#and the fact that the family and friends do nothing when she goes outside wasted

[desire-for-madness]

I've been slowly passing my mornings by watching Deborah, cause I love the FL actress, but I think the alcohol dependancy should be addressed.

I know alcohol makes for a great plot line in kdramas, and even coming from a country where most people drink A LOT. But the amount of alcohol consumed by the main lead is concerning. She is drinking almost every evening, be it with friends or alone. Many of those it's obsene amounts, to which there are very serious consequences afterwards. That is an alcohol dependence which should get addressed. Drowning your sorrow once or twice fine, but drinking almost every evening is concerning. It's so often It's rare not to see her have a glass in her hand. And seeing how no one raises a question on whether it's the alcohol that is making her suffer the most (breakdowns, public scandals, becoming physical, etc.) is just odd. Especially in s.korea where the pressure to drink is so high and alcohol diseases as well, this show would be great to raise awareness about alcoholism by making the FL go sober or at least realise alochol isn't the answer. Cause right now it's just romantisizing someone drowning their sorrows in booze, and as someone that has seen people go through detox, health issues, relapse just because it was justified in the beginning, it's a bad way to go.

[mdhwrites]

I believe the villains in Owl House got screwed over because Dana disliked writing them. Belos was stripped of his complexity, ignoring his lore, Kikimora was reduced to a joke, and the Collector was transformed from a malicious, cruel person to an innocent kid who only wanted friends. It feels like Dana doesn’t enjoy writing villains.

So I don't think it's that Dana hates villains. I think it's that the TOH writers had no interest in writing an adventure series. Because of how much time is wasted, even in S2B, purely on romance and schoolkids being schoolkids (Them's the Breaks still has no point to exist after all) and how the villains are barely there outside of something to beat at the end of an episode, it kind of feels like the crew just wanted to do a magical school show which makes the supposed claim that Hexide was Disney mandated hilarious.

This actually also goes for the characters too though. A real adventure show would care about its power levels, its tricks and tools and actually showing the growth of our characters as fighters, not just as people. TOH... doesn't. Willow's big gimmick when she's first introduced is that she is incredibly powerful but can't control it. Then THREE EPISODES LATER, in the first episode that has Willow in it for more than a minute, it's resolved. Period. Until fucking S3. At that point, she is all powerful. Luz is all powerful by the beginning of S2, literally three episodes after she got her last glyph. Arguably, by Young Blood, Old Souls because she kicks the shit out of the entire Conformatorium in that one.

Even before then, most villains show up, cause a slight problem and then are quickly defeated after the character moment that the show setup with the conflict is resolved because their purpose is not as villains, it's just for the sake of it being an adventure show. Even the creatures of the Isles are for this purpose. That's also why most villains in TOH get like MAYBE three minutes of screen time at most. This would actually be okay if interesting things were being done with the characters but... Well, Luz goes through the same lesson multiple times in S1 about not taking cheats for magic and listening to Eda, almost ALL of King's plotlines in S1 are just repetitions of "Maybe don't see people as disposable pawns?" until S2 it's all "FAMILY!" until he's unrecognizable from his S1 counterpart. Then Gus has shades of self confidence issues in ALL of his episodes and never anything else. Then in S2 we have Hunter who is just mostly there in his episodes and learning constantly, "Maybe... Maybe friends are nice?" rather than actually challenging his world views and making him grow that way. That's also why I claim the show actively ships him with every girl his age.

It ironically makes the fact that TOH is so split in its identity feel like a necessity for the writers to have had more than at best two season's worth of material. With how much they recycle plot points, characters, etc. like that, of course it wastes time because it has no idea what to do with the amount of time it had.

Ignoring Belos' lore though is a different problem that has to do with his role as the big bad clashing with this, because he can't just be a slight obstacle to be overcome or else he looks like a joke like Kikimora or the coven heads came off as, but also that... Well, the show was ending.

So because they had nothing to do in S3 to keep audience interest because S2 had wrapped up too much, they leaned hard into saying "We have a complex villain, we swear," to keep people theorizing and invested in the show until the third special came out and the show went "JK LOL! We need to wrap this shit already. BYE!" Like they KNEW they didn't have the time, it's ENTIRELY on them to have focused so hard on Belos and then pulled the rug out from under everyone but...

But that's also just the normal trick of TOH. Here's the golden guard. No wait, he's a sad but mad boy, let's wrap this up. Here's a bully character who has deep ties to wanting the status quote to stay and should have a dozen anxieties about liking Luz. Never mind, none of that mattered, she's actually a good girl and has no issues getting into love besides the basic question of 'will she say yes?' Here is the ex-coven head for the EC who got betrayed and hurt by Belos while trying to just be a good sister fi- ISN'T HER TRAUMA HILARIOUS!?

If Dana disliked writing the villains, frankly, that means she disliked writing 90% of the show because most parts of the show aren't actually any better than the villains. They just got more screentime.

========

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[unhingedselfships]

Kimi also has weird coping, and avoids asking her fam, so she goes to other friends

CW : choking

In a distant way, he knew she had friends outside her family. 

Friends that also moved in circles of varying levels of questionable.

Some were fine, 'upstanding' citizens. 

Some wouldn’t be at all out of place in Purgatory.

He didn’t think much of it, as they’d never interfered with him or his time.

Until now.

…

While he did call, sometimes, or text, maybe, he just as often popped by without warning. 

He did have a key after all. Obviously he was always welcome.

Not that she ever locked the door.

Stupid girl.

Across the small courtyard, the beds of hydrangeas someone else was paid to keep up, and up the stairs to her probably-open door.

… Well then. He could be wrong sometimes, he supposed, as the door, was, in fact, locked.

Was she out? His mood soured at the thought.

Oh well, gave him time to be nosy again he supposed. 

cause that always worked out so well

Halfway down the hall he paused, having heard a soft gasp.

She wasn’t… busy, again, was she?

So annoyingly inconvenient. 

He was going to turn back and find a way to waste a bit of time before something else caught his attention.

“Just a little more, almost there,” a soothing voice. 

Male. 

And notably, one he didn’t know.

Curiosity set him moving back towards her room, quietly pushing the unlatched door open, and he noticed a few things rather all at once.

It was, indeed, a man he didn’t recognize. 

Slender, but well built. Pretty face. Sleepy eyes, in a striking color.

They were both fully clothed, not exactly what he’d expected.

He was straddling her hips, keeping her trembling form pinned down. 

Small, dainty, hands were wrapped around his wrists, grip slowly loosening. 

Wrists attached to much larger hands, wrapped around her pale, delicate, throat.

The indentations left by pressure, by thumbs.

Pink lips parted, a sigh.

Her eyes rolled back.

Well then.

He leaned against the door frame casually, "You kids having fun? Need me to get you anything? Water? Whips maybe?"

The man sat up, flicking the loose strands of his mostly tied back hair absently over his shoulder, blinking at him.

"Hmm, no, thank you. We're done here.” 

Kadokura hummed, faux disinterest, “Done with what, exactly? Just what are you kids into these days?”

“She just has me come by on occasion too, how does she put it? Make the brain go floaty? She should be back up in a few. … Probably. I haven't fucked it up yet anyway," he gave a careless shrug, "I wouldn't normally do this, even as a favor for a friend, but. She can be damn convincing, when she wants.”

Well, that was true enough.

Rolling slim shoulders the man climbed off the now prone girl, and made his way across the room.

"Let her know I took off, would you? It was good meeting you, Kadokura-san."

Kenshi blinked as the man walked past him, and absently noted the man was shorter than him, "You know who I am?"

"I make it my business to know all the most dangerous and powerful people in Japan," he replied, still walking away, "She hasn't said anything about you, if that's what you were concerned about. Well, she's said a lot about you, just not that you're you. No names or identifying information, just-" he laughed, "the most adorable gushing. Little Kimi-chan is absolutely besotted. Interesting to know you’re who she was talking about."

Kenshi fought to keep his face from flushing. He knew, but it was different for someone else to toss it out like that.

"Anyway, gotta bounce, I'm supposed to be at an appointment in,” he glanced at the clock on the wall as he passed, “an hour ago. Seeya.”

And he was out the door, without waiting for a reply.

Kadokura couldn't decide if he felt like he'd gotten more questions or answers.

Oh well. Nothing to do now but wait for her to come to.

And see if maybe anyone knew who the hell that was.

She came slinking out of the room maybe twenty minutes later.

"Um, my… friend. Texted me that you were here."

Friend, huh? Is that what she was calling it. 

"Sorry um. About. Yeah."

He blinked at her, "Why?"

She flushed, "It's um, just-"

He snorted, "I don't care why you do it, I wanted to know why you were apologizing. It doesn't matter to me what you do in your free time."

She sighed, relieved, "Thanks. Um-" she cut herself off, seemed a bit nervous.

He raised a brow, and gestured for her to continue.

"Can you not, um, mention this? To anyone else? They um. They don't know."

Both brows went up this time, an amused smile curling across his lips.

"My my, here I thought you told your beloved Daigo-chan everything?"

Something pained and sorrowful shot over her, 

"I-" she bit down on the word, "It's just- Sometimes I just need the world to go away for a bit, yanno?"

He nodded, "Turn it off and back on."

She breathed a laugh, settling on the couch next to him, worming her way under his arm and tucking herself against his side.

"Yeah. Pretty much."

His fingers instinctively made their way to her hair, softly caressing her scalp, soothing.

She nuzzled against his collar bone, breathing out a sigh.

"I just- I don't think they'd like it much."

"No, probably not," he answered.

She was quiet for a moment, "Should I tell them?"

"That's up to you isn't it? They're probably going to find out at some point, regardless."

She flinched, a soft "yeah".

They say in silence a little longer.

"Hey Kenshi?"

He hummed in askance.

"Thanks. For. Iunno. Bein' you."

Huffing he ignored the warmth in his face, "Stupid."

[cupidbedsy]

𝗳𝗶𝘁 𝗿𝗶𝗴𝗵𝘁 𝗶𝗻 | 𝘭𝘩43 ❀

➪ summary: where y/n helps dog sit for quinn's friend, fills in for jack's missing plus one, goes out on a night on the town, and gets into a fight with her family

➪ warnings: luke being sick, mentions of throwing, y/n and jack thinking their a horrible girlfriend/brother, parents fighting, reader has brother problems, crying

➪ word count: 5.8k

➪ file type: girlfriend series fic - part three (yay but sad)

➪ sunny's notes: i can't believe this is the last girlfriend series fic :( i did write two bonus scenes for you so... if you didn't see, i am wanting to do requests/blurbs based off of these! just let me know which girlfriend you want and want scenario or whatever you want them to react to (ex: 'how would quinn's girlfriend react to jack getting hurt' or 'how would quinn and luke react to jack's girlfriend buying them gifts') i really hope you guys are excited about this bc i am too! i am so in love with this series and you guys have no idea how happy i am that you guys like it.

© cupidbedsy ; do not copy, repost, or translate my work and designs on any other website or here

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⟹ quinn and the puppy-sitter

While he had initially agreed to dog sit his friend’s dog, he was now seriously regretting it. It wasn’t that he didn’t like dogs, because he did, but it was the fact that he would have spent hours upon hours alone in a house by himself. He watched the clock, dreading it as the seconds ticked by until he had to leave. That was until an idea sparked in his mind.

He always knew that his brother’s girlfriend loved puppies, it was the one thing that she made sure to tell everyone as soon as she met anyone. He was lucky enough that she lived just a few minutes away from his friend's house, wasting no time in calling her.

“Hey.”

“Hey, Quinner. What’s up?”

“Nothing much. Are you busy?”

Y/n put away one of her shirts, moving around the bedroom, “No, why?”

“Well I have this friend, and he sort of asked me if I wanted to dog sit, and I-”

“Can I come?”

He chuckled, nodding, ���That’s the reason I called. Didn’t want to go over there by myself and you’re like the biggest dog person I know.”

“Yay, okay! Text me the address and I’ll meet you there.”

Ten minutes later, y/n left her house and practically skipped down the street to where Quinn had said his friend lived. By the time she arrived, Quinn’s car was in the driveway and he was standing on the porch on his phone. She smiled and walked the rest of the way up the steps, pausing once he finally looked up.

“Okay, her name is Pepper and she’s a black lab, I don’t remember how old they said she was.”

“Awwww.” Y/n bounced on her feet, waiting for him to open the door. She could hear the faint scratching on the wood from inside the house and only melted even more.

As soon as Quinn opened the door, a dog ran out and straight into y/n’s arms, who smiled and picked the puppy up with no effort. She pet Pepper softly, speaking random words in a cooing manner. Meanwhile, Quinn walked inside the house to read the note his friends left, waiting for her to follow. She came in a few minutes later, the puppy trailing happily behind her.

“So what do we have to do?” Y/n took the seat next to him at the island, swinging her legs back and forth as much as she could. 

“Just feed her in an hour or two and then take her outside when she needs to. That’s it, they said we could watch TV if we wanted to.”

She nodded and looked down at the puppy in between the two chairs who was now looking up at Quinn with big eyes, “Aw Quinner, she wants you to hold her!”

He chuckled, “How do you know?”

“I just do, here.” She hopped off the chair and picked the dog up, handing it to her boyfriend’s brother. His eyes widened as he now held the puppy, running a finger on the top of his hand.

“Where’s the bathroom?”

“Oh down the hall and to the right.”

A few minutes later, y/n came back and saw Quinn now sitting on the ground in the living room, playing with Pepper. She sat down beside them, turning the TV on and shifting her focus between the puppy and the screen. Once she found something to watch, she reached into the bucket of dog toys and pulled one out, excited to play with her newfound friend.

“How long have you liked dogs?”

“My whole life, really. Actually, when I was one I apparently was so scared by a dog that I fell over.” He couldn’t help but laugh, “No way.”

“Oh yeah, baby me was terrified of dogs. That was until I turned three or four and we got a puppy of our own. His name was Dino, my brother named him.” She shook her head before continuing, “He was a husky. He died when I was a junior in high school, so five years ago?”

“Oh, I’m sorry.”

“It’s okay. We got a dog right before I went to college which sucked, of course, but she’s fun. Her name’s Wolvie.”

He raised an eyebrow, “What I was going to Michigan, what did you expect?” 

He laughed and the two continued to play with Pepper before she spoke up again, “How’s Luke?”

“Good, won’t stop talking about you though.” She blushed and looked down quickly, “Really?”

“Yep. No offense but if I have to hear one more word come out of his mouth about you I might lose it. Which basically means, can you please come see him soon?”

“Is he home tonight?”

“I think so.”

“Alright, I’ll come back to your place. I just have to go home and grab my car.”

He shook his head, “I’ll drive you. I’m sure Luke would be okay taking you home too.” She looked hesitant at first but nodded once she saw the look on his face, a look that only an older brother could have. 

A few hours later, his friends came home and the two of them were able to leave soon after that. Driving home with Quinn was an experience, they had the radio low and the windows rolled down slightly, an experience that was completely different from her older brother.

“You know, I don’t think my brother ever let me roll the windows down in summer, it was always the AC cranked and windows shut, it was his one rule. And he didn’t allow me to pick the music.”

“Well, I couldn’t care less if you have the window down and play whatever you want. I only choose when I’m by myself or Jack and Luke are in the car with me.”

She nodded, “Plus, you’re a better driver than him. I always feel like we’re gonna crash when I’m with him.”

His eyes widened slightly in concern, “That bad?”

“Meh, he just likes getting from point A to point H as quickly as he can.” She shrugged, “I’ve gotten used to it.”

They pulled into his driveway and as they approached the door, Quinn told her to wait outside. She could hear his voice echo through the house, “Luke, I brought you a surprise!”

“Really? Is it food? Because if it’s not food, I don’t want it.”

Y/n rolled her eyes, of course, he was worried about food. She saw Quinn’s hand usher her into the house and she frowned slightly as she stepped through, “Not even me?”

Luke perked up and instantly ran over to her, hugging her tightly, “Just kidding. This is the only surprise I want.” 

He pulled away and smiled at her, kissing her head, “Hi baby.”

“Hi Lukey.” Quinn only smiled fondly at them, walking off to his bedroom. 

❛ ━━･❪ ❁ ❫ ･━━ ❜

⟹ jack and the plus one

Jack was panicking, he had less than an hour to find a plus one to attend an event he had to go to. He hadn’t had one originally but he was just going to be hanging out with Luke the whole night so he didn’t have to worry about bringing someone. And then, Luke got sick. His head was hurting and he couldn’t even get up, he was miserable. 

Y/n had come over earlier, trying to take care of him, and it was only when she was talking about having nothing to do so she could take care of Luke was when it hit him. He immediately ran into his brother’s room to see him and his girlfriend sitting on the bed, watching something on TV, “Hey.”

The two of them looked over at the boy, Luke being the one to talk, “Hi? What do you want?”

“Can I borrow your girlfriend?”

“Borrow my what?”

“Your girlfriend.”

“Okay, hi hello! I’m right here and I have a name, Jackson.”

“That’s not my name.”

“At least I used one.”

“Okay okay, anyway. Why do you want to borrow my girlfriend?”

“For the event, I really don’t want to go alone.”

“I don’t really understand what that has to do with her.”

“I want her to go with me.” He looked at the girl, “Please.”

“I don’t know Jack…” She shifted uncomfortably in Luke’s arm, avoiding his gaze.

Luke looked down at her and then back up at his brother, “Up to her.”

“I don’t know anyone.”

Due to not being able to see Luke since he went to New Jersey, y/n hadn’t gotten a chance to meet any of the team. Now that she got the chance, she wasn’t so sure if she wanted to without her boyfriend. She wasn’t uncomfortable with Jack, it was more the idea of having to the team for the first time and being introduced as Luke’s girlfriend and he was nowhere to be found.

Jack immediately pouted and gave the two his best puppy dog eyes, “Please please please please.”

“Jack she said she didn’t want to-”

“It’s okay, I’ll go.”

“Really?” The two exclaimed in different tones, Jack’s happy and Luke’s incredulously. 

She nodded and looked over at Luke, “I’ll be okay, finally get to meet your team.”

Now it was Luke’s turn to pout, “But I won’t be there.”

“I’ll take care of her, Lukey. Now c’mon, we’ll leave in an hour.”

Jack ran out of the room, practically bouncing off the walls and the couple looked at each other, “I know you said you wanted to introduce me to the team, but I really couldn’t say no to his face. It was too cute.”

“Cuter than mine?”

“Never.” She gave him a kiss on the cheek before getting up, “If you need anything let me know and I’ll make Jack drive me home.”

After she got ready, she walked back out into his room and Luke let out a low whistle, “You’re going out like that? Without me?”

“Sorry, Lukey. But I’ve been waiting for this day forever and I wanted to look good.” He pouted again and reached his arms out for her.

She giggled as she made her way over to him, standing at the edge of the bed as he hugged her, “Make sure to tell them you’re mine.”

Y/n ran a hand through his hair, “Of course. Now-”

“Y/n! Come on, we’re going.”

“Need anything before I go?” He shook his head.

“Alright bye, Lukey. I love you.”

“I love you too.”

Y/n walked out of the room and into the foyer where Jack was standing. He smiled at her and opened the door, “You look pretty.”

She blushed and looked down, “Thank you.”

The two made their way down to Jack’s car, riding in silence to the venue. She fidgeted with her fingers as Jack parked the car and he glanced over at her, “You’ll be fine.”

“I know, I know. It’s just hard without Luke here.”

He frowned, “You know, you didn’t have to come. I hope I didn’t seem like I forced you to.” 

Y/n shook her head, “No of course not, I wanted to come, believe me.”

Jack smiled and got out of the car, making his way over to her side to open the door. He helped her out and then offered her his arm, “Let’s do this, little sis.”

“Little sis?”

“C’mon, we all know it’s coming.” She threw her head back and laughed, “Not for a while I hope. I’m still in school and he still lives with you.”

The two walked into the venue, immediately greeted by the crowd of people. She took a deep breath before nodding up at Jack, allowing him to lead them further into the room. Jack scanned the crowd, looking for the easiest person to introduce her to, “I’ll let you meet Nico first, he is our captain.”

Her eyes widened, “Well I’m glad you're here then.”

“What why?”

“I once told Luke I thought Nico was cute, way before I started dating him, and he ignored me for almost the whole day.”

Jack laughed and urged her further, trailing slightly behind, “I am not surprised. But you’re not wrong, Nico does-”

“Have a great ass? I know.”

“Not what I was going to say, but that works too.”

The two approached the Swiss man, waiting patiently for him to finish the conversation he was in, “Jack!”

“Hey, man.” The two hugged and Nico’s eyes drifted to the girl beside him, “And who is this?” 

She blushed under his gaze and looked down, “This is Luke’s girlfriend.”

“Luke’s girlfriend, wow.” She looked back up and stuck her head out, “I’ve been referred to as his girlfriend this whole day, but my name is actually y/n.”

“Nice to meet you, y/n. So where is your boyfriend?”

“He’s sick and Jack begged me to come tonight so I gave in.”

“Puppy dog eyes?”

“Yes, how’d you know?”

“He uses them to get out of things way too often.”

Jack shrugged from beside them, “It works. I’m gonna go get a drink, do you want anything?”

“Just water, please.” He nodded and walked away, leaving her with his captain.

“C’mon, I’ll introduce you to the rest of the team.”

By the time Jack got the two drinks and walked back over to the two of them, she was now surrounded by Dawson, Nico, Jesper, Erik, Curtis, Timo, and Jonas, laughing at something someone said. He looked at them in amusement, coming to stand behind her, “Here’s your water.”

“Thanks, Jack.”

“So Jack, who is this? Nico wouldn’t tell us until you got back.” Jesper raised an eyebrow at his teammate.

“This is Luke’s girlfriend, y/n.”

Half of the group choked on their drinks, coughing a little as a result. Y/n looked around the group, confused, “What?”

“Lukey’s girlfriend? No way, man.”

“What?” She protested a little.

“Little Hughesy has some game.”

“Will someone please tell me what you all are talking about?”

Curtis finally looked at her, smiling, “You’re dating, Luke? The Luke who for the life of him cannot talk to a girl even if it would save his life?”

“Yeah, he was like that when I met him. I think that’s just a Hughes thing though.” She shrugged, risking a glance up at Jack who whined, “Hey.”

“Well you all are wrong, Luke has the most game out of all of them.”

“There’s no way in hell.”

“Oh trust me, when Luke wants to,” her eyes went wide with amusement, “He can.”

They all cringed a little, “I do not want to know.” She grinned, taking a sip of her water. 

Without even a glance at her phone, y/n was able to make it through the whole night of meeting her boyfriend’s phone. They were all super nice to her and Jack had been a great support whenever she had gotten nervous or uncomfortable with a topic of conversation. By the time the two of them had left, Luke had texted and called her over and over again. 

Getting back into his car, y/n looked at her phone and frowned when she saw the notifications, “What’s wrong?”

She looked at Jack, “I don’t know, Luke called me like ten times.”

“Ten? We were only there for a couple of hours, maybe three.”

“Yeah, I know. Let me call him back.

Jack had only heard her side of the conversation, “Hi Lukey.” “What’s wrong?” “I’m sorry.” “Yeah.” “We’ll be home soon. “I love you.”

He turned the car on and backed out of his parking spot, starting to drive towards the exit, “What was that about?”

“He threw up and was hoping I could come home.” She groaned in frustration, “I should’ve looked at my phone, I told him I would’ve made you drive me home if he needed anything.”

“Hey, it’s okay. He’s 21, he can handle himself.”

“Yeah, I know. I just feel horrible.” He frowned at her, this time no trace of playfulness hidden in it or his eyes.

“If you’re thinking you’re a bad girlfriend, you shouldn’t be. If anything I’m a bad brother, I took my little brother’s girlfriend away from him when he was sick just to go to an event because I was too nervous to go alone.”

She shook her head, “He adores you, trust me. He won’t be mad at you.”

“I don’t know, Luke has the ability to hold a grudge for a long time.”

“Trust me, I know. But you’re not a horrible brother.”

“And you’re not a horrible girlfriend.”

❛ ━━･❪ ❁ ❫ ･━━ ❜

⟹ quinn, jack, and the night on the town

Jack had been begging Quinn to go out with him since he woke up that morning, complaining he needed some new clothes for whatever reason, Quinn hadn’t been bothered to listen to him. It was one thing Quinn detested the most, shopping with Jack. He could be out for hours and still be in the same two stores that they started in. 

Y/n walked out of Luke’s room, followed by him on his phone. They talked quietly, y/n watching as Luke threw on his shoes, “I’ll see you later.”

“Yeah, drive safe.” Luke kissed her head, “I love you.”

“I love you too.”

“Wait wait wait, where are you going?” Luke eyed his older brother carefully, “With my friends, why?”

“No, I don’t care where you’re going.” Jack groaned, “Where’s y/n going?”

“Home, why?”

Luke stood slightly in front of her, crossing his arms over his chest as Jack looked back at Quinn, “If y/n goes with, will you?”

Quinn raised an eyebrow but nodded slowly, “Yeah.”

“Where am I going?”

“Shopping!”

She looked at her boyfriend and then at his brothers before nodding, “Okay. Only if you buy me food.”

“Deal.” Jack grinned at her and it was Luke’s turn to groan, “You’re hanging out with more than you hang out with me.”

“Tough shit, Lukey boy.”

Quinn, Jack, and y/n drove to the mall, all talking about random things. When they got there, Jack led them to the store he wanted to go to and Quinn looked at her, “Good luck.”

“Why?”

“We once spent three hours in one store. Three.”

She let out a low whistle, “Longer than me. Well let’s hope it doesn’t last that long, maybe I could help?”

“Jack is the pickiest person ever so no offense, but I highly doubt you would make a-”

“Hey, Jack, do you like this?” Y/n pulled out a shirt from one of the racks and Jack immediately nodded when he saw it, “Yeah, actually.”

“Magic.”

They spent the next thirty minutes shopping for things, y/n’s picks hitting every time. Quinn had never been so relieved to go shopping with someone who helped Jack. They were able to get in and out within an hour and headed to two more stores afterward. When they got back to the car, she sighed and leaned against the seat, “You owe me food.”

“You deserve food, I’ve never been able to get Jack to shop that quickly.”

“What can I say? I have a talent.”

When they sat down at the restaurant, she immediately started a conversation, one she had been waiting to start forever, “So I need the scoop on Luke. All the embarrassing stuff. Like now.”

“Okay?”

“It’s important. When he met my brother for the first time, he told them about the time I got locked in a bathroom.”

“You got locked in a bathroom?” Jack snorted, taking a drink.

“Shut up. He locked me in there, it’s not like I did it myself. But that is completely beside the point, I need everything you have on Luke, right now.”

And so they did, they spent an hour and a half going back and forth sharing the funniest and most embarrassing stories they could remember about their brother. Y/n had laughed and laughed at each new story, making a point to remember them so she could use them against her boyfriend later. If her brother could tell him stories, why couldn’t his brothers tell her stories?

However, her feeling of winning slowly faded away as Jack and Quinn asked for stories about her childhood, “No.”

“Oh come on, we just spent however long embarrassing Luke for you, the least you could do is tell us one story about your childhood.”

She blinked at them before nodding, “Fine. Let me think.”

It was hard coming up with stories from her childhood, there weren’t many that stuck out to her. The only one she could really think of was the time her brother locked her in the bathroom which they had already discussed. But eventually, she sighed, “I was a very gullible child. So I allowed my brother to convince me to go down a slide on a chair.”

“You what?”

“Yeah, I broke my arm.” She shrugged, taking a bite of the few remaining fires she had on her plate. Jack and Quinn shook their heads, not believing what she had said. 

“I’m sorry, there is no way you let him convince you to do that.”

“I told you, I was a very gullible kid. You barely had to do anything to convince me. He also convinced me that he was born in Canada, which is very stupid looking back on it.”

By the time they left all three of them felt satisfied with the stories they had told, and when they got back home, Jack and Quinn shared a shit-eating grin at their younger brother before going to their rooms. 

“What was that about?”

“Let’s just say, I have a lot on you now so you can’t use the bathroom story anymore.”

❛ ━━･❪ ❁ ❫ ･━━ ❜

⟹ y/n and the family fight

It was never often that her family fought, at least this bad. She had been home for the summer and told them that she was going to go out with some friends due to them being in town for a couple of days. She assumed that they remembered and left after saying a brief goodbye to them, getting in her car, and driving to where she was going to meet her friends.

However, when she got back home, her parents were furious and her brother was standing off to the side, trying not to interfere with what was about to happen. She stood in front of them nervously, waiting for them to say something but quickly realized that they weren’t going to be the first ones to speak, “Hi.”

“You leave for four hours without telling us you’re leaving and all you have to say for yourself is ‘hi’?”

She mentally groaned in frustration, knowing that this was going to happen. Her brother couldn’t help but snicker and as soon as their parents heard it, he was sent to his room. She sat down after her parents instructed her to and listened to thirty minutes of her parents ‘talking loudly’ at her, accusing her of things she didn’t even do. 

Once they were done, they allowed her to go up to her room where she let silent tears fall. She would’ve been able to get over it, hell she was 21 and she was still getting yelled at by her parents for the most idiotic things. She sat in her bed, staring at the wall as she listened to the white noise around her. She was startled once she heard her parents' voices again, but this time they were yelling at each other. 

That was when she realized that no matter how old you get, listening to your parents fight with each other never gets easier. After twenty minutes of fighting, she grabbed her keys and walked downstairs, hesitantly standing at the bottom of the steps. Her mom noticed her first, her face softening no longer mad at her, “Yes honey?”

“Can I go over to Luke’s house?” She had never heard her voice so quiet and vulnerable before, at least not in a long time. 

Her mom sighed and spared a glance at her husband before nodding and smiling weakly, “Yeah, just text us once you’re on your way home, okay?”

Y/n nodded and quickly ran out of her house, resting her back against her front door. She could hear the fighting resume and she wasted no time in getting in her car and driving away, but this time to Luke’s house. 

She parked on the side of the road, walking slowly up to the house. She really should’ve thought this plan through before she did it. She was nervous about whether or not she should’ve texted him or if he was home or not. She reached the front steps and realized it was too late to turn back once her fist hit the wood of their door. 

Jack opened the door with his usual boyish grin, but it turned down to a frown once he realized the expression on her face, “Y/n?”

“Hey, um… Is Luke here?” He shook his head softly, “He went out with some of his friends about an hour ago. Did you need something?”

She bit her lip, “Uh, no. It’s okay actually. I’ll just text him to tell me when he gets home. Thanks though, Jack. I’ll see you later.” 

She walked back down the steps and was halfway to her car when she heard her voice being called, “Y/n?”

“Yeah?”

“Come inside.” Locking eyes with him, she nodded and walked back to the house and inside, taking her shoes off. 

He led her to the living room where he and Quinn had been sitting with a bucket of popcorn and a random movie on. Quinn smiled up at her and quickly blinked away the confusion in his eyes as he heard her voice, “Hi.”

He scooted over, allowing her to sit on the couch in between the two of them, “I’m sorry for coming over unexpectedly. I was just hoping Luke would be here.”

“It’s okay, you want to tell us what’s going on?” 

She looked between them hesitantly before speaking, “It’s really nothing, I’m just overreacting probably.”

“Trust me, I’m probably the most over-dramatic person on this planet. And I can tell by the look on your face that whatever has you like this is probably warranted.”

“I got yelled at.” The two furrowed their eyebrows and she sighed, “I know, I’m 21 and I’m crying because I got yelled at. That’s not the reason I’m like this though. Well partly.”

The two nodded, urging her to continue, “After they yelled at me they started fighting with each other, and I- I finally realized that as I get older, I think their fighting just hurts worse.”

She couldn’t help but sob at the realization, curling into a ball on the couch. Quinn and Jack shared a look before Quinn wrapped her into a hug, his older brother instincts kicking in. Hearing someone who was like his little sister cry hurt more than he could ever imagine and he just wanted to make her feel better. Jack felt the same and ran to grab one of Luke’s sweatshirts and some ice cream from the freezer, coincidentally her favorite flavor. 

As he reapproached the couch, y/n had slightly uncurled herself from Quinn’s grasp and was wiping her tears off with her hand a little harshly. She chuckled dryly, “This is so embarrassing.”

“No, it’s not, I’ve had fans cry in front of me before.” Quinn smacked him on the back of his hand from behind her causing her to giggle a little. 

The two smiled and Jack sat down next to her handing her her boyfriend’s sweatshirt, “I figured this would probably help.”

“Thank you, Jack.” She quickly threw the hoodie on, snuggling slightly into the fabric. 

He then handed her the bowl of ice cream, “I also found this in the freezer. I think Luke bought it just in case you came over one day.”

She smiled down at it, noticing the ice cream was her favorite, “He sure does know how to make me smile even when he’s not here.”

They sat in silence before she looked between the two, “Thank you, guys.”

“Of course, we’ll be here if you ever need us. What are big brothers for.”

“We’re not even related.” She laughed and sniffled, wiping her tears still. 

They shrugged, “We know, but like I said the night of that event we went to, it’ll happen eventually.”

Quinn handed her the remote, allowing her to scroll through the channels or go onto Disney or Netflix. She settled on one of her favorite movies to watch with Luke and leaned back on the couch. When she was done with the ice cream, she stood to put it up in the sink but Jack grabbed it from her grasp and placed it on the table, “We’ll do it later.”

She nodded softly, curling up in the blanket that rested on her lap. Quinn eyed her carefully, “Tired?”

“Just a little.”

“You can sleep if you want to, we’ll wake you up when Luke gets back.”

“Okay.” And within minutes, she was asleep. Her head fell to the side landing on Quinn’s shoulder who just smiled down at her. 

❛ ━━･❪ ❁ ❫ ･━━ ❜

•❅ 《 𝘉𝘖𝘕𝘜𝘚 𝘚𝘊𝘌𝘕𝘌 》 ❅•

The two got home and without even waiting for Jack, y/n ran upstairs to their apartment as quickly as she could, immediately going into Luke’s room. It was dark and she could barely see the outline of Luke’s body in the bed. She walked over quietly, kicking her heels off delicately. She kneeled on the bed, reaching out to card through his curls, “Lukey.”

She received no response and murmured his name once more. This time he stirred a little, groaning and protesting at being woken up, “I’m sorry baby. We’re home.”

He blinked his eyes open and looked up at her, smiling softly, “Hi.”

“Hi, baby. How are you feeling?”

He shook his head and untangled one of his arms to wrap around her waist. He pulled her close to him, burying his head into her stomach as she continued to kneel on the bed. She sat there for a few moments, running her hand through his hair. Her dress started to become tight and uncomfortable and she whispered, “Can I go change, Luke? I’ll be right back, I promise.”

He shook his head and only tightened his hold on her as much as he could, “Stay.”

“I will after I go change. This dress is a little too uncomfortable to sleep in.”

She smiled when he loosened his grip and got off the bed to change as quickly as possible. She came back with a damp washcloth and sat down on the bed, letting Luke pull her back to him. He curled up into a ball in front of her, his head resting in her lap. She was thankful that she threw on one of his sweatshirts because she knew she wouldn’t be able to pull up the blankets all night with him in her lap. 

She ran the washcloth over his forehead, ignoring his slight moans of protest. She leaned over the bed to make sure there was a bucket on the side and she sighed in relief when there was one. Despite Luke wearing two sweatshirts and a pair of sweatpants, he was shivering and only curled up into her more. She frowned again, pulling the washcloth away, “Alright, Lukey. We gotta take these sweatshirts off, you’re burning up.”

“No.” He protested, “‘m cold.”

“I know baby, I do. But you’re not going to get better if we don’t get your temperature down.” He sighed but knew she was right, so he allowed her to pull both of his sweatshirts over his head before curling back into her.

“Alright, I’ll be here, you can go to sleep now.”

“Promise you aren’t leaving?”

“I promise, sweetheart.”

“Okay.” 

It took him a matter of seconds to go back to sleep and y/n sat there peacefully, staring at the wall lost in her thoughts. Jack opened the door and her gaze shifted over to where he was standing, “How’s he doing?” 

“Not good, I think his temperature has gotten worse. If it’s still bad tomorrow, we’re probably gonna have to take him to the doctor.”

He nodded, “You going to be okay?”

“My legs might go numb, but if he wants to sleep here, I’m not going to  say anything.”

❛ ━━･❪ ❁ ❫ ･━━ ❜

•❅ 《 𝘉𝘖𝘕𝘜𝘚 𝘚𝘊𝘌𝘕𝘌 》 ❅•

The door clicked open and Luke walked into the house, still trying to figure out if he just imagined y/n’s car outside their house. He took off his shoes and walked into the living room finding his brothers and his girlfriend sleeping on the couch. He raised an eyebrow and went to go to his bedroom but stopped when he heard his name. He looked back and saw Quinn standing up, “She came over about an hour or two ago.”

“Oh, I wish she would’ve texted me, I would’ve come home.”

“She got into a fight with her parents.” Luke’s eyes softened and his lips turned downwards, “Oh.”

“She was pretty torn up, we got her one of your hoodies and some ice cream and then she crashed. I’ll wake Jack up and you guys can have the couch.”

“Thank you.”

Quinn lightly shook Jack awake, who jumped in response. He was immediately shushed and his eyes followed his older brother’s finger to where Luke was standing. He nodded and got up, the two of them making their way to their respective bedrooms. The younger one sat down on the couch, running a hand through his girlfriend’s hair. Y/n stirred slightly and blinked her eyes open slowly. Her eyes focused on her boyfriend, shifting closer to him, “Hi.”

“Hey, sweetheart. I heard you got into a fight again?”

She nodded and closed her eyes as Luke ran his fingers through her hair. He frowned but knew that she wouldn’t want to talk about it much not only because she was asleep, but mainly because he knew she would lose it and be embarrassed even more than she had been earlier. He let her sleep in her lap and y/n was grateful for it. 

They never needed to share any words when something was wrong, they just knew what it was or when it happened and were there for each other. Whether it was Luke when he was sick or y/n when she got into a fight with her family, the two were by each other’s side as soon as they needed to be. And that’s what made them fit together.

© cupidbedsy ; do not copy, repost, or translate my work and designs on any other website or here

[letarasstuff]

Unbreakable Bond

(A/N): This is based on this post and this tiktok

Summary: A big age gap between Aaron's children doesn't have to mean that they are unable to form a strong bond

Warnings: Mentions of Haley's death and failed relationships

Wordcount: 1.8k

✨Masterlist✨

_________________________________

His life took turns Aaron never expected. It’s not the “Oh, mh, well that was unexpected”-type of turns, I talk about the “God played Cards Against Humanity with angels and decided to make it happen for someone”-type. But looking back he would not want to change a thing.

After Haley and Beth he was convinced that God, the Universe, something out there shared the opinion that romantic love isn’t the right thing for him and Aaron accepted that fact. Even more when he and Jack went into witness protection. I mean, when you are worried about the life of your family being in danger because of a stalker, you don’t think about the beautiful neighbor, who lives next door, right? Right?

Well, without going into too much detail, Hotch did think about her and she about him and vice versa. Everything went good until Aaron received the message that the team found the stalker and that it was safe to come back. He decided to come clean to his girlfriend. They talked about the possibility of moving back to Quantico.

In the end they decided in favor of the move, the final argument was the surprising announcement of her being pregnant. Hotch wants to raise their youngest where his and Jack’s roots are located. But he decides against taking a position at the BAU, instead taking a desk job in order to be more at home. He also has the opportunity to work from home after little (Y/N) was born and continues to do so until she is old enough to go to Kindergarten. Even then he takes two days the week where he stays home. Aaron learned from his decisions and mistakes he made in the past and wants to live up to them and be a better father and husband than before.

And Hotch keeps it to this day, six years later. It’s (Y/N)’s first day of school, while Jack just graduated high school and goes off to college in a few weeks. Even though they have an age gap from twelve and a half years, their parents are sure there are no other siblings with such a strong bond.

Ever since his baby sister’s birth Jack is her biggest supporter, protector and friend. Her first word was his name, though it was more of a “ACK!”, but that’s the best nickname he ever got. As soon as (Y/N) was old enough to comprehend the concept of movies, he introduced her to Star Wars. Since then lightsaber wars out of cardboard pipes are not uncommon. Last Halloween they even dressed up as Chewbakka and Han Solo. You get three guesses on who was who.

“JACK!” (Y/N) runs into her big brother’s room with an excited expression on her face. “Daddy promised to buy me a real lightsaber after I read ten books! With lights and sounds and all! Isn’t that cool?” Jack smiles. Aaron did a similar thing with him. For a certain amount of books he got a reward they discussed beforehand. This way he felt motivated to read and improved writing and reading skills.

“This is awesome. I think that means we have to go book shopping together, what do you think?” (Y/N) is not only the cool kid that has an older brother, she is also the cool kid, whose older brother has a drivers license, a car and a part time job. She nods with big eyes, speechless, because the offer sounds like heaven to her. Getting books and one on one time with Jack after he was really busy with school for weeks? This has to be heaven.

“Ok, then you put your outside clothes on and I’ll tell Dad about our plan.” At that the little girl rushes to her room, not wanting to waste any more time. Jack makes his way down to the kitchen, where Aaron wipes the table from lunch down.

“Dad, I take (Y/N) to this bookstore in DC and we’ll probably go eat ice cream after that. Is that alright?” Hotch looks up at his son. It still feels like yesterday as he told Haley that Gideon is a big no as a baby name. Now he is all grown up and just a few weeks away from the next big chapter in his life.

“Of course, just let me get my wall-” Jack cuts him off. “No need, I want to use this as a kind of goodbye thing. At least until Thanksgiving.” Aaron knows what he means. It’s his last day before he goes off to college and just a couple more until the first classes begin. The family still hasn’t told their youngest exactly what’s going on. Else she would refuse to go to school and go on with her day, insisting on using all the time they have until Jack drives off.

Two hours later the siblings leave the bookstore, both of them having a bag in their hands. Of course Jack's heavier, but both he and the cashier assured (Y/N) that they lift the same amount of weight.

“Uncle Spence will be excited when I tell him that I read Harry Potter, he told me so many good things about it”, the girl gushes. Jack nods, indicating that he is listening. Of course they also picked books that are not that advanced. Still, no sister of his shall grow up without knowing the beauty of the wizarding world. Also, secretly he is hoping for her to turn out as nerdy as he is so they get more things to talk about. His next step is superheroes, especially the Marvel ones.

They converse until they get to an ice cream parlor and order both their usuals. “Do you think you are ready for me to tell you something important?” The older one asks after they sit down at a table. (Y/N) nods, confusion taking over her face.

“Uhm, you know how I graduated from high school? I’m done with school, but I want to get a degree, but for that I have to go to college. It’s pretty far away so I can’t come home for a few months. But I’m back home when Thanksgiving is and also for Christmas.” It doesn’t matter what Jack says, a sad frown has formed on the little one’s face. “Oh. And after Christmas, will you leave again?” He nods and explains when he is off from college and when not.

“We can always skype and write letters. How does that sound? And when you get your first phone, we can even text.” That (Y/N) lights up a bit. For her first year of school she got a stationary set and is eager to use it to this day.

“I’m going to miss you so much”, she says hugging her big brother. Jack pats her back. “I’ll miss you, too.”

The goodbye the next day is a heartfelt matter. Everybody cries, especially (Y/N). She can’t fathom a scenario where her brother isn’t there for her all the time.

The following weeks are also hard for the family. The youngest refuses to sleep alone for the first three days after Jack’s leave. She is more closed off and mainly just does her school work or reads the books he bought for her. By the time Thanksgiving is only away for another two weeks, (Y/N) has read through all of them at least two times.

Her father already ordered the lightsaber he promised her. Unfortunately shipping takes several months, so the little girl still has to wait patiently for her reward to arrive. In the meantime she works on getting the next and she is already pretty close to the comic book collection she wants.

“Sweetheart, can you set the table, please? Your Mom will be here soon from grocery shopping and she will need help getting them from the car into the house”, Hotch calls for his daughter while stirring in a pot.

The little girl nods, putting her stationary set and pens aside to do as her father asked. She is in the middle of answering her brother’s last letter, telling him that she is now the one that usually has to read aloud for the class because of her advanced skill for a first grader.

Just as she sets the last piece of silverware down the doorbell rings. “Sweetie, can you please open it? This should be your mother.” Happily (Y/N) runs up and turns the door knob. Over the last few months she hit a small growing spurt and is finally tall enough to reach it without standing on her tippy toes.

“Mo-” She nearly chokes on her own saliva. The one at the door is definitely not her mother. “JACK!” (Y/N) runs up to him and jumps onto his leg. “Hey Princess. I thought now that you read your books, we need to hold the most amazing lightsaber fight in history.” With a mischievous smile he pulls two from his back, giving one to his baby sister.

It is the most epic fight in history between an elementary schooler and a college boy. They can only be stopped by their parents announcing that it is a tie between both of them and that they have to sit down, else the food gets cold.

The following weeks mostly consist of (Y/N)’s joyous laughs and cuddling with her big brother. She even insists on him sleeping with her in her much smaller bed. On his last night before going back to college, the little girl turns to him in the middle of watching her favorite movie in the living room.

“Do you promise not to forget me when you are away? Because I alway think about you and tell my friends so much about you. I told them you are a hero, my hero, just like Daddy. They wanna meet you because of that.” Jack has to hold back tears at her statement.

“I also think of you so much. All of my friends at college are pretty jealous of me having such a sweet baby sister. Maybe one time you can visit me and I can introduce you to them.” The thought of that makes (Y/N) smile and is a little consolation to the thought of her brother leaving again.

Aaron watches the interaction going down, happy to see the strong bond between his children, despite their age gap. This is nothing like he and Sean were and that is a relief for him and the worries he had in the beginning. It is a sign that he did do some things right as a father.

Taglist:

All works:

@dindjarinsspouse @big-galaxy-chaos @jswessie187

Criminal Minds:

@averyhotchner @mggsprettygirl @herecomesthewriterwitch @ash19871962 @ellyhotchner

[martelldoran]

WHAT'S THE CAUSALITY LOOP THEORY

Why Emma, thank you so much for asking. I’m not going to waste time before jumping into this because this is gonna get long so without further ado...

Steve Rogers’ Ending and How Endgame Doesn’t Support a Causality Loop and other such rambles

Last month, I came across a TikTok that proposed that Steve’s ending made sense because it existed within a causality loop. I would link the TikTok but I didn’t save it at the time and trying to find videos on that app is impossible. You think Tumblr’s search function is bad? 🙄 But I digress. The TL;DR of the video is that due to time travel and Steve choosing to go back in time to be Peggy’s husband, it created a causality loop where he was always meant to be her husband because he went back in time and stayed there. The TikToker supported his argument by using Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban (PoA), another film that uses time travel and has a clearly defined example of a causality loop. However, his argument is fundamentally flawed so I’m going to combine my knowledge of my two biggest fandoms to tell you why.

Continued under the cut because I have no chill. Beware, it's long.

To first tell you how Endgame (EG) doesn’t support a causality loop, we must establish how PoA does establish one and does it successfully. The TikToker specifically mentions the scenes that take place at Hagrid’s Hut surrounding Buckbeak the hippogriff’s execution, so we’ll look at those first. What the film does really well is establish early on that there is something weird going on well before anyone actually goes back in time. There are three things that happen in quick succession during this scene which sets up the causality loop we see later in the film. First, a rock flies through the window and breaks a jar. Second, another rock hits Harry in the back of the head. Third, once outside, Hermione hears a branch snap and thinks she sees ‘something’. There are also two additional moments later on in the film once the Harry, Ron, and Hermione have come out of the Shrieking Shack which should also be noted: a wolf howl that distracts Remus Lupin in werewolf form from attacking the group and somebody casting a full-bodied stag patronus at the edge of the lake to save Harry and Sirius from the Dementors.

Of these occurrences, the first is arguably the most important because it does the most to establish that there is something going on outside of the Trio’s current understanding of their situation. The film makes a point to frame the jar breaking as Important Information the Audience Must Remember because it shows a visibly confused Hermione reacting to it as she picks up the rock for closer inspection and we the audience are given close up of it in her hand. Not only is it framed front and centre in the shot but the rock itself is very distinctive. It’s almost wholly smooth but for a swirl of fossil, thus marking it as not just any rock but An Important Rock To Be Remembered. This was an intentional choice by director Alfonso Curon because he uses this rock to connect this moment to its mirrored scene later on once Harry and Hermione use the Time Turner.

The audience and the characters find out about the causality loop at the same time. There are clearly stated rules of time travel that say that they aren’t to meddle with time but when Harry and Hermione see that Dumbledore, the Minister for Magic, and the executioner are on their way to Hagrid’s hut they panic because their counterparts aren’t leaving. Then, we see Hermione notice something in the pumpkin patch: a distinctive rock, smooth with a swirl of fossil. Again, we see have a close up shot with the rock centred to show its importance. Stylistically, it’s very similar to the shot we saw earlier in the film which gives the audience an emotional pay off for noticing the connection. When Hermione throws the rock and breaks the jar, it sets the causality loop in motion. The jar was always going to break because they went back in time to throw the rock that breaks it.

And it’s the same with all the other instances. Hermione throws the second rock that hits Harry in the back of the head to alert him to the fact they need to get out of the hut. Hermione snaps the branch and is almost seen by her counterpart in the past. Hermione makes the wolf call to distract Lupin from attacking. Harry, and not his father as he had assumed, casts the patronus to save himself and Sirius from the Dementors. But each of these moments are set up clearly in the ‘first run through’ to set up their payoff when the characters realise, ‘Oh, I did these things. They were always meant to happen.’ From a narrative standpoint, these are planned out moments to clue the audience into the fact that there’s something bigger at play. It keeps them ‘in the loop’ as it were.

This doesn’t happen in EG.

To successfully have set up a causality loop that made sense and had the same kind of set up and pay off as we see in PoA, it would have had to have been established as early as 2014 in Captain America: The Winter Soldier (CA:TWS). This does not happen. One of the main themes of CA:TWS is moving on from the past. Peggy Carter herself even says, “I’ve lived my life, my only regret is that you didn’t get to live yours.” Then saying soon after, “Sometimes the best thing we can do is to start over.” Peggy’s character in Captain America: The First Avenger is set up as someone who acts as the backup/back bone of Steve’s own moral compass. When Steve falters at Azzano about what to about the captured 107th, Peggy is there to remind him of what is right. She serves a similar narrative function in CA:TWS. Steve is struggling with life in the present. He’s just seen the helecarriers and argued with Nick Fury about protection vs fear after the botched Lumerian Star mission. Morally, he’s in turmoil and has turned to Peggy for council because he’s trying to find purpose in world where his rigid morality seems to have no place.

From the point of view of creating a causality loop, one would think that this scene in the hospital would be the place where an initial set-up could be made and alert the audience to the long term plan for Steve’s character. Instead, we have Peggy mourning the fact that Steve didn’t get to live his life the way it should have played out, and why would a woman who has supposedly been married to another version of Steve tell him to move on? In addition, when Steve visits the Smithsonian, he watches a video where he sees Peggy talking about how he influenced her life and how during one of his missions, he saved the man that would go on to become her husband. This is the only mention of Peggy’s husband in the entire franchise until Steve reappears as an old man at the end of EG.

Captain America: Civil War (CA:CW) also offers an opportunity to set up the causality loop at Peggy’s funeral but again, this does not happen. The only family we are introduced to is Sharon Carter, Peggy’s grand-niece. When it comes to filmmaking, every choice made is intentional. From the hair and makeup to the clothes, to the music used, everything in a film means something whether it is to further character development, world-building, or the plot. Filmmakers have a limited amount of time to convey a story and anything that doesn’t matter isn’t shown. Therefore, we can conclude from the text of the film that Peggy’s husband doesn’t matter to the narrative. The person in Peggy’s family who matters to the narrative is Sharon Carter which is why she is given prominence during CA:CW’s funeral scene. Had the causality loop been set up here, there would have been a defining moment like in PoA where the audience is clued into the larger story arc. Maybe someone says something, or he meets his older self, but that doesn’t happen. It should also be noted that apart from a small scene in Ant Man, Peggy isn’t mentioned again until EG.

In Endgame itself, the film still fails to set up a causality loop. It could be argued that this is the most important film for the set-up because this is when the audience gets the payoff. The first thing we see after the 5-yer time jump is Steve in a group therapy session for those that survived Thanos’ snap. Survivors share their stories and Steve talks about Peggy, a woman who has been dead in canon for 7-years and who died of old age. It’s incongruous and sticks out because narratively it doesn’t make sense for him to talk about her and not someone he watched disintegrate in front of his eyes. Steve watches his best friend and hundreds of others turn to ash around him and that film ends on his horrified face as he sits by his best friend’s ashes. Narratively, this is the thread that should carry through to EG but instead, he talks about missing his chance with Peggy. However, unlike PoA, there is no indication whether through dialogue or framing that clues the audience into Steve’s eventual ending at the end of the film.

Even when he goes back to the 70s, we see him looking mournfully at Peggy through the blinds in her office and a picture of him, pre-serum, on her desk. Steve and Peggy’s relationship prior to Endgame is supposed to represent the bittersweet loss of the life he could have had had he not sacrificed himself to the cause in CA:TFA. Then, since the audience knows from Steve and Peggy’s conversation in the hospital in CA:TWS that she moved on from Steve to live a happy life, we can assume that this picture is meant as nothing more than a fond memento of someone that meant a lot to her. Once more, there is no indication that Steve is ever meant to be her husband.

It’s impossible to infer a causality loop here in the same way as we saw in PoA. In PoA, there is a payoff for every single unusual or weird moment the story presents the audience before and after the use of time travel but this is something that’s completely absent from Endgame’s narrative. Steve himself doesn’t even vocalise a desire to go back in time at any point in EG nor at any point during the other films he appears in. In fact, when questioned by Tony Stark about the possibility of ‘going home’ in Avengers: Age of Ulton, he says, “The guy who wanted all that went in the ice 75 years ago. I think someone else came out.” While it is indicative of his unhappiness in the modern-day, it does indicate a level of acceptance of the fact that this is his life and he has to make his peace with it. He’s taken what Peggy said in CA:TWS on board. He’s starting over and moving on.

With time travel, and Steve choosing to stay in the past came the fan theory that one of the pallbearers carrying Peggy’s casket in CA:CW is Old Man Steve, her husband. When presented with this fan theory, writer Christopher Markus said during an interview with the LA Times at SDCC 2019,

“I would very much like that. There is no set explanation for Cap’s time travel . . .I mean, we’ve had public disagreements with [directors Anthony and Joe Russo] about what it [time travel] necessarily means, but I love the idea of there being two Steve Rogers in the timeline. One who lived a long life with Peggy and is in the background of that funeral scene watching his young self carry his wife’s coffin up. Not just for the time travel mumbo jumbo of it, but for the just weird, personal pain and satisfaction that would be happening between two Steve Rogers there. I kind of love it.” [emphasis mine]

This shows that unlike in PoA there was no intention of creating a causality loop prior to Markus writing EG with his writing partner Stephen McFeely. In fact, it makes clear that the actual rules of time travel were in contention and that even those making the film didn’t have a unified idea of what they wanted to create in the first place. The fact that there is confusion surrounding EG's time travel is due to the fact that the people behind it, didn't seem to know what they were writing or consider the consequences of it.

What all of this shows is that an argument of a PoA style causality loop doesn’t hold water. The film doesn’t support it, nor do any of the previous films, because there aren’t any indicators for the audience to latch onto. There is no moment of the rock breaking the jar, or the patronus chasing away the dementors, no moment where that the audience is told to hold into this information for later because there’s some timey wimey stuff going on. Ultimately, when examined, there is no set-up for a causality loop that supports the theory he was always supposed to go back and be Peggy’s husband, particularly when examined against a film that successfully lays it out from the start.

Right, the more academic (lol) part of this post is done. I just want to address one more TikTok that bothered me because I have opinions and MCU Captain America is my Mastermind specialist subject.

The TL;DR of this one was that Steve’s ending made sense because he got out of the fight and was at peace and that that has been the ultimate goal of his character arc. This person argued that Steve used the Avengers to distract himself from the fact that he’s this man out of time and he can’t find peace without a fight which to some extent, I agree with. I don’t deny that that is a major driving force to his story. We see that in Age of Ultron with his WandaNightmare. I don’t deny that that is key to his character. However, this creator then made a comment at the end of this video to the tune of, ‘bUt BuCkY iS hIs StOrY aRc’ and tried to play it off like this wasn’t true or that people were wrong to think that this is the case.

These two things aren’t mutually exclusive. They’re both true. They’re intertwined. But you cannot say that Bucky Barnes isn’t at the heart of Steve Rogers’ story. Bucky was the catalyst for every single one of Steve’s movies. He becomes CA because of Bucky. He goes against SHIELD because of Bucky. He defies 107 countries and the Sokovia Accords because of Bucky. You take Bucky out of the equation and what do you have? What happens in those films if you take Bucky Barnes out of the equation? Viewing it objectively, and even without shipper goggles on, you simply cannot sit there and claim that Bucky Barnes isn't a defining component to Steve’s story. Steve Rogers is motivated by Bucky Barnes. Steve Rogers is motivated by the depth of their relationship and the fact that Bucky Barnes is one of the few things connecting his new present to his old life.

You can definitely see the fact that Steve is uncomfortable in the modern world. He doesn’t address any of his trauma but he still attempts to move on. However, if they wanted him getting out of the fight and finding life as a civilian to be the natural end to his story arc then there was a way to do it which didn’t require him going back to Peggy. It would have been a better and more satisfying ending if he’d actively chosen to retire because I often see the argument that him going back to Peggy is him finally allowing him to be selfish after shouldering so much over the past decade or more. If Steve chose to retire and put himself first, then that sends a better message. He’s still getting the chance to ‘be selfish’ but he’s not throwing the life he’s built away. At this point in EG, he’s spent a huge portion of his adult life in the modern-day. This isn’t the future for him anymore, it’s the present and he’s lived a life and made real connections with people. The MCU does a piss poor job of showing the interpersonal relationships between the Avengers but he is at least shown to be friends with Sam, Nat, and Bucky.

But he goes back to a delusion. Or an idea of something that was never his in the first place.

When I see people make these videos and share their opinions, I can see their points but it’s like they’re taking EG on its own when that's impossible. Endgame only ‘works’ if you have the context of 10 years’ worth of films. You have to at least be somewhat familiar with the characters, who they are and what they’ve done up until now to be able to make sense of it.

However, in saying that, they wrote and filmed the movie in a way to make you think you didn’t have to take into account anything you’ve seen in the past ten years. If you only watch Endgame, you only see a grieving man mourning the love he never had. You see a man, regretful that he didn’t get to be with woman he loved. So at the end, of course it would make sense that he goes back to her. But you can only do that if you completely divorce Endgame from its ten-year canon and in a franchise like this where they make a big deal about everything being interconnected, it simply doesn’t work. Steve’s story arc in Endgame is incongruous to the narrative arc we’ve been presented in previous films.

Ultimately, Endgame is a movie you’re supposed to watch once and then not think about again. It’s made for that first viewing when everything is shocking and exciting because if you stop to think about it even a little bit, it falls apart under scrutiny.

Finally, I think that the downfall of a lot of these ‘Steve’s ending makes sense’ posts is that made by people who are most certainly MCU fans but not Steve Rogers fans and it shows.

[perpetuelledaydreaming]

L.o.v.e.l.e.s.s. generation

Request: Amazing!! Can i ask for a billy hargrove imagine where he and the reader are together and at a party. They separate for like an hour so he goes with his friends for a while and shes with hers and she gets roofied. Steve and nancy try to help her and then call billy and hes a mess trying to get her to throw up and hes just blabbering and crying and mad af. So much angst and then fluff and yeah. 

@peakascum​ i’m so sorry for taking so looooong. 

words: 7.4 k

Summary: Billy has a bad feeling about a party at Tina’s and you don’t trust your gut feeling because of a kiss, Nancy can kick some ass and both, you and Billy, are the kind of people who cry in the shower. 

Warnings: *trigger warning* We have dark shit here, like pls people if any of your friends get too drunk or you think someone has put something in their drink GO TO THE HOSPITAL. Don’t follow the characters behaviour down below.

billy hargrove masterlist

"There’s a party at Tina’s tonight”, you muttered after disconnecting your lips from Billy’s, who had been more than happy on your make-out session in the parking lot of Hawkins High. 

You fluttered your eyes to watch your hot, hot, boyfriend who was perfectly placed between your legs while he kissed you softly. You weren’t sure how Billy kept his glowing tan all year long, especially in Hawkins but you loved how it combined with his blue electric eyes that pierced you every time he watched you. You removed some of the blonde locks falling on his forehead and placed another kiss on his full lips. 

Sometimes you didn’t know how you managed to snatch him. 

He sighed, “I heard, are you sure you want to go?”, he groaned as he tried to chase your lips once more but you stopped him as you jumped from the hood of the blue Camaro. 

“When does Billy Hargrove rejects a party?”, you asked while raising your brows. You picked up your bag from the floor and began fixing your skirt and sweater, you had to be ready for the debate team meeting while he rolled his eyes. 

You smiled but you turned around as you heard a couple of girls from Billy’s friend group nattering about you from afar as they saw Billy pulling you in once more for another kiss. 

See, how could you even start to recount your relationship with Billy Hargrove? it was hard. Not because it was a difficult relationship, but because you two seemed so different from the outside that sometimes people didn’t even believe that you had lasted so long in the first place. Billy and you had been going strong for over eight months now and it felt like you were on cloud nine. 

He was mesmerized by you since his first day of school, he wasted no time in asking you for a date -to the disapproval of his new gang and the dismay of most of the girls at the school- you were elated by it but you said that he needed to do a lot more if he wanted you to say yes. It wasn’t that you weren’t oblivious to Billy’s charm but you knew his type and he was definitely not on yours. 

Billy didn’t seem more than an aggressive jog and you bore those type of guys, they weren’t stimulating and you had learned to value yourself and your time, more than anything else. So, it took Billy time -with a lot of rejected attempts and multiple pairings on classes- to actually get a yes from you. 

And so, you had come to learn that Billy Hargrove was more than he showed and it hit you to the core because you did the same. They were just different acts, both of you were familiar with the fact that people liked to put tags on others, to label them and keep them in a box, they liked making you one dimensional for them to feel comforted in a stupid status quo. And both of you followed swiftly because sometimes is easier to play a role than to be yourself, it’s easier to make people believe you are one thing. Sometimes it was easier to be just a good girl and sometimes it was easier to be just a bully, but you weren’t that and neither was Billy. 

Billy Hargrove wore his heart on his sleeve and no one had noticed that, you instead kept it locked in a safe to survive and no one had noticed that. 

But Billy noticed your lock and you noticed his sleeve, he understood you and you understood him. 

After hours or even whole nights talking to each other, laughing, even crying you finally agreed to go out with him. 

“I always want to do whatever you want to do”, he whispered to your lips as he pressed quick pecks. You sighed into his lips; eyes closed in bliss as his lips touched yours. “Pick you at nine?”

You smiled as you heard him and your lips now were chasing his. 

…

“See you in an hour or so?”, you asked as you opened the door for Tina’s house, Billy was behind you. Both of you were analyzing the scene in front of you. 

There were a lot of people, far more than what you were expecting but it was the last Friday before Thanksgiving break so you kinda got it. Many of the kids that went away for college were coming back to see their families and since Tina’s parties were always a staple of Hawkins High, you knew most of them wouldn’t miss it. So, there it was: an ocean of sweaty and drunk teenagers and young adults having fun and blasting music.  

You turned around to see a frown on Billy’s face as he saw the scene while you rolled your eyes. You didn’t really know why he was so opposed to partying when he was always down for any type of rave. 

See, although both of you were so similar in many senses, it wasn’t at all the case when you were partying. Billy was the type of guy who liked the attention, he craved it and he found it most of the time in senseless partying. While you, you were the type of girl who liked to be lowkey about your presence at a party, if you had the attention it was from your amazing dancing skills. Otherwise, you liked to spend your parties taking a few shots, dancing, and talking to your friends; nothing more and nothing less. Billy, instead, liked to do his keg stands and playing games, getting a bit more than tipsy. 

Most of the time you were together months of your relationship you both had made sacrifices, sometimes Billy wouldn’t do his normal circus act so he could be in a more calm conversation with you, and sometimes you had decided to cheer him when he was doing his keg stands or accomplishing the dares his stupid friends wanted him to do.

And it was fine, except for the fact that you had exploded one Monday a few months ago when you heard the rumors about the past party, especially the rumor about the “Queen of Hawkins” and how everyone was beginning to think that you were nothing more than a pretty thing that Billy wore around his arm, an accessory. You hated it, you hated it so much that you had ended up ranting about it to Billy who had been patient and listened to every single word without saying much. 

“I’m fucking captain of the debate team, since when I’m an accessory?”, “I’m running for president of the student council, does it look like I care about being Queen of Hawkins?”, “I’m not clingy or sticking to you all the time, it was just one party!”

And so, you had come up with the party plan. It was really simple: As soon as you got to the party, each one would go and do their thing. Billy would go out and play games while you hang out with Steve and Nancy and Johnathan. If there were any good songs or if you were craving each other presences, you would find each other and would dance for a couple of songs or maybe have a little (long) time out inside any room available where you could moan each other’s name. It had worked on the parties that you had gone to for the last few months and it had been fine, most of the time after you found each other you wouldn’t let go.

Today had to be no different, another party at Tina’s, usual business. 

But you knew it wasn’t, Billy turned around to see you with narrowed blue electric eyes, brows bumped together in a scowl and lips pressed together. 

“Billy?”

“I’m not really feeling like partying”, he muttered as he sighed and took a hold of your waist and pulled your flesh against his. 

Sometimes you were more than sure that Billy’s arms were made perfectly for you, you loved being held by him, and feeling like nothing in the world could hurt you. Being held by his biceps and pressed against him always made your heart skip a bit, you didn’t even think twice as you quickly took a hold of his face and you pressed your lips urgently against his, making you whimper into his lips. It was intoxicating the dance between your lips and tongues, you sometimes even got dizzy after kissing Billy but you were more than happy to get drunk on him rather than on vodka. 

But today you wanted to hang out with Nancy, Johnathan, and Steve, you hadn’t been seeing them much since school started again since, well, Billy was a handful. 

“I’ll see you later sir”, you whispered as you gave him the last peck and walked away from him with a smile on your lips. 

Billy stayed stunned after a few seconds and cursed to himself but he knew that you were in the mood for partying and the least he could do was give you space to be by yourself, to have times with your friends. He didn’t want to admit it but he had taken a lot of your time the past few weeks, he had wanted to take advantage of his father leaving Hawkins for a work trip, so he had spent most of his time buried inside of you or sleeping next to you or laughing with you, etc. And he wanted tonight to be no different, but he also respected you and your wishes. So, although he wasn’t too excited, he managed himself. He quickly threatened his way to get a whole bottle of tequila and went outside where Tommy and Carol were waiting for him already. 

“You look stunning!”, Nancy gasped as she saw you, you twirl so they could give a look at your outfit: A tight black leather skirt, military boots, and a cutout band t-shirt from Billy. 

Steve and Jonathan cheered for you as you moved your hips and Nancy clapped, while you then twirl her around for her to model her outfit. 

“You look stunning all the time!”, you replied as you hugged Nancy. 

“That’s indeed true”, Johnathan muttered as he pulled in Nancy for a kiss on her forehead while she wrapped one arm around him, quickly pulling him into a passionate kiss.

Steve rolled his eyes as he got closer to you, “Are we going to dance?”, he whispered in your ear and it made you shiver. 

You couldn’t lie that you had a thing for Steve when you were younger than you were less than thrilled when he started dating Nancy but as time passed, your feelings had changed and Steve became just a great friend in your eyes. Although, it didn’t mean that sometimes Billy didn’t get jealous of him and how close you two were. But he had come to accept it, as he should, and Steve also started to deal with Billy by your request since he didn’t really like him after he had dethroned him as King of Hawkins. 

“Yes, we are”, you replied and quickly pulled Steve into the living room where everyone else was dancing. 

The way you felt the music cruising through your body made you get lost on it, eyes closed and jumping, swaying your hips to the beat, laughing, and smiling all along. Should I stay or Should I go from The Clash was the tenth song you had danced to with Steve and you were sweating from bopping your head to the last bit, throat a little bit sore from screaming the lyrics at the top of your lungs. 

Steve wrapped an arm around your shoulders and pressed a kiss on the top of your head. “I forgot how good it was to dance with you, Y/L/N”, you nodded without much breath but you turned around to see one of the boys from Billy’s group watching you with malice. The narrowed eyes and puckered lips weren’t anything new for you, especially from his “friends” or followers, but you knew how much they would like to initiate any rumor that could create any drama in Hawkins since they didn’t have anything more exciting to do. 

“I’m going to get something to drink”, you muttered as you glared at the loser who had been watching Steve and you, but soon he turned to the patio, where you imagined Billy was. 

You rolled your eyes; you knew you had to do damage control with Billy. Although Billy seemed like he had all the confidence in the world, you knew deep down he was insecure thanks to his relationship with his father, and especially, as months had passed by, he was insecure about your relationship sometimes. It seemed to him that you could do so much better and he was perpetually on edge when he thought about you and Steve too much, although he trusted you completely. 

And on your part, it wasn’t too different, Billy had girls throwing themselves at him permanently which was always annoying, girls who whispered at him that they would make him feel so much better than you ever did and that they wished he could make them scream. Billy had assured you and showed you that he only had eyes with you, and it did become funny sometimes because if there was someone in love with his girlfriend was Billy Hargrove. But still, sometimes that burning feeling that crept its way your heart and spread it through your body, making you feel like you could spitfire didn’t go away.

Especially not at the moment. 

Billy was outside, playing a nice game of beer pong and chugging more beer than you thought he would like tonight, but there he was… with Heather freaking Miller. She was leaning into a flustered Billy as she giggled while he poured the beer on his mouth, a little bit too fast that it made the drink spill all over his naked chest -he always lost some buttons or his shirt at some point in a party-, you imagined that he was a bit tipsy at the moment but you couldn’t help to feel your stomach twisting as you saw Heather pressing a soft kiss to his jaw. 

You spun on your heels faster than you could even imagine, not even wanting to watch Billy’s reaction to her kiss and if you had been a bit drunker, you might have been bold enough to start going off at her and Billy. But you weren’t in the mood, to hell if Billy was told something about Steve, whatever. 

“You said something?”, a guy in the kitchen asked you, as you leaned on the kitchen island in front of the living room that served as the dance floor, realizing that you had been muttering out loud. There weren’t many people in the kitchen, the great majority of the people were dancing or outside, but there were two boys. 

You huffed as you turned around and saw the guy. He had short brown hair and a nice smile as he sipped from his red solo cup. He looked familiar and you remember him being a cheer on after a basketball game while you were a Sophomore at Hawkins High and he was a Senior. He was from an affluent family, you remembered that as well as you might have seen him in one of your parent's Christmas parties, but you weren’t social. 

“Do I know you?”, you asked a bit coldly, annoyed still at the image of Heather and Billy. 

“Burn!”, another boy close to the one that had just talked to you shouted as he laughed at his friend. You recognized him too, he was also known as a Senior when you were in Sophomore, he wasn’t on any team but he was on the popular crowd. 

You vaguely remember the class that had graduated that year, only remembered a few bullying incidents but mostly that they were sexist assholes. You hoped that college had changed them, at least you liked to believe people could mature, but seeing them three years later in a party of their high school didn’t give you much hope.

“I’m Brad”, the boy with short brown hair stated as you sighed and smiled, trying to be as polite as you could taking into account how mad you were. “This is Chad”, he said pointing to his friend. 

“Y/N”, you answer as you shook his hand as he had offered it. 

He held it for a bit too long and you felt goosebumps erupting on your skin, but they weren’t good goosebumps, the way he was looking at you was way too intently but you figured that he was trying to flirt and score a girl. 

“Brad! I just…”, another boy came from the living room with a bottle of tequila in his hand as the three of you turned around to watch him, you took the opportunity and removed your hand from his hold as your eyes began to look for some wine or vodka to take to Steve. “Who’s that?”, the same guy muttered as he got closer to Brad and Chad. 

“Shut up, Logan”, Brad rolled his eyes as he saw you reaching for a bottle of vodka, he quickly took it and then handed it to you with a strange smile. “You have to apologize, my friends, they are…”

“Wonderful?”, Logan said with a smirk.

“Charming?”, Chad answer as he seemed to be taking something from his Varsity Jacket, you didn’t manage to see really what he had since Brad quickly placed solo red cups for you to do shots in, blocking the view.

“Annoying”, he stated as he poured a bit of the vodka on two small cups and then passed the bottle to his friends. You smile at the way he said it, the guy had a charm but there was still a hint of something you didn’t like. Something that didn’t add up to his pretty greyish eyes or his sharp jaw. “Want one round?”

You sighed and nodded. At the moment, you only wanted a drink and don’t think a lot about Billy and Heather, you didn’t want to be too mad about it, especially since it was your idea to do a party plan and you left the road wide open for girls like Heather to flirt with Billy. 

It felt like it was your fault. 

“Sure”

The vodka burned your throat a little bit more than you would imagine but you didn’t care. It tasted okay enough and your eyes simply wondered towards the patio door, in the hopes that Billy might come looking for you but there was no sign of him coming. 

“You have a boyfriend?”, you heard Brad asking and you turned around as you passed a hand through your hair. You watched as Brad’s friends began pouring another round of shots with the vodka but your attention went right to Brad again. 

“I do, he’s with another girl at the patio”, you muttered angrily as you took a hold of the shot and chugged it right in. The vodka still burned on your throat but it now felt bubbly, still burned a bit more than before but you figured it was because you hadn’t been drinking in a while.  

“Ooh”, the two friends shouted and it made you roll your eyes, they weren’t being good company and you tried to snatch the bottle of vodka from the table where they had left it but Brad took it first. 

“Let’s do two more rounds, it will make you feel better”, he cooed as he got closer to you. 

If this was any other moment, at any other party, you would’ve said no and leave without a bottle and look for Billy. But the blonde hair from Heather on Billy’s shoulder, his laugh, and her lips on his jaw were burned on your head at the moment and you wished that maybe vodka could help you, you wished that angry drinking would be enough to make you feel better. 

“Fine”, you answer with a smirk and Brad smiled as well, his friends cheering in the background as you chugged another shot that had been served by you. 

It had to be almost four more rounds of shots of vodka -at least you believed but it didn’t taste like vodka after the second- that they had handed to you when you began to feel weird. 

It began slowly, the sleepiness taking over your body, spreading from your belly towards your chest, and soon it seemed to get on your head. It didn’t feel bad right away, simply weird. You were never a hard drinker, you had never blackout before and you weren’t planning to tonight. Getting tipsy? Yes, getting drunk? Maybe, but this felt like it was happening faster than what you had anticipated. 

You closed your eyes and leaned into the kitchen island for a second, trying to recover your breath to see if that was it, you just needed a little break. But as seconds passed, you felt your muscles getting sleepier and even when your eyes were closed, you felt like you were on a carrousel and it wasn’t stopping. 

“You don’t look so good”, you heard Brad said as he wrapped his arm around your waist, which you tried to get off but it seemed as if your muscles were going in slow motion. “You want to go to the bathroom?”

You felt like you could vomit at his questions, it sounded wrong. You shook your head as you opened your eyes and glared at him, motioning for him to let you go and he did, but as you turned around everything began to be blurry. 

“Iwanttodance”, you slurred, words tumbling against each other. You began walking towards the living room, trying to get away from the kitchen while you desperately tried to look for Nancy, Johnathan, or Steve. 

You felt your head getting dizzier and dizzier as each second passed, your brain seemed to be trying so hard for your limbs to move at the pace that you needed them too but they felt disconnected like there was a short-circuit between them.  

You weren’t sure when they had actually disconnected, it had to be a second before you reached the living room by going down simply two steps. It was something you were sure you could accomplish, not even on your worst drunk stories you had been so unaware of your body, you had never felt like that. So, it wasn’t a surprise when you saw the world turning upside down and you felt a sharp pain on the right side of your body, your head crashing on the floor as you closed your eyes from the impact. 

You fell, badly. 

You whimpered in pain as you felt people’s gaze on you, although you had your eyes closed you could feel people’s presence close to you and you wish you could even stand up but it seemed like nothing worked and you could only motion simple things You heard a couple of people laughing, guessing that maybe you were too drunk and were unable to handle your booze. You felt some girls getting closer to you and asking if you were okay but your words weren’t really words anymore, only mumbles, the pangs of pain still spreading through your torso, hips, and legs while the numbness started to spread as well. 

 It was even getting hard to keep your eyes open for too long. 

Before you knew it, someone was wrapping his arms around your waist and pulling you off the ground. You prayed it was Billy or Steve, with Nancy by their side or even a couple of the girls who had been asking if you were okay. 

“Seems like she’s ready to go to sleep”

You froze as you heard Brad’s voice and a deep feeling of panic started invading your body. You protested, at least you thought but your words didn’t come out from your mouth, your eyes were still close as the pangs of pain from the fall were disappearing quite quickly, which made you worry. 

Brad quickly took a hold of your body and carried you bride-style to god knows where, you suddenly felt your stomach sinking as you realized how weak you were and the fact that you were in the hands of strangers. Sleepiness crawling over your body and anxiety too, everything began to become foggy. 

“We’ll take care good care of you” Logan stated as you felt the music farther and farther away.  

You whimpered in protest as you opened your eyes as you tried to shimmy yourself out of his hold but it just came as spams on your limps, nothing strong enough and it seemed like they were going through the foyer, towards the door. 

“Stop”

Nancy’s voice felt like it had been sent from the sky, you tried to turn your head as quickly as you could and there she was.  “Who are you?”, she asked as she got closer to you. 

You knew Nancy might be little, she might have been a little mousy when you met her but she was fierce and she could end anyone who came on her way. Such a small girl could raise hell if she decided to and you felt like crying with happiness when you -in a blur- watched her crossed her arms across her chest and glare at the guys she was standing in front of.

“She’s feeling bad”, Brad explained with a shrug but the sassy nature of his answer gave him away to Nancy, “She had a lot to drink and she told us to get her home”

“She has a boyfriend for that”, Nancy replied right away angrily. “And friends that know her”

“We are her friends”, he barked back and it made you jump on your inside. 

These guys were aggressive, the way that he answered to Nancy… you felt like tears were pooling in your eyes. This was not okay and panic raised again, flooding your body. You needed Nancy to take you away from their paws, now. You didn’t want to think where this was going if she didn’t manage to stop them. 

“Nancy” you managed to mumble and with all the effort you had, you tried to take a hold of her but your arm gave up before you reached her, soon your eyes rolled to the back of your head and your head fell backward.

You were too weak. 

Nancy froze for a second with fear as she saw your state, and so hell was loose. 

“Get her down now!”, Nancy’s growl made your body tremble, it was so loud that you were hoping that anyone else noticed. 

“Fuck you”, Chad replied as you heard a struggle in front of you… they were holding Nancy now as Brad began to move again, your heart sinking 

“Her boyfriend is being called right now!”, Nancy yelled as you could hear her struggling while you passed in front of her. 

The cold air hit you hard and you cried as you tried to move from Brad’s hold but he wouldn’t budge, they had managed to sneak you and this was the worst-case scenario. Billy was the only thing you thought before your brain began to shut down when you began to drown in the darkness. 

“We shouldn’t have given her so many”, Logan muttered as he opened the door of the car that was parked in the front patio of Tina’s house, close to many others. 

“Can you just shut up?”, Brad growled as he tightened the hold on your body, and tried to see how he could fit you in the car correctly. 

“Maybe it’s better”, Logan muttered as he opened the driver’s door, still talking to himself. “She won’t remember anything”

“WHERE IS SHE?”

The growl coming from the main door from the house shook Brad and Logan to the core. They both turned around to see Billy, exiting the party with Steve and Nancy behind him. 

Billy had been trying to get a Heather Miller off his back since he had started to play a beer-pong match, it had all been easy and messing around until Heather had come in and began to linger closer to Billy each time he drank. She had placed a kiss on his jaw when he had barked at her to back off, people began to laugh around them and scream things, Heather seemed to be annoyed by the statement and tried to talk him out of being so aggressive. Billy remained silent and shrugged her off each time she tried to flirt with him again, it was annoying to him and he knew that his friends would take any chance to start a rumor that could affect your relationship. So, the rest of the time he tried to get as far away from Heather as he possibly could, he even flipped her off before Steve had run towards him and ask him to go with him.  

Billy felt as if a black hole had grown in his stomach as Steve told him what had happened, that some guys were trying to take you somewhere and that you were barely conscious, that Nancy was trying to hold them back but you needed him now. 

Billy wasn’t exactly sure how fast he had arrived, how he didn’t even notice the guy on the floor that Nancy had managed to beat up with a flower vase at the foyer or how he couldn’t hear anything because his heart and breathing were so loud that he could only focus on what he saw. 

And there you were: completely limp, head falling from Brad’s arm, eyes rolled back on the back of your head. You seemed so small; it shook Billy.

Sometimes Billy had these gaps in time when he became so mad that he didn’t feel like himself anymore, he could only feel the anger filling his body as the seconds passed. It was almost automatic when his hands formed into fists and he began to growl. You had talked to him about it and had helped him to never lose control again since you began dating, helping him breathe and control his emotions. 

But not this time. 

Billy yelled as he took Logan first. The guy didn’t even have a second before Billy yanked the keys out of his hands and smashed the boy’s head against the window of the car. Billy didn’t really notice when the window cracked, he only noticed when it broke in front of him as he smashed once again Logan’s head. 

Logan fell on the ground with a groan, blood coming out of the right side of his face, laying with the broken glass on the floor. Billy then turned around quickly to go and get you, Brad had already been cornered by Steve and Nancy while Johnathan tried to rip you off from Brad’s hold. 

“HEY!”, someone yelled as he pushed Billy making him slam against the car door. 

Billy turned around to see Chad, nose already bloody from Nancy’s punch and more coming out of his eyebrow cut thanks to the vase. The guy was already beaten up by Nancy, badly, but Billy didn’t hesitate to beat him to a pulp with his fist. It seemed rather like a gap of time where Billy had no control, as his knuckles slammed against the guy's jaw while he screamed in pain. Chad managed to punch Billy on his ribs but Billy quickly retaliated and knocked him out with a single punch. 

Billy’s breathing was too shaken up, he almost couldn’t even hear how Nancy had been telling him to stop as he kept kicking the guy on the ground. It was only until Nancy hit him in the back of his head, rather hard, that he turned around. 

“We got her”, Nancy yelled at him as she glared at Billy. She didn’t seem too shaken up, her hands were bloody as well and her eyes seemed steady. 

Billy’s eyes traveled to Steve who had you in his arms while Johnathan let Brad fall from his hold against the car, his nose was already bloody, as well as his lips. But at the moment, Billy didn’t care about anything else, he got closer to you so quickly that he felt like he couldn’t breathe anymore. 

“Y/N”, he whispered as tears began to stream from his face. 

You didn’t respond, your eyes with long lashes were closed while your arm was dangling. You were cold, you usually got cold as Billy would work as a heater for you, but right now you were too cold. 

It hurt. 

Billy swore he had heard something breaking inside of his chest, he sucked in a breath as he pressed your cheek with his palm as if in any moment you would open your eyes again, that you would watch him lovingly and place a kiss on his lips like many times before but you didn’t react, you seemed lost. 

It hurt him so much that when he heard a groan coming from the floor, he saw Brad there with barely any real damage on him. Billy felt his muscles tensing up as he walked towards him, ignoring Nancy’s pleas. Billy seemed like a robot as he quickly opened again the door of the car and place Brad’s hand on the edge, without much thought, he shut the door roughly.

“aaaaAAHHH!!”

The painful scream coming from Brad’s lips shocked Nancy and Steve, and even you in your state. The scream had been the only thing that had managed to make you come back from the darkness, you couldn’t really move but your body was screaming for something to happen but your limbs seemed useless. 

Billy quickly kneeled and punch Brad again, making his nose bleed even more. The groans and whimpers coming from Brad didn’t bother Billy, it only bothered him when he wrapped one hand around Brad’s neck and he noticed his knuckles already getting purple. 

He hated being like this. He knew you would disapprove if you had been there watching him but the rage that he was feeling at the moment, he hadn’t felt it in such a long time that if he thought he remained still, he would burst. 

“I see you or your rat friend’s again, and I’ll kill you”, Billy murmured as he let go of Brad’s neck and allowed him to breathe again as he coughed thanks to the pressure Billy had on him.

Billy turned around to see Nancy, Steve, and Johnathan looking terrified, he tried to shake it off and came back to you. 

“They must have roofied her”, Johnathan explained as Billy was desperately trying to wake you up. 

“Y/N, please are you there?”, Billy couldn’t believe it was his voice, so wobbly and small as he moved your hair from your face and took a hold of you had, begging internally for you to wake up. 

You couldn’t believe it was his voice either, you wanted to scream and cry, you wanted to be held by him and feel safe again. But you couldn’t do anything, you could only beg your body to move, nudge, talk, do something. 

And it seemed as if it had listened to you for a moment. 

“Billy”, the whisper was so faint that Billy wasn’t sure it was real, he stopped dead on his track and saw how your glassy eyes were half opened and Billy felt his shaking hands coming over to your hand. 

But then you suddenly gave up, the darkness eating you once again as your eyes rolled to the back of your head once more and you were lying there, emotionless. 

Billy felt his body cold. 

“Y/N?”, Billy asked as tears streamed down once more. “Baby?”, Billy’s voice was so raw and shaken up that it almost scared Nancy as he looked at her and yelled. “Nancy, what should we do?” 

Nancy stayed still for a second, doubting herself but then she walked decidedly towards Steve who was holding your body. “We have to check her breathing and her heartbeat”, Jonathan coming right up helping her to check your vitals, while Billy gave a step back and held your cold hand. 

“She’s still breathing, it’s like she fell asleep”, Nancy answered.

“We have to take her to a hospital”, Steve stated as he held you tighter on his arms. 

Billy panicked and shook his head, knowing exactly that -even though your parents had come to accept your relationship- they wouldn’t waste a second if he gave them a reason to break you guys up. 

“Her parents would know; you know they would never let her see me again”, Billy explained to Steve, his eyes pleading with him not to do it because he knew what the consequences were and he might ruin what made you and Billy happy.  

Steve didn’t like Billy, but he had never seen him like this or anyone for that matter. He had never seen such true desperation; he had never seen someone show such raw emotions for someone. He didn’t like Billy, but you did and Steve knew that Billy was everything you wanted. 

“Fuck, what should we do?”, Johnathan sighed as Billy began taking you from Steve’s arms. 

Billy remained a second as he adjusted you in his arms, his arms around you securely as he watched you carefully. You seemed so pale and fragile, and he hated it because he knew that this wasn’t you. He couldn’t get out of his head how scared you must’ve been before you went out, what they had done to you. He wanted to take you to the hospital, he knew it was the most appropriate way but he also knew that he really couldn’t and at that moment he had a flashback to California when people took more pills than they should. 

“She’s going to have to throw this up”. Billy stated as he tried to wipe the tears with his shoulder as he took you into the house, as quickly as he could. 

“Billy, what are yo-”, Nancy protested as she followed him but Billy was on a mission, 

“She couldn’t have taken them too long ago”, he muttered as he entered Tina’s house.

He was shaking as he muttered to himself deliriously: you are going to be okay; you are going to be okay; you are going to be okay. He pulled you closer to his chest and his eyes urgently tried to find a bathroom, people were gathering around him at the entrance of the party, watching Billy splattered with blood and knuckles purple with you limp on his arms. Billy didn’t care about the people as he tried to see where was it better to take you, he even wondered if the kitchen was right but he knew you wouldn’t want anyone to see you or him in that state. 

Tina ran towards him, as she was about to speak Billy interrupted her.

“Tina!” He screamed, his voice was raw and torn -the urgency in his electric blue eyes seemed almost psychotic-, she shook at his scream. “Bathroom with a shower”

“Oh my god, what happened?”, Tina squealed as she tried to get closer but Billy stepped back. 

“Bathroom”, he growled once more startling Tina. 

“Upstairs in my room! Turn to the left”

Billy said nothing as he ran upstairs, adjusting you in his arms as he followed Tina’s instructions. He let out an all-encompassing sigh of relief as he entered the bathroom. 

“Come on, come on baby”, he whispered as he placed you on the tub and then turned on the shower. The lukewarm water began to wash your legs and lower abdomen as Billy hurried and placed himself behind you. 

He made sure that you were well position, laying on his chest so he could sit you, and then he began to place his fingers on your throat. But nothing was happening, you weren’t reacting as he tried to place his fingers on the right spot for you to throw up whatever they had given to you. 

Tears began to fall from his face, a part of him glad they were being masked with the drops of water. Billy felt like he wanted to puke himself as he gazed at the bottom of the bathtub and realized the blood was being mixed with the water -blood from the guys that he had beaten up and his own coming from his knuckles-. 

He shivered at the thought of how badly he had reacted and what would you think of him, but he quickly snapped out of it as he continued to cry for you. 

“Y/N please”, he cried. “Baby please, come on”.

Billy’s voice seemed so broken and raw, his pleas could be heard by Steve and Jonathan who were outside the bathroom while Nancy was talking to Tina outside her bedroom, convincing her not to enter until you were okay. 

But you weren’t okay, nothing was happening and Billy snapped. 

“pLEASE! Y/N”, it seemed as if his screamed had ripped through his chest as he held you, and once more, he placed his fingers on your throat in one last attempt. 

The gagging was like music to his ears, how your body finally reacted and you raised a bit from his chest with the help of Billy and you began to throw up. You felt like if you were getting out every organ inside of you as your body spammed as you threw up with Billy’s face bury on your neck as he held you. 

It wasn’t until you finally stopped after a minute of throwing up everything you could, that you realized that the fogginess and darkness that had trapped you were leaving, your head was clearing again and Billy felt like he could breathe. It wasn’t like you were completely fine, your breaths were still raggedy but they were stronger than before and you could raise your head for a second, hold yourself. 

You could hold yourself enough to throw up once more, another round, but this time it felt more like a reaction of the fear that you felt from those guys. You didn’t want anything inside of you, nothing from that night, the thought of those guys made you sick. 

It wasn’t until you were unable to throw up anything else, you turn around softly, still feeling woozy. 

And there he was, the only one you had ever wanted. 

Billy’s hair was wet, the streams of water were still falling from his body but you recognize his tears as well. His blue electric eyes that had always been heaven to you, were red from crying and his usually tan skin seemed as white as a paper, completely pale, he looked terrified. 

Indeed, Billy was terrified but he tried not to show it as he caressed your hair and help you lay more comfortably on his chest. It was only when your eyes connected and you took a big breath that you began to cry. The tears were streaming without control from your eyes and it seemed like before, you just wanted to feel empty and clean and safe. Billy held you as close to him as he could while you sob.

He kissed your head, he kissed the back of your neck and your hands as you whimpered and tried to hold anything from him, the craving of him becoming stronger every second. 

“Hold me”, you slurred and Billy nodded, wrapping his arm around your body as you cuddle against him while being wash with the water. 

“I’m so sorry”, Billy whispered as he rocked you back and forth. “I’ll never leave again”

His voice sounded so truthful that you began to think that he meant something for good, so permanently that it made your heart skip a bit but you didn’t want to say anything, you simply nodded and leaned into him even more, burying yourself against his chest. 

“I love you”, he whispered. 

[theoriginalcarnivorousmuffin]

Why do you think muggleborns "exit Hogwarts to find 0 opportunities"? I've read your thoughts on Tom (~ no way he actually wanted to work in customer service, etc) but Lily? Yes, in canon she and James used the Potters money to live off & help the Order, but. Or is it more your headcanon because it makes sense in a pureblood supremacy society? I think it's fitting but I'd like to know if there's smth I missed... (do you think the same happen to hermione after? or is she too famous?..)

Oh, oh ho, no pretty much nothing on this blog comes directly from canon. 

It is, at best, things you can infer about canon if you tilt your head and look at it from all the right angles that JKR intended you to look at it.

So, as far as canon is concerned, this never came up. We know muggleborns are looked down upon by your general pureblood wizard, we know muggles are even more so, but Harry’s world is a very small one and it’s never implied that muggleborns have issues securing employment outside of Hogwarts. 

Dumbledore tells Harry that Tom ends up a clerk because he wanted to, because he likes dark shiny things. This is despite this having at least been Tom’s second choice in career, something that doesn’t really grant him any power over anyone, and, well, something he doesn’t appear to enjoy in the memories shown to us. But Dumbledore has a boy to convince to kill himself for the greater good and explaining, “And then Tom Riddle, the top scoring student in decades, barely managed to secure employment because of his blood status” makes Tom look less evil. No, all the shitty things that happen to Tom are things he intends to happen! What an evil mastermind!

But yes, for Tom specifically, Dumbledore makes it seem as if Tom specifically worked at Borgin and Burkes because he somehow knew about the sale of the locket. I highly doubt this on every level. I think it made for a nice story that Dumbledore could tell Harry and may even believe himself. Dumbledore, after all, is the kind of guy who thought it made him look fantastic to pretend to light an impoverished muggleborn orphan’s wardrobe and all his worldly possessions on fire to teach him a lesson. HE SURE SHOWED HIM! 

The fact that Tom Riddle, who was actively shmoozing Slughorn for years, who supposedly had all these pureblood friends, who had record breaking exam scores, was prefect then head boy, etc. cannot get his foot in the door of the ministry or seemingly anywhere... That’s very very very damning evidence to me.

It also is evidence that makes a lot of sense to me.

The Wizarding World has a hilariously small population. Take Harry’s Hogwarts class size. There are what? About seven kids in each house in his year? Let’s round that up to an even ten. That means at any given time in Hogwarts you have about 280 children. This, even, seems very generous as it seems the important wizarding families don’t have children all that often (once in a generation) and that there might be at most two or three muggleborns in a given year. Hogwarts seems to be Great Britain (as well as Ireland’s) not only premier magical institution but only magical institution. 

This seems comparable given that the other major schools we know of cover multiple populous countries in Europe. Beaux Batons, from what we can tell, seems to be the major school for Western Europe. Ilvermory covers the entire United States. Durmstrang all of Scandinavia and Eastern Europe.

I cannot emphasize how small of a population size the wizarding world must be with these numbers. Forget the size of a small country, forget the size of a large city, the wizarding world is approximately the size of a very very very small town.

This is why everyone knows each other, their major shopping district is essentially a single street, their ‘bad side of town’ is a corner on a street, etc. There are maybe a couple thousand people in the wizarding world. This is nothing.

Now, given that, it becomes clear that there just aren’t that many businesses/ventures for gainful employment around. The Weasley twins make their own business, Charlie actually goes to Romania to become a lumberjack er dragon raiser, Bill goes to work for essentially a foreign nation with the goblins. There’s one newspaper and one tabloid that really feels like a newspaper made out of Luna Lovegood’s garage. There’s a series of quidditch teams that feel like it must consist of half the population. Everyone else, if they have jobs at all and aren’t simply rolling in money and being good old lords, works for the ministry. 

Now, the ministry is huge, overbloated, and a mess. Arthur’s department, for example, should not exist. How is “Misuse of Muggle Artifacts” such an overwhelmingly large problem that it cannot possibly be absorbed by another department? What this means is I suspect the ministry a) is filled with joke departments nobody needs just to provide jobs b) is filled with coveted career positions c) even if you overbloat the ministry there’s only so many jobs. 

Given the world they live in, given the prejudice against muggleborns, do you really think the ministry is going to waste a spot on someone with the last name of Riddle or Evans? Are they really not, instead, going to give that open position to family or friends? The wizarding world feels as if it is made of rank nepotism (Slughorn’s existence even kind of confirms that). Slughorn is so influential because he gets you these networking connections you desperately need. You think Tom enjoys shmoozy cocktail parties with these assholes? You think Lily does? Please, it’s because everyone needs this. The Wizarding World is built on top of who you know.

And, of course, your last name.

Although canon never implies that Lily was anything other than happy to be married to James immediately, have a child, and not work I feel that we’re never given a job for her is very damning evidence. Lily was the most brilliant witch (well probably magic user but I’ll play nice with canon here) of her entire generation, and she either chooses not to get a job or given the above seemingly cannot do so.

I imagine many muggleborns face this bitter reality when they exit Hogwarts. The world is tiny and all jobs go to friends and relatives. Hogwarts was this insular, isolated, dream that made them think they can make it out there.

They can’t.

Even Muggle Studies seems to go to purebloods and the man heading “Misuse of Muggle Artifacts” is a pureblood jackass.

As for Hermione, I think she got very lucky and never realized it. In part because the population is so small, and those who were in power got tied up on Voldemort and thus screwed over because of him, things got very shaken up. More, Hermione by being Harry’s best friend and aiding his quest is a national hero. She gets the leg up she never knew she needed to enter the ministry and earn a very high ranking position very quickly as nearly every occupied position is suddenly vacant from the cleaning house.

Now, Hermione will tell you she earned this herself. That she simply worked harder than everyone else. But she’ll likely never realize that thanks mostly due to her friendship with Harry, as well as being in the right place at the right time, she has the opportunity to do what no one else in her situation could.

But that’s Hermione for you. 

[alicemitch09writes]

(un)loving miya atsumu

fourteen.

loving miya atsumu

Dear Atsumu,

I hate how much your face is the first thing that comes to mind when I think about the word - ‘happiness’ and ‘love’. Happiness, because it radiates off your bones, no matter the situation, in court when up against strong opponents, thwarting plays with a setter dump or when you’re up serving, or when pulling off nasty quicks with your brother or any other player, off court when you fight with Osamu over the last ice cream at the convenience store, when you share a stupid joke with your dad, or even when you’re with the people you care about. Love, because you do everything with just the right to too much amount of love, pouring your everything in it, pouring your heart in the things that make you happy may it be volleyball, Osamu, your family, Mika- not a single wasted opportunity to convey your love and happiness. Nobody compares the way you do.

You’ve set a standard for almost everything, which is why you expect nothing for the best to be at the receiving end of both happiness and love.

I hope you know that to me; you are the embodiment of both happiness and love. Because I really hate how you remain the embodiment of these two words I have difficulty expressing.

Your name literally translates to 'to devour' and in a sense, you are someone who happily, readily accepts love and happiness on a daily basis, allowing it to fill you up to the core and share it with everyone.

You are everything that is everything – the sun after a stormy day, the sunshine in my veins, the kiss of the wind against my skin, the light to my darkness, my sunflower. You are everything to me, and to you, I offer, my whole heart, which you don’t have to worry returning, because it’s yours. Always has been.

     - (Y/N)’s letter, 1 out of 13

"MIKA!" launching yourself at your big sister, engulfing in a hug, the two of you laughed. Breaking away, you held your older sister an arm's length, taking her in. "You're home! You're here!" The excitement was evident in your tone, a bit of confusion as well, at the joyful arrival of your big sister.

"Just thought I'd surprise you!"

Frowning slightly, you ask again. "But how about school?"

"I'm on break!"

"Alexander and Pien?"

"The family's currently on vacation in Spain," sensing another question coming, she furthers. "the parents were the ones who arranged this trip, because they know it would mean the world to me and I would never want to miss my little sister's big day."

The grin on your face softened, engulfing your sister into a hug again. "I'm just so happy you're here,"

"Me, too."

Despite everything that went down, before anything else in the world, this was your sister – your best friend by design. After months apart, talking to her virtually for a year, having her in person was such a delight. Seeing her home was probably the best graduation gift you could ask more.

Swaying into your hug, relishing in the feeling of her touch, Mika slowly opens her eyes, seeing the twins, finally remembering that they weren't alone.

"Oh, no! I'm so sorry!" dropping the hug, she turns to the twins. "Atsumu, Osamu, hello!"

"Welcome back, Mika-nee," says Osamu.

"H-Hey Mika-nee," Atsumu stutters.

Something unsettled in your belly, coming at a screeching halt at the reunion. You could feel Osamu's eyes on you. Balling your hands into fists, you swallowed that ugly feeling, wearing a smile on.

"Shall we head inside?" Nobody seemed to notice the slight crack in your voice, which you were thankful for. Lowering your head, your eyes easily found your graduation pin, a reminder. 

Atsumu, however, seemed out of it. Even in the presence of his first love, he didn't seem the least happy to see her. In fact, he almost looked, dare you say, troubled.

While the three of you were taking off your shoes, the house filled with joyous noises from both families, you turned to the blond-dyed teen worriedly.

"Atsumu, are you alright?"

Is he alright? How was he supposed to feel? Mika was right there! Mika, the person he's been in love with since he was 9. Love, right? She's always been his standard, the perfect girl for some just as perfect as him. Boyfriend be damned. Mika was there. Mika was here. Shouldn't he be happy?

"Atsumu?" At the sound of your voice, he worked on a feeble smile, worrying you even more.

Snapping out of it, he quirks his lips up. Before you can say another word, his grandparents come barrelling down the hall to greet you three.

Atsumu's smile was worrying.

"How I've missed Japanese food!" Mika gushes at the table, eyes bright at the food on display – especially at the seafood, care of your uncle (of course).

Laughing, the twins' father turns to her. "What's wrong with Dutch food, Mika-chan?"

Aside from sushi, there was an assortment of dishes like tempura, sauteed vegetables, salad, grilled meat, roast beef and chicken, and two cakes. With a feast like this, calling for the occasion, it was enough to water anyone’s mouth.                                          

"It's alright, but kinda bland." they laugh at that.

You sat next to your sister, Kaoru on your other side. Across you sat the twins, Atsumu directly in front of you. Catching his eye, he quirked his lips up – smile seeming forced.

Your mom was all smiles, lifting her glass up. “Well now, let’s make a toast to our graduates!”

"To our bright and wonderful children!” your uncle seconds, joyfully, loudly. “To Atsumu, Osamu, and (Y/N)! Cheers!"

"Cheers!" Everyone was clinking their glasses against each other before digging in.

The adults were usually doing the talking, exchanging pleasantries about this and that, while the youngins were on a world of their own. It only made sense why the (extended) table was divided into two – young and old.

Lifting his gaze, Atsumu could see you chatting up with his grandparents, a pleasing and polite smile on your face. As his grandma was sharing about her newest hobby, you were wiping Kaoru’s face clean, much to the younger boy’s displeasure.

“Atsumu, I hear you’ve been scouted by a pro-league?”

Suddenly called by Mika, he was suddenly on the spot. Normally, he would preen, just to keep those bright (e/c) eyes on him. When in truth, he wants another pair of eyes on him.

“Oh, uh…yeah, that’s right.”

“Pfft, what kinda energy is that?” booms his dad’s voice, ringing throughout the room. “Give it more life, Atsumu!” Beside him, his mom pats her husband’s arm, smiling per usual, but had a loving look in her eyes.

“What team are you joining?”

“MSBY Black Jackals,” he replies, staring at his plate. “they’re based in Osaka.”

Atsumu still remembers the day you approached him, shared with him how a scout agent had approached you first, then asked for Atsumu’s contact information. He was so over the moon after you told him that.

“Oh! So it’s close by!”

“Yeah.”

“That’s nice, you don’t have to worry about university and just continue doing what you do best. I’m jealous.”

Atsumu works on a faint smile, happy to hear it.

You watched the whole exchange from the corner of your eye, taking a bite of sushi before washing it down with soda, swallowing down the lump in your throat as well.

“Nee-san,” something pat at the corners of your mouth, Kaoru grinning. “your mouth was messy!”

Smiling, you could only pat his head in gratitude. “Thank you, Kaoru.”

“And how about (Y/N)-chan?” the Miya’s grandmother asked you suddenly, bringing the attention to you.

Now at the center of attention, you set down your plate. “Um…I’ll be studying at Hiroshima University.”

“Hiroshima! That’s four hours away from here?” whines the twins’ mom, to which your uncle and mom shrugs easily.

“Well, it was her decision.”

“Waseda was also in her list, but she opted for Hiroshima University.”

Nearly choking on his drink, the twins’ father turns to you. “Wa-Waseda!?”

“Dad, calm down!” Atsumu berates, embarrassed. Beside him, Osamu just helps himself to another serving, handing his grandfather another, too.

“Don’t underestimate Waseda, Atsumu! That’s one of the most prestigious schools in Japan!”

Atsumu knows that very well, because you told them about it. Just that…

“Well, she didn’t pass.” Huffs your uncle, but goes on to explain rather excitedly. “So she went for the next big thing – Hiroshima University!”

“Dad, didn’t we already tell you this?” Osamu frowns, rice sticking to his cheek. “We also told you she passed the exams.”

Their dad deflated at that, scratching at his cheek. “A-Ah, eh…you know your old man, he’s getting old and his memory’s failing him.” Everyone in the table laughs, even young Kaoru!

“Still, Hiroshima’s a long way from here, (Y/N)-chan,” their grandfather turns to you. “Why not join Osamu at Kobe University? Or Atsumu in Osaka at Kansai University?”

Shrugging, you reached over to refill his glass. “I wanted a change of pace, I guess. Also,” sitting back, you brushed strands of hair behind your ear, exposing your conch piercing. “I had a bit of epiphany when we had our class excursion there.”

The adults smile at your words, Mika, most especially.

“Well, I know you’ll do well there which is why we want you to have this,” from his pocket, the twins’ grandfather produced three envelopes – for you, Osamu, and Atsumu. To say that the three of you were shocked would be an understatement. “Here,”

Ever so carefully, the three of you took the envelope with both hands.

“Go on, open it!” says their mom excitedly, recording with their phone.

“OH MY GOD MOM, YOU’RE EMBARRASSING US!”

“Open, open!” their grandmother clapped her hands excitedly, sharing the same sweet smile as her husband.

Glancing at each other, the three of you seemed to share the same idea.

“On three?”

Nod.

“One,”

“Two,”

“Three!”

Outside the window, the wind blew, sending a draft it in (L/N) household. One glance and you were greeted by a world painted in pink hues, blushes of nature come in falling petals – spring has come alright.

In your subdivision, there was only one cherry blossom tree that was planted in the playground just behind your house. At the epicentre of your neighbourhood, like a heartbeat that connected each household to its beating. When spring comes, it blooms, shedding off its petals, scattering against the wind everywhere – for everyone to see.

A chance to bring spring into their homes, to enjoy moments like these without having to worry about leaving. Like a hanami at home.

“Ohhh.”

“…we got money.”

“Granny, Gramps, thank you so much!”

“Use the money wisely now!”

“I’m jealous,” Mika tells you, watching the twins. “you three got to share moments like these, have been for years. But now,” her smile falters a bit. “you’re off on your separate ways. Will you be okay?”

Your big sister will always be your best friend, one deigned to you since you were born and because of blood. But having friends of your own was another story, especially worth noting just how quiet you can be, which is why when they moved to Hyogo and were introduced to the twins, it made her feel settled. The three of you were inseparable, always together, a bond she envied.

At this point in your life, there was no denying the consequences of growing up.

“We all have our own different dreams and ambitions, so it’s only normal that we chase after it.” Taking a sip of your drink, your eyes catch on Osamu. “Osamu’s not as ambitious as his brother, but he’s just as competitive – especially when it comes to his future and happiness.”

“True, but a shame that he’s not going pro like his brother, they would be such a team!”

It would, years of watching them grow together was enough of a testament. The most powerful twins in volleyball.

“They’ll always have volleyball and each other. But when it comes to happiness, that’s another story.” Recalling Osamu’s soft gaze on the finished onigiri he made, the tale he shared afterwards. “Osamu’s happiness in with cooking and food.”

Humming, Mika takes her own drink, sipping in.

“And the thing with Atsumu is that’s he’s always looking forward, never once settling on the past knowing that it will hold him back. In fact, he’s always looking ahead that he tends to forget what he’s doing in present time.”

“It sounds like he’s taken to heart your club motto, huh? ‘We don’t need memories’.”

It was such a powerful motto – moving and inspiring all at once. From the moment your eyes saw Inarizaki’s banner when you were young to the moment you became manager, that motto has stuck with you the most. You love that motto, love its implication and even took it by heart.

“We can’t always be ruled by our past after all.” You set your drink down. “How else are we going to move forward?”

Atsumu stared at the ceiling before him, having given up tossing and turning for the past few hours. After the third hour, he threw in the towel – he was restless, unable to fall asleep from everything that’s happened today. It’s as though he found himself at an impasse – unsure of what he’s been holding on to, unable to comprehend how he should feel with everything going on.

Mika was home. Feelings he’s had for her…surfaced. He thinks. Atsumu broke into a sigh, sitting up, he was a mess.

Suddenly, he heard rummaging from below him, muted light glowing from below.

“’Samu?” he called out.

“Ah, shit.” Osamu craned his head, meeting his eyes. “Sorry, ‘Tsumu. Did I wake you?”

Shaking his head, Atsumu noted that Osamu was dressed up. “Where’re you headed?”

“Out.” He pockets his phone and wallet away.

“By yourself?” When his brother shakes his head, Atsumu shifts from his spot, asking again. “With whom?”

“…with (Y/N).”

Atsumu was silent for a while, coming to realization how Osamu sneaks out a lot in the past. It shouldn’t be a question and should be easy to tell who he usually hung out with late at night.

“Can I come?”

Osamu’s blinked at that. Atsumu waits, hopes. He watches as his brother looks at his phone, then back to his brother. Eventually, he exhales through his nose, wearing a half-smile as he nods slowly.

“Yeah, come on.”

Smiling, Atsumu feels excited as he gets down from his bunk and quickly changes. Following his brother's lead, ever so quietly the twins trudge out of the house, careful not to make any loud noises (which honestly, they shouldn't even bother for everyone in their family were heavy sleepers), door closing shut behind him. It amazed Atsumu how his brother does it all with practiced eased.

Spring evening was chilly, biting at his skin, nipping his nose. Good thing he thought of putting on his hoodie.

Together, the twins head out their house, bypassing their gate and turn, towards the (L/N) house next door where a figure waited.

Dressed in an oversized hoodie that stopped by your mid thighs, gazing up at the night sky in thought, in waiting.

"Yo, (Y/N)."

Lowering your head, (e/c) eyes widened slightly once realizing your best friend didn't come alone. At this, Atsumu raised a hand in greeting.

"Hey, (Y/N). Mind if I tag along?"

You shrug easily, standing to your full height. "Sure, why not."

Spring night was cool and crisp, biting almost – remnants from winter’s past.

Three teens walk along their quiet neighbourhood, cruising along houses for some few blocks until reaching a brightly lit establishment just next to the main road.

Upon entering the store, the cashier – a smiling, tired-looking woman, nods at Osamu and you, eyes shining in familiarity. A recurrence, it seems. Despite the wee hours of the night, the stillness of the silence, bright lights flooded the establishment with a multitude of goods lined up, budget meals prepped and ready, everything seemed liked a sight for any customer.

Following after Osamu, the two cruised through the aisles, his brother grabbing some chips and a seasonal onigiri, the twins nearly towering over. Reaching the end, he felt a chill, realizing he was by the frozen section, with you eyeing the selection with pursed lips.

"Aren't you full from all the food we ate earlier?" Atsumu laughs, standing next to you.

"Lest you forget, Osamu has a black hole for a stomach. I'm on my period, so I have cravings." Saying this, you stare at the selection of ice cream.

"How about curfew?" You were such a stickler for rules, this was so new to him.

Shrugging, you picked up strawberry and chocolate brownie. "Osamu and I sometimes pass off as adults. Plus, this neighborhood tends to be complacent when it comes to curfew."

He smirks. "So you're using that to your advantage, huh? Smart girl."

Your only reply was bumping your shoulder against his, putting the strawberry ice cream in his hands. Which he decidedly takes.

Over your meals, the three of you share laugh, meals, and talks. Unable to help himself, and taking a page from his mother, Atsumu takes a selfie to commemorate the moment, uploading instantly to his social media.

To any other bystander – or whoever sees Atsumu’s selfie, it was nothing more than a teenage hang out with your childhood friend and brother. Rather picturesque of perfect innocence, measured smiles, occasional banter highlighted only by the lights of the sleepy convenience store, saturated by the spring evening.

A moment that sent a lurch down each of your hearts at the knowledge that moments like these were numbered. Caught up in the moment, Atsumu desperately wished for time to freeze, wishing his life was always like this.

Nostalgia filled the night, between childhood friends – like that year of silence meant nothing. It was enough to choke Atsumu, bring him to tears with how much he's missed this. Memories from his past painted into his present with bright hues and ink, he wanted them to stay, etched on his skin - unready to have them washed away when the morning comings.

Late-night snacks ended up with the twins sneaking their game console to the (L/N)'s household, talks continue even as you three were playing video games until the wee hours of the morrow, filled with more talks that piled conversation over conversation, talking as though they had a clue – leaving you all breaking into fits of silly laughter.

Just as you landed second in Mario Kart, Osamu conked out first.

"I swear, he sleeps like a fucking log," Atsumu says, watching you carefully set Osamu's head on your lap, patting his head gently.

Smiling softly, you carefully take the blanket you snuck and tucked him in, and yourself, too. Atsumu stood to turn off the console and the TV, filling the room in darkness. However, the glow from the moon outside was enough to illuminate the living room.

"You'll be heading off to Hiroshima, right?" he whispers, reaffirming the question thrown to you earlier that day, you nod. "Wow,” sitting next to you, on the edge of the sofa, he settles in. “big step."

"I figured that I'd like to open my horizon, have a new pace."

Atsumu remembered the peaceful look on your face when they had their class excursion there, smiling at the memory and a bit on the history of the city.

"Like a fresh new beginning, huh?"

Nodding, eyes beginning to droop, Atsumu carefully brings your head to his chest, falling back. "Like you...you'll be off to Osaka...for MSBY Black Jack'ls" you slur. "Osamu's staying here..."

Humming, he brushes away hair from your face, listening to your voice against Osamu's snores.

"You seem t'be doin' fine," he almost laughs at how thick your Kansai was when you were on the brink of sleep. "'ve always been." Taking an inhale, through your exhale you say, "you don't need me, Atsumu, you never have." and then you slipped off to sleep.

How he envied the friendship you had with Osamu, the one thing that connected you both in the first place. Taking your left hand in his, fingers slotting together, scarred fingers touching against each other, he noses at your forehead, lips a hairsbreadth away from your skin.

“Oh, you have no idea just how wrong you are, (Y/N).” lips pressed the lightest kiss, the moon and the stars as his witness. “I’ll always need you.”

You must've heard him in your sleep, because you were smiling, adorably. It was the last sight he saw before Atsumu slipped off, as well. 

Dawn broke out slowly, as it always did in Hyogo, light streaming, searching almost for signs of life in the living room. With the sun slowly making its way up, light follows upwards, eventually finding three bodies knocked out in the living room - sleeping rather awkwardly with two boys sandwiching a girl, peaceful, lost in silence. Somewhat, it was a familiar sight.

Waking up to the smell of breakfast, Atsumu woke with a start, blinking wearily as he took in his surroundings. Right, he snuck out with Osamu and stayed over at the (L/N)’s.

Lifting his head, a ghost of a smile found its way on his face when a mop of (h/c) came to view, your hand still in his. Strands of hair littered your face, which he quickly swept away, causing you to stir.

"Good morning, sleepyheads!" a cheery voice greeted from the kitchen. "Hope you like pancakes!"

Fresh out of bed, with her hair in a messy bun with an apron on was Mika, she looked pretty, adorable even. Atsumu should've been happy by the sight of this, captivated even. But he felt nothing.

At the mention of pancakes, Osamu sleepily lifts his head, in alert, eyes still pinched close. Slowly, you rose from Atsumu’s chest, having used it as a pillow last night, rubbing at your eyes.

“Mornin’ (Y/N),” he laughs.

Blinking your eyes open, with the sight of Atsumu in front of you, between his legs, realizing your sleeping position from last night, instantly your face heated, darkened. “A-Atsumu! A-Ah…Um…G-Good morning…” folding his legs back, he did a stretch, Osamu slowly coming to beside you. “Did you sleep well? Does your neck hurt? Your back?”

Your concern was honestly adorable – like your morning self, it made his heart warm.

“No worries, I slept great!”

True to his word, the rest of the morning went swimmingly over heaps of pancake and another selfie.

“I fear you’ll be taking after your mother in that aspect.”

“Wow, selfie whore.”

“SHUT IT, ‘SAMU!”

After breakfast, the twins had to head back home, to greet their grandparents while you started packing. When lunch came, the twins were back – freshly changed and all. At the sight of them, your mom couldn’t help gushing that ‘it takes me back!’ to which your uncle laughed at heartily, welcoming the boys in before they both left for work.

“Oi, Kaoru what’re you doing?” Osamu asked, watching how as your brother stood on a dining chair he grabbed, pushed it against the wall as he reached up, tying something by the window.

Squinting, you asked. “Is…that a teru teru bozu?”

“Yep!” he smiled, letting the doll face outside, getting another balled-up doll from his pocket. “Nee-san’s birthday’s in a few days, don’t want it to rain then!”

“Kaoru, aren’t you a little too old for superstitions?”

“I’m only 13!”

“Yes, but there’s no scientific proof that they prevent rain from coming. Plus, it’s spring, it’s not so hot of a season for rain to fall.”

Miffed by your explanation, he turned, nearly toppling over had he not righted himself quickly. “You don’t know that, nee-san!” Kaoru hopped off the chair, pouting at you.

“Yeah, what the brother boy said!” Atsumu seconded.

“Better safe than sorry!”

You could only sip on your drink in reply, hiding the smile. Osamu gave you a funny look, amused.

“Plus, it has to be sunny on nee-san’s birthday! We’re going to-“ before Kaoru could finish, Mika appeared, slapping a hand on his mouth.

“Hey, how about I make us pasta for lunch?”

Instantly, Kaoru’s face brightened. “Yay, pasta!”

“By the way, (Y/N),” she calls to you. “Reiki’s coming over with the pizza you like that his friend makes, the spinach one and garlic shrimp?”

At the mention of the aforementioned pizzas, your lips quickly quirk up. It was so hard to find those specific flavors around Kobe, the last time you had them was probably before Mika left. Thankfully, Reiki, being the social butterfly that he was, knew a lot of people.

“Your boyfriend has my many thanks,”

Mika laughs, making you realize a little too late on the words that left your mouth. Sliding your eyes to Atsumu, you were surprised to find that he seemed relatively fine, cordial even.

When Reiki came with the pizzas later, pasta ready and waiting, you all feasted, but not before Atsumu insisted on a selfie with everyone.

“I swear, you’re turning to Ma and it’s scaring me,” Osamu tells his brother with a disgusted frown.

“Watch your mouth, ‘Samu that’s still our Ma!” Atsumu angrily bites off his pizza. “Is it so wrong to capture moments frozen in time!?”

“Wow, that was a rather poetic way of saying it,” you noted, nodding your thanks at Reiki would gave you two slices each of the pizzas.

“Come on now, let’s not fight!” Reiki says calmly, undeterred by the twins. “Let’s just eat, yeah?”

A long-distance relationship seemed to work fine for your sister and Reiki. Clearly, distance makes the heart fonder with how lovey-dovey they seemed. A peek over at Atsumu, and you’d half-expect him to go batshit crazy. But no. If anything, he seemed perfectly fine.

“Atsumu, do you have a minute?”

As Atsumu walked off with your sister, you could only watch, lips quirking into a smile. For some reason, you felt fine with that, too.

It was probably when they first moved to Hyogo that Atsumu’s eyes fell to Mika, the ever-smiling, ever-kind oldest daughter. There were plenty of reasons to like her: she was pleasant, polite, pretty, smart, athletic, and kind. For years, Atsumu has always set her as his standard for his ideal woman, even assured himself that he was at her level (which shouldn’t be so hard, thanks to his genetics).

For the first time in the forever, he thought of finally confessing to her his feelings, that chance that he’s waiting for so long.

And yet, as the two enter the backyard, the door sliding shut behind him, Atsumu turns to Mika, with a question that’s been burning on to the back of his head for a while now.

"Why did you do it?"

"Huh?" Mika looks up in surprise, letting go of the door handle.

"Why'd you to talk to him?" Atsumu felt his patience running thin, anger building.

Mika's perfect face falls into confusion, exposing the cracks underneath. This was clearly not what she intended to talk about, but Atsumu didn’t care, he was leading this conversation now. Honestly, it feels like he’s finally seeing her for who she really is – for the first time, the rosy lenses he had of her were torn away.

Him, being their dad.

Pressing her lips together, a fist to her mouth, contemplating on her response. "...I just...I wanted..."

"A connection?" he finishes for her, an educated guess.

Mika nodded. "He's still my dad, you know? I just thought...I could get to know him..."

"And that hurt (Y/N) in the process," Atsumu threw out, rather impatiently, almost accusingly. "did you know that?"

Pain crosses over her face, bleeding through from her eyes down to the upturn of her lips, hands fisting on her chest.

"Maybe you wanted a relationship with him,” shaking his head, he thinks of you “but not (Y/N)." Of all his memories with you, one where he's caught your eyes on their dad, feeling his stomach twist at the longing in your eyes, hurt him the most. You may have had your uncle, but having your own father was a different thing. You told him that Mika was studying psychology, he couldn’t help but think how ironic that was.

"I'm not perfect, Atsumu."

Atsumu scoffed. "Don't I know that?"

He was an older sibling himself. Older by five minutes, he was still regarded as the oldest, has as much responsibility despite that minute difference.

"Older siblings aren't perfect," Mika says. "We make mistakes, we hurt people, even our siblings." She very clearly wanted to discuss something else, something that clearly wasn’t this. But now that Atsumu’s taken control, she felt herself lose rights.

"Did you tell him about our graduation?"

Mika fell silent, mouth pulled into a line.

That was enough of an answer.

Atsumu tried to imagine how the young you must have felt, the horrors you had to face, to witness, how your young, impressionable mind just paused and came to a screeching halt, to a horrible realization of how fucked up everything was now - he could only feel immeasurable pain, choking him. When that happened, did it also take away the life and spark in your eyes? The joy of life?

He loved his dad very much, his dad was one of the best men in his life who always encouraged him and Osamu to pursue their dreams, always at the frontline for them, and loved his whole family. Had he done what your dad did, he would also feel just as crushed. What he did was inexcusable – to you, to Mika, to your brother, to your mom. Scums like him didn't deserve a second chance.

"I can't believe you did that."

Without waiting for her to reply, Atsumu walked back inside the house, back to where his brother and you were.

Late at night, you stare up at the ceiling, hugging ‘Inari’ – the fox plushie given to you by the trouble children – close to your chest. Mind filled with thoughts, just swimming over you.

Earlier, Atsumu had walked back in the house, the same worrying smile from a few days ago, eyes losing its usual luster. Yet, he assured you that it was nothing, ruffling your hair affectionately.

Mika then walked back in the house, all smiles – but even she had a weary looking smile. Before you could approach her, Reiki rushed to her side and the two scurried to the kitchen. Thankfully, Kaoru, hadn’t picked up on this, busy trying to beat his two nii-sans in Smash.

Shifting your head to the side, to where Mika’s bed was, your sister was dead to the world, deep in her slumber – peaceful and calm. Lifting yourself from your bed, covers dropping, ever so carefully you dropped your feet to the cold floor. Still hugging Inari, you walked away from your bed and to one of the boxes, staring at the contents – some books, stationary.

Bending down, you dig through, careful not to make a sound. From the box, you pulled out a wooden picture frame, hand painted blue, with sunflowers sticking on the top left, a few petals on the upper and lower. And in frame was the photo of the Inarizaki Volleyball Club. It was taken the moment everyone returned from Tokyo. Smiling fondly, fingers smoothed over the sunflowers, taking in everyone’s smiles.

At the center of the photo was you, sandwiched between Atsumu and Osamu, wearing wide grins. When your juniors handed you the frame, you were so sure you’d break out then and there. But it didn’t end there, because Coach Kurosu – tears spilling down his face, gave you his gift, too. Gently setting Inari down, frame sitting next to him, you plucked a small, thick, black cloth.

Sitting crossed legged, you opened it up, smiling at the familiar kanji of the club’s motto.

‘We Don’t Need Memories’

“Such a powerful statement,” you whisper into the silence.

Kita once shared that he wasn’t a fan of the motto – being a man brought by the small things, on how doing the minimum on a daily basis is already enough of an assurance for any needless worries. Yet, it fires him up when he’s up with his team mates.

Coach Kurosu also mentioned, overly fond of the motto, that nothing should ever hold you back from the challenges that life will hurl at you.

Smoothing over the smooth kanji characters, a wave of memories rushed over you – first stepping into the gym, applying as manager the same time the twins had their try-outs, introducing yourself as manager before the twins engulfed you into a hug, seeing Aran again, meeting Kita and the rest of your seniors, meeting Suna, Ginjima, and the rest of the team, being there when the twins got their jerseys, their first official match, making your way to nationals, the twins debuting their dyed hairs, the incident, Kita’s captaincy, him berating you for resigning and convincing you to stay, the painful and cold second year, walking out during preliminaries, breaking down in the club room, having to tell Atsumu he was chosen for the Youth Camp, meeting Sho-chan at nationals, resigning only to be brought back, arcades with the trouble children, sunflowers given by the juniors on your birthday, training in Asano and Yoshimichi, training the new recruits, warmer days in the club, nationals with with Sho-chan, smacking Atsumu in the face, the retirement and turning over, graduation – so many great memories, good and bad. They were definitely the time of your life, if not, the greatest. A chapter that’s come to a close, but filled with so many turning points.

Patting the banner affectionately, a single tear slips down your face, landing on the banner, what a deep tangent you’ve found yourself in.

March 23, your birthday.

It fell on a Sunday, on a perfect sun shiny day, just as your family had expected.

On your birthday, it was decided that it would be spent at Sunflower Hill Park at Ono. Seeing as it was a special day, everyone had to dress their best – you included, being the birthday girl. Mika immediately busied herself prettying you up, even getting you to finally wear the dress that Kita had gifted you sometime back. It’s been gathering dust in the closet since he gave it, unsure on when to wear it.

“It’s just my birthday,” you grumbled, Mika immediately shushing you busily brushing your hair aside to work on your eyes, her face pinched into concentration.

“It’s not ‘just your birthday’, (Y/N).” she says, lighting brushing over your eyes. Setting down her eyeshadow palette, she picks up a blush set, instructing you to smile, exposing your dimples.

“19,” you say aloud, announcing to the world freely. “I’m at the peak of my adulthood.”

“You know, you’ve always been an adult all your life.” Mika teases, brush circling your dimples. “But that doesn’t mean you should be down on your birthday.”

“Studies show that it’s only natural to have birthday disappointments the older you get.” You rebuke, watching her frown cutely, setting her blush down, brandishing a mascara in her hand.

“And studies also show that you don’t always have to have that kind of mindset,” she rebukes back, twirling her mascara madly before taking out the wand. “Open your eyes and look up.”

Gulping, you do as she says, feeling the wand passing down your lashes.

“Birthday disappointments can also be stemmed from high expectations – either from childhood or from adolescence. And here’s the hard truth: you actually want to celebrate your birthday, but you just don’t know how to tell people.”

Capping her mascara, she instructs you to close your eyes, which you do, before you’re assaulted with a mist-like spray all over your face. When she tells you to open, you find yourself staring at yourself in the mirror – struck at the person staring back at you. Mika did a great job, highlighting your features, brightening your whole face, it was easy to see now the resemblance between you two.

“We’re not mind readers, (Y/N), we’re your family. And because we love you, we want to celebrate the day you came to bless our lives,” Mika smiles, smoothing your hair.

Helping you put on your dress, even lending you her sandals, she added some finishing touches like earrings and a sun brim hat.

“I look like those stereotypical animes shown in the summer.” You comment about your reflection in the mirror, to which Mika rolls her eyes at.

“Would you stop, you look beautiful!”

Taking her words with a grain of salt – seeing how pretty she was in her own dress, you smiled and the two of you walk out the room.

“Are you two done, now- Ah, how pretty!” coos your mother, pressing her hands to her mouth, eyes watering.

“Mom, you’re being dramatic-“

“My girls are so pretty! Especially the birthday girl!”

Beside you, Mika looks pleased with herself, especially at her work.

“Happy birthday, sweetie,” says your mom, taking your face in her hands, pressing a kiss on your forehead.

Swallowing down hard, fighting off tears that have strangely formed, you smile at her. “Thanks mom.”

“Alright, let’s go down now! Everyone’s waiting for us!”

Anxiety rose up, heart in your chest as you three descended the stairs, where you could hear people chatting about in the living room. Everyone was there – your uncle, Kaoru, Reiki, the Miyas, even the twins. It was Atsumu who saw you first, doing a double take, taking you in.

And then his mom squealed at the sight of you. “Ah!!!!! (Y/N)-chan, you look so pretty!” everyone turns to you, much to your horror. “Happy birthday, sweet girl!” she says.

“…thank you, Auntie.” Your voice was quiet, raspy.

Being the center of attention, everyone’s smiles on you was unnerving.

Self-consciously, you duck under their gazes, face burning.

To your surprise, your family had long planned this together with the Miyas. What made it extra special was the fact that it was just days after the three of you graduated and of Mika’s return. An outing of two families, in a field of little suns spread across the field.

At the sight of tall, bright yellow and brown flowers, your eyes sparkled in child-like wonder. Sensing your excitement, Mika, with her uncle’s camera slung around her neck, hooked her arm around yours, giggling and pulling you further in the park, leaving Atsumu and the rest to follow after.

The adults were discussing amongst themselves, discussing where they should set up, Reiki happily stuck around them, ever ready to help around, while Kaoru was running off to join his sisters. Alone with his brother, Osamu elbows him.

"Is something wrong with you and Mika-nee?" Osamu asks him, feeling the breeze against his skin.

On the way to Ono, with the twins, you, Mika, and Reiki, in Reiki’s car, there was a noticeable avoidance between Atsumu and Mika. However, the two easily played it off. Mika was busy chatting up with her boyfriend, Atsumu looked over your shoulder, as you answered birthday greetings.

Even way before that, the two of them were masterful in their way of seeming fine, but when they interacted, it felt rather stiff.

Sighing, Atsumu’s eyes found Kaoru, who was giggling as Mika was getting you to pose in front of flowers, you, clearly embarrassed, tried to talk your way out of it.

"I confronted her about their dad," Atsumu grumbles, hands in his pocket. Eventually, you caved in your sister’s whims, posing demurely, before Kaoru cheered you to try other poses.

Osamu's eyes widened. "Are you an idiot!? Why would you-"

"Did you know that she also told him about our graduation?"

Osamu stopped at that, at its implication, their eyes going to the older (L/N) sister, showing the photos to you.

"Damn."

"I know. Pretty shitty of her."

"Wow, 'Tsumu badmouthing Mika-nee, that's new."

Scoffing, he lifted his head to meet his brother’s. "What the fuck does that mean?"

Shrugging easily, Osamu explains, as their parents walk southward into the park, where an open area for picnic was. "Almost a year ago, you were nothing but praises for her, wouldn’t shut up about her on and on and on.” Breathing out a laugh, he shakes his head when he adds. “Heck, even if she farted you'd think it was cute."

Atsumu's face wrinkles, cringes. "That was before."

“Still,” walking ahead, he stares his brother down, feeling a chill run down his spine. “you never let us forget. Never let (Y/N) forget that.”

Up ahead, the (L/N) siblings were soon joined by Reiki, who took the camera from Mika, opting to take photos of the siblings. (Y/N), who was sandwiched between her older and younger sibling, all smiles for the camera.

“A year ago, it was as though your mission was to make (Y/N) feel so shitty about yourself, all because of your stupid little crush. It took her finally deciding to leave for you to snap out of it.”

Swallowing thickly, Atsumu vaguely remembered that moment of panic, like something had clawed into his chest. Immediately, he feels a sense of shame – for everything he had done to you.

"'Tsumu, you realize that you never said you're sorry to (Y/N), right?"

The hardest pill to swallow was realizing that despite the year he’s had, devoted to making up to you, it just wasn’t enough. Actions may speak louder than words, but just saying those words were just as important. Especially because it was worth noting that, sometimes, Atsumu’s actions can be contradicting to his words and may confuse you. You, who’s suffered quietly all this time, who forced themselves to power through, who unselfishly put others before yourself.

“I’m way past that now,” determination was thick in his tone, strong in his words.

Osamu felt proud to see it, loved to see it. They were nearing their parents – who finally found a nice picnic spot, just right next to the playground hustle.

"Didn't you say that Mika-nee was your one true love?" he couldn’t help but say, egging on his brother, never letting him down on his fuck up.

Osamu nearly fell back as Atsumu tackled him, slapping a hand to his mouth, lest anyone heard it. "KEEP YOUR MOUTH SHUT, SHITTY 'SAMU!"

"Wasn't she though!?"

"I was a kid!" he reasoned out. "I didn't know shit!"

"Clearly still don't now!" Osamu yelled slapping his brother's hand away from his face.

"FUCK YOU!"

"Now, now, Atsumu, Osamu, no fighting on (Y/N)'s special day!" calls their dad, hands on his hips. Beside him was their mom, smiling as she took photos of the sunflowers all around them.

"Oh, oh, oh, sweetie, let's take a photo with the birthday girl!" hooking her arm around her husband's she didn't give him time to back out before dragging him with her, smiling sweetly at her sons. "And no fighting, Atsumu, Osamu, it's a special day!"

Speaking of special day, Atsumu’s eyes turned to the fields, where you were – feeling his heart settle at your familiar frame, your gentle expression as you gazed at the vibrant yellow sunflowers. He remembered that field trip when they were younger, remembered where your eyes were staring, dug through the display when no one was looking and snuck it in his bag, feeling giddy all over, remembered the smile that came to your face.

It was brighter than any of the sunflowers.

Under the clear blue skies, the sun was shining bright, smiling down on everyone – especially a particular group down at Ono Sunflower Hill Park, circling a girl dressed in white, balloons in hands, all wearing smiles as they sang to greet her.

Their singing echoed out in the field, the wind carrying on their love for the girl in the middle, the girl whose heart was just filled with love with everyone around her.

A simple white cake, decorated in the same flowers that surrounded them was presented to her, and a single candle stood alit, waiting.

When the singing dwindled down, the girl stared at her cake, closed her eyes, and then blew.

She was now 19.

What a lovely day to be loved, feel loved, and be celebrated by love.

Emboldened by his talk with Osamu, brought also by epiphany, Atsumu finds himself carefully approaching Mika.

“Mika-nee, can we talk?”

Reiki, having sensed the mood, excused himself, but not before kissing his girlfriend on the forehead and taking Kaoru with him away from the playground.

Squirming under his gaze, remembering his blow-up on her days before, she fixes him a pleading look. "Atsumu, look, I don't want to fight with you-"

"I'm not sorry for blowing up on you like that, Mika-nee.” He starts, meaning every word. “But I am sorry for intruding into your family business. I just care for (Y/N), she's..." he swallows thickly. "she's been through so much."

Mika’s expression softens, eyes shining. "You really care a great deal about (Y/N), huh?"

“Always have, always will.”

“I’m glad.”

Mika smiles sweetly at him, fiddling with her hands. “It’s just…he’s still my dad, what he did was unforgivable, but the idea of reconnecting with him,” she sniffles, wiping a tear. “how could I not? And then I thought, that maybe (Y/N) would be on board with the idea…” she shakes her head, laughing incredulously. “Clearly, I forgot that I can’t force it on her, can’t fix the trauma he did.” Her face pinches, pained and regret.

The old Atsumu would have rushed and comforted her, assured her that she did great. Emphasis on the old, the Atsumu now just stared, letting her wallow on her mistake.

Covering her face, she groaned into it, before fixing herself up, slapping her cheeks together. “Wooh! How embarrassing of me! Looks like I’ve got a long way to go!” she laughs. Atsumu can’t help but laugh with her.

Even now, her ability to smile through the pain, shoulder her burdens, amazes him. There was a reason he admired this young woman before him, but seeing her open up to her flaws made him admire her even more.

And then he felt it, the urge, something clawing at his chest, words that needed to be said.

“Mika-nee, actually,” the older girl looks up at him, waits patiently. “I…I like you.” Back when he was younger, he had envisioned the perfect confession – something almost like this, with the sun setting behind them, painting them in the afterglow. That was one of his two options for confessing, the other being in the letter he poured his heart in, with your help. “I liked you, Mika-nee.”

It feels freeing to finally say that, to let the person know how much they meant to them. Even if it were no longer the case.

She smiles, sweetly again. “I know.”

Atsumu looks up at her, surprised. Mika’s smile remains.

“E-Eh?”

“I received your letter,” his eyes widen, confusion crawling over. “(Y/N) snuck it into my things before I left for the Netherlands.”

You did that for him? You.

Looking back, his eyes could only widen, realizing that it had been during the incident. Atsumu is assaulted with guilt all over again, brought by your unselfishness, just unsure with what he could say.

“I always thought that it would be the two of you, you know? You three were thick as thieves, enough to rival the three musketeers. But you and (Y/N)? I always felt like there was a great bond between you two.”

“N-Nee-san…actually…I-“ Everything he did to you in the year following the incident came to mind, his self-hate rising, Mika deserved to know.

Instead, she gently shakes her head. “It’s not me you should be telling that to, Atsumu. It’s (Y/N).” taking his arm in her hand, she cups his chin, (e/c) eyes meeting his honey browns, smiling and squeezing on to him arm encouragingly. “Go.”

Coming to, he nods and quickly starts running. Before fully leaving the playground, Mika calls him. “Oh, and Atsumu? Thank you so much for your feelings!”

“Osamu,”

“Hm?”

“Remember when you told me about your first love?”

“…yeah.” He sighs, heavily. “The umeboshi to my onigiri.”

“That’s a funny analogy,” with your arm over his, you leaned against his shoulder as the two of you walked along the pat. “but very fitting for someone you love.”

“Yeah, yeah, laugh it off. What’s yours?”

“Isn’t it obvious?” you look to the field.

“Ah, yes.” Osamu nods, following your gaze. “Sunflowers.”

Leaning against his arm, you murmur. “…he’s my sunflower, Osamu.”

Osamu doesn’t say anything for a while, watching how Kaoru and Reiki raced beside them. Two people missing from their group. “I know he is.”

“And you’re my chicken noodle soup.”

He snorts, looking down at you. “Why?”

“It’s my comfort food, remember? Also, you’re my best friend. You should feel honored.”

“Strange analogy you got there.” He waves at his grandparents, enjoying themselves watch the children play in the fountains.

“Not as strange as your umeboshi and onigiri,” you remind him, teasingly.

Rolling his eyes at that, he can’t deny the gentleness of your voice, its weight and wistfulness.

“Thanks for being my best friend, Osamu.”

Patting his hand over yours, he replies. “Always.”

Breaking away, you smile gratefully at him. He lets you walk off from him, taking a new path.

“Stop sounding like you’re about to die, (Y/N). S’not funny.”

Laughing, you could only tuck your hands behind you. “I’m just feeling nostalgic!”

“Where’re you going?”

“For a walk!”

“Geez, aren’t you tired of walking?”

“Nope,” and you walk further in the new path, Osamu watches you go, but doesn’t follow.

With all his heart, he wishes, for your birthday, all the best for you. Keeping his eyes on white, it slowly shrinks as you walk further and further, away and away, until you were out of sight.

Huffing and puffing, he looked around wildly, searching for (h/c) in a white dress. Atsumu almost cursed at how big of an area the park was, felt pathetic that he was winded out after some runs – he was a fucking athlete, god damn it! About to join a pro-fucking-league-

"Are you looking for someone?" a voice asked him, turning, Atsumu nearly sagged in relief when he found who he was looking for.

You.

"You," he says breathlessly, lips stretched into a wide smile.

Your face scrunched into a light frown, wondering, before producing a handkerchief in your hands, patting his sweaty face. “Have you been running around the park?”

“Nah, just now.” Your frown softens a bit. “Like I said, I was looking for you.”

Tilting your head to the side, confused, you asked. “Why?”

Atsumu opened his mouth, only to stop, realization getting the best of him. Shiiiiiiit.

Suddenly shy, he laughed it off, nervously, uncaring that people were looking at him funny. Concerned washed over your features, which warmed him from the inside, especially with you looking at him all pretty like that. But heck, even without the makeup, you were something else.

“Come on,” you opened a hand to him, an invitation.

Atsumu stared at it, at the scar on your middle finger. Placing his in yours, his larger hand over yours, the two of you began to walk hand-in-hand. You took him by the fields, deep in, as though to hide you amongst the flowers, to be one with them, to a secret place for you both.

For all his life, he couldn’t imagine having to miss out on the feeling, like everything he’s known his whole life is nothing compared to the bright, vibrant yellows and browns around him, in the girl dressed in white, leading him through. And he let you.

How is it that he’s never noticed? Why had he never thought of seeing you? It feels as though he’s led a life blind.

With a tug, the two of you exit the field and into a clearing, all Atsumu can focus on was your smile.

“I’ve always wanted to do that,” you laugh, walking a few steps to the path. “walking across a sunflower field, I mean.”

Atsumu can’t keep his eyes off your smile, even as the both of you sit on the grass, facing the famed 'Sunflower Tower' made of Mikage granite.

The two of you found yourselves in your little hideaway, with nothing but the sky, the sun, the flowers, and the tower, and of course, each other.

“Sounds like something fresh outta a fairy tale,”

Nodding, you fold your legs, drawing your knees near. “Sunflowers are quite tall, after all. Tall and tough flowers.”

“Like me?”

Laughing, your turn to him, staring at him for a while. “Maybe. Especially with your blond dye.”

At the mention of his hair, he runs a hand through it. “…I’m, uh, thinking of keeping it.”

“You should,” your eyes follow his hands carding through his hair, dark roots slowly showing through. “it’ll be your signature look.”

Running a hand through the back of his hair, he fists them there, unable to look away from you.

You.

Amazing, smart, patient, kind, selfless, beautiful you.

“(Y/N)…” your name came easy through his mouth.

Tilting your head, letting strands of hair slip off your shoulders, you parrot back, “Atsumu…”

Just when did everything seem to feel different between you two? And just how long had he missed the way you look bathed in the sunlight?

Fidgeting a little, Atsumu could feel his strength leave him, being at the receiving end of your gaze. However, looking up, he also draws strength from them.

“I, uh, I kept them,” at your frowned confusion, he shyly – oh so quietly, adds, “your letters.”

Immediately, your face burns, feeling goosebumps run all over your spine. “Ugh,” slapping your hands over your eyes, you wish you could also slap the cringe away. “why.”

Atsumu smiles, despite your apparent horror, shrugging easily.

“It’s a reminder, I guess. A reminder that someone actually liked me. Genuinely and truly. Thought of me. Appreciated me. Written and practically poured her heart out in paper, when it’s the fucking twenty first century. Living proof that someone did that for me, but I was the asshole who humiliated her for something so genuine and heartfelt.”

You would’ve argued then and there, having seen the many love letters he and his brother received from his fan club over the years. And yet, the only one he recognizes are yours.

“Atsumu,” words were failing you, so you just sighed. “that’s behind us now.”

But the look on his face wouldn’t go away, eyes darkening – a dangerous storm brewing, festering.

"You can't return my feelings,” you say kindly. “that's not your fault neither is it your problem."

"Y-Yeah, but I could at least try to-"

"Atsumu, stop. Just, stop.” Turning to him, you take his hand in yours – the one with a scar, fingers rubbing comfortingly. “Please.” You’ve thought about it for a while, a long while, it needed to be said. “I'm not going to force you to like me back, it's not right and it's just wrong. Just because I liked you doesn't mean you're obligated to return my feelings when you clearly don't like me like that. That's that."

"B-But-"

"Besides, I've already accepted it – that my feelings can't reach you." swallowing down it all - the heartache and pain, you lifted your gaze and offered a smile. "If all you're worried about is me forgiving you, rest assured that I have."

"But I don't deserve your forgiveness!" he all but screams, shocking you, his eyes were wet and filled with so much remorse, pain, helplessness, and regret. "I've been an ass to you, (Y/N)! I hurt you while you were already hurting," he remembered having to listen to your cries, muffled behind your hands, the forced smiles, the pained look in your eyes, your back turned to him, his panic of not being able to find you during practice. The realization of the distance between both of you because of him. "I walked around you even though you were breaking from the inside. I might as well be worse than your deadbeat, asshole of a father because I wasn't there for you. I hurt you just as he did! I failed you! I-I-"

A gentle hand touched his elbow, shaking him, he looks up, meeting your kind (e/c) gaze. And that smile, that same kind smile that stretched to your eyes, reflecting an oh so loving gaze he knew he didn't deserve. Even without saying a word, you understood everything he wanted to say, all the sorries that's been resting on his tongue, heavy with the weight of his sins, of the burdens of hurting you, of the love he's had and continue to have for you.

He didn't deserve you.

You didn't deserve him.

But you both loved each other just as much.

"(Y-Y/N)," his voice was barely a whisper, wet and croaking. "I'm so sorry...!"

Enveloping you into a hug, he cries into your shoulder, repeatedly saying “I’m sorry” over and over again.

And you just hold him, caressing his head with your other hand.

“I’ll always love you, Atsumu,” your confession just tore at him, tears leaking more. “you will always be my first love, and that will never change.”

Atsumu hugs you tighter, cries harder. “I love you, too.”

When you let go, there was a smile on your face – a radiant, bright, reflected in your eyes that it brightened up your whole face. Like a sunflower greeting the sun, Atsumu found himself smiling, too. Released from the embrace, in his eyes, he feels his heart fill with a bittersweet sense of warmth and twinge.

Despite it all, it still felt good. It felt really good. Talking to you, settling things with you, loving you – it felt right.

Certain people come into our lives whether we like it or not, and you were no exception.

Sadly, just because you came into their life doesn’t automatically guarantee that they’ll stay with you forever. You can only have them for a time.

One of them may end up as your first love, but it's not guaranteed that they will be your last. They'll be just that - your first love, the first person you offered your heart to, but not the person who gets to keep it.

You were his forever person, the first love he realized too late.

end.

[g12xxx]

Finish watching Pasion De Gavilanes 2

I have a lot to say

Juan and Norma- I prefer s1 Juan than this one and I didn’t like his attitude. What the hell was he think by kissing Rosario.His jealous of Norma and Albin had me 🙄. He see his son with Rosario and instead of telling her to leave he goes and kiss her because he wanted her to have a taste of her own medicine, revenge 🤦🏽‍♀️ Norma should of just left him for good.

Juan David and Muriel- I like them as a couple but their storyline didn’t really do much for me. I don’t find Juan David that interesting as a character. I don’t who in the writers room thought that it was a good story to tell between JD and Rosario because it wasn’t 😑

Erick and Leon- These twins are assholes. It was so obvious that they didn’t kill the teacher. The story of who killed the teacher was lacklustre and the reveal of the killer dragged on for too long. I was really into Erick and Sibila story and felt they could of done more, they meet and then all of the sudden we don’t see Sibila anymore until later on (until episode 70 I think) it had potential to be good storyline but even though it was short I still like them together. Leon he needed his own story because he had nothing going on with him outside of the teacher murder story.

Oscar and Jimena - They are one of my favourite couples in PDG but the character assassination of Oscar Reyes is just horrible. Again who thought Oscar cheating on Jimena was a good idea because it was a bad move. They could of just had Oscar and Jimena go through adoption. Oscar should of been honest with Jimena from the beginning. Jimena was getting stalked and drugged by Romina Oscar crazy ex mistress and instead of being honest with her he was gaslighting her.Jimena always wanted children so I wasn’t surprised when she started bonding with Duvan . Oscar is lucky that Jimena is a good woman and she deserved better.

Rosario - Her obsession with Juan David was waste of time. I did like seeing her relationship with Muriel but it was ruined because she is obsessed with JD

Sara and Franco - They are one of my favourite couple in PDG. When It was announced that Michel brown was going to join PDG2 after he first wasn’t I was excited. This storyline frustrated me, why didn’t they just write that Franco went on a mission and him and Sara are not divorced. I didn’t like that they made Sara think Franco left her to be with another woman. I also didn’t like that Juan and Oscar knew where he was and kept quite for 3 years, come on man.

Gaby is being stalk by Demetrio , her and Sara tell Gabriella about her friend instead of believing her granddaughter she insults her and think best way is to try and hit her granddaughter. She also says that Gaby is sick in the head.Gabriella hasn’t learned anything when she picks toxic jerks over her own family and we have been here before. I was happy when Sara stood up to her mother and believed her daughter. However that changed quickly and after she started to believe Demetrio they ruined Sara character for me. There were clear 🚩 for Sara to see how dangerous this guy is. The fact that she had that man be in her house where her daughter lives , who is feeling unsafe and traumatised by him frustrated me. And to tell your daughter that she was obsessed with Demetrio was horrible to watch.

Demetrio making homophobic comments towards Andres and Albin and instead of standing up to him regarding his homophobic comments towards her own son and boyfriend , she just excused and says that they are provoking Demetrio. She chose that predator, creepy man over her own son who she told to leave the house. I did not like that Gabriella was try to set Sara with Demetrio ugh. Forcing the Andres and Gaby to get along with this man was annoying to watch Sara had put Gaby in danger. Favourite part was when Albin and Franco punched Demetrio because he deserves it. I’m glad Gaby had her aunt Jimena, Andres and Albin.

I did like Gaby and Nino story and Andres and Albin story. I liked Albin because he didn’t take any bullshit from that predator especially with the homophobic comments, I wished he had punched him at dinner. Also glad to see Franco saved Gaby after she was nearly attacked and that he had a go at Sara afterwards, it what she deserved. I did like the reunion Franco had with Gaby and Andres. As much as I didn’t like Sara this season I did like her reunion with Franco as well. I had no sympathy for Gabriella at all.

[whumpmatsus]

So. Todomatsu always ACTS like he hates that Karamatsu is so eccentric, but we all know he actually doesn't mind that much. If anyone else made fun of him for that stuff, I can't help but think he wouldn't let it fly. So what about a situation where Karamatsu gets made fun of/bullied/put down by someone OUTSIDE the family for being the way he be and Todomatsu gets an opportunity to go into full protective mode over him??

OH SHIT the youngest of them goes feral

dare I say... RELEASE THE BABY!!!!!

God I love Zaimoku, it’s so good <3

-

If Totty is being completely, utterly, unfailingly honest with himself, his brothers need his help if one of them is going to be going on a date.

Really, he’s the only one who has any clue about how to act on a date! He could hit his big brothers over the head with a Clue-by-four with that shit and they still wouldn’t really get it.

Even so… part of him thinks he shouldn’t really be following Karamatsu to a date. Karamatsu is the one Totty knows is never going to come running to him for advice or assistance, especially with girls; he’s got the undeserved ego of an avocado toast sandwich. Totty isn’t sure he’d be pleased to know his baby brother tagged along not because he has to sort out a schedule thing at work, but because he wants to keep an eye on Karamatsu.

What else is he supposed to do, though? Just let Karamatsu go alone and totally blow it? His usual behavior aside, Totty really wants his big brothers to be happy and have fulfilling relationships. He thinks if he can be there to keep an eye on things, well, maybe it won’t go so bad. Maybe Karamatsu will have a shot with this woman. Maybe he’ll get a girlfriend!

The very idea was enough to make him feel a little better about lying so that his brother will take him along. It eases his conscience, imagining that if he manages to help Karamatsu out to the point that the second eldest ends up in a loving, joyful relationship, (obviously as opposed to the past few horrible ones he’s had), then a little fib isn’t so bad, is it?

After all, if he were the one in need of something like this, he’d be grateful for his brothers’ help however they did it.

Of course, when he sees the look this girl gives Karamatsu, a look like the kind a baby gives after licking a lemon for the first time, Totty can’t help but wince. This isn’t off to a great start. He lingers by the counter, greeting Sacchi and Aida, trying not to look as if he’s watching his big brother’s date.

“Aren’t you off today, Totty?” Sacchi hums as she turns to start making a drink.

He nods. “Yeah, well, I can’t stay away, I guess, haha.”

Aida jerks her head toward the table where Karamatsu and his date are. “That’s one of your brothers, right? Still as painful as ever,” she teases. “Is he… oh, my God, he’s on a date??”

“Shhhh, shh!” Totty waves his hands a little, hoping to get his friends to quiet down a little. The last thing Karamatsu needs is to be drawing attention. “He thinks I tagged along to talk to you guys about my schedule. But, yes, he’s here on a date.”

Sacchi finishes serving her customer, one of the few in the shop at the moment, and then leans against the counter to look over. “Aw, good for him. He’s not either of our types, but he deserves a shot with someone who’s interested.”

He lets out a soft sigh. “Agreed there. I kind of just wanna keep an eye on him, you know? To make sure he doesn’t mess it up too much. He should have let me pick his outfit, ugh… that aside, he’s doing okay so far, though, I think.”

Aida frowns as she slides a cup of coffee toward her coworker. “Um, I hate to burst your bubble, but he’s got his work cut out for him. I’ve been to some mixers with that girl, and she always finds something wrong with every guy she hangs out with.”

“She’s right,” Sacchi adds. “Good thing you came along so you can carry him home, ‘cause that girl’s gonna tear him to pieces. I mean, she went out with Atsushi and the next day he was in here crying and telling me she made him feel two inches tall. Nobody’s good enough for her.”

Aida clicks her tongue. “Your big brother’s in big trouble, Totty.”

It’s Totty’s turn to frown as he looks toward Karamatsu. Unfortunately, Sutabaa is so small and he’s close enough that he doesn’t have to strain too much to hear what’s being said.

The woman is laughing. However… Karamatsu hasn’t even really opened his mouth yet. “Oh, my God! You’re my date, huh? Last time I let my sister set me up. That bitch, haha. Ah, well… wow, your jacket is hurting my eyes. Could you take it off?”

Karamatsu seems to be trying his best to smile. “O-oh, yes, of course.” He moves to tug it off, folding it over the back of his chair. “Please forgive me. Anyway, my name is Karamatsu. And you, my angel?”

“Ahaha, WHAT?” The woman raises an eyebrow at him. “C’mon, dude. Don’t call me that. I’m nobody’s angel.”

Totty feels himself starting to steam. You’ve got that right.

“A-ah… right, my apologies.” Karamatsu just keeps smiling. The expression on his face reads almost like he’s in pain. “Well, should we order?”

She gives a cursory glance toward the menu, then suddenly her eyes are drawn to Karamatsu again. “Oh, my God, hold on… is… is that your face on your shirt?! Holy shit! Are you really that full of yourself?”

Totty’s heart sinks as his brother’s cheeks flush bright red. This is not going well. And while, yes, Karamatsu probably should have picked a different shirt, what’s really wrong with what he’s wearing? Even though he’s a little over-the-top and dramatic, this woman can’t know whether or not he’s ‘full of himself’ when she’s barely letting him get a word in.

Totty is the most socially intelligent of his brothers, and even he doesn’t think Karamatsu’s actually doing anything wrong. He hasn’t drawn anyone else’s attention like he usually does, he hasn’t gone overboard with any poses, and he’s… kind of just being himself, slightly toned down. It’s not like he’s bragging or being a jerk. Hell, it’s just a strange fashion choice; how the hell does she think it has any bearing on what he’s like as a person?

“Damn,” Sacchi cringes. “She’s not wasting any time, is she?”

Aida gives a pout toward her friends. “He didn’t even do anything wrong yet. He’s been a perfect gentleman.”

“Yeah, he’s just a little odd and, like, a tiny bit painful. But he’s acting really nice and polite.” Sacchi sighs as she props her head up on her hand. “There’s no pleasing some people. Aida, why don’t you go take their order? Maybe you can accidentally spill it on that pretentious top of hers when you bring it to them.”

“Pfff, if only. I’m on it, though.”

Totty continues to fume as he watches his poor brother try to impress this girl, pretty much in vain. He gets the feeling that nothing Karamatsu says or does is going to be good enough. For some reason, that really pisses him off. Despite the fact that Karamatsu can be a bit much, that he’s overcompensating for being insecure on the inside, that everyone rolls their eyes at him… Karamatsu isn’t a bad guy. He tries hard to make other people happy and treats them with respect. Even his brothers who don’t always return the favor.

By the point Sacchi and Aida are finished making their order, the youngest is ready to explode at this woman. She never even told Karamatsu her name, but she’s spent the whole time talking him down. When she asked what he did ‘besides be super excruciating’, and he told her he didn’t really have a job, she laughed at him. He tried to save it by saying he occasionally played guitar at coffee shops, and she responded something along the lines of, “What kind of hipster loser does that these days??”

Listening to it just makes him so angry. She doesn’t think Karamatsu is attractive, she’s called him embarrassing more than once, and no matter what he does or says, she’s not happy with it. Why the fuck did she even bother going out with him, then?

Totty was worried that Karamatsu was going to screw this up; so far he’s actually managed to be a decent date. He wasn’t prepared for his brother’s date to be the shitty one.

Sacchi brings him a simple iced coffee while Aida returns with the serving tray, a fake smile on her face from laughing uncomfortably at one of the woman’s comments. “God, she’s exhausting.”

“I don’t even know her and I can’t stand her,” Totty mutterrs before taking a sip of his drink. “Why the hell is she treating him like that? He’s just… being himself!”

Being himself. Karamatsu’s really not doing anything wrong. He’s trying to talk himself up when this woman gives him a chance to, but who doesn’t talk themself up on a first date? He just wants to impress her.

It makes Totty feel a little guilty to realize that, honestly, all Karamatsu really wants is to impress everyone because he wants people to like him… including his brothers. If Karamatsu feels the need to seek love and acceptance from strangers like this girl, to the point that he’s willing to put up with the horrible way she’s treating him, what does that say about his brothers? It’s not the first time he’s sucked it up and dealt with something he shouldn’t have from someone just because he wants that person to love him.

His attention is drawn by the woman giggling a little too loudly. “Fuck, you wanna go out with me again? I mean, how do you think this is going? I’m two seconds away from sneaking out the bathroom window. You’re so obnoxious, you dress like an edgy middle schooler, and who wears sunglasses inside, especially when it’s raining outside? You’re, like, cringe incarnate.”

Completely contradicting every statement she made, she slid her hand across the table to take his, if only for a brief moment. The wicked look in her eyes, more sadistic than even Ichimatsu, made Totty’s stomach twist in anger. “I might keep you around, though. You seem like a guy who’d keep me laughing for a while. Maybe next time I’ll take you out with my friends so everyone can laugh at you.”

Oh, that’s it.

He doesn’t know if Karamatsu is oblivious to what she means because he’s blinded and deafened by the promise of another date, or if he knows exactly what she means but perhaps thinks it’s worth it. His eyes light up… and behind that hopeful spark is the pain she’s already put him through.

Baby of the bunch though he is, Totty isn’t going to sit around and twiddle his thumbs while some bitch takes advantage of his big brother.

“Oh, that is sooooo not happening!” he calls as he approaches the table. Although he feels a little bad about just stepping in like this, he’s not gonna let her get away with treating Karamatsu like that. Laughing at him herself was bad enough; parading him in front of her friends for all of them to laugh at him when there’s nothing wrong with Karamatsu isn’t gonna happen if Totty has something to say about it.

The woman gives him an unimpressed look. “Who the fuck are you?”

“T-Totty!!” Karamatsu,  on the other hand, looks immediately panicked. “I can handle this… please, go back and fix your schedule, and I’ll meet you at home.”

“Wait, you work here?” She tilts her head at him. “Oh, shit, hold up. You’re the asshole who messed up my drink last time I was here.” Her gaze flits between the two of them, and she laughs again.

“― Oh, my God! You had to bring your twin brother along to come on a date? You’re pathetic!” Her hand pulls away from Karamatsu’s. “Oh, you’re definitely coming out with me and my friends.”

Totty hisses and pushes her hand away from Karamatsu’s. He steps in front of his big brother to physically block this woman from him. “Keep your hands off him! You’re not taking him anywhere. He’s never seeing you again, because you treated him like… like, fuck, I wouldn’t treat a rock the way you treated him!”

He hears Karamatsu make a noise of almost-protest behind him; he can just imagine the other man sinking down in his seat and trying to hide his face. “Totty, please…”

“No! No, she doesn’t get to just treat you like dirt, Karamatsu-nii-san! You think my brother’s just some kind of dumbass you can show off to your friends and laugh at and treat him like crap?!” he snarls. “Well, guess what? He may be sort of a dumbass sometimes, and maybe he’s a little painful, and maybe he’s not the perfect guy you’re looking for! But he’s a whole hell of a better person than you are!”

Although Totty could kick himself for not saying anything to Karamatsu before, it might be best it’s coming out now. He doesn’t have a lot of time to really think about it or pretend or rehearse. What he’s saying isn’t practiced, it’s real. “Karamatsu is the kindest person I know, and you wish you had at least half the passion he does for the things he likes! Who cares that he wears a shirt with his own face on it? He was bending over backwards to make you happy, even though everything out of your mouth was word barf about how embarrassing he is! And, by the way, you’re wrong!”

It only takes half a step for him to reach over to grab his coffee from the counter, assisted by Aida who’s smirking as she holds it out for him. “If my choice was between you or him, I’d be way less embarrassed to be seen in public with him than with you! He’s not perfect, but he cares about people, and he’s always there when you need him, and ― and all this stuff you think is embarrassing, who the hell gives a shit?! It’s what he wants to do and it’s not hurting anyone! I’d break my phone before I let my big brother go out with someone like you again! Maybe he keeps striking out with dates, but he’s never going to be that desperate!”

He feels a little bad about what he’s about to do. That feeling is mitigated by the fact that at least his coffee isn’t hot.

“And, you know, I actually am sorry about messing up your drink last time. So here, you can have mine!” Almost before he’s finished speaking, he’s dumped his entire cup over her head.

He doesn’t stick around to deal with the aftermath aside from seeing the look of abject horror on the woman’s face as the coffee makes her bad mascara drip. And even though there’s a little bit of guilt over the fact that he’s leaving his coworkers to deal with her, the fact that Sacchi and Aida are cackling while they gather up napkins eases his mind.

He grabs Karamatsu by the hand and leads him out, tossing his coffee cup on the way. There’s not much choice on Karamatsu’s part, except he doesn’t particularly look as if he minds that.

“You didn’t… have to do that, Totty,” Karamatsu mumbles. When Totty glances over, the second eldest looks more tired than anything. He knows that look; the exhaustion of something not working out, of thinking you had a chance only for it to all go up in smoke.

Totty huffs, marching the two of them in the direction that leads back home. “Of course I did! You weren’t going to do it, so someone had to. God… you’ve gotta stop letting people walk all over you, Karamatsu-nii-chan.”

The shift to the more affectionate honorific suggests to Karamatsu that this is really, truly something Totty cares about. He squeezes his baby brother’s hand with a thoughtful hum. “… If that’s the case, perhaps a romance for me just isn’t in the cards. I… really thought it was going to go somewhere this time.”

At last Totty slows slightly, from an aggressive pace to something a little calmer. He’s still pissed off that someone treated Karamatsu like that, and although he’s a bit upset that Karamatsu sit there and let it happen, he knows what it’s like to want people to like you so much that you’ll put up with nearly anything.

However, that’s also the reason he doesn’t want Karamatsu just putting up with it. He deserves so much better than to have people treat him like dirt. It’s not right to do that to anybody, but… especially not to Totty’s big brother.

“I’m sorry I kind of… tapped into Murder Totty in there,” he sighs. “Did I go overboard?”

Karamatsu shrugs. “Maybe a little. But I wasn’t truly enjoying myself and I didn’t want to go on another date with her. I just… didn’t know how to tell her no. I suppose I really am lucky you were there, too.”

Silence falls between them while they walk, then after a moment, Karamatsu clears his throat. “Totty… did you… mean all those things?”

“Huh? All what things?”

“Those things, you know… you said I was… kind and passionate and reliable.” He lets out a soft laugh. “You… you said you’d rather break your phone than let me go out with her again.”

… Oh. He. Did say that, didn’t he?

He pouts a bit, then squeezes Karamatsu’s hand. “Yeah, I meant it. Of course I meant it.”

Beat.

“But as much as I love you, I’m just glad I don’t have to do that.”

[leviiattacks]

How about Levi x reader, where they get set up on a blind date by their friends as a prank, but actually end up liking each other

note :: honestly not my best at all but it was cute i guess T___T kinda an opposites attract thing also it’s a modern au !!

for some reason hange and sasha wake up one morning and decide they want to wreak havoc

it’s not peculiar coming from them

after all they are always up to something

like the one time sasha purposefully trapped herself in an elevator with a hot guy

or the time hange tried to make coffee with an energy drink mixed in it??

OR-

okay you’re getting sidetracked

but the point is they have no real reason for this new venture of theirs

when do they ever have a reason though?

somehow today their scheming has led to them begging you to go on a blind date

“he’s not my type i mean he’s old and whatever but you would like him” sasha’s stuffing her face with a buttery croissant

she doesn’t sound very convincing

then again, you have no objections to the idea

you’re single

you’re lonely

if it doesn’t end in love well ??? guess you could fuck

and if you don’t fuck well ?? you got to go outside and get some fresh air

BUT

the idea of blind dating makes you squirm

the uncertainty which comes along with the situation is intimidating

honestly, part of you is worried you’ll end up making a mortal enemy at dinner, not a lover

the other portion is petrified you’ll end up on a date with a murderer

what if it ends up like that one netflix show and you end up getting stalked????

you shudder at that thought

BE OPTIMISTIC Y/N!! YUP YUP OPTIMIST ERA!!!

levi feels the same way but his version of nervous is very different to your own

his fears are very different

what if his date appears prim and proper but it’s really just a huge facade hiding how their house is a pigsty?

imagine the third date in is a movie night in and he walks into a landfill site...

what if his date chews their food obnoxiously loud?

what if they just dislike him?

that’s why ideally he would prefer dating someone he knows beforehand

but there’s no one he knows already that he’s interested in

that’s exactly why when hange calls levi and asks him if he’s willing to go on a blind date on such short notice he scoffs and tells them that maybe if they got a life they would know that his answer is a straight no

he’s used to people not pairing well with him

he guesses it’s because of his sardonic personality, maybe it’s his occupation - he is constantly busy after all. perhaps it’s his foul mouth

erwin told him the last time he had a date that he should probably ease up on the cursing but it’s levi...

he isn’t going to change for anyone.

and really if him being little mean is that much of a deal breaker he won’t bother looking for anyone

he’ll go it solo he supposes

“LEVI. PLEASE. you both would fit together like jigsaw pieces.” hange is practically begging

then they stop for a second and wiggle their eyebrows “that can have many alternative meaningssss~”

levi purses his lips and shoots them a hard glare

“shut it, i’m not going. i’m busy.”

“busy doing.....?”

“cleaning i need t-”

“NO??? do it some other time please they’re smart, fun AND not boring at all.”

hange gives him a pleading look then explains how his mystery date has already agreed for sasha’s sake and he really can’t stand you up

“you want me to go on a blind date with one of SASHA BRAUS’ friends????”

he looks at hange in utter disbelief because that means you just have to be loud mouthed and annoying like jean or connie

or just be as stupidly unfunny

he shakes his head rejecting the idea completely

“i enjoy sophisticated people.”

hange sighs heavily

“give it a chance! c’monnn what if i bribe you?”

little does levi know hange and sasha have purposefully picked you out because of the way you’re both polar opposites

where levi loves order you’re disorderly, where he follows his own rules you don’t follow any at all, where he is disagreeable you’re agreeable in every way of the word

where he is cold, you are warm, he’s a night owl, you’re an early bird, you’re day and he’s night

everything about the two of you is different

that isn’t necessarily bad, but sasha and hange find it hilarious enough to set you both up on this date

if it fails it’ll still be funny

you’re rummaging through your closet looking for your favourite perfume because to be frank you are NOT showing up unprepared

like?? what if he moves in to hug you and he smells the scent of the chicken you were cooking today

yeah you did have a shower but sometimes you wonder if the smell lingers

you KNOW it doesn’t but it’s a matter of principle

imagine he leans in and smells marinated chicken

you think you’d die on the spot if that were to ever happen

shoving a pack of mints in your purse along with your emergency pepper spray you give your outfit a once over

it’s nothing too extravagant but it’ll do the job

at this point, everything is great! you’re walking out of your door and you’re pumped up

you’ll be early for once and there’s a spring in your step

making a good first impressions is key here

you’re so close to your uber BUT

then you hear it

it’s almost inaudible but you’re sure you hear a mewl come out of the alleyway to your right

you’re about to ignore it because you aren’t even sure if you’ve heard it correctly

and it’s late you don’t feel like wandering into an empty alleyway

but the sound only repeats itself

fuck.

cautiously venturing inside you see it.

eyes softening you look at the stray kitten in front of you and bite your bottom lip and scoop him up in your arms you’re debating if running back to your apartment and leaving him there is the best option

what’s the other option?

well you could bring the cat along with you...

it would be a funny story for the future if the date goes well

now. unlike you levi is nowhere near late

in fact he’s ten minutes early waiting promptly outside of the restaurant in his white button up

he fiddles with his collar and wonders how the actual hell he got talked into doing this

hange offering to buy him cleaning supplies free of charge is probably it

8:15pm, you were meant to be here five minutes ago

if you’ve stood him up he’s going to end hange for wasting his precious free time

especially when he rarely interrupts his schedule for anyone.

a few moments of silence pass and he thinks

how do you look? 

not like it matters to him

but he’d just like to know

okay, so.

it’s 8:30pm now

levi is royally pissed off that you even have the audacity to show up

you’re holding your knees as you puff in and out

“I’M SORRY. i know i’ve wasted all your time but i saw a stray on my way here and i couldn’t leave him”

the updo your hair is in is disheveled and fly aways stick out

you’ve ran here after your uber broke down that much is obvious.

to be fair, your explanation is believable and he would have let it slide if and only if

you had NOT brought the fucking cat along with you???

he’s eyeing it with disgust as it purrs up against you and you coo at it stroking its fur

“you want to sneak a cat into the restaurant?” he asks in pure disbelief

sheepishly grinning and scratching the back of your neck your response is “well i know we can’t but if you tried to i wouldn’t mind because i really like this cat :-(”

when hange said he’d have fun they were lying

but at least they didn’t lie about you not being boring.

he picks the cat up with one of his hands

looks it in the eyes

sighs then places him carefully into your purse

“don’t let him be seen.”

you light up and try to hide the grin forming on your face

he isn’t that bad

he’s a little too serious for your liking but you can handle that.

the two of you walk into the restaurant and fuck you because the cat has to start mewling and screeching

coughing rather aggressively to cover it up it miraculously goes unheard

he shoots you a sturdy glare because he’s able to hear the muffled sounds

luckily, no one else is standing near you or is within earshot.

gulping you realise this is not a good first impression at all

late to the date, bringing a cat with you, begging him to help you sneak the cat in

you feel guilty, he probably expected way better

“oi, move your ass” he snaps

you look up realising you’ve been too lost in thought to see levi walking in front of you

“sorry” you mumble

he doesn’t respond but he does look back at you

you can’t gather anything from his face because it’s either plain or he’s got his brows furrowed

currently it’s showing no signs of distaste so he must be accepting your apology

he’s kind enough, steps out of the way to offer you the space to sit down first

he sits after you and you have no idea where to look

then the cat cries again from your purse

“lucifer, shhhhh”

you’re patting him and try to silence him

“you’ve named it already?”

laughing to yourself you’re happy he’s initiated the conversation first

“he’s a little sneaky so i called him it. do you have any other names you’d like?”

“why would my input in this matter be relevant?”

“you’re basically his family now!”

he’s covering his mouth with his hands and you swear you can see the pink tinge of a blush creep upwards and flood his cheeks

but this man doesn’t seem like the type to blush over anything.

composing himself he sticks a hand out and finally asks “what’s your name?”

coming back to your senses you realize it’s been twenty minutes since you’ve met and you haven’t even had the manners to ask his name even after arriving late

“Y/N!! what’s yours?”

play it cool!!!

he doesn’t respond instead stares at your purse and points with his index finger

lucifer has escaped again and now you really are regretting bringing him along with you

whilst you’re grabbing the cat and hushing him your date hums “try to guess it.”

well, that’s spontaneous, he doesn’t seem like the type to entertain himself with games

you think hard, he’s serious but he is kind, you guess that’s why he reminds you of sebastian from the little mermaid

get it? because he’s sweet but he’s a crab so he’s crabby??

god that joke is AWFUL because it doesn't even take into account the actual character of sebastian the crab

but you have no other guesses available.

“hmm... sebastian?” you jokingly ask

“it’s levi.” he deadpans.

oh wow you couldn’t be more far off

playing around with your fingers in your lap you fidget nervously looking around for a waiter to interrupt the conversation

levi has to sense your unease because his tone loosens up

“...do i really look like a sebastian though?”

looking back up at him your bite your lip keeping a giggle in

you can sense the ghost of a smile on his face

“yeah like the crab from a little mermaid”

at that he scowls but he inquires what exactly that means

the rest of the date goes without a hitch, sure there’s a few moments where lucifer attempts to sneak away but levi has no problems stopping him

it takes a while but the conversation flows easily after the awkward barrier from before is broken down

it’s lighthearted and calm.

he’s humorous in a way you can’t describe

levi’s mannerisms are cute, everything about him is endearing despite the serious front he has

and you can’t quite put your finger on it but his demeanor is charming

overall you find yourself enjoying the date even more than you expected

now the two of you are walking away from the booth and the fresh night time air hits your face as you step outside

turning to him you smile radiantly and without allowing him to get a word in you take your opportunity by the reins

“second date?”

you don’t normally make the first move but you’re eager

and to your surprise he’s just as eager as you are.

it doesn’t even look like he stops to think before he nods and agrees to meet with you again.

exchanging numbers with him you wave as you and lucifer part ways with levi feeling satisfied

and to his shock after you leave it settles, levi thinks he just might enjoy your presence

well, that’s a first for him.

he guesses what they say about opposites attracting is true

[vivianweasley]

Pride and Prejudice (Chapter 2)

Summary: Your father is Lucius Malfoy’s cousin, and after the war, it was really difficult for you to find a job because of your last name. So your mother and Mrs. Weasley came up with a crazy idea. A fake marriage between you and Fred Weasley.  

In this chapter: you became friends with the twins, and you took Fred to an amusement park to celebrate finally receiving a job offer.

Pairing: Fred Weasley x Malfoy!Fem!Reader

Warnings: mention of food, Ferris Wheel, slight mention of rollercoasters (the amusement park usual)

Word count: 2.3k

disclaimer: all the pictures used in the header are from Pinterest. Credit goes to the original owners.

Please do NOT repost or translate my work! Thank you!! Reblogs and comments are always welcome:)

Prologue // Chapter 1 

“No! This is not happening!” Fred shook his head furiously when you informed him that you were actually going to stay at his place for as long as your fake marriage was going to last.

You didn’t want to do this either, and you made sure to stay at your parents’ house until the house-elves decided to move your stuff outside for you. “Please! A year isn’t even that long,” you tried your best to look at him with the most sincere eyes, “You won’t even notice me! I will try to stay at my friends’ place as often as possible!”

“Okay, fine!” Looking at your puppy eyes, Fred found himself beginning to cave in, “You can sleep on this couch. Good night!” 

He tried to slip back into his room before making any further sacrifices, but George’s voice stopped him, “Couch? Surely you’re not going to let our guest sleep on the couch?”

Fred glared at George, for he knew his brother was just trying to mess with him. “She’s not our guest. She’s also family now, so she will understand.”

Fred tried to escape again, but George was silently judging him, and you were putting on those puppy eyes again. He sighed and finally decided, “Fine. You said you could do three things for me, right? Okay, the first thing I want you to do is to sleep on this couch.”

“You sure?” You raised your eyebrows, for you were surprised that he would use the first wish so quickly and on something so small, but you saw him nodding. “Fine. Reckless, though, but I accept.”

A smug smile appeared on Fred’s lips as he turned to George, “Problem solved. Good night, family.”

You sat on the couch after unpacking everything. If getting a marriage certificate still didn’t make you realize that this crazy fake marriage was actually happening, you sure realized it now. You and Fred Weasley were on the same team now, and you had to find a way to get along with each other. It’s only for a year, you thought, shouldn’t be difficult. 

Fred lay in his bed, tossing and turning. It started as a joke, a crazy dare, but now there’s a woman sleeping on his couch. Was the couch even comfortable? Fred suddenly felt guilt rising in his stomach, but why should he feel guilty for not giving up his own bed to you? You were the one who was intruding. But it wasn’t your fault though...Fred groaned as his conscience fought this battle that he believed to be unnecessary. This shouldn’t be this difficult.

George was the only one who slept well in this house tonight. In fact, he fell asleep with a smile, knowing that his brother’s life was about to change. This should be fun!

~

Fred woke up the next morning to the smell of breakfast and the sound of laughter. He walked outside and almost jumped when he saw you in his kitchen this early in the morning. Oh right, he just got married.

You and George were cooking breakfast and chatting, and weirdly, this made Fred feel left out. He cleared his throat, and you two finally noticed him.

“Oh, morning!” You and George said in unison, which caused a small frown on Fred’s face. 

“You know how to cook?” Fred blurted out. He wanted to say good morning to you too, but this question came out first, for this scene shocked him. Didn’t you grow up having house elves do everything for you?

“It’s just scrambled egg, genius,” you replied bitterly, “and good morning to you too.”

Then you and George continued cooking and chatting about potential product ideas. Fred was not surprised that you had so many great ideas. After all, he’s had his pranks backfire on him when he tried to prank you before. But he was surprised that you sounded so excited and interested when you were talking about the joke shop. He always assumed that you would think it wasn’t a serious or mature career choice.

Fred wanted to join the conversation, but there was simply no opportunity for him to chip in. He found himself speechless and sitting awkwardly at the table. He also noticed that you sounded friendlier and softer when you were talking to George, and that made him think. If George didn’t have a girlfriend, would he be your fake husband instead? Would that be a better option for you?

Fred felt weirdly defeated. There was something about you that could always make him admit defeat, and he’s definitely not a fan of this feeling.

~

For the next few days, you had nowhere to go and nothing to do while you wait for the result of the interview, so you decided to help at the joke shop. You were staying at their place after all. This was the least you could do.

You had to admit that aside from having to sleep on the couch, living and working with Fred and George wasn’t so bad. Your everyday life was never dull, for they always had little jokes and pranks here and there. You were even beginning to think if you were friends back at Hogwarts, how fun would it be?

And to your surprise, Fred was a completely different person when he was at work. He knew his products well, and he sounded so passionate when he was introducing them to his customers. He’s also surprisingly good and patient with kids. This was nothing like the irresponsible and immature troublemaker you assumed he was. 

Plus, he looked pretty good in his business suit. The shirt fit his body nicely, and the rolled-up sleeves perfectly showed off the line of his arm muscles. For a moment, you even felt proud to have him as your fake husband.

“Are you staring at me?” Fred’s voice almost made you fall off your chair.

“No, I’m not!” You panicked and raised your voice to cover for the fact that you were indeed drooling over your fake husband.

“Yea, you are. I saw it,” Fred leaned forward and teased, “Aww Y/N, are you in love with me now?”

You tried to stay calm and stared back into his eyes, but you could hear your heartbeat growing louder. “You wish.”

“Y/N! It’s here!” George’s voice made both of you jump and pull away from each other immediately. You were still trying to figure out how to act normal, but the letter in George’s hand just made your heart beat faster. 

You recognized the logo of Whizz Hard Books. This was it. This was the letter that contained the result of the interview and your fate. You tore open the envelope as soon as George handed it to you and read the letter immediately.

After re-reading the letter for the third time, you finally looked up with your eyes wide open and eyebrows furrowed. 

“Well, what does it say?” Fred had the same expression as you.

“It says...I’ve got the job?” Those words sounded even stranger when you said them out loud. It took you a good minute for the news to finally sink in. “I’ve got the job! I’ve got a job!!”

You waited for this moment for so long. The overwhelming joy washed over you, and when you finally regained your senses, you realized you were cheering and hugging Fred, and your faces were only inches away. You pulled away, coughing awkwardly. 

“So...What do you want to do to celebrate?” Fred spoke first, breaking the awkward silence.

“I have an idea!” You said as you grabbed Fred’s arm. You were still overjoyed that you weren’t fully aware of what you were doing, but Fred’s breath hitched when your fingertips touched his skin.

You held out your hand to George, “George, you coming with us?”

“Sorry, I’ve got a date tonight,” George came up with an excuse. How could he interrupt when he noticed that little change in Fred’s expression when you invited him too?

~

When Fred opened his eyes again, he gasped, “Muggle amusement park?” A Malfoy brought him to an amusement park? A muggle amusement park?

“Yea, this is my favorite place!” You realized he was surprised because a stereotypical Malfoy shouldn’t be interested in anything in the muggle world, but you didn’t want to waste your time arguing with him when you saw the booth ahead. “C’mon!”

It doesn’t count as going to an amusement park if you didn’t get a cute headband, and you were finding this cat ears headband in front of you absolutely adorable. But what fun would it be if nobody was wearing it with you?

You soon picked out a bunny ears headband for Fred, but when you turned to him, he was already looking into the mirror, wearing the same cat headband.

“I think it looks better on me, don’t you think?” He winked at you.

You rolled your eyes, “No, I don’t. I’m claiming this one. You have to pick another one.”

“No, if anyone has to change today, it’s you.”

“I’m not changing!”

“I think the lady wears it better.” You and Fred looked down, and it was a little boy who complimented you.

“Oh, thank you!” You beamed at the boy and turned to look at Fred with a smug smile, “You heard that, now go change.”

But the little boy asked again, “Is he your boyfriend?”

“What? Oh, no! He’s not my boyfriend,” you answered quickly with an awkward laugh.

But Fred chimed in, “I’m her husband, actually.” 

The boy left with a disappointed face, but Fred was smiling at you like he just won a competition, and this successfully made your cheeks heat up. “Why do you have to say that to a kid?” 

“Cause it was on your contract, remember? The fewer people know, the better, right?” he smiled innocently, “I’m just trying to follow the rules.”

“O..kay.” You squinted. Fred Weasley trying to follow the rules? What day is it today?

“So, do I still have to pick another one?”

“No, keep it. You look great with it.” You finally admitted.

He raised his eyebrows at your answer but soon beamed at you, “You look pretty good with it, too.”

Your heart skipped a beat when he looked into your eyes. Luckily, the queue not far from you caught your attention and saved you from doing anything embarrassing. “C’mon, hurry up! The queue isn’t too long now!” you grabbed his arm and started running. 

Fred was surprised that no matter how many times you’ve done this, your fingertips could always send electro waves up his body. And he had to admit he was starting to like that feeling.

You dragged him everywhere, going from rollercoaster rides to the carousel. Fred was amazed to see you this happy and excited. You were nothing like the stuck-up, cold, pureblood princess he thought you were. Not to mention that every time you smiled at him, he could feel his heart skipping a beat.

~

Your amusement park adventure ended with the Ferris Wheel. It was your favorite way to end the night. From above here, you could see the entire park and the city. You knew flying on a broom could give you a broader and better view, but the Ferris Wheel had a more romantic tone to it. 

“What’s your favorite today?” Fred asked.

“Hmm...I loved that ride for kids because you were so scared,” you joked.

“No, I was not!” Fred protested, “but you have to agree that was a really creepy ride.”

“Agree. Don’t know why they had to make things so creepy for kids,” you laughed and finally answered his question seriously, “It’s actually now. The Ferris Wheel is my favorite part, and you will know why in a minute. What’s yours, though?”

Fred was about to answer, but the sound of fireworks stopped him.

“Ah! Right on time!” you exclaimed as the fireworks exploded into flowers of fire in the night sky, and the Ferris Wheel had the perfect view for it.

Fred’s eyes widened as butterflies in his stomach were completely out of control. The city lights and the fairy lights of the park twinkled as the fireworks continued to bloom. And you looked so beautiful when you were smiling and gazing at the firework outside. Everything was so perfectly romantic, and Fred found himself helpless when he answered your previous question, “Mine’s actually the Ferris Wheel, too.”

~

When you finally got home, you just wanted to jump on your couch and sleep. But before you could do that, Fred stopped you.

“You...You could sleep on my bed if you want. I will sleep on the couch tonight.”

“Are you sure? But I thought you-”

“Yea, consider this as a gift for getting a job.”

You were surprised. Didn’t he love his bed so much that he used one wish to keep it? But he looked sure, and a smile appeared on your lips, “Well, then I will gladly accept your gift. Good night, Freddie!”

“Good night, Y/N,” Fred replied, couldn’t help but smile when he heard you calling him that.

“You fancy her, don’t you?” George finally walked out of his room after you went into Fred’s room.

“Pff, no,” Fred rolled his eyes when he could basically hear George’s smirk without even looking at him, “I just...think she’s pretty cool.”

“Yea, right. Good night, brother.”

After George went back to his room too, Fred was lying awake on the couch, trying to find a way to fit himself on this uncomfortably small couch. When he was tossing and turning, he realized he wasn’t regretting wasting his first wish and giving up his bed to you, but feeling guilty that he made you sleep here for more than a week. 

You were all he could think about now. Just a few days ago, you were no different from the other obnoxious Malfoys to him, but now you were a real person. Someone who would pout when he refused to change the headband with you. Someone who would laugh at his endless bad puns about amusement parks. Someone whose smile could make his heart flutter.

Oh Merlin, he thought, maybe George was right.

Chapter 3

~

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[incorrect-ikevamp-quotes]

i saw your post about Charles and what his personality past and part in the story line so i was wondering if u could do the same for vlad? :)

Ah, well, I can at least let you know what I’ve seen so far? I haven’t delved too far into Vlad, and some of his general impressions can be confusing, so I’ll do my best to make it sensible and unbiased! Here you go lovely <33333

Fair warning, there will be mentions of a lot of JPN app content since Vlad and his boys aren’t around much in the ENG app yet.

My general sense of Vlad is basically discount vampire Sasuke Uchiha.

What I mean by this is to say–according to what I’ve read so far–his clan/family were murdered by vampire hunters in cold blood when he was just a young boy. Presumably as a result of that traumatic event, he harbors a sizable enmity towards humanity and kind of lashes out on them in weirdly specific moments of violence. Another aspect of his motivation is something that’s mentioned within Comte’s route; which is that Vlad went through the timespace door on his own one day and allegedly saw a devastated future, where nothing remains of life on earth more or less.

I guess the reason I find him to be so perplexing is that he speaks about his actions in terms of efficiency, while most of the things he does just feel like unhappy outbursts (v often a product of unresolved trauma symptoms, I’d wager.) I also say this because he appears to have no larger pattern to his fury beyond the original event of his loss. Most of the human beings he attacks aren’t much of a threat to him and hurting them really doesn’t bring him any dividends beyond revenge.

For instance, he insists his disdain for humanity and insistence on controlling them is for the sake of ensuring they do not destroy the future–the horrifying wasteland he witnessed when he traveled through the timespace door. However, I’m not really sure how his current movements really speak to that goal? I mean sure, maybe he’s relying on Faust to create an immortal human so that humans will be forced to care because it will be their future too, but he doesn’t allow Faust to draw his pureblood blood for experimenting. (One can most certainly argue this was more about a lack of trust, and perhaps for plenty reason: Faust is vindictive enough to try to turn the tables and exert control over Vlad, or act on his own whims with his findings.) But if that’s the solution he’s waiting on, turning the rivals of the men in the mansion doesn’t really bring him any closer to that vision either? I mean, what good does it do to bring back Gilles de Rais–a prominent French serial killer? How would unleashing him on the populace help humanity “realize the error of it’s short-sighted and wasteful ways” and move to a brighter future?

Can’t help it, I ask these questions as I read.

In Comte’s main story, Comte hammers home that Vlad is not somebody to be taken lightly. One day when MC goes out to buy flowers, Vlad poses as a human florist to sell them to her–which is how Comte finds out he’s in France, and that he’s made contact with MC. When prompted, Comte describes him in a very particular way; and I think people really overlook this when they talk about their relationship. He says that Vlad is frighteningly pure in terms of the way he thinks and acts. The way I understood his description (given what I’ve seen of Vlad) is that Comte really does mean it point blank: Vlad is very simple in terms of why and how he does things. The issue with this is that nuance and context are lost on Vlad as well–and that’s where the problems start to flood in. Vlad is angry at humanity for what they’ve done to him. Baseline? That’s fair, they killed his damn family. However, Vlad thinks that by extension he has the right to decimate the general public and attack people completely uninvolved in his hurt.

And that isn’t right either–it’s ignoring so many factors here. He’s ignoring how much vampires use and toy with humans as pawns, it’s ignoring the massive power imbalance between him and his victims (this really isn’t a case of self-defense most of the time, nobody but Comte/Leo is a sizable threat to him), and he’s ignoring whether or not a person even did anything to deserve his retributive violence. While murder is never okay, it is perhaps more understandable when we see Jeanne’s frenzied and violent belligerence in response to a man who murders a boy’s mother for the sake of his own amusement/convenience. Vlad literally sees almost every single one of the rivals he created begin to heal/improve and murders them in cold blood because they are no longer of any use to him. That’s uh……..that’s a little messed, not gonna lie to you chief.

While part of me understands the efficiency here–he doesn’t want to leave any traces of his involvement, he doesn’t want any loose ends–it’s also just kind of foolish and cruel ultimately. From my understanding of the narrative, all the people he turned had some visible sign that indicated their origin to Comte. So even if he claims it was for the sake of concealment, it was more likely about his personal convenience. Which…..also yikes.

[Comte clearly does not trust Vlad to be reasonable, and I think there’s plenty of good reason enumerated above, but I actually don’t sense quite so much hatred? I think he’s just given up on the idea of Vlad growing up, even if he doesn’t like giving up on people. And considering Vlad’s behavior, I think it’s overkill to say that Comte just abandons him because he doesn’t care lmao. Even when Comte expresses real anger at the end of his own route, it was more because Vlad was fine with endangering MC’s life just to get back at him. I think Comte’s unhappiness with Vlad has more to do with Vlad’s treatment of human life as meaningless and worthless. It’s fascinating but also kind of sad? Vlad’s traumatic experience results in behavior that is a direct exacerbation of Comte’s trauma, and as such--no matter their potentially fond history--they can’t stomach each other.]

In Comte’s route, Vlad also has Shakespeare abduct MC and take her to the cathedral. Later on in the castle, we see an immediate display of Vlad’s shocking powers: he has the ability to manipulate people’s desires/thoughts. I’m not exactly sure how this works, but he is able to give MC visions of the mansion and Comte coming on to her–which shocks her into realizing it’s all just a dream. It’s not reality; it’s all manufactured by Vlad.

After that...weird introductory note...Vlad gives MC the rundown on his life together with Comte, which as always is subject to a question of bias. My assumption is that he did not lie, only because he was trying to convince MC that he was “right.” Furthermore, he does not omit the most damning evidence of his erroneous judgement, which suggests a continued inability for him to see where he went wrong.

We get a series of three flashbacks. The first is them as young kids. I don’t know if Vlad had already experienced the horrors of his family being destroyed, but this particular flashback focuses on Comte. His parents, in an effort to teach him that vampires and humans have no ability to co-exist, send away all of his teachers/mentors/nannies/the servants--pretty much everyone and anyone he was closely bonded to. Think about it this way: we can see that Comte is very sociable and affectionate by nature. He was living in a house full of people, all of whom cared about him and looked after him in their own way. Now the house is entirely empty. Naturally Comte is very very upset, and Vlad appears to try to cheer him up with little success. 

[When I look back on this scene I don’t think I initially registered the sheer dissonance of Vlad’s reaction, versus Comte’s catatonic misery. There was a very solemn feeling to that memory, and the correct choice in terms of extending comfort is to hold his hand believe it or not. There is a sense that he feels very alone. When young boy Vlad enters one can argue that it was the proper thing to do; he was trying to cheer up his playmate and friend. But at the same time, I think I need to double check. Because I’m beginning to wonder if I was wrong. What if Vlad was happy to see someone as alone as him, and that joy is accordingly dissonant for that reason? He can’t see what Comte needs or how he’s hurting because he’s so glad he isn’t alone anymore in a way.]

The second flashback is the war nurse scene that I have spoken at length about. The important thing to focus on here is Vlad’s surprise that Comte would opt out of turning her out of respect for her wishes. The way Vlad frames the situation is starkly different from Comte’s. Comte sees himself as an outsider, somebody who invaded her life as a result of the timespace door and therefore has no right to suddenly change the course of her fate. He had no idea if she even wanted to live (considering the horrors she’d have to cope with and remember) or leave that time period at all, for that matter (considering the only thing keeping her going was helping the wounded/victims). Comte really was listening to everything she had to say, and he was taking her concerns and motivations seriously. 

Vlad simply says: if you want her, take her. It’s as simple as that for him. And in one way that’s not entirely wrong--assuming Comte would have every intention of looking after her and actually cares a lot about her. But what’s being ignored here is her agency and the fact that they really don’t know each other that well? Something like that could begin and be rocky, if it doesn’t end in complete disaster. Worse, I get the feeling Vlad is perfectly fine with the notion of turning her and if things don’t work out, just kill her or get rid of her. Again, the simplistic thinking comes into play here: it ultimately comes down to Vlad being self-centered. He’s thinking only in terms of satisfying his needs, he doesn’t seem to have any concept of a larger pair or group feeling. There’s an inability to bend/be flexible for the sake of maintaining a greater harmonious feeling. 

[For the record, I don’t think this makes him irredeemable? Only that it makes it very hard to live with him or love him, probably. There’s an inability to live at a joint pace? It’s always answering to what he wants without room for anything else most of the time, which to me is not living and it’s not love ;;;;]

Following their escape back to their own time, Vlad explains how he wants to use the door to turn geniuses and control humanity. He eventually wants to create a surveillance state, which would mean everyone is forced to move with his explicit approval, more or less. (He almost reminds me of Louis XIV, can’t tell if that’s what they were going for.) I have my doubts that his abilities could extend that far, but human history shows us that we are plenty susceptible to fascist and totalitarian rhetoric. In a shocking display of anger, Comte draws the line at controlling humanity and forcing them into a regime in which, and this is Vlad’s description not mine, “we (purebloods) would be like kings.” There’s definitely a concept of evolutionary superiority at play here, which echoes what I mentioned earlier; vampires seem to have this awareness that they’re apex predators in a sense, and enjoy the power that comes with that. Unfortunately, that probably makes for a fairly toxic/uncomfortable larger species culture, which is exactly what Comte and Leo hate lmao.

Vlad does not seem to find any issue with this sort of outlook, and asks MC to decide which of them--Vlad or Comte--is right. Who is more realistic, who best understands the future? As expected the MC replies that it's Comte, and Vlad goes from beseeching to big mad at record speed. He's p much that gif of the teddy bear that smacks its head down on the tables and then has the angry eyebrows.

This is where Comte intervenes, firing a warning shot that grazes Vlad's cheek and demanding he let MC go. In response, Vlad shoves MC into the turbulent timespace door--p much guaranteeing MC's death. (Essentially timespace is a void of sorts, a human being could never survive in that environment for long. Vlad fully knew this, and yeeted her anyway.)

So uh, yeah. Disagreement? Death. Moving on? Death. Nuanced approach to reality? Death. Beginning to think he doesn't really have a lot of patience or open-mindedness or any other kind of problem-solving approach. 

He raises flowers and gardens like a fiend, and he openly plucks any single flower with a blemished leaf. Even if a single petal is slightly damaged, it will be removed and destroyed. So one could argue his extremism reflects a kind of perfectionism as well. No room for errors or troublesome dissent. No ugliness of any kind. I mean in all of his interactions with Faust and Charles this is the overt undertone. Don't ask more of me than I'm willing to give. Behave like good children, mommy's busy. Is that insubordination? boss music begins

One thing I actually don't understand very well is his decision making in Dazai's route. Dazai finds out about what Vlad's doing in a nanosecond when he senses MC is in danger, and yet Vlad makes absolutely no move to eliminate Dazai? He just watches from the shadows. Even when Dazai grills Charles about his loyalty to Vlad, no retribution.

My best guess for this specific situation is that Vlad does derive some level of satisfaction thwarting the future of human beings/former humans. Dazai--being somebody with no great desire to live, no rivals to speak of as far as we can tell, and no larger aspirations--is a life that is easily extinguished. There's no satisfaction in it. When Vlad's clan was murdered and he saw the future decimated, it could be that he felt humans had invaded and eradicated every potentiality that was important to him. Where he might have lived happily with his family, that future was ripped from his grasp. Where he might enjoy his flowers and the creation of an immortal for the rest of conceivable time, that too was ripped from his grasp with a desolate future. 

So much about who Vlad is is about control, so it's very possible his lashing out is an extension of that. Dazai does not awaken any of the disdain he feels, and he does not succeed in overthrowing Vlad's control over Charles, so Vlad simply lurks in silence.

And last but not least, I've seen the preview to Vlad's newest birthday event story. The contents are incredibly revealing, in that MC wishing him a happy birthday and offering him a gift has him saying that it was "the best birthday ever." Granted idk if that’s sweet or just...beyond sad, but here we are. It’s only compounding my curiosity about the wound on his chest--I really do wonder if he was attacked and locked away by vampire hunters or hostile human beings or something. I say that only because that line speaks to a lot of isolation, and given how little he seems to care about turning people/subjecting them to his whims it feels odd. Why the isolation or lack of people who care about him? Is it a perceived lack where his actions alienated all the people who wanted to be close to him, or is it a more involuntary lack?

When she says let’s celebrate again next year, he seems a pleasantly shocked by the notion, and remarks “Ah yes, it’s a promise c:”. The preview was also mega horny: “You make me feel so loved, I don’t think I can be gentle with you tonight. If you enjoy it so much, then I won’t stop. I want to see you completely lost for me. I’ll teach your body what it means to be loved by a pureblood.” Aaaaaand pretty sure the CG was alluding to him licking the good stuff from her basement, though not entirely sure given it was only the preview. 

The brief POV they give us is also very revealing:

“You always keep your promises, and I think I underestimate all the time how much you saved me. You are good, only you are good in this world.”

“Will we continue to make promises to each other in the future? Well in that case--you will always, always be mine, my vampire.”

Tbh he’s...v sweet? In his own way? Honestly he feels like a crabapple that is just so sick of the world and wants softe wife to take comfort in. While granted that’s not really my thing, I know a fanbase appeal exists for these types--so if that’s your thing, have at it!

So now that we have reached the end of my ridiculously long analysis (when am I ever brief, I’m so sorry. If you made it all the way here you deserve a cookie at the very least, if not the right to chase me with a bat) perhaps it’s more clear why I said discount vampire Sasuke Uchiha? “My clan is gone, every other second I’m going to be in retraumatization insanity, when I’m not I’ll be seeking power/hobbies, planning the demise of people who wanted the best for me, building a team to my advantage and unquestioned control, and eventually settling for a lifelong love who sees the best in me despite my more difficult moments and perceived hollowing loneliness. Not the most ideal comparison, but I will say if Vlad was not already named the historical figure, would have pointed and yelled Uchiha.

That’s all from me folks, hopefully this was a fun way to get introduced to him? And again, hope I didn’t alienate--I fully respect what people do and don’t enjoy o7

[princesssarisa]

Some more “Little Women” remarks: the problem of Beth

I honestly think most commentary I’ve read about Beth’s character is bad, both academic and from casual readers.

I understand why. She’s a difficult character. Modern readers who love Little Women and want to celebrate it as a proto-feminist work need to contend with the presence of this thoroughly domestic, shy, sweetly self-effacing character, seemingly the opposite of everything a feminist heroine should be. Meanwhile, other readers who despise Little Women and consider it anti-feminist cite Beth as the embodiment of its supposedly outdated morals. Then there’s the fact that she’s based on Louisa May Alcott’s actual sister, Lizzie Alcott, and does show hints of the real young woman’s complexity, and yet she’s much more idealized than the other sisters, which often makes readers view her as more of a symbol (of what they disagree, but definitely a symbol) than a real person.

But even though the various bad takes on her character are understandable, they’re still obnoxious, and in my humble opinion, not founded in the text.

Here are my views on some of the critics’ opinions I least agree with.

“She’s nothing but a bland, boring model of feminine virtue.”

Of course it’s fair to find her bland and boring. Everyone is entitled to feel how they feel about any character. But she’s not just a cardboard cutout of 19th century feminine virtue. So many people seem to dismiss her shyness as just the maidenly modesty that conduct books used to encourage. But it seems blatantly obvious to me that it’s more than just that. Beth’s crippling shyness is actively portrayed as her “burden,” just like Jo’s temper or Meg and Amy’s vanity and materialism. She struggles with it. Her parents have homeschooled her because her anxiety made the classroom unbearable for her – no conduct book has ever encouraged that! In Part 1, she has a character arc of overcoming enough of her shyness to make new friends like Mr. Laurence and Frank Vaughn. Then, in Part 2, she has the arc of struggling to accept her impending death: she doesn’t face it with pure serenity, but goes through a long journey of both physical and emotional pain before she finds peace in the end. Her character arcs might be quieter and subtler than her sisters’, but she’s not the static figure she’s often misremembered as being.

‘She needs to die because her life has no meaning outside of her family and the domestic sphere.”

In all fairness, Beth believes this herself: she says she was “never meant” to live long because she’s just “stupid little Beth,” with no plans for the future and of no use to anyone outside the home. But for readers to agree with that assessment has massive unfortunate implications! The world is full of both women and men who – whether because of physical or mental illness, disability, autism, Down Syndrome, or some other reason – can’t attend regular school, don’t make friends easily, are always “young for their age,” don’t get married or have romantic relationships, aren’t able to hold a regular job, never live apart from their families, and lead quiet, introverted, home-based lives. Should we look at those real people and think they all need to die? I don’t think so! Besides, it seems to me that the book actively refutes Beth’s self-deprecation. During both of her illnesses, it’s made clear how many people love her and how many people’s lives her quiet kindness has touched – not just her family and few close friends, but the neighbors, the Hummels (of course), the local tradespeople she interacts with, and the children she sews gifts for who write her letters of gratitude. Then there’s the last passage written from her viewpoint before her death, where she finds Jo’s poem that describes what a positive influence her memory will always be, and realizes that her short, quiet life hasn’t been the waste she thought it was. How anyone can read that passage and still come away viewing her life as meaningless is beyond me.

“She needs to die because she symbolizes a weak, outdated model of femininity.”

SparkNotes takes this interpretation of Beth and it annoys me to think of how many young readers that study guide has probably taught to view her this way. No matter how feisty and unconventional Louisa May Alcott was, and no mater how much she personally rebelled against passive, domestic femininity, would she really have portrayed her beloved sister Lizzie as “needing to die” because she was “too weak to survive in the modern world”? Would she really have turned Lizzie’s tragic death into a symbol of a toxic old archetype’s welcome death? But even if Beth were a purely fictional character and not based on the author’s sister, within the text she’s much too beloved and too positive an influence on everyone around her for this interpretation to feel right. This seems less like a valid reading of her character and more like wishful thinking on the part of some feminist scholars.

“She's a symbol of pure goodness who needs to die because she’s Too Good For This Sinful Earth™.”

Enough with the reasons why Beth “needs to die”! At least this one isn’t insulting. But I don’t think it’s really supported by the text either. If she were a symbol of goodness too pure for this world, then she wouldn’t forget to feed her pet bird for a week and lose him to starvation. She wouldn’t get snappish when she’s bored, even if she does only vent her frustration on her doll. She wouldn’t struggle with social anxiety, or dislike washing dishes, or be explicitly described as “not an angel” by the narrator because she can’t help but long for a better piano than the one she has. Now of course those flaws (except for accidentally letting her bird die) are minute compared to her sisters’. It’s fair to say that only “lip service” is paid to Beth’s humanity in an otherwise angelic portrayal. But it seems clear that Alcott did try to make her more human than other saintly, doomed young girls from the literature of her day: she’s certainly much more real than little Eva from Uncle Tom’s Cabin, for example.

“She’s destroyed by the oppressive model of femininity she adheres to.”

This argument holds that because Beth’s selfless care for others causes her illness, her story’s purpose is to condemn the expectation that women toil endlessly to serve others. But if Alcott meant to convey that message, I’d think she would have had Beth get sick by doing some unnecessary selfless deed. Helping a desperately poor, single immigrant mother take care of her sick children isn’t unnecessary. That’s not the kind of selflessness to file under “things feminists should rebel against.”

“She’s a symbol of ideal 19th century femininity, whom all three of her sisters – and implicitly all young female readers – are portrayed as needing to learn to be like.”

Whether people take this view positively (e.g. 19th and early 20th century parents who held up Beth as the model of sweet docility they wanted from their daughters) or negatively (e.g. feminists who can’t forgive Alcott for “remaking Jo in Beth’s image” by the end), I honestly think they’re misreading the book. I’ve already outlined the ways in which Beth struggles and grows just like her sisters do. If any character is portrayed as the ideal woman whom our young heroines all need to learn to be like, it’s not Beth, it’s Marmee. She combines aspects of all her daughters’ best selves (Meg and Beth’s nurturing, Jo’s strong will and Amy’s dignity) and she’s their chief source of wise advice and moral support. Yet none of her daughters become exactly like her either. They all maintain their distinct personalties, even as they grow. Admittedly, Beth’s sisters do sometimes put her on a pedestal as the person they should emulate – i.e. Amy during Beth’s first illness and Jo in the months directly after her death. But in both of those cases, their grief-inspired efforts are short-lived and they eventually go back to their natural boldness and ambitions. They just combine them with more of Beth’s kindness and unselfishness than before.

“She wills her own death.”

Of all these interpretations, this one is possibly the most blatantly contradicted by the text. Just because Beth’s fatal illness is vague and undefined beyond “she never recovered her strength after her scarlet fever” doesn’t mean it's caused by a lack of “will to live”; just because she interprets her lack of future plans or desire to leave home to mean that she’s “not meant to live long” doesn’t mean she’s so afraid to grow up that she wants to die. It’s made very clear that Beth wants to get well. Even though she tries to hide her deep depression from her family and face death willingly, she’s still distraught to have her happy life cut short.

I’ll admit that I’m probably biased, because as as a person on the autism spectrum who’s also struggled with social anxiety and led an introverted, home-based life, I personally relate to Beth. If I didn’t find her relatable, these interpretations would probably annoy me less. But I still think they’re based on a shallow overview of Beth’s character, combined with disdain for girls who don’t fit either the tomboyish “Jo” model or the sparkling “Amy” model of lively, outgoing young womanhood, rather than a close reading of the book.

[penguinlovestowrite]

I was wondering if you can do a Fred Weasley x my oc (Hannah) request, you can use y/n that ok! I’ll just use Hannah for explaining. So for backstory, Hannah is a half blood witch with her father being a Muggle and her mother a witch. She grew up most being raised like Muggles so she’s very into Muggle pop culture. She is also Canadian but goes to hogwarts due to a deal her mother has with Dumbledore. She was born In October meaning she’s a year below Fred and George, but she’s been close friends with them ever since first year. She’s also a slytherin. For my request I was thinking you could do something that takes place just after the battle of hogwarts (because it’s may 2nd) and maybe Fred survived and uh can do something with them celebrating their win and the war ending.

Thank you for requesting <3 This is quite a specific request. Also I will use (y/n) in this. I'm sorry that it takes quite some times but I have to say that I am really enjoying writing this. Also it was a bit long... I hope you love it!❤️

Us

Fred weasley x Fem!reader

Genre : Fluff and a bit of angst

Words : 2.3k

Summary : When (Y/n) save Fred from his death, (Y/n) was grateful that everything turns out well as she remember everything that had happened for the past few years.

Warning(s) : Mentioned of death, war, kissing.

Growing up as a half blood is not a bad thing as anyone else would have thought. (Y/n) being the half blood witch herself has always grown up in the more muggle way due to her father being a muggle and her mom being a witch. That was until she was 11 that she discovered the joy of being a half blood.

Due to her mother being a witch and a former students in Hogwarts. her mother had made a special arrangement with Dumbledore just for (Y/n) to attend Hogwarts. Being the only student who came from Canada and away from home, Hogwarts had always felt like home to her.

It was right after the battle and (Y/n) couldn't help but feel grateful for everything with Voldemort being gone for good this time and celebrating the win with the rest of her friends and people that she had called family.

walking into the great hall (y/n) were met with familiar faces. Especially the love of her life, Fred Weasley. She can't described how much grateful she was to see him smiling with his family while sharing laughs with his twin brother. Feeling nostalgic by the sight in front of her, it reminds her to their first meet.

Arriving at the king cross station on the first of September was something that was truly magical. From the moment (Y/n) stepped into the barrier to the moment she made her way to find an empty compartment.

Walking mindlessly to find an available compartment. (Y/n) walked into an available compartment only to find two identical redhead sitting facing each other while snickering along with another boy.

"Excuse me? Can I sit here? Everywhere else is full" she asked suddenly become aware of their attention towards her.

"I don't know...Can she, Georgie?" One of them asked who she assumed 'Georgie' while acting as if he was thinking.

"I'm not sure, Freddie" said 'Georgie' while smirking both of them held a glint of mischief in their eyes.

"I can go if I'm interrupting-" she started to feel embarrassed and tried to excuse herself when one of them cut her off.

"They were just joking, of course you can sit with us" said another boy but this time she can feel the sincerity in his voice while the twins just nodded as she sat besides one of the twins, each of them started to introduce themselves.

(Y/n) had learnt that all of them are in second year and the twin's name are Fred and George Weasley. Fred beside her and George in front of her meanwhile the other boy who sat besides George are Lee Jordan.

"So what's your name?" Fred asked her. She noticed his warm brown eyes and freckles littering on his face making her face feels hot.

"I'm (Y/N) (L/N). I'm from Canada" Their eyes turned wide at the mention of her origin.

"Canada? You must be the only student who came from Canada" Lee said with amazement laced in his voice.

(Y/n) just nodded and bring out one of her favourite muggle book to read. Fred noticed her book.

"What book is that?" He asked.

"Oh it's just a classic story that I love... It's called Pride and prejudice, it's really good."

She explained to him about the story as George and Lee talked to each other. After reading for a while, she decided to join their conversation until they arrived at Hogwarts.

Ever since then Fred, George, Lee and (Y/n) had become inseparable. Even though She was sorted into Slytherin, all of them still finds way to cause mischief together.

Along the way, (Y/n) could feel herself falling for the slightly older twin. Even though she and Fred had become best friend, it was not a secret to everyone that the two of them actually fancy each other. Well, not a secret to everyone but them.

Until one day on her fifth year, everything changed. It was a month before the Yule ball and there was a slight problem. She doesn't have a date. In fact, she thinks no one is even going to ask her to be their date. Considering she's a slytherin and a half blood it was quite hard. Although she was hoping for a certain red head to ask but she tried to not get her hopes up.

(Y/n) was walking to the great hall when a pair of arms wrapped around her, startling her when she realised the arms belongs to her most favourite Weasley.

"FRED! DON'T SCARE ME LIKE THAT!" she whisper yelled at him while glaring at him as he laughed at her flustered face.

"Actually...I wanted to ask you something" He told her as she stared into his warm brown eyes.

"What is it?"

"Actually..." He shifted his eyes nervously when suddenly he brought out a bouquet of flowers from behind him.

"I was wondering if you want to go to the ball with me? As a date? Or as a friend maybe?" A nervous smile on his lips. Fred rarely got nervous even when he was caught when doing pranks and was given a detention.

Slowly she took the bouquet with a smile adorning her face feeling a blush crept up her cheeks. she gave a kiss on his cheek.

"I hope that answers your question." (Y/n) winked, turning around to continue her journey to the great hall, leaving a speechless Fred alone on his own.

The night of the yule ball was the most amazing night (Y/n) ever experienced. The great hall was decorated nicely with snowflakes falling down but it didn't reach the floor.

As she walked down the stairs to meet her date. she saw how Fred gaped and she could feel he stares at her with so much care and adoration.

"You look gorgeous, love" He smiled. She could feel herself blushing at his compliments.

"You don't look bad yourself, Handsome" (Y/n) said smirking when he rolled his eyes.

" I did try my best."

That evening was filled laughter and chatter. Both of them dancing for the whole night, her arms around his neck and his arms around her waist. It was perfect. Staring into each others eyes, Fred starts to leaned his head forward, his eyes flickers to her lips for a second as she found herself slowly leaning in and without any second thoughts he crashed his lips to hers, lips moving in synchronization. The kiss felt natural, like it was meant to be.

Even though (Y/n) know people would be talking about her and Fred newfound relationship but (Y/n) couldn't care less about it, not when she finally got him. The kiss was filled with smiles and giggles, eventually breaking apart and starts laughing.

"I've been waiting to do that for a long time" Fred said with his eyes full with nothing but love.

From that night, marks the day where (Y/n) swore she will spend the rest of her life with him.

Four years have passed since that night. The wizarding world is no longer safe and things were getting worse day by day. (Y/n) are now staying with Molly and Ginny at the Burrow waiting for Fred to come home from his mission on saving Harry along with the rest of the order.

Three years earlier, (Y/n), Fred and George made their way out of Hogwarts dramatically when Umbridge terrorized Hogwarts. Deciding that it was for the best, she joined them. (Y/n) didn't regret her decisions, even when she got an earful from her mother. By the end of the year, the twins finally opened their shop and it was a success. She had moved in with Fred and George when they told her how much they want her to help them with the shop.

From outside of the house (Y/n) could hear Molly and Ginny's panic voice. That was when she saw Remus holding a bloodied George. Without wasting any time she rushed to help Molly when she saw George was missing an ear. The sight alone makes her panic as the thought of what will happened if Fred didn't survive. A few moments after that a popping sound could be heard outside of the Burrow alerting her someone has arrived. To her relieved, Fred and Arthur had arrived safely. Fred Immediately engulfing (Y/n) with a hug as she breath out of relieved.

Fred was devastated when he saw what had happened to his brother but not long until George made a feeble attempt to joke about his blown off ear. The air became thick when Bill announced Moody's death.

The day Bill and Fleur wedding finally came and (Y/n) were excited to say the least. despite being a slytherin and having no blood relation with the Weasley, they still treat as a family even more when she started to date Fred. (Y/n) have always thought of Bill as an older brother along with the rest of the Weasley siblings.

The morning of the wedding day (Y/n) woke up with an arm around her waist as Fred burried his face on the crook of her neck. Turning around she studied his face that was littered with freckles and how peaceful he looks.

"You know it's rude to stare." opening an eye he immediately smile at the sight of her face. How he love waking up with her beside him every morning.

" I'm just enjoying the view." (Y/n) said with sigh and snuggled closer to him as he pulls her closer towards him. The two of them enjoying the peaceful morning. Eventually, their peaceful moment come to an end when George barged into the room telling Fred to help putting up the tent. After several moments Fred reluctantly pulled away from her and decided to get ready for the day and help them with the tent leaving her alone in his room. Deciding that she was not going back to sleep (Y/n) started to get ready for the day.

The wedding was beautiful and (Y/n) were overjoyed by the sight of it but it doesn't last long. Something large and silver came falling through the canopy over the dance floor. Graceful and gleaming, the lynx landed lightly in the middle of astonished dancers. Then the patronus mouth opened wide and it spoke in the loud, deep, slow voice of Kingsley Shacklebot, allerting everyone about the fallen of the ministry.

It has been almost a year since Harry, Ron and Hermione went missing and (Y/n) along with the rest of the weasley went into hiding. That was when Fred walks in wrapping his arms around her waist.

"It's time"

those two words are what she feared most but knowing that the future of her world is at stakes, she's willing to sacrifice everything.

To say that the battle was terrifying was an understatement to say the least. (Y/n) had run and fighting for hours and she was beyond exhausted. Earlier she got separated from Fred and she was desperate to find him. That was when she find him fighting while joking with Percy.

"You're joking , Perce!" Fred shouted.

"You actually are joking, Perce... I don't think I've heard you joke since you were-"

(Y/n) could feel the ground shake and without wasting any time she pulled Fred to the side as the air exploded and the wall collapsed beside them, throwing them to the side, debris all over the air.

Fred grunted in pain as he opened his eyes to see (Y/n) on top of him. Unconscious. Panic started to rise in his chest as he pulled himself up and craddled her in his arms, shaking her while hoping for her to wake up.

"(Y/n)... Love please- wake up"

To his relieved she started to cough as she regained her consciousness. Fred quickly wrapped his arms around her tightly feeling grateful that she survived.

Percy made his way towards them, quickly helping them making their way to the great hall when suddenly Voldemort's voice could be heard commanding his armies to retreat and commanding Harry to gives himself up.

Percy and Fred with (Y/n) in his arms walk into the great hall as Molly quickly made their way towards them, engulfing them with hugs feeling relieved that both her son and (Y/n), her daughter as she claimed her to be was safe.

A few hours has passed and the sun has risen telling another day has arrived when Voldermort and his people arrived carrying dead Harry in his arms. He began to claimed and speech about putting faith on him when suddenly Harry leapt out of Hagrid's arms.

Everything happened so fast and the next thing (Y/n) know Voldermort had turned into dust and gone for good. Everyone was cheering and she was over the moon by the situation.

"(Y/n)!!!"

A familiar voice brought her out of her little memory. A voice she had grown to love. A voice that she would never be tired of hearing.

Fred makes his way to her quickly scooping her up into his arms as she let out a tiny squeal while he spin her around. A beautiful smile on his face even with a messy hair and a slight cut on his lips he manages to look handsome.

Setting her down, they share a long, passionate kiss telling how much they love each other.

"I am so going to marry you after this." Fred said between the kiss making (Y/n) laugh.

"I'll be waiting then..." she said with hope lacing in her voice.

"Just you wait, love"

"For as long as I live..."

With that they share yet another kiss before joining the rest of their family and friends.