#and now im just worn out and tired and all idk

[catkin-morgs-kookaburralover]

okay im having existential thoughts and wanting to do some ... less than ideal things rn BUT i just remembered what i broke down over at work today

staff member was introducing me to her mum who also works there and just got back after ages off sick. anyway. she introduced me as 'shy and very reserved. and very quiet.' and there was another staff member there who i've also worked with and she said 'yeah very shy.' and i just??? i short circuited rather because one of the things i hate about the way i am at work is how pushy and overbearing and arrogant i am bc i think i know damn near everything, or something like that. which i obviously dislike.

but??? my coworkers say im shy and reserved and quiet???

whut???

and while i was processing all that (while feeding a resident who was fortunately Not looking at me at the time and everybody else was occupied, just as well bc i was over there crying) i remembered a song i loved as a child and haven't heard possibly for literal years

copying the full lyrics from google, though at the time i only remembered the last couple of lines and the first three quarters of the first verse:

How deep the Father's love for us How vast beyond all measure That He should give His only Son To make a wretch His treasure How great the pain of searing loss The Father turns His face away As wounds which mar the Chosen One Bring many sons to glory

Behold the man upon a cross My sin upon His shoulders Ashamed, I hear my mocking voice Call out among the scoffers It was my sin that held Him there Until it was accomplished His dying breath has brought me life I know that it is finished

I will not boast in anything No gifts, no power, no wisdom But I will boast in Jesus Christ His death and resurrection Why should I gain from His reward? I cannot give an answer But this I know with all my heart His wounds have paid my ransom

and anyway i was repeating that veryvery softly to myself for the rest of my shift and every time i got to 'make a wretch his treasure' i couldn't actually finish the sentence out loud

[donnyclaws]

I was gonan make a post apologizing for lack of regular art but I feel like jts already clear im sporadic and in and out of it bc chronic pain and circumstances. So for now I'm gonna hibernate, get my health steady again, deal with money issues, and art will happen when it happens.

[waywardsalt]

ive spent like 20 minutes trying to world this eloquently but i give up; im a big fan of linebeck just. not being capable of watching over kids not the person to be the guardian of a group of young people he struggles to take care of himself at times and has so much shit going on that it takes about one conversation with oshus for the old man to realize that this guy is. not doing great

[dykexenomorph]

I seriously think the bos was created specifically to piss me off........that was 100% the intention

[our-celia]

:(

[worstsequence]

🤪

[scudslut]

too sweet

daryl x fem!reader

warnings: 18+, mdni

a/n: okay, is this like the song? IDK i listened to it on repeat tryna decipher shit and come up with a good plot but i think i got a little lost in the sauce, or maybe im just being mean to myself🫢 ANYWAY I HOPE YOU LIKE IT ANON BYEEE🤍

you two never got along, never saw eye to eye.

years you’d known each other and all it ever did was reveal those differences all the more. highlighting them in bold letters for you to gaze at thoughtfully, but did that stop you?

it was a game you played, back and forth for so long that it became a routine. bicker and disagree till you were blue in the face and at each other's mercy for only the moon to bear witness too.

how many times had you dug into him for his habits. he smoked, kept to himself, he fought, but where had that ever gotten him? it was against your nature. a way of being that you genuinely could not understand.

and he’d be right there with you, matching each dig with his own. you were sweet, too soft. you pleased and walked among ice like you weighed as much as a feather, so predictable it was almost humorous. if you didn’t understand him, he was absolutely riddled by you.

“how do ya sleep at night? huh? don’ya ever get tired of keeping everyone so fuckin happy?” he’d mutter, all the while tearing articles of clothing off of your supple skin, one by one. skin that was pristine by default and worn as if only heaven itself had touched it.

“believe it or not, i actually want people to like me daryl. i like when i can make people happy. it’s not a fucking act,” you sneer back.

who was he to talk? he lived inside his own head. could go days… no, months by himself, not muttering a single word to a breathing soul. and you’d tried to reason, guide, and help, but if anyone knew daryl dixon, they knew he didn’t budge easily. he had to want it for himself and he simply didn’t see the glory in your people-pleasing nature, as he’d like to call it.

sure he saw the value in it, somewhat. but he liked things the way they were, as they were meant to be. if he disagreed with something he sure as shit wasn’t gonna prance around trying not to hurt no feelings.

“alright, you keep tellin’ yerself that, princess.”

so what was it that kept you two coming back for more? why was the tension and aversion between your minds so magnetic between your bodies? he wanted to snap those annoying, pretty lips shut with his. maybe if he kissed you hard enough something would click in that head of yours. maybe he could fuck some clarity into you.

his fingers would rub fast circles over your clit, watching you keen and moan into the pillow beneath you, “how’s that princess? good enough for ya? hm?” he’d mock, “faster? slower?”

“god, would you shut up already?” you tried to sneer only for it to come out as a breathy whine, adding fuel to his pride and smirk across his face. your lips crashed into his in an attempt to diminish it but it was right there, now pressed up against your face, and fuck, why was that so hot? why was his rugged stubble, his long hair kissing your shoulders, and his broad, strong body so infuriatingly sexy to you? muscles built from years of fights, kills, and hunting. you didn’t like it… but you did.

“fuck, i’m gonna-“ you cried to him softy.

“nuh, uh. not yet pretty girl.”

his belt was loud throughout the quiet room. your eyes were squeezed shut in pleasure but you heard the familiar clanks and zips, and then you felt his weight above you — warm and spicy. it pulled you so far and close that you sucked him in before he even got his pants all the way off.

“fuckin’ christ girl,” he groaned, snapping down to meet your hips flush. it was rapid and hot, both of you pouring all your frustrations into each push and pull. frustrations with each other, frustrations with yourselves that you liked this so fucking much.

he fucked you deep and hard like his body hated you, but somehow kissed you so tenderly through it all. his tongue massaging and tangling with yours as if you created his oxygen for him.

“so fucking sweet, princess, y’know that?” he whispered against you, “no good fer me.”

he was telling himself that; convincing himself and you knew it. your body rolled to meet his quickly, feeling every gooey, warm muscle against your skin and drooling over it, “more.”

as if to prove a point he slowed down, pulling out till just his tip was caught at your entrance, and then would thrust in, hard. over, and over, and over until you were singing his name and muffling it with his neck. warm and spicy.

“ya like that? thought ya wanted faster?”

he knew he was walking a line, but what had you guys ever been but a definitive line? a clear distinction of night and day, the only time ever seeing eye to eye being these moments. as one.

you were sent over the edge instantly, spasms of pleasure rolling languidly through your body. the tight swelling of your cunt causing daryl to finish with you and fuck if he didn’t cum the prettiest, sexiest way you had ever seen. straight out of your dirty, teenage fantasies and above you to soak in while you wreathed along with him.

he groaned and cursed into your chest, riding out each wave until he was shaking above you and so sensitive he couldn’t help but hiss as he pulled away, flopping down beside you.

a cigarette was quickly fished from his strewn jeans pockets and placed between his lips, lighting up and rolling back into the pillows lazily. every ounce of mending and merging you had just done was palpably tossed out the window, your scoff loudly filling the silence.

“that will kill you one day, hope you know that,” you muttered whilst gathering your clothes and slipping them on.

he didn’t bat an eye, nothing he hadn’t heard before from you and honestly, he didn’t really care. plenty of things in the world that’ll kill you, your naivety being one of them.

“lemme guess, gotta be up bright n’ early? tendin’ ta all yer charity cases?” he mused as he watched you head for the door. there had never been a night you’d spent together, probably would end up ripping each others faces off alone in room together for that long.

he didn’t get an answer, just an amused eye roll as you opened his bedroom door, “bye daryl.”

and then you were gone, quiet stomps heard as you floated up the stairs and he knew it would only be a matter of days before you were right back here, glued to his body and singing his name like you needed him to survive.

“figures,” he mumbled, taking a long drag from his smoke and smirking softly to himself.

what’s that saying? opposites always attract?

[a-little-lostmoon]

some LU headshots in my style for personal reference. subject to change bc drawing consistently is a bitch but overall i think i’m happy w them! (ignore the comic/writing idea in the upper right corner it may or may not be made into a full think idk yet—)

typed notes for each lu member + a little extra below cut

wild—

oval eyes

rounder oval ((ish)) face

amber earrings

healed scarring

androgynous

i tried to reference the boys’ canonical character models to individualize their features more. i love botw and totk sm but personally i’m not the hugest fan of the way the characters look for it? even so, i think the rounder sort of eye shape works really well for my wild

his colors specifically i drew to be a bit more sunset kissed/orangeish bc i was referencing a wild photo in which the time was sunset. thats abt it. but i think it’s really pretty on him so i’m probably just keeping that whenever i draw wild

warriors—

cheek bones/jawline

rounder ears

pointy eyes ((eyeliner that could stab a person))

cheek scar bc i felt like it

i stole away some of wars’ side fringes, forgive me i couldn’t decide whether i wanted them to cover up his jawline and chickened out. if anyone actually read the comic thing you’ll see smth abt the old man and wars talking abt how his hair parted to the other side of his face during the war. i made it to ‘vent my frustrations’ bc i drew his hair part referencing HW photos of link instead of LU wars and it’s now become my headcanon.

his hair color is vivid bc HW color pallet is pretty damn vivid and his eyes & earrings are a deeper blue to match his scarf. color coordination!

anw he’s a pretty boy so i made him pretty — that’s pretty much the rest i have to say abt that

time—

tired eyes

longest ears

(slight) rbf

both time & legend have half circle/oval eyes ((kind of. at least that’s what i tried to go for to give them a more worn/serious look))

i’m not the best with differentiating ages. i tried to make him look a bit more worn/oldest but i also wanted all of them to still carry some of that classic pretty boy link look. don’t have much else to say but he has the longest/angular ears bc fairy boy. let’s pretend four’s don’t look longer than his i drew him later and forgot

twilight—

<-takes more features from malon ((who i haven’t drawn yet so you don’t have any reference on that))

pretty boy face (wasn’t intentional but it is what it is)

twilight princess link is v pretty. twilights usually one of the more rugged (for lack of a better term) looking ones bc he’s among the taller ones/apart of the “adult” squad but i accidentally made him very pretty looking. oops. don’t know if that will remain consistent for him if i draw him more so we shall see

him and time share less features than i might’ve wanted? you can see a bit of time’s jaw in the way his face curves but overall they don’t share many features. again, he takes more after malon. but their hair textures are incredibly similar if that means anything

gave him jade studs bc they reminded him of midna and are practical enough that he can just keep them in the whole time (bc he will lose them or forget abt them if he takes them off)

sky—

rounder face

big eyes

lips

big ears

his hair color was a bitch to get right im not sorry i had to say it color is so hard to work with. in any case! skyward sword link has bigger looking eyes cus of the style and i just ran w that. his earrings are magenta to match sun’s dress but look red when the light catches them right (or wrong ig bc they look red in dim light too) just bc i realized his earrings were red to match his outfit/crimson.

sky and the next three (everyone sans wind) probly look the least off their character models

legend—

oval iris

full rbf

multiple piercings ((this is important for u to know))

longer narrow face & features

boy’s a strawberry blond bc i said so. and also legend purple eyes propaganda. i don’t know where exactly that originated but like i love it and im on board. he also has purple stud earrings he always keeps in — curious, isn’t it. he probably has more than i gave him but well, thats all i gave him. it gets the picture across. hc that legend realized he couldn’t get more fingers for his rings but he could get more piercings that could handle jewelry that did almost exactly the same thing. practicality!

also i couldn’t decide on legend’s hair length. its all hidden by that hat of his so i just… didn’t draw the back half portion of his hair. does that make my legend bald at the back of his head? you decide.

hyrule—

wide face narrow chin

freckles!!!

bigger earlobes

the earlobes is me projecting /hj but i tried to reference the og link’s face shape for him which idk if i like yet. he has freckles and more accent colors in his hair and eyes which is a subtle thing but a sorta maybe reference to his fairy magic. no piercings for him! i forgot them/didnt see them on og link and can’t really imagine when hyrule would ever get the time to pierce them so he and wind can do that together eventually to bond. legend will do it probly — he obviously has the experience and wild can’t be trusted (offered to pierce winds ears with a knife canonically)

wind—

big eyes

void eyes

big ears but rounder than skys

soft face

fluffy hair

wind’s 100 yard stare *does* things to the chain but none of them tell him that because he’d definitely use it to freak people out. i couldnt decide between going lighter sun bleached hair wind or bright blinding yellow toon link hair so i kind of meshed them together to create that. tried to make him the youngest looking

four—

symmetrical angles ((and then i drew a polygon quadrilateral bc thats the shape i used as a reference)) for cheeks and eyes

minish feather ((earring))

minish ears & nose

hime bangs

yk the picture of a minish that comes up when googled? thats what i used as a reference for his features. ears specifically, nose somewhat. four’s eyes are usually the greyish hazel color you get from mixing all of their colors together but i liked the split look for this piece more. his hair color is also wind’s but inverted so wind’s lights are four’s highlights and his darks make up the brunt of the base color as a slight reference to how it’s occasionally theorized/hc that wind is four’s descendant.

and the hime bangs were bc i wanted a little more “link side fringe” variation and i thought the sort of straight cut looked nice. hime bangs are not the right term tho bc he parts them to the side and doesn’t have that straight cut on his forehead but i’m too lazy to fight the correct term

— thank u for reading, go hydrate and eat if you have not <3

[spideyanakin]

Spidey it's like you WANT me to collapse to the floor and just sob this isn't okay stop hurting love of my life sirius

it's the tragic beauty anon again I am giving myself a flower because I know I will be back

(seriously though you've got me obsessed w this series it's so good)

❀

omg hihi im so sorry 🤭 (idk if i am actually)

Im so glad you like it! I have so much planned for these two, so I’m happy you’ll stick around for it 🙈🙈 I’ll give you some hurt/comfort to attempt and mend your heart!! ft. dobby

summary - malfoy + slytherin! reader, you heal sirius after a fight with his father, ft. dobby and regulus

warnings - mention of child abuse, regulus helping dobby (I thought it was cute), mention of blood

all I think about now - masterlist

His father has done it again. It had all gone too fast to comprehend. One second Sirius had replied to him, some dumb thing when you thought about it. A mention of dumbledore’s new achievement with the ministry of magic, and suddenly it had Orion Black shouting insults at his eldest son.

Sirius didn’t even mean to reply, but his father had forced an opinion out of him, and suddenly the two of them were arguing over the delicate china plates and crystal glass.

You had to watch, hand firmly resting on your silver fork as Walburga attempted to calm her husband down, ultimately sending fiery words towards her son as if he had been the actual cause of it all.

The mashed potatoes, vegetables and roasted boar your elves had prepared over the watchful eye of your gouvernante and your mother were long forgotten, but you now feared that they would suddenly remember diner and start throwing it at each other.

Great.

It had only been a few hours since the Black’s had been arrived at the Malfoy manor for their yearly stay, and like every year as you attempted to have a welcome diner, the Blacks proved once again they couldn’t stand being in the same room as each other.

Like every year it took Walburga a decent amount of time and strength to get the two of them out of the dining room and out of the way. Like every year your brother mumbled something about Sirius not being good enough for you before retreating with your father to his study, and like every year you sat in the kids drawing room with Regulus (which you begged your mother to redecorate but she refused too, as soon enough ‘you and Lucius will have kids of your own’.). Naturally you were still kids to them, so into the kids drawing room you were trapped until further notice.

The two of you would play wizards chess, until eventually Sirius would join you. He’d melt into your side, and you’d kiss his forehead as he muttered a tired and worn out "who won".

"Regulus."

It was always Regulus.

But this year, things hadn’t happened like usual.

You saw the flash of colors before you heard the screams.

You and Regulus shot up from your seats, and ran out of the room. You followed the sounds, Walburga shouting something before her and her husband disappeared into another corridor.

Only when you reached the entry hall did you see him. Sirius, desperately clutching to his arm, wincing in pain as he was hunched over a chair, Dobby by his side, jumping and squealing incomprehensible words at the sight of you.

"Dobby only wanted to cross to the kitchens miss! Dobby didn’t mean to intrude!"

You watched, confusion written all over your face as you tried to make sense of his words.

And that’s when you realised, Dobby was clutching his arm too; he had been hurt.

"Please, please don’t tell the master," he pleaded as he walked over to you, clutching at your skirt.

"It’s fine, I won’t tell father," your voice was gentle as you snapped out of your daze. "Regulus will take care of your hand," you eyed the boy at your side who looked at you with wide eyes before scurrying off with the young house elf.

"My love," you approached Sirius with careful steps, crouching down to his level and gently placing your hands on his knees. "Let me take care of you."

Sirius wiped his tears away as he tried to straighten his back to meet your gaze.

And that’s when you saw it; the blood trickling down his cheek.

"I don’t what spell he used- he-"

"Shh, it is alright darling," you moved a strand of loose hair away from his forehead. "Can you walk?" He nodded as an answer. "Let’s go upstairs."

So Sirius trailed behind you, your hand tightly holding his as you walked him through the dark corridors of the manor. He was glad you knew this place like the back of your hand, purposefully avoiding the places you knew you would cross yours or his family.

You closed your toilet seat and sat him there, before scavenging for things in your bathroom cabinets.

Bandages, desinfectant potions, anything that could help the bleeding boy in front of you.

"Salazar, I wish we could use magic in these circumstances."

"You could do anything and get away with it, dove. The minister of magic and Dumbledore love you."

"That’s a lie." You rolled your eyes before continuing your scavenging.

A few frustrated huffs later, you finally reached for him with a warm towel.

"This might sting."

"Ow."

"I told you it would sting."

"Like the singer?"

"Pardon?"

"He’s a famous muggle, you wouldn’t know him." You blinked in confusion, watching as Sirius’s grin took his entire face.

"You are really an enigma sometimes, Black."

"You love me for it, my future wife," he squeezed the small of your back where his hand had been resting.

"Surprisingly, I do. Future husband."

You missed the smile on Sirius’s face as you looked at his wound—visibly wincing. It was lodged right between the arcade of his brow and his temple. A little closer and it would have hit his eye-blinding him and leaving a nasty scar.

"That bad?"

"Nothing I cannot fix." You smiled at him, kissing the crown of his head before continuing to clean it and readying the bandages. "How is your shoulder?"

"Thought he dislocated it, feels better now," he hummed as he patted it.

"Do you remember the spell he used?"

"No," he shook his head, biting his lip at the memory. "Felt nasty though… dark. Sounded weird too, like some weird muggle medication or something."

"Muggle medication?" You raised an eyebrow.

"Muggle remedy, like potions for us. They call them with Latin names like spells. They are some really funky ones."

"Right." You chuckled at the sheepish look on his face. "And where did you learn that?"

"James."

"Sirius, James is a pure blood."

He looked at you like a child caught with his hand in the candy jar.

"We sneaked into a muggle university two weeks ago."

"What?" Your eyes went wide. "Sirius-"

"He wanted to know what science was! Lily mentioned it before we left for the summer break. And plus he’s taking muggle studies next year."

"And you followed him?"

"Yes."

You didn’t really know what to reply. You didn’t know if you should be mad, or curious about his finds in the muggle world. The part of you that grew up taught to hate muggles and non pure bloods wanted to scold him, but another part of you genuinely admired the courage Sirius had to defy the world you were born into.

He didn’t care for pure blood manners. He didn’t care to be proper. He didn’t mind muggle borns when you still struggled even speaking to some.

You had made efforts with Lily, and he seemed to be proud of you for it.

But the mere thought of walking through a muggle riddled street made your entire body shiver with something you weren’t familiar with. You didn’t know why. It wasn’t something that came as easy to you as it did to Sirius. It didn’t mean you were totally against the thought of speaking to muggles, but the mere thought of voicing it made fear prickle at your stomach, and the images of Sirius being mistreated, scold, bullied and hurt by his parents flashed before your eyes.

You were terrified of your brother enough as it was, you didn’t need to give him a reason to be mean to you.

A faint knock broke the turmoil of your mind, you turned around to see a familiar set of eyes and the tip of one of his big ears poking out the door.

"You can come in Dobby," you smiled as you watch him wobble through the doorway.

"Dobby wanted to thank Miss," he proudly showed you the bandage around his wrist. "Master Regulus was very kind." He nodded. "Dobby wondered if you needed anything."

"We are good Dobby, thank you."

But the elf shook his head. "Dobby needs to thank Miss, Dobby wants to thank Miss."

You looked at Sirius’s wounds before looking back to the house elf.

"Well, I am not allowed to use magic outside of Hogwarts, and i know you have been taught healing spells as of recently." You bit your lips and Sirius’s lips curled into a smile as he read your mind. "I am sure Mr. Black would be pleased if he did not have to walk around with those ghastly cuts on his face and horrible ache in his shoulder"

Dobby’s eyes seemed to light up as if you had personally given him the holy grail. He bounced closer to Sirius, nodding to you with the biggest smile as he flicked his fingers towards Sirius.

In a flash of warmth and sparks, the bandages you had so carefully placed upon him disappeared, and the cuts were closing by themselves. The only trace left of the night being the faintest scar across his temple.

"Speak of this to no one alright?"

"Promise miss!" And with a flick of his fingers, the elf was gone.

"Well, look at you, all healed and handsome," you grinned as you brought your lips to his.

"I like him. When your parents kick the bucket do you get to inherit Dobby?" Sirius grabbed your hand, guiding you to sit on his lap, peppering your neck with kisses once you did.

"Unfortunately no…" you sighed, relishing in the feeling of his lips on you. "Lucius is heir to… um.. well most things here." You frowned upon the realisation, Sirius stopped to look at you, by the look in his eyes he could tell you had never really given it a proper thought.

You’d never thought of what would happen once you graduated. Once you were officially Mrs. Black and your time at the Malfoy Manor would become a distant memory. He watched you realise that everything you thought you owned was a mere illusion.

"Well, if it’s any reassurance we get to inherit Kreature?" Sirius winced as he mentioned his grumpy house elf who was never really fond of him, and you chuckled at the look on his face. "If that old twat is still alive by the time my parents finally decide to do us all a favour and die, or frankly scratch that, if im still alive by the time we graduate."

"Sirius!"

"What?" He chuckled at the appalled look on your face. "At this rate it will be a miracle I’m alive for our wedding, and don’t you dare say you haven’t thought about using an unforgivable on my father!"

You didn’t reply to his accusation. You’d never dare to voice such a horrible thought the way Sirius did, but it didn’t mean he wasn’t right.

He took the smile you were trying to bite down as an answer and pecked your lips in recognition.

"I’ll always be here to save you, Siri."

"Promis?"

"Promis."

[iconsumedmygoldfish]

i do not trust whit young.

spoilers for drdt. like, all of it so far. as of ch2 ep16.

whit as a character just isn't adding up for me. his reactions to things have been wrong up until now, or at least not as prominent as other characters. not necessarily saying he's a mastermind, or evil, or a david-chiem-type character, but i don't think he's who we think he id

whit has been shown to struggle to hold in his laughter in the middle of a class trial about the murder of one of his classmates, which is definitely an inappropriate reaction, but the fact that he's holding back a laugh at an unintentional joke shows that he isn't forcing amusement in the complete wrong situation. charles seems used to it by now to be honest, but uhhh idk

he's also become a fan favourite, being paired alongside charles as a good ship dynamic. understandably, whit has become a lovable character, serving (slaying) as some form of comic relief. but his reactions seriously give me a weird feeling. even if he's masking his emotions, to do it to this level, in this situation, feels wrong to me. it might just be a personal feeling about him, i do think he's funny and i like whit, but cmon man that is THE MOST SUSPICIOUS MAN IVE EVER SEEN

for example:

whit appears nonchalant after the gruelling, emotional class trial that him and his classmates have sat through for hours? hours game time and real time, i believe. whit is so casual here, and it bothers me - he doesn't look tired at all, worn out, he doesn't even seem to CARE.

more of whit's apathy:

this is the most concern i remember whit showing until this point, and it's directed towards charles. and not their classmate who has just been shot and is, like, violently bleeding out.. it's a bit inappropriate? he doesn't express shock about levi's sacrifice, he just seems to be anxious for charles.

this makes me wonder if whit is maybe more detached than other characters? sure he acts as a comedic character, but is he doing this deliberately? it's not making the mood better, no matter how much he tries, he should've figured that out by now. how is he capable of just keeping a mostly straight face (or, well, happy face) throughout two whole class trials? and an execution (one one so far)

then, there's the first instance of something extreme from whit:

im not sure what to interpret this emotion as. i initially took it as whit being utterly shocked, taken aback, maybe he has claustrophobia? looking into it more i still don't know what to think. he might be hateful, or having some sort of flashback or whatever, but whatever it is it looks dangerous.

this is more emotion than he shows towards xander's death, min's execution, arei's death, levi's sacrifice. and it's towards a locked door. that's why he could have claustrophobia, maybe some that's trauma-related. this could be explored further in the upcoming chapters if we're lucky. :)

sorry if im going into too much detail!!! he's just sus to me at the moment!!! and i miss levi and i miss ace and i am a very very very sad person and i want them BACK!!!!!!!! anyway hope this was fun to read i guess idk maybe perhaps

[savi-our]

Revisiting an old chapter

Going through some of my older works and this is from my fic Right Next Door that's currently on hiatus. Im posting it bc jesus i actually cooked on this, idk what happened to me, was i posessed? How do i match up to this now???? Anyway its based on the Red being soft on a pretty little thing in a bar prompt i did so if you'd like give it a read - fair warning its like 6k words...

Red (UF Sans) x Reader, Grillby (UT) x Reader

The warm air ruffled your hair as you opened the heavy oak door to your favorite diner, the wear of today making your bones creak in protest as you slid slowly across the floor, beelining straight towards the familiar scent of sizzling meat and burnt pine. You slid into your usual seat, wood scraping against wood as you leaned onto the bar in a lazy, exhausted slump, the snowflakes stuck in your hair wafting off of you as you brushed them out of your hair and off of your clothes.

The evening chill hadn't even bothered you, or rather you opted to ignore it as your exhaustion took precedence, even still, the chill almost slid off you in waves as a familiar warmth greedily took you in its embrace. 

“...”

The familiar crackle of fire made the corners of your lips twitch upwards, you had laid on top of your hands, eyes resting as you waited patiently for this exact monster to warm your worn little heart.

“...”

He crackled and you snorted, assuming his awkwardness at you ignoring his approach. You lifted your head, gracing Grillby with your full attention as a tired but friendly smile lifted your face.

“Hey hot stuff.” You drawled lazily, fighting a yawn in between your little quip as his brow raised at your antics.

Huffing a laugh and willing yourself to straighten you turned to him, no matter how tempting it was to sunbathe in the fire elementals warmth like some stray cat fresh off the streets. Then again - you suppose that's exactly what you were. Amidst your musings you felt Grillby grow increasingly twitchy with your lackluster conversation and you should probably cut the guy some slack, he depended on you for the one sided friendly banter after all.

“Sorry sorry, I'm here.” You voiced absentmindedly, pulling a stray lock of hair out of your face as you gave him your actual full attention.

He crackled in response, sliding a menu over to you and you couldn't help but stare at it blankly for a second… god you should really get some sleep, especially since Grillby's eyes hadn’t left you even once through this whole encounter, in worry if you had to make a guess.

You met his eyes, squinting a bit at how bright he was but you noted that he was definitely worried, or perhaps curious, his fingers twitched as he looked over you.

“Like what you see?” you mused with a smirk, raising an eyebrow at him and you couldn't help but laugh as his flames sputtered, he leveled you with a glare and you subconsciously pulled away your hands as you felt the temperature rise.

“Is that a yes?” You wiggled your eyebrows at him in teasing, and he huffed , turning his eyes away from you - offended and flames crackling, you snickered at his reaction, an evil glint in your eye as you leaned in your barstool to try and meet his gaze and failing miserably.

“Oh c’mon Grillbs, don't go giving me the cold shoulder, i’ll cry.”

He leveled you with a look as you wiped a nonexistent, fake tear from your cheek and you let out a laugh as he pushed the menu towards you once again.

“Okay, okay uh…” You calmed, letting your eyes briskly fly over the menu before meeting his gaze again.

“Surprise me, whatevers fine.” you answered, pushing the menu back towards him, and he rose a fiery brow at you at your impish grin. 

“I'm serious, just give me whatever, I'm starving.” Grillby didn't move for a while before letting out a distorted little huff and moving back towards the kitchen, a loud pop and crackle in his wake. You huffed out a laugh at the sight but your attention was soon cut short, pulled towards the front door, the cool gust of wind making you shiver as you glanced towards it. A hulking form making its way towards you, the evening shadowing their features under the hood of their fur lined jacket, a glint of a golden fang caught your eye but you didn't dare stare. You turned back towards the bar, pulling out your phone to distract yourself as you waited eagerly for your food. 

You could feel the stranger approach, the floorboards creaking behind you with the heavy footsteps and an uneasy tenseness settled in your spine. It's unlikely that they would do anything, and although human and monster relations were still tense you had enough trust in Grillby to know that he would more than likely step up in your defense if any of the monsters decided they didnt want a human around, or so you hoped anyway.

It didn't mean it was wise to let your guard down anyway.

The stranger seemed to hesitate in his approach, a shadow cast over you as you pointedly scrolled through your phone, the hair on your neck stood up for the few seconds that he seemed to halt behind you, a looming presence in the diner dim. A grunt caught your attention before the presence retreated - moving further down the bar, slumping into one of the stools as he leaned onto the bar with a deep almost growl like grunt.

You chanced a glance at the stranger from the corner of your eye, watching as a skeletal hand pulled out from his pocket and moved to the fur lining of his hood, the snowflakes lodged in its strands falling, but before you could chance another look, the crackle of Grillby's flames brought you back to attention.

You eyed the fire elemental for a moment and he eyed you right back, gaze unreadable as he placed a plate of fries and a burger in front of you. You smiled, your tension easing off significantly as you looked back up at him, grateful.

“Thanks Grillby, looks great.” he hummed in response, nodding at you before moving further down towards the new arrival.

You ate in relative silence after that, not willing to chance a close call with how sluggish you had been, besides, the stranger didn't come in here to be stared at by some overly curious human.

…

Grillby's food had done wonders for your exhaustion, you almost wondered if he had toned up the magic with how much more energized you had been. Your muscles relaxed, and breathing had become that much easier, your eyes no longer lidded as you finished up the last of your fries. 

There were a couple more monsters that sought solace in the warming glow of the bar, some of them greeted you in their approach and you answered in kind. The diner wasn't even half full however, Sunday nights were rarely drinking nights but you couldn't help but crave something magical to finish off the night, the goings on of today had undeniably drained you. The loud and entitled woman, the lean, grim and prim monster and more importantly your down in the dumps coworker. You didn't complain though, some days were just like that - harder , more draining, it was life, and as much as you could whine and complain over how much it had worn you out, some people had it harder. 

You tended to think you were good at that, the comfort, the listening, the watching for signs - not only towards others but yourself as well. You took care to seek comforts in places of your own making, seek out warmth in the colder days, intuitively and almost instinctively you sought out the things that made life that much brighter. Why or how, you had no clue, it seemed natural to you, like taking a sip of water after being out in the sun all day, or a hot cup of coco in the cold winter nights.

You slid your plate to the side and picked up the menu again, knocking yourself out of your train of thought, huffing, looking if there were any new additions as you flipped through it. You couldn't help but feel like someone was watching you every now and again however, but whenever your gaze lifted to look around the feeling had gone away, it was… weird, to say the least.

A light crackle in front of you had snapped your attention up as you glanced at the bartender, squinting once more at the contrast.

“Hey Grillbz, you have anything new on here?” you asked, pointing to the menu as you asked. He answered you with a hum, his eyes moving towards the menu before turning towards the various shelves behind him, lined with bottles upon bottles of various liquids. Some you recognized, some you did not.

Grillby mulled over his thoughts before moving, seeming to make up his mind as he picked off various bottles and a jar or two from the shelves. It was always a treat to see Grillby work, his practiced hands mixing drinks expertly, it made your eyes glint and grin widen in excitement. 

You leaned slightly over the counter to look at him working, ignoring his amused huff before he moved to make your drink.

As he placed it onto the bar you took to examine it, a purple and orange liquid swirling in the glass, it bubbled inside of itself, the appearance of it reminded you of one of those lava lamps that used to be all the rage way back when - it certainly glowed like one.

“Okay, thats really fucking cool.” you grinned, glancing up at the monster like a child in a candy store. He seemed to let out a distorted chuckle, a low and sultry thing but soft, so very soft, it had your brows raising, you weren't sure if you had ever heard him laugh like that. A huff here and a cracklining there but not quite like this. The stutter in your pulse was embarassign if you were honest, but the warmth in his gaze did nothing for your nerves so you turned away, fighting a slight blush as you decided to occupy yourself with the drink, not noticing the slight raise in temperature as you turned away.

Picking up the glass, you examined a bit more critically before finally giving it a curious sip. You didn't expect the bitter tang as your brows furrowed, the subtle taste of orange and something you couldn't quite discern sliding over your tongue, humming in surprise at the slight sizzle that hit the back of your throat as your brows lifted, whatever it was - it was fairly strong. You waited for the inevitable effect of whatever magic Grillby had poured into it to hit, and slowly you felt the tips of your fingertips prickling.

“Whoa what's in this stuff?” You asked, lifting your eyes back towards the handsome bartender, suddenly noting just how mesmerizing the flames rolling up his body seemed. He had been idly polishing another glass, his gaze never leaving you as what you could only assume was his mouth lifted into a knowing smile. He pulled out a laminated sheet of paper from behind the bar, and as you glazed over it you noted that there were various descriptions of colors and the traits they represented.

Soul traits, or soul/magic traits you presumed and as you slid down the list a question formed on the tip of your tongue.

“Bravery and perseverance?” you questioned, looking back up at Grillby and he answered you with a nod, you lifted a brow at him.

“So the colors match the traits?” another nod.

You looked back towards your drink, not sure if you were quite understanding it correctly. 

“Soo- what, what does that mean exactly?” you blurted, turning back to the bartender as he crackled subconsciously.

“‘s just like your regular alcohol.” a gruff voice further down the bar made you turn, eyes landing on stark red, a strangely familiar shade. The stranger from before, it seemed, had decided to join in - a skeleton monster by the look of things, with a rough edge to his voice and a gruff look to his face…- skull? 

“Uh…” you took a second, turning more of your body to face him, suddenly the previous tension you had felt from him a mere memory. “How do you mean?” 

“makes you braver, and makes it last longer” He added, his gaze turning to slide down your body lazily, grin full of sharp teeth lifting, seemingly liking what he sees. Your brow rose, noting the gesture. “Right, well that's a bit boring.” You blurted, only catching yourself a second later.

The startled look you shot Grillby would have been funny if your heart hadn't dropped in your chest. “Not that it was bad! Honestly I really liked the taste and-” A gruff laugh made you turn back towards the skeleton with an incredulous stare as he seemed to take amusement in your effort to smooth over the slight. Your eyes narrowed at him and you couldn't help the huff as he shot you a wink. 

“‘s fine doll, grillbz can take the heat ” you blinked at him, noting the huff Grillby let out next to you.

“I mean yeah, just look at him, he's smokin’.” you blurted before even really thinking about it, your eyes widened. The sharp guffaw pulled you from your shock as you looked back at the stranger.

“stars sweetheart, you don't mince any words do ya.” You grimaced at the comment, chancing a look at Grillby who seemed to be pointedly looking away from you, polishing a glass that really doesn't need to be polished any more than it was - what was up with that actually?

“got the hots for him huh?” you raised a brow, shooting the skeleton a quick glance and noted his shit eating smirk before you found yourself actually mirroring it. As you turned back to Grillby you pointed a look his way.

“...Well I’d offer to stop, drop and roll with him but it might be too hot to candle ” 

Grillby lets out what almost could be considered a groan, a distorted and crackling sound as he turns to you exasperated, the gesture muffled in its intent by the gruff chortle ringing only two seats down from you and it makes your smile widen, brows wiggling at Grillby as the temperature picks up enough for you to finally notice. 

“Whoa hot stuff sorry, sorry, you don't need to bring on the heat.”

The bartender crackled at your delivery, lifting an arm up to his face as he shook his head, you barely noticed as the skeleton moved seats, sliding into the barstool next to you and the loom and doom of his shadow once again prickled at your neck, a subconscious shiver running up your spine.

“careful doll, keep going and he might light a fire under your ass” the stranger grinned at you, his grin sharp as he lifted a glass of… something up to his mouth.You took note of the sudden closeness, but oddly you didn't quite mind it, even as the goosebumps on your arm prickled at your skin, the guy seemed like good fun, even if you were dwarfed by the sheer size of him.

“Aw Grillbz would never do that -  would you?” you asked, your tone playful as the fire monster leveled you with another look. You took another sip of your drink, turning your eyes away from the heated gaze before throwing up your arms in surrender.

“Alright alright, I got it.” you gave Grillby a placating look but as he stared at you and as the low thrum of magic hit the back of your throat once again your fragile little facade cracked, a slow smirk overtaking your features.

“I flame to please, after all.” The disgruntled sigh that leaves the bartender only fuels both you and the strangers amusement, and as you turn to the skeleton with a wide grin you can practically feel him laughing, his grin matching yours with a glint to his eyes, his arm landing around your shoulders making you let out a little ‘oof’ as he chortles - much to the dismay of the fire elemental.

“You like that do you?” you ask the monster at your side, giving him an amused once over as he turns to you, a deep red sparkle in his eyes and a sharp glint to his golden tooth.

“what can i say, i lava good fire pun, but you're more than sparkin’ my interest dollface.” he winks, a flirty tilt to his tone which was a sharp contrast to the distorted groan from Grillby, much to his delight however, a group of bunny monsters entered the bar and he gladly took his exit, leaving you with your newfound friend. Or at least you hope he was friendly, all things considered.

“Tickled your funny bone did I?” you smirked back at him, a playful glint in your eye as his grin widened.

“one of em sure” he responded and you snorted.

“Oh yeah? Which one?” you asked with raised brows glancing down and back up pointedly, leaning in slightly as you felt the weight of his arm on your shoulders shifting. For a guy made entirely of bone he seemed pretty big, heavy, if his gaze was anything to go by.

“stars ya aint shy either are ya kitten” his voice lifted as he kept his eyes locked on you, squeezing your shoulders which made you shift your weight closer to him, whether it was on purpose or not, you didn't know.

“Yeah well, neither are you, fangs.” You quipped, taking another sip of your drink, careful to pace yourself in the midst of your new companion. The skeleton seemed friendly, very friendly if his roaming eyes and sharp grin were anything to go by, and whilst you enjoyed the attention more now that you had a bit of liquid courage, you didn't plan on bringing anyone home tonight, especially not someone who you've known for barely a few minutes.

“fangs?” he questioned, making you turn your eyes back to him, leaning back in your stool.

“I'd call you by your name if you gave me one.” he hummed, finishing off his own drink, 

“‘names red, but you can call me anything you'd like dollface” he winked, feeling a squeeze on your shoulder before he moved his hand away, an easy and sharp grin on his face, a look almost signature to him or so it seemed.

“Oh yeah? Anything at all?” the glint in your eye was downright evil as he shot you a dirty look, Red turned slightly and it was then that you fully took notice of his appearance. A blood red collar with golden studs sat right below his chin clasped tightly around a matching thick, red turtleneck. He was sporting some shorts, odd for the weather and seemingly completely throwing the point of his jacket, but you weren't one to question it, especially not as he leaned in, a dangerous, sharklike smirk pulling on his features as he stopped just short of your face. You were sure he felt the stutter in your breath on his teeth, a thought that made you gulp, your eyes wide as they stared up at two glowing red ones.

“anythin at all dollface, so long as i get ta return the favor.” his voice was low, low , a deep grumble that made your insides almost vibrate in tandem. You couldn't help but stare at him, like some sort of deer in headlights, struggling to fight a flush from your face and he noticed, his grin widening, knowing .

The sudden knock on wood made you snap back to reality, eyes shooting back towards the bar and were met with Grillby's stare, it wasn't one you could read given the situation, and for some reason you didn't really want to right now. The barman had placed a new drink next to Red, something yellow in a short glass that you couldn't make out. 

The skeleton grunted, whether it was due to your retreat, the sudden intrusion or in thanks for the drink you couldn't tell. You took a good long sip of your own drink, finishing it off - you felt like you needed it after whatever that was.

You could feel Grillby's own gaze directed at you, but you didnt turn to meet it, pushing your glass over to him lightly and after a second or two he took it from you, your hand twitching as his flames brushed over your fingertips. You knew Grillby's fire was not like regular old fire, he seemed to regulate his temperature with a practiced ease at his own convenience, but survival instincts were no joke - you noted for the second time today, so no matter what your brain told you, your nervous system reminded you that fire equals bad, a reflex you couldn't help but feel bad about. You looked up at him, his expression still unreadable as he placed your glass with the rest of the dirty ones, due for a wash later or so you assumed.

You glanced back at the menu still sitting nearby in an attempt to distract your skittering thoughts, trying to decide whether or not you wanted another boost of liquid courage. You weren't a lightweight by any means but a pleasant buzz seemed to settle your nerves already and as you glanced over the menu you weighed your options. Magic drinks were strong, even the ones light on magic, something about how humans and monsters took to it differently, it seemed all the monster drinks were strong for humans, and from what you knew all of the humans regular drinks were strong for monsters - some weird physiological thing apparently.

“what ya gettin?” Red pulled you from your thoughts, making you glance up at him, your embarrassment drowning in the light of your buzz. “Not sure…” you muttered, pulling your eyes away from him and back to the menu undecided. You hummed but soon lifted your eyes back to the skeleton, shooting the drink in his hand a curious look.

“What did you get?” curiosity peaked, especially considering how his smirk stretched. Red pushed the glass your way, a brow bone raised.

You gave him a skeptical look, eyes squinting as you eyed the glass, glancing towards Grillby for a second before throwing caution to the wind. That bravery/perseverance thing was really no joke.

You lifted the glass up to your nose, giving it a cautionary sniff which made Reds grin only widen before taking a sip, it was then you realized that a mistake was made somewhere along the way. Your face must have been real funny, considering how much of a laugh Red had gotten out of it. Your nose scrunched in a grimace as the taste hit your tongue, just barely keeping yourself from gagging.

“Christ is that mustard ?” you groaned out, still cringing back from the taste as you set the cup promptly down, pushing it right back into Reds hands.

“stars sweetheart you shoulda seen your face” he chortled, lifting up a hand to rub away a tear, his shoulders still shaking in amusement. You turned to Grillby, an incredulous look on your face. You found that the barman had seemed amused by your reaction, he lifted a knuckle to his mouth, keeping himself from laughing in a crackle.

“That stings, fucking hell, what else is in that, rum?!” you asked in an outrage, making Red shoot you an approving look.

“you have good nose kitten, ‘ts a screwdriver” 

“That is anything but a screwdriver” You disagreed, tickling his hypothetical funny bone even more if the chuckle was anything to go by. Red shrugged, picking up the glass and downing it in one and you cringed at the sight. “anythin’s a screwdriver if you want it to be” he shrugged, his everlasting grin on his face.

“That is not how that works.” you disagree, shooting him a look. “Why mustard? Why not literally anything else?” He shrugged again, handing over his glass to Grillby for a refill.

“jus’ like it” he grunted in thanks as you watched in abject horror as Grillby mixed his drink and slid it across the bar.

…

Time passed easily in Reds and Grillbys company, conversation flowed freely as both you and Red made it a pointed effort to torment the fire elemental at every opportunity, trading flame related puns and pick up lines at your own discretion. It had been a surprise how easily Red had joined in your shenanigans, his laugh hearty as a particularly dirty one liner slid past your lips, one that made your knuckles sting as the heat picked up, the barman sounding his disapproval in the only way he knew how. 

Even so he didn't deny you your fun, refilling your drink for the third time tonight, something light so you could still keep your wits about you - a wise decision considering the downright dirty look Red shot you moments prior. Red seemed rather charming, in an odd - gruff and mean sort of way, his pickup lines aimed more at you rather than Grillby, but you couldn't help but enjoy them, the attention flattering and one liners witty, despite the growing slur to his words. 

It was half past two in the morning when you finished your drink, a number that made you blanch once you had checked your phone. It was late, much later than you had intended, especially considering the early morning classes you were expected to attend. You grunted, pocketing your phone as you pushed your now empty glass away, expression souring. 

“everything' alright dollface?” Red quipped at your side, words lazy as they slipped past his teeth and you turned to him, noting how he was leaning more of his weight onto the bar. Now that you thought to yourself, the skeleton had been throwing back drink after drink, his glass empty in two long chugs. How many of those had he actually had? Whatever the number it concerned you, especially considering the fact he had indulged in a human specialty.

“Yeah, I'm more worried about you to be honest.” His brow raised at your words, and a rolling hum sounded from deep within his chest.

“oh yeah?” 

“Yeah, you look just about ready to call it a night.” You leveled him with a look, noting his snort, pawing at the glass sat in front of him.

“i’d rather call you t’night” his flirty comment lazy, probably due to the influence. Despite his claims to be ‘jus’ fine dollface’ you hadn't believed him. It was conflicting - on one hand he was a big boy, perfectly capable of making his own decisions, he certainly wouldn't be in danger even if you left him there, not under Grillby's watchful eye and considering the air of sharp magic wafting off him - you hardly thought anyone would bother him. On the other hand he looked positively sloshed, even you could tell in your haze. 

A sigh escaped you, feeling yourself sobering slightly. It wasn't really your problem, he was just some guy with a knack for one liners that had made your evening, but you could at least call him a cab - or something.

“Okay big guy if you say so, I probably should be heading off though.” You patted his back and he gave you a soft grunt in response, you glanced at Grillby to note that he was already calculating your tab, only to be interrupted by Red as he stopped the barman in his tracks.

“put those on me will ya’?” He slurred and you shot him a look.

“You don't have to do that Red-”

“don’t worry about it sweetcheeks, t’s my treat.” Red lifted, his weight shifting, lazily he straightened and it's only then that you managed to gauge his full height. He was only about two heads taller than you but you still felt downright dwarfed as he shot a look down at you, his grin easy.

“why dontcha lemme walk ya home as thanks” Oh this seemed like a loaded question if you've ever heard one, his expression betrayed him, his grin wide and eyes lidded. You hummed and gave him a skeptical onceover.

“ Just walk me home?” 

“unless ya have anythin else in mind…” he hummed, and it took everything in you to stop the shiver that threatened to roll down your spine at the intensity in his pointed gaze. You hummed in response, teeth catching lip as you squinted up at him in amusement.

“Can't say that I do…” you trailed off, your knowing smile betraying your little lie, Red shot you a look that told you he had caught on, but he didnt point it out, instead he shrugged as he turned towards the front door, lifting a hand to your lower back in encouragement to keep in step with him.

“c’mon dollface, ‘ts dark out, don't want me to worry do ya?” He quipped and you hummed in return. You had to admit, walking through the city in the dark early hours all by yourself was less than appealing, and even though you didn't know if showing Red where you had lived was a good idea, something told you that he wouldn't push even if you told him no - then again that might be the alcohol talking.

“Okay fine.” you relented with a light air to your tone. You turned back to Grillby, exchanging your goodbyes before heading off into the night with Red.

The night air was freezing and you couldn't help the full body shiver at the contrast, your breath showing as you muttered a quiet curse under it, Red lifted his arm around your shoulders and drew you towards him, a gesture that made you tense slightly but unable to resist the subtle warmth of his jacket, you let him pull you along.

Red engaged you in light conversation as you walked, throwing general and silly questions your way like your favorite color or favorite season - all of them tinged in a playful and flirty subtext but as you indulged his curiosities you began to realize that most of them had no real heat to it. It seemed friendly, rather than anything else and slowly you felt yourself relaxing in his casual hold. It was… nice, he was being nice, and as the revelation hit you you realized that his once loaded question of walking you home seemed genuine. Perhaps you had misjudged him, the thought heavy on your mind but you could hardly be blamed for it - when a monster like Red pulls you into the night, it's only reasonable to keep your guard up, you don't think you could do much if he were more criminally inclined after all. You barely knew him, a fact that you wanted to rectify now that you knew he meant you no real harm.

As you approached the beat down apartment building you knew to be your home, you laughed at one of Red's shitty little pickup lines, his eyes glinting at you as you turned towards the front door - it was then that you felt him pull away and stop in his tracks.

“uh doll?” he voiced, making you turn to him in question.

“Yeah?”

“what’cha.. uh wat’cha doing?” you watched him shift on his feet, old sneakers scraping the fresh snow on the concrete, his expression serious, if not almost suspicious.

“Going home?” You asked him, tone unsure.

“you… you live here ?” he questioned again and you weren't quite sure if you liked where this was going, cautious of the shift in his tone.

“Uh.. yeah?” 

He stared at you for a while, gooseflesh prickling as you felt him almost look through you before a hum rumbled from his chest.

“Everything uh… everything okay?” You questioned again, and he hummed again, stoic, before he moved to your side and pushed open the door for you, motioning a go ahead. This was odd, very odd, you didn't like it.

“jus fine dollface, lemme walk ya to your door” he motioned and you abided despite yourself, still on edge but willing to give him some benefit of the doubt. You hoped you weren't making a huge mistake.

As you walked into the stairway you pointedly avoided the elevator, there was no way in hell you were going to cram yourself into a closed tiny space with Red when he was setting off your alarm bells, and as you climbed floor after floor you felt the hair on the back of your neck stand to attention as you felt his eyes on you, you didn't like it, especially after hearing him mutter something along the lines of ‘no way..’ and ‘lucky’ from behind you, your senses on edge and stomach falling.

You didn't like this.

As you reached the fifth floor and opened the door to the apartments you were just about ready to make a run for your apartment - maybe you should? 

You jumped as you heard a loud snort behind you, and warily you turned a cautious look behind you to see Red looking… amused? 

“Okay Red you are starting to really creep me out here.” You admitted and he laughed as you stared at him in a wide, confused and worried stupor, he waved a hand in a dismissive gesture as the look on his face turned relaxed.

“my bad doll, but uh, ya live here?” He questioned again and your brow rose.

“Yeah?” You glanced at your apartment door, moving to stand in front of it, still contemplating just bolting.

“well ain't that a treat.” he huffed, his tone still amused as he moved past you, you picked up a jingle in his pocket as he stopped two doors down.

“Huh?” 

He lifted a glinting set of keys out of his jacket, jingling them your way with a knowing look. You stared at him in confusion before he snorted and lifted the key up to the door and…unlocked it.

“Okay hold on a second…” You stopped him in his tracks as he shot you a raised eyebrow.

“We’re-”

“neighbors.” 

…

“No fucking way.” 

Reds snort echoed through the hallway at the disbelief on your face, his laugh returning to him as you just stared. Of course he was your neighbor, he was a skeleton! It made so much fucking sense you cursed yourself for not realizing it sooner. You had never seen a skeleton monster in town before, your first time seeing one was Papyrus - his family moved in next door, how had you missed that? It was almost obvious, but what the hell?

“Why didn't you just tell me?! You almost gave me a heart attack, jesus…” You whined, lifting a hand to your chest as relief finally flooded through you, Reds hearty laugh didn't help matters.

“you didn't ask” he quipped and you shot him a dirty look, nose scrunching which only made his grin widen.

“You're horrible.”

“ya’ don't mean that doll.” 

You crossed your arms at him as he shot you a knowing look, his grin smug as you shot him a little pout.

“c’mon don't give me that dollface.” He prodded and you sighed in response. “Fine.” you huffed and his expression lightened, still tinged in that smugness of his.

“ ‘ts gettin late” he reminded you and shot you a guiding look towards your apartment door, one you mirrored as you sighed.

“Yeah it is… I should go.” He hummed at you, turning to fling open his own door as you pulled out your keys.

“g’night dollface.”

“Goodnight Red.” you huffed as you opened the door, giving him a parting look before finally making your escape into the comforting warmth of your apartment. Locking the door you let your shoulders droop - it had been a long day and despite the multiple scares throughout the evening you couldn't help but feel… content, in an odd, weird way.

It seems like things were changing, living in this shitty little apartment becoming akin to a rollercoaster ride, but perhaps that wasn't such a bad thing, perhaps you'd enjoy it more than you were willing to admit. Whatever the case, it was time for bed, and as you took to your late evening routine you couldn't help the smile playing on your lips.

[miguel-owhora]

please do, come join us PLEASE. i love this au so much it's so fun like genuinely.

but!!!!!! idk how designs work but :3 For the most part, they all look like their game designs, obviously. im only gonna do Micah n Arthur for now, since they're the main characters of this AU, but i might do other characters later on.

Micah still looks the same, same hair and same facial hair, and same body shape. His hair only gets greasy when he forgets to shower, but otherwise it's pretty soft and healthy, and whenever he wears a cap, he pulls it into a short ponytail. He still has the same staring problem and same heavy bags under his eyes. I like to think he wears glasses, but sometimes he just doesn't, so it's 50/50 if he'll wear them. He will, however, wear them around Arthur because he once called him 'handsome' when he was wearing them and it did wonders to his ego.

He generally wears comfortable clothing, both online and in person. Sweatshirts, worn out and well used, often colored in a washed out red color, and sweats (off whites or grays) are also common. Half of the time he wears flip flops with white socks that are in desperate need of some throwing away. He has a couple of hair ties he has on his wrists at all time for either 1. his hair, or 2. to play around with. I think he'd be a big fan of energy drinks, or straight up alcohol whenever he needs a quick booster.

However, I do think Micah does know how to dress himself if he needs to go to some fancy event. Let's not forget he comes from a line of lawyers, and I imagine his daddy drilled into his sons on how to properly dress themselves because "no son of mine will dress like a slob." So he definitely knows where to get suits and has tailors phone numbers written down, so when he's needed at some event that requires proper clothes, he comes in looking well-groomed. He probably carries Arthur around like some arm candy.

Speaking of Arthur, he still pretty much looks the same as he does in the same. I think everyone in college looks a bit younger, but still the same appearance as they do in the game, if that makes sense. Anyways, he still has the same hair cut but his beard is more trimmed, more of a stubble really. He has an almost soft and quiet vibe to him, as in he's a chill guy who looks kinda grumpy lmao. Blue is still his favorite color, he probably also wears sweatshirts like Micah, but wears jeans instead of sweats. When he is at home, he definitely mostly wears shorts, and also wears sandals with socks, like Micah. Probably wears some sort of cap with either some stupid fish joke on it, or a little deer. He always has a tired look on him, because he's almost always tired of dealing with everyone's shenanigans when he just wants to sit down somewhere and draw something.

He probably has some hair ties on his wrists, too, because he happens to know a lot of people with long hair. Anyways, I don't think he's really that deep into his family's shady business. While his dads were a little confused when he chose to study art, they were actually pretty supportive and fund his tuition. Well, more so Hosea than Dutch, because Dutch had been expecting him to follow in their footsteps. Still, he does drill some law facts into Arthur's brain.

Anyways, that being said, since Arthur isn't that deep into the family business, he doesn't really attend any fancy events. That's more of John's job, who does end up following in the lawyer path. But, considering Micah eventually does work his way into Dutch's good graces - which leads to a semi-friendly rivalry between John n him (which could be a nod towards the events of RDR) - Micah gets a higher position and rank within the company, he's forced to attend several events, which he despises. But he does deal with it, and gets cocky and in a pleasant mood whenever Arthur joins him, mostly as his arm candy.

Whenever he does attend these events, Arthur wears a basic and simple suit. Of course, considering he comes from a wealthy family and his sweetheart does have money, it's simple but of high quality, tailored to fit him. And goodness gracious, does it really emphasize his beauty.

[a-scary-lack-of-common-sense]

hi! this is the same anon who asked about the writing thing but--since they all had switched classes, is how you tagged/call them what they refer to each other as? (so like everyone refers to them as mediscout, engimed, demo-spy, etc.) or do they just refer to them as their new classes (so referring to the mediscout purely as Medic?) obviously they call solly spyder (which i think is so cute and very fun :>) but im curious about the others! so i guess this goes into the territory of: are there any nicknames they all call each other--or at least ones you think stand out?

Hello hello! First of all, thank you so much for asking so many questions and allowing me to talk about my AU to you all, I really appreciate that you guys are enjoying this as much as I am! <3

Second of all, I'm so sorry this took so long to answer!! I have seen your other ask concerning the writing for my AU, and I have to tell you beforehand that it's okay if you lost motivation or inspiration to write this during the long wait. I totally understand if you don’t feel like doing this anymore. Please don't force yourself to write for something you lost interest in. But I’ll gladly still infodump you about the AU!

Names:

Sure, if you wanted to you could just call them their job names. It would make it easier for the readers to recognize each character, but I do have some actual names I came up with if you prefer something more natural sounding!

All the job switched mercs chose their own names, but I deliberately made the names they chose sound as close as possible to the OG Red mercs'. Because the irony here is that they are clones who try so desperately to be unique and different from the OG team, but still managed to somehow copy them despite all their efforts not to.

But I'm really shit at naming things so the effect was kinda lost :')

Sniper as Soldier- Monday or Mondy

Reason: When asked about his name choice, he paused for a moment and asked back, "what day is it today?"

"Monday."

"Monday it is, then."

Soldier as Spy- June or Spyder

Scout as Medic- Germs (short for germinoma) (yeah idk what happened with this one but I didn't wanna call him Jerry either)

Reason: June chose the wrong day to ask Germs about name choices. When asked, the battle worn, tired, salty field-medic grabbed a random medical book from his bookshelf; opened the book; flipped to a random page; viciously stabbed his finger on a random spot on the page and read the word under his finger: "germinoma"- all the while maintaining direct eye contact. It was supposed to be sarcastic. June took it literally, so it became his permanent nickname (much to his dismay)

Medic as Engineer- Ludovic (sometimes they call him Ludo, for short)

Spy as Demoman- Louise, Lois, Lassie, Louisiana, Lyse (any name similar sounding enough to Lois works)

Reason: His "boom sticks" are modified versions of an actual French cigarette brand called "Gauloises". Since none of the mercs actually knows how to read French, they severely butchered the pronunciation and ended up just dropping the beginning of the word entirely, sticking with "loises". However, everyone had varying interpretations of how to pronounce THAT too. So his exact name remains a mystery, and he won't clarify either (he finds it fun to see them try and guess).

Demoman as Sniper- Trevis

Heavy as Pyro- Mikel

Engineer as Heavy- Belle

Pyro as Scout- Zippo

Reason: ya know... zippo lighters... and he's a scout now, so he ZIPS past you... get it?

These are all very bad names, I know, but hopefully you can tolerate my utterly abysmal naming skills :')

Nicknames:

- Monday sometimes calls Lois "Goldilocks" as his own godawful pronounciation of "Gauloises". It annoys Lois to no ends and Mondy loves it.

- He also sometimes calls Germs "bun-bun" to piss him off about his buck teeth. He feels too bad to joke about Belle's tho.

- Monday uses the most nicknames with others, 90% of which is to mock or annoy but it's all in good fun (usually)

- THEY'RE ALWAYS THE SILLIEST NICKNAMES TOO, WITH EVEN SILLER STORIES BEHIND THEM. Just think of the dumbest, goofiest, sounding names

- He once honest to God called Mikel "Jason" and did NOT elaborate

- Germs rivals Monday with his own silly nicknames for everyone, but his tend to be a bit more... vulgar

- "HEY FUCKNUGGETS"

- "fly high, chucklefest junior!"

- "calm down Colonel shrinky-dink"

Okay, that's it for now. love you, bye bye, I'll see u again in another ask!

[torialefay]

Feel free to delete, and please take this with a grain of salt bc its just an outsider view that could be horribly wrong, but ive noticed that felix looks so tired and out of it lately. The only times i feel like his smile is genuine is on stage at concerts (not counting music bank and the like) and sometimes when his members says something he finds funny, otherwise, he just looks so *tired* in most pictures, interview, etc ive seen put out recently (idk if im delulu, probably am tbh, but i get a sense of annoyance/frustration from him at times too, but its veerry subtle)

no, i think you are 100% valid in this tbh. i mean i'd say all the boys are fucking exhausted these days with the comeback & all that they're doing, but i agree, felix seems kinda worn down.

i know i had mentioned it in the comments of one of my last posts, but the video of felix almost collapsing on stage from a couple of days ago paired with the messages he'd sent on bubble... my heart breaks for him honestly.

i can't imagine how hard it must be to be in the spotlight like that, but he's not even in the spotlight like most idols are... people expect the absolute MOST of him. like imagine being known as the biggest fucking visual in the industry (and i mean this in an objective way, like he's been the "it boy" for a longggg time). having that label put on you PLUS representing a well-known fashion brand & having a ton of sponsorships... it's a lot.

stray kids have worked extremely hard to get to where they are & definitely each have their own talents and strengths. but we have to be honest here... felix's visuals are what sells skz to a lottttt of people. you hear all the time about how people are so drawn to him & his looks, it's honestly crazy.

i wonder how anyone could not develop complexes about themselves when so much of their livelihood simply comes from being beautiful. and beauty is something you have to maintain. i'm sure he has to constantly think about his looks and how he will be perceived by others... especially now that he's (a tiny bit) pushing the "androgeny" concept. as thin as male idols are expected to be, female idols are expected to be even thinner. for him to maintain this androgenous look, it's possible that he feels like he has to realllly push this thin frame so that he can morphe himself to fit different concepts... i mean at this point, it's badically expected of him.

i agree that he seems tired & maybe a bit unlike the usual "sunshine lixie" that we see. i hope that whatever he is going through, that he will be able to find the love and support that he needs. whether that is through stay or through the people he is close to. there's so much more to that kind of life than what most people realize :(

[xaytried]

Dan Heng x Depressed Reader

self-Indulgent idk what im doing bro. first fanfic ever??

not proofread!! 1.4k words

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: .☽ . :☆ﾟ. ───

The day you had begun as it usually does. Being woken up by your cat at 6 in the morning, even though you had gone to bed at 3 am. You should have learned your lesson by now. Why do you still choose to go to bed so late, knowing damn well your cat would wake you up with the sun. 

It was hopeless trying to go back to sleep after getting up to feed the cat, so it might as well be productive right?

Your idea of productivity was different from others. For most people that meant maybe checking their email or cleaning up a little. For you though, it meant feeding yourself and taking your medication. Things most people don't think twice about, but the hardest part of your day. Your boyfriend knew this. He usually got up around 6, not because of the cat. He’s always been a productive and curious man. He gets up early and takes care of himself without any issues. That's not to say that he doesn't have his problems, but even he can admit that he doesn't have it nearly as difficult as you do. 

You get up and don’t even bother getting dressed, it was impressive enough that you even got up in the first place. It’s just another extra chore. You’re not going anywhere today anyway. The only thing you have today is online, and surely your psychiatrist won’t be able to tell you don't have pants on while on the video call. 

You make your way downstairs and on arrival, your lovely boyfriend, Dan Heng, greets you with a gentle smile, as he does every morning. 

“Good morning, darling.” He looks at your exhausted expression, a little worried that you look so worn out despite having just woken up. But he knows how awful your sleep schedule is. You honestly don't know why he still even wastes his worries on you.

“Good morning.” You reply.

You make your way across the living you into the kitchen. The medication you take requires food before you can take it. Supposedly you'd get sick if you missed this vital step, but you have never risked it. The last thing you wanted was to puke all your expensive medication down the toilet. Unfortunately though, you never really found anything appetizing, not ever. 

“I made you a breakfast taco, it should be in the fridge.” Dan Heng's voice startled you.

“Oh, okay… Thanks.” You make your way over to the refrigerator.

Dan Heng watches you. He watches through concerned eyes. It makes him sad that you always seem to wake up feeling absolutely nothing. No motivation or anything. And it's not like your sad or anything like that. It just hurts his hurt seeing you suffer. 

Ever since you first met him you've been very open to him about your depression, but once he moved in with you it's been more apparent. It's just not fair. It's not fair that a beautiful and kind-hearted individual such as yourself struggled so fiercely to function. You never had energy, you were always tired and your body constantly ached. 

He watches you take your pills every morning. This has got to be the fifth anti-depressant you've tried and it makes his heart ache to see you get absolutely no relief. It's like you're immune to everything you try. All he can do is be here for you, but he wishes so deeply that he could do more.

You slowly eat your breakfast and take your pills, standing in the kitchen for about 5 extra minutes just to stare at the remaining water in your glass. When you were little you used to always drink chocolate milk with your breakfast. That was too much effort now. You zone out, staring at your water, thinking about how much things have changed.

Your mother used to call you a “ray of sunshine”, her “sweet baby”. You never lost that kindness from your mother but it seems you certainly lost yourself. These are things that only Dan Heng can see in you now though. And no matter how hard you tried you could never see it in yourself. If it was the middle of the night and the sun wasn’t awake to mock you, this certainly is something that would make you tear up. But you physically couldn't cry right now. 

Your thoughts are interrupted by your boyfriend's arms wrapping around your waist.

“You okay?” He asks, chin pressing against your shoulder as he speaks. 

“Yeah.” You reply. Which is the truth. Nothing is ever exactly wrong, it's just never right. This is just how things always are. The cause of your depression was a chemical imbalance, there was nothing that could be fixed. So overall you’d say you’re pretty okay.

“Are you sure?” He lets out a breathy laugh. “You’ve been staring at that water for quite a while.”

You give him a soft smile. It’s not often your serious boyfriend lets out a laugh, but it seems even he knows the power his joy has over you. Coming over here and letting out a laugh into your ear, it’s enough to help you push forward for today.

You turn around, now facing Dan Heng, his hands now resting on your hips while you lean against the counter. Before you started dating him you would never have guessed how important physical touch was for him, he had always been so distant, wanting nothing more than to lock himself in another room and isolate himself for hours. 

Dan Heng certainly preferred to be alone, but ever since he met you he realized her much more enjoys being alone with you. Moments like this, when the world is still and it’s just the two of you, with some peace and quiet. That’s what he lives for. 

You were tempted to speak but then Dan Heng let out a sigh and rested his head on your shoulder. You let your concern show by moving your hand to his back, but you knew that if he wanted to talk he would. Perhaps right now all he needed was some quiet.

After a minute or two of silently rubbing Dan Heng’s back, he spoke. “You know you can talk to me right?”

You have nothing to talk about.

“I love you, I would love to listen, I would love to support you.”

“You’re already my biggest supporter.” You let out a giggle, hoping it would soften the mood a little more. 

“I want to help.” He’s more serious than ever.

“You do help, baby. More than you’ll ever know.” Your comforting words also help to comfort you. It was true. Even before you started dating Dan Heng had been your best friend and biggest supporter. Honestly, without him, you don’t even know if you’d still be here. But you don’t tell him that. He doesn’t need to know that you ever think of not being here. 

He stands straight up again to brush his hand across your cheek and that's when you can see it. His tears. There aren't many but he is without a doubt crying.

“Hey, what's wrong?” You ask him, no longer leaning against to counter, hands cupping his face, deep concern wavering in your voice.

“Y/N, you’re the most loving, kind, most perfect soul I’ve ever met, so why is the world doing you so wrong? You deserve to wake up every day full of excitement, full of energy, ready to take on the day. You deserve to smile, to laugh, genuine ones. Genuine smiles and genuine laughs.” Your eyes start to water, you continue to hold onto his face as tears roll down his cheeks and onto your fingers. “You deserve to be happy, Y/N. It’s not fair. You do so much good for so many people, for me. You make me smile, you make me happy, you make me feel alive. I don’t feel like I need to run anymore because I have you. So why must the world put you through so much pain?”

You had never seen him like this. 

“Shhhh…” you hush him and he looks at you, no longer breaking eye contact to speak. “I’m happier than I’ve ever been because of you Dan Heng,” you promise him. “I finally feel loved.”

After a moment of looking at you, he kisses you. Its soft and warm, a kiss to tell you that he’s not going anywhere and that he’ll be with you forever. 

With him… you’ll get through this.

[credulouscanidae]

not to sound like an influencer doing a sponsorship but man....hello/fresh has saved my life the last month

ive been giving it a go, and while the novelty has worn off a bit and im still battling some degree of executive dysfunction with cooking...i cannot even BEGIN to explain just how much it's helping me right now

i think the reason it works so well for me personally is that it eliminates every single hurdle i face when cooking. i get really overwhelmed at buying ingredients that may need to be used more than once (sauces, flavours etc) cuz i cant...plan out what meals i could use them for before they expire/perish.

also the idea of measuring things out, doing a lot of prep work and knowing exactly what to do adds to those little head blocks and it piles up to a feeling of impossibility etc.i waste so much money on perishables that expire and it's :/

so having pre-portioned ingredients, everything you have is what you need, has honestly given a spark back into cooking for me.

and i feel silly that i need this right now, cuz i should "just be able to cook" because i CAN cook. but the reality is that my depression and neurodivergence is quite uhhhhh life impacting at the moment. and ive gained so much weight, felt physically unhealthy/tired etc because i was at a stage where i could eat frozen pizzas and chips+pie or 2 min noodles every night. i started to crave fresh veggies and salads so badly, but i never bought them cuz they kept going off and theyre also very expensive ingredients for what they give me. same goes for flavours, where it can cost a lot for a bottle when you dont know if youre gonna finish it in time or like it etc, so you are less motivated to experiment with new flavours

this has been years and years of trying to eat better more consistently, and it seems that HF is finally something that is actually working for me.

a downside is that sometimes the cooking method is a bit inaccurate, but i also luckily have enough cooking skill to recognise and adapt it, so a lot of the cons to it hasnt been a dealbreaker for me yet.

again, ive probably just been riding some kinda high and man. i still feel extremely mentally ill lol, but i can feel the difference that a month of eating better has done for me. ive lost weight, have more energy, saved money (the meals are for 2 people so i get leftovers or 2 nights worth of food) and yeah....

i know this all sounds silly but even if it didnt save much money, i would pay that adhd tax because it's honestly changed my life for the better. not to mention ive also felt inspired to cook and i get to try new flavours which has also been cool! im not eating the same crap every night anymore.

just thought id...idk post some positivity for a change aaaaa