#and make them tragic because they are just that. human

[lara-prism-light]

Well, that's a description!😂

The nerd(Alphiys) is antagonized by the fandom because she experimented on other monsters to increase their lifespan, but this resulted in them melting into each other.

She feels a lot of guilt about this and even almost killed herself (or at least that is implied) until she meets Undyne, with whom they become close and eventually at the end of the game you have to bring the two together as a sapphic couple.

At the end of the game she decides to tell the truth to the families and they can now live with the relatives who were experimented on, even though they are melted into each other.

Yeah that's a fucked up story line but in the end she's not a bad person, just a flawed person who made mistakes. She's not so much a nerd as she is an otaku, an anime fan.

Also the "stripper robot" she made is Mettaton and he's not a stripper, he's a TV star for the entire underground. He has a trans story making him a trans icon in the fandom. He was a ghost who couldn't find the "right/perfect cup" until he met Alphiys and she made his body, making him corporeal (it's a whole lore of ghosts in Undertale)

The "Milf", also known as the goat mom (Toriel), was the queen of the underground and had a son with the king.

In short, something tragic happened to her son and the king proclaimed a new law that to leave the underground they would have to take seven human souls, and therefore every human who fell would have their souls taken for him.

This is not something he likes but it is for the good of his people, Toriel did not agree with this and fled to the Ruins (the first area of the game) where she took care of it, but every time a human fell(it is heavily implied that they might have been children), she would try to keep them safe and in the Ruins, but one by one they either died or managed to get out and met their end and their souls were taken for the king. That is until the game's protagonist arrives.

People in the fandom antagonize her for abandoning her husband and her kingdom, trying to force the protagonist to stay in the Ruins forever, and simply letting the humans leave to their end. Honestly both she and the king have their flaws in everything that happens in the game, they are neither right or wrong in their actions and clearly do what they do out of guilt and grief.

That was my best explanation of what this post is about.

I love women

[would-this-pokemon-be-a-friend]

the Chandelure line?

It is unfortunately time for another heartbreak: litwick, the first in the chandelier evolution line, would make a frankly terrible pet. I know, I know: look at that face! How cute! How unassuming! You are going to have to trust me on this: if you even come across a wild litwick, make sure to keep your distance.

But before we get into the doom and gloom, some positive points. Litwicks are the perfect size to be a pet at just a foot tall and six-and-a-half pounds. The pokédex doesn’t give us any indication that litwicks need a specific environment to thrive, which is another huge plus. They also don’t appear to be particularly aggressive, which is good thing, because this species’ suite of moves are quite threatening. I don’t usually say this, but do me a favor and look at the images for the move Overheat on Bulbapedia. I think it kinda speaks for itself.

The problems, tragically, don’t end with all the ways a litwick could harm you with their Ghost- and Fire-Type moves. See, that gentle light that every healthy litwick generates needs fuel of a particularly grim type: human life force (Black). While litwicks are outwardly quite friendly, seeming to act as guides, all the while absorbing the life energy of anyone who comes near them (White, Y). Litwicks are particularly drawn to taking the life energy of children, whose life force seems to be a particularly powerful fuel for them (Sword, Shield). In children, at least, this behavior appears to be lethal: the pokédex envelopes this fact in a tasteful euphemism, stating that they guide the children “to the spirit world” (Sword). So, bottom line, it simply isn’t safe to live with a litwick. Like many Ghost-Type pokémon, litwicks thrive off of the absorption of human life energy, making them quite a hazardous creature to have around, even with proper training. There isn’t much evidence whether litwicks can even control this absorption, meaning a very well-trained and well-intentioned litwick could still easily take your life by complete accident.

It gives me no joy to hit Ghost-Types with “: (“ rankings, since they are my favorite pokémon type, but here we are. I really wouldn’t recommend it.

[veal-exe]

!! SPOILERS FOR K-POP: DEMON HUNTERS BELOW !!

The biggest reason I rated K-Pop: Demon Hunters a 5 out of 10 (and honestly, the longer I sit with it, the more it feels closer to a 4) is because the ending genuinely ruined it for me. And not just in a “this didn’t work for me personally” way, like, it fundamentally undoes the entire thematic core of the movie. It was a mean ending. A cruel ending. A narrative choice that directly contradicted what the rest of the film seemed to be building toward and trying to say.

Now, to be clear, I don’t inherently think a mean or tragic ending is bad. I love complicated, painful conclusions when they’re earned. I’ve sobbed my way through films that ended on heartbreak and still called them some of the best of the best. But if you’re going to tell a cruel story, you have to build a narrative that supports that conclusion (unless the point is that sometimes life doesn't support the conclusion, like, 'My Sister's Keeper' is a bad book but it is a great example of that, and this movie is not that). That prepares the viewer for the message you’re trying to deliver. And more importantly, you need to make sure your ending aligns with the point your story is trying to make.

That’s the core issue here. K-Pop: Demon Hunters spent most of its runtime hammering in the idea that people are more than their worst mistakes. That guilt and shame don’t define who you are. That even when you fall, it’s possible to get back up again and be seen, fully, truly seen, and still be accepted. That forgiveness is possible, and salvation is a choice available to everyone. It wasn’t subtle about that either; the metaphors weren’t buried. It’s a story about demons as guilt and shame, about the pain of imperfection, about self-destruction born of trying too hard to be what the world wants you to be.

And then the ending shows us the Saja Boys, former idols who’ve been corrupted, yes, but whose corruption is explicitly linked to the pain and guilt they’ve internalized. We’re shown that Jinu, at least, is not just a mindless monster but a person who is suffering under the weight of his regrets, manipulated by the demon. We’re shown that there’s still something human in him. And from that, we can reasonably infer that the rest of the Saja Boys may be in similar positions, trapped, not gone.

So how does the film end?

They kill them. That’s it. No mercy. No conversation. No effort to save them. Just execution.

And it’s not even treated as a tragic necessity. It’s triumphant. It’s cathartic. It’s a moment of victory. It's played as Funny.

For a film that spent so much time saying you are more than your shame, you are not the sum of your mistakes, you can be redeemed, that ending was a slap in the face. Because what it ultimately says is: Actually, no. Some people really are just too far gone. Some people deserve to die because of mistakes they've made. Some mistakes aren’t forgivable, and some people aren’t worth saving.

Which, okay, if that’s the message you want your story to carry, fine. I don't even have issue with that, in fact, that ending would align more with my personal worldview, but this isn't about my personal worldview, it's about narrative analysis, because that’s not the story this movie was telling. This movie wanted to be about grace and compassion and the pain of trying to be perfect in a system that will chew you up no matter what. It wanted to be about fighting for your own humanity. But the ending was about vengeance, about purity, about punishment. About drawing a line and deciding who gets to be considered human and who doesn’t.

And I just don’t think you get to have it both ways.

There’s also a whole other conversation to be had about how deeply ableist some of those implications are, especially with the way the Saja Boys’ corruption is treated as a kind of moral contagion, as if suffering and being used up by the industry makes you inherently monstrous. But that’s its own post.

All I’ll say here is this: I wanted to love this film. I was ready to love it. It had so many of the ingredients I look for in a fun family film, and I am deeply weak for any kind of musical. And for a while, it really looked like it was going to land it. But you can’t build a story on the foundation of redemption and then end it by saying some people don’t get to be redeemed (even if they change!).

It doesn’t work.

[ryanwinsatlife]

An eldrich being of unprecedented power cannot be cute. Tim refuses.

No matter how his mostly-human face lights up (literally and figuratively) while talking about the stars. It's clear that he really, truly loves them.

(well, at least Tim's date idea was a good one. Tim: 1, Phantom: 673

...

he's fucked, isn't he.)

—–—–—–—

Danny is showing Red Robin the bird constalations, along with the names of their stars and their stories.

"Sorry there's no Robins up here, birdy." He jokes, "but you could be an honorary Corvus, if you like."

Red Robin nods seriously. "I had no idea you had an encyclopedic knowlage of the stars, Phantom."

"Comes with being Ancient of Space," Danny smiles. "I know every star that has ever or will ever exist."

The vigilante takes a split second to... blanch, maybe? before that impressive mask is back up again.

"Ancient...?"

Oh! Right! 'Ancient of Space' makes him sound, well. Ancient. He can't make Red Robin think he's some kind of predator!

"It's just a title," he says, "doesn't have anything to do with my age– I'm actually the youngest Ancient to ever be... well, 'crowned' is the wrong word, but you get it."

—–—–—–—

Tim does not, in fact, 'get it.'

"I understand," he replies instead, because he's not going to let Phantom know that he has no idea what he's talking about. "When you say 'the youngest Ancient'..."

"Most of the others are spirits– embodiments of a concept that is– that have existed for as long as their root has." Phantom adds 'helpfully,' "Clockwork, for example, is the Ancient of Time. I'm a... well, not really a 'normal' ghost, but I'm definitely not a spirit."

Tim has never been so glad to have an eidetic memory before in his life.

"What do you mean, 'not a normal ghost'? You seem normal enough to me, for an eldritch King of another dimension."

Phantom seems to... expand. Unfold might be a better description. Between one blink and the next, Phantom becomes something Other. Something that makes the hair on the back of Tim's neck stand up and all of his senses scream DANGER. A shiver runs down Tim's spine like cold fingers trying to drag him through the floor and into the cold embrace of certain death.

Just as quickly as it happened, it was gone. Phantom was standing in front of him exactly as always, even though this form now seems harmless in comparison to... That.

"Sorry birdie," Phantom's smile is cold, "but you have a long way to go before you get to learn my tragic backstory."

Ah, shit.

Wip Wednesday?

Phantom floated lazily in a half-circle above them, legs crossed midair, arms tucked behind his head, that too-wide grin stretched across his face like a mask stitched on with mirth and menace.

“Let’s make a deal, Birdy.”

He spun slowly in place, green eyes glowing like dying stars.

“One date for every pitt I take out. I’ll start with the first one as a sign of grace.”

Somewhere in the mountains of Nanda Parbat, a pool began to bubble. Tim didn’t see it, but he felt it. The room chilled. Something ancient cracked apart. The scanners in Barbara computer rang in alarm.

The pit evaporated.

Not drained. Not destroyed. Undone.

Tim’s throat clicked as he swallowed.

Phantom pointed a glowing finger. “That one’s on me. Next ones are on you. Just say when.”

The second pit started to boil.

Jason surged forward, a hand out. “Stop—”

Phantom’s eyes didn’t leave Tim's.

Tim's eyes never left Phantom's

A third pit broke into steam and green fire.

The fourth trembled before erupting, sending up a column of ghostlight and screams. Somewhere distant, Ra’s al Ghul howled.

Phantom’s grin only widened.

Tim exhaled slowly, like it was the only thing keeping him grounded. His fingers curled into the chair arms.

Phantom floated closer. “Those were the ones you knew about.” His voice dropped into something deeper, more ancient. “Want me to handle the ones you didn’t?”

Tim’s mouth was dry. “How many?”

Phantom hovered until they were nose to nose. His voice was velvet, soft as snowfall:

“A lot.”

And then he leaned back again with a chuckle, twirling mid-air. “But don’t worry—I’ll only show you the ones I’m destroying. You just tell me when to stop.”

Tim stared at him, jaw tense. He could feel Barbara's eyes flick between them like a tennis match of insanity. Jason's fists clenched at his sides.

Tim breathed in deep, exhaled once. “...Keep going.”

Screens flickered to life on their own. Oracle’s setup surged with static and data feeds—grainy, spectral images of Lazarus Pits failing, collapsing, boiling away into nothing. Groups of twenty. Then forty. Then eighty.

The room filled with the low thrumming of eldritch static and the faraway screams of something ancient dying.

By the time number (xxx) imploded in a burst of unnatural light, Tim raised a shaking hand.

“Stop.”

Phantom halted mid-spin, upside down, and beamed. “Pleasure doing business with you, Birdy.”

[molloyism]

one thing is about me is im gonna be such a sucker for mortal au’s

[m0thlegs]

rereading the luxury liner arc after I just got back into my hyperfix recently and I wanna make sure I have a fresh understanding of the characters and. Guys I’m slowly being convinced of dadbastian now. I’m a changed woman

[we-stan-the-stans-27]

Congratulations, you've awoken my Percy Jackson Hyperfixation from its deep ass slumber all so I can contribute to this beautiful and breathtakingly tragic AU.

Okay, so Ford is sent on a magic quest! Wonderful! The Oracle has chosen him to save the world! Right?

Except just stepping outside of Camp Half Blood is basically a death sentence (it's a miracle Stanley survived on his own at all, tbh) and Ford, Fiddleford, and Emma-May are 10000% going to run into monsters, trickster gods (probably) and some of my very favorite aspects of the Percy Jackson series'.

Ford and Stanley are supposed to be apart for thirty years, so I'm thinking Ford goes through something similar to the Odyssey (a comparison I love making with these two fucking idiots, but anyway-).

BASICALLY, Ford gets trapped inside the Lotus Hotel and Casino, in Las Vegas.

I mean. Come on. It's kinda perfect. Ford runs off on this big adventure, following clues and seeking refuge when necessary (this guy has no streets smarts and maybe at this point Fiddleford had been kinda been driven insane by their last monster fight. God only knows what happened to Emma) so. There isn't anyone who could see through such an obvious trap to get Ford out of there.

PAUSE-

Now, pausing Ford in his thirty's, trapped in the Lotus Hotel, with no memory of why he's supposed to be escaping (part of what makes it such a good trap, tbh) and we come back to how Stanley realizes he has a quest of his own.

Saving his dumb ass brother.

Filbrick has another kid, after his fling with a god. Both twins weren't worth the trouble (hence why they got shipped off to camp asap) and he started over with Caryn (a nice, lying, but normal mortal women.) She probably even acts as a nice enough step mother the maybe two times she saw or visited with Stan and Ford.

Not what I'm getting at. The point is, Schermie exists, he's human, but he's also Stan and Ford's half brother through Filbrick. WHICH MEANS DIPPER AND MABEL EXIST EVERYONE. My whole point of this tangent is to establish them in this universe. So if you take nothing else from this long ass post of rambles, at least listen HERE BECAUSE I'M COOKING.

Schermie is often stereotyped as the 'boring' sibling. Taxes, wife, a kid, the loving grandpa who maybe has a beach house. Depending on if you headcannon him as the older brother (which you could still do here and Filbrick just becomes a dirty cheater who cheats on his wife. I'm down~) He is also the perfect age to have served in the Vietnam war. He's got his own trauma which perfectly explains his own life and why he enjoys a quite cup of tea on the back porch listening to wind chimes and watching humming birds.

He settles down with a very nice women and they have their daughter. Who is also pretty normal. Good parents- they never divorce, or fight even if Schermie no doubt still suffers from PTSD and has his own issues -and that women is Dipper and Mabel's mom. She falls for her very own god, Ares, and gives birth to the other two protagonists. :)

It's so hard to pick a godly parent that matches both Dipper and Mabel at the same time. Not knowing which parent is connected to Stan and Ford genetically actually makes it more difficult to choose. Ultimately, I decided that the most obvious choice is the worst possible one.

Dipper and Mabel are both pretty disconnected from their parents, from what we see in the show. They were on the verge of divorce and heavily relied on each other growing up, fighting their own battles and the likes.

But they aren't your typical Ares child since they often have a naturally bulkier build, more muscles, and a natural fighting instinct.

Instead, Mabel loves to craft and keep her hands busy (although you can't tell me she wouldn't stab someone with a knitting needle if it came down to it) with a bubbly personally that lacks the blood lust of her father.

And Dipper? He's an even bigger disappointment with how small and 'weak' he feels compared to other kids his age. (Much less their half siblings in the Ares cabins. They are easily the smallest inside once they get claimed.)

So. Why Ares? Maybe their mom saw her fathers rage from war (his PTSD episodes) and you know how people say women marry people like their fathers. Or even grandfather, depending on how you view Filbrick.

Perhaps its some of that Pines anger and stubbornness passing down through both sides of the family.

Ultimately I picked Ares because of what we see from both twins in the show. They may lack blood lust, but that doesn't mean they aren't good at fighting. It's literally in their blood. Episode after episode we watch them literally dodge death time and time again.

Running away often, sure, but any good solider knows when to retreat. XD Plus. They're kids. Barely teens. So cut them some slack. They'll get better (probably through boxing, and practice) with age.

UNPAUSE!

Back to what's up with Ford, kinda. We're coming back to that, through our brand new Demigod twins Dipper and Mabel.

They go to camp for the summer- eventually get claimed after the two of them team up as a bunch of badasses and defeat some monster despite being way too young to be doing that -and meet the rest of the cast.

Wendy, daughter of Demeter. (You can't tell me that her dad, the lumberjack, wouldn't of been able to hit it off with her. He's charming enough that they had all of Wendy's younger brothers too. Explains why her mom is never around. Kinda stuck in the underworld most of the year. XD )

Candy and Grenda, daughters of Aphrodite. (You just know Mabel is so jealous and is obsessed with their mom until she grows up and realizes she's a cunt just like all their godly parents)

Not Soos though, not yet. (we'll get back to him, my beloved son of Apollo. He's a sunshine happy go lucky character. That's so Soos and you can fight me on that.)

From there (eventually) they get their own quest, travel across the country to visit their great uncle Stanley to find out the fate of their other great uncle Ford and what became of him on his quest where he was ultimately swallowed by the Lotus Hotel with Fiddleford. (Fids definitely went insane after fighting a monster and that's how they ended up in the hotel because Ford needed a safe space to take care of his friend. To bad they stayed to long and forgot why they ever wanted to leave.....)

I don't know how exactly Dipper and Mabel and Stanley find out Ford's fate (but they go rescue him when they do) but you best believe they absolute bond over their shitty godly parents. :)

Dipper and Mabel are kinda 'runts' like Stanley just with a different God. They bond over that 10000% and Soos too. He was probably never claimed (BOOOOOO) But-

OH MY GOD. Soos gets a postcard from Apollo- claiming him -and giving them a hint about where to find Ford in LAS VEGAS!?!? The worms are cooking good tonight guys. :)

Also, I had this idea that Stanley, to keep himself safe, sort of founded his own little camp in Gravity Falls. Maybe because of all the magic its a natural safe haven for Demigods and magical creatures to be safe from Monsters. That would explain why he eventually landed there and never ever left. Why Soos settled there, maybe that's even where Wendy is from. I kinda wanted her to go on the trip with Mabel and Dipper because lets be real. Even if they're a little older, someone has to be the slightly older adult on their quest. XD

Alright, that's all my word vomits. If anyone wanted to know. :)

Random Question: In a Percy Jackson Au, with everyone being related to the gods, who would be Stan and Ford's parent? B/c I keep thinking either Athena(Ford smart) or Dionysius(madness).

Hmm. Hard to say, because they are twins so it'd need to be the same one, and they're mirrors of each other which makes choosing difficult. Hmm.

Dionysius would work better than Athena, but maybe Eris? The goddess of chaos? Fits their general behavior.

Ares might be interesting, Ford thinking it was wrong only for him losing his temper and showing off his own skills as a son of war (filbrick parallel there maybe?)

Hermes would work too, fitting Stan but making Ford feel alienated? Before he goes on his own 30 year parallel journey and sort of goes 'ah no this feels right actually'

Poseidon seems too on the nose, but i'm partial specifically because he's also the god of horses.

Thats what i've got off the top of my head! Hope this helps!

Waiit!!!! Additional thought!

Athena would absolutely work, because not only does she suit Ford for the obvious intellectual reasons, she suits Stan for also being the goddess of handcraft, and both for being a goddess of war. Fords the stereotypical son of Athena (not actually as wise as he appears lol), while Stan not so much, more creatively inclined.

Because not only would Filbrick still be their dad, maybe impressing her with his business savey? or something? and dumping his terrible parenting on the two kids he didn't really want, you could def add more angst with them showing up to camp, staying at the Hermes cabin, and only Ford getting claimed. They're twins, nearly identical, but Fords her son in all the ways the rest of her children are, exhibits traits similar to the rest of her children, and has six fingers. I'm not an expert, but my brief research into the subject shows that six fingers was seen as something to celebrate by greeks? Could be wrong, but Ford being bullied hard because of his hands with mortals, then getting praised for it when he gets to camp sure does sound like something that would boost his ego and twist his insecurity about it.

And then there's Stan. He's not a stereo typical son of Athena, more creative and loose than his siblings. Leans more towards those craft qualities and warlike, and him being Fords twin makes everyone stop and second guess their assumption that Athena must be their mother, because Stan's so different. Must be Eris or some other minor god or goddess. something that can get two such different kids.

Then Ford gets claimed, and Stan doesn't. Everyone knows Athena is his mom, they're twins, so her not claiming him is a deliberate choice. Another snub in Stan's face, being second best, the unwanted child. Fords moving out to the Athena cabin, and Stans hanging out with the Hermes kids. And he'll brush it off! Say he was just too much to handle, and really the Hermes kids are more his style! Everyone knows the Athena cabin is full of nerds after all! He'd hate it there!

(He'd love it. Surrounded by his siblings, all of them passionately explaining what they're doing to him, sitting there and getting to be a sound board or someone to bounce ideas off of is all he ever wanted to be with Ford. Sure he might not understand what they're doing and might get rowdy, but he's sure they'd have just as much fun as he and Ford did back home)

So while Fords shining as the six fingered newest addition to Athena's cabin, Stan's now the black sheep of camp. Why wouldn't his mom claim him? Whats wrong with him that the goddess wouldn't claim a child everyone knows is hers? Is he even? What if he's some kind of monster, some new beast there to get them while they're guards down.

The simple truth is that his parents are both terrible, and both prefer Ford. Even if Stan proved himself and got claimed later, there's no recovering his reputation, and his relationship with Ford's always going to have that hanging over them, along with the experience Ford got being by himself in the cabin, then feeling like Stan got dumped on him just as he was becoming his own person. Not seeing that Stan's smiling and joking around to hide the fact that no one likes or trusts him, and Fords the only person who talks to him at all.

Then maybe he does something, messes up something up for Ford that endangers the camp, and yeah its not so terrible they'll kick him out, the feeling of the one person who gave him the time of day turning his back on Stan is enough to be the same thing. Maybe Stan just disappears one day, and everyone mutters about how right they must have been not to trust him, not to include him, not to want to do anything with him. Maybe Fords sees it as Stan deciding he was better off alone, didn't want Stan to leave but thought he had all the time to be mad and talk about it later, but now Stan's gone, and no one knows where.

Whew. That got way more intense then i planned. Anyway thats my thoughts on it!

[shallowseeker]

this whole episode is cas thinking about what he himself is and the brutal "heartless" role he will undertake out of necessity to protect his loved ones

War is what Michael does, he says.

War is what my family does.

And when Dean says: "Well, then we do what we do"

what Dean means is stick together. Protect one another. Find another way.

BUT

Dean's family hunts

But Cas...

Cas's (angel) family wars.

And Cas wants to protect them FROM that, and with very, very good reason. (I mean.. .They're literally going to a world that is THE Heaven family on steroids. Even Ketch changes his tune about angels after seeing them fight for real.)

So, Cas...

During all this, Cas decides pretty much this: I AM A SOLDIER AND I WILL OUT-SOLDIER MY WHOLE STUPID WAR-MONGERING FAMILY TO KEEP MY HUMAN FAMILY SAFE

"I'm not Sam and Dean." I'm not human. (Goodbye, coat of humanity.)

Love and protectorship can be very

very

scary indeed...

//

"I'm an angel. I'll be the monster so you don't have to be."

also LOL sam forever taking cas's side and winning negative brownie points for it

script via @spnscripthunt-inactive

[chirpsythismorning]

This is a continuation in exploring why I think Mike's character regression over the seasons can be explained in part by guilt, which he has yet to confront

Original post

Now we're onto s2, which jumps us ahead in the timeline a bit.

Mike has been calling out to El on the walkie for approx. 252 days now, under what he views as the false hope she might actually be alive. This is mostly based on the fact that Mike thought he saw El outside of his house a few hours after she 'died' (he did see her, bc she was there...) and so a part of him does think there's a chance. And yet this is also isn't something Mike seems to be comfortable talking about the others with.

Which brings us to the crazy together scene. Although this scene has a lot going on, there's one aspect of it in particular that I want to focus on, as it's the driving force for what is going to be discussed, which is that Halloween night was also the last night Mike called El, aka day 353.

I just want to preface what follows, with the fact that I do not personally think Mike giving up calling El, as a concept on its own, means that he couldn't possibly love El romantically or something. It's not even about that idea from an audience perspective. And this is because any average person, in reality, mourning someones' death, should not be calling out to that person for almost a year. Letting go doesn't make you a bad person, whether it was romantic, platonic or even familial. It's called healing and accepting what is and trying to move on and live your life.

Neither does Mike giving up after that night make him heartless or a bad character in my opinion. It literally just makes him human. But that also doesn't mean that's how Mike feels about it, nor does it mean that the manifestation of this guilt isn't going to affect his behavior over the course of the series, causing some very unfortunate choices on Mike's part to then lead to some very unfortunate events for everyone...

Where it starts to get sort of complex is that I think the whole point of the crazy together scene and where it ended up was to for it to showcase how Mike and Will were both willing to accept each other, despite these secrets they've been keeping to themselves.

Will revealed the truth to Mike about how he could still see into the UD, with the addition of seeing this big 'shadow in the sky', followed by asking Mike to not tell the others because they wouldn't understand. Mike then responds by saying El would understand, followed by confiding his own secret to Will that he's been keeping from the others, which is that he thinks he's seen signs that El could still be alive.

The scene then ends with them in agreement that if they're both going crazy, they'll go crazy together, with it arguably being their most incriminatingly romantic moment to date, as it juxtaposes other uncannily similar romantic mentions on the show involving that same word.

But no matter what happens, they're promising to support each other, specifically the weird shit they have going on and could presumably continue to explore that weirdness, without telling anyone else who might judge them for it or misunderstand their feelings entirely...

This is why Mike had no problem with Will going crazy in s2 because as promised, he was going to be right there with him. Also meaning, Mike COULD have had no problem continuing to test out his theory that El was alive, because Will would have supported him.

Obviously, Will sort of had his hands tied in s2 (literally?), but the point still stands. It's not like this was something Mike HAD to give up, because that conversation between him and Will instilled that they would support each other and what makes them feel crazy.

I think the issue though, is that what's causing Mike so much grief daily for almost a year now, is the guilt that came with El's death and him feeling responsible. And so, in contrast to Will's slightly more justified assumptions that what he's seeing could actually be real based on what's happened to him, it's like Mike is asking himself whether he's actually seeing El because she's still alive OR is he just imagining she's still alive because he wants to forgive himself?

A kid deducing that in their head would make them feel pretty awful, don't you think? Maybe even lead them to calling out to that person for almost a year in hopes that they might still be alive?

Meaning Mike choosing that night to walk away, to give up, is likely a result of his conversation with Will making him feel more comfortable with finally letting go of some of that guilt in order to actually start the process of moving on. Because a big part of why he didn't want to move on was because of guilt in the first place.

Also confiding in Will and only Will, not the others, who were hell bent on interpreting all of Mike's feelings for El as romantic, was maybe Mike's way of avoiding the pressure to associate his whole relationship with El as strictly romantic. With Will, maybe Mike knew he wasn't going to spin it into something like that. And he would’ve been right, because Will didn't.

October 30th, Halloween Night (Day 353 - Last call)

You cannot tell me that day 353 isn't framed as the last call. Like Mike is literally walking away dramatically, leaving El alone, with her now just a tiny dot surrounded by darkness. The way it's framed leaves the viewer genuinely feeling heartbroken because there's some very evident finality to what is being presented. And we even see that El feels it too, hence the episode cutting off dramatically with her tear filled eyes.

And so why did Mike choose THIS moment to give up? Why did he choose now to put his 353 day streak to rest? Like, that was impressive as hell. He could have easily kept that going, but instead he decided that this was going to be the last time he was going to try calling out to her...

November 1st (Day 354)

El is still pretty bummed that Hopper came home late last night, but I'm guessing she's even more bummed still processing what might have very well been Mike finally giving up that night too.

Although I don't think El would blame Mike for giving up, still, she too throughout all of this had been building up hope herself. El's been clinging onto the bond she made with Mike, specifically the romantic moments, to the point where she has been watching shows with romantic themes, putting herself in the position of the love interest.

So him not giving up, to El, has been a signal that what they are feeling between each other is very deep and... romantic. Him keeping this going this long is a sign to her that these feelings are pretty much guaranteed. And if he doesn't continue, that hope would obviously dwindle.

At breakfast that morning, Hopper acknowledges the TV cord peaking out of El's room, which is the device she uses to visit Mike from the void, all the way from the cabin. Without it, she is not able to 'communicate' with him, let alone see if he actually didn't give up after that night she feared he did...

Unfortunately her and Hopper have an argument after this, leading to her storming off to her room. And after Hopper is gone, El finds herself being so impatient to see Mike after almost a year of waiting, that she decides to take fate into her own hands. She isn't willing to wait until the evening, which is roughly speaking the usual time Mike uses the walkie to call her every night. She needs to see him now.

And lucky(?) for her, she does!

Finally! A SIGN! After almost a year of no signs that El is alive, since the night she went missing, Mike is getting a sign El is alive!

And he runs after it! He goes to check to confirm his (valid) suspicions, only for her to not be there, with Mike looking disappointed, but also kind of like he's accepted it's a lost cause at this point.

Mike's hope that El is alive and okay and the relief that would come with finally letting go of this massive weight of guilt, is not within reach. He just needs to accept it and let it go. He needs to forgive himself and move on.

On top of all of this, Will is experiencing his own version of crazy. And Mike seems more concerned with focusing on this and supporting Will, than holding onto this hope that El is alive.

So even though Mike just got a sign that El is alive (which parallels to the initial evidence of her being alive outside his house, what literally initiated him to call out to her for almost a year), he doesn't revert back to his approach of not giving up. He sticks by his decision.

The irony of what happens with El the same night that Mike doesn't call, for the first time, is not lost on me...

Tragically, El doesn't know Mike actually gave up (just like she feared he did) because she lost her ability to communicate with him that night.

I wonder how differently things would have played out if she new the truth. Would she have held onto this really romanticized idea of her and Mike's relationship because he never gave up? Or would she have maybe reassured Mike that it was okay that he gave up and moved past it and still hoped and tried to make it work? Honestly, I think the later.

Because again, it's not Mike giving up that makes him a bad person or something that refutes his ability to love her romantically, it just means that it's not true that he never gave up.

And Mike being the only person to know this fact... Um... Cannot be good for him.

October 2nd (Day 355)

As El is trying to revive a modicum of hope that she can see Mike again through the void, to confirm her hopes that he didn't give up, by using the TV like she usually does, she discovers that the cord is broken. It's a lost cause.

On the other side of town, Mike is entirely focused on Will. The previous night, he did not reach out to El. He gave up. And El is none the wiser.

The writers made the choice to have one more night that Mike could have called El because he was at home that night on day 354, a day that actually involved an incident that you'd think would have reignited his hope that she was alive, before he inevitably jumped head first into focusing on Will, with him not being home for the rest of the season. They could have shown us Mike calling out to El from the other side of town, and then cut to her in her room not knowing... And yet, they didn't...

This is where I jump to the end, because the focus primarily when it comes to El and Mike's arcs for the rest of the season are with El trying to find her mom and discover more about herself, while Mike is trying to be there for Will in any way he can.

The sad part is that despite Mike giving up and trying to move on from El's death, that guilt is never really going to go away. He gave El expectations that she had to risk her life to find Will, and all of that built up and inadvertently led to her death.

But maybe Mike can right the wrongs he had El endure by following through on his focus of not letting Will die too? Maybe if Mike can save Will, El wouldn't have died for nothing?

But with this guilt and Mike trying to overcorrect it all, he's also experiencing very real and emotional moments with Will. Will is his best friend, and just a year ago Mike risked everything to get him back. A lot of those moments he experienced with El in s1, moments mixed with romantic expectations, are now also lingering here with him and his friend in s2. Except these aren't forced expectations. Everything Mike’s feeling and doing the entire time comes naturally to him, with none of it requiring pushing or advice from those around him. It's just pure instinct.

In the end, Mike's beside Joyce and Jonathan, who are sharing memories they have with Will to him in hopes it will prove to them he's still in there and able to be saved.

This emotional sequence builds up to Mike using his own memory of Will to try to reach him, one that comes off as platonic in every sense of the word, but visually, and when looked at in the grand scheme of things, especially with what is about to follow and those romantic expectations with El soon being thrust back on him... Well... Shit is about to get real messy.

Upon reuniting with El, Mike was quick to want to tell her that he never gave up, only for her to interrupt him with the exact number of days he called (before he gave up).

This is news to Mike for an abundance of reasons. It means he's not crazy and that El actually was alive those two times he saw her. All this (survivors) guilt that's been building up over the last year could have been avoided if he'd known that she didn't die, that she was okay.

It also means that for some reason, El heard him, and yet she doesn't know that he gave up...

And here Hopper is, revealing that he's been hiding her the whole time aka the perfect person for Mike to take all of this pent-up emotion out on.

Hopper then tells Mike that they will discuss this privately, which I find to be very interesting because it offers a chance for the viewer to see just a glimpse into Mike's emotional state at this moment, without everyone around to affect his ability to truly open up about how he's feeling. And not alone just anywhere in the house, but in Will's room...

Mike is understandably upset because El is alive and Hopper knew this whole time and didn't tell him.

While Hopper didn't technically lie to Mike, at least not in canon because we never got an outright scene on-screen of Mike asking Hopper if El was alive with him denying it (all while knowing she was), it's at the very least a lie of omission...

But the thing is, if Hopper not clueing Mike in on El being alive qualifies as a lie of omission (off-screen), so does Mike not telling El he gave up (on-screen).

If anything Mike's lie of omission also qualifies as a plain old lie, because he outright told El he didn't give up (lied) and didn't correct her when she informed him she knew he didn't. She fully believed it, despite him knowing deep down that it wasn't the full truth.

So while Mike is taking all of his anger out on Hopper as this fighting match comes to a head, it takes a turn.

Hopper is fine with Mike blaming him, he says it's 'okay'. But it's not. Nothing about this is okay to Mike, seeing as this isn't even the whole problem. It's not the problem Mike's actually hiding within his outburst in the first place.

Suddenly Mike starts screaming to Hopper that he's a 'disgusting, lying, piece of shit', chanting LIAR over and over and over again, shoving him repeatedly, only for him to fall into Hopper's arms and start crying, with Hopper reassuring him that he's okay.

Something tells me Mike's emotions here aren't all about Hopper...

Something tells me that Mike's fixation with the word liar doesn't apply to Hopper here as much as it applies to Mike himself (in his eyes)...

The main reason why I think this is what's actually going on here, is because there was no reason to put so much emphasize on this concept of Mike literally walking away that last time he called her.

Why go through the trouble of creating this misunderstanding, by having the TV not work, with El not being able to go into the void to see Mike, THE very night he gave up, if to not plant the seed that this misunderstanding was going to bear some significance? That this misunderstanding (lie? lie of omission?) was going to lead to El assuming Mike didn't give up, all while Mike knows he gave up, but going along with the story that he didn't, for both El's sake and his own?

BECAUSE it's a surprise tool that will help us later!

I also think it's interesting that they decided to have Will go off and dance with a girl at the snowball BEFORE Mike decided to devote himself to El here on out. Like... that is quite the choice after a season of highlighting this bond between Will and Mike where they promise to go crazy together, which is a moment we know Will took romantically.... So, is it possible Mike also took it romantically? We know Will also took Mike's speech to him in the shed romantically, so is it possible Mike did too, with that experience only heightening his emotions and confusion over his feelings for El when he found out she was alive shortly after, leading to his outburst? But then Will is going and dancing with the girl, and here we have Mike's own version of falling behind (the Time After Time lyrics were more literal than you think).

What if they didn't do all of that? Would things have maybe panned out slightly differently if Mike wasn't under the (incorrect) assumption that Will didn't take those moments romantically?

While Mike's guilt might have started in s1, when he played the biggest role in pushing expectations onto El to help them find Will, only for her to 'die', it doesn't end there. Mike's guilt only builds when he holds the knowledge that he did give up hoping she could be alive, all while allowing El to believe the opposite based on what she saw, which was a guiding force for not only her love and dedication to him flourishing, but also for him to then shift his own version of expectations onto himself going forward to make it up to El by trying to be who she wants him to be.

We see how romanticized 353 days is interpreted exclusively as meaning Mike has to be in love with El. But he did give up. So what does that mean for all of this? For their picture perfect love story?

What does it mean for Mike to hold onto this truth, a truth that makes him feel immense guilt, only for him to spend the next year or so making it up to her...?

It means either Mike has to come clean, or he has to deflect and double down.

What option do you think a guilt-ridden, repressed homosexual kid in the 80's is going to choose?

Answer? Deflect and double down.

In s3, Mike is so focused on worrying about El (giving her what he thinks she wants) so he can right all the building up of wrongs he has done at her expense since he met her, and as a result loses Will in the process (where have we heard this before...?)

Instead of Mike having a moment in s3 where he acknowledges that he himself was the first to ever refer to El as a weapon in the first place, to try to save Will in s1, he's now turning around and blaming the others for using El as a weapon 'for no reason'...

No reason? Really Mike? Is it for no reason, or is it just not a good enough reason to you this time?

Or maybe has Mike just actually spent enough time with El now to truly feel a bond with her in order to see her as a full person, slightly outside of this imaginary superhero he's cooked her up to be when he met her that day in the woods, the day his life started because she was his first and only hope of finding Will? (I say slightly bc... I mean we all saw what happened in s4?)

I honestly think it's a mix of both...

I also think it's not a coincidence that Mike doubling down instead of facing the truth about this manifestation of guilt only makes things worse for him. And El. And Will.

Because suddenly he's choosing this moment to blurt out that he loves and can't lose her again, in front of everyone, even to his own dismay and shock. And when El walks in and gives him a chance to say it to her himself, like any person whose in love with someone would want to do, to make them feel loved, he looks terrified.

And when the season ends and Mike is given another chance to say it finally, to El directly, in roughly the exact same spot he had his emotional outburst in the previous season over finding out she was alive at the same time he was still grappling with losing Will again, IN WILL'S ROOM, he freezes. He just lets what happens, happen.

Because after everything, with El right now in front of him, telling him she loves him while being fully convinced he loves her too after everything they've went through, how could he possibly take it back, or try to make her understand his complicated feelings about all of this?

Answer? He can't.

As hard as it is to believe (not that hard honestly based on his track record), Mike's deflection and stalling era is just beginning...

[lunatic-fandom-space]

i just saw a post that was obviously vagueing about that popular vampirism as disability post being like "OF COURSE a post being like 'what if vampires (bloodthirsty predators) were actually the victims and people reacting negatively were the villains' would do well on tumblr, this is the Nothing Is Ever Your Fault website" and it just pisses me off because its like, hey man. modern vampires (the ones that came about in victorian times, that are loosely based on eastern european folklore) have existed for like a hundred years now and people have been characterizing vampires as a 'species' in a bunch of different ways for just as long, and the person who made the original post clearly chose to characterize them as basically normal humans mentally but a bit fucked up physically. yknow, kind of like disabled people

[tousey-mousey]

My reasoning, personally, for not liking it much:

I didn't get to choose to be intersex, so I didn't get to choose whether it made me "queer". I got to choose to identify as my sexuality, I got to make that choice and opt INTO the queer community. However, being intersex isn't a choice you make, and it kind of sucks to be INFORMED? That I now have to call myself "queer" etc because of something I never got any say in.

Being intersex is pretty traumatic oftentimes? Like, being told "you don't have eggs or sperm, you have an elevated cancer rate, and you'll never be able to have kids" is fucking tragic. Being born with a DSD is even more tragic, as you're statistically highly likely to have been forced into having surgery you statistically didn't want which also takes away future choices and maybe, for example, makes it so you can never have pleasurable sex as an example some folks who had nonconsensual surgeries performed on them report.

And, in amongst this mix of "other people forcing choices on you that have permanent consequences and forever mark you as an outsider"... you have a bunch of dyadics who see an opportunity to make the queer community bigger. To, basically, claim more mental territory. It's a very human response, I get that? But it still sucks ass to be the territory being claimed.

I also resent the way that, when discussing trans issues, intersex people pretty much always become a tool. This is OVERWHELMINGLY when cis people do it, rather than trans people (who broadly Get It and don't want to make our lives harder), but trans people are people and some of them also make annoying choices. We're never allowed to have our own discussion without trans issues being wedged into the gap and prised open. We're never allowed to be discussed by dyadics unless it's as a weapon against trans people.

Whenever someone says "uh, uh, actually nonbinary people are real because intersex people exist!" they're contributing to this idea that:

Intersex people are nonbinary (a lot of us identify that way but most, myself included, do not)

Nonbinary people are only valid because of intersex people (they're valid on their own terms)

Nonbinary people are all intersex (¿¿¿No???)

Intersex people are these strange freaks of nature whose primary existence is as a useful counterpoint in an argument between two teams of cis people while trans people's existential rights hang in the balance and intersex people are turned into prop objects (...I mean this is basically how most dyadics end up using us, ngl)

Like?

This is just a long-ass list of "intersex people don't get to self-determine". Intersex people get told "you're going to play in the Queer sandbox now" and don't get to choose not to. We don't get to have our own identity if we want, or to opt OUT of being queer. We're just told... "you live here now".

Again.

---

Basically... let me be queer for reasons I chose. Don't impose something on me that I didn't. Don't tell me I'm included without asking whether I wanted to be, and don't force me to fit into your normalised box. I have my own identity.

IF YOU'RE NOT INTERSEX, PLEASE SHARE THIS.

Please note that I'm not gonna try to gatekeep intersex status, but if you're "not sure" if you're intersex or not then with all the love in the world, please select "not intersex" because this is more of a question for folks who have been through the trauma of being diagnosed as having 'You're Wrong And Different Disease' and then having to find their way to building an identity for themselves within that.

(Btw I am labelling it "not intersex" because everyone on the internet seems to have decided that the label for that is "perisex" and I fuckin hate that term for etymological reasons, I personally use "dyadic" but nobody else seems to have decided they like it so I'll just stick to "not intersex")

[kurokoros]

my biggest crackpot theory about chainsaw man is that actually *** **** ****.

[ilovemylawyer]

i love the EVIL part of EVILIVE btw. i find fucked up, unnameable unobtainable obsessive life-ending love extremely romantic and delicious. it’s the way things are in the evilive world! things are messy! and bad! and i love it! i (at least currently!!!) do not plan on writing anything pure fluff happiness because that is not something that i wish to extract from this show.. it isn’t there! i have no interest in erasing these harsh realities of evilive in my fics. happy lalala is not fun for me to write, and i won’t do it without a heavy underlying feeling of uneasiness and uncertainty and dread and despair and inevitable death. i like pain :/ and half of this couple is one of the most greedy selfish motherfuckers i have ever come to know and he’s oh so beautiful. so i am sorry if you finished evilive and wanted some kind of fix-it happy gays but i am NOTTTTTTTT the guy for that.

[springcatalyst]

thinking oc thoughts. everything comes back to milo being a storyteller

[rivilu]

There's pieces of media that alter your brain chemistry and then there's pieces of media that rearrange you on a molecular level

[hazardsoflove]

i do really love how your choices from other da games affect inquisition so much because it turned my warden and alistair’s love story into a horrible tragedy against my will