#and lives of dax which was EXCELLENT

[darktiger57]

I read Fearful Symmetry and The Soul Key recently, and now I'm watching the dominion occupation of ds9 arc and god i hate dukat. i didn't think I could hate him more and then I read those books and now watching this arc just oh god he's awful. like its made every one of his interactions with kira so much worse and they already made my skin crawl

[trillscienceofficer]

Some time ago I talked about the kind of "Jadzia Lives AU" that I would love to read (ie, one where she survives Dukat's attack but she loses the symbiont, which in turns still gets joined to Ezri), and since then I found out about an amazing ongoing fic that's doing exactly that, and with exactly the kind of approach I look for in a Dax story.

Who We Are by @nebulouscoffee really has everything: incredibly good characterization, lots of angst, really good thoughts & execution on Trill embodiment and trauma, an excellent backstory for Ezri's joining, plus it uses DS9's large cast very wisely and the canon divergence is very effectively employed, both emotionally and to shine a light on details and implications that DS9 was very quick to wave away. It's all I ever wanted for a premise I'm really attached to, and I absolutely recommend reading it!!

[thegeminisage]

it's time for!!! a ds9 update <3 wow <333 last night we watched "past prologue" and "a man alone."

past prologue:

FIRST OF ALL, THAT LITTLE GAY DOCTOR

idk what i expected but the scene i've seen gifs of was the VERY FIRST ONE right out of the gate. i was so thrilled. for some reason garak is WAY different than i expected. like, he's just as gay, of COURSE, but for some reason i expected him to be like...meaner. and instead he's sooooo friendly and he's also a fucking tailor. julian bashir needs a new fucking suit.

that said, bashir is so slow on the uptake literally all of the time. the suit thing and something in the other episode that i forgot. king how can you be a doctor when you are so stupid...not that i'm complaining. i wouldn't change it for anything. he's so funny.

HILARIOUS that immediately after he has any clandestine conversations w garak he has to IMMEDIATELY run to the "bridge" and tell everybody about it. he gets so excited. he really is hilarious i don't think he's done a single thing so far that wasn't funny. the fact that he was late to this little party also sir get it together

i think this ep had excellent character stuff for kira, who we've only known 5 minutes. it sets up her history and her current position so well, and her conflict of interests is such a real and tangible thing that i felt awful for her. like you knew from the beginning that guy was gonna betray her but OUCH. ending the ep on her getting called a traitor was Such a choice.

i also loved her little scene with odo..."i don't do pretense" alright autism king. and yet he talked her through it and then sort of took the decision out of her hands at the end (which was a very compassionate thing to do) when it became clear what most of her wanted to do...he's like. a really good person actually 🥺

HE TURNED HIMSELF INTO A RAT.......i love getting shocked when random objects turn out to be odo. i love playing this game. also, there was totally a leaky pipe in that scene too. ds9 feels so fucking lived in...you'd never have those on tng.

i also think sisko did a good job threading the needle here, even if kira had to go over his head to get him to see reason. you gotta do what you gotta do but he was mostly compassionate to kira's dilemma and even let her take point when she requested it...AND THEN LOL smiled while threatening her if she ever went over his head again. WHICH IS WHAT KIRA DOES. SMILES WHEN ANGRY. it was really good. i like him so much

it was such a nice touch to add o'brien telling him not to hand that guy over to the cardassians. the implication being that he was in the room when picard was transported back to the enterprise post-torture which like of COURSE he was. i don't think him outlining in detail picard's torture by those guys would have swayed sisko's opinion much because it's picard so it was also smart that he didn't go into particulars. but it does hammer home that what the cardassians do to people is real to the bajorans and to o'brien in a way that it is not (yet?) real to sisko.

KLINGON SISTERS. when they first appeared i was like "holy shit those boob windows" even though i didn't recognize their faces at all. i recognized only the boob windows. then when they said their names i was like I KNEW IT. what a funny little throwback

side bar i also love that they call the station itself ds9. they don't say deep space nine they say ds9 just like we do

a man alone:

holy racially motivated hate crimes, batman

wait sorry actually let me start at the beginning. the first scene with julian getting shot down 1000 times by jadzia (or are we supposed to call her dax...) was really funny. i'm trying to figure out in my mind palace if he's a bi king or a gay-but-closeted king.

also, so much happened in this episode. there was an a plot a b plot AND a c plot but instead of feeling rushed it just felt comfortably chaotic. i was never waiting for one plot to be over so we could get to the one that really mattered, you know? i liked everything that was going on except for the lack of garak i want him to be in every episode so bad

i like everything jadzia had going on this ep...like, people react to her different as a super hot lady than they did as an old man. sisko's talk about fucking the twins was especially hilarious. dude you can still fuck twins with her if you wanted. but the way that like 3 different people had romantic tension with her and she's just out here to do her job AND ALSO is like "i try to rise above all that" so true aroace queen. although i do actually know she has a romantic plotline with worf (who should be fucking riker and deanna) and also that *** ****, which sucks a lot.

i liked keiko getting an actual plotline in this episode. like this place didn't even have a bed for jake when sisko got here, of course she doesn't wanna raise her daughter there, and of course she's bummed out that her field of expertise is fucking useless there, although i agree w her husband that somebody needs to plant some fucking trees. i do disagree with her that it's less safe than the enterprise, though...that ship almost blows up every fucking week. anyway the fact that sisko was ready to give her whatever she needed was very nice. please treat her really niceys. side bar her baby is AODRABLE that child wanted her hands on that little bell soooo bad

speaking of jake!! it was nice to see him again. i like that when he gets in trouble his dad is obviously pissed without it being like a Problem. like he's pissed and jake is in trouble and sisko is gonna lay down the law but it's not a relationship-threatening issue. it was harmless teenage fun.

unfortunately sisko did kinda carry the idiot ball for the rest of this ep...i feel like there were so many choices he could have made to maybe NOT put a giant target on odo's back and it also took him a lot longer than i would have liked to step in once the mob started going, but he did step in, so that's what matters.

i loved odo in this episode!! he's just as angry as kira is in his own way, and his relationship with both her and quark (WOWWW more on that in a sec) feel so lived in, you can feel the years between them...it's also just now apparent to me that he's actually really protective, which, aw. i love also the lore that every 18 hours he has to just exist as goop in a pail. so true king me too

odo also aroace king he simply chooses not to couple. so true. that said whatever he and quark had going on was FUNNN i love a little sexual tension in my star trek. is he aroace or is he gay for that little ferengi. only time will tell.

on a more serious note odo's quarters getting hate crimed really drives home how set apart he is from others...and the mob section was GENUINELY scary. and he's so protective it was a little sad that kira was the only one really standing up for him :(

I NEARLY FORGOT TO ADD: julian bashir straight up growing a guy in a bubbly goopy little vat just to catch a killer? insane. thats a whole ass person who is about to be part of society who exists "just because." imagine the existential issues lmao

TONIGHT: "babel" and "captive pursuit." technically after babel we're supposed to watch "ship in a bottle" from tng, but i've been informed it's a barclay episode which means i will be watching it myself later tonight on 2x speed. it's not the first time we've fucked with the order a little bit lol (i was famously late finishing tas) so i still count it as mostly watching in release order

[danwhobrowses]

My Highlights of AEW All Out 2023

Normally Chicago would be AEW's 'home away from home', given how it was the birthplace of the idea that was AEW having hosted the original All In. Recent events however meant that there was, uncertainty, about how this would go.

With a slim build, since All In at Wembley was last week, and recent headlines, AEW had to deliver on All Out, but did they? Let's see

Spoilers for the PPV, only positives being listed

Zero Hour

Nice subtle shout out to Windham by Bryan, given that he was his last opponent in a strap match

Dalton Castle in general, that dude has it

Serpentico knew he was done, but at least he wasn't the first to be eliminated

Spears and Garcia having a dance off

Angelo Parker did get his wish, they put him down XD

Trent and Hangman deciding to shake hands

Garcia sad dances up the ramp

Toa Liona's pounce! Hangman ain't a little guy but he went flying

Deadeye finally won Hangman a match

I didn't get a chance to say for Wembley because I didn't get to see much of the finer details but Shida's gear is lovely

Mercedes and Diamante in matching gear

Athena regretting everything when Willow got tagged in

Shida vs Athena, give me what I want.

Sonjay in a basketball jersey, he's a goof

Bringing Aubrey to slight Karen was clever, especially since it offered some bias to the conclusion

Main Card

"This player called Michael Jordan, he was a good player"

Keeping the neck storyline going

MJF coming back for the big pop and hot tag

Joe with the shove XD

MJF vs Joe is a definite money match to cash in on

Christian Cage in general, excellent heel

Darby's selling too, he's made Luchasaurus look like a monster

Darby's Swanton out the ring onto a seated Luchasaurus

The Crucifix Bomb was clean too

Perfectly placed 'Father of the Year' sign

Lovely nearfall on the Avalanche Code Red

Instant chants of 'Meat' for Miro/Hobbs, we need more meat chants

Excalibur even referencing Big E's 'Big Meaty Men Slapping Man Meat'

Hobbs staying on his feet from the Matchka kick

Manly handshake, even if Hobbs then jumps him after

Miro's hot flexible double-jointed wife does exist!

Stat donning some Zoolander gear

A big nearfall with the Avalanche No Future and Destination Unknown too

Ricky coming out strap in hand already, a Cody-esque strap at that

They got Final Countdown again! Joey Tempest must love him some Danielson

That fucking crack from Danielson's whips

I mean you can not fake those hits, there's no leg slapping that is a strap whipping flesh over and over again

That was an amazing flash spear from Ricky too

On brand for ex-teacher Hangman to donate to a Public Education Fund

Shibata vs Claudio is another money singles bout

Claudio's been doing some great narrative heat though with not wanting to entertain Eddie directly

Very clean STO by Eddie

Fack Wheeler's dead by that Shibata backfist

Shibata fucking rocks man, we are so fortunate

Kenny repping the old DDT gear colours

FUCK ME, does Kenny even have a neck anymore?

Kenny isn't a small dude either and but Takeshita has been throwing this dude

"A hell of a kick" is a generic comment from Excalibur there

Takeshita and his bridges, beauteous

Don that would be a fucking murder...

Takeshita beat Kenny clean, which is one hell of a rub

The Gunns' entrance is perfect for the whole BCG group

Mini Cardblade? They better be in the merch store

When the Bucks wanna be dicks, they're very good at being dicks

4-Way Sharpshooter was a nice textbook spot that the Bucks and FTR have in common

Cash and Matt superkicks!? Matt and Dax spike piledriver!?

Four Corners Power Plex!!??

I've been living for these shared finishers

Love the pre-walk before the entrance for the main event too, big fight feel

I've seen the image of Orange's wrapped hand and Moxley, it's a great visual

Mox has looked absolutely feral this match

Blood Orange Cassidy taking pages out of Moxley's book

Beach Break on the unpadded floor, and the fan egging him on

Blood Orange Cassidy's serious kicks getting extra extra serious!

The Death Rider kickout

A tale of two images; a clean padded fist and Moxley, and then an empty backpack and a blood-stained fist of Cassidy

I would've preferred him to have won (Takeshita could've taken it from him to ride off of his win vs Omega) since Mox didn't really need the title but the ending of the PPV tells a greater story - the jester's ascent to worldwide respect - which brings it to a strong close.

Conclusion

Several instances of buffering aside, this was exactly what AEW needed to deliver. A strong PPV that won over a Chicago crowd, reminding the often forgetful wrestling world that AEW exists and thrives without CM Punk. Every time people doubt, AEW deliver big time. I may play a bit of bias and say All In was better by a minor margin, I think the overall match quality was better for All Out (sadly the ROH matches and some abrupt finishes brought it down a little) but I think the narratives and energy was better at All In.

Regardless on what side you're on in his dismissal, AEW picked their path and they are moving forward, moving on, and we've dropped some teases on where we can go next, and those are paths I look forward to seeing fleshed out and explored.

Match of the Night: Honestly, it was Miro/Hobbs for me. It's very tight; I really enjoyed the 8-man, TNT title, Kenny/Konosuke, the main event, the strap match, the the men's non-title tag match, the TBS title (though it did end a bit abruptly) but sometimes you just gotta appreciate big meaty men slapping man meat. Best Entrance: Bullet Club Gold, they look like the real deal with that entrance. Best Attire: Kenneth Jerome Omega with his DDT colours, it still fits him and it was a nice callback. Statlander's Zoolander gear is a close second, since Shida's white gear was technically for last week and barely lost out to Swerve's blue coat. Best Performance: Ricky Starks was close but there's no topping Orange Cassidy this time around. Spot of the Night: I loved the 4-corner power plex, and Takeshita's beautiful German Suplex, but the Strap Match where Ricky and Bryan just were whipping the tar out of each other is the most visceral for me.

[powerbicourseinpune]

Top Power BI Classes in Pune to Boost Your Data Analytics Career

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[ear-worthy]

Pod-Alization: Trevor Noah Podcast Debuts; Who Killed JFK?

Who Killed JFK? podcast debuts on iHeart Conspiracy theories have been around since the days when Egyptian Pharaohs and Roman Emperors dropped dead suddenly and mysteriously. In today's world, social media has amped up the distribution of all kinds of crazy conspiracy theories. You can thank Fox News for being the legitimizer of such crackpot-ness.

Perhaps, the genesis of the modern American conspiracy theory is the assassination of President John F. Kennedy on Novwember 22, 1963.

Was it the mob? Castro? The Russians? I'm sure Trump would find a way to blame Barack Obama for this event.

This new podcast from iHeart has names of distinction and lifelong commitment to excellence associated with the show -- Soledad O'Brien and Rob Reiner.

Who Killed JFK? takes us back 60 years ago to one of the most tragic moments of the 20th century, when questions still surround the assassination of President John F. Kennedy.

Join award-winning journalist Soledad O'Brien and beloved filmmaker Rob Reiner on Wednesdays as they team up to discover the truth behind the assassination, revealing how the ramifications of the 1963 tragedy still impact American society today. *************************************************************

Trevor Noah podcast debuts There's a new maxim in media. Those who don't want to do TV anymore, do podcasts. See Conan O'Brien, Dax Sheppard, Joe Rogan, et al.

Spotify likes to throw around the phrase "highly anticipated" a lot when referring to its original podcast releases.

But its original podcast What Now? with Trevor Noah, which launched on Thursday, November 9, is actually "highly anticipated."

To Noah's credit, he begins with a top-shelf guest who is a notch above the typical celebrity babblefest on audio or video talk shows.

This first episode features a conversation with Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson.

According to Spotify, "What Now? with Trevor Noah is a show wherein each episode Trevor will go deep with a special guest, including entertainers, CEOs, actors, athletes, and thought leaders. These are the kind of conversations that happen behind the scenes, full of radical candor, authentic back-and-forths, and honest reactions, with Trevor bringing to bear his classic, effortlessly playful and equally probing style.

On the first episode of What Now?, Trevor Noah and Dwayne Johnson get real — discussing everything from Dwayne's troubled youth and his lifelong struggles with depression, to Dwayne listening, understanding and responding to public feedback surrounding the launch of his fund following the Maui fires, and whether he'd ever consider running for President of the United States.

The video episode is available exclusively on Spotify, with audio episodes available wherever you get your podcasts. New episodes will publish weekly every Thursday.

Some highlights in the video episode include:

Trevor On Having a Spirited Conversation (1:00)

Trevor: “If there's one thing I've always loved, it's having a spirited conversation. I've always loved how the words coming out of another person's mouth can change how the mush in your brain processes or sees the world that it's seen a certain way for such a long time. It feels like these days, though. We might be losing that ability. Oh, it's become a little bit harder. You know. A few days ago, I was. I was at an event and. People were having really interesting and dynamic conversations, conversations about really difficult topics… men, women, young and old alike. And every few minutes somebody would start their opinion with the phrase. Now, I would never say this in public, but. Or, I would never say this if I was being recorded, but. And I found that fascinating. So many of us have opinions and ideas about the world that we live in. That we are either unable or unwilling. Or too scared to share. And I thought to myself. If we cannot have conversations about difficult things, if the conversations themselves are now the difficult things, then what hope do we have of fixing the difficult things? You know, I almost think of it like a minefield. One of the most dangerous places you can ever walk into is a minefield. Because you do not know. Where they are. You do not know when your last step may be. All you know is at any moment, something could blow up. But the danger comes when you step into the minefield. Imagine if discussing how to navigate the minefield was as dangerous as the minefield itself. That's what I feel like we're living in now.”

The Rock On His Connection to His Culture (13:33)

“At a very early age from my mom and my dad, it was always ‘what you are is perfect’ and ‘what you are is cool.’ Black culture, Samoan culture. We come from a world of pro wrestling. And at that time, Trevor, if you think about it, pro wrestling was nowhere near the global juggernaut that it is today. And it was, it was a very small subculture. So be proud of everything that you are out of the gate, It was always ‘be proud’… It's a cool thing. And I got to tell you, as you go down the road of life, you start to realize just how special culture is, how special all of our culture is.”

The Rock On Why He Wanted to Be A Wrestler (17:32)

“Not only did I grow up in it… but man, I loved it. I loved wrestling. I love the antics of it. I love the characters of it. And especially at that time, you know, when you grow up in the 80s, wrestling back then was a whole different, I think, unique experience in that a lot of people bought into it and they felt like it was real and they'd have these local stars every week and they'd be on their television sets, just their local TVs, and they would talk down the lens about what they're going to do to their opponent this Saturday night at whatever little arena they're wrestling in. I loved all that, and I had a front-row seat watching my dad and my grandfather and everybody in my family live their passions and it's what they, I believe, were all born to do… And so. I think the yearning of it, it started to happen for me when, to be honest, when we were evicted out of Hawaii. So we were living in a little apartment. We were evicted when I was 13 or 14 years old. And I remember in that moment I never wanted to feel that again. I was with my mom and we came home and there was a padlock or there was a notice… I remember just her and I were standing there. She was crying. She didn't know what to do. And my dad was wrestling in Tennessee at that time. And I remember then thinking, I never want to experience this again and what can I do to change it? What can I do? Like, what can I do with my own two hands on 14 so I can't do shit, right?… So I remember at that time thinking, well, all the heroes in my life are these guys. These guys who are, they’re big, they’re strong. They're pro wrestlers. I bet you if I built my body and if I went to the gym, then I could change the scenario. So from that moment, I think that is the defining moment.”

The Rock On Starting the People’s Fund of Maui and Reacting To The Initial Backlash (22:32)

Trevor: “…you know, when you feel like you've missed a news cycle, like The Rock and Oprah under fire. But for what? And people were like, Oh, you're the problem. And how dare you? And why would you? And I was like, Man, our whole lives, people have asked people to join into a worthy cause. When did this become a criticism or a fight? And I would love to know how you process that.”

The Rock: “I woke up the next morning wondering the same thing. Thinking. What? What happened? Did I miss something? So it took me a couple of weeks to really process that. And I felt like that moment was a pivotal moment for me in my life for a few reasons. Number one, I want to go back to the brass tacks of it and the whole idea of creating this fund, the People's Fund of Maui, is to help people and help survive and thrive. These are my people. These are my Polynesian people. My Hawaiian Kanaka Ohana. My grandparents. They're all buried in the islands, you know, So it meant so much to me. And I know it meant so much to our people, Right. That we were able to come together and create this fund. Over 8000 survivors, by the way we're helping right now. It's really beautiful. But what's interesting is when all that started to happen and the backlash started to happen and it started to come our way. So I always feel like in moments like that, it's important. Not to get caught up in it. It's important just to pause. Let's be prudent. Let's pause. But let me just wait and see. And. I felt like my gut said it's going to take a couple of weeks, but let me really take a look at it. I don't want to respond to it right now. Yeah, let's stay focused on the mission. And the mission is to help the survivors right now who have nothing. And they are devastated. And so let's continue to stand the fund up on its feet. But at the same time, I want to pay attention to this. And it really tested my ability to separate noise from criticism that was really worthy of my attention in this case and this noise. And at first it was a wave of noise. Okay, how dare you ask us for money? And I thought the same thing you did was right. Whatever you can give, if you want to give a prayer. Great. A buck, seven bucks, or nothing. So there was the noise that started to feel like it was political noise. Then it started to feel like it was. It just started to feel really noisy. And I wanted to make sure that we just paused and I was just waiting for. Well, where's the criticism here that is worthy of my attention? That really makes sense. And then, Ah, that's it. This is what I feel I got. And it took me weeks before I figured this out. And I had a I just had a moment one night, and I think I was as I usually do, I was having a drink, drink off and clear my mind and clear all this shit up in my head. And once all that left, I thought, Ah, that's it. And I saw someone had posted something and it was something to the effect of basically don't pay attention to these guys and all this other bullshit that they're saying. However, you're one of us. And when I read You're one of us was the thing that made me go. Got it. Went back to when I was in Hawaii. When I got evicted, we had nothing. I was a troubled kid. I got arrested like you. I mean, you know, we both were troubled kids, arrested multiple times. I was always pissed that we were broke. There's a difference between being poor and then being broke. And I was pissed. I was always angry, getting in fights, getting in trouble. And the last thing I realized in that moment, the last thing that I wanted to hear was somebody asked me for money. Especially if the dude who I like, right, is asking me for money, and he already has money, and I get it. And a lot of times when you're in that situation, I've been there when you are living paycheck to paycheck. You're in it. Yeah. And you're not necessarily vibrating, you know, at a certain level and you're in it. So I came out of that and then I went, That's right. I got it. Now I understand. And you know what? Last thing you wanted was to hear people ask for money regardless of the situation.”

Trevor On The Power of Global Connection (51:57)

Trevor: “I mean, we were doing your moves in the gym at school. We had detention, and we had this like giant room where you would just get locked in and was like, that's your detention. It was like a gym, really, but it was a massive gym and we would put out all these mats. And would be like alright we’re practicing The Rock’s moves. Let's go and everyone would get in there and I'm talking like almost two stories high and we'd climb up on the railing. That's just a cage match. And you'd grab someone. You know what I mean?… Think about that connection. Think about how far that was. Think about how far you were from me in South Africa. Think about how far I was from you in the United States. And yet in that moment, we were connected.”

[justdreamsstuff]

Here are 75 quotes about success to inspire you to keep pushing forward and achieve your dreams

"If you set your goals ridiculously high and it's a failure, you will fail above everyone else's success." James Cameron

"Success usually comes to those who are too busy to be looking for it." Henry David Thoreau

"Things work out best for those who make the best of how things work out." John Wooden

"Entrepreneurs average 3.8 failures before final success. What sets the successful ones apart is their amazing persistence." Lisa M. Amos

"If you are not willing to risk the usual, you will have to settle for the ordinary." Jim Rohn

"Take up one idea. Make that one idea your life--think of it, dream of it, live on that idea. Let the brain, muscles, nerves, every part of your body, be full of that idea, and just leave every other idea alone. This is the way to success." Swami Vivekananda

"Stop chasing the money and start chasing the passion." Tony Hsieh

"All our dreams can come true if we have the courage to pursue them." Walt Disney

"If you are willing to do more than you are paid to do, eventually you will be paid to do more than you do." Anonymous

"Success is walking from failure to failure with no loss of enthusiasm." Winston Churchill

"Whenever you see a successful person, you only see the public glories, never the private sacrifices to reach them." Vaibhav Shah

"Success? I don't know what that word means. I'm happy. But success, that goes back to what in somebody's eyes success means. For me, success is inner peace. That's a good day for me." Denzel Washington

"Opportunities don't happen. You create them." Chris Grosser

"Try not to become a person of success, but rather try to become a person of value." Albert Einstein

"It is not the strongest of the species that survive, nor the most intelligent, but the one most responsive to change." Charles Darwin

"Great minds discuss ideas; average minds discuss events; small minds discuss people." Eleanor Roosevelt

"The best revenge is massive success." Frank Sinatra

"I have not failed. I've just found 10,000 ways that won't work." Thomas Edison

"A successful man is one who can lay a firm foundation with the bricks others have thrown at him." David Brinkley

"No one can make you feel inferior without your consent." Eleanor Roosevelt

"The whole secret of a successful life is to find out what is one's destiny to do, and then do it." Henry Ford

"If you're going through hell, keep going." Winston Churchill

"What seems to us as bitter trials are often blessings in disguise." Oscar Wilde

"The distance between insanity and genius is measured only by success." Bruce Feirstein

"Don't be afraid to give up the good to go for the great." John D. Rockefeller

"Happiness is a butterfly, which when pursued, is always beyond your grasp, but which, if you will sit down quietly, may alight upon you." Nathaniel Hawthorne

"If you can't explain it simply, you don't understand it well enough." Albert Einstein

"There are two types of people who will tell you that you cannot make a difference in this world: those who are afraid to try and those who are afraid you will succeed." Ray Goforth

"Start where you are. Use what you have. Do what you can." Arthur Ashe

"People ask, 'What's the best role you've ever played?' The next one." Kevin Kline

"I find that the harder I work, the more luck I seem to have." Thomas Jefferson

"The starting point of all achievement is desire." Napoleon Hill

"Success is the sum of small efforts, repeated day-in and day-out." Robert Collier

"If you want to achieve excellence, you can get there today. As of this second, quit doing less-than-excellent work." Thomas J. Watson

"All progress takes place outside the comfort zone." Michael John Bobak

"You may only succeed if you desire succeeding; you may only fail if you do not mind failing." Philippos

"Courage is resistance to fear, mastery of fear--not absence of fear." Mark Twain

"Only put off until tomorrow what you are willing to die having left undone." Pablo Picasso

"We become what we think about most of the time, and that's the strangest secret." Earl Nightingale

"The only place where success comes before work is in the dictionary." Vidal Sassoon

"I don't know the key to success, but the key to failure is trying to please everyone." Bill Cosby

"Though no one can go back and make a brand-new start, anyone can start from now and make a brand-new ending." Carl Bard

"I find that when you have a real interest in life and a curious life, that sleep is not the most important thing." Martha Stewart

"Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things that you didn't do than by the ones you did do. So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover." Mark Twain

"The first step toward success is taken when you refuse to be a captive of the environment in which you first find yourself." Mark Caine

"Whenever you find yourself on the side of the majority, it is time to pause and reflect." Mark Twain

"The successful warrior is the average man, with laser-like focus." Bruce Lee

"Rarely have I seen a situation where doing less than the other guy is a good strategy." Jimmy Spithill

"Keep on going, and the chances are that you will stumble on something, perhaps when you are least expecting it. I never heard of anyone ever stumbling on something sitting down." Charles F. Kettering

"If you genuinely want something, don't wait for it--teach yourself to be impatient." Gurbaksh Chahal

"You can't connect the dots looking forward; you can only connect them looking backward. So you have to trust that the dots will somehow connect in your future. You have to trust in something--your gut, destiny, life, karma, whatever. This approach has never let me down, and it has made all the difference in my life." Steve Jobs

"If you want to make a permanent change, stop focusing on the size of your problems and start focusing on the size of you!" T. Harv Eker

"Successful people do what unsuccessful people are not willing to do. Don't wish it were easier; wish you were better." Jim Rohn

"The No. 1 reason people fail in life is because they listen to their friends, family, and neighbors." Napoleon Hill

"In my experience, there is only one motivation, and that is desire. No reasons or principle contain it or stand against it." Jane Smiley

"Success does not consist in never making mistakes but in never making the same one a second time." George Bernard Shaw

"I don't want to get to the end of my life and find that I lived just the length of it. I want to have lived the width of it as well." Diane Ackerman

"Motivation is what gets you started. Habit is what keeps you going." Jim Ryun

"Our greatest fear should not be of failure ... but of succeeding at things in life that don't really matter." Francis Chan

"If you don't design your own life plan, chances are you'll fall into someone else's plan. And guess what they have planned for you? Not much." Jim Rohn

"Nobody ever wrote down a plan to be broke, fat, lazy, or stupid. Those things are what happen when you don't have a plan." Larry Winget

"To be successful you must accept all challenges that come your way. You can't just accept the ones you like." Mike Gafka

"Be content to act, and leave the talking to others." Baltasar

"You may have to fight a battle more than once to win it." Margaret Thatcher

"Be patient with yourself. Self-growth is tender; it's holy ground. There's no greater investment." Stephen Covey

"I owe my success to having listened respectfully to the very best advice, and then going away and doing the exact opposite." G. K. Chesterton

"Many of life's failures are people who did not realize how close they were to success when they gave up." Thomas A. Edison

"The greater the artist, the greater the doubt. Perfect confidence is granted to the less talented as a consolation prize." Robert Hughes

"What would you attempt to do if you knew you would not fail?" Robert Schuller

"Always bear in mind that your own resolution to success is more important than any other one thing." Abraham Lincoln

"Successful and unsuccessful people do not vary greatly in their abilities. They vary in their desires to reach their potential." John Maxwell

"Would you like me to give you a formula for success? It's quite simple, really: Double your rate of failure. You are thinking of failure as the enemy of success. But it isn't at all. You can be discouraged by failure or you can learn from it, so go ahead and make mistakes. Make all you can. Because remember that's where you will find success." Thomas J. Watson

"Logic will get you from A to B. Imagination will take you everywhere." Albert Einstein

"Success is just a war of attrition. Sure, there's an element of talent you should probably possess. But if you just stick around long enough, eventually something is going to happen." Dax Shepard

"My tombstone? I'm thinking something along the lines of, 'Geez, he was just here a minute ago.'" George Carlin

[crowdvscritic]

round up // JANUARY 21

New year, not-so-new Crowd vs. Critic! It’s another batch of films, TV, music, and reads that were new to me this month and think you would enjoy, too. As we cozy up inside for the winter, nothing warms you up like a good piece of pop culture.

January Crowd-Pleasers

Wonder Woman 1984 (2020)

Does this sequel reach the heights of 2017’s Wonder Woman? No, but I wish more superhero movies were like this one. I explain why at ZekeFilm. Crowd: 9.5/10 // Critic: 8/10

21 Bridges (2019)

A solid action crime thriller with a solid Chadwick Boseman at the center. Crowd: 8.5/10 // Critic: 7.5/10

The Lethal Weapon Series (1987-98)

I watched the first Lethal Weapon in 2017 for ZekeFilm, but now I’ve a decade’s pleasure of progressively over-the-top action sequences and progressively more absurd ways to destroy Roger Murtaugh’s (Danny Glover) house. The Murtaugh/Riggs bromance holds this progressively sillier series together, and an supporting cast of charismatic actors (Jet Li, Darlene Love, Chris Rock, Rene Russo) are game for whatever comes their way. Joe Pesci is the true MVP. Series Crowd: 9/10 // Series Critic: 7/10

The High Note (2020)

Tracee Ellis Ross’s Grace Davis is a diva in every sense of the word. A high-strung and highly successful singer, she’s also highly demanding of her assistant Maggie (Dakota Johnson), who wants to step out of her shadow and become a music producer. This rom-com-adjacent flick is one of the most fun escapes I’ve had from a 2020 movie, and it’s perfect for a girls’ night in. Crowd: 8.5/10 // Critic: 7/10

Double Feature—Rom-Coms With a Magical Twist: Just My Luck (2006) + When In Rome (2010)

Disclaimer: These movies are not good. In fact, they’re junk, but they’re my kind of junk. In Just My Luck (Crowd: 7.5/10 // Critic: 6/10), Lindsay Lohan loses her life-long lucky streak when she kisses schlimazel Chris Pine. And When in Rome (Crowd: 8/10 // Critic: 6/10), Kristen Bell attracts unwanted admirers (Will Arnett, Danny DeVito, Josh Duhamel, Jon Heder, and real-life future husband Dax Shepard) after she steals their coins from a wishing fountain. To their credit, both of these movies know they’re silly, which means you have permission to just sit back and laugh along with (or, honestly, at) them.

WandaVision (2021)

I sometimes fear for the world of entertainment when I think of how much intellectual property Disney has gobbled up, but WandaVision is evidence the company is a benevolent dictator at least for now. This odd delight is a send up and a tribute to sitcoms like I Love Lucy, I Dream of Jeannie, and The Brady Bunch, and Paul Bettany and Elizabeth Olsen are so charming and weird I don’t need whatever mysterious sub-plot they’re building.

Robin Hood: Men in Tights (1993)

If you want to make the most of watching Robin Hood: Men in Tights, first watch Robin Hood: Prince of Thieves (1991), an action flick I saw last February and didn’t include in my monthly Round Up. This Mel Brooks spoof is a direct response that self-serious Kevin Costner adventure, even down to copying its costumes. While I wish I could find a Mel Brooks comedy with any substantial female character (in every movie I’ve seen so far, the joke is either, “She’s got a great rack!” or “Wow, she’s an uggo!”), I still couldn’t stop laughing at this 104-minute version of the Robin Hood scene in Shrek. Crowd: 9/10 // Critic: 8/10

Aliens (1986)

Peak ‘80s action. Peak alien grossness. Peak girl boss Sigourney Weaver. Crowd: 9/10 // Critic: 8/.510

Big (1988)

After talking about Laverne & Shirley with Kyla on SO IT’S A SHOW?, I had to check out Penny Marshall’s classic. While a few moments haven’t aged so well, its heart is sweet and the script is hilarious. And that Tom Hanks? I think he’s going places. Crowd: 9.5/10 // Critic: 8/10

Unstoppable (2010)

I’ve laughed at SNL’s spoof of this movie for a decade, so it’s about time I got around to enjoying this action thriller very loosely based on the true story of a train that got away from its conductor. Denzel Washington (“You’re too old!”) and Chris Pine (“You’re too young!”) are our heroes in this over-the-top ridiculousness, and their chemistry is so extra it makes me hope they team up for another movie again. Crowd:  9/10 // Critic: 7/10

January Critic Picks

Double Feature—‘90s Space Adventures: Apollo 13 (1995) + Contact (1997)

I have no desire to join Tom Cruise as he films in space, but I know I’ll be pumped to watch whatever he makes because I love sci-fi and space  adventures. Apollo 13 (Crowd: 9/10 // Critic: 9/10) tells the story of an almost-disastrous NASA mission in the ‘60s, and it taps into our hope for the human spirit to overcome obstacles. Contact (Crowd: 8.5/10 // Critic: 8.5/10) surmises what might happen if we received communication from extraterrestrial life, and it taps into our struggle to reconcile faith and science.

McCartney III by Paul McCartney (2020)

I spent January catching up on the albums on Best of 2020 lists, and the one I listened to for hours and hours was Paul McCartney’s latest solo album. Catchy, thoughtful, and musically surprising, it ranges from pop to rock to folk in 45 minutes and still feels like it’s over too soon. Like Tom Hanks, this Paul McCartney guy is going places!

The Thin Man Series (1934-47)

Like Lethal Weapon, I watched the first installment of The Thin Man awhile back, and Kyla and I even covered the series on our podcast. But thanks to a full series marathon on TCM earlier this month, I’ve now laughed through all five. When you talk about great chemistry, you’ve got to talk about William Powell and Myrna Loy, who make Nick and Nora’s marriage feel lived in and romantic as they solve crimes together. Witty, suspenseful, and jaunty, this series is still sexy cool over 80 years later. (Also, Asta? Still one of the cutest dogs in cinema.) Series Crowd: 8.5/10 // Critic: 8.5/10

The King and I (1956)

Here’s your regularly scheduled reminder Hollywood works differently now, and many casting decisions of the ‘50s wouldn’t fly today. What has aged well in this film: The Rodgers and Hammerstein music and the sumptuous costumes and set design. I love extravagant musicals of yesteryear—perhaps it’s time for Hollywood to revisit and remake The King and I for modern audiences?

Inauguration Day

In a year with no major televised events with celebrities in a room together, Inauguration Day felt like the most exciting cultural event in ages. We’ve been missing major fashion, but then we got Lady Gaga! We’ve been missing live performances, but then we got Amanda Gorman! And I got a lot of tears during that poem—not just me, right?

Good Reads

Writing that made me think and smile this month:

Steven Soderbergh’s list of everything he read, watched, and listened to this year, Extension765.com (2020) – An indirect inspiration for these monthly Round Ups!

“My Year of Making Lists,” NewYorker.com (2020) – I made a lot of lists in 2020, so I feel this author’s #mood

“Betty White Says She Will Spend Her 99th Birthday Feeding Two Ducks Who Visit Her ‘Every Day,’“ CBSNews.com (2021) - “Betty is a treasure,” I say as I watch The Proposal for the 99th time

“A Sculpture’s Unusual Journey to SLAM [St. Louis Art Museum],” SLAM.org (2020) – With a casual mention of an attraction I never knew about in St. Louis

“The Culture Is Ailing. It’s Time for a Dr. Fauci for the Arts.” WashingtonPost.com (2020) – An idea that occurred to me a few months ago: Why don’t we have an Arts Cabinet?

“The Arts Are in Crisis. Here’s How Biden Can Help.” NYTimes.com (2021) – Partly in response to that Washington Post piece, a historical look at how artists have made it through difficult times in the past and how we can revive artists’ livelihoods mid- and post-pandemic

“The Right’s Message to Silicon Valley: 'Free Speech for Me, But Not for Thee,'” TIME.com (2021) – A more thoughtful and less reactionary take on a volatile moment in the history of modern technology

“'It Makes Me Sick With Grief': Trump's Presidency Divided Families. What Happens to Them Now?” TIME.com (2021) – A study on how politics has done damage to family dynamics in America

“Help, the Only Cinema I Can Handle Is Zac Efron Prancing Angrily in High School Musical 2,” Vulture.com (2021) - In a lot of ways, same

“50 Easy Things To Do When You are Anxious,” ShopTwentySeven.com (2021) – I especially endorse coloring, puzzling, and watching happy movies!

Double Feature—Miss Marple Mysteries: Murder at the Gallop (1963) + Murder Ahoy (1964)

Remember when I was all like, “Watch these Agatha Christie movies so you’re not sad Death on the Nile is delayed”? Remember when I said I was just a few movies away from becoming an Agatha Christie junkie? Well, I think I’m there because I can’t stop with the murder mysteries! Margaret Rutherford is a treasure whether she’s solving a murder at a horse ranch or on a boat, and a cast of colorful supporting characters (including Rutherford’s husband) makes these breezy instead of heavy. Crowd: 8/10 // Critic: 8/10

8½ (1963)

File this with 2001: A Space Odyssey—I don’t know if I really understood this film, but I think I liked it? Federico Fellini’s surrealist, male gaze-y drama blurs the lines between reality and imagination, love and dysfunction, and the past and maybe some future that involves clowns? What resonated with me was the story of a director with creative block, wondering if he’s already peaked and if he’ll create anything worthwhile again. Crowd: 6/10 // Critic: 9/10

Sense and Sensibility: The Screenplay and Diaries by Emma Thompson (1995)

Sense and Sensibility is not just one of my favorite Jane Austen adaptations—it’s one of my all-time favorite films. One of the co-hosts of one of my favorite podcasts has raved many-a-time about Emma Thompson’s journals from the making of film, so it was only a matter of time before I read them myself. Witty, informative, and all-around lovely, Thompson’s journals are an excellent insight into the filmmaking process and how novels are adapted.

Also in January…

I reviewed the new-ish documentary Flannery for ZekeFilm, which is all about the writer Flannery O’Connor and feels a little like going back to high school English class.

In addition to the Lethal Weapon and Thin Man series, I rewatched all of the X-Men series this month. You can see everything I am watching on Letterboxd, including favorites I love returning to (i.e. X-Men: Days of Future Past) and the movies I try that don’t make my monthly recommendations (i.e. The Wolverine).

Photo credits: Paul McCartney, Zac Efron, Sense & Sensibility. All others IMDb.com.

[scarlettrhettelizabethrichard]

Chapter 7. Neighbours & Mills Associates, my GWTW fanfiction

To read all the chapters of my GWTW fanfiction The Boutique Robillard, check my blog  https://alarecherchedutempsperdu.over-blog.com/tag/the%20robillard%20boutique/

****

Chronology : 1865 : Duncan returns to Paris, creates La Mode Duncan - 1873, December, divorce - 1874, January, Rhett visits Paris - 1875, january : Duncan returns to Charleston ; he buys Magnolias' Mansion ; Duncan "builds" the Vayton & Harvey Mills factory - 1875, February 5th : Rhett meets Duncan at Magnolias' Mansion - 1876, February : Grand Father Robillard died, Scarlett inherits, discovers La Mode Duncan' shop in Savanah - 1876, May : Scarlett opens her fashion shop in Atlanta - 1876, May : Charleston's event for Duncan.

Here is a long chapter. First, Duncan must buy his spinning factory for the textiles he is going to use. On the second part of this chapter comes the tough part : THE meeting Rhett x Duncan. Not really tough because our - their - dear Scarlett is not between yet...

********

Charleston, 1875, January

The management of his family legacy eventually secure, the young couturier could now set up the American branch of "La Mode Duncan". No time was to be wasted, for the task was going to be tough.

First and foremost, a telegram had to be sent to Lille, France. "Blanche - stop - Need you - stop - Emigrate to America - stop - Take your children with you - stop – I send certificate of employment - stop - Letter follows - stop. » Blanche would be surprised by this terse text, but she would soon understand the situation by reading his letter to her. He explained what he wanted from her, and enclosed certificates guaranteeing her a job and a place to live when she arrived in Charleston. Duncan had no doubt that the loyal Blanche would immediately leave her family, her former life, to take her chances and emigrate to North America at the request of the owner of "La Mode Duncan" France. He would arranged the immigration formalities for her so that she would not have to worry about them and booked a place on the ship in the port of Le Havre. He didn't forget to send another telegram to his partner Roger Dax so that he could give one of his best workers a subsequent bonus. If all went well, Blanche Augustine Bonsart would be there in time for the creation of the new "La Mode Duncan" workshop in Charleston. ***

 In the meantime, it took all his energy to select a textile factory capable of producing his own fabrics. There was no question of importing yards of fabric from France because he wanted to take advantage of the craze for local products, which was strong in the 1870s. Duncan had seen this when he visited the gigantic H. B. Claftin and C° shop in New York, which specialised in American-made textiles*. His first dilemma was to locate his spinning mill. The majority of them were located in the Northern states. The small factories in the South processed only a negligible amount of bales while, paradoxically, the South was the Master of cotton production. In keeping with his values, he wanted to set up in one of the former Confederate states. He was pleased to find that several mills had been established in South Carolina along the rivers, because of the abundant forests providing cheap resin to power the steam-powered machines. In early January he chose the best woolen mills owned by Jerry Harvey, and offered him a partnership. "Vayton & Son Ltd would buy 60% of the shares to take over management control. The textile entrepreneur thus ensured that he had full control over production methods, because the real problem facing Duncan was the quality of the final product. "Mr Harvey, we have to face an unpleasant reality. As you know, the textiles that come out of our Southern mills are 'low grade'. You produce mainly canvas, which is bought mostly by poor blacks, and cretonnes, such as shirting and drills, which are sold in the West*, but « La Mode Duncan » targets a wealthy clientele. It therefore had to use only the best-quality fabrics, comparable to those woven in France, in Roubaix, Mulhouse or Lyon. » "I am aware of that, Sir. Vayton & Harvey Woolen Mill Ltd will, no doubt, be able to rise to the challenge with the investment you are making available." "It's true, Mr. Harvey, the project is ambitious but necessary to master the quality at all stages. Our objective is, in the short or medium term, to dominate the high quality textile market, at least for South Carolina, Georgia and Louisiana. The sales potential is promising as it meets the aspirations of the upper class ladies and the nouveau riche. My tailor shop will of course be the first customer for "high-end" fabrics. We'll build a loyal following of Southern tailors and dressmakers who are frustrated that they can't buy better textiles locally. » Jerry Harvey adds: "I understand that you want our factory to be like the most modern textile mills in the North, managing all stages of production from the intake of cellulose bales, through spinning, weaving, dyeing and printing, to the transformation of the finished product." The owner of the French spinning mill Vayton & Dax said: "Yes, we must be inspired by the modernity of the North for the automation of tasks allowing a better output, use machines for certain stages such as the handling of the cellulose bags by winch and not by hand, etc..  The labour we save will be wisely transferred to other stages of production, such as dyeing and printing. » Jerry Harvey was impressed by his technical knowledge of the American market, despite the fact that he had just spent ten years in France. "What is your idea of influencing these steps? » The strength of the North American spinning mills is their modernity, speed of manufacture and large quantity produced. It is also their weakness. Compare, for example, the number of looms managed by each worker: here in the North, a single weaver is in charge of five machines, with the added requirement of speed. In France, as in my spinning mill in Roubaix, the worker is only in charge of two looms at a time*. You can understand that, in these conditions, even fabrics of common quality have many manufacturing defects. This is why Vayton & Harvey Woolen Mills Ltd will reduce the number of looms run by one worker to two." "That's an excellent suggestion. It will be expensive, of course, but it will pay off in the end," reassured Jerry Harvey. "Dyeing is my concern because I would like to use indigo. I know that its use is becoming scarce, but let's rely on the authenticity of local products. In the same spirit, we need to hire skilled chemists to ensure the consistency of the colours of the print. » "In conclusion, in order to get closer to French quality, we will have to increase the number of staff and systematically check for defects at every stage. » Duncan was satisfied that he had reached the end of his argument. "Yes, Mr Harvey, you and I are about to embark on a great adventure. This week I will contact an architect to modernise the warehouses. My contacts in the North have sent me the manufacturer's catalogue so that I can order the new looms and the more efficient printing machines. I am determined that production can start within three months. » Enthusiastically, Jerry Harvey proposed to his new partner: "I will submit to you within the week a projection of the number of employees to be hired, for each stage of transformation, by position. We can keep the American quota of two-thirds women in the spinning mill for jobs that don't require the use of too much force,* because they too need to work to overcome the economic depression. We will need more women spoolers, carders, and defect workers. »

Jerry Harvey's head was spinning. He felt an immense relief: the family spinning mill created by his father was saved! What's more, its fame would soon spread throughout the Deep South! For Duncan, all that remained was to set up his high fashion studio "La Mode Duncan" in Charleston. The hardest part was yet to come! *****

Charleston, 1875, Wednesday 5 February, at the Butler's "Rhett! I would really like you to come with us in the late afternoon with our new neighbours. The reception is not formal. It's just a « vin d’honneur » to celebrate the Vaytons' move to Magnolias' Mansion. » Rhett looked at Eleonor Butler with an amused expression: "Mother, your son is 48 years old. I think you can do without my presence to go and have tea with your friends. » "It's in your best interest. Three years ago, when you came back from Atlanta, didn't you tell me that you wanted to regain your place among our good Charleston society? I admit that you have made great efforts with your charity work. But what better support could you gain than from Charleston's oldest and most respected family? Especially since this friendship could also benefit your business, as the heir to Vayton Ltd is one of the richest men in the United States of America! » Faced with this avalanche of arguments, Rhett had only one solution: to accept the invitation to the Vaytons. *****

Charleston, 1875, Wednesday 5 February, at the Vayton home Melina had learned her lesson well by leaving the "hospitality" door to the porch open to let the Butler neighbours know that they were eagerly awaited. Barnabee, the butler, opened the inner door to the piazza. Mrs. Vayton came to greet them warmly and directed them on their right to the drawing room. Eleonor Butler and her daughter had had many opportunities to be received by the previous owners, the Hopkins. Nevertheless, they were amazed by the new interior design. Mrs. Vayton introduced her daughter to the Butlers. Rhett paid his respects to Cathleen and Melina with an elegant hand kiss. They were charmed. The lady of the house apologised to her guests: "My son is in his office. He had to write an urgent letter to France. He will join us in a few minutes. » The four women settled into comfortable chairs and happily began to exchange stories about the Battery. Rhett took the opportunity to cast his art-loving eye over the impressively large reception room. Everything was a harmony of forms, styles and materials. The room occupied the entire width of the façade. The light, that radiated from the five front windows and the two French windows overlooking the piazza, accentuated the grandiose aspect of this room reserved for prestigious guests and receptions among friends. The aesthete appreciated the conscious choice to contrast the curves of the architecture with the straight lines of the furniture. The sinuosity of the wall of the three bowed-windows stretched like a serpentine on either side of the other two windows. These curved lines echoed the moulded stucco frieze around the ceiling and the arch over the door. What an aesthetic success! The osmosis between the curves, the glitter of light, the walls partially painted in pale yellow, while the ceiling, the base and the windows were of a brilliant white, instilled an atmosphere of tranquillity. The softness of the whole was accentuated by the pale yellow lustrous silk of the upholstered seats. The contrast with the rigorous Empire style of the French furnishings Duncan bought in New York was all the more striking. Straight, clean lines, sharp-edged ornaments. The same antagonism of colours struck the visitor, between the mahogany and gold bronzes of the furniture as if lifted by the blond oak floor. Rhett was fascinated. Of course, he knew the French style that Emperor Napoleon Bonaparte had initiated: originally furniture dedicated the military men, a martial style, straight seats that allowed soldiers, such as General Bonaparte, to keep their swords in a seated position without embarrassment. A spartan and severe spirit that was called the Directoire style**. When Napoleon was crowned Emperor, with the pomp of the Court, the furniture became a pretext to testify to the power and wealth of the Empire. The flamed mahogany veneer was decorated with luxurious ornaments in gilded bronze, like the magnificent sphinxes enthroned under the armrests of the armchairs in the Vayton salon or the caryatids placed on either side of the overmantel. This large pier-mirror topped a black marble fireplace in the American Federal style that the first owner of the house had installed. Meanwhile, Barnabee had made his entrance. Three large silver trays generously garnished with fine food had been placed on the round side tables protected by beautiful embroidered tablecloths. The cook, Netty, had taken particular care in preparing the small canapés and other croustades. This was the very first invitation from the Vayton family. Even though it was not a dinner party, it was important to honour the closest neighbours of the Magnolias' Mansion. Barnabee was now dexterously serving refreshments. Rhett politely accepted a canapé with scallop terrine, and then resumed his admiring inspection of the place, while the four women were absorbed in discovering common interests. While admiring the finesse of the "Return from Egypt" sculptures,** Rhett the businessman recalled a conversation he had had with some English entrepreneurs in London. An idea came to him. It seemed obvious. At last he would find the excitement of embarking on a great adventure... The elegance and luxury of the place definitely appealed to him. Suddenly a regret assailed Rhett: "If only I had helped Scarlett refine her tastes, instead of leaving her without advice and mocking her disastrous decorative choices, I'm sure she would have loved the abundance of golden bronzes and the warmth of mahogany." The Old Guard would have been jealous of his wife, that's for sure, because of the display of so much luxury. But at least they would not have reproached her for a lapse in taste. "How I regret, Scarlett..." Rhett shook his head to get rid of the flush of weakness that once again overtook him. "Damn it! Why can't I put her out of my mind? Even a year after our divorce - no! It's been fifteen months since our divorce, sixteen months since we saw each other, Scarlett - and you still torment me! Will there be no end to this? » The entrance of the master of the house interrupted his depressing thoughts and he stood up to greet the young man who was holding out his hand. After Cathleen introduced their neighbours to Duncan Vayton, he sat down opposite the Butlers' eldest son. In a fraction of a second, the two gentlemen looked at each other. Rhett thought to himself that the young Vayton exuded sympathy with his frank smile and keen eye. "His good looks must please the ladies! Old Ashley would be jealous of his blonde hair. "He chuckled under his breath, still eager to belittle Scarlett's former blond knight, now quite grey. Duncan, for his part, was impressed by Mr Butler's bearing. The man wore his age elegantly, and his impeccable dress showed an undeniable accuracy of taste. Both men identified the other as belonging to the caste of well-born and refined gentlemen. "May I offer you a glass? In your honour, I have selected an excellent Cote Chateau Lafite Rothschild, from the 1870 vintage. This bottle is part of the reserve that I brought back from France when I returned here in January. I am sure you are a great connoisseur yourself, and I will be happy, another day, to show you around my wine cellar. » Then addressing the ladies present: "Ladies, would you like to try this excellent wine? The four women gently refused. They did not want to disturb the cordial understanding that seemed to have developed between the two men. "Cathleen, ever since we arrived, I have been admiring these lovely tablecloths on the pedestal tables. The fabric is of such beautiful quality and the embroidery designs are exquisitely difficult! » Duncan's mother smiled broadly, "Dear Friend, I am proud to say that they are made in the French mill owned by my son. "Then, turning to the young man, she said, "Duncan, could you ask your partner to send Mrs. Butler several sets of tea towels to complement the large embroidered doilies?» Mrs. Butler politely declined at first, but was delighted with the gift to come. Rhett thought that the man in front of him was definitely resourceful. "Duncan - I think we can call each other by our first names. What do you think? "The other nodded. "I'd love to, Rhett! » He continued: "I am in awe of your Empire period furniture. At West Point, when we were taught the military strategy of the French Emperor, we sometimes made a foray into the study of Napoleon Bonaparte-influenced lifestyles and decorating style." Duncan was amazed at the similarities between them. "It was my love for this great character that made me decide to decorate Magnolias' Mansion with an Empire feel, particularly influenced by the battles fought by General Bonaparte in the Egyptian Campaign**. Young Vayton added: "And I too began to admire Napoleon at West Point! What a happy coincidence, Rhett! We have the same artistic tastes, we're avid oenophiles and we've had similar training. I think we'll get along just fine! "Duncan gave Rhett his friendliest smile.

He continued: "Which regiment did you lead during the war? Perhaps we have crossed paths? » Rhett suddenly found himself on a ridge. To admit that he had only joined the Confederacy at the end when the South was about to lose - that famous night when he had abandoned Scarlett on the road to Rough and Ready? It might not look good for this new 'white knight in shining armour'. But he didn't care.  Goodness gracious! The great Rhett Butler was proud of his past, and he would impress the impetuous young man! "I was a blockade breaker. One of the best, I must humbly confess! "he assured them in a drawl so charming that the four women stopped their casual conversation to listen to his story. "I was in command of one of the largest steam-powered sidewheelers, the SS Lynx. It had a steel hull and  was 220 feet long***. But I changed a year later to a smaller, more malleable and much faster steamer, capable of dodging the Federal Navy. I was probably one of the first to be awarded the "letter of marque" signed by President Jefferson Davis, which attested to my service to the Confederacy. "Rhett gave his mother a mischievous smile. "A paper that would not have protected me from hanging if I had been captured by Federal forces. » Mrs Butler shuddered in retrospect. "Her dear daredevil of a son! » "The Yankee naval army had set up the "Anaconda Plan", a blockade belt encircling the Confederate states. The front line looked like a snake, running from Maryland up the Missouri River.*** And it was indeed an anaconda that strangled the Confederate states by preventing them from obtaining arms, getting supplies from Northern factories, receiving cargo from British ships, and being able to export their cotton production. »     Rhett the seducer was now mostly talking to Melina for the sake of impressing her. "What were you carrying? "asked the young Vayton, amazed to have an adventurous hero as a neighbour. "Mostly weapons for our Confederate Army, gunpowder, bullets for rifles, and mail too: in our own way, we were in the front line of the fighting! » "We would have to sail along the coast at night, using indians tricks to get into the harbour and fool the Union ships! "Rhett's eyes glistened at the excitement and fear that gripped the entire crew as they approached the danger. Cathleen Vayton also found herself transported by the exploits of the former blockade breaker: "How many times have you managed to get through the lines? » "Thirty-three times! My first arrival in Nassau was on 5 December 1861. We were loading cargoes from England, filled with guns, lead, meat, saltpetre, shoes, blankets, coffee, and also the more luxurious items of clothing and sewing, necessary for your daily life, dear ladies! » "The transfer points, between the ships coming from England and us taking over the cargo, were from Nassau. Then we sailed to the ports of Wilmington, Charleston and Savannah. On the return trip to Nassau, the planters would entrust us with their cotton production, which would then make the crossing in English freighters. »

"The hull of my little steamer was painted grey to make it as inconspicuous as possible offshore. Duncan, did you know that when we were approaching the coast we used to feed the boiler with anthracite coal instead of coal so that the smoke would be white and dissolve on the horizon? I have even used cotton soaked in turpentine to raise the heat and substantially increase the speed. Rhett's eye twitched as he thought of these anecdotes. "We had to use indians tricks, I tell you! » Duncan looked at his quiet neighbour in a new light. "I met some brave men, who were not afraid of anything. You've probably heard of the famous Josiah Gorgas, who also graduated from West Point. He was my friend. » Duncan admired Rhett Butler's valour. "It is true! The Cause has paid tribute to those brave blockade-breakers who braved machine-gun fire and the beaching of their ships to relieve us of Yankee asphyxiation. However, it is regrettable that some took advantage of this to enrich themselves by not giving priority to supplying our troops. I remember a certain Butler - one of your namesakes,  Rhett - with whom I was in business to repatriate a shipment of military jackets and trousers made at my expense in my French factory. His transport prices were prohibitive. I had tried to make him understand by special mail that these uniforms would be used to protect our soldiers from the rigours of the rain and the cold, but nothing was could change his mind! He shamelessly told me that I had to accept his price because the cargo space available on his ship was very coveted. » Duncan gave a disillusioned pout at the memory. Rhett got up from his seat. He looked straight at the former Lieutenant-Colonel: "It was me, Captain Rhett Butler! »     Startled eyes stared at him. "You? You’re disappointing me, Mr Butler. I thought we shared the same values. After this revelation, I'm not so sure..." Rhett was not disconcerted by this sudden reversal of cordial understanding. "Times were tough. One third of the available space on our ships was legally reserved for the transport of cotton, so that the economy would not collapse*** - which it did. I had to feed my crew and make a profit from these expeditions where our lives were threatened at every moment. I do not regret my choices. I take responsibility for them. » Chin up, his imposing stature extended, Rhett stared defiantly at Duncan. The former benefactor of the Cause just didn't know how to respond. The ladies present became aware of the sudden change in atmosphere. The tension between the two men had become tangible. To distract and inject some levity, Melina brought up her favourite subject: "This place is a real paradise, but for our dear Mum's joy to be complete, we need something more. » Cathleen wondered, "What are you thinking, girl? » "To children's laughter, of course! "The young Vayton was pleased with her effect. "Isn't it your dream to see your grandchildren running around the paths of our beautiful garden?" "Children's laughter..." Rhett felt a twinge of sadness. "No, he mustn't imagine his beloved Bonnie sharing the games of other children here. Or else he wouldn't be able to keep a straight face until the end of this reception. Mrs Vayton exchanged a knowing smile with Mrs Butler. "I hope this dream will soon become a reality thanks to our children! "Then her gaze fell on Duncan. He was still confused by his neighbour's revelation. "Why are you looking at me, Mother? I'm leaving it to Melina to ensure the Vayton descendants. When will you take a husband, my dear sister?" Melina blushed: "When I find my Prince Charming. "Then she jumped in: "You're the oldest. It's up to you to get married first. Are you ready to introduce us to the woman of your dreams? » Duncan was taken aback by his sister's questioning. "The woman of my dreams? A concept that never crossed my mind, I confess. "He chuckled. "In fact, I doubt very much if she exists! "In any case," he added, giving his sister a sly smile, "you'd be the first to know if I ever came across her. Let me tell you, I'm not about to introduce you to her! » Melina insisted, cuddling. "Make an effort, Big Brother. How will you recognize her? » He remained silent for a few moments, in deep introspection. Surprised by his own train of thought, he finally said in a hesitant voice:     "If she existed, I think I would know it immediately. Within the first few minutes. She would have a fiery temperament, a panther ready to purr or claw, soft skin..." Duncan paused abruptly, embarrassed by his indecent confidence, an admission of weakness made all the more awkward by the fact that it had been dropped in the presence of a man as impavid as Rhett Butler. Rhett, who had approached the piazza, froze. A succession of images assailed him: a library, a green muslin, a pearly shoulder, a broken vase, two emeralds, sparkles of anger... He closed his eyes to chase away the hallucinations that haunted him every night. In rage, he shoved his fists into his pockets. Melina looked at her brother in amazement: "Oh, you the hardened bachelor, are you in fact a passionate man ? You didn't accustom me and Mum to such lyricism!" She burst out laughing. The young man did not know what to say. For the first time, without his noticing it, he had put words to a fantasy that had never been consciously thought of before. "Don't get too excited, dear sister. In any case, this woman does not exist. » Melina then turned to the eldest son of the Butler family. "What about you, Rhett? Would you describe the woman of your dreams to me? Who knows, maybe your sister and I could find her among our friends .... What do you think Rosemary?" Her laughing eyes met the embarrassed faces of both the Butler women and her mother. "Melina, this is unseemly of you. "Cathleen sternly rebuked her, outraged that Rhett Butler's chaotic marital situation could be so cavalierly invoked. Then she turned to Rhett: "Mr Butler, I apologise for my daughter's indiscretion. Melina is as giddy as a child. In her defence, I must say she is an incorrigible romantic. » Her daughter then realised her blunder. She was clearly missing a piece of information that those present had. Eleonor Butler was silent, fearing a sarcastic reaction from her son. Duncan had lost interest in the subject and was enjoying his glass of wine. The heated argument of a few minutes ago was still bothering him. So he told himself he didn't give a damn about Rhett Butler's "dream woman. With that drawl he liked to use before he was about to make a hurtful remark, Rhett replied to Cathleen: "I see no offence in your dear daughter's innocent question. » Then, with a smirk that looked more like a sneer, he amused himself by staring at the young woman who was now blushing with confusion. "The dream woman? You should know, Miss Melina, that sometimes we have to take control of our dreams, to give up those that are futile. "Then his gaze drowned in the direction of the porch. His intonation froze the other four guests. The awkwardness that had crept in over the last quarter of an hour became overwhelming. It was time to end the tension. "Cathleen, I'm sure you're exhausted from moving in. It is now time for us to take our leave and for you to rest. The warm welcome you have given us in your beautiful mansion is very special to me. We shall both see you next week. Good evening to you, my dear Eleonor, your lovely daughter and the talented Duncan! » That evening, two neighbours who could have been friends were not sad to part... ****

Endnotes to Chapter 7 *My sources of information on the cotton economy and textile mills in the USA in 1870 are based on Louis Reybaud's thesis published in 1870, "L'Industrie et les Ouvriers du Coton aux États-Unis depuis la guerre de secession", Revue des Deux Mondes, 2nd period, volume 90, 1870. **Directoire, 1795-1799: government that succeeded the period of the French Revolution. The Directoire style of furniture extends to 1803. - Egyptian Campaign: battles led by General Bonaparte from 1798 to 1801 - "Return from Egypt": term characterising the style of ornamentation - Empire, 1804-1815: General Bonaparte was crowned Emperor Napoleon Bonaparte. - Empire style furniture, from 1803 to 1821. ***Blockade Breakers during the American Civil War: source Wikipedia. Disclaimers : I do not own the story and characters of Gone with the Wind which belong to Margaret Mitchell. The “world” of Duncan Vayton and Blanche Bonsart are my creation.

[isenstar777]

So I was tagged by @searchingfortheuniverse ​(ages ago)! Thank you!

Tag nine people with excellent taste: (only if you want to, of course!)

@lunacornfan2k21 @hesitating-anxious-aliens @dawnandpiplup @kateleshan @stardustloki @nutellabiddy32 @fuckyeahdeafandasexual @fy-nghariad-fy-emrys @vakariannyx

Colours I’m currently wearing: mostly blues and blacks with some purple

Last band I saw live: No idea. Probably the band at Beaumaris Food Festival in 2016. I’m not great with live.

Last song I listened to: Venice Rooftops from Assassin’s Creed 2. It was my alarm for a lecture which I just kept listening to until the song was finished

Lipstick or chapstick: neither, really. At a push, chapstick because it’s useful beyond aesthetics

Last movie I watched: The Monuments Men

Last three shows I watched: Best Celebrity Home Cook, Schitt’s Creek, Leverage

Last three characters I identified with: Tiffany Aching (Discworld), Daine Sarrasri (Immortals Quartet), Dax Jones (Shapeshifter series)

Books I’m currently reading: Crown of Midnight by Sarah J Maas (re-read), Emperor Mage by Tamora Pierce (re-read), Southern Gaul and the Mediterranean: Multilingualism and Multiple Identities in the Iron Age and Roman Periods by Alex Mullen (uni work).

[duskglass]

Know any new good Jak and Daxter fanfiction? I'm getting back to it and it feels like I read all the good ones already

notes: all listed fics are Complete unless otherwise noted, and the two Ongoing ones are both recently & actively updating (ie, none of these are abandoned or hiatused). i've also included my own fics as well! i don't normally advertise my fanfic writings on this blog but i figured they're worth a mention too :D

Wayward Sons by Duskglass - Damas & Daxter team up to rescue Jak after he was captured by marauders! lots of action, family bonding, and just a bit of Dad Humour. (ongoing; 4 chapters planned; 2019)

Cascade by Duskglass - big AU where Jak gets stuck in darkmode & has to navigate the events of renegade while looking like a Horrible Demon Monster! featuring lots of exploration of canon themes/settings and a gradual divergence from the in-game plot. (ongoing; 26 chapters planned in pt1 + future sequels; cw for graphic wounds; 2019)

Salvage by Rhinozilla - inexperienced civillians in Haven try to use green eco after a metalhead attack and it goes Horribly Wrong; Keira & Samos & Jak have a lot of work on their hands trying to patch up the victims. (featuring some really cool eco hcs! cw for body horror & graphic wounds; 2018)

What Hides in the Depths by Rhinozilla - Jak and Dax encounter a familiar old enemy in the waters outside Haven City while on a mission at the pumping station. (2018)

Rebuild by Athena_Crikey - Torn works to keep the KG together after Praxis's death. (a new fic by the author of City Boys, which was the very first JnD fic i ever read & still one of my top Torn-centric recs!)

Approval of a Sandking by Meeko - Dadmas & Daxter, my favourite underutilised dynamic!!! set post-3 in a human!dax + dadmas lives au, Dax returns from a mission in the wasteland with some minor injuries & talks with Damas. (2017)

City of Light by Weiila - a Sig-centric story set post-X, where Rayn gets some dirt on him and blackmails him into working for her new criminal syndicate in Kras. (also au where Damas is alive & Dax is human again; 2017)

Exile by Duskglass - oneshot about how Damas and Sig first met, set roughly 20 years pre-canon! (originally posted earlier; new content added as of 2017)

Commander by Varethane - Torn leaves the KG; it doesn't go well. (cw for mob violence & graphic injury; 2015)

Give an Ottsel a Missile by Distantglory - Daxter & Jak & Torn friendship fic, set during the ‘Dax rides the missile’ mission in jak3. (2015)

Strain by Varethane - Jak overloads on dark eco and it's bad for everyone involved; set during renegade. (2015)

Introspective Hero by Weiila - jak3 AU where Dax becomes human again & slowburny jaxter ensues; I'd consider this more action/plot-centric than romance tho, with truly wonderful supporting OCs and an excellent dadmas arc!! my top fav Longfic in this fandom ♡ (ok i know this one was already around way back in the day, but the conclusion still falls into the recentish timeframe of this list)

______annnd I'm gonna toss in my older dadmas favs too, just in case they were missed!! because I honestly can't rec these ones enough:

A Warrior's Way Of Life by Bookwrm389 - Damas & Jak get abducted by aliens Dark Makers and have to fight their way off the spaceship before it departs!

Spartacus Now by Weiila - Jak & Dax hear a story about the time Damas got captured by marauders (alternates between flashbacks of the Action and the duo hearing about it in present-day from various storytellers)

Weathering the Storm by Bookwrm389 - super cute oneshot about Damas and Jak having a mudfight with some Spargan kids! Damas being a silly nerd is my favourite thing ;3;

______((also, usual disclaimer that this is just what i personally enjoy! i prefer gen overall & have a ton of notps in this specific fandom so.... keep that in mind i guess? tho i assume you sent me this ask because my JnD fanart appeals to you– i def look for many of those same themes in fic!))

[douxreviews]

Star Trek: Deep Space Nine - ‘Sons of Mogh’ Review

"You took away my honor and only you can give it back."

While the Klingon Empire stoops to deceit in their march towards all-out war, Worf is visited by a family member who taxes his sense of connection to two very different worlds.

The thing which separates Deep Space Nine, for me, from the run of the mill (and even from other Treks)  is how it constantly weaves in events from the past and shapes them into a journey for the future. The exciting thing is how this is done on multiple levels. Take the context for this episode's Plot B. We're learning about Klingon behavior since leaving the Federation. Predictably, they're getting ready for war; unpredictably, they're doing so with deception by laying mines all along the border between Cardassia and Bajor in a manner which would leave the Bajoran group trapped. This goes against the historical notions of Klingon honor, while giving lip service to that honor itself.

I felt that this was a sort of parallel between our main characters for the Plot A of this episode. Worf and his brother are both products of Klinzhai, they are both extremely connected to the warrior tradition. I mean, isn't that why Worf and Dax have so much steamy sexual energy? How many times have we seen Dax speaking Klingon? She joined Klingon warriors in a vendetta back in season two (and "Blood Oath" also started out with a drunken Klingon). Dax embraces warrior culture and Klingon culture, and Worf sees in Dax, I think, a confusing mirror image of Worf, a mix of Federation and Klingon culture. For Dax, a Trill, it's perhaps easier or expected to move between cultures in such a way. I do not think it comes as easily to Worf.

But it's that very internal division between Federation and Klingon culture which causes the major problem of this episode. Once Worf rejected Gowron in "The Way of the Warrior" at the beginning of this season (and what a change that was after TNG) his family was left in disgrace, lost power, and wound up drowning in a pit of dishonor. Kurn shows up drunk on Deep Space Nine and begs for an honorable death. It's clear from the beginning that Worf also has extremely deep feelings for his brother. Now, we can discuss this as you will, but I think when Worf agreed to provide that honorable death, that agreement was about more than just giving Kurn honor. By proxy, Worf was also killing himself and his connection to the Federation, just as (later in the episode) Kurn sets up a security-related event to set up his own death, and the ship's crew in Plot B set up their own destruction through the planting of dishonorable hidden mines. When Dax takes a few random words from Quark and pieces together that Worf is about to use adanji to prepare for the ceremony of Mauk to'Vor, a ritual honor killing, she immediately runs to interfere. Given her knowledge of Klingon culture, and her clear feelings for Worf, is it that much of a reach to think she was running to save the precarious balance of Worf's soul?

Add yet another layer. While Worf's brother lives, Kurn needs guidance and support to live – and he's depending fully on Worf for that. Worf does pretty much everything he can think of – including going into debt to Odo to get Kurn a job in security – but without any connection to the Federation Kurn just gets into more and more trouble. He tries to suicide-by-criminal (a unique version of suicide-by-cop.) When Worf confronts him and talks about honor, what's interesting is that Kurn also finds the action of the Klingon Empire dishonorable. Kurn voted against Klinzhai withdrawing from the Federation. Worf's rejection of Gowron wasn't the only reason the sons of Mogh are in the pickle they are now. Kurn doesn't seem willing to accept his own part in their dishonor, and his own guilt, and he's stopped from suicide only by the tenets of the Klingon warrior culture which has rejected him.

The episode's ending was bitter, bitter, bitter for me. To sacrifice a brother in soul to save the brother's body, I don't know if that's something I'd agree to. Even worse, to do it without Kurn's explicit consent seems a little like a kind of rape. But without the drastic step of erasing his brother's memory and giving him a new family, Worf sees clearly, Kurn's days are numbered. Again, this was Dax's idea – and while it's a horrible, horrible idea, it might be the one pathway that allows Worf to live with himself. And the result? Kurn lives as someone else's son, and the Sons of Mogh are separated again.

Is Worf still a Klingon?

By my lights, he's definitely still Klingon. It's not that he's left that world behind. It will forever be a part of him. What's happening to Worf is that his sense of honor is becoming more, not less, refined. Worf claims he's losing the warrior instincts of a Klingon. I claim he's choosing to give people the opportunity to show their own honor. Worf claims he's rejected Klinzhai and Klingon culture. I think he's embraced the honorable part of that culture – but over the years and two separate series, he's seen the dark side of Klingon culture, the deceit and the Romulan- or Cardassian-like plotting, and he rejects it. If I had to choose a parallel for Worf, it might be G'Kar from Babylon 5 – except Worf doesn't seem to have G'Kar's ability to express himself.

Bits and Pieces

I learned more about Klingon weapons in this episode. I think it's telling that of all characters Worf is okay with a smaller weapon because he doesn't need the confidence boost!

Tony Todd is back! Before, he was Jake. Now, he's Kurn. I honestly appreciated his excellent acting in both episodes.

Kira and O'Brien have some lovely moments in the plot B of this episode, especially when they set off those mines and flush out enemy ships. Kira looks like a warrior, too.

Sisko has no choice but to reject the ritual. In this episode, he's representing the Federation side completely, but I am not sure he wants to. Great acting here.

Quotables

Dax: So you think that I was overconfident? Worf: You were overconfident. You thought by distracting me with your outfit you would gain an advantage. Dax: My outfit? Worf: Er, I thought that–I mean, I only assumed that– Dax: You thought I wore this for you? Talk about overconfidence. (She turns away and smiles)

Quark: No, this was more than his standard rudeness. He came in here, ordered some Klingon incense and nearly threw me across the bar when I tried to give him some replicated incense. Dax: What kind of Klingon incense? Quark: Something called adanji. Dax: Why would he want adanji? Quark: Why? Is there something special about adanji? (Dax walks away) That's it. I'm going to stop talking to the customers.

Kurn: Did you fight them? Did you threaten to kill them both if they interfered? And are you standing here now with the mevak dagger ready to slit my throat and bring me the death I deserve? No. For a moment in your quarters during the ritual you were Klingon. But your Federation life has claimed you again and now it is claiming me as well. I have no life. I have no death. Whatever is to become of me is up to you.

Overall

As some of you know, this is my first time watching this series. I had a hard time sleeping after watching this episode. I hope to god Worf is okay.

Five out of five psychological and physical land mines.

---

JRS

[thesffcorner]

Toy Story 4

Toy Story 4 is, as the title suggests, the fourth instalment in the Pixar animated series, directed by Josh Cooly. Following the events of 3, Woody and the rest of the toy gang is now in the possession of Bonnie. When Bonnie has her first day of preK, her only comfort is making Forky; a toy made out of a spork and ice cream sticks. Forky quickly becomes her favorite toy but there is just one problem; Forky thinks he’s trash and he makes it his mission to get back into the trash, making Woody’s job to keep him safe and Bonnie happy, that much more difficult.

I was vaguely aware that a new Toy Story was coming out, but up until the moment I saw it, I hadn’t even seen a trailer. I found that the way 3 ended was a perfect conclusion to the franchise, and while I wasn’t opposed to a new film, I just couldn’t see what kind of story they could tell that would further the characters’ development.

Well, shame on all of us who thought that, because this film is amazing. It is so good, I can confidently say it’s the same quality of storytelling as 2, with the added bonus of the animation being EXTREMELY well done and amazing. This is a top notch film, not just the best sequel of any franchise, but easily one of the best films of the year.

Let’s talk animation. Incredibles 2 proved how far Pixar had come in terms of animation quality, but this film blows the Incredibles out of the park. The attention to detail in this is staggering; I absolutely loved how lovingly rendered every character was. The amount of detail in the reflection on Bo Peep’s porcelain textures, on Woody’s face, the fur and hair textures, and especially the facial expressions. So much is being delivered just by the expressions of the characters; there are entire scenes that are entirely quiet, the characters simply emoting, and they are so effective.

More than just the incredible amount of detail, the set pieces in this film are amazing. It blends slapstick comedy, action and even horror so effectively, and the animation team excels at all of it.

This series has never shied away from horror, but this is absolutely the most effective it’s been so far. The choice of villain, the creepy way the ventriloquists look and move, the jump scares and music stings all work so well together, and more than once people in my theatre screamed like they would in a genuine horror film.

As for the action pieces, they are top notch. There are so many good scenes I don’t even know which one is the standout; the entire ending set piece is great, blending comedy, action and emotion perfectly, but I think the scene people will most remember is definitely the break into the antique store; everything in it, from the character development, to the comedy to the chase scene with the ‘Dragon’ is amazing.

From what I know, this is Cooly’s first feature film debut, and this man will be a legend if he keeps it up. The way he stages and executes scenes speaks of a confidence and skill that few first timers can muster, especially with the complexity of the scenes and the budget.

But what about the story? Well, that’s pretty great too.

Wisely, Cooly tells this film as a set of smaller vignettes; there are at this point so many characters in these films that it’s impossible to cover all of them at once. That’s the one complaint I do have for this film: veterans like Slinky, Mr. and Mrs. Potato Head, Rex, and even Jesse, Bullseye and Buzz almost feel like they are extras in their own film. This isn’t to say they have absolutely nothing to do, but they have significantly less screen time, and the focus is definitely on the newcomers.

The story here is solely focused on Woody, and his struggle to accept his place in the world, now that he is no longer with Andy. His relationship to Andy is genuinely the most interesting part of his character; he is devoted and loyal to this child that he watched grow up, and no one can measure up to him. This isn’t to say he’s not trying; he clearly loves Bonnie, and cares for her, but he struggles to accept that she isn’t Andy.

When Forky was introduced, I was afraid I would find him annoying, but he’s a pretty great character. I enjoyed his relationship to Woody and Gaby Gaby; he doesn’t understand what he is, where he comes from or even what he’s meant to be; the scene where Woody explains why he’s so important to Bonnie was really sweet and kind of profound.

But the real stand outs in this film are not Woody nor Forky; no, that honor goes to Bo Peep and Gaby Gaby. I always liked Bo Peep, and I was really upset that the last film had her disappear and acknowledge her departure with a single throwaway line. However, Cooly fixes that here, because she is a main character, and gets so much development. We find out exactly when she left and how, and then we encounter her again, years later. She is now a scavenger, a lost toy helping other lost toys find a child to play with. She has lived through a lot; I really liked the bit about her having various chips in her body, like a severed arm as proof.

Her relationship with Woody is also really sweet and well developed. They are very similar and yet opposite; Bo’s focus is on the other toys, and helping them, while Woody’s is on the child, be it Andy or Bo, and they are both so passionate about these things, that their passion takes them in opposite directions. It was heartbreaking to watch them struggle against this, and I shouldn’t be surprised that the same people who gave us the Jesse scene in 2, can wring this much angst out of the relationship between a porcelain shepherd and a plastic cowboy, and yet here we are.

As for Gaby Gaby, she was amazing. Christina Hendricks does an amazing job with Gaby’s voice and she is at once incredibly sinister and terrifying and sweet and really pitiful. I don’t want to spoil her character, but she was by far the best villain this series has had so far, with the most sympathetic and understandable motivations, and I loved the way her story progressed. It helped that she reminded me a lot of Baby Doll from Batman TAS.

And of course, I have to give an honorable mention to Key and Peele’s characters Dax and Nax. They were absolutely hilarious and I loved their dynamic both between each other and with the other characters. They have 3 scenes that are so funny I had tears in my eyes, and I don’t doubt they will be what people clip and put on youtube.

Overall, go see this movie. It’s funny, it’s emotional, it’s gorgeously animated, and it’s hands down the best sequel of the year; you won’t regret it.

[vaguely-concerned]

IN ANTICIPATION OF BIOWARE POTENTIALLY GIVING US A ROMANCE UPDATE IN THE FUTURE: MY PERSONAL ANTHEM ‘SHOULD YOU FUCK’s AS OF RIGHT NOW, ENORMOUS SPOILERS OBVIOUSLY

No really spoilers for Anthem you have been warned

Tassyn: I mean she reads a lot more mom to me, but I’ve seen people be into her so y’know if that floats your boat go ahead. Probably will regretfully yet efficiently murder you if necessary but hey some people are into that I’m not judging. 

Rythe: FUCK YEAH YOU SHOULD FUCK RYTHE! SEXY BAD CHOICES ALL AROUND!!!! *fingerguns*

Owen: Well I love him & would die for him even after the total bullshit he pulls, but to me he feels more like a fuckup little brother, in the grand tradition of Carver and Jowan. So for me personally that’s probably a no, but I can totally see why you would and I respect it. They played their hand too early with him b/c the pacing of the main story is completely off the rails, so I’d love to get more content for him anyway. He’s undeniably hilarious and desperate for affection and can be sweet but he’s also a walking over-caffeinated mess of abandonment issues, deflecting humour and spectacularly bad decisions; will absolutely stab you in the back but tbf you kind of treated him horribly. Even I have to admit that that slouch and slow grin when he sees you in the bar sure was Something, though I’m not entirely sure what. If you were one of those people who inexplicably wanted to kiss Wheatley, lo and behold your time has come.

I would say that if you haven’t previously engaged in the even grander Bioware tradition of getting screwed over in the non-sexy way by your love interest, ala Anders and Solas... step with caution, okay? (If you’ve been here before, seen this room and walked this floor -- you know what you’re doing, I’m not here to insult you by giving you advice like you’re not marching unflinchingly into hell with open eyes yet again, best of luck out there in the trenches comrade)

Dax: Oh hell yeah you should fuck Dax. Strong, beautiful, funny, driven, technically a princess and heir to the throne but so far along in the line of succession now that neither of you have to worry about getting assassinated, probably, will make you excellent and detailed maps one day. Good stuff.

Haluk: No he is my honorary uncle and mentor it would be super weird. He has beautiful eyes tho A fucking plus to Bioware’s art/animation team there

Faye: Also feels like family, like my sister or something, so no. She’s objectively the prettiest girl in the entire game, however, and super smart and kinder than her dumbass friends have any right to expect of her, so if I played a different character: totally.

Brin: ...idk I just sort of get the feeling she’s got other shit to do and wouldn’t welcome it? I’d be her fanfic beta reader tho, which is arguably a greater degree of intimacy anyway ETA: Apparently she’s ace, so definitely doubling down on betaing fic instead!

The Matthiases: Short answer: Probably yeah, if you feel so inclined, it’ll be fun if a bit of a mindfuck. Long answer: GOD PLEASE FUCK THE MATTHIASES, this is literally the reason I made this post, the mechanics of it alone! The Possibilities! Like how would it work? For Science if nothing else, people!

(I know the point of their arcs is kind of that they’re separate people now and romancing all three of them at once is probably not how that would work but honestly when has that ever stopped the smut brain? Never, of course, let’s go)

Do we check our calendars for when we can all manage to get together every time? Do we add the arcanist lady who Sumner could end up dating (of course we do the more the merrier when we’ve let it get to this point)? Do you pick one to fit your mood that day -- Matti for days when you need someone who sounds a little stoned to tenderly look you in the eyes and earnestly tell you you’re a wonderful person, Sumner for rough satisfying stuff but also he can be kind of adorbs?, Erryl for when you want to try some technically challenging kama sutra shit but don’t feel like chatting about feelings? (you know there are books about it in the Anthem universe too and you know he’s always up for an experiment) Would you just pick and mix and would they be chill with that?

Have the three of them together ever, you know. I mean, they live together. They conceivably share a bedroom. They must have -- surely, they’ve at least tried... right? At least once.There’s no way they haven’t. Right? To satisfy Erryl’s intellectual curiosity, if nothing else? Well, it’s something to consider. Fuck them, is what I’m saying, it’ll be an adventure and between the three of them they can give you the time and attention the original Matthias couldn’t b/c he was all arcanisty and self absorbed.  

The Monitor: You Monitor fuckers already know who you are and I’m perfectly aware that neither I nor the hand of god himself could stop you if we wanted to, godspeed you weirdos

Princess Zhim: She’s so beautiful I’m a bit weak in the knees but she made you eat a pheromone sack with disgusting sound effects the first time you met. I mean. If that’s your thing you’re welcome to but that’s a no thanks from me. 

Amal: Nah. He’s such a disastrous ditz he might like frame you for murder one day without even meaning to or realizing. Also the worst kind of actor -- working as a waiter for now until he gets his big break but just you wait one day he’ll be a star and uuuuuugh... listen if you can block out the inane prattle for long enough to enjoy his pretty face all the more power to you, but I don’t have that kind of strength of character

Lucky Jak: Sure, have fun! Boy looks good in a tight sweater and seems nice. ETA: Also actually now that I think about it he could & would totally do all your paperwork for you, literally the dream man, go forth and smooch at will

Kassian: Yes, for no other reason than that I literally thought ‘yeah I’d bang him’ the first time I saw him even though he’s wearing whatever the hell it is he’s wearing on his head, so that’s some serious magnetism he’s got going on there. A little bit of an ‘a freelancer can love a caravan sailor merchant person but where would they live’ situation if you go for a long term thing, but I’m sure you could work something out. “I’d like to kiss you”, “...KS?”, “Nope, that one’s totally true as long as you’d like that too”, honestly the dialogue writes itself

Marl: No. He’s already clearly having some sort of Situation with Gunther and honestly... leave them to it, nothing but madness lies this way

Pirndel: Eh it’ll be deeply unsatisfying, but I bet he practices extremely safe sex. Not the worst choice.

That married couple I can’t remember the names of right now but they’re both spies: They’ve already enough of an unexpected bizarre threesome angle going on and I’m not sure a non-spy is equipped for the mind games enough to not end up dead, let’s not 

Max: Well she also already has a wife, but you never know how they’ve got things arranged. Never hurts to ask.

Commander Vule: Very good voice. Handsome. Stern but fair-ish; you could roleplay by-the-book-cop vs. wild card detective and finally get to yell ‘but I get results, Chief’, maybe hand in your badge and gun while he glowers at you... You know yourself best, my friend, bang or not as you see fit. 

Neeson: No. He will end up wearing your skin as a coat if you let him. Save yourself.

[doomedandstoned]

Mollo Rilla Take Us On A Rock ‘n’ Roll Odyssey

~Doomed & Stoned Debuts~

Let's just say this isn't what I was expecting...at all. And that's a good thing these days. It takes a lot to stand out in the mushrooming field of stoner rock. One way to really set apart your sound? The synthesizer. It makes all the difference in this, the eponymous full-length by Cleveland rockers MOLLO RILLA. Opening track "Ego" reminded me of what Blade Runner's Los Angeles must be like underground, where all the replicants go to party.

At times, Simeon Ruple's keys sound space-age ("Nectar"), at other times downright creepy ("Nightmare"), and still other times they give us a nice throwback to the heyday of the instrument in the '60s, '70s, and early-'80s ("Ghetto Ghoul"). Of course, none of this would work with a bouncy rhythm section (bassist Austin Adams and drummer Ben Cunningham operate like clockwork), a bitchin' riff game (guitarist Marco Ciofani), and those oh-so-cool vocals (also frontman Marco, backed by Simeon and Austin). This is a band I'd love to see live, maybe even take a skeptical friend with me -- you know, one of those who has their favorite bands set in stone from 10 years ago. I bet Mollo Rilla could win 'em over.

If you're a fan of bluesy, sassy, desert-style stoner rock in the vein of Kyuss and QOTSA, you'll find plenty to love here, with or without the synth (try "Holy Water" for starts, then move on to "End Times Preacher," then maybe "Pyramids" and "Odyssey"). The band is equally comfortable in the world of shoegaze and psychedelia, too (the dreamy "Ascension," for instance, which could be the perfect B-side companion to Nirvana's "Big Long Now").

There are plenty more surprises in store on the album, such as the lilting "Flowers" -- a narcotic slow dance that seems bound for a movie soundtrack. The singing feels like a throwback to the classic crooners of the '50s and I love that more and more of this style is finding its way into contemporary heavy music.

Today, Doomed & Stoned is bringing you an advance listen to 'Mollo Rilla' (2019), which releases on vinyl and digital formats May 3rd via Seeing Red Records (get it here).

Give ear...

MOLLO RILLA by Mollo Rilla

Some Buzz

Mollo Rilla is a rock band formed in 2017 from a group of guys leaving other bands. Their core mission: musical freedom and damn good rock music. The group enjoys blending other styles in with their American rock beats, such as Latin guitar and even disco. They write about freedom, fantasy, faith, and of course LOVE.

The members are Marco Ciofani (vocals, lead guitar), Simeon Ruple (Keyboard, backup vocals), Austin Adams (bass, backup vocals), and Ben Cunningham (drums). These Ohio boys grew up in Geauga County, just east of Cleveland. Their rustic childhood becomes evident in their lyrics whether it’s picking up beers with friends, or driving down a country road.

Mollo Rilla effortlessly combine a multitude of styles in the Rock n' Roll category resulting in what sounds most comparable to Queens of the Stone Age, Muse, or one of Jack White's many projects. While that is a general statement attempting to give you minor insight into what lies within, the album is much more complex than that.

The QOTSA influence is easy to identify, but there are others hidden within that are more subtle or rather utilized more sparsely. At times, Marco's haunting vocal delivery brings to mind one of my favorite vocalists Dax Riggs (Acid Bath, Agents of Oblivion, Deadboy and the Elephantman), although the music never sounds quite like anything Dax has ever really explored.

And while the album is more firmly set in the "Rock" category than anything "Metal," all of Mollo Rilla's tunes harbor a dark vibe in some fashion. There are also glimpses into a more "Garage rock" vibe reminding me of raucous Detroit City Rock legends, the MC5, and maybe it's their use of keys, but there are also flashes in time that are heavily Deep Purple influenced.

The album is truly a journey, and while not every song is an A+, the band have truly created an album, a true album that weaves wonderfully together like their many '70s influences achieved. Whether you are a fan of stoner-doom, garage rock, or any form of hard rockin' rock 'n' roll, there is something in this album for you.

Fans of everything from Uriah Heep to the more modern Imperial State Electric (or any of Nicke's bands for that matter) will find enjoyment in this record. The band are going to turn a lot of heads, and due to their excellent balance of styles, I see them appealing to a multiple of fans, metal and rock alike

Follow The Band

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[replicarters]

i was at northeast trek con this weekend, if you couldn’t deduce it from my posts that must have sounded like they were coming from some sort of hallucinatory trip. to say i had fun would be a wild understatement. if you slot this con on an alignment chart, it would be wall-to-wall chaotic good. the theme advertised was celebrating the 25th anniversary of ds9... and boy did we celebrate.

what follows is everything i feverishly tweeted about the wildest 72 hours of my life.

the only reason i went to this con at all was @thylekshran, who wanted to see one mr. jeffwey combs very badly. @jadziadax happened to say to me one night, “hey you should go to this con happening where you live to see nicole,” and i said, “wait a minute, isn’t this the con dylan wants to go to? what if i actually Did go to this?”

friday: i grabbed dylan, somehow, from the bus stop that i think didn’t quite exist on this plane. we get to the con and we walk into the exhibit hall. nicole is right by the door and i cannot look at her, so we beeline for vendor tables, and suddenly before me is an extremely familiar spread of colorful images. it takes me a minute to process it, and then i’m pointing to this table and rushing toward it going, “OH MY GOD. IT’S HER! FROM TUMBLR! OH MY GOD WHAT.” it was none other than @abravenoise selling prints!!!! i had no idea she would be there since i didn’t look at anything before i left the house. just fyi she is irl just about the nicest person i’ve ever met!!!!!! and i’m so glad we got to hang out as much as we did!

we spent the day mostly going to panels and being big baby chickens regarding jeff’s and nicole’s tables, respectively. we did end up at jg hertzler’s table A Lot, because dylan, like, is recognized?? by him and his wife??? idk dylan’s just out here charming the pants off everybody, so i was like, okay cool, this is the first thing that is Totally Fine, just chilling with martok. we also met two cool dudes through jg who really enjoyed hanging out with us, and that was great! making friends all over the place! not the first and not the last!

one thing dylan and i were bummed about was that the klingon meet & greet party that night (where jg and robert o’reilly would get in costume as martok and gowron and duel to the death) was sold out. we really really really wanted to go... so dylan just... straight up asks jg if he can get us in dhfklshdfd. and you know what? he fucking does. just... put our names right on that list! O K A Y!

the friday panels were a sign of what would be to come, every one we went to was crazy. this was my first real trek con, so of course i have never seen hertzler and o’reilly in a room together, but now i have and my third eye is open and all that. not to mention: learning that garrett wang plays pokemon go, nicole cracking up at poop jokes like i said, hertzler doodling a little shran with glasses on jeff’s sign, the con’s power point file just being named DRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR. everything that was happening was so good.

chase masterson had a panel about her pop culture hero coalition, and currently working for a non-profit myself, i was really curious about what kinds of programming they do, so i went to her table to talk to her about it. chase ended up talking some about the why’s of starting the coalition, what it meant to her, her own struggles with depression, and i’m thinking to myself, “uhhhhhh well if chase is gonna share about her mental health struggles, then... i... will also do this.” the nanosecond i said something about experiencing difficulty with self-love, she was zeroed in on me like a cruise missile. i spilled everything to her about my job and how my old boss was basically the meanest, most miserable person alive, and how much she got into my head and how now that i was out of that department, i had to pick up the pieces and it was proving to be much harder than it has been in the past. well, god almighty, chase just had the nicest things to say in return, and we commiserated over being your own worst critic, and how ridiculously hard it is to have this fight against yourself over and over again, but that we deserve so much and going forward is worth it. jesus christ! i got a big hug and said to myself, “holy shit i can’t wait to tell my therapist that a star trek actor talked to me about mindfulness and now i want to learn the hell out of it.”

oh but then it was time for the klingon party that we were now going to thanks to jg hertzler. this thing was off the chain immediately, martok and gowron had their duel, first with sparkling bat’leths that fell apart, and then with whole baguettes, and i can’t believe i got to watch this with my eye parts. and that was the beginning; the party would go for another 3 hours, almost all of which i spent dancing with the most generous people i’ve ever met, who went out of their way to welcome everyone they could onto the dance floor, regardless of physical ability or skill level. there was one woman in particular who, if she saw even the slightest twinkle in your eye and you weren’t already dancing with her, she’d be like, “you, get over here!” i don’t know how my body did that for all that time without falling apart.

our esteemed guests began showing up, and garrett wang leapt into the middle of our jump around circle and gave each one of us a vulcan high five. jeffrey combs showed up which of course sent dylan over the moon, and he said, “you go, girl!” to her dancing. max grodenchik gave dylan one of his drink tickets and then asked us whether or not we thought the existence of god could be proven. chase found us and reached out her hand over a couple people’s heads to give me a supportive hand squeeze (!!!???). aron eisenberg, i don’t know what the hell he was doing, but i feel like maybe somebody asked him about terry, because all of a sudden i hear something like, “terry left because she was in love with nog and couldn’t take it anymore.” garrett has three pokemon go accounts, which he showed off at my urging, and let me tell you, don’t encounter him at a gym because he has three dragonites, two tyranitars, a monster blissey, and god knows what else. dancing, dancing, more dancing. then it was time for it to be done, and time to go home. we watched reanimator. i was wired as hell and barely slept.

and THAT. was only friday.

saturday: i had kept my eyes open for a copy of the lives of dax the day before, but didn’t see anybody selling one. this morning, i walk by a booth we went to the previous day and all of sudden, on top of a bunch of other books in a big tub, there it was!!! couldn’t have forked my money over faster if i tried.

then i had this bright idea. hey... here’s a copy of lives of dax... and nicole is here... and she should sign it... and then in the future i can get terry to sign it... boom, bang, let’s do it, right? i had dylan drag me to nicole’s table because i was like, “i am never going to make even eye contact with her if you do not physically take me there,” and one of us brought up that we missed her at the klingon party. it’s cool, we all gotta sleep, right? well, it turns out nicole had gone out with the gaaays in spaaace people to the bar where they were going to have their party later. so she says garrett texts her, “uhhh hey you know you’re kinda supposed to be making an appearance at this thing, right?” nope! no clue. so she texts him back, “hmmm uhhh well,” takes another sip of her drink, “i think i’m doing good work here.”

the thing about nicole that i somehow missed in my drinking in of all ds9 actor content is that she embodies pure shitposter energy, but if the shitposts were coming from a wine mom. she’s hysterical, 50% intentionally and 50% unintentionally. an extremely excellent human. she signed lives of dax, i had my tribble photo op with her later (that i almost missed due to getting into a conversation with larry nemecek!) and she said she was going to the gays in space party later. helllll yes. i hope somebody puts up her q&a because she told a RIDICULOUS story about auditioning for ezri and creeping on jeri ryan on a plane. i can’t do it justice, there are movements that have to be seen.

we went to combsland finally, and i grilled him about whether or not herbert killed the cat, and we learned jeff has two cats! show them off, man! where are the vids! then, and i had never planned to do this, i bought an autograph from him, and the shran i bought it on ended up selling out! crazy.

hertzler had doodled a martok above his table, and so this combined with the little shran from yesterday led me to these words coming out of my mouth: “can i pay you for a drawing? can i pay you for a drawing of jadzia and martok brofisting?” he gave it very serious thought, said he was gonna have to look at a lot of pictures of terry (relatable), and told me to give him my e-mail. between him and his wife, i hope to god one of them remembers my e-mail is in his wallet. let me give you money!!!

my next tweets jump right to gays in space - again, dylan knows a lot of the gis folks, so i didn’t feel like i was going into this totally unawares. we’re chilling at the bar, i’m drinking my cranberry juice, and then o’reilly, aron, and nicole arrive, telling everybody that jg’s probably going to be late because a bouncer pushed his wife and he might go to jail. like, kidding, but also... it’s jg hertzler and he could legitimately fuck you up. so he was gonna be late, regardless.

nicole sees dylan and me and comes to say hello (????!!!!!) and somebody ends up saying, “get this lady a drink!” yeah, dylan and i were on that. in fact, i pulled my credit card out like i cared not one bit about identity theft, fico scores, my own personal finances; i would purchase this alcohol in an alley from a guy using a card skimmer. few minutes tick by and then i’ve officially bought a drink for nicole de boer (?????????!!!!!!!!) and i’m giving it to her (????????????????!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!) and we’re clinking our glasses together (?????????????????????????????????!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!) i’m clinking glasses with nicole fucking de boer and somehow managing to be normal about it. i’m not altogether convinced i didn’t exit the universe entirely by this point and end up in another one.

the gays in space party was AMAZING, it was just as fun as the klingon party! if you have a chance to go to one, please do, there’s like no way you could ever regret it. you get treated to star trek-themed drag shows, get to mingle, there was a raffle, the people were just as friendly as the previous day, it was so great. we were out very late for my old lady body clock but it was worth every bit of exhaustion we felt the next morning, after the saga of actually getting home past a blocked off road and dylan slicing herself open on the bottom of my passenger seat.

sunday: nicole sees me, mid-yawn, and gives me one of those, “eyyy you and me went through some shit last night huh?” looks and tells me good morning. ( ? ? ? ? ? ! !  ! you know this drill.) combs ended up on the escalator behind us after his panel and i turned around and i said to him, “hey jeff, you got any pictures of your cats with you?” (no, but he has a black cat and a very vocal calico.) i went to chase’s table again and got another hug right out of the gate, we took a pic together, and she told me i was powerful! yo! or rather yooooooooooooooooooo!

the con was winding down at this point, but there was one more thing left: jeopardy. the jeopardy game was done at the first northeast trek con and was so popular they did it again, and i really, really hope someone uploads it to youtube because it is beyond description. first of all, the whole draw were the contestants: you could enter a raffle to end up on either hertzler’s, aron’s, or garrett’s team. the champion from the last game ended up buying half the tickets, so he was on it again, and not on aron’s team, much to aron’s annoyance because god almighty did he want to win. he was about to commit murder in there. someone said nicole was upset that she wasn’t in the game because she really wanted to play, lmfao. so the guys running it were like, “well, go get her, she can be on garrett’s team!” which sent aron into a fucking tailspin. now we got a team with two people on it?! they got nicole and drew the other winners, and the game began. 

one of the rules was “this isn’t going to be fair. at all.” actually, it was two of the rules. despite this, you’d have thought aron was bitten by a rabid raccoon. every lost question almost got him flipping the table over. nicole belatedly, i’m talking like 5 minutes into it, realizes she doesn’t understand the rules of jeopardy and can’t figure out why “their” question was answered by someone else. she can’t believe someone knew what voyager’s registry number was. one of the questions was, “a young kid called ensign kim this name instead of ‘ensign’,” and with no hesitation, she answers, “asshole,” and wasn’t even joking, that was her actual guess.    R E A L    W I N E    M O M    H O U R S

the winner was hertzler and the previous champ. aron wants to ban the guy from buying tickets ever again. we head to the closing ceremony but it doesn’t happen? lmfao. well, guess the con’s over!

@abravenoise, one of our other con pals, and dylan were all taking the same bus that night, so we all went to grab dinner with two other guys, one who was a con pal and one i hadn’t encountered at all, and halfway through our dinner larry nemecek strolls in and sits down with us. things just keep happening, huh? the guy i hadn’t encountered at all was really impressed with me unhinging my jaw to consume my burger, and halfway through doing this i have to stop because he says, “hey, why the HECK did jadzia die?!” ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh here go hell come. my time to shine.

larry like looooves asking people what brought them to star trek, and this time he was asking us the -whys- of what brings us to star trek. i said the characters, for sure. he asked us about our favorites. i told him mine had changed throughout my life, but that when i was a kid, dr. crusher was my first favorite. he said, “in high school?” i said, “no, i mean, when i was REALLY little. like 4 or 5.” he asked me, “wow, have you ever met gates at a con and told her that?” pfft well, no, but first of all, now you got me wanting that, second of all i said what i really wanted was to swap cat pictures with her.

that was the end. i took everybody to their bus, went home, snuggled up in bed, and just asked myself, “what the fuck happened?” i still don’t know! but it was fun as hell, and amazingly impactful, if i’m being honest with you. i was surrounded by so many people brimming with enthusiasm, so many people who were happy. then there’s me, a curmudgeon who’s done everything in her power to stamp down her happiness all in the name of being ~cool or whatever. and it hasn’t made me very happy. i mean, i am also clinically depressed, there is that. but i’ve stopped sharing the things i enjoy with others, especially in recent years. i’ve closed myself off, mostly out of fear and attempting to survive my old job, but even here, i tend to keep myself at a distance, and i thought it was just because i’ve run the whole gamut of loving something before and just want to hang out with my friends. i think it’s more than that, though. i think it’s more of a defensive posture, and it’s that same posture which is running my life right now. it’s exhausting. this weekend wasn’t exhausting. it was in the sense that the human body needs rest and sleep and food and i wasn’t getting nearly enough of any of it, but emotionally, i was unburdened.

it would be nice to be that way all the time. i don’t know if it’ll be possible to be happy again like the people i met this weekend, but i do know that i want to experience this over and over and over again.

now, next time, maybe @rootmacklin and @jadziadax will be with me and we’ll be showing off our friendship necklaces to a very tall lady. that would be a good step toward unlocking my happiness...