#and part of me is worried about the future

[c4llezz]

NOW THAT WE'VE MET AGAIN

synopsis: sophia’s been acting strange lately, and the katseye girls are determined to find out who’s been stealing all their leader’s time.

TW: drinking

genre: fluff

word count: 3.3k this is part 2 of if we ever meet again. check it out first!

not proofread, so expect mistakes.

impulsively you had bought a ticket to los angeles, with the only goal of finding sophia again.

the problem was that you had no way of contacting her. i mean, you had dm’d her on instagram, but after a week of not receiving any response, you decided you were not going to humiliate yourself and deleted the message.

now your only hope was to run into her on the street like all those times before. it had to be easy, right? the universe seemed to be in your favor every time you were in the same city.

it wasn’t.

for some reason, the universe did not want to cooperate with you anymore. and for the two months you’d been living in the city, you had never encountered the idol.

living in la was expensive, and the two jobs you were working on were barely enough to sustain you. note for future self: don’t buy tickets to one of the most expensive cities in the world to look for a pretty, talented girl.

anyway, you can’t go back in time to warn your past self to save more money and apply for a better job beforehand.

so here you were, one in the morning, serving strangers drink after drink, listening to problems you were definitely not interested in, and watching people your age have the time of their lives dancing with no worries about their future hangover.

while you were making small talk with your coworker, someone walked to the counter. “hey, what can i get you?” you asked. the woman in front of you looked quite familiar, curly hair braided in a ponytail, sharp straight eyebrows, and an intense gaze that was inviting but intimidating all at once.

she was clearly on the tipsy side, her eyelids moving more slowly than normal when she blinked at you. “you are new here,” she said, not as a question but rather a statement. “i come here frequently and i haven’t seen you before.”

you shrugged “i’ve been here for a few months now, maybe you casually come on the days i don’t work”

“yeah probably.” she said “well, cute new bartender, can i get a shot of… whatever you want?”

you frowned, glancing around to see if maybe you could spot someone who might look like a friend of the girl. you noticed a few people looking her way, but none looked like a concerned friend, more like they were waiting to shoot their shot. “are you here with your friends?”

“i was,” she started, “but they had to leave. i already called someone to pick me up.”

as if on cue, her phone started ringing, and she answered the call. you obviously could not hear the other end of the line, but for the answers of the drunk girl, you figured the person who was picking her up had arrived and was waiting outside.

when she hung up, she sighed, disappointed, “i have to go. but you owe me a drink, and don't think i’m going to forget.”

you chuckled, looking at your watch, “my shift just ended. i could walk you to the door, i don’t think is safe for you to walk all the way there alone.”

she accepted your offer and waited for you to grab your things.

when you exited the club, you saw a bright red mustang parked just a couple feet away. damn. a woman was leaning on the driver's door, while another stood closer to your workplace. both were wearing caps and face masks, so you couldn’t see their faces (not that there was too much light on the street either).

the one closer to you approached quickly, “manon, come on!”

even behind the mask and hat, you could recognize those eyes anywhere.

that’s why manon had looked so familiar, she was part of the group sophia was in. and after you had done a little research, you learned a little bit about the group, and more about the girl you had met three — now four — times already.

“sophia! meet my new friend, isn't she hot? she has a skateboard too, look!”

sophia finally looked at the woman next to her friend. she planned on apologizing for any disturbance the older girl might have caused, but when she locked eyes with you, the words died on her tongue.

after a few seconds, and manon going to some nearby bushes to throw up, she finally got out of her daze. “oh lord” she sighed, looking at where the swizz girl had gone, the driver girl now rubbing circles on her back.

you cleared your throat catching the attention of the black haired girl. “i’ve been waiting for you to appear where i work magically.”

she giggled, “i tend to do that. although it is always an accident.”

when you exited the club, you saw a bright red mustang parked just a couple feet away, damn. a woman was leaning on the driver's door while another one was closer to the door of your work place, both of them were wearing caps and face mask so you couldn’t see their faces (not that there was too much light on the street either). the one closer to you approached quickly, “manon, come on!”

even behind the mask and hat, you could recognise those eyes anywhere.

that’s why manon had looked so familiar, she was part of the group sophia was in. and after you had done a little research, you learned a little bit about the group, and more about the girl you had met three, now four, times already.

“sophia! meet my new friend, isn't she hot?. she has a skateboard too, look!”

sophia finally looked at the woman next to her friend. she planned on apologizing for any disturbance the older girl might have caused, but when she locked eyes with you, the words died on her tongue.

after a few seconds, and manon going to some near bushes to throw up, she finally got out of her daze. “oh lord” she sighed, looking at where the swizz girl had gone, the driver now rubbing circles on her back.

you cleared your throat, gaining the attention of the black haired girl, “i’ve been waiting for you to magically appear where i work.”

she giggled, “i tend to do that. although it is always an accident.”

“accident or not, it’s always nice to talk to you.” then you added, “don’t think i didn’t notice when you took my wallet out of my jacket pocket last time.”

“damn it. i thought i had been subtle with it!”

there was a honk, and you both looked at the car where manon was sitting with her head resting against the window, probably asleep.

“i need to go. thanks for taking care of her, by the way.”

you saw her get into the passenger seat. and when the mustang took off, you placed your skateboard on the street and pushed off behind it. sophia watched you from the side view mirror.

“why were you talking to that girl for so long?” daniela asked while driving.

the filipina answered casually, “i was just thanking her for taking care of manon.”

the dancer seemed satisfied with her answer, and if she wasn’t, she didn't say anything else, which was nice. after all, sophia could now think about you without any distractions.

now that sophia knew where you worked, she planned to visit you, casually. normally she wouldn’t go out on nights when she knew she had early rehearsals, but she couldn’t wait any longer to see you. so she made a stupid excuse and left the house before anyone could question her.

when she arrived at the club and saw the crowd outside, she seriously considered going back and getting under her covers to get a full night of peaceful sleep. she shook her head, she was already here.

after getting inside and navigating around the sweaty bodies, she reached the bar. where she knew you would be.

manon, even though she had a massive headache, told her you were a new bartender at the place she often visited on friday nights. sophia figured your shift would be on the same night they had gone to pick up the oldest of the group.

she was proven right as soon as she took a seat at the counter and saw you nodding at something a woman sitting a few chairs aways said, with a smile that looked more like a grimace. sophia watched as the blonde woman leaned her head on her hand and said something that Sophia couldn’t hear, but she did notice your eyes go wide. even with the flashing lights around her, she noticed a red tint appear on your cheeks.

another bartender came up to the filipina, probably about to ask what she wanted to order, but sophia was already out of her seat and walking towards you.

the moment the singer was in your eyesight, all your attention was on her, and a real smile crept onto your face. something sophia took great pride in.

the woman at the bar seemed to notice this, and with a sigh, gave up her seat, which sophia took without hesitation.

you offered sophia a shot “on the house,” you said.

she knew she shouldn’t accept it; she did have an early practice the next day, but she did anyway. still, after she told you of her plans for the morning, you made sure to keep her sober. there was no way you were going to be responsible for a bad rehearsal.

you spent your shift mixing drinks and pouring shots to strangers while carrying on a conversation with someone you actually wanted to know. and at the end of your shift— it was two in the morning by the way— as always, you walked her home.

she noticed your missing helmet and the skateboard under your arm. you told her you’d sold the bike before moving to la to have extra cash, and the board was the same one you’d been riding the day you first met.

on your way to the katseye house, you even tried to teach her how to ride it. it ended with you on the ground smiling stupidly, and her on top of you, laughing loudly.

that night, you also got your stolen - or borrowed, as sophia had said - wallet back.

sophia woke up that day smiling even more than usual, despite the lack of sleep. her members obviously noticed, and they were curious about where their leader had gone the night before.

their curiosity grew even more when, after practice ended, sophia did not stay another hour like she always did, but instead would be the first to leave the building. at first, no one said anything. but eventually, lara asked casually, receiving an equally casual answer. they were disappointed, to say the least.

over the next two months, sophia would do one of three things.

leave as soon as practice ended.

suddenly get up from the couch, and go out of the house for at least 3 hours.

go out at 6 pm and get back at 3 in the morning.

all the girls made an effort to find out what, or rather who, was taking all the filipina’s time. megan followed her around. lara tried to check her texts. yoonchae even asked her if she was going on a date, and she only got a laugh and a what are you talking about?

everyone knows sophia tells yoonchae everything. so if she didn’t know, something was up.

their last resort was to find out where she went at night. that task was assigned to manon.

manon’s plan was simple: take sophia out to a club so she wouldn’t go to her usual spot, and then get her drunk enough to confess.

the only problem? getting sophia to agree.

“sure, i’ll go with you”

“come on, it’s just—wait, did you say yes?” sophia nodded “wow, i thought it would be harder.”

manon suggested her go to club, which she had last gone to when daniela and sophia had picked her up, and the black girl had thrown up on the bushes outside while a hot bartender was watching.

sophia acted as if she preferred to go anywhere but there, then agreed anyway.

as soon as they entered, manon made a beeline to the bar. “oh no,” she said, turning to look at the other girl “the bartender from last time is here!” she then noticed the filipina was already looking at you and she was… waving?

you walked up to them with a bright smile, “manon! haven’t seen you in a while. sophia, good to see you again.” you greeted them, wiping the counter.

sophia casually leaned her elbows on it. “hi y/n, your best cocktail, please?” sophia asked, while manon just observed, confused.

no way in just a five minute interaction two months ago you could be this close. manon didn’t even know your name, and her friend was here asking for your best cocktail? sophia didn’t even want to come here in the first place!

you started working on sophia’s drink, and manon stood there blinking slowly.

you carefully placed a blue martini in front of sophia, then pured a clear shot for manon, who look at it with a raised eyebrow, nonetheless she accepted the drink. “last time you asked for whatever i wanted. here it is.” the girl in braids was a little surprise by how well you remembered your only interaction.

she gagged, “ugh, what is this?”

you laughed at her reaction, “colombian alcohol. didn’t you try it in medellin?”

okay this was getting weird. manon could’ve been a little out of her when she went up to the bar last time, but she was hundred percent sure she did not tell you anything about her life, and if she somehow had, the last thing she would’ve told you was their trip to medellin to film a music video.

panicking, she turned to her leader, trying to subtly tell her that maybe they should leave because the hot bartender was actually a creepy bartender. but sophia did not even glance in her direction; she was too busy looking at the stalker in front of them!

“oh, i remember!” sophia suddenly exclaimed, “you said it was the best, but it tasted horrible. you didn’t even take one yourself!”

you laughed “i was driving you to the hotel! you don’t drink and drive, do you?.” manon was only thinking one thing: what the fuck is going on?

“drink it now,” sophia dared you.

then you started arguing about how you could not drink while working to which the other girl said no one would notice. after arguing back and forth— more flirting like back and forth —, you caved and took the shot of whatever disgusting thing you had given manon, without even flinching. sophia giggled at your smug expression.

how did this happen? the black girl didn’t know, but she was sure of one thing, and the group chat needed to be aware of it too: sophia has a gf!!!!!!

the other girls’ response was instant. lots of messages were sent in just seconds, but sophia did not pick up her phone to see what all the sudden notifications were about, she kept talking with you.

even though manon wanted to know everything from the start, with detail, she decided to leave you be and went to the dance floor. she was going to get her answers later. she’d make sure of it.

sophia joined her almost an hour later with a different drink in hand, a red one, saying something about it being more crowded than usual, and you being busy making drinks. how did she know what the usual was? manon would find out!

“so… the bartender?” manon wiggled her eyebrows teasingly

“what about her?”

“you tell me ms. ‘your best cocktail, please’.”

sophia rolled her eyes “we’ve been talking.”

“‘we’ve been talking’” manon mocked her, voice higher than usual. “since when do you talk to bartenders?”

sophia shrugged, “you kind of made me talk to her when you were throwing your insides out.”

the older girl grimaced at the memory, “okay, fair point. but, you are here talking to her as if you’ve known her all your life!”

“it’s part of her job,” sophia argued.

“no, her job is to serve drinks to customers,” manon started, “not to flirt with them. and it certainly isn’t to know their life story.”

“she’s just attentive,” she said casually.

manon, however, was not buying it “yeah, attentive. and she is also what? psychic? she knew we went to medellin!”

sophia sipped her drink “i mean, we are famous, it’s on the internet. or maybe you told her last time.”

“sophia” manon’s tone turned stern. she was clearly tired of the filipina dodging her questions. but sophia was not going down easily either. manon sighed, if sophia wasn’t going to spill, she would keep asking until the other girl got tired.

“okay” she said slowly, “where did you meet her?”

“here”

“just here?”

another sip “mostly”

“sophia!”

the girl groaned “fine! i’ve run into her a couple times before. i need another drink.” sophia walked up to the bar, manon following closely.

you noticed them immediately, just like when they first came into the club. “back so soon?” you asked, a smirk on your face.

“manon’s being annoying.”

with an offended look the accused girl said “i’m being curious.” they started bickering so fast you couldn’t understand a word.

you looked between them amused. sophia had told you everything about her relationship with all the girls. how they were like her sisters, and she had a strong their bond was. they definetly looked like sisters at the moment.

suddenly manon gasped so loud that even people around turned to look at you. “wallet girl!” she screamed, pointing straight at you.

the music seemed to get low at her comment. sophia’s face shifted from playful to shocked.

“you were the girl who stole sophia’s wallet when we were in dream academy! i remember you now, i was watching through the window. she had ten dollars, did you pay her back?”

now it was your turn to look offended “i did not steal her wallet that time! how many times do i have to say it!”

manon raised one eyebrow “so you stole it another time?” you looked away, scratching your neck “sophia! you are dating a criminal! and she stole your wallet, how fucked is that?”

“manon!” she hissed “lower your voice. she is not a criminal, and she never stole anything.”

“i stole your heart” you winked, sophia turned to you with an unamused look “sorry.” you added quickly

manon now had a shit eating grin on her face “the girls are going to love this.” she said fishing out her phone and walking away to update everyone.

“well, secrets out,” sophia said sighing.

you chuckled, “at least you don’t have to keep sneaking around?”

she smiled, “i guess.” she looked around, nervously fidgeting with her hands “if you want to, you could meet them. officially.”

“family introductions already?” you said teasingly, but then smiled warmly at the girl at the other side of the counter “i would love to.”

“great. prepare for endless teasing.”

“how bad can it get?”

“really bad,” she answered honestly. “i think i’ll leave now, gotta make sure manon doesn’t run her mouth too much.”

you laughed “i’ll text you when my shift ends.”

sophia then leaned over the counter and left a kiss on your cheek “i’ll be waiting.”

with that she walked over to her friend, who had her jaw on the floor, furiously typing on her phone. with a final wave, sophia left the club, manon asking a million questions at her side.

[teaeodora]

"IN THIS HOUSE, THE WIFE REIGNS SUPREME! "

a/n: am i back? or perhaps this is a mere illusion..

synopsis: when faced with their wife's wrath, even the mightiest men of the land are forced to comply.

contents: small anecdotes, maybe ooc diluc because once again I am bad at writing him??? implied!female, whipped men (why not?) loser coded cuties scared of their wifes, mentions of pregnancy (wriothesley), swearing (mild), fluff, i blanked out mid way writing this but it is what it is and i find it cute, self indulgent.

not proof read.

DILUC !

Master Diluc was always in control. After all he ran the biggest winery in the entirety of Tevyat. Ledgers, Budgets, Circulation of goods, transactions, loans — this man could do it all.

On paper, he was the perfect husband. He was secure in himself, didn't take anyone's incompetence and preferred a quiet life with you. What more can a man desire?

However, as the saying goes - nothing is perfect. So having Kaeya, his stepbrother's continuous coercion into drinking was the imperfect part of his life. It was ironic really, being the owner of a winery, he held a distaste for alcohol and preferred grape juice.

Yet today he sat in his own tavern, one glass down. How had he come to this? How did he magically end up with one whole glass of wine in his system, coursing through his veins? He had no recollection.

He half heartedly listened to Kaeya and Rosaria's conversation when his ears caught another conversation. Two customers talked about having "wife" troubles and how they regret marrying so suddenly.

It was almost as if his tongue had gained consciousness of its own and the word fell out of Diluc's mouth, "As a man, if you only love one woman and then married her immediately—"

"Master Diluc" Kaeya tried. TRIED to stop this man.*

"...then you're truly foolish," Diluc finished. The silence that came next was merely the calm before the storm.

"Is that so?" the voice spoke up from behind. If anyone held the world record of sobering up in a matter of seconds- it would be Diluc Ragvinder right now.

"So..are you clever..or foolish for loving and cherishing me?" You leaned in, eyes radiating the clear sign— one wrong move and the celebrated Dark Knight Hero would be straight into his grave.

Diluc blinked once, twice- before stammering out in a fit of panic "uh..uh yes..yes ofcourse, I am foolish," he quickly admitted.

That may have saved him for the couch tonight but Kaeya was certainly not going to let him live this down.

ALHAITHAM !

Alhaitham never hid the fact that he disliked being the Acting Grand Sage. The only positive part of the circumstance was that he had access to all the documents and he could analyse them all he wanted and leverage them to his favour in the future. If needed.

Thing was, now he had to oversee twice as many workers of the Akademiya and it was twice as grating at his nerves. He'd rather be rejecting applications into the Akademiya for his own amusement than be a leader. He was clear with he wanted — peace, quiet and stable income. Rest? He didn't care enough or purposefully tuned it out.

He was been a slight hardass to the employees, critiquing their work, pointing out alignment issues on documentation, muttering something on the lines of a 12 slab long relic being easier to decipher than this utterly mind numbimg report submitted by one of the freshers. He couldn't take it and reallocated the guy to some other department.

Now the others were worried of meeting the same fate. So desperate times called for desperate measures. You.

Alhaitham sat that day in his office, feeling uneasy. Why did it feel like something bad was going to happen?

Click. Click. Click.

Oh, he'd recognised that sound anywhere.

"I have heard that you are being a hard ass...to the employees..." you stood near his desk, foot tapping in a rhythmic motion, screaming "You better have a logical explanation"

Alhaitham gulped. Gulped. His adam's apple bobbing up and down in subtle apprehension. "Look, it is just that their work isn't upto the mark—"

"Then instruct them instead of firing people and causing terror."

Alhaitham was the Acting Grand Sage. He was the highest authority. He held dominance over every operation. However, domestic operations seemed to be the one field he seemed to be rendered helpless at.

WRIOTHESLEY !

Fontaine, the land of mechas, tea parties, elegant dresses, and ofcourse downpours.

The bakery was warm, contrary to the cold weather outside, full of delightful scents of baked bread, steaming buns, delectable cookies and much more. The owner smiled to themselves, cleaning the top of glass display, content with what they had established.

The bell rang, signaling someone entering the bakery. Who in their right mind would come in this downpour? The owner took the appreance of the man soaked from head to toe, his black hair damp and a bit flattened, the overcoat hanging off his shoulders seemed heavy and dripped with water. His boots thudded against the floor as he approached the counter.

"...Your Grace!?" The owner sputtered at the sight of the Duke of the Meropide, a man who was as illusive as they came. "What brings you here?" The owner couldn't help but ask, seeing the man who braved the storm and was now in his store.

"I need your sweetest baked good. And please, stuff it with extra chocolate. Extra means extra. The Duke emphasied on the extra part.

"Yes but...if you don't mind me asking, why are you out here in such a weather?"

"Because my wife is craving something sweet. And that's an order as far as I know it," the Duke laughed, both from amusement and the fear of being murdered in cold blood by a woman 27 weeks into pregnancy.

"Oh."

"Oh indeed."

Wriothesley returned 30 minutes later, both proud and tired, "here love I got you the—"

You looked at him and sheepishly grinned "um i actually want your spicy BBQ ribs..."

...

Someone end him please.

NEUVILLETTE !

Neuvillette scribbled at the paperwork that piled up on his desk. Admistrative reforms, trade permits, policy amendment suggestions, court cases...

Tick tock tick tock

He glanced at the time. It was 8:30. He had strict orders to return home by 9. Non negotiable. After all his lovely wife said she would prep the best dinner date for the both of them and had been looking forward to it the entire week.

He couldn't help but smile the memory of her smile, her excited words as she explained her plans for the date, the different things she'd bake. It made his heart flutter. Neuvillette was a person unable to feel things — his position as the Chief Justice demanded that from him. Yet amidst all that, he enjoyed having a small space of comfort and familiarity he had created for himself. Just you and him. Nothing else.

Problem was—

8:35

"Monsieur Neuvillette, you've got these letters, some from the nobles, few from the common public." Sedene, the melusine receptionist reported, placing the heap of letters on his table.

8:40

"Monsieur, have you reviewed the case files for tomorrow? The board is asking for it." Sedene asked, waiting as he got up to retrieve the files.

He sighed, satisfied that he was finished with his duties for today. Now he could organize his space and still have time to get back home—

8:45.

"Monsieur! This needs your immediate approval! Its about amendment demands in the overseas trades by the foreign envoy"

Neuvillette wanted to pinch his nose. Seriously? How is it that the moment he fathoms the thought of some leisure...work finds its way to him? He was desperate to leave.

"Please tell them that my work hours are over and to come back in the morning." Neuvillette politely said.

"But they are not listening Monsieur—"

...sigh guess he had no choice.

He knew you would be furious. After all, he was 30 whole minutes later. Not one minute, not two but 30. As expected you were furious and it made fear and nervousness creep up his spine. The Iudex was a man of utmost authority. His judgement was absolute and his confidence was resolute.

Yet, all seemed to combust at the sight of you.

"Why?"

"Stubborn foreign envoy" he replied curtly, not beating around the bush.

You nodded before chuckling at his serious expression. "Relax honey, I am not going to skewer you with a fork."

Neuvillette exhaled in relief, "Thank god. Though I sincerely apologise my love."

"Oh no need. Just your company is enough" you smiled before going back to reheating the food.

Neuvillette didn't believing in falling in love twice. But hell he just did. With the same person that he devoted his heart to from the start.

ZHONGLI !

"Honey, you're going out, yes?' You called out to Zhongli, who was finishing up getting ready for the day.

"Yes dear," Your husband replied in deep opulent tone, enough to make your knees buck every single time.

"Please get milk, eggs and meat on your way back...we are out of it and I won't be able to make stew with just vegetables," You peeped out from the kitchen. He smiled, "ofcourse. I'll be back by noon."

Zhongli had impeccable memory. He could recall every moment of every war from millenias ago. Yet a small voice nagged at his brain. He was forgetting something. What was he forgetting?

"Director Hu, am I forgetting something?"

Hu tao turned around, looking utterly baffled, "you? Forgetting something? That's impossible Zhongli."

Zhongli thought for a bit more before agreeing. Yeah, he never forgot anything. Maybe it was just him overthinking...

If only he had listen to all the alarms that warned him for what was about to come.

"I am home" Zhongli announced softly, taking off his shoes and stepping into the house.

"Welcome back!" You greeted him with the same warm smile the Lord of Contracts had grown to love. In his eyes, not even the mostly radiant Cor Lapis could match your radiance.

Then the dreaded question came.

"Did you get the groceries?"

pause. visible sweat drop.

So that was what he forgot.

"Um.." Zhongli sheepishly scratched at his cheek,* "...it seemed to have slipped my mind. You see dear, Director Hu needed my help with the funeral preparations and then Childe accompanied me to this ancient artifact stall where they were selling rather intriguing pieces—"

"So, you forgot groceries but bought artifacts?"

"..."

And for the first time in a thousand centuries, Deus Auri had to stare at a dinner full of artifacts after his beloved reprimanded him, saying "since artifacts are so important, might as well satisfy your hunger with it too."

a/n : IT IS FINALLY OUT. THIS HAS BEEN IN MY DRAFTS SINCE LAST YEAR AKANDOAUDS I had such a fun time writing this- and giggled so much. So i hope you giggled too. Have a good day/night smoochies my loves.

creds: @teaeodora , banner creds : hoyoverse

[infinitydivine]

Letters From their Dream Realm: What your future Spouse/person has seen about you in their dreams

✨If this reading resonates with you, kindly share it to help your reader :)

✨The extended reading can be found on my Patreon and is also available for sale as a post without becoming a member :)

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Choose your pile intuitively. Take what resonates and leave the other things. If you think this reading is not for you then choose another pile. If still it doesn't resonate then this might not be your reading. There are Three Piles.

Hello Pile 1~~~

✧ “You’re the Light I Kept Seeing Before I Knew What Light Was” ✧

Hey you,

I don’t know where to start. It’s strange to admit this, but I’ve seen you long before I ever knew your name. Long before I even believed in dreams carrying anything real, like to me dreams were nothing but projections of our subconscious minds. But You came in pieces...blurry visions, soft echoes, a laugh that felt like it came from the other side of time. I saw you before I knew I was looking for you. And now I wonder if my soul knew something my conscious and subconscious mind didn’t.The first dream I had of you... you didn’t have a face. Not at first. You were all feeling...the feeling of warmth and stillness, like walking into a room where the light falls just right and everything hushes. I remember your hands before anything else. Reaching out. Not touching, just hovering close, like you were asking permission. I didn’t realize until much later that it was my soul you were reaching for and not my body, not my name, not even my past.You walked with me through a garden that didn’t belong to this world. It was at dusk I think. Everything glowed with this strange otherworldly light, and yet I wasn’t afraid. You weren’t speaking, but I could feel your voice in my bones. That’s how I knew it was you. The dream repeated for weeks, changing slightly with more details, more clarity until your face finally formed. And when it did, I woke up in tears. I didn’t even know why. Extended reading on Patreon

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Hello Pile 2~~~

✧ “I Knew You by Your Light Before I Knew You by Your Face” ✧

My love,

Only if you knew how often I’ve wandered into dreams searching for you. Not always on purpose sometimes, I was just trying to escape myself, trying to be numb. But somehow, you always appeared. Like a lighthouse for the parts of me, that drifted too far from shore in the search for the light that had disappeared from my life, my soul.You come in like a flicker at first, like a feeling in the air. A soft shimmer around the corners of the scene, like the dream itself was holding its breath for you to arrive. I smelled the sweet and soft breeze that was blowing along the shore that day. And when you do come, it’s never loud or sudden. You don’t burst in my love...you emerge. Gently. Like moonlight through curtains, like how a light just passes through them.

I’ve seen you in the middle of chaos. I’ve seen you dancing on rooftops, laughing at something I didn’t understand but wanted to. I’ve seen you carrying broken pieces of yourself like offerings, not knowing that even in your hurt, you were holy. I’ve seen your soul in colours the waking world doesn’t even know how to name.Once, you stood at the centre of a burning city but completely calm. Everything was crumbling around us, but you didn’t move. You just looked at me and said, “Don’t worry. This version of me is just the beginning.” I didn’t understand it at the time but I do now. Because I’ve watched you transform. Extended reading on Patreon

If you liked the reading, book a personal reading with me or you could leave a tip for the reader.

Hello Pile 3~~~

✧ “Even Before I Loved You, I Remembered You” ✧

Hi, love.

These words have been sitting in my mind ever since the first night you slipped into my dreams like the moonlight soft, familiar, and strange all at once. You didn’t knock. You didn’t ask to be let in. You just… appeared. And somehow, every part of me already knew it was you.There were no thunders. No dramatic sparks. Just peace. The kind that settles into you when something finally makes sense.You walked into that first dream like you’d been doing it forever. I was sitting at atable with one empty chair. And you filled it. Not awkwardly. Not with hesitation. Like you belonged there. Like you were always meant to be there.I remember that dream down to the detail and how you looked at me with eyes that said, “You’re not dreaming. This is real.” How you smiled like you had been waiting a thousand years just to say hi again. That was the first time I felt it...the recognition. A soul-level déjà vu that made me want to cry and laugh at the same time.

I didn’t know your name, but I knew your energy. I felt it, every bone in my body felt it.There’s something about you that feels like the answer to a question I forgot I was asking.In some dreams, we’re living simple lives. Folding laundry together. Cooking barefoot. You, humming some tune you made up on the spot. Me, watching you like you hung the damn stars. Extended reading on Patreon

If you liked the reading, book a personal reading with me or you could leave a tip for the reader.

Thank you and Love,

Infinity

Dividers credit~~~@uzmacchiato

[jaja-salute]

Desperate looks good on a man, pt. 1

summary: Kwon Soonyoung yearns for love, and it's heartwrenching.

pairings: kwon soonyoung x reader

word count: 4k

tags/warnings: slight angst? idk, yearning, cursing, mentions of emotional distress, alcohol consumption (drink responsively), morally gray arrangement (getting paid for affection, not prostitution though), soonyoung is desperate for body warmth, Carat reader, post military enlistment, future hoshi, suggestive, smut in part two.

MINORS DO NOT INTERACT

commentary: I woke up this morning only with the idea of Hoshi and somnophilia. This is not Hoshi and somnophilia, I don't know what happened. Part two will come, I hope soon.

The parts in italics are Hoshi's thoughts.

Not proofreaded, maybe I'll correct during these days. Tell me if I missed anything, and enjoy!

Reblogs and likes are highly appreciated :) <3

____________________________________________________________

Kwon Soonyoug's biggest desire was settling down, to find a wife and start a family, feeling loved and have his heart taken care of.

It was something, someone, he couldn't afford, be that because of his career and his hectic schedule, leaving no time to meet someone and make a connection deep enough. The absence of that figure in his life was eating him alive.

He found you one night out, he was with friends, drank his ass out, and now his head was laying flat on the side on the table, eyes empty and on the verge of crying again. His friends mingled and chatted, checking on him occasionally, sadly they were used to these antics at this rate, and just let him be and deal with it at his own pace. But you saw him like that for the first time, the cheerful and full of energy Hoshi you knew from the stage now lying in despair, drunk and miserable. You had no second thought, and reached out.

"Hi, are you alright?" You gently stroked his back. Soonyoung lifted his head, eyes lost until they landed on your face. You were smiling warmly at him, despite the concern in your eyes. "Hi," you repeated, "you drank a lot?" He simply nodded, still lost at how gentle you were being with him, despite not knowing him at all. You were a stranger, and yet he was drawn to you, he really must have been desperate. He lifts himself, now sitting almost straight in the booth, and looks at you. You were dressed in a typical night out dress, tight where needed and definitely made for catching glances. He managed to peel his eyes off your body, liking it a bit too much.

"Hoshi are you okay?" You said with a chuckle. That sobered him a bit. Fuck, a Carat. He sighed, Another chance lost, he thought. "Yes, yes, I'm okay. Don't worry Caratdeul." He wanted it to be over as soon as possible, and go back to being miserable. "You don't look okay though. Want to talk about it?"

Distance Soonyoung, put some fucking distance, she's a fan no matter how good she looks and gentle she is and how soft she looks, and good and cute and hot and how much you crave human touch- his drunk brain managed some reason even though he spiralled in that loneliness once again. "I have my friends for that, thank you." He managed a smile, which did not reach his eyes. Please go before I crumble, please. You chuckle again, "I know, and sorry for overstepping, I didn't want to be disrespectful or anything, you just looked sad, and i couldn't bear it. Remember that Carats love you, unconditionally. Don't you dare forget it. Okay Hoshi?" And you smile again, and your hand is on his, little in comparison, squeezing it in a soothing gesture. He is devastated to the point that is ridiculous. You let go of his hand and nod him a goodbye, and he swears he wants to cry.

He must be drunk and delirious, because after seeing you take the corner for the bathroom, he springs up, almost stumbling on the ground, and he is running after you. He faintly hears a few “Hyung! Where are you going!?” probably from Chan, but he can't seem to stop. He sees you step in the hallway and shortens the distance in seconds.

You turn around at the sound of footsteps and your eyes widen at the sight. "Hoshi? What are you-" "I am so sorry but please, please come with me." He takes your wrist (why is it so small in his hand??), and leads you in one of the private rooms, luckily empty.

When he turns, you look bewildered and scared. It tears his heart. "No no no don't, I- I wouldn't ever harm you or anything i just wanted to talk with you, I- , I needed to talk to you" he finishes out of breath. His distress softens your expression, but you still look concerned. "Okay, I get it Hoshi, but it looks really sketchy form my point of view."

He takes a deep breath and gestures towards the sofa. "Let's sit?" After the two of you are seated, he takes a deep breath and looks at you, while you still have that gentle and loving look in your eyes. God he is completely lost, he knew Carat’s love, of course he knew it, but so so much time passed, the enlistment happened and he swears he almost forgot it, but seeing it now? It held his heart in a chokehold. He swallowed down the lump in his throat and tried to speak. “I- …I am not doing that good. And I know is wrong, to take it out on you, a fan, but tonight I really can’t take it anymore.” “Are you okay to talk about it with me?” to the question he breaths out a laugh “I really shouldn’t, but we are here now, right?” He looks at you defeated, and you nod at him, urging him to keep going.

“I feel lonely.” You look at him puzzled. “But you have a lot of friends and your family?” He closes his eyes defeated, “Not that kind of lonely.” “Oh.” There’s a pause as you think about it, “Well, I bet that you can get any kind of girl you like? I mean, I can list all your qualities if you need a confidence boost.” He laughs bitterly, “Is not that easy, to build long lasting connections in this industry, I can’t count how many girls, colleagues, went through me to try it with the boys, and yes a lot of times is Mingyu,” he says rolling his eyes, “it’s all so, fast, brief, superficial. And I am in my thirties, time is running out-” “You are being dramatic now, you are thirty-two not sixty-” “I am running out of time if I want to build a family though.”  That leaves you speechless.

He sighs deeply, putting his face in his hands, head down. You feel the urge to comfort him, but there should be the invisible wall separating fan and idol, the mutual respect for personal space. Even if Soonyoung was the first one to take a brick out. “Can I touch you?” you ask in a small voice. Please, please, please, please, please, please, please do – “I might cry right now if you do.” “But you look like you need a hug.” You wait for his permission, and when he looks up from his hands and looks at you, with the saddest eyes he ever had, you wrap your arms around him. Soonyoung feels his chest explode and tighten at the same time. He makes the absolute wrong decision to sigh into your neck, breathing in what’s left of your perfume and your scent. You smell warm, comforting, like home. Soonyoung’s grip tightens around you as he basks in your warmth. He lifts his head to meet your eyes, his are dazed and lost, blame it on the alcohol, but he was on another level of high after that hug.

“Feeling better?” you ask him, again with that smile, and every inch of his being is screaming kiss her kiss her kiss her, take her home, don’t let her go, you need her, but thankfully he knows how to respect boundaries, at least the inner ones, and simply nods, still dazed. You two detach from each other to Soonyoung’s despair. “I really hope that you can find someone that can be there for you when you need them like this. You deserve it.”

Fucking drunk brain, is the thought he is going to have permanently engraved in his brain for the next 24 hours. Because he already does not filter his thoughts enough, but now is on his worst level.

“Would you be down for it?” Fucking drunk brain.

“EH?”

He panics. Fucking drunk brain.

“I mean, not as my girlfriend, we don’t know each other, but if I need this kind of comfort.” Fucking drunk brain! Shut up for fucks sake!

“I- I don’t know, wouldn’t be better to do this with someone you know and have some kind of affection for?”

“I could pay you if needed.” OH MY FUCKING GOD, FUCKING DRUNK BRAIN SHUT UP.

With that you frown, hard. “So like a prostitute.”

“What!? NO, No! I would never, I didn’t intend it like that!! I don’t want – I – ” FUCKING DRUNK BRAIN.

“And what did you mean Kwon Soonyoung?” Fucking hell not the government name, DON’T YOU FUCKING DARE TO GET HARD-

“Just as you did now. I needed some affection, from someone that is not my friends or family. I can’t do this anymore, coming home to an empty house, eating alone, slee- being alone. I, I can’t take it.”

He can see your gears turn, considering it? He is already regretting it.

“Listen I understand it sounds bullshit and you should refu-”

“How much.”

“HUH?”

“How much are you willing to pay?”

Soonyoung is dumbfounded. “I…I don’t know, a lot? 700.000,00000 KRW?” FUCKING DRUNK BRAIN.

“Holy fuck, deal.”

“What?!” FUCKING DRUNK BRAIN.

“I know is shallow but I need the money, I am a university student after all, and the convenience store pays like shit.”

“You are a university student?” FUCKING DRUNK BRAIN. SHE IS TOO FUCKING YOUNG FOR YOU.

“Yes, why?”

“You are young.”

“Not that young, we are four years apart. I am finishing my master’s degree.”

He audibly sighs in relief, and you just laugh. “So, do we have a deal?” and you extend out a hand. He looks at it, head still spinning from the news that you are a student, but not that young but still a student, and he shakes it without thinking too much about it. “Deal” Fucking drunk brain.

“Okay, but I should sign an NDA or something right? Your safety should be put first.” “I’ll get my manager to draw out something for you to sign.” MR PARK IS GOING TO KILL YOU, YOU FUCKING CRETIN. “You should give me your number then.” And he says that with a smile. After you two exchange numbers, he feels lightheaded, he couldn’t believe what he had done, but finally he would not come home to an empty house. You bid your goodbye with a hug, and Soonyoung does not want to let go.

When he comes back, Chan is the definition of panic. “What have you done hyung?!” growing more concerned since his favourite hyung was not moping anymore, but still pretty drunk. Soonyoung lifts his phone and says, grinning “Just got a girl's number.”

The morning after is brutal, head feeling like he has a nail being hammered in his brain, and his eyes and throat so dry he can’t even blink nor talk. Fucking drunk brain.

Last night was a blur, he remembered drinking like an alcoholic, again, Chan scolding him…over a girl?? He paled, frantically searching for his phone. Fucking drunk brain. He opened the last conversation on KKTalk and there it was.

Hi! It’s Y/n, I hope your hangover will be gentle on you. I got home, safe and sound, I hope you did too. Last night was nice 😊

Fucking drunk brain.

It took him an hour and half to process everything, thankfully he did not tell Chan anything about the arrangement, but why on earth was he still considering it?? He did not text you in the whole day, but still contacted his manager, who just sighed and sent him a copy of the NDA, and a draft of the contract. It was concerning that something like that already existed, but yet again he was not surprised. He absentmindedly printed both of them, without even reading the papers and texted you to come over.

Hey is Hoshi! Is still crazy, but if you are still down for this deranged shit, come to this address and ring on Kwon. I have the paperwork ready. [location]

He spent the next moment pacing like a tiger in a cage around his apartment, regretting everything and thinking about how to tell you this was all a mistake, but then he was taking out two wine glasses and a bottle of red, and when he realised this was horribly 50 Shades of Gray coded and was about to put everything back the doorbell rang.

He saw from the camera that it was really you at the gate, and he opened it already, instructing you the floor number. When you knocked at his door, his heart was beating like crazy as he was fixing his hair in the mirror in the hallway.

When he opened the door, you were wearing the same clothes you had for the whole day at university. You looked so cute in his eyes it was painful.

“I am so sorry! I came straight from my lecture. May I come in?” He nods and moves to let you in. you are gawking at the luxury apartment, not believing you are actually in the house of one of your favourite singers. Soonyoung on the other hand is a bundle of nerves. He wasn’t able to mutter a letter ever since that doorbell rang and he was spiralling really bad. As you turn to him you see him struggle with himself. “Hoshi, are you all right?” you reach for him, and place your hand on his arm, the gesture is soft and incredibly grounding for his brain. “I am just really nervous, never had to do something like that.” You look at him with a soft expression. “If this is making you uncomfortable, I can sign only the NDA so this stays between us and then I can leave as I came.” “No!” he clears his throat, “I know this is, wrong somehow, and I should not be asking you this, for fucks sake, you are a fan too… but I can’t stop thinking about it, and I want someone, and I am sick of feeling lonely, and -” “Soonyoung.” He whips his head towards you. “If I wasn’t sure I wouldn’t be here. I am down with it. Are you?” his expression softens a bit still a bit unsure, but he nods. “Okay then,” you say with a smile, “let’s revise the contract.”

Relational Support Contract

The signing party agrees to the following statements and is responsible for any sharing of the disclosed information and therefore held accountable in front of the law.

This Agreement for Personal Support and Companionship ("Agreement") is entered into on this [Day] day of [Month], [Year], by and between:

Kwon Soonyoung 권순영 (hereinafter "Contractor"), residing at [ Address], and

[Signing Party's Full Name] (hereinafter "Supporter"), residing at [Supporter's Address].

1. Purpose of Agreement

The purpose of this Agreement is to outline the terms under which the Supporter will provide personal support, care, and companionship to the Contractor, recognizing the Contractor's desire for assistance with daily needs and for affectionate companionship. This Agreement is intended to foster a supportive and respectful relationship between the parties.

2. Scope of Support and Companionship

The Supporter agrees to provide the following services to the Contractor:

Physical Needs Support:

Assistance with meal preparation (e.g., cooking, grocery shopping, tidying kitchen after use).

Light household tasks directly related to the Contractor's immediate living space (e.g., tidying common areas, laundry).

    Emotional and Affectionate Companionship:

Providing active listening and conversational engagement.

Offering emotional reassurance and comfort.

Providing physical affection within mutually established and respected boundaries (e.g., hugs, holding hands), always subject to the explicit consent and comfort of both parties. Intimate or sexual services are implied upon the mutual agreement and consent of both parties.

3. Time Commitment and Availability

The Supporter agrees to be available for the Contractor at least 4 days per week between the hours of 01:00AM and 12:00PM, or as otherwise mutually agreed upon with reasonable notice.

This Agreement shall commence on Sptember 1st  and continue until terminated by either party as per Section 6.

4. Compensation and Expenses

In consideration for the support and companionship provided:

Monetary Compensation: The Contractor shall pay the Supporter the sum of 700.000,00000 KRW every 14 days, payable on the end of each week via cash.

The Contractor agrees to pay for all reasonable and pre-approved out-of-pocket expenses incurred on the Contractor's behalf (e.g., cost of groceries purchased for Contractor, entry fees for shared activities), provided valid receipts are submitted.

5. Boundaries, Respect, and Communication

Both parties agree to treat each other with mutual respect, dignity, and kindness.

Privacy: Both parties shall respect each other's personal space and privacy.

Confidentiality: Any personal information shared during the course of this Agreement shall be kept confidential by both parties.

Communication: Both parties commit to open and honest communication regarding needs, expectations, and any concerns that may arise. Regular check-ins to discuss the arrangement are encouraged.

 Exclusions: This Agreement explicitly excludes any medical care requiring professional licensure, financial management, or any activities deemed illegal or unethical.

6. Termination

This Agreement may be terminated by either party with 184 days (March 1st) written notice to the other party.

Notwithstanding the above, this Agreement may be terminated immediately by either party in the event of:

A serious breach of any of the agreed-upon terms.

Concerns regarding personal safety or well-being.

Mutual agreement.

7. Governing Law

This Agreement shall be governed by and construed in accordance with the laws of Korea, though, as stated, its enforceability regarding personal services can be limited.

8. Signatures

By signing below, both parties acknowledge that they have read, understood, and agree to the terms and conditions set forth in this Agreement.

Contractor: [Full Name]

Date:

Supporter: [Signing Party's Full Name]

Both of you stare at the paper. “Well, that’s a lot,” you chuckle as you set the paper aside and grab the NDA to sign it, “any thoughts on that?” Soonyoung is fixated on the only line on the contract that truly got his attention: Intimate or sexual services are implied upon the mutual agreement and consent of both parties. He hasn’t once thought about sex in all of this, and is dumbfounded about how is possible to even include this in the contract. You notice him being lost in thought and take a look at where his finger is underlining. “Ah! Yes that, I guess some people have those needs too, are you interested in that?” you say nonchalantly, to which Soonyoung responds with eyes as big as saucers and muttering a series of ‘No, no, absolutely not’ on repeat until you laugh. “Okay okay, I get it, don’t worry.” Then you grab the pen, and before Soonyoung can think to stop you, you sign it.

In the end the arrangement summed into you moving to his apartment in his spare bedroom during the times you would be here, occasionally staying at your dorm when lectures started early or you needed time for yourself. Six months are a lot if someone thinks about it, or are they?

The first few weeks were awkward for the both of you, but as soon as you two got used to each other, it turned out to pure bliss for Soonyoung. He would always come back to a homecooked meal, house clean and warm, and the presence of someone. Even Latte took a liking to you when he took her from his parents, and the late night poop strolls became one of his favourites. During the second month you two grew closer physically, letting the shyness melt away and experiment with touches. You discovered that Soonyoung loves when you play with his hair and drag your nails along his back when you watch a movie together, to the point that he falls asleep and leans on you. When he comes tired and sweaty from dance practice and you have dinner ready waiting for him at home, he runs on his way back. During schedules, when you send him updates from home on your day off from university, he longs to be home and whines until he is finished at work, refusing already two times in a row for a night out with the members. Soonyoung has never felt more content.

When you weren't there, he would search you in his sleep, call for you absentmindedly in the empty house when he wanted to share something. Your absence was deafening and he felt like shit every time he had to let you go because you had your own life, and this was a paid arrangement, and he needed to be reminded of that more times than he liked to admit. He wanted to keep you at arm length, so you would be at his place more than the four agreed days, and he would literally send someone to pick you up from university when he wanted you with him.

The night when the arrangement shifted for Soonyoung was when they were forced through meetings and shootings and promotions, he was working at the same time for his solo schedule and his upcoming solo album, so at the end of the day he was completely drained. You two were half into month three, November, you had midterms approaching in December and his house has turned in your favourite study place. He adored how you managed to cover a wall in sticky notes with the subjects you were studying. One night he found you collapsed on the floor, arms and head on the sofa, and a pencil holding your bun together. He picked you up and took you to bed, but as you protested that he was warm and to not let you go, he took you to his room, and you slept in the same bed for the first time. Your bed still has the same bedding as that night.

When Soonyoung returned home, exhausted and starving, he was met with music and the smell of Kimchi Jjigae and rice. When he peeked in the kitchen, he saw you swaying your hips and moving on tempo with the song, which he recognised as Thunder from their 10th anniversary. You managed to get the “Alo, Alo T-H-U-N-D-E-R Alo” part almost perfectly if you hadn’t bumped into the corner of the island and probably bruised your hip, by the curse you emitted. When you turned to the stove to stir the stew he sneaked behind you and placed his hands on your hips. You let out a surprised ‘Oh!’ but relaxed at his touch. “Evening to you too Soonie,” god he loved the nickname on your lips “tough day at work?” He sighed in your neck, getting himself closer but still keeping distance between your bodies, “You have no idea Bambi…” the nickname for you came out only when he was needy and really touch starved, when he needed that extra skin ship to recharge himself, and at the pet name you perked up. “It must have been real hell for you to call me that huh?” you say as you keep stirring the pot. As you reach for another ingredient you brush against him, making his breath catch in his lungs, and when you come back into position, you are now with your back pressed against him, and tilting your head to the side you glance up at him. “Want to tell me about your day?” you say in a soft voice, and Soonyoung forgets about wanting to throw his coffee at the directors and producers of GoSe for the insane schedule for the next week of filming, forgets how he scolded Wonwoo and Seungcheol because they were spacing out during practice and forgot three times in a row the Super choreo, forgets about the vending machine taking his money and not getting his damn snack and forgets about the saesang that trailed behind him almost four blocks before his place until he snapped and literally roared at the molester. All he saw were your big and sparkly eyes, lips parted and unbelievably soft at the sight, and your back pressed against his chest.

You two kissed once, a month ago, during a stressful day like this one, when he came home pissed as ever, and to shut him up you pecked him on the cheek and then his lips, and his brain got fried. He was fighting himself so hard right now, to not dip his head and just kiss you until he can feel only you on and in his mouth.

He glanced at your lips, and he knew it was the biggest mistake of the night, because you knew how to be a tease and you knew that he crumbles like nothing. “See something you like, tiger?” Oof, that went straight to his dick. “Many things, the stew looks and smells divine. And I am starving.” He dipped his voice lower, knowing it made your knees weak. His hands left your hips, steadying himself on the counter. “Were you planning on some side dishes too?” “I had some in mind, mind to help if you are not tired?” He lost it when you leaned your nape on his shoulder and your throat laid bare at bite length for him. He swears he felt his teeth itch. Instead he swallowed the saliva pooled in his mouth, courtesy of the food and you, and nudging your carotid with his nose, breath fanning on your throat. Every fibre in him was screaming Bite her, mark her down, but one thing about Kwon Soonyoung: he was competitive and tenacious, and knew damn well when was the right time to pounce.

[heliumjay]

🐈‍⬛: Well, I'm the type of person who tends to overthink things. It's not just as simple as "oh, there's no water". My perspective has shifted a bit.

Of course, being a good singer, dancer, and being good-looking are all very important aspects of being an artist...that's the core of the job. But I've come to feel that, even before being a singer, it's a profession that affects a lot of people, not just bringing joy, but also a wide range of emotions.

Especially in places like fan sign events, where I get to have sincere conversations with fans, I realized early after debut that what we give isn't just joy or quick dopamine hits. That's really only a small part of it. Over time, I started to feel more deeply about how my actions, the way I think, and the influence I have might affect others. It made me reflect a lot.

The idea of what's "right"...the definition of that is something no one can set in stone. Everyone has their own standard of what's right. But even so, I want to do my best to be someone who lives by what I believe is right and try to pass that on to others as much as I can.

So I often find myself hitting a wall, constantly questioning what "right" even is. Even if I think one way, someone else might think differently. That makes me more cautious about the things I say.

Because of that, I've had more and more fans come to me for advice, sharing their worries, even asking for guidance about their future when we talk in person. And every time that happens, I really feel the weight of my words. (X)

I'm proud to call you my bias, my inspiration! I don't only see you as an idol but also the person behind the artist that you are. You are a wonderful artist and person, Jay.

[jazeswhbhaven]

I really don’t think that the new pirate card art for Bell and Mams is by the artist Nori, which makes me very sad. Nori’s art is the best part of whb . They’re continuing the unfortunate trend of Luci butler, Levi maid, Asmo teacher..

The selfie cards: peak. The OG attacker cards: peak. The angel cards: PEAK.

The amount of detail and care that went into those cards was phenomenal. The new art isn’t bad, it’s just not at Nori’s level.

The new art style is more unnaturally colorful/saturated and damningly less detailed.

Nori always drew Mams with a golden skin tone, whereas Mams pirate is super white.

Also, random, but when Nori drew nipples, they were less prominent and more.. dainty? I’m blanking on how to describe it, I just know that Mams pirate nipples don’t look like Nori’s.

I know I’m ranting but if you don’t update the main story, you monetize your game to Hell, and then you get rid of what made your gacha standout from the crowd (Nori’s gorgeous art), then what’s the incentive to keep playing??

There's a new thing I like doing now since being shown the differences and that's to look at the new card art and compare it to Nori's past work.

I specifically took a look at what you mentioned here about Mam's skintone and when set side by side you can see the render styles are different for sure. Nori's Mammon has golden/sun kissed skin for Mammon, the new artist gets the style right but they rely more on popping colors which is most likely why the saturation is the way that it is.

Also with the new artist they seem to work better with chiseled features and Nori excels with the softness and shape to muscles for Mammon. For the nipple comment, Nori's style uses a more soft approach whereas the new art HERE BE NIP NOP. (this is my dumbass way of describing it but I hope y'all get it 😭)

Mostly though I'm neutral on the new art, though I am worried about Beel's skintone in future arts. I don't have high hopes that they'll keep consistent but a l a s this always seems to happen in most games.

As for any other incentive(s) that could get a player to stay long term, I offer just the fandom and if you wanna pop in for the events.

also if you're just curious to see how far this game is actually gonna go.

[faceplanted-cat]

All right <cracks knuckles>. I'm gonna do this against my better judgement because I have enough time to burn right now. Let's see if we can go over each point being shared by OP and provide a rebuttal/commentary for the sake of good-faith discussion as well as some clarifications because many of these statements are downright presumptuous, some of which are just flat-out wrong. WARNING; LOOOOOONG POST AHEAD!!

Passages from OP will be placed in small and indented spaces for the sake of space, with any highlights by yours truly:

"I hope Seyka returns in Horizon 3. She and Aloy are a perfect fit. And the DLC tells us an important story. I want to shine some light on what Horizon is really about. Because it feels like many forgets, or simply ignores, the story of Aloy. I’ll also mention the power this one flashpoint holds over the fandom and the future of Aloy and Seyka, and the possibility of a step back in queer representation in games."

Opening statement with a thesis; not much commentary from me. Though Aloy and Seyka being seen as a perfect fit is a completely subjective statement and I will explain why later.

I personally don’t understand comments like: «The DLC/Seyloy was rushed». In a world like Horizon, they fight hard for their survival everyday, it makes sense they would love just as hard. No judgement was given to Varl and Zo. Heck, even Talanah fell fast for Amadis, and tracked him down all of FW. If anything, this opinion is so subjective on how a player experienced the DLC. Horizon isn’t supposed to be a RPG based on a player’s choice, but it feels like it’s going that direction. And that worries me a lot because: it’s not the player’s story; it’s Aloy’s! Horizon is after all a narrative driven game with RPG elements. Guerrilla should push on to deliver the story they want to tell us about the world, and about Aloy.

Yes, agreed regarding the worldbuilding and survival. However, to claim there was no judgement about Varl and Zo, as well as with Talanah and Amadis... it's completely untrue. Early on, for example, there were people who shipped Varl and Aloy from HZD days so you can imagine their reactions in FW. It's easy to critique their love story as written too fast--though you do run the risk from those who will accuse you of just being racist but that's a whole other can of worms—But unlike Aloy and Seyka, what happened with Varl & Zo can easily be explained away by an off-screen development. As for Talanah and Amadis, I'm sure the Talanah fans (and other parts of the fandom) can attest to how Amadis was poorly received especially after his 3D model was revealed in FW after his first appearance in Talanah's comic. No one I know in the fandom likes this man. We are always making fun of him.

But you're right, it is Aloy's story! And Guerrilla should indeed tell the story they want!

But here's the funny thing about media production of any kind: More often than not, stories are not completely set in stone when production begins and there is still room for flexibility. In fact, one of the biggest implications of the DLC after hearing the interviews scattered around the internet, is that they were so focused on giving Aloy a romance and show off their new tech, that they didn't take the time to really flesh out the rest of the plot. In other words, they were WAY too flexible. It's like attempting to build a wall, but in the process of making it look like a wall, they left it full of holes and tried to fill the gaps in haphazardly to meet the deadline.

The DLC delivers perfectly the next step for Aloy, which Forbidden West literally has foreshadowed all along. Varl and Zo, Talanah and Amadis, Alva with a gf back home, and especially the storyline about Tilda and Elisabet. So many other sidequests are about love. And many about romantic love. Forbidden West is about Aloy opening up for friendship and finding a team, finally starting to rely on others than herself. And when she allows herself to do that, she starts to allowing herself feeling romantic feelings.

Interesting that you mention Amadis again considering he becomes a non-character by the end of Talanah's side quest and you actually see how foolish Talanah had been with him.

But otherwise, yes, agreed with all this.

And that’s the point with the DLC. It’s about Aloy’s next step. Horizon has always been about Aloy and her journey. Not our journey as a player. And the flashpoints at the end of BS, is constructed very bad. It’s one of the few that has a different outcome, normally the flashpoints are there to convict Aloy’s deepest emotions in different ways, but almost every outcome goes the same.

"Players would grow into this identity, rather than simply directing an avatar. Even thought they would have choice through conversation options and playstyle, their options would always consist of things that Aloy could or would do" - Paul Davies, The Art of Horizon Zero Dawn (2017) (emphasis mine)

"We provide flash points because we want the player to be able to express their feelings. We always try to make sure those answers each represent an aspect of Aloy’s psyche. For such a big moment, we felt it was important to give the player that kind of opportunity, so if they really didn’t feel it was the right moment to kiss Seyka, they could [step back]." - Ben McCaw, Narrative Director of Guerrilla Games, Interview with GamesHub (emphasis mine)

There you go. Regardless if the outcomes are different or not (in fact in HZD, sometimes your choices do make a difference), each choice was specifically made with Aloy's psyche in mind. Each option is valid to Aloy's character. And if you speak with Varl, you'll notice that she directly expresses her ambivalence to their relationship regardless of your choice.

Here we can end or build a relationship with Seyka - and it’s up to us as players? It’s the most cowardly move I have ever seen in a game.

Presumptuous, for reasons I've already explained above.

Aloy has through the whole DLC, fallen more and more for Seyka. And to deny her these feelings at the end because PLAYERS should decide if Aloy is ready for the next step?? No. Aloy is ready. She has proved that. Aloy even says: «I thought I would never feel this way about anyone»- this is the first time she has fallen in love. And that should be respected. But we can deny her that? It’s super weird when you take a step back and think about it.

No one denies Aloy's feelings. But what one does with those feelings is the question. Each person has their own perspective and it's not always wise to jump directly into a relationship after confessing (I speak even from personal experience). No one denies she fell for Seyka, but considering their duties to their own squads and tribes, this statement frames it like Aloy should've just dropped everything and joined Seyka to be with her (never mind that they have the perfect tool for long-distance communication regardless of choice and that is never brought up).

Seyka is perfect for Aloy, because they recognize a lot in each other. And often, that is something that attracts us to another person. They challenge each other, banter a lot, but there is always respect. They respect each other quickly. Seyka especially is honest about what’s going on, and what she needs help with, and sees that she can help Aloy in return. They both keep their secrets. But then they both open up to each other.

Once again, a subjective statement. Ironically there was a lot of disrespect thrown Aloy's way when they first meet (the "sidekick" comment), more so than vice versa and their conversations in-game barely qualify for anything past professional banter. They open up to each other only because the situation demands they do, rather than a genuine desire to bond outside of external factors.

It’s also sad to read about Seyka only being treated as the romance option, which ofc is a natural state that she enters because of the development of the DLC. But many forgets that she is her own person, and in many ways she is the main protagonist in BS. I can write a whole post about Seyka to explore this further, but for now:

Here's the thing: A lot of us see Seyka less as just a romance figure, and more like lost potential. She would have been a great character in the DLC had they taken greater care with her motives, emotional development, and her dynamic with Aloy in relation to all the other characters the latter met and connected with. Instead, you have staff pushing for the idea that Seyka is "just like Aloy". You have a scene where Aloy very happily compliments Seyka's climbing despite having witnessed another earlier companion climb a sheer, icy mountain with just one hand (as an example). in other words, they could have done better with Seyka like they did with the other companions, but it fell flat to many of us.

Seyka has a lot of emotions and shows struggles with the Quen beliefs, and belonging to a tribe. Which Aloy also has dealt with! BUT, the point with FW is that Aloy learns about the importance of a people again. Something she ran away from in Zero Dawn. And when she sees Seyka struggling, Aloy sees a part of herself, and she knows the pain. And she wants to help Seyka with this. They bond over it. And that’s why the theme «home» at the end is so important. They both realize and learn this from each other.

Not much to argue with here. Good points. Except the difference is, Aloy gave up on her own tribe, against Rost's wishes in fact, while Seyka remained loyal the whole time to the Quen. It's subtle but there is certainly a difference. Plus Seyka wasn't born different, her choices and passion are what set her apart from her tribe, but Aloy, it was innate, just by being born.

Also, it had to be a new character to romance. Imagine it being a character we already know, it wouldn’t have been fair to any of the multiple ships that is out there. And if one reason to romance an existing character is that we already have a connection to them, then we are missing the point again. Because it’s about Aloy, and who she falls in love with- not us. And also, it wouldn’t have guaranteed that fans would be okay with an existing character to romance, you would have to learn to like that character as well.

Agreed with the idea that romancing anyone else we know in the DLC would have been disastrous. But here's the thing. One's development as a character doesn't have to rely on romance as the next step immediately. I have seen others argue that the DLC would have been the perfect opportunity to show us the deepening of Aloy and Beta's bond as sisters, since neither of them have that experience.

And so if Horizon 3 moves forward to give us multiple romance options, it will be the biggest set back in the series. It should not be a focus on romancing characters at all, because Horizon has never been about that, and frankly, Aloy doesn’t have time for it. That’s why in every scenario, Aloy needs to leave Seyka behind regardless. And that makes sense. If Aloy starts romancing seven different characters, it will not make sense for her story at all.

Allow me to turn to @foibles-fables once again with this post. Plus romance options for Aloy were always on the table from the very beginning of the series (I believe it was in the HZD guidebook but I can't find the screenshot rn). Part of the reason the DLC was even made was to test whether it was feasible to add it in for the next entry. Now how they choose to go about it, none of us know. But I hardly believe the concept of it is a set-back when it is quite easy as BG3 has shown us, to add romance without affecting the rest of the plot. But also, many of us would prefer no romance period too.

Horizon 3 should give us Seyka or no one, and honestly, it will be fine if they don’t end up together before the ending. Because the main story will be about Aloy’s finale battle to save the world from a threat- the side story will be about Aloy’s emotions. And it will be much better if they focus on her current development with Seyka, than pleasing fans and give us many choices. Because when will we have time to develop that connection with these other characters so that it will make sense? And if that isn’t an issue, than what’s wrong with Aloy and Seyka’s «rushed» romance? Perhaps that wasn’t the issue all along; the issue was perhaps that fans don’t like Seyka because she is the only romance option, and people are jealous. Then I ask again: do you really understand Horizon and respect Aloy’s story?

Subjective line, but also I do resent this idea that giving many choices is just about pleasing fans, rather than providing a variety of options to see how Aloy reacts and interacts. To assume jealousy is also preposterous when many of the disappointed players either never shipped Aloy with anyone to begin with, or ship her with pretty much everyone, and everyone else with everyone.

Again, quite presumptuous of OP. These comments reflect poorly on their arguments and only betray an incredibly simplistic (arguably insulting) view of the situation.

Fanshipping, fanart and fanfiction is one thing. But all in all, Aloy’s canon journey should be respected. These two years I’ve seen the majority of fans neglecting this side of Aloy, and pushing this narrative out of the picture, which also means Seyka has been pushed away. The danger with this message is: «we want gay characters, but not like this». And it even shows on Guerrilla, who has stopped promoting their queer characters, IN OUR TIME OF 2025!!

Except many of these fans have been around since as early as 2017 who already had the idea she was queer before it was even confirmed. It's strange to imply that desiring well-written gay characters is dangerous when queer people like myself are not required to accept what we think are poorly-written narratives or characterizations just because they're are queer.

Now, that point about Guerrilla stopping promotion of queer characters is another can of worms. But also one must consider that their base city, Amsterdam, celebrates Pride in August rather than June and they've always come out with promo for the occasion.

Should we not protect what we have and got in Burning Shores DLC? Instead fans complain, and wants other romances, and neglects Aloy’s queer journey by choosing NO?! How petty can one be, to not seperate your fanship with an actual queer representation because «it’s not good enough». This is what we have. And imagine what we can have if we unite instead of pushing it away and pretend it never happened.

I do not understand this notion of "protection". Fandom is not a religion or a closed-door community. People are free to have their opinions, their thoughts, their praises and criticisms of the material they enjoy. To say we are being petty is also once again, presumptuous and infantilizing, because many of us have these criticisms outside of our ships, if we even have them. Many of the critics are themselves experienced in storytelling, character writing, and media production so it's only fair for them to comment.

OP calls for unity, when half the reason many dislike Seyloy as a ship is because of the harassment many of them faced from the ship's fans since 2023 when the DLC came out, and arguments like these that are often baseless.

And so what about ship wars? This is just as petty as neglecting. But I think the root of these wars is that we don’t respect each other, and because we all have different views on Aloy’s story. If you are reading this and already feel angry about it, it’s most likely because our views are different. Or maybe it’s because you know deep inside that I’m onto something, that you don’t want to acknowledge. But if we can agree on anything, it should be about fighting to keep the queer representation in Horizon, rather than fighting among ourselves and complain so much that even the gaming developers stops promoting it.

Once again, presumptuous. As I said earlier, the DLC brought out the worst in many people, whether it was homophobia, petty gate-keeping, or just outright harassment. While others sat on the sidelines avoiding the fallout in public online spaces, still others felt no choice but to face the trolling and harassment head on. If we are angry, it is not because we think you are on to something, but because it appears you have hugely misrepresented a good chunk of the fandom and assume biases that don't actually exist.

I make these rebuttals on good faith, not to start some war, but to provide answers and clarifications to the things you have said. I do appreciate OP's attempt to argue in favor of Seyloy, but unfortunately they are only one more from several other ship manifestos in the fandom.

Now, for my final point, I recommend for all thoes agreeing with OP to turn to @focusontheheart. This fandom-wide project was created out of love for the franchise and is the most prominent example of fandom unity since the DLC came out. It features writers and artists and coders from all over the globe, with romance routes for most major NPCs, including Seyka. The writers who were brought on for her route were also Seyloy shippers, and based on my playthrough, I believe they did a great and faithful job, giving justice to both Aloy and Seyka's characters and their budding relationship. I suggest trying it out for yourselves and see what you think :)

A view on Burning Shores DLC

I hope Seyka returns in Horizon 3. She and Aloy are a perfect fit. And the DLC tells us an important story. I want to shine some light on what Horizon is really about. Because it feels like many forgets, or simply ignores, the story of Aloy. I’ll also mention the power this one flashpoint holds over the fandom and the future of Aloy and Seyka, and the possibility of a step back in queer representation in games.

I personally don’t understand comments like: «The DLC/Seyloy was rushed». In a world like Horizon, they fight hard for their survival everyday, it makes sense they would love just as hard. No judgement was given to Varl and Zo. Heck, even Talanah fell fast for Amadis, and tracked him down all of FW. If anything, this opinion is so subjective on how a player experienced the DLC. Horizon isn’t supposed to be a RPG based on a player’s choice, but it feels like it’s going that direction. And that worries me a lot because: it’s not the player’s story; it’s Aloy’s!

Horizon is afterall a narrative driven game with RPG elements. Guerrilla should push on to deliver the story they want to tell us about the world, and about Aloy.

The DLC delivers perfectly the next step for Aloy, which Forbidden West literally has foreshadowed all along. Varl and Zo, Talanah and Amadis, Alva with a gf back home, and especially the storyline about Tilda and Elisabet. So many other sidequests are about love. And many about romantic love. Forbidden West is about Aloy opening up for friendship and finding a team, finally starting to rely on others than herself. And when she allows herself to do that, she starts to allowing herself feeling romantic feelings.

And that’s the point with the DLC. It’s about Aloy’s next step. Horizon has always been about Aloy and her journey. Not our journey as a player. And the flashpoints at the end of BS, is constructed very bad. It’s one of the few that has a different outcome, normally the flashpoints are there to convict Aloy’s deepest emotions in different ways, but almost every outcome goes the same.

Here we can end or build a relationship with Seyka - and it’s up to us as players? It’s the most cowardly move I have ever seen in a game.

Aloy has through the whole DLC, fallen more and more for Seyka. And to deny her these feelings at the end because PLAYERS should decide if Aloy is ready for the next step?? No. Aloy is ready. She has proved that. Aloy even says: «I thought I would never feel this way about anyone»- this is the first time she has fallen in love. And that should be respected. But we can deny her that? It’s super weird when you take a step back and think about it.

Seyka is perfect for Aloy, because they recognize a lot in each other. And often, that is something that attracts us to another person. They challenge eachother, banter a lot, but there is always respect. They respect eachother quickly. Seyka especially is honest about what’s going on, and what she needs help with, and sees that she can help Aloy in return. They both keep their secrets. But then they both open up to eachother.

It’s also sad to read about Seyka only being treated as the romance option, which ofc is a natural state that she enters because of the development of the DLC. But many forgets that she is her own person, and in many ways she is the main protagonist in BS. I can write a whole post about Seyka to explore this further, but for now:

Seyka has a lot of emotions and shows struggles with the Quen beliefs, and belonging to a tribe. Which Aloy also has dealt with! BUT, the point with FW is that Aloy learns about the importance of a people again. Something she ran away from in Zero Dawn. And when she sees Seyka struggling, Aloy sees a part of herself, and she knows the pain. And she wants to help Seyka with this. They bond over it. And that’s why the theme «home» at the end is so important. They both realize and learn this from eachother.

Also, it had to be a new character to romance. Imagine it being a character we already know, it wouldn’t have been fair to any of the multiple ships that is out there. And if one reason to romance an existing character is that we already have a connection to them, then we are missing the point again. Because it’s about Aloy, and who she falls in love with- not us. And also, it wouldn’t have guaranteed that fans would be okay with an existing character to romance, you would have to learn to like that character as well.

And so if Horizon 3 moves forward to give us multiple romance options, it will be the biggest set back in the series. It should not be a focus on romancing characters at all, because Horizon has never been about that, and frankly, Aloy doesn’t have time for it. That’s why in every scenario, Aloy needs to leave Seyka behind regardless. And that makes sense. If Aloy starts romancing seven different characters, it will not make sense for her story at all.

Horizon 3 should give us Seyka or no one, and honestly, it will be fine if they don’t end up together before the ending. Because the main story will be about Aloy’s finale battle to save the world from a threat- the side story will be about Aloy’s emotions. And it will be much better if they focus on her current development with Seyka, than pleasing fans and give us many choices. Because when will we have time to develop that connection with these other characters so that it will make sense? And if that isn’t an issue, than what’s wrong with Aloy and Seyka’s «rushed» romance? Perhaps that wasn’t the issue all along; the issue was perhaps that fans don’t like Seyka because she is the only romance option, and people are jealous. Then I ask again: do you really understand Horizon and respect Aloy’s story?

Fanshipping, fanart and fanfiction is one thing. But all in all, Aloy’s canon journey should be respected. These two years I’ve seen the majority of fans neglecting this side of Aloy, and pushing this narrative out of the picture, which also means Seyka has been pushed away. The danger with this message is: «we want gay characters, but not like this». And it even shows on Guerrilla, who has stopped promoting their queer characters, IN OUR TIME OF 2025!!

Should we not protect what we have and got in Burning Shores DLC? Instead fans complain, and wants other romances, and neglects Aloy’s queer journey by choosing NO?! How petty can one be, to not seperate your fanship with an actual queer representation because «it’s not good enough». This is what we have. And imagine what we can have if we unite instead of pushing it away and pretend it never happened.

And so what about ship wars? This is just as petty as neglecting. But I think the root of these wars is that we don’t respect each other, and because we all have different views on Aloy’s story. If you are reading this and already feel angry about it, it’s most likely because our views are different. Or maybe it’s because you know deep inside that I’m onto something, that you don’t want to acknowledge.

But if we can agree on anything, it should be about fighting to keep the queer representation in Horizon, rather than fighting among ourselves and complain so much that even the gaming developers stops promoting it.

[hypogryffin]

i cant believe i wasn't following u b4,,,,,ive just been silently scrolling through your blog for like a solid YEAR and just haven't even noticed????? n e ways what are tha thoughts on literally anyone in p4 being trans bc i live for that 🎤

the way my brain decided that this was asking for pronoun headcanons and did not reread to make sure that was what you were asking before drawing all of this…... well anyways

[carnivalls]

Killing myself a thousand times over. Do I want the setting of Good Intentions to be past based (fantasy greece meets the industrial revolution) or futuristic (fantasy greece meets itself after a stupidly ambiguous amount of years)

[meggydolaon]

Under-acknowledged fact about Grima is that she's supposed to be 20 or so (or however old Lucina is) years older than the Robin we play as. This means she is not only Evil Robin, but more distinctly MILF Robin. In this essay I will

[torchickentacos]

Genuinely so happy to see that Totodile made it into ZA! I haven't really consolidated my thoughts on the trailer yet (I feel like I still have more questions than answers about what the plot itself even is beyond 'make the city better' tbh?), but Totodile is there and Absol is there and that is genuinely enough to keep me excited

[spotaus]

Late Night quick thing (New Age Sillies)

Bad news: That joke post about including Reset + Orchid is definitely not canon. (I legit got sad thinking about Reset being in a universe where Orchid isn't- because their stories are so so intertwined- but Nightmare 100% would NOT risk the whole twins exploding Error's soul thing.)

Good news: This means I COULD include Kane (Reset's older brother who usually dies in timelines where Reset is born) and use it to develope his character a bit more! Also! Perhaps a Blue × Dream kiddo is finally in the stars for me to design?

[thanatologie]

but also i need you to also understand - as a follow up thought - that emmrich's been, essentially, a doting and supportive but at times struggling single dad since he was in his early thirties at this point, with what is also essentially an oversized toddler that he's handling and figuring out how to care for all by himself, and what has to be a somewhat sobering realization that the strict schedule he's had them both on to give manfred (and himself) a sense of order has stifled his growth all these years.

[pirefyrelight]

Its a weird feeling. I'm so close to having a custom pc, and all the research and bookmarking and learning about the fundamentals of this task being done on my ancient, life support necessitating laptop. My two core laptop. My laptop that can't no more hold a charge, nor a wifi connection. The laptop I spent hours at the library deciding on, that I told everyone to give me best buy gift cards for Xmas and birthdays for to buy it. I wasted so much time playing minecraft on this thing. And in her twilight moments she slowly but surely loads the pages I need to see to replace her.

Heres to another ten years wasting time instead of sleeping but this time on a rig with an entire terabyte of memory let's go

[thatonefreemanversefic]

Bad news gang :( This Freeman Friday is turning into a Cicero Saturday, and not in the fun double update way, but in the slow update way. I wanted to wrap up things tonight but the vibes are really bad for me rn (my therapy has been reschedule for the 4TH time in a row chat I am NOT doing all that great tbh) and tomorrow I will quite literally be busy all day. 6am to 10pm there is not a speck of time I will be able to slip away to write or anything, so uhh jumpscare I actually have things I do outside of fanfiction, crazy right?

TLDR; Update will be a day late for the sake of my mental health and busy schedule.

[unreal-unearthed]

“safe in his phantom embrace”

…yeah ahaha i’m fine :,)