#and not just one member who solely uses these kinds of instruments

[elysianasterism]

just tweeted this but like. if you told past lucie, even lucie from last year, that they'd get obsessed with a pop band, they wouldn't believe you. but here we are 🕺

[tessenpai]

Kono Oto Tomare Chapter 128 Scans and Rough TL

Disclaimer: Please DO NOT use this translation to make your own TL of the chapter!! The KOT TL group works very hard to give you the most accurate translation, that does as much justice to the original script as possible. This is a ROUGH translation. That means is faulty and there must be mistakes in certain places. This is just for impatient people like myself to get a grasp on what is going on in the chapter! You can REFERENCE my TL if you want to discuss the chapter but never USE it as it was your own.

Scans: https://klz9.com/jxsh-kono-oto-tomare-raw-chapter-128.html

Page 1

Sign: Judge's Waiting Room.

Side Text: It's Tokise's turn. The competition's second day begins...

Chapter Title: #128 Dull Footsteps

Judge Tatsumi: !

Judge Tatsumi: Agata-sensei, Kurokawa-sensei. Good morning. You are both early, I see.

Page 2

Judge Agata: No, we just arrived ourselves.

Judge Tatsumi: Did you get enough rest yesterday?

Judge Agata: Well, yes.

Judge Tatsumi: I was so excited I didn't sleep a wink!

Judge Tatsumi: To think high school clubs would display such high level!

Judge Tatsumi: And today Ichiei, the best in the nation, will play. I truly can not wait.

Judge Kurokawa: Certainly, they have won for 5 consecutive years.

Judge Tatsumi: Exactly! That is amazing---

Judge Kurokawa: Then again, Ichiei's members are all children who aim to become professionals, so it's to be expected that they are at a completely different level.

Judge Tatsumi: You may be right about that but... Yesterday's Meiryo and Chibana's performances were perfect

Judge Tatsumi: I can't imagine what could possibly surpass that.

Page 3

Judge Tatsumi: ---Also, there is one school that has picked my interest.

Judge Kurokawa: !

Judge Kurokawa: Aah, you mean that problematic school...

Judge Kurokawa: They are out of the question, I would say.

Judge Kurowaka: How could they cause such a commotion and not get suspended?

Judge Tatsumi: They did explain to us that the students weren't really at fault for the incident.

Judge Kurokawa: Where there is smoke, there is fire. It's detrimental to the other students as well.

Judge Kurokawa: At least we, the judges, should give a proper and fair evaluation---

Judge Agata: Are you not planning to judge them solely based on their performance?

Judge Kurokawa: Eh...?

Page 4

Judge Agata: Excuse me but, it sounded to me like you are planning on lowering your rating over areas irrelevant to the performance, so…

Judge Kurokawa: ...I'm sorry you see it that way. To begin with, I don't believe you can separate the performance from the performer.

Judge Kurokawa: For instruments and music... Attitude. Courtesy, Respect... I believe those things are included in the performance.

Judge Kurokawa: And I will most definitely consider them in my judgment.

Judge Kurokawa: --Well, I don't know if you would understand this, Agata-sensei, since you are a musician who always does new things, like collaborating with other genres and using unusual performance methods without respecting the traditions.

Page 5

Judge Agata: I have never disrespected tradition.

Judge Arata: I am trying to explore all of its possibilities while cherishing it.

Judge Tatsumi: Now, now.

Judge Tatsumi [thoughts]: Man... These two are a pain in the ass as per usual...

Judge Tatsumi [thoughts]: ---Then again, the school in question... I feel sorry for the Tokise kids.

Judge Tatsumi[thoughts]: Even in the unlikely event that they make it to the top

Judge Tatsumi [thoughts]: I can clearly see the bashing we would receive from other schools and their parents.

Judge Tatsumi [thoughts]: I want to avoid that kind of hassle.

Page 6

Judge Tatsumi [thoughts]: But that doesn't mean I wouldn't be conscience-stricken if I lowered my ranking because of that.

Judge Tatsumi [thoughts]: At the end of the day

Judge Tatsumi [thoughts]: It will be fine as long as Tokise's performance is not that good.

Judge Nanba: Good morning---

Judge Tatsumi: Nanba-sensei, Iwagaki-san, good morning.

Judge Tatsumi [thoughts]: --My... to think I could be so calculating and cowardly.

Judge Tatsumi [thoughts]: I think I have become one boring adult.

Page 7

Isaki [thoughts]: I was a bit late to leave. I wonder if I can still ambush Takaoka-kun.

Isaki [thoughts]: Also, I wonder if Uzuki will be waiting for me

Isaki [thoughts]: If not… well, that's the path he chose for himself.

???: Isaki.

Page 8

Isaki: Eh?

Tetsuki: ...

Tetsuki: ...Whatever, I've already gotten used to it. This pattern.

Tetsuki: Alright, fine. I will get in.

Page 9

Isaki: ...Takaoka-kun, sorry.

Tetsuki: Eh?

Isaki: For every time I've taken you forcibly on a drive, I have not once felt an ounce of regret about it. If anything I enjoyed seeing how much you hated it.

Tetsuki: What?

Isaki: But today

Isaki: I regret it from the bottom of my heart. I'm very sorry.

Tetsuki: What's with that, suddenly? I'm scared now.

Isaki: Well, first off, get in.

Tetsuki: I reaally don't want to...

Isaki: Just do it

Tetsuki: Whaa---...

Page 10

*No text*

TL/N: Welcome to spooky season.

Page 11

Tetsuki: ----... Uh... umm...

Tetsuki [thoughts]: Don't... tell me

Tetsuki [sfx]: Turns

Isaki: Yup, as expected you are quick on the uptake.

Isaki: -----

Page 12

Isaki: That's Chika's father.

Chika(?): No joke, the air is so crisp and clear the moment you arrive at the venue!

Mittsu(?): It feels like something is about to happen

Satowa(?): Aren't there more people than yesterday?

Chika(?): Ah, you are right.

Suzuka: Well, it's Ichiei's, the Nation's number one, turn. Also--

Page 13

Student 1: Aren't those the Tokise people?

Student 2: Woah, they are.

Student 3: They do kinda stick out like a sore thumb...

Student 4: They really came...

Sane: Ri... right...

Suspicious men: Did you take it?

Chika: !

Satowa: Kudou?

Tsukaji: Hello, you guys!

Tsukaji: How are you feeling?

Page 14

Chika: Old man!

Tsukaji: Did you get proper sleep yesterday?

Chika: Ye- yeah

Suspicious guy 1: Who's that dude. Get outta the way---

Komaki: Whaaat---

Komaki: Are these Peeping Toms what I'm seeing here? Oh gosh, scaaryy-

Tsurugi: Security, over here--!

Suspicious guy 1: Shut up. What the hell!

Suspicious guy 2: Hey, let's just go.

Tsurugi: What? You shut up!!

Tsurugi: Are you ok?

Suzuka: I'm sorry. Thank you very much.

Student 1: Even voyeurs.

Student 2: Well, isn't this their own fault?

Page 15

Student 3: Isn't it because Tokise has come that people with no civility have gathered here?

Student 4: This is really bothersome.

Tsukaji: Ugh---

Chika: Old ma...

Sane: It's all good, Tsukaji-san.

Sane: I don't mean to brag here, but we are used to playing in hostile fields

Page 16

Mittsu: You really are bragging---

Satowa: Well, we have certainly got used to it.

Satowa: To people (audibly) talking behind our backs and being looked at with disdain.

Takezou [thoughts]: They really do have thick skin... Should I be happy about that...?

Hiro: Hozuki-chan is growing so fast.

Takezou [thoughts]: Ah but, what about the first years---

Atsumu: I used to get bullied! The fact that you guys are with me now makes me feel so at ease!

Natsu: I don't care about other people.

Takezou [thoughts]: Aah, so strong.

Sane: Wahaha we know, Momoya.

Page 17

Sane: Well, that's how it is. So you don't have to---

Tsukaji: I'm so touched...

Sane: Whaat--...?

Tetsuki [thoughts]: ...Isaki-san.

Isaki [thoughts]: ...Yes.

Page 18

Tetsuki [thoughts]: What is this ride from hell?

Isaki [thoughts]: Sorry. I'm really sorry...

Isaki [thoughts]: My brother didn't even contact me, he just suddenly appeared...!!

[flashback begins]

Chika's Father: ---Isaki

Isaki: Eh?

Isaki: Wai- what!? Bro- brother!?

Isaki: Wha- no way. Why are you here!? Don't tell me you came to listen to the performance!?

Page 19

Chika's Father: ...

Isaki: Ah, no.

Isaki: Sorry, I totally thought you were not coming. You gave me a start.

Chika's Father: I'm going back.

Isaki: What!?

Isaki: Now, wait a second. Why are you so bent out of shape over this? Didn't it take a lot of determination to come here!?

Isaki: And didn't you come all the way to where I'm staying hoping I could give you some room with Chika!?

Page 20

Chika's Father: ...I haven't really thought about something like that.

Chika's Father: I don't want to see him.

Isaki: ...Then why did you come all they way to this place.

Chika's Father: ...

Chika's Father: ... ....

Isaki [sfx]: Pissed

Isaki: Whatever, I gotta go pick those two up. For the time being, just get in the car, Brother!!

[end flashback]

Isaki[thoughts]: Maybe I was too reckless---

Page 21

Isaki [thoguths]: No, but if I let him like that, I'm sure Brother would've gone back...

Isaki [thoughts]: Even so, this atmosphere is so heavy---

Tetsuki: Um.

Tetsuki: Is today perhaps... your day off from work?

Isaki [thougths]: Takaoka-kun...

Chika's Father: No...

Tetsuki: Ah, that means you took a vacation day to come here, then.

Chika's Father [sfx]: Glare...

Tetsuki [thoughts]: Woah

Isaki: Hold on!! You drop that rude attitude towards Takaoka-kun right now, you stupid brother.

Chika's Father: !

Page 22

Isaki: He has always been beside Chika supporting him, and the reason he is able to smile now is because of Takaoka-kun!

Isaki: Instead of glaring at him shouldn't you be thanking him?

Chika's Father: ...I ...See.

Chika's Father: ... ... Sorry...

Tetsuki: Ah, not at all...

Isaki[thoughts]: A man who won't say"Thank you"...

Page 23

Chika's Father: ...Are you also his... friend?

Tetsuki & Isaki: !!

Uzuki: ...No. I'm...

Uzuki: The person who vandalized Chika's Granpa's place and then framed Chika as the culprit.

Tetsuki & Isaki [thoguths]: Geh....!!!!

Page 24

Chika's Father: Wha...

Uzuki: Also, recently, to make Chika look bad, I edited a video where he was helping out a kid from being harassed, posted it on social media, and it became trending.

Tetsuki: He- Hey, Uzuki Are you serious...

Chika's Father: ..Wha

Chika's Father: What... Are you saying...?

Chika's Father: You mean that incident, it wasn't the guys he hung out with---

Isaki: I don't know how many times I've told you, Chika had nothing to do with it.

Chika's Father: But... The fact that he was the cause of it is true, isn't it!?

Isaki: ...Trying to become happy... He grabbed onto Dad's hand, that's all.

Chika's Father: Hu...

Page 25

Uzuki: Fu ...If you had really looked at Chika.

Uzuki: You would have easily known that.

Isaki: Uzuki-kuuun?? You are right, but that is not something you should be saying, is it?

Isaki: You have no right to reproach my brother.

Page 26

Uzuki: ... I'm sorry...

Tetsuki [thoughts]: ...What is this ride from hell... (Second time)

Isaki [thoghts]: I promise I will invite you to eat expensive meat.

[flashback]

Chika's Father: You are a disgrace!!

Chika's Father: In your 3rd year of middle school, and you can't tell the difference between what is right and what is wrong to do!?

Isaki: Wait, Brother! Stop it, we are in front of Dad.

Chika's Father: You stay out of it!

Chika's Father: What's with those eyes. If you have an excuse, then say it

Chika: ...Nah, not really.

Page 27

Chika's Father: What did you say?

Chika: Whatever, I don't care.

Chika [memory]: Dad

Chika [memory]: Dad

Chika[distorted]: D a d...

Page 28

Chika: I don't give a shit about what you think about me anymore.

Chika [memory]: I'm sorry for being born.

[end flashback]

Page 29

Chika's Dad [thoughts]: Even if there is a person right next to me who framed my son for a crime.

Chika's Dad [thoughts]: Even if that person spits sarcasm at me.

Page 30

Chika's Dad [thoughts]: The right to be angry about such a thing.

Chika's Dad [thoughts]: I don't have it.

Sane: I'm glad we can sit together.

Kota: Riight?---

Page 31

Takezou's Mom: Takezou! Takezou!

Takezou: Ah

Chika: Your mom and dad?

Takezou: Yeah...

Chika: Wahaha You look just like your mom!!

Page 32

Assistant: Ichiei High School, you have 10 minutes before leaving.

Kifune-sensei: Yes, thank you. Ok, guys, let's get ready to leave---...

Page 33

Kifune-sensei: Mi...

Luka: Miran, it's time.

Page 34

Akira: If I remember correctly, Ichiei was playing 4th, right?

Suzuka: Yes.

Akira: Um... Did you notice? Ichiei's parts. Before, they---...

Suzuka: Aah, yes.

Program:

Solo - Luka Chevalier

1st Koto - Hoshou Sao

2nd Koto: Hanahata Imari

3rd Koto: Saotome Miran

17-Stringed Koto: Takamura Togo

Suzuka: Apparently, they have no intention of giving up first place this year either.

Side Text: The new interpretation of [Tomfoolery] that Luka and Miran's exchange has sparked is---...

---Kono Oto Tomare! will continue on the next issue!---

[gelly-fsh]

Diary of a (smitten) Mariachi

I've been having all types of thoughts about Mariachi James Potter, like you cannot honestly tell me that he would not thrive in it. I think his grandfather would have been a famous Mariachi and he just taught James how to sing and how to play the guitar.

When he was in Uni, he didnt want to depend solely in his parents money so he decided to put his grandpa's lessons in good use and start a small business out of it with a couple of friends and cousins that lived in the same city. They got pretty famous, especially when his cousin Mary decided to do a YouTube channel and a Tiktok account for the band.

And look, in the 3 years he has been doing this, he has come across some weird and scandalous shit. Until now his favorite was when a dude hired them to serenade his wife (apparently they had a fight) but when the woman didn't appear in her balcony the guy was so mad he asked them to come with him to go and serenade his mistress instead.

Yeah, fun times. At least that girl did love it.

Today, they had a morning job for a birthday. The guy who hired him (Barty, if he remembers correctly) gave him a rundown of what he wanted to happen, and James knew almost instantly this was one of those prank serenades. He hoped this Regulus guy didn't beat the shit out of anyone for waking him up with guitars and trumpets.

When they arrived to the house address, he could see they guy that he must assume is Barty waiting for them outside with a mischievous grin on his face.

"I gather that you're James Potter no?" The guy asked

"Pleasure to meet you" James said, shaking his hand "are you Barty?"

"The one and only" Barty confirmed. He quickly explained that his friend Regulus would be waking up in half an hour, so they had to be quick going upstairs (the house was fucking gigantic). When they were outside the door, all of them started to prepare their instruments and do a last check up on their clothes (Mary fixed James hat bc apparently it got crooked). He could see Barty taking out his phone, most probably to start recording everything, and then they went inside the room.

From the first notes of the trumpets and the violins, James could see clearly how the boy that was before sleeping so peacefully jump up so high he almost rolled out of the bed. But when he raised his head to see them, James breath hitched in astonishment.

That had to be the most prettiest boy he has ever seen.

Even bleary-eyed, with a dry trail of drool on his chin, and sheet marks in his cheeks, James could only think that he would really like to sing every love song ever invented to him, isn't that crazy?

"Estas son las mañanitas que cantaba el Rey David..." (This are the mornings that the King David sang about) James started as normally, he has sang Las Mañanitas a thousand times, the Vicente Fernandez version being one of the most popular, but James just didn't want to sing that one, it was to impersonal, so he just decided to throw the protocol out of the window and sing the version he really wanted.

"A los muchachos bonitos, se las cantamos aquí" (To the pretty boys, we sing it to them here)

"Si el Sereno de la esquina me quisiera hacer favor, de apagar su linternita mientras que pasa mi Amor" (If the watchman in the corner would be so kind, of turning off his little lamp while my Love passes by) He could feel the gazes of all the band members piercing through his skull, and for a moment James thought that maybe he shouldn't have sang the more romantic version of Las Mañanitas with a band full if family members and friends who could understand Spanish, he was fucked for the next family reunion, but Regulus face when he saw him sing made it worth it.

Remnants of sleep still filled his eyes, and when the song started he was in the middle of cursing Bartys whole bloodline out, but when he locked eyes with him, James could perfectly see how Regulus entire face turned into a beautiful shade of cherry red. He just sat in his bed with his gaze fixed on James while he sang about birds singing and the Moon hiding out, giving way to the beautiful morning that resided in his eyes.

"Si no estas enamorado, enamoráte de mi" (if you're not in love, fall in love with me) he sang with a small smile in his face, and he delighted himself by how Regulus face went even more red.

He sang the rest of the song effortlessly, and when he finished, James and all of band did a small bow in Regulus direction.

"Happy Birthday Mr. Regulus" James said with a soft smile on his face.

"Eh- ehm thank you" Regulus responded, sounding awfully flustered.

"Well that was no fun, you didn't even make that much of a fuss" Barty whined on the other side of the room "I bring you your favorite Mariachi as a present and you couldn't even give me more drama?, please Reg" James could exactly pinpoint the moment Barty realized he fucked up, did Regulus already knew James?

"BARTY!" Regulus hissed out, throwing a pillow that landed directly in Bartys face.

"You are a fan of ours?" James asked surprised, Regulus type was not exactly their normal audience

"You could say that..." Regulus mumbled

"He has watched all of the videos where you are and-" another pillow was thrown to Bartys face, the beautiful color red coming backbto Regulus cheeks.

"Well I am honored" James chuckled softly, before deciding that he might as well be bold, even if it was deeply unprofessional "Its not all days I find out such a beautiful boy is a fan of what I do"

The compliment got him exactly what he wanted, which was a small gasp and more of that beautiful blushing, oh he was down bad. Regulus opened his mouth to say something, but Mary used that moment to (rudely) interrupt them

"I am deeply sorry to interrupt, but today we have another job in the other side of the city, so we should get going" Mary interjected softly, looking a mixture of amused and regretful (as she should be, why is he interrupting hid attempts to woo the love of his life???) "Happy Birthday again Mr. Regulus"

All the band echoed the congratulations, before softly taking the instruments and leaving the room. James almost wished Barty had payed for more than one song. Mournfully, he gave Regulus one last glance before tipping down his hat and saying "Happy Birthday, Amapolita dorada" before leaving the room.

While going down the stairs, he was being teased by Mary and the others about how obvious his little crush was and how annoyed they where that he changed the song version at the last minute (they were not really, but they do sure liked to whine).

It was not until he was going out the door that he heard frantical footsteps going down the stairs, and James just stood there at the door, hope filling his heart when he saw Regulus disheveled form looking at him.

"Listen, I probably am reading the situation wrong but-" Regulus said breathlessly "If you like, wanted to go out or something..."

James never accepted something so fast in his life "absolutely, I want to see you again"

He could hear Regulus breath hitch, breathing out a soft "Oh, well" before pressing a piece of paper in James chest "it's my number, text me ok?"

"Oh I will" James smile was blinding, he got the interest and the number of one of the most handsome guys he has ever seen, and he was not wasting this golden opportunity so easily. In an act of chivalry (and maybe stupidity) he softly took Regulus hand and slowly took it to his lips, leaving a soft kiss in the dorsum of his hand "Until we meet again, Regulus"

"Until then, James" Regulus sounded breathless, and James smirked in delight at the knowledge that Regulus did know him before the performance.

Since then, everyone could see that James Potter sang love songs with a bit more sweetness to it, as if really really knew what he was singing about. With the beautiful muse that he had, how could he not?

[cat-astro-pick]

𝑻𝒉𝒆 𝑻𝒆𝒓𝒓𝒊𝒃𝒍𝒆 𝑾𝒐𝒓𝒅, 𝑳𝒐𝒗𝒆

𝑀𝑎𝑖𝑛 𝐶ℎ𝑎𝑟𝑎𝑐𝑡𝑒𝑟𝑠, 𝐸𝑧𝑟𝑒𝑎𝑙 𝑥 𝐹𝑒𝑚! 𝑅𝑒𝑎𝑑𝑒𝑟

There are all kinds of people in the world. If I could pick and choose people like the flavoured jellybeans in Harry Potter, I would. Contrary to what an elderly first-rate novelist once told me, my youth was not beautiful. There was no youth. And so, with a cigarette that tasted the bitterness of the world on my tongue instead of the sweetness of the jelly, I made my way to the basement. The stiff iron door wouldn't open with my hands, so I pressed my body against it and let the familiar music I'd heard so many times before blare through my ears and earbuds. With the door open, the next thing I did was put out my cigarette. I knew that if I didn't put out the cigarette, Sett or Kayn would argue.

If someone asked me if a flower garden that is neither fresh nor fragrant exists, I would say yes, of course it does. Because that barren, miserable flower garden was right here. If someone can passion were a flower, even these would be flowers. But as it turns out, passion doesn't bloom like a flower unless it's lucky. I hated the fact that I had a few stupid friends who were full of enthusiasm, full of things to do, but who couldn't shine, who were playing electronic instruments.

Actually, I didn't hate that fact; I hated myself for taking comfort in it, for seeing them as water. Their misfortune had become my good fortune. I leaned back on the couch, the worn leather sagging, yellow sponges protruding in spots. The floor was gleaming and shiny from daily oil mopping. When the soles of my shoes touched the floor and made an unpleasant squeak that sounded like a toddler's shoe, Yone stopped drumming and looked at me.

"What are you looking at?"

It was …suck. But it wasn't my feelings for Yone, it was my feelings for me. Yone raised an eyebrow at the harsh words that came out of my mouth. Yone reacted as if she was used to such harsh words. It wasn't just for Sett or Kayn's words. Nothing that came out of my mouth was what the Heartsteel members would consider soft and gentle. Maybe it's better to admit it, the words that came out of my mouth didn't go through my brain. It's only now, years later, that those around me have come to the conclusion that "she doesn't think when she speaks," but there was more going on in between. I hated being rough. So I'm always the one who loses when I play nice. I didn't want to lose, so I became more aggressive.

"...Where's Ez?"

"He's in there."

Yone's tone was gentle. Even those thin, fine fingers pointing across the room. Someone had said. People who have been through all kinds of winds and trials have rather rounded personalities. Friction and grinding make them more rounded. Yone might be one of those people, too. A gentle nature. It was an ideal I had been striving for all along, but I couldn't hope for it, it was too much of an…ideal.

"...Thank you."

I just wanted to mimic them, to think about what they would say in a situation like this. I always have a hard time saying thank you, I don't even have the strength to think of good words, so I just bowed my head to show my gratitude. I was so envious and jealous of people with such docile personalities. I didn't know if someone had put drugs in my cigarette filter or if I had finally lost my mind that day.

Even on a freezing cold day, Ezreal's voice was warm. As far as I can remember, Ezreal was always that way. He was playful, liked to flirt with girls, and was sensitive to other people's feelings. Timid, or worse, nerdy. I didn't think anything of him then. Well, I certainly didn't think anything of him now, too.

"Ez."

Even when I didn't speak loudly, Ezreal always heard me. I attributed it to his thin, light ears. To be honest, I projected myself onto him as I watched him hit the big time and then crash. Actually, I crashed before I could achieve anything called success. After my edpair, he was more aware of my moods than anyone else. It was the first time I cried in front of others, which I had always thought of as having a proud and stoic personality. Staying friends with Ezreal wasn't just because I liked him. It was because I don't trust people. Because if I turned my back on this stupid kid, he might unlock my past, and I'd be a stupid idiot again. Ezreal's soft-spoken nature was a disadvantage.

"You're early, aren't you?"

I hated his flirtatious smirk, the way his handsome face. Even the way he seemed to know he was handsome. I reached out and tugged futilely at a strand of green hair.

"Ack! What's wrong?"

"Nice job dyeing your hair. It's pretty."

"Really?"

Ezreal was always silly. Even now, when he sees me doing something rude like tugging on his hair, he smiles innocently at a compliment. His attitude made me feel like a stack of books was pressing against my heart behind my laughter. I couldn't tell what it was. It seemed to be something like guilt. My throbbing heart hurt more than my throbbing head. The heart reacts honestly. My head analyses my emotions coldly, but my heart beats faster. So, if we're being really honest, I am afraid of Ezreal's, my one and only friend's success.

I was afraid being pathetic of myself, and I was afraid of him. I was unhappy with my life, with a trashy personality that saw my friends' successes as my own misfortune, and I was unhappy with the fact that I would never show it. I didn't feel like a real friend, and that's why I was afraid of Kayn, and that's why I was afraid of Yone. I was afraid of Sett, I was afraid of K'sante, I was afraid of Aphelios. I was afraid of them all. It seemed that knowing that my feelings for Ezreal were not love, not friendship, but a crude mixture of envy and jealousy, would naturally tear me apart.

"So, Ez."

"When's your debut?"

In times like these, it's good to cover your mind with words.

"Next week? Since I'm so busy, I feel like I can get something done."

"My heart is beating really fast, touch it."

I was disgusted by the heat I felt between my hands, by the passion that radiated through his thin T-shirt as I held it to his heart. In hindsight, that feeling of disgust was not a disparagement of his passion; it was a disgust at my fear of it.

"...It's real."

"You must really like singing."

That doesn't mean I was faking my love of music. If anyone told me that my failure was simply due to a lack of passion for singing, I was prepared to smash them over the head with a porcelain water bottle.

"...Well...I envy you."

I whispered it without thinking. At this point, I might as well have been a shaman, foretelling Ezreal's success. Ezreal laughed softly. But what I noticed more than the laugh was the awkwardly lowered eyebrow and the sympathetic twinkle in his eye.

"I want you to see my show from the front row."

"You're my bestie, right?"

I nodded. I knew it was lip service. Friends, I didn't know if our relationship could really be defined as friends. Though if you truly consider me a friend, I would consider you a friend. Ezreal was social butterfly. He had a lot of good connections, and in those connections there would be people whose tastes overlapped with his own. In the midst of that wide, wide circle of relationships, he found me, the most insignificant of them all.

"Sure. Who else is going to put up with all your stupid behaviour?"

I reached out. Ezreal's hair was soft between my thin fingers. It felt puppyishly soft, and I wanted to tickle his chin, to touch him, to hold him, and that stupid feeling tickled my chest, swelling and bursting. It felt like I was darting a dart through my swollen heart like an advertising balloon. A shiver ran down my spine, from my heart to my shoulders and down to my lower abdomen. It was an irritatingly awkward feeling.

"...Ez."

"Huh?"

"...nothing."

How can I love you when you're so stupid?

[gunilslaugh]

I love your 5+1 fic! It was so cute 🥰

Can I request an enemies to lovers with gunil? something like gunil doesn't like y/n because of a miscommunication/rumour but as he gets to know y/n more as junhan's friend, he realizes the miscommunication/rumour is not true and he starts to like y/n little by little

Have a nice day! 💖

Omg thank you so much! 💕 Honestly I was really hesitant about posting the 5+1 fic because I didn't think I wrote it well, but it's received a lot of support, so I'm very thankful for everyone who has read it and left likes/reblogged it. Anyway way thank you for requesting I hope I did your request to your liking. 😊

Koo Gunil 

Trope:Enemies to Lovers (specifically enemies to friends to lovers)

Summary:In which Gunil realizes that his sole reason for hating you isn’t actually valid and the shift in his feelings afterward.

WC: 2.5k

Warning:grammar, one cuss word

Image not mine credits to owner.

You worked at a musical instrument shop in seoul. It was a small little store tucked up alongside a somewhat narrow street. You enjoyed working there and although you didn’t know much about actually playing them you knew quite a lot about the craftsmanship that went into making them. How the different use of materials affect how the instruments play and sound. 

Your best friend Hyeonjun loved that you worked here. He would frequently show up to “test out” the guitars. His other members would visit the store too, either along with Hyeongjun or by themselves. You liked his members, and got along well with them for the most part. The other part being Gunil. The two of you disliked each other and it was obviously by the sly little comments you'd always direct at the other.  The avoidance of even merely standing next to one another. 

Now why did this petty war of hatred come about? Well it was all Gunil’s fault.  You were nothing but nice to him, well until that day. You even remember the date, only because it also happened to be your nephew’s birthday. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ It was a rare occurrence, all the members had happened to visit you that day.  It was near closing time, so you were going around preparing to close up shop. Your phone rang with your nephew’s name lighting up the screen. You were still on working hours so answering would have been deemed as unprofessional, plus it was only fifthteen minutes till closing certainly the kid could wait. 

“Y/n could I play the drums? I’m gonna steal Gunil’s position” Jiseok said as we walked over to the drum set. 

“Sure, let me grab you some sticks” you walked over to where you kept the drum sticks, grabbing a set. Your phone rang for a second time, again you ignored it. While walking back over to Jiseok your phone would not stop ringing. 

“Just answer it,” he said, taking the drum sticks from your hand. “It’s not like we're gonna report you for being a bad employee” 

“Thanks” you said before answering the phone and bringing it to your ear. Upon answering your nephew immediately started rambling about how he felt too scared  about hitting the pinata tomorrow for his birthday party. “It’s not hard, you just hit it with a stick” you told your nephew trying to calm his nerves. Hearing a scoff you look up and see Gunil glaring at you. That was it that was the start of your enemies arc. You did nothing to him, yet he glared harshly at you.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Hearing the door chime you glance towards the door seeing Hyeongjun, Jiseok, and Jooyeon stroll in. 

“What brings you fellows here?”

“I need new strings and these two are avoiding practice” Hyeongjun stated gesturing to the boys standing next to him. 

“Not true, I need more picks,” Jiseok said

“I’m pretty sure you have at least ten in your pockets right now,” you rebutled.

“But none of the are yellow,” he walks over to the jar in the counter that says “free picks”  fishing for the yellow ones  

“What kind of strings?” you asked Hyeongjun. He responded, you nodded making your way to the back room where inventory was. You returned with the strings walking behind the counter to ring them up. “Anything else?”

“What time does your shift end?” Jooyeon questioned

“5:30pm why?”

“Wanna grab dinner with us?”

“Us meaning?” You inquired having no intentions of wanting to see Gunil that day.

“The four of us here, no Gunil.” Jooyeon clarifies with a sigh at the end.

“Sounds good” you replied after putting Hyeongjun’s strings in a bag. He hands you the money, you then hand him the bag.

“So Gunil sounds bad?” Jiseok pesters you. You sigh giving him a getty unamused face 

“Shouldn't you guys be heading back to practice now?”

“Tell us why you hate him first?”

“He started it.” 

“How?”

“He glared at me for no reason and was always giving me the cold shoulder, so I simply return his actions,”

“You’re literally just being petty!” Jooyeon laughs out.

“Have you ever asked him why he glared at you?” Hyeongjun asks 

“No, it's not like he talks to me long enough to ask anyway” 

“Have you ever actually tired though?” 

“......no, but that’s not the point you guys need to get back to practice. Now leave,” you said walking around the counter to push them towards the door. 

“We’ll pick you up after your shift!” Jooyeon shouts over his shoulder as you shut the door behind them.

 The boys had returned from their trip to the shop and resumed practice as a whole group. After monitoring the recording of the song they were currently working on. They decided it was a good time to wrap practice for the day. 

“Anyone wanna grab dinner together?” Gunil asks the group.

“Can’t Hyeongjun, Jiseok and I have plans with y/n” Jooyeon replies. Hyeongjun notices the shift in Gunil’s mood at the mere mention of your name.

“Seriously, why do you dislike her so much? She’s my best friend.” Irritation notable in Hyeongjun’s voice. 

“I’m curious about that too,” Seungmin approaches “It seems like you just out of the blue started hating her,”

“It was not out of the blue,” Gunil defends. The other members had now all gathered around at this point, wanting to know the reason behind the negative feelings.

“Well?” Hyeongjun pushes.

“She insulted my craft,”

“Y/n wouldn’t do that,” Hyeongjun immediately speaks on your behalf.

“Yes she did. That time we were all at the store, it was close to closing and Jiseok asked to play the drums, saying he was gonna steal my position. She went and grabbed sticks for him. Shortly after handing the sticks to him she said “It’s not hard, you just hit it with a stick,”” he explained, making air quotes around the words that caused this whole mess.

“Dude she was talking to someone on the phone then,” Jiseok started. “It kept ringing, so I told her to just answer it. I don’t know who she was talking to, but I’m pretty sure that sentence wasn’t about playing drums.” he finished explaining.

“What?!” Gunil’s eyes widened at the information Jiseok just delivered. Hyeongjun now recalling that day steps in.

“She was talking to her nephew about a pinata. It was his birthday that day and his parents had gotten him a pinata for his party, but he got nervous about it. He called y/n about it and she said that to calm him down,” Hyeongjun explained. 

“So i've been hating her over insulting something she didn't actually insult,” he sighs feeling like a complete moron. 

“You should apologize to her,” Hyeongjun insists.

“How?”

“We’re grabbing dinner with her so do it now,” Jooyeon piped up

“So suddenly?”

“No time like the present. Look, we'll just make it a whole group dinner. We’re picking her up after her shift anyway. You guys can talk it out before then meet us at dinner,” Jooyeon stated like it was obvious. “Now let's go!” he enthusiastically said, pushing their leader out the door.

You had just finished locking the door to the shop when you heard familiar voices approaching. Looking up you see the members, all of them. 

“Jooyeon this is not what you said,” an annoyed look coming over your face.

“I know, I know, but that was before a groundbreaking discovery was made,” confused you looked over to Hyeongjun, wanting an explanation. He came up to you grabbing both of your hands in his.

“He’s right. Gunil has something he needs to tell you-”

“What if I don’t want-”

“Stop being childish” he cuts you off. “It’s time you two talk things out,” You let out a sigh at his words. You know he’s right, but there is some stupid pride you don't want to let go of.

“Fine,” you said bitterly.

“Good, the both of you talk, then meet us at dinner,” Smiled before walking back towards his members. They begin to walk off leaving you and Gunil alone. That atmosphere became awkward, both staring at your shoes in silence.

“..so Hyeongjun said you have something to tell me,” 

“Yeah uh- I just” he paused, taking a breath. “....I’m sorry,” 

“What! You? Sorry?” Not believing the words you just heard. “Why?”

“I misunderstood you,”

“About what?”

“Playing the drums. That day Jiseok talked about stealing my position. You handed him the sticks then said  “It’s not hard, you just hit it with a stick,” I thought you were talking to Jiseok about playing the drums,” he explained. Now you understand. He hated you cause he thought you insulted the art of playing the drums. 

“But I wasn’t talking about playing the drums I was talking about”

“A pinata” he finished your sentence. “I know that now, which is why I’m apologizing,”

“I’m sorry too,” you said.

“Huh?” he looked at you slightly confused.

“I was mean to you too, without any good reason at that. I was just being petty and childish, so I’m sorry,” you let out a light laugh. “We’re both idiots,”

“Yeah we are, so we’re cool now?”

“Yeah we’re cool,”

“This is the part where you guys hug!” You hear Jooyeon’s voice shout from a distance. Both you and Gunil look around spotting the members coming out from where they were hiding just around the corner. Breaking out into laughter at their antics, but nonetheless opening your arms for a hug. Gunil mirrors your actions as you guys share your first hug. Then you all proceeded to go to dinner, Gunil and you even opting to sit next to each other at the restaurant.

Your relationship with Gunil changed massively after the miscommunication was resolved. Your title of enemies was changed to friends. Now, depending on if your shift hours allowed, you’d find yourself visiting their practice room. Something you never really did before due to your pettiness of not wanting to be in the same room as Gunil.

Waiting on the floor of the practice room for them to finish up. Hyeongjun and you planned on catching a new movie you guys wanted to see after their practice today. Your eyes gravitated towards Gunil landing on his arms as he rhythmically hit the drum set. His arms were strong that was clear to see, but when he hugged they were very gentle as if- wait why are you thinking about that? It was months ago. Why are you thinking about it now? You shift your attention to Hyeongjun as he plays his solo part uttering a quiet “Go bestie!” as to not disturb their practice.

They had finally finished up for the day. You and Hyeongjun said goodbye to the other members then leaving to go catch the movie. 

“You were staring at Gunil earlier,” 

“I was staring at you too,” you refuted, but a blush was creeping its way up your neck at the news of being caught. “What? I can’t stare at someone playing an instrument?”

“You can it was just odd since you use to avoid him so insistently,” 

“That was quite some time ago, heck he even visits me in the store without you now.”

“He does?” This being new information to him.

“You didn’t know? Yeah he usually comes at least once a week and he tries to walk me home on days my shift ends late,” you told Hyeongjun with an unknown smile on your face, but he saw it.

“He never mentioned anything about it,” You two had arrived at the theater so your conversation ended there, but Hyeongjun was definitely gonna investigate Gunil about this later.

That later arrived when Hyeongjun came back to the dorm that night.

“Gunil! I need to talk to you,” he called out after setting his stuff down in his room. 

“What’s up?” Gunil asked.

“You visit y/n once a week and walk her home when it’s late?” The investigation has begun.

“Well yes why? Is it a problem? Did I make her uncomfortable?” Gunil starts to ramble. 

“No you didn’t. It’s just I don’t even always visit her once a week and maybe I’m a bad friend, but I’ve never walked her home when it was late either. I just tell her to text me,” Gunil wasn’t sure how to respond. His feelings for you had truly shifted maybe even farther than he had realized. In the beginning he never even thought about you walking home at night alone, but now on those nights he could only worry about something happening to you. He looks forward to his weekly visits to you. This usually ended up being his favorite time of day. Your name that used to single handedly annoy him now made him feel warm. Perhaps his once hatred had now grown into love. Holy shit that was it he loved you. 

“I love her,” he muttered out in realization.

“What did you say? I couldn’t hear you,”

“I love her,” he stated more confidently. 

“You love my best friend! I guess there really is a fine line between love and hate isn’t there? What are you gonna do?” 

“Do you think she likes me back? You know her the best,”

“It’s possible. I’ve noticed some things lately,” 

“Really like what?”

“Y/n will kill me if I tell you. Just talk to her yourself. I think you’ll have a decent chance,” 

The next day Gunil worked up the courage to confess to you after your shift. He waited for you outside, the same place where you guys made up. 

“Oh Gunil, what brings you here?” You see him upon exiting the store.

“I have something to tell you,”

“That sounds vaguely familiar,” you half joked.

“Yeah it does,” he chuckled and paused before continuing “After we shifted from enemies to friends my heart did stop. It shifted even farther. I love you way more than a friend.” he confessed. His words caused you to realize that your feelings had shifted beyond friends as well. 

“So shall we change our title to lovers now then?” He stared at you eyes wide with a smile appearing on his face.

“You mean?”

“I love you too,” you confessed too.

“This is the part where you guys kiss!” Once again an all too familiar voice shouted from the distance and not soon after the member came out from behind the corner. Shyness consuming you at the thought of the members seeing you guys kiss. Noticing this Gunil turns you so you’re blocked by his strong build.

“Is this ok? Can I kiss you?” He asked looking in your eyes for reassurance.

“Yes, it’s ok,” you nodded. He leaned in sealing your lips together and sealing your title as lovers.

“You hurt her, I kill you” Hyeongjun says at Gunil once you walked to meet the members. Which makes everyone laugh. “Hey! I’m being serious!”

[leoramage]

Tagged by @charlosgoggles, I was pretty busy and kind of late when I saw the post! I immediately sat down once I had my free time to do this. Thank you for the tag my co-F1 astrology bestie in this app!

name: Leora Mage is actually an anagram of my real name! i am currently using it as a penname and stage name!

sign: my big three is leo-gemini-pisces!

time: its apparently 6:47 p.m. when i started writing this down. 9 p.m. when i finished (i had duties to attend to.)

favourite band/artist: i am the music bestie that listens to anything. you can't pin me down and tell me to list my favorite artists/band! ಠಿ⁠_⁠ಠ anyways here's the following:

solo artists: taylor swift, lana del rey, rihanna, doja cat, britney spears, ariana grande, olivia rodrigo, beyoncé, jennifer lopez, madonna, lady gaga, ava max, camila cabello, qveen herby

bands/groups: in this moment, ghost, the great discord, the neighborhood, the chainsmokers, little mix, blackpink, 2ne1, exo, bigbang, coldplay

bonus: i listen to classical music too (tchaikovsky, mozart, beethoven, etc.)

last movie: burlesque (as in christina aguilera) and house of gucci! i watched it for like a whole bus trip.

last show: house of the dragon! i love rewatching because of sir harwin strong & aemond targaryen!

also drive to survive as well, i was finding the episode fernando was in because i told my mom a local artist here in my country has physical similarities to fernando hahahaha

when I created this blog: i created this blog last year's ummer - solely for my practice, learn knowledge from other practitioners about my craft. i happen to love astrology too so it kind of stuck with me and my theme! i am continuously learning and mastering my craft but at the same time explore more.

other blogs: i have another tumblr blog but i forgotten what was the username but i do believe that i made that blog for roleplaying and posting my photo manipulation for a fandom i used to be in.

do I get asks: not until belle and becca sent me a game! i passed them on to my favorite writers and some to my moot blogs. i was supposed to send one to @charlosgoggles but they do not have their ask on lmfao

followers: 20 blogs are following me. most of them are my moots for sure or bots. idk, i did not check who is following me. i do not check who is following me to be fair (⁠ ⁠◜⁠‿⁠◝⁠ ⁠)

average hours of sleep: 5-6 hours but sometimes longer. i work harder than i sleep.

instruments: guitar, ukelele, piano keyboard, violin. i only have a guitar and keyboard with me and i haven't touched them for ages. i learned how to play the other instruments because of my acquaintances who are passionate about music or simply band members.

what I am wearing: black maxi dress that i made myself!

dream job: i do believe i can be who i wanted to be if i put effort in it. so basically i do not have a dream job.

dream trip: world tour (my work requires a lot of that and isolation from the world. so it's quite a tough journey considering the rough waves of the ocean but anything for the bag of moneh)

favorite song atm: uh i do not have a favorite song at the moment. but i listen to subliminals a lot because they just calm my mind (my brain is so active that i need to decelerate it from thinking about the most obnoxious things) but let me check my most played in spotify... okay it says:

dance the night - dua lipa

tagging: @folkloresthings , @lorarri , @love-belle / @love-bellee , @goldsainz and @opheliaas-stuff because you guys are the sweet ones i had been interacting with for the past few days. i love them sm ฅ[⁠ᓀ⁠˵⁠▾⁠˵⁠ᓂ⁠]ฅ

(p.s. feel free to do in your own comfort 𔘓 much love guys 🤍🩷💕)

[hawkepockets]

i’m finally getting to those tav asks. thanks everyone who sent one!! the lovely @dragonologist-phd asked for #1, which includes birthplace & family, and i Got To Thinking in too much detail, much too much detail by far, too detailed, so here’s a separate post for just those elements.

jove grew up in baldur’s gate. they did have a clan, but it wasn’t a biological family unit—it was an all dragonborn craftsmen’s guild! most members were copper, brass, red or gold dragonborn who used their fire or acid breath to manipulate metal and glass. jove wasn’t born with that skill. their mother was a vagabond blue dragonborn, and although jove inherited their father’s brassy scales, they also manifested their mother’s electrical breath type, which wasn’t of any use in metalworking. the clan was warm to insiders but highly competitive and proud of their handiwork, and judged members’ worth almost solely by what they could craft. jove knew they’d be fed and cared for, but only tolerated, unless they excelled at a trade.

as a teenager, jove struck up a friendship with ritika estis, a much older gold dwarf metallurgist from a rival crafting guild. estis taught jove how to use a dwarven forge to work with metal, glass, and jewels using tools instead of relying on naturally heatproof hands and melting breath. estis was tough on jove, working them hard and giving praise sparingly, but every compliment meant the world to the young dragonborn. she built up their confidence to apply for a jeweler’s apprenticeship with their clan.

but estis also noticed that despite their dogged devotion to learning their father’s trade, jove was much more moved by folk songs and carved wood than any bauble made for a baldurian noble. jewelrymaking made them focus and sweat; music made them tap their foot, twitch their tail, and part their lips to try to taste it. it was a different kind of love. the day jove won their jeweling apprenticeship, estis went to them and, in a rare moment of open encouragement, urged them to forget the forge and learn to make music and instruments instead.

jove took up a secret, second apprenticeship with a human master luthier, learning to craft and repair string instruments and, tentatively, how to play the fiddle with their big, clawed hands. when the clan found out, jove was pressured to choose one trade and master it, instead of burning themself out to fail at both. with the self-assurance they’d learned from estis, jove committed to making instruments. many of their older clanmates were deeply embittered toward ritika and her guild for molding a promising young metalworker just to turn them against the family trade, but jove was happy.

after years of practice under the luthier, jove achieved the rank of journeyman and started to make gold for their clan selling handcrafted string instruments and repair services. they were much better at working on instruments than playing them, but had achieved enough skill on the fiddle to play gigs at local taverns and make passersby smile at them on festival days. they were more than content, and would have lived happily as an amateur musician and aspiring master luthier in the gate for the rest of their days.

and then came the bar fight.

fights weren’t that unusual for the cheaper inns and alehouses jove played music at, but this particular brawl started with a human woman harrassing a tiefling bachelor party, talking loudly about how they brought crime and sour luck on baldur’s gate, and shouldn’t be allowed to marry lest their offspring overrun the city. when she implied they killed and ate human children, one of the prouder and drunker tieflings took a swing at the woman. she reacted as though she’d been attacked, unprovoked, by the whole party, and other non-tieflings sprung to her defense. within seconds, the taproom turned into a battlefield, and within minutes all the celebrating tieflings were senseless on the floor. when the guards arrived, it was the tieflings who were arrested for disturbing the peace.

jove watched the whole thing, their bow sliding uselessly off the strings, unsure what they could do short of belching out a cone of lightning that would hit attackers, tieflings, and bystanders indiscriminately—so they did nothing.

when they told their master what happened, he was unsympathetic to the tieflings, saying that the other humans had taken things too far but that they hadn’t been wrong about the “foulbloods.”

jove got up before sunrise, stole their favorite of the violins they’d crafted and a simple glaive from estis’s forge (she would have given it freely if they’d woken her to ask, but jove couldn’t risk talking to her—if estis was as callous about the tieflings as their other mentor had been, it would break their faith completely), and left baldur’s gate. they’ve been roving the sword coast ever since, a vagabond like their mother, determined to protect strangers’ right to live and celebrate life loudly, especially those from “monstrous” races. this became the foundation of their paladin’s oath.

they’ve gotten rusty on the fiddle. but on the night of celebrating peace between the druids and tieflings, they’re compelled to play again.

[loremmagazines]

Issue 4 - Grocery Bag

It’s no secret that Austin, TX is a hotbed for musical talent, producing captivating live acts in any available corner. While compiling a list of every must-see band may feel like a seemingly impossible task, there’s no doubt that Grocery Bag would find themselves at the top.

Acting as one of Austin’s premiere rock ensembles, Grocery Bag leaves audiences in the wake of their own fevered mosh pits, incited solely by the fast paced rhythms that define the “psyche-punk” ethos found in every one of their live performances. Now being recognized by the Austin music scene with nominations in the Austin Music Awards and official showcases as SXSW artists, Grocery Bag has found themselves with the recognition they have long been deserving of.

The band is fronted by guitarist Bella Martinez, with Jimmy Mercado on drums, Dillon Aitala on lead guitar, and Logan Kerman on bass. 

_____________________________________________________________

Following an electrifying performance filled with intense head banging and frequent crowd surfing, Grocery Bag and I found ourselves seated on the back patio of Hotel Vegas discussing how the the current lineup of the group came to be.

Bella: Grocery Bag used to be an old band that I had in San Antonio. I had gotten asked to do a show and I was like “Hey guys (current Grocery Bag line-up) I have this old band, would you guys possibly want to start something with this?”

Logan: We literally had our first band practice over Instagram Live mid-covid.

_____________________________________________________________

Met with a coalescence of shared influences ranging from Rush, Ty Segall, The Police, and more, Grocery Bag has found themselves with a truly unique sound. With the ability to show off their technical virtuosity in a musically rewarding way, the group allows each and every song to be elevated beyond a previously set standard.

Dillon: I think it’s our love to create. I want to reciprocate in some sort of way, the energy our favorite bands give us. All of the bands we love, we want to put it into our own words by playing our instruments.

Jimmy: I just like how, complex musicianship can like, heighten a song and make it super intriguing and powerful. I think bands like Yes and Rush, they just compliment the music with their drums differently then maybe someone like, Ringo Starr. 

_____________________________________________________________

Following the release of singles such as Alone and XING, Grocery Bag announced their highly anticipated debut album Break You, with an official release in November of 2023. This quintessential introduction was set to record at Matchbox Studios with producer Jackson Baker at the helm.

“Without him the album wouldn’t be the same.”

Bella: It was a whole week of being together in such a great environment with Jackson. It felt like we were hanging out with our homie, making music with him. He was just like ‘oh, do this, do that, add this!’”

Jimmy: When you think of a producer, they’re someone who really thinks about the music. Jackson really spiced it up and put his flavors into it and made it sound amazing. It was just like working with your best friend. 

_____________________________________________________________

As our interview with Grocery Bag was wrapping up, a security guard from Hotel Vegas kindly informed us that they were closing for the night. Making their way back inside to gather their gear, the band was kind enough to answer one final question before heading out.

Each member of Grocery Bag has had their own unique level of involvement in the Austin music scene prior to the group’s formation. From playing in multiple bands, being a concert photographer, booking DIY shows, and more, this band has been, and still is, a part of the engine that keeps this scene alive.

Now being recognized by the Austin Chronicle as a nominee for Best New Act at the Austin Music Awards, along with their recently announced status as the official artist of SXSW, their hard work is beginning to receive the recognition it has been deserving of.

_____________________________________________________________

Jimmy: It really means something that people would nominate us. It’s really it’s own destiny in a way.

Logan: I think it’s just motivation to keep going. It’s validation that we’re adding to the collection of music Austin produces. 

Dillon: A true privilege. I feel very lucky, I definitely don’t deserve this life nor to play in a band like this.

Bella: It feels pretty crazy! Also, it’s Dillon’s first band!

_____________________________________________________________

With each electrifying performance leaving a trail of audiences in a fevered frenzy, Grocery Bag continues to solidify their status as Austin's hottest band. As they gear up for a packed schedule of official SXSW showcases, you can listen to Grocery Bag’s latest release, 'Break You', available on all streaming platforms. Keep an eye out for restocks of physical copies in select Austin record stores; copies of this must-own album sell out fast!

[maximummuses]

Damian has spent a lot of time around weapons. More time around them than a child should ever have to. One of the most important lessons he ever learned from his childhood, one which was drilled into his head over and over again, was to only draw a weapon with the intent to use it. They weren't toys, nor were they tools for the sole purpose of making someone feel a little bit unsafe. They were instruments used for the sole purpose of causing harm. That alone has earned any weapon respect and caution. Everything in the world has more gravity to it when so much if it can kill you.

Somewhat wearily, he steps towards the table. Though the lenses of the domino mask hide his eyes, he's keeping careful watch over everything around him, just in case something isn't to code. It's impossible to be too careful in a city like Gotham, where it feels like everything has teeth and is itching for a pound of flesh. Robin would like to think himself a reigning monarch of the shadows. One of their undisputed masters, even. But even he knows that the shadows are never completely safe in Gotham City. So he learns to live with eyes on the back of his head.

"The ball is in your court," Damian glares, waiting for some kind of an answer from Cat. He can't say he knows her or her criminal history. Not even her name. But what he does know is that, be it out of the goodness of her heart of self-preservation, she helped him. And though Damian doesn't want to make a habit out of it... maybe he can turn a blind eye in exchange for a little bit more help. Maybe.

"Capo? He called himself the Italian word for boss?" Could be related to some of Falcone or Maroni's old holdouts, if not one of them. Despite the deaths of both Falcone and Maroni, members of the old guard still liked to play empire and act like they didn't live in a world where the mob was nothing compared to a serial killer who dresses like a clown. "Tell me more. What else did you notice about him?" The description Cat offered, while helpful, doesn't do much to narrow down any potential suspects. "Voice; eye color; body language; even the shoes he was wearing. Anything helps."

            RIPPLE OF ANXIETY, grip on the gun tightening briefly, looking down to it before looking up to the mask with bland expression. she raised the weapon up and fiddled at it for a couple heartbeats to click on the safety, though doing so did make her more sensitive to her surroundings, and green gaze was fervent on side to side motions to check no one had managed to find their strength or footing. the IDEA was to have it just in case, but she had lost the advantage of having it ready. still, the street rat relented to the fact that if someone were to pounce at her now, the hero would at least probably give her the benefit of protection. jail impending or not, it was a fair guess he wouldn't let her die she figured.

      the fleeting concerns weren't worth her pondering in the long run, as she tucked the gun away regardless when she picked up the package, bringing it over and placing atop one of the multitude of crates in the warehouse. the makeshift table g r o a n e d from the weight, revealing its age and emptiness, but hardly was attention paid mind passed using it for a spot to place. drawing back, cat scuffed her sneakers against the ground before beginning to wander, a way of trying to get her mind to refocus from the adrenaline still spiking to the tips of her fingers. every inch of her was loud and buzzing even if apathy settled the weight of her display.

                     "hmmm," acknowledging she had heard the inquiries and was thinking. a part of her wanted to see what he would be willing to give her in exchange, but cat flickered thoughts on that would just make things worse for her in the long run. trying to... not blackmail but bribe her way through the situation might not go well. something told her there was already a red x now painted on her back with this group. the last thing she needed was h e r o e s perceiving her a big enough threat to chase her down; if she even got away from the present encounter, that was.

         she toed at a man still out cold... that couldn't be good in terms of brain damage, she figured, but brunette didn't care. tongue was bitten, sharp and copper tanged. eventually, "he called himself capo or something. thick, italian accent, gray hair, very thick brows. kind of older, wrinkly... surrounded by burly dudes. i don't want t'say mafia or anything but he was at least, like, pretending t'be mafia or something. maybe just thought it made him look cooler. wore this ugly, dark blue suit that made him look like a rectangle. a'least the ONE time i saw him. it was a brief meeting. he didn't seem too interested in me, hence figuring i was jus' getting some easy delivery gig."

[lilacknights]

Obey Me Headcanons: What Your Favorite Demon Brother Says About You (but make it too personal)

ALTERNATE TITLE: I judge you based on your favorite brother but I'm not very good at it

CHARACTERS: Lucifer, Mammon, Leviathan, Satan, Asmodeus, Beelzebub, and Belphegor

AUTHOR’S NOTE: As much as I agree with all the other similar headcanons out there, I also want to write my own take on the “what your favorite character says about you” HCs. So I shall be using my very limited knowledge on psychology, personal development, and how to attack people where it hurts.

WARNINGS: (Edited) As the title already states, these HCs might or might not be on a personal level. This is not angst but please read with caution. But please don’t take any of these too seriously. I’m mostly basing on my own analysis of the characters and their representations.

✄ ——————————————————–

LUCIFER:

You’re used to sacrificing. Whether or not you get the recognition for it, you still continue to give and give and give to people.

However, it makes it harder to address your own lack of emotional support because you don’t know how to ask for help.

Do you really favor this character because he’s “dominant” or does it bring you comfort that someone else is taking the lead and you finally get to take a break?

And do you really just want him to eat and sleep well, or are you projecting towards this character as if he was you? Maybe, just maybe, you’re taking care of him the way you would have wanted people to take care of you?

Just in case no one had told you this today: You’re doing great, pal. I promise you won’t lose your value just because you stopped working. You deserve a break, too.

—————————–

MAMMON:

Ah yes, the classic black sheep of the group.

Is it a family thing? Or maybe you’re the forgotten member of your friend group? The one constantly left behind? The one who is only asked out at the last minute because you weren’t really part of the plan and they just needed someone to fill in the spot?

Or maybe you’re the one whose efforts are always thrown under the rug because someone is always better than you.

Like any human being, you have made mistakes throughout your lifetime. Which would be fine if only people would stop focusing on your shortcomings and forgetting about your achievements.

You want to support this man and be there for him when the whole world is against him — because that’s also what you’ve always wanted. To have someone. Someone who would stop looking at you for what you aren’t and start seeing you for what you could be.

—————————–

LEVIATHAN:

Maybe, just maybe, you have a savior complex… but not exactly in a bad way.

It’s more in the “I’ve always felt ashamed of myself but this man doesn’t have to be.” kind of way. This makes you a good person if I do say so myself.

You have your own particular special interest at one or several points of your life but no one ever reciprocated the same excitement you have towards it, making you question whether it was even worth the attention you gave it.

Have you ever had an interest on an instrument, a sport, or maybe something with arts or writing? But because none of those are “real jobs”, you had to let go? Have you been asked something along the lines of “would that be able to pay the bills?” when you tried to introduce an idea to people?

A part of you probably still longs for that encouragement that never came. And so you’re doing it for someone else.

—————————–

SATAN:

How’s the life of the "second best" treating you? /lh

Somewhat similar to those who favor Mammon, you were probably used to having someone else take all the credit for who you are.

Ever had a family member brag about your achievements as if they are the sole reason behind your success? Or maybe you’ve had an older sibling or a senior that everyone thinks is your “inspiration” and it made you feel like your own actions are never your own?

You also probably have a type and that type is a man who does the bare minimum. I don’t know what to tell you but this is most likely the case. (If it’s not, then good for you. /gen)

“He’s not being an asshole towards me and he respects my boundaries and he reads??? Sign me the fuck up.” - You, probably. If I’m wrong, good. But if I’m right, then you and I need to have a proper talk.

—————————–

ASMODEUS:

Your attachment and abandonment issues are showing, bud.

People say that those who favor him are the horny fans but it’s not all there is to it, isn’t it?

Is it possible that you find comfort that this conventionally attractive and well-known individual chose you? Is it possible that, out of all the people he could have had, you’re finally the first choice?

Tell me, how many times were you just an option? How many instances did family, friends or potential lovers didn’t put you first?

Or maybe you’re the introverted little bean in every room that needs someone else to remind you that you’re actually liked. You need that one person to explicitly tell you that “yes, you are wanted.” before your intrusive thoughts take over and make you believe that you’re just a waste of space.

—————————–

BEELZEBUB:

I don’t know what to say except you probably just want to take a break from all the physical, mental, or emotional bullshit going on in your life.

You probably need a hug (preferably against soft tits) and want to live the quiet life with little to no stressors once in a while.

He reminds you of peace and simplicity, and that’s a good thing.

Not sure what you all think but this man is probably the healthiest brother to be biased towards.

I do hope real life for you finally settles down and you get the peace of mind you’ve always wanted. You got this.

—————————–

BELPHEGOR:

Holy shit, you’re fucked up. Are you okay? For real?

Because if Mammon or Satan are kind of the “neglected guy” representation, this one is the forgotten left-in-the-attic version. The difference with this though is that you’ve probably became numb at one point.

Something inside you probably died a long time ago and you just stopped giving a shit. It could be a good thing or a bad thing, mostly depending on your attitude towards it.

You probably weren’t exactly given the biggest responsibilities growing up but, unfortunately, no one expected big things from you because of this — and neither did you.

Also, you’re either a degradee or a degrader. There’s nothing in between. I also believe you’re pretty chill but would be willing to set a building on fire when given enough reason to.

——————————————————– ✄

I haven't written in forever! I do hope you all enjoyed this because I DIDN'T. Asmodeus and Leviathan were basically me attacking myself LMAO — 🌷

[ohnominamino]

An Essay on Love in Evangelion: 3.0+1.0 Thrice Upon a Time

Evangelion: 3.0+1.0 Thrice Upon a Time is a movie about love in all its forms. From the love of family, friends, and neighbors, to the compassion we feel for people we have never met. The movie reminds us that love is something we continuously gain, lose, and choose, again and again. Which love is greatest? In my opinion, the answer to that question is left up to interpretation. In this essay, I will give my own personal interpretation on certain character interactions and what I believe we are meant to take away from their Rebuild portrayals. 

The character I will start with is one I’ve noticed the most outrage over from people who haven’t seen the movie and read out-of-context spoilers: Kaworu Nagisa. 

Kaworu is a beloved character among many Evangelion fans, especially those who are members of the LGBT+ community. He is a canonical love interest of Shinji Ikari and I want to reassure people that this final movie does not change that fact. However, it does not make the couple blatantly endgame either. This skirting around the couple might make some fans upset, and while their feelings are completely valid, I do not think they fully understand the difficulties faced by LGBT+ people in Japan, nor do they understand the way that romance is typically conveyed in Japanese storytelling. (I recommend watching “Is ‘Yuri On Ice’ Good Gay Representation?” by James Somerton for more about storytelling nuances.) 

What have we been shown about Shinji and Kaworu’s love? The good news is, anything you read into the original TV series and End of Evangelion is completely true for the Rebuilds— because Kaworu is the same Kaworu. This movie proves Evangelion is a single universe set on repeat, and that Kaworu and Shinji meet each other every loop, and in each, Kaworu is trying to make Shinji happy. Within the final movie, Shinji becomes aware of the loops and chooses to break the cycle and free Kaworu from his pain. 

What does the relationship between Shinji and Kaworu teach us? I believe the purpose of their love is to show the audience that first, in the words of Kaji, “love has no gender.” Second, I believe Kaworu’s love in particular is a warning about basing your own happiness solely upon another person. There are parallels drawn between Gendo/Yui and Kaworu/Shinji. Gendo could not exist without Yui, and so he was willing to destroy the world to be reunited with her. For Kaworu, it was not the destruction of humanity, but the destruction of himself that defined his tragedy. What’s important within the final movie, in my opinion, is that Shinji does not reject Kaworu’s love. With the insight he’s gained from remembering past loops, he sees Kaworu’s love and appreciates him, but he also sees his suffering and wants to ease it. He helps Kaworu into a new world where he can seek his own happiness and find balance in his life (something his father did not have). 

While Kaworu and Shinji are not seen as an explicit couple at the end of the movie, it’s significant to note that, when he sets Kaworu free, Shinji holds out his hand to Kaworu as a promise to stay together. Over the course of the movie, Shinji comes to accept his connection to others through accepting touch (in the form of hand holding and hugs from Rei, Misato, and Gendo); however, Kaworu is the only character in the movie who Shinji initiates physical contact with and that speaks to how much Kaworu means to him. This simple gesture, in my opinion, keeps the door open for Kaworu and Shinji to be a couple one day, after Kaworu has found more balance in his life. 

If I were to write an entire essay about Kaworu, it would be titled, “Out of the Coffin: How the Resurrection of Kaworu Nagisa Buries the Tragic Lovers Trope” because this movie truly does just that. 

Another potential love interest for Shinji for many years was Asuka; however, unlike with Kaworu, the nature of this relationship is not left up to interpretation by the end of the movie. Before her big final battle, Asuka tells Shinji, “I think I loved you back then” (regarding their time in middle school) and Shinji, during Instrumentality, tells Asuka, “Thank you for saying you loved me. I loved you too.” It is past tense. 

What does this relationship teach us? It’s a beautiful way of showing that we can love people, and grow and learn, and let go when we no longer fit each other. Letting go is an integral part of life. Whereas other Instrumentality scenes involve touch, Asuka’s, mirroring the ending of End of Evangelion, has a distinct lack of touch. Shinji sits with his arms around his knees and Asuka turns her body away from him. He gives her his thanks and he sends her off to find her peace. Asuka and Shinji teach us that it’s okay to grow out of relationships. You can appreciate what they were to you at the time they happened and move on. 

What about Rei? To be honest with you, this movie is less about Rei’s relationship with Shinji, and more about her relationship with the world. Rei teaches movie viewers about the simple pleasures of living. While Shinji is in mourning for the first quarter of the movie, Rei (as “Sokkuri”) is learning about crop growing and community, the wonder of babies and kittens, the joy of the bath after a long day of fruitful work, and the power of words and picture books. At the end of her life, she only regrets not having more time to spend with the people she loves. In Instrumentality, Shinji accepts her hand when it is offered to him, which I hope signifies he is ready to see life as she had come to during the final movie. 

Rei teaches us that we can love living and to not take our limited time for granted. 

Next, we move on to parent figures: Gendo and Misato. I think they both represent people ill suited to the role, who do the best they can despite it. Gendo, as mentioned for Kaworu above, is a warning about defining yourself by your relationship to another person (Ikari, afterall, is Yui’s name). He is also a lesson in how people mourn and how they can lash out. Misato, like Gendo, felt herself a poor parent, and while mourning the loss of Kaji, she gave up her child to be raised by other people, but, unlike Gendo, went forward to put all her energy into protecting humanity. Both of them reach out to hug Shinji within the movie and he accepts them where they are. 

While I wouldn’t say the movie shows that Shinji forgives Gendo, it does show his making an effort to understand and make peace with what others have done. For Misato, it is fair to say we can still hope for a better future, even when it feels like everything is crumbling around us. Her self-sacrificing love for her son and the whole of humanity is what enables Shinji to then save the people he loves (via the spear of Gaius). 

In the movie, we are also shown friendship. Touji, Hikari, and Kensuke are important members of their community who maintain open communication with those around them and respect others’ boundaries. They are patient and kind and represent the importance of being present. They teach us to meet people where they are and support them how we can, whether it’s giving them a warm meal or giving them space when they need it. 

There are many more characters that could be talked about, but today I am going to end on Mari. Mari’s love is physical. She enjoys being in people’s personal bubbles. She cuddles Asuka and helps trim her hair, she gets into Gendo’s space at college, and at the end of the movie, she reaches out her hand to Shinji to help him stand up from his seat. Upon first glance, some viewers might take Mari and Shinji’s final scene to be romantic, but the reality of it is this: We do not, and cannot, know what kind of love she is meant to represent in his life.

We do not know Mari’s relationship with Shinji because they hardly interact in the movie. She clearly cares about him, but in my opinion, it comes from a place of duty and compassion— Mari was friends with Gendo and Yui. She has been there since he was born. (If we take the manga to be canon, then Mari even had romantic feelings towards his mother. Her hairstyle and glasses are from Yui. At the end of the movie, Mari has changed her hairstyle, which to me implies she has moved on, and “getting” with Shinji would be a thematic break.)

Additionally, their conversation, while flirty, is very much one that implies they haven’t seen each other for a while. Mari is someone who is very physically affectionate. With everyone. If someone ignores that and focuses on the fact she gets into Shinji’s space and claims that’s romantic, they better acknowledge it’s possibly romantic with Asuka, who we see far more intimacy with. When Mari flirts, Shinji flirts back and her initial reaction is surprise, “Wow, you’ve learned to talk back!” Her purpose is clear. She is there to remove the DSS choker from his neck. 

Personally, I love that Mari is the one to close the movie, for the exact reason that we do not know her relationship with Shinji. For Mari to have an assigned role would be to say, “This kind of love is most important,” when the entire movie was spent showing us each love is of equal importance in the balance and building of our lives. (It’s wonderful to see those types of love embodied across the platform from Shinji at the end of the movie: Rei and Kaworu, who, just like in End of Evangelion, could signify the ability to connect with others and be loved.)

If you view Mari as a romantic love interest, then I think it speaks to the value that you as an individual give to romance rather than what the characters themselves are feeling. To me, Mari, the character who was created to “destroy Eva,” is a symbol of all love. When Shinji takes her offered hand and then pulls her to run into the new world, it’s a symbol of balance. The give and take of any kind of relationship. 

We are the product of every relationship we have ever had, from our parents to the people we once loved, from our friendships to any other person we want to stay connected to. Evangelion: 3.0+1.0 Thrice Upon a Time is a story about these relationships. It is a story about love. 

[gopeachllama]

Cuban Cigars and Cardinal Kisses

a.n/: ... ok in my defense, its still nessian month somewhere....

This fic was inspired by the mv of suit & tie by justin timberlake (the source of this AMAZING gif). its honestly one of my favourite mvs of all time. i watched again recently and it just screamed nessian to me so i wrote this. if you wanna get into the vibesTM of the fic then i highly recommend watching the mv before you read it!

reblogs and comment are highly appreciated!

Fandom: A Court Thorns and Rose by Sarah J Maas

Relationship: Nesta Archeron & Cassain

Warnings: Explicit sexual content

Word Count: 5500

Ao3

~~~

Like most other nights at Velaris Lounge, there was already a drink waiting for the man at his arrival. Picked from their finest, and most expensive collection; a finger of Lagavulin’s sixteen years-old single malt scotch whiskey in a crystal tumbler, as so directed by the gentleman. Cassian Khan, six feet and two inches of fine grooming and tailored suit, strode inside through the exclusive entrance way. Liquor in hand, he stood for a moment, lazily scanning the scene before him with deep inhale. He welcomed the soft ambience lighting, the sharp scent of spiced tobacco smoke and the quiet chatter of wealthy men and women overlayed by the sensual drawl of jazz instruments. Cassian’s blood thrummed in time with the low rhythmic thump of the bass. Day light did not reach this place. The place where night – its sole ruler – became something wholly living, pulsating, breathing. This was Cassian’s home. His fucking castle. Sending a roguish smile and a wink to the waitress still standing-by, he headed for his preferred seat by the foot of the stage.

He spotted Rhysand before he sat down. His childhood friend was draped elegantly over his throne of cushioned velvet, one leg crossed over the other, and taking long drags from the joint between his lips. Wicked delight glinted in Rhys’ dark eyes as he watched his friend unbutton his jacket and drop into his own lounge chair across from him. There were no strobe lights directly over the area where they sat; the darkness surrounding Rhys wore him just as finely as his thousand-dollar suit.

Rhys picked up his own, amber-coloured drink and tipped it in Cassian’s direction, “brother,” He greeted. Opaque slivers of smoke curled out and around his teeth and dissolved into the air as he spoke. “Just in time.”

So, it seemed. Their other friend, Azriel, was nowhere to be seen. Cassian’s gestures mirrored Rhys’ as he toasted his friend and took sip from his drink. The liquor ran down his throat, smooth as honey, and he sprawled against the back of his seat. He reached into the inside pocket of his suit jacket and fished out two slim packages, handing one to Rhys and working on the other. Once the plastic wrapping was removed, he brought it to his faced and dragged the length of it under his nose as he inhaled. The aroma of spice and rich wood flooded his senses and he let out a low, satisfied hum. With an eager smirk, Cassian prepared the crisp Cuban Montecristo No.2 with sturdy, brown fingers. When he was done, he raised the lit cigar to his mouth and took a deep breath. Coating his tongue, expanding his lungs, and coursing through his veins, he allowed the heady fumes to fill him. And he came alive.

Cassian scrutinised his companion through the tendrils of smoke as he exhaled, “looking a little eager tonight, Rhys. A special night?”

“Isn’t it always?” Rhys drawled as he watched the sinuous bodies on stage from the corner of his eye.

Cassian couldn’t argue with that. Nights at Velaris Lounge seemed to exist in an entirely different space and time.

Cassian and Rhys’ continued talking, and there was no shortage of subject matters, with Cassian being the head of security for Rhys’ company. They usually avoided mixing work and pleasure, though Rhys’ often proclaimed that both could be the same thing under the right circumstances. Cassian was inclined to agree.

Soon, the conversation was swallowed up by a lull in the music and a dim of the lights. Cassian readied himself by settling further into his chair. The music quickened in tempo, and anticipation charged through air as trumpets beckoned the start of the performance. His arrival was announced through the speakers, in a sweeping, grandiose declaration.

His best friend since childhood, and the remaining member of their trio; Azriel glided onto centre-stage with hard forged confidence. A lit joint in one hand, and a crystal tumbler in the other, Azriel sang. Smoothing, melodic sounds as he moved around the mic stand with loose limbs and an easy smile on his face. It always warmed Cassian, seeing his friend like that. Seeing how he changed when he was on his stage. So different to the man he was outside of this place. To how he used to be. It was a gentle, endearing reminder to Cassian, of their struggles, their triumphs. Of how far they’ve come �� how far he’scome and never looked back.

The bass thrummed, trumpets shrilled, and drums pounded. The timbre of Azriel’s voice streamed effortlessly alongside the various overlaying pitches of the backup singers. The song was all jazzy and funky at the same time, that had Cassian idly tapping his foot in time with the beat. This performance was unfamiliar to his ears. Usually, Azriel made the effort to rehearse his potential performances with his brothers present. And though this wasn’t the first time, it still occurred rarely enough that it had him slightly arching his eyebrows up in surprise.

Before he could think anything more of it, the tempo of the music changed, lowering in pitch and slowing to a steady beat, the rhythmic thump of the bass vibrated the ground at his very feet. The lights flashed before going out completely, blanketing everything under darkness. There was a charge of bated breath in the air, but Cassian was never afraid of the dark. Blood thrummed through his veins in anticipation.

A single spotlight turned on and landed on centre stage. Revealing Azriel’s silent retreat, as if he had melted into the very shadows. But she stood there, in his place. Cassian’s breath hitched at the unfamiliar figure. Burnished gold hair spilling down her back, long legs clad in thigh-high stockings and stiletto heels. And black laced lingerie, covering across her generous breasts, her perky ass, and a garter belt strung around her at the dips of her waist. Piercing steel-grey eyes.

She stood for a breath. One, two, three. And then shemoved.

Cassian catalogued it all. Every flick of her fingers, every sway of her hips, every arch of her back. The gleam of her pearly-white teeth anytime she smiled just wide enough. And Cassian knew, that even when this was all over, she would continue to haunt him every time he closed his eyes.

The pale strobe light casted over her in black and white. Highlighting the curves of her body, with shadows mingling in every dip. The valley of her breast, the ridge down the middle of her toned, flat stomach, the notches of her spine. Cassian felt the phantom press of marble on the tips of his fingers, and they flexed uselessly on the arm of his chair. He wondered if it would feel just as cold if he caressed her unblemished skin. Every now and then, her skin would shimmer; it was beads of moisture that got caught under the spotlight. Perhaps it was droplets of her perfume, that he could smell the barest hints of this close to the stage. Or maybe it was her sweat. Cassian couldn’t tell the difference with the scent. Not that he cared one single bit.

He blinked, and in the next moment, she was on the ground, hands and knees on either side of the turned over mic stand. She dipped low, her cleavage only a breath away from the cool surface of the stage. Then, she reached down her body, and thrusted the mic stand through her splayed open legs. Cassian bit down on an audible groan. She was steel forged in fire and melded under the steady beat of a synth bass drum. It was a brutal, devastating kind of beauty. Cassian may have been a little bit in love. And undeniably rock-fucking-hard in his pants.

In on final turn, she was on her back and propped up on an elbow. Then, so slowly, in time with the bass, much like his own thundering heartbeat, she raised one leg. It stopped for a beat when it was perpendicular to the ground. And she waited, like she knew there was not a single breath being drawn in the room. Like she knew all eyes were latched onto her. The movement was slower, again, when it continued. She stretched herself, and Cassian lost the battle to look away from the thin strip of black lace nestled between her thighs. Her leg eventually rested on her shoulder, held there with a single finger twirled around the heel of her stiletto. The music dropped out completely, and silence consumed the Lounge. The air went heavy, a tangible taste in Cassian’s mouth. And then she tipped her head back, hair flowing to the floor in golden waves, and basking the length of her neck to the single spotlight above. The corners of her mouth curled, oh so slowly. Her cardinal red lips standing out on her pale skin, like blood spilt on pristine marble. She smiled, shamelessly, secretly. The sight of her wide open to the patrons of the Lounge and filthy promise stained on her lips; so debauched, Cassian could hear Rhys shifting in his seat breaking through the silence. He felt the burn in his lungs from the lack of air, but he didn’t dare to move in the slightest. Afraid he would shatter the moment completely. But before Cassian could think to greedily take in every inch of her, the stages plunged into darkness once again. And when light returned, she was gone, and Azriel was there. The mic stand up righted, and a casting knowing smirk. At him.

The music went back to its previous tempo, as strobe lights flashed and soft chatter resumed within the audience. But it was all a dull noise in his ears.

“Who is she?” Cassian sounded a little breathless.

Rhys continued to watch the space she had just vacated. “She showed up a week ago, asking for a job. We told her that we weren’t looking for any new dancers… And she just stripped right there, down to her under-things and started moving. She didn’t even wait for the band,” He turned back to Cassian, and that wicked smile was back in full force, “Az hired her before she even finished her piece.”

“Why didn’t you tell me about her?” There was a slight edge in his voice, but Cassian never got his answer. The music ebbed, cueing the end of Azriel’s performance. As usual, He didn’t linger for the moderate applause. Grabbing a glass of liquor off a tray waiting for him at the base of the stage, he stepped off, and headed straight for his two friends.

“Spectacular as always, Az,” Rhys remarked as Azriel loosened his tie and dropped into the remaining empty seat. Cassian saluted the arrival his friend with a tip of his drink in his direction before upending in one swig and signalling for another one. He pulled out a fresh, new Cuban from his pocket and passed it to Azriel. The latter knowingly took his time. Getting it ready with deft, scarred fingers before finally bringing it up to his lips before, again, taking a slow drag from it. Cassian’s whole body thrummed with question; the words mingled on his tongue along with the sharp aftertaste of expensive whiskey. But Azriel beat him to it.

“So, Cass. How do you like your birthday present?” flicking an eyebrow upwards, he smirked around the cigar propped in the corner of his mouth.

Cassian tensed and waited a moment, carefully choosing his words. “My birthday is in July, jackass.” But Cassian was never the careful type.

Rhys gave a short laughed before replying, “we’ll take that as a thank you.”

“Hello, boys,” A sweet voice came from behind Cassian’s ear. It was once of their long-time waitstaff-turned-dancers. A gorgeous, lithe, little thing. Dressed in sleek, black slacks and a sheer-laced bralette. And even though they smiled politely at both Cassian and Azriel, and placed a new drink in front of the former, Cassian knew the real reason for their appearance.

“Doll,” strobe lights glittered in Rhys’ eyes as he reached for their hand and pressed a kiss onto delicate fingers, “you were absolutely exquisite tonight.”

The dancer melted as they dropped into the space under the man’s arm. And even Cassian marvelled at the way the ambient light made their black skin glow like obsidian.

Azriel sent a soft smile in their direction, “Tarquin,” he greeted with a slight nod. They went to answer, but words were all for naught when Rhys began ghosting his lips along the crook of their neck and shoulder.

Cassian went back to the important matter at hand, “her name?”

Toying with the lace at the edge of Tarquin’s bralette, Rhys didn’t bother to look Cassian’s way as his smile turned feline, “Narcissus.”

He waited for more but when his friend didn’t go to elaborate – more interested with tracing his tongue in the hollow of Tarquin’s collarbone – Azriel did it for him. “It’s an alias, of course. But she had that look in her eyes, you know? Like she was one of us. It didn’t matter to me what her name was.”

Narcissus. The word struck a chord deep within Cassian. And even though he didn’t know her real name, he had to have her. He may go mad if he didn’t. Perhaps he already had. One of the staff girls melted from the shadows and spoked into Azriel’s ear. His gaze shifted to behind Rhys’ head and Cassian followed it with his own to a couple sitting a few tables down from them. She was halfway on her partner’s lap, rubbing idle circles into his splayed thigh and giggling at whatever he was whispering into her hair, while he met Azriel’s stare from the corner of his eye with wicked promise. Azriel’s lips tipped up lazily from one corner when he returned his heavy gaze back to his friends.

“The couple over there would like to express their praises,” He just said.

Cassian scoffed and Rhys waved an idle hand, “I’ll see you in the morning then, brother.”

Azriel stood and drained the rest of his drink before meeting Cassian eye with a slight tug of his mouth and flicking his chin in the general direction of the bar behind him. Cassian jerked his head over his shoulder and scanned the length of the bar. His attention snagged on a familiar small back, and stockings and stiletto clad legs hooked around the leg of a bar stool. He almost lurched from his seat as he looked back to the two men with him. But Azriel was gone. Already at the other table, one hand placed on the man’s shoulder and pressing a kiss onto the woman’s cheek. Tarquin was straddling Rhys. His friend lightly caressed a single finger up and down their spine while his other hand remained draped across the back of the lounge as the pair traded deep kisses that would have been inappropriate in any other public setting. Cassian and his two closest and longest friends; well, they never made the habit of saying goodbye to each other. He left the sitting area and headed for the bar.

Cassian stepped up to the bar just in time to hear a low voice ask the bartender, “scotch. Neat.”

He didn’t miss a beat. “From the finest bottle for the lady. And make it a double.”

The lady did not move to face the newcomer. Only with a slight tip of her chin, she watched him with piercing, unreadable eyes as he watched her. All of her: loose golden hair, long neck, straight back, legs crossed, one hand on her knee. She sat on that bar stool like it was her throne. She wore a slim black dress now, hiding nothing Cassian hadn’t already seen for himself when she was on that stage. He flexed his hand at his side and sent her a cool, suave smile.

“On the house,” he said as he settled into the stool next to the dancer. “For your captivating opening performance at the Lounge.”

When both drinks were handed to them, Cassian tipped his toward the woman and took a generous swig. “I’m-”

“I know who you are. Mister Khan,” she cut him off, luscious lips in a straight line and manicured nails rapping on the bar surface.

Cassian was thankful that he had already sat down, for he would have been rendered to his knees at the mere sound of her voice had he not. It was the slight curl of her tongue, and a curve of her lips, that gave it a breathy, raspy sound. She had a faint accent. French. If Cassian hadn’t already decided to take her to his bed, he most certainly did now. He wanted to know how his name would sound from those sinful lips. He wanted to know what her moans sounded like. Her cries of extasy. Her laugh.

“You are my boss, no?” She asked, peering over the rim of the crystal glass at her mouth.

I am if you want me to be. “Technically.” Along with Rhysand and Azriel, they all own equal shares of Velaris Lounge. “But I prefer the term benefactor.”

There it finally was. A small tug at the corner of her mouth. And Cassian relaxed, satisfied at the sight of it. She eyed the Cuban cigar that was still between Cassian’s fingers. Without any further prompt, he offered the unlit end to her. She took hold of it between two lithe fingers and brought it to her mouth. And Cassian watched in utter reverence. As if the scene unfolded before him in slow motion. Her lips wrapped around the thick end of the cigar. And Cassian’s hand curled hard around the edge of the table. shadows swarmed into the hollow of her cheeks, as she inhaled. And Cassian stopped breathing entirely. Her eyes flashed as she watched him the whole time. As if she could see. Somehow, in the dim, ambient lighting. The cinch in his jaw. The sudden, unbearable tightness in his pants. As if she could hear. Somehow, over the entrancing melody of jazz instruments. The depraved thoughts going through his mind. Of the way he ached to know what her lipstick would look like smudge all over his cock. And then, as if she knew. She curled her lips slightly around the cigar, before removing it from her mouth. Leaving behind a perfect imprint of her cardinal stained lips. Teeth grinding together, Cassian had to physically force down a groan.

Doing anything at all to wade through the thick haze of arousal clouding his mind, he rasped, “so how has the lounge been treating you so far.”

“This place is called the city of dreams, no?” she said, “I never believed that, until I came here. That it could be this simple.”

Cassian couldn’t help the pride that bloomed in his chest. One of us. Azriel had said. “What do you dream of?”

Her eyes wandered behind them to the stage, remained there for a heartbeat, then returned to him. Resolve glinted in them. “To have everything I’ve ever wanted.”

A dangerous smile overtook his features, “well, Velaris is the kind of place where getting everything you want is just the beginning.”

She turned in her seat to fully face him. The slit of her dress shifted in the process, exposing the entire length of her thigh and the laced hem of her thigh-high stockings around it. Cassian’s eyes dropped to it instantly. And like some compulsion, his idle hand went to ghost a single finger over it. She didn’t move away.

“And what is it that you want, mister Khan?” those words ran smooth from her lips, like the expensive scotch she held in her hand.

Cassian wanted to be set ablaze by the heat in her ember eyes.

“I want to know your real name, sweetheart.”

The woman blinked slowly. “Why should I tell you?” she breathed. Her voice now barely over a whisper. The casual glances to his lips occurred far more frequently.

“Because,” Cassian’s words turned heavy as the atmosphere became sharp, like a kindle before a flame, “I need to be able to remind you what it is when I’m fucking you so hard that you won’t remember it.”

If she was flustered at his crude language, she hadn’t shown it. Cassian had no doubt that a woman such as herself was used to receiving such propositions from all kinds of people. She only regarded him; one second, two seconds. Then, her eyelids fluttered, and her lips curved slowly. She smiled; that same secret smile she had given earlier. To no one in particular, on that stage where no one could take their eyes off her. She brought the cigar back to her mouth and took a long drag. The glowing end that illuminated the space between them was nothing compared to the inferno of desire raging within Cassian. Pinning him with an unwavering glaze, she leaned forward, as delicate tendrils of smoke curled around her blood-red lips like silver flames. The last of it danced along Cassian’s cheek when she drew close enough to whisper his damnation.

“Nesta.”

***

The first time he fucked her that night, they barely made it to the couch just beyond the foyer of his penthouse apartment. Cassian took Nesta as she was when he first laid eyes on her. Midnight laced lingerie, garter belt, thigh-high stockings, stilettos, and all. Her dress and coat, and his tie and suit jacket were promptly discarded somewhere by the front door, as he pushed her down on knees and elbows, and pressed her face firmly into the soft, cool surface. Cassian was enthralled, possessed, savaged. And he barely had half the mind to rip open a condom and roll it onto his cock, as he moved aside the damp slit of her panties to reveal a swollen, throbbing cunt. Nesta was ready for him. He had made sure of that when he spent the better part of the drive home with his hand up her dress, as cunning fingers rubbed at her clit over the rough material of her panties. He was pretty sure there would soon be a speeding ticket with his name on it. But he couldn’t bring his self to give a fuck. He only hoped that the image taken by the speeding camera; of Nesta moaning and writhing in the passenger seat of his European sports car, would dissuade the cops from sending it. Cassian wound his hand around the back of Nesta’s garter belt and fisted the other into her hair, as he fucked her in ruthless, powerful thrusts. He came, harder than he ever had in his life. Spilling into the condom inside of her with bruising fingertips and clenched teeth. And Nesta followed not seconds later, with Cassian groaning and uttering filthy fucking promises into her skin.

He fulfilled those promises, just moments later. When Nesta was barely over the throws of her earth-shattering orgasm. Her ruined panties and stilettoes were gone, and her lace bra was push down beneath the curve of her breasts. Her sensitive nipples puckered from the earlier onslaught of Cassian’s tongue and teeth. She mewled at the feeling of the heated skin of her ass pressing onto the cool granite surface when Cassian lifted her onto his dining table. Anticipation pooled in her eyes like molten silver when two rough hands spread her knees wide apart. Cassian never considered himself a religious man. But there was something so unequivocally holy in that moment; Nesta’s gasping and moaning her pleas in abandon, while Cassian knelt and worshipped her flesh. Fingers and tongue worked in expert harmony, as he tasted every inch of her sopping cunt.

When they finally made it to the bed, Nesta was bare down to only her stockings – at Cassian’s adamant insistence. Her soaked panties were left with his thousand-dollar suit; crumpled on the dining area floor. Her bra and garter belt were practically torn off and dumped along the way of their frantic journey to his bedroom. Her long, burnished gold hair was spread generously over his charcoal bed sheets, like golden silk on molten rock. Briefly, Cassian wondered if those lavish strands were long enough to brush against the plush carpet on the floor, while her head was tipped over the edge of his bed, and his hard length plunged deep into her awaiting mouth. Cassian banished the thought instantly, lest their latest coupling end far too soon for his liking. One stocking clad leg was thrown over his shoulder. While the other, was pressed into the memory foam mattress, held down hard by a large, muscled hand. Cassian was drunk on the sight of Nesta like this. She was wholly stretched out by him; beyond anything he has ever attempted before with anyone else. And he silently thanked whatever depraved God watching over them, for her lithe, dancer’s body that could take it, and then some.

The blush that began at her cheeks, slowly made its way down her neck and to her chest. Mascara was smudged around her glazed eyes; faint tracks of it running down her face and into her hairline. The sleek lines of her dark red lipstick were nothing but whispers of what it once was on those beautiful, luscious lips. Perfect, cock-sucking lips. No doubt Cassian would find the rest of it imprinted on his plush, Italian leather couch. At that point in the night, Nesta’s mouth was open in a constant ‘O’ shape. Her pink, wet tongue periodically coming out to tangle with his. She was a sight of pure debauchery. And it was nothing short of a masterpiece. With each powerful thrust, Nesta body jerked with the force of it, her supple breasts bouncing in tandem. And Cassian was hypnotised by the rhythmic movement of her hardened nipples.

Cassian had taken many women to his Californian king-size bed. Beautiful women. Exquisite women. Some of them shy, some of them playful. And most were downright sinful. But Nesta. Nesta, Nesta. Cassian Khan felt like one of the greats. Like fucking Michelangelo, like Sandro Botticelli. Seeing how he was making her writhe beneath him like that; manicured fingers twisted in the bed sheets, arched back, neck bared, skin painted in the soft glow of the spectrum of city lights glittering through the floor to ceiling windows. Seeing how she was open completely, and unyieldingly to him. Taunt flesh rippling under the pearly skin of her flat stomach. Her soddened, swollen cunt, stretched deliciously around his considerable girth. She was priceless renaissance painting that belonged in a museum for the world to see. The Dance of Narcissus, he would call it.

With a guttered groan, Cassian broke through the moans, the pants, and the slick sounds of rock-hard flesh rubbing against soft, wet flesh. “Sweetheart, your pussy is perfect. Like it was made for me.” He couldn’t look away. At Nesta stretched out before him. A precious oasis to a dying, dehydrated man. He would do anything. Give anything – his cock, his time, his money – to keep her coming back to his bed.

“One day, I’m going to fuck you raw. Would you like that, sweetheart?” Nesta could only whimper in response. Which spurred Cassian to go faster, deeper. Harder. “I’ll fuck you so hard. Stuff you so full of my cum, you won’t walk properly for a week.”

Cassian snaked his free hand up her body, fingers caressing over her sensitive skin along the way. He drove it into her hair and gripped harshly onto the strands at the back of her head. “You’ll get up on that stage, and dance for all those filthy-minded men. But it’ll be me dripping out of your tight, little pussy and down your gorgeous legs.”

“Cass!” Nesta cried out. Desperate to touch him, she reached out, digging her sharp nails into his tensed bicep. Cassian welcomed the pain.

“Fuck Nesta. So, fucking perfect for me.” He knew he was close to his release, but he wanted her clenching around him before that. With hard tug of her hair, he made Nesta look him in the eye. Cassian felt the muscles of her thigh trembling at her impending climax beneath the hand that held down her leg to the mattress. “One more time, sweetheart. Come for me, I know you can.”

Nesta shattered around him, just like that. Never taking her eyes from him the entire time, as she gasped and thrashed beneath him. Incoherent words spilt in between each heaved breath. Cassian could only comprehend a word here and there; it was mostly in French. And he didn’t stop. Even as she cried out, begging for reprieve. Begging for more. Cassian pushed her legs even further apart, driving deeper into her limp, pliant body, brushing against places that had never been touched. A bead of sweat rolled down the length of his forehead and nose, before landing in the valley of Nesta’s breasts. Cassian breath stuttered as his cock tightened. And there were barely seconds for him to pull out completely from her over-sensitive flesh. Nesta choked at the sudden loss, but Cassian ignored her muffled protests. In one swift motion, he ripped the condom from his throbbing cock, and pumped the exposed length, once, twice, thrice. And Cassian came undone. He shouted Nesta’s name as ribbons of cum painted her breasts and stomach. Nesta. Nesta. Nesta. He chanted her name over and, and over again. Until he was nothing. Until her name was but an imprint forever in his memory. A promise.

***

They had fucked one more time. Hours later, in the watery, grey light of dawn. Cassian awoke to soft mounds pressed against his back. To tongue and teeth dragging along the stubble on his jawline, and a delicate hand wrapped firmly around his erection. There was nothing separating their skin from head to toe. Nesta’s stocking were nowhere in sight. Not that Cassian cared to look anywhere beyond what was right in front of him at that moment. They shifted in unison, and she straddled him. Somehow, in all their lazy moments, Nesta had already rolled a condom it onto his shaft, while his eyelids were still heavy with sleep. And before he had the chance to touch her, she wordlessly sank onto him, teeth embedded into her bottom lip. Nesta waited, impaled on Cassian’s cock. Adjusting to his sheer size despite already having him twice before. Her flush was gone, but her skin was littered with the evidence of their carnal frenzy from merely hours ago. The first light of day, lit hair up like a golden vail spilling over her shoulders. She was breathtaking, so he told her. But she had not paid attention to his adorations. No, for the first time since they met the previous night. Nesta drank the entirely bare, magnificent sight of him. Her eyes ran over his rich brown skin. Every mountain and valley of muscle in his arms and abdomen. The notch of his throat. The sharp, brutal planes of his face. His molten, hazel eyes. The intricate black lines of ink that spanned his pectorals and biceps.

“Homme exquis.” Nesta murmured softly, as she lifted her hips.

Bodies, supple and hard, moved together. Deeply, and slowly with the rising sun. Chasing any lingering tastes of Cuban cigars and single-malt scotch. Once more. Cassian would want to have her once more, to match the frantic, carnal passion from the previous night. But he restrained himself. Being too content with that moment in the silence of an early morning. With Nesta tracing his tattoo with fingertips and tongue, and Cassian’s nosed buried into her damp hair. She must have showered while he slept. And he was consumed with the scent of him on her. He thought of her using his shampoo, his soap, his towel, and something small and warm burrowed deep within his chest.

They found their releases with each other, Nesta right after Cassian. And when Cassian emerged from his bathroom fifteen minutes later. A towel wrapped low around his sore hips, and tendrils of steam following his steps. Nesta was gone with the final shades of night. But promises of her remained, littered all over his apartment. Stockings draped over the bathroom rack next to a damp towel. A lace bra, hanging off his bedroom doorknob. Black panties laid out on his granite dining table. A garter belt slung over the back of the leather couch stained with cardinal lipstick kisses. Cassian kept them all with a secret smile on his face. Later, when the night would return in all its magnificent beauty. He would put on a fresh, expensive suit. And He would return to his castle. To his friends. To Nesta. And he would do it all over again.

[general9chaos]

Same as last time, you just can't hide this much awesome behind a readmore.

Nickel Propaganda Post

Did you know Tumblr has a 4096-character-per-paragraph limit? I didn't! Whoever submitted this, I love you.

Ok so Nickel is the sole survivor of a genocide that wiped out her entire world. Said genocide was carried out by “organic” aliens (carbon-based, fleshy lifeforms, like us, as opposed to silicon-based, mechanical lifeforms, like the transformers) because of anti-mechanical racism that pervades throughout the galaxy of the Transformers IDW universe. At some point soon after that, Nickel was found by the Decepticon Justice Division — Megatron’s personal kill squad, whose sole purpose is to hunt down, brutally torture, and kill any defectors or traitors to the Decepticon army/cause (or really, anyone who pissed off Megatron enough for him to put them on the DJD’s hit list). And when I say “brutally torture”, I mean prolong the victim’s death in the most creatively cruel, painful ways you could possibly think of, from shoving them feet-first into a meatgrinder, to melting them, to brutal electrocution, to stabbing their face with an iron-maiden-like mask, to literally ripping out their brain and shoving it into their mouth (the victim is still alive, mind you, because they’re robots and their brain remains connected to their spine).

There are five members of the DJD, and each of them specializes in a specific method of torture (and most of them transform into instruments of said torture, like the aforementioned meatgrinder, smelter, and electric chair). The leader, Tarn, even has a superpower that allows him to modulate his voice to match the frequency of his victim’s robot-heartbeat and then induce an excruciatingly painful (fatal) heart attack by gradually lowering his voice until the victim’s heart stops. These guys are absolute monsters. On top of that, they’re all zealots who wholeheartedly believe in the Decepticon Cause, which has gradually gone from aiming to eradicate the caste system and freeing the working class on Cybertron, to wiping out all organic life in the Galaxy and establishing a galactic Decepticon empire. So these guys find Nickel, and wouldn’t ya know, she’s all in on the whole “organic genocide” thing. Plus, the DJD happens to need a medic, and Nickel is one. So she joins them and becomes the den mother to an organized lynch mob. She has absolutely no issue with any of their “activities” and treats them all like her children or grandchildren, scolding them for not taking better care of themselves and admonishing Tarn for bringing her a “smooshed up” organ from a victim because, oh yeah, the main part of her job is now giving Tarn regular organ transplants because he’s addicted to transforming and regularly burns out the organ that allows him to transform. It’s honestly kind of sweet how much Nickel cares about her new sons, when you ignore the whole murder and torture thing.

After the main five members of the DJD are all killed, Nickel becomes the leader of an entire army of Decepticon fundamentalists, who are currently fighting the organics who genocided her planet, but she gets separated from her new army via a series of coincidences and hijinks. This gets her stuck with yet another group of five Decepticons, the Scavengers, but unlike the DJD (who were the best of the best cons), the Scavengers are literally the worst. They’re all basically incompetent, they regularly get mixed up in wacky adventures, and they’re much more interested in hanging out and having fun than carrying out “justice” in the name of the Cause. On top of that, the Scavengers actually had a run-in with the DJD before and only lived to tell the tale because the DJD got called away on a more important mission. When they find out that Nickel used to be part of the DJD and incredulously ask her if she’s trying to apologize or make up for her time with them, she declares that she was proud to be one of them. There’s even a kind of hilarious panel of Nickel watching the Scavengers goofing off, and reminiscing about the DJD.

Through another series of hijinks, Nickel and the Scavengers eventually meet up with the comic’s main cast, a group of Autobots, in the so-called Transformers heaven. However, heaven turns out to actually be a euthanasia clinic for terminally ill patients, where the whole planet is programmed to place patients in a simulation of their greatest fantasy, give them a sense of peace, and then euthanize them. The power source of this massive clinic is a group of organic aliens hooked up to a life support machine, and disconnecting the machine will turn off the simulation and terminate the euthanasia program. Nickel, the Scavengers, and a few of the main cast (the Autobots I mentioned) figure out the nature of the clinic and find the room with the organics on life support, but they have no idea how to end the program. Upon seeing the organics, Nickel immediately turns of their life support and kills them, freeing the main cast from the clinic’s influence. One Autobot, a fellow medic, praises Nickel for figuring out how to free them, and her response heavily implies that no, she didn’t figure it out, she just wanted to kill those organics. However, while the reader can easily see this implication because we know Nickel’s backstory and motivation already, the Autobots have no idea, so they welcome Nickel and the Scavengers into their crew. Then, near the climax of the whole series, Nickel saves the day by killing a god (it’s a really, really long story). The last time we see her, she’s basically riding off into the sunset with the Scavengers to go on more adventures.

Nickel Propaganda Post

Did you know Tumblr has a 4096-character-per-paragraph limit? I didn't! Whoever submitted this, I love you.

Ok so Nickel is the sole survivor of a genocide that wiped out her entire world. Said genocide was carried out by “organic” aliens (carbon-based, fleshy lifeforms, like us, as opposed to silicon-based, mechanical lifeforms, like the transformers) because of anti-mechanical racism that pervades throughout the galaxy of the Transformers IDW universe. At some point soon after that, Nickel was found by the Decepticon Justice Division — Megatron’s personal kill squad, whose sole purpose is to hunt down, brutally torture, and kill any defectors or traitors to the Decepticon army/cause (or really, anyone who pissed off Megatron enough for him to put them on the DJD’s hit list). And when I say “brutally torture”, I mean prolong the victim’s death in the most creatively cruel, painful ways you could possibly think of, from shoving them feet-first into a meatgrinder, to melting them, to brutal electrocution, to stabbing their face with an iron-maiden-like mask, to literally ripping out their brain and shoving it into their mouth (the victim is still alive, mind you, because they’re robots and their brain remains connected to their spine).

There are five members of the DJD, and each of them specializes in a specific method of torture (and most of them transform into instruments of said torture, like the aforementioned meatgrinder, smelter, and electric chair). The leader, Tarn, even has a superpower that allows him to modulate his voice to match the frequency of his victim’s robot-heartbeat and then induce an excruciatingly painful (fatal) heart attack by gradually lowering his voice until the victim’s heart stops. These guys are absolute monsters. On top of that, they’re all zealots who wholeheartedly believe in the Decepticon Cause, which has gradually gone from aiming to eradicate the caste system and freeing the working class on Cybertron, to wiping out all organic life in the Galaxy and establishing a galactic Decepticon empire. So these guys find Nickel, and wouldn’t ya know, she’s all in on the whole “organic genocide” thing. Plus, the DJD happens to need a medic, and Nickel is one. So she joins them and becomes the den mother to an organized lynch mob. She has absolutely no issue with any of their “activities” and treats them all like her children or grandchildren, scolding them for not taking better care of themselves and admonishing Tarn for bringing her a “smooshed up” organ from a victim because, oh yeah, the main part of her job is now giving Tarn regular organ transplants because he’s addicted to transforming and regularly burns out the organ that allows him to transform. It’s honestly kind of sweet how much Nickel cares about her new sons, when you ignore the whole murder and torture thing.

After the main five members of the DJD are all killed, Nickel becomes the leader of an entire army of Decepticon fundamentalists, who are currently fighting the organics who genocided her planet, but she gets separated from her new army via a series of coincidences and hijinks. This gets her stuck with yet another group of five Decepticons, the Scavengers, but unlike the DJD (who were the best of the best cons), the Scavengers are literally the worst. They’re all basically incompetent, they regularly get mixed up in wacky adventures, and they’re much more interested in hanging out and having fun than carrying out “justice” in the name of the Cause. On top of that, the Scavengers actually had a run-in with the DJD before and only lived to tell the tale because the DJD got called away on a more important mission. When they find out that Nickel used to be part of the DJD and incredulously ask her if she’s trying to apologize or make up for her time with them, she declares that she was proud to be one of them. There’s even a kind of hilarious panel of Nickel watching the Scavengers goofing off, and reminiscing about the DJD.

Through another series of hijinks, Nickel and the Scavengers eventually meet up with the comic’s main cast, a group of Autobots, in the so-called Transformers heaven. However, heaven turns out to actually be a euthanasia clinic for terminally ill patients, where the whole planet is programmed to place patients in a simulation of their greatest fantasy, give them a sense of peace, and then euthanize them. The power source of this massive clinic is a group of organic aliens hooked up to a life support machine, and disconnecting the machine will turn off the simulation and terminate the euthanasia program. Nickel, the Scavengers, and a few of the main cast (the Autobots I mentioned) figure out the nature of the clinic and find the room with the organics on life support, but they have no idea how to end the program. Upon seeing the organics, Nickel immediately turns of their life support and kills them, freeing the main cast from the clinic’s influence. One Autobot, a fellow medic, praises Nickel for figuring out how to free them, and her response heavily implies that no, she didn’t figure it out, she just wanted to kill those organics. However, while the reader can easily see this implication because we know Nickel’s backstory and motivation already, the Autobots have no idea, so they welcome Nickel and the Scavengers into their crew. Then, near the climax of the whole series, Nickel saves the day by killing a god (it’s a really, really long story). The last time we see her, she’s basically riding off into the sunset with the Scavengers to go on more adventures.

[testudoaubrei-blog]

“I’m loyal, that’s my whole thing.” - Scorpia, Season 4 Episode 6, Princess Scorpia

“Everything they taught us in the Horde about loyalty is meaningless” - Lonnie, Season 4 Episode 5, Protocol

Rewatching Season 4, I just finished Princess Scorpia. This is an episode that has always stuck with me, especially the A plot of Scorpia realizing how badly Catra has treated her and everyone else and deciding to leave. One thing I’ve been thinking about since I finished the series, though, is what this episode is telling us on a larger level. Looking beyond the character arcs and more at this show’s larger themes and message. Because this show is very much a show that says things, made by people who believe them. That earnestness and depth is one reason I keep coming back to it.

In the pull-quote above, and throughout the episode and before it, Scorpia defines herself in terms of loyalty. It is her identity - as she says, that’s what Scorpions do, they’re loyal. Her actions for three and a half seasons bear this out. When she first shows up, she tries to position herself as Catra’s new best friend, the one who won’t leave her and will stick by her no matter what. And that’s what she does, until this episode. She sticks by Catra through Catra’s increasingly villainous plots and erratic behavior. But she doesn’t just stick around. Until the portal, she barely contradicts Catra, and even afterwards, does so only furtively and immediately backs away as soon as Catra pushes back. For more than a year of show time, Scorpia has not just stood by Catra, or supported her, she’s actively assisted her in her most villainous and destructive acts. Scorpia is fighting by Catra’s side, eagerly carrying out her orders, and doing her utmost to see that Catra succeeds. But her loyalty goes beyond this practical help. Because for all that Catra loudly declares that she doesn’t need a new best friend, she consistently seeks out connection throughout the show, even when she’s at her most isolated in season 4. She needs moral support, and connection, and to know that she isn’t alone. Scorpia provides that, and keeps Catra going. Though Scropia isn’t initiating Catra’s various misdeeds, she’s assisting and supporting Catra throughout. On a personal, psychological level, the only word that seems adequate for this is ‘ennabling’ - Scorpia, sweet as she is, is Catra’s enabler. We see in the next few episodes what happens when Catra doesn’t have Scorpia’s support - she breaks down, and realizes that her actions really do have consequences, and that the affection she took for granted for so many years is something she can’t live without. But as long as Scorpia’s still around, Catra can’t make that realization.

Now I’m not going to say that Scorpia is morally culpable for Catra’s own actions. She’s not. Catra is solely responsible for her various betrayals, manipulations, violent outbursts and assorted murder attempts against...most of the rest of the cast (though being raised by Shadow Weaver sure as shit is a mitigating factor). But while Catra is obviously being a bad friend to Scorpia throughout, Scorpia isn’t actually being as supportive or helpful to Catra as she thinks, because Catra doesn’t actually need unconditional support, she needs people to be honest with her and express to her how she’s hurting them. She needs people who will stand up for themselves just as she needs to take responsibility for her own actions. This is part of why she and Adora have such a healthy dynamic in season 5 - Adora doesn’t take her crap, and Catra takes responsibility for her crap.

However, Scorpia -is- responsible for her own actions. And as I said above, she’s been with Catra every step of the way as Catra has attacked just about everyone and made war on Etheria. On a larger, political level, Scorpia is a willing participant in upholding the Horde’s oppressive system, and executing a war of aggression and colonization against innocent people. Speaking of colonization, perversely, she’s loyal to the very organization that dispossessed her and literally stole her birthright, then discarded it like a useless trinket when it was no longer useful to them. No one ever suggests ‘why don’t we let Scorpia connect with ~her runestone~’ until Glimmer does (and Glimmer’s motivations and arguments aren’t exactly forthright). Scorpia’s loyalty makes her an accomplice in her own oppression (like a bunch of the themes in this show there’s some interesting post-colonial stuff that the show doesn’t fully explore, probably because Noelle and the crew felt self-conscious about telling a post colonial story, or just didn’t know where to go with it). Interestingly, Scorpia’s loyalty to the Horde here parallels her loyalty to Catra, which has made her completely disregard her own wellbeing, which is the most obvious take away from the episode.

But I would argue that everything above shows that for Scorpia loyalty has been a way of avoiding developing her own moral compass. Scorpia repeatedly shoves aside questions of right or wrong in favor of being loyal to her friends and to the Horde. Loyalty has made Scorpia not only willing to accept her own mistreatment, but to willingly mistreat others, and to keep herself from asking any hard questions about what she’s doing or why. This is despite the fact that Scorpia is, by inclination, an incredibly gentle, kind and compassionate person. She’s willing to silence the best parts of her nature out of loyalty to Catra and the Horde. In the end, she also commits acts of violence and perpetuates the oppression of Etheria. And this is so insightful, because we see this sort of thing in our world all the time. So many oppressive institutions depend upon the loyalty of their members to keep them ‘just following orders’; so many abusive systems depend upon loyalty to stifle dissent and silence potential whistleblowers before they even speak. We see this in some of the most oppressive institutions and the worst scandals in our own society, and looking back through human history we see it in some of our nation’s and our species' most infamous crimes.

And when we look at the Horde as a system that Hordak has built in imitation of his elder brother’s empire, we see just how central loyalty is an ethos. Hordak himself is motivated entirely by loyalty to Prime - being a former clone, he spends the entire series not fully capable of accepting himself as an autonomous being (even when he acts like one and enjoys it, there’s some fucked up religious shit there that I won’t get into). He seems to have instilled this in his followers. The Horde Trio, Catra and Scorpia all hold loyalty as one of their highest values. Catra clings to it as her biggest accusation against Adora - that she was disloyal, as expressed in Catra’s perception that Adora broke her promise and abandoned her. Loyalty keeps the Horde Trio together and fighting for the Horde, and Scorpia with Catra. I think we can read between the lines and say the Horde runs on loyalty (as well as fear) and this is a very insightful portrayal of oppressive military and paramilitary institutions like armies of conquest and occupation and other instruments of state violence.

There’s another, related way of looking at how a sole reliance on loyalty as a moral framework has stunted Scorpia’s moral growth, and I think that brings together both the ways that it makes Scorpia willing to accept her mistreatment and participate in the mistreatment of others. Namely, loyalty in the Horde style isn’t just sticking with someone or something, but subsuming your own will into theirs. Following orders. Supporting your friend in what they do no matter what. Whatever you call it, it’s about turning off your own self - your self preservation, your self respect, your conscience, whatever other things you value - and just going along with what the person or institution you are loyal to wants you to do. And this is where Horde loyalty goes full circle, back to its origin - Horde Prime, the narcissistic self-made god who wishes to control or destroy everything that is not himself. Loyalty as Hordak conceived of it and as the Horde believes in it is a reflection of Prime's absolute control over all his domain.

In a way, self-determination is one of this show’s highest values (together with love). It’s at the heart of Adora’s 5-season, 3 year struggle to become her own woman and her own hero as she shrugs off one imposed destiny and then another and finally embraces what she wants. In a more negative form, it’s at the heart of Catra’s arc, as she finally accepts responsibility for her own actions and their consequences and starts working to make a world that she actually wants to live in, as well as admit to herself that what she really wants is love. And I could go on. This self-determination is existentially, obviously threatened by Prime chipping people, but it is also stunted by horde-style loyalty that demands unquestioning support and obedience.

Both the Horde Trio and Scorpia reject the Horde’s ideal of loyalty and walk away, but I think it’s interesting how they do it. Neither rejects loyalty entirely (not on the way Adora does) - the Trio, realistically, remain loyal to each other and simply walk away and walk out of the war (this might save their lives), joining the other disillusioned cynics in the Crimson Wastes. They reject loyalty to the horde and embrace a more supportive and respectful form of loyalty to each other. Scorpia leaves, but she actually comes to her crisis and makes her decision out of loyalty, and because it’s clear that her loyalty isn’t returned. The immediate situation - loyalty to Emily and Entrapta’s memory on one hand and Catra’s orders on the others - creates the conflict between loyalties that forces Scorpia to actually make her own choice rather than deferring to Catra. But she also reflects how Catra betrayed her loyalty to Entrapta, and thus how all of her friends’ loyalty to Catra is not returned.This is another point about horde-style loyalty - it’s one way - Hordak or Catra will demand your loyalty, but they feel no obligation to return it, which reflects Prime’s view of every other being in the universe as disposable. It’s only when she’s with the Princesses that Scorpia starts to find a new moral center, though sticking up for and protecting her friends remains important to her. In neither case, though, are these kinds of loyalty coming at the cost of either the Trio or Scorpia’s autonomy or ability to make moral choices of their own. In the very next episode, she says she wants to 'be A good friend' which is how the Princesses typically describe sticking together, which is a much more active and holistic concept than 'loyalty'. Scorpia confesses that she doesn't even know how, but she wants to learn and thinks the princesses can teach her.

There's another interesting counterexample to Horde Loyalty. Adora repeatedly breaks with the people around her to do what is right. First she leaves the Horde, then walks away from Catra by stages when it is clear that Catra is going to continue to harm other people and Etheria. Then she walks away from Glimmer, defies Light Hope and breaks loyalty with her supposed destiny and purposes as well as loyalty to the homelans she has never known. By season 5, Adora is loyal only to herself and the people she cares about, but she isn't constraining her will to anyone else's. For all that she seems like a rule follower Adora has a rebellious streak a mile wide, and she will do what is right, no matter what. This is what allows her to save the universe 3 times.

So the show’s argument is that loyalty is not a good moral framework to base all of our actions around. I don’t think it goes so far as saying that loyalty has no place in our ethics (being a good friend, which is such a huge part of the show, certainly includes loyalty, especially sticking with people when the going gets tough), but the show stresses time and again that being loyal to something or someone shouldn’t make you disregard yourself and what you think is right. Because it’s only by living out our own values and taking responsibility for our own actions that we can come into our own as moral beings. Moreover, if we insist on maintaining loyalty to institutions that oppress us and others, we can’t dismantle the systems of oppression that are holding us and other people down. (Yes, this is a pretty radical message, but I suspect that Noelle is some kind of anarchist? Anyway, it’s a thing.)

Okay, so that’s what I, a 35 year old, get from this kids show. I think it’s also worth pointing out that this lesson applies to younger viewers too, in their most immediate lives. Younger viewers will have had friends who didn’t treat them well, or might not have treated other people well, and who might have pressured them into participating in the mistreatment of others (this is kind of how bullying works a lot of the time). I think it’s important that younger viewers see how being a good friend never means disrespecting yourself or other people and it means a lot to me that She-Ra shows this in such a nuanced and realistic way.

[anime-grimmy-art]

Told you guys I’d ramble in due time.

I absolutely adore Bravely Default 2. It came at a really bad time cos I can’t waste 70 hours on a jrpg, but well, it’s too late to be concerned about that now. And as is tradition with me obsessing over a new game / show / whatever, you’ll basically find a fullblown review disguised as ramblings right under the cut. Be aware that I’m gonna talk about EVERYTHING, so spoilers are a given. Some maybe even for the previous Bravely Default games.

Also, if you wanna talk about this game in any capacity, hit me up, I’m DESPERATE to talk more about it.

Just for reference on how long this is gonna be, I made a voice recording while driving to remember all the points I wanna make, and that recording is almost 2 hours long. I did cut it down but still, this is gonna be a lot.

I’ll start off with the things that actually bugged me about the game, since there are only 3 things that really bothered me. First of, I really don’t like that you can name Seth. He has too much personality to be a self insert and player integration is not that big of a part in the game that this decision can be justified. It wouldn’t bother me that much if it didn’t leave a bad mark on the ending. First of all, we were robbed of Gloria desperately shouting for Seth, which makes the impact work less, and it’s just so prevalent that the name can’t be said because you have all the normal sound design going. If they’d just let the credits still play I wouldn’t have batted an eye, but because every other sound comes in it’s so obvious they’re just silently shouting in this scene, which makes it look silly. Like I said, this decision is more a detriment than an addition, and it’s a shame it casts a shadow on an otherwise heartfelt ending.

Speaking about lost potential, the other thing that really bothers me is the lost potential in certain plot points and character conclusions. I mainly mean Adam and Edna here. Both of them have been built up to be these formidable foes but they just, die. If it was just Adam I’d be fine with it, since you expect Edna to backstab him and be the actual big bad of the story, but I cannot fathom why they dropped Edna this HARD. If not Edna herself, I don’t understand why we don’t get more of a reaction from the Fairies and especially Adelle. I mean, Edna was her sole reason she left for her journey in the first place, then Edna dies and that’s it? No part where she grieves for a second? No concern from the others about Adelle? Mind you, I haven’t finished all the Sidequests, so maybe there actually is one in which this is addressed, but I think even just a Party Chat after Bad End 1 would have been sufficient to show how Adelle suddenly feels about the loss of Edna. It would have made Bad End 2 / The Secret Ending even more impactful, because, yeah, of course, you kinda know Adelle isn’t going to turn her back on fairy kind, but one of the reasons she doesn’t leave is because if Enda didn’t get a happy ending, then she shouldn’t either. It would have been amazing foreshadowing if she showed this sentiment before this scene happened. Other than that, it’s a shame that we know so little about Edna, or rather, how she became “bad”. I get she’s supposed to be corrupted by the Night’s Nexus, but how did it even come to this? It can’t have been a gradual thing, after all, Adelle says Edna was always good natured and then just disappeared one day. Really would have loved seeing more of that plot point.

Ok, last gripe I have, some choices in the soundtrack and sound design. Don’t get me wrong, I absolutely love the OST, and I will get to that, but damn, whatever Revo used for the lead instrument in Wiswald hurts my ears. It’s a really good track, but I always have to turn down my volume because these high pitched sounds physically hurt. And for sound design. Dude, the Night’s Nexus is the least threatening, nightmare fueled abomination that ever existed. I get that its growl is kinda supposed to be layered with Edna’s or sth, but it, it just sounds silly. If they went the route of just swinging between different voices or began distorting it from phase to phase, it would have been fine. But the choice they made really made an otherwise creepy design just absolutely silly.

Ok, enough jammering, on to the good stuff. Like I said, there’s going to be a lot, so I’ll try to be brief in each aspect.

Gameplay

I honestly like the new battle mechanics more than the old ones. This individual, turn based system feels way more dynamic and it’s easier to strategies in battles. Because nothing made me more angry than setting up for a heal and the enemy suddenly being faster than me and killing my healer. Now it’s easier to plan ahead a bit.

I also found myself experimenting more with the jobs. Not sure what it really is, but none of the party members leaning more towards certain types of jobs and the job leveling being way faster probably helped.

And I know some people get up in arms because the boss sometimes can be a real pain in the ass (looking at you pope dude), I still found it very interesting getting around counters or even using these counters as a benefit. As an example, I made Adelle my main physical fighter and gave her lots of counter abilities to help her profit from being countered by enemies themselves. Now, she can attack enemies, get countered, automatically evade that counter and earn a BP at the same time. Made a lot of boss fights way easier and fun to exploit.

Music

Ok, I will try my best to be really, really brief, because in my recording this part takes up almost 40 minutes. Anyways, Revo might have just become one of my absolute favorite composers ever. I don’t know what kind of magic he used, but I initially wasn’t that impressed with the OST, but every time I listened to it, I just fell in love harder and harder. Before getting into specifics, I wanna highlight the two things that made me love this OST overall. First of all, this soundtrack almost seems like a refinement of BD’s. While losing some of that fairytale vibe, it sounds even more fantasy now. And in contrast to the original, this almost sounds more balanced? Like, BD’s OST felt high energy throughout, BD2’s on the other hand manages to find a good balance between high and low energy pieces. Like, the character themes or battle themes are absolute hype, but the overworld themes are a lot calmer and easier to listen to while exploring. Second big point that makes this soundtrack amazing is that Revo is an absolute god at using emotional progression/storytelling and leitmotifs in his songs. And heck, do I love myself my leitmotifs. You’ve got some obvious ones, like the final battle theme in which all the character themes and other leitmotifs are integrated. Then you got some maybe more subtle once, just like how the overworld themes are just the main theme, just a lot calmer and using the lead instruments of the towns of the areas.

But my absolute favourites gotta be the character themes and the main theme. I love how fitting the themes for the characters are and in general, each of them is such a bop. At first I prefered Elvis’, because I sure am a sucker for jazzy vibes, but over time Adelle’s became my fav. It’s just something about the trumpets, and how the theme almost sounds a bit melancholic and bittersweet, that drew me in. And considering her story, mostly her bad end, that the bittersweet tone really fits.

Then there’s the main theme. Just like BD’s it shouts “triumphant anthem” and it definitely gives you a very familiar vibe, but I’d argue it has even better emotional progression. Heck, the first time I heard the music start up in the reveal trailer, I didn’t have to look at the screen to know this is gonna be a BD game. Also, the credit song version had me weeping at the true end. I’m someone who’s very easily affected by music (if me shouting about soundtracks on this blog wasn’t proof enough) and just hearing that ending song, getting the after credits scene, just for the second credits to start as a freaking duet. Dude, at that point I just started sobbing, I’m not gonna lie. Just this little part showed how much Revo knows how to put emotion in a song and also write it in such a way that he can elicit strong, emotional reactions from you too. 

Story

People have been complaining how the story is too boring and kinda disappointing in comparison to the last one, but I just think the games tried to accomplish different things here. Since the BD series is a celebration of old, classic jrpgs, “cliche” storytelling is a given. Though, BD did throw a lot of meta stuff in there too. BD2 in contrast just feels like a direct execution of that initial idea. It feels familiar, it feels comfy and it feels safe. Except for the little things with the endings and then overwriting the Nexus’ “save file”, BD2 doesn’t really get that meta, which is totally fine. It doesn’t try to reinvent or innovate anything, it just wants to be a fantasy story, that might be cliche, but still fun and enjoyable in its own right.

I’d also argue that the pacing is a lot better than the old game, because with BD I sometimes found myself skipping through scenes to get on with the story. Not that this game didn’t have me rushing through stuff as well, but I found it kept my intrigue way better than the original.

Characters

Next to the music, this is the part that I absolutely love the most. While, yes, they did lose a lot of potential with some characters, mostly with the villains, the main cast is just so much fun. I love these 4 dorks so, so much.

I honestly can’t stand how much people compare them to the original cast. Yes, ofc, I’ve been doing my fair share of comparisons too, but calling these four a more boring version of BD’s party physically hurts me. Because except for some initial impressions, the Heroes of Light are completely different from our beloved Warriors of Light.

While yes, Seth and Gloria give off strong Tiz and Agnes vibes at first, they both grow into such different characters that they’re not really comparable. I think this shows with Adelle and Elvis even more. I do understand how people could compare Adelle and Edea, since they’re both the feisty girl type, but I can’t understand how people can see Ringabel and Elvis as the same character type. While those two are the “suave” party members, they act so differently from another. And that’s honestly apparent the first time you meet them. 

Anyways, I love these 4 so much.

We technically don’t know a lot about Seth at all, but they manage to pull so much out of just the fact that he’s a sailor, that it makes him really endearing, really fast.

I was kinda disinterested with Gloria at first, because again, the initial impression was Agnés2.0, but she grew on me a lot. Gloria is way more hard headed and honestly sassy in comparison to Agnés and I absolutely adore it.

Elvis. Elvis, my man. I love this fantasy scottosh wizard so, so much. He’s such a ridiculous character but so endearing at the same time. You got all this dorkiness, with him setting himself on fire as a student, him doing god knows what for a good drink or just laughing danger and prejudice in the face. But then you got his super empathetic and caring side. Mind you, most of his wise moments come from quoting Lady Emma, but still, as much as he’s hopeless with certain social situations, he’s actually still really good at reading the room and playing things smart. He’s a smart and powerful idiot, which makes him a danger to everyone and himself, and I love him for it. (I also can’t believe they called him Lesley I MEAN COME ON)

And then there’s Adelle. I liked her from the start, but I didn’t think she would stick out to me. I think now she’s my favourite character. Not even talking about all the stuff that happens in chapter 3 and onward, because these story threads are awesome in their own right, but there’s just something about her personality that’s interesting and appealing to me. Like I said, I’m not surprised people compare her to Edea, I did too at first, but while Edea walks very close to the line of a Tsundere, I was really surprised that Adelle is, well, not a Tsundere at all. Yeah, of course she’s putting Elvis down a lot, but that stems more from her preventing his ego from going to his head than her being all embarrassed. No, Adelle is actually really well adjusted when it comes to communication. While it’s hilarious that she and Elvis met with her chucking her shoes at him, the two just got along well right from the start. Adelle in general has this really open and helpful personality, but also doesn’t shy away from putting her foot down, even if that sometimes comes out as an embarrassed sputter. She’s also the mother hen of the group. She looks out for the other three and gets concerned about them real fast. 

I dunno, Adelle just really grew on me over the course of this game, and then her kinda being paired with Elvis too, as partners and as partners, makes me like her even more. Because as much as I like their personalities individually, I like their character dynamic even more. I honestly love the relationships between all four of them a lot. You really feel them grow closer as friends and all the little character sidequests just always made me really happy.

Conclusion

You might not believe me, but I really held back there. This could probably have been 3 times its length. As much as I love this game, it’s of course not perfect. It struggles and flails in some parts a lot and it certainly has some aspects that might turn people off. But for me, it was just a very familiar and comfy game that didn’t necessarily deliver anything new, but that told its story in such a way that it still got me excited to keep going. The soundtrack is absolutely amazing and the conclusion of the story actually got me to cry. While not groundbreaking, this game is highly enjoyable and leaves you absolutely satisfied at the end.

Also, I would like to iterate that I am desperate to get more content about this game, so if you wanna chat about it, hit me up.

Anyways, anyone else felt like having a fever dream when everybody in chapter 2 started talking fantasy scottish? Cos I sure did.

[thepriceofbeingaroseisloneliness]

               『朧』Commemorative release event  【Toshiya】  2021.7.25

                                           Translation&Notes  Part-1

Notes before reading: This is 1st part of the translation/notes of the Toshiya solo online event for the release of “Oboro” streamed on 25th July.  This part is aprox the first 18-20 min of the 45 min total of the talk. 

Feel free to correct me if you spot any mistakes or any confusing parts. Links or credits to this post when the content is reposted or captured in other SNS is appreciated ------

Part 1 

Higuchi Yasuyuki : Hello everyone, this is Toshiya’s Oboro Release Commemorative Event….thank you for watching us….I’m Higuchi Yasuyuki *to Toshiya* Thank you for being here….

Toshiya: Thank you for having me….

H: How is it going?

Toshiya: It’s hot, isn’t it?

H: It is….for real….I want to drink a beer….

Toshiya: That’s right…something very cold and light,right?….

H. says that comments are already appearing on the screen so, they are going to proceed with the talk little by little (he means  people are already watching, as they are already commenting)

H: I met you last year in person because of an article for a magazine *Toshiya nods* We took several pictures and so…. T: Yes, it was for [PHY], right? *Toshiya’s interview featured in PHY【ファイ】VOL.14, you can read it here* H: Yes, that’s it.  After that, unexpectedly, Corona happened and I have interviewed you several times remotely. T: That’s right. H: Are you doing well? T: Yes, I’m doing well…. H: Did something change about your physical condition/health? T: My physical condition…. somehow…. I’d say I lost some weight…. H: Did you lose weight? How? T: I did nothing at all, it was naturally… H: Naturally? Losing weight naturally…. I’m jealous…. T: Well…. somehow…. due to the state of emergency declaration…. I couldn’t go to the gym…. I guess I lost some weight because of that…. H: Because you are losing muscle mass…. T: Maybe I lost some…. Like, somehow, I became a mere shadow of myself *laughs* H: You are burning out…but usually if you don't go to the gym, you will naturally gain weight, right? T: Well, somehow because of the muscle mass loss, I lost weight…. H: I’m jealous of your physical constitution… T: If I don’t go to the gym, I will lose weight…. H: I’m still jealous though…. that’s it….so, this event  will be like a talk event, just like the one we had more or less a year ago… T: Yes, at that place…. H: At Minatomirai…. T: In Yokohama…. H:  The five of you were men in black*…. *This might be a reference to “ Detective Conan“, a Japanese manga series, in which  the primary antagonists of the series is a crime syndicate called the Black Organization. T: It was like   it was the first time that the five of us were in a situation like that... talking on the spot face to face…..*smiles* H: *sighs* It was hell…. T: *laughs* Wasn’t it? H: You were really nervous…. T: Dir en grey can’t talk when the five of us get together….

H: Since when does it feel that way? T: I wonder since when…. I don’t know that… H: But it wasn’t like that from the beginning…. T: But I don’t feel we were that talkative either…. more like…. it’s moments of “who is going to talk first”, “no one is talking now” going on…. H: It’s like you are probing each other…. like” you, talk!”, the atmosphere/mood is amazing…. *laughs* T: *Laughs* It’s like that…. H: Like you don’t answer anything unless you are addressed by your name…. T: It’s like that, it’s like that…. it’s true…. H: I wonder if these five people have meetings in the same way…. T: When it comes to who is going to talk or not, I’m just like “no” …..I feel like relying on others for that…. H: But it’s a band that has been around for a long time, still you all are like “who is going to talk first”…. T: That’s true…it’s like, if someone wants to talk, I’m sure they are going to talk if  they want to….those who want to talk, will talk….

H: Is there any occasion with the members in which you have talked face to face for a long time?  More or less recent…. T: I have no memory of that….*laughs* Higuchi burst into laugh. T: I have no memory of that…. H: That’s amazing… T: That’s right…. it’s amazing…. H: It would be troublesome if suddenly, you are forcibly in such a situation…. T: It would be….it would be troublesome…like…that’s impossible…. H: Impossible *laughs* T: That’s right….I can’t see it happening… H: You can’t…..someday, I would like to do something like that…. T: No way… H: *Laughs* It’s been a year since that event, it’s been already a year but, what kind of things you have been doing?  Do you remember? What were you doing? T: Now I’m solely making songs…I did preproduction stuff….what else?....when there was a live….or more like, when a live was scheduled we did rehearsals….the lives couldn’t be held but we did rehearsals for them… H: Then, it’s like you were preparing yourself for those activities….. T: It was like “let’s put my efforts into something” all the time…. H: It doesn’t seem like it was hard for you to keep being motivated…. T: Until we did the recording of the Rock-May-Kan GIG, nothing changed in me. I was so surprised/shocked because of that…. H: At the time of the Rock-May-Kan GIG…. T: At that time, I feel for the first time a sense of crisis…. that if it keeps going like this, I will not be able to express the things I wanted to. H: It was like a growth/revelation…. T: That’s it…. H: You got a different perspective… T: That’s it…for me….of course I was playing a live….it’s like the mental image of working in bringing together all the feelings into that environment but…. then, among that,  as there are also parts in which I’m rather a person that expresses themselves than a bassist, in my mind, I’m holding an instrument called “bass”, it’s a bass but I have to play without being trapped by it….

H: You mean not being limited by it…. T: I’m very conscious of that…. that’s right….Both of my hands are blocked/occupied but there (at a live), a way of expression is created by myself. I wonder myself if it is this way. For example, people who attended lives told me they had their eyes drawn towards something. I wonder if it is really like that. Like, an atmosphere that it’s created when I’m playing bass. I wonder if they can perceive that because I can express those things…. That kind of power of expression. Even if I did it (at  Rock-May-Kan GIG) as nothing changed, I didn’t feel that….somehow, it’s natural that it feels this way, I thought at the moment “this is bad/problematic) H: However, it was good that you could do a live (with audience) after that…. T: Of course, of course…that’s right, but isn’t being able to do lives something common/natural? Shouldn’t it be the norm? H: Last year around this time, it was the event at Minatomirai, you looked happy with the idea of staying at home…. T: Even now I’m comfortable with that idea…. *they both laugh* I’m pleased with being at home… H: Are you basically mostly at home? Do you like that? T: No, that’s not the case. Somehow, I wonder if I prefer to be at home and have a fun private life….I wonder if I like being at home to have that fun private life…. H: I’m not sure of what the fans think about this but for me, among the five members, the person whose private life is the most mysterious is yours. Things like “in what position does he watch television?” …. T: *Laughs* I see… H: Or “What kind of clothes does he wear when he goes to sleep?”….I can imagine that about the other members but I don’t feel that your daily life is the one I can’t imagine the most.... T: Well, it’s a normal one, just that…..if you all are interested…. H: I’m interested! T: Things I did or say are quite uninteresting but there are many….that are easy to be used to make conversation…. H: I want to make conversation…. T: It’s ok, I’m grateful *laughs* H: Then it’s not like you don’t go out so much…. T: Of course, I have a very normal daily life…. H: Especially now because of Corona…. T: But I go often want to go out for a walk…. H: *surprised* Eh? for a walk? Do you go for a walk like this?*points at him* T: *drinks water* Mmm, well I go for a walk…. H: Don’t you stand out? T: No, not much.  Like no one speaks to me… H: Relatively, you don’t have the feeling of that (of standing out) …. T: *Laughs* There is no sign of that…. H: What are you saying? *laughs* … You don’t feel like that at all….you go on a normal walk… T: I do….

H: Do you have any specific timing in which you feel like walking? T: When it’s still cold in the morning…. recently in the evening… ---- H: I see…. It seems that you spent a lot of time working in a room but with that feeling, I think we should talk about the release we are commemorating today.  This song was one of the many you were doing at that time, right? For you, this song looked as it was going to be selected as a single for sure, you said it yourself… T: That’s right. It's a bit ballad-like and I thought that kind of song hasn’t been released as a single recently. In that sense, it felt really nice to listen and after all, we got asked by the company to make a song that was easy to listen to….it seemed like even if it didn’t become single, it would be a song that would be included in the album… H: You were thinking about this song as a part of the next album…. T: When we decided to make a single of this song….of course I thought there was no problem at all with it being a single but, still saving it for the album would had been a nice “hook” for the album…. H: Maybe the direction of the next album would still be more unclear if this song were kept for it? T: Still, I think it would be ok to just change if we needed to. Nowadays we still don’t know about the direction of the next album though.