#me: im so glad i dont have a math class during my senior year! now i dont have to learn anything math-related! | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

parkaiur · 6 years ago

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Perfection - Jihoon

❀ Comedy + fluff + a dash of angst

❀ Word count: 6.2 K

❀Being in love with your best friend sucks when they don’t feel the same about you. Once you think you will be pining over him forever, a new boy moves to your school and happens to share all the same classes as you. You start to become entranced with his cute face and fun personality, soon making you forget about the previous boy, or have you?

❀A/N: switching to first pov to see which i like more lol so dont attack me,,, also im sorry for making these fics so long lsakdjfas idk if ppl like long fics or short fics so some feedback would be nice >.< thank u all for supporting me on my last fic as well ! :D hope u enjoy this one <3

-----

I rode into the school parking lot, rolling my eyes at the loud music playing throughout school. Every Friday morning, the school blared loud music inside and outside the school which I despised. I groaned and parked my car crookedly-- I was a terrible driver.

“Wow, just another Friday morning.” My next door neighbor, Seunghun grumbled while getting out of the car. We had been neighbors ever since we were kids, and once we hit high school, Seunghun had to start driving me places since he was one year older than me. Of course, now that I was older, we took turns.

“I can’t wait to get out of this place.” I groaned while downing my coffee. I could never function without it. Seunghun patted me on the back. “You still have two years kid. Junior year is the suckiest too but at least it’s almost winter break.”

I sighed and tried to ignore the rambunctious teenagers that were screaming and dancing to the music. That was just embarrassing.

“Well, well, well, good morning to you two.” I jumped at the sudden deep voice behind me but my heart jumped when I saw who it was. “Oh, it’s just you.” I joked. Seunghun laughed loudly and poked Hyunsuk teasingly.

“Why do I even bother anymore?” Hyunsuk rolled his eyes playfully while walking next to my side. I felt warm at his close proximity, my face probably turning red as time ticked by. But of course, they were dudes, they didn’t notice.

Seunghun and I had been friends since we were in diapers, but I’d only thought of him as an older brother figure in my life, and he thought of me as a little sister. Hyunsuk had transferred to our high school during my freshman year of high school. Hyunsuk and Seunghun were both in dance club and in the same math class-- they immediately clicked. And somehow we all became best friends that told each other everything.

Except that I had a big fat crush on Hyunsuk.

“School dance tickets are now available at the register! Go get your tickets now!” I saw the president of leadership shout these words through the commons. I tried not to flinch at the volume. Seunghun giggled childishly at my reaction while I pinched his side. “Hey! Don’t hurt me.” He gave me a cute frown which made me resist pinching him again. I knew he could tickle me to death if he wanted to.

Hyunsuk then smirked and hit Seunghun’s shoulder playfully. “Hey, aren’t you taking Hyemi to the dance?” Seunghun’s demeanor immediately changed from confident to shy. Hyunsuk gripped my shoulder to keep him from laughing out loud. I felt empty when he set his hand down to his side once again.

“Shut up, I haven’t even asked her yet.” Hyunsuk and I gasped dramatically at Seunghun’s revelation. “Kim Seunghun, the dance is a few Saturdays from today, how dare you!” I faked being shocked while Hyunsuk played along with me. Seunghun rolled his eyes and kept on walking. He was so done my and Hyunsuk’s antics.

Seunghun then wiggled his eyebrows and punched the other boy on the shoulder. “Enough about me, I heard a little something through the grapevine that Hyunsuk is asking Kyungmi to the winter formal.”

My heart dropped at the news, but I kept a playful smile on my face. I hoped it wasn’t faltering. “Wait, what? Why haven’t I heard about this?” I punched his shoulder while he cringed at the pain.

I took a peak at Hyunsuk’s expression which was cheeky and mysterious. He was never the type to get flustered when it came to girls. The older boy adjusted his jacket and wiggled his eyebrows at the both of us.

“Maybe I am, maybe I’m not.” He said suspiciously while fixing his hair. I felt my hopes getting lower and lower at his statement. Hyunsuk shook his head and slung an arm around my shoulder. I held in my yelp of surprise.

This is normal, friends do this. Don’t make it weird.

“How about you, y/n? Who are you taking to the winter formal? Any boys been lining up at your door?” I snorted and took his arm off of me so that my heart would stop doing little flip flops.

I took a sip of my coffee and shook my head. “Nope, sorry, I’m the one with the boring love life in this circle.” I tried to not let my voice sound disappointed. I felt Seunghun pinch my cheeks. “Aw, y/n, it’s fine, I’m sure someone will ask you soon.”

Most juniors and seniors had dates to the winter formal and if you didn’t, you were basically seen as a loser. I was going to be a loser, but honestly I didn’t care about being one. If I wasn’t going with Hyunsuk, I didn’t want a date at all.

“It’s fine, I don’t mind going alone.” Lie. I didn’t want to go at all. I knew Hyunsuk was going to pluck up the courage to ask Kyungmi and I didn’t want to see that happen. Nor did I want to fifth wheel the two of them.

Hyunsuk pouted and looked over at Seunghun. I was scared the two of them were planning something. “Are you sure? We probably have a few guy friends we could set you up with.” I saw his hopeful expression which broke my heart into tiny pieces and I shook my head. “Seriously, it’s fine, I don’t need one and I don’t want one.” My voice came out harsher than expected which made the two boys freeze. I heard the bell ring, meaning we had to now separate and go to class.

“Truly, I’m not upset about it, just leave it be. I can have fun by myself anyways.” I patted the two of them on the back and scurried to class.

As I plunked down in my seat for history, I released a sigh of relief. Most days I felt normal around the two of them, but whenever they brought up relationships or dating, I tried to avoid it at all costs.

I plugged in my earbuds, getting ready to drone out whatever the teacher was saying. I had already read the chapter for this week so my first period was about to become snooze town.

Before I could turn on my music, I heard a group of girls enter the classroom giggling and laughing about something. I was about to tune them out til I caught a sliver of their conversation.

“No way, he’s going to ask you? Shut up!”

“Yeah, he just texted me and asked me to meet him after school!” I felt my heart drop as I turned and saw Kyungmi gossiping to her friends. Of course, Hyunsuk already decided to act fast since Kyungmi was one of the prettiest girls in the junior class.

“Hyunsuk is asking you? I seriously thought he was dating y/n.” A wave of silence washed over the group until I heard a few chuckles.

I felt anxiety creep into my system and I quickly wanted to turn my attention away from the situation.

“Oh no! They’re just friends. I mean, y/n is a nice girl but...” I heard her whisper the last part. “But I mean, she just isn’t Hyunsuk’s type, you know what I mean?”

I clicked the play button on my playlist, refusing to let tears fall in this dingy high school classroom.

I dosed off in class, feeling the soft voice of Dean drift me to sleep. Suddenly, I felt someone kick my desk, jolting my eyes open. The teacher pulled out my earbuds which irked me to no ends. I hated when anyone touched my earbuds and I felt the urge to smack my teacher’s hands right then and there.

“Ah, glad you could join us miss y/n.” I resisted the urge to roll my eyes when I saw an unfamiliar boy staring at me. He had round eyes that had sort of an edge to them, making him seem mischievous yet innocent. He was wearing a white hoodie and blue jeans which made him look good. I couldn’t help he was eye candy. “This, is our new student Park Jihoon.” He smiled at me and I gave my best smile back, which was my most awkward one.

“Um... cool.” I noted lamely, unaware of the situation. I heard a few giggles throughout the classroom. Mr. Kim kept his anger in.

He cleared his throat and directed my eyes to Jihoon. “I told Jihoon to sit next to the empty desk next to yours, but unfortunately, you were not awake to hear that. Also, mister Jihoon also happens to have the same schedule as yours, so you’ll automatically be his guide for school. Now, onto the second world war.” My jaw dropped as the teacher nonchalantly told me I had to be the guide for Jihoon.

It’s not like I hated the guy or anything, but being a guide for someone at my school means that I had to basically baby sit him. I had to include him in my friend group, talk with him during class, and make him feel welcome essentially. Usually people had to sign up for it, but I never did. I never liked the hassle. But apparently my luck keeps getting worse and worse as the day went on.

“Hey,” I heard the boy next to me whisper. I turned to my right and saw Jihoon looking at me with bright eyes. I felt my heart waver at his cute stare.

“Do you have a pencil I could borrow? I stupidly left mine at home.” He whispered. I nodded and tossed him an extra that he skillfully caught. “Thanks.”

“No problem.” I whispered back. This time, I didn’t plus my earbuds back in.

-----

Class seemed like it ended sooner than usual.

“So have you always gone to this high school?” Jihoon nonchalantly started conversation with me, which made me envious of him. I had never been the type to make friends so easily.

I lowered my head so that he could see my entire face. “Um, yup. Been going to school with basically the same people since elementary school.” His face scrunched up in disgust and I let out a bark of laughter. “Yeah, it’s as horrible as it sounds.”

I noticed lots girls were staring at the new boy who was standing next to me, a nobody with two hot best friends. I tried to not look at the crowd but it was hard.

“So, math next. Love that subject.” He grit his teeth and pretended to look angry. I let out a small chuckle at his childish antics. I couldn’t help my laughter, he was a funny dude. He gave me a small smile in return. “I hate math too, it’s my worst subject.” He nodded but narrowed his eyes at me.

“That’s surprising considering you seemed like you were falling asleep throughout our entire history period.” I gasped at his accusation while he rolled his eyes. “Ok, in my defense, I already read the chapter, I don’t need to pay attention. I’m only there ‘cause our ass of a teacher has attendance as 20% of our total grade.”

Jihoon’s eyes widened while I patted him on the back, a habit I picked up from being around Hyunsuk and Seunghun too often. Jihoon didn’t seem to mine it though. “Yeah, I know, that’s I just sleep in it. He usually doesn’t even care besides today since you showed up.”

Jihoon shrugged and said nothing else as we walked to our next class.

---

The day went by quickly and soon it was nearing the last period of the day.

“Hey, y/n!” I heard Hyunsuk yell my name faintly across the busy hallway. I felt my heart jolt a bit in surprise as I stopped in the hallway. Before I could explain to Jihoon who was yelling my name, he was running at me at full speed.

Hyunsuk quickly embraced me in a hug, twirling me around. “AAAH HYUNSUK, LEMME DOWN!” I shouted into his ear, yet I couldn’t stop myself from laughing. As Hyunsuk set me down, he locked eyes with Jihoon. “Oh, uh, hey, I’m Hyunsuk, you one of y/n’s friends?” Hyunsuk obnoxiously wiggled his eyebrows which made my mood deflate. I hated when he teased me about other boys, even though I knew it wasn’t his fault he didn’t know my feelings.

Jihoon didn’t tease me but instead laughed and shook Hyunsuk’s hands. “Actually she’s my guide, but I’m sure we’ll be close friends by the end of the day.” Jihoon winked in my direction which made my cheeks turn a bright red.

Hyunsuk gasped and slapped me on the shoulder. Suddenly, I felt Hyunsuk pull me closer to him protectively. My blush, that was already bright pink, deepened at the contact. “Gasp, the only people y/n is close with is with me and Seunghun, the tall blonde tree over there.” Jihoon peaked over my shoulder to take a look at Seunghun. “Huh, interesting.” Jihoon mumbled.

I felt Hyunsuk’s arms grow looser around my body which made me sigh in relief. Jihoon raised a brow at me but said nothing to my odd behavior.

“Hyunsuk, over here!” I saw another group of boys calling Hyunsuk over which meant he was leaving me. He gave me a pat on the back and glared at Jihoon before walking away. “I’m watching you boy, no funny business with y/n or else you’ll...” Hyunsuk did the cutting neck motion to which Jihoon responded with raised brows. Hyunsuk ran over to the other guy and molded quickly into the group. He was always really good at fitting in.

I noticed Jihoon was already looking at me when I turned to meet his gaze. “Um, sorry about that, Hyunsuk and Seunghun, the tree, are sort of protective of me. We’ve been friends for a long time now.” I explained to him. Jihoon gave me a soft grin.

He stuffed his hands in his pockets and glanced over to Hyunsuk. “So, does he know that you like him?” I choked on my own spit at his accusation. Wait, what? How did he guess that?

Lie. You have to lie. “Um, what? I do not like Hyunsuk.” I spat out fake laughter and shook my head nervously. Ok I was a terrible liar.

Jihoon gave me the look. That look someone gives you when they’re calling you on your bullshit. I sighed and gave in. “Ok, yes, maybe I do have a tiny crush on him but he doesn’t know, and he shall never know, got it?” I glared at the taller boy as he raised his hands in surrender.

“I’ll never tell another living soul, you’re secret is safe with me.” He pretended to zip his lips and throw away the key, making me chuckle in response.

We walked into our English class together, sitting near the back of the class, where I usually sat.

Jihoon abruptly turned to me. “Ok.. are you always this angsty? You sit at the back of classroom with your hood up and earbuds in in every single class. You act like you don’t know anything but somehow you answer every question a teacher asks you right.” He moved closer to you. He gently whispered in my ear, “and you fall for your best friend and never risk telling him because hmmm you’re probably too scared to get too close to somebody. What’s your story?”

I should be getting upset at his mention of my crush, but all I could focus on was how close he was to me. Snap out of it, y/n, your hormones are just whack because all the guys you see are Seunghun and Hyunsuk. Chill.

I leaned back in my chair, trying to calm my racing heart. His face wasn’t judgmental, but rather curious. “Hm, that’s a loaded question, or questions I guess. I don’t know how to describe my angstyness or where it came from. Also I can’t give you a reason as to why I like who I like and why I choose to hide it besides that it’s embarrassing.” I said the last two words louder and smacked his arm playfully. He laughed and clutched it like he was in pain.

“Ouchhhh,” He whined and held it out to me. “Kiss it and make it feel better.” He jutted out his plump bottom lip to act cute. I gasped and hit his arm again.

He, in return, laughed and pulled his arm away. “See, we’re practically best friends now.” He said softly. I had nothing to say because the teacher started class already but I had to admit, he had a way at making my cold facade warm.

------

It was the end of the day, finally, and Jihoon and I parted our separate ways. We exchanged numbers and he made me promise I wouldn’t drop him after the first day. To be honest, I don’t think I could if I tried.

I walked to the parking lot, my familiar hood up and earbuds in. Even though I expected it, I felt two hands on my shoulder that pushed off of me, making me stop in surprise. I paused my music and took out my earbuds to face an excited Hyunsuk and Seunghun.

“What-”

They both slung an arm around me, which made me greatly suspicious. “So, boy.”

“Dude.”

“Guy.”

“Male.”

“Cute boy.”

“Nice boy.”

“Funny-”

“Oh would you two shut up?” I shoved them away and walked faster to the car. I heard them both laughing, even though their teasing wasn’t that funny. Especially when I still had feelings for Hyunsuk.

“Aw c’mon, it’s just I’ve never seen you with other guys... or other people besides us... willingly... like ever.” Hyunsuk babbled. Seunghun nodded in agreement. “He’s right. You always keep to yourself, I swear you were never going to make friends with anyone besides us your entire high school career.” Seunghun admit. I rolled my eyes and tried to get in my car. But the two stopped me to question me some more.

Suddenly, in the corner of my eye, I saw Jihoon walking out, probably walking to his car as well. Somehow, the boy caught my eye and immediately waved and smiled. I didn’t want to be rude so I obviously reciprocated his actions. As he turned away, Seunghun and Hyunsuk looked at me with wide eyes.

“Woaaahhhh that was the nicest I’ve ever seen you act to someone. Are you sure you’re y/n??” Hyunsuk pressed his hand to my forehead which now burned because of his gentle touch. “Hey, you’re actually warm. Are you getting sick?” He stood closer to me and examined my face. I could tell he was worried because of his furrowed brows.

Before he could think too much into it, I pulled his hand off. “Maybe I’m warm because I’m so angry at you two for being annoying assholes.” I spat and then proceeded to jump into the drivers seat. “Bye, Hyunsuk.” I pulled out of the driveway quickly and ignored Seunghun’s stare.

“Y/n, are you really getting sick? It’s almost Christmas, I don’t want you to miss out on our annual movie marathon.” Seunghun said, concern laced in his voice. Out of the two boys, I was closer to Seunghun. Yes, I loved Hyunsuk as much as I loved Seunghun, but Seunghun and I had a history together. He got me and I got him. It was painful to keep this secret from him, but knowing Seunghun, he would tell Hyunsuk immediately, not to be a prick, but because he would think it was the right thing to do. And I could never let Hyunsuk know how I feel about him. Ever.

I slapped his hand away playfully. “Shut up, it’s like a month to Christmas, I’ll be fine by then even if I am getting sick. And if I am getting sick, it’s because you two had the smart idea to have a water balloon fight in the middle of December.” Seunghun burst into laughter at the memory. I couldn’t help myself chuckle as well.

“You’re right, I take full responsibility along with Hyunsuk. We will cater to your needs if you do get sick.” He pretended to bow and I just shoved him away. Bantering with him like this felt normal, and I liked normal.

-----

Normal did not last long.

I curled up in my bed, reading to read a trilogy I had been looking forward to getting into during the week. I felt my bed vibrate which signaled that I got a text.

As I saw who the text was from, my eyes widened. “What the heck.” I whispered to myself, praying my parents didn’t hear me having a mental breakdown at 11pm. I took a deep breath and opened the text.

‘what’s fun to do around here? i’m dying of boredom x_x’ I chuckled at the use of his self-made emoji. He even texted cute.

I waited a few seconds to not make me seem eager and replied ‘um... read a book?’

He read it. My heart was pounding. ‘... r u joking?’

I tried to conceal my laughter. ‘no... that’s what im doing right now’

‘wow... how sexy’ This time, I couldn’t help the giggles that flew from my mouth. Hopefully my parents were in deep slumber. ‘too strong?’ He texted back quickly.

‘no, you have the same humor as seunghun and hyunsuk tho lol’

‘wow the same humor as your two besties ,, im flattered’

‘is that sarcasm i detect?’

‘no sarcasm here captain’

I chuckled at his cute humor. I couldn’t help but feel like I’ve known this guy for years, yet I just met him yesterday.

Suddenly, I saw those three dots appear. I gulped in anticipation. ‘are you ok?’ he texted randomly. I furrowed my brows in confusion.

‘why wouldnt i be?’

‘... you know...’

‘???’

‘... hyunsuk asked kyungmi to the dance.’ he deadpanned. Somehow, that thought had completely left my mind. And for some odd reason, I didn’t feel all too upset about it anymore.

Fuck, that’s going on? You like Hyunsuk. You should be feeling upset.

‘oh yeah, im fine, ill get over it tbh’

He read my message, but took a little longer to respond. I grew nervous at his next words.

‘can i call you?’

Suddenly, my conscious just flew out the window. “What the... shoot what do I do?” I whispered to myself. It wasn’t like I didn’t want to call him, or that I was weirded out by it, but because I was nervous.

“Fuck it.”

‘sure’ I waited for him to read the text. I heard my phone ring and I immediately picked it up so my parents wouldn’t hear.

“Hi.” He said. His voice was deeper than usual and I heard lots rustling, meaning he was probably in bed.

“Hey.” I replied back lamely. I had never really done the phone call thing. Seunghun lived right next door to me, so if he wanted to talk, then he would just pop over. Hyunsuk would just drive to one of our houses and force us to hang out with him. I guess I’d never experienced a normal high school friendship.

“So...” He trailed off. I held in my laugh. It seemed like everything he said was funny to me. “So...” I trailed off as well.

“What are you wearing right now?” His voice dropped a few octaves, but his tone made me burst out into laughter. I covered my mouth quickly.

“What the fuck, Jihoon??” I whispered hurriedly. I heard him holding in his laughter as well. “Sorry, it was an innocent question.” He joked.

There was a moment of silence for a second. “Polar bear pajamas.” I finally answered.

“I’m wearing my boxers.” I spat out laughter at his truthful response. “What? Guys don’t really sleep in lots of clothes.” I covered my face, trying to not imagine what he looked like.

“You’re an idiot, Jihoon. But, I need to hang up because you’re making me laugh too hard and my parents are in the room next to me.” I said truthfully. I heard him whine over the phone and I couldn’t almost visualize a pout.

“Then why did you agree to call in the first place?” He whined. “Because, I was curious on what you had to say.” I said truthfully.

He paused for a moment, probably trying to soak in my words. “Good point. But, ok, I’ll let you go then so your parents don’t hunt me down for making their daughter laugh.” I bit my lip, hiding a smile at the declaration.

“Goodnight.” He whispered softly.

“Goodnight, Jihoon.” I waited a few moments til I hung up the phone, setting it on my counter.

What am I doing? I like Hyunsuk.

-----

I admit, I was a bit nervous to see Jihoon on Monday again. After our talk on Saturday, I felt like we got closer. I’d never bonded with anyone so fast before, well besides Seunghun and Hyunsuk.

I sat down in our history class and listened to music. I felt a tug on my shoulder, which made my eyes shoot open. I was glad he didn’t tug out my earbuds as most people did. I paused my music and set down my phone.

He was wearing an oversized sweater with dark jeans. His hair was styled today and framed his face nicely. “Hey.” He smiled at me. I noticed how his teeth were perfectly straight, meaning he probably just got his braces off. How cute.

“Hey, you do the history reading?” I started the conversation to show I was friendly. He leaned his backpack against his desk and organized all his things on his desk. He narrowed his eyes at me while I chuckled. “What do you think? I was too busy chatting up pretty girls on the weekend.” For some odd reason, I felt my heart sink at that statement.

He was texting other girls besides me? I crinkled my nose awkwardly, a habit I had when I was uncomfortable.

“For the record, the only girl I texted over the weekend as you." I looked into his eyes and saw his eyes softly gaze into mine. His brown eyes looked so doe-like that I wanted to reach over and kiss his cheeks.

Jihoon then switched gears and gave me a goofy smirk to show he was kidding. My nerves died down at his teasing. “Shut up. I’m sure you tell that to all the girls you text.” I fibbed nervously. Jihoon didn’t take his gaze off me when he shook his head. “Think what you want, y/n, but one day you’ll fall for my charms.” He gave me a shy smile that contradicted his confident words.

"Hyunsuk! Stop, just go to class!” The high pitched voice caught my attention with the name of my best friend. I took a look to the door and saw Kyungmi coming in, with Hyunsuk backhugging her. I felt my heart clench as I saw the two together. I knew they had been somewhat “official” after Hyunsuk asked her to the dance and she accepted, but it still felt weird and upsetting.

I felt my mood deflate when looking at them and it was obvious. “Hey.” I heard a faint whisper to my right. I pulled my strong gaze away from the two lovebirds who were laughing loudly and sharing intimate eye contact. Jihoon had his brows furrowed and concerned looking.

“Yeah?” I whispered. I hated people pitying me and tried to play off my sadness as fatigue. Jihoon didn’t fall for it. Instead of speaking, he took my hand and gave it a light squeeze. Usually I hated when people touched me without my permissions... or at all. But with him, it felt normal.

Hyunsuk barely spared me a glance when he was with Kyungmi although he knew my schedule to a T. Or at least I thought he did. I tried to catch his eye, but it was no use.

“Why do you even like him?” Jihoon mumbled close to my ear, so that no one could hear it. I scoffed at the question. What was there not to like? Hyunsuk is attractive, athletic, a good rapper and dancer, funny, kind...he was basically perfect.

I didn’t realize I said those attributes outloud until Jihoon leaned back in his chair in annoyance. “Well, that’s not what I asked. Why do YOU like him?”

“I just told you.” I spat. Jihoon shook his head slightly and pulled his hood up, copying my style.

“Sure you did.”

I opened my mouth to he meant by that, but before I could say anything, the teacher started spewing fact about the Korean War, making me lose my chance.

-----

A couple weeks had passed and soon the winter formal was right around the corner.

Jihoon and I were chilling in my living room, watching Infinity War as we ate pizza. I had grown close to the boy and found myself hanging out with him more than I hung out with Seunghun and Hyunsuk. Which they complained about constantly, but I couldn’t help if I hated seeing Hyunsuk and Kyungmi or hearing talk about her. It was a constant reminder that I wasn’t his to talk about.

“I feel like Dr. Strange is the most underrated of them all. Like deadass the man saw a gajillion outcomes of the future where they all died... what a traumatic experience.” Jihoon mumbled while stuffing a pizza into his mouth. I nodded in agreement.

“You right, bro. I would legit die if I saw myself die.” Jihoon paused at my dumb statement but just threw a piece of popcorn at me.

By the end of the movie, we were sobbing into our blankets while the boxes of pizza were strewn everywhere. Jihoon grabbed the tissue box and wiped his tears. I felt him dab my tears politely which made me laugh.

“Hey, at least you’re a pretty crier, some of us are less fortunate.” He joked while wiping his tears. He paused the movie so we could compose ourselves and mourn over the multiple losses. I threw my tissue at him. “Shut up, everyone is an ugly crier.”

“Nah, I mean, you’re pretty so that’s why you’re a pretty crier.” I felt him lean closer to me which made me feel nervous. “I’m not even pretty.” I mumbled. Honestly, I didn’t feel like I was stunning but I wasn’t ugly. I could be looked at for more than 5 seconds without pure disgust but it’s not like I was drop dead gorgeous.

“Hm, that’s debatable.” I heard his voice drop into a low whisper and suddenly he was leaning in. My heart beat picked up and goosebumps formed on my arms. Out of instinct, I backed away.

Immediately, I regretted it after seeing the dejected look on his face. “Jihoon, I’m sorry I just.” I sighed in panic. “I just still like Hyunsuk.” I whispered. I saw him turn away in sadness which broke my heart.

I thought we were going to sit in silence the entire time until he turned to me with slight anger in his eyes. “Or so you think.” He mumbled. He turned to stand and walk out. I furrowed my brows in confusion. I shot up from my seat and followed him to the door, thankfully, he didn’t make it too far.

“Woah woah woah, what do you mean by that?” I demanded. “Of course I like Hyunsuk, he’s like...”

Jihoon turned to face me and scoffed. “Let me guess perfect?”

Suddenly, with great timing, my door flew open.

“HO HO HO ! DID SOMEONE NOT INVITE US TO THE PARTY?” Before I could comprehend what was happening, Seunghun ran at me and scooped me into his arms.

Hyunsuk plopped on the other side of Jihoon and slung an arm around him. “Hey, is this your first date or something, sorry to intrude.” Hyunsuk wiggled his eyebrows and nudged Jihoon slightly.

Jihoon forced a smile and shrugged. “Nah man, we’re just friends.” For some reason, I felt my heart deflate at that statement even though I just turned him down a few seconds ago.

Seriously, what’s wrong with me?

Hyunsuk ‘awwed’ at Jihoon and pinched his cheeks to where Jihoon ignored him. Jihoon still stared intensely at me like there wasn’t even anyone around us.

His arms were crossed across his chest and his breathing was heavy.

I assume Seunghun and Hyunsuk realized the situation and took a few steps back. Jihoon finally released some stress in his body and took a few steps to the door.

“Just.. Just call me when you’re ready to be real with your feelings.” Jihoon smoothly slipped on his shoes and opened the door. He gave me one last final look before shutting it softly which matched the shattering of me heart as well.

Seunghun, Hyunsuk, and I stood in silence at the awkwardness that rose from Jihoon’s farewell. I reached up to touch my face, realizing that it was wet with my tears. At the sight of them, I only broke down harder.

“Hey, it’s gonna be-” I stepped away from Hyunsuk’s hug and held out my hands to distance myself.

“Can you guys just go? I don’t wanna see anyone right now.” I felt my voice break on the last note and tried to hold in my tears. At first, I didn’t think they were going to leave, but I felt Seunghun pat my back before hearing the door shut, leaving me alone to deal with my thoughts and insecurities.

------

It was finally the winter formal.

Yay.

It was five pm and the dance started at nine. I wasn’t going though.

I pulled the covers over my head and drowned out my sorrows with silence.

I had thought long and hard about Jihoon’s words, wondering what he meant. I liked Hyunsuk still...

but did I really ?

And what do I feel about Jihoon?

Do I even care about who Hyunsuk dates anymore?

I mean, I was staying inside crying over Jihoon and not even thinking to remember Hyunsuk and Kyungmi. I groaned and hit myself in the face with a pillow.

As I was laying still in my bed, I heard a knock on my door. I raised a brow as my parents knew not to bother me when I was in my room. “Are you decent?”

I held in my eye roll as I recognized the voice. “Define decent.” I snapped back. The door opened, revealing a very dapper looking Seunghun and Hyunsuk. Suddenly I felt like a loser next to them. I buried my face in my pillows again. I heard Hyunsuk chuckle and suddenly the both of them were sitting on my bed, patting my back. “What are you guys doing here?” I mumbled.

“Where else would we be when our best friend is here, dying in her room?” Seunghun knocked my head gently with his fist, something he always did to me when I was a kid. My eyes swelled with tears at their kindness. I really didn’t deserve friends like them.

“Now, since we are here...” Seunghun started.

“Would you tell us what you’ve been hiding for so long? You’ve been acting so distance and out of it... it’s obvious y/n. Just talk to us normally, we’re your best friends. We will understand no matter what.” Hyunsuk finally said. I could tell when he was frustrated as Hyunsuk could never hide his emotions.

“Yeah, what happened to the truth and nothing but the truth y/n?” There was a teasing tone in Seunghun’s words, but I could tell he was upset at me too, which made me feel like a bigger jerk.

Which is why I had to man up and tell them the truth.

“Fine.” I sat up from my bed and closed my eyes. Here goes nothing.

“So, basically, I had a crush on this dude. Who is not important. Anyways, Jihoon found out and I told him to hide it and he said he wouldn’t tell anybody. Long story short, I’m pretty sure Jihoon likes me and I am very, very confused on what I feel about him as I don’t know if I still like this dude. And also, I don’t really know what I like about the dude without what’s on the surface. And I guess I am losing romantic feelings for the dude as well. And with Jihoon, I feel so comfortable around him. Like everything is so natural and yeah I don’t know I hate myself.” I ranted before throwing my face down back on a pillow.

The two boys were silent for a moment until bursting into laughter. I lifted my head in confusion.

They both patted my backs and headed for the door.

“W-what? Where are you guys going?”

Seunghun walked out first and gave me a shrug. As Hyunsuk turned to shut the door, he gave me a knowing smile.

“Y/n, it’s obvious. I think you know what to do.”

Before I got a chance to say anything, Hyunsuk slammed the door in my face.

I sat there in a daze for a few short moments until I came to the realization.

“Fuck I have to go talk to Jihoon.”

-----

I reached for my phone in a rush and texted him.

‘hey um, what r u doing right now?’ I texted off quickly before I lost my confidence.

My hands were shaking in anticipation as I saw him typing.

‘im getting ready to go to dinner before the formal’

I felt my heart drop at his response. I lost my chance... great.

‘why?’ he texted back.

‘just wondering,, have fun at the winter formal’

‘thanks’

A one word response, that meant he wanted the conversation to end. I set down my phone with a deflated ego.

He already had a date. I guess he didn’t like me as much as I thought.

I sunk down in my bed and flopped over in my bed. I wasn’t the girl boys fought for, I was the girl you looked over, the girl you didn’t want.

I laid in silence to wallow in my self pity until I heard my doorbell ring. I groaned, thinking it was Hyunsuk and Seunghun coming to tease me again. I waddled down the stairs with a huge blanket wrapped around my arms. I flung open the door, ready to tell the boys to go away.

I was in great surprise when I saw Jihoon staring back at me instead of the two older boys.

My eyes widened in surprise as he was dressed in normal clothes but I could tell his hair was styled and he put on cologne.

“Hey.” His hands were in his pockets and his stance was really casual.

“Um, h-hi.” I stuttered out. Obviously I was more nervous than him. He gave me one of his familiar smiles. “Can I come in?” I nodded and shuffled out of the way for him to enter my house.

“I thought you were going to the dance.” I whispered, as if he wasn’t real. Humor danced through his eyes as he shrugged.

“Nah, I sort of lied.” I raised my eyes in surprise.

“Um, why would you do that?”

“So I could do this.”

Suddenly, he leaned down and captured my lips with his. The kiss was soft and sweet, yet passionate; it was everything I had imagined Jihoon would kiss like and more. His hands were gentle on the back of my neck and my hands moved to hold the belt loops on his pants.

I heard him sigh as he pulled me closer. I could feel my heart racing faster at the close proximity. When Jihoon pulled away, I felt like I was missing something.

“Hm, just like I imagined. You’re so perfect.” He whispered closely to my ear.

I shook my head shyly before pulling him down for another kiss. He was surprised at my action but melted into it.

“No, you’re the one who’s perfect for me. Not Hyunsuk or anyone else.

Just you.”

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