#and sorta ends up losing his faith in himself | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

renoxvated · 7 months ago

Text

•(modernverse only) Roy’s favorite pastimes are drinking, listening to Stevie Nicks and eating cereal out of a solo cup. He doesn’t watch too much t.v. but on rare occasions you’ll usually catch him watching wrestling or reality shows. In both instances he talks to the t.v. a lot.

Roy doesn’t believe in God, or anything really. Not lady luck, fate or any superstitious mumbo jumbo. He doesn’t typically put his faith or trust in anything but himself, and even that’s debatable at times. When he was younger he did tend to think superstitious stuff was cool however, like witches and werewolves; though he quickly grew out of that phase.

• Roy isn’t really afraid of much, he figures that fear will just cripple you, make you weak, make you end up dead— in a sense one might say that makes him fear death; to some degree that isn’t wrong. Roy doesn’t want to die, but not because he totally fears death. His real fear is a lose of control, this fear comes in many forms and extends to others. Such as his fear of not being able to control outcomes with others, like their deaths for instance. He feels as though he can decide when to die, his own stubbornness and drive for survival makes him sure he’ll never die unless he’s willing. He also goes out of his way with his ferocity when protecting others he cares for—leading him to see overprotectiveness.

• Surprisingly Roy can, at times, be a very calm person. Usually when he’s by himself and not all worked up over something, he enjoys taking long walks in the Mojave— often getting lost for days at a time, but he always finds his way back. He also likes to spend time listening to old holotape tunes while fixing various things he can find. He tends to take a lot of naps and on a number of occasions sleeps outside in the wide open of his own volition. Though most of the things that calm him might be rather dangerous, he is either unaware or doesn't care.

10 Questions: (In Character)

What is your favorite word?:

“Roy, maybe I’m selfish, but I like hearing my name. It means someone notices me, good or bad I don’t care.”

What is your least favorite word?:

“Sorry, everyone expects me to apologize for how I act, I’m done apologizing for everything I do. Don’t like me, then just move on sunshine. Alternatively, I’m tired of people apologizing in the first place, what’s done is done, don’t change nothing.”

What turns you on?:

“Fighting, ya’ know the thrill of being alive, nothing makes you feel more alive than that. Any kind of attention.”

What turns you off?:

“Collars, fuck that shit I ain’t your dog.”

What sound do you love?:

“The sound of someone's heart racing, as bullshit as that sounds.”

What sound do you hate?:

“You running your mouth asking me this shit. The rattling of chains…the sound of children screaming, snapping of a belt.”

What is your favorite curse word?:

“Probably shit or fuck. I curse a fuckin’ shitton.”

What profession other than yours would you like to attempt?:

“Always thought it’d make for a good fighter, like you hear they used to have in those sorta prized fights before the nukes went off. Seen old flyers, coulda’ totally been one of those wrestling guys. Kicked all their pansy asses.”

What profession would you not like to do?:

“What I’m currently doing now, but what else can I do? This keeps a decent meal coming without having to kill anyone and steal it.”

If heaven exists, what would you like to hear God(s) say when you arrive at the pearly gates?:

“He ought to say sorry…or maybe I should.”

Something most people don’t know about you?:

“Oh I don’t know, that I like sunsets and long walks on the beach, isn’t that the kinda shit you want me to say? Most people don’t know for a reason, most people need to mind their own business.”

If you were one of the seven sins which would you be?:

“Gluttony I guess, shit I don’t know…nothing is ever enough, food, sex, drugs, whatever… I need more. I live a very hollow and shallow existence, I’m never satisfied. I want it all and I want more.”

Sexual Preference?

“Whatever wants to fuck me I guess? Like I give a shit long as you got a pulse and either a dick or tits.”

What position do they sleep in?:

“However the hell I’m layin’ when I’m rolling around in bed, what’s it to you?”

If you died, do you think anyone would care? Do you think anyone would even notice? You'd just be another package lost in the mail.

“Preachin’ to the choir honey. Tellin’ me shit I already know, next you’re probably gonna’ tell me I’m trash right? I’ve heard it all baby, nobody cares about me. But too bad, cause I’m so unnoticed that this trash hasn’t ended up in the can yet. Fuckers like you that like to nose around and point things out, are just gonna have to be stuck with smell.” Roy laughs, he’s been hearing things like this all his life, nobody could think he was more worthless than himself. He’s learned to find the irony in that hilarious.

Holla bby let me snap a collar on ur neck! that goes beep beep beep boom when u try to run away from me xoxoxo

Roy twitches, his fingers curl up and his nails dig into his palms. He’s visibly seething underneath the surface. But as soon as the anger bubbles up, it simmers back down. He responds with cool efficiency, brushing it off sarcastically. “Listen here sunshine, I wouldn’t let crazy like you anywhere near me, try to put a collar on me and I’ll snap your neck with it.” As if Roy had any right to call someone else crazy.

ook over there! it's a kid getting mauled by a molerat. Don't let it die like your niece :)

“Where the hell did you hear that from— you’re just a regular piece of shit aren’t you buddy? Well why don’t I break your legs, then call that molerat over and let it eat you alive. Preferably starting with that loud mouth of yours.”

Three things that your muse loves doing in their free time.

Fighting; although he’ll deny that he does and claim he doesn’t like to start shit, but it’s all he’s ever really known and in a way it brings him comfort.

Hunting; as it’s an outlet for his aggression and a source of food, something that was scarce for him as a child.

Repairing things; because it’s something he can do that makes him feel like he’s fixing something more than ruining it.

Four people that your muse loves.

Roy doesn’t really love anyone, at least anymore; I don’t think he’s fully capable of even knowing what love is, much less understanding it and feeling it. He loved his brother and niece, but will forever feel nothing but regret and self hatred when he thinks about them. So I think because of that he would associate love with those emotions. He’s honestly not emotionally stable enough to properly love someone back in an easy or healthy way, to top it off his parents socially stunted him, by not reinforcing the proper things into him. I do think he still has the capacity to love still, (in a way that is not a traditional sense for sure!) but the kind of affection he brings to the table makes it really unhealthy for either party involved.

Three fond childhood memories.

The one birthday his mother didn’t forget, it was his tenth, he came home to a makeshift cake and a Grognak The Barbarian comic; he couldn’t read it but she did once for him, he would years later burn the comic after the death of his mother.

The spare occasions that his older brother would be home, offering him attention that their parents neglected to give him.

Although it isn’t really a childhood memory; playing and taking care of his niece, surprisingly Roy was rather delicate and sweet to the little girl, who he viewed almost as his own child, or something akin to a little sister. He’d take her fishing, or relent into her silly little tea parties; spending time with her almost made him forget that they lived in a wasteland.

Two things your muse regrets.

Never fighting back against his father’s abuse.

The death of his niece and not being able to prevent it when he knows he could have.

One thing they’d go through heaven or hell to save/change.

He would give his own worthless life up, if it meant he could bring back his niece.

#ooc: just a few old posts from my old roy blog i wanted to post here for reference.#re: how cruel is the golden rule ; headcanons

1 note · View note

kob131 · 2 years ago

Note

Unfortunately this isn’t Monkey 60, it’s someone else. The big issue that manga made and I can see it is how ultimately nothing matter. Don’t mistake my intentions, loving who you are is a great message but when the message involves a character being ignored while showing signs of heavy depression to the point of being not alive (I’m hoping this phrase is okay) and them magically getting over it feels sorta disgusting. It’s like a bad form of coping that I feel is more toxic than positive and the writers are trying to paint it like committing not alive (again I’m hoping this phrase is okay) and being reborn makes all the problems go away.

Thanks for coming back Anon.

And considering you're talking to a guy whose had suicidal thoughts and has depression- you could have just said 'comitting suicide' and it would have been fine.

I hope you see this because I'm gonna be bearing a lot here.

I feel like Kamen doesn't understand the complexities of depression and suicidal thoughts.

The mentioning of how Ruby's friends and family don't show concern for Ruby? That's not true. They do show concern for Ruby. Everyone is visibly uncomfortable when Ruby gives the parting line at the end of V9 E2. Blake tries to comfort Ruby during E7 and remind her of staying cheerful. Yang...does this three fucking times.

Do you want to know what Ruby herself does each time? She rejects them. She pushes them away or shoots down their concerns. Then she explodes on them for things that are either not their fault or just trying to move on.

RUby wasn't ignored- She felt ignored because she was isolating herself.

And just as well- Only Ruby could pull herself out of that slump. Only Ruby could pull herself out of that hole she dug herself in. Only Ruby could overcome that.

'But isn't it really wrong to just have your character magically get over suicidal depression after a small talk?'

Maybe. But you know what would be worse than Ruby's situation?

Losing the only man who ever believed in you, showed faith in you and guided you. Your so-called comrades not only TRULY ignore your pain, one of them even says that you're at fault for his death because you had an emotional episode and he died saving you. And all he gets is a minor call out by his sister. But you getting up in your friend's face, putting blame on him for your bro's death because of his religion? That's a big no-no. And the only person to actually try talking to you is some girl you found about a day ago. But hey, it's all better now! The girl you use to have a crush on told a story about your bro that you might have not even heard and you're all better after a speech!

I mean, what awful, no good, poorly written, obscure trash could that even be-

Oh. It's not only one of the most well remembered scenes in one of the most well beloved recent anime-

It's the story of the character who inspired me to keep living.

Yeah, I wasn't just saying bullshit to defend RWBY when I said I've had suicidal thoughts. That is something i legitimately went through. Back when i was in high school, with depression destroying my motivation to work on my grades, my mom screaming her head off at me about how I was ruining my life, how I hated how angry and temperamental I was. I legitimately thought about sliting my wrists and walking out into the snow to die.

And then i caught Kill La Kill on Toonami at my grandpa's house. I thought it looked cool so I looked it up and found Gurren Lagann. And I binged watched it. I watched a kid who went through far worse than me, finding himself in as deep a hole as me. And he pulled himself out. He found the will to keep living, to keep fighting, to break through any wall in front of him. And by the end, Simon was a true hero.

And that inspired to keep living.

I'm sorry but the arguments Kamen and so many make about Ruby's arc would also apply to Simon's. That there's no self reflection? Simon proceeds to do reckless bullshit throughout the series.

That no one cares about them and no one reflects on how they affected them? Team Dai-Gurren legitimately NEVER check up on Simon or try talking to him. NIA did more for him than they did and she knew him for a fucking day.

That what they did to them was toxic? Gee, at least Team RWBY admitted they may have made a mistake. Kittan, the guy who threw Kamina's death into Simon's face, acts like he always knew he was okay and he suffers no consequences for his actions.

That they're magically okay afterwards? Trying to show me a picture of Ruby coming back and Simon coming back would be like that Office meme- they're the same damn picture.

In every regard, for me to accept that RWBY fucked up would be to accept that Gurren Lagann fucked up as bad if not WORSE. And that doesn't work considering it resonated with me enough to keep going.

So I hope you understand why I don't think these arguments work. Especially since I know quite a few of these guys are Gurren Lagann fans.

5 notes · View notes

theoneandonlyduskstrike · 6 months ago

Text

Ramblings Reuploaded #3

Sonic Vs the Concept of Entropy

Hello faithful followers. I think some of you might even read these! Time for another one in the losely defined series where I take my musing from dms and the like and make them into a more readable form for everyone.

Last "Episode" was my trans story for the trans day of visibility.

This time, sandwhiching the trans one between two layers of sonic, we're gonna be talking about that hedgehog today. I told myself i'd clear my backlog of things I was supposed to post today, so here we are. Be aware of obvious spoilers for the entire game and dlc, and with that in mind: Once again we start our story anew.

To begin we need to resummarize Sonic Frontier's overall plot. It's sorta important if we're going to view the plot right? This is from memory so some mistakes inbound (The original draft said you find tails on the first island. yikes.)

Sonic wakes up on a mysterious island after managing to escape some cyber space area. A voice in his head guides him onward. He has two goals: fight the Titans like the voice said to and help his friends You find Amy first locked in a strange prison which is not pleasant to the touch. She will not react. When you eventually free her some dark energy from it flies into sonic. This is known as cyber corruption.

So here's begins the gameplay loop: find your friend, free them, spend some time helping them work through their insecurities and problems, and then get the emeralds to fight each islands Titan By number three sonic is in some serious pain from so the corruption he took on but he refuses to stop. Eventually he's forced to as he attempts to climb these huge pillars under the guidance of the voice His friends sacrifice themselves (temporarily) to stabilize him so he can finish what needs done.

This is the story of frontiers. But it's not the whole story of frontier. There's a character we haven't mentioned. The island.

This place is in absolute ruins but the technology there is far superior to anything else in sonics world. Even eggman thinks it's well beyond him. So why aren't they here now? How did they go out? On the second island there's cannons. Was it a war?? Is there a second even more powerful group. Spoilers the answer is no but we'll get there. Speaking of egghead, he was also trapped in cyber space while investigating the island. He even created something using it. An advanced entity named sage. She's child like but seems to have the secrets to the island. She keeps warning eggman of some looming catastrophe. She's also hostile to sonic but never directly attacks him. She doesn't believe he's important until he starts to prove himself again and again during said gameplay loop With that we're at the point where we left off and this all starts to make sense. An entity we still doing know the name of attacked the ancients a long time ago. They managed to seal it in cyber space but it's trying to get out. The Titans were how they fought it, and how they sealed it away with both their souls and their lives. This was also the thing guiding sonic all along.

Sonic won't stand for this deception of course. A temporary truce, sage even tells them about the thing where they can stabilize sonic, and the group agrees to a plan. Get that last secret Titan and use it and super sonic to fight whatever it is the ancients put away.

Now we can talk about our decieptful true antagonist. We can talk about the end.

The end literally doesn't look like much. It's a big purple moon?? And if I had a nickel for every time the moon was a final boss… Well nevermind. The important thing here is it's dialogue. The sole reason this rant exists So. Here it is. I recommend listening to the whole thing. But I'll try to go over it in part. The writing is probably better then anything I've ever wrote. But it won't stay that way with any luck.

youtube

Here I must admit i'm cheating a little. The scientific theory of it which is a little complicated but basically systems form around chaos until they reach a stable point. Order from chaos. Check. a friend pointed out chaos is important in sonic, and they're right. "Chaos is power enriched by the heart" after all. This could be entropy stands in oposition of that, being a creation of order.

However the second version i've heard is the idea of a universal drift. As the universe spreads out forever, stars and planets get pushed further and further apart. This is also entropy, and more specifically what I had in mind. This also fits the infinite part and how it destroys things This was what the ancients couldn't fight without destroying themselves. A universal concept so far beyond us all. They gave those lives in an attempt to chain it

It is also the cause of cyber corruption and the reason sonics friends had to give themselves for him. Unity wins again and the past resembles the future. The message is clear: keep fighting no matter what

But the message wasn't complete. Sonic team wasn't done and we still need to talk about the alternate ending, and two pretty good songs

Don't be afraid, I will be with you.

I had wanted to wait until I played this expansion in case new information contradicted me. I formed this theory entirely based on the main ending. Thankfully It actually helped me make sense of some holes in my earlier logic.

The short of it is the come up with a separate plan. Sonics friends come out but take on some of his cyber corruption. They go search for the emeralds while sonic instead goes through grueling training. Climbing huge towers only to meet with the original pilots of each titan. They're kinda pissed and force sonic to prove his skill and dedication so they can make sure he will carry in the values they hold the dearest. Finally after a really difficult one sonic is ready to turn cyber corruption into power. This well be the edge he needs. The end re appears but there's no new dialogue from it so we don't need to talk about that. (disapointingly) Of note is everything goes better overall this time with everyone working and struggling together and I want to examine WHY. Time for the music. We're gonna look at the lyrics for", I'm here" which is associated with the 4th Titan, Supreme. A version of this also plays during the fight in this dlc, which is the end possessing Supreme and therefore manipulating them in a more dirrect way then with sonic.

youtube

I like this version better. The lyrics are the exact same. Go listen to the refrain version after you finish this read.

leave the life you knew before. See..a new world worth fighting for. Find the truth of who I'm meant to become. Another path, I must now walk on

This lines up with entropy in a strange way. If we're right and the planets are moving apart, things literally can't stay like they are forever. We'll have to adapt but that doesn't mean it's not going to be

I'm here Reaching far across these new frontiers With my life I fight this fear In my hands I hold the ones I love Walk forward through the cold dawn Always to new horizons(edited)

The cold dawn line is literally too on the nose for this theory but I think my theory is mostly my own rather then text so we'll move on

"With my life I fight this fear" and "in my hands I hold the ones I love" represents both sonics struggle and why he keeps going anyways. We're approaching something we've never seen before. But our love makes it worth it

And to finish my point for me

Once again we'll start our story anew.

Don't be afraid I will be with you.

So that's it. That's what we're meant to do. Entropy will come for us. We can fight against it, sacrifice a lot, and live on. Or we can adapt to it, use it the best we can, and live a new way yet unknown to us. But number one thing we'll need is the strength of each other

The ancients chose the first like sonic and crew did, but in the second ending another way was chosen and that's why things went better in this ending compared to the first (sage is implied to be dead in the original ending) But the second way will be much much harder. It's gonna be a struggle for everyone Following the second ending sonic is filled with a clarity of what he's meant to do now. And so we look at our second song "one way dream"

It could be considered to be a generic motivational song but given it's context I think it adds a lot to all this.

youtube

I'm just gonna leave you with the chorus. It says everything i need to.

Boost your spirit off the ground I'm a spark that won't go out We can go much higher now Gravity can't hold us down We're only at the begining of this one way dream.

What can I say? In the face of an existential threat this is how we ignite.

#sonic #sonic frontiers #blog post #rambling reuploaded #Youtube

1 note · View note

tolkien-feels · 2 years ago

Note

"Aragorn is a big symbol of mortality in the movies... He straight up has an entire fake death arc." Why are you so smart. I've been annoyed at "Aragorn falls off a cliff a little bit" for (checks notes) 20 years and you just made it fit thematically!? o.o

Aww thank you, that's so sweet! But yeah, I feel really strongly about it! In fact, you've activated my rambling mode, hold on!

You know when Boromir says "You were quick enough to trust the elves. Have you so little faith in your own people? Yes, there is weakness. There is frailty. But there is courage also, and honor to be found in men. But you will not see that. You are afraid! All your life, you have hidden in the shadows. Scared of who you are, of what you are"? And Aragorn just immediately calls Minas Tirith "your" city (as opposed to "our")? Yeah. For me that's the core of movie!Aragorn's character.

You see, this may seem obvious, but..... movie!Aragorn was not raised by book!Elrond. He was raised by movie!Elrond. Strider!Aragorn does nothing but echo Elrond's "Men are weak." speech, over and over. Even his conflict with Arwen is not (as it is in the books) about him hesitating to separate her from her family, but rather about him not wanting her to die, not wanting her to share his mortal fate. (It doesn't get much clearer than that scene that is like - hey what happened to Luthien? "She died.")

If you'll allow me a conspiracy theory, I would propose that Aragorn's arc is the movie trilogy is:

FotR: Yes, there is weakness. -> Men are easy to corrupt. Isildur's shadow looms large, Boromir is seduced by the Ring, the Black Riders ("kings of Men" as Aragorn calls them) are a major threat. Aragorn watches Boromir ultimately triumph against temptation, and he himself lets Frodo go, rejecting the Ring in an inversion of Isildur's claim.

TTT: There is frailty. -> Men are easy to kill. Yeah, everybody in Rohan is really honorable! They're also very easy to kill, honor or not. We see that even Aragorn, Chosen One as he kinda sorta is, is one stroke of bad luck away from literally falling off a cliff and dying. "Then I shall die as one of them!" is, as far as I can recall, the first time Aragorn identifies not as A Man Of Gondor, but just as A Man. That he shouts this at an elf, switching from Sindarin to the Common Tongue is very meaningful.

RotK: But there is courage also, and honor to be found in men. -> Payoff to all this setup!!! Aragorn literally stands there and shouts - "Sons of Gondor, of Rohan, my brothers… I see in your eyes the same fear that would take the heart of me. A day may come when the courage of men fails, when we forsake our friends and break all bonds of fellowship, but it is not this day. An hour of wolves and shattered shields when the age of men comes crashing down! But it is not this day! This day we fight! By all that you hold dear on this good earth, I bid you stand, Men of the West!"

So yeah!! I don't think the fake death arc is just to randomly raise the stakes. I think it was an attempt to show Aragorn facing his own frailty, nearly dying and then coming back and pretty much immediately readying himself for a battle he's pretty sure will end in his own death. It's not that Aragorn wasn't willing to risk his life before - he was - but then, it was "I face death because I'm trying to not be as weak as other Men have been, losing their honor to buy a long life" but by TTT, that has changed to "Because I'm a Man I face death willingly, even if it cuts my life short"

While the movies aren't perfect, I actually think they did a great job remembering that if Elrond has an anti-mortal bias, it's only natural that Aragorn would have an anti-mortal bias, and him overcoming that could be an interesting arc to see play out on screen. It's nothing like the books, of course, but I never expect adaptations to be, and I like the slowburn of movie!Aragorn's arc

89 notes · View notes

narsicen · 3 years ago

Text

College au!—straykids edition

small A/N side note: yES, so i was like “why not make my first headcanon?” right and yeah here we are. so i want to be able to let you guys know that you can request headcanons like these or under the same au! but with a different group! so yeah enjoy! this will be split into 2 parts sincE it wiLL gEt LONGGGG. enjoy!

genre: fluffy stuffy, college au!

warning: nothing aside from math and some jerky students/profs.

word count: about 2-4K (for all)

GN y/n!!! x skz!!!

Bang Chan

sweetest college bf out in your campus like WHATTTTT???

you ask yourself how lucky you have to be to gET soMEOnE LIke hIMMMM bC HSIHISIJf

anyway (sorry)

so basically would wait for you at your department’s building, like just outside the door of your building bc aparently the student council won’t let other students who arent in your course to go inside (</3)

he loves to give you his signature smile and like get giddy whenever he sees you bc he thinks youre the sun of his life like he will get tired (even if he naturally alrdy is) like super tired if he doesnt see you. :(

whenever you come out of your classes he would straight up hug you and then just ask you if you want something to drink something or some ice cream.

he’s majoring in bachelor of arts in music prod. program (fancy i know)

anyWAY so he sorta got invited to be in fine arts but he follows his heart and lets just say some people (not his parents) really disscouraged him to go to mUSic

BUT WE HAVE YOU AND THATS NO MORE PROBLEM FOR CHAN

you supported him ALL THE WAY and that just made him fall deeper in love with you

hes the type to be obvlivious to others asking him out because he literally cant see himself with anyoone else than with you and just think theyre joking or being nice. (JHDIJFHHWDJFJD)

like he would just focus on you (not in a possesive like creepy way) he just thinks youre amazing and shiz and he loves you for that and he supports your gut feeling bc he has that much faith and hope for you

i swear if you break his heart

anYWay

he LOVES LOVES

to just dress up in sweats everyday and you ask yourself how he can just go to a fancy dinner with you with a hoodie in his bag “incase” it rains he said but ended up wearing it over his casual fit

but you love him anyway

so you have to come to his dorm every once a week at least to keep him in check bc lbr (lets be real) he literally would choke on like idk cereal bars for breakfast lunch and dinner bc thats the easiest he can find in his cabinet

you open his cabinet and its just cereal bars

HE KEEPS THIS DINO PLUSHY (the one like his drawing) AND HE LETS YOU TAKE IT WITH U DURING EXAM WEEK BC HE KNOWS HE CANT SNEAK TO YOUR DORM AND THEYRE STRICTER SO THATS LIKE HIS SPECIAL AGENT TO COMFORT YOU

and we all know you just love to hug it and just take a breather

his scent is so comforting to you can you not

you once identitfied it as home so when you went to his hometown to visit him when he was on a leave, you sniffed the air when u got in and u said to him

“this doesnt smell like home..?”

“what does home supposed to smell then?”

‘Your colone or something”

and he just found that so cute and comforting idk dhhfkjshkcs

hE lOVES to eat what you cook because iT WAS YOUR PASSION TO COOK WTV THE HELL WAS IN YO FRIDGE

but you took up what your parents wanted bc you stated to yourself “mom and dad will get sad if i dont take this :(“

what a pure soul you are omg

anYWAy

so YESSS but you also realized you get hella tired when you do cook for a long time and youre more like booksmart or something (youre just so used to studying and reading a bunch of books)

but chan asks you to cook anyway because he doesnt want you to lose your passion and you appreciate him sm for that

even if your pancakes be crusty as hell he’d appreciate it bc bro he hasnt eaten real food in like weeks, months if you will

and he just gives you such a sweet smile when he eats

omg

and then he just showers you in compliments

okay but like he loves to show you his finished music/work because you're so down to earth he gets inspiration from you like dang bro

AND YOU LOVE HIS WORKS

as you should tho

so he gets all shy and giddy bc hes worked so hard on it and he cant wait to show his prof.

lowkey wants to write songs about you

which he has done but he couldnt bring himself to tell you about it or make the beat like EDMs or somethng

he like uses soft instruments if you get me

crying idk how to explain

but he like plays the guitar for your songs, ukelele or something

just sweet stUFFF

and its always about how you saved him from choosing the bad decisions and getting caught up in people’s dirt that they throw at him

omg

he gives you his hats

no hoodies bc thats his babies

i mean youre his no.1 baby too but he loves his hoodies okay

and you dont mind

hats can be of great use and you don’t need to be suspected to be dating the campus bf

yea they labeled him as campus bf

just bc hes so-

bf material

like u touch his hair, bf material, his hood, bf material, face, bf material

yeah but they never get to the third one bc you only get to do that

did i mention he invites you to watch his swim meets? cuz yes

DID I MENTION HE SWIMSSS?//S/S/D/S;D;DLFF

he’s like part of the varsity before but quit bc he said he enjoys swimming but he doesnt want it to be his passion, its just something he enjoys and he wants that in his heart only.

NO but during hIS VERY FIRST SWIm MEET that WAS like the first ever time you saw him w/o a shirt since hes shy all the time and you just realize how buff he is and you kind just went: 😀😄😀 for a sec but lbr you tried to make him feel better abt how he looks since hes shy or sum and you end up making him rlly flustered but you did your best HDHOSHD

and omg when he saw you in the crowd with a board that said “milky skin bang chan!” (yes a love so beautiful plug in bc i love them all sm) HE LITERALLY COMBUSTED LIKE IT GAVE HIM MORE MOTIVATION, STRENGTH AND HE JUST BOMBED THAT SWIM MEET, MANNNNNN and when he saw that he placed gold medal omg he was so happy and he looked at you in the bleachers

and you were jumping up and down saying his name, hes never been so happy <//3

omg then when he gets interviewed how he felt when he won

he was like so gidddy and all bc he saw you behind the camera guy witth your board and all and he couldnt contain his giggles

like omg ???? </3 ????

*just giddy chan noises*

Lee Minho

omg i love him SM DNKFSDKJFKJSD

HAUFHJHFE

DHFJSHDFJKS

okay ill stop

so the kind of guy to make you walk to his dorm and not like pick u up

as the devoted minho lovers we are, we do it anyway

but dw when you get there he makes sure to dress up his cats for you bc like omg their other parent IS COMINGEGGGDG TO VISIT HRHEJHF

such a soft boy when alone stop

would get shy when he does something for you

like gives a sheepish smile

but then insults you

in a loving way

“you fudging suck <3”

“i love you too <3” <— you btw

thats what happens

and we STAN BC ITS MINHO

anyway, he’s the writer for the university’s paper or something

and he always goes to the bulletin part and writes

“take care of your pets”

andd FUDGING PUTS LIKE HIS SMOL DRAWINGS OF HIM AND SOONIE DOONGI DORI

but no one knows that

sO yeah but yOU DO and you just gush to yourself how hdkjfhksjdjk AMAZING HE IS, and he would just roll his eyes at you for thinking like that bc he says hes nothing special amd you just want to slap him and love him for the rest of your life

and you make sure he knows u love him

sooner the school made him leave his cats in his home (like in his hometown) and not in the dorms and he felt sad bc he misses them sm for like a week or a month and he really just wanted to cling to you because

but he didnt go for that

and you had to initiate it first andd he was so grateful for that. like all his life he just had his cats to go to to, his fam and stuff but he realized how lonley he gets in his dorm and all.

and bro

you just love him for being so open to you bc every since yall met he just turned his shoulder to u and you coudlnt get anything out of him and when you started dating omg he just slowly found his way out of his shell and he realized not every hand that reaches out to him will hurt him or is cold and he touched your hand and it was warm and he called hit home </3

FUDGE MAN

SDOIFOSDKJSDFL *crying*

anywaY

hes a dancE maJORRRR ofc

but then he was like “no”

because he loves dance,, its apart of him and he wants it to just be his other safe haven when youre not there, so he decided to take up to be a doctor

a vet

yes

so he can take care of his cats and other animals (mainly cats)

but you know

and you realized HE HAD THE BIGGEST FUDGING HEART AND YOURE SAD BC HE NEVER GOT THE CHANCE TO EXPRESS IT COMPLETELY AND WHENEVER HE DOES HE NEVER FINISHES BC ITS THAT MUCH AND YOU VOWED TO STAY RIGHT HIS SIDE TO LET HIM FINISH TALKING ABT HIS DREAMS AND SHIZ IN HIS HEART </3

he loves to just take walks on the campus at like around 10-11 pm not 12 because he says its time for him to feed himself some midnight snack

and hes the type to look everywhere for anyone who might see you guys and then hook his hand with yours and squeeze it lightly like hes BEEN WAITING TO HOLD UR HAND ALL DAY

omg im literally having tears stream my face rn

HES SO DOHKJSHDKJHSD

and then he talks abt his lessons and hes so thrilled to learn about cats and stuff

and you just cant help but stay silent and just look at him with the most adoring gaze ever and he just says

“what are you looking at ?”

and like in a defensive mode and u tease him abt it

“our cutie minho!~” or sum shiz and try to pat his head and he kinda freaks out or something and like slightly push you away and dramatically say you could have killed him

and you two just tease each other until you have to walk him to his dorm

yeah you thought youd be walked to ur dorm? yeah no we live in minho’s world

BUT

AS YALL GO ON WITH UR RELATIONSHIP HE SUGGESTED TO WALK U TO UR DORM ONCE AND WAS KINDA SHY ABT IT BC HES NEVER DONE IT BEFORE AND HE HONESTLY JUST WANTS TO BE THE ONE TO SAY BYE TO YOU AS YOU GO IN YOUR DORM BC HE SAW THAT GUYS GOTTA DO THAT TO THEIR S/O OR PARTNER AND HE WANNTS YOU TO FEEL SPECIAL BUT HE’LL NEVER TELL U THAT AND JUST REASONED OUT TO BE

“i heard from the council theres a psycho on the campus”

not original, kinda dumb but you just accepeted it bc you rlly dont wanna walk like half the campus back from his dorm to yours bc bro thats shiz scary in the dark and then its cold and u feel like someones watching

but its just youre anxious lol

and you gave him a little peck on the lips when he said bye and he made a face after you finished but went ahead and gave you another one on your forehead before saying bye fr and going to his dorm

he did a little dance when he was on the camp ground near the front of the entrance of the univ. an threw a penny into the fountain like hes acting as if he was so gracious to gift the fountain a penny after he just won the lottery or something

i wont say what u did bc we know you were like screaming inside

and that started becoming a habit and lets just say the creativity when yall leave each other some kisses to last for the night, </3 like these days he’d give you a peck on the lips the next few days, a little kiss on the nose or sum and a big hug </3

anyway

so minho would also have to tutor you in science (bio obv) you had some science program in your course that year or something andd you struggled with biology

as the doctor he is, he helped you with some

and you didnt ace the exam

he got you a cat shaped ice cream popsicle tho

wanna know why? he said that you would be too hard on yourself and he saved his scolding later and eventually after you finished your ice cream you guys went to study in the library

and guess what instead oof minho studying for his project

he tutored you in math

we hate math here yall

and he kept such a smol smile everytime you got it right and he realized how much you did your best to figure it out and he was so patient with you like he was so nice

but he did sigh like everytime u didnt get it right and it made you feel bad so you said to let it go its fine but he pushed on it bc he doesnt want you to suffer on your own when you study on your own.

UGH MOM I LOVE HIM

he calls his mom to talk to her about you and then talk to her cats about it, and then calls his dad to talk about his school and you also

he doesnt go like “MOM DAD, SOONI DOONGI DORI I LOVE Y/N” yeah no he like subtly talks about you and its so endearing for his parents to see his son to have found someone other than his cats and like it shows how much he admires you and you literally give him a smile everyday and he started thinking smiling for someone is the most romantic thing because he used to think its tiresome but now

he thinks smiling because of you, at you and for you is somethig only the heart can give

literally shut up im crying

“so son- how was your pro-“

“i had to teach Y/N instead of doing the project”

“ did you two have fun though?”

“*rapidly nods head* yeah and they told me all about _ *keeps talking*”

Seo Changbin

look at him and tell me he doesnt seem the type to have the biggest pecks in the game and is emo

dude he radiates flowers and everything nice on top

HAJDHFIJSDHJHDS

i fudging LOVE THIS BOY

hes the type to be everything emo but his personality is so beautiful

and you love him for that

he wants to be a detective

SO YEAH

its kinda like being in the police side and all

but he kinda wants to be like a DP or someone who catches deserters in the army but then the has an undying love to be a detective so yES

and you support him bc bro everytime he solves a case he gets so into it and its so - HJFHKDSJFSDJK

pls dont ask me why i think he’s wanna be a police or a detective or somethig i just get the vibes and all fhvisdijvds

OMG HES THE TYPE TO JUST COME TO YOUR CLASSROOM AND HAS HIS RESTING B FACE AND THEN WHEN HE COMES TO YOU HE JUST STRAIGHT UP USES HIS TINY VOICE OR SUM

like absolutely loves to embarrass you

like dont get me wrong hes a gentle man would defo pull ur chair out for you and all

BUT HE WILL NOT HESITATE TO TEASE U LMAO

but he says sorry and does a tiny exaggerated pout when you rlly get mad and dont accept his small apologies, he would most likely be sulking if you don’t accept it, (like in a joking kinda way yk) but he knows he prolly went far HE WILL NOT HESITATE TO RLLY SPOIL YOU like in a good way, but he also knows you deserve a proper apology and not just things so he will say sorry a bunch of times and try his best to make it upp to you

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

LITERALLY HAS ONE OF THE DARKEST CLOSETS OUT THERE (aside from chan)

but he has this one pick shirt somewhere in the dark sea of black despare of his closet, yes he bought it jusst bc you asked him to match one day while going to the school fair once.

at first he didn’t wAnt IT at first bC it “rUinS” his aesthic and you tried your hardESt that whole week before the fair to let you guys match and when you guys met at the front gate there he is wearing that pink shirt with a bright smile on face and he admits its pretty “cool” and you had “i told you so” rights that day

you had it recorded

HDKFHKSDHFLKDHS PART OF HIS DARK PAST ALL IN AN ALBUM YOU KEEP IN YOUR PHOTOS

let me just say

the time at the fair and you suggested you guys go to the haunted maze for fun

he literally shook in his boots, he looked at you with wide eyes and just shook his head rapidly

and you just teased him abt it so he had to defend himself but failed to do so because he got dragged to the maze anyway

when you guys got out

he was literally clinging to you for dear LIfE, like he cant let go of your hand, would hug you every once in a while and yeah basically soft binnie </3

and the rest of the boys clowning him for being sacred in the maze

when you guys got home omg, he doesnt sleep at his dorm at certain days since his fam wants to play monopoly nights with him

he obliges bc he wants to see them lose (JKJKJK BYE) no but fR he goes bad home bc he’d secetly miss them </3

hes so cute i swear HDKFKDKJDH

he aLWAYS ALWAYS asks you to accompany him whenever he goes somewhere, the libraray, the cafe, home

like no kidding he asks you to sleep over like right after school and just drags you to come with him to his family dinners sometimes and game night

HIS PARENTS AND SIBLING/S LOVE YOU LIKE SM, you seem to have a charm for making changbin do his chores at homee or something so they love you JJHFJDF NAH BUT THEY GENUINLY THINK YOU GUYS FOUND EACH OTHER AND ARE LIKE THE MISSING PIECES TO EACH OTHER AND THATS SO FUDGING CUTE

like one time his sister spam called him to have you over, and he didnt bring you out of spite and he reported back to you saying he swore it was like he saw the heavens for a second

HEHJFKJSDFH YOURE BASICALLY PART OF THE FAMILY AND ITS SO NICE TO SEE HOW THEY LOVE YOU JUST AS MUCH AS THEY LOVE THEIR AMAZING SON

like yall would go on picnics and they would spend more time with you than with binnie, he didnt mind bc he was just happy you were welcomed to his family, he just used it as an advantage to get cuddles later SGFHJGFSJKLFSGJK

he goes out of the country a lot since he was invited to a special university and he feels rlly bad since hes like a year older (just a year calmz down) and hes gonna graduate soon and he has to leave you for a bit

he considered breaking up with you since you guys wouldnt have enough time with each other and he couldnt just leave you without an explanation so he told you abt his worries

and you tHANKED literally EVRYYONE anD everything that he decided too explain it to you and not just leave you

and as the loving couple you guys are that is amazing beautiful life changig inspirational amazing never been done before never the same, you guys worked it out

he does visit many times and this one time he came back with his big ass muscles outta no where and you just 😧 like you were shOCKED

you prolly choked on air the moment u saw him like YOU LOVED HIM BEFORE AND YOU ALWAYS WILL but BRO

literally the only glow up that mattered and all he did was gave you that smile that you see in the gif

you go away, didnt tell me what the hell you doing, come back looking like this and just smile like youre innocent

im just gonna say you were thankful before and after DSHKJSDHJK

BUT YOUVE BEEN SO SUPPORTIVE FOR HIS DREAMS ITS SO HHVSHGJSHFGJH like he was genuinely so thankful to have you and you were thankful to have him too </3

yall just make me sick like its so endearing that i had to blow dry my eyes so the tears stop

you guys text and video call all the time but the timezones are so messed up its hard to meet

but changbin, being the man of your dreams, he made it work, got the night schedule for his classes so when you get out of classes and want to just talk and unwind, BAM hes up and ready to be husband material- ahem i mean your boyfriend

he loves to see you at the airport when he lands back at home and just goes to run up to you and hug you like bear hug

he's gotten ginormous HDFLSDLSD

but sometimes hes had the shizziest year and lowkey just wants you in his arms or to be in your arms, he will hug you when he meets you, lift you up a bit and twirl you

like he gives 0 hecks abt his bags, just drop and run

his first motive is “hug y/n” and his second motive is “kiss y/n” and his third motive is “be with y/n”

thats it

hes a smiple guy and you best give it to him

he loves loves loves when you give him a nose kiss when he sorta lifts you up when you guys first meet at the airport

and that just made me want a changbin

:( omg no he would tell you how much he missed you and how lonely he was waiting for your call when you guys be cuddling and he’d pout slightly and when you give him a little kiss that pout just turns into the sweetest grin and omg i want a changbin

would definetly talk to you about how much he wants to just stay here and be with you for the rest of his life and how hee promises to take you to a vacation that you deserve because lbr group projects and social interaction (except with binnie ofc) sucks

like bro 6-8 hours or more of being with humans suck, you have a big allergy for humans sometimes

but 365 days with changbin every year is literally all you need to cure your allergy <3

doesnt rlly have other hobbies aside from loving you and being the best boy out there </3333

actually i feel like he’d be one of the vocals in Chan’s music projects bc they besties wbk, AND WHEN CHAN GETS FEATURED ON THE SCHOOL’S WEBSITE FOR HIS SONG AND YOU HEAR CHANGBIN

you run to your phone, call him and straight up JUST GUSH OVER HIS VOCALS HEFJSDFHJKSDF AAAAAAA AND HE’D LITERALLY JUST BE WAKING UP BYE AND HE’S JUST SMILE AT HOW MUCH YOU ADORE HIM LIKE HE JUST FEELS SO LOVED AND CARED AND HE VOWED AT THAT MOMENT, HE WILL NEVER LET YOU GET LONLEY EVER AGAIN AND HE REALIZES LIKE AFTER ALL THIS AND ALL HE DOES TO JUST BE IN HIS DREAM HE REALIZES THAT HE’D WANT YOU TO APART OF HIS DREAM TOO </3

HE WANTS TO BE WITH YOU FOREVER BC BRO YOU PROLLY DISRUPTED HIS SLEEP, BROKE HIS EARDRUM BUT DUDE HES NEVER FELT SO HAPPY TO BE WITH SOMEONE and manz just excited to be able to grow old with you </3 literally loves you to the moon, to saturn, to pluto, to the ends of the universe and back

“where do you want to go after i finish my course? ill take you anywhere and everywhere!”

“don’t you have to work though? your job is to protect people not be a tourist guide.”

“yeah but then it’s you!”

Hwang Hyunjin

so like not to be dramatic but i would die for him

sorry

aNYWAYAYYA

so FINE ARTS KINDA BI-

hes actually really into art and he just loves to draw and paint a bunch of portraits, scenaries and yk all that, he loves to dance but he kinda considered it like minho, a part of him and his heart but its defeated with art

hes really passionate about art and he really really wants to pursue it

and you SUPPORT HIM WITH ALL UR HEART AS THE KING/QUEEN/ROYAL YOU ARE

you guys actually first met when you were touring around the fine art’s department with another student, and you guy accidentally bumped in the entrance of the art room or art hall

and you guys have been kinda awkward since then but likeeee you just couldnt get him outta your brain for the next few weeks (months)

and one day you decided to paint something for fun or draw yk you were just stressed and all, you saw him painting a beautiful flower and he looked up at you midway into painting it/coloring it, and he was just awestruck and he just admired you for a bit there (you did too so lolol) and he gave you a soft smile before inviting you to help him maybe with his work

turns out the flower painting was for his girlfriend (</3) and you kinda faltered bc you wished it was you in the place of his s/o and not some girl but then its not surprising he had a gf. sad sad for y/n BUT then he explained how much he wanted to dedicate this to someone, but he never straight up mentioned his girlfriend, he was just unsure of his relationship then since her activities been real sus

and you felt so bad because bro he admired his feelings (not some typo it means his feelings of liking someone or something) and the genuine feeling of being on air when youre in love and he just couldnt imagine it so he paints it to describe his feelings

bro shut up so eventually the girlfriend was cheating on him bcause her reason was like “he only cared about his paintings” and that HURTED HIM bc bro youre out being an indecent human and hes here trying to devote paintings and his feelings to you but you just go say he didnt think you werent worth enough and that rlly pained him

you guys eventually started dating after a few months (nearly a year) you stuck by him because lbr youre glad he left his ex but you were sad that he had to go through such a thing when he just wants to share his love and passion with someone else </3

and when i say the happiness he got every SINGLE TIME he sees you, think about you, mentions about you JUST YOU HES SO HAPPY TO BE HERE WITH YOU AND ALL THAT. HE JUST LOVES YOU AND HE REALIZES HE DOES DESERVE BETTER

and he thinks you are that “better” ,that he deserves or needs

literally shut up im bawling my eyes out

HE PAINTS FOR YOU!!!!!!

sis so like you realized all the paintings he’s done for his ex was all part of his past and for his ex forever, and he wants to let you know his feelings arent just recycled from his old relationship, he makes it the best and the most effort to give you new paintings and literally the cutest meanig behind it stop

hes so in love with the idea of love and hes so inlove with LOVE and you admire that someone that went thru hELL before and has been silently just drawing lines to say how much he feels just for no one to see, was so - JUST AMAZING like he amazes you EVERY TIME. like he would say before “i want to dedicate this to someone i really love…. like my gf” BUT NOW HE WOULD TELL YOU WHEN YOU VISIT HIM IN THE ART ROOM “i want to dedicate this to you.” AND WE ALL KNOW IN HIS HEART HE SAID ‘… you, the person i love the most.”

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA END MY SUFFERING

he would actually have stains on his face, arms and all that all the time and it makes you giggle every time you meet up with him like outside of the univ. and he just defends himself to say that its called the hard work of an artistic artist or something and you just love his dorky side </3

no bc he’s literally the campus crush, when i said campus bf for chan i meant it, but WHEN I SAID CAMPUS CRUSH FOR HYUNJIN, THEY MEAN LIKE CAMPUS HUSBAND

LITERALLY EVERYONE IS HEAD OVER HEELS FOR HIM

like as they should tho

and you cant help but find yourself wanting to just be in the shadows and get hyunjin when its dark out, after classes bc 1, youre irrelevant (thats what you think) and 2 you just feel like someone is bound to make you feel as worthless and make you want to think twice about really dating him bc he could deserve “better”

SIS YOU ARE THE BETTER FOR HIM

but he would notice this and he couldnt do anything abt the attention he gets sometimes but he would always come back to you like all the time, and like hold your hand oor something like he just wants to show you that even if he might get someone better in the future, you’re the best he can find now and he wants to make sure you know you arent irrelevant and you deserve to be loved too, and that you two are meant to be (lbr he’ll think youre the best he can find ever so yeah)

like it dont matter what zodiac you guys are and what folktale that says you guys are cursed, he loves you and you love him, and you both swore deep down that you would wanna keep that fire going for as long as you live

he would love to just cudddle with you after a long day at the art room and he would say hes stiff or sum and you’d overreact and try to tell him about all these types of stretches or offer to give him a massage or something omggg and he would just laugh at you but then come clean about the solution of just being with you cures alot of his pain, emotionally and physically

and you just felt so warm inside after that, (you still insist on giving him one since idk as the loving s/o you are, you dont want him in pain)

he’s dramatic but hes always like that with you, like thats just you two’s inside joke and its so warming how he wouldn’t dare show that side of him to anyone else because you deserve to see all the folded sides he keeps.

just shows how special you are (shedding tear drops)

he strives hard to make all these painting or drawings and shiz for your birthday/ anniversary/ etc. and you just have to accept the fact that encouraging him and making sure he knows hes talented is a full time job and you voluntarily took it.

but he spends so much time just loving being in love with someone like hes just a hopless romantic, loves the idea of love, being in love and shiz and he’s just glad to call you ‘his love’ yk it just replaces everything with the blank place holder of just “inlove with “”love”” “ yk that word suddenlyy just became you.

dates are not his thing like date planning, he’s rusty at it, last time you two went to the same art room you guys met in and he just gave you a tour and then paint with you

but you loved those moments anyway, you get to see your boyfriend at work and you get to see his thoughts just paint out into a beautiful picture, and where he doesnt have to have trouble expressing why he feels like this or why he feels like that, he can just be plain and open, like an open book for you to freely read and its like his way of saying all the things he hesitates to say.

when he told you about the time his seniors before him told him he should have just been a model or ssomething instead of an artist, he’d do better with that pretty face of his, you swore to hunt them down for discouraging him like that, but you couldn’t help but just soften at him

like he’s been through so much with all that and he had to strive his way into a new field he’s entirely new at and he just wants to express a different type of feeling in his art rather than just showing up at a studio for someone to paint him or just strut around with new clothes, sure that paid more, but art was where his heart found it’s home.

and you loved that part of him

(you loved every part but yk)

the feeling of finally knowing what the other person hass been going through, just right when they open up to you and you get the honor of being the person they choose to tell was probably the happiest moment of your life,

it just feels like a different type of intimate you know?

literally an honor.

and one time while you guys were on a date watching corpse bride together

and the line where victor said “pardon my enthusiasm” and victoria responded with “I like your enthusiasm”

yeah that was the two of you, like hyunjin would shy away from telling you what he really loved about art and how he expresses his art to others, you would always ALWAYS try to tell him how its beautiful and all that, he wont believe you of course but the thought tha you always try your best to tell him he did a good job and that you’d always openly want to share the interests and thoughts he had while making it, you wanted to show him you were patient enough to wait for him to show you the things he loved to paint or the thoughts that came to him while making the art piece.

just over all loving annd waiting for him to come out to you.

idk he may seem outgoing and all that and expressive outside but i feel like hes just a shy quiet boy inside that half of the time doesnt know how he’s feeling when he’s alone with his canvas, his canvas was his only best bud to share his inner thoughts and secrets yk

and yEAHHHHHH it seems so repetitive but rlly he JUST LOVES YOU

Like in a healthy way ofc

You guys also take Time on the weekends to clean his paint brushes and shiz and let me say the water fight you guys have- shfkjhskjhfhjdskj omg a mess

LMAOOOOOOOO but no it’s just all fun and throwing wet paint brushes at each other and just laughing then dreading to clean the mess

He doesn’t cook for u

Lol you thought

You guys cook together!!!!!!! He does the rearranged of the dinner plate and you cook

Teamwork at its finest

Sometimes he would just be your assistant and its so cute how him (being the tallest out of you two) just cluelessly handing you a bunch of things you ask and then curiously looking at what you’re doing

Crying

Or sometimes he’d cling to you by back hugging you while you make a sandwich or something and </3 you wouldn’t have to worry abt the cold when making your sandwiches. </3 ugh

Got him a cake once and he just knew you drew the art (?) on the cake with frosting, it doesn’t look like it considering your minor being fine arts, but you showed your best with the frosting

It had “to artist: Hwang Hyunjin,,,,,,, happy birthday!” And a little drawing of you two and kkami </33333

UGHHHHHH and he just loves the fact you consider him an artist when no one ever took him seriously

Even his professors, (no we know he’s got beautiful art and no one can deny it but its for my au I’m sorry </3)

But yeah and he just fell for you even more by that

He did the same for you and decided “I’ve watched them make sandwiches all the time ill make art it of it”

So yes

He made art out of it

Literally

He got the bread and carved it out and shiz then did it with the rest of the ingredients

Fanciest looking sandwich you’ve seen in your life and there was the calligraphy of happy birthday my love in ketchup and you just didn’t want to eat it

WHO WOULD WANT TO EAT SUCH ART

A MONSTER

Yeah but he decided to guilt trip u into eating it and it worked

</3 curse the puppy eyes of kkami and his

But yeah just a goofy dorky loving couple that is both each other’s biggest fan </3

230 notes · View notes

brandishespistols · 3 months ago

Text

I'm treating this like a public notepad rn so uh. Long post warning

Rough bullet points of bits I remember off the dome

• nick and chapel were around the same age. the old pastor at their church was getting ready to retire so he was looking for a successor out of the two. Nick is more gentle and kindness-focused, big on helping out in the community; chapel is more traditional and focused on saving people from hell by any means possible and is hella ambitious

• btw the church that they're at is like. Established to be really involved in the local community; for ages it's been sort of a universal safe place where kids can get dropped off for daycare whenever, houseless folks can get food and medical assistance, kinda just a "if you're having any sorta issue, try the church first" in their small town

• Nick had a rocky home life and he remembered someone saying that if anything went wrong at home and he wasn't promised food or shelter, he could be safe at the church. So one day he went and Ms. Melanie gladly took him in and eventually Nick just resolved that he just wouldn't go home again. He was just sorta adopted into the church family and grew up there instead (he met livio soon after), until he basically just lived at the church and had a rotating cast of family. Ended up getting hella into the Bible bc of it

• so like, when he gets older he wants to pay it forward and become a priest there. So he can be some other kid's safe home

• Chapel grew up going to that same church with his parents, who were more traditional and sorta-friends with the current pastor as well as the chief of police (wink). He and Wolfwood were tentative friends

• back to the first bit I wrote: the old pastor was getting ready to retire and pick a successor. Nick was absolutely lined up to get the promotion, and Chapel wasn't having it. Under the guise of celebrating, Chapel invites Nick to his office to drink to his future promotion and friendly competition. Nick sits down on The Couch (yes I'm doing this) and dies holding a bottle of his favorite wine, which Chapel poisoned. The police (which his best bro recently got promoted to chief of police...) help cover it up and stage it as accidental.

• Chapel takes over the church. He boards up the old children's center (all children are sent to his "new and improved Bible school" instead), removes all he can of Wolfwood, and starts turning things around as sneakily as he can. The congregation sticks with him because he's popular with the elders and the town is small enough that every family there has been going to that same church for multiple generations

• Chapel, after Nick's death, convinces and manipulates LR (who lived at the church like Wolfwood did) to believe that they're some sort of demon or possessed by one and that he needs to repent and be exorcised, and that livio is somehow responsible for Nick dying. Livio internalizes this and blames himself. Chapel sends livio off to conversion camp basically

• years and years pass (like 20 years or so? Idk)

• LR runs away/leaves the camp and strikes off on their own, gets his usual tattoo as an expression of freedom. Comes to terms with them being a system, goes to therapy

• Wolfwood has been haunting this damn church this whole time. Every night, he pantomimes how he died and relives the pain. Every morning, he wakes up on that damn Couch in the head pastor's office, unable to remember what happened. Every day he begs what sick God really exists out there to let him pass on (something something ghosts shouldn't exist if you believe in heaven/hell because yadda yadda; basically he's losing his faith)

• recently, Chapel has fallen I'll and has been admitted to a nursing home. He had trained no successor, and the church needs a stand-in; someone who is practically guaranteed to become the head of the church soon

• enter: Vash Saverem, wandering priest and uh. He's a Nephilim !! (Sometimes seen as giants, sometimes seen as fallen angels, more modernly seen as half-angels or otherwise half-human children of angels, thanks to a certain fandom) (he's a little bit of all of the above). He was drawn to the church bc he could feel someone praying for help, but wasn't sure who or what for. So he went and checked it out, saw they needed a pastor, and went, "well, that sounds like something I could help with! I can find them a new pastor :]" and overall planning from the beginning not to stay very long

• Vash is just getting settled into his new office when Wolfwood materializes on his Couch right in front of him. Vash thinks that he just didn't see Nick come in and immediately starts chatting with him and Nick is just like. "WAIT YOU CAN FUCKING SEE ME????" cue shenanigans

• Vash resolves to help Nick however he can! Unfortunately for this mystery-solving duo, Nick doesn't remember what happened to him, and every year he fades more and loses more memories. Nick also doesn't remember when he gets locked into pantomiming his death so when he does it again, Vash isn't there to witness it. I'd probably save this (Vash witnessing Nick, in a trance, acting out his own death) for a pivotal point idk

• Vash starts poking around, trying to read up on the history of the church. He runs into Millie at the town library, who regularly attends the church and offers to help him out. She introduced Vash to Meryl, who happens to be Vash's new neighbor, and they hit it off. Meryl explains that she works at the newspaper, so she has access to materials that might be a little harder for the new guy in town to get in on, but she's willing to share in exchange for some lunch

• side note. Millie has been going to the church since she was a kid. Her mom used to leave her there when she was too busy with work, remembering how the church used to be when she was a kid (but not knowing that it changed); Millie would sit on the steps and wait for her mom to pick her up, but her mom worked long shifts at the hospital and so sometimes Millie would have to sit alone for hours, waiting, hoping her mom didn't forget or get hurt. Nick, as a ghost, would keep her company, and she was actually able to see him. Eventually, she'd sit in on sermons on her own, and Nick would sit with her there, too. He was her "guardian angel" growing up. Nick left her a little carving he made, once, (it was a little cow), and she kept it and turned it into a keychain. Every time Millie goes to church, she always leaves a little present for Nick behind her pew

• another side note. Meryl met Millie through one of her first articles, where she had to interview members of the church about an event they were doing soon. Millie ended up inviting Meryl to attend with her, not as a journalist but as a friend, and Meryl was immediately down bad. They had a lil date. Meryl isn't really religious or even spiritual, but Millie is such a joy to be around and really understanding and so Meryl enjoys spending time with her. The congregation welcomes Meryl and lets her use the back office to work on writing during the sermon.

• Vash finds out about Nick, and sees that his death was ruled as a heart attack fueled by alcohol poisoning. Which is,,, weird. And doesn't sit right with him. Especially because Nick insists that he's not much of a heavy drinker, and isn't much of a wine guy anyways. And he was a healthy guy other than the smoking! Or so he insists. But Vash is definitely like "hey this is fishy"

Thinking about the vashwood au my husband and I cooked up last night as a sort of bedtime story and either I'm running it by a former Catholic friend to get everything checked or the theoretical fic will include the tag "religious bastardization" since I am most definitely (unintentionally) fusing my knowledge of the Bible (liberal Christian lens???) with what I only partially know about Catholicism (through traumatic stories from the former Catholics in my life)

Oh yeah the au is like. Ghost Wolfwood x priest Vash. And it's a murder mystery. And it's like, heart wrenchingly emotionally devastating. There's freaky shit (😨) and freaky shit (😳). It begins with Wolfwood dying on The Couch and it ends with Wolfwood dying again 👍👍👍👍 I'm normal about it

I will. *Attempt*. To write down the rest of the stuff we were talking about bc I legit want to at least doodle this au

#writing more of this in a second #vashwood #trigun au #trigun maximum #trigun stampede #trigun #vash the stampede #nicholas d. wolfwood #trigun vash #ghost wolfwood #priest vash #religious bastardization #milliemeryl #millie thompson #meryl stryfe #livio the double fang #razlo the tri punisher of death

22 notes · View notes

oskarwing · 3 years ago

Text

I really wanna talk about the parent child relationships in Midnight Mass

I’m not sure if I’m good at writing this sorta Meta but here goes nothing. Very many spoilers follow.

Let’s start with the adults:

First we have Erin who suffered so much at the hands of her mother and later because of her mother’s abuse. We don’t get much detailed info on Peggy Greene but from what we can gather she was a lot like Beverly Keane, who seemed to idolize her (though that probably got easier for her after Peggy was gone), in her self-righteous over-pious manner. She just happened to be Beverly with an alcohol problem and a daughter who she could take all her anger at life for not working out her way for God loving her just the same as everybody else out. The dove scene is really such a good scene. But Erin was stronger than her mother, stronger than the abuse that was about to repeat itself and when she found out that she would have a child of her own she left and tried her best to give her kid a better life than the one she had. And she found the strength I think with the help of the same God her mother most likely used as legitimation for her abuse (don’t get me wrong I believe it was Erin’s own strength but she also clearly found something in religion that helped her gather it) and it helped her to carve out a path for herself and her unborn child.

Sarah’s relationship to her parents is such an interesting one because we get to see the end of it. The man who she believed to be her father has been dead for a long while and her mother is suffering through the late stages of dementia. And Sarah showed up for it. As a doctor she most likely knew what would be happening as soon as Mildred started to show the first symptombs but she wasn’t going to leave her mother. That kind of care for an elderly parent shows something that is proven in Mildred’s character time and time again: She is a very devoted parent and the love between mother and daughter flows both ways in every scene they are in together, after the birth of her daughter her world turned around Sarah and she loved her with all she had. There are a few scenes that show that Mildred’s understanding of the duty she felt towards her family came from the old values of her time. She wouldn’t have taken off with John and their child not for a lack of love but because in those times, in catholism still at least where I’m from, you can’t just marry a priest. You can’t just have a child with a priest eventhough you’re married and then fuck off with him. As a woman, as a wife and mother you have to stand with your husband, stand with your child and you have to stop running after fantasies I’m sure Mildred had. I’m saying this all from her perspective btw, I don’t necessarily think running away with John, in the way he wished to, would have been good for Sarah but honesty might have been and her old fashioned values were also what kept her from being truly honest with her daughter. To John on the other hand Sarah is a fantasy, a dream he couldn’t reach. His daughter, his baby, so close and yet so far away getting to watch her grow into an adult but never being able to really be her father as in her Dad instead of her priest. And it’s painful to him, he clearly loved Mildred, loved Sarah but he was also kinda selfish in his love that in the end took Sarah away. At first he isolated his child by starring at her giving her the creeps and the feeling that she had done something wrong that he knew she was gay and dissaproved and then he took it upon himself to ‘cure’ Mildred in the same way he was. Sarah wanted to take care of her mother wanted to be there for her in those final months and John decided it was up to him to give Mildred a youth potion to make it so she’d never die. And with that he took away from Sarah what is without doubt a hard but for many people a very important last part of the relationship between child and parent. John was a complicated man and would maybe have been a great Dad he certainly showed a lot of fatherly love for his altar boys but he couldn’t have the family in the way he fantasized about and in the end it was that fantasy that made him act the way he did.

Riley Flynn causes his parents a lot of pain. Him killing that girl in the beginning, his alcoholism, him simply not liking the place, the home they build for themselves through hard work causes the Annie and Ed so much pain and financial loss and you can see how tired they are, how much guilt they feel for failing their son. Ed calls out his own guilt and says that he doesn’t belive it could be Annie’s fault because ‘your mother’s a saint’ but what I truly love about Annie and Ed Flynn is that they both aren’t saints. As a mother Annie is very much overprotective and suffocating, wanting to keep her children on crocket island and hating the notion that they might leave her, even though she is kind and sweet and loving. And while Ed seems rather checked out as a father but he is the more honest parent, never talking down to Riley and telling him as it is, telling him about the pain he caused him while also admitting to the guilt he feels. The Flynns are flawed people even in their religious practice (I think the way Annie speaks about Ali showing up at church when Hassan seemed to be nothing but nice to her spoke very loudly to the fact that Annie is rather misguided sometimes) but they are good people at the core of it and their parenting might have been part of Riley’s way into alcoholism but it wasn’t only them. There were things they couldn’t change and things they had no influence over like his heart being broken by Erin running away, the sort of people he went out on parties with and so many other things... Yes, they may have shaped their son in a way that made him vulnerable to addiction and the party scene of the stock and tech market and brought him to the point where he killed a child but it doesn’t happen through parenting alone and they also shaped him in the good ways. Him not losing himself when Pruitt changes him, him being brave enough to warn Erin, him standing up for what he believes in those things were also shaped by Ed and Annie. They are one of the best example of flawed but good hearted Christians I have seen in recent media and their portrayal was one of the most heartbreaking ones.

Now the kids:

Let’s start with Leeza. Little Leeza Scarborough who before it comes to her wonder gets treated with pity and overprotectiveness from her parents and the island community at large. Leeza was injured by Joe Collie transforming him into the island’s villain and her into the ever present victim. What happened to her is without a doubt horrible and I understand why Wade and Dolly started to become these overprotective parents, why they were so easily sucked in to John’s and Bev’s scheme. Their little girl was almost taken from them eventhough Wade is the mayor, one of the most powerful people on the island he had no influence over what happened to Leeza even was the one who took her out that day and what followed the accident was as we can gather from their conversation with Sarah a lot of pain and financial burden though they say they would have done it all over for Leeza. In fact a lot of places in crockett island are wheelchair accesible and I am sure that Wade as mayor made it so (I can’t really imagine that a small place like the island was very inclusive though I may be wrong). After Leeza is healed they don’t want to question in don’t want to think about what might have been the cause for it. In fact they stop questioning anything after that point, after Leeza walks again they are completely vulnerable to Bev’s manipulation and them letting that happen, them just going along with everything, Wade protecting John after he kills Joe long after Leeza forgave him and with her forgiveness send Joe on a better path is what in the end makes them lose her. Because Leeza isn’t that little victim who needs pity and help, she is a strong minded, strong willed young woman with a lot of wit who similar to Erin finds strength in her faith but in a way that isn’t devotion without question and when the Easter vigil is held she doesn’t follow her parents eventhough she loves them deeply. She forgives them I think, because that’s what Leeza’s character is about in it’s core but her parents were two of the instigators behind what happened on the island, without Wade’s protection John and Bev couldn’t have come as far as they did and they put their trust in them because they loved their daughter so much they didn’t stop to question if maybe what made Leeza walk again was also a bad thing.

Ali and Hassan don’t have it easy and I as a white person really can’t speak much on the racism and religious discrimination they face. I can say this I think: The first line spoken about Ali before we even really get to look at him is “You didn’t invite Aladin” and already sets us up for what both of them know: They are the outsiders. Not only because they just moved to the island but also because in their faith they are different from their peers and religion can often be a community building event for people before it is anything else. Ali starts balming his father a little for that, for not trying to fit in more with the community, for moving after his mother’s death and then not trying to be closer to the people around them and for the pain all the pain the two of them went through before Crockett island. It isn’t oly peer pressure though of course that brings Ali to St Patrick’s. Sure, Ali wanted to be part of the community but also desperately wanted to believe that there was a devine power who could if he just did it (it meaning faith) the right way he might find a way to avoid the pain of his parents. Hassan knew that and he warned him that that wasn’t how it worked. Hassan was a protective Dad and maybe he overdid it from time to time but his worries were never without reason, his need to keep his son safe from a world that hated him for a crime that happened when he wasn’t even born yet never unfounded and him wanting to make sure his kid kept the memory of his mother alive never anything but the wish of a griefing man and loving father. In the end when they pray together there is peace in them. They face their ends with the dignity Ali’s mother would have wished for and they face it as father and son. While Beverly the true religious terrorist of the story burns away without it.

Warren is the youngest Flynn and it is never directly stated yet omnipresent that his coming of age happens in the shadow of his older brother’s mistake. Annie warns him away from drinking when he goes out he in fact doesn’t drink. He never drinks because of what his brother did. Warren would have been 12 when Riley killed that girl and so he would have seen and felt what his brother’s actions did to his parents fully without being yet old enough to maybe see the nuance. Annie and Ed probably try to right the wrong they believe to have done in parenting Riley with Warren and that’s a lot for a kid. I do think it’s pretty usual that parents of multiple children especially when there’s a larger age gap try to do better with the younger children, but that isn’t fair is it? Warren is his own person not a second chance to do it over. And yet seemingly he does what is asked of him. He’s alter boy, he’s charming and helpful and sweet, he doesn’t drink (even when he does smoke pot) and he helps his father where he can with his work. But in the end he feels guilty because he thinks he wasn’t enough and says at that last dinner he would have been different if he had known he wouldn’t see his family again. But Leeza is right they know and they love him and Warren deserved to not be perfect all the time.

Littlefoot saved Erin and Erin payed her back with all the love she had. She was never born but she gave her mother the strength and willpower to leave. In her speech to Joe Leeza said he reached through time and took things from her she didn’t even know she had yet.When Erin left her husband she reached through time and saved Littlefoot from a childhood like hers and when John gave Erin the angel’s vampire’s blood he reached through time and took away her child, a child who would have been loved and cared for. A child with an amazing mother and probably a great step-dad. Littlefoot’s story is tragic because she never got one.

#midnight mass #midnight mass spoilers #parents in midnight mass #I dunno man I just really love how they showed all these examples of parents

72 notes · View notes

dialovers-translations · 3 years ago

Text

Diabolik Lovers LUNATIC PARADE ;; Ayato Route ー Chapter 1

Yui: ( I have to retrieve my heart no matter what…! )

ー The scene starts in the carriage

Ayato: Oh, take a look, Chichinashi! The castle has come into view!

Yui: Eh...?

*Rustle*

Ayato: Heeh...Guess it’s to be expected with the ongoing Parade, but things seem pretty fired up in the surroundin’ city as well.

Hehe. I think we’re in for a good time...!

Yui: ...Hold up!

( A good time...? I thought we were going to look for my heart...? )

Ayato: Hm? Why are you frownin’...?

Ah. I bet you think that I’ve completely forgotten ‘bout your heart, aren’t you?

Yui: Uu...

Ayato: Hmph. How could I forget? I remember it very well!

But you know, we have to gather some information on this Walter guy first.

So I see no harm in enjoyin’ the Parade a lil’ while we’re at it?

Yui: Eeh...!?

( Can we really afford to take the slow approach...? )

...

Ayato: ...Are you that worried ‘bout your heart?

Yui: ...Well...

Ayato: Oi, listen up.

I’ll ensure you get your heart back.

So don’t worry. Trust me!

Yui: ...Yeah...

( ...Right. I’m the one who chose Ayato-kun after all...So I can’t lose faith... )

*Rustle*

Ayato: ...Puttin’ that aside, guess I’m take a lil’ break before we arrive at our destination.

That bein’ said, I’m gonna borrow your lap for a bit.

*Rustle*

Yui: ...! A-Ayato-kun!?

( He laid his head down in my lap...! )

*TIMESKIP*

Yui: ( Count Walter...I wonder why exactly he has stolen my heart...? )

( Um...I think it was called a ‘Kleinod’? )

( Apparently I’m still alive because one of those has been put inside of me to replace my heart but...Still... )

...

( ...Let’s not think about that now. Worrying myself sick won’t get us any further anyway. )

( It’s just like Ayato-kun said. I shouldn’t make myself unnecessarily anxious... )

Ayato: ...Zzー ...Zzー...

Yui: ( Fufu. Ayato-kun seems to be enjoying his nap... )

ー The carriage suddenly comes to a halt

*Rustle*

Yui: Kyaah...!

Ayato: Uwah!?

*THUD*

Ayato: ...Ow!!

Yui: ( ...! Ayato-kun was sent flying from the rebound...! )

A-Are you okay...!?

Ayato: T-The fuck!? I was sleepin’ so comfortably too...!

*Rustle*

Ayato: Oi, Familiar! Where did you learn to drive like that!? Cut the crap!

Familiar: M-My sincere apologies...! Someone suddenly jumped onto the road from behind the shadow of those trees...

Ayato: A person...? ...What? Who the fuck’s that bastard dressed in all black...?

Yui: ( ...A black-clad figure riding on a horse is blocking the path... )

( On top of that, he seems to be staring our way... )

Ayato: I don’t know what’s goin’ on but I don’t like this one bit...Fuck! Imma go give him a piece of my mind!

ー Ayato gets out of the carriage

Yui: A-Ayato-kun...!

Ayato: Oi, don’t come down. Sit still and wait for me inside the carriage. ...Capiche?

ー He runs off

Yui: ( There he goes... )

( I wonder if he’ll be okay by himself...? )

ー The scene shifts to the outer area around Bernstein castle

Black-clad figure: ...

Ayato: Oi! Mr. Man in Black! You sure have some nerve to get in my way!

Who the fuck are you!? Get off your horse and name yourself!

*Thud*

Black-clad figure: ...I’m the gatekeeper.

Ayato: Gate...? Hmph! Strange name you’ve got there, mate!

Gatekeeper: I have no name. Gatekeeper...In other words, the one guarding the gate of the Demon World.

It is my duty to ensure that no unwanted intruders enter the Demon World...

I simply cannot allow that tainted woman who is neither demon nor human to set foot inside.

Ayato: Aah!? Oi, say that one more time?

She’s a tainted woman!? Imma send you straight flyin’ if you speak that sorta crap again!

ー The scene shifts back to the carriage

Yui: ( ...Oh no! I have to stop him! )

ー Yui rushes out of the carriage

Yui: Ayato-kun! Calm down!

Ayato: ...! Chichinashi!? Idiot! Why did you come out!?

Yui: Because...!

( At this rate, it’d turn into a fight... )

Gatekeeper: Hmph. I knew it...Oi, woman. You are under arrest.

*Thud*

Yui: Kyah...!

Ayato: ...! Not in my book! Let her go!!

*Rustle*

Gatekeeper: ...!

Ayato: You really think I’m gonna hand her over to some creep like you!?

Let’s go, Chichinashi! Run!!

Yui: Y-Yeah...!

ー The two of them start running as the scene shifts to Glimmer Main Street

Ayato: Haah...Haah...Seems like we got away somehow.

Even if he chases after us, we should be fine amidst this large of a crowd.

Yui: Right...

( Still...I wonder if we should have ran away...? )

( What did that person mean with ‘a tainted woman who is neither demon nor human...? )

( He must have been talking about me, right...? )

( Being here might be more dangerous in my current state than I thought... )

Ayato: ...Oi, what’s wrong? Why do you look so glum?

Yui: Eh...?

Ayato: ...Listen, Chichinashi. You are mine.

I definitely won’t let someone else have you.

So you’ve got nothin’ to worry ‘bout.

While I’m lookin’ for your heart, you can look ‘round the Parade and take it easy for a bit.

Yui: ( ...Ayato-kun... )

( Right. Ayato-kun’s with me after all...I’m sure everything will be fine. )

( I’m sure he’ll save me no matter what happens... )

Okay. I will.

Ayato: Mmh! Let’s go then.

Male Vampire A: Oi, did you see it? The poster on the plaza...

Female Vampire A: Yes. one of Karlheinz’ sons is on the wanted list, right?

Male Vampire A: Yeah, it’s Sakamaki Ayato...

Yui: ...!?

( Ayato-kun’s a wanted criminal...!? )

Ayato: Ah? What did you say ‘bout Yours Truly?

Male Vampire A: ...’Yours Truly’...? Could you be...Sakamaki...Ayato...?

Ayato: ...? I mean, yeah?

Yui: ( ...! Ayato-kun just revealed himself! I have to cover up for him!! )

Let’s go over there!

*Rustle*

Ayato: Aah? The fuck you doin’ all of a sudden...?

Yui: ( Either way, we have to get away from here...! )

ー Yui drags him away as the scene shifts to Aizen Alleyway

Ayato: ...Hmm, I see. I’m an outlaw, huh?

Well, I’m sure that ‘Gate’ guy or whatever his name was is behind it, right?

Hmph! He’s challengin’ me, huh? He’s got some balls then.

Yui: Anyway, that’s our current situation, so we should probably avoid crowded areas for now...

Ayato: ...Well, you might be right but...

...Say, Chichinashi?

Yui: Eh?

ー He pins her against the wall

*Thud*

Yui: ...Kyah!

Ayato: Aren’t you just makin’ up excuses ‘cause you want some private time with me...?

Yui: Eh...!?

Ayato: You should just be honest ‘bout it then. ...I don’t mind.

I was just ‘bout in the mood for that as well. Nn...

Yui: Nn...!

Ayato: Nn...Haah...

Yui: Haah...! Gosh, Ayato-kun! Now’s not the time for this...!

Ayato: Oh shut up. You’re the one who enticed me.

Come on, look this way. I’ll give you one more. Nn...

*Smooch*

Yui: ...

( ...It’s no use. I can’t push him away... )

ー Footsteps can be heard in the background

Male Vampire A: I could have sworn they went that way...

Ayato: ...!?

Yui: ( ...!! Somebody’s coming!! )

Ayato: ...Che. Seems like somethin’ got in the way. We’ll continue later. Come here!!

*Rustle*

Yui: Kyah...Ayato-kun, wait...!

ー They run off again to an underground passage

Ayato: Fuck...That Gate guy totally ruined our plans to enjoy the Parade...

Oi, Chichinashi. We’re takin’ a break. Now!

Yui: A-A break...? Right here?

Ayato: ...Let’s see if there’s any good spots ‘round...Well, guess we can just open one of these doors at random...There!

*Thud*

Yui: ( ...! He’s opening doors without permission...! )

Ayato: Oh. Better than I expected. We can take a seat and rest here.

Yui: A-Ayato-kun...Couldn’t this be the basement of someone’s home...?

( He just invited himself in...We’ll get yelled at if they find us! )

ー The scene shifts to an underground room

Ayato: ...Heeh. Well, it’s a lil’ dusty in here, but I guess it’s more comfortable than the place we were at before...

Well thenー... Guess I’ll kick back and relax for a bit.

*Thud*

Yui: ( Ayato-kun totally made himself at home... )

Selection

→ Call him out (☾)

Yui: ( I should probably tell him... )

...Hey, Ayato-ku...

Ayato: Come on, you should sit down here with me. I’m sure you’re tired from runnin’ ‘round, right?

Yui: ( Is he looking out for me...? It’s kind of difficult to call him out now... )

→ Keep quiet

Ayato: Come on, you should join me here as well.

Yui: S-Sure...

ー Yui takes a seat next to him

Yui: ( It can’t be helped...If the resident of this house were to come down here, we can just explain the situation to them... )

( ...However, if this person has seen the wanted poster...What will we do...? )

( Perhaps we should explain the circumstances to the Gatekeeper instead, )

( and have the wanted poster taken down...? But... )

ー A flashback ensues

Ayato: ...Listen, Chichinashi. You are mine.

I definitely won’t let someone else have you.

So you’ve got nothin’ to worry ‘bout.

ー The flashback ends

Yui: ( I truly felt happy to hear those words from Ayato-kun... )

( He got upset when the Gatekeeper called me a ‘tainted woman’ as well... )

( Despite some of his statements, I can tell he properly looks out for me... )

( I’ll stick to his plan for a while after all... )

( ...Wait, huh...? )

ー Ayato opens one of the cupboards

Ayato: Oi, Chichinashi! Check this out! There’s so much interestin’ stuff to find in this room!

Yui: ...Ayato-kun!?

( He went ahead and opened one of the cupboards...! )

A-Ayato-kun...! You’ll get scolded for looking through other people’s belongings...!

Ayato: Haah? Who cares? It’s not like I’m tryin’ to steal anythin’.

Anyway, look...You should join me here as weーー

*THUD*

Ayato: ...!? Uwah...!!

Yui: ( The cupboard...!! )

*CRASH*

Yui: ( O-Oh no...! It fell over...! )

Ayato: S-Shit...

ー Somebody rushes downstairs

???: ...Is someone there!?

Yui: ( ...! We’re busted! )

Ayato: ...Yeah. We let ourselves in for a bit, ‘kay?

House owner: ...! Who are you two!? What are you doing in someone else’s basement!?

Ayato: What do you mean...? Can’t you tell we’re takin’ a lil’ break here? Got a problem with that!?

House owner: Of course I do!!

Yui: A-Ayato-kun...!

We’re on the wanted list, so we have to somehow talk our way out before things escalate...!

Ayato: Che, shut up. I don’t need you tellin’ me that! ...There!

*THUD THUD*

House owner: Uwah!

Yui: ( He knocked over a different cupboard this time...! )

Ayato: Oi, Chichinashi! Now’s our chance! We’re gettin’ out of here!!

*Rustle*

Yui: Kyah...! W-Wait, Ayato-kun...!

ー The scene shifts back to Aizen Alleyway

Ayato: Haah...That was close...

Yui: ...Gosh, you definitely went too far just now!

Ayato: Aah!? Fuck off!

If we just stood ‘round there twiddlin’ our thumbs, we would have both gotten arrested!

Yui: ...Even so...!

Ayato: Anyway, we can’t return to the underground now...

...Guess we have no other choice. Okay, this way. Let’s go.

*Rustle*

Yui: ( ...But that’ll take us back to the plaza from earlier, no...? )

Ayato-kun, wait...! Where are you...?

Ayato: I’ve got an idea. ...Lend me your ear for a sec.

*Rustle rustle*

Ayato: There should be a dress shop right across the plaza. We’re gonna get ourselves some costumes there.

Yui: Costumes...?

Ayato: There’s plenty of people walkin’ ‘round dressed up as part of the Parade.

If we mix in with them, we’ll be able to proceed without gettin’ our cover blown, right?

Yui: ...I see! Way to go, Ayato-kun...!

Ayato: Heh! How’s that? Let me tell you, try and keep your head high.

Bein’ all sneaky and trying to keep low will only make you stand out more in these kinds of situations.

Yui: ...Yeah, gotcha!

*TIMESKIP*

ー The scene shifts to the dress shop

Ayato: ...Phew. We made it to the store somehow.

Yui: ( Thank god... )

( I’m sure it’s because my heart is missing that nobody took notice of me, unlike the previous times I’ve been here...Right? )

( ...However, we can’t rest assured just yet. We have to make sure the employees don’t recognize us... )

Dress shop owner: Are you looking for something?

Ayato: Yeah! We want costumes for the Parade. For me...and for her as well.

Dress shop owner: Understood! In that case, I would highly recommend these outfits which came in just earlier today!

Ayato: Oh! Show us then!

Yui: ( ...Ayato-kun’s acting completely normal... )

( I guess nobody would suspect we’re wanted outlaws like this... )

Ayato: Hm...There’s quite the collection. Oi, Chichinashi. Which one do you want?

Yui: ...Hm, let’s see...

( If we want to conceal our faces, a mask might be good... )

*Rustle rustle*

Ayato: ...Hey, look at this one.

Yui: Eh?

*Rustle*

Ayato: You over there! Stop fooling around and make your choice already! Your sense of danger is severely lacking!

Yui: ...!

Ayato: ...What do you think of these nose glasses? All I gotta do is part my hair differently (1) to complete the look!

Yui: ...Ayato-kun...Just now were you trying to...?

( Imitate...Reiji-san...? )

Ayato: Hehe. Whatcha think? I sounded just like him, no?

Yui: ...Pfft....

Ayato: Ah! Why are you laughin’ your ass off!?

Yui: I-I mean...!

Ayato: ...You finally smiled.

Yui: Eh...?

Ayato: You’ve had a frown on your face ever since we came here.

Don’t blame me if it gives you wrinkles. (2)

Yui: ( Ayato-kun...He was trying to make me laugh on purpose... )

*TIMESKIP*

Ayato: ...’Kay, guess this will have to do for now...

Yui: ( We got masks and costumes for the both of us...I guess we’ll be okay now. )

( We kind of got caught up in the flow and spent quite some time inside the store. )

ー They leave the dress shop

Yui: ( Ah...! We accidentally walked out without our disguises. We have to get changed somewhere... )

Female Vampire A: ...Ah, hey...Aren’t they...?

Male Vampire A: ...I’m positive! It’s those two from earlier...! Seize them!

Yui: ( T-Those people from earlier...! T-This is bad...!! )

Ayato: Oi, we’re makin’ a run for it, Chichinashi! Come here!!

Yui: Y-Yeah!

ー They run towards the wagon area

Male Vampire A: They went that way!

Yui: ( They’ll catch us at this rate! )

Ayato: Fuck! No way I’m lettin’ myself get caught so easily!

Female Vampire A: They went that way!

Ayato: Oi, Chichinashi! We’re takin’ a shortcut! This way!

Yui: Eh!?

Crepe vendor: Crepes! Who’s in the mood for a fresh crepe?

Ayato: Get out of the way!

*THUD*

*CRASH*

Crepe vendor: Uwaah! My stall!

Yui: ( H-How terrible...! )

Ayato-kun, you can’t do such a thing...!

Ayato: Whatever, just follow me! Do you want to get caught!?

*Rustle*

Yui: Kyaah...!

( Even if he says that, this is messed up!! )

ー The two of them flee to Aizen Alleyway

Ayato: Haah...Haah...Che, a dead end...

It can’t be helped...I’ll just jump up in the air the...Uwah!?

*Flip*

Ayato: The fuck!? ...Wait, this is...

Yui: ...! Could this be...

( It’s our...wanted notice, right? But...these portraits... )

( ...They look nothing like us...actually... )

Ayato: ...Hahaha....Ahahaha!

What’s this? Who made these sloppy drawings?

Yui: ...But in this case, we probably wouldn’t have gotten recognized even without dressing up...

Ayato: Well, you do have a point...

ー Somebody walks up to them

???: ...I have finally found you two. No more of this useless game of tag.

Ayato: ...! You’re...!

Yui: ( The Gatekeeper... )

Ayato: ...Chichinashi! Grab hold of me! We’re takin’ off!

Yui: ...Ayato-kun, let’s not...

Ayato: Ah? The fuck you sayin’!?

Yui: Even if we do that, it’ll just bring us back to square one...

Let’s go with this person and explain the situation to them?

Ayato: Haah!? What are you sayin’!? Why should we let ourselves get arrested when we’ve done nothin’ wrong!?

Yui: ...Exactly. We have to start by explaining why we came here and clear our names.

Ayato: ...Why should we...!?

Gatekeeper: Hmph. For being a tainted woman, you seem rather reasonable.

Ayato: Tsk...Try sayin’ that one more time, you punk! I’ll send you flyin’!

*Rustle*

Yui: Ayato-kun! It’s fine! Just calm down, okay?

*Rustle rustle*

Ayato: How can I stay calm!? That bastard talked shit ‘bout you bein’ tainted again...!

Yui: Please! Listen to me right now...!!

Ayato: ...Fuck!

Yui: ( Ayato-kun...I’m sorry... )

Gatekeeper: So? Have you made your decision? Well, you only ever had one choice from the very beginning.

Yui: ...We will come with you.

Gatekeeper: ...Very well. Come with me then. I have a carriage waiting for us on the main street.

Yui: ...Yes.

*Rustle rustle*

Yui: ...Let’s go, Ayato-kun.

Ayato: ...

ー They get in the carriage

Monologue

And so,

we were taken suspect,

by the Gatekeeper.

The place we were taken to by the carriage,

was Bernstein castle.

The home of Count Walter,

and the exact same location we were headed ourselves...

It turned out that the Gatekeeper,

had been looking for us,

upon Count Walter’s direct order.

ー The scene shifts to the throne room in Bernstein castle

Ayato: Che. Tell us that right from the beginning next time!

That Gate-something is actually one of Walter’s underlings!

???: ...Well, well, my sincere apologies.

Ayato: ...! Walter!

Yui: ( ...! This man is Count Walter...! )

Count Walter: So you are Ayato, son of the world-famous Karlheinz?

Ayato: Hmph! You bet! Altho I don’t give a damn ‘bout the Old Man.

Count Walter: Please, don’t say that. And you must be...

...I see...You are, huh? ...Fufu...

Ayato: Aah? The fuck’s your problem...? Stop ogling her!

Count Walter: Fufu, don’t get so upset. Well then, let us use this opportunity to have a nice, leisurely chat. Take a seat.

Ayato: Oi...I didn’t come here for no chit-chat.

Give her heart back. Right now!

Yui: ...Ayato-kun...!

Ayato: I mean, I’m not wrong, am I!? All of this happened ‘cause this freak stole your heart...!

Count Walter: ...I see. Ayato, it appears to me that you have quite the temper.

I have actually been testing you two.

Yui: Us...?

Count Walter: Yes. Ever since I sent that card your way, I have been keeping a close eye on you from here the whole time.

To see if you, and your partner Ayato...

...are suitable candidates to possess a precious treasure of which only one exists in this world.

Ayato: A precious...treasure...?

Yui: Could that be...?

( Is he talking about my stolen heart...? )

Count Walter: Hence why I chose not to reveal my ties with the Gatekeeper in an attempt to observe how you would deal with him.

However, unfortunately, it seems like you two are simply not suited for this treasure.

Yui: ...No way!

Ayato: What do you mean!?

Count Walter: I am sure you will agree with me if you take a second to think back to everything you have done these past couple of hours?

Ayato: Fuck off! Why do we have to get told all this shit by a frickin’ thief, huh!?

Stop spoutin’ this nonsense and hand back her heart!

*THUD*

Count Walter: ...That just cost you another five points.

Ayato: Haah? The fuck are these points...!?

Count Walter: While we may know each other’s names, this is our first time meeting in person. On top of that, I am your senior by many years...

Yet you choose to behave in such an outrageous way, which can only result in a bad score, no?

I cannot see someone like that as a fit candidate for this treasure...

Ayato: Aah!? You’re in no position to tell me that!

Yui: ...! Ayato-kun!!

Count Walter: Haah...There goes another five points. This is just sad.

As I thought, I don’t think I will be returning this treasure any time soon. Give up and go home. Gatekeeper! Show our guests the way o..

Yui: P-Please wait! J-Just one more...! Can’t you give us one more chance?

Count Walter: ...Hooh.

Yui: I’m begging you! Without that heart, I will...

Please...! Just one more chance...!

Count Walter: Hm...I see...

It seems that unlike with Ayato’s case, you seem worthy of retaking the trial.

Ayato: Aah!? Excuse me!?

Count Walter: ...Well then, Yui-san. Out of respect for you, I shall give you one more chance.

Yui: ...Really!?

Count Walter: Yes. Well then...You two will go and set straight all crimes you have committed here in the Demon World.

Yui: Set straight...our crimes...?

Count Walter: ...Exactly. In the meantime, I shall watch your every move from here.

If you can satisfy me with your approach, I do not mind returning your heart to you then.

Yui: ...Really!? Thank you so much!

Count Walter: Fufu. Being capable of giving a genuine response to someone’s act of goodwill is an admirable feat. I shall award you one point for that.

Ayato: Aah!? Look at you favorin’ Chichinashi this whole time! I’m not diggin’ this!

Count Walter: Oi, Ayato. If you do not watch your words, you will lose points again? Why not take a lesson or two from her?

Ayato: ...!

Count Walter: Well then, get going you two!

Yui: ...B-But...What should we do exactly?

Count Walter: Fufu. You will have to figure that one out yourself.

All I can say is that you should think long and hard about everything you have done so far and fix things appropriately...That’s it.

Well then, I have high hopes for you.

Yui: ...Yes. Please excuse us now. ...Ayato-kun, let’s go.

Ayato: Ah, oi! Chichinashi! Wait!!

*TIMESKIP*

Monologue

We returned to the city,

in a carriage which had been prepared for us.

The Count had been so kind,

to take down the wanted posters,

which meant we no longer had to hide ourselves,

while going from one place to another.

However, the real challenge starts now.

Let us take a deep breath and think first.

About the true meaning,

behind the task which has been given to us by the Count...

I have to somehow retrieve,

my stolen heart after allーー

While trying my best to explain the situation,

to Ayato-kun who seemed as grumpy as ever,

we settled in a waterside hotel.

ー The scene shifts to the hotel room

Yui: Ayato-kun?

( ...He’s not here...? )

( Could he be out on the balcony? ...He must still be upset, huh...? )

ー She steps out on the balcony

Ayato: ...

Yui: ...Ayato-kun. You must be thirsty, no? I’ve got some juice. I’ll leave it here, okay?

*Thud*

Yui: ...Um...I’m sorry...I was quite selfish back then...

Ayato: Che, my thoughts exactly! What was your problem? You just bent to that Count’s will like it was nothing...

He’s the one who stole your heart in the first place, remember!?

So why are we the ones who have to get tested!? It makes zero sense!

Yui: ...Yeah...

( I can’t blame him for getting upset...Still... )

Say, Ayato-kun? Listen?

Ayato: Aah?

Yui: I don’t think you’re wrong...

When we came here and the Gatekeeper talked badly about me...

You got mad at him...Remember? That made me really happy, you see.

Ayato: ...!

Yui: I was convinced you’d protect me no matter what. I told myself to have some faith in you.

Even when we were being chased around by a bunch of strangers, I knew things would be okay because you were there with me.

I want to stay with you from here on out too.

...That’s why I just have to get my heart back.

So we can be together in the future as well...

Ayato: Chichinashi...

Yui: I truly do feel bad for involving you in this as well.

If you don’t want to, I’ll handle it by myself.

I promise I’ll return with my heart, so you can...

ー He suddenly embraces her

*Rustle*

Ayato: You really think I’d do that!? Don’t give me that crap!

...You are mine. How many times do I have to repeat myself?

Ayato-sama will definitely retrieve your heart!

I mean, doesn’t it only make sense? If you are mine, then so is your heart.

I’m not gonna let that bastard do with it as he pleases...!

*Rustle*

Yui: Kyah...Nn...!

Ayato: Nn...

Oi, Chichinashi. Don’t ever say you’ll go by yourself again. ...Understood?

Yui: ( Ayato-kun... )

...Yeah. Gotcha. I won’t.

Ayato: Mmh...Well then...Let’s call it a day.

Starting tomorrow, we’ve gotta get started on that fucked up task given to us by the Count after all.

Yui: Yeah, good idea. ...Ah, Ayato-kun!

Ayato: Pwaah...Hm, what?

Yui: Listen...Okay? ...Thank you for everything...

Ayato: ...Hmph. What are you sayin’ out of nowhere...?

...Oi. I was gonna sleep but I changed my mind. Come here.

*Rustle*

Yui: ( Eh!? W-Wait...Ayato-kun!? Kyaah! )

*Thud*

Ayato: ...Oi, Chichinashi. If you want to thank me that badly, you better tend to me tonight.

Yui: Eh? W-What do you mean...?

Ayato: ...Let me suck your blood. I was just feelin’ kinda thirsty.

Don’t even try sellin’ me that juice of yours. It has to be your blood. Hehe.

*Rustle rustle*

Ayato: Nn...Haah...Nn...

Haah...It really does taste a lil’ different from usual but oh well...

...It’s still your blood in the end.

In other words, every single drop of this blood belongs to me as well. Nn...

Yui: ...Ayato...kun...

Ayato: ...Oi, gimme more. Nn...Nn...

Yui: ( Even if his words are harsh at times, he always embraces me so gently... )

( I’m sure everything will be okay with Ayato-kun by my side... )

ーー TO BE CONTINUED ーー

Translation notes

(1) 七三 or ‘seven-three’ refers to a type of hair style in which the hair is parted unevenly with 30% being on one side and the other 70% on the other, hence the name ‘seven-three’. Reiji has this hairstyle, so Ayato always refers to him as 七三メガネ or ‘shichi-san megane’

(2) Literally he says ‘Don’t blame me if your face never goes back to normal’

← RETURN TO PROLOGUE

→ PROCEED WITH MAIN STORY [CHAPTER 2]

→ SUB-SCENARIO #1 [W/ SHUU]

→ SUB-SCENARIO #2 [W/ KANATO]

#diabolik lovers #dialovers #ayato sakamaki #lunatic parade #diabolik lovers translation #lpayatochapter1

58 notes · View notes