#and maybe briefly thinking about May Day Bullshit

[badolmen]

Sometimes you lie awake at midnight thinking, “wow. I really needed to contact a trauma therapist months ago.”

[readersandimagines]

Gone Missing - Chapter 1

Okay so this took me way too long to write! I decided to try and write it in first person but also still keep it neutral enough that a reader could place themselves in the story? I may scrap this and go back to 2nd or 3rd person we shall see! Sooo let me know what you think! Only other warning I have is I didn't proof read this and quickly put it together.

But uhh essentially you're Adam's sibling and he's been missing for three days too many so you do what any sensable human would do and go to the police station to report him missing. Dectective Hoffman is on the case ;3

It had been three days. Three days wondering where in the world my brother, Adam had gotten up to. I sighed, checking my phone for what felt like the hundredth time today. Still no callback. Maybe Adam just got busy, I thought trying to reassure myself that he was fine. The last time we spoke he told me about some ex cop that was paying him pretty good money, so maybe he was just busy with that?

“I can’t do this anymore!” I exclaimed, standing up to grab my coat.

I quickly locked the door to my apartment and headed out. I needed to stay calm, but my mind raced with too many thoughts to grab hold of anything. As I walked and held my phone close; Adam had exactly 20 minutes to call me before I reported him as a missing person. I knew he would be angry, but I couldn’t lose him. He was the only family I had left.

The autumn air was crisp as I started to walk along the street. Cars and people passed by continuing on their way. Their world continued to move forward while it felt like mine froze. I could feel a lump growing in my throat as I pushed the door open to enter the Metropolitan Police Department.

The front was unremarkable dead. A small lobby with a few chairs and a main desk with an officer to greet you. Taking a deep breath, I approached the desk mentally preparing to deal with whatever bullshit these guys could throw at me. As long as they help me find him that’s all that matters. 

“Name and case number?” the voice asked.

“Uhh… I don’t have one?” I answered, earning a sigh and annoyed glance from the man behind the desk.

Normally this man wouldn’t have bothered me so much. I would just sass him back and yet I couldn’t bring myself to do that. 

“You don’t have a name?” the cop asked a little louder, gaining some attention from people behind him.

“I have a name, but I don’t have a case number.” I responded, feeling my chest tighten. “I… need to file a missing persons case.”

“Sweetie people go missing every day in this town, you sure they didn’t just dump you?”

Anger, confusion, sadness. Each one leaving as quickly as it came. I couldn’t understand how walking into a police station was such a problem. The man behind the desk examined me, seeming to want to say something else before another man in a suit walked up. The two officers exchanged words briefly before the man in the suit walked over. I clenched my jaw, I knew I shouldn’t have come here. I would have better luck finding Adam myself than trusting these people.

“Detective Hoffman,” the man called, extending his rather large hand out to me.

“_________ Stanheight,” I answered, taking his hand into my own. 

He had a strong, but gentle handshake as he gestured to the chairs in the lobby. If this had been a regular day, I would have been having to contain my emotions as I looked over the detective. He had the brightest blue eyes and a nice smile. He wasn’t ripped like other cops, but he definitely seemed to be in shape. I just hoped he could help me find Adam.

“I couldn’t help but overhear,” Detective Hoffman said, gesturing towards the front desk. “What makes you think someone is missing?”

“I don’t think anyone is missing. I know my brother Adam is missing. We talk everyday and now I can’t get in touch with him,” I huffed, my annoyance starting to grow as the detective nodded, pulling a notebook out of his pocket.

“Adam huh? How long has it been since you spoke? Could he just not have his phone?” he asked, earning a glare from me.

“It’s been three days. Look, I know he’s missing. We talk everyday. And one of your officers hired him to follow some doctor--” I snapped before he cut me off.

“One of our officers?” 

“Yes! Some old guy-- Bob Tapp? I think?” I exclaimed, mentally kicking myself for not getting the name when Adam had originally told me.

“Detective Tapp? But he’s dea--” the original guy from the desk started to say before Hoffman cut him off.

“All the more reason to take their information,” he said sharply.

“D-dead?” I stammered, my eyes widening. “No, you have to be mistaken, Adam just got hired by this guy.”

Everything around me felt like it was spinning. If the guy that hired Adam was dead-- no Adam couldn’t be dead. My thoughts grew louder and I couldn’t focus. Time seemed to freeze. I could feel tears filling my eyes before I felt a strong, but firm touch on my shoulder bringing me back to reality for a moment.

“Hey, I need you to calm down. We will do everything we can to find your brother,” Hoffman said firmly.

“He can’t die,” I whispered, trying desperately to stop the flood gates trying to open. “He’s… the only family I have left.”Hoffman’s face softened briefly and he nodded like he understood what I felt. I needed to calm down. I needed to give him the information. But I also desperately needed to go out and start my own search. It felt like the wind had been knocked from beneath my sails and yet all I could do was focus on one singular thought: Adam could be in serious danger.

[danisbrainrot]

modern day taivan hc’s if they never broke up maybe………………………

taivan <3

ofc!! this might seem out of character but idk how else to write it considering they lived VERY different lives.

first, I think they would have broken up briefly after being rescued—just until taissa finished uni. but they'd miss each other everyday, and would flick through photos whenever it's quiet or its late at night.

they both move far away from their home town—too many bad memories.

that's why it's so shocking when they see each other randomly one day, bumping into each other somewhere that's so far from where they grew up. (literally tied together by an invisible string).

when they meet up again after like a few years, immediately tai flings herself into van's arms because she missed them so bad—it doesn't matter where they are, a bar, uni, on the street. she just needed to feel van's warmth again.

after dating for like two months, they move in together and start renting a shitty flat above a movie rental store, and van works there while tai works at some fancy lawyer firm. they make ends meet, and they get frustrated from time to time, but the nights always ends in them showing how much they loved each other.

whenever tai does the dishes it's compulsory for van to wrap her arms around tai's waist and snuggle her chin into the crook of tai's neck. they would do a lot of domestic fluff like this, because they just wanna make up for lost time.

the two of them snuggled on the couch while watching movies van borrowed from downstairs, popcorn bowl tucked neatly between them. they're drowning in blankets, but it doesn't matter because they're both just so comfy.

late night discussions about what happened in the woods because they need to find some way to process what the fuck happened out there.

van comforting tai when she starts sleep walking again. they try everything, even tying her to the bed post, but they end up finding work is stressing her out, so they go on a small trip upstate to visit their family.

I feel like life would be a lot slower and peaceful for tai, purely because van doesn't let her get on her bullshit. simone may have accepted and encouraged running for senator (or whatever she ran for, can't quite remember) but after not talking for a few years, van wants all of tai's time and attention. the idea of losing her to the election and strategy meetings is not appealing to her. she dissuades taissa, almost causing a rift in their marriage. but they find their way back to each other, again, cause invisible strings!

I don't think they'd have kids together, honestly. I'm open to changing my mind about that though.

[fahatesyou]

Hybrid/FishMax Au Snippet

(Mature, some references to Fish biology, Maxiel)

Just a small snippet of my last work in process, maybe this won’t make the Final Cut and I will change it for something else but… it has been sitting on my drafts for so long I may just let it out for some feed back, let me know what you think!

“It’s your fault.” Max said, stepping out of his tight jeans on his way to the bathroom, mindlessly leaving a trail of dirty clothes behind him.

Daniel followed him, too dumbstruck to fight back Max’s accusations. His stomach was evidently bloated, like he had eaten too many slices of pizza in one sitting.

Brad had warned him briefly, just some cryptic words that now made so much more sense than a few hours ago.

At the time Brad’s words could had meant a lot of things; Daniel didn’t spect to find Max full of eggs.

“You just won’t stop touching it.” Max groaned, his pale skin almost shining under the bathroom’s lights. Daniel wanted him to turn around to see more, to get a better look. “That’s why it’s back.”

He dipped his toes to test the water briefly and let out an unpleased sound, sinking himself into the tub anyways.

“Sorry.” Daniel apologized, not really knowing why, just too busy glaring at Max’s soft belly hiding under the water.

Eggs. Max’s stomach full of eggs.

Stomach? Uterus?

Daniel didn’t fucking know.

He had been touching Max’s slit. The consequences of that had been a mystery to Daniel until now.

Of course he knew Max was a hybrid, everyone knew, for better or for worse, Max was one of the few hybrids on the grid, and had smugly silenced most critics since the day his debut was announced.

Max had completely shut down the doubts of those old school pricks about a water hybrid chances of winning a race that didn’t involved a pool.

Daniel had seen Max’s gills countless of times back when they were teammates, so the whole goldfish parts of Max weren’t exactly a revelation to Daniel once both their clothes had came completely off.

Jos had been a proud shark, there was nothing Jos liked talk about more than his depredator instincts and how unfair being a sea hybrid in F1 surrounded by mammals was for him.

It all stank of bullshit to Daniel, Jos complaints had sounded to Daniel’s ears like a bunch of lame excuses for his actual lack of talent.

It was always such a annoying thing to Daniel growing up; having to hear the rest of the hybrid kids and their families excuse themselves on their biology for their failures.

Daniel never wanted to be more than a human. He didn’t need no extra body parts to win a race.

And then there was Max.

Daniel never found Max ashamed of being an hybrid, but it was definitely the last thing Max ever wanted to talk about when it came to racing. That was mostly why he liked Max more than any other teammate he had before. Max didn’t treat Daniel like some poor clueless guy who was missing something. Max liked racing and Daniel liked Max.

It was all it matter.

Sex with Max was a little bit more complex.

Daniel liked to think of himself as someone open minded, nowhere close to a prude. He had fucked men before Max came along, and even some memorable hybrid girl in Brazil whose tail rapped around Daniel’s cock while he was eating her out. He enjoyed it very much, just like the rest of the stuff he did in bed with his partners. Daniel had been around enough to not be surprised anymore, and a tail or a pair of furry ears weren’t the end of the world.

He wasn’t fucking ready for Max’s pussy.

Slit.

That was what Max called it.

So. Max’s slit.

They spent the first weeks of their relationship dry humping and jerking each other off, maybe Max’s lack of balls should had been an initial warning, but hybrids were so complicated creatures Daniel just didn’t pay it no mind.

At first, Max refused to let Daniel touch him anywhere near his soft opening.

So it took a couple of secretive glances and some personal research for Daniel to figure out Max had been lying to him all time long.

Max had told him his slit was nothing but a mating body part, that it didn’t really do anything more than lay eggs each time his estrus came along.

It was bullshit. Or so did the Internet claim.

But Daniel didn’t want to push, and he wasn’t raised to be an asshole. Max had his boundaries, his things he didn’t like and things he loved.

It was just the wet sound of the lips hiding between Max’s legs as he squirmed on the bed from Daniel sucking his dick what was enough to break the self control of even the most honorable of men.

Daniel hasn’t in fact stop touching Max’s slit since.

The first time he fucked Max was like discovering sex all over again.

He was hot and warm in some indescribable ways that couldn’t be compared to the women Daniel had slept with. The brain melting tightness of his slit became Daniel’s kryptonite.

They had spent all off season finding out how many ways there were for Max to come on Daniel’s cock. It had took some hard earned swaying but when Max had finally agreed and parted his legs to let Daniel inside his precious untouched entrance, there was no coming back.

So now Max’s mating cycle had came back.

And apparently, Daniel’s dick was pretty much to blame.

[deviantartdramahub]

Hey, I need to call out a DA user called MLPTMNTFan2000. The reason I'm calling him out is that he supports incest. (Possibly also pedophilia?) I wanted about it briefly in this post right here. https://www.deviantart.com/gellygirl/status-update/God-fucking-damnit-I-m-so-1069006829 In the comments you can also see a disgusting white-knight blindly defending him. PrincessLilyBrush, who not only also defends incest, but seems to discriminate against adopted children. I'd like to say even if she's adopted, Loona is Blitzo's canonical daughter. You making a bullshit HC to make up excuses for defending and supporting gross stuff like incest won't cut it, buster. https://www.deviantart.com/mlptmntfan2000/art/Helluva-Boss-Happy-Pride-Month-Day-1068763292 Here's the art that made me realize what a gross manchild he was. And yes, We had a whole conversation there, but he censored me and got rid of any evidence of me calling him out. But he can't do anything about this, can he? So anyways, this incel made a fanchild between Loona and Blitzo, a daughter and father. I went digging for more examples. https://www.deviantart.com/mlptmntfan2000/art/Helluva-Boss-A-Wonderful-Gifts-to-Her-Sister-1051597050 (This was made when I was watching him, but I tried assuring myself it wasn't a gross incest thing, and maybe the Ava girl was just a fan-made granddaughter for Blitzo or something...I just wish I alerted myself about the red flags and called out and got away from this moronic creep sooner.) And then this...https://www.deviantart.com/mlptmntfan2000/art/Helluva-Boss-OC-Ava-1032780898 GROSS, straight up stating with no shame what-so-ever that Loona's both her mom and sister. Ugh...and oh my God...it also says Loona was a teenager when they were raising her? Which means Blitzo not only had a child with his daughter, but specifically with his TEENAGE DAUGHTER? FUCKING DISGUSTING! So he IS supporting pedophilia as well! It doesn't matter if Loona's an adult now, BC HE MADE HER HAVE A CHILD WITH HER OWN FUCKING DAD WHEN SHE WAS A MINOR!

This person is so fucking twisted and appalling, and it's so cathartic to expose such a spineless scumbag!! >m<

Do what you want with this information as long as you don't go to far like doxxing or something, but someone like this belongs behind bars -_-

Their art is against DA TOS, for all reading this who are wondering. They may come here to voice their perspectives, but even if someone thinks something is supportable, site rules should be respected, as it's the admins' site. Some education about why may help.

[theladycarpathia]

Empty Places chapter 3 - Apparition

Back to Chapter 2

Alright, so Billy isn’t totally immune to whatever bullshit is going on.

This house gives him the creeps. Like the actual heebie-jeebies, like his Grandma Lizzie used to say. There’s a strange shiver down his spine, like someone is just watching. Watching him, watching Robin, watching Steve.

But he goes down to the basement anyway. He knows Steve fucking hates it, so he volunteers. He does it every time.

One of these days, they really need to stop splitting up for these walkthroughs. He doesn’t believe in it like Steve does but he still thinks that one of these days, they’re gonna get killed that way. Either he’ll fall through a floor or some drifter will slit their throats, because they’re still stupid kids wandering into places that they don’t belong.

The basement door swings open smoothly on its hinges and somehow that’s worse. But Billy flicks on his flashlight, turns on his camera and heads down into the darkness anyway.

The stairs creak underfoot and Billy checks each one before he puts down his weight. But despite their age, they all hold and Billy steps down onto the concrete floor in one piece.

He’s not going to find anything down here. He’ll find junk that the Packards left behind when they abandoned the place, maybe some other stuff from previous owners. If he’s really lucky, he’ll find yet another creepy portrait of the Creels, but that’s probably going to be the scariest thing he finds today.   

The basement is cold concrete, a hollow shell that was never fully filled out. Not one of the house's residents ever felt the need to renovate to make a spare room, a play room, or even bothered to slap a pool table and an old sofa down here and call it a man cave. There’s a bulb on a cable overhead but Billy doesn’t bother finding a switch. 

According to their research, the basement is in a strange configuration, corridors set out in a neat square until you eventually double back on yourself. Billy looks back behind him, at the dark corridor past the staircase and shrugs. He may as well make a loop.

The first room he comes to is nothing but boxes packed against every available wall space. Judging by the dust on some of them, the faded writing and the quality of the cardboard, the Packards weren’t the only ones to leave stuff behind. The basement must have accumulated everyone’s unwanted crap - every time someone moved in they just added their own boxes to the ones in the basement and no one ever cleared them out. And the next room is more of the same - boxes and boxes, a kid’s old trike, a bassinet shoved into a corner. Billy frowns and moves on. Jesus. This is going to be the most boring walkthrough he’s ever done.

But as he moves through the rooms, something begins to pick away at him. This basement is far too large for the size of the house. And while it’s a pretty big house, the basement offers nearly as much space as the whole first floor. And when Billy shines his torch down the hallway, he gets the idea that it’s not a dead end there either.

What was the point? Did Andrew Newton hope to host some sort of speakeasy down here before he’d kicked it? Because why would you need a space of this size underneath an already pretty sizable house? No one ever even made use of it - they chucked their crap down here and left it alone.

And Billy doesn’t blame them. Even without the stark concrete walls, cold floors and dark, windowless rooms this basement has a strange feeling about it. If the house felt empty and sad, then this place is even worse, leaving Billy with an uneasy feeling in his gut.

This one is weird. Maybe the Packards booked it for a fucking reason. 

He hits the end of the hallway and is met by even more doors. Briefly, Billy wonders if there’s even any point in looking in them. The most he can expect to find is more boxes, some huge cobwebs and a whole lot of musty stale air. He’s not exactly expecting that they’ll watch the footage back and see spirits flickering across the screen.

But the next corridor throws up something new. A passageway split right down the center, probably leading him back to where he started at the staircase…or so it should. Billy shines his light down it and frowns. He didn’t see any other entrance when he came down here. So where the hell does this go? 

He wanders down it, shining his light over the walls. Unlike the other corridors that offer two or three rooms, there’s only one door here. It looks older than all the rest, made of some strange, splintered, reddish wood. All the other doors are more modern and new, so why the hell does this one look like it was made in the dark ages? Billy’s fingers just about graze the weathered old wood when he hears something that takes several years off of his life.

“Billy?” 

Billy automatically jerks a hand down to the walkie on his belt before he realizes. The voice didn’t come from the walkie. It came from behind him.

He jerks his head around, shining the torch across every inch of the hallway, heart thudding furiously in his chest. But there’s nothing there. He’s alone.

“What the fuck?” Billy whispers, cold trickling down his spine. But he shakes it off. He’s letting the others get to him. Steve especially knows just about every trope and horror cliche going. In all honesty, if they were actually in a horror movie, Steve is probably the only one getting out alive. 

“Billy?” the voice continues, high-pitched and clear. Billy’s fingers grow clammy around the flashlight. It’s not fucking possible. The house is empty.

And yet, someone is calling him.

“Billy!” There’s urgency in this last plea, some desperation from the unseen caller. Billy steps towards it, moving his torch from side to side across the hallway, only to find it completely empty. 

Someone’s fucking with him, they have to be. Maybe Steve or Robin decided to mess around with him for this one, and are actually playing a recording from behind him in the dark.

Billy returns back the way he came, unable to stop his heart racing as he searches for the voice. There’s still space here that he hasn’t covered, the remains of this corridor and the one leading back to the stairs. 

But there’s the logical side of his brain pointing out that they probably couldn’t have gotten down the stairs to the basement without him noticing and that the cellar door is still firmly locked. And what’s really creeping him out is the fact that it doesn’t sound like a voice playing over a recorder. It almost sounds like she could be whispering in his ear. 

Billy eyeballs the remaining two doors. Only one way to be sure.

The door slams into the wall as it swings open, propelled by Billy’s foot. But aside from the crash of the metal handle meeting concrete, there’s nothing else. The voice is gone, and as Billy swings his torch from side to side, the room is completely empty. 

Shit. He’s freaking himself out.

But he heard a voice. He knows he did - this wasn’t something carrying on the wind, and it wasn’t Robin’s husky tones echoing from upstairs. This was someone small, a female child, and she was calling Billy.

Billy’s gut twists. In the year and a few months that they’ve been doing this, Billy has never once believed any of the ghouls and goblins shit about any of the places he’s visited. And what makes this house worse is that there’s not even any of that. The Miller barn was supposedly haunted by Old Man Miller, who’d hang you up by your throat. That cottage on Bartlett Lane was supposed to contain a woman in white, who’d kill every man who wandered through her door. Creepy twins, poltergeists, men with axes, blood leaking out of the walls, rattling chains…Billy’s heard it all. Every rumor, legend and folktale going about every supposedly haunted building for miles.

But this one doesn’t have any. Not a dime. Just…people who’ve died. People die. Billy didn’t see any mystery in that. 

Maybe he was wrong. 

A cool breeze drifts across the back of his neck and he nearly jumps out of his skin. So far the basement has been full of still, stale air, the kind that hasn’t known a fresh breeze in nearly a decade. Billy rubs a hand across the back of his neck, unable to stop the prickle of goosebumps. Okay, that’s his limit. Even by the very high standards of bullshit that he operates by, he’s done with this fucking basement. 

And that’s when he hears the chimes.

It’s not quite like the old church bell that used to ring the hour in Hawkins, but the similar heavy toll gives Billy deja vu. It resounds through the hallways, and Billy whirls around, feeling like the walls are closing in. 

And then as quickly as they started, the bells are gone, leaving only an echo and cold sweat down Billy’s back.

His fingers are growing clammy around his torch. Something wants him out of this basement.

But there’s only one door left and Billy thinks that he might be the stupidest person that’s ever lived as he closes his hand around the doorknob. 

There’s a man with his back to the wall; medium height, medium build, with brown hair cut close to the back and sides of his head. He’s wearing jeans and a dark canvas jacket, sturdy black boots peeking out from his hems.

No. This is fucked up. This isn’t real. 

“Dad?” Billy asks in disbelief, because last time he checked, his dad was living in a house two towns over with his new wife and stepdaughter. There’s no reason for him to be here, inspecting the dirt on the walls. 

But then the man turns and Billy feels about seven years old again as Neil Hargrove turns to look at Billy with the same cold eyes he used to have when he beat Billy’s mother.

“Fucking things up again?” Neil inquires, looking around at the dripping pipes, the dust on the windowsill. “You’re meant to be doing things with your life, Billy. Not fucking around with those idiot friends and this waste of time.”

Billy steels himself, no matter how much his throat burns. He sees his dad maybe twice a year for a weekend, and he knows exactly how to behave. He smiles at Max, he compliments Susan. He keeps everything tidy and does every chore before Neil can think to ask it of him. He dresses in more moderate clothes and talks about fake dates with imaginary girls. He doesn’t talk about Steve and Robin, he isn’t sarcastic or rude or loud, and he keeps out of Neil’s way. It’s an ordeal that has to be endured for two days twice a year. He survives. 

This isn’t Neil. But that doesn’t make Billy any less afraid.

“It’s for fun,” Billy says, immediately hating the tremble in his voice. “It’s just a hobby.”

“There are better hobbies,” Neil says immediately, every word like a gunshot. “Worthwhile hobbies. You play a sport, you learn a skill. What exactly does hanging around with the queer freaks and chasing ghosts get you? Hmm? Nothing.” Billy flinches, like he can feel the spit as Neil hisses the last word.

“They’re my friends,” Billy says defensively, because he’s not going to let this cruel parody of his father insult his friends. “And I don’t have to do everything because it’s worthwhile, because colleges will like it. Because it’s deemed worthwhile by you.”

The Neil creature stalks across the room so fast that Billy’s back hits the wall before he has a chance to think about it, his camera clattering to the ground. And oh God, he thought that this thing was a ghost but Neil has a forearm pressed against Billy’s neck before he has the time to react. He can see everything - the glint in Neil’s cold blue eyes, the lines around his mouth, every neatly trimmed hair in his mustache. Billy stifles a sob. He’s not a kid anymore. He’s bigger than Neil, stronger than Neil. He plays basketball and hockey, he bench presses and gets up to run every morning. He’s spent years trying to make sure that he can fight back.

He forgot about his heart. That’s the thing that still gives out on him. 

“I am your father, boy,” Neil says, voice raspy and low. “What have I told you about backtalk?”

Billy closes his eyes. This isn’t real. He doesn’t know how it’s happening but this isn’t real. 

“I'm real enough,” the monster says, mouth twisting in a smirk. And it’s just such a Neil smirk, the same one he used to do when he’d caught Billy in a lie, when he found makeup under Billy’s bed, the torn out pictures of basketball players. “And I still know that there's a whole lot of wrong in you, boy.” Billy sucks in a mouthful of air, because he half forgot to, because this is an old wound that refuses to heal over.

“Oh, yes, I know it,” Neil whispers, pressing down on Billy’s throat. It hurts but Billy’s had worse. “You think I wanted you for a son? Some make-up wearing fag? I’ve seen whores that dress less like sluts! You can push it down and play pretend but you can’t fool me.” 

“I see you four days out of the year, old man,” Billy says, through gritted teeth. Because that was the agreement, even though his mom cries every time one of those weekends comes around. Even though that was the price they paid to be free of Neil. Four days for Billy to play at the picture perfect family. A completely normal son, who likes women and watches sports and has different friends. Billy got used to the fact that Neil didn’t want him as he is a long time ago. “I’m amazed that you notice fucking anything about me.”

Billy’s head connects with the wall as Neil grabs hold of his shirt and yanks him forward, just to whip him back. Billy bites down on the cry that forms in his throat.

“I know a hell of a lot,” Neil purrs. There’s something inhuman about the way he tilts his head, how his eyes are more pupil than iris. “I know what you feel when you let boys touch you. And how you still can’t quite badmouth me to all your friends. And I know about all those dark little thoughts that run through your pretty little head late at night. Do you think that they know?” His eyes flick up coyly to the ceiling, to where several stories above, Steve and Robin are wandering around. Alone. Unprepared.

“Leave them out of this!” Billy says furiously. Neil hums thoughtfully, his fingers tightening in Billy’s shirt.

“Nah, they’ve got their own problems. Maybe not so much the girl. Not a lot that she pushes down. Your friend, Steve, though…” Neil whistles sharply, shaking his head, like Steve is a lost cause. “That boy has it as bad as you. Repression out of the wazoo.”

“Don’t fucking touch him!” Billy bites out, suddenly even more afraid than he’d been before. He stares into the thing’s eyes, because this is just something pushing his buttons and that’s almost a better monster than Neil. And it’s also threatening Steve. 

“You’re in my house,” the thing says, dipping its head low to Billy’s ear. The breath that drifts across Billy’s cheek is cold and rank and Billy squirms. “You hear that a lot, don’t you? My house, my rules.”

“Get fucked,” Billy spits, and the thing grins, mouth splitting open just a little too wide. There’s something behind Neil’s eyes now, some flicker of a sickly bright yellow, with the gleam of a hunter’s eyes catching the light.

“I’ve been doing this a lot longer than you have,” it promises, running a tongue over its bottom lip. Billy watches, sickened, as the tongue extends far longer than any normal human’s should, a little too red and a little too pointed. “And I’m not alone in here. Get out, if you think you can.”

It releases Billy and it’s so unexpected that his legs give way beneath him. He slides to the floor, coughing slightly now that the pressure on his throat has eased. When he looks up, the room is empty, whatever was wearing his dad’s face has vanished. Billy doesn’t stick around to find out if it’s coming back.

He books it to the staircase before he tugs his walkie from his belt. He can’t go racing all over this mansion to find Steve and Robin. He needs to get his friends and get out of here. If they happen to throw gasoline and a lit match on the house as they go, Hawkins is probably better off for it.

“Steve!” he barks, worry rising like a rush of bile in his throat. If he’s seen his worst nightmare, what the hell appeared to them?

The darkness of the basement looms behind him, feeling more like a shroud than before. Billy nervously takes a few more steps up, like a man watching the floodwater roll in.

“Steve, Ro, I’m not fucking around,” he says sharply, real terror beginning to set in. His friends are capable but the element of surprise can be a real fuck up. Even Steve might not manage against a fight he’s not expecting. 

“Someone answer the fucking walkie!” Billy shrieks, slapping a hand against the wall.

Steve’s voice when it comes through is the sweetest sound that he could have imagined.

“Thank fuck, Steve,” he snaps, relief settling over his body and, as usual, coming out with rough edges. Aside from his mom, his friends are the only thing like family that he’s got. He’d sooner die than lose them.  “I’ve been out of my mind. Shit’s weird down here. Are you okay?”

“Yeah,” Steve says, after a beat. He sounds rough, a strange tone to his voice. “I’m okay.”

“Jesus,” Billy mutters, because Steve sounds like shit. He begins to climb the stairs, two or three at a time. One down, one to go. “I’m coming up. Is Ro with you?”

“What?” Steve’s voice sounds confused, and then worry starts to seep in. “No, she’s not with me.” Billy reaches the top and pushes through the basement door, hurriedly kicking it shut behind him. Fuck his stuff, he’s not fucking going in there again. He’s getting the others and getting the hell out of here.

“Then where the hell is she?” he asks in frustration, and sets off down the hall to find Steve.

Onto chapter 4

[flimsy-roost]

hey,

if you went to Redwood High School in 2011/2012, were an average-height white boy with blond hair, and were either in or associated with the special ed system,

hi,

I remember you,

based on my one interaction with you, and on some half-remembered sentences uttered by tertiary characters in this memory (indicating that you may have been in some of their classes), I strongly suspect you're autistic, or neurodivergent in some way. I can't check, I'll never know, I've long since stopped talking to everyone else involved in this memory. this is just the story I tell myself.

so,

you wanted to be friends with a guy with greasy skater-length brown hair and a voice like a chainsmoker, so you followed him around, likely unsure of how to interact but hoping the physical proximity would afford some opportunity for connection. or maybe I'm projecting. unfortunately, this guy was a jackass, and would one day confront you in what I suspect was a purposefully humiliating way. he waited until he had an audience of all of his friends, then physically turned around on you, loudly admonishing you for "stalking" him and telling you clearly, though meanly, to leave him alone. as you scurried away, he turned to the girl next to him and grinned proudly at his assertiveness.

I was the girl. I was dating him at the time.

this moment instigated a seismic shift in my perception of him. even as friends around me commiserated with him about the "creepy guy," I stayed quiet, stunned to silence and horrified by what I saw as an unnecessary cruelty. this capacity for malice recontextualized many other unpleasant moments we'd had. I admit that it took some time to gel. I awkwardly broke up with him that April, promising to remain friends, and spoke to him maybe two more times in my life.

I'm not sure if you saw me, noticed me, remember me. I don't blame you if you don't, there was other bullshit going on at the time. but I remember you. and I couldn't understand what you'd done wrong. I remember your dismay. I thought that I would have been dismayed too. especially because what you did, just hanging around someone hoping they would adopt you as a friend, was how I became friends with nearly every other character in this memory.

a decade later, I got evaluated and ID'd as Autistic and ADHD.

I remembered you. I think you're here, suspended in my long-term memory, because in that deeply unpleasant moment in which we briefly shared space, I felt an inarticulable kinship recognition. lizard-brain shit.

I hope you're doing okay.

[radioromantic-moved]

NYX'S LIBRARY OF GAY SHIT

every (completed) self ship fic i've ever written babey!!! there will be a link to this on my carrd in a little bit. don't worry it's not the full text of every single thing under the keep reading it's just links. i promise

EYE OF THE STORM (DELLA X NYX)

untitled reunion (i'll level with you guys this one is old and probably embarrassing. but in the interest of posterity it's here)

SOMEONE WILL REMEMBER US IN THE FUTURE (THETIS X XENO! THEY HAVE A NAME NOW!)

the sea and those who love it (i haaaate this dialogue i cannot write anything old-fashionedy without sounding like a cringy roleplayer!! also this is technically not complete it was supposed to be like a multichapter thing but it works like this so. it's fine)

YOUR ANNUAL ENTREPRENEUR (FRANK X NYX)

"ray of sunshine" (unfortunately i think maybe i think all of my old shit is a little cringe. this is fine i hope it's fine. aged only a little poorly.)

DOOR TO NOWHERE (HELEN X NYX)

ode to a modern meneleus (this one still fucks. written when i was real sad about her canon death.)

nothing worth loving isn't askew (the longest completed self ship fic i have Ever Written! light body horror in chapter 5, general creepy shit throughout but filtered through the perspective of a protagonist who deals with scary shit through humor. this thing is a Beast it's over 50 pages and i've never shown it in its entirety to anyone before. this feels a little like sending your firstborn child off to school.)

not a fic but! her ship playlist :)

FOLIE‏‏‎ ‎A‏‏‎ ‎DEUX (CYTREX. JESUS CHRIST.)

tw for alcoholism or at least the suggestion of it for everything here

an awful realization fic (how this wretched bullshit all got started)

another awful realization fic (the sequel...briefly suggestive but not on purpose and it's incredibly awkward and terrible for all involved)

whatever this is. (okay i was struggling with intrusive thoughts and having a really bad evening and i needed to comfort myself somehow and listen. listen. listen. did it make me feel better? yes. i don't have a defense on this one. your honor there are worse coping mechanisms...)

drabblecember 3 (not very explicitly romantic but perhaps that is a good thing.)

barstool operatic (has never seen the light of day before! this is a little like sending your secondborn child off to school but they still haven't learned it's not okay to bite people and you're worried you will have to attend a parent teacher meeting. conflicts a little with the canon of the first fic on the list though it doesn't necessarily conflict with the second. genuinely one of the best fanfics i've ever written i just wish it wasn't. well. for this.)

they have a playlist too

COBRA LILY (BERNTIGONE. SO WE DON'T HAVE TO END ON THAT)

drabblecember 1 (sadly the only completed fic i have of them as of right now but i like it the best out of the 3 drabblecembers so it's okay)

one more playlist for the road!

MOTH TO A FLAME (MOSS X NYX ALMOST FORGOT)

drabblecember 2 (still don't Love this one but i may have been too hard on it before. i still want to develop my‏‏‎ ‎monprom‏‏‎ ‎s/i‏‏‎ ‎more they're too generic right now)

[thefixations-ofmine]

OKAY OKAY sorry to be insane in your inbox again but this time i wrote something based on -> #she would take him to the beach and he would love it bc i needed to get their dynamic across, at least the way i see it (i apologize in advance bc i'm not used to writing)

Carl spots May sitting on a vibrant beach towel, looking even more stunning than she did in that knitted top she was wearing the other day. He wonders if her skin feels as soft as it looks. Wonders so many things about her he’s eager to find out. One thing he knows for sure, May Grant is different than the Chicago girls in all the best ways. Approaching her, he notices the AirPods in her ears. Is she a pop girl? She looks like a pop girl. Maybe she likes hip-hop? Or maybe he got her all wrong and she’s the AC/DC type of girl. He gives her a gentle nudge before flopping down next to her, smiling as she tucks the AirPods away. “Hey. What’re you listening to?” May smiles back briefly, “Podcast.” “Uh, cool. Sick band, I listen to them all the time.” The corners of her mouth twitch and she almost snorts, but she’s surprisingly good at maintaining her composure all things considered. That boy didn’t lie when he said he’d mastered the art of bullshitting his way through life. “Really,” she says, her voice thick with amusement as she removes her sunglasses to let him feel the judgement of her glare, “What’s your favorite song?” “Easy,” he scoffs with brazen confidence, “It’s called Take A Swim With Me.” At this point May can’t hide her grin, and she’s doing that thing again where she rolls her eyes, just like when he first tried to get her number at the police station. “Okay, that’s—that’s not a thing.” “Sure is. It’s from the album, uh, I Really Wanna Kiss You. It was a limited edition though, so I understand you’re confused.” Carl leans in just subtly, leaving it up to May to close the rest of the distance. She knew he would be pretty straightforward about his feelings from the moment she met him, and sometimes inappropriately so, but it’s little things like this that make her weak. Draw her in like a moth to the flame. There’s just this fear of getting burned in the back of her head that makes her pull back. Instead, May hands him one of the AirPods. “Here.” Carl gives her a questioning look as she puts the other AirPod in her own ear, and it’s not until she gives him an inviting nod that he does the same. With a beaming smile she grabs her phone. “I’ll show you my favorite song.” “Is it called I’m Totally Into This Guy But I Didn’t Think I Would Like Him And Now I’m Pretending I’m Totally Not Into Him?” he asks bluntly, smirking as she finally lets out that adorable laugh he’s been waiting for. “Jackass.”

☝️☝️☝️

This is so cute stop!!! I got nothing to add here.

May and Carl would definitely have a lot to teach each other about all sorts of things. 🥹

(Btw, anybody who wants to share and be nice is welcome in my inbox!!!)

[anonymous-harpy]

Yoji (Baby Vegeta) from universe 6

Wrote a drable below

There are several fantastic ways of implementing the Tuffle parasite into super, the most interesting to me being that the parasite originates from universe 6 rather than 7. Now this could down several ways, and one day I might explore them in detail, but let’s focus on the most likely one- he’s just as much of a spiteful bastard in U6 as he was in U7, but with more Sayians around and more eyes watching in general he has to be more careful about what he does. Now why would he be from U6 and not U7? I like complicated stories and to put it simply- what if a while before the U6 Sayians joined the space age they were competing with Tuffles? And things got well out of hand, but since the victors tell the history, the “heroic” Syaians defeated the evil Tuffles, and overtime Sayians actual became goodies because of their belief in their history as heroes? Literally no one would know the truth except Yoji.

I would not be surprised if- working with the characters as cannon from the anime- he would make use of Frost, manipulating him and inevitably taking over his body (Sorry Icejinlover) and since I love the idea his presence can cause physical changes in the host (ala the white hair and red line on Vegeta), he would definitely make Frost look a bit less like his usual self to try getting around Frost’s wanted status. Also, given that Yoji can definitely peek into someone’s mind he would realize there are Sayians in different universes and would quickly determine his best bet is to bide his time in U6, but this could also be the start of the villain redemption arc (for both? Probably)

He may or may not be on the fence from the start given that he knows how kind Cabba is, and last I was aware Calfia and Kale were doing the whole Robin Hood thing? Why yes I do refuse to look that up so I’m running with that. Yoji would actually see that this generation of Sayians are goodies, but he’s still dependant on his programming (Like our man Cell) so he’s not exactly going to stray from it too easily. Independence and freewill is terrifying to Babe.

There’d be some nasty skirmishes but not quite enough to make Champa do anything about it, because how else would the U7 team be made to have adventures and explore the other universe? Seriously, I really loved GT and what little I watched of the OG dragon ball, the exploration was awesome.

So via a combination of Yoji killing U6 Sayians and not even the likes of Hit being able to stop the sneaky bugger Goku and Vegeta get pulled in to handle this. Except because of power creep, Yoji’s a major pain in the ass to try and get rid off- Still he gets knocked out of Frost which scares the hell outa him, but being much stronger now he catches several people off guard when doing his mind control stuff. And for dramatics sake we don’t see him when he hitches a ride on literally anyone to get into U7.

He’d probably watch how Goku and Vegeta are goodies with their families and start struggling to justify his actions. Maybe he even briefly gets to talk with Piccolo? Maaaaaybe? Also the Gammas and Hido. (I just love the Gammas so much, fite me)

still just for funsies He might try to grab Broly and that goes about as poorly as one could expect and at that point he starts having the break down.

Either he regains his composure and stays a villain (completely valid and what would most likely happen to him at this point in the timeline) or after everything he’s witnessed now that he’s no longer in isolation he attempts to make amends for the bullshit he’s pulled. And oddly enough Vegeta’s probably the person he can relate to the most, one some level, and actual kinda helps him. (I like Vegeta’s journey of maturing and slowly moving past his trauma in super… Yes I think it’s mostly in super. He relaxes by the end of Z, but Whis and Beerus’s constant presence I feel is helping him to find inner peace)

Now… Because I love my boy so much, and just because this is how I feel- He’d be kicked out of U6 after apologizing and he’d just be absorbed into the U7 fold given how many badies have turned into goodies… and would occasionally hitch rides to Beerus’s planet for the joy that is taking instruction from Whis for the same kinda inner peace training.

[angstfactory]

As the female before him visibly shrank in some, like all the emotions just fizzled out of her, Jesse kept his eyes on her even as she did her best to study anything but him in return. After all of that, he wasn't sure he would ever be able to see her as this hard shell of a person again-- which, actually, may be a good thing. Because it served a good reminder to the man that not everyone was like him. They all handled their response traumas differently, they all carried it ways that best suited for them to get through their days. Her bad days were different to his bad days. It was only too easy to brush aside if Kara would be hurt by all of this, to think she could tolerate or stomach it, simply because she was so tough on the outside.

Clearly, she wasn't as stony and unaffected as she came off. Or maybe Jesse hadn't been paying as good attention to her. Whatever the reason, his perception of her had changed. Sure, she was still this no-nonsense detective badass who wouldn't take anyone's shit -- obviously -- but inside, she was just as much an emotional wreck as the rest of them. She was able to hide it better. He only hoped that all the stupid things that had come flying out of his mouth, hadn't caused irreparable damage. Every interaction with someone... It all left some imprint, at least it did for him.

There was more there, though. Jesse wasn't going to refute her claims that she cared about him anymore, no. That was plain as day now, Kara considered him friend and took time out her schedule to bother to make sure he was still alive. But Jesse didn't for one second, believe that all of that upset she just spewed back at him, was all for him or over him. That was... who knew how long of bottled up emotional damage this woman had taken on, before his bullshit just finally tipped the scales and caused some to dump out.

"I wouldn't feel sorry now if I didn't," Jesse spoke up, because it was just the damned truth of the matter. "I'm backwards." He backed up a step or two, until his bottom found purchase on the edge of a carcass of fridge pushed onto its side. His hands came to brace on either side of him, curling around its edges. "I do care," Jesse said quietly, shrugging. "I care," he stressed, "I care too much." About all of them, really. That was the fucking problem. He never wanted to be in this position, where he cared. It derailed everything and left him vulnerable, too. "I just.. I don't feel good enough to be your friend, I've got nothin' to fuckin' bring to the table except --" His arms spread wide briefly, as he looked down at himself then back up at her, and the junkyard they stood in. "How do I prove it?" Jesse asked then, at a loss. "What do you want me to say?"

He admitted she was right. He apologized for everything that came out of his mouth. He regretted all of it. He even info dumped some things Jesse normally didn't tell anyone, about why he was the way he was. "C'mon, Kara," Jesse groaned, "I'm already over here with my ass hangin' out."

She deflated once she'd finished speaking with one long exhaled breath. She wasn't even sure at this point that any of it had made any sense at all, she'd just let it all come out at once guided by her emotion. And then she just stood there, staring at him, as he seemed to have nothing much to say in response. And when he finally did speak up, it didn't really give her anything to respond to. Just agreements and pleasantries to try and smooth over the hurt he'd caused. Things about how he'd been hurt in the past, so clearly everyone in the world was out to get him.

Kara rubbed the back of her hand across her eyes, looking away from Jesse towards his beat up truck, the mounds of junk that was piled up in the distance, anything other than him. Her arms folded over chest, finally looking to him again with a blank expression. She didn't know what to say, really. Because she didn't owe him shit. He was right about that. And if caring about him was just going to end up with him lashing out at her for no good reason again...well. He'd spent his last straw.

"Why do you care what I think or do?" she said finally. "You made it real clear we aren't friends. You sure don't act like you care about me." He said a whole lot of things that didn't even seem to indicate he liked her as a person. So why in the world did he even want a mulligan? Maybe he didn't even know what caring about another person even meant.

[elviratheepic]

Idk if I'll stick with this, but I've been in hospital for over a week now and I can feel my brain turning to mush, so I'm thinking it might be good to post like a journal thingy here. I can just throw my thoughts to the void and if anyone feels like throwing any thoughts back at me, maybe I'll reminded what human interaction is lol

And who knows, maybe some bits and pieces of my experiences rn might be handy to someone who ends up seeing it. This is a weird time for me, maybe someone else around here's having, has had or will have some similar weird times and we'll have made a little connection even if we don't speak :)

I mentioned it briefly in a post on my art blog, but to flesh it out a bit, I've been generally run down and really quite unwell like all summer and now into autumn. Been back and forth to the doctor, told I have chest infections, possible asthma, etc. I get booked in for an xray and then something looks weird so a ct scan, still thinking it's pneumonia with some odd symptoms, then a couple days later I get a call from my doctor telling me i am going to the hospital asap, there's a bunch of fluid in my chest that should not be there and also they need to check for lymphoma. I've never been to hospital for more than an orthodontist appointment and while not as surprised as I could be expected to be by the thought of cancer due to having had a weird anxiety fixation thing on the idea for a while (fun coincidence), it was still a bit of an ordeal lol. This was 10 days ago and I have not been home since. I've been coping pretty well considering the wild lack of control I feel over literally anything rn. The steroids they've got me on rn while I wait for further treatment have me feeling better than I have in a long while, and mentally the worst I've been dealing with is some fairly mild dissociation. Just kind of taking things as they come for now, rolling with things as best I can especially while so many things are kind of a bit up in the air and subject to change.

But I mean drama aside, the current diagnosis for me is pretty good. The cancer as it appears right now is treatable and has a pretty great cure rate. It's a "primary mediastinal large B-cell lymphoma" according to the leaflet I've got. It's high grade, so fast acting and aggressive but that actually makes these easier to get rid of than low grade slower working ones. It's hanging out next to my heart so that's the reason I've had all these bullshit symptoms in my chest cuz it's just been fuckin shit up in there and irritating its roommates. They've got me booked in for a pet scan day after tomorrow cuz the scanner was having issues so they couldn't get me in sooner, then the plan is to start chemotherapy the next day. Which will be an experience. The treatment plan we've basically already decided is 6 21-day cycles of chemo where I'll be in hospital for about 5 days getting monitored and adjusted treatment, then going home for the rest and coming back to start the cycle again. It's not going to be the most fun and easy experience of my life but tbh I've done hard things before and I know I'm capable of doing this. Not that this kind of thing can ever really come at a "good" time, but I think that personally I'm pretty lucky this came along at the point in my life it did. I've been able to spend the last couple years basically building myself back up from feeling entirely lost, shattered and directionless after a pretty traumatic attempt at university durring covid lockdowns. I'm maybe lacking in some life experience people my age tend to have, but ultimately I have confidence, strength and self-awareness now that I do not take for granted. Basically I got the chance to reinforce my foundations in unkowing preparation for this whole thing. Honestly, I'm kind of just curious who I'll be on the other side of this experience - wherever that may be.

My main concern has been my siblings. I'm the oldest of 3 and we're all very close, spend a lot of time together and are at the core of eachothers' support systems. One of them's got college stress and deadlines, the other's out of school with anxiety issues rn, and my instinct is to be there as a support. And of course they would be supporting me too, it's not all give, they're amazing at being there for me too especially while I've been unwell (I love them so so much and I'm proud of everything they do can you tell lol). But while they have been visiting when they can, we don't get so much time together rn with me being in hospital and I feel like it's hard to get a gauge on how things really are with eachother at the moment which is rough with there being so much change going on rn. I know we'll figure things out, but I can't help worrying about them a bit, I feel like it's kind of my job lol

Oof can you tell it's getting late and my brain's going sleepy ramble mode? Idk if I'm even making much sense but hey

The ward I've been moved to for this is good. It's a cancer ward for teens and young adults with a common room area funded by the teenage cancer trust. There's guitars, a ps4, craft supplies and free snacks. It feels so weird that like that space is for me to use, like I'm kinda tresspassing on something for people who need it more than I do. But the ward's fairly quiet and not so busy at the moment, so when my siblings and briefly my friend came to visit me today, we basically had free reign of the space without having to disturb anyone. I feel more comfortable in there than I did, and I think it's a good space for my siblings to be when they come visit. I'm really greatful they get to use it with me - even if I feel kind of like others deserve the space more (ik im being silly), seeing them get good use and some fun out of it today was good and reassuring. It's reassuring to hear people talking about there being support systems for siblings too should they need them. Especially when it feels like I can't look out for them so much in the ways I normally would.

But yeah, I think that's about all that's in my brain for right now. I'll look back on this tomorrow and realise none of this actually made any sense lol

But yeah basically got thrown a bit of a curveball lately as life tends to do, but there's answers now where there wasn't before, and the path ahead's starting to make itself visible. It sucks, but I've been worse. I'm not just saying that for the sake of offsetting the fact that it sucks, I'm just taking the the little wins where i can cuz I know that's gotten me through plenty rough and sucky times before.

Some little wins:

Woke up to magpies outside the window this morning. One came right up to the glass to say hi, but I couldn't snap a picture in time lol <3

My friend brought me a rainbow sensory slug companion, and I made a pipecleaner creature named Spigley while my siblings were here. They are friends and will be my chemo companions :)

(Idk if that's a mouth or a moustache but i think it suits him either way)

[absolutepokemontrash]

I come bearing a request! The Brothers with an MC who's really good at cooking and baking? Like, the stuff food blogs dream of. Master-level instagram pastries. Could compete with the chocolate guy if they put their mind to it.

👀 ooooo, I do love me some pastries-

(I know you have an *ahem* distaste for Lucifer, dear moot, so enjoy Lucifer acting like a bit of a dingus in his section!)

Lucifer

Oh, the human can cook. *insert asshole eyeroll here*. Great. Wonderful. Groundbreaking. That’s what’s got all his brothers acting like- what was that word Levi used? Simps? This human has turned six of the seven rulers of hell into a bunch of simps.

Sure, the human has near godlike cooking prowess. Sure, everyone looks forward to their day for cooking. And sure, everyone thinks the human’s pretty great.

Tsk, not him though. He’s a refined demon. Some silly food isn’t going to make him a lovesick fool… did he smell eclairs..?

Lucifer peered into the kitchen to see MC carefully taking a tray of eclairs out of the oven and letting them cool off on the counter. His favourite dessert… right there in front of him…

Due to not being a total moron, MC notices Lucifer and asks him what the hell he’s doing just standing ominously in the doorway. Lucifer makes up some bullshit excuse about reminding MC to do their homework and just leaves. Okay, game plan, he needs those fucking eclairs or he will spontaneously combust.

As he snuck into the kitchen that night, Lucifer took a moment to briefly wonder why he was creeping around his own house. He was the Avatar of Pride for pity’s sake! He could eat whatever he damn well pleased! Oh shit was someone coming- no? Okay, back to sneaking.

Lucifer crept into the kitchen, saw the eclairs, and all logic was thrown out the window. Time to eat!

“BEEL NO! NOT THE- Lucifer..?” “…” “…” “…you’re very talented, MC, do you mind making more of these?”

SOMEONE SNAP A PICTURE! THIS IS THE CLOSEST LUCIFER HAS GOTTEN TO BEGGING IN THE LAST THOUSAND YEARS!

Mammon

Ugh, stuck babysittin’ some dumb human, how lame…

As Mammon was throwing a “I’m broke and I’m stuck in a pact with a dumb human” pity party, the most heavenly smell entered his nostrils. Cooking… good cooking… was Barbatos visiting or somethin’? Nah, Lucifer woulda made a big fuss about gettin’ ready for Lord Diavolo. Huh, so what was goin’ on in the kitchen?

Huh? The human? The human can cook? Well damn, maybe this whole deal wouldn’t be so bad. Oi! MC! As payment for babysittin’ ‘em, he got to have an extra big share of- OW!

Did- did the human just hit him with a spoon?! Th-they can’t do that!

Apparently they fucking can. Mammon gets told to sit the fuck down and wait for the food like everyone else. He grumbles on the way to the dining room, but he can’t fully hide his excitement to try the food.

The food even looked pretty! How did they do that?! Magic. It had to be!

After everyone’s tastebuds were blessed with the heavenly substance that is MC’s culinary exploits, Mammon decides he needs to get on this human’s good side in order to receive more food! Maybe even find some way to make a profit or somethin’!

After weeks go by of trying to suck up to the human without looking like too much of a chump, Mammon eventually realizes… hey, this human ain’t so bad. They’re nice, they make him feel good about himself, they give him headpats… he’s really hit the jackpot here!

He’ll offer to help MC bake or cook, but beware, he will try and sample the food before it’s done. Don’t let him lick the spoon!!!

Leviathan

First thought? This human ain’t shit. Thought after seeing their food? WOAAAAAAAH! JUST LIKE THAT ONE ANIME-

He was unceremoniously cut off by Beel asking demanding seconds. Humph, fine, he doesn’t actually care about this dumb normie food anyway.

…well at least until Levi saw a little something something on TV that he just had to ask MC to try and make. He shyly knocked on their door and when they answered, Levi shoved the screenshot in their face and stuttered out a dinner request.

On the day MC was supposed to make dinner, Levi poked his head into the kitchen and tried to make it look like he was just standing in the same room as MC and not checking to see if they were making his dinner request.

Not that he’d blame them for not doing that… who’d wanna make some anime dinner for a yucky Otaku- OMG JAHSHSHABA THEY’RE MAKING IT! *fangirl squeals*

As Levi continues to commit the SIN of being in the kitchen at the same time as someone else, MC eventually just asks him if he’d like to help out.

“Here! Just keep turning the takoyaki.” “R-really? You trust me?” “Yes, Levi. You watched how they made it on your show, right?” “Yes! I won’t mess up! I swear on my honour as an otaku!”

All in all, it was a very cute bonding experience for the two. Now it’s a regular thing. Levi requests something for dinner or dessert, MC makes it, Levi helps out.

Satan

So, the human can cook. That’s nice. At least someone in this literally god forsaken house can.

He makes sure to thank MC every time they cook, then he makes sure to thank whatever deity is watching over him that Solomon wasn’t the human staying with them.

As the months progress, Satan realizes, he should learn how to cook better. I mean, Levi and Mammon were somehow both improving in their cooking endeavours, and if MC could teach those two, then he would be a breeze.

Satan walked into the kitchen and simply asked if MC needed any assistance with what they were doing. MC just slid him some garlic to dice and that’s how this mentor/student relationship was formed.

Satan was a star pupil, but Mammon and Levi weren’t above trying to sabotage Satan’s progress to get him to leave.

Here’s the thing, the sabotage worked, but it only worked once, and the two idiots didn’t stop to think that maybe they shouldn’t sabotage the meal they were going to have to eat later.

Well, cooking lessons continued uninterrupted after the ghost pepper incident…

Even when he’s ‘graduated’ their little cooking class, Satan’s always willing to lend a hand if needed. He also will slyly hand over some recipe books and cute baking supplies that he finds. MC should be prepared for lots of cat related things to come their way.

Asmodeus

The human can cook? Oh frabcious day! He’s saved from a life of his brother’s mediocre cooking! And the human’s so cute too! What a bonus!

Not only is the human cute, but their food is just so… aesthetic??? Pretty???? Omigosh he just has to get a picture for Devilgram!

For the first few months, MC’s relationship with Asmo consists of Asmo not at all subtly asking to take pictures of their food and post it to his Devilgram. Listen MC, his followers would just love it!

Being the saint-sheep they are, MC lets Asmo sit in whenever they’re making anything in the kitchen. And Asmo slowly realizes “hey, this cute human with the awesome food is actually pretty cool too!”

New Mission: Make the human fall madly in love with him so they’ll want to hang out more.

Whether the mission succeeds is up to MC of course. (I mean, I’m already smitten with him sooooooooo-)

MC offers Asmo a lot of the pastries they make, but the Avatar of Lust almost always declines. Listen honey, he’s on a diet- wait, don’t make that sad face! He’ll eat it! Look! It’s- it’s delicious…

Diet cheat day is now every day MC makes dessert. The feeling of bliss Asmo gets when he takes a bite out of anything MC makes is only second of the treats is second only to the joy he feels at seeing MC happy that he likes their food. It’s just so wholesome I can’t-

MC’s food Devilgram has almost surpassed Asmo in terms of followers and honestly- he isn’t even mad.

Beelzebub

Gasp! Lucifer finally got him the pet personal chef he’d always wanted! Thanks big bro! :D he’ll be sure not to eat this human!

On the first night MC was supposed to make dinner, Lucifer needed to hold Beel back from breaking into the kitchen to see what was causing that heavenly smell. It was, difficult… especially because Lucifer hadn’t slept in three days.

When they all sat down to eat, Beel practically inhaled everything and held up his half bitten plate for seconds.

We here at Stupid Headcanons incorporated recommend that MC have as many bodyguards as possible stationed around the kitchen at all times to ward off a hungry Beel. We don’t want him eating the ingredients and half-tempered chocolate.

A cinnamon roll through and through, he’ll eat everything MC gives him with a big ol’ smile on his cute little face. He’s not the best person to go to if MC wants advice or critique because the best thing Beel can usually muster is “it was really good.”

As Luke said in Lesson 5, Beel would make an awful food reporter. But we love him.

Similar to Levi, he’ll give meal requests on what to make for dinner. (At this rate, MC’s going to have to make some kind of list).

He kind of just waits by the door like a sad puppy whenever MC is making anything because he can’t get into the kitchen :(

Belphegor

The smell of freshly made chocolate chip cookies wafting through the house did reach the attic and it only fuelled his rage more. How dare the human win everyone over with cookies?!

After the attic incident, Belphie was won over with cookies.

Belphie just stands creepily in the kitchen doorway whenever MC is making anything and just makes shit really uncomfortable. Why’s he doing that, you may be wondering, well, he’s trying to calculate the energy needed to swipe the bowl of cookie dough and sprint to safety.

He never succeeds, mainly because once he gets to the bowl, MC already has the wooden spoon ready to smack him, so he just freezes mid-theft and slowly puts the bowl down.

“Oh my gosh, it says let the bread dough rest overnight? Let’s get a headstart and go to sleep now.” “Belphie what-” “I made a pillow Fort, come in. Let’s sleep.” “In the kitchen????”

How’d he make the pillow Fort without MC noticing? Years of experience. He’s trained in the art of- MC? What do you mean you can’t sleep right now and you need to get a head start on shaping fondant?

…he may have eaten the fondant while MC wasn’t looking… whoops… Beel may have rubbed off on him a little…

[mortytheestallion]

tasting glass

Part 2   Part 3

Rating: 18+ (No minors); explicit 

Wordcount: 1.6k

Warnings: Rick Sanchez x F!Reader, angst, implied age gap, unprotected sex, daddy kink

A/N: Hello I’m back from the dead, I know I’ve been lacking on both fandoms but my hyperfixations have died. In honor of season 5 here’s a new little mini-series I’m challenging myself to this summer! This takes place in between episodes 2 and 3!

The summer heat was humid and sticky as Rick finished his latest project. The sweltering seemed to permeate the garage just the same with the door opened or closed, and with Beth and Jerry’s latest fight reaching its peak, he decided hiding away was his best bet. 

Rick and the heat did not get along well, something that translated to the rest of the family, it felt as though he was fending off Summer and Morty with a stick. Their boredom was not his problem though, he had much better things to do. The thought of slipping away had plagued his mind for the last few hours, but the fever of the summer seemed to make his mind feel like syrup. 

“What I wouldn’t fucking give for a pool right now?” Rick murmured to himself, his brow furrowing at the reminder of his own sticky misery. The sky bathed the house in a silky red with the sun slipping down under the horizon. He took another sip from his flask, turning to lean on the workbench. 

He heaved a deep sigh as his phone caught the corner of his eye, you were ignoring him, and in true Rick fashion he had taken that in stride. His eyes narrowed unconsciously as he thought about it, his empty hand tightening into a fist. He didn’t fucking need you.

 He didn’t need anybody.

Beth’s shrill voice cut through the air followed by some thuds and an “Ow!” from Jerry. That earned an eye roll from Rick and while he wouldn’t mind going in there and tearing them a new one, it was too much work. Morty was breathing down his neck about letting them be, that they were happy. He had scoffed when Morty said that, it was bullshit and he wouldn’t be surprised if someone wanted another divorce in the next 6 months. 

Nonetheless, he was stuck in this stuffy house with his family’s bullshit to avoid your bullshit and he was starting to feel suffocated. Why did he give a shit if you were mad, fuck if you wanted to play that game so would he. Maybe it was the liquor he had just downed but it really didn't take much to get Rick riled up. And you knew that. 

He could feel the anger blooming in his chest, he wasn’t some fucking teenager in a petty fight with some dumb, little girlfriend. Suddenly he was hot with anger and before he knew it, a portal was in the center of the floor and he was walking through. Damned be his new fibermesh epidermis defense, and fuck his family, always asking him for shit. 

One foot through he stopped and thought of you briefly softening, he had been pretty rough on you lately. You called, he declined. You showed up, he went out the nearest portal. He had really only been around lately to take care of his own needs.

A particularly loud curse from inside the house brought him right back to his original train of thought, he was the smartest man in the universe, he didn’t need to take crap from you. You should be thanking him for his presence in your life. 

“You have some fucking nerve.” 

You shrieked as Rick pulled back the shower curtain. A cold shower was one of the better ways to fend off the heat with the air conditioner broken, especially since Rick had moaned, groaned, and wormed his way out of fixing it. 

“What the fuck are you doing?” You hissed as he climbed in fully clothed, his brow in a prominent V-shape, lids half mast. It would have been comical in any other situation, his lanky body struggling to fit in your small shower, an almost bored expression on his face as the water drenched his clothes. 

“Me?” Rick scoffed, and narrowed his eyes at you. He began to lose his composure a bit, having your wet naked body in front of him. 

“Yes, you. You can’t just barge in here unannounced anymore Rick. I’m not some toy you can pick up when you’re bored and throw it away when you’re not.”

He feigned a hurt look, shrugged the now soaked coat from his shoulders. “I have enough toys, sweetheart, if you were one you’d know.”

That earned a huff from you, it had been a long day and the last thing you needed was Rick’s bullshit. Turning back to face the water, you rinsed the rest of the soap off of you, jumping slightly as his arms snaked their way around your waist. 

“C’mon,” he murmured, pressing kisses to your shoulder, you could feel the hard press of cold denim against your ass as he ground into you, “you know you can’t refuse my huge dynamite penis.” 

That earned a snort from you, the hard shell of anger cracking slightly. “You’re not off that easy, Rick. You’ve been a huge asshole lately, even more than usual.” 

His hands came up to massage your breasts, the feeling amplified by the cold water. You let out a low moan as he latched his mouth to the sweet spot on your neck while one hand tweaked your nipple, and the other snuck its way down to stroke your fluttering core. 

“S-shit baby you can’t still —is this all for me?” You could feel his wolfish grin against the back of your neck, and in return you arched your back more to grind against his erection. His long fingers trace through your folds as he removes his other hand to undo his belt, you feel the tight heat in your lower belly as you gush around his fingers. 

“Fuck,” Rick murmurs, stopping his motions momentarily to land a hard smack on your ass. You bite back a whine, wanting to maintain some semblance of composure, despite him being knuckle-deep in you. His fingers suddenly press against something deep and spongy within you, your knees buckle as you lurch forward, the unexpected waves of pleasure shivers down your body. Rick lets out another curse, his arm darting out to grip your waist, surely you would’ve fallen face-first into the wall had he not been holding you up.

He inhales sharply as you clench around his fingers, whispering good girl into your neck as you ride it out. He eases out of you, your juices dripping down your thighs, the feeling coupled with the uncomfortable chill of the water makes you shudder. 

“You’re a dirty little slut,” you tense again as he aligns himself to your entrance, still a little sensitive from your release, “beg me baby, I-I want to hear you.”

You mewl as he pushes into you, the stretch rides the line of pleasure and pain, Rick barely gives you enough time to get used to it before he bucks his hips and grips your jaw as a warning, “Beg.”

“Please, Rick, I want — I want you to fuck me,” your voice comes out whiny making you wince a bit, but it seems to please Rick as he sets a deep pace, biting into your neck hard enough it's sure to leave a mark.

You can’t help but arch your back even further, this seems to please him as he releases his bite on your neck, “Someone’s eager, y-you can’t seem to get enough of my dick can you?” You moan in response, snaking a hand down to rub the tender bundle of nerves. 

You clench at the contact, leading Rick to fasten his pace, his hand moving to tighten around your neck. 

“You’re my — you’re daddy’s good girl aren’t you? Can’t get enough of m-my monster cock, you wanna come don’t you? Don’t fucking dare, not until I say so.”

All you can manage is incoherent moans with the occasional Rick! thrown in, you’re too cockdumb to be embarrassed or angry anymore. Rick has his way of getting out of trouble, especially with you. 

His brutal pace coupled with your own fingers becomes too much for you as you near your second orgasm, Rick seemed to egg you on as his own fingers replaced yours, you could feel your stomach tightening as your release began to stir in the peak of your stomach. 

“Come on my dick, baby, let the neighbors hear you scream my name.”

The pleasure washes over you in waves, your pussy clenching hard around his dick, he thrusts with wild abandon chasing his own release. You can feel him rut against your sensitive walls, riding your post-orgasmic haze. He spills inside you a few moments later letting out a string of expletives in true Rick fashion. You feel yourself stir again slightly as you feel him fill you up, but Rick extracts himself from you gracelessly. 

Coming back to your senses you rinse the mixture of juices off your legs, much to Rick’s distaste, and turn off the water. You shiver from being drenched for so long, side-eyeing Rick as he avoids your gaze. 

“You’re dripping on my floor,” you murmur, he stands there uncomfortably, it's not lost on you that his portal gun has returned to his hand.

“Well, I-I should go.”

“Typical.”

Rick can feel the anger simmer low in his belly at your dig, “What do you mean typical?”

“Well let’s see Rick, you show up angry and unannounced, seduce me in my show—” “I didn’t seduce you! And —and frankly, I resent the accusation!” “And now you’re leaving with no explanation. This isn’t sustainable long term, Rick.”

“And what makes you think I want to be here long term,” He regrets the words as soon as they leave his mouth, a hurt look flashes across your face before it's replaced with anger. 

“Come on, baby, I-I didn’t mean it.” 

He reaches out for you and you jerk backwards, “Your family may have taken you back, but I’m not this time Rick.” 

He opens his mouth, but you cut him off, “Just go, it’s what you’re best at.”

Rage blinds him as he shoots a portal to the floor, “Don’t — I’m not coming back this time.”

“I know you're not.” And with that he’s gone.

[familyofpaladins]

@sonderquill thank you!!! Yeah the Pacific Rim au and treasure planet/island au are a couple of my favorites and are always kinda simmering on the back burners of my mind lol.

Your own au's? 👀 SHARE SHARE! YES I am infecting you with story brainrot muhahaha!! >:3 (seriously tho, I'd love to hear your ideas!!)

The three other "could be canon but also not canon" ideas are below because once again this got long lol

Hop skip and a jump away - (literally just made up that title lol) Sainw au were don spends 30-40 years (however long the time difference was in SAINW) trying to get back home. (Sorta same background as the Turtleverse au, but has a different end game)

As he hops between dimensions he learns more about them, but at first it takes him to random places and it takes a while for him to figure out how to get closer to his own world.

He gets caught up with helping people along the way as well, and sometimes he seems to jump forward and backward in time as well.

Eventually he figures out that each universe/dimension has it's own unique frequency and that you can trace an object/persons dimension by scanning the quantum frequency (I am bullshiting science here).

But by the time he figures that out, his own frequency has changed enough from hopping dimensions that hmthe cant trace his original dimension anymore. But he has a "direction" to aim for, and tries as many of them as he can.

This would be when he has the most run ins with other turtle verses.

At one point he thinks he's got his universe! Because his brothers are there! And they're looking for him!

But it turns out it's the regular 03 universe, and they're just waiting for regular donnie to come back from a regular trip or soemthing (or maybe he was briefly captured).

Both Don's may or may not get to have a conversation where 03 donnie realizes where SAINW Don is from, and tells him about what happened.

Sainw Don is devastated to learn about the fate of his brothers, but tries to keep hope that maybe… it wasnt his universe, or that he'll be able to his universe before the events of sainw to help.

03 tries to find hope in that but is still worried that it's just too late.

Sainw don leaves to keep trying to find home.

Theres also like. This Null Dimension (kinda like Renets 79th dimension of Null Time, but it's just the space between realities) where its easiest to locate a Dimesnion Frequency and go there.

He has a little radar thing to scan with. If theres activity between dimensions there are spikes of that frequency.

After his conversation with 03 Donnie, he keeps an eye out for the spikes that could indicate 03 Don's travel to and from the other universe.

Finally one day, a little blip pops up (03 don going to the sainw) and he realizes that that's it. It's his home, but it's gone before he can pinpoint it.

But then it pops up again (03 don going home) and he's ready for it. He pinpoints the frequency and makes it to the dimension. He knows he's home as soon as he gets there. Can literally feel it in his bones (his molecules)

He arrives literally moments after 03 Don left. April is shocked to see him. His brothers are bleeding on the ground.

… Don has learned a lot traveling dimensions. How to hop between them. How to bend them to your will on occasion in small ways.

Because space and time are often intertwined, so using his technology in a science way that he could explain but I cannot (lol) (and maybe some mystic magic he learned along the way as well) he's able to reverse some of the injuries his brothers got, so they are no longer dying.

ALL THE BROTHERS ARE BACK AND NO ONE IS DYING.

That's. That's the au. I bring SAINW Donnie back and he saves his brothers.

(this next part was also supposed to be bullet points, but tumblr formatting is giving me fits, so I'm leaving it as is)

Pressing Play- this au/story/canon continuation has been on my mind a lot lately, have even actually written a little of it down.

But it takes place a little while after the turtles go home in the fast forward season, in 2105 (or more like 2106).

Cody is trying to uncover all of his uncle's, Darius Dunn's, dirty dealings in O'Neil Tech, as well as trying to find his uncle and also learn how to live by himself.

Well one day he finds a room that he never knew existed before, turns out it used to be one of his grandparents' personal labs, but had been locked by Darius after their death.

He goes in the room and it's mostly just computers and project files and blueprints.

But there is one machine that's still on and running. Cody doesnt know what it does, so he figures "well if Darius kept it hidden away, it's probably not good. Or if it is soemthign important they'll figure it out if it gets shut off".

So he shuts it off. Nothing much seems to happen. So goes about his day.

Well, a little while later, the air opens into a portal, and out step four 100 year old turtles. :)

the turtles arent dead, theyve just been stuck in another dimension for the last 15ish years (but it was only around a year or two for them thanks to weird time displacement between the dimensions).

The turtles have done a lot in their lives, saved the Earth several times over, fought bad guys here and across space.

The turtles and Cody's grandparents (Casey and April's child) were testing a new kind of portal device to explore other dimensions.

The Jones were suppose to monitor the connection and check in with the guys every so often. While they explored where ever they went.

But about around 6 months (of a 1 year plan) into one of the dimensions, The Jones' died in an accident while helping deliver supplies to somewhere.

And Darius Dunn saw an opportunity. His brother had married April and Casey's granddaughter.

See. The Turtles knew to be wary of Darius thanks to their trip to the future, but they dont really meet him very often and he hasnt Done Anything, so they just plan to keep an eye on him when his brother starts dating their Niece.

Darius has noticed that they watch him like a hawk and he doesn't like that because he does plan to use his brother to have influence in ONeil tech.

One time his brother invites him to take a tour of Oneil tech after about a year of being married. While on this tour they show off the Dimension machine and how it works.

They they can tune in to different dimensions, and that the guys would be able to come back on their own with their own devices, but it helps them to have basically a "light house to lead them back",

but that they should be able to come back no matter what as long as the machine ISNT broadcasting the wrong signal, which would act like a jamming signal.

Dunn doesnt care much but he does file it away in his brain because he's sure the turtles will cause him trouble.

Then Cody's grandparents die. It was truly an unfortunate accident. But it gets the gears turning in Darius's head when his brother announces the birth of his son and that his wife is now the new CEO.

The death of Cody's Parents is officially ruled as a tragic accident. (But it was far from it)

With the new heir to the company a mere baby, and as the only living kin, Darius acts as head of company. (And as acting ceo he has access to everything in the company and it doesnt take much to gain access to the Dimesion portal machine and and interfere with the broadcasting signal to make it impossible for the turtles to return and then lock the door).

Anyway. The events of fast forward happen.

(The turtles go back to the past)

Cody finds an old room with an old machines and suddenly the turtles can finally come home. :)

Cody and the turtles reunion is a little hectic. (Both sides think the other is someone breaking in to the apartment lol. )

Cody is so glad to have them back and they work on finding Darius.

Also part of the au that I havent thought as much on so far is that, well. He loves the turtles and so glad to have them back. But the dynamic isnt quit the same as it was before, because the turtles arent the same energetic rambunctious teenage boys anymore (at least not as much lol).

SO when going after Darius and having more interactions with the dark turtles and the previous character development that had started in canon, the dark turtles become allies and friends and Cody has a new set of friends closer to his age :)

And then when Serling finally comes back home to the future, he comes back to TWO sets of turtles and feels a little bit of his robot soul die lol.

Why do so many of my stories has a lot of background lore plot and nothing for what's current events pffhskdhlshfjfoshjrjdks

And then theres

The Pizza Game- rottmnt apocalyptic future headcanons basically. Since we don't know a whole lot about what the future was like, I get to make up a bunch of stuff, so canon not canon lol.

But hey, guess what, THIS ONE IS A FIC THAT I ACTUALLY WROTE.

This fic basically answers some questions the movie made me ask. Like, "the turtles love pizza, how did they make it eating 'rats and leaves'", "given their love of pizza how did Casey Jr Not know what it was" (I get him never having eaten it before, but it seemed like he didn't even know the concept of it) and "why was the last thing future Leo said to Casey, was to grab a slice of pizza? Why was THAT on his mind?"

Featuring a whole bunch of headcanons about what I think the future was like and what happened to different characters.

One thing that I briefly mention in the notes of that fic, but didnt necessarily "canonize" in the fic because I left it open to interpretation, (but do plan to write it's own little oneshot) but I really like the idea, is that Casey Jones Junior is Cassandra Jones' clone.

I headcanon that one day, Cassandra and Draxum were fighting Krang and took temporary refuge in the Hidden City.

They were a bit drunk at the time (another headcanon that being drunk makes you immune to being krangified) and decided, "HEY, if there were an army of Cassandra's, theyd beat the Krang in no time!"

So they go to draxum's old place and decide to take her dna and clone her. (Also, I don't believe for a second that when draxum was originally mutating the turtles that he intended to raise children, so I think he had some way to stimulate growth and make them age faster, and that that would be used here as well).

But! Because the place is old and broken down and like, no source of power anymore, the thing doesnt work all they way and they end up with a (equivocally) 3year old Casey Jr.

By the time the process is done, Cassandra and Draxum have slept off the alcohol and are like, oh this was a terrible idea, good thing there was just one clone. And Cassandra goes "Its Free Son" and takes him back to their base where everyone else is FLABBERGASTED that they somehow came back with a kid lol.

But they take one look at those big eyes and fall in love, and he's immediately part of the family.

Its it supported by canon? No. Is it disputed by canon? Also no. So I'm keeping it :)

(From a post talking about how I make an au everytime I watch another movie)

Oh you're spoiling me @sonderquill by indulging me in my au's. Also careful what you wish for lol

Okay heres a list of different Tmnt Au's that I've made in my head!! :D

Princess bride au

My own tmnt iteration au =Youngest leo (and oldest Mikey, but I tend to focus on leo)

Turtleverse - not so much an au as.... a big ol crossover and filling in some gaps from canon

Pacific rim au- I was actually gonna do a tmaynt promt with this au, but I skipped it because it was giving me trouble but I might come back to it

Treasure planet/island au - set in space like treasure planet but I pull in a bit more of the plot/events from the book

brother bear au - setting and details a little iffy

Looking through my notes to double check my Au's, I apparently also had a pokemon au, but I dont really remember where I was going with it lol

And now, Princess and the frog turtle au

Longer descriptions under the cut because uh. It got long lol (most of these are personality and character based from 2003 series, but could also be from other series/general/non specific iteration as well)

Princess bride au and Youngest Leo Au have links to their own posts so I'm not gonna say much more about them on this post

Turtleverse- So this is .... mostly just a place for all the iterations to hang out and meet each other. Kinda like the place in Across the Spiderverse. Theres not much for plot, except. The turtle in charge of everything in the turtle verse is the Donatello who disappeared in Same as it Never Was (2003 series). In this au, that Don was experimenting with alternate dimensions and time travel and accidentally sent himself to another dimension. Because of where ever he was sent, it takes him a while to travel through dimensions and then spends years hopping from universe to universe trying to find home. But because of [science stuff that I'm going to blame on quantum physic even though that's probably not the right term] his body isnt tuned to his home dimension anymore, and so if he ever made it back he wouldnt be able to stay there. And/or by the time he makes it back the events of same as it never was have already happened. So instead, he "maps" out the other turtle universes and allows crossovers to happen and a big ole hang out. (Like I said before, theres not really a Plot, but if there was, itd would probably have somethign to do with Don being A Bit controlling of the different universes and them not messing with Canon Events (like Manuel in Spiderverse), because he knows 03 Don made it to his home dimension, and while 03 Don got his brothers tow work together and defeat shredder, Don's brothers died and SAINW Don holds that against 03 Don and dosnt want other turtles interfering with other universes. So the plot would be addressing... all that while probably also dealing with some other interdimensionalproblem)

Pacific Rim au- like I said, I hope to draw of this and explain it more there. But I'll go ahead and give a run down. This is a human au. The bros are 4 identical brothers that pilot the only four man jaeger. They can also pilot a normal two man jaeger in any combination. But one day when a kaiju that comes out of the rift is more powerful than they expect, it tears into their jaeger and Donnie gets ripped out. After they get their damaged jaeger back to shore and injuries taken care of. They search for Donnie but never find him and (logically) assume he died. What they dont know is that donnie miraculously made it to shore and got picked up by some locals. But Don got a head injury and doesnt remember who he is and no one else realizes that he's the jaeger pilot who was lost at sea. (The bros are fairly private and so their faces arent publicized, and after people from the jaeger program looked for donnie, they really figured he was gone ((okay actually there is debate between the brothers)) so they didnt keep up the search.) As for Donnie, he assumes he's just a person whose home was destroyed by the kaiju and that theres just no one left to look for him. A man that goes by the nickname Leatherhead, takes him in and as the years go by the work on building the wall to protect against kaiju attacks (Don does his own research on the kaiju on the side tho). Anyway. After Don is gone, they cant pilot the 4man jaeger anymore and work in teams of two. But because of disagreements about Don's fate (like how they argued in SAINW) they dont work quite as well together. So Raph and Casey are drift compatible . And Leo and Usagi are Drift compatible. Mikey probably Could drift with others (if I wanted to bring in Mondo gecko into the au theyd be drift compatible), but he's trying to make sure his bros stay together and works with them.

BUT. Mikey hurt his arm during a fight. (Maybe just broken, maybe loses it if I want to lean into the SAINW parallel) So he's benched for a while. With all the gossip of the 4 drift compatible brothers losing a member and getting new drift partners eventually photos of their faces get out there. Someone who works on the wall keeps up with jaeger pilot gossip and thinks, "hey that guy kinda looks like those pilots. Guess the jaeger program really is going to shit if one is retiring to work on the wall" and maybe jokes about it with others. Eventually a rumor starts that theres a retired jaeger pilot working there. Don, who is probably going by a different name but I havent decided what yet, doesnt pay much attention to rumors and if he Does here, absolutely doesn't think it's about him. He doesnt pay much attention to the jaegers and focuses more on the kaiju themselves. Anyway, Mikey ends up hearing the rumor (because he's bored when benched and so goes out and wanders and also is secretly working on rebuilding their 4man jaeger) and goes "well it's not me, and I know it's not Raph or Leo... ". So trying to keep his hope down in case it's not what he thinks, (because really, it's been 5 years. If it was donnie he would have come home. Right?) He goes to see who this look a like is. He goes to where the wall is being built and looks around for a while and is about to call it quits when he bumps into someone. Don does a double take at the person he bumped into because he was looking at his notes instead of where he was walking. Realizes he's probably in the way and apologizes and goes to walk around. Then Mikey, who was so stunned to suddenly run into his brother (who he knows is donnie. Even with the scar he can see peaking out underneath his hair on his temple) who has been Gone for Five Years. He stops Don and questions where he's been. Don is very confused doesnt know what to make of this person who looks such like him. Eventually they put it together that don has lost his memories and Mikey begs Don to come back with him. Don isn't really sure what to think, (could this really be his brother?), he doesn't know this guy and doesnt know if he believes the "yeah I'm your brother and you have 2 more identical brothers as well" and he has been gathering impressive data on the kaiju that he doesnt want to abandon. So mike goes, come see my brothers and you'll see and if nothing else, you can conduct proper research with other scientist there. So don says yes. (But really. After just a minute of talking with mikey, Don would have gone back with him because he could Feel a connection and he Has to figure out the truth of what happened to him). Anyway they go back, Don meets his other missing brothers, theres crying and hugs and apologies and awkwardness. They do a drift at some point and Thats what brings back all of Don's memories. Something something they end up saving the day. I havent thought much plot past the bros reuniting lol

(God that was long. sorry)

Treasure planet/island au- setting is in space like Treasureplanet, so the boys are turtles. But some plot/events and character roles taken from the book. Splinter and the bros help run an inn. Theyve all grown up hearing stories of the Pirate Krang and his hidden treasure. Someone comes to the inn with a map (I'm thinking baxter stockman. Possibly in this weird brain/tentacle form since this is space and I can use his weirder forms) and other pirates pancake the inn and burn it down with the bros barely escaping with the map. Casey is a friend of the family and they go to his house. Leatherhead is a doctor/scientist and was with the turtles at the time. Mikey and/or Don are messing with the map and are the ones to figure out how to open it. Once they realize they have Krang's Treasure Map, they set out to find it. Casey and leatherhead hire the crew. Leatherhead hires the well renown Captain April O'Neil with firstmate Traximus the triceraton. Casey hired the cook and his daughter who helped hire the rest of the crew. Oroku Saki is an utrom in an exo-suit "with a passion for cooking". His adopted daughter Karai is an excellent sailor. :) Anyway they set sail. April knows soemthign is up with the crew and doesnt trust them one bit. The turtles are slightly suspicious of Saki, but mikey likes cooking with him, Don is fascinated by his exo-suit, and Leo likes training with Karai, and is charmed by Saki's "Honor". Raph doesnt trust them at all, but has no proof for anything and his brothers seem okay with them so he keeps his temper down (as much as he can. He's raph tho lol) anyway. Leo (and mikey maybe?) eventually overhear Shredders real plans to create a mutant and take over the ship. The rest of the events are a little unplanned because it's a mix of book events and movie events and I didnt write down everything that I apparently originally thought of. But two of the brothers (originally wrote down Mikey and Raph but that might change) sneak off the ship to join the pirates pretending to think that they are still good loyal crew. They get away from the pirates and meet The Fugitoid, Professor Hunnicut, former navigator for the Pirate Captain Krang. Later 2 of the other turtle brothers (maybe leo and don?) Are trying to get the main ship back and have a epic fight with ... someone. Maybe hun or bishop and/or Karai. Idk. Like I said. Iffy plot points. Karai is the one who has a change of heart and helps the brothers. Also the pirates may not be after treasure so much as, say, a giant portal that can take them across the galaxy in the blink of an eye. Fugitoid may or may not have actually been the one to booby trap the planet so no one could use the technology again for evil.

Brother bear au- setting would probably change. but idk to what/where exactly. The brothers, when reach a certain age are given totems/amulets/soemthing(depends on setting) with a certain trait. Leo the oldest gets Guidance. Don second oldest gets Wisdom. And raph is supposed to get his. he gets Love. Gets mad about the animal he gets. (I havent fully decided if I'm sticking with the whole turning into a Bear thing and giving the eagle and wolf to leo and don. Or to turn raph into a turtle demon(like the ones from the ninja tribunal arc) because then I'm not sure what animal/creature to give to the rest of the brothers. Anyway). Mikey is the youngest and hasnt recieved his yet. things happen, Raph goes a bear/turtle monster and Leo does saving his brothers (I'm sorry leo 😭). Raph decides to go after the "monster" again, despite Don and mikey telling him not to. Raph goes out, kills it, and gets turned into said creature. Donnie who had followed after Rpah thinks his other brother has now died as well and decides he need to go after it as well. Mikey may or may not join him (I havent decided). Raph meets a young one along the way, and while I was originally thinking Tyler(? From lone raph and cub 2003) I think this would be a good spot for Spike/Slash. (I could also change it that mikey is the kid he picks up along the way, it could work. but I also like the idea of the 4 of them actually being brothers the whole time) anyway. travel shenanigans and raph realizing that the "monsters" arent monsters meanwhile Don is having A Time following the creature who killed two of his brothers.

Pokemon au- I'm just gonna screenshot what I have in my notes because I dont really remember where I was going with it lol

And then the newest addition to the Au's and what prompted that other post

Princess and the frog, I mean turtle- theres so many different ways I could go with this. But I think I'm leaning towards an au where, somehow, at least one of the brothers (who are mutant turtles) gets cursed into a normal turtle (because I think its funny). They're all trying to figure out how to break the spell/curse. They find April and think she is a princess whose kiss will break the spell, but she's not a real princess and ends up cursed too. So then they're ALL trying to figure out how to fix it. Havent decided if it's the situation from some of the original stories where the frog has to eat off the princess's plate three times, or kissed by a princess or "true loves kiss". But if it is the true loves kiss, I'm going the Platonic Love is just as true love as romantic love route.

This one hasnt been cooking in my mind as long so it's not as detailed, but I do like the idea of the turtles and april helping each other try to reverse the curse. (It could also be that casey and/or april got cursed originally and the turtles are there to help them find a solution. Or it could be that the brothers are supposed to be human and got turned into turtles/or turtle mutant)

So yeah, theres the different Tmnt Au's I have :)

[cambria-writes]

crawling gasping heaving

somehow i made it i did it i actually wrote it before the end of the day and before i have to go to bed for work tomorrow holy shit i honestly didn't think i'd be able to do it

i didn't take the time to proofread this so i'm probably gonna be correcting the living daylights out of this tomorrow, but here you go!

rating: M, each chapter rated individually warnings: soft eddie, swearing, there's guns but no shooting, reader's going a bit off the deep end, a lot of essentially pointless rambling that may or may not eventually be foreshadowing, billy mentioned a singular time, typos bound to appear word count: 4,458

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𝕮𝖍𝖆𝖕𝖙𝖊𝖗 𝕿𝖜𝖊𝖑𝖛𝖊: ℜ𝔢𝔪𝔬𝔳𝔢 ℭ𝔲𝔯𝔰𝔢

“Y’know that’s actually kinda hot,” you cough, parroting what you’d been told when you had pulled out your set of lock picks.

Robin steps in before Eddie can say anything, and there’s a quick back and forth before Steve eventually replaces him in the driver’s seat, once the thing has been successfully hotwired. You let them figure out the rest on their own while you make your way to the back of the RV to sit on the bed.

‘Stuck in the back of a speeding trailer with the awning still attached after your childhood best friend hotwired it just like his male genetic donor used to’ wasn’t exactly how you would’ve imagined the latter half of your spring break to go. Then again, you hadn’t entirely anticipated dimension hopping, either, or having to deal with what might potentially be the end of the world. 

Nancy had briefly caught you up to speed before the lot of you left to hijack someone’s home—and you’re desperately trying not to think about that for too long—and the entire thing left a sour taste in the back of your throat. Not just the world-endy bullshit, but the fact that Vecna slash Henry slash One had access to something you weren’t sure you could do.

Fucking divination. 

You’re digging your nails into the palms of your hands when Steve peels out of Forest Hills at a speed the RV you’re all crammed in would consider breakneck. There’s so much you haven’t tried, actually. And the more you think about it, the more you think that maybe you should’ve taken the asshole up on his offer. Maybe you should’ve let the stupid lich king teach you. 

Beyond the regret, though, as little as it may be, there’s a lot of contemplation. Dustin, Lucas and Eddie are chatting away, concocting some harebrained scheme probably, and with Robin and Nancy up front with Steve, you’ve got some peace of mind to think. Because thankfully, unlike her brother, apparently, Erica Sinclair is capable of recognizing when someone shouldn’t be bothered.

The idea of a phylactery had occurred to you, originally, when Eddie first brought up the concept of a lich. That even if you tried to kill him, it would just be a matter of time before he came back. What would the phylactery be, though? What could he have attached himself to so wholly and completely that he’d be willing to risk using it as a respawn point? 

When you look up from where you’re sat cross-legged on the bed in the back, you open your mouth to call for Nancy. You barely mutter the first consonant of her name when you notice that she and Steve seem to be… discussing, pretty intently. 

“H-hey, Robin?” 

“Huh? Yeah?” Robin answers quickly, turning around and shuffling her way to you, quickly whispering apologies to the kids for getting between them. “What’s up?” She asks, letting herself fall heavily next to you. 

“You went to Victor Creel’s house with the others, yeah?” 

“Creepy abandoned mansion, yeah,” she confirms, nervously drumming her fingers against her thighs. “What about it?” 

“Was there anything like…weird about that place? Anything that stood out?”

Robin frowns and hums for a second, turning to look down at her feet. “Something that stood out, huh…” There’s another moment of pause before she slaps her thigh and points at you. “We found the clock! The one you keep hearing, it was right there in the main hallway.” 

“Okay yeah, that does stand out.” But not exactly the kind of thing someone would bind their soul to, you figure. Way too obvious and easily spotted. “Anything else? Something maybe hidden? Like, a lot better?” 

Robin chuckles but nods, letting her head fall back and crossing her arms as she thinks. 

“We kind of split up, so it’s hard to tell but I heard Steve screaming like a girl. Something about spiders?” 

“It was a god damn black widow!” Steve shouts from the front seat, and you can’t help but stifle your laughter. 

“A black widow, alright. Where was it, do you know?” 

“Yeah, it was on the second floor. In the bathroom, I think? It was like, hidden under a vent in the floor ro something.” You frown and open your mouth to ask another question, but Robin excitedly flaps her hands. “Oh, oh! And there was this freaky shrine in the attic with a bunch of jars with spiders in them too!” 

“Oh wooow,” you say, putting as much nasally sarcasm into it as you can. “Love that. Spiders. Awesome. Anything else?”

“I don’t think so, place was pretty run down. I mean no one’s lived there since the Creels were murdered and I don’t think ‘home to a demonic serial killer who pops your eyes from the inside out’ sells too well.”

“Yeah, probably not,” you mutter, bringing your thumb up to chew at the nail. 

Something related to spiders would be way too obvious as a phylactery, right? Anyone with any kind of knowledge about Henry would be able to guess something like that. And though the grandfather clock does feel like a decently significant item, too, that’s beyond obvious. No way that someone like Vecna would use that as a phylactery, either. It’s too flammable, anyways. 

You squeak in surprise when Eddy drops himself on the bed on your other side. Robin quickly excuses herself to move back up front with Steve. You’re about to pull her back and tell her to give him room, but when you glance ahead it seems like whatever discussion he was having with Nancy is over. 

“What was all that about spiders?” Eddie asks, letting himself fall back on the bed with his hands behind his head. “I thought you hated spiders.”

“Ugh, god do I ever,” you groan, letting yourself fall back onto the mattress as well. “I’m just trying to figure out like. If I was a lich that ended up in a parallel dimension, right? What would I choose as the one thing to bind my soul to and make sure I can respawn?”

“You’d probably have better luck asking Wheeler,” he replies, end of his sentence fading into a yawn. “She’s the one he gave his weird psychic visions to.” 

“And you’re assuming he has a phylactery to begin with.” Dustin has his has steepled in front of him on the small table, leaning out just a bit to be able to look at you. You left yourself up on your elbows to look back at him and frown. 

“There’s no way he’d be able to survive in that place for as many years as he has without dying,” you state, closing your eyes for a second to try and recall the small fragments of conversation you were able to catch when you were In Between with Eleven. “He took control of that thing, right? The thing you call the mind flayer? What if that’s what turned him into whatever the hell he is now?” 

“That doesn’t really matter,” Lucas pipes up, turning around in his seat and throwing his arm up against the back of the bench-like seat to look at you. “If we cut him off from the mind flayer, he won’t be able to do anything, right?”

“Yeah, and then all hell breaks loose, genius,” Erica scoffs, and you can tell without looking at her that her eyes are rolling. “If Vecna’s the only one keeping the monsters in check, we’re screwed if they all decide to do whatever they want.” 

You groan and let yourself fall back onto the bed Eddie pulls a hand from behind his heat to pat yours. 

“We’ll figure something out,” he says quietly, while the others continue discussing what to do about both Henry and the Mind Flayer. “You should probably take a nap while you can.” 

“I just got up from a nap like two hours ago!” you whine, kicking your feet. “I feel like all I’ve been doing is sleeping. I need to think while I’m awake. Shit gets weird when I’m asleep.”

There’s a beat of silence before Eddie turns his head to look at you with a brow raised.

“How weird are we talkin’ about?”

You groan again. “Being sucked into a weird not-dimension by someone else levels of weird.” When you turn your head to look at Eddie, you almost flinch at how close your faces are. You keep your eyes on his nose; nice, safe, doesn’t give any kind of weird impression. Right? Right. 

“That’s how you talked to their friend? Eleven?” he asks, quietly, and the breathiness of his voice makes you swallow thickly. You nod twice and clear your throat, turning your head back to look up at the ceiling of the RV.

“Y-yeah. Um, yeah she, uh, she said it was In Between. Whatever that means.” 

“Sounds more like dreamwalking to me.”

“You’re not wrong. Would be nice to know who was doing the walking though. Me or her?” 

Eddie shrugs, and somehow, without your realizing, he’s wormed an arm under your head and pulls you in. He’s extremely nonchalant about it, which you wish you could be. You try to lift yourself up on your elbows again, but he makes sure you can move, and in fact holds your head fast against his shoulder. 

“Sleep,” he said, an edge in his voice even though it’s nearly a whisper. “We’re going out of down to buy guns and traps. You need your rest.” 

With the rumbling of the RV, the constant bump and jostle of it, and the presence of someone warm next to you, you find that your eyes are starting to feel a bit dry and heavy. 

“Fuck you,” you grumble, but close your eyes and clasp your hands over your stomach anyways. 

“Sucks to sucks,” Eddie chuckles, and the last thing you register before falling into a light slumber is the feeling of fingers raking through your hair. 

You wake up to the sound of the RV door slamming open and Eddie jumping out of his skin next to you. Nothing much happened—Erica making a quip to her brother, Steve shouting, everyone on edge and holding on to the nearest stationary object while Steve puts the RV in drive and bolts out of… 

“Wha—where are we? What hap-happened?” you mutter, sitting up on the bed, noticing that you’d been scooted up to lie down on it proper rather than just half-laid at the foot of it. “Did you move me while I was asleep?”

“We saw Hawkins’ star basketball team,” Robin says quickly, moving past you on the bed and kneeling by the window to peek out. “They didn’t seem super stoked to see us and honestly seeing a bunch of white boy jocks out for blood in a military surplus store doesn’t give me good vibes.” 

“Military surplus?” You ask, sleep still fogging your brain as you rub at your eyes. “That’s where we are—were?” 

“Yeah, Dustin and I stayed in here while they shopped around,” Eddie explains shortly, and there’s a tightness in his voice you don’t like. He’s sat with his back against the wall, Robin fit snugly between the two of you before she climbs back off the bed. “Did you grab anything good?”

“Oh,” Robin starts, turning around to face you two with a grin that feels just a little bit unhinged. “We grabbed something good. Nancy found a shotgun and, get this.” She leans in, and if you weren’t in a literal ride-or-die situation with this girl, you’d be a little worried about the teeth showing in her grin. “She’s gonna saw the thing off herself. Nancy Wheeler, illegally modifying a firearm. Amazing.”

“Amazing,” you mutter back, scooting yourself up on the bed to put your back against the wall, and leaning over to let your head fall on Eddie’s shoulder. “You were right. I needed a nap. I think I need a few more naps, actually.” 

“You can probably keep napping until we get there,” he says quietly. And again, there’s a warm arm around your shoulders that keeps you fixed to his side. You don’t even notice when your eyes drift shut again. 

“Where… when we get where?” 

“Don’t worry about it, sweetheart. Just sleep.” 

Sweetheart? That’s a new one. You wish you could analyze the speed of your thrumming heart and the wings of the butterflies in your stomach, but again, you’re unconscious before you can make too much of it.

You’re sitting on the steps to the RV while Robin and Steve prepare, of all things, Molotov cocktails. Dustin and Eddie are off in the field to your left hammering nails into trashcan lids, and though you’re exceptionally doubtful of their efficiency—”Aren’t the nails just gonna pop right out the second something hits them? What’s gonna keep them from just popping out?”—they seem pretty content doing that. Max is holding onto the previously mentioned shotgun while Nancy is, indeed, sawing off the barrel as short as is probably safe to do.

You’re not doing anything at all. Rest, they said, you burnt yourself out for hours teleporting both yourself and Nancy out of the Upside Down, they insisted. Not that there’s much for you to do. Even looking off to your right at the Sinclairs, and to what even you can tell is a shit wrapping job from Lucas, you wonder what you place is here, right now. 

You take a particularly long drag from the one cigarette you were able to convince Robin to let you have. You’d agreed, if only verbally, not to get involved with any of the fighting. And that had been after you’d tried to argue with both Eddie and Dustin that acting as a decoy was a stupid idea. Stupid, dangerous, reckless, pick a descriptor. 

Roughhousing catches your eye, and you hear Dustin shriek about wedgies. You take another drag and hop off the steps. 

“Where’re you going?” Steve pipes up, making Robin turn around almost owlishly to be able to see you. 

“Something on my mind,” you say vaguely, waving Eddie down when he eventually looks at you. “DnD nerd shit I gotta run by him.”

“Ugh, have fun,” Steve says with a shudder, turning his focus back on the bottles in front of him and waving at Robin to pay attention. 

“I’ve got a bad feeling about this, Ed,” you say, once you’ve got him to follow you to the other side of the trailer. You keep walking a bit, though it’s more of a nervous pacing. “There’s no way this is going to be an ambush.” 

“You’re thinking about it too much man,” Eddie replies easily, hands in his pockets and slightly out of breath. “It’ll be fine.There’s no way he’ll see us coming.” 

“That’s the thing,” you say, a bit too loudly, rounding on him. You look around quickly before walking up to him and leaning over, clearing your throat and quieting your voice. “Did they tell you what happened with the mind flayer before? Two year ago?” 

Eddie frowns and shakes his head. “They mentioned something about one of their friends being like, possessed or something, but they didn’t really… explain anything.”

“Right, Will was possessed,” you reiterate, grabbing at Eddie’s upper arm. “By the mind flayer. Whatever Will could see and whatever Will knew, the mind flayer knew, too. That’s how—” You cut yourself off before you can mention Billy. Not my story to tell, you think bitterly. “That’s how all of them almost got caught. Will was leading the demodogs right to them. If El hadn’t come back in time they would’ve been screwed.” 

Eddie doesn’t speak, looks off in the distance. Slowly, he reached up to grab the hand at his upper arm to pry it off, but doesn’t let it go. 

“What are you trying to say?” 

“Max is cursed, Ed,” you whisper, balling your hand into a fist in his. “She’s cursed, and just last night he took a joy ride in Nancy’s head. I’m pretty sure he’s well out of mine, but can we really be sure that there isn’t some kind of—a fragment of him, in either of them?” 

You can see Eddie twisting his tongue in his mouth, clenching his jaw. It’s a possibility that makes for a very grim reality; one where nothing you do matters because there isn’t a way for you to keep anything secret. There’s no way anyone is going to want to exclude Nancy from what’s going on. Nancy wouldn’t want to be excluded, if the ferocious expression she had earlier was anything to go by. 

And Max…

When Eddie turns back to look at you, there’s something a little wild in his eyes. Different from last time. He looks… not feral, like this, with his hair all out of sorts and his knuckles bloodied and bruised. No, he just looks dangerous. You bite the inside of your cheek when you realize that maybe this is what everyone in Hawkins was seeing all along. Ridiculous to be scared of this Eddie; everything about him right now is about protecting people. 

Not an ounce of malice. 

“You got a backup plan then?” 

You take a deep breath and shake your head. “I haven’t been able to come up with something that makes sense, yet, no.” 

Eddie lets out a breath that’s almost a sigh and finally lets go of your hand. He lets himself fall down onto the grass to sit, cross legged, and gestures at the ground next to him for you to follow. You sit directly in front of him, hands on your knees, drumming your fingers on them. 

“What do we have so far?” Eddie asks. 

“We’re working under the assumption that Henry’s a lich,” you start, looking down at your hands to count on your fingers. “We know he’s a psychic kid, like Eleven. Nancy mentioned that he said something about keeping everyone he kills up in his head. Is power absorption even a thing?” 

“In ADnD? Sure,” Eddie answers, leaning back on his hands and looking up at the clouds. “There’s ways to take someone else’s abilities, so I guess it’s not impossible for him to have yanked the other kids’ abilities from them.”

You stay quiet for a moment. Max had also mentioned that Henry’s, his… whatever weird mind palace he has going on had the bodies of the three teens he’d killed all strung up. You can’t help but wonder if maybe the other people he’s killed are somewhere in that psychic sanctuary, too. You shake the thought out of your head and continue. 

“Right, okay. So he’s yanked abilities from kids before. He’s psychic, and somehow being shoved into the Upside Down turned him into a lich.”

“Or being in there long enough turned him into one.”

“Shit,” you mutter, bringing a hand to your mouth and frowning. “No, you’re right. Steve was choking on something when we got to your trailer in the Upside Down and I remember dreaming about them being in the tunnels. And Will…” You growl and wave your hand in front of you. “Doesn’t matter, point is that he’s acting like a lich so we should probably treat him like one. I’m still worried about the phylactery.” 

“When you were with Nancy, in there,” Eddie starts slowly, and he has the impression of someone who’s trying to describe a picture while he’s still putting the puzzle together. “When Vecna got in her head, you like, froze when you touched her. Did you, y’know?” He motions vaguely at his eyes and you snap your fingers at him. 

“Yeah, yeah! I did! I saw some of that!” you exclaim, slapping your knee excitedly. “Okay, okay wait. So I saw the house, and saw the spiders. Fucking hate the spiders,” you mutter under your breath, screwing your eyes shut and trying to recall more. “There’s… this weird shrine in the attic, for the spiders. There’s something—I know there’s something else there besides the jars but I can’t—it’s too, I don’t know. It was too out of focus, I can’t remember what it was.” 

You let the end of your sentence trail off and start tracing patterns in the grass. “If he has a phylactery, and I’m pretty sure he does because everything else is Dungeons and Dragons related, I’m pretty sure it’s got something to do with that shrine.” 

Eddie nods and frowns. “He goes up there when he hunts people, right? It would make sense if he kept it close to him there.”

“But here,” you say, putting your hand out in front of you and pointing at the back of your hand. “Or there?” You flip your hand over and point at the palm. 

Eddie looks enthralled until something seems to click in his brain. He leans back from where he had, at some point, gotten very invested in the conversation and leaned into you. You lean back, in turn, frowning at him. He shakes a pointed finger at you at squints. 

“You’re going somewhere with this and I don’t like it.”

“Yeah well I don’t like the idea of you attracting a swarm of bats with fucking Metallica but here we are, aren’t we.” You slap his hand away and lean back in. “Look, if you can find a way to get me that disgusting ‘double the caffeine’ soda, like as many as you can.” 

“I’m pretty sure dying of a caffeine-induced heart attack is the opposite of helpful, y’know.” 

You can’t help the bark of laughter that escapes you. “No! God, no, look. Doing the plane shifting shit is draining, right?” He nods. “Right. So I just figure—”

“No, nuh uh, that’s a shit idea,” Eddie cuts you off, crossing his arms. “There’s a reason you pass out when you do it too much. Your body can’t handle it.” 

“When I’m starved, sleep deprived and freaked out of my mind, sure!” You exclaim, throwing your hands up. You clear your throat before lowering your voice again. “Look, it’s a—not a theory, fuck, uh. It’s a hypothesis, okay? We don’t have time to test it, I just have to trust that it’s gonna work.” 

“And what exactly is your backup plan?” 

“While you’re distracting the bats with Dustin and not getting yourselves killed,” you start, placing your hands back on your knees. “And while the other bozos are busy trying to blast Vecna back to whatever hellscape he crawled out of, I go looking for the spider shrine here and torch it.” You pause, and hold your hand up when Eddie opens his mouth to speak. “And if it’s not here, I’ll just plane shift and get it in the Upside Down.” 

“M’hm, cool, there’s a problem with that though,” Eddie says, and flaps his hands at you to quiet down before he continues. “No, shush. Vecna’s gonna be in that attic when you go there. And then there’s Max.”

‘Let’s use me as bait’ Max. ‘It won’t matter if it goes wrong if it’s me’ Max. You swear under your breath and bite down on your lip. Vecna being in the same room you don’t really care about; provided that Sanctuary actually worked, there’s not much he can do to you. 

Once he’s in Max’s head though, you can’t control that.

“Not on my own,” you whisper, and when Eddie asks you to repeat yourself, you feel your face splitting with a grin. “I can’t do it on my own, I mean—look, no one’s gonna be able to convince Max not to be the bait. She’s cursed, that’s how it is, and we don’t know whether or not Vecna’s looking through her head. But once he’s in there,” you pause, standing up and starting to pace. “Once he’s hunting her, she said something about hiding in her own head, right? Like, in a happy memory or something. I’m gonna be honest with you, I don’t think that’s going to work.” 

“And you have the face of someone who somehow managed to come up with an even worse idea,” Eddie says, slowly pushing himself to stand up on his feet. 

“Right, okay, first of all, fuck you,” you spit, crossing your arms as you pace. “Okay, so scrap the idea of looking for the phylactery. For now. Eleven knows what’s going on, and I already ended up in that weird In Between place with her, right? So once Vecna starts hunting her I can just—”

Both you and your thoughts are interrupted when Eddie stalks over and grabs you by the shoulders. 

“Hey, stop for a second,” he says, quietly, to a point where it’s got you a bit concerned. “Look, I get—I don’t understand what it’s been like for you for the past three years, okay? But you have to stop for a second.” One hand goes to grab one of your wrists to pull your hand up into view. You frown at Eddie and look at your hand when he nods at it. 

You’re shaking like a leaf. 

“You’re trying to throw yourself at way too many problems.”

“I can’t do nothing—”

“And I’m not telling you to do nothing,” Eddie says, letting your hand fall in favour of cupping your jaw with both hands. “I’m telling you to use that giant brain of yours wisely. You don’t need to go looking for soulbound artifacts or fighting psychic wars,” he continues, a thumb coming up to rub at your cheek.

“What else am I supposed to do, Ed?” You whisper, bringing your hands up to grab at his forearms. His hands don’t move. “I-I’ve been having these nightmares for years, and all of a sudden I can��I can do all these things, and I just, I have to do something.” 

“And you can,” Eddie reassures you, and when he rests his forehead against yours, you can just barely feel his breath fanning over your cheeks. “Just, just stick with m—us, just stick with us.”

“And what, bail you out?” you huff, and Eddie snorts. 

“Yeah, yeah just be our getaway driver. Best one out there. You ever heard of a getaway driver that can dimension hop?”

You laugh quietly and shake your head. You don’t risk opening your eyes yet. 

“Yeah, no, not so much.” You breathe, clear your throat and lean your head back away from Eddie, “Okay. Yeah, I’ll stay with you and Dustin. Second anything goes south I’m getting us all out of there.” 

“Sounds good to me.” You get a finger pat on the cheek before you put a finger up. 

“I’m still gonna need that gross soda if I’m gonna survive shifting like, three people though.”

𝓣𝓪𝓰𝓵𝓲𝓼𝓽

@storiesbyrhi @anothermunsonsimp @alovesongshewrote @doratheignora

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