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badasgirl · 1 year ago

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i’ll always cheer for you

bada lee x fem!reader

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what happens when the basketball team captain and the cheer team co-captain are in love but can’t tell anyone…

genre: fluff, minor angst (my bad), slightly suggestive if you squint (?)

warnings: reader and bada are both lesbians, slightly suggestive with a veryyy tiny makeout scene but nothing too crazy, no caps on purpose (booo ik terrible grammar).

author’s note: this was not proofread nor do i know much about basketball so please be easy on me. anyways, yayyy my first req done, thank you to @badasgirlfriend for being my first request!! this was supposed to be a quick lil imagine but i got a bit carried away 🧎‍♀️…BUT i hope this was good :3 btw reqs are still open!

word count: ~1.8k….

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you and bada lee were captains of your respective sports at your university: cheerleading and basketball, granted you were a co-captain along with another girl named lusher, you were a captain nonetheless. becoming captains by your sophomore year meant you both had insane leadership skills and were talented in your fields. naturally, you both were drawn to each other and became the bestest of friends during your first year of leadership.

however it’s now your senior year and y’all are a little more than friends. last year one night after a game, both the basketball and the cheerleading team went out for expensive bbq to celebrate the win the basketball team brought home. the whole night bada kept clinging to you. she was cooking your meat, making little lettuce wraps for you, and feeding you everything. it got to the point everyone had just assumed you were already dating.

“bro when did you start dating? i cant believe i wasn’t updated.” lusher said in a jokingly hurt voice as she dramatically placed her hand over her heart to feign sadness.

“yeah i thought we were close y/n!” tatter, another cheerleader, said while pretending to cry into her fellow teammate’s, minah’s, shoulder.

you giggled softly while shaking your head at their actions. “guys please! we’re not dating, bada’s just my best friend, right honey?” you said as you turned to look at bada.

bada felt her heart twinge slightly at hearing the words “best friend”, but she quickly nodded in agreement before smiling at you and saying “right honey.”

“me personally y/n, i’d be asking bada what are we!” jj, a fellow basketball team member, joked as she stuffed her face with food.

“best friends…sure” aiki, another basketball player, replied sarcastically before chucking and saying “i don’t call my best friend honey, but yeah! for sure besties!”

everyone at the table laughs at aiki’s and jj’s comments, including you and bada. however, bada knew that night she had to confess to you. she could no longer fight her feelings for you, she wanted to kiss you and hold you close in her arms until you both fell asleep. so, she told you exactly that. you both being lesbians who are in denial of their feelings course led to reciprocated feelings neither knew about. all that mattered now was you were hers and she was yours.

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now back to current time, you’re both seniors and it’s been a little over a year since you and bada began dating. you both became closer than ever. you did everything together, no one could separate y’all from each other. however, no one knew the truth. your relationship was kept a secret because you both decided for the sake of your sports and reputations as captains that no one could know. you both took leading a team so seriously, that neither of you wanted to have anyone think you guys were slacking off due to being in a relationship. so of course this lead to its own issues.

people would ask both of you out on dates constantly (especially you) and although you both would pay zero attention to these people, it bothered the other. bada especially hated it when men would ask you out no matter how many times you told them you were a lesbian. she wanted to scream to the world that she was your girlfriend and everyone else can fuck off, but she couldn’t.

one day it bothered her so much that some man named jongin asked you out to dinner that she couldn’t even bear to look at you because while yes she was jealous other people perceiving her girlfriend, she was even more upset she couldn’t tell these people off for you. she didn’t answer your texts, she didn’t walk you to class like usual, hell she didn’t even wave back when you waved at her in the halls. she had ignored you all day up until she saw you crying and hugging tatter in the hallway near the entrance of the building. bada immediately ran up to both of you and asked why you were crying. tatter shook her head in confusion before explaining that you just began crying once she asked about your day. bada sighed deeply and told tatter to let her handle it. tatter was skeptical at first but eventually agreed as she slowly pulled you off of her. she patted your head before leaving and let you know that she’ll text you later. once it was just you and bada, you hung your head lowly while trying to hide your sniffles. bada placed her hands on your shoulders while leaning down slightly to match your height.

“princess, what’s the matter?” bada asked softly with her voice full of concern. you looked up at her with tears streaming down your face, her heart broke on the spot. bada hated seeing you upset, she only ever wanted you to be happy.

you eventually replied through your sniffles. “why do you hate me now? is it something i did? why are you acting like i don’t exist…” you trailed off beginning to cry harder.

immediately bada’s heart broke again, she hated you being upset, but she hated you being upset because of her even more. she herself began to tear up as she pulled you into her arms and held you tightly. she soothingly rubbed your back, letting you cry into her.

“i’m so so sorry princess, i never meant to upset you. it’s just the thing with jongin bothered me so much and the fact i couldn’t do anything…” bada explained through her own tears now. you looked up at her in understanding before wrapping your arms even tighter around her, clinging to her as if she would disappear.

“i understand baby, but next time please just talk to me. i hate feeling this way, i hate us crying over misunderstandings.” you explained as you began to calm down. you pulled away from bada but then placed her hands in yours.

she looked you in your eyes, nodding in agreement before she replied with “i promise i will. let’s never cry over a MAN again.” she emphasized ‘man’ before laughing attempting to lighten the mood. you began to laugh with her while smiling up at her. god, you were so in love with this girl. nothing will ever stop your love for her.

“we should get going, practice starts soon and you know friday is the game that determines if the team goes to finals or not.” you said seriously as you began to get in your leader mindset. bada agreed with you and you both went off to practice for the very important upcoming game.

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it was finally d-day. one of the most important games of the season began as the buzzer rang throughout the court. the basketball team was working so hard to keep the score high, needing to bag the win. the cheer team was working just as hard on the side lines making sure the basketball team could feel enough love and support to have the strength and energy to keep pushing through this game. you, lusher, tatter, minah, and the rest of the cheerleaders were screaming so loud that your throats were feeling raw. seeing bada in her element made you fall for her all over again. bada was flying across the court so naturally and with ease, scoring point after point for her team. she was constantly blocking shots from one of her opponents haechi wang. however, the opposing team was not weak. for every shot bada blocked, one was scored almost immediately after.

it was now the final 30 seconds of the game, the score was 57:57. aiki had the ball as the buzzer went off and she immediately began to dribble it. bada made the sign that she was open to aiki, she knew it had to be her who made this final shot for her team to bring them their victory. aiki saw bada and immediately made the pass. once shs got the ball, she was off. she didn’t want to let her team down, so she knew she had to put in all the effort she could. it was down to 15 seconds on the timer and bada was exactly where she needed to be to make her shot. however, she started to get nervous and overthink. but before her thoughts could take over, bada managed to hear her girlfriend from across the court yell, she heard you yell “LET’S GO BADA LEE YOU GOT THIS!”. nothing else mattered once she heard your voice. she blocked out everything except for your voice and the hoop. bada took her shot and right as the buzzer sounded, the ball went in the hoop. she had gotten a buzzer beater and scored the win for her team. it didn’t even click for her that they had won until she saw you running across the court towards her. bada smiled as you ran into her arms. she lifted you up and you wrapped your legs around her waist.

you were filled with so much happiness and pride you didn’t care anymore. right as you looked into each other’s eyes, you kissed her passionately. bada questioned absolutely nothing as she kissed you right back with just as much passion, borderline making out with you on the court. cheers from the crowd, both basketball teams, and your cheer team could be heard as all attention was now on both of you.

once you pulled away from bada’s lips, you immediately shouted out to everyone “MY GIRLFRIEND IS GOING TO NATIONALS!” bada couldn’t help but smile and giggle at your actions. the world now knew that you were dating. you could hear everyone laugh along in happiness as many people clapped for you.

“what did i sayyyy!” lusher exclaimed to her team as they all smiled and agreed.

“yo hyojin you owe me $10, i told you so” aiki said to her teammate as she held out her palm waiting for her payment.

both you and bada laughed at everyone’s actions. you both held each other close in a current state of bliss. in the end, who gives a fuck if others think you’re slacking off. you both know it’s not true and that’s all that matters.

“hey bada” you whispered to your girlfriend, still holding her close.

“yes my princess?” bada responded, her voice dripping with sweetness.

you smiled brightly as you looked into her eyes and said “just know that no matter what, i’ll always cheer for you.”

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thank you so much for reading ˚₊‧꒰ა❤︎໒꒱ ‧₊ - lila

#bada lee #bada lee fluff #bada lee angst #bada x reader #bada lee x reader #bada fluff #bada angst #bada imagine #bada lee imagine #gxg #gxg fluff #gxg angst #swf 2 #swf2 #bada #gxg imagine #gxg scenarios

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thevoidstaredback · 2 months ago

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The day was finally there. It was finally happening. Phase two of the best prank the Wayne Family and friends had ever pulled off was finally coming to its peak! If all went well, then they'd only have one more thing to do.

As long as the heroes approached them about it. They'd all placed bets on whether they'd actually get away with trying to pull one over on the Justice League or not. It was pretty evenly split.

It's the morning of and there are exactly ten hours before Wayne Manor is consumed with fast paced staff and last minute everythings. Eleven hours before the guests begin to arrive.

06:00

It was an early day for everyone, but Gala Days are always like that. Patrol had been cut short for Damian, Tim, Steph, and Cass, so they, along with Duke, were the only ones who were working on longer than four hours of sleep.

It wasn't all that bad, though. They're vigilantes. If they were thrown off kilter for getting less than a few hours of sleep, then they'd've been exposed before Jason stole the wheels off the Batmobile.

Either way, Alfred had everyone up for a nice, but simple, breakfast before they got on with their days.

He'd made eggs, sausage, bacon, beans, toast, fried tomatoes, and mushrooms, though Damian and Steph were given coconut bacon, eggplant, and applesauce instead of bacon, sausage, and egg. Everyone got their preferred drink of coffee, orange juice, or milk.

Out of everyone, aside from Alfred, Duke was the most awake, but that was because he had to go on patrol soon. Damian would join him about midday, just after lunch.

Duke was relieved to be out all day. He didn't want anything to do with all the last minute preparations that would be going on, no thank you, sir. It would all be worth it in the end, but he'd rather not be stressed to the heavens while trying to prank some of the best heroes in the world.

Why did Bruce think this was a good idea?

Why did they all go along with it?

Oh, that's right, it's because they're all crazy.

It's gonna be so much fun, though, so he's not complaining too much. Everyone can be stressed out here in the Manor, but he's going to be stressed about other things on patrol.

07:00

After breakfast was cleaned up and Duke had left for patrol, the rest of the Wayne Family set about reviewing everything they'd done to prepare, including going over exactly what their hired security had been doing since they were asked to work the event.

This fell to Barbra. Which is total bullshit because she has a dayjob and she doesn't live in Wayne Manor. And, no matter how much Bruce insists, she's not his child, so she shouldn't have to be stressed over this like they are!

She hadn't spent the night at the Manor, but Dick was keeping her updated on what was going on at the Manor. She kinda wishes she'd gotten some of Alfred's food before going to work, but a bowl of cereal and some toast was better than nothing.

She hated early morning shifts, but she'd had to take this one because of the gala that night.

The things she does for her boys. (Yes, she's including the girls in that statement. It's a term of endearment.)

It was a slow morning, like every morning at the library, so Barbra was doing the painstaking task of going over every single move thirty people had made in the last two weeks.

Was it necessary? No. Was she doing it anyway? Yes, but only because Bruce is a paranoid bastard. And, in Gotham, that's normally justified. Especially since they were hosting high-profile guests who aren't allowed to spend any amount of time in Gotham at all.

This was fun as hell, but this particular precaution was so redundant.

Babs wants a pay raise.

She doesn't get paid for this.

would you look at that, the first two people are still clean. Twenty-eight more to go.

"Dad's probably having much more fun at the station." She snorts softly. "Yeah, right."

08:00

Kate, Selina, and Luke were on Arkham duty. No one ever goes out of their way like this, but knowingly having so many powered individuals in Gotham at the same time was a risk that they were putting extra precautions in place to account for.

Arkham Asylum is a revolving door on the best days and they were due for another breakout soon. Everyone could feel it.

Batman doesn't like metahumans operating in Gotham because of the sheer amount of chemical warfare and child endangerment. A normal civilian that's been hit with Fear Gas or Joker Toxin is a pain to subdue and cure. A Bat is even worse, and most of them don't have superpowers. A meta getting doused with either of those would be disastrous.

The Justice League may not know the reasoning, but they respect it. This means, however, that none of them know how to deal with anything that happens in Gotham.

They're not patrolling the city. They'll leave that up to Signal and Robin, whenever he joins him. Batwoman, Bat Wing, and Catwoman are stationed around Arkham Island itself. Batwoman is watching Arkham East, Bat Wing at Arkham West, and Catwoman at Arkham North. Under strict instructions to not engage in the event of a breakout, they're there purely to watch. If there is a breakout, then they're to down the bridge and call the rest of the family to help deal with it. From there, it's just normal procedure.

Why Bruce doesn't have surveillance on the island already is anyone guess.

"We've only just gotten here," Batwoman said into her comm, "But I'm already over this."

"Don't jinx it, man," Bat Wing sighed, "I'd rather have a boring day today."

Catwoman tsked at them. "It'd be exciting, though, having to deal with a breakout and a gala at the same time."

"I guess," Batwoman agreed, "But with so many heroes coming to the city? That sounds like a horrible time."

"Where's your sense of whimsy, Katey-cat?" there was a teasing smile in her voice.

"Dead with my aunt and uncle."

Bat Wing couldn't stop his laugh. "Ha! Don't let B hear you talk like that."

"I can talk however I want to. B cope by putting on a bat suit and fighting crime, I cope by making jokes."

"Batwoman?"

"Yeah, Cat?"

"You're wearing a bat suit and fighting crime."

A moment of silence passed between the three.

"Shut up."

10:00

Tim's job was monitor duty. He was charged with watching every entrance to the city, making sure he knew the exact moment the heroes and their families arrived.

Monitor duty's always boring. How does Barbra do it? She deserves a pay raise.

She doesn't get paid. None of them do...

Hm.

Tim knows why it's important to know exactly when their superpowered guests arrive. He also knows why it's important to know exactly where they all are while they're in the city. But, c'mon. Why does he have to be here all day? If they timed it right, then no one should be entering the city until-

Oliver. And Dinah and Roy and Lian.

What the hell are they doing here so early? Even on a private jet, it's a seven hour flight! They shouldn't be there until two at the earliest!

Unless they boarded at two in the morning.

Who in their right mind would put a toddler on a plane for a redeye flight?

Rephrasing: Why would someone as rich as Oliver think it would be a good idea to take a red eye to the Crime Capital of the country?

Did they- were they here so early to sight see?

He shakes his head as he picks up his phone and calls Jason. "Head's up, man, The Queens just landed at the airport."

"Got it." Jason hung up. Asshole.

Tim sent the same message to the group chat they'd made for this purpose. Oliver, Dinah, Roy, and Lian were now in Gotham City. If Jason does his job right, then they'll have a tracker placed on them soon. If not, then Tim'll have to follow them the hard way.

He switched to a different monitor, keeping one on the Queen Family. If he's right, then the only groups not arriving by plane will be the Supers and the Wonders, so he'll have to watch the train stations and bridges, too.

12:00

Alfred called everyone to lunch the moment the clock turned over the hour. Nothing had gone wrong so far and it was putting everyone on edge.

A pessimistic view, but that's how they were all raised. Well, most of them were raised that way.

Despite waiting anxiously for the other shoe to drop, everyone was having a grand time. Phase Two of their prank wasn't nearly as fun as Phase One, but they were still excited to go through with it. After all, if they pull this off, they'll have more leverage over the heroes, and that's just too good too pass up.

Bruce called attention by clearing his throat. "Our original plan was to see if the Justice League would be able to sniff us out tonight without us having to say anything. I'd like to alter that course a little bit."

Now he had everyone's undivided attention.

"As you know, I've asked Oliver to give a speech tonight. Afterwards, as everyone's clearing out, I want to tell him directly."

"But what about Clark and Diana?" Steph asked, "You've known them the longest, so shouldn't they be the first to know?"

Bruce nodded. "Yes, but I don't have an excuse to pull either of them aside without it looking suspicious."

"Why tell anyone at all?" Jason said, "If they can't figure it out on their own, why should they get to know at all?"

"I was going to tell them anyway," Bruce admitted, "I just thought that you all would like to have some fun with it before then. After all, it wouldn't be just my name they're learning, but all of yours."

"So, everyone would know?" Dick wondered. It'd be a relief on his end, especially because he'd spent weeks convincing the others to let him tell his best friend.

Bruce nodded. "All of the Justice League would. All of the other teams will probably find out through word-of-mouth, so once the JL knows, then every hero will know."

"That's a huge risk, B-man," Tim stated, "Are you sure it's the right decision?"

Jason scoffed. "We're asking questions now? We knew the risks when we started this whole thing. I say we see it through to the end, but you all tell your teams at the same time."

"You only say that because you'd be completely safe from the risk." Steph jabbed lightly.

He smirked at her. "Exactly."

"So, you'll tell Queen tonight before he leaves. At the next meeting, you tell your team while we tell ours?" Damian surmised.

"Exactly, chum."

"Yeah, but why Oliver? Why now?" Dick asked again.

Bruce looked sheepish. "Because I trust them." It was hard for him to admit, but this was probably long overdue. "I trust them with my safety, and I trust them with yours." Then, he smirked, "Plus, no one will believe Oliver if he tries to tell anyone."

The table started laughing together, the mood brightened.

Cass tapped the table after a few minutes. "Good idea," she said, signing as she spoke, "They'll hurt, but be glad you told."

Tim sighed. "I guess I gotta set up a meeting with the Titans, huh?" He pulled out the phone he uses exclusively for Red Robin. Then, he paused. "I don't think I want to tell them all. I'll obviously tell my team, but that's already going to be a huge amount of people who know."

"I'm inclined to agree." Damian added, "Though I'm not worried about so many heroes knowing, it is concerning to have that many variables holding our secret."

Steph agreed, "I don't work much with the other heroes, so I'll be pretty safe, but that is a lot of potential betrayals."

"Don't say it like that!" Dick gasped, "He's opening up!"

"No, no," Bruce waved, "She's right. It's a risk I'm willing to take by telling my closest friends, but I won't if you al don't feel comfortable with it."

"Well, then that makes this whole thing a moot point, doesn't it?" Tim said. He had yet to put is RR phone away, but he hadn't even turned it on either.

"I think we should tell them," Dick said, "Just our closest friends."

"Easy for you to say, Richard, West already knows who we all are."

"All the more reason to tell the Justice League! Even if we only tell the people who we invited tonight, then that's fine. It's still a huge show of trust on our end."

"He's right," Cass said, "They trust us, we trust them. Time to show them."

"Am I telling my team, or not?" Tim groaned.

"I will be telling Jon." Damian decided.

Bruce nodded. "I'll tell my team."

"I'll tell mine." Tim agreed.

Dick rubbed the back of is head, "Well, Wally already knows, but I think Raven isn't mad at me anymore."

Right, because this was actually a huge point of contention between Dick and his team.

"Anyone I'd tell already know, so, I'm good."

Bruce sighed. "I'm not even going to ask."

"Good, 'cause I won't answer."'

"Wonderful that you've all come to a decision," Alfred said as he finished clearing the dishes and food, "But I believe Master Duke is waiting on you, Master Damian."

"Right." He pushed himself away from the table, tucking the chair behind him. "I will see you all tonight."

13:00

Unlike everyone else, Jason wasn't in costume or stuck at the manor. Or at work. He was on ground duty.

Before lunch, he'd managed to slip a tracker onto Lian and Roy, not without Roy texting him to ask what the fuck was up. He said that he needed to get one onto Oliver or Dinah so that Batman knew where they were while in the city.

"That's fucked, man." Roy had sent back, though Lian's tracker was moved to Oliver.

"Not my decision," Jason had sent back, "But it's a safety precaution, so stay together."

After the discussion at lunch, the topic of which they should've hashed out at the very beginning of all of this, he'd been set back to follow unsuspecting heroes.

Which is a lot harder than you'd think, but still pretty easy for him.

It helps that Roy knows he's following them for safety reasons.

Though, another message came from Tim stating that both the Speedsters and the Wonders had entered Gotham. Sure, easy. Except the Speedsters had taken a plane while the Wonders had taken a car.

Fun.

While Tim's tracking Diana's car, Jason gets to put trackers on Iris and Bart. Dick, supposedly, has told Wally to look for Jason but not acknowledge him, as well as the fact that the trackers are a safety measure.

Apparently, Wally's on board wo help where he can. Good. That means that Jason can quietly hand off the trackers and Wally can deal with the rest.

At least, that's how it was supposed to go.

Jason was not warned that Wally holds the same energy as Dick.

"Jason!" Wally's smile was huge when he called out to him, running over to greet him, leaving his confused family a few yards behind. "Dick said you'd meet us here! It's been a while; How's it going?"

First off, Jason has never met Wally, though he supposes it's a good cover story. Second, why the hell does Wally know his name and face? He's going to kill Dick.

He popped a smirk. "Nice to see you, too, Wally. Dick's sorry he couldn't be here to meet you guys, but he's held up with some work at the moment."

Wally waved him off while Barry, Iris, and Bart joined them. "Meh, I'll harass him about it later. In the meantime, can you show us where our hotel is? We would take a taxi, but Dickie warned me about driving in Gotham when he heard we were coming."

Hotel? Makes sense, though it's inconvenient. "Dick's mixing up Bludhaven drivers with Gotham drivers." He shook his head. "Though, be healthily cautious of everything in Gotham while you're here. You're staying long?"

The group fell into step, though Wally was still the only one talking to him. "Only the night, then we gotta go back to Central City tomorrow."

He whistled. "Central? You're a long way from home."

"Yeah, but it's gonna be totally worth it. You know the Wayne Gala going on tonight?"

"There's a Wayne Gala tonight?"

Bart took this moment to chime in. "You mean you don't know about it? It's gonna be so cool! We got a special invite!"

"Is that so? I can't say I knew about any Galas going on tonight, though that shouldn't surprise ya. I don't really have time to worry about the upper class."

"Oh?" Iris asked, "Why's that?"

"I work in Crime Alley," The name made Barry shift slightly. "so my focus is on the lower classes and how to get kids off the street."

"Crime Alley?" Barry confirmed, "Isn't that where Red Hood is set up."

"You've done your research."

"Gotham's got a reputation."

Iris smacked his arm, but Jason just chuckled. "That she does."

Bart lasted no longer than five minutes of quiet walking before asking, "What can you tell us about Batman?"

"Not much," he answered, "He's basically a ghost. The only people that ever seen him are criminals and Commissioner Gordon."

"What about the other heroes?"

"'Heroes'? Gotham ain't got no heroes. She had knights, sure, but no heroes."

"But, what about Batman and Robin and Nightwing?"

"'Vigilante' would be a better word to describe them. Besides, Nightwing doesn't work in Gotham, he's out in Bludhaven."

"Oh."

The group stopped in front of a hotel, one of the cheaper ones near the airport. Jason held his hand out to the group. "It was nice meeting you guys. I guess I'll be seeing ya tonight?"

Barry shook his hand, then Iris, Bart, and Wally.

"I thought you didn't know about the Gala." Wally gasped dramatically, "Were you lying? To a child?"

Jason scoffed and shoved Wally's shoulder. "You're older than me. And, yes, I did. Not many people know about it outside of rumors, but I'll be there with the security team."

"I thought you were too busy to worry about the one percent?"

"I gotta have money to help out the kids in the Alley." A lie, but they don't need to know that. "Anyway, I gotta go. It was nice meeting you guys."

Bart waved enthusiastically at him. "By, mister!"

He called Tim as soon as he had turned the corner, getting Diana's location. He had a tracker for Cassie and one for Donna.

14:00

Patrol during the daytime was boring, but it presented its own challenges. However, none were so inconvenient as to drop him right in front of not only all four Earth-based Green Lanterns, but also the Atlantean Royal Family.

Honestly, them being in the same place at the same time felt like a joke of some sort. If it is, it's not very funny.

There was a robbery happening in the Narrows at a bodega that Signal likes to go to while on long patrols. It was pure chance that they were stopping by mere moments the robbers entered the building.

Scott, Stewart, Gardener, and Jordan all looked ready to step in from one side of store. The Curry family and Hyde also looked ready to jump in from the opposite side of the store. Their reactions were amusing compared to native Gothamites.

The bell on top of the door chimed again as the door closed behind Signal and Robin.

"You gonna put that gun down, or am I gonna have to take it from ya?" Signal asked, a hand on his hip. Robin said nothing, though he did place his own hand on the sword at his side.

The two robbers both hesitated before putting their weapons down.

Signal smiled. "Good." He turned to Robin. "I'll take these two to the station. Will you pick up our food?" Robin nodded. "Great. My usual, old man?" The older gentleman behind the counter smiled and started to make the food.

With their wrists zip-tied behind their backs, the two robbers were escorted outside and into an alleyway down the street. Signal would place a call to the cops and meet Robin across the street.

Robin waited silently for his and Signals food to be done, very aware of the eight visiting heroes watching him.

The old man finished Signal's sandwich, moving on to make Robins. The Green Lanterns and the Atlanteans were still watching his every move.

"There's been no moves from Arkham," the old man said as he handed Robin the food, "Anything to worry about?"

Robin shook his head. "No. As always, there will be a notice sent out if anything happens on the island."

"I don't know why they don't just destroy the bridge and call it a done deal."

"Resources still need to reach Arkham Island."

"Bah! Let 'em die on that island. If Batman ain't gonna take care of 'em, let 'em take care of themselves."

Robin bristled as he took the food. "I shall inform Batman of your opinions on the matter. However, he is working on a way to rehabilitate the inhabitants of Arkham Asylum."

"There ain't no saving most of 'em."

"Then let us work to save the ones that can be saved." He left after that, having no intentions of continuing a pointless conversation.

He could still feel eight pairs of eyes on him as he left, though they couldn't follow him to the rooftops.

Tt.

16:00

Dick, Steph, and Cass were in the Manor, helping Alfred by keeping Bruce out of the kitchen. The waitstaff, chefs, and security that they'd hired for the night were due to arrive very soon and having Bruce out of the way was best for everyone.

Saying that all three were keeping him occupied was a stretch. Cass and Steph were keeping Bruce confined to the Family Wing of the Manor while Dick handled everything else with Alfred.

When the hired help arrived, Alfred had been confined to the Manor to keep an eye on them while they cooked and got set up. That left Dick to pick up the suits from the tailors and pick up the three bloggers that had been hired to cover the press.

The suits were in the Diamond District at their usual tailor, so there was no hassle in picking them up outside of the stares he got when going in and leaving the store. Nothing he wasn't used to, though.

He was meeting the three press at the train station and taking them to Wayne Manor. Alfred was going to do it, but Jason was wandering Gotham and no one else is allowed in the kitchen.

However, there's a small problem with meeting three members of the press at the train station.

"The Kent Family just got off their train." Tim had sent to the group chat, "They're with the bloggers Buce hired."

Damn it. Is this payback for siccing Wally on Jason?

Dick threw on his Press Smile and walked into the train station. He spotted Clark first, Connor second, then the three press, and Lois and Jon.

The page four reporter from the Daily Planet was locked in conversation with Clark and Lois, though the other two were looking around nervously. He walked right up to the group.

"Mister Kent," he greeted, the group's attention falling to him, "Misses Lane. It's good to see you again."

"Mister Grayson," Lois smiled at him, "I don't suppose you're here to take us to Wayne Manor?"

He sighed exaggeratedly. "No, not this time I'm afraid. However," he turned his attention to the three who weren't family, "I am here to take you three to the Manor."

The Tumblr blogger Bruce had picked out held out their hand to shake. "It's nice to meet you, Mister Grayson, sir."

The one from Reddit also shook his hand, a smile taking over her face. The reporter from the Daily Planet looked like he was itching to take a picture or a statement.

"Please, call me Dick," he smiled, "That goes for you, too, Mister Kent, Misses Lane."

"Call me Clark, then," he said. "This is Connor, my little brother, and Jon, my son."

"Nice to meet you two. However, we must get back to the Manor. I'll see you all tonight?"

"Of course." Lois said pleasantly.

17:00

Everything was set just in time for the Manor gates to open and guests to arrive. Commissioner Gordon was over security, though he'd be inside the ballroom itself.

Everyone had returned to the Manor thirty minutes ago, all getting themselves ready before going to greet their guests at the entrance they'd be using.

Tim was still tracking all of the heroes and their families, relaying their locations until they crossed the property lines.

Jason, Kate, Luke, Steph, Selina, and Barbra were arriving separately and in the middle of everyone else. Selina, Jason, and Barbra would come together; so would Kate, Luke, and Steph.

Slowly and steadily, the ballroom filled with the invited guests.

18:00

The waitstaff moved quickly and professionally, making sure every single person had the meal that had been prepared for them. They were all labeled meticulously with the name of the person and table they were going to, a picture accompanying. No cross contamination in the food, and every dietary restriction - that the Waynes will not be explaining their knowledge of - was placed with the correct person.

As soon as every plate had been settled, dinner officially began.

Part 14 Part 16

#Batman's Biggest Hater #part 15 #bruce wayne is batman's biggest hater #batman is dramatic and i will die on this hill #dc #dcu #justice league #dc comics #pranks #they're a family of detectives #using their powers for good #mostly #we're pretending i know what i'm talking about #i'm not vegan and i did surface level search for the meals #forgive me if i'm wrong

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milla-frenchy · 10 months ago

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Snowflakes

0k8 | Joel Miller x fem reader | ao3

Summary: you and Joel are on your way back from patrol. You fall asleep not expecting this night to be worse than your encounters with the infected

Warnings: 18+ mdni. Dead dove. Noncon. Dark Joel. Pwp. Joel pov. Somnophilia, oral (f), masturbation (f/m), piv, degradation. No age specified

a/n: @not-a-unique-snowflake-blog thank you for beta reading 💕🫶

Heed the warnings. If any of this makes you uncomfortable, do not pursue reading. This fic isn't for everyone, and that's ok. I don't condone any of this.

Follow @millafics and turn notifications on for fics updates

Masterlist

***********

Joel couldn't sleep. The patrol had been stressful, too many infected had crossed your path. You two had stayed at one of the usual cabins for the night. He was looking at the moon through the window. Everything was quiet. The snowflakes kept falling and must have covered your footprints by now. You had fallen asleep, exhausted after several days of patrol, way longer than usual. You turned onto your back in your sleep, and he didn’t take his eyes off you.

When he pulled down your panties, your scent drove him crazy. His mouth latched onto her pussy and his tongue ran over your folds. You were so tired that you didn't wake up. He kept licking your pussy, his hand tight on his thick cock as he was fucking his wrist while you were moaning more and more in your sleep. He knew that when you woke up you would struggle. That he would have to hold you under him to fuck you. He didn’t care then when his tongue was buried in your pussy. Soon he would thrust his cock in your cunt. He didn't even know what had taken over him, why he was acting like that all of a sudden, when there had never been anything between you.

His tongue inside you was no longer enough for him, and when he moved back up to your clit, he pushed two fingers in your pussy. His mind and body wanted to take, to possess, to cum. He continued to jerk off harder, thinking about the moment he would push his cock inside you. He got obsessed with the desire.

When you finally woke up, you called his name without really understanding what was going on, if you were dreaming.

“J…Joel?”

When you realized what was happening, you tried to pull his head away but it turned him on even more. He let go of his cock and grabbed your wrists with his free hand, still fucking you with the other one, growling between your thighs.

Was it your incoming orgasm that made you stop struggling? He didn’t know and didn’t care. You came on his fingers and on his tongue, and he thought he might spill his cum onto the sheets. If he had been 35 years younger, that probably would have happened. But not that day, not then. That day he wanted to fuck that cunt. He needed it. When he moved back up to you and settled between your thighs, you hit his torso with your fists but he was too strong to be stopped. He took his thick cock in his hand and nestled it at your entrance. You begged him to stop, tears in your eyes.

“You cum in my mouth and think I won’t fuck you?”

He hadn't even wiped himself after making you cum, and his beard was glistening with your wetness.

“You’re gonna fuckin’ take it.”

When he sank in you, you were afraid he would tear you in two. It'd been a long time since you'd had sex with someone. And Joel didn't want to have sex, he wanted to fuck.

He didn’t stop until he bottomed out, and he stayed there, buried between your folds, balls deep in your pussy. You heard him breathing hard against your neck, until he pulled back and looked at you. When he buried himself again in your core, he didn’t take his eyes off you.

“Told you you’d take it. Fuck, you’re tight.”

He was smirking at you with each thrust. As if he was feeding himself with your fear.

“I bet you never took such a big cock in your cunt.”

Again, he was thrusting in, fucking your warm pussy.

"Touch yourself. Make yourself cum on this cock. Come on, I know you want it."

Mechanically, you did as he asked, and slightly rotated your finger on your clit.

“Fuckin’ whore. If I knew you were such a slut I would have fucked you sooner”, he growled.

You were ashamed when your orgasm came. Your pussy squeezed his cock so hard, that you were afraid he would release his cum inside you. But he gritted his teeth and let the jerks of your pussy on his cock fade out, listening to your whimpers.

“You’re such a slut, cumming on this cock, after you acted like you didn’t want it.”

He thrust in again, one hand on your throat, until he pulled out. He began jerking off, kneeling between your thighs, and you didn't dare move.

You looked at his cock, so thick and long, and the expression on your face made him smirk. He grabbed one of your breasts and jacked off harder, until the spurts of cum hit your stomach.

“You better keep your mouth shut when we get back, if you don't want me to come to your house at night. Bet your pussy would like that.”

***************

Thank you for reading 🙏

Comments and reblogs are greatly appreciated ❤️

Follow @millafics and turn notifications on for fics updates

@pascalsanctuary @survivingandenduring

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chaengluva · 10 months ago

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Massive Deal [1]

This is the full story version of Too much of a massive deal, it will be a few chapters!

Regina George x Fem!Reader: Part 1: 3.7k words including intro

Btw, if you think things are going to fast or what not, this is like 3 of my wattpad chapters in one, so i don’t have to do to many updates and theres not as many parts.

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Introduction

It was really unrealistic, I mean, having a crush on Regina George? When you told your best friend she said she wasn't surprised, It was almost the same reaction when you told her you were lesbian. You tell your best friend everything, she's the only person you truly trust in your friend group. Her name is Bella Christensen

You love all your friends but you were friends with Bella during elementary school, you told her you were lesbian and you haven't told your family yet, she's been a really good friend about it and hasn't said anything.

The worst part about having a crush on Regina George is being related to her best friend, Gretchen, you guys don't talk much because she is always with Regina, you just think it would be weird dating your sisters best friend.

Like the thought of Bella dating Gretchen makes you want to throw up inside.

You know this crush was just some silly teenager thing that will go away, you know she's not lesbian and most likely homophobic, so when you get into your senior year of high school you're plan for the year is to study hard (MOVE ON FROM REGINA GEORGE) and to have fun.

What will happen? Will Regina like You? Will people turn against each other?

“I fucking hate High School”

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The sound of your loud alarm started to go off, waking you up instantly and you groaned, summer break goes way too quickly. You take all the energy inside you to move your hand and press the snooze button on your phone, wanting to sleep for some extra you close your eyes but then open again at the sound of your door opening, it was Gretchen, what the fuck is she doing up this early?

She made her way to your closet and started throwing your clothes everywhere, making a mess. "Gretchen! What are you doing?" Your sister rolls her eyes answering, "I'm looking for my white blouse, the one you wore on the last day of school." You get up out of bed and rush to your closet before she ruins anything else and searches through your doors, finally finding it. "Here it is." She smiles slightly, "Thanks sis." You smile and think about heading back to bed but you decide not to, you know if you went back in you would never get out again.

You looked through your closet, groaning seeing the limited choices, "Ugh! I have nothing to wear," You looked at the weather, wanting to dress appropriately for the weather. You see that it is quite warm, you sigh and leave your room, sneaking into your sister's room. She has a lot of good clothes.

You take a blue shirt and a white skirt, hoping that she doesn't notice you in her room. When you leave her room you bump into her, hiding the clothes you took behind your back (as if she hasn't already seen them) So she doesn't get mad, your sister sighs. "Fine, I'll do your makeup too."

She brings you into her bathroom and does a small natural look, and finding you a better outfit, you look at yourself in the mirror, "Damn, all the boys will be crushing on you." Gretchen says, applying a little more mascara, you hesitate but nod at her works, not wanting to tell her the truth.

"I'll add lip gloss after you eat." She smiles and the two of you go down stairs, greeting your mom before going to the kitchen to get some breakfast. Gretchen has some avocado toast and juice, while you just had some cereal.

The two of you sit on the table, she talks about how she is excited to start the year. It's crazy how different she can be at home compared to at school. Everyone in school knows that the two of you are related but you never sit with each other.

You thought about how you would move on from Regina, your best idea was to just ignore her at all costs, every time you see her you stare at her with heart eyes, but she will never dare to look back at you. You sigh deeply, lost in your thoughts, thinking about the first time you realised you liked Regina.

Flashback

You were sitting with Bella, it was the last first day of middle school, you decided to start the year by trying out for the cheer team, you were very nervous because you know that everyone sitting here as already tried out and made the team, you were the only, who was trying to do it for the first time.

They called your name, Bella cheered loudly, you giggled, getting up off the bench, you stood there nervously as the judges sighed a few things, you stood there awkwardly. They told you to start and you started to do your audition, you did a few tricks, after you were done you saw that there were smiles on their faces.

They all told you that they would be in contact, you nodded and walked back to your friend, she smiled brightly, giving you a big hug. "You did so well!" You smiled, hugging her back, you also felt like you did quite well.

The two of you walked out of the gym and walked into the change room so you could change out of your sweaty clothes, when you walked in, you gasped at the sight. Regina George standing there in her bra and tight leggings, you have never taken a close look at her body before, you must have been staring for a while because you had lost focus for everything else that was going on.

Bella waved her hand in front of your face to make you come back into reality. You jumped looking at her and she looked at you with a confused look, walking away she could change. Fuck, you were like every guy at the school, you had a crush on Regina George.

End of flashback

A similar situation was happening out, while you were thinking of this moment you were clearly spaced out, Gretchen shook your body to bring you back into reality. Damn, moving on from Regina will be harder than you think, she can still make you feel the same butterflies like she did in middle school.

"Regina is giving me a lift to school if you want to come." You thought that would be awkward as hell, you were honestly confused as to why Gretchen was asking you. You awkwardly laugh saying, "Oh.. It's okay, Bella is picking me up!" Gretchen nods, grabbing her purse, before walking out the door.

You grab your phone and call Bella, she answers instantly, "Hey! Y/n!" You smile at how happy she sounds, "Hey Bella, when will you be here?" You ask, only so you can know how long you have to get ready. "I'll be there in 10 minutes, " You rolled your eyes, Bella would always be late.

It was like Bella could hear you rolling your eyes, "What! My alarm didn't go off!" She defended, making up an excuse. You giggled, "Yeah sure, I'll see you soon." You say hanging up the phone, you look over and see that Gretchen didn't put her dishes away, being the better sister, you get up and put both yours and hers in the sink.

You go upstairs to brush your teeth and fix your hair, you put on both deodorant and perfume, you start to apply your lip gloss but you hear a car horn beeping which messes you up, and she doesn't stop. "Jesus Christ! Bella I'm coming!" You yell, as if she could hear you.

You grab your back and quickly rush outside the door, rushing into her car, you give Bella a massive hug, you don't feel her hug back which you find strange, you pull away and you see that she is looking at you with a glare, "What?"

"Y/n, you look like a fucking plastic."

Bella parked outside the school smiling happily at you. "So" Bella started, "When will I decorate my car park?" She asked, you smiled back, hitting her leg, "Soon." You smile, getting out of her car, waiting for her to come to your side so you could link arms and walk into school.

"I'm so annoyed we don't have many classes together," Bela groaned, leaning her head on her shoulder, smiling at you, you look into her eyes and smile at her, "Yeah but one class is better than none." You mention she nods, taking her head off her shoulder.

"I can't believe we have maths first." Bella groans, walking into homeroom sitting down on the table, you sat down on the table next to her, rolling your eyes at her, "At least we are in the same class first period." You mention but Bella jumps in, "I have PE right after!" You laugh at her, "That sucks, I have English."

You roll your eyes, throw your head on the desk, lie down until the bell rings, Bella laughs at you, "Jesus Christ, first day and you're already falling asleep in class?" You look up at her, glaring into her eyes, making her laugh more. "Don't try to be intimidating with me."

The bell finally rang, everyone was happy to be out of the homeroom, but not excited to start class. You and Bella decide to take the long way to get to class because the two of you really hate maths.

Luckily, maths class went quickly and now you were in English class, you didn't see anyone that you knew in the class so you decided to sit alone, on the table in the back. Soon after the class started Regina walked in, not even looking at the teacher or saying sorry for being late.

You looked around the class and noticed that the only available seat was next to you, so you moved your stuff without her asking, for the whole lesson you were breathing heavily while she didn't look your way once, she was actually just on her phone the whole lesson.

Probably texting her stupid boyfriend.

Finally, the class was over and it was time for the first break. You met up with Bella, who was sitting under a tree. Eventually, all your other friends join up, you were a bit sad that a few had moved schools, but the group was still close, it just wouldn't be the same.

"So how your guys' classes?." Jennie asks, smiling, you groan, "I have Regina In my English class." Everyone else groans, feeling bad for you but Bella smirks, hitting your shoulder, making sure to do it quickly so no one sees.

"I can't believe you're related to Gretchen." Charlie commented, giggling looking over at Jennie, you chuckled, nodding your head, "Yeah me too, but at the end of the day she is my sister and I love her." The two girls just roll their eyes, you look at Bella who gives you a sympathetic look, you just shake your head, you weren't bothered by them.

The four of you continue to talk, none of you notice Oliver Kim walking over to you. "Hey, Y/n, I was just wondering if you like to go out tonight." You look at Bella, still feeling slightly bad to reject some nice looking people. You open your mouth to answer, but you hear someone else talk. "She would love to!" Oliver smiles, "Great, I'll text you the details."

"Jennie!" You exclaim, "What! You have never been on a date with a guy! you deserve this." She says, rubbing your knee. You sighed knowing she was just trying to be a good friend and she doesn't know that you are lesbian, so you try your best not to get hurt by it.

The bell rang, everyone quickly gathered their stuff and rushed out to their class. You walked to your chemistry class, it sucked that it was on the opposite side of the school. You walk into the class and observe the people in the class, you see Janis sitting alone.

You weren't friends with Janis but you weren't enemies, you smiled, walking over, "Hey!" you say, she smiles, looking up at you, you smile back, "Can I sit here?" You ask, feeling a little nervous, she smiled at you, moving her stuff so you could sit down, you sat down smiling at her, taking your stuff out, she looked over at you and smiled.

You took notes on the lesson, It was around half way through the lesson, you felt Janis tap you on the shoulder, "What other classes are you in this year." She smiled at you, you smiled back at her, telling her what classes you were in, you were surprised and happy to find out that.

You put your attention back to the teacher, you wrote down a lot of notes because if you were being honest, you were scared for this year, so you wanted to do your best in the classes. At the end of class, you and Janis had art next, "Hey so, do you want to walk to art together."

You smile nodding, walking to art with her, you start to talk about what you guys did over the summer. You walk inside and you smile when you see Damien, you know Janis and Damien are close so you let Janis go off to be with him. "Damien! You know Y/n." She smiles, He smiles back, "Of course I do, she's beautiful!" He exclaims, you giggle, looking down slightly shy with the complement.

"Class, Listen up!" Everyone turns their heads to the teacher, she continues to speak once everyone is paying attention, "Today we will paint freestyle, you can paint whatever you want." You smile, go through the paint box grabbing what you need, you look up images on your laptop, to get some ideas on what you can paint.

You settle on a landscape of a flower field, you put on an apron because you know Gretchen would murder you. You started to work on the painting, making sure to stay very focused. Janis sees this as a perfect opportunity to talk to Damien.

She pulls him into the other side of the classroom, making sure that there is no way that you would be able to hear, leaning in close she opens her mouth to talk, "Girl, you're way too close!" Damien says, too loud for Janis' liking. She quickly shushes him, backs up slightly and whispers.

"I think I like y/n."

Damien looked at You then looked at Janis, "You.. Like her?" Janis nods quickly. Damien rolls her eyes. "She's like the straightest girl here." Damien exclaimed, Janis hit him on the shoulder. "Ow!" He said, grabbing his shoulder, Janis rolled her eyes at him saying, "It shouldn't hurt that bad.." He glares at her his arm didn't really hurt, he was just being dramatic. "Anyway, you can't assume someone's sexuality!" Janis said a little too loudly, grabbing the attention of a few people.

"Look, my point is that. She's really pretty." Janis smiles, looking at You as if she could get lost in your eyes, "You know she's related to Gretchen." Damien whispers, Janis looks back at him, rolling her eyes before saying, "So what? You literally date Regina's ex boyfriend." Damien hits Janis softly, not too hard to the point where it hurts, they go back to greet you, gasping at the amazing process.

"Wow! You did that all just now?" Janis exclaims happily, you nod but don't say anything back, you don't want to lose your focus on the artwork, Janis smiles behind you, admiring your focus in the artwork, you have no Idea how she is looking at you, but she is looking at you the same way you looked at Regina George in middle school, the time you realised you liked her.

You looked back and she looked away, making you smile brightly. The teacher says that the bell will ring soon so everyone should start to pack up. You signed, packing your things and cleaning the supplies. You waved goodbye to Janis and Damien, knowing you would see Janis in PE.

You head to the cafeteria, smiling when you see your best friend, you sit down on the table, sitting next to Bella, you decide to wait for the line to die down before getting food.

You smile at her but she doesn't smile back. You look at her confused. "What's up?" You ask, honestly confused. She pulls you close so no one else hears, "I'm saying this before they come, aren't you worried about that date with Oliver tonight?"

You sigh, you had forgotten about that. You're very self-conscious so texting him or bailing on him wasn't even an option, and Bella knew this. She tried to comfort you the best she could because she knew as soon as Charlie and Jennie would come over, they would not shut up about it.

You heard the two girls walk over and just like you and Bella guessed, they didn't shut up. "Oh my god! I can't believe you're going out with Oliver Kim!" Jennie said happily, "Yeah!" You say, trying your best to actually sound happy, you look over at the line and see that it's smaller now. "I'm going to get my lunch." Hoping up, you go and grab a tray and line up to get your lunch.

In the line you could feel someone's eyes on on, they were standing next to you and you couldn't make out who it was, you decided to glance to the side to see if you can make out who it is, you smile brightly when you see it is Janis, pay for your food then sit down, smiling at your friends, "How was your classes?" Charlie asks, looking at you, smiling, you say, "Good, we did painting in art already!" They all smile brightly.

Lunch goes by quickly and you have to rush to the change room to get in your PE clothes, when you get in the change room with Janis you gasp at the sight, it was like you were back in middle school again, Regina George was there, in her sports bra. She was in the same PE class as you.

You don't notice how long you are staring at her, a loud voice brings you back to reality, it was Janis this time. She pulled you to the side, a space where no one could see. "You were staring at Regina.." She says, with almost a hint of sadness in her voice, you shake your head, wanting to deny it. "I wasn't! I swear."

She rolls her eyes, "You were staring at her boobs!" She whispers, yells, you sigh, looking down at the floor. "Y/n?" She asks, making you look up. "Yeah?" You ask, wanting her to continue, "Are you.. Gay?" She asks and you stare at her in shock, "No, I'm not!" You exclaim, scarred that Bella might have told someone. "I think you might be.." She adds, which makes you more upset. "You have no right to tell me my sexuality."

You push past her and go to change into your PE clothes, not bothering to even look at her when you exit the change room, or on the field, the teacher asks everyone to get into two teams and you try your best to not be in the same team as Janis, but just your luck you ended up on her team, along with Regina and a few other people.

The teacher asked everyone to do soccer drills, you couldn't help but stare at Regina, she looked so hot in a high ponytail. Fuck, you're doing in again y/n. You brush yourself out of it this time, you focus on ignoring how pretty Regina looks and ignore Janis' many attempts to talk to you, the only thing you should focus on is worrying about the date tonight.

For a boy you don't even like, the gender you don't like.

You must have been lost in your thoughts because the next thing you remember is a ball being kicked to your stomach and you were clutching it, struggling to catch your breath, you look over and see to girls laughing, you don't know their names but you can tell that they are new and already don't like you. "Hey! Assholes!" You hear someone yell, but you can't make out who it is.

You feel someone grab your hand and sit you down, you look over and see Janis, she is holding your water bottle and allows you to drink some of her water. You look at her with sad eyes, "I'm sorry for being a bitch." Janis just giggles, "It's okay, I'm sorry for assuming anything." You smile, nodding your head, drinking the water that Janis gave you. God you're good at covering your sexuality up, it's become natural.

"Hey, you okay?" You look up and you're surprised to see Regina standing there asking if you are okay, you try your best to play it cool but she is wearing a white top and a black bra, you try your best not to stare so you just quickly answer, "Yeah, I'm okay now." She nods, running away to other people in the class, your eyes follow her, a smile slowly creeps up on your face. "Y/n." You hear Janis call out. You turn your head back to her, "Yeah?"

"Wanna hang out with Damien and I tonight? We are going to stay at mine and watch movies, I'll give you a lift to school!" You frown slightly, you want to go, but you have other plans, "Sorry I can't tonight." You can see that she looks sad, "But hey! If my plans end early! I'll join you guys!" Her facial expression changes and she smiles brightly, "Can't wait!"

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Now this is gonna be a little confusing, let me know if you would like a page that has a list of all the main characters/oc’s because there are quite a few.

#regina george #regina x reader #regina george x reader #regina x fem!reader #regina george 2024 #janis imi'ike #janis imiike x reader #mean girls 2024 #reneé rapp #auli'i cravalho #mean girls #gxg #wlw #lesbian #fluff #angst #gretchen wieners #oc

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violetsaffron5 · 2 months ago

Text

Beautiful Disaster (13)

← Chapter 12 • series masterlist • Chapter 14 →

13 | Glass

Pairing: Gojo Satoru x f!Reader

A party at Satoru's house ends in disaster.

words: 3.9k

AN: Hey guys! Not sure if anyone is even reading this story anymore, but I fell of the face of the planet for a while, sorry about that. Things IRL were crazy with work and my personal life, and I just didn't have it in me to write anything. Things are much better now and I was in the writing mood, so decided to give this one a little update, since I already had the chapter mostly written already.

I will be going through it to proofread/edit before I do the last two chapters (which will probably be posted together).

Ao3 • Discord 18+ • Social Media • Series Masterlists

April 2012

Taking a deep breath, cinching the robe around your waist a little tighter, you step into the class. There’s a murmur from students setting up their supplies, getting their easels into position, and canvases ready to draw on.

The walls are covered in art from various classes and years passed - even some portraits of past nude models hang on the wall as examples of creative liberties and proper proportions. Something many artists have a hard time getting a handle on.

As you stand in front of the class, a little stool next to you so you can sit on occasion while the other students draw, you look around the room, making eye contact with Choso.

He gives a small, shy smile, like he always does and you swallow thickly - feeling the way your chest and neck heat with the flush creeping up to your cheeks.

Satoru wasn’t particularly… pleased when you told him you were taking an extracurricular art class this semester. Less pleased when he realized Choso was in your class.

And even less so when you told him you offered to be the nude class model.

The decision was easy though, despite his grievances. His only real one was jealousy and not wanting everyone in the class to ogle you - which you assured him wasn’t likely going to be the case. You have no reason to be ashamed, and everyone who’s taking this class knew this was an assignment. Besides, the professor has made it very clear that if anyone says anything or makes you uncomfortable, they’ll fail and be removed from the class.

You offered to be the model when you found out it’s a paid gig, and you’ll take an opportunity that arises to get your own money - money your mom doesn’t need to know about and money she won’t have any reason to grill you on how or where you spend it.

Once you explained this, Satoru relented a little, though you’re confident his problems have more to do with Choso than anything else. Which is ridiculous considering there hasn’t been anything more than a friendship between you two. It’s not like you have a history with Choso like Satoru does with Mei.

“Whenever you’re ready,” the professor states after closing the classroom door. You look around, taking in the overhead string lights giving the space a warm glow - the shades are drawn on the windows, stopping anyone from outside the room from witnessing what’s about to happen.

Licking your lips, and looking up at the ceiling, you draw the ribbons on the robe, letting the soft, fluffy material fall to the floor. The air is cold in the room, immediately perking your nipples as you purse your lips, feeling a wave of goosebumps cover your flesh.

The rustling of utensils being grabbed and the scratching on canvases immediately fill the room. Gaining a little more confidence, you look back at the class; Choso’s deep black eyes are the first - and only - you see in the room. At the beginning of the class, you thought it might be more awkward with him here, being the only person you know outside of class and seeing you vulnerable in front of everyone. It’s more comforting than you could have imagined.

In reality, you don’t know him all that well, but he’s always been kind, and he hangs around Suguru a lot. You also don’t miss the way his eyes trail the length of your body before he busies himself with what he’s supposed to be doing.

There are several times during class when your eyes meet, you give a little shrug and smile and he grins full-on, laughing to himself quietly as he continues drawing your form.

When class comes to an end, the professor allows you to leave to dress in the bathroom down the hall and come back since he has a few announcements.

Once you’ve changed you take your place next to Choso as the teacher drones on about maintaining professionalism from seeing a classmate naked and urging everyone to continue working on their canvases on their own time, turning in their finished work at the next class.

Except for you, of course, being exempt from having to draw anything and getting an automatic A on this assignment.

“Thanks for drawing me naked and not being a perv about it,” You whisper to Choso, nudging his shoulder gently with yours.

He flashes his brows, chuckling, “That’s kind of my thing, you know - trying not to be a creep.”

Slinging your bag over your shoulder, you wait for Choso to finish packing his art supplies, slipping the canvas under his arm, gesturing for you to walk ahead of him out of the room.

“Are you coming to the party tonight? Haven’t seen you around the last few.”

Choso gives a wistful smile, “Yuji’s grandpa is sick, in the hospital so I’ve been joining him on his visits. But I think he’s hanging out with his friends tonight.”

“Great!” Smiling widely, you turn and walk backward toward your next class as Choso stops in front of the stairs, on the way to his, “Then I’ll see you there!”

Steam rolls out from the bathroom door when you open it, the cool breeze from Satoru’s room hitting your skin, immediately making you shiver. He’s lying on the bed, arm relaxed by his head, long legs crossed at the ankles.

As soon as you emerge, he lets his phone drop to his chest, a heated gaze watching as you meander around, combing through your hair and deciding what to wear for their house party tonight.

Per usual, there’s a fight tonight starring yours truly. How the higher-ups at the school haven’t figured this out, even with Toji acting as an “inside man” - for lack of a better term - is beyond you. You’d think schools would want to investigate why several students show up with black and blue bruises and cut lips and eyebrows every so often, but apparently, they have better things to do.

Satoru has gotten off the bed, wrapping his arms around your waist and slipping them under the towel until it becomes loose enough to drop to the floor. He pulls you close to him, one large hand splayed on your stomach, the other playful tweaking your pert nipple while he kisses down your neck.

You let out a soft sigh when he nibbles your lobe, before whispering, “You smell so fucking good,” pushing his hips into your ass so you can feel his growing length.

With a sharp gasp, he spins you around, setting you on his dresser, wrapping your arms around his neck as he continues nipping and kissing your neck. And almost inadvertently, as soon as he slips his hand between your thighs, you close your legs a little tighter.

Satoru pulls away, brows knitted as you sigh and purse your lips. His tone comes out harsher, more exasperated than you think he really means, “What’s wrong?”

The truth is your heart fucking aches at the state of your relationship. Things were so great, until they just weren’t anymore - there was a part of you that always thought people who described being in a hard relationship felt like they were drowning were just being dramatic. But it honestly feels that way.

Your chest is heavy and your heart beats so loud that sometimes it’s the only thing you can hear; your throat feels so tight you can’t catch your breath. There are nights where you’ve stayed up wondering if he feels the same way but in reality, you’re not sure he’d ever tell you.

He avoids conversations like the plague and is so much better at hiding his feelings and playing them off than you are.

Since the Okinawa trip, there’s been a lot weighing on your mind about how realistic this relationship with Satoru is. He’s fun and makes you feel alive with his silly ideas and schemes, makes you feel heard and seen. And along that same vein, there are times where you feel simultaneously loved and unwanted.

Afterall, he’s the one who wanted to keep things casual but relented only because you wanted a relationship and it almost feels as if you forced his hand with that. Sure, he made his own choice, but even then, there are things you can’t deny or look away from.

There’s no hiding Mei is a point of contention in your relationship. She has been since before it even started. And it was something you thought would go away - that she would see the two of you together and go find someone else to sink her claws into but she just keeps coming back, and for whatever reasons, he won’t let her go either.

Satoru told you their relationship was primarily physical - that there’s no real interest in one another beyond that, and the only reason they were involved to begin with was because of their family businesses being tied together. More convenient than anything.

So why won’t he let her go? And is it fair to even ask him to? Outside of Suguru, Shoko and even Utahime, she is one of his oldest friends.

You’ve also been wondering recently how much Satoru respects you. Considering how many times you’ve talked about how uncomfortable you are with this… relationship with Mei and how it hurts you, nothing has changed despite his repeated promises.

And it’s not logical to think he’d change.

Satoru groans when you hop off the dresser, grabbing your shirt and slipping it on, “I’m fine. Just not in the mood, I don’t feel great tonight.”

“You’re never in the mood anymore.” There’s no mistaking the annoyance in his tone as grabs his glasses to shield his eyes, no doubt rolling them behind the dark glass.

Despite the lie you’ve been telling, you want nothing more than to have him, let him have his way with you as he has so many times before. But you’re not emotionally ready to go there right now - you need time to think and you can’t do that when he’s buried ten inches deep in you almost every night.

So the physical aspect of your relationship has taken a hit. You’ve tried talking about Okinawa with him, bringing up everything with Mei once again - but just like always, Satoru says you’re being dramatic, making a mountain out of a molehill.

But it’s clearly not nothing since it bothers you and it’s clear as day to everyone around.

Satoru doesn’t bother staying by your side during most of the party, opting to meet up with some of his classmates. You try not to pay too much attention to him, but you sneak glances over every now and again.

He chats, a drink in hand while laughing and animatedly waving his free hand around while telling a story.

“Hello?” A pale hand waves in front of your face, snapping a few times, breaking you out of your trance - apparently you were staring longer than you thought.

Blinking a few times and turning your head, you look at Choso, “I’m sorry - what were you saying?”

He gives a soft smile, glancing between you and Satoru for a moment, “Everything okay?”

Pursing your lips and sighing heavily, you nod slowly, “Yeah… It’s just…” You trail off, not sure how much or what to actually say. It doesn’t take long to make a decision though, since looking back over to Satoru shows Mei has joined his little soiree. “He says nothing is happening, but he’s always with Mei.” You nod your head in that direction.

Choso purses his head and nods, “Yeah. I was wondering about that.”

“Great.” Your voice is monotone. Because this just confirms you’re not the only person who sees them together constantly - that it’s not just you being high maintenance or a pain in the ass. It is a real problem, and one Satoru refuses to acknowledge.

“Why don’t we,” Choso starts, eyes flickering between yours for a moment before pointing off to the side, “take some shots?”

Your eyes trail to where he’s pointing - a small group of people around a small table, just big enough for someone to lay on and take a body shot. A smile spreads across your face with amusement for two reasons: Shoko is currently taking a shot glass out of Utahime’s mouth and tipping it back and because you’re feeling a little petty tonight.

Maybe it’s the alcohol you’ve already consumed, your inhibitions are lowered but you don’t care. If Satoru gets to have someone other than you hanging with him all the time, going on family outings during the holidays and hanging on him twenty-four seven - then why can’t you do the same?

Choso’s questioning stare is innocent, so there’s a chance he won’t be up for this - there’s a part of you that wonders if he meant just regular shots, and not specifically body shots. You get your answer however, when you agree and a wide smile spreads across his face.

While you walk to the table and lay back on it once Utahime has gotten up, Choso busies himself with getting salt, a lime and a shot of tequila.

Shoko is off to the side, staring daggers at you before asking, “What the hell are you doing?”

You smile and shrug, “Playing his game. I’m tired of being the one that gets hurt all the time.”

“This is a really stupid fucking idea,” Utahime chimes in to your surprise. It’s not often she adds her two cents on your relationship - normally she just adds how stupid she thinks Satoru is.

Choosing not to answer, you lay back and turn to face Satoru. He’s not paying attention, however Mei is, you glare, lick your lips and lift your shirt just enough to expose your navel.

“Ready?” Choso asks and you nod, but he keeps a hold of the tequila shot, rather than putting it in your mouth.

Small grains of salt hit just below your belly button and then the feel of a small metal ball and cool tongue trail up. The reaction your body gives is normal; stomach clenching, breath hitching and thighs closing ever so slightly - like a reminder of all the times Satoru has done the same to you.

Looking down at Choso was a mistake - he has a mischievous smirk spread across his lips and heat in his eyes. And rather than take the shot in his hand, he presses his lips to yours. Your eyes widened in shock, because this was not part of the plan - it was supposed to just be a normal body shot, just something to make Satoru a little jealous and hopefully realize how he’s been treating you.

Panicked, you sit up and fix your shirt - Choso winks, placing the glass to his lips just as a fist connects with his jaw in a deafening crack. Satoru is seething, nostrils flared as he grabs a fist full of Choso’s shirt and pulls him in for another punch to the face.

Choso isn’t caught off guard this time, landing his own blow on Satoru’s cheek, and then his ribs.

“Stop!” You scream hysterically, covering your mouth with your hand, because this was not the mess you wanted to cause - this wasn’t supposed to happen!

Before you can take a step forward, a large hand grips your shoulder. Suguru is next to you, shaking his head before stepping in to separate the guys. Panicked, you look at Shoko who has a look of disappointment written on her face, Utahime is shaking her head, watching as Suguru stands between the two.

Satoru runs a hand down his face, Choso wipes his lip with the back of his hand as Suguru says something to them - when he’s done, Satoru stalks out of the room and up the stairs without so much as a glance in your direction.

“Why,” it’s a small noise that leaves your lips, not loud enough for anyone to hear other than yourself. Looking at Choso with upturned brows, you shake your head slightly. If you had known he planned on kissing you, there’s no way you would have agreed to do this.

He must have seen you mouth the word because Choso walks over to you, brows bunched together. “Because he treats you like shit. And you just let it happen time and time again.”

A scoff leaves your lips, “I love Satoru - you know what, I can’t deal with this right now.”

Onlookers move out of your way as you make your way to and up the steps to Satoru’s bedroom. The room is quiet, light off except the illumination of the lights peeking out from the partially closed bathroom door.

For the first time, probably ever, you knock on the door to make your presence known before poking your head inside. Satoru’s standing, head hanging between his shoulders, leaning on his palms on the cool countertop.

“Satoru,” a step forward with your hand outreached for him, wanting to check on the cuts on his lip, and the bruise blooming across his cheek, “I -”

“Stop.” He interjects, tone raspy, lifting his head to look in the mirror but not looking in your direction.

A sigh leaves your lips, because of course he doesn’t want to talk about this. He would rather let his emotions show physically - through sex or fighting - rather than sit and have a two minute conversation to talk things through.

“Okay…” You’re really not sure what to do in this situation, stay and potentially make it worse or leave him to cool off and come try and talk to him later. Opting for the latter, you take a step back - you really need to talk with Choso about what happened too, you just needed a second to take a step back and see Satoru. To make sure he didn’t need any bandages or some other medical care. With the exception of the few scrapes and bruises, he seems physically fine.

Turning and opening the door, a large hand reaches over your head and pushes the door fully closed.

“Where are you going?” Satoru asks, voice annoyed.

“To check on Choso.” It comes out quieter than you intend, which Satoru’s body heat radiating against your back, his hand still firmly pressed against the door, yours on the knob.

“Why? Kissing him wasn’t enough?”

Heat flares through your veins at the comment, because he’s acting like you asked for him to kiss you. And that was never the intention - you would never do anything like that, and he knows it - especially with your history.

He’s just trying to piss you off too.

Turning around, you snap at him, pointing a finger in his chest, “Maybe because my boyfriend went insane and beat the shit out of him,” he grins slightly at that comment, teeth pink from fading blood. “And because -”

Because you saw the way Choso looked at you when he suggested body shots. Knew it would piss Satoru off to no end. Because you were already questioning what Choso was wanting to do before you agreed. It was like you lost your mind in the moment, in all of the feelings and anger and hurt at everything that has happened, and continues to happen in this relationship.

“Because this is my fault.” Your voice is quiet, shoulders slumped, guilt written on your faces as tears well in your eyes.

Satoru’s arms are around you the moment the first tear drips from the corner of your eye, holding you close and rocking side to side gently.

“Don’t leave me,” He whispers into your hair and you’re sure he doesn’t mean physically, in this moment.

“I’m not - I won’t.” You say between sniffles, pulling back to look into his ocean blue eyes, showing his own uncertainty in this situation - a look you’re not used to from him. “Satoru, that was scary. It looked like you were trying to murder him.”

“I wanted to.”

Your brows pinch together at his admission, “You’re insane.”

“In a good way?” The teasing tone to his voice is starting to come back.

A small laugh leaves your lips, “How is there a good way to be insane?”

He thinks for a moment, pulling you back into his muscular chest before shrugging, “Dunno just, don’t go to him. Okay?”

Closing your eyes, you nod against him, taking in the warmth and safety you feel in his arms, hoping he’ll explain his reaction to that, “Why did you punch him?”

It takes several minutes of standing in silence, holding one another to realize he’s stopped swaying you back and forth, a motion you found comforting when he was doing it, and the odds of him answering are lower and lower with every passing second.

After another few minutes you pull away and sigh, wiping the smeared makeup under your eyes away.

“I don’t want him touching you,” Satoru says hurriedly when you open the bathroom door again, grabbing your free wrist, “Let alone kissing you.”

That’s not a real answer - just some fucked up possessiveness he feels he needs to display because another guy is clearly interested in you. Which is ironic considering he said the two of you could see other people before he agreed to try dating.

And clearly he forgets is attached to him at the hip anytime she’s around, but how dare anyone but Satoru do that with you. It’s a stupid double standard and one you’re tired of.

He lets your arm go when you shake your head slowly, which breaks your heart. Wishing he would fight for you right now, for your relationship - not physically fight, but actually listen to each other and work together to make things better.

Maybe it is time to call it quits. Having these feelings in your relationship continuously is not healthy and it’s taking a toll on you. At this point you’re not sure what’s worse - finding your boyfriend cheating on you with your own mother, or this cycle you found yourself in with Satoru.

There’s a deep stuttering sigh behind you, to your surprise, “Things haven’t been great between us recently,” he says quietly, clearly unsure how to say what’s on his mind, “And I - fuck -” he groans, running his hands up and down his fast several times, “I don’t know, okay, but I don’t want to see you with anyone else.”

Your brows are raised as you turn to look at Satoru with surprise, not having anticipated getting any sort of answer. It’s not much, but it speaks volumes that he’s admitted your relationship isn’t in a good place right now - honestly you weren’t sure he was even aware of it. He never wants to talk about these things, he’d rather have sex and show you how he feels by the way he delicately spreads your legs, teasingly kisses up your thighs and makes love to you.

But it also hurts that the only time he says he loves you, with the exception of the first few times, is when you feel like you have to force it out of him, or when he’s buried deep in your cunt.

“Are we gonna make it?” You whisper back. And for the first time in your relationship, find yourself wondering when this relationship will meet its inevitable end.

But maybe there is hope. He’s admitted this - maybe it’ll just take more time for him to find the words and continue learning to open up.

Satoru kisses the top of your head, opening the restroom door and pulling you gently to his bed, laying down behind you and covering you both with a throw blanket before whispering back, “We’ll make it... Just don’t leave me.”

So you don’t.

@petalsrdead @sofiaconlaz @lovelylashawnalee @s-witch-bitch @watyousayin @desthevirgo @coffee-on-a-rainyautumn @musababy @sagejin @ritsatoru @faewithsnakes @erenputurchildreninsideme @lex-dear @hvziers @babybae-shisui @sugurunicorn @niki-sun @lilith412426 @sofiaconlaz @lxvephxbic @iam-mia9 @laylasbunbunny @creolequeen11210 @xiaosie @lem-hhn @yogurttea @slut-jr @crystxlline @ritsatoru @abba-simp @myabae @etherealkakashi @hyperfixationsporfavor @yihona-san06 @ambersea7 @knightoflove

#jujutsu kaisen fanfic #jujutsu kaisen x reader #violetsaffronfic #jjk fanfic #jjk smut #jjk x reader #gojo satoru smut #gojou satoru x reader #gojo smut #gojo x y/n #satoru gojo #gojo satoru #gojo x reader #gojo x you #satoru gojo x you #satoru gojo x y/n #BD

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canyouiimagine · 10 months ago

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My favs

Y'all know I can be a little lazy so... I will be updating this in the next few days 👀 but I absolutely love these fics and I want to say a big thank you to the people that wrote them 🫶🏾🩶.

@non-stop-imagines

❤︎ Cute (CL16 x Black Fem Content Creator!Reader) In which Charles thinks you're really cute and it gets annoying. ❤︎ Repeat That | 0 | I.1 | I.2 (MV1 x Black Content Creator!Reader) ❤︎ Handled (DR3 x Black Actress!Reader) ❤︎ Calm Down (OP81 x Black Fem!Reader) Oscar has his own ways of calming his you down. ❤︎ Valentine (LN4 x Hamilton!Reader) In which Lando falls hard and you don't know what to do.

@serpenttines

❤︎ Clarity | II (CL16 x Black Mean Girl!Reader) Charles is a taken man, so when he starts having feeling for another woman things get complicated. especially since y/n isn't known for being the nicest person. ❤︎ Play To Win (ex!CL16, LH44 x Black!Reader) You don't know what game Charles was playing at, but you wanted needed to win. ❤︎ Call It Crazy | II (LH44 x ex Black!Reader) "you can say I'm crazy, if you want to that's true i'm crazy 'bout you" | "baby, when you finally, get to love somebody. guess what, It's gonna be me"

@saintslewis

❤︎ The Motherland (Platonic F1 Grid (not all) x Black Driver!Reader / LH44 x Black Driver!Reader) In which reader takes the f1 pilots to experience her culture and the beautiful country that is South Africa. ❤︎ Pink + White (CL16 x Black DJ!Reader) In which your relationship with Charles gets exposed so you decide to just hard launch. ❤︎ Get You (LN4 x Black!Reader) Joining a specific group of YouTubers on their channel wasn't something you'd envisioned for yourself but your friend, Ria, managed to get you into Quadrant. How Lando reacts is for you to keep reading 🤭 For OC readers: ❤︎ Renaissance (LH44 x fem!oc) The Browns and the Hamiltons have been neighbours for many years, Nadia and their oldest son, Lewis, not being as close as the families had hoped they would be. Years later, everyone drifts apart into different neighbourhoods, some others becoming one of the best drivers to ever grace the sport of Formula One however being a man of his stature, fame came along with it and so did the scandals. Can a fake marriage to a complete stranger help keep his image alive? let’s find out!

@thisismeracing

❤︎ King of manifesting (CL16 x Black Singer!Reader) You've been secretly dating Charles for a while, but fans can't believe it when the rumors start to go around. What do you mean a vroom-vroom Ferrari guy is dating their idol? ❤︎ All Because I Liked A Boy | II ( CL16 x Black Singer!Reader) Yn fell in love with Charles and secretly dated him for almost a year. She didn't consider, however, how fans would react seeing they used to love and still stan Charles' past relationship. What happens when their hidden love gets out in the open?

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askblueandviolet · 5 months ago

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Ask Box for Both is Open!

Fellas, is it gay to ask your buddy to go on a hunt, kill a guy together, and then harvest/eat the guy's organs together? I dunno, what do you think?

Ask box is open again! We are back to normal in terms of how asks are done :)))).

Update: Ask Box is NOT closed yet BUT- there are already so many asks in the box this time around that it's a bit crazy XDDDDDD. If this keeps going then I will have to close the box prematurely for my own sanity. So if you do have an ask that is not specifically related to this week's chapter (aka a general question) I highly recommend you saving it for next time! Thank you so much everyone :)))).

Double update: Seeing how many asks have already come through the box, I've decided to close it prematurely :'))))). The thing is, I do want to let more through, but the more that comes in, the lower the quality the answered asks will be 😭😭😭. I need to uphold some sort of standards for my own dignity and I can't burn myself out. So to those of you who couldn't get anything in, I really am sorry! Hopefully next week it might be better (but considering the content of next week's chapter, I highly doubt any of you will be any more tame than this week lmao). Perhaps one day I can figure out a solution to all of this if the packed inbox keeps happening (maybe I need to start being more selective with what questions get answered?)

#lego monkie kid #monkie kid #lmk #lego monkie kid fanart #monkie kid fanart #lmk fanart #lmk mayor #monkie kid mayor #monkie kid macaque #lmk macaque #blue and violet #Macaque's kitchen reveal?#It looks ordinary but that's probably because all of the weird stuff about it is hidden inside the cupboards and shelves

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jonquilyst · 7 months ago

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Total Drama Sims: Season 2

That's right, baby! We're back. Is your teenaged sim bored and wanting something epic and awesome to do to spend their summer? Does your teenaged sim want a brush of fame and notoriety? Well, you've come to the right place. Total Drama Sims, the freshest, awesomest reality show on simblr, is back for a 2nd season, and I'm ready for you all to send 14 more teenagers to compete in crazy, wacky challenges (safety/lack of danger not guaranteed) in pursuit of the grand prize!

WHAT'S NEW THIS SEASON?

To keep things fresh, TDS2 will be set in a new location and will have new gameplay mechanics! TDS has claimed an abandoned film lot in Del Sol Valley because this season, our challenges will be based off of movie genres, just like the 2nd season of TDS's inspiration!

As for our new gameplay mechanics, TDS2 will be introducing a double elimination (two people are eliminated rather than one), a team swap elimination (someone is eliminated, but instead of leaving the game, the eliminated person joins the other team), and purge challenges (instead of a vote, the worst-performing contestant of a challenge is automatically eliminated) to mix things up and keep the game interesting!

I am primarily looking for people who did NOT participate last season, or their sim got out early. However, everyone may still participate! I just want as many people as possible to get a chance to have their sim play 💖 A lot of people were interested last time and unfortunately spots filled up so fast that some people weren't able to participate because of it (That being said, to promote transparency, I am now REQUIRING RESERVATIONS! That means if you want to participate, you MUST contact me before submitting your sim. You can do this by DM'ing me or sending an ask).

Read on for a refresher on what this competition is all about and UPDATED submission rules (so if you had a sim compete last season, make sure to read them again!)

THE GIST:

This competition is, obviously, based off of the Total Drama series (a show that’s near and dear to me), but you do not need any background knowledge of this show to participate! The show (and this competition) functions similarly to a Bachelor Challenge, where contestants will be routinely eliminated until there is a sole winner.

This competition will also focus on the contestants building relationships with each other (hence the drama part, which is bound to happen when you put 14 teenagers together!)

SUBMISSION RULES:

Reservations for spots are first-come-first-serve. If for any reason you'd like to give up your reservation, contact me ASAP so I can give that reservation to someone else!

Your sim must be a teen

If you had a sim compete last season, you may not resubmit that same sim. I'm looking for an all-new cast!

No occults; contestants must be human only (to prevent unfair advantages)

Contestants must not have high-level skills (they can have some level of skill but nothing above lvl 5; also to prevent unfair advantages)

Any amount and type of CC is fine, just make sure to include it when you send your sim over to me ^^

Only one outfit per category please

Must be okay with slight changes in sims' appearances (as I may use different mods/presets than you do)

Must be okay with me writing dialogue for your sims (for confessionals (example from last season here). I read all entries down to the word and will try my very best to keep everyone in their intended character)

Must be okay with the possibility of your sim entering romantic relationships with other sims (PLEASE SPECIFY THEIR SEXUALITY/ROMANTIC ORIENTATION. Sims with unspecified sexualities/romantic orientations will be assumed to be pan). Nothing NSFW will be shown or mentioned, as of course I'll be portraying minors, but please let me know if you don't want your sim to enter any romantic relationships!

Please give your sims a backstory. The more detailed the better. Describe what they're like, why they're competing on Total Drama Sims, etc.

Your sim can have any traits/aspirations

HERE IS HOW THE COMPETITION WILL WORK:

The 14 contestants will be split into 2 teams of 7

The 2 teams will compete in challenges in attempt to win invincibility (safety from being voted off). The losing team will have to vote someone off (the winning team will not be part of voting)

This process continues until 7 contestants remain. Afterwards the teams dissolve and everyone competes individually (this is known as merge). This means that only 1 contestant can win invincibility; everyone else will be at risk for elimination

When merge occurs, all eliminated contestants at that point will be eligible to rejoin the game through a special challenge. The winner of that challenge will rejoin the game (bringing the number of contestants back to 8)

This process again continues until 2 contestants remain. In the finale, all eliminated contestants will vote for a winner

Challenges will occur half the time. The other half of the competition will be socialization days, where contestants are free to socialize with each other as they please

The competition will start with a socialization day first to establish relationships before the first challenge

If the numbers between teams get too uneven, then a team swap will occur to one random contestant on the larger team

Voting will be determined by relationship dynamics and how everyone did in the challenge. Contestants who do poorly are more likely to get voted. Contestants who have a negative relationship with each other are also more likely to get voted. Conversely contestants who have a positive relationship with each other are less likely to get voted. The contestant with the most votes at the end is eliminated. All of this will be determined by a spinner (in case of a tie I will use a random number generator to determine who’s out). This will also determine who wins at the end of the competition.

REWARD FOR THE WINNER:

This competition is mostly for the funsies, but whoever wins this competition will personally receive an actual reward from me! You have a choice between the following options:

Discord Nitro for 1 month

A tumblr badge

NO DEADLINE! Submissions will close when all 14 spots are filled/reserved. Please provide your sim's tray files as soon as convenient! (Lmk if you need help with this. I will teach you if you don't know how!)

I will be updating the number of spots reserved periodically and will announce when all 14 spots are taken, but if you're ever unsure, don't be afraid to DM me/send an ask!

That should be it! Please comment, DM me, or send an ask if you have any questions, and feel free to reblog or share this with anyone who might be interested in participating!

#TDS2

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abibliophobiaa · 2 years ago

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Summary: The year is 1988. After the loss of a beloved family member, you find yourself inheriting an old coffee shop. The quiet bartender at the Hideout across the street just so happens to catch your eye.

(8k+ words; eddie munson x afab!reader; sunshine!reader x grumpy!eddie vibes)

Warnings: Vignette style (sorta); Eddie’s post S4 trauma; panic attacks; nightmares; family member loss; grief; alcohol use; mild smut in later chapters so 18+; additional warnings to be added.

(AO3 Link) || Master List || NEXT CHAPTER ||

Winter, 1987

Everyone tells you it’s crazy.

They say to take the money and sell the property your grandfather left you in his will.

They say to take it and run.

They say don’t move to that town, the shop’s a lost cause, the place is cursed.

They tell you they’ve got murderers and the literal gates of hell were open there for a time.

‘Satanic worship,’ some say.

‘Cultists.’

‘Don’t want to mess with their kind; might rub off on you, make you evil.’

‘One of them Freaks.’

‘And whatever you do, don’t ever go to that trailer park,’ is the gravest of warnings you’re given. Apparently some girl was sacrificed there, and that’s when it all started.

Eyes ripped clean from her skull, body broken, just like two others around the same time.

Mangled beyond repair.

The work of pure evil.

‘They’ll tell you everything’s okay now,’ people warn you, ‘but it’s not.’

It’s all lies.

Meant to try and preserve that place.

To try and bring life to a town many believe should have been erased from the map.

But you’ve never been one for rumor or superstition.

So you pack some bags with your things and get in your car.

Hawkins it is.

All in all, Hawkins is…quaint.

A small town with a modest population. People turn and look as you pull into the shop parking lot with bags spilling out of your trunk and piled high in the backseat.

It’s the kind of town where they wave as you get out, curious gazes trying to get a glimpse of the new girl.

Only you’re not new. A stranger, maybe, but this town made up your formative years.

Memories of walking in the streets, getting ice cream with your grandfather, enjoying a day in the park, riding your bike in the neighborhood flit in your mind. They bring a smile to your face as you climb out of your car and take in the front of Sunshine Coffee.

It’s…different than you remember. Darker, somehow. But what’s darkness against a little love and light, you think, as you brush your fingers along the front door and push the key inside the lock.

A bell chimes above you and suddenly you’re a kid again, running inside to snatch a cookie freshly out of the back oven.

You brush your hands along your face to wipe your tears away at the memory as you step further into the building, taking in the place.

It seems like your grandfather had kept up with the place up until his death, or had at the very least hired someone to maintain it.

Sure, it needs a little love and updating, but it’s still got that homey feeling. The sort of place that immediately makes you feel at peace when you enter.

It’s so funny to think this is the same town.

This town people back home said is bestowed with a curse. It’s a little more rundown than you remember. Buildings here and there with wooden planks in windows, or burn scars, regrowing grass.

But it looks like it’s healing.

Like everything they’ve gone through is becoming more and more a thing of the past.

People seem joyous now, your heart swelling when you later see your new neighbors, an elderly couple that owns the local flower shop, and they offer to help you unpack.

You only thank them, telling them you’re more than okay, but that you appreciate the offer.

And they wish you well on your ways, saying they are proud to see your grandfather’s shop open up again.

You spend the afternoon walking back and forth from your car to the building, unpacking your things, making yourself at home.

Home.

This is home now.

What a funny thing?

Just wanna make you proud.

It takes a few weeks of deep cleaning and reorganizing, but Sunshine Coffee gets back to its normal splendor, with a few new personal touches thrown in.

You’ve updated the place, replaced the darker hues your grandfather preferred with paler shades.

Creams, tans, whites.

You’ve removed the drapery against the windows and swapped them for billowing curtains, delicate laces, whimsical accents.

The windows are full of fresh poinsettias and other red and green offerings. Whatever blooms are in season at the time, given to you as donations from your new neighbors—the sweet older couple who own the flower shop next door.

There’s also a new bar you don’t recognize from the last time you came to visit nearby.

The Hideout, the scrawling font declares.

It glows through your bedroom window at night.

The little upstairs apartment your grandfather had built is small, but suitable for your needs. It’s no more than a kitchen, bathroom, living area, and bedroom that you can access from the back entrance of the coffee shop. You have little other than some necessities at this point, but figure you’ll take a trip to the thrift store in the upcoming months once you have cash to spare to spruce things up to your liking.

At night, you can hear music filtering in through your windows—a different genre each night.

Most nights, it lulls you to sleep.

And it’s not long before the coffee shop is ready for opening, and a ‘NOW HIRING�� sign stands erect in the window.

Now we wait, you think, pride blooming in your chest.

Because it’s not much.

But it’s all yours.

A legacy upheld in a town that maybe needs a little bit of hope.

Max and El are life saviors that blow in a few days after you hang your sign up in the window alerting the whole town you’re here to stay and looking for help.

Opening day is set for a week from now, and you still need to train the potential staff on how to make the treats on your menu, and the coffees and teas you intend to offer.

And there they are, a flash of red and brown hair as they pull up one day in front of the cafe and knock on the front window. You can’t help but think they’re solicitors at first. You’ve really not ventured far from your shop and apartment yet, still getting used to the new town you’d only visited over the summers throughout your childhood.

You interview them both at the same time, finding them more than capable, and offer them to start training that afternoon if they’re available. Your grandfather had left enough in his will to ensure you have a little money to last you for a bit, and until you have a steady stream of customers you intend to use it to pay them.

Training goes smoothly.

The girls are naturals, it seems, understanding within a few hours how to make most of your drink offerings and work the register.

The three of you spend the afternoon in your new work aprons—black in color with Sunshine Coffee written across in pretty white detailing with little daisies underneath—and suddenly it starts to feel real.

Even if it’s a failure, even if you have to pack up and go home, it’s real and it’s yours and you’re doing this.

Spring, 1988

It starts as a…well, it starts as nothing.

In the beginning, there’s this nothingness.

Held together only by a mutual love for coffee.

Or rather, his need for coffee to get him through his shifts. You’re the supplier, really. But that’s where it starts. Humble beginnings, fleeting glances, soft exchanges. In those breathless seconds, where neither of you speaks, but silence screams.

He’s the boy with eloquent sadness, a way about him unfamiliar and curious, and you’re the girl who wants nothing more than to break down his walls.

To find out who Eddie Munson is at his core.

And maybe, just maybe, it’s best this way for things to start.

It gives things a chance to start, to grow, to thrive.

To begin…

The first weeks of the coffee shop opening are better than anything you could ever imagine. It seems like the town has been in need of a place to get away, to enjoy the company of friends and community. And it doesn’t take long before you’re adding chairs and tables both inside and out to make more room for those wishing to buy a drink or a treat and stay around.

El and Max mill about behind the register. El tending to money exchanges and Max perfecting the foam on her cappuccino for the table of boys sitting near the front of the building who just so happen to be their boyfriends. They’re trying to be subtle about it, probably to keep their interest a secret from you (their boss) but you find it endearing, seeing them glance over every so often to look fondly at them.

“Girls,” you call over to them. Two heads whip your way. “You’ve both stayed late the past two days, I’ll close up shop. Go to the movies, have fun, be teenagers. I’ve got things here.”

“Really?” El asks, looking over your shoulder to the longer haired boy to give him a shy little wave.

“Yes,” you say, tying your apron around your hips and slipping behind the counter. “Go—both of you, or else you’re both fired.”

Max snorts at that, untying her own apron from her hips and blowing a red strand of hair away from her face. Her blue eyes clash with your own as she hooks the apron on the racks you have hanging against the back wall.

“You’re sure?” she asks.

“Yes,” you tell them. “Although it looks like we’ll be needing more help sooner than I expected. If either of you know anyone looking for work, let me know. Now shoo!”

The group of teenagers rushes out the door with no further protesting, leaving you alone with the hustle and bustle of your shop.

And soon, the morning rush slows into the afternoon lull.

It’s during this time of day, you’ve noticed, the building quiets and you have time to clean up a bit around the place.

Patrons sit around in hushed conversation, writing in notebooks, or reading their books as you maneuver about the tables with a rag, wiping down surfaces until they sparkle in the setting sunlight.

It’s then that the door jingles and in walks your next customer.

He’s a vision in all black. Dark pants, dark jacket, dark Metallica shirt underneath. His hair is pulled back behind his head, strands coming to fall in curls around his face, forehead full of raven colored bangs. But it’s his face that’s striking. He’s all hard lines and sinewy bone, pale skin that accentuates the small dimple in his cheek as he regards the room upon entering. The shadow of his eyes reach yours as you rush behind the counter to serve him, and his head only tilts up just enough where you can see a scar crawling up the side of his face, and another on his neck. But it does nothing to detract from the fact he’s striking.

Beautiful, in a way you’ve not seen before.

At your gentle perusal, he tilts his head a bit, angling himself in a way where it’s hidden from view once more.

“What can I g—”

“A black coffee, two sugars. Please.”

Short.

Clipped.

No nonsense.

Your head dips swiftly and you rush over to pour him a cup from the freshest pot, fingers trembling a bit as you rip two sugar packets and pour them within, before stirring the drink with a wooden stick.

You walk back over to the counter, grin sliding across your features as you announce, “I don’t think I’ve seen you around yet. First coffee for a new customer is always free.”

He grasps the cup in his hand as you offer it to him.

There’s a brief tick in his cheek.

Not quite a smile, but not a grimace either. “Thank you…”

You tell him your name, pausing at the end to leave him room to say his.

He doesn’t, though.

His head only dips and he leaves, the door jingling on his way out.

Well, nice to meet you, too, stranger.

The man in all black comes back every day after that.

Every day at four in the afternoon.

He orders the same black coffee with two sugars and never says much more than a few words.

Good afternoon.

I’m fine.

Thank you.

Every day he seems in a rush, everyday he seems caught up in his thoughts, every day he makes you wonder what it is about him that makes him so distant from the rest of Hawkins.

You’re mid sweeping one afternoon when you decide to ask Max if she knows anything about the man who says little and regards you even less.

“You mean Eddie,” she states, wiping down a countertop.

“What’s his story?” You ask.

“It’s not really for me to say,” she admits, pausing in her cleaning. “What I can say is…two years ago some stuff happened and he was kind of…in the middle of it all. Why?”

“He’s a customer,” you tell her, resuming your sweeping. “Just trying to get to know everyone. New girl in town and all, you know?”

Over the next few weeks, you make it your mission to try to get to know your elusive customer.

You start with writing silly facts on his cups; you figure it’s lighthearted and pleasant, a great conversation starter even.

Or at least that’s your hope.

You set his cup aside a little while before he comes in, whatever fun fact is in the newspaper for the day already ready on the outside of his cup. He doesn’t react at first, and even when he starts to, you can almost tell what kind of day he’s having by his reactions.

A crocodile cannot stick its tongue out.

A twitch in his dimple.

He’s really not looking to stick around, probably has to be somewhere.

Almonds are a member of the peach family.

A soft uptick of his lip.

He spares you a few extra words that day.

Tells you to have a nice afternoon before slipping out the front door.

A dime has 118 ridges around the edge.

He finally tells you his name, even though Max told you weeks ago now.

It’s nice to hear it from him, though.

“Eddie…Eddie Munson.”

He says it slowly, as if he’s expecting some sort of response out of you.

Except it never comes.

You only smile, and that seems to calm him a bit, his shoulders slouching comfortably.

He glances down at the factoid on his cup and lets out a laugh.

The sound catches you off guard, just as his voice does most days.

It’s beautiful and your heart twists in your chest, knowing you’ve brought it out of him.

“You really think someone sat around and counted?” He asks.

“Obviously,” you tease, handing him his change. “It’s in the newspaper. Doesn’t that mean it has to be true?”

He lets out another laugh and tosses his change into your tip jar, shaking his head as he slips away and out of view.

You don’t mean to find out where he works the way you do. You’ve been steadily slipping factoids on his cups for the better part of eight weeks when you close up shop for the night and decide to go on a little walk around the neighborhood.

Spring is finally getting warmer, your thin sweater more than enough to block out the chill of the night as you slip out the front door and step out beneath one of the street lamps.

You can hear the familiar thumping coming from the Hideout, but what isn’t familiar to you is the sight of Eddie leaning against the front of the building with his leather jacket unzipped, threadbare navy tee in place, and a cigarette between his lips. You spot the flash of silver in the dangling earring in his ear, the curls that dance about his shoulders freely today.

He looks like a phantom in the night, all shadows and pale features bathed in moonlight.

“Streets aren’t safe at night,” he calls from across the short distance.

“I think I can handle my own,” you shout back, stepping further along the parking lot. “You know, those are terrible for you. My grandpa needed a quadruple bypass after all the years he smoked.”

He lets out a low whistle. “I’ll give ‘em up one day.”

“Just not today?”

“Not today,” he admits, glancing over your way. “Heading home for the night?”

“I…actually live in the shop. I have an apartment upstairs,” you tell him, crossing your hands behind your back and clasping them there.

You sway lightly on the balls of your feet, a little nervous to be standing before the man who spares you a few words on a good day.

“You got a lock?” he asks, snubbing out his cigarette on the concrete below with a dark boot.

“A chain one for now. The deadbolt doesn’t work well.”

“You need a new deadbolt then,” he tells you, not quite making eye contact. “These drunken idiots get up to who knows what when they leave here.”

You bite at your bottom lip, trying to hide your grin. He arches a brow in question, pushing up off the wall to step nearer to you. “Eddie Munson, are we becoming friends?”

“There are no other good coffee shops in town,” he says with a shrug, and if anything it makes you grin wider. “I’ll install it on the weekend if you’re around. Before my shift.”

You ask, “Here?”

He nods. “I bartend, yeah.”

“Saturday is good.”

He dips his head once, feet moving him backwards a bit toward the bar. “I have to head back. I’ll see you.” He pauses at the door and adds over his shoulder, “Tomorrow.”

“Tomorrow,” you echo.

He doesn’t smile.

Not yet.

But he waves, and something hopeful flickers in your belly.

True to his word, Eddie Munson shows up at three in the afternoon on Saturday.

El and Max wave as he enters, and you wonder if they know him more than they let on, with the way he lets them come forward to press themselves into the crook of either of his arms and they lead him toward your shoddy apartment entrance.

You tend to the front counter as Eddie works out back, showing your newest hire, Will Byers, how to perfect foam on a latte. He’s El’s step-brother, you learn very early on, and a son to Joyce who happens to be a regular. Her husband, Hopper, also comes in from time to time.

And though you were hesitant at first in hiring siblings to work together, you learn pretty quickly that Will is the quietest of the bunch, whereas it’s El and Max who tend to get a little rowdier.

“Was that good?” Will asks gently, holding the lid to the cup a few inches above the drink, closing it as you nod.

“Perfect!”

You clap excitedly, earning a smile from the boy just as Eddie comes stalking back in with the girls at his heels.

He glances at you as you approach from around the counter, the skirt about your ankles shifting as you move, his eyes dark as you hold out a coffee cup in hand.

He takes a sip and hums, the toolbag he brought with him over one shoulder shifting as he moves closer to you. “Thanks.”

“How much do I owe you for this?” You ask, not wanting to be a bother.

He was the one to offer in the first place, and yet you feel like you owe him something.

“This is fine,” he says, holding the cup up for emphasis.

“Eddie,” you start to argue softly, chewing at your lip.

The girls look on with equal expressions of interest from over his shoulders.

“This is payment enough,” he promises, tipping his head up at Will over your shoulder. “Hiring all the kids, huh?”

“They don’t seem to mind,” you say, smirking slightly to the girls. “Plus, I think I’m a fun boss.”

The girls nod in agreement, and over your shoulder Will echoes the sentiment. Eddie snorts, hooking his bag higher over his shoulder. He glances about the room one last time before he cups El over the top of her head and ruffles Max’s double braids.

“Gotta start my shift,” he announces, turning about the heel and heading to the door. He stops to turn and look at you, the shop mostly empty by now. “Thanks for the coffee.”

“Thank you for fixing my door.”

And he’s gone, out the door and crossing the parking lot to the bar across the way.

El is the first one to burst into a fit of giggles, and soon Max follows. Will urges the girls to keep their composure, but you suddenly have three teens laughing at you—or at least you assume they’re laughing at you, because their dark haired friend is long gone now.

You whirl on them all, feeling heat bloom beneath your skin. “What?”

Your response is their giggling, each kid one by one resuming their job tasks.

Will to his lattes, El to the register, and Max back to cleaning the shop.

You never find out what’s so hilarious.

You decide to switch things up in the weeks that follow, as the month of May starts to bleed into June.

The weather starts to rise and the people of Hawkins start to wear less layers.

Except for Eddie.

Eddie’s always wearing his leather jacket.

Always.

On those days, when Eddie’s storm cloud over his head seems a little extra heavy, you swap his cup with a grinning factoid on it with one that has a corny joke written across instead.

What do you call a pig that does karate? A pork chop.

He’s…well, he’s not impressed with that one. Only offers you a pitying hum before he marches off and heads to the Hideout.

Why did the golfer bring two pairs of pants? In case he got a hole in one.

You think you catch the slightest curl of his lips.

Maybe you imagine it, but it makes you feel warm and giddy inside long after he’s gone, humming a Beatles song as you wipe down tables.

What did the policeman say to his belly button? You’re under a vest.

That one makes him glower.

Actually glower.

But you know it’s only half-hearted, because he says, “This one was ridiculous and even you know it.”

“I’m trying!” you whine the words and he chuckles, humming as he slips out the front door, chime dangling as he goes.

Why do seagulls fly over the sea? If they flew over the bay, they would be bagels.

He’s not happy with that one. But you can also tell he’s not happy in general.

A group of people around a table had looked at him as he entered that afternoon, whispering amongst themselves.

In the months you’ve been at Hawkins, you can tell there’s an affinity for gossip here.

But Eddie?

He’s always to himself, never says much more than he needs to, makes himself seem smaller whenever possible.

You can’t imagine what anyone might have to say about him.

But you hand him his coffee all the same and don’t miss the way he tucks his hair over the scars along his neck and face as he walks back out.

Why are there gates around cemeteries? Because people are dying to get in.

Something happens that day.

It takes your breath away.

Eddie laughs, a genuine, joyous laugh.

And what’s even better? It’s paired with a smile.

The first you’ve seen on his face, and it’s absolutely beautiful.

Lightning slashes across the sky and you know it’s only a matter of time before you hear the resounding boom that fills the air.

It sends you shooting up in bed, heart hammering away in your still unfamiliar apartment, moving across your bed to try and flick your bedside lamp on.

Only nothing changes, and you’re still left in darkness.

Power outage.

Your heart kicks up at the dread curling in your chest as you try and navigate about the room. Thankfully you can see light seeping in through your bedroom window. The familiar glow from the Hideout sign catches your eye.

You open your blinds enough to let some of the light in and move about the room to pull on a pair of jeans and some shoes, and then rush over to grab your backpack and raincoat hanging from your closet.

The distance between your shop and the Hideout seems daunting with it downpouring as it is, feet barreling beneath you as you rush across the parking lot and shove the door open.

Hawkins is a small town, you know this, but you realize just how small when everyone in the room whirls around and you recognize them as regulars of the shop.

And just as you recognize them, they recognize you.

You figure very quickly you have three options: rush to the bar and seat near the currently busy Eddie who is making a drink for an eager patron; try to sit with some of your regulars and mingle for a bit; or pick the furthest corner of the bar to hang out in and keep to yourself.

Keeping to yourself rules out, your sleep deprived state carrying you over to the furthest seat, which happens to be a little booth in a corner, away from prying eyes.

You intend to read.

Really, you do.

Pull out the book from your backpack and everything, open to the page where you left off, but the hum of the music from the jukebox in the corner has your eyes fluttering. The mingling of customers as they talk about their weeks, the shuffle of feet against hardwood floors, the tinkling of glasses as groups toast to life has you propping your head up with your hand. You glance over to Eddie and catch his gaze briefly, his hair moving about his face as he works, talking with one of his customers, all stoic and hard like stone.

You remember his smile and you smile.

Your eyes scan the words on your current page but they start to blur. The room dissolves around you. And finally, with the sound of thunder faraway in your mind, you drift off into sleep.

“We close at three in the morning,” a voice says.

“What time is it?” You groan against your book, face pressing into the cover, eyes bleary.

He's walking toward you when you rouse, slow movements and long limbs. Light on his feet in a way that seems otherworldly, but makes sense for him.

“Three ten? Fifteen?”

Even in your sleepy state you know who it is right away.

Dark hair, pale skin, chocolate brown eyes.

Eddie.

His body slides into the vinyl booth across from you, a towel strewn over his shoulder, hair pulled back in another one of his signature ponytails.

You blink twice, wondering if he’s about to disappear, but his image only solidifies further the more you come to. “I didn’t mean to fall asleep. I’m sorry—seriously. You can kick me out. I'm sure you want to get out of here and I’ve kept you late. I…my power went out and I saw your lights were still on over here so I walked over and I—”

You sound tired and it’s a little pitiful on your ears. The new girl who can’t even sleep in her own apartment because of a little storm. You curse under your breath, hoarseness lingering as you utter another ‘sorry’ under your breath.

“Breathe,” he says, sliding a glass of water across the table. “Drink. Slow sips; don’t want you choking on me.”

You lift the glass and take a slow sip. That sandpaper feeling gnawing in the back of your throat lessens. “Sorry…again.”

“It’s fine,” he says, and the silence between you lingers.

You’re not used to this. This quiet that breathes and settles into the atmosphere around you. And yet, you’re not sure how to fill those spaces.

Eddie only leans back in the seat, one ankle hooked over his knee, a forearm across the table.

“I…uh, don’t like storms,” you admit softly, sliding your cup around the table in a circle, settling on trying to get something out of him beyond your normal short responses you’re used to. “The dark either. Not really. So when my power went out, I just didn’t want to, uh, be alone.”

He’s silent again for a while. Reaches across the table to thumb at the condensation on your glass. It feels familiar, and yet it’s not. You’re still mostly strangers. Two people who live in the same vicinity as one another, and yet you’re not friends.

Not yet.

You can see the twitch in his fingers, the tapping of them along the surface, rings on his fingers glinting in the light.

You’ve noticed them before, sure, but never like this.

Never so close.

He swallows and you catch the bob of his throat. The shift of his silver chains around his neck. “I don’t like the dark either.”

His voice is so soft, eyes focusing on a rivulet dripping from your glass. He’s not looking at you, and that’s okay, because you’re still shaken by the sudden vulnerability of the admission.

I don’t like the dark, either.

You can’t quite mask your disbelief. Him of all people, afraid of the dark, catches you off guard. “Really?” Your voice wavers at the end.

He finally looks up at you, and his eyes are softer than you’ve ever seen them. “Yeah. Haven’t for—well, for a while now,” he says quietly, slowly. He drags a hand along the back of his neck, rubbing lightly. “Kind of why I work here. By the time I get home there’s only a couple hours till sunrise.”

You sense his hesitance at sharing that. The way he shifts ever so subtly against the vinyl, glancing back away from your gaze. You soften, heart warming at the fact he chose this moment to open up, even if only slightly. Your thumb grazes the side of your glass, eyes intent on a droplet that cascades down the side, and you force a sly grin across your lips.

“It’s why you’re a secret coffee fiend too.”

He huffs out a laugh at that, sides shaking from the effort. “I don’t really think it’s a secret.”

You swallow, throat a little dry as you softly ask, “Hey, Eddie?”

It’s a gamble and you fear you might push him too far too soon, but the question rests in your mind all the same. Has been for some weeks now. This wonder as to where Eddie goes when all of Hawkins goes to sleep at night. Why you’ve never seen him elsewhere, except for the four walls of your shop and now this bar.

“Hmm?”

Your fingers toy with your napkin sitting beneath your glass of water. A corner rips away and you ball it up between your fingers, letting it soak in the slickness of the table from your melted ice. “Where is…home? I never really see you around town, except for when you stop by the shop.”

“It’s in the next town over. I like the…privacy.” He sounds faraway, even though he’s sitting right across from you.

You understand what he means. Since moving in, you feel like you’ve been thrust into a world where you’re constantly under a microscope. People want to know at all times what the ‘new girl’ is up to. You’re used to all the gossip. The hush of whispers on the streets, the questions of what you’ve been up to, if you’re seeing anyone, what a young girl is doing moving into a town like theirs. And while most people are accepting and kind, you can’t help but to feel like they’re simultaneously picking you apart or waiting for you to fail.

“Hawkins is small, so I understand that. I unwillingly know everyone’s drama.”

You notice he’s started to fidget with his hands. Pale fingers curl around those silver rings adoring his knuckles and begin to twist, metal jangling against metal. “Everyone?”

There’s an innate urge to reach across the table and soothe him. To brush your fingers against the back of his hand, remind him that you’re there to talk and nothing more. To be a friend to him, in whatever capacity he allows.

It’s clear that there’s trepidation there over your words. Fear, unbidden.

You shake your head rapidly, wishing to urge away his worries. “Not yours, if that’s what you’re worried about. Believe it or not, you’re a tough one to crack.” You let out an uneasy chuckle, and add, “but I think I’m starting to.”

“Think so?” His brows perk up at that, body shifting to lean forward on his elbows. From this angle you can see every detail of his face, the span of his lashes, the way his bangs tickle his forehead and those shorter curls brush the highest point of his cheeks.

“Yeah,” you say, leaning forward onto your elbows. You drop your voice into a whisper, like you’re about to share the deepest of secrets and mutter, “you prefer corny jokes to facts, for one. You laugh more at them.”

He’s, well, he’s magnetic like this. You’re not sure he even sees it. This quality of curiosity that brims when he’s near, to know, to learn about him. “That’s because they’re so awful I have to. I don’t want to hurt your feelings, you know?”

Mirth bubbles in your gut at his words. “You actually love the kids that work for me.”

“They’re…they’re good kids.” He says it looking off into the distance a little.

You imagine he’s thinking of El, Will and Max. You drift off all the same, thinking of them with their glowing kindness and effervescent personalities. Each one a bright spot in your life and valuable both to your business and personally as the children that brighten your days.

“You like black coffee with two sugars. Fitting. Tells me a lot about you.” It’s said brightly, practically giddy as your elbows press further into the tabletop.

“Yeah? Like what?”

“You like a little sweetness in your life.”

He guffaws. Head drops back as he shakes with it. You pout as he meets your gaze, his voice light as he opens his mouth to speak. “That was about as bad as your corny jokes,” he tells you. “Plus I gave you that one for free. Doesn’t count.”

“That's all I’ve got so far from you.” You slide the glass closer to your form, fingers circling around the base. “but I’m patient.”

He’s suddenly very interested in the clock resting over your shoulder. You know it’s there when you follow the line of his sight and see it there, his dark eyes flickering between that and you, and then the bar on the far side of the room. His fingers drift up to the towel over his shoulder, curling around the edge as he slides it down and holds it within his palm.

“I…should really close up the place. I’ll drive you home. Just give me a few, okay?” He’s already standing. Long limbs slide out of the side of the booth, his earring glinting in the moonlight drifting in from the open windows.

You immediately feel a burning in your gut at the thought of inconveniencing someone you barely know, hands coming up in front of you as you urge, “You don’t have to. It’s a short walk.”

His response is a hard stare and a monotone, “It’s pouring.”

“Okay, if you insist.” You force an uncertain smile onto your face, pushing your glass away from your form to let it rest in the center of the table.

He’s already walking behind the bar when he says, “I insist.”

You sit in silence as he works. He’s diligent and swift about it, moving in and out of tables and chairs, making sure every inch of the building is spick and span. You remain with your head in your hand, elbow on the table, simply watching him. You try to remain inconspicuous about it, not wanting to linger too long on his features. And yet there’s the part of you that cannot look away from him. That magnetic quality sparking something unfamiliar in your gut; this pull to figure out his secrets, crack the code to what makes him him.

You notice he hums as he works, a tune you vaguely recognize spilling through pursed lips, his lithe arms shifting as he does.

He watches you, too, you notice after a while.

Dark eyes haunting and imploring, drifting to your frame every so often.

You wonder what he’s thinking.

You wonder how he sees you—if he looks at you with as much curiosity as you do him.

And then he’s reaching for his wallet and keys from a lock box kept in a secret space behind the bar, fingers jingling as he holds the silver metal aloft before him.

You rush over to him when he waves you over, moving to go stand at his side as the two of you slip from the building doors and he locks up behind you. He leads you to a van in silence and opens the passenger side door as you walk around the vehicle. There’s a brief moment of touch as he extends a hand to you and you climb inside, trying to move quickly to avoid being soaked to the bone once more. Eddie drapes a hand over his head and rushes around the other side, clambering in with a loud huff and slamming the door shut beside him.

His head shakes as he enters, the audible jingle of metal in his ear echoing in the space as water droplets flick from the moist ends of his hair. You toy with the edge of your sweatshirt awkwardly, uncertain of where to look. Where to focus as he turns the radio on and metal music blares out. Catching your sudden jolt, his fingers move to lower the knob, eyes meeting yours in the dark of the moonlight. The music settles into a quiet hum, lyrics swirling around in your mind as he regards you carefully.

There’s a beat of silence, and then he says, “You know, you can come to the Hideout after your shop closes. I might not be able to talk much, but…well, it’s there.”

It’s an invitation.

An opening.

A welcome to his world.

You don’t miss that; you don’t miss the clear implication of his words. The fact he doesn’t mind you being in his space, being near him, spending time within his company.

But you can sense his nervousness. The way he shifts in his seat and curls his palm around the steering wheel, hands a little shaky as he lets out a slow exhale. Trying to ease the tension, you turn in your seat and glance up at him through your lashes, passing him your kindest of smiles.

“Across the parking lot from me,” you say, a little uneasily, a little nervousness brimming at the surface.

You’re only feet away from one another on a good day.

A thirty second walk, if you were to time it.

“Yup,” he says, turning his eyes onto the building in front of him as he puts the key into the ignition and starts the car.

It’s a short drive.

The shortest really.

He turns around in a giant circle and ends up in front of your building, car jerking lightly as he puts it into park and pulls the key from the ignition. Your hands slide across the fabric against your thighs, throat burning as you look across the space between the two of you and see him regarding you carefully like he expects you to flit away into the wind. Like he expects to blink and your appearance will disappear from his mind, there one moment and gone the next like an apparition.

You gather your things in your hand and reach for the door handle.

“Well, thank you for keeping me company tonight and for driving me home,” you say, opening the side door.

“Not a problem at all.” His voice is quiet.

But he gives you one of those smiles, and that brings an unthinkable joy to your heart.

“Goodnight, Eddie.”

“Goodnight.”

It really starts with trips after work.

They’re quiet and tentative.

Nothing more than glances over the top of your glass of wine or whatever you choose for the night as you sit near the bar.

Eddie hadn’t lied when he said he might not be able to talk much. He’s typically occupied for a majority of his shift, and when he’s not he’s cleaning or trying to maintain the place.

Even when you can catch up to talk, it’s brief conversation there and there about the day to day.

His remarks about whatever fact or joke you put on his cup that day, talks about the weather, how your day was.

But you find you enjoy it, and soon enough routine takes place: everyday you open up for your shift, stay till close and help the kids clean up, and then rush across the parking lot to share space with your work neighbor.

So yes, it starts as strangers, but it’s grown into this.

Into this something.

You find that you like it.

“So what’s your story?” It’s Chance Muller who asks you.

Chance with his dark hair and brown eyes.

Chance with his muscular stature, honed by years of sports in school and maintenance thereafter.

He’s pretty, in this almost too perfect kind of way.

And he likes you; that much is obvious very early on, simply because he’s been coming every time he has the early shift at work just to see you before getting in his cop car.

He’s nice and he makes you smile.

But he’s not Eddie.

It’s an acceptance that came crashing earlier that morning, just days after your encounter with him at the Hideout.

Your curiosity for the dark haired metalhead has become an undeniable attraction.

A crush.

Something that feels so silly as an adult, and yet it’s your reality all the same.

“What do you mean?”

You snap yourself from your thoughts, remembering that Chance is there in his tan uniform, hands on his hips as you walk about the mostly empty coffee shop.

It’s still early.

Barely minutes after opening your doors for the day. Most people don’t come until the morning rush that starts around seven in the morning.

It’s five now.

He steps closer to you, his cup of coffee against the table he’s set it on.

Broad shoulders fill the empty spaces in the room, the outline of his arms visible even in the long sleeves of his uniform.

He’s broader and bigger than Eddie, you think.

Eddie, who is all lithe and less hardened. He reminds you of the way elves are described in his favorite books he’s recently lent you to read.

“You’re the new girl in town. From what I’ve heard, everyone loves you. But you’re still single—what gives?” He leans his elbows against the countertop, dark eyes swooping up to meet yours.

You don’t feel the gentle kick up of your heart, nor the rustle of butterflies in your belly.

“Chance…” Your chest burns at his insinuation, shifting awkwardly on the balls of your feet.

“I’m serious.”

“I don’t know,” you shrug, whirling back around to face him. “I guess I just haven’t met the right one.”

It’s been a while since your last relationship, and even then it hadn’t been anything serious.

You’ve always been moving, always on the go, trying new things and never lingering in one place for long enough to try.

You know what he’s about to ask you even before he gets a chance to say it.

And yet your stomach tumbles as he says, “I was thinking…if you’re up for it, we could grab dinner then?”

You let out a nervous laugh. “Chance.”

“Come on now.”

“I have my employees and my business to look after. It’s still so new, I don’t really think I can take time off.”

It’s not a lie, but you know it’s not the best excuse, either.

You haven’t really taken any time for yourself, no; with the business, you’re constantly working on trying new things, making sure your money is on track, payroll is upkept.

And then there’s the cost of supplies and the repairs here and there that you’ve needed done.

“Would you at least think about it?” His eyes are soft and your resolve dissolves a bit, recognizing that it is only one date.

It doesn’t automatically mean there will be more.

It’s an opportunity to try, however.

“You’re my customer.”

His fingers trail along the petals of the flowers you’ve set up in front of the cash register. Pretty, in a bright arrangement of purples, pinks and greens. “Pretty sure everyone in Hawkins is one of your customers.”

“Fine, I'll think about it.” You offer him an easy smile.

He begins walking backwards toward the door, keys in his palm jangling as he grins at you widely and says, “Just two adults out for dinner. Doesn’t have to be anything crazy, just us getting to know each other. Everyone in town knows of you, but I get the feeling that no one really knows you knows you. Was thinking we could change that.”

“I bet you use that one on all the ladies. I told you I’ll think about it,” you reply. “Don't you have to get to work? Writing traffic tickets and all that fun stuff.”

His hand is around the door when he tips his head up and raises a hand to wave. “I’ll see you around, okay?”

“Bye, Chance.”

Eddie’s head perks up as you come barreling in the front door to the Hideout. It’s a quieter night, as Mondays always are, and he barely has a moment to blink before you’re hopping up onto one of the barstools across from him and tapping your fingers along the tin you cradle close to your body.

He eyes it wearily, tucking some bills away in a cash register.

“I need your opinion,” you say, sliding the tin closer to him.

“What’s up?” He crosses the distance between you two, ringed fingers tapping along the counter.

He’s wearing red today beneath his jacket and you’re pretty sure it’s your favorite color you’ve seen on him yet.

“Try these,” you tell him, not failing to catch the slight wince he makes, “don’t make that face, they’re not poisoned.”

He moves to lift one of the foil corners, glancing in hesitantly with his head tilted back a bit. It’s as if he expects something to jump out at him. “What’s wrong with them then?”

“I can’t make you cookies and expect you to eat them?”

“I don’t want pity cookies.” He shoves them back your way, though there’s no malice in the smile that adorns his lips.

“They are not pity cookies. They’re ��I'm-trying-a-new-recipe-for-my-shop-and-need-an-unbiased-opinion-cookies.’” You push them closer to him once more. “You’ll tell me they’re crap if they’re crap.”

“How do you know?”

You fix him with a blank stare. “You laugh at my jokes because you hate them, not because they’re funny. Need I say more?”

He doesn’t, because despite his bumbling, there’s one thing you’ve learned about Eddie in these past months: the way to his heart is through his stomach.

The man loves sugar.

You figured as much with his coffee order, and have brought him extra treats from the shop here and there whenever you can.

So it comes as no shock to you when he takes a bite of the cookie and turns away from you to hide the way his dimples immediately pop as a smile blooms across his cheeks. “Oh…oh.”

“Good?”

“Mm.” It’s a hum around a mouthful of food as he puts the rest of the cookie in his mouth.

Yet he’s still not given his answer. Nervousness wells and bubbles.

“Eddie, if they’re garbage tell me they’re garbage. I won’t cry.”

“You cried last week at The Hobbit,” he points out.

“That’s because you didn’t warn me that everyone dies. I walked in blind. Blind.”

“Yeah, but you loved it. You asked me to keep my copy after you finished.”

You had.

And he’s right, because you did love it. You loved even more he’d felt comfortable enough to share something so special to him with you.

“I’m still upset you said no.”

“I’ve had that thing for ages. I’ll never give it away. Just admit you loved it. It’s okay to be wrong about things sometimes.” He’s enjoying himself. You want to wipe the smug look clean from his face.

“All I said was I like books that have love in them.”

“I’d say The Hobbit has love. Maybe not romantic love, but there’s love there.”

“True. Although I’m stuck on Tom Bombadil in The Fellowship of the Ring.”

“I thought you’d enjoy him, seeing as you’re Miss Sunshine around town. It’s what everyone says, at least.”

“And what about you?” you ask. “What do you say?”

“I’m not sure yet.”

“You’ve known me for almost three months now. Here I thought we were friends.”

“Are we?” He tips his head to the side.

“Yeah, I think so.”

“I don’t have many of those these days.” He winces at that.

“Well, I have one of those these days.”

His eyes narrow, disbelieving. “That’s bull.”

“Everyone knows me in town, sure, but they don’t know me.”

“Sometimes that’s best,” he admits quietly. “Sometimes that’s safer.”

“Is that how it is for you?”

Him keeping people at arm's length at all times.

Him only going out in the later hours of the day, staying up late into the night.

Him never opening up beyond a certain point, cards always close to his chest.

He goes quiet at your words, and you worry you’ve offended him.

“The cookies are great,” he finally says.

Conversation over.

“I’ll make you more tomorrow.”

“I’d like that.”

There’s another pause.

You can’t hide the fear of his upset, your mouth curling downward.

His eyes slide across your face, and he reaches over to grab another cookie.

A peace offering.

“And for the record, I think we can be friends,” he says.

It really begins as friends.

#eddie munson x you #eddie munson x reader smut #eddie munson fanfic #Eddie munson post s4 #Eddie munson fluff #Eddie munson imagine #Eddie munson fanfiction #Eddie Munson x reader #eddie munson x afab!reader

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balkanradfem · 22 days ago

Text

Health update

I've been writing this post over and over during the last six months, and ultimately I would decide not to publish it, because I didn't have a good resolution for it! I wanted to come here and write – hey I solved it! I've fixed it! Good ending to the story. But instead it's just been crazy time and actually, I'm not in a great place. I don't expect to get any help or advice – at this point I'm convinced that nobody can help me, but, if you wanna hear my crazy infuriating story about the neck pain, click on 'Keep reading'.

So if you've been following me for a while, you'll remember I mentioned some intense pain in my neck, left arm, and left shoulder, that would stop me from walking, sitting, standing, lifting anything heavy. All I could do was lie down, and get around by bike. It happened after I was carrying heavy bags of chestnuts every day, two years ago, and I just didn't realize it could do me any harm, but I was wrong about that.

I've managed to get a MRI after a full year of waiting, and not being able to walk for more than 15 minutes, and the documents said that nothing was wrong with my neck! I was fine, and my doctor and everyone else decided the pain was psychosomatic and I needed to go to a psychiatrist. But I knew that wasn't it! I've been struggling with psychosomatic pain for 10 years at this point and that's not how it works.

My doctor has been giving me vitamins and telling me it's a vitamin D deficiency, and not knowing what else to do, I humored her and took vitamins. I've been trying all kinds of exercises I would find online, which were all extremely painful for me to do, and took days of recovery, until finally, one exercise worked and moved the pain away from my neck. It was now in my head, so if I tried to walk, or sit, or lean back while sitting down – my head would experience waves of pain. If I persisted, then I would end up in bed, paralyzed in pain for days. But I could now lift stuff with my right arm, and I was so relieved to be even a little bit better, not having that constant pain in my neck was a blessing. When I told this to my doctor, she decided that 'pain went away on its own', which I tried to debate but she didn't listen.

Afterwards I tried going to a private physiotherapist, to see if I could get at least any more information, and I was scheduled for a treatment of massage, electrotherapy, ultrasound therapy and traction. When they did traction, I felt something move directly in the place where the pain was, I was shocked! Next few days I could actually sit normally, and I thought I was saved – but then I made one wrong move with my left arm, and the pain came right back, devastating me. I went again, thinking maybe the second time will fix me, and asked about what traction usually solves – I was told it was a nerve impingement. But the doctors said I didn't have it, because it didn't show up on scans, and I didn't have pins and needles in my fingers.

However I did suspect I still somehow had an impinged nerve. My second attempt at physiotherapy did not work, but I now had more information – traction on my neck definitely helped the first time. The exercise that helped my neck previously, was also traction! Traction is basically stretching out your body in a way that your head, or one of your limbs is being pulled away from the body. And I wanted to try it on my left arm, which was at that point, almost completely unusable; not only it was so weak it couldn't pull a power cord out of an outlet, but it would hurt severely if I tried to lift even a bowl. I found instructions online on how to do traction on my shoulder at home, did it DIY style, and – my left arm gained power back. It was still painful to lift heavier things, it was still not 100% usable, but I could lift a bowl and pull out a cord with it. 60% of its problems were resolved, in about 10 minutes. I was both relieved and angry. To think something so simple could resolve so many symptoms and nobody even thought to mention it for me to try? It was devastating. At that point my left arm was unusable for a year and a half.

Another thing happened after I freed my left arm – I started experiencing extreme pins and needles, not only in my fingertips, but even at the top of my head. I now had all symptoms of nerve impingement. I realized later, that I had pins and needles the entire time, but failed to register or notice, because I had them for the last 10 year because my blood pressure is so low, all of my limbs are numb at all times. I thought some base level of pins and needles is normal and didn't think to report it as a symptom.

So with this new knowledge, I went to my doctor and explained that I could still have an impinged nerve, but nobody caught it because I failed to report the tingles, because I thought they were normal, and nobody asked me about blood pressure. I still couldn't walk, or sit, or stand or carry heavy stuff. So she redirected me to a private physician who dealt specifically with nerve impingement, he was expensive but he could fix it.

So I went.

The guy didn't want to hear me out, but immediately asked for the MRI, which I gave to him dejectedly, because I was told they show nothing. He looked at it for 2 minutes and located the impinged nerve. It was between my 6th and 7th vertebrae, trapped inside of my spine. He showed me on a toy how the nerve gets compressed every time I sit, stand, walk, or lift anything heavy, and how any of these motions would send horrible waves of pain trough my body.

I was blank with shock. There was clear evidence of nerve impingement on my MRI scans, but the documents said everything was alright? I asked why didn't the doctors at the hospital catch this, and he said they just don't look at it in such detail. He reassured me he has a painless therapy that can resolve this issue in a few weeks and that I don't have to be worried about it. It was expensive but I had been at this point, saving money and desperate to the point of being willing to give up my savings just to get free of pain – the pain was destroying my will to live.

I'm going to warn you that this is where things will take a bad turn, and just writing this down makes me mad.

The therapy was not painless. It was electric therapy first, then I would be put on a machine that pulls my head away from my body, but at an angle that was extremely painful to me. Then they would put me to lie with my head pushed forward, another angle that hurt me so much I was slowly starting to sob while it was happening. At one point I nervously said I had a question, and was immediately shut down with 'you can ask later', by that same guy. I was told it would hurt for the next few days but then it would get better. I'm used to pain but I had to take pain medicine as soon as I got home. It was unbearable.

After the second therapy, the pain got worse to the point where I was completely bed-bound. I was struggling to do my job, had to take breaks to lie down on the floor every half an hour. The pain was worse than it was in the start – my neck hurt again, I couldn't use my left arm, I even developed new symptoms of pain while walking, pain I've never experienced before! Feeling panicked and worried, I called them to report my awful condition, because they had a rule that if you don't come to therapy, and you don't cancel it the day before, you have to pay as if it happened. So I called, and I told them my symptoms were getting much worse, asking if I should still come to therapy as scheduled, thinking we would maybe try something else since this didn't work?

And I got told... god I need to calm down, this is still insane to me. I got told 'okay don't come anymore'. And that was it. They were like 'we can't help you anymore don't come bye'. I remember just pure panic and dread hearing that, I understood they were getting rid of me because the therapy didn't work. In desperation, I later called again and asked if I could schedule another appointment because I was in so much pain, and they said 'in 6 weeks, and then you can only have another every 6 weeks and no sooner'.

I thought at first, okay, I'll wait for 6 weeks. I need help. But two weeks later I realized there's no use. The therapy put me in a state much worse than initial, how could I go back for more of that? And these people were completely apathetic. I lost all of that money, only to have my state worsen to the point where I would start crying from how much it hurt. I was breaking down.

Eventually I came to my limit of how much I can endure and I decided to go forward with a back-burner plan I had devised in my head, but didn't go trough with before, because it was a little insane. I knew now how the traction machine worked, and I knew that traction in the past, would help me, and this one didn't because the head-forward angle was just catastrophic. So I decided to diy it. Make my own contraception that would do the exact thing but at an angle I felt comfortable with. Is that smart? Is it not experimenting on myself when I'm already in such horrible state? Well. That's what it is. But at least I won't do as horrid of a job as those 'private professionals' who did this to me.

So! The pain is not resolved. My own efforts are ongoing, it's kinda painful, I'm hacking it, trying to figure out the correct intensity, angle, and all other stuff, trying not to think about how insane I feel trying to diy something as serious as this, but listen. I need hope. I have nobody left who could help me. Doing nothing is sending me spiraling. I need to be trying stuff out, and everything that has helped me to this point, have been my little diy, learned-from-internet tricks. Maybe it will work, maybe I'll learn something. But I need hope. I know the healthcare system cannot help me because they documented there's nothing wrong with me and I can't disprove it. And I am so sad.

I had to give up all of my hobbies, my crafts, I couldn't go on with weaving or knitting, I barely did any sewing, gardening became painful and I can only do it in small increments. If I don't resolve this, I won't be able to live my life, I won't be able to build anything. All my dreams will fail.

Oh and if you're wondering how was I still able to forage in the forest if I can't walk – I hacked it. I can walk for 10 minutes, but then I have to lie down. And in a forest, I just can lie down anywhere. So I would walk for 10 minutes, then lie on the forest ground, just look at the trees and the birds for 10 minutes, so pain would go away and I'd be able to walk a little again! And forest has soft mossy composted leaves ground that didn't trigger the pain so badly, if the impact of walking is gentle, then I can walk a little bit longer.

I stopped talking about this issue because the mere thought of it can make me hopeless and depressed, I was avoiding thinking about it, or talking about it, to not make myself upset. I sometimes managed to forget about just endlessly playing stardew valley and pretending things are fine. And I thought it would get resolved by now, I was so hopeful that the therapy would help. I had all of my knitting supplies ready, I had collected some new dandelion stems to make baskets of, I was so excited. But I'll just have to hold off on everything, hopefully not indefinitely. Isn't it crazy that I've now had a nerve trapped inside of my spine, sending pain trough my body for 2 years? And I only found out in the last 4 weeks but then it was immediately made worse? Insane stuff. Life isn't supposed to be like this. I don't think anyone was meant to deal with crazy stuff like that.

#neck pain #nerve impingement #health issues #being a woman needing healthcare #having to be my own doctor #depressing post #I don't want to make anyone worried or sad #i'll fix this somehow #and then for the rest of my life i'll know how to fix this #and the knowledge i gain will make sure this never happens to me again #and i'm never left alone in pain for so long

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