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harrysfolklore · 4 months ago
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the bestest - lh44
summary: lewis hamilton wins the silverstone grand prix, and his daughter thinks he's the bestest. wc: 1.7k. based on this request
MASTERLIST | MY PATREON
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The British Grand Prix always carried a unique significance, but this year felt particularly momentous. Fans filled the stands, waving flags and banners, their cheers echoing through the circuit.
For Lewis, this year felt extra special because his wife and little girl were joining him, and that was enough to give him an extra boost of motivation for the upcoming race.
Alana Hamilton is just four years old, and she's the light of your lives. She's a curious child who always has a smile for everyone, her bright eyes constantly scanning her surroundings for new wonders to discover.
And she has her father completely wrapped around her tiny finger, everybody knew it.
Alana clung to your hand as you made your way to the paddock, her eyes wide with wonder at the spectacle around her. She had been to races before, but this time she was more aware of her surroundings and everything happening.
“Mommy, look at all the people!” Alana exclaimed, her eyes wide with wonder as she held your hand. “They’re all here for Daddy?”
“Yes, sweetheart, a lot of them are here to see Daddy race," you smiled at her, "He has a lot of fans who love to cheer him on."
“I’m going to cheer the loudest!”
Alana’s gaze followed every movement, her curiosity sparking with each new discovery. She was soaking it all in—the hustle of the team members, the hum of the engines, the vibrant colors of the team uniforms.
When you and Alana arrived at the team garage, Lewis was there, busy with pre-race preparations. He looked up, his face lighting up at the sight of his family.
“There’s my little girl,” he said, bending down to scoop Alana into his arms.
Alana giggled, her small arms wrapping around his neck. “Daddy, are you going to win today?” she asked, her voice full of hopeful excitement.
Lewis brushed a kiss on her forehead. “I’m going to give it my all, princess. With you cheering me on, I have a really good feeling about today.”
As Lewis held Alana, George Russell, his teammate, walked by and smiled warmly at the scene.
"Well, if it isn't the Hamiltons, my favorite family," he said, his tone friendly and genuine.
Alana's face lit up with recognition. She remembered George from previous encounters and team events. "George!" she exclaimed, waving enthusiastically from her perch in Lewis's arms.
"Hello there, little champion," George chuckled, giving Alana a gentle high-five. "Are you excited for the race today?"
"Yes! Daddy's going to win because he's the bestest driver in the whole wide world!" she declared with innocent confidence, looking at Lewis with adoring eyes.
Lewis couldn't help but beam with pride, though he tried to maintain a humble demeanor. "Well, I don't know about that, sweetheart. There are a lot of great drivers out here today."
"But you're the bestest, Daddy," Alana insisted, her conviction unshakeable.
George laughed good-naturedly. "Well, Lewis, looks like you've got your biggest fan right here. No pressure or anything," he teased.
You smiled, watching the interaction. It was heartwarming to see how the team had become like an extended family, especially for Alana.
"Alright, princess," Lewis said, giving Alana one more squeeze, "Daddy needs to finish getting ready for the race. You be good for Mommy, okay?"
Alana's grip tightened around Lewis's neck, her little face scrunching up in defiance. "No, Daddy, don’t go!"
“Sweetie, Daddy has to race now," you gently stroked her back, "We’ll be right here watching him the whole time.”
As Alana clung tighter to Lewis, her eyes welling up with tears, you could see the conflict on your husband's face. He hated leaving her upset, but the race was about to start.
"Hey, princess," Lewis said softly, gently prying her arms from around his neck. "Remember what we talked about? Daddy has to go fast in the car so he can come back to you even quicker."
Alana's lower lip trembled, but she nodded, reluctantly loosening her grip. "Okay, Daddy. Be fast and be safe."
"I will, princess. I promise," Lewis kissed her forehead tenderly.
He handed her to you, and Alana nestled into your arms, still watching Lewis with wide, admiring eyes. He turned to you next, his expression softening.
"I'll see you both soon. I love you."
You smiled, leaning in to kiss him. "Be safe out there."
With one last glance at his family, Lewis turned and headed towards his car, his determination renewed by the love and support he carried with him.
As you made your way to the VIP viewing area, Alana's eyes darted everywhere, taking in the sights and sounds of the bustling circuit. The roar of engines filled the air as the cars lined up on the grid.
"Look, baby," you pointed, "There's Daddy's car. Number 44, remember?"
Alana nodded eagerly, her eyes fixed on the sleek silver Mercedes. "Go, Daddy, go!" she shouted, even though the race hadn't started yet.
Throughout the race, you explained what was happening in simple terms Alana could understand. She cheered every time Lewis's car came into view, her enthusiasm making everyone around melt.
"Daddy's car is going so fast! He's the bestest!" Alana exclaimed, her eyes wide with wonder.
When the final lap came, the tension was palpable. You held Alana close, her little hands clutching your shirt as she watched Lewis take the lead. As he crossed the finish line first, the grandstands erupted in roars.
Alana’s eyes widened in amazement. “Mommy, did Daddy win?”
“He did, sweetheart!” you exclaimed, hugging her tightly. “Daddy won!”
"Daddy won! Daddy won!" she chanted, her voice filled with pure joy.
You couldn't help but laugh at her enthusiasm, your own heart swelling with pride. "Let's go see Daddy, shall we?" you suggested, taking her hand.
You hurried to the pit lane, eager to congratulate Lewis. As he climbed out of the car, the sight of you and Alana brought a huge smile to his face. He reached out, and Alana practically leapt into his arms.
“Daddy!” she shouted, hugging him tightly. “You did it!”
Lewis laughed, his eyes shining with happiness. “We did it, baby girl.”
Lewis held Alana with one arm and reached out to pull you into the embrace with the other. The three of you stood there, a little island of family amidst the chaos of the celebration.
"I'm so proud of you," you whispered to Lewis, giving him a quick kiss.
Alana, not wanting to be left out, planted a big kiss on Lewis's cheek. "Me too, Daddy! You're the bestest ever!"
As the celebrations continued around you, Lewis kept Alana in his arms, not wanting to let her go. She had always been clingy with him, especially since he was away a lot of weekends for races. She missed him a lot, and every moment they spent together was precious to her.
When it was time for the post-race interview, Lewis tried to set Alana down, but she clung to him, her small hands gripping his suit. “No, Daddy, hold me.”
“Come on, sweetheart, let Daddy do his interview,” you coaxed.
Lewis looked at you with a soft smile. "It's okay, I'll take her with me. I'll pay whatever fine the FIA gives me," he said, adjusting Alana in his arms. You couldn't help but chuckle, knowing how much this moment meant to both of them.
As Lewis approached the interview area, he saw a familiar face waiting for him - Nico Rosberg, his former teammate and rival. Nico's eyebrows raised slightly at the sight of Lewis carrying Alana, a small smile making its way to his face.
"Lewis, congratulations on your win today," Nico began, microphone in hand. "And I see you've brought a special guest with you."
Lewis grinned, bouncing Alana slightly in his arms. "Yeah, this is my daughter Alana. She's my good luck charm today."
"Hello there, Alana," Nico smiled warmly at her, "Did you enjoy watching your dad race today?"
Alana, suddenly shy in front of the camera, buried her face in Lewis' neck but peeked out with one eye. "Daddy is the bestest," she mumbled.
The crowd around them collectively "aww'ed" at her adorable response. Lewis chuckled, patting her back gently.
"Well, Lewis," Nico continued, "that was an incredible drive today. Can you talk us through that final lap?"
As Lewis answered, discussing the intricacies of the race, Alana stayed nestled in his arms, occasionally lifting her head to look around curiously and playing with the zipper of her father's suit.
When the interview concluded, it was time for the podium ceremony. Lewis knew he couldn't take Alana up there with him, no matter how much he wished he could.
"Alright, princess," he said softly, "Daddy has to go up on the big stage now. Can you stay with Mommy and watch?"
Alana's grip tightened, her lower lip trembling. "No, Daddy, I want to stay with you!"
You stepped forward, gently prying Alana from Lewis's arms. "Come on, sweetheart. Let's watch Daddy get his big trophy. We can wave to him from here."
Reluctantly, Alana allowed herself to be transferred to your arms, her eyes never leaving Lewis. As he walked towards the podium, he turned back to blow a kiss to both of you.
You found a good spot near the podium, holding Alana up so she could see clearly. Her eyes widened as she watched Lewis climb the steps to the top of the podium.
"Look, baby," you said, pointing. "There's Daddy on the top step. That means he won!"
Alana's face lit up with pride and excitement. "Daddy won! Daddy won!" she chanted, clapping her hands.
As the British national anthem played and Lewis stood tall on the podium, trophy in hand, Alana watched in awe. When Lewis spotted you two in the crowd, he gave a special wave and blew a kiss your way, making Alana squeal with delight.
"He sees us, Mommy!" she exclaimed, waving back furiously.
You hugged her close, your heart full of love for your little family. "Yes, he does, sweetheart. He's waving just for you."
As the champagne spray began, Alana giggled at the sight of her daddy getting all wet. It was a perfect end to a perfect day, one that you knew would be etched in your family's memories forever.
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daechwitatamic · 3 months ago
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cherrybomb || csc
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(banner by @sailorrhansol)
cherrybomb seungcheol x afab reader || angst smut fluff || exes2lovers, pacific rim universe NSFW - minors DNI
Summary: Piloting a jaeger requires a rare ability called drifting - a neural connection with your co-pilot. You and Seungcheol are masters of the drift... until you have something in your head that you don't want him to see.
wc: 19.5k
warnings: language, heavy angst with happy ending, fight scenes, fight scenes written by an author with zero fighting or martial arts knowledge lmfao thus they are vague as possible, feelings heavy plot light and smut light, kissing and pretty generic (and brief) p in v smut
Author's note: thank you for @sailorrhansol for 1) accidentally sparking this idea, 2) agreeing to collab with me, 3) reading this along the way and hyping me up, and 4) beta-ing my mistakes, a million smooches for you ily
This fic takes place in the Pacific Rim universe but I honestly don't think you need to know the lore, everything you need to know should be explained. If you think something is unclear without prior pacific rim knowledge, shoot me a message privately and I'll make some edits and credit you for the insight!
Also in this universe: storm breaker by @/sailorhansol
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Teaser:
“Marshall, with all due respect, I don’t know why you’re calling me,” you admit. “You were there. You saw what happened. Seungcheol and I can’t drift anymore.”
“You couldn’t then,” he points out. “That was three years ago. Things that were once too painful to carry into the drift… they’ve had time to mellow.”
He’s wrong, and you want to tell him so. Nothing has mellowed. You love Seungcheol just as much today as you did then.
“Have you talked to him about this?” You’re afraid of the answer. 
The Marshall’s voice hardens, and you can just picture his eyes narrowing. “Mr. Choi will follow orders,” he says evenly, “and so will you. Asking is really just a courtesy.”
“You can’t order us into being able to drift again,” you snap, pulse suddenly pounding in your arms, your hands, your face, your chest. 
“No,” the Marshall says, and any previous friendliness is gone from his voice now, “but I can - and will - order you to try.”
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Playlist: you're the smoke in my gun, blowin' like cherry bombs...
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The first time you ever saw Choi Seungcheol, he was flipping a man four years his senior over his shoulder and slamming him into the ground. Satisfied, he staggered backwards, chest heaving from exertion, eyes narrowed in preparation for the next move.
That’s what Seungcheol did - he leveled whatever was in front of him, and he started watching for what was coming next before the body could even hit the ground.
That’s what made him a great jaeger pilot. Not the brute strength - strong men are dime a dozen, always have been - but the watching.
You’d marked him as your first choice.
You were both nineteen. You’d grown up in the Shatterdome, the only child to a couple who piloted a neon green jaeger named Charron’s Revenge. You knew everything about how jaegers and their teams worked by the time you were nine. You started training to fight years before that. There was never a question that you would follow in your parents’ giant, mechanical footsteps one day. You just needed the right partner.
You needed Seungcheol.
The jaeger program didn’t turn away recruits - everyone could do something - but there was an organized process to match up compatible pilots. Applying recruits would fight before an audience of previously-accepted but currently-unmatched potential pilots. The pilots would rank the fighters, choosing their top five based on perceived potential for compatibility.
Then, the roles would switch. The applicants became the audience. The audience became the show.
When it was your turn to fight, you silently pleaded with the universe that Seungcheol would mark you high as well. This was the only guarantee that you’d get a chance to spar with him, to test it out before the Marshall, who would make the final call.
Let him see, you begged. Let him see how perfectly we’d work together.
And, by some miracle, he did. In fact, he rated you first, as well.
Your sparring match went exactly how you expected - he barreled at you, and you dodged every move. He could easily take you out with a single blow, but he couldn’t get his hands on you, not when you used his own inertia against him at every turn. What you didn’t expect was your own inability to land a shot. For the whole fight, you were unable to move out of the defensive - keeping out of his reach took all of your effort.
It was a draw - the first sign of strong compatibility.
You didn’t talk after the match - your father whisked you away to recover before your second-rated match, and you didn’t see Seungcheol for the rest of the day.
The second-rated match was a dud. But you already knew, even then, that it didn’t matter.
You’d met your co-pilot. You’d found your partner.
He found you in the mess hall that night, dropping into an empty spot on the other side of the table, his tray in his hands. His black hair was loose and wavy, and his right arm sported a sizeable bruise that he definitely didn’t get from you.
“I know who you are,” he said by way of greeting. You raised a brow at him, waiting. “Your parents piloted Charron’s Revenge.”
You narrowed your eyes at him. “That better not be why you picked me.”
He gave his head an annoyed little flick. “Of course not. I picked you because you’re fluid - and I’m not.”
Appeased, you felt your hackles settle back down. “That’s true,” you allowed. “You’re not fluid. But you’re purposeful, and-”
You were interrupted when Yoon Jeonghan dropped into the seat to your left, chuckling under his breath as he fixed his long, dark hair into a spiky ponytail at the back of his head.
“Cherry, did you hear?” he asked you, ignoring the new-comer. “The crew for Fatal Rapids got called back in for misconduct.”
“Choi Seungcheol, Yoon Jeonghan,” you said, introducing the two young men. “Hannie does more than gossip, I promise. He’s one of the pilots for Devil’s Advocates. Their drop stats are insane.”
“In practice only,” Jeonghan demurred. “For now.”
“Cherry?” Seungcheol parroted, raising a dark brow. “That’s not what I wrote on my paper earlier.”
“Just a nickname,” you explained. When you were very small, you’d struggled with the name of your parents’ jaeger, calling it Cherry’s Revenge instead of Charron’s, and the crew - who doted on you like their own - started the habit of calling you Cherry. Somehow, it had spread, and stuck. “Only my parents use my real name. But you can call me whatever you’re comfortable with.”
“No,” he said, frowning as if deeply considering his options. “I like it.”
You folded your arms on the table, leaning in to peer at Seungcheol. “So, what’s your story? You’ve heard of me. I haven’t heard of you.”
He shrugged, glanced around, then decided he could talk freely. There’s something about being in a room that’s positively teeming with people and conversation - it gives you privacy without feeling too intimate. You’re not alone.
“Not much of a story, not like you,” he admitted. “I grew up thinking I’d take over my dad’s business. We lost my dad… then, we lost the business. I have no marketable skillset, and university was out of the question. But…” He trailed off, then met your gaze firmly. Something in his look demanded you forgo any pity or sympathy, demanded you take him seriously. “I’m strong. So I came here. I came to fight.”
You sidestepped the bruises he’d bared. “Not like me,” you repeated with a bit of a scoff. “I hate to disappoint you, but my parents are the pilots - the story is theirs. I don’t have one, not yet.”
Something playful glinted in his eyes, the first true sign of personality you’d seen. “So all the rumors about the Princess of the Shatterdome aren’t true?”
Your jaw dropped. You’d heard the nickname before - it was never meant nicely. You tried to ignore it as best you could - people could think what they wanted. When you had a crew, when you had a jaeger, you’d be able to prove them wrong. “What rumors?”
“You’re spoiled,” Jeonghan supplied, having decided he was part of the conversation after all. “Entitled.”
You spluttered as Jeonghan stood, giving you a cheerful pat on the shoulder. “And bitchy! That’s just what I’ve heard. Of course I know better. Anyway, I’ve got to go. Love ya!”
You stared incredulously after him as he disappeared, your face burning with embarrassment and your heart hammering with adrenaline. Fight, your systems told you.
If only you could.
Seungcheol bit back a smile, reaching out to pat your arm placatingly.
“I don’t…” you started to say, but your voice caught in your throat. You cleared it, tried again. “I don’t think I really deserve all that.”
He nodded, lips pushed into a semblance of a thoughtful pout. “What I’d heard,” he said calmly, “is that you’re a hell of a fighter, scary smart, and that you take no shit. Unless it’s from your friends, apparently.”
This made a bitter little laugh bubble from you. You still simmered with humiliation, feared that maybe he’d decide he didn’t want to co-pilot with you after all.
“I think it’s up to you which story gets told,” he said finally.
“Yeah,” you said, nodding. “That’s what I always said. So… let’s get started.”
You and Seungcheol lucked out - the team that had been recalled for misconduct were terminated from their posts in the weeks following the sparring trials, and their jaeger Fatal Rapids had been disassembled, the parts up for grabs.
You and Seungcheol repurposed Rapids’s main frame, your crew working to individualize the bot to your needs as best they could. You splurged on quad-processors for her legs to allow your jaeger to keep up with how you move - quick and lithe. Seungcheol lobbied for (and won) some extra power in the top half, and you compromised and chose a mix of red and blue sections for her paintjob.
Duellona Fury, you named her. Duellona for you, the destroyer. Fury for Seungcheol, because that was where his fight came from.
You got to know Seungcheol’s fury very well. Especially when you started trying to drift.
None of it happened fast - not the building of your machine, nor your neural handshake. In fact, you didn’t pilot Duellona Fury together for a whole calendar year.
You started with physical compatibility - you sparred almost all day, every day. You fought - with each other and against each other - until all you could do was lay on the ground and pant, blinking to make the ceiling stay in focus.
Seungcheol may not have grown up training in the Shatterdome the way you did, but he kept up without complaint. You learned his way - force and strength - and he learned the way you favored - to weave and dodge.
The fighting was the easy part.
You had never drifted with someone you had true drift compatibility with. Seungcheol had never drifted at all. The Marshall wouldn’t even consider hooking the two of you up to the machine until you went through the proper training.
On the day you and Seungcheol were officially declared as co-pilots-in-training, you both stood below the half-built shell of your towering jaeger, sparks flying and drills screaming as the crew worked on her.
Your Marshall looked seriously at his new team-in-training. “Starting tomorrow, you’ll meditate together. Talk to each other. Get deep about it. If you’ve talked about it out here-” he swept an arm across the deck, “-it won’t take hold so strongly in there.” He’d jabbed a finger in the upward direction of Duellona Fury.
Seungcheol didn’t look at you, nor the Marshall. Instead, he kept his eyes on Duellona's unfinished frame, stories above you. “Yes, Sir,” he said steadily.
Your parents weren’t technically retired yet, the year you and Seungcheol started training together. Charron’s Revenge still sat in the well below the Shatterdome. They still lived on the base, still took part in daily training. They hadn’t been called into a fight in years, though; the assignments went to the younger crews.
You took dinner in their quarters instead of the mess hall, that night.
“Congratulations,” your father said warmly from across the table. “You worked hard to get here.”
“Thank you,” you said, feeling shy beneath the praise. “I hope the drift will work for me and Choi Seungcheol.”
“What do you think of him?” your mother had asked, her sharp eyes honing in on you, watching your reactions.
“I think he’s a great fighter,” you said. “The rest… I guess I’ll have to learn.”
“Do you trust him? Can you trust him out there, when the sea and the wind are trying to knock you down, and hell itself rises up from the depths?”
You swallowed. She’s right for her intensity - they will be putting their daughter’s life in her co-pilot’s hands, every time there’s a fight. You knew firsthand how terrifying it was to stand in the tech bay and wait, not knowing if your loved ones will make it back.
You thought about how you and Seungcheol fight together in the sparring rooms. You thought about how you weaved and your opponent followed your movement, only to be knocked sideways. You thought of how Seungcheol followed your motion backwards, ducked in tandem with you to avoid a hit, and how you followed his momentum forward and up to attack. Your bodies followed each other like they were magnetized. And Seungcheol was always watching for the next hit.
“Yes,” you said, so quietly that you cleared your throat and said it again. “Yes, I trust him.”
“Then we wish you luck,” your father said, and raised his glass. “To Duellona Fury.”
“To Duellona Fury,” you echoed.
On your way out of the quarters, later, you slowed as you passed the wall where they hung their accolades and awards, the newspaper clippings, photos, and medals. Before your eyes they aged - the photographs changing through the years, no longer showing a bright, fiery couple, instead displaying proof of passing time: a baby bump, then a toddler, then a child beaming alongside them as if she’d done what they had done; greying hairs, softening bodies, deepening of wrinkles. Then the pictures stopped.
You never asked them if they missed it.
You and Seungcheol started meditating together the next morning; it seemed logical to begin at the easiest step. In an empty sparring room, you sat facing each other, knees touching.
“Have you done this before?” you asked, as you both settled in, shifting weight and adjusting ankles.
“Not with someone else,” he admitted, lips protruding in a bit of a pout. “Only alone.”
You nodded. You’d grown up learning all of this - the right way to fight as a team member, how to be in tune for a neural connection. It led to you teaching Seungcheol often - yet when you fought together, any leadership fell away.
“Normally,” you explained, “you focus on your breath, keeping your mind clear. But for our practice, you want to focus on our breath. We breathe together. And when your mind wanders, your awareness should be coming to peace with my presence there. Like, making a path for the neural connection - for later. So there’s no resistance.”
“Have you done this before?” Seungcheol asked.
You wobbled your head around - not yes, but not no. “I’ve practiced it - I’ve done the meditation with partners. But I’ve never moved forward to an actual drift with anyone.”
This seemed to appease him, and he settled his weight backwards, letting his hands rest near his knees.
You let your eyes float closed and inhaled, listening and feeling for Seungcheol’s inhale to end, letting your breath out when he did. It took no time to match your breaths, to let your mind go blissfully quiet. You focused on feeling open, readable - any thought that floated through your mind, you pretended he could hear, too. You tried to feel and release any defensiveness, any urge to close off.
When the timer went off, it surprised you. You opened your eyes, and the feeling that struck you was this -
It was surprising to see Seungcheol before you. It hadn’t felt like he was beside you. It had felt like he was you.
You meditated, you fought, and finally, you talked.
Laying on the sparring room floor, your head somewhere near Seungcheol’s shins, he asked you, “Where do you wish you were right now? If you weren’t here.”
You laughed at yourself before answering, knowing how silly you would sound. “In a tree.”
A disbelieving smile played on his lips, almost as if he wasn’t sure you weren’t making fun of him somehow. “A tree?”
“No, really,” you insisted, still smiling a little. “There’s not a lot of nature here, in case you didn’t notice. I grew up in the Dome - never got to leave, much.”
Seungcheol didn’t respond to this, just nodded like he understood, his small smile going a bit tight around the edges.
You frowned, reading him exactly. “You think I’m sheltered,” you observed. It wasn’t a question. He couldn’t say no.
He looked at you, then. “You were sheltered,” he said, voice low. “But when I say it, I don’t mean naive. I just think… there’s a lot of world out there. A lot of things to see. You won’t see any of it if you spend your entire life under the Dome.”
You nod, accepting this. “I won’t see any of it if it gets destroyed, either. There’s a lot of world out there - that we’re trying to keep safe.”
Seungcheol watched you intently for a moment, lips downturned and gaze heavy. Then, he asked, “Have you ever seen a kaiju? I mean - in person?”
“Sort of,” you mumbled.
He’d rolled from his back to his front, closer to you, putting you shoulder to shoulder. “Kind of seems like a yes-or-no question.”
Your lips twisted. “Then, no. But I’ve stood in the bay and listened to Mission Control talk my mom and dad through a fight dozens of times, watched Charron’s Revenge on the screens and prayed I wouldn’t see her get sawed in half.”
You stopped, trailed a finger through the thin layer of dirt on the floor. “I know it’s not the same as looking one in the face myself,” you whispered. “But the fear… shouldn’t that fear count, shouldn’t it feel the same?”
Seungcheol swallowed, trailed his own finger through the dirt until his fingertip just barely touched yours. It felt like energy sizzled in the centimeter between your pointer and his.
“When Menaceclaw attacked,” he said, “he missed my home by one block. We watched him go by from the sidewalk. I wasn’t even as tall as his foot. But even with him towering over the buildings, taking them down without even trying, I don’t think what I felt was afraid. I think I just felt resigned. Like I knew, at seven, that even though we survived this one… nothing was going to be… the same, or okay. I don’t know.”
“You knew what you lost,” you said quietly. “Part of you did.”
He looked up at you, nudged his finger into yours. “You never knew anything different. It wasn’t a loss. The fear was just always part of the deal.”
You rolled sideways, laying your head on your bicep for a pillow, regarding the dark-eyed, dark-haired young man across from you. His face scrunched in a laugh, brows furrowing and lips pouting.
“What?” he asked through the quiet laugh. “Why are you looking at me?”
“What else?” you mused. “What else am I going to find when we go tiptoeing through your memories?”
He smiled faintly and then mirrored you, laying his head on his arm, his eyes swimming as he thought.
“A lot of my family, probably,” he said. “A lot of fighting. Menaceclaw. Probably some very mid sex.”
You laughed without meaning to. “My condolences?”
He grinned at you, pleased. “Eh, what can you do? I try to treat everything like a learning experience.”
You laughed again, and his smile grew, gums showing. “What about you?” he asked off-handedly.
“Mid sex?” you asked, eyebrows raising. “I hate to inform you, Choi Seungcheol, but I don’t do anything mid.”
“No,” he protested, laughing, reaching out to gently shake your shoulder. “I meant - what will we see when it’s your turn?”
“The Dome,” you said, half-joking - but it was true. “Training. My parents. Their fights, their accomplishments.”
And, as a true drift partner should, he understood what you weren’t saying.
“We’ll have our turn,” he promised, pushing himself to sit up, then stand, reaching down to help you up. “We’re gonna be fucking unstoppable. Let’s go again.”
Fire sparking behind your ribs, you nodded seriously, then reached up to take his hand.
Weeks of sparring melded into months of meditation and talking. The next phase of training co-pilots was learning to drift in one of the simulators - but not in a jaeger. Not yet.
You and Seungcheol finished training in one of the sparring rooms shortly before dinner would be served in the mess hall.
“Meet you there?” you asked, still half-breathless, your body starting to ache as the adrenaline from a fight melted away.
“Sure,” he agreed, and you disappeared into the changing rooms, scrubbing the sweat and dirt away as quickly as you could. You changed into something clean and made your way to the mess hall.
You scanned for familiar faces, frowning when your normal table seemed to be occupied by a team of new recruits that you didn’t know.
Seungcheol appeared at your elbow, frowning dramatically. “Our table,” he whined.
“There’s Chan and Wylie,” you said, nodding to another corner where your friends sat practically on top of each other. Chan and Wylie had never understood personal space, not when it came to one another. They barely noticed when you and Seungcheol plopped onto the benches next to them, but Seungkwan did.
“You’re bleeding, Cherry,” he said, before inhaling an entire mouthful of rice.
You started to scan your arms - you didn’t feel pain anywhere - but Seungcheol found it first, gingerly swiping his thumb along your cheekbone.
“Sorry, Cherry,” he murmured. “I should’ve pulled that punch.”
“No you shouldn’t have,” you grumbled, swatting at his hand and wiping roughly at the spot, your hand coming away with a small smear of red - nothing to be alarmed about. It would stop on its own. “You pull shots in practice, you’ll hesitate in the field.”
“She’s right,” Chan said from his physical tangle with Wylie. “What you practice will show up in your muscle memory. You’ve got to mean it, every time.”
Wylie reached across his arms and took a bite from his plate, then asked, “Did you guys see the new jaeger?”
“I did,” Seungkwan said eagerly. “Chaser Supernova, or something like that? She’s smaller, but she’s supposed to be fast.”
“Is that her team at our normal table?” you asked dryly, shooting the rookies a dark look over your shoulder. Seungcheol jostled you playfully, sending you a smile that brought you back.
The bench dipped to your left, and you turned to see Soonyoung - one of Seungkwan’s two co-pilots - settle in.
“Talking about Supernova?” he asked, hands busy opening his drink. “They seem okay - they’re a trio, like us.”
“Where is Seokmin?” Seungkwan asked, scanning the room. “I haven’t seen him in like two hours.”
“Talking to Jihoon, I think,” Soonyoung answered absently, focused on his meal. “He lost another co-pilot today.”
“Not again,” you and Seungcheol both blurted, matching levels of exasperation.
“That was freaky,” Wylie said, just as Chan told you, “You two are acting like us, now.”
“We do not need another Chan-and-Wylie,” Seungkwan said seriously, shaking his head.
Seungcheol sent you a sideways, sheepish grin.
“We won’t be,” he promised the group, but his eyes were still on you.
The simulators were built to be exact replicas of the conn-pod, so that trainees could get used to the feeling of being strapped in, of moving with the gear. But the real purpose was to practice the neural handshake without risking damage - to the jaeger, to the tech bay, to each other.
“Don’t be nervous,” you told Seungcheol as the tech team worked around you both like a choreographed dance.
“I’m never nervous,” he said, suddenly cocky.
If you could reach his hand from where you were strapped in, you would have. If you understood anything about Seungcheol - if any part of him mirrored you - it was the way he showcased bravado, the way he used it as his most-familiar mask.
“It’s only practice,” you reminded him. “And it’s only me.”
He licked his lips quickly, eyes darting to the side and then back to you. Then, he gave you a small nod.
“Normally,” your chief tech - a beautiful woman with jet-black hair named Nainsi - told you, “right now, you would be ready for the drop. In the simulator, we skip that step because we aren’t dropping onto a jaeger. Instead, we’ll engage the pilot to pilot connection protocol sequence.”
You and Seungcheol nod in tandem.
“You’re all good?” Nainsi checks. “Then I’m going back into the tech bay - you’ll hear me through the intercom.”
Alone in the simulator, you met Seungcheol’s gaze and couldn’t help the excited grin that spread across your face. Finally, finally you were here. Once you could do this successfully, the next step was to fight in your own jaeger - to drop into Duellona Fury and walk into the sea.
He didn’t return your smile, instead giving you a tight nod, expression serious.
Over the intercom, you said clearly, “Ready and aligned.”
Nainsi answered, “Prepare for neural handshake.”
You took a deep breath and steeled yourself as the artificial voice of the simulator’s tech system spoke around you, 3… 2… 1… neural handshake initiating…
At first, you thought something went wrong. Everything went red behind your eyelids, and you blinked, instinctively trying to clear it away.
The red faded, and you found yourself in Seungcheol’s childhood home. You didn’t know how you knew that - you just knew. It was as familiar to you, inside the drift, as your own. You knew that to your left was a small kitchen with two broken floor tiles; you knew - without having ever seen it - that to your right was a narrow hallway that led to a bathroom and two small bedrooms.
Two small boys played on the carpet; rather, the smaller one played with some toy cars while the other watched the television with rapture. Behind them, at the kitchen table, a woman typed busily on an outdated laptop, bags heavy under her eyes.
Somewhere around you, a voice floated by, telling you, neural handshake strong and holding.
You could see Seungcheol in your periphery - the adult Seungcheol, the Seungcheol of now - as he looked at his mother, his brother, himself.
“It’s not real,” you reminded him gently. “It’s just a memory.”
“I know,” he said back, voice hushed, as if he might scare them away. “It’s just… good to see them.”
The house evaporated as gently as morning dew under a mid-morning sun; you stood in a schoolyard. Seungcheol, the small one, had a bloody lip and a mean swing.
You felt a rush of affection for him - him, the child, face contorting with misplaced anger, using strength as a bandage. You wanted to stand in front of him, between him and the anger, him and the other kids, and let him take a breath. You wanted to tell him to step with his punch to get more power. You wanted to put a hand on his shoulder and tell him, you’re going to be fine.
And he knew all of it, because he was in your mind.
Seungcheol - your Seungcheol - walked away from the swarm of children egging on the fight and opened a door. You followed.
Inside was not the school, but a hospital room. Your body jolted forward, distracting and alarming. You heard, faintly, a series of beeps, that robotic voice needling in your ears, saying, calibration failure… recalibrating in 3… 2… 1…
“It’s only a memory,” you said again, but the warning beeps were coming stronger, louder, more clearly. The hospital room looked opaque, and Seungcheol walked backwards towards you, away from it, herding you both out of the room. The room - a bed, a pulled curtain, a lot of white - flickered, like a glitch, and then vanished, leaving you standing in the simulator.
Neural handshake disengaged…
“Seungcheol!” you yelled, pulling your helmet off and wheeling on him as best you could with most of your body still strapped in. “What the hell was that? You pushed me out!”
He was breathing hard, eyes a little wild. “Not that,” he said, a little ragged. “I’ll let you in but - not that.”
“You don’t get to choose!” you snapped. Part of you knew this was just growing pains, he’d never drifted before, he was learning. But the rest of you smarted and stung - both from his rejection and from your failure to train, to succeed, to check off this final step before you could get inside your jaeger. “It’s kind of an all-or-nothing thing!”
He let out a billow of air, reaching a hand up to rub at his face. “Sorry. I’ll… let’s try again.”
You didn’t answer, fuming silently instead.
“I’m sorry, Cherry,” he said. “The stuff with my dad…”
“You can’t cherry-pick what we see and what we don’t,” you fired back. His eyes shot to yours and his mouth quirked and you read the joke all over his face. “Don’t you laugh, Seungcheol, it’s not funny!”
But you were laughing through the scolding.
“Stop,” you whined.
Your anger defused, he looked at you again, taking a bracing breath. “It’s not about you,” he tried to explain. “I’m not keeping you out. I’m keeping me out.”
“Don’t chase the rabbit,” you told him, shaking your head. “See what it wants you to see and move on. Find the next door. If you stand there and let your hurt - or your, I don’t know… grief - rise up… that’s when we’re going to have trouble.”
“Find the next door,” he repeated, eyes on the floor. “Got it.”
“You can’t push it away,” you reminded him, “but you don’t have to stay in it, either.”
He nodded, eyes already lighting up, ready to go again.
The second time, you saw him steel himself before opening that same door, watching carefully as he shuffled inside, only looking sideways at the hospital room that materialized around you.
“Seungcheol.”
He turned to look at you, wide-eyed, but you hadn’t called him. The voice, weak and hoarse, had come from the other side of the fluttering curtain.
The glitching started almost immediately - the image around you flickering like a bad wall projection. Something rocked beneath your feet, an earthquake only inside your minds.
You opened your mouth, started to tell him, you don’t have to stay, to remind him that he could move forward. Instead, you heard yourself say, “I’m here.”
The tremors under your feet quivered to a stop. You watched with trepidation and Seungcheol closed his eyes and took a deep breath, releasing it slowly. Then, he held his hand out, waiting.
You slipped your hand into his, and then he turned and continued walking, ignoring his father’s memory calling out to him. The flickering stopped, the picture you were part of brightening again as you found the next door, stepped through, left his pain behind.
It got easier quickly. Seungcheol’s ability to press on, to maintain focus, strengthened.
The strolls through your mind went easier - you’d had years to practice maintaining focus, waiting until after to let the emotions hit you.
Seungcheol learned to be ready for you, after. He’d sit with you, silent, and breathe in tandem as you worked to let go, to release the images of Charron’s Revenge on the tech bay screen, the sounds of your parents’ frantic communication as they fought together, the fear crawling its way up your legs every time until someone in the bay said, “Charron’s Revenge, cleared to return.” The loneliness of being the only kid in the Dome, having no outlet except fighting. Everything that threatened your mind while you piloted, everything that you had to save for later - save for him.
You were both freshly turned twenty when you got green-lit to drive.
“Seungcheol!” you called across the mess hall, practically racing to your table. He turned, eyebrows raised, as you crossed the large room.
“We’re approved to drop!” you told him excitedly. It churned in you - finally, finally you could fight, you could prove what you could do, you could help. “We’re on the drop schedule for tomorrow!”
His grin was unfettered, unfiltered, just for you. He reached up a fist and you bumped it enthusiastically. You were too excited to eat, too excited to sleep. You tossed and turned, imagining experiencing a drop for the first time, imagining striding through the mighty sea like it was nothing, imagining staring down hell itself and bringing it to its knees.
You were still awake when you heard the alarms down the hall. Yours didn’t go off, because you weren’t on duty, weren’t approved to fight.
Down the hall, there was a flurry of commotion - shouting, rushing, people pushing past you as they pulled on boots and jackets.
“Cat-3 in the west bay,” someone shouted.
“Deploying Devil’s Advocate!”
You reached the tech bay, trying to stay out of the way but not unseen. When the Marshall strode by, you stepped sideways.
“Let us drop,” you said quickly, knowing time was precious. “It’ll be like practice. We can be back-up. We’ll hang back.”
“Absolutely not,” the Marshall said, already moving to work past you. “You’re not approved yet. We don’t need a liability right now.”
“We’re scheduled for tomorrow!” you protested, and then you felt a hand on your shoulder.
“We’ll get our turn,” Seungcheol told you quietly. Of course he’d come out, of course he found you.
You deflated. “It could have been us. We are hours from approval.”
He gave your shoulder a tiny shake. “We’ll get our turn,” he repeated. “Don’t make trouble.”
You glowered, but you knew he was right. “Fine,” you grumbled as Joshua and Jeonghan slinked past you in matching jackets and matching shit-eating grins. You stayed out of the way as they prepared to drop.
You stayed through the fight, listened to the control room buzz and chatter, until you heard, “Devil’s Advocate, cleared to return.”
Only then did you try to go back to sleep. Seungcheol gave your shoulder one more squeeze.
“Tomorrow,” he promised.
“Tomorrow,” you repeated.
Some people feel God at church. The history of tradition and the sanctity of ritual speak to them, help them feel part of something, help them feel that unnameable swell of something spiritual.
Some people feel God in nature. The patterns of the universe, the way math exists without human touch, the harmonies and patterns that seem too intricate for coincidence help them believe in a planner’s touch. The beauty of the outdoors allows them to wonder, to feel like they belong as a piece of this clockwork.
But you - you felt God when you stood before your jaeger, marveling at the power, the beauty, how it feels like yours, how it feels like Seungcheol before you’re even inside it. Duellona Fury promises you power, promises you purpose.
That hand was on your shoulder again, and it slid down to the center of your back before removing itself.
Beside you, Seungcheol stared up at your glorious machine.
“She looks sick,” he said, the grin taking over his face.
“I can’t wait to fuck shit up,” you murmured, your reverent tone at odds with the flippancy of your words.
“Ready?” the Marshall asked you, coming up to your left. “We’ll get you calibrated and dropped, and then you’ll do a lap of the bay. We’re sending out Pretty Savage just in case you run into trouble.”
The defensiveness rose in you quick, like a snakebite.
“We don’t need a babysitter,” Seungcheol said, voice hard. You reached for his hand and gave it a squeeze - a reminder to watch it, just as his hand on your shoulder frequently did for you.
“It’s just safety protocol.” The Marshall was unphased by the outburst. “Have fun, you two. Enjoy your first joy-ride.”
You screamed when you dropped, the exhilaration rushing out of you as Duellona Fury fell story after story before slowing and attaching to your jaeger’s mainframe.
Goosebumps raised along your arms when the Shatterdome’s sea-doors slid open, shudders traveling your body as you and Seungcheol stepped together, Duellona Fury stepping with you, her gigantic, metal form following every movement.
For the first time in your whole, careful life, you felt powerful. Your jaeger cut through the ocean waves like they were nothing, making an easy perimeter of the bay. In your head, you could somehow both hear and feel Seungcheol’s delight, his low-simmering desire to fight, to do something a perfect mirror of your own.
“How is it?” Soonyoung���s voice crackled in your ears, reminding you that Pretty Savage wasn’t far behind you.
“Incredible,” Seungcheol answered him, at the same time that you said, “It’s everything.”
It didn’t matter that you came from a family of pilots. It didn’t matter that you were raised in the Dome, training since you were young. None of that mattered. You were born for this - born to fight for your planet, born for Duellona Fury, born for Choi Seungcheol.
The west bay became Duellona’s playground; you and Seungcheol were often assigned to patrol there.
It was only a few months in that you faced a kaiju for the first time.
“Come in, Duellona Fury,” Nainsi’s voice came through. “We have a reading just a few miles north of you. Cat-2. Approaching at -”
Duellona Fury was turning due north before the command was even given.
“Are you ready for this?” you shouted to Seungcheol as Duellona slid through the water, the adrenaline singing in your system already.
“You know I am,” he answered, something hard in it, and the thrill in your stomach sparked.
When the sea split in half, the kaiju rising from the depths with an unearthly roar, you sank into a defensive stance, feeling Seungcheol move beside you, doing the same.
“Let’s fucking go,” Seungcheol said darkly, and launched forward, your arms rearing back for momentum before the first swing. The punch landed solidly, your whole body shaking once as the kaiju faltered backwards a few steps.
It opened its mouth and you glimpsed three rows of teeth bigger than a cow before it was lunging at you; Duellona Fury lurched. You tried to duck sideways as Seungcheol tried to move towards your opponent.
The moment of indecision cost you - the kaiju got its teeth on Duellona’s shoulder, knocking you back several steps. Beside you, Seungcheol roared as sparks flew near the bite.
“Are we breached?” you yelled, trying to steady your balance again.
“Not yet!” he yelled back, and you swung again, a hit landing hard enough to knock the kaiju loose, spitting it back into the sea.
You tried to move into a defensive crouch again; again, the jaeger faltered.
“Cherry!” Seungcheol yelled, desperation laced in his voice. “Cherry, don’t fight me!”
“Move with me!” you answered, and he did, miraculously, Duellona dodging left before an incoming attack.
Don’t fight me.
You rocked forward with Seungcheol as soon as you were clear of the kaiju’s trajectory, just as you’d done in practice thousands of times. Back in sync, Duellona Fury landed a kick to the kaiju’s middle that sent it stumbling.
“We’ve got him,” you said, feeling a win.
“Don’t get ahead of yourself,” Seungcheol warned you. No sooner were the words out of his mouth than the kaiju exploded from the dark ocean, limbs flailing as it flew towards you.
Duellona’s arms came up and locked it in battle, the impact shaking you so hard that your teeth chattered against each other. You groaned with exertion as you tried to match its strength.
“I don’t think we can hold it,” you managed through grit teeth.
“We’ve got this,” your partner promised, and with a mighty shove, you managed to flip the beast over your shoulder and beneath the waves.
“Drop the bombs and head for the east side,” you said quickly, already moving. Duellona Fury followed your command, turning and starting an easy run through the bay’s churning waters, away from where the kaiju was struggling to its feet, furious and vengeful. As she ran, she dropped three small explosives, about sixty feet apart. The explosives slipped into the ocean depths.
“Ready?” Seungcheol asked, a little breathless. “Are we far enough away?”
“Light him up,” you replied. Seungcheol reached up and tapped the button; somewhere behind you, the ocean exploded.
“How’s your shoulder?” you asked, later, in the med bay.
“Not that bad,” Seungcheol said, but you could see the blood-stains on the bandaging.
“It won’t happen again,” you promised. “I think I just… practiced alone for so long. I forgot to listen. I’m sorry.”
Seungcheol shook his hand, eyes finding yours. “There’s nothing to forgive, Cherry. Forget about it.” Then, he brightened. “You know what I want to do?”
“What?” you asked, not entirely past feeling guilty.
His smile was devilish. “I want to go celebrate our first fucking kill.”
– 
You marked the passing of two years in statistics.
Three hundred and forty-six explosives detonated.
Two hundred and eighty-three drops. Two hundred and eight-three kills. 
Seventy-two mainframe repairs.
Twenty-eight achievement awards.
Nine television interviews.
Six upgrades.
One ill-informed “vacation” during which you both itched with anxiety, spending the whole time messaging your friends back in the Shatterdome desperately, praying you wouldn’t miss a fight in which you were needed.
Seven hundred and thirty days of living in and around Seungcheol’s mind and heart. But that stat should’ve gone first.
It was a good high. Your team had a good run.
It wasn’t a kaiju that reduced it to ash, not an attack that took your team out of the rotation of main fighters and sent your jaeger to gather rust and dust below the Dome. It was your own stupid heart.
There were a lot of moments that could have been it. Each time you walked into a fight knowing the danger, each time he ended up in the med bay reeking of antibacterial ointment and resentment. Each time you slid into your place beside him - space he saved only for you. Each time his voice bidding you goodnight from the bottom bunk was the last thing you heard at the end of the day. Any of these moments might have been the one to make you stop, gasp, suddenly slammed with understanding. That you loved him, that he was everything you couldn’t bear to be without, that he was part of you. But they weren’t.
There was no moment of realization at all.
Instead, it slowly seeped into your consciousness, as gently and naturally as morning dew collecting on pre-dawn petals. The knowledge clung to you, as impossible to ignore as damp feet after running barefoot through the yard just after sunrise.
If you knew something, that meant your co-pilot would know it, too.
Unless you tucked it away, pushed it down deep and cast his attention elsewhere, a mental sleight-of-hand. Look here instead. 
You were twenty-three, on a routine patrol, when Mission Control radioed Duellona that there was a reading in the bay.
“Looks like it’s only a Cat-1,” Mission Control told you.
“On it,” you told them, feeling your body already mirroring Seungcheol’s as Duellona picked up her pace, striding through the waves. 
You glanced sideways at him, and immediately wished you hadn’t. He was already zoned in, eyes focused and jaw sharp as he concentrated. 
He caught your gaze for only a second. “Focus, Cherry,” he cautioned. “Don’t get cocky.”
“I would never,” you retorted, and he laughed. You were both cocky; you both knew it.
For a second, things felt better. 
The fight was almost easy, when the ocean seemed to split in two and the waves fell away like wrapping paper to reveal the kaiju you’d been sent for. 
You swung and ducked, dropping explosives strategically, Seungcheol moving in unison with you. There was something graceful about it - something beautiful in the sync, something holy in the way your muscles mimicked each other’s. 
This is what happens when sunlight hits morning dew: it warms, lifts, makes the air humid and sticky until it burns away. 
It rose up in you, your love for him, infusing the air around you, infusing the neural handshake that he was deeply imbedded in.
No. 
You panicked, tried to do several things at once - tried to shove the feeling down, tried to think of something else, tried to push Seungcheol’s consciousness out of yours.
Duellona Fury lurched around you, shuddering. 
“Cherry!” Seungcheol screamed to your left, and then the kaiju hit, its full weight slamming into Duellona’s mainframe.
You both staggered, trying to right yourselves, as the machines around you blinked and beeped and rebooted. 
Seungcheol grunted under the neural weight of driving alone as you gasped and closed your eyes, trying desperately to fix it. Around you, you heard the floating words - recalibrating.
“Recalibrate faster!” you shouted, glancing sideways to see your co-pilot struggling to hold the monster in place, his face contorting with effort, arms straining against the machinery. He bared his gritted teeth, exhaling in a hiss between them. 
You gave yourself a shake, bouncing on the balls of your feet, desperate for the connection to take again so you could pick up your half, take the literal weight from him. As soon as you felt the neural handshake, you gave a mighty shove and Duellona flipped the monster backwards, the ocean receding and then coming back to slam her shins, swallowing the monster whole.
You both sank into a defensive stance, ready for the beast to rise again.
“What was that?” Seungcheol demanded, later, as he sat in the med bay, waiting for his nosebleed to stop. The nosebleed you’d caused by letting him carry a neural load meant for two.
“I don’t know,” you lied, still panicked and desperate. 
“Bullshit,” Seungcheol countered, eyes narrowed. He reached up and pulled the cotton away from his face, examining it. “I’m fine now,” he announced, and tossed the wad into a nearby trash bin, standing.
You fought the urge to cower, knowing he’d never let it go if you did. You followed him silently out of the med bay and back towards your dormitories. Halfway there, he slowed, then stopped.
Then, more calmly this time, he asked, “What happened, Cherry? You pushed me out.”
There was a slight pout to it, a sliver of hurt, and it sliced through you like something tangible, like you were actually wounded from it, like it might actually bleed.
“I don’t know,” you repeated. Guilt poked at you until you relented, gave him something that was at least partly true.  “I got scared.” 
“That can’t happen, and you know it,” he said seriously, his large frame casting a long shadow to your left as he leaned into your space. “You can’t keep secrets - that’s piloting 101. We’ve got to handle it. You know what’s at stake here.”
You did; you did, and that was entirely the problem. It wasn’t just feelings, it wasn’t just your relationship with Seungcheol at stake. It was your relationship with your co-pilot - your ability to fight was at stake, your ability to keep others safe. Your legacy.
Your parents’ wall of pictures flashed in your mind.
“I’m going to my mom and dad’s for a while,” you said quietly. 
He nodded, let you run away - trusted you to come back to him when you were ready, trusted you to let him in.
You weren’t sure if he was right or wrong, as you walked away and left him behind.
You didn’t go to your parents’, though. Instead, you went to the tech bay and sat, watching Duellona undergo simple repairs from her fight. You stayed there, the metal cold beneath your thighs, watching the tech team buff over a scratch on your jaeger’s torso, until someone dropped into the spot next to you, bumping their shoulder roughly into yours.
“Where’s Seungcheol?” Wylie, who co-piloted Fury Striker with Chan, was your closest friend in the Dome besides Seungcheol. 
“He’s pissed at me,” you answered, looking sideways, because the question had really meant, why isn’t Seungcheol with you? 
You weren’t sure she’d understand what you were going through - she and Chan had been obsessed with each other since they were kids. Neither of them had ever had to fear that their love for each other would mess anything up. It had been part of their deal from the start.
“What’d you do?” Wylie demanded, turning her full, unfettered attention on you. You wanted to shrink from the intensity of it - but that was always how Wylie worked: full wattage, all the time.
“Almost got us killed by a fucking Cat-1 tonight,” you muttered, angry at yourself, angry at your heart.
Wylie smacked your arm hard enough to send you sideways. “Cherry!” she scolded. 
“There was something I didn’t want him to see.” You said it in your head first, weighed the words, then forced them through your teeth. You hoped she’d just know what it was, hoped you wouldn’t have to force those words past muscle and bone, too.
Wylie’s face dropped into irritation. “Cherry,” she repeated, disappointment dripping from the two syllables.
You looked up at Duellona Fury again. 
“You can’t do that,” she told you, giving your ankle a little kick for emphasis. “You know you can’t do that.”
You can’t love him? Or, you can’t keep secrets from him?
You didn’t ask. You didn’t want to know the answer.
Seungcheol was waiting up for you when you finally returned to the dorm. You opened the door to find the first room - an entryway and kitchen, both - dimly lit. Beyond it, in the small sitting space, Seungcheol sat facing the door, his chin in his hand.
You knew the look on his face. You knew it so well that you almost ran from it, almost turned right around and went back out to the hallway.
Brows slightly furrowed, mouth a straight line, jaw tight. Eyes focused, locked in. It was the face he made in training before he bodied someone. It was the face he made in the field before an offensive strike. It meant he had his sights on a target, a problem, and he was about to throw everything he had at it.
And right now, you were the problem.
“Hey?” you tried meekly.
He nodded. Licked his lips. Stood. 
He’s pissed at me, you’d told Wylie. The energy radiating from your co-pilot was much more complex than that, the air around you palpably tense and teetering.
“How was it at your parents’?” he asked, voice low. 
You took one tentative step closer. “I didn’t go,” you admitted. One lie between you was already more than you wanted. “I watched them patch up Duellona instead. Talked to Wylie a little.”
He nodded, eyes still on you. Nervousness coursed through you, but it would be a lie - another one - to say it wasn’t laced with a little excitement. He was stunning, always, but like this - it almost took your breath away.
If he was in your mind right now, there’d be no question. He’d know all of it. The attraction, the desire, the fear, the affection, the love, the need. All of it. 
His eyes caught on a bruise peeking out from the short sleeve of your top. “You should’ve had them look at that,” he said, reaching out like he wanted to run his fingers over the dark splotch, but he was just too far away, fingertips closing around the air just an inch or two away. 
You shook your head. “You needed attention first. You carried the neural load alone.” Because of me.
“Only for a minute.”
“A minute too long. I’m… I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to.”
It hung between you. You don’t know if you’d inched forward or he had, or both, but you were close enough to touch now when you hadn’t been just seconds ago.
He lifted his eyes, his gaze locking on yours. In the dim room, his eyes shone black. “You pushed me out.”
It was an accusation, but it was also a question.
“I’m sorry,” you repeated, barely able to say it, your voice coming out in a hoarse whisper. “Seungcheol, I was scared.”
Maybe he was in your head. Maybe he did know all of it.
“Don’t be,” he told you. “Don’t be scared.”
His arms were around you though you didn’t see him move. It wasn’t the first time you’d let him embrace you - after a fight, in relief, or in victorious delight, or sometimes just in sleepy affection at the end of a long day. It was far from the first time that you’d found comfort in the space between his arms, strong and capable around your frame, your forehead pressed against his sternum as his heart beat directly into your bones. 
But it was the first time that his fingers, confident and sure, tipped under your chin, guiding you to look up at him, guiding your mouth to meet his.
You don’t know if you melted or exploded - it was somehow both at once. You gripped his back, feeling the muscles move beneath his t-shirt, relaxing into his hold and focusing on the feel of his full lips firm and hungry against your own. This was everything - everything you’d wanted, everything you were afraid of, everything you needed, everything that could rip your life apart.
You didn’t mean to whine, but it slipped up your throat and into the gasped space between your lips and his as you tried to pull in a desperate breath. He responded with a grunt, walking you backwards until the edge of the kitchen counter jutted into your lower back. His hands traveled, up to the back of your neck, back down to the slight curve of your waist, around to the back of your ass. He tugged your hips against his roughly, and you let your head fall back, panting, head spinning.
“Cherry,” he breathed against the newly bared stretch of your neck, his lips close enough to drag against your skin as he spoke.
Your hands found the back of his neck, gave the slightest tug upwards, and he followed, bringing his mouth back to yours. His tongue pressed yours briefly, your moan muffled entirely by his mouth as you tried to press him closer, closer, as if you wanted your rib-cages to meld, to slip together like fitting puzzle pieces. 
His hand slipped lower from your ass and wrapped around your thighs, taking only a second to lift you onto the counter behind you. You wrapped yourself around him immediately, pulling him into the space between your legs, arms around his neck, pulling him in, wanting to feel every bit of him against you. 
His hands found the hem of your shirt and lifted; you raised your arms in compliance and felt the cotton slip over your head and your hands.
“Yours,” you murmured, but he had already reached back between his shoulder blades, his own top joining yours on the floor.
Your hands found him on their own, sliding over his skin, fingers dipping between muscles, thumbs sweeping over shadows.
You kissed until you turned liquid, molten, your fingers wrapped in his hair. His fingers mapped every inch of your skin, as if his job was to report back on every previously unknown dip, every rough circle, every beauty mark or blemish. His fingers traced them all, his hands passing over you reverently.
The brush of his bare chest against your own was torturous; delicious until you were full, until you couldn’t take it anymore, until the electric-sharp thrill became uncomfortable. You tilted backwards, creating more space between your torsos but pushing your hips firmly into his.
You both groaned at the contact. You could feel the heat and weight of him now, and everything instinctual within you urged you to shift further, to bring that heat and heaviness closer to the part of you that ached for it. 
He pressed his hips into you without reservation, your core clenching in response to the movement and the friction. 
Then he leaned back, his hands gripping the edge of the counter, his arms bracketing you on either side, his chest heaving as he struggled to control his breathing. He drank you in, his eyes as molten as you felt. You leaned back on your elbows and met his gaze.
The moment expanded; nothing existed but his eyes and the pant of his breath and the way he smelled like he’d just finished a fight and the way he felt between your thighs, unmovable and steady.
Neither of you was connected to jaeger machinery, but you may as well have been, because you knew without a shadow of a doubt that your minds were connected, the drift be damned. Your eyes locked, you knew he felt everything you felt - the gravity of what you were doing, the love that drove you, the fire coursing through you. If there was going to be hesitation or questioning, this was the moment, this was the pause. But you were one, your minds were one, and there was none of that. 
His unvoiced question definitively answered by the certainty that flowed between you, Seungcheol moved to lift you again, taking you easily from the countertop into the dark of the room you share, settling you on your back on his bottom bunk.
Above you, mostly shadowed, was your other half, the only person who knew and understood every cobwebbed corner of your consciousness, the only person who had walked through your mind and found himself mirrored in every way that mattered. He was beautiful in the fractured light, his expression serious and gaze intense. 
You reached up to slide your thumb along his jaw and his eyes fluttered closed, his breath leaving him as in relief, as if you’d made some kind of admission. 
Making love to Seungcheol felt like drifting. His eyes on you as his fingers pulled you apart felt the same as the careful way he’d watch you when your memories got emotional, like he was watching for any sign that you weren’t okay, that you needed more or less or him. 
The way his breath and shoulders shuddered when he pressed into you for the first time felt the same as when he faltered in face of his father’s memory; both times, his fingers laced through yours and held tight until you could both breathe again.
He felt how you’d always known he would. Perfect - a perfect fit for you, a physical compatibility you had never tested but had always trusted would be there. He took you apart without even trying, and all you could do was hold onto him, feel all of him, feel all of it, and try to remember to breathe.
You didn’t speak as you moved together in the dark; the only sounds in the tight room were muted gasps, tiny moans muffled against necks, skin on skin, the obscene squelching sounds that accompanied each snap of his hips. You didn’t say the words that your lips tried to form - it’s so much, go slow for a little, Seungcheol, I love you, more - please, don’t stop. Maybe he heard them. Maybe this was a different way to drift, one that didn’t need wires.
You did your best to hold his gaze, losing sight of him only when you strained up to kiss him, when you nuzzled your face into the warmth between his neck and shoulder and gasped against a wave of sensation, when you couldn’t help but close them as they rolled back, your toes curling. 
He pressed his forehead to yours when he finished, your name slipping out of him, as if it had been literally squeezed from his lungs. “Cherry… Cherry…”
You lay together in silence for a long time, feeling your hearts slow, your skin cool. Your thumb traced his jaw again and again, slow, worshipful. “Cheol,” you whispered. My Cheol. My everything. You didn’t say the rest as you lay together in the quiet, in the dark, your heartbeats competing. 
You didn’t know that you’d drifted together for the last time. You didn’t know that your ability to neural connect could be broken.
The wind whips around you, stinging your face. You barely flinch. When you’d first relocated here, three years ago, the cold had made you literally cry during your first month. Just from having to walk from the door of the dormitory across the yard to the mess hall dorm, the intensity of it had sent you spiraling into misery - damning the circumstances that had sent you here, away from everyone and everything you knew and loved, to a place where the air hurt. 
You were sure it would hurt, this intensely, forever.
But time eased the sting, and despite your doubts you did adjust. Now the early morning wind feels bracing and refreshing rather than painful. You’ve adjusted to a lot of things since relocating to a small training center in Alakanuk, Alaska: the climate, the food, the no-frills campus you lived and worked on. Being away from your parents, from Wylie and Chan and Seungkwan and Jeonghan and all the other pilots you were friends with at the Shatterdome.
Being away from Seungcheol. Being partnerless, a half instead of a whole. 
Being unable to pilot, unable to fight. 
Being brokenhearted.
Just like the cold, the pain of your losses was the same - the sting of heartbreak and loneliness and homesickness faded to something ignorable, something you could keep tucked tight in the back of your mind. 
You can hear the noise from inside the mess hall before you even cross the courtyard. There are short of fifty girls ranging from ages seven to eighteen being housed here, but from the noise you’d swear it was at least a hundred. 
The buildings are single-storied, painted with a heavily-chipping grey-blue that sometimes seems to belong to the mist you often get rolling in from the ocean. When you’d first come, you’d legitimately thought they were painted that way as camouflage, meant to blend in with the sea. The other trainers had a good laugh about that. 
As you cross the courtyard between the trainers’ dorms and the mess hall, you breathe deeply, eyes on the birds alight above you. After a lifetime in the Shatterdome, you don’t take for granted the fresh air you’re afforded as you pass between buildings, outside, the sky open and changing above. You don’t take for granted the rhythm of the ocean, the cries of the gulls, nor the distant treeline.
It was Seungcheol who had noted that you were sheltered, having never lived outside of the Dome. 
It was Seungcheol you could blame - at least halfway - for your relocation here, where there wasn’t a jaeger or even a city for hundreds of miles. 
When you pull open the flimsy door to the mess hall, the noise triples. Several of the girls call out to greet you, and you give them a quick wave as you head to the table where the staff eats.
“You’re later than normal,” one of the other instructors notes as you reach for a piece of bread.
You shrug lightly, unbothered. “Still have plenty of time before the first class. What day is today, Thursday? I’ve got the little ones first, right?”
The all-girls training center is meant to teach fighting and the groundworks for drifting, but no jaegers are housed here, no teams launch into the icy bay. The girls here will grow up to pilot - if they get selected, if they get paired with a partner. 
You’re mostly here to teach them to fight, the way you trained in the Dome, but you do plenty more. Help brush hair in the mornings, console tearful faces, teach games and sports, mediate arguments. You also got sucked into running one literacy class a week, though you still haven’t figured out how that happened. 
It would be a lie to say this wasn’t fulfilling, that you didn’t love the girls you cared for, that you weren’t happy here with the ocean and birds and trees and laughter. In many ways, the seclusion of this training center is exactly what you needed to get back on your feet, to find strength in yourself, to heal with distance and time.
But, god, what you would give for a real fight. What you would give to feel both loved and threatened by Wylie, to rib at the guys, to hug your mom. What you would give to hear Seungcheol’s teasing pout, to catch his gaze across the span of your jaeger and know what his body and yours will do, to feel his fingers just barely graze your back when he knows you need to be reminded to focus.
The final time you’d tried, the neural connection never took. It was like trying to connect with a stranger. It had simply been still, a thing that was never alive.
“Don’t do this,” Seungcheol had begged, and that had been the nail in the coffin.
Don’t do this, he’d said. It had landed like blame. Like everything was your fault, and only yours. Like you had broken the connection on purpose, were keeping him out, barricading your mind from his when you desperately wanted everything to go right back to normal.
After that failure, you didn’t tell him you were asking to be reassigned. You didn’t want to give him the chance to say don’t do this a second time.
You’ve just ended a class, the girls starting to filter out through the training room’s side door towards the mess hall for lunch, when the center’s Administrator calls your name from the door.
“There’s a call for you on my line. I have them holding.”
A call? 
Adrenaline races through you; it has to be an emergency. Your parents and friends can reach you on your own device, which is tucked into your back pocket. To call the mainline here at the center means this is a base-to-base call, not a personal one.
You’ve only been in this office a handful of times in your few years here, and you shuffle awkwardly around the desk and pick up the receiver that sits abandoned on the chipped, wooden desktop. 
You greet the person on the line with your real name. 
“Cherry?”
Your Marshall - your old Marshall, from the Dome - sounds unsure if he has the right person on the line. No one has called you Cherry in three years. Even your parents have used your given name the few times they’ve said it on your weekly calls home.
“It’s me,” you affirm. “Is everything okay? My parents?”
“I didn’t mean to scare you,” he says, and you heave a relieved breath. “Everyone is fine. This is official business. I want to call you in.”
You shake your head, frowning, well aware that he can’t see your reaction. Your body has said no, but you force yourself to ask, “Me? Why?”
“We’re down a few teams,” the Marshall says. “And -”
“You’ve got more recruits than places to put them,” you counter before he can finish. “Call one of the new teams up. Call three new teams up. You don’t need me.”
“We do - we need teams with experience, teams that are ready. Not rookies bumbling around looking for mistakes. We need precision. We need Duellona Fury.”
Your Marshall lays out the situation: the teams that are out, the problems they’re having at the breach - less time between attacks, more monsters at once. You’ve seen this before, you all have, and there’s protocol in place - protocol that starts with all hands on deck. 
You shake your head again. From the door, the Administrator of the center watches you seriously, like she knows you’re being taken away. 
“Marshall, with all due respect, I don’t know why you’re calling me,” you admit. “What can I give you? I can’t pilot Duellona.”
Not anymore. 
The Marshall sighs, like he knew this argument was coming and didn’t have a good response. 
“I think you can,” he says finally. “I’m not saying it will be easy, and I’m not saying it will happen quickly or without effort. But I think you can.”
“No,” you say, the first time you’ve voiced it. “You were there. You saw what happened. We can’t drift anymore.”
“You couldn’t then,” he points out. “That was three years ago. You’ve both had a lot of time to…. You’ve both had a lot of time since then. Things that were once too painful to carry into the drift… they’ve had time to mellow.”
This blow knocks you into silence. You sink your teeth into your bottom lip, eyes steadfastly on the warped wood of the desk, fingers toying absently with the Administrator’s pen. 
He’s wrong, and you want to tell him so. Nothing had mellowed. You love Seungcheol just as much today as you did three years ago. The splitting ache in your chest that you’ve felt every day since you became aware of loving him has only worked its way deeper with time. 
And Seungcheol’s anger? The anger and betrayal he’d leveled at you, when he was sure you were keeping him out of your head on purpose? You couldn’t speak for him, but if you had to guess, there weren’t enough years in a human life to let that hurt mellow into something safe enough to drift with.
“Have you talked to him about this?” You’re afraid of the answer. 
The Marshall hesitates. “Not yet.”
“You might want to do that first,” you point out. “Before flying me back only to have him refuse.” 
The Marshall’s voice hardens, and you can just picture his eyes narrowing. “Mr. Choi will follow orders,” he says evenly, “and so will you. Asking is really just a courtesy.”
“You can’t order us into being able to drift again,” you snap, pulse suddenly pounding in your arms, your hands, your face, your chest. 
“No,” the Marshall says, and any previous friendliness is gone from his voice now, “but I can - and will - order you to try.”
The girls cry when you tell them you’re leaving, and it makes you want to cry, too. You hold it together as you give them hugs, hold it together as you pack your single bag of belongings. You hold it together in the passenger seat of the center’s only beat-up van, waving out the back window as the training center fades away.
It’s standing on the deck of the ferry, the coast receding and the sea wind clawing at your face, that you let it go. You bury your face behind your hands and feel it release behind your ribs. You cry for all of it - for leaving the girls behind, for leaving a place that had sheltered you like a sanctuary. For the time you’d lost at the Dome, for the fights you’d sat out, for the years with your parents and friends that had slipped away like sand between your fingers. For your fear that Seungcheol will turn you away, just as hurt and angry as he was one thousand and ninety-five days ago. 
You’d been so determined to keep him from walking through the depths of your love for him, in the drift. You were so scared it would be too much, too intense, too much emotion for the drift. You’d been scared it would be too much for him - that the weight of it would inherently ask for more than he could give you in return. You’d been scared it would ruin your partnership, your compatibility, your capability to co-pilot.
But that had happened anyway. You almost have to laugh. 
As furiously as your tears begin, they peter out quickly. You take a few deep gulps of salty air, use the backs of your hands to wipe at your cheeks and beneath your nose. As you calm down, you keep your eyes on the horizon, your hands tight on the ship’s railing, and you let your mind wander back to Seungcheol. Here, thousands of miles away, you let yourself think back to those last weeks before you left the Shatterdome. You let yourself wonder, for the first time, what exactly caused everything to crumble.
You’d been so afraid to let Seungcheol into your head once the loving him had taken over. Why had it scared you so badly? As you keep your eyes on the grey of the horizon, you puzzle it out in your mind.
Had it been the uncertainty? That had certainly played a part. Did Seungcheol love you, back then? If he didn’t, everything between you could have changed - your friendship, your partnership, your ability to drift. It hadn’t seemed worth the risk to lose it all - his presence in your life, your ability to fight together. 
But maybe he had. If he did love you, back then… that would have changed things, too. What if starting something romantic affected your drift? There were too many maybes, too many variables. It had seemed safe to push it all down, to try and keep him away from it. To try and keep things the same.
Of course, you’d lost it all anyway.
Even if he did love you three years ago, you think as the sea air whips around you, did he love you the way you loved him? What if it had been too much - the way you could breathe once he was with you, the way you kept each other in check - what if he had loved you, but not that much?
Had it been a mistake to keep him out? Maybe. But it could have been just as catastrophic to let him in. There was no way to know, now.
You turn away from the ship’s railing, away from the horizon and the sea, away from your mistakes. There’s no use looking back like this. You can’t change it. You aren’t even sure you can fix it.
You were hoping to sleep on the plane, but you’re woefully awake well after take-off. Determined not to keep ruminating on what had happened before you left, instead you wonder what awaits you now.
The most-likely scenario, you think, professional and polite - but cold. Like you, he takes duty and responsibility seriously. The airplane bumps, a pocket of air jostling the small craft, and your hands find the armrests and cling tight until it stops.
The best case scenario, of course, would be that enough time has passed that Seungcheol’s hurt has faded. Maybe, you think, maybe he’s moved on from harboring that anger. Maybe he’ll greet you warmly, maybe you’ll pick up right where you left off.
This hope, this day-dream, aches, so much that you blink it away and turn to watch the clouds through the window, a desperate distraction. You crave Seungcheol - you crave feeling safe with his arms around you, you crave the elation you’d feel when he entered the room you were in, you crave the peace that comes with two minds engaged in neural handshake - the peace of someone’s mind interlaced with your own, understanding you, operating with you, picking up half of your mental lift.
You crave his giggle when you say something stupid in the dark of the dorm before bed, his pout when he feels like he isn’t getting enough attention, you crave his voice echoing in your head long after he’s gone asleep because you heard him talk to you all day long. 
You crave his lips on yours, his teeth on your neck, his hands on your body, even if you only had it once. You’ve craved it ever since.
You crave closing your eyes and pressing your forehead to his sternum, feeling safe and quiet and like you belong. You miss the sanctuary of that space, chest to chest with him, something sacred in the way it exists only for you.
You know you can’t have it - any of it. The daydream isn’t real. Your curse will be to crave it forever, alone.
When you arrive at the Shatterdome, it’s your parents who greet you just inside. For a moment, you’re happy to be back, overcome with emotion as you hug them tight. They’ve aged in these three years. You’ve missed them awfully. You only tell them the latter. 
They walk with you to the Marshall’s office, where you’re meant to report upon arrival. 
You hesitate, covering the moment by tugging your duffle’s strap higher on your shoulder. Your mother reads you anyway, reaching out and giving your shoulder a squeeze. 
“It will be okay,” she whispers. 
Your father catches on. “You’ve faced down worse,” he reasons. 
You disagree. There’s no monster in the sea bigger than your love for Seungcheol, no wounding possible that could hurt more than losing him has. But you appreciate the sentiment, so you give them each a grateful nod, tell them you’ll visit after dinner, and turn to knock on the door.
“Come in,” the Marshall’s voice carries through the door, and you turn the knob and step inside. 
All you see is Seungcheol; the Marshall, the office furniture, the flickering screens on the walls all snap into nonexistence in the presence of your former lover. He’s the only thing in the room that comes into focus. Everything else is just fuzzy noise.
His face wavers for a moment when your eyes meet his, the muscles rippling as he fights to get them under control. 
You don’t know what reaction he’s fighting. You don’t know if he’s feeling happiness or hatred. You don’t know if he’s fighting a smile or a scowl.
You give him a quick bow in greeting, and he returns it. His face is stone, now, his mouth tight and eyes flat. 
He turns to face the Marshall, to receive orders, so you do the same.
“I trust your travel went well?” the Marshall begins.
You nod, not trusting yourself to speak. Even the single syllable of yes will come out of your mouth like gravel and dirt and sand, getting everywhere, leaving a trail.
“Your orders,” he says then, a bit of a sigh on his tone - as if he knows the uphill battle this will be, “are to reconnect as best you can. You’ll follow your old schedule. You’ll spar, you’ll meditate, and you’ll talk. After some time, we’ll try the drift again, see if the connection has recovered any.”
Seungcheol’s voice startles you when he speaks. “How long do you imagine it will be before we try?” he asks, just cold enough to have a sliver of sarcasm in it. 
The Marshall’s eyes narrow, just slightly, as if he’d caught it. “That’s entirely up to you two,” he says evenly. “When you were young and hungry to fight, you trained yourselves into exhaustion. You spent every waking second trying to cultivate the bond that would carry you into your jaeger. With the same intention and drive, I imagine you could be piloting Duellona within the week.”
You fight to keep your chin up, your eyes on the Marshall, instead of ducking your head and watching the floor. The Marshall lifts his arm and glances at his watch. 
“Your allotted time in Sparring Room 7 begins on the hour,” he says. This is his way of dismissing you.
In the hallway, you pause. “I’m just going to drop my bag in the dorm,” you say quietly, not looking at Seungcheol. 
He gives a tight nod. “Fine,” he says, and turns to go the other way, towards the sparring and training rooms. Clearly he intends to meet you there. You heave a deep breath, and turn back towards the wing with the dorms.
Stepping into the dorm you used to share with Seungcheol hits you harder than you thought it would. You’re not sure what you expected - to feel like coming home, maybe, or perhaps to be slapped with the memories of you and Seungcheol together, dancing around each other as you hurried to get dressed for a drop, lazing around in the sitting area after a full day of training. And, of course, the single night you’d spent together.
Neither thing happens. You aren’t overcome by a feeling of nostalgia and love, nor are you inundated by memories of what you’ve lost. Instead, the room feels exactly as it is: empty and still.
Your footsteps’ echoes taunt you as you walk through the kitchen, the sitting area, and into the bedroom. It’s pristine to the point of detriment; it feels like no one lives there. You set your bag on the floor near the foot of the bed - you can unpack later, after training - and turn to go.
Strangely, it’s stepping into the training room that slams you with memory and nostalgia. The wood cool beneath your feet, the vague smell of sweat and citrus-y cleaner, the sounds of punches landing and grunts of effort from the training rooms on either side - they all cocoon you in history, making goosebumps rise on your arms as the emotions surround you.
It makes sense, you think, as Seungcheol glances over his shoulder at the sound of your arrival. He doesn’t speak to you, just swaggers to the center of the room and takes a stance you recognize from Form One. Your body leads you opposite him, muscle memory guiding you into the first form you ever learned with him. It makes sense that this would be what felt like home - your minds going empty together, your bodies following the steps in unison. The sparring forms are the closest you can get to drifting without an actual neural connection.
Well, that and sleeping together, but you don’t see that on your agenda.
You stare at him across the invisible circle between you and try to read him. His face is cold and empty, but that already tells you so much about what he’s feeling. Seungcheol was never cold with you. When you fought together he slipped into that mode you loved so much - ready to level anything, chin lifted, eyes narrowed, confident and so very strong. But it was when you were together outside the fights that you had loved him best - often pouting, lips protruding, voice lifting into a whine. And the best of all - that smile, dimples creating shadows that beg for your thumb to press them, eyes squeezing shut with happiness or laughter.
Something must show on your face, because you watch the muscles in Seungcheol’s upper body untense, as if he’d been ready to fight and recognized that you weren’t.
“I’m good,” you mutter quickly, before he can ask. It feels better to lie to him before he actually asks you, like that’s somehow less dishonest. “Let’s go.”
Form One is basic - no hits, no fancy moves. At the training center, you’d teach it to the littlest ones until they had it memorized. It was really about control and communication - precision and alignment with your partner. You had to breathe together as your feet traced opposite circles across the knots in the wooden floor. You had to rise and bend in unison. It was about watching and listening.
You and Seungcheol could - literally, you’d tried more than once - do it blindfolded in perfect step with one another. Before. You don’t know if you still can. But, now, unblindfolded, it’s too easy.
You move through forms one through six without incident - both of you flowing as easily as water.
Form Seven is the first form that incorporates actual hits and blocks. You’ll have to touch for the first time, even if it’s forearm to forearm or ankle to shoulder. You move right as he moves left, crouch and circle as his right foot flies over your head, stand and punch where you know his open hand will be waiting to stop you.
It is, and you press your fist against it for just a second before spinning away to continue the form. You ache, even as your body continues following the steps, to have him entirely again - to meet his eyes and smile the way you both used to, because you were pleased with what your bodies could do. Because you had each other, completely.
After the tenth form, you bow, turn, and walk out of the ring. You drink some water, your back to him. Years ago you’d have used this break to chat, but you don’t know what to say to him. You’re scared that he’ll shut down anything you say, whether you choose small talk or go straight for the heart of the problem, and you honestly don’t think you can shoulder his rejection right now. So you stay quiet.
After a few short minutes of rest, you return to the center of the room. This is when you’ll spar for real.
You and Seungcheol had done this for years before things went wrong. You’d long ago adjusted to how hard you should hit, how to dodge his moves, how to make this a dance as much as a fight. Now, you feel like it’s your first time again.
Seungcheol attacks as you’d expect - all offensive, pushy, succeeding in herding you backwards even as you dodge each blow. You know his goal is to flip you, and normally you can avoid that by forcing him to go on the defensive as he avoids your own hits. Simply dodging won’t be enough - eventually he’ll cage you in unless you distract him.
You throw yourself into a summersault and manage to get behind him - an opportune moment to strike. You shift your weight to follow the blow as you twist your hips to send a kick towards his unprotected head. He turns just too late - the blow will land.
You can’t do it. You freeze, your core working to keep you upright as you fight your own momentum, halting the kick inches from his temple.
You know immediately that pulling the hit was a mistake. His eyes narrow, and he sweeps his foot at the ankle you’re balancing on. You crash to the ground, heaving a breath and taking quick inventory.
You aren’t hurt. Not this time.
“Get up, Cherry,” he says darkly, moving back to the center to start again. “And don’t do that shit again.”
He comes at you full force in the next match, too. You dodge and weave, but you don’t try to strike. You know he knows it; this isn’t how it used to work. You can almost feel him get angrier as you fight, but you can’t make yourself hit back. You want him to knock you down, you deserve to take some shots.
You take two blows to the back and one to a shoulder; you fall back unsteadily but manage to find your footing and roll away from his next kick.
The match continues - you taking a handful of blows, though none with the force to level you, and Seungcheol with his lip curled in fury.
“If you’re not going to fight, then leave,” he spits.
“Would if I could,” you retort without thinking. You mean that you don’t want to be here like this - not talking, cold, at odds. But you know it reads as not wanting to be here at all.
It seems like everything you say and do only hurts him more.
“I didn’t mean -” you start, and Seungcheol takes your arms and flips you over his shoulders.
“Don’t waste my fucking time,” he says, brushing his hands together and stepping back to give you room to pick yourself up.
“Don’t curse at me,” you answer, pushing yourself to your hands and knees, pausing to catch your breath before rising fully again.
He shakes his head, rolls his eyes a little.
You hate this side of him.
You know you deserve it. For pushing him out. For leaving him here. For loving him, messing everything up, when he never asked for that.
“Seungcheol,” you say, but he ignores you, pacing a few steps and then turning to face you, lowering himself into a defensive stance, ready to spar again.
“Cheol,” you try again. “Listen to me.”
“Marshall scheduled us time to talk later,” he says flatly. “Right now we’re scheduled to fight. So fight me, Cherry. Let’s go.”
The rest of the hour continues the same. By the time it’s over, Seungcheol storms out without speaking to you, furious over every single pulled punch.
You don’t know what to do to make it all better.
You shower quickly, dressing in dry linens, and then re-emerge for the hours you’re scheduled to meditate together. You hope that maybe this will help the situation - maybe not talking will be good for you, give you a chance to feel your connection without the chance to fuck it up with words.
You’re wrong; trying to meditate together is just as desperately fruitless as sparring had been.
You can’t focus at all - can’t shift your attention to your breath, to your body, to the earth beneath you, to the energy of your partner.
Your partner is the distraction, though he sits perfectly still, eyes closed. He might as well be yelling. His shoulders are tight, his jaw still clenched. Anger radiates off him so strongly that it makes your stomach hurt, makes you want to cower from it. You can’t stop watching him, hoping you’ll see him relax, hoping you’ll see the moment that he lets go.
He doesn’t.
“Your eyes are supposed to be closed,” he murmurs, and you feel your face heat, embarrassed that he knew you were watching him.
“I can’t,” you admit. Maybe, you think, you should just be brutally honest, starting now. It’s not like you could make this worse. “I can’t stop noticing how angry -”
“Then stop pissing me off,” he snaps, eyes opening. “Just a suggestion.”
“Don’t talk to me like that!” you cry, and push yourself to stand. You’re not sure why - maybe just to pace. “You never used to talk to me like this. Who are you?”
He looks at the floor, the first sign of guilt you’ve seen since you came home.
“Fine,” he finally bites back, and you know it’s as close to sorry as you’ll get. “I’ll reign it in. Sit back down.”
You shift your weight, arms crossed defensively across your chest, and close your eyes, deciding.
“Sit down, Cherry,” he repeats, and it’s gentler now. That’s what makes you cave, and you settle back across from him.
He’s less tense this time, so you eventually manage to close your eyes and count your breaths. But you’re still feeling for him, reaching for him in your mind, and coming up with nothing between you fingers. Touching him is as possible as touching the fog that used to blanket the training center, thick enough to blind you but impossible to grasp.
The pain feels like a cramp, except it’s behind your ribs instead of in your muscles. The pain grips and tightens, takes over. You want him, you want to be his again, you want to be inside these walls - where you used to fit comfortably. The fact that you’re out here, without him, aches so badly it makes you nauseated.
You want to beg him - let me in again, let me back in, let me be close to you again.
It won’t do any good, and you know it.
He was yours - you had him, you knew him, you could reach out to him and he’d pick you up. You’d taken it for granted, and you’d run away from it. You’d chosen to let it go, and now all you get is this: Seungcheol, cold and closed. Seungcheol, hating you for everything that happened.
Dinner is just as bad.
You go to the mess hall eager to see Wylie and Jeonghan and Seungkwan and all the other friends you haven’t seen in years. Wylie screeches like a banshee when she spots you, crossing the mess hall in a blur and hugging you so tightly that you both stagger, off balance, until Seungkwan joins the hug and rights you again.
“I missed you both so much,” you whisper, the only vulnerability anyone’s going to get out of you today.
“Then don’t leave again!” Wylie snaps, but you know the admonishment is full of love.
“I can’t promise,” you admit. Honestly, you’ve already made up your mind - you want to go back to Alaska. You’re not wanted here, not by the person who matters. What good are you, taking up a bed, if you can’t drift?
You’ve already given up hope that he’ll come around.
Seated at the table, you listen while your friends fill you in on what you’ve missed in three years - the fights in the bay, the new teams of pilots, the illnesses and injuries. You almost don’t notice Seungcheol silently takes a seat on Jeonghan’s other side, but something in you prickles, like you’ve sensed him.
The tension around the table heightens; the conversation goes a little stilted. When it’s apparent that he’s going to ignore you two seats down from him, Wylie slaps her hand flat on the tabletop.
“Come on, Seungcheol,” she scolds, and you’re sure no one wonders what she means.
His face goes dark so quickly it’s alarming. “Don’t,” he tells her darkly, one finger coming up to point at her in warning.
Her own eyes narrow and dart to her fork. Beside her, Chan’s eyes pingpong between them. He’s probably wondering if he should hold her back or join her.
“It’s fine,” you mutter, grabbing your tray and making to rise. “I’ll go.”
“Cherry, no,” Wylie protests, and then turns a glower onto your ex-co-pilot as if to say see what you did?
“It’s fine,” you repeat, standing. “I told my mom and dad I’d come by.”
You slink out before anyone else can argue.
You can’t even be mad at him - you did this by pushing him away. You hammered every last nail in the coffin by requesting to transfer. You pushed him out and you left him behind and now you have to face the reality that you can’t have him anymore. He isn’t yours, not anymore.
When you return to your dorm, he’s already in bed, the lights out. He’s facing the wall so you can only see his back, can only see the angry, tight shoulder poking out the top of the sheets. It tells you everything you need to know.
You don’t try to talk to him. You just go to bed.
You spend four days identically - fighting while sparring, not meditating, and avoiding Seungcheol’s ice-out. On the fifth day, your Marshall loses patience and changes your schedule. Your entire day is blocked to working on Duellona’s mainframe - buffing, repainting, greasing, and anything else you’re able to handle on your own.
“Since you can’t do anything else useful,” he adds, and you avoid Seungcheol’s eyes, ashamed.
Standing under Duellona’s unlit frame fills you with guilt. It feels like you’re letting her down, disappointing her by letting her rust here, failing your half of the bargain. You run your hands gently over the metal, finding the rough spots that need attention. Somewhere to your left, you can hear the telltale sounds of Seungcheol tightening bolts.
You work in silence for hours.
Eventually, you crack. You’re not sure if it’s the monotony of the task, the tension woven into the silence between you too, or being so close to your jaeger but unable to fight in it - maybe a combination. Something pushes at you from the inside, like a balloon trying to inflate under your skin and running out of room.
You flop backwards on the metal walkway, the grooves digging into your back. “What are we doing?” you ask, and you hear the tool Seungcheol had been using cling loudly as he sets it down.
“Following orders?” he says, stepping around Duellona’s side to look at you. “Fixing up the jaeger?”
“Fixing up the jaeger we don’t get to pilot?” you ask, sitting back up to look at him better.
“Is that what you’re here for?” he asks, the sudden ferocity of it surprising you. “To fight? Is that why you came back?”
You reach up to the walkway’s railing and pull yourself up. You feel yourself frowning at his question, at the heat behind it. 
“I’m back because the Marshall gave me an order,” you say slowly. 
“And that’s it?” he demands. 
You stare at him. You feel sure there’s more to the question, more that he’s asking. You feel sure, after knowing Choi Seungcheol down to the last molecule, that he’s really asking, you didn’t come back for me?
And it confuses you. You try to think about your split from his perspective: you’d shut him out, then slept with him, and then vanished. You’d made a lot of assumptions about his anger since then. You assumed he was angry at you for pushing him out of your head. You assumed he was angry at you for sleeping with him and then leaving. You assumed he was angry with you for ruining your drift, for ripping him away from the ability to fight. You assumed he was angry because he never knew why - never knew what it was that you were so desperate to hide, never knew why sleeping together had made things so much worse that the neural connection had fizzled into nothing altogether.
Is there more to it, his anger?
Should you call him on it, should you ask?
You take too long deciding. Seungcheol scoffs, like he’s disgusted with you. “I should have known,” he says coldly. “Princess of the Shatterdome, I should have known you only cared about piloting - about your legacy.”
This is something you’ve never said to him - that your desire to shine as brightly as your parents has weighed on you. This is something he’d pulled from the drift, something he only knew from tiptoeing around your mind before a fight. 
“That isn’t fair,” you say, your voice hard. “Is there another reason I should have come back? I’d love to hear it.”
He hears the challenge as it is - you didn’t ask me to come back, the Marshall did. You let me go.
He has nothing to say for himself, just stares back at you, eyes narrowed in anger, chest moving too quickly as he battles with his temper.
“Exactly,” you say curtly. The victory stings. It doesn’t feel like a win at all. “The bottom line is I’m here now, and we can pilot again if we can get our shit together.”
He shakes his head. “You left,” he says finally. “That’s the bottom line. You decided you were out, you decided you didn’t want me in your head, and then you left.”
He watches you, waits for you to say something. When you don’t, he lets out a derisive little laugh. “We’re both wasting our time here. The drift won’t work. We aren’t going to fix it.”
For the first time, fear slices through you like steel. “You can’t know that,” you say. You hear the fear in the way your voice comes out low and rounded, barely sounding like you at all.
“I can,” he retorts. “You know how I know? Because I don’t want to. You wanted me out of your head so badly? You got it. Can’t turn back now.”
He heads for the ladder, swings around and finds the third rung down with ease.
“So that’s it?” you ask his retreating form. Your heart is hammering and you’re starting to get tunnel vision. 
The only answer he gives you are his feet hitting each new rung with a clunk and a vibration that rattles up your legs.
You go to the training rooms alone and run through the forms just to do something; your mind turns the problem over and over as your body goes through the motions. After, you take a longer shower than normal, letting the water run hotter than you normally would.
After, you go to the Marshall’s office, determined. Or maybe resigned.
When he opens the door, he already looks irritated, like he knew exactly who would be on the other side.
“Requesting an audience,” you say flatly, fighting the instinct to cross your arms defensively.
He glances at his watch. “Five minutes.”
You step inside but leave the door open.
“I’m requesting transfer back to Alakanuk,” you tell him as evenly as you can manage. You’re sure he’s not surprised. “Seungcheol has made it very clear that we won’t be fighting together again. If that’s the case, then I can’t do anything useful here. But in Alakanuk I can.”
You pause, looking to see if you can read anything on the Marshall’s face - any hint that he’s considering what you’re saying, or that it’s a lost cause. He gives you nothing.
“Please,” you say. “Those girls need me. If I can’t help here, I can help them.”
The Marshall tilts his head just slightly. “Surely anyone can teach little girls the forms.”
You shake your head. “It’s more than that, and you know it. It’s not about the forms. I love those girls. I came back here to follow orders, and I tried. But if it isn’t going to happen… Please, don’t make me waste time here if I can be with them instead.”
The silence when you stop speaking seems to last for hours. Your heart pounds, and you work on keeping your breathing even. If he tells you no, you might just lose it, just give up entirely.
Finally, he takes a breath and seems to consider you. “If,” he says, and your eyes widen with hope, “your co-pilot agrees, then I will reassign you back to Alaska. But only if he will agree.”
“No problem,” you say quickly. Seungcheol was the one who said it was over. He should have no problem letting you leave.
When you step out of the Marshall’s office, Seungcheol steps out of the shadows. You should be surprised to see him, but in the Shatterdome it feels right that he just is wherever you are. That’s always how it was, before.
You look at him disdainfully. “I assume you heard that conversation?”
He nods, once.
“So?” you ask. “Will you tell him you approve, so I can go?”
For the first time since you returned, Seungcheol smiles, tight and sarcastic.
“No,” he says easily, like it’s kind of funny.
Fury erupts inside you; you can’t even pinpoint where in your body it stems from. “Why?” you demand. “Because you feel like I took something from you, so you want to take something from me?”
He doesn’t respond to this. You know you’re right. You know him. You know his mind.
“I hate to fuck up your narrative,” you spit at him, “but I’ve lost out here just as much as you have. You’re not the only one who lost the ability to fight. You’re not the only one who lost their partner.”
You wish you could tell him the rest - you’re not the one who spent three years with a broken heart on top of it. He had lost you as a partner and a friend - you had lost him in the same ways, and you’d had to harbor your broken heart.
He shakes his head. “Poor baby,” he bites sarcastically, and then takes off down the hallway, into the dark.
You stop sleeping at the dorm. Sometimes you sleep at your parents’, sometimes on Wylie and Chan’s tiny couch, sometimes in bed with Seungkwan, who kicks at you and whines that you take up too much space. Sometimes you sleep inside Duellona Fury, sitting up, your back against her metal frame.
The Marshall seems to have taken some pity on you. He schedules your mornings training the Dome’s recruits, and lets Seungcheol get back to what he was doing in your absence - which seems to be on track to move up in rank, to maybe become a Marshall himself, someday. It isn’t quite the same as being back with your girls, but training recruits feels at least somewhat fulfilling. And it keeps you and Seungcheol busy - separately - until afternoon.
Then, he schedules you to spar.
In your first week, you’d been unwilling to hit Seungcheol. You’d been feeling guilty for hurting him, sad for your time apart, hopeful that if you were soft to him, then he’d be soft back to you.
Now, you’re fucking furious.
For the first time, when the match begins, you hit him first. He’s surprised for only a second, eyebrows shooting up as he stumbles for balance, and then you watch something delighted and devilish fall over his face. Like he knows exactly what dance this is, and he’s been learning the steps in secret.
The match is brutal, reminiscent of your very first one, when you were both nineteen. You throw hit after hit his way; he blocks or dodges all of them. But he can’t get a hit on you either - you’re too quick, spurred on by fury. You’ve been angry in a fight before. But you’ve never been angry at him.
You spin and throw up a kick, expecting his forearm to rise and block it. Instead, you knock him in the jaw.
He grunts, hand flying up to cover his mouth, and you drop your stance with a gasp.
“Shit!” you cry, hurrying closer. “I’m so sorry! Are you bleeding? Let me look.”
“‘M fine,” he mutters thickly from behind his hand, but you ignore him. For a second, things are how they used to be between you. He lets you peel his hand away, lets you gingerly turn his head this way and that, even opens up so you can check his teeth.
“You’re gonna have a fat lip,” you tell him regretfully. “But nothing’s bleeding. Teeth look okay. Anything loose in there?”
He pokes around his teeth with his pinky. “Nope.”
You take a step back, cowed. “I’m really sorry.”
He laughs a little, wryly. “I bet you feel better, though.”
You bite back a smile. “Actually…” you say, and he laughs again. You both do.
Somehow, this seems to be the thing that cracks the anger you’ve both been encased in, unable to move forward or backward. You feel melted, and you wonder if he feels freer now, too.
“I didn’t mean to hurt you,” you say. You mean the kick, but the words land heavy.
He avoids your gaze. “I need some water,” he says, turning and heading to the side of the room.
You do the same, sitting heavily on the bench where your water waits for you.
“Hey,” he says, and you look over, brows raised in anticipation. “Tell me about Alaska.”
You can’t help but smile.
“It’s so beautiful,” you tell him. “God, Cheol, the ocean there. And the birds, and the snow…”
He’s watching you, listening, but while he listens he stands and heads to the center of the ring, settling into a starting form. With a small smile, you follow, standing opposite him. He starts an easy match that’s mostly just following the eighth form. It includes some hits and blocks, but you both do them gently, easily, circling each other slowly.
“So you liked it?” he asks. You can hear how hard he’s working to make it sound casual.
“It was so beautiful,” you admit before ducking below a kick. “But it was also… really hard.”
“What was the best part?” he asks.
You smile, block a hit. He almost gets his hands on you for a flip, but you dodge around behind him. He turns to follow you. “Weirdly, it was taking care of them outside of class. We - the instructors - we kind of their moms, away from home, you know? I’m the one who knew Yejin won’t sleep unless someone sits by her bed for a while. I’m the one that knew that Farrah and Salome only argue because they’re competitive. I’m the one that knew that Maria and Anjali don’t know their times-tables, that Ximena can’t brush her own hair, or that Iseul is allergic to fish. I loved them. I loved knowing them.”
He looks at you for a long time. “Maybe you should go back,” he says finally.
It feels like a trap. 
You look at the floor, at the wall, then finally back at him. “If you’ll do this for real,” you say carefully, “then I’d rather be here. If we’re actually trying, then I don’t want to go.”
He’s quiet for a long time. Finally, he swallows hard, not looking at you.
“What was the worst part?”
There’s only one answer.
“Missing you,” you say. “Losing you.”
He manages to get both of your arms and hauls you over his shoulders. You land on your back so hard that the air is knocked out of your lungs and your eyes close protectively. For a second, you lay there panting, waiting for the pain in your back to settle down, waiting for the stars behind your eyelids to calm.
When you open them again, the ceiling coming into focus above you, the room is empty.
You have a hunch on where you can find him, and you head to the jaeger bay. Sure enough, he’s sitting below Duellona, knees to his chest, staring up at her.
You sit next to him and he doesn’t get up and leave, which you take as a good sign.
“I can’t do this if you’re not all in,” he tells you without looking at you. “You walked away from me once. I can’t let you back in my head if there’s any possibility you’ll walk away again. If you’re with me, I need you to be with me.”
Something prickles in the back of your head. You feel like you’re starting to realize something - the seed of an understanding is pushing delicately through the dirt, but hasn’t yet spread out its leaves under the warmth of the sun yet.
Something about his hurt. Something about why.
“I think we should try to drift,” you tell him.
This seems to startle him - he forgets to be cold, turns to look at you, eyebrows raised in surprise.
“I can tell you how much I missed you,” you reason, “and tell you about how I spent every minute just… steeped in regret. Or we can walk through it - you can see for yourself.”
You know what you’re risking. If he gets into your head now, he’ll see it all - he’ll know everything, he’ll be able to feel for himself the depth of your loss, the height of your love. 
But what’s the harm, now? You can’t lose him twice. Maybe it’ll be enough for him to realize you hadn’t left him because you didn’t care about him. Maybe it’ll be enough for his forgiveness. 
Maybe then, he’ll tell the Marshall to let you go back to Alakanuk. 
It’s Seungkwan you bother, since he’d been in mission control before finding his team of co-pilots. The sideways look he gives you as he walks to your conn pod is withering, but you know better than to take it personally.
You buzz with nerves. The last time you’d tried this, the neural handshake hadn’t even connected. There had just been nothing.
The second you hear neural handshake initiating, you almost sob with relief. You can’t even pay attention to the memories - Seungcheol’s memories - floating around you; you want to collapse, to press your palms to the ground and thank the universe for letting you back in.
His first memories are a breeze - the ones you’ve jogged through together hundreds of times: his first home, his school, his father’s hospital room, the Dome. Then you slow your pace, because this is new.
You’re facing the landing dock on the Shatterdome’s roof. Seungcheol stands with his back to you, watching through the glass walls as a helicopter waits, the pilot talking into his headset.
You watch yourself walk towards the chopper’s open door. You watch yourself leave, remember how hard it was to not look back.
You hadn’t known that Seungcheol had been there, that he had seen you go.
The pain that accompanies the memory hits you like you’re drowning, like it’s too deep and you can’t feel the bottom, and you feel the machinery falter around you.
“Hey,” you say quietly. “I’m with you.”
He nods, still doesn’t look at you. But the beeping stops, the connection holding. 
There’s knowledge in this memory, knowledge in this pain. Seungcheol’s thoughts in this moment read in your head as clearly as if he said them aloud - I did this. I pushed her too far; I made her run.
You can’t stay here, can’t let him wallow in the memory of pain. You had to move forward - that’s how the drift works. Reluctantly you step towards the door, glancing over your shoulder to see if he’s following. 
He is. His jaw is tight and fists are clenched, but he is.
When the next memory - not in order of chronology, clearly - appears before you, you want to vanish into the floor. You’re watching yourselves in Seungcheol’s bed. Thankfully, you’re sleeping - this was after. But in the memory, Seungcheol is awake, laying on his side, his eyes drinking in your sleeping form.
The emotions and the knowledge come with it in an instant. The tenderness and the love he felt in that moment surround you now in the memory, unignorable, impossible to mistake. 
He had loved you. He had known you loved him, and he was showing you how he felt. The understanding slams you so hard that you think you stop breathing.
“Seungcheol,” you whisper. Around you, the scene begins to flicker, the connection starting to react to the oversaturation of emotion.
“We can talk about it after,” he says, voice hard. “Don’t stay in it. Find the next door.”
Your eyes find the door, but you feel frozen. You want the connection to drop, you want to unlock yourself from the stupid drive-suit and throw yourself into his arms, you want to apologize for leaving him thinking he’d pushed you away, thinking that he scared you into running.
“Cherry,” he warns. “The drift can’t -”
You know. 
And you owe him your side of the story.
You take a steeling breath and head for the door. You don’t take his hand. You don’t know if you deserve to, if he’d want you to.
When you step through the doors, you’re confused - you’re still in your dorm. Your bodies are both in the bed.
Now, though, Seungcheol sleeps, and you - the memory of you - sits on the edge of the bed, your head in your hands. 
You feel the emotion the memory holds, which means Seungcheol does, too.
Fear. It’s still fear - fear that he’ll know, fear that what you just did together will make it worse, make it harder to hide. 
Beside you, Seungcheol’s eyes go wide. 
“We have to move on,” you tell him. He looks at you, then back at the memory. 
“You -?” he starts to ask.
“After,” you tell him firmly. “We’ll talk after.”
You open the door, and you’re suddenly outside, surrounded by white.
Alaska.
The emotion knocks you over with the fury of an ocean wave - even though you know you’re not supposed to let it. This was how you had felt every day that you were gone, and it screams at you now, determined to be heart, determined to be felt. The loneliness, the regret, the despair and heartbreak all rise up in you, overtaking you, as snow falls gently and silently around you.
And the love. That never went away. That never mellowed, as the Marshall had put it.
If he didn’t know before, he has to know now. There’s no way he couldn’t.
Seungcheol squeezes your hand, and you almost jump. You look down at your linked fingers in shock, then up at him, eyes wide.
“We should go back and talk about this,” he tells you, but his grip on you is firm, assuring.
“Okay. It’s this way,” you tell him, trying to breathe, and you lead him by the hand through the snow. The fog strengthens as you walk, until you can’t see anything but grey, can’t see anything but Seungcheol’s hand in yours.
You continue on. You know where to go. When you step through, the fog vanishes as if it was never there, nothing gradual about it. With the fog gone, you can see clearly where you are - inside Duellona Fury’s conn-pod.
As you begin to work on the straps, you call through the intercom, “Kwan? We… need some privacy. We’ve got to talk - alone.”
His voice crackles back at you. “Yes, I’m leaving, I’m already gone. If you hear popcorn crunching, no you don’t.”
Seungcheol gives you a flat look. “Let’s go home and talk,” he suggests.
Home.
You are so afraid and so hopeful. You don’t know how to juggle both.
Back in your small living space, you sit like you’re meditating.
“Let’s figure this out,” he says. “No lies.”
“No lies,” you agree. Your knees touch, and you reach to take his hands. He lets you, giving your fingers a squeeze.
“You knew,” you say first, bordering on accusation. “I was trying so hard to hide how I felt about you… but you knew.”
He nods, his eyes on you. “And you,” he says slowly, “didn’t… know? That I knew?”
You shake your head, confirming. “I didn’t know. I thought I hid it.”
He smiles at you, a little placating. “Not as well as you would have liked.”
“And you…” You chicken out, swallow, force yourself to be brave. “You… loved me, too?”
He nods. “I did.” 
The air leaves your lungs so forcefully that you bend over, pressing your forehead to the tops of your hands. He pulls his hands from yours and you feel his touch, firm and reassuring, cupping your shoulders and rubbing his thumbs along them.
“We felt the same,” you echo into your shins. “You loved me.”
“Cherry,” he says above you, his voice like a plea. “I don’t understand why - when we… when I… I felt like once I forced you to look at it, it was too much. You ran.”
You sit with this for a minute, stunned and processing. His hands are back in yours, which you take as a good sign. 
“You thought… wait. You thought, after that night, that I knew how you felt, too?”
He nods. “I thought you knew,” he says, confusion still present in his tone. “I thought we both knew. I thought if it was out in the open, the glitch in the drift would be fixed.”
You wipe at your face, trying to breathe. “And instead,” you realize, “we couldn’t even connect, because I was still trying to hide it from you, and then you were hurt. I thought it was broken. I thought we really broke it forever.”
He looks at you in wonder. “That’s why you left,” he breathes, and you know he’s understanding this for the first time. “You thought we made the problem worse.”
It’s your turn to nod. “After we…I mean, I knew if I couldn’t hide it from you before that night, there was no chance I’d be able to hide it after. I kept you out in the first place because I… was afraid. I was afraid for you to see how much I loved you. It seemed… hopeless to keep trying.”
The words lay bloody between you, but his grip on your hands is strong, and you take another breath.
You push on, adding, “I was afraid it would be too much. I was afraid everything would change.”
Which it did, you think. He nods, like he hears this, like he agrees.
He releases you and leans back, blowing out a loud breath. “We’re so fucking stupid,” he says, and you splutter out a laugh.
“We really are.”
“I can’t believe we lost three years over that,” he says.
“I can’t believe you thought it was your fault that I left.”
“I can’t believe you left in the first place.”
This makes you smile, guilty. “That’s fair.”
You push yourself to stand; Seungcheol mirrors you, as if you’re already in the neural handshake, bodies working in tandem. 
“Cherry,” he says quietly, stepping closer. “It could never be too much. I love you. I’m crazy about you. I’m only me when I’m with you.”
You remember him, the night you’d slept together, telling you, don’t be afraid. He’d told you, after all, and you’d missed it entirely.
You close the distance between your bodies and kiss him hard. His arms circle your waist immediately, like they were waiting for you. He kisses you back hungrily. His mouth meets yours eagerly, his tongue stroking yours confidently before he shifts his attention to your jaw, your neck, then your mouth again. His hands don’t wander this time - instead he holds you so firmly it almost hurts, like he won’t let you move an inch, won’t let you out of his grasp ever again.
You cradle his face between your hands, let your teeth gently scrape along his bottom lip. “Cheol,” you whisper, then kiss him again. “You’re everything.” It’s what you should have said aloud the night you’d slept with him.
When the kiss breaks, he presses his lips to the top of your head and holds them there, melting around you a little. You give his middle a squeeze, revel in his heartbeat surrounding you like music.
“I’m sorry,” he whispers. “I’m sorry I didn’t just say it.”
“Me too,” you tell him, holding him just a little tighter. “I should never have tried to hide it from you in the first place.”
He kisses your temple, and you hold each other, silently, each grappling with the time you’d wasted apart. 
You’re interrupted by a knock. You break apart, puzzled. You’re even more puzzled to see your Marshall at the door, and Seungkwan literally bouncing on the balls of his feet in excitement.
“I’ve heard your drift is working again,” the Marshall says dryly. 
You look over your shoulder at Seungcheol, grinning. “Seems like it.”
“There’s a Cat-1 reading in the bay. I was about to alarm for Pretty Savage to drop, but Savage’s team insisted I give you the opportunity first. They can follow as backup. How do you feel?”
Seungcheol is at your side. He looks at you, his face open and raw. “Well?” he asks you. “Are you in, or are you out?”
“I’m in,” you tell him seriously. “I’m with you.”
You thrum with excitement as a tech team helps strap you into the drive-suits, and you can’t help but shoot Seungcheol a wild grin, your happiness alive and unbounded. 
You tell mission control - Nainsi, probably, just like the old days - “Ready and aligned.”
Mission Control - definitely Nainsi - responds, “Prepare for neural handshake.”
The artificial voice bounces around you - 3… 2… 1… neural handshake initiating…
Around you, the machines flicker busily. Neural handshake strong and holding. Now calibrating…
You’re crying, but you ignore it. You beam through tears, looking sideways at your co-pilot. His eyes dance as he smiles back at you. You want to unstrap yourself to the drivesuit and go kiss his dimples, the dimples you hadn’t seen in years. You resist the urge.
��Ready to drop?”  He looks sideways at you, sly. 
You scoff at him, your own grin cocky and sure, like you’re twenty again, like nothing had ever been broken between you. “Been ready. Let’s light ‘em up.”
– end
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thank you so much for reading!!!!
stay tuned for more fics in this universe! Wylie and Chan will get their own fic written by @sailorrhansol, as will Woozi! I'm also planning a Vernon x Reader in this universe, too! Should be a fun time!!
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choochooboss · 18 days ago
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Submas Sketchdump Vol. 4 July 2022 Part 2!!
I knew that particular month beat my all time record for productivity multifold but I had forgotten SO MANY PIECES from the original collection!! I think I finally got them all?? More stuff under the cut!!
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BREAKMAS!! WIP of the first piece I posted of them, here's the link to the final version! I tried coloring this first but the black & white had ultimately more impact so I went with that!
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TRAINS!! I like this base color version too! Link to the final version!
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The top sketch is a direct reference to Cluedo! A spinoff game, "Missingo", starring certain familiar characters trying to figure out what happened to Ingo/trying to prove their innocence in the case! Also WIP sketches for these two Breakmas comic pages!
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As you may know I adore butlermas! For the classy and stylish look which appeals to me in general, and coincidentally I had played PLA & got hit by submas train only one week before butler Ingo's banner rolled out! The pure bliss of finally meeting both twins in a game I felt was incomparable!! This moment in the Curious Tea Party event was really entertaining to me! We got to see submas get serious and stand up against this selfish collector thief! Two towering train twinks with commanding voices looming over the unfortunate guy was enough to make him change his mind ahah! They truly are the protectors
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1-hour submas challenge prompt "Descend"! This is the actual one hour result before I continued rendering this!
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Mmmmm not my first attempt at drawing them hug and definitely not my best OR last. I want to make that moment something very special when I finally go all out on it!!
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Comic cover vibing~
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The scrapped last page for this silly comic! Sorry the dialogue is all over the place on the first piece, might be hard to read! I wasn't happy with how I presented Elesa, I wasn't familiar enough with her character back then so I thought of her carrying a toy taser to threat her friend even as a joke was too much and I couldn't come up with anything else for it. This held me back from posting the other three pages for another 5 months! In the last panel
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I prefer to not mess up the twins too much but my brain is still very curious and conjures some peculiar stuff like this sometimes.. I think I may have broken his arms there looking at the anatomy, ooops! I hope you don't mind the photo quality or the two weird guys in the corner, they escaped containment!
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Idea of warden Ingo, being projected to modern era by his Alakazam, walking through crowd on a train platform & Emmet standing inside a passing train. Their eyes meet for just a few seconds...
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Pokemas Ingo practise!
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Another WIP of a piece I posted! I started this piece like this but then later I decided to flip the whole thing.
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YET another WIP of something I already posted! No idea why I went and mixed up his suits but I like this sketch! They rarely end up looking this clean haha
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Sketch version of the self-defense practise piece! I love getting creative with action stuff! I barely ever think of how difficult they are to draw, I just get so excited and fixated on visualising the scenes in my mind I just keep at it, pull out refs and pose in front of mirrors until it looks good to me! I want to draw more action scenes but besides being challenging to draw my brain comes up with more silly and cute ideas than cool ones unfortunately ahah
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One more WIP, here's the link to the final results!! I really like how genuine their expressions look here even if the faces are a little off. I recall spending a long time figuring out this perspective. I thought it would be fun to you to see how all these pieces started and... looking at the sketch above and the stuff before that, you can compare some range of my style!
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RANDOM SUBMAS MISSILES GO
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OHHH looks like some nasty passengers got the best of them!! If I recall correctly there was no fight because they managed to paralyse the two before they could act. Fully awake yet completely helpless... how convenient unfortunate. Thank you so much for checking these out!! Not every sketch is that exciting but I'm always happy to hear your thoughts on these!
Previous posts: Sketch dump Vol. 1: April-June 2022 Sketch dump Vol. 2: July 2022 Sketch dump Vol. 3: August 2022
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syoddeye · 2 months ago
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kinktober - day 03 - public sex
ghost x f!reader | 2.4k words cw: noncon/rape, violent threats, spit, degradation, improvised gag, unnegotiated and vague allusion breeding kink, abduction a/n: if anyone is better acquainted with the vw camper vans, no you’re not (please don’t call me on details, ty) summary: two birds, one stone. banner by @/cafekitsune | kinktober list
A knock at the door mid-saxophone solo wrenches you out of the 1980s.
It’s Lost Boys night at the drive-in, one of your favorite films at one of your favorite places. To be interrupted, your knee-jerk reaction is what does this asshole want—
Except, said asshole looms over your door, clearing your car by almost a foot, treating you to a view of a broad torso in a hi-vis vest. Ducking down, your frown gives way to confusion. It’s the security guy who waved you into this very ‘spot’ not ten minutes ago. You had to beg him to let you turn into the drive-in, frantically explaining that work kept you late, causing you to arrive just as the movie started.
“Lot’s full.”
“That can’t be right, I-I have a ticket! Please?”
(If you’d dipped a little low to give him a good view of your cleavage, that was neither here nor there.)
He’d given you a long look, sighed, and then guided your puttering van into a relatively flat space by the dumpsters beyond the final row of cars. When you stuck your head out to thank him, he muttered something about tardiness. 
It appears he still has a bone to pick with you.
You crank the window down, one eye still on the screen.
“Yeah?”
“Just wonderin’, that a ‘75 Volkswagen camper?”
“It’s an ‘82 T3 Westfalia,” You rattle off. “You a collector? ‘Cause The Bluebird’s not for sale. She was my dad’s, so...”
“I’m not. Is it the model with the foldin' table?”
Oh, so he’s just another nosy enthusiast. Good thing you have the rundown memorized from years of strangers walking up to play twenty questions.
“Yeah,” you say with a little sigh, eyes still on the movie. “Everything’s original except for the seat fabric.”
“Mind if I pop in for a look? My dad 'ad one too, before 'e passed.”
Great. Now you have something in common. You unlock the doors and furiously gesture for him to take a peek. 
“Yeah, yeah, climb in. Just keep it quiet, I love this movie.”
“Quiet’s the goal, sweet'eart.”
Cripes.
You listen to him inspect the cupboards and examine the curtains your dad installed years ago. True to his word, the security guard’s silent. When the door shuts, you automatically turn to ask if it is anything like his dad’s model, but nobody’s outside the van. It’s like he vanished into—
Something cold touches your cheek.
“You scream, and I’ll ruin daddy’s ’ard work.”
Your eyes strain in their sockets to glimpse the tip of something black poking into your flesh, and your imagination fills in the rest. Your mouth dries, killing the screaming trapped at the base of your throat. You nod mechanically.
“Good girl. Now, give me the keys then keep your ‘ands where I can see ‘em.”
Sucking in a panicked breath, you slowly reach for the keys and blindly hand them over your shoulder. They disappear with a faint jingle.
“P-Please. You can have her. I’ll–I’ll get out, sit on the ground quietly, and you can drive off. I won’t fight o-or make a scene–“
“You won’t do either of those things, Blue,” he chuckles before stroking your temple with the tip of his gun. “Now. Turn the radio up so you can listen to your movie, then climb back here, carefully.”
You hesitate. Does he mean…?
“Between the seats. C’mon.”
Oh god.
“I’m not a patient man.”
“I’m sorry! I’m sorry!” You wheeze. You turn up the radio until it drowns out your thundering heartbeat and clumsily scramble into the back. You nearly trip, eyes widening to see that in his explorations, he’s converted the back seat into the sleeping configuration. He’s made the bed. 
He stands hunched in the narrow gap between the bed and the driver’s seat. Crammed into a space meant for a man seemingly half his size. The bed isn’t the only thing he’s changed, you notice. Gone is the medical mask. In its place is a crude, painted balaclava. It makes him look all the more terrifying as if he needs the boost to his image.
He gestures at your chest as you hover awkwardly behind the passenger seat, hands raised, trying not to fall onto the bed in the cramped space.
“Clothes off. Won’t say it twice this time, so get a move on. Sit if ya need to, but not a fuckin’ word.”
Tears spring to your eyes. Your cheeks burn as you comply, a sob catching in your throat when you glimpse him unbuckling his belt. This can’t be happening. This can’t be fucking happening. The fact it is happening at the drive-in, in the van, is a double whammy. The stranger’s going to obliterate two of your safe spots in one go.
He growls when you stand there in your bra and panties, hands clasping awkwardly at your front. 
“You stupid? Don’t make me repeat myself.”
Your bra tumbles down your shaking arms, and you kick it next to your clothes. As for your panties—he snatches them out of your hands before you can toss them. He brings them to his face, mashing them into the fabric covering his nose, and jerks his head in a silent but clear order.
He practically purrs when you climb onto the cheap, lumpy makeshift mattress. The upholstery is clean, you see to its maintenance, but it scratches at your palms and knees as you crawl.
“Look at that arse. Give it a wiggle, Blue.”
With the gun and his casual threat of ruining the interior with your interior, you pathetically comply. He belly laughs, louder than the revving of the motorcycles on screen. You try to ignore it, focusing on the interior handle of the van’s rear latch that’s a shuffle away. But as soon as you reach for it, a hand the width of a shovel wraps around your ankle and yanks.
“Where do you think you’re goin’?” He growls, easily overpowering your squirming, sobbing self. 
The fight you put up, if you could call it that, feeds the growing shame in your gut. It ends as quick as it began, with your panties jammed behind your teeth and wrists pinned. He hovers, breathing rough through his mask. He releases your hands with a cautionary squeeze.
“Try that again, and you’ll be joinin' your dad tonight. Simple enough?”
You nod so fast you crick your neck, tonguing fabric. 
With a patronizing pat to your cheek, he sits on his knees, head ducked and back curved, touching the roof. “That’s more like it.” His eyes linger on yours, assessing, then drop to your body, a soft, perverse laugh rattling out. Hedged with a smoker’s cough. 
It’s as surreal as the movie. Like you’ve been sucked beyond the silver screen. One minute, simply watching, the next, part of the nightmare.
Ghost, he tells you between sharp nips and bites to your tits, is what you’ll call him when you plead, beg, and whine. And that’s what you do, trading breaths for muffled whimpers as he paws at your belly, hips—whatever he can reach, which is everything. He leaves indentations of his teeth all the way down your body, stinging and raw.
“Nice cunt you’ve got ‘ere,” Ghost grins as if complimenting the upholstery or fixtures. He rolls and tucks his mask, revealing a pale chin and thin lips. You catch a couple of old, gnarly scars in the light filtering through the windshield. A knitted cleft. Helpful detail to identify him later, your hysterical mind notes. His lips twitch as he pries your legs open. “She’s fuckin’ soaked. Playin’ rough do it for you?”
Blunt thumbs rub circles into the soft skin at the crux of your inner thighs, teasing and pulling you open. He spits a large glob directly onto your hole. Either you’re not as soaked as he said, or worse, you think, he’s planting yet another little flag on your body. He plays with you for a moment, unskillfully toying with your clit, and stroking himself, spreading the drool from his leaking cock. He slaps the heft of it once, twice—then without further preamble, begins to shove his way in.
You can’t stop your hands from flying up to claw at his arms, your mouth falling further open in a silent scream, cotton tickling the back of your throat. The stretch is immense, and you feel like a bug the way your legs instinctively try to close, bracketing his broad form and pressing into his sides, from how you feel squashed as he bottoms out with a throaty groan.
Ghost rocks his hips to take whatever room’s left and chuckles at your wide eyes, glassed over with unshed tears. You stare up at the dark pits above, glinting with satisfaction. 
“Go ahead and cry. Been wonderin’ what you’d look like since you got all blubbery at the entry.” He picks up the pace and successfully knocks your tears loose as he fucks you hard into the mattress. The whole van must be rocking on its suspension, giving you a little hope a fellow movie-goer or an employee will investigate and scare him off. But there’s no way he doesn’t notice the sway of the van. He must not care.
“Please,” Ghost mocks. “Please, I ‘ave a ticket! It’s my stupid job and my stupid manager,” he laughs meanly, smacking into you to punctuate his speech. “These stupid ‘ours and stupid customers.” You wince at hearing your near-hysteric ranting and begging parroted back at you. “Ever think about what all those got in common? Ever think it’s you who might be stupid, Blue?”
He slips a hand back to your clit, thumbing it in tight circles broken by occasional flicks, coaxing a reluctant yet responsive heat like a skittish animal. His mask lifts more with a big smirk and a mean laugh as you choke around the gag, sobbing. 
“After all, you did let a strange man into your car.”
Your fingers dig into his arms but do nothing. He drops his weight, snakes his arm under your head, and ruts. His rubbing hurts. He uses way too much pressure than you normally like and pinches, muttering filthy orders into your ear. He kisses your drooling mouth and licks your cheeks. 
“C’mon, give me it, come on my cock. Want you nice and tight f’me, need you to keep it all inside.”
The inevitably of him finishing inside you chases another wail from your mouth. He finally slots his own over it, burrowing his tongue inside to dig around. You can barely breathe as he fucks you through whatever it is he’s doing. Your eyes spin and bounce off the fogged windows. Surely, any minute now, someone will interrupt, someone will save you. They’ll throw away their trash and hear your muted shrieking. 
And, as if summoned by thought alone, the beam of a flashlight bounces off the rear windows. Ghost pauses his mouth before his hips, slowing to a leisurely roll. He lifts his upper half to stare out the window as the light passes over the glass again. You watch, heartbeat borderline painful, and squeak when he raises his hand. His face snaps to you.
“Not a word.” He warns.
Ghost wipes the mist from the glass and his lip curls. 
“Just a kid.” A hand migrates over your mouth and presses, apparently not trusting you even with your underwear half-lodged behind your teeth. His other hand reaches and unlatches the window. You tense so hard in panic that he hisses and squeezes your cheeks with a second pointed look. He cranks the window open enough that surely his masked face is visible outside.
“Didn’t your mum teach you it’s not polite to stare?”
A pitchy, crackling voice of what sounds like a teenager responds. Fuck. You can hear him pretty clearly, even over the radio. He must be only a foot away. 
“I-I-I….W-Whatever it is you’re doing, sir, you can’t–”
“I’m enjoyin’ the show. At least I’m tryin’, but ‘ere’s some whelp stickin’ his nose in my business.” His voice is cruel, mocking. “I suggest you go back to your booth and forget about me. I can leave an impression if you’d like, but you like solid foods, yeah?” 
There’s a choked, scared sound that cuts through the film audio. It makes Ghost huff and drive deeper into your cunt, making you bite through cotton as his cockhead glances sharply into your cervix.
“Yes, sir. Sorry sir.” By the sound of his retreating footsteps, the kid’s power-walking away.
Ghost shuts and locks the window, muttering, and returns his attention to you. He gives you a toothy grin, flashing a silver cap on a rear molar. 
“Now, where was I?” 
A heartbeat passes before he’s back to fucking you mercilessly, tongue jamming into your mouth yet again.
He ignores the rake of your nails when you shove your hands up his shirt to find skin to ruin, and merely grunts as he lifts his head. Your underwear slides out of your mouth in his teeth, damp and wrinkled. He spits them out beside your head, then returns, wetting your dry tongue with his own.
Ghost swallows your shrill cry as you come and endures your kicking legs while flames as hot as hellfire sear you to the bone beneath him. The train whistle and screams pumping through the van’s speakers smother the rest of your bawling. You dangle above the abyss, spent.
It doesn’t take long for his orgasm to follow. Panting into your mouth, blown pupils fixed to yours, mouth screwed up in a sneer. He barely makes a sound as he loses his rhythm and floods your cunt. 
He withdraws after a brief eternity and kisses you. Exhausted, overwhelmed, and aching, you slip unconscious. Lost.
When you stir, you find yourself cuffed to the wall of the van, wearing only a hi-vis vest. It chafes your nipples as the van bounces along. Blinking, you groggily moan in pain and try to compute what it is you’re seeing through the lace curtains. Green. Patches of gray and white. Mountains. But the closest range is…
Your eyes whip up front, where Ghost fiddles with the dial. He pauses, registering your movement in the corner of his eye, and meets your gaze in the rearview. 
“Made a collector out of me, Bluebird.”
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ruruumin · 1 month ago
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i'll love you in every universe.
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₊˚ ᗢ modern au! alhaitham x hoyoverse! reader.
⤷ when you're his favorite video game character. - spoilers for honkai impact 3rd, houken gakuen 2, and honkai star rail.
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looking for a partner to co-op with, kaveh asked alhaitham to install honkai impact 3rd. at first, the man scoffed at him, reluctantly downloading it to play with his roommate. he would have never expected in a million years, that he would fall so deeply into the rabbit hole called hoyoverse. he stays up late into the night, tapping away on his phone to grind for materials to upgrade his most beloved character: you.
kaveh didn’t understand his strange fascination with you. he had passed on your banner but alhaitham on the other hand, would constantly pull for you no matter what. blame it on his financial freedom, he said. you only deserved the best after all. you had your signature five-star weapon and stigmatas. his entire team was based on maximizing your potential, and he was often known as “that guy who only played (name)” on online co-ops. 
his love for you was very quiet but his actions were loud.
he liked you a lot more than he bargained for. he made you his favorite character on the main screen, tapping your speech bubble to hear your voice lines. you had a very calm and relaxing tone. it was like music to his ears. and he finds that when life gets busy, all he wants to do is lay in bed and spend time with you in the miniature house he’s built. none of this made sense to his roommate. why would a brooding guy such as him, fall so enamored by a bubbly, joyous character like you?
your story mode was the most played-through for him. having started as just another side character to kiana’s journey, you became an integral part of the world. his heart wrenched every time he saw your lowest moments, even when he knew you’d prevail in the end, it kept him on the edge of his seat. he was devastated at first to hear you would be a villain in the later arcs. he didn’t want to fight against you. though, he ultimately would, to see you return to normal (he’ll go out of his way to completely avoid fighting you in weekly bosses). 
when you held out your hand to kiana, looking into the camera with enough warmth to melt the sun itself, he was happy kaveh asked him to play.
one regret alhaitham has is not being early enough to play houken gakuen 2, the predecessor of honkai impact 3rd. he only saw small snippets of your character in the final scene. you were holding onto kiana, the light in your eyes having faded in an instant before the world reset itself.
kaveh suggested he play genshin impact next, considering their world is interconnected with honkai impact. alhaitham would yet again scoff until he saw you in sumeru’s trailer. he couldn’t believe it. there was another you. your personality was a lot calmer and more reserved. more logical, he’d say. despite only being a scribe in this universe, you were a dendro character very closely connected to your archon and played a big role in overthrowing the corrupt sages. 
he was happy to know that your voice had stayed the same. your love for food also remained the same. it gave him jitters when you invited him (technically traveler) into your home. you weren’t the same person as you were in honkai impact 3rd, but you shared the same charm as your previous counterpart. some of the dry comments you had made him smile, like the time you left the traveler with a simple “see ya.”
he continued to grind for your ascension, building his team around you as usual. while you had less of a part in this game, seeing you return was more than enough for him. 
something he was very happy about was because of the popularity of genshin impact, there was much more merchandise for him to buy. after coming home from an exhibit, kaveh was gawking at the sheer size of his haul. from keychains, pins, and buttons, alhaitham bought every single one of your merch. his room was beginning to look less and less professional and more… interesting. it definitely had character. he had an acrylic stand of you beside his computer, with a large statue of your character displayed on his shelf.
kaveh would complain to tighnari and cyno about how you might as well be a third roommate, considering how often he had to see your face around the house. none of that would matter though, as long as alhaitham was less grumpy and going out to play games with him, he actually saw it as a good change. it felt like he got to know more about his roommate than he did beforehand. 
finally, when honkai star rail came out, kaveh didn’t even have to tell him to download it. alhaitham already had it on his devices and started playing before he did. he knew based on the name and hoyo’s previous games, he’ll see you again. and he wants to be more than prepared (with money) to bring you home.
and he’s still not sick of your character yet. his heart was leaping to his throat in the dead of night when you appeared in front of trailblazer during the penacony questline. holding out your hand for them to grab. you pulled them out of the rubble, patting them on the shoulder before pulling them to safety. this version of you was also different from the rest. still gentle and soft-hearted, but… sadder.
in this universe, you had lost kiana and many of your friends. turning to a life of solitude, you became more closed off. it took a lot more time for this version of you to finally open up to him. you talked about your journey before meeting trailblazer. having roamed various worlds until hearing about the express crew. the way you looked at archeon made him hopeful that there was still something between you and the other reincarnations. but you wouldn’t remember her. let alone realize you used to be friends in another game and universe. while tragic, he still wanted to give you the best as he always did. 
the same old tactic: he’ll build another team just for you. and he’ll continue to buy merchandise of you. from m.rage jackets that hung in his closet like a prized possession, to notepads and acrylic blocks. he was single-handedly saving the small business market by how much (name) merchandise he was buying off of every artist that drew you. 
kaveh had given up on complaining and succumbed a little to his antics. for example, on alhaitham’s birthday, he was gifted with a very comical cake with your character drawn on top of it. it gave him a good laugh that day.
in every single universe, whether it be from honkai impact, genshin, or star rail, you’ll always be his favorite character. 
… so when you appeared in his world, he was unprepared.
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outofconcheol · 2 months ago
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The Sun Also Rises (LMH x F!Reader)
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pairing: dancer!Minho x ballerina!reader (afab)
genres/au/rating: smut, fluff, some angst, strangers to lovers, travel au, 18+
summary: sometimes, one night is all it takes to change everything. and that's where Minho meets you.
warnings: pov switches, feelings of burnout and poor mental health discussed, alcohol, swearing, alcohol, kind of a language barrier (Minho can understand but is bad at speaking English), lots of tension, they're literally idiots I can't, Hyunjin being the voice of reason, Kento Yamazaki also makes a cameo (twinnn where have you been)
word count: 8k
a/n: consider this my early bday gift to me (and Minho), since both of our bdays are coming up in October. this is based on the film Before Sunrise. I'm very happy with how this fic turned out, it feels very me, so i hope you enjoy! thank you to Beezy @hobeemin for the lovely banner!
smut warnings under the cut!
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smut warnings: sexual tension abound, lots of kissing (too much for two people who just met), grinding, beach sex (be cautious when attempting irl), nipple play, fingering (f!receiving), pull-out method (again be cautious and wrap it before you tap it), cumshot
The night breeze rustles through the trees, and even though it's late, the city teems with life. Whispers can be heard around every corner, the clinking of wine glasses muddled with the sound of laughter. Minho’s stomach rumbles, the warm, spicy scent of paella wafting from somewhere nearby, and he remembers he hasn’t eaten since this morning.
For a brief moment, he misses the food back in Korea – the deep, earthy flavour of a steaming pot of doenjang jjigae from his eomma’s kitchen. He should really call his parents – they’d probably want to know how their son ended up lost and halfway across the world, stumbling through Gracìa on an empty stomach. 
To be fair, Minho didn’t even know himself. If he was Hyunjin, he could have said that he was attracted to the abstract, flowing architecture of Gaudì, and he wanted to study it. Maybe if he was Jeongin, he’d point to the numerous shops and boutiques that lined the streets of Barcelona, a fashion lover’s paradise. 
But he was Lee Minho –  a failed dance school drop-out, kicked out of his own crew because one day, the music had just stopped. And so did he, frozen in the middle of the routine, before he made a break for it and ran. The weak link in the chain. A note slightly out of tune. 
The discordance of it all didn’t escape him – being here in such an enchanting city, when inside it felt like he’d stumbled and stumbled until he wasn’t even sure if he’d ever be able to dance again. 
And he only had himself to blame.
The streets continue to wind, Minho’s sluggish feet under their spell, going wherever they lead. He remains a prisoner to his thoughts, the sights melding into a blur around him, until suddenly, he hears it. Around the corner.
Music.
And not just any kind – real music. The jovial sound of a live band, so different from the synthetic beats he was used to when it came to choreographing. His feet have a mind of their own, entranced and leading him straight to the source of the sound.
The scene he stumbles into is beyond what he could have imagined for this time of night – under a canopy of twinkling lights, were dancers. Dancers everywhere, twirling and prancing like they were out of a storybook, perfectly in tune with the music. 
Minho ducks behind a tree, his foot tapping in sync to the beat, and watches them dance, their toes skipping from right to left as they move back in forth in a circle. It’s beyond captivating, and he longs to join them. 
He wonders if they recognize him as one of them, or if he seems like just another plain tourist, happily enjoying the feeling of getting lost in a foreign city. 
The circle stalls, the music changing into a slower, more enthralling lilt, to signal the entry of someone new. Minho’s eyebrow quirks when the sea of people parts, the moon’s spotlight now on a solitary figure. 
His breath catches in his throat as he spots you – nimble movements a stark contrast to the rustic giddiness of the common crowd. He knows you must be classically trained – movements precise and ethereal, your meticulous form a stark contrast to the fluidity that surrounds you. He’s spellbound with the way you move – a vision of grace, so different from the swift, powerful movements he was used to executing, watching how the music takes hold of you, like you’re a marionette on strings, letting it lead you wherever you need to go.
Time ceases to exist the longer he watches, taken with the elegant lines of your body, a smile pulling at his lips. He’s so lost in his mind that he doesn’t notice when the music stops, until he feels the rustle of a figure next to him.
Minho turns in surprise, and tumbles backwards into the tree.
It’s you. The dancer.
Your doe eyes look up at him in concern, and it’s only then that Minho feels the sharp twang of pain from colliding with the sturdy trunk, rubbing gingerly at his shoulder.
“Are you always this clumsy?” Your lips curve in a lovely grin, and Minho feels his ears grow hot.
“I’m sorry, I’m new here, I didn’t…” he manages to choke out, too drawn in by the way your eyes sparkle with amusement and mischief.
“Sooo, should I call you New Here, or…” you trail off, and Minho pauses, a few silent breaths passing between you before he finally gets it. His name. You were asking for his name.
“Minho.”
“Ah. Minho. I’m ____.”
“You dance well,” Minho manages to blurt out. 
The words felt heavy on his tongue, like it’d been ages since he’d talked to someone unfamiliar, too caught up in his comfortable ways. His schedule had been simple. Eat, sleep, dance, repeat. And of course go home to feed the cats. But being here felt like challenging everything he’d known.
“You noticed?” You raise an eyebrow in question, and Minho can tell that you’re wondering whether he’s being genuine or saying it just to say it. You were probably used to it – fleeting tourists who flirted for a brief moment before disappearing into the night, too captivated by your beauty to act reasonably.
Maybe he was a fool then too.
“I dance as well. Not here though. Back home. It’s different,” he steps closer, heart warming when you don’t back away, honoured that he’s won your trust. Dance was a language he could always speak, no matter where he was in the world.
“Different isn’t always bad,” you reply, tilting your head curiously. “What do you dance?”
“Hip-hop,” he rambles, feeling his shyness dissipate when you tune in to the conversation. “It’s not like you, I mean you were–, wow, but I like to tell stories. When I dance.”
He feels himself grow warm at his stilted words, silently cursing the fact that he hadn’t taken Chan up on those English lessons when he’d met up with him for coffee last time. But he never imagined he’d be here.
Your smile only grows as you nod your head along with his words, understanding exactly what he meant.
“So, Minho, what brings you here? To Barcelona.”
Minho bristles, unsure how to answer the question. There were so many reasons, and you were a complete stranger. Did he dare reveal the truth?
“Here, I can be lost, I think,” Minho whispers, hoping you’ll know he means in more than ways than one. “Seoul is different. I think too much. The noise hurts.”
“I know exactly what you mean. I moved here six years ago, and sometimes it feels like I’m living inside a painting. It’s both magical and lonely sometimes.”
A flicker of relief washes over him. You understood him. Minho had been searching for so long for someone who understood – his friends could comfort him, but they didn’t really get it. The paralysis he felt. 
“You’re kind. Kind and good at dancing,” he grins shyly, bunny teeth poking through his lips.
“You’re good with words,” you tease back. “You should have been a writer instead.”
“Too late for that now,” Minho sighs, his entire figure slumping, and he watches you freeze. He wants to tell you it’s not your fault he feels this way, that you didn’t do anything, but the words remain clogged in his throat.
“Well it’s barely 10pm. I wouldn’t say it’s that late,” you say, voice filled with warmth, and Minho slowly comes back to himself, giving you a chuckle.
“Can I, you, we, go somewhere? Together?”
Minho watches you pause for a moment, scared that what he’d offered caused you to hesitate. But something about you made him want to keep talking to you, even if it was only for tonight.
“Sure, I’d love to.” He watches your eyes scrunch in enthusiasm. “I can show you some of my favourite places around the city.”
You beckon to him with a hand, gesturing to the shadowy streets. Minho gulped – this was the biggest risk he’d taken since being here, almost a risk as big as leaving Korea. But with the way you’d captured him from the very first moment he’d seen you tonight, he wondered if it might just be one that paid off.
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The night air hums with a new kind of energy as Minho follows you through the streets – whereas before, it all seemed a blur, now the city had truly come alive in his eyes. He peered through the windows of every building you passed, watching happy patrons laugh with each other, the heady buzz of alcohol in their veins.
Minho’s stomach only grumbles louder at the thought of booze, a pang of hunger hitting him. Embarrassed, he braces a hand around his stomach, hoping you haven’t caught on —
But you’re more perceptive than he gives you credit for, already turning around to face him.
“Okay, I definitely know where we need to go first,” you flick his arm, and Minho yelps at the surprising amount of force in the tiny jab. “You can’t dance on an empty stomach.”
Minho wants to tell you that he’d never planned on dancing at all, wasn’t even sure if he could anymore, but you’re forging ahead, on a mission.
A couple of blocks later, and Minho is hit with a tantalizing array of scents – the zing of freshly ground spices, the florality of fresh fruits, and the richness of cooked meats.
“Welcome to one of my favourite places in Barcelona,” you grin, gesturing to the wide variety of stalls laid out in front of you both. “Please take your pick.”
Minho knows exactly what he wants, heading straight for a stall serving paella. He’d passed too many damn places with the stuff already, he wasn’t going to miss out on it this time.
You following along, practically skipping with him, eyes alight with excitement.
Minho falters when the kind old gentleman running the stall greets him with an ¡hola!.
“I, uh, uno, por favor,” he stutters, ears burning with embarrassment. 
You step in, gracefully saving Minho from his shame, quickly tittering off a huge order to the stall owner, and Minho feels himself relax.
“He said it’ll take a little bit for the food,” you tell him. “Do you want to explore for a bit?”
Bobbing his head yes, Minho wishes he could so badly take your hand as you weave through the market. But he wasn’t sure if you’d find that overstepping. Whatever he felt, all he knew was that the night seemed endless in the best way, full of possibilities.
The loud voices of the vendors and the clanging of different pots meld together like s symphony in his head, and Minho feels his cold limbs fill up with warmth. Maybe, just maybe, he’d come out of this trip being able to dance again.
Out of the corner of his eye, Minho sees something that makes him stop in his tracks. He taps you on the shoulder, and your face falls with concern, but when you turn to see what he’s pointing at, your eyes light up again.
“Hola,” Minho approaches the flower stall more confidently this time. The fresh scent of many different blooms makes him think of his mother’s garden in Korea, full of mugunghwas. He sees the brilliant hue of a bouquet of red carnations, and silently puts up a finger, his eyes darting to you.
The lady running the stall understands him immediately, her eyes gleaming with excitement. She grabs one from the bunch, taking special care to trim the stem. Minho rummages around in his pocket for some spare change, handing the lady more than she probably charged him for, but his heart thuds as he turns around, holding the flower out.
“For you,” he says shyly. “You’re a good guide.”
He watches your lips part in a surprised oh!, and your entire face changes colour when he holds out the flower, suddenly becoming just as shy.
“Oh Minho, you shouldn’t have… thank you.”
You take the flower from him, thumbing at the soft petals and inhaling the sweet scent. You’d received hundreds of flowers in your lifetime, huge bouquets filled with every single kind you could think of, but somehow Minho’s humble gift of a single stem makes you feel the most special. Like he actually sees you.
The two of you remain there for a few moments, unable to follow the exchange with words, until you catch the lady from the stall eyeing you both curiously.
“I think… I think maybe we should go eat,” you finally manage to breathe out, breaking the haze of the exchange. You weren’t sure why it had been so charged, a still moment amidst the hectic market, but it felt like something you’d want to hold on to.
"___?” Minho looks at you, his voice soft. “I’m glad I came here. With you.”
You met his gaze, heart beating just a little faster. 
"Me too."
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Belly full, Minho follows you again through the city. Anyone looking at the two of you would think he was a little lost cat, following you around. But really, it was the opposite. Something about him made you want to stay with him. In your six years in the city, you hadn’t made very many friends. You chalked it up the the demanding nature of your job, saying you were always tired after dance practice and your feet were sore from wearing pointe shoes 85% of the time.
But you knew that was mostly an excuse. Right here, right now, it felt nice being with someone. Sharing things with someone. It only made you think of what would happen when the night would end, and Minho would leave, your loneliness welcoming you into the abyss once more.
Turning the corner, you spot it. The cozy bar was tucked away on a quiet street, its silence punctuated by the soft clinking of glasses.
Pushing the wooden door ajar, you lead Minho into the small, quaint space, filled with flickering candles and the scent of citrus and spices. The bartender sees you come in, waving a hand in greeting, and his grin only widens more when he sees Minho trail in behind you.
“Hello Kento,” you wave back, and Minho pauses again, studying the man across the bar.
“おはようございます (ohayu gozaimasu),” Minho’s low voice rumbles among the quiet din of the bar, and your jaw drops open in surprise. Minho does nothing but wink, moving to a quiet corner to pull out a chair for you.
Kento comes by to take your order, tempting you both with some of the fine-label vermouth he keeps under the bar, and you watch Minho quietly converse with him for a few moments, exchanging hushed words in Japanese.
His voice is pretty, you think. In another life maybe he could have been a singer.
“You’re full of surprises,” you tease him, watching him fidget with his napkin. 
“Tokyo is close by to Seoul,” he shrugs like it’s nothing. “And I like to watch animes.”
“Where did you come from Minho? Why haven’t we met before?” You give him a wide grin.
Minho becomes quiet, his handsome face marred by what seems to be a dark cloud.
“Leaving Korea was not my plan,” he manages to grunt. “I have things there. My cats. An apartment. Dancing.”
“So what made you do it?” The words slip out, and instantly you regret them, watching pain twinge on his face. You’d hit an unexpected nerve.
“I’m looking for something,” he admits. “I don’t know what it is. My friend Hyunjin told me about Barcelona.”
“Well I think we were always meant to meet then. Hyunjin sent you to me so I can help you,” you reach over, grabbing his hand within yours. Under the dim light you study it – muscled and with prominent veins. He had a dancer’s body for certain. “Us lonely dancers only have each other to rely on huh?”
“Dancing made me happy. I, uh, what’s the word, like clothes, they–” he stumbles through his thoughts, but you don’t need him to voice them.
“Fit. It makes you feel like you belong.”
“Not anymore.”
“Why?” you blurt out, instantly regretting it when he recoils. “I’m sorry Minho, I shouldn’t have asked.”
“No, no it’s okay.”
Kento swings by then, with two glasses of vermouth, rich, and slightly sweet with a hint of bitterness. Watching Minho knock back the alcohol, you see his body loosen up, instantly feeling the tension from the previous conversation melt away.
“Have you ever had a bad dance?” Minho asks, brown eyes glimmering with interest.
“Oh, many times,” you respond with a light laugh. “One time, when I just moved here, I slipped during a performance of Swan Lake in front of a huge crowd. I locked myself in my apartment for a week.”
Minho chuckles, but then leans in, like he’s genuinely concerned. “How did you recover?”
You know he’s probably talking about the smarting ankle you must have had, but you think he means more.
“I walked in the next week and continued dancing like nothing happened, But it took time to get over. The pressure to be perfect can be overwhelming sometimes.”
Minho nodded, understanding the weight of expectations when it came to doing what you both loved. 
“I want to let go,” he says, gaze softening. “But it’s hard.”
“I believe in you, Minho. You’ll find the music again.”
“For you, I’ll try,” he teases softly, but you can hear the hint of determination in his voice.
Your eyes met, and for a moment, the air between you crackled. You realize this entire time, you hadn’t let go of Minho’s hand. And he hadn’t made you either. Pulling him up with you, Minho yelps in surprise, barely having a second to wave goodbye to Kento before you’re dragging him through the door, back out into the cold night.
“I think I know something that may help.”
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Buzzing from the alcohol, you drag Minho deeper into the neighbourhood, the glow of the streetlights casting a warm golden hue over the cobblestones. 
Heat radiates from where his palm meets yours, a soft breeze helping to calm the racing of your heart. Eventually, you hear it – the echo of a faint tune reverberating from the nearby buildings, and you know you’re almost there. A group of street musicians come into view, their lively jig fading away to a slower, more sensual melody.
“You’ve been talking this entire time about being bad at dancing, but I haven’t seen you actually do it,” You giggle, eyes gleaming with mischief. You take a few steps towards the middle of the square, beckoning Minho with a playful grin. “Come on.”
You watch Minho stall, and your heart races, thinking maybe you messed up. Maybe it was too soon for him, maybe he was scared and didn’t want to try again.
“Here? In front of everyone?” he replied, chewing nervously at his lip. 
“Why not?” you challenge. “Forget everyone else. It’s just you and me. Two people who love to dance.” 
You squeeze Minho’s hand in yours, squealing in shock when he pulls you close to him, arm wrapping around your waist. Leaning into his chest, you inhale his warm, woody scent, feeling yourself shiver.
“Okay,” he sighs. “But don’t think badly of me.”
“I could never,” you whisper into his neck.
Minho chuckles at that, stepping back to dramatically bow, before sweeping you into his arms once more. You move into the open space of the plaza, surrendering to the rhythm as the notes of the music envelope you both. Pressing lightly into Minho, your hand comes to rest in the soft hair at the nape of his neck.
“Tell me more about you,” you breathe against his lips. “I want to know.”
“My cats, they’re called Soonie, Doongie and Dori, they live with me in my apartment,” he smiles, pride taking over his expression when he thinks of them. “You?”
You twirl free from him, dress flaring for a moment,, then spin back, hand finding his once more.
“My mother was a ballet dancer. She hurt herself when I was young and could never dance again. It’s why I chose to follow her,” you admit, finally letting yourself break free from the walls you’d built.
You let your arms float gracefully above your head, marveling at the way you and Minho moved together. His movements  were fluid and free, a sharp contrast to your precision, bodies weaving together like the finest tapestry. The air between you crackled, the pull between you like two halves of a magnet.
“You’re beautiful,” Minho says, his gaze intense as it meets your eyes, then travels, to your lips, down your neck, even further. You feel a throb between your legs, sparks erupting across your skin everywhere he touched. 
The heat between you was palpable, an electric current that seemed to pulse with every beat of the music. The world no longer felt as big or scary anymore, narrowed down to the two of you, everything else fading into the background. 
Suddenly, the scene around you spins, and you’re looking up at the stars, Minho’s face hovering above yours. You lean in, lips ghost against his jaw.
“Am I distracting you, Minho?” His breath caught at your query, and he sighs, drinking in the subtle scent of your skin.
You gasp when he spins you around, back meeting his front. Shivers run up your spine when he leans in, chuckling in your ear.
“Yes, but I like it,” he groans, low voice ringing in your ears, and everything around you fades as you begin to move together. Hips swaying side to side, Minho’s palms settle below your waist, so close to where you need him, and you whine softly. Even though you’re turned away, you can feel his smirk in your ear, and it all feels like it’s too much. Yet you don’t want it to stop.
The haze lifts with one particular thrust of his hips into you. A small moan leaves your mouth, and everything clears, and your heart begins to race. Shakily, your eyes meet Minho’s, surprised to find them blown out in deep pools of lust.
Minho’s shaking fingers cup the line of your jaw, his lips pressing against yours. You comd your fingers through his hair, sighing against him, finally giving in. He kisses you first with the utmost gentleness, pulling back to search your eyes for anything wrong.
Despite the chill in the night air, you’ve never felt warmer.
When you nod no, Minho leans in again, his previous gentleness giving way to hunger, the tip of his tongue gliding past your lower lip, sighing at your taste. You feel like you’ll keel over if he’s not holding you, all the blood in your body rushing away from your head.
When he finally pulls away, breathless and wide-eyed, you feel your words clogged in the back of your throat.
“I-,” you struggle, seeking brief respite from the emotions coursing through you, but not wanting the moment to end.
“I didn’t expect this night to turn out like this,” you admit, voice barely above a whisper, filled with awe.
“I’m glad it did,” Minho replied. 
Looking around, you realize the music had long stopped, the band dispersing, no sign that they were even there to witness you and Minho’s dance.
“Do you have to go?” Minho asks, and his voice sounds impossibly small, like he’s afraid to know the answer.
You pause. So much waited for you ahead – performances, errands, the struggles of daily life in a foreign city. But you decided that right now, you had more than enough time to leave that behind. 
Shaking your head, you nod no, air swirling with the thrill of the unexpected. And you were ready to embrace whatever came next.
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Minho feels the breeze ruffle his hair, and lets his eyes close, shoulders sighing in relief. The lapping of the waves against the shore becomes even louder, the sound of traffic and other people fading away. The sand squishes in between his toes, and he lies back on his jacket, looking straight up at the stars.  For the first time since he’d left Seoul, Minho felt completely at peace. Whereas uncertainty scared him before, now he completely welcomed the unknown. After all, it was what had lead him to you.
Minho feels his body heat when he thinks of you two dancing in the square, your face looking up at his, the feeling of your soft lips. It’d been so long since he was last with someone – dance always took over his life, leaving little time for love. But he thinks that maybe he’d been going about it all wrong.
He feels a tap on his shoulder, and he turns to see you lying right next to him on top of your coat. He can feel the warmth radiating from you, your hair tousled by the sea breeze and flying in the wind.
He really wants to kiss you again.
The two of you sit in silence for a moment, letting the rhythmic crash of waves fill in for the unspoken words in between you.
“Hey,” you interrupt the quiet with a whisper, like you’re afraid to shatter the serenity of this moment.
“Hey,” Minho says back, reaching over to brush a stray strand of hair out of your eyes. His fingers linger a little too long on your cheekbone before he drops it.
You stare at him, swirling patterns in the sand between you.
“I get it, you know. How you feel. I feel it every day when I dance. Ballet is beautiful, but it’s also... constricting,” you sigh. “Sometimes I just want to be free – free to dance, to live, to love.”
Minho nods, feeling a lump in his throat. 
“I also want that. But I’m scared. What if I’m free and I’m still not happy?”
There’s a flicker of vulnerability in his eyes, a rawness in his voice. 
“I think happiness finds you when you least expect it,” you say gently, your voice like a gentle pat on the back.
Minho had never expected you at all. But he was glad you were here anyway.
“Can I kiss you?” He manages to choke out, heart racing as he takes in the way the moonlight casts shadows against the curve of your jaw and the softness of your lips. The urge to touch you again felt almost unbearable.
The space between you vanishes, and Minho sees you smile, leaning in closer, and his heart thuds in his chest. He reaches out again, pulling you towards him.
Your lips meet softly, shy and tentative compared to the way he kissed you in the square. It’s as gentle as the lulling of the waves, and Minho feels the world fade away, only able to register the cold sand underneath him, and you. 
As you broke apart, breathless, Minho sees you search his face. 
“What’s on your mind, Minho?”
Minho knows he’s always been pretty poor with words. Chan was the lyrical one in the friend group. Where Minho thrived, and always had, was action. So he decides to show you.
. . . 
Minho leans in again, capturing your lips with a fierce urgency, releasing a euphoric sigh into your mouth. Not wanting to push more than you’re comfortable, he wants for you to respond, fingers carding into his hair, pulling slightly at the strands, warmth blossoming in his chest.
You wonders if he knows you can feel the rapid beat of his heart, his pulse point right there below your fingertips, and you reach for his hand. 
“I want you,” Minho finally manages to say. The words are strained, like he’s been holding them back for too long. 
“I thought it was just me this entire time,” your own voice cracks.” I thought you were just being nice.” 
Because the truth was, you’d wanted him the very first moment you saw him. He may have thought little of himself, but he was a vision in your eyes. A masterpiece to be admired, a person to be cherished.
Minho pulls you into him, body meshing with yours, until you can no longer tell where he ends and you begin. You gasp when you feel his hardness underneath his jeans.
“I am not just nice,” he smiles against your lips. His hands cradle your face, before reaching his arms behind you, fingers ghosting down the the curve of your spine. 
Kicking your shoes off, you feel his fingers run up and under your skirt, skimming against your bare legs and he your breath hitch, chest rising and falling in the pale light of the moon. 
Lips falling to your neck, he inhales your sweet jasmine scent, teeth grazing lightly against the soft skin. You whine into his mouth, hands fisting at the edge of his shirt, struggling to pull it over his head. He slides over you, using one hand to pin both arms behind you, reaching over with the other to slide your your dress down to your stomach, finally peeling it off, and you lie back, eyes alight with desire as you take him in.
The clink of his belt rings in your ears as both your clothes finally finish falling away, and desire pools between your legs. Sliding up against your warm coat, you spread your legs for him, a low hum escaping his parted lips at your messy arousal gleaming on your thighs in the low light. Trailing his eyes back up to your lips, he inches towards you, his breath tickling your bare skin as he leaves kisses on your jaw, your collarbone, in between your breasts. The veins in his arms bulge as his hands come up to cup both your breasts, rubbing your nipples between his fingers until they stiffen, and you let out a soft moan.
The teasing doesn’t stop, his lips enclosing over the hardened buds, messily sucking on them. While it felt amazing, you knew the sun would rise soon, and the time you had with each other was limited. You trap his hand in yours, guiding it to your throbbing clit. He nudges your legs, coaxing you to spread them further, before plunging a finger inside your wet heat, sliding it in and out. Your breath comes out in sharp gasps, your pleas for more being answered swiftly as he slides a second one in, laying his head on your stomach as more and more of your arousal coats his fingers. You mewl, unable to contain your volume as you swallow them deeper, loving the rough drag against your slick walls. His thumb grazes your clit, rubbing it in slow, delicate circles before speeding up, rubbing faster, and his grunts of determination are what push you over the edge as you come.
Breath leaving you in heavy pants, your lips find his desperately, and he teases you with his tongue, his hard cock rubbing up against your wet entrance. You gasp when he pushes in, and he pauses, wondering if it’s too much, but you nod, letting him know it’s okay. He thrusts shallowly, before pushing in all the way, watching you squirm underneath him while rutting your hips.
“Fuck,” he sighs, pushing his cock in deeper, bucking his hips against yours as your nails dig into his back. “You feel so good.”
“Oh my god, Minho, I can’t–, it’s too much,” you groan, rocking against him in an attempt to quell the burning in between your thighs..
“That’s it,” he grunts, trapping your clit in between his fingers, rubbing tight circles until you snap, seeking his lips once again, your orgasm flooding your entire body like a wave. Minho speeds up his thrusts to join you, groaning when he feels himself explode, pulling out and jerking himself off, white ropes of cum splashing against his toned stomach and onto your  stomach before slumping against you.
You can feel his his chest heave with the weight of his breaths, your sticky bodies curled around each other. You begin to shiver from the breeze, and Minho cradles your sticky body in his arms, brushing the damp strands of your hair from your face before pressing a kiss to your shoulder.
“가지마, 나랑 같이 있어 (gajima, narang gatchi isseo)” he whispers against your cheek. You don’t know what the words mean, but you hold them close anyway.
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When the first light of dawn washes over the beach, orange and pink and purple poking out from between the clouds, you both know it’s time. It’s hushed – an eerie silence falling in between you and Minho as you scramble to throw your layers back on, the sticky feeling between your thighs a reminder that it hadn’t all just been a dream. 
From the corner of your eye, you see Minho hum absentmindedly to himself, running his fingers through his hair to tame the messy strands, and your heart lurches. 
The silence remains as you bid the sea farewell, the familiar streets of the city you called home greeting you once more. Only this time, you felt like a stranger, unsure of where your relationship stood. You supposed the same could be said for the man next to you.
It takes a few short moments before you’re seated at a café, stirring your coffee pensively. The rich, bitter aroma mixes with the salt from the sea that sticks to your clothes, and you feel nauseous. Across from you, Minho was gazing out at the horizon, his expression pensive.
You knew it was only supposed to be temporary. One of those single brief moments where two strangers met each other, eventually passing like ships in the night, both of them holding onto the memory forever. So why did it hurt so much?
“Are you ready to go back to work?” Minho asked, his voice warm and gentle, snapping you from your thoughts.
“Yeah,” you replied, forcing a smile. “I’ve been rehearsing for weeks. But…” 
You hesitate, heart feeling heavy.
“I know,” Minho finishes your thought. “It feels different this time.”
“I love ballet, I really do,” you continue, voice barely above a whisper. “But dancing isn’t my whole life. I think I’m just like you Minho. I’ve been searching for something real, something that goes beyond the stage.”
You watch Minho’s face twist, like he wants to say something, and you already know he would have asked you if you’d found it. Because he’d been searching for the same thing. It felt so cruel to have it ripped from your grasp the moment the sun began to rise.
You shared a moment of silence, the weight of everything hanging between you. You took a sip of your coffee, but instead of calming you, the warm liquid only makes your heart race.
“What are you going to do?” You asked Minho, watching his face jump to meet your gaze. “After tonight?”
“Go back to Seoul,” Minho struggles to keep his voice steady. “Maybe take a break from dance, to try something new.”
“Do it,” you encouraged, voice wobbling. “You owe it to yourself to explore what brings you joy. Don’t let fear hold you back.”
The café soon begins to fill with the clink of dishes, the laughter of patrons, the aroma of freshly baked pastries. It felt surreal, almost like a scene from a movie.
Minho reached across the table, his hand covering yours. “Thank you ___. For everything. I wish I knew how to say more.”
You squeezed his hand gently, eyes glistening. “You don’t have to say anything. Just promise you won’t forget this.”
You won’t forget me.
While you and Minho labour through finishing your breakfast, the clock behind you continues ticking, each passing second a reminder that time was running out.
By the time you leave, the sun has fully risen, casting a warm glow over the cobblestone streets. Walking side by side, you travel deeper into the city, the streets blurring into each other until you come upon a familiar one. The one that leads to your apartment. It was over. 
“What did it mean?” you ask him, voice tinged with sadness. “What you said on the beach?”
Minho’s smooth voice had lingered in the back of your mind all morning, and you wished you knew Korean, that you could say something back to him. Like he’d tried for you.
Minho looked at you, a hint of a smile on his lips, though his eyes were clouded with emotion.
“I can’t tell.”
Both of you knew it was because it might change everything.
You falter, wondering if you should say something, make a promise to keep in touch, to meet again. But it seems so useless, knowing Minho would probably never come back, and you’d never scrap together the time or money to fly to his side of the world.
You settle for throwing your arms around him, wrapping him in a tight embrace. You bury your head into his neck, committing his familiar scent to memory, wishing it could last forever.
When you pull away, you’re already backing down the street, Minho’s somber expression looking after you.
“I guess this is it,” you said, voice trembling slightly.
Minho nodded, a bittersweet smile on his lips. 
“Take care of yourself, ___.”
The knot in your stomach only grows tighter when you see him step away, tears pricking your eyes. With one last lingering look, he turned and walked away, the sunlight catching in his hair.
As he turned the corner, you whispered a silent wish to the rising sun, that no matter what happened, that Minho would be happy. And that if he was, maybe you could be too.
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Adjusting your pointe shoes, the soft strains of music fill the air. You stand on your tip toes, gazing at your reflection in the mirror. What looks back at you looks the same as it always has – perfect form, straight posture, the picture of elegance. But only you know there’s something different now, a wild longing in your heart.
It had been months since that one night with Minho, but he’d never left your mind. Somehow, even though he was oceans away, his ghost trailed after you everywhere you went. When you spun, you could almost feel his hands around your waist, guiding you in a duet. When you came home to your apartment, you wished he was there, the two of you laughing over a cup of coffee. Every time you smelled the ocean breeze, you remembered his lips meeting yours, bodies tangled together in the sand.
He was everywhere and nowhere to be found, all at once.
When practice ends, you chat with your fellow dancers, wishing them a swift goodbye before running out the door.
When the longing built to its worst, you always knew where to go, the warmth of Kento’s bar waiting for you at the end of another rough day. Before, he would tease you, asking where your “special friend who spoke good Japanese” was, but now he only slides a matcha in your direction, his eyes sad while he chuckles about how you needed to cut back on the vermouth.
In a daze, you scroll through your phone, heart dropping when you realized there were no photos of Minho in your phone. The date remained a figment of your memory, like he’d never existed at all. And you had nothing to look back on.
Tears prick your eyes when you realize how stupid you’d been. So caught up in the moment that you hadn’t even thought of asking for his number, or any contact information. There were a million people named  “Minho” from Seoul to wade through every time you opened social media to check.
You wondered if Minho thought of you as often as you thought of him. What was he doing now? Was he happy?
Sighing heavily, you decide you’ll probably never know the answer.
Until your phone buzzes.
. . .
Minho sighs deeply, his muscles aching from another grueling day in the studio. He feels Soonie brush against his feet, his oldest friend curling up into a ball at his feet, and he reaches down to scratch between his ears. Looking out over the balcony, the twinkling city lights of Seoul gleam back at him, but his thoughts are full of another place. And another person. 
No matter how much he immersed himself in his routine—classes, rehearsals, and performances—something felt off. His friends would joke about his trip, saying he’d come back a changed man, like a monk who’d found enlightenment, but his serious expression always shut them down. 
He hears footsteps on the balcony behind him, and Hyunjin comes to sit next to him, holding out a steaming cup of noodles in his hands.
“Eat hyung,” he scolds Minho. “You have to be exhausted from practice today.”
Minho accepts the cup, picking up a few with his chopsticks, but decides he can’t stomach them, staring absently at the cup.
“Hyung, I don’t mean to pry, but,” Hyunjin sounds unsure, like he’s poking a sleeping dragon. “What happened in Barcelona?”
Minho shoots up at Hyunjin’s perceptive question, knowing his pabo face was terrible at hiding things. Especially from his best friend. 
Whereas Minho struggled to find the words with you, they all came flooding out in front of Hyunjin, recalling everything from the moment he saw you to how you continued to linger in his mind even now. How he couldn’t shake you no matter how hard he tried.
Hyunjin listens along, nodding his head in understanding, and finally leans back, brushing a hand over Soonie’s fur.
“Hyung, I know you’re stupid, but like, have you ever thought about just reaching out? Why are you torturing yourself like this?”
“Hyunjin-ah,” Minho pinches the bridge of his nose. “You don’t understand, it’s–”
“Complicated? What is so complicated about it? You like her. It sounds like she likes you. Why waste time on the what-ifs?”
Hyunjin pats him on the back, saying that if the weekend rolls around and Minho doesn’t have an update for him, he’ll threaten to air-fry him.
Minho sighs, taking a deep breath. He pulls out his phone and opens Instagram, thumb hovering over your username. He’d found you right after he’d left of course, easily putting your name and Barcelona together. But he’d never been able to take the final leap to reach out, to build on whatever had started that night.
But now, he decides he’s done wasting time.
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When Minho steps off the plane, the air in Barcelona is thick with the smell of orange blossoms and the distant strumming of Spanish guitar. It had only taken a few messages back and forth for you two to fall into the same easy rhythm. Hyunjin teased him for constantly checking his phone for notifications from you, but deep down, he knew that his friends wanted him to chase whatever made him happy.
It hadn’t taken much longer for him to decide to decide to book a flight, seeing an ad for the ballet troupe’s latest performance on your Instagram story. Now, as he watches the streets pass by in the cab, he feels like he might be nauseous, wondering if he’d made the right choice.
But then he thinks back to how one night hand changed everything, and decides that you’re a chance worth taking. 
When he arrives at the performance hall, Minho ducks by the crowd, slipping into the plush velvet seat. Around him, the audience buzzes with excitement, but Minho pays them no mind, his eyes trained on the stage, dark for now.
When the lights go down and the curtains draw back, Minho has to hold in his breath. It was exactly like the first time.
You, in your silver and white costume, gliding across the stage like a wisp of smoke, letting the music lead you wherever you needed to go. Your performance cries with unspoken passion and longing and Minho wonders if all this time, you’ve felt the same way, unable to let him go like he had with you.
Minho doesn’t know if minutes or hours pass before the music finally stops, but he pushes his way through the audience, moving against the crowd to find the backstage exit. To find you.
. . .
“I’m sorry sir, you can’t come back here, this is only for performers…” 
The security guard’s voice booms at the door to the dressing room, and Sakura, your fellow dancer, nudges you, rolling her eyes. A laugh bubbles in your throat, wondering what crazy person had made their way backstage, but then you hear it.
A voice that stops you in your tracks. One you thought you’d never hear again.
“Please, I just need to –, please,” it begs, and you’re up out of your chair before you can even stop yourself.
Pushing past the guard, your eyes widen in disbelief when you see Minho outside. He looks different now, hair longer, and maybe the colour had changed, but the real difference is in his eyes. No longer empty, they light up when they see you.
“Minho?” You whisper, unable to believe that it’s actually real. That he’s actually here.
“Surprise,” he grins, taking a step towards you.
The security guard eyes you both suspiciously, Minho in his long trench and crisp pressed slacks, and you in your sweats, the remnants of your shimmery makeup still lingering on your face, before he slips away.
“What are you doing here?”
“가지마, 나랑 같이 있어 (gajima, narang gatchi isseo). It means that I want you to stay together with me,” he admitted, voice steady despite the whirlwind of emotions churning inside you both. 
Tears of happiness shimmered in your eyes as you moved closer, closing the distance between you two. 
“I thought you were just being nice,” you joke, but it comes out a sob.
Minho took your hands in his, and you feel the warmth radiate from his skin. 
“I am not just nice,” he smiles, reaching over to thumb away a stray tear rolling down your cheek. His lips fill the spot where the tear had once been.
“Come with me,” he whispers against your temple. “I have to show you something.”
. . .
Hand in hand, the cobblestone streets of Barcelona greet you both once more, only this time, everything had changed.
Minho comes to a pause right then, feeling the weight that he’d been shouldering for months finally lift from his shoulder now that he had you in his arms again.
“Do you remember this place?” he asked.
You looked around, a smile spreading across your face as recognition dawned. “This is where we danced that night.”
“Will you dance with me again?,” he poses, his chest  filled with fear and trepidation, but also hope.
You take a step back, sinking into a deep bow in front of him. Minho grins, catchind your hand to spin you back towards him. The world around you faded as you began to move together, time stopping for the both of you.
As he slowed, breathless and beaming, he feels you burrow into the crook of his neck., whispering against his skin.
“Am I distracting you Minho?”
Minho tilts his chin up to meet your gaze, a smirk pulling at his lips.
“Yes, but I like it,” he breathes, closing the gap to crash his lips against yours. “I like you.”
“I like you too, Minho.”
The sun would rise again tomorrow. But this time, you’d be by his side.
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a/n pt. 2: this reminds me of Collision!Minho a bit, they're like two sides of the same coin haha. As always, any feedback or comments are much appreciated, but I appreciate you all anyway. Lots of love, Isi 💜
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ldysmfrst · 5 months ago
Text
American Mate (9) - Shadows of the Past (M)
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Paring: Hybrid!BTS Ot7 x Plus-sized Human FemReader
Status: Ongoing series
Chapter number: 9 of unknown
Word count for Chapter: 10,612
Work count for Story: 53,505
Genre: Hybrid Playmate Au inspired by works created by @yoongiofmine
A little about the author: I am a mother of two beautiful children, one of whom has special needs and the other loves everyone. I currently am not working because of a broken foot. I started a Patreon, and I would be grateful if you donated to help me make ends meet while I am out of work.
Warnings: (I am not good at this, but I will try. Let me know if I missed anything!!) NOT BETA READ!! This story will have a bit of angst, fluff, smut, f/m, m/m, and m/f/m. This chapter does have pack dynamics, comfort, Alpha Space, Luna vibes, close proximity, multiple scenting, M/M mature scenes, good boy, and feisty Beta vibes.
SIDE NOTE: This is my first time writing second-base smut into a story. 💜💜💜
This chapter has a mature scene between BTS members. If you want to avoid this scene, at the start and end of the spicy part of the scene, the following banner will be displayed:
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BTS HYBRID ANIMAL TYPES: Seokjin - Roan Ferret, Yoongi - Black Jaguar, Hoseok - Marten, Namjoon - Alaskan Timber Wolf, Jimin - Red Panda, Taehyung - White Southwest African Tiger, Jungkook - Flemish Giant Rabbit
AMERICAN MATE MASTER LIST / LDYSMFRST MASTER LIST
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“Genevie Rose Elisey.” You growl out her name, step forward, and pull out of Yoongi’s tail. All eyes snap to you—well, all eyes except the little omega, who drops her eyes and scrunches her nose at the twist of your scent. 
You stalk forward and grip the back of her neck as if she were a kitten, scruffing her. Your scent has gone from sweet pea to something akin to lemons, almost acidic. The change in scent alerts your pack that you are not playing around.
However, the scent and display of Dominance causes a mix of reactions from the Alphas. Everyone here would be remiss in not recognizing who is currently in charge, and that does something to them.
Namjoon and the rest have seen you upset, but this… this is something else. While he is concerned for the Omega, not knowing what she had done to result in this type of reaction from you, he cannot pull his eyes away from how you hold yourself. It’s like you are taller and more assertive. 
Yoongi’s Alpha slams to the forefront when he sees you scruff the Omega. The feline mothering behaviors pull deeply at the primal aspect of the jaguar hybrid. His mind runs with thoughts of you scruffing cubs, but not just any cubs, his cubs. Shaking his head, Yoongi does his best to clear his mind and stay in the present; you are not his—yet.
Jimin is just lost. He has spent the least amount of time with you out of the pack. He has mostly been observing you and your interactions with his already-bonded mates. This Dominant, in-charge side of you is new and instinctively intriguing.
“Luna, I only meant to ensure they understood,” Evie says softly, trying not to offend you further. When the hybrid pack title is used, the three Alphas exchange glances of shock before settling their sights on you.
“It is not your place to remind others of something that happened when you were not present. In private, between our pack members, you can defend, rant, rave, and threaten all you want to,” you look to Derek.
“Both of you have always been able to protect the pack in emergencies and express yourselves freely in the pack house. However, I feel that you both may have lost where the line of respect is when it comes to individuals outside of the pack who hold importance. You both realize that these three Alphas hold the key to my survival?”
“Luna, we do. Honest, we meant only to support our pack and defend you, our Luna, in your territory.” Derek says, bearing more of his neck in submission as the acidic smell consumes your sweetness.
Gesturing to the Alphas in the room, “If any of these three or their mates are offended…”
“One word,” your voice drops deep and gravelly.  “One word is all it takes from either one of you, from me, and your Luna would be without a job, a home. Then where would we be?”
Once your words are spoken, it takes a breath for both family pack members to shrink farther down in submission. Neither one had considered that you could be fired for something they did or didn’t do.
That is why you are the pack’s Luna. While your Beta and Omega have to deal with customers or clients that are Alphas, they only have to deal with them in short amounts of time. 
Your contract with the Bantang Pack was not going to be short. Realizing that they need to treat the other pack as a pack, not a customer, dawns on them. 
More than ever, Derek wishes he understood why the Bantang Pack took this path with you rather than the typical courting method. Maybe one day, he can find out.
“You will not threaten Alpha guests or ANY guest in our pack house. I know you are protective of me, both of you are, but I am an adult and the Luna of this pack,” you move closer to the munchkin hybrid. 
“Thank you for your kind, yet oversharing words, Omega. But you need to apologize to them for planning to neuter them.” 
“Luna Y/n,” Jimin calls your attention quickly. The sound of him using your family pack titles pulls at something profound and instinctual within you.
“I think Your Omega is right, Luna,” says Jimin softly. “I think she is right about a few things.”
He pauses to collect his thoughts, which are running everywhere now that he has watched your eyes darken as you correct the misstep of your pack member and dilate at the use of the Luna title. 
His Alpha coming forward for the first time since he has been in your presence. He is watching you closely and is keenly interested.
“Respectfully, Luna, we are starting a mile behind because we never saw you coming. Not everyone in Bangtan Pack has connected to our Miss y/n in the same way, which is no one's fault. It means that some of us, mainly myself, have a lot more than a mile to get things right.”
“Jimin, you really...” You are cut off when Jimin gently takes your free hand and pulls you towards him. Dropping the scruff on the munchkin hybrid, she backs away and curls into the beta.
“Let me finish, Luna, please.” You nod, breath caught in your throat. “This whole situation, mates– playmates, came in an odd way, and we really should do things right by you.”
Taking your other hand, he says, “I want to do things right by you. I want to do the right things with you. I know you can’t smell our scents, but we meant what we said last night.”
“We all want to do things right by you, Princess,” says Yoongi.
“Miss Y/n, I came here for a reason,” Jimin says as his thumbs rub gently over your knuckles. 
“I wanted to meet your family pack and reassure them that we are going to treat you right, take care of you like one of our own, spoil you silly, and support you endlessly,” he says shyly.
Quickly glancing at Namjoon, Jimin focuses back on you, “Each mate wants to spend a day with you—just you. We will take time with you so that we can learn who you are and show you who we really are.”
Your eyes are glassy, and your scent is losing some of the acid as he continues, “Will you grant us the honor to take you out? Allow us the pleasure of getting to know each other on a personal level, Luna?”
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Once you agreed to the outings with the Bangtan pack, Evie brought out the cookies. Of course, while she was feisty, her Omegan side always wanted what she called poofy scents around. Her cookies never failed to lighten the mood.
Namjoon and Evie stood in the kitchen. Evie cleaned up from baking the cookies, and Namjoon avoided everything as much as he could. This seemed to amuse Evie to no end. No animosity could be seen or smelt between the two.
Jimin took the time to speak with Derek while sitting on my bed. You were pretty sure that they were practically interviewing each other. That or Jimin was trying to learn more about you through the beta. Derek looked like he was having a serious conversation and was concerned about what he was saying.
You had gone out onto the small balcony to get some fresh air. Emotions running amok:
The shock of the unexpected guests. 
The embarrassment of Evie’s declarations.
The fear of retaliation from the Alphas for those same words. 
The flutters of your heart at the reorganization of your status by Jimin. The ease of the kind words of the Alphas.
“Is there a reason why the pack Luna has come outside?”
“Yoongi,” you breathe out, trying to suppress a shudder at the use of your pack titles again. “I am sorting myself. So much has happened this week. I am not sure it has sunk in yet.”
Walking up behind you, he grips the railing on each side of you. Effectively caging you in. Resting his chin on your shoulder, breathing in your scent as it has settled back into sweet pea and vanilla.
“Is there anything that can help?” he asks quietly.
“You three are not offended by Evie's words, right? Or by how I acted, even though I am not a hybrid?” You say, still looking over the street below.
A gentle scoff is heard: “Your feisty Omega thinks highly of her Luna, and Your Beta does as well. I am not sure you remember everything from the breakroom, but Your Beta expressed similar concerns to us then. Your pack is concerned for you.”
You chuckle softly, “Yes, that they are. They always have been. I feel like I am letting them down with my issues. Like I am not strong enough for the position they have given me.”
“They wouldn’t be able to follow you as their Luna if they didn’t trust you to lead them. Now, as far as your actions.” Yoongi’s voice deepens. 
His nose runs along the shell of your ear, leaving hot puffs as he breathes, “Your actions were a sight to see, Luna.”
Stepping closer to you, his hands resting on your hips and making your back flush with his front. His heat pours into you as you feel yourself relax slowly into him. 
“So, seeing a human do that wasn't offensive?”
“Offensive is not the word I would use for it.” Yoongi sounds amused as he raises his hand, trailing it along your body, lightly covering your throat to grip your chin. 
Turning your face to his, he lets out a purr that vibrates your whole body. His nose runs along yours. “Intriguing, captivating, alluring would be better words to describe how your actions made us feel.”
He scents your cheek with his as he whispers in your ear, “Did you think scruffing the young Omega would do nothing for my Alpha, Princess?”
Your breath becomes difficult as your body lightly shudders at his words. Your mind runs scenarios through your head. Yoongi’s lips on your neck, or his teeth leaving marks on your skin. Fighting your reaction the best you can, nails digging into your palm.
You want to lean into his touch more than you already have, but your mind screams that you can’t—not with the knowledge that he has mates, and some of those mates are just on the other side of the sliding glass door. 
“I didn’t… I wasn’t…” Finding your words is complicated when his scent of rain washes over you. In your mind, you keep chanting that the closeness means nothing; it’s a hybrid thing. 
No, this has to be an Alpha hybrid thing. 
Alpha Hybrid thing.
“I know, Princess. You were being a proper Luna. Too bad Jungkookie isn’t here. I would like to see him hold back like the rest of us are,” he says, stepping back. His eyes are drawn to the glass door and his mates on the other side. 
“Hold back?” You question, turning around and following his gaze into your flat. Your eyes connect with those of Jimin’s.
“I think he would like a word in private with you, Princess,” Yoongi says as he goes inside without looking back. He harshly whispers something to Jimin, who nods with his eyes never leaving yours.
“Sorry to disturb your time with Yoongi-hyung, Luna. May I join you?” He asks while remaining inside the flat.
“Of course, Jimin. You weren’t… ah, you weren’t disturbing anything,” you smile softly, willing for the heat of whatever that was with Yoongi to go away with the breeze.
“Thank you, Luna.” You giggle at his use of your title, which causes Jimin to look confused.
“You guys don’t need to call me Luna. They only use it when they are in trouble.” You wave your good hand in front of you as you smile brightly.
“Oh. Umm… I just didn’t want to disrespect you in your pack house. With your powerful display of strength and the level of respect and honor you require of your pack, I would only want to support that.”
“Thank you, Jimin. I really do hope that none of you were offended. I know Yoongi said that none of you are but still.”
“No need to worry. None of us were offended.” Jimin walks over to the railing and looks at the sky. “Do you want to know what Yoongi-hyung said to me?”
Moving to stand beside him respectfully, “Only if you feel comfortable telling me.” Your response pulls a soft smile from him.
“He told me; he demanded me to find a way to connect with you,” he says, taking a deep breath, allowing your vanilla mate and sweet pea scent to give him the strength to continue. His sweet orange scent starting to mix with Yoongi’s rain.
“What did Manager Sejin tell you about our last Playmate? Did he say anything about how she left or what she said?” he asks, glancing over quickly.
Standing up straighter, the question catches you off guard. “He didn’t go into great detail. He did say that she was a permanent Playmate but found love in a human and broke her contract; however, she said some not-so-nice things.”
“That’s how the PR department told us to say it. We can say enough to answer questions but not enough to tell what really happened.”
Turning to face you directly. You follow his lead, giving Jimin your full attention. Your soul is willing Jimin to find his calm and strength to continue. 
“Jimin, I would rather hear it directly from you or your mates if any of you wanted to share, but I am also satisfied with only knowing what I do.”
“Hobi and Yoongi-hyung never got along with any of the playmates. The rest of the pack could always get along with practically anyone. We should have known from the beginning something wasn’t right when Alpha Kook didn’t like her from the beginning. Even then, she was with us for about three years.”
“I think she was around for so long because of me. I grew attached to her deeper than anyone else did. I even took her home when we had some time off. My former owner and family pack were shocked that I brought home someone other than a mate with me.”
“We never did anything. I never cheated on Bangtan, but I still feel like a part of me fell for her in a way.”
“Not every mate is a soulmate like you and Bangtan are, Jimin,” you quietly add. 
He chuckles and shakes his head, “True. Hybrids do have packs with non-soulmate bonded mates. Typically, these are caused by a strong connection with them, but again, it is rare, nearly unheard of, for that deep connection to be with a human.”
“Oh, I see. Evie and I are practically sisters, which is a version of a soulmate, I feel. Then Derek came along and I felt like I found a piece of me that I never knew was missing. Now, he is a member of the pack.”
“I thought she might be something like that with you,” you say, looking inside and watching your pack laughing with the other two Alphas.
“Oh no. The pack you have gathered, Luna, is one of a kind. I am in awe of the connection they have with you. You are different with them.”
“Different? Oh no. This is me.” you giggle.
“You have seen professional and pained versions of me. Honestly, I tend to react on instinct. I have no filter. I have a passion for my friends and family.”
Biting your bottom lip, you continue, “Genevie was right about what she said, though. I tend to put those important to me before myself. I have always struggled with my mental health, but I am a total goof and geeky nerd. You will see; you all will.”
“I struggled with some depression back in 2018,” Jimin admits, bringing his attention back to you. “I was still struggling with it until, gosh… 2020.”
“Seul-ki, the Playmate, was contracted on January 17, 2019. Now that I look back, I think she knew that she was not being accepted by the pack. She clung to me for security through my insecurities.”
Your heart breaks at his story. Stepping closer, you rest your hand on his arm, trying to offer any modicum of support: “They say hindsight is 20/20, but that doesn’t mean what she did was right or that you didn’t mean something to her.”
Looking at your hand on his arm, a soft smile graces his face. After taking a few moments to be in the moment with you and accept your support, he places his hand on top of yours.
“That wasn’t the worst part.” Clearing his throat, wetting his now dry lips, he huffs before continuing. 
“I am not sure, but BigHit believes that she might have broken her contract and shared private information. Seul-ki fell in love with a reporter from Dispatch. We think they met while he was tailing us like they always do.”
“To top it off, when she left, she said some things that tore at our souls. We, ah… we made her skin crawl when our animals would come out. It was disgusting to see such handsome men turn into such filthy animals.”
You quickly pull Jimin into a hug, wrapping your arms around his shoulders and your face buried in his neck. You are stunned by how hateful Seul-ki was to them.
Warm tears fall down your face and wet his neck, pulling a soft whine from him as he returns the hug. His arms wrap around your waist. You have always been emotional to others getting bullied because of your past.
“Sorry, Jimin. I am so sorry. Humans are mean and stupid. She shouldn’t have said that.  How can anyone say that? Something so barbaric,” you mumble into his neck. 
“It’s okay, Y/n,” Jimin says while rubbing soothing circles on your back. 
Leaning back, you wipe your face of the wet streaks, “You are so strong to come to PMS and look for another Playmate. Then you go and get stuck with me.”
“I know that we take a risk when we bring in a playmate. I was finally trying to get past what happened,” he pauses, searching your eyes. “I wasn’t ready to find you, and I am sorry that I kept away from you, but my Alpha got scared of my mates' reaction to you.”
“Please don’t worry about me. You can show me as much or as little of you without any negative consequences from me. You really don’t have to get any closer to me than you want to.” 
It's then that you realize you are engulfing the poor red panda.
Lowering your arms, you say, “I’m sorry,” and take a step back, only to be stopped by Jimin’s arms holding you tighter. “Jimin?”
“Just give us a second, please.”
Relinquishing your attempt at distancing yourself, you rest your arms around his shoulders again. Watching him map out every inch of your face. 
Being similar in height, you are eye to eye, allowing you to see his eyes' chestnut brown start to bleed through the whites and deepen into a darker reddish color.
Your breath catches in your throat, “Alpha Chim.”
A playful smile blooms on his face with a soft grunt, “Luna.”
The sound of your tiles coming from Alpha Chim feels like a wave of electricity falling over you, “Welcome to my packhouse, Alpha Chim.”. 
“Smell of Yoon."
“Yes, Alpha Yoon was with me before you came out. He scented me before going inside with your Prime Alpha and the rest of my pack. Is that okay, Alpha?”
“Mate scent, okay,” he says, raising his hand and almost cupping your face. “May I?"
“Yes, Alpha Chim,” you reply, tilting your head to expose your neck and closing your eyes. You have never been so thankful for wearing the sweetheart peasant shirt.
Jimin takes his time tracing your jawline and the outline of your ear. Then, as his fingers go down your neck to find your pulse point, he takes hold. He has a firm but comforting grip and massages your neck and shoulder. 
Now you can smell it, oranges. With Yoogni’s lingering scent,  you envision that this would be the smell of an orchard full of ripe oranges after a spring shower.
After a moment, his hand drops, but before you can straighten, you feel him move again. This time, he brings his nose to scent your skin where his hand was—finding the blend of Yoongi, your, and his scent. 
His warm breaths on your skin snap your eyes open, only to find you now have an audience. Pushing the Alpha away from you, he slowly releases you as he notices your sights are behind him.
“Princess. Jimin-ah. It's about time we head back to Bangtan packhouse,” Yoogni says with a knowing smile. Namjoon is standing behind him, questioning eyes trained on Jimin.
You nod and look at the Alpha holding you, and you are met with chestnut eyes, “Jimin?”
“Got it, Hyung.” He says, dropping his hold on you altogether. His posture has gone slightly stiff, but you don’t know if it's because his scenting was interrupted or something else.
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Jimin went right inside. You felt like he was trying to find that distance again. You decided to wait just a few, take a few deep breaths of the pure, unscented fall air. It would allow you to collect yourself and give Jimin a chance to escape. Once back inside your flat, leaving was simple but dragged out. 
Evie had packed up the remaining cookies to be taken back to the rest of Bangtan. 
Derek and Jimin took your packed belongings to the waiting vans. 
Namjoon and Yoongi, clad in bucket hats and masks, went with you to talk with the manager about your absence. They were unwilling to let you do it on your own—something about potential confrontation and protecting you.
The building manager was a gentle older man who always greeted everyone with a smile and wanted to share some kind of treat when he had visitors.  Today, it was butterscotch chews, one of your favorites. 
After explaining the change in your job description and the requirement to be temporarily housed elsewhere, the manager said he would watch your flat. He also suggested that you put a temporary disruption of water, power, and gas utilities. 
After additional planning, Evie stayed behind to load your few plants into her car to care for at her house. Jimin and Yoongi went in one van to head back to the AirBnb.
Namjoon, Derek, and you went in the other direction to take Derek home since he carpooled with Evie. You weren’t entirely sure why he couldn’t just carpool back, but maybe the plants taking up too much space in Evie’s car had something to do with it.
The van had hardly been in motion when the Guardian of Y/l/n Pack came out of the lovely Beta fox.
“Prime Alpha, how do you think your pack will handle the dating Y/n?” Derek asks bluntly.
Apparently, the plants had nothing to do with his persistent need to hitch a ride with you and the Prime Alpha. Internally, you groan at your pack's bluntness and wonder why they have taken an informal approach to the Bantang pack. It's like they are testing to see if you are worth being around them.
“Derek!” you say, shocked. “They are not dates. They are outings to get to know each other. You know very well that they are a mate-bonded pack. You’re writing our contract!”
“Yes, I am well aware of your contract. I am also aware they left out their standard rut clause, and both sides are still requiring a full physical with inclusive testing.” He responds, rolling his eyes, “but that doesn’t explain how they will react to their non-dating dates with you.”
“Mr. Gulley, I understand your concern for your Luna,” Namjoon interjects. “Spending time individually with our previous playmates was normal for us because that is what any playmate is for. We also go out in pairs or small groups for outings.”
“The pack discussed it throughout today, and everyone is on the same page. We understand that some of us, such as Yoongi-hyung, have connected with your Luna on an instinctual level.”
“Others have expressed wanting that same level of connection with her,” he says, his eyes focused on you. “Jungkook, Seokjin-hyung, and now Jimin-ah have already started trying to connect. So far, no one has shown any signs of territorial dominance over your Luna.”
“Territorial dominance?” you ask.  Internally, you remind yourself not to melt at the continued use of your Luna title.
Derik answers, “Evie gave us a wonderful display today of how  Omegas and Betas are protective of the pack or pack house.”
“However, Luna, imprinting or becoming territorial towards a single member of the pack is common with Alphas. This can cause the remaining pack members to need permission to interact with the chosen member.”
“But I am not in their pack.” Looking at Namjoon, “I am not a member of your pack, Prime Alpha. Right?”
“Technically, you are not at this point. We cannot officially bring you into the pack, even as a temporary member, until the contract is finalized after your medical appointments.” Namjoon says, attempting to withhold his disdain for having you continue to think everything is temporary.
“Temporary pack member. You want me to be a temporary pack member. Are such things as temporary members? Can I be in two packs like that? What would I be in Bangtang Pack? I can’t be Luna to a pack of Alphas! Derek, what will happen to our pack?”
“The family pack with Evie and I will remain with you as our Luna. Nothing will ever change that. We will always have a place for you. While you are busy with your other pack, the leader tends to fall to the next in line, which is me.”
“Are you okay with that? Evie and you fight like cats and dogs… well, cats and foxes. You are also an amazing Beta and always take good care of her. You have taken care of both of us when we needed it. You also have Mathew, who can help if needed, I suppose.”
“Not to worry. I will be fine, Luna. Evie and I talked about it briefly when you were on the balcony. We are going to have dinner tomorrow with Mathew to settle a few things.” Derek smiles.
“Okay, you can always call me, though. I am still here,” you reassure him. “When are my appointments and the final meeting to sign the contract?”
“Ah yes,” Derek says, pulling out his phone. “Your medical appointment is tomorrow morning at 9:30 a.m. at the Bangtan Packhouse, and the contract signing is two days later at PMS, but the time hasn’t been confirmed yet.”
“Once the contract is completed with the Bangtan pack, you will gain access to the pack’s group and individual schedules. As to where you will fit within the pack dynamic, that is something you will just have to feel that out as the pack gets to know you and you to know them.”
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“Jimin-ah, when I asked you to connect with Y/n, did you think I was trying to push you?” Yoongi asks the younger Alpha, sitting on the bench seat with unfocused eyes.
Shaking his head, he says, “No, but I couldn’t… no, I didn’t want to stop.”
“What do you mean?” Yoongi asks with concern.
“I came with Namjoon-hyung so that I could learn more about her. I thought that being in her pack house would be able to show me something. But, the closer we got to her flat, the more restless my Alpha got.” 
Jimin pauses to take a deep breath. “Then, when she went from Miss Y/n to Luna, I felt her energy, prowess, and dominance, and it intrigued my Alpha. He kept pushing to call her Luna just to see her reaction every time.”
“The lemon of her scent when she was in her Luna mode mixed so well with my orange. Then add on her natural sweet pea, your petrichor, hyung’s leather, and the vanilla mate scent,” groans. “It was so much. I can’t describe it.”
“Oh no, I get that. Trust me. My Alpha and I both reacted to her ‘little’ show. That is why I followed her outside. We had to be near her, get my hands on her, scent her. It’s irritating that she doesn’t recognize the mate scent and bonds that are forming yet.” Yoongi reminisces. 
“But, Jimin-ah, what happened when the two of you were alone?” Yoongi asks, moving to sit on the bench. 
After Yoongi moves, Jimin lies down with his head in the older Alpha’s lap, “I told her about Seul-ki.”
A soft gasp of shock comes from Yoongi. Immediately, the younger alpha is covered in soft rain, followed by fingers running through his hair.
“She cried for us. She apologized for what Seul-ki did. She promised that I could stay away, and she would be okay with it,” Jimin says softly. 
The weight of your words made his chest tight, “My Alpha came out and scented her, hyung. He accepted her declarations but got skittish when you came to get us.”
“Sorry to have interrupted that moment for you, Minnie. I know it's been a while since your Alpha has initiated scenting with anyone.”
“I don’t understand it, hyung. It’s like my heart is everywhere, and my mind is trying to keep up after staying away.” 
Yoongi watches as silent tears start to fall from his mate's eyes. Hooking a hand under Jimin’s neck and lifting, Yoongi leans down and softly kisses away the tears.
Jimin’s eyes flutter at the feeling of Yoongi’s lips on his skin. The jaguar's soft purr is heard as his kisses start covering the younger mate’s face. 
Opening his eyes, Jimin cups Yoongi’s face, which pauses his kisses. “Yoongi-hyung, please.”
“I got you, my minnie love,” Yoongi says as he leans down, lightly brushing his lips over Jimin’s.
A soft whine leaves Jimin before he moves to be more in Yoongi’s lap. His knees are curled against the back of the bench seat, and he is chest-to-chest with the jaguar. Yoongi continues to leave almost phantom kisses on Jimin’s lips. 
Once settled, Jimin rests one hand on Yoongi’s chest, his other hand sliding around to the back of Yoongi’s head with another whine.
“What is it you want, my minnie love? Use your words,” Yoongi teases with a slight nip to Jimin’s lower lip. 
“Alpha, help settle my… my everything. Mate, Alpha, kiss me, please,” Jimin begs, gripping the older Alpha with both hands.
“Hmm, there is my good boy,” Yoongi smiles, tightening his grip on Jimin’s neck and securing his other hand on the younger man’s thigh. 
Jimin instinctually tenses. After all, he is still an Alpha, and being trapped isn’t normal.  Breathing in for a few seconds, Jimin connects with their personal mate bond. It is almost instantaneous, and the younger man sighs in relief and relaxes into the security his mate’s hold provides.
Once that change happens, Yoongi kisses Jimin, grounding Jimin’s thoughts and feelings away from what has happened in the last week, bringing him to the here and now. 
Yoongi’s scent fills Jimin’s every breath.
Yoongi’s body heat penetrates Jimin’s very core.
Yoongi’s mouth pulls to be Jimin’s sole focus. 
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It’s not a pretty kiss. Jimin is so scattered that the typically controlled minx of a mate is everywhere. The passionate pace with which Jimin attacks Yoongi makes the exchange wet and sloppy. 
Yoogni matches the intensity of the kiss and follows Jimin's pace. As turned on as he was at the Y/n display as Luna, he knows this is not about him.
When Jimin licks at the seam of Yoongi’s mouth, he immediately gives in, allowing the young Alpha to explore and try to find some form of control. 
Jimin's taste is beautiful, and the feel of his tongue tangling with Yoongi’s is mesmerizing.
However, Jimin doesn’t want to be in charge. He wants the older Alpha to put him in his place. So he changes tactics, sucking not so gently on Yoongi’s tongue, pulling a groan from the older mate. With that delicious sound, Jimin knows he won't stay passive much longer. 
After seven years of learning what every noise, scent change, and muscle movement means, it isn’t hard to play each other like a fiddle. 
One more harsh suck of Yoogni’s tongue, matched with a tug of his hair, causes both of the older’s hands to grip tightly. Yoongi’s hips jerk up, aching for some friction.
Pulling away from Yoongi, Jimin says in a sultry voice, “Something wrong, Alpha?”
“No, but I think you might want to ask yourself that,” Yoogni smirks. Quickly, he uses the grip on his neck to angle Jimin’s body to lay across his lap, with his back resting against the side of the van.
Confusion furrows Jimin’s brow, “What do you…Ahhh!” Jimin’s thoughts are cut off at the feel of Yoongi palming his growing erection. 
Cupping Jimin’s length through his tight, dancing pants, Yoongi slowly moves his hand up and down. Relishing every twitch of the younger mate’s member.  
When God created Jimin as a short man, it was because someone added inches to the wrong leg. Out of the mates, Jimin was unmatched in length. 
Paying attention with a tighter grip at the head, “What was that, minnie love?”
“Alpha... Ahh... aaalphha,” whines Jimin as he starts to rut into Yoongi’s hand. M…mooore please, Alpha.” Any dominance or control the younger mate thought he had from before was lost in the waves of pleasure Yoongi granted Jimin.
Glancing out the dark-tinted windows, Yoongi is starting to recognize some of the surroundings, meaning they are close to the packhouse. “You think you can finish before we get to the packhouse, minnie love? Are you going to be a good boy and give me your release?”
“Yes, yes, Alpha. Please let me, Alpha. I’m a good boy, please,”
“Mmm… I do love it when you are my good boy. Asking so politely,” Yoongi quickens his speed, which causes the red panda to groan unapologetically. 
The graceful bend of his cock barely keeps the young mate's impressive length below his waistband. A dampness started to form on Jimin’s pants from the pre-cum steadily leaking out. 
The sight is making Yoongi’s mouth water. Seokjin may have an oral fixation, it was Yoongi with the tongue technology. The jaguar hybrid’s textured tongue was a bonus for his mates when his desire to drink them dry took over. 
A brief moan escapes Yoongi at the thought of what you would taste like and how you would react to the feel of his tongue on your skin and in your various depths. A high-pitched whine from the panda in his lap brings Yoongi back to his current task.
Changing his rhythms, Yoongi brings Jimin closer to their goal, their aroused scent growing thick in the air. Yoongi makes a note to compensate the driver for his discretion and for taking an extra long route back.  
Slipping his hand down to play with Jimin’s taught balls, “Ohh minnie love,” squeeze, “My good boy is sooo heavy. You’re so full. Have you been saving it for me? Hmm, my good boy?”
While Yoongi may be playing his body like a pro, it’s Yoongi’s words that bring Jimin into a headspace of comfort and grounding. Purring the words out, he says, “Good boy. Such a good boy for me. Saving everything for me. How I wish to swallow you all up, but that will have to be for another time.”
Glancing up one more time, Yoongi can see the packhouse gate. With a firm squeeze, Yoongi palms Jimin with a tempo fast enough that Jimin can only go along for the ride. His muscles strain to hold on just a little longer as the coil in his abdomen winds tighter.
His whines and pleas are like music to Yoongi’s ears. Mixes of Alpha, too much, don’t stop, good boy, and please fire off in random order from Jimin as he holds on for dear life. He is curling into himself as he builds higher and higher.
Yoongi solely focuses on the pleasure displayed on Jimin’s face. He encourages the red panda to lose himself in the heat of the moment, praises him for being such a good boy, and always reminds the young mate that Yoongi has him. 
At the sound of silence followed by a gasp, Yoongi knows Jimin is right there and waiting for his Alpha, like a good boy.
Tilting Jimin’s head back and into his shoulder, Yoongi growls one command before biting over Jimin’s mating mark, “Cum.”
The reaction is immediate and without thought. Jimin lets out a high-pitched whine with his back bowed as he gives Yoongi his release. Rutting against the older man’s palm, he rides out his high, giving everything to the older mate as a good boy should. 
“Look at you. Such a good, messy boy cumming for me,” Yoogni says, his eyes now admiring the sizable dark patch showing on Jimin’s pants. “I think you deserve a reward for being such a good boy. Don’t you agree, my minnie love?”
“Yes, please. Good boy for Alpha.” Jimin huffs between breaths, his unfocused eyes searching Yoongi’s face for what to do next.
Namjoon may be the Prime Alpha, but Yoongi was one of the Dominants in the pack when it came to different forms of pleasure. Yoongi has set rewards and aftercare requirements for all his mates.
“When we finish parking, you will wait for your reward in my den. Understood?” instructs Yoongi softly, running his hands over Jimin’s thigh and massaging his neck.  
“Yes, Alpha.”
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After dropping Derek off at his apartment, Namjoon, having explained that everyone should be home already, you both decided to bring home dinner. This time, the Pack Alpha picked the meal.
The food smelled divine but spicy, which worried you because spice was definitely not your thing. However, you were reassured that only a little over half of the food was spicy because Taehyung couldn’t handle spicy either.
Once at the packhouse, Seokjin helped Namjoon bring your bags and dinner inside, allowing you to carry only your purse. You were surprised that Yoongi or Jungkook were not waiting for you. 
Reminding yourself that they have a house full of mates that would also need some of their attention, you attempt to push any negative feelings away. You had better not get used to monopolizing any of their time starting now. 
Going into what would officially be your room by the end of the week, you looked around and imagined what you would do with it. It’s not like it's permanent-permanent, but still, having a plant or some books. Maybe photos of your pack would be nice.
Agh, first you have to do something with the bed. You were given a lot of pillows and blankets, but they were piled in various ways. It would be what your mom would call “a down-right mess.” Letting out a deep sigh of sadness, you started to rearrange everything. 
Putting things back into what would be considered a proper bed. Laying the pillows at the top of the bed and smoothing the blankets as flat as possible with one good hand.
Growing up in a family that insisted on perfection, you always hated making your bed in the mornings. Keeping your room clean and having a 5-star hotel-looking bed helped overshadow some of your shortcomings. 
Your friends in Colorado were always impressed with your cleanliness, which was a point of pride and joy for your mother. One of the few things your mother would praise you about was a spotless bed and awards from horseback riding competitions. 
Once you moved to California, Evie and her siblings never understood why your mother would yell about your bedding habits. You always tried to brush it off and avoid having sleepovers at your place because of it. 
“Y/n?” The sound of your name being called pulls you from your thoughts as you look to the doorway to find Hoseok.
“Hi, Hoseok-ssi. Did you have a good day today?”
“Hi. Yeah. Just got some new things this Airbnb didn’t have for the pack.” Looking around you with concern, “Are you going somewhere?”
“Umm… no, well, the dining room in a moment,” you answer, looking around to ensure you are done.
Standing and walking to him, you say, “I think Jin and Prime Alpha should have everything set out by now. We stopped for takeout at JinCook, a local Korean restaurant nearby.”
Even though you walk closer to him, his eyes stay focused on your bed.
“I'm sorry my bed is still messy. It's harder to make it with only one hand than one would think. I would have made it this morning, but I was in a rush.”
“I am not… it’s not… it’s well made. You make a bed better than half the people I know, but why? It's already getting darker outside, and you will be sleeping soon.” He asks, his eyes finally looking at you.
“Mother always said, ‘If you make your bed every morning, you will have accomplished the first task of the day, and if you cannot do the little things, then you can never do the things worth being recognized for.’” you recite the words that have been ingrained in you for years.
“Your mother said that? She made you break down… I mean, remake your bed every day?”
“Yep, and I would be in trouble if I didn’t. There’s nothing wrong with making your bed and keeping a clean house, Hoseok,” you pat his arm and move past him, heading to the dining room. 
Hoseok remains in the doorway. Glaring at the bed and processing what you said.  Soon, the smell of cherries grows more substantial, “Jin.”
“Hello, Hoba,” he stops, glancing over Hoseok’s shoulder, “Where is Y/n?”
“She went to the dining room, but look,” he moves to the side, allowing the eldest mate to look at your room.
Looking in, Seokjin smiles. He sees that you used the travel gear he left for you, and it pleases his Alpha to provide something. 
His eyes then travel to your bed, smile dropping, “Her nest.”
“She tore it down, hyung. I caught her trying to fold corners with one hand, and then she apologized for it still being messy,” Hoseok says, his voice hushing with astonishment.
“What? First off, she needs to teach me how to make those corners, but more importantly, why?” he comments and asks as he walks farther into the room. 
“Jin! Hoseok! Jimin! Yoongi! Jungkook! The food is going to get cold,” you yell from the dining room. 
They both look towards the dining room, “She knows about nests. She told me last night when we helped gather materials. She keeps emphasizing that she was making a blanket fort or human nest.”
“Namjoon said there was an interesting interaction at her pack house, and she asked Yoon and Minnie if they were offended by what she did because she was human.”
“What did she do?” Hoseok asks, turning his attention back to his mate in the room. 
“I didn’t get details other than she proved why she is the head of her pack. Well, that and she has a feisty Omega,” Seokjin informs Hoseok. 
“She may know what it is, but does she understand what it means to us? Or that we would be okay with her keeping it? Rather, we would want her to keep it, right?” Hoseok worries.
Taking Hoseok’s hand and gently kissing the back, he heads toward the dining room. “Of course, she could keep it. I don't know what she knows about nests, but I did mention that she should build one with Jimin.”
Hoseok stops abruptly with a gasp. Hurrying back to your room, he shuts the door while glancing at the stairs, “Jin-hyung, could you imagine how Jimin would react to seeing her nest gone?!?”
“Even though he didn’t say anything, he looked happy to see her have one. It's something to connect with her about,” Hoseok says, rejoining Jin. “Her nest and the inclusion of the pack are what made him confident about seeing her this afternoon.”
“Oh, yeah, no. He doesn’t need to see that,” Jin agrees.
The boys find their seats and start to dig in. Shortly after, the remaining three joined the table with wet hair and looked ready for bed. You note they all look still pink from their showers and wonder how hot they take them. 
Dinner was yummy, all thanks to your non-spicy companion sitting next to you. Taehyung saved you more than once from eating something that you were sure would equal the death of your stomach.
Conversations were more manageable than yesterday. Everyone seems to talk around or over the others. They randomly jump from topic to topic. It’s a bit of chaos, but they are mates, and it feels oddly domestic.
Not once did you feel unable to keep up. However, after you yawned for the “millionth time,” according to Yoongi, you were ushered off to bed. You knew the boys had to be tired, but they all seemed far from ready to sleep. 
You crawl into bed after changing and using the skincare products left in your bathroom. You spend the next few minutes pushing, pulling, stuffing, and rebuilding your little blanket fort. 
This time, you try out Jimin’s body pillow, Taehyung’s blanket, and Hoseok’s pillow, even though you really want to use the ones left by Yoongi and Jungkook. You figure that this would be the first small step to pay attention to them equally. 
It's not professional to have favorites, right?
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Once you close your bedroom door, the dining room goes silent. They all listen to your movements before anyone says anything. As soon as nothing is detected, Namjoon, Yoongi, and Jimin are the pack's sole focus. 
“I guess a pack meeting is in order for a few reasons,” Namjoon starts. 
“A few reasons? That is one way to put it,” Jungkook chuckles, his eyes roaming over to Yoongi and Jimin before settling back on the Prime Alpha. 
“I will let Yoongi explain Y/n’s living situation first. Then, we will talk about how things went with her family pack, answer any questions, and make any necessary plans. Yoongi-hyung?”
All eyes shift to the jaguar, stoic-faced as ever, weighing how to explain anything that has happened today.
“Well, Y/n lives closer to PMS in the Downtown LA area with rather high crime rates. My Alpha is not happy about that. Her building doesn’t have any gates or locks to get into the building,” Yoongi starts with the most concerning part of the visit for him as your protector. 
“Even though she lives on one of the upper levels, she only has a simple deadbolt and chain to keep herself safe.” Sounds of displeasure rise in the room, but they are still respectful to you sleeping nearby.
“When I went to drop her off, she wouldn’t let me in her flat. She mentioned a nearby place she frequents for coffee, tea, and food. It’s really a gem of a place and could easily grow with the right guidance, but that isn’t the issue,” he continued.
“If it’s a gem, why is there an issue, hyung?” asks Taehyung, who was thinking of ways to help the business before the crypticness set in.
“Carlo, a domestic Mexican dog Hybrid, runs it. He said his hybrid side is called a Chamuco. Anyway, he runs the kitchen and orders the food. He is happily mated to his wife, and they are waiting for their second litter.” 
The pack smiles at the happy news, but their faces still show confusion about where the issue is.
“His business partner, Payu, is a Thai human infatuated with Y/n. He got defensive with me regarding her, especially when I couldn’t explain my intentions or who I was,” Yoongi tries to tell his mates without a hiss. 
“She is a lovely person. I am not surprised that she has admirers and it’s nice that she has someone that looks out for her. His crush will fade eventually,” Seokjin comments, still confused about why it’s a problem.
“No, Hyung. He told me he planned to ask her out the next time she stopped by the cafe.” Yoongi stressed how soon things may get even more complicated.
“She is living here now, so going all the way to the cafe will be hard. We just need to make sure to avoid the area. Send its location to the pack chat, Yoongi.” Namjoon instructs, giving no more for discussion.
Nodding at the order, Yoongi does just that. The ping shows a photo of the two owners in front of the business doors. 
“I know we all want to keep her safe, which we can while she is here, but we cannot do anything right now about her flat being where it is. However, it is rather small for a pack house,” Namjoon continues.
“Yeah, I am pretty sure that the whole packhouse could fit in our current living room,” Jimin comments. 
“Seriously?” Hoseok exclaims but is quickly hushed by the other pack members. “Sorry. How does she have the basics needed for survival in a small place? You said it was the packhouse, too?”
“Yeah,  her family pack would refer to it as the packhouse. It haaaas enough to get by, I guess,” Jimin shrugs. 
“I spoke with her beta, that fox hybrid from her work,” he says, looking around, making sure everyone remembers who he is talking about. “He says that the packhouse moved there about two years ago, and about a month after she accepted him to the pack.
“Who accepted him to the pack?” Jungkook asks, his ears standing tall, and he starts thinking of how to impress the Alpha of your pack. 
With a smile remembering the moment in the flat when the pack dynamics took over, Jimin looks directly at the youngest Alpha, “Their Luna, Y/n.”
Jungkook’s bunny ears drop at this newest information, “Luna Y/n… Y/n is the Pack Luna… like the head of the pack is our Y/n?”
Namjoon, Yoongi, and Jimin nod as they watch the rest of the pack process the information. 
Seokjin and Hoseok seem shocked, but this makes sense, given how you have behaved around them thus far. However, they still wonder why you keep getting shocked at some of their Alpha behaviors, as you act as the equivalent of an Alpha in your pack. Wouldn’t you know these things already?
Jungkook, on the other hand, is going through so many emotions. His mind is filled with images of him scenting you, his mate, who is also a Luna. God, if he had known that last night… 
“Does she acknowledge herself as Luna, or is it like an honorary or teasing title between friends?” Jungkook asks, his face almost as stoic as Yoongi’s, “Hyungs, be serious, please. Honestly, is she a Luna?”
Clearing his throat, Yoongi leans forward with a smirk, “Put it this way… After Her Omega decided to threaten the pack with being neutered, Luna Y/n scruffed the Omegan cat to remind her of her place in front of everyone.”
The tension rises as the thought of you holding any type of power intrigues and entices each of them in different ways. Most of their minds wander to ways of getting you to use that power with or around them, dominating and controlling different situations. 
On the other hand, some want you to relinquish that power and control, allowing them to dominate your every sense, getting you to relax fully into their Alphas, and accepting the safety they will provide you. 
“In the heat of the moment, she is by all means ‘Luna Y/n’ with no questions asked,” Jimin interjects. “However, when I called her Luna, she became flustered and was concerned about her and her Omega offending us.”
“Let's just say Y/n has had to do many things and has become skilled in ways that most humans wouldn’t even try properly. She certainly doesn’t abuse that power like some more dominant humans do.  Though, I am not convinced that even Y/n knows where she stands in the overall scheme of things,” the Prime Alpha comments.
Looking at each of his mates, Namjoon says, “I spoke with her Omega. I learned a decent amount about Y/n interactions with Mrs. Genevie’s family pack. What concerns me was Genvie explaining that Y/n took to the pack quickly, almost as if she was an orphan.”
“An orphan?” questions Seokjin. “What about her mother or father?”
Namjoon’s face fell, “After talking with both members of her pack, I only learned that she came to California with her mom and brother. Her mom made sure she never talked about her father or that side of the family.”
Seokjin and Hoseok share a look, both remembering what you did to your nest.
“I think her mom was quite controlling and..” Seokjin pauses, looking at Jimin. “And I think she has something against hybrids. Which doesn’t make sense because Y/n’s mom allowed her to be friends and interact with her Omega’s family pack.”
“Why are you looking at me? Why do you say that, Hyung?” Jimin asks, scooting forward in his chair. His orange scent is curled with worry. His eyes look between the two older mates as they share his concern.
“We all saw that she made a nest with our things when we left this morning. Before she came in here, I was talking with her and well… she made her bed,” Hoseok says with his eyes never leaving Jimin. 
“Wha..What do you mean?” Jimin pushes.
“I mean, she tore down her ‘blanket fort.’ Put our extra materials at the foot of the bed, and it looked the same as when we arrived for the very first time,” Hoseok explains. 
“She didn’t break it down because she wanted to. She broke it down because her mother drilled it into her to do so—to the point that she would get into trouble if she didn’t,” adds Seokjin while slightly glaring at Hoseok.
Jimin stands and paces behind his mates' chairs. He is trying to keep the memories at bay—the memories of his former owners—the voices of his former owners scolding him, the feeling of worthlessness, and the sounds of flesh beating into flesh. Did you live like that, too? Were you raised to be someone who you really are not, just like him?
Most hybrids were purchased or raised by the small percent of the world who had more money than they knew what to do with. Jimin’s mother was pregnant with him when she was bought. After he was born, they trained him to be a showpiece.
They thought that because he was male and a bear, that automatically made him an Alpha. 
As a young boy, Jimin was soft and cuddly. He learned to build nests from his Omega mother, but they had to hide them. If their owners saw him build or sleep in a nest, they would tear it down and beat him.
After he presented as an Alpha, they would beat him if he displayed any non-Alpha behaviors, such as scenting, cuddling, purring, and even denning, which was the Alpha equivalent of nesting, but the stupid humans didn’t know any different.
It wasn’t long after he presented as an Alpha that his mother passed away. When they attempted to breed her again, she was too old to carry cubs. The owners didn’t care. All they knew was that she was a sow that had successfully had other cubs, so why not more?
Once his mother passed, Jimin shut down and became the perfect Alpha for his owners. He was the perfect gentleman at events and the amazingly attentive ‘toy’ for their close friends, male or female. 
The only time Jimin felt like himself was when they went to extravagant galas, and they would make him dance with anyone willing to spend money. He would lose himself in the music. 
It wasn’t until his owner’s best friend mentioned how Jimin’s flexibility and graceful movements would look beautiful on stage that he found some form of reprieve. 
That reprieve came in the form of schooling. His owners sent him to a performing arts University to learn several dance, writing, and singing styles. The goal was to find more ways to make money off of Jimin. 
During this time, a scout approached him and asked if he was interested in becoming an idol. After some discussion, Jimin jumped at the chance to be an Idol. It would allow him to escape his owners and find his freedom. 
Luckily for him, not only did he find his freedom, he found his mates. 
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The pack took the new information to heart and agreed to use the pack nesting room tonight for the first time. It would allow the pack a chance to connect again, and, with all the disturbing news, they all needed the comfort. 
It took Jimin and Taehyung about 15 minutes to build up to an acceptable level of comfort. Using some of the new bedding that Hoseok had gotten to replace what they had given you.
Seokjin lay against the far wall under the large panoramic window. Jimin pressed his back into his front. Finishing the Jimin sandwich was Yoongi. Seokjin and Yoongi wrapped their arms around Jimin to ground him to the present. Both of the older Alphas saw the shadows of the past haunt their precious panda’s face and wanted to offer solace for him.
Jungkook and Taehyung were cuddled together on Yoongi's side. The former became the latter’s pillow for the night. Taehyung curled an arm around the bunny, and the other hand was tucked into Yoongi’s hair, absent-mindedly scratching his scalp behind his ears. 
Hoseok smiled at his mates, already hearing soft snores from a few but noting that the Prime Alpha had not yet joined. Listening through the house, he could hear movement down the hall.
Softly closing the door to the pack nest, Hoseok went to find the missing Alpha. It didn’t take long to find him as he was pacing the dining room and kitchen. His eyebrows furrowed, his tail hanging low, almost touching the ground, and he seemed to be in his own dark world. 
“Prime Alpha?” Hoseok calls softly, trying not to startle his leader. 
The calling of his title snaps Namjoon out of his thoughts, “Hoseok-hyung, why are you still up?” 
“I could ask you the same thing,” he responds, walking closer to him. The Prime Alpha’s faint leather scent tells Hoseok more than enough. Closing the distance, the marten pulls his wolf mate into a tight hug.
Melting into the hold of his mate, Namjoon breathes in his lilac and vanilla scent. Allowing the presence of the pack’s sunshine mate, as they call him, to calm the racing and running of Namjoon’s mind into something more manageable. “Are we doing the right thing by Y/n?”
“Oh, Joonie. I know I was harsh, and the pack didn’t respond well to your idea, but I think it was the only way you thought would help us keep her,” comments Hoseok, rubbing his back in comforting circles. 
“I believe the mate bond is already starting to work magic, Joon. She may be human, but she isn’t immune to it. Remember last year you read all those studies?” Hoseok questioned.
“I remember. You were so interested in the results. They showed that humans can respond to the bond just as strongly as a hybrid, but they just take a while to recognize it.”
“She won’t be mad that we are lying to her? That we are doing all of this with alternative intentions? That I am a horrible Prime Alpha because I didn’t act on the bond right away?” Namjoon asks rapidly. 
“Joonie… Joon…” Hoseok tries to interrupt, “Alpha!” The title again stops Namjoon from continuing to spiral. Pulling back from the hug, Namjoon looks at Hoseok with his eyes, searching for answers that he knows only Y/n holds. 
“Prime Alpha, Namjoon, our wolfie,” Hoseok coos. “Y/n may be all those or none of these. Just know she is also kind. She seems to be just as insecure about everything as we are.”
Namjoon’s eyes focus again on something Hoseok cannot see, “I want to talk with her family pack again without Y/n. At least I would like to let them know she is our mate. Maybe they can help us.”
“That is a brilliant idea, Joon!” smiles Hoseok. 
“Do you think maybe we should all meet with them, just me or a few of us?” Namjoon asks as his focus returns to the mate in his arms. 
“Well, tomorrow, Jin-hyung has a plan for y/n. He wants to start the one-on-one dates and has already ensured his schedule was cleared. So maybe something with you and Yoongi-hyung?”
“That is a good idea. I am glad Seokjin is going to start the dates. He always has a level head when it comes to bringing mates into the fold. Unlike me and my muddled mind and Kookie wanting to jump right into things,” chuckles Namjoon. 
As he relaxes, his leather and vanilla scent returns in full. Taking Hoseok’s hand, the two start walking to the pack nest. “I think tomorrow, I will let the rest of the pack know and ask who wants to join me.”
“Sounds great, Alpha. Now let’s go to bed,” agrees Hoseok as he opens the door and leads the Pack Alpha into the nest.
Glancing over the nest, seeing each of his mates with soft features of sleep gracing their features makes love in Namjoon’s heart blossom. He always wanted to be the Pack Alpha, and then when it was apparent all his mates were also Alphas, it was an honor to be recognized as their Prime Alpha. 
He was lying down, with Hoseok curling along his back and acting like a koala by hooking his limbs around him. Sleeping Hoseok was just as clingy if not more so, than awake Hoseok.
Focusing on the partly open door, the smell of Sweetpea blows in, mixing with Hoseok’s lilac, Jungkook’s snickerdoodle, Taehyung’s ebony, Yoongi’s petrichor, Jimin’s oranges, Soekjin’s cherries, and all with the rich undertone of vanilla. 
The scents reminded the Prime Alpha that his mates were at least safe in the packhouse. Namjoon sighed, his body succumbing to sleep while his Alpha settled, a bit more at ease now with the plan that had been made.  
Previous / Next
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Taglist - Closed
@braveangel777 @bethanysnow @danielle143 @nenefix-on @im-gemmy @fluffy-canada-pancakes @staytinyville @juju-227592 @levislifeline @carolinexkpop @m00njinnie @drenix004 @singukieee @avadakadabra93 @dazzlingjade @sehun096rainbow @sunshinecallie @seoullove96 @reallysparklychaos @tired7o7 @channiespup @cryingpages @kittycatkrissa @captain-joongz @roseidol @hecateslittlewitchling @ayoo-bangtan @someshinesomedont @cerulean1riz @butterfliesinthenightsky
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mint-yooxgi · 1 year ago
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Promises - Yandere!Kraken!Felix
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Yandere AU & Kraken AU - First Person POV
Genre: Mature, Smutty Themes, Internal Monologue
Pairing: Felix X Implied Chubby!Fem!Reader
Words: 1,958
Warnings: Implied violence and shipwreck, kidnapping, Felix is a type of Sea God in this, mentions of past sexual relations. Tentacles. This is a Yandere story, it will contain themes such as stalking, violence, obsession, possessive natures, and just general overall creepiness and swearing. You have been warned.
A/n: Did I base the start of this drabble on the ending scene in Dead Man's Chest? Perhaps. Is this a bit tamer than the others. Maybe. Either way, I still hope you like it! I've been slowly easing myself back into writing, so I'm happy with what I've been able to do. Plus, I just fucking love the banner I made for this hehehe... Anyways, Feedback is greatly appreciated! Enjoy!~
The Thirteenth of The Feral Drabbles
They thought they could keep you away from me.
They really thought they could keep you away from me.
It’s laughable. I thought it was a known rule for sailors not to anger the sea, but alas. Here we are.
The frantic screams and shouts don’t deter me for one second. I know what I came here for, and I’m not leaving without you. You’re mine. I warned them what the consequences would be, yet still they refused to give you to me. Even after we promised ourselves to each other! Can you believe that?
Oh, that sounds so harsh. It’s not like you didn’t also choose me. It’s these… these… things keeping us apart. They don’t understand our love. Think I’m corrupting you, or something.
Such bullshit. The only thing I’m corrupting is their ability to live.
They hid you on the third level, thinking you’d be safe within the deepest confines of the ship. Little do they know it’s the worst place you could be. It’s like they want you to get hurt, like they want me to kill you. Such things I would never do. 
Still, despite my anger as I tear this floating piece of wood apart, I’m careful. Your safety is my top priority, and I’ve already ensured that. Right now, you rest, cocooned inside a few of my tentacles. Magic surrounds you, ensuring none of their attacks have any effect on me or you. Like hell I’ll allow them to disturb you now. Besides, you passed out shortly after my assault started on the ship, but you don’t have to worry. I’ve got you.
I can still remember when we first met, how you told me you didn’t fare well with sea travel. Yet another offence they’ve made against you. I’ll never forgive them for their transgressions. Sinners need to pay, and I am here to pass my divine judgement on those that would call themselves ‘heroes’.
Do not fear, My Beloved. Once I finish smashing apart this pathetic excuse of driftwood, I’ll take you home. 
Where you’ve always belonged. 
With me.
These planks are so brittle, it’s almost laughable. Your captor’s pathetic attempts to defend themselves are cute, in a way. If not for the fact that every time I start to pull you out of the wreckage, more of them show up to try and hinder me. I don’t know why they’re so obsessed with protecting you now when they’ve never done so before.
I’m the one who always saves you. I’m the one who ensures you no harm. Not them.
No matter. They haven’t seen everything that I can do. My capabilities far surpass what their puny, closed off minds can comprehend. I’ve got magic beyond the darkest depths of the ocean, strength greater than the harshest of tides. There is no being, save myself, that could keep me away from you.
I don’t even know why they try.
Finally, I’m able to pull you out of that godforsaken wreckage and unleash my full wrath upon these wretches. The boat snaps like a twig as I pull the debris and all remaining survivors below the surface. 
None will survive. They don’t get to. I won’t let them.
Honestly, it’s kind of fun tearing stuff apart. I’ve always enjoyed making a mess of things. I only wish you could be awake to see just how strong your lover can be. After all, I’m doing this for you. I warned them about what would happen should they lay their filthy, traitorous hands all over you. I’m simply staying true to my word!
You know firsthand that I’m a very truthful guy. I would never lie to you, My Pearl. I would rather be slow roasted over an open fire than even think to deceive you.
Aren’t I so loyal?
Oh. Right. You aren’t awake to hear my teasing. Teasing which you seem quite fond of whenever I’m with you.
I think you just like hearing my voice…
That’s okay, Beloved. I will speak for as long as you desire me to. Besides, the feeling is quite mutual.
Gods- I can’t wait to see your face when you wake up in our home, and I get to tell you everything that I’ve done for you. Finally, we can be together, free of oppressive opinions and suppressive stares. Where I’m taking you, we can be ourselves, and the magic of my ocean will keep you safe. Eventually, when you’re ready, you’ll even become like me, too. 
Won’t that be incredible? Just thinking about it makes my whole body tingle.
Or maybe that’s just the change in depth.
I promise my home isn’t too much further out, and it’s in a safe area. You’ll be able to live here with me free of any restraints. I’ll be your comfort. I’ll be your guide. I will provide for you everything you will ever need. 
There is nothing stopping our love now.
I’ll even make sure that no sliver of the wreckage I just caused gets to you. The currents listen to me. They’re my friends, and soon they will be yours, too.
Either way, I’m glad that’s over, because now I can focus on you! I know that you’d be celebrating with me if you were awake, but for now, I’ll simply revel in this sweet victory alone. Having you safe in my arms is enough reward, and when you wake, the true celebration will begin.
Hmm, I wonder what we should do first? Should I take you to the reefs so you can see all of the colourful coral that I’ve grown just for you? Should I present you to the schools of fish that always seek refuge around my house? Get them to revel in your beauty? Or maybe I’ll worship you in the den of our own personal sanctuary, where nothing - no one - will be able to interrupt.
My Beauty.
My Beautiful, Beloved Pearl.
I’ll admit, there’s a certain ring to those names that I enjoy. It calls to me like the cavernous songs of the sirens. An enchantment I can never seem to escape: you.
Not that I want to. 
No. Never. Not since the very first time I laid eyes on you.
You’re addictive, you know that? One glance caught my attention. One melodic note of a spoken word, and I was hooked. Your eyes are deeper than the darkest sea, and I could swim in them forever. You hold me, transfixed, with your gaze whenever you look at me, and I never want it to stop.
Honestly, I can never grow tired of you looking at me. I want you to look at me, and only me. I want to be the first thing you see in the morning when you blink those glorious eyes open, and the last thing you see when you go to sleep at night. I want to wrap you in my arms and hold you close, whispering the sweetest words of all the worlds in your ears, and hear you do the same for me in return.
There is nothing I wouldn’t do for you, Beloved, and I will never hesitate to prove that to you. With me, you will never have to settle for less than what you deserve, for I will always give you every single thing your heart could ever desire.
Fuck- I can still remember the way your body trembled from the very first touch. The more I trailed my arms over your body, letting the tips of my tendrils caress your skin, the more your whole being warmed. You fit so perfectly in my hold, that I long to always touch you - to always be near you, and obey your every whim.
I am but your loyal servant, sent to worship the very depths of your soul. Your entire being calls to me, and I could bathe in your warmth for all eternity. Right now, it’s that warmth that I crave more than anything. That glorious nectar that seeps from between your legs beckons to me. One taste isn’t enough. I need to feel you flooding my every sense once more.
Sweet.
Addictive.
I could spend ages defining it, but nothing could ever truly put into words just how ethereal you are to me.
People always thought my existence was mere myth itself. Rumours and legends only meant to scare those away from pursuing adventure on the high seas. Nothing more than a fable to tell their children at night to ensure they don’t go off swimming in the bay alone.
They have always been, and will always be, wrong.
I’m as real at the tide, as sure as the sand that resides against the ocean floor. There is nothing in these waters as deadly as I am, and all those that oppose us will face my wrath.
Well, where we’re going, we won’t have to worry about being disturbed at all. Plenty of room for the both of us. Plenty of privacy. No one dares disturb that which should be left undisturbed. At least, those smart enough to.
That is, of course, unless I use my magic to let those sirens get a taste of their own medicine. Water echoes even the smallest of sounds, and yours should be heard for miles around. I can still hear your glorious voice calling out my name as you bathed me in your own sacred waters, and I want all to know that you are mine, and I am yours. For all eternity. 
I’ll admit… I’m addicted to you, and I can never get enough. Though, from the way I remember your hands clinging to me that night only days ago, I don’t think you can get enough, either.
Good thing we have forever to spend fully satisfying each other!
Ah… looks like we’re finally getting close to home. I can see the familiar drop off up ahead. Don’t worry, Beloved, there’ll be plenty of air for you to breathe inside. I won’t always have to keep you covered in a veil of magic. Though, I would always like to have an arm around you. Feeling your skin pressed against my own is a sensation unlike any other, and I long to never let you go.
Perhaps I should tidy up a little more before you wake. I always have way too much energy after destroying a ship. Something about adrenaline and all that.
Perhaps when you wake up you could even help me with it… You might be a bit tired and disoriented when you wake, but my magic can help with your exhaustion. You seemed to like that that last time I used it on you.
How else could we have gone as many rounds as we did?
Oh, you flatter me by pulling yourself in closer to me subconsciously when I shift into such a basic form. It easier to move around like a human within my home when it’s drained like this, and besides, I haven’t exactly shown you my entire true form yet. The last thing I want to do is scare you as soon as you wake up. You’ve already suffered the trauma of being stolen away from me today. I don’t want to make things worse.
There. All you need to do is rest now. 
In my arms? Well, who am I to pull away from My Pearl when you’re clinging onto me so tightly in your sleep? 
I truly can never say no to you…
Just rest, Beloved. This creature shall keep you safe, tucked away deeply in his heart for all eternity. Once you open those glorious eyes of yours, our own adventure will start.
Just you and me, forever. 
I promise.
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This piece is based off of a conversation I had with @l3viat8an :p so not all of these ideas are 100% mine and the green text is a direct quote from Ro ♡
My brain is mush so there may be some spelling/grammar errors :/
Banner by @/cafekitsune
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Your temporary stay at the castle was supposed to be a mini vacation from the chaos of the House of Lamentation but in all honesty it was just an excuse for Diavolo to have you all to himself. Without the brother's interference he could simply take you whenever and wherever he pleased. And that included the kitchen while Barbatos was out buying ingredients for a new dessert. Going into the kitchen for a quick snack turned into Diavolo pounding you over the kitchen counter.
This wouldn't have been the first time in your short stay that the poor butler was minding his own business when he was graced with the image of you being folded up or bent over and fucked silly on some random piece of furniture in one of the many rooms of the castle.
The scene that followed was Diavolo offering an apology to Barbatos for letting this happen... again. Diavolo being shocked into silence by Barbatos' suggested method of compensation. You. After all it would only be fair for Barbatos to have his turn to play with you. The only rules set for Diavolo is that he had to watch. He wasn't allowed to interact with the scene unfolding before him.
That's how you found yourself writhing under the touch of Barbatos' skilled fingers. The smug yet calm look on his face almost sinister as he listens to you beg for him to let you cum already. Not even half an hour ago those pretty pleas were for him to just fuck you already but now they were nothing more than broken whines to let you cum. They almost sounded like desperate little prayers to Barbatos' ears as he subjected you to his favorite method of sexual torture.
“See, now you both know how I’ve felt. Not knowing what I’d be walking in on and then only being allowed to watch. A shame isn’t it?”
Bringing you to the edge only to pull away again, Barbatos chuckles when he hears Diavolo letting out an almost frustrated groan. He wants nothing more then to see your face when you cum but Barbatos continues to take that pleasure away from him. There is nothing stopping Diavolo himself from cumming, yet the hand stroking his cock seems to follow Barbatos' pattern of teasing, bringing his movements to a hault whenever Barbatos pulls away and starting up again respectively.
Although Barbatos would love too see you turn into an overstimulated mess under the ruthless pounding of his cock, he much preferred to see you pleading just the way you are now. While one of his hands moves to push his fingers back inside you, the other travels up your body to toy with your already abused nipples. Barbatos looks up from your trembling form to stare at Diavolo, getting you closer then he had before, even rubbing his thumb in quick circles over your clit only to pull away again and click his tongue.
Taglist: @anxious-chick
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birder-of-remnant · 6 months ago
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A Story Done Right
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Kill Bill, The Princess Bride, Blue-Eyed Samurai, Wrath of Khan. Our media is saturated with revenge stories. Even children's tales often have revenge as a sweeping premise (e.g., the countless Star Wars villains as a modern example, but older tales such as Cinderella were even more rife with vindictive messages). And to be honest, I have never cared for this plot type.
Revenge stories are usually violent, merciless, myopic, and pretty disregarding of 'collateral' losses. Not all, but most lack any type of interesting moral symbology and substitute dynamic storylines and complex character development in lieu of exciting action scenes and a prosaic fixation on bloodshed. There are certainly exceptions to this, many of the titles I listed above actually have a lot of great things going for them. But I would say that these qualities are in spite of their focus on revenge and not because of it.
And there are an endless number of animes, movies, books, and other stories based on revenge that simply do not appeal to me (not judging other people if they like violent action media, just not my personal taste). Most of the time, I am just left feeling empty at the end, like Neo after volume 9.
But there is one exception to this theme. One revenge story that leaves me feeling whole, not empty. From the banner image, I think it is pretty obvious which story it is. This is my own highly subjective opinion, but I truly believe that the fight with Adam represents the perfect revenge story. And here is my reasoning.
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Revenge is Not The Hero's Purpose
In too many stories, the premise begins with douchebag 'X' killing damsel 'Y', leading to hero 'Z' killing a lot of henchmen and blowing up a lot of buildings all for the singular purpose of making Mr. X pay. Once they achieve this purpose, they look around aimlessly before wandering off to have a milkshake or play golf or something. Yeah well, this story does not do this. Killing Adam was never the objective for Blake and Yang, because they have actual goals that involve saving people and not just executing some vendetta.
Don't get me wrong. I love redemption stories, I find them so much more satisfying, especially when the character in question has to struggle to overcome the gravity of what they have done (note: a redemption arc does not mean instant forgiveness, it might never end with actual for absolution for what they have done). I love Emerald's story and think it has a lot of interesting twists that it can take. But there are some characters who are just too far gone to save. And Adam fits that perfectly.
He has a tragic backstory and I truly pity him. But he is also an abusive, murdering shitlord who manipulated and groomed Blake (I wouldn't be surprised if he physically or sexually abused her, which is somewhat implied by her frequently defensive body posture, but is not definite). He kills out of spite and represents Yang's demon, who she could have become. It was cathartic to watch him fall, but I am ever so grateful that his demise was not the purpose of Blake and Yang. Because killing him out of spite for what he did to them would not be much different than the way he lashed out at others for the traumas that he has endured. Some might call it justice, but justice and revenge are two sides of the same coin and the edges between them can be blurry.
The point is, Yang and Blake are so much more than Adam. They killed him out of necessity, not out of hate.
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They Are Set on the Future
As I mentioned, I often feel empty at the end of a revenge story. When the villain lies dead within a pool of their own blood and the hero has achieved everything they sought to accomplish, what more is there really? Often, I feel like the story has reached its ending without really achieving anything of note. Often, without really making the world a better place. A plot about revenge is not the same as one about taking someone down to save other people. The former is what Adam wanted and it would have made the world a worse place. But Yang and Blake are protectors. The fight was exhilarating and satisfying, but it ultimately humanized these characters whereas most revenge stories do the opposite, treating human life as cheap entertainment to be killed in the most 'epic' way possible.
But more important, the fight left me feeling excited about the future, rather than feeling burn out from seeing the villain die. Adam was fixated on the past. He was a character of the past. He represented Blake and Yang's trauma, their old demons and fears. He had no further place in their character arcs, because they had evolved into something so much more. Killing Adam was not the end of their story as it is in so many revenge plots. It was simply a new beginning. It felt whole and wholesome. Past, present, and future.
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Because it is the People Who Matter
Ultimately, the fight was never about killing Adam. It was about bringing Yang and Blake together. About having them overcome the demons of their past. About the importance of mental health. About their individual traumas (abandonment issues & PTSD for Yang and Blake's fear of hurting others). About the challenges that LGBTQ+ people face in finding security in a hostile world. It was about these two, fucking amazing characters and the ineffably wondrous relationship that forms between them. One based on actual fucking support, equality, and love.
That is all I have on this right now. Hopefully, I did not offend too many people by criticizing typical revenge stories. But I have been wanting to talk about my love and appreciation of this scene for years. I know there have been so many more people who have discussed these same themes and points before, probably more adroitly than my rambling mess, but this is my rambling mess. Thanks for reading!
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Random side trivia 1: Mandy Patinkin, the actor who played Inigo Montoya in The Princess Bride, is famous for his iconic line, "Hello. My name is Inigo Montoya. You killed my father. Prepare to die." Mandy felt that the scene was symbolic of feelings towards the illness that took his father. But regarding revenge against people, he actually dislikes his iconic line and how it idolizes revenge.
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Random side trivia 2: I love Jeff & Casey William songs and I just love BMBLY (except or that creepy line about the birds and butterflies knowing, wtf). But as an ecologist, I should note that bumblebees do not make honey. Jeff was thinking of European honey bees. Bumblees are cute, fuzzy, chunky super pollinators that live in the ground, in hollow plant stems, or other obscure spots and are either solitary or have very small hives. They virtually never bother people and are super pollinators, actually much better pollinators than honeybees (which are super awesome cool in their own right, but also highly invasive in the western hemisphere and hurt our native pollinators D: And yes, I cherry-picked the ugliest picture of one that I could find). Many bumblebees are endangered, just like our beloved Bumblebees. Save the bees! AND THE BEES!
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simplybakugou · 5 months ago
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The Start of Something New | Mystic Academia: Kirishima's Route
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↝ After a week of preparing while recovering from getting kidnapped, the M.F.A. party is finally here and you finally meet your fellow members with your new boyfriend at your side. 
© simplybakugou — all rights reserved. DO NOT REPOST/REUPLOAD, TRANSLATE, OR EDIT ANY OF MY CONTENT ON HERE OR ONTO ANY OTHER PLATFORM
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⋆ PAIRING: jpop.idol!kirishima x fem!reader ⋆ WARNINGS/TAGS: fluff :) ⋆ WORD COUNT: 3.6K
A/N: Here's the written part for kirishima’s route! it is loosely based on the party scene from zen’s route but i changed it a little. also why did tumblr make my banner look like dog shit i hate this website sometimes... hope you enjoy! :) the kirishima cap is from @eraserhead-transparents
Mystic Academia: Kirishima Eijirou's Route Masterlist
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Everything had to be perfect. That’s what you told yourself over and over as you triple checked to make sure you had everything you needed for the M.F.A. party. After a week-long venture, the day was finally here.  
You waited by Kirishima’s apartment door, checking the time on your watch as you waited for your boyfriend. Boyfriend… It still felt weird to even think of that word. 
“He’s still on the phone, m’am,” one of the security guards, who was looking after you and Kirishima, stated, noticing you fidgeting and checking your watch obsessively.
You smiled and thanked him as you continued to wait, passing the time to check if your fellow M.F.A. members had left any messages in the chatroom.
“Sorry! The chairman finally hung up,” Kirishima said in a rushed and annoyed tone. He adjusted his crimson tie, matching his hair, as he walked out of his bedroom. He looked up and stopped in his tracks as he took in the sight before him. He smiled, his cheeks blushing slightly as he approached you. “You look beautiful.”
You smiled shyly. “Thanks, Eijirou.” As you were about to lean up and give him a kiss on the cheek, you stopped as you realized how many security guards were cramped in Kirishima’s apartment and who were watching.
Kirishima stifled a laugh, understanding exactly what had happened. “We’re ready to head out, guys.” Kirishima turned to the security who were waiting patiently to escort the two of you to the venue.
The guards made their way outside, getting the car ready and making sure there weren’t any fans or press outside of Kirishima’s apartment. Fortunately, there wasn’t anyone outside as it was pretty early in the day to disturb Kirishima and his residence.
He turned to you and smiled, taking your hand in his. “Ready?”
You returned the smile, giving his hand a squeeze. “Yeah.”
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The car pulled up to the venue and you were wide-eyed at the sight of at least twenty paparazzi and media personnels flashing their cameras and crowding around outside of the car. You knew they were here waiting for Kirishima as you heard them mention his name repeatedly. 
“Here.” You turned to the sound of Kirishima’s voice as he slipped on a pair of black sunglasses over your eyes and a black face mask over your mouth. “I’m not gonna let them take your picture, alright? So just stay close to me and we’ll get inside as fast as we can.”
You nodded and the security guards exited the vehicle first, pushing and urging the prying people away from the car to give you and Kirishima enough space to get out. Kirishima opened the door, holding your hand in his and you followed his lead as you both got out of the car.
Immediately you were bombarded with questions. “Who is that?” “Who are you with, Kirishima?” “Is that your girlfriend?” “Is that the same girl from the picture?”
Kirishima kept his eyes glued to the venue door as he took quick and long strides towards it. You could barely keep up, keeping your eyes low to the ground, thankful for the sunglasses that were shielding your eyes from the numerous camera flashes. For what felt like a grueling eternity, the two of you made it safely inside the venue. 
You let out a breath that you were holding out of anxiety. Kirishima put a hand to the small of your back, giving you an apologetic smile. “Are you alright?”
You nodded. “I don’t know how you deal with that constantly, Ei.”
He chuckled and shrugged, removing the mask and glasses from your face. “I’ve been dealing with it for a few years now so I just got used to it.”
Kirishima turned to face the entrance of the venue, taking in all of your preparations. The guests hadn’t arrived yet as your task was to check them off your guestlist. Servers you had hired from previous M.F.A. parties were getting ready to tend to the guests who were to arrive soon.
“This looks incredible, Y/N!” Kirishima exclaimed, his crimson eyes looking around the room. “I can’t believe you arranged all this in a week.”
You smiled sheepishly, nervous beyond belief about your preparations. “You think so? I’m sure it’s nothing compared to the other M.F.A. parties Deku’s hosted.”
“You can’t compare yourself to that. You’ve done so well with the time you got and what you’ve gone through this past week, too.” He took your hand in his, giving your hand a squeeze at the mention of the kidnapping you had undergone. He brought your hand to his lips, planting a soft kiss to the back of it. 
“There you are, Kirishima!” A woman approached the two of you. She was wearing a simple black dress and heels. Her pink hair seemed oddly familiar to you. “Oh my god… Y/N?!”
You blinked in confusion until realization set in. “Mina?”
Mina squealed and threw her arms around you, squeezing your body in a tight embrace. “I can’t believe it’s you!”
You pulled your hand from Kirishima’s and returned the embrace. “I know. It feels so weird to see you in person like this. I got so used to all of us texting.”
Mina pulled away and nodded in agreement. She looked between the two of you. “Are you guys okay? I should’ve known those stupid paparazzi would show up.”
Kirishima nodded. “We’re okay. Bakugou’s security’s outside making sure they don’t go too crazy.”
“How are the guests going to get in? I’m sure it’ll probably be weird to come to the party with all those people outside,” you said with a worried frown.
“Well this venue does have a side entrance. We can make that the main entrance and close off this one,” Mina answered with a quick solution. She turned to you. “Was there anything else that had to be done before we invite the guests in?”
You picked up a clipboard of the guest list and your to-do list from a table you had left it on and scanned the documents. “I wanted to make sure we had enough Hors d'oeuvres and drinks for all of the guests and I think that’s it.”
“I’ll go check on that in the back,” Kirishima offered, already making his way to the backroom where the rest of the staff were before hearing your answer.
“I should get to the side entrance and start letting the guests in,” you stated.
“I’ll come with,” Mina said with a grin. She looped her arm in yours as the two of you walked towards the new entrance of the venue. You opened the huge double doors and propped them open as Mina grabbed the giant red velvet carpet from the side that’s used at every M.F.A. party. She rolled it out of the entrance doors as they adorned the cement stairs.
You and Mina stood by the entrance doors, waiting patiently for the rest of the M.F.A. members and the party guests to arrive. Mina nudged your side with your elbow. “I saw how close you and Kiri were back there.”
Your face instinctively burned up, avoiding her eyes that were practically screaming “give me more details.” “It was nothing.”
Mina snickered at your reaction. “You can say that all you want,” she teased, her tone practically singing her words out.  
Fortunately the first guest began to make their way up the velvet covered steps, saving you from any further embarrassment from Mina’s teasing. You checked them in, recognizing the person as a representative from a dog shelter that Bakugou had suggested for you to invite to the party.
Following the first guest, more and more representatives started approaching the venue, a line forming outside of the entrance. Mina assisted you in checking the guests in. She looked up at the next guest who had stepped forward and rolled her eyes. “This should be good.”
You gave her a confused look and you glanced over at the guest. They were wearing a plain black suit but particularly their blonde hair with a black streak on the side stood out to you. They looked relatively young, definitely younger than Mina and Kirishima. The man approached you, almost glaring at Mina. He looked at you, reading your name tag and widened his eyes. His expression turned into another glare. “This is so not fair.”
“Will you give it up?” Mina questioned, shaking her head at the man. She looked over to you, noticing your unwavering expression when she whispered, “It’s Kaminari.”
This time your eyes widened. “You’re Kaminari?!”
“Hey! Why’d you say it like that?!” Kaminari asked in an annoyed and offended tone.
“Oh, sorry. I just didn't expect you to be so… tall.” Due to the numerous chat rooms you had with your members, you didn’t take into consideration what they would look like in comparison to you. You were even shocked at how tall Kirishima was as well.
“Whatever,” Kaminari huffed, crossing his arms over his chest. “It’s not fair you’re so much prettier than I thought you would be and Kirishima gets you all to himself.”
You sighed. “Look, Kaminari, I–”
“It’s fine,” Kaminari cut you off. He lowered his arms, giving you a small grin. “I was only half-joking in the chat rooms. I’m happy for you two. So we’ll call it a truce… for now.”
You chuckled while Mina rolled her eyes, already accustomed to Kaminari’s behavior. 
“Why isn’t this fucking line moving?!” An irritated voice erupted from behind Kaminari. Two men climbed up the stairs, passing the line. The angered man had a maroon button down adorned with a black vest with matching maroon slacks. His scowl and intimidating aura made it incredibly easy to guess who he was.
“Well I know who that is…” You muttered loud enough for Mina and Kaminari to hear, who laughed.
“Bakugou, you can’t just yell like that in front of all of the guests,” the man beside him scolded. He was wearing a full suit like Kaminari with his black hair combed back and away from his face. The two men approached the three of you.
Bakugou ignored Mina and Kaminari and immediately eyed you, looking you up and down with a plain expression. He, like Kaminari, read your nametag to confirm your identity. “I’m not impressed, new girl.”
“Nice to meet you, too, Bakugou,” you said without an ounce of emotion.
“Dude, can’t you be nice for two seconds?” Mina voiced.
“Yeah, this is your first time meeting Y/N!” Kaminari practically screamed.
“You losers are already fucking pissing me off,” Bakugou grumbled, pushing past all of you as he entered the venue. 
“Well, I think you look great, Y/N. By the way I’m Sero,” Sero introduced himself.
You laughed. “Thanks, Sero. I can’t believe we’re all here like this.”
Kaminari nodded. “I know it’s been only–”
“Stop standing around and get all the guests the fuck inside!” Bakugou’s voice bellowed from inside, making all four of you stand straight and focus on the line of people still waiting to be let in.
“I’ll go and make sure Bakugou doesn’t yell at the staff inside,” Kaminari expressed with an exasperated sigh. “See you guys inside!”
Mina immediately went back to tending to the guests and as you were about to, Sero mentioned, “Oh, before I forget I wanted to let you know I fixed the security system.”
“What?!” Your eyes widened like saucers. “But you said it’d be ready tomorrow if you worked day and night.”
“I did. And I was able to fix it a day earlier,” he stated with a proud smile.
You shook your head. “You make it hard not to worry about you.”
Sero chuckled and shrugged. “I couldn’t sleep knowing you could’ve been in even more danger if you were at the office that day the intruder broke in. And I can’t help but feel like it’s my fault that he got in since he hacked my security system.”
“Sero, it’s not your fault at all. You’re incredible for even making a system and making the chatroom all by yourself. What happened wasn’t your fault.”
“Thanks, Y/N. It means a lot.” He smiled appreciatively. “I’ll see you guys inside.”
As he began to step inside he stopped and spun back around. “Also! I told you I guaranteed you and Kirishima would be a couple before the party.”
You rolled your eyes at his comment. “Just get inside.”
You and Mina worked efficiently to sign every guest in as quickly as possible. You still had to help host the party but thankfully you had Kirishima, Kaminari, Sero, and Bakugou inside assisting you. Initially you were nervous about being overwhelmed with so many tasks and things to take care of but you were beyond thankful to have such incredible people in the organization helping you. Despite all of them each having difficult and demanding jobs in their own right, they were able to put aside time for the M.F.A. party and for you. And it meant the world to you.
“And that was the last one,” Mina declared, happily checking off the last guest. You both sighed in unison, ecstatic that the most difficult part of the event was over. 
You looked down at the checklist, noticing one person was still unaccounted for. “Deku never showed up…”
“I don’t know what’s going on with him.” Mina seemed disappointed. “He said he would come. I hope everything’s okay.”
“He seems busy with other things. I’m sure he wouldn’t miss an M.F.A. party unless it was important,” you said, doing your best to reassure Mina.
She nodded, smiling gratefully. “You’re right as always, Miss Y/N.”
You rolled your eyes in false annoyance. Just as the two of you were about to join the rest of the M.F.A. members and the guests inside, the sound of rushed voices and stamping of feet stopped you in your tracks. You and Mina turned to see what the commotion was. The paparazzi that were at the main entrance had come and bombarded the side entrance, getting their cameras ready as a black tinted car pulled up in front of the side entrance. You were taken aback by the two men that emerged from the vehicle, causing the cameras to flash intensely. 
You recognized the man with jet black hair as Tokoyami and the man beside him with two toned white and red hair as Todoroki, Kirishima’s fellow HIRO members. Kirishima hadn’t mentioned that they were coming to the party. You looked over at Mina who was just as surprised as you to see her clients’ arrival. 
They hurriedly rushed up the stairs. Before you could say hello and introduce yourself, Mina grabbed your arm and pulled you inside due to the paparazzi stampeding up the stairs after the boys. She knew the two of you would get trampled on if she didn’t get you guys out of that situation. You assisted her in quickly shutting the double doors before any of those intruding pests could barge in and ruin your first party. Fortunately Mina moved and acted fast enough to prevent such a thing from happening and you were incredibly thankful.
“You guys could’ve warned us before coming here! It was already difficult trying to get Kirishima in without getting mobbed!” Mina scolded, immediately in manager mode as she looked back and forth between the two HIRO members.
“Sorry, we just thought we should come and support you guys and Eijirou,” Todoroki explained with Tokoyami nodding in agreement. He looked over to you, giving you a soft smile that immediately made you flustered. Kirishima had told you about Todoroki being the fan favorite for his handsome features; not that he could ever compare to Kirishima. “You must be Y/N. We’ve heard a lot about you from Eijirou.”
“Yes, it seems he’s very fond of you and we’re happy for both of you,” Tokoyami stated matter-of-factly. 
“Thank you for your kind words. It’s so great to meet both of you,” you answered happily.
“Alright, you two. Go mingle. Y/N has to host this party,” Mina said, shooing the two away. They waved goodbye to you as they listened to Mina’s words. “Sorry about them. I didn’t think they’d show up like that.”
“It’s okay, Mina. I’m glad they wanted to come to the party in the first place.”
Mina opened her mouth to say something but was interrupted by Kirishima. He grabbed your hand, out of breath from trying to find you in the crowd of people that had filled the venue. “Sorry, Mina. Can I steal Y/N for a second?”
“Yeah, yeah. You two lovebirds go off now,” she replied with the widest grin. You knew she was loving every second of your relationship.
“Thanks.” Kirishima led you away from the main entrance hall of the venue, pulling you to one of the private dining areas in the back of the venue.
“Is it okay for us to be here like this? I have to help host the guests,” you remarked, looking behind you and peering into the hall.
“It’s alright. I asked Bakugou to help host. He did yell at me but I know he’ll help out.” Kirishima laughed as he recalled the encounter.
“What did you want to tell me, Ei?”
“Earlier before we left to come here, I was on the phone with the chairman.” You nodded, already aware of this. “Well I called him because I wanted to talk about us.”
Your eyes broadened slightly. “I thought we agreed to tell him later on about our relationship…”
“Yeah I know but I wanted him to know. So I told him we’re dating, that I was dating the woman in the picture that went viral and that I didn’t care what he had to say. I’m not leaving HIRO and I refuse to leave you. I knew he would give me an ultimatum and I wasn’t going to let him do that to me.”
Your heart swelled at his words. You felt guilty for putting Kirishima in a position of having to choose between his career and his love life but you also knew it was due to the unfair demands from his company.
“I already told Shouto and Fumikage– Todoroki and Tokoyami, that I was going to tell the chairman and they agreed.” Kirishima paused, taking both of your hands in his as he smiled at you in a way that could melt you into a puddle. “He said he’s okay with us dating as long as we don’t get caught like last time.”
“What?! Are you serious?” You exclaimed, overjoyed by the outcome. You threw your arms around his shoulders, embracing him tightly. He reciprocated the gesture, holding you close to him as he nestled his head into the crook of your neck. 
Kirishima pulled away from you, still holding you close to him. “I’m not going to lie, this is probably going to be stressful and hard. We won’t be able to go out on dates in public like a regular couple and if we do go out it’ll have to be in disguises. I’m sorry, Y/N… I feel selfish asking this much from you but… I like you and I care about you in a way that I want to be selfish and keep you to myself.”
You smiled shyly at him. You wrapped your arms around his neck, looking intently into his eyes. “I have no regrets because I want to be with you, Eijirou. There’s nothing I want more than to be with you.”
Kirishima’s face broke out into a grin. He was frightened for a moment that you would call it off right then and there. He wouldn’t blame you; it was going to be nearly impossible to not get caught and he knew the chairman partly allowed it because he assumed you and Kirishima would get caught like the first time. But Kirishima had every intention of keeping you safe and to himself.
He closed the gap between you two, wrapping his arms around your waist as he pulled you to him. He sealed his lips over yours gingerly. His lips were soft and you couldn’t help but smile against him. He was everything you could’ve ever asked for in a partner and you didn’t know how you became so lucky to have him in your life. You both pulled away, grinning and laughing at one another. 
“Get a room!” Kaminari’s voice interrupted the moment and you both whipped your heads to the sound of his voice to see he was accompanied by Bakugou, Sero, and Mina, all standing by the entrance of the room as they witnessed your exchange.
They were smiling as widely and intently as you and Kirishima had, yes even Bakugou. Kirishima laughed, running over to them. Sero patted him on the back and Kaminari and Bakugou looked genuinely happy for you. Mina went to your side, squealing on into a tangent about how cute you guys were and how ecstatic she was to see her childhood friend and current client in a happy, healthy relationship.
A week ago you didn’t have a place to live. Now, you had a new home, four new friends, and a boyfriend who put his life on the line to save you. It all felt like a fantasy, one that you could only dream of. 
It was the start of something new… something you couldn’t wait to have in your life forever.
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A/N: AND SHE’S FINALLY FINISHED. did this take me two years? yes but we won’t talk about that lol. i appreciate those of you who stayed with this series even through my hiatus. i needed to genuinely stay away from tumblr for a little bit to find the motivation to write and i'm happy i did cause i was finally able to finish kirishima’s route! if you’re not going to read the other routes, thank you so much for reading! kaminari’s route shall be posted soon!
98 notes · View notes
rubyreduji · 1 year ago
Text
of boobs and basses — ljh
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summary: jihoon gets to meet his favorite rockstar, things only go up from there
tags: smut (minors dni!), fluff, idol!woozi, rockstar!reader warnings: smoking, explicit sex, multiple smut scenes, multiple orgasms, praise, fingering, biting and marking, oral, cum swallowing, finger sucking, spanking, hair pulling, creampie, crying, choking, squirting, over stimulation wc: 13.3k an: yes the reader and her band are based off of maneskin and vic de angelis. yes there is plot (but also a fair amount of smut ok). yes i love the banner thank you for noticing. here’s the playlist for this fic
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Jihoon hates flying. Not because he hates traveling or because he’s afraid of heights, no he just finds it boring. Luckily he has WiFi and he can put his headphones on and sleep through the flight.
He’s sitting next to Seokmin who seems just as restless as Jihoon is, though Jihoon is a bit better at covering it up.
“Hyung, what are you listening to?” Seokmin leans over to try and look at Jihoon’s phone. His phone displays that he’s listening to Backseat Sex by LADYKILLER. “Oh, that’s the band with that girl you’re obsessed with. The one with the boobs.”
The words out of Seokmin’s mouth make Jihoon blush and he snatches his phone away. Seokmin isn't exactly wrong though.
Y/N L/N. Bassist for the rock band LADYKILLER. Jihoon may have a giant crush on you.
You and your band are well known for your ‘edgy’ image and your sexual stage presence. It’s not uncommon to see you on stage sporting nothing but pasties and a fishnet top. Sometimes no pasties at all. It seems these days he can’t even go on Twitter without seeing clips of you performing on stage topless, not that Jihoon minds.
That’s not why Jihoon has a crush on you though. You write most of your band’s songs, and to Jihoon nothing is more attractive than someone who understands music. You also just seem like a cool person, based off of interviews you’ve done and your fan interaction Jihoon has seen on social media. The way you handle fame is very different from how idols do, he likes seeing how free you are with your self expression.
Your music isn’t normally something Jihoon would like, but he saw one of your guys’ performances on Twitter and has been hooked since. Your stage presence is incredible and the chemistry of your group adds to that.
“Hyung this music is really…intense,” Seokmin says to Jihoon. Jihoon isn’t sure how much time has passed since Seokmin last spoke to him but when Jihoon looks over he can see that Seokmin has his earbuds in, listening to one of your songs.
Ex-Fling, off of your Razor Sharp Rampage album. It’s one of Jihoon’s favorite albums. 
“You really enjoy this stuff?” Seokmin asks.
Jihoon flushes a bit, “Yeah. Their lyrics are good.”
Seokmin gives him a skeptical look. “If you say so, hyung.”
As soon as the plane lands in New York, the boys are swept away to the Radio City Music Hall. The VMAs aren’t until tomorrow, but Seventeen is scheduled to do their rehearsals today.
“You guys are a bit early, so you can just wait around and we’ll call you when we’re ready,” one of the stage managers tells the group before running off.
The boys break off to go kill some time but Jihoon stays backstage, watching the way everyone runs around getting things ready. Jihoon’s eyes scan the area around him, looking to see who else is performing tomorrow night. He sees mostly backstage hands until his eyes land on one certain person and Jihoon feels his jaw drop a bit.
This cannot be real.
Jihoon feels like he can’t breathe. This has to be some kind of hallucination or something because there is no way this is actually happening to him.
Y/N L/N. Twenty feet away from him. Dressed in cut off shorts and a tank top. Jihoon’s mouth goes dry.
He’s not sure why he’s so surprised. This is one of the biggest music events in America, and you are a popular American musician. Still, even if he was expecting you to be here, he didn’t expect you to be here. In the same vicinity as him. Even thinking about it makes Jihoon’s ears turn red. He feels like a flustered school boy again.
He was just talking about you to Seokmin and now here you are, right in front of him, looking like a dream. Jihoon gets embarrassed just thinking about how many times he’s stared at photos and videos of you. 
You turn in the direction Jihoon is standing and your eyes light up when you see him. You start to walk towards him and Jihoon can feel his heart thumping in his skull. Surely you’re not walking over to him.
“Oh my god, you’re Woozi!”
You know who he is. Jihoon wants to pass out.
“I’m a fan of your work. I’m not usually a big K-Pop fan, but I like your stuff. Especially the solo you put out. Ruby? That was sick,” you tell him. “Sorry, I’m Y/N. Bassist for LADYKILLER.”
“I-I know,” Jihoon says. He’s thankful Vernon has been helping him brush up on his English. Too bad Vernon can’t help him with how shaky his voice sounds. “I’m also a fan.”
This seems to shock you a bit and an intrigued look crosses your face. “Oh yeah? That’s cool to hear.”
“Y/N! Come on, we’ve got soundchecks!” Jihoon looks over to see one of your bandmates (Tommy, the drummer) calling for you. A bit of dejection fills Jihoon. He wanted to talk with you more.
“Ah, sorry Woozi. It was nice meeting you. I’ll see you later!” You wave goodbye to the idol before running off towards Tommy. It isn’t until you’re out of sight that Jihoon realizes he didn’t say bye back.
“Jihoon-ah! Where have you been?” His members bombard him when he finds them waiting in a green room.
“I-I think I just met the love of my life,” Jihoon mutters.
Everyone looks at him a bit incredulously. It’s Seungcheol who finally speaks up. “What do you mean Jihoon?”
“She’s here, and I talked to her. Y/N.” Jihoon feels like he’s in a trance.
“Yo, from LADYKILLER? I love that band!” It’s Vernon who says this. Of course Vernon likes the rock band with the hot bassist who’s boobs are always on display. That’s so Vernon.
“The girl who’s always showing off her tits?” Soonyoung asks. They’d get canceled so fast if the Carats heard them talking like this.
“Stop saying that about her!” Jihoon’s face is probably red as a tomato right now.
“Is it…not the truth?”
“What girl is showing off her boobs?”
Jihoon wants to curl up in a ball and die.
“Jihoon-hyung has a crush on the bassist from the rock band LADYKILLER. Y/N L/N. Her band does a lot of nude stuff,” Vernon finally explains. “Their music is sick as fuck, but probably not in any of your guys’ taste.” 
“She’s so pretty,” Jihoon mumbles.
“I hope I get to meet them too,” Vernon says. “James is so cool.” James. The guitarist. Jihoon thinks that he would get along well with Vernon.
The other members are all still staring at Jihoon and he wishes they would stop. Yes, he has a crush on a girl who is always topless. Can they please move on.
As if saved by the bell, a voice comes on one of the speakers.
“Seventeen please report to the stage. Seventeen please report to the stage.”
The boys all move to get to the stage, right as your band is finishing up. You wave at Jihoon when you see them approaching and shoot him a wink before following your band off the stage. And yeah, that definitely does things to Jihoon.
For the rest of the day and into the next Jihoon can’t stop thinking about you. He spends his whole night rewatching every one of your music videos, every interview you’ve done, and all the videos Jihoon has saved of your performances from when you were on tour last year. He might have an obsession.
Jihoon would probably have spent the whole morning doing the same too if he wasn’t taken to get ready for the award show. When the group gets to the venue they’re bombarded with cameras but once they get past those they are able to take their seats. Jihoon’s eyes scan the area quickly to see if he can spot your band, but he comes up short.
Soon the actual award show is starting and Jihoon doesn’t pay much attention to most of the awards, other than clapping when he should and noticing a few of his favorite artists when they come up in nominations or when they do their acceptance speeches.
When the time comes Jihoon gets up and goes backstage before their performance. He gets mic'd and then they’re being lined up to go out on stage. As much as Jihoon loves performing, he always finds it a bit strange to perform for people who aren’t Carats.
Jihoon does know that there is one Carat in the audience, so he dedicates his performance to you. The song goes too quickly for Jihoon’s liking and he thinks about how he can’t wait to be on stage with Carats again as soon as he can.
After their performance a few more awards are given, and Seventeen wins the award for the Best K-Pop and Joshua does all of the taking, as per usual.
Jihoon’s focus is lost again, until the announcer says a band name catches his attention.
“Next up to the stage with their hit single ‘Bruised Knees’: LADYKILLER!” The lights on the stage come up to reveal your band standing there.
Jihoon feels like a bit of a pervert from the way his cock twitches in his pants the second he lays eyes on you. You’re dressed in shiny black thigh high boots, a pleated mini skirt with a few chains and belts over it, and a button up shirt that only covers your shoulders and arms. Necklaces adorn your neck and dip down between your breasts that are out in the open. The only thing conserving any of your modesty is the silver star-shaped covers on your nipples. 
Attached to your body is your iconic bass guitar. It’s sleek in a dark blue color. The rest of your band gifted it to you right before your first tour. You look good with it. If Jihoon is being honest you look like sex on a stick and he’s doing everything in his power not to pop a boner right now.
You have a smirk on your face and Jihoon swears you’re staring directly at him. You continue to stare at Jihoon throughout the whole song, which is about rough sex and giving head, like most of LADYKILLER’s songs are about. The songs that you write.
The special thing about your song ‘Bruised Knees’ is that it’s sung by your lead singer, Luka, but also you, with you singing the second verse and the bridge and sharing the chorus with Luka. The rasp in your voice goes straight to Jihoon’s cock and he really hopes that you (or anyone else) can’t notice. 
You usually do backing vocals on the songs, but it’s rare for you to get your own part of the song and maybe Jihoon is biased but he definitely thinks you should sing more. Or maybe not because it’s really turning Jihoon on and he is in public and has a reputation to upkeep. 
When you’re done with your song you wink at Jihoon again and yeah, Jihoon really is screwed because how is it possible someone can look so good. 
By the end of the night your band wins both Best Alternative and Group of the Year. During both of your acceptance speeches Jihoon can’t pull his eyes away from you or the grin you have on your face.
When the award ceremony finally ends everyone is left to mingle. Most of Seventeen goes to greet some of the other K-Pop groups in attendance, but before Jihoon can join them, you’re approaching him with James in tow.
“Hey Woozi! Congrats on your award. This is my bandmate, James, he was wondering if he could meet Vernon?”
Before Jihoon can even respond, Vernon pipes up from behind him. “Yo! You’re James from LADYKILLER! Huge fan of your work man!” Vernon and James quickly engage in a conversation and Jihoon thinks it’s a little funny how similar the two are.
“Your performance was very good,” Jihoon tells you.
“Oh, wow, thanks! You guys too! I’ve seen videos of you guys performing, but seeing it live is a whole new experience. You guys are amazing.”
“Says the winner of Group of the Year.”
You scoff a bit embarrassed. You decide to change the topic. “Are you guys going to the after party?”
“After party?”
“Yeah. It’s basically an excuse for a bunch of musicians to get drunk together and do stupid shit. I’m only going because Tommy wanted to, but it would be cool to see you there. Your whole group too. No big deal if you don’t, but it would be nice to talk more.”
“Ah, yeah, maybe,” Jihoon says. He says maybe but he has already made up his mind that he is going to be there, even if he has to drag Vernon to go with him. There is no way he’s going to miss out on a chance to talk to you.
Vernon doesn’t take any dragging as he happily accepts to join, as it’s more chance for him to talk to the rest of your band. Joshua also decides to tag along with the promise to Seungcheol that no one’s going to get into any trouble.
Once inside the building, it’s clear this is a full on party. The air smells like alcohol and a wide variety of celebrities stand around talking to each other or dancing to the music. It doesn’t take long for James to find Jihoon, Vernon, and Joshua.
He shoots a smirk at Jihoon before telling him, “Y/N’s out on the balcony if you want to find her.” With that he leaves with Vernon and Joshua in tow. 
Jihoon isn’t sure how to take the interaction and if James is giving him a hint or not. Either way Jihoon slips through all of the bodies in the room before finding his way to the balcony. There are a few people milling around but it isn’t hard to find you.
You’re still in your outfit from earlier and you’re standing talking to another guy who’s very close to you. A cigarette is placed between your fingers and Jihoon stares as you wrap your lips around it to take a drag. The way the smoke leaves your lips and blows into the guy’s face is…quite sexy to Jihoon.
Your eyes flit away from the guy for a second and land on Jihoon. Your face lights up as soon as you see him and you quickly leave the guy to approach Jihoon. 
“Woozi! You came!” You smell like cigarette smoke and perfume and Jihoon has never been super into smoking, but the smell is intoxicating coming off of you.
“Jihoon,” Jihoon blurts out.
“What?”
“Call me Jihoon, please.”
You grin. “Okay Jihoon. Are you here alone?”
“Vernon and Joshua are here, but they’re talking to your band.”
“Ah, I see. Well then I guess you’re stuck here with me.” You send him a teasing smirk before taking another drag of your cigarette. The guy you were talking to earlier seems to realize you’re done with him and he shoots a glare at Jihoon before walking back into the building. 
You lean against the railing of the balcony and look at Jihoon with a sultry look. You look so damn good right now in your stage outfit with your cigarette placed between your fingers and the moonlight shining down on you. Jihoon is glad he’s outside because he’s already having trouble breathing and he’s sure it would be worse inside.
“So Jihoon,” you reach to grab his wrist and pull him closer, “what’s a big time K-Pop idol like you doing liking a nasty band like mine?” His skin tingles under the touch of your warm hand against his wrist and he wants to remember this feeling forever.
“I uhm…” Jihoon’s face is hot as he tries to figure out what to say to you. “I saw a video of you guys performing and I enjoyed it. I enjoy how you write all of your songs.”
“Oh? What video was it?” There’s a teasing tone to your voice and Jihoon knows what you’re insinuating. Yes, the video he watched did include you topless. But he swears that wasn’t what interested him. Before he can sputter out an answer, you laugh. “I’m teasing you. I’m well aware of the…allure of my band.” 
Jihoon wants to tell you that he thinks you’re more than just all of the sex appeal but before he can form the words he gets distracted. You’re staring at him intently, your eyes focused on his face. 
“Y/N?”
“Can I tell you a secret?” Jihoon nods. “It’s a little embarrassing to admit, but I kind of have a crush on you.”
Jihoon freezes. Did he hear that right? You, Y/N L/N, have a crush on Jihoon? 
“Ah, I knew that was weird to admit,” you mumble after Jihoon doesn’t respond. 
“No, no, I have a crush on you too!” Jihoon blurts out. 
“O-oh!”
“I’ve been so nervous every time you’ve talked to me,” Jihoon tells you. He’s still nervous. His heart feels like it’s about to burst out of his chest. 
“That’s…so flattering, oh my god. You’re just so talented and cool and pretty. You’re so pretty,” you say. 
Jihoon grins. “I think you’re prettier.” 
“I- I like that,” you whisper. “I’m really only called hot or sexy, so pretty is nice.” 
“You’re beautiful to me Y/N.” Jihoon reaches out to tuck a piece of your hair behind your ear. “I think I’m going to die if I don’t kiss you right now.” 
You quickly stub out your cigarette before grabbing Jihoon’s hand. “Not here.” 
You pull him back inside and you two weave between people before going deeper into the building, away from the crowd. You and Jihoon find an empty hallway and you stop and face Jihoon. His hand is still clamped together with yours as you two stare at each other.
“You can uh, you can kiss me now,” you tell him in a soft voice.
“Okay.”
Jihoon hesitates, just for a second, before leaning in and capturing your lips with his. Jihoon swears that sparks fly the second your lips touch. The kiss starts out gentle but quickly becomes heated and Jihoon pushes you up against the wall, making you let out a low moan into Jihoon’s mouth.
Your fingers bury into the hair at the nape of Jihoon’s neck and you pull him closer. Your bodies are warm as they’re pressed together and Jihoon’s hands run all over your stomach, relishing in the feeling of your warm skin under his fingertips.
Jihoon swipes his tongue against your lips and you open up, letting Jihoon lick into your mouth. Your fingers tighten around Jihoon’s hair, pulling a bit, as you let out small whines from the back of your throat.
Jihoon isn’t usually one for hook-ups, but that doesn’t mean he’s completely inexperienced. He slots his knee between your legs and you automatically grind down against him. Jihoon can already feel the heat of your cunt against his leg and his cock stirs in his pants.
You two break away the kiss. You’re panting but Jihoon doesn’t take a break, leaning in to kiss at your neck. He sucks at the skin, trailing down your neck until your barrage of necklaces stops him. His hands slide up your torso to your exposed chest and he cups your tits. Jihoon kneads at your chest and you let out a soft sigh.
“How many times have you gotten off to pictures of my tits?”
Jihoon takes a shaky breath, “Too many times to count.”
“Fuck, that’s so hot,” you mumble. Your hips are still grinding down against his leg and Jihoon is sure his pant leg is wet by now. “Jihoon, I need you.”
Jihoon's cock is hard in his pants and he doesn't think he's ever been so needy before. Just as Jihoon is about to pull his cock out, his phone rings. Jihoon grabs his phone to dismiss the call, but then he sees it's from Joshua, along with about two dozen texts.
Jihoon groans and picks up the call. "What?"
"Where are you? Seungcheol says our manager is looking for us, we gotta get back right now."
"Right now?"
"Yes. Meet us at the front and if you're not there in three minutes I'm hunting you down."
The phone call ends and Jihoon sighs.
"Ah, you have to leave, don't you?" You ask.
"Yeah."
You look sad for a moment before you perk up. "How long are you guys in town?"
"A few more days. This is kind of a vacation for us."
"Great! Here." You grab Jihoon's phone out of his hand and quickly type something. "That's my number. Maybe we can meet up later in the week. Since you're blue balling me right now," you tease.
"Y-yeah, okay."
"See you later Jihoon." You press a quick kiss to his cheek. Jihoon bids you goodbye and makes his way to the front of the building, hoping Joshua and Vernon don’t notice the straining bulge in his pants.
The next day the rest of Seventeen are planning what they want to do, but Jihoon is texting you. He worries that it might be too soon to ask to see you today, since you just saw him yesterday, but you tell Jihoon you’d be more than happy to see him today.
You send Jihoon a text with an address and when Jihoon pulls it up in maps, it comes up with an apartment complex. Your apartment complex. Jihoon suddenly remembers that your band is New York City based. 
Jihoon is glad that you two will be out of the public eye, but the idea of being alone with you in your apartment drives Jihoon crazy. He really hopes you two can finish what you started last night. After all, you’re not the only one who got blue balled.
Jihoon ignores the rest of his member’s questions as he slips a cap and a mask on and leaves in one of the SUVs, giving the driver your address. Your apartment is closer to the outskirts of the city, but it’s a nicer building. Jihoon is sure that only people who have a lot of money can afford to live here, which makes Jihoon feel better about privacy concerns.
Jihoon puts in the code you gave him to get into the building and he makes his way to your apartment. When he knocks on the door you open it within a few seconds.
“Jihoon!” You grin wide at him. “Come in!”
Your apartment is nice. It’s large with lots of windows and modern interior design. 
“I feel underdressed,” Jihoon mutters. He’s in just sweats and a t-shirt.
“Don’t worry about that. I’m pretty underdressed as well.” You’re in a soft looking skirt and a tank top. You look really good. Jihoon has to look away when he notices you’re not wearing a bra, your nipples pebbling under the cloth of your shirt.
Jihoon knows why he asked you to hang out, but he feels too awkward to jump right into it. You seem to share the same sentiment as you move into the kitchen and grab two cans of coke out of your fridge, handing one to Jihoon. You two move into your living room area to the couch.
You have a few things scattered around and there’s pieces of sheet music all over your coffee table and couch.
“Sorry about that,” you tell him as you pick the papers up before sitting down. “Those are just songs I’m failing to write.”
“Failing?”
“Yeah. I can’t seem to finish them. I get ideas and then get caught up on stupid things,” you say with a shrug.
“I could look at them for you, if you want.” The words leave Jihoon’s mouth before he realizes what he’s saying. “Only if you want me to! I don’t want to overstep or-”
“No, that would be perfect! Could you? Let me get my bass!” You jump up and run into a room before emerging with your signature bass guitar. 
It’s even prettier up close and it looks loved but well taken care of. Jihoon’s gaze doesn’t falter as he watches you play. You yourself are lost in the music, focusing on playing and singing the parts of your song you have finished. Your fingers glide up and down the next of your guitar as you tap your foot against the ground to keep beat. With the sun shining through your open windows, you look beautiful like this. Completely in your element.
Jihoon has to remind himself of the task at hand and when he starts to really listen, he realizes it’s very different from the normal stuff your band does. It’s still just as explicit as your normal work, but it feels more raw and visceral. He brings it up when you’re done.
“Oh yeah, this is actually music for a solo project I’m working on,” you tell him. “I’m really not supposed to tell anyone, but I trust you Jihoon.” Yeah, his stomach does flutter a bit. “When I write I can usually just focus on all of the sexual stuff, but I’m trying to add in more emotions with it, but I’m kind of struggling a lot.” 
“What you have is good. Let me hear some of the other stuff you’re working on and we can go from there.”
That’s how you and Jihoon end up spending a good part of the day working on music together. Jihoon doesn’t mind though, he loves music and something about writing and composing with you feels right. Both of your minds work in different ways, but combined you are able to piece together the songs until they’re perfect.
It’s comfortable, being in your apartment with you, doing the thing he loves. It feels like you two have known each other a lot longer than two days. You two just…click and it makes Jihoon feel warm when he thinks about it.
“Jihoon, thank you so much for doing this for me,” you tell him after you two finish another song. “I know this probably isn’t what you expected to do today.”
“It’s okay, really. I’m really enjoying myself. I think I’d enjoy doing anything with you.”
“Jihoon,” you say softly. You’re staring at him again, with your alluring eyes that just draw Jihoon in. “Can I kiss you?”
“Yes,” Jihoon breathes out and before he can even finish his breath, you’re leaning in. 
You cup Jihoon’s face, kissing him fiercely as you do. Jihoon nearly topples off the couch, but he grabs on to you, kissing you back. Your lips clash together as you do your best to taste each other as much as you can. As much as Jihoon loves song writing, he can’t deny that your songs are very sexually charged, and it’s definitely gotten him worked up in the hours he’s been here.
You two pull away panting, and you rest your forehead against Jihoon’s. “Do you want to…”
“Yes,” Jihoon nods, jostling your head as well. You grin and stand up, grabbing Jihoon’s hand to drag him behind you as you make your way to your bedroom, just like how you dragged him into the empty hallway last night. Hopefully today there won’t be any interruptions.
Once in the bedroom Jihoon grabs your waist and pulls you back into him, your lips crashing together. Your lips are so soft and Jihoon wants to kiss you forever. He reaches up to paw at your chest, feeling your pebbled nipple under his palm. He squeezes a bit too hard at one point and you gasp into Jihoon’s mouth and he decides he wants to get you to do that again.
Jihoon pushes you back until you fall onto the bed and he can crawl over you. He helps you tug off your tank top before leaning down to take one of your tits right into his mouth, his tongue and teeth gently playing with your nipple.
You squirm under his ministrations and Jihoon slots his thigh between your legs so you can grind against him like last time. You seem appreciative of the rough feeling of his knee against you as you roll your hips against him.
“J-Jihoon,” you moan. 
Your tits are slick with his saliva now and he tugs at your nipple with his teeth before releasing it. When he looks down at you he lets out a soft groan, his heavy cock stirring in his boxers. Your hair is already mussed a bit and your face looks warm as you stare up at him with soft eyes. Your bare chest is littered in forming purple and red marks and Jihoon watches as it rises and falls with your breaths. Jihoon can’t help but revel in the fact this is for him only. No fans or cameras or anything else to see you like this, bare and vulnerable.
Jihoon pulls his shirt over his head, tossing it to the side, and he watches the way your eyes trail down his pale, chiseled torso. Your hands reach up for him and you pull him back down on top of you, his weight settling on your body. Your fingers trail up and down his bare skin, your mouth pressed hot and firm against his.
Your leg is thrown around Jihoon’s waist and he rolls his hips into yours, his hard cock brushing up against your wet core. You mewl into Jihoon’s mouth, your fingers digging into the muscles on his back.
“F-fuck Jihoon, please. Please touch me,” you beg, your voice high pitched and desperate, making it impossible to say no (not that Jihoon would).
Jihoon peels his body away from yours once more before hooking his fingers into your skirt and pulling it down your legs, leaving you in just your underwear. Jihoon nearly starts drooling when he sees the lacy, red panties hugging your hips. His fingers trail up your leg and he rubs a thumb over your hip bone against the rough fabric.
“I thought you said you were underdressed. You wore these just for me?”
You nod. “Thought you’d like them.”
“I do. Though, I think I’d like them better off.” With that he tugs the fabric down your legs as well, discarding them on your floor.
You gasp when Jihoon pushes your legs apart so he can get a better look at what’s between them. Your pussy is already shiny and slick with your arousal, begging to be filled by something. Jihoon reaches out and trails his fingertips against your puffy folds, prodding and rubbing in a way that’s nothing but teasing.
You squirm under Jihoon’s touch, but Jihoon just ignores you, too busy admiring how pretty your pussy looks right now. His fingers slip between your folds and dip down into your opening, only to pull back a second later. When his fingers emerge they’re covered in your arousal and he uses the slick to slide his fingers up your slit, catching on your clit. You intake a sharp breath as your body stiffens.
Jihoon grins and starts to rub your clit in gentle circles. Slow and almost lazily, his fingers go around and around with no real vigor. Jihoon can see the way your pussy is leaking, dripping down onto your bed. You’ve been letting out soft whines as Jihoon touches you, impatient for him to do more. 
After what probably feels like an eternity to you, Jihoon finally slips his fingers lower before pushing two right into you. Your cunt is well slicked up and greedily accepts the digits being slipped inside. Your walls are warm and soft around Jihoon’s fingers and he slowly drags his fingers out of you before slamming them back in. He juts his fingers in and out of you as he strokes your walls with his fingertips. 
To Jihoon it’s not much different than playing the piano the way his fingers move skillfully in precise ways to hit all the right places. In a way this is also like making music; the sound of your soft moans and pants filling the air, mixing with the slight squeak of your bed frame and the wet slap of his fingers sliding in and out of your cunt. It’s erotic and intimate and beautiful.
Below him, your body is shaking on the bed. Your fingers grasp at the sheets below you as your hips rut up into Jihoon’s palm. Jihoon’s whole hand is drenched now and his wrist is starting to ache, but he doesn’t dare stop.
“Fuck, fuck, Ji,” you mumble as your legs start to buck into the air. Jihoon pushes your hips down with his free hand and you let out a long moan as your walls clench down on Jihoon’s fingers as this thumb rapidly rubs at your clit.
Your hips roll against Jihoon’s hand for a few more seconds before your body relaxes into the bed. Jihoon stares down at you in awe. You grin up at him.
“That was…so good,” you say, still a bit breathless. “But…I think I need more. Fuck me, please?”
There is no way Jihoon is going to say no to a proposal like that. You direct him in the direction of your condom stash and Jihoon quickly shucks off his pants and boxers. He’s about to start rolling on the condom when he hears you gasp.
“You’re huge,” you say. When Jihoon looks up, you’re staring directly at his crotch. Jihoon’s aware is he…well endowed. His cock is about six inches long, but wide in girth. “Shit Jihoon, get in me right now.”
Jihoon chuckles and continues to roll on the condom before climbing back into the bed. He pushes you back against the mattress and leans down to kiss you. While your lips are still locked together he hikes one of your legs around his waist before lining himself up to your entrance. He rubs his head against your folds before finally pushing the tip in. 
Jihoon’s mouth breaks off of yours and he trails wet kisses down your neck to your chest where he latches onto one of your breasts. His hips rut into you, slowly shoving his fat cock into your desperate cunt as you dig your fingers into his triceps. 
Your walls hug him tightly and it makes his mind a bit fuzzy, his only focus being on you under him. Your scent floods Jihoon’s nose as he buries his face into your tits and he wants nothing more than to eat you whole. He mouths at your peaked nipples, nipping and licking everywhere he can, marking you with his love bites.
Jihoon swears he’s the luckiest man in the world, being able to lay here in your bed, marking up your tits. How many photos has he seen of them? How many people has he seen thirsting over you because of them? And here he is, being able to devour them all for himself.
Inside of you, his cock pounds at your walls, stretching you open. The rhythm Jihoon set is quick, but not brutal, and the drag of his cock in and out of you leaves both of you with a pleasured feeling coursing through your bodies.
“God, you’re so hot,” you moan out. “Used to dream about moments like this. I would watch compilations of you grinding on the floor to the Good to Me choreo.”
The words send a flush to Jihoon’s already warm face. He’s not sure if he should be embarrassed or find that incredibly hot. Maybe a bit of both. All he knows is that he’ll never be able to think of that song the same anymore.
Everything about you is intoxicating to the idol. Particularly in this moment though, the way you keep whimpering his name is driving him mad. Jihoon’s grip on your hips tightens as he rocks into you harder, his cock slamming into your sweet spot, making you cry out even harder.
Jihoon can feel his balls get heavier, ready to cum. He latches his mouth onto your neck and sucks hard as his fingers flit down to rapidly play with your clit. He’s hoping to get you to finish before him, but his orgasm hits him by surprise and his hips are stuttering as he releases his load into the condom. He doesn’t dare stop fucking into you though, even after he’s milked himself dry with your pussy. Jihoon doesn’t let himself rest until your body is shaking under him, your cunt clenching down as your nails dig into Jihoon’s skin. 
When you’re finally coming down from your high, Jihoon gently pulls out of you before tying off the condom and throwing it in the trash. He flops down on the bed next to you and you cuddle right into his side, pressing a kiss right to his pec.
He reaches up to rub his hand up and down your back as you two lay there in silence, pressing kisses to each other’s bare skin.
Jihoon isn’t sure how long you two stay like that, until your kisses get a bit more meaningful and suddenly Jihoon is pinning you against the bed. His cock is already half hard again and it doesn’t take much to get it to full mast.
Your second round is softer, but just as intense. There’s a more romantic passion behind Jihoon’s motions as he takes his time getting you both off. Sensual kisses are traded as you and Jihoon whisper praises back and forth.
Halfway through fucking you Jihoon has the fleeting thought that he doesn’t want this to end. You both end up cumming together, your names falling off of each other’s lips with your foreheads pressed together. It’s oddly adorable and it takes Jihoon longer to pull out of you, completely content to keep his cock in you as you two lay cuddled in your bed.
When Jihoon finally does get up to discard the used condom and get something to clean you up, the sun is starting to set and Jihoon curses. When he checks his phone, his predictions are proved right at the sight of the numerous texts from their manager and Seungcheol.
You seem to realize this as well when Jihoon walks back to the bed and starts to get dressed.
“Do you really have to leave?” You look up at Jihoon. You look so cozy, cuddled up in bed, still naked. It really makes Jihoon want to stay and jump back in bed and tangle himself up with you again.
“Yeah, they need me back at the hotel,” he says instead, a bit discouraged as well.
“You’re in town for a few more days right?”
“Yeah, until Sunday.”
You reach out and grab Jihoon’s hand, pulling him to sit on the bed. You sit up as well, curling your bare body around his clothed form. You press a kiss to his ear.
“If you find the time, you should come to my concert on Friday.” Sleep laces your voice as you talk to Jihoon. Your body is warm pressed against him and Jihoon has never been more tempted to ignore his manager in his life. “We’re having a pop up concert to celebrate our fifth anniversary. I can get you seats in our VIP sections so no one would see you. I’ll text you the details but don’t feel pressured to come. Just, if you and your band want to do something fun, I can get the tickets.”
Jihoon nods. “Yeah, okay. I’ll be there.”
“Good.” Jihoon turns to face you and you press a quick kiss to his lips. “I’ll see you then. I’d walk you out but…” You gesture to your undressed form and Jihoon laughs.
“See you Friday. Sleep well Y/N.” Jihoon presses one final kiss to your lips before leaving your apartment, already missing you by the time he walks out the door.
The rest of the week Jihoon can’t do anything but wait for Friday, excited for your concert. He can’t wait to hear your band play live again, but mostly he can’t wait to see you again. You’ve been plaguing his mind since he last saw you, and it’s not just the sex. Jihoon can’t deny the pure, unbridled chemistry between you two and it makes his heart thump in his chest.
When Jihoon brings up the idea to his members about going to see your concert they all say it could be fun and Jihoon sends you a text affirming their attendance. Jihoon thinks it’s a little silly, his group of K-Pop idols going to go see your very explicit rock band perform.
When Friday comes Jihoon takes his time dressing up and he tries not to hit Soonyoung when he points it out. 
The concert starts at around 8:00pm and doors open an hour earlier than that, but you told Jihoon to arrive a bit earlier so it would be less obvious to spot them going in. When the boys get there a quarter after 6:00, they are ushered in through the back doors.
Backstage hands are bustling around and there are a few people shouting at each other. The venue space is nice, but not too big. From what Jihoon saw online, it’s a pretty exclusive concert to see live, but tickets were sold for online streaming as well.
The boys are shown to their seats in a balcony room with glass covering one of the walls so they can see the stage. It seems to have some kind of film on the other side so they can see out, but nobody can see in.
“Wah, this is nice,” Seokmin says as he looks around the room.
“And for free too, Jihoonie hooked us up well,” Seungcheol adds. “This Y/N girl must like you a lot.”
Jihoon can feel his ears heating up. “Yah, all of you shut up.”
He turns away from his members, too embarrassed to continue the conversation. Jihoon does have to admit, you really are doing a lot giving free tickets to the thirteen men on such a short notice, and to get them into such a nice room.
When the doors open, Jihoon watches as your fans flood into the room. He can hear the chatter of everyone and he smiles at how excited all of your fans are to see you. The whole place packs up soon as everyone waits impatiently for the show to start.
Then the time hits and everyone is screaming as your band walks onto the stage. Jihoon’s eyes automatically fall to your figure and his heart beats against his ribcage. You’ve got a wide smile on your face as you strap your bass onto your body and walk up to your mic.
“Let’s make some noise!” Luka shouts into the mic and everyone erupts into applause. “Welcome to our 5th anniversary pop up concert, we are LADYKILLER, and tonight, we’re gonna have a good time. We’ll be keeping this casual tonight so get comfortable, get hype, and enjoy this first song.” 
Jihoon’s eyes trail up and down your figure as your fingers fly over the strings of your bass. You’re dressed in a black leather boots, a short black denim skirt, and a silky white tank top lined with black lace. Your top looks closer to lingerie than an actual shirt and Jihoon can tell once again you’re not wearing a bra underneath.
You didn’t bother covering the hickies Jihoon left all over your chest and Jihoon feels his face heat up. The dark purple marks are scattered all over your bare skin and even though he’s a bit mortified, he’s also a bit proud.
Jihoon’s not the only one who notices the hickeys and he can feel his members send him suggestive looks as they watch the performance. Jihoon does his best to ignore them and focus on the band playing.
Jihoon admires how good you look up on stage. You really know how to work the crowd and you’re nothing short of mesmerizing to Jihoon. Every video he’s seen of you on stage doesn’t nearly do the real thing justice. After the first four songs your band stops the setlist to do some fan interaction.
“Y/N!” Someone calls from the audience. “Who gave you those hickeys!” 
Jihoon wants to die as his members start to howl in their booth and Jihoon hopes that it’s sound proof. You just laugh along.
“Ah, these? They’re pretty aren’t they?” You run your fingers over your clavicle. “Now for who gave them to me…it’s not very nice of me to kiss and tell is it? But who knows? Maybe the perpetrator is sitting in this very room right now.” You wink at the audience and everyone goes crazy, screaming at your words.
The concert is fun, with lots of crowd interactions as you guys answer questions and give your own anecdotes from the past five years. You guys even tease your next album, sending the crowd into a frenzy when they see the teaser for one of the music videos.
It isn’t until closer to the end of the concert that Jihoon starts to have a real problem. In one of your most popular songs there’s a wicked bass solo that consists of you playing for two minutes straight and it’s one of the reasons why you are one of the more popular members of your group (on top of well…you know). Normally Jihoon would be entranced by the skillful way you play your instrument, putting your whole heart and soul into your solo, but today he can’t focus on anything other than the way you look.
You look sultry as you smirk out at the audience. At one point your eyes flit up to where Jihoon is sitting and you wink and Jihoon thinks he might pass out from how sexy you look right now. You put your whole body into playing and when you bend over, Jihoon can see your bare tits hanging freely in the air and he has to shift around to adjust his growing hard on. He doesn’t know if he should worship or despise whoever your stylist is.
Behind him, he can hear Jeonghan and Joshua snickering. Jihoon does his best to think about anything that will get his semi-hard cock to go down, but unfortunately for him the last song in your set list is hands down the most sexually charged. 
As soon as the opening notes are heard, the whole atmosphere of the room changes. The lights dim as red accent lights bask the stage. Jihoon can’t peel his eyes away from you as you move with the music, your hips swaying along in a hypnotizing way.
He gasps a bit when Luka comes up behind you and grabs your hips, practically grinding on you as he sways with you. His hands travel up your sides and he brushes his fingertips over the upper part of your chest. When his hands move back down, this time they’re pressed to your front, dragging over your tits and down your stomach before he finally pulls away.
The whole time the crowd is hooked, and so is Jihoon. He’s a bit jealous that someone else is touching you in such an intimate way, but he knows it’s nothing but fan service, so he instead focused on how incredibly erotic he finds the moment, imagining he’s the one touching you instead.
After the song is finished your band thanks the audience before exiting the stage. The whole room is still buzzing with energy as they start to exit and Jihoon’s members seem to be hyped up as well.
“I see why you like them Jihoon,” Mingyu says and Jeonghan snorts.
“I can too.”
Jihoon groans but thankfully he’s saved when someone comes to retrieve them and guide them to the backstage area where your band is standing. You’re leaning against an audio case, drinking a bottle of water. Your body is shining with the post concert glow Jihoon is so familiar with. Jihoon is lost staring at you when a voice grabs his attention.
“Hey Y/N, isn’t that your boyfriend?” It’s Tommy who says this as he glances over to where Jihoon and the rest of Seventeen stands. Jihoon tries not to get flustered over his choice of words.
When you look over to where Tommy is motioning, your face instantly lights up at the sight of Jihoon. You stand up and cross the stage quickly before drawing Jihoon into a hug. “Jihoon!”
Jihoon snakes his arms around you and hugs you back. Your body is still warm from performing on stage and you feel nice pressed up against him. “Hi Y/N.”
“I missed you,” you whisper in his ear, just soft enough that only he can hear. His heart flutters at the words.
“Yo!” At the loud shouting you and Jihoon pull apart, just in time to see Vernon and James engage in a bro hug. You giggle at the two boys and Jihoon realizes that your hand has moved to hold onto his tightly.
The rest of your band is walking over and Tommy and Luka greet Vernon and Joshua. While everyone makes conversation you squeeze Jihoon’s hand and pull him away. He follows after, figuring his boys will be occupied with your boys for a while.
You pull Jihoon away from the backstage area and into your dressing room. It’s nice and large with a plush looking couch pushed against one wall. As soon as you close the door of your room you’re pushing Jihoon onto the couch and climbing on top of him, placing a leg on either side of his thick thighs. Automatically Jihoon’s hands fly up to hold your waist.
Your own hands cup Jihoon’s face as you kiss him softly. He kisses you back, soft and sweet. When you pull away from him, you wrap your arms around his neck, cuddling into his body.
“I’m so happy to see you.”
Jihoon is almost relieved to hear those words. The whole week he questioned if he was weird to miss you so much after only meeting twice. He likes knowing you feel the same.
“I’m happy to see you too. You looked great up there.” As he talks to you his hands rub up and down your sides, enjoying the silky feeling of your shirt under his palms.
“Yeah?”
“Yeah. Really great.” Jihoon shifts under you a bit, hoping you get the message. You obviously do when you giggle and lean down, pressing your mouth to his ear.
“You know Ji, I’m always so horny after performing. Help a girl out?”
Jihoon nods frantically and then before he can even blink your mouth is pressed up against his in a hot, wet kiss. Your fingers grasp the back of his neck, pulling him towards you and he wraps his arms around your waist, hugging you close to him. Jihoon can’t help but love the feeling of being able to have you like this again. You two fit together nicely and Jihoon wants to keep you in his lap forever.
Your thighs are tightly locked around his waist as you grind down on his crotch. Jihoon’s arms tighten around you even more as he bucks up into you. He’s been trying to keep his boner at bay but now that he has you all alone, he can stop caring. He rubs himself up against your warm core, already wet through your panties.
Something about the way you so easily fall apart in Jihoon’s arms drives him particularly mad. The soft whimpers that leave the back of your throat as you grasp at him more and more desperately. When Jihoon pulls away to catch his breath your lips are trailing after his, not quite wanting to let him go soon. Maybe Jihoon likes it because he’s just as obsessed with you as you are with him. He leans down to press open mouthed kisses to your throat and you giggle as he does.
“Didn’t even bother hiding them,” Jihoon mutters, his fingers trailing across the old bruises splayed across your chest.
“I wanted to show them off! You did such a pretty job.” You shake your chest a bit to show them off more, but Jihoon can only focus on the jiggle of your tits in his face. Jihoon dives down, his tongue laving right over them.
He can taste the salt of your sweat on your skin and it’s oddly intoxicating mixed with the scent of your expensive perfume and your weight pressing down on him. His cock is aching in his pants now, begging to find release.
You seem to realize this as you pull away from Jihoon and slip off his lap and onto the floor. The sight of you on your knees in front of Jihoon is nearly enough to make him cum on the spot. You look up at him with big pleading eyes and Jihoon forces himself to burn the image into his memory.
“Ji,” you whine, “lemme suck you. Please. You look so good tonight, I need your cock between my lips.”
Jihoon’s in a pair of blue jeans, a white t-shirt, and a leather jacket. It’s not much but he’s aware he looks good in the get up. He’s glad you’ve noticed as well. Jihoon internally gloats that while Soonyoung might of made fun of him, he’s the one getting his dick wet right now.
Jihoon shifts his hips a bit to signal you to go ahead and you dive right in, unzipping his pants and taking his cock out. It springs out of its constraints, heavy and hard as you hold it in your grasp. Without breaking eye contact with Jihoon you lean down and wrap your lips around the tip, sucking gently.
Jihoon takes an unsteady breath, not sure how long he’ll be able to hold out. He’s never wanted to cum as badly as he does now, watching the sight of your warm, soft lips on his thick, red cock head. Jihoon feels your tongue press up against his sensitive tip, lapping at where his precum has started to pearl, and he shudders.
He has to stop himself from grabbing your head and shoving it down his length. Instead he digs his fingers into the couch cushions next to him and goes his best not to thrust up into your mouth. You must sense Jihoon’s eagerness though, as you stop your coy act and widen your jaw, taking more of him in you. You bob your head up and down, your lips and tongue dragging against his cock, shooting pleasure through Jihoon’s body.
The sounds your mouth makes are the lewdest noises Jihoon has ever heard and he gets a picture to match it as he stares down at you. Your hands are wrapped around his length where your mouth can’t reach and your eyes are closed, focused on getting Jihoon off.
Your mouth and hands are skilled as you quickly work Jihoon to his high. You suck particularly hard at his tip and without much warning he’s bucking up into your throat, spilling his seed into you. Jihoon almost cums a second time just from watching you swallow down the load he gave you.
When you’re done swallowing, you open your mouth for Jihoon to see you took all of it and Jihoon can’t help himself from grabbing your jaw and running his thumb across your bottom lip before pushing it into your mouth. You automatically wrap your lips around it, sucking on it just like you did with his cock a few seconds ago. When you finally pop the digit out of your mouth, Jihoon’s cock is already starting to stir again.
Jihoon is aware you’ve probably done a lot of hooks up before. You’re a rockstar who writes songs about sex, of course you have to get your inspiration from somewhere. Still, the thought makes Jihoon a bit jealous and he has to push it down in turn to watch you start to strip for him.
You start with your top, easily tugging it over your head and tossing it to the side. Your tits are just as perfect as Jihoon remembers them. Jihoon stands up from the couch, his dick still hanging out of his jeans, as he crosses to where you’re standing. Without saying a word he reaches out and gropes your tits in his palms. As his fingers knead at your breasts, he leans in, connecting your lips together.
You let out a hiss that turns into a moan as Jihoon pinches your left nipple hard. Your hands scramble to push Jihoon’s jacket off his shoulders, the article of clothing falling to the ground with your discarded shirt.
His shirt is the next to go and Jihoon lets out a dissatisfied grunt when he has to pull his mouth away from yours. He’s not too upset by it though, because now he gets to feel your tits press up against his own chest. Both of your bodies are on fire and the actual heat of your dressing room isn’t helping either, suffocating his thoughts so the only thing on his mind is you and your pretty little cunt.
Speaking of your pretty little cunt, Jihoon’s fingers work frantically at the buttons of your skirt so he can have better access to it. He pushes your skirt down your hips and grabs one of your thighs, wrapping it around his waist so he can grind his dripping cock against your drenched panties. He groans against your shoulder when he feels the rough fabric of the lace against his tip.
Jihoon steps back from you to take off the rest of his clothes and he gets a good look at you then. Your lips are dark and swollen from how aggressively you two have been kissing and your chest is already starting to sprout new bruises from Jihoon’s relentless attacks on the soft skin. You’ve also shed your last layer and Jihoon gets a good look at your needy pussy.
Jihoon lets out a long exhale, his body screaming at him to fuck you.
He’s about to when he comes to a realization, causing him to curse softly. He doesn’t have a condom. He tells you that.
“Doesn't matter,” you tell him. “I’m on the pill and I’m 100% clean. Condoms were just a secondary precaution, but I need you in me now. Please Jihoon, just fuck me.” 
The thought sends Jihoon off. You just gave him permission to fuck you raw. The thought of your warm, wet walls wrapped around Jihoon’s cock without any barriers has Jihoon grabbing you and bending you over right there. You yelp a bit at being thrown around, but it quickly turns into a moan when you feel Jihoon grind up against your exposed folds.
“Ah~ Jihoon, please,” you beg. You sound so needy that Jihoon has no choice but to shove his cock into you. Your walls wrap around him desperately as he pushes into you. The fit is tight and Jihoon has to take a shaky breath before he starts to ram into you.
He can tell his cock is still just a bit too girthy for you from the way you whine every time he re-enters you. He slides his hand up your spine to between your shoulder blades and he presses down, pushing you into the couch cushions. 
Jihoon feels like he’s in a porno with the way he’s fucking you. When he glances to where your bodies are connected, a creamy ring has started to form around his base from your pussy. The recoil of your ass as he thrusts into you is hypnotizing and he has to pull his eyes away not to get too distracted. He slides his hand up further and into your hair, pulling back to lift your head off the couch.
Jihoon can’t believe he gets to be here with you like this again, his cock digging deep into your sweet cunt. His fingers tug at your hair a bit harder and your walls clench down around him, sending Jihoon’s brain and dick into a frenzy. 
“You like that jagiya?”
“Yes, yes, fuck Jihoon. I love it. Love your big fat cock and your strong hands and your sexy voice,” you ramble on, your voice tense and labored, taking breaks between your words just to catch your breath. 
Jihoon’s free hand lifts up off your hip, only to go flying back down against your ass, resounding in a loud slap echoing through the room mixed with your moan. Your ass is red when he pulls his hand back and Jihoon does it twice more before smiling, satisfied with the way it seemed to turn your brain off even more.
You look so pretty under him, sharing your pleasure with Jihoon as he uses your body to get himself off. When Jihoon glances at your face, your eyes are closed shut, tears spilling down your cheeks as a line of drool connects from your mouth to the couch. Jihoon’s stomach tightens as he watches you and he knows he’s close.
“Shit, Y/N,” Jihoon growls out as a warning before he’s pressing his hips flush against your, releasing his load straight into your pussy. At the feeling of his cum shooting into you, you cry out, your walls clenching down on him, pulsating.
Jihoon is panting as he pulls out of you, him cum spilling out along with it. His cum slides to the floor in thick globs and you groan at the feeling of it exiting your pussy. With shaky legs you stand up, clinging to Jihoon for support as you pull him into a kiss. Your mouths and teeth clash together, but it doesn’t matter because your lips are tangling together and Jihoon can taste you against his tongue and for now that subdues the urge to devour you.
Despite both of you just cumming, neither of you give yourselves time to rest. You push Jihoon back onto the couch before climbing into his lap again. Only this time, you line yourself back up with his cock before sinking down on him. His cock is still hard and he’s still terribly turned on so he’s not complaining. He’s grateful for his idol stamina or else he’s not sure he would be able to keep up with your insatiable desires.
“Shit, you’re still so tight,” Jihoon grunts. “Your cunt is perfect for my cock. So good for me.”
His grip on your hips is tight, probably too tight, but he can’t be bothered to care when your head is thrown back and the nastiest sounds are leaving your lips. Your tits bounce freely in his face as you fuck yourself on his lap and Jihoon can’t do anything other than stare in awe at them, enjoying the show.
“God Jihoon, you feel so good in me,” you cry out. Your fingers are perched on his shoulders, your fingers digging into the muscle so you can anchor yourself better.
As you bounce up and down on Jihoon’s cock, more of his cum pushes out of your cunt and drips onto Jihoon’s lap along with all of the slick your pussy is producing. Jihoon wants to cum in you again, already obsessed with filling up your tight cunt with his seed. 
His hands travel up your body and he gropes your tits harshly, pinch the nipples and scraping his teeth over your sensitive buds. You look like you’re about to ascend to heaven as you roll your eyes back into your head, moaning like your life depends on it.
It’s enough to get Jihoon desperate to go over the edge and he wraps his arms around your hips before pulling your body against his. You press your weight against his body, your legs giving out on you, as Jihoon starts to buck up into your sweet cunt. He’s sure the pressure is brutal inside of you, leaving you with a bruised cervix for later, but Jihoon only has one focus right now so he can’t bother being nice. He buries his face in your neck, doing everything to reach his high.
You seem to reach yours first, your body trembling in his grip as you trap his cock in a vice grip. This is enough to finally get Jihoon to cum for a third time tonight, spilling it all into your pussy again.
Jihoon’s body is sweaty and hot and he’s exhausted as he slumps back against the couch, out of breath with no thoughts in his mind. You don’t look much better as you drop your body on top of his, your eyes closing as you nuzzle your head against his chest.
Neither of you say anything for a while, just doing your best to regain your bearings and enjoy the feeling of your bodies sandwiched together. At some point Jihoon’s now flaccid cock slips out of you, but you don’t get off his lap yet. 
When you two do finally pull apart Jihoon is still feeling a bit light headed but he’s at least back down on Earth as he kisses your tear stained cheeks, rubbing your back.
“How are you feeling?”
“Good, very good,” you tell him. “Just…very tired now.”
Jihoon chuckles and stands up to grab a water bottle from the mini fridge sitting to the side of the room. You take it and chug the whole thing down. While you do that Jihoon looks around the room for something to clean you both up with. There’s a box of tissues sitting on your vanity and he grabs that and starts to wipe himself down before doing the same to you. It’s not the best clean up he’s ever done, but it’s the best he can do for now.
Jihoon finds his clothes and puts his boxers back on before crawling back onto the couch next to you. You lean against him, resting your head on his shoulder.
“You’re cute, you know that?” You mumble into Jihoon’s collarbone. “Right before you were gonna cum, you started mumbling in Korean.”
Jihoon flushes. He didn’t even know he was talking, let alone in Korean.
He settles on saying, “Your moans are cuter though.”
You stay silent for a moment before speaking up again, your voice more somber this time. “You’re leaving soon right?”
“Yeah, Sunday morning, so in two days.”
You snuggle a bit closer into Jihoon. “Would it be ridiculous to say I think I’ve gotten attached to you.”
Jihoon huffs out a laugh. “Not ridiculous, I think I feel the same.”
The truth is, Jihoon has gotten attached to you, even after only two days of interaction. There’s something so alluring about you that draws Jihoon in. Just like a siren calling a fisherman, you’ve drawn him in and it’s only due time before he crashes.
Your presence is comfortable and everything feels natural with you, it feels right. Jihoon doesn’t want it to end. He wants to store you away in his suitcase and bring you back to Korea with him. Everyday he’d get to wake up next to you, your pretty smile being the first thing he sees when he opens his eyes. You two would spend your days making music and cuddling on the couch. Then at the end of the day Jihoon would be able to press you into the mattress and have his way with you, enjoying the taste of you lingering in his mouth and soaking up every pretty sound he pulls from your lips.
But, he can’t. He has to leave you here, thousands of miles away from him, with a thirteen hour time difference from New York to Seoul. Not to mention you have your own careers and Jihoon is well aware of the time and effort his own takes. The Carats absolutely wouldn’t have it if it was revealed he has a girlfriend, who he was living with. Especially one with your public image. They would rip you to shred.
But god does Jihoon wish it would work out.
“Hey,” you say softly. Your finger is tracing patterns against his chest. “Would you maybe…want to spend the night at my place?”
Jihoon looks down at you and nods. He doesn’t care if his managers are going to kill him, he’s going to spend as much time with you as he can before he leaves. He shoots a quick message to his members who promise they’ll cover for him and then before he knows it he’s being driven to your apartment.
When you two get into your unit you order food for the two of you and then you fall asleep in Jihoon’s arms when you’re done eating. It’s painfully domestic and Jihoon holds you the whole night, afraid to let you go.
In the morning, when you wake up, Jihoon bombards you with a barrage of kisses and you giggle as you pull Jihoon’s body even closer to yours. It doesn’t take long to get both of you riled up, leading to your clothes strewn on the floor as Jihoon sinks himself into you once more.
That’s how you two spend the rest of your day, limbs tangled together, making love as Jihoon does his best to burn the feeling of your bare body pressing against him into his memory.
His head is currently shoved between your thighs, suffocating in your drenched pussy. You’ve had his thigh, fingers, and cock once but Jihoon is determined to get you off at least five times today. For now he’s taking his time though. His mouth moves slowly, teasing you so you get unbearably needy for Jihoon to give you more.
His tongue drags through your folds, collecting your slick and swallowing it down. Between the taste of your arousal, the sweet smell of your cunt, and the feel of your pussy on his tongue, Jihoon’s mind is muddled with a lust induced haze and Jihoon wonders if this is what it feels like to get high.
Jihoon’s plump lips wrap around your clit and he sucks on it gently, just enough to stimulate you but not enough to actually do anything. You squirm and whine and tug at Jihoon’s hair, but he ignores your attempts to get him to do more, content with driving you crazy for now.
Your legs squeeze tight around Jihoon’s neck, pulling him even further into your cunt. Your thighs are like earmuffs over his ears, cutting off his last sense so there’s nothing but you. Jihoon ruts his hips into the mattress under him, his own cock leaking and hard. He has a bit more resolve than you though, and he clamps his thick hands on your thighs, prying them apart once more.
“Please Jihoon,” you beg. “I need more.”
Jihoon pretends he can’t hear you as drags his lips to kiss over your folds like he’s making out with your pussy. He does this a few more times before moving his mouth off your core completely, turning his head so he can suck marks into your thighs. 
“Jihoon,” your voice sounds genuinely desperate, like if Jihoon doesn’t do anything you’ll actually combust. This is what Jihoon has been waiting for and he tightens his grip on you before diving straight into your cunt.
His motions have purpose behind them now as he licks at your sopping cunt. His nose bumps against your clit as his tongue flick back and forth over your hole. Your body is now trembling under him as you cry out in pleasure.
“Fuck, fuck, Jihoon, shit.” The words tumble out of your mouth as your legs shake around his head. He keeps eating your pussy out until your body goes limp.
He’s a bit surprised you came so fast, but he guesses you were pretty worked up from all of the teasing. And the previous orgasms.
Jihoon’s only cum once though, compared to the four times you have, and he’s not going to let you rest until he gets his second in. He picks himself up from between your legs and climbs over your body. He kisses up your torso, stopping at your tits for a moment, before finally making his way to your lips.
He kisses you hard and fierce, too impatient to be soft at the moment. You moan at the taste of yourself on his tongue. Your hips buck up into him when you feel his cock drag over your slit, his precum spreading against your folds. Jihoon is sure he could get off just like this, rubbing your pussy on his cock, and if he was just a tad bit more desperate he would, but he’s still slightly level headed enough to make the decision he wants to cum inside of you.
Jihoon spreads your legs wide before sheathing himself right into you. Your cunt allows him in easily, slick and stretched out from all of Jihoon’s previous efforts. His pubes brush up against your clit as he bottoms out in one go.
You let out a weak moan as Jihoon lets out his own deep sigh. Your walls are warm and soft around his aching dick and Jihoon imagines this is exactly what heaven feels like. As much as Jihoon would like to take his time with you, he’s already done that earlier and while teasing you, he got himself a bit too worked up as well. 
Jihoon doesn’t waste time, plunging his cock in and out of your cunt. His cock hits deeper and harder into you each time, slamming into your plush walls. The noises you make make Jihoon want to fuck you even harder and he grabs your legs and pushes them up against your chest, exposing your cunt to him even more. The change in angle has his tip digging into a new place, making you moan even louder.
“Ji, Ji, Ji,” you chant as the man in question continues to slam his hips into yours. Jihoon groans as he looks down at you, his hands pushing down against your legs to keep them in place, folding you in half. 
“So pretty,” Jihoon grunts. “My pretty baby feels good from my cock?”
“Yes, yes, so much. Feels soooo good Jihoon.” You’re babbling at this point, barely coherent from the pleasure you feel. The thought makes Jihoon smirk, gaining the urge to drive you completely for the edge. 
One of his hands releases your legs and moves up to your neck, clamping around it. His fingers squeeze firmly and you gasp a bit. He feels your cunt tighten around him, causing him to squeeze even harder. Your eyes roll into the back of your head as you throw your head back against your pillow.
Your skin is burning under Jihoon’s palm and he can feel the way your neck muscles move under his fingertips from the way you’re doing your best to let out strangled moans. Your body is already spent from the past four orgasms he’s given you, but he’s still not going to go easy on you. 
He wants you crying from his cock. Coming undone again and again and again until you can’t remember anything other than Jihoon. Nobody will ever be able to be as good as him and every time you go to write a new song, you think of him and this moment.
Your pussy keeps clenching down around him and Jihoon closes his eyes, trying to drag this out even more. He knows he won’t last much longer though. The warmth of the room combined with the warmth of your body has his own skin heating up, fogging up his brain. 
Jihoon feels your hand wrap around his wrist, pulling his fingers off your neck and moving them so they slip into your mouth. You suck on the digits, swirling your tongue around them, your taste buds pressing against his pads and that’s all it takes to send Jihoon over the edge. He cums deep into you, his cum shooting against your cervix.
Jihoon’s hips don’t stop though, pounding brutally into you, milking himself with your cunt. He pulls his fingers out of your mouth and slips them between your bodies, flicking and rubbing at your clit furiously. It isn’t until he feels you tense up under him, that he finally pulls his dick out of you. As soon as he does, the flood gates are broken and your cunt is spraying your juices all over the bed and Jihoon. 
The idol watches the way your pussy pulsates when you’re done squirting. You look completely wrecked and ready to pass out and Jihoon sees that as a job well done. Your leg keeps twitching every so often and Jihoon reaches over and massages it.
You whine a bit at his touch but don’t pull away. “‘M so sensitive.”
“You did so good for me,” Jihoon coos. 
When Jihoon is sure that you’re not going to pass out he gets up and pads into the kitchen to get you a glass of water. When he gets back to the room he finds that you’ve rolled out of the wet spot you made and are now sitting up.
You take the water from him and chug it down before making a feeble attempt to stand up. Your legs shake a bit and Jihoon has to steady you. He helps you to the bathroom where he draws you a bath and moves back to your room to change out the sheets.
When you get out of your bath you crawl back into the freshly changed bed where Jihoon is laying waiting. You don’t hesitate to snuggle down into his arms.
“I don’t want you to leave,” you admit in a small voice.
Jihoon sighs. He doesn’t want to leave either.
“I know that it’s unreasonable to do long distance,” you continue, “and that we both have busy schedules but, I’d really like it if we kept in touch. Then maybe the next time you’re in America, or if I go to Korea, we could meet up again.”
Jihoon kisses the top of your head. “I’d really like that too.”
In reality, Jihoon isn’t sure what’s going to happen. He’d like to think that you guys will keep in touch because he really hopes you do and for once he’s letting himself be an optimist. It’s not exactly like he’ll be able to forget about you anyway, so it’s better to keep a place open for you in his heart.
Jihoon holds you tight until he no longer can and he leaves you once more with nothing but a kiss and a promise to text you. His heart aches in a way he didn’t know was possible as he boards the plane to fly back home to Korea. Just another reason for Jihoon to hate flying.
This time Vernon sits next to him and the younger holds an earbud out to him. Jihoon slips it into his ear and the sound of a familiar bass solo floods his mind. Jihoon sends a grateful look at his dongsaeng, letting your playing soothe his heart. 
By the time the song ends Jihoon’s head is filled with ideas for songs about you and his heart is warm with a feeling that everything is going to work out in the end.
.
.
.
"Did you hear who's going to be featured on LADYKILLER's new track?"
"No, who?"
"Woozi and Vernon from Seventeen."
"Damn, I already know it's gonna be good. I mean, Y/N and Woozi? Sounds like a match made in heaven."
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taglist: @pandorashbox @leejihoonownsmyheart @soonhoonietrash @chaimi-yuta @embrace-themagic @kayleeshinee @joonsytip @heyxxitsxxtay @synthetickitsune @chwecardcaptor @candidupped @dreamhannies @d0nghyck @niyizh @baldi-2 @spilled-coffee-cup @sulkygyu @enhacolor @noniestars @heavenly-mobo @sunnyteume @debsworld23 @m1nghaos @just-here-to-read-01 @blxckswxnxge @17kwans @jeanjacketjesus @x-veex @namjoonbaby @ovai @belladaises @todorokiskitten @valentxi @yeosayang @98-0603 @miriamxsworld @morklee02 @luvv4svt @tinkerbell460 @toruro @lllucere @novalpha @yongi-lee @seuomo @niktwazny303 @brxzilianbaby @moshiyuron @im-gemmy @honeylovemoon @opwolfe
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princessdimondheart · 1 year ago
Text
The Twins | Ghost x Wife! Reader
Pairing: Ghost x f! Reader + Their Twins
Warnings: 🔪- violence, terrorist act, blood, inaccurate medical scenes; 😭- fear, emotional stuff, family; 🥺- well deserved happiness
Edited: No
A/N: Simon’s mother doesn’t have a canon name so I decided it’s based off of a flower. You pick which one. Almost 8k words 😳. Part 2? Idk. Sorry it took so long! 😭😭
Masterlist
Character banner ©️ Me
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Tommy brushed his short hair back like it would do anything. It was a standard military cut, close shaven but not exactly bald. When he had it cut- to get used to it he told himself- his twin sister, Violet, laughed in his face. Said he looked like an escaped inmate with the cut or someone from pre-Y2K. He pouted remembering it, he had yelled something about her blue-dyed hair being basic and threw a dirty sock in her face. She yelled and then grabbed his arm and proceeded to throw him over her shoulder. He really should have seen it coming. Her hard work in Tai Kwon Do really paid off. His back and ass hurt for the next few days. 
Unfortunately, his poor mother paid witness to the little altercation. She was tired from a long shift at the hospital and was laying on their gray couch munching on Doritos. She only shook her head when he whined to her about Violet. She told him that if he wanted to join the army like he dreamed about, then he would have to toughen up and not complain about things whenever they went wrong. A distant look shown in her eyes. An old memory most likely; one of their long gone father, a military man, and one of the reasons why Tommy wanted to join. To follow in his father’s footsteps despite his job being the reason he wasn’t in their life anymore. He and his twin got quiet and then went their separate ways. They knew how much the loss of their father hurt their mother and they didn’t want to bring her any more pain by mentioning him when she’s emotionally drained from her shift. 
When Tommy had told her that he wanted to join the army, his mother froze in shock before tears spilled from her eyes. A hand covered her sobs and her brow furrowed. He had never seen his mother cry before and it nearly had him spiraling. He rushed to hug his mother asking her what was wrong. When she calmed down, she pulled back and held his cheek in her hand. 
“You’re just like your father. I knew something like this was going to happen but I wasn’t sure it would be so soon.” She wiped her tears with her other hand. “It’s okay, you can go if you really want to.”
He didn’t realize the tears building up in his eyes until they were running down his face. He was only 15 but he was already a head taller than his mother. She said he got his height from his father. Tommy had to tell her his decision because her permission was what would get him into the army when he turned 16. He had no other dreams, just the army and making his parents proud. 
“Tommy! Are you done checking yourself out? We need to go to this last store before heading home.” Violet’s voice crashed his preening in front of a mirror in an H&M store. “The sun’s already set and we’re running late as it is.”
“Chill, Vi, we don’t always have to be punctual. Mom’s on shift anyways, we can go home at whatever time we want!” He looked at her through the mirror. 
She rolled her eyes at him, scoffing, “says the boy that wants to join the army where punctuality is very important.” 
Violet’s eye color was from her mother, in fact, all of her looks were from her, even her height except her eye shape was from their dad. Tommy was the one who was almost a carbon copy of their dad. There were slight variations in their looks, like skin tone and hair texture but nothing too different. He liked the fact that he looked like his dad. It made him feel closer to him in a way. 
“Yeah, yeah. Whatever, let’s go so you can shut your whining. I am in the army.” Tommy mumbled the last part under his breath. He shoved a hand in his pocket and pushed the other in front of her face, wiggling his fingers for the bags she was holding. She handed them over when he moved his hand closer to her face and she swatted it away. Sure, he messed around with his sister but he was still a gentleman. His mother would fry his ass if he was anything but. 
They were heading to Piccadilly Circus to look at the stores in search of a birthday present for their mom. It was coming up soon and they were running behind in the gift department. All other aspects of the little party they were planning were already put together, the only thing left was her gift. Now that he was in the army for just over a year, he had some money saved up and was planning on using it for her gift. That was the reason why he was here, he was on leave for her birthday next week. Violet suggested a nice pair of earrings and a necklace for her since she doesn’t really own jewelry other than her wedding bands. Tommy readily agreed. 
The walk from H&M to the square wasn’t longer than ten minutes but they took their time window shopping along the way. The square was decently crowded, it was a Thursday after all and there were plenty of tourists and locals scurrying in and out of the shops. Tommy rubbed his hands together, it was cold that night. Unusual for the time of year but he assumed global warming was to blame. He really wished spring would finish up so summer could get here. 
~~~~~
Ghost was methodically sharpening his knife on a whetstone when Price knocked on his door with a loud bang. His masked head whipped up and he gripped the knife tighter. 
“Load up, Simon. My office, yesterday!” His voice was hurried and gruff. Something was going down and that made Ghost kit up faster than normal. Grabbing his gun he was out of his room in less than a minute. 
In Prices office was the rest of 141, Gaz and Soap were kitted up in their tactical vests with their weapons slung over their shoulders. No one was sitting. 
“We just got word that a terrorist plot is going to go down tonight at Piccadilly Circus. We’re going to head over there before it goes down.” Price shook his head. “Hopefully our presence deters them or we’re able to put a stop to them before anyone gets hurt.”
Gaz was reasonably upset. He had been there for the first attack on the square a few years ago. It was actually how he got into Price’s sights in the first place and joined the Task Force. “Again? Seriously?”
The Captain gave him a knowing look. “If it’s going to be an issue, you can stay here Kyle. You don’t have to go.”
“No-no, sir. It won’t be an issue.” Gaz sighed. “I just hope it turns out better than last time.”
Soap patted him on the shoulder. Price nodded at him and then walked to his office door. 
“Let’s go!”
~~~~~
Violet had tugged on Tommy’s jacket and pointed out a jewelry store that seemed promising. Luckily it was still open so they both went inside. The clerk greeted them but wasn’t as attentive to them because of their youth. That is until they told her their budget. Typical. 
She was looking into the bright glass boxes filled with different types of jewelry in gold, silver, diamonds or other precious stones. Tommy wasn’t really paying attention to her. He fiddled with his dog tags and the busted up ones that belonged to his father. They rested over his jacket. He’d hum and glance at a necklace she was pointing to but he was rather distracted. There was a small commotion just across the street near the metro entrance. 
A black van pulled up and several men jumped out of it seemingly inconspicuous. He thought nothing of it until he saw a handgun sticking out of his waistband. Now, Tommy didn’t do that great in the section about their laws in school but he sure as hell knew that guns were illegal in their country. His brows furrowed, and Violet tugged at his sleeve once more to get his attention. 
“Tommy! What’s with you?” She voiced her annoyance. “What are you looking at?”
She peered around him but didn’t notice what he was staring at so intensely. Tommy noticed that one of the men planted something on a nearby car parked on the street. He felt something go through his body. It was a feeling of cold and dread. Dread of what was most likely going to happen. What it was he didn’t have a clue. He just felt the cold chill his blood and goosebumps ran down his arms. 
His eyes widened in shock and fear when one of the men pulled out an assault rifle from the truck. He only had a few seconds. 
“Get down!” Was all he could manage to get out. 
Tommy turned and grabbed his twin by her arms, pulling her into his body. The shots rang out directly towards them and in various directions. He vaguely remembered hearing a loud boom ring out. Screams spread around them. Tommy could only feel the burning sensations coming from his right arm, lower back and left leg. Violet’s screams were muffled by his jacket, the dog tags dug into her face. Her head had hit the ground hard despite Tommy covering it with his hand, and it throbbed in that dull way. Glass shattered around them and alarms were going off. They dropped heavily to the ground. Tommy’s body was covering Violet’s protecting her from the blaze of bullets still lodging themselves in the walls around them. 
Violet screamed again as one land near their heads. Tears ran down both their faces. He tightened his grip on her. 
“Violet- Violet, please.” He grunted. “It’s okay, we-we’re gonna be fine. Just lay down. S-stay quiet, yeah, you’re good, Vi.”
She was shaking. He was shaking. Although his body was prepared for going to war, his mind had yet to catch up. Although, Tommy wasn’t sure if it was nerves that was causing him to shake, the cold chill spilling through the shattered store front, or the blood seeping out from his wounds. 
Violet felt wet but she couldn’t figure out what it was. At first she thought she had wet herself in fear but the feeling was coming from her torso. She turned her head as best as she could and saw Tommy grimacing in pain. Her eyes looked further down and saw the blood pooling under her. She wasn’t in pain. 
“Tommy! Ta-Tommy, you’re bleedin’!” Her voice pitched high with alarm. She sobbed into his shoulder. Her hands tucked into her body pulled out and wrapped around his back. She held him tight. 
“I-I’m fine, Vi.” He stuttered out. He was feeling weak from the blood loss. 
“Don’t l-lie to me Tommy.” She hiccuped. “You’re s-shit at it.”
More explosions rang beyond the store. They shook the building they were in. Pieces of debris were falling from the ceiling, landing on and around them. Suddenly, various gunshots were fired in rapid succession and Violet worried that more terrorists had arrived. She hoped that the police or some anti-terrorist agency would arrive soon. Several minutes pass and the gunfire lessened until it finally stopped. 
“Tommy? We can get up now, l-let me put pressure on y-your wounds.” Tommy wasn’t saying anything and that worried Violet. Her breathing quickened in her panic. “Tommy!? Get up! Tommy!”
Her hand reached up to push him off of her. It was a struggle as he had gained a significant amount of weight in muscle over the last year. He weighed a ton and when she was finally able to push him off of her, Violet was huffing even with her martial arts skills. Other times she’s able to pull him over her shoulder with momentum but now he was dead weight. God she dreaded the thought. Her shaking hands scrambled to his neck. Two fingers felt for his pulse and found a faint one. It fluttered but it was still there. She sighed in relief. 
Violet tried to remember the first aid course that she took last summer that their mom’s hospital was offering to students interested in joining the medical field. She surveyed his unconscious body to find any wounds and when she found them all she got to work as best as she could. Violet took off her jacket and wrapped it around Tommy’s arm hoping to slow down the bleeding. Then she remembered that he had on a belt and so she took it off to tie around his leg. He unconsciously groaned when she tightened it. She couldn’t really put pressure on the wound on his back but she tried her best to keep a hand covering the wound. The bullet hadn’t gone all the way through and stayed lodged inside him. It wasn’t sanitary but it was the best she could do. 
Her body continued to shake and she looked around the destroyed jewelry store. There were other bodies lying around. Blood was smeared on the shattered glass display where the lady was standing minutes before. The lack of pained noises sent a pang through her chest. More tears rolled down her cheeks and onto Tommy’s shuddering chest below her. She wished she hadn’t insisted on stopping by the other store instead of going straight here. They would have been home earlier. She wished she were the one injured and not Tommy. She was the oldest by a few minutes and it was her job to protect her little twin brother. She wished her mom was there to help Tommy. She wished her dad was there to help them get through this. 
She cried and cried. Pain and sadness filling her up and boiling over in body racking sobs. Her hand gripped one of Tommy’s. 
The silence was almost unbearable, until it wasn’t. 
~~~~~
They were too late, again. The intel that they had been receiving lately was always a little too late than normal. Ghost knew that Price was gonna have a word with all the intelligence personnel when they were done with the mess that was before them. Gaz was pissed as his expression showed. They’d all seen similar scenes like this before but it always hurt more when it happens on home soil. 
The police had arrived but were not as prepared as the Task Force, so they set up a perimeter not letting anyone in or out. They had dispatched all of the terrorists within a few minutes of them being in Piccadilly Circus. A few had lingered in the square while others had gone into some of the shops. Once the area was cleared and the police had began searching for survivors, Price had them doing the same. 
“Soap, Gaz, go together and look for anyone still breathing on the north side. Ghost and I’ll stay on the south side of the square.” They split up and began their search. 
Ghost passed a few bodies that weren’t alive. He saw the Captain flinch at the body of a child but he never said anything. Children were always hard in their line of work but for him it hit closer to home than what Ghost could ever understand. 
“Hello? Is anyone alive?! We’re the army!” Price began to call out in hopes of an answer back. 
There was silence yet it was loud. Sirens, alarms, and broken glass crunched underfoot and around them. They saw that the police and EMTs had found a majority of the survivors near them so they pushed further into the square. Price called out again and a muffled cry called back. 
“Help! Help me please!” The feminine voice cried to them. Her voice pulled them towards her like a lifeline. 
They ran to where the voice came from, a rather famous jewelry store that didn’t look as nice as before. The broken glass and bullet holes would turn anyone away. Ghost made it to the entryway first but Price stopped him with his hand. He gave him a look and went in first. Then Ghost remembered his skull mask and the fear it brought to people, especially civilians, so he waited until he was needed. The familiar crackle of the radio was heard faintly. 
“Shite, get in here Ghost! They’re kids!” Great, another demographic that he wasn’t really good with. When he stood by them he realized that these kids were older than what he thought. They were teenagers. 
Then, he froze. 
Years of memories rushed through his mind in seconds. The sound of laughter… a certain hair color… the smell of her favorite perfume… her flowers, whose scent would waft up his nose whenever he came home. Things he so painfully remembered and yet chose to let go so as to not cause tremendous harm. A feeling that he had longed to never let go. He grasped at the tendrils for a short while before that dreadful night. 
Those eyes… they were her eyes. At first he thought that she was kneeling there before him, but then remembered that more than a decade had passed and she would have changed in that time. Rarely had he seen her with tears streaked down her face. Or blood on her clothes…
Her look-alike cried out a sob and reality overtook his memories. 
“Please, please help my brother he got shot.” The girl pleaded looking up as he walked closer. She wasn’t scared of him in the mask but she was for her brother. That’s when Ghost looked down. 
Was he staring in a mirror? This boy. This kid. It was like looking at a photo of his younger self. 
Clink.
Ghost’s eyes snapped to the sound of metal in Prices hand. He’d already done a glance over of the boy and decided that the girl did a good job of wrapping his wounds with what she had. 
“Are these his?” Price asked the distraught girl. 
“Y-yeah. Tommy just joined the army not long ago. Barely over a year in.” She breathed in deeply as if to calm her mind. 
Tommy… he knew a Tommy once. His own brother. Every piece was coming together. He was one, and they were the other two. Just one was left…
“…and the other?” Price continued. He didn’t need to ask but he wanted to confirm the information he held. The cheeky bastard. 
“It’s our fathers… or what’s left of him.” Those same eyes as her looked down. Sadness filled them. Sadness for himself, he realized. A father long gone. Those were the tags that he left behind in the wreckage. Now here they were… somehow returned to him. 
Ghost hardly remembered when the ambulance pulled up in front of the store. Or when the EMTs moved Tommy onto the stretcher. But he did remember the smell of his blood and the salt in the air from her tears. 
Price was able to convince the EMTs to let them go with Tommy and his sister. They weren’t happy about it but decided that armed men tagging along with them after a terrorist attack wouldn’t be so bad. He’d also radioed Soap and Gaz of their departure. They had found some victims buried under rubble and were trying to get them out with some firefighters. 
Price whispered low enough for only Ghost to hear. “You doin’ okay, Simon?”
He didn’t know what to say. What could he say? His new-found daughter was siting across from him while his son lay injured, bleeding out from wounds caused by a terror act not thwarted by his team. He felt useless. Yet, he felt grateful that he was able to meet his children in a way. The situation was horrible, but that brought them together; and it was highly likely that if it had not happened then he would have never learned about them. He’d have probably died in combat before he ever heard whispers of them. No, he wasn’t going to look a gift horse in the mouth. He would continue on the path placed in front of him, for now at least. 
He just shrugged his shoulders and stayed silent. That must have been enough for Price as he just eyed him for a bit before looking down at what the EMTs were doing to stabilize Tommy. 
“Oh!” Price jolted in realization. “We never got your name, love! So sorry.” 
The girl looked up at them. She glanced at him then at John. Ghost must have looked strange sitting there in his black gear. They both definitely looked out of place in the ambulance. 
“It’s fine. I’m Violet… Mister…?” She wasn’t stuttering anymore but her voice was subdued and scratchy from her crying. 
“Call me John, young lady.” He nodded at her. “And this is Ghos-“
“Simon, will do.” He had no idea why he cut him off or why he gave her his name, but it brought a grin to Prices lips. 
“Oh, it’s like my da-“ The ambulance coming to a stop cut her off and the EMTs began off-loading the gurney. 
They moved themselves out of the way and followed closely behind as he was rolled into the emergency department. There were other ambulances dropping off patients from the attack. EMTs, doctors and nurses were coming in and out, and there was a heavy police presence at the entrances. 
Inside was more chaotic. The hospital was in Code Orange for mass casualty or disasters. 
Patients lay in gurneys as nurses and residents tended to them. Many of the dead rested under blood soaked sheets, yet to be moved to the morgue. Blood pooled on the white floors, some of it was stepped on and tracked throughout the rooms. Cleaning workers did their best to mop up the evidence of the nights tragedy. Very few had minor injuries. Friends and family were there searching for missing relatives. One of the smarter police officers began a missing persons board and had them write descriptions of the missing. 
As Violet stepped through the automatic door, she saw her mom finish tending to an older lady who had been grazed by bullets and suffered a concussion when she fell over. She fiddled with her gloves. It was loud in there but when she called for her mother, the older woman’s head shot up in fear. 
“Mom!”
Hearing this, Ghost’s eyes scanned the crowd. He had to find her. A face he hadn’t seen in years, unless he counted the similarities with his daughter. It wasn’t so hard. He’d recognize her face if he was blind and only had his hands to see. 
She was older, of course, but no less as beautiful as he remembered. Her hair was styled differently, likely due to her job, but still shined healthily. Her scrubs were in her favorite color and a blood stained white lab coat donned her body. She wore blue gloves and a face mask as she tended to her patients. 
“Violet!” She speedily walked to her daughter, passing between other doctors and nurses. Fingers tugged on latex and she dumped the gloves in a garbage can filling up with similar bloody items. Her hands rested on Violet’s shoulders as she couldn’t hug her with all the blood on her. 
She gasped when she saw Tommy. 
“Tommy!” She cried and tears flooded her eyes. Her hands went to his cut up face. “You were there?!”
An EMT asked her to help them. “This patient needs immediate care, doctor!”
“I-I’m sorry. I’m too close to the patient.” She stuttered. 
She looked around her in the chaos for a free doctor. She hardly noticed the two armed men hanging back. Her eyes stopped on her colleague. He had worked as a doctor for over forty years and had done thousands of surgeries. He had been a great mentor to her since she first started working at this hospital. 
“Jack! Dr. Yates!” She called over to him loud enough for others to look over. The older gentleman startled but made a bee-line for her. When he was close, she grabbed a part of his white sleeve. “Please, doctor, help my son. I’m too close to work on him properly.”
The grayed man gave a look over Tommy and had them immediately push him to an open operating room. He grasped her upper arm. “Don’t you worry your brilliant mind, sunny. We’ll get him spick and span in no time. Take a break for a few minutes, you’ve been running around since 5 this mornin’.”
Letting go, she only nodded along as they wheeled Tommy away. She allowed a tear to fall. It dripped onto the floor, mixing with other bodily fluids that fell from their patients. She tried not to let her fear of her losing another person get to her. 
Not again. Not here. Not now. 
“Mom?” Violet called for her worried about her sudden silence. She tugged on the back of her white coat, which was still white, surprisingly. That got her moving. 
“Violet? Are you alright? You’re okay, right? There’s blood all over you!” She inhaled once. “Do I need to get you som-“
“Mom! I’m fine! Honestly!” Violet interrupted, her bottom lip wobbled. “T-Tommy protected me. He saved me, mom!”
She sobbed harder than before and her mom, now not caring for the blood, pulled her in for a tight hug. They clung to each other desperately. Violet was shorter than her mom so she was able to burry her face into her neck. Tears wetting her skin and clothes. 
Movement behind them, made her look up, unsure if anyone else needed help. It was the two men that had come in with Violet. She had not really noticed them before because all her focus was directed to Tommy and Violet; her two most important things in life. Both had some blood on, what she now realized was military kits, and they stood there in silence carrying their weapons slung over their shoulders. One wore a funny fishing hat and the other had a rather fitting face mask for the overall mood of the day. The skull plated mask hid the face underneath. Her eyes lingered and he caught her gaze. 
Ghost stared at his once-wife in the eyes. The eyes that would always making him feel like he was falling deeper into her soul. She spoke but his ears weren’t working. Price answered and his hand whacking his arm made him blink twice and their staring ended when she looked at Prices hand. 
“No, we’re fine… Doctor…?” Price answered her worries of injury. 
“I’m Doctor-“
“Dr. Riley!” A nurse interrupted her. Ghost felt his chest tighten. She’d kept his name. “We need you here! He’s code blue-ing!”
She sprang from her daughters arms. “Coming! Violet go to my office and stay there for me, please. I’ll be back soon, hopefully.”
Violet nodded before her mom ran off to where the patient had just rolled in. She jumped onto the gurney and began chest compressions. The EMTs continued to the elevator and up to the operating rooms like nothing had happened. More nurses followed them into the large elevator. Her mom pumping that mans chest was the last she’d see of her for the next few hours. 
She was still a Riley. His Riley. After all these years, he remembered her saying that she wanted to keep her maiden name for her doctor status. He was always okay with that and knew she’d never change her mind, despite her taking his name, although hyphenated, when they married. He wondered what made her change her mind. Then he remembered that he had ‘died’ several months before her graduation as a resident. He reminisced on how he snuck in to see her one last time at the ceremony before running away to the battlefield. 
Price eyed Ghost as he stood there staring at the closed elevator doors, even when they opened as another body was taken down to the morgue. He looked tense, brows furrowed, pained, and understandably so. His whole life just flipped over and over in the matter of a few hours. 
But then Ghost glanced at his hands. Bloodied hands. Tommy’s blood. Then to Violet and then back again to the dried blood. The blood of his only son. It dawned on him that he almost lost him. Almost her. Both of them could have been stripped of their lives. And so easily too. He hardly knew them and that hurt him even more. 
“Ah… let’s escort you to your mums office, yeah?” Price called to Violet, who was also spacing out. 
She wiped her face and nodded. She led them to the stairwell and they climbed up two stories. Several corridors down and they were in a decent sized office. Price told them he would get them some snacks and drinks at the vending machines he saw awhile back. Ghost knew he was giving him time to talk to Violet. He was somewhat grateful and annoyed that Price knew what he needed. 
They both sat down on the cushioned chairs. Violet flung herself down with a loud sigh. She was drained both mentally, physically and emotionally. She wanted this nightmare to be over. 
“You’re Violet, right?” His deep voice asked and Violet’s eyes drifted upward. He’d heard her name multiple times, was even introduced, but he needed the confirmation again. 
“Yeah, I’m Violet… why?” She looked a bit confused, brow raised just like her mother used to give him. 
His chest tightened and he felt like he couldn’t get the words past his lips but he forced himself to. There was no better time than right now. “I- I just know your mum… that’s all.”
“Really? Why didn’t she recognize you?” She asked but Ghost pointed at his masked face and she blushed. “Oh, right.” 
The silence was awkward for a moment before Violet spoke, surprising Ghost with her words. 
“Well… I like your mask. Kinda edgy. It’s actually pretty cool… for an old man.”
“How do you know I’m old?” Ghost tilted his head slightly. 
Violet scoffed and crossed her arms, leaning back into the chair. “You know my mom, so you’ve gotta be old.” Ghost almost rolled his eyes; she was gonna be the death of him. Then she looked contemplative. 
“Do you think Tommy will still be able to be in the army?” She looked at his eyes, her brows furrowed even more. “It’s been his dream for the longest and now that he’s in, I don’t think he’d ever get out… but if he’s discharged, I think that’ll hurt him the most.” 
Ghost didn’t say anything right away so she continued her little rant. “Mom tried to get him to go to uni, but his heart was set on the army ever since he learned that our dad was in. He held onto that dream for so long and when mom let him go, well, I’ve never seen him so happy…”
Her breath shortened as tears ran down her face. “I—I should have been paying more attention. It’s my fault. I have no situational awareness, damnit, even Tommy’s told me that before. If I’d noticed sooner or realized what was going on, he wouldn’t be hurt. I’m the older twin. I should be-be the one taking care of him!” She sobbed harder. 
Ghost came to kneel in front of her. He took her hand that was twisting her bloody shirt. “It’s not your fault. You, nor anyone there, knew what was about to happen. Terrorists have no regards for the lives of the innocent while doing things that would harm them.”
“Tommy’s hurt but I can tell that he’s strong. I’ve been hurt like that before and I healed up fine. Plus he has even greater care here. They’ll take care of him and you only need to keep your head up and know that Tommy’ll pull through.” He continued. “He’s young so he’ll bounce back well enough to return to his unit. Don’t you worry your pretty lil’ head ‘bout that.”
“Thanks.” She laugh-cried. “But it’s hard to take you seriously with that mask.” She giggled. 
Ghost huffed. “Well, Tommy pulled some heroics back there saving you. Might even earn a brag rag with the right recommendations…”
Violet’s confused head tilt made him explain the meaning. “It’s a medal.”
Her eyes brightened. “You’d do that?”
He hummed. “Captain Price might put in a good word too, but yeah, he deserves it.”
There was a sudden and somber silence. His hand gripped his knee to prevent it from bouncing. 
“Ah… any plans for uni? Or something…?” Bollocks, how the hell do you talk to a 17 year old girl, who is also your child but doesn’t know it? Improvise… he guessed?
Violet told him that she was debating going to vet school or medical school to become a surgeon like her mother. She wasn’t sure which university she would apply to. 
“Tommy keeps teasing me that I should join him in the army as a field surgeon. But… um, I think I wanna help out people in our community here.” She chuckled softly. “I told him that if he ever got hurt he could come to me to patch him up, but that I’d have to hurt him again for even getting injured in the first place.”
Ghost smiled under his mask. Mask. His mask?
Maybe he wasn’t thinking clearly. Perhaps one too many whacks to the ole head. Or maybe it was the high of meeting his long lost children for the first time. Ghost wasn’t sure what it was…
His hand reached up, curling under the bottom of his balaclava, and pulled the black cloth over his head in one tug. The higher it went, the more his chin, lips, nose, cheeks, eyes, and hair was revealed. 
Violet’s breath hitched as she took his face in. Her eyes roamed over every feature and scars. She knew this face, from the back of her mind she knows that this face is like the one going through surgery right now. Like the one in the frame sitting on her mother’s desk right in front of her. Tears began to burn her eyes but did not fall. Her lip wobbled. 
~~~~~
“Violet, I am your father…” Simon’s eyes stared into hers for a moment before closing tightly. His brows scrunched together and his lips tugged into a fine line. 
“Was t-that a Star Wars reference? Or are you being serious?” Violet asked confused, burning tears finally falling. 
“You’ve seen Star Wars?” Stop deflecting, Simon!
“What?! Don’t change the subject Mr. Simon!” She gasped, her eyes widening. “Mister… Simon. Simon. Simon?”
“Yeah?” He asked, swallowing hard. 
“This doesn’t make sense! I-I must be hallucinating. Maybe, maybe I actually did die or something.” Violet’s voice shook. She closed her eyes and moved her head side to side. There was a subtle shake to her body. “Nope! This is not fucking real! You’re supposed to be dead! Dead, I tell you!”
Oh god, she’s reverting back to her drama club days. 
“Umm… language?” Not the time to reprimand her for her words. “I mean. Sorry. It’s… It’s just a really, really long story. I actually don’t know how I’d tell-“
“Daddy!” Violet sobbed and before Simon could comprehend it, the teenager had her arms wrapped around him as much as she could with his size and body armor. 
The shock in his eyes softened with her continued sobbing. It struck him in his heart. All the walls he’d built since before joining the Task Force began to crumble. Piece by piece, chunks began to disintegrate. His own eyes burned with tears that hadn’t fallen in years. It was almost a relief when they did start to fall. They dropped onto Violet’s shoulder and rolled down her back. 
Simon didn’t know how long they held onto each other for. Hours or days could pass but he would rather still be in the newfound embrace of his daughter. Violet had settled into soft sniffles and little hiccups, eventually falling asleep in his lap. His own tears had dried, for now, leaving streaks down his cheeks. For a moment, it felt peaceful despite the chaos several floors down and a few streets away. His arms tightened around Violet. He wasn’t sure if he could ever let her go… 
His eyes staring off into the wall flashed to the door when it was pushed open. And there she was. 
~~~~~
Dr. Riley sighed as the sound of the EKG flatlining continued. They had initially brought the patient back from cardiac arrest and proceeded with the surgery. However, in the last fifteen minutes he began to show signs of another cardiac episode. The nurses and she had tried their best but unfortunately the patient’s wounds were too much for his body to handle. 
Pulling off her bloody gloves and dumping them into the hazardous waste disposal, she told the nurses to take a breather since they’d been going at it for hours by that point. Hell, her shift had long been over when her daughter and son had arrived but she had stayed. She couldn’t bear leaving while knowing that many people were suffering. She’d seen over a dozen patients when the casualties started pouring in, almost tripling her patient count for the day. 
A quick change of clothes in a designated room and she was walking back to her office. Eerily, the floor her office was on was quiet. There were other busy wards here but the chaos was concentrated downstairs. She heard her crocs squeak on the polished floors. It used to make her blush at the loudness of the sound but now she couldn’t give a fuck. Her patients needed her, damnit!  As if a squeaky shoe would hold her back from reaching her patients on time just because she was embarrassed by the sounds. 
Reaching the door to her office, she noticed that the light was on letting her know that Violet had made it in one piece. 
“Hey, Violet, are you hungry-!” Her eyes widened in mild confusion and concern at what she saw, before glaring slightly. “What the fuck?!”
Her Violet was in the arms of a strange grown man, she been crying, clearly as they stained her cheeks. She nearly lost her top and yelled more before focusing on the man’s features. 
It was like seeing a ghost. 
He said something but it was like cotton balls were stuffed into her ears. Whatever it was she probably needed to see an otolaryngologist. She felt something fall down her face and along her neck and into her clean scrubs. Her vision blurred. She wasn’t sure if it was from tears building up or her body moving quickly in their direction. 
~~~~~
Simon called for her by name. He hadn’t said it in a very long time. It honestly hurt him to. After all, he had left her alone and with his children no less, although he hadn’t known. He’d spent some time thinking about it while holding onto Violet. If he would have stayed had she been able to tell him about them. He would like to think that, yes, he would have stayed, but Simon wasn’t sure if his own insecurities and trauma related to his abusive father would push him from wanting to claim such a responsibility. 
She stared blankly at him. Her dull and tired eyes worried him. He knew she’d had a long and hard day. Simon missed the shine in her eyes from long ago. He was starting to feel strange with her gawking. He shifted in his seat as softly as he could to not disturb Violet. 
The movement seemed to awaken her and gave her the strength to move closer to him. But her knees weakened and Simon had to outstretch an arm in order to catch her. A loud sob fell from her lips. Slightly chapped due to lack of time to care for them that day. The jerkiness of his movement woke up Violet and when she saw her crying mother in the arm of her dad, her tears renewed. 
“Mom!” She tasted salt. The words were taken from her. 
Simon pulled her up into his lap too, before tightening his arms around both of them. Both of his girl’s hands were clutching him equally as tight. They were all breathing heavily and their bodies shook with each sob, with each inhale and exhale. Simon rested his head against theirs. Fingers tangled in their hair. 
After they all calmed down a bit, Simon began to explain what happened all those years ago. What happened to his family, why he left, and that if he had known that he was going to be a parent that he would have taken the time to think things more carefully before doing anything drastic. 
She raised her hand against his stubbled cheek. “It’s not your fault, Simon. I should have told you about the pregnancy sooner. I-I just wanted to surprise you when you came home, but…” 
He knew the ‘but,’ he never came home. Only a news article about a whole family dying in a house fire. Dog tags left to be found hours later. His only living ‘relative’ was his father. 
He needed to stop thinking about his father, who he believes may or may not still be around. But those fears of being like him as an adult presented as usual. It was a constant struggle to let those feelings go. Feelings of inadequacy surfaced and since his face wasn’t covered as usual, it was easier to see by his frown and furrowed brow. 
She recognized that look on his face despite the many years apart. She held his face in her palm. He leaned into it, his own hand coming up to hold hers closer to him. The look in her eyes told him all the reassurances that he craved. 
Violet watched all this in awe. Never would she have thought that she’d be witness to the love between her mother and father. She tucked herself closer to her father’s chest. Violet had grown even more tired after the attack and the crying. Her eyes drooped and a sigh left her lips as she fell asleep. Simon’s arm subconsciously pulled her closer. 
It felt like hours but only thirty minutes had passed before Dr. Riley got restless. She tapped Simon on the shoulder. 
“I should go check if there are any updates on Tommy.” She said and Simon, reluctantly, let her go. “I’ll come back if there’s any news. And I’ll bring you both something to eat. Surprisingly, the cafeteria has a decent sandwich selection.”
Ghost nodded and readjusted his grip on Violet to hold her with both arms. 
“I can have a cot brought in if you want?” She looked lovingly between the two. A soft smile tugged at her lips. 
“Ah… I think I’m fine, for now at least.” His pale cheeks flushed. He just couldn’t let his little girl go. Especially not when she’s sleeping so peacefully in his arms. 
She nodded and left the room. 
During that time, his phone had buzzed and a text from Price glowed back at him. He texted that he had the next few days off and to not come in to work for any reason other than emergencies. 
Simon texted back a simple, “Okay.”
~~~
Dr. Riley returned with food in paper bags and good news. Tommy was in post-op and was being moved to a private room soon. She told Simon that she could take them there. So, Simon stood with Violet in his arms, who surprisingly has not been awoken by the move. His arms were under her knees and back. 
They had arrived before Tommy so Simon took the time to survey the room. It was rather large with a couch on each side of the room. His love told him that they pulled out into beds if they wanted to use them. Simon lowered Violet onto the blue couch, resting her head on the pillow and covering her with the provided gray hospital blanket. 
Thirty minutes later and Tommy was rolled in by a team of nurses. The principle doctor residing over his care began to explain the next steps in Tommy’s recovery. It felt like a lot but Simon was intimately familiar to the process due to his own previous injuries. 
Afterwards, his love was finally able to rest so she sat next to him on the other blue couch. There was distance between them and Simon couldn’t get his body to melt into the soft couch. He could feel her glancing at him from the corner of her eyes. He spied her hand inching towards his. His eyes looked and then looked away. He argued with himself to just grab hers. He finally said ‘fuck it all’ and just wrapped his arm around her shoulders and pulled her whole body closer. 
A soft squeak escaped her lips. He buried his face into her hair and breathed in deeply. It still smelled like her shampoo. She melted into his embrace. 
“Simon?” He hummed. “I don’t know how, but, thank you.”
He looked her in those eyes that kept him awake at night. “Of course.” 
~~~
Two days later… 
~~~
Bleary brown eyes fluttered open. He took several moments to blink away the crust on his eyes. The blindly white room was dark with only a soft amber lamp glowing in the far corner. He felt like his body was stuck to what he was laying on. He looked down and saw white sheets. 
A flash of dark movement caught his eye from one of the pull out beds, fully stretched out and occupied. He shifted his stiff neck to see who or what it was. 
He saw his own eyes. 
Maybe he was dead. After all, he swore he saw his father sitting there by his mother. He tried his hardest but the sedatives won the battle. His tired eyes blinked slowly before finally closing. His breath evening out in slumber. 
Wide brown eyes stared at the monitor. Only relaxing when the machine kept beeping at a constant rate. Then, Simon laid back down and clutched her closer. She sighed and moved closer to him. And damn was he happy in that moment. 
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rafescurtainbangz · 2 months ago
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Brat - Rafe Cameron Blurb
+18 Minor DNI
DomFrat!Rafe x Brat!Reader
⭐️ republished ⭐️
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+18 Minor DNI
🪄 name calling, ownership kink, swearing, drinking, degradation, boot riding, reader loves Rafe’s hands, pet names (baby, babygirl, daddy, etc etc), slapping, rough touch, reader is a brat, mentions of smut
📖 based off an ask: ask: per your last reblog… rafe telling you “come here” when you piss him off at a party but you tell him no and slip away knowing he can’t make a scene going after you and you even try sneaking out with your friends but he catches you out of nowhere and pushes you into an empty room before you can react and goes “you just made shit so much worse for yourself, now i’m not telling you again to come. here.”
✨ “You just made shit so much worse for yourself, now I’m not telling you again. Come here,” Rafe snarls pulling you again. You stumble slightly, catching yourself before tumbling, just to get plowed again, falling to your knees before the door slams behind you. He towers above you, looking down at you from the closed door. ✨
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Reader’s POV:
“Who’s this from?
“Compliments of the gentleman that’s been stalkin’ your ass all night,” Sarah smiles uneasily. You peer around the party for your boyfriend but the crowd’s too thick. You chuckle to yourself, grabbing the bottle off her hand, taking a pull from it.
“Your brother needs to calm down.”
“You’re playing a dangerous game,” she sings. You roll your eyes and smile. “He hates being ignored. If you didn’t already know-”
“News to me,” you smirk before taking another shot, wincing as it burns your throat. “Well, I don’t like being ignored either… I’m just messin’ with him a little. Givin’ him a taste of his own medicine.”
Sarah blurts out a laugh, shaking her head. “This plan’s gonna go to shit.”
“Meh,” you sigh. “Either way, I’m winning.”
Sarah’s face turns sour. “Do I wanna know what you’re winning, babe?”
You chuckle before taking another pull. “Absolutely not.”
Lucky for me a brat always wins. What did I learn? A lesson? Not a chance. I learned that ignoring Rafe gets me punishment or gets me groveling, both of which I love; Rafe’s large hands wrapped around my throat, my ass riddled with bruises, overstimulated to the point of tears. But I could also get something different entirely. Rafe’s raspy, love-laced voice in my ear apologizing between deep kisses and deeper strokes, begging me for forgiveness as he makes me cum again and again. It’s a win-win situation.
“What are you thinking about now?” Sarah asks, giving you a side-eye. You smile devilishly and she rolls her eyes away. “My brother… When are you not?”
You grab Sarah’s hand, making your way to the makeshift dance floor. You can see a little group of your friends already gathered together, your heart picks up speed as you catch a glimpse of Kelce, knowing Rafe isn’t too far away. Sarah grabs your hand, squeezing it a few times, gesturing with a nod as Rafe joins his group with a full beer.
He sits down on the couch, focus immediately shifting to you. No matter how large the crowd is that man would never let you out of his sight. Rafe takes out his phone, scowling as he types up a message. BUZZ. The notification comes instantly. You snag it out of your purse, eyeing the banner on the lock screen.
Rafe: there she is
Rafe: come here, baby
You give in, writing a message of your own before blowing him a little air kiss.
You: one sec
Rafe’s eyes narrow on his screen, brows furrowed in confusion like he’s trying to translate a foreign language.
Rafe: excuse me
Rafe: no
Rafe: try again
You: one sec 💕
He laughs in disbelief, throwing back the rest of his beer. Rafe tries to focus on the conversation around him but he can’t even last a minute. The blonde shuts his eyes, rolling out his neck a little, taking a deep breath before trying again.
“Come here,” he mouths through a fake grin.
“One sec,” you mouth back, lifting one finger with an angelic smile.
Much to Rafe’s displeasure, you start to dance again, slinking your hands up your thighs, hips shifting to the music. The song changes and you squeal with delight just stoking the fire. “My favorite,” you mouth to him again, pointing up to the speakers. Rafe nods his head visibly annoyed, anger boiling, threatening to roll over if you don’t get off your bullshit.
You grind your hips to the beat, watching as Topper checks in on Rafe. “We’re fine,” he sneers, brushing Thornton off before he can even get all the words out.
Another song starts. Rafe crosses his arms over his strong chest, watching you carefully. His blue eyes dance over your body; features softening slightly, relaxing a little more into the seat.
He’s enjoying this too much.
“Wanna get some air?” You ask, taking Sarah’s hand before she can respond, tugging her toward the deck of the kook mansion. You take the party with you, a small group of your friends following along, hopefully making it all that more frustrating for Rafe, it’s one thing for Rafe to take you away from Sarah, but it’s a whole other thing to finesse you out of a group-
“Shit!” You gasp, getting pulled back out of nowhere, shoved the next.
“You just made shit so much worse for yourself, now I’m not telling you again. Come here,” Rafe snarls pulling you again. You stumble slightly, catching yourself before tumbling, just to get plowed again, falling to your knees before the door slams behind you. He towers above you, looking down at you from the closed door.
Before he can say anymore you get on your knees, crawling toward him submissively before sitting down on your knees at his feet, looking up at him with your most innocent eyes.
“Why are you such a brat? Huh?” He asks before slapping your cheeks, making you curse out a breath. Rafe cups your stinging skin. You keep quiet, not giving in, refusing to give up easily even though your heart is racing.
“Tough girl,” he huffs. “Lookin’ up at me from her knees and she’s still a fuckin’ brat. Can’t even say you’re sorry? No one ever taught you any manners? You know how embarrassing that was for me? I don’t ask anyone for anything twice.”
You beat your lashes, arching your back slightly, giving him the perfect view of your tits in your little party dress. Your hands brush up his legs, resting on his muscular thighs. Rafe gets lost in the moment, looking down at his pretty little thing. He waits a few moments for you to speak, still getting nothing from you. He lets out a loud frustrated groan, tipping his head back before hanging it low.
“Fuck, baby… I’m sorry for ignoring you. It was just business. Just making money. That doesn’t mean I should be neglecting you. M’sorry about that. Alright? I know you. I know how you get. But this… this behavior of yours. It ends now. Yeah?”
You turn your face slightly, pressing a kiss on his hand before returning your cheek to it, leaning into him slightly as your long nails squeeze into his thighs. “I love you, baby,” you coo, melting him with your gaze and touch as his deep laugh fills the empty guest bedroom.
He smiles and shakes his head, looking away, stiffening his jaw before returning to you. “I love you too, baby,” he breathes, brushing his rough thumb on your bottom lip. You wrap your lips around his thumb, making the corners of his lips curl into a wicked smile, eyes hazed with lust. “Stop,” Rafe grunts.
“What?” You whisper before returning your lips to his fingers.
“You’re startin’ to really piss me off.”
“Why’s that?” You ask as you move a little closer, resting your pussy on top of his shoe, giving him a few slow grinds.
“J-Jesus, baby. ‘Cause… Because you’re manipulating me. I don’t stand a chance against you. It’s frustrating – you… you frustrate me.”
“You like it,” you smile, tracing his long, hard cock through his jeans.
“You’re unbelievable,” he mutters.
“You love it.” Rafe watches you carefully as you swirl your tongue around his thumb, making his ocean eyes roll back.
“No – no. I love you. And, I don’t love this shit… this shit is unacceptable.”
“Unaccept-” Rafe slaps your cheek hard, stealing the words off your lips. “Rafe-”
“Shut. The fuck. Up,” he warns, snatching your cheeks with a single hand, squeezing tight. “Babygirl… what’s gotten into you. Huh?”
You feel your cunt tighten around nothing, pussy begging to be filled. You can tell he’s loving every second of it, getting off on your defiance alone even though he’s saying the later.
Rafe loosens his hold, letting you speak, tapping his fingers against your bottom lip. “So, I’m only gonna ask you this once. Are you gonna be a hole or are you gonna be my good girl?”
You let out a little laugh that has him looking down at you in disbelief. A smirk tugs on your lips – Rafe can’t help but return the same. “I’m just a hole for you, Daddy.”
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butterflydm · 8 months ago
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more WoT s3 spec - what we know vs what we're guessing at
I've been poking at what we know about s3 vs what we can reasonably guess, so I wanted to break that down a bit.
So there are a few things we know just about the structure of how the show has worked so far: we know they shoot in blocks of two episodes each and that each of those blocks is going to have the same director for both episodes. Because of this info, we can make some guesses at where specific episodes may land. We also have some casting info (wotseries.com being a great resource here).
They tend to have a major reveal in the fourth episode - Nynaeve being incredibly powerful in the One Power in 1x04; Selene being Lanfear in 2x04.
What we know for certain:
Rhuidean & the Waste will appear (Rand & Egwene's storyline).
Tanchico will appear (Nynaeve & Elayne's storyline).
The Two Rivers will appear (Perrin's storyline).
Rand and Perrin will each get focus episodes akin to Nynaeve having "What Might Be" and Egwene having "Eyes Without Pity" in s2.
We have four episode titles: "To Race The Shadow"; "A Glimpse of Crimson"; "Goldeneyes"; and "He Who Comes With The Dawn".
Sea Folk are confirmed for S3.
Potential leaks include:
Mat, Min, and Thom all being part of Nynaeve & Elayne's storyline in Tanchico. Big change for Mat & Min, but matches canon for Thom. And since show-onlys have only seen Thom with Mat and Rand, it would make sense to use Mat to re-introduce us to him.
Reports of the actresses reported to be playing Morgase and Elaida seen at a castle which is almost certainly in Caemlyn (Andoran banners spotted), most likely for the first or second episode due to the timing.
An actress playing Maigran (one of the Aiel from the Rhuidean glass columns sequence) is listed under the director who is being used for eps 3 and 4.
An actress has been cast to play an older version of Latra and I really like @wheeloftimeofficial's idea that we'll see her as the ancient Aes Sedai who establishes Rhuidean in the glass column memories, especially since the younger actress also has s3 listed on her CV.
We have (unofficially) confirmed castings for Faile & Galad.
Hints we've gotten from interviews & bts info:
In an interview filmed before the actors' strike, Daniel mentions Lan having some really good relationship scenes with Nynaeve, so we know that there's interaction between those characters before their plotlines separate, implying that we will not begin with everyone already all off on their separate journeys, like they were in 2x01.
Also from Daniel, it's implied that there are training scenes between Lan and Rand (could happen at any point, since Lan is likely to be in Rand's storyline the entire season).
From what Josha has said, the show will be pivoting to a more familial relationship between Egwene and Rand next season (which matches the book timing).
Rafe made a point of mentioning that Elayne healing Rand was to flag to the audience that this was a relationship to pay attention to (which implies we'll get at least some movement on that relationship in s3).
Josha also says that there is "way more togetherness" for Two Rivers' characters in s3 than in s2.
In an unrelated interview on screenrant, Rima Te Waita (Sheriam) mentioned that she will not be in s3 but, if s4 is greenlit, she will be in s4.
Josha and Ayoola posted some cute instas of each other after finishing up the South Africa shooting stint near Cape Town, which might be a hint towards our potential AviRand interactions (could also just be the actors being cute!).
Guesses based on book & show knowledge:
It seems likely to me that Gawyn & Galad will be introduced in the same episode as Morgase and Elaida, which I am tentatively going to guess will be episode 2.
I think that Verin, Alanna & their Warders are going to be getting out of Cairhien as quickly as possible. And that they are pretty conveniently set up to head to their TSR storyline.
I am pretty torn about when the coup will happen! I feel like it happening this season feels pretty much a lock because there really isn't any more "White Tower storyline" until the coup happens, and they do already have the set made. But it could either happen pretty early on or fairly late in the season. Maybe episode five? That lets us meet Elaida in episode 2, gives her and possibly Gawyn & Galad time to get to the White Tower, maybe we get some scenes of her politicking in the WT in episode 4, with the trigger being pulled in episode 5 or 6. But another possibility is that the coup happens right away, while all those Sisters are still in Cairhien and we see Liandrin take the lead on something like stilling Siuan and Leane, which would put the White Tower in chaos before Elaida even arrives. There are at least two Black Ajah Sisters in Cairhien, after all, and Liandrin likes to act extra-judicially, and she might want to try to make sure that Siuan is taken care of before anyone has a chance to out her (Liandrin) as Black Ajah. But there is also a chance that it might happen in the finale, so that we can parallel Moiraine & Siuan's 'downfalls'. So really this one is a wildcard for me. It isn't really directly tied to any other specific events in TSR, so it can happen whenever.
We will get the glass columns in episode 3 or 4. In the books, it happened as soon as Rand landed in the Waste, basically, but the show could potentially do Cold Rocks Hold first, depending on how Rand is getting to the Waste. I used to lean towards it happening in ep3, but after learning the leak about Mat being in Tanchico, it made me wonder about ep4, maybe, as that could potentially lead to Mat going through the doorways (just speculation with zero leaks or spoilers to back it up but I like it a lot lol) from Tanchico to Rhuidean either at the end of ep4 or the start of ep5, leaving Nynaeve & Elayne's storyline and going to Rand & Egwene's.
I do keep thinking about Josha saying that the Two Rivers' kids would have "way more togetherness" than in s3, which seems difficult if they all separate by or after ep2 and then don't reunite the entire season. I guess technically it would be true because they don't reunite in s2 until the final moments of 2x08 but feels somewhat underwhelming to mention, lol.
I do still suspect that we're getting Lanfear & Moiraine with the doorway at the end of the season.
So, a tentative outline. Now we leave behind the more solid leaks and knowledge and enter into the wild speculations. Please check out @markantonys' recent post too, she's got some fun speculations!
3x01: To Race the Shadow
"Way more togetherness" between the Two Rivers group than in s2, so says Josha. This is also where we have to be getting the Lan & Nynaeve romantic scenes that Daniel keeps hyping up, lol.
Moiraine and Rand are going to be arguing about his next plans.
Something will happen that makes them realize that Something Is Up in Tanchico -- this might be a first Dream from Egwene that leads them in the direction of the museum? Which also leads to her talking to Amys, which is why she decides to go with Rand instead of going with Nynaeve & Elayne. The big question for me is if they are going to Tanchico because of Liandrin or if they go for other reasons and then run into Liandrin also being there to get the same thing that they're getting.
Now Mat may go into a doorway here as speculated by @markantonys (the room of curiosities) but for this specific outline, I'm going to say that he doesn't, and instead he chooses to go with Elayne & Nynaeve because he's running away from Rand (after the Stabbening). This pulls in something that Mat tries to do a lot in the books but gives him a new motivation that fits his show character.
I think Lanfear is going to warn Rand about the rest of the Forsaken being free but potentially also send Liandrin to Tanchico to try to get the, uh, plot token for her potential use in the future (a girl needs a back-up plan).
Lanfear talking to Rand might be another thing that Rand and Moiraine argue about.
Rand and Egwene are going to have their official 'break-up' and then we'll see their more platonic relationship develop over the course of the season. I also feel like we have to have at least a scene or two with Rand and Elayne to establish them feeling Some Kind of Way about each other, to build on that moment from 2x08.
3x02: A Glimpse of Crimson
Good episode title for a Red Ajah & Andor episode!
I'm going to guess that Rand & co are going to be stopping in Caemlyn (my feelings are similar to @markantonys about us potentially getting a garden introduction between Egwene & Gawyn here, and then having Rand & Egwene meet Elaida & Morgase (and Galad?). Elaida will have her Foretelling about Rand and freak herself out.
Our group hears the rumors about the Two Rivers, and Perrin decides to go investigate. The question is how is Rand going to get to the Waste from Caemlyn? I don't feel like they would introduce Portal Stones as a one-off if they haven't done it before, so I think there's a chance that Loial might go with Rand instead of Perrin, as Perrin doesn't need to go through the Ways to get to the Two Rivers (of course, then they would need to change how the battle resolves in 3x07).
(alternatively: there's always the Lanfear express, I guess, lol)
This could also be when Elayne, Nynaeve, & Mat arrive in Tanchico, and their introduction to the city is our B plot. I don't think they would throw all the plots at them at once and I feel like just introducing Thom first would be a good start for the first episodes in Tanchico.
3x03: Unknown
Rand & co arrive in the Waste, but I'm going to send them to Cold Rocks Hold for now, instead of straight to Rhuidean. This gives Rand and Aviendha time to bond, Rand and Moiraine time to fight, Rand and Lan time to train together, and gives the audience a chance to get to know the Aiel culture in a bit more of a relaxed setting. Then we get an attack by Shadowspawn and Rand gets the reminder that the other Forsaken have been let free and don't share Ishamael and Lanfear's feelings about him.
Another plot will be in Tanchico, involving Nynaeve, Elayne, and Mat investigating, running into Min and/or Egeanin or Tuon taking Egeanin's role. This may be where we get our early encounters with Moghedien (she Compels one or more of our characters to spill the beans to her about their plans) and potentially where she reveals herself to Liandrin & co as one of the Chosen and takes control of their group after playing servant for part of the episode.
We also have Perrin & co arriving in the Two Rivers and getting the lay of the land. This could be a fairly emotional episode for Perrin, due to memories of Laila's death. Maybe when Perrin says goodbye to Laila (putting his ring on her grave/memorial?) and potentially our first sighting of Faile.
3x04: Unknown
Rand goes to Rhuidean and into the glass columns. This is the main plot of the episode and Rand's focus episode of the season.
We get the history of the Aiel here, and learn about Rand's ancestors.
Subplot: Aviendha is told that she is destined to be a Wise One (maybe she accidentally channeled during the fight at Cold Rocks Hold?) and deals with idea that she has to leave behind being a Maiden.
Our Tanchico B-plot leads to Mat entering through the twisted doorway in the museum, For Reasons, and getting his prophecies. Maybe this same plotline leads to Elayne and Nynaeve finding dream ter'angreal, and to Tuon/Egeanin realizing that Elayne and Nynaeve are channelers, and potentially learns that all sul'dam are, and then leaves our main plotline at this time.
3x05: Unknown
When Rand leaves the glass columns, he finds Mat hanging on the tree outside, and saves his life (we've gotten a few different pieces of foreshadowing about Mat being hanged, so I feel like it will happen at some point). Mat says he was just in Tanchico.
We catch up with Perrin in the Two Rivers, with him learning to move past his grief as he gets to know Faile.
Because we've already done Cold Rocks Hold, this means that Rand & co can go straight to Alcair Dal at this point.
Aviendha and Rand bond over their lives being dictated by being able to use the One Power and not having any choices about their future.
On the way to Alcair Dal, we meet the traders, who are hiding Lanfear and Asmodean in their ranks, and Lanfear sees that Rand is getting closer to Aviendha and Does Not Approve.
Nynaeve and Elayne worry about where Mat has disappeared to and experiment with the dream ter'angreal that they recently discovered in the museum (might only be one: the twisted stone ring, so that channeling isn't needed for it), and run into Birgitte in the dream. She gives them a warning but they realize that this is the same place that Egwene was talking about in 3x01 and are excited that they might be able to communicate with her.
3x06: Unknown
Another journey into TAR for Nynaeve (maybe a successful contact with Egwene?), and she encounters Birgitte again, but Moghedien too, and this leads to Birgitte getting ripped out of TAR and bonded by Elayne to save her life.
Moiraine tells Rand that he needs to go to Tear, to fulfill more of the prophecies, but Rand is resistant.
The Two Rivers ramps up for the battle.
This would also be a good spot for the coup, imo.
3x07: Goldeneyes
The Battle of the Two Rivers. Potentially Perrin's focus episode as well, as he comes into his own as a leader. I think that it would be good to push any confirmed Perrin/Faile romance forward into the future, so they will still just have some vibes for now.
We get some pieces moving into place for the other storylines: Rand arrives at Alcair Dal; Nynaeve and Elayne make plans to return to the museum.
3x08: He Who Comes With The Dawn
Desperate to get through to Rand and worrying that he is focusing on the Aiel instead of being the Dragon Reborn, Moiraine went back to Rhuidean to try to use the doorway, as when Mat talked about his experiences there, she recognized what he was talking about and wants answers of her own.
Rand announces himself at Alcair Dal, drawing the attention of Lanfear, who makes her pitch to him that We Could Rule Together, worrying that she's losing her hold over him after seeing him getting closer to Aviendha. She tells him about Asmodean and about him potentially teaching Rand so that he can reach his potential.
Inside the doorway, Moiraine gets answers that she doesn't like about Rand and Lanfear (sort of merging her going into the doorway in Tear with her going into the silver rings).
On the Tanchico side of things, we have our big Tanchico encounter between Nynaeve and Moghedien, which results in Nynaeve breaking her block. Nynaeve and Elayne escape Tanchico on a Sea Folk ship, heading towards Tear, potentially bringing Min & Thom along with them.
After talking with Lanfear, Rand is let out of his 'bubble' at Alcair Dal as Couladin declares that HE is the Car'a'carn and he will prove it by leading the Aiel to conquer the wetlands (setting up s4 to be a combo of TFoH/LoC, with a hint of TDR with the destination being Tear instead of Cairhien). Rand realizes that the fake dragons on Couladin's arms were put there by Asmodean and goes after him -- Asmodean Skims back to Rhuidean and he and Rand battle, and Lanfear arrives, puts the block on Asmodean and offers him up as a teacher to Rand. Moiraine takes advantage of Lanfear's focus on Rand to yeet both of them into the doorway while channeling, based on the knowledge that she learned inside, melting the doorway. We see in the Tanchico storyline that the other doorway melts at the same time, leaving them no exit.
And I agree with @markantonys that possibly the most effective stinger would be the reveal that Tuon is the DotNM, but if there is no Tuon in this season, we could have it be a Forsaken (Sammael) setting up shop in Tear, to set the scene for the upcoming season.
It is a lot more cliffhanger-y than our previous season finales and I'm sure that my thoughts on it will change as we get closer and learn more spoilers, but that is my wild speculation for this specific week!
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charles-leclerizz · 9 months ago
Text
TRAILER : THE BEGINING
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🏁 Content warnings : Swearing.
🏁 Spoiler alert : Please read the masterlist, Character sketch and Team sketch to understand.
🏁 Genre : Drama, Action, Sports
🏁 Reading time : 15 minutes, 6 seconds
🏁 Word count : 3.0.k (3021 words)
🏁 Chapter summary : It all begins now.
🏁 Author's note : So, this is it, welcome to the beginning of this wild ride. Just wanted to explain a few things [so skip this right now if you're not really interested, no hard feelings !] Now, this format is probably confusing, basically the first part of this is the trailer, how it would look on Netflix, the actual video/film. And the writing after the banner, Behind the Scenes, is literally behind the scenes, what isn't shown on camera. Second, this whole series is meant to be very dramatic, it's entertainment made by "Netflix" [not really, please don't sue me] for God sake. With all that said, Enjoy!
Masterlist · 🪷 Aisha · 🪷 Porsche F1 Team · 🪷
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[Please play this song whilst reading the trailer & feel free to stop once we get behind the scenes with the drivers !]
The screen fades from black to show a Porsche F1 car skidding down the track, the sound of screeching rubber against the tarmac harmonises with the energetic music that pumps behind the video.
Circular shots of a driver climbing out of the car from different angles flash across, and just before they tug off their helmet the scene changes to the paddock, pit crew, mechanics and drivers rush past in a blur, their differently coloured uniforms merge together like lights in a city scape. Suddenly, everything stops and the music fades away momentarily.
“In the fast-paced world of formula 1,”
Scenes of driving legends hoisting up their trophies with happy grins and champagne soaked racing gear flash past. Ayrton Senna, Michael Schumacher, Kimi Räikkönen.
“Where every second counts and emotions run high.”
The grating sounds of cars speeding past bursts into the frame, Max Verstappen shaking his fists ambitiously as he wins, yet another grand prix, Charles Leclerc as he wins in Spa and Monza, Carlos sainz and Lando Norris partnering up in the Singapore 2023- “Yeah, it’s on purpose.” The Spaniard grits out just as the narrator begins to speak again.
“Our team is about to redefine the game,”
The narrator is revealed, a woman, tall and proud as she sits in front of a grey backdrop. Her blonde hair is cut to a sharp bob and her glasses, astute and black sit high on her nose as she laughs jauntily and arches a well-managed, bleached brow at one of the three camera’s recording her, “Is that good?” she huffs out, thick Manchester accent shining through her cheerful words.
Black takes over once again, and the Indian flag, flapping in the wind from a tall pole that reaches high into the sky is shown, the bright, proud colours shining against the pale, blue sky. The camera pans down to the bottom of the ground, where the same driver,who was emerging from the car in the begging is looking up, at their flag.
But instead of their helmet securely fastened around their face, it’s held between the crook of their elbow and waist. The white base is glossy as multiple sponsor logos are littered around the entire frame, along with the black, bold letters “PATEL” being showed off at the back, currently visible to the camera along with the behind of the driver’s racing suit.
The shot pans up, revealing long flowing hair, black thick strands a contrast to her off white racing suit. The same flag peeks out from between the chunks of her fluttering locks, large and proud on the expanse of her back. The driver begins to turn and just as her red painted lips come into view the scene changes and a different narrator begins to speak again.
“From the makers of 'Drive to Survive' comes a new Netflix Original Series that takes you behind the scenes of the most exhilarating sport on the planet.”
Scenes of the woman running across the paddock and into her garage, her teammate not far behind overlay the announcement.
Another moment is revealed, this time of her ducking into her car, glove covered hands braced on the halo as her face turns upwards towards a racing engineer who speaks to her. She nods before turning to look directly into the camera and lowering herself into the cockpit.
The woman begins to speak again, "Aisha is our trailblazer in Formula 1.”
The iconic lights of Formula one begins to count down as the mechanical ticking echo throughout the grand-stands and the camera goes to shoot the anticipatory lull in the air as spectators hold their breath whilst the engines start up and the last light dims.
“She’s smashing stereotypes and racing towards victory.” The team principal shakes her head, a soft, proud smile playing on her light pink lips.
The team car revs menacingly as the gaggle of drivers manoeuvre their way through turn one of Bahrain.
The Porsche chassis glows between the unmanageable scuffle of the other 18 cars on the track, as both team racers attempt to come out on top in the dangerous pile of engines, the expectant victor of the throng doesn’t appear, the deep blue red bull is yet to emerge. The crowd gasps and cheers as the true victor begins to approach the next turn, speeding down the straight.
The camera catches the proud logo on the side of the car, “Porsche” and on the back, as the DRS begins to activate, the opened flap reveals, “Patel”.
“I just hope people are ready to see her in action. Because she isn’t stopping anytime soon" She stares into the camera as her name appears on screen, a small box enveloping the words, “Katherine Anderson, Porsche team principal.”
Finally, the rumoured driver comes into the scene, walking up to the stool as the camera drags up her slack clad legs, the cream material swishes by her ankles along with the golden payaal that jingles with each step of her stiletto heels against the floor. Her torso is revealed slowly, a tight top hugs her bust whilst the printed Porsche logo morphs against the curves of her chest. The varied tennis barcelets and charmed jewellery around her wrist titillate together as she takes a seat on the chair, and her face is revealed.
She squints her eyes and brings a manicured hand up to push away the straightened hair from her lips, her mouth purses as the unintelligible voice of the producer talks to her, whilst her eyelashes flutter and she hums in agreement.
“So, I just talk?” She asks, pointing a finger at the camera that faces her before blotting the lipstick on her lips. She nods once as the cameraman confirms.
“My name,” She tilts her head as she smiles, perfect, white teeth shining underneath the light, “Is Aisha Patel, and I drive for Porsche F1 Team.”
The camera cuts again, showcasing Aisha on the podium, pushing a large trophy up into the air as her teammate, Pierre cheers and sprays champagne on her stomach from his place on the “2nd” platform. She shakes her head and laughs as her entire head becomes soaked with the bubbly, sweet drink. Multiple identical shots are placed one after the other, of her standing proud and sweaty on the 1st place podium.
“I’ve worked my ass off,” Aisha’s voice over-runs the music, “And I’ll be damned if anything stands in my way.”
She squares her shoulders as she unzips her racing suits and bunches it up at her waist as she stomps over to Max Verstappen, the Dutch man looking equally malicious as his blue eyes roll with annoyance and already red face puffs out intimidatingly.
She pokes a finger into his fire-proof covered chest as she begins to shout, ignoring the worried stares of the crew around her in the Red-Bull garage. Max spits out the long, twirling straw from between his lips and begins to argue back.
Her mouth moves angrily as she goes to snatch the can of branded drink from his tense hands, throwing the sugary drink in his face, thoroughly dousing the shouting man and reducing him to a spluttering mess as she stomps away, flipping off one of the camera’s that eagerly follows her.
The narrator returns, his deep timbre rumbling through the video, “But the road to victory is never easy, as Aisha navigates through rivalries, scandals, and the pressure to perform.”
The scene switches to Aisha rushing out of a hotel in England, the night before Silverstone and the odd, overwhelming flashes of hounding reporters seem to be tuned out of her gaze as Lando runs behind her, grabbing helplessly at her hand whilst tears stream down her flushed face.
Her hair is mused and makeup runs haphazardly across her tan skin, she wretches her wrist out of the man’s grip, shaking her head as her lip wobbles. She covers her eyes before dodging and weaving through the paparazzi, barely able to mumble polite, “excuse me’s” from between erratic sobs, as she unlocks her expensive car and slips into the driver’s seat.
The second shot is of her and Carlos, hand in hand as her shoulders begin to shiver in his hold whilst she adjusts the heavy cardigan that hangs limp from her shoulders. The Spaniard’s face is tough and rocky as his hands comes to embrace her upper arm, cradling her against his side whilst the rest of the drivers begin to flee the racetrack, already tired from the latest qualifying session.
Yet, the papparizzi continue to hound the pair mercilessly, Aisha hides her face as the man beside her stops his firm footsteps and turns to a reporter from a less respectable news channel, the sleezy jounarlist gulps but stands his ground as he pushes his microphone forward. Carlos glances down at the tech with disgust, and just before he opens his mouth, the scene ends, and we’re taken back to Aisha who sits contently in the interview.
“In this world, you must fight for every inch. And I'm ready to fight, no matter the cost.”  She smirks at another camera, her side profile showing off noticeable details over the expanse of her face like the sharp cut of her nose and the splattering of freckles across her cheekbones along with the odd beauty marks spotted above her lip and a few inches from her nose.
The final shot is off Aisha climbing out of the Porsche car, removing her helmet, allowing her hair to flow over her shoulder and down her back as she tilts her head at the camera and leans back against the pale white halo of her car.
She then crooks her finger at the viewers, gesturing for the cameraman to follow her hand as she holds up a singular finger, and points upwards towards the sky.
The shot is then of the of the expansive indiago above, and through the magic of editing, the Porsche logo takes up the screen.
“Get ready to experience the thrill, the passion, and the drama of Formula 1 like never before.” The narrator ends his sentence powerfully as the crescendo of the song reaches its peak.
“This is 'Formula for Love'.” Aisha ends the trailer, waving at the camera before the video is overtaken with black once again.
The title card appears, “Formula for love – A netflix original series”.
As the words disappear, a shot of Aisha’s car speeding off into the distance after which a mechanical, “Streaming soon, only on Netflix.” ends the trailer.
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Aisha sighed, tapping her thighs as the filming concluded and many on-set employees rushed to her side, patting at her face along with offering her a can of thumbs up, the condensation runs down the metallic container and onto her fingers.
“Thank you, guys so much,” Aisha sipped at the straw protruding from the can in her hand before smiling at the people who merely stared at her, already putting away their various tools. A compact snapped shut, a damp towel thrown over a shoulder and a camera cover flipped closed.
Aisha sucked in a breath, flicking her eyes over the workers before looking over at Kate, who was signing a paper handed to her on a writing board.
She chuckled at Aisha’s worried expression and the silence that hung in the air, “It’s okay,” she assured the driver, who looked relieved as the people recovered and retreated away from the filming set, going back to their stations.
“They aren’t very used to people thanking them.” Kate shrugged, “They reacted like that to me as well,”
“Oh, thank God,” She patted her chest as she waved at the director, who smiled back and showed her a happy thumbs up, “This is all so new to me.” Aisha tugged at her hair as Kate pulled up her phone and scrolled through her calendar.
“Don’t worry too much about its Aisha, you’ll get there.” She rubbed the nervous driver’s arm and hissed when her phone vibrated, “I have to go, so much to get done before our first season,” Kate shook her head, wishing Aisha goodbye as she walked out of the trailer and out towards their still concealed garage.
Aisha hummed distractedly, before realising she had no idea what to do once Kate had walked away, “Wait!” But the team principal had already left, “Damn it,” She bit her nail once, handing off her empty can and plucking out her phone from her pocket.
“Oh, there you are.” A media manager bounded up to Aisha, surprising the woman as she jumped and whipped her head around to the approaching worker, “The driver’s briefing is about to begin,”
The man waved a hand at his face before pinching his Porsche x Adidas apparel between his fingers and forcing air between the material and his chest. He was likely middle aged, and sported dark brown hair with peppery roots and salted strands that peeked out from between the chocolatey curls.
He showed her his F1 team ID and stopped fanning himself to usher her with his hand.
“Shit- okay,” Aisha stuffed her phone away, following him out of Netflix filming trailer, out to the dark murky sky above the paddock, towards another building.
The office was tall and white, covered with floor to ceiling windows that were shielded with a layer of reflective film, “Oh God.” Aisha murmured beneath her breath as she took a few calming breaths, already forgetting to trail behind the man who was staring at her impatiently whilst holding the door open, watching as she stared at the building by straining her neck upwards.
She prepared herself, flapping her hands around slightly and jolting when the manager cleared his throat.
“Please hurry Miss. Patel. It won’t look good if you’re late.”
“I know, I know.” Aisha repeated, assuring the increasingly nervous man who walked up to her.
“It will be okay,” He laid a hesitant hand on her shoulder, taking an exemplary deep breath for her to copy. He continued when she did, “I’m Harry, sorry for not introducing myself, and I will be in charge of all media at Porsche.”
“Okay?” Aisha shook her head a few times to clear her mind, “Meaning?”
Harry chuckled and hung his head, “Meaning. That I’ll be with you in there. You won’t be alone.” He pointed a finger at himself, “See, you already have a familiar face to look for,” His slightly aged face wrinkled happily when Aisha smiled at him and relaxed visibly beneath his comforting hold.
“Thank you, Harry,” She huffed and stood straighter, “Let’s do this.”
Her heels clicked beneath her confident steps as she thanked the man who held the door open for her and Harry, who walked contently behind her.
Aisha craned her head around the bend, following the acrylic signs that read, “Driver briefing – Conference room 1.” She adjusted her shirt, feeling, for the first time in forever, conscience of her clothing and slipped a thumb beneath the waistband of her slacks to adjust them slightly.
“Let’s do this,” She pushed at the milky white door, steeling her face with a bored, neutral expression just as her name was called out, most likely for rollcall.
But, Aisha stopped in her tracks, the door barely nudged open when a flurry of deep chuckles and whispers erupted at the sound of her name.
“Seriously? Is this what fans are doing now?” The speaker rolled his “r’s” whilst shaking his head.
“How much do you think that cost them?” An oddly familiar British voice mumbled whilst crossing his arms and nudging the man next to him.
And one of them groaned and slapped his thigh once, complaining about “-needing better media stunts.”
Aisha scoffed quietly, so these were some of her heroes? Assuming that a woman could never possibly be selected to race, instead she was an obsessive fan who had shrines for each of the men stashed in her closet?
She pushed open the door, causing a few drivers to rustle and shift in their seats and turn minutely towards the sound of the door hinges, opening and closing.
Aisha walked forward and planted a hand on her hip, leaning onto one leg as each of the men looked towards her with annoyed expressions.
“I’m sorry, fans aren’t allowed here.” A French man, dressed in glaring red began to stand up, nodding discreetly at the security men flanked at either side of the doors- who glanced at each other hesitantly and barely moved at his guidance, obviously recognising her, “How did you even get in?”
“Ridiculous what they’ll do for an autograph,” Another one stood, and stared at her thunderously, his Dutch accent causing him to lisp his angry words, “All right, time to go.” He was the first to directly address the security, “Guys, get her out.”
Aisha held up her hand, between her fingers a prestigious card stood proud, the F1 logo bedazzled in gold foil, shimmered beneath the yellow lights, she glanced over her shoulder at the burly, guards who relaxed at her identification.
“Aisha Patel?” She looked to the FIA officer who stared at her, amused with her entrance before ticking off her name, “Porsche F1 driver.” She announced her title, smirking with slight arrogance at the gob-smacked expression on both the French and Dutch men, both of whom flushed an embarrassed red and muttered apologies whilst returning to their seats, next to both of their teammates.
“I’m here for the briefing?” Aisha prompted the officer, before smiling at the rest of her fellow drivers, most of them attempting to suppress their cackles at the other two’s mistake.
“Yes, of course Miss Patel,” The man greeted her, gesturing to an empty seat next to Pierre who smirked at Aisha.
She began to walk down the walkway between the sets of chairs filled by F1 team personnel and racers, waving at a few of the managers from other teams who knew of her position and staring darkly at some drivers who looked her up and down with curiosity.
“Sorry for being late, I was busy paying of my debt. Do you know how much it costs to get your name on the register?” She leaned forward on her crossed knees, looking down the row with a sarcastic expression. The ones who did dare to meet her eyes mumbled in agreement and slumped against their seats.
“Fuck-“The driver who made the comment doubled over, hiding his freckle covered face in his hands, causing his bright orange athleisure jacket to stretch prompting his teammate to chuckle whilst patting his back.
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honourary tags [for special pookies] : @disneyprincemuke, @weekendlusting, @woozarts, @mellowarcadefun, @paintedbypoetry, @33-81, @kazuha-pista-badam
A/N : And that's that, the first ever episode [trailer really] of this series is done and dusted. As always please show some love to this tinker-bell minded writer and remember to comment and reblog <33
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