#and that even if the female characters are written with a decent amount of depth to their character they are still at the whims of

[traitimdoithay]

me: damn why does the yugioh anime suck with how it handles all the female characters

shounen genre:

me: ah, of course

[amberarmedheart]

An Experiment on Bad Writing

Lately, I have been on a reading journey. It has been part of my objective to regain, at least partially, the joy of being alive that the act of being alive at the end of times has gradually stolen from me the past five years.

Therefore, finding a variety of genres to engage with has been my hands on approach: a few literary fiction ones (currently reading Suite Francaise knowing quite well it will destroy me in the end), a few niche stories (reading The Man From UNCLE's No. 18 "The Unfair Fare Affair, which so far is as silly as the name suggests), and a good amount of romance. This last genre being the main source of concern right now, as god knows I try, as a pointless romantic, to find romance in every piece of media I engage with.

I made the mistake of watching Bridgerton and then believing the books would be good enough to spend some time with... oh, how wrong I was! The show is entertaining enough, silly and engaging in its own way. But the books? Oh, the books are so simple. I could only stomach the first book and it is a testament of my willpower that I didn't throw the thing away when *that scene* happened. But I am getting ahead of myself.

Let me explain my problems with The Duke and I:

It is simple in both writing and plot. It is no wonder the adaptation mixed in more of the stories of the other books, along with new characters and new plots for older ones. If the thing had been left as is for the adaptation, I believe it would have been barely enough to be played in two hours of the show. There is no depth, no substance, no situation or plot device that would warrant the thing to be turned into anything more than a tv movie to be watched at your local tv station on a Sunday morning when your father is using the good tv that is hooked to the cable to watch the Cowboys lose once again against the Giants.

I believe the book series has the incredible blessing of being in hands of the producer it got, and capable writers who have made it a more dynamic narrative than whatever it is that the first book was. The mere thought of the book as-is being adapted sends the bad kind of shivers down my spine.

Oh, and yes, I have both read and written plot devices way darker than the one involving non-con elements in the first book, but the way it is portrayed is quite unnerving. There you are, having a couple of main characters that are decent enough, albeit a bit bland, just to suddenly get in the head of the female lead and discover she is actually enjoying the feeling of taking advantage of her drunk husband. I have heard some people point out the fact of her knowing next to nothing about sexual matters, which yes, it's a thing. But once again, I don't think the way it is portrayed, the sudden look we get into a character that presented next to no internal dialogue now having quite a detailed introspective look at her desires and her wish of having a child no matter how much she knows her husband despises the idea... That definitely doesn't sit well with me.

The way it is ultimate resolved, with barely any acknowledgement of the act and only the male lead being angry that she witnessed him having an "episode" of his greatest insecurity - with them basically saying the non-con wasn't that bothersome - it's just ignorant at best and concerning at worst.

The book in general reads as a quasi-script, with the author having good chunks of the story being one liners exchanged between the characters time and again. I have to confess I had to switch to the audiobook in order not to get bored out of my brain when said exchanges involved more than three characters.

Having said this, I did finish the book, if anything to prove myself that I could and at least form my opinion on what the so called hype was about.

Fate decided that wasn't torture enough, and the next book I picked to read ended up being something even worse: "When In Rome".

Imagine for a moment you are 13 years old, your ultimate idol is Taylor Swift and you are writing your very first fanfic because you have observed other people like to do that, so you want to try it too. Well, that's what When In Rome is: baby's first RPF, featuring not-Taylor Swift, who is a global superstar that is tired and depressed because fame has isolated her from her family and every other relationship, leaving her with nothing "real", so in her attempt of clearing the fog, she ends up traveling to a tiny town in the US called Rome, and falling in love with the 13yo writer's idea of a sexy man... which, of course, is a big tall guy that is super manly and grumpy, but owns a Pie Shop in the godforsaken town, has three sisters and an old woman who is his neighbor, and has "manly hair" on his arms.

Mind you, every single person in town is oh-so-nice and kind and honest, not like the people Not-Taylor knows from anywhere else; and of course every single side character's true purpose in the whole plot is to be rooting for the couple, appearing every few pages out of nowhere just to give 25 second pieces of advice to Not-Taylor, so she can get closer to the main guy.

This is the kind of story that you write for yourself when you are in junior high, the one that maybe you share with your friends in chat or casually posted it on Wattpad after a wave of messages from your fellow swifty friends who told you it is super cute and you should share it, because of course it is cute because it is your first real person fanfic and you are thirteen and according to the Hallmark Channel movies you sometimes watch, that's how romance stories work.

But paying for this? Oh god, no. No, never. Thank god I have alternative means of acquiring media, because heaven knows i would have fought tooth and nail to get back my money for this thing.

And don't get me wrong, I love a stupidly silly romance, I am all for it. But this is just something that makes no sense being this bad.

Wanna watch a silly romance movie with decent acting? I suggest "The Decoy Bride", staring the magnificent David Tennant. Gorgeous setting, super simple plot and yet incredibly entertaining.

Wanna watch a romance filled with cliches and tropes that yet manages to weave the plot well enough to make sense? Watch "One Small Hitch", which is basically the classic fake dating trope but made right.

Now, I will try to go find another romance book to read and forget about the horrors of late stage capitalism. Maybe, if I read something from Anthony Bourdain, I can make this shit pass.

[separatist-apologist]

Will you explain Ariana's origins though?

Fine. A little Separatist-Apologist lore.

Back in May of 2021, I (new to the fandom), decided I wanted to write an elucien fanfiction. I knew almost nothing about the fandom and at that point had read like, 3 total fics across the different Lucien/Elain ships just kind of getting a feel for things. I knew two things for certain- I wanted Vassa to be Elain's friend, and I wanted Lucien to have a reckoning with his family.

And so I started Call It What You Want To

I knew I wanted Elain to have a Day Court friend and I wanted a reason to keep Eris around in later chapters, and so I very lazily dreamt up Arina. Here she is, for the first time ever, on chapter 6:

She took a breath. She could figure it out. Elain was certain there was more to her than pretty dresses and dancing at parties. She stood, prepared to find Lucien and force him watch her try on clothes all day when a soft knock interrupted her plans. Elain opened the door and found Helion, utterly shirtless and in a white kilt embroidered with shimmering gold, looking down at her with a too-bright grin for how early it was. Next to him was perhaps the most beautiful woman Elain had ever seen. Her golden skin rivaled that of the domes she’d seen on the palace itself, though it somehow paled when Elain took in her long, shiny blonde hair falling in a glossy sheet to her waist. Her meadow green eyes were peering back at Elain with open, unabashed curiosity.

One of Helion’s lovers, Elain decided, soaking in the woman’s bright blue dress. The hem cut to her mid-thigh and the strap twisted over one flawless shoulder, making her tan seem more prominent, more beautiful.

“Elain, you’re awake,” Helion interrupted Elain’s obvious ogling.

Elain nodded, turning her attention back to the High Lord.

“I planned to give you a tour today, but I’ve been detained so I thought I’d leave you in the very capable hands of one of my best scholars, Arina. She’s going to show you around, answer any questions, and generally make you feel welcome.”

Arina nodded solemnly.

I don't think she has a terrible amount of depth in that fic, and her and Eris mostly happen outside the periphery of the story. Originally, Elain had two female friends and I scrapped the other because I was losing track of all my characters. So she stayed, which kept Eris coming back, which was important given he later kidnaps Elain. Back then there weren't all these Eris ships to choose from.

And I HATED Azriel back then. If you re-read my earliest works, I almost never include or mention him, and if I do he's a massive (silent) bastard. I don't know if Azris was even kicking around back then but part of the why arina/why not Azris is I don't like Azriel. Occasionally, in a modern AU or when Fitz writes him with Eris but in canon and in most other works, he is just not it for me.

I did write Neris, later on- No One Likes A Mad Woman but that was pretty short-lived for me.

Anyway, when I was working on I Know Places, I was lamenting how I missed her and wished I had done more with her, and someone sent an anon saying. she could come back. And that was all the encouragement I needed. She has been in every fic I've written in which Eris is featured (minus the aforementioned Neris), because I like her. And she's fairly popular with the people who consistently read what I write, AND for those of us who have been hanging out the whole time, it feels like a group project almost.

And I guess lastly, my OC's are decently popular and creating and utilizing her convinced me to work more on my own original writing.

[opinion-piecemeal]

Recently one of my partners re-watched Legend of Korra and I happened to see bits and pieces of it while they watched through ALL of it. Just gonna say it’s genuinely a terribly written show. Like. Okay I’m not like a Last Airbender super-stan or anything (which I hope would be obvious as I hadn’t watched Korra for years), but it is substantially more interesting and better paced. I haven’t seen every episode of Korra but like, the introduction of Korra herself is completely half assed.

Like one of the first scenes shows her being able to do 3 different bending elements as a literal INFANT. A fuckin not-even-child. Barely older than a baby. And she can bend water, fire, and earth already. And she spends, what, 20 years NOT learning the one type she couldn’t already do??? It’s like spitting in the face of Last Airbender. “Oh the avatar this time is so much cooler and better guys, so much more capable.” Like I know the point is that we’ve already seen the training happen in the original (which was my personal favorite aspect of the original, but that’s neither here nor there), and now we can skip most of this training business and move right on to the “cool and interesting stuff” because apparently the very literally spiritual journey of learning these very deeply intimate techniques, pushing yourself into the literal spirit world, is not interesting enough. (I know they do the spirit world stuff later, it fucking blows chunks also). But could you not have simply introduced Korra AS AN ADULT, so it makes sense that she knows how to do 3/4 bending styles already?! Because she’s been training to understand and master them her whole life? But no, instead we get “she already knew how to do 3 of them. Skip 20 years. She still knows how to do the same 3 elements but she’s a little better now”. Like. C’mon man.

I really don’t like that the Chi blocking is just. A thing. That ANYONE can do with the right equipment. That takes away all the weight and impact of its original usage in Airbender. It was literally the last resort. Aang had been told over and over again that he HAD to kill Lord Ozai, even if it went against his very nature. Aang had to literally conceive of an option that didn’t even exist in the mind of any person, including past avatars. He had to figure out how to take away Ozai’s powers without conceding his morals, without sinking to the depth of taking a life. That’s heavy shit, that has a lot of weight to it. But no. Now they can just Do That if they get a new fangled piece of technology.

I dislike almost every character that I’ve seen, I don’t like how they’re written mostly, Korra is boring. She lacks a decent amount of defining character traits, and kind of just is “girlboss who’s already good at everything even if she fails sometimes”. I don’t want to call her a Mary Sue because I really haven’t seen enough to give a full well rounded take on her characterization, but from the sporadic bits and pieces I’ve seen throughout the show, at least 3 episodes from each season, I can tell you that at almost no point did she interest me. It felt like they just wanted to portray a strong female character again with none of the nuance they did with most of the female character from Airbender, and with way less effort.

Oh my god also I keep hearing from random fans of the show (like in irl conversations with friends) that “you just have to get passed the first 2 seasons”. Why is that acceptable? Why is it an okay thing to ignore an entire 1/2 of the fucking show to get to the good stuff? Like no. You wasted my time with your piss poor attempt at writing, I don’t want to sit through a shit ton of random episodes just because there’s some “good stuff” down the line. Like yeah, a few episodes in is whatever, it usually takes a few episodes for the people making the show to fully find their footing and how they want to produce the show itself, but 2 entire seasons? 2 seasons of some really lazy dialogue, lazy exposition, serviceable at best performances, decent at best fight choreography, and little to no character chemistry??? I’m set. I’m so good man. I don’t care if there’s the best monologue in modern history in your last episode, you did not give me enough enjoyment. I understand taking the good with the bad and trying to find the good in all media, but how is it that I’ve heard “oh just ignore the first 2 seasons” from real life people talking about it like that’s an okay thing???

I don’t really feel qualified to give much of an in-depth anything on this show, but these were my thoughts and reactions to it when I watched what little I’ve watched from it. I just hated it man. Deep dislike from the moment I watched the first minute of it and nothing about it piqued my interest after.

Idk. Anyway. That’s just like, my opinion, man.

[rosesfox]

To what that Anon said, beware im about to get some of similar complaints about ACOSF and Nesta’s growth too storm!

GOD I’m dreading Elain being ruined the way Nesta was for me too especially after how she developed her in ACOSF. Nesta being a warrior can fit any cold female character sure but a character who hasn’t gotten off her ass in the longest suddenly becoming this warrior, joining the blood rite, not having enough scenes with her sisters specifically Feyre and not getting a more in depth apology (Amren’s ass who didn’t even consider Nesta a friend and disrespected her like shit on a boot got a heartfelt apology from Nesta. ON HER MF KNEES. the hell did she do to deserve a better apology than Feyre, was saving her life supposed to replace proper apology dialogue? I guess so 🥴) suddenly knowing archery and it just made her look worse for doing nothing so what was it added to her for and after this long of no one mentioning she could do that? not even believably written, calling Elain a dog, suddenly being passionate about dancing, there being more smut than any Cassian growth or how it overshadowed the plot and proper relationship growth, disrespecting the honor of how and who joins and wins the Blood rite when with the Bat boys it was acclaimed to be so incredibly difficult and they just..won it with hiding “using logic that the men don’t” and magic bracelet manipulation by the queen as a cop out to give them Illyrian titles. I think she made Nesta’s friendship seem YA af too, they acted like middle schoolers in an…adult book. “let’s read smut hehehe” like what series am I reading? A bubble bath and baby Pegasus? Am I reading Percy Jackson or adult fantasy? Too many plot holes, retconning and just poor decisions that she apparently seems oblivious and careless about. Was the editor asleep and just let her write what she wanted to? Apparently yall 😵‍💫

I adore Elain and am worried I won’t like her growth or the way SJM writes her part of book…I’m expecting the same amount of girl bossing and smut as Nesta had no matter what we’ve known Elain to be like. I’m not saying she can’t be freaky but having her do too much does NOT fit her more modest personality. Because I know damn well she’ll write Az incredibly sexual probably even more so than his brothers considering his masterbaiting to even just a gift from Elain, MEDICINE for christs sake. Him being known to have secret lovers and SJM’s bestfriend hyping SJM up for super freaky Az? It’s going to be nasty in their book and let’s hope it makes sense and isn’t overdone like Nessian was and overshadowed proper growth and plot smh. Elain seems super secretive and I hope she doesn’t upset anyone and we have drama in the fandom over her.

All in all, SJM wrote a book I’ve never read so many inconsistencies or flaws in so yeah, I’m nervous that I’ll dislike Elain too. Feyre had the best damn trilogy and growth and I so badly want to love Elains but she seems to be writing worse now, even CC2 had a lot of cringe things, the oversexualization of Bryce and people claiming she’s meant to be a Queen when her maturity and communication and selflessness is barely there..

I went off 🥲 I’m sorry admin but so many people complain about this that imagine how cringe she can write Elain. I don’t even want to see her become a High Lady of Dusk like everyone so badly wants because…hy the hell would my girl become that? What has any other sister besides Feyre done to deserve their own court aside from being a Lady? I love Elain and can say that if she becomes a High Lady I will sell my book and only claim Feyre and leave fandom. This isn’t hate for Elain! that quick ass growth to a High Lady just makes no damn sense. Bring dusk back to life possibly that’d be exciting, heal it bring it back to life sure or do something to the prison but please SJM don’t make her a damn High Lady. That’s it..

i agree with everything you said. i hate it when they make acosf look like a decent book or as if nesta is sarah's most developed character when there are all these inconsistencies and sarah has managed to make the relationship between the sisters even worse.

all your concerns about elain are perfectly understandable. i'm also afraid that sarah's going to make a cheap, disgusting porn like she did in acosf, and that she'll ruin azriel like she did cassian. when we compare it with acosf, it's really scary. i hope she stays true to the personalities of both azriel and elain, as they both exude romanticism and affection and not just sexual energy (since, come on, nessian doesn't have the slightest romantic involvement and there's only sex in the book.)

i also find the oversexualization that sarah has with the characters disgusting and unnecessary. It's not empowering, it's just embarrassing. bryce definitely wasn't fit to be queen and it's not even the kind of development she's had. also, i don't think elain will become a high lady because that theory doesn't make sense and doesn't fit anywhere. helion is more alive than ever and i find it very difficult sarah to kill him for nothing.

my theory is that elain will discover herself as a seer, she will have to interact with azriel and do quests for night court while she makes her own decisions. i want to remain confident that sarah will respect the characters she has created and developed over the years and that it won't change everything.

[starfire-s]

here’s a list of the best, mediocre and worst kdramas i watched in 2020

no one asked for this but it’s happening because i have thoughts (also all opinions are my own if you disagree then get well soon i guess... no i’m kidding make your own posts about it don’t hate me please) ahsjsj anyways click to read a lengthy post and if you actually read the whole thing then thank you i hope you enjoy this wild ride! 

THE BEST KDRAMAS -

mystic pop up bar - this show had everything i ask from a kdrama literally i can name it all found family (to real family), well thought out characters, a mystery plot, special effects, soft romances that were well written, a happy ending! no show in 2020 even comes close to how good this one was! the writers literally guided you throughout the whole thing so you could come up with theories and didn’t do a ‘aha! gotcha’ thing where they want to prove the audience wrong but they wanted us to be right and satisfied! the worst part about the drama is that it’s still so underrated and people just brush it off as some random fantasy show but it’s so much more than that! 1000/10

flower of evil - who doesn’t want to see lee joon gi being the son of a serial killer, living with the name of a man who is in a coma, and hiding his real identity from his wife who is a detective? this show constantly had me at the edge of my seat on a weekly basis so the emotions i went through while watching this are unparalleled! the writers also did such a good job on writing a coherent story that made sense and tied up all the plot points in the end. just a really satisfying show to watch! 10/10

where your eyes linger - i literally bought a $8 viki pass to watch this show so it should tell you everything you need to know about how i feel ahsjsj the episodes were 10 minutes long but we got a good story with well written characters who got character development in a total of 80 minutes it’s insane! honestly it’s still hard to believe this show had rookie actors because they were just so emotive that you could feel all the happiness, sadness, yearning and pining! probably one of my fave kdramas this year because of the acting that i always constantly rewatch! would recommend 10/10

crash landing on you - okay so this drama was actually released on my birthday last year and it was a time in my life when i was going through a lot so maybe it’s the comfort this show provided me through that time this is why i have such a soft spot for it? like the romance was good, it was funny, there was found family, the nk soldiers were all softies, there were strong female leads, soft male leads!!! ahh!! no other show on this list made me think about the unification of south korea and north korea irl because i wanted se ri and jeong hyeok to be together 4ever! but the only issue i had with this show was the ending they gave seung jun if they didn’t do that i’d give this show a 10/10 but just for that they get a 9/10

psycho but it’s okay - this was one of those shows where you’re literally like ‘wow everyone here needs therapy’ but this show was amazing i loved the story telling and how each episode related to children’s book/fairytales! the writers also did a good job with how carefully they talked about mental health in depth without villainising their characters but actually tried to make the audience understand why they were this way which included all the side characters too who had a well thought out story in each episode! also the dynamic between moon young, kang tae and sang tae was everything to me the actors all did an amazing job portraying their characters, it truly was a healing drama. the only thing i didn’t like about this show was the whole plastic surgery plot with the mother like that was very far fetched but it provided drama so i’ll let it slide because the rest was amazing. this show is a solid 8.5/10

18 again - another underrated gem! who would’ve thought a remake of that zac efron movie could be this good!! lee do hyun stole this show for sure the way he portrayed his character and gave heart eyes to his kids (when he’s only 25 irl was the best thing i saw this year ahsjs) i loved the family dynamics in this show, i loved how it talked about what it’s like to be young parents and how society still think it’s taboo to be divorced! it’s a show that makes you laugh and cry at the same time and that’s why everyone should watch it! however, the biggest clown thing this show did to me though was that i got sls for the first time while watching a kdrama... hwang in yeop if u’re reading this i love u and u deserved better 🤡 that aside this show was a 8/10

itaewon class - i actually didn’t watch this drama as it was airing because i thought i wouldn’t enjoy the plot but when i watched it i binged the whole thing in 2 days and my biggest regret is i didn’t watch it sooner! everyone knows i have a soft spot for park seo joon since he’s my favourite actor i’ve literally watched all his dramas like he could star in the trashiest drama out there and i’d still watch it and be like wow (looking at she was pretty 👀) this show aside from the acting had one of the best revenge plots in a kdrama! just watching a character realistically hustle his way to reach the top while fighting the corrupt man whose son killed his father was so so satisfying to watch! however, the love triangle in this show was questionable idk what they were trying to do with that but it personally annoyed me! but still i’ll give this show a 7.5/10 because i enjoyed it a lot!

do you like brahms? - kim min jae and park eun bin.. that’s all you need to know about why this is a good kdrama! i’m usually not a big fan of melodramas and everyone knows i prefer rom coms but this show was just so perfectly melo that i loved all the angst and pain we got!! also just watching two introverted people awkwardly fall in love was amazing! the characters story arcs were also handled pretty well with song ah finally learning to speak up for herself and joon young learning to express how he truly feels! but... the love square? was probably the most annoying thing the rest in my opinion was nicely done! i know people had mixed feelings about the ending but i loved that after all the pain joon young and song ah went through they got a happy ending together! 7/10

find me in your memory - okay this show started off very slow and it was confusing at the start but as it progressed everything in the plot started to fall into place! i mean this show really took opposites attract to a new level where the male lead could remember every single detail from his life but the female lead had to forget some of her traumatic memories to help her cope with her life! they were also tied together through a mutual character who was a big part of their lives in a different way! just an interesting melodrama with interesting characters i liked it! and moon ga young... i love you queen!!! 7/10

THE MEDIOCRE KDRAMAS -

more than friends - was the storytelling in this show groundbreaking? no. was the acting decent? yes. also probably the main reason i stuck with this show until the end! i think we can all agree lee soo had the best character development on this show he started off as a bad boy who wore one ear stud to actually becoming a well liked character... who else did it like him? no one. also the chemistry between the mains was 🔥 but the second male lead was so annoying is there a opposite word for second lead syndrome because i had that for sure! i think the best part about this show was the people i watched it with on here... shoutout to the five of us ahsjsj also this show introduced me to a talented actor/singer like ong seong wu (y’all know my kpop knowledge is nonexistent so no i didn’t know he was in a band called wanna one) all in all a predictable show but i had fun watching it so 6.5/10

tale of the nine tailed - i didn’t actually watch this show i watched it through gifs and instagram posts ahsjsjs so am i qualified to talk about my opinion definitely no... will I talk about it anyways yes lmao. lee rang deserved better that’s all goodbye and take care. 5.5/10

start up - probably one of the most awaited opinions. y’all thought this would be in the worst kdramas section but i decided to give this show some rights. the show started off strong, lost it’s way after episode 6 and then the last episode gave me what i wanted so i have mixed feelings. the writing was not the best i think we can all agree, love triangle as a plot device? wow so groundbreaking 🤡 the characters on the other hand... i loved every single one of them i mean ship wars? i don’t know her. the show had a lot of potential that was wasted but we also got some cute moments between the characters so there was really no winning or losing with this show? but in all honesty you can’t put a talented cast together like this and then just decide to give the audience a mediocre plot but the writers did exactly that! i think i can redirect y’all to my ‘crimes this show committed’ post for a in-depth analysis. lastly nam do san was a GOOD and REFRESHING male lead and ji pyeong was also a GOOD and FUN second male lead!!! this show gave me the ugliest ship war ever that i was transported back to my high school tvd days so thank you for that!! but the cast was loveable and all had a lot of chemistry together so here’s a 5/10 maybe that's too generous but... i think the reason why i didn't enjoy watching this show as much was definitely because of the tag on here lmao

THE WORST KDRAMAS -

the king eternal monarch - i miss clowning this show so much. the amount of braincells i lost while trying to understand this plot... i should be compensated by the writers. however, woo do hwan was a treat to look at on a weekly basis... however the writers kept decreasing his screen time even though he had a dual role... make it make sense? and i cannot comment on the plot of this show because i still don’t understand anything? also in my opinion tae eul and lee gon were the most bland couple of 2020, there was no chemistry between them and there was just a random kiss in episode 5 and they randomly said i love you... where was the development? also lee gon was soooo boring and such a one dimensional male lead! literally all the side characters were so much more interesting and the cast was good... but this plot. 2/10

do do sol sol la la sol - i wanna fight the writer who decided that the plot twist on the show would be that jun is a minor? i had no expectations from this show but it looked cute and nonsensical but that plot twist made me run the other way so fast that i never looked back! just because jun is a boy they really thought this would be excused like lmao we all have critical thinking skills???? the clown behaviour. a solid 1/10

record of youth - i hate this show so much. imagine not utilising park so dam who just starred in the biggest oscar winning movie to her full potential. imagine just making her a love interest to park bo gum’s character in the year 2020. i watched it up until episode 6 and i kept waiting for her character to get development... but it never happened so i dropped this show. also this show featured the MOST useless love triangle i have ever seen in my life like what was the point? also park bo gum’s characters family was straight up annoying (minus the grandpa) but they got so much screen time like that should’ve been given to park so dam... also villainising a gay side character for no reason at all in the year 2020? this show was a waste of my time i want the 6 hours i spent watching this back. -100/10 

backstreet rookie - i watched one episode of this and literally wanted to rip my eyeballs out of my head. idk what ji chang wook was thinking when he signed this drama i think he lost his ability to read because that's the only reasonable explanation for why he chose to star in such a dumpster fire show! this show had a racist character... had a high schooler kiss an adult... sexist jokes... just the worst things you can think of in a drama... this show had it. i still can’t believe so many people watched this show to the point where it had better ratings than pbio... really made me question everyone’s taste? but sorry can’t relate my taste is excellent so here’s the rating this show actually deserves -1000/10

if you made it this far... thank you for reading. let’s continue to love some kdramas together and get clowned by others in 2021! looking forward to it 😅

[aqvarius]

With people comparing Namba and Matsunaga (both older, both have an ex which feels redundant plot wise, and having moments of being laid back but also stern), which of the two do you think is the better?(Though I'm not sure if rmd will go beyond the 2nd epilogue since all the backlash from LC and we'll probably never see any more character development from each guy)

hmmmMMMM okay so i still have thoughts about the future of rmd (which i’m still working on slowly to try and get all my Thoughts in order) pending for another ask BUT i actually still haven’t read namba’s adversaries so i feel like i can maybe make a decent comparison without namba having too much advantage

so matsunaga and namba are REALLY similar. the sad thing is that matsunaga’s history with his ex should tie into the plot but it really doesn’t (or rather the link between ex and the plot comes out of literally nowhere) unless you’ve read all the right heart scenes (i’m just presuming this, it might also come out of nowhere even if you’ve read all the heart scenes and also i don’t know which ones exactly bc i didn’t wanna spend any hearts on this route lol). 

CUT FOR BIG SPOILERS

i do actually think that matsunaga’s route had more potential to weave in some more complex themes but ultimately ended up being a bit more basic(?) in terms of its core message. while yes, it is groundbreaking for voltage for them to write a bi love interest, i felt the way they tackled sexuality in this route wasn’t the most thoughtful. i mean, for the patient to basically go nuts (honestly don’t even remember his name bc this route made so little impact on me and i didn’t enjoy it enough to save screenshots lol) and murder his ex because he chose to preserve his public image as a celebrity and date a woman just felt like (1) not the most thoughtful character construction for a non-straight character and (2) just a way to (dare i say tokenistically) shoehorn in matsunaga’s sexuality without making it a genuinely impactful part of his personality and the development of his relationship with the mc. 

for one, i have to reiterate that it really did come out of nowhere. most of the route focussed on matsunaga’s health issues (frankly unnecessary imo). for me it felt like the health issue thing was a way for matsunaga’s backstory (particularly in relation to kasumi) to be written in, and then the thing with his ex was the way for his character to relate somewhat to a seemingly unrelated case (the actual medical/patient case aspect of the route), but they honestly threw that in so last minute and it was such a passing thing as well? like i feel like matsunaga’s route and his character were developed more from the whole downplaying his health issues thing than his sexuality. however, because the climax of the route was about the patient going berserk, they kind of were like let’s diffuse this situation with a dramatic reveal about matsunaga’s sexuality and that GENUINELY felt like all that was used for. like all of the “getting closer” moments were related to his health issues or hanging out the pomeranian lol. 

also honestly the ways in which both the patient and the female patient dealt with the singer’s death was exactly the same (i.e. wanting to die bc what’s the point in living if he’s no longer there) so i didn’t really see the point of there being two of them aside from setting up for a more dramatic ~gasp the singer was bi~ moment which in itself was just a setup for a more dramatic ~gasp matsunaga is bi~ moment right at the end. i also felt like they could have addressed the idea of fear of social discrimination in a more nuanced and thoughtful way? essentially i wasn’t a fan of the whole “he was afraid of being in a publicly gay relationship with me so i killed him bc he broke up with me to be with a woman” thing. and in my opinion, matsunaga contributed NOTHING to that entire theme aside from just saying “i had a boyfriend and we broke up for the same reasons except i didn’t become a murderer” which like........ you could have used this opportunity to actually explore the pain and difficulty of needing to hide your relationship because of social taboo or being discarded because your partner chose public image over you rather than just write this character off as a vengeful gay ex vs the good bi guy (matsunaga who just accepts injustices like ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ que sera sera). i thought it would have been a stronger and more sophisticated story had they either focussed on either one theme or the other in this one route (health/life expectancy issues vs sexuality) instead of kind of having both be treated a little half-heartedly. the feeling i got was that the first step to getting closer (and i say this laughingly bc honestly the distance between them even after 30 chapters is GAPING) was the pomeranian and then the topic that gave their relationship a little more depth than “we’re just hanging out with your dog” was the revelation of his health issues. 

also the idea that people live on through your memories of them felt a little like... overdone/simple? or that it was lacking a more sophisticated engagement with the idea of death, legacy and memories. i’ve read school life shoujo manga that deals with that theme in a more interesting way. so for me, it felt a little ingenuine that it was treated by as a perspective or way of thinking about death that was like a mindblowing new way to look at life ahead, especially since the characters involved are in their 20s, not early teens. 

so anyway i think that matsunaga has potentially a deeper character? namba has more or less ‘healed’ or at least learnt to cope with his issues enough that you wouldn’t know anything is up but it’s clear that matsunaga still has a lot of personal issues to work through, so there was genuine potential to overcome some of that boss-subordinate power imbalance through having genuine connection between just humans or to develop him as a character whose prioritisation of others is maybe a flaw. i just think that they crammed so many things in that none of it really got addressed or developed properly lol.  

i will say that i find matsunaga is way less fun than namba? namba is more of a “my pace” kind of guy - he’s more random/eccentric which i enjoy. matsunaga’s persona is more just like a regular nice guy? you would NEVER find matsunaga just on the street in costume pretending to be a fortune teller for no reason but to give you random love advice? 

but on that same note, i definitely feel less chemistry between matsunaga and his mc compared to namba. maybe this is just bc i only read matsunaga’s normal ending in which she confesses and asks him out and he literally SAYS NO AND IT ENDS WITH HER GETTING REJECTED (and i’m p sure they still aren’t together even in the happy ending or the epilogue), but the whole time i feel like there was only ever a parent-child relationship between them. i never felt like matsunaga treated her any different than how he treats literally anyone else in the EICU. i actually think he treats kasumi the best out of everyone, including his mc. the weird thing is that rmd actually had way more time and potential - i mean they literally SET THE TWO CHARACTERS UP IN AN EXPLICITLY ROMANTIC CONTEXT and there was still NEGATIVE amounts of romantic chemistry??? HOW? namba and his mc literally were in a boss-subordinate dynamic the entire time and they still had more chemistry and genuine interpersonal connection without it feeling like the mc is a small pet vying for her owner’s attention the entire time while also somehow simultaneously trying to mother him? i’m not kidding when i say that namba and his mc are more fun in 10 chapters than matsunaga and his mc are in THIRTY.  

ALSO namba’s (consistent lol) berating of his mc makes sense with his character and the context and is justified every time because his mc is a thoughtless noob (but one with potential that he sees his old self in). on the other hand, matsunaga has one moment when he scolds his mc for... some reason... but because she’s supposed to be this superstar student, she doesn’t really make the mistakes that allow her those learning opportunities. and then matsunaga basically just lets her do whatever she wants re: dealing with patients.  

oh and also the plot of namba’s route is better. 

in short, matsunaga’s route had potential but i feel like the missed potential and the lack of thoughtfulness in cramming in too many themes and not making the most of them are huge negative factors. namba has a more fun character, there is SO much more romantic chemistry between him and his mc, the plot is better and more interesting and has a twist without it feeling forced, namba’s comments about his age/their age gap make more sense for his character, his sprite is more attractive (lmaoooo), the relationship development is more organic, even the moments of rejection feel both more earned and heartbreaking. tl;dr: namba wins

ALSO sorry it took me so long to reply!! i’m still half in and out of tumblr 

[winterisakillerwrites]

Imperfect Tense - Part Two

Title: Imperfect Tense

One Shot: 2/3

Character: Tom Hiddleston/OFC

Genre: Angst

Rating: M

Summary: Secrets are powerful things. They shape who we are and how we interact with others and with the world. Tom assumed his secret was safe and his life would remain as it ever was. He was wrong.

Authors Notes/Warnings: This was written for @mrs-captain-evans writing challenge. My prompt was the line: “what did I do wrong?”. This was supposed to be a much shorter piece but alas it sort of ran away with me. Much like Brave Face this story deals with the concept of cheating. Apparently I wasn’t done with this idea just yet. Thanks, again, to @redfoxwritesstuff who not only encouraged this but was a fantastic support throughout its writing.

Tom spent the next week in constant state of subterranean fear. He’d informed Luke of his initial result and knew that his publicist was just as anxiously awaiting the remaining as well. Tom had allowed himself to go through the motions; to smile and act as if nothing whatsoever was wrong, but he was a jumbled mess on the inside. Each time his phone rang he fought the urge to jump several feet in the air, as his heart pounded in his chest. If anyone noticed his anxiousness, and Tom was certain they had (how could they not?), no one had said a word. They smiled and laughed with him. And so he kept on keeping on for lack of anything else to do.

It was midafternoon on the seventh day when the clinic finally called with his remaining results. Tom had excused himself from set, grateful that it was not his scenes they were currently filming, and ducked into a quieter area of the studio. The call had been brief and the woman he’d spoken to had been warm but professional; they’d all come back negative. All but one. And his heart had frozen in his chest at that. Chlamydia. It was treatable, the woman from the clinic had assured. And easily so. He would need to be started on a course of Doxycycline twice a day for seven days and would need to continue to abstain from sexual activity until the course of antibiotics was completed. Simple and easy. He mumbled what he’d hoped was understanding and agreed to pick up his antibiotic as soon as possible.

Tom stood staring at his phone for several minutes after the call had ended; nausea and fear rushing over him in revolving waves. Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. Theoretically, he knew that of all the damned things he could have ended up with he’d gotten lucky, so fucking lucky, getting something that was easily treated. In the scheme of things, this wasn’t anything like the end of the world. But that did little to quell his panic. He’d been so fucking bloody stupid. And Molly…God, Molly would be there in a few days’ time…How could he ever hope to explain…?

“Hey Tom,” A quiet female voice cut through the silence of the room. His head automatically shot up, catching sight of one of the PA’s, clipboard in hand as she rounded the corner. “Sorry to interrupt but we need you back on set.”

He nodded his assent. “Be right there.”

Once she’d rounded the corner once more, Tom fired off a quick text to Luke asking him to arrange to have his prescription picked up and brought to back to his room. Not bothering to wait for a response, he quickly pocketed the phone and headed back towards set, trying to steel his mind to the task at hand. There were still several hours left and he needed to focus.

When Tom finally made it back to his room in the late evening, all he wanted to do was sleep. Between the early set calls and the constant stress he’d been under, Tom had been left feeling beyond drained. He scrubbed his hand over his face and dropped wallet and phone onto the night stand next to his bed. Sitting next to the room phone on the far bedside table was a white bag. Puzzlement crossed his features before understanding dawned.

He pushed himself back to his feet and padded towards the mini-fridge and grabbed a bottle of water. Opening the bottle, he made his way back towards the bed, grabbing the bag and pulling out the package of antibiotics. A quick read of the pharmacist instructions and two swallowed capsules later, Tom dropped his head back onto the pillow and let out a soft sigh. He was wide awake now and somehow doubted sleep would come anytime soon. But he had to try.

Molly’s flight arrived in the early afternoon two days later. Tom had been onset and had sent Luke to fetch her in his stead. He ignored the familiar stab of guilt as his eyes turned once more to the clock above the director’s chair. She would be clearing customs by now and he could clearly picture the look on her face when she saw Luke waiting for her and not Tom. He was such a fucking coward. He technically could have gotten the day off if he’d wanted. They had shot most of his scenes and, save for any needed pick-ups or reshoots, he was, for all intents and purposes, done. But the idea of facing Molly terrified him. Misdirecting the truth on the phone was one thing (as difficult as it had been to do so), but doing so face to face….That was entirely another.

And he needed to tell her, he knew that. Especially now. But not yet…He couldn’t do it yet. She’d be tired from the flight and anxious about the red carpet the following evening (while she’d done several smaller events with him…This would be her first major outing on his arm). To throw all of this on her now would be the height of cruelty. He couldn’t ruin this for her…Or risk a scene on the carpet, because such a thing would be a disaster which would be hard to explain away…Tom cursed himself for letting that thought even cross his mind. Selfish. God, he was so fucking selfish.

He’d gotten Luke’s text saying Molly was with him and they were heading back to the hotel at a touch after two in the afternoon just as the production had broken for lunch. Tom had taken to carrying the antibiotic with him as the hours on set were long and oftentimes unpredictable, so there would thankfully be little chance of her finding them and asking pointed questions he still wasn’t sure how to answer.

How did one even begin to explain the cluster fuck that was his current situation? ‘Well you see, darling, I got stupidly drunk and fucked some random woman in a bathroom at a club and didn’t wear protection and now I’ve got an STD, but don’t worry it’s completely curable. And I know you’re undoubtedly cross with me but I still love you.’ That would go over just as well as a lead balloon. Letting Luke know that he would probably be wrapping up in about an hour, Tom made his way back onto set after a hastily grabbed sandwich and threw himself into work.

The cab pulled to a stop in front of his hotel at fifteen after three and Tom made his way up to his room, making a great effort to steady his nerves and to control his face. The last thing wanted to do was scare or worry her. Not yet. He pushed the door to his room open and had barely let it close behind him when she was in his arms. He let out a grunt of surprise, the shock of her warmth against his chest, and wrapped his arms around her to steady them both.

“God, I missed you,” she breathed into his neck.

Tom swallowed thickly, the guilt choking him now. It took several moments before he could force the words out of his lips. “Missed you too.”

Molly pulled back enough to take in his face and her own broke into a warm smile. Without a word, she leaned in and kissed him gently. He didn’t move to deepen the kiss and, after several moments, she pulled back to study him, puzzled. “Tom, are you alright?” Curiosity and concern burned in the depths of her eyes, making them shine a vivid, dark blue and burning the life out of him.

He took several steps back, stepping deftly from her embrace, and shrugged. “I’m find. Just tired. It’s been a long morning.” He held his hand out to her and she took it tentatively. He squeezed her fingers in his and added, “I’m sorry I couldn’t get you today. There wasn’t any way I could get away.”

There was a sliver of doubt in her eyes but she simply nodded. “I know. You’re here now and that’s what matters.”

Tom nodded, “I’m here now.” Silence fell between them. “So,” he started, raising his eyes to hers, and offering what he hoped was a warm smile. “What would you like to do?”

“Honestly, sleep,” She laughed softly.” God I would love nothing more than to just sleep. But I doubt very much that it would help me acclimate to this time zone if I did.”

“No, probably not.” Tom answered with a small chuckle of his own. It sounded hollow to his own ears.

“Damn.” Molly yawned, pulling her hand from his and stretching her arms above her head. “I guess that massive amounts of caffeine will have to suffice. So know any good coffee shops?”

“I think I can find us one. Shall we?”

They settled in a small, locally owned coffee shop not a terrible distance away from the hotel and talked pleasantly over their coffees. They talked about work, about what was happening with friends and family, and any small thing which popped into their heads. He was both grateful and terrified to have her so close. He had missed her dreadfully, god if he could have only seen her sooner then maybe none of this…He refused to let himself even finish the thought. This was in no way, shape, or form her fault. It was his. No one’s fault but his own.

After they had finished their coffees he’d taken her on a short walk around the city. She’d gladly taken his arm and let him tell her about the small tidbits of knowledge he’d gathered from both his own wonderings and from crew and fellow cast members. The weather was fair and for that short amount of time, Tom let himself pretend that all was well between them. That he wasn’t putting off breaking her heart and the very real possibility he’d lose her forever once he did so.

Dinner was a quick affair in the hotel restaurant. It was close, the food was decent, and Tom knew that Molly was dreadfully tired. She’d commandeered the shower not long after they’d arrived back at the room from dinner, stating that she’d planned to turn in early. While she had puttered around the rather large bathroom, Tom pulled his antibiotic bottle from the carryall he’d taken to bringing with him on set. He fished another bottle of water from the fridge and poured out two capsules into his opened palm.

He’d just tossed the capsules into his mouth when the bathroom door opened and Molly wandered out, dark hair wrapped in a towel and dressed in a loose fitting t-shirt and jogging bottoms. He nearly choked on both water and capsules, ending up in a violent coughing fit. “Bathroom’s all yours…Tom are you alright?”

Tom nodded, clutching his chest which felt very much like it was on fire. “Yes,” he managed to get out, voice hoarse from coughing. “Pills didn’t go down the right way.” He grimaced as he realized just what he’d said. Shit.

Molly’s brow furrowed, “Pills?” She hurried towards the bed and before Tom could stop her she’d grabbed the bottle, staring at it. He’d scratched out all the identifying information including his name and the reason the medication was prescribed as soon as he’d gotten the bottle; there was no such thing as too careful as far as he was concerned. She flitted her eyes to him, concerned. “Why are you taking antibiotics? What’s happened?” It was truly something, watching her slip into what he’d always affectionately called ‘nurse mode’ and normally Tom found it endearing if not a bit overwhelming. Now though, now it flooded him with fear. God, why had he fucking spoken without thinking?

He took the bottle from her and placed it onto the bed stand. He wracked his brain trying desperately to think of what to say. He knew without a doubt what he should say was the truth. Lying would only make it harder to tell her the truth. But the idea of telling her, of actually saying the words aloud terrified him. She would storm out. She would leave him. And he couldn’t let that happen. He needed her. Needed her so badly.

“You know how I’ve been off for the past week or so?” He found himself speaking, his voice surprisingly even. “I went to a clinic because I knew something wasn’t right. They ran a few tests and turns out I had a rather nasty bout of strep throat. So they started me on antibiotics.” The lie flowed far easier than he could have imagined. And once it was out, he couldn’t take it back.

Her brow furrowed. “Why is the label all scratched out?”

“Privacy,” he answered, with a small shrug. The words continued to come and he hated himself for them. “It’s fairly standard here to do that. In case it gets misplaced. I thought it odd too but…”

Molly looked anything but convinced but did not press the matter. After several minutes she pondered aloud, “I wonder why they prescribed you Doxycycline. That’s not usual…Or at least not that I’ve seen.”

Tom shrugged, “I don’t know. I was just grateful to have a reason for why things have been so off.”

“Why didn’t you tell me this earlier? When I asked?” The concern was back in her tone but this time laced with just the barest hint of doubt.

He swallowed before answering. “I didn’t want you to worry. I know you’ve got so much going on right now and I was loath to add anything more on your shoulders.” Tom smiled at her softly, hoping to ease her growing concern. “But I’m fine. No harm, no foul.”

“Tom,” she chastised, “You should have told me. Yes, work is a bit hectic, but I’m not made of glass. You can talk to me. You should have talked to me.” Molly paced around the room, standing just out of his reach. He could so easily sense her hurt at his perceived slight. Not so perceived, he thought bitterly. Pretty damned real.

“I know. I was stupid and I’m sorry. Can you forgive me?” His forced himself to lock his eyes on hers. Please, please can you ever forgive me for what I’ve done? I need you to forgive me. Tom hated himself for thinking it, for asking for something he knew he’d not earned the right to.

“Tom…” She took a deep breath and walked back towards him and the bed. “It’s alright. Just please talk to me. I love you and I worry, you know that.” Molly took his hand in hers, linking their fingers.

A watery smile spread slowly across his face as he squeezed her hands in his. “I love you, too. So very, very much.” Molly settled beside him on the bed and leaned her head on his shoulder, turning to press a kiss against it. “I am sorry,” he continued, trying desperately to keep himself in check but needing her to know just how terribly sorry he really was. Even if he couldn’t tell her why. “Truly, I am.”

“I know,” she whispered, kissing his shoulder once more. “It’s done, Tom. Now let’s try to get some sleep. It’s been a ridiculously long day and I don’t know about you but I am utterly exhausted.”

Tom nodded and kissed her the top of her head. “Alright. To bed with you then.”

Molly pulled herself from his grasp and climbed towards the left hand side of the bed, burrowing beneath the covers. Tom pushed himself to his feet, fighting the feeling of guilt the churned in his gut, and stumbled into the bathroom. He quickly brushed his teeth and scrubbed his face, taking a deep breath before returning to the main room. He pulled his shirt over his head and toed off his boots. Pulling a pair of pajama bottoms from the chair in the corner, he quickly changed and headed back towards the bed. He found himself hesitating as he approached, his guilt warring with the desperate need of normalcy. Molly turned over and patted the spot behind her. “Come here you.” He offered a small smile before climbing into the bed and flipping the light off behind him.

Sleep came easier than he’d expected and he found himself waking in confusion the next morning, feeling the warm body pressed against him. Tom cracked open first one eye and then the other, Molly’s sleeping form slowing coming into focus. She was there, he hadn’t dreamt it, and for a brief moment a flood of contentment overwhelmed him. Then reality came crashing back. He fought the urge to volt himself out of the bed, it would raise more questions and concern than he could honestly handle.

He watched her for several moments; the way her dark hair spread over the pillow beneath her, having come out of its braid sometime in the night, the way her eyelashes brushed against her cheeks, the peaceful look on her beautiful face. He didn’t deserve her. Not in the slightest. And if she knew…

“What are you staring at so hard?” Molly’s sleep laden voice broken Tom from his thoughts. He blinked rapidly and looked down to find her warm, blue eyes staring up at him in confusion.

“Sorry,” he murmured. “Just lost in thought. Did you sleep well?”

She nodded and stretched her arms above her head as a large yawn rolled from her lips. “God, sorry. But yes, I slept like the dead. Nothing like jetlag, eh?” Tom laughed despite himself. “What time is it anyway?”

Rolling to the side, Tom grabbed his watch from the bed stand. “Half eight. We’ve got about three hours until the madness descends.” Luke had sent him a text the day before confirming that his stylist (and that was still strange) and someone from hair and make-up would be coming around at about noon to get both he and Molly ready for the premiere.

Molly quirked an eyebrow. “Three hours, eh? Plenty of time for all sorts of fun.” She leaned up and kissed him. He allowed himself to be pulled into the kiss, missing the feel of her warmth in his arms. And suddenly it was as if he’d been doused in ice water. Realization as to just why he couldn’t do this. Fuck. With reluctance he pulled back, taking in the concern was steadily growing in her eyes. “Tom what…?”

“I just…I’m still not 100% and I don’t want to risk you getting sick because of me.” It was the truth, in none so many words, but he hated himself for speaking them. “Why…Let me take you to breakfast? Somewhere nice? After all if you’re in LA you might as well see what all the fuss is about.”

He climbed out of bed and made a hasty retreat into the bathroom, stopping briefly to grab a change of clothing along the way. He didn’t dare look back at Molly. Once dressed, Tom made his way back into the main room to find Molly dressed as well. She didn’t utter a word as she brushed past him and into the bathroom. Shit. Shit. Shit.

Tom hated himself for all of this and desperately wanted to her so. But he couldn’t tell her why. Not now. The stark realization made his gut clench. He couldn’t tell her. The time for that had come and gone. He’d told too many half-truths and blatant lies to have any hope of ever coming clean. The best he could hope for now was to put all of this behind him as much he was able. And then to work has hard as he could to make himself worthy of her in future.

The elevator ride down to the lobby of the hotel was spent in silence and Tom swore he could hear the frantic beating of his heart against his chest. He’d be surprised if Molly couldn’t hear it as well. She did however let him take her hand as they made their way from the hotel and down the relatively crowded streets. The small café was about a five minute walk from the hotel and by the time they’d been seated, Molly seemed to have relaxed enough to speak with him again. They made small talk over plates of egg, bacon, and pancakes (something he’d insisted she have because they were ‘utterly divine’). She smiled as he told her how he’d stumbled across this place not too long after he’d arrived and how he’d had to make a conscious effort to avoid it most days so he wouldn’t eat his weight in delicious food on a daily basis.

By the time they’d returned to the hotel it was nearly noon. At twelve on the dot madness did in face arrive. The next several hours were spent in a whirlwind of clothing, hairspray, pins, and makeup. His suit had taken little time to fit and his make-up and hair even less but having these people on hand for Molly (who had always dressed herself and done her own makeup and hair for those few events she’d attended with him) was something he’d desperately wanted.

She was a vision in a deep blue off the shoulder dress than hung just past her knees. It clung to her curves and enhanced her eyes in the most striking fashion. Her hair was piled effortlessly atop her head and her makeup was subtle but stunning. She looked gorgeous and Tom couldn’t seem to take his eyes off her. “You look utterly enchanting,” he told her with complete and transparent honesty.

Molly smiled softly back at him. “Thank you. I feel…This is so…Odd. Brilliant, but odd.” She twirled slowly before the mirror, smiling softly to herself as she did so.

Tom nodded in understanding. His phone chimed in his pocket, he pulled it out to find the car hired to take them to the theater had arrived. He shoved it back into his pocket and held his hand out to Molly. “Our chariot awaits. Shall we, my love?”

She nodded, taking his hand and allowing him to lead her from the room and down to the lobby and the waiting car.

The crowd outside the theater was far larger than Tom had expected. It was nothing like he’d ever experienced and it was nearly overwhelming. He could feel Molly’s tight grip on his hand as they climbed from the hire car and slowly made their way down the carpet. Luke flitted around beside them, causally directing Tom where to go and who to talk to. The flashes were blinding and the noise was overwhelming. Tom spoke graciously with reporter after reporter, laughing at their jokes and sharing small tidbits about filming with them. He’d proudly called Molly his girlfriend when asked but did not reveal more detail than was needed. And she stood beside him, smiling and leaning against him.

Once they’d made their way inside, Molly and Tom were ushered into the theater and to their seats. The lights dimmed and the film began. Molly gushed at how much she’d enjoyed the film on their way towards the after party; going on about the script and Tom’s acting and her favorite scenes. She’d clearly been having the time of her life and Tom couldn’t have be happier for it, for her. They’d drank and danced and generally had a wonderful night of it, stumbling back towards the hotel in the early hours.

The next morning dawned far too early for either of their likings. Molly’s flight was scheduled for early in the afternoon and they’d reluctantly set alarms accordingly. Neither had drunk to access the night, and well into the early morning, before but weren’t quite in fighting shape either. Molly had unpacked little upon her arrival which made life infinitely easier. Still it was a scramble to get the last minute bits and bobs squared away. Tom had given her one of his sweater jackets for the flight home. She’d accepted it gratefully and climbed into the waiting taxi. He’d quickly kissed her goodbye and assured her that he’d be home within the next week. Two at the most.

He’d thrown himself into finishing up his commitments, wanting to be done with LA and the mess he’d made there. Molly had been set to text him when she’d landed so when that time had come and gone without a word, a sinking sense of dread filled him. He told himself it was nothing, she’d most likely been tired and had been set on getting herself home and settled. She would call after, he had to believe that.

When his phone rang early the following morning he’d felt his heart lighten at sight of her name on the screen. “You’ve made it home then. I was worried.”

“Tom,” Molly began. “I need you to tell me the truth.”

He felt his heart stutter in his chest. “Mols, what…What’s going on?”

“I found something in your pocket. In the jumper you gave me.” His heart thudded in his chest and the blood rushed in his ears. Something was wrong. Very, very wrong. “Tom who is Heather?” Molly asked. Her voice was strangely even and it took everything he had to keep from dropping the phone.

“What?” He managed to choke out.

“Her name and number were in your pocket. On a cocktail napkin.” Molly’s words were cool, even. “Tom, I need you to explain this to me.”

Panic flooded through him. Oh god, how could he have left that stupid napkin in his fucking pocket? He hadn’t thought about it since she’d placed it into his hand that night. Hadn’t spared a thought for what he’d done with it. How the bloody hell could he have kept it? And then fucking given it to Molly? “It’s nothing, I promise you. I honestly had no idea that was even in there. I must have been given it by a fan sometime and hadn’t had a chance to give it to Luke to throw away. I would never…” The lies spilled from his lips rapidly though his voice was surprisingly even and calm, despite the chaos rampaging through him. “You know me, Molly.” Liar. Liar! You bloody fucking coward of a liar!

There was hesitation on her end and it was several moments before she spoke again. “I just…with the way you’d been acting and then the prescription and now the number…I was so scared that you…”

“Molly…” He started, fighting to keep his voice even.

“But I know you, Tom. And I know you’d never…I just…I saw it and I panicked. I’m sorry. God, I don’t know what’s wrong with me.” Her voice was trembling and he knew she was close to tears. The guilt was overwhelming but still…

“You’ve done two transatlantic flights in a short amount of time. That’s bound to make anyone on edge. You are alright, Molly. It’s okay. I love you.” He was the worst sort of person. A liar and a bloody coward. But he couldn’t…Not now…He couldn’t tell her now. “I’ll be home soon and we’ll be back on our feet soon enough. I’ve got a small bit of time off and we’ll do something…We’ll do something, just you and I.”

Molly laughed softly and he could hear the tears in her voice as she spoke. “That honestly sounds wonderful, Tom.”

They’d spent a weekend in Paris upon his return home. They’d spoken often of wanting to go but never seeming to have the time. He’d surprised her with the Eurostar tickets and booking information for a lovely bed and breakfast not far from the city center as soon as he’d walked in the door. She’d laughed then and pulled him tightly into her arms, kissing him soundly. They’d spent their time there wandering the city by day; visiting museums and restaurants, taking in all Paris had to offer, and then reacquainting themselves with each other by night. He’d been attentive and wonderful and so much as he had been in those first few days of their relationship; when everything was bright and new and full of endless potential.

He’d made it a point from then on to make the effort to come to her as often as he could while away and, if that wasn’t feasible, to bring her to him whenever possible. There were stumbling and false starts along the way, but they seemed to eventually get find the balance they’d needed to make things work between them. And it was just as well since his career began to skyrocket in ways neither he nor Molly had dreamed. She’d been with him every stop along the way, proudly standing beside him; still nervous and unsure but there holding his hand and ever beaming with pride in him and all he was becoming.

Molly had been with him when he’d purchased his home in London six months later; a lovely three story terraced house nestled near a large park in a grand neighborhood. Tom had insisted she come with him as it would be her home just as much as his and he needed her to be comfortable and happy with his choice. With their choice.

Within four months of moving in, Tom had proposed. It had been a small and simple affair (she had never been one for grand gestures); he’d taken the day to prepare a lovely meal and decorated the lower level of the house with dozens upon dozens of candles. The ring securely stored in his trouser pocket, he’d greeted her at the door and led her into the flickering light of the dining room.

She’d watched him with surprised and uncertain eyes as he led her to the table and poured her a glass of wine. “To what do I owe this surprise?” She’d managed to ask after settling her nerves with a restorative sip.

Tom smiled at her then, eyes warm and full of love, “Can’t I just spoil you?”

Molly quirked her eyebrow and shot him a knowing look but said nothing, only smiling in return. They ate their meal, peppering the moments between bites with conversation. He was nearly vibrating out of his chair by the time they were ready for coffee and dessert and he knew she could sense it. He could feel her eyes on him as he disappeared into the kitchen and returned carrying a tray laden with coffee press, mugs, and cake. He made quick work of serving both cake and coffee but did not return to his seat at the table.

She raised her eyes to his, her voice catching in her throat as she whispered his name in confusion. “Tom?”

Taking a deep breath, he lowered himself to one knee. Molly’s sudden intake of breath echoed above him. He took a moment to compose himself before raising his head and looking her directly in her shining face. “Molly, you are without a shadow of a doubt the most amazing, wonderful thing that has ever happened to me. I will never understand just how I ever became lucky enough to have you in my life.” He felt his throat tighten with emotion, forcing him to pause long enough to try to clear it enough to continue. “You are not only my rock but the cord that tethers me to myself. You are everything I have ever wanted. Everything I have ever needed. And everything I never dreamed I could have. I will spend every single remaining day of my life doing my utmost best to be worthy of the love you’ve shown me. I will never, ever take you for granted and I will love you with all that I am.” Tears were stinging his eyes as he spoke, holding the velvet box out towards her. “Will you do me the extraordinary honor of being my wife?”

Molly smiled and nodded, tears flowing steadily from her eyes as she extended her left hand to him. Tears shining in his own, Tom opened the box reveling the beautiful sapphire ring he’d spent months searching for nestled within. He took her shaking hand in his and with slow and deliberate care slipped the ring onto her finger. Laughing, she pulled him against her and kissed him deeply.

Tom pulled back, tears trailing down his cheeks and locked his eyes with hers. “Thank you,” he whispered before pulling her against him once more and burying his face in her abdomen. “Thank you.”

The announcement was released in the Times a few days later, shortly after both had broken the news to their respective families. Tom’s sisters had shrieked loud enough frighten all the dogs in the greater London area and Molly’s mother had broken into tears (“Happy tears my love,” she’d assured her. “He’s a truly wonderful lad and I’m so very, very happy for you both”) which had sent Molly into them as well.

Wedding planning had taken up more of her time that Molly had expected. What had seemed like a simple affair with close friends and family was rapidly becoming anything but. And the stress of it was starting to take its toll. Exhaustion and bouts of nausea had taken turns disrupting her life Between the wedding and the ever changing shifts she’d been forced to adopt, Molly wasn’t sure she would make it the six months until the wedding.

Tom had done all he could to help; spending as much time as he could on the phone with caterers and florists while juggling script readings and auditions. He’d done everything in his power to help shoulder the burden he knew the wedding prep had placed on his fiancée’s shoulders. But when promotional duty called and Tom was pulled back into the fray his professional life had become, it was with a weary reluctance Molly let him go.

“This is going to be the death of me,” She whined as Tom dropped his suitcase by the door.

He offered her a warm smile. “I don’t care where it happens, my love. All I care about is that it happens. We can simply go to the registrar’s office and call it a day.” He laughed when she wrinkled her nose at that. “Or we can go all out. That is not the important thing for me. I just want to be able to call you my wife.”

Tears streamed down Molly’s cheeks and she worked to quickly wipe them away while swatting absently at him. “God, Tom. Why are you so bloody perfect? It’s exhausting.” She laughed softly. “I’m going to miss you.”

He leaned in and kissed her soundly, hands moving to tangle in her dark hair. “I’m going to miss you desperately as well. But I will be back as soon as I can, Luke and everything be damned.”

She laughed against his lips. “Can I be a fly on the wall when you tell him that?”

Tom laughed in earnest and pulled her tightly against him, burying his face in her hair. “I really wish I didn’t have to go.”

“Me too. But duty calls.” Molly took a deep breath and pulled reluctantly back, squeezing his shoulders. “Go on, you’ve got reporters to charm and fans to dazzle. Just don’t you go forgetting about me.”

Tom shook his head vigorously. “Never happen.”

Outside the honk of a car horn echoed. Molly brushed tears away with the back of her hand. “Looks like your ride is here.” She smiled warmly. “Take care, Tom. I love you.”

He leaned in and kissed her soundly once more. “I love you too. Be home as soon as I can.”

Tom reluctantly pulled away as the car horn sounded again. He kissed her forehead and strode with purpose to the door, grabbed his suitcase, and headed out to the waiting car.

“It’s true then, isn’t it?” Molly’s voice was quiet, even, and it brought Tom crashing back into the present. His eyes locked on hers in silent panic; her question had knocked him completely off his guard.  He watched her then; the solid set of her shoulders, the stillness of her body speaking volumes of just how much his lies and silence had cost him.

“Wha…? No! NO!” The words tumbled from his lips, the denial almost reflexive. But it was too late and he’d known it.

Molly shook her head. “Tom, you look as though you’ve seen a ghost…So please don’t…Don’t lie to me.” Her blue eyes rose to lock with his, daring him to deny it. To deny what they both knew was true.

“Mols, please…You know me…You know I would never…” The ease in which the lies poured from his lips sickened him. But he hadn’t been thinking; panic driving his words, his actions. He couldn’t lose her. Not now. But it was no use and he’d known it. Molly knew the truth, knew what he had done, and nothing he could say or do now would be able to change it.  

“No, Tom, I don’t.” There was a sadness to her voice that nearly shattered his heart. “Not anymore…A week ago, I would have never, ever believed you would do this…But now…” her voice trailed off and she swallowed thickly before raising her gaze to his once again. With a slow and deliberate care, she twisted the ring, his ring, from her finger. “Take the test, Tom. Sort out your life.”

She offered him a soft smile that didn’t quite reach her eyes before pushing herself to her feet and placing the still warm ring into his hand. She took a deep breath and, gathering her suitcases, walked quietly out of the front door.

The door closed behind her with definite click that Tom felt in his bones. She was gone. He couldn’t process it, couldn’t allow himself to accept it.

He wasn’t sure how long he stood in the center of the living room, staring with a waning hope at the closed front door. Molly was gone. He’d been stupid and selfish and now it had all come back on him ten-fold. His eyes burned but the tears he knew were there refused to come. He took a shuddering breath and rubbed his hand over his mouth, trying to calm his racing thoughts and his thudding heart. He needed to change, needed to call Luke. Needed to do something other than simply stand there and watch his life crash and burn.

Tom climbed the stairs slowly, his mind set on showering, hoping that the hot water would help him gather his thoughts. Help him figure out what the fuck he was going to do. The bedroom door was ajar and the room within unnaturally quiet and dark. He flipped on the light switch and stood staring at the chaos before him; the closet and dresser drawers pulled open, their contents having been quickly removed, the bedding crumpled. Molly had been a stickler about making the bed and making sure the room was tidy. She’d told him off more than once for the mess he’d always seemed to make of their room, and wouldn’t let him rest until he’d set it right. Seeing the room now in such disarray was jarring.

He took a deep breath and shook his head to clear his thoughts, wandering from the bedroom into the ensuite bathroom, pulling his shirt over his head. He froze mid movement, his shirt slipping from his hands and onto the floor, as his eyes landed on a small piece of elongated plastic laying on the counter beside a soft yellow envelope. His blood pounded in his ears as he took two shaky steps to the counter, his fingers clumsily picking both items up.

Wordlessly, he turned the test over in his hands. Its display screen read ‘PREGNANT’ in bold, black letters. He blinked in confusion, hands shaking harder. He wasn’t conscious of moving back into the bedroom, of falling unceremoniously onto the bed. He dropped the test beside him on the light blue coverlet and turned his attention back towards the yellow envelope. It took several tries to break the seal. And when he did he slowly pulled the card inside out, staring at it in stunned disbelief. The bright green, handwritten lettering across its front seemed to taunt him. ‘Congratulations, Daddy! We’re going to have a baby!’

A strangled sob fell from Tom’s lips as the card tumbled from his numb fingers and onto the floor.

Next

[ryumako]

so I’ve mentioned it before but I started watching bnha soon after 7/15, because it was my birthday and I had gotten on tumblr and saw that it was also Deku’s birthday.

Sharing a birthday wasn’t the actual reason I started watching it, it was more so the fact that I was a) already trying to choose another (specifically shounen) anime to watch and b) had seen so so much bnha on tumblr, especially on that day, and I figured I might as well get in on it (I didn’t even know season 4 was coming out soon and in hindsight I’m so glad I caught up because tumblr goes fucking buck wild for bnha as any season of it comes out and it doesn’t matter who you follow, no one is safe)

but yeah, I’ve currently got about 60 anime on my plan-to-watch list and bnha wasn’t even Fucking One Of Them (but that’s just how it goes, isn’t it)

I was very indifferent about it at first, but even then I was still thinking about it when I wasn’t watching it. I had a lot of questions (that eventually got answered). There were things that rubbed me the wrong way (subtle and not-so-subtle fetishy stuff, how the female characters are treated/written, Mineta existing at all, etc. But like. I find a lot of shounen anime to be this way. Doesn’t excuse them, but I make my Disgusted™ face and soldier on). But there were also a lot of things I liked. It’s funny, the animation and art style (especially the manga’s) is really cool, and I fell for most of the characters immediately.

For a while, it was just something for me to watch on the train. And I don’t know when it happened, but eventually I liked it so much that I could no longer watch it on the train because I would be visibly reacting to scenes. Didn’t matter much anyway, I caught up in about 9 days (would have been shorter, but I had a full time job at the time).

Anyway, I got distracted from the series because a couple weeks later I was dumped and then fired (yikes) and had to move from Denver to Kansas. Still, I was looking at fan art during the whole 7 hour drive.

I wanted to read the manga, but I’ve never read a manga this long. I wanted to make sure I had the Time and the Energy. I ended up starting it on August 29th and caught up with it 3 days ago on the 7th. I have yet to read Vigilantes or Smash!! but I’m getting to it

I started the manga for 2 reasons

a) Season 4 in just a month!! I wanted to know what I’m in for

b) I needed to figure out the hype around certain characters. I am hyper aware of the fact that tumblr latches on to characters so hard to the point where it doesn’t even make sense and they end up mischaracterizing them. I wanted to accurately Form my Opinions.

I’m the type to usually have the main character or someone close to the main character as my favorite (um if that wasn’t already blatantly fucking obvious lmao) and it’s because they almost always have the most character development/detailed backstory! That isn’t to say that I can’t infer things about the more minor characters, it’s just that usually they’re much less interesting/developed anyway. Bnha is overwhelming because there are several lovable characters.

But yeah, after watching the anime and having not yet read the manga, I was having a lot of trouble understanding the hype around: Mirio (based on what you see in the anime, he didn’t really have a personality yet, just POWERRRR and a cool-ass quirk, but don’t get me wrong, I love him now! He’s super admirable and really interesting. I also love his interactions/relationship with Deku!)

Kirishima (he seemed like a generic supporting character to me. He was really funny the whole anime, but I failed to see why he was so popular. After reading his backstory and watching him overcome his shortcomings, watching him frame himself in such a realistic way, etc, I loved him! His character design is really, really cool, and he’s a super lovable guy. You want to be his friend. Definitely the kind of character I can’t imagine anyone hating.)

Todoroki (out of the characters I list here, I understood this hype the most, because a decent amount of his backstory/character is already revealed in the anime. But people fucking LOVE Todoroki. I saw him more than any other character on my dashboard, even before I consumed the series and followed bnha blogs. I was like yeah, he’s cool and interesting, but is he that cool and interesting? The answer is yes! Todoroki is a very mature, clever, multi-faceted in depth character and he’s also fucking hilarious. Also, his quirk? Hell yes!)

and then Bakugo.

Um

I still don’t understand the Bakugo hype. I like his character design (his Japanese VA is perfect, like what a fucking voice, he probably can’t even speak after recording), I like that his existence motivates Deku, and some of the things he says make me laugh out loud

But like, I cannot humanize him, and I cannot understand the hype. I was really really hoping the manga would help me Understand the Hype but it didn’t really?

Listen,

Horikoshi basically said ‘I was going to make Bakugo an actual character with human emotions besides anger, I was going to give him empathy, I was going to make him not wholly self-absorbed, I was going to give him a personality besides that of a wet house cat,

but look at him! Look into his eyes! There is nothing there. Only anger.’

Or rather, he literally calls him “explosively rotten and detestable”.

BUT RACHE, what about when he brought Deku aside to talk about his quirk? What about that one time he showed a single scrap of softness?

Okay I’ll give you one thing - he did finally show an emotion that wasn’t just anger (even though he was still angry the whole time). We learned that Bakugo can feel Regret. But also…was that whole thing not only just about him?

It was ’I feel guilty about being the catalyst that ended All Might’s career’

’I need to fight Deku to prove myself, despite his initial protests’

’I need to break the school’s rules and get both of us in trouble because I can’t handle my own feelings’

He was only thinking about himself the whole time, so I don’t really put much stock in that argument. I was surprised that he agreed to keep the existence of One for All a secret, and I still believe it was totally out of character for him to do so, but the alternative would cause the unraveling of the entire story, so.

Upon reading the manga, I found one (1), one scrap of hope. And if you’ve read the manga, you probably know what I’m talking about, because it was kind of a big deal to people.

He said that. I actually gasped when I read it. I really couldn’t believe it (oh the bar is so low though)

THIS was a really good example that Bakugo has feelings somewhere. And believable, too! It didn’t come off as out of character for a couple reasons -

a) He is saying it to a child he will likely never see again. He would never say this within earshot of a classmate (Todoroki, Yoarashi, and Camie were all adequately distracted) and if god forbid Deku were to ever hear that from him, he would backpedal so fast he’d get whiplash. But yeah, of course he’d never say anything like that around anyone that matters.

b) The setting. He’s actively in the remedial classes, where he can only be hyper-aware of his failures and shortcomings, whether he likes it or not. This line/scene occurs rather far into the manga. He hasn’t gotten anywhere and he fucking knows it. Every time he makes a move or has a chance, it backfires. He’s starting to realize his self-absorption alone is holding him back and this line is a hint that maybe, maybe he’ll change

but will Horikoshi write that? I have trouble picturing him doing that, and if Bakugo does change, it is going to take a really

really

long time. I know a lot of fans have the patience to see it happen, I suppose I do now as well, but I suspect casual fans won’t.

In a way, I am a little obsessed with Bakugo just because you all are. I’m always trying to understand the psychology. I’m not trying to insult anyone who does have the impulse to humanize him (some of you though…SOME of you DEFINITELY go too far) because again, his character design is cool, his quirk is cool, and he can be funny at times (albeit not at all clever).

I will definitely be here for the seemingly unattainable dream chapter in which he apologizes to Deku. I can’t even imagine it…

I’m a little annoyed at myself now, because Deku is my favorite character but I simply don’t have much to say. I just wrote a goddamn Bakugo Essay but I don’t have much to say about Deku. He’s one of the most motivational and relatable characters I’ve ever come across. Call him a generic shounen protag all you want, but I love him. If it were 2012 and kin was still a thing (and I had That Type of Brain) I’d be hard pressed to find a better kin candidate (born on Jul 15? infp? Bullied mercilessly yet resilient? Sweet as fuck? Same god damn hat Deku). He’s adorable, funny, nerdy, and ferocious. That boy goes absolutely feral on his opponents/enemies and you love to see it. 

But anyway, yeah! Bnha fucking rocks and I don’t give a fuuuck if it’s associated with cringe culture. “Cringe culture” is cringe culture. I was telling my brother about how the plot is dummy simple, so I can see how people think it’s overrated. However, it’s hard not to love the characters, and the creativity of their designs and quirks! Horikoshi had my head spinning with the infinite amount of unique characters he seems to pull out of his ass and make likable (or at least respectable) (um save for Mineta, fuck that guy, what a ginormous mistake. There’s this song I like called “Don’t Give Me Grapes” and while the lyrics aren’t applicable at all, I get that song stuck in my head whenever I see that idiot because my brain says “Don’t give me grapes.” Don’t give me grapes).

The writing is also fucking captivating, like obviously everyone knows the hero will come out the victor every single time, but with bnha’s arcs, you definitely find yourself asking “but how?? How the fuck will they get out of this one??” You’re left biting your nails thinking “dude, man, Horikoshi, there’s no way you didn’t just write yourself into a corner right now” but then there’s the TWISTS and ugh I love them. I love them. I Lov

[els-writes]

Girls of Paper and Fire: Review

Overall Rating: ★★★★

So, I got this book in my first Fairyloot box, meaning I had no idea what to expect going into it! I just picked it up after I was recovering from Ship of Magic, and I am pleasantly surprised! 

An intriguing world, a perhaps cliched plot line made unique, and an adorable romance that I really didn’t expect. All in all, a solid book, covering some really important themes that are handled beautifully. I definitely recommend this book!

More detailed review below! (I know this is a new book, so I've kept it as spoiler-free as possible! )

Writing Style: ★★★

For those who don’t know: I’m very particular with what writing styles I enjoy and don’t enjoy, and sadly this is one of those times a book is written in a way that just makes me wince. 

This is entirely my personal preference, but I’m not a big fan of present tense. I really struggle to read it, and it often jolts me out of the book. Girls of Paper and Fire is written in present tense, and whilst I enjoyed the book enough that it didn’t ruin it for me, there were a few times (mostly at the start of chapters, I found) where the present tense jostled me a little bit too much. 

Characters: ★★★★

I really adored the characters in this book. The main character, Lei, in particular was a wonderful POV to have. She was that typical spunky, humorous girl, but what I loved more than her funny quips was that she was always very true to her self, very honest, and openly vulnerable. She didn’t brush off the things that happened to her and the girls around her, and Ngan has managed to keep her character optimistic whilst still being very realistic. 

Wren is another character who I really liked. Without spoiling her, I shall simply say, I was a little concerned that she would be cliche when we found out more about her, but Ngan actually does a wonderful job with Wren.

A lot of the female characters we meet are excellently written (we spent most of the book with females), and pretty much any one that we spend a decent amount of time with is fleshed out just enough to not be a troupe or a cliche. Even Blue, a character who serves the role of the ‘mean girl’, has depth and meaning. We don’t see a lot of it, but Ngan shows just enough flashes for you to realise that there’s more to the story than we’re seeing (understandable, since we’re seeing it through Lei’s eyes). 

I will say the Demon King was a little bit of a disappointment to me. More because of the fact we don’t see him as much as I’d like to. He serves something of a ‘Voldemort’ role, in my opinion: he’s mentioned as the bad guy a lot, but doesn’t actually do all that much ‘on screen’, if you will? What we do see of him, I’m pleased with: again, because Ngan does a wonderful job of showing you those flashes of a story deeper than just Lei’s gaze. I’ll leave it there to save spoilers. 

Plot: ★★★★

I was a little concerned picking up the book that the story would be a bit cliched. Girls are chosen and taken from their homes to become concubines for the Demon King. It could have been very predictable, but it really isn’t. I think the plot is really unique, and there’s so much more to it than just what it says on the cover. I was totally invested, there wasn’t a moment when I wasn’t looking forward to the next chapter and finding out more. 

This book covers some heavy themes, and it does so really well. Reading the author notes and cards that are both in the book, and with the copy I got, I can tell that it was really important to her to address these issues in the novel, and I think she has done a fantastic job. The issues are very relevant to a lot of people, and whilst they don’t take over the story as much as I expected them to, I’m glad for it. Again, trying not to spoil it, but I think it’s really powerful that the issues are there, addressed, and Ngan doesn’t shy away from having her characters deal with them in very realistic and touching ways, but it is not the whole plot. Because these girls and their story is more than that, and I think Ngan has presented it in such a powerful way. 

My only complaint about the plot is the romance. I adored the romance actually, I didn’t go into this book expecting romance - or at the very least, not the romance that I got. I was very pleasantly surprised, and I really really liked the couple and their interactions. My only complaint is that the romance seemed to come out of nowhere. There were hints about the interest from both parties, but it seemed very insta-love, and when they finally revealed their feelings (to themselves, and then to one another), I was totally caught off guard. I was happy about it, but I was confused. 

World-Building: ★★★★

I really enjoyed the world-building in this book. It was a breath of fresh air after having read so many very historic-European-based fantasies recently. The first page of the book sets out very plainly for the readers the three terms for humans/demons in this world: Paper, Steel, and Moon. And I didn’t expect to be as grateful as that as I was. It was surprisingly nice to just have a note saying ‘hey, quick, this is how things work, k read on’ and be prepared for the book, instead of having the narrator (1st or 3rd person) slip it into the exposition, or make the readers work it out. I was dropped straight into the world, and it was nice and easy and fun to be there. I still have a lot of questions about the world, but judging from the ending, I do believe there will be a sequel, and if so, I’m looking forward to it! 

[booksandwords]

Outwards II by Wendigo

Read time: <1 Day Rating: 5/5

The quote: Selvaggia believes my time in the city has had a negative influence on my sense of duty. She's wrong. I've always harboured a strong disdain for the rules. — Mark Koch

It feels like there is a decent gap between volume i and ii. Mark and Stefan are lightly more comfortable in their relationship and their dynamic. But people are noticing. Selvaggia, Mark's older sister, sees something and makes not so idle threats. Stefan gets jumped and accused of trading himself for favouritism (look its not wrong). It all culminates in Stefan, Mark and Boos heading out on an arms drop to prove Stefan's loyalty to The Colony. One thing that has changed dramatically is the unhealthiness of Mark and Stefan's relationship it feels more balanced now. It's a subtle change but its there I really should stop applying contemporary morals to fictional post-apocalyptic situations.

Wendigos illustrations contain a wonderful amount of depth. In this volume we get to see more softness and less violence and aggression. Boos in particular is so endearingly drawn, you can't help but like him. And his blushes are so, so pretty and his trying to smother his crush is written so plainly on his face. On siblings Mark and Selvaggia while they are illustrated in a way that shows that they are clearly siblings similarities in their facial expressions and hair colouring Selvaggia is not simply a female version of Mark. In some ways, she is drawn with harsher and stronger lines than he is. Which works well given her position as a woman in The Colony. I'm pretty sure Mark's hair is longer than hers which I truly appreciate.

Something I missed on my last read, Boos is considered an innocent by the residents of The Colony one of only two who have that label (Valens is the other). That makes that whole scene in the van even more interesting to me, Mark clearly trusts him and his trust causes Stefan to engage. Boos's little touch of jealously just made me smile. Though I do wonder if Mark knows about that little crush and was goading him. Because seriously that would be totally in character. Random little detail from the character profiles, Boos is a redhead look that may become useful later.

Final note volume ii has the most frustrating ending I've read in a graphic for a long time. This is not the first time I read this. I read it right around when it was released and had to wait a couple of years for the next volume. It was a frustrating and long wait, a month would have been too long. So just know there is that for you to look forward to. Don't let it put you off it is a brilliant end but oh for those of us who had to wait it was a lot.

[the-desolated-quill]

Heavy Rain - Video Game blog

(SPOILER WARNING: The following is an in-depth critical analysis. If you haven’t played this game yet, you may want to before reading this review)

Do you remember the amount of hype that was building around this game at the time? Heavy Rain had caught the attention of multiple mainstream news sites with the promise that this was going to be the next big thing in games. A totally immersive, grown up drama that would bridge the gap between video games and films. Was it? Well... no. Eight years later, David Cage’s ‘interactive drama’ has been largely forgotten and while narratives in games did start to become more sophisticated in the 2010s, I’d argue that Heavy Rain didn’t really play that big a part as David Cage would like to think.

Heavy Rain is a murder mystery/psychological thriller. The Origami Killer kidnaps kids, drowns them in rainwater and leaves an origami figure in their hands and an orchid on their chests. The latest kid to get kidnapped is Shaun Mars and it’s a race against time to for the four main protagonists to save him before he dies. Like with David Cage’s previous game Fahrenheit, there is a good solid premise behind Heavy Rain. And to Quantic Dream’s credit, they have taken great strides to improve the gameplay. Instead of the stupid Simon Says system we got in Fahrenheit, Heavy Rain uses traditional QTEs and it works a lot better. It doesn’t distract you from what’s happening on screen and there are times where the game threatens to live up to its promise of being ‘immersive.’ For example when Ethan is having a panic attack in the train station and you have to physically move the wireless controller up and down to get him to walk or when Madison is picking a lock and you hold the L1 and R1 buttons down and tilt the controller to open the door. That’s good game design and it marries up quite nicely with what’s happening on screen. One thing I’m less keen on however is holding R2 to move the character. It feels so clunky and awkward, like you’re driving a car rather than moving a person. Nope. Don’t like that at all. Totally immersion breaking.

One gameplay mechanic I think had potential and wish was better handled is the ability to listen to a character’s thoughts by pressing the L2 button. That I thought was a legitimately clever concept and could have helped give the player an insight into the characters during pivotal moments. Like someone showing bravado only to listen to their thoughts and realise they’re actually terrified and just putting on an act. That could have been great. Instead the thoughts are either utterly mundane or are just there to give you tips when you’re stuck on how to progress. It feels like such a waste of potential.

I suppose I should quickly talk about the graphics considering they were a huge selling point at the time. The most realistic human faces ever, motion capture, blah blah blah. Except Heavy Rain wasn’t really the first game to use motion capture. The Uncharted games had used it for cutscenes and stuff. And honestly, I didn’t think the graphics were all that impressive even at the time. It’s the uncanny valley effect. There’s a reason why Pixar and Dreamworks make their human characters cartoony looking. It’s because rendering realistic looking humans on a computer is incredibly fucking difficult and people can instantly tell when it’s off. The characters in Heavy Rain look more like plastic action figures to me rather than actual people. Their movements and facial expressions just felt incredibly stilted and wooden to me, particularly during kissing and sex scenes where everything becomes really awkward and uncomfortable.

But never mind all of that. What about the writing? How does it compare to the insane laugh-a-thon that was Fahrenheit? Well if you’re after Tommy Wiseau-esque unintentional hilarity, you’re going to be slightly disappointed. Yes the writing is bad, but it’s not so bad it’s good like Fahrenheit was. It’s cliched, lacklustre and extremely limiting. The game boasts branching storylines and that all your choices matter, but in reality the story changes very little regardless of what you do. Yes there are loads of different endings, but what ending you get depends more on what happens in the final level than the rest of the game. As for characters dying at any time, that’s partially true. It’s impossible for Ethan and Scott to die before the end and when a character does die, all the game does is fence off certain levels.

In order to properly criticise and analyse the writing, let’s explore this character by character.

Ethan Mars

Out of all the characters, Ethan’s story is probably the most consistent and most satisfying to play. He’s the father of Shaun, the Origami Killer’s latest victim, and has to go through several Saw style trials in order to find him. I have to say, while the opening is extremely slow and tedious, forcing you to do all these mundane tasks like cooking and brushing your teeth and all this shit, as the game goes on, Ethan’s story comes the closest to delivering on the emotional and immersive experience David Cage promised. Pascal Langdale gives a pretty good performance for the most part and there were times where I did feel genuinely sorry for Ethan and his predicament. I’m not talking about the big set piece moments like when Jason dies at the beginning of the game. It’s the smaller scenes like Shaun doing his homework and Ethan looking on sadly at him or him sitting alone in his dusty office and reminiscing over his previous life before things went so wrong. That’s where the game really comes into its own. The trials too I thought were well written and designed for the most part. There’s some genuine tension in driving down the wrong side of the motorway or having to hack one of your own fingers off and it’s one of the rare occasions where the writing, acting and direction really come together and work as a cohesive whole.

That being said, there are still a litany of problems with Ethan’s story. The most glaring of which is the execution. While there are some legitimately powerful moments in Ethan’s story, they’re often ruined by David Cage’s overegging of the pudding. For example when Ethan has his panic attack in the train station, the motion controls and Langdale’s performance would have been enough to convey the pain and anxiety of the character. But then Cage takes it one step further with a stupid hallucination sequence with his dead kid Jason running round the station and people flopping over like ragdolls. Like... we get it. Ethan is depressed about his kid and that’s what has caused his fear of crowds. Even some of the mundane activities at the beginning of the game like making sure Shaun eats his dinner and does his homework on time could have been impactful if Cage didn’t drag it on for fucking hours and bore us into a coma as a result. In visual media, less is more. But the problem is David Cage seems so insecure about his own writing ability that he ends up overcompensating and bludgeoning the player over the head with these gaudy and over the top moments instead of just letting the performances of the actors convey the emotions and allowing the scene to speak for itself.

And then there are the moments and plot points that are just plain weird. So after his first son Jason dies in a car accident, Ethan starts experiencing blackouts. Not a bad idea, but the way they’re implemented is beyond incompetent. For starters Ethan has only two blackouts in the whole game and then it’s never mentioned or brought up again. Not even at the end when Shaun is all safe and sound (assuming you made all the right choices). Are we meant to assume that Ethan is magically cured after all this? And what exactly does Ethan get up to during the blackouts? When he regains consciousness, he’s always near Carnaby Square holding an origami figure. The significance of Carnaby Square is explained later on, but not how or why Ethan goes there during his blackouts. The only reason this is here is to plant the red herring that Ethan is the killer, except that’s utter bollocks. If Ethan was the killer, why would he kidnap a bunch of kids before his own? Were they just practice? What would be his motive? How did he learn to do origami? Where would he get the resources to create all these trials? What about the trials that involve him doing something in front of the camera or taking a photo as proof? If he’s responsible for these trials, who the hell is verifying this stuff? It’s utterly nonsensical and thus a complete waste of time. Apparently Ethan was supposed to share a psychic connection with the killer in the original script, but this was cut for time. The blackouts and stuff should have been cut too because it just doesn’t make sense with the current plot.

While there are a lot of flaws, I honestly would have been okay with Heavy Rain if the focus was just on Ethan. It wouldn’t have been a great game by any means, but it would have been decent enough. Unfortunately we’ve got three other characters to contend with, starting with...

Madison Paige

Let us turn our attention from the best character to the worst. I was amazed by the number of critics and gamers praising Madison for her strong characterisation because she has got to be one of the worst examples of video game sexism I’ve ever seen. The way David Cage writes and presents her is frankly despicable. She exists solely to be exploited. Cage’s obsession with her body is utterly disturbing. All characters, male and female, get shower scenes, but Madison is the only one that appears fully nude and the cameras pans across her entire body so you can see every inch of it. It’s really pervy and uncomfortable to watch. Worse still, every threat against her life is always sexual in nature. It’s not enough to have a cliched mad doctor who butchers people. We’ve got to have a scene where he tries to stick a drill up her vagina. There’s even a scene where a nightclub owner forces her to perform a striptease at gunpoint. You have the option to knock him out with a lamp before you get too naked, but the game seems to actively encourage you to strip off. And no, the intention clearly wasn’t to disturb the audience. The way it’s shot and choreographed is similar to the shower scene, clearly intended for a male gaze. And even if the scene was intended to be disturbing, there are ways of creeping out the player without sexually objectifying or demeaning women. It’s absolutely revolting. If you want further proof that Madison is intended solely to be exploited, please note that she’s only character in the game who has a separate person doing the voice while another person, glamour model Jacqui Ainsley, provides the body and face because presumably Judi Beecher isn’t sexy enough for David Cage. I rest my case.

But it’s not just that. It’s the way she’s implemented into the story too. All the other characters have their plots and vices set up immediately. Madison never does. We find out she has insomnia, but it’s never followed up on. We don’t know what caused it or whether she recovers. In fact we never learn a single solitary thing about her character. Her main role (apart from being sexually exploited) is to prop up the male hero Ethan. Even when it doesn’t make sense to do so. She treats his injuries and even helps him escape from the police, becoming a fugitive, despite not knowing a single thing about Ethan’s predicament. Also I couldn’t help but get the strongest sense of deja vu when Madison suddenly started to try and snog Ethan’s face off. It’s exactly like the bullshit romance from Fahrenheit. It comes right the fuck out of nowhere and is handled with all the grace and subtlety of a glow in the dark rhino. At least Heavy Rain gives you the option to decline. I tell you I couldn’t slam the ‘Don’t Kiss’ button fast enough.

Madison really does feel like a pointless inclusion to the game. She brings nothing new to the story and is basically used as a get out of jail free card. If Ethan or Norman fail to find the location of Shaun, Madison can just phone either of them up and tell them, even though she never meets or interacts with Norman at any point in the game, thus rendering the progress in their stories completely pointless. They could have sat in the corner dribbling for the entire game and it would have led to the same conclusion providing Madison survives the fire. (and speaking of plot holes and bad writing, why did she act shocked when Ann Sheppard told her the killer’s name. She never interacts with Scott at any point in the game. How does she know who he is? Did nobody proof read this shit?).

Norman Jayden

Here’s an idea to make playing this game more fun. When you get to the levels where you play as Norman Jayden, pretend he’s an alien from outer space. It would explain the daft VR sunglasses and Leon Ockenden’s terrible performance. I swear I’ve heard some bad American accents in my time, but this takes the fucking cake. I’m particularly amused by how camp Norman suddenly turns whenever he says the word ‘bastard.’

So. Norman. An FBI agent with a crippling drug problem... I think. He carries a tube of blue powder called triptocaine and sniffs it occasionally whenever he gets the shakes, but there’s a chance that this is actually caused by the VR sunglasses. There are several moments where a butler warns you not to overindulge in ‘you know what’ due to how dangerous it is. At first you think he’s referring to the triptocaine, but later it becomes clear he means the VR. So... what’s the point of the triptocaine then? Is he addicted to it or not? What’s he suffering withdrawal from? It’s all very unclear and poorly defined. And what exactly is the problem with the VR sunglasses? Why are they dangerous? How are they affecting him? We later see blood come out of his eyes, but how does that work? Not that any of this matters because it never actually links into the plot in any meaningful way. You can choose to either take the triptocaine or abstain and, aside from one level, the story carries on as normal regardless of your choice.

The thing is Norman Jayden’s story could have benefitted the most from the ‘your choice matters’ model. Imagine if the game actually gave you the freedom to investigate at your own pace. Allowed you to choose which suspects you question, which lead you follow, and have whether you find the killer or not all rely on the player’s own investigative abilities. Let the player find the clues and put together the solution themselves. Instead the game just yanks you from one false lead to the next and hands you solutions on a plate. This is a recurring problem throughout this game. Your choices simply don’t matter for the most part. David Cage merely wants to give the illusion of choice whilst forcing you down the path he wants you to take. There’s no real freedom or player choice. Actions very rarely have consequences and it all feels incredibly disappointing.

But the most excruciating thing about Norman Jayden isn’t even Norman Jayden. It’s the psychotic twat he has to hang around with. Lieutenant Carter Blake, police detective and arsehole. Throughout the game, Blake constantly butts heads with Norman and there never seems to be a good reason for it other than he’s a prick. Not just that, he often misuses his power, violently beating suspects for confessions and not only does Norman never report this, there’s also never a strong narrative reason for it. At first I thought Blake was just desperate to find the killer, but as it goes on you realise that’s not the case at all. He just enjoys being a violent dick. Why? I don’t know. And then there’s this whole witch hunt against Ethan. Ex wife Grace comes into the precinct to tell Blake about how Ethan dreams of drowning bodies and from then on Blake goes on a personal vendetta against Ethan, convinced he’s the Origami Killer. Except it doesn’t make the slightest bit of sense. For one thing, Ethan has an alibi. He was in a coma when the killings first started. Plus Grace says this happened in the spring and it’s been established that the Origami Killer only drowns his victims in the fall. There’s no concrete evidence tying Ethan to the crime. Just a vague, contradictory story from his ex wife. And yet Blake blindly goes along with it. Worse still, Norman never calls him out on it. It’s monumentally stupid writing. Did you know David Cage won a BAFTA for this game? How? Fucking how?!

Scott Shelby

Finally we come to Scott Shelby, a private detective who has been hired by the families of the victims of the Origami Killer to investigate. I have mixed feelings about this story. The Scott levels are often very dull and repetitive with each level mostly playing out the same. Scott questions someone about the Origami Killer, they refuse to talk, Scott leaves, someone threatens the witness, Scott saves them, witness gives information. Wash, rinse, repeat. It gets very boring after a while, especially considering the information you learn is basically the same as what Norman learns. The whole thing just feels like a massive waste of time. 

Scott suspects someone called Gordi Kramer to be the killer and has to contend with Gordi’s father Charles, but from the moment you meet Gordi, you know he can’t possibly be the killer and yet the game constantly focuses on the Kramers. Another issue I have is his relationship with Lauren Winter, the mother of one of the killer’s victims who tags along. Not only does she contribute nothing to the narrative other than making sad eyes every five minutes, the two also randomly kiss each other near the end despite sharing no hint of romantic chemistry. (seriously has David Cage ever been on a date with a human being before?).

But despite all of this, I found myself quite liking Scott. Sam Douglas gives the strongest performance of the four leads and the character comes off as warm and affectionate. Despite the tedium of the levels he’s in, it’s often his charm and likability that gets you through. Which is what makes the reveal that he’s in fact the Origami Killer all the more shocking.

Now when I first played this in 2010, I honestly thought it was a good twist. Scott pretended to be a private detective in order to find and dispose of evidence connecting to him. His obsession with Gordi Kramer was because he was insulted that there was another person killing children without a ‘good’ reason. I even liked the little detail that it was seeing Ethan throw himself in front of a car in an attempt to save Jason that sparked off the idea of the Origami Killer. It falls into that classic trope of heroes creating their own villains and it’s fairly well executed. However there is a little bit of cheating going on here. The timing of certain scenes doesn’t quite add up and some of the thoughts Scott has just doesn’t make sense when you know he’s the killer. Also this revelation opens up a ton of plot holes. Where did he get the money to buy all this stuff? The cars. The abandoned factory. The warehouse. The phones. The secret room in his apartment where he grows the orchids. He used to be a cop. There’s no way he could have had that much money in his retirement fund for all of this. Why did he subscribe to an origami magazine? Isn’t that a bit of a giveaway? Why did he buy the warehouse where he drowns his victims using his own name when he used his dead brother’s name for all of his other transactions? And what happened to his asthma? David Cage puts a lot of emphasis on his asthma in the early levels, but there’s never any payoff in the later levels. In fact it’s largely forgotten about. Scott gets into fist fights and even an over the top gunfight through a mansion and yet never gets an asthma attack when before he seemed to get them at the drop of a hat.

But the biggest question I have is this. Why Ethan? The Origami Killer kidnaps kids in order to test the fathers. To see how far they’d go to save their sons. As I said before, it was Ethan’s selflessness that inspired Scott to start the killings, to find a father that could do what his couldn’t. So why does he pick Ethan? He already knows that Ethan is prepared to sacrifice himself for his son. Why put him through all these tests? It just seems pointless. It gets even weirder at the end when Scott tries to kill Ethan. Again, the whole point of these murders is to test the fathers. Ethan succeeded. Why does he need to die? It completely goes against his modus operandi. And why use a gun to kill him? The final trial involves Ethan drinking poison, but then it’s revealed that the poison isn’t real. If Scott intended to kill Ethan, why not just use real poison? David Cage clearly hasn’t thought this through very thoroughly and this is a problem that extends throughout the entire game.

I applaud David Cage for wanting to tell different kinds of stories using the video game medium, but the fact of the matter is he’s simply not good at it. Yes video games are going through something of a renaissance right now, but I’d argue that it’s in spite of Heavy Rain rather than because of it. We have seen some truly incredible games over the past decade. Games that have redefined what you can do with the medium and told really engaging stories. Telltale’s The Walking Dead, The Last Of Us, The Stanley Parable, BioShock, the Mass Effect trilogy, Horizon Zero Dawn, Life Is Strange and many more. These games have truly innovated and expanded the medium. Heavy Rain however does the opposite. David Cage talks about innovating games, but if you look at what inspires him as a writer and how Heavy Rain is designed and structured, you’d think that Cage was embarrassed by video games. He’s trying so hard to make Heavy Rain more cinematic, but it doesn’t work because it’s not a film. It’s a video game. In fact if this was a film, it would be laughed out of every film festival. It’s cliched, boring, insulting and just plain stupid. Yes it’s unique, but unique doesn’t necessarily equate to good.

Five years later, Supermassive Games would adopt this style of storytelling for the truly brilliant Until Dawn and it works so much better because there is effort to actually tell a compelling story with relatable characters and to give your choices actual meaning and impact. Heavy Rain however just gets bogged down in its own pretentiousness, pouring scorn over the medium being used to tell the story without offering anything of substance to replace it. There’s a reason why people don’t talk about Heavy Rain anymore and it’s not because it’s a BAFTA award winning ‘game changer’.

[childofaura]

Rating the anime I’ve watched in 2019: A really short list

Kinda just felt like doing this, 2019 has been a REALLY interesting year in anime. I didn’t watch a whole lot of stuff, but I wanted to kind of go over what I did watch. So I’ll talk about what I thought and rate it 1-10.

PLEASE KEEP IN MIND: THEY’RE RATED SOLELY ON MY OPINIONS, IF I DON’T FEEL STRONGLY ABOUT ONE PLEASE DON’T GET MAD. ALSO ALL OF THESE WERE WATCHED IN SUBS. ALSO SPOILERS AHOY.

1. Dororo.

The OP was AWESOME. The animation in the first half of the series was really smooth, but there was a slightly noticeable dip in animation later on. Not huge, but still there. Actors were FANTASTIC, and the little girl who plays Dororo is so cute! Characters were incredibly well written and varied, Hyakkimaru still struggled despite his honed reflexes and training, and Tahomaru was so morally divisive, it was great. Somber tones really bring out the nasty forbidden underside of the Shogunate’s “lasting peace”. Though the ending with Tahomaru, Hyakkimaru’s mother, and his father figure all dying in the fire was rather... disappointing, Hyakkimaru forgiving his father and Dororo deciding what to do with the large sum of money left behind, to use it for the greater good, wraps everything up.

Dororo’s a solid 8/10.

2. Rising of the Shield Hero

I ended up checking this one out after hearing all the controversy it was stirring up, because I wanted to see what it was. Like always, the “controversy” was a big tepid pile of nothing, and I got to experience an isekai that operates under a different mood with different dynamics. Animation quality is consistent and good, and there’s a LOT of female characters that are well rounded and strong, like Raphtalia, Melty, the Filolial Queen, Glass, etc. Scenery is beautiful, and Naofumi’s growth into trusting again is nice to watch. Also the soundtrack is so enjoyable, Kansas is my favorite song. Cons, though few, are still there: the pacing can be a little funky at times (Mainly what comes to mind is that AWFUL filler episode where they fight the Church from the molten pit, and don’t move AT ALL. Worst episode ever), the physical growth of some of the characters like Filo is jarring (In two days she grows horse sized, after they had that montage of taking care of her) even with an explanation. The last thing that rubs me the wrong way (It’s not really a con in general, just a con for me) is Raphtalia’s crush on Naofumi. It’s simply that they spend the first few episodes building their relationship as a father/daughter, then they try to shift to romance after establishing that first familial relationship.

Rising of the Shield Hero’s an 8/10.

3. The Promised Neverland

AAAAAAAH HOT DAMN I LOVED THIS ONE. It was completely out of my range of what I normally watched at the beginning of 2019, BUT I LOVED IT SO MUCH. The animation is eerie, especially the facial expressions and how smoothly they move. The children are so darling and thinking about how they might have possibly died in S1 broke my heart, as well as me hoping they didn’t, lol. Every episode leaves off on this wonderfully tantalizing cliffhanger, so binging the episodes are a must. Characters like Mama and Sister Krone are terrifying, though in the latter’s case I love how clever she was, and was sad when she died. Her Japanese actress definitely blew it out of the water and had a lot of fun with the character. I’d say the only (not really a con, but) thing that weirds me out is how close the characters’ mouths are to their faces, but that’s a stylistic thing and I won’t fault them for that. The children are strong and resilient and I can’t wait for the next season.

The Promised Neverland’s a 9/10.

4. Demon Slayer

I got into this one late, and I hate myself for getting into it late. But nonetheless, I’m so glad I watched it and I can say with confidence it’s up there with FullMetal Alchemist: Brotherhood’s level of excellence. Tanjiro is such a kind-hearted boy who constantly puts himself through physical torture for his only remaining family; Nezuko’s “hypnotism” to see humans as family feels more like placebo because she just genuinely has compassion for people, especially when she looks at Ms Tamayo and Yushiro as family when they’re also demons. All the characters are deeply involved in this story with either known or hidden (Zenitsu) strengths that allow them to conquer their struggles. The style is unique and the character designs are pretty, and HOO BOY THE FIGHTING ANIMATIONS, THE STYLIZED TECHNIQUES. MWAH! MUCH LOVE! I love the soundtrack so much, it almost reminds me of the Pokemon movies’ orchestra pieces. The story is well paced, and no issues with filler. Showing how even demons deserve compassion is a beautifully unexpected twist in this show.

Demon Slayer’s a 10/10

5. To the Abandoned Sacred Beasts

I do love this series dearly, and while the good outweighs the “meh”, I still have to address the issues. BUT FIRST, THE GOOD THINGS: Characters in this show are incredibly in-depth, even the soldiers. The designs of the Incarnates are fantastic, terrifying and imposing. Schaal is a strong young girl who sets off with just a suitcase and a rifle and, after meeting Hank, decides to get inside his mindset to see why he’s doing what he does, and why he had to kill her father. Hank is a man in constant suffering who has to see his best friends losing themselves to insanity, knowing that they’re not the people they used to be but questioning whether he’s really doing the right thing regardless. All the soldiers have their own focal point in the episodes they show up in, showing their unique traits and attitudes, and how it links to the monsters they are now. The concept of Incarnate soldiers is parallel to veterans with PTSD. While Liza’s a bit of a ridiculous fan-service character, there’s really no complaints because the fan-service in this show is balanced; they show Hank unnecessarily shirtless a LOT (Though honestly I’d be fine if they let him wear his shirts more). But the cons. There are a decent amount of them. Animation is clunky and lower budget. Pacing is not easy to keep up with, as the split between Hank’s mission and the main conflict with Cain interrupt each other quite jarringly. Schaal’s father seemingly rises as a zombie again to serve no other purpose other than Schaal’s character growth, as we could assume that a LOT of the other monsters like Keynes, with the fire of justice, would also come back to life. Liza doesn’t really seem to do much or contribute much as a character; she came close when she volunteered to take up the Incarnate Extermination Squad’s equipment by saying she knew how it worked but she literally. Just. Held up a shield for the commander (forgot his name, Cain’s little bro) to jump off of. She needs to do more. Love the series and I love watching it, but it’s a mixed bag.

To the Abandoned Sacred Beast’s a 7/10.

6. Fire Force.

Well... this one is definitely gonna be tough to deal with, because I only got maybe 8 or 9 episodes in before I had to break away. So I’ll break it down simply.

Pros: Animation is SOLID. ABSOLUTE. FLUID AND DYNAMIC. It’s literally Midoriya vs Todoroki, but in EVERY EPISODE. Some characters are fascinating and enjoyable like Shinra, Maki, Joker, and Hibana. The concept of Infernals, people who just burst into flames without warning, are a solid idea to run on. The OP is a banger. The soundtrack fits the mood perfectly.

Cons, and a lot of them: There isn’t a whole lot going on in terms of variety, it’s mainly fighting Infernals in the city. It picks up eventually, but slowly. While some characters were enjoyable, others were either flat or downright unbearable to deal with; flat characters like Obi (He’s not a bad character, but he feels... generic) and Iris (Also not bad, she’s strong in what she’s had to deal with and being kind regardless, but it’s just standard quiet girl.). Unbearable character is really just two so far: The lieutenant, who gets borderline abusive (both mentally and physically) with Maki (Like I get it dude, you had trauma with fire and Infernals but you don’t need to be an abusive shit), and Tamaki, ESPECIALLY Tamaki. She’s rude, screechy, treated Shinra like utter shit when they first meet, and respects almost no one outside of her district for no real reason. And she also falls into the next con: The one-sided fan-service. Now I will defend the right to fan-service with everything I believe in, but I’m still allowed to have my opinion on it, and the way it goes in Fire Force is just... so awful. Fan-service jarringly interrupts what are supposed to be heavy emotional or important scenes (Iris sitting on the ground with nothing but a towel, Iris getting her clothes burned off by Hibana, Tamaki sticking her butt out after getting hurt by her district partner, Tamaki’s clothes being burned up and being against the wall with that weird-ass kitty pose with her wrists, etc.), Tamaki’s “lucky lechery” is supposed to be funny somehow but it makes literally no sense, and oh cool she ends up sexually harassing the dudes with it, too. I could understand this level of fan-service if it was like a harem anime or a cheese-cake-ish anime or whatever, but it’s- it’s a shounen. There’s nothing that really shows you there’s gonna be this weird level of fan-service.

I respect everyone who loves Fire Force, but it’s just not my cup of tea. That’s all.

Fire Force’s a 6.5/10.

7. Vinland Saga

THIS ANIME. THIS ANIME IS PERFECT IN EVERY WAY AND YOU WILL NEVER CHANGE MY MIND. The first OP PERFECTLY encapsulates just how much of a hellish live Thorfinn is about to live. The animation (Being from the same company as Attack on Titan and Kabaneri of the Iron Fortress) is SUPERB where the characters move with weight and purpose. Seriously, have you seen how the characters jump forward? With their legs and arms forward? It’s a little detail but it’s so great. Characters are multi-faceted and it gives me strong feelings about how awful they are but how clever or strong or brilliant they are. The pacing of the anime is perfect; something plot-important happens in each episode, the characters travel long distances to give you a feel of movement, and there’s not a single episode that could really be considered “filler”. Dynamics of these characters work in fascinating ways at times. The actors absolutely own their roles; Askeladd’s actor nails that perfect nonchalance where he seems surprised but you know he’s truly not, Thorfinn’s older actor knows how to scream his lungs out in anger. The main star, though? Thorkell, hands down. That guy is absolutely having fun with his character.

Vinland Saga’s a solid 10/10.

[popcultureadventures]

Comics Critique: Thor: God of Thunder 1-11

There is a lack of in-depth comic criticism going around, isn’t there? I understand why: just between Marvel, DC and Image there is far too much content to review on a monthly basis considering what I assume would be a very small readership. But still, I can’t help but be disappointed with the lack of smart, critical writing going around about contemporary “pop” comics. Expect to see a few think pieces pop up around the launch of a new #1 from a current indie darling, or a progressive super hero book, but expect even more to see that media attention immediately vanish.  Talk about self defeating. If no one can be bothered to put real thought into critiquing these books, then why should the writers and artists and editors ever put any effort into making sure they can stand up to real thought? Anyway, why sit around feeling bad when you could be providing a good example? I’m going to try and write at least a few words about each comic I read. And what I read and when will be all over the place and with no real rhyme or reason :)

Anyway, let’s get on with it and cross the Rainbow Bridge to Asgardia, shall we?

Thor: God of Thunder is the starting point for the current Thor run, written by Jason Aaron and here pencilled by Esad Ribic. You’ve probably seen it in the news as the origin of the “female Thor” that caused the usual boring arguments that we should have worked through in the 90s. But that’s all I’ll say about that. This book I’m actually reviewing comes well before female Thor, and stars regular dick and Mjölnir wielding Thor in a fairly classical adventure. Actually, it stars three Thor’s with dicks, but only two with Mjölnir. But I digress. There are two main ideas Aaron is playing with here: The first is that of a new villain, the God Butcher, who is a seriously powerful and ambitious entity dead set on killing every “God” in the universe, whether they be from Earth’s pantheon or others. The second is the way Aaron splits his story between three different iterations of Thor, the past, present, and future, in the first arc before bringing them together in the second arc for a multi Thor beat down.

Unfortunately, I think Aaron seriously missed a trick or two in his execution of both these concepts. When you’re sure a story is going to go one way and it instead veers off into another well developed direction it can be a nice surprise. What’s more disappointing is when, after developing an interesting idea, the story abandons it and doesn’t find anything of substance to replace it. These issues suffer from just such disappointment. The direction of Aaron’s set up seems fairly clear. Past Thor is arrogant, and prone to making stupid mistakes. In 893 A.D. his initial encounter with the God Butcher is going to go horribly wrong, and instead of owning up to his mistakes he will hide them, so as to protect his pride. Present Thor has to pay for his previous incarnation’s hubris, proving again his moral compass has evolved since Odin banished him to Earth. Meanwhile future Thor, now king of a destroyed Asgard, is going to foreshadow future stories and be a snarky bad ass. This is what I had pegged from about issue 2, and indeed, this is kind of what happens. But it’s all very muddled. Let’s examine the text in detail.

In this page we see one of Gorr’s victims explain to present Thor that “Everything he’s doing now, it’s all because of this cave and what you did to him there.” Keep in mind this is before we find out what past Thor did.

Later, we see past Thor captured by Gorr and seemingly about to give in to torture. He’s rescued in the next panel, and so Aaron sustains the question of "What Thor did in the cave”.

Here’s are the pages crossing between past Thor’s showdown with Gorr post rescue, and present Thor putting up with Gorr’s evil plan exposition dump. The explanation provided doesn’t really explain why we should blame Thor for Gorr’s current actions. It just adds up to “I was killing a lot of God’s, but then Thor almost stopped me, so I realised I had to kill even more and also create a crazy evil master plan”. So we’re meant to blame past Thor for, what, not checking for a body? Can we really expect a viking in 893 A.D. to be genre savvy? It seems Aaron is building up to past Thor having committed some kind of shocking “Original Sin” (haha), but all that foreshadowing doesn’t amount to anything. Except...

And so we finally see Thor’s infamous pride surface. He demands that “we will never speak of this day again.” At first this confused me, due to the lack of direct explanation for what exactly he wished to keep secret. But I guess he just doesn’t want word getting out that he was defeated and held prisoner?

Now, it’s always tricky when you get the feeling that your preconceived notions of a text have influenced your reaction, positive or negative. In this case, I know that nu Thor is coming. I know that original flavour Thor is going to be deemed unworthy and lose Mjölnir. The specifics, I have no idea of. But I was expecting Aaron to begin seeding this development with some hints as to Thor’s flaws, flaws which could easily be consistent with many prior characterisations. And he really does’t. Even when past Thor appears next to Thors 2 and 3 in the second arc through timey wimey machinations, he isn’t characterised as stupid or arrogant as he has been by other writers. He’s just a little more rash, and his no holds barred heroics even come off kind of cool?

I mean, space shark!

Unfortunately, I think that by not following through on his setup for past Thor Aaron severely limits the potential for Gorr the God Butcher, who could have been a great new villain in an era where such creations are in short supply. Villains are almost always more effective when their point of view has a twisted (or even perfectly sensible) logic to it. If past Thor had done something actually heinous than Gorr might have a decent reason for wanting all God’s extinct. I hate to sound like too much of a backseat writer when I should be discussing what’s on the page instead of what’s not. There just seems to be a lot of missed potential here.

Gorr’s grand motivations provide the main thematic backbone of the text. He hails from a barren, perhaps post apocalyptic planet where he and his tribe struggle to survive. He loses his mother to predators, his partner dies while pregnant with one of his children, and he struggles to provide for his remaining children. All the while, his culture demands complete fealty to their pantheon. The fact that Gorr’s people often sacrifice what little resources they have as offerings to these God’s angers him, when no matter how much anyone prays the call never seems to be answered. Eventually Gorr is abandoned by his tribe for being a heretic, and just as he resigns himself to death he encounters cosmic beings locked in combat. After stealing the power of one of these beings he takes to the stars  and goes about killing Gods, convinced that they do the universe more harm than good.

It’s certainly interesting that during issue 1 the reader is introduced to present Thor in a sequence that reverses this story. On a similarly barren planet, albeit one where the resident culture is without belief God, a thirsty child prays to any God’s out there in the universe to bring rain. Thor, hearing the prayer, provides amply in an heroic act. This alien species also provides a striking resemblance to Gorr’s. 

So, two conflicting stories with conflicting morals. Gorr’s story will jive well with an atheist outlook, while Thor’s story will seem ridiculous. But Thor is a comic about God’s, and thus it’s going to be about faith, and every comic that truly works with the character is going to be directly addressing this issue and either asking the reader to believe or question. Here, Aaron seems to be asking us to believe, if not in an ultimate God, then in Thor the comic character. Thor, who even in his supposedly most flawed incarnation is heroic and fair. Thor, who answers a child’s prayer from across the universe. Thor, who will fight for Asgard until the end of time.

Gorr’s story ends when it becomes clear that, by destroying all God’s, he has become a de facto God himself. Ever in denial, the only way he can admit this obvious fact is through a family created from his powers, seemingly built from different aspects of his psyche. Aaron telegraphs Gorr’s fate as the “God of Hypocrisy” early on, and while the reveal might have been a cute twist in a 2 or 3 issue story, as the conclusion to 11 chapters of build up it feels too convenient as a way to quickly justify Gorr’s defeat.

So, rather then providing a deconstruction of the Thor character, these issues of God of Thunder seem to instead be a celebration of the character in a few of his different configurations. The fact that Aaron consistently rejects or fails to address criticisms of the character, after decades of post Watchmen comics deconstructing iconic heroes, could almost be said to be a fresh subversion in itself. And yet it can’t help but feel slight, because it’s a story missing a serious dramatic arc for its hero. I’m still excited to see what Aaron does with Thor next, but I hope he does get around to properly testing his protagonist.

[judgeanon]

A SHORT HISTORY OF FEMALE JUDGES IN JUDGE DREDD FROM 2004 TO 2007

With a sense of newfound stability and confidence brought about by finally being owned by a company that genuinely cared for its characters and stories, 2000AD carried onwards into the new millennium, with John Wagner leading Dredd into a new epic and setting him off on the road to a storyline that would redefine both character and setting forever. One particular staple of this era is the solidification of the strip as a very character-driven, procedural crime drama, building even further on the lessons learned from “The Pit” but also adding a deeper layer of examination of the strip’s protagonist and his relationships with his supporting cast.

Unfortunately, said supporting cast is still running a bit low in the female judges department, although that doesn’t really put a dent on female protagonism in general, as Dredd’s niece Vienna takes a much more center stage. And although Chief Judge Hershey likewise remains a regular fixture, it’ll still take a few more years for Wagner to introduce a new female judge with any real lasting power. In the meantime, however, a new generation of writers and artists will begin introducing several new female judges in a variety of roles, from background extras to one-thrill wonders and maybe even villains...

(Previous posts: 1979 to 1982 - 1982 to 1986 - 1986 to 1990 - 1990 to 1993 - 1993 to 1995 - 1995 to 1998 - 1998 to 2001 - 2001 to 2004. All stories written by John Wagner unless noted otherwise. Cover art by Henry Flint)

Our first stop is “Terror”, painted by Colin MacNeil and published in progs 1392-1399 (June-July 2004). A prologue to the upcoming mini-epic of the year, it heavily features a Judge Stuyvesant as part of a small task force of judges investigating the extremist democratic terrorist group Total War. Sporting her own variant on the black bobcut, Stuyvesant runs surveillance on a suspected Total War operative as he falls hopelessly in love with a citizen, acting as a secret bridge of sorts between them and Dredd, and saving the latter from having to spend hours looking at monitors.

Right after the last episode of “Terror” comes “Big Deal at Drekk City”, drawn by Cam Kennedy (progs 1400-1404, August ’04), where Dredd and a Judge Vance take a handful of cadets, including a very aptly-named Cadet Laws on a rather troubled Cursed Earth familiarization trip. Vance proves to be an experienced judge, not just in combat but also at testing the cadets’ attitude, but at the story’s climax she takes a spear to the chest and comes extremely close to dying. Luckily for her, the cadets overturn Dredd’s orders to stay back and return to save both of them, with Laws taking care of her injuries. So a decent outing, all things considered.

And so we get to the first big thrill of this post, the 12-episodes long “Total War”, drawn by Henry Flint and published in progs 1408 to 1419 (September-December ’04). This is also Chief Judge Hershey’s first city-wide crisis in office, as both “Helter Skelter” and the Aliens invasion were events mostly isolated to one or two sectors. The threat itself comes from an alleged two hundred nuclear explosives secretly placed around the city by Total War, the afore-introduced terrorist group. Their demands are simple: all judges must turn in their badges and surrender their power to the public, or they will begin detonating the bombs at regular intervals until they accept or the city has been reduced to glowing dust.

With a clear (albeit hidden) enemy and the tense, gripping pace of a good Tom Clancy novel, “Total War” has little room for character development, and most of it is taken by a subplot involving Dredd, Vienna and a genetically-altered clone. The impersonal nature of the threat also means there’s not much in the way of gunplay or fight scenes, with most of the action being a race against the clock for Dredd and a team of investigators to locate and dispose of the nukes. One thing we do get to see, however, is Hershey at her best as Chief Judge: unfettered, collected and focused, but also willing to resort to certain tactics that many of her predecessors would’ve found difficult to stomach. The most obvious case being the opening page of episode 7, where in a citywide broadcast she concedes to Total War’s demands and orders the immediate disbanding of the judges and a return to a civilian government.

Naturally, it’s all a ruse designed to buy more time as Dredd and company desperately chase every possible lead and exhaust every resource to find the bombs, and to Hershey’s credit it works like a spell. Chief of Undercover Division Judge Hollister also makes an appearance, as does Judge Stuyvesant from a few months back, and it’s actually pretty interesting to see how Flint manages to give the latter’s design a few unique qualities to differentiate her from her chief.

A few female undercover judges, an unnamed bespectacled control judge and a fairly striking PSU judge also make small appearances, and once the crisis is over we get a short and somewhat odd scene where Dredd tries to hand over his badge for racing to save an endangered Vienna from the devastation of a nuclear blast instead of protecting the citizens, but Hershey downplays his perceived dereliction of duty and reminds him that he’s still human. It’s rather strange and almost out of place at the end of a story where her stoicism reached almost robotic heights, but it does make a good job of showing the personal bond that still exists between them. And at any rate, it’s worth it to see her turn Dredd’s catchphrase against him.

By way of intermission, the special prog 2005′s “Christmas with the Blints” (Andrew Currie, January ‘05) has Dredd travelling to Brit-Cit hot on the trail of a married couple of serial killers, which nets us a couple of background female brit judges in a few panels. Then it’s back to the Big Meg for a handful of epilogue stories dealing with the fallout of Total War’s terrorist attack. “After the Bombs” (Jason Brashill, 1420-1422, idem) has yet another appearance by Stuyvesant; “Horror in Emergency Camp 4″ (D’Israeli, 1425-1428, February ‘05) has a quite staggering amount of possible background female street judges, including two named ones called Rush and Woo and a very librarian-like PSU judge; and “Missing in Action” (written by Gordon Rennie and drawn by Ian Gibson, 1429-1431, March ‘05) has not only a young Judge Herriman as a small plot point, but also a very odd female judge with dual straight shoulderpads, platinum blonde hair and a Justice Dept. branded hairband who may be a psi (Anderson, even?), although it’s hard to tell because the badge looks like a regular street judge’s.

(The one liberty Justice Dept. hasn’t crushed: artistic liberties!)

EDIT: via Facebook, Gibson himself has confirmed the judge pictured here is indeed a regular street judge. He also had a few comments about the design:

"Returning to the ‘uniform’ topic, for some reason that now escapes me, I decided to give the female judge from the Missing in action adventure a Justice department head scarf. I think it suits her and makes her less scary for the little girl they rescue.”

Speaking of Psis, a slightly redesigned Judge Karyn reappears in progs 1432-1436’s “Descent” (by Rennie and Boo Cook, April ‘05) with a new pink hairstyle and a psi-flash that leads her and Dredd into the Undercity to rescue some survivors of a hovership crash through the hole left by one of Total War’s bombs. Unfortunately, what they find there is a supernatural entity known as the Shadow King, which Dredd and Karyn had already fought in the Megazine (volume 4, issue 5). In the ensuing firefight, Dredd is possessed by the Shadow King’s spirit and turns into a hulking monstrosity, and Karyn takes her whole “Anderson wannabe” character trait to its logical conclusion by knocking Dredd out and absorbing the spirit into herself. Unfortunately, the Shadow King turns out to be too powerful for Karyn, and ends up destroying her mind and taking over her body. She’s eventually subdued by Dredd and judge reinforcements, and the creature once known as Judge Karyn is locked inside a holding cell deep inside Psi Division’s headquarters, never to escape.

It’s a move somewhat reminiscent of Garth Ennis’ treatment of Judge Perrier or Dekker: bring an obscure character back from the depths of oblivion, use them as supporting cast for a couple of years, then kill ‘em off at a later date. And it can definitely be read as a fairly manipulative attempt at getting some emotion out of disposable characters by offing recognizable names rather than complete nobodies. However, the difference between them and Karyn to me lies in Rennie’s very meta-textual idea of her chasing after Anderson’s star. Karyn, much like Janus, was created as a reserve Anderson and swiftly put aside once she returned. They both have their fans, sure, but the general consensus is that try as they might, they just couldn’t match up to the original. Which is exactly what happens to Karyn in this story. She tries to be Anderson but ultimately isn’t as strong as her, and ends up literally erased as a result. It’s still a very heroic sacrifice, as she dies saving Dredd, but it also has a deeper narrative core that was missing from pretty much every other revival of old, forgotten judges.

Rennie sticks around to write the much longer “Blood Trails” (art by Currie, progs 1440-1449, May-July ‘05), which is his own take on the Wagnerian procedural cop show-style mini-epic. As such it features a nice couple of female background judges (only one gets a name: Weisak), including a surprise cameo by Judge Morinta, the inventor med-judge from “Gulag”, although for some reason she’s now blonde instead of brunette. And of course, there’s the by now mandatory final page visit to Hershey’s office, this time to orchestrate a covert retaliatory orbital strike against Anatoli Kazan, War Marshall Kazan’s clone (also introduced in “Gulag”), for siccing a bunch of assassins on Dredd’s niece. Needless to say, it gets carried out quite swiftly.

A few weeks later, Carlos Ezquerra draws another background female judge in “Matters of Life and Death”, also by Rennie (1452, August ‘05). Wagner returns with artist Kev Walker in tow to deliver “Mandroid” (1453-1464, August-November ‘05), and although the main female character in that story is not really a judge, there are still a few proper ones scattered throughout, including a Judge Kowalski who gets a tender little background moment in what’s otherwise one of the absolute bleakest stories of the decade.

Right afterwards, we get a Tek Judge James in prog 1465′s “Everything In The Garden” (Arthur Ranson, November ‘05). Then Rennie and Flint return for a small epilogue to “Blood Trails”, as Anatoli Kazan, now hunted by his own government, arrives in Mega-City One requesting political asylum in “Change of Loyalties” (1466, November ‘05). Of course, Dredd’s having none of it, but since Anatoli could potentially be an invaluable tactical resource and a goldmine of intel, Hershey asks him to at least talk to the creep before calling for his execution. So what we’ve got here is maybe the first example of the main conflict between Dredd and Hershey, one that continues literally to this day in stories like “Harvey”.

(Also of note: this Brendan McCarthy-esque coloring job by Flint. Talk about seeing red!)

On this corner we have the immovable object: Judge Dredd, with a mindset as narrow as his helmet’s visor, never one to double-think himself or back down, apt to following both his sharp gut instincts and his Everestian mountains of experience, and usually very, very right. On the other, we have the irresistible force: Chief Judge Hershey, focused on the big picture, willing to take a chance on a potentially risky idea that could also bring about huge benefits to her city, confident that they’ll be able to handle whatever pitfalls may appear later on, but willing to listen to all parties involved. That last part is important because with any other chief this is the kind of conflict that would lead to some serious fallout, but Hershey is smarter than that, and more importantly, has seen first-hand what happens to Chiefs who don’t listen to Dredd. Her default way, then, of bridging the gap between the two forces is to plainly ask Dredd his opinion and promise to act accordingly to it, in this case, by letting him decide her vote on the council.

Overall it’s a decent way to avoid some very cliche drama, but there’s a couple of problems with it, not least of all that the sheer number of stories like this has turned it into a cliche in and of itself. However, the biggest problem, for me, is that it reduces Hershey to a bit of an echo chamber or political proxy for Dredd, allowing him to make decisions and direct the course of the city without actually leaving his position as a street judge. It lets him play in both arenas at once but doesn’t chain him to anything. From an in-story perspective it makes sense, since despite everything they still have a history together and Dredd is rarely wrong, but it’s annoying from a character standpoint because it stifles Hershey quite a bit. At its worst, she comes off as just a puppet of Dredd’s, although her directly asking for his council and seemingly agreeing with it on some level helps stave that off. And in a sneaky bit of storytelling, when the council does make its decision on Anatoli’s fate we get to see the result but we don’t get to see who actually voted for what. So whether Hershey actually went through with her promise is left, much like the voting hands, up in the air.

Rounding up 2005 we have a forensic judge at the start of “Nobody”, by Robbie Morrison and Richard Elson (1467, November). The new year then kicks off with a nice handful of background judges through “Your Beating Heart”, by Wagner and Patrick Goddard (1469-1474, January-February ‘06) and the return of Judge Lola in Ian Edginton and D’Israeli’s “Time and Again” (1475, February ‘06), which makes sense considering it’s a sequel to “Tempus Fugitive”. The same story also features an elderly, unnamed scarred female judge as head of a parole board. 

Things get a little more exciting in our next stop, with newcomer writer Simon Spurrier, artist Laurence Campbell and (awesomely-named) inker Kris Justice’s “Dominoes” (1482, April ‘06), a story that plants some seeds that would take six years to blossom.

(This is also the first time an artist draws the oversized chains holding Hershey’s badge far as I've been able to gleam, which means I owe Campbell a drink because it’s my absolute favorite detail of her uniform)

Ostensibly, the story is all about Dredd going on a diplomatic mission to Neocuba to handle a prisoner exchange with their president. Two pages in, however, we learn that his ship’s pilot is actually a fanatical black ops agent with a mission of her own: assassinating said president in such a way that it looks like either an accident or a covert sov op. Which she does beautifully and without Dredd ever realizing it. And in a final bit of very sharp writing, Spurrier all but screams she did it all on Hershey’s orders.

Overall, a fair lot to unpack for a six page story. We’ve known for a while now that Hershey favours more subtle, underhanded ways of securing Mega-City One’s interests than blunt force of arms, but something about this one feels like pushing it. Maybe it’s keeping Dredd in the dark about it, or directly targeting a foreign head of state, but if it’s not crossing a line, at the very least it’s toeing it. In a way it echoes "The Chief Judge’s Man”, but having the target be an implicitly corrupt foreign leader makes it slightly less damning than murdering rebellious but innocent MC-1 citizens. And, more importantly, Spurrier decides to end the story without confirming nor denying Hershey’s involvement in it, although at the time it seemed like a sure thing.

From a six-pager to a six-episode-er as Gordon Rennie, Ian Richardson and PJ Holden bring us “House of Pain” (1485-1490, May ‘06), and what a treat it is. Right off the bat we open with Judge Alice, a street judge driving a catch wagon on the graveyard shift, being harassed by a couple of punks. Her scene is mostly set-up for Judge Guthrie’s return, but things get a lot better as the story goes along. First, with a small guest appearance by Wally Chief Judge Hollister going undercover with two others as kneepad models in a pretty funny, albeit pretty skeevy scene; then with Judge Corson, a bomb defusal specialist tek who first helps Dredd deal with a perp’s suicide box implant and later with the main villain’s offshore platform’s self-destruct; and there’s still enough space for Hershey to deliver a short lesson on law economics:

By contrast, “Jumped”, by John Smith and Simon Fraser (1491-1494, June ‘06), only has a lone unhelmeted female judge in a panel, although she is seen with a similarly unhelmeted male judge, so maybe all those fan letters about lady judges being allergic to helmets are finally having an effect. “Neoweirdies”, by Simon Spurrier and Paul Marshall, (1496-1498, July ‘06) has a couple of background sightings but also co-stars a Judge Garris as part of a team investigating murders in a pretentious weirdos competition, including a cheeky little panel of her checking out a naked contestant. Avert your eyes, lest the SJS pluck ‘em out. Spurrier also writes the Pete Doherty-drawn “Versus” (1499, August ‘06), a mostly silent tale featuring a female control judge.

Now we reach what’s probably the most important and certainly the longest story of the decade: “Origins”, by Wagner and Ezquerra (progs 1505 to 1535 -with interludes- September ‘06 to May ‘07). The premise is a heavy one: Justice Department receives a note demanding a ransom for the corpse of Judge Fargo, creator of the judge system and father of justice. With the note is a tissue sample that was taken from a living organism, so if it is indeed Fargo, he’s also alive. Chief Judge Hershey quickly sends Dredd and a team of hand-picked judges into the Cursed Earth with one billion credits and a wagon to follow the trail of the kidnappers. The team includes two female judges: the returning Judge Sanchez from “Incubus” and a Judge Waters. Of the two, Waters is definitely the most impressive, a hardened street judge who acts as Dredd’s second in command early on, leading a defensive action against an army of Mad Max extras with a very calm, matter-of-fact badass attitude that feels quite refreshing after years of more troubled, insecure judges. It also helps that Ezquerra draws her as noticeably older than Sanchez, so it’s clear from the get-go that Waters is a veteran. And near the end of the story, Waters gets another chance to shine as she orchestrates and executes the rescue of Dredd and Fargo from the renegade army of the damned. Overall, she proves herself more than worthy of being in a Brian Bolland cover.

Of course, as the name suggests, “Origins” is mostly concerned with showing the birth of the Justice Department and the events leading to Dredd’s creation, so there’s not much else there that concerns this post, save for one small but crucial page: when the young Fargo is outlining his plans for the creation of a corps of judges armed with the power to dispense instant justice to the United States senate, he specifically mentions the need for choosing “good men and women.” And on the same page we get a glimpse of an early class of judge cadets in training which also includes a couple of women. So here is confirmation that from day one the judges counted several women in their ranks, although admittedly by now this probably wasn’t terribly in doubt.

The final episode also has a predictable appearance by Hershey, who gets the unexpected privilege of being the second to last person to talk to Fargo before he finally expires. The last one, naturally, is Dredd himself, although both of them lie through their teeth about what his final words to each other were. More on that later.

Now, about those interludes. Prog 1521′s “The Sexmek Slasher” (January ‘07) by Wagner and Vince Locke features a Judge Wyler in a supporting role. And Gordon Rennie teams-up with Ian Gibson to bring us “Judgement” (1523-1528, February-March ‘07), a supernatural revenge story guest-starring Judge Anderson in one of her rare not-Grant/Wagner-scripted appearances.

(Also featuring the return of Teddy Dredd!)

The story is a tightly-written tale about a ghost judge murdering members of a crime cartel known for using psykers to mask their activities. The revenant also murders a judge but spares his partner, a Judge Bunns (could it be the same Bunns from 1983′s “Rumble in the Jungle”?), demonstrating some kind of psychic ability to tell the guilty from the innocent, although how innocent a Mega-City One judge can really be is anyone’s guess. Dredd and Anderson’s investigation reveals that the ghost is actually the enraged soul of a long-dead judge, killed by Rico Dredd before he was sent to Titan. But it’s Anderson who connects the final dot and reaches the real source of the apparition: Judge Edek, a veteran psi-judge ambushed and all but murdered by the aforementioned cartel. Crippled beyond repair and frozen in cryo-stasis in the hopes that some day technology would advance enough to heal her, some part of Edek’s consciousness remained, well, conscious, and reached out in anger to another betrayed judge in order to turn them into a revenant and get her revenge. Ultimately, Anderson reaches Edek’s chamber after fighting her way through a gorgeously drawn horde of ectoplasmic monsters and pulls the plug, while Dredd handles what remains of Judgement on his own.

Overall, “Judgement” is a very strong showing for Anderson and a great psychic/supernatural twist on the old “judge turned vigilante” premise of stories like “The Executioner” or “Raider.” Also on display is Gibson’s slight redesign of the psi judge uniform, as Anderson sports twin straight shoulderpads all the way through. According to Gibson himself, the pads helped him make her more “dynamic.” He also had a spot of trouble rendering Anderson’s new shorter haircut, first shown in Alan Grant and Arthur Ranson’s ongoing Psi Division strip in the Megazine. In his own words:

"Then, when I was back doing a Dredd for 2000ad, on a story called ‘Judgement’ ( I think ), Andy was again in the script. But someone had cut off all her lovely flowing blonde tresses, for reasons of their own. So I had to render her thus.”

Rounding up this post we have a trio of short done-in-ones: “Fifty-Year Man” (Wagner and Patrick Goddard, prog 1536, May ‘07) has a female judge, perhaps a public relations administrator, as head of a team putting together a retrospective of Dredd’s fifty years on the streets, with some predictably disastrous results. In a similar vein, a journalist is arrested by a Judge Socks (maybe, her badge is hard to read) after going insane trying to write a biography of Dredd in “The Biographer”, Rob Williams’ first appearance in this project (with Boo Cook, 1537, idem). And we end in a note of tragedy with “The Incident”, by Robbie Morrison and Richard Elson (1538, idem). The story kicks off when undercover Judge Ferrara has her cover blown and is kidnapped by assassins who use a nano-virus to destroy the high tech implant wire on her brain that she’d being using to spy on their boss. Unfortunately for her, both PSU and Dredd are too slow to reach her, and the virus erases her mind. One seriously bleak story, although we do get to see Elson draw some seriously unique uniforms for the Control judges:

In our next episode: the hardest part to write for me. Also, the most important female judge of the new millennium has her prog debut.

[wingsoverbros]

"All along the Watchtower - are disappointed watchers" or "My thoughts on SPN 12.23"

As the finale night was a double episode, I split up the reviews to handle one at a time. This time, it's the last one. The link to the first episode is in the list of links below, but I'll put it here as well. On to our second episode of the evening, and our last episode of season 12.

Sorry this comes so late after the episode aired, but the episode was distressful enough to require some time and contemplation (and one decent spoiler with same-con confirmation) to digest. The end result otherwise would have been unreadable  (essentially, a massive rant on the writers and fridging.) You'll see some of what's left of the rant below, with the rest of the rewritten and much more comprehensible (and significantly less overwrought) article. Please enjoy.

For previous episodes: 12.01 - 12.02 - 12.03 - 12.04 - 12.05 - 12.06 - 12.07 - 12.08 - 12.09 - 12.10 - 12.11 - 12.12 - 12.13 - 12.14 - 12.15 - 12.16 - 12.17 - 12.18 - 12.19 - 12.20 - 12.21 - 12.22

Now, on to Supernatural 12.23 - "All along the watchtower"

In the early years, the titles of the episodes actually predicted the plot of the attached episodes, a fact that boosted many a discussion on the forum boards. Eventually, they (generally) stopped matching the episodes they were attached to, so people stopped paying attention to them. So when the episode title for this episode was released, I paid it no mind. Who would have expected the episode to actually be inspired by the title?

"All along the Watchtower" is a Bob Dylan song that goes into circular loop. It draws the listen back to the beginning of the story. In the episode, things go horribly wrong, leaving Sam and Dean facing an unknown potential enemy alone, family either lost to extreme danger in an alternative universe or left as a charcoal smudge in the mud. The questions we need to ask are "Which beginning did we return to - Season 4 or season 7?" and "What happens to the lost characters? Who are we getting back, and how?"

Supernatural over the years has gotten a terrible reputation for fridging all the hero female characters in the show. Starting off killing Mary and Jess in the pilot was a terrible way to start the series, but could be seen as necessary. The same could not be said with all the other women that have followed them. Dean had a guest character named Layla to feel bad about in season 1, but at least they didn't show her die. Madison, a memorable Monster-of-the-week, dies to further Sam's angst in season 2. Bela was killed in season 3 simply because the writers had no idea how to write her. Then the writers started getting really obnoxious.  Ellen and Jo died in season 5, simply to ratchet up the stress levels for the guys. And whenever the guys need a good haranguing, the writers pull out one of them for one of the guys (usually Dean) to angst over.

Sadly, although the depth and quality of the female characters have slowly improved over the years, the ways and timing of their deaths has gotten worse. One of the best characters invented in the show's run, one of the few good parts of dire mess that was season 7, ended up getting slaughtered in a particularly insensitive way solely to further Dean's conflict with Sam. (Who the hell thought it was a good idea for a lesbian to get slaughtered in a bathtub by a Nazi associate?) The delightful Witch twin, Alicia Banes, and her mother both get killed to give the male twin (Max) and Dean each a chance to navel gaze and make poor decisions. Eileen, a kick-ass deaf hunter, gets killed by an invisible dog controlled by a refugee from a 1950s secret society in the first 5 minutes without a single line, a rather disrespectful moment that actually reminded me of the horrible opening of “Hello, Cruel World” in season 7.

And now, in the last episode, they continued the mistreatment of characters with how they treated Rowena. I expected her to die, yes. I was disappointed, but I expected it. But what they did? Lucifer is evil, certainly, but the excessive violence in that seemed pointlessly cruel. At least they didn't show the active violence on screen, that'd have been worse. The whole idea just threw me right out of the episode, making me flash back to my one attempt to watch "Pan's Labyrinth", where the scene of the fascist stepfather doing to the peasant what Luci says he did to Rowena in this caused me to abandon the idea of watching altogether.

I'm so tired of watching everyone drown in blood and fire. It all just seems so freaking unnecessary. I was expecting Kelly to die, considering how they beat it into our heads all season, but I'm not looking forward to them likely using it to give Jack something to angst over next year. And what was the purpose of causing Mary to get sucked into the other dimension? They turned Mary into a massive Macguffin for the guys to aim at recovering, *if* they can do so. Considering what they did to the rest of the cast, it was unnecessary. With her loss, Crowley's suicide, and Cas's murder, there was just too many shocking experiences for any one event to have a good impact. If any of those had been removed from the list, the ending would have just as shocking, but far easier to digest without resulting in anger and rebellion from the audience. (Personally, I'd have gone with Mary in the Alt Universe and Crowley dead, and leave Cas alive. Hell, even if Cas was in the Alt Universe with Mary, it'd have been better.) The finale just seemed excessive.

At the time of the episode airing, the episode had once again reverted to the "really depends" status it was at the end of season 3. It really depended on what they do about fixing Cas. Despite the fact that the current set of show-runners hadn't (yet) lied to us and that Cas would likely be back next season, considering Misha is still signed for the series, I was concerned. I was worried that they'd pull another Midnight PR release about his role being "reduced" like after 6.22. Thankfully, that didn't happen, and Jared's accidental spoiler at JIB 2017 relieved my nerves about Misha's continued involvement in the show. Hopefully, they're aiming for some sort of surprise that's closer to season 4 then the horrible idea that was season 7. (More Cas, good writing, and a memorable set of characters and plot... not a loss of support and an endless supply of bad dick jokes.)

It didn't help that Castiel was written as rather severely off-center in this episode. I spent a large amount of time convinced that Cas had been replaced by a illusion-clouded Lucifer or Alternative Universe Cas because of that, but his character would subsequently swing back to normal each time, pointing to at least most of it being nothing but bad characterization on the writers part.

"All along the Watchtower" has one character reassure another that they've been through this before, and "this is not our fate". It also seems to leave out parts of the story, telling us the beginning and the end, but not the middle. You never find out what the events are that they are watching for, what the two in the song are discussing, just that people are watching and preparing and that the two central characters realize they'll get through it. So does that mean that although things look similar to before, a few things will change, go in a better direction? If So, what and for whom? Who is coming with? (Better have Cas in the group going forward.) And what haven't we been told that will effect how we see the episode once we know it? (And which character is the joker and which one is the thief?)

Or is the title and the "alone again" circular nature of the ending the only thing they borrowed from the song? Only time will tell.

Now, this is clearly not the end of the story. There's too many questions, and its finale status means I can't tell if it's well-written or not. If it hadn't have been the finale, it wouldn't have been, with all the unanswered questions and the characters acting a bit off. This is a shame, frankly, because the season started out well. The first episodes of the season had promise, and a number of the episodes (both arc and filler) were quite well-done. Sadly, the quality degraded sharply over the season, especially in the last few episodes of the season.

Among the many questions:

What did Cas say to Kelly that last time? Did it have anything to do with why he suddenly acted in a frankly somewhat brainless manner at the end of the episode, or was that just terrible writing?

Why did he go in and stab Luci when he *knows* his blade won't do anything? Cas is brilliant, so he's much too smart to do something that useless unless there was a purpose to it. He's fought Archangels before, and if he knows his blade would do jack against Michael or Raphael, why think it'll do anything but annoy Lucifer?

Lucifer is a bit one-note for the second half of this season, don't you think? Every time he's upstairs, it's "let's start the Apocalypse!" Raphael and Micheal were the same way. The Archs are rather dull and plodding sorts, with the exception of Gabriel. Can we trade Luci for Gabe?

Why did Cas come through the portal but not move out of the way? He had to realize that Luci was still there and had the potential of coming through after him.

It struck me that Cas and Mary are the only two characters that dealt with the pregnant Kelly in this episode. Does Jack remember them? (It's documented that babies recognize voices they've heard in the womb) Will he bring back Cas and help save Mary as a result of remembering they wanted to help him? And considering he would have heard the Winchesters trying to figure out how to de-power him, how much will they have to bargain to get him to act?

Jack being an adult at birth does work with the adult Jane in “Clip Show“ in season 8, but still directly contradicts the “The kid is a Nephilim” bit in “Lily Sunder has some Regrets”, one of the better episodes in this very season. The issue makes Cas and the other angels look like morons this season. Do *none* of the writers in this show ever talk to each other?

I was actually sad to see that the dusty world we saw in the promos was not, in fact, the Empty. Why spend so much of the last few years yelling about that if you're never gonna pay out on it? Instead, the dusty world was an alternative dimension where the guys never existed, a fact that made very little sense. If the guys were so important that no one else could be the true vessels in season 5, then how did it start in the alternative universe? Did John have some sort of distant cousin with kids who didn't have the same level of character? And why was the alternative world essentially a clone of the tv show "Dominion", styled to look like the battlefield sequence from the Prophecy movie series - A world of dust, sand, writhing beings on spikes and where Angels and Demons are not only exaggerated but enemies of what is left of humanity. (That comment about Baby Ear necklaces on the Angels was horrifying.)

Speaking of which, I was actually interested in the fact that demons in the alternative world had black eyes, piranha teeth and horns. If that happened to the demons, what do the angels look like? Do they have sometimes-visible wings and auras? It had to be noticeable, if Bobby could tell the difference between one of them and Cas. And can one of them bring Cas back? (Or can Chuck or Amara come back and do it? They do still owe the guys a few favors, in my opinion.)

From the statements in the episode and what we saw with the alternative version of Bobby, clearly people exist in both universes independent of each other. Since Mary and Bobby existed independently, and Azazel existed there (killing Mary over there at about the same time as our Azazel killed John), would Cas? What would he look like? Could that one that was stabbed be him rather then ours? What about Gabriel?

A few Observations:

The way Crowley died, martyring himself like Meg, actually made me rather sad. Going out like that redeemed the character, but it really pointed to the corroding nature of the Winchesters. Everyone they touch ends up going out with a whimper, often throwing themselves into the gears of the machine to try to buy the guys a few moments, which usually goes squandered. Why more characters don't just run when they see them coming, I'll never know.

The Winchesters actually failed utterly in this episode. They've lost both Cas and Mary, they failed to fix Jack or Kelly beforehand, and now are faced with an uncontrollable and unknown power who could be either the most powerful ally they've ever had or the worst enemy they have ever faced with no direction and no immediate allies on hand. And they've lost their only family (Mary and Cas). They've lost, despite besting Lucifer.

The current story-line possibilities are giving me bad flashbacks of the Jasmine story-line on Angel (I hated that story-line). I'm really hoping that they have a better idea then that.

They never resolved the death of Billie the Reaper and the "Cosmic consequences" it would supposedly bring on Cas. Could that be how he comes back? Or did the writers just plain forget? (Wouldn't surprise me, to be honest.)

In a previous review, I remarked that I didn't want to see Cas attached to any fire-covered ceilings or water-covered floors. So, of course, they killed him standing up in front of a door. Not cool, Supernatural.

I must admit to being tickled that when faced with a Doorway to another dimension, Dean's immediate response was "like Narnia?" That would be a reference he'd be familiar with, considering all his time hiding in that wardrobe.

Cas rented a house using the id "James Novak". Again, I'm mystified by the fact he can do that, considering Jimmy's disappearance, and the visual ties to the massacre in season 7 and Claire's disappearance in season 10. The police work in this show is either amazingly lax, or else the cops in this series (the male ones, anywho. Sheriffs Mills and Hanscum are awesome.) are morons.

Cas says that Jack showed him "a world without war, hunger, pain..." This sounds all well and good, until you remember that there are other ways to achieve that beyond creating a Utopia. After all, until people figured out the code and unhooked themselves and others, the Matrix would have been really peaceful as well.

Back in season 7, I discovered that the only way to deal with the stress of the crap the writers threw our way was by diverting myself into fan videos and fan fiction. This episode did a number on my nerves, especially towards the end, so immediately after it ended, I watched a cas fan vid to try to cheer myself up. I'd forgotten that the video opened with the scene of Casifer threatening Crowley in Rowena's presence in 11.10. The sight of all three on the screen actually made it worse. I ended up speed reading 3 fluffy AU Destiel fics to try to feel better. (Personal tip: Don't watch any fan video using "Dust in the Wind" as its song after watching this episode. You'll drown in the angst.)

In the end, the finale episode of season 12 left me generally unsatisfied, bothered by severe character mistreatment and far too many unanswered questions to truly enjoy it. Whither or not it's improved by time and the start of season 13 depends on many variables, and that uncertainty makes me uneasy. I hope, however, that 13.01 at least rights some of the wrongs of this episode and season, although some of it will only be solved by hard work and an improvement in general writing and leadership skills by the folks that create the series.

I guess we'll just have to wait and see.

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Well, this has been the finale episode review of season 12. I still have a general season overlook and writer scorecard post I'm working on, and I'll put that up as soon as I can. It may be one big piece, or perhaps in chunks. It depends on the size.

Keep an eye out. :)