#and now this bIG BARA BITCH

[jkrin]

Oh cool a mascot horror visual novel, this should be interesting. I’m sure I won’t get jumpscared by my tendency to crush on spooky circusy characters. :)

[fea-resources]

Best Unhinged Commentary As RP Starters Pt.1

Preemptively shoot them. Double tap for the fucking idiot who came before you and didn't.

Shoot her anyway. Shoot her for having a crappy hairstyle.

You start doing some freaky shit like the padre, I'm gonna shoot you.

I'm serious. Don't fucking start turning into a Thing. I'll shoot you. This is a small ass house.

Marco...? Better not be a fucking polo around here.

Yeah but they'd taste bitchin' in the few minutes before you died horribly.

Anything else in here that I need, before I go? Besides ANOTHER HEART ATTACK.

THERE BETTER NOT BE ANYTHING ELSE WAITING FOR ME OUT THERE BECAUSE I WILL SHOOT IT IN THE FACE.

That noise was behind me... that noise was behind me, right? ...that wasn't behind me.

Why is there a pile of dead bodies here now? This wasn't here before.

My work place has rat traps so I guess they have vermin problems, and this makes me so happy because if I see one of those fuckers I'ma grab it with my bare hands and wow the whole store. Up my pay grade. I can catch rats myself!

Try anything once. ESPECIALLY once if its toxic.

She's your stalker girlfriend. You will be hers or you will not have the chance to be anything else.

Standing in the bushes. A great strategy. I love bushes.

I know s/he can go straight through doors, I just hope s/he doesn't go straight through THIS fucking door.

Go away, I don't want what you're fucking selling.

HULK WANT OUT. LET HULK OUT.

Its Hulk's weak bitch ass cousin.

You're right, I don't like any noise, because noise means bad stuff.

That fucking laugh though... "nyA HA".

The devil's brew and the devil's lettuce. How many other things does the devil have?

Gotta face your fears. Face them like a man. A big, burly man. A bara, even.

Best friends kill each other before the apocalypse.

That's not heavy breathing -- its purring.

MY SON ISN'T LIKE THAT. MY SON JUST WANTS AFFECTION.

I love the additions of the flies, but the lack of maggots and decay is upsetting.

She's just mad cuz her tanning bed turned her into jerky.

Ghouls in a box, much like kittens in a box, but now with fifty percent more mauling.

What, is fifty percent mauling not good enough for you? Is this year's model not violent enough? GOD, not everyone can keep up with your strict mauling standards.

Oh come on, my mauling standards aren't that high. I just assumed this wasn't the world of Hello Kitty or MLP.

How safe is the safe house, really?

S/he wants you to stay that bad. S/he's such a sweetheart. Clingy and murderous, but a sweetheart.

Hey look, its the slow mo brain juice again.

Its just a bullet to the brain, mate. Ain't that bad. I've taken a few of those.

Excuse you. That is called abstract art. And it is gorgeous.

Its the sound of forgiveness. Screaming and then silence.

Sitting here making noise on the sidelines with the desperate hope it gets you caught somehow.

Children are omens of death. Do not follow the pitter patter of feet.

I swear to god nothing better crawl out after me. I will throw my ______ and then regret it.

You think a door will save you? You're a stupid bitch.

And you are 100% faking death good sir.

I wanna lick every single window in this place. I'm not sure why, but I just want to.

Sabotage kitty.

Its me in the mornings, and the knife is reality.

He's 50 shades of dead.

Uh I don't wanna go in the church because... stuff happens in the church.

Nothing over here except that dude having a grand old time, just... slamming his fists into that body. You know.

I'm okay. I'm gonna be fiiine. Who am I kidding? I'm gonna get fucked. Hard. In a very unpleasant way.

RUN RUN AS FAST AS YOU CAN. YOU CAN'T CATCH ME, I'M THE ZOMBIE CRONCH MAN.

That's right, I don't have the hand axe anymore cuz I used it while I was in church, damn it.

Damn, you had a bad time. You lost your leg-- yeah, there's the leg.

Why do you eat so many bullets?

S/HE. FUCKING. ATE. BULLETS.

This house is aesthetic. That couch however... is not.

YEA BO- wait. What the fuck is this?

*Gets out the hose. Pressure washes _______ with holy water*

THAT'S NOT HOLY WATER. THERE'S NOTHING HOLY ABOUT IT, EXCEPT THAT IT FILLS ME WITH HOLES.

Dead raccoons smell a lot like melting brussel sprouts. Pro tip.

I genuinely forgot how to spell his name, and just don't care at this point.

Sell shit, be rich for about 5 seconds, then be poor.

Sky pervert you say?

Oh there you are. I tried to summon you like beatle juice but it didn't work.

Well you should'a said that chant over a dead possum. Then I would'a heard you.

Confession. I'm still hella weak for bunny tatas.

Ah, so polite. You're also like. My well of never-ending potions.

Every city looks pretty at night. They look better on FIRE at NIGHT.

Never mind. He looked better through the blurry window.

I don't know if this is weird but, does catnip... smell like tea? Cuz I think it kinda smells like tea.

I missed my chance to be Cool and say 'I've never snorted catnip'. I disappoint myself.

Dang you only had 8 dollars? You're a poor ass soldier, what the fuck.

I guess I WILL just... sound the alarm.

THE SHEEP LOOK LIKE MUPPETS, WHAT THE FUCK. THEY'RE SO CUTE.

I hate being blinded too... I say as I never wear glasses I need to wear.

*to the tune of shots* BUTTS BUTTS BUTTS BUTTS BUTTS BUTTS BUTTS

ANGERY BUNNY BUTT.

I WOULD EAT IT. BET IT TASTES LIKE CYANIDE AND HEARTBURN.

I hate those boots. I wish you'd just put on actual pants.

That dysfunctional wardrobe is the final boss.

Jar jar binks got big. Stronk stronk bigs.

Let _______ have the tittie of bitch.

My fingers are dyslexic, pass it on. Calling you stupid bone sausages out.

Angels don't talk about Eiffel tower dick.

Yeah, I ditched him. I don't even care if he's asleep. I ditched him.

All those burnt corpses look like bacon to me. Crispy dragon-charred bacon.

you're a COWARD. GO TO THE TOP. EMBRACE THE JUMP.

_______ looks like a hobbit, not gonna lie.

I told you your little child bearing bones would catch you! They're springy and resilient!

Congrdeurtions.

The deer pelt is surprisingly sterile. Its the most sterile thing in this fucking place.

My dream is to be able to spell astetic... asthmatic... antsthetic... antstatic... aunt stacy? You know what I mean.

I wanna lick the sugar candy in the sky.

Wait, I missed the corpse. We have to go back for the corpse. Leave NO man behind.

SOS jerky.

Adopt a child. It's time.

I was named after a slutty country singer. And a car.

Back in my day, we used beds and called it woohoo. Just like the Sims. That’s where all my Sex Ed comes from.

Back in my day, we walked 4 miles with ONE FUCKIN' SHOE, and we shared between 5 of us, through the snow, because I ate the other shoe.

And I’M the one that needs to pray?

Why did you come back to the kink dungeon?

Lucifer is still pretty hot, I hear.

NO. PLEASE. I'LL BE GOOD. I'LL CALL YOU MASTER AND WEAR A SHOCK COLLAR AND EVERYTHING.

Nah, I'm thinking of something ten times as traumatizing.

No fire. Only suffering. Face the dark and cold like a dragon.

Fucking capitalism.

Your kindling looks like dog turds, and I know my dog turds.

_____ WAS STRANGLING A RAT. I HEARD ITS LIL ANGRY RAT SOUNDS.

I'd imagine bodies that sit at 98 degrees F while doing nothing get pretty hot when pressed together and doing activities that raise your blood pressure. That's like a 400 degree sauna right there if my math is right. Pretty toasty. ....that makes me wanna never do anything cause that's HOT.

Good. Sex is bad - its how babies are made and we don't want none of that.

Condoms are a thing, but so are holes and accidents. Why do you think I'm here?

Pornhub is good to us... on what not to do. That’s where I found that shrek video, and Spongeknob Squarenuts.

Wood - the original forbidden fruit.

This is the least sexy sex dungeon, let’s be real here. No mood lighting, cold, no R&B music. Where’s the pizzazz?

Maybe they played music on the bones?

Do NOT. I have nightmares about that.

I can no longer look at a naked anatomical skeleton in all casual and comfort anymore.

I am very uncomfortable with naked skeletons.

______'s hair is Cheeto colored which is honestly such a look. You rub your hand through his hair, your fingers come back stained with neon orange dust. Cheeto dandruff.

Who's playing the meat sticks again? I heard the meaty slaps. I still hear them.

Alright. Go gather your quotes you quote whore.

FAKE. YOU'RE A FAKE. YOU'RE A FAKE ________ FAKE AS FUCKING SHIT.

Oh. I thought you were talking to me when you said fake and I was like "someone noticed".

There you go; _____ knows the lyrics. _____ knows nothing.

I mean... hi... leggy up... same diff. Greeting you with my leggy.

You know minus the fire, this is a very nice house.

I don't know about you but the fire is aesthetic. I think its an improvement.

Uh, holy shit, violent much?

See by this point I would'a been like "fuck that I ain't gettin' in that bathtub again."

I hope I can kill you. You already look like someone I wanna kill.

This is where shit goes to shit.

You know it is really unfair you are able to appear and throw that that well and hit me because the universe fucking hates me-- OH GOD.

NO. We don't HAVE to check it out.

Rename him Kibbles n Bits.

Calm your bullet boner.

There goes the neighborhood. Now it really is Silent Hill.

I'm not used to having the camera that close to my ass.

You know, this is a lot less screaming than I anticipated. Still good though. Still satisfying.

Be The Squirrel. A very big squirrel. And very destructive like a squirrel.

You totally want to go down the creepy hallway, don’t lie.

Seriously, what was with all the monkey comments in Twilight?

I took out mine quicker. Did you see how I swung the shIT out of him and he ragdolled?

Squirrel game not strong enough.

I’m sexually attracted to a library. *finger guns*

He just… spread his ass cheeks wide open for that death.

I don’t plan hiding places, I plot environmental hazard spots. Catch me taking random and increasingly dangerous routes.

To be fair, I dented the pole with my face. So it was a tie.

Flirting, _____ style: Light them on fire. Man that’s actually kind of a weird thing to say when you remember how many things and people ______ has lit on fire.

I assumed he would come back on Wednesday because he’d be out of weed. He’s always out of weed on this day. Weedless Wednesdays.

I may just suck at sucking.

Give me the cat nip.

Make sure you inhale with your stomach – inhale the maximum amount of glow.

Your fucking shit is mine.

COTTAGE CHEESE COMES FROM SWISS CHEESED DICKS. EVERYTHING I KNOW IS A LIE.

Today on "____ Ruins Everything".

Look at that goddamn library. I’d put my cottage cheese all over that thing.

HQ to ________. You’re breaking up. Over.

I’m sorry I keep breaking up with you guys, I just feel like our relationship isn’t going to advance any further.

I’LL PISS IN THE BENDY PART OF THEIR KNEE.

Bullet buffet.

If it fits I fuckings falls ins.

Its because I said Tits Save Lives, isn't it?

The feeling when you hear the word smoker and think of meat smoker first despite hanging with stoners…

Spider Pirahnas. Spirahnas.

WHAT HAPPENED TO MY SON? YOU PUT YOUR HEAD BACK ON RIGHT NOW YOUNG MAN.

WUT UP MY DITCH COUSINS?

I ain't even high right now.

HI, I HEARD THERE WAS FIRE.

________ confirmed for arsonist.

He didn't see you. He smelled you.

I still don't get how he does all this shit with them tight ass pants.

RIP his balls. RIP his life too. ________ is the real one stripping balls.

Sasuke Uchiha'd his ass to the future.

He scream at own ass.

No, that guy took it to the knee. His third knee.

I GUESS it counts as a bone.

Walked crooked for a month. Got roasted with anal jokes.

When life throws grenades, pick them up and throw them back. I DON'T WANT YOUR GOD DAMN GRENADES.

He found the mummified corpse of an old man holding his dick in his last fap session in his tomb.

Those aren't swords, those are Mammoth Cleavers.

...I'm not making those noises.

I'm a rat murderer and taker of treasure.

God damn it, you were supposed to be a magic charm to make these rare game come out and instead you hurt its feelings!

Let's not bring up our Lord and Savior the Helix fossil.

Don't make those noises. Makes me think of dirty things.

[the-girl-who-didnt-smile]

Retconned Names for “The Loa” (Hazbin Hotel)

I’ve decided to retcon the names of my DeviantArt OCs. These are their new names: 

Papa Legba (Papa Lébat) → Big Papa / The Doorkeeper

Damballah → Sir Duke / Grandfather Serpent

Baron Samedi → Baron de la Mort (The Baron)

Maman Brigitte → Maman de la Vie (Grann Manman)

Erzulie Dantor → Lady Love

Ogun (Ogou Feray) → Ironman

Erzulie Freda → Lady Rose

("The Baron of Death" and "Maman la Vie" are Scrapped Concepts. They are now demons named "Lanmò" and "Lavi")

They mostly have song-themed names now.

JoJo’s Bizarre Adventure!!!

To signify their importance to 19th century New Orleans Vodou, the characters inspired by Papa Legba and Damballah each have two names. Sir Duke is also called Grandfather Serpent, as a reference to “Grandfather Rattlesnake”, who probably has a common origin with Damballah. 

For now, I am still calling them “The Loa”, but I’m fine with changing this to “lesser gods” if that’s offensive. It’s pretty obvious who inspired the lesser gods!

I rant about the rationale behind this decision below the cut: 

After thinking about this seriously, I think it is irresponsible to name these characters after the actual deities.

I’ve grappled with this dilemma, since this really does break the naming convention of this show. If the St. Peter-type character is still named “St. Peter”, why should an exception be made? Because Vodou isn’t like Christianity. Christianity is the majority religion in America, and many other places in the world; Vodou is a minority religion that has this horrible history of demonization and mischaracterization. This goes all the way back to the 1800s (and earlier!), and has continued into the present day, with pieces of popular media like The Princess and the Frog and American Horror Story.

Whenever they appear in popular media, the lwa (or, characters named after them) are usually designed / written by people outside the Vodou community. As a consequence of this, outsiders have spread misinformation about Vodou and damaged the reputation of the community. Fans of Hazbin Hotel understand that these characters aren’t actually the deities they’re named after. But this context is not readily apparent to those outside of this fandom. If you don’t change their names, people will think that this show is trying to present commentary on the actual deities. Criticisms of cultural appropriation would be warranted.

We have to consider the popularity of a show like Hazbin Hotel, and the effects this has. If you search “St. Peter”, you’re not going to find “St. Peter (Hazbin Hotel)” in the top results. Again, Christianity is the majority religion in America. But if they existed in the cast, it is likely that images of “The Loa (Hazbin Hotel)” would pop up when someone searches for [insert name of actual lwa]. 

And this isn’t just any fandom... Let’s be real here. The Hazbin Hotel fandom is just full of horny little bitches (CAN”T RELATE!!!!). THE GOD OF WAR MASCULINITY AND BLACKSMITHING has no shot at ever appearing in the canon of Hazbin Hotel. But if he ever did, and his character design was actually good, there would be a shitton of bara porn of him…!

DUDE!!!!!! WHAT”S THE OPPOSITE OF A JIMMY NEUTRON BRAIN BLAST MOMENT????

IMAGINE someone going online, just trying to find information about how to pray to / perform a sacrifice for the lwa, and yeah. A bunch of Hazbin Hotel hen ties and hot ass yaois pop up!!!

STOP LAUGHING!!! 

In all seriousness, it’s legitimately awful!

This is why I think it’s just irresponsible to name them after the actual deities. It’s just really disrespectful to the people who worship them!

On top of this, let’s consider Papa Legba specifically. Here, my “Papa Legba”-type character is clearly this weird Steven’s Universe fusion of Papa Legba and Dahomean Legba. I actually think it is completely warranted to pay tribute to Dahomean Legba, as he is the spiritual father of all jazz and blues musicians.

It’s a show about singing and history!!!!!

But this is how Papa Legba is portrayed in New Orleans Voodoo:

Look at how he’s portrayed in art from the Vodou Renaissance!

Not only has he been widely misrepresented in popular media! He is arguably the single most important lwa from New Orlean Vodou, especially to someone like Alastor who was born at the end of the 19th century!

It must be COMPLETELY sacrilegious to equate Papa Legba with Dahomean Legba!!!

I love him so much….but if you’ve seen what Dahomean Legba looks like…you know what I’m talking about… (THERE”S A REASOIN HE”S LIKE THIS, OK???!!!!)

It is not AT ALL my intent to equate those two deities, but if this character is named “Papa Legba”, that intent is not readily apparent!

I’m also afraid that I made “Big Papa” look too goofy. THIS IS GOING TO BLOW YOUR MIND but not everyone reads One Piece. It pains me to say this…b-but even Edwar D. Newgate looks a lil fuckin stupid to people who don’t read One Piece…!

To people who don’t read One Piece, this really could be read as “Holy shit!! You’re trying to make Papa Legba – arguably single most important lwa from New Orleans Vodou – look like a goofy fucking idiot!”

NO!!!!! I”M TRYING TO MAKE HIM LOOK LIKE MONKEY D. GARP BECAUSE I LOVE MONKEY D. GARP!!!!!!

…But yeah. This is why I decided to just change his name. He’s just called “Big Papa” now. I’m also going to try to tone down the goofiness a bit more. I’m really not trying to make him look like a goofy fucking idiot. My intent is to give him range, where he can be playful but also dignified and imposing when the situation calls for it. I actually want him to be a cool character!

Anyways, here’s trivia regarding the new names:

For the most part, they have song-themed names. “Big Papa” is derived from The Notorious B.I.G.’s “Big Poppa”. “Sir Duke” is derived from Stevie Wonder’s “Sir Duke”. “Lady Love” is derived from Lou Rawls’ “Lady Love”.  “Lady Rose” is derived from Louis Armstrong’s “La Vie En Rose”. The two Erzulie-type characters are both “Lady–” something, and their names are references to love songs because they are goddesses of love.

Originally, I was going to call the Ogou Feray-type character GOD WARRIOR because I love Marguerite D. Perrin, but that’s a stupid fucking name, and you can’t give who is arguably the single most important lwa a stupid fucking name! He is now named “Ironman” as a reference to Black Sabbath’s “Iron Man”. I don’t know if Tony D. Stark would let you get away with this…but this is what he’s named in my fanfiction.

When I have time, I do plan to go back and fix up the tags and issue a notice on my AO3 account. It just might take me a while to get around to this.

OTHER CONSIDERATIONS FOR THE PORTRAYAL OF VODOU

Because I am FULLY INSANE, I love to think to myself “What if the boys were actually in the canon of Hazbin Hotel?”

OBVIOUSLY no NSFW merch should be sold of them. As far as merch is concerned, they should be treated like St. Peter (Hazbin Hotel). If any merch of them was sold, the profits should be donated to the New Orleans Vodou community.  Not the commercialized side of it, that’s full of white people who are bastardizing Vodou. The ACTUAL keepers of the tradition, who are going to be of African descent. The thought THE LWA getting turned into commercialized products is just horrible to me… Donating all profits to the people who should actually receive it would really make the world a better place!

I share these thoughts, but ultimately it really doesn’t matter AT ALL what I think should be done. What actually matters is the opinion of people in the New Orleans Voodoo community. If the approach is not to retcon Alastor and to add more Voodoo-related elements to the show, surely the creative team behind Hazbin Hotel should hire consultants with expertise and connections to this community.

For example, I imagine my depiction of The Baron of Death is controversial. I REALLY tried not to emasculate him, but I think his depiction could be read the wrong way. There is a side of Vodou that is accepting of the LGBTQ community; there is another side that is very much not accepting of it. The consultant should have the final say on whether it’s OK to make one of these characters an actual trans headcanon. If the consultant is like “this is really uncomfortable and disrespectful”, then this should go on the cutting room floor. As I’ve touched on before, even LGBTQ communities have a problem with misrepresenting minority cultures. It is more important to portray this culture accurately, and their deities respectfully. There are other creative ways to work in LGBTQ (specifically, trans) rep into the show!

Another example: The inclusion of Ironman. I’m so CRAZY for even thinking about this… Kratos (God of War) has no shot at popping into Precure! But yeah. I would not want to exclude him due to his chief importance, but it is in fact inevitable that the horny ass bitches (like myself…) in this fandom will draw bara of THE BLACKSMITHING WARRIOR GOD OF MASCULINITY.  If the consultant is like “don’t include him” for this reason, then just don’t include him.

Thanks for coming to my TEDx Talk!

[acre-age]

need to get this out now this is a madcom media perception related peeve I have.

all the wisest bitches around know that Hank J. Wimbleton is a fucking beast, right. Big, autistic, enigmatic and strange, killing machine, etc etc etc.

I love depicting Hank with all sorts of like beastial features, massive oni teeth, carnivorous maw, claws, huffing, visible breath, purring, and the glowing nocturnal predator gaze shit.

How fucking ever. The thing that fucking grates and irritates me and gets on my nerves is the fanon interpretation of Hank being a mindless fucking animal. Just like a dumb slobbering massive bara titted dog that has to be kept on a short leash lest they run off and hump someones leg. Thats fucking repulsive to me. I've seen this concept taken to extremes to the point of nonrecognition on so many fucking occassions.

Attraction is fine, fascination is great, and love of the character is wholly welcomed. That. Above. Is not Hank J. Wimbleton. Hank is intelligent and cognizant as WELL AS beastial. God forbid a motherfucker have nuance. THIS THING IS SMART. AND ALSO NOT HORNY. I DO NOT GIVE A FUCK ABOUT YOUR INTERPRETATION HANK IS NOT A SEX FREAK NOR A FUCKING ASSAULTER. CHRIST ALIVE.

[xxxevilfilms]

Manhole 3: Dick Rider

Info: Sol is now a regular at the Oasis, no thanks to Axl of all people.

Kinks: Cuntboy, Stripper/Prostitute, Himbo/Male Bimbo, Monster Cock, Cock Slut, Knotting, Come Inflation, Unsafe Sex, Clit Dick, Vaginal Sex, Excessive Come, Dirty Talk, Muscles, Bara, Huge Ass

Disclaimer: I actually really like the sluttification I'm doing to these men, so Manhole is officially a series now ig lol

Brothels weren't Sol's thing, but he made an exception for this one. The Muscle Cunt Oasis, although skeevy and vulgar as their name implies, was the only place Sol could go to to get his rocks off. Gear ruts were violent as they were unpredictable, an unstoppable force of nature that had him stuck in his shop, jerking it for days on end with no relief, knot swelling around nothing as his loins swell into a swaying sack, smothered constantly by trembling built thighs. Unmanageable and painful, Sol desperately wants to plunge his cock into the nearest pussy he could find, but no woman could take him even if they wanted to. He was too big, too thick, too virile, and too horny. Sol was condemned to a fate of fleshlights and fuck dolls until Aria woke up from her coma, but after running into a few cunt sluts during an evening stroll who gladly showed their pussies off to him, Sol was pleasantly surprised to discover they were from a sex club that catered to rutting Gears. After fucking those same whores in a dank alley way, in the presence of bashful eyes that scurried along the street when they saw him, Sol became a regular, noted for his big tips and even bigger cock. A lot of those boys fought over him when he paid the Oasis a visit, and while flattering, Sol found himself gravitating towards one slut in particular, a British bitch with long blonde hair named Axl.

Sol was at first very surprised to see him in such a filthy place, but the Old Gear didn't reflect on it much when Axl offered to throat his cock for free, long manicured nails fingering his tight pussy like he was a real girl. Sol didn't care at all that he was fucking his best friend after that and plunged Axl's holes for hours on end, until Axl passed out or Sol got his nut, whichever came first. He still can't believe Axl would even consider growing a cunt and slinging it around for money, but he supposed even go-getter idiots like him could get bored enough to try something new.

Or that's what Sol hopes anyway; rumor has it that most of the men who worked at the Oasis were forced into it by greedy Gears looking for a quick buck. Axl insists he's there on his own free will, but Sol isn't sure if those are the drugs talking or Axl's true thoughts. He should honestly bug him about it more, but he forgets each time he sees him; Axl had a way of shutting Sol up when he wanted his attention.

Axl made good money not only as a whore, but as a dancer, too, often found working the pole with a few other men if he isn't busy with clients. He liked taking Sol to the back for private shows in a locked room, showing off his clean-shaven shimmering pussy to the Old Gear, grinding it in his lap, rubbing his buried length with a fattened clit, swollen from drugs and constant edging. It slides against Sol's prick like a real cock, a short, soft and fleshy cock that protrudes from its hood like a man's dick. Sol has come to love playing it, likes stroking it, sucking it, pinching it, rolling it around between his fingers; a fitting cunt for a slutty hunk.

Sol breathes through his teeth once Axl has him on the couch, his movement slow and enticing, inciting arousal in Sol he had trouble suppressing. The young blonde rolls his hips in short, tight circles along his erection, dragging his ass flush against Sol's crotch as he slowly pulls his thong down, a pink piece of glittering string that barely hides his holes from view. It hugs the cheeks of his rear tight when he snaps it around his ass, skin rippling along shimmering flesh like waves on an ocean, tempting Sol with its heft and weight. Aside from having a pussy that can put most bitches to shame, Axl's ass was something to behold. It's silky smooth, soft, bigger than what a man or woman should normally have. For fucksakes, It jiggles when he walks and keeps going when he stops; it was amazing what that fucking pill did to him and Sol reaps the benefits of Axl's transformation without shame.

Sol gives that perfect ass a smack on its right cheek and squeezes, a move that makes Axl moan out a seductive giggle.

“Like the view, Chief?” He looks over his shoulder, neon lights reflecting off his glossy lips and glittering hair. “If you wanna fuck me back here tonight, I don't mind.” He spreads himself wide open then, obnoxiously long bejeweled acrylics digging into his skin as his hands literally lifts the flesh of his rear from his entrance to show it off. His hole matches his ass, bigger than what it should be and puckering around nothing, a well fucked hole left to hang open by weeks of intense training.

“Fucking slut,” Sol plays with the straps of his g-string. “Can't believe how much of a slut you are now.”

“Can't help it, bruv,” Axl smirks as he wags his ass at him. “I make pretty good money bouncing on horse dicks like yours~”

“Hey, I didn't say it was a bad thing,” Sol replied. “I like you better with a pussy anyway. All I gotta do now is dick you down to shut you up.”

“You should shut me up a lot more then,” Axl spins around and sits down in Sol's lap. “Especially if it means getting speared on this big thing; feels like someone's comin’ up on a rut~”

“You can tell, huh?” Sol pushes up into Axl's core. “I bet you like bragging to those bitches up front how big my knot is, don't you?”

“Fuck...” Axl flinches hard, clit visibly throbbing. “Is that what you plan on doing to me tonight, chief?”

“If your pussy can handle it.”

“Is that supposed to scare me?” Axl paws at Sol's fly. “C'mon now, let's have a look; all this fuckin’ around is gettin’ me wet.”

“Fine, fine,”

Sol pulls down his fly and unbuttons his jeans just enough to release his cock. He pulls it out by the base of his shaft, sliding it over tanned skin and a chiseled stomach to hold it up for Axl to see. A long, hard and venous prick many times bigger than a regular cock now rests between Sol and Axl. It stands over Sol's chest like a steel pole, leaking precome that rolls over a fleshy sheathe and a hefty knot that pulses with his heartbeat. Axl audibly moans at both the sight and scent of Sol's hulking length and eagerly clasps the dripping wet head with explorative fingers.

“Man, I can never get enough of this monster,” Axl smooths the glans with his thumbs and licks his pink lips. “You wanna do the usual, chief? Or do you wanna go straight to the main course?”

“The fuck you think I want?” Sol smirked, cock visibly twitching at his words. “Gotta get this down somehow.”

Axl grinned from ear to ear, expression matching his friend's.

“Main course it is then...”

Sol sometimes wonders if he'll keep coming back to Axl once he has Aria. He loves her, wants nothing more than to be physical with her as he is with Axl, but likes to think she wouldn't mind if he kept on this affair with his friend. Gears don't have the same values or views as humans, so Sol wasn't really worried that she'd mine; hell, she'd probably even encourage it.

Sol is taken out of his thoughts by Axl's rapturous moans, breathless squeals that Sol bites his lip at, eyes trained on the big white ass that bounces on his tanned prick. Hands and knees planted into the polished marble of the main stage, Axl fucks himself on Sol's prick fast and hard, jiggling ass cheeks smacking together and bouncing apart with each descent of his hips. It's a hot, sinfully delicious sight that has Sol reflect more on Aria, how hot it would be to have her and Axl at the same time. He could see it now, how tempting it'd be to watch Aria slide her girl pussy over Axl's studly one, fucking herself on his overgrown clit like a real cock as she sucked on Sol's, playing with his piss slit as she squeezed his knot. They'd take turns fucking him and fucking each other, swapping spit, sampling each other's cunts, cleaning Sol's come from their slits...

Sol growls, a rumbling one that resonates in his throat when he lifts Axl up to fuck him in the air, suspended by thick forearms that wedge themselves under Axl's thicker thighs. Axl yelps in surprise, but doesn't fight it, doesn't have a reason to. He merely succumbs to the pleasure coursing through him and lets Sol fuck him like the whore he was, pretty pink stiletto heels bouncing in the air as Sol ravished him from behind.

“Fuck yeah, chief, fuck me, fuck my slag cunt up...!” Axl babbled. “You're so fuckin’ big and perfect, I love it when you breed me with this fat prick...!”

“Yeah, you like this cock, bitch...?” Sol huffs, pressure in his gut building. “Like it when I fuck your cunt stupid?”

“Yes, baby, yes! You're the only one who can fuck me like this! I want your knot and no one else's!” Axl pinches his clit then, holds it tight and strokes the tip until he can't anymore. “I'm gonna come, baby, I'm coming all over this big dick...!”

Sol's knees damn near buckle when Axl comes, pussy bearing down on his prick like a vice. He squirts all over himself and the stage, cunt juice spraying from his piss hole like a geyser as it drips over Sol's knot and balls in rivulets. Sol is too out of his mind to even consider going easy on Axl and fucks his womb fast and hard, knot grazing soaked pussy lips.

“Slutty little cunt, so ready to take cock...” Sol holds Axl tight, almost painfully so. “Gonna make sure you're knocked up before the night is over...”

Sol fucked Axl's cunt one, two, and a then a third time with strong, powerful thrusts that takes the air from Axl's lungs, trying to wedge his knot into his friend's slit. It takes some work to get it to fit, but a final thrust that has Axl gasping and squealing is what finally helps Sol complete his tie. Immediately his knot swells and his balls tighten once his orgasm hits him, the old gear filling Axl with hot white seed that the blonde whore can't help but coo at. It fattens his stomach, bulges it out with virile come that's quick to settle in his womb. Axl has never gotten pregnant yet, but Sol kinda hopes that he does this time; Axl with a tight pussy and milky tits to play with would be hot as fuck.

“There's so much, holy shit...” Axl bites his lip as he tries to rub himself into another orgasm. “Your cock is so fucking perfect, mate, I wanna be your cumdump forever...”

“Fine by me,” Sol bites Axl's neck, slides his hands under a scanty bikini top to play with swollen bitch tits. “I'll knot this stud cunt so long as I'm alive and kicking.”

Suddenly, Sol starts humping into Axl, unable to pull out. Axl cries out then, on the brink of another orgasm, content to sit there and edge himself on Sol's prick. Once his knot deflates, Sol is gonna fuck Axl again and aagain, alternating between his ass, mouth, and pussy until he had nothing left to give. It's always like this for them and he wouldn't change a thing about it, at least until he's able to add Aria to the mix. He can't wait to have two beautiful cunts serving his cock, but he's gonna have to stick with this blonde burly bimbo ‘till he can make that fantasy a reality.

[void-spells]

Survivor! Finale!!!

Still grieving Cere...but I found her lightsaber! Finally I can return to my favorite lightsaber layout with Tapal’s and Cere's emitters!

Okay time to go kick Bode's ass.

Ah, sneaky infiltration time!! I'm sure no one noticed the big non-Empire ship just parked out here.

MAN it sucks that it didn't let me change Cal's hair up when he had the ISB uniform on. This is NOT a military-appropriate haircut!!

Weird place for an apartment at the end of a wide hallway?

Oh....a baby....hello!!!

Mookie...

OH SHIT!

Love Cal. Fully called this man a monster to his face in front of his daughter. He would give loud annoying gifts to kids who's parents annoy him.

Also??? Bode???? Why are you suddenly so stupid????? It's a whole PLANET dude! With like one and a half ways to get to it! And you want to JUST have you and Kata there??? How safe is Kata gonna be if you get hurt and there's no one else on the ENTIRE PLANET?????

Fine! Run bitch!

Wait huh.

Embrace

Embrace Cal’s WHAT??????

OH

OKAY

That was uhhhhh. I'm just gonna try and avoid that as much as possible.

SHIT I accidentally went Dark Mode

I DID IT AGAIN WHY WOULD THEY JUST REPLACE SLOW

Love Cal and Merrin talking it out to the sound of crunching bones

This is fine! It's all good!

Hop back to Koboh and it's FINE

HA I KNEW THIS PLACE WAS SUSPICIOUSLY ARENA-SHAPED!

Nasty Cal UNLOCKED

Huh. This is an elevator. Okay then.

Zee....still annoyed by her.

...and then I put Cal in a green outfit, stopped playing for the night, and didn't touch the game for several weeks

Realized the green outfit was NOT as cute as I thought it was. This red lighting in the menu is fucking with me

To Tanalorr!!!

Sidenote: Love when BD goes backpack mode with the bomber jacket bc the metal on the back looks like lil handles for his tiny feet

"GREEZY DOES IT BABY" I want that on a mug

Oh man Tanalorr is pretty....the water is reminding me a bit too much of the Pool Rooms tho

This game can't condition me to destroy every plant that sparkled and then do this.

Like why would they do that. Do you know how many times I shmacked a plant for nothing

BODE STOP BEING STUPID!! EVEN TOUR DAUGHTER THINKS YOU'RE BEING STUPID!!

Oh this fight is. Woof.

Ohhhhhhkay turns out if we don't get Nasty then Cal just has his skull bashed in to death. Got it. Embrace the Nastiness or die

Got myself a Drink after attempt number 3. Surely alcohol will help me play video game good.

Attempt 4.

5.

6.

7.

8.

Nine attempts later and Bode really just made Cal kill him in front of his kid like that. Fully attempted to strangle two people to death in front of his very young child, was given ANOTHER OPPORTUNITY TO SURRENDER, then proceeded to not do that. I'm sure Kata is feeling so safe as a result of your decisions, Bode. Rip you and your bara tiddies tho ig.

The entire scene of Cal standing at Cere's funeral pyre...non-stop tears. What the fuck man.

And now I'm sure they definitely won't make Cal "23-years-old,-should-be-at-the-club" Kestis raise a kid. Because that would be dumb. Right? Right? Not gonna make the kid who is still very seriously struggling with his own trauma suddenly be responsible for another kid, right?

So super cool how Greez gets another kid and Kata is like Cal's non-force-sensitive baby sister, right? Greez is gonna teach Kata how to cook, she's gonna be great at it. One big happy family.

Right?

Welp, guess I'm gonna run around some more! I'm gonna take SO many nice screencaps! And probably replay jfo. And cry.

[mjm5655]

💯 — share three random facts about yourself that your mutuals may not know about you.

munday asks // accepting ! // @auburniivenus

i'm tech savvy af. i enjoy building pc, & even helping friends put pc together that give me a budget they have in mind, & working out what would be best for their value, along with cpu/gpu preferences. also do a bit of overclocking. my current build, if it had not been for sales i took advantage of may have costed me like $3000ish to build, but it was a good bit cheaper since i'm a bitch for sales.

i actually really like old wrestling ... like when it was back in attitude era, that was the good shit, & yea, i'm a bit like majima, i see big bara men & be heart eyes. don't ask me what goes on now though, it kind of got disinteresting, all i know is kenny omega has a sephiroth entrance, & i think that's cool af.

i collect pokemon cards, started back when it was black & white sets, did take a break somewhere ? now i'm back into it, i don't go anywhere crazy like buying multiple booster boxes etc, i tend to just get one, & maybe the etb. i actually have a zipped binder half full of full arts, i intend to fill it someday. just, i want them to make a full art of haxorus, haxorus gets no fucking love, & he's my favourite. ;-; the only thing redeeming about this is that i did manage to land myself an axew shiny during the poke go fest last year on that app.

[schizophoenix]

4, 13, 16

4. Fav character/subject that's a bitch to draw

I love drawing bara/big dudes but I can never get them to look how I WANT them to. I like gore but it also gets lost in translation from head to paper

13. A creator who you admire but whose work isn't your thing

No one is coming to mind now, typically I like creator and their art

16. Something you are good at but don't really have fun doing

Lots of stuff, ADHD makes things I obsessed about suddenly annoying to me. Right now that is miniatures

[roadhogsbigbelly]

for context in response to the "man vs bear" debate that's been going for sooooo fucking long a prominent deaf gay Filipino artist made this comic

which while it did get a fair amount of likes and positive reblogs it did than get a large amount of backlash for being in very poor taste since it's portraying the situation as "women picking bear because she thinks men are icky" and not "women picking bear because they'd rather be mauled to death than be sexually assaulted which clearly shows a problem with how scared women are of men" and you can't even use the logic "well the artist is not american so he probably didn't have full context" because before he drew the comic he actually ASKED what the context of the "men vs bears" debate came from.

so yeah it sucks that he knew the meme was fully about sexual assault and still decided to make the comic anyway! especially when i know he could of sitll made the "bear means both animal and also hairy gay men" joke without the woman in his comic being a stuck up bitch, and it's generally really sad. he did later apologize and deleted comic but it's still pretty misogynistic.

than in response someone made this comic

and similar to the other comic it also got a fair amount of likes and positive reblogs but also some backlash, however the backlash was mostly do to the use of the term "hypersexual" which the artist did apologize for

and like i don't want to sound mean but i don't the issue with the original comic is that the gay men who made it is too "horny and cum brained" because that's kinda of homophobic? i think the original issue was that A) he portrayed the woman in his comic as being a bitch, which this comic doesn't really seem to actually acknowledge that aspect moreso focusing the misogyny being "taking a conversation about sexual assault and making it about how horny you" when B) the original artist was fully aware of the original context of the hypothetical and why it was so popular right now and decided the make the comic the way it is anyway.

which is an issue, from what i can tell one of things that tends to separate gay men from straight men in the eyes of many woman is that they can feel more safer with us because there isn't that fear of sexual assault, so deciding to take that safety and use it to make fun of women for their "very valid fears" is extremely shitty for a gay man to do i think he should feel bad about that.

but the way the like. "hypersexual gay furry strawman" is portrayed in the second comic isn't like that at all? he seems to just be unaware of the original context of the hypothetical because he's too "sexed up and horny" from wanting to fuck the big hairy bear daddy. which like. isn't a crime? like if the original comic didn't portray the woman in such a negative light, and the artist wasn't fully aware of the original context than it would of been fine? like yeah still in bad taste, but i don't think drawing a sexy bara furry man is actually like. that big a deal, especially because the term "bear" has been popular with gay men for a long time, way before the popularity of the hypothetical, and i think it's shitty to pretend that the issue is that "gay men need stop being so horny" and not "men in general need to stop mocking women for their valid fears of sexually assault" which like. is the actually issue.

saw a twitter artist apologize for misusing the term "hypersexual" because they didn't realize it was a serious medical condition, and they should of just wrote "gooner porn addict" instead and like. i'm not sure that's like. really gonna help or was like the actual problem.

[sunaswife]

A Suna Rintarou series

Summary: Suna was the best boyfriend you could ask for, after fighting with your inner demons that screamed you were ugly, worthless, and annoying. You finally decided to go the next step with your boyfriend, only to find out it was all a game.

A/N: PART 18 I started crying while writing this.

Warnings: underaged drinking, smut, guys talking badly about women, heartbreak, messed up shit that you shouldn’t do and a bit of fluff if you squint

Disc nine-slide two: Kageyama Y/N🤍

“Please tell me she’s lying. Tell me you didn’t agree to this. Tell me you didn’t think this was okay. Please tell me you didn’t encourage it.” You asked the three boys in front of you, they all looked guilty and that’s when you realized they weren’t as nice as you thought. “You fucking Bastards!” You raised your voice and threw the empty can of coffee at them. It hit Suna on his side but it didn’t cause injury due to his winter coat protecting him.

It all started when you dragged Suna along to the shrine. It was New Year’s Day and the second years all agreed to go together and bond as well as discuss of who will be next years captain. But he just wanted to cuddle and fuck with you as much as possible before your parents returned home.

“Baby please—let me explain. We quit the bet because we realized that it was fucked up. We even told Jamie it was over and everything..” Suna said frantically. You’ve never seen Suna act like this ever.

“Alrighty I’m gonna get something warm to drink. Do you guys want anything?” You asked as you looked at the four boys. You guys sat on a bench at the foot of the mountain. “Hot chocolate, please. Thank you Y/N-Chan.” Atsumu smiled. “Me too.” Hitoshi said “Me three.” Suna replied and you nodded. “Coffee?”You asked Osamu and he nodded. They began to take out their wallets but you shook your head. “I’ll pay.” You said and before they could protest you were already making your way to the vending machine. You ordered the desired drinks and you bent down to grab the last one. When you stood up you passed a familiar looking girl but didn’t pay her any mind.

You hummed and made you way to the boys. “Here you go.” You said and handed the proper drinks. “Atsumu is that you?” You heard a voice from behind and everyone turned to look at the girl you just passed by. “Fuck, not again.” He sighed as she made her way over.

“Who are you?” She asked with a brow raised as she looked at your appearance up and down. “Who are you?” You mocked and she smirked. “The girl who’s been sleeping with Atsumu.” She proudly said. “Um...okay? Was that supposed to make me jealous or something? I have a boyfriend.” You said and laced your fingers with Suna. He gave your hand a squeeze and you immediately calmed down.

“Girlfriend? ‘Tsumu is she the one you were talking about? The girl who was supposed to get her cherry pop by either you or Suna?” She asked and you spit your drink. The boys gasped. “Excuse me?” You asked with a brow raised. “Oh shit—you’re probably her. My bad. I have such a big mouth.” She waved off with an obnoxious laugh but the only thing you could hear was your heart breaking.

“W-what do you mean pop my cherry?” You asked and played with your fingers. Please be a misunderstanding. “Y/N...let’s just go. She’s clearly delusional.” Suna tugged your sleeve. You ignored him and waited for the girl to answer. “Exactly what it means. Atsumu made a bet with Suna saying that because he was so boring and quiet he won’t be able to seduce a nerd like you.—“ “Shut the fuck up—“ Atsumu stood up from the bench but she didn’t pay him any mind. “Suna decided to prove him, his brother and that bitch Jamie wrong and if he managed to do it then he’d get money. Jamie betted that Atsumu had a better chance. Has Atsumu flirted with you before?” She asked.

“He still does even though he knows I’m with Rin....” you said quietly. “Suna thought that playing your Prince Charming would get him and I quote that cooch.” She emphasized and you felt tears in your eyes.

You didn’t want to believe it at all. She has to be lying. But if she was...why did it all make sense?

“Please tell me she’s lying. Tell me you didn’t agree to this. Tell me you didn’t think this was okay. Please tell me you didn’t encourage it.” You asked the three boys in front of you, they all looked guilty and that’s when you realized they weren’t as nice as you thought. You didn’t need an answer. Their faces said everything.

“You fucking Bastards!” You raised your voice and threw the empty can of coffee at them. It hit Suna on his side but it didn’t cause injury due to his winter coat protecting him.

You couldn’t believe that either one of them would do something like this. “Baby please—let me explain. We quit the bet because we realized that it was fucked up. We even told Jamie it was over and everything..” Suna said frantically. You’ve never seen Suna act like this ever.

“Why are you so scared? What’s the worse that can happen? You already did what you did. You never had the audacity to tell me. Were you lying all this time?” You asked and he shook his head and took a step forward. “No—in the beginning yeah. But I quickly fell in love with you. I really really love you, Y/N. You gotta believe me. I was going to tell you eventually.” Suna said.

“Eventually?! Until how long were you going to wait before telling me? Our one year? Two? Four or five? Till we were married and had kids? How can you do something like that?! Treating something special—my virginity like it was a prize—a trophy! Was that what you were thinking when I told you I was ready?! Did you just decide to use me?”

“Of course not! Let me explain properly please, please, please.” He pleaded and his voice cracked. You could see his eyes gloss with tears. “There is no need for an explaination.” You told him.

“You two.” You hissed and looked at the twins. “Never talk to me ever again. I want nothing to do with you.” You stated and Atsumu tried to protest.

“Suna.” Your voice was as cold as the weather.

His eyes widened when he heard his last name.

No please don’t.

Don’t leave.

“I trusted you. And loved you. You took advantage of me and you disrespected my body. Take your stupid necklace. I’m done—“

“—I hate you.” Your voice cracked in the end.

You were so strong.

You weren’t going to cry in front of him.

In front of them.

“N-no babe please—This was a mistake please let me make it up. L-let me explain!” He started to cry and he got closer. You held the R of the necklace between your thumb and pointer finger and he stared at it.

Don’t take it off please.

Please.

When he looked into your hurt and watery eyes you yanked the necklace off. His eyes widened and he tried to grab you to ask for your forgiveness once again. But you neared him and hit his chest with the palm of your hand.

Right over his heart.

It hurt, physically, mentally, and emotionally.

“That’s how you make me feel.” You hiccuped and removed your hand causing the necklace to fall to the floor.

You turned around to leave but he held on to your wrist. “Angel, princess, baby please don’t do this—“

“Let go of me.” You hissed and removed your hand from his grasp.

You started walking away and he took a step forward to follow you but a hand stopped him, it was Hitoshi. “You guys are scum.” Hitoshi spit and walked the opposite way, going home. Suna stood there alone, the bitch that Atsumu was sleeping with was long gone.

She kind of looked like you too.

“She’s gone.” He whispered as more tears started falling down his face. The twins were tearing up as well. They felt like such idiots.

Their sun was now gone and all they feel is bitter cold.

It hurts.

A lot.

But you were hurting more.

Way more.

How are you going to face them tomorrow at practice?

Previous

Up next

Masterlist

A/N: I’m sad this chapter damn 😔 💔

@therealwalmartjesus @differentballooncollection @aaesuki @atsunflower @dope-squish @prettysetterboiss @june-phantom @tomo-uwu @austriasmariazelle @xrnia @katsulia @aprettyfruit @shut-your-eyes-kiss-me-goodbye @tvbiio @sun-daddy-yoriichi @kamenoyaki @ppangiiroo @loeyprivvv @kmskj92 @lovinnoya @tris-does-stuff @mokkeguts @sunaluvr6969 @bara-rose-would @sempiternal-amour @volleybloop @leykyuu @bokutoichigo @stfucanunot @tpwkatsumu @ohshirabu @shoutosimp @mqrinqcele @bokutosdivineass @anngelllla @toworuu @hidden-otaku-stuff @seijohiselite @caxsthetic @aquariarose @hhwanggu @bakuhoetoedoroki

[blackevermore]

x My (Actual) Vlad Headcanons

[ I love shit posting random things about Vlad, but I thought I’ll actually post my interpretation of Vlad and share it with yall ]

x So right off the bat my Vlad is kinda like a AU where (as we all agree PP didn’t happen and Vlad didn’t get water down to a basic bitch) Vlad gets a redem arc and Dani is brought back and they work out their relationship where he is now her father figure. Danny and he have a truce and Vlad becomes his mentor (and uncle/dad). He is no longer the mayor but continues to live in Amity. 

x Demisexual Demiromantic, i mean come on....20+ years of pining over the same woman?! Make sense.

x Bara Vlad....that's it. Man has big ol’biddies

x Vlad has full sleeve tattoos of ghost related things (because i read a fic with them and I have to have it) but like no one will ever believe that thee Vlad Masters would ever have tattoos that he got done in the Ghost Zone.... That also glow when he transforms (the lighting is active)

The Russian Cyrillic (I hope to god that’s right) says ghost/specter

The gave at the bottom with the orthodox cross says the year he was born ‘60 Masters. This is like a nod to the fact he “died".

Red eyes are a nod to Plasmius

He has another cross on his back in the middle of his shoulders

x Russian and German descent, first generation American, only child. Comes from old money that kept getting lost or stolen. Great relationship with parents, birth mother died when he was 10, first step mother died when he was 19. 

x Triple Major graduate in engineering, business, and supernatural studies in biology. Wasn’t able to graduate with his class due to accident, when he did graduate he didn’t walk across the stage. 

x Loves to garden and always enters the community garden completion. He plays fair and is such a sore loser. He has set his neighbors flowers on fire before. 

x Is the hot dad at every single fucking PTA meeting and always brings sweets. His favorite sweet is strawberry shortcake but he is very bias on who makes it. Has made a few moms cry.

x Has vampire and cat like behaviors due to his transformation that bleed over into his human form. His iris will change red and glow without him knowing. He lies and tells the the ignorant he has albinism since he knows not many people are aware albinos don't actually have red eyes.  

x Mentally this man is 45, physically his man is still 23 but thank god for stress, the lack of sleep, and facial hair for making him seem more in his 30s. Lets hope he never figures out what sleep is because someone will catch on that he looks really....young. Him now being half ghost has slowed down his age so much that he isn’t really sure how long he will live but he knows that it might be until the turn of the century.

x Treats Plasmius as his own person and always speaks in third person when talking about him. I really liked the headcanon I saw of Vlad not being able to accept that him and Plasmius are the same person and he threats it like an ego. Which ends up with Vlad making a dup of Plasmius to help him out around the place and he fucking talks to himself and answers. (Has been told his ego is “speaking” when he gets dramatic). Like how do you get in a fight with yourself sir?!?

x Was allergic to bananas and green tea.

x Loves nature hates everything that comes with it when being outside too long. But he will strongly uphold the scout honor like the man child he is.

x He is a organized hoarder and will give you a 12 page essay on why he hasn’t thrown out something yet.

x Owns three motorcycles, one for traveling, two for style, he owns three spot cars, a Rossie, and of course the family car which is a SUV. (yes I promise he can drive this time)

x Due to him willing to change for the better he becomes a lot dorker like he was in college.

[I’ll add more later]

[tainted-wine]

I don't know if u recieved this question before? But what make u like Hawks?

Wooooo where do I start?

What sucked me in right away is how charming he is the moment he appears. First of all, it was a big surprise seeing that this was the guy behind Japan’s top 2 bara men.

Look at ‘im! Tiny little bird boy!

And he’s just so expressive. And that’s not to say other characters aren’t, but dayum, what a first impression! 

Look at how animated he is!

Each and every movement was securing Hawks’s grip on my heart. This all happens during his introductory chapter!

Warning: Spoilers and me just rambling without any direction.

And then there’s his personality. Now, we all thought he was a bit of a douche when he first appeared. So did I...and I loved it! Watching him speak with no filter on stage was golden. Still love that diss on Endeavor.

Endeavor is lucky that he doesn’t burn easily or else that comment would have left him writhing in pain. 

Also while we’re here I wanna talk about a small anime change that always bothered me. The scene where he and flame daddy are out on a stroll.

This scene was meant to show just how amazing Hawks’s quirk is and how efficient he is at his job, chatting with Endeavor while handling problems left and right. I don’t think the anime captures the chaos around them well. Watch that scene and compare it to the manga panels.

There are feathers constantly leaving his wings and flying around. He’s talking to a fan while helping a granny far away from him. It’s clear that everything is happening at once, yet he remains calm and handles it all like a pro.

In the anime, they cut from one incident to another. It still gets the point across, but it feels a lot slower. Even when he was giving autographs, they left out the girls and kids feeling up his wings. When I first read this, I was overwhelmed, but I didn’t get that feeling in the anime! I was just really excited to see how wild that part would look animated, so it was a bit of a downer.

Where was I going before this? Right. So everything this bastard does raises himself on my Thirst Meter. Like, it low-key bothers me that he eats with his gloves on please take them off they’ll get greasy. But his gloved hands are hot so I ain’t mad. Hori’s art is hand porn.

And then Hawks shows off how he’s a legendary-rank support character. Rescuing everyone caught in the middle of the High-End fight, picking up falling debris, and also being a feather swordsman fuck I can’t handle this.

Also lol.

He proceeds to show us more of his deceptive skills by faking us out. Like that part when Dabi comes in and Hawks is like “oh no, poor little me only has my tiny feathers left. Whatever shall I do?”

But then we see that the sly bastard had a big feather at the ready. If Mirko didn’t come hopping in, he was ready to stab a bitch.

Dabi is a Fire/Dark type, so False Surrender wouldn’t have done much damage anyway.

But wait a minute....ahhh shiiiit Hawks is with Dabi! He was a bad guy all along! 

lol jk he’s a hero that’s pretending to be a hero who hates heroes and sides with villains thus making him a villain himself.

I LOVE IT.

Many fans call Hawks a morally grey character. This might be an unpopular opinion, but I don’t think so. I think he’s very much a good guy. He’s compassionate to the point where he sympathizes with everyone, villains included. He doesn’t like doing shit to appease the villains. He was so broken up about Endeavor’s injuries that his stubble fell off for a panel. AND THOSE LOOK LIKE TEAR STAINS, MY DUDES.

But he also doesn’t like seriously harming the villains. I never get tired of that somber expression when he realizes Twice isn’t gonna back down.

Some say that the speck in that panel might be a teardrop but it’s hard to know for sure.

Anyway I’m not here to talk meta cause I suck at that. I love Hawks because he’s a cheeky handsome good-hearted bastard who happens to be part bird and I love birds and I hope Tokoyami gives his wounded and possibly wingless ass a hug.

And a big thanks to @every-keigo for making panel-searching for Hawks super easy.

[roads-rise-to-meet-me]

Cyberpunk OC’s Incorrect Quotes Vol. 4

Is it that time again my dudes.  Vol. 1 Vol. 2 Vol. 3 Vol. 5 Valkyrie, Female Nomad V - Me Valiant, Male Streetkid V - @johnnysilverhandsimpressivecock Vixen, Female Streetkid V - @cappy-bara Virus, Male Nomad V @cappy-bara Jaz, Male Corpo V @cappy-bara Valiant: Question. When they shot Bambi's mother, did you find that a sad moment...At all? Valkyrie: I'm sure she's mounted on a nice wall in a fine home somewhere. --- Kerry: It'll be fun. Kerry: We'll make it a girls day. Kerry: Come on you punk bitch. Vixen: I can't believe I have to say this. Vixen: I don't have time to get tested for STI's with you tomorrow. --- Vixen: I was awoken by the sound of mockery. Where is it? Show me the object of ridicule! Valkyrie: I’m taller than Goro! Takemura: By one inch. Kerry: Hey, hey, don’t get…Short with your girlfriend, haha! Virus: Now, Kerry, I hope you don’t think little of him. Valiant: Ha ha! Yes! And, and uh…He’s short! --- Valiant: How are your breakfast burritos? Cashier: Disgusting. Valiant: I’ll take a jumbo. --- Takemura, After Valkyrie Threatens Him: You think you can intimidate me? I have been through hell. Valkyrie, Pointing To An Unconscious Valiant: Big deal. I’ve watched over this gonk for a year, so not only have I been through hell, I was conditionally in charge there. --- Kerry: You look like a corpse that was just pulled out of the river. Johnny: Wrong. I look like a cool rock star who just OD'd in his own pool. Big difference. --- Valiant: -Performing Sleight Of Hand Magic Tricks- Takemura: You know, every time you do this I check for my wallet. -Pats His Pocket- Valiant: -Pulls The Wallet Out Of His Own Pocket- 

---

Jaz: Takemura-san, I think you should play the role of my father.

Takemura: I do not want to be your father.

Jaz: That's perfect. You already know your lines.

---

Valkyrie: Can we circle back to your not at all weird and very detailed theories on our weaknesses?

Takemura: Oh. You do not believe me? That is fine. I will just demonstrate.

Takemura: Kerry’s weakness? Tech.

Takemura: Valiant? Fire.

Takemura: Vixen? Also fire.

Takemura: Valkyrie? Cannot act to save her life. Also, extreme hair envy with Vixen.

Takemura: Johnny? Crippling self-loathing mixed with overwhelming hubris.

Johnny, In Valiant’s Body: Woah woah woah woah. That is really personal compared to “fire”.

---

Takemura: I do not know how to tell you this, but you are in love with me.

Valkyrie: What?

Valkyrie: ...

Valkyrie: Oh my God, I am.

Valiant: What kind of confession did I just witness?

[moonlightflower21]

Dinner date?

A/N: a cute fluffy moment with the brute. enjoy~

Raphael's jaw dropped to the floor when the food he'd been trying so hard to cook was now burnt in the pan. It wasn't even salvageable, it was just burnt crispy stuff quite literally stuck to the pan. "Fuck!" He cursed, slamming his fist on the counter tops before letting out a small gasp. Not only did it hurt like a bitch, but he hoped you hadn't heard it. Too late.

"Hey Raph, everything okay?" You gently asked out, entering the kitchen. The nerves paused for a moment, allowing his eyes to truly take in how amazing you looked. You always looked so radiant but tonight, he wanted to go above and beyond to impress you. Yet, somehow everything just seemed to go opposite.

"Y-Yeah! I'm fine!" He shot up, accidently banging his head on the cupboard and momentarily losing his step. He whirled around, a nervous smile on his face as he gripped the spatula shakily. So having a posh dinner was definitely out of the question.

"Raph are you sure you're okay?" Your voice, yet again, snapped him out of his trance and he sucked in air telling you the bad news. "I'm fine, but the food isn't. I thought... I thought I'd be able to do it..." he sighed, looking at the floor feeling all the embarrassment go through his body.

"Uh, who cared about this fancy shit? U-unless you wanted-" "No, no it's okay-" "Good! Let's have pizza?" He smiled happily, taking you by the hand gently and guiding you to the dining table. "I'll be a sec" he smiled and you nodded, pecking his cheek. He sidled away, with a blush and practically ran to the fridge.

"I swear ta god Mikey there better be-" he opened the fridge but was met with pure disappointment, as there lay a pizza box but with crumbs inside. "Fuckkkk...." he groaned angrily, pacing the kitchen floor. He could sneak out and pick up some pizza but then you'd wonder where he was. He could send one of his brothers but the likelihood of them coming back quickly was 0.1 out of 10. This was first date with a human and it had been a mess. He put his hands on his temple, the throbbing in his temple becoming increasingly stronger ad the stress and anxiety settled in. What should he tell you? What would Leo do in this moment?

"I think it's cute Raph" to his surprise, you let out a small chuckle entering the kitchen. Holding his hands, his eyes snapped to yours in shock. Cute? Definitely not expecting that.

"But I messed up-" "We all do. The way you dealt with it, is a little funny" you giggled at the big bara who stared at you with surprise. "But the dinner-" "babe, you have a kitchen full of ingredients. We can cook something. I don't want this date to be so high class, cooking with you is enough of a date" you stepped forwards, your chuckles reducing to smiles at your boyfriend behaviour. He let out a breath, feeling the relief wash over him. So you weren't mad at him, he still had a chance.

"Let me do the cooking-" "Let us both do the cooking. It's more fun that way. Raph, you seriously don't have to try so hard. I love you regardless, you have my heart" you whispered for only his ears to hear, placing your arms around his neck to pull him into a loving kiss. He froze for a second, the emotions rushing to his head. As he kissed you, he couldn't help but grin into it. The thought of having a human girlfriend seemed impossible to him, always in fear that you'd leave him once you realised how much of a monster he was. But you reassuring him, that you were here for him made him feel some kind of way.

"I've gotcha babe" he chuckled, wrapping an arm around your waist leaning his forehead against yours so he could look into those irises he loved so much. "You're so beautiful sweetheart" he murmured, his honey orbs taking in every little detail of your face. From your smile, to your eyes, to your lips he was always in awe at how smaller humans facial features. And in this case, how gorgeous they looked.

"Speak for yourself, babe. You're so handsome" your hands cradled his face, thumb brushing over his cheeks in a soothing manner. He could only smile, and hold you forever in his arms. There was no sneer, just sincerity and love behind your words. And you can bet he would remember this for days to come. Even if this 'date' was a disaster, you were here. Making it all better again.

》》》》《《《《

i did not proof read, sorry for any mistakes! <3

[tellywoodtrash]

shaadi mubarak 11, 12, 14.09.20 lbs

11.09.20

bhagwan give me as much dheentness as kt.

lmaoooooo kusum eavesdropping on this juhi/preeti convo and facepalming over and over.  

poor kusum has to do the dirty work of getting rid of kt.

ugh tarun/rati.

lmao fuck off rati, she still not coming back to be naukrani to you.

preeeti classsy as fuckkkkkkkkk.

shouldn't have told them the plan. they don't deserve to know shit.

I NEED TARUN TO BE MURDERED IMMEDIATELY. LIKE 3 SECONDS AGO. HE'S LITERALLY THE RUDEST FUCKER I'VE EVER ENCOUNTERED ON ITV. LIKE, IT TAKES SOME SPECIAL SKILL TO ECLIPSE THE 4 LIONS MEN AND THIS DUDE GOT THEM ALL DOWN PAT, LOOKING LIKE THEY GOT THE MANNERS OF A SOUTHERN GENTLEMAN. FUCK. LITERALLY DIE RIGHT NOW YOU FUCKING HELLSPAWN GARBAGE FIRE PERSON.

every time rati says “pranaam”, my eye twitches from rage.

lol kusum's mad that she had to turn kt away.

bless sumedh, he's the nicest boy in this whole show, i love him so much.

what dukaaan do sumedh/juhi haaaaaaave?!?

KUSUMMMMMM, YOU JUST PROMISED THAT YOU WOULDN'T TALK ABOUT THISSSSSS TO PREETIIIIIII.

kt also has zero hope.

he's sooooo earnestttttttt, while talking about preeti and her talent. i adore that about him.

lmao preeti doesn't get kusum's sass.

KUSUM IS HEADDDDDDDDDD CHEERLEADERRRRRRRR!!!!!!!!!!

omg she's soooooooooooo me, this is exactly howwwww i motivate my friends!!!

lmaoooooooooo ghoom-phir ke everything comes back to having sex and babies with someone who was essentially a stranger.

poor preeti. i really do get her side as well.

lo aa gaya rejection waala phone call.

i love kt's mom's saris. they're so simple and classy.

oh kt, you teddy bear of a man. i wish you happy thingsssssssss.

WHY DO THEY RANDOMLY GHUSAOFY THESE ROMANTIC TYPE OF  SCENES???!?! IT'S TOO FUCKING EARLY FOR THIS. YES THEY CAN'T STOP THINKING ABOUT EACH OTHER BUT IT DOESN'T HAVE TO BE ROMANTICALLY CODED AT THIS POINT.

kt's momma bear is very wholesome, but this family coddles him waaaaaaaaaaaaaaay too much.

kusum's being pissy and taking out gussa on khaana.

poor kajal, juhi, and preeti. kisi ko koi idea nahi how to sambhaalofy kusum's ubalta hua gussa. my god, i fear this is beyond the superpowers of sumedh too!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

12.09.20

preeti seems to have watched suno chanda and is using the flower petals on the pankha method to apologize/cheer up.

but lemme tell you, no average desi mom is ever gonna appreciate this method. COZ WHO THE FUCK IS GOING TO HAVE TO CLEAN UP THIS MESS HAAAAN?!?!!? EK TOH GUSSE MEIN HOON, UPAR SE MERA KAAM BHI BADHAA DIYA.

omg preeti's playing songs to manaofy herrrrrrrrrr. this is truly the most wonderful love story of this showwwwwwww.

LMAO KUSUM'S FACE.

oh no. kusum is Big Mad.

oh boy, aastha gonna take the brunt of this.

LMAO “ghar waapis chodne ki zaroorat na hai, raaste mein koi peepal ka ped mile toh wahaan thaare ko taang de; wahin pe sookhti rehna!”

kajal is alarmed by this threatttttt.

blah blah blah kt and mom love fest.

oh ho, there's some financial masla between chacha/chachi and kt's parents.

kajal is hellllllllaaaaa cute, i love her the most.

piyu is here to throw thanda paani on everyone's attempts.

why does piyu have SUCHHHHHH gile-shikwe with kusum? why doesn't she get that she's all bluster, but a goddang softieeeee on the inside?!?!!?

preeti be like child, you don't know tf you're talking about.

ok i don't really agree with this way of parenting, but like.... whatever, i get it.

PREETI KNOWS HER BESTIE SOOOOOOOO WELLLLLLLLLLLLLL.

KUSUM HAS PLAYED REVERSE CARD!!!!!!!! WE LOVE THIS FRIENDSHIPPPPPPPPPPPPPPP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! THE MOST WHOLESOME EVERRRRRRRRRRRRRR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

lmao preeti realllllyyyy making her work for it, i fucking love ittttt.

“kab se apne saheli se baat karne ke liye mere pet mein dard ho raha tha, pata hai??!” “saachi?!?!!?!”

OMFG THE CUTEST.

the way preeti's face truly lights up when she's talking about something she's passionate about, it warms my cold, dead heart.

this sudden cough of kusum's is very fake and suspicious.

saamaan pohunch gaya? oh boy.

I KNOW THAT VOICE THAT'S HUMMING.

THAT'S RANGEELO THAARO BEEND, PREETI.

this incorrigible mannnnnn!!!!!!!!! 

THIS THOPDA LINE MAKES ME WANNA BREAK SOMETHING.

oh no. jhoomar has fallen. please don't let this be an awkward romantic moment.

LMAO KUSUM'S SHEER GLEE AND JUHI'S HORRIFIED FACE.

kusummmmm is sweetesttttt. she convinced juhi too!

hein abhi piyuuuu ko juhiiiiiii se kyaaaaa masla hai!?

this shoddy work doesn't bode well for you, KT.

LOL THAT DUMB MOLE, AND HER FACE AT HIS EXPLANATION. I LOVE HER FACE SOOOOOOOOO MUCH.

KT's like his own walking talking wikipedia page.

lmao, kaam kaisa laga, he asks; standing amid the ruins of this kaam.

“ji buraayi kaisi? itna badhiya baandha tha ki seedha sar pe aa gira. aur kahin nahi gira!” LMAOOOOOOOOOO PREEEEEETI I LOVE YOUR SNARK

thaaari best fraaaand ne bataaya ki tu yahaan milegi, aur kaise?!?

THIS MAN IS A CHILDDDDDDDDDDDDDD.

14.09.20

kt-saa is flashing best puppy eyes while talking about equal division of labour. dunno about preeti, but i'm convinced.

ugh agarwal is gonna be a dodgy client, isn't he?

PREETI YOU TOO SOFTTTTTTT, YOU NEEEEEEED KT TO HANDLE THE CONFRONTATIONAL PARTS.

ok those taars look fucking unsafe as fuckkkkkk.

HE'S LITERALLY A CHILD LOOKING AT  A CHRISTMAS TREE.

kuch bhi kaho, he's a quite a good judge of people. very much like a puppy that way.

lmaooooooooooo preeti walking away while grumbling about how kusum repeated literally everything to him like a totuuuuu.

please tell me the juhi/piyu backstory (and possibly tarun’s involvement) is gonna come out alreadyyyyyyyyyy.

kusum ain't no fool. just tell her already.

OUFF MANHOOS PHONE KO ABHI BAJNA THA.

i feel like i've seen this red kurta that piyu is wearing on shrenu in the ib redux??? something very similar anyway.

anyway, something reallllll shady between juhi/piyu. it's that fucking tarun. i'm sure of it.

KT YOU ARE LIKE A DOG WITH A BONEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

abbe this agarwalllllll.

OH HO PREETI, LISTEN TO KT!!!!!

ooooooh samoseeeeee. i want.

legit my reaction to foood too. excitement and heart eyes and happy wriggles.

ok just coz she knows your preferred condiment to matar ke samose doesn't mean that she knows you enough to go into lakhon-croreon ka business with you.

DUDE I WOULD KILL FOR A SAMOSA RN.

agarwal a fucking fraud. also a rudeasss bitch.

AGARWAL KA, RATI/TARUN KA, CHANDA KA, SAB KA BADLA LEGA RE TERA KTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT!!!!!!!

KT-SAA GONNA GARAJ BARAS SAAWAN GHIR AAYO ON THIS FUCKER.

oh preeti, come hereeee. *massive huggg*

kusum holding courttttttttt and all the kids happily giggling at her stories. my heart is warm.

preeti trying to break the baddddd news.

this kt/kusum alliance is bloody amazing. though i can't wait till it's a lil more equal and kusum starts calling kt on his shit occasionally. that's when it'll shift gears into peak comedy.

LMAO WTF HAS KUSUM DONE TO THE ROOOOOOOOOM

damn i really love all the furniture in this room. i'd loveeeeeeee to have these handicraft pieces.

lol kusum last minute mein looking for the cockroach in the back of preeti's blouseeeeeeeeee

preeti ko chodo, kusum itself is gonna fall asleep on her feet.

ugh fuckkkkkk agarwal.

AWWWW YISSSSSSSSSSSSS KT IS HERE TO READ HIM TO FILTH.

kusum and fam showing support with aankhein and smug smiles.

DAMN KT, I DIDN'T THINK YOU'D BE THIS CUTTHROAT. GOTTA SAY, IT'S KINDA HOT.

ugh preeti, you're tooooo fucking nice. kya zaroorat hai ab bhi iska kaam karne kiiiii??? 

PLEASE WELCOME THE NEWEST MEMBER IN THE RANKS OF WARRIORS WHO'LL FIGHT FOR PREETI'S AATMASAMMAAAAAN: KT-SAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!

———————————————————————    

thank the heavens; preeti has finalllllllyyyyy made the decision.

[darling-daydreaming]

Haikyuu captains as the obey me brothers

Because I’m basic af and I got inspired by a SMAU. Might make a list about the undateables

Lucifer- Daichi

-Older brother/father-type figure of the group who do their best to handle things maturely. Except for the fact that both of them have terrible tempers and will resort to violence/scolding a lot of the time. Both also give off that sexy dom energy that bitches seem to like (it’s me, I’m bitches but I don’t like Lucifer-)

Mammon-Oikawa

-Now this could just be because they’re both my favs from their respective series, but listen I have a type and apparently that type is “Boys that have a high status but are actually just kind of dumb and rlly cute dorks”. Now Mammon is definitely fluffier than Oikawa in some aspects but both have that underlying theme that despite their statuses and power, they both seem to have a sense of self hatred. I also just think Oikawa would look good in Mammon’s outfit (Oh god Mammon in Oikawa’s plaid shirt outfit tho-)

Leviathan-Bokuto

-At first I only put Bokuto here because this is literally the only space left but the more I think about it, it actually kinda makes sense??? In like the weirdest way possible???? So both have their moods, obviously, Bokuto’s whole emo thing and Leviathan with his thing about normies. They also both have their relative obsessions (Levi w anime and Bokuto w volleyball) and their whole life just kinda centers around it. In retrospect, Bokuto w a long ass tail also sounds rlly freaking cool.

Asmodeus- Terushima

-Both are characterized by being pretty and horny but that’s about it. There’s more to them than that though and there’s other aspects of their personalities that should be explored. They’re both also very flirty and I feel like Terushima pays as much attention to his hair as Asmodeus does to painting his nails

Satan-Kuroo

-Hear me out, these two are fucking N E R D S. NERDS I TELL YOU. Kuroo’s rivalry w Daichi and Satan’s hatred for Lucifer are also v cool dynamics that I wanted to play w here. They both thirst for that juicy knowledge and are pretty at the same time like fuck you guys. Also cats. That whole thing. And it turns out that Satan and Levi actually have a pretty good relationship and dynamic? They’re the more introverted brothers so it makes sense that it’s something they’d bond over. Whereas Kuroo and Bokuto are the more social ones so that could be why they get along so well. Also pls give me Kuroo literally being birthed by Daichi that would be the funniest shit ever-

Beelzebub-Ushijima

-I have a second type and that type is “hella himbos w big bara tiddies that are also massive dorks” while part of me did want to put Ushijima as Lucifer, I feel like him as Beelzebub is more fitting given that both have a general demeanor of being quiet but also having the presence of someone extremely powerful.

Belphegor- Kita

-sleepy sleepy sleepy boy. Now I’m gonna be honest, I don’t know much about Kita other than he loves his grandma, he’s a rice farmer, he’s a responsible captain, and that Osamu’s scared shitless of him. But I could also see him as the type to be really cold to someone (especially if that someone just kinda barges into his space) until he warms up to them, then he just gets kinda clingy and never goes away. Also Ushikita twitter art is cute and I would love to see more of this dynamic.