#and of course you may use them differently!
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As I understand it, "sentient" most likely became the more familiar term because it was relevant in animal rights contexts. "Sentient" basically just means 'able to experience sensation'. Experience/Consciousness, the basic ability to recognize a distinction between internal and external sensations (hence why it's pretty much equivalent to 'self-awareness', literally awareness of a 'self'), was argued as the prerequisite for the capacity for suffering, so demonstrating an animal was sentient was part of arguing for better treatment of those animals. Of course, other people would try to demonstrate that an animal wasn't sentient in order to claim it was ok to do anything to them - that they were just biological automatons, in effect. A bad argument, of course, with just one reason why being that you can't really prove the absence of sentience. In scifi, characters would say things like 'you can't do that/let that happen to a sentient being', and it was a reasonable thing to say! Just that in context those 'sentient beings' would tend to be sapient as well, because that's more interesting in fiction. From there it got copied by other authors and got twisted from 'a creature as capable of suffering and of being mistreated as a human is' to 'a creature mentally equivalent to a human'. "Sapient" means having wisdom, or more specifically the capacity for abstract thought - the ability to both hold onto information and to put different pieces of information together to create projections and predictions independent of prior experience. A human who had never experienced a cave collapse may still deduce that something must hold up the roof of a cave, that that something is probably the cave wall, and that digging the cave deeper may lead to the roof falling in. A crow can see that when a human's shoelaces are untied, they tie them again - so if it unties a human's shoes, it can deduce, they'll be distracted enough for the crow to steal something. Sapience is the ability to see underlying principles across different events, to calculate and draw new conclusions. This and this, therefore that.
Of course, it can be hard to prove the absence of sapience, too, because sapience is something you do, not really something you are. A lot of humans spend most of their days not demonstrating use of their sapience at all, just following instinct and training patterns, if sophisticated ones. If you don't have a reason to use it, or something to use it with, it's hard to demonstrate that you're sapient - and if you do demonstrate it, it's easy to mistake for possibly being just instinct or training.
I'd say cut some slack on use of sentience and sapience as words, because a lot of the time they're used to talk about ethics and mistreatment, and for that, sentience is the relevant quality. Sapience doesn't really mean you're more or less capable of suffering, except maybe in that you have an enhanced capacity for anxiety, fear and emotional suffering from being able to recognize dangers and implications more easily.
More recently, some scifi has started using the word 'sophont', which also basically just means having wisdom (it's the same 'soph' as in sophist or philosopher). It's mostly a synonym for 'a sapient being', but in my experience has some stronger connotations of having transmitted knowledge, collective culture and technology.
i am on my knees tears running down my face knuckles raw and bleeding and BEGGING people to learn the difference between sentient and sapient
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Hi there! Could I request HCs of Optimus Prime, Prowl, and Ratchet (separately) from Transformers Animated with a Cybertronian![S/O] [Romantic] [Gender Neutral] who is an Autobot specialized in Special Operations?
Cybertronian![S/O] is a commander of their own Special Ops team back on Cybertron doing missions ranging from hostage rescues to combat. They tried to visit Earth with the Elite Guards whenever possible to see their respective partner(s) since they missed them.
They may be misunderstood as tough, scary, and dangerous at first glance, sometimes mistaken for a Decepticon before showing their Autobot insignia. Even mentioning their designation (name) sends shivers down anybot’s struts (backs).
In actuality, they’re kind, sweet, and less serious when off duty and can take a joke.
Optimus | Prowl | Ratchet [Animated]
In which their s/o is the commander of the Autobot's information operations and visits Earth to see them.
Reader is: Gender Neutral | Cybertronian | Autobot.
Optimus
Despite all his sucking up to the commander, Ultra Magnus, few knew Optimus looked up to more than just the one
He wasn't under your authority, but you were still a commander, and he was so utterly proud of you for amounting to something
He hadn't seen you since his touchdown on Earth, but you'd been checking on him far more frequently to make sure he was okay
Initially, he doesn't tell you about the cons and tells you it's just human villains because he knows you're busier than he could ever imagine and doesn't want you to worry even more
But you do find out through Ultra Magnus when it's reported, and it only takes a week before you can find an excuse to step away from your position to see him
Your arrival on a small, dark ship catches the attention of Bee and Sari during one of their excursions, and they both go running back to their team, claiming more Decepticons have arrived
When he does go to investigate, he's pleased to see you step from the ship, but your name coming from his mouth only seems to unnerve the others more
"Whoa! Prime, you know them???"
"More than know, actually. Everyone, meet my conjunx."
Jaws are dropping
Very quickly they get to learn your and Prime's history together, how you met in elite guard training, how he saved your life, how different you were than the rumors made you to seem
"Don't be fooled; they're very scary when they need to be."
Prowl
Prowl, like most things in his life, kept any mention of you to himself
After all, the others on his team liked to pry, and you were something precious to him; someone no one understood but him
Not only that, but he was worried if he brought you up, someone might try to contact you, and he knew that above all, your missions were at their peak, one after another
It didn't take anyone else, though; his own silence and lack of disclosure eventually led to you deciding to visit him yourself, which culminated in him literally waking up to the others screaming about a con at the base
He knew the very sound of your spark hum apart from any other noise and immediately told everyone else to calm down
Of course he's happy to see you, but he really wishes you wouldn't see him at such a low point
Stuck with a team of nobodies on a planet one hundredth the size of the one you protected
But you never cared about any of that; you were just happy to see your bot again, and beyond all the war stuff, he was happy to see you, too
He's very protective of you and doesn't let you spend too much time with the others because they're 'too annoying to deserve your attention'
Ratchet
Ever since the mission he carried out with you to save Arcee, he'd felt shame in comparing himself to you
Ratchet used to be on your team before you commanded it, but he eventually strayed into his current position while handling his guilt
Guilt or not, he admittedly hated that you'd taken up such an important position because it meant you had a bigger target on your back
Communicating with you poses a danger to you, so he's reluctant to send much your way and just accepts transmissions from you, which only Prime manages to find out about
Ratchet doesn't care if you're scary or not, if you're strong or not; he just wishes he could keep you from being known, keep you safe
Against all his wishes, you continue to be a more important link in the war effort, and you are the one protecting him in the relationship more than anything
Ratchet manages to keep your first few visits to Earth a secret, but it doesn't take much more for the others to meet you, especially after they had to help chase Lockdown off from trying to take you in
He doesn't have much of an ego, but he does like seeing the younger bots fawn over how cool his s/o is
And hearing them talk about how everyone fears you, well, it makes him feel just a bit more certain that you can protect yourself and that he shouldn't worry as much as he does
Author's Note - I have actually been rewatching all of Animated so, perfect timing! Blitzwing forever tho <3
#aiko writez#transformers#headcanons#transformers x reader#transformers animated#tfa x reader#tfa#tfa optimus#tfa prowl#tfa ratchet#tfa optimus x reader#tfa prowl x reader#tfa ratchet x reader#x reader
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˚🕯️Run,ma belle ˚🕯️
*pairing: Vampire Jungwon x human reader (rivals to lovers)
*tags: Blood,bites,fluffy, kiss, teasing, a little smut, horny vampire
* synopsis: The vampire leader may have as his soul mate any human being or something dark will be wedded among the enhypen group.
This first one-shot is formed by Jungwon, with the next chapters you will also discover the other members
* word count: 5k (Tell me if you like this kind of stories:)
—REBLOG if you enjoyed
© cutehoons02 all rights reserved 2024.
(English is not my native language)
It had been almost a year since one of the most prestigious mixed universities in the world had granted hospitality to live and study with vampires, wizards, elves, shape-shifters; but there were rules that anyone had to follow. Do not start fights inside the campus, respect any person especially human beings because they have no magical or superhuman power, and do not force love between non-human beings and human beings, You could understand very well if a couple was really in love especially if this was composed of a human being and a hybrid, especially between vampires/ humans. Y/n was accepted in that university because he was brilliant and his dream was to become a journalist on that campus, there were the best courses but also because fate wanted to meet and understand the leader of vampires so that you could fall in love with a human being, As had happened to his parents but with a better fate.
Y/n had been put in a room with a girl with human appearance and was super happy when he saw her for the first time because who entered that university had to pass tests not only related to the subject studied but also on magical creatures and especially you had to pass a defense exam and Y/n was astonished to pass all the phases, For his misfortune or good luck his roommate was a vampire and discovered it in a way as unpleasant but funny; wanted at all costs to try one of the lipsticks because she always had beautiful red lips but when she wore that lipstick she discovered that that lipstick was not artificially colored but with real blood that her roommate loved sucking from another vampire and who loved to show off to the whole campus.
Y/n was not very afraid of vampires because his roommate had tried in every way to get her used to that world and also make them know as many vampires as possible, including the group of his closest friends, were called "enhypen". After all, they had a kind of band and sometimes did concerts especially live on various social platforms and to his amazement were very famous. Still, people who didn’t live on campus thought they were just ordinary students doing funny ballet as a hobby or writing vampire-related pieces. Instead, they were real vampires and the less they were in contact with human people the better, because they seemed to all effects of simple humans but they were not at all, Each of them had special powers and insecurities that they tried not to show but when you think you are a superior creature to humans they could vent at any moment even if they managed to control their powers.
The enhypen was composed of 7 vampires all with different ages except the trio composed by Sunghoon, but the most powerful of all 7 was not the oldest in the group but one of the smallest members, although they were only a few years or months apart all respect Jugwon from the group members to the vampires on campus, all creatures and especially the few humans that populated the student campus. Jungwon loved to make everyone comfortable with his presence and his feline appearance especially the humans, not because he respected him but only for what had been suffered by his mother, She hated to have been conceived by a human being but at the same time, her mother had made her know the life of a human being with all the emotions that could be perceived and have, As a child, he loved being human but when he saw his mother in death he wondered why she had not chosen to turn into a vampire but maybe he knew that he could not love for hundreds of years that vampire who saved her hundreds of years ago, He loved his mother much more than his father but he was turned into a vampire because he wanted to live for hundreds of years but after that transformation, his heart no longer beat for anyone but maybe near there was a person who slowly was making sense Jungwon but he hated her with all his heart.
Y/n was a normal human girl who knew too much about magical creatures and her vampires and his bad luck as if someone on it was making him crazy if she found out without wanting to a lot of lessons that she had chosen to follow that year, his roommate and this thing did not play in his favor and every time he tried to ignore it if he found it in his field of vision, Jungwon did not like it because it was extremely intelligent and many times they also took the same score in tests, This made him angry. After all, he was seriously the most intelligent among all vampires and his power was to memorize everything in a few seconds but Y/ n sometimes passed it in tests.
"Well guys, i would like to propose a little collaboration between you, you know that the job of the journalist is a job where you are never alone so i would assign you a small project where you will work in pairs. The level of all of you is extremely high so there will be couples less capable than others but a couple that i am very curious to discover is the one formed by Jungwon and Y/n, you are the best students and i expect much from you two and in my opinion, you would be a perfect couple." You looked at Jungwon and he was giving a look of contempt to the professor and then to you, you never understood that boy, when he saw you always turned away or if you crossed him in the corridors changed ways, But in class, he loved to throw punches or beat you in tests; sometimes you wanted to be a vampire because Jungwon had the power to memorize everything instantly but other times it was nice to be a human and be able to beat him with your skills.
"Well guys, i would like to propose a little collaboration between you, you know that the job of a journalist is a job where you are never alone so i would assign you a small project where you will work in pairs. The level of all of you is extremely high so there will be couples less capable than others but a couple that i am very curious to discover is the one formed by Jungwon and Y/n, you are the best students and i expect much from you two and in my opinion, you would be a perfect couple." You looked at Jungwon and he was giving a look of contempt to the professor and then to you, you never understood that boy, when he saw you always turned away, or if you crossed him in the corridors changed the ways, but in class, he loved to throw punches or beat you in tests; sometimes you wanted to be a vampire because Jungwon had the power to memorize everything instantly but other times it was nice to be a human and be able to beat him with your skills. You went to Jungwon’s desk and watched him put his hand on his nose and make a disgusted face when he handed him the notebook with your ideas, you sniffed your wrists and maybe he did not like the scent of amber vanilla that you wore but your roommate had never bothered nor other vampires with whom you were in class. " Is there a problem with my perfume or is it just my presence that makes you feel like Yang Jungwon?" a small smile formed on his face and shivers of cold ran all over your body, you had always heard good things about Jungwon with humans but your sixth sense put you on alert when you were so close to him. " Don’t try to go over the line with me Y/n, i’ve never had you so close and i must be a little bit sensitive to your smell; things that i have already done with many human beings especially with girls" Roll your eyes because it looked so a puppy with those beautiful cat eyes but he had a cold heart and with you, he always behaved strangely " Don’t worry i don't want to know about your escapades with human beings, i came here to show you some topics that we could bring for the journalism project and i came up with an interesting topic for both you and me. How about talking about the fake news that we humans suffer in the vampire world and vice versa?" Jungwon put away all the material and surely had not heard anything you were saying because he was stuck chatting on the phone "Sure seems an interesting topic but now i must run away from you" You turned to watch him leave the room but after a few moments a cold presence was attached to you and shivers of cold poured into your body, Jungwon whispered in your ear and you would have been happier than ever without having heard those words come out of his mouth "But you want to be not me bitten is better if you change perfume because i don't like it, and if you are not your heart will beat no more not because you become a vampire but because i kill you. Write me on ig the day and at what time we have to be in the library, the more people there will be better it will be for you Y/n." You watched it disappear at the speed of light Jungwon and felt your heart beat wildly, surely telling you to make you scared; you had never heard of vampires that gnawed people, ok yes you had heard but in the term "bite" and that term was used mainly in sexual acts and Jungwon despised you so surely he wanted to scare you.
It had been a few days since you had seen Jungwon and your heart finally settled when you were near vampires, But every night nightmares of dark nightmares made their way into your mind and thoughts as if it were a bad joke of fate you always woke up sweaty and trembling at 3 or 3:30 at night, those hours were the periods of maximum paranormal activity and you always felt watched by someone but maybe they were just your paranoia. You had sent a message to Jungwon if he wanted to study with you for the project but obviously, he hadn’t answered, he had only visualized it and honestly, you were tired both physically and mentally of being behind that vampire, At the time you had sent by message you found yourself in the campus library; Soft lights ran through the entire corridor of the library and without wanting to find you studying in the less known area of the library but where you could study and feel at ease if you wanted to take small breaks.
A thud caught you by surprise and you watched Jungwon fall into the chair and put the computer in front of him, it was seriously beautiful had slightly wavy hair and some attached to his forehead, He wore a sweatshirt but how tight in the arms were it made his biceps stand out that every time you saw him they seemed more and more muscular and had a kind of makeup "Is this new to me the leader of the dark side of vampires, who wears eye-liner with a little bit of tinge to make his cat eyes stand out? Are you sure you’re a vampire and not a cat that turns to night?" a little laugh came out of his lips and you saw him protruding into the table until his face was a few centimeters from your "I like cats maybe even more than humans, they don’t need so much attention and love to be on their own exploring the world and surely have a smell better than your Y/n" You felt the tip of his nose attached to your neck and slightly felt your cheeks warm, he seriously looked like a cat sniffing you but didn’t seem so much to hate your smell as he always told you "Thank God you did not put that vanilla scent but the problem is that i really loathe your real smell as human 'Y/n" sunflower a moment to see it carefully sniff your neck and a slight redness formed in your cheeks, You pulled back your chair and looked at him badly "It doesn’t seem that much that you hate my neck especially the perfume that i emit, if it is more than five minutes that you smell me as if i was a feline looking for his lover" Jungwon when he heard your voice pulled back as if she was in trance from the smell you exhaled, would not confide it to anyone but they were all bullshit when he said that your smell was disgusting. Was literally the exact opposite, had already smelled you all over her body more than a year ago when she saw and heard for the first time in the classroom from study but put it away, but since you started having some lessons together he always became restless and only felt your smell in the classroom and because of that professor who had put you together to do that project he had to feel indifference and unpleasantness for you because no one had to understand that you had a strong power over him with your smell and did not dare to imagine how it was to have your blood between his lips and see you bent down and moan his name while he died on your neck with his vampire's teeth.
You watched for more than a minute Jungwon stared at you and with a snap in front of his eyes with your fingers he recovered from the trance he had while he sniffed you "Seriously Jungwon if you have a problem with me just tell me and we divide the tasks and before the presentation we start studying together if you can’t stand my presence or my smell so much, i never had any problems with other vampires and i also shared a course with your friend Hoon and he always behaved normally with me" Jungwon was seriously mortified by his behavior and couldn’t stand it either but the thing that made him most angry is hearing you talk about Sunghoon, because you called him Hoon and not Sunghoon? Hoon had always been attracted to vampires and never to humans. " There is no problem Y/n, just stay slightly further away as you are in class and everything will be fine, i want to work well on this project and get a good grade because i always dreamed of being a journalist and in this life, i would become one" seemed sincere for the first time and you put yourself in three chairs further away and started to study and program the project. After two hours you were seriously "in tune" If this could be called tuning be slightly apart you and Jungwon and text to understand your ideas even if you were in the same place but couldn’t speak out loud even if you were in a slightly isolated corner of the library. " Could you pass me that book on some fake news that came out about vampires in the human world, so i’ll do a little summary and then write the current ones especially those that came out with the advent of social media?" Jungwon unintentionally passed you before the book a sheet where he had written his ideas but to take it slightly graphed the tip of one finger and formed a slightly red patina, it had not even come out of the blood but i washed and licked immediately and your hand went immediately in the pocket of your sweatshirt. You didn’t have to rush to look at Jungwon but you saw him slightly whiter than usual and with dilated pupils "Run, ma belle otherwise, i can seriously bite your neck at this exact moment and suck your blood" For a few seconds you were full of fear but you had passed the physical test against vampires when they saw blood and ran right outside the library and you took refuge in the bar full of students where you could feel slightly safe when you saw your roommate With Sunghoon and Jake drink chocolate but you knew that in that cup there was also blood not entirely brown color had.
"Y/n you’ve already finished studying? It’s not like you to tell me that you missed your beloved favorite vampire!" you and T/n had a beautiful relationship even if you had discovered that she was a vampire you never made so many problems with her because she always respected you, made you feel comfortable while you were in the room together and ok sometimes left the envelopes of blood around the room but had never given you any problem.
"I wanted to drink a good chocolate with the cold that makes me out i seriously need but i must ask you urgently something about vampires" Sunghoon and Jake looked at you carefully and when they heard the question that you had made him a slight grin formed in his faces but a slight concern made its way into the minds of the vampires. " A vampire can always tolerate the smell of real blood? Especially if it does not come out of a wound, but why when Jungwon sees me always hurry to smell me, and when he smells my blood had light red eyes? Don’t tell me he wants to kill me i’m leaving this university, i hope to live for a while longer i don’t need to be bitten by a vampire who hates me" Sunghoon put a hand on your back to relax you and T/n took your hands slightly trembling to make you feel a little safe even if the contact between the cold of her hands and yours made your blood freeze but you could trust her.
"I think Jungwon is just stressed out and doesn’t drink his weekly blood Y/n, we live together but we are not attached to him 24h on 24h as once also because each of us has taken different paths of studies but i can assure you that it is due to the lack of blood in his body, calm that this evening we will make him drink and tomorrow he will be a "normal" person. "Let me just take away a curiosity, Jungwon has never tasted your real blood, Y/n?" You watched Jake and a laugh of terror came out from your lips "Why should Jungwon taste my blood, he despised me since the first day he saw me and i would not drink my blood from you vampires, especially in Jungwon". Jake nodded and looked at him with a worried face both Honn and T/l.
Jungwon was sitting contemplating the time lying in his bedroom bed, vampires hardly ever slept but he loved to take refuge in a safe place and that place was his room, He felt extremely weak but every time he tried to feel or drink blood from the bags that came into the blood bank each week, he had a rejection. He knew that he could not go on without drinking blood but since he had smelled for a few seconds the blood of Y/n had clicked in his head and thought only about her but especially about her smell. Heard the door of his room slamming and all 6 members invaded the view of his room and snorted "There is nothing to snort Jungwon, how long have you been drinking blood? You have dark circles in plain sight and this is a symptom of lack of blood in your body not to mention your lips are so cracked and almost purple. Please Jungwon you seriously need to drink blood and recover a little, it’s been more than a week that you’ve been locked in here and it’s not like you are among the sunniest people i know" Jay’s words warmed his heart even though that emotional woman had not felt it for a long time could sense the concern of Jay and the other members. " I seriously tried to drink a bag but i had a rejection for that blood since i felt for some moments the smell of the Y/n's blood i could not remove it from my head and i did not even taste it, Don’t know what’s happening to me i’m the leader of vampires and i’m getting weak for a stupid human..." Sunoo sat down next to Jungwon and hugged him, they had a platonic relationship of friendship and they had always helped each other in any dark moment and it hurt him to see a person with whom he had spent whole years being the light and the positive part of the group. " Maybe we could convince her to come and visit you with the excuse that you have to finish that journalism project and be able to reveal them seriously because you were so behaving with her" A sweet smile came out of Sunoo’s lips and a strong sense of confusion crept into Jungwon’s body "Oh my god how many times i have to tell you is not the soul mate, it’s just a human with a type of blood extremely different from others that has a strong power on my psyche, i bet my life that if it was away from me i would not have this kind of problem" a laugh came out of the smallest "God how do you make it so naive Jungwon, you are the leader of the vampires but you should be fucking happy to have found your soul mate instead you always act like an asshole with her, Wake up for a moment because if some other vampire comes to discover it they will want to steal you 100%. Yesterday i even told you that she had asked me about you and was seriously worried about you, and what she should be concerned about is her being a human without any kind of power and who could be hurt instantly" Niki was always quiet enough because he was the smallest of the group and had never responded badly to other members not to mention Jungwon who respected him very much. " Well at this point i should go to write to Y/n to come to our house otherwise a mini fight between vampires could break out!". Jake smiled at everyone and came out to call Y/n but he did not know that the human being who so detested his leader had done a lot of research and had discovered thanks to T/l that 90% was his supposed soul mate but there was that 10% that could have been chosen by the world of vampires to sacrifice his body and soul to the vampire leader who had little chance of survival.
Y/n was extremely terrified by Jake’s call to go home and study but knew that sooner or later he would have to face Jungwon both because the deadline for the project was expiring also because she wanted to know if she was her soul mate would have wanted to kill her, He did not trust any of the 7 vampires but Jake and Hoon seemed to have taken in sympathy even Niki the smallest of the group so he made strength and ran and played at the house of the 7 members.
Jake sat you down in the large room they shared in the dorm and a little black cat came up to them to sniff it and pursed "Well you’re one of the few people that Sinky at first gets along with, Niki is seriously right at this point!" You were crouching to poach the cat and 12 pairs of eyes looked at you through the large sitting room "Whose cat is this?" It was seriously beautiful and you thought it was Jay because he was always represented by a black cat "It was supposed to be a gift for me, but Sinky decided on his own who was his master or favorite member and that was the leader" Jay looked at you smiling and luckily that fear you had before entering was slowly diminishing until you saw Jungwon coming down the stairs and watching you carefully as you were caressing his precious cat. Jungwon had felt your presence already a few blocks from their home and seriously had to understand if you were really for him his soul mate or just a fixation on your blood, He had serious anxiety about seeing you and asking you to do something extremely intimate with him but only in that world could he understand if you were really his soul mate or maybe he already knew....
"Y/n, follow me that we must go ahead with the project" You looked at all the other members and nodded smiling "Isn’t it better to study in the living room or the kitchen?" Heeseung looked at Jungwon and made a sign to come down and make you feel comfortable, and Jungwon brought his notes down. "How are you?" You looked at Jungwon slightly with obvious dark circles, lips as dry and the knuckles of the hands slightly violet, he said to you "Could be better" and you were seriously worried about him, At first you couldn’t stand him but after discovering all the vampire nonsense, the tragic story between his mom and dad and his transformation lasted much longer than the others because the most powerful of vampires had decided that he should be the leader, Small feelings made their way into you. " Is there any way or anything i could do to make you feel better?" Jungwon’s gaze looked at you intensely and you felt yourself being observed by the other members, He shook his head and went on with the project but you knew there was only one way if he wanted to find out if you were seriously his soul mate so you went to sit next to Jungwon and you took his hand. It made you shiver because he seemed frozen in touch with you "What are you doing Y/n?" You began to draw little circles in his big, venous hands and saw a slight gleam in his eyes "I know, i’ll sound like a nosy lunatic but i’ve done some research on you and your behavior with me is that of a vampire in a state of uncertainty and no tolerance to any kind of person or being alive, the cause of this state at 95% is that of falling in love with a being not of the same living being and for your bad luck you are the leader of vampires so you have a lot of advantages but at the same time disadvantages because the first vampire of the pack who falls in love will suffer most of all and you are suffering right now Jungwon. A little whistle came out of Hoon’s lips "Fuck finally a person who tells you the truth in the face, i’m so happy that your soul mate is Y/n and not some slutty vampire trying to get into your pants only because you’re the most powerful vampire" A slight redness formed in your face and you looked softly at Jungwon. "There is only one way to know if you are exactly my soul mate Y/n, but i bet you will run away from me when you see my true nature!" You looked up and looked at Jungwon. "When have i ever backed away in my college years? No time and you know it too, so let’s end this forever Jungwon. Do what you have to do to see if i’m your soul mate but we all know that i am, who is it that spends the hours of the night watching me sleep from my dorm window or who is it that makes you go crazy? Me, Jungwon no other vampire or human". "Well if you are so curious to see my real nature follow me but do not try to run away because i could find you anywhere in the world" You nodded with a smirk and he took you to his room, your heart was beating crazy did you love challenges but maybe this was too much for you?
You sat in his bed and watched him close the Jungwon door to his room, I smiled a little bit and expected the worst but he took your hand and showed you around his room showing a picture of his mom "I would never hurt you Y/n, my mom made me discover the world of human beings before my transformation and I feel how your heart is beating quickly or how fear is making you anxious but I would never have thought to have to deal with another human. After his death, I did not want to have anything to do with the world of humans but then you came and I don’t know what’s happening to me..." Did not make him finish the sentence that you kissed him, you were seriously wanting to kiss him and feel the taste of his lips or hear his groans coming out of his lips and after a few seconds the kiss became more and more violent and desperate that you felt his canines become longer than necessary and his tongue licked you the lower lip and then slowly cognize for a second its canine to make you slightly out of blood, You felt his lips sucking your lower lip and a small moan came out of his lips, you strapped your arms to the bottom of his head slightly pulled his hair, did not hurt that little cut in your lip but excited you even more. "Fuck Y/n, why is it so good?" you felt yourself leaning on a huge pile of pillows under you and saw the eyes of Jungwon chocolate-colored become darker with a slight shade of red, the canines slightly more pointed than usual, His hair was unkempt, making him look even younger than he should be and you felt his cold body holding up without any force in yours. You began to kiss him again and slowly you started to caress under the light knitting of his muscles pronounced after the immense training and a slight moan came out of your lips, You looked at him, and with a nod he permitted you to take off the sweater, and surprised you the biceps more and more accentuated of the feline vampire and you began to kiss his neck until big hands took away the sweatshirt that you wore and remained only in the bra. Jungwon seriously wanted you to feel good so that you were no longer the one who kissed his neck but it was him and he felt how fast your blood pumped your heart and he was extremely proud that he was the one who made you feel this way and no other individual, had begun to give you little kisses until his true nature settled in him and little sweet bites made their way from your neck up to the protrusion of your firm breast, he seriously wanted to see you for what you were, Beautiful in her mind but she didn’t want to rush things with you. little sweet licks made their way where he had bitten you with his teeth and for him you were seriously a spectacle, you had a breathless breath, your wavy hair was spread in his cushions, Your smell invaded his whole room and your lips were slightly fat because of the small cut he had made with his canines.
"Ma belle, you can’t spare me from this moment, we’ll be forever you and me" was seriously true that fate had brought you together but there was something dark out there that was looking at you and contemplating against you.
*Taglist: @arclviie strxwbloody bamguetismee steddie-steddie jungwoosbaey
#enhypen x reader#enhypen fluff#enha x reader#enhypen fanfic#enhypen drabbles#enha fanfic#enha imagines#enhypen vampire au#jungwon x reader#jake sim x reader#jay x reader#sunghoon x reader#niki x reader#sunoo x reader#lee heesung x reader#enhypen jay#enhypen sunoo#enhypen heeseung#enhypen jungwon#enhypen jake#enhypen niki#enhypen sunghoon#enhypen smut#yang jungwon#jungwon fluff#enhypen#jungwon enha#jungwon enhypen#enhypen edit#jungwon icons
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alright so based on That One Ask Yugo Posted here's my headcanon-theory-vision-thing of what the drain is/means: so, drain has a very Negative connotation within the context of the story. In General, for something to go down the drain is for something to be wasted, and for something to be wasted is to serve no use to the Bigger Picture — ergo, it is not Unreasonable to assume that the drain as a theological concept in great god grove's universe is shorthand for "the place where things that the world No Longer Needs go." this could be people, technology, concepts, entire species, etc.
given the amount of historical anachronism we see within the grove itself, it's very possible that there really is no rhyme or reason to what goes down the drain and what does not, but there are still people both in and outside of the grove who ascribe some kind of moral value to it, i.e. "well if you're here then you must have done something to deserve it because the alternative is Much scarier to think about." if the bizzyboys being from the drain is meant to prove that there are other sapient beings in there, then i imagine this could apply to the drain's residents as well. i'd say it's even possible that the grove exists in direct opposition to the drain, even if unwittingly, given how much of GGG's story is about the importance of preserving history and art, no matter how grisly or seemingly incomprehensible. either way the grove doesn't seem like the kind of place that's very keen on determining value based on usefulness, nor do its gods seem like the kind of pantheon that would come up with something like the drain. it's possible that the drain is older than even them -- i suppose i'd have to find whatever in-game info there apparently is about it to confirm lol.
anyways it'd certainly explain a few things -- again, the fact that every area seems to be in a different time period, the second-eldest god being a passionate historian, inspekta and capochin's whole [gestures vaguely] everything, even inspekta ascending to godhood in the first place. of course the bizzyboys were a legitimate organization once upon a time. but all i'm saying is that if i was a deity ruling over a land in which archival As A Concept was this vitally important thing no matter how "useless" the things being archived were considered, and one day i met a guy who literally pulled himself out of The Place Where Things Deemed Useless Go and organized a lil army of guys who are Also from the place where things deemed useless go so they could run around my land and help people, thereby telling that place to go fuck itself and that they are in fact, Not useless -- i'd be impressed. i would in fact be like "hey have you considered running in the God Elections bc that's metal as fuck." it may not have been what he needed in the end but like i see how we could have Gotten here is what i'm saying.
#great god grove#ggg spoilers#spoilers#psa#to everyone who sent in drabble requests: i AM working on them#but the first one i started working on was a pre-canon inspekta and capochin drabble#and i couldn't decide whether or not i wanted them to be born and raised In the grove or from elsewhere on earth#and then that ask got posted so. OOPS.
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I'm not saying that the bourgeoisie is limited by the mode of production. I'm saying the politicians, the bureaucrats are limited by the mode of production. Marx said in the Civil War in France, "the working class cannot simply lay hold of the ready-made state machinery, and wield it for its own purposes". Socialists cannot use the capitalist state for its own purposes, and it can only pave the way to communism through the destruction of existing social forms, such as the army, police, bureaucracy, and judiciary.
The basic logic of capitalism has not changed. It has merely shifted onto a more higher level. Competition between different countries has developed from competition between different capitals, and that is the base in which political and military competition has emerged, what Marxists understand as imperialism. Political and military competition is how economic competition between different capitals appears as in the age of imperialism. This is what the Bolsheviks have understood about imperialism. I don't care what non-Marxists have to say on the subject, as they do not grasp the logic of capitalism.
You say that the development of capitalism in Europe was due to an internal class struggle while the development of capitalism outside was by external struggle, but this is an anti-Marxist position. From the second chapter of Capital: "The exchange of commodities, therefore, first begins on the boundaries of such communities, at their points of contact with other similar communities, or with members of the latter. So soon, however, as products once become commodities in the external relations of a community, they also, by reaction, become so in its internal intercourse." Capitalism in Europe induces capitalism within the rest of the world. By trading with other countries, it has set the seeds for the emergence of capitalism within other countries. There's no separation of the internal and external logic of countries. The internal class struggles in countries manifests in how it approaches other countries, and in turn, the external political pressures from other countries shapes how the internal struggles play out in the country. I do not say these countries are socialist. I said that the politicians who are elected may be socialists (not to say they have grasped Marxism). Even if the US magically decides that it will not interfere in the affairs of other countries, its pure economic presence on the world market would force these countries to pressure. Take the USSR for example. Its collapse occurred because of the internal class conflict within it, and the victory of "management" and nomenklatura (of course, the fact such tendencies existed proved the non-socialist nature of it). The Americans have been ahead of the Soviets militarily, and the Reagan administrations massive military build up resulted in even more allocation of resources to the military. The existing state of affairs was not stable, but the build up of the American military resulted in an increase in the budget of the Soviet military. When the inevitable political crisis occurred (reflecting the working class's discontent with the status quo), Gorbachev's choice to cut military spending plunged the Soviet economy into crisis. America did not have to apply any force at all to force the collapse of the Soviet Union, it just had to force and accelerate the internal struggles within the Soviet Union. The Gotha Program was a transitional program. In the Critique of the Gotha Program, M+E critiques how sloppy the program was. In both the Gotha Program and the CotGP, both put forward a transitional program. I have not denied the necessity of transition, only that the transition must be on a communist basis, not on a sloppily made basis not rooted in communist theory. M+E have updated their theories w.r.t new information, but this lead them to the conclusion of the smashing of the state machinery. In light of the experiences of the Bolsheviks, we can reaffirm the necessity of the international revolution and the repudiation of socialism in one country, simply from the fact that the USSR no longer exists.
The sheer hubris of western social democrats with no critique of imperialism when they talk as though the US working class is responsible for all the material wealth of this nation. Like, yeah, our own exploitation does enrich the bourgeoisie, but we very much have not produced all of their wealth. We’re not that industrious.
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Morality
❥ Yandere! Arcane Viktor x Gender Neutral! Reader
A/N: cross-posted from my ao3. Old fanfiction from 2021, written way before season two. Thought I might as well post it here—the final episode broke me, by the way.
Summary: Years worth of obsession and fantasy obfuscated his once comprehensible brain. But it felt as if this was a crucial transition. Viktor is convinced he is a good man, but his actions are speaking otherwise against his morality.
Warnings: 7204 words, MDNI, obsessive behaviour, kidnapping, viktor is delusional, yandere viktor by the way, dubious consent(he coerces you), unhealthy and one-sided relationship, gender-neutral pronouns used for reader, no usage of y/n, gentle sex, set in season 1
In all honesty, Viktor did not know how it started or when it got out of hand. It started as a simple fascination and he had treated it as such. Nothing was wrong with that, he was a man of science after all. It was in his nature to feel drawn to things that he did not quite understand. Many years have passed since that day. Before his strange obsession came into his life. Honestly, now that he was alone to think about it, had it ever come into his life at all? Or, by some force of nature, he had forced it into his own life? The ever-changing flow of time halted the very moment Viktor had initially realised that he had more than a problem on his hands.
Viktor thought of himself as a man with morals. He was not the best person, yes, there are plenty of others that shone brighter than he did, but he found his value in his work and ethics. That being said, nothing about him was right. His work had been clogged for year's now; the chaotic office space merely setting as a permanent indication that he had slipped too far this time. Above all else, he had guaranteed himself that his work came foremost, give or take a few instances in which it did not. This case was different, however. A disturbing accomplishment that, when asked initially, he wrote off his findings as evidence, or even lack thereof. Whether or not he was believed, was foreign to even him.
Directly adjacent to his cluttered working place—being neat had long passed his troubled brain, hadn't it?— lie his crutch, sat in such a way that it may fall at any minute. Viktor paid it no mind, at least not at first, but looking over his notes and the observations that he had written down, an idea popped up within what was left of a comprehensive state of mind. Of course, how could he have been so oblivious to forget such a thing, it was written clear as day in these scattered notes. His nimble, cold fingers grasped at the end of his crutch and he tugged it over and dug it into the floor while it enabled him to stand.
Viktor's book laid sloppily in his hand, page open in clear view. "Yes," he breathed, "I suppose this will do." He closed the withered book and shoved it between his left arm and clothed side. Periodically, an opportunity was difficult to come by. He had to do the best with what he had been given, though an itch in his brain told him that: why settle for fine, when you can go beyond?
The aforementioned person that he mentioned, the obsession - the two had never even met before, Hell, Viktor was certain it never even knew of his existence. It was ostensibly a normal upper city citizen with no strange qualities, nothing special about its behaviours nor its personality. It was normal. But it made him feel bizarre inside. He could effortlessly correlate it to that of an over-easy egg slowly cooking within a skillet until the yoke bursts for seemingly no reason and tarnishes the taste of the egg entirely. Just like that, it was ruining him. Granted, neither of them seemed to be eggs, but he believed the metaphor to fit rather well. Humanity always seemed to be so fickle, so easily swayed and broken. Just like an egg.
No matter the weakened disposition he had, nor the lingering scent of death he had become accustomed to, nothing prepared Viktor for the way his certain obsession made him feel. He was intelligent enough to not let these be known, oh, how he would hate the way that Jayce would assume the worst of his sentiments. Would he? Jayce had changed rather strikingly since the first day the two had met. Nevertheless, Viktor never seemed to be the man for love, much less protection of those around him.
Moreover, he was sure that with such dehumanising language and behaviour, nobody would hear his side of the matter. After all, calling the object of your affection an "it," and "thing," definitely does not look good for your compassion. Still, it gave him a reason to humanise his behaviour—if his obsession is not seen as equal, then what's the issue, exactly? To be blunt, it served no purpose other than to make him feel better since not a soul knew of this but him.
Sure, it did not occur to him that he would have strayed this far, but sometimes you have to do what you can to keep someone safe. He was in no state to protect someone on his own, he knew this far too well, he could never protect anyone with this sickly, frail body of his. That is why kidnapping was an absolute must. Reminiscing of the past did no good but to open up older wounds that set themselves up for failure, but the first day they had formally met was an exhilarating experience.
When they had seen him, there was a quizzical expression plastered on their face, and they even confused him for a council member of all things—never attentive, he presumed—but upon realising who he was, Viktor found himself met with immediate scepticism. Viktor could not fault them, it was something he knew all too well, though, maybe he should have saved his anguish for another day. The way their warmer hand held onto his own when he reached out to shake it. Their hand was soft, softer than his at least, and much less calloused. Smaller. Yet, their fingers did not hold the appearance of his own; on the contrary, they looked healthy. Healthier than him.
Of course, with someone who seemed to not have any imperfection, how was Viktor not supposed to fall for them, much less become intrigued with their very existence at that point? Humans were so fickle, he knew very well with how his body had grown to become sicker, but they seemed so robust, so self-sufficient. It was just like any other person, nothing too special but it stood out to him and that was what mattered.
It hurt him, really it did, to see them gawk at him with betrayal, to seem so frightened of someone who wasn't even strong, to begin with, but love came with sacrifice and even if he couldn't help everyone, then he would try to help them the best that he could.
Viktor revolted and fought against his rationality, he really did, he tried his absolute best to make sense of both his actions and what he had done. Within the months, he had thoroughly convinced himself that it was for the greater good, for the safety of his obsession; to keep them isolated from others. It was not the healthiest choice, he would acknowledge at the time, but now he may argue that it was the only thing he could have done upon meeting them formally. He just could not let them go.
Months had passed since that day, but it was fun to reminisce sometimes. Besides, it was even better that, when he had the time, they were someone in which he could spoil with every day. Yes, Viktor took things slow and always was sure to leave them be, yet give them company, but watching them stare at him with a look that he could hardly even decipher anymore, left him breathless. And he didn't even know why.
That very thing forced him into the very dilemma that he is in now. Standing in front of a locked door with a flawlessly crafted key lying in his tremoring hand. It was from excitement, he knew it was. It was like this was his own secret sanctuary where he hid his most precious desire and treasure, his perfect obsession that wept behind locked doors. It was the same every day, no matter how long he would stare.
The door opened with a slight rasp, the only other noise being a stifled sob and the sound of scuffing against the floor, then the buoyancy of bedsprings. His stiff body staggered against the sturdy cane, his hunched over body barely allowing the light to pool in around the walls of the door frame. Every day seemed no closer to his objective. He didn't even know how he had done this. Years worth of obsession and fantasy obfuscated his once comprehensible brain. But it felt as if this was a crucial transition.
Viktor is convinced he is a good man, but his actions are speaking otherwise against his morality.
"Good morning, dear. Have you slept well?" The sounds of chains screamed in his ears when he spoke. All these years and his lover still has not gotten used to their living state. "Ehh... I have already assured you. Good behaviour is rewarded, please understand that this is an absolute must to keep you safe." They were terrified. Of him. Isolation was a punishment and he could never help but feel dreadful about them being punished for things out of their control.
"When can I go home?" was the concern they always pleaded with whenever they saw him. Viktor tried to not let it get under his skin, really he did, but the knowledge that they did not want to be with him weighed heavy on his mind. He loved them, they had to recognize. Their eyes were so passive; it reminded him of when he had first seen the mutation, Rio, when he was a young boy. Curiosity, distress; panic. They just did not understand this yet.
Perhaps all the days that he merely sat there and stared at them with a desolate expression thoroughly destroyed the way they would perceive him, or how he would blatantly ignore their tantrums and screaming, tapping his fingers along the edge of his crutch like a patient father waiting for their child to calm down. Of course, Viktor never mistreated them. The most he did was further isolate them, which explained the absolutely pitiful state that they were in right now.
Reluctance to accept the changing future will result in the fear of what's to come. He understands it's different from what they were used to. But one must adapt to their surroundings and become accustomed. Viktor has already sacrificed so much for them; when was it their turn to return the favour? The ever-changing future is something he will never know for certain.
Viktor sighed, watching them press their body against the nook of the room where their bed had been so delicately placed. The bedsheets had been sent into a state of disrepair, and certain pillows seemed more shapely than the rest. From clutching them too tightly, he inferred. It was adorable.
"This is your home," It was no wonder that they attempted to squeeze themselves farther against the wall when he staggered closer. "I don't have any food this time, I'm afraid," he stood right at the side of their mattress, directly in front of trembling form, his eyes fixated on the plate that sat adjacent to the bed, at least a few days old now. "Though, I'm glad that you, ehm, were able to finish your last meal. Good job." A sigh escaped him after the carefully placed praise fell from his lips and, upon staring hastily at them, he recalled the fear blending within their wide eyes. "However," he found himself fumbling over his words, "I know that you've been a little, eh... downcast, as of late so I have decided that I am going to offer you something that I'm sure you would love," he paused, almost reluctant to reach forward and stroke the hair behind their ear. Hesitant to touch them lovingly.
This situation was a troublesome one, of course, it would be, but he was not a fool in the matter. He read up on numerous articles simply so he can keep things safe for them — falling for one's captor, he had thought about it, yet the turmoil often sets in when he realises that they hadn't developed such a thing just yet. Had he not been too kind? Perhaps, it was the chains around their body? Particular disorders of the mind were so hard to force into existence; was that such a terrible thing to wish for? They looked as if they served more as a pet than anything else, honestly. But that's love, this is just his love. Viktor was well aware that a plethora of things regarding both he and his health weren't precisely right, particularly in concerns to other people. Honestly, staring at them in such a miserable state made him feel almost remorseful.
They must feel so trapped, not to mention secluded, after all, he was never able to spend as much time with them as he would have preferred. He wondered, did they feel imprisoned in their own body, too? Probably not in the way that he did, but it was a suspicion that lingered in his mind. He set his hand on the side of their face unexpectedly, and they jolted back. Granted, he was certain that his hand was freezing. But, Hell, it appeared as if they had almost whimpered at his touch. Still, he had never done anything to harm them, he's only keeping them safe. The images of the mutation Rio sitting in a tank of fluids that he knew all too well now, the thought of it being kept alive despite its pleas not to. Such lengths are just an experiment to preserve life. He understood, now. Not in the way that he should have, but he did.
Maybe that was how they felt. Like a trapped animal, frightened and alone. But they have him, they may not want him, but he is there.
Viktor's knees buckled as they pressed against the edge of the mattress, gently hoisting one after the other to get closer to the horrified individual hiding from his affection, which was already something which he never exhibited frequently.
"I want you to understand," he ran his thumb along their cheek with feathery soft touches, "I know you still don't understand why I'm doing this, or why you're here but rest assured that it's all out of genuine love." When you're going to change the world, don't ask for permission. "Alone. You're lonely and you're scared. I know how you feel. But you're special," their eyes met Viktor's for but an instant and it sent shock waves down his spine. Don't ask permission. "You're special to me, and that is what truly matters at this moment." They were about to cry. Correction, they were sobbing. And it was all his fault. Emotional turmoil mixed with the trauma enforced within them made this happen - because of Viktor.
And despite it all, Viktor could not help but feel proud of his accomplishments.
"Please," their name rolled off of his tongue like a loose screw in his brain, though more akin to a prayer. "Look at me when I'm talking to you, please." Their disobedience irritated him and sent his nostrils flaring, but he didn't allow that to show outwardly. They were already so skittish, why would he threaten them further? "Mm, I will reiterate it as many times as you desire: good behaviour is rewarded. If... If you're good—for me—then, and only then, will I allow you to go outside." His words set off a fire in their brain, he could tell how their breathing unexpectedly halted and they went completely tight-lipped. Was that all it took for them to settle down? An effortlessly broken promise?
Right, they were at their wit's end, weren't they? Their emotions override their rationality. The sunlight would be good for their health, after all. Quite frankly, the thought was unsettling, Viktor didn't want them out of his sight, but if it would make them satisfied then he could make configurations for such a thing. Though, he would have to be cautious to not allow anyone to see them. What if they tried to... escape, in a sense? It was dangerous, he would have to think about it thoroughly.
"Do you mean it?" They said, suddenly. Their head was raised aloft and their wide eyes stared directly at him. "If I'm good... I'll be able to go outside? It's—" A sharp inhale. "It's been months," they were optimistic. Why was it so unbearable to see them so miserable?
For all but a juncture, Viktor felt himself at a loss for words. There was no telling whether or not he would be able to keep that promise, but he could try. They just need to learn to embrace change and adapt, maybe they will forget about it in due time. "I mean it," he said without thought, "you have my word." Did they, truly? You should not make promises that you are incapable of keeping, but just this once, the way their expression lit up and how the tears fell from their eyes, made Viktor feel as if he had done something right this entire time. Without a single word, his hand slowly lowered from their warm cheek, his gangly fingers running alongside the edges of the collar that adorned their flawless neck.
In pursuit of great, we failed to do good.
How would Viktor feel if someone had done this to him? It was a rhetorical question; nobody cared for him enough to go to such drastic lengths to proclaim their love. Therefore, this couldn't have been an unfair thing for him to do. "We must adapt to change," he spoke softly as his fingers danced around their trembling jaw. "You must adapt to change." His voice dropped an octave, gaze falling back onto their face. He had adapted to this change flawlessly fine, it was them that had to figure out how to. They were ultimate perfection in his eyes—there was just one, little issue...
"What are you doing?" Their voice quivered. Viktor's hand slipped down to their collarbones, pinching against the soft fleshy prison.
"Ahm, eh, I am... feeling you, merely. Nothing more," their breath hitched at his actions. "Unless you want me to do more?" An unexpected whimper came from them, in which he did not know if it was good or not, but knowing them, it emanated from apprehension. "I love you, you know that. I would never force you to do something. Think of it as a friendly suggestion," Viktor's blunt fingernails found themselves becoming caught on the neckline of their shirt. "So, will you let me?" There was a pause between them. Most importantly, the air seemed to grow still. Tension so thick that you could slice it in half with a knife.
They shifted but didn't give Viktor a clear yes or no. In all honesty, they seemed to be dismissing him altogether. He could feel their body heat begin to amplify, a telltale indication of both their embarrassment and if he dares say desire. A relatively foolish notion, he was well aware, however, that did not mean anything in his mind, not in the current time. The future could come later, and his life may pass him by. But the future does not exist, does it? Not until you make it so. If he didn't take satisfaction in the opportunity that he had right now, then it may never come up again.
Nevertheless, he took the chance and leaned forward, inch by inch until his face had pressed into what was seen within the crook of their neck. Their skin was soft, warm; pulsating. "I am obsessed with you," both of his hands set themselves upon their shoulders, thumbs clutching against the blade of their clavicles. "I am, truly. My devotion, my love, my obsession for you—that will be the only thing that will never change no matter the year to come. You may push me away all that you desire, but I will come back to you. I love you." His chapped lips pressed in between their jawline and neck, a chaste kiss that he allowed to linger on their skin. They didn't even bother pushing him away. They had the strength to, yet abstained.
We failed to do good.
"Understand my efforts," his voice was barely above a whisper, "you must have seen them. Make sense of my love for you." His grip on their shoulders tightened, but he knew it would never be enough to harm them. It wasn't as if he wanted to injure them in the first place, either. However, it was short-lived, and Viktor's hands fell from their shoulders to their bound wrists, and straight down to their tremoring hands. "I have always wanted to do more with you—to be what most would consider a "couple" yet you keep pushing me away." During his rambling, Viktor heard them mumble something under their breath. "Could you repeat that?"
"I said I'm sorry," they whispered. For the first time, it seemed that they were apologising to him so sincerely, maybe with actual suspicions that something may transpire if they were to not apologise. It was startling, but a chance to hear their voice was satisfactory for Viktor. There was a lingering breath that he could feel tickle the back of his neck, coupled together with their heaving chest. They were scared.
We have to make it right.
Viktor felt his heart hammer against his rib cage, a knot forming in his throat bitterly. This clammy feeling in his chest was unneeded. "Well," he spoke with a sharp exhale, "do you know what would make me forgive you?" As if he hadn't already forgiven them, to begin with. Upon feeling them nod slowly, Viktor pulled away from them and hurried his hands from their own, to their neck. His touches were faint, but loving. Held a certain edge to them, hinted at with a distinct emotion. "I'm very sure you're aware of what I'm getting at," his breathing picked up, just as theirs did, and for a few instants, it seemed that theirs was in sync with his own. To his surprise, they shifted and nodded in agreement, but did not vocalise it.
Anxiously, Viktor proceeded to slowly creep his body forward, even closer to them than he was before. He felt his heart thumping against his rib cage, the wind being knocked from his lungs as he shakily exhaled. Viktor was not the type of man for sex, he never had the time to do it; but when it came to his little obsession, why not indulge? Their consent was dubious at best, but at this point, any hint of acceptance was promising enough for him. He struggled to rationalise his thinking but instead was only met with a cluttered mess within his brain. Viktor couldn't concentrate on anything other than them at this moment. It was just the two of them, and that was all that truly carried weight to him.
His kisses against their skin were light, virtually non-existent, but the genuine love that he harboured for them persisted despite their shuddering breathing; despite their apprehension. Viktor's lips pressed against their tender jawline until he finally met the edges of their lips. His hands were twitching, cupping the sides of their face with his thumbs caressing the skin underneath their eyes. This would be their first kiss together. Would they reciprocate it? He sure hopes that they would in some way, they don't seem to have any reasoning as to why they wouldn't. He pulled back momentarily to stare at them, only to notice that they weren't looking at him at all. That would be okay.
"You're mine," he breathed as he pressed his lips against their own once again. Viktor felt as if his chapped, thin lips were being engulfed by theirs—though, theirs were equally as chapped as he were. He made a mental note to up their water intake. The kiss did not quite feel the way that he visualized it to feel—he thought it would have felt more romantic in a sense. Moreover, he would have believed that they wouldn't be chained to the wall in such an intimate instant. But, good behaviour is rewarded. This was temporary, they knew that, as did he. Just as the kiss was about to end, he felt them lean into it and press their lips into his own. That, above everything else, made him feel like the blessedest man in all of Piltover. Of Zaun, anywhere.
"I love you more than anything," confessed Viktor as he pulled away from their lips. "I'm glad that you're mine." And he meant it.
Their breath hitched just as it constantly did when he touched them. Maybe it was the fact that his hands were gradually examining their body, tilting across every crevice, from where their midsection concave whenever they'd instinctively suck it in out of humiliation, to the quiver of the skin around their navel when his fingers ran along the sensitive region. Viktor's hands were underneath their shirt, his wiry fingers eagerly squeezing the skin. They squeaked at first, his hands were frigid after all but eventually unwound though not peeking at him. Viktor wished that they would look at him like a person rather than an oddity.
The hem of their trousers huddled against their hips, hiding away the most intimate part of their body that only Viktor was allowed to see. For a moment, he looked into their eyes for the right to go ahead, but upon being avoided, Viktor merely yanked them down with enthusiasm pulsing through his veins. His thumbs pressed between their navel and hipbones, in an almost comforting gesture. But it wasn't as if they cared in the long run, however, he could hear their hitching breath. Through dirty-minded thoughts, Viktor's right hand loomed above their sex while his other clasped against their hipbone for support. He was actually doing this—something that he had just as much as dreamed of for years.
"Please," their whiny voice startled his thoughts. "Just... be gentle with me," they didn't seem to be in the mood to fight him at all. That's good. Viktor was sure he had neither the strength nor the energy to deal with it.
His thumb pressed against the sensitive nub below, threatening a gasp from them. "I'll never hurt you," he rubbed their hip in synchronisation with his sensual touches against their sex. "I promise, I will do what I can to make you feel pleasured." His breathing picked up as arousal trickled down his spine like that of the emotions that he loathed. "I want... to see the inside of you. All of you," he spoke aloud, a hint of longing in his tone which he had shoved back this entire time. He wanted them to comprehend his love to its full potential.
Viktor's face pressed against the crook of their neck once again, shifting his hips as he closed his eyes. They were making noises, now, their chained wrists clicking against the harsh metals as they lifted their hands to dig into his back. Secretly, he had hoped that they would call his name. He knew that they knew it. They've spoken it countless times before. Granted, it was always in a fit of rage or hysteria which followed, "I hate you," and, "You ruined my life." But they knew his name at the very least.
Moreover, they were unravelling at the seams. They liked this just as much as Viktor did. They loved him, they had to. Lust and love were on a thin line, so closely drawn together yet had such distinct differences. Could the same be said about obsession? Maybe so, but that did not mean much by this point.
"I love you," he breathed into their neck, his warm breath no doubt sending shivers down his spine or so he hoped. "You feel so soft, so pretty..." His fingers toyed with their sex, jerking in sporadic movements which caused their hips to buck against him, further spurring him on. "Do you like it when I touch you like this? Like I—" his breath hitched when their hands clenched the fabric of his vest, "Like I own you?" For once, they actually agreed with him.
"Y-yes," they let out a pitiful, rueful whine more akin to someone who was used to this sort of thing. But that was inane. They belonged to him. "It feels—It feels really good, I..." Their hips were rolling now, eagerly trying to accept his love rather than pushing it away like they always had been. They were accepting change. They were adapting. "Jus—just like that, please, Viktor—"
And at that moment, time seemed to halt.
They said his name, not out of pure spite or anger, not from him doing something they did not like, but in pleasure. The pleasure that he was inflicting on them. "You're doing such a good job, So good for me," it came out as more of a wheeze than praise, though there was a hint of worship hidden within it. "Are you going to come soon? I want you to come undone because of me. I love you," his lips returned their place at their neck, his crooked teeth nibbling onto their soft skin, further forcing out a reaction from them. Just from their responses and noises alone, Viktor felt as if he was going to come any second now instead, and he hadn't even touched himself. All he could feel was his dick beginning to strain against his dress pants.
It was getting so hot and stuffy, surely he should take off his vest and dress shirt soon. The things that they did to him were things that he didn't even expect. The love he harboured, the desire he held—they were his weak spot. This precious creature. Viktor felt his breathing pick up as he pulled his teeth away from their neck, their delicate skin caught between his incisors.
Once more, slowly, his fingers gently danced around their sex, forcing himself to concentrate and try to block out the absolutely lovely noises that they were emitting. The noises, be as they may, were provided to him involuntarily, he attempting to reject the wail of pleasure that came from them. The squelchy sound of their fluid pooling around his fingers met his ears, giving a sick taste of satisfaction. His left hand clenched their skin a little too tightly for even his standards, the wiry fingers of his right hand working against him, deliberately circulating apart and snapping concurrently, a shudder running down his spine at the howl they made along with the response their body offered. Devoiding much of a thought, Viktor pulled his left hand away from their hipbone, dragging the appendage straight to the front of his dress pants, fumbling with both the zipper and hem in an attempt to pull it away from his groin.
"Oh," he heaved as he pulled away, ignoring the whimper that came from his lover in front of him. They wanted this. They needed this. Needed him. "Would you mind if I tried..." The words died in his mouth as soon as they came out, his left hand hovering above his concealed groin. Surely, they would say yes? They seemed a bit dazed, though perhaps it was his fault for not allowing them the relief that they were so close to acquiring. "I want to... feel you. I may not last very long," he fished his dick out of his boxers, feeling his face heat up to the point where he was sure it was red. "Do you want to?"
They made eye contact with him this time. The humanity, the want, the greed and the fear shone in their eyes brightly, but nothing could cover the telltale signs of love and lust. Viktor already knew the answer, they didn't even have to answer him, he already knew what it was going to be by their reaction alone. This was the key to their heart.
Now, at first, Viktor would not lie when he said that it made him feel a bit shy, or nervous—the thought of them seeing such an intimate part of his body, one of which he knows can be heavily judged based on size, was nervewracking to him. But the lack of disgust in their eyes—or maybe it was hidden between a thick cloud of lust—made him believe otherwise. They liked what they saw, and hopefully, nothing would change the way that they saw him. Their approval is what he strives for. However, that does not exactly matter with how far things have gotten. How many times has he repeated that phrase in his head?
The silence was deafening, but it was enough for Viktor to shuffle forward and shift his weight onto his somewhat good leg, swallowing the rising lump in his throat as he used his free hand to pull down their trousers. After this, he would be sure to give things a thorough wash. "Can you come closer?" He asked as he pulled his hand away. Please come closer.
He hadn't expected them to listen to him, nor to actually push themselves off the wall just to get closer to him, but, at the same time, he was not complaining. "Good job," he praised, his hands returning to place on their hips. Their skin felt so warm, but Viktor could still feel the reluctance radiating off of their perfect form. Now, this was just a question of whether or not he should go through with It. If he should finish claiming them.
The rattling chains served as a constant reminder for them to not fall out of line, and Viktor was sure that they did not want to do such a thing, especially not so close to salvation at this point. Steadily, Viktor felt their thighs wrap around his hips, and though the pressure and their weight being shifted onto him were agonising, he tried to force his way through it. The way that he could feel the tip of his dick press against them—that was like pure ecstasy. He never thought the day would come when they would grind into his lap so sensually, and act as if they had never tormented him for years to come.
"God," there was a slight plea laced within his velvet tone, "I need to be inside of you. Please," as much as Viktor loved them, he could never trust them to be the one providing. Not with how their behaviour had exhibited... less than desirable traits. "Will you allow me? We could finally become one in a sense. I just want to feel your insides around me, I want to feel your body heat against me." Whether or not they found pleasure in Viktor's begging, they offered him a response anyway:
"Shut up," was what they said. "Go ahead."
And with that, Viktor found himself slowly pushing their body down into the mattress, further ruining the bedspread and sheets that weren't even properly fixed in the first place. They still seemed reluctant, as their tone even harboured a certain edge to it, but hell, Viktor could not fault them. He feels nervous, too, of course, he does. Pulling down their trousers fully to their calves, he felt a knot grow within his throat. The thought of someone else doing this to them caused bile and jealousy to rise within his empty stomach, curling and screaming in the back of his mind, yet he pushed it aside in favour of much kinder thoughts.
A part of him wished to be able to twist and manipulate this circumstance, but he knew he didn't want to do such a thing - Viktor wanted nothing more than for them to just become wholly his and only his until death would take hold of them both. And even then, that would not split them apart nor dwindle his love for them. "I'm going to..." There was a brief pause, embarrassment etched across his face, "Er, make love to you," he spoke aloud, though it was more as if he was convincing himself that he was going to, rather than informing them.
There was little to no resistance when Viktor pressed himself inside, but it was such a foreign feeling that he could not help but whimper at the sensation. They were warm on the inside, and not the mention that their body would occasionally clench around his dick. His golden eyes gaped at their face, eyeing the expressions that they would make, all the way until the hilt of his dick finally pressed against their pelvic area. This was embarrassing.
Shamelessly, Viktor pulled back his hips, only to snap them forward with a moan. He tried his best to keep quiet, however, with the way that they started breathing heavily with their knees pressed up against the sides of his thighs, he couldn't help but feel overwhelmed. They were perfect, they felt perfect - on the inside, the outside, no matter. He hunched his body over their own, using the strength in his arms—what was left of it, anyway—to keep himself up. Viktor had no clue how long he would last, nor how his body would allow him to continue. But with how it felt, he hoped it would be long enough.
"You—you're... You're big," they suddenly confessed, a slight whimper escaping with the moan that left them. Fuck, they sounded so adorable like that. "Don't... Stop, please—"
A shiver ran down Viktor's spine at the blatant praise that fell from their lips shamelessly, it seemed so heinous, almost as if they were trying to get him going. "Ah..." Keep talking. "You, ah—you think so?" He panted as his hips snapped forward once, then twice. Was he drooling? Shit, he was drooling. "You feel so good on the in—the inside. So warm, so inviting. I would never... want to stop," a particularly loud moan escaped him, which seemed to be a hybrid of both a moan and wheeze. His lover didn't seem to notice nor care, however.
Why would they ever want to leave when they have such luxury in their life? Here they were, underneath Viktor with their eyes clenched tightly, hands balled up in fists as strings of moans escaped their bitten lips. They looked gorgeous like that. It even made Viktor feel powerful to know that he was able to make them feel such a way. Nearly impossible, he thought, if they weren't tied up and reluctant to accept him, they might have tried something devious and that would have ruined every single thing that Viktor had planned. Still, they're accepting his love.
His rhythm wasn't exactly straight nor following any set beat. Viktor felt as if his movements were sloppy and skewed, choppy thrusts and shuddering muscles that he was surprised had lasted this long. He could feel himself growing close, but he couldn't allow himself to unless they had, first. They mattered more than anything else.
"D... Darling," he nearly cried out, "I love you so much—" One of their hands threw itself behind Viktor's head, tangling their fingers within his messy locks of dark hair, gently tugging him forward. A shock ran down his spine at the gesture.
"I know," they breathed, "I know you do." Were they feeding into his delusion and leaving him to feel as if they felt the same, or did they genuinely love him at this moment? The way their eyes slowly peeked open was complete bliss for him, the irises that stared directly into his own with blown-out pupils—love.
He felt his sloppy movements speeding up, all while his body became sore from the extended movements, and all while this happened he felt the drool collect on the edge of his lips, dripping down his chin to their shirt, wetting the wrinkled fabrics. It didn't matter how ruined it would get, Viktor made a mental note to give them an even better shirt. Nevertheless, a knot coiled itself within his gut, curling around his navel and shooting a cramp up his spine in an almost pleasurable manner.
His bottom lip caught itself in between his incisors, muffling a forthcoming moan. "Are you—" a choked moan. "Are you clos—close? Please—" There was borderline whimpering in tone and he could not help but feel embarrassed for it, but the trembling person below made him feel a little better about his childish worries. They nodded without speaking, staring at him through thick eyelashes. They were gorgeous.
Viktor smiled, and it met his eyes. "So am I."
It was blissful, for him, at least—everything seemed perfect and in order as Viktor's right hand clasped around the side of their waist, squeezing the soft, malleable flesh: pliant. His breathing picked up, as did theirs, but he was determined to stretch this out for as long as he allowed himself to. As he closed his eyes tightly, Viktor felt his thumb dig into the dip between their stomach and hip bone, causing a red indentation on the soft skin. Through his pleasure, he could hear the loud sound of their moans below, as well as the sound of skin slapping against the skin; the squelch of genetic fluids mixed. Viktor's eyebrows furrowed together at the sound, his head falling against their chest, forehead pressed directly above their heart. Their clavicle, he presumed. They felt so good, he didn't want to stop, but he was so close.
"Viktor—" they cried out, suddenly, "I'm g—going—" there was a loud, rueful cry, followed by a high-pitched whimper. He could feel them clench around his dick, and then they had come. This sent him over the edge. Viktor lifted his head weakly and pressed his lips against their own, his saliva smearing all over their mouth and cheeks. He moaned into their mouth, pressing his hips forward one more time as his hand clenched their skin, surely hard enough to leave a bruise. He emptied inside of them, the muscles in his thighs twitching and convulsing, his dick soon going limp thereafter.
For a moment, Viktor caught his breath, chest heaving with laboured breaths. Tears pricked his vision when he opened his eyes, and the slobber dripped from his lips. His legs felt as if they were stuck in mud, but how did they feel? As he lifted himself, Viktor stared down at the person below him, completely covered in the afterglow. I came inside, that was an accident, he thought, but they looked so cute like that.
Much like before, Viktor felt a knot form in the middle of his throat, Adam's apple bobbing with each calculated swallow and breath.
Viktor felt breathless, but he felt as if that was to be expected. He stared down below at the barely visible person he had claimed just a few moments prior; his vision betraying him. He rests his forehead against theirs, a promise of devotion. "What can I do to make you love me?"
"Let me go," they whispered in a soft croon.
"You know I cannot afford to do that. You're mine."
#arcane#arcane x reader#viktor arcane x reader#yandere x reader#x reader#yandere viktor#yandere arcane#arcane viktor#arcane viktor x reader#yandere viktor x reader
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you’ve done firebender/waterbender/earthbender/nonbender/avatar zuko, so what do you think of air bender zuko?
an excellent question!
love the idea of him existing in stark contrast to aang- they're both airbenders, but they're clearly on two very opposite sides of a spectrum. zuko realizes for himself just how much danger he would be in if anyone found out he was an airbender, so he successfully hides his bending- even when his father calls for a farce of an agni kai after he speaks out in the war meeting and burns his face and banishes him.
he still gives him the quest to find the avatar, but things go a little differently this time. zuko searches the air temples diligently for any trace of the avatar- but it's a lot harder for him to ignore the clear signs that history may not have actually played out like he was taught when he's an airbender too. one day he wakes up in the middle of the night with the realization that he doesn't want to go home.
he steals away in the night, not even telling his uncle.
he decides to actually start practicing his airbending, which basically just translates into him making it all up as he goes. in order to make money, he ends up participating in underground fighting tournaments- first just using his dao, and then quietly incorporating his airbending alongside them. inevitably rumors spread of a 'surviving' airbender, and that attracts all kinds of attention.
zuko doesn't care. he's having the time of his life actually.
(he is in fact, not having the time of his life. this is very much a maladaptive coping mechanism. but he's very good at fooling himself into thinking otherwise.)
he never stays in one place for too long, and is constantly on the move. there's always a new place for him to fight. sometimes he does a little light theft. he's definitely fought toph once or twice, who only actually realizes that he was probably an airbender after she meets aang- who is both thrilled to hear about another airbender and is deeply confused by the way toph describes him.
he doesn't understand. his people are supposed to be peaceful.
(zuko isn't one of his people, of course, but he has no way of knowing this. toph's the only one who has ever met him and she's well. blind.)
he winds up completely sitting out the entire war. he just doesn't care. post-war aang spends a lot of time trying to track down this rumored airbender after the war- and also prince zuko of the fire nation, iroh's nephew who went missing about a year into his banishment.
clearly these two tasks are unrelated, right?
#asks#zuko is just an absolute mess of a person#he's not having a great time.#but it's so easy for him to convince himself that he likes this lifestyle. at least he's free now.#(aang will find that what he thinks zuko needs and what zuko actually needs are two *very* different things)
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Hello! I just recently found your blog and just wanted to say that I absolutely love your art! I also love the banished!Athena au a lot, could you maybe explain the au a bit? :")
It's a really simple au :3! I don't mind :P basically after god games, Athena gets her divinity taken away and banished (luckily she somehow managed to wake up in Ithaca), now she lives her life as a mortal with a different name, "Pallas" (the royal family finds and takes her in and as a disguise, they have her as their personal guard) and shenanigans ensue :3
Oh, to mention, it's looked down upon for any other god to talk to her in her banishment. It isn't as though they'd get punished for it, the best that'll happen is a scolding, but after what Zeus did to his favorite, the others are reluctant to go against him (Athena finds a loophole to talk to Ares, by having him as her patron, Aphrodite may also have a shrine beside him because pretty love goddess gets what she wants)
Hermes is of course the obvious exception, messenger god and all (they used to use him to send letters to talk to Athena for them)
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That post about an apparent social transition in college is just in absolute bad faith. To claim that Gerard lived as a woman in college but only had to stop because ‘she’ had to get a job completely distorts the facts that us mcr fans know. All Gerard said was this: ‘Really, I would do what I did when I dressed in drag this one time before. I went to school in drag, in art school and my day was completely different because everybody thought I was a chick’. Long time mcr fans like us know the facts, but new fans don’t, and girlgerard is quite literally lying to new fans because constructing Gerard as a trans woman gives them some weird pleasure. Mobilising accusations of transphobia towards anyone who doesn’t agree is also in such bad faith. It’s just completely moving the goal posts - people criticise them for being insensitive to trans people and intrusive towards gerard, they throw out the transphobe accusations. That way they can deflect from their own transphobia that manifests in transvestigating and fetishising trans women and gnc men. And most fundamentally of all - most people are not denying that gerard may be trans feminine. Girlgerard sees challenges to their transvestigating as trying to make Gerard cis in a transphobic way. But the actual fact of the matter is we respect Gerard. If Gerard came out as trans tomorrow we’d love and support them. Girlgerard on the other hand has no respect for Gerard. Rant over
AMEN!!!! literally when i read that tweet i was like...where did you come up with this information. bc yes i KNOW the interview in question, we all do. to construct your own truth that gerard lived as a woman in college for an 'undisclosed period of time' like. thats fake 😭 but of course its something that people who do not know all the lore will just eat right up as fact.
also them saying that he/they are not real pronouns that real people use and continue to use is craaaazy and yes literally transphobic.
also i like really can relate to gerard and the things hes said about not really subscribing or relating to masculinity in the same way that i feel about femininity. i keep my hair buzzed and i dont wear skirts or dresses but i still wear makeup and that like. is just who i am. the same way gerard can wear skirts and dresses and makeup and also like suits or jeans and his fucking green jackets. i will not attempt to label him because thats LITERALLY the problem here but like. idk it just overall gives off the vibe that they dont see nuance in gender...if gerard is not a man then he must be a woman?? its like were going back in time here.
and also btw yes of course. if gerard ever came out i would be so supportive and loving as always. if people close to gerard started using different pronouns we would follow suit. its just that simple. if those things never happen please just leave gerard alone and let them do whatever they want!
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SHIFTING ISN'T SPECIAL
please bare with me on this one bc it might be a bit longer than i expected (and excuse my very bad title-naming skills 😭)
in this essay i will try to put down in words exactly what i realised today as i started my first day into reprogramming my mind, something that i’m doing while following reya singh’s method. what is that?
shifting IS easy.
yes, i know everybody says it, but it’s the truth and i’m not telling you this as someone who shifts regularly to her drs, because i don’t (yet!). however, it did just click in my mind why people always say it and mean it. and i feel incredibly stupid for not understanding it waaay earlier than just now, 4 years into my journey.
now, let me walk you through the thought process behind this.
in reya’s 4-day method for reprogramming your mind, she instructs to write a list of your beliefs and non-beliefs. this may sound really silly and kinda useless at first - believe me, i woke up this morning thinking “what exactly am i supposed to do after that?” - but there’s a valid reason for it, which is to help you delete from your mind the idea that shifting is like a superpower that’s simply not for everyone and very hard to reach, when that is not the case at all!
in my own beliefs list, i’ve written “i am capable of shifting” right in between “i can speak english”, “i can write and read” and “i can eat --” (and some other things like “i can’t eat gluten”, bc i have celiac disease, “i can dream”, we all do! and “i can lucid dream”). you see where i’m going with this? i’m putting shifting in the same category as things we all normally do, that we sometimes don’t even think about doing since they’re such a natural activity. to this list i could add “i can breathe”, because we do it automatically, without even realising unless we focus on it. the same can be said for drinking or eating really, if you’re angry or thirsty you just go and get whatever pleases you the most and not dwell on it.
in the non-beliefs list, i’ve written obvious things like santa and the easter bunny (which isn’t common here in italy tbf but yeah) and sentences like “i can’t swim”, “i can’t draw”, “i can’t eat strawberries” and in between them also “i don’t fear shifting”. here, the point is that all these listed beliefs are stuff i know for a fact to be false: i can swim perfectly, i am an artist and i love strawberries + i’m not allergic to them or anything. by placing shifting there, i'm stating that just like i KNOW i can swim or whatever, i also KNOW i'm not scared of shifting.
you’re literally gaslighting your subconscious mind into believing what is real for a fact and what isn’t.
after writing down this list, which can be done on paper just like on your preferred device, i reread everything twice explaining to myself why i chose these things and why they are beliefs or not. that’s how i realised that shifting is easy. when people talk about it “clicking” they weren’t lying!
shifting isn’t special, this is what the list thing tries to prove you. it’s not special because, just like breathing and eating and reading, we do it subconsciously everyday. take your own first language: you speak it naturally without having to doubt it, and if you know a second language well enough like i know english for instance (my mother-tongue is italian) then you can even start talking to yourself and think in that language without having to search up translations.
what’s the difference with shifting then?
the difference is that shifting hasn’t been taught to us in the same way as a language has been, all throughout school. the same thing goes for reading and writing: we read and write naturally because we’ve been taught how to when we were young and it’s now engraved in our brains, just like with learning our first language, which is something we normally do thanks to our teachers, our families and the people around us, of course. this doesn’t happen with shifting in most cases, as we all know, which means it’s normal for it to take a bit to grasp as a concept and existing thing/activity. it’s natural, most of us human beings just don’t know about it, nor that we’re capable of doing it.
this is why i said it’s not special: just like breathing, everybody can do it (and so do you)!
going back to the non-beliefs list; i should also add that as a society we usually are taught what to believe in from a young age, and specifically what is believed to be a fantasy, a dream, or something real. as grown-ups, though, we have the right to believe in whatever we want, like shifting. as a realistic person, i understand that some people may have a hard time believing something as great as shifting could be true, because it genuinely doesn’t sound like it! so yes, this is also a factor that can and does make it harder for someone to trust their guts and expect to wake up somewhere that’s only fictional here.
shifting clicks for everybody at different times, but i hope this post will help some of you here understand it better and know that what more experienced shifters say always has a meaning, you just need the time to properly reflect on it to get it!
when it clicked for me a few hours ago i felt a huge rush of adrenaline and happiness bc yes, i can actually shift. i’m just overcomplicating it for no reason and so many of you are doing the same!
it’s okay though, we’ll all get there <3
(psa: if you saw any grammar mistakes or anything NO YOU DIDN'T and also please don't mind if this rant doesn't sound logical, i tried my best to explain myself like i wanted to 🥲)
#lola’s thoughts ✮#shiftblr#shifting blog#shifting realities#shifting community#shifting IS easy#shifting motivation#shifting antis dni#reality shifting#shifting methods#desired reality
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Hello, out of the four guardians, who was the most difficult for the lamb to defeat?
You’re probably thinking it would be Bat. Summoner enemies are a pain in the god damn ASS, and yes i totally agree with that- you won’t find a single person on the planet who hates fighting a summoner more than I do. they’re cowardly enemies who run away from the lamb and deal damage mainly through summoned allies and projectiles. Now imagine fighting one of those but ONE it’s not scared of you, TWO it has quadruple the normal amount of hp, THREE its been given godly steroids, and FOUR you have to defeat the smaller normal-enemy version of him after you deplete the boss HP- so if you’re not careful you’ll die to a fucking scamp after a very stressful bossfight. And he’s also the final of the four that you have to fight, so of course he’d be the hardest, right?
Or maybe you’re thinking Bear because she’s the strongest physical fighter out of the four. She even has a small scripted impossible-to-win arm wrestle minigame with the Lamb before her fight starts, proving she IS actually stronger than the Lamb when going bare arm to arm! Blood Guardian enemies are also REALLY hard (more dangerous in pairs IMO but still formidable on their own) and you STILL have to fight that afterwards. AND from a lore perspective she doesn’t change all that much in her transformation from enemy to boss so surely it’s her!
Or maybe you even consider Kitty. They’re the first of the four but I’ve also said they’re the dirtiest fighter. I’m not sure why you’d think they’re the hardest because I say they fight dirty, but hey, some people consider Leshy’s fight to be the hardest and well I can’t really blame them, different strengths different weaknesses. They flail a lot, they’ve got unfair acid projectiles that poison VERY quickly, they used to have insta-kill moves before they were removed. They’re also faster on foot than regular swordsmen so after defeating the big caterpillar first time you may get jumpscared and killed because you just had this really big random battle and weren’t expecting that little cultist to get back up and charge you. It’s GOTTA be Kitty
Well you’re wrong it’s totally Dove. Why? I’ll give you five words as to why: a lot of indeflectable projectiles. I hate it. I hate it I hate it I hate it.
#have me talking about my ocs fights like theyre canon#ramblings of a kitkat#cotl kitty#cotl dove#cotl bear#cotl bat
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The Couch in S8 and how it will tie to buddie canon, a 9-1-1 analysis
First of all, I'd like to say that this theory is based solely on observations made by myself and others, on camera and lighting choices which, as we all know, are always very important in a TV show. I'm NOT going to go back over the previous couch theory, 1. because I don't have the time and 2. because everything has already been said (Buck falling asleep on Eddie's couch because it's the only place he feels safe, Chris falling asleep in the same place, yada yada).
Next, this theory is going to be pretty much chronological, but I may be getting a little ahead of myself at times, sorry. In the end, you'll see, it makes sense, but I'm also going to ask you for a bit of imagination.
Let's dive into it!
Everything begins in 8x01. We get a scene between Buck, Tommy and Eddie, who are organizing a birthday party for Chris over a facecall. Eddie's couch makes its first appearance this season: Eddie sits on it to call Chris, and Buck and Tommy hide behind it.
Buck and Tommy share a moment. It's cute to see Buck so comfortable in his relationship and his attraction. Well, Tommy is awkward but, are you surprised? (no) As Eddie starts the call, Buck and Tommy jump from behind the couch and we get the first frame interesting enough for this analysis.
What can we say? Eddie is alone on the couch, Buck on his left and Tommy on his right.
(Eddie is once again between Buck and Tommy. In all their scenes together, there's always someone in between the other two. That's not the point here but I love to point it out.)
Buck isn't with Eddie, he's standing behind the couch. It's acting like a physical separation. Buck can only watch Eddie's pain from a distance as the call goes on, and he is useless. Powerless.
That will be the case throughout the early part of this season.
Buck doesn't do anything about Chris and Eddie.
Eddie doesn't talk to Buck about Chris at all. They don't share a single scene alone in the privacy of one of their homes. There's always someone with them - Tommy, the rest of the crew - or they're at the station. Eddie will talk about Chris to Hen, Bobby, the cheerleader's father, Father Brian, even Brad in 8x08. NEVER Buck.
There's also something interesting about the fact that Eddie and Buck don't really talk to each other until Tommy breaks up with Buck.
It's probably not conscious, but I really think Buck is actually distracted by Tommy. He's in this new relationship, it's good, it's cute, it's really different from what he's used to.
We'll see that this will eventually go away...
(A quick interlude: Of course this isn't the first time we've seen 3 people with the couch. It also happened with Buck, Eddie and Chris in S3 - yeah, when couch theory wasn't even a thing. They're on Buck's couch though, but I'm planting a seed in your mind, watch out...)
Next time, it's not Eddie's couch we're talking about, but Buck's. It appears in 8x05, when Buck is sitting in his armchair after returning from the hospital and Tommy is looking after him. There's a lot to say in this scene, but I'm going to focus on one or two things.
Do I even need to say it? Episode 5 was shot after episode 6. I can't stressed out how much it's hit after hit to show us that Buck and Tommy are not staying together (and indeed, Tommy breaks up in 8x06). I imagine the writers ran with the opportunity to show just how incompatible and how physically separated Buck and Tommy are, as well as drawing many parallels between Tommy and Eddie. Maybe I'll talk about that someday.
In this frame, Buck and Tommy are separated. Buck is sleeping in the armchair and Tommy on the couch. I know it's better to sleep in a sitting position when you've dislocated a shoulder, but they could have had Buck sleeping in his bed, snug in his pillows, Tommy next to him.
They didn't.
They made Tommy sleep on the couch. Buck's uncomfortable couch. The one I think he bought with Natalia (if I'm wrong, please don't hate me, season 6 is far in the back of my mind).
See, Tommy doesn't even fit properly on the couch. He's got his head on the armrest and he doesn't have a blanket that covers him completely. He doesn't fit into Buck's life, no matter how hard he tries. He's always out of place.
He chooses the couch Buck doesn't like, and he'll be the only one in this season so far to use it. Buck will never choose this couch, even if he thinks it's the right choice.
(By the way, Oliver said in an interview literally released before episode 8 that Buck's couch is uncomfortable.... Thanks for that, I know you're a couch theory truther Oliver.)
Next couch, 8x06. Eddie's Risky Business moment.
He dances in his living room and jumps on his couch twice. The first time to recreate the scene. The second time, he chooses to lie down on the couch to bask in the euphoria a little longer. Eddie has his first moment of pure joy in years, and it's on the couch that he decides to settle down and calm down. Not saying too much about it but I wanted to point it out.
Where it gets interesting, you know it, is when Buck arrives. Buck, who's just been dumped and once again chooses Eddie's house for a little comfort. He hands Eddie a beer and sits down first on the couch to drink his own.
Let's take a look at this last frame. The framing ticked me off as soon as I saw it, but I couldn't put my finger on why. Now, I know.
Eddie and Buck are sitting side by side, yes, but! If you pay close attention, you can see several things.
First, Buck appears completely in the frame, from shoulder to shoulder. He takes up most of the space, sitting upright on the couch, staring straight ahead.
On the other side, Eddie leans against the backrest, but in doing so, he moves out of frame. The arm and hand holding the beer are totally offscreen. He's looking to the side, not at Buck.
It's already a weird composition, a very pointed choice, because why aren't they both clearly visible in the frame? Why is Eddie a little off the side? This could have been filmed in a slightly less close-up shot, to show them both fully, but it's not. It's clearly a choice.
Let me direct your attention to the wall behind them. You'll see, it's interesting.
Between them, but rather on Eddie's side, what can we see? A picture. Yeah, but not a random one. You can see it more clearly on this frame of Eddie.
Yep. It's an art of Texas. Quite ugly if you ask me. (Eddie, you're clearly making some strange choices when it comes to decorating.)
I won't try to analyze this framework any further, as you've already understood what I'm getting at if you've been paying attention.
It's a foreshadowing of Eddie leaving for Texas.
So we got Eddie leaning away from Buck, a Texas pic on the wall between them, while Buck is just here, choosing Eddie's couch (and Eddie) for comfort after his breakup. It's where he feels safe. They don't need to talk, they have each other... or so he thinks. Sorry Buck.
Let's move on to 8x08. Where it all makes sense.
Very quickly: Eddie isn't making his call to Chris on the couch, but on his coffee table. First, what the hell? It's weird, unless you think he considers the couch a nice place to sit on, and that this conversation will be far from nice in his head. Indeed, he was right.
Buck shows up at Eddie's after baking way too much bread, because he almost called Tommy. By the way, the mere fact that he decided to go to Eddie's to stop himself from doing so speaks volumes, but let's not get into that.
(Look at his little basket, his bread all wrapped up. Why are you like that Buck.)
When he realizes that Eddie is seriously thinking of moving to El Paso... well, he supports him. He supports him, because that's what a best friend is supposed to do, right? He suggests to Eddie, and I quote, “we should move this party to the couch”.
By the way, this is the first time he's explicitly brought the couch to Eddie. And we know that when a character mentions something for the first time, it's to emphasize it.
It's the same with Eddie saying he's straight… or when he says “we?” after Buck's suggestion. They are in this together, and it's what Eddie realizes when Buck goes to sit on the couch... He doesn't have to do all that alone. (Take that little side analysis, my treat. I fucking love this scene, I want to dissect it.)
Buck sits on this couch he's chosen many times over the years.
It's THE couch, the one he always goes to when something is not right in his life. After he died, when he couldn't sleep at home. After his breakup.
He's the first to sit on it ... yes, just like in 8x06.
(This may seem trivial, of course, but the fact that he always chooses to go without waiting for Eddie... Imo, it screams “Buck will figure it all out first and Eddie will have to catch up with him later”. Or "Buck will be waiting for Eddie". Same with him already drinking his beer while Eddie struggles to open it. Maybe a bit far-fetched, but eh? Anyway.)
The setting of the scene is so cold, and I didn't realize it until I compared it with the other scenes on the couch. This creates quite a contrast.
(Sorry I need to talk about something. Let's open a analysis in the analysis.
Buck is dressed in blue - it's Eddie's color in the color theory - while Eddie is dressed in a brownish button down. When I first watched this scene last night, I didn't notice, but looking again… Don't these outfits remind you of anything?
Yeah. I know, they're not the same, but they're similar and it's enough for me to make the parallel. Buck was there for Eddie when Chris left, and he's now here for him when Eddie wants to move to Texas.
Something about "I love you, so I'm letting you go". I'm crying too, don't worry.)
Back to the couch.
Eddie is totally off-screen, he's gone compared to the last time we saw the couch. Buck is alone, something shifts on his face - I'm not gonna lie, it was like watching a fanfic from AO3 on my screen. I've read enough feelings realization to recognize something close. Okay, to be fair, I don't know if it's a total realization of his feelings, but it's a start... and how beautiful that it's happening on Eddie's couch.
The couch represents safety, love, family for Buck. We understood it in s6 when it was first brought up.
By sitting on it, Buck chooses this life with Eddie, in a way.
Can you see the frame with the Texas pic? It's now completely visible, in the frame. It's behind Buck, over his shoulder. Eddie's departure, and by extension Texas, will haunt Buck for a long time to come.
I have to say, this shot is incredible. The whole scene is. I want to play it again and again, I want it tattooed on my eyelids. I'm gonna think about it for 3 months.
In a few episodes, we've gone from Buck behind the couch - away from Eddie's problems, distracted by Tommy - to Buck on the couch, alone - totally there and available for Eddie, even though Eddie soon won't be.
After the breakup, Buck can finally talk to Eddie, care about him - not that he didn't before that, but he's finally free to throw himself back into his relationship with his best friend as before.
Buck has found his home, his couch, the relationship he's most comfortable in, but maybe it's only now, when Eddie's about to leave, that he realizes it.
The couch was never about Eddie - it was always about Buck and his relationship with him. So it's even more powerful to see him behind it in 8x01, on it with Eddie in 8x06 and finally all alone in 8x08.
(I didn't know Oliver confirmed the symbolism of the couch back in S6 but, once again, thank you Oliver.)
(Even if Tim Minear tries to say he doesn't know what it means... Please Tim, we know you're smarter than that).
So what can we expect from this couch for the rest of the season?
If Eddie is really leaving, which I don't believe, he might offer Buck his couch. If the couch is how Buck will realize that he has feelings for Eddie, I'm going to send a gift to everyone who's believed this theory since it first appeared. You're the real ones in this fandom.
If Eddie stays, I think we'll be getting more scenes with the couch. We could go from 3-2-1 to 1-2-3. Stay with me, and grab your imagination. We're going full in theory mode.
1 - Maybe we could have another scene, this time with Eddie alone on his couch? I could see this happening when he's packing, Buck not far away, and Eddie starts to wonder if this is really the right thing to do as his gaze lingers on Buck for a moment too long.
2 - We need two people on that couch again. I'm a big "Buddie first kiss in Eddie's kitchen" truther, but it could also happen on the couch.
Or they could have a big conversation together on it, that will eventually lead them to confess their feelings to each other later on. Maybe that's when Eddie decides to fight to get his son back, to not move in Texas? To confront his parents?
That's two scenes on the couch, two scenes where they don't really talk, even though the couch is an invitation to do so. I'd find it extremely interesting if their first real serious conversation this season took place here.
3 - Finally, we could go from Buck, Eddie and Tommy to something much better for a 3-characters scene on the couch, a configuration we've seen before: Buck, Chris and Eddie. It could even be the last scene of the season, and that wouldn't surprise me at all!
Just imagine: Buck and Eddie have confessed their feelings to each other, maybe Chris knows, maybe not. The three of them end up on this famous couch. Chris is in the middle, and Buck and Eddie look at each other over him, a smile on their lips.
Everything is fine, they've survived the end of the season disaster, Chris is back, they've finally found each other after years...
What an incredible parallel this would make with the beginning of the season! Where Buck was with Tommy, Chris away from his dad, Eddie depressed...
There, they could finally be happy on the damn couch. I have a very clear vision of this scene and I hope they make it a reality. We need our little Buckley-Diaz family together again. With buddie canon of course.
That's it, you've reached the end of this analysis-theory. I hope you enjoyed it. It took me 3 hours to write and I got lost in other theories, but hey! I had fun.
We're entering a 3-month hiatus so let's try to be kind to each other! Let's share our theories, fanarts, fanfics and edits to make this break a little more enjoyable!
If you want to give your opinion on this theory, you're free to do so here in the comments, or on twitter and bluesky (in both cases, I'm there under @/yamatomee).
Self promo mode, I write fanfics that you can find on AO3 under the username Beezethe! I have one coda about the buddie scene in 8x08, pure angst with no comfort... Feel free to give it a read!
#911abc#911spoilers#911show#buddie#buddiecanon#buck x eddie#evan buckley#eddie diaz#buck buckley#buckley diaz family#christopher diaz#bucktommy this one isn't for you#couch theory#buddie endgame#gay eddie diaz#bi evan buckley#fan theory#911 theory#theory#couch theory is alive and well#buck and eddie
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Can I ask for a Caitvi fic where Caitlyn apologizes to Vi for what she did to her at the end of act 1, and Vi accepts her apologies and forgive her?
The air is too clean.
Irrationally it pisses Vi off. It feels squeaky in her lungs. It makes it damn hard to breathe properly. It makes her think of her gas mask. It’s the same air that’s outside, just pulled through an endless series of gears and filters and spat out in a way that is hard to inhale. It’s the same air, just dressed up so it looks clean and untouched.
Just like everyone in this fucking room.
“Bring out the Guilty!”
She digs her fists into her thighs as everyone turns. Enforcers snap to the side as they lead Caitlyn in. The whole trial they’ve put her back in that Enforcer dress Vi first saw her in. Parade dress, Caitlyn explained once. She is on display, they don’t let her have the dignity of her usual uniform. They make a spectacle out of her.
Caitlyn wears it differently now. There’s a hardness in her shoulders and a coldness in her eyes that wasn’t there before. It’s been weeks of her sitting silently looking ahead for hours on end. She doesn’t move. She doesn’t even ask for water as she listens to testimony and agrees to charges. Aside from the words, the only sound in the courtroom is the occasional sob.
Even the chains around her wrists don’t make a sound.
They do now as she walks forward. She’s still the most dignified person in the room. Today they seem intent on changing that. The chains are now around her ankles too. They clink as she moves forward, still managing to look dignified. Even though they put the hat on her.
Even though they’ve fitted a muzzle around her mouth.
Mel has assured her that Caitlyn’s not going to be sentenced to death. When the battle came, she fought on the winning side. That seems to count for a lot more than Vi thought it did. Or maybe Vi’s just used to being on the losing one. The people still need a pound of flesh. It’s a litany that has followed her every time Jinx comes up.
“For your crimes against these peoples, we pass the following,” the voice continues, “House Kiramman will be stripped of its Council seat and its holdings. You will be stripped of you rank,” Vi grits her teeth, maybe that will be all, “you are sentenced to thirty lashes.”
The court erupts into shouts and chaos. But Vi can barely move. Her eyes find Mel who shoots her a look full of sympathy before her face goes blank again. Vi feels sick. Thirty is the best Mel could get them to. Vi doesn’t even want to think about what that must have taken. Caitlyn lowers her head but doesn’t otherwise react. Or maybe she does and the muzzle just hides it.
There is a bang from the high bench and the courtroom goes quiet.
Caitlyn is led out first. She looks straight ahead as they leave, never once do her eyes stray from the back of the room. Immediately people start scrambling and Vi realizes that they are doing this now. And everyone wants to get a good view. She scrambles along with the crowd. They’re shouting for justice but all Vi can do is bob through, trying to keep her eyes on the cart that pulls Caitlyn to the clearing.
The crowd swallows her up. By the time Vi makes it anywhere near the barricade, her chains are being wrapped to a frame in the center. They’ve already removed her muzzle but her lips are pressed together so tightly they may as well have left it on. Of course they wouldn’t. They want her to scream. Vi looks around for anyone who seems like they might be willing to do something. But she can find no allies here.
No-one is coming to stop this.
Vi wants to scream. She thought someone, anyone would put a stop to this. Caitlyn’s eyes are tightly shut as she tries to brace herself for what is to come. The Enforcer behind them continues to coil the whip for the crowd, building them into even more of a frenzy. It’s just a sea of cheering, moving bodies. Vi thought it was good cover. Now it’s just an obstacle to shove to the front of.
“Cait!”
She cups her hands around her mouth to try and make her voice travel. But it’s too loud. Someone behind her revs something. That sound is unique enough to make Caitlyn’s eyes fly open.
They find her, even in the crowd. Tears fill them, which only makes the crowd scream louder. The cold metal of the barrier digs into her palms as she stares back at Caitlyn. The helplessness makes her sick but when she goes to push herself over the barrier, Caitlyn shakes her head. Vi is ready to ignore her and do it anyway but Caitlyn turns away.
Vi jumps with her when the whip falls.
Vi can’t hear the crowd roaring over the blood pounding her ears. Caitlyn’s going to do this. Vi feels sick. Her facade doesn’t go fully up in the pause between strikes. Her eyes drag back to Vi’s and she is just smoothing her face back out when the whip falls again. Her eyes open and find Vi’s faster this time. All Vi can do is stare back and give her something to look at.
The fifth strike gets the first cry from her.
It shouldn’t be audible over the sound of the crowd’s roar, but Vi can feel it in her bones. Everything in her screams to get to Caitlyn. She can’t be right, this can’t be justice. In her worst moments Vi’s imagined decking Caitlyn herself. She told herself it would feel good. Now it just feels sickening. This isn’t justice. She doesn’t know what the hell this is but it’s not that.
The tenth lash makes her knees buckle. Vi’s sure she’s going to have imprints of the barrier permanently in her hands.
Fifteen.
Twenty.
Caitlyn looks at her desperately, questioningly. Vi pries her fingers away to tell her how many remain. Caitlyn drags herself up, as much as she can. Sweat and tears paint her skin, but she refuses to surrender the last bit of dignity she has. Vi holds up five fingers and Caitlyn manages to raise her chin.
Vi’s aware of two of Mel’s guards approaching but she can’t look away from Caitlyn.
It’s three more.
Red blossoms over Cailtyn’s shoulder when she stumbles forward. One of the lashes went high.
Two.
One.
“Keep them back!” Vi yells at them and shoves herself over the barricade.
Other Enforcers swarm forward. She’s ready to kill all of them to get to Caitlyn, but they rush for the crowd. Not for her. She’s free to tear across the clearing as fast as her legs will let her. It feels like moving through water to get there. It’s been weeks of only being able to see Caitlyn’s profile. Vi’s lied to herself that she’s fine with it. Now every second is torture.
Caitlyn is shuddering against the frame, face pressed into her own arm. She doesn’t lift her head until Vi is right in front of her, pushing back all the blue hair that sticks to her forehead. Caitlyn jerks her head up, eyes focusing in on her again. Whatever’s left of her facade breaks under Vi’s hands.
“Vi.”
“Hold on,” Vi says. Her eyes focus on one of the other Enforcers, “She did it, get her out of these!”
The Enforcer comes closer and Vi can’t stand it a second longer. She smacks the keys out of his hands. The second one of Caitlyn’s arms is free she drags it over her shoulder, ignoring the half sob that escapes Caitlyn’s lips as she jostles her back.
“Just hold on,” she repeats, getting the other cuff free. Caitlyn’s head tips against her throat, her hot breath panting across Vi’s skin, “I got you.”
Everything in her just wants to carry Caitlyn out of here. But Caitlyn has clung to her dignity every step of this. And Vi can’t bring herself to be the one to rob her of it. Caitlyn shuffles forward and Vi matches her pace. Step by halting step as the crowd descends into an actual riot. Vi has no idea how they are going to get away, but anywhere is better than here.
“Vi! Over here!”
Caitlyn shudders at the sound of Mel’s voice. Vi hesitates for a moment but Caitlyn sags in her arms. They don’t have any fucking time. Mel tried. She did more than Vi managed. So Vi takes more of Caitlyn’s weight and shuffles them to Mel and her waiting car. The sound of a gunshot rings out and she takes all of Caitlyn’s weight to close the distance faster. Mel is already in the car and helps ease Caitlyn inside. Vi throws herself in after.
The moment the doors close Caitlyn collapses against her. Vi barely manages to turn them so she doesn’t touch her back. Just the movement of collapsing is enough to make Caitlyn try to curl up. Vi touches the back of her neck and her shoulder, anywhere that’s not bloody and raw. She gets Caitlyn’s forehead on her thigh so she can breathe and lay on her stomach.
“Try to lay still,” she says.
“I’m trying,” Caitlyn chokes out around a sob.
“You’re doing good,” Vi says, the comfort tasting like copper in her mouth. She tries to smooth the baby hairs at Caitlyn’s nape away from the tallest of the lashes. One of Caitlyn’s hands claws up and she grabs it, locking their fingers together, “just hold on—“ she looks over “are we almost there?”
“Almost there, Caitlyn, just keep breathing,” she says, shaking her head to Vi.
A shiver runs the length of Caitlyn’s body. She’s going into shock. Vi looks around for anything with red on it. Red means heat. She cranks the knob as far as it will go. It’s not like they can put a fucking blanket on Caitlyn with her back like that. But maybe the heat will help. Something has to help. Vi can’t just sit there and hold her hand.
“Vi,” Caitlyn’s voice breaks around her name.
“I’m right here,” Vi says, tightening her grip on Caitlyn’s hand, “
“Vi I’m sorry,” she chokes out, “I’m so sorry. I was such a fool.”
The desperation in her tone makes Vi’s chest ache. Caitlyn’s bleeding everywhere but all she’s doing is apologizing to her. Vi tries to shove aside the burning in her eyes and throat. She looks around for anything she can do, anything but just sit here and hold Cait’s hand while she bleeds and squirms.
“We’re good, Cupcake,” she says, scrambling for anything that will help. Caitlyn just lets out another sob, “Cait, we’re good,” Vi says, surprising herself with how much she means it. They go over a bump and Vi feels Caitlyn cry out against her thigh, “can you be careful?!”
Mel shoots her a sharp look that Vi is happy to return. Logically Vi knows they are driving through a riot but there has to be something to make this easier on Caitlyn. The breathing against her thigh is getting shallower. Vi knows shit about medicine but she knows that’s not good.
“Cait, you gotta take a deep breath,” she says. Caitlyn makes a noise but doesn’t change, “come on, breath for me sweetheart.”
Caitlyn inhales properly and some of the tightness in her chest eases. She looks up to see Mel staring at them both intently. Before she can ask why, the car seems to break through whatever is making them move so slowly. Vi tries to hold Caitlyn steady as the car tips them back. Mel jumps forward and uses her hands to hold Caitlyn’s legs. Caitlyn’s fingers tighten on Vi’s knuckles and her other hand grips her knee.
“Just hold on,” Vi says, wishing she could figure out something better to say.
“I’m trying,” Caitlyn says but it comes out so desperate Vi wishes she would just go unconscious.
“I know, you’re doing so good,” Vi says, “we’re almost there.”
“Hold her!” Mel orders as the car takes a turn and then stops. One of the doors flies open, flooding the car with light and air, “Vi we need to step back and let them help her.”
When she tries to separate, Caitlyn grips her hand tighter. There’s going to be pain either way, Vi can’t bear to pull away again.
“I can’t,” she says.
There’s a hushed exchange and then a medic appears near her with a needle. Vi wants to swat him away but she knows this is for the best. It’s going to take away Caitlyn’s pain. At the moment that’s all that matters. Caitlyn stiffens at the contact.
“Hey, it’s ok,” Vi tells her, “he’s here to help,” she watches the needle push something through Caitlyn’s veins.
“But—“ Caitlyn starts to protest but Vi can already feel her relaxing, “Vi.”
“I’m going to be there,” Vi swears, “soon as you wake up.”
Caitlyn’s fingers try to squeeze hers but they go limp. Suddenly it’s just Vi clutching her hand. Mel touches he shoulder. Sympathy is painted on her face. Vi feels her fingers slip in between their hands, taking her death grip as Caitlyn’s fingers fall by her side. Medics pull Caitlyn free and onto a stretcher. Everything in Vi screams to follow them but Mel holds her in the car.
“We need to let them work,” she says. Vi opens her mouth, “Vi, this is how you help her.”
“I promised I’d be there,” Vi says, “I wasn’t—“
“You were. You got her through this,” Mel looks over he shoulder and she grasps Vi’s other hand. Vi can hear a commotion starting, “you will be there when she wakes up.”
“No,” Vi twists. She can hear a buzzing and the doctors shouting, “no—“
There’s a fiery feeling in her elbow and she realizes Mel stuck her with something. Mel moves forward and eases her down. Vi wants to be angry but the stuff is rushing though her. Still she has to hold on. Mel cranes her neck and then focuses back on her.
“They got her back,” she says, “you’re both going to be fine.”
“I promised,” Vi gets out, though it comes out as a mumble instead of how she intended. There’s a hand in her hair as the world tugs away.
There’s a hand on her cheek as it comes back.
She would know that hand anywhere, even before she opens her eyes to meet Caitlyn’s intent gaze.
Caitlyn’s covered in bandages. Her fingers and face might be the only thing not wrapped in bandages. But they’re both so pale it hardly makes a difference. There’s tubes and monitors everywhere Vi can see. But she’s alive and her fingers are skimming Vi’s face like she can’t believe she’s real. When their eyes meet, Vi can see they’ve got her drugged up. Vi catches her hand and laces their fingers back together.
“Hey,” is the only thing she can think to say. Caitlyn offers a miserable smile through pale lips, “I promised I’d be here didn’t I?”
“Mel had them put you here,” Caitlyn rasps.
“Yeah,” Vi says, “but I’m still here.”
That seems to be Caitlyn’s undoing. Vi has no idea where she can touch her that isn’t going to hurt. But Caitlyn doesn’t seem to care as she grips Vi tighter. It’s like three weeks of hell is all crashing down. Any last vestiges of the person on trial are flowing down Vi’s shirt. All Vi can do it hold her tighter. For the past few weeks she’s just watched Caitlyn and told herself it’s enough. Now with her back in her arms, Vi doesn’t know how she managed to bullshit herself like that.
“I’m still here,” she repeats and just hopes it’s enough for both of them.
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Act 3 mostly left behind the elements of the show that I was most interested in, and had the most to say about, but I do want to talk about episode 7, which was fucking gorgeous and extremely well done.
I've seen people say that the good timeline Ekko and Heimerdinger find themselves in is the result of Vi dying, as if this timeline is a Wonderful Life view to paint Vi as the 'real' jinx, but I don't think this makes sense (for one, I don't think this episode gives us a new perspective on Vi, and Vi isn't the one seeing this, so it isn't giving her a new perspective on herself, either).
No, the point of Ekko's half of this episode is to give him a new perspective on Jinx, by showing him who Powder could have been. Last season, he was the most prominent person to argue that Powder was dead, and that only Jinx remained within the girl he was once friends with. This is not an unreasonable position for him to hold, given that she's killed a bunch of his friends in the Firelights over the course of his resistance to Silco's regime.
But this girl he meets here is not Jinx, and when he sees her, he initially reacts with the same hostility he would to the one from his timeline. Even when he figures out that he's in a different timeline, he isn't able to get over that, to stop projecting the image of Jinx onto this young woman who's done nothing wrong and suddenly sees her boyfriend acting so cold and distant to her.
This culminates in him asking the (really insensitive regardless) question of whether she was the reason Vi died. He has so internalised the view of Powder as Jinx/as a jinx that anything having gone wrong must have been her.
But she shoots back that, really, that's on him way more than it is on her. It's downplayed in season 1, but Ekko is the one behind the inciting incident of the show. To wit, he rips Jayce off, charging him double for the stuff he's buying, and then sends his friends to rob the guy's place, little rascal that he is. It was a fun little prank for a kid to play on some rich idiot who could just bounce back from that anyway, right?
And then everything went horribly wrong! Ekko lost his mentor, his closest friends, one of whom came back different, as his home was turned into a twisted parody of itself, and he had to find himself a sanctuary from which to launch a resistance movement.
We're naturally drawn to compare this Powder and our Jinx, but I think the subtler difference here is between the two Ekkos. It doesn't get a ton of emphasis, but we see from the way the people around him respond to him that this Ekko was very different, too. He hasn't had to grow up way too fast, and take up way too many responsibilities for someone his age. He hasn't become as angry as the Ekko we know, hasn't had cause to rage against the many injustices of a system stacked against him on both sides.
This Ekko is a relaxed, content, brilliant and recognised for it, genius little inventor, with a beautiful girlfriend who loves and supports him in his endeavours, and a wider family looking out for him to prepare him to step into a wider world of great possibility.
The way he conceptualises himself, as a resistance leader, a fighter and a protector, a boy saviour, he isn't ontologically any of these things. He isn't condemned by fate to step into those roles, doesn't become them out of some innate characteristics he just has. He is that way because circumstances forced him to become that.
And the same is true for Powder, for Jinx. She isn't inherently a jinx, regardless of what anyone including she herself may believe. She isn't the manifestation of misfortune for all, and he knows this. When he took her down in S1e7, and Jinx showed the suicidal Powder inside of her, he recognised this, and it's what stopped him from killing her then (even if she tried to blow him up.)
Even in that episode, she confronts him about this, calling him 'the boy saviour' in a tone that's halfway to an accusation. 'Why didn't you save me?' is what she halfway chokes out, where was her saviour (much in the same tone she'd use for herself when announcing herself as 'your big fat hero', because she wasn't able to believe in that concept either)?
Neither of them was able to address the matter then, because Ekko was still reasonably upset about the people she killed, and Jinx was dealing with a lot of complicated feelings she was expressing with violence, but it's his time here, with this Powder that gets him to reconsider.
'I've never seen you give up on anything,' and all that.
It helps that he meets a different Jinx who is, with some effort, willing to let herself be saved without trying to kill the person saving her.
(And not to be too down on our Jinx, Vi's death clearly hit this Powder hard, and she never quite built up the confidence to pursue her own ideas as a result.)
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I would love to see the chain react to reader from the atla universe or just one that uses bending in the same way? Just using bending unconsciously and freaking them all out because of it.
I love Atla, I loved writing this! I didn't know what kind of bending you were expecting, so I did waterbending, I hope you like it.
A notice about orders; I'm doing them in order, so if yours takes a little longer, it's probably because I'm working on others, but they'll all be done! And I'm very happy with them too, don't worry about it, you can send them, I'm loving your ideas.
It was a hot sunny day, so much so that Chain mutually agreed to take a break to go into the nearby river. It was a calm river with a small waterfall that made a pleasant noise in the environment. Wild and Wind were the first to jump in, excited as children, well, at least one of them was one. I couldn’t have been happier. You could say that the water is my territory, so on a day like this, being in cold water was paradise for me.
Little by little, the others started to enter the river too. It was easy for them, they could just take off their tunics and equipment and get in, while I had to temporarily separate from the group to change and put on a bathing suit, but that was okay, it didn’t take long. Soon I was also entering the river to enjoy the sunny day.
The cold water touched my body bringing a welcome feeling of relief, cooling my hot and sweaty skin, but this moment of peace was short-lived after I felt a wave of water hit me directly in the face, followed by the sound of childish laughter. That brat. I imitated his attitude, pushing water with my hands towards him, hitting him with everything and stopping his laughter. The sailor still had the audacity to better himself with indignation, as if he hadn’t been the first to start. I could hear the others laughing in the background too, but they didn’t have the courage to get involved in this. Now it was war.
Soon the area of the river where we were became a mess of water being splashed in all directions incessantly. Until I could feel a particularly strong attack coming from Wind, and instinctively wanted to retaliate even more. The movements so natural to me happened without me even being able to think about it, soon a small wave, but bigger than any I could generate with my bare hands, appeared next to me and went towards the Sailor, strong enough to make him stay underwater for a few seconds, raising his head in surprise and confusion right after.
— Aha, I won! – I exclaimed excitedly, but my excitement died when I saw the lack of reaction not only from the sailor, but from all the boys. – What happened? Was I too harsh?
— How did you do that?! – Wind was the first to speak, coming towards me excitedly. Only then did I understand my mistake.
— Yeah, was that some kind of magic? – Wars asked, intrigued.
— I’ve never heard of magic like that. – Hyrule replied, looking curious and suspicious at the same time.
— Well, that’s because it’s not magic. – I replied, creating even more doubts in everyone, who remained silent waiting for me to continue. – You know, you may not know much about the place I come from, but there’s no magic there. On the other hand, there are people there who can have some control over one of the elements of nature, using specific movements. We’re called benders.
Even when I tried to explain, they seemed terribly confused and incredulous. Of course, they already knew I came from a different kind of world, and had somehow ended up here through a strange portal, but I’ve avoided talking about my home to them, precisely because I thought it might be too much for them to take in. Just as it has been for me.
— So, you can simply control the elements of nature? – The Champion questioned, not very confident about it.
— Not all of them, and we call it bending. There are four main types of bending, water, fire, earth and air. People who have this ability can only bend one of the four, with the exception of the Avatar. – I can’t tell if throwing all this information out was useful or just made the situation worse.
— That’s cool! – Wind exclaimed. – Show me more, that’s really cool!
— Well, that’s definitely interesting, could you demonstrate more of that? – Time asked, and I could tell he wanted to analyze it better.
— Yeah, what do you normally use it for? – Twilight was the next to ask.
— Well, waterbending can be used as a medicinal method, and each bending can be used for various everyday things, and for fighting.
— You mean you could have used it to fight this whole time and you just chose not to?! – Legend seemed indignant at that.
— Well... I already imagined it would be difficult to explain about this. – I replied, while using my bending again as they had asked me to, making a large ball of water float over the river.
— Cool. – Wild said. – Now that we know and you can use it, I’m sure it can be very useful.
— Yeah, you said it has medicinal properties? That would be really good. – The Traveler questioned, receiving a positive answer from me.
— Guys, you’re forgetting the main thing! – Wind said, getting everyone’s attention. – Have you thought about the games we can play with this?
Everyone snorted at the boy’s childish answer, when we expected something a little more important than that. I was afraid to talk about it with them, but they ended up being much more understanding than I imagined. That’s good.
— But I must admit that I’m very curious about this too. Can you show me other things you can do? You said there are four main bends, does that mean there are other smaller bends? – Sky asked excitedly, and everyone seemed as curious as he was about the subject.
— Hey, this would be really useful for forging swords, can you help me next time I work on the Champion’s sword? – The blacksmith was the next to ask, which created a gap for a flood of different questions.
— Can you close wounds?
— What exactly would an “avatar” be?
— How does earthbending work?
— Can I be considered an airbender?
— How do movements influence this?
Soon, I was surrounded by curious blondes and being drowned in their curious questions. I think we’re going to spend a good amount of time on this subject.
#link x reader#linked universe x reader#linked universe#lu x reader#tloz#legend of zelda#linked universe fanfic#x reader#atla
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Why “Defying Gravity” from Wicked is a perfect song for Sun Wukong
Hello Lego Monkey fandom, this is really my first post ever as I often don’t post stuff but I really wanted to share this BECAUSE I love both musical theater, Wicked to be exact and Lego Monkey Kid of course. So this is an analysis on why I believe this song is perfect for Sun Wukong’s character.
Beware Spoilers for both Wicked the musical and the movie
Some context is necessary to explain why I find this correlation for those not familiar with Wicked. In the musical, “Defying Gravity” is the end of act one, and is one of the most important parts of the musical, not only for the story, but for the character of Elphaba as well. Elphaba the wicked witch of the west, had been discriminated her whole life for being different, for having a green skin which made her be isolated, so she often tried her best to win people’s approval her personal dream being meeting the wizard of Oz, hoping to get recognition and love by working with him. But after he falsely accuses her for a crime she did not commit, Elphaba realizes she can’t win love that way, that she doesn’t want to spend the rest of her life being walked over, so she openly defies the wizard, saying “he is the one who should be afraid of me” showing her true powers as a witch, saying proudly no wizard will ever bring her down. Of course, Oz from there on starts seeing her as a villain and a monster, but she is true to herself now and unafraid to defy the authority of the Wizard.
But now how this applies to Sun Wukong?
Despite having different contexts, Elphaba and Wukong share a very important trait with one another. That being, how both defied a high authority in their respective stories, defying everything everyone else knew. Being unafraid to act and make a change, having the enough confidence and bravery to say that no one would ever bring them down.
Sun Wukong is know in media as a character that is not afraid to challenge those who stand in his way, no matter how big they are, he doesn’t let anyone walk over him and is firm on his beliefs. Of course, in the past is true that he used to be selfish and impulsive before his journey to the west, but in LMK even before his journey, something he had clear like we have mentioned before, is that no one had the right to walk over him, less the emperor or heaven. No one had the right to tell him who he was or dictate his destiny just because he was a demon. So this rebellious side of him wasn’t only to cause chaos, this side of him also show us how since always, he was confident and genuine to who he was and his people in flower fruit mountain and most importantly, was loyal to his own beliefs and fought for said beliefs even if others considered him a monster or harbinger of destruction. Just like Elphaba. He will defy those who think he should be below them just because he is different, he will fight those who want to bring him down and he will be loyal to what he believes is worth fighting for.
Now with these clear we can see the lyrics, and how I interpret them is they were from Wukong’s POV specifically the last part:
So if you care to find me
Look to the western sky
Literally, he was in the western sky as he did a journey to the west, he was in the western sky traveling with his master and friends to get the scriptures. Literally you can hear west and think about him.
As someone told me lately
"Everyone deserves the chance to fly"
The monk always helped Wukong as a mentor and was the guidance he needed when he was out on control on his life, so I personally viewed this line as something his master told him, and he then used it as a philosophy to think everyone deserves to fly, to be free, to dictate their own destiny and life.
And if I'm flying solo
At least I'm flying free
To those who ground me
Take a message back from me
This, this is how Wukong starts to defy heaven, the emperor. He may be alone, but he is free, heaven more than once tried to have him tamed, to have him controlled, to ground him but he refuses this control. Even when they put the golden circle on him, he never stopped fighting for his independence and freedom.
Tell them how I am defying gravity
I'm flying high, defying gravity
And soon, I'll match them in renown
His legend to this day is still known, he started everything as he wanted the respected of heaven and in the end he showed them he wasn’t inferior to them, the name Sun Wukong is a name they will always remember.
And nobody in all of Oz
No wizard that there is or was
Is ever gonna bring me down
Just imagine it, Wukong in the sky, with his staff in hand, confident, strong showing his power, being imposing. Looking at everyone from his position, thinking about the choices he has done, reflecting on his life. And then he says it’s, how no one in all China, no Emperor that there is or was is ever gonna bring him down. He flies free, while the people in heaven scream in horror and anger, calling him names, seeing him as someone evil and cruel but Wukong is happy, finally free from heaven and those regrets that brought him down. He remembered how it feel like to fly and won’t forget it ever again.
And that’s pretty much the analysis, this song tbh could be applied to when Wukong first defied heaven with the brotherhood or if he is in a similar situation like in Black Myth Wukong in where he already did his journey but he is still fighting heaven for his freedom and independence.
Even so, in the end I believe Wukong and Elphaba share this free and brave spirit that defied the odds when no one else could. In the end I just did this analysis for fun and using Lego Monkey Kid Wukong mostly for this analysis, but hey it has never been a crime to mix to hobbies so.
To conclude all I can say it’s that I love these two pookies and to please go watch Wicked and LMK as the two are gems ✨
#lego monkie kid#sun wukong#lmk sun wukong#wicked#wicked the musical#wicked the movie#elphaba thropp#wicked elphaba#musical theatre#song analysis#lyrics#did this for fun#lmk#lego monkey kid sun wukong
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