#and thats aboht it for now ?

[riiviir]

hey guys so I just started reading Flatland by Edwin A. Abbott and OMG AHSBNSBSBSNSNBSHZHSHDBFHGGHFHGRJ2KSHSBSNSK AAAAAAAAAAAAAAA I LOVE THINKING ABOUT THE RELATIVITY BETWEEN DIMENSIONS!!!!!!

[honestmouse20]

Once again smfs knows me so much better than I know myself. I can write it better than you ever felt it. Gonna give my therapist homework to listen to this bc jfc

[imabiscuitinthousandworlds]

Having the chours of sorts/the one thing you'll clearly understand even if listening for the first time ever be "does anybody care" and then naming the song "The Answer Is Still No" is such a powermove and nothing and nobody will ever come close to No Use For A Name on that one. especially with that opening line as well

[chiiyuuvv]

xikers reaction to you crying?

can I be your 🌵 anon? Cuz I will be requesting A LOT. And not only requesting (maybe)

• PAIRING — bf!xikers x gn reader

• GENRE — fluff, hurt comfort :D

• WORD COUNT — 662

• AUTHOR'S NOTE — first time ever having a 🌵 anon.. or any anon in general.. BUT WELCOMEEE OH EM GEEE also also also we are SO close to 200 followers hehehehe

• TAGLIST — @lil-elle , @hyunukitty , @cake1box

MASTERLIST! – JOIN THE TAGLIST!

MINJAE ☆

He wants to say in touch your feelings, so he apologizes if hes asking too much questions

Wants to find the problem, and if you give him a minute he'll think of solutions

You're stressed out about a test? He'll help you. You think you're overweight? He'll exercise with you

And always compliments and kisses you

With big hugs too!! ♡

JUNMIN ☆

He's usually great with words.. but hes drawn a blank

And he usually doesnt do too much skinship, you're usually the one to start it.. but now you find yourself in his arms

Doesnt say much, just lets you cry into his shoulder, rubbing your back as his chin is resting on your head, a frown on his face

Runs you a bath when youre done crying

And he'd love to wash you, but if you need space hes making dinner ♡

SUMIN ☆

Tells you not everything is going to be okay and youre allowed to feel sad

Lets you rant to him, would never interrupt you

Not very touchy, but if you have a hard time getting your words out he will squeeze your hand

Tries his best to relate with whatevers bothering you, to show you that youre not alone

And finds various coping skills if you ever feel that way again ♡

JINSIK ☆

Does everything and anything to make you feel better

Want cuddles? Hes right here. Want some candy thats not good for you? Hes right here

You dont want tickles? Hes giving them to you anyway 🥰

Will tickle you until you're on the floor, tears rolling down your cheeks (OF LAUGHTER!!) and you're begging him to stop

Then he'd cover your face with kissesss 🥰 ♡

HYUNWOO ☆

Thinks he'd be annoying if he talks, so hes silent

But he realizes that staying in silence isnt always the best way to go aboht things

So hes curled up beside you, running his hands through your hair as he whispers some words of encouragement in your ear

Kisses your neck and cheek

And rests your head on his chest, so he can engulf you in a hug ♡

JUNGHOON ☆

Thing this is already established, but he wouldnt say much

Because actions mean more than words‼

Starts annoying you kinda, but its more so making you giggle

Poking your cheek with his blank face of his

Doing his goat scream thing to make you laugh even more ♡

SEEUN ☆

Tries to joke around to lighten the mood

But then he feels like hes not taking your feelings seriously..

So he's quiet

Lets you rant and nods his head ever so often, so you think hes bored and a stop. But he quickly changes your mind, sitting you down on his lap

Will defo contact his hyungs for advice ♡

YUJUN ☆

Pries your hands from your face, whispering a "what's wrong."

Very quiet and patient, sitting down with you as you ramble about whatevers in your head

"Well maybe.." suggests things to do to take your mind off of it

Squeezes your hand to let you know he's there

And although hes not saying it out loud, theres sadness in his eyes. He just wants his baby to feel better :( ♡

HUNTER ☆

Sits you down and has a serious conversation with you

But although he wants you to talk it out, he wont force you

Hugging you and rubbing your back for comfort

Long slow kisses, telling you everything's gonna be alright

And if you need space he'd leave in a heartbeat ♡

YECHAN ☆

Disappears then shows up with a bouquet of flowers 20 minutes later

Hes not to sure what to say, so he'll just wrap you in a hug

Tries to make you a meal but after struggling he'd make some instant ramen

And just feels so bad because you're sad and what does he do? Make noodles?? He's the worse boyfriend ever

But you enjoy the meal. Your favorite flavor, toppings, drinks.. you're not able to tell him in words so you just kiss him ♡

[bropunzeling]

matthew/quinn :)

gosh what an opportunity to indulge in Sneaking Around, a vibe i so rarely indulge in!!!! i think the most intriguing aspect of the ship is how it isn't necessarily a triangle but brady is still the third point. even if there isn't any quinn pining for brady feelings (though....... i love some unrequited pining feelings!!!!) there's still the part where like, at first quinn's relationship with brady and matthew's relationship with brady are both more important to them than their relationship to each other -- and then navigating how that shifts and changes the longer they see each other.

if i were to write this i think it would definitely start as some sort of casual hook up situation beginning around brady's engagement (maybe quinn WAS pining and now he has reached the "time to put these feelings aside and never speak of them" moment and thats hard and hurts but matthew's hot and here and won't make quinn talk aboht any of it out loud). and that carries on through the bachelor party and the wedding and it's all having some fun until like, it's been two years, and they keep making an effort, and maybe it isn't just having some fun. and maybe quinn is steeling himself to ask matthew that (it's not like they've really talked about it!!) when THAT is when brady finds out (perhaps walking in on them at four nations. rip). so you have the messy guilt and refusal to be embarrassed and negotiating having something that might be equal to (or bigger than) how you relate to brady and also quinn still doesn't actually know if matthew wants to do this for real or if he's digging his heels in bc brady found out (perhaps a bit of both. but it's more for real than quinn realized.)

[ask-mithrun]

... you see it now, dont you..?

....how foolish you are.

Th— the… the goat. The goat… talked to you?..!

Kabru—what did it do…? What it tempt you with? What… what is your desire…?

Did you—no..no you… can’t .. but—

- @ask-mithrun

Mithrun — Mithrun, breathe. It's okay. You know me, I'm okay. Remember, you said it yourself; there's nothing to worry about. It's said maybe two things to me maximum, I didn't and I wouldn't. You know that.

Kabru takes a breath himself.

I — okay. Well.

I'm not going to keep this from you, you at the least deserve to know - It's .... trying to tempt me with my birth mother, with speaking to her again. I know any version of her that it likely presents me with isn't ... her ... I can't — I can't figure out a logical way that it would ... work like that. At - at all. And - and I do want to speak to her. I knew I did, but it's an impossible thing so I hadn't really thought about it much.

[oscconfessions]

alr sooooo erm

on the topic of animated inanimate battle (AIB) i wanna talk about oodle x tivo (no idea what their ship name is)

now now now this is not gonna be neg cuz i really like the ship and all but i wanna know if its technically proship or not

on oodle's wiki page it says that tivo was (possibly) made by oodle but on tivo's wiki page it says that someone named simon did, so im a little confused on why how

aaand about the green triangle on tivo's back thats also the same shade as oodle

i really wanna know what yall think cuz i really like the ship and and errrmmrrrmrbdv ive been thinking aboht it for 4 hours straight while i was trying to sleep

.

[violntfemme]

urrrhhhhhvggggg i try not to make vent posts a whole ton but alas, ya girl is not doing so hot

tw// sh😁

guys do not do what i did and like. purposely trigger yourself with your own sh from a year ago because oh my god in. its. i feel so absolutely fake my scars were so much worse last year and now theyre just gone and i thought i was fully recovered its bren a year and. and im still crying over it and i thought i was done crying over it. I thought i was done crying over literal scars and i was. i mean i thought i was exaggerating when i said the closrr i get to the date ill br one year clean its getting worse and. nope! no, no that checks out!!

Its all my fault i got triggered in the first placr too. I knew what i had in my eyes only wnd i knew that checking it would only make me spiral and here i am just. crying over it. its sending me back to last year where its i just its only oj my hod i csnt be doing this again i really csnt be doingthis again ive bren doing so well and then. and i dont want to i really dont but im still tjinking about it and im still telling myself i want to but i dont i never did i always wanted to say ive been 1 year clean but i dont think ill rver even be able to make it to that point if i keeo self sabotaging like this. i mean t barely even counts ive basically just replaced cvtting with eevry other unhealthy coping mechanism under the sun but i should be better than this i shouldnt rven be thinking sbout it i shouldnt even be thinking that i can go back i shoulfny be in this situation at all and if it werent for me i wouldnt even be in this situation in the first placr ebcause i dont know how to keep myself away from tjings that i really need to stay away from

i really shouldnt be caught ip on this but its. i was. i was thinking aboht whag would happen if i would look back on photots earlier and and i knew i wouldnt be okay with it i knew i would snap the moment i did and wow its almost like forced recov only made me feel guilty for it and ohmygod kill me now i should be better than this i should be better than thjs ive had crisis called so many times ive been threatened by my parents for this so many times im worrying eveyrone around me and im only getting worse and everyone has to wastch me spiral but they cant do anything because im jsut too fucking oblivious to my own issues but im just too scared to readh out to anyone because how am i gonna say that i triggered myself without sounding like i planend this i didnt i swear i didnt plan to break down over this i promise i didnt mean for it i didnt want to cry over it i dont want to think abiut it anf i dont want to go back ive been doing sowell i swear im just worrying rveryone i dont want everyone to start checking in on mr in the morning just to make sure im still alive i font want people to messagr me in the middle of the night to make sure im not dead im so sorry ik so sorry

im just as tired as i was last year the only difference is thst im not actively trying to kill myself over it even if i really. wiuld like to thats besides the point the point is im just as weak of a girl as i was last year but last year i could at least hanfle pain now i just fucking snap whenever someone raises their voice or whenever i get. acut i break down and whenever i get hurt it only reminds me of the past 4 years that ive spent doing nothing but putting myself through mental hell and im realizing tbat ill never get begger i cant get better ive bren trying and i just csnt

i cant do it ive tried ive been trying why am i not getting anywhere why am i still stuck on the thought of sh i shouldnt be thinking about it i shouldnt miss it i shouldnt be upset that my scars are faded i shouldnt still have the ideas and images swirling aorund in my head because theyre always there and ill always have these scars and ill always br fucked ip and i wont ever be able to fix it ive had so many people worry and theyre worrying and worrying and i just dont care im such a horrible person i

i shiuldvr stopped for my parents they had to skin check me dsily for almodt a year straight and here i am just fucking itching to go grab something, literally anything just to go back and in so stupid im so stupid i did this to myself and im still being a pussy about it i shouldnt be thinming abiut it i shouldnt be crying over it whats wrong withme

[wackymaci]

✨Blog rules: pwease no rebwoggy (anything, not just this post!)✨

No I can’t make all these posts unrebloggable cause otherwise how would I re-reblog myself eight thousand times. duhhhh— ANYWAY—

“ooo april wtf is this” hello trusted Friends and Confidants WELL some of you already know what I’ve been doing in my spare time but for those of you who had taken part in the Twitter exodus ahem aHEM,

THATS RIGHT IM… OHHHH MY GOD IM MAKING AN ELYSIUM WIKI???? like an actual wiki website which is just. insane honestly that I’m just Allowed To Do This for Some Reason—

I have not released the link to anyone just yet (except for fenixe obviously) and I have not said a word about this on my actual tumblr nor my actual public twitter or my growing public Instagram - I want to make an actual formal announcement If And When this IS more completed bc on top of coding one billion things I also have. oh god so much to write.

I’ve started with the Maci page bc i figured it would be a good litmus to see how committed I actually wanted to be with this and I have… uhh STILLLLL been working on the Maci page so to be honest I don’t know if I’m actually completely on board with doing this whole thing as all of the 80 interlinked articles that’s gonna be involved BUT. to be more honest I’m also already kind of obsessed and so yknow what like. it’s gonna fuckin happen

probably

EDIT, MARCH’24: or maybe not!?? who knows!!! By now this blog has ALSO turned into a haven to stack up some CANON CONVOS which I usually don’t EVER share, so at least this top secret space is being used for ssss…… something. LISTEN ITS JUST VIBES IN HERE—

anyway with twitter once again disintegrating like I said on Main Blog im gonna need Somewhere to put all my sneaky gushing about this project specifically cause I can’t talk about it anywhere else + general other sneaky gushing and so you know what yeah. priv tumblr IS the way to go.

I’ll prob crosspost some of the nonsense I’ve been rambling aboht on twt re ; this for the past two weeks in a bit but for nowwww here’s YOUR SUPER SECRET REVEAL FOR THIS BLOG and now I’m busyyyyyy………..👀

EDIT to add: all these preview snippets feature a litany of tragic backstories and so uh. trigger warnings for.,,, basically everything. proceed with caution. the entire wiki is doused in one million trigger warnings per page dw 🙃🙃 augh

RELEVANT CONTENT TAGS:

preview snippets: paragraphs snipped from wiki WIP, subject to be changed before publication but as sneak previews on here!

canon convos: real snips from the Elysiumverse SOURCE MATERIAL scripty rp’verse taken from my archives! These can ONLY be glimpsed here!

[starpros-sunshine]

My knowledge on culturally significant media is like. The only thing I have going for myself who am I if not the guy that knows fun little references about things...

[dogstarblues]

accomplishments 3/8/24

walked my dog

ran an errand to get my medicine (another black girl told my my hair is beautiful 😭 feeling highly blessed bc i was convinced it was a mess today)

ran an errand to give my dad a belated present

talked to my dad for 2 hours and didnt have a meltdown

ran to dunkin for a drink

ran to the grocery store to pick up a few things

read a book to cross off an item on owned TBR list challenge from The Server - hated it but i read it

sewed in lining partially for my friend's bag that i made

listened to an audiobook that just happens to be on the book bingo challenge sheet i made for myself

listened to Media Club Plus

made breakfast

made dinner

made the snack i posted earlier

filled out interview questions

this was the most ive been out on errands in almost 2 years. maybe 2 full years. the most ive driven my car in almost 2 years. possibly tbe most ive been on my feet. and i feel okay. i still dont want to hope im getting better. im scared this is just feeling okay for now. im scared ill go back to how i was. that i'll regress. im scared that this isnt progress at all that its a fluke. and thats the thing is: my CFS isnt going away. even if im going into remission something could trigger it years down the line and i could get sick again. i have to live my life constantly cautious from now on.

i wanted to do work today but seeing my dad took a lot out of me mentally. we talked about some heavy topics (my mental illness, my chronic illnesses, scratched the surface of my financial trauma that he partially inflicted on me) and like. idk. i dont think my dad knows how crazy i am. he had like an expression of fear??? almost??? when i told him (only slightly!!!) what mania is like and wbhat psychosis is like and that i still get delusions like that time this january i cut myself off from almost everyone for a week because i was convinced i was being shunned by everyone. or that time several years back i was up til 4am tearing apart the apartment and ranting trying to find the source of a smell that didnt exist in the space (burning cinnamon). like im delulu. ive made my peace with it and look at my irrationality with a fondness now. but im delulu. and always will be.

anyway i dont think he ever bothered trying to understand what bipolar disorder and chronic illness was until now, when he retired. idk something changed after his first year of retirement, its like he actually listens to me talk aboht my experiences instead of like reminding me over snd over that my birth parents gave me up and didnt want me and constantly bringing up my childhood instead of talking about my life now. hes less exhausting now is what im saying. still get flashbacks from seeing him tho.

tldr: i djd a lot. idk how to feel abt it. im scared to hope. today was mentally draining.

[bonesandthebees]

BEE IM SO EXCITED LETS GO OKAY GLASS FIRST WOOO THIS IS ALSO GREAT BECAUSE IM GETTING MY HAIR DONE RN AND NEEDED SOMETHING TO DO

ahhh thats the palace hes there in there in that yep

he might as well be dead i mean the pythia that he once knew is dead

flashback wooooo

your descriptions are alwasy SOOOOO

GOOD LIKE IDK THEY JUST AHHHHH

omg theyre at nikis right probably

“my pythia” why dont you go crawl up you own a— anyways. this is a pg zone (i just dont curse)

i want to slap him around a bit, just a tiny bit just like hang him from the ceiling and wack him like he’s a piñata at a five year olds birthday

THEY ARE AT NIKIS

TATTOO

HES DOING IT ISIRJSF ANDOQLFNWIF

tommy is so baby brother

NOTNIN THE PHYSICAL SENSE *spins around very quickly like a tornado*

WHO HE IS OH MY GOD BEE

why is schlatt

i think schlatt would look nice with a black eue it would bring out how much kf a d— anyqays

TAKE THAT SCHLATT

i need more people to draw this tattoo because every singly one is so ahhhhh like i have no clue how this is supposed to look bjt every design peiple make makes sense and i need more im so curious to see how people see

i love the way wilbur thinks i want to take his brain and poke around in it like its so intriguing

also like idk as a person feeling your pulse is always so… intimate? i do it a lot, like just feeling my pulse reminding myself that im human, we all have a pulse. idk its comforting in a way just feeling the way the blood pumps through your body regardless of the world, that youre alive no matter what as long as that blood keeps pumping. like even when everything feels out of place, youre still human.

sorry anyways

anywho thats why hes fiddling with the cuff then hes nervous aboht them seeing

UGH HES SO ANNOYING I WANT TO CHUCK HIM ONTO LIKE I-5 OR SOMETHING

im gonna send a prayer your way schlatt.

GO WILBUR GO

god hes so idk his brain man and the way you write and god i love this fic so much

WHY DOESNT IT FEEL LIKE MINE AHEOHEIFJWO SO WOROWKK OK DA P WAS HEQID

im cool and chill

the vessel.

yep.

cool.

thats cool.

HES WILBUR

i just like god this fic man

ah yes tommys tattoo

just saying on… july 28th i said it was from wilburs murder attempt!! im so smart sometimes

HE DOENST WANT TO BE EMPTY AGAIN WHAT RHE FUEFUVJ

anyways im so normal aboht this fic

oh me too wil lets fist bump over our shared fear of failure and disappointment

me when he realizes that they werent empty he jsut didnt know they were allowed to not be empty

THEYRW FMAKILTLY OU YK EGOD THEY MEHM

BROTHERISHD OH MY GODHD I LOVE RJEM

BOOM AH

GUNSHOTS AH

HIS UBER DRIVER IS HERE YAY!!!!

TOMMY!!!!!!

HIS HROTHERUWIDHS IM NEVER GOING TO HE OKAY WHEN THEY SAY THAT

i loveddddd the way you formatted it it was super neat and idk im just a sucker for interesting formats of swifching between past and present and like idk yeah it was cool

AND NOW OFF TO READ THE ROYALTY AU!!!

- 🪿

hi goose this is a few days old now but finally getting around to answering this!

aaa thank you I'm so glad you like my descriptions :D it was definitely a bit tough getting back into the glass writing groove with the style I use for the descriptions and stuff so I'm glad it turned out ok

"my pythia" made my skin crawl to write

YEAHHH TATTOO TIME. every single time I see fanart of the tattoo I freak out (/pos) so much because all the interpretations are SO cool. I love seeing what people come up with because I myself have no artistic ability, I can only describe what's in my head through words, so when people are able to actually put that into art form it just makes me so happy

yes exactly that's why I wanted it on his pulse!! I wanted it to sit right over the reminder that he's human! that he has blood pumping through his veins! everyone has that blood and that heartbeat and I wanted the tattoo to sit right above that both because of the connection to his heartbeat, but also because it's the place other people can feel your pulse. it's the connection point almost between your pulse and others, if that makes sense.

(random fun fact, I can't feel my own pulse on my wrist. doctors and nurses can't get a pulse from my wrist either. like there have been many times I've gone to the doctor and the nurse has tried to take my pulse and they frown and readjust their hand and then they try the other wrist and no matter what it doesn't work and I'm just sitting there. the only place you can get a pulse off of me besides straight up feeling my heartbeat is on my carotid artery on my throat)

aa thank you I had a lot of fun describing wilbur's thought processes in this chapter, especially with the alternating format

you were RIGHT about the vine tattoo you got it and it was so funny I had to just not say shit but i was like yup, several people have already figured it out :)

HIS UBER DRIVER IS HEREEEEE

aaa I'm so glad you enjoyed!! I had so much fun with the format of this chapter. I plotted it out a bit before my trip, and I specifically wanted to finish ch 25 before my trip because I knew ch 26 was going to be the one I'd most want to write after I got back. I needed a REALLY good exciting chapter to come back to and the alternating format was going to be the way I sucked myself back into the story after being out of that headspace for 3 weeks straight, and it worked. it was just so cinematic in my head y'know? I can perfectly picture the flipping between past and present with like different color grading and lighting and music and all that

[findursoulmateorfindyourself]

its really still a problem. i am reading mark aurel which is all about focusing on urself and pracising kind hearted not comparing urself too others not envy and so on and then this stunning stunning stunning young woman comes, dark hair teint skin beuatifuk mouth beuatofuk smile suoer young oerfect akin very beautifuk body but akk in a very subtle way. she smiles to me i smile bavk i admire her but and this sistrubs me i still envy her. i wish i had her beauty and her eaziness soorit the effortless sex appeal. next to her i feek old, wasted and kind of trying to be ridicule. i need to wear rhose toght things to he recognized I need to really ahoe my hody but she is not doing anything kf jt and still glowing. but it ahoukd he omay and i ahoukd not feek bad aboht mysekf just because she js suoer stunning. why am i doing it. its all just to put myself down. but i knkw irs a fact a fact i just oainky should accept and mkve on. be grateguk for the bidy i am in as i an prraching everyday and saying hoe much i love myself now. apparently i am not there yet. hiw can i get over it and just recognize and cherish her beuaty fulk stop. i dont hate her fir being behaitfuk i just wish it coukd be me instead. i think my kifr woukd be so much better if i looked like that but what woukd be better? i know she is a beautifuk kind soul the way she smiles gives jt off. its not like i would be taking this beautiful body and losing a beautiful character bc she clearly has it all…so what am i scared for. the man or woman I like, likes her better fir her beauty and her character? so it be, then it simply means they are a better match. if she is oreferred for something like getting into a club I am not, so it be. it is not my oath to be in this club as it is not my path to be with this person. but then how to jot feel sorry for urself as it all just seems unfair. and i think this is the crucial part. everythingabout us is beautiful if we are doing it with a compass liek mark aurek out of honesty purity and kind hearted ness every little thought ( it is okay to be jealous I am not there yet) but I am really trying. I might bit get into the club, i should say c’est la vie, and might go hoke with a fresh mind crrating something amazing. it has the same value. or does it not? therr is no such thing as objectively speaking thats why POV became such a thing i guess but yes. lets try to oretend objectively which means a lot kf opinions gathered she is getting into the club meeting tons of amazing oeiple and sancing to incredibke music. over girl going home and chilking thwre no ine cates aboht her. but it is also with what aurek says caring about what ithers think and do its espeically the problem!! I inky have my now and here out if my eyes and my heart and it is supposed to be like that. and ofc im thinkinf hundert peopke consider it to he better like this or like that basically this is how democracy works, how can I vakidate my own opinion as much as them 100 if it comes to, it is the same good to be rejected and go hike than be in the club? its the same old same okd question about. which opinion values how can i crrate my value without the measurements of others. i am always coming to this. i sint want peiple to think i am a narcisisit egoman if i dont give a fuck aboht theyre opinions amd weigh mine way higher. it is trucky to maneuver in that mindest without becomung ignorant. but at the same time i dont want to live through grow through prosper thorigh affirmation hell no that aounds like hell. i want to affirm mysekf. it is maybe because ut is the sustainabke way. when we think about rivers and flyids which i cam to visualize when we had a saying about einfluss neglej und beeinflussen which also inckudes the river interesntinfky and aurel is talking alout aboht the stream and i think it is pary of live as blood is streaming through our veines and we need ghe water and the fluids, the circulation is life. bht coming back to the asoect of sustainabikty. listen imagine your own body giving ur own body ur own bacteria ur own blood cells when we tal

lol my paragrpah was maxed oht i do too much bla bla. but yes if we i somt want to go into biologism to much i never want to dsocirmante bodies espeicalky when it comes to genetics we always have to he carefuk to not get into any natuonalism discimnating fucked up shit. but I think my own body loves theri own system the most and it csn get a lot of her own system. its a little bit maybe kets talk about skin its better. my dahrer always refused to wash us too much as babies and in general he as this pladoyer: ur own bidy crrates fat that oeitect the skin, washing it away sith oerfumed shampoo gel to then out chemical body lotion sossnt seem to be an enhancement for the skin seems pretty ligicak to me. I mean everyone has their own bekiefs and ways but I kove to appreciate what my vody creates and what my body does. I know i am talking aboht an abled healthy skin ans i know some peiple just love to smeell like thousand rose leafs. byt i find that metaphor pretty good for also souk stuff. what my own body gives to my body is because it is healthy important disclaimer sensefull and good for me. it pribably matches my needs better than any artificial or natural product which fits affirmation from outside. of course fhe cream snells nice i feek fresh but then, my bidy get used to this crram wnats more of this crram and stips crrating its own fat to protect the skin maybe. I always have to buy this cream and its exterior, it will never last. i need it nee alk the time

i need rhat affirmation it feeks good but it wont last, my own afformation whereby comes naturally fits my needs and it is independent on any outer things. and this is why the value for me of my own affirmation wighs heavier than any of other people. i feel free and i feel good avoht jt but ifc still i am here comoaring mayelf to a maybe 19 year old woman that i wikk never be and never was. and its okay like fhaf but i need ti remind myself and i am disappointed inmyself still that it affects me so much and my head us gilled aitb it instead kf kther thints. but at the same time i lay down write this down and reflect on it so i hope i pray but i also

know that the next time i get inti a situation like that ill feel differently. I see feel hear taste the world thourgh my eyes and I love that I appreciate so many good food so much so many nice music ao many beuatofuk animals buidlings chikdrens families situations ( sometimes i dont of course madness, sexism, racism exploitation hatred and injsutice of the workd) but Its all meant for me. and i need tk accept and allrecate this. trhough my mind baby through my mind and love ur mind, it diesnt mean you think her mind sucks, it is beautifuk for sure, but its her mind her life her feelings hers and its good to see ssomeone havinf it like that its just an insoiratuon and a joy if beuaty and smiles which is for free and contagious( but Its all meant for me. and i need tk accept and allrecate this.

[transsexualhamlet]

do fingon and turgon bite bite bite also faramir

HI

ONE THING ABOHT ME OS THAT I LOVE FINGON VERY MUCH. SAME ABOUT FARAMIR GOD WHAT A GUY. i would marry him fr eowyn was so right hes like if a lesbian was a man. me when i have normal reasonable socially acceptable feelings about men who look like they play dnd and take hikes and can tell u what kind of mushroom that is and how to cook it

fingon is like. i well you see i want to put him in my mouth. hes just trying so damn hard ok he is so forgiving. hes like this is my cringefail cousin maedhros yes he killed 200 people but thats BESIDES the point hes BEEN THROUGH SOME SHIT OK and maedhros is like boy please this is my 530th birthday party we dont need to do this every year

turgon is like?????? what a fucking individual? hey guys sea god says the whole country's gotta get up and move to this place i haven't built yet but it's really pretty in my mind. but like SECRETLY and then theyre just like lol ok? why not? and then he just DOESNT LET ANYONE LEAVE THE DAMN CITY FOR 500 YEARS and then some dude comes like hey. sea god says you gotta leave the city. and now hes like well NOW I DON'T WANNA DO IT! AND EVERYONE DIES. like i don't understand him but i think he's worth studying under a microscope

[elliesglock]

azzi now post the big fuckass bouquet p got you with “🥰💗” THATS ALL WE’RE ASKING FOR

GIRL J POST YOUR FINGER ATP ILL KNOW UR TALKING ABOHT MARRIAGE YOU KNOW IM GOOD LIKE THAT AZZI PLS

[untitledvents]

religious bullshit and hate Sep 18 2024

I DONT CARE WHAT ANYONE ELSE FUCKING SAYS I AM A BAD, BAD FUCKING PERSON. I AM A HORRIBKE PERSON, AND NO ONE LIKES ME, AND NO ONE SHOULD.

I WISH I HAD A FUCKING MOOD DISORDER WITH EXTREME FUCKING SYMPTOMS SO THAT EVERYINE COULD SEE HOW FUCKING INSANE I AM AND LEAVE ME

EVERYTHING has just gone D9WN FUCKING HILL since surgery and its ALL MY FAULT

and its my FAULT BECAUSE IM A BAD FUCKING PERSON

I DONT CAAAAAARE I DONT CARE ABOHT ANYONE I DONT CARE ABOUT YOU I DONT CARE ABOUT ANYONE THAT I PRETEND TO LOVE

and thE ONLY THJNG I FEEL FOR HIM IS PURE FUCKING OBSESSION. I HOPE HE REALIZES HOW FUCKING INSANE I AM AND LEAVES ME AND NEVER EVEN THINKS OF ME AGAIN WHILE I FINALLY WORK UP THE COURAGE TO DO SOME PROPER DAMAGE ON MYSELF SO THAT MY WHOLE FAMILY CAN SEE HOW GODDAMN INSANE I AM AND THROW ME IN A GODDAMNED ASYLUM.

I DONT WANNA BE ALIVE BUT NOOOO I HAVE TO BE BECAUSE SOME DUMBASSES WILL GET SAD AND WHEN THEY GET SAID THEY FUCKING KILL THEMSELVES AND SO ON AND SO FORTH AND EVERYONE FUCKING DIES BECAUSE IM DEAD AND NOW ILL HAVE TO DEAL WITH THEM ALL AS GHOSTS.

I AM A GOD RUNNING A CULT I NEVER STARTED AND THESE IDIOTS WILL ALL DO WHATEVER I FUCKING SAY BECAUSE THEY SEE ME AS A RIGHEOUS GOD WHO CAN DO NO WRONG

BUT I AM STRAIGHT UP NOT A GOOD PERSON. MY LIFE IS SLOWLY SPIRALING DOWN BECAUSE OF MY OWN FAULTS AND I'M THE ONE REFUSING TO OWN UP TO IT

YOUD THINK BEING SELF AWARE WOULD MAKE ME WANNA FIX IT BUT NO I JUST HATE MYSEKF MORE

AND ALL OF THIS BULLSHIT IS FUCKING STUPID IT IS SO STUPID HOW I FEEL THIS WAY IM GONNA LOOK BACK AT ALL OF THIS SHIT THATS MY OWN FAUL AND THING 'GOD SHE'S FUCKING ANNOYING' BECAUSE IM NOT EVEN TRANS I JUST SAY THAT BECAUSE BEING A GIRL IS THE FUCKING WORST AND I HATE WOMEN AND I HATE MYSELF FOR BEING A WOMAN BECAUSE EVERYONE SAYS IM A WOMAN SO THEREFORE I AM ONE

MY ROOM IS A FUCKING MESS AND THRRES NO ONE TO BLAME BUT ME. IM A HATEFUK LITTLE BITCH AND THATS ALL MY PROBLEM. I WANT EVERYONE TO GET THE FUCK AWAY FROM ME AND PITY ME AND WATCH ME LIKE A FUCKED UP DRUNKEN ZOO ANIMAL JUST REPEATEDLY BASHING NY HEAD INTO A WALL WHILE EVERYONE LOOKS AT ME FEELING NOTHING BUT PITY

I DONT RESPECT ANYTHING. NOT RELIGION, NOT THE LGBTQ COMMUNITY, NOT THE PEOPLE IM SUPPOSED TO LOVE, NOT THE PEOPLE WHO LOVE ME, NOT MYSELF, NOT NATURE, NOT THE FAKE GODS THAT WANNA BE SOOO FCPUCKING SPECIAL AND HAVE A FOLLOWING

BECAUSE I AM A GOD AND I HATE IT. I CONTROL PEOPLE'S LIVES WHILE THEY LIVE ON WITHOUT ME AND I HATE IT.

I WISH MY BODY WAS MORE SUITED TO CONTROL EVERYONE SO I COULD FIX EVERYONE TO STOP BEING SO GODDAMNED FUCKING STUPID AND BE PERFECT FOR ME. PERFECT FOR HIM.

I WANT AND NEED THE POWER TO CHANGE THE WORLD FOR HIM BECAUSE THE ONLY FUCKING SAVING GRACE IN THIS BULLSHIT IS THEM MAN I HATE MORE THEN ANYONE ELSE IN THE WORLD

I NEED HIM TO SEE HOW IVE FIXED THIS WORLD SO THAT HE CAN HATE HIMSELF AT MY PERFECTION

AND I KNOW ALL HE'LL FUCKING DO IS SUPPORT ME BECAUSE HE IS A BLIND, IDIOTIC FUCKING FOLLOWER. AND I WANT HIM TO BE MY FOLLOWER, AND I WANT HIM TO BE THE ONLY ONE FUCKING FOLLOWING ME. I CAN REWRITE THE WORLD SO THAT ONLY HE AND I ARE THE ONES IN IT, AND NOBODY ELSE FUCKING MATTERS. GOT IT?????