#and not because he didn't want karlach to die

[maegalkarven]

I have an awful idea of Karlach and Durge actually knowing each other in the past, quite well, actually.

(The reason Karlach did not recognize Durge is because Durge always used that shape-shifting mask of theirs and looked like someone else).

Durge and Gortash met for the first time 11 or so years prior the game.

Durge was already a cult leader, Gortash was not yet Bane's Chosen or even banite, but was starting to work on the cults angle.

Durge hang around just enough for them and Karlach to hit off; it was actually Karlach who is the first person Durge felt genuine connection with.

Father Bhaal disapproved and Urge started to act up; Durge blacked out several times killing innocent tieflings, acted a lil weirder than usual.

Gortash, being Gortash, noticed.

He had a list of candidates from whom he was planning to choose the right person for Zariel's engine.

But he discarded them and sold Karlach instead; he explained it to himself as there's no better candidate for the role. She would survive the engine being installed and, if she was tough enough, would survive Avernus and emerge victorious.

It had nothing to do with his unstable ally acting more unstable than before.

Durge, who at that point had caught up what Father demanded Karlach dead and, for the first time ever, were hesitating to kill someone, visited Gortash and found out Karlach was gone.

"Good," is all they said. They did not elaborate.

[anarkhebringer]

I finally saw the cutscene of Karlach visiting her parents' graves with Null and I've had tadpoles about it all this time

[thisaccountisagainstmywill]

BG3 Characters Safest Driver Headcanons

I've been thinking about that poll from months ago way too much, so I've pulled this from my drafts. In this essay, I will explain why Boo is the best driver. Astarion: Terrible. Absolutely terrible driver. He is doing his makeup with the visor down, looking at the mirror more than the road. Suspend your disbelief, he's driving in this universe. He can use mirrors. ♥ You have to grab the steering wheel, regularly. Without warning, the man twists around to find his purse in the back seat because he wants a different eyeliner than what he grabbed. You are on aux duty. He hates everything you've picked. 2/10, he lawyered his way into that license Gale: You would think he would be safe, but then you remember that Gale didn't pay attention in boring classes. And how hard could driving really be?? The man knows how to drive perfectly textbook. He also thinks he knows how to do it better than everyone else. He does not adapt well to poor drivers. The roads are full of poor drivers. He is yeling "Zipper!" at the merging traffic. You spend five minutes in the parking lot so he can find just the right song for the trip.

6/10, you will probably not die Halsin: The man drives slow, I'm sorry. He's fuel efficient as you can get with the windows down. He pulls over and stops traffic for ducks crossing the road, no matter what the current road conditions are. He stops to show you the new tree the neighbor got. He is a Yellowstone Park tourist. He wants to show you the world, one traffic-stopping mid-road parking job at a time. There is no music, we are listening to nature today. 4/10, you will be rear-ended with him and not the way most people want Jaheira: I stand by what I said last time: Jaheira reminds me of so many older women I know. She drives like she wants someone to start shit with her. She's so conditioned by having 5 kids fighting in the backseat at all times that every time she's behind the wheel she's having Vietnam-level flashbacks. Her blood is pumping in her ears. There is no road, there is only the red of her vision. She won't start the road rage incident directly, but by god, she will end it. (You tried to ask about music, but the look she gave you when asked killed the question.) 5/10, you make it to your destination intact. But at what cost? Your pants are a different color at the end of the trip than they were at the beginning. Karlach: Karlach is talking with her hands while she drives. She's fiddling with the radio constantly. You've blown four red lights. Three of them were the same red light because she took a wrong turn. She will not use GPS, she's got the vibe of where she's going. She was trying to show you something on her phone at the same time. It cannot wait. It was so good you have to see it right now. The tunes are so loud she hasn't heard the sirens behind her. 4/10, the tunes almost make up for it Lae'zel: You are helping her check her mirror distance before you get in the car. You are buckled in before the car even starts. You are not allowed to touch the light in the car if it is dark out. She was taught that it's illegal to have on at night and she takes that shit seriously. You are on blindspot-watching duty at all times. You're not allowed to have music on the in car, it is a distraction. 7/10, we are efficient, but we are miserable Minsc: Minsc cannot drive. Minsc was meant to drive today, but Minsc got into the wrong seat. We are all relieved. Jaheira trained him wrong on purpose and will kill you if you correct him. 0/10, don't even try. He will survive the accident, you will not. Minthara: Minthara, light of my life. She is gremlin cackling and riding bumpers the whole time. People are pulling off constantly to get away from her. You are white-knuckling in the passenger seat and are too afraid to let go of the bitch-bar. You pray her airbags are up to date because your life has not stopped flashing before your eyes since you got onto the road. We are exclusively listening to The Flight of the Valkyries. 7/10, it is shockingly efficient when no one else is on the road anymore

Shadowheart: I have been in many a 'Shadowhearts' car. The car is more of a problem than she is. She drives the type of car that makes people go, "You live like this?" She drives a manual. She was not trained to drive a manual. Almost every single dash light is on, the ones that aren't had their bulbs die out years ago. We don't know how old that trash is, but it lives here now. She has one of those cassette players that has to hook into your phone to come out the speakers. Good luck finding the right adaptor in the mess. 4/10, girl get your shit together Wyll: Wyll is the best driver, hands down...when he is alone. Like all things in his life, his greatest flaw is being too polite. He turns his whole fucking head to look at you when you talk because that is the polite thing to do. The road is secondary to how important your conversation and companionship are to him. And you can't not talk him! He's asking you genuine questions about your day because he's interested. You get to listen to whatever you want and he's totally down for it even if it's not normally his thing. He'll find something he likes about it. Alone: 100/10, he somehow makes everyone better drivers by just being on the road With you: 5/10, Wyll, please, look at the road. ;_;

Boo: My eyes are closed. It's better this way. We made it there in record time. I don't know how it happened. I don't need to know how it happened. ?/10, it's best if you don't think about it

[madwomansapologist]

blossoming alone over you

Meet Kind!Druid!Tav | More Weirdos | AO3

synopsis: It doesn't matter what their first impressions of you were, they certainly did not expect you to be so important in their lifes. And as the days passes, each one of your companions need to understand a simple fact: they love you. They all love you.

warnings: it's 31st december. i'm drunk. song "pink on the night" by mitsky for wyll. song "working for the knife" by mitsky for astarion. song "abbey" by mitsky for shadowheart. companions (wyll, astarion, shadowheart) x druid!tav. background cast (karlach, kagha, halsin, lae'zel, gale, cazador). tav is used as a nickname. wyll stuttering. astarion seeing draws of himself because he fucking deserves it. shadowheart falling for a druid that can turn into a wolf.

Trust betrayed, secrets spread, lies disguised as facts. That's how life works. It gives you hope, then crushes it front of your eyes. It let's you reach your goal, just to rip it out from your bare fingers.

The cruelty of life is the ultimate sign that gods do exist. There must be a higher being watching its puppets pathetic attempts of conquering an unreachable happiness. There are other proofs, but that's the easiest to perceive.

And they were used to it. From the renowed Blade of Frontiers to the pale elf hiding in the shadows: they all knew what to expect from life. Dishonest agreements, stolen hearts, the cold embrace of loss. Life is painful, so they shielded themselves from any harm.

But not you.

At first they assumed you were naive. The things Shadowheart thought to herself when you reached for a hand stuck in a portal; or how easily Astarion deceived you when he thought you were a mind flayer; even Wyll judged you from time to time.

You let your guard down easily. Instead of protecting yourself, you were helping others. Instead of using your teeths and claws to get what you wanted, you preserved nature.

But naive you were not. You may have trusted them too easily, but you weren't blind. You knew when a question was a order, when a joke was a threat, when a smile was just sharp teeth showing.

You discovered what Astarion really was and demanded he wouldn't maim anyone that didn't deserved it. You convinced Wyll that the evil he so wanted to tear apart was a victim. Saw right throught Kagha's distorted teachings, don't matter how alluring they sounded.

To turn a foe into a friend was your instinct, but you were not hesitant to solve problems with violence if it was needed. And sometimes you even got pleasure from it.

Wyll will never forget your face after finding out about Kagua's deal with the shadow druids. You didn't even allowed the party to rest. All your party received from you was an order to clean the ivy from their weapons.

"Shouldn't we focus on freeing Halsin? He must understand Kagha better than us," Wyll pointed. "You're a druid, but that doesn't mean the groove sees you as one of them. But they will hear Halsin."

"She can hear me," you slammed your staff on the ground, giving strength to your certainty. It pulsed with energy, and its glow matched the beat of your heart. "Or she can die. I can grant her mercy, but I won't give her time."

Wyll felt his body getting warmer, Shadowheart's impressed whistle reached his ear. "O-Of course," he cleared his throat. "After you."

"We'll purge some rats," you smirked at him. It didn't feel threatening. "Can I count with your blade?"

"Always," Wyll answered you, staring at your back. He could stare at your back all day. And he meant it.

Seeing that you weren't naive, Astarion came to a conclusion about you. Meanwhile the Blade of Frontiers stopped seeing your benevolent acts as a signs of impulsivity, the pale elf saw them as a mask. Something meant to cover what others should be paying attention to instead.

After all, who would suspect that something is rotten when the scent is sweet?

You're beautiful. Astarion admit it. Your laugh reverberates through the forests, your tiredness calls for aid, your eyes attract and soothe. Beautiful faces can make up for dirty minds, soft words can hide the lack of a heart, pretty acts are easier to see than destructive intentions.

You're just like him. Astarion sees it, clear as the sea. Your delicate smiles and his gaze full of lust are just as fake. Your sweet words and his dirty innuendos are both rehearsed. In need of this party, it's not hard to understand why you two would act to ensure they don't ever leave.

When Shadowheart cures you first, Astarion's invisible reflection occupies your eyes. When Lae'zel attacks monsters aiming at you, he's your shadow. When Gale puts more food on your plate, Astarion can see his smile on your face.

He wouldn't be surprised to find out that you both look the same.

One may say that your corrupt intentions are nothing compared to the good you've already done, but Astarion is not so idealistic. Sin stains your good deeds, he can see it. You depict yourself as someone better than them, better than him, but that's just your depraved plan to survive.

And he can't blame you. It's working perfectly.

Astarion may despise you for being as dirty as himself, but he respects that part of you. He trusts your plans, your combat skill, your magic. You're good on what you do. Screaming instructions to help during fights, discovering hidden passages, trading for better weapons.

You're not a good person, but there's a reason for why you survived this far. You're competent. That Astarion can respect. That's why he's constantly trying to get on your good side. You are smart and strong. Maybe strong enough to rip Cazador apart.

And if you haven't realize that Astarion is putting on an act to win your heart, than the shame is on you for not realizing that you both are the exactly same thing.

But you had to show him how wrong he was.

At midnight you approached his tent with your sketchbook. Astarion thought you wanted a distraction, using your drawings just as an excuse to talk a bit. Gods know he was dying of boredom before you appeared.

"I didn't knew you were so talented, darling," he praised you.

Illuminated by candles, Astarion let his guards down. Instead of just saying the right thing at the time, Astarion was really impressed at your skills.

It must be nice. To be able to create things with your bare hands. Sometimes he cry at the start of a good book. He don't know why, but it must be because he too would like to be making things. Astarion thinks that creating is the ultimate sign that you're alive, instead of just surviving.

Maybe one day he can become a poet.

"I can't help but notice that you have a muse," it was clear someone had attracted your gaze. Maybe a dear friend you miss, or perhaps another competitor for your attention. "Should I worry about being replaced?"

Astarion expect you to flush, but all you did was to get... softer? You seemed to shrivel up.

Your mouth dried up. He doesn't even recognize himself. Astarion don't even remember how he looked like.

"That's you, Astarion," you told him. "And that's a gift. You helped a lot these past months and... All I'm trying to say is that I'm grateful."

It was the first time you saw Astarion in silence. Paper by paper, he admired your drawings. Do they look bad? You've spent a lot of time training to be able to create something worthy of his beauty, but you admit they're not perfect.

Or maybe it isn't the quality. It's the fact that you spend so long drawing him. How many hours did you spend on those sketchs? How many hours did you spend glaring at him from your tent? Does he feel ofended? Invaded?

"That's how you see me?" Astarion whispered.

You barely heard his words.

"Yes, Astarion," you licked your lips. "I know some can be..."

His hand on your thigh stopped the rant you were about to go on. His bloody eyes were sharp. Just like the day you first met him, his dagger against your throat. Astarion looked pleased, but not happy.

As if he discovered being right about something he rather not be.

What you gave him... this is a treasure. So many drawings, so many angles, so many poses. How many centuries has it been since he last saw himself? How many since Astarion forgot his own face? Sometimes he touches his face, trying to picture it, but his imagination isn't good.

You gave him something priceless.

And when something is priceless that people discover how sunk in debt they really are.

"And now you want me to pay you back," his husky voice made shivers went down your spine. His nails scratched lightly your skin, drawing shapes on your thigh. "Don't you?"

You jumped from your spot, getting away from him. You were flushed, but not in a good way. "From where I came from," you breathed in. You sounded offended. "Something that puts you in debt isn't a gift."

As you turned over to go to sleep, you felt that if you didn't say what you really thought you would end up exploding. You know you don't have the right to speak about his life, but that didn't stopped you.

"Cazador made you believe that you have to sell yourself to be worth of anything, but he's wrong. He was wrong since the very start. We'll lacerate that monster for what he did to you. And that I promise you: it won't be fair. Cazador don't deserve fair."

You felt your nails digging the skin of your palms. "That was a gift. Get used to it."

Maybe Astarion was wrong about you. And maybe he was wrong about himself.

Merciful, but not weak. Gentle, but not naive. Pleasing, but not manipulable. You were a walking question mark. Whenever they thought they understood what you were, you proved them wrong. Not impulsive. Not manipulative. Not stupid.

Until they came up with a word that described you too perfectly. A word that didn't need any buts or explanations. One that everyone cognize, but that isn't used often. That don't deserve to be used often.

You're kind.

It's in your nature to be considerate. You help others because you can. No. Wrong. And that's something that Shadowheart still don't really understand: you help others because you can, so therefore you should.

She has only one goal in mind. Shadowheart needs to make to Baldur's Gate with the mysterious artifact in safety, and if she does everything right... maybe her Lady will grant her what she truly want.

But you make Shadowheart forget about all that.

She must be discreet, she did that her whole life, and still Shadowheart finds herself talking about her goddess to you. Her mission depends on her going straight towards Baldur's Gate yet there she's, following you as you try to solve everyone's problems.

Shadowheart didn't even noticed. She didn't made a rational choice to open herself to you. She just did it. Almost as if you were fundamental part of her forgotten past and her heart couldn't do nothing but to trust you.

You impervious into her prayers. Invaded her dreams. Burned your mark inside her mind. Your name feels like honey on her tongue. Like a sweet treat that she can never get enough of.

You tempted her, luring her with your determination and grace, and Shadowheart proved herself sinful once again.

If only you had judged Shadowheart for her loyalty to Lady Shar. Asking her what her favorite flower is. Listening to her opinions. Even when she was nothing but distant and cold, you were sweet. Toothaching sweet.

Shadowheart was hungry. She'd been hungry for her whole life. Starving for something easy. Something raw. Something more than a beautiful concepts. Something real. And how could a starving person ignore a banquet?

She can't. Shadowheart couldn't. But she should've. Damn, she should've.

You're testing her faith. Constantly. Every smile, every vulnerable look, every act of protection. It's like you're trying to compete with Lady Shar for the control over her mind. Sometimes it feels like you're winning.

She was admiring the sky without stars when the wolf came. All it took was a sight to paralyze her. Shadowheart had a mace, but the weapon was useless in her trembling hands.

The giant beast, wool pale from the moonlight, foamy drool dripping from its fangs. In a golden glow that being of darkness transformed into something.

Into you.

"It's just me," you whispered to her, eyes wide with worry and blame. "I didn't... You're safe. You're fine."

She forced herself to unclench her jaw. "Don't tell any of them," Shadowheart hissed as soon as she knew she could speak without stuttering. "Let this fear I have stay as a secret."

"As you wish," was what you said. No questions, no jokes, no provocations.

You went back to rummage through lost boxes and barrels in the ruined village. You had goblin's blood staining your face, but it didn't seen to bother you. "I wish I had a bag of holdings," you murmured to yourself.

Shadowheart was grateful. Either you decided to change the subject to cease her embarrassment or you just were this easily distracted, it still meant something. Her flushed cheeks went unnoticed.

She leafed through some damp books, trying to find something useful. "Embrace loss," she murmured to you. Now your attention was back on her. "We'll never let you have one."

You gasped. "Moon, why is that?"

Shadowheart ignored how breath turned into a difficult task when you used that new nickname.

"Face it, Tav," she called you by the nickname Gale created to you. "You are a compulsive hoarder. I've seen you keep a rotten apple in your pocket."

"I thought it could be useful!"

Shadowheart smiled. She did not even realized she was smiling. "I bet you did."

You have a soft spots for battles you can't possible win, protecting people in need and turning foes into friends. And apparently you are their soft spot.

Part 2!

if you enjoyed, please reblog! i promise it makes a difference ♡

@ madwomansapologist.tumblr.

[m00nlight-ramblings]

Together

The aftermath of Elminster's visit created an implosion between Gale and Tav, but their love will help them pick up the pieces.

Pairings: Gale x female Tav/Reader

Requested: yes

Warnings: hurt/comfort, swearing, mentions of suicide. 18+ MINORS DNI.

Word Count: 1.7k

The crickets chirped brightly, their noise matching with the twinkling of the stars overhead. The air around camp was thick, heavy - weighted in a way that only came after dark knowledge was discovered. This knowledge was dropped like a bomb - which, for this situation, was an apt metaphor.

"Tav..." Gale started, his back to you. He watched as Elminster - fucking Elminster, with his awful news he brought with a smirk - left camp, no doubt happy to have his belly full with our cheese, and our bread, and our wine.

"Don't," You interrupted him, the anger rising in you. Like a simmering stew, it boiled in your heart, causing you to hear the pumping of your blood in your ears. Your hands shook slightly as you ran them through your hair, taking on a life of their own. "Don't you dare say anything."

The other companions stood around the campfire, a few feet away from you both. The news of Gale's new "mission" that Elminster delivered to us - to blow himself up for the sake of possibly all humanity - hung between you all. Gale...the kind, goofy, open-hearted wizard that filled our nights with laughter and friendship, was now expected to kill himself. Which, he agreed to.

Gale...the love of your life. The man who held you countless nights, who celebrated your victories in battles and who made you scream and tremble with pleasure.

Willingly agreed to die.

Imagining a future where he no longer existed - dead by his own hand - caused tears to spring to your eyes quickly. And not delicate, lady-like tears...hot, blobbing, uncontrollable tears. Unable to deal with the reality of the situation, you turned on your heels to take off to the woods. You heard Gale call your name, followed by a stern (but gentle) Karlach try to diffuse him.

The small stream on the outskirts of camp babbled lightly, as you finally stopped and broke down. Not only in tears, but also physically - you found yourself on your knees, a groan escaping your lips and turning into a wail, uncontrollable.

You sobbed into your hands, tears and snot mixing on your face. You hiccupped through the sobs, strangling your throat and echoing off of the trees. A few moments later, the sound of footsteps mixed with your sobs.

The only two sounds in the woods.

"Tav..." Gale's voice was low, barely above a whisper. You didn't look, but you felt him sit next to you, immediately wrapping his arms around you. You fought him, trying to push him off of you, but his strength held on strong, and he didn't let go.

"Stop! Stop it!" You tried to pull away, wriggling underneath him, "How could you?! How could you agree to this? This-this...suicide mission!" Your voice sounded like a caricature of itself as you beat your fists into Gale's chest. He allowed it, letting you strike the weak blows to his body.

"Tav, Tav - stop. Listen to me," He said gently, shaking you slightly to break your erratic behavior, "Stop it. Look at me." He slipped his arms off of you and held your cheeks in his palms, your hands instinctively wrapping around his wrists. You were mere inches from each other, and while you were a mess, you felt your face turn to stone as you looked into his eyes.

Your anger - or rather, your hurt that you didn't want to show - pulsed through your body as Gale searched your eyes, running his thumbs of your cheeks. The air stilled - suddenly, you noticed tears in Gale's eyes, his mouth turned downward into a slight frown.

You broke down into tears again, leaning into Gale's shoulder. Again, he wrapped his arms around you and let you sob in his nook as he stroked your hair, murmuring in your ear.

"How could you do this?" You asked again, in between sobs, "How could you agree to do this? Was it because of Mystra?" You pulled back suddenly, jealousy somehow pushing past your grief and anger, "Fuck, did you agree to do this so that Mystra would forgive you? Do you still-"

"If you are about to ask me if I still love Mystra, I'd advise you to not," Gale said, wiping your tears gently. A playful smile quickly appeared on his face and disappeared just as fast, "After all the nights we've spent together? All the words, and kisses, and moments we've shared, and you think I could possibly have love in my heart for her still? When you've taken up all the space there possibly is?"

"Then why, Gale? Why did you agree to this?"

Gale sighed heavily, running a hand through his hair. He paused a moment, pulling away and looking up into the sky. He looked back at you, searching your face.

"My entire life, I've dreamt of something...more. I always thought I was destined for greatness. Not only because I felt it, but because I was told so. I worked so hard for everything...and wanted to do things no other man has done," He sighed, shaking his head slightly, "What a fool I was. Look where it's gotten me," Looking at you, he smiled sadly and absentmindedly felt the marking of the orb on his chest, "A mistake that easily has cost me my life in many regards. But...if I could do something to stop all this...I must try."

His words hung in the air as you looked out, past the stream and through the clearing. Tortured by the idea of never seeing Gale again, you grabbed his hand and held it tight, giving it a quick squeeze.

"I can't let you do this," You said, whispering, "I refuse to let us come this far for it all to be for naught. I refuse-" You voice caught in your throat, breaking as you spoke, "...I refuse to live in a world without you."

"Darling-" Gale started, but you quickly interrupted him.

"I refuse to live in a world where you, and me, and Tara aren't living in your tower in Waterdeep. I refuse to believe I won't have a life watching the sun set with you, a life where I don't wake up next to you. A life where you don't cook me your famous dinner you've talked about so much-" You heart lurched, seeming to break into a thousand pieces, "You promised you'd cook me dinner." The last words came out as a cry more than a sentence, causing Gale to grab you fiercely and hold on to you.

Soon, you realized you weren't the only one sobbing. A strangled, wet cry landed in your ears as Gale held you close, and now it was blaringly obvious he wasn't doing it just for your sake. You wrapped your arms around him, clutching on to his back just short of digging your fingernails in.

"Your life is not any less important than anyone you would save," You said, gently kissing his neck, "Please remember that. Please remember that you aren't alone, and all of us are here to find another solution. I am here to help find another solution."

"I cannot fail," He said, gently pulling back and looking at you. His eyes, red and shimmering from crying, were mournful. "...I cannot be a failure."

You shook your head gently and took both of his hands into yours, causing him to look down, "You are not. You are a hero....you..." You trailed off, trying to find the words. Were there any words that could encapsulate Gales heroism, the painfully wonderful mark he was already making on the world?

"You are so much more than The Wizard of Waterdeep." You finally said, smiling gently and tucking a piece of hair behind his ear. He slowly looked up at you.

"What can possibly be more than The Wizard of Waterdeep?" He asked, his voice barely above a whisper. Leaning in, you touched your forehead to his.

"Gale," You spoke, "Being Gale is so much more than being The Wizard of Waterdeep."

A small breath escaped his lips as he chuckled lightly, a tear escaping his eye. He kissed you - passionately, his hands finding the back of your head and burying themselves in your hair. His tongue gently opened your mouth as your bodies pushed closer, your hands resting on his chest.

Your heart beat rapidly, the butterflies caused by the kiss fluttering at the same speed as your pulse. You loved this man so ferociously that sometimes it hurt. You'd do anything to protect him, to help him...to save him.

Eventually, he pulled away and looked into your eyes.

"We will find another way," He said finally, gently. "I...will find another way."

You nodded encouragingly, a smile playing on your lips, "We will. The world cannot lose you because the 'Mistress of the Weave' says so. I won't allow it."

Gale laughed at his, running a thumb down your cheek, "Bold words."

"Bold words that I plan to force into action, if necessary." You spoke, matching his smile.

"You are fierce, my love," Gale said, gently rising and offering a hand to help you up. You accepted it and he pulled, wrapping you in his arms, "You are a fierce thing. There is no one like you."

"And there is no one like you," You retorted, inhaling his scent as he held you, "World famous or not." Pulling away, you took his hand and started to lead him back to the camp, "Life will not be complete until we are back in Waterdeep. Together. Forever."

Gale nodded. "You're just saying that because you want me to cook you my famous roast dinner."

Laughing, you looked at him, his eyes twinkling. You felt at home as you searched his face, the familiar lines causing your heart to speed up.

Gale was your heart, your home. Your present and your future, and where there was him, there was joy. Notoriety or not, nothing on this planet could make you happier than him.

Elminster and Mystra be damned, you would fight this thing tooth and nail.

The two of you. Together.

-----

Thanks to the anon who requested this! I'm an unabashed Gale lover (tm) so I was so glad when this popped into my inbox!

Reminder: my inbox is open for requests!

[baldursgate3tempobsessed]

Hi hi!!! I just found your blog and I love how you wrote Astarion. I have a small request if you're still taking them!

Because of Halsin's one line about how his wildshape is hard to repress I have a headcanon that certain druidic animal forms get triggered by certain emotions. So what if a druid Tav was hurt or scared and got stuck in animal form, and Astarion had to calm them down long enough for them to shift back/get healed

Aww, I like this. But some TW: The reason for them being hurt/scared is fucked and involves dead children. I killed off some NPCs for this one (but they live in the real game I swear!) Also set in Act 2, after he confesses. Just so you know! Don't trigger yourself for this.

~

There was a reason that Astarion always tried to convince you to not leave him behind at camp. Mostly because it could be dreadfully boring, doing nothing but sitting there waiting for your return. But also because he didn't like being out of the loop. There had been many moments, too many, where he had been the sole reason you were still standing. Whether that be stabbing someone in the back who held a dagger to your throat or being the one to help you back on your feet from the brink of death, Astarion had gotten very good at keeping you alive.

He didn't trust anyone to watch out for you the way he could, a belief that was instantly strengthened when the group came back. With you nowhere to be seen. It was only Halsin and Shawdowheart, beaten and bloodied as they limped their way forward.

The sight of them had Astarion on his feet in an instant, an awful feeling settling in the pit of his stomach as he waited for you to slink out of the tree line to join them. But nothing.

"Where are they?" Astarion asked, his voice loud and fraught enough to cut through the others questions on what happened, "Why isn't Tav with you?"

Neither of them answered, instead they swapped a knowing grimace. The silence was enough for Astarion's blood to go cold, the worst jumping to the forefront of his mind. B-But that couldn't be. The two in front of him wouldn't just leave her to die, would they? He would hope not, otherwise he'd be forced to bleed them both dry. Astarion was so lost in his thoughts he hadn't even realized how heavily he was breathing, how his hands were trembling at the very thought of your being gone. Your corpse just left behind for the wolves in the cursed Shadowlands.

"Astarion, breathe," Halsin said gently, the behemoth of a man suddenly standing in front of him, his hands gently resting on his shoulders, "I know where they are, they're okay. They just... aren't exactly themselves right now, or at least not the version you know."

"If they're okay then why in the hells aren't they here?" Astarion seethed back at him, swatting his touch away before steeping back, "You just left them out there? Alone?"

"It's not that simple," Halsin started, right as Shadowheart piped up, "Karlach is with her. We aren't that incompetent."

"Well considering that our leader is missing, I wouldn't exactly call you capable," Astarion barked back at her, already turning back towards Halsin, "Take me to them. Now."

The venom in his voice would have surprised Astarion himself if he was capable of thinking about anything but you dead in the middle of nowhere. He barely even had the patience for Halsin to get adequate healing, but it was better than having to wait for him to limp the entire way there. He felt antsy and off center for the entire journey, completely foreign emotions taking over him. He didn't care about people like this, for the precise reason that it led to these horrifying moments of uncertainty. He didn't know what he would do without you anymore. He didn't want to ever find out.

It figures that you would go and almost get yourself killed right after he admitted a portion of his feelings to you. And now everything he wished he'd said was invading his every thought.

"Oh come on now, don't make that face! You know me!"

The sound of Karlach's voice was enough to bring him out of his own head. She was up ahead, kneeling next to a small cave opening as she spoke, "For something so cute, you're being a bit of a pisser right now. Aren't you?"

Astarion didn't miss the bodies littering the way between where he stood and the cave, a mix of homely gnolls and dead tieflings, some that he unfortunately recognized from the grove. He didn't take the time to examine them closely, but... he was aware that many looked young. Much, much too young to have died here.

"There they are," Halsin sighed as Karlach cooed at the cave opening, "They've been in there since we stumbled upon all of... this."

"They've gotten less scratchy at the least," Karlach added, standing up with a stretch, her gaze pointedly avoiding the massacre in front of them, "But they won't stop hissing up a storm. I tried to pull them out by the scruff and almost lost a hand, so I'm thinking we may have to wait this one out."

Astarion ignored her as he got closer to the cave, his eyes widening at what he saw. It was you, or at least he was thought it was. He was well-aware of your druidic abilities and he had seen you polymorph into a ferocious beast many, many times. But never like this. No, you always had a human air about you when you shifted, the reality of your true shelf always shining through your eyes, never without perfect control.

But now, you were cowering in your panther form, your eyes daring back and forth, your coat so covered in blood that it nearly looked like you had been swimming in it. You even hissed at the sight of him of all people, your teeth bared as you backed farther against the cave wall, nothing but pure animal fear and rage behind your eyes.

"It can happen sometimes," Halsin explained with a frown, "Tav is very connected with this form, perhaps too connected. Enough so for it to take over when they're particularly distressed. It used to happen to me even, many, many moons ago. It can take hours to change back, maybe even days. And it can be very... difficult to remember your life outside of instincts."

Well wasn't that just fucking awful? Figures there had to be a drawback to such a powerful advantage. But he'd be damned if he'd leave you out here alone for days. And he doubted that the extra audience would help with anything.

"Leave us," Astarion ordered, his eyes still on you, "I'll find a way to bring them back to camp."

Halsin and Karlach exchanged a glance, obviously weary at the idea. Karlach cleared her throat, "Astarion, I know that the two of you are, um, close, but I don't think you can do anything-"

"Watch me," Astarion said, his words petulant even to his own ears. But he meant it. If anyone could help you through whatever this was, it was going to be him, "If I'm not back before the sun rises feel free to look for me. Now leave."

"But she could kill you on accident! And if my best friend had to wake up to that-" Karlach tried to argue, interrupted by Halsin putting a strong hand on her shoulder, "Just because part of them is lost doesn't mean all of them is. Astarion can handle himself."

Astarion was a bit surprised to receive the druid's support, but he wasn't about to argue over it. He nodded at them, "I'll be fine. Now go, I don't think the crowd is helping with their nerves."

Astarion watched them walk away, only relaxing when they were out of sight. It felt like he could finally breathe again. There you were, safe and sound if not a bit... changed. But he could work with that.

Astarion sat cross-legged to the side of the cave entrance, his voice soft but scolding as he spoke, "'I'll be safe Astarion, don't worry about me Astarion, you're such a little overthinker Astarion.' And now look at you, trapped in a cave with a cat's body. Darling, I think it's high time that you start listening to me."

Astarion hadn't been expecting an answer, but the pitiful little chirp you let out brought a smile to his face. He scooted a bit closer to the entrance, careful not to actually cross the threshold as he spoke, "I'm serious Tav, do you know how horrible it was to see them come back without you? I'd say a punishment would be in order, if you weren't too busy giving it to yourself that is."

Another small, dejected noise, but it sounded closer this time. Astarion glanced at the entrance, smiling when he saw you sitting there on all fours, your tail twitching as you peeked outside. Perhaps it wasn't the wisest thing to do but Astarion slowly brought his hand up, hovering it right in your face while praying that you wouldn't take the chance to bite it off, "It seems like you haven't lost the faculty for understanding language yet. Lick my hand if I'm right."

You did, your large sandpaper tongue gliding over his palm before retreating. You looked... different than before. In a good way, but not a whole way.

"That's a good kitty," Astarion praised, laughing at the way the pet name made your brows scrunch up. Perhaps you weren't fully yourself, but enough of you was there for him to know you'd be getting him back for that little quip, "Oh don't look at me like that. You're the full-grown adult in the body of a glorified housecat."

The little growl you let out at that just made him laugh harder, "A very pretty housecat. Does that help my love?"

You didn't answer. Instead you turned with a huff and retreated back into the cave, your demeanor much more relaxed than before. Relaxed enough for Astarion to venture in there after you. It was a small space, just large enough for a panther to lay and a man to sit. You didn't hiss or growl as he settled in, just watched him with sharp eyes.

Astarion didn't like it. You were usually so tactile with him, always finding reasons for touch, even if they were simple. Standing shoulder to shoulder, intertwining your fingers together, hugs and kisses innocent enough to make Astarion melt. Even in your animal form, not touching you just felt... wrong.

But Astarion also wasn't trying to get mauled. He kept his hands to himself, his head cocked as he stared at you, "Are you honestly going to stay all the way over there? We might be here all night darling, you wouldn't want me to be cold would you?"

Perhaps that was manipulative phrasing, but at least it worked. You shuffled closer, resting your head in his lap while staring up at him with those big eyes.

"See?" Astarion cooed down at you, taking the chance to pet your head, "Isn't that better?"

You didn't answer, instead you closed your eyes, a light purr coursing through you. You really did make an adorable panther, even when your fur was crusted with blood and the tiniest bit of gore. Perhaps you didn't smell that best at the moment, but you sure were cute. You fell asleep there, right in his lap, your body finally fully relaxed.

This wasn't exactly how Astarion intended on spending his night, but there were plenty of worse things. Like having the bury the love of his life for example. Or watching a gnoll tear into their corpse. But luckily enough for him that didn't happen. No, he had you with him, safe and sound. Panther or not, he loved you, and one of these days he would get the courage to admit it out loud. Hopefully sooner than later, considering how easily you could be taken from him.

Astarion hadn't planned on falling asleep with you, but you were so warm, and the sound of your happy purring was nearly hypnotic. The next thing he knew he was out, awaking hours later to a dark cave and a different weight set in his lap. But not an unfamiliar one.

Astarion glanced down, breathing out a sigh of relief when it was you back to normal, seemingly shifting in the middle of the night. You were laying in what seemed to be an extremely uncomfortable position, your cute face smooshed against his leg as you slumbered.

"There you are," Astarion murmured, the quiet sound of his voice still enough to jolt you awake. You blinked your eyes open, sitting up with a start as you frantically looked around.

"Hey, hey, calm down. Everything's okay," Astarion said gently, tugging you back to him, "You just had a little... incident. That's all."

You nodded, the memories from the day seemingly hitting you all at once. He could see the tears start to well up in your eyes as you stared at the ground, "I... I remember the tieflings. We found them too late. And I saw one of those things gnawing on... on Silfy. And another on Mattis and I just... lost it."

Oh gods. Astarion didn't exactly have a soft spot for children, but the thought of seeing one of the ones you had saved, eaten alive was horrifying. Even against the things he had seen.

"Come here love," Astarion murmured, holding his arms out; his heart breaking at the look on your face.

You went to him, nearly collapsing in his arms as you cried into his shoulder, "I didn't save them. I- they were right there. And I didn't save them."

"You can't save everyone," Astarion said as he stroked your hair, "Not every life can be your responsibility. It just can't."

"Why not?" You sniffled, looking up at him with tired eyes, "Why does this have to keep happening? Why can't I do something about it?"

"Because the world wasn't made for people like you," Astarion said honestly, "It is cruel and horrific and it doesn't deserve you. But it needs you anyway. It needs someone who cares, despite everything that proves you shouldn't. And that's not fair, but it's true."

Part of him could scarcely believe such words were even his own, let alone that fact that he believed them. But he did. You couldn't save everyone, no. But that didn't stop the fact that those you could mattered. That your kindness and passion for good did mean something, it meant enough to help hundreds of people. And enough to change him. Astarion would never be the same after meeting you. He didn't want to be, but even if he did the change was irrevocable. Because that's just the effect you had on people. And he felt so damned lucky that he was one of them.

You nodded against him as you let all of your tears out, his words meaningful but not enough to stop the pain completely.

But that was okay. Astarion wasn't going anywhere.

[gale-dekarios]

Favorite thing about Gale Dekarios?

it's embarrassing how long i spent sitting with this trying to think about my all time favourite thing about gale, because there's so much. i like that he's a dork, and sickeningly sincere, and i like that he's a cook, that he loves his not-a-cat, and that all he'd need to complete the ultimate wizard stereotype is a pointy hat and long grey beard.

but when it all boils down to it, i love that he's willing to try, after all of it. he, out of all the companions, probably fucked up the most. and i dont necessarily mean hes in the most fucked up position, i dont think you can really compare what the companions are going through as individuals like that, what i mean is that to go from the lover of mystra, an archmage, quite possibly one of the most powerful people in the sword coast if not the whole of toril, to a dude you have to pull out of a malfunctioning portal, an embarrassing footnote in a goddess's history, about to die, from the orb, or ceremorphosis, or just generally being out in the wilderness as a level one wizard likely for the first time in his life ever, well, it's a lot isn't it?

the only person who could come close to understanding that level of a drop is perhaps wyll, but then again, wyll didn't so much as fall as he took a leap that he knew would end poorly for him, not to mention that wyll was seventeen. not that he'd likely make another choice now that he's older bc he's wyll, but gale, at least from his perspective, can't hide behind the greater good, or youth, from what he did.

gale's at rock bottom, and he doesn't have karlach's cheer to make up for the fact that he's dying, tadpole or no.

there's no way i would be able to keep going after all of that. id find a large field in the middle of nowhere and wait until the end comes for me. but gale doesn't. he keeps going, even though he's pretty sure he's going to die and it's all futile anyway, he keeps going. and he makes connections, despite the fact it could all be snuffed out in an instant. he goes through what's possibly the world's most messiest break up, one that quite literally is going to kill him, and yet when he's told he can redeem himself, to make the embarrassing footnote into a noble one, all it takes is you asking him to live for him to throw all of that aside, his entire past, everything he ever worked for, for the idea of a future that might not ever come. and he doesn't even need to be in love with you for him to agree to that.

he wants to live anyway. no matter how much more difficult is. no matter how unsure he is that he's actually got anything to go back to. he has a tara, and wine, and food, and books, and quite possibly the weirdest band of people he's ever met, and he decides THAT'S enough. sure, the ideas of something greater never fully leave the edge of his psyche, but again, if you ask him to, if you show him life's worth living, he'll then give up actual godhood just so he can keep tara curled in his lap, the taste of good food and wine in his mouth, the feeling of paper under his fingertips, and a room full of love and laughter, in whatever capacity that may be.

it's hard to condense all of that into one word, into one attribute, so i guess what i'm trying to say is that my favourite thing about gale is that he's alive.

[kirain]

Finally doing a Gale-mance this playthrough (I've done Shadowheart and Karlach and had to gently turn Gale down both times) and while I initially mildly turned off by his grand gestures and flowery prose, it's rapidly growing on me because he's just so... earnest? Like yeah, he's theatrical but its all genuine. (And after reading your meta I've become suspicious that Big Grand Gestures are all he knows because what's a small, sentimental gesture to a goddess? I didn't go with the Astral Sex scene because I wouldn't have been able to handle it but now I'm glad I did for narrative reasons too.)

I'm happy for you! Many of my friends have also fallen down the X companion to Gale pipeline, but they didn't regret it. 😆

I also didn't choose the astral sex scene, but as an asexual, it doesn't bother me. I know a lot of people are 50/50 on it, but I think it's just another beautiful expression of love. The good news is I don't think it impacts Gale's decisions. You can try it and still tell him you prefer him as a man, and he'll be grateful.

Gale is theatrical, but you're right—it's what became expected of him. He was in a constant state of trying to impress a goddess. It's honestly heartbreaking, because I have a feeling he wouldn't have explored such grand gestures if not for Mystra, who according to both the game and D&D lore loves unconventional sex involving the Weave. I can't even imagine being under that kind of pressure.

Personally, I also found Gale's sex scenes to be painfully telling, because he doesn't make it about what he wants. Like you said, he's earnest. It might be his last night alive, but he focuses solely on your pleasure. He does all the work, he offers different methods, and he conjures a bed for your comfort. While he certainly is seeking support and doesn't want to be alone, he wants to spend what little time he has left making the one he loves happy.

He's also one of the few companions who will fully embrace your ilithid form, admire you for your sacrifice, and actively search for a cure and magical means to feed/protect you. He sets boundaries (like not allowing you to cheat on him), but you becoming a squid isn't one of them.

That's why I think Gale is one of the most loyal and devoted companions in the entire game, second perhaps only to Minthara, if you play as the Dark Urge. They're both very ride or die, but Gale is a soft, wholesome romantic who proves his love in everything he says and does.

Plus he cooks and has a cat. You can't go wrong. 😉

[rickoconnells]

Spoilers for bg3 ending under the cut but I'm having a lot of thinkings and also feelings on how you spare your companions from being manipulated by godlike beings while falling victim to it yourself repeatedly by the emperor's hand

Aaaanyway. I'm on my second playthrough, deeply unhappy with the choices I made in the first. Like a lamb being led to slaughter, the Emperor manipulates Tav into being little more than a pawn. And I'm annoyed. And this is word vomit.

Yes, you can refuse to give him the stones, and you can either damn yourself or save Karlach in the worst possible way, but regardless, Orpheus dies. The githyanki, who would kill the Emperor, remain Vlaakith's slaves. The Netherbrain, who would kill the Emperor, dies. He is free and you have served your purpose. You will not hear from him again. In fact, you only heard from him when he needed you.

He lies. Continually. Actively and by omission. He appears as the dream visitor, kind, exactly what you want to see - your protector, he REPEATEDLY reminds you. He opens up, he's vulnerable, only YOU can save this sad, trapped dream lord. Save him from what? He won't tell you. You're not ready. Just keep serving him and maybe one day you'll be good enough to know more. Just like Mystra holding back the Weave from Gale. Just like Cazador building an army using Astarion and his siblings' bodies. Just like Shar ripping Shadowheart's memories away again and again. Just be good and some day they will give you what you want.

He never lied. He just didn't tell you. You couldn't handle it. Didn't tell you he was illithid. He couldn't trust you. Trust him. Didn't tell you he was Balduran. Didn't tell you he killed his best friend, clearly in love with him, to save his own neck while that best friend was in the right. He could be once again controlled by the elder brain. He was trapped and controlled by Gortash. He had his fingers in the spine of Stelmane and by extension the city. He was a danger to everyone. But the Wyrm had to die - can't you see? He never lied. He just didn't tell you because it wasn't important. You weren't important enough to know. Don't be so silly. Don't overreact.

Whatever you do, don't free Orpheus. Because then you're being unreasonable. Then you're leaving him no choice. He has to join the Netherbrain, betray you, join what he has been forcing you to fight so hard against, kill you dead for not doing what he wanted, sacrifice you in a ritual of power, make you kill your parents, send your mentor to tell you to detonate the bomb in your chest, snuff out your life for a contract you've broken, take out your heart, make you a slave.

The game is telling you, over and over again, with your companions quest lines, that this is happening. And we all think because we're the hero of the story, it couldn't happen to us, when in reality everyone is the hero of their own story, and everyone has risked the same downfall.

[thechaoticdruid]

Something some people don't seem to get about Astarion is that he pretends not to care as a coping mechanism for guilt. He pretty much lies not only to us but also to himself. Probably hoping that if he says he doesn't care enough that the guilt will just vanish.

I honestly feel like these toxic coping habits also get turned up to eleven when he's ascended. So when you reject his offer to make you his spawn he deals with the pain by convincing himself that he didn't believe in love anyway.

Tav turns into a mind flayer and he can no longer bring himself to want to be with them. "Oh well they're disgusting so I don't care."

(I'd recently found out that if mind Flayer Tav peeks into A!Astarion's brain they find out he apparently still feels love so I guess he actually does feel the same way Spawn Astarion does about the situation. But of course AA is an ass about it.)

He can't turn Karlach so now he can't keep her with him forever. "It's not my fault it's yours!" *Proceeds to throw tantrum like a spoiled brat.*

Spawn Ending Astarion however learns to let himself be vulnerable and let it out since Tav actually makes him feel safe enough to do so.

So basically what I'm saying is Astarion is tsundere about his feelings if that makes sense. He keeps how he really feels guarded and insists he doesn't care when in actuality he does. And as THE VAMPIRE ASCENDANT these habits become even worse since he's done with the idea of being a good person entirely and just embraces his darkest impulses, but I doubt he can snuff out his humanity completely. He still comforts Tav if they end up bound to the incubus, he doesn't want Karlach to die and actually puts off his world-domination plans for her.

Anyway I think I made my point. I started this mostly because one of my guy friends who is also playing BG3 is convinced Astarion is 100% evil which isn't true. He definitely does evil things and is a selfish bastard but saying he's just evil isn't entirely accurate. (Granted this friend has yet to do an Astarion romance run so perhaps he's missing context.) Sorry if I might have got off topic or worded something strangely, but if you have anything to add to this comment below. 👇

[fireheartedpup]

Can't sleep because I made myself cry thinking of which of the tadfools would die first.

Jaheira would, I think. She's among the oldest, and it's simply her time. She's ready to go.

Karlach cries at her funeral more than her children do.

Minsc thought he would die in battle, but he grows attached to the kids Halsin raises, and eventually dies surrounded by those who love him. He tells Boo to take care of them before he leaves.

Gale goes next.

You might think it would be Karlach, but after she finds her heart, she lives a long life. She has chronic pain, and her chest hurts sometimes, but she's pretty sturdy overall. She runs an inn or a bar in a building Halsin insisted she make use of, and she's had a whale of a time building her business.

She thinks she has to pay him back, at first, but after a bit she figures she's more than earned it.

Everyone cries at Gale's funeral. He visited Reithwin often, and invited someone back to his home every time.

They miss his dinner parties when he's gone.

Karlach does go next. She holds out a long, long time, but age comes for us all. She's happy, at the end.

Wyll follows shortly after. He'd thought it would be difficult to part from his role as the Blade, but he loved helping his wife in the life they built together. He thought he would patrol the city as a full time job, but gradually settled into a full time fixture behind his wife's counter.

He loved the atmosphere. The witty banter. The chance to flex his muscles when a patron acted up.

He said he didn't know who he was without her anymore, after she was gone.

After that, it's Shadowheart. She's cultivated such a menagerie by this point that she accidentally created her own community. She doesn't encourage strict adherence to any deity, just mindfulness towards the needs of the animals.

Her home lives on as a peaceful place for healing and rest. Those who come after strictly inform the newcomers that mistreatment will not be tolerated.

After that, it's Halsin's turn. He's happy, when it comes. He's done everything he wants to. He knows those around him will continue his work. They understand how things should be done, and will guard against anything that would threaten the health and safety of their community.

He's almost revered.

Lae'zel would have gone sooner, but she's in and out of the astral plane. She apologizes to Astarion, once, for not being able to make all the funerals. The war with Vlaakith took most of her time and attention.

He tells her there's nothing to apologize for.

He doesn't see her die. She sends a message--set to activate automatically, should she fall in battle.

He can't bring himself to finish it. It's been long enough, by then. He knows how this ends.

He found a cure, somewhere along the way. It ended up happening a lot more abruptly than he ever could have expected. One moment, he's wondering if it's even possible; the next, he can feel the sun.

He lives out a natural elven lifespan. It's still longer than everyone else.

He thinks, at the end, that he's glad for his time with them. He's softer now. More well-adjusted.

Still sharp around the edges--this peace was hard-won.

He's ready, when the time comes. It would have been nice to live forever, and he did look into it.

He's learned his lesson. He doesn't want to pay the cost.

It just doesn't seem worth it, anymore.

He doesn't know if any god will be willing to accept him. If he still has a soul. If he'll ever be born again.

But he's ready to go.

P.S. Isobel and Aylin live forever. Isobel uses her abilities to extend her lifespan, and Aylin would follow her to heaven anyway. Selune probably figures that if she wants her daughter in Faerun, it's better to keep her cleric alive.

[vanishxcanvas]

Tell Me

Gale x F!Tav!Reader

Oneshot / Imagine

Content Warning: Fluff, Smut

Summary: You've been down bad for Gale for weeks, ever since you met the man. Now the others in your camp start to notice, and one day Gale overhears a conversation you're having with Karlach about him.

As you open your eyes, you see Gale reading. Quickly, your turn your head to avoid him seeing your face flushed. Unfortunately, someone else notices.

"You have the hots for Gale, huh?" Karlach asks you.

"Shut- I do not." You scoff.

"The pink on your cheeks say differently." She replies.

"Okay, maybe I lied." You say, bringing your hands to your face.

"Knew it." She laughs.

"But don't tell anyone, for the love of god." You tell her.

"Fine fine, but I do suggest you should make a move, he's staring at you." She says.

"Huh-" You say, looking the other way. Gale meets your gaze, and you quickly look away.

"I told ya, make a move." She suggests.

"Noooo," You say.

"Yesssss," She teases you.

Little did you know, Gale could hear everything. He was now well aware of how down bad you were for him. The man felt the same way though, in fact he was in love with you.

Throughout the day, he kept stealing glances at you, and it made you suspicious. You were currently on your way to Baldur’s Gate, but as the day went on, everyone got exhausted. Finally deciding to call it a day, you all set up camp.

As everyone went to bed (or so you thought), you went down to the forest so you could be alone with your thoughts. Gale was still awake though. He saw you leaving, so he decided to slowly follow you.

It was dark, but you decided to sit on the grass, and look at the stars.

As he saw you admiring the sky, he couldn't help but watch. So, when he finally speaks up, you were taken aback.

"It's pretty tonight, isn't it?"

Turning your head, you see Gale.

"Very. What are you doing up?" You ask him.

"I could ask you the same thing." He says, walking towards you, and sitting down next to you.

"Just thinking." You reply.

"About me?" He asks, raising an eyebrow.

"Huh? Why do you say that?" You ask.

"I couldn't help but overhear a certain conversation this morning, concerning me." He chuckles.

"Dear lord, I'm going to die now." You groan, putting a hand over your face.

"No you're not. Tell me. Is it true?" He asks.

Sighing, you put your hand down. "Yes." You say quietly.

"I didn't quite hear that." He says.

"I said yes." You answer, more louder this time.

"Good, because I like you too. No, I'm in love with you, actually." He replies.

"I'm glad to hear that." You smile, cheeks flushing to a pink color.

He turns his head to get a better look at you, then he kisses you. You kiss him back, placing a hand on his jaw.

Things get heated, then Gale pulls away, resting his forehead against yours. “You know, we are the only ones awake. If you know what I’m getting at.”

“I do.” You smirk, then push him so he’s laying down on the grass. Gale looks at you, and you go to straddle his lap.

You kiss him again, and he places his hands on your hips. As you're both making out, you start moving your hips so you're grinding on his lap.

He slides his hands under your shirt, and you shiver from how cold they are.

"Are you alright?" He asks, pulling away.

"I'm fine, you're just cold." You chuckle.

He smirks and takes this opportunity to flip you over, so now you're the one laying on the grass.

"I see what you did there." You say.

"That, I did. Now," He continues, running his fingers over your jaw.

You look at him with a raised eyebrow. "Hm?"

"Are you sure you want this?" He finally asks you.

"Please. I've been wanting this since we met." You reply.

After you say that, he immediately kisses you. He pins your arms above your head, and starts kissing down your neck.

When he starts to kiss down your body, he removes your clothes.

“You’re so perfect,” He breathes out.

You chuckle. “You’re not so bad yourself.”

As he gets to your underwear, he grins, then takes them off with his teeth.

“You’re going to be the death of me.” You say.

“Don’t die on me now.” He chuckles.

“I won’t, now hurry up.” You reply.

“As you wish, my lady.” He says before continuing. He runs his fingers through your folds, and groans deeply when he realizes you are soaked.

“By the nine hells. Damn it Gale, just fuck me already.” You demand.

“You sure about that?” He asks.

“Please.” You beg.

He decides he’s done teasing you, and he takes his clothes off. Hovering over you, he leaves kisses on your neck before sinking into you.

His hands grip your hips, hard enough to leave bruises. Worth it. You’re biting your lip to try and contain any noises that could possibly leave your mouth, so the others don’t hear.

As he pulls out and slams back into you, a groan accidentally leaves your lips. “Fuck,” You breathe out. When you feel like you’re close to being able to cum, you slide your hand down to rub your clit. Only for Gale to slap it away and do it himself.

“That’s my job.” He says. You clench around him as you feel his fingers.

“Shitshitshitshit-“ You shout as you cum around him. He squeezes his eyes shut and follows shortly after. Then he rests himself on top of you, your fingers stroking his hair.

When he finally looks up at you, he smiles. “So, you’re in love with me too, huh?”

You snort. “Of course I am, you dork.”

“Good. We’re doing that again, by the way.” He says.

“I’m not complaining.” You reply.

You both relax for a little longer, then go for a second round…only to wake the others up with your moans.

[merilaurecus]

Companions reactions to Modern!Tav from Earth coming back to Faerûn to visit

Gale (Blackstaff Academy Professor ending)

He was the one to help you get back (with a bit of help from Elminster I suppose)

More than happy to see you (and that his magic worked!)

Will do his best to stay quiet about your little comeback (Tara will do her best to keep him quiet too)

Will offer magic lessons since you're back in the world where The Weave™️ exists (this dude loves magic, won't let an opportunity like that slip, especially when he becomes ✨Professor Dekarios✨)

Will tell you everything that happened in your absence, much like the others

Genuinely happy to have you back, even if it's for a moment

Will cook something, you can prepare an extra pack for faerûnian food from him

Tara demands pets. Just not on the belly.

You're free to spend a while in the Academy, even join some lesson as a guest or a guest teacher

Astarion (vampire spawn in Baldur's Gate ending)

He finds you in the dead of the night, thinking you're one of the bad guys

When he pins you to the ground with a dagger it just feels like the old days

Immediately loosens his grip when he recognizes you

"What in the hells? What are you doi- How did you even do it?!"

Happy to see you as well and does not even need to hide it as he'd usually do

Together you hunt someone that night, for the sake of the old times

You both recall what you've been up to

If you let him drink your blood again he'll be elated

But careful as a babe. This time he'll be good to his words

Surely has some news from the spawn family (if he didn't join them in the Underdark). Reads you some letters from Gur and other spawn. Takes breaks while reading the one from Sebastian. You hug him understandingly

You end up watching the sunrise before the sun is too high and you leave to seek other companions

Wyll & Karlach (yeet into the Avernus ending)

You kind of didn't expect to see them

They went to Avernus after all

They're the ones to spot you

"SOLDIER?! IS THAT YOU?!" are the only words you hear before you're pulled into Mama K's tight hug, unable to let go

Anyway you're not willing to let go. I mean who would want to?

Wyll's surprised too, they're both excited and curious how did you do it.

They were just about to meet his father (obviously), last thing they expected was to see their friend from another world.

You just jump in and go with them, asking how things are going with Karlach's engine, both excited and worried

Finally hearing good news (about the forge) makes you talk about heart surgery again ( @tavshortfortavern thanks for the idea!; also special thanks for inspiring me to write my own headcanons, love Yours!)

You spend the rest of the day meeting with Ulder, training, talking and having a drink in the Blushing Mermaid in the evening with Astarion who 'accidentally' found you

You all almost get too drunk but you don't care, because it's a memorable night

You toast for Gale who pulled it off and thought about it in the first place

Lae'zel (Freeing Githyanki edition)

Also kinda unexpected and brief meeting

You can see she's pleased with meeting you again (even if she's reluctant to show it)

She tries to keep her cool, she's leading a rebellion and most likely has an important meeting here

'Never thought I'd see you. Did you get lost in the realms again?'

After finding out how did you do it she nods in acknowledgement. Probably doesn't want to compliment the wizard

You quickly recall your current state of life and say goodbye, but for longer than usual (a little bit of slavic way of saying goodbye for an hour)

You're sure you spied a smile on her face, but she'd rather die than admit it (if she's with her fellow githyanki warriors)

Shadowheart (both good endings)

Parents freed & alive

She visited Gate for some groceries and maybe running into friends

And exactly both thing happens

She's not sure if she saw who she saw, has to blink and make sure

'You... you're back? How'd you do that?'

'Then it's a fine wine bottle for Gale then. What you've been up to? I was sure I'll never see you again!'

Also turns into a hug mode, girl does not take prisoners

After hearing from you she tells you about her cozy life with her parents

It's pretty much calm, nothing changed much (which is good considering her mother's state)

Can't stop looking at you like you're something magical or just a dream

You grab the groceries and head back to her house where you surprise her parents too

Her mom does not recognise you, but you understand. Her father still shoots out best jokes in this part of galaxy

Coziest evening in a while

Parents freed & gone

Pretty much all of the above but she might have someone on her tail and gets scared you may get hurt (just like in Waterdeep, when you romance Gale she tells you she's been there with someone on her tail exactly)

Gets you under her protection and if you run into any of your companions you're under their protection as well

If not, you'll just happily walk around the city and have some dinner and recall your life after you left Faerûn

But you could easily tell she still misses her parents, which makes you turn into a hug mode too

You may even spend an evening drinking somewhere secluded (beach maybe?)

Jaheira, Minsc & Boo

'The cub has found its way back. Though 'how?' still remains a question'

You explain and she admires how far the wizard has come to get you back for a visit

Minsc does not understand it, but is glad to have otherwordly friend back

Same with Boo, he's vicious but not towards Tav who occasionally fed him with extra snacks

Yes, hugs are mandatory even if none of them will show it (little hug for Boo as well!)

Jaheira is still busy with Harpers network rebuilding, might have to order few of them around as you speak

Takes you to her home where the kids also get a fucking aneurysm because they were sure you coming back was not possible

When you tell her your last life events she looks proud

But, like, tough auntie proud

'Seems like that world of yours is in the good hands'

You try your best not to go with explaining how it isn't so easy back there

Generally a day with the Busy Mom™️, the Madman and his Rodent

Halsin

After you made your little tour at the Gate & Waterdeep it was time for the *trip*

You did your best not to show on the road, just for the sake of surprise

Though you were nervous about the animals you've met

Not because they could eat you, but you remember the wildshape

No bears though, you feel safe

When you reach Moonrise you use every little stealth skill Astarion has taught you

Though your knees protest against that

You spot him somewhere near The Waning Moon, fixing something

Your sneak behind him would make Astarion proud as fuck

Daddy Bear doesn't notice a thing (or so you hope)

With only few seconds to act you just tap his shoulder

He turns back expecting a kid perhaps, but instead his eyes widen upon seeing his old (young?) friend

The one he was sadly sure never to see again

He's not quite sure what to say for a few seconds so you just pull him into a hug

He hugs back with his and probably Silvanus' might

He's just so excited, but fortunately doesn't wildshape (iykyk)

He's also impressed in Gale's skill (even if it involves Elminster)

Eager to show you around, proud of his work, but don't you dare bring it up yourself! (unless you want him to turn into a mouse or just threaten you to do so, even as a joke)

You almost don't recognise the place without the curse

Thaniel & Oliver take you by surprise in turn, but it's also a lovely reunion. Without the curse they're flourishing and thriving, just like the nature around

Whole. Fucking. Ton. Of. Kids.

And stray people willing to start a new life here

But they're all happy and taken care of. It's loud, it's messy, it's chaotic, but it's lovely.

You can easily see Halsin put his heart into that and truly found his place in the world

'My friend. Would you like to stay?' his voice radiates with hope, and if you say yes, he's even more happy. If you can not, he understands

He's surprised you remember about the old druid. You ensure him you never forgot

You help around with the kids & the place, maybe even tell them a story or two to let Halsin rest (even if he's sleeping behind you in his bear form)

You may also get back with druidic magic here, even if you won't use it in your world, Halsin would gladly spend time teaching you and recalling your latest life events

You also visit Art's Grave if he passed away (which could occur)

NPCs REACTIONS WILL JOIN SOON

[redlittlefoxari]

Astrion Epilogue: An Adventure in Making a Life

Chapter Six: On the road with secrets

Summary: The Party gets suspicious when Tav suddenly starts having morning sickness. Tav and Astsrion try to explain the sickness without giving away that Tav is Seven Weeks pregnant.

Warnings: NSFW+18, smut, pregnancy, blood, violence, fluff, angst.

Relationship: Astarion X Tav

Characters: Astarion (Baldur's Gate) Karlach (Baldur's Gate)Gale (Baldur's Gate) Wyll (Baldur's Gate) Shadowheart (Baldur's Gate)Lae'zel (Baldur's Gate) Tav (Baldur's Gate) Jaheira (Baldur's Gate) Halsin(Baldur's Gate)

Master List

Seven weeks pregnant 

It had been a week since you started the journey to water deep, and today was the worst day. You awoke to your stomach reeling and barely made out your tent flaps before last night's dinner made its way up your throat and lips. You spent several moments heaving up the dinner Astarion made for you. The red contents thankfully looked like wine and not the blood mixed with cherry juice you had last night. You prayed that your friends would think you had too much wine last night and not question you much about your morning sickness. 

Astarion emerged from the tent in the middle of your heaving and rubbed small circles around your back in soothing comfort. There wasn't much he could do for you now but give you some form of comfort until this passed. 

At the commotion, the others started to stir from their tents and eyed the two of you with worry. Shadowhearts eyebrow was raised in suspicion a question forming in her mind. You weren't seen with any alcohol last night and had refused when she offered you a drink of her stash last night, claiming you brought your own. By the look on her face, you gaged that she was playing back the night's events in her mind. 

"You know how it is, Shadowheart?" Astarion was quick: "One too many glasses of wine and a night of passion upsets the stomach after." 

You let out a huff of air and whipped your lips. Your mouth tasted like cherries and blood. Cherry juice had the same metallic taste of blood but cut with an edge of sweetness that you have been craving this pregnancy. You still ate other foods because Astarion wouldn't let you eat cake and other sweet confections, but they were still what you craved the most. 

"Yup… Just too much good wine and… passion." You gave Astarion a sideways glare. Did he have to add the passion part? You just got back a sly smile as a response. 

"What vintage was it?" 

"What?" You weren't expecting to get interrogated. 

"I want to get a bottle when we return to the city. If it did that to you, I'm sure it's robust." She started to close the distance, avoiding the puddle you made. 

"I don't remember… I was really drunk by the time…"

"Where is the bottle that will tell us." She looked over your shoulder. 

"Do you think this is the time to question her about wine?" Karlach stepped in to save you. "She just got sick all over herself, and you're more worried about the vintage so you can get drunk better? You need to check yourself into a program, I swear."

Gods, you loved this big beautiful teifling. Shadowheart was right to be suspicious, but Astarion and you agreed that you wouldn't tell you about the pregnancy until you hit the second trimester at fourteen weeks. The perfect timing for the party. You would party to celebrate Gale, and then after the celebration, when everything would die down, and the rest of the guests would leave. It was just you, Karlach, Wyll, Gale, Shadowheart, and Astarion; you would tell them the good news. But for now, too many things could go wrong. There were too many unknowns; it was better to keep it under wraps for now, lying when you needed to. 

"I don't have a problem. I didn't see her drinking last night." Shadowhert turned to face Karlach, who had a good two feet on her. 

"Their tent has flaps, so unless you can peer through solid objects, my guess is that she drank the wine behind it. Now, can we get a move on? We'er burring daylight." Karlach turned to hers and Wyll's tent to start packing it away. 

"If we find the bottle or remember the vintage, we will be sure to let you know, Shadowheart," Astarion said with a cool bit of ice in his words. 

"I'm sure you will… feel better. We have a long journey today." With that, shadowheart walked away to her own tent. 

"She was always suspicious." Astarion's eyes bore into the back of her head.

"She was trained too; let's just pack up and get ready to leave; hopefully, when we get onto the road, they will forget about this, and next time I have morning sickness, I'll try to throw up more quietly and in the bushes." You turned and walked into your tent with Astarion at your heels. 

"She's like a dog with a bone. She won't let this go, but when we stop in the next town, we can slip away and buy some bottles of wine. That may sway her. She can't see us buy them." You nodded at his words. It might work. 

"Okay, we'll do that in the next town, but that's still fifteen days away. What do we do if I get sick before then?" Your question hung in the air for a few seconds. 

"Food poisoning?" He shrugged. "We are cooking everything over a fire on sticks found in the woods. Who knows what things are on them."

"Okay, we'll go with that for now, but we need to think of something else." You gave him a light kiss on his lips, not wanting him to taste too much of what you regurgitated. 

Before you could pull away, Astarion grabbed your wrist and pulled you into him, causing you to gasp, allowing him to pull you into a complex, demanding kiss that searched your mouth with his tongue. You moaned into the kiss as the feel of him inside your mouth awoke something in you that you didn't know you could feel after throwing up everything in your stomach. 

Astarion ended the kiss and placed the hand that wasn't around your wrist so that it cupped your face on one side. "I would kiss you even if you tasted like garlic, and it would burn me from the inside out. Never think I wouldn't want to kiss you like that for a moment."

Your cheeks felt hot at his decoration of love and devotion. You knew he felt that way, but this baby made your emotions go haywire. Mood swings were becoming more familiar to you, and it didn't help that something was getting bigger every time you looked in the mirror. Your hips were fuller, your breasts bigger, and it was getting more and more challenging to get into your armor by the day. You were feeling insecure about everything that made you who you are. 

"I know it's just… This baby is changing me, and whenever I look in the mirror, I see a different person." You looked away from his pricing stare, his red eyes seeming like they were looking into your soul. 

"You know what I see when I look at you?" He pulled your gaze back towards his eyes. "I see the beautiful woman who is carrying my child inside her, and whenever I look at you, I have to fight every fiber of my being not to rip your clothes off and have you in front of the gods and everyone." You placed a gentle kiss on your lips. "You are the most beautiful thing I've ever seen besides myself." 

You snorted a laugh and were fighting back tears. 

"But you are even before me." His hand moved from your wrist to your belly. "This is a gift, making you more beautiful by the day, my love." 

"Thank you, Astarion." You rubbed tears out of your eyes. 

"Don't thank me for telling you the truth. Now, let's get you something to eat before we start packing up and leaving. We can't have you starving." Astarion gave you one more kiss, choosing to place it on your forehead before he turned to his pack and pulled out a jar of chilled blood mixed with some cherry juice. The jars were wrapped in cloths woven in frost giant hair that radiated cold energy, keeping whatever was wrapped in them cold and thus significantly increasing the time things could be kept. 

"This was such a clever idea. We should paton this and sell it around Baldur's Gate. We could be rich." Astarion handed you your jar.

"It just came to me one day. If we did sell this, we would probably never have to go on another adventure again. We could buy a big house in the upper city and raise our child." You slowly sipped your breakfast, fearing that it would come up to greet you again if you didn't pace yourself. 

"Now that does sound nice." Astarion grabbed a jar of blood for himself and began doing the same. The both of you are thinking of the future that you would share with your selves and your unborn child. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

By the end of the day, your feet felt beyond swollen. Twenty-four miles later, you finally reached the ruins that would be your campsite for the night. They were of an old temple to a god long past dead and gone, but the centuries still held many secrets. The stones were crumbling, but they would make do for just one night as the likelihood of the whole thing collapsing was a slim possibility. 

"Are you doing alright?" You heard Wyll's voice as you stopped just before the entrance of the ruins to take off your boots and rub your tired feet. 

"Oh yeah, I'm doing fine; it's been a while since I walked this much. My feet seemed to have lost their natural calluses." You plastered a smile on your face, hoping it would convince him of your authenticity.

"I know what you mean; Karlach and I have slowed down during the years. We still go out on adventures, but for the most part, we try to stay home and relax." Wyll returned your smile with one of his own. 

The two of you chatted while the others made their way farther along the trail leading to the ruins. Karlach and Astarion were deep in conversation about the many things they had been up to and the beasts they had slain over the last fifty years. Time moved differently in the hells than it did on this plain, so there was a lot to talk about and catch up with. 

Shadowheart just listened and made comments every once in a great while. You knew that what happened this morning was still bawling at her. She knew something was up, and it wasn't that you got so drunk that you made yourself sick. You just hoped that she would respect your privacy and not investigate the subject any further. You were leaning towards her doing as when she had her secrets about Shar and the prism when you first met; you didn't pepper her with questions. You let her open up to you in her own time, and she respected you for it. She would give you the same courtesy you had hoped for. 

"We should probably catch back up to the others." You slipped your boots back on and got up from the log, shouldering your pack once again as you started to make your way to where the others were.

"Right, I'm ready to make camp for the night and sleep! I'm getting too old for this." Wyll did the same and joined you. 

"Nonsense, I think you have another forty years of adventuring left!" The two of you laughed. 

"Gods, I hope not. I want to buy some land outside the city and just live." 

The way Wyll spoke made you think of your plans. You resisted the urge to place your hand on your stomach. They would be a dead giveaway, and as far as your friends knew, you didn't want to have children and couldn't as long as Astarion was your partner. So, no one talked of children; none of you currently have children. At least none that you knew of. 

You didn't hear the arrows as they came towards you. Still, you felt the impact as they embedded themselves in your shoulder and stomach. They sent you careening toward the ground. Your back hit the ground, and you heard Astarion scream your name, terror in his voice. 

Bandits surrounded you and Wyll. Five of them total were probably there to see if they could find the secrets of the ruins and thought your little group was too. So they were going to take care of you. That way, they didn't need to share. 

Wyll produced his rapier and put it through the heart of one of the bandits. At the same time, Karlach, Shadowheart, and Astarion raced to where the two of you were located. You slowly made your way up from prone, your shoulder throbbing in pain from the arrow protruding out from it. You looked for an opening to run; you were skilled with a bow, and close combat was not your strongest skill. You saw an opening between Wyll and the bandit he downed and dashed beyond them. 

Astarion made quick work of one bandit ripping the throat and sucking him dry of blood. Crimson dripped from his chin, and he was a sight to behold. Red eyes seemed to glow as he locked eyes with you and motioned for you to run.

 You gave him a nod; as you turned your back, holding your shoulder, you heard a familiar spell being cast. Hail of thorns. This time, you listened to the hundreds of thorns coming towards you. It seemed that your running away made you the prime target since you were not paying attention to anyone and would be the most distracted. You braced yourself for the impact of the thorns, but they never came when you turned to see why Astarion was shielding you with his body. 

You heard a wet crunch as Karlach Sliced the last bandit with her great axe, and the others came towards you and Astarion. He looked like a porcupine. Long thorns were jutting out from his back, but he didn't seem to notice as he touched you all over. 

"Are you alright?" He touched the arrow that was embedded in your stomach, a look of terror etched on his face. 

"I don't know…" You knew what you looked like. Scared, the two of you had no way of knowing what was going on inside you or if your child was okay. Fear gripped your heart, and you tried not to cry. 

"The two of you look alright to me." Shadowheart looked confused at your words. "Let's get these arrows and thorns out of the two of you, and I'll heal you. It will be like that never happened."

The two of you ignored her and just stared into each other's eyes. You were frozen with fear. Astarion placed his hand on your stomach, making it look like he would pull the arrow free, but he was looking for any sign. Anything that would let him know that the baby was okay that they were alive and well, and the arrow missed him. 

There was nothing, and you saw a look pass across his face. He schooled his features, and you could tell that he was trying to concentrate on something. "I hear it…. I hear their heartbeat." He spoke at a volume that was barely a whisper. "I hear the heartbeat." 

The tears that you were holding back free from your eyes, and you couldn't make them stop. Astarion pressed a kiss to your lips and then one on your forehead. The fear that gripped your heart released, and you grabbed the arrow, pulling it from your body but to have an excuse to hold your stomach. 

The other three exchanged a look of confusion. "The two of you have gotten into worse scraps than that…. I do not see how this is getting such a reaction." Karlach spoke, her voice edged with worry. 

"Yes, well, we always do this when the other gets hurt. Plus, I needed to find out what those arrows were tipped with. I had to give her a full examination." 

Astarion's statement didn't do much to quell their confusion, but they couldn't argue with it very much either. He allowed Shadowheart to pull the needles out only after she healed you first. She did so, and then you and she pulled the hundreds of pins out individually. 

By the time the five of you made camp, the night was falling, and you forgot the tents and instead decided to sleep on the ground since the ruins provided enough cover. The rest of the night was quiet as the others gave you and Astarion a wide berth, not sure what to say after yours and Astarion's weird reaction to you getting shot earlier. 

"That was too close." Astarion came and sat beside you. 

"I know, but we couldn't have known they would attack." 

"We should have assumed someone was here. This place…. It attracts people like that." You took Astarion's hand.

"We'll just have to assume that from now on. We got too comfortable around friends." You looked at the others in the camp, and they all looked away from you, trying to look casual, like they weren't just watching the two of you. 

"I swear these people are so nosy."

"They are concerned that our reactions today were a bit weird for someone who doesn't know what's happening." You looked back to Astarion. "They just care about us."

*tisk* Astarion clicked his tongue. "All this love is making me queasy." He stood up. "Let's go to bed before I get sick." 

You rolled your eyes and took his hand. The two of you made your way back to camp. You pulled a jar of your "wine" from your bag and took a long drag off it so Shadowheart would see. Earlier that day, you snuck over to her tent and found an empty bottle of wine. You quickly snatched it and poured your "wine" into the bottle. She gave you a nod. 

"Glad you're feeling better." She closed the distance. "If you need to talk to someone about anything, don't hesitate." She gave your hand a quick squeeze. "You helped me get free of Shar and helped me find out who I really was. I will help you through anything. You are my friend." 

"I know, and when I'm ready to talk, I will, but now is not the right time." You said as you returned her smile. 

She nodded at your words and looked towards Astarion. "Until you are ready as well."

"I'll be sure to let you know when I'm ready to braid each other's hair and trade this tale, but my lips are sealed for now." 

Shadowheart gave your hand one last squeeze and walked to her bed roll. You and Astarion did the same, lying beside each other with your hands on your stomachs under the covers where the others couldn't see. 

[waterdeep-weavemoss]

Tension

Day 16. Astarion x Tav.

Doe was the last to leave. The others had gone up to bed, taking whatever rooms in the tavern they could find. Gale and Shadowheart had sequestered themselves away, Wyll and Karlach were last seen giggling over some bawdy joke, and Lae'zel had pulled some poor unsuspecting tiefling girl up to her room. As far as she knew, Astarion had slunk off- left the tavern entirely, perhaps in search of a meal. So Doe languished by the fire, nursing a glass of red wine. It was sweet with stone fruits, but its edge was sharp, and she made a face as it went down.

She lost track of time entirely, watching the flames die down. The distant sounds of talk and... other activities floated down from overhead, but she ignored them. It was peaceful, alone. Nobody expected anything from her, nobody needed her, nobody had to watch her back. She could simply be who she was, and let the thousand masks she wore each day fall away.

She felt him return before she saw him. 'You were out a long time.'

'Yes, well,' he said softly, padding over to take the seat opposite her. 'I had to clear my head.'

'Mmm. It's been a tough few days.'

He watched her with burning red eyes. 'Exceedingly.'

'This will all be done soon. Then we can go back to our lives.'

'Well, if it could hurry,' he groused, crossing his arms. 'Your presence is starting to get painful.'

'Excuse me?' Doe felt her hackles raise, calm dissipating in a rush of indignation. 'The hells does that mean?'

'Oh darling don't be obtuse. As if you haven't noticed. I think you do it on purpose.'

''Do what?' Doe's voice raised as she got to her feet. 'Do tell me, Astariion, because I'm pretty sure nothing I do is good enough for you. Enlighten me.'

'Don't be foolish.' He fixed her with a sharp glare, slowly rose to his feet.

'Hey, you insulted me-'

'Gods, woman, you're infuriating sometimes! You have no fucking idea! None at all!' His voice was urgent, exasperated.

'So tell me!' she cried.

'I'll do one better,' he growled, stalking forward. 'I'll show you.'

And then his hands were on her shoulders and pushing her back against the wall, mouth falling to hers before she could protest. She whimpered, blooming beneath him to feel his cool tongue in her mouth, the sharp sting of fang against lip. His hands slid down her arms to grasp her wrists, pinning her with his body to the rough stone. 'You have tormented me since I met you,' he breathed, pulling back. 'You're a clever girl. You must know the affect you have on me, you wretched, beautiful, treacherous little minx.'

'I had no idea,' she gasped. 'I didn't think-'

'Clearly,' he said, kissing her hard, desperately, moaning passionately as he grasped her hips. 'Do you want this?'

'Yes.'

'Oh, sweet girl,' he purred. 'I'm going to ruin you.'

He picked her up, walked back to fall into the chair by the fire, holding her securely in his lap. With quick fingers, he unlaced her shirt, pushed it from her shoulders, tossed it aside. He made just as quick work of her trousers and underthings, wholly focused on the task of baring her body. And then he was freeing himself, kissing every part of her he could reach as she sank down onto him. He held a hand over her mouth, eyes glittering wickedly as she cried out into his palm.

'Fuck, you took me so well. Can you stay quiet, pretty girl? Beautiful as your voice is, hearing you sing will have to wait until we're less... public.'

She gripped his shoulders, his free hand bruising on her hip, the fingers on her lips slipping between her teeth. He watched, driving up into her forcefully in long, feral thrusts. She cried out around his fingers, the sound choked off. Her eyes rolled back and he grinned, fangs glinting in the firelight. As she came, he leaned forward to sink his teeth into her breast, drinking his fill even as he chased his own pleasure, the hand on her hip sliding up her spine. He tipped into orgasm holding the nape of her neck, groaning into her skin. His tongue licked at the wounds he'd left; he gazed up at her with half-lidded eyes, drunk on her blood and her body.

'So good for me,' he said, removing his fingers from her mouth. 'Tomorrow night, perhaps you'll be even better, hmm?'

Tags:

@bluerosetarot @dansnotavampire @further-than-forever

@forget-me-maybe @poetryvampire @sasha199 @wandawillow

@boufsy @owlseeyoulaterpal @lanafofana @amorgansgal

@aryancunin @miradelletarot @marlowethebard

@crimson-and-lavender @reeseykins @medra-gonbites

@roguishcat @weaverofnetheril @galedekarioswifey @hyperfixationstation128 @lastlight-inn

@astarryvamp @feedthepheasants @dabigstinky @dreamingofthewild @ladyofcrowsandcoffee

@femmefuck @spooky-lil-bee

[day-drawn-blog]

Part VI : It's not my fault. I'm not to blame. These ain't my sins. I broke my chains. - "I want to live"

Back to some angst before the good stuff.

Pairing: Astarion x Reader -- This is set in Act I

Tags: angst, fluff, sadness, angst, fluff, then maybe eventually smut because I do love that

Part I. Crowned light moon of mine - I found you too soon

Part II : Lace your heart with mine Let your sleeping soul take flight

Part III : maybe tonight I'll rest in peace

Part IV : There is more to do and I still want to live

Part V : our futures bound, our bodies known

Part VII: You are not mine and am I truly yours?

Part VIII: Your blood like wine, I wanted in.

Part IX: I'll welcome my sentence and give you my penance

Part X : I can't go yet...don't let me die

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Next morning. You wrapped some bandages around your neck. Your armor should cover any bite marks. You knew no one knew yet. And you didn't want to give his secret away till he was ready. 

You stepped out, pushing away any thoughts of last night. He was putting his armor on. Very focused. The party soon got going. Unlike other times, it was Astarion who was trailing behind the rest this time. 

Curious. You thought.

You glanced back at him a few times. He was never looking at you. You were traveling in the underdark. As you were passing by a group of statues, you were all ambushed by a spectator. You found yourself unable to deal as much damage as you normally did. You were definitely enfeebled after last night.

"Keep up, would you." Astarion chided as he swiped an enemy right next to you. "And whose fault is that" you snarked back at him. He said nothing, looked a bit displeased at your accusation, but continued to support you in combat. 

At least he is taking responsibility.

After the battle was won, he left without a word. Again. That night everyone camped near one of the pools by the several waterfalls. You decided to wash up, and found him there by himself. If his earlier behavior was any indication he would not be inclined to talk now, you reasoned. You turned to leave when he called you. 

"I'm done. Il be leaving". 

You turned around. He wrapped a long cloth around his waist. And walked away. You looked at his muscular upper body. There were some carvings on his back, illuminated by the moon. Strange. You thought. He kept walking away without as much as another glance at you. 

He wanted nothing to do with you. 

This was probably your fault. You thought as you stepped in. You should have not crossed the line. You were friends before. Now you are strangers. A momentary temptation had cost you what had taken so long to earn. Your only hope was that he would soon crave your blood. You prayed for it. You didn't want to lose him. You were ready to accept him for everything that he was. 

Including that he loved someone else.

Surely he loved her. Why else would he be so conflicted, angry, at last night. He felt he did her wrong. Surely. That's why he doesn't want to talk to you. Because he blames you. For tempting him. And you did. Despite promising yourself you won't take what belonged to her, you did try. You reached out and grabbed him. Greedily tried to have himself. 

You failed yourself. 

A few days passed. Nothing changed. Astarion was still cold and distant. Your heart was giving up hope, slowly. As he showed no signs of visiting you at night for your blood. He would ignore you during your short rests. And during the nights. He was indifferent during combat too. 

You let him be.

Perhaps you hurt him somehow. And you wanted to make amends. When you all met a trader, at the myconid colony, you decided to gift your friends some nice things. A nice armor and a morningstar for shadowheart. Enchanted helmet for Karlach. You found a pendant that would cast spells, necrotic damage and fear. 

You gave those to Astarion. 

"To help you in combat". You said. He looked up. Accepted them and proceeded to study them. "Thank you" he said in his deep voice. "Of course. I'm buying, for everyone". You reassured him. Then walked away, hoping he would feel happy. But you dared not look back. You didn't want to seem, desperate for his approval. 

"What are you buying your lover this time?"

Karlach teased. You thought she was teasing you. Shocked you looked at her only to find her talking to Shadowheart. Right. No one thinks of you and Astarion because no one knows. Because he didn't tell anyone. Because there is nothing to tell in the first place. Your heart was wrenching with every thought.

"I remember the spell amulet he bought you him last time. You lovers and your lovey dovey hearts, it's so cute!" continued Karlach.

"I supposed we used to be. But of late, I do not know if we can call each other that". Your sharply looked at her! What?! "What? Did he break your heart?! I always knew that smooth talker couldn't be trusted. Didn't I tell you! I'm going to talk to him tonight" Karlach huffed. 

"No need". Shadowheart stopped her. 

"I don't think there was "love" between us to begin with. I think we were both ... enjoying...each other. And now, we have had our fill". "Good" chimed laezel. "Nothing to distract you in battle anymore, or disturb your nights rest". "I suppose... " Agreed shadowheart. With a tinge of sadness laced in her voice. You felt sad for her. You wanted to comfort her. Maybe you will, later. And be comforted in return...which probably won't happen, because unlike her, your burden was yours alone. 

No one to share with. No one knew.

You were fighting duerger on pair of boats. You all thought the battle was easy until someone screamed. A duergar cast Crown of Madness on Shadowheart. She was right next to Astarion at that time. She hit him hard. Several times. He could only protect himself in defense.

But she kept going. 

Everyone else watched helplessly as Shadowheart's morning star struck him mercilessly. His mouth was bleeding. He arms took the brunt of him. He fell to his knees. Bloodied and beaten. You prayed she wouldn't use her burn spell. None of you could take her down. She was one of yours. Everyone looked on horrified. Helplessly. Terrified, as Astarion was steps away from falling in the water. 

You have to save him. You just do.

Frantically, ignoring the enemy beside you, you blasted the one that cast the spell on Shadowheart. She snapped out of it and fell unconscious. Astarion caught her. It was too strong a spell to bear. Astarion had lost a lot of blood. Karlach rage killed most of the people around you and the battle was wrapped up soon. You all needed to carry them to camp and tend to him. 

He was barely there. 

In his tent that night, you and Karlach and Halsin spent hours tending to his several wounds. Afterwards you stayed behind to clean and dress them all as Halsin had instructed. Halsin left to make more medicine. Karlach went to make food. You looked at his sorry state. Halsin had eased his pain at least. You hoped he would recover soon. Shadowheart was still unconscious in her tent.

One by one, you tended to all his wounds. His face. His neck and chest. His hands had suffered the most of them. Cleaning, applying salve, wrapping in linen. You took his arm, and placed it next to your face. You could feel warm tears welling up. His arm was so bruised. You kissed one of his fingers. Then hugged his arm as your tears fell silently. The silence was comforting. You loved this man. There was no denying now. He didn't. And you forgave him for that.

It felt wonderful to admit that. Honesty. Felt good. You felt at peace. You would not feel guilty anymore. You loved everyone of your allies. You didn't take to him at first. And he is mischievous, chaotic and unpredictable. But he has shown you love and care, in his own way. And you respected him for that.

"Where is he"? 

Your thoughts were interrupted by a frantic Shadowheart who ran inside. You stood up and got out of her way. She knelt next to him. Broke down and put her head on his chest and started crying. "I'm sorry, I'm sorry " she wailed. "This was me. I did this".. Karlach was right behind. "Told her he was not awake, she didn't listen". Karlach shrugged at you. "I gotta go back. Holler if you need me."

You looked at shadowheart.

You could understand her guilt. The crown of madness is a cruel spell indeed. You had once seen a githyanki soldier attack her commander to whom she had sworn an oath. It's difficult to bear. You wanted to console her. You moved closer to them.

"You are awake, my love?" 

What? You both looked at Astarion. He had opened his eyes. In obvious pain. Frowning. As if he didn't know where he  was. Slowly, wincing in pain, he turned around and saw you both. You standing.  Her kneeling in front. Crying. With one arm, he slowly placed it against her back. He managed a weak smile at her. At which she broke down even more. Her cries were hard to hear. You were unsure what to do. 

Awkward you stood there as her cries filled the tent. Astarion closed his eyes again. You decided to pack up all the medicine and bandages. You needed to change the water anyway. When you looked up at him again, you met his eyes. 

Piercing eyes, smouldering in ...anger? You tried to read. But you couldn't. He was looking at you, while his arm was around shadowheart who was crying on his chest. He seemed displeased... What did he want? Whatever it was, you felt, unwanted. Like ...the third wheel... You couldn't help but smirk a bit. Familiar. Yes. But I can be the bigger person. 

I will leave, because I love you.

And you left the tent. 

Part VII: You are not mine and am I truly yours?