#and that’s a way simpler explanation than what really happened

[highlandwhackamole]

A Grand(ish) Theory of What the Heck

I love the utterly unhinged, super detailed theories about what's going on in Good Omens, especially in season 2. I hope one or more of them turn out to be true, as some kind of glorious puzzle-box-hidden-code monstrosity. And also I think that there has to be a simpler explanation for things, for the people who are at least Somewhat Normal (tm) about this show. (... I assume such people do exist somewhere...) This is what I have been pondering recently.

The thing that started me thinking about this was this post, containing some promotional materials for season 2 that feature main characters with scenes in their heads. Like this:

Seeing this created a very similar situation in my own head, but with a nice shiny lightbulb.

All the weirdness: the car, the sideburns, the clock, the behavior of the folks of Soho, the vanishing storefront signs. The absence of God. I think this is all because everything we see is in their heads.

I don't mean it's made up. At least not entirely. Memory is already a plot point. Why not explore it on a deeper level? I've read theories emphasizing the minisodes' stories being retold by Aziraphale and Crowley. I think the whole season is like that.

You know that sort of conventional-wisdom-fact-concept that you can only dream faces of people you've seen before (or variations therein), because your brain can't make new faces up? So it just fills in what it thinks is close enough? I think that idea, applied to remembering or recollecting things, could explain so many things that are wonky in this show.

Wonky Things

Crowley parking in an impossible London location? He definitely remembers it was in London, so his brain just stuck some obvious London landmarks in there.

Awkward clattering happening when Crowley throws the stacks of books he's inexplicably carrying around the bookshop? He wouldn't actually throw Aziraphale's books! But he'd like to think he's cool and nonchalant enough to do that, and if he did it would definitely make Some Kind of Noise.

Jim walking toward the bookshop from somewhere mysterious? Maggie and Nina saw him first, and he came from that direction, so he must've walked all that way. They don't know about the elevator in the Donkey.

Aziraphale remembers tartan hills and the Loch Ness monster because he was having a jolly time driving through Scotland, so obviously the scenery must've been whimsical Scottish things.

Nina put the Honolulu roast sign up, so she remembers its presence, but perhaps the occult/ethereal visitors to her shop do not.

Maggie really did text Aziraphale about the rent, but a note through the mail slot is a much more dignified way for a scholarly angel to imagine he received a message.

On the Fallibility of Recall

This season is loaded with unrealistic inclusions. The colors are turned up to 11. Some of the scenes are more caricature than believable interaction. Remembering things never copies or reproduces them with what one might call high fidelity.

Scenes recalled by separate memories will inherently vary. One person's hefty jigger might be another person's dash. Who knows for sure where the sun was that day? You and I might recall an event having different lighting or a different color palette, sort of like viewing something with different lens filters.

According to Neil, Crowley is an unreliable narrator of the story of his Fall. He labels the variations in clock times as a continuity error in a show where Everything Is Meant, but he doesn't say whose continuity error it is. He insists that the Bentley is the same through the whole season; maybe it was the same, but remembered differently. Maybe this is part of why there's more CGI but it's harder to spot.

So What?

Is this all there is to it? I sure hope not. I like my Good Omens with enough layers to put to shame an onion wrapped in a cake and covered in a parfait.

Is this possibly the fancy footwork that's distracting from the real magic trick? I wouldn't put it past Our Gaiman. There are a lot of things one could hide in the narrative of unreliable memory.

Is this going to stop me from rewatching and repondering and remaking theories for the next couple years? Not even at gunpoint.

[anderscim]

✦ a really old minitheory about jax that had been left in my drafts for nearly a year

title is pretty self-explanatory.

// spoilers for the pilot episode of TADC

so, this is actually an old theory that i had created back when the pilot first came out—but i decided that it’s worth sharing now. basically, it summarizes what i think could possibly be a reason behind our favorite rabbitoid’s behavior.

take everything with a grain of salt. (^^)

this might sound like a weird place to start from, but i swear there’s a line of thinking behind it—what could be some of the reasons that a character abstracts?

at the very least, we know for sure that abstraction occurs if a character’s mental state entirely collapses—which could happen for a myriad of reasons. mental breakdown, existential crisis, you name it.

however, the most important effect that comes with abstraction is that they completely lose their sense of identity—which is also shown externally with the abstracted character’s appearance.

this led me to think that a possible reason for abstraction could also play into identity—whether that’s losing it, somehow messing with it one way or another, or, in a crazy scenario, doing something (aka recovering original memories, for example) that would cause them to clash with their current identity. things like that. obviously there’s some very strong theories out there as to what could also be other reasons for abstracting, but for now i’ll stick with the simpler explanations.

okay, but what does this have to do with jax?

basically, i needed to set up the previous context in order to be able to explain a possible reason for jax’s… jacka$$ery. yeah. that works.

as far as i can tell, it looks like he’s essentially being mean to everyone else just for the sake of it. from (allegedly) placing a centipede in ragatha’s room, to constantly bullying gangle, to pretty much every snide comment in general—it seems that he’s completely cemented his role as the “mean guy” of the series. but what if that was his goal?

the reason why i partly discussed identity in the abstraction section is because, to me, it seems like jax is setting up his own identity as the rudest and most chaotic character in the cast as a way to ensure his survival in this digital world for as long as possible. or in other words, this identity of his is something he can consistently fall back onto no matter what happens, which allows him to keep his mental stability a bit better than others. it’s a simple role that was developed only within the context of the digital circus, and he seems completely comfortable with staying in it.

additionally, here are some other circumstances where he could just fall back on his “identity”— - something bad happens to him? sure, let’s call it karma. - in the event that he does something that causes a bit too much destruction? it’s fine, he’s supposed to be the guy that would do something like that anyways. (edit: he did exactly this in episode 2. just my luck. help me.) - hurts someone on accident? wouldn’t be out of the question. maybe even intentionally if the time calls for it.

overall, it feels like his current place as the “rude character” makes it a lot easier for him to stay consistent and keep things less complicated. being nice is difficult and nuanced, you may unintentionally hurt someone by saying the wrong thing—but if you’re already known to harm people one way or another, there’s absolutely no mistakes you can make.

and for jax, it’s a way to keep himself grounded while causing a ton of chaos on the side—which he seems to like doing, so it works. this is pretty much a foolproof method of survival for him; at least, until something happens which he doesn’t expect.

but this is all just speculation. feel free to chime in with some of your own insights (´∀｀*)

———

edit: yes, this is pretty old haha. but i think it still somewhat holds true for episode 2, so i’m posting it for now. would be kinda funny if i was entirely wrong about this though (￣ ￣)

[miraculouslbcnreactions]

One of the problems I had with the online radicalization of Jalil in reunion is how it actually occurs. Jalil is supposedly radicalized by a message board, but it’s provided by alliance and the AI mascot he uses is Lila. So it’s left muddled on what exactly is happening here.

Is there really an internet based opposition to LB and CN? You wouldn’t think it since Paris enlarge is shown to still support them. But the presence of message boards would imply at least some support for monarch even if it’s mostly trolls. Or is alliance fabricating it for Gabriel to upset people in a targeted way? Or is it just Lila with a bunch of alt accounts? It’s really hard for me to tell just how wide spread this is as a problem for Paris considering it’s dropped after this one episode.

I'm also not sure how seriously we're supposed to take the criticism shown in that episode. It feels very much like the sort of BS we get with Su-Han where he points out a legitimate concern but in the most obnoxious, inflammatory way possible so that the audience feels forced to disagree with him. It's terrible writing that isn't very fun to watch. Reminds me of all the awful live-action Disney reboots that try to engage with every critical take anyone has ever had, leading to a lesser story. They would be much better off to just ignore the criticism they don't want to properly address and have fun with the story even if there's an arguable flaw. That's what suspension of disbelief is all about!

You want Paris to support Ladybug and Chat Noir no matter what they do? Cool! That works! Just don't take an episode and introduce the idea that there is actually criticism out there because that makes us start to question things like anon is doing here.

Another great example is the "issue" that Gabriel never uses the butterfly miraculous to heal his wife when it feels like that should be within its power. The show was totally correct to never address that on screen because the butterfly probably should be able to heal her! The reason it can't is because then the show would end. If the writers tried to explain an in-universe reason, then it would be as nonsensical as their explanation of how the rooster works:

Gabriel: There! (to Orikko) You! You can grant me any power I want! (closes the Grimoire and walks toward Orikko) You will give me the power to travel through time! Orikko: No, you're mistaken! Time travel is Fluff's power and I can't grant the power that already belongs to another Kwami! Gabriel: Are you trying to deceive me?? Orikko: (nods) By all means! Read the Grimoire again! (Gabriel reopens the Grimoire.) Sass: Each Kwami represents a concept, and a concept can only exist once in the universe. Xuppu: Too complicated, Sass! Let's use an example to make things simpler. Take Tikki, she is the Kwami of Creation, and creation is creation, and if there's another creation than creation, then it's not "creation", it's "replication"! Gabriel: Then grant me the power to locate Ladybug and Cat Noir's Miraculous! Orikko: Trouble is, that's not a power; that's a wish! Xuppu: For instance, if I asked Santa for a pair of socks, that's a wish. But if I want Santa to grant me the power to knit socks, then it means Santa needs to know how to knit socks in the first place so he can teach me! Gabriel: (groans angrily) Grant me the power to unmask Ladybug and Cat Noir's secret identities! Xuppu: No can do! Orikko: (shoves Xuppu away) I cannot give a power that would disrupt another Kwami's magic. And being able to conceal the person behind the costume, well, that's part of the magic of their Kwami. Gabriel: (enraged) So you're utterly useless!

If all of this is true, then how do the goat and the peacock make things? Isn't that Creation? And how was the butterfly able to make a time travel villain? That's Fluff's power! And how was Gabriel able to offer to make Marinette into a villain who could unmask people via the butterfly? That's going against the miraculous' powers!

The answer is simply that the lore was not thought out in a way that stands up to even the most basic questions. When that's the case, the only way to handle the problem is to just ignore it. Keep your on screen explanations as shallow as your lore. Don't try to add depth that isn't there. Trying to address it just highlights how shitty your world building is.

[agatharkn3ss]

Hi! Maybe I missed it but how do you think: what could have caused "the battle" between Agatha and Rio? I mean besides the fact that Rio could have done something to Nicholas (as we believe), at the beginning she came to Agatha with a specific reason, was doing her job. And it seems that closer to the end of the show we may see the outcome of this battle.

Does she really want to hurt Agatha or it was just, ahem, foreplay? What if her "job" is a hidden mission like serving someone or following the code of The Death if there is one.

Everything is complicated by the fact that there is obviously a blood or some other marital connection between them because of which they cannot kill each other, therefore, she needs Agatha alive but for what purpose?

AGATHARIO AND THEIR FEELINGS

Hi! Sorry it took me ages to respond! I am still mulling over this and I can only provide some thoughts rather than a coherent theory. The more I rewatch the episodes and read Jac's amazing insights, the more I feel that "the battle" was because of Nicholas.

Agatha and Rio have such an amazing chemistry and it is very clear they have long history and are drawn to each other like magnets. So for them to be apart, something big must have happened. I believe Nicholas died in some tragic circumstances and maybe more recent than we think. I am still torn between what could've caused his death. I don't think any complicated Darkhold trade was involved, but rather it was a much simpler cause, which makes it even more painful to Agatha that she couldn't prevent it. So I think maybe he was hit by a car (which would explain Agatha's extreme reaction when Teen was hit in ep.1). There is a theory that maybe Nicholas, being a Blood Witch, had some powers himself. And that he used them when playing with Agatha. Since she couldn't control it, she syphoned his magic and he died. However, generally in Marvel we see that kids don't get their powers until they become teenagers and it sounds like Nicky was a toddler.

Either way, he dies and Rio has to take him because it's her job as Lady Death. Agatha would be pleading with her not to do it and bring him back, but there is nothing that can be done. So Agatha shuts Rio off, blaming her for taking away her son, but really it's just a way to block the truth that it was her own fault. She hates herself but projects it onto Rio. Runs away, acquires Darkhold and hides from Rio - as a revenge but also to hide from the memory of that tragedy. The only thing that she holds on to is Nicky's hair in that locket. And it HAS to be Nicky's hair, because every single time she pays any attention to it, we hear Nicky's theme playing in the background.

The thing is, Nicky was Rio's son too. She is also in pain and had to go through the torture of sending her own son to the underworld. And yet, instead of finding some comfort in each other, Agatha doesn't even give Rio the chance to express or talk through her grief. Even worse, she acts as if Rio did it on purpose, adding even more hurt. And then just disappears (literally ghosting Rio), without any explanation or hope that she will come back. Rio seems to always be so in tune with Agatha - we see the glimpses of it in the spell reality in ep.1. But when Agatha hides, Rio can't even "feel" her any more (similar to when Wanda cried over Vision's body and said "I can't feel you").

So when Rio can finally feel Agatha again and finds her, her first thoughts are probably that of absolute anger for the pain that Agatha's disappearance caused. But then she realises that Agatha is not herself. She's Agnes O'Connor and doesn't even remember Rio. So for Rio to get her revenge or any kind of closure, she needs to bring Agatha out of it. But in this process, as she gets to spend some the time with her, and she realises how much she missed her companion. And that anger slowly starts to give space to yearning.

So when she finally has the change to confront the real Agatha, she has this total mix of emotions - she is oh so angry and hurt, but she has also remembered why she fell in love in the first place. And that's why we get this "playful" fight.

For Agatha, this is the first time she sees Rio since Nicky's. So her initial reaction is "I hate you". She doesn't know what to expect from Rio and probably doesn't realise her pain - maybe she pushed the truth so far away and still believes that Rio taking Nicky away was a clear sign that she didn't care and didn't have a heart (seems like she only realised that during the "she's my scar" confession). So when Agatha chokes her, she means it, because she thinks she's fighting for her life. She knows she can't actually kill Death, but she will do whatever she needs to buy some precious time.

But Rio states "I missed you" and seems to be toying with her. She seems to be enjoying this because she is no longer as angry as she was when she first saw Agatha. She no longer intends to kill her. But she enjoys the physical punishment, taking the rare opportunity that Agatha can actually feel this pain for once and can't just magic it away. It feels like a little victory to be able to humiliate her.

Yet at the end, she probably realises this victory doesn't actually feel like she thought it would. Maybe she even feels sorry to be taking advantage of her when she's not even able to defend herself. And deep down she recognises that this hate and pain all come from the simple fact that she was denied Agatha's company and maybe there is still a chance to repair that.

So she softens her stance, drops the blade, gives in. Agatha is relieved but surprised (there is a tear). She doesn't know what to think about it. When Rio heals her, she doesn't know if this is an act of love or just to mock her.

I think this is why, when they re-join on the Witches Road, we see a completely different dynamic between them. They are confused. But also maybe enough time has passed that they can be near each other again. I think they are exploring it and are probably surprised at how easy it is and how well they still know each other. So when Rio next threatens her in ep.5, we see Agatha reacts differently - she immediately responds with a joke because she knows Rio is not going to hurt her. They enjoy the fact they can flirt and play with their dark humour "death" jokes again.

I think Jac Schaeffer pretty much confirms this in her ep.5 interview when she says "They’re exes, and so it’s that thing of, like, you haven’t seen an ex in a really long time, there is a lot of anger, there’s a lot of resentment, and a lot of heat in a negative way that comes out at the top. But if you are then put in a situation where there is, like, time in, and exposure to, and feelings are still there, and there’s also the muscle memory of that love, then you slip in to those behaviors."

Now. After all that, I still don't know what Rio's end game is. Why she came to find Agatha and warned her about Salem Seven. I think that maybe she has a job to do, one that Agatha won't like, but she's playing a triple agent so that she can protect Agatha in her own way.

They have yet to reconcile and have a proper conversation about Nicky. I think Agatha holds on to the locket because she still has a hope that she can bring him back somehow. Maybe the hair has some sort of spell that still binds Nicky to this world, making him a ghost. But Rio hates ghosts and could not bear it. She knows this would just hurt Nicky even more, so she needs Agatha to destroy the locket. So I don't expect them to just fall back into each others' arms. But I also think it would be highly inconsistent to just have these two battle to the end again.

Hope this makes some sense! I will have to take a break now and reread it after some time...

[apolloslyrics]

What does “courting to be a godspouse mean”? /genq

Hi! Thank you for asking!! This is gonna be a LONG post haha.

To understand courting, I have to explain godspousql itself. Lots of people don't necessarily understand godspousal (and courting), and it means something different for everyone; I'll do my best to explain how I see it, and how I'm practicing it.

Godspousal is a lot "simpler" (and yet very serious) for me than what others might see it. It's an oath that you make to a deity to bind yourself to them for a lifetime (or more!). There are many different forms of spousal (romantic, platonic, familial, devotional). But in its core, it's an oath.

Don't get me wrong- oaths are VERY serious, and should not ever be taken lightly. Minors shouldn't engage in oaths in general, especially not spousal; deities are not going to court a minor for this reason. Remember, it's binding. There isn't really a way to turn back once it happens.

Onto the main part of your question: Courting. So, courting is basically a period of trials. It's a time to figure out if you and the deity you might make an oath to are compatible. Sometimes, during courting, you might find that you and the deity do not work together. That's okay! You can always call off the oath before you make it.

In my practice, I'm "romantically" courting a deity. This isn't necessarily the same as dating. It's actually a lot different. The mortal still has a high amount of respect for the deity. The deity still sees the mortal as just that; a mortal. The difference is that there is an attraction to each other. You will have small disagreements, possibly arguments, but they should never lead to disrespect. Communication is huge in godspousal.

You see many times in mythology that our deities have relationships with mortals. It's sort of like that!

People will also compare godspousal to nuns; after all, they are known as Jesus's wives.

My spouse and I haven't been courting for very long, but it's been wonderful so far (albeit a disagreement here and there). The whole concept of godspousal can be confusing as heck, so if anybody needs clarification or a more in-depth explanation, I'm happy to answer any questions!

Love yall 🫶 your practice is valid!!! Take care of yourselves!

[playertale-au]

[NOTICE] Thank you for the 300+ followers. To celebrate, bits of PLAYER!Tale AU concept( regarding Player) is shared

Reposting because Tumblr decided to post instead of saving it in drafts when I'm not even finished. Love you tumblr!  (╯ᐛ）╯︵ ┻━┻

◇◇◇◇◇

A/N: 

Oh, wow! We actually reach 300+ (as of now 310) followers!

⸜(｡˃ ᵕ ˂ )⸝♡ 

Thank you very much from the bottom of my heart, I’m glad all of you enjoyed the story despite my art not being that good. I actually wanted to draw for 250 followers but I didn’t realised we passed that milestone. 

Anyways! To celebrate, I wanted to share some concepts regarding the Player based on my memories, though sorry if there is like a black blotched in the drawing as that is considered as spoilers.

To start off, I began creating this AU maybe 5/6 years ago, on and off, (re-writing or removing some stuff along the way) I had loads of concept art and drawings back in 2019 but sadly those old arts were, ummm, forcedly deleted after a disagreement with someone I trusted, haha. The pain for a FT user in ibis paint. ｡ﾟ(TヮT)ﾟ

Then 2023, I wanted to move forward. So I decided to give it a shot and start drawing again. I wanted to share my AU (better late than ever),＼＼\(۶•̀ᴗ•́)۶//／／ and also I thought it will help overcome my fear of drawing and start liking to draw again.

Anyway, here we have Player’s design concept (+ explanation):

Version 1:

Player actually does not inhibit Frisk’s body, as they are not trap in the game, instead, they have their own “Avatar” basing on the data and sprites of Frisk and Chara. (The situation is more towards VR? AR? I’m not sure what to call it) The Player has their memories intact.

The story is just Player goofing around in Undertale, until plot happens, but I didn’t really like the idea as I have no clue how to progress the story forward, so the whole story was re-written.

Player mostly hack codes, while Frisk has the Reset/Reload button.

Initially, their eyes didn’t change colour when using abilities. But I wanted to distinguish what and when the abilities are used.

Version 2:

This is where, I decided that the Player actually inhibits Frisk body, though they are not amnesiac. Frisk is like a ghost (narrator?) here. The image above is post-skip version to maybe 1 year trapped in Undertale. This idea was scrap and rewritten due “Chara” ‘s story and I wanted to involved Gaster in the story. (Also, because I didn’t want to draw this version hairstyle anymore, hahaha (  ≧ᗜ≦))

Player has both the hacking and reset/reload abilities.

This version of Player is more uptight and serious.

Version 3:

I think this is like 2nd or 3rd version of the finalise concept. 

Our current Player. I made the hairstyle simpler.

This Player inhibits Frisk body and is amnesiac. The personality shifted so it’s easier for the player to act consistent. This version is more carefree than ver 2, they are similar to ver 1.

First design of the Player (ver 3).

Despite being ver 3, I wanted to keep a bit of the ver 1 and 2 hairstyle but decided not to. Again, I wanted a simpler hairstyle.

This personality is just them being stress and filled with anxiety. A nervous wreck and a crybaby. Cries a lot at the first arc until they pull themselves together. But I didn’t wanna make them cry all throughout the story, if I continued to write them like that, I might ended up smacking Player myself hahaha. I ended up toning down the personality. 

Gaster would have replace Frisk as the ghost (narrator?). But I decided not doing it, because it conflict with the plot. That, and the story would be over much quicker with him around.

Side note: I had to change the relationship between Sans and the Player(hate, confuse, no interaction, chill, idk? etc), a lot of times, but in the end I decided to make him not trust the Player. 

Previously in most iteration, he just hates Player.  I planned to have him to kill the Player the first time they exited the ruins, but decided to go against it as it doesn’t really fit his style. Also, the story would go very differently if he did commit to it. Maybe one day I can make him kill them. In an alternate timeline maybe. ꉂ (´∀｀)ʱªʱªʱª

Extras: Player in different outfits (loosely)based on the other fallen humans in this AU. (+ ruin outfit)

There is a reason, why the Player had worn some of these outfits in chapter 3 and 4. 

Don’t worry, it’s not originally the clothes worn by the other children, Toriel made them. She has spares. (Sorry, to the one that find it creepy, when it was first shown, hahahaha)

And, that’s all for now I am able to share, I wanted to show more, but I’m afraid, that’s already in the spoiler territory. 

Anyways-! Thank you again for the follow, each and every one of you are the best! And I hope you enjoyed the upcoming story! 

[lxmelle]

North and onwards to new beginnings. South towards the past that we once knew.

I think, philosophically, it wasn’t so much South/the past that Gojo chose, but rather, he chose to reunite with Geto, who represented happiness.

Not saying that there were no other reasons (I believe there were which I’ll touch on in a moment), but I think the significance of him having felt left behind, always watching Geto’s soul, his one and only, his only complex, etc. - collectively, it’s undeniable what Gojo drew inspiration from and held close to his heart.

For certain, for Gojo, the time pre-“enlightenment” was also significant. I think this was what many of us theorised over Gojo heading South. It certainly was something I see as him letting go of, especially considering his words to Yuji over how he felt about wanting something else for the world - a world without a singular “the strongest”. A world where people relied on each other and there was less ignorance in the world, which was what was achieved. This was a shared dream between Gojo & Geto.

And for Gojo, I interpret it in a way where he did feel that strength was tied to his identity to some degree, and when he lost that title of “the strongest” in his battle to Sukuna... it seemed like a finale to his character arc where growth and actualising his true congruent self meant relinquishing this as a soul, and a large part of it was realising that he needed Geto to feel satisfied after all - and this further demonstrated that he wasn’t attached to his strength in the end.

And Gojo being Gojo. In his death, his choice of where to go was indicative of what he really wanted. What really fulfilled him. Unrelated to strength.

So… again, I personally think that, more than returning to a time before his powers awoke (pre-“enlightenment” if you wish to call it that), he was drawn to being reunited with Geto, who symbolised a happiness he already knew. Who he formed a complex over having left him.

Geto, who in this theory of mine, had been the one who chose to be in the past - before he felt crushed by what happened with Riko & Kuroi, and lost Gojo to the situation, and saw Haibara suffer his fate. Thus, following Geto, Gojo went South too. The past, to a time they were happiest due to life being simpler back then.

“Happiness” in itself was inseparable from the other, so they inevitably chose each other. There wasn’t just one reason or explanation. So the combination of it led them to opt for the South.

Once again, it’s just a theory. Geto chose South first, drew in the other souls, and Gojo found him. It’s all speculation. And it kinda makes sense to me based on how Gojo seemed to only ever care about 1 person from his past (according to the GIGA book) after all. His only complex, and the relationship chart didn’t seem to emphasise on much else.

Possibly, the others being there might be from Geto’s need more than Gojo’s vision. So that’s why he was surprised Nanami was there? Idk. But it was more Geto’s regret to not have saved Riko or fulfil his promise to her, more than Gojo - who held no regret or anger over her death. But that said, the other theory that they are all symbols of the past & tied to a cherished time before fate was broken - this who’s linked with Okinawa.

Also, I can’t ignore how it was depicted as the opposite to Sukuna. So South was also perhaps in deliberate contrast with Sukuna, who wanted to try choosing something different in the “next life”, he chose North which represented the cycle of rebirth. To try again meant he wanted to seek a new happiness.

Whereas for Gojo and Geto, they already knew the happiness they desired & lost & wanted again. So they chose each other, and that meant it was a time they were together - the past with each other that they already knew as happiness.

[harukapologist]

rambling about Haruka

As an ND person I just hate how Haruka's character is either completely infantilized or reduced to a selfish, evil murderer, when, to me, he is so much more than that.

Especially the latter; I hate when any MILGRAM character is called evil because what's the point of MILGRAM, then? They're all morally grey! That's how they test us. But Haruka in particular because I feel like it comes from a place of ableism, intentional or not.

I'm not sure if I should put TWs, but well I talk about ableism, murder (obviously lol), childhood trauma and well... it's Haruka

Haruka's outburst in the VD and his implication of killing animals (I know it's basically canon but erm... i can explain why I think it's an implication later) (i just finished writing the post and actually i explained why at the bottom of the post but its not a full explanation so lol) are the reasons I see people calling him either evil or childlike, and while I do think that Haruka is stuck in a childlike state in some aspects, this is emotional dysregulation of an ND and/or traumatized person, to me.

The uglier sides of being ND/traumatized, the ones that get heavily stigmatized and seen as intentional or evil; I think this was a display of one of them. And I really wish to see more people focusing on Haruka's disability in the ways it can affect his communication and day-to-day life skills more than "oh, poor baby, he has a disability that makes him feel unwanted" without actually understanding the details of the disability and, well, the reason why it is a disability.

Like, the emotional dysregulation that comes with being autistic, which is my headcanon for him. The hyperempathy and literal thinking that might make him harder to communicate with, and get people frustrated with him more often.

That and being severely neglected; I think neglect is one of the lesser discussed forms of childhood trauma and the fact that Haruka was shown to be neglected as well as abuse really means a lot to me, because I think some people don't quite understand just how much neglect and isolation fucks you up.

All those factors combined are a recipe for an unstable, impulsive, clingy shell of a human, and him getting called evil for that really saddens me. It's important to remember that these MVs are extracted from the prisoners' own memories and thoughts. It comes from their perception of their surroundings, their murders, and their own selves. The manic look that Haruka has on his face for a lot of AKAA, for example. The makeshift shirt he's wearing, as if he's desperately trying to sew himself together into a normal person, the exhausted, frustrated look when he picks up the necklace, it's important to remember that this is how he sees himself. A monster who has lost control of himself. The line "I'll keep killing to be your good boy" was a shock, but the way he meekly apologized to Es at the end of his VD, I really think that shows that he feels guilty, that he wants to convince himself more than anyone that he was a good person, that he was really trying to be one despite how his unlucky life frustrated him to his breaking point.

As for his infantilization, it has already been addressed by many thoughtful members of the fandom and I'm grateful to see that, but I also want to say it myself since god knows I hate being patronized.

It feels very ableist saying he's just "someone stuck in a childlike mindset/age regressor" Yes, and how does age regression as a coping mechanism develop? Usually through prior trauma that makes you "stuck" at said age, and that can present differently. It can be longing and yearning for a simpler time, for an actual happy childhood, or having flashbacks to a traumatic event that happened at a certain age; it is not uncommon for trauma survivors to be "frozen" at the age their trauma took place.

I think both of these are the case for Haruka. Frozen at that moment, but trying to reduce himself to nothing but a little, unaware child to avoid reliving it again, relishing in the innocence and purity of his good younger times (emphasis on purity--Haruka's murder was by strangulation, yet there's a shot in AKAA where he's covered in blood. I know it's after he killed the animals, but he's in the stitched-together outfit here; I think there's more to this MV than just killing the animals. Since this outfit is... not very likely to be worn in reality, did the animal killing happen at all? Even if it did, I think this shot remains an indicator that he sees himself as impure; guilty. I have a LOT to say about the inconsistencies in Haruka's MVs, but I'll save that for later... Anyway, back on topic) It is NOT "having the mental capacity of a child, so being unable to date etc." Haruka has still lived 17 years, maybe even more, since he isn't too interested in remembering his age. How do you treat actual neurodivergent people if this is how you see him?

When I rewatch the MVs, relisten to the VDs, reread the interrogations and timelines, I see no evil, just an incredibly broken, misunderstood person.

[happynowyo]

The triad, part 1

Fandom: House of the Dragon

Pairing: Aemond x Fem!reader, Aegon x Fem!Reader (possible)

Summary: You are Aegon's twin but, despite the fact that you're five minutes older, he's still a main heir. Your ability to have visions is much stronger than Helaena's and that gives you a chance to actually see what happens with Targaryens in the future. That's why you decide to take everything in your hands so you can survive and succeed, especially with some help from your brothers.

Word count: 1,6k

Part 2

Boys will always be boys. Your mother repeated the phrase so often, using it as a simple explanation for all Aegon's and Aemond's behavior, that you remembered it like a mantra. Like a commandment that cannot be broken or challenged. What seemed like a mere excuse for a child began to make sense as you grew older. You float somewhere between worlds all the time, lost in the boundaries of dreams and reality, but still manage to notice the important things around.

People say that everyone's personality traits form in childhood and are also determined by the upbringing and the environment you grew up in. Hardly any of of you had even the slightest chance of becoming someone normal. Usual. You know that this is what Aegon asks of the seven gods on those nights when even alchohol doesn't save him from the bitter realization of his plight. Things would have been so much simpler if all of you had been born into the family of some merchant. But you were destined for something else - something far greater.

Viserys often mentions his dreams. He wants to believe that he has some kind of power that will give him support and way to believe in what is right and what is wrong. Helaena doubts that your father is really capable of seeing anything, but she doesn't question that both of you really have some power to make prophecies. Sometimes the words come to her on their own. They roll around on the tip of her tongue, waiting to slip out at the most inappropriate moment and become the property of a public that will never be able to recognize anything meaningful in them.

But it's quite different with you. More often your visions have a picture and a sound, they are like dreams - so real that you cannot always tell whether you are observing the past or the future or just dreaming something that is never destined to come true. The line is so thin that every time you wake up, you feel a ghostly frustration mixed with hope. Like a flock of goosebumps along your spine, settling in your chest with an unpleasant heavy lump. Sometimes you see things that make you want to clamp your mouth shut to keep you from screaming in genuine horror.

Someone else's memories appear in front of you like an open book, and someone else's sorrows and joys are experienced so acutely and vividly that you feel every death and every birth as your own. On rare nights you actually scream. You crumple the sheets with your thin, icy fingers and scream, staring into the pitch black of the canopy. When your emotions begin to run high, creating a kind of vacuum that squeezes your in space, seeking to crush you completely, you know you must wake up. Your body gives you the command, reminding you that you have a power over this cursed gift.

But trying to get out of the nightmare is like trying to swim out of a swamp. The sticky, murky mire pulls you deeper with every effort. And then you raise your voice some more in a presumptuous attempt to reach out to someone. To get help. To not be alone. To not be caught in the snare of fear for good. Your cry goes through the stone walls of the castle so freely, as if a flimsy piece of wood were a barrier - and Aemond hears your first, since your rooms are the only ones in this wing. He always comes, justifying himself that there is a real reason.

Aemond is attentive to everything and remembers every detail with the pedantry of a bloodhound - Otto jokes that in the future he will have a seat in the Little Council. He responds to his grandfather's offer with the arrogance inherent as every true Targaryen, demanding in advance a position for himself that has not even been offered to him yet. Aemond could compile an impressive dossier on everyone in this castle, but the folder with his oldest sister's name would still be the most voluminous.

He knows every detail about you better than anyone else. You like everything to be on certain places in your room. You like watching the sunset near your dragon. You like being the only one who can say a word and make Aegon listen, at least for a while. Amond thinks there is a certain form of control that you adore, but when he tries to talk to you about it, you only shrugs with words about how everything in life is tied up with control. Somewhere you get it, somewhere you give it away. There's only a few of years difference between you two, but Aemond looks at his sister with pure awe, utterly fascinated by you to the core and so lets any words about your madness pass him by.

When he comes to you at night to cautiously lie down beside you and take your hand unbeknownst to him, muttering aloud who he is and where you are to calm you down, he does not think at all that your mind is at the mercy of some disease, as your mother thinks. He likes to be near you, to see the real you - without that fake, empty smile, that always sticks to your lips as soon as you leave your chamber. He appreciates every moment spent together immensely.

He also likes to listen. To catch the shimmering intonations in your voice as he asks about your dreams. As a child, he marveled at how much you and Helaena can make things up, but later he accepted that some of your visions do have a connection to reality, as Viserys keeps saying. Sometimes, when the weather changes make his scars especially aching and sensitive, Aemond thinks about how he should have listened to you sooner. Maybe then he wouldn't have lost his eye so stupidly.

When he shares his regrets with Heleina, all he gets in return is a soft smile and a light kiss very close to the edge of the lumpy scar. You add to this some wise words to comfort him a bit. "Some things are irreversible. No matter how you run from them, they still happen. You got the dragon, isn't that enough? Other times you wouldn't have had even that." Aemond wants to ask a host of new questions, about the other times, for example, but his skills of observation are enough to catch the mute warning in your eyes.

He twitches the corners of his lips in agreement and doesn't argue, only holds out his hand, waiting for you to touch him first. Alicent sometimes reproaches him for being cold and distant, but it is always different with you, so every tactile contact becomes especially important and can replace hours of heated discussion. Aemond appreciates the boundaries you sets for him - they are much closer than the ones you has for everyone else. It makes him feel truly special.

A warm feeling dances somewhere beneath his ribs, causing him to instinctively smile proudly every time he notices you flinch and seek to escape the unexpected touch of his mother or Aegon. There is never any such thing with him. You doesn't question it but you recognize as well that the bond with him is far stronger than with the others at court. Aegon is your twin, for example, but most of the time both of you can barely be in one room without starting a fight within a few minutes.

Your visions make it difficult for you to keep your boundaries and trace back to when your story with Aemond began. Did you grow attached to him since childhood and fall in love more after he lost an eye in that fight? Or did you have feelings for that grown-up Aemond you'd seen in your dreams since you were twelve so you absorbed his affection and warmth, and then all you had to do was to wait for him to grow into who he was meant to be with your help?

You take this course of events as a natural progression. The attachment grows stronger day by day, and you are increasingly drawn to the fact that Aemond himself reaches out to you and stays close to you even when he has already learned to wear his armor as second skin When he keeps his distance from everyone around him, he becomes increasingly cold and withdrawn. You think that the black hole of the castle consumes him as well, but rejoice when you see that your brother is still capable of affectionate smiles and sincere interest.

It is enough for you to see what Aegon is turning into. You were never close, not even as children. He always preferred to hang around mother or find company among the children of the other lords at court. Aegon liked other people's attention, he was quite easygoing, but even as a child he felt something special about you. He had once said that you had grown-up eyes. Alicent brushed it off with a chuckle, but Aegon remembered and still holds that opinion. Your eyes are empty. Dead. As if you are always somewhere else, remaining around only as a physical shell.

Aegon sees your emptiness even now, when your mother solemnly announces the date of your imminent engagement in the middle of breakfast. He doesn't like it at all. He knows the Targaryens' long tradition of marrying their own sisters, but he is disgusted by the very thought of it. He doesn't see you as a normal girl, so he feels sorry for himself in advance in this planned marriage and goes so deep into these thoughts that he doesn't feel Aemond's sharp, piercing gaze, full of envy that only he alone can understand. Nor does he miss you leaning toward his ear, interjecting your into your mother's idle dreams of a lavish wedding.

— I will love you if you try to do the same for me.

Your whisper pulls Aegon back to reality and acts like ice water, so he blinks twice because he finally sees you. Looking straight at him, not through, as usual. Burning with such determination, as if the fate of all humanity depended on it. Or at least the fate of some Targaryens.

Part 2

[goosewriting]

How about a romantic Donnie x Reader, with purple 1 said by the reader? I was thinking maybe the reader has been trying for quite a while to impress Donnie, doing all kinds of things that often only lead to trouble and to a seemingly annoyed Donnie. What reader doesn't know tho is that he's in love with them too, and just really sucked at showing it?

I see you (rottmnt Donnie x reader)

prompt 1: “All I’ve ever wanted is for you to see me.”

summary: reader wants to impress Donnie, which leads to a confession. 

relationship: Rise!Donnie x GN reader

warnings: i don’t think this counts as angsty right? fluffy ending!

word count: ~660

A/N: not the avatar sounding title lmao sorry if this one is kinda bland,, i couldn’t come up with anything better sdfdsf hope it’s still to your liking :’)

(english is not my first language. constructive criticism and grammar corrections are very appreciated!)

– – – 

Ever since coming to terms with the fact that you were crushing on your best friend, the purple clad turtle, you had set your mind to sweep him off his feet. You tried so hard to impress him, even  going as far as taking online courses on programming and reading several chapters of the book “Engineering for Dummies”. You just really wanted him to notice you and figured that the best way to do that would be to impress him with your newly acquired skills.

Since you would hang out a lot in his lab, you started offering to help on his projects. You had done so before, but suddenly you were able to somewhat follow his explanations and contribute your thoughts on the topic, which was met with a raised eyebrow on Donnie’s part. You couldn’t tell if he was intrigued or felt like you were overstepping a line of sorts.

The very few times he had agreed in the past to have you help out was to mainly pass him tools. But now you were suddenly welding one of the simpler circuits on his project. Donnie stopped working for a second and you could feel his gaze on you, still unable to read him, which got you self-conscious and you ended up burning a wire, making the whole thing unusable. You gasped in shock, and were about to apologise and tell him you’d redo it, but he was quicker.

“What are you doing?!” Donnie asked in a rather harsh tone, swatting away your confidence and eagerness to work with him in one blow. He came around the table to stand next to you and basically yanked the tools out of your hands.

By now you were holding back your tears, cursing at yourself in your mind, thinking how stupid of an idea this had been. One choked sob escaped you, and you brought your hands up to cover your face, turning away from him.

“All I’ve ever wanted was for you to see me” you said over your shoulder. “I like you, Donnie. Sorry for being a bother.” 

You were already taking a step to walk out of the lab, but a hand around your arm held you in place. You turned back around to face the turtle, and you could tell his mind was running at a thousand miles an hour. He was looking at the ground with furrowed brows. It took him a moment to figure out what to say. It was a rather uncomfortable silence but you waited for him. 

Donnie was at a real loss for words. First of all, his comment earlier had been way harsher than intended; he just didn’t want you to get hurt. Which was the main reason he was so reluctant to let you help out in the lab in the first place. And second, he liked you too, he just didn’t know how to tell you.

When his gaze finally found its way back to yours, you gave him a questioning look. Before you realised what was happening he pulled you in for a hug. You were so stunned at his gesture that it took you a second to process it and hug him back. When you finally did, you gave him a reassuring squeeze.

“I do see you” Donnie said and nuzzled his face into the crook of your neck, mainly to hide his face for what he was about to say next. “Thank you for telling me how you feel. It’s the same for me, you know.”

If your heart wasn’t racing before, it surely was now. You two stayed like that for a moment until you separated, a huge smile and tinted cheeks on your face. 

You ended up leaving the lab together to go for a supply run, spending the rest of the afternoon shopping for materials. When you came back, Donnie let you do the circuit again, but this time he helped you, guiding you through the steps.

~~~~~

🐥 taglist: [more info in my pinned post!] @hearteyedracoon, @maribatshipper, @whygz, @lovelylovelydreams, @o0-starboy-0o

[vanyzvat]

ALTR 251521

Chapter 1: No Strings Attached

Chapter 2: His Name (You are here!)

Chapter 3: Jac͟k̷͟s͟͠e̸̷͡ptį͡c̀ę͢͠y̡é

Chapter 4: Chase Brody

Jack is only mentioned briefly, and is erased from the story (Due to being retconned) as a character in Chapter 5 and onward.

Summary: He would never admit it, but part of him is grieving his old life. He's unable to let go of his grudges, and how everything that has happened has affected him. There's a sense of rage that he can never truly express.

He shares with you barely a fraction of what that has been like.

Again, that was an odd question coming from him.

(A lot of things are based off personal headcanons and my own interpretation of these characters! Please keep that in mind. I apologize in advance for any errors! Please let me know if there are any so I can fix them.)

“Ha͟ve͟ you e̕v̧e̡r be̷en ͡be͟tr͏a̢y̴ed̛?”

Wasn't he the one who supposedly knew everything about every person he came across, so he could use that against them? So what was the point of even asking that?

“Don't you already know everything about me?”

“I̕ ̧w̷a͏n͢t ͜t̕o k͠n͏ow y̷our anşw̴e͏r͞.͝”

“Err... I can't say I haven't? But why are you asking me this? Have you been betrayed?”

He turned his head away from you. Ah.

A few seconds passed, and he finally nodded once. Seemed like that was difficult for him to even admit.

He trusted someone, and then that person must've broken that trust- Or something similar. Maybe that was why he was so enraged by the world?

You needed a moment to gather yourself before you gave a response...

Trying to comprehend that this was an entity feared by most, and that right now he was here with you, being treated like any other guest, and was actually opening up to you- It was really weird.

While you were lost in thought, he slowly turned to look at you again. He's waiting for you to say something.

“Sorry for being silent- I'm just thinking...”

“This is a lot to take in. I don't want to say anything stupid.”

“I'̴l͡l͞ s̷t̷op ͡h̸ere.”

“No, no- Don't. I'm just not sure what to say. You can still tell me whatever you want, though. I'll listen to you.”

“...Yo͞u'd b͡e̶ ţh̵è fir͝st.”

You blinked, taken aback again- So much that your mouth even dropped a little.

When IRIS talked about this "ALTR 114209" thing, they described something totally different. A paranormal presence, whose mission was to kill whoever was in its way. That its purpose was nothing more but to cause harm.

Maybe your conspiracies against the company weren't just conspiracies anymore. Maybe this problem had a much simpler solution that they were too ignorant to even think about.

“That's okay. Better late than never, right?”

He then mumbled something which you didn't quite catch.

“Huh...? Sorry- I didn't quite catch that-”

“A̷nti.”

“...What?”

“You w͡ant̴e̛d ͜to͠ know m͢y̨ ̵name.”

“I͡t͟ wãs Anti.”

More silence filled the room.

God, this was a lot of information, especially after barely knowing anything about him for the longest time. What kind of name was that anyway?

“Anti?”

“I͜t̛ was ͝a͢ n͞am͟e gi͝ven to͠ ̷me.”

“...Uh. It's a weird name, I'll be honest? But it's still a nice one. I like it!”

“I̛ li͡ķe͞ ͟it͜, toǫ.”

“So someone gave that name to you- Who? That's assuming you don't have parents or anything like that...”

You heard him exhale through his teeth then watched as he crossed his arms. Probably a touchy subject. But almost everything feels like a touchy subject for him... You didn't know what was okay to ask and what wasn't.

“Loǹg st̶or̕y.”

“It's d͡iffic̛ult t͝o pu̸t into w̸o̵r͡d͡s.”

“Anḑ I̛ alre̸a̵d͠y ͢s͟t͡r͢ug͏gle e̵nou͝gh̡ with simple thīngs.”

While it was true that Anti was not the best at holding up casual conversations, or at communication, you didn't really care.

Besides, he brought his own baggage up, he couldn't just leave you with his name and go without providing any explanation...

And as if he could read your mind-

“Y͟ou ̛want̴ mȩ t̷o͜ ͘c̡on͞tin̡u͝e, d̸o̴n̨'t y͜o͜u.”

“Well, I don't want to be left on a cliffhanger.”

“I̶ c͝a͡n̶ t̀el͜l̛...”

“Į w̛óu̢ld͠n͡'t wan͡t to leave my̸ ͢on̨l̛y͏ ͜fr̕ie͠nd ͟h̕ang͝i͟ņģ, ͝wo͞ul̡d̀ I? Nǫ, I̵ ̕w͏ould̢n't̨.”

Anti was smiling, with his tone as playful as it always was.

But then his smile faded, and his voice became unusually serious.

“I was ma͟ni͢f̛ested. Man͠i̸feste̡d by̵ stro̵n̷g f͝e̢e͡lings o͞f̷ l͏o̡n̢elin̡e͝s̨s͞, wort̡h̨les̨s̡nèss. One͢ mom͞ent I ͜w͝a̕sn̷'t th̨ęre, an̕d̛ the nex͞t, I wàs͝.”

“Manifested? By who?”

“His n͟a̢me dǫe̸sn't ̡ma̡tte̛r.”

Jack— The name of the person who manifested Anti into existence, was Jack. But you didn't know that.

“Was it... The same person who gave you your name?”

“Yes, and n̨o͡...”

“He̕ ̨w͠as ̛lik̢è y͟o͠u̵. H̷e śp̡eńt h͞is ̀d͠a͞ys pro̡vid͡i̷ng e̕ntért̵ainment͢ ͏t̀o͢ t͝h̀e worl̴d.”

“H̷e g̢av͏e, a͢n͞d h̵e g͜av̕e, and͘ he͟ ͏gave͏.”

The memories are flooding back to him.

“Ga̷v͢e̢ so mųch w̧i͢th̴o̢ut͏ e̶ver̸ getting an̕y̶t͞hing in re̛tu͞rn͏.”

...Memories of him watching as Jack overworked himself to insanity, and those that apparently "loved him so much" not caring at all.

Jack gave them everything, and they just watched. Just watched as he neglected himself, as he spiralled.

They didn't deserve him.

Why couldn't Jack understand that?

They only pretended to care about him so they could get their "content". And of course, like the idiot he was, he believed them.

But not Anti. Anti saw through their lies.

Jack was nothing but a source of entertainment to them.

You reminded him of Jack, in a way.

Was that why it was so difficult for him to give up on you?

“Th̛ose lee̶c̕hes... H͟i̴s "co͡mm͟u̡nity" as ͘he c͘a͢l̢led ̶t͠hem— T̢hey thínk ţh͡éy ma͡ḑe͢ A͞ǹtį.”

He raised his voice, his voice full of hatred towards those "people". He twitched uncontrollably, with reality warping around him to match his state of mind.

“Bu͝ţ they d͜ìd͞n͝'t͡ ͝mak͏e An͘ti͡. He did.”

You didn't give much of a response, besides nodding along to let him know you were paying attention. It wasn't that you weren't bothered to, it was that you didn't know how to.

You weren't a supernatural being, so it wasn't as if you could somehow relate to many of the things he mentioned. So you settled for just listening to him talk...

He was willing to open up to you, even just a bit, and you weren't going to make it all about you.

“Well, Anti, I guess this means you aren't as one-dimensional as IRIS claims you are.”

He laughed. It sounded strangely normal.

“Oh, th͡e͏y d͘o͠n't know an̨ythin̶g about̴ me.”

Despite him being someone who was meant to terrify you, you were fine. As for him...

“Were you scared?”

Your question must have confused him a bunch, because the distortion around you immediately subsided.

“W̶ha͜t?”

“Were you scared of talking to me. About all this.”

He raised an eyebrow at you.

“Y͘ou̸ h̀a̷ve a͜ l̀ot ̵of aud͏ac̨i̕ty ̕to̸ a͟s̕k͞ ͜m͞e that̵.”

“I'm only curious...”

You shrugged.

“...It'̨s͝ be̶en a̛t͏ thé ba̢c̷k o̕f my̢ min͢d f̷o̴r a w̕h́ile ̛noẃ.”

“T̢he̛r͢e's many̵ th̵ing̵s I ̀wish I͠ ̴c̡o͜uļd sh̵a͡re ̨w͘ith y͢ou̧. I͢ j͏us͠t̡ ̷don't͠ kno͝w͟ h͏ow̛ tó... Yēt.”

“It's okay. I think I understand, anyway.”

“You're basically the embodiment of someone's negative thoughts, right?”

“S͏óm͟ethin͠g like ̸tha͠t̷.”

“Eh, whatever. Still, I don't expect a being like you to know much about emotions. Let alone how to express them.”

He could only nod silently...

He seemed to be doing that a lot around you.

Everywhere he went, he left destruction behind, so it was very awkward having someone treat him like any other person for a change. He didn't get why you were like the way you were, and it made Anti feel sick to be in the dark.

It felt weird to not have control of the situation. He couldn't find the right words to describe how you made him feel.

Part of him did feel afraid, so you were right in a way. He despised talking about things that bothered him- Things that made him feel small and weak. All he wanted was to be the one looking down at those inferior to him, he didn't need sob stories.

But you- Why were you different?

“Is there... Anything else?”

You interrupt his train of thought.

“Çan ͜I sta̸y͢ ẁi͠th yo͡ú f͟o͠r ́a͜ w͟hįl͏e͡?”

“Of course!”

You didn't anticipate for Anti to "teleport" closer to you, but you didn't mind. He wanted company, and were there to provide. You liked his company too.

You looked at him. He's staring off into nothing. What's he thinking about?

He soon caught you staring at him, and you immediately glanced off.

After a moment, you felt him rest his head on your shoulder, and you didn't bother stopping him.

He wasn't a social being, like you said. So you kinda predicted that this whole thing would tire him more than the average person.

Him showing you any sort of affection was a little surprising, but you didn't mind that either. You got to know him a little better today.

A couple of minutes pass.

He's been awfully quiet, and part of you is concerned because he's never quiet. You're not sure if he was content or upset.

“You okay?”

“Y̴eāh.”

“I͢'m upsēt things h̕av͟e to be t̕hȩ ͢way̷ they͞ ́are, bu͢t yóù make i͢t ea͢sie̵r̛.”

Oh!

You smiled.

“Thank you for trusting me.”

He really hoped you wouldn't break that trust.

He was still doubtful about everything he had just told you, but he was trying to have faith in you. But he didn't have much faith in humans, really.

...You eventually realized that he never really spoke about what happened in regards to this entire "betrayal" thing.

If anything, the only thing he had done today was vaguely provide you with very little context, if any. He only admitted that this betrayal had something to do with the unnamed person he mentioned.

“Can you... Tell me more about this "betrayal"?”

“I̴ kno͡w̛ yo̕u̢'̛re c͡uri̡òu̷s̡, būt- A̧noth̴ȩr t̶im̀e.”

His voice was quiet. Was it really something that personal?

“Alright, I can wait.”

You shifted around, changing position until you got comfortable. He waited for you, then went right back to what he was doing before.

You closed your eyes.

The two of you stayed that way for a while longer, not bothering to talk.

It felt like time itself had stopped.

It was quite nice, actually.

“Th́an͡k̸ yòu̶,”

“Huh? For what?”

“I fórg̨ot͡ what ̀it w͏as͜ ͢lik̢e to̡ b̴e a ̸pe͏r̡son. To ͢b̨e͏ tr͝e͠ąte͞d͡ like a pe̴rsơn.”

“I'm here to remind you.”

A smile appears on his face.

You couldn't see it, but you still had a feeling he was doing a little better than when he first arrived...

This was bittersweet for him.

He had been in denial for so long, years even, to the point where just thinking about Jack and about his situation felt like someone was cutting him up to bits.

His old life was gone.

He was alone.

To everyone, he was nothing more but a demonic presence, who took the lives of those in his path without reason.

But you sympathised with him, somehow. You listened to him and welcomed him, despite everything. It was weird- You were weird.

He knew many people had no one in their life, but none of them had fallen as low as you. Even if they wanted to die, their instincts still kicked in when they saw him...

Oh well.

It didn't matter.

It still meant so much to him.

You couldn't even fathom how much he'd yearned to have someone in his life- Even he never realized how isolated he really was in this world. Until he found you. A friend.

His eyes shut on their own, and he let them. He didn't necessarily need sleep, but somehow, he was still tired.

It was a contrast to how he usually acted, especially in regards to the records IRIS had of him.

He couldn't recall the last time he felt a sense of safety.

A feeling of somewhere he belonged, the feeling of home.

That's it- That's how he would describe how you made him feel if he ever needed to put it into words. You felt like home.

And as you eventually fell asleep besides him, Anti realized he didn't have to always be alone.

Not giving up on you when he should've was a mistake, and it was his best one yet.

[dyns33]

Good uncles prequel

Last Sandman and Good Omens crossover. 

When Y/N came to visit Aziraphale in his bookshop, he was a little surprised. Of course, he was always happy to see his dear niece, little Antichrist who had chosen not to destroy the world, but most of the time it was him or Crowley who went to see her, and if the reverse happened, that meant that something was going on.

     "I need advice." she said, looking desperate.

     "And you come to see me... Me ? Just me ?"

     "Yes. I think the divine and good side is most appropriate in this situation."

"Oh, sweet heaven, this is the best day of my long life. Sit down my child, I'm bringing tea and biscuits !"

Aziraphale's joy faded a bit when Y/N explained to him that she was here because of a man. A man she liked to spend time with, whose discussions were very pleasant, and with whom she hoped there would be more.

     "... When you say 'more'... You're talking about becoming his best friend ?" "No. I love him."

     "And that's very good ! Love is a noble feeling, which God encourages. We must love all the beings who populate the earth. But there are also the dangers of sins, and lust..."

     "Uncle Aziraphale, I'm an adult, I don't need that kind of explanation. To be honest, I don't have those kind of thoughts. Well, I won't be against it, but what I really want is to always be with him, and to let everyone know that we are together, faithful to each other."

     "Ah, the sacred bonds of marriage, good !"

     "I don't know about the wedding yet. His niece told me he was married before and..."

     "He is divorced !" cried the angel, putting a hand to his mouth. "That's not... Wait. His niece ? How old is he ?!"

     "I'll tell you again, I'm an adult, so it's none of your business. Anyway, I don't even know if he's even interested in me that way. He didn't do anything to show me that we were more than just friends. And that worries me. Should I tell him how I feel ? But if he doesn't love me back ? If he doesn't want to see me anymore ? I don't want to lose him. But if I say nothing, and he meets someone else ? Oh, uncle, help me, please !"

The best advice he could give her was to be patient. It was nice that they were already friends, it was a good start, and at some point Y/N could clearly see if she had a chance with this man.

     "What about... my situation ? Do you think I should tell him ?"

     “Probably not right away, but after a while... Yes, by finding the right words. A relationship cannot go well with secrets and lies. You have to be appreciated for who you really are."

     "Thank you Uncle Aziraphale."

     "Thank you for coming to seek guidance from an angel."

He would probably have been much less pleased to learn that a few days later, Y/N knocked on Uncle Crowley's door, to ask him exactly the same questions, considering that it was good to have several opinions, but not telling the demon that she was to see Aziraphale first.

     "You made the right decision coming to see me, little mouse. Tell me everything." purred Crowley, offering her a glass of wine.

     "Well. There is this man."

     "Ah. I wish you had started with a simpler sin, but if we're going to have this conversation..."

     "It's really not necessary ! Anyway. There is this man, who is not really a man, I think."

     "You think ?"

     "Well, he's one of my friends' uncle."

     "A sugar daddy, very good."

     "Uncle Crowley !" Y/N growled, grimacing in shame. "It's not like that at all. He's young. Anyway, he looks young. I thought so until yesterday. I met a friend of his, we talked and he was surprised that I don't like Shakespeare. Without doing it on purpose, I said that my uncles had met him, that he was a complete idiot, and that they often had to help him with his plays, and you know what he said ? 'I have a friend who did that too !' Hob is over six hundred years old, Uncle Crowley ! And his friend is the man I love. Maybe... Maybe that's a good sign ? It's better for me to love a supernatural being, right ? You know, with my... heritage ?"

     "It depends. Many people are afraid of Lucifer, so the Antichrist ? There would only be someone very nice, or a satanic not to run away, but a satanic could be bad. I'm not talking about real satanics, but about the fools who do what the demons ask them to do, they're the worst. That's my advice."

Crowley's advice was of course the exact opposite of what Aziraphale had told Y/N. For him, she had to act quickly, do everything to seduce the man she wanted, but she shouldn't tell him what she was. Either way, she had no intention of destroying the world, so it didn't really matter who found out who her real parent was, her adoptive parents were more than enough.

It didn't take long for the two uncles to discover that their adorable niece had consulted them both, and her conclusion was that it was necessary to do a little what they had said, but not completely.

Y/N therefore made the decision to be patient with the being who had stolen her heart, flirting so and so innocently to let him guess that she was not indifferent to him. She implied that she was not a normal human, but never mentioned hell. It seemed like a good decision, which they approved.

Then she invited them to meet her dear friend.

The meeting did not happen, because as they arrived near the pub, the angel and the demon saw someone who should not have been there.

     "What is Dream of the Endless doing in a place like this ?" whispered Aziraphale.

     "He's walking around, and it's a coincidence ? Right ?"

     "I don't know. He... He's talking with people. Mortals."

      "Probably servants, helping him out in the waking world."

     "One of the human servants is talking with our Y/N."

     "I know, he calls himself Hob, and she's in love with his friend who doesn't like Shakespeare ! She's not… No. No." Crowley sighed in despair when his niece went to sit next to Morpheus, looking at him with sparkling eyes and a huge smile.

It was a real disaster.

Of all the beings existing in this universe, and the others, Y/N had to meet and fall in love with Dream of the Endless. He hadn't had as many conquests as his sibling Desire, but he could still be considered a womanizer, whose stories didn't have very nice endings.

A bad ending could lead to the end of the world, if Y/N was not at the origin of the break up. Or if she was, and he tried to send her to hell. 

     "We have to tell her." growled the snake.

     "I don't know. Maybe we shouldn't get involved. She's smart, and he may have already told her about his past."

     "Please. He's ashamed of this past, and he's a proud man. She doesn't know anything. I know ! I saw Nada ! I saw his son. I talked to a witch who wanted to offer me a deal to get revenge on him !"

     "It is true that Calliope was very unhappy after their separation. Oh, the divorce, of course ! The fairy queen is also still furious with him. And there are all the others."

     "We must tell her who he is, and especially how he is with women. I refuse that she suffers because of an Endless !"

     "I don't want her to suffer in general. But she really loves him, and love can make you blind. We have to find the right approach, so that she considers it would be a good thing if they were only friends."

It then seemed judicious to them to go to the essential, preparing a long speech on what was an Endless, and especially Dream. A cold, distant being, who focused on his work above all else, therefore not being available to anyone. And to avoid scattering, they chose to tell her that all his former relationships had been tragic, but to really only talk about Nada, who was trapped in Hell.

It was quite appropriate, and close to home. Y/N would certainly not want to end up here, where she would have to meet her parent.

And as always, whenever they had a great plan, things didn't go their way at all.

[aemiron-main]

A Freshman?? Something Weird Is Going On With Henry’s Age And EVEN MORE FIRM EVIDENCE FOR MULTIPLE TIMELINES!!

So, James sent me this pic:

And it’s bizarre, frankly, because Henry should be 12 (and therefore not a freshman) in 1959.

What’s really interesting, though, is the way they worded that sentence:

“And we can’t forget, Henry Creel will be a freshman when we turn back the clocks to Hawkins in 1959.”

And it’s interesting, because this line about Henry’s weird age includes two things that are tied to Edward.

1.) the “and we can’t forget” part is tied to Edward based on what I talked about in this post regarding Eddie Munson vs Edward Creel and people not remembering Eddie Munson vs people not remembering Edward Creel.

2.) the “turn back the clock,” part is tied to Edward based on what I talked about in this post regarding the scene of Henward literally turning back the clock and why that’s likely Edward, rather than Henry.

Henry is 12 years old in 1959. This is canon:

But the play is also canon:

Which means that they can’t (and won’t) just change Henry’s canon age randomly for no reason- there’s something else going on here.

And also, something that caught my eye is the wording in that post, too- “canon event”, because “Into The Spiderverse,” is on the S4 board:

And a “canon event” in Spiderverse is an event that must happen/can’t be interfered with, because interfering with it can cause the destruction of the multiverse. It also tends to involve the loss of a parental figure and the death of a police captain, which has me staring DIRECTLY at a.) the Creel murders and Virginia’s death/Victor’s imprisonment b.) Alice being missing from TFS and c.) Hopper’s dad/the police chief being in TFS. Timeline fuckery/multiple timelines is afoot here for sure, as usual.

And it’s extra weird that Edward moved to Hawkins two years before Henry- and we don’t know Edward’s age. If Edward was 15 in 1959 (being 12 in 1957, when he moved to Hawkins), then it would explain why he’s a freshman.

They also didnt tell Raphael Luce who he was playing in ST4- he didn’t know that he was playing 001 until the day he got it tattooed on his wrist. So, the ST team/the Duffers aren’t above keeping information away from their own cast, let alone the audience.

However, there may also be a far simpler explanation for this (although, of course, the points about canon events and timeljne weirdness still apply)- the wonderful @reikunrei also pointed out that “freshman,” is also simply a synonym for “newcomer,” which is what Henry is in Hawkins:

So, there’s a chance that they’re just messing with us & chose to use the word “freshman,” because they knew it would confuse people/mess with them.

Anyway! I’m super excited for TFS because every day, things just get weirder!

[rahuratna]

WAIT I ACCIDENTALLY PRESSED SUBMIT WKDNNDKSKKD.

My bad, I don’t know what to do… 😭 😭

Uhh, I’ll just continue you off here… (I’m so sorry).

Ahem. Mahito. My sworn enemy. Murderer of the love of my life. I will never ever forgive— but, oh gosh, why is his voice so… AHEM. I got distracted.

Mahito said this one thing that piqued my interest. Don’t remember the exact words but it was something along the lines of: “I’m grateful to you.” So interesting. We talked a lot about how gratitude was one of Nanami’s motivations, how it gave him purpose. And it came from the innocent/weak and his comrades. But this is coming from a curse 😬

I can’t really give an explanation as to why… because his interaction with Nanami led him to discovering domain expansion? Is that it?? I guess Mahito growing stronger is something he gets off of, the thrill of it and also identity shenanigans, but I do not spend time pondering over my mortal enemies 😁 (Just kidding… here I am… intrigued by Mahito and his stupidly cute voice… I still hate him… I can’t help but wonder… ugh)

The reason I find this so interesting is how at the end, Mahito is stronger than Nanami. When Mahito ends Nanami, I doubt that he remembers or acknowledges any of the gratitude back then. Specifically because he said to Yuji, “I’ll probably forget you in the future too.” Gratitude to Mahito is meaningless. I think that also just shows how different curses are from humans. Gratitude plays such a big part for a lot of human happiness. But not for curses.

I found Mahito’s philosophy very interesting, the way that he saw everything as pointless which led to him doing whatever he wanted to do. Which is killing people (my beloved 😭) and propelling the endless cycle of war between curses and humans. It reminds me of nihilism sorta kinda maybe IDK. Again, I just haven’t given it much thought because he’s Mahito…

Ah, you know what. This reminds me of Attack on Titan (🥸). Marleyans vs. Eldians. Each side is fighting for survival, so they can have their own world. They wanted the same things, have their own peaceful world, but it just so happened that they were on opposing sides with a long history of violence and racism. Same thing with curses and humans. They both want to occupy the world, live their own lives, but they just can’t coexist. Mahito doesn’t see any side as right or wrong. His choices and decisions are based on impulse and desire. The lack of empathy is what makes him realllly different from Eren but I think the vision is very similar. They both stick to one side and fight for it because that’s the side they were born into. It’s so cool how there are overlapping themes of endless cycles. Like either with humanity against curses or a divided humanity against itself.

In conclusion, I feel very frustrated, confused, mad, and intrigued about Mahito. UGH. How dare he have an amazing VA and also cause so much pain and suffering. UNFAIR. CRUEL. I dislike him but I don’t. Would I have disliked him more if I only read the manga and he never had a voice? 😐😑😐

(Side note, I also realized ep 13 was when Nanami actually actually acknowledged Yuji as a sorcerer. Now I have to draw more Papamin. Sigh. I swear, everytime the topic of Nanami is brought up, it evokes a physically sigh from me.)

Sighing to sign off,

courtney 💜💜

Hi @courtneedsleep ! I am the world's biggest procrastinator, both in the way you mentioned and with regards to work I don't like/have little interest in. When it comes to series, absolutely! I put things off when I know I will enjoy them. I have a whole list of shows (anime included) that I know are brilliant and have been putting off for some time now, all because I know I will love them and want to savour them properly!

So, essentially, I don't know when I will end up watching Paranoia Agent, Odd Taxi or From the New World, but I know I'll love them 🤭

I've actually been re-watching some of season 1 myself (ah, simpler times) and Mahito is genuinely such an excellent character (as much as I want to do unspeakably horrible things to him).

Mahito initially came across, to me, as something of a contradiction. He was evidently born from human folly, and shows great delight in manipulating and tormenting humans, as he does with Junpei. You could almost say that he uses humans in the same way that sorcerers use cursed tools. That's what they are to him. Tools to be used to further the ends of cursed spirits.

This is where Mahito struck me as being truly dangerous: his fight with Nanami. He comes across (as Nanami comments) as fickle, sadistic, immature, barely aware of the impact of his own actions and with the air of a child playing with and destroying their toys. What is doubly terrifying is the power that he possesses, leaving others at the mercy of his whim.

Mahito's power is also terrifying and, from my initial perspective, almost inappropriate for a cursed spirit like him. He is able to accurately perceive the soul, in spite of being an 'immature' spirit, and downright psychopathic (by human standards). His power, like you said, is heavily instinctual and relies on his reading of a moment, emotions or the way a person responds to things.

The moment when he 'thanks' Nanami also stands out to me. It's almost like a child thanking their parent for a new plaything, something that might increase their status or bargaining power on the playground. Naturally, the child won't remember that act of gratitude for long, over the pleasure that their possession brings, or the manner in which they use it. That's going by the standard of regular children, of course, and Mahito is anything but regular, let alone human.

When Mahito eventually kills Nanami, he feels nothing of normal human gratitude. As far as he is concerned, Nanami has played his part, has helped him achieve more power, and can now be disposed of like all of the other human 'tools' as a means of furthering the cause of cursed spirits.

Yes. Pretty callous and inhumane overall. As expected. But then, Mahito subverted my expectations. As the series progressed, I began to see what you described; the attachment to his comrades, declaring a clear purpose for cursed spirits on earth, bringing about the return of Sukuna, and creating a new reality beneficial to cursed spirits overall. Very similar to the Marleyans and Eldians, this shows two species that are determined to carve a place for themselves in the world, to declare their right to exist, but also not able to tolerate the existence of each other.

Mahito suddenly displayed characteristics that were so much more human. I could no longer think of him as 'just another capricious curse' with no real understanding of the havoc he caused. His attachments to his own comrades spoke very clearly of that fact that he understood just how sadistic and terrible his actions were, they were just directed at humans, and so, he simply didn't care.

He was able to be so carefree not because he was totally unhinged, but because he saw humans the way humans saw curses. If we think of it from that perspective, he killed Nanami, just as Nanami exorcised cursed spirits.

Is there therefore a difference between him and Nanami, as viewed from either side? Fundamentally, yes. Nanami is shown to offer comfort and compassion to transformed humans, even as he has to take their lives. He understands all too well the weight of taking lives; Mahito does not.

This is all too clear when he prioritizes taking out Nobara, someone who's technique is a direct threat to him. Mahito suddenly learns what mortal peril feels like, what it means to be on the receiving end. Unlike Nanami, who truly did expect to meet his death as a sorcerer, and fully understood the risks, Mahito was still a child playing in an adult world, albeit, a horrendously powerful and dangerous child.

It's also extremely clear later (I won't spoil things, because I'm not exactly certain where in the show you are) that he is terrified of Yuuji's single-minded pursuit of him and desire to eradicate what he represents. Mahito does learn the true meaning of fear, he does come to understand the weight of lives, he does come to understand his own smallness on the scale of things. As philosophical as he came across, he applied those concepts very narrowly, and in ways that were heavily prejudiced by his own conception as a cursed spirit.

Mahito is such a great character, a truly adaptable and ever-evolving antagonist, and he's just delectably detestable, isn't he?

(Side note: It WAS the first time Nanami acknowledged him as a sorcerer! Proud Nanamin. 😭 I love that he's so caring and compassionate to Yuuji without ever overstepping the bounds of what he believes is true. He won't give praise where it's not deserved. He's not a sentimental man given to overt displays of affection. He's blunt to a fault. Which makes the occasions where he DOES acknowledge the students so much more meaningful and precious).

[vickyvicarious]

i can't lie, i'm ESL (english as second language) and i consider myself basically fluent but when seward start talking about parallels and centrifuge i felt my brain short-circuiting. do you have any explanations and theories on wtf that part was supposed to mean? just the stream of consciousness ramblings of a spiraling dude? or something actually meaningful?

In selfish men caution is as secure an armour for their foes as for themselves. What I think of on this point is, when self is the fixed point the centripetal force is balanced with the centrifugal; when duty, a cause, etc., is the fixed point, the latter force is paramount, and only accident or a series of accidents can balance it.

He does mean something by this for sure, but much like his Latin earlier he's saying it in a way that can definitely be confusing to the average reader. In this case, he's using scientific language to describe his concept. I believe I get his intended message, but it's the kind of thing that I'm not really scientifically-minded enough to be sure I'm explaining correctly. So if anyone out there can do better, please hop in and correct me/elaborate as needed!

Spoken simply, he's invoking two concepts: centripetal and centrifugal. I think this comparison of the concepts is fairly approachable. But in even simpler (and admittedly less precise) terms...

centrifugal = pushing out

centripetal = pulling in

So, if you spin something around a central point, the connection that keeps it spinning rather than just flying away is centripetal. The sensation it has that is being pulled away from the middle is centrifugal.

There's all this stuff as well about how centrifugal force isn't technically a 'real' force, just an 'apparent' one, but that's not so relevant for Seward's point here. What's he's using this language to say, essentially, is this.

When 'selfishness' (inward focus, centripetal) is at the center of someone's nature, other things (outward focus, centrifugal) don't pull them off course too much because they're too worried about keeping themselves safe. This means they maintain a more fixed orbit, essentially. They're more predictable.

When a duty or cause is at the center, however, the two forces are not in balance, and they can suddenly stop spinning around in a circle to go flying off somewhere unexpectedly. They behave in unpredictable and possibly dangerous ways without necessarily giving much warning. This is because self-preservation (inward focus, centripetal) is less important to them than their duty/cause (outward focus, centrifugal). So even if flying out of orbit hurts them too, they won't care or stop.

Where he talks about accidents balancing things, he's basically saying that a balance between these forces is needed to keep them stable/predictable. And by his definition, unselfish people will only become balanced by chance, so long as the current situation suits their cause. There's not really a way to plan for it or count on them to make it happen in the same way he thinks selfish people can be predicted or managed. That's why selfish peoples' caution is an armor for both themselves and their enemies - being cautious keeps them safe, but makes them predictable which lets their enemies keep safe too.

To bring it all into focus with Renfield: if Renfield is more worried about keeping himself safe, he won't do anything risky to himself. But if he doesn't care about that and is fully driven by some fixation, then he might (for example) attack a person even if doing so will get him in greater trouble. As long as it serves his fixation, he wouldn't care about the consequences.

...hopefully that made a bit more sense to you!

[emmic0n]

Goober theory

so, one kinda out-there theory I have is that the goobers (that's what I'm calling the little mindless shape-dudes from the trailer) are/were humans who have "reached their breaking point", as, according to Ragatha, something "really terrible" happens at that point. A snag in this is Kinger, dude is clearly 30 miles past his breaking point, he's a wreck. a way this could still work with my theory is if "breaking point" refers to going completely unresponsive or fully detached from reality. Kinger is at least sane enough to participate/interact with the other humans.

his description says that he's been there longer than anyone. if we take "anyone" to mean the other 5 humans, then he might not necessarily be the first human to be trapped, just the oldest non-goober. if "anyone" refers to everyone (besides Caine and maybe bubble) then that would mean Kinger actually has some impressive mental fortitude to not become a goober even when so many humans who came after him did.

of course, this all hinges on my goober theory being correct, which even I, the person who theorized it in the first place, don't really believe to be the case. The most likely explanation is that they're even simpler AIs than bubble.