#and other things but we don't talk about that 🤪
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vorareromantic · 9 months ago
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wow. it really genuinely is always either the mommy issues or the daddy issues.
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dolene · 7 months ago
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GET BACK ON TRACK ; charles leclerc x reader
summary: after carlos's wedding announcement is everywhere and taking over your entire life, you decided to break the slump and getting back on track by moving on.
...★...
carlossainz55
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liked by yourusername and 5,523,925 others
carlossainz55 Carlos & Rebecca. 5.5.25
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username fuck. yncarlos shipper we lose
username We've been losing since day one, there is no winning. Only losing 😔😔
username MY SUN????? MY MOON???? Okay what kind of torture are you guys gonna get me for this week
landonorris happy for you, mate!
yourusername Happy wedding to the beloved couple!! I wish you the best years of love and a great future together ever after 💗
username NO Y/N DON'T PRETEND
username i feel sick
danielricciardo Congratulations, and don't forget to spare the wine! 😄
alex_albon Lily and I wished you both a joyful wedding and a happy life! Don't forget about Lando, though.
username another day another cry (for y/n)
charles_leclerc Congratulations to the happy couple! Glad to be there and watch the sweet moments unveiled.
pierregasly The two of you were looking so sweet together. I hope I can make a good uncle in the future 😁🤣
carlossainz55 It's far still away from that and you're already thinking of that is insane
lewishamilton Happy wedding day to the couple.
username google, play no ordinary love by sade
yourusername
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yourusername Rats street avenue
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username oh she's serving
sabrinacarpenter WOOHOO GOOO GIRLL
username This is the face of a woman who LIED but still slayed
username pls get a bf that's gon be better than him
alexconsani My name is not Alex Albon, but you know who could Thai-you-down-tnite😏
alex_albon I would never do that though 😂😅
alexconsani Understandable. if I had your girlfriend, I would never cheat on her either
luisinhaoliveira99 I wish I met you when I was still in France
username She flew right away to France because she know she's the realest
username SHE TURNED EMO 💀💀
username the impact of losing him is real
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yourusername
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liked by charles_leclerc and 830,934
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username No captions just a pure masterpiece
username after seeing charles liking this, my feelings said something so gossipy
username mother's slaying again
username funny how i remember yesterday's bangs are still short
username It's an extension btw
yslbeauty Stunning as usual ✨✨
gigihadid I miss Australia and the photo booth
charles_leclerc 🤪🤪
yourusername What are you even talking about
username What is this silly ass interaction
username since when did he even being serious
charles_leclerc added a photo to their story! · 2m
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TWITTER, 10 MINUTES AFTER:
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yourusername
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liked by scuderiaferrari and 428,695 others
yourusername Gossiping with my new friend
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username Um is it gossiping about the whole thing with Charles?
username if it's real idk how to even react
username she literally said "i'll snatch your ex teammate"
chloe_stroll That red dressss 🫨🫨
username SHUT UP FERRARI LIKING
username girl it's over, she really going out with charles
username NOOOOOOOOOOOO 💔💔💔
yourusername added a photo to their story! · 10m
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yourusername
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yourusername Feelin’ good
view all 5 comments
username OH NAWW IT'S REAL
username at least she moved on... (jumping off a burj khalifa right after)
username idk if i have to be happy or be depressed rn. but anyway congratulations for the HARD launch last night, enjoying it sm 💀🫶
alexconsani Ooooo Charles's gfffff
alex_albon I'M SAAAAFFFEEEEEEE
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bluesidez · 7 months ago
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GymRat!Miguel Part 8
content warning: fluff, a little bit of hurt/comfort, some mentions of food, 18+ so MDNI, thigh riding 😙, thigh fucking 🤪, public indecency??? exhibitionism???, katoptronophilia aka mirror sexy time (thanks for the word jelly 🪼), just overall a really good time
word count: 4.4k, not proofread (we're only gearing up to what I assume will be another giant chapter 😷)
Prev | Next ✩°。 ⋆⸜ 🎧✮ Masterlist
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GymRat!Miguel who does some sets of push-ups, sit-ups, and leg raises in place of the gym. You watch him while you wait for room service, encouraging him from the side. Your presence was especially needed during the sit-ups when you sit at his feet, holding them down and giving him kisses when sits up.
GymRat!Miguel who sings loudly in the shower after his workout. You have to answer the door with an apology as the server laughs at Miguel belting out Britany Spears.
GymRat!Miguel who finally decides to respond to his texts. He’s had enough time to cool off and your presence was like a calm breeze, kissing away at his skin.
He discards his empty plate, placing it back on the cart. You’re still chewing away at some fluffy pancakes, enjoying the views of the high-rise hotel as the default channel played soft jazz.
GymRat!Miguel who lays in your lap while you eat some fruit. He has his phone in his hands ready to type, but he opens his mouth, silently begging for you to feed him grapes and pineapple chunks.
He hums to himself happily when you comply, combing a hand through his hair. He felt so peaceful like this. Serene.
GymRat!Miguel who sighs as he opens the message app. Here we go.
Abuela 💕:
“Abuela I’ll call you tonight”
“And there will be no babies. Not now”
“There better not be!”
Pa:
“Gracias pa”
“I’m glad you were able to meet her”
“She means a lot to me”
“I can tell”
“Mijo you pack a big punch!”
“Uno más!!!”
“You got that from me 👍🏽”
“Sure did pa 😭”
Gabri 🤡🤏🏽:
“You’re such an instigator”
“It’s not instigating. It’s reporting 😌”
“‘It’s reporting ☝🏽🥸’”
“Shaddap”
“You think I’m letting a member of the robotics team bully me?”
“You have perfect pitch and play the saxophone”
“You’re not winning this battle”
“Aren’t you supposed to be entertaining my girl? 🤨”
“Direct this clown act to her”
“Not sure how she puts up with it but I’ll free her soon”
“Stfu”
“A real man would be doing OTHER things but I digress”
“Did you really have to send a pic”
“You hate me”
“It’s clear to me now”
“Anyway what’s this about Tyler punching things”
“OHHHHH”
“He got him good”
“Square in the face”
“A bloody mouth to match his nose”
“TWINEM”
“Good”
"Pa said he granted me the ability to punch"
“He can dream on about that”
“Because where tf is my strength 😒”
"He punched Tyler before"
"Your time will be soon"
"😕"
"Also Ik about Nancy cheating already"
"Tyler told me in high school"
"I didn't want to be the one to tell Kron"
"Ur better than me"
"I would have told him that after that punch"
"YOUR MOM IS A HOMEWRECKER!"
"That's not what that means but ok"
Dana:
“Does your bf know you’re lusting after others?”
“Not if you don’t tell 😙”
“….I don’t think I want to give you her number”
“You’re perfect for Gabri”
“You’re both unbearable”
“What’s unbearable is I’m not talking to your gf rn”
“It’s too many O’Haras”
“Too much testosterone”
“SAVE ME MIG’S GF”
“MIG’S GF SAVE ME!!!”
Dad….Tyler:
“It’s ok. For what it’s worth, I can tell that you had good intentions.”
“Gabri told me what happened”
“I apologize for acting out of order and punching your son, but I couldn’t let him disrespect my girlfriend and my mom. No matter how difficult she may be, I’m the one who should tell her about it. Not him.”
"I completely understand that. You did what you thought was right, and that's far more admirable than what Kron did."
"In another reality, you and Kron could get along. For now, I will aim for cordial. I will make sure that he apologizes to you, your girlfriend, and Conchata."
"I don't want an apology if it's not genuine."
"Let's move on from that. You said you wanted to make it up to me? I saw that you added more dates to the hotel. Thank you for that, you didn't have to."
"Yes! If you are willing, I would love for you and your girlfriend to meet with me. I actually arranged something for you, Gabriel, and your girlfriends. I want to hear your input before I finalize the details."
"Sure thing. Is this afternoon ok?"
"That's perfect. I'll see you then."
Ma:
Read: 11:10 AM ✓✓
“Ugh,” Miguel groans, shutting his phone off and closing his eyes.
You stop rubbing his hair and look down, “What’s wrong?”
Miguel grunts as he moves your hand to continue, “My mom wants me to come home. Not sure if I want to do that right now. Not unless I know she’s ready to be accountable for once, which I highly doubt.”
You hum in understanding, “She’s still your mom, though. You’ll have to see her eventually.”
“My mom or not, she had no right to talk to you the way she did,” Miguel said reaching his hand up to your face. “It was cruel and…strange coming towards you. She doesn’t know you. Not yet, anyway.”
It’s not like she was trying to know you, either. Miguel seemed to understand this in your silence.
“I have to go grab some clothes so she might just get her wish,” Miguel says, turning his head towards your stomach.
You look down at him, “You don’t have to. Today is my last day here.”
“Well, lucky for us, Tyler extended the stay for a few more days,” he grinned. He started to move your shirt to fondle your skin.
Your stomach twitched as his breath brushed your skin. He started to kiss along your front, head disappearing under your sweater. He hummed as he started to tug at your underwear with his teeth.
“Hey,” you say, watching his head moving around through the material. “Stop that and finish talking.”
You pulled your sweater up to reveal him, his teeth still holding the band of your panties and eyes like a cat that got caught.
He let the band go close to your stomach so it wouldn’t snap, “This visual is making me forget everything.” His eyes are heavy and wandering.
You look to where he’s looking to see that you’re essentially flashing him.
You drop your shirt in embarrassment, letting out a sound of panic.
“No, no, baby let me see.”
“No, you’re at such a weird angle.”
“All art must be viewed up close and personal.”
Miguel sat up from your lap. He watched as you huffed and pinched the neckline of your sweater, moving it for air.
"You're so confident from afar, but when I'm near you like this, you get so shy. Even in public, you can be so bold. It's just you and me here."
"It's just," you watch Miguel as he crowds your space. His mouth goes behind your ear to press his lips into your skin. "I don't know. It feels like...more when it's just us. More real."
"Does it not feel real when we're in public?"
Miguel sits back, eyes wondering to yours. There's a pinch in his eyebrows, so faint you almost miss it.
"It does! That's not what I mean."
"Then, what is it? Tell me. Talk to me."
"I want to do more with you."
"But?" Miguel holds your hands in his, stopping you from picking at the loose threads of the sweater. He rubs them with his thumbs, itching to pull you closer.
"But, when you look at me like that, I feel like I could pass out. I get overwhelmed and nervous. I don't want to say or do anything stupid. It gets harder to control myself. I feel crazy."
Oh.
Oh.
"Then there are moments when my brain fools me into thinking that you don't like me in the way that I like you. Moments when that girl from not so long ago comes back, ashamed of herself and her body. A small part of me that thinks you could date anyone else and you're settling."
Miguel takes a moment to process your words.
He takes a breath, then opens his mouth.
"You really don't understand how much you affect me, do you?"
Miguel pulled you in his lap, fed up with this charade.
You grip his shoulders, steadying your balance with how fast he grabbed you.
"Miguel-"
"I don't know everything that your last boyfriend did to you and I don't know everything that you've experienced because of your body. Baby, I don't even know what you've seen all this time to make you think you're not worthy of love and respect, but I'm here to squash it."
"I meant it when I said that I love you. I'll learn it in a hundred languages just to remind you. I'll even tattoo it on my forehead for you to be reminded of it every single time you see me."
"I don't think you need to go that far," you say, eyes warm.
"No, I think I should. Anything for you to understand me. Anything for you to see you like how I see you."
"Letting out my deepest darkest secrets here, but do you know what I did when we first met?"
You shake your head, curious.
"I had a dream about you that was so good, I fell out of my bed. Peter never lets me live it down."
"A sweet dream?"
"Now, you and I both know it was more than that. Two cold showers should answer your questions."
You hide your face in his neck, heartbeat drumming through you, "Did you really?"
"Hand to heart. I understand your feelings. I acknowledge them too, but I need you to understand mine as well. Trust me when I say that you are unbelievably sexy. I love you and your body. My eyes caught your appearance before I came to know your personality. Anybody would be lucky to have you, but I'm the luckiest because you chose me."
Miguel hugged you close and kissed your head.
"Now let's rewind. You said you feel crazy when you're close to me?"
You groan in his neck.
"Uncontrollable? Heated?"
"Miggy, stop."
"My girlfriend is head over heels for me," Miguel hummed as he rubbed his hands down your naked legs. "She wants to ruin me."
"No, I don't."
"She's still wearing my clothes with nothing underneath but her panties and is leaning all over me. Her thighs are around my waist and she just told me that she wants me."
"You put me here," you lean up and stare at him. Your cheeks were hot and your eyes were dewey.
"She's looking at me like she's upset, but now I know that her heart is going crazy. I want to kiss her."
"Then do it," you whisper.
The kiss is sweet, the taste of fruit and syrup still on your lips. You finally relax in his arms, body melted against his. His hands slip under your sweater, dancing over your back. Your skin is soft and warm, a blanket over Miguel's figure.
The time where you two connect extends deeper and longer. You let your hands venture further than the nape of his neck, roaming until you brush across his chest. Miguel's breath hitched as your nails raked his nipple, chest jumping at the impact.
You break for a second, wanting to get air, but Miguel leans back in, desperate. He's whining, groping your body all over. His noises go straight to your core, twitching above him. He matches your pace, dragging your hips across his, reveling in how fast your body was reacting to him.
When he leans back, there's a string of saliva connecting you two. He's breathing hard as he watches you.
"Can I take this off? Please," Miguel grips the bottom of your sweater, eyes pleading.
You bite your lip and slide the sweater over your head, dropping it to the bed. You bring your hands over the top of your chest, arms framing your breasts.
You can't look Miguel in the eyes, too shy, "Is this fine?"
Miguel's eyes almost turn as he watches you, so shy but so seductive. He reaches out to cup your breasts in his hands, groaning when they plush through his fingers.
"You're so," Miguel rubs his thumbs across your nipples, enjoying you twitching and gasping in his hold. "Fuck."
His gaze burned into you, hungry as you lapped his tongue around your nipples. You let out a whimper when you feel him pull your skin in, mouth hot. It doesn't beat his pleased hum, voice like a man finally getting relief.
He massages your vacant breast, movements getting harsher. His grip is like a vice making it harder for you to second-guess yourself.
You hiss and rake your hands through his hair, "B-baby, be careful."
"Lo siento, mi amor," Miguel says, kissing across your areolas. "'M sorry."
You find your breath, fighting to steady your voice, "You're on me like we didn't just do something earlier."
Miguel paused and placed his cheek on your chest, "Baby, I'm a virgin and a man, not a prude. With practice, I could go all day."
The thought of that has you tightening your legs around him, hips stuttering. Miguel shifts to pull you over his left thigh.
"Does that excite you, baby?" Miguel smirks.
You close your eyes and nod, hips rolling over his thigh, keening high as he hikes his thigh closer to your sex and grips your waist. His muscles feel so good against you, the sounds getting wetter and wetter with each swipe.
"God, you're so pretty like this," Miguel sighs. "My gorgeous girl."
Your movements are becoming more frantic, Migiuel's voice in your ears spurring you on. He was sucking into your neck, growling as you scratched against his shoulder blades.
"That's right, baby. Keep going. Use me to get off," Miguel helped your hips keep a steady pace, pulling at your briefs to a makeshift thong. The tightness of your underwear combined with his thigh and his voice sends you into overdrive.
"Miguel!" you sob, hands gripping his hair. Your body trembles as you squeeze your thighs around him, cunt pulsating around nothing but your underwear, release leaking onto his leg.
Miguel cooed as you dropped your weight against him, body limp and hips fluttering with aftershocks. You panted as you kept your head on his shoulder, willing yourself to calm down.
"Are you ok?" Miguel asks, kissing your temple, your ear, your cheek. He feels you nod into his skin, blissed out.
"I like how you called me the needy one and you're the one who came three times today," Miguel mumbled, laughing as you swatted at his pec.
"I already confessed what you do to me. This shouldn't be shocking."
"Didn't say that. 'M just happy you feel more comfortable around me. It's what I want." One last kiss to your face seals his joy.
You lift up on shaky knees, hands holding onto Miguel for dear life. Your thighs were still shaking and your underwear was ruined. Miguel's cock twitched at the essence that seeped onto his leg, watching as sticky lines dragged from his skin to yours.
He grabbed you by the waist with one hand and wiped at your slick with another.
He's about to swipe at it with his tongue until you stop him.
"Miguel! Don't do that," you say, flustered.
"What? I'm just enjoying the fruits of my labor," he pouts as you grab some napkins and clean off his hands and thigh.
"So close to eating you, yet so far," he sighs miserably. "One day."
You ignore him and look down at his erection, taking a knuckle and lining the side. It was your first time really paying attention to him down there, now that you weren't distracted by his advances.
"What about you?"
He twitched as you walked along his clothed shaft, pre-come leaking through the fabric.
"As much as I want you to continue, we have to get ready for today," Miguel jerks as you continue your ministrations with a pout on your face. "And, I need condoms if you want to take this any further."
"Not even a blowjob?" you peer at him with your deer eyes again.
Miguel took a deep breath, "I was right. You are trying to ruin me."
GymRat!Miguel who lets you know that Tyler wants to meet you both after you both have changed clothes for the day. Something about a surprise.
"I love surprises!" you say turning to Miguel with a smile on your face. "As long as it's nothing like last night. I think it'll be ok."
Miguel matches your smile and presses his lips to yours.
GymRat!Miguel who stops at his home briefly, trying to get in and get out. He manages to fill up his travel bag, drop off his laundry, and give Gabriel a heart attack all before his mom notices he's there.
"Where are you going?" Gabriel asks with his hand over his heart, headphones lopsided around his neck.
"None of your business, nosy."
"Uh, it kind of is my business. You think you're grown when you're really not."
Miguel rolls his eyes. He didn't really want to tell Gabriel, but sometimes he couldn't say no to him.
"We're going out to see Tyler. He has a surprise for us. He also said he arranged something for us including you and Dana."
"Oh shit! Ok. And if mom asks where you are?"
"Tell her I'll come by tomorrow. I'm spending the next few days with my girlfriend."
"Alrighty," Gabriel sing-songs, placing his headphones back on his head. "You kids be safe. Don't scare my girl away."
Miguel smacks Gabriel across the head and runs out the door before he can catch up.
GymRat!Miguel who just laughs at your face while you frantically unlock the car to let him in.
"Baby, what's wrong?" you ask, voice in a panic.
"A string bean is trying to attack me," he responds, giggling as Gabriel runs out of the house.
"I'm getting you back for that you oaf!" Gabriel yells as Miguel backs out of the driveway. He stops his anger to wave at you, which you return with a sweet smile.
"Baby, you're encouraging him."
GymRat!Miguel who guides you through the doors of a cafe that Tyler recommended. He sticks out like a sore thumb with his stark white hair and light clothing. The only semblance of color on him was his silver jewelry.
He sat there, typing away at his phone, oblivious to the people around him who found familiarity in his form.
"Dad," Miguel said, the word funny on his tongue. He tried to make an effort to refer to him as his father in public, something Tyler appreciated greatly.
"Son!" he got up and engulfed him in a hug, giving you a softer version afterward. "It's good to see you both."
"It's lovely to see you again as well, Mr. Stone," you say, giving Miguel a smile when he pulls your chair out for you. "Thank you so much for thinking of us after all that's happened. Thank you for paying for my stay as well, the hotel is very lovely."
"Anything for Miguel's loved ones," he smiles in a way that has a hint of Miguel. You feel better going into the rest of this meal.
GymRat!Miguel who almost chokes on his coffee before Tyler can finish his sentence.
"A yacht?!"
"Is it too much? I can do something else to your liking," Tyler frets, wiping his hands on his slacks. "I'm not sure what all kids your age like nowadays."
"I've never been on a yacht. so I don't even know how to react," Miguel responds.
The two of them are sporting the same deer-in-headlights look.
"I'm sure it would be a great experience for all of us. If everyone doesn't mind, I'm sure we can get together and have a great time," you say, helping the two of them out. "Something nice to start the summer off."
"That's great! I will have everything ready by the beginning of next month then," Tyler says, mood lifting immediately. He was a lot like a golden retriever. "With that in order, I'd like to grant you this."
He takes his wallet out, reaching in to grab a card.
As he slides it across the table, your eyes grow big.
It's a black card with T. Stone pressed across the bottom.
"What's this for?" Miguel asks, staring at the card with building curiosity.
"You all need clothes for the trip, don't you?" Tyler asks. "And I'm sure you need more clothes to wear this week. Please take this, I don't mind. I trust you not to go overboard. I'll let you know when to give it back."
Miguel took the card in his hands, the weight of it heavier than any of his own.
"I guess it's time for a shopping spree," Miguel said, a smile growing on his face.
GymRat!Miguel who drives you straight to the mall. The windows are down as you both laugh and sing to the song on the radio. Miguel wishes he could record this moment, but for now, he dials it back to replay in his memory.
GymRat!Miguel who is happy to carry your bags and encourages you to buy more. Whenever you start to feel like you've gone overboard, he just whispers "black card" in your ear like a devil on your shoulder.
GymRat!Miguel who convinces you to walk around the name-brand stores. He did have Tyler's card, but he was also thoroughly watching what you gravitated towards. He locked away so many gift ideas for later.
GymRat!Miguel who joins you in the mirror of a shades shop. The both of you take pictures with coordinating glasses and you giggle as Miguel makes silly faces in some of them.
GymRat!Miguel who becomes your doll as you pick out outfits for him. He's smiling down at you as you put different shirts up to his body, mumbling to yourself as you make decisions. So pretty.
GymRat!Miguel who waits while you try on some clothes, giddy whenever you show him a new outfit. You managed to find clothes that coordinated with his and you're super excited about it.
"Close your eyes!" you yell through the door.
He does so and listens for you to walk out. After you take a while, he opens his eyes a little.
"Baby, no peeking," you chastise.
He huffs and waits a little longer.
"Ok. 1, 2, 3, open!"
His eyes land on you in a dress that hugs your curves like no other. Your chest fills out the top perfectly and seeing your stomach through the front is driving him mad.
"Do you like it?" you turned around, giving Miguel a grand view of how your ass was sitting in the dress.
"Do the dressing rooms have a time limit?"
You blink at him owlishly, "No? Why?"
GymRat!Miguel who drags all of your bags and you back inside of the dressing room with lightning speed. As soon as he locks the door, he's attached to your lips, kneading at your ass and hips.
You gasp in his mouth, shocked at how fast he's moving.
"Miguel, what- oh," you sigh as he leans down and pulls your dress up, face buried in your neck.
"You look so good, mi amor. I can't help it."
GymRat!Miguel who almost cums when you pull his dick out. Your eyes grow along with his erection, watching as he twitches in your hold. You've never taken anyone this big and from your hesitance, Miguel can gather this much.
"We don't have to do anything. In fact, you don't have to do that here," he pants.
"You mean take you down my throat?" you ask, running your thumb over his head, watching in awe as liquid seeped out. Miguel bit his hand to quiet his moans. "I'll wait until we're somewhere more private and less noticeable that I'm on my knees for you."
Miguel looks at the open space under the dressing room door, "Yeah that's probably for the best."
GymRat!Miguel who places you in front of him, both of you facing the mirror. Your dress is bunched up and Miguel is rocking his cock in between your thighs.
He's bent down, biting lightly on your shoulder so that he doesn't shout. Your thighs were so warm and plush against him and his pre-cum was spewing out of him like a fountain.
"You feel so fucking good, baby," he moans a little too loud after a few minutes.
GymRat!Miguel who watches you in the mirror. Your tits were so close to slipping from the top of your dress, the impact from his hips jerking your entire body. He grabbed at both of them, watching as you moan at the contact. His slaps got louder and louder, milky fluid running down your legs.
GymRat!Miguel who is overcome with need when you turn and run your tongue across his earlobe. He convulses as his release spurts across the room, landing on the mirror. He grips your hips and breathes hard into your skin, the tempo of his heart moving quick.
You pat his head and praise him, heavy eyes following your hand as you rub his tip that's still rubbing through your thighs. He whines, sensitive, but not moving away from you.
GymRat!Miguel who wipes you down carefully with some wipes you have in your purse. Luckily you both haven't ruined yet another pair of underwear.
He kisses you softly when he finishes, little confessions of love traveling from his lips to yours.
GymRat!Miguel who checks the dressing room one last time, making sure he's gotten any evidence of his removed from the area. Your green dress is in his arms and you've changed back to your outfit.
The area is clean, but there are fresh hickeys on your neck, something he got carried away with.
GymRat!Miguel who walks out like nothing happened. You on the other hand, hand over some extra clothes you didn't like to a worker in slight embarrassment. He eyes you both with a look of horror.
GymRat!Miguel who feeds you Auntie Anne's in the crowded food court. You hum happily after each bite. He dusts cinnamon off the corner of your lips with a smile.
GymRat!Miguel who moves from dusting to leaning across the table to lick the crumbs off when a table full of guys keeps eying you.
"What was that for?" you asked, oblivious to the hound dogs around you.
"Nothing. I just love you, baby."
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dividers by: @plutism 🩵
a/n: I got a very useful lesson on condoms and BJs while writing this chapter. It won't ever be applied to this fic, BUT it was still kinda fun nonetheless.
HOPE YOU ENJOYED!! Leave a like, a reblog, and COMMENTS if you did!!! 🩵
taglist: @ghost-lantern @miguelhugger2099 @slushycoookie @emelie-s-h @lake-lili
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hwaslayer · 5 months ago
Text
love you in slow motion (psh) | four.
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♡ spotify playlist | series masterlist ♡
—summary: seonghwa will go through hell and back for you, as long as he can continue to see that smile on your face. because to him, that smile feels like a rainbow after the rain, thewarmth of the sun on a winter day. because to him, you’re more than just his bestfriend—you’re love. even though everyone seems to see that except you.
—pairing: park seonghwa x f!reader
—genre: (18+ - minors dni) bestfriends to lovers | fluff, angst, eventual smut
—word count: 10k
—chapter warning: cussing/mature language, alcohol consumption, intoxication, club scene!, twerkin buns at the clurrrb 🤪, kissing/making out, quick rundown of oc's history with mingi, physical altercation, mention of small injuries/wounds (lip cut), arguments, crying, the silent treatment 💀, hints of a hookup, oc x seonghwa just being a mess per usual sorry 😫 lol
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"Are you still riding with me and Joong to the club?" Seonghwa puts your call on speaker while he sits in the passenger's seat of Hongjoong's car.
"Yeah, if I can."
"Can we head over then?"
"Sure. I'm still getting ready."
"We figured." Hongjoong chuckles in the driver's seat, turning into a lot. "What do you want from Egg House?" Seonghwa inches the phone away from his face when you squeal loudly and clap.
"Double egg toast, please!"
"Okay. We'll be there in about 30 minutes or so."
"Thank you!" You hang up the call first and Seonghwa lets out a breath, slouching further in the seat.
"It's so easy to please Y/N." Hongjoong laughs, finding a spot in the opposite end the lot closest to the shop.
"Sometimes."
"San ever tell you about their dinner?"
"Not really. Y/N did. A bit. She was being kinda weird about it, actually."
"Hm." He hums, figuring if it was gonna come from someone, it would be him. "That's probably because they talked about you."
"Me?" Seonghwa furrows his brows in confusion. "What about me?" No wonder you were being so weird about the topic at the aquarium. You couldn't tell him the full story, even though Seonghwa wished you would've. It'd make things way easier.
"What do you mean 'what about you?'" Hongjoong laughs as he heads to the self-checkout area to order. "These unspoken feelings, that's what."
"What did San say?"
"He asked if you two had anything going on with each other."
"Why is that a question when there clearly isn't?"
"Mm, well.." Hongjoong's response has a drip of sarcasm that has Seonghwa
"He didn't have to do that."
"He just didn't wanna get in between anything, of course he had to." Seonghwa is silent and he's biting his tongue because even though he has a rebuttal ready to slip— he's not entirely sure why he'd be defensive and fight back about it.
Hongjoong and San were right. It's not like everyone wasn't aware. The only person who seemed to be was you.
"I don't know what Y/N said. But whatever it was.. was enough for San to just back off." 
"He shouldn't give up on her."
"Him or you?" Joong laughs. "I mean they're still going to be the same. Good friends. I don't think anything was lost. They're probably both comfortable this way, too. Maybe that's just how it's supposed to play out." Joong shrugs. Which, it isn't much of a surprise to Seonghwa when he hears this, especially when you started talking about the potential of ruining things—
♡ FLASHBACK
"As friends. Like we always were." You tug on his wrist. "Hypothetically speaking, if we were to date, would that ruin things between us?" Seonghwa swallows the lump in his throat before shaking his head.
"Why would it ruin things between us?"
"I don't know, because we've always known each other like this. As bestfriends. It could be a dangerous thing, right? Cause we'd know too much about each other or whatever." You look up at him, and he locks his eyes with yours. He wishes he could say everything and nothing at once— but he sticks with the latter, his own example of keeping everything at bay. 
"I truthfully don't think it'd ruin anything."
"B-because I feel like it would and that's why I'm just letting things be with San."
"You sure that's it? Cause I feel like you're asking for a different reason, and not for San in particular."
♡ END
"Hate when you do that." 
"Hate when I'm right and you're wrong.. again?" Seongwa finishes plugging in his order and yours before checking out.
"I got it since you're driving today." Is all he responds before snatching the receipt.
"More gas money for me." Hongjoong snickers, plopping onto a high stool off to the side of the restaurant to wait for the food. 
"Did San say anything else to you?" Joong shrugs and shakes his head.
"Nah. But, he seems to be the same."
"Gotta talk to him." Seonghwa mainly mutters to himself. He just wants San to be okay because he didn't want this idea of you and him getting in the way [despite his feelings]. That was never his intention. But before he can fall into a rabbit hole with his thoughts, his name is being called and a bag full of food is being pushed his way. Joong is already on his way to the car, unlocking the doors to hop in and drive off to your place with a quickness— especially because he was hungry.
When they arrive at your place, they pass through the house to say their hello's to Yaya with Seonghwa handing off the extra sandwich he remembered to buy for her. She happily thanks them before waving them off, telling them that you're probably still getting ready in your suite.
"Hey!" Seonghwa knocks and yells. "Are you decent or whatever?"
"Yeah! Come in!" He hears from the other side just as he tugs on the doorknob. Walking in, he notices a few pieces of clothing scattered along your bed and couch, with you head deep into your closet.
"The hell are you doing?"
"Finding an outfit, what does it look like?" Your response is mumbled as you dig deep into the depths of your closet to find that black cotton mini skirt and a few tops. "Got it!" You hold up a bodysuit and a regular tank in the same color. "Body suit or tank?"
"How the hell are you gonna pee?" Hongjoong asks mid-chew. "Unbuttoning that coochie holder while drunk is crazy."
"You're sick, Kim Hongjoong."
"Nah, tell me. How is that gonna work?" Seonghwa silently takes out your sandwich and plops next to him on the couch.
"He's got a point. I'm not going into that bathroom to save you."
"Ugh." You groan, tossing the bodysuit aside and settling for the tank. "I'll figure out the rest later." You plop next to Hongjoong's free side. "Thank you for the food." You smile over at them.
"Hwa bought it." Hongjoong's eyes are glued to the TV. 
"Thank you, pichu."
"Mhm." Seonghwa responds from his end. 
"Why are San and Woo going separately?"
"San has to help his uncle with something and it might run a bit long. Woo offered to go with him so he wouldn't be alone."
"Mm." You hum. "Hope it doesn't go long."
"Aw. You miss Sannie?" Hongjoong playfully pouts and you hit him on the bicep.
"You're so fucking mean to me." Joong laughs loudly when you continue to whine, Seonghwa contently eating away while watching the show.
"You guys good or what?"
"Yeah, I just want all of us together."
"We will be, don't worry." Seonghwa chimes in and passes you your food. "Eat. I know you'll need like 500 hours to get your makeup and hair done." You glare at him before picking up the sandwich and digging in. You, Joong and Hwa continue to talk amongst each other while watching the TV before you gather the strength to finally get ready for the night. You turn on your bluetooth speaker, blasting your playlist while you get dressed and get your makeup going. Seonghwa has taken a few pregame shots with you in between, now sipping on a canned cocktail to keep him going while you finish up your makeup and hair. You take one more look at yourself in the mirror, satisfied with the oversized black denim jacket, mini skirt, tank and knee high heeled boots you threw on. Your makeup was simple, but enough to pop.
"Damn." Hongjoong teases, playfully checking you out and flattening his brows with two fingers while Seonghwa rolls his eyes. But, he has to say— he's fucking dying inside because of how fine you look tonight.
So fucking beautiful, and Seonghwa wishes he could have you all to himself.
"Go away." You laugh, walking through a cloud of perfume. "I'm ready!"
"About time." Seonghwa teases. "You look good." He breaks contact as he shuts off your bluetooth speaker and is the first to head out the door.
"Thanks, pichu." You shut off the lights and lock your door. "Do you have the bottle?"
"Make sure to hide that shit in the car, I'm not getting pulled over." Hongjoong says, unlocking his car. You hop into the backseat and tuck the unopened soju bottle aside— keeping it safe until you get to the club.
It's a 20 minute drive before Joong is circling the streets to find a good spot. When he finally gets lucky and finds one just a block down, he reverses into the spot flawlessly before shutting off the car and giving off a deep sigh.
"Have at it." He says, texting San to find out his whereabouts while you and Seonghwa continue to pregame some more and finish the bottle. The alcohol is hitting you quickly tonight, the soju being the cherry on top. Joong tells you San and Wooyoung have parked nearby, giving you all the greenlight to meet them halfway and walk together to the club.
You [drunkly] scream loudly when you see the two; running into their arms and letting them swing you around. You feel happier when you're all together, excited for what the night has to bring. You cling onto Seonghwa without realizing, the group behind you two as you walk side by side while engaging in conversation.
"Seonghwa! Why would you say that!" You and Seonghwa laugh loudly while walking down the street to the club. San can't help but divert his attention to you two ahead; watching as you naturally joke around, laugh and playfully bicker. You cling onto Seonghwa and continue to attach yourself to his hip, and the reality settles for San even more.
He is sad, but it's clear this is where you're supposed to be.
Seonghwa continues to tell you his story, leaning in to tell you delicate details even as you fall in line for the club. San realizes things surely haven't changed, because for you and Hwa, all you see is each other. You both don't ever purposefully make anyone feel left out, but at the end of the day, Hwa was always going to prioritize you and vice versa.
This is your own world and San only plays a little part in it. And that's okay. That's completely okay. You deserved to be happy and that's all he wants for you. All he wants for Hwa.
When security finally checks your IDs and lets your group in, the club is packed from wall to wall and you're having to hold Seonghwa's hand while navigating through the crowd. Hongjoong is behind you, gripping at the belt loop of your skirt to help lead the other two trailing him.
"Aye, over there!" Hongjoong tugs on your belt loop and points at the free bartender towards the other end of the club nodding with his lips while nodding. You take the hint and get Seonghwa to navigate to the free area. Once you're there, you feel like you're able to breathe, being able to spread your arms and move around freely.
"Let's go get some drinks from the bartender over there, it isn't busy." Seonghwa points to the small bar area towards the back end. Your group follows, instantly asking the bartender for a few shots of tequila, whiskey, whatever each chose as their own poison. 
The shots are taken to the neck, and before you know it, you're dancing away on the dance floor with your friends. Wooyoung manages to grab a few dances from cuties nearby, dragging San along to cheer him up and find someone he could possibly have fun with. But, amidst all that and all the numbers he manages to grab, he still finds himself looking for you so he can at least have a dance. 
"Y/N?" San comes to you, cheeks tinted red as his hand  caresses at his jaw. 
"What's wrong, Sannie? Are you okay?" You look up at him with those eyes, your hand on his bicep. You're both clearly drunk out of your minds but jesus, is he having trouble containing himself. 
"Y-yeah." He hiccups. "I just wanted to ask if you'd dance with me?" You giggle and nod.
"Let's go!" You grab his hand and take the initiative. At some point the crowd builds and you're separated from your group— Wooyoung floating somewhere out in the chaos, while Hongjoong and Seonghwa are pulling further and further away. You continue to dance with San though, enjoying every moment and having fun while with him. He keeps up with your rhythm, holding you close but making sure you still have enough freedom to move however you want, have space however you want. But, you continue to work on him and dance along to the music, forgetting any worries for the night.
You dance with San for a good chunk of time before you start searching for Seonghwa, who is no longer nearby. You catch wind of him, but your body decides this is the perfect time to break the seal.
"I need to go to the bathroom." You turn to San and tippy-toe to his ear.
"You okay? Want me to come and wait?"
"No, I'm okay. I'll be back." You give him a small reassuring smile before rushing off to the bathroom and waiting in the tiny line that had formed outside the door. You're in and out within 5 minutes, washing your hands and patting your face down with how stuffy the club had gotten. After handling your business in peace, you realize that Seonghwa and Hongjoong are even more separated than you thought when you exit the bathroom— no longer being able to spot them on the main dance floor, especially due to being inebriated. You finally find Wooyoung and San together, tugging on Wooyoung's sleeve to grab his attention.
"Where's Hwa?"
"Iono!" Wooyoung shrugs. "Last time I checked he was somewhere over there with Joongie." He nods in the far back corner behind you. You give Wooyoung's arm a squeeze to thank him before pushing your way through the crowd towards the potential Hongjoong and Seonghwa spot. When you get there, Hongjoong is definitely nowhere to be found, but Seonghwa is talking to some girl. He's leaning in towards her ear in order for her to hear him, and she laughs at whatever the fuck he's saying. It lowkey kinda irks you, even though you have no reason to be feeling that way. You should be happy Seonghwa is putting himself out there and flirting away at the club. 
Not feeling jealous or envious in the least bit that she is occupying his time and space.
"Hey." You come up to him just as she giggles and playfully flips her hair, turning on her heels to walk away. She gives him one last look before she sways her hips and continues walking towards her friends, all of them squealing over the encounter in the middle of the club. "I see you've been busy." He shrugs.
"That's the girl I met. Makayla." You subtly roll your eyes and tap his chest.
"Okay, well I've been looking for you." You kinda pout.
"What's wrong?" He tilts his head.
"Nothing, I just wanted to hang out with you and I couldn't find you for the longest time." He laughs.
"You were dancing with Sannie, weren't you?" He taps your nose. He says it like it's a light, teasing joke, but deep down, Seonghwa had to step away and get outta that spot. He's not gonna lie, he is relieved you're finally looking for him and finding him. 
"So?" He laughs.
"Well, you found me? Stop pouting. We came here to have fun and you're gonna be with me all night." He gently runs a finger down your bottom lip that is still poking out in a pout. 
"Where'd Joong go?"
"Bathroom." 
"Let me grab San and Woo—" Seonghwa tugs at your hand just as you're about to turn, a small frown on his face. As you look at him, not only do you realize how drunk you still are, but you can also pick up on how drunk Seonghwa is, too. His eyes are red and glazed over, cheeks also tinted with a rosey hue. 
Which, with the way he's looking at you, can't be a good thing. 
This won't end well.
And you truly do not care right now.
"Uh-uh, I thought you wanted to hang out for a bit. Dance with me." He says, pulling you flush against him while his teeth subtly nibble on his bottom lip.
"Hwa." You get all shy and unlike yourself, most definitely from the alcohol and the way he's looking at you up and down. You let him keep you close, beginning to dance against him and go with the beat of the current song blasting through the club. 
To set the record straight first and foremost— it's not like you haven't danced with him before. You have, and those times have been careless, free and fun. You didn't have a care in the world, Seonghwa didn't. It wouldn't last because it was harmless fun before you were onto the next and brushing it off like it was any ordinary thing between you two.
Because it was.
Tonight, it isn't. The air is different, and the energy between you two is supercharged; strong, an incredible pull to each other. The air is extra thick and like no other you've experienced with him. You can't really explain it right now, but with recent events, you just know you want Seonghwa.
Just like he wants you.
So you dance, and you dance. The two of you have pushed to the farthest corner of the club that Hongjoong never seems to return to Seonghwa [or maybe he did and didn't wanna bother] and the two of you are left in your own little world. He's still keeping you close, a tight grip on your hips as he feels every inch, every move against him, doing his best to keep up with the rhythm, you.
And god, is it turning you on.
You turn to face him when the song transitions into the next, finding that Seonghwa can't take his eyes off of you. He stares through his hooded lids while he rests against the metal railing, hands still at your hips while your face is only inches away. You watch as his eyes shoot down to your lips, back up to your eyes as if he's begging, pleading, you to make the first move. Because that will be the confirmation he needs— that will open up a whole new box that Seonghwa had been waiting to open, break the lock to a door he had been waiting to walk through. But also, he's too scared to make the first move. Too scared he'd be overthinking, that you're just drunk and you wouldn't mean it—
Suddenly, the impact of your lips crashing into his quickly pulls him out of his thoughts. Instead of breaking away at that moment, the kiss instantly becomes heated, deep. And Seonghwa has to forcibly pull himself off of you because even though he wants this so, so badly, it'll ruin everything if you truly didn't mean anything by it.
"What're you doing, Y/N?" He breaks away and leans towards your ear. His voice is husky and deep, loud enough to barely be heard over the music.
"I can't kiss you?"
"Not if you don't mean it." He bites onto his bottom lip when he pulls back to look at you, hands still resting on your waist.
"Who said I didn't mean it, Hwa?" You say in his ear, shivers running down his spine when he feels your lips graze your jaw. He probably should think about this, really think about this, but he can't. He's just as fucked up as you are, and he's feeling a bit selfish, a tad bit horny. You're positioned in between his legs looking beautiful as ever even under the dim club lights.
He can't help himself.
He cups your cheek as he pulls you back in, kissing you with so much more fervor. He hears you let out a content sigh in between kisses, pressing your body up against him as you grip the sides of his shirt.
"Driving me crazy." He says, pulling back and letting his nose lightly glide over yours. The both of you are slightly panting, lips swollen from all the intense kisses just shared. You'd do it over and over again, though. And if it were up to you, you'd take this home to explore a little further.
You want Seonghwa.
"Am I?" You continue to tease.
"Y/N." He gives you a look. "You have no idea what you do to me." His voice is still husky, deep; vibrating through your ears and sending tingles down your spine. He leans in for another deep, last kiss; biting onto your bottom lip and tugging back before letting it go. He dips to your jaw, to your neck— painting the surface with feathery kisses and tiny, subtle bites.
"Hwa, we're still out." You giggle and gently tap his chest. 
"Right." He sheepishly smiles and continues to hold you.
"I'm gonna grab some water real quick. We should try and find everyone when I come back."
"Let me just come with you." He grabs at your hand.
"I'll be fine, pichu." You smile toothlessly at him. "I'll be back before you know it. Try to text one of the boys! Save our space!"
"Fine." Seonghwa slightly whines as he lets go of your hand and watches you walk off. At this point, San, Wooyoung and Hongjoong find him without Seonghwa having to lift a finger— both San and Wooyoung carrying two glasses in their hands.
"Aye! Finally fucking found your ass. Where's baby girl? Got more shots." Wooyoung looks around for your familiar figure.
"She went to get water."
"I got it right here. Tequila water." Wooyoung snorts at his failed attempt of a joke.
"You're an idiot." Seonghwa shakes his head and takes the glass, holding onto it while looking around the room. It hasn't been long, but he's hoping you haven't been swallowed by the crowd and are at least at the bar requesting for water.
"Let's wait for Y/N." San adds.
"Sounds good with me." Wooyoung shrugs.
5 minutes quickly turns into 10 and you're still not back from your water run. Seonghwa can't help but be worried, eyes now frantically scanning every inch of the room to catch any glimpse of you.
"Damn, that's a long water break. Should we just go to the bar and find her?" Whatever Wooyoung's saying is completely drowned out by Seonghwa because he finally spots you, and he's fuming. Everything in the club seems to drown out, and it almost feels like white noise. Hwa finds you at the opposite corner of the bar, and of course, Song Mingi would be the person you're occupied with. That's why you haven't returned, of fucking course. He continues to watch from his spot, feeling unsettled from the entire situation. It starts off pretty normal, until Mingi starts whispering near your ear; doing his best to pull you close, keep you close. He sees you gently rejecting Mingi's touches, shoving off his hand and pushing his arm away— clearly making you uncomfortable. Seonghwa finds his free hand balled into a fist, already boiling with anger at how Mingi doesn't read any of your signs.
Instead, continues to put you through it because he's your ex. He thinks he can get away with it. He knows he can.
"I'll be back." Seonghwa says taking the shot in one swift motion, setting his empty glass aside on the high table nearby. San furrows his brows as he watches him leave, following his trail over to the opposite end of the club.
"Oh shit." San says under his breath, and Hongjoong is confused.
"What?"
"Mingi." He points over to the other side of the club and Joong lets out a sigh, followed by a heavy—
"Fuck."
As Seonghwa comes from behind, Mingi is the first to spot him and smirks. You don't really notice until Mingi has stopped trying to get close to you, turning over your shoulder to see your own bestfriend shooting daggers his way.
"What's up, Seonghwa?" The way Mingi says his name is so fucking annoying, Hwa can't help but roll his eyes. Mingi leaves out his hand in hopes of Hwa taking it in a friendly dap. All Seonghwa does is look at it before returning his attention back up to him, then back to you.
"Come on. Let's go." Hwa mutters as tries to gently drag you away by the wrist, but Mingi stops him.
"Woah. We were just having a conversation."
"Back up." Seonghwa steps in front of you and tries to get Mingi to back up, creating some distance between you two.
"Kinda rude for someone to intervene when they have no business to."
"Didn't know that required you to put your hands on her."
"Seonghwa." You warn, but he doesn't listen.
"Of course." Mingi laughs and licks his lips before closing in on the distance, clearly drunk and trying to be belligerent by provoking Seonghwa. His face is only a couple of inches away from Seonghwa's, but he isn't doing anything to back down from whatever the fuck Mingi is trying to start. Because yeah, he's drunk too, and this is you they were talking about. "Wanna be all high and mighty now? Be the knight in shining armor you always tried to be?" Mingi snickers.
"Back away from me, Mingi." Seonghwa warns lowly. "Step the fuck away."
"Or what? The fuck are you gonna do about it, Seonghwa?" Mingi mutters. "Think she'll finally give into you?" He chuckles pathetically. "Finally give you what you've been wanting for years? I know you've always been mad because you couldn't bag her when I did. Couldn't touch her, fuck her like—" Seonghwa pushes him with so much power that Mingi stumbles and fall back on a high table nearby, knocking over a glass as his arm hits the table. Mingi recovers quickly though, glaring at him as he pushes Seonghwa back and tries to land a punch on him. Mingi successfully lands it when Hwa fails to dodge, cutting the corner of his lip after the impact. They continue to go at it, causing people to step back and watch the chaos ensue from around.
"Hwa! Get off! Stop!" You scream, trying to pry him off. San, Hongjoong and Wooyoung rush over, both San and Joong having to separate the two until the bouncers come and kick your group and Mingi's group out of the club.
"Jesus fucking christ." Wooyoung glares at the bouncer and throws his hands up. "Okay, okay, we're going!"
"Let me catch you, fucking punk!" You hear Mingi yell as him and his group walk down the opposite block, the bouncers still keeping an eye on your groups to make sure nothing occurs outside of the club and requires police activity. You walk a few steps before you push Seonghwa by the shoulder, forcing him to look at you as he tends to his lip.
"What the fuck did you do that for?!" You look at him and Seonghwa's almost taken aback by your reaction. 
What do you even mean?
He did this to protect you and keep you away from that asshole, but you don't even seem the least bit concerned about him.
At all.
"W-what?" Seonghwa looks at you, his chest rising as he tries to calm himself from all the adrenaline and anger. 
"You didn't have to do that!" You yell, on the verge of tears. You're angry at Seonghwa, but you're angry because you hate seeing him hurt. You hate that he intervened, you hate that he's hurt because of the fight. You're angry, you're hurt, and everything is coming out all wrong. "I was fine, you didn't have to get in between, Seonghwa!"
"The hell you mean I didn't?!"
"Hwa." Hongjoong calls for him, eyeing the bouncers nearby.
"He wasn't doing anything!"
"Here you go again! Be serious for once, Y/N. He's a fucking asshole! When are you going to realize that?!"
♡ FLASHBACK
"Yeah, whatever. Fuck you, Song Mingi." You walk out of his room, aggressively wiping the tears streaming down your cheeks.
"Fucking crazy. Get the hell outta here!" He yells from his room, causing you to flip him off as you walk down the hallway and out of his front door. 
Song Mingi was a certified asshole.
Time and time again, your ex-boyfriend of 2 years proves to you that you just aren't shit to him. Two years, then an on-and-off again situation where Mingi just couldn't commit to you again — but he needed you to feel wanted, to feel like he had a safety blanket to fall on, to feel like he could string you along until that very last moment he couldn't. He'd whisper sweet nothings whenever he saw you late nights; no longer leaving his home to go on dates, but to stay wrapped up in his sheets. Telling you things he knows will make you weak, thing he knows will make you stay a little longer. All these years of this back and forth game you played with your ex, you had no idea why you couldn't just learn and do better for yourself instead of letting him reel you in, making you think he genuinely wanted and needed you.
There was no one like you.
You, so perfect.
You, made just for him. 
You should've known better.
This was no one else's fault but your own. You let him in, you let him in, you let him in. And you fall for it every single time, knowing you were never going to be his one and only again, knowing you weren't the only one he was keeping around. But for whatever sick reason, you wanted to believe you could get him to change again. You wanted to believe you meant more to him, that your history meant more to him. But that's all it was— wishful thinking.
Empty words built on shaky foundation.
So here you are, after he had called you saying he had missed you and wished you were near him. Here you are, crying everything you have left in you after giving him what he wanted. Here you are, after hearing that this wasn't anything to Mingi, that you weren't anything to Mingi. Here you are, broken to pieces, empty, soulless.
Again and again.
"Fucking asshole." You groan to yourself, tears streaming steadily as you head down the street from his building to a random corner. You sit on the sidewalk, kicking aggressively at the rocks beneath your feet. You give one last good grunt out of frustration before you rest your arms on your knees, head hanging low to let all your tears fall freely.
You had been crying so hard that you hadn't realized a car had pulled up in the empty spot near the curb you sat on, car being turned off before someone steps out and shut their door. You suddenly feel a hand on your back and you instantly ease up, knowing exactly who that touch belongs to.
"Hwa." You look at him, watery eyes blood shot red. He can't help but feel sorry for you, you're aware. You can tell by the way his brows soften when he sees how torn up you are, you can tell by the way his lips poke out because he isn't really sure what else he can say at this point. He shouldn't have to say anything anymore. He shouldn't be here—
You shouldn't be here.
"I told you to stay put." He teasingly scolds you, but you continue to look at him with that sad, pathetic look. "Let's get home, hm?" He follows up, free hand coming to wipe your tears away. You nod, allowing Seonghwa to help you up and into the car. He doesn't really say anything when he gets in and buckles his seatbelt, but he glances over at you, watches as you sink in the passenger's seat and look out the window.
He hates it, and he wishes he could do more to take this away from you. To keep you away from Mingi, to take away your pain completely.
It's not the first time Seonghwa's had to come get you. He's almost losing track of how many times you've called him crying because you wanted to leave a party after seeing Mingi flirting around [even though he'd deny it time and time again]. The times you've called because he left you at parties to hang out with other people, other girls. The times Mingi has disrespectfully called you out your name mid-argument, gaslighting you into thinking you were in the wrong.
Seonghwa's only hope is that one day, you'll finally get tired of your ex and move on. Leaving Mingi where he belongs, especially when he couldn't even give you the proper respect. Mingi's only reasoning for breaking up with you was that he couldn't do this anymore, he couldn't do the relationship anymore. He just couldn't, and you knew what he truly meant— it just wasn't you anymore. 
And for months and months, you sat there wondering what you could've done differently, or if there was a sign that you had missed. Every time he called, it had you thinking he must've realized he couldn't do this without you, that he was wrong and that he did want this after all.
Nope.
He made you believe it for a night, yes. Then, he'd go back to reminding you what you actually meant to you— that you were delusional, that you kept forcing things between him. That you knew what this was.
You should've known what this was.
♡ END
"He wasn't even doing anything! Not shit you needed to step in between for! He was literally—"
"Oh my fucking god." Seonghwa groans. "And you're still defending him!" He yells, his brows furrowed when he turns to look at you. He feels like he can barely breathe due to the anger surging through his veins, plus the betrayal he's feeling with the way you're delivering your responses. The way you look at him. The way you're keeping your distance.
After everything, it still seems like you're taking Mingi's side. You always find a way to defend him one way or another, even if you don't realize it.
Seonghwa does, and it hurts.
"I'm not!" Your tone is louder. "I could've taken care of it myself, he wasn't doing anything!" You repeat.
"He was making you uncomfortable, Y/N! All up in your space, trying to force you to do shit when you didn't want it. Yet, you wanna tell me he wasn't doing anything?"
"I'm just saying it wasn't that big of a deal, Hwa! I could've handled it!"
"Really? I doubt that." 
"Wow, are you serious?" You say, hurt. But, he scoffs and continues because you need to hear this. 
"I am. You always let him push you around and walk all over you. I thought by now you'd be smart enough to realize that you're worth much more than that." His tone rises again. "Why do you always let him do this to you? You're so used to the way Mingi treats you and you do nothing to change that. You always let him in. You're so brainwashed and you literally have no respect for yourself, it's fucking sad."
"You know nothing about our relationship." You're crying and angrily wiping away at your tears, unsure of how else to act, what else to say. Sure, you and Seonghwa have gotten into petty fights and arguments. Mostly over dumb shit, but nothing ever this serious. You know he cares, and he means well. But this anger, this seemingly pent up frustration— you aren't entirely sure where it was stemming from. You have never seen him act this way and quite frankly, this part of Seonghwa is very difficult to navigate. 
You've never had to.
"Yeah, because I wasn't the one rescuing you in the middle of the night every time he decided to throw your ass out, right? Because I wasn't the one having to calm you down when you were crying? Because I wasn't the one whose had to pick up the pieces every time he broke your heart to try and chase after somebody else? When he says all those shitty things about you that get to your head? When he'd fucking leave you stranded?" He shakes his head. "I'm sure I know nothing about your relationship." The two of you are staring at each other, both at a loss for words after everything has been laid out on the table. Seonghwa is the first to break, having enough of this bullshit and not wanting to say anything else. Mostly because he still cares about you and your feelings, and it's breaking his heart to see you crying over him this time. "I'm done here. I'm sure San will take you home."
"Whatever, fuck you." You respond before turning on your heel to walk away. As soon as you've created enough distance between you and Seonghwa, you find yourself stopping in your path to sob into your hands. It isn't until a few minutes later that you feel hands on your arms, a familiar touch that belongs to somebody else dear to you—
"Hey, let's get you home." San says, with Wooyoung behind him. You can't see much due to the tears in your eyes, but you can tell it's Hongjoong walking alongside of Seonghwa, making sure he's okay and pushing him along towards the car.
"He'll be okay. Just needs some time to breathe." Wooyoung adds, holding out his arm so that you can slip yourself right underneath while walking to San's car. "You alright?" Wooyoung pouts, wiping some of the straggling tears escaping your bottom lids.
"Mhm." You lie, just to keep the walk quiet and peaceful. And it is for a bit, even as you sit in the backseat of San's car. The only thing filling the space is the music playing through bluetooth— Wooyoung's playlist, actually. San peeks over at you through the rearview mirror, feeling bad for how everything went down. But, he gets it. He gets Seonghwa. You do deserve better. Mingi should never get an ounce of your attention after how he's treated you— esp with Seonghwa being here all along.
"You know he just really cares about you, right?" San breaks the silence. 
"I know." You mumble, head leaning back against the seat while you look out the window. "I've just never seen him act that way."
"It's Mingi." Wooyoung adds. "Can I be honest?" He turns to look at you with doe eyes. "I'm not trying to attack you, I promise. We see both sides." You nod quietly. "It's hard when you have history with someone, and it's hard to undo bad habits you've learned in the relationship. We know Mingi was someone special to you, but he hasn't been good for you for a long time. And there's no changing that man at this point. If it's anybody, Seonghwa knows all of that very well, especially when he's been by your side throughout everything." Wooyoung lets out a small sigh. "I'm certain he's hurt because even after everything he's done to be there, Mingi's actions seem to be dismissible. And his actions get overlooked."
"Woo, I'm not even dismissing Mingi's actions."
"Okay, baby girl. You're not. But, I think Seonghwa would have appreciated if you were there for him tonight instead of getting upset. He just wants to keep you safe."
"His goal has always been to keep you safe." San adds softly, driving towards your place.
"I didn't want Hwa to get hurt, h-he didn't have to do that." You sniffle, leaning your head against the window.
"You know he's not gonna sit back and let that shit happen." Woo adds, also leaning his head back against the headrest— a small headache forming after tonight's events. When you finally get home, San and Wooyoung offer to stay the night to keep you company, but you politely decline. They walk you to the door and give you big hugs, asking you a million times if you're sure about being alone tonight.
And you quietly nod.
Because there's nothing else you'd rather be than alone tonight. You want to be alone in your own space, crying alone in your bed; head against the pillow, tucked underneath your sheets.
You want to be alone.
Meanwhile, Seonghwa is struggling. He isn't sure what to do, hates not having you by his side. He doesn't know what's gonna happen from here on out, what will be left of you two after all this.
From the kiss, to Mingi, to the argument.
It's so fucked up.
Seonghwa hadn't even realized how much of his life was dedicated to you— how much of his life was just you. Even when he tried so hard for it to not be you.
"Fuck!" Seonghwa groans and slams his hand against a brick wall in passing. 
"Aye, come on now." Hongjoong clicks his teeth and pushes him away from the wall, urging him to continue down the car. "Don't hurt yourself."
"I swear to God if I ever see Mingi—"
"You won't. He should know better, and hopefully Y/N does, too." Hwa lets out a hefty sigh as he swings Joong's door open and plops into the passenger's seat. Not much is said between the two, even as Hongjoong drives off to his place. Seonghwa rests his head back and shuts his eyes, equally angry, yet dizzy from the alcohol still running through him. 
"I don't know what to do, Joong. I can't keep doing this just for it to get me nowhere."
"You two really need to fucking talk." Hongjoong does a slight head tilt as he continues to drive to Seonghwa's place. "I don't mean to make this worse, but I saw you two." Seonghwa looks at him before resting his head back against the headrest again. "I didn't come so I could give you guys some space."
"Fuck." Hwa repeats again with a heavy sigh. "Yeah, I don't know where this leaves us."
"Give it a few days or whatever, but you need to figure this out with her." Seonghwa doesn't speak anymore, mainly because he's starting to feel nauseous after the adrenaline, the alcohol. He's doing his best to keep it together. But, on top of that, he has a ton of thoughts swirling in his mind— he doesn't really know how to tackle them or where to even start. In the end, he's afraid of what this will do to your relationship.
You and him.
In the end, he just doesn't know anymore.
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This is the longest Seonghwa hasn't talked to you. It's been a little over two weeks— usually, the two of you would break in a few hours, not wanting to be without the other for long.
But this, this was different.
Of course, everything felt awful. You both felt awkward about having to be the first person to break the silence, both remembering that night and how heated it had gotten.
The kiss.
The argument.
Everything about the situation felt like doom, chaos. A whole whirlwind of emotions and feelings overpowering each other, threatening to burst at the seams.
Seonghwa had thought long and hard about this, though. For him, he decided he just needed to step back and give himself a breather. Let him do things for himself, carry on with the mentality that he'd finally put himself first. So, that's what he's been trying to do. It doesn't mean it doesn't suck, though. It does. It's terrible. He's gotten so used to having you by his side, so used to running to you first about anything and everything.
He's had to bite his tongue when he finally nailed that fucking uni pasta recipe he had been experimenting for years. Because he wanted to tell you he did so, wanted to invite you over so you could be the first to taste it;
Oh well.
His heart sinks when the realization hits him again, and he's having to give himself a 'lil pep talk to push through. He can't be the person to say sorry first, he can't be the first to break— not when he didn't do anything wrong. He needs to stop apologizing when he's not in the wrong or when he feels bad. He's given you way too much of that, and this time around, he wasn't going to.
He needs you to be the first to break. Needs you to be the one to say sorry. Needs you to show him you understand and that you would never intentionally hurt him, especially over Song Mingi.
He's still counting the days. Maybe he'll have to keep doing so. Gives him time to himself, some peace. Let's him know how much you'd truly work to salvage your relationship with him.
Your own bestfriend before anything.
Because he knows he'd do anything to keep you by his side. He would. It just sucks that he doesn't know if you would do the same. He can't confidently say the same.
But, you absolutely would.  Days and nights have passed and you could barely sleep, always questioning what Seonghwa was doing and if he was even thinking about you. This was on you, though. You knew it. You just didn't know how to say it to him and it's definitely a learning lesson for you— all in all, you wanna be better and you wanna be better for him. You miss Seonghwa a lot. You truly didn't know what it meant to be missing your other half until now;
Empty, alone.
Cold.
You sigh as you toss the pillow aside and sit up in bed, checking the time on the clock. 
3am.
You couldn't sleep, and you freeze. You freeze because you have no one to call anymore. So you turn, and turn. No longer able to find sleep for the rest of the night.
When the sun finally rises, you force yourself to get up to go for a run and grab a good cup of coffee and breakfast. It was your day off, but you thought you could at least take advantage of being up early; take advantage of soaking in the morning sun.
You were tired of sulking and being in bed. Being cooped up at home when you weren't at work.
You throw on your leggings and matching sports bra, grabbing an oversized zip-up to shield you from the morning cold. Yaya is already working in the kitchen, so you quickly let her know you'll be out for a run— rushing over to your car to avoid any questioning this early in the day. You drive over to a lake near town that has a 4.5 mile trail around its perimeter. Since it's still early, the trail isn't crowded with people; perfect enough for you to get a good 3 mile run in. You hadn't ran in a minute, but 3 miles seemed to be a breeze when there was a lot of pent up frustration and anger you needed to release. Of course, you were beyond tired at the end, but it wasn't anything coffee and a good pastry couldn't fix.
At the cafe, you grab a seat right outside of the entrance to enjoy your breakfast, scrolling through social media per usual. You click into your messages for god knows why, knowing Seonghwa hadn't messaged you.
He hasn't.
Why would he?
You sigh, the sadness now returning. You quickly clean up and toss your trash into the bin inside the restaurant before grabbing your cup of iced coffee and heading home. Once you get home, you throw your clothes into the laundry and take a hot, steamy shower, letting your worries go momentarily.
And then, you nap. Exhaustion finally hitting you from the lack of sleep.
Post-nap, you take time to clean around your suite and hang out with Yaya, watching a few episodes of her current favorite show. You help Yaya with a few things around the house, taking the time to bring her to the grocery store just right before the sun sets. Even though Yaya can tell something is wrong, she doesn't bother you or question you like you'd expect— probably leaving it for Soyeon to do the heavy lifting. You do appreciate that you don't have to dwell on it while spending time with her, though. 
Soyeon, Charli and Junseo had visited the past days, and although Charli was able to make you smile and laugh, Soyeon could also easily tell something was wrong without you having to say anything at all. Your demeanor had changed, you seemed to be snapping quicker than usual. Attitude wasn't so bright and happy. Seonghwa hadn't been around, but the other boys had quickly stopped by just to hang out.
You dimmed it down to a 'little fight between you and Hwa,' but Soyeon knew better than that, and she was hoping she'd be able to get it out of you soon. This wasn't like you, and it wasn't like Seonghwa to not come around for days on end.
This wasn't just a little fight.
"Hey." She calls you when you're settled back in your humble abode, and although you don't mind hearing from your boss-slash-cousin, you could do without any work-related conversations right now.
"What's up? Everything okay?"
"Yeah, I'm leaving the restaurant soon. Yoongi and Junseo are going to close up. It's gotten quiet. Can I stop by? I have some food for you."
"Sure. Where's Chacha?"
"With Junseo's parents."
"Mm." You hum. "Okay."
"Okay, I'll be there in about 30 minutes or so. I'm just gonna wrap a few things up here."
"Sounds good." You hang up the call, a bit relieved that your cousin [not your cousin on boss-mode] is coming over. 
When she arrives, it's about 7:45pm. She quietly knocks before announcing her presence— stepping out of her shoes before joining you on your living room floor in front of the coffee table and TV. For a good part of the conversation, you indulge in some of the chicken she brought over, listening to her update you about the restaurant and some drama on his side of the family. She asks if there's anything new going on with you or the boys, and you simply shrug.
This is definitely her way of poking at you, and you're very close to cracking because who else can you open up to about this?
No one, and at this point, you need to. You need the reassurance.
"Are you sure nothing's up? To be honest, I know something's bothering you, and I know this wasn't just a 'little fight' between you and Hwa." She forms air quotes. That's the moment you do crack, tears welling in your eyes when you revisit that night. You tell Soyeon everything and confide in her, giving her more details about your dinner with San, to dancing with Seonghwa and kissing him, to Mingi and their fight. You tell her it's been about two weeks since you've spoken and you know Seonghwa is waiting for you to make the first move. 
You tell her how you've started to realize your feelings for Seonghwa after everything and how incredibly terrified you are of them.
"I don't know what to do, Soyeon. He probably hates me."
"Just go over there and talk to him, Y/N. What are you waiting for? You know he's waiting for you to take initiative, and you should this time. This is all you." You sigh, bottom lip trembling as you begin to cry. 
"I know."
"You know Seonghwa the best. It's so obvious how much he likes you and adores you after all this time. Why are you so afraid?"
"I know, I know." You sniffle. "I just am, Soyeon. I'm afraid of getting hurt, I'm afraid of Seonghwa realizing this isn't what he expected. I'm afraid of Seonghwa." You cry a bit harder and Soyeon is holding you close, rubbing your back as you lean against her shoulder. "I'm scared of this ruining us completely. What if we do get together and things don't pan out the way we expected? I'm so scared of losing him completely that I just don't know where I lie in all of this despite my feelings for him."
"You can't be afraid about every little thing, Y/N. I know it's scary, and life hasn't been entirely nice to you. But, this is your bestfriend. You can't just sit around and brush it under the rug when you know this is something you two need to discuss. Regardless of what happens, Seonghwa will never let you go. You two have been through so much together, he would never wanna do life without you by his side. Never." She continues to reassure you, giving you the push you need to get yourself together and just face it.
You loved Seonghwa, and it was time you looked beneath the surface.
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Soyeon didn't stay too long after the two of you finish eating last night— turning the conversation into something more lighthearted after you cried and thanked her for being there for her. Her reassurance worked so much that you're ready to tackle the morning bright and early, throwing on some clothes to head over to Seonghwa's place. After Soyeon left, you called Wooyoung and asked what time Seonghwa's shift was for tomorrow. He snorted and told you it was 10am and asked what you were up to. You let Wooyoung know about your talk with Soyeon and that you missed him, finally throwing the stupid shit aside to just try and talk to him about that night.
To apologize, to make things right.
To tell him that you love him.
You keep it casual and comfy, throwing on some black and white wide-leg track pants, a crop tank and a baggy grey zip-up hoodie. You throw on your shoes, swiftly grab your keys and crossbody bag, jogging out to your car with a quick 'good morning' yell to Yaya from the side of the house. As you drive over to Seonghwa's apartment, you are equally filled with anxiety, nervousness and adrenaline. You're ready to put this behind you, but you're especially ready to talk to Seonghwa again. See him. Hug him. 
Keep him close, never let him stray far again.
You pull into a guest lot, shutting off your car and wondering if you should've brought over some coffee, breakfast, anything, to make this a bit less awkward.
"Fuck." You mutter to yourself as you shake the thoughts from your head; no time for overthinking while you're running on limited time. You jog up the steps and up to Seonghwa's apartment, hesitating when you get to the front door before you finally bring your knuckles to the surface to give a couple of loud knocks. It takes a second before you hear rustling behind the door, Seonghwa clearing his throat before he swings the door open in a white tank and sweats. Your eyes immediately meet his, but he looks surprised, caught off guard even.
But, caught off guard in a sense that he's been caught doing something he shouldn't be doing.
You don't understand it until you see someone in the back try to slip by unnoticed, but she's wearing Seonghwa's shirt. Your heart immediately sinks to your gut and it makes you feel queasy. It shouldn't, but you hate to say it does.
It's probably Makayla.
It's too fucking late.
"Oh." Is all you say, and Seonghwa feels his heart break to a million pieces when he sees the look on your face. You're trying your hardest not to show how much it hurts you, but he knows you. He knows you well, that's for damn sure.
"Y/N—"
"It's good, I didn't meant to interrupt, I'm sorry— I'll catch you later." You ramble and rush down the steps, hurrying away from the apartment to prevent Seonghwa from seeing the tears streaming down your cheeks. 
This was your fault anyway, who else was there to blame?
"Y/N!" Seonghwa calls out one last time, but you're already running to your car. Very obvious that you're wiping away at your face as you sink into the driver's seat and pull out of the spot without turning back. "Fuck." Seonghwa groans to himself, and Makayla kinda just watches everything unfold right in front of her eyes. He runs a hand through his long, black locks, shutting the door quietly behind him as he turns to her and gives her a sympathetic smile. 
"I'm sorry."
"That was Y/N?"
"Uh, yeah. My bestfriend." He looks at her, and she can already tell. She can already tell that it's you, and there is more to it than that. He loves you, and it's very, very obvious.
"You love her, don't you?" He lets out a breath and shrugs. He doesn't say anything for a bit, rather looks at her with those big doe-eyes before she catches him subtly nodding and diverting his attention to the floor.
"I'm so, so sorry, Makayla. I really am." What the fuck else can he say? He must look so fucked up right now; having taken her out the night before and let her spend the night after fumbling in the sheets. He was curious to see if Makayla would be the door to a new path, something that'll help him move forward. He had hope. After this morning's events, that clearly wasn't going to be the case and he wasn't going to lie about it.
"Don't be." She gives him a small, toothless smile. Because although it does suck, she's been there before and she'd hate for Seonghwa to miss out on the person he truly wants to be with. "You should really talk to her before it's too late."
♡ FLASHBACK | EARLY COLLEGE
You're on Seonghwa's back as he trails behind the group, walking up the path to the view of the city behind campus. Hongjoong, San, Wooyoung and a few other heads had wanted to go on a late night walk— the goal being the view at the end for everyone to just sit and admire. At first, you didn't feel like going with a bunch of obnoxious boys. But, you had been cooped up in your room doing nothing but studying all day. It sounded better knowing Seonghwa would be around and being in the crisp, night air. 
Seonghwa continues to walk up the slightly steep hill before spotting the view just down the street, you jumping off his back as soon as it becomes clear in sight.
"Hwa! Look at it!" You squeal, running to one of the free areas near the fence to get a good picture of the view. "It's so pretty! Look!" 
"Yeah, it is." He catches his breath as he walks over next to you. Trekking that hill is not for the weak.
"Oh my god, look at all those lights. It's so beautiful. I didn't realize how flat the town is." You're mainly thinking out loud, saying it to yourself, but Seonghwa chuckles next to you and quietly nods. "I think I can see our favorite convenient store from here, and our favorite spot to get jajangmyeon."
"How would you know, they're little blobs right now."
"How would you not know, Seonghwa? Are you a fraud? Do you even like those places like you say you do?" He snorts.
"Relax, Nancy Drew. It was just a question."
"I just know." You say so matter-of-fact-ly that Seonghwa smiles to himself while you continue to look out at the view. "The stars are so pretty tonight, weather is so perfect. Ugh. We should do this more often." You continue to go on and Seonghwa just likes listening to you talk. He always has, always will.
Everything about you was his favorite.
"I— what?" You look up and see Seonghwa still staring at you before he lets out a deep chuckle.
"Nothing."
"Pichu, what is it?" He looks at you again, and it's obvious he wants to tell you something but is preventing himself from spilling it out onto the table for whatever reason. You turn towards him and cross your arms, tapping your foot to wait for his response.
"Nothing! I'm just— nothing."
"Park Seonghwa."
"I-I—" He sighs. "I just wanted to tell you that I'm glad you ended up going on the walk with us. I wanted you here."
"Aw, you little sap." You pinch his bicep and he yelps. "Are you sure that's all?" He nods.
"Thank you, Y/N. For everything." He ruffles your hair and you can't help but pout at. "You know? For being a pain in the ass bestfriend."
"I beg to differ, but you're welcome." You chuckle. "Always us, right pichu?" You playfully punch him on the bicep before returning your attention back to the view.
And he'll forever remember this as the first time he tried to confess his feelings for you.
♡ END
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♡ taglist: @hwasbabygirl @fairyofhueningkai @chngbnwf @tinyteezer @everyonewooeverywhere @pearbunny @mxnsxngie @starhwahwa @woosmaid @yeosangsbbg @jycas @lyracarvahall @huachengsbestie01 @asjkdk @bintificreads @interweab @svintsandghosts @cheolliehugs
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itsyagurlchip · 8 days ago
Note
INGRESSIVE INHALE
I. Need. 2018 Raphael. DATE HEADCANONS
(only if you want :3)
☀︎⋆.ೃ࿔*:・Lovely Sights☀︎⋆.ೃ࿔*:・
ᯓᡣ𐭩warnings: none, enjoy :)!
ᯓᡣ𐭩 VOID MY DEARRRRR ❤️❤️❤️ I GOTCHU BAE 🤪 but fr, thx for requesting! (GUYS STOP SAYING "IF YOU WANT TO" GRGGRGRGGR I WOULDVE DELETED THE ASK IF I DIDNT WANT TO USYGSUYGSUHVUSGV) (this was from months ago, we are now divorced. croak you old witch/jjjj)
ᯓᡣ𐭩 Ohhhhh, Raph has a datemateee~
Raph is a huge guy, so that's where all the love's gonna be at today.
He loves it when you sleep on top of him when you guys cuddle, to feel that small pressure on him makes him sleep as well.
While he doesn't like holding you per say, he loves it when you hang onto him.
It makes him feel like he doesn't always have to be aware of himself holding you, and only the things around you two.
Raph feels comforted when you just hold his face, and close your eyes..
Whether it is a breathing practice, or when he needs to calm down, he always likes the feeling of your hands against his face.
Double points if you scratch his neck between those two spikes-!
Oh man, you're the best at those.
I feel like if Raph were approached with a situation where he's feeling possessive, he'd get all shy and nervous about it.
He feels as if it shouldn't be right for him to feel that way, I mean, y-you're already perfect so- why'd you wanna huffy puffy giant over your shoulder?
Nuh uh! He resists it all! Okay, maybe glare at the woman staring at you, and the dude biting his lip.
What's up with everyone and trying to snatch you up!? All the other people were wuss, and Raph got you first!
Eyes off punk!
Sometimes, when you're sitting on the couch, Raph just likes to plant his head on your lap and watch you do whatever you're doing.
The way your face scrunches up when a main character does something stupid.
Or when you giggle at a short video.
And when you subconsciously start rubbing your hand against the back of his neck.
It makes him shiver, with a deep rumble, and relax more into your warmth.
Sometimes you don't even know it, but Raph unknowingly takes your arm and just rests his teeth there.
Not even biting it, just resting his jaw between your arm.
Sometimes he adds pressure to feel the gummy-squish as he nibbles softly.
"Raph, Honey, you're doing it again." You'd say, smiling a bit as Donnie went on to explain what the mission was.
"Mhoin' wha'?" He muffled, looking down at your arm and letting go immediately.
He gets super embarrassed afterwards.
On the line of embarrassed, the MOMENT you leave the lair he's all giggly n stuff.
"Bro who gotchu smilin' like that?"
He brothers tease him so much for it, but he can't help but take it because ALL of what they're saying is TRUE.
Poor guy is lovesick, and all you did was make kandi together :)
Sometimes he likes to gush to Mikey about your most recent date, or the outfit you wore today, and the way you smiled while talking about your favorite food.
Mikey was eatin' it up. He declared Raph 'Downbad, Certified Love Chaser.'
Leo would side eye with every rant, pretending to throw up at every compliment Raph prayed your way.
Like bro, keep that to yourself thank yew very much.
If Raph ever talks to Donnie about you, he would simply be confused.
Why is Raph talking about crushes to Donnie? His heart belongs to the one and only Atomic Lass.
With all those words, he could literally program a bot. But he lets him talk, never really listens though.
I don't think i've ever covered this part of him, but how would Savage Raph feel about you?
Me personally, I see Savage Raph as a defense mechanism to protect himself when he truly thinks he's alone.
And in turn, it sort of makes him more turtle than teenager you know?
Let's look at this two ways;
If he did think you were a threat, he would probably hurt you severely. When snapping turtles find people as threats, they either hide or bite them.(I know many people don't like hearing that, but I think it's true)
If he didn't, then he would protect you as well. Maybe even huddle himself around you to create a barrier between you and the world. When snapping turtles want to show affection, they protect their mates from harm.
Do you see the vision?
Which brings me to my next point:
While Raph never wants to intentionally hurt you, ever, it still happens. Savage Raph, for example.
You guys will find yourselves in moments where you nick your hands or shoulders during cuddling, and Raph apologizes heavily.
He'll panic first, not knowing what to do because his mind's run a blank.
But after a lil pep talk with mind Raph, he gets himself together and grabs you a bandaid from his dresser, not before cleaning the scratch though.
When you guys train together, his punches can leave giant bruises on you and he feels guilty every single time.
You swear you're fine! You could take more!!
But Raph seeing you breath heavily will be like "Nope! Nuh uh, you're going to the med-room. I ain't fightin' you until you take a break!"
All Raph knows, he has a lovely sight to see everyday.
He couldn't believe it took so long to find it.
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tehe I made it extra long for you<333
૮₍˶• .•⑅₎ა tags: @kittykittyanon @bonefanatic @oleander-nin @towomatos @thealphagirl
૮₍˶• .•⑅₎ა@ziipzeepzop-eez @wheezdostuff @spongejuice @cyb3r-st4r @matteo-hamato
@clown-froggi
if you would like to be added, check my blog. if you would like to be added, check my blog. SEE? I SAID IT TWICE!!
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dianadiaries · 5 months ago
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ateez’s reaction to you wearing waist chain. bet theyre going crazy over it as if they hadnt been obsessed with your waist already 🤪
-- mono diana ask!!
aa I love this idea soooo much, so I don't have an idea for all of ateez but for yunho!!
You have been scrolling for quite sometime, till you saw this cute swimsuit idea! You decided to text Yunho to come to the beach with you! After doing so you find out everyone is coming, not that it bothers you they are your friends to! You find your swimsuit that matches your skin perfectly. But you were missing one thing, what was it that the girl had in the video. After your mind pondered for a while you figured it out again, waist beads! You had a couple only around three, two were a pearly look-a-like and other matched the color of your swimsuit.
You look in your lengthy mirror, and smile. You had the looks of a mermaid in her own little lagoon. Ethereal. After finding a cute cover up to put over your swimsuit, you decided to make a picnic basket. You looked in the fridge, and packed up watermelon, bubbly soda, and some sandwiches. But you being you, you brought some other snacks for the members! After a while you got a ding from Yunho, he was here with all the boys for the beach! You giggled and put on your sandals, and walked out your house. "Hi /your name!!" Wooyoung says happily as you enter the car with your cute little strawberry basket. "Hi woo!!" You say plopping down next to him.
"what is that basket for?" A husky voice questions, "o—oh uhh it's food I got it for everyone!" You say a tad bit startled from Mingi's rather deep voice. You all have a bit till yall get to the beach so you sleep with wooyoung while Seonghwa is helping yunho with directions. Yeosang and Jongho are talking. Hongjoong, San, and Mingi are arguing about what flavor of cheetos are better. But sooner or later yall get to the beach. "/your name, wooyoung! Wake up we are here!" Seonghwa says. While everyone is still getting out the car, Yunho stares at you a bit while your sleeping before waking you up. After your little sleepy haze you are walking to the beach with everyone. Yunho is holding on to your waist while you have the basket in your hand.
finally that ocean breeze, you place everything down as Seonghwa is starting to cook, a nice barbecue. Everyone else except you, Yunho, and Mingi are playing volleyball. You, Yunho and Mingi are about to swim, as you take your cover up off you can feel a certain someones eyes on you. That someone being Yunho. Your waistbeads falling ever so gently on your curves, making them shine even more. "Is there a problem?" You say making sure he is okay. "Uh uh no no don't worry!" He says stuttering a bit. He really is like a wondering puppy, you relish in your mind. As you finish up that conversation, Mingi groans and yall head to the ocean. It was so pretty, and clear. Until Mingi started to splash water on you. Yunho watched from a tad bit a far. Watching the way when you jumped the waist beads would to. They just fit you so well, how can he not look.
After you and Mingi's interference, you walked back to Yunho. Yunho looked at the way when you walked the beads would go up down up down. He was in love or something. But he would never tell. You examine his face, very close. "Are you okay? You seem hot." You question him once again. "Uh—uh... I'm fine!!" Yunho brushes it off. You shrugged and walked away. Yet he stilled, and turned to watch that effortlessly gorgeous waist, and the of course pretty beads on it.
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-----> author note : aaaa I love summer what about you guys!!
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joosthead · 1 month ago
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Sorry for all of this in advance. Family AUs are my bread and butter regardless of which fandom I'm in and this revelation about the future of normal au has me going insane so just bare with me at moment. Sorry if this is weird/cringe or if you can't comment on anything due to spoilers.🫠
The first kid being an accident because of course he would be. 😅
Born soon after the first wedding, so was he the result of "we're engaged" sex or was he the reason for the proposal if there even was one before the wedding? Was Reader pregnant at the wedding??? If so, omg how cute but also it probably looked like a shotgun wedding to outsiders which is funny to me.
(Also if there was an engagement, how did Joost propose?? Was it romantic and planned or a spur of the moment thing?)
And of course the second kid is also an accident.🤣 They probably got too excited once given the all clear to have sex again after the first was born. Of course they would end up with two so close together.
Kids 1 and 2 sound like little menaces and I both love that for Joost and Reader and pity them at the same time. 
Also for the third kid, I love how Joost saying she's fussy and not liking any of his songs harkens back to when him and Reader first met and the first song of his she listened to was a skip. Like mother like daughter indeed.
I love thinking back to the prequel fic of when they met with Reader chewing out Joost for ruining her purse and later realizing she is having sex with a man with a crazy frog tattoo with all this future information in mind. Like, honey, you just met the father of your children. He is going to sing Crazy Frog to them as they go to sleep.
I'm going to say this in the context of normal au to not be parasocial and make assumptions about the actual guy, but I think Joost would be a great dad. He's like a big kid himself so he would get along with the lil kleins so well. Although that probably leaves all the discipline to poor Reader.
So those were my thoughts and feelings 🤪. I hope you don't mind all of that 😅. Normal au is one of my favorites on here and I love your writing. Can't wait to see how these two idiots fall in love. 👍
anon first of all: thank you thank you thank you for leaving this incredibly detailed and lovely ask it isn't weird or cringe I ABSOLUTELY LOVE LOVE LOVE TALKING ABOUT NORMAL AU !!! lolol i was actually going to have it so they're a 1 and done couple but i thought three little kleins running around would be so cute :’’’’))) i grappled a bit with how normal au would End as in in the future future but i really see them with the white picket fence and the kids and pets and everything….maybe it is my own personal penchant for domesticity but i can't imagine it any other way LOLSSS
reader was pregnant during the wedding!! but they didn’t know until after :’’) there was no proposal, in my head it was like they were taking a walk in joost’s hometown and he was like … we should get married. idk if town hall weddings exist in NE but they do now according to normal au LOL reader’s like yknow what. let’s get married. 
all of it was very spur of the moment but they wouldn’t have it any other way 🩷 and ofc finding out about baby 1 (i w decided he’s named laurens) is CRAZY unexpected for both of them :’’) my heart 
yes that's exactly why baby 2 is an accident LOLOL they pounced on each other the second they got the go ahead and one thing led to another and … baby 2 !! (i’m deciding baby 2 is named juna because of the song by clairo i don’t make the rules [i do make all the rules]) 
laurens n juna r partners in crime in every possible way… when they get old enough to talk and be little rascals they cover for each others various pint sized crimes of which i’m sure there are many—distracting papa from the music or mama from work, boosting each other up to steal cookies from cookie jar, 
there was really no room to worry about if they would get along or not since they’re so close in age…  fr my favorite irish twins 
sometimes reader and joost get at each others heads because parenthood but they will always remember that the common enemy is not each other—it’s the ✨kids✨jk …. unless….. 
baby number 3 (sanne!!) is definitely fussy the way reader is and the parallel to the night they met ,,, anon i didn’t even make that connection when i was writing it !! that is so fucking cute and i love how you KNOWW normal au hahaha oh my gosh i love that sm. i imagine laurens and juna to be a lot like joost in energy and mind while sanne is takes completely after reader
WHEN I TELLLLL YOUUUUUU THIS ALMOST MADE ME CRY AT WORK “like honey you just met the father of your children. he is going to sing crazy frog to them as they go to sleep.” FUCK. FUCKKKKKK. trust when you guys see the rest of normal au it will literally be such a surprise with even more future information
i also agree with you :33 normal au joost is just as blindsided by the babies as reader is but he definitely steps up to the plate for his people :33 i also think he is just such a softie he can't bring it in himself to discipline the kids in a way that matters so he has to beg reader to do it LOL
thank you so so so much for your thoughts and feelings and i invite them wholeheartedly and warmly!! i'm so happy you love normal au and my writing and i thank you for the kind compliments and such generous thoughts on normal au so so much they really keep me writing <333333
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here2bbtstrash · 1 year ago
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as promised, here it is: The Big Life Update Post (aka m where the hell have u been and what the hell is going on with this blog)
TLDR: went thru it, came out better for it, i love y'all. and we're getting back into this writing thing as i have the time and capacity 🥳
2023 has been a bit of a whirlwind, to put it very mildly. while the first three months started off relatively smoothly, my saturn return began in the middle of march. only a few short weeks after that... well, i'd basically say everything went off the fucking rails.
content warning: drama talk incoming ft. extremely brief mentions of racism and racist hate mail (no specific details shared).
i haven't spoken on this yet since everything happened, and i want to be explicitly clear that i won't be speaking on it further after this post. but i just want you to understand where i've been at since april.
i will own it entirely and say: i fucked up. i put content in a story that i shouldn't have, that i had no business speaking on, and i think people were well within their right to call me out on it, one hundred percent. however, after i went offline at the end of april, my friends ended up learning that the person who initially stirred up all of the "tea", and submitted the first several anonymous posts about me to a hate blog, was actually someone i knew well and considered a friend.
this was someone whose stories i gladly beta'd, someone i consoled through multiple hard moments in their life, someone i actually even met in person. yep. this was also someone who had read the chapter of my story that featured the problematic content when it was released, and proceeded to send me paragraphs upon paragraphs of how much they enjoyed it, and the story as a whole. this is not to say that people can't change their minds on content after sitting with it, not at all. but to think that i had been through so much with this person, done so much to be there for them, and that they never once gave me any reason to think we were anything other than close friends. yet ultimately, they didn't feel they could come directly to me... or find quite literally any other way of dealing with the issue?
instead, they chose to send multiple messages about me to a hate blog, as well as hateful anons to several of my friends, thinking that we wouldn't know it was them (we did). not only that, but their actions encouraged an actual torrent of racist hate mail to be sent to all of my non-white friends who publicly chose to support me. ultimately, they ended up admitting all of this, and still, they never once apologized or showed even a single iota of remorsefulness or responsibility for the onslaught of vitriol they incited. (even though, you know, this whole thing was supposedly about how racism is bad.)
and this user is still on the platform, operating under a new blog name and pseudonym. so. that's fun. 💀
i don't say this to beat a dead horse, or to drum up sympathy, because i promise i don't want it. it's been long enough, i understand the mistakes i made, and i've done my part to take accountability for my actions. but i needed to start this post here to have you all understand where i was at the end of april - just in time for yoongi's tour 🤪 - in many ways, i felt like i had no friends, at least none that i could really trust. i felt unsure who might have been acting one way to my face, perhaps even praising me, but talking different about me behind my back. and it was beyond fucking nervewracking to think that i would be meeting so many friends IRL for the first time, quite literally days after what essentially felt like a public execution.
i wasn't doing well, to say the least.
and then... the funniest thing happened.
y'all showed the fuck up for me. in droves. in a way that i have quite literally never experienced in my lifetime and doubt i ever will again. even recounting it now is lowkey giving me chills. i received, literally, yes i counted, hundreds of DMs from the most incredibly kind people- on tumblr, on twitter, on discord, in AO3 comments. the vast majority of you wrote paragraphs: about what my stories have meant to you, about how you found my blog to be a safe space in the noise of the world, about how much you'd enjoyed our time together here. so many of you said something along the lines of "even if you never come back here again, please keep writing". honestly, for like a week straight all i could do was read my DMs and cry and cry and cry.
i didn't receive a single hateful DM. not one.
as if that alone isn't more blessings than i deserve in an entire lifetime, i also, you know. saw five shows of agust d on tour. (my credit card is still recovering.) spent two of the best nights of my life in pit getting a water bottle baptism and screaming myself hoarse. and met dozens of incredible moots, who held me when i cried, scream-laughed with me, and of course, drank plenty of booze with me.
at a time where i wondered to myself if i even had a single true friend in this fandom (or, like, in the world), you all showed me that i had so much more. that we had so much more-- we had a community. and i believe we still do. and i am more than ready to block out all the shit that doesn't matter and get back to having some fun around here.
in short: thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you. if you sent me a sweet word, i promise you, i read it (and probably cried lmao). i wouldn't be doing any of this without you. i will never ever deserve all the love that you have shown me. but for as long as you'll have me, i'd love to have a fun stupid horny time in this little corner of the internet. as a part of our community. what a fucking gift it is. 🫶
phew. okay, so- that was april and may. it's november. what the fuck happened?
i knew i wanted to properly take time to get my head on straight before i found my way back to writing. what i wasn't expecting was to 1. fall in love, 2. get a new job, and 3. move myself and my cat approximately 800 miles across the country... but yeah, since the end of may, those 3 things are exactly what i've been doing!
i won't talk too much about my partner here, because our relationship is important enough to me that i want to keep it largely private, but my god. he is the most incredible human. i can't tell you how much of what i wrote out as silly little daydreams in my fanfiction has somehow manifested itself into this very real human being (like, it's kinda crazy lmao 🙈). i'm grateful for him every single day. and what makes it even more special is that we met for the first time in person while i was traveling for yoongi's tour - yep! he saw me going through so much upheaval, and fell for me all the same. just another thing i will never fully believe i deserve. but goddamn do i feel luckyyyyy 🥰
and in addition to my amazing partner (and in part because of him but honestly i had plans to move before i had even met this man it just happened to work out okay 🙄) i have also finally managed to do what i've been planning for the last year and a half, which is move my ass out of the southern suburbs where i'd been for nearly a decade, and to a ✨walkable city that actually has public transit✨ - what a fucking dream. i may have only been here 8 days, and i may not have much more to my name than my cat, my TV, and my mattress, but i swear to god, i've never been this happy in my entire life.
so yeah. exhale. like i said, it's been quite the year.
now i do want to end this with a small caveat, which is to say, i can't make a promise as to how much i can *be* here (particularly not compared to how terminally online i used to be lmao). i spent a lot of time online because i was unhappy and feeling very stuck with where i was in life, and i needed escapism, bad. now, i've finally gotten to a place where i'm excited to go out of my house and do things, but i still want to make intentional time for tumblr as a form of connection and community, and writing as a form of creative expression. these things are really important to me!!! i just ask that you give me some grace if i'm a little slow on the uptake. i promise i'm still here 🥰
and writing is gonna happen!!! i can't say much more than that, because tbh i haven't so much as opened a google doc since april, but i've been itching to get back to it. maybe.... we might start off....... with some........... drabble requests??? 👀 we'll see we'll see we'll see hehe.
in any case, i think that's more than enough for now 🤪 oh how i've missed babbling to you all, the gay people in my phone. i hope you're well, and if ya feel so inclined, i'd love it if you'd send me a comment or a DM on what you've been up to in the many months it's been since we've spoke! what's new in your life? what are we manifesting??
talk so so soon, eeeeee~ i'm so happy to be back~ love you babes!!! 🤍
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exo-raskreia · 1 month ago
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As a GojoHime shipper, what do you think of SatoSugu?
⚠️🚫 SS shippers DNI 🚫⚠️
Oof... Well, first things first, everyone has different preferences & BL is not my cup of tea. Fujos are also a toxic breed so I have no interest in engaging with them either.
In regards to zigzag (a lovely nickname given to this ship by many 🤪)... I find Get0 unappealing in general & am mostly neutral to his character. I don't get why he's so popular, lol? I personally find it almost offensive that ppl ship him with someone as handsome as Gojo. 💀
They are canonically best friends & nothing more (reiterated time & again by Gege & his affiliates). Their views didn't align in the end, hence they parted ways & became enemies. Despite this, Gojo still saw him as his best friend, a huge part of his "springtime of youth," & regretted not being able to help him back then. Get0 was also the cause for Gojo's identity crisis about being the strongest & was jealous of Gojo's strength, but certain ppl conveniently forget that 😒.
Zigzag would've been just another ship I don't pay attention to. Thank their insane fandom, especially the Get0 stans, for being the major cause of my intense dislike for this ship, however. Their toxicity towards other shippers (esp my fandom), misinformation, & misinterpretations of Gojo's & Get0's characters have solidified this ship as a MAJOR NOTP for me. I can't stand it with every fiber of my being. 😬
This meme encompasses that:
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They act like they're canon when they're not. There's literally NO canon evidence to support their ship. Everything they claim as evidence has been debunked & has a shounen-esque explanation for it. They choose to ignore it, however, & it doesn't help that big accounts on Twitter, Tik Tok & other platforms use zigzag for clout & spread lies 🙄. All they really have are the three M's: mistranslations, misinformation, & misinterpretations 💀.
They can ship in their own lane but these freaks go out of their way to harrass others, even fanartists of other Gojo ships & neutral translators. Then they go & victimize themselves when they get called out 🙄. They like to act innocent & blame others but everyone knows it's always them who start things. It's no wonder they've made enemies of every corner of the JJK fandom. They may have the numbers but they're surely in the same boat as the rest of us shippers 🤷‍♀️. We're all in Delulu Land.
They hate Utahime for no reason other than that she's shipped with Gojo. You might not believe the insane things I've seen them say about her. Despite her being a minor side character, & her only screentime has been to help others, esp Gojo, they hate on her as if she was the main villain. Heck, not even Sukuna gets this much hate from them 💀. They spite-ship her with her bestie Shoko or even that bum Kusakabe just to "get her out of the way" of their mid ship but they don't actually care for either ship. They even drag Gojo thru the mud when hating on GojoHime, mischaracterizing him by saying things like he hates women 💀. They hate on GojoHime as if it was the worst ship anyone could have in JJK.
They cannot stand how popular GojoHime is, especially in Japan (according to Pixiv, they're the most popular M/F ship & #6 overall in JJK 👀).
They also have the audacity to claim they care more about Utahime than us GojoHime fans do. They say we mischaracterize her & how dare we ship her with a man she hates? Like?? Where is their Utahime content, like fanart, headcanons & theories? When do they ever talk about her unless it's to hate on her & try to discredit our ship? I've heard they even villainize her in their zigzag fics, make her OOC 💀. But they understand her better? 🙄
It really comes to show that they genuinely see Utahime as a threat 🤣. But why, tho, if they claim that GojoHime has nothing to stand on? That it doesn't make sense? 👀 Why are they so insecure if they're "so canon"?
They also feminize Get0 & have made some very disturbing posts, yet they hate on female characters? Those that "get in the way" of their non-canon mlm ships? Even Gojo self-shippers hate on Utahime but are okay with Get0? 🙄 I know this word gets thrown around a lot but these ppl are misogynists...
Zigzags should go read actual BL instead of self-queerbaiting with a battle shounen manga 💀. They're as delusional as Naruto & Sasuke shippers (and those 2 had at least a better written dynamic than Gojo & Get0 💀. Even Gojo & Sukuna had a more interesting dynamic than them imo 🤣).
It annoys me when even some GojoHime shippers include past/implied zigzag in their fics, & worse without tagging. I ignore the properly tagged ones & immediately drop the ones that aren't. I'm always on alert when I click on a fic & won't relax until I know it doesn't have any zigzag. 😕 It shouldn't be like this...
I'm also like?? You're ok with having Utahime be second choice in a GojoHime fic to a non-canon mlm ship?? I get it's the multishippers but still. 😒 Please tag them so I can stay far away from them 🙏.
Sorry for going on a full rant, haha. I really cannot stand that ship nor its shippers. This post is not about the sane shippers, btw, only the crazy ones. 😅
Anyway, Gojo likes older women & that's FACT. 😌
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ac-19 · 14 days ago
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Please more Jason Hayes and Drew Franklin imagines! I could read imagines about them all day🤪
Here's some Drew for you babe ❤️ more Jason coming soon 😉
Could be Part 2 of Friends or? Or could be read as a stand alone.
Messy - D. Franklin (Bravo 6)
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Summary: things get messy when you're you're on the same team.
My phone went off awakening me from the deep slumber I was in and I almost panicked when I saw an arm wrapped around my waist but I couldn't help but smile to myself as the events of last night came to my mind. 
"Morning."
His morning raspy voice made me want to take him right then and there again but instead I reached over and grabbed my phone off the nightstand.
"Let me guess, we're getting spun up?"
"We have to be at base in an hour for debrief but most likely."
Drew placed a series of soft kisses on my neck, and I smiled. 
"I'm gonna go take a shower."
He groaned. 
"You're such a buzzkill."
I chuckled as I wiggled out of his arms and grabbed a shirt that was laying on the ground and pulled it over my head. 
"You're more than welcome to join."
I walked across my apartment to my bathroom and turned the hot water on, and I chuckled when I heard footsteps heading my way. I pulled the shirt over my head and disposed of it on the ground, and stepped into the shower. Not a minute later, Drew's arms were wrapped around my waist and he was back at placing soft kisses on my neck which led to Drew's definition of a quickie, that almost made us late for debrief. 
"Thanks."
I walked into the debrief room followed by Drew, and all eyes were on us as I walked over to sit beside Sonny while Drew sat on the other side of the table. 
"Did you two get in together?"
I scoffed and shook my head as I leaned back in my chair. 
"Just because two people walk into a room together doesn't mean they drove in together, Sonny."
"But.."
I rolled my eyes.
"Drop it."
Blackburn walked into the room, and I was grateful because that meant I got away from Sonny's question for a small amount of time. The debrief went by quickly, and with the news of a month-long deployment hanging over our heads, we all headed out to get our affairs in order before leaving. 
"(Y/N/N) you and Drew both walked in with wet hair and..."
I took a deep breath as I turned around to face Sonny. 
"If you don't want me to out you and Davis to the rest of the team, you better think carefully on your next words."
"Copy that."
I nodded and turned on my heel and headed to the parking lot. I drove back to my apartment and packed a bag, did some laundry and threw out all my soon to be expired food before I headed back to base. I climbed on that plane and settled into a spot and grabbed my headphones and pulled them over my ears. Drew walked onto the plane last and completely ignored me which stung a bit, but I couldn't think about that right now, not with a month long deployment in front of us. 
After two weeks of deployment I finally came to the conclusion that Drew was in fact a one night stand kind of guy. I understand the whole team was around but there was no need for him to completely ignore me, like I somehow didn't exist to him anymore, but I couldn't feel those feelings right now so I pushed them deep down inside me and focused on my job. I was the first one through the doors and first one in the fight for the last two weeks of our deployment and I think Jason picked up that something was bothering me but he never came out and asked me about it. 
When we landed back in VA Beach, my first stop was the grocery store before I headed back to my apartment. I saw Drew's van parked halfway down the block, but I really wasn't interested in talking to him, except I didn't really have a choice when I found him standing outside my apartment door. 
"Can we talk?"
I scoffed as I unlocked my door and walked inside my apartment. 
"Oh, now you want to talk to me."
"Let me help you with those."
I pulled my arm away as Drew tried to grab my bags of groceries. 
"I've got it."
Drew nodded and followed me inside my apartment, and I didn't fight him on that. If we were gonna argue, I didn't want all my neighbors to be witnesses. 
"I'm sorry."
I nodded as I started unloading my groceries.
"(Y/N)."
I shook my head as I closed the door to my fridge and turned around to face Drew. 
"You ignored me for a month while we were deployed. I get the rest of the team was around but you acted like I didn't exist and you think what? Now that we're home I'm just gonna fall into bed with you again? I already made that mistake once, it won't happen again."
"Mistake?"
"Look Drew it's like you said, team relationships are messy. She should have never done this."
"If that's how you feel."
"I think you should leave."
Drew nodded and walked out of my apartment without another word. That was weeks ago now and unless absolutely necessary we didn't really talk to each other and team dynamic just wasn't there anymore so when I walked into base this morning I walked straight to Blackburn's office. 
"Petty Officer (Y/L/N). Come in."
I nodded as I walked into Blackburn's office and took a deep breath.
"I'd like to make the formal request to switch teams."
Blackburn furrowed his eyebrows.
"Did anything happen with Bravo?"
I shook my head. 
"No, I just want a change of scenery."
Blackburn nodded. 
"You know I have to talk to Jason about this."
I nodded. 
"I know."
"And if he denies the transfer, my hands are tied."
I nodded. 
"I understand, but if I know Master Chief Hayes he won't block my transfer."
Blackburn nodded. 
"You sure nothing happened?"
I nodded. 
"Yes sir."
"Okay. I'll talk to Master Chief Hayes about this later today, but are you good with staying on Bravo until a new spot opens up?"
I nodded. 
"Of course sir."
He nodded.
"Dismissed."
I nodded and walked out of Blackburn's office only to come face to face with Sonny and Omar. 
"(Y/N), feels like we haven't seen you in weeks."
I nodded. 
"Yeah, I've been busy."
Sonny nodded as he pointed to Blackburn's office. 
"Everything okay?"
I nodded. 
"Yeah. I'm gonna hit the gym, I'll see you guys later."
Omar nodded, and I scurried away without another word. I knew they were going to eventually find out about my transfer request, but I don't think I could talk about it with them right now. I went to my cage and changed into some workout clothes, but instead of going to the gym, I drove across town to the cemetery and walked over to Clay's grave. 
"Figured I'd find you here after the talk I just had with Blackburn."
I put my head down and sighed before I looked back at Jason.
"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to blindside you."
Jason nodded. 
"Does this have anything to do with whatever is going on between you and Drew? Don't think I haven't noticed things are tense between you two."
I shook my head. 
"This is for me."
Jason nodded. 
"I don't know what happened between you and Drew and really it's none of my business, but I don't want to lose you on my team. I'm not gonna block your transfer and force you to stay on the team if you want to leave but just know that I want you here."
I nodded as I took a deep breath and looked down at Clay's grave.
"Clay and I were at the top of our Green Team class and we were so competitive so when we both got a spot on Bravo we always had to one up each other and it was great while it lasted, but right now I just feel like the team isn't a family and I've actually been considering this since Clay's death."
Jason nodded. 
"Look, the team not vibing right now has probably more to do with me than anything. Clay always knew how to push me, in the right ways and ever since he died I think we're all having a tough time adjusting, but we're gonna get back to the Bravo we were before."
I nodded. 
"Just think about staying okay?"
I nodded as Jason squeezed my shoulder and walked off. The tears welled up in my eyes as I looked down at Clay's grave. I really wish he was here right now to give me advice, probably a scolding, too, but mostly, I just wanted a hug from my best friend. After sitting at Clay's grave for way longer than I probably should I head back to my apartment and was stunned when I saw a bouquet of flowers laying by my apartment door. I looked around, but there was no one around, so I picked them up off the ground and picked the card that was in the flowers. 
"meet me at the Bulkhead tonight please."
I recognized Drew's handwriting and I sighed as I unlocked the door and walked inside my apartment.  
I debated not going, but ultimately, I got myself ready and settled onto a dark blue pockla dot sundress, which showed off some cleveage and my white converses. I quickly did my makeup and curled my hair. If nothing else, I was going to look hot tonight. 
I drove myself to the Bulkhead and sat in my car outside for a few minutes but I eventually walked inside and headed straight to the bar. I couldn't do this sober.
"Whiskey please."
"Add whatever she's drinking to my tab."
I looked over at Drew who was sitting by himself at the end of the bar. I grabbed my whiskey and walked over and sat down on the stool beside him.
"I didn't think you were gonna show up."
"Honesty I didn't either."
Drew nodded.
"You don't have to leave the team."
I sighed.
"Of course Jason told you."
I picked up my glass and took a big gulp out of it.
"Look I fucked this up, I should be the one to leave."
I shook my head.
"You deserve to be on Bravo."
"So do you."
I shrugged.
"Ever since Clay died I've been debating leaving Bravo, I guess this was the push I needed."
"Look I'm sorry."
"It's like we always said, team relationships are messy."
"This isn't about us being on the same team."
I furrowed my eyebrows and looked over at Drew.
"What is that suppose to mean?"
"Means that it scared the shit out of me when I woke up with you in my arms and I thought to myself, man I could see myself doing this everyday. I've never felt like that about anyone, so us being on the same team doesn't have jack shit to do with why I fucked things up for us."
I nodded.
"I get it."
"You do?"
I nodded as I traced the rim of my glass with my finger and looked over at Drew.
"I don't think Sonny ever mentioned it when he went on a rant about my life, but my ex cheated on me the night before our wedding. Some bullshit about having one last wild night before settling down so I might of blew this out of proportion too, I'm sorry. I wanted to protect myself from getting hurt like that again."
Drew nodded as he picked up his beer and brought it to his lips.
"That guy sounds like an asshole."
I smiled and nodded.
"That's something we both can agree on."
Drew downed whatever was left in his beer bottle and put it down on the bar before he looked over at me.
"So what now?"
"You want to get out of here?"
Drew smirked.
"You read my mind."
I smiled as I downed the rest of my whiskey and Drew threw some money on the bar and we headed towards the exit.
"Your place or mine?"
I laughed.
"No offence, but mine. It's actually got indoor plumbing."
Drew laughed.
"Fair enough."
We walked over to my car, and I walked over to the driver's side only to duck when I saw Sonny and Omar walking towards the entrance of the Bulkhead. If they saw Drew and I together we would never hear the end of it.
"Drew."
Drew quickly turned around and looked at Sonny and Omar.
"Didn't think we'd see you out tonight, it's been a while."
Drew nodded.
"Yeah well like you said it's been a while so thought I'd make an appearance tonight."
"Is that (Y/N)'s car?"
"Nah I don't think so, must be a car just like hers."
Sonny nodded.
"Right."
"Alright well I'm gonna go order us a round."
Drew nodded.
"I'll be right behind you guys."
I waited a few seconds until I heard the tump of the front door of the Bulkhead close.
"You're clear."
I chuckled as I stood up and looked at Drew.
"I have to go in there."
I nodded.
"You know where I live."
Drew nodded.
"Before you go, one thing."
"What's that?"
"You have to stay."
"I'm not going anywhere."
"On the team I mean."
I nodded.
"I know what you meant."
Drew smiled as he walked over to me and leaned down and planted his lips on mine. I slipped my hands around his waist and smiled against his lips.
"You've got some making up to do Drew Franklin."
Drew nodded.
"Right now I've got to go inside and have a drink with Sonny and Omar but later tonight I'm all yours."
I nodded.
"Don't be too late."
"Trust me after a few hours of Sonny and Omar I'm gonna be clawing my way out of here."
I chuckled.
"You better get in there."
"I gotta give my girl one more kiss before I go."
I smiled as I leaned up and planted my lips on Drew's. As risky as this was I couldn't help but feel the happiest I had been in a long time.
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notyoureve · 6 days ago
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Well, what can I say about my feelings after LiS:DE...
First of all... I still believe in the Chaseprice supremacy, yay!!! Even tho I didn't get the same impression of flirting in their conversation in the comments as the others😅 But at least they talked! My faves since 1st game! What a blessing to a shipper!
2) Thanks for the Caulscott content — not in the ways we as the MxN shippers could ever expect, but still🤣🤝 I just knew one of the D9 crew is one of us since that little background scene in BTS — what can I say, hinting twice (if not thrice) is almost canon to me🤪😁🤭
3) Vinh, freaking, Lang... The moment I saw Vinh in the sneak-peak before the release I predicted him to be the male love interest😜 I'm so grateful I was right — their progressing relationship was so beautiful... Even though their kiss was shorter than the kiss with Amanda, but damn... butterflies in my stomach were enough to say it was one of the most romantic scenes in the whole franchise. And the way he didn't want her to leave? Oh, my man, she has a way with leaving her almost boyfriends after kisses😭 And how happy he is after the game events when he finally sees her? And their hug? I'll never recover... I also believe in the DE Langfield supremacy, their interactions were absolutely one of the best parts of the game for me!!!
4) The pretty barista I didn't expect to love❤ I liked Amanda somehow, but I don't see her with Max at all... I'll say a very controversial thing, but the girl deserves so much better than Max😃 I would rather ship Ms Thomas with Ms Chen, and yet — they have some very nice scenes together. But even as a die-hard Caulscott shipper I'll say that Pricefield>>>Caulmas, especially after the way D9 just pushed the romance with her from the very first scene... The pushing was so cringy that I literally thought I would never like Amanda🤔 But here we are! She is fun and I love her, so she's my girlfriend, not Max's, okay?
5) Safi and Moses!!! Ooh, I loved them so much💔 Didn't like what they did to Safi by the end of the game, but she's a very great character besides all the other shit. And Moses is simply one of the best characters in the franchise, beat me. And his friendship with Safi is sooo dear to me🥺 Tbh, I expected much more from his role in the game and I believed at some point that he was helplessly in love with Safi. Not sure if this is for the best it turned out absolutely differently... And IMO Max x Safi/Max x Moses still have a better chemistry (even as a friends) than she and Amanda romantically😅 But there were definitely some sparks with Safield, yeaaah (it's very funny btw that it's the only sounding acceptable name of their ship, lmao)
6) The plot... What plot? Was it there? I missed it? Ah, it was so little and hasty it didn't deserve to become a BIG game... And yet! The game was much better in some ways I didn't expect, and so much worse at the same time((( There were some great ideas I truly liked, because they resonate with some of mine, but all the same they were ruined by some plotholes and inconsistencies — ooh, disappointment is strong here. But overall I liked the game! The music — one of the best parts of the finished product indeed🔥 The narrative was very lazy in the start and too rushed in the end, and it was the main reason what ruined the full experience to me😟 As for the characters... Well, most of them were cool, but there are so few of them comparing to the previous games. I honestly expected more of them, or at least more interactions with them... But let's end here!) Even if the plot wasn't perfect, there were plenty of moments I truly enjoyed.
7) The whole Chloe thing. I didn't expect much from the start (and I mean announcement), but was quite surprised we didn't saw her in the game besides photos. Breakup wasn't unexpected for me, but I suppose I can understand the feelings of the die-hard MxC fans. I won't say that I'm fully on their side, but still I understand what it's like🙏 And btw I had no problem with revoicing her by Rhianna since announcement, but... um... Something went strongly wrong — I absolutely fell in love with her work in BtS, and was absolutely shocked with what I've heard in DE🤯 She doesn't even sounds like herself((( What they did with her..? And why did she sound so emotionless? It was the only disappointing thing with Chloe for me. But perhaps there was some reason, if some theories will turn out to be true, who knows... But her haunting the narrative in the start and in the end was delightful in some ways, I won't lie.
8) The whole NOTMYMAX thing. Well, I can agree with some statments, but I do not see anything contradictory in her actions or her design. Even if it's Max-fkn-Caulfield, it doesn't make her less human and does not forbid her to grow and change, and especially doesn't forbid to become more serious and pathetic at the same time😃😆 Aaaand... Jesus Christ, Hannah Telle gave a simply outstanding performance — I missed her so much💔💔💔 Her returning to Max is also one of the best parts of the game and it's so heart-warming that her voice hasn't change at all🥺 And in the end: the bisexual queen returned — Max still is so Max it made me involuntarily smile throughout the game)))
I can endlessly speak of everything I think about the game, but there's so much to say I won't say no more at all😆😆 But all cringe and weak plotlines aside, some sides of DE were really great to explore! And since I'm more of an optimist, I will not rate the game just to not upset myself🤣
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dnpbeats · 13 days ago
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everything they've said so far regarding the subject has been that they don't wanna breech that line and jeopardise their privacy. every night on tour they talk about the importance of privacy and even though its kind of their brand and we know you know, they don't want to go that far. they've said it so many times so I don't know why everyone always thinks they'll hard launch
I was gonna make a joke about TIT but it’s a spoiler so I won’t bc I don’t wanna have to tag this whole post lmao
but anyway lol I understand what you are saying, I used to think the exact same thing. But I also think in the past year since the gaming channel comeback things have changed. Like, a year ago, did you think they’d ever play a game explicitly made for couples at all, let alone play it without being all like “🤪 we’re playing it as friends 🤪”. Did you think they would tell somebody asking for breakup advice that they “missed the memo” and say they aren’t qualified to give advice on that? I also think it’s important to remember that what dan said in BIG (and phil said in one of his q&as, I think in 2021) about not divulging any information about their relationship was like, more than a couple years ago at this point, and before they brought back the gaming channel and entered into this new era. I know recently they have said “no that’s private ❤️” in that interview but that doesn’t really count because if they are going to hard launch they of course aren’t gonna do that in a random magazine interview
I also said this in another post (I think when I was talking about marriage hill 💀💀 lmao) but I think too that the way they have talked about keeping their private life private is very indicative of the relationship they’ve had with their fans and the internet as a whole. Dan said in BIG he didn’t want to talk about his relationships bc he wants to be able to fuck up in private, and phil said that he wants to keep that to himself bc it’s hard to close that door once it opens. Those are points of view that come from years of fans and other ppl alike constantly trying to prove this and that about you and your relationship. I don’t mean this in a disparaging way, because I think it was accurate for the time they said these things, but it’s a view that is formed by poor boundaries with your audience. I think it’s obvious (to me) that in recent years but especially the past year, they really have gotten a grip on like, how to create boundaries btwn themselves and their content, their fans, the general public, etc. because they are more in control now of their public image than they ever have been, I wouldn’t be shocked if some of their fears they had before have dissipated. I think now they’ve figured out to share what they wanna share and how to be like “no stfu” when people come digging for more
so that’s all to say, I wouldn’t be at all surprised if their opinion on being explicitly out about their relationship has changed, because even if they come out with that they’d still feel like they can control how much of it they share
(also let’s say theoretically they actually are for real getting married, that’s public info, so if they wanted to come out on their own terms (i.e. not have their marriage leaked) they would have to hard launch before it)
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cardcaptorr · 1 month ago
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Do you support Israel or Palestine?
the way this question is phrased just lets me know how much yall have truly lost the plot. these are real peoples LIVES youre talking about, theyre not two sports teams pitted against each other.
I've lived in Israel for the first 12 years of my life; unfortunately I know what its like to live through war, I know what its like to run to the shelter and be a terrified lil kid thinking you could really just die. you guys have been treating this topic on social media like its the next oMGgg hashtag israel is sooo cancelled!!!🤪 and you can't even be blamed for having such a privileged standpoint because you literally can't even fathom what it's like to live through war.
with that being said, what's been happening in Gaza is x10000 more horrific than what is happening in Israel. Palestinians need support right now way more than anyone else. if you can't extend your empathy to ALL the innocent people that have been affected in this war, that's okay, Palestinians do need it more right now, more empathy, and all the support we can possibly give them.
I've been using this tumblr account since I was like 14 and I've always been vocal about not supporting the IDF/the israeli government. always talked about how much I absolutely hate Israel and hated living there. all this stuff might be news to you, but I've alwayssss had this view point, I've always been aware, and I've always wanted peace. I signed papers saying I will not be joining the IDF when I was 16, as soon as I got my american citizenship. moving here and being able to legally opt out of the IDF is a HUGE privilege.
every day that I live here I'm so grateful I'm here and not over there, I'm so happy I don't live in fear anymore. just because people in Israel absolutely have it better than the people in Gaza, doesn't mean they have it as good as you do living in the US. so if this war hasn't affected your life on a personal level, if you had the privilege of not knowing about this war until the past year, if you wouldn't have known about it at all if it weren't for social media and news outlets, if you don't have any loved ones in Israel or Gaza, be very aware of your privilege and be very grateful.
Instead of blindly hating the people of Israel and ragging on Israel on social media which is entirely fucking pointless, use that energy to show Palestinians your support instead. (also very ironic that hate is whats fueling this whole thing and you guys are choosing to spread unnecessary hate at a time like this...... just makes me lose faith in humanity tbh 🫤)
Find reputable organizations you can donate to (anything that directly goes to families over in Gaza, I think operation olive branch is a good one but please do some research about it first incase new info about it came to light, I can't remember), write to congress to ceasefire now (search it up on google you will easily find it, they also have prompts already written out you can copy and paste), support Palestinian-owned businesses and artists, look up if there are any Palestinian restaurants near you thet you can eat at, support Palestinian artists!! you can find more ways to help by looking it up on google or tiktok. spread some love today and do atleast one thing to support Palestinians today 💗 thank you if you read all this with an open mind :)
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migueloharaslave · 10 months ago
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WARNING!!!!!!!!! NSFW WILL OCCUR HERE SO SKIP IT IF U WANT OR WHATEVER (obv it's not the best cuz im still new to this pookies)🗣🤪🫶
"You always do this shit. Why do you keep asking me that?" Shawn groaned in annoyance as he slammed the refrigerator door.
"Well I can't help it. Sometimes it just feels like you don't even love me anymore. You haven't even took me on a date in a fucking year." You choked back tears as you studied his movements. Shawn then decided to walk up to you, he pushed you down onto a chair, pointing a finger at you. "You're a bitch. You constantly fucking say 'do you even love me anymore?' Of course I fucking do. I don't take you on dates because your always busy with that dumb job. Plus, I think your cheating. Who's that guy you've been texting.. Miguel? Yeah, you didn't think I saw that on your phone? What fucking guy asks a girl 'You free tonight?' You got something you wanna tell me?"
You stared up at him, you felt tears form in your eyes as you stared at him. "M-Miguel is a friend. He's just a friend I've met at work! I wouldn't cheat on you and you know that. I see him nothing more than a close friend. Sometimes we hangout and eat dinner together that's it." You choked back your tears as she you stared at him, fidgeting with the bottom of your shirt.
"Uh-huh. Whatever you fucking say. I'm going out, don't call me." Shawn scoffed as he stormed off out of the apartment, slamming the door behind him.
You stared off into the distance before bursting out into tears, all these bottled up emotions were now coming out. You've been dealing with this toxic relationship for so long.. You didn't know how to get out of it though. You felt so attached to him.. emotionally. He's the only boy to ever lay eyes on you, sure you may had a huge glow up since highschool, but deep down you still felt insecure. You sniffed as your last few tears dropped, then you heard your phone vibrate against the table, you picked it up and saw it was Miguel. You wiped your tears away as you cleared your throat and answered.
"Hey." You said in a soft voice.
"Hey.. You sound weird. Are you alright?" Miguel responded, furrowing his brows at the tone of your voice.
"Yeah, just allergies." You giggled.
"Yknow.. If anything is bothering you, you can always talk to me." Miguel spoke in a stern voice.
"I-.."
"Tell me."
"I don't know.. I just don't want anything bad to happen."
"Nothing is going to happen, I wouldn't let a thing happen to you. Talk to me."
"It's my boyfriend."
Miguel scoffed.
"What?"
"Nothing."
"Well anyways, Shawn is accusing me of cheating. Just because we hang out. He thinks just because you asked me if im free tonight that I'm hooking up with you or some shit, it's annoying. I would never cheat, I love him so much."
"Oh... I see. So, he's jealous of me?"
"I guess."
Miguel smirked, "He's jealous because I'm treating you the way any other man would treat a wonderful woman like you. 8 years together and still no ring, he's not worth it. Not at all."
"But I love him. He's just going through a lot.."
"And he takes his anger out on you."
"Well.. I don't mind."
"Are you being serious right now?"
"Yes, I'm not a good girlfriend to him anyways."
"Whatever, stop talking about him. Let's focus on us, hm?"
"Yeah.."
"Great. Soo.. still gonna go out with me tonight?"
"We're not going out together. We're two friends hanging out."
"Still, you wanna go? I have no plans.. "
"Yeah, I'm going still."
"Great, I'll pick you up."
"Okay, bye."
"Bye." You hung up.
"Love you too." Miguel whispered at his phone. He sighed and sat it down on the table. He chewed on the inside of his cheek. God, he was head over heels for you. Although you two barely even met, he felt so close to you already. Call him obsessed with the way he remembers every single detail. Miguel stood up, and walked over to a window, looking out at the city. He had a great paying job, which was the reason he would be able to afford all of those dates. And there should be no surprise that he lives in a penthouse, his apartment was black and red themed, definitely gave off a romantic vibe.
..You put on a white sweater with a casual jean skirt along with white legwarmers to give it a more cozy vibe, and black boots to top off the outfit, the outfit was cute so of course you did a half up half down hairstyle while slipping a white bow in your hair. You were fixing your lashes that you were putting on before you heard the doorbell ring, you gasped when you knew it was Miguel. "Shit!" You scattered around the room to find your purse, you snatched it up when you found it laying on the ground. You made sure to spray yourself with some perfume before dashing out to the door. You took a deep breath before opening it, looking up.. you saw Miguel.
Miguel.. That man knew how to take your breath away. He wore a white sweater and jeans.. just like you did. You glanced down at what was in his arms.. purple roses?
"Heh, seemed like we decided to match." Miguel chuckled to himself as he invited himself in ,walking past you  he looked around, peeked around the corner, then back at you. Scrunching up his nose he asked, "Where's that boyfriend of yours?"
"He went out.." You closed the door and bit your lip as you watched him, eyes examining his strong build before he handed you the flowers.
"Purple roses, just like you told me you liked. I thought since you liked the color purple and roses that'll I'll get you both instead." Miguel hummed.
"Thank you, they're beautiful." You smiled to yourself, you grabbed a empty vase, feeling it with a little bit of water. You sat it down on the middle of the table, taking the roses out of the plastic before slipping them into the vase smiling at them.
Miguel looked at you, his eyes seemed to narrow as he watched the way you moved across the kitchen. You were kinda like a swan, all graceful and soft with your movements better yet you could be a goddess. A goddess who deserves more in her life then some poor idiot. Miguel scoffed and looked off to the side as he just thought about your boyfriend, the way he treated you.. he hated it.
"What's wrong? You look upset." You looked at him before stepping close to him. Miguel turned his head to look back into those eyes of yours, he licked his lips as he felt his throat go dry.
"Nothing." Miguel closed his eyes and sighed, that vanilla perfume you wore was starting to drive him crazy. "Let's go, Hopefully you don't mind walking. It's not too far from your apartment."
"Fine with me." You smiled.
You two made your way out of the apartment making your way down the streets of Nueva York, the streets were crowded so you held onto Miguel's arm as in hopes to not lose him. Soon, you two made it to the restaurant. It seemed to be a fun little colorful spot filled with laughter and a live jazz band playing.
Your eyes widened with excitement at the vibes this whole place gave off, it was so colorful.. it smelled absolutely amazing, there was nothing but happiness all around. You and Miguel found a spot to sit next to near the band so you could watch them play.
Miguel pulled out your chair, when you sat down, he pushed it in before sitting down himself. He watched you as you smiled watching the band play, seeing your smile.. the way your smile stretched across ear from ear, the way your dimples showed. It felt like he was trapped. Trapped in this curse you had put on him, he bit his lip as you looked over at him, you two locking eyes. He felt his heart pound in his chest, only God knows how long he has been staring at you.
You looked up as a waiter walked over with a big grin, handing you two a menu. "Hello, hopefully you two are enjoying your evening so far. I'll be your waiter, any drinks I can start you guys off with. We have soda, water, some wine.. and don't miss out on our little deal for couples!"
"Oh we're not a couple. Just friends." Miguel cleared his throat, you nodded your head in agreement.
"..Oh. Well, how about you skip over that deal." The waiter chuckled nervously.
"Uhh.. I'll have a coke. You, Miguel?" You smiled at him.
" I'll have iced tea." He looked back at you.
"Okay, okay.. I'll get those ready right quick!" The waiter walked off.
"Thank you for bringing me here. I like it.. It's been awhile since my boyfriend and I been out together, it just feels nice to not be trapped in that apartment." You sighed as you looked into the distance.
Miguel reached his hand across the table, placing his hand on top of yours. He dragged his thumb across the back of your soft hands. "Leave him."
"What?" Your frowned at him. "That's a weird thing to say." You laughed.
"No, I'm being serious."  Miguel squeezed your hand, "I.. I think I'm in love with you. You're so beautiful and just overall perfect, someone like him doesn't deserve you. I can treat your better, I wanna be yours."
You stared into his eyes as you listened to his love confession, you shook your head. "No.. No I can't. Miguel.. I have feelings for you too but I just can't leave Shawn. He's.. He's my boyfriend, he's the only guy I've ever been with."
"Let me be the second and last guy you'll ever be with."
"Miguel." You cocked a eyebrow at him.
"Y/N." Again, he rolled your name off of his tongue in such a way that it made your body ache for him.
The waiter came over and sat your drinks down, holding up her notepad as she smiled at you both. "What can I get for ya?"
..About a good hour and a half later, you and Miguel were walking down the street. "Wanna come over to my place, maybe we can watch a movie or two..?"
"Sounds nice" you smiled softly.
"Great. Let me call a uber."
And after a good ten minutes, you finally arrived at his place. When he opened the door, you gasped. "Oh my god.. It's like a vampire lives here." You joked, looking around. Everything was so nice, way better than your old apartment. You started to walk around, dragging your hands along the wall as you made your way over to the window that overlooked the city. It was night, so the city lights were so bright, everything looked like dream as if it could take your breath away.
Miguel followed you, moving to stand right behind you. "Nice, isn't it?"
"Yeah.." You whispered, looking up at him.
Miguel brushed a strand of hair out of your face as you two locked eyes, his lips parted as his heart nearly skipped a beat. He felt as if his heart was running laps around his lungs as if it was going to do a back as if.. and something soft touched his lips before he knew. Suddenly, his hands found their way to your waist, pushing you closer.
You wrapped your arms around Miguel's neck, closing your eyes as you leaned into the kiss. It was so passionate, you had to part your lips just to deepen the kiss. The feel his hands on your waist was driving you crazy.
Suddenly, Miguel pulled away, He stared into your eyes. "God you drive me crazy.."
"Where's your bedroom?" You asked with a smirk on your face. Suddenly your at home life didn't exist, suddenly Shawn didn't exist. Suddenly Miguel was the only man you wanted, suddenly.. you were in his bed.
You two continued to kiss, practically trying to eat each other's face off at this point. You were desperately lifting Miguel's shirt up, trying to get a glimpse of those muscles. Miguel pulled away, lifting up his sweater and tossing it aside. He exposed those strong abs along with those strong pecs, god the way his body slimmed down at his waist honestly drove you crazy. You bit your lip as you caressed those strong arms of his giggling as you sat up, allowing Miguel to take off your sweater too.
Miguel leaned in, pecking kisses along your neck. He mumbled soft praises along your tender skin, hands on your waist dragging down to your skirt. You couldn't help but feel desperate, the way he unbuttoned your skirt with ease, nearly tearing it off he finally toss them aside, exposing your panties to him. Miguel kissed your ankle before pecking kisses down to your inner thigh, he looked up at you with hungry eyes. He licked his lips as he leaned forward, catching your lips in a kiss once again as he brought his hand down, pressing his palms against your clothed cunt
You let out a small whimper in response which caused him to chuckle. You felt your body heat up as you started to grind your hips against his hand, god how long has it been.. your boyfriend hadn't touched you in what felt like forever, better yet he never made sex feel this exciting. Miguel's pulled out off the kiss to catch his breath, his eyes narrowed as he stared into your eyes. He hummed as he leaned down, pecking kiss down until he reached your lace trimmed panties, he pulled them down gently. He looked up at you, smiling softly. "Tell me when I should stop. I want to make you feel good, not hurt you. You're everything to me.. I want you to have every good thing in this world, mi amor." His words was so smoothing and comforting, the way he talked drove you crazy.
You bit down on your lip as you sat up on your elbows watching the way he propped your legs up on his shoulder. You gripped down onto the sheet when you felt him lick at your slit, your voice hitched when his tongue started to circle around your clit. "M-Miguel.." You whispered, bringing you hand down to grip onto his hair as he started to gently suck on your clit. Miguel pulled away and giggled, dragging his tongue along your clit before pushing it inside of you drove you crazy  the way he gently pushed in it out, flicking against your pulsing walls.. everything was pushing you to the edge.
Suddenly, Miguel grew bold, which is exactly why he pushed a single fingers inside, watching your reaction before he slipped a second inside. "Oh g-god.." You cried as you leaned your head back, your walls clenching around his fingers. Miguel started to thrust his fingers in and out at a gentle pace, then he started speeding up as he leaned in and started sucking your clit again. He looked up at you, watching the way you reacted to the way he made you feel.. you were so beautiful, the way your chest heaved when you took a deep breath.. he couldn't help but chuckle.
Suddenly, his pace quickened even more, his pace quickened suddenly and you let out a cry. "M-Miguel..!" You cried out his name, gripping onto the silk sheets of his bed, wrapping your legs around his head as you groaned. "I'm.. I'm gonna c-come.." You whined. You felt your thigh twitched, biting down on your lip you threw your head back, crying with pleasure. Suddenly, just as you were getting close, it all stopped.
Miguel had pulled away, "Not yet." He spoke softly, leaning in and gently kissing you, making you taste yourself on his lips. "But.. Please, Miguel.." You whined.
Miguel smirked as he leaned over, "You might as well get ready.." He grabbed a condom from the night stand, "It's gonna be a long night."
..After a night of nonstop loud moans and the sound of skin slapping against each other, it was finally morning.. and oh boy you woke up to something crazy. Not Miguel, but your boyfriend or.. ex spam calling your phone. You groaned as you sat up, glancing over at Miguel who was still sound asleep. "My god.." You hissed as you felt your thighs feel numb as you tried to stand up. Maybe you should start doing yoga again because you were not ready for this. You grabbed your phone and sighed, you stood up and answered the phone.
"WHERE THE FUCK ARE YOU? You haven't been answering your fucking phone, You weren't at the fucking apartment. Your friends said you aren't with them. Where the fuck are you? Huh? Answer me damnit." Shawn grinned his teeth to try and keep his composure.
Just as you felt tears fill up your eyes.. and just as you were about to speak, Miguel snatched your phone. "Hello?" Miguel asked.
"Who the fuck is this? Why the fuck are you with my girlfriend?"
"..The same guy she told you not to worry about." Miguel hung up the phone.
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princessefemmelesbian · 10 months ago
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A PSA
Okay I normally don't make posts about TERFs like these because I prefer to reblog them from trans people who know more about this stuff then I do but I just gotta say this, and if I'm being for fucking real I can't believe this even has to be said:
Stop posting screenshots of TERF posts and saying "op was a terf so I'm stealing this post! 🤪"
Seriously, stop it. You're not doing anything good by taking TERF talking points and reposting them to your blog. All you're doing is allowing TERF rhetoric to continue to spread and sanitizing it so that people become desensitized to it and don't recognize actual TERF rhetoric when they see it.
When you screenshot a TERF post and say "op was a TERF" all you are doing is validating TERF points whether you agree with them or not. Because every post a TERF makes, even if it seems benign, is connected to their rotten, transmisogynist ideology. You cannot divorce TERF statements from their true intentions. I think a lot of TMEs on this site really underestimate the fact that TERF is a harmful hate movement. Every statement a TERF makes, even if it seems harmless or actually feminist, is ultimately going to be tarnished by the fact that they are made with the intention of targeting trans women and wanting them dead. If a post is about how men are awful or are "raised" to be a certain way and is made by a TERF, then congratulations, you just found transmisogynistic rhetoric that is actually about trans women and their apparent "male socialization". If a post is about how lesbians should be allowed to not like men and how men are forcing themselves onto lesbians, but a TERF made it, then it's not actually a lesbian-friendly post. It is a transphobic post about how transfem lesbians apparently "prey" on cis lesbians(which they also think straight trans men are, let's make that very clear) by merely existing. Same for any post about the word queer or the beauty industry or periods or anything of the like. Even if they don't explicitly say it, TERFs are inherently lumping trans women in with(cishet) men and trans men in with women/lesbians and THAT is the true meaning of the post. You're not making it any better by reposting it from them.
TERFs know exactly how to make their posts seemingly benign and genuinely positive on the surface so that people get sucked in to thinking that they are truly for the feminist cause and actually have good points to make. But all of it ultimately serves the purpose of continuing transmisogyny, and when you post screenshots of their posts and go "I really wanted to reblog this post but op was a terf so I'm stealing it! 😇" all you are doing is giving terfs a platform and saying that we should listen to them. You're exposing trans women to beliefs and opinions of people who ultimately wish to harm them and do NOT have the same innocent intentions that you believe they have from looking at the post at first glance. You are not helping women. You are not helping feminism. You're internalizing TERF rhetoric, and you're allowing other people to internalize it, too.
It's one thing if you don't realize a post was made by a TERF before you reblog it, and then you delete it afterwards. But if you know someone is a TERF and intentionally repost their vile, sickening rhetoric wrapped up in pink feminist bows and go "I like the message of this post but op is a terf so 🤷🏾‍♀️" then you may as well be reblogging it directly from them, because you're still agreeing with TERFs at the end of the day.
What can you do instead? You can reblog feminist posts from amazing and intellectual trans women who actually are genuine about the cause and actually know what they're saying. They have way better views on feminism and misogyny and lesbophobia and the patriarchy then a radfem who thinks woman=vagina and man=penis ever will, trust me. Uplift their voices instead of stealing from conservative hate groups. It really is that simple.
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oliviaswrldd · 10 months ago
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𝐓𝐨𝐱𝐢𝐜 𝐋𝐚𝐰 - 𝐋𝐚𝐰 𝐨𝐟 𝐀𝐭𝐭𝐫𝐚𝐜𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧 ✰
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Hi guys, in this post i want to talk about Law of Attraction and compare a little bit to Law of Assumption.
I want to point out that there's a lot of irony and yes, maybe i'm making fun of law of attraction. But sorry it's ridiculous.
I worked hard on this post and i tried my best to explain how law of attraction is simply limited so reblogs will be appreciated to reach with this post to more people!
I'm so glad that first i discovered Law of Assumptiom because when i dived with curiosity into law of attraction it left me so, so confused.
𝐅𝐄𝐄𝐋𝐈𝐍𝐆 ✰
So one of the "rules" in law of attraction is that you attract what you feel.
If you feel bad, unhappy - this is what you attract to your life. Your feelings are main determinant what surrounds you and creates your life and circumstances. - that's what law of attraction is basically saying.
And don't get me wrong here. In law of assumptiom we are talking about feeling either but it's totally different meaning.
We are saying about feeling it as a person who have their desire, who KNOWS that have it despite what they see in 3D.
Feeling = Knowing
But in law of attraction they are talking about feeling as emotion.
Feeling = Emotion
You need to feel happy to attract all the good things.
While in law of assumption you can feel unhappy, sad, cry whole day in bed, but still manifest whatever you want just by knowing that you have it. Periodt.
𝐂𝐎𝐌𝐌𝐔𝐍𝐈𝐓𝐘 ✰
This is funny, because law of attraction community is so sooo limited. I was in couple groups on amino and facebook and they all said the same things. For example:
You can manifest money but you need to take an action. Go to work.
Wow, i didn't know this is how manifestation works. Go to work and you'll manifest money. 😂
Of course in law of attraction you can manifest ONLY certain things. When you'd say that you want to manifest different eye color, they would say how this is impossible and you just CAN'T do that. 🧍
People there would tell you how you can attract good things into your life but you need to be in good mental state, always have high vibrations and think positively, otherwise you'll attract all the bad situations in your life. Interesting...
𝐒𝐔𝐁𝐋𝐈𝐌𝐈𝐍𝐀𝐋𝐒 ✰
Other common thing in law of attraction are SUBLIMINALS. Well, in law of assumptiom we also use subliminals and i still feel like situation with subliminals are very similiar in both - because people relying so much on these... (i made post about subliminals related so ya can check)
But let's talk how subliminals are used in law of attraction. People have to listen to subliminals to raise their vibrations (not only for this but mostly!) Because if you are not surrounded by good vibrations you CAN'T manifest! 🤪
Listen to this subliminal 6738289 hours everyday for 99 years and you'll see the results!
This is the most common thing i see in law of attraction. You need to do xxx in order to manifest xxx. If you won't listen to this, your (certain) wishes won't come into fruition. :(( ah, i'm sad.
While in law of assumption we are listening to subliminals to just remind that we have our desire. Not to get. I will listen to this subliminal and then i will manifest xyz. How you can get something when you already have it? You want it. You got it. Easy as it sounds.
Unfortunately in law of assumption community, still many people paying other bloggers tons of money for subliminals (i won't mention one *cough*) to enter the void state, to have better self-concept (it's not even needed to manifest lol), to manifest xyz, to shift... Bro, you don't have to do that. I don't even want to imagine how does it look like in law of attraction community...
𝐀𝐅𝐅𝐈𝐑𝐌𝐀𝐓𝐈𝐎𝐍𝐒 ✰
Just like with the subliminals, situation with affirmations is almost identical.
You need to affirm 588738 times, robotically.
Of course in law of assumption we also use affirmations but depending on what our ASSUMPTIONS are. If someone like to affirm, then they are doing it. If they rather listen to subliminals they're doing it. It depends what each of us rather, what is more comfortable for us.
But in law of attraction... Well
Repeat that affirmation for whole week and watch how your life changes!
I'm sure at least one of you, guys heard that sentence. 🧍
You need to do something in order to get. You affirm to get something. Certain amount of time.
You rely on this affirmation and repeat it as you'll forget your identity.
Why i called law of attraction toxic.
Because it is. You are giving away your power to external things. You are doing certain things to get. You need to always think positively and have abundance mindset. You can manifest only certain things. Where is the point here? Not without reason, this law is called law of attraction. But it's totally useless and highly limited law which won't get you anywhere.
I am aware that some people won't agree with me, but that's okay. Or maybe there is a someone who is into law of attraction but after reading my post will finally wake up? I hope.
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Sorry for any grammar mistakes. Eng is not my native language but i tried my best to write this the most clear i can. :)
Have a nice day/night 🖤
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