#and my hands are still killing me and i don't think many people actually saw the original cause it was added onto a poll post

[aerialworms-art]

Happy 45th birthday to our favourite hunter!

(Yes that is the same bee blanket)

(ID under cut)

[Image ID: a cartoon-style drawing of Dean Winchester, wrapped in a yellow bee patterned blanket and a bi flag blanket and surrounded by genderless grey people hugging him. One of them is smooching him through the blanket. A few more people are approaching, all enthusiastic, one holding up a blue and green striped blanket. Dean looks puzzled and is blushing. There are lovehearts in the air around him.

The image is watermarked "@aerialworms" /end ID]

[inkskinned]

she's three years younger than i am, and i put on cascada as a throwback, cackling - before your time! i've been borrowing my brother's car, and it's older than dirt, so the trunk is like, maybe permanently locked. when the sun comes through the window to frame her cheekbones, i feel like i'm 16 again. i shake when i'm kissing her, worried i won't get it right.

in 2003, my state made gay marriage legal. where she grew up, it wasn't legal until 11 years later - 10 years ago. if legal protections for gay marriage were a person, that person would be entering 5th grade. online, a white gay man calls the fight for legal marriage boring, which isn't kind of him but it is a common enough opinion.

it has only been 9 years since gay marriage was nationally official. it is already boring to have gay people in your tv. it is already boring to mention being gay - "why make it your entire personality?" i know siblings that have a larger age gap than the amount of time it's been legally protected. i recently saw a grown man record himself crying about how evil gay people are. he was begging us, red in the face - just do better.

i am absolutely ruined any time my girlfriend talks about being 27 (i know!! a child!), but we actually attended undergrad at the same time since i had taken off time to work between high school and college. while walking through the city, we drop our hands, try not to look too often at each other. the other day i went to an open mic in a basement. the headlining comedian said being lesbian isn't interesting, but i am a lesbian, if you care. as a joke, she had any lesbian raise their hand if present. i raised mine, weirdly embarrassed at being the single hand in a sea of other faces. she had everyone give me a round of applause. i felt something between pride and also throwing up.

sometimes one thing is also another thing. i keep thinking about my uncle. he died in the hospital without his husband of 35 years - they were not legally wed, so his husband could not enter. this sounds like it should be from 1950. it happened in 2007. harassment and abuse and financial hardship still follow any person who is trying to get married while disabled. marriage equality isn't really equal yet.

and i don't know that i can ever put a name to what i'm experiencing. sometimes it just feels... so odd to watch the balance. people are fundamentally uninterested in your identity, but also - like, there's a whole fucking bastion of rabid men and women who want to kill you. your friends roll their eyes you're gay we get it and that is funny but like. when you asked your father do you still love me? he just said go to your room. you haven't told your grandmother. disney is on their 390th "first" gay representation, but also cancelled owl house and censored the fuck out of gravity falls. you actively got bullied for being gay, but your advisor told you to find a different gimmick for your college essay - everyone says they're gay these days.

once while you were having a hard day you cried about the fact that the reason our story is so fucking boring to so many people is that it is so similar. that it is rare for one of us to just, like, have a good experience across the board. that our stories often have very parallel bends - the dehumanization, the trauma, the trouble with trusting again. these become rote instead of disgusting. how bad could it be if it is happening to so many people?

i kiss my girlfriend when nobody is looking. i like her jawline and how her hands splay when she's making a joke. there is nothing new about this story, sappho. i love her like opening up the sun. like folding peace between the layers of my life, a buttercream of euphoria, freckles and laughter and wonder.

my dad knows about her. i've been out to him since i was 18 - roughly four years before the supreme court would protect us. the other day he flipped down the sun visor while driving me to the eye doctor. "you need to accept that your body was made for a husband. you want to be a mother because you were made for men, not women." he wants me to date my old high school boyfriend. i gagged about it, and he shook his head. he said - "don't be so dramatic. you can get used to anything."

the other day a straight friend of mine snorted down her nose about it, accidentally echoing him - she said there are bigger problems in this world than planning a wedding.

[hannieween]

reverie | city lights series | h.js

Joshua Hong was many things aside from your hot neighbour—he was a menace, a relentless tease. But most importantly, he was the first guy to ever make you feel wanted. And you were yet to know how dangerous that was.

✮ pairings: joshua hong x female reader ✮ genre: smut (18+) ✮ word count: 16.2k ✮ aus: rock singer joshua, neighbors with benefits

› part i — link to my other fics

›🎧: best lover - bibi | thirsty - taemin | crazy like you - chungha, bibi | poison - nct dream ♡︎

› smut tags under the cut

✮ warnings: alcohol use, dubcon: reader is drunk and joshua helps her change to pjs, smut with plot, big dick Joshua, dom Joshua, dirty talk, foul language, praise kink, somewhat inexperienced reader, multiple sex scenes, fingering (f. receiver), oral sex (f, m) guided blowjob, cum swallowing, protected sex, squirting, brat taming: bondage, orgasm control (f), use of toys and overstimulation (f), dumbification, multiple orgasms (f, m), pet names: baby, pretty girl, princess, sweetheart, bunny (hers)

part ii

"Zero survival instincts," Yen scoffed, "None. Out the window."

"Yen, I'm fine," you insisted. "Nothing bad happened."

She sent you an irritated look. "What if he was a serial killer?"

You rolled your eyes. "He's not, Yen. He's just my neighbor."

"Are you serious right now?" she asked. "The least you could've done was sending me a text: 'hey yen, i'm inviting my neighbour over to fuck me into the next day, don't worry, he's not going to turn me into jerky'."

You laughed at the crude language, your best friend simulating typing on an imaginary phone.

"Shhh, keep it down, Yen," you muttered when you saw people from the tables around you glance at you.

Sitting at a cozy table for two in a charming bar, the atmosphere around him was quiet, with the soft glow of candlelight. The surrounding tables were occupied by couples, either engaged in a romantic conversation or trying to start one.

In the quiet atmosphere, your table stood out as the noisy one, occupied by two women who were indulging in the warmth of alcohol and pastries.

And, truth be told, were quite drunk on red wine.

"If he killed you at least I'd have something to tell the police," she continued with another roll of her eyes.

"But he didn't kill me. We just had sex, that's it."

She looked around your table, and suddenly you could sense that she was really invested. "How was it, then?"

You felt a sudden twinge in the apex of your thighs from just the memory of your last.

"It was so good," you sighed, and leaned on the table. "It was really really good, Yen. The best I had in my life, I think. Yeah, definitely."

"Wow, damn," she muttered, a sly grin appearing on her round face. "Not gonna lie. I'm jealous."

You chuckled. "I'm actually kind of surprised that he accepted, though," your brow furrowed, feeling your cheeks grow hotter in the mixture of being drunk and flustered at the memory. "He is so hot, Yen. Like really, really hot."

"Okay, okay. I believe you," she scoffed. "You know, when I told you to commit to writing sex scenes, I didn't mean to go methodical," she gave you a look and then smiled slyly again.

"What, I felt like I needed to experience the real thing before writing pages about it," you shrugged.

"That's a lame excuse," she said as she swirled her wine glass in the air.

"I think it's working," you leaned your cheek against your palm, your elbow propped up on the table.

"Oh, oh. Can I read the product of your little adventure?" her eyes widened.

"God, no," you recoiled at the thought. "This is just for... inspiration. There's still a lot of things I want to try before finishing the manuscript."

"What—wait a minute," she held up her hand. "Are you going to keep seeing him?"

You blinked. "Yeah, I didn't tell you?" your brow furrowed.

"Do you mean to tell me that you'll be fucking your neighbour until you finish the manuscript?!"

"Yen, it's fine," you shushed. "It's just sex. There's nothing to worry about."

Nothing to worry about. Except there was hardly anything that could take your mind off the memory.

As you walked to the interior of your building after being dropped off by Yen, all you could keep thinking was to knock on his door. Just go, knock and he'd know. That was your deal.

You have been wanting to do that all week. But you were reluctant about it because you didn't want to come across as needy.

It was now Wednesday, three nights after that night with Joshua. You had slept together, and in the following morning he left.

You stumbled out of the elevator and into the hallway, feeling so tipsy that you almost took a full minute to be certain of which of the doors led to your apartment.

The device on your door was a smart-lock that simply functioned as a key. You didn't bring your keys, so you entered your six number combination.

The beeping noise from the smart-lock of your door indicated that you had only two more attempts left before being locked out of your apartment for the next hour.

You hummed, attempting to keep steady, but couldn't ignore the gentle sway of your body from side to side. Biting your lower lip, you struggled to concentrate, but the effects of the wine bottle were swiftly taking hold.

With a click of your tongue, you stepped back to double check you were standing in front of your door. You were.

"C'mon. You can do this," you hissed to yourself as you tried to enter the combination of your smart lock.

Beep beep. Wrong again.

One attempt left.

"What," you whispered to your lock again.

You tried to rest your head on your door for more stability, but when your forehead landed a loud thud resounded on the hallway.

"Ow," you winced.

Maybe you should ask for help.

No. You can do this. Is a simple stupid lock.

The sound coming from the door next to yours startled you. But you made no attempt to move your forehead from your door, expecting to see either Joshua or his roommate, the latter you haven't met yet.

But the sweet voice calling your name from the next door made you want to sink into the ground and never be seen again.

Joshua doesn't need to see you like this, you said to yourself.

"Are you okay?" Joshua asked, and you jolted to find him next to you, his eyes examining your drowsy ones.

"Um, I can't enter my combination," you mumbled as one of your hands pushed the hair from your face.

"You're drunk," he realized then, his fingers taking your chin for his eyes to survey you, a small smile appearing on his lips. "What did you have?"

Your cheeks were already flushed from the wine, but you could swear a different kind of warmth started burning beneath your skin the exact moment he touched you.

Before you could answer to his question, you take a brief look at him. Joshua wore an oversized gray plaid shirt, a black t-shirt underneath, and light gray sweatpants. A cap adorned his head, hiding his dark hair. You came to the conclusion that, whatever he was wearing, he would no doubt look hot.

Your mouth went dry. "Jus' a bottle of wine," you muttered, trying to brush off his hand but not succeeding.

"D'you have your keys?" he said as you drunkenly tried to enter your combination to no avail. His large hand swatted yours before you could enter any numbers on the pad.

"Keys," you repeated. "Don't think so."

"Let me help you before you lock yourself out," he hushed with his cute smile. "Tell me your combination."

The combination to your smart lock escaped your lips, trusting him with it completely without a second thought. He entered the combination and the lock beeped again, the small light blinking green.

"There you go," he muttered.

"Thank you," you whispered, pushing your door open and turning around to see his face one last time before going to bed.

You opened your mouth, feeling a strange tickling under your skin as you faced him.

"I uh..."

When no other words came out, Joshua smiled softly with a sigh and entered your apartment with you.

"Come on, princess. I'll take you to bed," he muttered and closed the door behind him, taking your hand gently and pulling you to the interior of your apartment.

"Mmkay," you cooed, letting him drag you to your bedroom.

In the darkness of your apartment, you saw him dressed in a way that was atypical of his usual style, almost as if he had thrown on whatever he found first–

"You look cute with a cap," you blurted before you could even stop yourself.

"You think so, princess?" he replied and took his cap off to put it on your head. "You look cute too."

A giggle bubbled up in your chest. "Caps make m'ears look bigger," you slurred.

As you entered your bedroom, you removed the cap from your head and, at the same time, stumbled upon a pile of forgotten clothes scattered on the floor. You vaguely remembered throwing them aside while you were looking for something to wear for tonight.

"Careful," he mumbled, catching you before you hit the ground. "You're tripping with those big ears of yours, bunny."

You burst into high-pitched laughter, which resembled a kid's. As if you had just heard the funniest joke. Joshua smiled as he heard you, an endearing expression on his face.

It made you feel fuzzy inside.

"Why did you drink tonight? What was the occasion, I mean," he asked as he helped you sit on your bed.

He crouched before you and started removing your shoes. Every action was carefully done, nothing was rushed, everything was carried out with delicacy.

"I went out with my best friend to this really fancy bar," you told him with an air of contentment.

"What's your friend's name?" he asked almost a second later.

Then, in the back of your mind where you still had some lucidity, you gathered that he was trying to keep you fully awake as he helped you climb your high bed.

"Yen, Yena," you mumbled.

With a sudden movement, your body fell back against the soft mattress and you gasped. Your head spun rapidly and the rush that ran through your body caused you to giggle.

"Careful there," he cautioned, just as he was taking your socks off. You could also hear him laughing a bit.

"Are you laughing at me?" you whined, your hands instinctively covering your warm cheeks as giggles continued to escape.

"I would never, princess. You're cute when you're drunk," he replied simply.

"Mmm, you don't think I'm ridiculous?" your voice was muffled by the hands burying your face.

"Why would I think that?" you heard him ask.

"Dunno," you mumbled sheepishly. "'m really drunk, J'shua," you slurred.

"I know, bunny," he chuckled. "Where are your pjs?"

You slowly uncovered your face to see him standing before your bed.

"Second drawer," you replied pointing to the drawers next to your bed, feeling your cheeks blaze.

There was no real reason to feel this shy, considering that Joshua had already seen every inch of your naked body. But the idea of him taking care of you took on new meaning in your mind. It made you feel closer to him.

"Oooh, what do we have here?" he said with a cheeky grin.

Then he pulled a pink lace thong, holding it up in the air with his fingers.

"Joshua!" you gasped. "That's not the second drawer!"

He giggled playfully. "Oops, my bad," he said, but continued rummaging on your stuff, pulling out a see-through mesh red bra. "This is really nice, bunny. Will you wear it next time for me?"

You groaned helplessly, but before you could come up with a quippy response, his eyes widened in surprise.

"Princess, you didn't tell me you had toys," he said with a surprised tone, dropping the playful act.

"Stop," you whined with a laugh and turned to crawl across your large bed toward him.

Before you could even make it to the other side of your bed, you stumbled and your face collided with the mattress, making you erupt into uncontrollable laughter.

You heard his genuine laugh resonate through the room, causing a flutter in your stomach, followed by the muffled noise of the drawer shutting close.

"Alright, alright. Time for bed," he announced, and a hand gently flipped you on the mattress. He sat on the edge of the bed next to your body. "I'm going to take your top off, okay?"

You nodded a little too eagerly, and that made him smile with a shake of his head.

"Now don't get any ideas, sweetheart," he said.

Then his hands grabbed the hem of the cute top you wore to your date with your best friend.

As the top came off and you were left under his gaze, you felt as if your whole skin was on fire, every inch tingling with an overwhelming sensation.

But he remained silent. You tried to make out the expression on Joshua's face, while he was deeply focused on his task, giving no signals that he wanted to do more with your body.

"Bra on or off?" he asked softly.

"Off," you whispered, feeling a sudden impatience take over your mind and body despite the effects from the wine still strumming on your ears.

"Kay," he replied in the same tone. "Arch your–"

You instantly arched your back for him before he could even finish the sentence. His eyes examined your face again with a hint of curiosity. 

"I'm starting to think you're enjoying this, princess," he said with a cheeky smile.

When a hand slid behind your back, it was then that you realized he was keeping his touch on your skin at a minimum. Joshua unclasped the pretty bra you wore, his fingers removing the straps from your shoulders without touching your skin.

Something sparked in you when his gaze wandered over your naked skin. Darkened eyes marveled at your tits as your nipples hardened from the bite of cool air and the skin around them bumped helplessly.

A small silent whine bubbled in your chest, your whole body tingling, needing to be sated by his touch. You gulped hard. He noticed.

"Do you want me to continue?" he asked with a gentle tone, so low you barely heard it above the buzzing in your eardrums.

"Yes," you whispered eagerly, looking at his eyes. "I trust you, Joshua."

At that, Joshua stopped and contemplated you. The momentary silence made you wonder if you had said something wrong, and you waited for his response.

But he just booped the tip of your nose.

"Sit up," he commanded with his sweet voice.

He extended his hands out to you to help you reincorporate in your bed so that he could put the top of your pyjamas on your body.

When you lay back on the soft covers of your bed, a sigh came out of you, revealing all the emotions that were bubbling up in your chest.

But Joshua interpreted it differently.

"Don't fall asleep yet. I need you awake for this," he urged with his sweet voice.

For a moment you thought that maybe you looked way too drunk. Perhaps, you felt better than you looked: the sluggishness of your limbs with every movement you made, the heavy eyelids, the clumsy tingling in your cheeks and mouth every time you spoke: all symptoms caused by the wine.

"I'm not sleeping," you said as you blinked slowly.

"Good girl," he muttered.

But the rest of your body was ablaze, desperate for his touch. You inhaled deeply, trying to fill your chest with something other than the desperate need for him.

The room was spinning. Was it spinning a minute ago? Who knows.

"I feel dizzy," you mumbled in a whiny tone.

"Hang on, princess. I'm almost done, okay?" he instructed. Still, you could hear that warmth in his voice. 

With careful fingers, he undid the zipper and button of your pants. You lifted your hips from the bed for him to slide them down your legs effortlessly.

Joshua was piling your clothes carefully on the foot of the bed, you noticed. He folded your pants in half and when he turned to you, he surveyed the lower half of your body, partially naked before him.

His darkened eyes found yours, an unspoken question written in them.

"Off," you whispered before he could ask.

A heavy sigh left him.

"Eyes on me, baby," he instructed again.

Then he removed your white lace thong, with so much care that his fingers didn't even graze your skin. He didn't skip a beat when he was already grabbing the matching bottoms of your bunny pyjamas, sliding them up your legs.

You smiled contently and made a move to sit up on the bed. "Need to wash," you muttered suddenly.

He smiled at the clumsiness to which you lowered yourself to the floor. "C'mon," he extended his hands to you and when you stood, you stumbled backwards a bit.

With his strong hands he helped you get to the bathroom without staggering and stood outside the door in case you needed help with anything, but still giving you the privacy to tend to your needs.

Afterwards, Joshua helped you to get under the sheets and covers of the bed, tucking you in, and then he bent down and placed a sweet kiss on your forehead.

"Such a gentleman," you cooed with a weak smile.

"Here to help," he replied with a pressed smile. "Sleep now, princess. I'll see you tomorrow, m'kay?"

You reached for his hand before he could distance himself any further, stopping him in his tracks.

"Don't go," you mumbled.

He sat back down slowly and placed his hand on your tummy, the mere weight of his hand and the warmth seeping through the fabric of your pyjamas made you repress a whine.

"Sleep with me?" you slurred, clenching the hand that was still clasped by yours.

"You're drunk, sweetheart. I'll come by tomorrow," he said and patted your tummy softly.

"Please? I promise I won't try anything," you mumbled.

You felt your eyes involuntarily welling up a little. You knew it was partly due to the effects of alcohol, yet you also suspected it was because of the emotions you'd been accumulating over the past couple of days.

Looking conflicted, a small guttural groan escaped him.

"Fine," he groaned in defeat.

A smile of victory crept up your face as you did what he asked. He stood from your bed to remove his shoes and the grey shirt he was wearing. You watched him carefully place his stuff on the armchair in the corner of your bedroom.

He lay down beside you under the sheets, approaching you cautiously.

"How do you feel?" he mumbled.

"Better," you sighed softly.

"Still dizzy?" he asked, his eyes hopeful.

"Mm nope," you mumbled, 

Eyeing him shyly, you scooted toward his body and nuzzled softly on the side of his shoulder, feeling his warmth.

"Thank you for taking care of me, Joshua," you said as the scent of his cologne invaded your already overwhelmed senses.

An arm slid beneath your body, pulling you closer to his chest.

"Don't mention it," he replied.

"I didn't ruin any plans, right?" your head snapped back to look at him.

His fingers trailed on the side of your arm, causing goosebumps on your skin at their wake.

"Not really, no," he hummed. "I was thinking about you, actually."

"You were?" you asked in an embarrassingly high pitch tone.

"I wanted to see you, princess," he cooed, moving his head on the pillows to look you in the eye.

A flutter in your stomach took your focus away. Joshua wanted to see you. The way he made it sound was almost as if he missed you.

"Was thinking of knocking on your door."

Oh.

That had an entirely different meaning. Knocking on your door would mean that he wanted to have sex with you.

"You..." you mumbled awkwardly. "D'you still want to?"

Something shifted in your brain. He might have just missed your body, but it was still enough to rouse something within you. The alcohol offered little help, but instead intensified your body's every reaction.

The tingling in your face, the rush of warmth that washed through you, pooling between your legs.

"Definitely not, princess," he laughed softly, putting your ideas to rest. "I won't touch you like this," he finalized sternly.

You let out a whine that sounded more like a childish cry, burying your face in his chest and sighing in frustration.

"It's bad manners to have sex with people who are not sober, baby," he explained, his tone was not condescending, but almost sweet or caring.

"But what if I want to, Joshua," you mumbled, your flushed face still buried in the warmth of his hard chest.

"I'm not going to fuck you no matter how much you beg," he said with a small chuckle.

"But I wan' you to," you whined against his chest.

You were so close to his chest that you felt the strumming of his heart, heard the small sigh leave his body. Your fist scrunched up on his t-shirt.

"You told me you wouldn't try anything, princess," he reminded you sternly.

Joshua took the hand that has balled into a fist, grabbing on his shirt and laced his fingers with yours in an attempt to soothe you.

"Mm, it's jus'—I need you," you mumbled, sneaking a glance in his eyes.

"I'm here, bunny," he muttered softly.

"But I've been wanting to see you all week," you said with a sigh.

Your face grew hotter on your drunken confessions, but you forced yourself to make eye contact with him despite the daze from the wine.

"Why didn't you tell me?" he asked while the hand that grabbed yours played with your fingers.

"I didn't want you to think I'm needy," you mumbled sheepishly, still trying to hold eye contact, but your eyes were shifty. 

"What?" he asked with a feigned tone of surprise. "I thought we had already established the other night that you're needy. Like, really needy," he laughed.

You scoffed and hid your flushed face on his hard chest again, but he pulled back, his fingers on your chin forcing you to face him.

"I'm only joking, princess," he smiled reassuringly. "Whenever you want to you can let me know."

You opened your mouth but before you could protest, he added:

"As long as you're sober."

You let out a bashful sniffle and pouted.

"Tell you what: if you go to sleep now, I'll give you whatever you want tomorrow. How about that?" he asked, looking down to find your eyes, he let go of your hand and stroked the side of your face softly.

Your eyelids fluttered under his touch. "Whatever I want?" you asked, looking at his rosy lips and then his eyes.

"That's right, baby. Whatever you want," he conceded.

"Mmkay," you mumbled.

You relaxed in his embrace, letting go of your demands at that very moment.

"Good girl," he muttered, pressing his lips on your forehead for a long second before resting his head on the pillow next to yours.

Your cheeks flushed and a fluttering sensation invaded your chest.

"G'night, Joshua," you mumbled a second before you closed your eyes and fell asleep.

The following morning, you woke up to a headache drilling in the back of your head.

You groaned in pain, ears ringing as you opened your eyes to only wince in pain at the faint morning light filtering through the parted door of your otherwise blackout dark bedroom.

Still drowsy you looked to the other side of your bed to find Joshua asleep.

Your breath hitched at the sudden invasion of memories—you had partially forgotten that Joshua had spent the night in your bed with you again.

He was lying on his side, an arm extended to your direction. You had the faint memory of him hugging you close to his frame, so perhaps you fell out of his embrace during the night. 

Joshua's features looked relaxed, peaceful even. His flush lips pursed softly as he swallowed and nuzzled the pillow. The way he looked so cute and innocent made you smile a little. 

With every movement you took, your body protested in pain. But you hurried yourself to the bathroom, taking the time to properly wash and refresh yourself to recover from your hangover.

Under the warm stream of the shower, you mentally retraced the events of the night. The drunken confessions that spilled from your mouth. Joshua's careful hands changing your clothes and helping you to bed.

"How are you feeling?" he asked as soon as he saw you come back to your bedroom, your body wrapped in a bath towel.

He was still lying on his side, but something told you that he woke up the second he heard you leave the bedroom.

"I just have a light headache but I'll be fine," you assured him.

His hand, which was still extended in the same way as when you left, patted the space you occupied during the night.

"Come here," he muttered.

With a sigh that denoted your nervousness, you walked toward your bed and climbed next to him over the covers. You lay on your side, facing him, propping your head on your hand, your elbow on the pillow next to his.

"D'you remember what happened last night? Why I'm here?" he asked, his voice still groggy, but it sounded soft.

"It's not like I was black out drunk," you smiled. "I remember everything, Joshua."

"Jus' wanted to make sure," he whispered.

With a small nod of his head, his eyelids closed slowly and he seemed to dozed off again. His chest rising and falling heavily, his face relaxing to his lips parting a little.

You took a moment to appreciate his beauty before jumping down from your bed, darting your eyes toward the man lying on your bed—to find him asleep.

Then you unwrapped the towel that covered your body. Careful not to make a sound, you busied yourself moisturizing your skin while you cast a few glances at him, making sure he was asleep.

But a few seconds later, you noticed him stir in your bedsheets, his eyelids fluttering slowly as he found you standing before your bed, wholly naked.

Your breath hitched, but curiosity sparked within you when his eyes surveyed your whole body from top to bottom.

Attempting to ignore that he kept his gaze trained on your frame, you busied yourself on looking for something to wear.

"Don't get dressed," he muttered softly when he saw you rummage through your drawers.

You darted a look at him. His sleepy eyes on you, the ghost of a smile on his lips.

"Or do, I don't care. Just come back here," he sighed sluggishly, patting the side of the bed again.

You smiled shyly and climbed back to the spot you had taken a few minutes ago. You slid beneath the bed sheets, next to his warm body.

"You talk in your sleep," he hummed.

Then his hands grabbed you by the hips, with a sharp pull his chest was now pressing on yours, his arms encircling your naked body tightly to snuggle you as if he wanted to sleep again.

It was a sweet embrace, almost too intimate. A part of you couldn't deny you liked it—being this close to Joshua. You grabbed him by the shoulders, uneasy of being fully naked in his tight embrace.

"I–uh I didn't know," you whispered, your heart strumming so hard that you could almost sense that Joshua could feel it against his chest.

Truth be told, Joshua was the first man you had ever slept with. He wasn't your first sexual partner, that much was already disclosed with him—you've had a couple of other partners in the past, but none of them were memorable to even matter.

Joshua was the first to make you feel real pleasure, the first to make you orgasm, to make you feel wanted.

And you were yet to know how dangerous that is.

"What did I say?" you asked reluctantly.

He took a breath, as if remembering and then he let out a breathy laugh. "Bunch of nothings, but you went for hours."

"Oh god," you groaned. "I'm so sorry, Joshua."

"You didn't talk that much the other night," he paused. "But maybe you were too tired the other night to even speak, right princess?"

Your stomach jolted a bit.

"Mmm-mmph. So tired," you agreed despite the growing flush in your face. "Last night's ramble wouldn't have happened if I was tired too."

"Oh, bunny. You think you're so slick. But you're so bratty," he cooed mockingly as his hands explored your bare back, his fingers sinking in the skin of your hips.

"What are you going to do about it?" you asked through a breathy mumble when his hands caused your heart to race.

"Nothing," he stated softly.

A long silence happened between you and Joshua. You almost thought that he might have dozed off yet again, but when you pulled from his embrace, he was grinning menacingly.

"But you promised–"

"I never promised anything," his brow furrowed. "When have you ever heard me say the words 'I promise'? Never."

A frustrated groan came out from you before you could stop it.

"You told me you would do anything I asked today!" you whined, feeling ashamed by his game.

"See, I never promised," he cooed again.

"But you said–"

"And I will do it, sweetheart," he cut in. "But I never specified at what time of the day I'll do it."

"Joshua!" you whined again, feeling the need to cover your flushed face.

He laughed merrily, he was enjoying this.

"I didn't bring condoms," he muttered, dropping the playful smile.

Your eyes narrowed. "You're lying."

"It's true," he put in simply. "Someone went through all of them the other night and I haven't bought more," he emphasized with a cheeky grin, he even shrugged slightly looking as if he enjoyed torturing you.

Which, he probably did.

You were a split second away to throw all away and beg him to fuck you raw. But the last thread of sanity you still preserved in your mind stopped you.

"I forgot to ask," he said suddenly. "Have you made your list?"

You stilled and looked away embarrassed. "Um, I've thought of some things."

"Like what? Maybe we could do something tonight," he replied.

In reality you haven't gotten around making a list of things you want to try in bed with him. Your mind only ends up wandering in sex fantasies of what you'd do and never actually write something down.

"I have some ideas, but I don't know yet," you mumbled sheepishly, darting a shifty glance up his eyes.

The pierced eyebrow arched up. "I'm listening."

A smile appeared on your lips. "You're taking this really seriously," you pointed.

"Of course," he frowned, pretending to be offended. "I want to help my neighbor with her book."

You rolled your eyes with a smile.

"Besides, it's not like I get to do this everyday," he paused. "Well, unless you let me," he muttered, tilting his head forward.

"What?" you asked in a gasp. "Like you don't have people throwing themselves at you at any chance they get."

"Only my pretty neighbors," he chuckled and you playfully slapped his shoulder.

"Seriously, Joshua. You don't get a lot of groupies or whatever?"

He scoffed loudly. "Groupies. What are you, a sixty year old lady in disguise?"

"You know what I mean," you mumbled, starting to feel deeply embarrassed.

"Not really, princess. It's not what you think. I can show you if you want. Tonight," he suggested in a low tone.

The features of his face had hardened, denoting that he was more serious now.

"Tonight?"

"Only if you want to, of course," he shrugged, and you could tell from his tone, the lack of warmth and playfulness that he seemed to be detached.

"I'd love to," you replied and his face relaxed. Was he expecting you to say no?

"Kay," his lips pressed in a smile. "I'll come later to pick you up. And after that we can get into your list, deal?"

"Deal," you smiled shyly, not wanting to express the full excitedness you felt.

You noticed that every time he smiled contently, two dimples appeared crowning his mouth. Joshua sighed and then he cupped your chin with his hand, surveying your face for a moment.

"How's your head, still hurting?" he asked, his other arm still pulling you close to his frame.

"A bit. I'm fine, Joshua. Don't worry," you gave him a small reassuring smile.

"Kay," he whispered and pressed his lips on your forehead just like he did before you fell asleep in his arms.

You felt his lips relax on your forehead but he didn't pull away, his other hand returned to its original place on your waist. You assumed that he was dozing off again, and your suspicions turned correct when his breathing gained more depth.

Then you let yourself be absorbed in his embrace and your hands moved from his shoulders to his hard chest over his t-shirt. You felt the soft thumping of his heart, the slow rhythm of his breathing.

Your eyes darted to his face. He was asleep.

The hem of his shirt hung loose over his collarbones, you felt his soft and warm skin under your fingertips, lost in thought of him. Drinking the sweet scent of his skin and clothes.

Your fingers then wandered from his collarbones to his neck, his Adam's apple bobbed as the pads of your fingers touched it carefully.

But then a larger hand seized yours, pulling your arm above your head as his body pushed your body flat on the bed with a groan. The other hand was seized as well, thus pinning your wrists above your head.

A yelp bubbled in your chest, but when you felt his hard body pressing yours against the bed your curious eyes glanced up to see his face.

But before you could say something, your mouth was clasped with his with a chaste kiss.

"You're handsy," he muttered gruffly on your lips.

The grip on your wrists tightened a bit when Joshua dipped his head on the crook of your neck where he pressed his lips on your skin, to then nibble at your skin with his teeth.

"I wanted to wait 'til tonight but you're so needy. Such an impatient pretty girl," he grunted as his hand grabbed your wrists pressed down on the pillows, making you yelp and squirm.

Being somewhat restrained made you feel restless, but you made no attempt to break free, since you were quickly subdued by the feeling of his breath on the crook of your neck.

"'m sorry," you mumbled just as he started placing wet kisses on your collarbone, making his way to your tits.

"Are you, baby?" he asked, and your eyes fell on his. His pierced eyebrow cocked slightly. "I don't think you're sorry at all."

He let go of your wrists just so he could cup your breasts with his hands and before you could muster a response, he wrapped his mouth on one of your nipples, making you cry out instead.

The feeling of having his hot mouth around your nipple made you shiver, the whole area covered by his tongue and drool felt tingling and ablaze.

Hearing the non-verbal response you made, he moved his mouth to do the same with your other hardened nipple, licking and nibbling at it softly with his teeth. He hummed while doing so, as if he liked the taste of your skin on his mouth.

Your hands quickly grabbed at whatever was nearest, fingers landing on his head as you squirmed and moaned helplessly on your bedsheets. 

He pressed his lips down your sternum and he lowered himself to your belly, his hands parting your legs so he could place his body between them and continue kissing and licking your skin.

"Please-" you whispered as you writhe in pleasure under the touch of his lips.

"Please, what?" he asked as he raised his head to look at you. "What do you want, princess?"

"Do whatever you want, just-" you gulped suddenly. "I need you, Joshua. I've waited all week."

His eyes searched yours, just like he did last night when you were drunk.

"Please," you whispered and that apparently did it for him.

He lowered himself pressing wet kisses on your lower abdomen as his mouth reached between your legs, his eyes darted a look toward yours before his fingers parted your pussy lips carefully, earning a high keen moan from you.

"Fuck. You're dripping," he muttered gruffly as his finger swiped a line on your cunt, making you flinch and moan pathetically. "Practically wetting the bed."

Then his tongue dipped between your parted lips, slowly licking a stripe on your wet folds. You let out a loud moan, grabbing a handful of black hair, making him hum softly when you tugged at it.

Joshua wasn't looking for you to say something, because he quickly continued making out with your clit. You were practically crying out of pleasure when you felt his mouth working on the swollen bud, tugging at it with his lips every time he closed his mouth around it.

You felt your legs shake a bit under the building tension but you didn't budge. A faint voice inside you reminded you to relax, to focus on his mouth kissing your cunt, his tongue swirling around your clit and trailing down to drink you in with a moan.

His hands slid underneath your body and cupped your ass, pushing you up to his face, essentially burying his face between your legs. Joshua's mouth flatly pressed on your cunt as if he were thirsty, ravaging you and humming as he did it.

Then his tongue pressed on your clit, his lips encircling it whole as his cheeks hollowed out, sucking on the throbbing bud. You arched your back, crying out loudly at the feeling of being so close to your release.

"I'm close, so close, Joshua," you whimpered, eliciting a groan from him.

You looked down where his head was nuzzled between your legs and the sight was so fucking good that something in your brain shifted. His dark eyes found yours, and you completely came undone.

The tension in your body snapped, sending waves of pleasure, making your limbs grow numb. You called out his name weakly, your eyes screwing shut at the mercy of the waves seizing your body, making you twitch and gasp in short breaths.

Joshua was moaning just from making you cum. And that could probably send you to the edge again if it wasn't for the new feeling of one of his fingers inside you.

You blinked, feeling dazed and you found Joshua on his knees, his finger plunging in and out of your sopping walls, massaging them gently.

"You liked that, baby?" he asked at the same time he slipped another finger in.

"Yeah," you whimpered. "I've been wanting this for days."

His pierced eyebrow arched up.  "This would have happened sooner if you knocked on my door," he smiled fondly. "But I like that about you—too shy to go knock on my door, but not to ask me to fuck you senseless."

You whined at the same moment his fingers crooked inside you, exploring, looking for your g-spot with the tips of his fingers.

"You like it when I talk to you, right? Your pussy squeezes my fingers whenever I do," he mentioned with a grin.

As if to prove his point, your walls fluttered around his fingers and he chuckled.

"Oh, princess. You're perfect," he muttered gruffly, leaning his body to plant a chaste kiss on your lips.

"God, Joshua," you whimpered, the tension between your legs building up again.

"You wanna cum again, baby?" he asked, grazing your lower lip with his teeth before kissing you chastely.

"Yes. So bad," you groaned, wiggling your hips to get more from his fingers.

"Can you cum on my fingers? Or do you want my mouth too?" he asked, his fingers teasing your cunt, making you feel the drag of his knuckles inside you as he pulled his fingers out and in, making squelching sounds every time he moved his hand inside you.

"Yes, please! I want your mouth too," you whimpered desperately.

His smile was the last thing you saw before he lowered himself between your legs and immediately attached his mouth to your clit. Joshua continued fucking you with his fingers, crooking them to find your g-spot.

"Joshua!" you cried out, your body twitching uncontrollably in your bed. "I'm gonna come, I'm ah-"

Now with his mouth and fingers, the pleasure in your pussy was so much more intense, practically tearing your orgasm out of you as you cried out.

Ragged breaths came out from your mouth, blinking tears weakly as your orgasm sizzled under your skin. Joshua's fingers stopped when he felt your walls relax and slipped out of your sopping core, making you shudder at the emptiness.

Then you were being showered with kisses on your face. You laughed meekly as his lips pressed on yours.

"You're being spoiled, princess," he teased. "Was planning on waiting to make you come until tonight but you're so greedy."

"Mm'm sorry," you muttered weakly.

"Sorry for what?" he asked.

"Dunno," you giggled.

"Are you fucked out already, bunny?" he smiled sweetly at you. "But I haven't even given you my cock yet."

You whimpered and reached for his lips, kissing him sloppily. A moan coiled in your chest when you tasted yourself on his tongue and lips.

Joshua stopped and looked at you with a pleased smile on his face, and a finger caressed your flushed cheek fondly, only to dip his head to kiss you again.

"God. You're so pretty, so fucking hard to resist," he grunted in your lips.

You whined and your hands cupped his face to slot your lips in his. "Please don't," you whispered, your lips grazing with his. "I want more, Joshua. I want you."

His eyes lingered on yours and you could almost see when it clicked in his mind.

"You want me to fuck you raw," he asked with a low tone.

A shiver ran down your spine when you heard his words.

You nodded, biting your lip so Joshua wouldn't notice that you were practically salivating at the thought.

The corner of his lips twitched. "You already came twice."

"But I want you, Joshua. I want to feel you inside me," you whispered, still writhing from your high.

The glint in his darkened eyes made you think that he enjoyed this. Whatever this was: your sanity slipping away at the mercy of Joshua pleasuring you, doing everything you needed from him.

"I can't fuck you raw, bunny," he muttered, pressing his lips sweetly on yours as you whined in his mouth. "It's too dangerous."

You understood that you were clawing at a limit of his, so you backed down. "Okay," you whispered.

"Good girl," he said as his lips captured yours in a heated kiss.

He slumped his body next to you on your bedsheets, resting his head on his hand as the other started caressing your skin affectionately.

"Joshua?" you called. 

"Mm?" he hummed as he appeared to be deep in thought, tracing invisible circles around your belly button.

"Can I-" you sighed when the tip of his pointer finger traced back to one of your nipples.

"Yes?" he asked, smiling when your nipple hardened and then he did the same with your other nipple.

"Can I touch you?" you whispered.

"You don't have to ask," he muttered with a small smile.

The pleased smile that spread on your lips made him chuckle.

You eagerly grabbed the hem of his t-shirt and Joshua understood immediately, sitting up on the bed and took his t-shirt off in one swift motion.

You sat up on your bed sheets—thus realizing that Joshua wasn't exaggerating when he said you were wetting the bed. You ignored the wet stain on your sheets and hooked the waistband of his sweatpants on your fingers.

"Do you want me naked, sweetheart?" he asked, noticing your struggle to undress him.

"Yeah," you breathed, looking at him expectantly.

He climbed down the bed to pull down the sweatpants, he did it efficiently, without making it a show for you but he still looked really attractive while doing so; his strong thighs stepping out of his sweat pants to reveal his hardened length still inside his underwear.

Suddenly you had other plans. You followed him, standing in front of him as he tilted his head to the side. Your fingers tugged at the band of his black underwear, taking it off of him to reveal his fully hard cock.

Then you lowered yourself to your knees.

"I wanna suck you off," you explained shyly, feeling your core pulsate to the mere act of you being on your knees for him.

His fingers grazed your chin. "Have you done this before?" he asked with a low tone.

You shook your head silently, eyeing him and his cock in front of you. Your hands caressed his strong thighs, trailing up to his hips. You realized then that you didn't touch him like this the other night.

One of your hands grabbed his cock at the base, stroking the soft skin of the length to his wet reddened cockhead. It was large and thick, and it leaned to the side a bit. You rubbed your thumb on the slit, feeling his precum leak on the pad of your thumb.

You glanced up at his dark eyes as you took the wet thumb to your mouth, licking his precum.

His breath hitched noticeably.

"I'll tell you what to do," he nodded, then he cupped your cheek, a serious look on his face. "You can stop if you don't like any of it, m'kay?" he muttered.

You wet your lips and nodded. "Okay," you whispered.

"Open your mouth," he instructed gently. You parted your lips and took the bulbous head of his cock and hesitantly placed it in your tongue.

His cock was too big for you to take him deeper, but you experimentally, and almost instinctively, relaxed your tongue under the weight of his heavy cock, wrapping your mouth around the half of the length.

"Breathe through your nose and move your head forward," he muttered and you did so, pushing your mouth on the length of his cock.

"Then back. You don't have to take me all," he instructed, his hands pushing your hair back from your face, caressing your face with his thumbs in the process. 

Whatever he instructed, you carried out without a second thought.

"Good girl," he whispered. 

Hearing him like this only pushed you to focus, despite the throbbing ache between your legs demanding for equal attention.

You discovered then that you liked the act of you taking his cock in your mouth on your knees for him. The walls of your core fluttered and you knew you were getting wetter as you started bobbing your head back and forth just like he instructed.

"That's it, baby. Just glide your pretty mouth on my cock. Fuck, it feels so good, so fucking good," he groaned.

Slurping sounds came from your lips around his thick cock as you picked up your pace. You darted a look up.

When your eyes met, the corner of his mouth curved up. "You look so good with my cock stuffed in your pretty mouth like this," he muttered, his thumb caressing your cheek.

A whimper coiled in your throat that otherwise would have escaped your lips if his cock wasn't stuffed so deep in your mouth. His cockhead was almost gagging you, hitting the back of your mouth every time you tried to push him further.

Drool trailed from the corners of your mouth. You wiped a side with the back of your hand but Joshua quickly stopped you in the middle of it.

"Don't. I like the way it looks," he mumbled, taking your hand to grab at his thigh again.

That made you take mental notes of everything he liked, every reaction you earned you kept in the back of your head. You wanted to pleasure him as best as you could, you made it your goal to earn more pretty sounds and moans.

He shuddered. "Fuuuuck," he groaned faintly again, his voice raspy and guttural.

You glanced up back at him, an idea popping in your head—you liked it when he sucked on your clit, so maybe he would like it if you suck on him too. Your cheeks hollowed, sucking him as you pulled your head back and then pushing your head forward, taking on more of his cock in with each bob of your head.

His head was thrown back, so you couldn't see much of his face. But his throat bobbed when he swallowed and you hollowed out your cheeks for him to moan deliciously. 

"Fuck—shit," he hissed. "If you keep doing that I'll cum in your mouth," he groaned and his hands tightened on your scalp, attempting to pull out.

But you dug your fingers on his thigh, pulling him back as you did it again, bobbing your head faster and hollowing your cheeks harder.

"Is that what you want, baby?" he asked, a large hand cupping the side of your face, thumb tapping you gently to make you look up at him.

You saw the muscles of his jaw twitch when all you did as a response was blink at him twice, nodding your head ever so slightly without detaching your mouth from his throbbing cock.

"Taking my cum the first time you give head—fuck, you're so, so perfect," he sighed weakly.

His fingers clenched on your hair and you knew he was really close because he was breathing out heavily, broken groans. 

"I'll tell you when it happens. Remember to breathe through your nose," he reminded you gently.

You continued moving your head forward, so far that the tip of your nose almost felt his pubic hair, his cockhead bumping the back of your throat, making it hurt a bit. And then sucking on the length moving your head back, breathing in deeply.

Your eyes darted upwards, finding Joshua's face riddled in lust. He groaned, furrowing his brow a bit as his eyelids were fluttering shut and his mouth parted a bit.

"Cumming," he breathed. 

Then he started making the most raw sounds you've heard him utter yet. His moans sounded sweet and raspy, almost as if he were about to start whimpering; all music to your ears. The hand on your hair clenched, hard. Joshua shuddered and with a louder groan his cum was shooting in the back of your mouth.

You moaned with him and stopped moving your head to breathe through your nose, swallowing quickly as ropes of cum filled your throat. It was slightly salty, warm and it was so much of it.

A fiery rush ran down your spine. You enjoyed giving him head and having him cum in your mouth. You loved the reaction he had, the lewd sounds he made, because of you.  

He was breathing heavily—not the way he did when he fucked you into your bed the other night, that was out of exhaustion. This was different, he was heaving, looking like he was elated.

"That was amazing," he sighed heavily once again.

A shudder shook him hard when you sucked on his cock again before pulling it out from your mouth.

"Woah, don't do that," he giggled softly. "Tickles."

You smiled sweetly. "Was it good?"

He bent down to help you up, cupping your face in his large hands to pull you into a heated kiss, you moaned in his mouth as his tongue lapped on yours, probably tasting himself on your tongue.

"The best fucking head I've ever had," he muttered gruffly on your lips.

You laughed.

"I mean it," he nodded, pressing his forehead on yours.

Then Joshua bent down a little and lifted your body up, eliciting a small yelp from you. You quickly grabbed him by the shoulders, wrapping your legs around him.

He gently placed you on your bed and pressed his lips against yours.

"You did really well, baby," he muttered before capturing your lips with his, kissing you softly.

A strange feeling of fulfillment swelled in your chest.

Joshua leaned his head against your chest, seemingly still coming down from his high because when he lifted his head ever so slightly to meet your eyes, he smiled lazily at you.

You returned the smile. Your hand found the nape of his neck and started drawing invisible figures on his bare back. A sigh coming from his lips brushed your skin, making you shiver.

You could get used to this, you said to yourself.

"I have to go now," he muttered, pushing himself from your body. "But I'll come pick you up later, m'kay?"

"What should I wear?" you asked, suddenly feeling nervous at the prospect of going out with him.

"Whatever you want, bunny," he smiled. "You look good in anything... and with nothing at all, too."

A fluttering sensation invaded your chest. You laughed. "Ditto."

He laughed, bringing a hand up to push his dark hair back anxiously. Was he flustered?

He planted a kiss on your lips and stood up from your bed, dressing up quickly. Again, he didn't make a show of it, but you enjoyed watching him nonetheless.

When he noticed your lustful gaze practically eye-fucking him, he smiled. "Insatiable little thing," he muttered, bending down to give you one final chaste kiss. "I'll see you later, sweetheart."

When Joshua came around to knock on your door, it was eight o'clock.

His black hair was parted naturally in the middle and it looked slightly wet. He wore a white faux leather jacket, white t-shirt and black denim jeans and black boots.

"I'm not ready yet," you told him as soon as he crossed your apartment door.

"I can see that," he smiled, looking at you up and down, noticing the silk robe you were wearing.

"Shut up," you quipped.

Rushing back to your room, you quickly got dressed in the outfit you had decided to wear for the occasion, inferring from the style that you usually saw Joshua dressed in for his gigs. 

Facing the mirror, you thought it was a cute outfit, but nothing prepared you for what Joshua's reaction would be.

As soon as you stepped in front of him, his mouth parted slightly, but was quickly replaced by a smile. He took a step to you, grabbing your hand to pull it up and you understood that he wanted you to twirl for him.

"You're gorgeous," he muttered before grabbing your face with one hand to pull you in a hot kiss.

"Thank you," you smiled sheepishly.

"I brought you something," he muttered in between kisses.

"Oh?" you uttered, being showered by his warm lips.

"But you have to open it when we get back. I just wanted to leave it here before we go," he handed a small black box.

It didn't look like a present, it wasn't wrapped or adorned with anything. You wanted to open it as soon as you took it. It was big enough to cover both of the palms of your hands, and it was somewhat heavy for its size, too.

"What is it?" you asked, looking up to his big eyes.

"It's for later," he replied, you noticed a glint in his eyes.

"Oh," you uttered again, smiling. "What's the reason?"

"Consider it one of the many I plan to give you," he smiled playfully.

You cocked an eyebrow. "Should I worry about what's inside?" you joked.

"It's something I know you'll like," he tilted his head to the side. "Or I hope it does."

Your finger slid on the edge of the black box. You got a faint idea of what was kept inside but decided to listen to Joshua and wait for later.

"Let's go, princess. The boys are waiting for us," he said, taking your hand with his.

"Who?" you asked, swiftly putting the gift on the coffee table and grabbing your purse as you headed out of your apartment.

"My bandmates. You'll like them," he assured you, turning to see you. "They've been eager to meet you."

"You told them about me?" you asked in a high pitch tone.

You got in the elevator together and Joshua pressed the button downstairs.

"I told them I'm bringing you with me and they went crazy about it," he sighed, unlocking his phone to show you a myriad of texts from a Jihoon and a Vernon.

You read the oncoming texts, raging for mostly reactions and exacerbated questions about Joshua finally dating someone. But he quickly shut down those speculations from his bandmates at once by saying you were a friend.

Something else on the screen caught your attention.

"You have seven hundred unread messages? And why do they say you're finally dating someone, what do they mean by finally?" you asked, bewilderedly returning his phone in his hand.

"You are a fast reader," he frowned. "I don't like texting," he shrugged.

"And?" you prompted.

His lips quirked into a smile. "Wouldn't you like to know," he joked, then shrugged again. "I've been single for a while."

"Really?" you asked with a smile, cocking an eyebrow.

"You're in no position to tease me about it," he smiled too.

You brushed him off. "Why are you single?"

"I uh..." he frowned and looked to the floor, as if looking for an answer there, "I haven't found the right person, I guess."

A sudden pang of concern jabbed you in the chest. But you made no comment, just nodded.

"And you?"

"Mmph. Same, I guess."

He looked at you. "Are you looking for something in particular?"

You sighed, contemplating your answer. "Nothing specific. Just… someone who feels right, you know? Someone who matches."

He nodded thoughtfully. "Yeah, I get it. Has to be the right match, or it just doesn't work."

"But it's not like I'm actively looking," you added, trying to lighten the mood.

"Yeah, me neither," he replied, trying to match your tone, but the awkwardness lingered.

Feeling the change, he cleared his throat.

The elevator doors opened and you walked outside of the building toward a large van. Where two men were waiting for Joshua, as soon as they saw you walking at his side, they exchanged a not so discreet look.

Joshua scoffed. "These two," he muttered with a grin.

Joshua opened the front door for you and you got into the passenger seat, noticing on your way that the back of the van was packed with a full drum set and two large guitar cases, a mic stand and sound amplifiers.

"This is Vernon and Jihoon," Joshua introduced you to the two grinning men who looked at you expectantly.

You told them your name with a shy smile.

"Behave," Joshua sneered as he sat in the driver's seat next to you, eyeing at the two guys sitting on the seats behind.

"We haven't said anything!" Jihoon protested with a smug grin.

You wanted to laugh at the way that Jihoon and Vernon exchanged looks once again.

"So... where did you two guys meet?" Jihoon asked either you or Joshua.

You felt like the question was directed towards you. "We're neighbors," you put in flatly. But sensing that you were being shy, added: "I complained at him for being noisy."

"Complained?" he interjected. "More like berated me," he teased as he started the car.

"I did not berate you," you bit back with a smile.

He rolled his eyes. "Put your seatbelt on."

"You first," you mumbled, but you did as he told nonetheless.

Jihoon scoffed loudly, trying not to burst out laughing.

"That's cute," Vernon commented flatly.

"What is?" you asked, turning to see the man sitting directly behind you.

He shrugged.

"It's cute that you're acting like an old married couple," Jihoon translated for his fellow bandmate with a smile.

You laughed. "Joshua is just a tease."

You felt him shift and noticed that he gave you a look.

"Oh, Shua's a nightmare," Jihoon retorted.

"Shua?" you repeated, looking at Joshua and then at Jihoon.

"He has many nicknames, you know. Joshuji, Joshu, Joshie, but the girls prefer Shua," he teased.

"Girls?" you parroted.

"Joshua's fans," Vernon informed, looking at his phone aloofly.

"Instagram fans," Jihoon complemented.

"Mmmph," you hummed.

"He's garnered quite the following," Jihoon teased, enjoying how Joshua was practically seething at him through the rear mirror.

"I imagine. But he told me he doesn't," you quipped.

"What?! He doesn't shut up about it with us," he looked over at Vernon, who just nodded with his head.   

"I can find more drummers, you know," Joshua bit back, looking at Jihoon through the rear view mirror.

"Please," the drummer scoffed.

"So you guys have been in a band for long?" you asked, feeling a certain eagerness to know more about Joshua's life.

"Two years?" Jihoon inferred, looking at Vernon, who just nodded in silence.

"I haven't listened to your music yet," you realized out loud. "I'm excited."

Joshua smiled without tearing his eyes from the road.

You arrived at a place called The Spot. Which was a bar located a few minutes from your apartment building.

Joshua parked the large van in the small parking lot behind the bar for the boys to unload the equipment they brought.

"Come. I'll show you inside," he said, grabbing your hand to lead you inside the dark-neon lit interior.

The bar was a western rock bar with an 80s theme. It had old movie posters and red neon signs on the walls. A U-shaped bar top in the center of the space, a large red neon sign that spelled 'Heartbreaker' mounted on the wall. Next to the booths and tables was a small stage where Jihoon and Vernon were already the drum set mounted.

The bar was not that big, but it was already starting to pack with people.

You sat in the last stool at the bartop, the spot was facing the side of the stage.

Keeping your eyes trained on him. He was scanning his surroundings anxiously, as if he was looking for something but nothing in particular at the same time.

"You can order whatever you want. It's on me," he smiled, and nodded at the two guys behind the bartop.

He fixed his jacket and licked his lips, then noticed your gaze on him.

"Are you nervous?" you asked suddenly.

That drew his big eyes to yours. "Nervous?"

"Yeah, you're fidgety," you pointed.

"I'm not," he said sternly, eyeing you with a glint of annoyance.

You narrowed your eyes. "You are," you insisted. "Why? Is it because I'm here?"

You laughed when all Joshua did was roll his eyes.

"I'll deal with you later," he brushed off before turning away and helping the guys get everything installed.

A pretty girl came forward almost a second later with a notepad and wearing a big smile. "Can I get you anything?" she asked.

You thought about it for a second. "Can I get a virgin piña colada?" you asked, feeling like a kid again.

The girl smiled. "Of course, right away."

Seconds later, the tall man behind the counter handed you your virgin cocktail. It had a cherry on the rim and a small pineapple slice.

"Thanks."

The tall nodded. "Are you a friend of Joshua's?" he asked.

You nodded, looking at his name tag. Mingyu.

When Mingyu smiled, you saw that his pointed fangs adorned his smile in a cute manner.

"You are his friend too?" you asked.

"He's more my boss's friend," he nodded in the direction of a tall guy that was talking with Joshua.

"Does he come here often?" you decided to pry.

"Just every other Thursday," he shrugged.

"D'you have live shows every Thursday then?"

"Yep. We try at least," he said as he poured beer on a crystal jug and put it on the bartop. "We are planning on having stand up nights, but Wonwoo says it's not a good idea," he said, pointing at his partner.

Wonwoo looked up, his ears perking at the sound of his name. "What?" he asked, pushing the rim of his frames up his sharp nose.

"Nothing," Mingyu brushed off.

"Have you thought about having Ladies’ Night?" you inquired, seeing the groups of women fill in the booths around the stage. 

"Huh. Sure, why not," he said in a thoughtful tone. And he turned to his partner. "Hey, what do you think of Ladies’ Night instead of stand up nights?"

Wonwoo shrugged, eyeing you curiously. "Either sounds like more work for me," he smiled shyly at the taller man. "Don't tell Cheol I said that."

The groups of girls coming to the bar, you thought, were due to the fact that the bar was partly cheap and well-decorated. It seemed like a fun place for a mini photo session while getting a few drinks; as you noticed from the people posing in front of the red neon signs.

A second thought was that a large part of the mostly female clientele was because the three guys who ran the bar were good looking.

Mingyu was the sweet, friendly looking guy, tall and buff; he was hot and well aware of it. Wonwoo was the alluring, quiet looking guy, dressed in all black, but whenever he smiled, his nose would wrinkle, telling on his sweet side. And the guy who was talking with Joshua also looked really attractive: tall, with the poise of a commander. Pale blond hair and full lips.

Joshua noticed you looking his way and smiled at you, making your insides jolt in response.

It was almost funny. He'd throw just a glance at you and have your body reacting like crazy.

But you guessed that it was unavoidable.

The eyes on him weren't just yours, but half of the people sitting around the small stage looked at Joshua expectantly as he nodded to his blond friend once and took the strap of his electric guitar to put it around his shoulders.

He did a brief sound check, which consisted of strumming the chords a few times aimlessly. That dragged dozens of eyes to the stage.

The microphone was tapped twice by his finger, as the speakers that played regular music died down, the microphone catching the sound around it and you could hear Joshua clearing his throat briefly.

You noticed the energy change around you, the buzz of the crowd growing quiet and then hushed almost completely when Joshua took the microphone, a white pick trapped between his pointer and middle finger.

"Hi, we're Midnight Haze," Joshua said, "and we're going to be your entertainment for tonight. Enjoy," his lips rose into a smile.

Then he turned to the drummer and nodded. Jihoon moved to get into position on the stool he occupied, lifting the drumsticks in his hands. He tapped them together twice, and with a thunderous splash, the music began reverberating throughout the place.

Then the guitar chords pierced the air and their vibrations could be felt on the barstool you were sitting at. With his eyes fixed on his guitar, Joshua raised his head to place his mouth in alignment with the microphone on the stand.

Under the red glowing light, his face lit up almost ominously as he began to sing. The sweet voice reverberated in your chest due to your closeness to the speakers, but beneath that, you felt a surge of emotion invade your senses as his voice rose with passion, weaving the melodies.

Midnight Haze sounded heavy enough like when a tidal wave crashes, but light and fun enough to dance along. Guitar solos spiral into your ears, Joshua appeared to be enjoying himself while swaying with his guitar, igniting a blaze of raw energy.

You realized that you were not the only one who was awestruck. Definitely not groupies. But there were some girls ogling at him, which, you realized, was difficult to resist.

At least from what you could catch, they had their eyes glued to the lead singer, who was putting on quite a show: dancing with his guitar, swaying his head to the music and smiling at his bandmates in some unspoken exchange.

They played for an hour non-stop, ending with an upbeat song and then he thanked the crowd and said goodbye for himself and the rest of the band. As they stepped down from the stage, the audience applauded and so did you, but you couldn't help but feel that you were left wanting more.

After some minutes, the buzz of the crowd resumed as well as the music from the bar speakers. Joshua made his way to you, sweat on his forehead and his looking a mixture of exhilarated and tired. But he was grinning ear to ear.

"See? No one is throwing themselves at me," he told you. 

"Point taken, rockstar," you rolled your eyes. 

He smiled widely, making your heart lurch. "Did you like the show?"

"Yeah. It was way too short, though. I kinda want more," you smiled up at him, still feeling dazed and a bit deafened.

"Sometimes we play on bigger venues and for longer," he commented, nodding to the small stage that was being cleared up from the band's equipment.

"I'll definitely want to see that," you stated.

His big dark eyes found yours, the corner of his mouth lifted. "I'll help the boys and I'll come back for you," he said and booped the tip of your nose before turning to the stage and helping with the dismounting of the equipment.

You quietly observed him as he busied himself to help clean up the stage. He's so cool, you internally said abashedly. He laughed and joked around with Vernon and Jihoon, drawing the attention of the people around them.

He looked at you from across the room and sneaked a wink. Did he know you'd be staring at him? He waved goodbye to his friends and turned to you.

"Ready, princess?" he asked, looking curiously at your already finished drink. "You had piña coladas?"

"Virgin piña coladas," you emphasized, nodding.

"That reminds me of something," he noted, and went to pay the bill to then return to you. "Come on."

Joshua took your hand as he led you back to the parking lot and opened the door of the van for you.

"We have to talk about some rules," he pointed as he drove back home.

"Rules?" you looked at him. Fuck, he's hot even when he's driving.

He had one hand on the steering wheel, and the other was relaxed on the windowsill.

"Last night I told you I wouldn't do anything to you while you're drunk, remember?"

"I'm not drunk now," you interjected.

"But you told me you didn't care, right?"

"And I don't. You can do whatever you want with me," you blurted, feeling your cheeks grow hotter.

"I need to know when something is completely out of the question, princess," he told you softly, eyeing you again.

"Like what?" you asked.

"Can I fuck you while you sleep?" he asked, by the tone he used, you could tell he was just giving you an example.

You smirked. "Sounds like you wouldn't do that," you retorted.

"I'm not into that," he admitted.

"That's why you couldn't last night?" you decided to pry.

"You weren't sober. Under different circumstances, I might've considered it. But last night just didn't feel right," he explained, seemingly deep in thought.

"Noted," you smiled at the careful consideration he had over you.

"I think we need to establish a safeword," he said after some seconds.

You saw him toy with his lower lip as the other hand still gripped the steering wheel.

"And I use this safe word whenever I don't like something, right?"

There was a bit you knew about the use of safewords—you were a bit inexperienced, yes. But not completely out of the loop.

"If you want me to stop, you say it and I will," he nodded, as he parked the van in the parking lot. Swiftly unbuckling his seatbelt, he hopped out of the van and then hurried over to your door.

You were both on the elevator when you told him your safeword after some careful consideration.

"Got it," he nodded again, licking his lower lip in a thoughtful expression. "Any reason why that's your safeword?"

"Wouldn't you like to know," you quipped, a playful smile spreading on your lips.

He chuckled, a mischievous glint in his eye. "You've been really bratty today, princess," he pointed.

"Oh, please," you pushed his shoulder playfully. "It's just a bit of teasing, can't you handle it, Shua? What are you going to do?"

The doors opened with a soft ding.

"Alright," he scoffed, and with a sudden movement, he bent down to throw you over his shoulder as if it was nothing.

"Joshua! Put me down!" you squealed.

You heard him laugh as he walked with you secured over his shoulder and stopped in what you guessed was your apartment.

He entered the combination to your smart-lock and pushed the door open.

"Now princess, where did you put the box I gave you?" he asked as soon as the door closed behind him.

"Coffee table," you mumbled, starting to feel dizzy.

Joshua didn't put you down as he took the box from the coffee table by crouching down slightly to reach it. Your limbs and head dangled helplessly, blood rushed to your head but as he moved to your bedroom, he set your backside on the bed, setting you down finally.

"Open it," he encouraged, and started to take off his jacket.

"I think I know what I'm gonna find here," you muttered, recovering with a sigh.

"Oh, do you?" he looked up at you while you took the lid of the box off.

The box contained two things, one of which confirmed that your suspicions were right—rope. Tightly coiled and bundled, it was black and new, by the smell of it. It was also soft, when you gently reached out a finger to touch it.

Next to the rope, a pair of fuzzy pink handcuffs.

"I got two options for you to choose for tonight," Joshua explained and you found his big eyes scrutinizing you.

Instinctively, you grabbed the rope, since it seemed more alluring to you at that moment.

Joshua smiled knowingly, taking the rope from your hands. "Alright, princess. Rope it is," he nodded.

"But I liked the handcuffs too," you blurted.

"Patience, bunny. We'll have plenty more nights," he stated, making your insides jolt with eagerness.

"M'kay," you mumbled, looking at him anxiously.

In reality, you didn't have 'plenty more nights' as he said, since your deal with him was to be fuck buddies until you finished your manuscript. Which you have been dreading to finish.

He noticed your restive eyes on him and dipped his head to slot his lips in yours, giving you a reassuring kiss.  

"Take off your clothes for me, sweetheart," he instructed gently before pressing his lips with yours.

Your breath hitched so embarrassingly you had to bite down your lower lip. You liked the way he told you what to do, you liked that he took control. So you did what he told you to do.

As your clothes came off, Joshua busied himself preparing the rope for you. But his eyes remained fixed on you as you made a show to take off your clothes for him.

He sat at the foot of the bed—watching you with a sweet smile that didn't fully show his teeth. Your heart fluttered uneasily when his gaze darkened slowly when you got to your see through the mesh red lingerie he asked you to wear.

You unclasped your bra and sheepishly moved it from your chest, throwing it to the floor to then tug at the hem of your thong. 

"Leave that on," he stopped you before you could get to the last piece of your undergarments. 

The rope came undone on his hands, it was longer than you expected. Watching his hand twist the rope in an organized fashion, using his elbow as an anchor while his other hand grasped the other end of the knot.

"You've done this before," you pointed.

"Or," he countered with a grin, "I just know how to tie rope."

You squinted, catching the obvious white lie. "How many times have you done this?" you pressed.

"I don't think you really want to hear the answer to that, princess," he quipped.

Fair.

"Mmph," you hummed.

He sighed and looked at you, almost fully naked under the dim lights of your bedroom. "Yes, sweetheart. I've done this before. Don't worry," he nodded to the bed.

You understood and climbed your bed, moving your body to the middle and lying down on your pillows. Joshua followed you on his knees before you.

He extended the rope out for you, organized in two holes for you to fit your hands inside. You anxiously stuck your hands on each hole, at the same time Joshua slid the knot, tucking it closer to your wrists.

"Is it too tight?" he asked, and you could tell he was excited already.

You shook your head, your eyes trained on Joshua as he bent to finish tying the rope on the rails of the headboard of your princess bed—thus pinning your arms above your head.

"Remember our safeword," he said softly before placing a tender kiss on your lips.

You repeated your safeword, and then you started to feel your body heat in anticipation.

"That's my good girl," he sighed, pressing his lips on yours. "You're good only when you're about to get fucked, right?"

You attempted to give him an answer but his tongue dragged on your lower lip, finding your tongue as he kissed you slowly, enjoying the taste of your lips with a soft hum.

"I'm always good," you replied meekly.

"Oh, sweetheart. If only that were true. You wouldn't be tied right now," he smirked and pulled away from your body.

Joshua jumped from the bed, and started getting rid of his clothes, except his underwear. He smiled when he noticed you looking at him and turned to open the first drawer where he knew now you kept your toys.

Your blood rushed to your cheeks, and involuntarily you moved your hands to no avail—your arms were completely restrained.

"Do you keep them charged, princess?" he asked while he rummaged through your clothes to find your toys on the bottom of the drawer, stored neatly inside a shoe box.

"Yeah," you breathed nervously.

"How often do you use them?" he asked.

"Um... last time I used them was... wh-when I had that dream about you," you stuttered.

"Did you cum, baby?" he asked, looking over to your body as he made his way back to you .

You nodded. "And while I was sleeping," you muttered sheepishly.

He cocked his pierced eyebrow. "Is that even possible?" he asked, climbing back to the bed with two of your toys.

"It was for me," you breathed.

"So you came... twice? From a little wet dream of me eating you out?" he asked, his eyes marveling at the sight of you tied to your bed.

You nodded.

He smiled, letting out a sigh. "My perfect little bunny. Who would've thought you'd be this needy," he leaned in, cupping the side of your face to press his lips on the tip of your nose, then to your lips.

The urge of touching his face too invaded you, your arms twitched, the tight knot of rope stopping you before you could even move any further.

It was almost funny—being aware of the impossibility of touching him but still aching to do so aroused you.

"Joshua... please," you gulped hard.

His laugh came as a surprise to you. "Begging already, princess?"

"I need you," you whimpered, looking at him through your eyelashes.

"But you are in no position to make demands, baby," he muttered and planted a chaste kiss on your lips which you returned eagerly, trying to sneak the tip of your tongue between his lips but he pulled back slightly with a smirk.

"But you said-"

"I know what I said," he interjected. "That was before you acted all bratty today, wasn't it, sweetheart?"

You let out a small whine and bit your lower lip.

"So maybe I won't fuck you tonight, how about that?" he asked, tilting his head to the side, his black bangs obscuring one eye.

"You wouldn't do that," you whined, writhing on your bed, the restraints stopping you before you could do anything at all.

"Careful there, princess. These might be soft but I bet you bruise easily, don't you?" he asked, tugging at the knot pinning your wrists.

"Joshua!" you squeaked.

"Yes?" he met your eyes, giving you an innocent look.

It was insane how controlled he looked, the way he looked at you as if you were his prey and he were just toying with you.

You fumbled for the words, but as his eyes bored into yours, you felt at a loss.

"Joshua, please," you whispered when his lips found your sweet spot between your ear and jawline, making you moan when his lips sucked softly.

"Keep begging all you want, baby," he muttered, and you just knew he was smiling.

His hands trailed down your body, roaming, caressing your breasts and playing with your nipples using his thumbs. You moaned helplessly and grinded your hips against the growing bulge of his dark underwear.

"Desperate little thing," he groaned, lowering his body to attach his mouth to one of your nipples, making you cry out loudly and try to reach for his black hair.

Since your head was propped up in your pillows, you had a fairly good view of him biting and sucking at your nipples, it wasn't hard, but just enough to make you squirm and whimper under him.

"You have the prettiest tits, baby," he muttered as he nibbled softly at one of your nipples. "Can I mark them?"

You nodded as his gaze found yours. "Yeah, p-please do," you urged.

The corner of his lips lifted before pressing his lips on the underside of your tits and sucked softly. You moaned softly, wanting to run your hand through his hair, but not being able to make you feel more uneasy.

"Oh, Joshua," you whimpered as he made a trail of angry red spots on your tits. It was a strange feeling, having his hot mouth sucking on the skin around your areolas.

"I like these," he muttered, toying with the hem of your thong. "I love that you remembered to wear them."

"How could I not?" you quipped, feeling a bit breathless at the sight of him slotting his head between your thighs, kissing your pulsing clit through the meshy fabric of your thong.

"You could be a sweet talker when you want to," he smiled before pressing his tongue flatly on your core, making you cry out.

He sucked gently at your clit for a moment and then pulled his tongue away, hooking his fingers on your thong to slide them down your legs.

You saw him purse his lips directly above your pussy, and spit fell from his mouth, coating your clit. The sight of it alone made you utter a ridiculous sound.

And just when you thought he was going to continue eating you out, he grabbed something he had hidden beside him on the bed, and you realized by the pinkish color on his hand what it was.

"D'you use this often, sweetheart?" he asked as he pressed on the button of your rose vibrator.

He gently parted your pussy lips with his fingers, making you whimper when he placed the sucking tip of the vibrator directly on your clit.

"I... sometimes," you answered as the toy sucked your clit in its mechanical, trained patterns.

"And what about this one, baby?" he asked softly, grabbing with his free hand a wavy glass dildo.

You groaned, feeling both aroused and embarrassed. If you had your hands free, you'd use them to cover your face.

"What's wrong, baby?" he giggled, seeing your reaction. "I saw your collection of toys. I have a rough idea of what you like, but I want you to tell me."

You rolled your eyes, deeply flustered.

"That's my favorite," you pointed with your nose to the clear dildo, adorned with a pink heart at the end. "But if I want to... do things quickly I use this," you pointed to the toy trying to swallow your clit.

"Oh, really?" he smirked and bent forward to plant a sweet kiss on your lips. "I love the idea of you fucking yourself with your toys, princess," he told you before he kissed one of your hot cheeks.

"You do?" you asked in a high pitch tone.

"Yeah," he breathed, and you just loved the way he said it. "My pretty needy bunny, bouncing on a fucking toy. Now, that's something I'd like to see."

You moaned in his lips. But he pulled away too soon, suddenly turning off the vibrator, making you groan at the loss of stimulation. Then he spit on the tip of the dildo, coating it completely with his drool.

Joshua had a grin on his face when you whined loudly at the sudden intrusion of the glass dildo, the bulbous tip pushing your walls open.

"I see why you like this," he muttered as he pushed further into the second wave. "It looks insane, baby. Your pretty pussy is swallowing it in," he whispered.

The dildo was only halfway in, but apparently that's what Joshua wanted because he started rocking it back and forth in your walls, at the same time he clicked the vibrator on again and attached it to your swollen clit, sucking and sending waves through your body.

You moaned and gasped. You had never had both toys on your cunt before, for obvious reasons.

But the vibrator was relentless and the combination of both was making you writhe and cry of pleasure, feeling really close to your release.

"Joshua!" you cried, writhing in your bed so desperately that the headboard of your bed rattled a bit. "Please, please, don't stop." 

"Are you going to come, princess?" he asked and you nodded your head frantically.

He pulled the toys away from your throbbing cunt in a second. You blinked and furrowed your brow at him. 

His lips were clashing on yours before you could utter a word. He moaned softly as he swiped your lower lip with his tongue.

"Remember how bratty you were today, bunny," he muttered gruffly. "I want you to think of it when I allow you to come."

"Joshua, please, just-" you moaned pathetically, trying to push your hips to the dildo still held directly in front of your sopping core.

"What, baby? What do you want?" he asked, his voice low and raspy.

"I want-" you gasped and gulped.

"Do you want me to keep fucking you with your toys? Or do you want my cock?"

The rope around your wrists tightened when you desperately tried to move your arms. "I want you, please Joshua" you whined.

He hummed, seeming to consider it. "Such a greedy girl," he muttered while he kissed you slowly with his wet lips. "Only behaves when she wants my cock."

The vibrator clicked on again under his thumb, attaching it to your clit again and thrusting the glass dildo on your fluttering walls. You contorted in your bed, trying to get the best out of the pleasure from the toys to sate your sopping core, biting down the inside of your cheek to stop the whimpers and sobs.

"I want to hear you," he said and you cried out instantly, feeling so close again to your release.

You screwed your eyes shut, propping your feet on the mattress to try and thrust your hips further on the dildo, trying to fuck yourself faster on it.

You arched your back just as you were about to have your much desired orgasm. But then Joshua set  the vibrator aside and from your clit.

"Please, please, please," you moaned over and over again. "Shua, please, I need you. Please, fuck me."

Then he pulled away from your body, with one swift movement he got rid of his underwear and slotted his body between your legs. He was sliding down a condom and before you could see what was happening properly, he was pushing his cock in your core with a loud groan.

You cried out in both pleasure and pain as he immediately started thrusting his big cock inside you, pushing your walls open for him.

"Fuck, baby. How are you still this fucking tight?" he groaned, his hands grabbing your hips as he pushed himself until he bottomed out and you could feel his full length inside you.

"Shua," you cried weakly.

"Are you alright, sweetheart?" he asked, pushing into your walls slowly.

"'m fine," you whimpered, closing your eyes to savor the pleasure of finally having him inside you as best as you could. "I just- I love having you inside me."

He giggled sweetly. "You do?"

You nodded with your head. "I love it s-much," you mumbled. "It feels so good."

"You feel great too," he said in a strangled voice.

Then Joshua started thrusting faster and harder, making your body bounce on his cock and the headboard slam repeatedly on the wall. You closed your eyes and swallowed hard as Joshua quite practically fucked you into your bed loudly.

You moaned deliriously when you felt the vibrator attached to your clit again, crying out when it started sending pulsations relentlessly, just as Joshua's hips buckled slightly, and his thrusts became more precise and calculated, holding your hips down with one hand.

"F-fuck," you whimpered, your eyes welling up with tears as you could feel yourself weaken under so much pleasure. 

"Too much, baby?" he asked and you picked up on the hint of concern in his voice.

"'m fine, Shua," you replied in a hoarse voice, blinking your tears helplessly. "I'm-m fuck-"

"You're squirting, baby," he told you in a low tone of awe, his eyes trained on your cunt as he plunged his cock inside you, his hand still pressing the vibrator on your clit.

"But I'm not coming," you protested, lifting your head to see but his hand blocked your view.

"I know, sweetheart," he smirked. "Tell me when you're close."

A frustrated groan fell from your lips and threw your head back against the pillows, avoiding answering.

Joshua let out an amused sigh at your small tantrum and you looked at him—he looked mesmerized. His lascivious eyes trained on you, his lower lip trapped behind his teeth, his black bangs stuck against a light layer of sweat that covered his forehead. 

He was on his knees, sitting back on his heels, the muscles of his abdomen tightening with every thrust, your legs draped on his thighs, a hand grabbing your hips, holding you in place while the other kept the toy pressed on your swollen clit.

The sight alone made your walls flutter and clench around him. You wanted to grab him, to feel his skin. The rails to which you were tied to made a rattling noise when you tried to move your arms.

The pressure building inside you from the toy pressing your clit and his cock pushing inside you—you moaned and squirmed on your bed.

"Shua, 'm close, fuckfuckfuck 'm so close," you whimpered, blinking some tears helplessly.

"What did I tell you, princess?" he pushed his cock inside you in a more demanding way, as if trying to rip your orgasm from you.

"I'll be good, Shua, I'm sorry-," you breathed desperately. "Jus' le-let me cum, please?"

"You learn fast," he praised with a lazy smirk. "You can cum, baby," he nodded, his face riddled with lust.

A second later you were writhing, crying out his name, the rope tightening around your wrists as you came hard, back arching and walls spasming erratically around his cock.

"Joshua," you breathed as he rode your high with precise and calculated thrusts.

A faint thought appeared in your mind—you probably looked like a mess, tied to the rails of your bed, hickeys all over your tits, crying and babbling nonsense.

"Fuck, I can't—Shua," you moan an writhed, feeling your core ache and spasm helplessly under the overwhelming stimulation.

"Are you safewording, bunny?" he asked, again, there was that tone of concern.

You shook your head weakly on your pillows. "No—don't stop, I want you, oh Joshua—fuck, fuck!"

You tried to press your ass down on the bed, trying to create some distance from the painful sensation in your oversensitive clit. Joshua appeared to be reading on how your body reacted, and changed the mode of the vibrator to a more delicate one. 

You screwed your eyes shut, feeling like you could sink into a void from all the pleasure your body was feeling, it was almost breaking you. 

You heard a soft sigh. "My pretty bunny. Do you like being fucked silly?" he was smiling from the tone of his voice.

"Love it—love having your cock inside me s'much," you replied almost instantly in a slurry babble.

That made him laugh. "Can you give me another one then, sweetheart? Cum for me again."

You nodded, savoring your fourth orgasm of the day. Your fingers clenched the rope as a form of soothing your body from the waves of pleasure threatening to wash over you. 

"Shua," you whimpered.

"I know, baby," he groaned, blinking slowly as he threw his head back ever so slightly. "I know."

Something snapped inside you, making you close your eyes so tightly you saw colors and then a slew of cries and hoarse moans came out of your mouth until you were breathless and crying from the overwhelming pleasure, the tears running down your temples.

"Fuck, baby," he groaned, and you knew from his face that he was cumming with you. His slightly parted mouth, eyelids fluttering, fingers digging at your hips.

The slamming noises from the headboard against the wall of your bedroom ceased, as Joshua threw the vibrator across the bed, his thrusts lazily coming to a stop with a last strangled moan.

You saw him bend his body forward to untie you in a swift tug of his fingers.

Then his hands were cupping your face, his lips slotting in yours, kissing you fervently.

"You're so good for me, bunny," he muttered in between kisses. "So, so good for me."

Your arms languidly wrapped around his neck as you returned his heated kiss. You moaned at the feeling of having his hot mouth on yours, savoring him.

"Are you okay, sweetheart?" he asked after you didn't respond.

"Uh-huh," you replied weakly.

He pressed his chapped lips in a smile that made your heart jolt. Looking at you with a glint of endearment as his fingers gathered some tears that were gathered in the corners of your eyes.

"You sure?" he whispered, his eyebrows knitting together.

You nodded. "'m sure."

"D'you want me to stay?" he asked hesitantly.

"Please?"

He blinked slowly at you, a cute smile stretching his lips. "Of course," he nodded. "Let me take care of you then."

He planted a soft kiss on your forehead and left the bed against your small groan in protest. When he returned a moment later, he had discarded the condom and you could hear the faint noise from the shower running in the bathroom.

"Don't move. I'll carry you," he said as he slid his arms beneath your body, bringing you up to his chest effortlessly.

"Thanks," you mumbled, feeling yourself come back to your senses.

"Don't thank me, baby," he mumbled, glancing at your face with a cautious look.

He set you down on the floor and guided you to stand under the showerhead. The warm water worked its magic, reviving your muscles and senses back to life.

Joshua was looking at you with his curious eyes, as he usually did. But this time, he looked kind of worried.

"Was it too much?" he finally asked as he watched your body soak in the warm water. "You're really quiet."

A reassuring smile crept in your lips. "I'm fine, Joshua. You don't have to worry about me," you replied.

"But I do, let me worry," he said, taking one of your hands to examine your wrists, which were reddened.

Your heart jolted again. "I liked it, Shua. Otherwise I would've told you, right?" you mumbled sheepishly.

His big eyes met yours, and you could see his features relax. His hand released yours to find your nape and pull you into a tender kiss.

"Thank you for trusting me," he muttered, resting his forehead against yours.

It was deafening and alarming—your heart was strumming against your chest, fast; a flutter of nervousness in your tummy. Fuck, this can't be happening, you told yourself. But a part of you knew this was bound to happen.

You were falling in love. 

✮ a/n: first of all: can we pretend that vernon knows how to play the electric bass for the sake of this chapter pls (˘･_･˘)

thank you to everyone who showed love to part i and for the ones who waited for part 2 ty ty ty! i made this chapter extra juicy for those who waited tehe

what do you guys think Midnight Haze sound like? i thought of something like nothing but thieves or sam fender [especially this cover song] but do let me know your opinions! [links re-direct to youtube vids]

you can send an ask, chat with me, or drop your comments don't be shy (◠‿◠)

✮ READ PART 3 !! ✮

click here to join my taglist (. ❛ ᴗ ❛.)

toodles

[uniquexusposts]

Below Deck | C. Leclerc (2)

Summary: Y/n and Charles had broken up a few weeks ago. Y/n thought it was a good idea to enter the yachting world to get over the break up, but suddenly he shows up at the last charter of the season. How will they cope with it? Words: 2008 Read the story that was based off the one shot here Part 1

"Do you watch F1?" It was Max who asked it.

Luca, Otis and Y/n were standing in the lounge. They were having a conversation with the guests, well, Max, Charles, Carlos and Pierre did. They just got back from the beach picnic. Y/n hated that these people were polite, curious and just... Why can't they leave me alone? Luca stirred Y/n into the conversation, and she couldn't just leave.

"Yes, I do! Well, not so much now I work all the time, but where I can, I follow it," Luca said.

Luca was such a sweetheart. He always looked angry, but that was just his facial structure. And he looked so intimidating because of his muscles, but he was a real sweetheart.

"I'm more of a NASCAR guy, I'm sorry," Otis mentioned awkwardly.

Otis was the guy who was probably the most responsible. He never had drama, never. But when there was drama, he was always there. He sometimes had funny comebacks. Together with Y/n, they were drama free.

"And Y/n says she doesn't watch F1," Luca said and wrapped his arm around her shoulders. "But I think she secretly does."

Y/n played along with him. "Secretly, I'm a big fan," she smirked. "But don't tell anyone."

"See, I knew it," Luca laughed.

The guests laughed along, trying to not make it awkward. Y/n had to bite her lip to try not to burst into laughter because it was so fake and uncomfortable. She knew almost everything about F1.

"The next race is..?" Luca asked.

"France and right after that, Budapest. The last races before the break," Pierre responded.

"Very cool. I can catch up with it right after we finish this job," Luca happily said. "The last race I saw was with the accident, Imola, I believe." He let go of Y/n. "Dear Lord, that looked horrible."

Y/n pressed her jaws on each other, and her face straightened. She quickly remembered she had guests - who were still her friends - in front of her, so she relaxed all the muscles in her face. Get out of here.

"It looked more horrible than it actually was," Charles replied. "Which was explained later on."

This was a sneer, and Y/n knew it. She looked impressed and nodded. "Of course it did," she mumbled.

Pierre and Carlos looked at Y/n and then at Charles; if looks could kill... They looked at each other and sent each other a look. A look that told: it's bad.

"May I ask how it was for you? I really can't imagine how it must be to be in that car. It really looked so bad. What a small touch can cause..."

Italy, Imola, Sunday. Everything started fine that afternoon until a gearbox of a driver stopped working. Red flag. All the cars went to the pits. Very unfortunate for the driver who had his race finished way too early.

On the other hand, Charles could make an advantage with the restart since the official start went like shit. The car was removed from the track, and everyone was ready for a standing restart. So it began again.

Until Charles Leclerc got a small touch of someone.

Charles shoved over the track at many kilometres per hour. His car flipped upside down. His car hit the barrier with 40G. His car crashed and shattered completely. It took the people over 30 minutes to get him out of the car. It took Ferrari another 90 minutes before a statement was released.

"When you get into a F1 car, you're packed. The impact was gigantic, and I saw my life playing in front of my eyes, but it really looked worse from the outside than from what I saw in the cockpit. Thank god for every regulation and the modern cars," Charles summarised.

"My goodness, it still sounds horrible. I'm glad you got out safely," Luca mentioned, relieved. "I feel like, when it goes wrong, it goes good wrong. Just like with Zhou at Silverstone last year."

"That one was pretty ugly as well," Max agreed.

"I still think the crash of Grojean is the worst in years," Y/n stirred. "I saw it happening, and I thought: nope, we're not doing this again. When he got out of the car, I've never felt so relieved," she said.

Pierre nodded. "He got so lucky. I've seen the reconstruction video, and I heard his story; it was so... I don't have words for it."

"F1 is an ugly sport," Y/n blurted.

"It depends," Charles shot back.

"It is an ugly sport," Y/n sneered.

"Felix for Y/n," the radio went off.

Thank you so much. Y/n grabbed the transceiver from her skirt and held it to her mouth. "Go ahead," she said.

"Can you make two mojitos for Kelly and Rebecca, and bring them to the front deck?"

"I'm on it," she said. "If you will excuse me," Y/n smiled and walked away without waiting for a response.

The smile on her face dropped straight away, and her eyebrows lowered. She was so done with everything, and she wanted to go home so badly. Then she remembered that she didn't have a home, so she had to return to her dad. Y/n was close to having a breakdown but had to keep it together. She arrived at the bar and made two mojito's as requested. Y/n brought them to the two girls and walked to the laundry room to fold and steam some clothes.

She walked with the folded clothes to the bedrooms of the guests. She knocked on every door, making sure no one was in there. In two of the bedrooms, it was that case. Y/n knocked on the last door and opened it without hesitation as she expected it to be empty.

"Oh, excusez-moi," Y/n said when she saw someone in the room of Pierre and Charles. She stepped outside and closed the door behind her. It could be Pierre, she hoped not for Charles.

"No, it's fine."

It was Charles.

"I have your clothes," Y/n mentioned. "Or Pierre's," she mumbled, trying to not give him attention.

The door opened from the inside. "Thank you," he said. "You can put it in the closet."

A sigh left her mouth. For some reason, she didn't accept it. Now it really felt like he was using her. Well, he paid for this service, but it just felt so weird to Y/n.

"Sure, perfect," she said and entered his room again. It was deadly silence, awkward silence, in the room. Y/n placed the clothes in the closet.

"Why did you say that?" Charles suddenly asked.

"Said what?" Y/n was glad that no one from the crew on this boat spoke French. She could hold a conversation without them knowing what they were talking about. Now she had to control the tone of her voice.

"That F1 is an ugly sport."

"Because it is."

"That is not fair to say."

"Why? It's my opinion." Y/n stepped to the door, ready to leave the room.

"It is not fair, Y/n," he repeated.

She closed the door behind her and stepped toward him. "You know what is not fair? The time that you have let me wait after your accident in Imola. Do you remember how long it took me to discover that you were alive? Two fucking hours," Y/n whisper-yelled.

"I still do not understand why this is why you broke up with me," Charles replied in the same tone.

"For me, it is."

"Why? Tell me why, Y/n. Or is that even too much to ask?"

Her face straightened. "I'm not doing this here. Find someone else to mock on, Charles." She stepped towards the door again.

"Explain it to me! I had asked my team multiple times to contact my family when I was at the medical centre; how many times do I have to tell you that?"

"It is so fucking ridiculous that I had to wait for two hours. I had no idea if you were alive, if you were dead. Nothing. Those two hours were almost the two longest hours of my fucking life. Perhaps you were dead, I don't know," she replied and shrugged. "It's the fact that I had to read it in a statement on social media, I didn't get that message from you personally. Even if it was two hours later, it would have been much better than a social media statement on Twitter."

"Why are you still blaming me for it? I have asked-"

"You don't get the point, do you?"

"Then explain it to me, Y/n. I have been guessing for weeks, and I still don't know what went wrong." Charles scanned Y/n's face, and he noticed the change in her eyes. A glossy layer washed over her eyes, and they became bloodshot. Her shoulders hung low, and she looked down. Charles straightened his face and looked down as well. "I am sorry, Y/n," he whispered.

She was shaking her head, and she took a short breath. Soft sniffs filled the room. "I am sorry."

"Mon amour..." Charles stepped towards her and wrapped his arms around her. He pressed a kiss on her forehead and stroked her back. He closed his eyes when she snuggled her face against his shoulder. His heart broke again.

"My mum," Y/n began and pulled back. "She...erm..."

Charles knew her mother passed away nine years ago. He had no idea what she had to do with this.

"...passed away in a car accident," she softly said. "One night, she didn't come home from work and..." She took a deep breath. "She caused an accident because she was drunk, five other people passed away, and four people got injured."

"Jesus Christ," he whispered. "I'm so sorry, I didn't know that." Everything started to make sense now.

"We only found out a day later because the police failed to contact us."

All the strings got connected together. Accident and no communication.

"So when you crashed and when I didn't get any updates, I panicked. And when I read the statement, I got so angry because... I'm sorry. I probably overreacted," Y/n mumbled and dried her eyes. "But I didn't want this to happen again, and I...the same rollercoaster began. I should have talked to you."

Charles retook her in his arms. It was her trauma, and she panicked. Of course, she would get angry. "You never told me this..."

"It's not really a positive thing to talk about, is it?" She closed her eyes and wrapped her arms around his waist. "My dad asked us not to talk about it with anyone because, you know, we're the family with the alcoholic mother who killed five people."

"Is that why you moved to France?"

"Yup..." She took a deep breath and looked at him. "I'm sorry, I should have reacted differently. It was not your fault. I was just really scared that something bad happened with you, and I compared this situation with my situation."

"But why did you run away, baby?" He whispered and stroked a piece of hair behind her ear.

"I was scared." When Y/n blinked, tears rolled down her cheek. "It's a stupid reason, but I was scared. And then I got an offer to work on this yacht... I am so sorry, Charles. Working in this environment makes you forget everything around you, but I collapsed when I saw you again. Mentally and physically." One thing she loved about Charles was that he gave her time to speak; he never pushed her to talk. "And I fucked it up, I know. I am sorry."

Charles showed a small smile. "You should have told me..." He kissed her forehead again.

"I know, I'm sorry." Y/n looked at him; of course, she wanted to redo the moment, but she couldn't turn back the time. "I know it was not your fault, I know I hurt you, I..."

It was silence between the two again.

Y/n was deciding whether this was a moment where they would fix it or not. Of course, she hoped he could forgive her, but she hurt them by hiding her own problems.

"How many more days until you are done?" Charles suddenly asked.

"Two."

"Two?"

Y/n nodded. "You're the last charter."

He gently pushed her head in his direction, making him look her in the eyes again. "Do you want to come home then?"

Her face softened, and new tears came into her eyes. "Really?"

"Yes, really," he smiled. "Only if you want."

"Yes, please, I'd love to."

They looked at each other, and they pressed their lips to each other.

Taglist: @itsjustkhaos@crashingwavesofeuphoria@maryvibess @softi92

[squiddy-god]

I saw chainsaw man was in your fandom list so could I request Denji realizing he’s falling for a guy for the first time? He gives me chaotic bi guy vibes

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Ok so as a chaotic bi guy myself i clocked denji day one- i also decided to do this as hcs because i have so many thoughts- its me, the bisexuality devil lmao 

♥︎request are open ♥︎

Cw : slight suggestive bits (chainsaw man lvls),so canon typical levels of nsfw. STILL SFW NO SMUT IN THIS,  BI DENJI SUPREMACY, bi panic and maybe a bit of heteronormativity, simping.

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Denji is the poster boy for chaotic bi panic 

The thing that most people, especially in the series itself don't realize is that denjis goal isn't just to have sex and touch boobs, it to live a normal life because he has been so deprived of any basics and normality 

But denji struggles in realizing that he's in love with a dude, a man, a guy, a homie. 

It probably happens because you are genuinely nice to him- my boy has standards so low it trips the devils 

At first he thinks your just his best bud, his greatest pal- it's totally normal that he thinks about you so much, that he really likes holding your hand, that he gets excited like a puppy when he knows hes going to see you again

It's perfectly normal how much time he spends in your apartment- like he basically lives there

Power is about to actually kill him if he mentions you one more time she's so sick of it

Never once does it ever cross his mind that he might be into guys too (boobs are boobs tbh)

He is over at your apartment so much that it isn't uncommon for him to just,,,let himself in (you said you don't mind 

Denji is already kinda a mess, he's a nervous wreck when it comes to a lot of romance stuff (we love a boy failure) so he's already pretty chaotic even before he realizes that he's absolutely simping for you 

But his crush is so obvious its hitting “if s/o was a girl id totally be into him, like smash- like my girlfriend” levels of denial

And he's not fooling anyone 

He starts to slowly realize that having dreams about your best friend, and having to continuously correct the dreams so that one of you is the girl, isn't just being close friends 

He really panics when he thinks he might be gay- he doesn't really know being bi is an option but is relieved to find that out lmao 

He decides to make sure by looking at magazines featuring men, other media etc to make sure you aren't just some glitch- and nope hes bi 

“Boobs are boobs” ahh reasoning- genuinely he is not picky lmao (chaos bi) 

Despite this he still claims that you are just his best bud, his pal, chum, homie, compadre, friend, home slice etc. 

Until the incident 

And by that I mean he saw you practically naked- he had let himself into your apartment like normal, honestly he probably planned on casually coming out- not confessing! afterall you were just his friend (delusional) 

But as he's sitting in your living room he here's the door open down the hall, when he speaks his head out he's frozen in place because daymn. There you are with wet hair and just a towel around your waist- and denji panics big time- when i say he literally flees your apartment i mean it. 

And that was really what he needed, because this starts his downward spiral of realizing that he has indeed fallen for you and has massive crush on you

He realizes that this is honestly one of his first crushes in general because denji struggles with his emotions and figuring out the different types of affection, hell even the lines between romantic attraction and sexual attraction he really struggles 

But he (and everyone else) is positive that this isn't just him realizing he is into guys, but that he genuinely wants to do all the normal couple stuff with you

Like yes denjis thoughts can be sexual but the biggest thing he struggles with is that he feels all warm and mushy at the thought of calling you his boyfriend and having a normal relationship. 

Power is yalls #1 hater btw, not that she doesnt support you but it's that she is sick of denji just fumbling the bag 

She gags whenever he mentions you lmao, watching denji fumble around his thoughts and feelings is painful because he is so awkward 

I firmly believe in BI denji supremacy, he is such a bisexual disaster

[scorpioriesling]

I Look In People's Windows

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* ✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* ✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* ✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* ✧･ﾟ: *

Pairing(s): Eris x reader

Warnings: angst

Summary: It's been years... years since the breakup. He is no longer yours. He never really was, always keeping you at a distance. But, there were some good times. Maybe that's why you keep hoping to see him again, anywhere. Just one more time.

SR’s Note: Cannot get this song out of my head, and yes I am doing an Eris story! I love writing him. This one ends happy, just trust.

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* ✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* ✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* ✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* ✧･ﾟ: *

The day he left was the day you'd changed.

He'd tried to reason with you, to make you see why you couldn't be together anymore; it was the day his father killed his younger brother's lover.

Perhaps, he changed on that day too.

"You have to go," he'd said. "You have to get out of here. Now." You remembered it like it was yesterday; there was no option for questioning or changing his mind this time. You'd already started crying, before the argument began.

"I don't care, Eris! I love you, I can't just leave..." You could still feel the way your heart broke, split right in two. Eris had been frenzied, frantically gathering your things and packing them in a backpack.

"And I love you! Don't you see that? I mean, really -- don't you get it?" He threw the backpack on the bed, and you'd watched from the doorway, water dripping from your chin and onto the expensive oak flooring.

"I know you're afraid, but-" He charged over to you, taking your wrists in his hands.

"I am not afraid. Of nothing. Of no one." He said, so close you could feel his breath on your nose. You narrowed your watery eyes at him.

"You are." Is all you said. He dropped your hands, returning to the bed and snatching up the backpack. His back had still been turned to you when he said:

"I won't have you end up dead like Jesminda." Another silent sob racked your body, and you tried hard to keep from shaking.

"You know I'd love you to the ends of Prythian, Y/N." He said, voice quieter now as he approached you and slipped your arms into the staps of the pack. "I would do anything for you." A tear slipped past his eyeline. "Hell, I would jump into the cauldron for you-"

"I don't need anyone jumping into anything," you say, brushing your thumb over his tear-stained cheek. "I just need you. Me. I don't want to not know you anymore." The last part came out shakily. "Does it feel alright to not know me?"

His hands pulled your waist close, and he wrapped his arms around you one more time. You remembered feeling his shoulders shaking, your tears staining his mahogony jacket as you buried your face in his chest. You inhaled deep, smelling his campfire and cinnamon scent one more time...

And now here you were, still addicted to the "if only"s. If only he'd let you stay. If only he'd run with you. If only he was still yours...

You hadn't realized you'd wandered out of your neighborhood, and into the town square. The sky was gray and dull; reflecting how you'd felt inside. When was the last time you'd truly seen the sunshine?

On the last day you'd spent with your love.

Meandering through the Autumn court streets was usually peaceful, not many people being out this time of year as the air had turned a bit chilly. You would constantly check inside shops, the big windows highlighting the guests inside. You don't know what you'd do if you saw him now; its been years since he told you to leave. You'd listened, and stayed away; but that didn't help your mind playing tricks on you. Thinking you'd seen him boarding a train; seeing him at the tables of Christmas parties you couldn't bring yourself to attend.

You were pulled from your thoughts when you heard the conversations around you, growing more and more as you'd ventured further into the square.

"I heard his kid did it."

"I can't believe the High Lord is actually dead."

"I was told that the oldest son slayed him, out of pure hatred."

What were they talking about? Certainly if they were discussing Lord Beron, you would have heard the news by now. If what they were saying was true and he was really dead, that would mean...

"Ahh, thank you Mariella. You always know exactly why I've come!"

Your body freezes, the whisper of sound drifting from an open doorway to a bakery on your left. You'd recognize that honey-dripped voice anywhere.

You break into a sprint, right for the bakery.

You knew you weren't decieving yourself this time.

Peering in through the storefront, you catch sight of his radiant curls, piled on his head. His genuine smile exposes his perfect canines; a smile you hadn't seen in so long. One you'd never thought you'd see again. He looked almost the exact same, just how you remembered him from all those years ago.

Your breath fogged up the glass, and you wiped it with your sleeve. The small squeak that came from the action caused Eris and the cashier to both peer out at you, and you felt an electricity bolt shoot through you when your eyes met his one more time.

He murnured something quickly to the woman, and raced out of the store. When he cleared the entry way, he stared at you in silence for a few beats, utter shock on his face like he was seeing you for the first time all over again. He took one small step towards you, and you couldn't wait any longer. You ran to him and threw your arms around his neck, his wrapping around your waist and twirling you around. When he finally set you down, you pulled back and met those whiskey orbs, solely focused on you. You didn't care who was staring. You didn't care what people said. You only cared about the male in front of you.

"Eris, what... what happened?" You asked, voice breaking as you tried to contain the happy tears running down your face. He only smiled back at you longingly, taking one hand in yours and placing the other in your hair, finally feeling your wispy tendrils he missed so much.

"I feel as though I've waited forever for this," he admits, pulling you in closer. When his lips meet yours, the sweet apple taste is back. One you'd missed for so long. He continues kissing you for a few moments, relishing in the fact that you were finally back in his arms.

"And," he says, pulling away and resting his forehead on yours. "I'm not afraid anymore."

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* ✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* ✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* ✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* ✧･ﾟ: *

[peachymilkandcream]

Movie!William Afton x Wife!Reader Scrapped Part 2

(A/N: Someone asked in the comments of the last one for a Part 2 and here we are! Part 2 of Scrapped babyyyy! In which Vanessa is reunitted with her mother. I also may or may not have been watching Markiplier's FNAF playthroughs while writing this but hey. Hope you enjoy and please read the warnings!)

WARNINGS: Implied and mentions of noncon, dubcon, violence, domestice violence, age difference, power dynamic, murder, yandere behaviour, yandere themes, gaslighting, emotional manipulation, descriptions of gore

=============================================

William had been recovering well, his deep wounds had become little more than dark red dents in his skin as he healed. Husband and wife had been silent since that night, aside from simple requests and small talk they hadn't talked about what they saw, what they knew. She knew about the murders, she knew what he was, each of the children, stuffed into the suits of the place where they had brought their own children so many times. And yet she said nothing.

"So are we going to pretend nothing happened?" He asked all of a sudden while she changed his bandages.

"What do you mean?"

"The murders. You know. What got me into that suit, surely you figured it out by now, you're not that stupid."

She pauses for a moment, just long enough to convey her true feelings. "Yes I know."

Annoyed she doesn't continue he presses further. "And? You can't just say nothing."

"What is there to say William? You killed children, you almost died. What more can I say? You think I'd leave you now? Report you to the police?"

"That's how most normal people would react."

His wife sighs, trying to find the words. "Look. You're my husband. I have no life outside of our marriage. No education, nowhere to go, I don't know where Micheal or Vanessa are because you told me they left without a trace so how could I get rid of you? You're my support, my rock."

William lets a half smile come to his face, this was the woman of his dreams. Sticking by him through thick and thin. He almost regrets not telling her years ago about what he did, maybe then he could have someone to help clean up his messes. "You're really are special, you know that?"

She blushes and he tucks a strand of hair behind her ear, settling his hand on her chin and pulling her closer and in for a kiss. All his schemes and plans had led up to this, and he wouldn't trade it for anything.

===========================================

Every once and a while Vanessa liked to visit the old place, despite everything her father had done she had some fond memories as a child here. It was the one place where her mother was happy, all the other memories she had of her were crying or blindly agreeing with whatever her dad said. The times she'd venture to the back office just to witness her father forcing her mother down. Vanessa shivered, sure this place had a few good moments, but most were overcast by the dark shadow of her father's madness.

But memories wasn't why she was there that night, she was searching for William. Ever since that night she couldn't get him out of her head, he was most likely dead from his wounds, but the thought didn't comfort her. She had never actually seen him die, and knowing him, it was like he had nine lives. Worry brought her out tonight, she had to see the body to feel safe in her own home again, content that he really was never going to come for her again.

It didn't help that she couldn't find it now, from what Mike had told her the children had dragged him away in that damn suit, but to where was anyone's guess. The place had always been too big, and now she was scouring it just for a peace of mind.

Lights other than her own flashlight in the main dining room caught her attention. She hoped Mike hadn't brought Abby back to visit, she could kill him for that if William was somehow still alive. But her flashlight slid from her hand when she saw the woman she thought she'd never see again.

"...Mom?"

Her mother looked up, surprised to hear the voice, but tearing up when she saw her sweet daughter. "Vanessa? Is that you my dear? Oh my what are you doing here?"

She holds out her arms for a hug, which Vanessa rushes into. How long had it been since she'd talked to her? Every time she had phoned William answered and demanded that she never call back. The one time the call went through all her mother did was defend William with every breath she had even as Vanessa told her about the crimes he had committed.

"I missed you mom-" Vanessa gives her one final squeeze before letting go. "I should ask what you're doing here."

"Well these things were your father's pride and joy, it hurts me to see them rot like this. Plus I feel like I have more of an understanding of them now."

Vanessa perked up. "Now? Why now?"

Her mother met her gaze. "I know about it Vanessa, what William did, I know about it all."

She sighs with relief, finally her mother believed all the rumours, now with dad gone she could be free of him, free to live her life. "I'm glad you don't have to live with the lies anymore Mom, he kept so much from you."

"I'm sure he had his reasons, your father is a headstrong man."

Frustration flowed through Vanessa, she always did this, her mother never had a backbone on anything except when it came to Dad. People regularly walked all over her and she just accepted whatever anyone said except if it was against that man. "Mom he kept me and Micheal from you."

"But honey you never called, how could he keep me from you."

Tears spring into her eyes. "I called Mom...I called...so many times, he answers and then doesn't tell you I've phoned-"

"Now why would your father do that?"

"Because he's a psychopath Mom, I've been telling you this for years. He hurt you, he neglected us, he murdered children! How can you defend him?!"

"Don't raise your tone at me young lady."

Vanessa sighs and tries to calm her nerves. "Why didn't you leave him Mom?"

She crosses her arms. "And go where Vanessa? You and Micheal left and without an education or a means to support myself where could I go? Your father has given me everything I could ask for. And on top of that I love him to death."

"He hurt you Mom-"

"And I needed a bit of discipline when I was young and reckless, I've changed for the better."

Vanessa sighs. "Whatever, I won't argue." She shifts feet awkwardly. "How have you been holding up though? With him gone."

What she didn't expect was her mother to seem confused. "What are you talking about? Your father hasn't gone anywhere."

Her eyebrows furrow, and dread fills her as she hears footsteps. The same dread that filled her dreams, praying that she wouldn't see her father come through those doors like he did now. "There are you are my love. And who's this? You found dear Vanessa, coming to find me and fix me up, don't worry sweetheart, your mother already did that."

Vanessa stares at her mother with wide eyes. "You helped him!? Why!? Why didn't you just let this bastard rot!?"

"He's your father Vanessa, be respectful, and besides, I couldn't just leave him here to die could I?"

"Yes! You could have avenged those poor children!"

William smirked. "As you can see your mother hasn't forgotten her loyalties like you have. She fixed me up good as new, she was worried about me unlike you. I knew you'd come back, I knew you wouldn't have let that wound kill you so easily. Now you prey on your mother, filling her head with doubts and ideas to fit your selfish narrative. No more. You will never speak to her again or else I'll finish what I started."

"I can't do that Dad, I can't let you continue hurting her."

William sighed. "That's such a shame. We could have been a family again but you insist on breaking your mother's heart." He runs a hand through his wife's hair. "Sweetheart? Go wait in the car while I take care of this with our daughter."

She simply nods, leaving the two alone and not questioning the murderous look in his eye.

"Now Vanessa, shall we finish this?"

============================================

A long time had passed, and finally William joined her in the car.

"Is everything okay honey?" She asked.

"Yes dear, Vanessa and I had a good heart to heart, she won't be bothering us again."

She accepted it, as always, although deep down she questioned why a heart to heart covered him in so much blood.

[marivoid]

Entry 35

Day 228

Scott.

The same Scott who was supposed to no longer be here. The same Scott who had gone missing in our G.U.I.D.E.- The same Scott who had dark blonde hair the last time I saw him. Somebody who didn't have blue-tinted skin and an icy stare.

Somebody who didn't have ANTLERS of all things.

All I could do was stare. That was all I did. I just took in the face of the man who... that was my best friend. But it's been ten years. By the Watchers, I wish I knew what happened to him.

"You are not supposed to be here, Martyn."

His voice had changed too. Rougher. More defensive.

"And you are supposed to be in the G.U.I.D.E, but here you are. You're changed. You're not..."

"Not what? Not normal? Not that stupid, aloof boy who ran around the G.U.I.D.E with my head so far up in the clouds I couldn't tell reality from fiction?"

A sigh had escaped my lips back then. I wish it didn't. "You were never aloof, Scott. You were incredibly smart and witty and could do so many wonderful things- But then you left. You vanished in the middle of the night. You left the G.U.I.D.E! You left the people you were supposed to help- You left... You left me!"

"NOT WILLINGLY!" His hands slammed against his chest. "Look at me, Martyn! Does it look like I left willingly?! Those damned Watchers, feeding your brain- I bet you still believe everything they told you too!" The world around us had gotten quiet. People were looking.

And the "Jimmy" guy finally stepped in between us.

"Scott- Scott, hey, you don't need to tell him anything." He was definitely trying his best to keep the peace. But I've been told that I'm one stubborn bastard.

"No, actually, I think you do!" Jimmy's wing -Golden and soft and organic- stopped me in my path. "Scott, you left the night of your birthday! You left after freaking- You KISSED me, damnit! And then left! I thought you had died!"

"I WAS TAKEN YOU DUMBASS!" His hands got more blue with... With ice. Ice that he should have never had.

"Scott, you really don't need to do this, you know it makes you upset-"

"OH REALLY?! WERE YOU?! THAT SOUNDS LIKE A HELL OF A LOT OF BULLSHIT TO ME!" I shouldn't have yelled back then. Especially with Brian cawing the way he was.

"I WAS! THE WATCHERS ARE NOTHING BUT AN EVIL GROUP THAT JUST WANTED TO TORMENT US!" He was crying now. I, ME, I made him cry. Over ten years and I made him cry. But my anger was still speaking for me.

"And why would they want to hurt us, Scott?! They gave us everything!"

"They took away everything from us, what do you mean?!"

"ENOUGH!" Pearl's voice. I was pushed back from Scott while Jimmy stood in front of Scott like he was something that needed to be protected.

Needed to be protected from ME.

I should have been the one to protect him. I shouldn't have made him scared, but I did.

"Both of you are acting childish- You both are taking this out of my Emporium. Now!"

And that was how we got kicked out. And yet Jimmy was still protecting Scott.

Even when we left the Emporium and were finally in a quiet place... I still let myself be dumb. I wish Brian poked my head more often for my dumbass-ery at that moment.

"I thought you were dead."

"I'm not."

"They told me you left- That you hated the G.U.I.D.E and wanted to let yourself die in the wastelands. I... Didn't want to believe them."

"You did. Didn't you?"

My silence was the wrong answer.

"Martyn. You're a dumbass. You're a stubborn dumbass who never thinks things through. Why the hell would you even come out here?"

I held my arm up for him. His stunned expression... I wish it hadn't been with tears in his eyes. "A year after you left, a virus ran rampant. Killed everyone. Took my arm. I had to slice it off before it destroyed me." Scott's and Jimmy's shared silence let me continue. "Had to make a prosthetic. It was absolutely dog water. Held up for a while though. A couple of years. But then I had to make another one. And another... And another. It was okay for a while! Wish you had been there, Scott, would have been really nice to have my best friend with me to keep me sane but hey! Shit happens.

I made a fourth one when these... Bandits broke in. Took everything in there. I had to leave. I've been out here for almost a whole year now. Trying to find the Doctor. Give me an arm that will actually last." When I looked at Scott, his eyes were so... Empty. Void of anything. "When you left, everything changed. I became the Admin of the G.U.I.D.E. I got to read so many books- Things that I wanted to share with you!"

"I never said you had to be Admin, Martyn! I never even hinted at it!"

"I did it for you, Scott! Damnit, I did it so you and I could have been happy together! Unlimited access to everything, keep the G.U.I.D.E healthy and strong- We wanted that!"

"YOU wanted that, Martyn!" His hands collided with my chest. Gods I wish I wasn't so angry. I wish I had held his hands. I wished I hadn't gotten so headstrong. "Those were your dreams! I just wanted to be happy with you! That's why the Watchers took me away!"

More tears. His face turned an ugly shade of purple and ice crawled along my torso. I still have frost burn on my chest from it.

"That's... That can't be why. Why would they take you away just because you made me happy? That's stupid! That's absolutely stupid to even suggest-"

"Because you're too dumb to realize what they were getting at! We were just players in a game for them, Martyn!"

Jimmy stepped in. Again. And this time I didn't get a chance to speak. Not with a feathered wing shoved in my mouth.

"Scott. Enough. You don't owe this guy anything. Come on. Let's get home."

Two pairs of eyes glared at me as they walked away. One pair that I wish I'd been more calm with. I wish that I had just pushed down that rush of anger- Goodness-

His pen hit the paper with a loud shout. "GOD DAMNIT!" He held his head in his hands as he stared at the unfinished entry. "God damnit. I fucked up. I... Fucked up so much." A caw. "Yeah, I know. Big time."

Martyn didn't even bother to sign the entry. He shut the leather journey and tucked it away in his backpack. "I don't think I'll ever see him again either. He'll never forgive me. By the Watchers... What did he mean by that? Taken?? Nobody gets taken for making somebody else happy! That's just ludicrous!"

Another unamused caw.

"Yeah, yeah, I know. Stupid." He collapsed onto the incredibly hard bed and let out a groan. "Ow... Forget these things are practically concrete..."

A cawing-like laughter from the bird.

"Oh ha ha. Very funny Brian."

Martyn rolled onto his stomach and stared at the comm. The reflection disgusted him. That reflection was him. "I need to find him again. I... I need to apologize to him, Brian. It's been almost fourteen years. I need to make things right by him. I need to hear him out, find out what happened to him. I made it sound like it was HIS fault for the G.U.I.D.E collapsing."

Another caw. Much louder.

"I know. Pretty shit of me. He's... He looks like he's been through a lot as well. He didn't have those antlers. Didn't have blue skin. He's... I've messed up so much."

Another quiet caw, followed by a trill. Martyn didn't bother to move as a weight made itself comfortable against Martyn's side.

"Didn't know you'd be a cuddly fella." His hand traced the bird's head while a quiet coo escaped its metallic beak. "Warning, I might move a lot in my sleep. Don't peck me if I end up rolling over."

Another caw and an unamused look.

"Just a warning, little fella." A yawn escaped his lips. "G'night, Brian. Sleep well."

Martyn was out before the bird could chirp again.

(@hermitadaymay )

[the-cat-and-the-birdie]

NERD!MIGUEL IS SO REAL I LUV HIM <3333

NERD!MIGUEL IS THERE I KNOW IT

Like...You saw what he said to Gwen when she called it a watch (which IT IS).

[omg she's so tiny small next to him]

He's a NERD. He thinks this stuff is COOL. He's WAITING FOR SOMEONE TO ASK.

Like I imagine he's used to it by now - people's eyes glazing over when he begins to explain something technical or program-y, like Lyla's algorithms or the Multiverse Anti-Glitch feature of the watches.

He's put SO much work into all of this, the whole facility and the tech.

He made Lyla himself, but he knows that most people aren't really interested in that. So he's learned to simplify things.

If you ask a question, like how he made Lyla - he'll answer it basic and to the point.

_-_ 'She's an AI. She's my assistant and the notification system within your watch.'

He probably won't even look up from his work, thinking it's just the routine questions everyone asks before moving on to the next thing.

BUT IF YOU ASK FURTHER - Miguel's like

Because it's not often someone actually like...does that.

It's probably very rare that someone shows interest in his technological, engineering, or physics studies - all of which he's INCREDIBLY talented at and actively working on

You ask him how long it took him to make her, he says a year or two.

You tell him how impressive that is and BOOM NERD!Miguel.

He's telling you how her voice detection took the longest, and how her multiverse-monitoring probability algorithm was something he had to tweak twenty thousand times.

You compliment him about the design of the watch, he's like

_-_ 'I still have the protypes.' And he's ready to show you different ones, different shapes and materials he considered using, but eventually ruled out through experiments and tests

AND DON'T GET HIM STARTED ON THEORIES OH GODDDD

You mention the words 'String Theory' or 'Time Dilation' around him and you will NEVER hear the end of it.

He has so many opinions on it he's never had the chance to share.

Ideas and theories about things like fourth dimensions, worm holes, black holes, and dozens of other theoretical scientific concepts.

I mean, he MADE time travel. He is an EXPERT in that stuff.

I would KILL to have a Time Travel Movie Marathon with Miguel.

Sitting on the couch and watching things like Back to the Future, and he describes what they got right, what would be impossible, how it could work in theory.

He probably talks through the whole movie, and picks each one apart. You watch Doctor Who and he WILL NOT SHUT UP.

He's probably AMAZIINNGG at math.

Like math IS science. It's the answer for science. So he's probably a natural master.

You can be like 'Miguel, What's 34% of 12,967?' - Without blinking he'd be like

_-_'...I'm guessing 4408, or something? I don't know, am I right? Ask Lyla, don't ask me.'

But you don't need to ask Lyla cause HE'S RIGHT

HISTORY TOO!

I mean... the man time-travels. I think he'd have at least a good grasp on history, and time periods. Thinks like ancient roman historians and how their thoughts effect modern science, and how certain events effected the flow of time throughout history.

I imagine he finds it so fascinating, seeing the vast differences that can span in universes, just from one small change. Maybe he even finds comfort in it, seeing how histories and stories have a natural flow in a way fiction can only hope to imitate.

I love me some Nerd!Miguel.

I wanna get in bed with Miguel and by that I mean I want to sit next to him as he sits in bed reading a book on the Theory of Relativity with reading spectacles and a mug of sleepytime tea okay

A Miguel who runs up to his partner like 'Read this,' and he's all proud as he hands you a notepad full of numbers. But to him it's a formula he's been working WEEKS on, one that'll make Lyla run smoother, and everything much easier and he wants you to think he's cool for it

A Miguel who spends date nights watching NatGeo documentaries for fun

NERDY NERD MIGUEL DORKY MILD NERDY MIGUEL

[livvy-fallen]

To add from my last post. (I'm so sorry it took so long:( I'm trying my best to get it to you guys as soon as possible)

Yandere obey me when MC goes to the past

I'm so sorry it took a while. It got deleted as my cousin was messing around and then it wouldn't save .

Warning! This fic contains: blood, yandere stuff, cannibalism and maybe dead dove no clue! But it has disturbing subjects matters

You have been warned

People say rose tinted glasses make red flags look like just normal flags... And now your wondering how many glasses you owed.

You never really thought about how the brothers habits we're.... Let's say a red flag parade.But now you wish you realized you need to disappear and put Houdini to Shame. At first it was nothing big. A few comments from Mammon. Nothing you couldn't handle.

"Hey! Don't be going out ! I'm your first you should be spending time with me!...be grateful that The great Mammon wants to spend time with ya!"

And

"Your just asking for any lower demon to just take ya! "

Then your stuff keept on going missing. It probably wasn't just that stupid, greedy demon who was doing so but he differently was in first place for it!

Then you noticed your few friends from RAD are gone... Like that really nice succubus you were friends with. She was so nice to you always there to help you with anything. You never saw again after you said you were hanging out with her to the brothers! You were the last person to see her alive. You had to hold her funeral. You could bearly keep it together at said funeral. You never cried so hard.

You still keep a picture of her and your friend group hidden in your room. You know dam well if the brothers find it.... You don't want to think about it..

Now you wish you never made that STUPID pact with him or any of them! You couldn't of even go outside without them trying to drag you back in!

Then you saw Mammon killing one of your few friends left... The way their blood dripping making a horrible wet sound as it hit the floor. The way you could see the blood drip out of his mouth! The way he had a stupid grin on his face! You saw the poor demons insides put on display.... The poor demon was still alive! And they looked so scared... You don't blame them...... The way their life was ended by one loud stomp! And you saw the blood splatter every in a certain distance. You threw up.. Like a large amount of throw up... It didn't help you saw that bastards hand grab something.... You don't want to know what. But you then... You heard a loud chomp. And him sallowing...... You saw the insides dangling out of his mouth.... The blood still dripping.. ...

It's been.... You don't even remember..... Since then...

"I'm sorry but you made me do it. Now you have a ugly scar on your once beautiful face... But I still love you!"

You still have have a scar from trying to escape amso....its not even that noticeable from far way but he won't let you live it down! You hate all of those 7 fuckers!

You tried everything! You even used your pacts.. You managed to get away for 2 weeks and back to the human realm before Lucifer found you... You don't even know how! You dyed your hair,changed your name! you changed everything... But you think the pact is way too strong of that....

You took away to many showers after you got brought back.. You still have nightmares about it but you rather die a horrible death then tell them that..you wish that you stayed dead!

So when you got brought back to the past you were actually happy... Because they don't even remember you!! Meaning no more yandere!! You gladly took that deal and ran with it..

However the brothers didn't take it so well.... You escaped their grasp and this time they have no way getting you back!

Lucifer

He is pissed. Not only did he lose his darling. That shady wizard bitch is getting to be all yours! His anger wasn't obvious at first glance due to his pride. But if you look closely you can see how he is inraged. His coal black wings were puffed out like an upset cat. Last time he was this angry he ended up with Satan. He looking for anything that can get you back. And once you do come back he's never letting you out of his sight again. If your able to walk after you go back it's a miracle. All though the Demonus companies are really thankful. They haven't seen so much profit in the start of its production! But at the same time he feels like a failure of an oldest brother. He isn't there for his baby siblings. He feels like a failure of his family. He's watching his siblings ruin themselves. He needs to be strong for them... But he just can't bare the pain of you no longer there. The pain of knowing dam well that you could be hurting and no one is there to wipe away your tears and to pick you up. Just like how you did with his family

Mammon

Oh boy... Where do I start? He is absolutely devastated! His Human, treasure his everything is gone and probably in danger! And you just want him to except that?! (Yes. Yes we do) if he can do anything he will! If Solomon comes back with a single scratch on your perfect body he is going to regret the day his mother had to give birth to him. Mammon is using EVERY connection he has to see if they can help. Before they knew you were in the past he was the first one out the door looking for you. And we all know he isn't going to make the same mistake again. I hope you enjoyed going to the bathroom alone. Because when you get back you NOT having that again. He also is picking up the slack because of Lucifer. Mammon is the second oldest and he CAN NOT deal with the image of his siblings in pain. He cares for them. So even if gets insulted, hit and hissed at by his brothers he doesn't care as long as they aren't upset as much.

Leviathan

He's not very happy. Is all I can really say? But because of his crippling self worth issues he's saying stuff like "of course they wouldn't want to be around a yucky otaku like me" and similar stuff.. It's a little depressive. But don't be fooled if you think he isn't lashing out at everything. He nearly damaged his figures in a fit of rage once. If that doesn't show how upset he is then what does? He is the general of hell's Navy so one wrong comment from a lower demon and their swimming with Lotan

Satan

Avatar of wrath so you can guess how he is dealing with this.. Not very fucking well. He has destroyed so much of the devildom it's common practice for demons to be jumping over creators just to go to school. His room is worse for wear. It looks like a war happened in there. He is reading every single book he can about this subject so he can get you back faster but every dead end only leads to a ruined building. However most of his wrath also steams from the fact he knows how he was back then. He's worried that he will hurt you. All though he harsh with punishments he isn't very found of the idea of you getting killed by his wrath

Asmo

Asmo isn't recognizable. At all. His hair is greasy from not showering or bathing for long times.. His eyes red and puffy for crying his eyes out, lips cracked from not drinking water. He spends most of his time sleeping. He didn't get how belphi could sleep all the time but now he does. All mirrors are broken in the house. He couldn't stand seeing himself in the mirror. Not only are you gone ( he thinks your scared without them and crying without them to which your definitely not. You celebrated the second you were free) but so is Solomon! And no one other then him is there for you! That Shady sorcerer.. What if you get a scar! What if you don't drink water? (The call is coming from inside the house I swear-) what if a stupid lust demon tries to take you?! Their scent on you definitely is gone by now! He has his good days though! If he realized that you could be back soon he has to look the best! So he washed his hair and everything else, did a face mask his daily routine and put a lot of chap stick on. Just in case you're back at that day! It usually lasts for a week until he gets upset.

Beelzebub

Beel is trying to keep his family together. He's trying his very best. But he just can't always do so. He's the protector of this family. He always has been but he doesn't feel like he should anymore.. After all not only did he failed to protect Lilith. He couldn't even protect you! He I'd having nightmares after nightmares about his failures of not protecting his family to the point belphegor often goes to his beloved twin's dreams to try to put a good dream in his mind. His appetite is all over the place! One day he eats everything like normal then the next day he can't actually eat anything. It worries his other siblings. Another thing is he keeps food for you just in case you're back. He has no clue if your eating correctly! Your way from the people who protect you. Your probably so scared! (Your really not-) so he keeps food he just in case for you. No one is allowed to throw it away though... So when or IF you come back ignore the moldy rotten food. You know during the early lessons while belphi was in the attic? It's like that. Demons are pact animals pretty much and beel is the biggest family man know to man. So he was destroyed and don't get me started how he feels thinking that if he was just there with you, you would be safe and there with them. You know when you called for Beelzebub in the past because of the apples he felt that but not 100% . He felt you call for him to help you. He didn't know if he actually did in the past. He has no clue if you got hurt because HE wasn't there for you. He wasn't there to pick you up and save you

Belphegor

He is PISSED to say the least. Not only did you get out if their grasp there's no guarantee that your coming back let alone safe! The one day they let you lock yourself in your room and didn't join you is the time you were taken away by someone. That is NEVER happing again. Hope you enjoyed having a door because that is coming straight off. His sleep schedule is so off wack. One day he sleeps for 23 hours and only getting up because Beel is making him eat. Beel be dammed if he loses another loved one. But the next 3 days he isn't sleeping. He is only sleeping when beel put sleeping pills in his food. Belphi is now never leaving Beel's side. Not like Beel was letting him leave longer than 30 minutes. Belphi isn't very found of the idea that your in the past for MANY reasons but one main one is because the simple fact. You went to the past where Lilith's death was fresh. His hate for humans were so strong. He already killed you once he doesn't want to lose you again.

While all this is happening your living the life that the brothers ripped away from you. So when your looking for books about Nightbringer and when Mammon freaks out... All you get are flashbacks. You feel the pain of the brothers keeping your away from everything and everyone. The pain of knowing if you left the family alone you wouldn't of been hurting... You wouldn't of had to buried your friends bodies... You wouldn't of had to cry at a locked door begging to be let out. Only for an hour in the human realm... You missed your family... All that comes back and you can't hold it anymore. You sob your eyes out. Your crying on the floor as everyone fights... Because you know if you stay any longer it will happen again.. "To hell to this family! FUCK THIS FAMILY! LET THEM DEAL WITH THEIR OWN SHIT!" Is what your mind is yelling at you as you hold your arm. This family will be the death of you... Not like they will let you die...

[gz-missfit]

So I wanna talk about tazercraft cause their characters are so incredibly interesting to me in the best way possible. To preface this I don't speak a word of Portuguese (I'm learning tho! And have been picking up on sentences a lot more) and my native language isn't English so I may get some things wrong and if I do feel free to correct me!

More under the cut:

I'll put this in 3 separate parts, them individually and then their dynamic!

Mike:

Mike is interesting to me, he's definitely the outward instigator of the 2 when it comes to causing trouble and as many have already pointed out the brains behind a lot of it! He's managed to master the create mod in ways I genuinely never expected them to be used and it's a cute way to say that mine (his wife) was also a cause of that as the goddess of creation. To move to his personality more he's definitely the lead talker in the duo, he's a lot more confident in his voice and speaking in comparison to Pac and can often seem like the lead of the duo, tho this is the cause for people missing his weaknesses! Mike is not a fighter, far from that actually, he freezes in danger and fumbles. His hand tremble when he holds a sword and sees mobs closing in and when big threats appear his whole body turns into ice. He gets overstimulated by danger he couldn't prepare for or was the cause of. Just to name 2 examples here, the first is in the dungeon on the day the timer ran out you could hear him panic, he was a lot more shaky and especially his sword being the cause of injuries to his friends is what made that worse, it went so far that he even typed in chat that he was overwhelmed (fun fact to note is that through all of that he basically vanished from pacs pov but I'll get to that). Another example is when the code showed up to him and pac to drop Richas cow head to them, he later on explicitly state having frozen in fear to i think Fit if i remember correctly and even when ttt was typed in the chat and pac had jumped down to follow Richas to make sure he could teleport Mike was again, nowhere to be seen.

His fear of a fight that revolves around his family and death especially is so interesting to me cause it's obvious that a lot of that comes from Richas first death and how he still blames himself for it, the fear of failing his loved ones again being set deep into his bones whenever a danger for their lives comes up. This is why the prison stream actually was even more interesting to me than I initially expected, because his personality in that sense took a complete 180! Now it's been shown time and time again that Mike has an intense distaste of the federation and hasn't been fond of them for a long time, he's incredibly hostile to them and not scared at all when threatened by them to the point where it's a game for him and he's retaliated with threats that could lead to a ban for him multiple times. Before I move on I think the reason as to why this is is because the federation never showed to kill or take lives, I think that's why Mike has a lot more confidence in confronting them rather than things that have shown to be fatal with all intention of killing. Back to the prison though, Mike's personality to threats definitely took a turn in there, from the moment we saw him he looked pissed beyond believe and his tone was always threatening and almost mocking, his mind quickly was set on getting him and pac out as soon as possible and the realization that Walter Bob, someone who both have seen be the first federation worker that showed them kindness and an interest in what they do after willingly showing up for a haircut is what devastated him. Mike sees Walter as a close friend due to that and it showed because as soon as the realization of Walters long term treatment hit him he did everything to protect the worker he maybe met a handful of times, you could see him get more and more agitated the more the guards hit him and ironically enough I think if Walter hadn't been there idk if he would've killed the guard, but he was so set on finally setting Walter free as well as make sure Pac doesn't have to relive the past they shared that he was willing to do everything to get those 3 out and that all is perfectly encapsulated by his behavior once Walter got taken again, Mike wasn't sad or distraught like Pac was, no, he was fucking fuming to the point where he didn't respond to Pac. Ya know, the person he talks to 24/7 and that's attached to his hip to the point where most of their words are shared telepathically above all. It was obvious that he was angry beyond believe and I'm sure he's got a lot more plans up his sleeve now to get revenge. Cause if there's one thing about Mike it's definitely that you do not want him as your enemy. He may be an outwardly social guy who is definitely more focused on making people laugh and showing off the things he and Pac created but he's still a fugitive and would destroy the world for those he holds dear as they help him feel stronger in the moments where fear does get the better of him.

Pac:

Pac is honestly incredibly fascinating just due to how many levels his character has. He's outwardly the person that appears more shy in comparison to Mike and stumbles as well as gets flustered quick. This has also been the main cause of people seeing him as a weaker player (which also got added onto by how during the earlier days he'd be the one to die a lot) which in turn has caused an interesting dynamic between him and a bunch of the others players because he's far from that. Pac is full on the brawns when it comes to situations that mean fighting for someone's life, his brain goes into focus mode once a life is on the line and there's many examples to show that! Which is why I find it so funny that he often gets handed things due to seeming and behaving weaker than he actually is (main example here being etoiles who not only gave him a custom diamond sword early on which Pac has kept to this day but also the Scythe which he nowadays uses as his only weapon).

Now to the examples of how he can very much carry his own weight In fights and how fascinating it is to watch him, the first big show of him effortlessly carrying himself and doing his best to support others was during the timer dungeon, he was at the front with Bad,Etoiles and Cellbit and even when a lot less geared than those 3 with a weapon that did a lot less damage he didn't go down once even tho he wasn't even holding a totem at any point. It's genuinely impressive with how well he carried himself through that and used movement to attack big groups of mobs from behind only to have vanished out of their sight again before they could corner him. The only time he got truly cornered was at a point where even Etoiles had to back up a little and ended up next to him and the way Pac casually mentioned being fine only to instantly jump at the opportunity of humor through small talk sticks in my brain to this day due to him having stayed mainly silent the whole time before that. The 2 other examples are about Richas and how quick Pac is to defend his son, like I mentioned before when the Code showed up to him, Mike and Richas, Pac instantly jumped into aggressive, he wanted to hit it but fell due to underestimating the jump and as soon as he laid eyes in Richas he became Pacs priority sticking to his sons side until he was Tp'd away and only then returning to the Platform. The same thing happened during the dinner! Every parent except for him crashed when the codes revealed themselves and as much as Richas was quick to start running the speed at which Pac laid eyes on the egg and started to follow right next to him was genuinely mind blowing, he stood at that elevator once Richas left ready to die if it came to it just to make sure one of those things didn't follow him, and as soon as Mike relogged he became Pacs priority with the latter hovering around him will he was loading in.

Now to compare this to the behavior in prison is interesting. Pacs still as good as ever when it comes to putting on a persona to get what he wants but I do believe that the prison brought up a lot of trauma for him, from what I know his time in prison was a lot worse than Mike's and you could hear that through his voice throughout the whole stream. Pacs a physical fighter not a mental one. But in the end he still has that survival instinct, he still knows he needs to get out to protect his family and he doesn't want to be separated from his other half and best friend anymore so he plays sly. The way he stole the keys from the guard genuinely is the most slick maneuver ever and his ability to portrait his behavior in an exaggerated way that makes him seem like no threat at all has worked in his favor multiple times during this too. He was definitely suffering through that whole experience but his determination to protect the ones he loved still slipped through, his hesitancy when he called to the guards not to hit his friends only to have his voice go small once he was physically threatened. He's not at all comfortable when he doesn't have anything to fight back with. Pacs underestimated A LOT, he let's himself be pushed around for bits with a smile and definitely enjoys appearing a bit dumber and less skilled than he is just due to the perks of it and not really caring for bragging about fighting skills when he'd rather show off the project he and Mike have spent time on, only those with a keen eye can see how he's got the heart of a fighter (Etoiles being the first to vocally call this out) he's not weak by any means and definitely a lot smarter than he'd ever admit. He'd die to protect his family and the ones he cares about and would never back down if push came to shove for them.

To sum this all up and not make this too long (which it already is pfff) for both of them together their dynamic is very clearly the "do not separate" but funnily enough Mike is the one who definitely leans onto that more. During each fight where he panicked, got overwhelmed and/or froze he was missing from Pacs pov, they were split apart and it was Mike who was terrified of not being able to hold his own, the same happened in the prison just differently. In the prison Mike definitely put on a cold facade but it broke everytime he asked if they could share the same cell, the underlying fear of him having to fight alone lacing his words through moments like that. This doesn't mean that Pac isn't the same tho! He's just less outwardly vocal about it in comparison and shows it more through actions and looks. It was obvious to hear his distress when he called Mike's name in prison but his constant turning around to see where the other is and his hesitancy to go into areas that implied separation are what showed how hes just as scared as Mike is about loosing the other.

To go more into headcanon and theories I'd like to think of the 2 as 2 hearts and a shared soul, their telepathic communication is borderline Canon at this point and it's obvious that the thought or implications of being separated doesn't sit well at all with either of them. Their bodies and life's are separate but they're still connected by a soul. And whether that's shown through jokes like not being able to be in one spot without the other or through genuine things like Mike having to remind Pac that only he can hear him unless he uses his voice or their ability to flawlessly work around the other is up to interpretation of each viewer in my opinion but there's something to be said about the fact that without the other they'd never had the determination or confidence to get out of that prison, that without the other their weaknesses would show a lot more and end up causing a lot bigger of a struggle than they currently are. Without the other they wouldn't feel whole.

[yeonslayjun]

Dumb and Dumber - Hualian

Hua Cheng and Xie Lian are so OBVIOUS and OBLIVIOUS at the same time Honestly They amaze me ngl

Cuz Hua Cheng be Like - Wdym Gege Loves me?? That's impossible like I don't think he loves me solely for the fact that I'm one of his last believer left and that I built a FUCKING CITY for him and how I ran helped him in a case and dressed up as a Groom and gege was a bride (Oh his dead heart definitely started beating then pls ) and how I Built a temple to worship him and how I released 3000 lanterns for him and that I've made 10,000 statues for gege and not how I have red thread of fate on my finger bc he tied his hair on my finger

ALSO wdym I had my gay awakening at the land of tender??? Impossible He's my god I can't have those feelings for him bc I'm a dirty piece of shit (NO YOU ARE NOT)

and DEFINITELY NOT HOW I GAVE HIM Spirtual Power... DEFINITELY NOT HAHAHA.... Now let me just ask his hand for marriage OH nvm I'm unworthy he doesn't like me ( WHILE XIE LIAN IS SITTING ON HIS LAP ) let's make it into a joke hahaha..... OH? Gege's says he's happy for my beloved when will he know it's him talking about?? :( ( let's ignore he didn't know half of these lmao)

OH MY GOD GEGE SAW THE STATUES That's it I'm getting disowned by him He'll hate me ofc he will... I knew this would happen no I'm okay, IT'S FINE... Yeah he really should make it clear that he doesn't love me huh? :((

Like Hua Cheng is SO DOWN BAD for Xie Lian Like Honey we get it You exist to LOVE your Taizi Danxia and to serve Cvnt and angst

AND

My guy Xie Lian here is SO VERY OBLIVIOUS like I get that he was practicing abstinence but bro's like -

Oh Hua Cheng is such a pretty name *giggles* Oh and his hands were so beautiful and he was gentle with me too when he dressed as the Groom *blushes* Oh Crimson Rain Sought Flower is his name? *swoons* HOLY SHIT HE'S HOT *nosebleeds*

I like this kid san lang. OoO Did he just suck the poison out of me?!?! DAYUM he killed so many people at once *swoons x2*... WAIT IS HE HUA CHENG??!?! Oh my gosh IT IS Hua Cheng ajhsjdhsudhu Let's act calm and composed hehe. Let's sleep together cuz He would never hurt me >:( I wonder what happened to the kid who said he'd worship only me :( He was a good kid yk? Had one eye covered too kinda like you actually haha Funny Right???

He's so perfect as a "sworn brother" ( Yes I'm looking at you SQX) protecting me and shit. Wait he trusts me??? ME?!?! huh?!?!. San Lang~~~. AHHH HE RELEASED 3000 LANTERNS FOR ME AHHHH I LOVE HIM as a friend ofc ofc.

Oh I LOVE getting Spiritual Energy from him <3 that wasn't a kiss nope it wasn't.... ERROR 101 San Lang asked my hand in marriage ERROR.... o h He was Joking :( ofc he was :((( I wish he wasn't tho :((((( SAN LANG HAS A BELOVED?!?!? Ofc he has He's such a handsome and kind man he probably gets all the bitches he wants But why do I feel smth weird in my heart?? (IT'S CALLED JEALOUSY YOU DUMB MOTHOFO )

Honestly God (Jun Wu LMAO) Knows how he survived the past 800 years like BRO WHY IS YOU SO STUPID when it comes to love?!?!? Like ISTG He's one of the smartest of all the jokes called "GODS". But he still doesn't get it till he saw the 10,000 statues Hua Cheng prepared like pls

ALSO Hua Cheng the ghost king who defeated 33 gods and how his smartass self esp rubbed the floor with them Civil Heavenly Officials But the one moment he needs it to realise the VERY OBVIOUS FACT that Xie Lian loves him The Genius Smartass is nowhere to be seen

But tbh I can't blame Hua Cheng much here cuz Xie Lian was very oblivious to his own feelings pls BUT STILL

Their Slow-burn was too much for me Like the chemistry was SO OBVIOUS but they're just Dumb kids when it comes to feelings *sighs* The Hualian Brainrot is rotting my brain away as we peak

[rainybubbles]

When COD men realize their crush on you

Ghost, Soap, Price, Gaz, Alejandro

Part 1 if you want more context to understand

G H O S T

Remind : you're a cashier and a strange man came every day at 2AM to buy ropes.

-After questioning if this masked man was here to hurt you or just to do some things with the ropes he bought, you have started a staring contest with him.

-Which was a bad idea because he didn't blink.

-At all.

-Which was scary.

-But you acknowledged your defeats, each time, by letting your employee discount to him on the ropes.

-It's not like you'll need one.

-Isn't it ?

-It was entertaining for the both of you, this little challenge when he was entering in the shop, and the small talk when he made his purchase.

-(It was more him nodding while you said "hi" but...yeah it's a talk.)

-But what is worse than one client buying rope and scissors at 2 am ?

-Two clients doing it.

-An another man did the same thing but with some knives and ropes.

-The first thing that came to your mind was "what is going on in this fucking town ?"

-And...

-"Sir, is there any bondage club you go with this guy ?"

-...yeah.

-It was the only solution to buy this much ropes.

-Or maybe he was his twin ?

-But the only answer Ghost gave you was a frown of his eyebrows.

-He seemed a little worried.

-You laughed trying to clear up the mood because it was clear your joke wasn't funny to him at all.

-And...

-Ghost disappeared.

-Guess he's not scared about killing people or doing stare contest with you but a bad joke could make him run away.

-Damn, you felt like you were back to 12 during school where just being yourself felt like a burn.

-You fucked up the only thing that distracted you a little.

-But Y/N remind the other guy ?

-Yeah knives one.

-He...-Unlike Ghost he gave you bad chills.

-He was smiling at you, asking you personal questions that feels too personal.

-Such as your hand size or even if you have good relationship with your family.

-You tried being professional, ignoring him.

-But slowly you had the impression he was everywhere you go.

-So...you quit.

-And you found a job in a pet shop.

-It was okay.

-That was the problem.

-It was okay.

-And not...weird or fun like your little meetings with Ghost were.

-One morning while you started your shift, you saw on the checkout 2kg of rat poison.

-You stared the thing because how many cold cases did you have seen with this poison ?

-You looked up slowly and...

-"Fuck Sir. I don't know if I should worry about you or me at this point"

-"Good to see you again, Y/N" Ghost said.

-You smiled.

-"Yeah. Good to see you again too."

-You didn't know what to say, so you let him pay.

-But when your shift ended, you saw a figure with a mask.

-"So you're here to wait for your victim, or are you so impatient to see me again ?"

-"Who said you're not my victim ?"

-"...my mom"

-"I didn't meet her."

-"Me too and well, now we have a common point so you can't kill me."

-"That-" he sighed."That's not how it works you know ?"

-"It seems to work for me, I'm still breathing."

-"...you're a case Y/N."

-"I know, I mean it seems like men with an obsession rope are attracted to me. "

-"Men ?" he repeated, hearing the plural.

-"Yeah the other guy he...he was kind of a creep. That's why I'm here now. "

-He seemed to think about it.

-"Do you want me to go home with you ?", he asked, worry to let you alone.

-"That's sound creepy you know."

-"That's why I ask, if you don't want to, I'm leaving."

-You stared at him.

-"I...I would love to but-"

-"I understand." he said cutting you

-"Wait, let me finish. I would love to but actually I'm fucking hungry so I don't plan to go home. I want to buy some food."

-"Okay."

-"But Thursday I'm free if you know, you want to become my personal bodyguard and disappear again mysteriously."

-He nodded.

-He didn't know how he felt about you.

-But one thing was sure, when he was at the base he was searching for one thing : your eyes.

-And just this tells him it was to late to step back.

S O A P :

-So after complimenting your father's ass in French, he ended up to ask you if you could teach him

French.

-But you're not a charity.

-So you said that if he wanted some French lessons, he had to give you something.

-In reality you just think about some food, like his dessert because the military food was not the best except the biscuits.

-But he proposed some anecdotes.

-About his team.

-Each lesson will be about one secret about the 141.

-You could have said, "no, Soap, it's too private and we're professional."

-Yeah.

-But you're Y/N.

-A human.

-Who loves gossips.

-So you accepted.

-And slowly every night after you taught him French, you learned how Price ended up in underwear on a roof in Siberia, or how Ghost almost married a grandma accidentally during an infiltration, or Gaz became bald when he tried bleaching his hair.

-It was cozy.

-Those nights were the best.

-You were chatting next to a fire, while the Scottish man was narrating you with his accent and gestures his stories.

-You had this impression to be in those teen movies where the guy seduces the main character with his guitar on the beach near to a camp fire.

-Except that you were on a military basis, with Ghost checking you (or intimidating you, you couldn’t tell).

-And the only music was Price's snore and some soldiers farts.

-Which by the way could awaking a dead.

-Yeah, it was fun for the both of you.

-Until the sounds of your laugh were replaced by the silence.

-You were only a translator.

-And your mission was done.

-So you left.

-And Soap turned out to be alone again during those nights.

-He's not alone in fact.

-The 141 is here.

-But he feels lonesome.

-During his insomnias he could find you and pretend he had one more story he had absolutely to tell you, while in reality he just wanted to hear your laugh to feel this...this peace. But you’re not here anymore.

-Hearing you was like....like peace, yeah. He didn't have any other words to describe it.

-"I should call them, isn't it ?" he murmured to himself.

-"If you don't. I'll kill them. Nobody alive should know about Giselle." Ghost answered.

-Soap smiled.

-"You just say that because you miss them too L.T. "

-Yeah, he should definitely call you.

P R I C E :

-A child.

-It was a child they saved during a mission and that you had patched up, he looked at him and-

-"You suck at being nice with them. I'm going marrying them before you."

-Price blinked his eyes.

-"Someone seems to have competition here." Gaz joked.

-Price just stared the kid.

-His first thought was "Language, kid."

-And...

-Was he so obvious ?

-He knew he had something for you.

-He's not that stubborn to deny an attraction.

-But he also knew that involving someone in his life will be complicated.

-So he didn't do anything to show his feelings.

-But it seems that even an unknown 8y.o kid could tell he likes you.

-"You know what kid ? Yeah I suck at this. But even if I did, just see them smile at me is enough to highlight my day."

-The little boy was surprised at this confession.

-"I could help you, I mean....I got my best friends wedded at school, so I'm kinda a love expert." he said self-confident.

-"Is that so ?" Price smiled, amused by him

-"Yeah. The first thing is giving a gift. Thomas, my best friend he gave Leo some Pokemon cards and he had a hug. Maybe if you do the same, Y/N will hug you."

-Gaz and Soap laughed their ass off as the kid continues listing his techniques.

-But...the next day you found at your office some Pokemon cards.

-And chocolates.

-With a little note.

-Maybe Price should let himself expressing as openly his feelings as this kid express honestly his thoughts.

(even though the Pokemon cards were not his, Soap and Gaz just found it funny to put them when they saw the chocolates)

G A Z

-After your kiss undercover, you didn't see each other.

-You didn't talk about it even if you both had dreams about it.

-And time passed.

-And on this Tuesday morning while you were chatting with your neighbor, because you finally came back home, she decided to set you up on a blind date.

-Telling she had a wonderful grandson, kind, nice and-

-You said yes.

-And you regretted it.

-Because her grandson was undoubtedly the stereotype of the "nice guy" who complained how nobody loves a nice guy nowadays.

-You tried giving him a chance, but the longer the dinner went, the longer you wanted to strangle him or beat him up between the cookies and the turkey.

-"I think they had to leave, sir," a voice said.

-Your date frowned his brows.

-"No I don't think so, we're only at the starter !" he answered to the waiter.

-You didn't listen.

-Your eyes were glued to the said waiter who was none other that Gaz himself.

-"I promised you; we have a call by their mother. They have to go at the hospital, so please stop shouting."

-"I DIDN'T SCREAM, AND I'M SURE YOU'RE LYING BECAUSE YOU'RE A JEALOUS -ASSHOLE. THEIR MOTHER COULD WAIT, WE'RE HAVING A FUCKING DATE"

-Well.

-Remember the turkey.

-He ate it.

-By his nose.

-You stood up and punched him.

-"Fucking finally, I don't hear your shitty thoughts anymore." you sighed of relief.

-Gaz smirked while you both left the restaurant.

-"I guess it's a mission?," you asked.

-"Yes, we tried to contact you, but you didn't answer."

-"He took my phone saying "it's only us", kinda romantic at first until he starts speaking."

-"He didn't want you to runaway." Gaz realized.

-"Scary."

-He nodded.

-You walked with him at the car waiting for you with your baggages already there.

-"I'm surprised you didn't make any jokes about the turkey.", you asked.

-"Because I was too concentrated on the fact that I was kinda relieved, your date was..."

-"Shitty? Horrible? Terrible?"

-"I would say, "not good", but yeah," he admitted.

-"Want to take me on a good date then, Garrick ?" you asked with a smirk.

-"Yeah. But no kiss at the first date, sorry Y/N.", he joked

-"Too bad we already kiss then." you answered with the same irony.

-"Yeah it seems we have to kiss again on the first date.",

-"Wow that's so terrible, I don't know if I could survive."

-"Wait after the mission to know."

-"Just don't bring a turkey." you said.

-"Promise, I don't."

-He did it, he brought a fucking turkey.

-And he asked Price how to cook one, just to mock you during your date.

A L E J A N D R O :

-Through reports.

-After you put microphones on him, the mission ended. And you had to complete the list of what you had used, how did it worked, in order to help the company to improve the equipment and the gear.

-Little do you know this report also went to Alejandro's desk, who saw the occasion to thank you for your hard work.

-You replied with a note, saying it was your job.

-He answered you could have said no and...

-Every mission you had together ended up with some exchanges through your reports.

-But only through papers...

-Because when you were seeing him on the base, you were unable to put words without stuttering, or even talking to him like a human being. Too anxious to approach him.

-And it was okay.

-You had a friendship with the Alejandro Vargas that you had seen in a bunny outfit, and it was perfectly okay.

-Yeah.

-But your brain decided to make up some scenarios.

-You were already attracted to him.

-He's gorgeous.

-But now you knew him a little bit more.

-And you were fucked.

-That's why on the last report. You decided to imitate your dad : you ran away and bought milk.

-Cut everything to put some distance.

-You accepted a mission on another basis and...

-And that's how you were supposed to stop feeling this sparkle about him.

-But you didn't.

-And now it was too late to try to even pursue your friendship with him with what you had done.

-"I fucked up," you whispered to yourself while you were listening to a military audio you had to write down.

-"Well, if it's not our favorite technician," a raspy voice said suddenly to your ears.

-Awoop.

-Jumpscare.

-You felt down and looked up to see the 141, Alejandro and Rudy.

-"What the fuck is happening, why are you in France-"

-"We worked with this unit. We have an enemy in common who is helping the cartel. After we had all we want, Alejandro will interrogate him to have information about the relationship they had with the cartel." Lasswell explained.

-You nodded.

-You didn't know what else you could do.

-Until you felt something on your wrist.

-' Mind if we talk, cielo ?"

-Yes.

-But you just nodded again and followed him, ready to be eaten up alive.

-"Listen Alejandro; I didn't want to be an asshole, I fucked up and-"

-He interrupted you.

-"Calmos. You had your reasons. and-"

-"And there was no reason, I was just scared." you interrupted him.

-"Scared ?" he asked.

-"Yes, I...I had a crush on you. And all the crushes I had didn't end well. I mean the last one dies, before he had a fiancé, before this before they used me to make jealous his ex and before this before and this before he said I was only a 4/10 and-"

-"They're just fucking pendejos."

-"Except the one who dies." you corrected him

-"Except the one who dies, I guess. But it's not because it happened, that it will be like that again."

-"Please Alejandro, you're like...Like a main character of a badass series. And I'm..."

-"The main character of a badass series too, cielo. I wanted to ask you on a date since day one. Rudy stops me because you were a civilian."

-"I work with military every day."

-"I know, but I have to make sure you knew the life we lived if we start a relationship. I wanted to know you before starting something."

-"And when I ran away, you-"

-"I had bought roses to ask you on a date, the day you left."

-"...fuck." you said realizing the consequences of your actions

-He laughed.

-"Yeah you can say that. But I was sure that if you did something like this, it was probably because you thought about it."

-"Well, surprise I'm not clever. I'm just a wimp."

-"We called that un gallina."

-"Well a gallina, then. I'm sorry for the roses, the reports and everything really."

-"You could make it up, if you accept the roses, cielo, you know ?."

-You opened your eyes wide.

-"Wait you-"

-"When I like someone, it's with my whole heart, cielo. So yes, I still want a date."

-"...how am I this lucky?"

-" I could say the same."

-You laughed.

-"Yeah, I- Yes I would love a date with you Alejandro."

Sorry for the mistakes, English and Spanish are not my mother tongue :(!

If you want more : my masterlist

[crimison-sun]

Hello I'm going to rant about a theory about Sylus possible myth story, it will obviously have spoilers on Sylus story and character, and also some light spoilers on the boys myths so beware

I noticed how everyone myth had something to do with getting married or talking about marriage, the closest one to achieve that goal was Rafayel but his married life didn't lasted much lol

But yeah that's a theory, a game theory I'm going insane

I think that for Sylus myth it would be different, I think him and the MC were actually normal people living a normal married life. From how he would hold MC hand in the story whenever he was angry or maybe scared for her at the start of the story (?) he always reached for her hand as if he had done that many times before, plus how angry he was for MC evol not resonating with him but with other guys yes?! He was angry and if my theory is right because he wants his wife back, her memories to come back and to resonate with him in every way like once upon a time. Plus all the "we are the same" as if saying I know you boo. Now since we're talking about love and deepspace of course every boy has to suffer lol, I believe in his myth Sylus may have killed MC or have been a cause that led to her death, from the scene he was so okay with MC killing him with the pistol and also the voices telling MC to consume him and that's he's hers? Yeah that's totally not couple behavior. And I also want to add how in the card where he's with his shirt up, I got it bc I don't know he wants me what can I say, the way she dreams dreads of him getting injured? The way he ask which tie suit him best? The way he lets his wifey dress him however she wants even if possible making wear all red?? Yeah.

Edit: important update of my delulu, I saw this video on insta

https://www.instagram.com/reel/C9dNyhRIdx9/?igsh=MXN1dThla3k0bXY1Ng==

And listen, he and MC were planning to have a baby, idgaf you can't pry away this thought of my mind of him and MC decorating a nursery meanwhile he sings this song and MC "the baby is going to love your voice!" PLEASE EVEN IF MY THEORY ISN'T RIGHT I STILL TAKE IT AS A HEADCANON BECAUSE IT'S SO SWEET. HE WANTS HER TO REMEMBER SO BAD AND HE'S DOING HIS HATRDEST BUY SOMETHING IT'S KEEPING HIM BACK OH MY GOD MY BABY

[genericpuff]

What the actual fuck are they thinking-

Okay, the caption might seem overblown but... this is not good.

The main LO subreddit has been closed for weeks now. It closed due to the API protests but considering the options in the community poll were to either "stay open indefinitely" or "stay closed until the decision is reversed", there's a tinfoil hat theory going around that the single mod that overlooks that place saw the API protests as an "easy way out", especially considering how hands-off those mods are. By the time the main sub decided to take part in the protests (after the height of the protests were over) it had already been stated by u/spez that they were not going to reverse the decision. Essentially, the LO subreddit is done.

Do you know what's been happening since it closed? Activity in ULO has been skyrocketing, but we've also been seeing a lot more discourse from people who have been forced to stomach the ULO content after having their main community shuttered.

Listen, I've got a lot of issues with the main sub and the things they've done over the past year. There are definitely some really shitty folks in there who have ruined things for those who are just casual readers by just being way too protective of this comic. But that doesn't mean the main sub shouldn't exist. The main sub, as dead as it was by the time it closed, was still an option for people who didn't want blind praise or relentless criticism/shitposting. Though there were people who tried to gatekeep the shit out of the main sub (attempting to make it a "positive vibes only" space) the main sub was never explicitly designed for only praise, and by the time it closed, it was seeing a lot more balance between praise and criticism (to no one's surprise, because criticism has become a lot more mainstream in the LO fandom, simply due to the comic's undeniably tanking). All that said, it made for a nice middle ground. Even I enjoyed going in there and reading people's takes on new episodes every week, whether or not I agreed with them. ULO was not designed to be the only route for discussion concerning LO, it's very specifically run for one specific purpose and that purpose will not line up with those who are now without a space.

Without the main sub, there are people with nowhere to go. Some people casually grin and bear it through ULO, others have gone to /r/LowSodiumLoreOlympus, but considering how dead that sub is also, it's clear the popular opinion is swaying more towards criticism. I can't imagine what it's like to be a community refugee right now.

So what does that leave for those who don't want to use ULO? The Facebook groups, and the Discord. The Facebook groups are probably the most accessible communities - not everyone uses reddit, not everyone knows how to use Discord, but everyone uses Facebook.

So the fact that the Facebook groups aren't going on a small break, but are going on their own 4 month hiatus?

Not only does this further reduce the options for fandom interaction, but this is terrible for the comic. Hiatuses like this can kill long-term retention, and fandom communities are often the best way to keep that retention on some form of life support.

Think of it this way - if I didn't have the ULO community, I probably would have dropped off LO ages ago, cut my losses, moved on. But it's the fact that I have a community to keep in touch with and have fun with that keeps me on this series. This goes the other way as well, into the casual and praise communities - while I'm sure many will still eagerly return in October, for those who are more casual readers, Lore Olympus will essentially be out of sight, out of mind. And that is NOT something you want to happen to a comic that is already losing traction.

I genuinely do not know what Rachel is thinking closing these groups. And yes, I am pointing to Rachel on this decision because she literally runs the official LO Facebook groups. LO going on a mid-season hiatus over the summer when HALF OF HER DEMOGRAPHIC IS HOME FROM SCHOOL is already such a huge risk that will likely kill her numbers; but to go and cut off her official groups from being able to stay connected and talking about the comic during the hiatus, on a platform OCCUPIED BY THE OTHER HALF OF HER DEMOGRAPHIC, LITERALLY ADULT WOMEN ?? What is that supposed to achieve? If she wants to give her mods a break, sure, okay, do that for a few weeks, but four months? Is she so allergic to fans being able to theorize or "figure her out" (because god knows Rachel doesn't like being predictable) or, god forbid, is she worried about giving them too much "freedom" to reflect and discuss the comic during this time without the weekly dopamine distraction hits that they actually stop and realize how shitty the comic is right now?

All I can say is, as much as we're theorizing that LO is going to be getting a 4th season, I really do hope this midseason hiatus is its last. Whatever life this comic has left is being choked out by Rachel and Webtoons' own hands.

And when it does go out, it better go out with a bang. That's the least it can do for itself and its community at this point.

[ghostsandfools]

Gemini is so neurodivergent I don't know how nobody's talking about it.

OKAY, strap in, this one's gonna be long, and it's gonna be ranty, and I'm going to do it anyways.

Gemini is probably my favorite character... EVER. They are so perfect, I love them so much, I will die on this hill. They are the one constant for me. In this crazy, overly controversial fandom, in this crazy, overly controversial world, we all have one thing we can count on: Gemini. AND THEY GET SO LITTLE SCREENTIME! But that's not why I'm here.

So, almost everyone in TSBS has signs of some sort of mental illness or neurodivergency. This is not new. But I really wanna get into it with Gemini because I feel like nobody cares enough about them!

So, I'm going to split this up into parts. One for Pollux, one for Castor, and one for Gemini. Just to make it easier. LET'S GO!

Pollux:

So, Pollux. The first signs start to show with her when she was first introduced. She's hyper, she's unfocused, she's friendly, she's all over the place. These are very stereotypical, very basic signs of ADHD. HOWEVER, I actually DON'T think she has ADHD. I think she's just hyper sometimes. ADHD is much more that just being a little off the walls, it's a genuine disability that makes it difficult to focus or remember things, and I feel like if you dig deeper, that's not what's going on with her.

I do think that she's neurodivergent, however, in some capacity. Probably autism. I think her and Castor both have autism actually, but I'll get in to him later.

First of all, hyperactivity can also be a sign of autism. And while, when she first comes to Earth it seems as though she can't focus on any specific thing, I think that's because she's focused on Earth as a whole, explaining her interest in anything on Earth. I think learning about and exploring Earth might be one of her special interests, or maybe just exploring planets in general.

Now, the next point might just be due to technical issues, but maybe not. Pollux and Castor both have pretty blank faces, and don't have very many emotes. It may have just been a problem with their 3d modelling, so not the strongest point, but neurodivergent people and people on the spectrum often have difficulty with facial expressions, something I've also struggled with.

Pollux definitely has less neurodivergent coding than Castor does, but I think it's still there.

Castor:

Castor. I don't even know where to start with him.

When Castor was first introduced, he was very unexpressive and monotone, already a symptom of neurodivergency.

He also struggles socially, more so than Pollux. While Pollux was over-bearing, she had no trouble making friends once the chance arose. Castor, on the other hand, was perceived by most of the main cast as "creepy" or "rude", which hits closer to home than I want to admit.

But, over time, it becomes clearer and clearer that he only wants what's best. He doesn't intend to be terse, or rude, or weird, he's just never interacted with anyone that wasn't a star before.

Pollux seemed to adjust well to the environment on Earth once she learned more about the people there, but it seems Castor struggled a lot more with adapting in a new environment.

Castor is also a very private person. He has hobbies and emotions and thoughts, but he keeps them all to himself. Of course, after a while of spending time with Lunar, he starts to speak his mind more, which eventually led up to the last episode we saw him in where he yelled at Lunar for killing Eclipse. Still, I find it interesting that it took an extreme situation like that for him to finally speak his mind.

Gemini:

Gemini <3

Pollux and Castor work extraordinarily well together. They are THE siblings of all time, I love them.

I'm going to delve into headcanons for a minute here, but I feel like the other astrals don't like them very much. We never hear Gemini really talk about the other astrals, aside from basic details.

I feel like, after living with people for your entire life, your SIBLINGS, and those being the ONLY people you interacted with, you'd have some fond memories of them.

But they don't. And even now, there's tension between Gemini and the rest of the astrals. They clearly stand out. The other astrals seem to not take them seriously, and don't exactly listen to them. I feel like, from that recent scene from Taurus, maybe the other astrals, at least some of them, actively DISLIKE Gemini.

This may be why they're so unused to socially interacting on Earth. They probably spent very little time with their siblings, especially considering Nebula's existence. Maybe their siblings didn't visit them at all. That thought makes me sad.

Feeling outcasted is commonplace for neurodivergent people, as well as being perceived wrong.

Closing thoughts: Okay, I might be projecting here. I'm not sure. As someone who is neurodivergent, I identify with Gemini harder than any other fictional character. They're so special. I don't know if I'm picking up on subtext that isn't there, but if you have any thoughts, please share. I wanna know what you guys think.