#and the green really is uggo

[the-physicality]

i am actually so thrilled that we have the order as of right now down.. i've said it before i'll say it again, i. need. coaches. but people are yapping about how dallas sucks, but she is the player that will make it not suck.

[urqofrog]

well back to being a meowmeow

[failure2thrivebb]

I've done it again only better I think!!! I didn't really plan where her name would go so u fortunately it's not very visible behind her but that's okay!!! I think she looks better in this drawring!.....also! I may have goofed it with the green....it looks a little uggo next to all the other colors...sorrryyyyyyy!!!

I might drawr spacey unikitty for my boybfriend because he likes spaceee!!!! Okay bye!!!!! Yay!!!!

[summertrianglee]

[Image ID:

yo what's her number hahah eeyow! [fuckboy lipbite]: nightseeker 4, dragoon 2, arbalist 4, alchemist with short brown hair and glasses, hexer with short brown hair, necromancer 1

peak character design: medic 5, war magus 2, war magus 5, sovereign 2, sovereign 3, sovereign 4, buccaneer 1, buccaneer 3, medic (eo4) 1, both wanderers, fencer 2, pugilist 4, rover 4, vampire 1, gunner 5, survivalist 5, dark hunter 3, sovereign 5, farmer 4

gas: ronin 5, dark hunter (blonde with red whip), medic 2 (mediko), medic masc redhead, highlander 1 and 2, gladiator 4, gladiator 5, twintailed hoplite, ninja 5, old man monk, farmer 5, shogun 5, nightseeker w the middle part, runemaster 4, fencer 3 (blue hair), dragoon 4, harbinger 3, harbinger 4, necromancer 3, fencer 4

its cute!!! or cool!!!: the blonde survivalists, protector 4, dark hunter 1, medic the masc one with glasses, blonde medic, blonde alchemist (masc), troubadour with orange hair, ronin 1 2 and 4, war magus 2, war magus 3, beast 5 (gorilla), hoplite 1, ninja 2, monk 1, monk 4, zodiac 2, zodiac 3, zodiac 5, arbalist 5, farmer 3, shogun 2, landsknecht (eo4) 3, fortress 2, medic (eo4) 3, the girl arcanists, bushi 1, bushi 4, imperial 3, imperial 4, celestrian race portrait 1 (masc), dragoon 3, pugilists 1 2 and 3, harbinger 1 and 2, warlock 2, rover 1, all masuraos, shaman 3 and 4, botanist 1, hero 1 and 2, beast 3 and 4

it's literally fine: landsknechts 1 3 and 2, survivalist (the masc one who isn't blond), protector 1 2 and 3, black hair alchemist, blonde alchemist (fem), white hair troubadour, both male hexers, jack frost gunner, beast 1 and 2, sniper with short brown hair, landsknecht (red hair), hoplite with the bob, buccaneer 2, ninja 1, ninja 4, monk 5, farmer 1, farmer 2, shogun 1 3 and 4, landsknecht (eo4) 1 2 and 4, fortress 1 and 4, sniper 2, both fem eo4 medics, runemaster 2, bushi 2, imperials 1 and 2, earthlain race portraits, fem celestrian race portrait, brouni race portraits, fencer 1, dragoon 1, warlock 4, rover 2, botanists 2 3 and 4, 2 portraits from mystery dungeon 2 that i dont know

he's onto something, but... but...: gladiator 2, hoplite 5, buccaneer 5, yggdroid 4, dark hunter 5

i dont dislike it but i have Problems with it: war magus 4, zodiac 4, wildlings 1 4 and 3, arbalist 1, yggdroids 1 2 3 and 5, dancer 4, troubadour 5, dancers 1 and 3, bushi 3, vampire 2, arbalist 2

my guilt has a strict "no uggos" policy.: landsknecht 5, troubadour 4, protector 5, ronin 3, gunner 4, gunner (black coat), both masc gladiators, hoplit 3, ninja 3, zodiac 1, arbalist 3, nightseeker with fluffy hair, fortress 3, both masc snipers, sniper 4, both masc runemasters, gunner (green coat), both masc arcanists, both therian race portraits, both masc warlocks, necromancer 4, rover 3, shamans 2 and 1

JAILLLLLL: dark hunter 2 (fem w pink hair), alchemist 5, troubadour 2, hexers 2 and 5, sovereign 1, buccaneer 4, monk 2, wildling 2, wildling 5, nightseeker 2, dancer 2, necromancer 2, heroes 3 and 4

hi story character: flavio, raquna, bertrand, simon, arthur, frederica, chloe, highlander, fafnir knight, arianna

/.End ID]

my large evil tierlist go

notes about bias:

i havent played 1 classic at all, i have played a bit of eo2 classic

i havent played either mystery dungeon

i have played through eo3 multiple times (my favorite), eo4 once, eo5 almost done

no thought given to alt colors unless i remembered them. most of these portraits im really only looking at fully while making this tierlist. Feel free to change my mind with good alt colors

just because i dont like some of these doesnt mean i dont like it when other people use it. it's okay when it's your ocs i just wouldnt use the portrait myself

notes about my rankings:

yggdroids are my favorite class bc fuck yes robots, but i wish their designs were better.

dark hunter 5 is so cute, despite the ranking i would play her

most of the problems tier is that yk the designs play into weird stereotypes (wildling and dancer/troubadour) but the first 2 i just dont like blondes, and the bushi just made me laugh the anime boy cut is too funny...

the tiers are unordered. my all time favorite class portrait EVER is [drumroll please...] arbalist 4 alt color.

[fairyv-ice]

Love Wins All

Could they ever be together? He is the son of an aristocrat/ political figure who wants the war to not end, and she is the daughter of a spy who is trying to end the war. Does love Really win all??

Chapter 1 

Him

~Dearest darling my universe, will you take me with you to somewhere far away, beyond wildest dreams, a place imagination can't reach~

It was another day at Eden Academy, Damian Desmond was walking out of the Cecile hall dormitory… More like running, he was up late studying for the chemistry exam and snoozed his alarm, Ewen and Emile even tried to get him up but he wouldn’t budge. It took the dorm mother banging on the door telling him ''home room is starting in 5 minutes” (when it's a ten minute walk to home room from the dorms….)

Obviously running with a purpose and visibly frustrated, Damian was trying to get to class as fast as he could until he was on the ground. One second he was running the next he realized he ran into something… more like someone. A stubby legged, uggo, pink haired girl.

“I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU DON’T EVEN LOOK-“

 He shook his head at his immature thoughts of her. He was 17 now and she was 16. He started to observe the girl, her legs were a bit longer than before, not so stubby and he just never bothered to look at them. He started to get curious and his eyes wandered up her legs until his face felt hot so he turned away and covered his face with his hand. Until he heard a sniffle. He looked up at her face this time he saw tears falling, instantly he moved to get closer to her and hugged her.

“Anya…wha-what’s wrong? I really didn’t mean to run into you. I was just trying to get to class-” He said with a concerned look but cut himself off realizing he is just word-vomiting.

Damian never understood why when this girl cried, his heart melted. It felt like someone punched his chest with every tear that fell from her eyes. He couldn’t understand why, it was so infuriating for him to not understand and all he wanted to do was make her stop crying. He would do anything to make her pain go away. He wanted to make whoever made her like this hurt even worse…. But he didn’t understand why. Why would he care so much? He never had this feeling with anyone else. He thought to himself. Was it because he had known her for so long? No, he has felt this way since the first time she apologized to him when they were just six. All he knew at that moment even though he couldn’t understand was that this pink short girl was crying in his arms and he just wanted to see her smile. 

This was not what he expected today. Sitting on the ground of the courtyard holding a crying Anya Forger, why was she crying? He hasn’t the slightest clue. But he will make it better. 

**Final bell rings**

Anya just sobbed in his arms. He patted her head as he just stared at the building he was supposed to get to for class but all he was thinking is what could have gotten her so worked up to show up to school like this. He took his bag off his shoulder with one arm still around her, he took his handkerchief out of his bag. He lifted her head by her chin so he could see her face, puffy eyes, a bit of snot under her nose, tears everywhere. He gave her a soft smile, he started to gently wipe her face. She just stared at him with those beautiful emerald green eyes. As he was finishing wiping away the visible sadness from her face he realized he was blushing and turned his face away from hers. He couldn’t push her away, (something he would have done if he was a child but not now) Anya needed comfort he thought, and Blackbell wasn’t here so obviously he would have to do. He knew he wasn’t the best at comforting but he was willing to try his best. More calmed (meaning not blushing, why was he blushing anyways? He hadn’t any idea) he looked back at the girl between him, she was still looking at him with those beaut- he cut that thought off and closed his eyes tight.

“Forger, are you okay? Did you want to talk about it? Or talk about something else?”

He opened his eyes to peek and she was still looking at him but with a bit of sadness in her eyes and she just shook her head. 

He pierced his lips, handed her the handkerchief, leaned towards his bag and shuffled through it. He brought out this little brown bag that had a pink bow on it and handed it to Anya. 

“It’s not much but when I was in town this weekend I saw it and I remembered that I owed you from the game of old maid we played last week. Don't think too much of it, it's not like I waited three hours for them to be made and asked for them to make it extra chewy or anything. Really not a big deal. I just remembered you mentioned this place to Blackbell or something.”

He realized he was word-vomiting (again) his whole experience of finding the perfect gift for her and that he took so much time to find the perfect gift for a commoner girl he had no feelings for.. so he thought. 

She looked at him with wide eyes and then looked in the small bag as she pulled the pink ribbon out of the pretty tied bow. Chocolate peanut butter cookies with peanuts in them. He saw a small smile creeping up her face and she looked back at him. 

He blushed, that’s all he needed if he could make sure that smile was there he wouldn’t have to worry about all these unnecessary stresses. Still not understanding why he was so frustrated when she was sad but oh well he will figure it out another time  though, all he cared about was that he was able to make her smile.. well not him the cookies did but still she smiled and there were no tears. The corner of his lips curled up into a small smile still looking at her.

*** realization hit him that they were late to class *** 

He got up as fast as he could and grabbed his and her bag. He helped her get up and she winced in a bit of pain when she was on her feet.

“I think I twisted my ankle,” Anya said, looking at her slightly swollen ankle.

Well that looks like it's gonna get worse, he thought as he put his hand over his eyes and shook his head. 

He got in front of her, back facing her and crouched down

“Get on. It will make it worse if you walk on it.”

She looked at his back with wide eyes and hopped on 

“Thank you sy-on boy…” 

She held on tightly. It felt like she was giving him a.. hug? He thought to himself. ~ i don't think I have really ever received hugs from anyone but her and i don't think i want to really receive hugs from anyone but her.. is that weird?~ he shook his head. After that thought she held on a bit tighter and he turned his head to check if she was okay but she turned her head to not face him. Either way he was running as fast as he could to class so they both wouldn’t get in even more trouble… until… he saw everyone in their class lined up in the hall. It looked like they were in alphabetical order.

They both looked at each other.. they knew what that meant.. Madam Tonitrus.

“Schlag is going to give us detention for sure… or even worse a bolt” Damian said with a worried look.

“Don't worry, let me handle it.” Anya said a little bit too confidently.

“Forger, I don't know if I trust you “handling” it” he said.

“Please trust me” She said with confidence but still that hint of sadness he noticed

He just nodded in agreement, he knew he couldn't argue with her.

They stayed in the back of the line and she was still on his back because after this he was going to take her to the infirmary. Because that is what a gentleman would do of course.

The line continued to move up, they saw Becky, Emile, and Ewen looking at them with concerning looks. 

“I don’t know how you are gonna pull this off” Damian whispered. There were two more people in front of them and Rahden was walking up to them to collect their bags with a look of confusion. 

~Sniffle Sniffle~

Damian turned his head to look at Anya. She was crying into his shoulder. He almost started to panic then heard her sniffle/ whisper “ go along with it, just tell them i fell” 

They were at the front of the line now and Madam Schlag was staring at them.

 “What is the meaning of this? Is this what you call appropriate Mr. Desmond? Not only are you late BUT You should know public displays of-”

Schlag gets cut off by Professor Henderson as he notices Anya crying.

“Ms. Forger, what has happened to make you so upset?”

Mostly everyone is now staring at the pair noting THE Damian Desmond is carrying Anya who was crying and they all started to whisper until Becky quickly shut them up.

“When I was walking to class I saw For- Anya fall, it looked quite painful so I ran to her and saw she twisted her ankle. I was originally going to take her straight to the infirmary but the final bell rang so I thought we would check in to class first and then go.” 

Damian said nervously, not mentioning that he and her actually ran into each other because if they knew they were both running they would know that they were both late and would get in more trouble. His inner thoughts were cut off when he heard Professor Henderson clear his throat.

“Mr. Desmond, that is very elegant of you, I do admire that” Professor Henderson states. He turned to the staring students “Class, please take note. If someone is in need of help it is always best to stop and help.” He turned back to a now blushing Damian and Anya “ Mr. Desmond please take her to the infirmary and please do take your time, we don't want that injury to get worse!”

Damian nodded with a hue of pink on his face and was about to turn around to head to the infirmary until Schlag called “WAIT! I just looked in his bag. Your “perfect gentleman” Mr. Desmond did not bring his Handkerchief. He cannot get off that easily we do have rule and requirements that we do follow” she said, smirking  “ As for Ms. Forger her bag was fine.”

~sniffle Sniffle~

Anya finally looked up from Damian’s shoulder, whipping her face with Damian’s handkerchief that he gave her earlier. “He gave me his Hanky ~sniffle~ earlier becu- because i was cr-crying. ~sniffle~ Please if any-one sho-should get in trouble i-it should be me” she said as she was still crying. 

Damian was looking at her wide-eyed and speechless. 

The class was looking at them wide-eyed and speechless.

Rahden was behind Schlag wide-eyed holding their bags.

Becky, Emile and Ewen were all side-eyeing each other and smirking.

“Saying that I’m surprised is an understatement, this is TREMENDOUSLY ELEGANT BEHAVIOR. Please Mr. Desmond go now Ms.Forger seems to be in pain from her injury and you have done everything an Elegant Gentleman would do please do not worry i will take everything here. Rahden please give them their bags so they can go” 

Rahden handed Damian the bags and with that Damian slightly bowed to the Professor and turned and walked towards the infirmary. 

Schlag was in shock she has never seen someone handle a situation like Mr. Desmond. Henderson was correct, Mr. Desmond was extremely elegant. 

“Well Professor, you have this taken care of. Rahden and I will take our leave now”  she stated and retreated from the hall.

The students all went back to their seats. 

Professor Henderson told them to get into groups for now and have study time since he knew they had a test later in the day. 

Becky ,Emile and Ewen all sat together. Their books are on their desk but that's the last thing they’re talking about.

“Do you think it's finally going to happen? Will they actually realize that they have feelings for eachother?” Ewen said 

“The boss man said he doesn't like Anya like that, but then he pulls a stunt like this? You guys know this is all anyone will be talking about all week” Emile said.

“Well I think they will hopefully realize it sooner rather than  later. It’s literally been over a decade of them “Having noOoO Feelings” for each other and this is literally our last full year of school. When we see them later, why don't you guys talk to Damin in the dorm and I will talk to Anya about what happened and see where they are with each other? Something Obviously happened this morning… Maybe they both just need a little push in the right direction. Anya and I are going to the new bakery today so I will be with her after school! Sounds good?”

They all nodded in agreement.

A/N: Hi, so this whole fic (there will be a few chapters if this one goes well) is inspired by IU’s song Love Wins All and Some songs from Ariana Grandes Eternal Sunshine album. We are here for the sad girl vibes. Everyone is aged up in the fic (it’s like last year of school for them!! There will be eventual romance/smut and all that but we have to build up to that. So we shall see how this goes. Also i have NEVER posted my work before so pls lmk how this was. If it goes weill i will post the next chapter. Sorry if this is trash.

[horrorvampirebatbite]

creative freedom is great but i still really dont like coloured mascara. unless youre going all in balls to the wall exciting and different completely unrecognisable makeup then i dont care for it, but people trying to make like blue or pink or green mascara work for a really uggo polished and perfected full face like i simply hate that same can be said for coloured falsies

[grovey]

too many dogs again

(previously) I don't know how else to describe this era. I usually have to have a bunch in storage and i'm letting them slowly trickle out

in addition to joyously breeding as many two-headed dogs as possible, I'm currently on Worm Quest. after that I believe I'll complete flora... last one I don't have yet is multiple tails lmao.

pink princess did not get much love. i'm very sorry. It's hard being overshadowed by a two-headed sibling. here she is being consumed by Loot Box (aka Granule)

They're best friends with More Chalices!! :]

I think with Sopor I just wanted to keep the eyelashes going, and also she ended up with too many legs for worm goal. So instead. I just wanted her to be as cute and green as possible.

(Last one is her with her little half-brother, Green Chalice... more on him in a bit.)

Tofu Tofu of course has made some completely delightful kids... Here's Century Egg, who is another leg less into Worm Quest.

Siblings :] I don't have a lot of pictures of Boy Spreadsheet, but he's got some kids coming up. He's Microsoft Excel x Tofu Tofu I believe.

Egg and Health Inspector are probably OSHA Violation x Tofu Tofu.

Absolutely delighted with the sheepdogs we've been producing

Health Inspector is PISSED with ghosts. She also got stuck in a corner somehow

Let's check up on Loot Box again... and... Chalices' kids...!!

The poor little guy is Green Chalice. he's kind of uggo but at least he has two legs. His sister is Red Chalice. I THINK Century Egg is their other parent but I forget.

Red is very very cute :]

Cool dogs (Health Inspector, Red Chalice, Danger Sheep!!)

Chaos...! (turns out Boy Spreadsheet does have a really nice photo :] )

After all that madness... we closed out with some great breeding achievements... I did say Boy Spreadsheet has some fun kids...

Our first 3-headed dog, Statistic(s) Major... (Boy Spreadsheet x Loot Box)

And to wrap up. A wonderful development for Worm Quest

siesta season (century egg x sopor slime) my little green girl.

One leg to go!!! good night!!!

[imposterogers]

Steve/thor is really funny to me because it's all og avengers era and yk people were like uh. Um. Which white men can we ship that are not just absolute uggos no I will not apologize to rdj or Renner

I wish I WISH I was actually active in 2012 I can only attempt to recreate the mindset of the stans not truly access their power but the way I’m imagining their thought process is first off u have to hate stony (that was way too popular for no reason), you believe clintasha is canon bc of the arrow necklace (or if u can’t support a het ship u stick clint w coulson for no reason except middle aged white men solidarity??) bruce is not an option bc he turns green, if ur not a th*ki shipper and winter soldier hasn’t come out and you definitely didn’t watch the first avenger so stevebucky isn’t an option..........so uhhhh steve and thor am I right!!!

[terribleben10opinions]

Ranking mutant Kevos

Birds fly, fish swim, I’m a high functioning moron with both a superiority and inferiority complex and Kevin will always mutate into a scary mutant boy, but not all these mutations are equal because I said so. Lets kill more time while my gamers thumb heals (yes that’s a real thing and yes I hate that it’s called that) and RANK EM.

6. Alien Force mutation

This guy is at the end for 2 reasons. First being it’s pretty boring, homeboy get’s an entireful of omnitrix energy and all that happens is that he gets rough skin? Having this power swap didn’t even become interesting  because it was always surface level “oh I’m big uggo now” it would’ve been cooler to show practical problems to this like his wooden legs catch on fire or he has to wash up with WD-40 to prevent himself from rusting, he’s just ugly and can make hammer fists PLUS he owns an ID mask so he can just be normal?? I’d like it better if he put on the teenage mutant ninja turtle get up with a fedora and trench coat. Second reason for it being shit is that it doesn’t make much sense, with the other mutations it followed a set logic, Kevin absorbs multiple flavours of alien transformation energy so he transforms into a fusion dance of them, so why this time did he just become seemingly earth materials? Is it because he absorbs the matter so much it’s in his DNA?? DOES HOMIE HAVE DIAMOND AND WOOD IN HIS GENES???? It just seems lazy in design and usage HOWEVER we did get some sick episodes like the one where Kevin tries to reverse his shit with DarkStar, that was dope. If I was making this I’d have Kevin do the halfer omnitrix mutations when he absorbed stuff and always a little bit stays over i.e he absorbs stone and get’s the stone bit on half of him and then the other gets one big chill hand and half a face but normally it’s just the hand and half a face meaning that there’s some stuff the ID mask can’t cover up), this would’ve made more monstrous looks for Kevin and given him more powers AND for cartoon Network WAY more toys.

5. Ultimate Kevin

Okay I get what they were going for here and before I get into criticisms I want to give some due credit. I appreciate that he’s supposed to be an even MORE patchwork version of the OG Kevin mutation but even stronger and more unhinged, and honestly I like seeing the LODESTAR shoulder poking out of the swamp fire arm BUT with this due credit comes I think due criticism which is that this design looks ugly and stupid. How can you create this ugly motherfucker and not make him one, include all 10 original aliens in the design and two not make him look scary?? I get the feeling the designers gave Kevin the cloak to make him look brooding and menacing but it really just looks like my man is into LARPing. Also why does he have just a couple brainstorm legs dangling where his legs are supposed to be? All the other designs kept the legs the legs and the arms the arms so why for this one did they change it? It doesn’t look horrific or anything it just looks bad to me, like they couldn’t think of any way to include brainstorm so they just tossed the legs there.I think the most damning design choice they made was fucking up his head. If I was making it I would’ve gave him a more Kevin face (instead of Jetray the ugliest alien ben has) and given him alien eyes, maybe one echo echo and one big chill?( I know most of the UAF aliens have similar eyes but you gotta keep some aspect of the eyes thing, especially if they’re both just green.) I think the face and eyes thing really helps show the humanity but also the lack of it. Or they could to the opposite and keep the jetray face but give him normal Kevin eyes to show the humanities. Finally the mismatched feet are just odd and what's even odder (more odd?) is that he walks just fine! I TRIP JUST WALKING IN MY SKETCHERS AND THIS GUY IS FINE SUPPORTING 10x HS NORMAL WEIGHT ON 2 MISMATCHED FEET HE’S NEVER USED?? This design went hard but when you go too hard you just have a boner in biology and look stupid.

4. Omniverse Kevin (old)

Honestly for the most part this design looks good, the colour contrast is nice and I like how his head is Kevin straight but with red evil eyes. The curse of this design is that half the aliens are more “serious” aliens (Grav attack, Feedback, crash hopper, astrodactyl and shock squatch) and then the other half are the jokey more fun aliens (Bloxx, Peskydust, the worst, ball weevil) so his whole tone is kinda inconsistent. I think for this one they should’ve gone with AtomiX for the bloxx arm, dual astrodactyl wings, whampires head thing (or toe picks) and just remove the two extra arms. This is nitpicking but how does Kevin even have the extra arms? THere’s no forearms/ spidermonkey DNA going on so it seems weird to have the extra arms. I’m being mean though, this design is aesthetically pleasing just a bit too all over the place.

3. Kevin 11,000

This design isn’t bad per say, it’s problem stems from having Kevin call himself “Kevin 11,000″ and then add like 2 extra alien powers. I like the cthulhu like tentacles and the upgrade one jutting out of the four arms arm also the spooky heatblast head is badass. But c’mon guys, he still has those 2 wildmutt arms? What’s he even use them for? Ass scratchers?? This is a cool design but promised too much and gave us very little, that being said for a like 3 minute max screen time it’s an impressive design.

2. Rooter Kevin

This one honestly shouldn’t be this high but it represents something I really hoped for in the original series which was to make a new fusion Kevin with Ben’s new aliens and this is a good design! I like the Eye guy eyes used as cannonbolt’s arm armour, I love the use of Way Big’s head fin and give him an excuse for size and strength and that this actually managed to walk the line of having Kevin’s face be recognizable yet fucked up. My only problem with it is that BenWolf (Blitzwolfer if you’re wrong) is only in Kevin’s right eyeball which is a bit lazy, i’d’ve liked the tail to be it but that’s just me. Major kudos also for having a Kevin mutation while also not giving him double arms (no alien force doesn’t get credit because this one was a stylistic choice and alien force’s was most likely a “ooooohhhh but that’d be hard :(((((   )

1. Kevin 11

OOOOOH MAMA THAT’S A GOOD DESIGN. This patchwork design looks intimidating and powerful yet also maintains this weird uniformness by having a main anchor point of the design be Fourarms so our brains recognize the familiar fourarms but also seeing the strange additions making it walk the line between looking normal and monstrous. I enjoy how he uses the Wildmutt arms to help him run because his upper body is so massive. I like how he has that vestigial RipJaws dangler but for some reason can also swap his jaws out for RipJaws’s kinda like a real angler fish. The mismatched eyes are also awesome and I’d be really curious to see his line of sight. I only wish that his upgrade and ghostfreak parts were used more but even as just aesthetic pieces it’s fine. The only real dumb part is that he has normal feet instead of the XLR8 balls so his super speed is kinda weird to have but it’s fine, probably has to do with the muscles inside his legs anyway. I think real care went into this design and I like how Kevin has Ben’s powers filling the “evil man with heroes power cliche, but kinda subverts it by making them 10% as strong but also letting him use combos on the fly to make up for it. In short, good design. 

[sawyersick]

1 through 69 because you gotta twin with me

OMG ASDFGHJKL

aight here goes bitchez

1. are you religious?

nahh but my parents sent me to church camp when I was in elementary school??? For the cheap childcare I guess???

2. what animal do you think you’re most like?

I haven’t thought about this much but I think a field mouse!!

3. how do you take your coffee?

never……………………… I hate coffee

4. how old were you when you had your first kiss?

my mom’s bosses son forced himself on me when we were 6 lol so I don’t count that……….. so 15 i guess (according to my friend, if there’s no hormones it doesn’t count lol)

5. museum date or aquarium date?

AQUARIUM AQUARIUM AQUARIUM

6. do you have any tattoos or piercings? do you want more?

Just my ears are pierced and I have a whale (badly) tattooed on my hip I’ll post pix if you want but its pretty uggo

I want another whale on the other side so I’ll be symmetrical and a triangle hand tat….. maybe an eyeball tat (a tattoo of an eyeball…. not one on my eye lol)? I’m not really interested in anymore piercings tho

7. favorite fruits?

strawberries!!!

8. favorite vegetables?

when I was 12 I ate so many carrots my skin turned orange and my mom thought I had jaundice

also I heckin love mushrooms

9. i’ll only date you if _____. (fill in the blank)

I’ll only date you if you treat me with respect :(

10. do you cry a lot?

yeah lol at least twice a month minimum

11. who are your closest friends?

I don’t really have any? I’ve felt distant from my irl friends lately so idk probably just demo

12. have you ever been a part of a protest or a march?

I did the walk out for gun violence

13. do you play any video games?

helllllls yeah but I usually only play 3/ds

14. did you ever have an emo or scene phase?

yes and I think I’m still in it rip

15. what color is most of your wardrobe?

I think I wear a lot of blue! and black and white too i guess…… I’m trying to add more reds tho

16. what do you like to do for fun?

I bake and sew and draw! and listen to music

17. what is your biggest fear?

body horror tw for this one rip

being abandoned, being forced to do horrifically gross/unclean stuff, getting my eyes gouged out, getting the bones in my hands broken, getting acid poured on my face, the people around me dying, being forced to eat live slugs, getting my skin peeled off with a knife

18. name a subject you know a lot about.

whales/the ocean in general and baking!! and the band Liily

19. favorite fictional characters?

hm idk? Link and Zelda from LoZ, Clover and Snake and Aoi from 999, rhyme from TWEWY, Maka and Soul from Soul Eater, Storm from the Xmen, Ariel from the Little Mermaid, Chun Li, the Kagamines, Rilakkuma

idk I just thought about characters I have merch for

20. do you read a lot? what are your favorite books?

I used to??? Haven’t had the time for it in a while though and I’ve been reading a lot of how-to books as of late….. I really liked the Legend trilogy though

21. how would you describe your style?

art style and fashion style would both be classified as “cute but tries to be edgy” I think

22. did you have a favorite stuffed animal when you were little? do you still own it?

Yes!! a pastel elephant with a rattle in it named Elephant (very creative I know) He’s in my stuff somewhere now and this question reminded me to go find him again

23. what’s something most people love that you hate?

hmmm…. sports? mustard? airpods???? idk

24. do you think you’re a good singer?

actually yes? I wanna be in a band but I’m lowkey afraid of singing in front of people I know but have no problem doing it in front of an audience of strangers hmu if you’re in the SF bay area I’ve written 6 punk songs

25. who do you live with?

my parents and cat

26. favorite desserts?

ice cream, anything with chocolate or whipped cream, creme brulee, lemon tarts

I’m not too picky though lol

27. what is the best decision you’ve made in your life so far?

realizing that I can actually do mostly whatever I want and most things have fewer consequences than I think

also cutting people out of my life that emotionally exhaust me

28. favorite makeup brands?

uhhhh whatever’s cheap and doesn’t make my eyes burn ig urban decay is good when I can afford it

29. favorite clothing stores/brands?

Goodwill??? I used to shop at f21 but I try not to anymore

30. what was your first job?

working at a lake teaching windsurfing and sailing and I still work there

31. do you take a lot of naps?

n o  I absolutely  h a t e  taking naps and try to avoid them

32. what is your favorite part about your body?

hmm I have pretty good hair i think and sometimes my eyes? I have huge (genetic) eyebags tho which gets me down

33. are you more dominant or more submissive?

In day to day life I guess I’m more dominant??? like I make decisions when nobody else wants to :0 also idk intimately since iM aN aDuLt vIrGiN and pretty sex repulsed but probably sub 

34. are you more outgoing or more shy?

outgoing but sometimes it makes me annoying

35. how tall are you?

short…………………………. 4′8/143 cm

36. what is your body type?

uhh hourglass????? maybe pear I got them Thunder Thighs according to the guy who got kicked out of drama club for peeping in the girls changing room

37. favorite flower?

calendula, sunflowers, lavender and dianthus!!

38. favorite planet?

Neptune??????????????????

39. what do you want to dress up as for halloween this year?

I wanna be the bride of frankentstein but in a shiro lolita coordinate to make her look ~fancy~ or the Nancy part of Sid and Nancy if I’m in a relationship by that time

40. do you prefer to date people the same age as you, younger, or older?

Ideally the same age and I’m wary of dating anyone more than 2 years younger or older than me but I’m more willing to date older than younger

41. describe the person you’re in love with/have a crush on in great detail.

yall know who it is already but

in a band, dark hair, kinda tall, very fashionable, coincidentally happens to be the same racial mix as me, good at art, very humble, really sweet, lives in SoCal, has a hand tattoo of milk and “aye yah” on his arm, paints his nails orange, wears a lot of rings, gets freckles in the summer, prefers vanilla over chocolate, ties his shoes the cool way

42. who is your biggest inspiration?

idk at the moment? I like to draw from many inspirations

43. do you have any kinks?

???????????????????????????????????

44. do you own any pets?

one (1) very loving cat

45. which celebrity do people say you look the most like?

……………………….. myself

I literally had to google mixed race celebrities and STILL none look like me lol

46. do you like sports?

not really except I weirdly like baseball

47. have you ever seen a broadway musical?

Yes!! I won tickets to On Your Feet and Charlie and The Chocolate Factory

I also won Hamilton tickets but saw it in SF yall should download the app

48. what is your favorite kind of food?

noodles!!

49. would you rather be a fairy or a mermaid?

MERMAID actually I have a mermaid tail too so

50. what is your instagram?

@wishwhale :)

51. glossy lips or matte lips?

glossy by default because I have chronically dry skin/lips so matte lips are sooooooooooooooo uncomfy but it looks good on other people lol

52. do you like cherry, grape, blue raspberry, watermelon, or green apple jolly ranchers the best?

grape because im weird

53. what are your best personality traits?

I’d like to think that I’m kind and sometimes funny

54. what is your ethnicity?

asian/white

55. what different hair colors have you had?

brown and brown with pink that was supposed to be purple

56. favorite disney princess?

Ariel! bc mermaid

57. favorite album of 2017?

Humanz by Gorillaz  or Deep Dream by Daddy Issues I guess

I was weirdly obsessed with Feel Your Feelings Fool when it came out but I’m not really into it anymore though

58. have you ever had braces?

nah

59. favorite holiday?

Halloween! Because dressing up is fun

60. post a selfie.

how do I make this smaller anyways I don’t normally wear this much makeup but I’m going to a small show tonight

61. are you a good swimmer?

Yes!! I swim once a week at my local pool

62. do you wear jewelry?

I used to wear a lot………. like multiple necklaces and bracelets and rings daily but now I wear my ring every day and a necklace/earrings if I remember

63. can you play any instruments?

I’m learning guitar!!

64. do you have any siblings?

short answer is no but you can dm me for the long answer

65. are your grandparents still alive? how old are they?

just my maternal grandmother and she is almost 90! My paternal grandmother lived to 102 so I’m hoping for those good genes though (I think she would have lived longer because my family suspects elder abuse by my weird aunt)

66. who knows the most about you?

hmm probably Demo or Emily

67. are you a more quiet person or do you talk a lot?

I! Never! Shut! Up!

68. what advice would you give to your 13 year old self?

shut the fuck up you stupid bitch you arent cool

69. how many pillows do you sleep on?

two

[mimithealpaca]

Honing into Deku Expy 2.0's Design...

The designs I shared in the previous post are actually a bit outdated. As of yesterday, the Deku Expy 2.0's design has gotten rounder! And more Utena-y, LOL.

I mean, honestly, isn't it kind of cute that he has a little rose swirl for bangs? Although, maybe HE should be the one with the Aibara last name and not his future boyfriend...

Also, cameo-ing are their BKDK Expy predecessors. I'll give you their names so I can stop referring to them as BKDK Expies 1.0. The green-haired one is Mana! The blonde-haired one is Yashiro! Alternatively known as Scholar Dad and Kami Dad because story reasons! IIRC, they were conceptualized last year u.u.

The next pic is a quick note on his main outfit. Again, we're in the super early stages of their conception, so nothing is set in stone.

What I had in mind for him though was that I wanted him to give off the vibe that he's the timid but well put-together type of character. That one kid in class who smells nice and their collar is very straight. Like, he would fit in with some bougie college students in the future. But in actuality, he's a nerd (after all, his inspiration is Deku), but specifically, a rock/metalhead nerd. All he owns is black. He's THAT kind of a teen. Into all the dark shit, but he's the opposite of that.

As for the hoodie and leggings outfit, I was thinking that would be what he would wear to his magic fighting school. Since his whole wardrobe is black and just t-shirts and jeans, these are actually pieces from his older sister.

And why, you may be thinking, would he wear this to magic fighting school? Because I'm thinking there's going to be a joke about how the school doesn't have a uniform because they can't afford that for their students. Besides, they're not there to look pretty--they're there to learn how to not die to the demons leaking into their world... or something. (STILL WORKSHOPPING THAT.)

In the following pics, I was playing around with the idea of different colors to use with the MC. I am aware he has a rather bland character design (done on purpose), but I was thinking what could give him that anime edge (because he is ultimately in an anime story) are the colors of his fire power.

The final pic was an attempt to note down a face I have in my head. It's from a scene where he sees his future boyfriend and he's all happy. I... didn't really capture it. But these were all done with a new tablet, which I'm not used to, so... maybe that's why it's extra uggo?

[ashalaughs]

An Annotated List of Men’s Tinder Profiles Part 13

Tough times call for making fun of dudes on the internet. Transatlantic edition.

1. I drink a lot of pink lemonade and I don’t CARE who knows!: You do you, boo

2. I once accidentally stole a diamond, wanna know How?: Yes but not enough to talk to you

3. What kind of my type are you? The kind that starts riots, the kind that rides bikes irresponsibly, or the kind that want to escape into the woods and become a swamp witch?: Truly, a man of very specific tastes

4. Iam an uncomplicated person. I like to improvise and I like to know.: These seem like contradictory impulses.

5. I am a better cook than all aliens of the entire universe: A bold and totally unverifiable claim

6.  Aussie boy looking for a lovely local lass to teach me how to play the ugly stick: Is this…a euphemism?

7. Latino (original one, from Latin Europe :P): Who will explain to him that’s not what that means?

8. My dad always said “you want a lady on the streets but a freak in the sheets!” However I just want a freak everywhere!: What a fascinating father son relationship

9. I always face others sincerely and give others a smile! The countries that impress me the most are Iraq and Afghanistan!: I guess I’m just really curious about what work “impress” is doing in this sentence

10. I bet I can cook better than you your mum and Nan combined I will prove it if you let me. I have made Mike Tyson milkshake and cookies at 1:45am: I’m impressed but also neither of those things require cooking

11. I like my women, like I like my sake: cool, unfiltered, and on someone else’s tab: I truly cannot parse this one

12. Low-key looking for my Lady Macbeth: who isn’t longing for the kind of spouse that pushes you to murder?

13. Looking for fellow LGBTQ mental health and human rights activist with 0% hypocrisy: I mean, good luck buddy.

14. ONS/FWB is fine. If you’re drunk, desperate, or don’t care. But no fucking Tory. Even miserable pricks like me have some standards: Had to include this one for being hilariously British

15. If you’ve read “The Art of Seduction” and “The Prophet” we’ll probably vibe: A truly wild combination of books

16. PS: I absolutely do not look like the The Tinder Swindler and I have no enemies: Convincing!

17. Bras are like best friends. They are close to the heart and always there for support. Be my bra.: Classic tinder: a laboured simile that suggests a strangely non-reciprocal relationship

18. It’s a race and I always finish first: Can’t say he didn’t warn you

19. Not into myth… NO Medusas plz: An unnecessarily grand way to say no uggos but okay

20. Roses are red, violets are blue / This brown man’s arrange marriage is due / If you can save me from it, I’ll cook curry for you: Please someone save the poor woman who is supposed to marry this fool

21. For girls trying to find a guy in his mid 30s on a dating app it really truly is shopping at the discount rack. The sweater looks great from a far however it has a hole in it or one arm is longer than the other. Now it’s a perfectly good sweater, however it’s up to you to deal with imperfections: Love a man who will compare himself to a shoddily made garment

22. Hate – Wheelie bin teeth (1 black 1 green 1 f**g missing): Is this a thing you encounter regularly?

23. Already in love w another woman but need sex and intimacy from someone else before she falls in love with me too: This does not contain nearly enough information and also sounds like the plot of a terrible movie

24. There must be male models on this app because nobody matches with me and my mom says I’m pretty handsome. This is bs. Not vaccinated and never will be: Yes, male models are the only possible explanation for this mystery

25. I’m challenging, confident, stubborn, carry ½ the empathy I should, driven to always be trying or doing new things, exercise in someway three times a week, and eager to find similar: If you know any cold-hearted fitness girl bosses, hit this guy up

[chandler-notbing]

what i remember of phantom of the opera

alright, so, we start in black and white, the scene is an auction. some rich ass fuck buys a big old chandelier. then the lights on the stage go on and suddenly it’s in color and that classic phantom motif BAAAAA BAbaBAbaBAAAAA babaBaBaBAAAA is playing. so we get to see the opera house in full color and a bunch of stuff is happening and then eventually we settle down on watching a dance rehearsal. 

Emmy Rossum (who is only fucking 16 YEARS OLD AT THE TIME OF FILMING) plays christine, who is dancing her little heart out. in the wings, some opera managers and Minnie Driver (the Primadonna or whatever )are squabbling. she’s refusing to play some part, I think it was a costume issue? she definitely says “i hate my hat” but it really sounds like “i ate my hat.” so Christine’s Hot Friend suggests Christine to replace Minnie Driver. The opera managers are like fine whatever.

soooo they bring Christine to the center stage and have her sing “Think of Me” and they’re all stunned and whatnot and while the camera is spinning around her the scene changes from the dance rehearsal to the performance and she’s all dressed up and has white glittery things in her hair. There’s  a man named Raoul in one of those high up booths that Lincoln got shot in. And he’s like “Ohhhh shit that’s my childhood crush damn I Think Of Her all the time”.

so I think he brings her flowers after that performance and as like “ayy remember me?” and christine was like “yeah we were friends when my dad died during childhood” and then he leaves. Christine’s Hot Friend comes in and was like “bitch you killed it also who is that hottie that brought you flowers” and Christine is like “yeah some guy but guess what. I think the ghost of my father? is giving me singing lessons” and they walk through this candle lit corridor to someeeplaceeee???

whatever, Christine ends up back in her green room looking at herself in the mirror practicing her singing when the ghostly voice is like “sing for me” and then a masked stranger appears in her mirror and she’s like “that’s not my dad but he could be my daddy” and she follows him through the mirror??? into a different candlelit corridor into his sex dungeon. I think it’s now at the song “past the point of no return” because blue balls i guess?? they have to take a boat to the sex dungeon!! and it’s gold and there’s candles and a shrine for her and a weird gold bed. she’s laid down in it and she’s wearing white and her tiddies are POPPIN and it made me feel weird as a kid. 

ok so they get Christine to do another performance and Raoul is like MARRY ME and she’s like YEAH but keeps it on the down low because maybe she’s scared of this mysterious phantom that fucked her and lives in the opera house. so they’re celebrating on the roof singing something in a light sprinkle of snow. But the phantom has followed her and he’s actually on the roof too!! and he’s crying and gets weird. 

I think at this point people are still thinking the phantom is just a rumor or not real, so he like slashes the chandelier down to be like “bitch im here!!” 

so i think Minnie Driver is back in action at this point because the opera is getting more popular because of the crowd Christine has drawn in. So she goes back to being the performer and then the phantom just fucking murks a stage hand??? and is like Christine is the True Queen you better put her back on stage. and the opera managers are like “nah.”

I think maybe before the next performance there’s the sword fight in the snowy graveyard because christine wants to visit her dads grave with raoul but ofc the phantom has followed her. it’s a surprisingly dull sword fight.

alright so now we’re at the masquerade having fun and it’s funny because the phantom is famously masked so no one would know if he’s there! but then he just fucking announces it with a big record scratch while he’s suavely descending a red staircase. and he gives the opera managers (one of whom is named Andre!!!) a new opera to perform and tells them that he and christine will star in it. so now they listen to him. 

They do his opera and it’s very sexual and Raoul just has to sit there and take it like a cuck. There’s some very lame fake flames. Christine at this point is fucking tired of this guy and tears his mask off in front of everyone!! and it turns out he’s very ugly!! and he’s very upset that he’s been unmasked. his hair is suddenly now blond also. so he uh takes Christine down a trap door to escape to his sex dungeon to hold her captive forever. 

Raoul wants to find her so he’s running around and Christine’s Hot Friend warns him to keep his hand at the level of his eye because the phantom loves to throw rope around people and strangle them. so maybe he could catch it before he gets strangled or something. 

UHHHH ok so Unsexy Phantom is like “Christine you done fucked up, you could have had a wonderful life with the sexy masked version of me, but you humiliated me and now you have to be a sex servant to Ugly Me.”

Raoul gets there but is immediately tied up because I guess it didn’t help to keep his hand at the level of his eye. so the phantom is like “christine i’ll let you go if you let me kill your fiance.” except since the phantom is played by Gerard Butler for some fucking reason he’s like Ugly shouting and it’s very embarrassing.

ok here’s the thing. I have absolutely no recollection of how this ends. i think the phantom hears the crowd coming and he’s like “ahhhh never mind” so christine and raoul get out free but does the phantom just keep living in his dungeon of the opera house??? I know they can’t use it as an opera house anymore because no one would come after that spectacle so that’s why they auctioned off the chandelier. so then it’s back to the future in black and white and there’s the little monkey cymbal that the phantom owned when he was like, used as a weird featured entertainment because he was such an uggo. and then there’s a woman in a horse drawn carriage and i’m pretty sure it’s christine just taking a look around the place and she just goes away. I don’t think Raoul is with her. 

@titusmoody

@dontletthishappentoyou

[kindaangelic]

Love Me a Little

Tim felt humiliated. He had never felt so vulnerable in his life, and with Dick, no less. He should have seen this coming, he should have dodged that bolt of magic, he should have moved faster, should've, would've, could've- But hindsight did nothing for the fact that he was now a tiny baby who was having his suitably tiny butt powdered by Dick Grayson, Mother Extraordinaire. “All done!” Dick crowed, administering a final, powdery, pat on his tush. “Don't you feel fresh now, Timmy?” Tim did feel as fresh as the morning dew, but he wasn't going to let Dick have the satisfaction of knowing that. Instead, he mewled plaintively, reaching out for the void to engulf him. By sheer happenstance, the direction in which he stretched was exactly where Jason was passing by after his nap. “Do you want to go to Jay?” Dick asked, bouncing him. “Jason, Timmy wants his big brother!” Jason blinked sleepily at his brothers and itched himself slowly, deliberately, before snagging Tim in one arm. “Hey, TimTam,” Jason yawned. “Don't you look all fresh and nice. Did Dickface give you a bath?” Tim squirmed uncomfortably, loath to relive the torturous memories of Bathtime. He let out a warbling wail, and looked angrily at Jason, who proceeded to mess up Dick’s hard work by blowing raspberries in Tim’s tummy, eliciting squeals from the unhappy yet tickled baby. “Hey, he likes it,” Jason said, completely misinterpreting Tim’s tortured noises for happiness. “Tim, who's your favourite brother?” Tim lunged towards Dick, making grabby hands at his saviour, who swept Tim out of the tickle monster’s arms. “Traitor,” Jason said good-naturedly. “It's lucky that he won't remember all of this when he turns back, huh?” “Oh, for sure,” Dick agreed. “Can you imagine him remembering all of this, or understanding us?” “Pfft,” Jason muffled a laugh, “I'm pretty sure he'd run away first.” “Yeah, it's pretty funny, huh?” Tim glared at his chortling brothers, and wondered if the League of Assassins was still recruiting. ----------- Tim dozed off as Dick and Jason carried him around the house, waking only when he felt a scratchy material on his face. Did those two numbskulls put him on the carpet!? Tim blinked awake, only to realize that the scratchy feeling was not from the carpet, but from where he was smushed against Bruce’s bare, hairy, chest, as the man lounged in front of the television where he was having his bi-monthly existential crisis. Said crisis usually consisted of asking questions such as am I really making a difference? Would my parents approve of my lifestyle? Why won't my children ever hug me? Why does Dick hug me so much? The answers to which were, in order, yes, I can't speak for the dead, because you're unapproachable, and because Dick has made it his personal mission in life to hug everything into submission, and frankly, his success rate is startlingly high. Currently, Bruce was cradling Tim and a bowl of popcorn (plain) against his bare chest and stomach, respectively, as the television blared news about Superman’s latest feat of hunkyness - rescuing a kitten from a tree - while Tim was having a mental freakout about lying next to Bruce’s nipple. Bruce came out of his stupor as Tim stirred awake and regarded his now infant son carefully. “I miss this,” Bruce said after a while. “You don't remember this, but you used to be here all the time when you were a baby. Perks of being the bachelor neighbor, I got to babysit you a lot. We used to do this a lot, too,” he admitted, gesturing at himself and the television, as Tim listened, enraptured. “My existential crises were different though. They were more centered around starting out as Batman and if I was really gay. I'm bisexual,” Bruce reaffirmed. Tim giggled, and Bruce smirked. “Yes, it seems so frivolous now, doesn't it? But when I was in my twenties, Superman’s pectorals haunted my dreams. Now, he haunts me in real life with his stupidity and talking and emotions, ugh.” Tim looked around guiltily, thinking back on all the times he had imagined Conner’s pecs bouncing. “Why am I talking about Clark?” Bruce interrupted himself. “Stupid Clark. This is father-son bonding time,” Bruce said, addressing Tim seriously. “As I was saying, you were here all the time. You said your first word here, you know. It was ‘bat’.” Bruce paused before continuing, “I should have known. I should have adopted you then. Maybe we would have had more time together, and you wouldn't have left home,” he said softly. Tim mashed his face into Bruce’s chest to convey his feelings, which Bruce seemed to understand. “You were my baby for the longest time, and I couldn't accept that you were going to leave. I keep losing kids and I don't know why,” he complained softly. “Dick went to crummy Blüdhaven, Jason died, came back, and hates me, Cassandra is in Hong freaking Kong, and Damian keeps calling me ‘Father’ like I don't know. Is ‘daddy’ too difficult a word? And you left and got a stupid flat in a stupid apartment complex,” Bruce grumbled. After a stretch of comfortable silence, Bruce hiked Tim up higher and looked him dead in the eye. “But I have you now, and I'm going to make the most of it. Prepare for hugs, Timothy my boy,” Bruce said, before cuddling Tim. Tim squeaked in shock, and made valiant attempts to avoid the Batman’s nipple, but appreciated the frank affection that was so rarely found in the house that did not come from Dick. ---------- “Your first word was not ‘bat’, as Master Bruce likes to think,” Alfred informed Timothy as he fed him tiny spoonfuls of applesauce. “It was ‘butt’. But Master Bruce does like his denial, doesn't he?” Tim clapped his hands gleefully, overjoyed that his first word had been said to cause someone affront. ---------- Just when he thought that everyone had had their fill of him as a baby, Damian showed up, looming ominously over Tim’s crib. Tim squeaked in horror at the purpose clear in Daman’s poisonous, green, eyes, and made to crawl away, but was held fast by the evil little gnome. “There is the possibility that this spell may not be reversible,” Damian muttered. “In that case, you will have to grow up all over again. This has been a blessing in disguise, the fates having given me the chance to forge a new relationship with you.” Tim cocked has tiny head, touched that Damian wanted to build on their relationship. “When I take the mantle of Batman, you shall be my new Robin!” Tim gawked as Damian went on to outline grandiose plans of how he and Tim would usher in an age of peace (he should have known not to let Damian read Orwellian Classics), and how with proper training, Tim would love his new elder brother and Batman. “...I shall have a high collar with my version of the cape and cowl. It offers more protection for my neck. For you, I shall keep the classic colour scheme, but we will be adding darker undertones. Here, try this on-” Tim was shocked when Damian pulled out a very small replica of the Robin costume of his imagining, and attempted to put Tim in it. Tim flailed, unwilling to indulge Damian’s fantasies of being his big brother, but failed, and was forced to look at his reflection in the mirror dressed in a modified Robin onesie. “There, see? Elegant and effective, offering brilliant range of movement and optimal protection. You will thank me for this later, Drake. In fact,” Damian paused, smirking, “you will love me, for I shall be the big brother that you never had.” Tim wailed at the thought, which brought Dick into the room. “Ooh, Bruce, look! Dami’s playing dress up with Timmy! They're so cute! And look at that!” Dick cried, pointing at Tim’s costume. “Did you make that, Dami?” Damian nodded happily. “It is for when I make Drake the Robin to my Batman.” “That's very sweet, Damian,” Bruce remarked. “I'm glad that you love your brother enough to make him Robin. I'm very proud of you.” “Thank you Father,” Damian said, preening. “You'll be a great big brother, Dami,” Dick cooed adoringly. “I know,” Damian remarked. “And with time, Drake will know it too.” Tim gulped, and willed the magic to fade faster from his body, if only to pound his little creep of a brother into the dirt for forcing him to play a role in his dystopian fantasies. ----------- “I'm sorry!” “Hmph.” “Timmy, I'm soooo soooorrrry!” “Hngh.” Jason buried his face in his hands as Dick continued to grovel. “Timmy, please! We didn't know that you could remember everything!” “You made me take bubble baths, Dick,” Tim reminded him sourly. “You made me dress up like a pumpkin, and then you took pictures! You powdered my butt. You touched my BUTT.” Dick slunk to the floor in horror while Jason gagged, prompting Tim to round on him. “And you! You put your entire uggo face in my stomach! You gave me raspberries! The gun-toting, feared anti-hero of Gotham, the Red Hood, gave me tiny tummy kisses!” Tim shrieked, pointing at a withering Jason, who promptly joined Dick in a pile of shame on the floor. In the chaos, Damian attempted to escape unnoticed, but was out of luck. “Don't think you're going to get away, you little creep,” Tim growled, snagging Damian by the waist. “‘You will learn to love me!?’ ‘I will show you what it means to be my Robin?’ What the hell, you little gremlin!?” “You should be honored, Drake!” Damian cried, attempting to scratch Tim’s eyes out. “I was going to make you into my perfect Robin!” “Oh my Gotham, that was creepy as fuck,” Jason mumbled quietly. “Dick, your little demon baby is a freaking creep.” “I was going to make you the best version of yourself, Drake!” “Dami,” Dick sighed, “you should love your brother in whatever form he is in. Tim loves you just as you are, don't you Timmy?” “I'd love him more if he was a hamster.” “Tim!” Unbeknownst to everyone, Bruce watched his children bicker from the safety of his room, and smiled at having his boys under one roof, together. Just as it should be. ---------

[toekneetv]

These Are the Ugliest Crossovers and SUVs of All Time

Not only did Karl Benz invent the car, he invented the ugly car in the same effort. His 1885 Benz Patent-Motorwagen wasn't exactly a looker, as it resembled a bicycle-tired kitchen chair. But you’ve got to start somewhere (we're talking, of course, about ugly vehicles, not cars in general). It would be many decades after the world was put on wheels for SUVs to appear, though not long after that ugliness caught up with that vehicle format, too. Pretty much everyone is (or should be) in agreement that Pontiac's Aztek, produced from 2001-2005, is the most repulsive of the breed. Nearly 20 years later, the misshapen crossover, with its narrow hips and insectilian face, remains the butt of jokes and the scapegoat for the death of the Pontiac brand. But is the Aztek really the ugliest SUV ever? Here we've gathered a list of 20 others that have a shot at the title; many also count among the greatest automotive flops of all time. To give these uggos a shot at fairness, then, we've arranged them in unbiased, alphabetical order.Pontiac

Acura ZDX (2010–2013)Our original road test of the 2010 Acura ZDX begins: "We're tempted to believe that ZDX stands for 'zero demand expected.'" Our clairvoyance proved accurate, and the fastbacked, bubblebutted, and birdnosed ZDX found few takers and lasted just three years in the U.S. Acura put this chopped-top version of its popular MDX out of misery in 2013, ironically right as today's "crossover coupe" trend, such as it is, was beginning to build steam behind BMW's X6 and the format spread elsewhere in that brand's lineup, as well as Mercedes-Benz's.Acura

Bentley Bentayga (2016–present)Regardless of what you’ve heard, Bentayga is not a Swahili word that means cross-eyed cow, but the mistake, were you to make it, is understandable. Despite the Bentley Bentayga's severe case of Strabismus, known more commonly as misaligned or crossed eyes, it has become is maker's best-selling model. It also is Bentley's first and only SUV.Chris Doane Automotive - Car and Driver

Buick Rendezvous (2002–2007)Sharing its platform and therefore its unsightly, lumpen-potato shape with the Pontiac Aztek, this poor mutant was doomed from the start. Although there is little resemblance between the Aztek and the Rendezvous, which was produced from 2002 to 2007, the Buick proved GM’s design studio could make many of the same mistakes twice.AARON KILEY

Chevrolet Trailblazer EXT/GMC Envoy XUV (2004–2005)In the early 2000s, GM’s design studio was apparently looking to corner the market on ugly SUVs, and it mostly succeeded. Two of its worst projects-besides, of course, the Aztek-were the extended-wheelbase versions of the Chevy Trailblazer and the GMC Envoy. GM stretched these rigs limo-style, adding 16-inches to their wheelbases, deforming the three-row SUVs into proportions so misshapen they have a fun house mirror quality. That the Envoy XUV's roof could be partially retracted (the part over the cargo area) for carrying tall things both made no sense and was completely overshadowed by the GMC's hideousness.

Chrysler Aspen (2007–2009)Based on the second-generation Dodge Durango, which itself looked like a Pug sucking on a lemon, the Aspen was the first SUV marketed by the Chrysler brand. That is pretty much where the fun facts end, unless you count the hybrid version Chrysler sold a few hundred of before pulling the plug. Anyway, the Aspen's overly chromed flanks go poorly with the overly flared wheel arches, while the grille appears to be pulled from a 1972 Mercedes and turned on its side. Somehow, the Chrysler still managed to be vapid and generally unattractive. Since most Americans that drive do have eyes, it was a flop.Chrysler

Dodge Nitro (2007–2012)Chrysler doubled down on hideous SUV design in 2007 by launching the Dodge Nitro, a rebadged and offensively squared-off version of the Jeep Liberty, right around the same time as the similarly bad Jeep Commander and Chrysler Aspen. Despite its overwrought flared fenders, the Nitro manages to look tall and narrow. Even more intriguing is its underbite face, which appears bearded in the style of C. Everett Koop.

Honda Crosstour (2010–2015)Honda's design team must have shaped the 2010 Crosstour on a bet. As in, "I bet we can make this new wagon/crossover look like a Platypus and the executives will still sign off on it." Well, they did and they did. The resultant Crosstour wasn't popular, but it sure was hunchbacked. After just five years and a single generation, the Crosstour was crossed out.Honda

Honda Element (2003–2011)The Honda Element seemed to be inspired by Picasso's Figure dans un Fauteuil, but it's no exercise in Cubism. Instead, it looks like a mail truck got busy with a Honda CR-V-actually, that's not far from the truth, as this relentlessly rectilinear SUV was based on the un-weird CR-V crossover. Later in its life cycle, the Element became slightly less repugnant, thanks to Honda's decision to paint more of its previously raw gray plastic bodywork.Honda

Hyundai Santa Fe (2001–2006)The original Hyundai Santa Fe is so frumpy it surely was designed by at least a dozen people who didn't talk to each other but enjoyed group play with clay like Patrick Swayze in the movie Ghost. The SUV's shape is wrought with odd concavities and bulges, like Play-Doh squeezed by a child's fist; from some angles it actually appears dented, as if its front fenders have been hit with a baseball bat.Hyundai

Infiniti QX56 (2004–2010)The first-generation Infiniti QX56 (now known as the QX80) was a chromed-up version of the Nissan Pathfinder Armada, meaning that both full-size SUVs were based on the Titan pickup truck. Infiniti fitted the massive QX56 with a car-like nose and elements from its sedans, creating a centaur-like monstrosity with an oddly domed roof and none of the mystical creature’s elegance or muscularity. Its immediate followup wasn't great either, with a beluga-like front end; a refresh for 2018 transformed the design into something actually good-looking.Infiniti

Isuzu Vehicross (1999–2001)If the Suzuki Vehicross has a calling card, it's that it appears to have more bottom than top, if that makes sense. It also predates the Pontiac Aztek. When the concept version debuted at the Tokyo Auto Show in 1993, we called it fish-faced. Later, we said the production version looks like an escapee from the set of "Battlestar Galactica." Hey, it's still the only SUV ever produced with vampire fangs.Isuzu

Jeep Compass (2007–2017)The design of the current Jeep Compass is clean, decently proportioned, and appealingly upscale (in sharp contrast to the rest of the little crossover, which is decidedly down-market). Mostly, this is because the second-generation Compass resembles a smaller Grand Cherokee. Too bad the original Compass was the exact opposite, with a bug-eyed face, weird roofline, and blocky lower-body detailing. It sold in strong numbers from 2007 to 2017, though for the life of us we can't figure out why.Jeep

Lamborghini LM002 (1986–1993)Cool can be ugly, and vice versa. And SUVs don’t come much cooler or much uglier than the Rambo Lambo. Angular to a flaw, the LM002 could use a curve or two. Its body panels are as flat as Fenway’s Green Monster. And the styling, such as it is, is applied liberally and seemingly without consideration. Hey, why not bend this that way, or toss an angle there? Originally designed for military use in the 1970s, Lambo built about 300 twelve-cylinder "civilian versions" from 1986 to 1993.Al Satterwhite

Lexus LX570 (2012–present)If there’s one vehicle that combines everything wrong with Toyota and Lexus design over the last 30 years, it’s the current LX570. The luxurious Lexus version of the venerable Toyota Land Cruiser is now in its third generation and has been homely ever since it debuted in 2008. The LX grew downright grotesque in 2012 when, to the already cosmetically challenged SUV Lexus began adding mutations of its spindle grille along with low-hanging rocker trim. Today’s version of the SUV seems to be a caricature drawing of itself, and, wait, isn't it supposed to be for off-roading?Chris Doane Automotive - Car and Driver

Lincoln MKT / Town Car (2010–present)Sometime around 2006, someone at Lincoln must have decided American luxury car buyers wanted a three-row SUV with the grin of a baleen whale and the appearance of having a loaded diaper. So began the development of what would become the 2010 Lincoln MKT (at least, so we think), which was based on the Ford Flex. A minivan-esque silhouette, grossly long overhangs front and rear, and, though we've already mentioned it, that awful grille are co-conspirators in the Lincoln's ugly play. Even though the MKT remains in production for fleets and hired-car services, it has never sold in respectable numbers; fewer than 3000 were bought last year.Lincoln

Nissan Juke (2011–2017)According to Nissan, the Juke's greenhouse resembles the visor of a motorcycle helmet and the small SUV’s curvy fenders evoke the so-called "Coke bottle" styling popular in the late 1960s. It sound pretty cool, but in reality the Juke’s design is a hot mess, exacerbated by a painfully overdesigned, frog-like front end the likes of which hadn’t been seen since the Aztek was put down in 2005. Some people actually find the bug-eyed design cute. We don't.Nissan

Nissan Murano CrossCabriolet (2011–2014)Allegedly, Nissan's now-former CEO Carlos Ghosn pushed the Murano CrossCabriolet into production because his wife liked the idea of it. Well, nobody (okay, almost nobody) else did. The two-door convertible crossover was a packaging disaster and visually challenged whether its cloth top was raised or stowed. Like the Aztek 10 years its senior, the Nissan became a punchline and it lasted just three years on the market before we had to say goodbye. Bizarrely, these days CrossCabriolets enjoy a cult following; meanwhile, Mr. Ghosn, for the first time, has bigger problems than being tangled up with the CrossCab's birth story.Nissan

Subaru B9 Tribeca (2007–2014)Subaru claimed the B9 Tribeca's front-end design was inspired by Alfa Romeo race cars of the 1930s. And you could see the resemblance if you squinted really, really hard. The look, which debuted in 2006, triggered more gag reflexes than sales-or, maybe, it was the three-row crossover's inexplicable name-and an updated model with a less controversial face was rushed into production for the 2008 model year. At the same time, Subaru mercifully dropped the "B9" part from the Tribeca's name. Apparently, this arbitrage was enough; the SUV lasted essentially unchanged until its discontinuation in 2014.Subaru

Suzuki X-90 (1995–1997)The next time someone tells you there is no such thing as a bad idea, show them a picture of the Suzuki X-90, a two-seat SUV with about the passenger and cargo space of a Mazda MX-5 Miata. Basically a chopped down Suzuki Sidekick, the X-90's tiny dimensions and odd proportions kept its appeal in check. With its narrow track, high stance and tall greenhouse it looked like roller-skate. It's of little surprise, then, that the Suzuki was only sold here from 1995 to 1997.

Suzuki XL-7 (2007–2009)Automotive designers are always looking to other art disciplines for inspiration, and the designers of the Suzuki XL-7's second generation divined their vision from the face of rock god Alice Cooper. At least, they must've-how else can you explain the drooping, curvy headlights on the unpopular SUV? The XL-7 also features-if that's the right word-an oddly long nose and too long a wheelbase and overall length for its narrow gait.Suzuki

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[owly-sims]

I’m in the process of remaking townies in Aurora Skies. Mostly, I’m trying to nip any uggos in the bud (ex. sims with really disproportionate faces, weird green-brown hair, etc). So this guy was born in game, and something about him...bothers me. He’s not *ugly* but something about his face makes me want to punch him.

And that’s when I realized...

He

Looks

Like

JOFFREY.

I think I’m going to poison this kid.