#and like. im happy to do it i don’t want my family to be screwed. theyre good to me.

[daforged]

i work really hard to not compare myself to others but it’s so bizarre to me to see other people my age like. going out all the time or travelling or even just living on their own. what do you mean all your money goes to just your own living expenses & your own fun and you aren’t the financial backbone of your family. every time i take vacation days a coworker will ask me if i’m going somewhere and its like no lmfao do you think im made of money. i dont think about it much because it doesn’t really do anything but upset me but deep down im so resentful of every other young adult who doesn’t have to pay their parents bills and just gets to blow their money on whatever the fuck whenever the fuck

[fastandcarlos]

The Littlest Surprise » Daniel Ricciardo

caption: hello im a new f1 content creator and would love some feedback if you enjoy my fics tysm 🩷

summary: you’ve not been seen at the paddock for a while and the fans are getting worried, little do they know the reason for your absence is about to make everyone’s dreams come true

˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚＊

liked by schecoperez, georgerussell63 and 842,420 others

danielricciardo: always a pleasure to have the fam on my side, excited to show the little ones what uncle danny gets up to 🥺

49,302 comments

username1: is this yet another race y/n won’t be at this weekend??

username2: I cannot wait for the day that this man becomes a dad

username3: if y/n doesn’t hurry up and make him a dad…daniel i’m happy to offer my services 😊

maxverstappen1: how big is y/n/n now! she looks so grown up 🥺

danielricciardo: @/maxverstappen1 she’ll be 6 soon, where does the time go??

oscarpiastri: don’t forget your little adopted aussie nephew

landonorris: and your british nephew too!!

danielricciardo: @/oscarpiastri @/landonorris hey! i might be a bit older but not old enough to be your uncle thank you

username4: anyone else think something might be going on, daniel posting about his family without y/n there is strange

username5: @/username4 let’s not overthink this too much, y/n might just be busy

username4: @/username5 it’s been ages since we last saw her, you gotta admit it’s a bit sus

˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚＊

liked by lewishamilton, alex_albon and 629,301 others

danielricciardo: another great weekend of racing, nice feeling to be back on the podium…man how I missed hearing that champagne pop 🏎️

38,402 comments

charles_leclerc: congrats brother, nice to be up there with you once again

username6: y/n not distracting you anymore to stop you getting on the podium??

username7: @/username6 wtf? why would you suggest such a thing?

carlossainz55: always knew you’d be back up there one day, long may it continue!

yukitsunoda0511: you gotta give me some tips bro, those manoeuvres were lethal today 🔥

pierregasly: danny ric just doing danny ric things

˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚＊

liked by ynusername, charles_leclerc and 922,547 others

danielricciardo: hey team! just wanted to clear up some things after miami this weekend…me and y/n are absolutely fine, had some things going on that I promise we’ll explain soon ❤️❤️ for now tho, here’s an update on life recently ☁️✨

92,174 comments

ynusername: 🥺🥺🥺🥺

username8: I knew you guys would be okay, take as long as you need my two favourites!!

username9: a big screw you to those who doubted you…real fans love you guys

landonorris: I love you guys, here if you need anything brother ❤️

username10: hope whatever is going on clears up soon, we’re missing you guys around here🩷

lilymhe: tell y/n to gimme a call! ily guys ✨

visacashapprb: can’t wait to welcome y/n back into the paddock soon - see you for race week!

˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚＊

liked by danielricciardo, iamrebeccad and 310,409 others

ynusername: it’s been a long few months, but we finally feel ready to share with you our happy news. pregnancy has been tough, I’d love to say it has treated me well, but it hasn’t. I cannot thank daniel enough for being by my side and helping me out whenever I’ve needed him…baby spam incoming ⛅️🍼

ps. each of us chose a picture to share, guess who chose what 🙄

28,461 comments

danielricciardo: words cannot begin to describe how proud I am of how brave you’ve been, the worst of it is over now my love, the countdown to baby ricciardo starts now

danielricciardo: ps my photo is way cooler than yours is

landonorris: omg I can’t believe you guys didn’t tell me, uncle Lando reporting for duty!

carlossainz55: the biggest congratulations you two, you’re going to be the best parents

carmenmmundt: so glad to hear y/n is doing better, may the rest of your pregnancy be a dream ✨

lilymhe: the strongest girl I know - so excited to see you become a mum 😍

username11: all my manifesting has paid off, baby ricciardo will be the luckiest

oscarpiastri: AUSSIE AUSSIE AUSSIE!!

estebanocon: my spidey senses were spot on, I knew a baby was on the way!

˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚＊

liked by danielricciardo, lance_stroll and 102,585 others

ynusername: life lately 💫 exhausted but loving all the little things (including daniel 😂)

17,492 comments

username12: y/n looks like she’s living the dream, mum life suits her well 🥺

danielricciardo: im definitely not a “little thing” how else did we end up like this?

landonorris: @/danielricciardo excuse me sir you are about to have a child, sort your humour out

maxverstappen1: glad to see you’re feeling more like yourself again y/n, brunch on me soon!

ynusername: @/maxverstappen1 yes - let’s not tell daniel #gatecrasher

danielricciardo: @/ynusername you know your comments are public…right?

username13: anyone else wishing they could brunch with y/n too??

lance_stroll: sending all the good book recs your way!

˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚＊

liked by landonorris, oscarpiastri and 738,603 others

danielricciardo: babymooning 🍼 the smile says it all, so happy to have my girl back on her feet and feeling like herself again…making the last few memories just the two of us 🥺

83,500 comments

ynusername: thank you for the best couple of days and being my personal taxi driver

username14: look at his face - you can tell daniel is buzzing to be a dad

pierregasly: where was my invite?? I thought we were friends

carlossainz55: and mine!

georgerussell63: me too!

landonorris: looks like we were all forgotten!

visacashapprb: enjoy the break daniel! you and y/n absolutely deserve it 🏁🩷

username15: i speak for all your fans when i say keep the holiday photos coming pls

˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚＊

liked by ynusername, georgerussell63 and 920,355 others

danielricciardo: mum and dad 🔥🥺

tagged: ynusername

58,429 comments

landonorris: adopt me pls, im less problematic than a baby

danielricciardo: @/landonorris debatable

lewishamilton: so glad to see you both so happy, good luck with everything

charles_leclerc: wow!! y/n looks insane (suppose you look alright too daniel!)

ynusername: mum and dad?? i can definitely get used to hearing that 🤩

alex_albon: it’s not fair how adorable you two are, this kid is hella lucky!!

username16: pls keep the baby spam coming, you guys are the sweetest 🍼💫

˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚＊

liked by lilymhe, yukitsunoda0511 and 109,446 others

ynusername: the many faces of a man who has just remembered he’s just signed up for no sleep for the next 10 years 😂

tagged: danielricciardo

23,201 comments

danielricciardo: after all I’ve done for you, this is how you repay me? you just wait my love 🫢

ynusername: @/danielricciardo this was too good of an opportunity to miss

carlossainz55: make the most of that middle photo whilst you can danny

georgerussell63: you have NO idea how much I just laughed at this y/n 😂😂😂

schecoperez: speaking from experience, you could not be more correct y/n #dannynosleep

username17: embarrassing dad before even becoming a dad 😬

oscarpiastri: call me for anymore embarrassing daniel pics 😂

danielricciardo: @/oscarpiastri no one asked for you to show up here

username18: I just want you to be my mum and dad instead 😭

˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚＊

liked by oscarpiastri, carmenmmundt and 113,999 others

ynusername: can you believe this man is really about to become a father?? 🤦🏻‍♀️

32,694 comments

charles_leclerc: sometimes i really do wonder what you see in him y/n

landonorris: the biggest clown known to man, still the world’s biggest kid 😂😂

danielricciardo: is that really how you want to talk about the father of your child? I thought you were supposed to love me

ynusername: @/danielricciardo i do, ily very much 🥰

username17: not y/n releasing all the humiliating photos of daniel now they’re about to be parents

username18: y/n’s clearing the phone album for baby spam and giving us daniel spam in return

logansargeant: more to the point, this is the guy you chose as the father of your child??

lilymhe: the two of you are perfect for each other y/n ❤️

˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚＊

liked by ynusername, oscarpiastri and 1,403,407 others

danielricciardo: welcome to the world baby ricciardo 💕

after a lot of hardships and tricky times, y/n and i are beyond excited to share with you that our little one is here. everyone is safe, loved and doing well, my heart has never felt so full 🥺

tagged: ynusername

 ˗ˏˋ 𝐌𝐀𝐒𝐓𝐄𝐑𝐋𝐈𝐒𝐓 ! ´ˎ˗

[hxzbinwrites]

Yayyy! Vox was who I wanted to make a request for so I was thinking what if female reader is an overlord who deals with weapons that can kill sinners and hellborn. Maybe she is also an owner of a nightclub? maybe she died in the 1920s and she knew Alastor as well and maybe she’s had a crush on him but he’s not interested in her so then she goes and she dates Vox but then she catches him positioned with Val and she doesn’t know the extent how Valentino is abusing Vox so then fast forward 7 years later and they meet again because she’s helping Alastor and of course that makes Vox jealous and angry and Vox just wants her back and he’ll do anything to show her that he changed and he just wants her back. And maybe he explains how Val treated him and then a happy ending heheh. 🤭 I love your stories. Also maybe reader is badass and is like doesn’t need a man because she got herself but she also loves when Vox protects her? Kinda like that song on TikTok from Olivia Rodrigo that goes “I’m a feminist obviously but I wouldn’t really mind him saving me”

Vox x Fem! Overlord! Weapons Dealer! Reader | Stayed Gone

(A/n): IM BACCKKKK!!! Sorry this is kind rushed, but it was a really fun write!!! I’m promise I’ll get working on more requests but i’m gonna take it easy to slide back into writing after my little break! Thank you to all of those who supported me through this!! ❤️❤️

Warnings ⚠️: Cussing, Vox is OOC, Cheating, Violence, Short (sorry :( )

“YOU SON OF A BITCH!” (Y/n) said, throwing a wine glass across the room, particularly aiming at the TV who was caught in the act with a certain moth.

“(Y/n), babe, ‘ts not what it looks like I swear-“

“Oh really?” She said, a venomous lilt in her voice,”cause right now it looks like you’re getting screwed by your little business partner? Huh? Am I not right on the money sugar? Oh, but where’s that little sarcastic buzzer now?!”

Vox slipped his pants on, zipping up his fly while trying to walk towards (Y/n)

“I swear, you’ve got it all wrong. I’m..this isn’t…we’re not…”

“Save it.” She said,”This, us, is over. Our business deal is over. And if you even try to negotiate or give me some shitty excuse, this little turf you have will belong to my empire and become my next factory.”

Vox was left, standing here, shirt off and wrinkled pants on, watching as the love of his life took the bare necessities and walked out of his life, all while Valentino watched and smirked at the sight.

—————

7 Years Later

“THAT FUCKER IS BACK!!” Vox screamed, his fists slamming down on the table. A month before (Y/n) walked out, the infamous Radio Demon went MIA, and has now returned to the scene, alongside the Princess of Hell, Charlie Morningstar.

“Yeah” Valentino said, in a sultry voice,”I thought he was gone for good too”

“It’s been seven years!” Vox huffed, turning away from the screen, missing a very crucial person who just walked outside to scope the situation of the attack on the hotel.

“You still pissed he almost beat you that time, right before your little angel walked out~?” Valentino teased, rubbing Vox’s digital cheek on his screen, causing a squeegee noise to be emitted

“Uh, fuck you!”

“Just saying!”

“Things have changed a lot since they both left town!”

“That’s for sure”

“I gotta send a message to who’s, really in charge of things now!!”

“Welcome home, I’m gonna make you wish that you’d stayed gone! Say hello, to a new status quo. Everyone knows that there’s a brand new dawn, turn the TV ON!!!”

“Top of the hour, and we’re discussing a certain ‘has-been’ who has been spotted cavorting around town after a seven year absence! Did anybody miss him? Did anybody notice? More on tonight’s program!”

“So the Radio Demon is back in town! Why’s he hanging around? What does that mean for your family? Well handily I’ve got good news, he’s a loser, a fossil, and I don’t mean to sound hostile, but the demon is a coward!”

“You can take that as gospel! Pulling my viewers? Impossible. I’m visual, he’s barely audible! Stop giving him the time of day, don’t listen to a word he’d say! I hope he had a nice vacay, but he should’ve STAYED AWAY!”

“While he rid in radio, we’ve pivoted to video! Now his medium is getting bloody rare!! Hell’s been better since he split! Where’s he been? Who gives a shit!”

“Salutations! Good to be back on the air~!” A familiar, static filled voice responded.

“Yes I know it’s been a while, since someone with style, treated Hell to a proper broadcast. Sinners rejoice!-“

“What a dated voice!-“

“Instead of a clout-chasing, mediocre video podcast-“

“C’mon!”

“Is Vox insecure? Perusing allure? Flitting between this fad and that, is nothing working?”

“Ignore his chirping!”

“Everyday he’s got a new format!”

“You’re looking at the future, he’s the shit that comes before that!”

“Is Vox as strong as he purports? Or is it based on his support? He’d be powerless without the other Vees!”

“Oh please!”

“And here’s the sugar on the cream, he asked me to join his team! I said no, stole his girl, and now he’s pissy, that’s the tea!”

“WHAT?! YOU OLD-TIMEY P-PRICK, ILL SHOW YOU SUF-UF-FFERING!!!!”

“Uh oh, looks like the TV is buffering” A new voice said, mocking Vox’s breakdown. Except it wasn’t a “new” voice, it was (Y/n). (Y/n), with Alastor, at the Hazbin Hotel.”

“ILL DESTROY-Y YOUUUUUU”

“I’m afraid you’ve lost your signal” Alastor said, taking the mic back before finishing his number.

“Let’s begin~”

“I’m gonna make you wish that I’d stayed gone! Tune on in! When I’m done, your status quo will know it’s race is run! Oh this will be fun!”

Vox could hear Alastor laughing alongside (Y/n) in the background, as his monitors start to flash “no signal”

“FUCK!” He whines

————

The gang was all downstairs, Charlie explaining what tomorrows fun activity would be when a loud banging was heard on the door.

“A NEW GUEST!!” Charlie squealed, stars in her pupils, as she ran to go open the door, only to be met with a very tall TV Overlord.

Alastor’s antlers shot out of his head while (Y/n)‘s weapons were at the ready.

“I come with no harm!” Vox said, raising his hands, before locking eyes with (Y/n). His digital eyes made little heart pupils before blinking them away, embarrassed.

“(Y/n)…” he breathlessly said,”I-I know you hate me…but please, I-“

“Save it Vox.”

“I wish I could explain to you that night, or even today, but I can’t! This….deal has my lips sealed shut my love-I mean (Y/n). I-I just…I cannot explain myself with this contract I have.”

“Wait” Angel Dust said,”You’re Valentino’s little situationship, right?”

“If that’s what you wanna call it….”

“Wait….oh shit” Angel said, walking over to him,”I…I know what it’s like…”

“I know…I see you around his studio…I’m not above owning souls, I have my own, but to work with him…? I’d…..I’d free you all in a heartbeat….”

“Vox?” (Y/n) said,”are you in some sort of deal with Val over your…body.”

Vox could only look at her, not able to give her any conformation.

“Oh Vox…I…I didn’t know…I-“

“I know dear…” Vox said, smiling sadly,”but you have a erm….partner, of sorts, not your finest option but whatever, now and I wouldn’t want to intervene-“

“Oh Alastor? Me and him aren’t in a relationship” (Y/n) replied,”You know him, Mr. Ace in the Hole!”

“A what now?-“

“Ohhhhh, that…that explains so much.” Vox said, looking at the Radio Demon.

“Vox…I-I think we need to go home, talk about this in private….after I squish a bug.”

“Okay…” Vox said, holding (Y/n)‘s hand,”but what about this hotel?”

“I’ll still work here, with everyone, I believe in the cause. I just didn’t think you’d want to.”

“Maybe I can….put some ads on if you’d like-“

“YES YES YES PLEASE THANK YOU MR. VOX SIR ID REALLY APPRECIATE IT!!!” Charlie said, shaking Vox’s other hand,”IM CHARLIE!!”

Vox smiled, a genuine smile for the first time in a while,”Yeah, yeah I think I need to hang here a little more often…detox a little…”

“Good, I can’t have you stressed out too much, I just got you back.” (Y/n) said, rubbing his digital cheek affectionately,”my little trophy husband”

[theambitiouswoman]

what are things we should think about daily? i notice my thought patterns are really about my family , the love i didn’t get , the life i didn’t get to live , the hardship i had to go through because i didn’t have them , etc. it’s all sad. it has impacted the way i see myself but I want to change. what should i do now? to commit to change and be better? i’m highly triggered about everything so i stay away from ppl bc mentally im not okay and i need 6months to recover at least from anyone outside my kids. also do you explain to ppl how you feel?! or you rather not?!

It seems like your thoughts are predominantly negative. So what I would recommend you do next is to forgive yourself for the past, because you are not that person any more and you didn’t know better. Now you do and now you’re only focused is on creating the life you actually want. When negative thoughts creep up, think of 3 positive ones so you can start retraining your mindset.

If you continue to focus on the negative angel you are going to attract more negative things. Don’t put yourself in your own mental prison. Doesn’t help you.

I’m sure you’re highly triggered and it would be impossible not to be. Your nervous system must be a mess, but please please please you need to stop replaying this old narrative in your mind.

Stay away from people that sounds like a great idea to me. I don’t know that I would say go into social isolation because that is very unhealthy and the margin of time a person can do that is very dependent. But take time for yourself for sure. Stop worrying about other people, what they think, want. Stop trying to make everyone else happy or like you. Screw everyone else honestly lol (be kind and respectful always). But your life needs to stop revolving around other people. The only reason it does is because you are looking for validation and approval from others, you are using them as some sort of emotional clutch without realizing it. Which is normal in your position so I’m not saying this as criticism but more to help you look at the facts as a way to make peace with it.

I would also suggest not explaining to people how you feel. It’s no one’s business. Especially if they’re not helping you. You don’t owe them anything lol but a notebook and start journaling. It’s more therapeutic anyway. Just decanter everyone but yourself and your kids (as it should be anyway!)

[hyperactivewhore]

The Mikaelson family’s relationships, especially their romantic relationships, are weird. Klaus and Elijah have a weird thing going on in which they share partners (Katherine, Tatia, Hayley - but probably more. I think it’s kinda gross being with someone who’s been with your brother but to each their own I guess). Freya fell in love with someone she kidnapped - which is never a great sign.

But the worst is probably Rebekah who is technically Marcel’s aunt - and yet they’re together romantically. Davina is like Marcel’s daughter - and yet she’s with Kol who is like Marcel’s uncle which would mean that Davina is like Marcel’s aunt. However, if Hope is the sister of Marcel, and Marcel is the father of Davina, would that make Hope her aunt? Or if Davina’s with Kol, does that make Hope her niece and Marcel her nephew?

Honestly I think the only Mikaelson sibling to have a normal (as normal as it can be given that they’re vampires and live through centuries) romantic relationship is Finn. I think he and Sage were a pretty normal, average couple compared to everyone else.

I don’t know… I’m trying not to analyze the Mikaelsons and their messed up relationships too much because it kinda grosses me out and makes my head hurt. Im trying to focus on the bright side - no one is actually related - so that’s good.

The Mikaelson are each so fucked up and their personal relationships are even more screwed.

It was implied in The Vampire Diaries the Mikaelson shared partners sexually, and there was this one girl called Mary Porter/Scary Mary, who was a "Original groupie". She was close to all of them, to the point none of them could "remember" by which sibling she had been turned. Knowing how fucked up they are, sharing partners isn't something weird, especially to Klaus and Elijah who loved fighting over the same girl.

Freya falling in love with Keelin was so fucked up. I like them, they're cute once you get past the whole kidnapping thing, but it's wrong regardless. After she finally got with Freya, her storyline was reduced to nothing: she just became her love interest and stopped being her own person. Not surprising, though, the writers of this shows love doing that.

Marcel falling for Rebekah is just straight up grooming, and it's crazy how it was never addressed or how the fandom denies it. You're gonna tell me she saw him grow up, saw his brother love and care for him as his own son, and still managed to be attracted to him? To even marry him and want children with him? It's a miracle he never called her aunt at least once, even if it was sarcastically. I really don't like how the show kept painting Marcel as the bad guy and Rebekah as the victim because he refused to be/couldn't be with her, like why?

I can overlook Kol and Davina because he never saw Marcel as family and she never saw the Mikaelson as her family either, didn't even like them. Still wrong tho, because Davina was like fifteen/sixteen by the time they met and Kol/Kaleb looked around his twenties.

Finn and Sage were absolutely adorable. I truly like Finn and I wished he had at least a chance at a happy ending, but sadly he died twice and he couldn't even mourn the woman he loved.

At least they're not related, but fucked up anyway. I try not to analyze the Mikaelson relationships either because they're clearly problematic and fucked up even for an universe such as The Vampire Diaries, but oh well.

Thanks for the ask! I had fun answering it.

[pompoenwolkjes]

hiii hope you dont mind me asking about your wips specifically fem hyunin and for all us darling aliens 👀 (also im going to answer the ask you sent me soon 🩵)

Hi!! Thank you for asking! I absolutely don't mind, more yelling time for me! hahah

Fem hyunin is actually one that I have changed the plot for two times already and I might switch gears again once I write more hdhd the only clear though my brain had while writing this, was "LESBIAN HYUNIN" and that's it hahaha but I CAN tell you what it's current plot is:

its enganged Jeongin whose slowly falling out of love with her partner. And they both can tell but like each other enough to give it some more time in the hopes that the feelings will return.

And its Hyunjin who accompanies her friend to a family gathering, seeing Jeongin and immediately being enthralled by her.

Likewise, Jeongin is very interested in getting to know more about the beautiful girl who keeps staring at her and who blushes so prettily when she looks back.

Cue lots of Hyunjin pining and Jeongin having way to much fun flustering her, which later turns into Jeongin coming over to Hyunjin's place.

Snippet:

Jeongin blinks at the bottle of wine on the kitchen island. Hyunjin already hurrying over to fill up their glasses. Almost folding into herself, looking small and fragile, nervous. So different to the way she’d beamed when she opened the door to find Jeongin on the other side, unashamed joy on her face before carefully tucking it away. Being so happy about someone else’s fiancée turning up on your doorstep might not be proper, Jeongin gets it, even if she thinks it’s stupid. There’s nothing for Hyunjin to be ashamed of.  Hyunjin’s still fidgeting with the bottle, trying to get the screw-cap off, fingers shaking, eyes downcast. And Jeongin thinks she might know what this is about after all.  Gently she reaches out and puts two fingers on Hyunjin’s soft skin, tilting her chin up to meet her eyes.  “I don’t need to be drunk to like you, Hyunjin-ah” Wide eyes stare back at her, lips parted in surprise, slight blush on her cheeks and god she looks so lovely.

for all us darling aliens is my space au! Chan, Changbin and Minho are a space traveling crew, with Chan and Changbin being humans and Minho a (wild)cat shapeshifter. Changbin and Minho are in a relationship. On one of their travels, Minho gets very ill and Changbin sets out to find a cure for him while Chan stays behind to take care of Minho.

Going through space on your own is not very smart but they can't leave Minho alone or take him on the ship either. Along the way Changbin meets the rest of the skz who are from different planets. Including Hyunjin, who Changbin very quickly catches feelings for while still being in love with Minho as well. And the closer they get to the cure, the more conficted Changbin feels, wanting to get back to Minho as soon as possible but also not knowing what to say about Hyunjin. Main paring is minbinjin (help what are those three called hdhdh) with side seungin, jilix, and Chan joins a pairing but I'm not yet spoiling which one heheh

Snippet:

Seungmin doesn’t try to hide his displeasure when he turns around to face Changbin.  “We don’t have to take this route-” “We need the minerals for Minho,” Changbin interrupts. “It’s not the only planet that has those minerals,” Seungmin coldly points out. “It is the closest one,” Changbin returns, just as blunt. “Finding another planet like this might take us more time than we have. You know that damn well.” Seungmin deflates, looking a little lost instead of the intimidating presence he was moments before.  “Just- don’t make him fight, I- please, I’m not afraid of dying but not him, he wasn’t meant for this.” Hand coming up to protectively rest on the back of his neck like he can still feel the warmth Jeongin’s fingers left on his skin.  “He’d do it if you asked, so fiercely loyal," Seungmin can’t stop the fondness that bleeds into his tone but his gaze is sharp, like he knows his words hit home, knows Changbin isn’t just thinking of Jeongin when he looks over Seungmin’s shoulder, eyes flitting to another fierce little thing. One he’s just as desperate to protect as Seungmin is with Jeongin.

UM SO this is LONG omg sorry I am incapable of making my snippets short dhhdhd

Thank you again for taking an interest in my silly thoughts and letting me yell about them, I had fun writing it down <3

[tiny-sassy-aggressive]

9-1-1 WATCH AND REACTION

S2 ep11-18

Hell yeah Maddie ! New beginnings!!!! Punch buck!! Woooo!!!

CHIMNEY PLEASE STOP HANGING OUT WOTH DOUG IM CRYIKNG

the shark storyline seemed so unnecessary?? I loved it?? Go sharky go!!!

I LOVED Athena’s entire story this episode and I’m glad it didn’t end with a resolution. Some things just can’t be resolved so easily. There is some deep rooted. Issues. And it can’t be solved with one conversation.

WGT WOHLD MADDIE LEAVE THE SOOR OPEN NO NO JO CHIN EG NOOOOOO HEA DOWN NOOOOO MADDIE NOOOOO MADDIE NOOOO

Ep12:

Oh shoot oh chimney. I’m actually in tears this entire episode. CAN I JUST SAY SCREW GERRARD EHAR THE HECK FOR BOTH HIM AND HEN GEEZ. Tommy. Oh Tommy Tommy. I see you.

KEVIN KEBIN NO OH SHOOT AND THE CHILD IS NOW ADAM KEVIN IM GONNA LOSE IT

this is a fantastic origin story. And such a sweet family with the lees. Non blood families are still families

Ep 13

I can’t believe buck found chimney oh my damn goodness. Why did he think he could steal the phone. Oh that little interaction between Eddie and buck was everything- buck will do anything for Maddie. I’m crying

MADDIE. Maddie. Is so damn strong and resilient it’s. Terrifying bc it. It’s a reality. This is real. Everything with Doug and her pain is so. Real. Jennifer is truly an amazing actress. I was so scared the entire episode. Everything she lived through and the flashbacks to her life with Doug.

Wait- Christopher’s first instinct at the hospital was to abandon his parents and go sit in the chair next to chims bed???? He is the sweetest child I am dead

When Chim and Maddie realized they were both Alive oh my heart

Ep 14

Is it bad I started every episode with “oh great who’s gonna die today”

Bobby having Buddie be his glamorous assistants I cried? Buck loves KIDS OH MY GOSH. And and the little baby bringing his mom back to life? Speaking of amazing actors Hen??? Her collapsing got me hard. Amazing vs miracle damn straight

the gas line explosions were so scary!! Nobody looked concerned either buck hanging from the ladder I screamed but OKAY SPIDER EDDIE??

TOMMYS BACK??????

so glad Bobby and Michael were able to talk!!!! Their fight left me worried for a second!

And okay okay Maddie and chimney just need a minute! JUDT a minute. Makes sense! They need it

Speed running Ep 15-ep 17

I LOVE A GOOD HEIST. I was raised on Brooklyn 99 baby heist season was the best. This was executed so well I loved every bit. The questioning scene was executed so well I swear this show has the best interactions(?) the way conversations flow easily between different characters but is creating a cohesive line? Does that make sense they do it all the time

What are the chances Maddie texts buck about money RIGHT at that moment lmao they look guilty as hell

Okay well now I wanna watch Chris surf??? Bet?? Sounds fun?? How DOES Eddie have all this money to afford all this? I’m with Shannon tbh I’d worry too

Oh and LOVE the Marty reveal scene at the 118- man are they intimidating

Ep 16

Anything to do with Bobby’s storyline I am OBSESSED WITH. Every church scene is perfection. I’m Catholic so those scenes hit DIFFERENT AND are also very appropriate and real! Whoever workshopped that scene actually understands Catholicism which you don’t see that often!

I also really liked the cinematography floating in the smoke and the flashes- very similar to chimneys which I loved.

I didn’t. I didn’t loovveee the ep ending on a happy note bc we know from the season prior that Bobby was still intending on. Harming himself. Once the book was complete so that felt weird. But overall great episode and insight

Also I like Tommy. He started iffy but grew to like him especially that chicken scene lmao

Ep 17

CAPTAIN HANNNN love to see it :)

So so cute that chimney called cap- he IS a chef it was a good all for a unique rescue.

Ohh nooo she wants a divorce from Eddieeeee

Maddie is SUCH. A great dispatcher calm quick and resourceful - that scene was a little kitschy but cute ! I’m glad she’ll stay in dispatch

OH SHES DEAD IH JO SHES DEAD NO NO NO DHANNON WAIT I THOUGHR WE HAD MORE TIME WITH YOU NOOOOOO

Ep18:

If I thought Gerard was gonna have to catch these hands OHHHHHH the Diaz parents?????? Shannon’s body is still warm and you’re insulting her and telling Eddie to move back home?? Absolutely not. Absolutely NOT. How dare you.

BUCK LOFT YAYYYYYYYYY

Ms becca this was hilarious #ThoseTwoFirefighters I needed this. Also what was with the comment saying buck/eddie should be a couple?? Such a random thing to drop. Again like the elf, scene was complete with out that addition imo??

Bomb at Athena’s house was terrifying I was screaming at Harry to stop

OH IRS RBE BOY ITS A CALLBACK FO TBE ADSON CASE NO NONKO

oh buck

Okay so the 118 witnessed Shannon’s death and then buck being crushed can they catch a break????? One after the other??? Sobbing at how the community came together to rescue him i cried. The music didn’t help.

Lowkey happy it was Carla whom buck saw when he woke up! But. Idk. Nde. Nobody from the 118 was there for that Scene. Felt weird tbh given other hospital trips.

Concerned with bucks immediate fear driven anger about returning to work. I know what’s coming so I’m going to be careful to document each perspective I see!

Eddies a firefighter!!!! OH A BATHENA WEDDING HELLO???? MADNEY?????????, HENREN CHILD HELLO!?!! We are TYING KNOTS PEOPLE

[cyborkk]

“do I look different?”

————————- ꧁✩✬✩✬꧂ -————————

A question ive heard from almost everyone ive known. Including myself. They look in a mirror, dreading the way they look. The way they sound. The way they act.

But how could a kid possibly hate how they look?

“I’m too skinny. im too fat. I wish I was brunette. Or maybe blond. I wish I had curls like her, I wish my hair was straighter than a ruler.”

“If I throw myself on a field, waving my abs around. Am I macho? Or cool? Call a gay kid a slur? Maybe it’ll hide my obvious interest in men.”

Highschoolers are fake. The hallways? Filled with drama, and chaos. The moment I turned 13 I knew my life was over. I had to care about being cool, or liking this or liking that or liking her. Sometimes my head hurts because he’s so handsome, and she’s so gorgeous.

“Just don’t be gay. That’s weird.”

I’m weird.

Change your hair. Fix your attitude. Why do you dress like that? Your stupid. Your fat. No, you’re skinny. Oh fuck, now you’re fat and stupid!

But.

Have you eaten lately?

“You look different now.”

“You’re different.”

I know im different. You remind me. They remind me.

I look around at my classmates. Blonde, brunette, black, white, tan. Girls, boys, trans guys and girls.

Why the fuck does it matter if she screwed that guy? Or if he lost his virginity. Why does it matter if that girl wants to be a guy? Or that guy wants to be a girl?

There is so much hate.

We’re only kids. we can’t be kids forever. Don’t you listen to your parents? Enjoy your youth. Don’t cause drama. You say you listen, yet there are still huge numbers in suicide cases for teenagers. And what are the teachers doing? The parents? Adults that are supposed to protect us from this.

Keep us safe.

“I can’t stop crying. I’m so hungry but mom says I’ll be skinny soon.”

Why is it that we revolve everything around weight? Let me give you an example. A mother has twins. They’re healthy. One just.. puts on a little more weight. Instead of helping, do you know what her mother says?

“You’re so fat.”

And it starts. The disorder. Yes, she loses weight. Becomes “popular” with the girls and the jocks and she’s finally happy?

Throwing up your food makes you happy?

You can have so much sex. Drink so much booze. Smoke a shit ton of weed. But let’s face the facts.

we’re just kids and the world is laughing at us.

Don’t you remember? Climbing up on daddy’s lap, laughing, unaware of the cruel ass world. But— even then. We were so mean.

“I know my dad, do you?”

“My mom said your dad cheated on your mom and left. Hah! So funny!”

“My mom and dad said they loved eachother, so why do they fight?”

“My dad hit me last night. He said it was an accident. He smelled funny.”

“My mom looks at me weird after dad left.”

“I don’t see my parents much.”

I don’t think they notice, they shape our lives. They just like to criticize and criticize. And when we break. They yell at us and break us down. Like we’re the ones in the wrong.

“Depression isn’t real.”

“Teenagers are so exhausting.”

“So dramatic.”

“It’s not a big deal.”

To them, we are nothing if we complain. If we feel pain, or cry, or hurt. We’re dramatic because we never went through their struggle. Oh no. It’s not like we’re a whole new generation. No! We’re just dumb kids.

I don’t blame them. Their parents weren’t exactly uh.. stable. So they grow around this hate, pass that hate to us. And they wonder why we hate coming home. Why we HATE hearing,

“oh your just like your dad! You look so much like your mom!”

I spend hours. Changing myself. Taking nice pictures.

hey. I think I like this guy.

I should totally go for it, right?

They date. Everything was bliss. Then a random text.

“Hey, can you send?”

What? Send what?

“Nudes. Duh.”

I’ve never done that. she says.

“Don’t be a fucking baby.”

I’m with family.

“Just go in your bathroom.”

she did it of course. We all want validation. We crave it. Even if it will kill us. I don’t get the appeal.

I don’t get the appeal of being an asshole. Forcing yourself onto people, forcing them to vape or send weird pictures or.. kill themselves. Just don’t be a dick!

Be a kid.

I’m tired of the voices screaming at me, saying I suck. I’m an idiot.

I know!

They call me names, I go home and.. the feeling swallows me up. It’s the same thing over and over again. The same cycle. I’m tired of it! I want to be different! I want to look different.

why can’t I be DIFFERENT?!

I feel panic swallow me whole. The only thing I can hear is my ac wind blowing. Everything else is gone. And im.. okay.

Moral of the story? Be kind.

Oh! One last thing. I just need an opinion.

“Do I look different?”

————————- ꧁✩✬✩✬꧂ -————————

[zzencat]

Literally forgot to add: emoji 🧙‍♀️ sun sign Leo, initial: S.M

Questions (organized, I wrote them in a big long paragraph earlier)

Is the business venture I want to pursue the right one right now? And will I be okay (financially and stuff)

Will that creep leave me and my family alone?

What's my future spouse like?

Bye now!

hi sm!!! if you haven’t read a novel recently, get ready for a bit of reading 😅 other than that, thank you for participating! (ive also seen your other ask so dw)

ok so i have wild news my friend. i don’t recommend you going down this path, even though you’d have a lot of pride in your work here. if you want to be financially ok, this is not it. you’re being asked to have a lot of strength if you do. you’ll be in financial stress and overwhelmed. furthermore, you’ll be faced with a bit of oppression and competitiveness- overall, just people treating you badly. you could be faced with a lot of power imbalance as well and your communication efforts aren’t gonna pay off enough. future relationships or potential collaborations will have a slim chance of succeeding as well. it’s looking like a bad ending for…pretty much every aspect. it’s a shame that you can’t exactly capitalize off of this and maintain an ounce of good mental health. chances are things will start to break apart, and you’re having doubts even now. i suggest making this a side hustle or hobby, but not as the main career choice. you’ll be treated very unfairly going down this road.

the best outcome for you at the moment that brings you comfort, confidence, and stable income, is to come to either leave home and move somewhere else, OR resolve conflict that’s currently going on (esp w/ family members) and pursue something more practical and although the environment isn’t as creative or fun as you’d want it to be, you’ll be a lot happier. cards also suggest better planning skills and looking at this logically. you should also act on a well-thought out plan asap. you might think it’s sad that you can’t pursue whatever it is you wanted (creative and emotional attachment) but you’ll be a lot better off financially and with more confidence too, trust. things will play out from there :)

this is also the 2nd time i’ve seen a suggestion for you to get out of your environment. you or with your family as well. there’s been a big stagnancy going on for a while. i also suggest not making any bad moves against this creep and it will resolve on its own. it might take a while and it’s kinda pissing me off too even now, but despite everything weird or terrible that might happen (like a huge loss of something), you guys will have a happy ending. also, don’t let anyone screw with you or destroy your light! keep your head up and you should be pretty good!!

some qualities of your future spouse!! :

*note: cards came out SO easy damn

- your fs is not ready yet but this person is on the way. slowly though. they’re very careful with love but very easy going as well

- i get that they’re confident and chill and make all the right moves! i have a feeling they’re also pretty experienced with life and will lead you too! this person is going to be a mentor for you in many ways and will teach you tons

- it seems you’re not ready at the moment either, but they ABSOLUTELY will be in your life

- this person could be traveling rn btw

- they move fast too. they’re efficient in work and thinking

- this person could be from a different culture as well, but im getting the most on them teaching you something

- i think you’ll also live in prosperity in the future with this person! either that, or this person grew up in a family that’s well off

- they’re working at the moment and not resting. they’ve either got one main job or they can make decisions with ease

- this person might show up in your life when you need help or are at one of your weakest moments

- stable and ready to take it on

[abcdosaka]

Did I ever write out my New Year’s resolutions? I don’t think I really did. My resolutions are always really simple that I end up completing or at least partially completing a few of them. This time around I want to make some goals and plan them out instead of type B-ing my way through it.

1. Exercise. Gym. Pool. My body misses moving around so bad. This is definitely the worst part of the suburbs. Thinking about signing up for a city community centre membership since there’s a bunch of discounts for me and there’s one real close to my new place. The women only gyms here don’t have pools either so I’m just gonna have to accept working out with men there 🤢. I think Im at a point where idgaf anymore though like i can do it.

2. Start learning a new language. I’m thinking Chinese and/or (my family’s native language). lol given current political situations in the US but I was thinking about this even before the TikTok ban. And yet those yanks still got a head start on me. I just feel like both of these would be useful career wise. I should really brush up on my French as well it’d be useful for government work. (I’m extremely corporate pilled atm)

3. Read more books. I made a good reads this year to track my reading. I think last year all I got through was the asoiaf books lol. I’ve added a ton to my list though, especially non fiction. Non fiction might be my new thing. There’s a library close to my new place so I hope they have a good selection.

4. Furnish and decorate my new place. I still don’t have a couch or even a proper dresser lmao I mean no wonder I don’t like my current place. I knew I wouldn’t renew my lease when I signed it a year ago but i honestly do wish I furnished it more. I want a tv and a tv stand. And a coffee table. I want to take care of plants.

5. Buy a new computer and a better wfh set up. My current desk is kinda shit but the real problem is my laptop. I want a nice chair with back support and something to convert my workstation to a standing desk.

6. Learn about car maintenance. Apparently quite a few ppl actually learned through mechanic simulator or whatever that game is called. I feel like this is probably worth knowing. But also if I don’t really have a space to work on a car this might have to be put off.

7. Try to meet new people somehow. This isn’t very difficult but I’m trying to be discerning. I realized the reason I hate relationships is because I’ve almost always had my most important and close relationships end poorly or turn toxic or distant. (Distant being the most common bc of literal distance). Partly bc of me and partly not. I’m tired of wasting time and not valuing myself enough though like I’m not bothering with anymore flip floppy bitches.

I do think I need to go at it like fb marketplace instead of taking everything personal though. But instead of selling a product like I am the product. Oh wait that’s not great either. Hmm. In any case I need a better support network here like rn it kinda sucks and if I have an emergency I’m a little screwed. And I want to split rent with someone lol.

8. Learn personal finances. This one I absolutely want to get done and I think is the most feasible.

I do have pretty high hopes for this year bc i just don’t wanna be as sad as I was for the past 2 and now I feel like I am actually currently in control of a lot more than I was before so I think it’s possible I can be a happy work in progress.

By the way, writing this post took 20% of my phone battery. Resolution 8a. Get a new phone

[limeleviathan]

introducing traumatised lesbians: part 2!

meet Cerulean

yes im using the same second image as i did with AVIAN, sue me

anyway, this is Cerulean! she goes by she/her and is AVIAN's beloved girlfriend

her speech indicator will be C, for example (C: do you need a hug?)

she is one of the few members of the group who is not a Subject of Operation Hydra, however she bore witness to what caused AVIAN to become part of it, and was most supportive of getting her the help she needed. she is incredibly compassionate, but fiercely defends her friends, drawing her blade if she believes any of them to be in danger

she is the quietest member of the group by far when around people she doesnt know, but around her closest friends, or especially her girlfriend, AVIAN, she is able to talk for hours

while she has no special abilities herself, the sword she wields does grant access to Blinking, a low-distance, electrified teleport, and the sword itself is capable of chaining lightning in exchange for a large amount of energy

BACKSTORY (Sunset Beginnings)

its an even longer one than the other two, 3000 words this time :3

I’ve never been the extroverted type. The fact that some people are able to talk to new people easily just doesn’t make sense to me. Whenever I see someone cool, someone who I want to get to know better, I’ve tried talking, but for some reason, when I began the conversation, it quickly ground to a halt.

Naturally, this made school difficult. Where others were in bustling circles, each group intertwined through a person or two, I sat alone. Whenever I tried to change that, people just moved on. I felt like no one wanted me. I felt like no one cared. A few other kids tried to stick with me out of pity, but I just couldn’t handle the group environment of most friend groups.

It wouldn’t come as a surprise that group projects always filled me with dread. Usually, when I see everyone else’s results, I see them all standing together, sharing together, enjoying each other’s company. My groups, however, are never that cohesive. While the rest of the group is always just talking and being happy, they leave me all the work because I don’t talk much, and then when my nervousness prevents me from sharing, they just take all the credit! I was considering just leaving school altogether, and I was only 10!

This all changed one day, though. As I walked into class, hoping I wouldn’t get too screwed over in the group project I knew we had today, the teacher gestured for me to sit at the table at the back of the room. Not a great start, considering the kind of kids that usually sit there. At least for now, though, the table sat empty, and I waited anxiously to find out who I would be with.

And then she walked in. I saw, coming through the door, the vibrant orange of Tangelo, known for assisting anyone with any troubles whatsoever. Whether just a confusing homework question or even losing a family member, she always put others first, and always made sure that the problem was managed before she left. I had always been hoping that someday I may be able to talk to her about my inability to make friends, but just being in her vicinity made the words get caught in my throat.

She followed the teacher’s gesture to my table, her face glowing with excitement. She was my opposite in almost every way imaginable: while I was reserved and kept to myself, she had an expansive circle of friends and talking to others was second nature to her. While I was always shy and scared of others’ perception of me, she was proud and uncaring of any criticisms anyone else has. Not that they have any. She had never made an enemy, as far as I knew.

Ever since our first day in this class, she had caught my attention and I wished I could be closer to her. The way she always smiles when anyone compliments her, the way she fervently defends anyone being bullied or even just insulted, the way she lights up the room just by entering it. Unfortunately, she made me more nervous than anyone else at first, so I was simply hoping that she would someday approach me.

Now, as I sat right next to her, I hoped that it would finally happen. And it did. About a minute after sitting down, she started talking. I still love how she is able to talk for hours on end, even when she has a sore throat and it physically hurts. She just loves the company of others, and being able to listen to her ramble on about her interests still warms my heart.

Wait, I’m getting sidetracked now. Where was I? Oh wait, she just sat down. Yeah, as she started talking, I immediately felt nervous, but unlike with anyone else, I was still able to talk relatively comfortably.

“Hi!” she exclaimed, her permanent smile still as bright as ever. “Hey,” I responded quietly, not sure how to approach a conversation like this. “Sorry in advance that you have to work with me… you probably know that I can’t present too well, so I think I’m going to have to leave that to you…” “Hey, don’t apologise. I didn’t just get put into this with you, I wanted to work with you. You’ve always been alone, and when you haven’t, you’ve always been thrown with the… less mature kids. Anyway, I asked Mr. Saffron if I could work with you, and he let us!” “You… you actually wanted to work with me? I… I’ve never actually had anyone want to spend time with me, let alone work with me.” “Well, that’s their loss! From what I’ve seen throughout the year, you’re a really cool person, and I probably would have approached you a little sooner if it weren’t for how you often seem kinda uncomfortable when talking with people.” “Wait, you noticed that? I’d always thought I’d kept that a lot more hidden…” “It is actually hidden fairly well, it’s just that I’ve always been able to tell when people don’t feel comfortable. Hey, if you want, you could hang out with me and my friends at lunch! We’re usually in the games room, you could meet us there!” “We have a games room?! Why did no one tell me about this sooner?!” “I take it you’re interested, then!” “Absolutely! Video games are my favourite!” “Well, I’ll see you there! Also it’s good to see you being excited, I haven’t seen that too much this year and I’m glad I’ve been able to help!”

She was right. I couldn’t remember the last time I was excited to do something social at the time. Usually I’d thought of it as a chore, but that time? Between spending more time with Tangelo and getting to maybe meet more people who love gaming, I was genuinely excited to meet someone for the first time in years.

We kept chatting as we worked on our poster, and when class finished, Tangelo led me out and towards the games room. As we stepped into the room, I was amazed. The whiteboard that stretched across the room was glowing with the light of a screen I knew well, coming from a projector at the back of the room. I looked around and saw a long table with bags and lunch boxes scattered across. In the centre of the room lay patches of beanbags, with 2 couches at the back. There was a group of sticks gathered around the front, where they each connected their controllers before they all turned to us.

“Hi guys!” Tangelo said, cheerfully. “We’ve got a new player here! Cerulean, say hi!” “Hey…” I murmured, not expecting to encounter so many people here. Tangelo noticed my hesitation, and turned to me, face warm with compassion. “It’s alright to be nervous. I know you struggle with talking to new people, especially so many.” How did she know? “Maybe it’d be better if we introduce you through the game. You know how to play Smash?” “Do I?! Of course I do!” “Well then! Grab a controller and let's play!”

I ran excitedly to the front of the room, and a tall purple stick handed me a pro controller. That stick came to be known as ARACHNID, Tangelo’s adopted sibling and fellow Subject later on. They have expressed wishes for their former name to not be disclosed, so I’ll just refer to them as ARACHNID from here on out. Anyway, I grabbed the controller, thanked them, and flopped onto a beanbag. Tangelo sat down with me shortly after. Then, we began.

These sticks were a lot better than I was expecting, but I think I held my own fairly well, especially considering that this was my first ever 8 player game. They were all so welcoming, and when I won game 3, they had an idea.

“Let’s all go random!” a green stick called out. Another stick I got to know better later on. Her, although at the time it was his, name was Forest, now known as LEVIATHAN or Lime. The reasoning behind that last nickname was an interesting one. One day, a while later, she would just pull a lime out of her backpack, mid-game, and just… take a bite out of it. Skin and everything. It was… certainly an interesting thing to witness, and distracted us just long enough for her to just get two free kills in that game. We never got distracted like that again, but we called her Lime from then on out.

Anyway, we all went random, and chaos ensued as almost everyone groaned after seeing their fighters, and then proceeded to target Tangelo who allegedly got one of her best ones. She still won. Her skill was admirable, and although the gap has closed slightly, it’s always impressive when she manages the impossible.

We kept playing until Lime checked her watch and declared that this was the last game. Upon its completion, we packed the switch into the drawer at the front of the room, which contained many more games and controllers left unused. I thanked everyone for letting me play and being so kind, and they let me know that I could return every day if I wanted to. Now, fast forward 4 years, me and Tangelo still go daily, with her whole friend group, although Lime and ARACHNID have both moved on to high school. Allegedly they also have a gaming group there, and also play Smash, so I expect that when we arrive next year, Lime will be ready to take us on in a school environment once more.

Anyway, that's enough about Year 5, time to talk about the next big moment. In Year 7, Tangelo invited me to her house for a sleepover, and her being my bestie, I accepted immediately. Here’s the difficult part, though. I had realised I was actually a lesbian a few months prior, when I began to develop a crush on her. I knew that I would probably get rejected, since she was probably straight and wouldn’t feel the same way, but after all that time, I thought I might as well tell her.

I thought of an amazing idea as to how: Truth or Dare. Never have I heard of a sleepover where Truth or Dare was never played, and you are bound to speak the truth there. So I decided I would try and slightly manipulate the game to the point where someone, hopefully Tangelo, would ask me about my crush. 

As I arrived, I greeted Tangelo with the standard hug and bonk on the head that we often did to each other. She welcomed me inside, and showed me around. I saw ARACHNID just sitting in the living room on their phone, and they waved when they saw me. I waved back. When we got to Tangelo’s room, we heard the doorbell, and both sprinted back to the door to welcome Lime in. We all went back to Tangelo’s room, and I actually got a chance to look at it this time.

It was a fairly cosy yet chaotic place that reflected Tangelo very well. The bed was vibrant blues and oranges in a sunset, completely unmade. The corner of the room housed a large bookshelf, filled to the brim with many different series. Her bedside table held a stack of books seven high, all from one series. A desk in the corner held her laptop, and there was an external keyboard and mouse connected to it, all glowing a pale blue. I felt at ease in her room. I felt calm.

Another knock at the door, and Tangelo ran back over to let Scarlet in. As they both returned, we all sat on Tangelo’s bed and continued chatting. Eventually, Tangelo suggested we play Truth or Dare to spice things up. Considering that I was hoping for it, I accepted immediately, and Scarlet began.

“Tangelo, truth or dare?” she asked. “Let's start with a truth.” Tangelo replied. “Have you ever wished you could kill anyone?” “Nope! I try not to make enemies if I can avoid it, and besides, messing with them in every way imaginable is a lot more fun.” “...How would you know that it’s more fun?” Lime asked curiously. “Doesn’t take much thought to know that messing with someone is more fun than murder,” Tangelo responded. “Fair enough.”

I went next.

“Scarlet, truth or dare?” I asked. “Truth,” she responded. “Lotta truth already, huh,” I responded. “Anyway, have you ever had a crush on anyone?” “Yeah. There’s this one guy in my math class, you wouldn’t know him though. His name’s Turquoise.” 

Next up was Tangelo.

“Forest, truth or dare?” “Truth,” he responded, sounding… nervous? Also I’m using he because that’s what he was at the time. That wouldn’t last much longer. “Hmmmm… What is your biggest secret?”

He took a deep breath, clearly mentally preparing to let out something big. We all waited anxiously, wondering what could be making him so nervous, especially considering that he very rarely got nervous at all, let alone THAT nervous. 

At last, with a deep inhale, he finally began. “I… I’m…” He sighed, and, with a sudden burst of energy, announced “Ya boy’s a girl!” We all sat in silence for a moment, shocked by the sudden announcement, before Scarlet began chanting “One of us! One of us! One of us!”

Me and Tangelo immediately burst out laughing, before both flopping forwards to hug Lime. Scarlet joined us a moment later.

“I’m so glad you were able to tell us,” Tangelo told Lime, slightly muffled by being mid-hug with 3 other sticks. “And managing to keep your usual energy? That would have been tough with how stressful that must have been. We are all so proud of you” “Damn right we are!” Scarlet added, her voice filled with her usual fervour. “We’ll always love you, girl!” I exclaimed. In a much softer tone, I added, “we’ll always be here for you, you can come to us if you need it.�� “Thanks guys,” Lime responded, “I’m so glad you all are so supportive. It means a lot to me.”

We all sat there for a few minutes, hugging each other like there was no tomorrow, before Lime sat up once more.

“Well, the game’s still going,” Lime announced, “and it’s my turn! Cerulean, truth or dare!” We all returned to where we were sitting, eager to return to the game. “Let’s mix things up a little. Dare!” “Slap ARACHNID with a fish.” “What?” “You heard me.” “Why?” “Why not?” “Hey, sorry to burst your bubble, but there aren’t any fish in this house right now,” Tangelo stated, sounding… regretful? Why was everyone so intent on me slapping Tangelo’s sibling with a fish? “I’ll deal with that,” Scarlet said, eyes filled with determination, “nearest supermarket is only a couple minute walk if I’m fast enough. I’ll have your fish soon!”

With that, she left the room. I was still confused on why everyone wanted me to slap Tangelo’s sibling with a fish, but hey, a dare’s a dare. In the meantime, we opted to continue our game without Scarlet until she returned. It was my turn once again. I decided to continue my plan.

“Forest, truth or dare.” “Truth.” Perfect. “Who is your crush?” “Don’t have one right now.”

I hoped that Tangelo would continue the cycle. This question frequently began one.

“Cerulean,” she asked, seeming surprisingly hesitant, “truth or dare?” I hoped this would lead where I thought it would. “Truth.” “Who… who is your crush?” This was exactly what I was hoping for. And it was incredibly nerve-wracking. But I wasn’t going to back down now. Nervousness be damned, I was going to confess! “My crush…” I began, nervousness near overwhelming. “My crush is… it’s you, Tangelo. But I know you’re probably straight, so I haven’t told you… until now.”

Lime went silent, turning to Tangelo. Tangelo seemed even redder than usual.

“That…” she stuttered, clearly nervous about something. “That was… This is… I can’t believe…” She stopped, as though words were failing her, and then simply jumped forward and hugged me. As I sat there, about to hug back, feeling my face burning up, she whispered “I had a crush on you too.”

Lime sat there for a moment in awe, then finally let her excitement show, letting out an incoherent string of words, clearly excited that her friends had found love, and that she was there to witness it.

Now, to this day, that was still the greatest day of my life. Me and Tangelo are still together, two years later, and have really been through thick and thin. I mean, yeah, we did both explode in a car crash that one time, and it was easily the most terrifying moment of my life, since while me and her mum had recovered quickly enough, she was still completely unconscious, and had to have cybernetic replacements to save her life.

She made it through completely fine, especially due to Lime, now also known as Subject: LEVIATHAN, and her newfound mechanical abilities. ARACHNID went into the Operation that saved her life as well, which is where they got the name of Subject: ARACHNID. Now, me and Tangelo, who is now also known as Subject: AVIAN, like to make use of her new abilities of flight to fly around the sunset, me in her arms, away from the rest of the world. 

I am so glad I was able to meet her, and I love her with all my heart. She was my only friend when I had no others, and then as I got to meet her friends, I finally had a group I felt at home with.

Oh yeah, Scarlet did get back, she did get a fish, and I did slap ARACHNID with it. They were confused for a moment, but found it very funny as well. Good times!

[dezdigi]

hating myself so bad

would i have felt better if i had just let him apologize? why do i feel the need to prevent him from taking responsibility if i’m actually hurting? just because i’ve wronged him previously doesn’t mean he can’t do any wrong. but it twists in my head that i have to make up for and defend his actions to him and in my head even when it hurts because it’s my fault everything is screwed up now and i’m hurting and grieving im going crazy ahhhh

i feel like im still hurting from the argents over spring break where i believed he resented me so truly. and for the argument on his father’s birthday where i wasn’t doing enough to entertain his family but his resentment circles back to me not being able to handle anything and that i’m always just going through a hard time always. and whenever he says that it hurts me so deeply because i’m trying all the time to just be okay for myself, for my academics, and mostly for him because i don’t want him checking up on me all the time and for him to say it during an argument that i stress him out. but later in the argument he explains that he doesnt resentment and theres unsolved problems hes holding onto and that he recognized my efforts the whole time.

and it just hurt so bad because it would cut so deep to hear repeatedly that im always just not good even though i’m trying so hard.

i feel like i mess things up so bad whenever he praises me genuinely. to hear things like he thinks that i am genuine and pure or that i nurture him are so rare and for me to go and just mess everything up the next day

i hate myself for not being good enough to just be there without feeling my own feelings i hate it i just want to be happy with the person i love but it feels like my emotions are sabotaging me

[chillychive]

Thanks for the tag @noworneverphantom !

Are you named after anyone?

My legal name, nope. I was a double rainbow baby and came after 2 deaths in the family so my parents wanted something totally new for me. My chosen (soon to be legal!!!:D) name, is accidentally sort of after a character I love and relate to a lot. I was reading and someone called out the main character, by last name, and I suddenly had this “yea! I’m here!” Moment and I was like wait why did I respond to that-HOLY SHIT I FOUND MY NAME. It’s a funny origin story for sure. My middle name is up for debate still, but if I don’t keep my birth one, I’m going to change it to follow a family naming scheme that I think is hilarious and a good way to subtly follow family tradition.

When was the last time you cried?

Several weeks ago. Honestly, I wish I cried more. It’s very hard for me to cry. I saw the milky way for the first time and just started sobbing. I cried for nearly an hour, just kneeling and staring up at the sky. That may have been the first time i understood that tears aren’t always sad.

Do you have kids?

Nope. I’m too young and despite adoring small little children a lot, I’m not sure I’d ever want kids of my own. I’d be too scared to mess them up. I feel like I could be quite the good parent too, but I couldn’t deal with the stress. Maybe adopting, tho. I’m sure as hell not giving birth. Ever.

Do you use sarcasm a lot?

I used to be really sarcastic, but I’ve stopped using it as much now. I’m trying to use more positive language and open myself up more to people, and stopping being sarcastic except when I’m parroting back to my friends to show them how insane whatever they’re doing is (I have a bunch of workaholics that somehow adopted me that I often need to stop before they work themselves to death) has helped me a lot to do that.

What sports do/have you played?

Hm. Currently nothing, but I’ve done a lot of odd sports. Probably my most normal is volleyball, which I got pretty good at but I struggled with the people part of team sports and got bored. Before that, I did competitive archery (I wasn’t great, I didn’t practice a lot but I got my 250 pin at my last comp before my coach retired), and swim team (my first summer I was amazing at it, my most recent I sucked so bad but at least I can say with confidence that I have a very strong back stroke).

What’s the first thing you notice about people?

Their demeanor. I study people a lot (I’m very much the quiet kid who watches everything), and how they carry themselves and how they interact with others is usually the first thing I notice. Their general vibe.

What’s your eye color?

Good question. When I was little they were bright blue and they’ve gotten a bit darker as I’ve grown but still very blue. As I grew up tho, this yellow-green color spread from the inside (no, not jaundice I checked) and now they can look blue, grey or green depending on lighting. I wear glasses, sadly, so I can’t show off how weird my eyes are, but they are very weird, and kinda pretty.

Scary movies or happy ending?

I avoid scary movies at all costs. Me & my ocd brain cannot handle that. I have a very low tolerance for fear. Happy endings are kinda lame and I love screwing over the main characters at the end, but if I had to pick one or the other, happy endings by a long shot.

Any special talents?

I have random knowledge on many odd things, thanks to being a compulsive researcher and internet access. I have a double jointed toe, and jaw (idk either tbh). I can overthink my way into any situation. I can recognize any plant native to my area (edible plants phase when I was 11). I have abt 50% of needed knowledge on most topics. I know most basic codes and often will geek out and learn more. I’m not 100% accurate but I’ll definitely recognize and mostly understand how to solve most basic ciphers. Im also very good at crafts, especially yarn. I am uniquely talented at unraveling balls of tangled yarn.

Where were you born?

In a laboratory where they bred sentient capybaras. Interpret that how u wish. (/nsrs)

What are your hobbies?

Taking on too big projects, writing, drawing, painting, digital art, harassing my friends, singing, piano, rpg, Minecraft, basket making, there’s probably more but I can’t think.

Do you have any pets?

Not unless you count my sibling.

How tall are you?

5’11” im tall lol

Favorite subject in school?

Dang these questions keep getting harder. First you want to know about the lab I was made in, now my favorite school subject?! Probably government, or choir. Choir is my safe space, def my favorite place in school, and the teacher is amazing. Government is fascinating and has a great teacher. In theory, English, but in practice the class is either boring or stressful (basically me going from “ha this is beneath me I’m rlly good at writing” to “oh fuck they actually expect me to *write* things”), so I’m not a huge fan.

Dream Job?

I wouldn’t mind a painfully repetitive job as long as they don’t mind me listening to music/a podcast while I work. But I suppose that’s not a dream job. Perhaps a writer for a sci-fi show. Maybe even Star Trek or Star Wars. It would be fun to have something long running to play with. That would be a good use of my wide skill range and love of space and creating worlds. Or getting to create and mold my own show in that sort of realm to make something truly new (aka sci-Fi as I see it, which seems to disagree with a lot of current creators or sci-fi stories) and getting to watch it unfold would be so beautiful. Watching the worlds I’ve sculpted on spreadsheets and very complicated Google slides explode onto the screen, with all of their mess and people and joy and weird little critters and imaginative ways to make it more realistic would be the most amazing thing. I’d have a hard time not picking up the actors and just going “MY BABY, I MADE YOU!”

On that very weird note, I’m going to tag some people and go to bed. @sadmushroomgoblin @doublemegative @wantmeifyouwantme @dragons-in-spaceee @twincityhacker

(Sry for the double tag, Ik @noworneverphantom already tagged a lotta y’all)

[slytherinshua]

🍈!! i didn’t see ur last response to my ask i’m sorry zanna ://

i hope ur piano recital went well tho. i saw ur post ab ur lesson after n i hope ur not too stressed, but assuming it’s all out of the way i hope everything is more calm now!! what song did u end up picking? :0

and i saw ur post ab ur 300 followers event, and u shouldn’t stress urself w writing stuff. if nobody is paying u to write, u can (and should) write whatever u want at whatever pace. i read a couple of ur fics from groups i don’t stan n they’re still so fun and enjoyable to read even when i don’t really know who they’re about.

cheering u on quietly!! :)

melon!! its okay don't worry about it lol <33

uhm so actually had a breakdown this morning then told my piano teacher i wasn't feeling well and didn't do the recital or the lesson last minute so like screw that new piece as well who even knows anymore 😍 lol uhm... im okay now tho, I went to the coast, went to an aquarium with my family, saw an octopus and some fishies, went to the beach, got gelato and some cold tacos 😭 today had a redemption so i'm overall satisfied... still feel a bit guilty abt backing out of the recital but when i tell you i could not handle it today like 💀

yeah i had to continuously tell myself that it was okay if i wasn't feeling inspired the requests... tbh i've always been so used to never getting requests, so whenever i get them, they're really really special to me 😭 but now that i've gotten quite a lot, it's been a little overwhelming. but i'll take my time and write them when i want to and feel inspired and in the meantime write things i want to write!! <3

omg rly?? can i ask which ones lmao 😭 i kinda feel honoured like you read them even when ur not into the group?? :( that's so sweet 😭

thank you so much melon :( im always so happy whenever you pop into my inbox 🫶🫶 cheering u on as well!!

[diaryofa20somethingyogirl-blog]

what do i feel

well, for starters i really do not feel like a 20 something anymore.because i’m not. 

what a hatus. 

but maybe inside, emotionally, i am. 

i feel like..i cannot talk to you. anything i say or do that doesn’t sit well with you turns into an arguement, a break up, a walk away, a block. ironic given i feel we got this far through communication and with time, the communication or the attempt to communicate in large, fails us. 

i feel like.. this uncertainty is why i don’t feel comfortable enough to share more. this instability makes me feel like maybe i go through things alone and see how that pans out and i feel like..i feel like that makes me disappointed. in you, in us. maybe i had too much faith. 

i feel like..i feel like i want this because this was so massive.to go through.but i also feel like i’m scared to go through it again with you.. 

i feel like there’s resentment.yes, you read that right. resentment. i feel like there’s resentment because i went through it and it feels like just another thing that happens on the daily to everyone else but me, like i went to the store and didnt find my brand of yoghurt and i’m feeling too much over it and everyone’s thinking fucking hell get over it already. 

i feel pressure. i feel like theres so much pressure surrounding me because fuck it why do you even like babies and love so deeply because youre screwing yourself over and now look at you, (me), youre a fucking mess. youre a blithering idiot for not moving on.

i feel like crying when i think about the pressure, i feel like i’m hiding everything im feeling because its not approved of, because its ‘taboo’, i feel like i thought i could do it because i had you and i would have had you to go through it with me but what i didnt realise was there was a ticking timebomb on how much time i had with you to go through it with me and you’re frustrated too and thats added pressure and it just makes me feel undescribably alone. lost and alone. 

lost because i’ve never been here. i dont know what else life wants to throw at me but i hope to God it isnt this big and it isnt this painful because what if i have to go through it alone then? how will i survive when i feel so incredibly broken right now and i dont know how to get back up. 

i feel like writing my feelings doesnt help because it makes this lump form in my throat and i dont want to go there, my child is in the next room so no, i cannot cry, i cannot go there and today i didnt cry nor did i puke so please, anxiety aside, lethargy aside, please let this be a good day. 

i feel sad. i feel sad that a day where i’m lethargic and not puking, is a good day. 

i feel lost, i feel lost that i fear the one thing that made me so happy in my initial 23 years of life, the knowing i had a mini me coming out of me soon, that fear is inside me now.its a mixture of i want it but its too soon because i have yet to grieve my loss. 

i feel the loss. i feel it in every fiber of my being.i feel it in every crevice of my soul, in every dream i have, in every fantasy i create, in every 2 child family i see, i feel the loss. 

i feel the bond, between me and this entity, this beautiful being that is no longer, i still feel the bond. i long to love you. i wish you knew how much i did. 

i feel the longing. everyday, every minute , every second. i brush it away and make jokes and carry on so i can be socially acceptable again but i still feel you, i still think of you, i still miss you and i still love you.i will always love you, you who were part me and part a man i love. i will always be yours. 

i feel insecure. i don’t feel worthy of love for what happened, i find it hard to love myself. i critique every inch of my skin, i grieve for every imperfection that came with what happened, i grieve for what could’ve been. 

i feel the pressure.the pressure to be okay. 

and i feel the loss. the loss of your support.of being able to talk to you without you being frustrated and angry and walking away. 

i dont know who i miss more.the you i envisioned that would come out of this with me. the me i was before i went through this.or the soul that is lost, hopefully guarded by our beloved ones. 

[the-supernatural-rewatch-project]

s1ep1 "Pilot"

welp here we go again! the first episode of my two year long supernatural rewatch project! im pressing play, let to fuckery begin.

bullet points are thoughts as i watch, paragraphs are my closing comments!

Why do I pay money for amazon prime if they are gonna show me ads before what im trying to watch???

happy John Winchester feels incorrect, like where’s the assholery.

And poor Mary, dying for no good reason except to forward the plot.

AND FUCK AZELZEL or however you spell his name. They were so happy, they were a family!!! And yeah so what Mary was from a line of hunters or whatever BUT THATS RETCON!!!

god its been six?? years since I first saw supernatural but still the image of Mary of the dealing face screaming out in pain as the flames engulf the room is so chilling.

DAMN??? Sam got a 174 on the LSAT??? Good for him, i assume all I know about the lsat is from legally blonde.

justice for Jessica honestly, such a great girlfriend and Sam was a little shit.

Okay sam being all home defence over dean creeping around in the dark is kinda cute.

Sam and Jess were just a happy couple, Jess didn’t deserve all that.

“Dad hasn’t been home in a few days” “dads on a hunting trip, and he hasn’t been home in a few days” two sentences that make me regret starting this rewatch project.

“not normal, Safe” YEAH YOU TELL HIM SAM!!

I try and deny it but i am a sam girl.

DEAN TWENTY SIX??? oh my god, and still that attached to daddy.

Sam and Deans upbringing was basically a cult.

“you know there’s evp on that” yeah sam, its called static.

Sam should have become a lawyer. He wouldn’t be good, but it wouldn’t be hunting.

I LOVE YOU JESS, DATE ME NOT SAM!!! I would NEVER get you killed.

Oh yeah, this episode is a woman in white.

tits out, dead a fuck, “take me home” yeah I would 100% let her kill me.

Now that I remember this is a woman in white episode, i remember the plot of it. I actually really liked this episode’s monster of the week aspect. the woman in white was a compelling victim and perpetrator, and i really felt for her.

“it’s the greatest hits of mullet rock”

“driver picks the music, shotgun shuts his cake hole”

god I hate hate HATE the fbi badges, you two are babys, infants, CHILDREN!! Yall are NOT FBI agents!!!

“Why do you have to talk to police like that??” Damon Sammy? What kinda lawyer were you tryna become??

Oh yeah they are talking about dad again, this episode feels like it rapidly swings from feeling like any monster of the week episode of supernatural OR any plot driven episode.

um holy shit…. Dean shoving Sam against the pilled. Perhaps i know why wincest was the big ship until cas was introduced. (I mean like i dont ship it, but i can see why)

Okay the car driving itself was fun.

lmao dean at the edge of the river looking like a drowned fish is hilarious.

“you smell like a toilet” I’ve been reminded that supernatural wasn’t written for teen/young adult queer women and was actually written for white dudes.

“No chick flick moments” see my previous point.

“Jerk” “bitch” I hate this.

women in white are just so good, i love them.

ahhh the introduction of dads journal. The biggest problem solver in the entire fucking series.

this poor husband, kids gone, wife gone.

Jesus fucking christ, that jump scare jumped me scarred.

this poor girl, she just wants to go home.

kill him!!! I don’t want to watch another fifteen seasons of this horseshit

“Im taking you home” cringe alert 🚨

awww he’s not dead :(

Awww the kid ghosts :,(

wow that 2005 cgi does not hold up.

“If you screwed up my car, I’ll kill you” okay isnt the car the car that John brought Sam and Dean up in? How did the car become deans? John doesn’t strike me as the kind of guy to buy himself a new car when the old one will do, and he certainly isn’t the kind to give his kid his car.

JESS MY BELOVED DONT DIE

How did Sam and Jess afford this huge fucking apartment?

NOOOO SHES DEAD!!!

Well first episode done, i am not 0.00305810397% of the way done supernatural! Why have I cursed myself with this burden.

Overall I did really like this episode! I think that it does create intrigue into the storyline, while also introducing the monster of the week format. However I wish they did a better job a meshing the two together, it did feel like I was watching two separated shows that happens to smashed together. One monster of the week and one plot driven.

As for the monster of the week, I like women in white, i think they are a cool narrative function and aren’t region specific, they also aren’t indigenous folklore or spirituality significant / revered figures something that supernatural has a tendency to uh…. Lets say butcher, something that i can’t wait to deal with next episode.

For the arc’s plot I do think it does what it set out to do… introduce the plot of the show. Two brothers trying to find their father, who has gone missing. That’s really all I can say because honestly this arc was my least favorite the first time I watched supernatural I cant see that changing this time.