hear his gaming chair squeak.
"Come on. You know I don't actually think you're a baby, Riki." You groan, sitting down against his door. You cross your arms over your chest. "Please come back out."
Nothing but silence is heard from his room. You know damn well that he's not actually playing games and ignoring you. When he's mad, he'll pretend to be busy but he'll really just sit there trying to resist coming out of his room to kiss you.
"Say that you won't treat me like a baby anymore." you can tell by the sound of his voice that he's pouting. It makes you giggle.
"Is that all its going to take to get you to come out of your room?"
"You have to promise!" He yells back. You begin to feel bad. You can tell that he's serious that he doesn't want to be treated like a baby. He's so cute and pretty though that sometimes you can't help it. Sometimes you have to give things up for the greater good. And in this case, your boyfriend wasn't coming back out unless you gave up the baby-talk and pampering.
"Alright, Niki, I promise. I'll stop treating you like a baby." Upon hearing your promise, the door opens slightly. You look up to see your pretty boyfriend. He looks down at your sitting figure with a slight pout. Still so cute.
"Hi pretty boy." You stand from your spot on the floor. Niki opens the door wider and stands to the side, signaling for you to come in. You do just that. You step into his room which was dark from the lights being off and the windows being covered by the curtains.
Once you're fully inside the room, the door shuts behind you. Niki's hands find their way to your hips and he pushes you until your back hits the door. Heat rises to your cheeks when you realize why he's acting this way. He really does want to be treated like an adult.
He brought a hand up to cup your cheek before crashing his lips onto yours. You give a muffled gasp at his sudden action. Your hands quickly found the back of his neck, pulling him impossibly closer. Your lips seemed to mold together perfectly as if the two of you were made for each other. It may seem like he's being unnecessarily rough in him movements but his kisses are gentle as his thumb rubs circles on your cheek. Your heart flutters at the softness of his touch. You know that he could never bring himself to be rough with you.
Though, he still didn't seem satisfied. The hand that was once on your waist had snaked to the small of your back. He pulled you toward him until your bodies were flush against each other. His lips moved down to kiss your neck, setting warmth to every part of your skin he touches. Your fingers played with his hair while he bit the soft skin of your neck then soothed the mark with his tongue. Unbeknownst to you, he was melting under your touch even more than you, feeling you play with his hair. Of course he was whipped for you. He continued to leave marks on your neck and shoulders until he was satisfied with his work. He pulled away to look at you like you were like his own personal canvas.
"Ki, I-"
"I told you not to treat me like a baby." He deadpanned with a cold harsh glare as his fingers held your chin. His face moved close to yours, his lips hovering next to your ear. His voice caused a chill to run down your spine. "I'm not going to let that happen again, yeah?"
His fingers slid down to wrap around your throat, squeezing gently. You gasped slightly at his change in attitude. He had never once acted this way. Every new action was a surprise to you. His lips found themselves back on yours like a magnet. The pressure on your throat made your head spin. Niki could tell he was getting the reaction he wanted. It made his mind fuzzy seeing you like this.
Niki removed his lips from yours which were now swollen and red. He released his grip on your throat and brought a finger up to swipe your bottom lip. He chucked watching you gasp for air.
"Am I still a baby to you?" he asked, causing you to shake your head frantically. As cute as he was, you had to admit, he was so ungodly hot too. And, god, was that hot. "Good." Niki turned and walked away from you, leaving you confused.
"Niki, what was that-"
"Go away, I'm embarrassed." he whined, plopping onto the bed and throwing a blanket over himself and hiding his face. You burst out in a fit of laughter. He really was too adorable. "Shut up!" He sat up wielding a pillow which he threw full force at you, sending you landing on your ass. You sat on the floor laughing at how cute your boyfriend was.
© strawberrynull, 2024. Do not copy my work. Please DM for permission before translating or reuploading. Thank You
#enhypen#enha#kpop#enhypen fluff#enhypen x reader#enhypen imagines#enhypen angst#enhablr#enha angst#enha fluff#enha imagines#enha x reader#niki enhypen#enhypen niki#niki#niki fluff#niki imagines#niki x reader#niki angst#nishimura riki#strawberrynull
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i want nobody but you | p.sh
synopsis → you and sunghoon have known each other your whole lives and although you've both dealt with jokes from classmates since elementary school on how you two would end up together, that never ended up happening; you two would brush it off and then move on. you never really thought about pursuing something with him romantically, especially since you like things with a more casual approach. but once sunghoon's girlfriend becomes a part of the picture, you can't help but feel these feelings consume you. being the way you are, however, you managed to push them down and you at least thought you got over them until you realize maybe they never left at all. or even worse: they were always there.
feat. → yujin (ive) & sungchan (riize)
genre → college au, friends to somewhat enemies to lovers, romance, smut, angst (eh, ig), slowburn (ig? srry lmao)
pairing → nonidol!sunghoon x fem!reader
warnings → MDNI, smoking !! (reader and sunghoon both smoke), drinking, cursing, mention(s?) of death, mention of hookups, reader is called and referred to (sometimes self referred to) as a: slut/whore; slutshaming, !! potential sh reference (pinching/hitting self; dk if that counts, but it's not mentioned after) !!, mentions of sex (obvi)
w.c. → 22.7k
a/n → long time no see lol. lmk if u would be interested in seeing some pics i took at the enha concert i went to :)) (i won't do vids because i was screaming like a baboon lmao) p.s. bear w me bc ik this is a long one, but i feel like i owe you all since i've been gone for practically a century, but pls give it a chance, i'm on my knees begging bc this took 3 days
disclaimer !! → i don’t ship any idols i portray as dating in this story irl nor do i have the intent to portray anyone in this story in a negative light, this is just for creative purposes, babes <3; this is all just fiction, take it lightly pls and thx
!!DO NOT COPY OR REPOST!!
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Today has been a long day. You groan as you take a seat on a bench somewhere near the lecture hall you just left and you close your eyes as you lean back against it. You had originally thought your senior year of high school was torturous, but being a senior in college was far worse. Your eyebrows furrow a bit when you feel the weight of the bench shift a bit, meaning someone has taken a seat beside you. Your eyes open a bit and you turn your head to see Sunghoon next to you. A sigh escapes your lips and you turn your head away, closing your eyes again.
Sunghoon sits there for a moment, looking at you. Lately, you two haven’t hung out as much and although he admittedly forgot to text you for the past week and half, you were still his best friend. He could argue, though, that “the phone works both ways”, so you’re not exactly innocent either. He’s seen you around campus, hanging out with some members of the basketball team, mainly the captain: Sungchan. You didn’t seem bothered by the lack of contact between the two of you, either, so it didn’t bother him or make him feel guilty that you haven’t hung out in just a few days. No…not at all.
“Nice to see you, too.” he mumbles. You stay quiet, honestly close to falling asleep on the bench, especially with the warm breeze that is gently blowing. He narrows his eyes a bit and leans back against the bench. He does the same as you, closing his eyes as he relaxes, but he frowns to himself. “You and Sungchan seem to be close.” he says, not really even understanding why he brought it up in the first place.
This piques your interest. “What about him.” you say rather than ask, still keeping your eyes closed.
Sunghoon shrugs, still not really sure why he cares who you hang out with or how often or who they are or…anything like that. Maybe it upsets him to think about the fact that you might replace him with someone cooler as your best friend; maybe he was too lame for you. How juvenile, he thought to himself. But that’s what it felt like, to him, at least. “Nothing. I’ve just seen you guys hanging out a lot, that’s all.” Sunghoon replies.
“How would you know that; we haven’t really hung out or talked lately.” you reply, not meaning to sound snarky, but it most likely came across that way.
Sunghoon scoffs softly. “I have eyes; I can still see who you talk to.”
You open your eyes a bit and turn your head to look at him. “Stalker.” you tease.
Sunghoon opens his eyes, almost as if he can feel you looking at him and he rolls them, not amused. “Am not…I’m just trying to start a conversation or whatever.”
“About the people I talk to?”
Sunghoon shrugs. “About anything…” It stays quiet for a moment. “It’s just been a while since we’ve talked.”
“And whose fault is that?” You ask, rhetorically.
Sunghoon frowns. “Well, I’ve just been busy-”
You scoff, “Yeah. I know.” You reply dryly.
“What is that supposed to mean?”
“Nothing. Just that that’s what you always say whenever we don’t talk to each other for a while. Like, I get it, you’re dating Yujin, big whoop.”
You’ve considered the possibility that he has just been busy with schoolwork, but no matter how many times you would give him the benefit of the doubt, it always ended up being because he was hanging out with Yujin. You weren’t really mad, per say, just annoyed. Severely annoyed. But what could you do? Ever since they started dating freshman year, you’ve felt like you were on the backburner. Which, again, you can’t really be upset about that. Afterall, she’s his girlfriend, whether you liked it or not. There is nothing wrong with her, you two got along fine, even if you don’t really talk or are even friends. You don’t hate her, not for any valid reasons, anyway. Still, despite how many people you know, Sunghoon is your only real friend and always has been. But it’s times like these when it feels like he means more to you than you mean to him.
“She’s my girlfriend.” He says, matter-of-factly.
You roll your eyes at his statement. “I know that,” you retort with annoyance, “you only ever bring it up every chance you get.”
“You seriously can’t be annoyed that I spend time with my own girlfriend.” He responds with the same tone.
Sometimes, Sunghoon gets caught up in things. Like being with Yujin, for example. He’ll be with her and then it just slips his mind to respond to a text of yours or to ask if you want to do something, he can’t help it. He knows that he’s your best friend and he’s certain that you’re his, too. Sure, Yujin means a lot to him, but you mean more, whether he would admit that or not. He just wants to make everything balanced, for everything to work out. But a part of him feels like something has been off since he started dating Yujin. Sure, he’s had other girlfriends, but never one for longer than a few months. This relationship is important to him. What if Yujin is the one? He can’t screw it up and he’s afraid to, so he makes sure to spend as much time with her as he can. He thought you would understand, but apparently not.
You’ve met Sunghoon’s other girlfriends, none of which bothered you as much as Yujin. Maybe because this one seems more serious. Maybe because she seems more important to him. The thought makes your stomach curdle. This whole situation makes your stomach curdle. You shouldn’t care so much, but you do. You hate that. “Whatever.” you reply, honestly not having thought of anything better to respond with. What were you supposed to say to that? Of course you understood, but that doesn’t mean it doesn’t suck.
“Besides, like I said, you and Sungchan have been hanging out a lot recently. Don’t act like you’ve never blown me off to hang out with him.” Sunghoon says.
“Barely.”
“Not barely. A lot. ‘Oh, Sungchan invited me to his basketball game to watch’, ‘Oh, Sungchan invited me to a party,’ ‘Oh, Sungchan wants to hook up’, ‘Oh, Sungchan this and Sungchan that’.” Sunghoon mocks, annoyed.
You frown. “Why do you care? You’ve got a girlfriend, so just hang out with her instead.”
Sunghoon frowns as well. “That’s not the point. The point is that you ditch me just the same to hang out with a guy who you’re not even dating. You don’t talk to me sometimes when you’re with him or another guy, so why are you so upset that I do the same with Yujin, who I’m actually dating?”
“Stop rubbing in the fact that you’re dating someone. Good for you, who gives a shit? So what if I do the same? It’s only because you do it first!” you argue back. You grab your backpack and stand up as you put it on. You start walking away from him and he watches you as you leave.
“Great talk!” he calls out to you in a sarcastic manner.
He didn’t mean to make you upset or try to “rub his relationship” in your face, he would never try to intentionally make you upset. So, why did he care? He doesn’t, it’s as simple as that. Maybe you doing the same thing to him with Sungchan bothered him a little. Maybe you wanting to spend your time instead with someone else you’re not even dating bothered him a little. But it’s not like he actually cared or anything. He knows he can’t tell you what to do or who to see, so why does he care? He knows he blew you off, so why didn’t he just apologize? Why did he bring up Sungchan in the first place? Sunghoon sits on the bench for a moment, rethinking things. Why was he acting like you were ignoring him when it was kind of the other way around? He sighs and closes his eyes again. He’ll figure it out later.
-
You let out a long yawn as the dim glow from your computer screen shines on your face. It’s three in the morning, and sure, you have a class tomorrow, but you can’t sleep and figure you can just skip your lecture anyway. Even if your brightness was all the way down, it still hurt your eyes every so often, so you would close them to make them feel better while you listened to the show you were watching. You hear your phone ding and your eyes open, your hand reaching for your phone to see the text.
“are you awake?” Sunghoon texts.
He knows you are. You almost always are, which is why he knew you would see the message. Although, he did anticipate the idea of you ignoring him. You were good at things like that, things that required a stubborn attitude. He didn’t mind your stubbornness, though. He didn’t mind anything when it came to you. He waited a bit, sitting in the darkness with just the light of his phone screen, his thumb gently tapping it so it doesn’t automatically turn off as he waits for you to text back.
“yeah.” you text back.
It took you a few minutes and in all honesty, you almost didn’t respond. But you missed him, which even if he asks directly, you would deny. You wonder if he missed you too, but you shake that thought away.
“still pissy?”
This makes you laugh a little. Yes, you were, but you still found it a little funny.
“shut up.” you text back.
“wanna hang out?”
You sigh. Now he wants to? It takes you a while to reply with anything as you just stare at his message.
“can u bring the usual?” you reply.
He smiles at your text. “duh” he texts back.
You smile a bit, looking forward to actually hanging out with him. The whole argument was dumb anyway and you just wanted your best friend back. And after a while of waiting, you hear a knock on your dorm room door. You get up from your bed and unlock it, opening it as you step outside. He smiles softly when he sees you and you smile a bit back. You both quietly leave your dorm building before going outside and sitting on the curb. He sets the plastic bag he was carrying between you two and opens a bottle of beer before handing it to you. You take it and he opens his own, both of you taking a sip as a cool breeze blows softly.
“Sorry about earlier,” he says quietly, “and for not talking to you for a week. I just got caught up with Yujin, you know?”
You take another drink, not really interested in discussing this anymore. “It’s fine.”
“I also wasn’t trying to rub her and I into your face and make you feel bad or anything, it’s just…” he trails off. It’s silent for a moment as you both drink. “This week has been shitty.” he mumbles.
“Amen to that.” you reply. He chuckles softly and you both clink your bottles before smiling and taking another drink.
“How’s your love life going, anyway?” he asks, genuinely curious.
Sure, there were other things he wanted to talk about, could talk about, but this is what slipped out of his mouth first. He was actually curious, he truly wants to know. He just wants to see you happy.
You shrug, “The same; just hook ups.”
He looks at you for a moment. That’s it? You’ve been hooking up with people since the beginning of high school. Sure, you’ve dated some guys before, but they were all assholes; Sunghoon never liked them. He couldn’t stand them, to put it plainly. You deserve better, and he knows that. But he also knows you’re not into relationships. You like things to be simple and direct. But when it comes to how you feel, he knew you weren’t very expressive with that. Only when it comes to getting what you want. He kind of admires that about you.
“So…no one in particular? You just kind of…go after who you think is the hottest?”
You grin, “Something like that.” you take a sip, “So…how are things going with Yujin?”
You honestly hate that you asked. Why would you? Why would you want to hear about that? Surely, things must be going wonderfully if he’s so wrapped up in all that is her. But you’re still friends. It’s normal to ask these kinds of questions, right? Maybe he won’t really say much anyway and you’ll be a good friend for even asking. That’s what you’re hoping for, at least.
"Well... things have been kind of weird. She's been acting kinda distant recently; I don't know how else to explain it. She just seems really bored all the time. Like, the sex is good but it just seems like she's not into me anymore or something." he replies.
You give him a weird look as he brings up the topic of sex with Yujin. Gross. Just...Gross.
“Describing sex with your ‘girlfriend’ as good is never a good thing.” you say as you laugh a bit, taking a sip.
Sunghoon scoffs a bit. Why did it seem like you were happy to hear that? It irritated him a bit, but he brushed it off. “Well, I didn’t mean it like that. It’s more like…it’s become something that’s routine.”
“Yeah, that’s probably not a good sign.”
Sunghoon sighs. "I know... it's just so weird though. I mean, we've been together for so long, and she's never been the type to get bored like this. It just sucks. I'm worried if something happened between us that's making her not want to be with me anymore."
You look at him for a moment as he drinks. You hate seeing him upset and you know that Yujin means a lot to him, especially since this is his first big relationship. You frown a bit as you drink. “Have you asked her?” you take another sip, “Aren’t people in relationships supposed to communicate and shit?”
"Yeah, I asked her and she said everything was fine, but like... I don't know. I just have a feeling that she's not telling me something, and I've tried asking her multiple times, but every time, she always says everything's fine." he takes another drink. “That’s pretty much what I’ve been spending last week doing, just…trying to fix what may not even be broken.” he mumbles.
You feel bad now for getting upset at him for blowing you off. It makes sense and you just got defensive again, not really knowing what he was doing. You sit there for a moment, not really sure what to say. Sunghoon didn’t mind the silence, though. He was trying to focus on Yujin and figure out why things feel this way when maybe, they aren’t even that way at all. Maybe it’s him. He isn’t sure, but he is sure that he already feels a million times better being with you, even if it is just sitting next to each other on a curb in silence.
“Do you cum?” you ask.
Sunghoon chokes on his beer a little, hitting his chest a bit as he coughs. He looks at you, not expecting your question at all, and as for you, well, you weren’t really expecting to ask it. It kind of just…came out. Your initial thought process was to ask more about his feelings on things in the relationship, seeming more like a routine, but it kind of led to you wondering if he even cums. In your defense, you thought that if he doesn’t, then maybe the relationship is going downhill. You look at him, as if what you asked was totally normal, taking another sip of your beer. He looks back at you, seeming to have processed what you asked.
“...yeah, pretty much every time.”
“Does she?”
Again, not something you really want to know, but you do want to help him.
“...sometimes, but most of the time she doesn’t.”
You suck air through your teeth, “Uh-oh.”
“It’s not a big deal, you know, so what if sometimes we don’t? It’s not about that, it’s just about…connecting or whatever.” he mumbles as he takes a sip.
“So, then what? Do you guys just like…do it yourself?”
“Yeah, so?”
You laugh. You can’t help it, it’s just too funny. Not his obvious pain with his relationship kind of going south, but the fact that he finds this to be normal. You at least found that funny.
“What’s so funny?” he asks, pissed off, but also slightly embarrassed.
“Dude, I'm not a relationship expert, but like...shouldn't people who have sex, I don't know, finish every time? I mean, I have never really had that happen often with any of the guys I hook up with, but hey, what do I know.”
"Well... I guess, but it's not a big deal to me. As long as she enjoys it, that's what's important. And, it's not like it happens all the time. Sometimes she does finish, but it's just... well, not as often as I would hope..." he takes another sip.
You roll your eyes to yourself. Kind of out of instinct. If you’re going to be frank, you don’t give a damn about her.
You shrug, “I don’t know,” you take another sip, “you say you don’t cum sometimes, how come?”
“I don’t know…it just happens?”
You shake your head, “Nah, there’s a reason.”
“But the reason is dumb and I don’t want to talk about this anymore.” he takes another sip.
“Do you think she’s hot?”
What a stupid question. You wish you didn’t ask it. Why would you want to hear him talk about yet again how hot he thinks she is. It makes your blood boil and you would rather bash yourself over the head with your beer bottle than hear him talk about how perfect she is. But, there is a small, small part of you hoping for a certain answer. Only a small part.
“Of course I do.” he replies, simply.
“So, then, what’s the problem?”
“Sometimes I have a hard time finishing, happy? Jesus…” he mumbles as he drinks some more.
You roll your eyes. You’ve known each other your whole lives, you know when he’s lying.
“Mmm,” you take another sip, “no, you see, sometimes when I hook up with guys, I suddenly don't feel attracted to them, so then sometimes I don't finish. So do you just like sometimes not like her or something?”
He shakes his head, "No, I'm always attracted to her. But... sometimes I have a hard time finishing, and I don't know why that is."
“What do you think about?” you ask, kind of quietly.
A part of you didn’t want to ask that, besides, this conversation was becoming weird. But that small, small part of you was so desperately hoping for a certain answer. Fucked up? Yeah, most definitely, but that didn’t seem to stop you.
“About what?” he asks, actually clueless.
“When you’re having sex, what do you think about?” you ask again, taking a sip of your beer.
“...about her, that’s what you’re supposed to do, so,” he trails off, “Sometimes I…think about other things...” he answers, blushing a bit.
“Like what?”
“Just…random stuff. Why do you want to know anyway?” he asks, getting slightly defensive.
“Maybe that's what's distracting you. I don't know, spice things up with her or something. Or have an actual conversation with her about how you feel or whatever.” you mutter as you finish your beer.
He takes another sip of his beer. “Why are you acting like some sort of relationship counselor? You’ve never even really been in a relationship yourself.”
Maybe he wanted to piss you off with what he said, but only so you could back off. “Spice things up”? Yujin and him are fine, he’s deciding that right here, right now. He doesn’t want your help with this or to even discuss it anymore with you. It feels weird. Besides, he doesn’t want you to think that he’s…not good at sex. Not for any other reasons, just that…he doesn’t want you to think that about him.
You set your bottle down and look at him. “Because you’re my friend? I don’t know. Why do you care?” You hold your hand out, wanting him to hand the cigarettes he brought while your other hand digs into your sweatpants pocket for your lighter.
He reaches into the bag and hands them to you, knowing full well you could have grabbed them yourself, yet he still obliged. “So, in all of your hooking up, have you ever had feelings for anyone you hooked up with? And not those bullshit feelings for your douchebag exes, like actual feelings. Or have they all just been hookups?” he asks, hoping to change the subject.
You open the pack, “Hookups.”
“Every single one?”
“Mhm.” you answer, taking one out and putting it into your mouth, lighting it as you take a drag.
“So you’ve never fallen in love with anyone you’ve hooked up with?”
You laugh, “Fallen in love? How stupid.” you say as you take another drag.
“Okay, love might be a strong word, but like, have you never developed feelings for any of the people you’ve hooked up with?” he asks, finishing his beer.
“Nah.”
"Right, right. So, you're just all about hookups then, and that's cool, no shame or anything; I get it. But you've never felt even just a little bit of loneliness from it?" he asks as he sets his bottle down. You ignore his question, taking another drag. He knows by your reaction that he’s said something that bothers you. Whenever anything is mentioned that may reveal how you truly feel, you just block it off and move on. He sighs, not too sure why he bothered asking since you always ignore these types of topics. Sometimes, he wished you wouldn’t. He wished you would be more open with him. It feels like he can talk to you about anything and everything, even if sometimes he doesn’t want to, but he does anyway because you…well, you’re you. "I mean, it's gotta get kinda boring... always hooking up, never really connecting with anyone. Unless you don't care about that kind of thing."
“Love is stupid.” you reply flatly.
What a groundbreaking opinion. Truly, nobody has ever felt or thought the same thing. Great stuff. Sunghoon sighs at your answer, not really getting why you won’t just tell him. He wants you to. He can’t really explain why. It doesn’t have to do with wanting to get some satisfaction out of helping you or changing you, but rather, sometimes he feels like he knows nothing about you. You’re important to him, more than you could possibly understand, but still, sometimes, you seem so distant; like a stranger. He just wants to know that you trust him.
“So, just because love hasn’t exactly worked out in your life, you think love is stupid? I don’t really think that’s fair…just because your ex boyfriends were assholes doesn’t mean that true love doesn’t exist.”
For some reason, him talking about true love pisses you off. It pisses you off greatly. You can feel your skin crawl and anger boiling up inside you, so you take a drag from your cigarette, blowing out the smoke, wishing it was something else you were getting rid of.
“It’s not about them.” you take another drag, “Do you love Yujin?”
You think you know the answer already. No, you know the answer indefinitely. There is only one answer. Why would he have spent the past three–almost four years–dating her if he didn’t? You think about all the times he talked about her when they first started dating. You try not to, but your mind recalls all the details, how he said them, what he said, how he looked while he was talking. It made you sick.
His heart sinks a little when you ask the question. He stares at you for a moment, not responding to your question right away. He takes a long deep breath before he answers, “Yes.” You sit silent. You heard his answer, but you don’t want to acknowledge it. You take another drag from your cigarette, a longer one this time, blowing out the smoke slowly as you tap some of the tobacco from the butt of it off. “Do you…not believe me?” he asks, watching you. He can tell something is on your mind, you’re just having trouble saying it. He’s not asking to be snarky or anything, he asks in more of a gentle tone, just wanting you to open up or at least just say something remotely close to how you feel.
“No, I do.” you answer quietly. For some reason, it hurts to say that. It’s true, though; you do believe him…unfortunately.
Silence consumes the both of you, just sitting on the curb as time passes. Crickets chirp softly in the distance and the subtle burn of the tobacco from your cigarette fills it a bit, but not enough. He stares at you, both annoyed and concerned.
“Then what is it? Are you trying to say there’s something wrong with my relationship?” he asks, suddenly defensive. Even he, himself, doesn’t know why he’s suddenly so defensive about it, especially since he brought up the issue earlier, but he doesn’t like thinking that you think there is something wrong.
“Jesus, it’s not like that.” you respond, knowing full and well it is like that.
“Then spit it out; what are you trying to say?”
“Shut up.”
You take another drag and he rolls his eyes, annoyed. “You know, you’re so annoying sometimes.”
“So are you.”
“Yeah, I know, but you’re worse.”
You take another drag, genuinely wanting him to shut up, or for things to be normal. Or better yet, for things not to be complicated. “Go cry about it to your girlfriend.”
“Screw you.”
“Ditto.”
“Whatever.” he says, pissed off.
“Yeah, whatever.” you mumble as you take another drag.
He continues to look at you, pissed off at how you don’t seem to care about anything. He used to like that a lot about you, how you never cared about what people thought and are able to brush anything off. Maybe “used to” is a bit strong, he still likes that about you, but for right now, it’s incredibly infuriating.
“You know, I’ve noticed that you always avoid giving direct answers to questions. Maybe that’s why you’re so scared of commitment; Not willing to really speak your mind out of fear of hurting someone’s feelings or your own.” he says, hoping this would piss you off enough to just say how you feel.
You roll your eyes, “Shut up.” you say as you continue smoking your cigarette.
“No, I won't shut up. In fact, I'm gonna keep talking because this is one of the rare occasions where we’re actually having a serious conversation and not just talking about petty stuff.”
You roll your eyes again. “I don’t want to.” you reply, simply.
“Too bad. because I am really curious about it. So, I’m just gonna keep asking questions. Like, have you ever experienced real heartbreak before? Because you seem like the type that just throws people away and moves on with no remorse.” You become quiet. Sure, you weren’t answering before, well, barely, anyway. But this time, you feel like you’re shrinking. That type of quiet. The type of quiet you become when you feel like you got caught and you don’t want to admit to what you did. You just smoke your cigarette. “And you don’t just avoid answering questions about your romantic life, either. You do the same thing when it comes to family, friends, and anyone else. You just push people away and never actually let anyone get to know the real you.”
“You know the real me.” you say, looking at him. In all honesty, you were insulted. He was seriously telling you that he “doesn’t know the real you” after you guys have been friends since you were two years old? What does that say about your friendship?
“No, I really don’t. All I know about you is the surface layer stuff that you’re willing to share, but I don't actually know you. No one does. Because you never let anyone get close enough.” he says as he looks you directly in the eyes, meaning every word he says. Well, maybe not every word, but it is how he feels. He doesn’t want you to get frustrated, but if that’s what it takes for you to finally say how you feel, then so be it. You do feel yourself getting frustrated and you look away, taking another drag. “And don’t deny it, ‘cause you know it’s true. You just push people away and never let yourself be vulnerable, ‘cause if you did, then they could use that vulnerability against you. And god forbid anybody ever find out about your deepest insecurities-”
“Shut the fuck up.” you say, feeling anger seethe out of you. He sits there, somewhat stunned by your response. Not exactly that you became angry, but more so that he actually got a reaction out of you. He watches you as you put your cigarette out and stand up. “I’m going back to my room.” you mutter.
He stands up. “Seriously?” he says as he sees you start to walk away. He scoffs. “You’re just going to leave? Like that? Whatever.” he mumbles as he grabs the pack of cigarettes you put back into the bag (the pack he specifically bought for you and always buys whenever you guys hang out like this). He opens it and grabs one, lighting it as he sees you turn around. You walk back over to him and snatch the pack of cigarettes from his hand. “The hell?” he asks, annoyed, as he tries to grab it back.
You hold it out of his reach. “You don’t even like red Marlboros.” you say, almost tempted to take the one out of his mouth, too just to spite him.
“Give it back.” he says sternly as he takes a small drag from the one in his mouth, holding it between his fingers as he glares at you.
“No.”
“It’s my pack of cigarettes.”
“That you bought for me.”
“And I want it back.”
“Well, tough shit, I’m not giving it back.”
“Give it.” he says as he holds out his hand. You ignore him and turn around, starting to walk away. He takes another drag, grimacing because you’re right, he doesn’t like this brand, but he’s only doing this to spite you. He gets even more pissed off just seeing you walk away. “Why are you always such a pain in the ass?”
“Could ask you the same thing.” you yell back.
He quickly puts out the cigarette and puts the bottles into the bag before catching up to you. “I'm not the one who’s always being super mean and acting all mysterious about everything. Like, what’s with all the attitude and snarky comments? You’ve been extra shitty lately.”
“Fuck you.”
He scoffs, “Yeah, that’s what I thought. You know, you’re being shitty, you just don’t wanna admit it.”
You stop walking and turn to look at him, throwing the pack at him. “Then go away.”
He grits his teeth and grabs the pack from the ground. He looks at you, “Whatever. I'm leaving. But just know, one of these days, you’re going to actually push someone away for good.”
“Hopefully it’s you.” you say as you cross your arms.
“Yeah, me too. Because I am so fed up with your bullshit.”
“Great. Go away.”
He rolls his eyes and walks past you, his arm bumping into yours purposefully as he heads back to his dorm.
-
As Sunghoon makes his way to his lecture, he sees Yujin in the distance talking to some of her friends. He thinks about your conversation last night. He had hopes of confiding in you a bit more about how he felt, but of course that’s not the way things panned out. He had no time to focus on that, even if he was feeling even worse now that he possibly lost his best friend for good. Shit…did he really lose you for good? He feels his blood run cold, but he’s trying to forget it and focus on her. She’s his girlfriend, he has to remember that. He walks up to her, smiling a bit. She looks at him.
“Oh…hey.” she says softly.
“Hey…can we talk for a minute?” She nods her head and stands still. Sunghoon glances at her friends and then looks back at her. “...in private?” Yujin glances at her friends before following Sunghoon over into the library, taking a seat at a table near one of the back bookshelves, a little bit of space between the two of them. “Is there a reason you’ve been acting like this lately? Do you not…want to be with me anymore?” Sunghoon asks, just getting straight to the point.
Yujin is quiet for a moment. “Everything is fine.” she says.
He crosses his arms, feeling himself getting frustrated. Why can’t people just be direct like you? Yeah, you’re not really direct with your feelings, but you are when it comes to anything else. “Are you sure? Because you've been really distant. We haven't been talking as often, you barely want to spend time with me... and it feels like you're avoiding being intimate with me, too. I had to almost beg you to spend time with me last week. Is there really nothing? Are you sure everything is fine?” Yujin listens and stays quiet. Sunghoon sighs. "You know, couples are supposed to communicate and shit, right? If something is bothering you, just come out and say it." Sure, he took a page from your book with what you said last night and perhaps some of what you said rang true after all, but he’s not really looking to give you a “you were right” moment at this time.
“You being friends with her bothers me.” Yujin says as she crosses her arms.
Sunghoon freezes for a moment, taken aback by her response. “...are you being serious?” he asks, not totally sure if she’s just messing with him.
“You hang out with her more than me to the point that I had to ask you to stop texting her whenever we would hang out and you always say you’re “just best friends”, but I don’t believe you. Do you have feelings for her?”
“Do YOU think I have feelings for her?” Sunghoon asks, becoming defensive while also avoiding answering her question directly.
“Yes.” she answers, simply.
“What, do you think I’ll dump you for her or something?”
"She's a slut. You know it, I know it, everybody knows it. I don't care if you guys are close, I'm worried she is going to make a move on you and then you break up with me just for her to use you once and then ruin you; She's bad news." Yujin says.
He feels his jaw drop a bit at what she says. Did she seriously just say that? And so boldly? He feels himself become upset about the way she talks about you. He wants to defend you, he always has, but he frowns. What if this leads to Yujin breaking up with him? You did say last night that you two were done with each other, so why does it matter? He doesn’t agree with Yujin, but he wants to save this relationship…
“You really think I'm that naive? That I'd fall for a girl like her? Just because we’re close friends doesn’t mean I automatically get feelings for her and forget about you. You know I'm smart enough to not get mixed up with someone like her.” he says, feeling like his heart is breaking as he says it. He wants Yujin to feel reassured, but after saying this…it doesn’t feel worth it.
“So you agree.” Yujin says.
Sunghoon sits there, feeling like he’s about to throw up. Why is this so hard? Why can’t he just say ‘yes’ and move on? Why can’t he be happy with Yujin? He just nods his head. “I wouldn’t fall for someone like her.” he says extremely quietly, almost as if he never wanted those words to leave his mouth. But they did and it was too late.
Yujin smiles, satisfied by his answer. She leans in and kisses his lips quickly, “I believe you.” she says softly.
Sunghoon hesitates, not glad that she believes him. Not glad that she said those things about you. Not glad that he said those things about you. He’s just not happy. He gives her a small smile and kisses her cheek quickly. “I’m glad.”
-
You are sitting on a bench, scrolling through your phone as you wait for your next lecture to start soon. Sunghoon sees you as he exits his lecture hall and his gaze lingers on you for a moment. He sighs to himself a bit, feeling like he was being pulled in two different directions. The more he thinks about it, he feels as though Yujin was giving him an ultimatum to choose you or her. If she said it outright, there isn’t a cell in his body that would hesitate to choose you. He thinks back to his conversation with Yujin in the library and he feels sick; he knows he did something wrong.
He walks over to you and takes a seat next to you, just wanting to make up and move on. To his surprise, however, you get up immediately and take your bag before walking away. He sits there, confused, but figures you’re still upset about the argument last night. He gets up and he follows you before catching up and gently grabbing your arm, but you end up taking it away and start walking again. He bites the inside of his cheek before stepping in front of you, “Why are you walking away from me?”
“Get away from me.”
“No.” he said as quickly as the words left your mouth.
You look at him, feeling your eyes sting, hot tears wanting to form, but you blink them away. “You should probably go find your girlfriend, you wouldn’t want to be seen hanging out with a slut like me, right?” you ask rhetorically.
“Hey-,” he cuts you off, frowning instantly when you call yourself that. “Stop it…you know I don’t see you that way.”
“That’s a fucking lie; I heard you talking to Yujin. Or are you surprised about that too since you were in the library and someone like me couldn’t possibly be in a place like that.” you say as you cross your arms, swallowing as if that will help mask your clear frustration.
“...what?” he asks quietly, freezing as he realizes what you’re saying.
“I heard you. I heard you agree with her when she called me a slut. I heard you say you "would never be stupid to fall for someone like me". Well, fuck you. Go be with your perfect girlfriend, asshole.” you say before you push past him, swallowing again, but this time to stop yourself from crying.
“Wait-” he tries to grab your arm again, but you pull it away and keep walking. He feels his heart sink as he watches you walk away. The world felt as if it just collapsed. He feels like he’s sinking and as he watches you become further from him, he feels like he’s lost everything. He’s holding his breath, not necessarily realizing he is, almost as if he exhales, he’s not sure he has the strength to take another breath knowing he’s hurt you; he doesn’t deserve to.
-
Everything moves in slow motion, all voices muffled, as Sunghoon feels himself being dragged inside of a party by Yujin. He can hear and see her laughing and talking with her friends as they walk inside the loud and crowded atmosphere, but he feels as if he’s hollow. He stands there like a zombie as Yujin talks and greets some of her friends. He’s not sure how it happened, especially since it was almost midnight and he honestly just wanted to go to sleep, but he somehow ended up here. His eyes felt heavy as they looked around the room, but he subconsciously stood up straighter when his eyes landed on you. It was like he had been resuscitated, his heart beating rapidly as he sees you and then he sees him.
Sunghoon rolls his eyes, noticing how Sungchan was standing closely to you, how his eyes scanned every inch of your body with some stupid, smug smirk on his face. Sunghoon rolled his eyes again and grimaced at the sight. He sees how you whisper something into his ear, Sungchan grinning as he places his hand on your hip. Suddenly, Sunghoon’s heart stopped again as his gaze fixates on his hand. His hand grips Yujin’s tightly as he clenches his jaw and his other hand curls into a fist, his fingernails digging into the palm of his hand. His breathing becomes heavy as he sees you smile, smile in a way he’s never had you smile at him before as your hand caresses Sungchan’s cheek while you clearly flirt back with him. Sunghoon was livid. He feels like an extra in his own life as he watches you fall for someone like that.
“Baby…?” Yujin asks, loosening her hand and taking it away from him since he was practically cutting off her circulation.
“I’m fine.” he mumbles, hints of anger and annoyance clear in his tone. He doesn’t look at her as he answers and she catches on.
She looks to where his gaze is and then she looks back at him, upset. “Why are you looking at her?” she asks as she crosses her arms. “You told me you don’t have feelings for her. I’m your girlfriend, not her.”
“Stop, Yujin, it’s not like that…” he mumbles, annoyed as he keeps looking at you and Sungchan. He watches as Sungchan puts his arm around your waist and he feels like the air has just been knocked out of him. His tongue pokes the inside of his cheek as he glares at the two of you, wanting nothing more than to shove him off of you.
Yujin scoffs, “I don’t even see how you could have feelings for a slut like her.” she mumbles, taking a sip of a drink her friend brought for her. Sunghoon keeps his attention on you. How Sungchan keeps you close, whispers in your ear to make you giggle and you indulge in it, how he touches you, and how he looks at you as if he’s some sick animal that wants to devour you. “Did you even hear me?” Yujin asks, pissed off.
“Yeah, I heard you.” Sunghoon mumbles as he continues watching the two of you.
Yujin glares at him and then grabs his hand, dragging him away from her friends. Sunghoon just goes along with it and as Yujin starts dragging him upstairs, Sungchan leas in and kisses you. Sunghoon’s eyes widen as he continues going upstairs with Yujin, her dragging him into an empty bedroom and closes the door behind them. Sunghoon feels like all thoughts had escaped him when he saw that and he stands there with only one thing on his mind: you.
“Let’s have sex.” Yujin says as she looks at him.
Sunghoon snaps out of it and looks at her, feeling like this is his first time seeing her tonight. He looks at her in confusion, not wanting to since he only has you on his mind, but he doesn’t want to upset her any further, so he nods his head. Yujin pulls him towards her and kisses him. He hesitates, feeling himself grimace, but he tries to ignore it and kiss her back. He doesn’t want to be up here with her, he wants to be down there with you. As they continue to kiss, Yujin begins to undress herself and Sunghoon feels himself tense up. He tries to forget about you and focus on her, thinking maybe helping her undress would help, but it doesn’t. Not even a little bit.
Yujin moves them over to the bed as she keeps kissing him and he sits there, partially kissing her back and also sitting stiff as a board. He knows this is supposed to be hot for him, having a practically naked girl on him, but he only finds himself wishing it was you. Yujin kisses down his neck as she takes off his shirt and he feels like he’s zoning out, not moving a muscle. Yujin moves her hands along his chest and down his body and then stops kissing him as she looks at him.
“You’re not even hard.” she says as she frowns. Sunghoon just stares at her, not necessarily surprised, but he still feels bad. "What the hell do you even like about her? She's a fucking whore who opens her legs for any and every guy. She has nothing else to offer besides her fucking pussy, which probably is already stretched beyond repair." Yujin says, angry. "She's nothing! She's not even special and yet she always gets any guy she wants. Well, why does she get you too?" Yujin tears up. "I'M your girlfriend, not her! Do you even love me?" Yujin asks, frustrated.
Sunghoon knows her anger is justified and he feels awful for feeling like he wants her to be you instead. As he watches and hears her say all of these things, he feels bad for treating her like this, but he also becomes angry at listening to what she’s saying about you. He feels bad for saying it feels like he doesn’t know you, because he does, and he knows you’re nothing like who she says you are.
“Answer me!” Yujin yells.
“I do love you.” Sunghoon says quickly.
“...do you love her?”
He stays quiet. Does he love you? He doesn’t know how to answer that. He knows he cares about you more than anyone else, he knows that even when you two fight, he would never want anyone else but you to be by his side, he knows that you’re the only one who gets him, he knows he likes making you smile and laugh and sometimes when you look at him, he feels like he can just look back at you forever. But is that love? Then, what is it he feels for Yujin? Does he love you and not her? How come he never realized it before? Did he always feel this way?
"Why the hell did you even ask me out? Why did you even ask me to be your girlfriend if all this time, you've wanted her? If all this time you've been in love with her?" Yujin asks, furious.
What is he supposed to say? Has he always been in love with you? He thinks for a moment. He thinks about why he asked her out in the first place, about a week after you hooked up with some guy after you two just started college. Was that the reason? Was it because he just wanted something and he knows deep down, you don’t want the same, so he found it somewhere else? You…everything has always been about you, his whole world has always revolved around you.
Yujin gets up and gets dressed. "If you want to be with her so badly, fine. But just know, she's still a whore. She'll just use you and then toss you aside." Yujin says as she finishes getting dressed. "But by all means, go sleep with that slut. We're done." Yujin says as she leaves the room.
Sunghoon sits on the bed in silence. Just great. Now, he doesn’t have a girlfriend and worst of all, he still can’t have you. He sits there for a moment longer before getting up and putting back on his shirt. Screw this party, he shouldn’t have come anyway. He walks out of the bedroom and goes downstairs, feeling like his mind is in a different place as he walks outside. He stops and notices you sitting on the curb, smoking a cigarette. He feels relieved, not seeing you in Sungchan’s arms, and for a split second, he wishes he could just walk over and take you into his, but he pushes that thought away and just decides to take a seat beside you on the curb instead. You scoot away a bit from him, silence looming over the two of you and he feels even worse.
“You shouldn’t be sitting here, you know. Your girlfriend might get pissy.” you mumble as you exhale some smoke.
“I’m not with Yujin anymore.”
You pause for a moment, “...I saw you two go upstairs.”
“She just…got upset that I couldn’t get hard. I just had so many thoughts running through my mind…” he trails off, not wanting to ramble on about it.
“Whatever.” you say as you take another drag.
“I wish I never asked her out.” he says before taking a deep breath, feeling like he said something he didn’t even realize he was keeping a secret, not even from himself.
“Why are you telling me this? In case you forgot, I am not your friend anymore. Not after what you and her said about me this morning.” You take another drag, “It's one thing for her to call me a slut, I don't care about her, but you? You agreed with her. You made fun of me. You're supposed to be my best friend and you say I'm a slut and then that you aren't "stupid" enough to date "someone like me"? Fuck you, honestly. I was so pissed when I heard that. I know we fought the other night, but I never thought you would say that shit about me.” You take another drag. “So stop talking to me about your problems like we're still friends. You want nothing to do with "someone like me"? Well, then, you got it.”
Sunghoon stays silent, feeling as if everything around him is crumbling. You’re sitting maybe a foot away from him, but he feels like you’re on the other side of the planet. “I’m sorry.” he says softly, feeling ashamed to have talked about you like that.
You shake your head and continue smoking. “Whatever.”
“I miss you.” he says suddenly. “And, I shouldn’t have said any of that this morning. I was trying to reassure Yujin at your expense and…that was a big fuck up by me. None of what I said was worth any pain I’ve caused you.”
“Well, I don’t miss you. I don’t even care.”
Sunghoon stays quiet for a moment. “I have to fix this. Not because I feel like it will make me feel better to know I said sorry, because that doesn’t fix anything; that doesn’t make you feel better. I want to fix this because, even if you don’t believe me, I value our friendship more than anything in the world.”
You scoff and don’t reply, blinking away your tears as you continue smoking. “I don’t need you. Think what you want about me, I don’t give a fuck.”
“Hey…” he says tentatively as he notices you blinking away tears. He feels like he got punched in the gut and hates himself for knowing he’s the one that caused you to feel this way. “I know I hurt you…a lot.” he admits. He doesn’t know if you would want to listen to anything else he has to say, but he wants nothing more than for everything to go back to normal. To have you back. To just have you look at him. Anything.
You scoff, “You? As if.” you say as you put out your cigarette. “Don’t flatter yourself. Like I care about your opinion.” you say as you stand up. “I don’t need your pity and I don’t need your friendship. I don’t need you.” you say as you walk away and back into the party.
He doesn’t hesitate to follow you, not wanting to let you go. He can’t. He can’t bear the thought of you actually not being a part of his life, not for one goddamn second. He tries to catch up to you, but he stops in his tracks when he sees you go back over to Sungchan. It feels as though time has stopped and he was cursed with having to watch you be with him for the rest of his life. You whisper something to Sungchan, prompting him to grin and put his hands on your waist. Sunghoon feels like he’s about to collapse as he watches Sungchan whisper something back to you before taking your hand and leading you upstairs. He wants to do something, take you away from him, tell you that you mean so much more and are so much more than whatever Sungchan thinks about you. How you mean everything to him and watching you walk upstairs with some other guy feels as though you are taking away every piece of Sunghoon, breaking him apart. But he doesn’t and an hour passes before you walk back downstairs with Sungchan, his arm around your waist.
Sungchan whispers something in your ear before letting you go and walking over to his friends, all of them laughing and teasing him. You just walk back out of the party, feeling sick to your stomach; as if you just made the biggest mistake of your life; shame. As you walk down the sidewalk, the night suddenly feels much colder than before. You take out your cigarettes and start smoking another one. Sunghoon follows and catches up, “Can I have one?” he asks, not knowing what else to say, but wanting to say something. You stay quiet, but eventually extend the one you were smoking to him. You stop walking as he takes it, taking a drag as he stands beside you.
You hold out your hand, wanting it back and after he takes another inhale from it, he exchanges it back. You take another drag, staying quiet, as you extend it back to him. He takes it as you two share the cigarette and he hands it back to you, almost wanting to just hold your hand instead. You take a long drag, holding the smoke for a while before slowly exhaling. “...you were right.” you say quietly as you hold the cigarette out for him. “It is lonely.”
He takes the cigarette, feeling hopeful that this is the beginning of an honest conversation, and relieved that you’re opening up. He hands it back to you, “Are you lonely? Do you miss having a relationship?” he asks, softly, wanting to make sure he’s being cautious so he doesn’t hurt you again.
“Not the ones I used to be in, no. Those guys were��well, you know.”
“Yeah…” he mumbles. You sigh and take a seat on the curb. He follows suit, seeing if you’ll say something else, but deciding to break the silence. “So…what kind of guy do you want?” he asks, deep down hoping for a certain answer.
You don’t answer him and instead, ignore his question. In all honesty, you don’t know. Well, you do, but you’re too scared to admit it. “You were also right about me being a slut.”
“I-I didn’t mean it-”
“You know it, everybody else knows it…and I always knew it.” You take your cigarette back and take a drag. “Hearing you say it sucked, though, but I know it’s the truth.”
“I shouldn’t have said it. I was so caught up in trying to make Yujin feel better and fix things between us when it wasn’t worth it. Not when it came at your expense.”
“I know.”
“I should’ve still stuck up for you. It didn’t matter if she was my girlfriend, you don’t deserve to be talked about like that.”
You shrug and hand him the cigarette, lighting a new one for yourself to smoke. “I don’t care anymore. Hooking up with Sungchan just now made me realize it. Seeing and hearing his friends tease him for it…” you take a long drag, “I knew that’s what I am.”
He does the same and looks at you. “Did you want to hook up with him?”
“No.”
“Then, why did you do it?” You ignore his question and keep smoking. “Hey…” he says softly. He knows you’re avoiding his question, but he wants to hear what you have to say.
“What happened with you and Yujin tonight?” you ask, wanting to change the subject.
“Just…an argument.”
“About…?”
“That’s not important.”
“You wanted to tell me all about it earlier. You said something about you not getting hard and regretting asking her out. What the hell happened? I thought you loved her or whatever.” you mumble as you inhale more smoke, a part of you hoping it chokes you.
“I do love her. But I guess…it meant something different to her. She wanted things from me I couldn’t do.”
“Like what.”
“Like…her not wanting us to be friends anymore.”
You scoff before continuing to smoke. “You should’ve chosen her.”
Sunghoon raises an eyebrow as he takes a drag. “You think I shouldn't have chosen my friend who's been with me through thick and thin over someone who was basically controlling who I talked to?”
“She was just controlling that you don't talk to me. Can't blame her, she probably thought I would try to sleep with you or something. Besides, since when did us being friends for so long suddenly matter? It didn't when you agreed with her about me being a slut.”
“It matters to me.” He says, feeling his heart sink a little at your words. It seemed like you didn’t think your friendship meant anything. He takes another drag and sighs quietly before continuing. “You’re my best friend. I care about you more than anyone else.” You stay silent as you continue to smoke. “Do you really think I don’t care about you?” he asks, softly. You just keep smoking, not really sure how to answer. He sighs to himself as he does the same and his mind wanders to thinking about you and Sungchan again. He rolls his eyes to himself as he tries to push those thoughts out of his head.
“You asked me if I ever felt heartbreak when we fought that night, talking about if that’s why I have commitment issues or whatever.” you say as you take another drag. “Yeah…I have.”
“Was the heartbreak from…” he let’s the question linger in the air for a moment, “a relationship?” You shake your head. “So…what was it from then? Who broke your heart?”
You stay silent for a moment, just smoking “...i didn't realize I fell in love with him until he got a girlfriend, well, his first serious girlfriend. At first, I didn't really care, but then…” you go quiet for a moment as you keep looking ahead, not at him. “The way he talked about her, would smile a certain way when he was with her, like he's never smiled at me before...laughing at jokes they shared...seeing him kiss her, hold her hand…” you take another drag, “holding her hand..” you repeat, like you’re lost in thought. “It's something so stupid and simple, but I've never had a guy hold my hand romantically...but he held hers and I remember feeling like I couldn't breathe. I couldn't do a damn thing but suddenly wish I was his girlfriend instead. And then I realized. I loved him.” you take another drag, “I loved him and he was in love with someone else.”
He stayed quiet the whole time you talked. He took in every single word. He took in how you said every single word, how you looked as you spoke. He felt his heart break for you. The way you talked about it was nothing like he’s ever heard you talk about; so…innocent. “Did you ever try to tell him how you felt?”
You stay quiet for a moment as you swallow. “I almost did. One time. I just felt so tired from pretending and I didn't want to just hookup with anyone anymore. I wanted to be his more than anything in the world. I almost told him and then…” you take another drag from your cigarette. “He started telling me about how he finally had sex with his girlfriend. How hot she is. How he had never seen anyone so beautiful. How he couldn't believe he was so lucky to be dating her. Fuck-” you pinch your thigh to stop yourself from crying as you take another drag. “I felt so...gross. I had never had a guy say that about me, never had a guy be proud to be with me, but the way he talked about her and everything he was saying...I knew he would laugh in my face if I, just some slut, was in love with him; he would feel grossed out or whatever. No matter how close I thought we were, I knew right then and there I would never be like her. Never like the girl he wanted.” you take another drag, “So I didn't say anything.”
Sunghoon stayed quiet again, feeling awful. He hated that you thought about yourself that way. He hated that other people had made you feel that…him included. He hated this guy, especially, for making you feel this way. What a piece of shit. You deserve nothing but the best and this guy pulls this bullshit with you? He was about ready to punch him in the face. “And you’re still friends with him? After he did all of this to you?”
“He’s all I’ve ever had.”
“He’s not all you have, though. What about me?” he asks, intending to make something positive out of this all. He just wants you to know how precious you are to him because he cares about you so much.
This, doesn’t help whatsoever, and you feel like you’re about to burst into tears. You can’t tell if he’s the idiot or if you are; maybe the latter. But when he says that, you just feel like sobbing, curling up into a ball, and dying right then and there. You pinch your thigh again, to prevent yourself from crying because you absolutely loathe it.
He notices and immediately puts his hand on yours to stop you. He hates seeing you like this and he looks at you, not wanting you to suppress this anymore.
His hand on yours, however, makes you feel even worse. Worse because it makes your stomach do flips and you can feel your heart beat faster. Worse because you know it only carries the connotation of a friend comforting a friend…nothing more. You pull your hand away and continue smoking.
He doesn’t say anything and he doesn’t try to take your hand back. It hurts him to see you pull yourself away. He just wants to make you feel better, feel safe, feel loved. Feel nothing but happiness because that’s all you deserve. But you don’t. He wants to give you everything, and so, he tries again to comfort you. He reaches for your hand, gently taking it into his, it enveloping yours as he holds it as if it is the most delicate thing on earth.
“Don’t.” you whisper, taking your hand away.
You didn’t want to. God, you didn’t want to. His hand felt like silk against yours, but you felt like you didn’t deserve it. Compared to his, your hand was like felt, worth far less than his. You didn’t want him to hold your hand, not like this. You wanted it to mean something, have some sort of value. Not for comfort. Not because he’s your best friend. Not because he felt bad. But because he loved you. Because he wanted to hold your hand and be proud as he held it. Because he wanted to claim you as is. Because you wanted to be his.
He lets go of your hand and stays silent for a moment. It was as if a part of him died inside as you pulled away your hand. All the thoughts that he was having a few seconds ago were replaced by sadness. His hands tightened into fists from the frustration of being unable to comfort you or take away your sadness. He wanted so desperately to try again, but he knew that there was nothing he could do right now. Slowly, he takes another drag of his cigarette, and you do the same with yours.
“Did you cry whenever he would talk about his girlfriend like that? Did you cry anytime he complimented her?”
You don’t answer for a while. “Yeah. When he told me he loved her, I cried later. After that, I pretended like I didn't care. And for a while, it worked. I would just hook up with guys and I would still talk and hang out with him because he didn't treat me like what everyone else saw me as. He never did. And that's one of the reasons I fell in love with him, I guess, but then sometimes...he would start talking about her and then I just...felt worse. At some point, I just kind of felt numb about it, especially after he told me about the first time they had sex. He talked about it like it was so special...like she was so special...and I just decided then and there I couldn't love him. So, I just pretended and after a while, I thought I didn't love him anymore, but one night, he started talking about how he couldn't lose his girlfriend, how he wanted to make things with her work and I felt that same feeling again, like I was going to be sick. Then, I heard him say what he really thought about me and that was the last time I cried about him.”
“What did he say about you? Did he insult you?” he asks as he feels himself becoming angry, wondering what this jerk could’ve possibly said about you to make you feel this way. But, you don’t answer, you just remain quiet and that made him want to punch this guy even more. “Do you miss him?” he asks, quietly.
“...i miss being oblivious to the fact that I love him.”
He feels his heart drop when you say that. You still love him? He swallows, feeling like he’s choking and as if all of the oxygen has been sucked out of the atmosphere. “So…you do love him. You’re still in love with him?” Once you ignore him again, the answer is clear. “You do still love him…” he mumbles. Anger courses through his veins because you’re in love with someone so fucking awful. How could you give all of yourself to someone who is too blind to see how much you’re worth? How much you mean and value you provide to the meaning of life it’s goddamn self? He watches as you continue smoking. “So, you mean to tell me, after everything he’s done to you, you still love him?”
“He doesn’t know.”
“He doesn’t know you’re in love with him?”
“I told you, I never told him.”
This doesn’t help him feel any less bad for you. Some douche was out and about being happy and in love while you suffer on the sidelines? “Are you ever going to tell him?”
You shake your head as you look down. How could you? Especially since you’re delivering this whole pathetic monologue and he still isn’t taking any goddamn hint.
“Is it because he’s still with his girlfriend?”
“I don’t want to talk about this.” you say as you finish your cigarette.
He becomes frustrated, “Is he?”
“No.”
“So, they broke up.” You ignore his question once more. He waits a few seconds before speaking up again, “I’m taking that as a ‘yes’ then.”
“Why does it matter? Why do you care?”
“Why do I care?” he asks as if this question has the most obvious answer. He scoffs and takes another drag out of frustration. “Because I’m your best friend, dumbass.”
This only makes you frown as you pinch your thigh again to stop the tears threatening to fall. He frowns as well when he sees this and reaches his hand over again. “Stop.” he says as he grabs your hand. You look down at your hands and you take yours away again. He feels a lump form in his throat when you pull your hand away as a pit of sadness just keeps growing and growing in his stomach. “Why are you doing that? …do you honestly think I don’t care about you?” You just keep staring ahead of you, not looking at him once. He takes another drag and sighs. “Have I ever given you a reason for you to think that I don’t care? Have I hurt you like that guy did?”
His questions make you stay silent for a long time. You wish that you could just disappear. Or that you could go back in time and stop yourself from having these stupid feelings. Or…that you never met him in the first place. Maybe then things would be easier. Better.
“Just…answer me.” he says, pleading, almost. He wants you to understand that he is here for you, he always will be and nothing is going to get in the way of that anymore. He wants this to be clear, so he tries to hold your hand again to show his support, but you take it away once he does.
“Are you pretending or are you actually this clueless?” you ask, becoming frustrated, your voice having a hint of pain in it.
His stomach tightened when you rejected him once more. He doesn’t look at you, suddenly afraid to see your expression. He doesn’t know what to do, how to make you feel better. He stays silent for a moment and continues smoking. “Pretending about what?” he asks. You become increasingly frustrated and pinch your thigh again. He notices and grabs your hand again, “Stop.” he says sternly, but you pull your hand away.
“Jesus, you’re the guy.”
He feels himself freeze. “What the hell do you mean ‘I’m the guy’?”
“Are you dense?” you raise an eyebrow. “You’re the guy I’ve been talking about this whole damn time!”
“...i’m the guy?” he asks, completely stunned. You let out a huff of frustration and stand up, walking away. He doesn’t hesitate to stand up and go after you. He grabs your arm to stop you. “Wait, you can’t just leave…”
You keep pinching your thigh, a part of you believing it will wake you up from this nightmare as you avoid his gaze. You take your arm away from his grip. “Just forget it.”
“No. You just said I’m the guy, right? The one you’re in love with?” He asks, all of his focus on you. You ignore his question and turn around, walking away. He groans and he moves in front of you, stopping you. “You love me?” But you just avoid his gaze and don’t answer his question. He sighs, “I’m not letting you leave until you tell me.”
“No.”
He frowns. “Look at me.” he whispers. “Please…” he moves closer to you. “Do you love me?”
“Why does it matter?”
“You tell me. Why doesn’t it matter?”
You punch your thigh harshly a few times as you finally look at him. Your breath hitches as tears well in your eyes, despite you trying to ignore them. “Because I’m just a slut.”
He grabs your hand and stops you. He feels panicked, not knowing what to do or say. He doesn’t want you to cry or punish yourself. “Stop it. Stop with that bullshit. You’re not a slut, don’t you dare ever call yourself that.”
“You said it yourself. You agree with everyone else. I know you don't feel the same. I know you'll never talk about me the way you talk about Yujin or see me the way you see her. I know you said you guys broke up, but so what? I know what I am and I know that's all I'll ever be.”
He feels tears prick his own eyes as he listens to you. He shakes his head, “Stop that. Stop saying that I’ll never feel the same. Stop saying that you’re just a slut.”
“It doesn’t matter.”
“It does matter! It matters to me. You’re not just “some slut”. You’re my best friend.”
You frown as you feel the urge to cry become stronger. You take your hand away and you pinch your thigh again, just wanting the tears to go away. What he said made you feel awful. It’s not what you wanted to hear. You didn’t want to be just that…and he just kept reminding you that that’s all you are. “...do you honestly think that makes me feel better?”
He frowns, “Fine. Maybe it doesn’t make you feel better. But it should. Because it’s the fucking truth.”
“Are you even thinking about what I told you? Are you even thinking about how you're the guy I've been talking about? How every time you talked about Yujin, every time I saw you hold her hand, how you talked about her when you told me about the first time you guys had sex, that I just wanted to curl up and die? You don't get it. You calling me your best friend doesn't make me feel any fucking better. It makes me feel worse than when people call me a slut. But I don't want you to stand here and try to make me feel better, because if you think telling me you care about me because I'm your 'best friend' is going to make me feel better, then you haven't listened to a damn thing I've said.”
He stares at you sympathetically. He stares at you as he realizes just how badly he’s broken your heart. As he realizes he broke your heart.
“I don't want to be your best friend. I don't want you to tell me I'm your best friend.” You keep pinching your thigh harder, but tears roll down your cheeks anyway. “I wanted it to be me.” you say as you cry even though you keep pinching harder. “I wanted to hold your hand romantically. I wanted you to smile at me the way you did with her. I wanted you to talk about me the way you talked about her.” Your breath hitches as you cry and pinch your thigh harder, your nails digging into your skin. “I wanted to be special to you. I wanted you to tell me you love me. I wanted to be your girlfriend...more than anything in the world.” You cry harder even though you try not to and you dig your nails more into your thigh.
He’s never seen you cry. Not when you broke your arm, not when your pet goldfish died, not when your first boyfriend broke up with you, not even when you get incredibly frustrated. He has never seen you cry. But he hates it. He doesn’t want to see you so sad, so hurt, in so much pain…and he hated it even more because he–the one person you loved more than anything else–was the one who was making you feel this way. He pulls you into him, hugging you tightly, just wanting to take your pain away, just wanting you to…feel loved. But you push him away and wipe your tears, and he notices the imprints from your nails on your thighs. He doesn’t even realize it, but he reaches his hand out and gently touches the marks as he looks at them. He touches the ridges softly and your skin feels so smooth to him, so precious, but you push his hand away. His eyes travel up to meet yours and he sees you’ve stopped crying.
“Why wouldn’t you just have told me how you felt?” he asks, quietly.
“For starters, you had a girlfriend. The other reason: it doesn’t matter.”
“What if I never got with Yujin? What if I was single the whole time?”
“I didn’t realize I loved you until you started dating her…”
“Why her? I’ve dated other girls before, so why her?”
You shrug, “She’s the only one you really seemed to be serious about…the only one you told you loved. Besides…I’m not some sort of homewrecker.”
“I wish you told me.” he whispers. “You were never going to tell me?”
“No.”
“So, you were just hoping I would never find out?”
“Yes.”
“So, you were just going to keep that secret for the rest of your life?”
“Yeah.”
“So, you were just going to live with that pain forever?”
“Are you going to keep asking the same question?”
“I just want to know…” he says as if he’s desperate. “Why…why would you not tell me?”
“Because you were with Yujin! Because you kept telling me how much you loved her! How pretty you thought she was, how happy you were to be with her, how smart and kind and funny and fucking perfect you thought she was! You were happy. You were happy with someone who wasn't me and although that killed me, you were happy. I couldn't do that to you.” you say as your voice breaks.
“So that justified you suffering in silence? Why would you rather see me happy while you were in pain?”
You look at him like the answer was obvious. How does he not get it? You stare at him as you remain quiet, looking at him as if it’s your last time. “Because I love you.” you say, softly.
He feels like you’re looking at him as if he is the most special person to walk on earth. He swallows out of nervousness as he realizes you gave him your heart completely. “You love me so much that you were willing to put yourself through hell just to see me be happy?” He doesn’t feel worthy of that…but you seem to think he is. You love him.
“Wouldn’t you have done the same for Yujin?”
You don’t want to hear him answer this. You don’t want to know, but you feel like he doesn’t understand. You feel like you keep repeating yourself and he’s relishing in it.
He doesn’t know how to answer. Would he? Hearing how you describe your love for him, he realizes what he felt for Yujin maybe wasn’t love. Maybe it was comfort. Or security. Or the fact that someone wanted to be with him so seriously. Maybe he did love her, but…not the way you love him. This sounds like love. This sounds like what he was supposed to feel. “Yes…” he says, not really sure if that’s true. He wants to believe he loves her. He wants to believe he didn’t waste almost four years on something that ends up meaning absolutely nothing. He has to love her.
“Then you get it.”
“Did you just hope we would break up one day so you and I would get together?”
You sigh, “You still don't get it. I know you don't feel the same way. I know I am not the type of girl you want to be with. I'm not the type of girl any guy wants to be with seriously.”
How could you say that about yourself? Sunghoon doesn’t believe any of that, not for a single fucking second. “That isn’t true. You’re smart, kind, funny, and pretty.”
“Stop.”
“No. It’s true. Everything I just said is true. You think no guy would be able to fall in love with you, but they would. You would make an awesome girlfriend.” he tries to reassure you.
You don’t want any guy.
“You’re not making me feel better.”
“What am I supposed to do, then? Agree with the bullshit you’re saying about yourself? Because that’s not fucking happening.”
“What I want you to say…you can’t.”
“Try me. Tell me.”
You just look at him. He doesn’t get it. He isn’t saying it because he doesn’t feel the same. This realization makes you feel like you’re crumpling. You look at him, defeated. If you have to tell him, you know he would only say it to make you feel better, not because he actually wants to. That. That’s what hurts the most. He would say it because you’re his best friend…but you don’t want to be.
“...are you going to try and get back together with Yujin?”
He pauses. He thinks about it for a second. “Right now…I don’t know. I guess a part of me wants to try still. Does that make me shitty?” He’s not sure why he does. Yujin is the first girl he’s ever told he loved…and he doesn’t say it often. Maybe he’s like you, in a way. He doesn’t really like saying stuff like that. It felt weird when he said it. But he thinks that’s just because he’s never said it before.
“Why would I?”
“I feel like an asshole for even considering it after everything you’ve told me-”
“She’s the one you love.”
“I’m not so sure about that.” he says, truthfully. He just needs to think. He just needs one damn second to think.
“Then let me make it clear: be with her. From my perspective, she's the one you want. What I told you, how I so stupidly cried in front of you, that doesn't matter. I told you this earlier: you should've chosen her. So just, make up with her tomorrow or whatever and be with her.” you swallow. “...but I can't be your friend.”
He sees you giving up. He hears it. He hates it. His mind is running a thousand miles per minute, he can’t fucking think and it’s pissing him off. “It’s not that easy. I can’t just ‘choose’ between the two of you. I’m confused, I just…I want to be with whoever makes me happy.”
He’s always been happy with you. Sure, you two fought, but you always got over it. You make him happy. So goddamn happy. But he’s scared. He just gave nearly four years of his life to Yujin…what if it’s because he does love her?
“That’s her.”
“How are you so sure it’s not you?”
“I know.”
He groans in frustration. “So, I have to choose between the two of you?”
You. He chooses you. He’s not sure about the rest of it, but all he knows is that he chooses you. Four years with Yujin doesn’t compare to the years you and him have had together. Nothing else matters. You. Just you.
“Just be with her.”
“What if I want to be with you?”
He hasn’t thought about it. Maybe he chooses you only as a best friend. What if he doesn’t choose you for love? …does he love you? He recalls the teasing from classmates when you guys were younger, but he's never really given any thought to it possibly becoming real. Does he love you the same way he loves Yujin? Does he even love Yujin? He doesn’t know…he just doesn’t know.
“You don’t.”
“And what makes you so sure that I choose Yujin over you? What makes you so sure you’re ‘not enough’ for me?”
“...because you would’ve chosen me first.”
“I can still choose you.”
You sigh, “You're making this complicated. You know she's the one you love, stop feeling bad for me like I'm some lost puppy and just admit it. I don't want your pity and I certainly don't want you to say you ‘choose me’ because you're confusing your pity for feelings. Stop saying I'm this great girl and stop saying any guy would be lucky to have me, that makes me feel worse. So just make up with Yujin and get back with her. Reassure her that you love her because you do and tell her I won't be a problem anymore because you and I aren't anything anymore. Problem solved.”
Is this really what you believed? Is this really what you thought? He just needed some time, he can’t think. He doesn’t know what to think anymore. You were speaking as if it was impossible for him to love you, but what if he does? How is he supposed to know? How did he know with Yujin? He’s questioning whether he even loved her since he can’t even compare how he feels about you with whatever he felt with her. He just knows it’s stronger. But stronger in what way? He sees how you’re looking at him and he realizes the only way for him to succeed in making you feel better–which is what he truly wants–is to just listen to you. He doesn’t want to. But he wants to see you be happy, even if it means he isn’t.
“Are you really sure this is what you want me to do?” he barely asks, the words leaving his mouth without any fervor, as if he never wanted to utter them in the first place. As if he doesn’t want to hear your answer; see you walk out of his life.
You don’t answer him. You just look at him before walking past him. You hold your breath, knowing that once you exhale, you’re going to start sobbing. You felt so lonely. So lonely. You’ve always had him…and then you lost him to Yujin…and now, you’ve lost him for good.
He doesn’t turn around to look at you as you walk away, because he knows if he does, he will run after you and that clearly isn’t what you want. You want to let him go, at least that’s how he understands it. He doesn’t want that. He wants you. He knows that much, he knows he needs you. He’s not sure how things will look without you now. He never thought it would be like this, but here he is. …why does this feel so much worse than when Yujin walked away from him? Why does this hurt more than his actual breakup? The reason is one he doesn’t want to admit. He realizes the answer and he refuses to let it grow to fruition. He doesn’t know why it took him until now to figure it out, but he’ll realize that later. He wanted time…now, he’s got it.
-
Deja vu. That’s what this all feels like. Here Sunghoon was, again, at another stupid frat party around midnight. Here he was, again, with Yujin. He took your advice, he decided to apologize and get back together with her, and these past few months without you have felt like torture. Even using torture to describe it seems too dull. He has thought about nothing but you. He’s heard around campus about people you’ve hooked up with, but he doesn’t feed into it. As he stands here with Yujin at this godforsaken party, all he can feel is regret. He leans against a wall as Yujin talks with her friends and he practically chugs his drink. He doesn’t even want to leave the party because he doesn't think it's worth to waste any of his wants on anything but you. You make up all of his desires and he wants nothing more than for you to be back into his life. He finishes the rest of his drink and to his surprise, he does see you. He stands up straighter as he looks at you, but feels like his insides are on fire when he realizes you’re making out with Sungchan. On the couch. On the couch, you are making out with Sungchan. On the couch, Sungchan is running his hands along your hips and waist. On the couch, you let him.
You would be lying if you said you didn’t miss Sunghoon. A part of you went missing the night you walked away from him. You’ve seen him around campus with Yujin and eventually, it finally felt like you were over it all. Over him. You wouldn’t say you’ve been getting around quite frequently, but you won’t lie when you say that you did get with some guys to help get over him. It didn’t work. But you won’t admit to that. To you, at least, you’re over it. Over him. Sungchan helped a bit with some of the lonely nights, but you two aren’t anything serious. He’s not into that sort of thing and, hey, neither are you…so this is fine. He doesn’t lie to you about how he feels or what he wants and for that, you’re grateful. Although, you do have to admit, making out with him feels boring. Being with him feels boring. It’s not fun like it used to be…and even then, you aren’t completely sure it was even fun in the first place. Whatever, you’ll get into it at some point.
Sunghoon watches, now it really feels like deja vu. Is he dreaming? Or…is this him getting a second chance? Is this when he can finally pull you away from Sungchan and be there for you? Finally tell you how he feels? How he felt the whole time…? Suddenly, his spirits are slightly lifted, that is, until Yujin crosses her arms and scoffs before shoving him. Sunghoon is surprised and turns his attention towards her. Some people look at them, but Yujin doesn’t care, she just looks at Sunghoon, furious.
“Do you even want me to be your girlfriend?”
Maybe honesty wouldn’t be best right now. “I do…”
“Then stop looking at her.”
“Let’s…not make a scene.” he says, trying to calm her down.
“Just be honest for once: do you love me or her?”
He doesn’t know how to answer. He knows his answer, he’s had months to figure it out. But…you made yourself clear. You were done with each other. He sighs. “Can I get a moment to figure it out?” he asks, honestly a bit surprised he didn’t just cave and reassure her.
Yujin frowns and scoffs. “Let me ask you this, then. Do you wish that you were making out with her?”
He looks back at you and Sungchan, seeing him whisper something to you and you giggling before he kisses you again. He looks back at Yujin. “Yeah.” he swallows, gathering all of his courage. “But, that sounds…awful. It’s like you want me to admit I regret getting back together with you or something-”
“Do you?”
“Yes.” he answers without hesitation. He feels all of his muscles tense up. Did he really just say that? Well…it’s the truth, but he never thought he would say it. He feels…better.
Yujin quickly squashes that by slapping him, “We’re done.” she says before storming out, her friends following. Sure, the slap hurt, but as Sunghoon looks back at you and Sungchan…the pain from the slap seems so insignificant in comparison.
You decide to tell Sungchan you’re getting a drink, so you get up from the couch and go into the kitchen. You pour yourself a drink and once you do, you walk to the backyard and take a seat on the patio.
Sunghoon figures you want to be alone…but finds himself following you outside anyway. He walks over to you cautiously. You and him have spoken consistently for practically your whole lives, but he finds himself struggling to even say a simple sentence or ask a question. The time you’ve spent apart was multiple days…too many fucking days in his opinion. He can’t stand it. “Can I sit here?” he asks, referencing the spot beside you. You shrug as you take a sip of your drink. He feels relieved, baby steps, right? He takes a seat beside you and thinks for a moment on how to keep the conversation going. “So…what were you telling Sungchan?” …has he lost the ability to socialize or something because why was this the question he asks? He bites his bottom lip a bit in frustration at himself.
“Spying on me?” you tease as you extend your cup, offering him some.
Sunghoon chuckles softly and shakes his head. Hearing your voice for the first time in months makes him remember just how much he’s missed you. He feels like everything in his life is restored and he smiles a bit. “You guys were all over each other on the couch, is it really weird for me to wonder?”
You shrug, “I mean, just typical flirting and dirty talk or whatever. Why?”
He feels his breath catch in his throat. “Dirty talk”?...what the fuck? “Um…no reason…I guess I was just…curious or something.” he mumbles.
“Are you here with Yujin?” you ask as you take another sip of your drink.
He shakes his head. “Well, not anymore. She broke up with me so…I’m alone now.” he realizes how that might’ve come off. “Alone here now…not…me alone altogether…or anything.” he cringes and looks away from you, feeling completely stupid.
“What? Why did she break up with you?”
“She…saw me…looking at you and Sungchan…so she broke up with me.” he says, not really wanting to say the other stuff from the argument. You laugh in response and he frowns. “Don’t laugh.”
You nudge his shoulder, “It’s okay. If she broke up with you for that dumb of a reason, her loss.” You say as you take another sip.
He smiles slightly. It feels like old times. It feels like he has you back. It feels like you want him back. “Yeah, you’re probably right. It’s probably best I don’t have her constantly being suspicious about me and you.”
“Especially since we haven’t talked in months.”
He feels caught off guard by your blunt statement. Sure, it’s true…but it sounds like you didn’t miss him. “Yeah…we haven’t talked in a while.” You just take another sip of your drink and he looks back at you. “I’ve missed you.” He waited for you to say something back, but you didn’t. “I’ve um…missed talking to you like before. Like, before…everything got complicated and stuff-”
“I know what you meant.”
He nods his head a bit, everything now feeling awkward. “So…what have you been up to? Anything interesting happen?”
“Nope.”
“Really? Nothing? Nothing at all?”
“Yup” you say as you take another drink.
“So…for the past few months, you’ve done absolutely nothing interesting?” he asks, his tone being more lighthearted and joking to try and diffuse the tension.
“No offense, but I’m not really looking to ‘catch up’ with you.”
Sunghoon feels his heart stop for a moment, but he tries to play it off. “Okay, ouch.” he laughs nervously, “So you’re not even remotely interested in talking with me?”
You shrug, “I dunno. These past few months without you, I’ve kinda just been doing my own thing, I guess.”
Your response left him feeling worthless. Like, he didn’t even mean a single thing to you before. Which, he knows isn’t true…but you sound like you mean it. “So, you haven’t missed me at all? Not even talking to me?”
“At first, yeah. But don’t worry, I’m not in love with you anymore.”
“...you’re not…in love with me anymore…?” he asks as he feels his blood run cold. You just shake your head and continue drinking from your cup. His heart sinks immediately. He feels small; insignificant. His mind jumps back to Sungchan and he frowns. “Are you in love with him now?”
“Him?”
“Sungchan.”
“Eh,” you shrug, “we’re not dating, just casual, I guess.”
“So, you’re not exclusive with him?”
“No.”
“And you’re okay with that?”
“Yeah.”
He feels himself growing jealous and frustrated. How could you give yourself to someone who doesn’t love you? Sunghoon feels upset, realizing he unintentionally did the same thing, but still, not to this extent. He knows you. He knows you don’t want this…hopefully. But he sure as hell knows that you don’t deserve this.
“That’s ridiculous. How can you be committed to this?”
“I’m not committed.”
He groans, “That’s…not what I meant. What do you two even get out of this?”
You shrug, “Why do you care? I get you’re a relationship guy even though you’ve only been serious with one girl, but don’t shit on me and what I choose to do.”
The way you spoke got under his skin. “I care because I happen to care about the people around me. In case you haven’t noticed, I care about you.” But you just roll your eyes. “Don’t roll your eyes. I’m being serious. Why do you feel like this isn’t worth talking about?”
“Because we aren’t friends. We aren’t anything. I don’t need your input.”
It feels like you’ve slapped him in the face, and this time, it fucking stings. “What do you mean we aren’t friends? We grew up together, how the hell are we not friends?”
“Are you stupid?”
“Am I stupid?” he asks, offended and frustrated. He was starting to lose his patience. “No. I’m not. I still consider you as my friend. We grew up together, went to the same schools, hung out every damn day, how is none of that relevant?”
“We haven’t spoken in months.”
“So what?” he asks, feeling as though your friendship suddenly means less than nothing to you, somehow.
“I told you that night that I wasn’t going to be your friend anymore.”
He freezes. He knows. He also knows you don’t just say shit without it meaning anything. He knows you aren’t friends anymore, but he doesn’t want that. He doesn’t want you to be nothing to each other. He thought that if, maybe, he admitted he still sees you as his friend, you would admit the same. But you don’t. And now he feels that same empty feeling. “So…you’re just fine with letting us go without a second thought?”
You look at him, “Do you not remember anything from that night? Of course if fucking hurt; I was in love with you.”
“So it does matter.”
You sigh, “It doesn’t matter anymore; that was a long time ago.” you say as you take another sip.
He looks at you for a moment, feeling like his heart has become a punching bag and you were just taking any hit you could. Was this really the same person he grew up with? That he… “How could it not matter anymore? We used to mean the world to each other…how can that just…be…over?”
You look at him, “Because I had to get over you.”
“It’s not that easy. I spent everyday thinking about you. Everyday.”
“Why?”
“Because I love you!” He thought your question was so redundant, he honestly didn’t even realize what he said at first.
“But…” you sit there, stunned. He finally said what you wanted him to say for so long, even if it was with a frustrated tone, still…it counted. “What about Yujin?”
“She…she doesn’t matter. You do. She always suspected I was in love with you-”
“Well, this is news to me.”
He deadpans. “Are you being fucking serious? I get I never said it before, but…” he pauses; he sees what you mean. “Okay…but…you never once thought it was possible that I love you?”
“No. Because that night when I told you that I was in love with you, you just kept saying I was your best friend. You’re so full of it.”
“I’m not full of it! I just…for fucks sake, I just didn’t know. I thought…I don’t know, I thought maybe for you it was just passing, or something, I don’t know what I thought I just…I don’t know.”
“Right. So as I stood there, crying my eyes out as I told you how much I loved you, you thought it was one sided.” you say as you roll your eyes.
“I…” he feels like he did that night, like he can’t think. “I just didn’t know, maybe something was holding me back, I don’t know.”
“I know why.”
He looks at you, relieved, thankful that you understand what he means. “You do?”
“Of course you didn’t want to admit to that. How embarrassing for you to have a crush on one of the school’s biggest sluts.”
He frowns. “That’s not what I mean. You honestly think it’s embarrassing for me to like you?”
“Exactly. And you knew that. I don’t blame you, no guy wants their girlfriend to be a whore.” You take another sip of your drink and you look at him. “Look, I’m not mad. I got over it and I honestly don’t care anymore. I know what I am and I know that until we graduate, that’s all I’ll probably be. But it doesn’t matter. Yujin breaking up with you not too long ago was dumb, you’re a really great guy, but you’ll find someone else.” You take another sip, “I should probably head back in and find Sungchan.”
He felt anger wash over him. Not because you don’t believe him about being in love with you. Not because you were going to Sungchan. But because of the fact that you believe the things you say about yourself. You’re so special, so goddamn special, and Sunghoon is so scared as he realizes he may be too late.
“And what if I don’t want to find someone else? What if I don’t want anyone else but you?”
You look at him for a moment. “Do you remember how you would talk about Yujin with me? You may not remember everything you said, but I remember it all and I remember how you looked as you said it. You talked about her like she was the most special and most beautiful girl in the world. You had this smile that you only had with her…” you pause for a moment, “You may say you have feelings for me…but they're not like the ones you had for her, and that’s okay. I don’t want you to feel bad because you deserve to be happy, but you also deserve to find another girl that makes you talk and feel that same way…and I know that’s not me.”
You’re so wrong. You’re so fucking wrong and it was pissing him off. He wishes he just figured this out earlier. He wishes that he asked you out instead. He wishes that he told you he loves you that night. He wishes he kissed you. He wishes he held you and didn’t let go. He swallows, “You remember everything I said?” he asks, slightly surprised to hear that. Honestly, he doesn’t even remember what he said. Not anymore.
“Of course I do…I wanted nothing more than for it to be me.” you say quietly as you take a sip and sigh. “But like I said, water under the bridge.”
He feels tears begin to form. “Why did we have to grow apart? Why didn’t you just talk to me? Just one damn word. Something. I didn’t want to lose you.”
“I can’t be your friend.”
“Why not?”
You look at him for a long moment, just staying quiet. “...I’m only going to say this once…but if I stayed your friend, I would just keep hurting myself…I would still love you.”
He stays quiet for a while. Even the loud music and chatter from the people inside seemed to drown out as he looked at you; you’re all that matters; you’re all that deserves his attention. “...did it hurt when we would talk everyday?”
You sigh softly and shake your head. “Not until you started dating Yujin. Before that, everything was fine. But once she happened…it hurt like hell.”
“Why didn’t you tell me?”
“I told you. I couldn’t do that to you, you were happy.”
“I would have wanted to know. I would have wanted to be there for you…”
You laugh a little, “No, that’s weird.” You shake your head and still laugh a little, “It’s fine, I’m over it.”
“It’s not weird. It’s not okay for you to act like everything is fine.” he says, softly.
“Why are you trying to rehash this? There’s no point. Or do you like to hear about how I used to love you and it gives you some sort of ego boost or something?” you ask, not wanting to dive back into this…not again. He shakes his head, but he sighs. What is the point? You aren’t believing him and you’ve said it yourself…you’re over him. You stand up and his eyes follow you, “I’m gonna go find Sungchan. Later.” you say, not really meaning the ‘later’ part, but nonetheless, you walk away and all he can do is watch you leave…again.
He heads back into the party, wanting to find solace in getting batshit drunk or something, but he continues to torture himself by watching you dance with Sungchan. His eyes only focus on you, sure, he’s jealous and pissed off that you’re with Sungchan, but he only sees you. Sees how you move and he finds himself wishing you were dancing with him.
Sungchan pulls you closer, just whispering sweet nothings in your ear and you feel his hands grab your ass. You giggle a little and try to enjoy your time with him as he starts kissing your neck. You laugh softly as you dance with him and, unfortunately for Sunghoon, he’s bearing witness to it all. His hand practically crushes his red solo cup as fury ignites within him when he watches what Sungchan is doing. That should be him. Not that he would be so…vulgar with his actions, but it should still be him instead. He sees Sungchan whisper something to you as he takes your hand and starts taking you upstairs.
As he watched the two of you making your way upstairs, his whole body shook and trembled in rage. Every step that the two of you took together enraged him. He hated the way you casually held his hand and how he casually walked you up the stairs. He hated how he acted as if he had every right to touch you like that. He hated the fact that you were both so comfortable with one another at this point. He hated the fact that he was leading you away to his room…
You were so focused on following Sungchan, you were surprised to feel a tug on your other hand once you reached the top of the stairs. Both Sungchan and you stop and you turn to see Sunghoon holding your other hand.
Sunghoon felt at ease, like he was grounded when he felt your hand in his. This made him more confident as he tugged you towards him, wanting you away from Sungchan. This pisses Sungchan off and he scoffs as he looks at Sunghoon.
“The hell?” Sungchan says, not in the mood for any games. He tugs the hand he was holding, pulling you back towards him, but you find yourself only focused on Sunghoon as your heart starts to beat faster.
Sunghoon pulls you back towards him, his grip on your hand tightening. “Back off.” he says as he glares at Sungchan.
“You back off.” Sungchan says as he tugs you back towards him.
Sunghoon realized that you were just being tugged around, so he stopped, but he kept holding your hand. “Let go of her.”
“You let go of her.” He looks at you, “Who the hell is this guy?” Sungchan asks, annoyed.
“Someone who actually loves her instead of using her.”
You look at Sunghoon, surprised to hear him say that. Sure, he said he loved you earlier…but this time when he said it, he said it like it was what he meant to say; what he wanted to say.
Sungchan laughs. “You love her?”
Sunghoon glares at him. “Yes. I love her. Now back off.”
Sungchan scoffs and puts his arm around you. “Tell you what, bud, you can have her when I’m done.” Sungchan winks as he pulls you towards him.
Sunghoon feels enraged. This asshole was acting so entitled, acting like he won this argument when Sunghoon knew damn well he wasn’t giving up. The fact that he had the nerve to call him “bud” too made Sunghoon want to throw him down the flight of fucking stairs. How he treated you was disgusting, talking about you like that in front of you. Sunghoon tugged you towards him one last time and Sungchan rolled his eyes.
“Whatever.” Sungchan looks at you, “You know where my room is.” he says as he winks at you before walking away.
Sunghoon grimaces as Sungchan leaves, but feels better once he’s gone. The whole time, you were just looking at Sunghoon and you feel as though your heart is beating out of your chest as he holds your hand. After what he said. After all of this. He meets your gaze and he looks at you in a much more gentle manner.
“You deserve so much more…” he whispers, his breath lightly brushing along your face since you’re so close together. “I’m sorry. I’m so fucking sorry-”
“Stop.”
“No.” he says as he lets go of your hand and uses it instead to gently cup your face. “I wasn’t lying. You are all I’ve thought about for these past few months and you’re all I can ever think about. I’ve missed you every single damn second of the day and I’m sorry I was too scared to say it all before. I love you. And all this time, I’ve just thought about what you mean to me and the answer is everything; you mean everything to me. ...that seems like such a vague thing to say now that I say it out loud.” he chuckles softly, “But everything means nothing if you’re not with me. Eating, sleeping, breathing, blinking, are all pointless if I can’t spend one goddamn second with you. I’m not embarrassed of you and I only realized that night when you left that I’ve always been in love with you. Always. What I felt with Yujin is all meaningless when I compare it to how I feel about you. I love you. It was never her. Not for even a millisecond. You asked me if I would put myself through pain just to see her happy and I told you yes. I lied. I thought that was what I would do, but I realized I actually did that with you. I let you walk away because that’s what you wanted. I didn’t want that, god-” he takes a sharp inhale as he rests his forehead on yours, “It’s always been you…and I’m so sorry I never said it until now. I’m so sorry I put you through all of that shit. I’m so sorry, but please…” he whispers as he looks into your eyes, all of his focus only on you. “I love you.”
You feel your breath hitch slightly and you feel so tempted just to kiss him, but you hold yourself back. You smile a little bit and pull away slightly, feeling relieved. “...I need to smoke. You want one?” you ask as you take his hand, going into an empty bedroom.
He closes the door behind the two of you as you walk over and sit on the bed, opening the window beside it. He sits beside you as you take out your pack and he smiles a bit. “Yeah, I do.” he says as you hand him one. He watches as you light yours and then you light his for him. You both sit silently for a moment as you smoke, it being a comfortable silence until he speaks. “Thank you.” he says, mainly for lighting his cigarette, but he does want it to apply to you not leaving him again.
“I forgive you.” you say after a moment.
“You do?” he asks as he takes a drag and looks at you.
“Yeah.” you say as you take another drag yourself. “But you’ve got to get better at saying how you feel.” you tease.
He scoffs playfully and nudges your arm. “Says you.” he mumbles as he continues to smoke.
You laugh softly and shrug. “We’ll work on it.” you say before exhaling your smoke and he nods his head a bit as you both look out of the window for a moment. You glance at him and inhale from your cigarette before gently pulling him towards you. He turns his head to look at you and you kiss him gently, shotgunning the smoke slowly into his mouth.
His eyes widen a bit as his heart beats rapidly. He closes his eyes as he inhales, letting the smoke slowly fill his lungs while he leans forward to kiss you back, indulging in the feeling of your lips on his even if it wasn’t an actual kiss. After blowing out the smoke, you break the kiss and watch as he exhales the smoke. He does it slowly, feeling as though his lips are tingling, begging to meet yours again. He smirks a bit after he exhales all of the smoke and looks at you. “Damn…that was good.” he whispers as he blushes a bit.
You grin, taking another drag, “I’ve missed you.”
He takes a drag as well as smiles softly. “I’ve missed you, too.” It goes quiet, but this time, a comfortable silence as you two smoke. He blows some smoke out of the window and looks back at you. “Do you think…we could give this another shot?”
You follow suit and blow some smoke out of the window before looking at him. “Our friendship or…something more this time?”
“Something more. Both, hopefully.” he smirks a bit as he says this, taking another drag.
You smirk a little back and chuckle softly, “I really want that.”
“So do I.” he whispers as his eyes lock onto yours. He smiles softly, “We’re going to be official.”
He reaches for your hand and carefully interlaces his fingers with yours. You take another drag as you smile shyly. “Good…” you say, softly.
Your fingers seem to fit with his perfectly; everything about you is perfect and it was things like this that make him realize it all the more. You hold hands as you smoke silently, both feeling a fluttering excitement in your stomachs as your relationship dynamic shifts to one that you both have been longing for before you even realized it yourselves. He glances at you as he exhales some smoke.
“Good? Wow…I was expecting some more passion out of that.” he teases, gently squeezing your hand.
You laugh before finishing your cigarette and putting it out. You turn your body a bit to face him, “What about…fucking incredible?”
He laughs loudly at your new choice of phrasing. He calms down after a moment, “That’s more like it.” he says with a grin before smoking his cigarette again. His gaze lingers on you as he watches you smile at his reaction. Stunning. He leans in, letting go of your hand, placing his left hand beside you on the bed as his lips meet yours, kissing you.
You don’t waste a single second, kissing him back immediately as your hand makes its way to the back of his head, your fingers threading with his hair as you push yourself slightly forward, pressing your lips against his more. He inhales sharply as he moves his left arm around your waist, pulling you closer, desperately. He puts out his cigarette and discards it, using his other arm to wrap around you as well as he pulls you onto his lap. You part your legs, straddling his lap as you grin a bit into the kiss, both of your hands using their fingers to gently tug on the ends of his soft hair. You feel yourself fill with excitement, the fact that this is really happening after every inch of your body has desired this exact moment makes you feel restless.
Sunghoon runs his hands up and down your thighs, squeezing them gently, before moving them up to your hips, and then your waist. His hands suddenly felt so big against your skin, his fingers sending shivers throughout your whole body anywhere they touch. He opens his mouth slightly more and you take this as a sign to slip your tongue into it. He grins, this time, and he pulls you closer to him by gripping your waist; your bodies now pressed tightly against each other. He moves his hands to cup your face and you move yours to rest against his chest, your fingers tightly gripping his shirt in an attempt to somehow kiss him deeper. His tongue glides across yours as he kisses you with increasing desperation. The need for you grows every second that passes, he has to kiss every inch of you, he has to make you his, he has to make you feel loved; the only thoughts devouring his mind at this very moment consisted of nothing but you and his need to ensure you only ever want him.
The kiss becomes sloppy, both of your lips becoming covered in one another, and you feel yourself craving more. So much more. You bite his bottom lip a little, testing to see if this will make him decide to take initiative, resulting in him gasping softly and releasing a low moan. He liked it. He liked it a lot. He moves his hands back to your waist, pushing you down against his lap and his jaw loosens a bit as he loses his breath, feeling you finally press against his erection. You moan softly, enjoying the feeling of some sort of contact where you desperately needed it the most and it felt so good knowing he wanted you just as much as you wanted him. He couldn’t take it anymore, he had to have you.
One of his hands grips your thigh and his other arm goes back to wrapping around your waist as he picks you up a bit and lays you back against the bed, not once breaking the kiss; at this point, kissing you has become his oxygen supply. Feeling your hands on him is the only thing keeping him alive. His lips part from yours only to kiss along your jaw, just below your ear, and down to your neck. You gasp softly and your eyelids flutter closed as you relish in the feeling of his soft lips kissing your skin. He takes one of his hands and uses it to move some of your hair out of the way, placing it on the back of your head, pulling your hair softly to move your head back so he has more room to work with on your neck. You let out a soft moan, feeling him leave open mouthed kisses on every single inch of your skin, him making sure he doesn’t miss a single spot.
He opens his eyes a bit and looks at you, to see how he’s making you feel. He watches as your lips part slightly as you take in small gasps of air, as if he leaves you utterly breathless; you’ve never looked more beautiful. He watches to see what spot of your neck when he kisses it that you seem to like the most. Once he gets to a certain spot and watches you bite your bottom lip a bit, he smirks slightly against your skin and sucks gently on the area. His tongue laps the spot a bit as he sucks and nibbles on it; this was his spot now. You moan softly and you feel your breath slightly catch in your throat as he leaves a hickey. He leaves a few soft pecks on the spot a little after he’s left his mark and he smiles a bit to himself.
You feel the warmth of his body pull away from yours and your eyes open as you look at him. The moon shined a bit through the window, the light falling beautifully on him as he looked at you with a slightly flushed face. He looked back at you, seeing you laying on this bed, all for him, he felt like he was going crazy. He sits on his knees between your legs as his hands run along your thighs; he just keeps looking at you, admiring all of you. You lay there, looking at him, feeling your body become hot as he looks at you through hooded eyes, as if you leave him in a trance. Your breathing picks up in speed as he runs his hands painfully slow along your thighs and as much as you want to pull him back towards you, you feel as though you’re frozen.
He takes a slow, deep breath, as his left hand travels up to gently take your right hand. He holds it up softly, separating your fingers with his as he loosely holds your hand, his gaze now focusing on your hands. He raises your hand up and leans in, raising it to his mouth. He softly plants his lips on your fingertips, kissing them softly, up to your knuckles, trailing his lips to the back of your hand, then gently turning it to kiss along the palm of your hand. He closes his eyes as he kisses down your arm--slowly--and gently lays your arm back at your side as he kisses up to your shoulder. His hands move to the hem of your short dress, slowly sliding it up, you raising your hips to help him, and he stops, leaving it bunched around your waist as he goes back to kissing along your shoulder. He gently pushes the strap of your dress down your shoulder as he focuses on kissing your body, moving along your collarbone. He breathes deeply, pushing the other strap out of the way as he leaves open mouthed kisses on your left shoulder, down your arm, his hands gently holding it up as he kisses up to your wrist. You watch him, feeling as if your body is constantly shivering, still dressed (albeit, your dress is pushed up), yet feeling completely exposed. His hand envelopes over your left hand as he kisses your palm like he cherishes your entire being, the way he looks is as if he’s wanted to do this his whole life.
He kisses your fingers, knuckles, and fingertips, opening his eyes slowly as he lets go of your arm gently. He moves his hands back to your waist, pulling your dress up more and you sit up, realizing your body is shaking, and he kisses your forehead before pulling your dress off carefully, like he’s afraid if he does it too fast, you’ll break. He lets the dress fall to the ground, the fabric hitting the hard wood floor just as softly as he lets it go. It’s as if the room is silent, no muffled music from downstairs, no rolling of tires from the occasional cars passing on the streets, no soft wind hitting the curtains, nothing except the quiet breaths escaping from his and your lips. He feels his erection become even more painfully hard as he looks at you, and he swallows, honestly trying not to let out a moan just at the sight of you. His breath stifles a little as he places his hand on the small of your back, steadying you as he leans back in, kissing the top of your chest. He feels himself growing more desperate, desperate to feel every inch of your skin on his lips, on his fingertips.
He breathes in sharply as he presses his face more into your chest, his lips sloppily kissing along your chest as his need for you grows. His tongue trails along your skin and he shudders, his hands becoming shaky as he holds your waist, all his focus practically on making out with your chest. A low moan elicits from him and from the way he was kissing your chest with such desperation made you moan softly in response, one of your bra straps falling a little off your shoulder from his movements. It’s as if he senses it and just decides to unclasp your bra, still trying to let it slide off of you slowly and hold himself back, but once he sees you take it off, your bare chest exposed, he feels himself get so close to cumming in his pants. He gently lays you back on the bed, wasting no time, however, to wrap his lips around one of your nipples. Your breath hitches and you moan as he releases his desperation. Kissing, sucking, and fondling your breasts, small whimpers coming from him as he feels elated to finally be doing this. Spit covers your chest almost instantly as he licks and sucks, kneading your breasts, moaning as the soft flesh squeezes and molds beneath his hands. And it’s only until he feels his breathing becoming quick, his dick aching in his pants, is when he stops. He pulls away slightly, his hair slightly covering his eyes as he stares at them, his trembling fingers squeezing and spreading his spit along them, his thumbs pressing and circling your nipples, and you feel as if ripples just went throughout your entire body.
You gently push his hair away from his face and he goes back to kissing along your stomach, down to your panties. You can feel momentarily the thin layer of sweat covering his forehead when you push his hair away, running your fingers through his locks and he whines softly against your skin, his hands gripping your sides and finally moving to the edge of your panties. You wait in anticipation, expecting him to take them off, so you raise your hips slightly, but he pulls away. You pout–only slightly–as you look at him with a confused expression. He smiles sweetly, as if he’s not the one that caused you to quite literally soak through your panties. He’s noticed, god, he’s noticed, but it takes everything in him not to behave like some animal. So, with that, he moves his hands down to your feet, slowly taking off your shoes for you before setting them on the ground. He moves back a little, leaning down to kiss along your leg, stopping at your knee, before moving to do the same thing to the other leg, but this time, he kisses up your thigh, leaving open mouthed kisses on the inner part of your thigh, gently nipping at your skin, and up to your hip. He gazes at you through his eyelashes as he moves to kiss along the other thigh, closing his eyes as he moans deeply against your skin, his tongue running along your skin.
He takes in a shaky, deep breath, and you feel your whole body become stiff once you feel his warm breath scatter so deliciously on your core. He gently places his hand over your sopping panties and your breath hitches, your whole body feeling grateful for some sort of contact. His brows furrowed as he slowly rubs his middle finger along your clothed slit, a low groan escaping his lips as he feels even more of your wetness seep through the fabric as he pushes into it. His mind feels hazy; he has to taste you. He takes his hand away, licking his middle finger and he feels as if his whole body exploded. He moans quietly to himself, before gripping your thighs and sticking his tongue out, licking a slow, long stripe between your clothed folds to your clit. Your eyes roll back as you gasp and moan. His fingers dig into the skin of your thighs as he feels himself lose all sense of sanity. He wanted nothing more than to take his time, but fuck, he can’t do it anymore.
His lips instantly latch around your clothed clit, sucking and lapping his tongue as he starts to subconsciously rut his hips against the mattress. His saliva soaks your panties entirely as he presses his tongue more firmly, causing you to moan louder, gasping, as your hand makes its way to his hair, your fingers tangling in it. He moans and pulls away only a little before diving back in, pushing your panties to the side with his face as he makes out between your folds. His jaw is working overtime, his tongue lapping and picking up as much of you as you can give, His nose bumps against your clit as he loses himself in your taste, eating you out like a madman. He groans and moans into you, his hip movements stuttering as he licks all the way back up to your clit, moving his right hand off of your thigh before pushing his middle and ring finger into you, making sure to rub them between your folds before he does. He sucks and licks your clit, moaning and whimpering as he pushes his fingers in and out of you, not stopping until his knuckles prevent him.
You moan his name, gripping his hair, pushing his face against your clit more as your legs shake and you cum, moaning his name. He whimpers and the way you taste sends him over the edge as he feels himself cum in his pants, his jaw falling slack a bit, and he pulls his fingers out, desperate to lick them clean. You let go of his hair, trying to catch your breath and he sits up, his face slick and covered in you, and he tugs your panties off. You look at him, watching as he undresses himself and you feel your body become light as he reveals more and more of himself to you. His bare chest, his abs, god, his biceps, you were about ready to start touching yourself at the sight, desperate for him, but you managed to stay put.
He feels his ego boost a little bit, watching how you look at him, examining his body as if he is some work of art. He’s going to give you everything he knows you deserve and that thought alone makes him smirk. You notice as he takes off his underwear the wet patch from his prior release, making you grin a bit. He finally lets his cock out, it still being painfully hard despite him having cummed already, and you gaze at it. You feel yourself clench around nothing, wanting him so desperately to fill you up and he sees it. He smiles innocently, as if you both aren’t completely naked and horny before he grabs a cigarette and lights it. He takes a drag as he spreads the precum spilling from his tip all along his length and you watch his every movement, honestly feeling your mouth water at the sight. You sit up and he motions his head to the window as the cigarette sits between his lips.
You turn and face the window, propping your forearms against the windowsill as you look outside, the cool breeze honestly feeling nice against your flushed, hot skin. You feel his presence shift behind you as he takes another drag. He sighs softly, looking at yourself propped like this, he places his free hand on your hip, lining himself up with you. He moves that hand and gently brushes your hair softly to the side, exposing your back entirely, and you turn your head a bit to look back at him. He exhales some smoke and meets your gaze, gently brushing his fingers along your cheek.
“Relax…” he says before leaning to whisper in your ear, “and don’t be afraid to let the neighborhood know my name.” he says before kissing your cheek.
You feel your body shudder at his words and he holds the cigarette between his lips as he uses one hand to hold your hip, the other gripping his cock before he slides it up and down, teasingly, between your folds. You gasp softly and he smirks, pushing his tip against your clit and he hisses a little, more precum leaking from his tip. He guides his cock into you, needing to quickly grab his cigarette from his mouth due to his jaw falling slack as he bottoms out into you. Your fingers grip the edge of the windowsill, your jaw dropping as you feel him finally giving you what you want. You moan and become breathless. He takes another drag from his cigarette before moving his hand from your hip to your shoulder as he pulls his hips away and then thrusts himself back into you entirely.
He filled you up perfectly, and he was damn ready to cum just from the way it felt like you perfectly fit around him. So warm and so fucking wet. He thrusts in and out of you a few times, groaning as you moan, sounds of you coating his cock more and more each time he goes in and out of you. He takes a shaky inhale from his cigarette, his eyes rolling back a bit as he thrusts a bit faster, before taking the cigarette out of his mouth, gripping the back of your head, a handful of your hair between his fingers, as he pulls you up and turns your head towards him. You moan and whine looking at him as he kisses you, shotgunning you this time as he keeps a steady pace of thrusting into you. You felt like you were going to choke, but you inhale what he exhales and as he pulls away, you turn back and lean your forearms against the windowsill as you blow out the smoke, gasping afterwards and moaning his name.
“Good girl,” he groans and puts the cigarette out, putting both of his hands on your hips, thrusting faster. “Such a good girl.”
You moan at his praise and breathe quickly as all you can do is let out strings of long moans as you feel his cock press into you over and over, him somehow hitting every area that makes your knees weak and mind hazy. His fingers dig into your skin as his hips rapidly pound and slap against your ass, the sound of skin slapping becoming louder and louder. You moan his name loudly, and as a reward, he pushes further, you feeling his tip brush against your cervix and you gasp, moaning his name lewdly. He grunts, the way you just moaned his name almost made him cum automatically.
“Louder, sweetheart, come on.”
You gasp for air as he fucks you so goddamn good, and you try to arch your lower back a bit so he can go deeper. You moan his name as many times as he wants, whatever it takes for him to rut in and out of you faster, to which he obliged. His breathing becomes heavy and your legs shake as you throw your head back a bit, your jaw dropping as you let out a long moan, cum spreading all over his cock. He grunts and whimpers, wrapping his arms around your waist as his brows knit together, him leaning down and kissing your shoulder as he pumps you full of cum, a low moan coming from him and onto your shoulder. He moans your name softly as he lets out a few more shallow thrusts, making sure he gives you every last drop. You feel yourself shiver as the warm liquid pushes into you and you whine a little.
After a moment of him holding you close and staying inside of you, he kisses your shoulder softly again before pulling out and pulling away. He lays back onto the bed and you shudder as you feel his and your cum spilling out of you and trailing slowly down your inner thigh. He opens his arms a bit and you go to him, letting out a sigh as you rest your head on his chest and feeling content when his arms wrap around you. His hand slowly moves up and down your back before he kisses the top of your head. It’s silent for a while as you both lay there.
“So…we’re a thing now?” you ask, partly joking, but part of you was seriously asking.
He looks down at you and scoffs playfully. “After all of this, you still don’t get it?” he chuckles softly. “I want nobody but you.”
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Collision
TW/CW: Car accident, injuries.
Pairing: Evan Buckley x Diaz!Reader
You smiled to yourself as you walked beside Christopher, your nephew. You had watched him in the morning while your brother was working, and Carla was attending an appointment. You didn’t mind though, you absolutely adored him, and he enjoyed spending time with you.
You had an hour to kill before dropping him off to Carla, and heading off to work yourself, so you decided to swing by the station to have lunch with the team. It was quiet when you arrived, indicating the team were on a call. You took it upon yourself to make lunch for everybody, knowing it would be a relief to them when they got back. Chris was sat at the table on his tablet, in a world of his own, allowing you to focus on the food. You couldn’t help but smile to yourself as the sound of the shutters opening filled the station followed by heavy boots thudding against the floor as each firefighter jumped out of the truck. The footsteps got closer, the faint smell of smoke mixed with a familiar aftershave filled your nostrils and you instinctively lean back into the body that is now behind you as arms snake around your waist. “Isn’t this a nice surprise?”
You turn towards the voice, and smile, “Apparently, I can’t seem to stay away.” You lean up to kiss Buck, causing Chris to pull a disgusted face. This seemed to amuse Buck, and he kissed you again. Eddie appeared in the kitchen, and made his way over to his son, visibly happy to see him. “Come on guys, get a room.” You rolled your eyes playfully at your brothers comment, and pulled away from Buck.
You dished up the food for the team and took a seat, eager to hear about the call they had just been on. You listened intently as you ate, your complete focus on Buck as he spoke passionately about the call. Your heart warmed as you watched his face light up, he loved how much you genuinely enjoyed hearing about the calls, and how his day had gone. Chimney was the next to speak up, “It was a good call, except the part where Buck was playing hero and nearly got himself killed.” Bucks eyes widened and he turned to look at Chimney, giving him a look that immediately stopped him talking. Chimney, trying to help, began speaking again, “Don’t worry, it’s nothing out of the ordinary. It wasn’t any more dangerous than a simple call, the risk is always there. Besides, it was probably one of the safer times Buck tried to save the day, you should’ve seen him on the call last week.”
“Chim, stop talking.” Buck, who was now visibly on the spot, turned to face you. He studied your face, working out how to approach this. He opened his mouth to reassure you, but you beat him to it, “I thought we spoke about this…” Buck knew you understood that no day was guaranteed, and that saving people on calls was something he would always try to do, even if it put him at risk. He also knew that he had a habit of jumping the gun and putting himself in dangerous situations without thinking it through. “I’m sorry…”
You checked your watch, and stood up. “I just wish you’d be more careful, Buck.” Chris stood up and hugged Eddie goodbye, and you did the same. “Later bro.” You said goodbye to the team and walked back to the car with Chris by your side. The breeze hit you, and you took a deep breath. Maybe you were overreacting, maybe not but you just needed a moment. You helped Chris into the car and got in yourself, turning on the radio. The short ride to Carlas mostly consisted of Chris laughing as you sang along to the music, and the occasional conversation when Chris wasn’t overly engrossed in his phone. Carla was there to greet you when you pulled up on her drive, Chris was extremely excited and practically jumped out of the car to hug her. Carla gave you a hug, “Y/N, it’s so good to see you!” You smiled and hugged back, “It’s been a while, huh? Life has been hectic.” Carla laughs at this, “You’re telling me, your brother told me all about you and Buck. Moving in together? That’s a big step!”
“We were practically living together anyway, and if I’m being honest, Eddie is probably just relieved to have his couch back. I was starting to get on his nerves.” You explained to Carla, and she chuckled. “Well, I wish you all the best. I’m gonna get Chris inside, and I’ll let you run off to work. It was lovely seeing you.” You hug Chris goodbye and bid farewell to Carla before getting into your car and beginning your journey to your place of work. In front of you, the amber light turned to red and you stopped. You could see that traffic was beginning to build up on the other side of the junction, and you didn’t want to be late. You sighed, and made the decision to take an alternate route, so when the light turned green, you indicated and pulled out to begin taking your turning. You let out a sudden gasp before you could even properly register the car coming towards you. All you could do was attempt to brace for the impact, and so you did.
A loud crunching sound surrounded you, followed by the feeling of being thrown as your car was barrelled into. You closed your eyes tightly, scared of what was next. You didn’t have the courage to open them again until the car steadied. The first thing you could see was the airbag in front of you, despite not feeling it deploy moments before. You could smell the burning of the tyres, outside of the car, you could hear the panicked voices of bystanders, but all you could focus on was the blood that was now spread across your arms, unsure of where it was actually coming from. You weren’t in pain, at least you couldn’t feel any in that moment. Is that what shock feels like? You couldn’t think, but your eyes got heavy and you fought your hardest not to succumb to the darkness.
Back at the station, the call was only just coming in. The alarm blared throughout the station, alerting the team to the call. They were quick to jump into action, grabbing their gear and piling themselves into their assigned trucks. Eddie and Buck sat beside each other, speaking casually between themselves about what had happened earlier. “Just give her some time, she’ll come around. For her, two of the people she loves most are at risk everyday, you’ve gotta imagine it can’t be easy. It’s a risky job as it is, and when you put yourself into riskier situations without needing to, it decreases the chance of making it home at the end. She’s scared. Just talk to her.” Eddie attempted to reassure Buck, who was feeling terrible. He couldn’t shake the image of your face from his mind, the face that showed disappointment in his actions. Before Buck could respond, the truck halted and the team jumped out, ready to give help where needed. Buck stopped in his tracks as an all too familiar car was crushed before him. He tried not to panic, hoping that his suspicions were wrong. His eyes flicked to the number plate and his heart stopped. His feet were moving before his mind could catch up. He shouted your name, drawing Eddies attention. It took Eddie a few seconds to process what was happening. You had not long left the station, it couldn’t possibly be you. Right?
Buck arrived to your car first, nausea washed over him as he caught sight of your injured body. “Y/N? Hey, it’s me. I’m here.” You weren’t completely aware of what was happening, your eyes opened with a struggle. Your movements were weak as you turned your head to look at him. “Buck?” You spoke quietly, not completely aware of the situation at hand. “Don’t move, try and keep still.” He tried to remain as calm as he could, he didn’t want to scare you any more, he was terrified himself. Eddie ran right over to the car, his heart racing as he feared what he would find. His first instinct was to check the back seat, relief finally washing over him as he saw no sign of Christopher. Still, he needed to make sure, “Y/N, was Chris in the car?”
You shook your head, “Carlas.” Eddie felt a weight off his shoulders, knowing his son was safe. The weight soon came back when he saw the condition you were in. Your eyes rolled back, and you fell into unconsciousness. Bobby was running the scene, assigning Hen and Chim to medically assist you, and he grabbed the gear to support Buck and Eddie in freeing you from the car. Buck didn’t want to let go of your hand, but he knew he had to in order to get you out sooner. The team worked tirelessly, ensuring to be as careful as possible. Bobby handed the halligan to Buck, “Buck, you focus on getting the doors open. Diaz, grab the saw and be on standby.”
Buck groaned as he tried to pry the doors open, with no results, “Roofs too dented Cap, I can’t get it open.” Bobby nodded, and turned to Eddie, “Saws it is. Get in there Diaz, Buck, you too.” The roof was off in no time, Hen and Chim jumped straight in and equipped you with a neck brace, and got the back board in place to move you. Hen checked your vitals quickly, trying to make sure you were steady enough to be moved. “I’ve got a faint pulse, we gotta move.” They moved you out of you car quickly, and transferred you to the ambulance. “Trauma to the abdomen, possible internal bleeding. I’ll let the hospital know we’re en route.” Buck jumps into the back of the ambulance with Chimney, and instantly takes your hand in his. Hen places herself into the drivers seat, putting the ambulance into 911 mode and begins the journey as fast as she can to the nearest hospital.
Buck hated seeing you like this. He was filled with anxiety, the nausea constantly there as he studied your visible injuries. His heart sank with every second that went by, the more he thought about you laying there almost lifeless, expecting you to flatline any second now. “I’m sorry baby, we can’t leave things like this. I need you to get through this so I can apologise to you. I know I’m not the easiest person to love, and I also know that I’m the biggest pain in the ass, but I love you, and I need you. Please.” Buck sobbed as he held your hand tighter. Time seemed to be going extremely slow for Buck, yet moments later Hen was pulling up at the hospital. You were rushed in, Hen spewed all your information to the nurses as you were wheeled in and handed over. Buck, Hen and Chimney stood there as you were wheeled out of sight. One of the nurses stopped Buck from running after you, and he sat defeated in the waiting room. The rest of the team arrived soon after, Eddies face was similar to Bucks. Eddie spoke first, “Any update?” The lack of response from Buck had him on edge, fearing the worst. Luckily, Chimney filled the silence. “There’s no update, but no news it almost always good news.”
Eddie placed his hand on Bucks shoulder, giving it a reassuring squeeze before sitting down next to him. “How’re you holding up?” Buck didn’t look up, instead he kept his head in his hands. He couldn’t respond, he couldn’t trust his voice not to give out. His leg bounced anxiously, and despite not talking, his feelings were painfully obvious. Eddie could empathise, he knew exactly what was going through Bucks mind. It was happening to him too, but he concealed it as much as he could, knowing Buck needed him. “You know, each time we’re sat in these chairs, it never gets easier. You don’t have to talk, I get it. I think you should know that I’m right here for you, I understand. Y/N is going to be okay, that I have no doubt about. She’s my sister, and us Diaz’s, we don’t back down. We fight.” Eddie continues talking, and he’s not sure whether he’s trying to convince Buck or himself.
A few hours go by, and the team are waiting as patiently as they can for an update. Maddie had arrived some time ago, and was sat with Buck. She was not only there to support her brother, but also her brothers girlfriend, who Maddie had claimed as her best friend shortly after meeting her. Bobby hands a coffee to Buck and Eddie, who hadn’t moved from their seats since arriving. This changed moments later as a nurse approached, making them stand. Buck felt as if his legs were going to give way any second. The nurse cleared her throat, “She’s stable. She’s incredibly lucky to have made it out with the injuries she did, it could’ve been a lot worse. She’s awake, if you’d like to go see her.”
Buck didn’t stick around to hear whatever else the nurse had to say, he darted through the corridor until he got to your room. He stopped to take a deep breath, and stepped inside. He was scared to look at you, all he could picture was you covered in blood still. His head shot up as he heard a voice, your voice to be exact, “Buck?”
He was by your bedside in a blink of an eye, taking your hand in his. His eyes wandered over your body, taking in each of your injuries. His heart broke a little more with each one. He finally looked you in the eyes, and that’s when it hit him. His eyes filled up with tears, “Y/N…”
“Hey, don’t cry. I’m fine, see. I’m right here.” You gave his hand a squeeze, trying to give him the reassurance he needed. Buck took a seat close to your bed, your hand in his and against his lips. You move your hand up to his cheek and wipe his tears, Buck practically melted into your touch. “I really thought I had lost you.”
“I’m right here, I’m not going anywhere. I need to apologise for my reaction earlier, that could’ve been our last conversation earlier and left without saying goodbye, or telling you how much I love you.”
Buck shook his head, “You have nothing to apologise for, I’m the one that owes you an apology. I’m sorry that I’m not more careful when I’m out on a call, I shouldn’t be that reckless. I’m sorry that I can’t promise to walk through that door every night, safe and unscathed. I can appreciate how you feel now, and I promise I’ll try my hardest to be more careful. I love you, and I don’t want you ever feeling anything close to what I’ve felt today.” You wince as you sit up, making Buck panic. You push through the pain, and pull Buck to you. “Come here.” He stands from his chair and leans down to kiss you quickly. He carefully moves your hair from your face, ensuring he doesn’t touch any of your cuts or bruises.
“I love you too, and even though I’m petrified that you won’t make it home one day, I trust that you’ll try everything in your power to make sure you do. I’m proud of you, Evan.” As you spoke, Buck smiled to himself. A sense of relief washed over him. Before he could respond, you continued. “So… does this mean I can finally get a new car now?”
Buck chuckled, “You’re a pain in the ass, Diaz.”
“Takes one to know one, Buck.”
A/N: So, I think I rewrote this like 10 times. Its been a while since I've done any writing, so please bare with me while I figure out my writing style again. Any criticism is welcome, I appreciate the feedback.
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