#and our entire friend group chose me in the divorce lol

[hiraethwrote]

am i doing this right...

26. a scenario that you’ve replayed multiple times?

hehe there’s no right or wrong way, jelli mwaaaah thank you for stopping by

26. a scenario that you’ve replayed multiple times?

oh lord there’s many, chronic overthinker. but i’ll search my mind

it’s not necessarily a good one but it’s ingrained in my mind forever. i have only mentioned it briefly before, but i went through a rough friendship breakup in early february of this year.

disclaimer, i am over the situation as a whole, so i’m fine and all, but i won’t ever truly be over all the shit that was done to me yk. anyway

hea lore incoming: after my friendship break up, he had to block me on snapchat. his gf had a problem with him having me on snapchat, because unbeknownst to me, he had lied about a lot of things about me. like she didn’t know i existed (btw my bf knows everything about this situation so there’s no shady behaviour on my part, my ex friend just turned out to be a very mischievous and manipulative person)

anyways, i took it very hard bc he had lowkey manipulated me into putting a lot of value in our communication on snap (we were long distance best friends so it was the only place we communicated outside of discord). so after it all went down, we go two weeks with no contact — before I ACCIDENTALLY POCKET DIAL HIM ON INSTAGRAM OF ALL PLACES

YOU CAN IMAGINE THE PANIC IN MY BODY OMG THE SHEER EMBARRASSMENT WHEN I SAW HIS FACE POP UP I WANTED TO THROW UP

and that moment goes though my mind a lot……. i’ll never forget the panic i felt. i can’t ever remember being more frantic in my life, hands shaking and hyperventilating like BRO I DID NOT NEED THAT. universe just hated me sm. and on instagram of all places… god i still cringe and it’s been nearly 10 months

[withthebeatlesgirls]

What songs did Eric Clapton write for Pattie?

A lot! And unlike George, Eric had/has no issues when saying a song was about Pattie. Although some I believe he’s never publically said were about Pattie, but that’s probably more because no one has asked about those ones but they can be assumed to be about her. So I’ll be talking about all the confirmed and unconfirmed songs he wrote about her.

Layla (Confirmed)

The obvious one right? lol. The whole Layla and Other Assorted Love Songs album is dedicated to Pattie, although not all of the songs on it are written about her because some are covers and songs like Thorn Tree In The Garden were written by  Bobby Whitlock (who also helped Eric when writing some of the songs on the album)

Bell Bottom Blues (Confirmed)

“Once we met under the clock on the cobbled Guildford high street. He had just come back from Miami and had a pair of bell-bottom trousers for me – hence the track ‘Bell Bottom Blues” - Pattie

Eric talks in his documentary about how the lyrics came out of real frustrations with her refusal to be with him being like “What is that you want me to do? You want me to crawl across the floor to you?”

I Am Yours (Confirmed)

Most of the lyrics in this song are taken from the actual Layla and Majnun story, Nizami the writer of that story is even credited. 

 I Looked Away (Confirmed)

Basically about Pattie’s refusal, and despite loving her being a sin because she ‘belongs’ to someone else he’ll still love her til his very last day.

Keep On Growing (Confirmed)

Just another song on the Layla album.

Anyday (Confirmed)

This song is pretty underrated imo, it’s basically saying that despite Pattie telling him to ‘please leave me alone’ that he knows that anyday they’ll be together and in love.

Why Does Love Got To Be So Sad (Confirmed) 

Ah I love this song. And the lyric “I can’t keep from singing about you” is definitely true lmfao.

Pretty Blue Eyes (Unconfirmed?) 

I don’t think Eric has every said this song is about Pattie, but I’ve seen many people say it’s about her because obviously, Pattie has pretty blue eyes.

Wonderful Tonight (Confirmed)

Lol everyone knows this one. Basically, the story is that Pattie was taking too long to get ready, which annoyed Eric so he turned his annoyance into a tender love song.

Pattie would later say this about it:

“For years it tore at me. To have inspired Eric, and George before him, to write such music was so flattering. ‘Wonderful Tonight’ was the most poignant reminder of all that was good in our relationship, and when things went wrong it was torture to hear it.”

 Next Time You See Her (Unconfirmed) 

So as far as I know Eric has never said this song was about Pattie, but it does sound like it was written about her. Probably during one of their separations and maybe she was seeing someone else or was afraid she might have been.

Golden Ring (Confirmed)  

This was written about Pattie’s reaction and hurt to the fact that George remarried without telling her about it, and basically about the love triangle in general. I feel like this song really shows Eric’s insecurities, wondering if she’d be as happy to marry him as she was to marry George. 

Pretty Girl (Basically confirmed)

I don’t remember Eric ever talking about this song, but the fact that he says “you are the one I chose to make my wife” pretty much confirms it’s about Pattie because ya know that’s his wife. I adore this song, I feel like it shows how he really did love Pattie, this song is what I believe to be a moment of sobriety and clarity during the years of his addiction.

Man In Love (unconfirmed) 

This is another one where Eric hasn’t really commented about, but it’s also pretty safe to assume it’s about Pattie. I also think the lyrics “I used to be so sad, like a dog without a bone And then you gave me something baby I had never known.” is really fitting for their relationship because before him and Pattie got together he was pining for her like a dog without a bone. Also the lyric “I celebrate each time I realize you’re really mine” is also very fitting for him and Pattie because he wanted her for so long and now he has her hence the reason for celebrating that she’s really his now.

The Shape You’re In (Confirmed)

So Pattie mentions in her book that when Eric started drinking a lot Pattie started to do that as well because she wanted to be able to keep up with him and Pattie says how he cruelly points that out in this song.

The song is pretty messed up.  Out of all the songs written for Pattie, this is certainly the least flattering. The tone of the song definitely sounds very mean and that he’s just being a dick and making fun of her, but there’s a verse in the song that makes me question that.

“Now I'm not trying to get heavy with you. I'll mind my own business if you want me to. But I love you girl, I don't love no one else. I'm just telling you baby 'cause I've been there myself.”

Like the rest of the song is him being a jerk, but this verse doesn’t sound like he’s mocking her. He’s telling her she’s the only one he loves and wants to help because he knows what she’s going through. I just can’t understand it, if the motive for this song was just to mock Pattie then why have that there. I find this verse to be too thoughtful to fit with the rest of the song.

Behind The Sun (Confirmed)

Just like the Layla And Other Assorted Love Songs album, the entire Behind The Sun album is also dedicated to Pattie although he didn’t write every song on it. This was during a period where they were separated, Eric was utterly devastated and was even suicidal during this period. This song is really sad and depressing.

Never Make You Cry (Confirmed)

This song is really pretty, but also bullshit because he made her cry a lot.

Same Old Blues (Confirmed)

Basically just “I miss you and I swear I’ll treat you right plz Ily”

She’s Waiting (Confirmed)

I love this song, it often gets mistaken for being about the love triangle between him and Pattie, thinking this song is directed towards George, but it’s actually not it’s directed to himself. He’s basically admitting that he’s a shitty husband who doesn’t deserve her, and when she finds someone who is better than him his world is gonna fall apart.  

Tearing Us Apart (Confirmed) 

This song is about a group of friends Pattie had that he called “The Committee” and he believed they were coming between him and Pattie, probably because they told her that he was an asshole lmfao.

Needs His Woman (Unconfirmed) 

I’ve heard people say this was about Pattie a few times, but Eric never said it was I’m pretty sure. I wouldn’t be surprised if he wrote this after their breakup.

Old Love (Confirmed)

This was about their divorce, and that basically even though he knew their relationship had ran it’s course he still couldn’t let go because he loved her for so long and became used to that.

And I might have missed a few, but that’s all I know. 

[hamahsjournal]

My Struggle with Rejection and Vulnerability

I've had alot of friendships in my life, yet somehow here, right now I have none. It's a fact that physically hurts some days but 'it is what it is' as they say.

My very first friendship ever was probably my longest ever. I befriended twins in the Pre-K and we remained friends until the 8th grade, when I left our small school. I left school and slowly started hanging out with them less and talking to them less. It hurt, alot, at first, but we were naturally growing apart. I obviously didnt expect or want then to never make new friends but I would be lying if I said it didnt hurt when I'd see them on social media with other people. But I grew older, more mature and understand the natural distance that came between us.

What I cant forget and what will always hurt was my friend Aryn. Aryn and I because friends when I was in 5th grade. She was in 6th and had newly transferred to our school. I dont really know what brought us together but we were naturally drawn to each other and hit it off. We were absolute BEST friends! Like we texted all the time, hung out at every possible chance and we told each other everything, I really loved her.

She and another girl (who we'll get into later) stayed my best friends the when I moved away and still talked and everything. When my family and I moved back to my home town, Aryn and I had become slightly distant but nothing a few chats over coffee wouldnt fix. But little did I know Aryn had moved on. I would text her to hang out and she would agree then text back minutes before we out meet up time saying, for one reason or another, she couldn't make it. Then I would see her on social media that same night out with other friends. I was the backup friend, no longer a first priority, simply an option if a better one failed to come through. It hurt, alot.

Where our friendship came to a nasty end was the day after our mutual friend, Ashley's wedding. Ashley was at the time my best friend. I had known her a long time (as she use to date my brother, but that's another story for another time). Aryn her and I hung out alot. But as Aryn backed out of my life ashley was there for me and was a great friend. I was a bridesmaid in her wedding and we were really close. But the day after the wedding aryn posted a photo that destroyed our friendship.

You see, aryn had a fake Instagram (a finsta if you must *rolls eyes*) that I didnt follow but Ashley did. Aryn posted a candid photo of her and I at the wedding where I looked, basically terrible lol, and posted a rude comment directed towards me under it. I guess I must have blocked out what the comment was because, I genuinely cant remember it any longer. But trust me, it was grounds for divorce.

I was hurt and felt like my life long friend had secretly hated me and I never knew. All the times she canceled our plans made sense she never actually cared about me like I did her. I felt alone and fell down a hole of depression for a while.

Luckily, my friend ashley helped me alot with that! She helped me realize the problem lyed with aryn and not me. But soon our friendship too ended.

After Ashley's wedding she moved away and we both did our best to keep in contact, but us both being young adults we had busy lives that didnt always permit that. I still considered her my best friend though. What was the end of things was when she made a trip back to our home town and didnt tell me. In fact kept it a secret from me and my brother, who was her husband's best friend. The obviously didnt want to see us for whatever reason and ignored us. They continued to do this multiple times while posting on social media pictures of them out with other friends. Friends, who by the way, made their wedding hell. But again another story for another time.

Once again i was left feeling hurt and confused I didnt know what I did to deserve this. I always was the best friend I could possibly be to Ashely. Fighting and standing up for her when drama hit the fan during her wedding, I threw her a bachelorette party, I talked her through a break up. But here I was once again out a friend, spiraling down the dark tunnel of depression, I too often find myself in.

What pulled me out of the maze of depression I was in was when I went on a missions trip to Mexico. Now I've been going to Mexico for a lo g time, but never more than a week at a time, until this trip. I went down for three months. I worked in an orphanage and loved it! I met a boy who worked there who was a few years older than me and we instantly had an unspoken connection. I found myself really really liking him, but we were just friends and I wasn't about to loose another friend because of my dumb feelings.

It wasn't until my next trip down, where I stayed for eight months, that I realized I was head over heels in love with my friend. But I never said anything. Him, two other girls and I lived and worked together in this orphanage, always hung out and were best friends.

That was until during the Christmas season where one of our mutual friends (who was slightly obsessed with him) was away visiting family. He told me one night, that he liked me, like alot. He has for a long time and sees us having a future together. You can imagine how genuinely happy and excited I was! This was why i was here! I would fall in love get married and have a family, it was incredible! But, I didnt want to start anything while I was living in the orphanage, because he was living there too and we were working with kids, so we didn't want anything weird to happen. So we decided to just wait to see what happened in the future.

Then, our friend came home. She cornered me one evening in our kitchen and went off. Saying I was ruining our friend group, his and I's relationship was inappropriate, I was a bad example to the kids, I made her uncomfortable and it needed to stop.

I left the conversation, locked myself in my bathroom and resorted to an old coping mechanism I thought I had long left behind. I cut my hips and sides. Balling my eyes out heart broken I had ruined everything.

This began a chain reaction of events that are too lo g to explain now, but in the end it came down to this. He had to choose to be with me or be friends with her. Guess what he chose?

He chose her then had the audacity to tell me he loved me. I hated him. Well, I wanted to. But I also loved him much. After a couple months I returned home, broken hearted.

I'm still broken hearted, hurt and struggling. He posts about her now, their friendship (thata more than a friendship if you ask me), how great she is and how much he loves her. While I sit here having lost a boy I love and my friendship with both of them.

I'd never felt so rejected and hurt in my entire life, it destroyed me for a long time. He still texts me occasionally and I text back keeping the conversation friendly but that's all.

It's because of these event in my life that I struggle with the constant feeling of rejection and not being good enough. I'm always the second choice. Never quite good enough to be made a priority.

Maybe one day, someone, somewhere will change that for me. But that feels so far away.

Somedays I cope with the fee lo ding better than others. Some day I can go for a run, or draw, or mow the grass and feel better after ward. Others I feel enslaved to the depressing thoughts in my mind keeping me a prisoner to my bed and to the blade on my sides.

I'm hurt. Struggling and I fear rejection. Because of that I dont dare to make myself vulnerable to another person again.

[5hfanfiction]

Galaxies: Chapter 7 (Dance)

A/N

IMPORTANT NOTE, READ BEFORE PROCEEDING TO THE STORY

For those people who had read this story before the last update, I made the following changes:

First: 3 month world tour - 1 month Europe.

Second: I made a rough edit on chapters 1 and 2 as I’ve noticed how poorly it was written. Lol but yeah I think that’s the most significant changes for this fic.

Anyway, if you are still reading this, thank you and I only proofread when I have time.

—-

It was ten minutes passed nine as time had gone by unnoticed, yet again. Lauren’s mind was voided with thoughts, as her ears were ringing in silence, as if the laughter and music surrounding her was non-existent. It was a skill she had acquired when she was forced to join social gatherings. But unlike the past week where she was consumed with thoughts, that night it was empty, as if everything around her were fictitious beings —nothing around her was real, she wasn’t real.

She didn’t know how she ended up in a pub with people she didn’t know, and it didn’t help that she was completely shut-off from the group’s conversation. Every word uttered was foreign to her, so instead she took a sip of her scotch and examined the ice in her drink that pretty much summed up her whole existence —a cold object slowly melting in its warm surroundings until it infects it with its algid state.

Lauren was again brought back to reality as she felt a cold hand rested softly on her arm, she slowly glanced at it before her eyes landed its owner sitting beside her, “Are you okay? I’m really sorry about this. I told them about my plans but they were very persistent and I didn’t want to blow you off,” the young waiter whispered in her ear managing to lean closer. Lauren had then appreciated how sexy the girl’s French accent was, and it reminded her why she agreed to go with the group in the first place. She had to make sure she gets the girl home, and with her sulking it might not be the case.

“Yeah, it’s cool. I don’t mind, I don’t have any other plans anyway,” Lauren said with a sweet smile, deciding to up her game, “And It’s quite entertaining observing you guys talking, your language is exceptionally beautiful, especially when it comes from your mouth. And we still have all night,” Lauren said, leaning in closer to the girl, “to talk,” she whispered in the waitress’ ear before leaning back with a smirk plastered in her face. Lauren didn’t know if it was the alcohol or the fact that it was already in her nature to flirt. With Lucy it was different, as it wasn’t really the brown-eyed woman’s body she was after, but with other girls she was skilled and confident, like a lioness perfectly capable of attacking a weak prey, and whatever practice she had before­ it was working on the blue eyed girl, as Lauren felt the girl shiver from her previous attack.

It wasn’t after a few more glasses of alcohol that Lauren had felt her whole body heat up, a cue that it had already consumed her system. It didn’t help that she and the waitress had occasionally exchanged subtle touches, but it was enough to make her whisper “I think it’s time for us to talk at your place,” to the girl beside her earning a nod in agreement. The waitress had informed her that they could leave after her trip to the ladies room.  Lauren had paid for their tab and was preparing to leave until she had heard the familiar lyrics that had brought her back to a place she had dreaded.

“Tell me something, when the rain falls on my face How do you quickly replace it with a golden summer smile?

Tell me something, when I’m feeling tired and afraid,

How do you know just what to say, to make everything alright?”

The calm sound of the waves had blended with the acoustics of the song, it was soothing yet tantalizing as Lauren held Camila closely, with the younger girl’s chin rested on her shoulder. Lauren had guided them both, as each sway was accompanied by the ocean breeze. They had lost count on how many songs they had danced to, with both of their bodies pressed against each other, but both of them knew they didn’t want that night to end. Lauren then decided to break the silence between them, as she whispered the lyrics along with the song continuing to guide them both.

“I don’t think that you even realize,

the joy you make me feel when I’m inside your universe

You hold me like I’m the one who’s precious,

I hate to break it to you but it’s just the other way around

You can thank all the stars all you want but I’ll always be the lucky one…” Lauren trailed off, as the song continued playing.

“You know this could be our song,” Lauren said, adjusting her hold on Camila.

“Babe, you do realize that you’ve said that in every song we’ve danced to, right?”

“I know, but can you blame me? Every song tells a different story. It could be about just wanting to be with a person for a night or about meeting someone for the first time or wanting to be with someone for the rest of your life, or even having that entire story in one song,” Lauren exclaimed, feeling her girlfriend’s breathing. They had danced as if they were floating, forgetting their surroundings.

“So how does that connect with making all these cheesy ass love songs our songs?” Camila asked as Lauren managed to twirl her around before pulling her closer again.

“It’s because, I want all these stories with you, the good and the bad ones, even if it’s a song about  humps, well definitely a song about your humps, ” Lauren said, as she slid down her hand from Camila’s waste and playfully squeezed her humps causing Camila to squeal.

“You’re an ass sometimes, why’d you have to ruin the moment every time. I can’t believe we ditched prom just for you to sexually harass me!” Camila scoffed as she playfully removed herself from Lauren’s hold managing to push Lauren’s shoulder in the process.

It was the night of their senior prom, and both of them had just dropped by to take pictures with their friends before running off to one of orange county’s beaches. They didn’t even get to share a dance, managing to waste their parents’ money on their prom tickets. Since their school was one of the most expensive schools in the Newport coast area, their tickets’ weren’t cheap and their prom was held in a private resort.  So instead of spending one of the most memorable nights of their lives dancing with people they had spent four years of their lives with, they chose to cover their expensive outfits with sand, rolling around on the beach laughing like three-year olds —but it was indeed memorable.

“I’ll miss this, I can’t believe in a few months we’ll both be in different states,” Lauren whispered softly as her head was rested on her girlfriend’s chest. They had both managed to chase each other, circling around Lauren’s car and eventually landing on the sand until both of them had comfortably snuggled up, lying on the beach, “Do you think we could survive it?

“Survive long distance?” Camila asked, playing with Lauren’s hair.

“Yeah…” Lauren trailed off, pain evident in her voice. It was an emotional night for both of them, as she felt the heavy rise and fall of her girlfriend’s chest. They both knew they only had a few days left before Lauren was off to Uconn for her summer training. 

“I don’t think so, I know so. I know this sounds so overused and cliché, but nothing happens by chance, but I know that the universe had made us cross paths for a reason. I can’t guarantee that in those four years we’d spend apart that it would be perfect, because nothing is perfect, we will go through tons of shit, even if we end up in the same state or we’d be miles apart. It will always come to choices, but what I can guarantee is that I will always choose you, I will always choose us.”

“How can you be so sure about these things?” Lauren asked doubtfully resulting for Camila to release a deep breath.

“Our idea of love is misconstrued, because novels and movies portray it as a perfect entity wherein mistakes lead to cheating and divorce, where long distance isn’t ideal because fiction tells us that we have to be with the person we love 24/7 for it to become a real relationship, and it contributes to what relationships are now, disposable. Now, people have the tendency to change partners like they’re changing clothes.” Camila said, pausing as she felt a strong breeze brush through them, “Unlike before, people were forced to marry a complete stranger, someone who they don’t even give a shit about because they pretty much don’t have any options to choose from. But those people are better in keeping relationships because they work hard for it and eventually learn to love the person they were forced to be with.”

“Yeah, I think I get what you are saying,” Lauren said, “ we now have the advantage of meeting our soul-mates from the other side of the world, a lot of us are free to love anyone we want, yet our reason for breaking up or giving up on someone is I love her but she’s an hour away from me, imagine those couples who were separated because of the war before and yet end up being faithful to each other with the only thing that kept them going on were letters sent months apart, not even knowing if the other one is still alive. And here we are complaining, when we have messages that just literally take less than a second to arrive, and we can’t even keep it in our pants.”

“Exactly!” Camila exclaimed, causing Lauren to chuckle from how passionate her girlfriend was getting. “And I know we are better than those people, we’ve literally been through a lot together and even if we go old school and write each other letters, this pants, okay assume that I’m wearing pants right now, will never come off unless you take it off.”

“Ew, gross! That means you wouldn’t change clothes or shower for months? Lauren asked, jokingly.

“I’m so done with you!” Camila said pushing Lauren off her chest, only to be pinned down. “Get off  me, Lauren!”

“Nope, I’m sorry I’m just kidding and stop squirming, your mom’s probably going to kill you, and me if you ruin that dress,” Lauren said, still pinning her girlfriend on all fours. Camila eventually got tired of wiggling out of her girlfriend’s grip as she knew Lauren’s stronger than her, but Lauren was careful enough not to hurt her. “Are you sure you don’t want to come with me tomorrow? I’m sure Adam wouldn’t mind if you tag along.”

“Even if I’m dying to go with you guys, I can’t.  Besides my parents wouldn’t allow me, and it’s your opportunity to spend time with your brother. He’ll miss you more than I would.” Camila said causing Lauren to gasp feigning offense, the statement was also enough for Lauren to let go of her hold on Camila, rolling off her as she sat next to her instead. “I’m just kidding, love. You know I’ll miss you the most.” Camila reassured, propping herself up as she immediately hugged Lauren from behind, resting her chin on the older girl’s shoulder.

Lauren released a deep breath as she felt her girlfriend’s arms circled around her waist— it was a perfect night, the calming sound of the beach, the beautiful moonlight illuminated the ocean, and the bright stars, and for what felt like the millionth time, she had the love of her life beside her. It was one of the many moments they had shared, holding on to each other like it was their last. They were indeed perfect for each other, Lauren had thought.

“I think we should get going, I promised your mom I’ll drop you off before midnight,” Lauren mustered, breaking yet another comfortable silence they had shared in each other’s arms.

“Yeah, that would probably be a good Idea,” Camila responded as she was first to stand up, dusting her dress removing every possible grain of sand as fearing the wrath of her mother as Lauren had mentioned.

“I can’t believe your dad bought you a new car, a sports car in particular,” Camila said, once they had pulled out of the beach in Lauren’s new Corvette.

“Yeah me too, I was surprised to see it parked besides my old car, and I thought we had a visitor but then it had a huge ribbon on top of the hood with a huge ass note that said Hope you like your new ride to prom, love dad. I haven’t actually seen him for a week now, he’s been so busy at the hospital lately, and maybe it was his way of saying he couldn’t see me tonight.” Lauren said with a hint of disappointment.  

She had noticed how frequent her dad had stayed in the hospital taking continuous shifts, as if he already lived there. Yes, she knew that it was part of her dad’s job to take longer shifts, but something was different, he hadn’t missed an important event in her life before. But for the past months he would just come home to get more clothes when Lauren was in school. Lauren never questioned it, she didn’t even question the fact that both her parents couldn’t accompany her for her university tour. She just assumed both of them were busy saving lives, and for someone like Lauren it was enough of an excuse.

“I had fun,” Camila said, once they had arrived at her driveway.

“Me too,” Lauren said with a hint of sadness in her voice, it was always hard for them to part, and one of them would always text the other person with an “I miss you text,” seconds after they’d said their goodbyes. Their friends found it silly for how they couldn’t really get enough of each other, but for both them it was their way of showing their love for each other.

“See you in a few days, and have fun at your tour in Uconn, send me pictures, okay? Camila reminded leaning in closer to Lauren hugging her as if they wouldn’t see each other for years. They had stayed in each other’s arms for minutes before Camila pulled away first giving her girlfriend a passionate kiss and afterwards said “drive safe”.

—

“Ready to go?” A voice husked, awakening Lauren from her flashback.

“Huh? Oh, yeah, sorry. Let’s go,” Lauren mumbled, obviously flustered. She was again consumed by memories that haunted her for the past week. Something with that specific memory had gotten into her, but no matter how hard she had tried, she couldn’t seem to recall it. It was as if she had forgotten something important, and maybe it was the reason she felt empty, why she had woken up at the wrong side of the bed, why she had suddenly changed her approach towards her ex. But one thing was sure —the memory had left a huge lump on her throat, unable to be mustered towards her consciousness.

Once they had arrived at the girl’s apartment, they had devoured each other like hungry beast, not wasting anytime as the girl led them to her sofa caressing each other fervently. It was as if every touch was calculated, something had taken over Lauren’s body. But when they were about to get on the bed, it suddenly hit her, cold. Lauren froze in the middle of the heated kiss, all the intoxication and desire had instantly vanished, leaving a heavy ache on her chest like someone had shot her straight in the heart. “I have to go,” she mumbled, pushing herself away from the girl, before she stormed out of the apartment.