#and more importantly than that

[quiet-longing]

because sometimes louis (and vampires) deserves nice things

Or: no, they really don't, but I'm giving it to them, anyway because it amuses me.

Iwtv is a painful fandom to be a part of, especially if you know what's coming and I think most people know, readers or not. The books have been out for years. There was a movie. The internet exists. What I'm saying is anyone coming into this fandom is probably someone who, by general cultural osmosis, knows what's up. Nobody's coming in blind. So, we all, to varying degrees, know how much it's gonna hurt us.

So after I brood about it (like the good Louis fan i am), I like to imagine a softer world for the characters. A world that's filled with small dramas instead of big ones and imagine them still being their ridiculous selves.

Now, think of this introduction to my soft vampire daydreams as a warm bath...

The premise is superficially the same minus the murdering and vampirism and it's a modern day human AU, so this Claudia has two dads and not a dad and an uncle and more importantly (not to Louis and Lestat; they would like their young, sweet daughter back; not this shrieking changeling who's replaced her), she gets to grow up. She's adopted (legally and everything!) because Tragic Circumstances (not caused by Louis this time). Now, I thought Bailey played Claudia a lot younger than 14 in the beginning and I really enjoyed it. Claudia almost certainly didn't get a childhood, so when Louis and Lestat vamped her, she did, and I take my characterization from that because this is supposed to be fun.

Anyway, they adopt Claudia at younger than 14 - young enough that she's still asking "is that my fountain?" "is that my house" "are we a family?" and she is exactly as spoiled as she is in the show. Whatever she wants, she gets. Louis and Lestat dote on her. Lestat especially, spoils her. They have a special bond (I've yet to figure out about what yet; not the stage, that comes later and Claudia is sooooo mad about it). She has special bonds with both of her dads, but in her early childhood, she's especially close with Lestat because they're so similar. When she hits her tweens and teens, that's when she gets closer to Louis because "the NOISE, the DRAMA, he's so STUPID! he doesn't understand ANYTHING" and "noise! Noise is this torment that you pretend is music! I taught you better! She knows, Louis! She knows what music is; she only does this to HURT ME!, 'DRAMA?! DRAMA?! shouting in French', 'I AM AN ADULT; I UNDERSTAND EVERYTHING AND IT IS YOU WHO IS STUPID, UNGRATEFUL BRAT!' followed by the very loud, very identical sounds of inarticulate rage, a chorused 'I HATE YOU' and the slamming of two doors in unison.

Lestat would absolutely argue like this with his teenage daughter. He would absolutely be the parent says 'your face is stupid!' to his kid, throw the exact same tantrum while his husband watches serenely 'LOUIS, MON CHER, HOW CAN YOU TAKE HER SIDE?!!!!!!! DO YOU NO LONGER LOVE ME?????' Meanwhile, Louis has said nothing as he listened to the two of them present their case to him as if he's some kind of judge. As if he wasn't just sitting here all cozy, reading his book when these two loud brats stomped (loudly) into the living room and stood in front of him, taking turns (loudly) hurling insults at each other while throwing their arms out as if they're presenting one another to Louis and then looking at Louis as if to say 'can you BeLieVE what i have to put up with? Louis does believe it. Louis absolutely believes because Louis is currently putting up with it times two every day of his life. He is seriously reconsidering Lestat's offer to nominate him for sainthood and present his case to The Church. St. Louis of New Orleans. It has as ring to it. Louis is not serene. He only looks serene because he is imagining his own softer world where his husband and daughter had quiet fights, upstairs, away from him, while he got to finish a book (one! single! book!) without interruption. And now that they've both stormed off without waiting him to render a verdict (he has yet to do this; he is mildly disappointed because he kind of wants to do that thing Armand showed him on the Ipad that time - hold up a picture of each one of them and tell them it's the same picture. He'd been a little confused by it at first and then Armand have given him a long lecture on memes on and Internet Culture before Daniel (Old Maniel, my beloved! I don't care; this is my new favorite iteration of devil's minion and you can pry it from my cold, dead hands) cut in: "Armand, I think he's got it. I had to explain memes to him. He had a lot of questions and I did a lot of research. Sorry, Louis." Louis, had in fact gotten it, gotten it quite a while ago. He'd pretty much gotten it as soon as Armand had pulled up a picture of the meme that wasn't two obscure Renaissance paintings.

He's not as technologically inept as everyone seems to think he is. Lestat is obsessed with social media. Louis helps him photographs his "thirst traps." (I imagine that's how Louis imagines the word thirst traps in his head.) Which reminds him. He's pretty sure he's due for that meltdown soon enough. It's getting harder to bribe Claudia's friends not to show her her dad's Insta. Louis does, in fact call it Insta. Occasionally 'the 'Gram' when he wants to be silly. Because Lestat. And because he's bribing his daughter's friends to steer away her away from the small empire Lestat has built across various social media websites.

Lestat's been a very benevolent ruler; he loves engaging with his subjects. Louis wishes he would engage a little less because he is very concerned that the one video of Lestat doing the Britney Spears knife dance in his underwear) is going to go viral. Right now, the good citizens of Lestat's fiefdom are hoarding it to themselves, making it their new 'iykyk' wink-wink nudge-nudge. And it was one of the paid streams, but still. Of course it was going to get out. He's just glad the public Lestat subreddit has banned posting it and is being strict about taking it down every time it goes up. (Louis is bizarrely familiar with certain corners of the internet, but he doesn't even know the nyan cat meme. Old? Yes. But standard curriculum for anyone who knows memes. Which Louis does not. The only memes he knows are Lestat memes and they all originated with Lestat. He doesn't even know they're called memes. He just thinks of them as funny edits pointing out Lestat being ridiculous. He can't believe Lestat likes them as much as he does, frankly. I love Louis.)

So, yes. That's another thing St. Louis of New Orleans has on his plate. His daughter's inevitable discovery of her father's social media following and that the real reason all her friends always want to hang out at her house is because they think her dad is hot, not because they're rich (well, they are and that is part of it, but mostly it's because they want to ogle Lestat. They think they're being subtle. They are not. Claudia, so far, has assumed it's because they share the same opinion of her father as she does: that he's a ridiculous idiot and that they're laughing at him, not giggling about Lestat 'just breathed omg!' like the 14 year-olds they are.)

Le sigh. This post was supposed to be about Claudia and her Regina George era and Lestat and Louis getting called to the principal's office and listening to a list of her crimes and making Very Serious faces at her and getting to the car and Louis starting to lecture and Lestat asking why she wasted her time on this instead of taking down the other Ultimate Mean Girl that just moved here who's trying to challenge Claudia's status as the Prettiest and Most Perfect Princess That Ever Walked This Earth Everyone Loves Her Just What Are You Insinuating About My Daughter [insert French insult] (did I already say Lestat is French in every universe? well, if i didn't, he is, and if i did, now you're really certain.)

Anyway, enjoy my crack thoughts about everyone's favorite vampire family.

[cordspaghetti]

couple weeks ago…

[the-eclectic-wonderer]

I really have to congratulate myself on my exceptional timing with this podcast. I finally listen to the new episode, and Alice goes ‘it’s on the train!!’ right as I’m boarding a train myself. 10/10, no notes.

[altho-arto]

ADVISORS! plural !! Oooh Kabru is definitely staying in the kingdom with the toudens and marcille im 99.9999% sure of it now that chapter 97 is out

I want a hundred chapters of the post-canon silly Kabru&Marcille sitcom "we are trying to rule this kingdom but SOMEONE is not helping" Kingdom shenanigans 💚 (the someone is usually Laios. the older races' diplomats and ex-shadow governors are not helping tho)

(ID in alt text)

[alch-emi]

If there’s still a Yugioh Arc-V fandom out there please accept my offering

[mytho-maniac-108]

Wikipedia tells me one of the meanings of the name Andromache is "man-battler".

Andromache is named such that she fights against men. All the men in her family get killed. Her father, her brothers, her husband and even her son. IIRC, in contrast, her mother lives and dies naturally at her father's house. With the exception of Astynax, all the men are killed by Achilles.

I'M TEARING MY HAIR OUT!!!

Homer. Homer I'm shaking you by the shoulders. WHY DOES ANDROMACHE NOT KILL ANYONE WHYYYY??? SUCH HARDSHIP FOR MY GIRL AND SHE CAN'T EVEN KILL PEOPLE IN A WAR??? SHE SHOULD'VE BEEN ALLOWED TO STRANGLE ACHILLES!!!

[halorvic]

The danger is clear and present: COVID isn’t merely a respiratory illness; it’s a multi-dimensional threat impacting brain function, attacking almost all of the body’s organs, producing elevated risks of all kinds, and weakening our ability to fight off other diseases. Reinfections are thought to produce cumulative risks, and Long COVID is on the rise. Unfortunately, Long COVID is now being considered a long-term chronic illness — something many people will never fully recover from. Dr. Phillip Alvelda, a former program manager in DARPA’s Biological Technologies Office that pioneered the synthetic biology industry and the development of mRNA vaccine technology, is the founder of Medio Labs, a COVID diagnostic testing company. He has stepped forward as a strong critic of government COVID management, accusing health agencies of inadequacy and even deception. Alvelda is pushing for accountability and immediate action to tackle Long COVID and fend off future pandemics with stronger public health strategies. Contrary to public belief, he warns, COVID is not like the flu. New variants evolve much faster, making annual shots inadequate. He believes that if things continue as they are, with new COVID variants emerging and reinfections happening rapidly, the majority of Americans may eventually grapple with some form of Long COVID. Let’s repeat that: At the current rate of infection, most Americans may get Long COVID.

[...]

LP: A recent JAMA study found that US adults with Long COVID are more prone to depression and anxiety – and they’re struggling to afford treatment. Given the virus’s impact on the brain, I guess the link to mental health issues isn’t surprising. PA: There are all kinds of weird things going on that could be related to COVID’s cognitive effects. I’ll give you an example. We’ve noticed since the start of the pandemic that accidents are increasing. A report published by TRIP, a transportation research nonprofit, found that traffic fatalities in California increased by 22% from 2019 to 2022. They also found the likelihood of being killed in a traffic crash increased by 28% over that period. Other data, like studies from the National Highway Traffic Safety Administration, came to similar conclusions, reporting that traffic fatalities hit a 16-year high across the country in 2021. The TRIP report also looked at traffic fatalities on a national level and found that traffic fatalities increased by 19%. LP: What role might COVID play? PA: Research points to the various ways COVID attacks the brain. Some people who have been infected have suffered motor control damage, and that could be a factor in car crashes. News is beginning to emerge about other ways COVID impacts driving. For example, in Ireland, a driver’s COVID-related brain fog was linked to a crash that killed an elderly couple. Damage from COVID could be affecting people who are flying our planes, too. We’ve had pilots that had to quit because they couldn’t control the airplanes anymore. We know that medical events among U.S. military pilots were shown to have risen over 1,700% from 2019 to 2022, which the Pentagon attributes to the virus.

[...]

LP: You’ve criticized the track record of the CDC and the WHO – particularly their stubborn denial that COVID is airborne. PA: They knew the dangers of airborne transmission but refused to admit it for too long. They were warned repeatedly by scientists who studied aerosols. They instituted protections for themselves and for their kids against airborne transmission, but they didn’t tell the rest of us to do that.

[...]

LP: How would you grade Biden on how he’s handled the pandemic? PA: I’d give him an F. In some ways, he fails worse than Trump because more people have actually died from COVID on his watch than on Trump’s, though blame has to be shared with Republican governors and legislators who picked ideological fights opposing things like responsible masking, testing, vaccination, and ventilation improvements for partisan reasons. Biden’s administration has continued to promote the false idea that the vaccine is all that is needed, perpetuating the notion that the pandemic is over and you don’t need to do anything about it. Biden stopped the funding for surveillance and he stopped the funding for renewing vaccine advancement research. Trump allowed 400,000 people to die unnecessarily. The Biden administration policies have allowed more than 800,000 to 900,000 and counting.

[...]

LP: The situation with bird flu is certainly getting more concerning with the CDC confirming that a third person in the U.S. has tested positive after being exposed to infected cows. PA: Unfortunately, we’re repeating many of the same mistakes because we now know that the bird flu has made the jump to several species. The most important one now, of course, is the dairy cows. The dairy farmers have been refusing to let the government come in and inspect and test the cows. A team from Ohio State tested milk from a supermarket and found that 50% of the milk they tested was positive for bird flu viral particles.

[...]

PA: There’s a serious risk now in allowing the virus to freely evolve within the cow population. Each cow acts as a breeding ground for countless genetic mutations, potentially leading to strains capable of jumping to other species. If any of those countless genetic experiments within each cow prove successful in developing a strain transmissible to humans, we could face another pandemic – only this one could have a 58% death rate. Did you see the movie “Contagion?” It was remarkably accurate in its apocalyptic nature. And that virus only had a 20% death rate. If the bird flu makes the jump to human-to-human transition with even half of its current lethality, that would be disastrous.

[charlietheepicwriter7]

"You can't move him up a grade!" The social worker said, aghast. "I won't deny that Danny is brilliant, but look at his social skills. He needs proper socialization with people his age, not-"

"People on the same level as him?" Tim asked. He was glaring at the woman.

"High schoolers," she finished, giving Tim a look.

Dick's hands were folded as if in prayer, pressed against his mouth. "I understand you point, Mrs. Gonzalez, but this is my reasoning; there is not an eighth grade class in this country that can handle Danny. He curses. He drinks. He smokes. I love that kid and I'm doing the best I can, but he's a feral goblin child and you, or any teacher, can't control him."

She looked like she swallowed a raw egg, but Mrs. Gonzalez had been Danny's social worker since the paperwork went through, and was a long time friend of the police chief in Bludhaven. She'd been there for the Toast Incident; she knew how Danny was. "...Why don't we consider a homeschool program first? With after school and weekend activities."

Dick flashed a smile. "That's better."

[iwritenarrativesandstuff]

Killua: “I just want to be a kid and have a friend my own age who’s nice and do normal things like hanging out with them” :(

Killua: *befriends the least normal 12-year-old known to man*

[stuckinapril]

Proud to say I’m at a place where I’m very ambitious w my goals, but still very content w where I currently am. No matter my financial or academic or just any personal aspirations at all, I’m so in love w my life as it is and realize that it will be no objectively better when I do attain all the tangible things I want to attain. Legitimately so happy to just be here, surrounded by love and books and privileged to be studying and gaining knowledge. At the end of the day this really is all that matters to me. And this is a feeling no amount of money can buy

[warlenys]

first bit of this fucks but then ?? what “implication that he’ll be okay” bitch he’s gonna kill himself

[yuri-is-online]

I can get why yutus so afraid of azul. He's heard a hundred stories about a suave, smug, but clingy octopus and then he meets him and hes this possessive little swinderler who's trying to get him to sell his soul to him and fuck his parent lmao

referencing the tags on this ask about this au

Tako Yutu didn't have the easiest time as a kid.

He was a chubby little thing raised by a single parent who didn't have the clearest memories of his father, or of their past at all really. I wrote Yuu and Yutu as being a sort of outcasts in the community because people thought they were strange, and were skeptical of Yuu's amnesia. Azul! Yutu was really bothered by that, much like his dad he got bullied and sought solace in books, but unlike him Yuu decided to enroll Yutu in some martial arts classes and hey. He was pretty good at those, his submission holds are real bad news, even won him some competitions. But he's not some muscle head even if he sort of looks like one (he didn't really drop his baby weight so much as he did bulk up) so when he gets his first real look at his father... everything in him is screaming that this guy is sketchy. He knows that Azul and the twins are watching him even if he can't see it outright and to make matters worse, when he asks his parent about him they make a face. A face Yutu knows well that he thought was reserved for the annoying nosy couple who lived next door to you and not his father. His father who Yuu's few memories had made sound wonderful; his father who was supposedly talented and hard working, smart and proud of it, but so desperately in love with his parent they still longed for him with broken memories in a completely different world. His father who Yuu had said he was so much like.

"He's not a bad guy." Yuu says and Grim huffs.

"Don't listen to them Henchuman 2." Yutu has no idea how he feels about Grim calling him that. "Azul's reeeeeeeal bad news. If he's interested in ya' it can only mean one thing, he's after your tuna and he's after your magic."

"That's two things." A smooth voice says at the same time he does and for once, Yutu sees surprise on Azul's face when he tries to make eye contact and not carefully calculated confidence.

"Well they do say great minds think alike." His father says and extends a hand. "But I must say you didn't strike me as the shy type, it is Yutu right?" The way he says it, the way he shakes his hand, Yutu knows he at least suspects him. So he smiles and makes sure to make his handshake just a touch too firm when he responds.

"That's right." Yutu is impressed that Azul doesn't flinch even slightly when he pulls back his hand, if anything his little action makes his smile wider. "And not so much shy as just curious and knowing better than to poke my nose where it doesn't belong."

"Not until you've asked anyway." Azul really isn't content with letting him remain ambiguous, he thinks nervously glancing back to Yuu. "But still there really is no need to bother the prefect over such trivial things, if you have questions about me you can just pay me a visit at the Mostro Lounge. My door is always open to poor unfortunate souls such as yourself." Azul smiles at him and adjusts his glasses and Yutu is... impressed even if the thought of being alone with this man terrifies him. But he's going to have to be eventually, Azul really wants to talk to him for some reason and Yutu finds himself wondering if he's going to find it possible to lie, or just what price he will be expected to pay to have the privilege of keeping his secrets.

But when he looks at the way Azul talks to Yuu... he isn't sure if he likes it but he does find it funny. Azul is so horrendously down bad and Yuu is so unaware of it (there's a part of him that thinks Azul might be a little bit jealous of him which he finds really funny). And Yutu understands why Yuu likes Azul so much. He is everything they remembered him being: smart, ambitious, and motivated. It makes him a little more secure in his existence even if he doubts that Azul will like having a son like him. But that's ok too because a son like him is exactly what's needed to make sure his parents get to stay together in this timeline.

now if only he can convince him to stop bugging him for his real name

[orbiyoo]

sorry

[welcometogrouchland]

I miss them so bad (Dick and Damian)

[nevertheless-moving]

thinking about how fucking impossible it would be to pine secretly after someone on roshar. Like even if we assume that passionspren are only summoned by the most intense love and/or horniness - that's almost worse isn't it? Because you wouldn't be able to laugh it off like 'haha just a passing thought. Whoops again? Hahaha oh I suppose I have a little crush'

Anyway Kaladin doing one of his canonical epic hero glowing stunts with his canonical destroyed/soaked clothing (what. the man is constantly avoiding shardblades and arrows by a hairsbreath and flying around In Highstorms. The only reason he would even have pants at the end of WOR after the everstorm/highstorm fight is because we're following comic book rules- there's no way this man isn't going through clothes faster than James T Kirk - even if he's not his uniform shirt is WHITE and -)

ANYWAY kaladin having one of his Protaganist Moments and like. There is less than than zero time between the 'Oh. Oh.' Moment and Eventual Feelings Reveal because blorbo B is very visibly displaying a personified manifestation of intense romantic adoration.

[goodobservationshirley]

She sacrificed herself to save us all. No, you are mistaken, Camnir. She did not do it to save us. She did it to save the ring.