#and neil and Andrew I'M GOING INSANE

[amalias-whatsoever]

I just finished the king's men and I can't quite wipe the smile of my face

[nothatsmi]

2/4

One wears a "drug" mask and the other a "safe" mask. Pills and contatcts. Pipe dreams and hidden scars.

Then they played hide and seek, and I'm not sure if any of them won or lost the game. Anyway did I say I love Muse-

Midly unrelated stuff: I am falling back into The Raven Cycle I think. I want to draw them so bad. I also want to draw Percy Jackson stuff (I began the second book hehe)! And I need to finish these. Also I started an aftg animatic jkclvqlh why can't I be normal for once-

[shorlinesorrows]

qpr jean and neil. that's all i'm gonna say.

do you see my vision?

[starregulus]

someone drag me back into the aftg fandom so i can finish my fic plz I beg. The bsd brain rot is eating me alive. I cant get those mf losers out of my damn head

[achillesinagaypanic]

I will add myself to the AFTG clutter, well after the trilogy is done:

Currently on TRK after finishing TFC in 2 days, I am hopeful to continue my quick reading. Some notes on my read so far:

I am having a hell of a laugh reading out all of Jean's dialogue with a french southern accent because peuchère il est marseillais le peutchi

I am also crying at the littlest things, like the showers in the first away-game against the terrapins (which I was surprised to discover is apparently a turtle??) But big events leave me indifferent (like Seth, but I think that was meant to be seeing as Neil had about the same reaction) or numb and in shock (like learning Neil BELONGS TO THE MORIYAMAS??? HELLO???? I DIDN'T SEE THAT COMING????)

I should be doing homework. I am not. I will get in trouble. But at least I'll know how this all ends. I love theatre but the power of Adhd hyperfixation is stronger than me </3

I am VERY AFRAID to interact with fandom because I don't want to get spoiled (looking at you, dr who hyperfixation where I know way too much because of AO3) but I will be glad to update to you all my reactions through text as I read through this (though I will slide over most of the "I wish I could go in there and hold/punch him/her"s and "Omg he's so fucking hot"s)

Every character of the team is so fucking attractive and I was 100% shaming myself for my reaction when Kevin full-body-pinned Neil against the wall. 1/2 of my thoughts and reactions are "when is it my turn" or "omg let's switch places".

I was extremely worried when Neil woke up in Nicky's arms after having been drugged because like ???? Did they do anything ????? But then realized that Nicky would do no such thing, despite repeatedly talking about it.

The girls have all my love, seriously, Dan is wonderful as a captain AND as a friend, Renee is so nice I aspire to have her self-control, Allison needs a hug.

ALSO!!! IN THE SHIPS!!! (Because I did discover this off of a gay edit between Andrew and Neil "Yes or no Neil? / It's always yes with you") I fucking love that I can ship Andrew, Neil and Kevin interchangeably. Like, Guard dog and Hurt runaway? Fuck yes. Famous but kept captive and Underdog but free? You got it. Anxiety ball and Dangerous but somehow reassuring? Give me all of it.

OKAY now I need to let my newfound knowledge sink in because wtf was that conversation (Neil and Kevin about the whole lore thing), thank you for reading my thoughts as an excited first-time reader

[sureuncertainty]

oh also hands down one of the best moments of metrocon was when I went up to a booth purely bc it was one of the only ones that had the magnus archives stuff, and asked about it and we started talking about TMA, and then the artist goes here I have something for you, and handed me a teeny tiny book (like i’m talking like not even a square inch big) and it was a FUCKING TINY LEITNER IT HAD THE STICKER IN IT AND EVERYTHING

[recallthename]

okay hear me out. kevin/andrew/neil = louis/lestat/armand

[maple-pies]

AFTG from a D1 perspective

As a D1 athlete from a sport where men and women practice and compete together (thought we are separate teams) here are my thoughts ;)

Whenever the Foxes travel and stay in hotels they have to share rooms (but if Wymack is going to drop the $$ for shower stalls they def don't have to share beds like my team does) but I wonder if they randomize the rooms?? lots of potential there...

(however, USC?? They're big enough that I can def seeing them have to share beds hahahaha)

training trip? do they go on training trip Nora I need to know! Lacrosse sometimes does, so maybe exy would idk... (they go to Florida or PR, Kevin gets hella burnt and Neil gets freckles end of story)

Lift?? They have to be lifting!! I know Aaron and Andrew are really into it and Nicky and Allison fight over the aux

there are days where everyone gets along (even people who hate each other) and there are days where everyones HATES each other (even the people who are best friends) it just happens

men are always puking during practice. Aaron personally gives me big barf boy energy (Nicky canonically yaks already lol)

periods. Having men and women practice together means the women don't GAF about talking about periods while the men stare at their shoes and pretend not to hear hahahha

Abby definitely gets pissed at Wymack and lift coach (they have to have one okay??) for working the foxes too hard, it's the trainer's job to get pissed at coaches okay

just NCAA violations in general. We have to do quizzes and shit to show we know the rules we can't break/rules the school and coach have to follow. (I could make a whole separate post about all the NCAA violations broken haha)

this is no way saying aftg is inaccurate, it just means they didn't ever get caught which checks out

speaking of which, whenever Aaron get's pissed he definitely is like "And we went over 20 hours last week!! I could just report them!!" to Katelyn and she calms him down

Interactions with other teams/greek life. I know there have to be some mixers/athlete events, if not the Foxes then the Trojans for sure.

complaining about dining hall food, I know Kevin's pissed about seed oils or lack of protein, something stupid like that

hookups within the team. okay the Foxes are small, but that just makes it more messy. the trojans have insane teamcest I just know it. (being coed means even more hookups than normal) . cute relationship sex, hate sex, random sex between people you would not believe (i def don't know this from first hand experience what....)

I'm so excited for TSC because we get so see how a "normal" Exy team behaves (I put normal in quotations bc ppl need to understand that D1 athletes, esp ones on a team as good as USC, are definitely not normal people ahahha)

this is definitely just part 1

[catboygretzky]

Exyblr Dashboard Simulator based on what I personally see on sportsblr:

1/?

👑 girlbossriko follow

how many bro jobs do you think it took before riko moriyama and kevin day realized that uh.....maybe this wasn't just a bro thing

👢exyinaphonebooth follow

how many times do they have to come out and say they're like brothers before you freakos stop shipping them

👑 girlbossriko follow

????? do i know u

#it's a tumblr post about two exy players that you'lll never meet in your life it really isn't that deep

558 notes

💃fox-me-up follow

ngl that newest fox is kinda 👀

#psu lb #exy lb

8 notes

👨🏻‍❤️‍💋‍👨🏻 talk-exy-to-me

The NARRATIVE that kevin day and neil josten have........son of exy! scouting the rookie-est of rookies from fuck knows arizona........no listen you dont GET IT winning is EVERYTHING TO KEVIN and he would risk it on the foxes? And NEIL? who has only played exy for a year! NEIL Gets his attention!!!!! And hes good and he's getting better every game and he keeps bitching about kevin's ex on live tv BUT WAIT!???? NOT QUITE WHAT YOU EXPECT! Bc then neil shows up with a number on his cheek BECAUSE WELL it turns out they've known each other since they were KIDS! how is everyone not insane w me THEY'RE LITERALLY PERFECT

#where r my fellow njkd truthers #how r u all not here with me this isnt even the start #kevneil #210 #psu #njkd

102 notes

☀️ usctrojanny

every smiley blonde striker (jeremy knox) needs a brunette wet cat emotional support backliner (jean moreau)

#jerejean #usc trojans #i'm just saying 🤷‍♀️

58 notes

👸🏻 kevindazed follow

did he just......

👸🏻 kevindazed follow

guys please tell me i'm not insane

👸🏻 kevindazed follow

HE'S NEVER BEEN????? SKIIING???? KEVIN WHAT DOES THAT MEAN ?????? KEVIN PLEASE

#i i'm going insane i will literally die if someone doesn't explain this to me HE'S NEVER BEEN SKIING?!!!!

407 notes

🧚 goalie-stan

oh....i'm feeling so weak......it'd sure be nice to have a big strong goalie (renee walker) hold me up (renee if you're free on tuesday i am also free on tuesday.........on tuesday this tuesday, any tuesday?)

#literally passing out just thinking about her holding me don't call don't text i'm busy

84 notes

🌄 softkevinday follow

do u think if u offered kevin day essential oils to heal his hand he'd beat you to death

#it'd be hard for him bc he only has one hand but he could probably do it #legally this is a joke don't do this

284 notes

🗣️ jeremyknoxes follow

feeling normal

215 notes

📜 realexyblog

actually exy rpf is fine, i asked kayleigh day herself and she told me it was fine

112 notes

🐋 sexyexy

'exy is a stupid name for a sport' have you considered that a) i don't care and b) it's named that solely so i can make sex jokes about it

11 notes

🏳️‍🌈 gay4stickball follow

is he, ya know *mimes jerking off* an ncaa exy player

#i don't believe that straight exy players exist

56 notes

🙈 ittybittyminny follow

Andrew Minyard!!!!!!! 🥰🥰 short king!!!!🤏🤏😋😋 Awwwwwwww the scrunkly!!!!! 🤗🤗🤗 My boinky boy!!!!!🥺🥺 Crinkly doo,,,,shronkle scrimblo......🥺🥺🥺 rb if you'd scrunkle!!!!!!! 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺

📖 sapphic-exy follow

he literally killed someone

🙈 ittybittyminny follow

And? God forbid women do anything

#also no proof he did that #yeah there's proof his twin bro killed someone but that's not the same bc theyre different people #almost killing someone doesnt count

807 notes

🐦‍⬛ edgarallenexy

got told i'm problematic for liking the ravens? THAT'S LITERALLY MY SCHOOL OH MY GOD

2 notes

🌸 softexy

Kevin Day - A Study

#kevin day #psu foxes #palmetto foxes #exy #web weave #poetry #psu foxes #palmetto #edgar allen

378 notes

[thepipedream]

I have thoughts that I can't keep to myself. I apologize

Tilda was never a threat to Andrew. Andrew killed Tilda cause she was hurting Aaron.

Nicky's attack happened way before Andrew learned how to handle knives and fight in general. So it was this pint-size little freak putting all his rage into protecting Nicky. He was like no you won't be jumping this mf who left his happy life in Germany to come here take care of us.

He put a knife between Nicky's ribs because Aaron suggested Nicky's wanted to SA Neil.

He almost killed Allison cause she slapped Aaron.(insane but yk)

He choked Kevin to figure out Neil's story.

I can keep going, but the point I'm trying to make is :

Every! Single Time! we see Andrew being violent it's to Protect. Not himself, to protect others. it's never cause it's amusing or cause he is enjoying it. On and Off meds! In exy and irl!

[tiny-planet-13]

I know for a fact I'm not the first person to say this and I literally read a post about it years ago but couldn't begin to tell you where but it literally plagues my mind constantly like just imagine aaron during his studies (cause he does pre-med(?)) like finding out that the medication Andrew was forced to be on isn't even the correct medication and just going batshit insane because how the fuck could they do that to him?! ofc the meds themselves were made up by Nora but (correct me if I'm wrong) they're some sort of antipsychotic right and like I read a line in aftg the other day of Neil talking to Andrew after he's come off his meds realising that Andrew isn't a sociopath yet everyone treats him as such and the medication (the forced mood etc) was meant to "treat" that but HES NOT A SOCIOPATH!!!! I just can't even begin to imagine how Aaron would feel about that

[dayurno]

agh….. there are a lot of little things about kevin’s treatment in tkm especially that really hurt me, but the whole situation with telling wymack is the worst of it. give our boy a break 😭😭😭😭 he’s struggling!

SO MEAN TO HIM i was just talking to luni liaisun about this yesterday but the way kevin is blamed for so many things that are not at all his fault (neil going to evermore out of his own volition, kayleigh hiding that he's wymack's son, neil asking him to lie about his past and not tell the foxes that he's the butcher's son) and subsequently isolated from the group because of that is insane LOL i think kevin and andrew get a pretty similar treatment from the upperclassmen but by the end of tkm andrew has been 'humanized' to them through neil while kevin hasnt yet shown the threshold of humanity needed to be treated like a person worthy of grace and understanding

this is mostly a personal opinion and can be totally disregarded from canon intentions but to me kevin's isolation from the foxes is very relevant to my own experiences of navigating the world while noticeably neurodivergent, and its one of the things that brought me closer to kevin's character in the first place. i think while reading it is easy to agree with how the world at large (and even kevin himself at times) thinks kevin is, but kevin's crime really is that he's weird even among people who are weird; he's annoying and he's overinvested and he's programmed and when you're neurodivergent that's three of the top reasons why people choose to deny you kindness and humanity and understanding. i'm not sure where i was going with this and i'm not the best at articulating my thoughts on this subject, and of course kevin is annoying and intense, but that's not. illegal. you know? a person being annoying to you shouldn't make them an easy target for all of your frustrations and that's, ultimately, a very Autistic Experience

[foxhole-king]

The Devastation that is Neil Josten

I feel like crying about Neil and as you know, if I'm going down, you’re all going down with me :)

There’s just something about the way that Neil only ended up in palmetto because he was tired of running

His mother killed by his father, and for the first time since he was 10, he was completely alone

The one person he was able to trust to watch his back, who protected him, was gone

He kept running, sure, but what’s the point anymore?

He knows this only ends when he dies

But then wymack recruits him

And wymack gives him some security that he hasn't had in a long time (at all??) when he lets Neil keep his duffel bag

The thing that holds all of Neil’s possessions, his lifeline, everything important

And then wymack gives him keys

His first set of keys, the first time he’s been anywhere long enough that he would even need them

And Kevin asks for his game

Even when he finds out who Neil is and knows that Neil will be dead by the end of the season

“Will you still teach me?” “every night”

THAT’S FUCKING DEVESTATING

I can't get into everything with Neil and Andrew here, perhaps that will be another late-night writing, b u t

Andrew told him to stay in exchange for ANYTHING, Andrew gave him protection, he gave him a key and called it home, gave him trust and Neil gave it back in return

And when Neil's time was up, and you know what he did?

He didn’t run

He stayed

He protected ANDREW and his team. He could have kept the deal with Andrew, but he didn't. He broke it off because he knew it would destroy Andrew if it was still in effect when he was kidnapped

It would've done irreparable damage to them, and while Neil thinks he’d still be allowed to stay in palmetto, he’d lose Andrew's trust forever

He’d lose andrew

 and if that happened, he’d never forgive himself and wouldn’t be able to bear staying even if it’s what he wants more than anything

But even tho Neil knew from the beginning that signing with the foxes was a death sentence, even though he has been resigned to it from day 1

He found that once his time was up, he was terrified of leaving, of never seeing them again, of not having a future

And of no one knowing what happened to him

I mean no one wants to be tortured by their insane serial killer father and his goons but-

In that locker room when he realized that this was it, and all he could do was tell Andrew thank you. You were amazing and leave behind his belongings in hopes that his family would realize that he didn’t want to go

That he wanted to stay

But instead, he sat in the car, handcuffed and burnt and bleeding

Throat raw from screaming

And he traced the outline of a key into his hand and said goodbye to Neil Josten so that even tho his father would get his hands on him again and kill him, he would never touch Neil

He became Nathaniel wesninski again, only this time it felt as if Nathaniel was the lie and Neil was the truth

And in a way, that is the truth

Neil Josten is the truest he has ever been

Nathaniel Wesninski was a child beaten and broken and bruised and scarred much to many times over

And when he was taken on the run, he was supposed to be anyone but himself, but always quiet

Always small

To never be seen or known

And Andrew decides that he’s interesting. He sees him. Even when he doesn't want to be seen.

The night he was kidnapped was probably the first time he ever wanted to be found.

And he was found. The foxes found him.

And he will never be taken from them again.

That’s when he realized that yes, they were his, but he was also theirs

And they were never letting go of him

Never again.

[otdiaftg]

The King's Men - Chapter Ten

Day: Thursday, February 8th Time: 4:45 PM EST

The conversation with Kevin the night before still bothered Neil the next day, so he asked the Foxes' goalies about it on break Thursday afternoon. Renee turned her phone over in her hands as she considered it. Andrew didn't even acknowledge the question. "It's an interesting idea," Renee said, "and it seems to be working for him. Asking someone to change his mindset and approach is a tall order, though, especially so late in the season. Then again," she said after a moment, "you did change racquets mid-season." "A racquet is one thing," Neil said. "I don't think I can do this." "If you don't want to, don't," Renee said, as if it was that simple to turn Kevin down. "If you want to try, we will help you any way I can." "No," Andrew said before Neil could answer. "Stop copying him." "I'm trying to get better," Neil said. "I can't improve on my own." Andrew flicked him a bored look and said nothing else. Neil gave him a minute then planted himself in front of Andrew when he realized Andrew really wasn't planning on elaborating or explaining. Renee quietly put her phone away and looked between them. Her gaze lingered on Neil, but Neil didn't return it. He searched Andrew's calm expression for answers. "Why shouldn't I copy him?" Neil asked. "You are never going to play like he does," Andrew said. Before Neil could take that as an insult against his potential, Andrew continued. "He is a fool whose style is numbers and angles. Formulas and statistics, trial and error, repetition and insanity. All he cares about is finding the perfect game." "Is that so bad?" "Don't ask stupid questions." "Don't make me." "A junkie like you can't be that cold," Andrew said. "I'm not a junkie." Andrew just looked at him, so Renee broke in with a careful, "I think he means to say Kevin is very analytical, whereas you're passionate. You both care about winning, but not in the same way." Andrew said nothing to confirm or deny that interpretation, so Neil stepped out of his way. Andrew continued on, done with this conversation.

Art used with permission by Esklinray. Thank you @esklinray!

[kevinsdsy]

I'll gladly elaborate, alright I'm gonna start off by getting the obvious out of the way. SPOILERS FOR TSC.

first off, they were both subjected to SA in some relation to the Ravens. We now know that Drake was sent by Riko, and my guess/assumption is that he did it to force Andrew's hand like how Grayson did for Jean to get his number.

Andrew threatens and has harmed others that touch him because of Drake. Jean does the same albeit it being on reflex. Both of them harmed themselves because of this trauma. They both refuse to elaborate on their feelings and thoughts, they have minimal and expressions and operate on a sort of "auto pilot" Andrew not AS much since he wasn't basically forced to be a machine, since he never joined them but while he was on meds he was a sort of manic which I think counts all things considered.

In terms of Neil, he's the only one for both (pre-Jeremy in Jean's case) where he didn't require them to speak for him to understand them. He was the first to respect their boundaries without questions and he may be Andrew's partner/soulmate but he was also, as Jean describes, Jean's misplaced forever partener/unkept promise.

I used mirror instead of parallel because these similarities aren't enough for me to say they tie to each other in the narrative but they do have meaningful (TO MEEEEEEEEE) similarities because of Perfect Court that I haven't seen people acknowledge 😭

WAITTT ALL OF THESE MAKE SO MUCH SENSE thank you for elaborating btw 🙏🏼🙏🏼 especially because u mentioned “jean does the same albeit it being on reflex” like i do think their reactions to both hurting others and themselves might be a bit different, but obviously it’s still a similarity.

NEIL to both andrew and jean is SO PERSONAL TO ME. like just in general neil’s relationship/dynamic with them makes me go absolutely insane

[seanleannan]

Okay so in no particular order, I haven't read the third book yet, but here are my opinions on The Foxhole Court and The Raven King (SPOILERS BELOW):

- I love Andrew SO MUCH. He's so complicated and funny and literally crazy and I think he's a brilliant character. I love Neil too, and I think Kevin is... fine. I like Nicky, I feel really bad for him. I didn't really form any set opinions on any character until near the middle of the second book, and when the whole scene where they drugged Neil happened I was like UM?!?!?!? Didn't like them for a good bit after that

- My heart actually broke because Neil just wants to play Exy, and he KNOWS he shouldn't sign to the Foxes but he just wants to play the game he loves for one YEAR THAT'S ALL HE WANTS

- The story of how Neil's mum died. And the whole trauma of having to burn her body, and not being able to keep anything of hers (even her phone, and then not having a phone until Andrew forced him) was horrific

- Andrew being physically small and then being the most terrifying, unpredictable agent of chaos is fucking phenomenal

- The other Foxes calling Andrew's gang "the monsters" is soooo good I love that

- I did NOT expect Seth to die and it threw me. I literally had no clue what this book was about when I read it lmao

- Andrew and Aaron's relationship. Oh my god. They literally killed for each other. I am not okay

- The Ravens, as Neil so aptly points out, are ABSOLUTELY A CULT. No one should ever care about anything as much as they care about Exy. It's insane. The matching outfits and the like secret hideout?? Nope. Get me out of there

- I actually can't even talk about the whole bit with Drake because it was so awful, all I'll say is I'm glad that mf is dead

- Andrew trusting Neil with his car AND to protect Kevin?? They're in love, your honour. A weird, fucked up kind of love, but in love nonetheless

- Neil spending Christmas with the Ravens. The forced tattoo. The literal near-death beatings and abuse. All for Andrew

PREDICTIONS FOR THE FINAL BOOK

- Neil's dad is going to appear somehow

- Neil and Andrew are going to have some weird kind of relationship that neither one wants to define and it'll probably end badly and break my heart

- Riko dies (I'm crossing all my fingers and toes for this)