#and like its not that big of a deal bc if i Make it a big deal ill put too many expectations on it. which i mean im already doing but. 😐
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When the only person who might understand what happened- understand. Not sympathize or empathize or comfort you but understand what happened, isn't there anymore. Or: 'A Man Made Me Do Something I Didn't Want To', for when you can't talk about it or look it in the eye [Patreon | Commissions]
#Tuvok#Kes#comix#idk how to tag this bc of the allusion#st voy#star trek voyager#bea art tag#comix page#star trek#this is not a one to one allegory nor is it meant to be - I am specifically focusing in on the loss of bodily autonomy that occurs when#Kes and Tuvok have their bodies taken over purposefully by men for various reasons which all boil to power. 'Because I could' and Because#they thought Kes or Tuvok wouldn't be able to stop them from doing so. Because they thought they had the power to do so so why wouldn't#they? But again this is not one to one - I interpret and will continue to interpret these instances in many different ways#But something that sticks with me in canon is how 'impervious' Tuvok is made - There is that scene at the end of Warlord which#shows that Kes is affected by what just happened to her - she's confused and hurt and doesn't know what to DO now that the in-the-moment#fight is over and it's time to just keep living and Tuvok comforts her but when he will go on to be taken over again and again and again#there will be no one to comfort him - no one HE can go to - and the narrative doesn't say that there should be. Even when he's#taken over by the BORG (an experience which had a lasting traumatic impact on characters like Seven or Picard - granted they were connected#for a lot longer) this is only mentioned offhandedly. One wonders why it occured at all. There's also how the other two main Vulcans#T'Pol and Spock - when they are forced to act emotionally or are in situations that affect their emotional equilibrium there is a big deal#made about it and they are hurt and ashamed and given some degree of care and comfort by those around them but when Tuvok#is forced into similar situations it is simply assumed he'll get over it - not even just by the other characters but the narrative itself#takes it for granted Ex: 'Workforce' where he forgets ALL his Vulcan training or 'Meld' where Suder's influence#unintentionally makes him lose it and try to kill him...THOUGH I think Suder hugging an unconscious Tuvok is perhaps the closest we get to#someone comforting Tuvok after he's been through that sort of ordeal. I'm not saying Tuvok would WANT others to be hugging him#and offering him emotional comfort etc (he's Vulcan) but I find it interesting that the narrative assumes that the black body (even alien)#is more 'durable' than its white counterparts. 'Stronger'. Assumes that there is no interiority which recoils and sustains the damage#when hurt. That there is nothing worth exploring because there is no impact from the impact. A crater lands and the Soil beneath it is#untouched
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#sars cov 2#covid 19#i've interacted with 4 different friends/acquaintances in the past month alone who have all been hospitalised after having a stroke#(and in one case multiple strokes)#one who i visited in hospital over the weekend had a (unmasked) nurse coughing up a lung in her room 👍#and one of them who had to undergo surgery also had to be moved to a different hospital#bc the ward they were keeping him in was full of confirmed covid patients 👍👍#idk how many times it needs to be said before it gets through people's heads but VACCINES ARE NOT ENOUGH#and encouraging ppl to rely solely on them when there are already plans to jack up the prices so you have to KEEP PAYING for boosters#for an ONGOING mass-disabling event is so laughably unrealistic and absurd and flat-out demonic#you need to mitigate the actual spread of covid by WEARING A MASK + fighting for CLEAN AIR/proper ventilation in public spaces!!!!!!#ppl are so eager to forget the whole 'break the chain of transmission' thing and how effective masking is and so this is where we're at#'i got infected and infected other ppl who might die or become permanently disabled but it's no big deal bc no one else wears a mask#so if /i/ didn't infect them someone else would have anyway so it's not my fault and really its got nothing to do with me and my choices'#if everyone is responsible then no one is responsible - that's how it works right?#it's no wonder some ppl go rabid at even the sight of someone wearing a mask and minding their own business#ppl seeking treatment for unrelated conditions/illnesses and then dying from covid caught in hospitals#due to lack of npis/basic mitigation measures - no regulations no accountability#we truly live in a hell (''new normal'') of our own making#anyway none of this is new news at all i mostly thought it might be good to share the info graphic abt signs of stroke#covid has been given free reign and chances are increasing as to how likely you'll encounter it happening to someone you know at some point#also heart attacks and pots and alzheimer's etc etc etc
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People who really like shuake also seem to write themselves into a corner wrt Akechi and his relationship to Akiras team. Contrary to popular belief, the team, including Haru, does not hate Akechi. At worst, they tolerate him and deal with his attitude. Hes a good teammate and respectable fighter and the team recognizes that at the end of the day, he was a teenager who was manipulated and abused by a man who saw him as disposable. Just about every thief understands this intimately. They have the same mindset wrt adults who take advantage of the people beneath them. Under different circumstances they wouldve been friends. And if u approach it from that angle, it becomes less about Akechi being the sole person who ‘gets’ Akira, and more about the thieves being the only people in the world who ‘get’ Akechi.
When you expand your thoughts to include the thieves as members of his Team and not roadblocks that get in the way of your ideal shipping dynamic, you allow urself to give Akechi and Akira more depth and nuance to their own relationship.
Akira and Akechi are wildcards; both of them struggle with the face they choose to display to the world. Its the first time Akira interacts with someone who is, at a literal, technical level, his ‘equal’. But Akechi is one of many firsts for Akira yeah? Every thief has their bond with Akira thats completely unique and personal. Akechi will never be the person who witnesses Akiras Awakening, hes never the person who watches Akira have his restless nights alone in the attic, and hes never the person who realizes in real time that the teenager hes housing is just Some Kid, not the delinquent hes been warned about. Hes not Ann or Yusuke, or any of the thieves; he doesnt have the time or experience that they have with Akira, and I think its interesting to explore that part of their relationship, shippy or not.
Akechi is someone who is incredibly lonely and self depreciating despite his cockiness and attitude. He has no positive bonds to speak of save for his connection with Sae. To have him see a team that works together and cares for each other, how do you think he would feel? Out of place? Inferior in some way? Angry about how hes been alone for so long in this single minded quest for revenge? Wouldnt that be a point of struggle between the two of them? I think what makes shuake good for me is knowing that Akechi needs alot of time to heal, and the thieves would want to help with that process. They do it bc they care, bc Akira cares, and bc they trust Akiras opinion (and he trusts theirs in return); if Akira feels like Akechi is someone who can be trusted Now after everything thats happened, then the thieves would do their best to help. And how would Akechi feel about that? Angry about the show of pity? That even now, he has no real say in what happens to him? Or begrudgingly grateful that they are cordial with him? Because they do care, he KNOWS they care, they care TOO MUCH actually; but the one thing he values over brawn and wits is honesty- fighting for what you believe in without having to use soft words to justify it.
#chattin#also like. as an aside#my hcs regarding these two is like. they could not date. theyd kill each other lmao#and like TOTALLY by all means i am obsessed w unhealthy dynamics for shipping#let ur boys be toxic. let them be messy and loud and violent. its like crack to me#but just like fandom as a whole; fanon interpretations are prevalent and LOUD#and so trying to interact with it is like pulling teeth#personally. i think too many of them think of Akechi as like. the Rude one of the bunch#when i like to think of Akira as rude and full of himself when its deserved#and man. being able to outwit Akechi makes it Fully deserved#and i like to think Akira would remind him of this when he tries to intimidate or degrade his team#like. i have a short wip i never finished (basic sketches)#of Akira pulling him aside and grilling him#‘youre here because I Want you here. youre here bc i Allow you to be here’#‘if youre going to stoop low and play petty i can do the same. if theres anyone on my team whos a fucking idiot; its you.’#‘dont make me reconsider having you on the team.’#and akechis like okay great does ur dick feel big trying to pull rank on me?#but really hes fuming. hes MAD. like feral dog mad. bc akira is RIGHT. like he is most times as akechi starts to see.#he has enough of a mind to recognize that hes lashing out bc of his own shortcomings; even if he refuses to admit it out loud#its beyond infuriating. its degrading. its a little 😶.#never had to deal w anyone that rivaled his own brawn and wits. and now theres a TEAM of them#just humbling him time and time again. it sucks. he stays bc he cant help himself 😭#he needs to see more…#also#shuake#for blacklisting
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Reading physical copies of The Queen's Thief series for the first time and realizing that the maps in them are inconsistent???
#the only map i'd really seen before was K's map to P in Thick as Thieves#but now looking at the map from the last story of Moira's Pen I'm like. wait. the empire is opposite in this one.#like according to K's map C and K generally move west in TaT but the other map has them moving east#it's not that big a deal to me bc i had to read the entire series twice to conceptualize where anything was#(bc i spent the whole of The Thief not realizing just how important every nation mentioned was. good move mwt you genuinely fooled me.)#but now that i thought i had it down i am once again thrown off#also the map that's referenced in Moira's Pen shows up in the physical copy of TaT?#the beauty of this series is that I NEVER would have guessed what was up in that story even had i seen the map beforehand#anyway all i wanted was to conceptualize where Roa was & now i'm like spiraling. like is K's map incorrect bc its from an imperial lens#which honestly? yeah absolutely (it makes the peninsula look so small) but also how would the mede empire have#conquered so much land with inaccurate resources even if it is for propaganda's sake#nothing in this series is accidental so i'm like *pepe silvia meme*#anyway this is just me trying to put my thoughts somewhere ignore me my tags are a mess#The Queen's Thief#The Queen's Thief spoilers#like not exactly but since everything is spoilers i'm tagging that just in case#Thick as Thieves#Moira's Pen
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What a brilliant idea for the 100th episode. Give that bisexual a man to kiss
#bucktommy#911 abc#evan buckley#tommy kinard#like. they tend to make a big deal out of the 100th episode bc its a good place to jump the shark#but they really amped it up to 11 when they let us have bi buck#i cannot thank them enough#personal
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HAVNT ANIMATED IN A HHHOOOOTT MINUTE AND I WANNA GET BACK INTO IT. this here is super scuffed n cheap but it EXISTS NONETHELESS and i like it and wanna share. i love making these silly lil guys move.. jrwi is such a cartoon in my beautiful brain and mind
#jrwi fanart#jrwi show#jrwi riptide#jrwi riptide spoilers#HEHEHWEEEEE I LOVE THE GILLION NIGHTMARE ARC...im also doodlin up a lil animation where he stabs himself#THIS IS ALL PRACTICE THOUGH. IM STILL WORKIN ON THAT FUUUUCKING LORD OF LIGHTNING ANIMATION I STARTED LITERLY YEARS AGO#SLOWLY BUT SURELY THAT BITCH IS GONNA BE DONE#AND IM GONNA PUT IT TO MUSIC!!! IVE NEVER PUT A WHOLE ANIMATION TO SOUND BEFORE#NEVER FIGURED OUT THAT AUDIO HOO HAA#in the meantime though im PLAYING im having FUN HERE!!! i love animating.... i love animatin so much....#OH AULSO AAUUUUGHGH FUCKINNNG#the one n only condi condifiction liked it on twitter... THATS SOOOO COOOL IT BLOWS MY LIL MIND WHEN ARTISTS I LOOK UP TO GAZE UPON ME#i dont like to make a big deal out of it where everyone can see bc. yknow. we're all artists here. we're all justa buncha guys here#it feels weird to point out someone like that like HAIII HAIII I SAW U LIKED MY THINGGGG#its not weird when other ppl do it though like thats fine. but ME doing it. well. inconceivable.#but this is MY TAGS my secret little scrolls i bury beneath my art#and booyyy im KICKIN MY LITTLE LEEGGS SQUEALING AND GIGGLING AND SUCH HEHEHE WEEEEEEE!!!
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silly doodle for my fursona since i made her 11 years ago today :-)
#my art#YAAAAY KADEN BIRTHDAY#featuring her new design bc i keep forgetting to update her ref#ive been a furry for 11 years. isnt that something LMAO#im on fall break now!!! doing a lot of recharging bc the few days before break have been making me wanna eat my keyboard#< nothing crazy bad going on its just the work im doing being super annoying + dealing with a weird bout of imposter syndrome#BUT ANYWAY!!! happy birthday kaden. kissing his big head#i have a couple of things i wanna do for my next tattoo/its just a matter of committing but i Do want to get a cat#< I DO WANNA NOTE kaden and i have dif birthdays :-) mine was at the end of october hehe#but i do draw kaden on my birthday bc he is me but he is also Not Me . but he is. yk LOL#tattoo somewhere to honor kaden. just a standard shorthair/nothing that necessarily reads that im a furry#or the cat having her design bc it changes every now and then bahaha#AND LIKE IM VERY CERTAIN I WANT A CAT TATTOO FOR KADE LOL shes been a staple of my life for Eleven Whole Years#and shes helped me accept parts of myself. bc if i gave her the traits i had/have and i still loved her. then i could love me too#and that has drastically helped with So Much and my therapist says thats actually#a great therapy tool. forget the exact wording but the idea is there#everyone make a fursona now. ur homework is making a fursona and loving them. and then loving urself
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Zoro and Sanji are either oblivious of their feelings or married in secret impulsively with no in between in my brain. The fact that Luffy can officiate legally binding weddings due to being a pirate captain has made that my intrusive thought.
#One Piece#Eos Headcannons#Zosan#Sanji#roronoa zoro#like i give them a week in between time where they confess feelings and when they get married#they're idiots your honor#With eachother they are impulsive as hell though so like#they've got a friend who can officiate weddings that they trust so why not#after the initial wedding though Sanji will make a big deal about not having a ceremony BC he's a romantic at heart#but they can have a huge ceremony when they renew their vows its fine#I'm writing this when I'm supposed to be sleeping for my shift in the morning#Queue
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so with echoes of wisdom .. i havent watched any of the trailers beyond the very first one and the thumbnails/screenshots and what others have said about it-
but with the world inside the rift being called "Welt des Nichts" aka "world of nothing/void" in german ('still' in english, for some reason) and demises title in french being "avatar of nothing" ... yeah my anxiety is shooting through the roof again
(hopefully you can be a little more forgiving for me being anxious/weird about it bc demise is my blorbo)
i had similar worries with totk, that werent proven true thankfully, but the darn book is making it all worse again with all those weird lore things the game doesnt even so much as hint at AND potential retcons- im in for a really rough time huh, not just stress in real life (more in tags.. its alot) but now about my specific hyperfixation from two things even (AND artblock still..)
weird as it may sound, i dont want demise to get more lore, partly bc i dont believe theyd do anything with him that i would like (given their track record) but much more importantly- the fact that he has this little lore about him is precisely one of the reasons why i fell in love with him, i tend to like characters that are neglected by the narrative, and his story being both so flat and already done meant i can be very creative with what i come up with for him without necessarily contradicting anything in canon (which is ... or was a big point of how i wrote destiny's story and lore, working with canon in a way that reframes it all without straight up ignoring it ... but i suppose i urgently need to let go of that and accept i spend alot of time working things that will go to waste :( ) AND not having to worry that there will be more stuff with him that would massively change not only what im writing but also potentially how i feel about him since the game he was briefly in was the oldest chronologically and ended with his death- i didnt expect them to mess with anything that far back and thought theyd just go forward and leave the timeline behind and wouldnt mess with it again, given how botw seemed to be a sort of 'fresh start' that seemingly regarded the past as the past that needs to rest and that the timeline was finally no longer a discussion if everythings unified through botw and one thing going forward
but i suppose i was very wrong with that .__.
right now the only thing that motivates me still is the left over determination and spite to work on my zelda comic, since i have never gotten this far and really want to get something done for once, but i cant lie that im feeling like i should pause all work on it too to wait and see waht the book and the new game will do .. either to determine if i still have the will to keep working on it after those things are out (my love for tloz has been taking alot of hits lately ..) or if i have to change stuff (mostly bc of my lore problem trying to not ignore it ..)
#ganondoodles talks#zelda#ganondoodles rants#sorta#suicide attempt mention in the IRL stuff im talking about in the following tags btw#theres some construction stuff on our house going on#and my father is extremely stressed about it#he used to be very explosive- being silent and then exploding out of nowhere .. probably left me with lasting damage yippie-#but now he much more lets it eat at himself bc hes old and feels bad for the past stuff so now it makes him irritated and depressed#my older brother is the most normal cis straight guy you can imagine and incredibly impatient and bossy (you CANNOT talk with him)#(brother doesnt live in our house)#and while hes helping out hes doing it exactly how my father doesnt like and since you cant talk to the guy (explosive +200) it stresses hi#to the point of my father yesterday saying that “it would have been better if i had just died back in the day”#likely referring to the time when he was drafted for the military against his will and tried to kill himself#which i learned only like .. a year ago- theres so little my parents tell me ....#its like my mother telling me- while my father was in hospital for heart surgery- that she not only almost died back when i was a young tee#and only survived bc of some incredibly unebelievable lucky coincidences (medics on a travel being there that knew what she had-#-while our local doctors said welp- nothing we can do lady AND them beign there with a helicopter and emergency transferring her#to antoher bigger hospital while giving her immediate treatment our local one didnt do- AND at the big one just so happened to have-#-an expert on that illness in the facility when she arrived who was able to narrrowly save her life#BUT ALSO while she was recovering and weak and frail as a dust bunny witnessing someone stealing hospital surplies-#not noticing she was in the room at first (which .. the nurses left her in the nurse room while going on break ... which uhm .. yeah cool)#and if my mother hadnt acted in time like she was fully asleep and the lady stealing stuff beign in hurry- she might have killed her#without my mother being able to fight back bc she could barely even talk (the nurses didnt want to believe her when they got back either)#ANYWAY that comment from my father brough me to tears#and my mom is trying out more ... other medication shes not prescribed in hopes of it helping agaisnt her many pains#but i worry it will interact with the other stuff shes on ...#and i worry so much about both of their mental and physical well being#always trying to be the one to calm them down or help with communication bc that is a big problem in this houesehold#but i myself am also a very much not normal and not medicated shut in who has trouble dealing even with my own feelings
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I'm ngl, I think the fine is worse to me than forced community service. Ik they're all rich as fuck but. 10,000 euro for accidentally swearing? 10k!?!?!?!?!?! It's just a word??????? Just a little fuck???? I cannot believe the stewards are dying on this stupid fucking hill, oh my god. The world's most elite sport swear jar
Can't even say fuck anymore, because of woke.
#thinking abt how back in my fav ers of f1#theyd try not to curse obviously bcs i mean its polite or whatever#but. seriously not a big deal if so#just say oops! and move on#bcs i really really do not understand who it affects#theyre in a room of adults. who is this fucking bothered???#its not like them saying it in some big event everyones gonna see#ik this sounds like im being overly dramatic#i just cannot stand this sanitization its really absurd to me#i think its fine if theyre like. please try not to curse thank you#okay!! totally!!! this is a professional environment i understand that#but 10k and a threat of 5k just for one accidental little fucking?#ITS SO UNBELIEVABLY DUMB#but yeah the community service also fucking stupid#but its also just forcing the individual to repent so whatever#theyre privileged as hell go scrub the track w a toothbrush or whatever it is they make you do#but 10k ....stupid#absurd amount of money for saying a word that literally harms no one#catie.rambling.txt#f1
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You ever see something that is meant to be like...an overgeneralized statement for the sake of entertainment or comedy and not at all serious but it's about YOUR special interest and you are just sitting there trying not to explode with an entire explanation of why it's such an overgeneralized statement and the depth of the topic
#spitblaze says things#like. im not about to shame anyone about this. i WANT more people to be interested in video games as a storytelling medium#and calling someone a fucking casual about it Does Not Help#but it IS still a big big overgeneralization to say that all games in the 80s were simple arcade style deals#adventure games came into being in the 80s! maniac mansion and kings quest and snatcher! all 80s titles!#if we wanna go back even further the first Ultima game was 1979! as soon as we had the technology to make more narrative and complex games#we DID#obviously we see more of that now because its the easiest its ever been to make video games and put infinite thought and resources into#worldbuilding and narrative#and YEAH most 70s and 80s games were simple bc uh. our computers werent that good yet lol#but like. oh my god dragon quest and final fantasy 1 came out a year apart in thr 80#do not tell me it was all run jump get the coin lol
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hi, i unfortunately need help covering a combined bill that rounds to roughly ~$1500 due to the vehicle i share with my mother + my only transportation to work being suddenly very out of commission.
$500 is renting the cheapest vehicle we could for a week, the rest is for the part we need to repair it and the repair itself. the issues with it have already cost me hours at work.
i work 'full time' (a little under 40hrs) making minimum wage to support myself + my mom and our animals and we'd been coasting by despite having a $600 vet bill we were chipping away at. right now im prioritizing trying to get this $1500 off our backs.
if youre able anything helps, truly, even just reblogging this. thank you so much in advance (pls dont tag with b00st/etc)
♡ v3nmo: @/rookwind
♡ p@/pal: @/ceeqyinn
#dont have the other app but id make an account . wont tag this bc im staring at how tumblr deletes these posts and bans people lmfao#anyways if you want like. any other info lmk i didnt want to write a novel on the post#please and thank you truly i am so sorry to ask.. ik its not a big deal and community and mutaid is support nd not smn to feel bad about!!#but im just like. at the end of my rope rn#dunno why im posting at 3am 🫶 guess ill rb it later
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people who do STEM or administration as a career full time and continue to do art as a hobby, I am scared of you but like in a hot way. youre like if we were allowed to have cold drinks in winter. i look at you and think of miles morales with his two cakes. do you want to make out sometime
#i say all of this positively bc i just! i cant help admiring it!! even if its mundane or not a big deal to you i seriously cant wrap my head#around it.. this is in no way at all meant to be condescending or anything. whenever i look at someones bio and theyre like oh im working#as a lab assistant biologist pharmacist realtor etc im like woag.... thats insane.. and then i peep your art tag and it knocks my socks of#how?? what lives do you lead??? im so curious. i seriously want a peek inside your brains someday. or at least shadow you at work lol#i cant help but feel sad when someone says smth like well i have to support myself and art cant do that for me. or maybe you were#pushed into pursuing a 'safe' career bc i hear it a lot. all of my relatives have the same story working as nurses and OFWs for the family#i think for me its not about missed potential but rather its being sad about making a decision to put your happiness aside to get by#ive tried so hard to do it but it didnt work out. i guess watching you guys do it is fascinating to me#or maybe youve made peace with your decision or actually like what you pursued but im still amazed!! it makes me wonder what made#you pick one over the other in that case.. is it like putting time for two different things the way you would for a schedule?? hmmm#im doing graphic design so i dont really interact with ppl in other faculties even humanities like sociology or childcare... so i cant help#wondering what it must be like as someone whos pursuing visual communication both as an interest and career#i seriously wish i could do smth like a desk job or even admin and maybe ill try that if this doesnt work. or i could look into trades#but dyscalculia already makes it hard to do things like cash and mental math so i get overwhelmed if i think about this too hard#yapping
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what are u guys' dream game after sotm? since itll be the last game centered around the mimics backstory and integration and stuff (hopefully) theres basically a whole world of possibilities for currently neglected storylines lol
#my personal hope rn is a game including ggy and then the as dawko calls it 'security breach 2'#when i say including ggy i dont necessarily mean about like i rlly want vanny to be included if they do a game like that#but i also dont want a sotm esque ggy game where its copy and paste from the book#not only is that boring asf but i dont want the book as it is to be touched#the whole reason ggy is as good as it is is bc the author knows books and wrote it with a book in mind#not just to write something about fnaf#its formatted to be a good story in novel form not in game form#and it should be left alone#ily tony but u dont rlly need to be in the games#basically a ggy prequel including vanny heavily showing rabs design voice and dynamic with vanny#and how he got killed/gregory got freed#basically fleshing out the pre sb pizzaplex rab and vanny and glitchtrap era#and then the big campaign game like sb theyll probably do eventually about vanny cassie with gregory vanessa and freddy#id love if there was a reference to tony in the games like gregory mentions friends he used ti know#or ita just the basic idea of grappling with killing one of ur friends unwillingly and we connect the dots as bim talking abkut tiny#yknow#pandas.txt#pre sotm#thoughts#pre ggy game#ggy has to be made relevant soon bc of all those hints scott has been putting eveyrwhere#of mentioning ggy by name#that stuff is a huge deal he doesnt play around with secrets like how hes been treating those ggy hints#im so excited#i just hope it turns out good bc im so particular about ggy i dont want them to try and do the book but lame😭#any ggy content is a win but still theres a chance they could mess it up#like theyre doing with mimic#making a game completely centered around 2yo books that everyone already knows everything about already & its#in john fuhnaffs words 'copy and pasted'#like hello thats boring and lame
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can someone nice (!!) please please please adopt me im begging you im requesting you (huge word vomit and vent in tags, pls dont read if u dont want to!! and if you don't want this stuff on this blog PLS lmk!! i dont wanna make anyone uncomfy! )
#tw vent#yes ik i have a vent blog#but idk why i dont wanna go there#ill prolly delete this in a while + if i vent here (which ill try not to) ill always tag it#but if any of yall aren't fine with it pls do lmk!!! ill stop <3#Anyways.#fucking hell i hate this.#dude#i very specifically told them to hurry the fuck up THEY were the ones making us late#i have told them a hundred times the minimum time i jeed to get ready#i told them this morning too that you guys make us late then put it all on me#nad she went like oh no dear dont worry that wont happen#WELL GUESS WHAT BITCH#and like the lecture and huge ass scolding and then cold shouldet ive been getting from BOTH of them before i left for coachinh#im just tired atp#idk its not even that big a deal this happens everyday#i dont know how to feel#idk if im even rly feeling anything atp#its just that i really fucking hate being here#I wanna get the fuck out#but thing is this makes me feel kinda guilty occasionally#for eg a few days ago i was rly sick and she took care of me kinda#and then that made me feel bad for hating her#but then things like this happen and i cant help it and i feel so conflicted#i dont want to stay here i know that for sure but i feel guilty for it#if i speak im being rude and backtalking#if i dont speak im being rude and ignoring#the fuck am i supposed to do????#she always tells me to 'stay silent and just hear it'#and when i do that she keeps shouting again and again and finally i say smth bc although its extremely fucking dumb of me to open my mouth
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Unrelated to the art: I added a song on YT to a playlist I have for OSTs and I've listened to it like two times in full and as i was waiting on it to load to listen to while I colored I saw it had...... 5 views. Total. FIVE VIEWS. And this is the third time I've had it open. WELP. Thank you to the one person who recently uploaded a game from the Wii's OST.
Related to the art: I still love Sharena.
#fe heroes#sharena#she deserves art always but esp when i just need a ray of sunshine#im getting really mad about petty things when i post art here and share on discord#so i just..... hope i can go a week in the future drawing people i like without getting tags that bother me#like i know its nothing serious and no one is actively trying to be mean but i have a peeve and people keep activating it#and the last time i even mentioned it i got a call out post basically so im trying to keep it to myself#and not make a big deal about it bc it really isnt a big deal#but its incredibly demotivating and getting to the point ive thought that blocking people would be nice#and literally no one has done the thing to be mean ! so i feel bad blocking anyone so i havent blocked anyone#anyway have sharena while i slink off tumblr to agonize
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