#and like im not the kind of person who tends to say its everyones fault but mine

[geekwiththeglasses]

The fact that it's been almost two months since my car was stolen and despite being found by police I still don't have it back because everyone else keeps fucking me over.

[gentlebeardsbarngrill]

I'm so glad you're normal about Taika/Rita because so many people haven't been. And unfortunately, a big chunk comes from people just not respecting Rita.

I'm not saying she's perfect, she's made some mistakes, she's human. But people have looked down on her for years, mostly for vey flimsy reasons like 'tries too hard'. I even found an article from 2014 that basically called her the 'punching bag of the music industry'. Even when she wasn't really on my radar, people on Twitter and Reddit kept saying shit like 'never seen a Rita Ora fan, how is she successful', even though its understandable to anyone with an actual brain who thinks about it for a minute.

I remember when it came out she and Taika were together, people were just so rude about her (this was a bit before the huge turn against Taika). Just saying stuff like 'what do they even TALK about???' etc. They clearly though she was beneath him. I know people can date for shallow reasons, but it was the just so mean and disrespectful. Not even considering that he might actually like her for more than just her appearence.

As i'm typing this, im realising this might be another reason they work together (obligatory i don't know them), they both know what its like to be unfairly targeted and ridiculed by the media and the internet. It's one thing to sympathise with someone, it's another to actual have them understand how it feels.

Hey Anon! Sorry for the delay, trying to catch up on asks, lots of write ins the last couple days! Thanks! I think a lot of us are a lot more normal about Taika/Rita but the assholes tend to be louder. I LOVE that I'm seeing so many people since that IG post of his really rally together and start pushing back. You all are so inspiring and sweet! I know some people are being shits though on twitter so remember to block if people start getting nasty because no one needs that kind of abuse. Some super sweet folks here are getting harassed on twitter and I'm getting very mama bear about it. To your point, you're right, she's human, she makes mistakes, we all do, seriously. If you don't like her, fine but don't be a dick about it? Like spreading rumors and being shitty does nothing but make you feel better (the royal you, not you anon!). That's an interesting point, it's possible they bonded over their both having to deal with trolls, and it seems like their personalities really match up-- they're both goofy and fun, so having someone who has had that same kind of life experience would be really helpful supportwise.

I think what we've learned from all of this is that people are just dicks sometimes and if we can, ignore/block them because not everyone feels that way and the more voice we give them the more they'll shout.

Anyway, thanks for writing in anon, I'm so glad to hear there's so much love and support for Taika and Rita despite their faults. <3 The more we talk about it, the more it'll become normalized again and we can help make that happen.

Hope you have a lovely weekend anon! Take care!

[eddywoww]

Can I ask if I am being a judgmental bitch?

My friend and I got piercings a year or so ago. She got nipple piercings and they fully healed. She has now taken them out because she plans to have another kid. Which I totally understand and was chill with, but then she said it was always the plan to have another kid and breastfeed.

Which I feel judgmental cause I don't understand why she got the piercing when she was planning to remove them, cause its a waste of money in my mind? Her piercings are already healed over, and im feeling like im mentally being a bitch. I didnt say anything about it (she was texting me) but im also like ????

Don’t they complicate breastfeeding? Not that I would even know lmao

And nah I would also have the same thought, so maybe I’m a bitch. It’s just a small little “judgemental” thing and I don’t think it makes you mean. People like to pretend that we don’t all have moments where we’re like “wow that’s annoying” because everyone wants to appear as nice and sweet and likable but we’re all human and we’re all prone to random moments of annoyance

For instance, I have a hard time not being in control (big shocker) but I do stick and pokes and so does my sister. One time I had a friend come over that I’ve known for years and love very much. But she wanted to do one and that was fine, but she’d been drinking. I told her no, went to bed. She ended up talking my inebriated sister (who has a harder time saying no and is very anxious) into letting her do one. The tattoo turned out awful and to make it worse, she started trying to give us both advice on how to do them later. It’s the kind of thing that maybe someone else would have zero issue with but it pissed me off to no end. Do I think I’m a bad person for finding it annoying that she couldn’t wait? Or that she has a negative view of these types of tattoos now? No. Because it was done by her own hand and is therefore her own fault.

Idk, I feel like these things go on a case by case basis. You shouldn’t feel too bad about it. It’ll come and go, especially with friends. They’re human too, so they tend to do things you’ll dislike time and time again.

[plasmasimagination]

Hello, I'm here for the matchups!

The fandom I chose for is Danganronpa (V3), and I don't wish to be matched with Korekiyo and Tsumugi (sorry, personal vendettas)

Im 5"1 - 5"2, short black hair, brown eyes, and I'm basically fem representing (nonbinary). I have a little bit of chub but I hate it when people comment on it, since its something I have a sensitive spot on. Other than my appearance, I'm basically a victim of rbf (resting bitch face) syndrome and drive people away from it, alongside with looking scary appearance wise.

Despite this, I'm a kind person and very empathetic to those that I meet and am close to. I am loyal to my friends to a fault and if someone harms them, I end up standing by them in their stead to protect them. Although I have a bad temper and am extremely stubborn, which could lead to my misfortune at times when the situation calls for it.

I'm an Aries, and I enjoy a lot of hobbies— mostly writing, drawing, and even playing horror games! I have a knack with old horror RPG games because they are fun to solve with, even if I do get a little scared at times when it gets intense. I also enjoy VNs, my favorite being horror ones than romance (especially those with mysteries).

In my friend group, I'm the therapist friend and I accept that role wholeheartedly. I tend to be the one to give people advice, hear them out, and comfort them when needed be. Of course, it does lead to me burning out, but I shrug it off because it's something I can do on my own.

My favorites are definitely eating sweets, and being with my companions. I enjoy a good mystery as well, even if it wracks my brain. I don't enjoy riddles because I'm... Not too big brained for it (oops), and I don't enjoy blaming others for their mistakes.

I hope this is coherent orz, have a lovely day and keep up the good work!

— 🌸🍒

CUTIEEEPIEEE HAI HAI, this was easy to match hihi you didn't really mention if you want to get matched up with a guy or a gal for I'll just give you both ;D

Your match up is

.

.

.

SHUICHI

Everyone needs a shuichi in their life, even you

I think shuichi would fit you very well, it's like that meme "he asked for no pickles" YKWIM?

It's like you're hot tempered type of person and he'll just follow you around standing behind you to support you no metter what ToT

And if you get in any trouble for it, don't worry shuichi is there to save you

As you said you tend to be the therapist friend I think that shuichi would actually enjoy having someone wise / someone that can get him on the right path from time to time

But ofcourse you won't have to be alone either, he's a great listener and will always try to offer help and comfort when you're feeling down or burnt out

Shuichi will also, after some time of being together, get into the type of games and stuff you like and find great interest in it, so for your next game session dont forget to invite him so you can solve those mysteries together >:)

KAEDE

Two cuties omg

It's honestly giving that dark goth girlfriend X pink aestethic girlfriend

I think of you guys as like kuromi and my melody (personality wise idk how you dress lmao 🥹)

While shuichi is the one who's there to need comfort sometimes from you, kaede will be the one comforting you🫵

Like she's gonna grab into your soul and take out all the problems you have and sort them one by one-

That sounds weird but I would say kaede wouldn't be exhausting to be around for y'all and that she would lift your spirit a bit

Also you don't like riddles? Don't worry take a kaede, kaede can help you solve it, or not ¯⁠\⁠_⁠(⁠ツ⁠)⁠_⁠/⁠¯

[ethernetmeep]

i have an odd urge to speak a lot today. because of this, i’ve thought of a few different questions and what my answers would be to them. yes this is a little silly. i am separating this just so it doesn’t absolutely destroy someones timeline somewhere. read if you want

“what is your personal philosophy?”

ah, this is… a jarring one to start off with. nonetheless, i think its good to discuss! my personal philosophy is one not really falling under any blatant ones i know off the top of my head like nihilism or absurdism. although i agree with certain absurdism concepts, i like to sort of.. branch out. the following will be what i personally think, i guess;

i like to believe everything has meaning. every small microscopic organism, to the empire state building, to a small amount of chicken wire. everything has some beauty to it. even if it doesn’t have some which is blatant, everything has a sort of creative aspect of itself which is fascinating. i also like to believe things generally have a purpose. if something doesn’t have one which blossoms at the beginning, then a reason may appear in the future. who knows. i personally (someones name popped up when i typed that…? odd.) like to see everything in the world as being worth something, somewhere, somehow. i like to believe the world around me has the capacity to both be nice and hopelessly cruel. i believe everyone deserves the basic right to exist, even if i don’t necessarily agree with what they may believe. i like to think everyone deserves to be happy and live a comfortable life… of course, this comes off as a very kind of ‘peace’ narrative. you can’t always have peace; i know that. sometimes you have to fight to be happy, fight to live. its jarring, and i wish people didn’t have to do that; i wish we as people didn’t have to fight to be happy, that we were all allowed it from the get go. sadly that isn’t always the case. this might be a very odd answer so thats uh.. my bad. i just like the world around me although i realize its quite shitty. i most certainly have the capacity to be aware of many other human faults, but i like trying to put faith into things. if i can, anyway.

“do you consider yourself a good person?”

…haha, i should know better than to ask myself these questions. i think i’m asking the ones i wish i would get and simultaneously dread because they make me think and make me uncomfortable.

i.. don’t really consider myself anything. i don’t think of myself as good, nor do i consider myself.. bad. good and bad are feeble words we as humans use to try and put others into categories of being. i know this because i too have labeled others as good, although it doesn’t really do much besides surround a person with some loose narrative of what they may be like. i tend to flesh out when i say others are good people, however; i note their kind natures or kind actions and cite those as things which make them good in the sense they’re helpful and uplifting people to be around.

i… am…. Um. i.. don’t know. others say im a good person, but i wouldn’t label myself as quote good. that feels weirdly egotistical.

“what would you describe yourself as, if not good?”

just general things i do, i suppose. i consider myself someone who overthinks about many things, is abnormally sensitive, and is rather outgoing in the sense i like to help others. i guess im kind, but just because someone is kind doesn’t necessarily mean they’re a good person… i’m just, like, existent. i’m nothing special, truly. i don’t think i ever will be something special, just kind of mediocre, and im fine with that

“do you consider yourself a lover or a hater?”

lover, indefinitely. this is ironic, considering i for the almost entirety of my life thought love was sort of just something people made up, but it’s accurate. i seem to forget you can love things but not love them in a romantic sense. im just so blatantly used to the romantic love that general love is sometimes less apparent in my mind. i’ve been getting better at recognizing the general kind of love people feel..

by used to the romantic love, i mean more so in media. as mentioned above, i thought for a good chunk of my life romantic love was just.. fake. not real. embellished, false. i thought it was some weird social normality which i was never in on; i felt like an outcast to the whole idea. when i realized it was an actual thing, i remember having an existential crisis over it.

anyway, yeah, lover all the way. i hate very little people and hate very little things. i guess with that in mind..

“why are you so forgiving?”

man, a question i ask myself every single day. asked myself, from myself. god this post is probably weird to read.

ummm, lets see… i had to be emotionally mature at a young age, and because of that i seem to be a bit more mature than others in my age range when it comes to social miscommunications and whatnot. i also have realized it takes an immense amount of energy out of me whenever i think about events for an extended period of time. when i feel something emotionally, i feel it. it hits like a tidal wave. as you could possibly tell from any of my ramblings, i tend to be obsessive over very small things. and compulsive. and uh.. well.. i mean, its both a genetics result and simultaneously from upbringing that i seem to have these tendencies. its jarring to admit, but its true.

i think i also am a bit rational when it comes to these things.. but simultaneously not? unsure. what i think is that im not like.. petty. others around me have seemingly held the anger/distain i likely should, but i haven’t held much of it myself. i’m not the kind of person to insult others because of simple personal happenings. i don’t talk of others with distain even when i have every right to. i talk about others neutrally and almost matter-of-factly. if thats a word. not even, though; i mean, i talk neutrally, yes, but i also am not blindsided by emotions either. if some Guy clocks me in the face and is an amazing musician, i’m still gonna be honest and say he’s an amazing musician. its not because I’ve forgotten he’s clocked me in the face, not at all, but because i want to be honest with what im saying. someone can do something flawed and still have good parts to them; one action doesn’t define who someone is. people change & all that jazz

“why are you so honest?”

uh.. i guess because i hate lying to others. it makes me uncomfortable; like im putting up a façade. i like being my true self and saying whats on my mind; i also like being literal. although metaphors and allusions are always fun, i also wish to be direct with things which are important to me or in general are best said directly. being quietly uncomfortable and laughing nervously doesn’t get a point across; if someones being a dick, i’m gonna say that to them. vice versa, if someone is being extremely nice & or friendly, i’m going to tell them that and let them know! its just the way i prefer to function.

with honesty in mind, i guess its also worth saying i don’t like saying things i don’t necessarily mean. it makes me uncomfortable. if i tell you something/give a compliment, then i probably mean it. i don’t just ask or say things for no reason… good example of this is uh, i don’t know, asking if a friend needs anything. i mean, i mean it; if they need something ill try and get it. same with asking if an acquaintance needs anything. if i didn’t want to ask, i wouldn’t. if i didn’t want to do something, i probably wouldn’t do it; im very direct in that regard

“are you still afraid of not being your own person?”

…yes.

ive gotten better at being more, shall we say, level-headed, but its definitely a fear of mine. i forgot if a sentence im thinking of was actually said or simply internalization of what someone else said. either way, it fucked with me; made me think i was just a puppet on someone elses strings. i was petrified of this, as ive been trying what is essentially throughout my entire life to be my own person, be ‘myself’. learning i apparently wasn’t this was like a slap in the face. no, was a slap in the face. i still am reeling from it, as you can probably tell, but i believe my best way of thinking is this;

inevitably, everyone is affected by someone. you get affected by your guardians, friends, peers. you make friends with those with similar interests, or gain interests from being introduced to them. thats simply how human relations work. thats fine, thats normal. inevitably, nobody is a quote clean slate. i am not the same person i was before i met savanna, because her being in my life changed the way i functioned. people change people, is what im saying.

yet, despite this, you still have free reign of what you choose to do. i on my own volition go out of my way to do things which are pleasing to me. i may like the same movie you do, but you and i are separate entities. different people. we aren’t carbon copies of one another, as no human is really meant to be so. everyone is meant to be themselves in whatever sense of the word.

..although i still understand why it was a fear, because i can sometimes feel a compulsion to look into things others enjoy as almost a prerequisite to being a friend. i tend to be afraid being myself is simply not enough for others, as i don’t see what i necessarily bring to the table that someone else cannot. i feel as if im easily replaceable, even with others telling me i am not. i think ive been getting better at looking into things solely because i want to, but sometimes i still feel worried im not being enough of a friend, i guess

this is… augh, very emotionally vulnerable. hey at least i did something for like an hour. i might go to bed early

[apple-os]

okay some of the tags got cut off because i was going on too much but long story short i wanted ppl to talk about themselves and the way i do that is by talking about myself because i also expect that to just be the norm

and i am not going to change that for people who didnt even care to properly get to know who i am outside of joking and vidya gamez

communication is important and if u hide things from someone and expect them to know theyve hurt people despite everyone pretending everythings fine then thats on you

short story long tho ,,

ive said it here im autistic i cant always tell the vibe in places im unfamiliar with. got strong vibes of "i hate but like u" friendships in this one server. turned out to not be showing good enough vibes and fitting in well enough. because i was masking a little too heavily and not thinking about what i was saying before i said it

thought things were fine and dandy because im largely oblivious to a lot of things unless people tell me. i just figured folkz were fine with me talking about things i enjoyed or loved and myself because thats what most people tended to do when they wanted to be friends as...far as i knew

but here we are and ive been called pretentious for talking too much about myself and my girlfriend despite never having expressed that i wanted everything to be about me, quite the opposite in fact

my girlfriend whom ive been in love with for about a year now and only just became an item with so you can imagine why i talked about her a lot after everything thats happened between us

i never said nobody else could talk about themselves!! i got a little offended over a dumb joke once mainly because ive heard it so many times!! i talked about my country and its history and some culture and apparently people didnt like that either!! i made some kind of stupid jokes i wouldnt usually make in any other situation, like oh yes im a misogynist and oh yes i am definitely a transphobe when i am trans, and i have a girlfriend who i love very much!! said girlfriend is upset shes been spoken for, might i add

no i do not hate women! by god, NO, I AM NOT S/PERSTR/IGHT. im just a dumb obnoxious dude who is loud and talkative and tries to be approachable and occasionally fit in when they can

i can imagine this is more of a miscommunication than malice on some people's part, but i also am very mad that i wasn't even heard out before being called pretentious and being told i talk too much about somebody i love not to mention one of my friends was sidelined when trying to reason with the person who lashed out at me

i like talking about my gf,, so what? you know u can talk about your partner too yknow id love to hear it or i wouldve if not for the fact that u shut me down when i dont even know u and i thought we were bantering because u called ur friends and urself sigma for making sex jokes around minors as a minor urself but i also yknow wanted to express that i didnt like that in some way, which is one of the only issues i had with all of u up until this point i thought it would be funny and silly to say i didnt care if u folks were sigma. which sounds really silly put like that but anyway, i didnt express it was a joke well enough apparently and that led to the outburst

in some ways i can understand why the anger was there, but i cant understand why it was left to simmer for so long, nor can i really understand the need to trashtalk me behind my back [which im fairly certain was happening the way 2 ppl described me in the same ways and other reasons]

wont pretend im not at fault in some capacity. i shouldve used my head [and tonetags] when talking to others. but um. the communication error was the main problem and was largely not my fault so ,, idk what to say on that other than maybe set boundaries when you make friends next time ? anyway yeah thats all rant over

ppl who like making friends solely with one-note cardboard boxes who will hang out with them when it's convenient and never open up about who they are as people and what their lives are like dni

[y01te-moved]

it does not feel like the weekend at all but im so glad it is

[wipsings]

rain

rain rain rain.

it was all I heard as I leaned my head against the window of the bus that was taking me home. home at last.

i sigh and adjust my earbuds that kept falling loose out of my ear. the people passing by and rain racing down to the bottom of the window was my source of entertainment until my stop came. i was relieved.

i stood quickly as many others did, flooding out the door, leaving a few people left on the bus. as I step down from the platform onto a step, a hand holds my arm. getting defensive, my head snaps up and I am about to jerk my arm back until I see the eyes of my very own boyfriend. i squeal and jump onto him, to which he holds my backside as my legs go around his torso. he holds me with the same hand he held my arm with, and the umbrella in another. i Lift my head from his shoulder to see an old woman who was smiling at us quickly look away once we made eye contact.

“i missed you.” my muffled voice says almost in a sad tone, as he walks us to my apartment. “i missed you more.”

i was almost shocked at how much lower his voice had gotten since the last time we saw each other.

even with conversations on the phone, i hasn’t noticed. or it was just lower in person.

i smile to myself and continue to rest my head on him, then I realize what a burden it must be. “let me.” i say, and hop down from his arms to the floor. i take the umbrella from his freezing hands, to which I hiss. “taehyung.” i scold, as though that was his fault. “what?,” he asks, looking down at me. “how many times did I tell you to wear gloves when it’s cold out? it’s just like the socks thing.”

he never wears his damn socks. then when we go to bed his feet are freezing.

“it’s not snowing.” he defends, to which I slap his arm. “and no, let me. besides, you’re only hurting me by holding it. it’s much too low.”

i can hear the smirk in his voice despite my huge hood covering my head, and, with his tall body, his head being 10ft above mine.

i scoff and fold my arms, “so it’s like this isn’t it, little boy?”

“Little Boy?”

“You’re forgetting im older than you.”

“Of course not.”

i shake my head and a smile makes its way to my lips. we walk side by side on the packed streets of everyone trying to get home for the holidays. it was silent, but a comfortable one. the kind you don’t mind.

though after a few minutes, i break the silence. he tends to space out, and we were reaching a cross walk.

“how are the boys?,” i ask as he looks left and right, holding the small of my back and leading me through the crosswalk. he lifts a hand to thank the driver and we reach the other end.

“they’re good. jeongguk’s mixtape is out soon.” he tells me, to which I gasp and look at him. his manager swore to kill if any of them told any of the plans of their group. he swiftly winks and the remain is a grin that doesn’t leave his face. i shake my head,

“you know you’re dead if I spill.”

“you won’t.”

“will I?”

“shae.” he says in a scolding tone, to which I grin.

“fine.”

———-

💋

comment for a part two?

[iwaisuke]

i like you so much, you'll know it

ft. kageyama tobio, semi eita, iwaizumi hajime x fem!reader

genre: fluff (prompts are based off lines of the song)

masterlist

a/n: from the c-drama a love so beautiful :) i wrote this at like 4am so sorry if its crap haha. not proof read either. also, sorry in advance if they're too ooc lol im a mess rn.

» ˚⸙͎۪۫⋆

i like your eyes, you look away when you pretend not to care i like the dimples on the corners of the smile that you wear. i like you more the world may know but dont be scared cause im falling deeper baby be prepared.

» today was your first day at karasuno highschool. honestly, you were so scared. that was up until you found out kageyama was going too.

» the two of you had been childhood friends due to each others grandparents knowing the others. you had been with him through his ups and downs. his victories and defeats. almost everything kageyama did, you were there with him.

» actually, you didnt know kageyama was going to karasuno until you walked outside your door to find the raven haired boy in the same school uniform as you

» "tobi? you never told me you were going to karasuno?" giving him a side eyed grin. "i thought you were planning on going to aoba johsai like oikawa senpai and iwaizumi senpai"

» you viewed kageyama as someone who expected others to reach his level in order to be a good match for him. he had a strong head on his shoulders. naturally gifted in volleyball, like everything was given to him on a gold platter. of course, he wasnt perfect and thats where you come in and keep him level headed. helping him understand his faults and weaknesses as well. doing your best to encourage the setter

» he let out a sigh. a slight frown forming on his face. "i didnt get in.." he quietly said. "karasuno has a good volleyball team though and i can feel myself growing here" he stated bodly

» and boy was he right. something about kageyama did changd that day. he usually was so bitter and angry. a very pessimistic look on life if he and others weren't at the top. maybe it was the orange haired boy, hinata, that the setter and you became friends with. and maybe it was his great senpai's who were patient with him and gave him the opportunity to grow

» kageyama started smiling more often. his small unnoticeable dimples showing. he became kinder. softer. and more carefree. he was a growing boy both mentally and physically.

» what you didnt realize was that not only was kageyama changing, you as well, had something changing and growing in your heart.

» but kageyama noticed. oh boy did he really notice, the way you seemed to become happier and livelier by the day. how the stars sparkled in your eyes when you talked about something you enjoyed. the kind of perfume you would wear and how you would tie your hair differently each day. the weird trinkets you just seemed to love that decorated your bag. but most importantly, how much bigger your heart has become, loving everyone and their faults. always encouraging and motivating him and his team.

» was she always like this? he would constantly think to himself. all of a sudden being hyperaware about you... but he would NEVER let you know that, let alone his senpai's. it was just too embarrassing. just thinking about the never ending teasing he'd get from tanaka and noya senpai made him shiver.

» all of these things he felt about you hit kageyama like a truck the day everyone started to wear their winter uniforms.

» picking you up to walk to school together was a normal thing since the two of you lived close, but how was kageyama suppose to do this now when you're standing in front of him. thigh high socks to keep your legs warm, an oversized jacket that you had borrowed from him a while back you forgot to return. white mittens to cover your cold hands and the slight blush on your face from the wind chill.

» "does it look weird?" you shyly asked. kageyama was silent. "ah.. give me a second. I'll go back in and change real qui-"

» kageyama tugged on your hand. "its fine. lets just go to school or we'll be late." refusing to look you in the eyes. heat rising to your cheeks as tobio dragged you along with him.

» your feelings for the setter had blossomed over the past few months. falling deeper and deeper into him, and at this point you felt like you couldnt hide it anymore. you just had to tell him. tell him all the wonderful things he's done. the way he's grown and how much he means to you.

» "tobi..." your soft voice spilling out. eyes closed, the fog of your breath coming out as you exhaled. "i lik-"

» you felt something wrap around your neck. "wait y/n..." kageyama spoke, interrupting what you were about to say. not gonna lie, you felt like your heart was about to be shattered like ice eventhough kageyama continued to wrap his scarf around your neck.

» "dont say it..." he quietly said as he began to walk forward without you.

» ah... is this what rejection feels like? i didnt even get to say it properly... your hands felt colder now that kageyama wasnt holding them anymore.

» he took a quick glance back at you. blush on his cheeks. "be prepared because i want to be the one to tell you first."

i like the way you try so hard when you play ball with your friends. i like the way you hit the notes in every song you're shinnin' i love the little things like when you're unaware, i catch you steal a glance and smile so perfectly

» semi eita, your 3 year heart throb from the moment he first spoke to you.

» at first, you had suppressed these feelings, telling yourself he would never look at you the same way. but something about the blonde tsundere struck a chord in your heart that you just couldn't forget.

» the two of you ended up becoming friends. closer than you had actually imagined within these past 3 years. doing everyday life with you. waking up and saving you a spot at breakfast. helping you with your studies in exchange for being his workout buddy and motivator.

» semi kept his tabs on you. your likes and dislikes. the things that made you smile and the things that made you groan in disgust, but he would never let you know that.

» to semi, you were his breath of fresh air. the song he has on repeat everyday. the kind of person who would keep him on his toes. in a good way of course

» "oi what are you daydreaming of this time?" semi asked as you zoned out while drinking your carton of strawberry milk. "hm? oh nothin. just thinkin about whats in store for us today!" reaching your arms above your head letting out a stretch. "i just know for a fact. today is gonna be a good day." semi chuckled at your optimistic claim. "how do you know for sure?" "i dont know how. i just do" you replied with a smile on your face.

» today, shiratorizawa had a practice match with aoba johsai and today, eita was picked to be in the starting line up. the pure joy that radiated from his body. maybe today was a really good day just like how you had said.

» semi took a quick glance up into the stands, you gave him a thumbs up and wished him good luck. his smile was brighter than you had ever seen it and his eyes shined like stars. he always told you that whatever chance he got on the court, he would be sure to not let his team down no matter what. he was in his zone. playing his best and sure enough, they had won all 3 matches.

» after practice, semi and you would hang out at his dorm afterwards. he liked to show you all the new songs he was working on. whether it was a cover or a song or a song he was writing on his own.

» the two of you leaned against the wall as you sat on semi's bed. his sheet music all sprawled out before him on his bed sheets. guitar in his arms and you beside him.

» "what are you working on semi?" "a song" "well obviously dum dum" you laughed, reaching out for a paper in front.

» "so who's the special lady?" you teased him as you read the lyrics. deep down inside you could only wish these words were meant for you. a blush formed on eita's face. "just... shut up about it... its not ready yet"

» it was getting late and falling asleep at semi's place was a normal occurrence at this point. your eyes became heavy and your head started bobbing.

» "sleepy?" eita asked as he noticed your eyes drooping. "mhm. sing for me semi? please?" his voice was so soft like a mothers touch yet somehow had the power to pierce through your soul sometimes. although, it never failed to help you fall asleep when you needed it.

» hesitantly, semi started humming. softly speaking some lyrics here and there. you didnt know where the tune was from so you listened the best you could.

» "... till the last of snow dissapears ... till a rainy day, becomes clear. never knew a love like this, now i can't let go..."

» your eyes had closed. slumber taking over you as you fell onto semi's shoulder.

» "im in love with you... and now you know..."

» yeah. today was a good day. just like you said it was going to be.

in a world devoid of life, you bring color. in your eyes i see the light, my future. always and forever i know i cant let you go. im in love with you and now you know

» to iwaizumi, unlike volleyball, oikawa, maki, mattsun, school, anything life threw at him; you were the thing in his life that was constant yet at the same time a whirlwind of new beginnings. not in a bad way though.

» ever since you were kids, you showed iwaizumi the beauty in things he would have never guessed had. he was bold and tended to look over things without giving them much thought. his eyes straight ahead to the trials before him. you on the other hand, stopped him and slowed him down from rushing into them blindly.

» "every moment is precious. you should learn to cherish it because you never know when it's gonna be your last" you always said

» your views of the world were beautiful compared to how cruel it actually was. naivety maybe? or maybe it was just because you were blessed with a kind soul.

» iwaizumi always knew he had feelings for you. you had been with him through thick and thin. he could depend on you and you could depend on him. in his eyes, you were the most beautiful person on earth. deep down he had hoped the two of you could stay like that forever. nothing could ever change that.

» or so he thought...

» "iwa chan~ you owe me a meat bun" oikawa whined as the group of friends were walking to the gym for volleyball practice. "shut up crappykawa. i already bought you one last week" "oi isn't that y/n over there?" maki said, shaking iwaizumi's shoulder.

» sure enough it was you. apparently you had told iwaizumi to go ahead of you today because you had something to take care of in the afternoon. telling him you'd meet up with him after practice was over. not thinking much of it, he bid you a farewell and went on in his day.

» "oooou by the looks of it, this is the perfect confession scene" mattsun teased. "oi stop messing around" iwaizumi's voice hoarse. not gonna lie, iwaizumi felt his heart drop when mattsun said that

» the 4 boys crept closer to see what was going on.

» there you were, standing in the middle of a classroom with a black haired boy. "mhm. definitely a confession." oikawa stated. "shut up tooru we cant hear" maki retorted.

» you weren't considered popular in school but that didnt mean people didnt know who you were. iwaizumi knew you were gorgeous and on top of that, smart, kind and one of the sweetest girls, so it was only natural that people would be drawn to you.

» they watched as the boy got closer and closer to you. voices barely being audible to the 4 boys outside. iwaizumi's heart could bear to see this right before his eyes.

» without even thinking, his feet moving on his own, iwaizumi barged into the room. all eyes towards him.

» "iwa what are you-" without letting you finish, iwa dragged you out of the classroom. "iwa where are you taking me" asking him as he took you to who knows where, leading you up the stairs of the school.

» up on the roof, he finally let go. "sorry..." he mumbled.

» "sorry for what iwa?" "for ruining that confession... i just-"

» "you just...-?"

» "i just love you ok?!"

» your heart shook at the resonance of his voice. iwa liked you? he liked you back?! wait no- he loved you.

» you had loved iwaizumi from the moment you met him and as the two of you grew up, your love for him only grew deeper. he was the only one you'd ever look at. the only one who would ever cross your mind. you had hoped he felt the same about you but he was always so busy with other things you only felt like you would be able to support him on the sidelines as he faced the world head on like he always does.

» just being in iwaizumi's presence was enough for you. no need to be greedier, you thought. its good to be content with what you have, but just knowing that he shares the same feelings... its ok to be a little greedy right?

» your silence being louder than it should have been, iwaizumi took it the wrong way. "look I know this isn't the greatest confession. heck it's not even the way I wanted to confess to you, and get it if you like that other guy, you don't have to-"

» shuting him up with a kiss, you wrapped your arms around his neck, pulling him in closer. needless to say, he was shocked, but embraced you as well.

» "you're overthinking too much iwa. that's so unlike you" you chuckled. his face bright red at the previous actions.

» "i love you. I've loved you for a long time actually. every single second. every moment we've shared. i cant picture myself with anyone but you hajime."

» iwa let out a sigh of relief. a smile being brought back onto his face. "good because all I know is that i cant let you go. in the past, present and even in the future...."

» the blue sky slowly changing into shades of coral warmed your heart even more on top of his sweet words that you've always longed to hear.

» "im in love with you, and now you know"

-» ˚⸙͎۪۫⋆

enjoy your order! have a great day!

[mamahoggs]

hey, i kinda fell in love with your oc's, can you tell me more about kassandros and pauline??

djkfskjdfjsd im so glad you like them omg.... to be honest there's not much more to say about them other than what was in their intro posts as they're both still kinda new lol and i tend to develop my ocs over long periods of time with a lot of back and forth BUT i will provide thee with some vague musings i've come up with

although he certainly doesn't act like it, kassandros is actually one of the oldest vampires currently active-- he was born in athens during the 5th century bce and while he doesn't know exactly who sired him, it's widely suspected he was made by a woman only known as the original, or the first vampire in ancient history. in his mortal life, he was born a poor weaver's son but became revered for his beauty and made a name for himself as a model and muse, so much so that he'll happily point out at every. fucking. museum which pieces he's technically in.

as a person, he is deeply vain and equally oblivious, he needs to be the center of attention and will cause problems on purpose if he's not. he'll drink your victims, he'll leave bodies on the lawn, and if he gets blood all over your prized persian rug? no he didn't and you can't prove he did. every clan he's stayed with hates him and doesn't want him back, so he's mostly taken to living on his own, but he's convinced himself its a personal choice and not because he's intolerable.

although the age of renaissance painters and poets is mostly gone, he's found a new outlet for feeding off the attention of creatives and creative strangers: becoming an internet micro-celebrity. as far as anyone's concerned, the whole vampire thing is just a silly gimmick.

kassie's wiped out every vampire slayer that's come after him, so much so that the greater slayer community considers him untouchable... a sort of trophy kill no one's been brazen enough to go after. until now.

♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡

pauline really only stumbled on the slayer life by accident. before she was staking the undead, she spent her days taking on way more college classes than a normal person should and being the hot goth cashier at a local supermarket. the burn across her face? cooking oil accident-- she's not the best chef.

having come from a long line of successful accountants and hardware store owners, pauline's more rebellious nature meant she had little interest in the mundane life of someone who tells you which wrench to buy for what, or how to manage your savings-- she wanted meaning, she wanted purpose, and she found that in art. after graduating high school, she went off to art school with the intent to study art history on the side but didn't make it far before her actual destiny found her.

although vampire killing was something she didn't think would become her whole life, after she accidentally killed one when he tried to follow her home (it's not her fault he fell onto a picket fence and turned to dust), they just kept popping up around her. what started as a nuisance quickly became some kind of... calling. she thinks, anyway.

the hunter community is small, and she made her way up the ladder fast, becoming something of a mercenary for those with a genuine bloodsucker problem. now, she's the best of the best, a modern day van helsing.

as a person, pauline is actually deeply introverted and more than a little awkward-- she has a handful of fronts she puts on, little masks she's invented to get through the day (and night). being an infamous slayer helps take the edge off, but when she's not in her safe little cocoon of weirdos, that bravado crumbles. if her social avoidance comes across as mysterious, in her mind, that's better than people knowing its really just because other human beings terrify her. luckily, this works in her favor-- after all, it's hard to make connections when not everyone understands the intricacies of hunting the undead.

pauline started hunting kassandros not because she felt she had anything to prove, but rather it felt like something she was supposed to do, another piece in this weird destiny thing she's gotten herself wrapped up in. that and, if she has to see one more damn fancam of him, she's going to throw up.

if only he wasn't so damn slippery.

[linawritestwst]

Hello, congrats on your milestone!! Can I request something for the matchup event?

My pronouns are They/Them and my gender is Non-Binary

I dont have preferences regarding dorms (though I'd prefer someone 18 or over if its ok), and in a partner I suppose I feel drawn to those who give me a feeling of safety and security, who are fun to be with and who I can lean to, but also someone who I can talk to about almost anything in general (maybe who dosent mind infodumping?). Someone who's keen on pda even if in private, and wouldnt mind me being relatively clingy (I just like spending a lot of time w/ those I hold dear)

I do not, however, would like to date someone who's far too serious or perhaps sadistic? Manipulative or toxic in general. While I do like it, I dont ask for gentleness, simply to not have my trust be tampered with (many have done so in the past so)

Appearence wise, Im 1.65m tall, I have short wavy hair, brown skin and dark brown eyes. I wear glasses and tend to go for either jeans and hoodies or skirts and jackets (my favorite aesthetic is Dark Academia though Im yet to fully pull an outfit like that—But I am trying!)

Personality wise, Im fairly mature, usually been called the parent friend; Im an introvert but one that can still reach out and meet new people, albeit at times my shyness comes up to me, other than that Im rather calm but I have a tendency to talk a lot when it comes to things I have an interest in. Im slightly hot headed, and stand for myself whenever I need to, but Im also a bit of a crybaby(angry crier is at fault here too). To those I care deeply about Im gentle and kind-hearted, usually trying to do what's best for everyone, while also keeping myself in check. I like to write(poetry or fanfics) and draw, Im a psy. major and Im interested in philosophy, astrology and literature(horror-drama) (to not say psychology too)

My main three are Aries(sun), Saggitarius(Rising) and Cancer(Moon), and my mbti is Infj-T

hi, i hope you like your matchup! also your request made me realize just how many third years in twst are manipulative/sadistic/too serious hdjksdksks

the character that i think would be a good partner for you is..

lilia vanrouge!

i'll explain why i chose him:

i think lilia fits your description of what you want in a partner pretty well, you'd feel safe around him (because who would want to mess with lilia's s/o), he's definitely a fun-loving type and even though it may not seem like it sometimes, he's very reliable and he's a good listener. he wouldn't mind you being clingy at all, he may tease you a little bit about it, but he will give you all the attention you need!

i have a feeling that lilia would totally understand your love for dark academia aesthetic and he would help you find outfits like that! also you two both have a "parent friend" energy, so you may bond over that. he'd also think it's cute that you're shy most of the time, but you talk a lot about your interests.

lilia would respect you for being able to stand up for yourself and if you cry, he would help you calm down. your emotions and feelings are valid! he also would share your interest in psychology, literature, etc and would love to talk to you about it!

[legends-live-in-memories]

I Have Too Many Opinions. ep. 1

lmao. i got encouragement to post my opinions on fandom things and now i want to make a miniseries doing just that. so here i am. doing just that.

im putting it under the cut cuz this was 4 whole pages including the disclaimer. yes i put a disclaimer and i explain why.

Anyways, here is the first piece in what inevitably will become fandom info dump, this time on thomas astruc’s writing on miraculous ladybug. but only some of my opinions cuz we would be here all day otherwise.

So… a disclaimer before I begin… 

I do not hate Miraculous: Tales of Ladybug and Chat Noir (yes i'm using their government name). I am quite a fan of the show actually despite its faults. I am also older than the intended audience but was obviously younger when the show first aired which is how my interest was piqued (the fact that its been 6 years and only 3 seasons says more about the show than me being a fan for that amount of time but also i never want to rush content creators cuz they're doing their best) and due to my age, there will be inherent bias in my approach of what i'm about to say as there is in EVERY opinion. The fact that it is an opinion should imply the presence of bias but most people tend to lack the critical thinking skills required to draw that conclusion ANYWAYS…

If I did hate the show I would not have this blog nor would I be even writing this because i tend to not give more than 2 seconds of thought to things i actively dislike (some of yall should give this a try) and i'm allowed to like things that are designed for an audience that i was originally a part of but grew out of. (I don't suddenly stop liking things because I'm older despite what many younger fans seem to believe about older audiences. I also don't need to be ‘allowed’ to do anything cuz i wasn't asking for permission anyways.)

This will not be character bashing, astruc bashing nor fandom bashing cuz, again, that would imply i hate any of those elements and if i did, i would not dedicate brainpower to them. Analyses and criticisms of media are fun and engaging and required if you wish to produce good enjoyable content. Now most of this should be already assumed and self-explanatory but people on the internet like to play morality roulette roll dice on purity culture and I rather have documentation that I am in fact not bullying fictional 14 year olds or a grown man. But alas, people get trigger happy whenever someone has less than 1000000% positive opinions on something they like and will throw out words they can't define (gaslight, baiting, toxic, problematic, gatekeep etc) in an attempt to defend their blind devotion, 

which is not needed, if you like something you never have to defend it, even if i don't like it. If you respond to anything I post saying you disagree with me, I will not argue with you. I won't debate back and forth and try to convince you that the things you like are wrong. Unless you are being absolutely tone deaf to what i'm saying, you wont get a negative reaction from me. So don't try to fish for a fight. Please. I got metaphorical hands for days and I'm mean, you don't want me hurting your feelings on the internet. Do yourself the favour. Difference of opinion is how we get diversification in media and is inherently a good thing. Now that that's out of the way, please don't ever let me have to say that again. I beg.

Now onto the fun stuff

I didn't know what I wanted as a first topic so my trusty internet friend @moonlitceleste suggested astruc’s writing… 

AND BOI do i got some opinions on ole tommy boi. Again I don't hate the dude. In fact, he has worked on a few shows that had defined my childhood, including but not limited to W.I.T.C.H. (all eps available on youtube for those interested, 2 seasons, general fun time all around).

So I don't think he’s scum of the earth but I do think his approach to writing mlb specifically has more misses than hits.

The first big miss is that he has no idea how to write 14 year old girls. At all. Almost every girl he has ever written feels like some terrible archetype built entirely for marketability and childish projection and pubescent self-insert (kind of). He has never been a 14 year old girl. I have. In fact when the show first aired, I WAS around the (assumed) age of the mlb characters. The behaviour he passes off as quirky or awkward or just the character’s genuine personality tend to perpetuate harmful stereotypes of teen girls found in the media and are never actually addressed as harmful. they just get swept under the rug. Marinette’s exuberant collage of teen heart throb model boi Adrien Agreste and her very painful almost fan worship she has of him (which flip flops like a paper sandal in the rain) being portrayed as a cute school girl crush uwu, Chloe being the y7 Regina George, Alya being the token best friend of colour with her ‘sassy’ personality (i want y'all to imagine me eyerolling so hard i bust a vessel in my eye), Kagami being the very damaging Perfect Asian Child stereotype. And before y'all get on your dusty soap box and defend going on about “BUT IT'S FOR CHILDREN”,,,, know this.

 i don’t give a solid fuck. 

Not one. 

Children arent stupid. Children are always going to remember the richy bitchy blonde who bullies the art kid, and the big kid, and the shy kid, and the non white kids, and was only nice to her equally rich white friend who she probably had a crush on or was only ever civil to her equally white lapdog. They're going to remember the half asian girl who was never allowed to actually be asian or the only black girl who existed solely as a soundboard for enabling bad habits or chastising the main character for the same habits she enables in the first place (boi aint THAT a topic for later). Like do i really need to explain that alya chastising marinette for taking max’s spot in gamer just to play with adrien rings absolutely hollow when she actively encourages her to sabotage the contest she’s in just so Kagami doesn't win?? Like I don't have to explain that right?? Again kids arent stupid and its quite something that Mari gets chastised for proving herself the best video game player regardless of her intentions just cuz it comes at the expense of max’s feelings/ego but is actively encouraged to sabotage not only kagami but herself by extension cuz kagami is ‘competition.’ Adrien is not a trophy to be won. And no I don't expect 14 yrs old to be perfect and to always make good decisions but these decisions are never addressed as being bad decisions. they get swept under the rug cuz those decisions were necessary for the ‘plot’ but astruc can barely keep characterization consistent and his characters suffer for it and it's the same children you preach are watching it that suffer as well. Cuz guess what? I KNOW 14 yr olds aren't like that cuz i've been there done that (this is the last time i'm saying that i promise) so I know astruc is just metaphorically throwing darts to figure out who says and does what without consideration for pre established personalities to drive the stalemate plot along. The same kids you say are watching this don't know that that's not how preteens work and will absorb and internalize those dynamics like baking soda and vinegar. Cata-fucking-strophically. 

And I haven't even gotten to the boys yet. Which honestly doesn't require much explanation anyways cuz they suffer the same fate as the girls. Tired archetypes with nothing to give them life. Nino falls into Adrien’s person of colour token best friend who dates the female lead’s person of colour token best friend so they can have cute double dates uwu. Except the plot goes nowhere and we have no inclination of romantic development beyond moments that only act to actively convince me to anti ship the lovesquare (i don't want to do that so i self indulge in fanon that actually cares about the characters and plot. may i interest you in True Sight on AO3?). Max is the residential nerd but it doesn't matter (cuz he and everyone are dumbed down for the sake of ‘plot’), kim is the sports jock (which interestingly subverts the asian comedic relief stereotype but only barely) and luka is cute older guy ™ that wears black nail polish and is in a band. The point of all this is to say there is no depth in the characters. It's especially blatantly obvious with the characters astruc doesn't like (chloe). Again, it being a show for kids is not an excuse to be absolved of putting effort into the characters you make.

This is one of the biggest misses astruc has. I haven't even gone into all the nuances of this particular miss. And i havent gone into how that works against him in the plot either. Mostly because the plot itself hasn't gone anywhere and partially because I wanted to go into the plot (or lack thereof) separately as its own miss. 

AND BOI is it a miss. 

SO home boy astruc wanted to reap the benefits of a serial show with ‘engaging’ plot without putting in any of the work to make a linear storyline and relying on the episodic format for, again, marketability. You can't have the best of both worlds, you are not Avatar: The Last Airbender. Which btw has a lot less episodes and a desired end goal that didn't involve top dollar. Legend of Korra did but that's not the point and it had its failings with that too. I challenge you, tell me how many episodes actually contribute towards a plot point or introduce new thematic elements to the show? Can you name them? I can and I'm going to include the plot points that moved the story in some direction if only temporarily. Yes only temporarily for some of these and i will explain later. (if you're in the server you already saw this list *wink*)

25/26. Origins- self explanatory, the beginning of the story, 

24. Volpina- introduction of the grimoire and Master Fu (kind of) and no, Lila is not a plot point,

28. The Collector- proper introduction of Master Fu,

37. Sapotis- introduction of Rena Rouge,

41. Syren- introduction of new aquatic power ups,

44. Anansi- introduction of Carapace,

47. Frozer- introduction of new ice power ups,

48/49. Style Queen- introduction of Queen Bee,

51/52. Heroes’ Day- introduction of Mayura and mass akumatization,

66. Startrain- introduction of Pegasus,

67. Kwami Buster- Marinette wears multiple miraculouses,

68. Feast- backstory as to how the miraculouses were lost,

69. Ikari Gozen- introduction of Ryuko,

70. Timetagger- introduction of Bunnyx,

71. Party Crasher- introduction of Roi Singe and Viperion,

73. Chat Blanc- alternate timeline that essentially means nothing but got a reaction out of fans anyways (myself included)

 77/78. Love Eater/Battle of Miraculous- Marinette becomes guardian and other heroes lose their miraculous,

New York Special- other heroes exist and there is an American miraculous box,

That's 21 episodes. 21 out of a heaping 78 plus 2 specials. Everything else was just your typical akuma of the day episode and everything that happened outside that had no lasting consequences on the plot thanks to the miraculous status quo. Was it entertaining to watch Lila stir the plot of the class dynamic? Hell yeah. Too bad it meant nothing by the end of the episode cuz we were struck with miraculous status quo. She literally doesn't appear again until Heroes Day. that is from episodes 25 all the way to 51, she means nothing and yet she is treated with the severity of a b-villain/rival thing. She means nothing by the end of Volpina if I'm being honest. She is only relevant for 20 mins of episode time she’s in then it's back to magic status quo that undoes any shift in dynamics and relationships. It's like Spongebob who can't get his driver’s license. The worst part is I actually like Lila and I wish the story treated her with the seriousness we as an audience are expected to treat her with. Despite being painfully inconsequential by the end of each of the 3?? 4?? episodes she’s in, it's entertaining to watch a character create drama just because. 

Too bad it means nothing.

Astruc is constantly building up suspense to something ‘important’ only for it to not deliver and fans are constantly having the rug pulled out from under us. Oblivio teased us with a reveal only that gets undone cuz memory akuma. Chat Blanc teased us with romantic development but that gets undone cuz time travel bullshit. Feast introduced more miraculous lore and the history of the guardians but that means nothing by the next episode or ever (i'm not including any reference to the season 4 trailer cuz i've been around the block a few times and im familiar with this lil dancy dance). Heroes Day teased us with a possible future team of heroes but that gets undone in Battle of Miraculous cuz ????? why?? (here's why; astruc was having a jolly ole time letting us know how irredeemable Chloe is at the expense of shooting his own stagnant plot in the foot. Again, discussion for later.)

Too bad anything that slightly swerves off course from the akuma of the day gets undone or ignored. Too bad nothing has any lasting consequence. I mean, if anything did, the episodes would have had a consistent order and release schedule so im not scrambling to watch the leaked ep in Portuguese or something while the french dub is two episodes behind while the english version hasnt even been dubbed. I really wonder how he plans to conclude the show when he’s so afraid to step out of the corner he painted himself in.

Again, not going into nuances. If you want you can ask for more specifics (i doubt anyone would) but this is really just a slightly detailed general overview of my opinions on astruc’s writing. 

I was going to include another miss in his approach to this show but imma save that for another time. 

How’s that for a ‘first’ post?

[sanstropfremir]

Okay, time for my weekly rant so buckle up. The vocal stages were okay-I cant really remember them well because I watched them only once so take what I say with a grain of salt. Well I watched the Spark one once and I only got through half of the other one because I can’t stand ballads especially when there’s no interesting movement on stage to keep me engaged. Like it’s no fault of the members themselves or the song (I actually think their singing was incredibly beautiful and Eunkwang always sings like his wife just left him with the kids which is how you know he’s good) but I physically could not pay attention. That’s why I liked the spark stage a bit better-there was enough movement that I was able to focus on it. I really liked the use of the fire and the way they were walking in and out of the frame trading off parts so there weren’t too many awkward moments where the other members where on stage but not doing anything. The opening was gorgeous with each members being lit by the spotlight as they harmonize. So stagewise, I prefer Spark but vocally I think the other group was stronger. I love Spark and Taeyon is such an incredible vocalist (I mean the song is great because of her) so I don’t get why their delivery was, I don’t want to say weak, but subdued might be a better word. The only one that really stood out was Junhoe (but also that man couldn’t not stand out even if he tried, not with that incredibly rasp) and even he seemed to be holding himself back a bit. Though it was a bit slow it built up well to the two last choruses but still the first half could have been stronger. I know they were trying to draw it out to a strong pay off but I don’t really know if it was enough. And yes the suits were *chef’s kiss*. I think at this point in their career the FNC stylist has put SF9 in so many suits they’ve got it down to a science. Also I’m a sucker for those shirts with the triangle cut out and we got not one but two of them here.

Okay moving on, I’m not sure which group was next but I’ll talk about the Ikon stage. It seems like they finally realized that they’re on a performance based competition show so they decided to pull out the big guns. Love the little skit at the beginning (making sure people don’t forget that they’re YG), it was cute and refreshing. I really appreciated how they leaned into the campy acting in this stage (Stray kids did it too-just adding to the similarities between their stages). The song was meh but I also don’t really like BP especially not their recent stuff so it’s not a big deal. I would have preferred if they had gone with another song maybe Whistle or As If It’s Your Last or if they’d done a 2NE1 song like Chanwoo mentioned some point in the episode. I also think the stage would have been way smoother if they’d let Ikon and Lisa interact. Like if the boys appeared in her set after her section and then they all moved back to the first jungle set and then the whole thing turns gold and they did a dramatic outfit change (but with better jackets because theirs look like they came out of Party City). I also get what you mean about the dancers outfits not being that great. I actually really liked the outfits of Lisa’s dancers in isolation but they didn’t match with her or the set so they threw me off a bit. At least with the ikon members they were going for a modern look so the dancers outfits didn’t look that strange in comparison. Do you think it would have been better if they were white? How would you have improved then? The best way I can describe this performance was that it was a stage, stuff happened, I enjoyed myself but I don’t plan to revisit it anytime soon. Oh and we also have to give points for them cursing on national television not once but twice (at this point Jinwan deserves to say fuck).

Now to Stray Kids. So I feel like I need to preface this with the fact that I am actually a stray kids fan (I won’t call myself a stay because I don’t associate with the fandom) and though I’ve been really critical of them and their stages tend to be my least favorite I still have a soft spot for them (I got into this show because of them after all). I loved, loved, loved the intro with Felix (and yes his biggest flaw is that he’s Australian but I forgive him for it) and the way it immediately transitions into the chorus of DDD-the abrupt transition does fit really well with the Deadpool theme and I guess it is the closest they’re going to get to the feeling of yeeting themselves into traffic like in the movie. Interesting choice to start with the chorus. Now that I’m rewatching it I do really wish they stuck with the comic theme. I think that’s my gripe with SKZ-they have a lot of good ideas but they move on too quickly from them. Just pick a handful of things and sprinkle them throughout instead of cycling through them at breakneck speed. Like okay they’re doing Deadpool and he’s a comic character so keep the comic styling (it would have been a good thing to put in the projection behind Seungmin’s scene), maybe in the subway they could have had some fight choreo so the guns coming in at Lee Knows part aren’t out of nowhere (also someone please tell me they were trying to recreate the meme with the cat and the knives, please I need to know). I absolutely agree that them having a goal or an antagonist would have really helped the story along. I mean they literally have a spoken intro so why couldn’t Felix just tell us who they were fighting (and I’m pretty sure in the movie Wade tells us he’s trying to kill Francis in that scene sooo). As always they put more focus on the rappers (please can we get less Changbin and more Seungmin, Jeongin, or Lee Know or at least give Felix more parts). Seungmin was the real mvp of this stage and he had the best outfit (I think it qualifies for Hanya’s best gay little outfit list). Personally I with they hadn’t gone with Gods Menu again. I’ve been hoping that they would perform My Pace (and maybe remix it with their B-side TA off their Go Live album) because that would be such a fun stage. Again, I enjoyed myself but I won’t revisit it anytime soon. At this point the only groups I actually look forward to are BTOB and SF9 (they’re doing fucking Move and I don’t know whether to be excited or terrified-there’s a clip of Taeyang covering Move from a variety show or interview and I think he does it really well so I know at least one of them can pull it off). Again thanks for creating space where I can info dump and I hope I said something of interest to you!

i think you wrote more than me!! i love this, im gonna put my response under a cut im not being super obnoxious on the dash.

i get that the mayfly stage would be not as visually stimulating for people and usually i would count myself in with that crowd because i love a good spectacle but i think because i watched the spark stage first and my colour perception is sometimes weird so when there's a lot of movement with very little colour variation my tiny pea brain loses track of whats happening really quickly. especially with red. so it was kind of difficult for me to pay attention to the spark stage in the second half. also i absolutely HATE watching people flub on stage because it brings up such visceral secondhand feelings that i couldn't even watch the stage when i started the full episode today.

i love a good suit but you know what i would also love: sf9 in more costume variations. tbh im just getting nitpicky about it because im a costume designer down to the core and i got trained by a designer who specialized in doing avant garde costuming so i tend to skew more towards wild than reserved. it looks like the move stage wont be be suits so ill take it, but oh man to do i want to see some really crazy stuff. which i know they'll never do because idols have to be pretty at all times or the fans get mad but oh i want it so badly.

do you mean how i would improve ikon's backup dancers outfits or lisa's? here why dont i do both. for lisa's dancers i would have just done away with that harness shape all together, its almost exclusively a military style. the jackets by themselves would have been fine but really what they should have done was put them in something that matched the gold but contrasted enough to give them shape. by having at least her dancers in all black on a gold stage there was a lot of "haha look at me do a duck walk because lets throw in some voguing for spice." they could have gone with a mesh bodysuit idea similar to what she was wearing or even just different colour coats. as for ikon's backup dancers, firstly pants. not black. or even a longer skirt. genuinely a part of the reason why i dont watch girl group content is because i HATE the hem length of the shorts they make everyone wear. words cannot describe how much i hate that cut. kpop is so obsessed with showing off women's bodies and especially their legs but they do it in the LEAST flattering way possible because it "can't be too risqué," just shoot me now. i hate it. i hate it so fucking much. yea yea everybody was on cocaine in the 80s whatever but at least they were all wearing french cut bodysuits so their legs looked fantastic. stop interrupting the lines!! anyways. pants so the only section of skin showing is thigh to mid calf, especially because they weren't even doing any fun legwork! if they really wanted to keep the full sleeve bodysuits they shout have done them in a fabric with a texture or external embellishments, like a patent/vinyl or sequins/rhinestones. something to catch the stage lights so we can actually see the shape of the limb. but the easiest way to fix it is literally just cut the arms off the bodysuits. stages are lit to show off skin, sometimes the best way to have something be seen is just to have it bare.

i agreed skz cycles through ideas way too fast, they need to just pick a couple and stick them out through the stage instead of just adding more and more different ones throughout. also ok good someone else noticed that there is just...so much changbin. we don't need that much changbin. i know there's other boys in the group let them do something! also im pretty sure theyre not recreating the cat knife meme but actually the promo image from john wick chapter two, which i also could have sworn i saw a deadpool version of as an instagram ad back when movies were happening, but now that im looking for it it doesn't exist so i might be crazy.

im excited for the move stage but im also trepidatious because...its move. i have NO clue what the concept is from the previews so i just hope its weird enough to take it enough out of the taemin context for me to enjoy it.

[tribill-hexaclintonium]

Candy Theif

A quirk, thats what most people would call it. She figures its more of a comfort thing.

About once a month y/n got a bag of blow pops and put them in a little jar in her room. She'd eat one when ever she was sad, just to cheer her up a little. Even though the gum had a weird texture, the taste was comforting. Thats all she really needed.

Y/n cant remember when, but one day the blue lollipops started to go missing. No big deal, everyone knows the strawberry ones are better. Not very long after the green ones started to go missing, she started to wonder who was taking them. It could be Tony, he tends to steal her food and candy isnt far from that field.

As it was the beginning of the month, she went to the store to get more suckers. Hopefully this month she could have at least one blue candy before they were taken. Maybe the place has mice, she thought.

It wasnt until she came back to find Bucky enjoying a blow pop in the living room that she realized it wasnt Tony at all.

"James"

He stoped abruptly throwing whatever he had in his hands to the opposite side of the couch. He looked wide eyed in her direction.

"Is that mine?" She asked nodding to the candy.

"Thats an interesting question because actually I found it just- " She let him stutter on for a while before she shook her head, pushing off the doorway she was leaning against.

"James"

"Dont call me that, youre reminding me of my mom" he groaned. She punched his arm playfully.

"You could have just asked."

He stayed silent and stood up from the couch. He headed to throw the sucker away before she caught his wrist.

"Well dont waste it, you asshole" She pushed his hand tward his chest.

"Dont take all of the blue ones next time, it says a lot about your character."

"Really, what does it say?" He laughs putting it back in his mouth. She paused looking for an answer.

"Alright you got me there, I have no idea. Its just a vibe I get from blue rasberry people."

"Darn, I really wanted to know." He jokes throwing himself back on the couch. She sat back down pulling her own candy out of the newly bought bag and unwrapped it.

"You guys had candy back in the 40's right?" He turned, almost asking if he had heard correctly.

"It was 1940 not 1801 dumbass."

"Ok so what? Did you have candy or not dickwad?"

"Yes, jesus." She laughed at his frustration and decided to push further.

"Ok so what kind did you like then?"

"Its not the same as this, I mean, the stuff I got was either crappy gum or weird chalky buttons."

"So no blow pops in the 40s, good to know grandpa."

"Dont call me that either, we had lollipops but not this stuff." Now he really sounded like her grandpa.

"So have you always liked this 'stuff' oh dear grandfather of mine" She batted her eyelashes for emphasis.

"Have I always liked candy?" He paused.

"Yeah I mean who doesnt?" He shrugged, throwing the clean stick into the trashcan, he missed but she wasnt going to say anything about it.

"Did the stuff back then dye your lips like it does now?" She asked a little more confidently. A little flirting never hurt anyone.

"Yeah we, uh, used a lot of chemicals back-" He didnt bother to finish before he looked back at her. She raised her eyebrows and shrugged. He smiled a little.

"You cheeky bastard."

"Hey, you stole my candy I had nothing to do with this grandpa." He leans back and crosses his arms.

"I dont owe you shit."

"I agree" She said shifting to sit cross legged.

"You take my stuff too, you know." He said, thats true. Its not her fault he leaves his shirts out where technically anyone could take them.

"Well let me take this opportunity to apologize." She said with a mischievous smile.

"Thank you, Im sure its difficult for you to say youre in the wrong." He said, he was more smug than she could stand.

"Yeah, I should have known better. I read somewhere the elderly get very attached to personal items." She says holding back a laugh. He turns to her frustrated beyond belief.

"I could strange you right now, you know."

"Ah is that a carry over from the great depression?" She started to walk to her room.

"Im keeping the new bag asshole!" He yelled after her. She flipped him off and continued on her way.

[hashtagartistlife]

Maybe fate was called fate because some things weren’t choices; some things were simply written into his DNA, woven into the very fabric of the universe. World orders. The sky is blue. The sun is hot. He is in love with Kuchiki Rukia.

Kuchiki Rukia is dying.  

Ten years after the defeat of Yhwach, it’s time Ichigo and Rukia started facing some truths— about the world, about themselves, and about each other. 

this is all i have of this fic for now (this and a tiny little bit of chapter 3), i guess it’ll be updated when i woman the fuck up and wrack up enough nerves to keep writing which im hoping will be sometime this decade :’/ but i might post chapters i have for other unfinished fics i have over the next few days so if you’re into unfinished fics (read: literally nobody) then stick around!!! 

premise for this fic | chapter 1 here | this is chapter 2

________________________________________________________________

f r a y

by hashtagartistlife

________________________________________________________________

Two 

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9:12 am 

Kurosaki Clinic

When Renji wakes up the next morning to find Rukia safely asleep beside him, he feels the tension across his shoulders ease somewhat. They’d both been a little worried about how her sleepwalking habit might fit into this visit (even though neither of them had voiced their concerns out loud), he more so than she for reasons he had yet to disclose to her. Her breathy sigh of ‘Ichigo?’ rings in his ears. He hadn’t seen a point in telling Rukia about that, not when she was still refusing to admit she had a problem in the first place. She’d just feel needlessly guilty and isolate herself even more. Renji knows how Rukia works. What he doesn’t know is how to break through that shell she builds around herself, how to draw her out of it and get her to face her problems head-on. 

No, he admits (and he’d be lying if he said there wasn’t a trace of bitterness in the way he thought it), that’s always been Ichigo’s specialty. He looks across the rowdy breakfast table to his friend, who is sitting uncharacteristically silent with a mug of something dark and unappetising in his hands. His eyes are shadowed, tired, and when he meets Renji’s gaze he starts almost guiltily before curving his lips into an uneasy smile. 

The hell’s all that about? Renji thinks, but then Ichika slams into his knee, shoving a glass of orange juice into his face, and he puts the moment out of his mind. The rest of the morning is filled with trying out some godawful beverage called ‘coffee’ at Orihime’s behest, wrangling Ichika into human world clothes, and sending the children off, along with their mothers, to go meet Sado. He and Ichigo stay back, Ichigo to tend to his clinic and he to go see Urahara. Since gensei visits were so few and far between, even on what was ostensibly a holiday they had been saddled with checking in on the shopkeeper to exchange news and technology. Renji figures he might as well get that out of the way first, and catch up with Sado later. 

At least, he figures that until Ichigo corners him just before he walks out the door, a dark expression on his face. He looks uncomfortable, standing in the doorway of his own house, a hand on the back of his neck, and Renji notes with a kind of detached surprise that if Ichigo hadn’t been slumping, they’d be more or less at a height now. He raises an eyebrow at him in a silent question. 

“A— about Rukia—” Ichigo stumbles over the syllables in her name, and stops, wetting his lips, looking nervous. A sense of foreboding settles into Renji’s gut; Ichigo hasn’t looked this worried in— well, a decade. He stays quiet, letting Ichigo finish his question. “Has she ever— has she ever sleepwalked before?”

He freezes in his tracks; frantically, Renji rewinds last night in his mind. It’s no use; he’d been out for the count for a solid eight hours. If he hadn’t been so tired lately, he’d have thought someone had spiked his drink. Try as he might, he can’t remember Rukia slipping out of bed at all. But she’d been back in bed by the morning, so someone must have intercepted her—

Ichigo. Rukia’s voice, ghostly in his mind, calling his name. Ichigo. Ichigo. Ichigo—

His breath leaves him in a long, long sigh, and Renji closes his eyes before gesturing for Ichigo to sit. 

. 

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6:53 am

Ichigo doesn’t go back to his bed after the kiss. Instead he sits outside the clinic, on the cold hard asphalt, for one eternity— two— til the sun starts lightening the end of the street and the moon grows paler in the sky. He can still feel Rukia on his skin, in his veins, lingering like a drug that refuses to clear. He doesn’t know if he’ll ever be empty of her touch now that he’s known it. 

When the moon finally disappears and the sun well and truly risen, he picks himself up from the ground and stumbles back into the house, feeling like he was the sleepwalker now. The sight of their children sprawled out together in their blanket fort brings the reality of what he’s done rushing back to him. He can’t help the reflex that brings his fingers up to ghost over his lips, like a lovesick teenager. The breath leaves his lungs like he’s been punched, and he turns away from the kids, sleeping angelically side-by-side. He can’t bear the thought of facing either of them, of facing anyone in this household any more. 

What does he do now? Does he go back to bed, pretend nothing ever happened— slip into his place beside Orihime and forget the fact that his heart is beating again for the first time in ten years? Does he come clean to her and beg forgiveness, tell her he loves her and it won’t ever happen again, or does he lock this away in a dark recess of his mind, just like he’s done with his shinigami powers and everything related to her for the last decade? His mind casts around frantically for excuses — he was tired. It was the middle of the night. Hell, he doesn’t even know if it really happened anymore — was everything a fever dream, triggered by the immense relief of seeing Rukia again? But his blood is thrumming in his veins, and the power he’d spent his entire adult life crushing down is once again swirling and eddying just under his skin, exactly like it had when he was seventeen. His hands are shaking, and his skin feels hot. He can’t lie to himself. Rukia was here. Rukia’d kissed him. He’d kissed her back. 

He drags his trembling hands over his eyes, down his face; slumps into a chair in the kitchen and attempts to evade the question that becomes more pressing with every second. What now? It was clear that Rukia had no idea what had happened. The weight of this transgression was his alone to carry. Even if she had remembered, the fault lay with him— she’d been asleep, but he’d been wide awake and had pulled her towards him. 

A part of him— the good part, the noble part, the part that had once forced its way through layers of hollow to tell his zanpakutou to fuck off out of his fight with Byakuya— is yelling at him to confess, to lay himself at Orihime’s mercy and take whatever comes from it. But a larger, more insistent part of him is asking, for what? What does telling Orihime accomplish, but the breaking of four hearts? He has never deserved Orihime, with her soft smiles and kind words to his rough edges; the fact that he is, once again, an awful person to her— for her— is not news. What is the point of ruining her spun-sugar smile with something that will never happen again—

liar

—especially when it doesn’t just involve him? If he confesses, it’s not just his head on the line; it’s Rukia’s, too, no matter the fact that she was asleep at the time. And he might be willing to risk everything he ever is or was for far less than this, but there is no way in hell he will do that to Rukia. Not for some one-off sleepwalking incident that she had no control over, and if it happens again he’ll just push her away—

liar

— and oh, god, was this a thing that happened often? Rukia’d always been a deep sleeper; she was, despite everything she insisted to the contrary, very clearly not okay if she was sleepwalking like this. 

As his thoughts spiral back to the cause of his turmoil, Ichigo becomes acutely aware of her reiatsu upstairs, thrumming rapidly like a hummingbird’s wings. It seems lighter and more unsettled than he remembers it being, and the tinge of instability to it as it flares and retreats irregularly unnerves him. Rukia’s reiatsu control has always been top-class, so this distinct lack of it triggers alarm bells in his mind. He swallows, and attempts to smooth down the ragged edges of her power with his; but wherever his reiatsu brushes against hers, it just flares brighter and more powerful and he has to give up, lest it disturb Renji or the kids.

It's been a while since he's felt someone else’s reiatsu like this, but he knows this isn't normal; concern eats at him even as it wars with an urge to ignore it and bury everything about this incident as deep as possible. Rukia isn’t an idiot, she would have gotten help if it was something serious—but would she, really? He knows better than anyone how stubborn she can be when she thinks she’s being a burden. She’d die before she let someone else take the fall for her. 

He closes his eyes. 

He scowls; ten years it’s been, and she’s still so— so— so her. Longer hair, a husband and child, a Captain’s haori, and nothing matters; she’s still stubborn, still a bitch who lives to help everyone else but won’t let anyone help her. It's evident in the way she refuses to say she’s tired, the way that Renji’s eyes follow her around everywhere, worried. She’s still the self-sacrificing idiot she’d been from day one, and he—

He is still the coward he’d been twelve years ago, when he’d watched her bleed out on the concrete before him and only then been spurred into action. 

This isn’t about him. If Rukia is ill, then he has to let someone know— someone who can actually do something about it. His feelings — whatever they are— does not factor into the equation. This is about Rukia—

— so, he needs to talk to Renji. 

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10:18 am

“Has Rukia ever sleepwalked before?”

A moment of tension across Renji’s features, and then a long, long sigh; he gestures for Ichigo to sit, and the two of them shuffle over to the recently vacated kitchen table. Renji rubs his face tiredly, and Ichigo’s sense of foreboding grows. 

“... Last night, huh?” Renji says, and Ichigo almost jumps out of his skin; did he know? Could he see— was the mark of Rukia's lips on his visible, indelible, the way it felt like to him? Could everyone read it on his face, that he and Rukia—

Renji’s voice is weary as he continues. “Yeah. Yeah, she's sleepwalked before. The past few years, actually. What did she do last night? How did you find her?”

— kissed—  “She— she walked out of the clinic and I heard the door open. Renji, is she— is she okay—”

Renji leans his elbows on the table and buries his face in his hands. “I don't know,” he breathes, frustration dripping from every syllable. “I don't know, she won't tell me, you know how she is—”

Did he ever. Ichigo remembers with vivid clarity the time she'd sustained a stomach wound, back in the days before Soul Society; she hadn’t told him for three days, and had only agreed to go see Urahara when she'd finally collapsed in his arms. 

“ — don't think I've tried—? God, doctors, healers, we've tried everything, Kuchiki-Taichou’s worried out of his mind. But she won't have any of it, says she won't let us waste time fussing over her when there are better things to worry about—”

“That fucking idiot,” Ichigo mutters, and Renji barks out what is almost a laugh. 

“Right? Drives me up the fucking wall. Wouldn't be Rukia if she didn't.”

“Guess not.”

Renji cracks a strained smile before it fades away into seriousness again. “It wasn't this bad before,” he says, and Ichigo sits up straight. 

“Recent thing, then?”

“Depends what you'd classify as recent. I mean, she's never been a heavy sleeper—”

At this, Ichigo interrupts. “Wait, really? She's always slept like the dead—” 

Renji gives him a look, and Ichigo remembers who it is that is sharing her bed now. He shuts up. 

“ — as I said, she's never slept too well, even during our Rukon days, and it got pretty bad after the war, but it wasn't— wasn’t to this extent, you know? At least, not till she had Ichika. And then— it was like a switch flipped. She couldn't get to sleep at night, and she could barely keep her eyes open during the day. It started interfering with her work, and you know how that would have killed her; we started to go see a bunch of people for it but nothing seemed to help. And then she started sleepwalking—”

Something cold crawls up Ichigo’s spine.

“She— at first, we didn't know where it was that she was going in her sleep. she wandered the Kuchiki Manor gardens a lot, sometimes she just paced around inside the house. Sometimes she got out of the Kuchiki property and was well into the streets before we found her and brought her back. I didn't know where she was trying to go—” 

Renji breaks off, and looks Ichigo dead in the eye. 

“— till one morning I woke up, and found her at Sokyouku Hill.” 

Ichigo’s blood turns to ice. 

“It was bloody Sokyoku Hill, Ichigo. Every single time— inside the Manor, in the gardens, on the streets. She was always trying to get to Sokyouku Hill. North-north west from the Kuchiki Manor. I—”

Renji’s expression turns supplicating, as if asking him for an answer, but Ichigo has none to give; he’s rooted to the spot by the sheer horror he’s feeling, Rukia strung up against the Sokyouku vivid in his mind. That collar around her neck, a red slash splitting her throat open; her eyes, glazed over with tears. Her skin dyed orange and yellow from the heat of it all. 

“I don’t know what’s wrong with her, Ichigo, for fuck’s sake I can’t even get her to admit that there’s something wrong. I just—” 

Renji drops his head into his hands. Very softly — so soft that Ichigo is sure he isn’t meant to hear these next words— he says to himself: 

“Ten years. Ten years, and I’m still not enough.” 

Ten years. Enough to fell mountains; enough to dry rivers and move oceans. 

Not enough to change a heart. 

When Renji looks up at Ichigo again, his gaze is edged with steel. 

“She says your name.” 

“I— what?” 

“She says your name, when she walks out to Sokyouku Hill. She says your name.” 

A memory, in his mind: Rukia, ethereal in the moonlight. Ichigo? 

Yeah. Yeah, it’s me. I’m here. 

Ichigo doesn’t know what to say. 

Eventually, Renji breaks their impasse; he sighs and raps the table before getting up. “I’m not such a small man as to beat you to a pulp over that, Ichigo, stop looking like you think I’m going to bite your head off.” 

“I’m not—” he protests automatically, but Renji shushes him with a wave of his hand. 

“You are, but that’s not the point.” He ambles over to the door and looks over his shoulder at him, one hand poised on the handle. “If— if there’s anything you might be able to do for her—” 

“Renji—”

“Please,” Renji says, and even though this time, he isn’t on his knees half-dead before him, Ichigo knows what it’s costing him to make this request. “Please… help her.” 

Of course, Ichigo wants to reply, She’ll be fine, I’ll save her. Rukia’ll be safe—

But he isn’t fifteen anymore. 

“I’ll— try,” he says, lamely, and that is the best they can do. Renji nods. 

“Gonna go see Urahara. He might have some tricks up his sleeve,” he says, but he doesn’t look like he believes what he’s saying. Ichigo waves him off, and Renji slips away.

The sound of the clinic door swinging shut echoes in his wake. 

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3:02 pm

Rrrrrrrrrrrrrr.

Click.

“...Hello?”

“Kurosaki-san?”

“...... Urahara-san?”

“Ah, Kurosaki-san, thank goodness you picked up. If you aren’t busy, I’d appreciate your presence at the Shoten as soon as possible.” 

“What? Me? Why?”

A pause; Ichigo finds, for no good reason whatsoever, that he is holding his breath.

“Ah, well. You see, that is—”

Between one accelerating heartbeat and the next—

“Kuchiki-san has collapsed.” 

[captain-jinguji]

Helloo pls don't judge me but I need a yandere Ai for my life sjhshs so can I request the whole alphabet for him? Thanks luv you and keep it up

BABE I DONT JUDGE OKAY I LOVE YOU AND I TRIED MY BEST AT THIS (I am not the best at his character ngl ) ❤❤❤ hope you're doing well

AI MIKAZE YANDERE ALPHABET

Affection: How do they show their love and affection? How intense would it get?

He's very… monotone in his love. He rarely says it verbally and usually turns to soft touches. Mainly because hes still unsure himself oh how this is supposed to work but by God dont think that's a weakness. His grip does tend to tighten. 

Blood: How messy are they willing to get when it comes to their darling?

Much like Masato, he ruins their life without taking it. Im talking about exploiting their deepest darkest secrets, absolutely humiliating them in front of everyone that knows them hes like anonymous, but worse. 

Cruelty: How would they treat their darling once abducted? Would they mock them?

He doesnt mock them but he studies them which may or may not be worse. To have someone watch you break down and lose it, completely emotionless; analyzing you as your form becomes weaker and weaker is so much worse than a punch to the face. 

Darling: Aside from abduction, would they do anything against their darling’s will?

Eh. He puts them in uncomfortable situations to study their reaction. It can go from anywhere to calling a ~bigger~ person pregnant looking, to going on the dark web and watching someone commit cannibalism. 

Exposed: How much of their heart do they bare to their darling? How vulnerable are they when it comes to their darling?

He unknowingly entrusts then with a lot of it mainly because he wants his darling to explain to him why he's feeling this way. Why his heart aches to be with them under any circumstances. 

Fight: How would they feel if their darling fought back?

He'd have a very rationally laid out answer for this type of reaction. May it be the lack of freedom of constant staring of his; its okay. He forgives them. 

Game: Is this a game to them? How much would they enjoy watching their darling try to escape?

This is not a game but rather a sick science experiment. Go ahead, try to escape, but there's literal traps all around the house and without his helping hand to guide them past them, theyre are sure to hurt themselves. 

Hell: What would be their darling’s worst experience with them?

As mentioned above, he has literal traps around the house. From tripping over invisible string to being magnet cuffed to the wall. Their worst experience, however, has to have been when they found a "secret" door, (which wasn't actually there, he put it there) and opened it only to have water pour on them and getting electrocuted. Now if you didnt know, water and electricity dont mix. Especially not on a human. 

Ideals: What kind of future do they have in mind for/with their darling?

He wants to keep them with him of course. But more as a pet. A science experiment that bends to his every will. 

Jealousy: Do they get jealous? Do they lash out or find a way to cope?

He doesnt get jealous. He gets deadly. If someone tried to touch his darling or "save" them, he would W R E C K them in the worst way possible. Rationally, of course. All his steps are calculated and they would never catch him. 

Kisses: How do they act around or with their darling?

He acts relatively normal. Emotionless, stoic, smart. But he loves to just, well, love them. He likes to curl up against them or put them in his lap and run his fingers through their hair, whispering sweet words that they knew, ultimately, meant nothing. 

Love letters: How would they go about courting or approaching their darling?

Its a curiosity game. He's curious about them and they try to find out why he's the way he is. Why so blank? So monotone? It's quite fun to watch them figure him out while he already several files on them. 

Mask: Are their true colors drastically different from the way they act around everyone else?

No. Much like he told Syo and Natsuki, theyre a test subject and he made that very clear from the beginning on, to everyone. 

Naughty: How would they punish their darling?

Traps, testing the limits of the human body, you know? Hypothermia? How long til it kicks in? Could you withstand the boiling point of skin if he just gradually turns up the heat? Of course hed never kill you. Just… observe the process. 

Oppression: How many rights would they take away from their darling?

They dont have any rights outside of him. They rely on him for everything from clothing to food and water, to walks in the park. Everything is determined and up to him. 

Patience: How patient are they with their darling?

He actually has a decent amount of patience because, again. Experiment. He wants to know why they're feeling this way and makes them talk about every last out and episode. 

Quit: If their darling dies, leaves, or successfully escapes, would they ever be able to move on?

Quite honestly, that depends on the natural personality of his darling. If they're kind and compassionate, almost like a mother, he would feel all kinds of sad emotions, maybe even overheat and "die". If they're constantly defiant and just annoying to deal with one way or another, he can find himself a new darling. 

Regret: Would they ever feel guilty about abducting their darling? Would they ever let their darling go?

No. He might have felt a ping of guilt once or twice but if his darling didn't catch that, they missed all their opportunity. 

Stigma: What brought about this side of them (childhood, curiosity, etc)?

Mainly the confusion about emotions in general. No one told him that feeling this strong toward someone was not, well, normal, but toxic. Suffocating. Deadly. Everyone just told him he was in love. Who knew love could be so killer? 

Tears: How do they feel about seeing their darling scream, cry, and/or isolate themselves?

Indifferent. He'd take comfort them to get information out of them. Some times though he actually does hurt for them, mainly if it wasnt his fault though. Which is rarely the case. 

Unique: Would they do anything different from the classic yandere?

This is literally an experiment to him. Its not true obsession, but a kid who takes it way too far, ya know? 

Vice: What weakness can their darling exploit in order to escape?

Since he is very confused about his emotions, as mentioned above, if you catch him in a vulnerable state and kind of step on his emotions a bit, you might be able to distract him. Emphasis on might. 

Wit’s end: Would they ever hurt their darling?

Oh yes, mainly to see their reactions and it's not as extreme as others. He would never beat them, cut them, or feed them to the wolves. Just… testing their limits in other ways.

Xoanon: How much would they revere or worship their darling? To what length would they go to win their darling over?

Its so bittersweet that after every bad thing, he holds his darling tight and tells them how proud he is of them, how much he "LOVES" them, knowing damn well that he has no clue what love is and this is just unhealthy behavior. 

Yearn: How long do they pine after their darling before they snap?

He calls it observing rather than pining lol but he can go on for ages or at least until his darling shows interest in him, too. Thats when he strikes.

Zenith: Would they ever break their darling? 

Yes and hes in the process of that. Taking away their rights is only the first step of forming an obedient pet .