#and maybe Dick

[vxidd]

another day at the fuck my gay life factory, at least tomorrow is friday for me and then I’m off the next 2 days

i feel very stuck in my life right now but I’m going to try and shift my focus and energy to stuff that matters and makes me happy, at the end of the day that’s all I can really do

[fallen-jpg]

it's december so time to stare at my art output for the year!!!

picked out some stuff that i'm ok with. wish i had more art to show but im trying to let it go since i was gone for 4 months this year. here's hoping for more drawing time next year

[prlssprfctn]

I know the fandom mostly agrees that Jason is that one always unemployed sibling in the family, but let me offer you a slightly enhanced concept - unemployed sibling Jason, who is the busiest sibling in the family.

No one can get hold of him. Like, ever. And it is not like he is lying, he is genuinely always has something else to do! Something random and unexpected, and, honestly, all his family can think is: what the hell?

Bruce, frowning: Remind me again, why the dinner in the circle of the family today doesn't suit your... schedule?

Jason, shrugging: I have a book club evening in the nursing home. We are discussing Margaret Atwood's Penelopiad tonight. Can't miss it. Also, Jennet-

Alfred, confused: Who is Jennet?

Jason: One of the old ladies in the nursing home, duh... Anyway, yeah, Jennet is having a birthday. She would be hella mad if her favourite grandson missed it, you know?

Bruce: ...Jason, you are not her-

Jason: (leaves)

Dick: Hey, wanna join me for tomorrow morning's training?

Jason, sighs: Sounds nice, but I have classes tomorrow.

Dick, confused: Classes? Since when you are enrolled in college?

Jason: Oh, no. I am a substitute teacher in one of the school's around.

Dick: WHAT-

Damian, calling Jason in the middle of the day: Can you pick me up from school? Others are busy, there is an emergency in the town.

Jason: Damn, sorry, kid, but I am not in the country right now. By the way, do you want to talk with your mother?

Damian: ...What that supposed to mean? Where are you?

Jason: I was planning to visit All-Caste, but first decided to meet up with Talia. I am kinda in Egypt right now, anyway.

Damian: ...

Tim, already used to Jason's constant busy status, sighing: I bet you won't agree if I call you on the lunch tomorrow?

Jason: Uh, no. I have plans. But if you tag along with me, we can get lunch together later.

Tim, surprised: ...Okay. What do you have tomorrow? Knitting club? A shift in library?

Jason: Nah, graduation ceremony.

Tim: Right, you are a substitute teacher.

Jason: No, no. My graduation ceremony. I am getting my PHD in literature.

Tim: SINCE FUCKING WHEN-

[frownyalfred]

a nosy socialite at an event, leaning down: “Oh Richard, it must be so hard for you in that house, what with Bruce’s…proclivities for nighttime guests.”

Dick Grayson, fully aware at age 13 that Bruce Wayne is a Loser™ whose only “nighttime guest” is Clark Kent, who comes over to “review cases” with Bruce before/after patrol while both of them awkwardly ignore any and all tension between them: “Something like that.”

[sparkoflena]

Kon: Why are you staring at me so intently?

Tim, completely casually: I think I want to stab you with Kryptonite a few times. In different areas. For science.

Kon: ...why is my best friend considering torturing me?

Tim: I'm wondering if it takes you down so badly because it is truly that dangerous to you or if the invulnerablility of Kryptonians gives you a weak pain tolerance.

Kon: And you're asking me, a half human, instead of Clark or Kara?

Tim: They'd start telling Bruce about my "concerning villainous behavior" again.

Kon: And I won't?

Tim: I've kept fighting through pneumonia, a gunshot wound, and broken bones. And you go down when I poke you with a rock. Come on, you've got to be curious.

Kon: ...okay, I am a little curious.

Tim: YES! You won't regret this!

Kon: I will absolutely regret this.

[mausolealdrift]

its baffling seeing people on here being all shocked about how other ppl didnt have sex or do drugs or drink or go to parties etc etc in high schools like. sorry i was too busy getting bullied to do all of that stuff i guess. why are you surprised that there’s losers on the cringe loser website

[skyrigel]

and then it's the hottest thing ever

[redsray]

i love the trope of Bruce's kids being yoinked by different parent figures in their lives, and the kids knowing full well and using it to their advantage when they've got any problems with him.

Tim, pissed at Bruce: That's it, I'm staying with Shiva for the week. Cass is now my official sister 2/3 of the way.

Cass, grinning: Baby brother.

Jason, annoyed with Bruce (more than usual): 'Kay I'm gonna go bunker up with Talia for a bit before I put a bullet through you. Cya.

Damian: Say hi to her for me.

Jason, with finger guns on the way out: Will do.

Dick, needing a break from Bruce (again): If anyone needs me I'll be in Kansas.

Tim, nodding: Understandable.

Steph: Kansas?

Dick: I need Uncle Clark therapy.

Duke: Alright I'm gonna go crash at Jeff's for a bit.

Cass: B?

Duke: ... A bit overbearing. I'll tell Anissa you said hi.

Cass, grinning: Good. Bring back Grace's cookies.

Duke, laughing: Got it.

[factual-flittermouse]

Bruce: Dick, what’s this I’m hearing about you trying to send Tim to Arkham?

Dick: For the last time, I NEVER said that!

Tim: As good as!

Bruce: *disappointed dad voice* Really chum, I can’t believe you would tell your brother such a thing.

Dick: I didn’t! I just suggested therapy!

Tim: *scoffs* Yeah, in METROPOLIS.

Bruce: *Gasps*

Jason: *Gasps*

Damian: *Betrayed*

Alfred: *Too proper to gasp so loudly, but almost fumbles his antique feather duster*

Dick: Oh come on, it’s not that bad! It’s close, it’s relatively safe, and their PHDs are less likely to go rogue.

Jason: *Cover’s Damian’s ears as he backs them both out of the room, still loudly gasping in offense like the theater kid he is at heart*

Bruce: I’m not mad, I’m just disappointed.

[seagiri]

qué novela es esa ma

[barkbarkyapyap]

Thinking about the bat family doing normal family shit and it’s just a painful reminder that they are still human people and humans are kinda silly.

Like

They go ice skating and Jason, 6ft and 225 pound, the Red Hood, is comically bad at ice skating. One foot on the ice and he’s on his back with his feet in the air like a cartoon.

And he denies it the whole time but his legs shake and he clings to the wall with white knuckles while muttering curses like he’s trying to spell his feet to work.

And Dick is just great with all his balance and figure skating stupid fucking acrobat bastard-

Or they decide to go see a movie as a family. It’s a horror movie, and they assume everyone will be fine because they see enough horror in their daily life.

And normally they would be, but this is a slasher. So it’s all suspense and jumpscares and gore. And Tim, Tim who loves psychological thrillers and can see movie endings coming from miles away, is suddenly clinging to Dick’s arm as subtly as possible because every scare has him tensing and trying not to yelp.

Or they go out to a carnival, with rollercoasters and bad food and worse games to win dumb prizes. They’re walking around, splitting up to do various activities, and Dick and Damian comes up to Bruce and asks him to go home.

Why? Because Dick drank too much soda, he refuses to use the bathrooms. He has an irrational fear of outhouses. And Damian saw one of the mascots walking around, a man in some kind of shitty lion suit with a vest, and is convinced the lion suited man is going to get him. (Bruce does take them home, but Jason teases them the whole way.)

Just silly things that show how they are people beneath the masks.

Love it.

[arkangelo-7]

I need Battison to have a Robin.

I need him to carry around a little bundle of joy in his arms. I need him to risk his life saving him from the movie’s big bad. I need him to hold his tiny hands or cradle his tiny face. I need him to crack the smallest of smiles when Robin makes a pun.

I need him to walk into the penthouse, tired and angry and sad, and see his little Robin sprawled across the floor, giggling as his crayons draw him and Alfie and B—their little family.

I him to crawl out of the darkness with Robin. His Robin.

[pru-dle]

Gonna do the other robins but also Tim stumped me so bad now his portrait is extremely more detailed than I wanted it to be AHAHQHSHQC

[oh23]

At a stereotypical hero introduction (imagine them like power rangers or anime girls stance idfk)

damian: Im robin

tim: i’m red robin

dick: im the original robin

jason: i. Im dead robin? everyone else just staring at him distraught falling to their knees saying Nooo jason u need to stop doing thattt

[frownyalfred]

"Bruce trains so he can always pick up his kids" nah. Bruce trains so that he can throw his kids. sending a 225 lb missile of muscle at his enemies is much more useful than being able to cuddle them, send tweet

[abisalli]

A long overdue ko-fi for the dear @darlinglissa !! Thank you for being so very patient with me <3 You get: Tim being an annoying little brother to Dick (because I've been reading a lot of 90s/early 2000s comics lately)