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âFIDELITYâ |part9
MASTERLIST -`âŽÂ´- Rafe Cameron x Kook!Reader x JJ Maybank
Summary: Kook!Readerâs world is upended by betrayal, and her only way forward might lie with the most unlikely personâJJ Maybank. But as they build a new life together, old flames and past mistakes refuse to stay buried.
Warnings: mentioning miscarriage, blood, mentioning drug and alcohol use, daddy issues
Selly's note: First of all I'm sorry. I wrote this while my heart was broken. I learned my ex left the country. He was the first person I loved. LIKE COME BACK???? We HAVE TO marry!!!!! Sorry for oversharingđ, and if there is a mistake. I didn't re-read this. Love y'all.đđ
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Your hands trembled. Your whole body felt numb, yet the shaking tethered you to reality. There was a heavy weight on your chest, as though even breathing had become an uphill battle. A knot in your throat tightened with every passing second, making even the simple act of swallowing painful. You didnât know what to do. The chaos of the moment was tearing your mind into pieces, your thoughts tangling into a knot so thick you couldnât unravel it.Â
You hadnât done anything unusual. The day had started like any other. You made yourself some herbal tea, watched TV, read a book about baby development. You cleaned the house a little, then opened the packages that had arrivedâitems for your daughterâs room.Â
Alone.Â
Since the moment you arrived in this town, youâd always felt alone, but this was different. This was like falling into a deep, endless chasm, where there was nothing to grasp, no hand to reach for. You could feel your hands flailing in the void, desperately searching, yet finding nothing.Â
The warm, sticky sensation spreading down your legs sent a jolt of panic through you. Your eyes flicked downward involuntarily, but you didnât want to look. Yet it felt as if everything around you was betraying you, even the streetlamp outside, which cast its harsh glow on the spreading pool on the floor. You didnât want to see it. You feared that seeing it would confirm your worst fears. Your eyes filled with tears, but you couldnât cry. You wouldnât cry. Would tears ease the crushing weight of this fear? You doubted it.Â
You reached for your phone, but even your fingers trembled. Touching the screen, dialing a number, selecting a nameâit all felt like an impossible task. The chaos in your mind blurred your thoughts. Everything was moving too fast and too slow all at once. Seconds stretched into eternities, yet time pressed on, dragging you deeper into helplessness.Â
You hadnât wanted this. You had left the island just for this pregnancy, determined to build a life here. And now, was it all going to be taken from you? After all the effort to adjust, after everything?Â
You glanced around. The silence of the room pressed down on you like a weight. It felt as if the entire world had pulled away, leaving you stranded. You knew there were peopleâso many peopleâbut none of them were close, not really. Placing your hands on your belly, you clung to the small hope that the motion could somehow quiet the storm of fear inside you. But it didnât work.Â
The voices of fear echoed in your mind: What if Iâm too late? What if itâs over? What if this loneliness never ends? Each scenario was scarier than the last. You closed your eyes, but even the darkness offered no solace. The images in your head only fanned the flames of your terror.Â
When you finally held the phone in your hand, you knew you had to choose someone to call. Should it be your mom? Or your dad? Maybe⌠someone else? But what if they couldnât come? That thought pushed you deeper into despair. It suddenly felt as if the entire world had turned its back on you, as if every person was out of reach. The weight of isolation was crushing.Â
Your hands were cold and clammy. As your fingers hovered over the screen, trying to pick a name, you felt frozen. You couldnât move them. It was as though your brain had redirected all its attention to the fluid trickling down your legs and the stabbing pain in your abdomen. Panic consumed you, leaving you paralyzed and unsure of what to do.Â
A quiet voice in your mind whispered, Everything will be okay. But it was impossible to believe. That voice was so faint, so far away, drowned out by the louder, darker thoughts. Reality felt so distant that even hope seemed like a luxury you couldnât afford. While your mind scrambled for answers, your body refused to move.Â
You tightened your grip on your belly, as though holding on harder could anchor you to something, anything. Alone in that dark, silent room, you had never felt smaller. The outside world was shut off from you, leaving only your fears, your thoughts, and the suffocating weight of solitude.Â
Since moving to this town, youâd thought a lot about loneliness. But now, you truly understood its meaning. Loneliness wasnât just sitting in silence. It wasnât merely being by yourself. Loneliness was not having anyone to reach when you needed them most. It was feeling as though your voice couldnât reach anyone, as though you were invisible.Â
The trembling didnât stop. Your eyes darted around, trying to focus on something, anything, but everything was blurryânot because you couldnât see, but because you couldnât concentrate. Nothing made sense in that moment.Â
You searched for a way out. But maybe the only thing you could do was wait. That thought terrified you even more. Waiting... it made you feel so helpless, so powerless. But what else could you do?Â
Tears welled up again as you struggled to breathe. But each breath felt heavier, each inhale pulling the loneliness deeper into your chest. That loneliness, like a black hole, seemed ready to devour you.Â
You couldnât bring yourself to look at the pool of liquid spreading on the floor. You couldnât face it. If you didnât look, maybe it would stay a bad dream. Maybe this was just paranoia playing tricks on your mind.Â
Even though you could feel the warm liquid dripping down your legs, you clung to the hope that youâd wake up. That youâd open your eyes in bed and thank God it was just a nightmare.Â
You wanted to wake up. You didnât want to believe this was real. Not after everything you had done to adjust to this new life. Not after leaving the island to start fresh.Â
You had left everything behind. Everyone.Â
For a life with your baby.Â
You had wanted this baby. Even with your initial doubts, you had wanted it. And for what? To have it taken from you?Â
Your eyes shut tight as your hand clenched the phone and your other hand pressed harder against your belly. You wished the pain would stop, that the acheâso reminiscent of a menstrual crampâwould just go away.Â
Only days ago, youâd noticed your belly start to show, a tiny swell that made you smile. You had cradled it with your hands, talked to it, even though you didnât care if it could hear. You wanted it to know you were there. Just a few days ago, youâd been excited about buying clothes for it.Â
For this?Â
For it to be taken away?Â
When you finally opened your eyes, the only sound in the room was the ticking of the clock. You wanted to block it out. You wanted the sensation in your legs to disappear. For a moment, you convinced yourself it was all in your head. But the warm trickle that followed was a harsh slap of reality.Â
Your trembling eyes drifted downward. The sight of the blood pooled on the floor knocked the breath out of you. Your heart skipped, as if an elephant had perched on your chest. Your legs gave way. Falling to the floor hurt, but it was nothing compared to the pain in your chest.Â
You had never seen them. Theyâd only been with you for five months, but the thought of that bond breakingâof losing themâfelt like your heart was being ripped out.Â
When you love something so deeply, does it always have to be taken away? Is that just the way life works? Had everything led to this moment?Â
Had you fought with your family, with Rafe, for this? Had you left your entire life behind, moved to this town, just to lose your baby?Â
Even your family had started to share your joy. They were thrilled for you, as ecstatic as you were. And now, for what? For this?Â
Were you supposed to mourn?
To learn a lesson, did you really have to fall this hard? You hated it. You didnât want to learn any more lessons. Not if they hurt this much. If growth meant falling like this, you were ready to stay exactly the sameâstagnant, unchanging, and safe.Â
The moment you felt a fragment of clarity, just enough to push panic aside, you called 911. You couldnât afford to lose more time. It felt like your mind had snapped back into place, even if only temporarily.Â
But you had no idea what you were saying. Your words felt foreign, disjointed, even as you tried to describe what was happening. They assured you theyâd come to your home. They told you not to hang up.
Then you realizedâyou needed to call your family. You needed them with you. Right now, you just wanted to be back in Outer Banks, in your own house, surrounded by the people who had always been there for you.Â
If you were there, you wouldnât feel this crushing loneliness. They would be by your side.Â
You didnât even know how many times you tried. Your fingers repeatedly dialed your momâs number, then your dadâs, over and over again. Each time, you were met with the same recorded message: unreachable.Â
Still, you kept calling, clinging to that faint hope that someone, anyone, would answer. But each attempt ended the same way, the monotone voice echoing the same result.Â
And then, without thinking, your fingers moved on their own. They dialed his number. In that moment, you didnât care about shame or pride. All that mattered was that you needed help. You needed Rafe. Even if the chance was slim, even if it was just a sliver of hope, you needed him to answer.Â
As the phone rang, your heart pounded so violently it felt like it would burst out of your chest. Each ring amplified the fragile hope blooming inside you. Your lips moved as if uttering a prayer: âPlease pick up.â You needed someoneâanyoneâto be there, to tell you that everything was going to be okay. Tears streamed down your face as the call rang on, unanswered.
He wouldnât ignore you, you told yourself. He wouldnât turn you away. Heâd come. You knew he would. He had to. You prayed he wasnât still angry, that he didnât hate you for not terminating the pregnancy.Â
When the call ended without an answer, you didnât stop. Your trembling hands hit redial without hesitation. Shame and pride were irrelevant now. You needed him. If he wouldnât come, you needed him to reach your family. You were utterly alone otherwise.Â
Alone. The word echoed like a hollow drumbeat in your chest.Â
For a moment, time seemed to stop. The racing of your heart, the chaotic swirl of your thoughts, even your tearsâall stilled in the suffocating silence of your own helplessness. But you didnât give up. You called again. And again. Your trembling fingers barely functioned, struggling to tap the screen. But you kept trying.
Fuck pride. You needed help. You needed someone by your side, someone to hold you, someone to tell you it wasnât the end. Your lips quivered as you let out a stifled sob. âPleaseâŚâ When the call went to voicemail yet again, your shoulders shook with the weight of another unanswered prayer.Â
Wasnât this his baby too? Didnât it matter to him? You hadnât made this baby alone. Surely he would care. You didnât need him to grieve with you. You just needed him here. And he would come. Rafe was a lot of things, but when it came down to it, he wouldnât leave you stranded.Â
Not you.Â
You had to believe that. You clung to that hope like a lifeline, begging for it to still be true.Â
Another sob tore through you, reverberating through the empty room. This time, it came from somewhere so deep inside that it left your chest heavy, crushed under the weight of despair. You prayed heâd answer.
You werenât strong enough to endure this.Â
You didnât want to do this alone. You fought to steady your trembling lips, desperate to string together the words youâd need to say if he picked upâwhen he picked up. But once again, the line went dead.
This time, it felt like a door slamming in your face. But it wasnât just rejectionâit was the crumbling of a trust you hadnât even realized you still held onto. Deep down, you had truly believed he would answer. That heâd help you. That he wouldnât leave you to face this on your own.Â
As the silence deepened, your hands fell to the cold floor, sticky with blood. You didnât even care. You felt like everything you wanted, everything youâd dreamed of, was slipping through your fingers. Did you not deserve happiness? Had you done something so wrong to deserve this?Â
You wanted to scream. To set the house on fire, to rip apart the tiny baby clothes youâd just bought.Â
You nearly buried your face in your hands, but the sight of blood on your fingers stopped you. Frantically, you wiped them on your nightgown, trying to erase it. You wanted it goneâneeded it gone. You wanted to forget everything that had happened today.Â
The phone was still in your hand, your fingers gripping it like it held a flicker of hope. Rafe hadnât answered. Your family hadnât answered. Their silence only pushed you deeper into yourself. Your tears began to dry, replaced by a hollow ache gnawing at your insides.Â
After your final attempt, you let the screen go dark. The reflection of your tear-streaked face stared back at you from the blackened screen, ghostly and unfamiliar. Your lips still trembled with silent cries, your voice barely audible even to yourself.Â
Then, the phone buzzed. The unexpected vibration made you flinch. The screen lit up, and your heart stuttered before racing into overdrive. A message.Â
When you saw the name, a fraction of the emptiness lifted. JJ. His name sat there like it belonged, as if the chaos hadnât touched it. You opened the message, holding your breath.Â
Howâs it going with your new street animal buddies? Found yourself a soulmate yet?
It was stupid. Ridiculous. But somehow, in all its absurdity, that sarcastic tone cracked something open inside you. A tiny window of light broke through the storm.Â
And yet, the relief was fleeting. Looking at the message, then back at the blood pooling on the floor, your emotions surged in a tangle of anger, helplessness, and unrelenting fear.Â
You needed him. Right now. Without thinking, your trembling fingers scrolled back to his name.
The name on the screen made your eyes well up. JJ. So ordinary, so simple. Yet, at that moment, it felt like your only tether to life. Heâd come. He would, wouldnât he?Â
With trembling hands, you pressed the call button. As you held the phone to your ear, the silence was broken only by the erratic pounding of your heart. Each ring sent a jolt of panic through youâwhat if he didnât answer? âPleaseâŚâ you whispered, barely audible. âPlease pick upâŚâ
It felt like you were losing your mind. Was this real? Had he really sent that message?Â
âHey, Princess. I noticed weâve upped the calls lately. Canât manage without me, huhââ
The distant sound of sirens reached your ears, and your lips quivered. Even JJâs voice, with its usual cocky tone, felt like an anchor. Just hearing him talk, hearing that familiar teasing edgeâit was everything. It made you feel as if youâd already done all you could.Â
âI need you here.âÂ
The words came out shakily, and there was a pause on the other end of the line. One hand rested in your lap, the other gripping the phone, both stained with blood.Â
To be honest, you were terrified. Not just about what might happen but about losing the baby.Â
âWhatâs wrong?â His voice had lost its playful tone, replaced with a sharp seriousness. He was waiting for an answer, but you felt too drained, too scared, to put your fears into words. Saying the possibility of a miscarriage out loud felt impossible.Â
How did he always know? How could he tell when you needed him the most? Was he like this with everyone, or just you?Â
When he said your name, you tried to take a deep breath, but it came out broken and shallow. The sirens were getting closer. âIâm bleeding.â The weight of the words nearly crushed you as they left your lips, leaving you lightheadedânot from pain, but from the sheer gravity of it.Â
You were so used to him being there. The idea of him leaving, of him not being there, was unbearable. âI called everyone, butââ
âIâm on the way. Did you call 911? Listen, Iâll be there, okay? Donât worry. Iâll get there as fast as I can. Youâll be fine. Youâre going to be fine. Iâll meet you at the hospital. Okay? I need you to say something.â His words were quick, determined, unwavering.Â
You nodded instinctively, even though you knew he couldnât see it. Even if this was your fate, you didnât want to accept it.Â
âIâm scared.â A sob escaped your lips as the sirens grew louder. They were on your street.Â
âIâm coming. Everythingâs going to be okay.â
â
Last night was ordinary. A night that fell short of expectationsânot that Rafe knew what he was expecting anymore. He had become a ghost of himself, far from anything resembling pride.Â
Had he ever been proud of himself, really?Â
He couldnât focus on the future or the present; he was stuck in the past.Â
His eyes had searched for you everywhere. There wasnât a corner of the Outer Banks he hadnât roamed. The beach, parties, the country clubâheâd scoured them all, just to catch a glimpse of you.Â
He even shopped at the grocery store near your house, the one far from his own. Almost every day, heâd find himself there, grabbing a drink, some crackers, whatever he could justify, just to linger for a chance to see you.Â
He missed your presence. Your scent.Â
He missed the moments in bed with youânot the sex, but the times he held you in his arms, kissed you, and just existed in your warmth. He missed looking into your eyes, the overwhelming urge to tell you he loved you.Â
But Rafe was a coward. He couldnât admit that to anyone, not even himself. And you? You already knew. You didnât need to hear it from anyone.Â
He hadnât told his father. He hadnât told anyoneâTopper, Kelce, Sarah, even Wheezie. Not that anyone else could really understand.Â
You were the only one who truly knew him. And heâd lost you. Because he was a coward.Â
He missed the sound of your voice. If he could go back, heâd want you to talk more in those old videos. Heâd spend hours talking to you if he had the chance again.Â
He couldnât adjust to your absence.Â
When he threw himself into alcohol, he didnât think much about it. When had he ever truly sat down and thought anything through? All he knew was how to make impulsive decisions that wrecked his life.Â
He couldnât stand Topper and Kelceâs phases of chasing random girls, calling them over, laughing at nothing. Rafeâs mind, body, and soul belonged to you. He couldnât bring himself to touch or even look at anyone else.Â
Every time he closed his eyes, every time he tried to sleep, the only image in his head was your face.Â
He hadnât touched another woman. Not that he tried. He knew he couldnât. It wouldnât be the same. They wouldnât be you.Â
There was a time when he thrived on quick, meaningless flings. He hated attachmentsâblamed it on his childhood. He figured it was because he didnât know what it meant to make love. He never let emotions into it. But with you, it was different.Â
It was intoxicatingâbetter than anything drugs had ever made him feel. It was addictive.Â
He loved whispering âI love youâ while he was with you. It made him feel like less of the mess he knew he was. But even then, he hadnât said it enoughâlike the idiot he was.Â
You had been gone from his life for almost four months, and the void was unbearable. Not even when heâd tried to quit drugs had he craved their presence the way he craved yours.Â
It was like he was a teenager nursing his first heartbreak. And yet, somehow, this was the mildest punishment he thought he deserved for his cowardice.Â
Heâd worked so hard to get Wardâs approval, to finally be seen by his father. Ward was noticing him now, for the first time. He could see Rafeâs potential, and Rafe knew it. For once, it wasnât Sarah he was looking atâit was him.Â
For the first time, Ward saw Rafe accomplishing something for Cameron Development. For the first time, Rafe gave his father the impression that he was capable of more. After years of begging for attention, Rafe was finally getting it.Â
But it had cost him you.Â
He couldnât bear the thought of losing his fatherâs approval. He couldnât face that rejection again. Ward had finally placed a hand on his shoulder, and Rafe didnât want to feel that hand pulled away.Â
He hadnât wanted to lose you, either. That was never part of the plan. It just⌠happened. Too fast. And heâd been too scared.Â
Scared of seeing that disappointment in his fatherâs eyes again.Â
Everyone around him noticed his spiraling depression, even Topper and Kelce. Though he never opened up to them, they could tell something was wrong. If they noticed, then everyone else mustâve, too. Not that Rafe cared. Nobody dared bring it up to him anyway.Â
Under Topper and Kelceâs relentless pressure, he found himself at a party. Not to have fun. Not to let loose. But to see you. He spent the night searching for you, glancing around like you might walk in at any second.Â
He looked for your old friends, the ones heâd seen you with before. He hoped youâd be there, even though he knew it was unlikely. You were pregnant. You probably wouldnât come. But the possibility, however slim, was enough to drag him there.Â
That same possibility kept him shopping near your place, day after day.Â
For the chance of you.Â
The more he didnât see you, the more he drank, as if alcohol could drown out the ache. Nothing could fill the emptiness you left behind, but he still clung to his glass, hopingâmaybe if he drank enough, heâd hallucinate you.Â
He didnât know how much he drank. It didnât even feel like a party. Topper and Kelce flirted and joked with girls, but Rafe didnât bother looking their way. He just drank and searched.Â
You were the one who used to go to parties with him. You were his girl. And Rafe? He was yours. It wasnât an open relationship; he wouldnât have shared you with anyone.Â
You used to pull him onto the dance floor. Heâd groan and complain at first, but you always got your way. And once he gave in, he didnât hate it. Not when he was touching you. He loved every moment he could hold you.Â
Even now, he could hear your voice in his head, persuading him to dance. Him pretending to resist. You insisting, until he finally caved. What an idiot heâd been. He shouldâve just said yes every time. Done anything you asked.Â
His regrets were endless. His self-loathing, boundless. For being such a coward. For being a failure, yet again.Â
You had believed in him, even when he didnât believe in himself. Your faith in him had given him the courage to ask his father for opportunities, small as they were. And with you, heâd felt like heâd succeeded, just a little.Â
Now he hated himself for choosing his fatherâs approval over youâand the baby.Â
The thought of you moving on, raising a child without him, was unbearable. Every time he closed his eyes, he saw you with your swollen belly, or playing with your childâhis child. And the thought of not being there...Â
He hated himself for fearing his father more than losing you. For crawling for scraps of his fatherâs affection like some pathetic creature.Â
Which he was.Â
And now, for the rest of his life, he would hate this momentâand himselfâfor choosing so poorly.Â
Rafe thought heâd made it home thanks to Topper and Kelce. He vaguely remembered stumbling through the front door and collapsing into Wheezieâs arms. The idea that the tiny girl could hold him up was almost laughable. Somehow, heâd managed to make it to his room.
Wheezie had laid him down on his bed before leaving. Youâd have to be an idiot not to notice something was wrong. She knew her brother too well. She hadnât seen him this quiet, this withdrawn, in a long time.
You were always there with him.
When you were around, Wheezie could hear your laughter coming from Rafeâs room. Even when Rafe was being his usual insufferable self, you made him bearable. She never thought he had that side to him. Frankly, she wasnât even sure it existed until you came along.
When Rafe opened his eyes the next morning, a sharp, pounding headache greeted him like a cruel companion. The remnants of last nightâs party echoed in his skull. Sitting up in bed, hungover and disoriented, fragments of the night before started to drift back into focusâcrowds, noise, laughter. The sunlight filtering through the curtains hit him square in the face, intensifying the pain. All he wanted was to throw up and stay in bed for the rest of the day.
He didnât remember much, just that he went to the party and drank like it was his last night on Earth. Alcohol had been a more reliable friend than Topper or Kelce that night.
Rubbing his hands over his face, he tried to shake off the fog. The smellâhis own and the roomâsâwas rancid, like a stale cocktail of sweat and regret.
He kicked off the covers, intending to get up, when his eyes landed on a single pill and a glass of water sitting on the bedside table. Without thinking, he swallowed the pill and drained the glass.
Stumbling to the window, he threw it open, letting fresh air seep in. He took a quick shower, practically praying for relief from the headache that felt like it was splitting his skull in two. The cold water shocked his system, but it wasnât enough. He wanted to crawl into a dark room and hide there for a week.
Out of the shower, he wrapped a towel around his neck and caught a glimpse of his reflection. Dark circles framed his eyes, his face bore the fatigue of a man who hadnât truly rested in years. The weight pressing down on him wasnât just from the alcohol; it was everything else. Everything heâd tried to suppress. âYou really are a master at screwing things up,â he muttered bitterly at himself.
His gaze drifted around the roomâclothes tossed haphazardly on the bed, an empty bottle lying on the floor, a lighter on the nightstand. Even the carpet under his feet made his skin crawl. He needed to pull himself together, maybe eat something, grab a coffee. But first, his phone.
It sat there on the edge of the table, an unspoken threat. Reaching for it, a wave of unease washed over him. He didnât know who heâd talked to, what heâd said, or worse, what heâd texted. His fingers trembled as he picked it up and unlocked the screen.
Notifications flooded inâgroup chats, Instagram likesâand then, there they were. Three missed calls.
From you.
His breath hitched. He stared at the screen, the timestamp mocking him. Midnight. One after the other. His thumb hovered over the call log, uncertainty gripping him. Why had you called?Â
And why at midnight?
It couldnât be. Not you. Not after everything. You never made the first move, especially not in the middle of the night.Â
For a moment, he considered calling you back. His thumb ghosted over your name. Should he? Maybe. Or maybe not. What if it led to the same argumentsâabout the baby, about why you didnât want to stay, about why he let you go? He could still feel the weight of everything left unsaid between you, haunting him like a shadow.
He dropped the phone back onto the table, running his hands through his hair. Deep down, he knew these questions were rhetorical. No matter how hard he tried to convince himself otherwise, he hadnât stopped thinking about youâor the life you mightâve had together.
Rising from the bed, he moved to his closet, grabbing the first shirt he saw. A hollow ache settled in his chest as he debated whether to call. The courage heâd relied on last night felt a thousand miles away.
Just then, the phone buzzed. Another notification. His heart skipped. Was it you? No. Someone else. But the fleeting hope that it mightâve been you twisted something inside him.
Setting the phone down again, he took a deep breath. *Calm down,* he told himself. But calming down was impossible. The unease coiled tighter, mixing guilt and longing into a cocktail of misery.
Without thinking too much, he hit your name and let the call go through. The ringing filled the room, amplifying his heartbeat. What if you were asleep? What if he woke you? He hated the idea of disturbing you.
The line clicked off before you answered. His worry deepened. What if something had happened to you? His fingers hovered, then dialed again, this time with more urgency.
The second call rang longer. Each tone ratcheted up his anxiety. And then, finally, the line connected.Â
âHey,â Your voice was quiet, cautious.
For a moment, Rafeâs words stuck in his throat. He tried to speak, but it felt like someone had stolen his voice. Finally, he managed, âHey⌠uh, you called me?â
It sounded weak, tentative. But hearing your voice, even like this, sent a pang straight through him. He missed you more than he could put into words.
A pause. The silence stretched, making him wonder if you were about to hang up. Then you answered, âI was drunk.â
The words hit him like a slap. Drunk? That was it? Just a drunk dial? The thought made his stomach twist. Was it really that meaningless?
âAre you okay?â he asked, this time more firmly, though it took everything not to press harder.
âIâm fine.â But your tone was too quick, too dismissive. He knew you better than that. He could always tell when you were lying. But he didnât push. Maybe he didnât want to know the truth.
âAlright,â he said, not knowing what else to say. He wanted to keep you on the line, to hear more, to find some excuse to hold onto this moment.
âOkay,â you said, your voice faltering briefly before you caught yourself. âI have to go.â
And just like that, the call ended. The short beep that followed felt like a final blow, sealing the unbearable silence around him.
Rafe stared at the phone. Drunk. The word echoed in his head. It collided with another thought, one that sent a chill through him. Did she�
Had you gone through with it? The decision heâd pushed you toward but never truly wanted? Heâd convinced himself it was the right thing to do, but now the thought made his chest tighten unbearably.
He slumped back into his chair, burying his face in his hands. He didnât know how to feelârelief, regret, or something else entirely. But one thing was clear: he hadnât stopped loving you. And that realization hit him harder than anything else.
He glanced at the phone one last time. Your name was still there on the screen, a painful reminder of everything heâd lost.Â
He thought about texting you but stopped. No words felt right. Maybe silence was all he deserved. After all, what was left to say when youâd already walked away for good?
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"I think I'm going insane."
Val jumps, almost bumping her head up against the underside of the car above her, at the sudden sound of Steph's voice echoing in the garage.
It's been about an hour since Jay finally got Danny's reply texts. He left, now assured that Danny was awake and understood it was a misunderstanding, to hopefully ask Danny out.
"Insane?" Val echoes, rolling out on the creeper until she can sit up, grabbing a rag to clear up the grease all over her arms as best she can.
Jay had told her to go home, along with the rest of the mechanics, but in his rush he had left a broken down Mazda leaking so she wasn't exactly going to just leave it like that.
Plus, she's gonna be staying far away from the apartment until she's 100% it's all clear. Maybe crash Sam and Tuck's hotel room, stay with them just in case.
"Insane," Steph confirms, looking like some kind of art piece leaning on Jay's work table across the room, "Y'know, like that Einstein quote."
"I'm not sure I follow," Val scrunches up her nose, thoroughly confused. She gets up, tossing the rag and heading towards her sudden guest.
She's technically not allowed to be doing these types of repairs, considering she lacks the certifications, but she thought she might as well finish it up for Jay to look over tomorrow before heading home, so the timing of the other girl's visit is at least perfect.
Steph watches her as she twirls a finger through her hair, pretty blue eyes half lidded and pouting with her very kissable lips. Val looks away to focus on clearing up her workspace.
"Insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results." Steph quotes, and oh, right. Conversation was happening.
"Actually," Val starts, slipping the top part of her coveralls off and wiping her face and thoroughly ruining the white teeshirt she's got under, "Rita Mae Brown said that quote. Well, wrote it in her book."
She realizes a little too late that that might sound too condescending, so she course corrects, "But anyway, what are you doing that's making you insane?"
She turns to look at Steph, jumping once more at how close Steph suddenly is. Val's backed up against her work table, Steph looming over her with all of her 3 inch height advantage. A metal tool falls over the side of the table, Val's not sure which one, from the resulting bump.
They stare at each other, Val profusely thanking any and all Gods, Ancients, whatever Higher Beings out there that her dark skin makes it harder to see if she's blushing. Not that it helps when Val's probably staring at Steph's mouth like a loon.
A long moment passes, Val somehow finding it within her to tear her eyes away from the other girl's mouthâdid she mention how kissable they looked?âand staring somewhere off to the side, confused.
"Flirting, Val!" Steph groans, throwing her hands up and stalking away to pace back and forth, "I've been flirting with you since we've met!"
"What? No." Val says, scoffing, "I'd notice if you were flirting with me."
Steph gives her a look that promises some kind of spar in the future that will cause Val to possibly lose feeling in all her limbs. Val shivers at it, sure that something's wrong with her if that turns her on, as she watches the blonde take off her jacket and prowl forward towards her.
"You're so fucking stupid." Steph says, the profanity of it shocking Val enough that she doesn't react when the other girl fists a hand into her shirt to pull her forcefully towards her into a searing, almost painful kiss.
Val feels like she's having an out of body experience, like lights have blinded her. But Steph's lips are soft, her hands are holding Val's hips, her body is pressing up against Val's and Val's definitely been stupid because they could have been doing this the whole god damn time.
But she kisses back, and that's all that matters. She kisses back, and somehow her body knows how to do the rest.
Her hands trail up Steph's biceps, feeling the soft cotton of the sleeves, trailing up to drape over the other girl's neck. She tilts he head to get the angle a little better, tiptoeing just a bit to make up the distance. The kiss isn't urgent, despite the sudden nature of it. The kiss, kisses, are soft, reaching, insistent. Small little things that cumulate one on top of the other, breathing into each other's spaces, bodies trying to melt into one another.
Steph's hands roam up towards the small of her back, Val arching at the feeling of it, and Steph must like that because she moans into her mouth like it hurts. Between one breath and the next, tongues are involved, and Steph tastes divine.
It's enough to make Val lose it. Her hands trail back down to Steph's waist, bunching up the fabric as she clutches the other girl closer. It frees up space for Steph to loop her long arms around Val's neck this time, gives Val the opening she needs.
She grips tight, spinning them around and lifting Steph onto the table. The other girl graciously makes room to accommodate Val's bulk, long legs wrapping around Val's waist as her hands trail down to trace the seams of the rough denim of the other girl's jeans.
Steph pulls Val down with the arms around her neck as she leans back and what is Val to do but respond? Her hands end up gripping Steph's thighs, and the heat of her is intoxicating. It's like Val's burning from the inside out, flames licking at the roof of her mouth and trickling down her throat, pooling in her stomach and radiating a heat that threatens to melt her.
And yet still, still, the heat of Steph consumes her.
Val detaches from the other girl now, to take a moment in the steamy haze. She braces one hand on the table below them, giving her abs a much needed break from hovering over the other girl, and just breathes.
Steph is beautiful.
Val stands over her, splayed over her work table like a vision from a dream straight from some romance era painting that Val could never hope to conjure up in her most fantastical dreams. Milky white skin, pearl blue eyes, a flush that Val wants to follow helplessly with her lips, her tongue, her fingers. Her blonde hair fans out around her like a halo, scrunched and mussed and silky and beautiful.
Val was already breathless from the kissing, but now it feels like the entire room has deprived her of air.
"You're beautiful." Val breathes out with the last of her oxygen. It's worth it. It's so worth it.
Steph, who had been half lidded and dazed, quirks a soft smile. Her entire body seems to soften with it, muscles loose and arms still lazily looped around Val's neck, squeezing just a little bit, a quick little hug.
"You're not so bad yourself, you know." Steph whispers back, voice husky as she brings a hand to trace over Val's cheek, her brow. She leans up to give Val a soft peck on her cheek, and the tingles of it warm her, makes her close her eyes to lean her forehead down onto Steph's, to breathe her air, to share space.
"As nice as this is," Val starts, "I want to be clearâŚI don't want this to just be a fling."
If her relationship with Danny taught her anything, it was that communication was important.
"I like you, Val. I want to get to know you more, date a little." She pauses, smiles a wry smile, "Or at least, go on dates and have you know they're dates too. MaybeâŚgirlfriends? In the future?"
Relief and embarrassment floods through her. "Yeah, yeah that sounds great. And uh, sorry. For, y'know, bein' stupid."
She curls down to bring Steph into a hug, lifting her a bit to make room for her arms against the hard wood of the table below, burying her face into the space where Steph's neck and shoulder meet, laying a kiss as gently as she can to the place she rests.
She feels the shiver that wracks through Steph from the action, feels the way her legs tighten around her, and Val breathes and breathes and breathes her in, clutching tighter.
"You're forgiven. Besides," Steph sniffs, "I wasn't going to let you take me here and now. I'm classier than that."
Val chokes on a laugh, muffling it into the other girl's shoulder. "Wouldn't have been hygienic anyway." Val wiggles a hand out, showing off the grease and oil, "Sorry about the shirt. And pants."
"I can't complain." Steph laughs, and it lights Val up. "I was the one who jumped you, after all."
"Serves you right." Val mumbles as she wraps her arm back around the other girl, causing another precious laugh.
"Can I touch your hair?" Steph's hands are rubbing her back up and down now, migrating shyly up to the back of her neck.
"Yeah, 'course." Val mumbles, trying her damnedest to become a part of the lovely girl beneath her.
Delicately, Steph seems to fiddle with her hair, as if twirling a finger through each dread, one by one.
It's a long peaceful moment before Steph breaks the silence again.
"Now that we've established that you're a moron," Her tone is soft and sweet despite the words, "and that I'm clearly moron-sexualâŚ" Val snorts, causing Steph to whack her on the back of the shoulder lightly for the interruption.
"Wanna get some ice cream?" Val lifts up, loathe as she is to separate from the blonde, beaming, "My treat."
Steph rewards her with a smile so soft, a lovely little thing, as she curls up to give her a kiss on the cheek and whisper her answer into Val's ear.
"Thought you'd never ask."
Mechanic!Val AU, but make it gay and sapphic.
ya'll can thank the HH discord for this one. Specifically the menace known as @clockwayswrites (and @impyssadobsessions for the art that inspired the damn thing)
Dead on Main and with some future Val/Steph >)
also @belfry-ghost did a doodle for this AU and everyone should go love on his art. Val's so unf.
===
Valâs pretty sure her new boss Jay is actually a crime lord.
Sheâs pretty sure heâs The Crime Lord, actually. Sheâs like, 98% sure she works for Red Hood now, and sheâs low key mad about it. She squints at the man now, with his white streak and almost imperceptible green sheen to his eyes.Â
The problem is that Val did perceive it. Because she used to date a guy whose baby blue eyes changed ever so slightly in the same way. Thinking about Danny makes her even madder.
To be clear, sheâs not mad about Red Hood himself.Â
Sheâs just mad that, of all the mechanic shops in all of Crime Alley, she just had to work for her ex-boyfriendâs third place Hall Pass pick. It also makes her miss her friends way more, and Val is hardly what one would call a well-adjusted woman, so sheâs mad about it.
She huffs as she lifts the hood of the second car sheâs working on today. Being a mechanic wasnât really on the docket for Valâs life goals, nor was being in Gotham, but she got a full ticket ride on Wayne Foundation scholarships, and honestly?Â
Gotham is Amity Park Lite: Gargoyles and Furries Edition.Â
Between a full ride to Gotham U and being stuck at Elmerton Community College? The choice was easy.Â
So here she is, working for the resident Crime Lord in his civvies.Â
Jay pays good, teaches her what she needs to know, and bonus: he sometimes helps with her English Literature class. Heâs flexible on hours, and sheâs even got rudimentary insurance.Â
All in All? It could be worseâshe could still be working for Vlad, after all.Â
It's the little things.
#and there it is!#the finale#i have some extra scenes planned#but the âmain storyâ part is done :)#what extra scenes would ya'll want to see in this AU?#id love to hear your ideas :D#who knows#it might spark joy in me to write it#i'm sorry about the fucked up reblogging#i have to be better about that....#thanks for being patient with me#dpxdc#dcxdp#dp x dc#dc x dp#my writing#danny phantom#dcu#dead on main#danny/jason#danny fenton#valerie gray#stephanie brown/valerie gray#red hood#jason todd#mechanic val au
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ËË°â˘*â⡠poetry? no, pottery!
a lilâ love between you and little lando norris đ with a twist as youâre a ceramist/potterer!
content warning; none! just enjoy the fluffs! ah, thereâs a bit of explicit language (i think?), but nothing drastic! enjoy đ˝!
summary; childhood friends reconnect after years apartâheâs a formula 1 driver, and youâre a ceramist.
Lando Norris was used to his friends teasing him. Whether it was his golfing misadventures, his love for Twitch streams, or his occasional emotional outbursts on team radio, there was always something to make him the subject of banter on and off the grid. But the one thing they had yet to figure outâsomething that he was genuinely proud ofâwas the pottery.
It started innocuously enough. A vase here, a decorative bowl there. The other drivers had assumed Lando had simply developed a newfound taste for ceramic art after moving to Monaco. Carlos had even joked once, âYouâre just trying to look posh, mate.â
But no one had noticed the small etchings at the back of each piece: a simple âLanâ with a heart. Subtle, personal, and not exactly the kind of thing youâd put on items for sale. That mystery had lingered until one fateful evening when everything unravelled in the most chaotic way imaginable.
It was post-race at Silverstone, and the whole grid had gathered for dinner at a private venue. Spirits were high after a spectacular British Grand Prix, with plenty of laughs and, naturally, plenty of friendly ribbing.
Lando sat beside Oscar, carefully monitoring his phone, knowing full well that at any moment you might call. You were in your apartment in Mexico, finalising details for an art exhibit while simultaneously working on personal pottery commissions. Lando adored how dedicated you were to your craft, even if it often left you so absorbed that you forgot thingsâlike where youâd placed your keys, or, as he was about to find out, something a little more important.
Amid the loud chatter, Landoâs phone buzzed, and your name flashed on the screen. Without thinking, he swiped to answer. âHey, love,â he greeted, but before he could say anything else, your panicked voice filled the room.
âLan, I lost my ring! I donât know where it is!â
Shoot, he forgot about the speaker.
The room fell eerily silent as the unmistakable sound of your frantic cries echoed from the speaker.
Lando froze. His brain short-circuited as he realised his phone was still on speaker. Every single driver at the tableâexcept for Oscar, Alex, and Georgeâwas staring at him like heâd just confessed to murder.
âOh, for fuââ Lando scrambled to turn off the speaker, but not before you continued, âBaby, I donât know where it is! I canât evenââ
He interrupted, voice strained with embarrassment. âHave you checked the wet clays? Thatâs usually where youâd lose it.â
The line went quiet for a second as the realisation hit you. âShit. Iâll go check. Thanks, love. Enjoy your dinner with the boys, bye!â You ended the call abruptly, leaving Lando to deal with the aftermath.
âWhat the hell was that?â Daniel was the first to break the silence, leaning forward with a grin that practically screamed mischief.
âNo, who the fuck was that?â Max followed, his bluntness cutting through the rising chaos like a hot knife through butter.
The room erupted in questions. Pierre was halfway across the table, trying to pry answers from Lando, while Charles was practically yelling over everyone else. Meanwhile, Carlos gave Lando a pointed look. âMate, donât tell me youâve got a secret girlfriend and youâve been hiding it from me?â
Landoâs cheeks burned as he fumbled to explain. âLook, itâs not a big dealââ
âNot a big deal?!â Charlesâ voice reached a pitch that only dogs could hear. âYouâve been holding out on us! Who is she?â
Amidst the chaos, Alex calmly took a sip of his drink and glanced at Charles. âYouâve met her before.â
âI have?â Charles frowned, genuinely confused.
George pulled out his phone, scrolled through his photos, and handed it over. âHere, thisâll jog your memory.â
The photo showed George, Alex, and you at a karting event years ago, laughing over slices of pizza. You were unmistakable, even with the short haircut and boyish charm you used to sport.
And the fact that you used to terrorise Charles on the grid.
Charlesâ eyes widened. âYouâre telling me that demon is Landoâsââ
âFiancĂŠe,â Lando corrected with a smug grin, cutting him off. âSheâs my fiancĂŠe.â
If the table had been chaotic before, it was nothing compared to the uproar that followed.
âFiancĂŠe?!â Charles looked moments away from fainting. Pierre had to physically restrain him from climbing over the table.
Max, ever the straight shooter, raised a brow. âHow long has this been going on?â
âSince October 2020,â Lando admitted, leaning back in his chair and crossing his arms defensively.
âYou kept this a secret for three years?â Daniel looked simultaneously impressed and horrified. âAnd all we got were vases?â
âWait,â Carlos interjected, pointing a finger at Lando. âThe potteryâdonât tell me thatâs her doing?â
Lando smirked, finally finding his footing in the conversation. âActually, most of itâs hers. But I helped with a few pieces.â
âExplains the hearts,â Pierre muttered, earning a round of laughter.
Meanwhile, back in your studio, youâd found the missing engagement ring embedded in a chunk of wet clay. You snapped a quick photo of your clay-covered hands, the ring perched delicately on your finger, and sent it to Lando with the message: Found it. Your forgetfulness is rubbing off on me.
Lando responded with a selfie of his own, a defeated look on his face, and the message: The catâs out of the bag.
You could only laugh, imagining the absolute carnage he was dealing with at dinner.
Now, the question is, how did you guys meet?
Well, letâs take a trip down memory lane, yes?
It started at a karting track in Guildford when they were both nine years old. Lando was already making waves on the circuit, a scrappy kid with untamed curls and an infectious grin. You, on the other hand, were a quiet but fiercely competitive racer, constantly being told youâd never make it because you were a girl.
That day, your paths crossed in the most clichĂŠ yet heartwarming way. Youâd crashed during qualifying and sat on the sidelines, fuming as you inspected the damaged kart. Lando, fresh off his own session, wandered over with a bag of gummy bears and an awkward grin.
âWant one?â he asked, holding the bag out to you.
You glanced up, unimpressed. âUnless it fixes my kart, no thanks.â
âIt doesnât,â he admitted, plopping one into his mouth, âbut theyâre good for sulking.â
Reluctantly, you took one. That was all it took. From that day forward, you became friendsârivals on the track, co-conspirators off it. The karting world was small, and you often found yourselves travelling the same circuits, sharing snacks, and occasionally teaming up to prank the other kids.
But all good things come to an end, and for Lando, the end came when you abruptly quit karting at twelve. One day you were there, racing alongside him, and the next, you were gone. No explanations, no goodbyesâjust a void where his fiercest rival and closest friend had been.
Years passed. Lando threw himself into racing, climbing the ranks to Formula 1, but he never stopped wondering what had happened to you. Heâd hear whispersâsomething about pottery, about you exchanging one love for anotherâbut nothing concrete.
Then, in 2020, he walked into a pop-up art gallery in London and froze. There, amidst a sea of ceramic sculptures, was a name he hadnât seen in years: yours. And standing by a display of hand-thrown vases, chatting animatedly with a small group of people, was you.
Lando hesitated, heart pounding as he watched you laugh, looking so effortlessly radiant it hurt. He was a world-famous F1 driver now, but at that moment, he felt like the same awkward boy offering gummy bears to his angry rival.
Finally, he worked up the courage to approach you. âHey,â he said, trying to sound casual. âNice vases.â
You turned, your eyes widening in surprise. For a moment, neither of you spoke. Then, as if no time had passed at all, you grinned. âNice curls.â
The conversation flowed as easily as it always had. Over coffee the next day, you explained why youâd quit karting. Your parents had pulled you out, worried about the pressure and the toxic environment you were facing as a girl in a male-dominated sport. Youâd turned to pottery as an outlet and never looked back.
âI missed it, though,â you admitted, stirring your latte. âI missed racing. I missed⌠you.â
Landoâs heart clenched. âI missed you too.â
The transition from friendship to romance was seamless, almost inevitable. But given Landoâs high-profile career, you both agreed to keep the relationship private. It wasnât easy. There were stolen weekends in Monaco, secret visits to your studio in between London and Mexico, and countless moments when you had to play it cool in public, even as your heart raced every time you saw him.
The secrecy was worth it, though. For three years, you built a world of your own, filled with laughter, late-night phone calls, and the kind of love that felt steady and enduring.
The proposal came during a quiet evening at your studio. Youâd been working on a commission, hands covered in clay, when Lando appeared in the doorway, looking unusually nervous.
âWhatâs up?â you asked, wiping your hands on a rag.
He hesitated, then held out a small, unassuming box. âI, uh, thought we could make this official.â
You stared at him, heart pounding. âLando Norris, are you asking me to marry you in the middle of my studio while Iâm covered in clay?â
He grinned, the familiar boyish charm shining through. âWell, I figured itâs where youâre happiest.â
You couldnât argue with that. Laughing, you took the box, opened it, and saw the ringâsimple, elegant, and unmistakably you. Tears filled your eyes as you nodded. âYes.â
For a while, life went on as usual. You returned to your pottery, Lando to his racing, and your engagement remained a secret known only to close family and a few trusted friends. But secrets have a way of slipping out, and yours did during that fateful post-Silverstone dinner.
By the time Lando returned home to Monaco, the internet was ablaze. Heâd soft-launched your engagement on Instagram with a series of photos: your clay-covered hands holding the ring, more of you holding your ring in defeat after possibly losing it, and a final shot of the infamous âLan âĽâ signature on one of your vases.
The caption read: ladies and gents, the chronicles of my fiancĂŠe losing her ring. she says that my forgetfulness is rubbing off on her apparently but she sadly chose to say yes to me đ.
The response was overwhelming. Fans went wild over the reveal, speculating about your relationship timeline and falling in love with the wholesome chaos of it all.
Despite the initial embarrassment, Lando wouldnât change a thing. Sure, Charles might never let him live it down, and Daniel would probably bring up the âwet clay incidentâ at every opportunity, but none of it mattered.
As he watched you work on your latest piece, the soft hum of music filling the studio, he felt a sense of peace he rarely found anywhere else. You glanced over your shoulder, catching him staring, and flashed him a smile that made his heart skip a beat.
âBack to work, Mr. Norris,â you teased, pointing at the pottery wheel.
He grinned, sliding into the seat beside you. âYes, maâam.â
If this was what forever looked like, Lando was more than ready for it.
Because in the end, every gummy bear, every secret, and every chaotic dinner had been worth it.
i hope you guys liked it 𼚠tbh, this was originally a gift for my friend to motivate her but now she wants to actually marry him⌠i take no part in that declaration.
also, this yâall man đ¤¨âđť damn, heâs okay, i guess.
iâm still very new here, so, thereâs some things i absolutely know nothing about⌠BUT, iâll get through it ŮŠ(^á^ )٠´-!! i love yâall, strangers âround the internet đ MWAH!
#f1 x reader#lando norris x reader#pottery#ceramics#x reader#i donât even know what iâm doing yall#send help#feeding your delusions with love and kindness#f1 fic#I DONT WHAT TO TAG đ
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51UT Wine
Lauren adjusted the hem of her beige blouse for the fifth time in as many minutes, glancing nervously at the clock. The table was set with her best dishes, candles flickering softly, casting a warm glow over the small dining room. She smoothed the creases on the tablecloth, ensuring that everything looked perfect.
Her reflection in the kitchen window caught her attention. Sheâd gone with a light touch of makeup, just enough to bring color to her cheeks and highlight her lips. She ran her fingers through her blonde hair, trying to fluff it up a bit. âHeâs going to notice this time,â she whispered to herself.
The sound of a car pulling into the driveway sent her heart racing. She quickly straightened the forks, adjusted the napkins, and forced herself to breathe.
The door opened, and Mike stepped in, his tie loosened, shoulders slumped. He paused when he noticed the table. âWow,â he said, setting down his briefcase. âThis isâŚnice.â
Lauren stepped out of the kitchen, her hands clasped in front of her. âHi, honey! I thoughtâŚwell, youâve been working so hard, and I just wanted to do something special for you.â Her words came out rushed, nervous.
Mike smiled faintly, his exhaustion evident. âIt looks great, Lauren. You didnât have to go to all this trouble.â
âOh, itâs no trouble!â she said quickly, her voice pitched slightly higher than usual. âI thought itâd be nice for us to, you know, sit down together. Relax. Talk.â She tucked a strand of hair behind her ear and gestured to the table. âCome on, sit down. Iâll grab the appetizer!â
Mike nodded, sliding into his chair and glancing around the table. âThis is really thoughtful,â he said as she disappeared into the kitchen.
Lauren hurried back with a plate of bruschetta, her hands trembling slightly as she placed it in the center of the table. âI know itâs simple, but itâs your favorite, right? I mean, you used to love it at that little Italian place we went to, remember? On our anniversary a few years ago?â
âYeah,â Mike said with a small smile, picking up a piece. âI remember. That was a good night.â
Lauren beamed, perching on the edge of her chair. âI thought we could recreate some of that tonight. JustâŚyou and me.â
Mike hesitated, setting down the bruschetta. âThis is really nice, Lauren. ButâŚâ He sighed, rubbing the back of his neck. âThereâs something I need to talk to you about.â
The words sent a jolt of panic through her, but she forced herself to keep smiling. âOh! Wait. Hold that thought!â she interrupted, standing abruptly. âI forgot the wine! Whatâs a fancy dinner without a bottle of wine, right?â
Mike blinked, surprised. âUh, sure.â
Lauren rushed back into the kitchen, grabbing the bottle of 51 UT Wine. Sheâd picked it up after reading rave reviews, though she hadnât tried it herself. The sleek, minimal label promised sophistication, and she hoped it would be enough to distract Mike from whatever serious topic was weighing on him.
She returned to the table, holding the bottle aloft like a prize. âTa-da! Itâs supposed to be amazing. I thought itâd be perfect for tonight.â
Mike nodded appreciatively as she poured them each a glass. âYou really went all out, huh?â
âWell,â she said, setting the bottle down and reclaiming her seat, âyouâre worth it.â She tried to steady her breathing as she watched him lift the glass to his lips. Whatever he wanted to say could wait until after theyâd had a drink.
Mike cleared his throat. âLauren, about what I was saying earlierâŚâ
Laurenâs chest tightened. She reached for her glass, gripping the stem tightly. âOh! Wait,â she blurted, her voice too chipper, âbefore we dive in, letâs toast!â
Mike blinked at her, but after a moment, he lifted his glass halfway. âSure. A toast.â
âTo us,â she said, forcing a smile, her glass meeting his with a soft clink.
Mike didnât drink, though. Instead, he set his glass back down and leaned forward, resting his elbows on the table. âLauren, I appreciate all this effort. I do. But we need to talk.â
Lauren froze, her smile faltering. âWhat is it?â
He sighed, his shoulders slumping as he searched for the right words. âThings havenât been great between us for a while now. You know that.â
Her stomach churned, but she nodded quickly, trying to get ahead of him. âOf course, I know! Thatâs why Iâm doing all of this tonight. I thought maybe we could, you know, reset orâŚfix things.â She gave a nervous laugh, her words spilling out faster than she could think them. âI mean, itâs not like I havenât noticed. Iâve definitely noticed, Mike. Thatâs why Iâve been trying toââ
He held up a hand, cutting her off gently but firmly. âLauren. Please. Let me finish.â
âOh, right. Sorry,â she said, shrinking back into her seat. To distract herself, she took a large sip of the wine. The taste surprised her, sweet and smooth, with just the faintest hint of spice. It lingered pleasantly on her tongue, and for a moment, she forgot her nerves.
Mike didnât touch his glass. He pressed on. âIâve been thinking a lot aboutâŚus. Our relationship. And I keep coming back to the same thing: weâre not close anymore. Not like we used to be.â He hesitated, his gaze darting to hers before quickly dropping to the table. âWe barely talk. We donâtâŚconnect. And our sex lifeâŚitâs nonexistent.â
Laurenâs face burned, and she looked down at her lap. âI know,â she whispered. âI know itâs beenâŚâ
âIâm not done,â Mike interrupted, his tone soft but insistent. âThis distance between usâitâs been weighing on me, Lauren. And latelyâŚâ He trailed off, swallowing hard. âLately, Iâve started noticing other women.â
Her head snapped up, her eyes widening in shock.
âI havenât cheated,â he said quickly, holding up his hands. âI wouldnât do that. But the fact that Iâm evenâŚnoticing them, that Iâm thinking about what it would be likeâŚthatâs not a good sign.â
Her heart sank, even as her hands tightened around the wine glass. She forced herself to take another sip, letting the warm liquid soothe her frayed nerves. âNoticing other women,â she repeated faintly, her mind reeling.
Mike leaned back in his chair, his expression pained. âIâm not saying this to hurt you. I justâŚI think weâre at a crossroads. Iâve been wondering if weâre better off going our separate ways.â
The word hung in the air like a storm cloud: divorce.
Lauren set her empty glass down and immediately reached for the bottle, refilling it with shaky hands. âI meanâŚwow. Okay. ThatâsâŚa lot.â She let out a nervous laugh, her words tumbling out faster than ever. âI mean, I knew things were bad, obviously. Iâm not blind. But divorce? Thatâsâwow. Thatâs big. Really big. Not that Iâm saying youâre wrong to feel that way, because obviously, you have a right to your feelings, and I totally get it. I do.â She took a deep breath and forced a smile that didnât reach her eyes.
Mike opened his mouth to respond, but she was already talking again.
âBut, you know, thatâs why I did this tonight! I mean, look at this table! Look at this food! I wanted to show you that I care, that Iâm trying.â She paused only to take another gulp of wine, barely noticing the beads of sweat forming at the nape of her neck. âI thought maybe if we just spent some time together, we could, I donât know, reconnect or something. Because I donât want to give up on us, Mike. I really donât.â
Mike exhaled, looking down at his hands, which were clasped together on the table. His brow was furrowed as if the words were physically hard to pull out. âIâve been carrying this around for a while, Lauren. I didnât want to bring it up like this, but⌠Iâve been feeling lost. Like weâre just⌠going through the motions. Itâs like weâre roommates, not a married couple. And thatâs been killing me. I donât know how to fix it.â
Laurenâs lips parted to respond, but she couldnât form the words. Her mind was a jumbled, overheated mess. The warmth that had started in her belly had spread through her entire body now, making her feel flushed, shaky, hot.
She shifted in her seat, crossing and uncrossing her legs, trying to ease the strange ache growing between her thighs. Her nipples had hardened into stiff peaks, pressing insistently against the thin fabric of her blouse. God, why does this feel so good?
Mike looked up at her, his expression pained. âIâm not saying this is all your fault, Lauren. I know I havenât been perfect. Iâve been distracted with work, butâŚâ
Laurenâs heart sank at the words, but not for the reasons she expected. Heâs right. I have been distant.Â
She leaned forward slightly, the movement making her all too aware of the slick heat between her legs. She took a shaky breath, her voice barely above a whisper. âI know Iâve been distant, Mike. I know.â
âIâve been so stuck in my own head. Stuck in this rut. I didnât mean to push you away, but I did. And youâre right, weâve been so far apart. But I donât want to be.â
Mike blinked, surprised by the sudden vulnerability in her voice.
âI donât want us to fall apart,â she said, her voice rising slightly, as if she were pleading with him to believe her. âI donât want to lose you. And I know Iâve made it hard, but, MikeâŚâÂ
Laurenâs words poured out in a rush, the desperation in her voice growing thicker. âI donât want to waste another second, Mike. I canâtâŚâ
She stopped mid-sentence, her breath hitching. A soft, involuntary moan escaped her lips, catching them both by surprise. Her knees buckled slightly under the table, her thighs clamping together as a jolt of pleasure coursed through her body. âOhâŚoh my godâŚâ
Mike froze, his concern deepening. âLauren? Whatâs wrong? Are you okay?â
Lauren opened her mouth to answer, but the words didnât come out right. Instead, her voice wavered, raw and sultry. âI-I feelâŚsoââ Her hands gripped the edge of the table, her body trembling. A louder moan tore through her, startling even herself. âOhhhâŚoh, MikeâŚsomethingâs happening!â
Her chest heaved as wave after wave of sensation rolled through her. Her skin was on fire. She felt her nipples stiffen even more, pressing painfully against her blouse. Her thighs quivered as her pussy throbbed.
âIâŚI canât stop it,â she whimpered, her voice cracking as another moan escaped, louder this time. Her head tipped back, her blonde hair falling over her shoulders as her body arched involuntarily. âItâsâŚit feels so good. Oh god, itâs so good.â
Mike stood from his chair, his concern battling with the undeniable arousal growing in him. He couldnât take his eyes off herâŚher flushed cheeks, the way her body writhed, the glisten of sweat on her skin. âLauren, talk to me,â he said, though his voice wavered. âWhatâs happening to you?â
Lauren doubled over suddenly, clutching her stomach as her moans turned into something almost guttural. Her back arched again, her fingers clawed at the table, her legs pressing together as if to contain the overwhelming sensations. âOhhh, MikeâŚIâŚI canâtâŚohhh!â
And then it hit her.
Her body tensed, every muscle locking as she let out a high-pitched cry, trembling violently. The orgasm tore through her, leaving her gasping and shuddering as she collapsed onto the floor.
âLauren!â Mikeâs chair scraped back loudly as he rushed around the table to her side.
She lay there on her back, panting heavily, her eyes fluttering open and closed. âMikeâŚIâŚâ she started, but her words cut off with a gasp as her body began to shift before his eyes.
Mike knelt beside her, his heart racing as he watched. Her legs, slender and pale, began to lengthen, her thighs thickening into firm, toned curves. Her hips arched upward, widening slightly, her waist slimming even further into an exaggerated hourglass shape.Â
Mike couldnât look away as her chest rose and swelled, her flat chest filling out until her blouse strained against the growing fullness of her breasts.
Even her face changed, her features softening, her lips plumping into a full, glossy pout that begged to be kissed. Her hair darkened to a rich honey brown, cascading down her back.
And her clothesâoh god, her clothesâshifted along with her body. The plain beige blouse and pants melted away. A striped button-up shirt hung loosely from her shoulders, the top buttons undone to reveal a lacy lavender bra that barely contained her newfound curves. The matching panties hugged her hips perfectly, the dark lace accentuating every inch of her.
Mike took it all in. His wife, his Lauren, looked like someone else entirely. She was stunning, raw sexuality.
Laurenâs eyes fluttered open, and she let out a soft, breathless moan as she slowly sat up. Her gaze locked onto Mikeâs, and a sly, predatory smile spread across her lips. âMike,â she purred, her voice like velvet. âWhatâs the matter? Donât you recognize me?â
Mike stared at her, completely stunned, his heart pounding in his chest.Â
Lauren slowly pushed herself to her feet, like a predator stalking its prey. Her lips parted into a sultry grin as she looked at Mike.Â
She reached for him, her nails lightly grazing his shirt as she leaned in close, her breath hot against his ear. âMike,â she purred, her voice dripping with need. âWhy are you just staring? Donât you want to touch me?â
Mike swallowed hard, his throat dry as he struggled to form words. âL-Lauren, I⌠I donât understand whatâs going on. Are youâŚfeeling okay?â
She let out a soft, throaty laugh, her fingers trailing down his chest. âOh, I feel better than okay. I feel incredible.â Her hips swayed as she stepped even closer, her body pressed against his. âAnd youâre going to feel incredible too, if you stop talking and start fucking me.â
âLauren, wait,â Mike stammered, taking a step back, though his eyes couldnât leave hers, or her body.Â
Her hands moved to his belt, her nails grazing the leather as she tugged him closer. âIâve been a good little wife for so long, havenât I? Cooking, cleaning, keeping my legs crossed while you barely looked at me. But not anymore.â She licked her lips, her gaze locking onto his like a magnet. âI want you to give me everything youâve got.â
Mikeâs hands hovered near her arms, torn between pulling her closer and pushing her away.Â
âI donât care about being proper, or polite, or whatever the fuck we were doing before.â Her hands slid up his chest, over his shoulders, pulling him down until her lips were millimeters from his. âAll I care about is feeling you inside me. Right here. Right now.â
Mikeâs resolve cracked, his breath catching as her hips pressed firmly against his, grinding ever so slightly. He could feel the heat radiating off her, and his body betrayed him.
Lauren smirked, noticing his reaction. âThatâs more like it,â she murmured, her voice low and teasing. âI can feel how much you want me, Mike. So stop pretending youâre in control, and let me show you what Iâve been dying for.â
She grabbed his hand and guided it down to her waist, pressing his palm against her panties. She leaned into his ear, her voice dropping to a whisper. âDo you feel that? How hot I am for you? How wet?â
Lauren reached for the wine bottle, her movements unhurried and deliberate. She poured herself a fresh glass, her fingers tracing the rim as she swirled the dark liquid. She took a slow sip, her gaze locked on Mikeâs, her lips parting slightly as she savored the taste.
Mikeâs face burned, his heart hammering in his chest. âLauren, this isâŚâ
âExactly what we both need,â she said, cutting him off again. Her hands trailed down his arms, her nails lightly raking his skin as she leaned back. âSo stop talking and start doing what we both know you want to do.â
She reached behind herself, unclasping the bra with one smooth motion. It fell to the floor, and she stood before him, her chest bare.
âCome on,â she said, her voice a seductive purr. She turned away from him, taking the wine glass in one hand as she began to walk towards the bedroom, her hips swaying with exaggerated purpose.
âLaurenâŚâ he started, his voice hoarse, but he didnât know what to say.
She glanced over her shoulder, her expression one of unrestrained hunger. âAre you coming, Mike?â
Mikeâs body moved before his brain could catch up. He followed her, watching her fall onto the bed, splashing wine over her naked breasts. Her lips curved into a wicked smile as she licked the wine off her nipple.
âNow,â she said, her tone both commanding and pleading, âare you going to fuck me like Iâve been begging for? Or do I need to get on my knees and convince you?â
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Okay, but how about an angsty thanksgiving intervention? They have a friendsgiving thingy a couple of days before or after the actual holiday at the Madney house. I imagine Maddie, Chim, Hen, Karen, all their kids and Buck are there. Eddie is in El Paso for the holiday and Bobby and Athena are busy with something else, idk. (I feel like having Bobby there would prevent a lot of the drama, so for reasons he can't be there.)
But Chimney (with Maddie's approval) also invites Tommy - except Tommy doesn't know this is a family event [tm], he thinks Chim just invited him over to hang out. Drink some beer, watch a movie maybe.
And Tommy thinks: "I should probably go, Howie's been my friend for almost 20 years now. I can handle hanging out with an old friend for a night, even if he happens to me ex's brother-in-law. It'll be good for me." But he's completely and utterly unprepared and not ready to run into Buck again so soon, much less in a context that oh so loudly screams "family" and thus represents everything Tommy always wanted and never had. It's an ocean's worth of salt in a fresh wound.
Buck on the other hand doesn't know Tommy's coming to the friendsgiving either. He just prepared a shit ton of food and figured spending time with his family will be a good distraction from the break-up. He hasn't hung out with Hen and Karen in a while and he's looking forward to having all the kids around. Who can mope about a stupid ex when the noise is drowned out by giggling and laughing children running around?
Chim and Maddie hoped that their plan might help Buck and Tommy to at least find some closure or maybe even get them talking to each other again. Either way, at least everyone gets a good, home-cooked meal and some quality time with friends out of it, right?
But then they're suddenly and unexpectedly confronted with each other when neither of them is ready. Buck has barely begun to even process the break-up. Let's be honest, the baking thing has been more of a distraction from thinking about Tommy than a coping mechanism to work through his feelings. He's still a little bit in denial and Tommy crashing his safe-space catapults him into the anger/depression stage.
Tommy could've dealt with a movie night with Chim, could've even coped with having Maddie and Jee-Yun there, but an entire ass family holiday? Avoiding eye contact, forcing smiles, faking normal for hours while pretending he isn't still putting the pieces of his own heart back together? Knowing he will go home alone with the fresh reminder of what he will never truly have and get to keep?
So Tommy awkwardly excuses himself and maybe Buck throws in a bitter: "Yeah, leave. You're good at that." And maybe in an attempt to de-escalate - or at least move the escalation out of earshot from the kids - Maddie suggests they talk outside. But outside they just stare at each other, not knowing what to say. Tommy apologises again, saying he'll just leave and let Buck enjoy the evening.
"It's fine", Buck says: "I think I'll leave too, actually." And Tommy lays into him about how he shouldn't spend the holiday alone when he can just go back inside and be with his family, he shouldn't be sitting in his empty loft when he could play with Jee-Yun or catch up with Karen instead.
Buck finally gets angry about what happened, but he hasn't put his thoughts in order yet, can't put into words what he feels yet. He also feels ambushed and a wee bit manipulated. So he just bites out: "Oh right, I forgot. You're the expert on what I should and shouldn't be doing. God forbid I decide for myself what I want", walks over to his car and drives off.
Tommy sits in his car for a little bit, then he goes home too. Maddie and Chimney feel bad. After they tried to encourage Buck to move on a bit too soon, they overcorrected in the opposite direction and it blew up in their faces. Maddie tries to call Buck, but he's turned off his phone. Chimney tries to reach out to Tommy, but his text sits there delivered, unread and stays unanswered.
Tommy ends up sitting on his couch, crying and staring at the tv which he hasn't even bothered to turn on and Buck spends hours pacing in his kitchen, alternating between wanting to yell at Tommy for breaking up with him in the first place and deleting his number so he'll never even be tempted to talk to him again.
So they all end up spending the friendsgiving evening in varying degrees of misery.
(Maddie, Chimney and Buck patch things up almost immediately. They bring him breakfast the next morning and apologise for springing this on him without warning. He accepts the apology, he knows they meant well and it was actually a nice thing that they tried to include Tommy despite the break-up. He wants Tommy to be happy. Really, he wants Tommy to find whatever he thinks Buck couldn't give him. He hopes Tommy one day finds a man who won't make him run the opposite direction. He wants Tommy to feel good about himself and to have a life full of friends and family and people who he can call his. Eventually. Right now, he admits, he selfishly wants Tommy to feel a bit shit. He hopes Tommy is hurting at least as much as he is. He hopes Tommy's favourite basketball team loses every game of the season. He hopes one of Tommy's coworkers says the q-word and jinxes them for a full 24 hours shift. Buck doesn't know when he started crying, but Chim and Maddie are there for him and they spend most of the day together.)
(Chimney also apologises to Tommy. They don't really talk about it, Tommy doesn't want to. He'd rather listen to Howie gush about becoming a dad again, talk about the next pick-up game and ignore the elephant in the room. It's easy to slip back into the casual friendship, the conversations that are full of movie dialogues and references, the bragging and comparing of batshit calls they've worked in the past 20 years. They don't hang out at Howie's house, they either go to Tommy's or meet at a bar. But Tommy is relieved he at least got to keep this.)
(Buck and Tommy run into each other again a few weeks later. It's the second christmas day, Buck is invited to hang out with the Diaz family. Christopher has agreed to come to LA for a week - a trial run of sorts to help him and Eddie figure out what comes next - and they're all going to spend the day at tĂa Pepa's. Buck is picking up some groceries on his way there and who does he meet in the canned foods isle? Buck doesn't really know what comes over him, but he suggest they should hang out together while Chris and Eddie are here. All four of them. Eddie was Tommy's friend before they ever went out after all and so was Chimney. Plus, they're all firefighters. They're bound to run into each other again sooner or later, it'd be childish to be hung up on the past. Tommy says yes.)
(They start talking to each other more after that. Not very often, not consistently, not about their break-up. But they talk. It starts with texting and hanging out in group settings. Then the phone calls start. At first just small ones, "it'll be quicker than texting" calls, "I'm ellbows deep in foccacia dough" and "broke my hand on call yesterday, so quite literally can't text" calls. Then they start hanging out one on one again. Neither of them has ever stayed friends with an ex before. Is it supposed to feel like this? Is Tommy's laugh still supposed to make Buck's heart skip a beat like this? Is Evan's soft smile still supposed to melt Tommy's insides like this?)
(They get back together in March. It's not preceded by a big and dramatic event. There's no "life or death" situation, no traumatic incident to make them realise that "tomorrow isn't promised, no awkward jealousy over a new partner. It's just another movie nigh. Buck falls asleep with his head on Tommy's shoulder and Tommy doesn't even think about it before running his fingers through Evan's curls. Buck wakes up as the credits start rolling. He shifts a little, looks up at Tommy, but he doesn't move away. The kiss is soft and chaste and they leave it at that one kiss. Buck doesn't move to the bedroom with Tommy, but he does crash on Tommy's couch. They talk in the morning. They talk about being all in but taking it slow anyway, they talk about crushes and admiration and love and the difference between all three, they finally talk about the break-up. They keep it a secret for a little while. Call it precaution or payback for Chimney's attempt at meddling.)
(They make it three weeks. Then Tommy surprises Buck at his loft and they forget that not only was Eddie supposed to come over, Eddie also has his own key. They never live it down for as long as they're alive.)
#ah yes angst#I'm afraid the author (me) misunderstood the assignment because uh. yeah#that ending doesn't scream âangstâ#oh well#angst with a happy ending?#bucktommy#evan buckley#tommy kinard#911 abc#fic idea#might turn this into a fic later actually#unless any of y'all wanna do it#long post
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đ PROMPTS ⸝ MERRY MELJAY DECEMBER 2024!
Here are the prompts for the month of December. Feel free to switch any of the days with one another. We are looking forward to seeing you in the tag on December 1st!
Interested in participating? Check out the FAQ under the cut!
How does Meljay Microfics work?
Weâll release a monthly prompt list to inspire you! Each microfic must feature Mel Medarda & Jayce Talis from Arcane. Meljay can be platonic friends, lovers, enemies, or whatever dynamic you are inclined to write them in. The microfic must be Meljay-centric to be featured on this blog.
How long can the microfics be?
We invite you to write a work of fiction with a wordcount under 1k. Therefore, your work should be a standalone, meant to be read without having to read a larger work so that readers can enjoy it to the fullest.
What should the fic be about?Â
Whatever you want! Canon or AU, crack or general use the prompt however you see fit. Any genre is accepted! You can combine prompts, if youâd like. How you use the prompt is up to your interpretation! Let your muse move you.
You donât have to write for every prompt of the month. Thereâs no pressure here, no commitment. This is just for fun.Â
There are no stipulations on ratings, just be sure to add appropriate tags & content warnings to the top of post. If there is NSFW or sensitive topics in your piece, be sure to place it under a read more.
How do I get my work featured?
If you participate, weâd love to see your work! Tag us @meljaymicrofics & tag your work with #meljaymicrofics, and weâll reblog your fic! Be sure to include the prompt word you were inspired by within the post!
Thereâs also an AO3 COLLECTION that you can post your microfics to if interested.
Can I submit a prompt?
Yes! Feel free to send it in, and weâll include it in the next monthâs list if we can.
Do you allow AI works?
AI works are prohibited and will not be reblogged onto the blog or accepted within the collection. We value your creativity here.
What if I have a question/suggestion.
Feel free to drop an ask!
#mel medarda#jayce talis#meljay#meljaymicrofics#onlymeljay#goldenforge#mel x jayce#jaycemel#jaymel#arcane jayce#jayce x mel#arcane microfic#arcane#arcane mel#prompt list#microfics#meljaymicrofic
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taking requests, angel? if so...
I saw some Kathryn gifs and an idea came to me: Agatha, after a long and exhausted working week, asks female reader to have a date, but the date is on their house because Agatha is too tired to go out. Reader is happy, tho, because her love language is quality time and physical contact. Something like a dinner, maybe, idk... so they end up having a very lovely time together, cuddling on the sofa until they fall asleep. Smut or not in the end, it's up to you... but I'd love to read something cute from you:( I don't know if that's okay...
if you're not taking requests, I totally understand that! I don't want to bother you.
- đ
Fun fact, this is my first time writing something that's not meant to build up to sexy times! Also the fluffiest thing I've ever written so hopefully it's good!
Home is where the heart is
A change of plans in your date night with Agatha leads to a confession.
Word count: 1200
Warnings: fluff, softness
Still on for dinner and a movie tonight?Â
Itâs the text you sent your girlfriend, Agatha, an hour ago and she still hasnât responded. This usually isnât like her, but you know how busy work can get. And you know how tough the last week had been on her, but you were really looking forward to spending this Friday night with her.Â
The two of you had been dating for three months now and it always seemed like the older woman wanted to do something, whether it be going to a nice restaurant or mini-golfing or painting pottery. Like tonight, Agatha is supposed to take you to the newest spot in town that just opened up and then you were going to see Corpse Bride as it was playing again in theaters.Â
You would never complain about any of this, but youâre a little worried that Agatha thinks that you need all of this to hang out with her.Â
A text from Agatha buzzes finally. Doll, Iâm so sorry. You frown and pick your phone up, afraid sheâs going to cancel. Iâm so exhausted from work, how would you feel just coming over tonight for something chill? I can order pizza.Â
You breathe a sigh of relief and type back. I would love that! See you later. You almost finish the text with a âLove youâ but neither of you had said it yet and you were sure as hell not going to say it over the phone for the first time.Â
You also werenât sure how Agatha felt. She was older and you werenât exactly sure what she saw in you. She was beautiful and confident and wealthy and could have anyone she wanted, and yet she chose you.Â
A part of you deep down is perturbed that this is just a fling for her. It would crush you if thatâs what it was.Â
But you bury that insecurity somewhere dark inside you and you get ready for date night.Â
Since youâre not doing anything special, you opt for a comfy purple sweater and black leggings. You do put on lacy underwear just in case Agathaâs in the mood, but you are totally content if not.Â
You just want to spend time with your girlfriend.Â
You get to her house right at six, which was when you were supposed to meet anyway, and you only have to wait a second after ringing the doorbell for Agatha to appear.Â
âHey, baby,â she says, stepping to the side so you can enter. Sheâs wearing sweatpants and a tank top, hair loose, but sheâs never looked more beautiful. You press a cheek to her kiss and she hums happily and follows you into the kitchen. âSorry to cancel our plans at the last minute, Iâm just so tired.âÂ
âNo worries at all,â you reassure her, opening the pizza box thatâs already on the counter. Itâs your favorite kind and you put two pieces on a plate and grab a beer. She does the same and leads you over to the couch where you sit on opposite sides facing each other. âEverything okay?â You ask once youâre both settled.Â
She sighs dramatically and her head flops back against the couch. You laugh and nudge her with your foot.Â
Agatha looks back at you, mirth sparkling in her eyes. âIt was just a rough week, hon. Lots of people bothering me, asking stupid questions they should know the answers to, following up on emails that they havenât responded to. And I had to work late those couple nights.â
You frown. âIâm sorry. You work so hard and no one seems to give you the credit you deserve.â You take a bite of your pizza and chew it thoughtfully, wondering what else you can say. You know sheâs been really busy and youâve hardly seen her at all this week.Â
But she leans forward and pats your thigh. âBut this has certainly helped.âÂ
You raise an eyebrow. âThe pizza and beer?â You ask innocently, fishing for more. She rolls her eyes fondly, knowing how much validation you like.Â
âAnd the company, hon. Youâre pretty great, you know?âÂ
You smile and squirm with contentment. âYou are too, Aggie. Iâm always happy to just sit on your couch and talk. I just want to spend time with you, no matter what weâre doing.âÂ
She smiles gratefully. âMe too, baby. Now, how has your week been?â You launch into an animated retelling of something that happened at work and she hangs onto every word. It takes you a bit longer to tell the story in-between bites of your pizza, but her attention never wavers.Â
It makes you feel so warm inside how Agatha always pays attention to what youâre saying. She makes you feel so seen and you couldnât be more lucky to have her.Â
Once youâre done talking and with the pizza, she puts on an episode of Modern Family, your comfort show. You lay between her legs, your back to her front, while she gently strokes your hair. You trace lazy circles on her thighs through her sweatpants and itâs absolutely perfect.Â
She tilts your head to the side and angles hers so sheâs able to kiss you softly. Itâs just a press of her lips against yours at first, but it slowly becomes more and your mouth parts for her tongue.Â
Itâs not a needy kiss though, not a kiss meant to lead to something more, itâs a kiss full of adoration and longing and intimacy.Â
âYouâre so perfect, baby,â Agatha murmurs against your lips.
âNot as perfect as you,â you say back and you can feel her smile against your skin.Â
She lets you go back to the show and wraps her arms around you. You can feel her deep breathing and you feel so safe and warm that you start to doze off.Â
Right before sleep takes you though, you feel her nuzzle your temple and whisper into your ear: âI love you, baby.âÂ
Your heart leaps and you suddenly feel more awake than ever. You whirl around so fast that you almost fall off the couch. Agathaâs eyes are wide and you think you see fear in them.Â
âDid you justââ You start.Â
At the same time, Agatha says, âIâm so sorryââ
You both cut off at the same time. You smile wider than you ever have before and you move so youâre straddling her lap. You put your arms around her neck and rest your forehead against hers.Â
âAgatha Harkness,â you say. Her eyebrows raise. âI love you, too.âÂ
She closes the distance between you and kisses you again, this time with more passion. You whine and try to pull her as close as you can, needing to feel her body against yours as much as you can.Â
âSay it again,â she says and you smirk.Â
âI-â You kiss her. âLove.â Another kiss. âYou.â She grins and gives you a long kiss and it eventually sizzles out and the two of you are just holding each other, your chin on top of her shoulder.Â
âIâm so glad I cancelled our other date,â Agatha muses and you chuckle, squeezing her tighter. âStay here with me forever, love?âÂ
You promise that you will.Â
And when you both wake up in the morning in that same position, she tells you that she loves you again.
You hope she never stops saying it, because you know that you never will.
#agatha harkness x fem!reader#agatha harkness x reader#agatha x reader#agatha x you#agatha harkness x you#kathryn hahn x reader#agatha all along
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GLOW prompts: Jewel
@storyknitter's gorgeous Sanna and Theron, medieval fantasy au edition.
#swtor#swtor ocs#mirialan#theron shan#swtor au#mf!au sanna and theron#other people's ocs#glow prompts#glow#jewel#dingoat does art#yeah I've been a bit slow lately x.x#this summer has... done me in a bit#but I'm still in love with these prompts#and looking forward to each piece I have to work on!
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litany of the martyrs (click for better resolution!)
#at some point i wanted to make an illustration for each character but in retrospect maybe each is multiple song-coded..#drew the sketch for a quincy thing after a chat with a mutual reminded me this song existed dfsghjkl and then spent weeks rendering this#quincy cynthius martin#adamandi#i'm finally done with this! the saints especially were joys to paint and the halo a menace.... this has been the most ambitious one so far.#but it also took quite long because i only worked on it <engages with quincy> when mentally okay to deal with the themes. i'm not religious#but i do identify with the irrational(?ish) guilt + family legacy + academic achievement + disregard for self. also more complex thoughts#about love [but depsite quincent being a large part of quincy's character this piece deals with mostly the Rest of it. so another time..]#anyways! in the original sketch- the saints had heads bent towards quincy so the halo spikes pointed at him. but this worked better! halos#of the saints implying/creating one for quincy was a concept from the start though. in the show they don't touch him directly here but#differences in mediums i think- i don't have time in an image to craft a narrative so everything has to be happening. also artistic liberty#misc inspiration for this includes stained glass windows. i might have maybe misinterpreted the saint costume but i think i logic-ed it out#as the cloth part following a nun's habit w the hood. and then halo above. the material is also more transparent originally but i had. um.#too much fun painting fabric folds.. if you look closely you can see the basis of faces though behind the cloth; but only the vague shapes#because smth obscurity + inhumanness// cassian is the only one i gave a mouth though. that stems from melliot's post about the saints and#st cassian as spokesperson (<- did research teehee!) that's also how i found out which costume = which saint. speaking of which.#left to right: 'st lucy take my hand' // 'st lawrence give me strength' (presses quincy forward; but hand on shoulder connotates guidance)#/'st cassian help me smile' (quincy's mouth is btwn a grimace and a smile; tilts up at side. also no direct touch bc added insidiousness.)#//'st jude [...] i hope your causes burn' (jude's hand is in two places to show movement- nearing the flame and then snatching back; burnt)#other notes: at the midst of the flame the core is shaped like a human heart /the saints and their wax are all melting like the candle for#fun visual effect and also this way they are even less tangible <real>. perks of painting as a medium i guess. // also insp from icarus?#wax and burning imagery; looking at the halo and rays as parallel to sun that burns. too close to the sun; melting; hurting; hurtling //#candles at bottom are a nod to the frankly gorgeous set// also the entire composition kind of stems from the lyric <what use is a candle if#both ends aren't burning>; the two sides between the concepts of catholic guilt and academic perfection that spur quincy#the halo above (saints and guilt; litanyofthemartyrs) and the 'halo' below (academic papers; insp from choreo for perfect at school)#the papers were originally supposed to be more glowy. but i like the idea of it now being a reflection of how quincy's priorities shift#also of note is that <candle> in centre = quincy; w burning candle + aforementioned heart in flame -> most human; idea of love + passion#last thoughts: kneeling + hands close tgt = prayer //wax dripping onto the red As make an effect that looks like blood. because i like#hiding that within the adamandi pieces :OO continuity!! // i've run out of tags but yeah! had fun with this one! every so often i go a#little insane in making art and the final result astounds even me. ngl i'm quite proud of this one. pretty colours <3333
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double trouble
#detroit become human#rk1700#the boys....baby boys....woobies...#listen i just think nines would have such an overprotective streak for connor..#he protecc and he want to attacc. connor will teach him well#my favourite headcanon is nines quietly admiring the hell out of connor and learning from him and his mistakes as well#choosing the most optimal way to exist within society. hes so impressed with connor who is bumbling terribly but doing his best#connor has the experience and higher social relations but nines is much quicker to catch on#they both admire each other and are pushed forward by each others existance and improvement#ive seen a few fanfics where they have that dynamic and its my favourite#they work so sweetly in a brotherly bond it warms my heart (though i am a shameless rk1700 enjoyer)#anyway thats enough rambling#i wish there was a dbh fandom still#im just throwing up doodles now with no thought of making any solid pieces yet#my art#dbh#rk900#connor detroit become human#also i know theres zero consistency with the art style and keeping them looking the same but fuck that i dont have the patience rn#also also lmao i just noticed but the top one looks like hes trying to kiss connor but no that was a continuation of bottom left sjdjfjdj#feel free to interpret it any way yoy want hajdjfjfjd
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okay, I don't want this guy to just entirely vanish into the aether so I'm posting ONE photo at the most flattering angle I can find, but.... man đ I worked on this for so long and struggled so much and every change and tweak I made hoping to improve the shape just made me less satisfied. There are individual things I'm happy with, like figuring out how to "squint" the eyes and the overall weight and flop of the body, but I feel like I need to revisit the pattern and make some pretty dramatic changes. I may have to accept that I need to break it up into more than like... ten major pieces đŽâđ¨
#idk if this sounds insane but i feel like this one never quite ''came alive'' the whole time i was working on it#holding it doesn't make me Feel anything except frustration skdhsj#so I'm probably gonna take it apart to reclaim the pellets and face pieces for the next attempt :|#artbyrom#the little creature coterie#on the plus side i DID go ahead and order thr Good Fur#i got 1'' and 1/2'' pile in a nice ~ivory~ white so it's got a warm creamy tint to it#and i got a whole yard of each so i will have enough for experiments and I'm looking forward to it :3
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finally captured one of my favs
#story time: ppl cover each other on this wall constantly. especially lately#nd at one point there was this BEAUTIFUL gradient transtifa tag. i had been meaning to get pics of it for like a couple weeks#then someone covered it w/ a pretty weak throwie. ive seen it happening a lot recently especially on my fav spots#beautiful work gets covered w/ some toy shit which like. yeah name of the game but its annoying when its ugly shit covering good tags#ANYWAYS maybe like a week or 2 later this big beautiful beast covers ALL OF IT. fuck yeah queer artists and art perservering#huge fan of this tagger tho. theyre local and apparently a friend of a friend? big inspo#snapped a couple more of theirs over the weekend im gonna be posting soon. have a very cool train bridge piece im looking forward to sharin#roach snaps#graff#graffiti#grafflife#roach.zip
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New Adventurer Portraits Letâs Goooooo!
This is my main, Satou Saothru, my first FFXIV character and the most played, with the perfect green and yellow hair that I remain obsessed with.
Adventurer plate and my warrior images were carried over so they are the same, but all of the new quick portraits are under the cut!
Disciples of War and Magic:
I have not picked up Sage yet.
Disciples of the Land:
Disciples of the Hand:
Other glamour oriented gearsets:
I tried to make dynamic portraits that captured some movement. Iâm pleased with how little repetition there was in poses, even with the DoL and DoH sharing some poses with paladins.Â
I had a lot of fun making these and look forward to seeing other playerâs portraits!
#ffxiv#lalafell#I feel like that red mage portrait is one of the best things I've made ever#and just with a set of controlled image pieces xD#astro bard dark knight and red mage are the main classes I play so it is no wonder that I particularly like those portraits#clearly I used the battle stance and victory poses a lot#they have unique animations for disciples of war and magic so there is a lot to work with there#and lalafells have such cute cheer happy and joy animations#of course weaver has to be extra with the drama and suffering#when in general I tried to not overdo it with the backgrounds and borders because I feel like a lot of the options can pull attention away#from the warrior of light themselves#I used different portions of the Bees Knees for the weaver and fashion report sets but they look almost exactly the same >.<#Paladin and goldsmith are the same pose#as are botanist and alchemist#with the different weapons or tools making a difference in how the images look#and again the whole thing with disciples of the hand and land using paladin animations#Paladin and Reaper look similar by coincidence as I pulled the poses from animations unique to each of them#I hope that some of y'all enjoy these#and look forward to seeing other WoL's portraits#satou says
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IDK what exactly went down with the meeting with my supervisor and her boss today re: the fact my position doesnât exist but Iâm feeling... good? Very weird about it though.
Bossman once again brought up the possibility of me being the backup for his position, if I could get past not liking to speak in front of crowds or give presentations.
I am once again being tasked with training people in âhigherâ positions than me (bc my position title has not changed since I got hired in four years ago even though I know more than *cough*everyone*cough* a few people) but this time I was given actual pointers!!!! Bc I super suck at people skills of the professional level.
The more that Iâve been thinking about the meeting the more Iâm actually kind of looking forward to doing the training. The hardest part (outside of the soon-to-be wildly changing work schedule) is that Iâm gonna have to keep my bitchiness under control lmaoooo
But also like. My schedule is changing and i donât fuckin know how itâs gonna work- and my boss even. Made a comment that is just now starting to sink in that I might not be able to come back to her shift after training is complete.
âWhen your schedule changes, I donât know if youâll be under me or [Bossman] so just make sure you inform both of us of your hour changes until itâs figured out.â
If I end up being transferred directly under Bossman, going back to my Sup is essentially impossible and like--- sheâs the reason I bothered staying at this place as long as I have. If it werenât for her, Iâdâve quit two years ago. Itâd be a massive step forward for me in the company, sure, and I would be better off when it came to my salary but itâs sad to think that I might not be answering to her anymore;;;;
#arkayl rambles#she lets me bitch about anything and everything during work hours#she... lets me DO anything too??? my position doesnt exist and she's chill with me doing whatever as long as I'm working y'know#I pick my break times and I'm not in trouble if I take a lil extra time#she let me use headphones which are prohibited where I work once when I was super stressed out#anyways if things go smoothly and don't break down when I start getting my footing#I'm actually looking forward to being one of the pieces that might actually make my department one team#instead of a bunch of smaller teams fighting each other#uhhhh#long post#i guess? it is just work rambling I'm sorry guys lmao i have too many thoughts in my brain rn#OH THIS FEELS LIKE THE BEGINNING OF A GRADUATION TERM THATS WHAT THIS WEIRD FEELING IS OHHHH IDK IF I DIG THIS
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kill me now
#I am not looking forward to doing the gray tubes#the gray tubes are such a pain in the ass#ugh#voxel art#1984 adaptation#set design#taking a break and then gonna add the cameras to the tops of each one#This set is so overstimulating to look at good god#Itâs horrible#I love how my director friendâs posts about his work are all âSo excited to be on set with everyone! Dig these pictures:â#and all my posts about my work are just âI hate animating I hate myself I hate everything#and immediately upon finishing this piece of shit I will channel my inner Gunne Sax and hang myself in the closetâ#And the hilarious thing is that I somehow have the healthiest work ethic between the two of us#The difference between live action and animated production lmfao#Sitting in front of a screen overstimulating yourself agonizing over a characterâs right foot for years will do that to you
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𣲠RILE HIM UP ! ft BOOTHILL.
â â your least favourite cyborg is brought back to you a mangled mess.
â OR
â â being boothillâs mechanic when you lowkey canât stand each other.
â ď¸ sweet sweet tension, a little suggestive towards the end, gn reader (no referring pronouns), can they fuck already, this was ib by his lightcone, wc 1.9k
boothill's eyes flickered to life, emitting a faint glow of red as his systems began to reboot.
a pair of familiar red pupils met yours, two crosshairs fading into sight as boothill regained his sight andâ to your dismayâ consciousness.
as the cyborg regained his motion he attempted a step forward, only to realise he didnât have the feet or legs to do so. the only thing keeping him powered on were some metal claws screwed into his back and a few loose cables connecting to your terminals.
âsugar plum,â boothill's scruffy voice cut through the silence. âdo y'care to explain where my legs mightâa run off to?â
you actually cocked an eyebrow. how the hell were you supposed to know? boothill was brought back to you in a mess of scraps and wiringâ the damn hunk of metal was lucky you made him as blast proof as possible and he was left salvageable.Â
âcare to tell me how the hell you got this roughed up?â
you asked in turn, crouching down to look at the detached and ruined internals of boothill's torso where the stand-in wires were connected. you ran a finger carefully along the edge of his shredded metallic stomach.
âguess i didn't make you as smart as i thought. time for a newer model, maybe?â
boothill's eyes flickered down to his missing lower half, then to your hand that was more or less caressing him. it was amazing how much annoyance they could show in all their artificial glory.
âlook whoâs talkin.â the cowboy grumbled, pointy fangs poking out in an irritated grin.Â
âhow âbout, âgee, boothill! iâm real glad yâainât get blown to smithereens beyond repair!ââÂ
âit would've been less work for me if whoever blew you up finished the job.â
you sighed as you stood up, putting a hand lazily on your hip.
âhowâd it happen?â
boothill bit back another argument with a gruff chuckle.
âsome real cutie-pies i was huntinâ down had a lilâ more firepower than i expected. guess they didnât appreciate me spoilinâ their party.â
boothill visibly cringed as his insult was substituted with some cutesy nickname mid explanation.
âand can you fix my beautiful synesthesia beacon already? this thing is drivinâ me up the wall.â
the request fell on deaf ears as your fingers typed something on your laptop, likely another string of code.
âyouâre more concerned about your censor than how long itâs gonna take me to put your legs back onâŚâ you sighed to yourself, still leaned over your workbench, eyes focused on your screen.
âi'm not touching it right now. youâre lucky iâm even letting you stay sentient after this.â
boothill snorted at the remark, brows furrowing in a steady grimace.
âwell, âscuse me for wantinâ to speak freelyâ iâm a grown man!â his pointy teeth shone as they peeked out again in a grin.
âyâknow what? just leave yer lilâ tools and all the pieces thereâ iâll get my legs back on myself. donât need no charity work from the likesâa you.â he laughed. âheck, may even give myself a new pecker while i'm at it!â
the mechanic had half a mind to listen, sit back and watch boothill struggle to reassemble himself just to prove a point and simultaneously bask in his embarrassment when the former realised it wasnât possible.
(not that he wouldâve admitted defeatâ you would have begrudgingly stepped in and helped before he inevitably messed up his wiring more.)
you stepped back over to boothill, hands moving to hold his cheeks so you could tilt his face side to side to check for any more damage.
âcool it, cowboy.â your eyes squinted in focus as they looked at boothill's, lightly tugging up on his eyelid to check for scratches or cracks.
âi'll get you back up and running, just lose the attitude already.â
boothill's eyes narrowed as he felt your touch on his face. the temperature difference of warm fingers on his cold, mechanical body stirring an oddity where his gut should have been. though he tried to ignore it, the sensation was there, clear as day against all his artificial nerve endings.Â
âreal easy for you to say,â he huffed, avoiding your eyes as he was examined like a broken toy. âletâs see how peachy you are when yer all strung up and legless, love muffin.â
that censor really was gonna drive him insane.
âjust get it over with.'' boothill muttered in annoyance. âand try not tâfuss anythinâ up.â
it took quite some time, as expected, for you to successfully reattach boothillâs legs and fix his mangled midsection. when you were finally finished, you tugged out any leftover wires that connected boothill to your terminals and pushed back in your wheelie chair to beckon the cowboy forward. you pushed your glasses up to your forehead, some hair getting swept out of your eyes with them.
âfeel fine?â
boothill rolled his ankles and bent his knees, giving his legs a good stretch to test their mobility.
âmighty fine,â he responded, satisfied to feel they were weighted and moved the same as before. âthough i canât say iâm lovinâ the breeze up my backside.âÂ
boothill glanced down at himself, steel body completely bare and lacking any of his signature clothing.Â
âgot my pants lyinâ around anywhere, sugar plum?â
you pointed to another table in the room, where boothills clothesâ (or rather the new ones you had to go and getâ) were neatly folded, his hat placed on top of them.Â
boothill went to get himself dressed, hoisting up his bell bottomed pants and sliding on his jacket. he stole a glance in your direction every so often, resisting the childish urge to roll his eyes at the mere sight of you.
the artificial man hit a small bump in the road as he went to zip his jacket (could you really call it that with how little it covered?) upâ his fingers werenât responding as well as they should have been. he could open and close his fist, but lacked the precision to pinch and hold the zipper.
âhey, honeybun,'' boothill called over to you with a furrowed brow. âdidnât i tell you not to go fudginâ anythinâ up?â
you, in all your overtired glory groaned, turning around in your chair and waving boothill back over.
âwhat are you talking about?âÂ
âmy cute lilâ fingers ainât workinâ thatâs what iâm talkinâ âbout!â
boothill's footsteps were clunky and loud as he stomped his way back over to his mechanic.
you reached for his hand, an uncharacteristic gentleness in your touch as you examined five mechanical fingers.
âmake a fist,â
boothill obeyed, curling his fingers into his palm.
âopen it,â
he obeyed again, letting them open and relax.
âhold up two fingers,â
boothill tried, but his fingers got stuck halfway into the motion, locking at the joints.
âson of a bitch.â you sighed, turning for one of your tools. âsit back down.â
boothill grumbled and went to hoist himself back onto the workbench.
âleast one oâus can say itâŚâÂ
âdo you want me to fix you or not?â
âi'm sittinâ ainât i??â
you pulled boothill's shirt off his left shoulder and popped open a tiny panel on the curve of his neck, sliding your glasses back on to the bridge of your nose. with a lean forward you began carefully looking at a few thin wires that filled the space.
boothill tapped his fingers against the tabletop while you worked, that same oddity as before settling in his now repaired gut. he rarely got messed up enough for you and him to spend this much time together, or for you to have to really be in such close proximity.
itâs not uncomfortable, but the feeling is by no means familiar. itâs actually a little embarrassingâ a galaxy ranger, a space cyborg and expert hunter, feeling almost flustered at some close contact like some kind of shy little girl.
âsomething the matter?â
boothill nearly jumped as you spoke up quietly to check on him, voice quiet and so close to his ear he had to refrain from leaning both closer and away.
ânah, everythingâs just dandy.â boothillâs voice followed yoursâ quieter and a little softer as a result of the closeness.
âyouâre sure?â you looked up from the small mess of wires, eyes glancing up at your cyborg over the rim of your glasses. âmight as well fix anything else thatâs bugging you while iâm here.â
boothill would have swallowed if he had the need to lubricate his throat. he shook his head, turning to look somewhereâ anywhere else.
yours lingered on him, albeit briefly, observing the clench of his jaw and the way he tried to shift in his seat without being disruptive to your work. he didnât see the little smirk tug at your lips as you refocused on the task at hand.
boothillâs cybernetic limbs felt almost human in their sensitivity, sending faux shivers up a spine he didnât even have. the mechanics fingers running down his forearm are doing him no favours as they move to hold his hand again.
âclose your fistâŚopen itâŚtwo fingers upâŚâ
each command was obeyed, ten gunmetal fingers finally holding up a little peace sign.
âthat should be it, come see me if they start acting up again.â
you stood up, tentatively reaching out to fix boothillâs jacket and begin to zip it for him.
boothill didnât protest the act, but it wasâŚconfusing, to say the least.
âreckon iâll just start seeinâ those auto bots again,â he leaned back on his palms as your fingers fixed his collar, straightening it out. âmuch as i love our lilâ visits.â
you only hummed, smoothing out a few wrinkles and neatly tucking his scarf into itâs neckline, as he liked. âyou could,â you mused, hooking your finger lightly into his collar and giving a gentle tug forward. âthey donât take as good care of you as i do, though.â
this time boothill caught the little smirk on your lips, clear as day and enough to make him question if short circuiting was possible.
youâre doing it on purpose, he knows. the careful touches to his hands and body against the sensors you put there, quiet voice leaving him with a frisson you made it possible for him to have.
boothill returned the smirk, albeit a little wobbly.
âyou tryinâa rile me up, sugar plum?âÂ
he entertained you with a lean forward, two white crosshairs looking right at you while he considered if a hand on your waist was too forward or the perfect cornering move.Â
âjust like watching you squirm.â
you were gone as quickly as youâd arrived, finger unhooked and going to pick up his hat.
âbut say i was,â you didnât bother with a glance over as you made sure the brim was straight and unharmed. âi hardly have to try.âÂ
boothill hopped down from the table, following your path and offering a scruffy chuckle when you reached up to place it on his head.
âyeah? and what makes yâsay that?â his hand found a place on his hip.
you didnât respondâ not verbally, anyway. a quick flick of your eyes downwards was all he received.Â
so he followed, looking down as well, to the very appendage he had insisted you give him over and over again pushing against his trousers.Â
his own dream, now his downfall.Â
boothill pushed passed you, pushing his hat further down onto his head while he stomped away. the profanities that left his lips filled the airâ or rather their replacements. something something i love you blah blah peach cobbler something cutie-pie or meow!
âremind me tâsettle for them lovely auto bots next time!â
he opened the door with a firm kick of his boot, stomping out with a scowl.Â
as if he wouldnât be back. you took better care of him, after all.
â 𣲠MASTERLIST / GOT A REQUEST ?
#i have a few leaks and drip marketing and thats it#but idc thats enough hes everything#boothill#boothill x reader#honkai star rail#boothill hsr#boothill honkai star rail#boothill x you#boothill headcanons#honkai star rail x reader#hsr#hsr x reader#hsr boothill#also#i know his synaesthesia beacon replaces the phrase and not only the word#im just not writing all that#UNEARTHLY
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