#and ngl that helped me calm down bc i was so focused on trying to describe my pain that i forgot about it lmao

[kourota]

being a writer is just thinking that anything and everything is great writing material. people watching while you wait for your bus? writing material. experiencing something that's gonna scar you for life? writing material. getting chased by chickens and running for your life? writing material.

[loud-sturniolos]

Crush, 1

A Chris Sturniolo fic

SUMMARY:

Chris finally realises he has a crush on his brothers best friend, and once he acknowledges it, the universe seems to be hellbent on making things awkward.

WARNINGS:

kinda cringe ngl😻, uses of Y/N, loosely based on Crush Culture by Conan Gray, sexual themes + male masturbation but no actual sex!(..yet), pet names, very badly written smut, not proof read, kind of a cliffhanger (bc I didnt know how to end it💀)

TROPES:

Friends to lovers, one bed, best friends brother.

A/N: I haven’t written in a while, writers block and depression kicking my ass rn🥲 Btw, Matt comforting Chris is so shit, im not good at writing stuff like that; sorryyy

It was 2:43AM, Chris, Matt, Nick & Y/N were still up, the TV played quietly in the background as they all sat in the living room.

Nick let out a loud yawn, tapping Y/N’s forearm. “When are you gonna go to bed?” He asks curiously, “Uh, I’ll go do my skincare now so we can sleep soon.” Nick hums in acknowledgment, getting up and following Y/N to his bathroom to help her with skincare.

After a few minutes of Matt and Chris being alone, the younger brother sits up and looks at Matt over his phone. “Matt?” He says gently, a hint of nervousness in his voice. “What’s up, Chris?” Matt mumbles, still mostly focused on playing Clash of Clans on his phone. “I think I like Y/N.” The younger brunet blurts out, not knowing how to start the conversation. Matt’s eyes widen, immediately his eyes go to Chris’s subtly flushed face. Matt stays silent for a moment, unsure of what to say.

“Is.. that a bad thing?” He finally says in a caring tone after a beat of silence, “I..” Chris stutters, staring down at his lap as he thinks. “I don’t want it to be a bad thing.” He replies. “Then why don’t you tell her?” Matt has now moved to sit next to Chris, rubbing his younger brothers arm comfortingly. “I can’t do that. What if it ruins our friendship? What if she doesn’t like me back? What if I don’t actually like her? What if I me-“ Chris starts rambling anxiously, which Matt cuts off by shoving his hand over Chris’s mouth. “Dude. Calm down. It’s fine, you’re fine.” He says bluntly, but clearly with brotherly love. Chris mumbles a “sorry..” through Matt’s hand, “Chris, shes your best friend. If she does, it wont ruin your friendship. Promise.” Before Chris could reply, Y/N walked back downstairs. “Chris, I’m using your shower.” She says casually as she walks through the room, then towards Chris’s bathroom as Nick’s shower can be heard being turned on elsewhere in the house.

Matt stood up after a few minutes of silence, “I’m gonna go to bed.” He said, glancing at Chris. “Me too, night Matt.” Chris stands up too, both the men walking to their respective rooms.

After half an hour, Chris hears his bedroom door open. He glances up and sees Y/N stood at the door in a bra and pyjama shorts, and all the blood immediately starts rushing down south, and to his pale cheeks. He cleared his throat, “Uh.. can I help you with anything?” He mumbled, trying not to stare right at his best friends chest which was on full display. “I forgot my pyjama shirt, can I borrow one of your shirts?” She asked, oblivious to his distraction. “Can you not borrow one of Nick’s?” He says with a raised eyebrow, but still climbing out the bed and getting her a shirt. “I’m pretty sure Nick’s asleep, I don’t want to wake him up.” She replies, walking over to take the shirt out Chris’s hands and pull it over her head. A subtle smile tugged at Chris’s lips, “So, where are you sleeping then?” He asked curiously, glancing down at the shorter girl as she readjusted her hair out the shirt. “I’ll just sleep on the sofa.” The girl replied with a nonchalant shrug. Chris raised an eyebrow and gently grabbed her elbow, pulling her just a bit closer. “You can sleep in my bed, it’s big enough for 2. I don’t want you to sleep on the uncomfy couch.” He said softly, smiling slightly at the girls slightly flustered expression. “..okay.” She mumbled shyly, following Chris to the bed.

“I like seeing you in my shirt.” Chris said without thinking, a blush immediately covering his and Y/N’s face. Y/N stayed silent, unsure of how to reply. Chris stayed silent too, quietly cursing to himself in embarrassment. After a few minutes, Chris can hear Y/N’s breathing softening. He glances over to see her peacefully asleep, and so he decided to try sleep too.

The next morning, Chris wakes up first. He pauses when he feels a weight on top of him, looking down he sees Y/N with her head on his shoulder, one arm around his waist, and one leg thrown over his hips, her knee placed right on top of his erection. Chris’s face turned a bright red, a small groan leaving his lips as he tried to subtly shift Y/N off him, but of course, Y/N wakes up.

“Fuck..” Chris whispers to himself, gently nudging Y/Ns knee off his crotch and making sure to keep his throbbing hard on away from her. “G’morning..” The girl grumbled, clearly still half asleep. “Morning.. I need a shower.” Chris says, standing up and grabbing a shirt before bolting out his room and towards his bathroom.

Chris quickly strips and gets into the shower, he debates for a moment about turning the shower cold, but he decides not too. Instead, his hand trails down and slowly wraps around his shaft, a low moan leaving his plump pink lips as he slowly starts to stroke it.

His mind is full of fantasies, and memories, all of Y/N. He starts to stroke faster, harder, his hips thrusting into his fist. His free hand holds up his weight against the shower wall, biting his bottom lip to muffle the moans. “F- fuck, ma..” He groaned as he finished, the sticky white substance going down the drain with the water quickly.

A soft sigh leaves Y/N’s lips as she stands up from Chris’s bed, she wandered out Chris’s room after brushing her hair. She heard the shower turn off in Chris’s bathroom and decided to do her skincare in his bathroom instead of Nick’s, so she went towards the door and knocked gently. “Yeah?” Chris yelled through the door, assuming it was Matt or Nick. Y/N walked in without thinking, only to be met with Chris naked stepping out the shower. Both paused, a bright red spreading across Chris’s pale cheeks and up his ears. Y/N, after getting over the shock, tried her best to not look at Chris’s on-display crotch. Chris scrambled and grabbed a towel as Y/N turned and quickly left the room, yelling a “sorry!” as she bolted down the hall. Chris quickly tugged his boxers and sweatpants on before bolting after Y/N. “Wait- Y/N!” He yelled after her.

@sturnioloshacker @sturnsbabie (hope y’all don’t mind being tagged😞)

PART 2 ::

[gigidragonbbxxx]

musings on meditative prompts

the most profound question I have ever asked myself is what do I assume?

again. What do I assume?

I remember the first time. I simply mused, "What do I assume?" after some random tiktok video. And then it all came crashing down on me. What do I assume? About life? About reality?

So I took a deep breath, decided I was gonna do this - and began to build the world of my assumptions brick by brick.

I assume that the reality I experience is tangible

I assume that the physical vessel I occupy needs oxygen

I assume my habitat has oxygen readily available

I assume the law of gravity

etc.

I just slowly checked all the things I really assumed to be true bc they were in front of me. I affirmed these things as I observed them or became conscious of them. And then I started to focus on myself.

I assume that my name is Gigi.

I assume that I am a girl

I assume that this is my house

etc.

And then when it came to stuff I really wanted to change I began to affirm in the same way I affirmed the previous facts.

I assume that I am the prettiest wherever I go.

I assume that I am unforgettable and irresistible

I assume my SP is my soulmate

I assume I have a lot of money

I assume that I have my desired body

etc.

By the time I was done ngl I was buzzzzingggg. I felt electric. I felt focused and powerful. I think it was sort of relieving to be able to focus on reality without focusing on the parts of it that I didn't want. I felt realigned with feeling like the operant power. Sometimes when I see the advice of "ignore the 3D", I have a tendency to panic and suddenly try to ignore everything (seriously Gigi whyyy) so this helped me calm down and meditate on what I really wanted.

thanks for reading some thoughts of mine, xx, gigi

[kyovtani]

𝐛𝐚𝐜𝐤 𝐭𝐨 𝐥𝐢𝐟𝐞 – 𝐤𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐭𝐚𝐧𝐢 𝐤𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐚𝐫𝐨𝐮 (𝟐)

— pairing: Kyoutani Kentarou x female Reader

— genre: smut, angst, little bit of fluff to keep the balance; tattoo artist!kyoutani, inexperienced!reader, strangers to lovers!AU, SLOW BURN

— word count: 9.6k

— warnings: swearing, mentions of infidelity and violence, as well as the consumption of drugs and alcohol; smut: corruption kink, degradation and dumbification, dacryphilia, praising, spitting, (soft) dom!kyou, oral (m. receiving), fingering, dry humping, unprotected sex (dont do that kids), impreg kink, iwaoi say hi-

— (A/N: and here’s part two! thank you SO much for all the love you sent my way after i published the first part. ngl i was a little nervous bc i thought it was boring and not interesting at all but you guys easily pushed me out of that hole so thank you for everything. i love and appreciate you with my whole heart. all the love, zade xx)

[ part one ]

— summary: after fucking up, you make it your mission to get him back..(im so bad at this pls just- okay.)

"He's not picking up, Hana", you say, another soft cry falling from your lips before you bury your face in your pillow.

“Once in my fucking life a guy treats me good and the way I've always wanted to be treated and I had to fuck it up. Why the fuck am I like this, Hana? Why can I not enjoy one fucking good thing in my fucking mediocre life", the profanities keep coming just like the tears and the amount of frustration and anger rushing through your veins is nowhere near normal anymore.

"Calm down, love", Hana sighs and makes you sit up so she can look into your tear stained face as she tries her best to make sure her words actually find their way to your pain clouded mind, "at this point you shouldn't worry too much because you do know Kyoutani, don't you? He does lose his temper a lot, so give him the time he needs and then you'll show up at his doorstep, suck his cock and make up with him, yeah?", she explains calmly.

"If this hurts you so much, why the fuck did you even say he's just a friend, Y/N? I really don't understand", Hana mumbles and lets out another sigh, her hands caressing yours softly, managing to calm you down a little bit.

“You're right, I should just– give him some time and things will eventually fall into place", you reply after crying a little more and with an encouraging smile your best friend nods at you before she suggests a movie marathon to which you happily agree.

At least something to distract you from all the demons inside your head.

After changing into your pj's and doing your night time routine, you plop down onto the couch next to your bestie again, her eyes focused on the phone in her hand and knowing she's probably either sexting or inviting her new boyfriend has you shrugging at her lack of attention as you start looking for a good movie to begin the night with.

However, just when you're about to read the description of some kind of french rom-com, Hana puts her phone back into her lap and starts staring at you with her pretty eyes widened in shock.

"What's wrong?", you ask and turn to look at her, reaching for her hands but before you even get the chance to touch her, Hana unlocks her phone and holds it up for you to watch someone's instagram story.

The video begins with loud music, a crowd full of young college students whose faces definitely are familiar.

Everyone in the video is dancing, making out, smoking and just chatting in a random living room and every now and then there's someone yelling in the back – a typical college party.

However, just as the video is about to end, the camera shifts to a tall male leaning against the wall, obviously standing really close to the person who's filming and it takes you a full blown thirty seconds to realize who said male is.

Kyoutani Kentarou.

You stare at the phone for another minute, your throat dry and your head empty as a thick veil of tears slowly starts blurring your sight before you finally decide to pay attention to the username.

"He can't be fucking serious", you hiss, fisting the blanket beneath you, the urge to punch something or someone becoming unbearable, "what the fuck is he doing at a random college party with – Sora?"

"Y/N, don't–", "Whose party is that?", you interrupt your best friend, not giving a single fuck about her attempts to calm you down; not anymore. Hana gulps harshly and strictly avoids your gaze as she mumbles a name and you roll your eyes, asking her to speak up with an annoyed sigh.

"It's one of Yuuji’s frat parties", and as soon as your best friend says the name of your ex-boyfriend, a cold shiver of disgust runs down your spine and you can feel yourself getting lightheaded from all the emotions rushing through your overwhelmed body.

"Don't follow me if you're going to stop me from leaving, Hana", you say and stand up before quickly disappearing inside your room.

You have no idea how you manage to get dressed, your outfit consisting of a pair of jeans and a hoodie you can't even remember buying and you don't even wanna think about what your hair and face look like when you end up leaving the house with your keys and your phone.

After driving this route for over two years on an almost daily basis, it takes you less than ten minutes to arrive in front of the huge house your ex-boyfriend lives in.

The memories start finding their way back into your head way too fast, taking away your breath and numbing your whole body because even if you didn’t love Yuuji anymore, the bitter feeling of betrayal still manages to hit you in just the right way.

It takes you a lot of willpower to actually approach the house and eventually get in. And after being in between the crowds of drunk, stinky college students, you remember why you hate college parties so much.

"I – Wow”, a familiar voice manages to break through the loud music, your instant reaction just an annoyed eye roll, “you were the last person I expected to see at one of our frat parties", Yuuji says and comes to stand in front of you.

His blonde hair messily falling into his handsome face and from the way his whole face seems to be covered in the deepest shade of red – including his eyes – you know that he's probably higher than the stars and you can't help but sigh.

"I'm not here to party, Yuuji", you hiss, feeling the anger crawl up your spine again the longer you look at your ex, "my boyfriend is here and I have to talk to him."

"So you and that tattooed guy are actually a thing? Didn't think so since he, you know – showed up with another girl", Terushima mumbles and pulls out a cigarette from his pocket, a mischievous smile on his lips.

"Oh, shut the fuck up, Yuuji", you spit back and roll your eyes, taking in the way the pretty boy arches his brows up in pure shock at your rather new attitude, "go and get high or whatever you do to feel proud of yourself", are the last words you say to him before you walk away, your heart thrumming inside your throat.

Your eyes roam the huge crowd, desperately searching for the only face you wanna look at right now and you try to remember where they were standing in the video Sora had posted only to realize that you can't remember.

After all you only watched the video once, your whole attention laying on Kyoutani. And after almost fifteen minutes, you find yourself slowly giving up.

Maybe this was just not meant to happen or maybe Kyoutani has left already.

He probably left with Sora- something you can’t and won’t ever blame him for.

After all she's literally one of the prettiest and hottest girls you have ever seen – anyone who rejects her would be out of their mind (or not attracted to girls which isn't the case when it comes to Kyoutani).

You give it another ten minutes of desperately looking around before you let out a deep sigh which gets lost in the loudness and thick air of the party before you finally start making your way back to the front door.

You quickly walk back to your car, trying your best to ignore everyone around you, especially all the drunk guys who are currently about to get into a verbal fight over something totally random and the last thing you want to experience those threats becoming reality.

At some point you're scared they might even include you which is probably why you end up literally sprinting and even though you always park so far away from frat houses just because you've heard way too many stories of people getting their cars stolen during parties, but right now you just wished you would have listened to your gut feeling and parked in front of the fraternity like every normal person.

However, to your life long luck, you spot a tall figure standing a little too close to your vehicle just as you’re about to unlock it. You slow down your movements almost instantly upon seeing the stranger, yet your eyes still try to figure out if it's someone you know despite the darkness surrounding the two of you.

He has probably spotted you by now, after all you're still panting like crazy from speed walking down to where your car is and it takes you a full minute to realize how loud you're actually being.

"Y/N", the male suddenly says, his deep voice sending shivers down your spine and even though it could have been everyone, it sounds a tad bit too familiar to your ears which is probably why you end up approaching him slowly.

"It's me, Kyoutani", he adds and at the same moment the words leave his lips, you finally recognize his pretty features which seem extra beautiful underneath the bright moonlight.

And then realization hits you.

"How did you know–", "Hana called me and asked if I could make sure you got home even if I didn't want to talk to you. So, here I am. Get in the car so I can tell her I did my part of the job", he interrupts you quickly, obviously not having the intention to interact with you and the way his usually so tender-filled eyes and calming voice are nothing but ice-cold has a thick veil of tears blurring your sight.

Never ever did you think about the moment, where Kyoutani puts the cold mask on he loved to hide behind when he had first looked at you all those weeks ago.

And the longer he avoids your gaze, the heavier the burden on your chest becomes.

"I'm sorry, Tani", you whisper, your voice breaking at the end, easily giving away how much his cold demeanor has gotten to you.

“Of course you're not just a friend to me and I d-don't know why I introduced you like that, everything happened so quickly and I – panicked. It's not an excuse and does not justify my behavior but I just wanted you to know that you've always been more than just a friend to me", you continue, managing to keep talking upon realizing that Kyoutani won't interrupt you and the way he even listens to you with his eyes looking everywhere but yours is absolutely enough for you.

"What am I to you then, Y/N? Am I the guy you're casually fucking? Your booty call? Am I your second choice? Like what the fuck do you expect me to say? I know we never put a label to – this", he starts pointing at you and then himself, "but you knew I was serious about it, about you. So, I just don't understand why you would even think about considering me a friend. I told you that I am not one for that friends with benefits kinda shit and you agreed yet you did this and now I can't help but be convinced you just used me to get that Yuuji fucker.”

Kyoutani is angry and he doesn't even try to hide it as he spits out those words, the ones he’s probably been dying to say out loud for the past few days and you know he has every right to actually be mad at you, his words still hit you in a way you didn't expect them to.

"I'd never do that to you, Kentarou; I'd never use you like that, please believe me", you say quickly, a little surprised you're even able to form proper sentences.

“You m-mean so much to me and I just don't know how to put it into words. My heart hurt so much when I watched you type your number into Sora's phone but the demons in my head, they just kept talking over my heart and – I'm just really sorry, Kyou, I really am", you sigh and after realizing that he's not going to look at you, you finally manage to shift your gaze away from his pretty face.

"Go home, Y/N. It's been a long day for both of us and I think some more distance will help me get my mind straight", Kyoutani replies after a long, torturous beat of silence lingering in the cold air and even if it wasn’t the reply you had hoped to hear, you're glad he's at least not completely ending it.

"Okay b-but at least let me drive you home?", you ask softly, wiping away the few tears which had managed to escape and when you look up at the beautiful faced male in front of you, his eyes meet you for the first time since what feels like forever and you feel yourself melting away.

"I don't think that's a good idea, pretty girl", Kyoutani sighs, the soft pet name sending your mind into the sweetest haze of comfort just like that, "it's only been a few days but I am craving your touch and I just know I'm going to lose it and fuck you against the next best surface if we get into that car together, so I have to decline this offer", he adds and takes another step back, his lips stretching into a tiny smile and you can’t deny how much his words have you gotten you worked up, but you have no choice but to nod.

"Have a good night, baby", Kyoutani sighs and deep down you're hoping for a kiss, after all it's been way too long since you got to feel close to him but instead, he just lifts his hand up and starts waving at you and just as he is about to turn around, you find yourself reaching for his wrist. The fear and despair inside of you making you a little too brave for your personal liking but you know you can't just let him walk away like that.

"Please, Tani- Kyoutani", you whisper and let out a soft sigh of relief when he turns around to face you again, "I won't try anything, I just want to spend a little bit more time with you."

Kyoutani takes a deep breath, his dark eyes roaming your face and wandering down your body and even though it feels like he's literally devouring you alive, you enjoy his burning gazes regardless, a hidden part inside of you even craving them.

A solid minute passes by before he lets out a sigh and gives you a nod, his plump lips pressed into a thin line.

It takes you another deep breath and a couple of seconds to actually calm yourself down from the rollercoaster of emotions you've been through within the time span of an hour and as you sit there in your car, inhaling the cold air of the night, your mind starts replaying everything that went down, starting from the day you met Kyoutani, to your first and most recent kiss, as well as the encounter with Sora and your deep anger towards Yuuji.

The drive to Kyoutani's apartment passes by in a blur, way too fast for your liking and you can't help but pout when you pull up in front of the huge building, knowing very well that this will be the last interaction with the handsome tattoo artist for the upcoming few days and you can already feel tears pricking at the corners of your eyes.

He's been awfully quiet, not like you actually said anything but Kyoutani's silence was intense, boring into your soul and actually suffocating you to a point where the urge to just jump out of the car became overwhelming.

You know he's probably going through everything just like you, yet the feeling that his thoughts are more on the negative side just won't leave you alone and you hate the way your assumptions are being confirmed as soon as Kyoutani turns to look at you.

"I – love you, Y/N", he suddenly says, his voice soft and calm, yet still deep and the way it's filled with tenderness and the sweetest bit of longing makes the effect of those magical words even heavier.

Your lips part in shock, your head having a difficult time actually processing his confession and you can feel your whole body going into a standby mode.

"But you're not good for me."

You remember the way your heart broke into thousands of pieces when you found out the alleged love of your life was cheating on you without even batting an eye.

The pain was so intense and heavy, you didn't know how to deal with it and at some point you were convinced that your heart had stopped beating for a solid minute. It was bad, left you speechless and threw you into a hole of darkness you barely managed to escape from, yet still leaving you grateful for the experience.

You thought your first heartbreak would be able to prepare you for what's to come in the future, but what you went through as soon as those words had fallen past Kyoutani’s lips, can't be compared to anything you've ever felt before.

Your heart starts clenching as his words keep replaying inside of your head and your throat so is going absolutely dry from your desperate attempts to gasp for air as the feeling of being suffocated comes back.

Everything around you seems to disappear, your eyes still focused on Kyoutani's intense gaze as the feeling of emptiness starts filling up your whole body.

You easily lose track of time, your heart beat so slow and heavy and when the wave of reality crashes you yet again, an almost inaudible sob falls past your lips.

"B-But...", you can't get yourself to speak, the words getting stuck in your throat and soft cries the only thing filling the inside of your car.

And yet, there are so many things you want to tell him, so many things rushing through your mind at the highest speed, almost impossible to grasp them and actually put them into proper sentences.

"You have too much control over me. I lost myself trying to fit into the picture of a lover you need and deserve. But – I am not who I used to be anymore”, Kyoutani explains, nervously rubbing the sides of his pierced node with his thumb as he avoids looking in your direction at all costs.

“I am scared of losing what's obviously not mine. You make me feel weak and vulnerable and I just can't deal with it. You've become the center of my world, and I can't control how much it affects me. How much you affect me and – I hate it", he continued, his voice is still incredibly calm, yet a bittersweet tone of fear coating every single one of his words.

"B-But...", yet again, the whole of your vocabulary seems vanished, not one word to say as the knot in your throat tightens even further.

"I'm sorry, Y/N. I thought I could do it but – I am not meant to love and you deserve to be loved in the most special way possible”, he takes another quick break, letting out a sigh of exhaustion, “and that's why I'm letting you go. Please, don't hate me. Take care and – goodbye, my love.”

Those are his last words before he presses his lips against your forehead, making your head spin like crazy because of the contrast of his heartbreaking words and his soft kiss.

Kyoutani leaves without saying another word. He doesn't even look back once as he walks away and enters the apartment building, while you can't stop staring at the door with hot tears streaming down your cheeks and loud sobs filling the suffocating air surrounding you.

There you are, yet again.

Your eyes staring into the dark night as your body tries to cope with the intensity of pain you've thought you had overcome.

The constant breaking of your heart starts numbing every part of your body and you slowly start losing yourself in this certain kind of darkness.

Seconds turn into minutes and without even realizing, a whole hour has gone by with you staring into nothing.

Your mind plays games with you as it keeps replaying his words, his behavior, his kiss and the feeling of slowly but certainly going insane as you get out of the car a little too fast.

You tumble back, the sudden coldness hitting you right in the face and the mental as well as physical exhaustion has your body trembling.

And then it hits you.

The wave of anger, wrath, frustration and hatred literally wakes you up, pulls you back into reality and ends up taking over you completely.

Your eyes find the huge apartment building Kyoutani lives in, staring at it as if you could set it on fire and you know what you're about to do is a bad idea but your body acts before your mind can even get the chance to intervene.

And that's how you find yourself almost brutality slamming your fist against Kyoutani's door, your heart hammering against your rib cage way too fast for it to be still physically healthy and ten thousand different thoughts rushing through your chaotic mind.

"What the fuck is going – Y/N", Kyoutani looks at you with his pretty eyes slightly widened in shock, his lips parting as he struggles to keep his eyes on you and a disgusting feeling of shame and embarrassment starts filling you up.

You know this is pathetic, you are aware of how stupid you look standing in front of him like this but you just can't get yourself to actually care about it.

"Y/N, please don't-", "No, I listened to what you had to say and now I'm going to talk and you're going to listen to me. Before that I am not going anywhere because I deserve this", you cut him off, hands balled into fists as you try to stay calm but the more you think about his words in the car, the angrier you get.

"I–", Kyoutani sighs, his eyes nervously roaming your face and upon noticing the way you seem to shiver from the cold and your lack of clothing, he lets his conscience get the best of him, "alright, come in then.”

You follow him inside, the familiar scent of vanilla and Kyoutani's favorite febreeze scent filling your nose and you hate the way how comfortable you are.

After all you've been spending quite some time in this apartment; visiting him after your classes so he could bury his face between your legs and then offer you some homemade food, followed by a good old ghibli movie and lots of cuddles has become some kind of routine.

Oh, how you hate him for ruining all of those memories.

"Do you want something to drink? You're probably freezing", he offers, his voice filled with concern and you know he is right and you'd definitely give everything for a cup of tea and maybe some water, you still shove all of your body’s basic needs into the very back of your head and try to regain your composure.

"I – you – we", you take a deep breath, your mind struggling to put all of those racing thoughts into some kind of order, yet failing miserably.

But there's so much you want to say to him; so many things you want him to hear and now that you are actually standing in front of him, your body betrays you.

"You're a fucking coward, Kyoutani Kentarou", is the first thing you finally manage to let out, "and I hate you for leaving me like this. I fucking hate you.”

Deep down, you hate yourself for saying those words; the choice of words and the incredible heaviness they come with are usually not your way of expressing yourself yet you're not regretting them.

You don't know how this night is going to end, maybe this will be the last time you get to see Kyoutani or he'll eventually fuck you into oblivion and you finally end up together; but nevertheless you want your words to hurt him; you want them to wake him up just like his did to you.

"How dare you confess your love to me and tell me I basically ruined your life in the same breath when you're the one who's fucking all of this – us up. Yes, I’ve made a mistake and I've been regretting my choice of words for the past four days, even came to the point where I accepted your distance and decided to let go because I know how much my words hurt you. But us ending like this? Definitely not going to happen", Kyoutani stares at you with his pretty eyes focusing you attentively, barely blinking, not moving at all; he’s just listening to you.

"I just – don't understand how you can be this oblivious."

"Oblivious? Oblivious to what?", he asks, his voice a little deeper and raspier, sending goosebumps straight dow your spine as if your body needed to remind you the effect he has on you.

"Oblivious to everything. This is what love does to people, Kentarou. Of course you're going to feel weak and vulnerable because of me - because of the one you love. After all the point of being loved and loving someone else is showing those vulnerabilities and weakness to the person you trust the most because you know, or at least you hope, they won't take advantage of it.”

You take a deep breath, your mind slowing down as you ease yourself into his calming embrace and subconsciously losing yourself in the comfort it comes with.

“I'm yours. I've been yours since the very first day and we both know this, that's why you are so scared of losing me. And that's why my words hurt you so much”, you can tell that he’s already processing your words as much as he can; his habit of scratching the back of his head giving him away easily.

"You said you've lost yourself trying to fit into this picture of someone who I deserve but – you are the one who created that picture in the first place. Just because my first boyfriend was an alleged goody two shoes doesn't mean that you have to be like that too. Fuck that", you hiss, the thought of Kyoutani changing even the slightest bit about himself sending jolts of anger through your veins, "I don't care if you dropped out of college or that you have tattoos and piercings and bleach blonde hair. None of that matters to me because it's you, your kind heart and your pure soul I fell in love with.”

And suddenly - you can feel the burden on your shoulders disappear when those certain words leave your lips and the second Kyoutani raises his eyebrows in slight surprise before he locks eyes with you again has another breath of fresh air run through your suffocated lungs.

"Yes, I'm in love with you, Kyoutani Kentarou. Believe it or not, but for me, you're perfect just like this, with all your tiny habits and every single tattoo. There's nothing I'd change about you and I'm genuinely, truly sorry if I ever made you feel like you needed to change for me. You're a great guy and I guess that's why I ran back here after sitting in that car, crying for an hour because I couldn't stop thinking about the way you confessed your love to me”, you feel the thick veil of tears appear before they manage to block your sight, making the pretty face in front of you turn into bourry little pixels as your emotions overwhelm you.

“And yes, you are meant to be loved; maybe not meant to be loved by me but you deserve to be loved, do you hear me?"

You go up to him, closing some of the distance between the two of you before your finger darts out and poke his strong chest, trying to ease the tension after letting go of all those thoughts, "you deserve to love and to be loved because you're a good person. And I just – wanted to thank you for letting me into your life. Meeting you, getting to know the beautiful person you are has been one of the best things that has happened to me and I will cherish these memories forever."

And with those words you take a deep breath, let out another sigh, goving away your acceptance of defeat before you lift your head and prepare yourself to say your last goodbye no matter how painful it is.

"Take care, Kyoutani Kentarou and thank you, for everything", the words fall past your lips in the form of a whisper solely because you're too scared to break if you raised your volume just slightly.

You turn around and feel the first tear find its way down your cheek before you even get to walk away.

And just as you wrap your fingers around the doorknob, the sound of rushed footsteps approaching you makes you halt your movements.

"D-Don't go", Kyoutani suddenly says, his voice breaking when he comes to stand behind you, so close you can actually feel the warmth he's radiating, "I need you...so bad", he whispers into your ear, pressing his forehead against the back of your neck and it's like everything that happened tonight becomes irrelevant.

You turn around, not expecting Kyoutani to push you against the door with his whole body, yet still embracing him as much as you can.

With a soft sob, you start inhaling his unique scent, grazing his soft skin with your fingers and letting the warmth blossom inside of your chest after feeling his rapid heartbeat beneath your palm.

"Don't leave me, please", he cries, the tears running down his flushed cheeks despite his desperate attempts of holding back, "let's do this whole love thing.”

You stand there for what feels like an eternity, just hugging each other, taking in each other's presence and calming down from everything that has happened in such a short time. You finally calm down completely, Kyoutani's soft touches and tiny kisses give you the last bit of energy you needed and for the first time in almost three months, there's not one demon in your head trying to make you overthink something.

Because this feels perfect; there's literally no other word to describe the feeling of holding Kyoutani Kentarou and being held by him.

But nevertheless, you've been on a constant adrenaline rush for the past four hours and the exhaustion has been killing you, making you grow tired a lot faster than usual.

"What about moving this to your room, hm? I'd rather fall asleep with you in your bed than against the door; especially because I know the boys are out and will be coming home soon", you say softly, lifting Kyoutani's head from the crook of your neck and looking at him.

He sighs and gives you a soft kiss, giving you a nod in response before he gets himself to let go of you; his warmth leaving with him and it's almost disgusting how you literally crave his presence.

After Kyoutani makes you drink two glasses of water to avoid the dehydration of your body, he hands you one of his thick hoodies and leaves you to get ready in his bathroom.

You come back to the sight of him sitting against the headboard of his king sized bed, his oversized shirt revealing the perfect amount of collarbones and you enjoy the sight of his pretty skin and the dark lines covering most of it as well as the way his sweats hug his strong thighs in the best way possible.

And as you watch his eyes lazily roam your body, a hot jolt of arousal finds its way through your veins and right to your cunt.

"Don't look at me like that, sweet girl", Kyoutani suddenly groans and cocks his head to the side, his tongue poking out to wet his lips before he gulps harshly; his eyes never once leaving yours.

"B-But Tani...", you reply, approaching him with tiny steps become you come to stand right next to his tall figure, feeling yourself growing needier because of the way your body is craving his touch now more than ever.

“Baby…”, he replies and gulps harshly, knowing your body better than yourself after weeks of getting to know you in a way nobody has ever before.

"Please, Tani...please, fuck me. I need to feel you inside of me. I've been waiting for so long...", you plead, your fingers coming to graze his pretty lips as memories of all the times he had turned you into a crying mess with those lips.

Kyoutani is just as affected by the change in tension as you, the slight bulge in his grey sweatpants as well as the hunger burning in his eyes giving him away.

"You're such a pretty angel girl, aren’t you?", he whispers and sits up, pulling you closer to make you stand in between his legs as he starts caressing your hot cheeks with his fingers.

“Yet you're saying all those naughty things”, Kentarou chuckles deeply, “imagine how people would react if they knew what a cockhungry little slut you actually are", upon hearing those degrading names, your cunt starts clenching around nothing and a high pitched whimper escaped your throat.

"For you...", you whisper, pulling your bottom lip between your teeth the second Kyoutani starts placing open mouthed kisses on your neck.

Your fingers dig into his shoulders, pulling the material of his shirt a little too tightly.

"Of course, baby, you're mine after all and this sweet cunt", the sudden feeling of his palm pressing against the damped fabric of your panties has you gasping for air, "belongs to me, and me only", Kyoutani grunts, pulling the skin of your neck between his lips before he starts sucking gently as well as slowly moving his fingers against the lacey fabric between your legs.

"Yes, it's yours", you reply, after several weeks of being intimate with Kyoutani you've learned one thing and that's how much he loves hearing you say all those dirty and lewd things, "please fuck me."

"Patience, my love, patience. I am going to fuck you", Kentarou replies calmly and suddenly pushes you away, his hands disappearing from your body and when your lid flutter open because of the lack of touch, he shoots you one of his cocky smirks, "but let's not forget the whole friend situation, hm? What about you make it up to me before I fuck you like the little whore you are?"

His words have excitement rush through your blood, your head literally spinning just from the thought of finally getting to be on the giving end after weeks of him playing the selfless lover.

You nod eagerly, anticipation sparkling in your eyes as you watch him palm himself over his sweats before you get on your knees and wait for him to let go of his now fully erect cock.

However, the more seconds pass by like this, the more nervous you become because for some reason you suddenly remember that you've basically never sucked dick before.

Your head shoots up with slight panic written all over your face and of course Kyoutani notices your change in demeanor right away.

"What's wrong, angel?", he asks you and stops the movements of his hands.

"I don't know how to do it, Tani", you whisper, knowing there's no point in being shy about it, after all he happens to be the guy you've experienced your most firsts with.

"It's okay, baby, I'm going to help you”, Kyoutani replies and actually loses his composure for a second, “fuck baby, don't look at me like this when I'm literally about to fuck your throat", he hisses, throwing his head back as he grunts and his hips desperately bucking into the air.

Kyoutani takes another deep breath before he finally pushes his hand underneath the waistband of his sweats and with your eyes focused on his movements, you watch him pull out his hard length, a soft hiss falling past his plump lips when the coldness of the room grazes the slightly wet tip of his cock.

You gulp harshly, his impressive size in girth as well as length has your pussy throbbing like crazy, yet you can't help but wonder how the hell he's going to fit inside of you.

“Don't worry, baby, I know you're going to take all of my cock like the good girl you are", Kyoutani says after observing your facial expressions for some time.

"Give me your hand", he asks you softly, his voice still raspy and incredibly hoarse yet still soothing and you appreciate his attempts to calm himself down so you won't feel too nervous. With your heart slamming against your rib cage, you lift your hand up and are slightly overwhelmed at the sudden feeling of Kyoutani's warm spit pooling inside your palm. Without adding anything, he straightens himself and motions you to stroke his hard cock.

Not once do you stop looking at him as you wrap your fingers around the base of his impressive length and slowly start jerking him off.

Kyoutani cocks his head to the side, his bottom lip pulled in between his teeth and his eyes constantly fluttering close.

"Start with the tip, angel- just wrap your lips around it and start sucking, but be careful with your teeth, yeah baby?", he grunts, his hips thrusting into your fist every time the pace of your strokes slows down.

You give him yet another nod before look up at him one more time and do as he says.

The feeling of his cock between your lips is – different.

It feels like it's not supposed to be there, yet the salty taste of his precum coating your tongue has you sighing softly. Your tongue darts out, giving his tip a tiny kitten lick before you go back to sucking on it eagerly.

And while you seem to enjoy it a lot, Kyoutani is going absolutely crazy. You can see the way he's tensing his body as his grip in the bed sheets tightens and the vein on his neck pops out.

"F-Fuck, baby, just like that", he praises you "now try to take more of it in a-and use your hand for the rest", Kyoutani's voice is shaky, his eyes are nervously roaming your swollen lips and the string of spit connecting them to the tip of his cock.

Without giving it another thought, you take a deep breath and take more of him, trying your best to not graze his sensitive cock with your teeth and despite your initial struggle, you still enjoy the feeling of his cock on your tongue.

You subconsciously wrap your fingers around the part of his cock which you can't fit inside your mouth and suddenly it's like your body knows exactly what to do.

Kyoutani's moans grow louder and the soft thrusts of his hips become a little less controlled. You look up at him every now and then, trying your best to keep the steady rhythm as you bop your head.

And then he suddenly thrusts his length all the way to the back of your throat, your gag reflex just about to go off when he pulls back which is the moment you take notice of the tears streaming down your cheeks.

You give him a soft smile before going back to wrapping your lips around his tip, but you don't get very far.

Kyoutani pulls you back, his grip on the back of your neck not firm enough to hurt you.

"I promise I'm going to fuck your throat properly and even cum in your mouth the next time we do this but right now I just can't stop thinking about that tight cunt of yours", he says, helping you get up and almost instantly pulling you onto his lap; his wet cock rubbing against your panty covered core as Kyoutani pulls you in for a kiss.

It's sloppy and rushed, the way his tongue grazes over yours before he pulls it between his lips and starts sucking at it. Your hips start moving against his cock, your sensitive pussy craving some kind of friction as the arousal has your head spinning like crazy.

You start moaning and whimpering into his mouth when Kyoutani’s hips start meeting your desperate movements, applying the perfect amount of pressure onto your needy clit.

You feel the knot in the pit of your stomach tightening, the clenching of your cunt becoming worse the more you hump Kyoutani's cock like a woman starved.

But nothing prepares you for the feeling of one of his large digits entering you. Your hole start clenching around his finger Kyoutani pushes another one in, both digits buried inside of your little cunt.

"Such a good girl for me, aren't you, baby? I'm going to finger you nice and slow so you're ready for my cock. Now come on, my love; show me what a good whore you are and ride my fingers", Kyoutani encourages you, his hot breath fanning against the sensitive skin behind your ear and without missing a beat, your hips meet the skillful thrusts of his fingers.

Kyoutani continues to whisper naughty things into your ear, his other hand eventually wrapping around your throat as he makes sure you look into his eyes when you stumble over the edge.

Your high hits you hard and fast, the intensity knocking the breath out of your lungs and leaving you gasping for it; something you should be used to by now yet still can't believe is even possible.

He pushes you off of his lap softly, helps you get rid of his shirt as well as your ruined panties before he makes you lay down in the middle of his bed; eyes locking with yours when he also starts undressing.

"My pretty girl", Kyoutani sighs, his hand caressing the soft skin of your thighs, spanking you every now and then just because he's absolutely obsessed with the way your whole body tenses whenever his hand meets your skin.

“Look at me", he orders and almost instantly your head shoots up to meet his gaze, the sight of his naked body distracting you a lot more than you expected but after all this is the first time you get to see the rest of his tattoos; the ones you usually only get a tiny glimpse of depending on his outfit choice.

Kyoutani spreads your legs apart, his eyes never leaving yours even when he starts jerking off again and you can't hold back the soft whimpers and begs leaving your lips.

But also something about his flushed cheeks and swollen lips as well as his messy hair falling into his face has you incredibly turned on.

"We've never talked about this before but are you on the pill, baby?", he asks, pushing one of his thumbs into his mouth before he brings it down to your clit and starts rubbing soft circles into it, making you arch your back off of the mattress as you bury your face in the pillow to keep your noises down.

"N-No", you whisper, a deep sigh coming from Kyoutani and even though you know you shouldn’t do it, you stop him from bending over to the drawer of his nightstand, making him look at you in confusion.

“But I still want you to raw me, please...", you add and gulp harshly when his whole body seems to go into some kind of haze once the words leaveyour lips.

Kyoutani looks at you, his eyes darkening even more as he pulls his bottom lip between his teeth and lets out a loud moan of your name.

"I can't just raw you, baby", he presses through gritted teeth, his mask slowly falling apart the more you rub yourself against his cock, "you've never had sex without a condom and my pull out game is weak, even weaker when it comes to you because fuck – the thought of filling you up with my cum sounds so fucking good", Kyou groans when you scoot up a little, taking his length into your hand before you line him up with your entrance.

"B-But what if you get pregnant, sweet girl?", he sighs and tries to pull away, making you wrap your arms around his neck as you look into his pretty eyes.

"That will just show everyone around us how well you've fucked me", you whisper and elicit another deep moan from him, his whole body shaking slightly as he tries to hold himself back from just pounding into you.

"Such a cockhungry whore", he hisses and – finally – starts pushing his fat cock into your tiny cunt, the slight stretch making you both gasp for air.

“If that's what you want, then that’s what you get, you little slut. I'm going to fucking raw you and fill you up with all of my cum, make you my cumslut", Kyoutani grunts, pulling your bottom lip between his teeth before he harshly grabs your face and looks into your eyes as he buries more of himself inside of you.

"F-Fuck, you're big", you whimper, throwing your head back and trying your very best to stop clenching around his cock.

“We're almost there, baby- you got this, s-stop clenching", Kyoutani grunts against your parted lips. Without a warning, Kyoutani pushes the rest of his huge cock inside of you, bottoming out completely.

“F-Fuck...you’re so– tight”, Kentarou grunts, his fingers digging into the flesh of your hips as he buries his face in the crook of your neck, “it’s like you’ve never been fucked before.”

“S-So good...so fucking good, nngh-”, your little whimpers and whines are slurred, barely coherent as the feeling of being filled to the brim pushes you into a haze of pleasure.

You feel the pulsation of his cock against your spongy walls, his hands nervously roaming your body and groping one of your tits, as he obviously tries to calm himself down.

And then he finally starts moving.

A deep, guttural moan leaves the both of you when he pulls himself out of your tight hole, dragging his huge cock along the walls of your little cunt in the most delicious way possible before he almost brutally shoves himself back in again.

“Mhm, just like that, you little brat”, he grunts, sitting up on his knees as he pushes your legs further apart, his eyes focusing the way his fat cock stretches your hole just how he’s been imagining it all this time, “coming up to me and talking about having your little cunt rawed like some cumhungry little whore.”

You start nodding almost instantly at his words, your brain barely recognizing them, the only thing you can focus on being the way the tip of his cock grazes the entrance to your womb with every harsh, brutal thrust of his hips.

His thrusts find a steady rhythm, hard and so, so deep.

“Open your mouth”, Kyoutani grunts, a single drop of sweat finding its way down the center of his tattooed chest, the sight making you whimper and whine for him even louder as you part your lips as soon as you process his words.

“You know what? I’d rather have you say it”, he suddenly hisses, pulling his cock out of your spasming cunt before he presses your legs together and shoves himself back inside of you with one skilled thrust of his hips.

You have no idea at what point you start crying but by the time Kyoutani's moans and grunts start picking up their pace, you're a sobbing mess.

“S-Say wh-what?”, you sob, hiding your tear and spit stained face behind your hands, not daring to look up at him.

“I want you to ask for my spit and beg for my cum”, Kentarou’s voice grows raspier, the dominance seething through every single one of his words makes it so easy for you to fall even further into the hole of absolute submission, “and stop hiding yourself, angel girl..I wanna watch the way I’m fucking your brains out.”

A row of loud, high pitched whines and a combination of sobs and moans are the only thing you manage to respond with, your brain clouded with the feeling of his thick cock dragging along the spongy walls of your cunt.

And before you can even comprehend his next movement, you hear the loud sound of skin meeting skin followed by the delicious feeling of a sting sending jolts of pain through your body, something you’ve come to love after so many hours with the tattoo artist.

“I told you to ask and beg for it, angel girl..you’re making me wait”, Kentarou spits, never once halting the movements of his hips as he watches the way you start sobbing even more, your cunt spasming around his cock after his painful spank.

“Please...f-fuck, please spit in my mouth and my face and on my cunt- want it all”, you start brabbling, another row of incohrent begs following right afterwars as your hips sloppily meet his harsh thrusts, “I want you to stuff me full of your cum, too- please, Daddy, wanna be your little c-cumdumpster.”

“There you go..”, Kyoutani’s plump lips stretch into a big smile as his cock throbs at the sound of that one forbidden little word he’s come to love even more after hearing it from you only a handful of times.

He didn’t hesitate to tell you about how much it turns him on around two weeks after the two fo you had started dating and even though he never really expected you to use it, he was secretely hoping for you to overcome your shyness.

You had used it only twice before when the pleasure had gotten too much for your brain to handle and Kyoutani knew you’d stop holding yourself back as soon as you got a taste of his cock.

“What did you just call me, pretty girl?”, he cooes, giggling softly at the way you whimper and cry even harder, knowing oh so well what he wants to hear.

And for the first time you just can’t get yourself to argue with the little voice in the back of your head; the feeling of his cock stretching your tiny cunt making it so, so easy to just let go of all those doubts and worries.

“Please, Daddy”, you reply and look into his eyes, groping your own tits as you arch your back to feel him even deeper inside of you, “n-need your cum inside of me...please- want everyone to know who I belong to.”

You don’t really expect it, yet your pussy almost instantly start clenching around his cock when kyoutani harshly grabs your face, making you part your lips before he spits into your mouth.

The loud, lewd sound of it rings in your ears in the best way possible and acting like a literal aphrodisiac in combination with the delicious taste of his saliva coating the hot muscle of your tongue.

You hum softly before you swallow it all, a gentle sob escaing your lips before you look up at him again.

"Now go on, angel girl��, he growls, pushing his hand in between your legs to rub circles into your hardened clit, “I want you to cum for me. Be a good little dumpster for your Daddy and show me what only I can do to you.”

You can barely process his words, the lewdness just fueling the fire in the pit of your stomach as you lose yourself in the feeling of your upcoming high. But you still start nodding, cringing at the feeling your saliva dripping down your jawline.

And with one last thrust, you feel your high crashing down onto you with such heaviness, you're left absolutely breathless.

Your whole body is trembling as the waves of your orgasm hit you, a row of incoherent words leaving your lips before you stop trying and just start crying for your precious Daddy.

"That's my baby”, is the first thing your brain manages to process again, everything still a blurry mess and when you look at Kyou, you realize you’re still cumming.

Your cunt is almost painfully spasming around his big cock, your juices dripping down the sides of his length as he helps you ride out your orgasm.

“You’re such a good, good girl for Daddy, aren’t you? I'm so proud of you", Kyoutani praises you, his thrust a little sloppier than before and from the way he's digging his fingers into the skin of your waist, you can only assume that he's also quiet close, "you're also going to take all of Daddy’s cum, right, baby? We gotta make sure I fill you up nicely..."

You take a deep breath, your slightly overstimulated cunt sending shivers down your spine as your eyes focus on Kyoutani's parted lips.

"Please, Daddy...need you to fill me up with your cum", you encourage him and when you slowly push two of your fingers into his mouth, knowing how much he loves to suck on them no matter what situation you’re both in, you finally get to see his whole face crunch up in pleasure.

His body tenses up as his grip on your waist becomes firmer before he starts cumming inside of you with a deep, raspy moan; coating the walls in several shades of white with three thick spurts of his cum.

Kyoutani buries his face in the crook of your neck as he slowly calms down, loud breathing and rushed gasps for air the only thing to fill the inside of his empty room.

"I love you so much", he whispers and gives you a soft kiss, his cock still firmly buried inside of your sensitive cunt before he shoots you a soft smile; looking almost boyish with his glossy eyes and flushed cheeks.

"I love you, too, D-Daddy”, you whisper, gulping harshly as the words leave your lips, feeling yourself grow even smaller underneath his strong yet comforting gaze, “thank you for giving us a chance", you add and pull him into for another kiss.

"Kyoutani Kentarou, your favorite group of walking disappointments is back and better than ev - oh", Iwaizumi Hajime, Kyoutani's High School best friend, fellow tattoo aritst and roommate suddenly yells and almost brutally slams open the door, startling you to the last bone in your body.

Kyoutani is quick to cover you up with his body, his hand reaching for one of the blankets on the floor as he grunts in annoyance.

"I'm so sorry, I didn't know–", "What is it, Iwa-Chan? Is he jerking off again? Kyoutani Kentarou you little piece of shit, just go and fuck that–", just like Iwaizumi, Oikawa – who also happens to be his best friend, felow tattoo artist and roommate – comes to stand in the doorway, bumping into his best friend before he finally spots the two of you.

"You're naked", he points out, closing his eyes almost instantly after realizing what he has just come to witness and despite the disgusting feeling of wanting to disappear and never come back again, you can't help but giggle at their shocked and slightly disgusted faces.

Kyoutani takes a deep breath and pulls out of you, still making sure to hide you behind his body before he hands you the blanket and lets his eyes shift to the door, looking at his best friends in pure disbelief.

"Kawa stop fucking staring and – can you two please fuck off?", he yells, pulling the boys back to reality and the way both of them shift to look at you only to blush from their necks to their ears has you chuckling softly.

This type of situation is nothing you’re not used to – unfortunately.

"Uhm – of course! Oh, my fucking God! So sorry, Kyou", Iwaizumi stutters and wraps his fingers around the doorknob, avoiding your eyes as much as he can before he pushes Oikawa away and then closes the door with another row of apologies.

Kyoutani just looks at you apologetically as he shakes his head and face palms himself, making the both of you burst into loud laughter.

And after taking a shower together and actually eating some late dinner with the boys, you fall asleep with Kyoutani's arms tightly wrapped around your waist, his face buried inside the crook of your neck and one last love confession.

And when those sweet words fall past his lips yet again, you realize – you're finally home.

[ banner source ]

[x-childish-x]

BYE IM SJCN A KURT PETER READER POLY RELATIONSHIP SIMP !! HI-

Can I request again? If not, u can ignore this but poly kurtpeter x reader headcanons g/n reader !

With a reader who always has a smile on her face ? But then one day, they come back to kurt and Peter's dorm and they completely crumble in their boys' arms whimpering about how lonely they were before they met kurt and peter, and before passing out, they tell the boys " I'll become a better person. Just for you two."

Then they wake up and just hold peter and Kurt's hand ( one hand for peter and one for kurt bc we're fair like that !!) And say " I meant what I said. I'd crown your heads with the stars I plucked from the sky. " In the most serious yet loving way possible

I'm such a hopeless romantic ngl

Breaking Down Headcannons

Pairing: Kurt Wagner x gn!reader x Peter Maximoff

Fandom: X-Men

Warnings: poly relationship, gender neutral reader, crying, sadness

Word Count: 505

A/N: Hello again love! Yes ofc, you're welcome to request as many times as you want. Sorry it took me so long to do this! Thank you so much for this request, I hope you enjoy and that it's what you wanted. Feedback is always welcome and encouraged! Liebe translates to love in German (I believe).

Summary: Headcannons about you breaking down in front of the boys due to a fear of loneliness.

(gif not mine!)

Always smiling was your default. It was how you always were.

And it wasn't necessarily because you felt the need to look happy but because you liked seeing how others got happy seeing you smile at them.

Your constant smile was something Kurt and Peter loved immensely about you, your kind smile being spread amongst humans and mutants both, lighting up every room you walked into.

That's why they were so incredibly shocked and confused when you came to their room, tears streaming down your cheeks and soft whimpers leaving your mouth.

Kurt would immediately panic, "Love, what's wrong? What happened? How can we help?"

Peter would be overly concerned about protecting you, "Who did this? Who do I need to kill? What happened. Tallk to us, honey. We need to make sure they pay."

You simply crumble.

"I just love you boys so much. I just... I'm so lucky. I was so lonely before I met you guys. I hated being lonely. Thank you for not making me lonely again."

The boys would immediately melt, Kurt teleporting you to bed while Peter sped over to join as you continued mumbling.

They each got on one side of you, cuddling you and trying to calm you down. It was nearly impossible, though. You were so worked up and hell-bent on making the boys understand just how much they meant to you that you were quickly tiring yourself out.

Your eyes eventually drifted shut as you rambled on. The boys decided it was best to let you get it out. They could question you later about what had evoked those emotions to come out.

"I promise," You whispered, "I'll become a better person. Just for you two."

After your sixth hour of being asleep, Peter mentioned that maybe it was literal exhaustion that had caused you to be so emotional.

You'd awoken not too much later, eyes fluttering and focusing on Peter in front of you, making you quickly turn to make sure Kurt was behind you, making you smile.

Silently and wordlessly, you held onto one of Peter's hands and one of Kurt's hands in each of your own, smiling at the feeling of your boys.

"I'm so for scaring you. I just got overwhelmed with that fear of being alone again."

"We're always here for you, Liebe. Never worry about being alone," Kurt responded softly, kissing your temple.

Peter smiled and nodded, "Always."

You cleared your throat and took a deep breath. You loved these boys more than you would ever be able to describe, and you just hoped that one day you would be able to repay them for everything they'd done for you. Slowly and softly, making sure that you said each word seriously and full of love, you spoke to your boys, "I meant what I said. I'd crown your heads with the stars I plucked from the sky if I could. I love you both so much."

Let's just say many happy tears were shed amongst the three of you.

General Taglist: @nowthisisdark @dwarfplanet69

[skiller0dani]

Bad Girl| Ethan Nestor

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smut requested requests info

hey guys it's been a while! Got this amazing request recently and I had to write it asap. love you all xx

Ethan didn't have many rules for you, but the most important one by far was to not bother him while he's streaming.

With the two of you keeping your relationship a secret there's just too much that can go wrong. He's live so if you came into the room, people could hear, rumors could start. More than anything Ethan wants to protect you so you coming into his recording room while he's streaming is completely out of the question. Normally you respected this rule without question, it was his YouTube channel after all, so he got to call the shots. More than that however, Ethan called the shots in other aspects of your life.

When it came to the sex, he called the shots in that too. But you always did what he said, and frankly, you felt like being a bad girl.

All day you've needed him, from the very second you woke up and the gentle morning sex he'd provided wasn't nearly enough to satiate you. You still felt that uncomfortable throbbing from between your thighs, and it lingered for most of the day. Any attempt you made to get his cock resulted in a soft kiss on the head and a "sorry baby I'm too busy today."

You laid back on the couch, irked to all hell. How could Ethan not see that he was depriving you? You pushed the heel of your hands into your eyes and groaned, your pussy was damp and aching and there wasn't a damn thing you could do about it. Spencer sat happily at your feet chewing on a squeaky bone. At least one of you was happy.

You heard Ethan laugh from inside his recording room, he was currently streaming Among Us. You feel so frustrated you want to cry and when you glance at the clock you feel like crying all over again. It's only 1:30, and Ethan is only 20 minutes into his stream. Meaning at this rate Ethan won't be able to help you until later tonight. You whined to yourself, snaking your hand under the sleep shorts you were wearing. Your fingers found your clit and you began to rub small circles just like Ethan does. It does little to nothing to relieve the pounding in your core. Only Ethan can.

You stand from your spot on the couch to go grab a bottle of water, hoping that some cold water will help calm you down. You lean against the counter, sipping at the cold water when you remember the night before. Ethan had come home from filming with someone he doesn't know very well. The recording session was frustrating and he hadn't gotten any good footage, meaning the entire day was a giant waste of time. By the time Ethan had gotten back to the house he was beyond frustrated and the first thing he did was bend you over the kitchen counter and slam into you mercilessly. You feel a shudder run down your spine at the memory and you groan softly in annoyance. You're not going to survive the day like this.

You went upstairs and into your shared room with Ethan and sat on the edge of the bed, you're always such a good girl. You followed every rule and every command without too much complaint. And today Ethan told you to wait. His rule today was to be a good girl and wait for his cock until that night. But damnit you're so turned on right now you feel like you're going to combust into flames.

You don't want to be a good girl today. You feel like breaking the rules.

With a smirk you stand from the bed and creep down the hallway, nearing his recording room. Once you're stood outside the door you feel a rush of adrenaline rush through you, you've never broken this rule before. In all 12 months of your relationship with Ethan, you've never interrupted him while he's live streaming. You almost turn back but when you hear Ethan groan in annoyance it sends tingles down your spine and a fresh wave of arousal dampening your panties. Gritting your teeth you quietly open the door and watch as Ethan's surprised eyes flicker to you for a second.

You bite your lip and sink to the floor, luckily Ethan's desk doesn't have a back so you easily crawl underneath it.

Being careful not to bump the desk you slowly crawl in between Ethan's legs, and he instinctively spreads his legs wider for you. When he glances back down at you, you feel heat rush through your entire body at the angry look in his eyes. He raises a warning brow before turning back to the game and for a second you consider leaving, but the pulsing from between your legs stops you. You bite your lip and reach forward, carefully unbuttoning Ethan’s jeans and slowly pulling his zipper down. 

Ethan tenses, his heart hammering in his chest as he does his best to act natural. This isn’t a regular video, he can’t edit anything out. This is being broadcasted live to nearly a million people. When he feels your dainty hands reaching into his jeans he sucks in a breath through his teeth. 

“Ethan you okay?” Bob asks, unfortunately for Ethan they decided to play Among Us with proximity chat on. Ethan clears his throat, “yeah stubbed my toe.” He lies but he knows it doesn’t sound very convincing. 

You wrap your hand around his hardening cock and you nearly moan when you finally free it from his jeans. The sight of it makes you even more wet then you were before, it’s hard and precumming. It’s beautiful. You lean forward instantly and wrap your lips around the head, sucking softly. Ethan clenches his jaw as he focuses all of his attention on the game in front of him. He keeps his eyes firmly on the screen because he knows if he looks at you it’s game over. Ethan would end the stream and have you bent over this desk in less than 30 seconds if he saw the beautiful sight happening under the desk. 

You keep your lips wrapped around him as you suddenly take all of him in your mouth. Ethan gasps softly in surprise, and this is when he notices the comments on his stream. 

Ethan flashes a smile to the camera, doing his best to pretend he doesn’t notice that every single comment is about him and not about the game. Embarrassment floods through Ethan’s body as he keeps his eyes on his monitor. You continue to slide him down your throat, and Ethan’s eyes briefly flutter shut. When one comment pops up, Ethan panics. 

what’s wrong Ethan???  he looks like he’s in pain  someone should tell the other people on the stream bc ethan does not look okay right now ethan are you okay? 

Shit. Ethan continues to ignore the comments, when did his fan base become little detectives? You bob your head down the full length of his cock, taking him into your mouth fully. It’s becoming increasingly harder to keep the sounds quiet so that nobody notices. When you swallow around him Ethan groans softly, “fuck.” 

does eef have a girl over?? ;)  omg ethan’s totally getting sucked off rn ngl ethan looks super fucking hot 

“Ethan?” This time it’s Mark. You pull off Ethan and smirk as you pump his cock with your hand. The arousal is coating your thighs at this point and you nearly moan out loud just thinking about what Ethan is going to do to you after this. 

“Ethan I’m getting some pretty interesting comments on my stream about you,” Jack says with a teasing tone to his voice. Ethan remains quiet, he doesn’t trust himself to say anything casually. “Got some company Ethan?” Jack says causing a chorus of laughter to ensue afterwards while everyone waits for another round to start. “His silence is...suspicious.” Steven adds through the laughter. 

Unable to focus any longer, Ethan releases a breath he’d been holding as he finally glances down at you. The sight before him stops him cold, you’re sitting on your knees with his cock in your mouth. Your breasts are spilling from the tight tank top you’re wearing and he can see the damp spot forming on the crotch of your shorts. His pupils blow wide as he quickly ends the stream and turns off the camera. The second he’s sure everything is shut off he pushes back from the desk and yanks you to your feet. 

“You think that was funny?” Ethan growls when he sees the smirk on your face. In an instant Ethan has you pulled over his lap, “you think it was funny to suck my cock when I was live? I can’t cover any of that up baby.” Ethan says, his voice low as his hands find the waistband of your shorts. 

“I need you.” You whined as he yanked your shorts down. Ethan hummed in satisfaction once he sees your glistening pussy. “Yes I can see that.” He hums, spreading your lips apart so he can look at you better. 

“I just fucked you this morning baby girl, you couldn’t wait? I’m pretty sure I told you to wait until tonight.” He says, the dominance beginning to seep into his tone. You moaned in delight when you feel Ethan spank you hard. “I couldn’t wait Ethan, I needed you now.” You explain, with a pout on your face. 

“Now all my friends know what a dirty girl you are, and now so do all my fans as well. We aren’t going to be a secret anymore baby, you just outed us.” Ethan explains, his fingertips brushing through your folds. You whine desperately as you try to grind back into his hand, but he pulls away. “It was time baby, oh my god Ethan please just fuck me please.” You plead shamelessly. 

Ethan continues to rub the globes of your ass as you moan and wriggle in his lap, “hm I’m not sure you deserve it now baby. You didn’t listen to me, I’m not sure you deserve my cock anymore.” He says, a small smirk on his face when he sees the look of pure desperation cross onto your face. “No Ethan please, I’ll listen now. I-I will I promise baby!” Ethan taps on your hip, signaling you to stand. Once your stood in front of him you moan again, you’ve never seen him look sexier then he does right now. 

His hair is messy and his chest his heaving, but the best part is between his legs. His cock is hard and his legs are spread wide, and the heated look Ethan is giving you makes you want to melt into the floor. “Go wait for me in our room.” Is all Ethan says, and you immediately scramble out of the room and down to hall to yours and Ethan’s bedroom. You sit on the bed and anxiously wait for him, your entire body buzzing in anticipation. When 10 agonizing minutes pass Ethan finally opens the door, his jeans still opened. “I’ve thought of a fitting punishment for you Princess.” 

Ethan walks to his side of the bed before sitting down, pulling you to stand in front of him. “Since you don’t seem to like my rules, why don’t you be in charge then baby?” Your heart sinks, and you immediately shake your head. 

“But I love it when you’re in control, I love following your rules.” You argue but Ethan shakes his head with a teasing smile on his face. 

“I seem to have lost my authority, you don’t listen to me anymore baby. So you try being in charge, tell me what to do.” Ethan reaches forward and yanks you towards him. You fall against his chest, your lips a hairs length from him, “boss me around.” He whispers and you swallow a thick lump in your throat. You stand again, feeling anxious and unsure of what to do. Normally Ethan tells you what to do, but he just relinquished all control to you and you already hate it. 

Ethan watches with knowing eyes, he knows already that you have no idea what to do. “Well? What do you want me to do baby?” Ethan asks, watching the blush crawl up your neck and tint the edges of your ears. You tremble, “um...I-” you feel your throat close as tears well in your eyes. In a second Ethan is pulling you into his arms, smoothing your hair down and pressing kisses to your head. You melt into his embrace while he mumbles loving words into your hair. “I’m sorry baby I didn’t mean to upset you.” Ethan whispers, pressing soft kisses to your head. 

“Is that how you felt on the stream? Embarrassed?” You ask hesitantly and to your dismay, Ethan nods. 

“Kinda, but it’s okay baby.” You lean up to press a kiss to his lips. 

“I’ve learned my lesson, I promise. I know why you make those rules now.” You say softly and Ethan brushes hair out of your face with a small smile. “Can you be in charge again?” Instead of answering Ethan flashes you a smile before pressing a kiss to your forehead. 

“Lay down baby.” In an instant the heat floods through your body again as you scramble to lay down on the bed. Ethan stands and swiftly yanks his shirt over his head, and motions for you to do the same. Sitting up you quickly pull your shirt off, watching as Ethan kicks his jeans and boxers off as well. Ethan hovers over you, and you feel his cock nudging at your entrance and in an instant you spread your legs wider for him. Ethan slides just the head of his cock into you and he stills. You wriggle your hips, “Ethan please,” You beg in a gasp. 

Cupping your cheeks, Ethan turns your head to look him in the eyes. “No more bothering me while I’m live got it?” He says and you nod instantaneously. With one sharp thrust, Ethan slides the rest of the way in and both of you release a moan. Pressing his lips to yours he begins to thrust into you and you feel the heat building already. You wrap your legs around him, locking your ankles behind his back as he slowly picks up speed. Ethan pulls out, “bend over.” He gasps and you move to bend over the bed, already missing the stretch his cock provided. As soon as you’re bent over in front of him, Ethan grasps your hips and thrusts back into you. 

Your face is pressed into the bed as you cry out softly, Ethan slamming into you again and again. “Fucking took my dick in your mouth in front of the entire world, you’re lucky they only saw me. If anyone else saw how beautiful you look with a cock in your mouth I think I’d lose my mind.” Ethan growls and you can only moan in response as your fists twist the sheets in your hands. You feel the coil in your abdomen winding tighter and tighter and when Ethan reaches around your body to softly pinch your clit you’re crying out and convulsing around him, leading him to his orgasm as well. You collapse against the bed and Ethan rubs a hand up and down your back before gently pulling out with a wince. 

He helps you into bed and lays down next to you, pulling your bare body against his chest. “I’m sorry I embarrassed you.” You say softly, but Ethan merely presses a kiss to your lips. 

“Only a little, I couldn’t be bothered too much I mean you were sucking my dick. Doesn’t get better than that.” Ethan shrugs, causing you to blush. You sit up when Ethan stands from the bed, reaching around for his clothes. 

“Now if your unusually high sex drive has been fully satisfied, I have some explaining to do.” Ethan teases, causing you to giggle. With a kiss to your sweaty forehead Ethan is exiting the room, and you lay back against the bed with the widest smile stretched across your face. 

[heyitsyn]

Prince Iwa-Chan

Oikawa!Sister x Iwaizumi Hajime

a/n: it aggravates me that my mans bara-arms-iwa-chan is so UNDERRATED!!!!

requests open!!

like look mom, im in love

ofc youre an oikawa

tbh, i dont think iwa wouldve been comfortable w you when yall first met

lets say youre a year younger than tooru

its a well-known fact that theyve been friends since they were really young so you, being oiks’ baby sister, was also part of your little trio

like lets say they met when they were 6

that would make you about 5

since yall have an older sister, you were exposed to the girly girl stuff like dolls and princesses

ngl, tooru was too thats why hes so flamboyant

but seems his fashion style refutes that

ya didnt hear that from me

anyways

tooru had already developed a deep fascination w volleyball bc he saw it being played during the 2000 summer olympics

but you remained w your sister and continued letting her treat you like a princess

im not really sure how old his sister is but lets say she was about around middle school when you were 5-6

however, tooru still made you play w him even though you didnt know how but you didnt care bc you were close w your brother so you would play ball w him

then came along iwaizumi hajime that tooru met from school

he found out that this boy also liked volleyball and tooru yeeted them both home so they could go and play at the back yard

you peeked from your window and you just thought iwa was the most handsome boy youve ever met

ofc, you just bolted down the stairs to where your brother and his friend was

oiks saw you standing by the door w a red face and him, being still a child and not understanding crushes, thought you were sick

he went to you and beckoned hajime to follow him inside

tooru sat you down and asked if you were okay but you just kept staring at hajime

he figured that you were just confused as to who this person was

‘oh! iwa-chan! this is my little sister, y/n! y/n, this is my classmate, iwaizumi hajime!’

cue iwa hitting him at the head

‘i can introduce myself perfectly fine, bakakawa!’

iwaizumi hajime,,,

iwaizumi hajimeee,

iwaizumi y/n

that thought made you turn even redder and you squealed in embarrassment before running back to your room

lmao what

if your personality doesnt align w this, i deeply apologize

i just think if you were an oikawa, you would bound to immediately also be drawn to this handsome specimen named iwaizumi hajime

he be getting the oikawas though

iwa was actually concerned but oiks waved it off

‘don’t worry, iwa-chan. shes weird like that. lets go toss the ball!’

so that was kinda how he met you

now, since hajime basically lived in your house by how much him and your brother hung out, youve slowly mellowed out and gotten to be friends w him

despite your hatred w bugs, you still went w them to explore just bc you wanted to be around hajime

lmao tooru youre now irrelevant

hajime didnt mind and he always made sure you were okay with the adventures of the day

even though you were only like a year younger, he cant help but baby you bc of your much smaller height than him and overall cute baby face

one day, they both came home from school all sweaty bc they raced home

‘iwa-chan! you can settle in the living room while i go shower!’

‘don’t call me iwa-chan, bakakawa!’

��then stop calling me that!’

he sat down on the couch and started doing his homework when he heard you come home from school

lmao how do little japanese kids go back and forth from school to home at the age of 6

idek how to cross the street

‘tadaima’

‘oh, okaeri, y/n’

you perked up at his voice and you ran to the living room, seeing him

‘iwa-chan!’

he grunted and you threw yourself to him in a hug

if your personality doesnt align w this, i deeply apologize

i just think if you were an oikawa, you would bound to immediately also be drawn to this handsome specimen named iwaizumi hajime

part 2

tbh it doesnt even faze him anymore since you do this to him every time

he continues doing homework and just wraps one arm around you and starts patting your head

‘tooru-nii?’

‘shower’

‘okay’

then silence

but its the good kind of silence

you and iwa just sit there with you snuggled up on him while he continues to add numbers

then it was ruined

by the pterodactyl oikawa tooru who comes flying down the stairs and glomps on to iwa’s other side

‘y/n-chan! stop hogging iwa-chan!’

‘he’s mine, tooru-nii!!’

you pout while iwa turns and gives him a glare

‘shut up, bakakawa! and stop calling me that!’

‘aahh!! you were mine first, iwa-chan!’

‘i was never yours! be quiet!’

‘itai, iwa-chan!’

‘he’s mine forever! we’re going to get married so butt out, nii-chan!’

‘HAH?!’

once everything calms down, yall actually start your homework and work

‘anything happen today, y/n-chan?’

oikawa always asked that question bc he believes its his duty as older brother to be caught up in your life

thats actually annoying bruv

‘hmm, me and the girls in my class were playing princess tea party today and a boy asked to be my prince.’

‘WHAT!’

oikawa is 7 now and he faintly has an idea about crushes and his father made him promise that he would protect you from nasty boys

‘calm down, bakakawa’

iwa mumbled, continuing his homework but also paying attention

‘WHAT!? NO! WHATD YOU SAY, Y/N-CHAN! YOUR BROTHER IS THE ONLY PRINCE YOU NEED!’

‘i told him i already have a prince’

oikawa was so smug and crossed his arms

‘hm, serves them right-’

‘prince iwa-chan and i are going to get married and live in a castle so there’s no room for anybody else’

iwa had to double check and turned red really fast

like who was this iwa-chan

wait, what his name?

his name has iwa in it

is he iwa-chan?

y/n’s prince iwa-chan?

was he really iwa-chan?

‘NO! YOUR NII-SAN IS YOUR PRINCE! IWA-CHAN CAN BE YOUR KNIGHT OR SOMETHING! BUT IM YOUR PRINCE!’

you glared at tooru and shook your head

‘no. iwa-chan is my prince’

you were so shamless about this fact

lmao i want your confidence

from then on, youve called iwa as your prince

like his name on your phone is literally prince iwa-chan

then when you were in middle school, you’ve started calling iwa as haji-senpai

there wasnt even a large event that spawned this

well,,, actually,,

youve noticed that iwa hated the nickname ‘iwa-chan’ a lot and he hit tooru many times bc of it so you stopped calling him that bc you didnt want him to be mad at you

so you started calling him senpai bc he was technically an upperclassman

when you first called him this, iwa was lowkey shook

‘haji,,,, senpai?’

you nodded from your spot on the couch, not looking up from your homework

‘see? i can only call iwa-chan, iwa-chan! OOF!’

that was iwa hitting tooru at the face with his pencil case

‘y/n, you dont have to call me that. we’ve known each other since we were little so you dont have to call me by an upperclassman term’

you shrugged

‘i know. but you dont like it when you’re called iwa-chan, do you?’

‘not if it’s by this trash’

he jutted a thumb to the fallen tooru

‘so,,,, iwa-chan is fine?’

your eyes sparkled at the permission of being able to freely call him that without worry

he gulps at your face and turns away to hide his red face before nodding

‘my prince iwa-chan!’

‘no! my iwa-chan!’

‘shut up shittykawa!’

‘itai, iwa-chan!’

keeping up with the oikawas

this nickname will forever be stuck

since you went to the same middle school, you were known to be around your brother and iwa and even staying behind for practice to walk home w them

it became a bit of a joke to the team of you picking up your prince

one day, a teammate called iwa, ‘prince iwa-chan’ and he almost busted a fuse

was ready to square up bc only his babie can call him that

but when you came through the door

‘prince iwa-chan! your princess is here!’

he turned all soft and squishy and pats your head so gently that they couldnt believe this is the same boy who is the ace

you were interested in volleyball so you were kinda friends w the team but you didnt really care for the sport, mainly focusing on your academics

thats how it really was for you three

they focused on sports while you studied

oh my here comes highschool

oikawa and iwa were already known throughout the FREAKING PREFECTURE bc of how TALENTED THEY ARE AT VOLLEYBALL

and you were already known by your pretty face and your cute personality

basically genderbent oikawa

and just wanted to stop you from reading by telling you that you are beautiful and you are a KWEEN and you are a GODDESS and confidence is the most beautiful thing to wear and best of all, it’s free!!

ofc, youd have to go to aoba johsai bc your brother was there

‘y/n-chan! you need to go where your brother is! you love him, don’t you?’

‘sure, tooru’

you actually went to seijoh bc you would see iwa 

you didnt hear that from me

your first day, boys (and gals) were already flocking towards you when they saw you walking with iwa and tooru

still being the overprotective brother since day1, oikawa was just snarling at anyone getting close to his baby sister

lmao what baby

hes only like a year older

but iwa was being terrirorial protective bc he finds it as an obligation as tooru’s best friend and your childhood friend

when oiks wasn’t paying attention and being drowned by his fangirls, iwa was your bodyguard

there was this one boy who started walking towards you as yall were going to your class but hajime placed an arm around your waist and pulled you closer

‘oh? i’m only at the first floor, iwa-chan. don’t get all clingy now’

lmao, girl hes trying to show that boy that hes your unofficial mans and will cut off his family jewels if he tries to even BREATHE in your direction

umm,,, iwa’s not yandere in this one yall

iwa just rolls his eyes and makes you walk forward until yall are at your door

‘i’ll see you later, iwa-chan!’

‘yea yea. i’ll pick you up’

he starts to walk down the hallway but you poke your head back out and shout

‘i miss you already, prince iwa-chan!’

he turns red all over and freezes for a 0.0002 seconds before raising a hand without turning around

now ladies and genitals

this is when iwa-chan starts to catch feelings like he catches them spikes

your cute smling face and saying his dumb nickname that he actually loves was like a recipe for a stroke for him

it has come to the point at the mere thought of you would make him all flustered and red

it tripled over when this happened:

puberty was kinda late for you and you actually just woke up looking like a goddess one day and you were like, lmao what

your chest just ballooned up and your height just skyrocketed that your skirt was now very short

ew i dont know what i would do in this situation

you were self-conscious about this and was kinda scared 

obvs, you would scream for your mother and she and your father and brother bolts up to your bedroom thinking there was a whole michael meyers in your room

but when you explained that your uniform doesnt fit anymore, she starts making appointments to get you fitted for another one

but you had to wait for a few days

so you went to school looking like a whole snacc

more of a snacc than you did before

when iwa saw you, he had a literal nosebleed in the middle of campus and runs to the bathroom to get all cleaned up

why in the name of asahi do you look like that?!

when you saw your prince look at you in horror and run away, you cried

you were already very self-conscious and him doing that just topped the cake

cake that tooru doesnt have

oop imsorry

tooru reassures you that he had a nosebleed and he was just sick and ran to not get any blood on his clothes

but you just walked away with your head down low

it didnt matter to you if this caught all the student body’s attention

that their precious oikawa y/n, little sister of the oikawa tooru, was a walking perfection goddess Venus

all that you cared about was iwa’s opinions bc he was your prince and your best friend

girl, accept that you actually like the mans

this was the worst day of your entire life and you went straight to your locker to get your gym clothes out and wear it for the day

it was tight but at least it covered skin

and it still attracted enough attention to be catcalled and whistled at

it felt violating

the entire morning, there was more attention and more people flocked over to you and guys were staring at you as if you were a piece of meat, not a girl

‘harry potter is a boy! not a piece of meat!’

sorry i cant help it

you were so uncomfortable that you called your brother during lunch time to come pick you up for lunch bc you were too scared to walk alone after being catcalled during your walk to your class

tooru sends out iwa to go help you as an apology from this morning and he just runs to your class bc you were in trouble and he was going to protect you!!

go iwa-chan!

he finds you sitting on your chair, looking down at your desk as there seemed to be boys piled up on top of each other, trying to get your attention

first world problems, amirite

‘OI!’

that angry grunt but at 2x bass boosted

hearing his voice, you were still embarrassed from earlier but you were so relieved

‘iwa-chan!’

iwa pushes people away and he grabs your hand to pull you up before wrapping an arm around your waist, protectively

‘if i see you idiots making her uncomfortable or even trying to touch her, i will destroy you’

protection and the feeling of safety is my fave

he leads you out of there to the stairway where him and his teammates were eating

he held your hand tightly and you squeezed it, trying to show that you were grateful

even if they were still male, your brother was there and if something happened, they were both strong enough to take them on

besides, its just mattsun and maki anyways

tooru saw you and he hugged you before leading you to the 2 others

‘guys, this is y/n, my sister. that’s mattsun and that’s makki.’

you slightly smiled and raised a hand in greeting

‘yo’

‘hello’

to be safe, iwa made you sit a step down from him so that if something happens, he could protect you

idk how but you do you boo

‘i can protect her too, iwa-chan!’

‘shut up, shittykawa. youre literally sticks and bones’

‘so mean! iwa-chan, you’re so mean!’

you giggled, head leaning down to rest on iwa’s right thigh since you were full and tired and he runs his hand through your hair

mattsun and makki shared a look before asking

‘are you dating our ace, y/n-chan?’

at the mention of dating, you both turned red and you sat up

‘OF COURSE NOT, MATTSUN, MAKKI!’

iwa shouts but his red face and ears betrayed him

‘iwa-chan grew up with us so he’s naturally like that. we’ve adopted him into our family!’

oikawa explained but you looked at him and he gave you a knowing look

oh he noticed everything

the lingering looks during practice

the bashful smiles during hang outs at home

unnecessary touches during the walk to school

oikawa may be annoying but he’s observant and he is smart

after that fiasco, the two boys were a little wary of letting you walk home alone so iwa offered to take you since he was already making more progress and didnt need extra practice while tooru wanted to practice more

‘iwa-chan, can we go to your house this time?’

he turned to look at you curiously since you never ask to go to his place

‘i miss your mom and ive been meaning to go visit her. so can we, iwa-chan?’

you squeezed his hand and showcased your pleading look making him agree

‘fine’

his house wasn’t a frequently hung out spot since your house was closer but you were still familiar with his home since his mother was fond of you

‘tadaima’

mama iwaizumi peaked from the kitchen and greeted him home before squealing at the sight of the youngest oikawa

‘oh my, y/n-chan! hello!’

‘hello, auntie!’ 

she gave you a big hug and you returned it with a laugh

iwa just standing there to the side with a smile bc his mom approves so all is good in life

‘you’ve grown so much, y/n-chan! so much prettier too!’ you turned bashful at her compliments.

then she leaned forward to whisper in your ear but made her voice loud

‘say, has my son finally ask you to be his girlfriend?’

omg mama iwaizumi really ships it

iwa turns red and complains to his mom about being in his business too much

‘don’t be so timid, hajime! y/n-chan could be taken from under your nose any minute now!’

‘dont you think i know that’ he mumbles but very lowly so that no one hears him

but you decide to tease him more

‘no. but i’m waiting for it. i’ll tell you once he does, auntie!’

fed up with the teasing, he grabs you and drags you up to his room to change into comfortable clothing

you sit on his bed while he rummages through his closet for a sweatshirt and sweatpants

‘here! change into these!’ he shouts, still flustered and refusing to look at your eyes

youre an oikawa and you lived to tease so you stood up, tossing the clothes to the side and wrapping your arms around his neck

ooo gurl you want iwa to die today, don’t you?

he gets even redder and scowls

‘oi, y/n, what are you doing’

you shook your head

‘nothing. i just miss my prince iwa-chan. you were so brave for saving me today, prince iwa-chan’

the nickname used to not affect him that much but now, he watches the it fall from your cherry lips

‘say my name’

you furrowed your eyebrows

‘iwa-chan?’

he gently shakes his head no

‘my real name’

‘iwaizumi hajime’

you say, distracted at the way his mouth moves

‘and what’s yours?’

‘iwaizumi y/n’

you breathed out

he growls softly before taking your sinful lips

wowza jesus took the wheel bc he stepped on that pedal

we going straight 100 mph up in this bih

iwa really said, ‘skip the confession. imma go straight for my babie girl’s lips. also, proposal who? let’s go get married in vegas!’

it wasnt even been literally 15 minutes until you came bounding the stairs wearing hajime’s signature grey hoodie with his seijoh sweatpants and calling for your auntie to announce you were now dating are going to get married

‘WHAT!?’ 

she screams and comes running from the kitchen, holding a ladle

you flashed a grin while iwa shows a small smile with red cheeks from behind you before telling you that you were both too young to get married

‘i told ya you would be the first to know’

after dinner, you call your brother and hes like, ‘okay, since you’re not at home i’m assuming youre at iwa’s’

‘omgomgomg, nii-chan! i just had dinner with my boyfriend’s family! they accepted me!’

‘BOYFRIEND?! DOES IWA-CHAN KNOW!? HOW COULD YOU BREAK HIS HEART?!’

oikawa just has that special type of voice that even without being on speaker phone, it sounds like he is

iwa laughs at his friend’s worried questions

‘better hand over your princess to the prince, grand king’

oikawa screamed

i hope i did my mans justice 

[forbidding-souda]

nsfw alphabet for gundham please? tysm!

NSFW A-Z with Gundham Tanaka

I got you!!! 

Some of them are copy and pasted from past posts bc I’ve done them before

-Mod Souda

A - Aftercare

He has kind hands, ones that can hold you.

His ability to communicate is not the best, but he is willing to take criticism.

Cuddling is still a really weird thing for him. He’s stiff and can’t take the skin on skin contact for more than an hour. 

B - Body part

To touch? He likes to run his fingers up and down your naked back. He feels every curve, every muscle, and lets his index finger trace your spine. With each of your breathes, your ribcage expands, his hands following the rhythm. 

The pain of his fingernails digging into your shoulders with each of his trusts reminds you of the small red lines you still have from the night before - trailing from your shoulder blades down to the curve of your ass.

C - Cum

Okay let me get this one out of my system. But like,,, overstimulating this fucker?? womp womp womp. You have to wrap his hands up so he won’t try to hold onto you. Just watching him squirm is enough. 

But the lewd noises that leave his mouth are all you need to make sure he won’t stop cumming. Even when it’s sensitive, and he’s begging for a break, you won’t stop until he can barely talk anymore. 

By the second time you’ve made him cum, over twenty minutes has passed. He can still hold up his fight. 

Still call you pet names and bite his lips with an anxious laugh. 

But by the fourth, or fifth time, you just smile while listening to his wet ah’s.

D - Dirty secret

He likes smells. Things like slick, cum, sweat, or even your breathe when you pant against his lips. 

The smell of you getting home from a run, where the sporty clothes you wear are so easy to peel off.

E - Experience

Zero. None. Nada. Absolutely none.

Doesn’t even like watching porn or other couples kissing.

He’s like ok *walks away*

Not much of a contact person to this day, too.

F - Favorite position

From behind. Yeahhh.

It helps him with the anxiety, since you can’t see him.

He doesn’t have to worry about you judging him. There’s no need to be self conscious from that angle.

G - Goofy

Not very goofy, and if anything, he takes it surprisingly seriously. He doesn’t think of sex as a fun activity, or something to do to spend time.

H - Hair

I think he cares a lot about the hair on his head to not care about his body hair.

I’m also thinking that he probably doesn’t even have that much.

I - Intimacy

He’s very tense, and a little drawn back. Always clenching his fists and biting his lips. 

Only when he’s overstimulated does he let go of himself fully, letting his tongue fall out of his mouth as his whole body loses all of its battle.

J - Jack off

He hardly ever. Like, it’s such a rare occasion. But he has to be completely isolated. No background noise. Nothing to distract him from himself. 

He makes sure to barricade the door so no one can get in. He likes to masturbate bent over, usually with his shoulders on the bed and the rest of him stiff. With one hand stroking himself, the other hand will grasp the bedsheets in an attempt to release the pleasure somewhere else.

K - Kink

He likes having his hands tied together by his own scarf. To be forced down by something so sentimental to him is almost irresistible.

Humiliation is something that edges him without effort. He gets flustered easily, almost too easily, and it’s something you take advantage of.

L - Location

The guest room, since it does not home his hamsters. He would not want his precious babies watching the lewd actions he does.

M - Motivation

This mf gets turned on just by hearing your shower run. The idea of you being naked, even not in a dirty sense. 

He can’t help but let his mind wonder at it. 

He just loves showering with you. It’s almost the only thing that keeps him going.

He gets turned on the moment the two of you are isolated, and in the situation where you stand right in front of him, putting your hands on his sides. 

The contact is so sexually passive-aggressive. Like you’re holding him in place. Smaller things, like both of your hands on his shoulders, throws him into shock for tiny seconds.

N - No

Any type of animal play. Things like cat ears or the petnames kitten or puppy.

He does not find the idea of animals to be sexy. At all.

O - Oral

Not really a taker or a giver. He doesn’t like the idea of it, and would much prefer using his hands. 

With that, he can dig his face into the crook of your neck as he does.

P - Pace

Very rough, even if it’s unintentional. Even his kisses are rather aggressive. 

He is just a big hunk of a man.

Q - Quickie

No way. None at all, unless he manages to drink Teruteru’s altered soup again.

R - Risk

.. A little.. he likes risk a little bit. He likes the way it makes his heart increase. 

Gives him a high without the touch of others.

Makes him feel a bit empowered whenever the two of you get caught.

S - Stamina

Has a really good stamina, surprisingly. A very powerful man.

Once he starts enjoying himself, it’s hard for him to calm down. He’s obsessed with the way you kiss and the curves of your body. So beautiful to him. All he wants is to grip onto the headboard and kiss all over your collarbones.

T - Toy

Hhhhhhhhhh the first thing that comes to my mind of course is vibrators <3. 

Do I think this man is a bottom? Yes. 

Okay, wait another idea just came to my head. 

Because I don’t think Gundham is a very contact-y sexual person, so what if instead of penetrating his partner himself he just uses a vibrator on them. 

Omg I might be on to something there.

U - Unfair

A bright smile comes to his face whenever he hears you whine against his rough kisses. He is such a tease when he feels confident enough. Your noises fuel him more than anything.

V - Volume

He isn’t loud unless you’re the one taking control of him. Usually, when he’s dominant, he is focused on you, and not himself. But the amount of ah’s that fall from his lips when you play with him is infinite.

W - Wild Card

I’m just gonna use this to say why do people think he’s into pet play ya’ll PLEASE- animals are like his escape route from his horrible childhood why would he be sexually attracted to something animal-related I am HORRIFIED.

X - Xray

HEhehherbejhkrbfkjehw

I feel like his shit is long as hell.

He’s packing ngl.

don’t argue with me because you won’t win

Huge titties huge dick

Y - Yearning

Nah, I don’t think he would go out of his way to seek out sexual things. Kisses are even hard for him to get through at times. Is he touch-starved? Yes. Does he want to be touched? Not all of the time.

Z - Zzzz

More breathless than tired.

Will still get up to feed his animals and make sure they are okay - as if they would get worried that he was gone for so long.

[oswaldsleftbicep]

Ok but now the brothers being by their wifes side while she gives birth... just.. I am just addicted I'm sorry haha. Stay safe^-^

lucia, levy, & mefy + helping their fem!so through childbirth

hey,,, how y'all doing,, it's been a minute lmao i took a fat break and i started a new semester literally last monday how has it not even been two weeks yet so i've been burned out and just remembered this blog oops; i'll try to be more good about filling requests!!

genre: comfort, fluff

cw: labor and childbirth, brief mentions of anxiety and death in mefy's part but no one dies i promise

Lucia

❧ he's super serious and very mature the whole time, like he shows no sign of being nervous or scared

❧ don't get me wrong, deep down mans is sweating bullets, but he's got it in his head that he has to be your rock during this process

❧ like you're already going through so much; childbirth is excruciating and traumatic, so him being scared won't do anything to help ease the situation

❧ so he swallows his own anxieties and remains calm and reliable for you

❧ he absolutely holds your hand the entire time, unless you let go first; he doesn't care how hard you squeeze or that his fingers have been numb for the past 16 minutes

❧ he also wipes away the sweat from your face and makes sure your hair stays out of your way, anything to make you even the slightest bit more comfortable

❧ he's talkative but not annoyingly so, like he'll tell you such sweet and encouraging things or make lighthearted jokes to make you smile a bit

❧ he also helps coach you right alongside the midwives, making sure you're breathing right and not overexerting yourself

❧ his focus remains on you the entire time; he's only vaguely aware of everything else going on in the surrounding area

❧ but as soon as the child is born his attention, as well as yours, turns immediately to the crying bundle of joy

❧ the midwives take the baby away to get cleaned up, and his attention turns right back to you and he praises you, telling you how good you did and how amazing you are

❧ when the baby gets handed back to you, he just stares at the two of you in amazement, his two precious beings, and he's so glad to call the two of you his

Levy

❧ he's so nervous, like he probably even gets sympathy pains or whatever

❧ but he's not overdramatic about it like some men, like the guys who have to lie down while their wife is in labor bc they can't handle it -_-

❧ not levy tho, he recognizes that him being nervous and freaking out won't help so he sucks it up and turns his focus to encouraging you

❧ he lets you hold his hand of course, but ngl he winces a little at how hard your grip is but he's respectful and has the decency to not say anything

❧ he lowkey repeats everything that the midwives say cuz he's not really sure how to help coach you other than by saying "you're doing great"

❧ if your labor lasts a long time or if you have a longer amount of time in between contractions he'll read a book to you to help pass time and distract you

❧ unlike lucia, he's hyper aware of his surroundings and is focused on every little thing that's going on in the room. is it because he's just anxious or because he wants to make sure you're safe and there's nothing to harm you? i'll let you decide

❧ let's skip forward to after the baby is born and the midwives take them to get cleaned up, levy lowkey almost gets up to follow them cuz he's like "hey that's my kid, where are you taking them??" but he realizes and quickly turns to care for you

❧ he helps you get cleaned up a bit too while praising you with the softest voice and smile

❧ when your child gets placed on your chest and all he can do is stare at them

❧ he gently and hesitantly reaches out to caress their arm and he just starts bawling bc he's so happy

❧ once everyone is all cleaned up and refreshed, you bet he's gonna be in that bed with you, holding the two most important people in his life

Mefy

❧ he's very, very calm during the whole ordeal, but only externally

❧ internally he's a mess; he's so anxious and very worried for your health and the health of the baby. he knows you have the best available medical professionals assisting you, but his mind can't help but slip to the statistics about infant mortality and SIDS and maternal mortality

❧ he's finally found someone he cares about more than life, and that number is gonna increase soon. he cannot lose that.

❧ he keeps quiet though, no way is he gonna tell you about those worries

❧ he's actually pretty quiet the entire time, only speaking up to ask occasional questions to the midwives or to encourage you and see how you're holding up

❧ he mostly just wants to stay out of the way and let everyone do their thing, stepping in only when needed

❧ in between contractions he'll distract you with a little magic show, nothing too overstimulating but just enough to give you some calm

❧ he's not really gonna say anything other than the encouragements and praises because he doesn't want to annoy you with small talk stuff, you're already going through it enough as is

❧ the first thing he does once the baby is born is he kisses your head. you did it, you gave life to someone of your own creation

❧ your baby gets handed back to you and he just looks between the two of you for a while

❧ you end up being the one to invite him to touch his child, and he's soso gentle and he's got this look of disbelief and utter elation; his life really can be worth something good

[helaintoloki]

hiii so i saw your holiday prompt list and i loved how wholesome it is?? how is that legal. but anyway, i was wondering if you could perhaps do n. 12 with peter parker 🥺👉👈 hope you’re doing well & staying safe!

a/n: ngl I got really excited when I saw this request in my inbox bc it’s been so long since I’ve last written for Peter! anyway I hope you enjoy lovely ♡

warnings: some awkwardness, fluff

* #12: wrapping gifts together // taken from this prompt list

Endless yards of wrapping paper and colorful bows litter the floor in a manner that makes Peter feel as if he has to walk through some maze-like obstacle course just to reach the plate of gingerbread cookies on the coffee table. In the center of all the holiday clutter and chaos you sit, diligently removing the price tags and labels from your gifts before setting them aside to be packaged and wrapped when you’re ready. Your brows are creased with concentration, and if not for the fact that Peter had nearly ate it when his foot got caught in the wrapping you never would have detected his presence.

“Oh my god, are you okay?” You exclaim, your attention now focused on Peter who grips a little too tightly onto the arm of the couch for support. An embarrassed laugh leaves his lips as he steadies himself before carefully walking the rest of the way to sit down beside you.

“Yeah, I’m fine. Good reflexes, you know?” He says with a small shrug, hoping you don’t notice the intense indents he’s made in the fabric of the couch. Luckily, you don’t, and you even let out a small laugh at his antics before returning your attention to your previous task.

“Thanks again for letting me wrap gifts here. It’s just been so crazy back at home and I wouldn’t have been able to get anything done,” you ramble with a flustered smile, one that Peter is quick to return.

“Yeah, no, it’s no problem. No problem at all,” he says nonchalantly, though the rapid beating of his heart says otherwise. “Happy to help.”

“And you’re sure May doesn’t mind?”

“Are you kidding? You know May loves you.” And also won’t stop bugging me about mustering up the courage to finally ask you out, so here we are. “You’re always welcome over.”

“I appreciate that,” you murmur quietly, a soft glimmer in your eyes that Peter can’t quite decipher no matter how many times he tries. Your ability to be so vulnerable and open while simultaneously keeping your cards close to your chest mystified him to no end, and the fact that he could never quite read you properly always left him feeling anxious and unsure of himself. He liked you, really liked you, but he had no idea of knowing whether or not you felt the same.

You’d been friends with Peter since eighth grade; as the new girl at school with no one to sit with at lunch, you’d chosen to befriend the boy with the Star Wars lunch box and Iron Man pencil case. He was quiet but friendly enough, and in no time at all you became two peas in a pod. You did everything together, told each other everything— well, almost everything— and helped each other through various heartaches and heartbreaks. Peter was your best friend, and you were his (you were tied with Ned in first place, but that’s not the point) which is why his newfound feelings for you freaked him out so much. There was a lot at stake when it came to his predicament; he didn’t want to risk ruining your friendship, but he also couldn’t afford the distraction. After the events of the blip Peter found that he had to work harder than ever now when it came to his superhero duties, and he didn’t want to make you feel neglected or unimportant. He also didn’t want to put you in danger, something that was bound to happen if you two began a relationship.

Ned had argued that at this point you were already in danger anyway; your best friend was Spider-Man and you didn’t even know it, so being the girlfriend of Peter Parker wouldn’t make things any different. Admittedly, this revelation did not make Peter feel any better, but he knew his friend had a point. The only problem now was figuring out how to tell you, and then how to pick up the pieces of his broken heart if you were to turn him down. Peter was definitely no Casanova, but he figured taking baby steps would help him get there, and so here you are sitting on his living room floor wrapping presents together and munching on May’s specialty gingerbread cookies.

“I can’t wait to see the look on Betty’s face when she opens her gift,” you say with a giddy smile as you begin to wrap her present. Peter watches carefully as your skillful fingers fold and tape the corners of the wrapping paper together before neatly placing a bow on top. There’s something about the way your eyes seem to sparkle with glee as you write Betty’s name on the gift tag before carefully setting it aside for later. If he could do so without looking like a total creep, Peter would stare at you for hours. He could get lost in your eyes, feel his heart swoon whenever you smiled, and enjoy the tiny boost to his ego you gave him when wearing the Spider-Man themed Christmas sweater your mom had gifted you a while back.

“Is there any chance I’ll get to see my present today?” Peter asks innocently, laughing at the suspicious glare you shoot his way.

“Fat chance, Parker. I was smart enough to wrap yours at home before I came here,” you jest with a teasing smile.

“Come on, not even a little hint?” He begs, making sure to put on his best pout.

“Hey mister, maybe that look works on May but it does not work on me,” you chide only to burst into a fit of giggles. Peter lets out a dramatic sigh, a dejected smile forming across his lips.

“It was worth a try.”

“Don’t worry, I promise you’ll love your gift,” you reassure him. “And if you don’t, well, just pretend to like it to spare my feelings.”

“No, I’m sure I’ll like it,” he chuckles, handing you the scissors at your signaling and watching you get to work on the next gift. He can’t help but shift his gaze towards his own messily wrapped presents sitting underneath the tree; he didn’t have as many friends as you did, so he could spare to ditch his usually frugal spending habits and buy nicer gifts for the ones he loved. A bottle of that high-end perfume May always gushed about yet never bought for herself, a nice hat for Ned to make up for the time at Liz’s party, and finally the most expensive gift of all, a Tiffany and Co. bracelet that he’d be spending the next few months paying off with what little money he could scrounge up.

Odd jobs, extra chore money, and painful goodbyes resulting from the sales of some of his favorite collectibles allowed for the purchase of the jewelry. Time and time again you’d told Peter not to worry about birthday presents or holiday gifts; a simple card or something homemade was good enough for you, but this year Peter knew he had to go big if he was to finally seal the deal. You weren’t just any other girl, you were his best friend and he fell in love with you, so when he finally mustered up the courage to ask you out on Christmas Eve just like he’d been planning to all month he knew had to make sure it was special.

“Peter,” you call out gently, redirecting his attention away from the presents and towards your puzzled features, “you alright there, buddy? You spaced out on me again.”

“Oh, y-yeah, sorry,” he apologizes quickly, shaking away his previous thoughts and doing his best to remain calm and collected despite how fast his heart is racing at the possibility of finally being able to call himself your boyfriend by Christmas time. “What were you saying?”

“I was saying I finished wrapping.”

“Whoa, wait, that fast?” He exclaims astonished.

“That fast,” you confirm with a nod, grabbing a stray bow from the coffee table as you rise from the floor and stretch out your stiff limbs. An amused chuckle falls past Peter’s lips as you attach the bow to the top of his head before extending your hand towards him. “I’m hungry, let’s go get food.”

“So demanding,” he teases, taking your hand and hoisting himself up off the ground.

“Oh, I’m sorry. May we please obtain sustenance, my dear friend?” You retort sarcastically only for Peter to roll his eyes and playfully nudge your side in response.

“Very funny,” he laughs dryly, though the corners of his eyes crinkle with delight at your teasing manner. He sighs, “alright, let’s go get you something to eat.”

“You see, this is why we’re best friends.”

“Yeah,” Peter utters with a quiet smile, his gaze once again settling on the poorly wrapped little box underneath the Christmas tree, “best friends...”

Christmas Eve can’t come soon enough.

[flowersofjannah]

salaam again sis it's me! again, appreciate your beautiful response and i do feel that i can confide in u even if it's on anon rn. honestly, i feel that after the uni guy situation im not so sure if i can trust myself/ my gut or any signs with if someone is the one, anymore. this upsets me as with the uni guy, he brought a strange sense of calmness and familiarity i hadnt felt before so naturally having accounted for that and other strange things i felt he was definitely the one. now that he's obviously married to someone else and things didnt work out even after i ensured to do things halal way from the outset, i cant help but doubt my choices - i had never been like this before but the uni guy situation has made me v wary about believing my gut when it comes to if a man feels like he might be the 'one'. hehe im glad ive found someone similar to me ^-^ i pray Allah also grants u someone who he thinks is best for you iA, u have such a pure soul sis. wrt the ring so i checked this v quickly and i believe he wasnt wearing a ring - actually i first checked this to be sure before letting my interest develop. if i saw a ring i wouldve shut down these thoughts there and then but ive been told that not all muslim married men wear rings so i dont want to become too hopeful just on this basis. i guess i'll see what happens on monday iA and if, like this week, Allah makes me encounter him this week etc too. it's strange bc i started noticing him since last week more even though ive been working at this place now for 2 months or so. i was talking to Allah about it and how i hope he doesnt come by the next day as i felt that i was thinking about him too much, then funnily the morning after he was the first person i saw and spoke to for the first time (just to ask if a room was free but still, i guess he knows i exist now lol), then even the day after i saw him twice. i saw him again before leaving on friday and ngl i did feel a little jealous when i saw him next to this other lady, and when i came by he didnt look up once. im sure he's not interested in me at all. he does seem veryyyy focused on just getting the work done, which is typical in the setting im in but i guess that's what i like about him from what ive observed. unlike a lot of (muslim) men here who talk unnecessarily to opp gender/ too much - he seems quite to the point and sort of goes off doing his own thing quietly. i've also seen him in the prayer room once before but that's all ik about his religious side. again, just to remind u he hasnt done anything specifically towards me to indicate he's eeven interested in me in the slightest. he probably just sees me as a new trainee who's started her first job and thats it, if he even remmebers me at all. anyway, im trying to be open about how things go either way iA but ive always hated being noticed/ talking to get noticed esp about things like these so idk if ill be able to build the courage to do so. i guess i still have a back up which is to ask the mutual colleague when theyre back in january - but from what ik this colleague doesnt know much about him either unfortunately and funnily the guy didnt even remember the mutual colleague even after a few encounters/ months of the colleague having worked there so idk. guess i just want my heart to be content with whatever at this stage. i really just hope to end up with a mature, loyal, calm, God-conscious man someday when Allah thinks best iA. I hope i'll be able to recognise him, and him, me

Wa 'alaykum assalam <3

Tbh sis, sometimes you don’t recognize “the one” from the start. I’ve heard multiple stories where people thought it wouldn’t work out and then they get married. My cousin is one of them, she wasn’t attracted to her now husband (I mean she didn’t think of him ugly, she just wasn’t inclined towards him i guess is a better choice of words) nor find him interesting in the first few talks, but the interest and all developed gradually. So you never know how he’ll come.

Do what you’re comfortable sis, either way if he’s for you, you’ll find him in front of you someday. If you wish to take a chance, go for it. If you don’t wish to and wish to take time to see how you feel/how he is, that’s fine too! See how you feel after istikhara about him and what happens, in sha Allah you'll get clarity.

I totally get your not trusting the intuition part, I feel that for myself also. I pray Allah gives you a kind, respectful, grateful man who only has eyes for you and will hold your hand all the way into janna. Someone who takes his deep seriously and will take great care of you with a heart of love, mercy, and compassion towards you, allahumma ameen.

I appreciate your updates sis, and I love the length of them. I love how you pour all of your thoughts out. I appreciate you talking to me. You’re so sweet 💗

[orphic-osamu]

Hi Yue! First of all, I'd like to say that I love your works!! You are an amazing writer - I can't get enough!! And second, I'd also love to see more of Atsushi (this precious baby) so I was wondering if you could do a headcanon wherein his s/o is afraid of cats/felines and when he turned into a tiger, they just got absolutely scared and almost ran for their life. How would he handle that and how would he help his s/o get over their fear? 🤔

i’m glad you love them fkskdkd 🥺 i’ve read everything you’ve written n I love them all ❤️ this was also challenging for me to write, since it’s something i haven’t thought about before, but here you go!

s/o who is afraid of felines

here’s the thing,,

no one

i mean NO ONE

told you of atsushi’s ability

yes, you knew he had one, but you weren’t aware he’d turn into an animal you hated

and you find out the worst way possible

someone tries to pull some funny shit on you, and you’re freaking out

now bb atsushi tryna protect you, turns into a tiger

you almost shat your pants

imagine just seeing a tiger outta no where

the scream that left ur mouth almost shattered glass ngl

you’re shaking, tryna run away

tiger boi is confused

but then he realized that ur scared of him

when the strength returned to your legs, you try to get up n run

which led to you on the verge of fainting bc there’s a fucking tiger after you

your legs trembled and bada bing bada boom, you’re on the floor again

atsushi tried to appear less threatening, but whatever he does you look like you’re gonna die

your eyes are closed n your hands are shielding your face

in the midst of crying, he hugged you

so you finally look up n u see atsushi

but w tiger face???

what???

then you felt the fur brushing against your skin

reader = wHAT THE FUCK

but the paws? are? connected? to? atsushi’s? arm?

basically you fainted.

the next day, the first thing u do is check your lover’s arms

n atsushi’s just upset bc u seemed pretty afraid of him

so he told to sit down, while he made a cup of tea for you (or whatever drink if you don’t like tea)

he calmly explained to you that tiger = atsushi

idk whats w my writing rn pls send help its 2am

you’re shit scared of felines but you wanted to try not to be scared of your own bb

he got you to be less scared gradually

it started w just shifting his limbs into the tiger ones

for a while, your only challege was to be able to look at them w/o panicking

it was hard at first, but you found that as long as you kept reminding yourself that it was atsushi, and he’d never hurt you, you’d stay calm

it got a little harder to stay still when his face changed slightly, but w weeks it became easy

all bc u could still make his face out

ya but when he went full on tiger?

you were paralyzed on your spot

he switched back immediately, tending to you

it took weeks before you found your ”safe spot”

and when you did, you asked him to shift

he was hesitant at first

when he did however, you focused and focused

his eyes

his eyes were your safe spot

bc even if nothing looked like atsushi, his eyes held the same adoration, concern and gentleness

soon you could alr touch him

his fur, which felt icky at first was now fluffy under your fingers

cuddle sessions in his tiger form became common when he was too tired to switch back

and when he is in need of ear rubs

thinking you were over it, you tried going to the zoo w atsushi

yeah, you went home early that day

turns out you were only fine w atsushi

however it still made you jump a little when he used his ability out of nowhere

but his ability was something you grew to love and find security in

a complete change from the horrors you saw at first :)))

i absolutely loved writing this! im sorry if it seems loopy and not serious fkskdk

[i-amusemyself]

Every and all countries.

HEY ITS MY FAVE ANON!!!! 😄😄😄💕 Thankies!!!! (Sorry for the delay, ive barely had internet)

America: What is your favourite place to eat?I’m not really sure 😂 I dont ever really go out to eat and if I do I just end up going to McDonalds or Nandos tbh

Australia: Do you have any quirks when speaking? ….I don’t know, I don’t pay much attention! I know if my head is somewhere else I’m terrible at keeping eye contact. Besides that I basically just laugh for one reason or another and say sorry 24/7.

Austria: already answered

Belarus: Is there anyone that you love? Family/friends/romantic interest etc.Oh hell yeah definitely!! I love my family one way or another ig. My friends, even the ones I don’t see often, I absolutely adore! I have like 5 people I would legit die for 😂

Belgium: What do you think of your siblings?I dont have any. I wish I did tho.

Botswana: Do you like to sing? Why?Yeah, I like singing since it sometimes helps when my mood gets down. I only really do it when I’m alone tho bc im shy

Bulgaria: Who do you consider close to you?I have 3 close friends tbh and id trust them with just about anything

Cameroon: Describe your culture.Lmaoooo what culture? 😂 I’m basically english and i dont even know if the things associated with that would be considered cultural? Idk we just drink tea, say sorry and are supposed to have a stiff upper lip at all times

Canada: Favourite wintertime activity?Not having to go to school 😂 idk tbh, sledging is kinda fun from what i remember?

China: already answered

Cuba: What sort of grudges do you hold if any?I very rarely hold grudges tbh, I let 99% of things go even if people don’t apologise. It’s hard to say where the line is without sounding overdramatic. I guess if they made my life so bad I considered ending it I wouldnt like someone too much (or if others saw that and continued to stay friends with them).

Cyprus: already answered

Denmark: Do you wish for something of your past?Nah, not really. I try my best to look forward, not back.

Egypt: Do you stand up for what you believe in? How?Ummmm, I’m not sure I could say I’m that active in it. I once wrote a long, anonymous letter to the headteacher or my school wrt the treatment and education of lgbt people. Besides that? I havent dont much. I’d go to a protest if there was one nearby that I supported.

England: Are you controlling?That’s hard to answer? Because when things happen my initial instinct is to control them. But I’m a lot more chilled out than I used to be, and continuing to try to improve on it. So the amount of things I actively try to control are very slim. The issues lies more with my hatred of vague plans tbh 😂

Estonia: Do you think people often misunderstand you?I don’t open up to that many people, not really. Most the therapists I’ve seen have never got me at all. In terms of friends, some do get it, though it depends upon what specifically I’m trying to explain/show etc.

Finland: What do you prefer; kindness, sternness or apathy?Kindness, for sure. It’s nice to know other people might look out for you when you’re not necesarily in a place to look out for yourself. Sternness is just,, hard to communicate with and apathy can put me on edge.

France: How do you share love for those you care for?Most the time I just send them memes 😂 I try to make sure I’m honest and I don’t hold back with compliments. I also try to show then that I really am interested in them/their life, tho sometimes I worry I’m annoying them.

What is the hardest thing you have ever had to do?4 A levels whilst also juggling 3 jobs at one point.

Germany: Do you have a hard time forgiving yourself?I rarely forgive myself for something without outside help, and even then it isnt guaranteed

Ghana: What is your favourite sport?Basketball, its the only one I understand 😂

Greece: Do you let others help you when in need?I do sometimes tell my closest friends if I’m in a really bad patch and out of options. Although, I become more focused on making them feel helpful than actually being honest when I can’t believe them etc.

Hungary: Who is the person you trust the most?My closest friends probably. Although there are different kinds of trust, so it varies with what I’m trusting and who I go to etc.

Hutt River: What is the most memorable dream or nightmare you’ve had?I remember most of my dreams tbh, and for months too. Nightmares especially, but i wont share those bc theyre really horrific tbh. I had a dream a few months back that I died and went to heaven, that was nice. Like, it just felt so calm, I didnt want to wake up.

Hong Kong: Do you fear death?I dont so much fear death as fear excessive pain and suffering tbh. I’m okay with not knowing what, if anything, happens after we die.

Iceland: Do you hide your real personality? Why?Not reaaally 😂 when I’m with people I know and trust I can pretty much be myself. But different people bring out different parts of me.There is a small part I crush right down bc I hate it, but it might slowly be fading.

India: How important is family to you?Idk, I’ve never felt super close to a lot of my family. I just sort of seem to find my own family, and theyre hella important to me.

Japan: Tell us a secret about yourself.I dont have that many secrets????? At all??? And the ones I do have I don’t tell for a reason 😂 lets go with: i have 2 moles and a shoulder dimple that look like a blob fish.

Kenya: What is your favourite wild animal?I love so many of them?!?!?!?! I love capybaras but also elephants and also gorillas???

Korea: What is one thing you accomplished by yourself?Ah, I never do anything completely by myself 😂 Idk, managing to get to america on my own was pretty scary, but I did it.

Kugelmugel: Is there anyone you have a love hate relationship with?I mean according to my anxiety, everyone I love hates me 😂But erm, the only person who I can really think of is my old geography teacher. He was a legend and I loved him, but for sure he hated me.

Latvia: Do you believe you are brave?Eh, idk. I don’t think I’m a coward, but it would depend on the situation.

Ladonia: What is the internet site you visit most often?Tumblr. I cant deny it.

Liechtenstein: How do people underestimate you most often?I have no idea, they usually overestimate me, though I don’t pay much attention to peoples expectations 😂 I genuinly have no idea, maybe I should ask my friends or something

Lithuania: Do you desire power?My initial answer is no, I’m not that interested in being powerful on a large scale. But I guess there are different kinds of power? Like, it would be nice to have the power to change other peoples lives for the better. Or the power that comes with being in government, which has always been something I’ve been interested in.

Macau: What is your favourite festival or celebration?Halloween. Without a doubt.

Molossia: Do you consider yourself strong?I used to think I was strong, given some of the things I’ve been through. Now though I realise I just supressed all the emotions that came with them, which are all coming back, and honestly I’m a weak mess.

Monaco: Do you think you are a lucky person?No, not really. 😂 I mean, there might have been 100 times ive narrowly escaped death, but I wouldnt know it.

New Zealand: Would you rather be an elf, dwarf, hobbit or wizard?I’ve never seen lotr/the hobbit ngl so just based on what I know I’ll say wizard bc magic

North Italy: What is your least favourite part of your personality?All of it. Idk, jealousy. Awkwardness. Inability to make conversation. Just who I am as a person.

Norway: What was the most disappointing time in your life?Idk, Ive been disappointed a lot 😂 my dad let me down p bad once, though i dont really wanna share the deets

Netherlands: Most generous thing someone has ever done for you?My best friend bought me a necklace with “you are the light of my life” on it and I still can’t get over how cute that is 😄

Poland: Hardest thing you’ve been through?The thing that comes to mind was the longest and most stressful night of my life. I’d just broken up from school for summer that day and we had an estate agent coming to value the house the next day so we could move out of the Flood Zone. That evening it rained and rained and I ran around the village asking council people to help us but no one came so we stayed up till 2am pouring water from around the house into wheelie bins to try and stop it coming in. Then I had a breakdown in the bath and just remember feeling so trapped. I never want to go through that again.

Prussia: Would you prefer to live forever or die alone?Oooooh thats a tough one! Bc living forever would surely involve a lot of time alone. I think I’d hate it tbh, 80 years is enough for me 😂 but dying alone is like, my greatest fear tbh. So I’ll say live forever.

Roman Empire: How would you like to be remembered?Idk, just as a good person that maybe helped a few people out, I suppose. I mean, sure I’d love to find a cure for cancer and change the world etc but gotta be realistic

Romania: What is something you are very ashamed of?There are parts of my body I hate so much I’ve genuinly considered taking a knife to them myself. I also struggle to deal with the whole gender/sexuality thing, no matter how much people tell me its okay.

Russia: Have you ever suffered from low self esteem? Do you still?For sure, yeah. I really struggle to love myself in any way, it’s an alien concept to me and I’ve always been taught to keep my mouth shut about anything I actually do like.

Sealand: Who is your best friend?My bro @only-slightly-dangerous lmao

Seborga: What is your favourite beverage?I absolutely looove milkshakes (despite being lactose intollerant 🙄), especially oreo ones

Seychelles: How do you handle people being rude to you?Lmaooo I don’t 😂 if they say anything personal, I take it to heart. I might try to talk back but I’d just screw it up.

South Italy: What is your favourite part of your personality?Ummm, idk, I don’t really think about the words I could use to describe my personality? I guess I quite like my sense of humor. Idk.

Spain: What would you tell to the person or people you hurt most if you had a second chance?I don’t want to sound like,,, a twat,,, but I don’t really think I’ve ever really badly hurt someone (not knowingly or intentionally anyway). The only person I can think of is someone I cut off for being a bad friend… so I don’t really feel too bad about that.

Sweden: Are you a leader, follower or independent?Lmao all of the above, depending on the circumstances 😂 I don’t mind leading things and taking charge, Im quite good at being organised. But equally I don’t mind following other people if I agree with their plans. I also love being independent and doing things alone, bc it feels free and you don’t have to worry about anyone else.

Switzerland: Would you consider yourself evil, good or neutral?Good, I think. I try to be a good person. Sometimes my initial reaction or thoughts might not be good, but I always want to do the right thing.

Thailand: How good is your poker face?If I’m just pissing about, not great. I just laugh. But if I’m serious it’s pretty good, if I can say that 😂 I’m good at acting when I want to be.

Tibet: What do you value most?What?? As in a quality? Or objects?? Idk. People with good intentions, I’ll say that.

Taiwan: What do you think of the people or person who raised you?I have a lot of feelings towards them, not all of them good. I’d rather not talk/think about it rn though.

Turkey: Would you ever want children?Without a doubt, yeah. I’m not sure if I’d have my own or adopt, maybe both. I’m not that naturally maternal; I love kids but knowing how to talk/react to them doesnt come naturally. Im probs more of a dad 😂

Uganda: How would you like others to see you?I dont know???? Just as a kind and trustworthy person that genuinly cares and will always try my best to help when I can.

Ukraine: What is one thing that has made you stronger in life?I have no idea. I don’t feel like a very strong person at all. My life just feels like a long string of events I’ve had to cope with.

Vietnam: What is something you are proud of about yourself?I don’t really,,, feel pride 😂😂😂 like I honestly can’t think of a time I’ve felt like that. I guess I’m pleased I did well in my A levels? But even then I wouldnt say I’m proud.

Yemen: What kind of art do you like?Its hard to describe? I know it when I see it 😂 I’m not too bothered about portraits and paintings of dull landscapes, but equally some modern art is barely Art. I quite like paintings that are bright, or tell a story. I also like sculptures if theyre based on cool stuff like, the human body ooor dragons idk. Mosaics are p nice too

Zimbabwe: Who is your favourite character from any folklaw?I’m not sure I know many folklaws 😂 The person that comes to mind is rumplestiltskin, but I think thats only bc I love his chacter in Once Upon a Time