#and like probablly many others but these ones at this time

[koszmarnybudyn]

You know i do love me a cockroach of a man

[pizzapizzadickz]

..

.

[nonbinaryaubrey]

can you share some stuff about phantump Sunny..

OKOK i will . try. ITS VERY JUST LIKE. whats the term.. idk. kinda convoluted tho since its a side au of a different au (and theyre both WIP aus tooooo wauuugh)

putting this under the cut bc . erm. gets embarrassed talking about my own au. it feels a bit out there for an omori au concept so immmm. ueueu. scareds

but uhmm. I thiiink ive talked about my Zoroark Omori AU yeah? Branch AU of my PLA AU where Sunny (called omori in that au) ends up dying in hisui and becomes a zoroark, and after uh.. how ever many years the difference is between hisui and modern times is. ends up finding himself back in faraway town, and uhh. with how hisuian zoroarks kind of. are. and some other stuff i dont wanna make this post too long, he is not happy when he comes across his old friends and his past self again.

thiiis is where things kiiinda differ ?? bc like. ok. so the circumstances in the Zoromori au r kind of changed so it functions kinda like a time loop (Sunny gets eebied to hisui - dies - spends the next 100-200 years or so alone, becoming a BIT of a bitch. old man. - finds himself back in faraway town, during the time his friends were there - kiinda. probablly not completely intentionally, causes Sunny to get eebied to hisui. cycle repeats) so like. me and my friend were discussing ways to have this cycle break. we came up with a couple but one of the ways was having Sunny get. fucking killed thanks to Omori (again. probably not intentionally.?) leaading too ^_^ Phantump Sunny!! Omori kind of dumps his body off in the woods hoping no one will find it and either runs off or takes his place (it. it makes sense i promise he has reasons i just have trouble wording them) . idk ^_^

I think Basil probably ends up eventually finding him, but probably wouldnt recognize the phantump as Sunny, especially if like. Omori just started disguising himself as Sunny. Basil would have no reason to believe hes dead obv. He just has this weird little tree following him around all the time now its his new friend :) (unaware of the horrors)

SORRYSORRY this is a . poor explanation and, again, a bit of an out there au for omori.. its just kinda smth for me and my friend to mess around with .. i hoped u liked reading about it tho!! ik im coming across as very nervous but !! i am glad u asked about it :]

[konohamaru-sensei]

Ranger Reject!!! Please, I desire this knowledge!

My file started for everything Ranger Reject with Sayuri in there. Have many thoughts, but only wrote down a little angsty stuff so far.

In this AU Sayuri is a sort of delinquent, but since she lives in the slums she doesn't really have a choice, but to fight her way through to survive. When she meets Sousei she doesn't know who he is since shes been raised without a TV present (no money). They have a very biting relationship plus they really revel in beating other people up. Genuinly makes them hot.

Ok, I know Q probablly doesn't care, but for others passing by there are legti major plot spoilers hinted at under this cut so if you wanna read Ranger Reject / Go go loser ranger with pure eyes you should not check (and I recommend you do, because its awesome)

so explaination: for one reason or another sousei has only a bit of his memories, i dont wanna spoil the real big twist here but he did have amnesia for a bit. ill say nothing else.

_ “Should I cut your hair? You barely can see out of your eyes now.” She offers it in a tone of generosity, as if he should be thankful that she would think about the possibility of helping him for something.

Sousei pinches his nose. His hair does hang annoyingly into his face and he can’t remember it having ever been this long. But then again, he doesn’t remember much of his life anyway. “No,” he says, not  because he doesn’t want her to do it, but because he doesn’t want to give her the satisfaction of wanting her to do it. 

Theirs is a relationship of small wins and if she’d cut his hair, it would be her win and no way he’d let that happen.

“Fine, then enjoy not seeing anything”, Sayuri throws herself down next to him. The loud noise is probably audible in the room below them. 

Her manners are so bad, he wrinkles his nose. She knows that making noise on the roof of this very small, shabby house would be audible inside and that the others are sleeping and yet she still does it.

“Guess your parents never raised you right”, he finishes his thought out loud and almost laughs when he sees the black eyed stare that she gives him in reply. He counts it as his win that he made her mad.

“You know my brother raised me,” she grumbles. 

Of course he knows. Still, it’s always fun to see the way she frowns when he makes her say it out loud. Maybe it’s a little cruel, but when Sousei was young he was told you have to tease what you like, so he is half sure it’s ok.

The stars are visible from the slums, even with the lights of the city in the back. Sousei wonders about the impostor that acts on his behalf and how much he would love to sleep in a bigger bed, with more pleasant companions, preferably female, right now. But he can’t even really remember living in the city, not in the way it looks like anyway.

Then his eyes wander to Sayuri. “A keeper killed him right? Your brother?” He asks though he knows the answer.

She sighs. “Yes. I’ve told you that 10 times.” She has. They dragged her brother away from her in the early days of the invasion. They needed him for something, they had said and when he refused to leave her alone they hit him, hard. Sayuri had only been around 10 back then.

Sousei takes his eyes away from her. “Do you know which colour it was?”

“Red.”

He breathes out deeply. 

That could spell problems in the future.

“Why?” Sayuri asks and as he turns his face he realises she is only a few inches away from him. That makes him feel a little fuzzy, but he finds his personality again.

“I heard he is the most handsome,” he grins. “All the girls want him.”

Sayuri’s face sours and she moves backwards again and though he’d wanted her to give him more space, now part of him wishes she’d come back.

“I don’t know how he looks like,” she grinds her teeth together. “He is some kind of celebrity in the city, I am told, but I have never been there to see him.”

Sousei leans fully back on the tiles of the roof, the hair tickling on his nose. 

Lucky.

[itswellya]

i just had a story/book idea that i think would make a great tv show :)

So the tittle would be "the meet up univers"and its the story of character 1 (i dont have names yet so i'll refer to them as c1) and character 2 (same thing as c1 so im gonna reffer to them as c2) mainly. ofc there would be other characters around them and some of those would join the main-character-group but it would be mostly focused on them so the story would be that c1 and c2 are very close friends (im considering maybe making it a romance? eventually?) (also "friends" is an understattment and we're talking about soulmates platonic or romantic, you choose) and they can travel between universes.

One day something goes wrong and they have to slit up (maybe when things go wrong, c1 wanted but couldnt protect c2 and it just makes eveything more ansgty?) but thats ok because a long time ago they had decided on one universe where they would go if anything like that ever happened.

so c1 goes to that universe and finds c2 but c2 doesnt know who they are and doenst even know that multiverse traveling is a thing

so c1 has to deal with the most important person in their life being gone but there at the same time while also fixing what went wrong.

it would probablly be a really big thing that could make all universes collapse (because if its a small personal problem then c1 could just leave c2 and deal with it on their own yk) (and we dont want that)

and im still working on it but the big problem would probablly be that by traveling in so many different universes, c1 and c2 connected all of them together which unbalanced everything (bc they arent suposed to travel in the first place) and all the universes were reset

which is why c2 doesnt remeber anything and in fact has never lived any of the adventures c1 and c2 went trough. because they got "reset"

also there would (obviously) be a reason why c1 can remeber everything and im thinking that maybe c1 is like the multiverse incarnate (????) and is the one that gave c2 the ability to travel in the first place (bc c1 was lonely and wanted a friend)

but maybe c1 doesnt know that and its like a big reveal at the end of part one. Like they learn what they are and they have to deal with that too

anyway so yeah. c1 and the new c2 go along very well (obviously. they're soulmates duh) and c1 is more or less open about their friend/relation ship with the old c2 to the new c2

like they don't hide what happened to the new c2 but doesnt go in the details bc they don't want to pressur the new c2 to be the old c2 (idk if that makes sense)

and the story would be very nice and sweet and a bit angsty but that's ok bc it's ok to struggle with stuff

anyway, i think it would be great so yeah

also that was a loooong ass post but yeah who cares :)

[salorade]

Mask, bound, break

THANK YOU FOR THE ASK!!! Asks of tumblr are/were always my favorite most indulgent thing online. >:D

I have NOT done a good job info-dumping (if any at all!) on tumblr about my OCs-- and i have too many to tell-- so I'll use this time to answer about Maso since he and gang are the OCs i havev spent a considerable amount of brainpower thinking about(he is a deepseaprisoner fan oc) -- and also do a double and do Blorbo, who has nothign to do with maso and friends but he is a guy in my icon.

mask: Does your OC wear a mask, literally or figuratively? What goes on beneath it? Is there anyone in their life who gets to see who they are under the mask?

Maso: Not quite figuratively-- as in, he puts on an act but at the same time he doesn't really put an act on. I wouldn't call him genuine, but I wouldn't say he's hiding a truer self. When he's sad, he'll try to escape it with substances and jokes. The two people who do see under his pretense would be his right-hand demon whom he has spent a considerable amount of time with (unhealthy coping mechanism), and his god whom he used to be in love with (they're a bit of the 'two sides of the same coin' in a very metaphorical way, they can't stand each other anymore but without the other all would perish)

Blorbo: A mask hiding a mask hiding a mask hiding a mask hiding a mask. Figuratively, though if you'd cut his face open there would probably be a hole instead of a skull.

bound: Has your OC ever been imprisoned or captured? What happened? How did they get out? Did the experience leave any scars?

Maso: No. He wouldn't be unkind to it though. In the canonical universe, he and his good god broke up because (NoT quite because, more like it was what broke the camels back) maso's demon named Laplace ate sado's head and most beloved angel (laplace had. social anxiety and he wanted to be friends). Sado punished Laplace by putting him into a deep slumber / dream. and so on and so on, maso gets mad at that's almost about it. -- In An Alternative Universe, if Sado were to kill Laplace instead of sleep, Maso would be violent. He would attempt at some point to imprison his god in fits of broken revenge. Sado would say nothing during this time, and would be let go only when maso breaks down further to realize what he is doing.

Blorbo: Ok. I've never really thought about it, but a guy who looks like anyone's favorite character must have been captured at least more than once. Have you seen those One Direction wattpad fics? I didn't but I'm pretty sure one would include kidnapping. Blorbo can probablly receive some damage in slapstick senses, but I don't think he can truly get wounded. When he dies, he teleports all brand-new to another part of the world/universe/whatever. What a guy.

break: What would cause your OC to break down completely? What do they look like when that happens? Has anyone ever seen them at their lowest?

Maso: If his god would get beaten up he'd be really upset. Similarly, he often gets genuinely upset at the words of his god even if sado says something anyone else would say and wouldn't be a problem. I'm blanking out on the exact specifics of how you could get him to break down completely. he has things that gets him mad but they get him mad in a passive aggressive way where he still has control over the situation. I think it really is all reliant on his god, for something like a complete breakdown. I know in a Roleplay , Maso fed his heart to someone. I dont remember why but I do remember Sado almost died due to getting beaten up (IN RP, where these guys interact with outsiders -- they're so weak compared to others. roleplay isnt really canon for their universes except some times). Uhmm has anyone ever seen him at his lowest... yes the same as the mask question, good Othello and dear Sado would be the only confidants to know. I do think Maso (and mr. Sado too in fact) would hate being in his lowest or showing real weakness.

Blorbo: I think if you would push him to have his own identity or strip him of what he is, he would break down because he is in fact nothing outside of his looks (sexyman) -- OR that is how he would feel, adding this as i think about it more. I think he would also get frustrated if the pressure rises about how he's doing. I wonder if he would glitch like a video game! maybe somehow has seen him at his lowest. He'd probably explode and revive somewhere else.

[buzzbuzzbumblingby]

Sunday, july 25, 2021

i woke up to the pounding sounds of an engaged toddler and unimpressed with my night sleep, even with CBD help. alas it is just the inner conflict. I need alone time so I come down to rest with coffee and bacon. There is so much heat and light outside -- waiting to be embrased and appreciated -- in due time.

___

Listening to Cageless Birds new intrumental album and it is (gladly) not what i fully expected -- realigiously wise. “the Clarity Winter Brings” brought an instant picture to my mind. wow how the creativity flows within me now. I can feel the true, high significance in the recetn (&future) pieces.

I am in awe -- not of myself -- but of the conductivity! I had a remembrance/flashback to my youth and all I saw Spiritually and knew instinctively. The prophetic was insanely strong and correct. I specfically thought about how I wrote down the names of songs on my future albums. The names (of 8) were forgotten to my adult mind but I did write and name several (4) in similarity! Wow - how did such pre-knowledge flow so well? Or has it just stuck in my subconscience? Was it because I was in deep survival mode and needed to plan ahead; so that made me more open to the channel (of future things)? -- Probablly. Perhaps a factor but I am not convinced of that entirity.

I would like to be even just partially that open again. It is entirity is exhausting and overwhelming; so much to hold and figure where to store/give/forget. I should have written it all down but the young always think they wil remember.

Alas, when i should remember/be reminded, I am and do in it’s entirity. Perhaps that is the best mehtiod as to not be overwhelmed......

____

I keep dreaming/thinking/anxiety about my dad saying we need to talk, and him to say he is seeing someone. Is that not a good thing?  I think he should be happy and do not feel against i; but it is a new concept. Maybe my brain is processing it.

ON the other paternal front: jeffie was in one of her “I told you so/I am wiser/.........idk how to explain her vibe......... like “I am aware,wise,in control,in better-ness bc I know” state of mind/spirit. I have seen this digusting air/vibe on her before, many times, it is annoying bc IT IS FALSE! SHE KNOWS NOTHING!!!! She was saying “remember your prophetic dream about the usa...well that time is now.” *pause* IS IT? OH REALLY? YOU ARE PART OF THE PROBLEM AND THE UGLY STAIN GOD WNATS TO END! YOUR “HOLIER THAN THOU” ATTITUDE IS UNFOUNDED. YOU CANNOT EVEN THINK FOR YOURSELF. YOU CANNOT AND WILL NOT EVEN HLEP YOURSELF -- HOW IN THE HELL DO YOU THNK YOU SHOULD EVEN BE ON THE “RIGHT” SIDE OF THINGS?! I SAW THE VISION - I DID THE WORK - I, MYSELF, KNOW NO TIMELINE EVEN WITH ALL I SAW/SEE -- HOW DO YOU THINK YOU COULD KNOW/SEE WITH THOSE MASSIVE BLINDERS ON!?!?!?! DISGUSTING. ABSOLUTELY VILE ATTITUDE.

to say i was annoyed would be an understatement.  I was annoyed with such attitude at my younger age also and now as I name it again, more so I feel disgust. anyway she contiuned, “you need to be aware..you should make sure you write these things down...”   YES AND?    she is in the vibe of “I am giving you advice/instruction (you wouldn’t have otherwise) ((as your mother and thats my job)).”   NO   you are giving yourself false motherly accomplishents and pride. YOUR WORDS ARE EMPTY.    just as your care of me as a child. In my mind, you never have a leg to stand on. yo

[yn-x-animeboy]

Jungkook x y/n (as a famous artist) Pt.3

sinopsis: You are a popular artist in America, pretty famous, loved and well-known by the general public (actually you were one of the top 10 artists in the world but you are pretty humble and naïve to realize your popularity), one day during one of your fan meets you talk about how much you love BTS, and not only how you wish to meet them and work with them but how Jungkook is one of your celebrity crushes. During the meet you fangirled with other ARMYs in the crowd; video clips of you fangirling and talking about BTS at your meet where posted and reposted all over social media. This obviously broke the internet because you were not only a famous singer but you also were always accepted and loved by ARMY and this made a lot of people happy. Suddenly it felt like everyone wanted you to meet the seven handsome and talented idols and collaborate, but you could only wish, you believed they didn't even know who you were...or so you thought

pairing: reader x Jungkook

genre: fluff, romance, for entertainment purposes

BTS x Fem Reader

Parts: 1 here & 2 here

---

Part: 3 - The Jimmy Fallon Show

A couple of months have passed since your fan meet episode went viral and since BTS saw the video too. A lot has happened since then tbh, you kept working hard, you just put out your 5th studio album which is doing amazing in the charts, it reached no.1 for album of the year and 3 of your songs stand in the first places amongst other artists on the top 100 songs as well. BTS have also been working on music and projects, not a lot of time for you all. 

Even though it has been a long time since your ‘fan meet’ episode was aired  the media still brings up your episode highlights where you talk about BTS, it is not another really, it doesn't seem to affect you. Neither you or BTS have openly spoken about this to the general public, to them, it seemed like a cute exchange between you and your fans where they got ‘close and personal’. The only difference now is that your fans and ARMYs now have a ship name for you and Jungkook, and they still wish their ship could sail someday….

Thanks to the success your album has had in the short time it was published, you have been invited to multiple talk-shows to promote your new music and to basically catch up with the media. As an artist the whole publicity thing is important for your team and company. Even though it can be hard to ‘do press’ as a celebrity, you enjoy it and always do your best for your supporters. Your fans and everyone who became a fan of your infamous episode would troll around twitter writing things like ‘will BTS be on this show appearing with y/n?’ ‘AYe y/n watch out, they are going to surprise you with BTS’; but you didn't really have time to see them, only your team was aware. Your days working + rehearsing + promoting don't really give you time to scoop around your social media.

Today on your schedule: The Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon. Tonight you will be performing and having an interview for the show. You love this show so much, you have been invited before,  and you really feel comfortable on set in the company of Jimmy and his team/staff, they are always super nice and welcoming. You haven’t been there for an interview in a while and you are excited. (Even though it went viral, and it was your fantasy, the whole “I WISH I COULD MEET BTS AT A TONIGHT SHOW” was not really on your mind today, probablly because of how hectic your day was. You woke up super early and took a flight on your jet to New York, then you went to rehearsal to rehearse the song you’ll be performing tonight, went to the hotel and took a shower, went to two important business meetings for your record company, barely had time to eat, then went and had hair and makeup done for an afternoon interview for a radio show and finally some rest before you went to the Jimmy Fallon studio)

The Tonight Show starts at 10:00pm but you have to get there earlier to greet Jimmy and the staff, to quickly rehearse your performance, to go over details about the show, get ready, etc. You arrive on set at around 6:00pm in sweatpants, a baggy Ariana Grande merch T-shirt, sneakers and fresh hair from your second shower today. You walk through the door next to your personal bodyguard Lee and Manager Sam, followed by your stylist Meg behind you, you look around to see if you could recognize any familiar faces, The camera crew were setting up their high budget equipment, staff members cleaning, running around and preparing for tonight's live interview. Jimmy comes out from behind a door with casual clothes and messy hair, nothing like his sleek professional look on TV. Smiling he greets you and your team; he takes a step forward and hugs you tightly “Hi y/n it’s so nice to see you, it has been a while we have missed you, ever since your interview was scheduled for this week the staff has been excited to see you again, including me, you are one of our favorite guests to have over i swear” you look at him sweetly with hands on your chest from his hind words (the reason why they loved you so much was because you were different from other celebrities on the show, you were always super polite and nice to the staff and took time out of your schedule to greet everyone and introduce yourself, even though you were one of the biggest stars in the world you humble personality attracted many). “Omg stop Jimmy you are so sweet, I love your show so much it’s always an honor, thanks again for inviting meI wanna say hi to the staff, can I?” You said; Jimmy has been like a mentor to you when it comes to interviews and press, he was one of the first people to believe in you and interview you when you debuted. “Yes of course you go ahead, I’ll talk with your manager while you do so to catch up.” (They were good friends too)

While Jimmy and Sam catch up, and your stylist and bodyguard follow an assistant to put your stuff in the dressing room; you walk around introducing yourself to the staff; you visit the camera crew, the audio booth, the lighting crew, the producers, the PD, the meeting room, even the cafeteria. This helped you also to loosen up and feel more comfortable and confident for the show. After the greeting you quickly rehearsed with your talented backup dancers for the performance to get used to the ‘stage’ and the spacing.

One of the sweet staff members you just met offered to show you to your dressing room where Lee, Sam and Meg were waiting for you. You entered the spacious dressing room and sat at a small couch next to Lee (he was your bodyguard but sometimes even acted like a father/guardian to you, you were thankful you had a close connection with your team) You treated them all, including your dancers, to a mini banquet of food from the cafeteria and chatted about nothing before you had to start getting ready. Sam started getting constant phone calls, as your manager he was constantly busy on the phone, he ignored a couple of them but the caller seemed insistant, Sam saw the caller ID and shot up and ran outside to answer. “Ey no phones on the table mister” you teased as he was halfway out the door, he flipped you off and you back at him and proceeded to finish your snack; “Who would be so insistent, the company handles the calls when Sam has something to to with y/n… this interview has been scheduled for a month now…” Meg, your stylist commented, but you just just shrugged her shoulders as you swallowed the last bite of your sandwich, not really thinking too much about it. You stood up to brush your teeth after finishing eating. (what you failed to notice was Lee making a face to Meg basically telling her to ‘shut up’.... they knew something you didn’t but you didn’t see said interaction at all)

After 20-30 mins Sam came back as if nothing happened, you were now sitting in front of the large vanity mirror and Meg staring at your hair behind you. “Is everything okay Sammy?” You asked, thinking the call could be from a family member or an emergency, judging on the time it took. “No, yes- um it was just a catch up call, apparently the company did not answer their call in my place so they called me directly ignoring the fact that I was here with you.” he spoke. “Ah yeah, well that's good, well we finished our food and cleaned up so the girls (referring to the 2 backup dancers) and I could start getting ready but I left you and Lee some cookies and coffee on the table” you said pointing to the small coffee table in front of the couch that was previously filled with food, Lee, a 6’5 tall man sitting in a tiny couch with a cookie on his right hand and coffee on his left making space for Sam to sit next to him. cute. 

You finish getting ready, hair done simple and comfortable for your interview and later performance, light natural makeup letting your natural beauty show off and fancy yet comfortable outfit that allows you to sit and dance comfortably. You felt really pretty and powerful. It was 9:30, only 30 mins before The Tonight Show started. before The live audience was allowed inside the studio you went over your dance quickly to make sure your outfit was safe to dance in, to make sure the music was the right one and to let the camera crew plan out their shots for the dance and interview segments. Once again you bought your head towards the staff and wished them good luck and a good show, you introduced yourself to the live band that accomplies Jimmy for the show as well and went backstage again for the final touch ups and waited for your turn to come out.

----

“.... and now here is your host...Jimmy Fallon'' he was introduced as the audience clapped for him and he walked across the set to his desk. “Hi, everyone, and welcome to THE TONIGHT SHOW!!!” The crowd cheered again for Jimmy. “Normally we have multiple guests on this show and from 10:00 pm to 12:00am we talk to multiple guests but today is a little different, today we have a very very special guest who will be with us. the. full. show!!!” The audience was comforted by a lot of your fans since it was announced you would be the guest tonight they prepared, and as soon as they heard this immediately stood up and cheered knowing it was you he was talking about. “She is one of my favorite artists, she is the sweetest, most talented artist today. Everyone welcome…. y/n'' The crowd went crazy as you came out from behind the curtain. Seeing everyone you bowed down to the audience and waved your hands, then you took Jimmy's hand to help you up the steps to the couch next to his talk show desk and sat down again bowing your head and mouthing ‘thank you’ to the still cheering audience.

“Wow the people love you y/n'' Jimmy said. “Hahaha no, stop, Thank you all, I love you so much I don't deserve you all.” you said blushing a little from the overwhelming support. The interview started normally, Jimmy introduced you properly to the camera and audience, you spoke about yourself and answered the general questions (‘What have you been doing these days?’ ‘Tell us about your album’.... blah blah)

After a couple of questions you did a fun activity with Jimmy where you created a funny sketch similar to the ones on SNL, you followed the lines on the promter and it came out to be a really funny and light activity to interlude the show. Then after a small break you went back to your seats and continued the Q&A.

“It's crazy, y/n’s latest album is the number one album in the country and she also holds the first, second and third spots for the billboard top 100 hits. You even broke a record for this, to being the youngest and first woman to ever achieve this.” Jimmy said as you smiled and looked at the cheering crowd. “Its crazy, I never thought one day I could even hold a place in the top 100, and now I actually hold 3 places plus another 1st place for album of the country, Thank you all so much for supporting me, this would've happened if it wasn't for all of the people who supported my music, Thank you for giving my music a chance.”

“So actually the next billboard award show is tomorrow, and y/n, we heard you are going to be performing.. is that so?” Jimmy smoothly transitioned form question to question, topic from topic. “Yeah I was blessed to not only be nominated for an award but to also be invited to perform for the ceremony, I am so excited, It is an honor, it not my first time performing at the billboard’s but I have so much fun every time, hopefully the audience will like my performance and the other guest performers of the night, I can’t wait.

“What are you performing tomorrow y/n?”, “Shhh it’s a surprise Jimmy, I can give you a little spoiler, I am performing one of my new album’s songs, it is one of my favorite songs on it” You smoothly avoided actually answering what song you would be performing tomorrow. “Mhm okay how about you tell me in secret during the commercial break I have to know…” Jimmy insisted “Sure Jimmy I’ll tell you”. “Okay so guys let's go to a short commercial break, but don’t leave cause when we are back y/n will be performing live, don't you miss it!” Jimmy said and waved with you as the producer called for the commercial break. 

After the commercial break you got to perform one of your hit songs next to your back up dancers, you let yourself go to the music and enjoyed the performance; you really got lost in the music and dancing every time you had an audience, you loved this so much. After your performance you received a standing ovation form the people present on set, Jimmy went over from his seat to you, he congratulated and complimented you. He then guided you to your seat and gave you some water; he made some ads/sponsorship bits while you grabbed some air and while Meg retouched your hair and makeup while the cameras weren’t on you.

Jimmy then came back after another small break to proceed with the interview: “So y/n I actually wanted to talk to you about something really big” you made a face at Jimmy’s word choices (you had somewhat of a dirty mind) “Hahahaha, Don't make that face y/n, it's not what you think… God.. what a dirty mind you have; I meant I wanted to talk to you about something that recently happened and I’m sure everyone wants to have an update on'' Jimmy made himself clear. “Hahahaha oh, okay sure, tell me” 

“A couple of months ago you went viral on social media after you talked about BTS on one of your episodes, and your fans and ARMYs went crazy, not gonna lie even I got excited” As soon as you heard Jimmy say “BTS'' your face dropped making the audience giggle at your reaction, you started to get anxious. “Hah-, um yeah that happened, I didn't expect for it to become such a big thing tbh Jimmy” you said.

“So in the episode you got asked by one of your fans something about how you would want to meet them or something and you mentioned how you would like to meet then on a talk show… like this one” Jimmy said with a smug expression taking over his face. You quickly spoke before he could say something else “Omg Jimmy stop, I swear if I look behind this couch and BTS is hiding behind it I will have a heart attack, please don't play with me, I’m not ready, stop that''

 The crowd and Jimmy laughed at your cute panic. “Don’t worry y/n, no, I swear they are not there” Jimmy treasured. “IDK MAN, I’m gonna look behind the couch….” you dared; “Go ahead y/n” Jimmy fired back; this made you more nervous, you made a ‘I’m tough’ face at Jimmy and moved your body sideways, “If there is someone behind here I will run Jimmy, I. WILL. RUN. I don’t know where or how far but I will run out..” Jimmy and the audience laughed again and stopped as you looked behind the couch….. and…… there behind the couch…… there was…….. nothing. You started laughing as you went back to your original sitting position, the audience looking curiously at you. “Hahahaha ahhhh there is nothing there” whipping some laughing tears off the inner corner of your eyes you looked at Jimmy who was too laughing at you. “I told you y/n! ahahahah”

Jimmy looked at the camera and directed to the audience “For the people who don’t know what we are talking about and/or haven't seen y/n’s latest episode we have some clips for you” You looked at Jimmy and at the crew wanting to refuse due to your embarrassment, you felt exposed. The video played on the screen, the screen was split so that while the episode clips showed on screen your reaction could also be seen at the same time. Only a small trailer was played, which made you confused, you thought they would play the clips where you deeply talk about BTS…

The video stopped and the audience clapped, “Well that's just a small trailer of the full episode if anyone would like to go over and watch it it was pretty fun… I really enjoy ‘y/n’s camera roll’ episodes, I highly recommend” you smiled and appreciated the free proportion but you went anxious again as Jimmy spoke, “But y/n I actually have a small surprise for you, actually BTS saw your episode and reacted to it on camera…” You went stiff…. he said what???? BTS saw your video? they learned who your where?.... wait. THEY SAW THE VIDEO????? THEY SAW YOU FANGIRLING OVER THEM AND THIRSTING OVER JK AND HERD YOUR STUPID FANTASY????

 “OMG Jimmy no…. AHHH no….” You said as realization dawned on you and you covered your face with your hands.

“oh y/n yes… and we have the video of their reaction here, for the first time ever, an exclusive for the Tonight Show…. watch the screen y/n'' The screen was again split to show your reaction + the video. You lifted your face from your hands and held on to Jimmy’s hand on the desk, bracing yourself for further embarrassment and probable rejection. The video played: 

(BTS reacting to your episode. {the bullet points are your ‘present day’ reactions to BTS reacting to you})

The video started . “Oi, it’s y/n'' Jin immediately said as soon as your face appeared on their screen, “Is this a new episode?” Jimin asked out loud, “Wait what day is it? they normally go up on Friday, did we miss it?” Taehyung spoke.

“OMG no way, they know who I am, omg I’m crying Jimmy” You actually started tearing up and Jimmy squished your hands tighter as he read the subtitles added (you understood Korean).

“Hello everyone welcome to another episode of…. f** I don't even know what we call these videos, jajajaja” “Wait what?... jajajajaja omg guys thank you, I'm so sorry, yeah you heard them, welcome back to y/n’s camera roll, I can’t believe I forgot that, anyway today’s episode is a little different……” the boys chuckle at your genuine personality “hahaha gwiyeoun” (haha cute) Suga added, J-Hope agreeing with him as he gave Suga a piece of the food he was having. Kookie was currently watching the screen not even blinking, he hadn’t taken a bite out of his noodles or a sip out of his banana milk, Jimin noticed and pointed at him looking back at the guys with a silent laugh.

You kept crying and making faces reacting to them every time they spoke

“Hi, y/n, can I ask you another question?” “I saw that you liked an instagram post about BTS a while back uploaded by a fan account and I also saw that you actually follow their personal twitter account. ALSO in your behind the scenes video for your music video shoot you can be seen in the background dancing the Boy with luv choreo. So I wanted to ask if you were an ARMY and if you know them personally? and like should we be expecting a collaboration soon?”

“No way….Omg what she says she hates us” Jimin said. “Imagine if she said she hates us, is this why you guys are making us watch this?” Suga looked  at the staff.

“OMG I could never, NO omg how could I hate them” you commented wiping away your tears and back to squeezing Jimmy’s stretched hand on the desk

 “Can we keep watching hyungs…” Jungkook said looking around at the others, a bit desperate to find out what you said next. “Oi, wouldn't you want to know guki…” Jin teased him, wiggling his eyebrows and slapping the back of his head playfully. Before Jungkook could fight back RM reached over them and pressed play, preventing a ‘playful’ fight between the youngest and oldest member to take place.

You froze at the interaction between Jungkook and Jin… but kept watching not wanting to overthink it.

“OMG hahaha I love you so much, what an amazing question, Okay so first off no I don’t know them personally and sadly no plans of collaboration are on sight. Oh wow I have never been asked if I liked BTS before, I’m excited hahaha. Yeah I am an ARMY, I love them so much I am one of their biggest fans, and they are also one of my biggest inspirations when it comes to work ethic and professionalism, listening to them or watching them gives me motivation to keep doing what I love, which is this. anyway I am rambling I should stop; you guys can say y/n stop whenever I start rambling okay? hahaha''

RM stood up with hands on his head; Jin and J-Hope held on to each other with their mouths wide open looking at the screen; V was still sitting in the same spot, frozen, as if he was paused in time along with the now paused screen; Suga stood up with his hands on his mouth bouncing his knees lightly; Jimin reached to RM behind him and stretched his arms out with a ‘Did you hear that?’ expression; Jungkook leaned over the table and pulled the screen closer, he was smiling from ear to ear letting out a small “wow” under his breath, then he replayed your answer to listen to it one more time, rereading the subtitles under the video making sure he did not miss any words.

You chuckled at their individual reactions and resumed your crying at their reactions because you couldn’t believe they knew you and could be so cute towards a video of you

 “y/n Okay so, who is your favorite member?” “Well first off, I don't have a favorite member. I really mean it when I say this. I love them all equally and I love them all as a group. I don’t prefer one over the other or like one better.  I really do support them equally. I mean there is nothing wrong with having a bias, as long as you also respect the other members, hope that all made sense lol” Everyone seemed moved by your support towards them and nodded.

Again the boys reacted, they were so surprised they paused again and walked back and forth making sounds of excitement

Jimmy smiled proudly at you and helped you wipe a tear with a tissue 

“Y/n so you don’t have a favorite, but do you have a crush on any of them?, like if you could date one of them right now, which one do you pick?” A fan asked. “okay...well...Like I said just to be clear I don't have favorites amongst the group members, but I do have a type…. I consider one of them to be my celebrity crush”......“So in that case, if I had to pick someone that I would date in real life...i would say…. Jungkook” 

You put your forehead on Jimmy’s desk, you felt embarrassed, you knew what was coming, the audience was also reacting along and they got super excited at this part. You were scared over what BTS would think/say about this.

The. Guys. Went. Nuts. Jungkook immediately stood up and lifted his hands up in the air as if he had won an award, he paused the video and started smiling like crazy; 

A staff member spoke to Jungkook on the video : “How do you feel Jungkook?” He lifted his face from his hands and ran his fingers through his hair, his eyes were glossy and his smile wide. “I-I don't know what to say, I can’t believe it,” he said as he sat down looking  at the pause screen, looking at your still image. His hyungs patted him on the back; Jimin turned his head to the staff as he was rubbing JK’s back with one hand, “You know Jungook has had the biggest crush on y/n for so long now” Jimin told the staff. 

you completely froze, you started shaking, Jimmy was looking at you happily, the audience was going crazy, even the crew was invested in the k-drama worthy content. You went numb, you kept looking at the screen frozen.

Jungkook looked up and spoke to the staff: “Yeah I remember listening to her debut song for the longest time without really thinking about who the artist was. When her first studio album broke records I decided to look her up, I watched a video of her talking about the album and her experience as a new artist and I think ever since then I have had a crush on her; she is my ideal type”

Everyone was going crazy in the Tonight Show studio. EVEN Jimmy let go of you and stood up pacing around his desk, no one was expecting this. You came out of your trance as Jimmy shook you and you wiped more tears clouding your vision.

“Why is she your ideal type?” a staff member in the back asked JK. “Ha. um. well  I think my ideal type of girl is someone who is funny and has a bright and cool personality; someone who as soon as they step into a room they immediately light it up; someone who is goofy and isn't afraid to become a joke or mess up; A confident person; someone who isn't too girly or too boyish; someone who likes to learn new  things and from who I can learn new things too; someone who is younger than me; Someone who loves dancing and singing a lot, etc. And y/n is kinda all that and more tbh; 

You felt like you were dreaming… Totally forgetting you were on live television. The butterflies in your stomach felt more like birds. your heart pounding out of your chest and body glued to your seat.

The video of you time skipped again to the ‘fantasy’ answer’: “Okay so, my literal fantasy is to one day meet them at a talk show, you know how hosts like to surprise their guests with something/someone they like?, I believe Ellen has done it multiple times where she surprised a guest with their idol or celebrity crush, you know?” The group nodded, invested in your fake scenario “Well i would be invited to like the Jimmy Fallon Show, where he would just randomly surprise me with BTS. Then I would be given the opportunity to introduce myself and tell them how much I love and support them. I would also be able to show them my korean speaking skills, I learned Korean and Spanish back in school and I have never been able to actually use either them, lol, anyway...well after that we would all become really good friends, and we would collaborate and put out one or multiple songs for you guys. I mean that's basically it, I wish I could meet them, and become their friend and write songs with them, even produce songs with Suga or RM if I could'' 

you cringed at the sound of your voice, you were so embarrassed. The audience, crew and Jimmy found this and your reaction to be so adorable.

“What???? does she speak korean?” / “OMG Jungkook is she speaks korean marry her” / “OMG I wanna meet her now”  / “That's so cute” / “She is so cool” 

oMg, even after the video stopped you kept crying and sobbing, it almost felt like you had made it in life, you curled into a ball, you didn't care if you were live or not.

(end of video, camera was back to you and Jimmy only)

“y/n this is amazing, this was my first time watching the video too, how do you feel, hahahaha stop crying this is good y/n” He rubbed your hand and passed you a new tissue from his desk. You cleaned yourself up and accepted a new water bottle from a crew assistant.

“I- I’m at a loss for words Jimmy, I cannot even process it; I love them so much hahaha” You sniffed and looked at Jimmy innocently. “By the way I am so sorry for crying like this, ew I’m a mess right now, I so sorry for anyone watching” 

“No no, you are good, your fans love you and love to see the real you; right guys?” Jimmy said looking at the crowd and once again they all cheered for you, this made you happy and you smiled again. “Thank You all so much, thank you to anyone involved in the making of this reaction video and this segment of the show AND FOR WHOEVER ADDED THE SUBTITLES FOR THE STUDIO hahaha, I am so happy, I want to keep crying but I will compose myself for now and once I go home cry some more hahaha” 

“Y/N so obviously you are an ARMY, would you mind playing a small game with me?...” You nodded at Jimmy. “Okay so after the break we will be back  with y/n, and she will prove how big of an ARMY she actually is…”

Another commercial break was called, Meg again came over and cleaned you up, she fixed your hair and makeup and then made you change into some sneakers (you performed in heels), fresh sweatpants and a shirt that compliment your figure. Your manager told you that for the next segment you needed comfy clothes. You had so much in your mind right now you didn’t even question it.

“Okayyy and we are back everybody, so right now as you can see y/n has changed into a more sporty outfit, right y/n?” you looked at him and at the camera and answered back. “Yeah, i’m in my natural form now” you said as you modeled your comfy wear

“So today I will put your BTS knowledge to the test, I will play a snippet of a BTS song, to your right you have two buttons ‘dance button’ or ‘sing’ button; you can either dance to the part being played when you hit the dance button or keep singing the song if your hit the ‘sing’ button.” Jimmy challenged you as he explained the next activity, to the left of you a small table with both buttons and a mic was set up, you accepted and started the challenge; the game went like this; Dynamite, dance; Mic Drop, dance; No more dream, dance; Daechwita, sing/rap; the crowd was super hyped and Jimmy was loving your energy and the way you executed the songs perfectly, suddenly you recognized Euphoria being played, you clicked the sing button and you started to complete the lyrics as the music was switched to ‘karaoke mode’… you started to sing and suddenly you heard a voice behind you singing with you, and you couldn’t even turn around to prove yourself you were not mistaken, you knew that voice too well, the live audience was losing it, the crew looked excited, you went numb, you looked back and it seemed like a joke, a complete dream…..

The seven guys were coming out from behind the curtain, being led by Jungkook, he was singing the bridge of the song, mic in hand and just looking at you. Your knees gave out and you curled on your knees as you cried on your knees, ‘there is no way’, you could even begin to process what was going on, The boys were a little shy and stayed behind you as Jimmy lifted you from the floor and made you look at them.....

----

PART 4 > HERE

AHhhh I love this part hahahhaha

Hope you liked it. PArt 4 is up; please give me a lil <3 if you liked this. :) Xx

[lol-jackles]

OK, I just heard that Jensen had been talking to Kripke for several years about collaborating on a new show, and that Kripke actually customized the Soldier Boy part for him prior to SPN ending. Jensen was the one that pushed to end SPN, and the plan was always to use Soldier Boy as a transitional part away from the iconic Dean role. Covid apparently pushed these plans back a bit. I gather Soldier Boy is going to be quite a change from the heroic Dean role.

You “heard” without including the source (url).   How many times do I have to tell you Anons to always include the source or else I’m going to think you’re just making up shit. That doesn’t line up with Kripke’s interview in the Entertainment Weekly article (credit): 

When it came time to cast Soldier Boy, Ackles wasn't on Kripke's initial radar for the part. "My assumption was, he's just finished his 15 years [on Supernatural]. I can't imagine he wants to dive into another project," Kripke says. "But, as luck would have it, he called me for a completely other issue. He wanted to pick my brain about a project."

During that conversation, Ackles asked his former boss about what he was working on. That's when the topic of casting Soldier Boy on The Boys came up, and Kripke sent Ackles the audition pages for consideration. "He texted me back in three minutes and said, 'I definitely want to do this!'" Kripke recalls. "Within a week he was booked, but it wouldn't have happened if he hadn't just randomly called. I hadn't talked to him in months."

It doesn’t like sound like “several years�� of talk between Jensen and Kripke “on a new show”, more like 6 months at best about a new role.  Jensen was originally scheduled to direct an episode of Walker, which would have been planned in early to mid 2020.  At best Jensen probablly called Kripke in July 2020, booked the job a week later, and announced his new role a month later in August.

“Kripke actually customized the Soldier Boy part for him prior to SPN ending.”

Technically that’s true.  Jensen confirmed on August 17 he is joining The Boy.  The last day of filming for SPN finale is September 10.  

“Jensen was the one that pushed to end SPN”

Is this the new fanlore by the AAs?  This wouldn’t be because I speculated on my little blog that Jared’s holding deal with CBStv studios was why SPN ended in season 15?

“Soldier Boy is going to be quite a change from the heroic Dean role.”

Kripke said Soldier Boy was Homelander before Homelander.  Either he means SB’s celebrity status and leadship of the pre-The Seven, or he was a villian who took perverse pleasure in killing people in the most most violent ways possible.  in other words, the demon Dean we were promised but never got.

[ephemeralgalaxies]

Loki Ep4 Spoilers (again)

TL;DR Mobius is a jealous loner desperate for a connection to heal his own broken self, but for all the crap he gives Loki about not being able to trust others and putting up walls, he's just as terrified of being known and then left behind.

Would just like to take note once again on Mobius refusing to listen to Loki, for once not being able to tell apart (on the surface) what are lies and what's the truth because Loki has done the impossible-- learned to love himself (kinda). For once, this is a part of Loki's life that Mobius doesn't get to witness, and it breaks him. He can't spend weeks analyzing each little tell, it's all right there in the moment. It's a different Loki than he's ever known. Before, in ep1, Mobius knew exactly what to say to get answers out of Loki-- he's studied this. But now? Now Loki is a regular, real person (in a sense... TVA is kinda weird in their "is this technically a part of reality") that went through another traumatic event without Mobius watching alongside. He's scared and doesn't trust himself. He's jumping to conclusions, he's pushing down all his typical questions, coming off harsher, less patience.

And then when he realizes that Loki has learned to care for/love Sylvie (in whatever way that is, this Loki has never truly loved anyone before-- always holding back in fear), it throws out everything he's ever known about Loki out the window. He is changing, not just into someone the TVA can use, but rather into a person of his own. And Mobius doesn't know how to process that immediately, instead resorting to trying to embarrass Loki about his "crush" on Sylvie, lashing out on idea of them forming a romantic relationship because Loki couldn't even form a proper friendship with him (in his mind, especially after Loki leaves the Supermarket with Sylvie in ep2).

He's getting jealous, defensive, angry. The only other time we've seen him remotely this "not-calm" was earlier in ep2 when Hunter B-15 instructs Loki to come with her instead. (my god, he really is just so jealous) (to be fair, though, his closest friend is a lying back-stabber who gives the order to prune him, so... not like this version of Mobius is really in the healthiest environment to begin with...)

And the fact that he just won't let go with that, freaking "I don't need you anymore... or as you might say, 'our interests are no longer aligned.'" Like, I'm sorry but that is a sure petty jab at Loki for choosing Sylvie and this "variant life" over staying and helping him at the TVA (as he's still refusing to believe that they are all variants like Loki/Sylvie say). Especially adding "Yeah, I guess you don't do partners. Unless, of course, it benefits you and you intend to betray them at some point," and "Why? Cause I lied about your 'girlfriend'?"

LIKE SIR. IM TRYING TO MAKE THIS A SERIOUS POST AND IM CRYING WHILE WATCHING BUT I JUST KEEP LAUGHING AT HIS RESPONSES BECAUSE THEY'RE KILLING ME JUST HOW HURT HE IS BECAUSE LOKI FINALLY LEARNED TO LOVE SOMEONE AND HE WASN'T A PART OF IT. BECAUSE LOKI LEFT HIM IN ORDER TO BE "HAPPY", THIS WHOLE JOURNEY FOR MOBIUS-- PROBABLLY HIS BIGGEST CASE --JUST BURNT OUT, ENDING LIKE THAT. ALL HOPES OF "SAVING THE BROKEN THINGS", THAT "SCARED LITTLE BOY SHIVERING IN THE COLD" GONE BECAUSE HE NEVER REALLY NEEDED MOBIUS. BECAUSE LOKI (EVEN SYLVIE) COULD BE HAPPY ON THEIR OWN. THEY DIDN'T NEED TO BE THE VILLAIN, TO CAUSE PAIN AND DESTRUCTION AND DEATH. THEY COULD MAKE THEIR OWN LIVES.

And if they could do that... then how good is the TVA, truly?

So instead, he has to twist this, find some way to be repulsed by Loki's development-- "this kind of sick, twisted romantic relationship" because how dare Mobius, even for a second, think that maybe there is more to this relationship between Loki and Sylvie than an "incredible seismic narcissist" only ever being able to fall in love with himself? To look in the reflection and see beauty-- not in the dagger and what it's bond, it's craft, it's story means, but rather in the image mirrored back through that love. The person loving, not the existence of love itself. That's why it stabs you in the back, that's why the metaphor failed, because at the time, Loki didn't understand real love, romantic, familial, platonic, or self. He cared for his mother, but he failed her-- he lost her. He always pushed her away enough to keep himself safe, never truly feeling it all. But with Sylvie? it's different. Sylvie understands him. Sylvie, in some ways, is him. Of course he has to learn to love her, to appreciate all she has accomplished despite her struggles. He has to love her so that he can understand that he, too, deserves love. If Sylvie, with the same childhood and parents as him, with trauma and blood on her hands like him, that same desperate attempt to be alone in order to save themselves from being abandoned... if he knows she is worthy of love and happiness, then why can't he be as well? Why does he always have to be alone?

And then when Mobius tells him that Sylvie's been pruned, it destroys him-- he's alone again. Because he can never return to his timeline, never have that Ragnarok bond with his brother, be a true Odinson, avenge his mother. Sylvie is dead-- the one person that could possibly love him because she was him and he's a narcissist (in his own words). Mobius no longer believes him, can no longer see through the lies, too blinded by his own rage and fear and pain. Loki, once again, has no one (the fact that you can pinpoint the exact moment he realizes all this too, ep4 23:06, while Mobius continues to brush his warnings aside and rant on Loki and Sylvie).

"Well, I'm gonna have to close this case now, 'cause I don't need you anymore."

And so, he takes one last jab at Mobius--

"Out of all the liars in this place, and there are a great many, you are the biggest."

M: "Why? 'Cause I lied about your girlfriend?" Because I told you she was dead, because you were terrified, because you don't know how to go on without her?

L: "Oh, no. That I can respect." Ofc you would, that's your job, get information out of me. Manipulate me into thinking I can trust you because you don't trust me enough to let me tell you on my own. Because everything I do is out of my own interest. Of course you would lie about that, so would I. "I mean the lies you tell yourself."

You refuse to believe me now, to think that I could care for you as well, that I am capable of more than loving myself or a version of me. That maybe, for once, I'm not just trying to look out for myself. That maybe knowing that you're trapped here after believing you actually had free will, to learn that no one in this universe-- this sick, twisted timeline --actually has free will. Please believe me, please let me help. I didn't give up on Sylvie, I won't give up on you if you just give me time.

Anyways, this episode absolutely destroyed me

[koszmarnybudyn]

Will I ever stop projecting my life experiances onto fictional charakters? Probablly not. Anyway, here are my neurodivergent dndads headcanons:

Jodie has adhd (it is canonical and very important to me), so does Glenn (he started self medicating with drugs pretty early on), and Nick (who also did the drugs things as Nick, but as Nickolas he got diagnosed and takes meds), and Taylor (look at this kid and tell me he doesn't)

Henry is autistic and adhd (this is mostly self projecting, but the "you should hide your true self and your emotions and imperfections from everyone" feels like masking to me) Lark and Sparrow also inheareted it, Mercedes also has both (she is weird and we should all accept it, and he and Henry understand each others struggles) , Normal is Autistic and adhd also ( like come on wearing one piece of clothing all the time? This is also just projecting)

Link is Autistic (I do make the rules, but he just is, look at me and try to tell me he is neurotypical, he likes trains and i cannot draw him without the raptor arms)

Idk if Scary has something, she is a difficult charakter for me to understand honestly, but just like queer people neurodivergent folks (at least in my experiance) somehow always find one another so she might be neurodivergent idk. Ron is autistic (because of course he is, look at him)

Hermie is autistic.

Wow dndads has canonicly eaten my brain. I have so many thoughts about them.

[amyltia]

Emma and her mirrors (Jane Austen)

Emma and her mirrors or vanity and doubles in Emma of Jane Austen

I recently read Emma and I loved it ! I probablly is basics in Emma studies but I was amazed by the number of doubles in it, all enlighnting the character of Emma herself and showing from the beginning of the novel how afraid (?) or at least far from love Emma tries to keep herself.

Harriet : Emma’s inferior and uninentional victim

In Emma you can’t live romance indirectly, or it backfires to you, that whas Emma first lesson. Through Harriet, Emma can display her interest in romance (that’s what matchmaking is about : living romances without actually living them, so it’s safier because she doesn’t need to live her own romances). She repeats that she won’t mary but this matchmaking actually shows that she does have a big interest in romance but doesn’t want to get too near this side of herself (until the end of the novel when she has to face it).

That’s why she feels so much guilt toward Harriet : she used her. When it doesn’t hurt Harriet it is ok but this game of Emma ends up hurting Harriet and it is Emma fault on many levels : she put ideas in her head but more than that she used Harriet as a shield, living romances through a window, only the window got hurt and it showed Emma how unfairly and selfishly she treated Harriet, her tho unintentional, victim however. The catharsis backfired and it hurts with guilt.

More than in romance, Emma makes Harriet and sees her as a double of herself : she educates her and make her feel and think like her. But Emma sees her as a inferioir double of herself : Harriet must set for someone she Emma wouldn’t care for, Mr Elton or Mr Churchill once she Emma is certain that she doesn’t love him - that’s why Harriet saying she loves Mr Knightley is such a shock for Emma, because he is on Emma’s level, not Harriet’s.

Jane Fairfax : Emma’s superior and rival as a heroine

She is Emma’s rival from infancy : compared from their childhood at Emma’s disadvantage in accomplishments. We then learn that Emma always considered Jane as a rival of her unconfessed love for Mr Knightley.

But she is more than that : she is her rival as a heroine. It’s Jane who has all the characteristics of a fairy tale heroine : she is beautiful, kind, talented but poor, her birth circumstances are complicated and she is an orphan (lost her parents and raised by a kind benefactor), just like Cinderella. Indeed, she ends up engaged to the rich and handsome prince (or beast if we go for the Beauty and the Beast pattern) that elevates her status and save her from misery. She is also the one whose love story is told (even secretly) during the most part of the novel, it is to her that most of the things happens directly (note : Emma has a very interesting statut : she chooses to remain a side-character of the romances around her but also by being at the crossroads of all of them and influencing them she is the main protagonist of the novel) ; the final revelation of the long last engagment is very novel-like. This Jane would be deserving and could compete for a fairy tale heroine role, much like Fanny Price’s in Mansflied Park.

Mrs Elton : the worse in Emma

Towards Mrs Elton, Emma feels nothing but disgust. She is an anti-role model for her and a warning of Emma’s own faults. Emma and Mrs Elton have one big point in common : they love to be first. Emma can’t stand Mrs Elton because they want the same thing (this is the scene when Mrs Weston tells Emma that she has to let Mrs Elton lead the dance, instead of Emma - to Emma’s disappointment) and Emma condemns in Mrs Elton what she would condemn in herself too if she saw it, that’s why Emma’s disgust in Mrs Elton is so ironic and funny. Her own pride is speaking because it makes them “rivals” but it also shows that Emma has enough judgment to condmen this fault, at least in others, and knowing her application in imporving herself it shows Emma in a good light too, while also allowing Jane Austen to condemn it indirectly in Emma herself.

Another one is that they love to have protegees : what Emma does with Harriet is not so different than what Mrs Elton does with Jane. They help them and care for them, but with or withtout realizing it, they use their little friend in a very selfish way : to make themselves feel like always the superior and powerful one, in other words because they like to be first. It’s not manipulation because they really do what they think best for their friends and tho a mistake it doesn’t erase the kindness in the act (at least on Emma side). Both Emma and Mrs Elton by insisting on controling Harriet and Jane are not helping at all and it is then all more funny and ironic to see Emma pity Jane who has to endure the constant “help” of Mrs Elton, while this is exactly what Emma herself does with Harriet.

Addendum - When Emma of Jane Austen meets french author La Bruyere and his Characters :

Chapter XII. OF OPINIONS

(72.) The same faults which are dull and unbearable in others are in their right place when we have them; they do not weigh us down, and are hardly felt. One man, speaking of another, draws a terrible likeness of him, and does not in the least imagine that at the same time he is painting himself.

If we could see the faults in other people, and could be brought to acknowledge that we possess the same faults, we would more readily amend them; it is when we are at a right distance from them, and when they appear what they really are, that we dislike them as much as they deserve.

From La Bruyere, The Characters, 1688 - quoted from this translation

Dear Emma is he talking about you ? Though completely unrelated of course, when I read this from La Bruyere I thought of Emma and Mrs Elton. Emma despises Mrs Elton but she doesn’t see that they have a lot in common, and the faults she easily sees in Mrs Elton, she doesn’t see them in herself. NB. I think this quote from La Bruyere could apply to many Jane Austen characters : if I remember Lizzie and Darcy at some point admit that they have some faults in common.

Frank Churchill : the exact double of Emma

He is her true double. They have the same character (open, warm, playful) and the same faults (inconsideration and a little selfishness, but they are aware of it and want to improve themselves) and the same fate (marrying people, I think Emma says it at the end, “better than themselves” and able to guide them in the right path). The two couples, Emma/Mr Knightley and Jane/Frank are exact double with Emma = Frank and Jane = Mr Knightley. (Note : Making Jane a double of Emma and also of Mr Knightley...that’s why even tho mirrors play no part in the novel I called this little essay Emma and her mirrors, because the reflection mecanism gets pretty interwined). Emma herself tells Frank about the “likeness” between them, so Jane Austen emphatizes this mirror relation between the two couples at the end of the novel.

Conclusion v.1

Why so many mirrors ? It’s a real question. We don’t see so many doubles in all the others Austen novels, so why does Jane Austen use so many diffferent mirrors to portray Emma ? It’s the first Jane Austen novel that has me wonder so much about it structure and writing.

I realize it may allow to condemn Emma without actually be condamning her but why ? Also it may be because she isn’t a very active character, she is very peaceful actually, so it allows Jane Austen to keep her out of troubles and make her a homie girl, while showing the contours/edges of her character by using more novel-like characters. Because it seems to me that while she speaks and think in a very novel-like way (she “fancies” a loot, like with the gypsies/Harriet/Frank) she is not the most novel-like character of Jane Austen : not much happens directly to her (it is arguable because some things do, like Mr Elton proposal, and Mr Knightey’s but during the whole Frank Churhill arc she is really a side-character in his secret and untold story - it’s like there is a hidden novel in the novel, and this configuration makes me wonder about Emma’s statut as a heroine). [to complete]

Please if I said something absolutely wrong do not hesitate to tell me

[deltapocalypse]

Quo:

Error: I mean unless you want the less practical and more chaotic version that would probably not happen

Error: Oh boy, buddy, friend i would totally draw one if i knew but i would have to learn how to draw robot arms or even prosthetics. I swear i will after finishing the deltapocalypse comic i’m making.

Quo: Maybe, they don’t know for sure yet though.

Error: We can’t be sure yet tho i drew a while ago survivor Noelle concept for funsies, I need to change it since she probablly shouldn’t wear shorts during the apocalypse... (not sl*tshaming it would just would make it an easier target for the zombies to bite)

+

Quo: 

:scary dramatic music that will lead to jump-scare:

Berdly: NOW YOU KNOW WHAT that is absolutely just not going to work here that dumb weird music is just meant to get a cheap scare off of all of us. I for one am not an idiot (unlike the rest of them) and wouldn't’ do something as stupid as to open a very obviously trapped door. You can even see blood coming out from under it! ugh, this zombie apocalypse shit just doesn’t seem to understand how much of an intellectual I am compared to it. If it wanted to trap me it could at the very least not have to rely on something as unlikely as me opening this door. What a rip off!

Quo: Depends. We’ll probably draw you a sad comic.

Error: oHBOY I GOT ONE IN THE MAKING, so many sad comics

Quo: They should find the backpacks in the school while looking for supplies. Here are some ideas:

Both of them would need to go home to get their own backpacks. Susie never had one and Kris was sick on the day the zombies went loose. They’d both be searching through the school and pick up some backpacks of other students there. Kris’s because I really want it to could be a reference to Jockey’s backpack. It’s hers but a lot more worn out so it has a less noticeably purple color. Susie gets a huge backpack that can hold a lot of things in a lot of different pockets because it’d be easier for her to carry.

Kris also gets Jockey’s pedometer

Pleasseeee

(Nobody who reads this comic knows who she is) In my opinion, even if it’s pink it’d be helpful for telling time and whatever else, and the backpack fits with Kris’s outfit and is useful. And it being pink and not fitting the rest of Kris’s color pallet fits with that they got it from somebody else and it isn’t theirs.

Quo: Yeah we are still planning on an explanation on that! It’s spoilers though but don't worry the questions will be answered.

Error: We had different ideas on how it happened, mine is kinda out of character with our Kris’ personality so it isn’t canon to the story, but both are basically in a way Kris’ fault.

Quo: They’re safe in the dark world. Unless they find a new portal they’re not going to be able to get involved.

Quo:

Quo: Yeah, that would be bad.

Error: So bad

Quo: That would be an interesting idea to toy with, but sadly in this version how the zombification thing works would still end up being able to infect humans. I don’t know how much DT would change it. If Kris was determined enough maybe they’d be able to get rid of it completely and not turn into a zombie.

Quo:

Quo: They ain’t picking that off the ground. If it’s infected it pry wouldn’t be a good idea to bring it with you.

Error: I’ve seen people draw cursed fanarts of susie slapping kris and making ok signs with it but i really doubt they would risk to take it. Also give it less than 5 hours and that thing gonna smell like hell.

[arreisstorm]

https://twitter.com/TIME/status/0?s=19

I am so incredibly proud of BTS!

They may have started out as just a K-pop band, but they have managed to push way beyond those boundaries and transition into Western culture without transforming themselves, their music, and what they stand for. BTS have become the first Korean act to completely sell out stadiums in the U.S. and have done 10x that throughout Asia! They have broken countless records in the music industry globally, and have had opportunities many could only dream of. One being when RM was chosen to speak at the General Assembly and delivered a speech so profound and emotional that it made us all cry and gain so much more love for Kim Namjoon. Now these 7 unbelievably talented, versatile boys have been honored in a beautifully written TIME article detailing every impossible feat they've accomplished. It probablly seems like they're living a never-ending dream to both BTS, and especially to the best leader ever, RM, when so many unfathomable things like this continue to happen. I mean, this group that was comprised of nothing but strangers and had constant member changes before actually debuting. Now look at what they have done. This is monumental! It's historical and with even more history yet to be told! Through years of being together, relying on each other through hardships and trying times, BTS have formed such a close-knit bond that could stand the end of times and I for one, have loved seeing them succeed through everything all while growing more as a family. I know I said it already, but I'm just so proud of BTS. 🙏💜

Oh and also Suga made another prediction:

"...but maybe we could perform at Super Bowl someday."

And you all know that Min Yoongi's predictions are never wrong, so guys, lets make it happen! Let's get them to the Super Bowl and show them how much ARMY and the world love them!

[tattooedgoldenretriever]

Hello! I tried to stay far far away from his personal life a long time ago, I didn’t search m’s name since her face creeps me out, but the last event made me think and there is something I need to understand. You said in one of your previous posts that she is a “vile woman who fetishises LGBT+ people”. And more. What did she do?

Hi anon, sorry for the late response. Yesterday, I was far too angry to articulate my thoughts well and my wifi was terrible. But I’ve calmed down now so I can respond.

She fetishes gay men a lot. She made a sign last year saying ‘I had gay sex on this sign’ and made D hold it. She’s also responded to one person to comment on C’s  ass since their handle was like ‘colfrsbutt’ and she wass like ‘Ooooh i love’s butt’. She has done a few other things I can’t remember right now but she rarely talks about LGBT people without making it sexual.

She also mocked C*ry M*nteith’s death which is why I strongly dislike her. Context for this tweet - CM was supposed to do a BTS interview with LM and C and D were going to do the same on the day CM died. Obviously, they had to reschedule. Then, when they finally recorded the interview with C&D, M posted this lovely tweet:

She has never apologised for this. IN fact, she only addressed it eight months later when someone who was a friend of Croy’s found out about it. He was made aware of it when he promoted her band and deleted the tweet he made about her band after learning what she said. After this, she went on a rage, blaming everyone who was angry and completely deflected the blame. It’s clear, she only addressed it because her promo was taken away. If she really felt bad, she would’ve addressed it when it happened and clarified what she meant. It’s not the first time she’s made fun of people with drug addictions though.

She said thsis when someone had been told by many of her fans to kill herself because she wasn’t a fan of M:

This one is minor and maybe not proof of anything but she was also consdecnding towards C. She was supposed to interview ohim on the red carpet and she bragged about it. He didn’t show up and she tweeted thsi:

(Also. This is speculation so no one come for me - but allegedly she assaulted D after this. She was on a rage, D defended C so she attacked him. THe next day this rumour was released, D showed up with a huge bruise on his face from ‘gum surgery’. I trust the source that told us this but like I said I do notknow if this is true and it’s speculation)

This is also a minor one, and one I thought was a joke at first. But conisdering her leaked post from instragram demanding presents, I think she’s just like this and it just isn’t something that’s apealing to me

Like I said, She might be joking. I’ll admit I would do jokes like that. (Especiallly since I have an uncommon name) but with her latest insta post that was leaked, I don’t think she was joking that much. 

This tweet here bugs me, mostly since it raises issues with why people are against feminism

I do understand why people are criticl of feminsm. It is sadly filled with a lot of people who use it to shame people who aren’t ‘perfec’t and people who are just as sexist as the ones they claim to be against. And there’s SWERFs and TERFs (I should also point out, M has made a lot of TERF like comments that annoingly I can’t find but she’s made comments that have came across as only women have vaginas and onl men have penis). But comments like this... miss the point on misogyny. Men who hate women don’t hate them because ‘lel you can’t give them orgasm’s. It’s usuall a deeper reason than that. It also kind of ignores the fact htat there are gay men who are misogynists so this tweet just reeks of her wanting to cash in on activism to show how ood she is, while not really doing anything (since last years women’s march, I don’t remember her doing anything for feminsm and the fact she just follows D around and only lets herself be seen as hi GF raises a few eyebrows for me. I believe she’s a feminism of convenience rather than actually being one).

She has also insulted D a lot of times - most notable calling him a ‘D-bag’ during HATAI, is often quite rough with him (it’s even been bragged by friends and fans that she’s violen’t with him) and often uses him for photo ops. There’s at least two videos of her plastering a fake smile on her fce when she notices cameras and tries to make them more coupley. 

I’ve probablly missed out a lot since I’ve been following this shit for six or seven yeras now but I hope this clears things up! I just want o say this is why i’m angry at the engement. I wouldn’t care if it was anyone else but it’s mostly due to it being her and because of the qu**rbaiting D has participated in over the years

[914x13]

long ass personal rant, go ahead and ignore this 

fuck paragraphs and stuff, right? run-ons and no transitions or spacing is nice

Don’t exactly wanna die but definitely don’t wanna be alive, why isn’t “cease to exist” an option? I’ve literally never felt this... dead inside? I don’t want to do anything, I’m extremely exhausted yet I can’t sleep. I have so much that I need to do but I can barely get out of bed to go to the bathroom let alone do something productive. I don’t know what my purpose in life is -- I’m terrible at literally everything. I can’t even walk right because of the stupid fucking disorder I got when I was younger. Yesterday the side effects were so bad I thought I was relapsing, which is even rarer than getting it in the first place; if I do ever relapse, I doubt I’ll recover again. I say I just want to fall in love but I’m a fucking wreck and push away everyone who ever even seems to show mild romantic interest in me because the thought of someone so much as holding my hand terrifies me. Telling someone all of my deepest thoughts/fears? Being intimate? Sharing a life with someone? That’s some scary shit right there. Plus my standards are ridiculously high given how worthless I am, like... I have zero business having standards. Also, I am legitimately in love with a celebrity, which is the most delusional-ass thing ever, and I hate myself even more for it because it’s not like I’m a 13 year old, I’m 18 and it’s just pathetic. All of my friends have been in relationships, many of them even in lasting ones.They always make jokes about like, “Oh, I’ll find you a boyfriend!” “You’re probablly gonna be the last one in our friend group to lose their virginity lol” which I don’t really mind becauuse they’re my friends and I love them but like... it’s true, and it sucks. Also I’m too chicken shit to come out to literally anyone, even my one friend who has on numerous occasions asked me things like, “What would you do if a girl hit on you?” and I always want to just fucking say “Okay, I’m pan” but thats too terrifying and also idk if she even knows what pansexual is or how she feels about the whole numerous genders thing and just...yeah. Also I suck at talking to people and all of my friends moved away for college besides a- the one (who I always wanna come out to) bc she goes to the same college as me and b- the one who used to go ehre tooo but was killed in a car accident two days before move in day. so I basically have no friends anymore because I fucking suck at talking to people plus obviously I was super out of it for the first month or so, Besdies this one guy in my drawing class who always fucking talks to me and possibly likes me based off his comments/actions but ngl I wish he’d leave me alone because he’s 23 and I’m just not interested in general.Also complete swerve of topic but I can’t stand my stupid accent. I don’t talk like anyone here/where I grew up and possibly its related to the fact that I had to do speech therapy when I was litle? but anyways yeah people always have trouble understanding me and it makes me want to go die in a hole because it’s humiliating to be having a conversation or w/e and suddenly having to repeat myself numerous times or even spell out what I’m saying. Literally never wanna talk again (also, my voice itself is gross). Also I think I’ve gained a few pounds recently but even if I do somehow try to lose it again I’m scared I’ll just end up losing weight off of my already nonexistent butt/boobs. My arms are so gross and flabby, my thighs are huge but not in a nice way, my calves are getting big, and my tummy has a little bulge. I don’t have a scale here but I think I’m easily 125-130 lbs now. If I had to get fat, why couldn’t it be in desirable places? My face is stupid too, especially the shape of it. I kind of have a double chin, and my cheekbone area is super asymmetrical. My eyes are small and my nose is big and has a weird sort of shape to it. My skin/scalp is super dry, my hair is always frizzy. My hips, oh god. I have hip dips/violin hips. It is the most unnattractive thing, I can’t wear so many things without looking stpid because my hips are just nonexistent. Literally, my body shape is a rectangle. I have gross huge shoulders too, I look so huge and awkward bc of it. My hands... something abut them is just weird. I think maybe they’re really wide. They look huge. Anyways there’s probably 10000 other things I could whine about but I’m feeling even more ~disconnected~ from the world now so I gotta blast

ps Reflection is the ultimate depression jam and also quite possibly having it on repeat is the only thing keeping me grounded right now which i guess is a good thing