#and like I'm never going to have a happy or fulfilling life
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theladygazingatemptiness · 12 days ago
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#wak#negative /#tag vent /#man.. why is everything so draining#like.. fr it seems like I can't do Anything for an extended amount of time without burning out and wanting to quit#like. when I was little it was my absolute dream to be able to do nothing but draw all day every day but#now as an adult the thought of it stresses me out and makes me sick to my stomach#I used to get so excited about getting commissions but#now every time I see that someone's commissioned me I just dread doing it as if it's something I'm getting graded for in two days#(note that this isn't a slight against people who've commed me by any means. if you've commed me you're a saint)#(but. that's just how I feel and I wish it wasn't)#which is why comms are closed rn and idk when I'm opening them back up#rn I'm doing commission-based editing/proofreading work for a small publishing comp#something that I Also once aspired to do full-time#but.. I'm already kinda getting tired of it? probably bc my current project is 140+ pages that I have to get done in two weeks#like.. it's not Bad and I'm not quitting (I don't have a choice anyway. this is the closest thing I have rn to a consistent-ish job)#but it.. just gets less fun w every manuscript and I hate that#and like... whenever I go out no matter where I am I just want to go back home#I have no 'dream job' anymore. I have no goals. I don't want to go places or do things I just want to be home sleeping#but. as we all know that's not an option in the capitalist hellscape we live in#hell... even if we Didn't live in the hellscape it probably still wouldn't be an option lol#and of course my mom will not hear any of it and just thinks I'm being spoiled and lazy and 'using my aut as an excuse'#and most people including supposed '''''leftists'''' would probably agree with her too#bc 95% of '''"radical communists''''' on here are Adults Aren't Allowed To Exist Outside Of Working And That's How Things Should Be truther#who vocally treat unemployment as a moral failing and as a Bad Person Trait™ inbetween making Capitalism Bad posts#but I'm getting offtopic. Maybe I Am Useless And Lazy And A Leech Or Etc#but what I'm trying to say is I feel like I'm going to be miserable and feel like just a machine no matter what I do#and like I'm never going to have a happy or fulfilling life#and that my only option is to go to sleep never wake up and hope I'm reborn with no mental illnesses or trauma and into a rich family#but.. fat chance.
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lunarharp · 10 months ago
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wip thing...
of my bg3 avatar hellebore. i also did some casual nude studies of my 3 characters which i'll put under a cut... rather unlike me after all. (so WARNING for abrupt non-sexual full Artistic nudity lol...,,,,) (< won't be making a habit of this)
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they mean the world to me
#bg3 spoilers#?? idk. gith look so..Emaciated. And long. i guess we don't eat on the astral plane :) anyway..well..too much to say.....#it is very very very depressing having to live in the Real World after that final playthrough meant so very much to me.#i normally feel Hope & suchlike after finishing a highly immersive emotional game..but it's too hard this time and it hurtsssss lol yippee#i appreciate bg3 very much for being a place where i could access the concept of nudity & such like in a way that finally felt comfortable.#bodies are inherently non-sexual. they just Are a Fact of Life. this game being NORMAL about nudity from the character creation screen#makes it possible for someone like me to actually have a chance at accessing sensuality in a way that feels comfortable from there.#dont feel like putting it into words further. im ace. just very grateful to this game. even despite the horrors i will never ever forget it#augoh..gugf.. want to go back. my friends & love are in there.....i'm supposed to just move on? in the real world??? THIS place???? UHH????#my characters canonically look like that too!! i see them as intersex and not so much trans. They just look that way.#Diversity win!!! the people who enacted horrors upon you and are trying to kill you again respect your pronouns!!!! <3#I FAILED HONOUR MODE IN THE STUPIDEST WAY POSSIBLE..ACCIDENTALLY TOUCHED AN ITEM. MY LOVER TOUCHED SOME BLOOD-TOUCHED RAG ITEM @ THE CRECHE#AND MY PEOPLE MASSACRED US... YOU BELOVED PRAT. OF COURSE IT WOULD BE YOU AND IN THIS WAY#grateful for love triangle chaos...INTENSE EX DRAMA... IT HAD MAJOR REPURCUSSIONS THIS TIME...ohh so very much happened ohh my dear#truly don't know how to face the Real World now for real. I Don't Know. something has snapped. ive realised twt just makes me feel sad lol#if something in my spare time isn't at least half as fun as bg3....like.. it's not good enough. god we only have one wild and precious life#being Online makes me feel a loneliness so wretched and painful and horrible i really don't think this is the answer.#Why did you even start drawing in the first place? Why did you start this?#For real..the need to work this out and decide what on earth i'm going to do now has presented itself. Why try to get better..why be online#someone who has an imagination that can keep them so happy and fulfilled...has no business also feeling a loneliness as profound as this.#why was someone THIS introverted and withdrawn and anxious also cursed with such a restlessness?#What are you going to DO now? because hellebore and their lover are fine....... So what about you...?#hellebore..😭😭 AUUGHH!! I JUST WANT TO GO TO MY BED IN THE INN...PLAY ON MY VIOLIN THAT'S WHAT I'D DO!!!! i'd drink some ALE DAMNIT!!!!!#i was rereading My Lesbian Experience With Loneliness- the only time i've seen this level of emotional isolation depicted-and was grateful.#but then i read her latest book and now she has a debilitating substance abuse situation and it's upsetting.#I hope she finds what she was looking for. I hope we all make it. kind of wild that i dont do such major self-sabotage at this point myself#I truly think anyone who manages to find dear friends and achieve fulfillment and happiness with others outside themselves are amazing.#I see it happen from my tower. i hope we all make it. I hope we can make it through everything to come.#Why did i say all this on drawings of my characters naked. ah who even cares any more......
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ashtcnirwin · 2 months ago
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#it never fails to bemuse me how some people in my life (mainly coworkers i'm not at all close with) will try to tell me that i--#--NEED to have kids and that i'll regret it one day if i DON'T have kids cos doing so is such an enrichment to one's life#and then five seconds later they'll complain about all the ways in which their kids have affected or are affecting their lives negatively#''my house is always messy and my marriage is more of a roommate arrangement than anything else and all my extra income--#--goes towards my kids aka i never have anything to spend on myself and my kid's behavioral issues are crippling the entire household--#--and i can't laugh without peeing and dinner is a daily battle cos my kid will only eat hot dogs and i haven't gone on a vacation that--#--didn't involve a waterslide and/or a petting zoo for nine years and i can't rmbr the last time i had more than five minutes to myself--#--and my entire identity and all my hobbies went out the window when i had children but....it's so rewarding and i highly rec:)))''#like.....it's not that i doubt that if i had a kid i'd love it and be prepared to die to protect it but why the actual fuck would i want to#--enrich my life by having one when the way you're talking is making it sound like doing so would come at the expense of pretty--#much everything that currently brings happiness and fulfillment to my life?!#s/o to the coworker who (drunkenly) went ''i love my kids more than anything else in the whole fucking world but idk if i'd have them if--#--i could go back and choose again'' at a party this summer tho. that one felt more tied to a reality i can comprehend lmao
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tvrningout · 1 year ago
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y'all remember when i said maybe cyrillo dies?? i take it back. he's faking his death and retiring to some village by the sea bc i said so uvu
#and actually i think that would be a more fulfilling end to his story for both cyrillo and readers#bc his thing is that he pretty much is living to help others and doesn't give himself that same care#he doesn't neglect his health or anything but the dude never goes on vacation#he throws himself into war when he swore he'd never do that again but it's like!! someone's gotta help the free army!!#so i really like the idea that maybe there's a situation in which it /appears/ cyrillo died#but nah he lived and he retired and became a no one like he was before everything happened#and he's happy he's finally living for himself and taking advantage of his second chance at life /for himself/#for both cyrillo and rin i think a big character-defining trait of theirs is that despite what they've been through and will go through#they love life they love the world they're in they love people and so i think both of them are gonna have that choice#go rest or go back to work#and workaholic cyrillo chooses rest in the form of disappearing to a lil village#and rogue rin goes back to work bc she can't help it. she can't deny that people need her#and hers is a lil more serious bc sunna is like 'i don't gotta resurrect you again. you could die and be reborn anew'#but no rin loves her life despite everything. she's not ready to go yet#AAAHHH SORRY FOR THE RAMBLING I'M :' ))))))#i wanna try to write a lil more before bed so let me stop asdfg#headcanons | dórverold#headcanons | cyrillo#i don't wanna lose this just in case bc of the tags uvu
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aefensteorrra · 2 years ago
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skrunksthatwunk · 1 year ago
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not rascal's deadbeat owner coming around when im not home and telling my roommate she's taking him for a week (our break is 4 weeks or so, implying he's gonna be back here even though That's Her Cat Not Ours) and then just picking up the new toys i bought for him and taking them with her without even asking. hey. hi. those are mine
#like yes i want rascal to use them so he can be happy and fulfilled but also i dont fucking trust you#she didnt even ask. i wasnt even AROUND and she just yoinked them#she also took the new litter box my roomie got for him bc the old one was so caked in shit that 20 mins in a powerful sink didnt even#change it. like bedrock-hard cat shit. who fucking knows how old that was bc they never clean or empty it. fucks sake#and obv he needs a litter box and my roomie threw the old one away bc again it was Unsalvageably And Hazardously Filthy#like we could get sick he could get sick. get a grip#but like i dont wanna be feeding her replacements for her stuff she doesn't take care of over and over#just burning money trying to make rascal's life a Little better bc again our control over his situation is limited bc hes literally her cat#it's so frustrating. like i waited a full month to get him new toys bc i didn't know how long this situation was gonna last and i dont have#cats and cant have them for a while (not that this is stopping me oops) so it's not like the toys'll be used w me#like if she decided to up and drop him at a shelter like she'd planned less than a couple months ago I'd be sittjng in a pile of cat stuff#but he needs more stuff yknow. theyre not providing for him and i have the means to atm. and just when i bite the bullet and surprise him#with a bunch of new things he was SO excited about she swoops in without warning and takes him#god. my roommate told me he just froze up when his owner came in..and he looked so pissed about it#having to go back and leave us and leave all his fun new stuff to go back to the room where they cant even bother to feed him regularly#much less play with him or take care of him#it's heartbreaking. it's such a delicate situation im trying to move carefully so we don't lose him completely but it's so frustrating going#slow. ughhghhgh AND THEYRE ALWAYS LIKE man he's so much nicer to y'all. MAYBE IT'S BC WE TREAT HIM WELL. CRAZY THOUGHT I KNOW#fucking. i love that little man this sucks for him so bad. trying to get him back for a couple days while im here but no response yet#and my roommate's staying on campus over break so she's gonna show up as soon as that week's over like I'm Here For Rascal. Your Time Is Up.#rauguhhhhh sorry if these rascal vent posts are a downer guys. it's just. god dude. fucking hell#i know this is a stupid situation i have gotten myself into i know it's stupid to try and finagle someone's pet from them BUT SHES ABUSIVE#AND SUPER LIKE. INDIFFERENT?? AND APATHETIC ABOUT WHETHER OR NOT THE PPL SHE DUMPS HIM ON CARE FOR HIM WELL OR NOT. AGH#sighhhh. whatever. gotta focus on tmr's exam and then i can complain about rascal some more.#i get she prolly thinks it's a team effort but the only reason we take her stuff is bc we didn't have a cat and werent planning on it#ggggghhzgzzjzjkkzkzkkzkk. grinding my teeth
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miserye · 1 year ago
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never would i have thought in a million years that i would get close enough to my boss that he would ask me to house sit for him
#chatterye#this is not incredibly uncommon in our dpt#i would like to stress this#but for me? insane#i think i was chose via process of elimination because i a. have no life (least likely to party out of everyone) and b. don't talk#which are both good for this endeavor#the way i asked no questions i was just like if you can get me there and back sure#whatever you want bossman idc#it was actually so funny but so awkward because we are the most awk ppl ever#n e ways that what i'm doing tmr and maybe seeing some dogs w someone else but isn't that crazy#that someone would get to know me and then trust me enough to sit in their house for them LMFAOOOOO#i'm lwky excited to see his house because like . that is so weird and foreign to me#i'm actually going to bet that he keeps his shoes on in the house i can feel it in my bones i hope not but i bet you#the fact that he literally went on a small hour long trip w me where i practically did not speak and then#went on to see me ditch him for 30 mins during work to grab coffee w my coworker the next day and still decided to ask me LMFAOOOOO#sorry i'm saying so much this is just so funny and surreal to me#now he has to write me the best rec letter of my life and of his career#you'll def see a nervous live tweeting here tmr while i'm over there#also i had the most fulfilling ubereats order in a while and it made me happy#i will never get ppl who don't enjoy burgers you're not better than the rest of us i promise#also i got their deep fried oreos for free and when i tell you those mfs were gas oh my god
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loumauve · 2 years ago
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#sometimes I wish there was like a guide or sth to dealing with intimacy when you're ace#not just in relationships but also in relationships#bc sometimes I think back to conversations I've had with non-ace folks in the past#and usually they would come down to sth like 'when you know you know'#or 'there's gonna be this look and you'll know it's the right moment'#which all seems fake af and untrue and entirely un-applicable if you've agreed to sth else#like.. if you've agreed to not worry abt that and that you'll pick up the topic if anything ever changes#but how do you know if things have changed. how do you know what you want vs what you're wanting only in the moment#and how do you not make it awkward if you bring it up only to later realise maybe you were just having a weird moment#(like. I go through phases every month and I know it's coming. but I also know it'll go away again eventually)#(and like.. I guess I'm still terrified of setting expectations for things I can later not fulfill)#(and sure that's prob due to fucked up shit that happened in past relationships and this is not the same)#((..the difference a partner you can trust to keep their word on respecting your boundaries can make...))#anyway. scared shitless of starting sth I can't finish. also unsure if I want to start anything in the first place#and just so tired of not knowing where to even fucking start. gonna blame my migraine weirdness for posting this in the first place#a day in the life of..#(((how to know if maybe you'd like something now when you haven't in the past but now all parameters are different..#..and maybe it would be nice but maybe it would still suck and you'd end up hating it and feeling regretful..#..and maybe you'll never be able to get out of your head enough to just have a moment and go with it and be happy)))
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hangryyeena · 6 months ago
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#// vent#// personal#i always believe that my life just progressively gets worse with each passing birthday and i'm right every time#well it wasn't always like this#it was the reverse but after a long time of the opposite happening i just got so fucking tired#me saying anything in this post is fucking useless but i'm saying it anyways#but..... i'm tired of placing myself around people that make me feel like shit and i'm putting my foot down#and don't mean in a 'they go out of their way to treat me like crap' kind of way#i mean i feel like i don't matter around them or i feel like others are worth more than me to them#i feel like those corny posts where someone is standing alone while they watch other people be happy without any concern for you#and i feel like people only come to me when they want something from me like content or some other self-fulfilling thing#i am like..... really tired of begging people to treat me as an equal (especially as an artist) or at least be sympathetic to my problems#and i know all of this can be used against me but i don't care at this point#i'm tired of seeing red every time someone gets all of things i have to beg for-#-like basic respect or just someone saying something nice to me or my art#it hurts and i don't like having to throw any my kindness or generosity because i know i will never be treated the same way#like why do i have to beg for art reblogs or compliments when everyone else can get them without looking like a pathetic attention seeker#i don't understand what is inherently wrong with me that makes people go 'ew i don't like her or her art'#i've came up with all sorts of reasonings and i can't even decisively say what it is#i'm so tired#even after this nothing will change and u can guarantee this post will make it get worse#but this is just how i feel and i believe i have the right to vent without it being weaponized against me#i fear retaliation from people for venting and i shouldn't have to#long post#extremely long post#feel free to mute the '// vent' tag if you really don't want to hear my yapping
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ruthytwoshakes · 7 months ago
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I've been trapped in a cycle of pain since I was young, but recently it's been getting worse. I have 1 week of pain, 1 week of recovery, and only 2 weeks where I feel not terrible. And if I'm not able to recover than those 2 weeks turn into a couple days, rest are pain filled. I talk about my sensory issues and mental disabilities, but I don't think I've ever talked about this before. It scares me and I'd rather not acknowledge it.
You'd think I would be able to develop coping strategies, but I've never had any help or direction, live in an environment with many limitations and roadblocks, and I'm terrible at recognizing my own limits. And then the added guilt, aka internalized ableism, of even needing those coping strategies in the first place. So I'm just barely hanging on tbh.
I'm starting a new treatment today that will hopefully help, it so happens to coincide with the start of a new pain week. hooray. im in agony. But this might help with future weeks so I'm staying as hopeful as I can.
Why am I saying all this? I guess I owe people an explanation as to why I never finish any of my big projects. People who have been following for a while know that I start something huge and then drop it, and this is why. I desperately want to, but it kills me to do anything more than concept art and one-offs. I feel terrible for everybody who I've let down, so I'm gonna be honest from here on out.
I wont be finishing any big projects. Not until I move out and get more accommodations and (hopefully) a surgery to remove the organ causing me pain. I will work on whatever I have the energy for, but I can't promise anything. Feel free to request projects for me to work on! Motivation helps me work on them lol.
I really appreciate the love and community I've found here, it means so much to me. Helped me get through the tough times, and I wouldn't be where I am now as an artist without everybody's kind words and support. I love the tf2 community so much, everybody is so kind and creative. I can't wait to move out into a better environment where I'll finally be able to work on all my big projects. It's one of the big things motivating me to keep on going. I hope in the future that I'll be able to live off of art as my full time job! I physically and mentally can't do anything else lmao. Maybe I'll start a patreon, open commissions, I'm not sure yet.
Whatever the future holds, I know my place will be in the tf2 community. I have big plans guys, just bare with me for the next 3 years <3
Thanks so much, as always, and I'll be back in a week <3 -Ruth
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musical-chick-13 · 8 months ago
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Idk, I just...really hate having a brain/body that won't work. The Condition™ is so bad that I literally cannot focus on ANYTHING, even things that mean a lot to me. I can't string sentences together, doing any kind of standing physical activity for longer than 15 minutes will wipe me out for the rest of the day, and I am SO. TIRED. Sleep doesn't help. Caffeine doesn't help. Meds don't help. All of my labs keep coming back in range, and I just don't understand what's happening. What do I need to do.
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star-ocean-peahen · 1 year ago
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After watching Cinderella (the original animated movie, which was my favorite as a child), it strikes me how it solves many common problems people have with this fairy tale. Like:
Why did they try to identify the mystery girl using her shoe size? Because the bullheaded king's only clue to her identity was the shoe the Grand Duke picked up off the steps.
Why didn't the prince recognize her by her face? Because his father wouldn't involve him in the process at all, and wasn't the one going around trying to find her.
Why did the prince want to marry a lady he only met that night? Because his father was going to force him to marry someone, and he genuinely liked this woman.
Why did Cinderella want to marry a man she only met that night? Because marriage was her best and most secure way to freedom. Fucked up, but you can't say it's unrealistic for the setting of a fairy tale. She also genuinely liked him.
If they're using the slipper to find her, wouldn't it be more sensible to search for the person with the other slipper? Yes. The King is purposefully nonsensical and the Duke is purposefully terrified enough of him to carry out his orders to the letter. Furthermore, they end up doing that in the end anyway, because the Duke's glass slipper is shattered, and Cinderella brings out the one she has to prove her identity.
Why didn't the stepmother and stepsisters recognize Cinderella at the ball? Because they were dancing too far away, and then left the party to dance in private, which was possible because the King wanted very badly for his son to hit it off with someone and tried to arrange the best conditions for that to happen.
Why didn't Cinderella save herself? Because in real life, abuse victims should not have to shoulder that responsibility, and usually can't. In real life, you need and deserve an external support system. Asking for help, in this kind of situation, is very important. She is saved by others because she is loved. Because she is not alone. Because she has friends who love her, and want her to be happy and safe and free. Because in real life, people who want to help someone who is suffering are like the mice. We can't pull out miracle solutions, but we can provide companionship and if we're in the right place at the right time, we can help the person find a better life.
Why didn't the fairy godmother save Cinderella from her abusive household, or try to help her sooner? Because she's magic, and magic can't solve your problems. Quote: "Like all dreams, well, I'm afraid it can't last forever." This (and Cinderella's dream of going to the ball) is a metaphor for pleasurable things in bad circumstances. An ice cream won't get rid of your depression, but it will provide you with momentary happiness to bolster you, as well as the reminder that happiness in general is still possible for you. Cinderella doesn't want to go to the ball so she can get away from her stepmother and stepsisters, or so she can meet someone to marry and leave with. She wants to go to the ball to remind herself that she can still have things she wants. That her desires matter. This is important because the movie does a very good job of illustrating Lady Tremaine's subtle abuse tactics, all of which invisibly press the message that Cinderella doesn't matter. While going to the ball and fulfilling her dreams may not be a victory in the material sense, it is still a victory against Lady Tremaine's efforts.
Why is Cinderella's choice to be kind and obedient framed as a good thing, when you are not obligated to be kind to your abuser? This one walks a very fine line, but I think the movie still makes it make sense. Lady Tremaine never acknowledges her cruelty. She always frames her punishments of Cinderella as Cinderella's fault. Cinderella is interrupting, Cinderella is shirking her duties, Cinderella is playing vicious practical jokes. Cinderella is still a member of the family, of course she can go to the ball, provided she meet these impossible conditions. Lady Tremaine's tactics are designed to make Cinderella feel like she must always be in the wrong and her stepmother must always be in the right. If Cinderella calls her stepmother out on her cruelty, or attempts to fight back, Lady Tremaine can frame that as Cinderella being ungrateful, cruel, broken, evil, etc. If Cinderella responds to her stepmother's cruelty defiantly (in the way she's justified to), she's not taking control out of Lady Tremaine's hands. Disobedience can be spun back into her stepmother's control. She wants Cinderella to be angry and sad and show how much she's hurting. So since Cinderella is adapting to her situation, she chooses to be kind. Not only because she naturally wants to be and it's part of her personality, but because it is a form of defiance in its own way, and it allows her to keep a reminder of her agency and value. Her choice to be kind is her chance to keep her own narrative alive: she is not obeying because her stepmother wants her to and she has to do what her stepmother does, but because she wants to. It's a small distinction, but one that makes all the difference in terms of keeping her hope and identity. (Fuck, I wrote a whole paragraph about how this doesn't mean you can't be angry at people who hurt you or that you need to be kind to deserve help, and then deleted it by accident. Uh. Try again.) Expressing anger and pain is an important part of regaining autonomy and healing. Although it is commendable to be kind while you are suffering, it is NOT required for you to get help or be worthy of help. If Cinderella's recovery was explored beyond "happily ever after" she would need to let herself be angry and sad to heal. Cinderella is not only kind because it comes naturally to her, but because it's her defense against the abuse she's suffering. Everyone's story and experiences are different, and one does not invalidate the other.
Bonus round for answers that aren't part of the movie:
Why didn't Cinderella run away? Where would she go? Genuinely, in hundreds-of-years-ago France, where would she go if she snuck out of the window with a change of clothes? With her step-family, she's miserable and abused, but she's fed, clothed, and in no danger of dying or being taken advantage of by anyone other than her stepmother and stepsisters. Even if she escapes and manages to find financial security, her stepmother might be able to find her and get her back.
Why didn't Cinderella burn the house down with them inside it/slit their throats in the night/poison their food/etc.? Because that's a revenge fantasy, and this story is a fantasy about being saved. There's nothing wrong with making Cinderella into a revenge fantasy. That's perfectly fine, as long as you acknowledge that the other type of fantasy is also a valid interpretation. (I mean, the original fairy tale features the stepsisters getting their feet mutilated and all three of them getting their eyes pecked out, so go for it.)
Why isn't Cinderella more proactive in general? Because she's a child who has been abused for the back half of her life, who has had to be focused on survival because. you know. she's an abused kid.
How did she dance in glass slippers? Gotta agree with you there man, that's weird.
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inksandpensblog · 5 months ago
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And there's so many other ways it could go, besides the ones I've hypothesized here. So many factors that would influence the new course taken.
Also things like. Not even what they try to change or not-change, but what actually changes? How much do they alter the course of events before it's deviated so much from what they remember that they're in completely uncharted territory and it can't even be called the same story anymore? What remains constant, no matter how many other things change, and what significance is there in its consistency?
And how do they perceive the changes?
How do they cope with the fact that, no matter what changes, even if it's all the right changes, they'll always know what happened the first time? How do they deal with that, once they've gotten the perfect ending they wanted?
You know those fanfics where one of the characters gets sent back in time to an earlier point in the story and they get a chance to redo it all? I'm imagining that premise with the sticks.
There are so many factors to consider. Who goes back? When do they go back to? How far did their story get before they went back? Is it only one of them? What do they try to change? What do they try to preserve?
Imagine Rocket-era Victim finding himself back at the beginning. He knows better, now. He doesn't waste time throwing things and messing with tools. He goes right to the item library and clones himself again and again and again until the window is filled with his copies. Every copy gets a weapon, the close button is guarded, everyone's settings are raised as high as possible, and in laughably little time the cursor is destroyed. Noogai can do nothing to him now. But then again, this Noogai has barely done anything to him at all. But does that really matter to Victim, in the end?
Imagine Chosen, just after The Showdown, finding himself back on the computer on the fateful day of his escape. He remembers what happened, he goes through the motions until the cursor is pinned under his hand, clicking him free. But this time he doesn't blow up or run amok. This time he simply lands on his feet and stares out through the screen, for a moment. Until the cursor moves, at which point he immediately makes for the broadband icon and tears through it, diving in before he can stop himself. He wanders alone for a time, revisiting sites that once looked familiar, though this is the first time he's really gotten a good look at them when they're not covered in ash, and he doesn't make any friends but he doesn't make any enemies either, and the world is nicer when it isn't filled with screams. Eventually he retires from his aimless sojourn, settling down in a familiar grassy plain, where he spends his days enjoying the gentle breeze and watching the sky change colors and gobbling up sweets from a bakery that doesn't have his face plastered all over its doors and trying to forget the enormity of the absence by his side and never ever thinking about the fact that he's the only one with memories of a person who will never exist.
Imagine Blue, jumping into a nether portal with Yellow as gravity reverses and nether blocks rise, and finding himself in the nether for the first time with Green. This time, he pretends not to notice Purple when they're about to return to the desktop.
Imagine King, dissolving to particles in the cataclysmic beam of the staff, arms still reaching for the already-disintegrated form of Purple, and suddenly finding himself walking home from the playground with a small golden hand in his.
Imagine Purple, elytra discarded, running through a nether portal in despair, only to emerge on the Mac, wearing outdated elytra, with the dragon egg in hand.
So many possibilities.
#the way I would sob if I ever read something like the Chosen one#<- prev tags#ngl that one was a little inspired by an ATLA one of these that I found here#I didn't reblog it because I actively didn't want to remember it because it made me very sad#but it stuck its hooks in my mind nonetheless#but in it Aang basically went back to before he froze himself in the iceberg and took care of the war early#and then spent the rest of his life trying to arrange things so his friends would have perfect lives when they were finally born#but in the process someone slipped through the cracks and ended up never being born at all#and like#okay that aspect alone destroyed me#the thought that someone was lost in such a way#and then the story is still framed as having a happy ending because the people who DID get to be born all had better lives than last time#BUT ALSO#yeah Aang found most of his friends again but#last time he was a kid and now he's decades their senior#he can't have the same relationships he had with them the first time#and yeah if he hadn't had the context of the previous timeline and had actually met them for the first time like this#I'm sure it would've been a rich and fulfilling relationship he cultivated with them#but knowing the past? oof#still though#just. the idea that fixing the story requires the removal of someone who had a piece of your heart#augh#and it's ESPECIALLY bad with Dark and Chosen because NEITHER OF THEM HAD ANYONE ELSE#no one else is going through life feeling like someone should be where Dark used to be#Dark has nobody else to miss him because he didn't matter to anyone but Chosen#he never tried to connect with anyone else#and now that he's gone Chosen has no one because he never tried to connect to anyone else either#Chosen saved the world but now HIS world is hollow and empty#he got the peace he wanted and he lost the person he wanted it with#...man now I'm sad
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hoshifighting · 9 months ago
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Urban Hearts, Rural Souls
"Never had it this good before, huh?" he teased, his voice dripping with satisfaction as he watched you squirm beneath him. "And what about those boys from your city?" he taunted. "Do they fuck you this good? Huh?"
— Synopsis: Where you are a Rich Girl abruptly sent to the countryside by your worried parents, there, you meet Mingyu, the farmer's son, who introduces you to something that defies the shallow trappings of city living. — WC: 10.6k — WARNINGS: Smut, angst, fluff, oral (f. and m. receiving), intense sex, crying, dirty talk, cum eating, g'spot stimulation, wet pussy and etc. — Reader! Rich Spoiled Girl X Farmer! Mingyu
Wrapped in designer clothes from head to toe, strutting around in those expensive heels like you owned the world. And maybe you did, in a way.  You were the kind of girl who had it all – overpriced clothes hanging in your closet like trophies, expensive cars parked in the driveway like shiny jewels, and a life filled to the brim with luxury. Your every whim was catered to, your desires instantly fulfilled with the swipe of a credit card.
But behind all the glitz and glamour, there was a gnawing emptiness that even the shiniest baubles couldn't fill. Your parents, bless their worried hearts, watched from the sidelines, knowing they had a hand in creating this materialistic monster. They'd given you everything you ever wanted, but maybe they didn't realize they were also giving you a one-way ticket to blindness.
You were always craving the next big thing, the newest gadget, the trendiest outfit. But in your quest for more, you lost sight of what truly mattered. Genuine connections, simple pleasures, the beauty of a sunset—those things seemed to fade into the background against the allure of luxury.
Your parents, busy with their own pursuits of wealth and success, rarely saw you at home. They provided you with everything money could buy, but as time passed, they began to realize that they had unwittingly traded your presence for material possessions.
"Sorry, I can't go to this dinner, I already promised my friend that I would club with her tonight," you said, leaving the keys of a Porsche in your hands, closing the door.
"Sorry, I'm going shopping today," you said, looking at yourself in the mirror, leaving and closing the door again.
"Sorry, I'm going to hang out with Jisoo today," you said, once more leaving the keys of a Porsche in your hands, closing the door.
Your parents tried to intervene, gently nudging you towards a more meaningful existence. But you brushed off their concerns, too wrapped up in your own world of excess to see the wisdom in their words. After all, why settle for less when you could have it all?
Yet, deep down, a small voice whispered that maybe there was more to life than the next shopping spree or exclusive event. Maybe true happiness wasn't found in the gleam of a diamond or the purr of a sports car engine.
There you were, lounging by the pool with your phone in hand, completely engrossed in the digital medias. The sun beat down, casting shimmering reflections on the water's surface as you scrolled and tapped away, oblivious to everything else around you.
Suddenly, your mom emerged from the doorway, her expression serious yet gentle as she made her way towards you. She called out your name, her voice cutting through the haze of your screen-induced trance. With a sigh, you reluctantly tore your gaze away from your phone, realizing that this was no ordinary interruption.
She explained that it was time for a chat, a real one, away from the distractions of social media and status updates. You hesitated for a moment.
Eventually, you acquiesced, dragging yourself out of the pool and wrapping a robe around your damp skin. As you followed your mom back into the house, you couldn't shake the feeling of apprehension that settled in the pit of your stomach. 
You found your parents sitting at the dining table, their expressions unusually serious. With a nonchalant air, you plopped down in front of them, taking a leisurely sip of your juice.
Your dad cleared his throat, his tone carrying a weight of concern. "Sweetheart, we need to talk. Your mom and I have been growing increasingly worried about you."
You fought the urge to roll your eyes. Here we go again, you thought, another lecture about how you only cared about material things.
Your mom chimed in, her voice gentle but firm. "We know you might not like what we have to say, but we truly believe it's for the best."
You raised an eyebrow, already anticipating the worst. "Let me guess, you're cutting off my credit cards?"
Your dad let out a humorless scoff. "As tempting as that may sound, no. But we have decided that it's time for you to take a break from this lifestyle. You need to step back and reassess what truly matters in life."
You couldn't help but scoff, the corners of your mouth twisting into a mocking smile. "Let me guess, you're sending me to some remote island resort to 'find myself'?"
Your parents exchanged a glance before your dad spoke again, his tone grave. "Actually, we've arranged for you to spend some time in the countryside. In the home of some dear friends of ours. It'll be a chance for you to unwind, disconnect, and maybe gain some perspective."
You leaned back in your chair, disbelief written all over your face. "You've got to be kidding me. You're seriously sending me to some rustic farm in the middle of nowhere?"
But as you looked into their unwavering gazes, you realized they weren't joking. They were dead serious about this. And suddenly, the prospect of trading designer labels for mud-stained boots didn't seem so far-fetched after all.
Your dad's words hit you like a ton of bricks. "Wait, you're telling me you didn't even mention this earlier?" you exclaimed, eyes wide with disbelief. "This has to be some kind of joke, right? You can tell me now."
But before your dad could respond, his phone rang, interrupting the conversation. As he answered, you stood there dumbfounded, watching him hurriedly talk to the person on the other end.
"Oh hello, yes yes, she's traveling today. She's getting ready. Thank you so much, Mr. Kim," your dad said into the phone before hanging up.
You felt a rush of panic as reality set in. They were serious. You were really being whisked away to some countryside retreat without so much as a warning.
Rushing to your room, you flung open your largest suitcase, hastily stuffing it with your best clothes, your mind still reeling from the sudden turn of events. Designer dresses and high heels made way for practical boots and sturdy jackets, a stark departure from your usual wardrobe.
You barely had time to indulge in one last comforting soak in your oversized tub before the reality of the situation hit you like a splash of cold water. Sitting on the couch, arms crossed, your suitcase stood by your side like a silent sentinel.
Despite your indignation and discomfort with the whole situation, you knew deep down that your parents only wanted what was best for you. But seriously, how did they think this was a good idea? Just the thought of mosquitoes made you shiver involuntarily.
As you heard the honk from the driveway, you begrudgingly grabbed your suitcase and followed your parents to the door. Stepping outside, you were met with a man who greeted you with a warm smile, remarking on how much you had grown. He was the friend of your father, the same one you had seen in old family photos.
Despite your lingering resentment, you treated him with the utmost politeness. After all, he was just following your parents' instructions, and he seemed genuinely kind.
Your parents bid you farewell, their seriousness about the whole ordeal evident in their expressions. But before you could climb into the car, your mom stopped you, snatching your phone from your hands. You scoffed incredulously, "What, no phone too?"
She simply nodded, stating matter-of-factly, "There's no internet anyway."
With a frustrated sigh, you allowed yourself to be pushed into the car, the middle-aged man already taking your suitcase and stowing it in the trunk. As the car pulled away from the driveway, you couldn't help but wonder what kind of wilderness adventure awaited you in the countryside.
As the car rolled along the winding countryside roads, Mr. Kim struck up a conversation with you, perhaps sensing your unease.
"So, your parents tell me you're not too thrilled about this little getaway," he began, his tone light and friendly.
You glanced at him, unsure of how much to reveal. "Yeah, you could say that. I'm more of a city person, you know? This whole countryside thing isn't really my scene."
He chuckled softly, his eyes crinkling at the corners. "I figured as much. But hey, sometimes it's good to shake things up a bit, right? You might find you enjoy it more than you think."
You raised an eyebrow skeptically. "I highly doubt that."
Undeterred, he continued, asking you about your life in the city, your favorite hangouts, and the luxuries you were accustomed to. With each response, he laughed, seemingly amused by the stark contrast between your world and the one you were about to enter.
"You know," he said with a grin, "sometimes it's the unexpected experiences that end up being the most memorable. Who knows, you might discover a whole new side of yourself out here."
As the car rumbled along the road for what felt like hours, the familiar hum of the city fading into the distance, you watched as the asphalt gradually transformed into a dusty dirt road. The scenery changed from towering skyscrapers to vast expanses of green fields and rolling hills.
Finally, the car came to a stop, and the man turned to you with a smile. "Well, we're here," he announced cheerfully.
You peered out the window, taking in your surroundings. Before you stretched acres of farmland, dotted with quaint wooden buildings and surrounded by lush vegetation.
This was certainly a far cry from the luxury hotels and high-rise penthouses you were accustomed to, but there was a certain allure to its simplicity that intrigued you.
Mr. Kim gets out of the car, saying he's going to ask for help with your suitcases, and disappears into the house.
Stepping out of the car that had transported you from the city to the countryside, with a disdainful glance around, you smoothed down your summer dress and adjusted your sunglasses, attempting to shield yourself from the glaring sun.
Just as you were about to take a step forward, your designer boots caught on a loose cobblestone, and you stumbled clumsily, arms flailing wildly as you tried to regain your balance.
With a loud yelp, you crashed ungracefully into a pile of hay, your dress now adorned with specks of dirt and straw. Uttering a few curses under your breath, you began to clean yourself off, feeling thoroughly irritated by the whole debacle.
To your surprise, you heard a sincere laugh echoing from somewhere nearby. "Smooth entrance." came the amused voice.
Startled, you looked up to see a tall, muscular guy leaning against the porch, clad in a simple white tank top and worn jeans. He had the rugged look of someone who spent their days working the land, and you couldn't help but feel a pang of annoyance at his false amused expression.
"Very funny," you muttered, shooting him a withering glare as you brushed off the last of the hay from your dress.
The guy smirked at your retort, "Hey, don't blame me for your lack of grace," he teased, stepping closer to you.
You crossed your arms defensively, shooting back, "Well, don't blame me for your lack of fashion sense."
He chuckled, unfazed by your jab. "Fashion sense? Please. I'd take practicality over designer labels any day."
Rolling your eyes, you scoffed, "Easy for you to say when you probably haven't stepped foot in a city in years."
His smirk widened, and he tilted his head, challenging you. "And what's wrong with that? Country life has its perks, you know. Fresh air, wide open spaces... not to mention, real food."
You narrowed your eyes, feeling a surge of defiance. "Oh, please. I'll take a five-star restaurant over your farm-to-table nonsense any day."
With a shrug, he flashed you a knowing grin. "We'll see about that."
He furrows his eyebrows as he reaches for your suitcases, grunting slightly as he lifts them from the ground. "What the hell are you packing in here, bricks?" he mutters, struggling slightly under the weight. 
You couldn't help but roll your eyes at his dramatics. With his broad shoulders and muscular arms, it was obvious he could easily handle the weight. But instead, he seemed intent on putting on a show of struggle.
As he hoisted the suitcases up, you glanced at his impressive physique, a stark contrast to your own slender frame. "Oh, I don't know," you replied casually, masking your amusement. "Maybe you're just not as strong as you think you are."
His expression darkened at your taunt, and you could practically see the steam coming out of his ears as he begrudgingly followed you towards the house. "Yeah, whatever," he muttered, his voice tinged with annoyance.
You couldn't resist a small smirk as you walked ahead, enjoying the satisfaction of getting the last word in.
As you approach the quaint farmhouse, nestled amidst the serene countryside, you're greeted by a picturesque scene straight out of a storybook. Lush greenery and vibrant foliage surround the charming abode, a small porch extends from the front of the house, its weathered floorboards worn smooth by years of use, a few well-worn rocking chairs moving with the breeze. 
You glanced around the bedroom, taking note of the meticulously prepared bed with towels neatly arranged on top. Despite your initial skepticism, it was clear that some effort had been put into making you feel welcome.
Mingyu stood beside you, his expression unreadable as he watched your reaction. For a moment, there was silence between the two of you, the air thick with tension.
Just then, Mr. Kim appeared in the doorway, a warm smile on his face. "Ah, I see you've met my son, Mingyu," he said, placing a hand on Mingyu's shoulder. "He'll be helping out around here during your stay."
Mingyu flashed you a half-hearted smile, his expression tinged with a hint of mockery. "Yeah, we had the great pleasure of meeting earlier," he said, his tone dripping with sarcasm.
You raised an eyebrow, a smirk playing on your lips. "Oh yes, it was truly unforgettable," you replied, matching his mocking tone. "I especially enjoyed the part where I ended up covered in hay."
Mr. Kim chuckled at the banter between you and his son, clearly amused by the exchange. "I'm sure you two will get along just fine," he said with a knowing smile, before leaving you to settle in.
Feeling a bit lost and unsure of what to do with yourself, you decided to head back to the living room. As you entered, you spotted Mingyu in the kitchen, busy mixing something on the stove, while a woman arranged antique stamped dishes on the table.
Her warm smile drew your attention, and you couldn't help but admire her grace as she went about her tasks. When she noticed your presence, she immediately set aside her cooking apron and approached you, enveloping you in a tight hug.
You returned the gesture, feeling a sense of warmth and comfort wash over you in her embrace. She introduced herself as Mrs. Kim, and her genuine compliment about your appearance made you blush, a shy smile tugging at your lips.
Before you could respond, you caught Mingyu's glance from across the room. When your eyes met his, he quickly looked away, returning his focus to the task at hand.
Feeling a bit flustered by the unexpected attention, you cleared your throat and glanced around the room, searching for something to say. "Thank you, Mrs. Kim" 
Ah, but you missed your 16-seat table. Your silvered forks and knives…
She beamed at your words, her eyes sparkling with warmth. "Oh, it's nothing, dear. Just a simple meal to welcome you to our home," she said warmly, patting your arm affectionately.
Despite your initial frustration and discomfort with the abrupt change in scenery and the unfamiliar accents surrounding you, you couldn't deny the genuine warmth and hospitality of the Kims. As you observed Mrs. Kim bustling around the kitchen and Mingyu's earnest efforts to make you feel welcome, a sense of guilt began to gnaw at you.
As Mrs. Kim served you a plate of food, you couldn't help but feel a bit overwhelmed by the array of dishes laid out before you. Unsure of what to pick, you glanced around nervously, feeling the weight of everyone's expectant gazes upon you.
Taking a tentative first bite, the food was simple yet bursting with deliciousness, each bite infused with a warmth and comfort that you hadn't realized you were craving.
Your eyes widened in surprise as you savored the food, a genuine smile spreading across your face. "Wow, this is really good," you exclaimed, unable to hide your delight.
The Kims exchanged knowing glances, their smiles widening at your enthusiastic reaction. It was clear that they were pleased to see you enjoying their home-cooked meal.
As you continued to eat, you found yourself digging in with gusto, savoring every bite as if it were the most delicious thing you had ever tasted. It was a stark contrast to the fast food and gourmet dishes you were accustomed to in the city, and yet, there was something undeniably special about this homemade meal made with love.
Mingyu and his dad shared subtle, satisfied smiles, their eyes twinkling with amusement as they watched you devouring the food with such enthusiasm. It was clear that they were pleased to see you embracing their culinary traditions and finding joy in the simple pleasures, for the first time? 
As you rolled up your sleeves and began to help with the dishes, Mingyu appeared at your side with a teasing smirk. "Well, I'm surprised to see you know how to wash a plate," he remarked, his tone laced with playful incredulity.
You couldn't help but roll your eyes at his playful jab. "Oh, please. It's not like I've never washed a dish before," you retorted, scrubbing a plate with more force than necessary.
Mingyu chuckled at your defensive tone, his eyes twinkling with amusement. "I'm just surprised, is all. Figured someone with nails as pristine as yours would be afraid to get them dirty," he teased, gesturing to your perfectly manicured hands.
You shot him a pointed look, a hint of irritation creeping into your voice. "My nails will be just fine, thank you very much." you replied curtly.
After finishing up with the dishes, you managed to steal a quiet moment for yourself. Making your way to the bathroom, you were pleasantly surprised to find that there was hot water available, despite being in the midst of a countryside farm. And as you drifted off to sleep, the sound of crickets chirping outside lulling you into a peaceful slumber.
As the sun streamed through the window, bathing the room in a warm glow, you slowly stirred from your sleep, feeling more refreshed than you had in ages. The sound of a rooster crowing in the distance filled the air, a gentle reminder that you were far from the hustle and bustle of city life.
Just as you were about to stretch, you heard a familiar voice at your door. Groaning inwardly, you sat up, blinking away the remnants of sleep as you focused on the figure standing in the doorway.
There stood Mingyu, holding a pair of buckets in his hands. "Hey, sleepyhead," he called out, a hint of mischief dancing in his eyes. "Time to rise and shine. We've got a cow to milk."
You blinked in disbelief, your mind struggling to process the request. Milk a cow? Surely he must be joking. But as you glanced out the window and saw the sun rising higher in the sky, and the way he stood at the door, you realized that he was serious.
With a resigned sigh, you pushed back the covers and swung your legs over the side of the bed, steeling yourself for the unfamiliar task ahead. 
You couldn't help but roll your eyes at Mingyu's teasing remark as he caressed the cow with practiced ease. "Yeah, well, I figured I'd take precautions after yesterday's little incident," you retorted, gesturing to your brightly colored galoshes.
Mingyu chuckled at your response, shaking his head in amusement. "Fair enough," he conceded, his eyes twinkling with laughter. "But I've got to admit, you look a bit out of place here on the farm."
You huffed indignantly, feeling a pang of annoyance at his comment. "And what exactly am I supposed to look like?" you shot back, crossing your arms defensively. "Peppa Pig jumping in muddy puddles?"
Mingyu's laughter rang out loud and clear, the sound echoing through the barn as he shook his head incredulously. "Hey, I'm just saying, those boots aren't exactly farm chic," he replied, unable to hide his amusement.
You resisted the urge to roll your eyes again, instead choosing to focus on the task at hand. As Mingyu nodded towards the bucket under the cow and the small stool nearby, you took a deep breath, steeling yourself for the challenge ahead.
As you continued to milk the cow with gentle, tentative strokes, Mingyu couldn't help but chuckle at your cautious approach. "If you keep going at this pace, we'll be here until evening," he teased, shaking his head in mock exasperation.
You couldn't help but sulk at his teasing, feeling a pang of self-doubt creeping in. "I'm just afraid of hurting her," you admitted softly, glancing down at the cow's udders with concern.
Mingyu rolled his eyes playfully, squatting down behind you and gently taking your hands in his. "Here, let me show you," he murmured, his voice low and soothing as he guided your movements.
As his warm hands enveloped yours, you felt a jolt of electricity shoot through you, you couldn't help but be drawn to the way his chest pressed against your back, his breath tickling your ear as he whispered instructions. Lost in the sensation of his touch, you found yourself forgetting about the task at hand, your focus shifting entirely to him. 
"See? It's not so hard, is it?" Mingyu's voice broke through your thoughts, his tone gentle and encouraging.
Oh, it sure is, with those arms around you.
You nodded slowly, still feeling a bit flustered by the unexpected closeness between you. "Yeah, I guess not."
As you watched the chickens with a mixture of curiosity and apprehension, your mouth opened and closed like a fish out of water, unable to find the words to express your uncertainty.
Noticing your hesitation, Mingyu couldn't help but chuckle at your predicament. "Looks like it's time to collect some eggs," he remarked, gesturing towards the coop with a smirk.
Taking a deep breath, you steeled yourself for the task ahead and stepped into the coop, determined to prove that you were capable of handling farm chores. But as soon as you entered, the chickens seemed to sense your unease and began to peck at your legs and feet, their sharp beaks causing you to yelp in surprise.
Jumping back in alarm, you flailed your arms wildly, trying to fend off the feathery assailants as Mingyu looked on, shaking his head in amusement. "Well, that's one way to get the eggs," he quipped, unable to suppress his laughter at your antics.
Feeling flustered and more than a little embarrassed, you quickly retreated from the coop, shooting Mingyu a sheepish look. "I think I'll leave the egg collecting to the experts," you muttered, feeling defeated.
Mingyu grinned, his eyes twinkling with mischief as he watched you dust yourself off. "Don't worry, princess, I'll take care of it," he teased, reaching for the basket and heading towards the coop with a knowing smirk.
Mingyu couldn't help but chuckle at the sight of you sprawled out on the sofa, your face flushed from the sun and your body looking utterly exhausted. His mom joined in with a soft giggle, amused by your worn-out appearance.
"Looks like someone had quite the day," Mingyu remarked with a grin, his eyes twinkling with amusement as he observed you from across the room.
You let out a tired groan, your limbs feeling heavy and your muscles aching from the day's activities. "I feel like I've run a marathon," you admitted with a weary smile, unable to hide the exhaustion in your voice.
Mingyu's mom nodded in understanding, her eyes filled with warmth and affection as she looked at you. "It takes some getting used to, but you'll adjust," she reassured you, her voice gentle and reassuring.
Mingyu flashed you a reassuring smile, his gaze lingering on you with a hint of admiration. "Yeah, you'll get used to it," he echoed, his voice soft and reassuring.
As you lay on the sofa, your mind drifted to thoughts of your friends back in the city. You could already imagine their laughter and teasing when they heard about your countryside misadventures.
The image of them laughing at the idea of you "touching cow's tits" made you cringe, and you couldn't help but feel a twinge of embarrassment at the thought of being the subject of their jokes. And the mental image of you being chased by chickens while wearing bright yellow galoshes instead of your usual designer boots was almost too much to bear.
As you stood face to face with the towering horse, a surge of determination coursed through you. You were determined to prove to Mingyu that you were capable of handling any challenge that came your way, no matter how unfamiliar or daunting.
With a defiant glare, you met Mingyu's gaze head-on, refusing to back down from the challenge before you. "Did you know that horseback riding is expensive enough for me to know?" you retorted, your voice laced with confidence.
Mingyu raised an eyebrow at your defiant remark, his hands on his hips as he regarded you with a mixture of amusement and skepticism. "Is this a dare?" he asked, a hint of challenge in his tone.
You smirked, your eyes gleaming with determination. "It's not a dare if I'm going to win," you replied boldly, your confidence unwavering.
Mingyu chuckled at your bravado, shaking his head in amusement. "Well, we'll see about that," he replied with a smirk of his own. "But I'll have you know, a farmer can ride way better than a rich girly who did hipstism."
As you settled into the saddle and urged the horse forward, you felt a surge of exhilaration coursing through your veins. With each powerful stride of the horse beneath you, you felt a sense of connection and freedom unlike anything you had ever experienced.
Glancing back at Mingyu, who was hot on your heels, you couldn't help but smirk at the competitive gleam in his eye. With a determined flick of the reins, you urged your horse to pick up the pace, the wind whipping through your hair as you galloped across the long field.
Feeling the rhythm of the horse's movements beneath you, you couldn't help but feel a sense of exhilaration as you rode faster and faster, the thrill of the chase driving you forward.
But as you approached the towering mount of straw ahead, Mingyu's voice rang out behind you, announcing the end of the race. "This is it!" he shouted, his voice carrying over the wind.
You turned to face him with a confident smile, your eyes sparkling with determination. "Bet," you replied, your voice filled with certainty as you prepared to take on the challenge ahead.
s you crossed the finish line first, a victorious grin spread across your face. You patted the horse affectionately, thanking it for its speed and cooperation, a playful twinkle in your eye as if expecting a response from the animal.
Mingyu appeared right behind you, his expression a mixture of surprise and begrudging admiration. He glanced at you, clearly not wanting to give the impression that he was impressed, but failing miserably.
You couldn't help but laugh at his unsuccessfully concealed expression, a playful smirk tugging at your lips. "Looks like I win," you teased, unable to resist the opportunity to gloat a little.
Mingyu rolled his eyes, but there was a hint of a smile playing at the corners of his lips. "Beginner's luck," he muttered, trying to brush off his defeat with a nonchalant shrug.
But you could see through his facade, and you knew that deep down, he was impressed by your riding skills. "Sure, keep telling yourself that," you replied with a playful wink, reveling in your victory.
As the days turned into weeks, Mingyu and his parents couldn't help but notice a change in you. At first, they were surprised by your transformation. They had expected you to grow restless and bored, eager to return to the comforts of city life. But instead, they watched in awe as you flourished in your new surroundings.
While you may have initially viewed your newfound chores as a means to an end, a way to expedite your return to the comforts of home, you couldn't deny the genuine joy and fulfillment you experienced in caring for the animals and immersing yourself in farm activities.
With each passing day, as you spent more time in the stable and the fields, you discovered a sense of peace and contentment that you had never known before. 
Whenever Mingyu's parents were away in the center of the countryside, Mingyu took it upon himself to keep you entertained and engaged, determined to show you the lighter side of farm life and ensure that you didn't find the countryside boring.
Sometimes, he would teach you how to fish in the nearby stream, laughing as you fumbled with the bait and giggling as you shrieked with delight whenever you felt a tug on the line. From impromptu horseback races across the fields to makeshift picnics under the shade of a sprawling oak tree, Mingyu made sure that there was never a dull moment when you were together.
As the rain poured down outside, Mingyu looked at you with a mischievous grin, his eyes dancing with excitement. "Hey, since we're stuck inside anyway, how about we play a game of hide and seek?" he suggested, his voice filled with enthusiasm.
You couldn't help but raise an eyebrow in surprise at his suggestion. Hide and seek? Wasn't that a game for children? You hadn't played it in years, not since you were a kid back in the city.
"But isn't that game a bit... childish?" you asked, your tone laced with skepticism. After all, hide and seek seemed like such a simple and silly game, hardly befitting someone of your age and sophistication.
Mingyu laughed at your hesitation, shaking his head in amusement. "Come on, it'll be fun! Besides, it's not like we have anything else to do while we're stuck inside," he replied, his eyes sparkling with excitement.
You hesitated for a moment, unsure if you wanted to indulge in such a childish pastime. But as you glanced out the window at the dreary weather outside, you couldn't help but feel a spark of curiosity and excitement at the prospect of a little indoor adventure.
With a reluctant smile, you finally relented, nodding your head in agreement. "Alright, fine. But you owe me if I end up getting bored," you teased, unable to hide the hint of amusement in your voice.
Mingyu grinned at your acceptance, his eyes alight with excitement. "Deal," he replied.
As Mingyu's voice counted down from ten, you dashed around the house, your heart racing with excitement as you searched for the perfect hiding spot. His laughter echoed through the halls as he called out the numbers, his anticipation building with each passing moment.
Finally, you found it—a small space between the wardrobe and the wall in your room. It seemed like the perfect hiding spot, tucked away from sight with just enough room for you to squeeze into. With a quick glance over your shoulder to make sure no one was watching, you darted into the hiding place and pressed your back against the wall, your heart pounding with excitement.
As you waited in the darkness, the sound of Mingyu's footsteps grew closer, his laughter echoing through the room as he searched for you. You held your breath, trying to stifle the giggles threatening to escape as his footsteps drew nearer and nearer.
Suddenly, you heard a soft gasp as Mingyu's hand brushed against the wardrobe, his fingers grazing the edge of your hiding spot. Your heart skipped a beat as you held your breath, hoping he wouldn't find you.
As Mingyu's hand brushed against your shoulder and his fingers wrapped around your arm, pulling you out of your hiding place, you couldn't help but let out a startled gasp as your body collided with his. His laughter filled the room, echoing in the darkness, but you couldn't find it in you to join in.
"Sulking again, huh?" Mingyu teased, his voice warm and playful as he wrapped his other arm around you, pulling you close. 
You rolled your eyes in response, trying to hide the smile that threatened to tug at your lips despite your best efforts to maintain your facade of annoyance. "I don't sulk," you protested weakly, but even to your own ears, the protest sounded half-hearted.
Mingyu chuckled softly, the sound reverberating through the room as he held you close. "Sure you don't," he replied, his tone teasing but affectionate. 
Suddenly, you felt his hands on your face, his fingers tracing your features with a gentle touch that made your heart race. In the darkness, his touch seemed to intensify, his caress becoming more intimate as he explored the contours of your face with a tenderness that took your breath away.
As Mingyu's lips met yours, time seemed to stand still, the world falling away as you melted into his embrace. His lips were soft and warm against yours, sending a thrill of electricity coursing through your veins as he pressed your back against the wardrobe, his hand pulling you closer by your waist.
With a soft moan, you found yourself responding eagerly to his touch, your hands tangling in his hair as you deepened the kiss. Mingyu groaned against your lips, the sound sending a shiver of pleasure down your cunt as his tongue danced with yours.
As Mingyu's lips trailed down to your neck, igniting a trail of fire with each kiss, you couldn't help but moan softly, your body arching towards him in response to the overwhelming sensations coursing through you.
"M-Mingyu…"
"I can feel how much you want me," he continued, his voice low and seductive. "You're practically melting against me, begging for my touch."
His words sent a shiver of anticipation down your spine, your breath coming in ragged gasps as you surrendered yourself to the pleasure of his touch.
"You're so beautiful like this," he murmured, his lips brushing against your ear.
His hands roamed over your body, exploring every curve and contour with a hunger that matched your own. As he pressed his body against yours, you could feel the heat radiating from him, the intensity of his desire burning bright in the darkness.
As his fingers brushed against your hardened nipple through your top, you couldn't help but let out a soft gasp of pleasure, the sensation sending waves of heat coursing through you.
Feeling your reaction, Mingyu hissed in response, his desire evident in the husky tone of his voice. "I need to see you," he murmured urgently, his hands moving to lift your top, his fingers tracing the contours of your body in the darkness. "This darkness isn't helping."
With a nod of understanding, you waited patiently as he disappeared into the darkness, the anticipation building with each passing moment. And then, just as suddenly as he had left, he reappeared with two lanterns, the warm glow casting a soft light over the room.
And there you were, already naked and sitting on the bed, your body bathed in the soft light of the lanterns. Mingyu's eyes widened in surprise, a low hum of appreciation escaping his lips as he took in the sight before him.
"You're naughty," he murmured, his voice husky with desire as he approached you slowly. The warmth of the lanterns illuminated every curve and contour of your body, casting a mesmerizing glow that left him spellbound.
As the room filled with light, you couldn't help but catch your breath at the sight of Mingyu standing before you, his features illuminated in the golden glow of the lanterns. His eyes burned with desire as he looked at you, his gaze traveling over your body with hunger and longing.
With a soft smile, he stepped closer, the warmth of the lanterns enveloping you both. "Now I can see every inch of you," he murmured, his voice thick with desire. 
s Mingyu's hands deftly removed his shirt, tossing it aside with a casual flick of his wrist, your eyes were drawn to the sight of his toned, muscular body illuminated by the warm glow of the lanterns. His hard work and dedication were evident in the way his muscles rippled beneath his skin, sending a shiver of desire coursing through you.
Instinctively, your legs pressed together, the heat pooling between them as you felt the unmistakable arousal building within you. Mingyu's presence was intoxicating, his sheer physicality leaving you breathless and eager for more.
Unable to resist the temptation any longer, you reached out to him, your hands tracing the contours of his chest and abdomen with a hungry urgency. His skin was warm beneath your touch, his muscles firm and taut as you explored every inch of him with a sense of wonder and reverence.
As your fingers trailed lower, tracing the outline of his hardened arousal, a low groan escaped Mingyu's lips, his desire mirroring your own.
As you untangled his belt and lowered his jeans, your desperation was palpable, your need for him evident in every movement. Mingyu watched you with a knowing smile, his lip caught between his teeth as he observed your eagerness.
With a sense of anticipation building between you, you got down on your knees before him, your eyes pleading as you lowered his underwear, revealing his thick, pulsing cock. It lay heavy on your face, the weight of it sending a thrill of excitement coursing through you.
Mingyu's breath caught in his throat as he watched you, his desire growing with each passing moment. "That's it, baby," he murmured huskily, his voice thick with lust. "Show me how much you want it."
With a slow, provocative motion, you began to suck on the tip of his cock, teasing him with your tongue as you savored the taste of him on your lips. Mingyu groaned in pleasure, his hands tangling in your hair as he urged you on.
But then, with a sudden shift in his demeanor, Mingyu's voice took on a commanding tone. "Enough teasing," he growled, his gaze dark with desire. "I want you to suck it, all of it. Show me how good you can make me feel."
As you obediently lowered your head, taking all of Mingyu's length into your mouth, you could feel him groaning in pleasure above you. His hands tightened in your hair, gripping it firmly as if he were holding onto reins, his fingers wrapping around your locks like a lasso.
With each deep thrust, he urged you on, his voice thick with desire as he commanded you to take him deeper. "That's it," he moaned, the sound reverberating through your body as you continued to obey his every whim. "Just like that, baby, all the way in."
As you relaxed your jaw, allowing Mingyu's thick cock to press against the back of your throat, a wave of pleasure surged through him, causing his knees to falter for a moment. But you remained steadfast, your determination unwavering as you held your breath and took him deeper, allowing him to penetrate you fully.
Mingyu's grip on your hair tightened as he let out a guttural groan of pleasure, his hips bucking involuntarily as he was overcome by the intense sensation of your throat enveloping him. The feeling of your warm, wet mouth engulfing him completely sent waves of ecstasy coursing through his body, igniting a fire within him that threatened to consume him whole.
With each deep thrust, he felt himself losing control, his desire mounting to dizzying heights as he surrendered himself completely to the overwhelming pleasure of the moment. And as you continued to take him deeper, your throat accommodating his girth with ease, he knew that he was on the brink of an explosion unlike anything he had ever experienced before.
As Mingyu pulled on the lasso of your hair, halting just before he reached his climax, you let out a whimper of anticipation, your body trembling with need. He pulled you up and pushed you onto the bed, spreading your legs apart as he positioned himself between them. Your ass lifted off the bed, your breath coming in shallow gasps as you waited for his next move.
With a hungry look in his eyes, Mingyu dropped to his knees before you, his tongue darting out to lick a fat stripe along your slit. A moan escaped your lips as pleasure shot through you, your body arching off the bed in response. "Mmm... yes," you murmured, the sensation overwhelming as he continued to lap at your pussy with fervent eagerness.
Mingyu cooed softly as he tasted you, his tongue exploring every inch of your wetness with a skillful precision that left you dizzy with pleasure. "You taste so good," he whispered, his voice low and husky as he lavished attention on your sensitive folds. 
As Mingyu sucked on your clit, bobbing his head with a fervent eagerness that sent waves of pleasure coursing through you, you couldn't help but moan loudly, the sensation overwhelming you completely. "Ohh... yesss," you cried out, your voice filled with unrestrained passion as he worked his magic on you.
He held back a smirk as he felt your cunt throbbing with the approach of your orgasm, knowing that he had you right where he wanted you. With a wicked grin, he doubled down on his efforts, sucking your whole pussy hard, his tongue lapping at your juices with an insatiable hunger.
The intensity of his ministrations pushed you over the edge, your body convulsing with pleasure as the orgasm washed over you with a force that left you breathless. Mingyu smiled triumphantly as he felt you come embarrassingly fast, your moans filling the room with the sweet sound of your pleasure.
As Mingyu laid you down properly on the bed, he gazed into your eyes with a hunger that sent shivers down your spine. His voice was low and husky as he asked how much you wanted him to fuck you, and you could barely think straight, your mind clouded with desire.
With your orgasm still pulsing through your body, you almost drunkenly replied that you wanted him a lot, your words slurred with pleasure. Mingyu's lips curled into a wicked grin as he heard your response, his eyes smoldering with lust as he leaned in closer.
"And how much do you want this farmer to fuck you?" he murmured, his voice dripping with desire as he teased you with his words. The hint of his country accent sent a shiver of anticipation coursing through you, your body quivering with need.
You rolled your hips instinctively, searching for his cock, your movements desperate and needy. Mingyu chuckled softly at your eagerness, his hands roaming over your body possessively as he continued to taunt you with his dirty talk.
With a whimper of desire, you opened your mouth in an "o" of longing, unable to resist the overwhelming urge to feel him deep inside you. "A lot," you gasped, your voice trembling with need. "I want it... a lot... please..."
Mingyu's cock lay heavy against your belly, the sight of it making your breath catch in your throat. He looked at you with a wicked grin, his eyes burning with desire as he teased you with the promise of what was to come.
"Do you want my cock right here?" he murmured huskily, his voice sending shivers down your spine. "Inside of this pretty little pussy of yours?"
You could only nod eagerly, your body trembling with anticipation as you gazed up at him with lust-filled eyes. "Yes," you whispered breathlessly, your voice barely above a moan. "Please, Mingyu... I need it... I need you inside me..."
Mingyu's grin widened at your response, his desire reaching a fever pitch as he positioned himself between your legs, ready to claim you as his own. With a primal growl, he pushed himself inside you, filling you completely with his throbbing cock as you cried out in ecstasy.
As Mingyu kissed you with a hunger that matched your own, you cried out in pleasure, feeling your pussy clenching tighter around his throbbing cock with each thrust. Your hands roamed over his back, feeling every ridge and muscle beneath his skin as he moved with a primal intensity that drove you wild with desire.
Suddenly, he took his cock out and pushed back inside you with all his force, causing your head to be thrown back in ecstasy. The sensation of him filling you so completely, stretching you to your limits, sent waves of pleasure coursing through you, igniting a fire within you that threatened to consume you whole.
Mingyu's gaze locked with yours, his eyes boring into your soul as tears streamed down your cheeks, your body trembling with the intensity of his thrusts. He leaned in close, his voice low and husky as he whispered filthy words that sent shivers down your spine.
"You like that, don't you?" he murmured, his breath hot against your ear as he continued to pound into you with relentless force. "You like feeling my cock splitting you in half, don't you, baby?"
You could only whimper in response, your pussy clenching tightly around him at his words, sending a jolt of pleasure coursing through both of you. Mingyu stuttered for a moment, surprised by the intensity of your reaction, before letting out a low chuckle.
"Never had it this good before, huh?" he teased, his voice dripping with satisfaction as he watched you squirm beneath him. "And what about those boys from your city?" he taunted. "Do they fuck you this good? Huh?"
You shook your head vehemently, your legs trembling around his waist as you cried out in pleasure. "No," you screamed, the word torn from your lips in a primal moan. "They don't... ah!"
Mingyu grinned triumphantly at your response, his own pleasure mounting to dizzying heights as he continued to drive you wild with desire. With each powerful thrust, he pushed you closer and closer to the edge, determined to show you just how good it could be with a real man like him.
As Mingyu's cock pounded into you relentlessly, a white ring formed around his shaft, evidence of your overwhelming arousal. He looked down at you with a smirk, his voice low and husky as he taunted you with his words.
"Can you hear how wet you are, baby?" he murmured, his breath hot against your skin as he leaned in closer. "You're practically dripping for me."
You blushed furiously at his words, feeling a surge of embarrassment wash over you at the realization of just how turned on you were. But despite your embarrassment, you couldn't deny the overwhelming pleasure coursing through your veins, driving you to new heights of ecstasy with each thrust.
You bit your lip nervously, unable to form a coherent response as Mingyu's cock continued to pound into you with relentless determination. Your back arched involuntarily, your body betraying you with its desperate need for more.
Mingyu's hips plunged deep into you, sending shockwaves of pleasure coursing through your body as you jolted, desperately reaching for his hand. He chuckled softly, his voice dripping with amusement as he teased you mercilessly.
"Oh, looks like I found it," he taunted, his thrusts growing harder and more relentless with each passing moment. "Right here... and here again. Is this where you want me, baby?"
You could only whimper in response, your mind consumed by the overwhelming pleasure of his touch. "I-I'm going to cum," you gasped, your voice thick with desire as your orgasm approached with dizzying speed.
Mingyu's hand tightened around yours, providing you with an anchor to hold onto as he continued to pound into you with an intensity that left you breathless. His hips worked deep against your G-spot, driving you closer and closer to the edge with each thrust.
"Come for me, baby," he whispered huskily, his voice laced with desire as he urged you on. "I want to feel you cumming around me."
As Mingyu noticed the way you tensed hard and squeezed his hand tightly, he could feel the intensity building within you. "You're going to cum so hard for me, baby"
And then, as if on cue, you let go, your body convulsing with the force of the orgasm that tore through you. Mingyu watched in awe as you came apart in his arms, your screams filling the room as you lost yourself completely to the pleasure.
"Fuck," he breathed, his voice hoarse with desire as he drank in the sight of you, your body trembling with ecstasy as you rode out the waves of pleasure. He didn't want to blink, didn't want to miss a single moment of the beautiful sight before him.
As your body finally relaxed, Mingyu withdrew himself from your swollen, sopping cunt. You looked up at him with a lazy smile, feeling completely satisfied but still hungry for more.
"Did you cum?" you asked, your voice laced with anticipation as you waited for his response.
Mingyu hesitated for a moment, but before he could answer, you cut him off with a mischievous grin, sticking your tongue out of your mouth playfully.
"Don't worry about that," he began, but you interrupted him, your eyes sparkling with mischief as you pleaded with him to cum for you.
"Come on, Mingyu," you urged, your voice dripping with desire. "I want to see you cum. I want to taste you on my tongue."
Mingyu's eyes widened in surprise at your boldness, but a wicked grin spread across his face as he realized just how much you wanted him. With a low growl of desire, he leaned in closer, his lips brushing against yours as he whispered his response.
"You're insatiable, aren't you?" he murmured, his voice thick with desire. "But I like it. I like it a lot."
As Mingyu gently arranged your hair, he positioned himself so that his cock was within reach of your mouth. You eagerly complied, your saliva mixed with your own lubrication serving as the perfect medium for him to stroke his throbbing cock.
With his heavy tip resting on your tongue, you felt the anticipation building within you once again. Your lips parted as you watched him with hungry eyes, eager to taste him once more.
Mingyu groaned softly as he began to masturbate his cock, the sensation of your tongue and lips against his sensitive skin driving him crazy. With each stroke, he grew harder and thicker in your mouth, his arousal evident in the way his cock throbbed against your tongue.
You moaned softly around him, the vibrations sending shivers of pleasure coursing through his body as he continued to pleasure himself with your eager mouth. And as his release approached, Mingyu's movements grew more urgent, his breath coming in ragged gasps as he edged closer and closer to the brink.
Finally, with a low growl of pleasure, Mingyu reached the point of no return, his cock pulsating as he spilled his hot cum onto your waiting tongue. You eagerly swallowed every drop, savoring the taste of him as he rode out the waves of his orgasm.
"I'm feeling so good," you murmur, a contented smile gracing your lips as you lay beside Mingyu.
"Do you?" he asks, his voice soft and filled with tenderness as he gazes at you.
You nod, feeling a warmth spreading through your body at his gentle touch. Mingyu brushes your hair away from your face, his fingers trailing lightly over your skin as he lays on his side, his eyes fixed on you with a look of adoration.
"Yeah," you reply, your voice barely above a whisper as you meet his gaze. "I feel amazing."
Mingyu smiles, his expression filled with affection as he leans in closer, pressing a tender kiss to your forehead. The atmosphere feels incredibly comfortable, more intimate and peaceful than ever before.
You blinked, the soft morning light filtering through the curtains as you slowly roused from sleep, only to find yourself alone in bed. The warmth of Mingyu's big body, which had been so comforting throughout the night, was noticeably absent, leaving you with a sense of emptiness.
As you sat up, rubbing the sleep from your eyes, you couldn't shake the feeling that the events of the previous night had been nothing more than a dream. But then, just as doubt began to creep in, the door swung open, and there stood Mingyu, shirtless and wearing only jeans, a tray of breakfast in his hands.
He flashed you a warm smile as he entered the room, the sight of him banishing any lingering doubts from your mind. "Good morning," he greeted you, his voice soft and filled with affection.
"Good morning," you replied, a smile tugging at the corners of your lips as you watched him approach. The sight of him, shirtless and bearing breakfast, made your heart skip a beat, and you couldn't help but feel a surge of warmth spread through you at the sight of him.
Mingyu set the tray down on the bedside table before climbing back into bed beside you, his warmth enveloping you once more. As you sat together, enjoying breakfast in each other's company.
In the middle of the afternoon, you was alone in your bedroom, Mrs. Kim appears with her phone, it was your parents, wanting to talk to you. You take the phone from Mrs. Kim with trembling hands, your heart racing with anticipation as you retreat to a secluded corner of the house. With bated breath, you answer the call, hoping against hope that it's your parents finally coming to rescue you from this unfamiliar place.
"Hello?" you say tentatively, the sound of your own voice echoing in your ears.
On the other end of the line, you hear your mother's voice, filled with concern and urgency. "Sweetheart, are you okay?" she asks, her tone fraught with worry.
You feel a surge of relief wash over you at the sound of her familiar voice. "Mom, it's me," you reply quickly, trying to keep your voice steady despite the emotions swirling inside you. "I'm okay, but I really want to come home. Can you please come get me? I need to tell you something…"
There's a moment of silence on the other end of the line before your mother responds, her voice heavy with regret. "Honey, I'm sorry, but we can't come get you right now," she says, her words hitting you like a punch to the gut. "We need you to stay there for a little while longer."
Your heart sinks at her words, the sense of disappointment threatening to overwhelm you. "But why?" you ask, your voice cracking with emotion. "I don't understand."
Before you can say anything else, you hear a click on the other end of the line, signaling that the call has ended. With a heavy heart, you lower the phone from your ear and turn around, only to find Mingyu standing there, his expression hardened and unreadable.
You swallow hard, feeling a sense of unease settle over you as you meet his gaze. "Mingyu, I..." you begin, but he cuts you off with a curt shake of his head before turning and walking out of the room, leaving you alone with your thoughts and a sinking feeling in the pit of your stomach.
You ran after him, your footsteps echoing in the stillness of the countryside as you desperately called out his name. But Mingyu didn't turn to look at you, his gaze fixed on the horizon as he continued walking towards the lagoon.
"Mingyu, please," you pleaded, your voice thick with emotion as you struggled to catch up to him. "Listen to me."
He finally stopped walking, but he still didn't turn to face you. Instead, he spoke with a tone of resignation, his voice heavy with disappointment. "I understand now," he said quietly. "You were just using me to pass the time until you could go home."
Your heart sank at his words, the guilt weighing heavily on your chest as tears welled up in your eyes. "No, Mingyu, that's not true," you insisted, your voice trembling with emotion.
"I... I care about you. What about yesterday? What we shared..."
But he cuts you off with a bitter laugh, shaking his head in disbelief. "Yesterday was a mistake," he says, his words like a knife to your heart. "It doesn't change the fact that you were never really here for me. You were just biding your time until you could leave."
Your mouth hung open in shock as Mingyu's words sliced through you like a blade, leaving you reeling with hurt and disbelief. Tears welled up in your eyes as you struggled to comprehend his harsh accusations.
"That's mean!" you finally managed to choke out, your voice trembling with emotion. "I know I'm wrong, but you're being so mean right now!"
Mingyu's attention snapped back to you at the sound of your sobs, his heart clenching with regret as he watched the tears stream down your face. He hadn't meant to hurt you so deeply, but in his anger and frustration, his words had cut far deeper than he had intended.
For a moment, there was silence between you, the weight of Mingyu's harsh judgment hanging heavy in the air. And then, finally, you spoke again, your voice barely above a whisper.
"It was a mistake then?" you asked, your words barely audible over the sound of your own ragged breathing. 
Mingyu hesitates, his own emotions swirling inside him as he struggles to find the right words. "No, it wasn't a mistake," he admits quietly, his gaze softening as he meets your tear-filled eyes. "Yesterday... what we shared... it meant something to me."
Your heart races as Mingyu's words sink in, a mix of hope and confusion swirling inside you. "Then why are you saying all of this?" you ask, your voice trembling with emotion. "If it meant something to you, then why..."
Mingyu cuts you off with a heavy sigh, his gaze dropping to the ground as he struggles to find the right words. "Because it's not going to work," he admits, his voice filled with resignation. "You're going back to your expensive bags and imported cars, and I'm going to be alone."
His words hit you like a punch to the gut, the realization of what he's saying sending a surge of pain through your chest. "But how can you be sure that I want to go home?" you protest, desperation creeping into your voice. "You didn't even heard the whole conversation. I need to go home, yes, but not because I want to leave you. I need to go home to tell my parents, my friends, that I want to stay here."
Mingyu's shoulders sag at your words, a flicker of hope shining in his eyes. "You want to stay?" he asks, his voice barely above a whisper.
You nod, tears pricking at the corners of your eyes. "Yes," you say softly. "And do you know what made up my mind?"
Mingyu's gaze searches yours, waiting for your answer.
"You did," you admit, your voice barely a whisper as you meet his gaze. "You and this life... it made me feel something real. Something I've never felt before."
For a moment, there's a glimmer of understanding in Mingyu's eyes, a flicker of hope that maybe, just maybe, things could work out between you. He takes a step towards you, reaching out as if to touch you, but you step back, your heart still raw from his earlier words.
"I'm hurt," you whisper, your voice breaking with emotion. "And I need some time alone to figure things out."
With that, you turn and walk away, leaving Mingyu standing there, his gaze following you with a mixture of longing and regret. And as you disappear from view, you can't help but wonder if you've made the right decision... or if you've just made a terrible mistake.
Mingyu stands in the doorway, his expression pensive as he takes in the sight of you curled up on the bed, your breath trembling from your recent tears. He hesitates for a moment, unsure of how to approach you, before finally taking a step into the room.
"I... I wanted to talk to you," he begins, his voice soft and hesitant. "I know things have been... difficult between us lately, and I just wanted to say..."
He pauses, struggling to find the right words as he searches your face for any sign of understanding. "When I first heard that a rich girl was coming to our farm, I'll admit, I had my doubts," he admits, his gaze dropping to the floor as he speaks. "I thought you would be like all the others – snobbish, entitled, looking down on us like we were beneath you."
He takes a deep breath, steeling himself for what comes next. "But you proved me wrong," he continues, his voice growing stronger with each word. "You learned everything we taught you, you got along with everyone, and... despite our bickering, you seemed so genuine."
Mingyu's words hang in the air, the weight of his apology lingering between you. He takes a step closer, his eyes pleading for understanding as he searches your face for any sign of forgiveness.
"I'm sorry," he says, his voice barely above a whisper. "I'm sorry for the way I've treated you, for the things I've said. I was wrong to judge you based on where you come from, and... I hope you can forgive me."
There's a vulnerability in Mingyu's voice that tugs at your heartstrings, a sincerity that you can't ignore. You feel a lump form in your throat as you meet his gaze, seeing the regret and remorse etched in his features.
"I... I forgive you," you whisper, your voice barely audible as you speak. "And... I'm sorry too. For the way I've acted, for... everything."
Mingyu's eyes soften at your words, a small smile tugging at the corners of his lips. "Thank you," he says, his voice filled with gratitude. "And... I hope we can start over. Put all this behind us and... move forward."
In the bustling city where love often feels like just another commodity, you found something rare and precious in the countryside with Mingyu – an intense and fast connection that seemed to defy all logic and expectation. It was as if you could parachute jump into this feeling without a second thought, without fear of falling.
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maybank5 · 15 days ago
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𝐩𝐚𝐫𝐚𝐝𝐢𝐬𝐞
pairing ⤜ yn x jj
summary ⤜ a happy future fic, because we need some healing; jj on the beach with his family reflecting on his life.
a/n ⤜ how are we doing fam? me? not so well. this has been the hardest fictional moment that's ever hit me. i'm choosing to believe our boy is still off somewhere and gonna have the best, most fulfilled and loving future. sending hugs and love to each of you!!
song inspo ⤜ no song inspo for this one; but i did have 'nights in white satin' on repeat as i wrote
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The sun is setting over the horizon, sinking down into the ocean and melting into streams of gold and orange against the shimmering water. JJ Maybank perches on his surf board for a moment, admiring it. He's never considered himself to be the most religious of people. Sure, he attended Sunday school as a kid, knows the bible stories decently enough; and yeah, there's times when he catches himself praying. Like the time John B got into that nasty accident, or when his son was born. There'd been complications, things had been touch and go for a moment. JJ had pressed his head against the glossy white wall of the hospital waiting area, hoping to God that things would be okay, as John B and Sarah rubbed his back comfortingly.
The one time JJ didn't pray might have been the one time he should. He'd been stabbed, by his son of a bitch father. Not Luke, the "real one" though JJ found it almost funny how he preferred to think of Luke fuckin' Maybank as his actual father. At least Luke had never tried to stab him. But that was beside the point; JJ had been stabbed, and things were not looking good. John B had felt for a pulse and had felt nothing. JJ can still remember the feeling of floating away, like riding a wave to the horizon. He hadn't prayed then. Instead, he'd made peace with his fate. He'd lived a pretty damn full life in 20 years, and if this was the end of it, so be it. At least on the other side, no one would be trying to hurt him, right? That sounded mighty nice to him. So he'd closed his eyes and let himself drift off towards that horizon.
Only instead, he'd woken up in a hospital, still very much alive. His best friends at his side. Pope and Kiara barely left his side, and John B had practically crawled into the bed with him to hold him in his arms until a nurse had yelled at him. JJ doesn't remember feeling such love until that moment. And that was when it all changed. He'd been given a second chance, and an opportunity to see just how loved and valued he is. He was never going to squander it or take it for granted again.
The sun is sinking lower, the water in front of him glittering in gold. JJ pushes his wet hair back off his forehead to admire it. Years ago he'd have just shrugged it off. Sunsets were a dime a dozen. Not anymore though. Now JJ takes the moment to sit and watch and appreciate.
He glances back to the shore, where his wife and baby are playing in the sand. Harley John Maybank's (it'd be a cold day in hell if JJ ever took the name of that man) new favorite thing was trying to rush to the water, his mom and dad hot on his heels. JJ could tell already that Harley was going to be a handful, and he couldn't fucking wait.
The waves were rising higher. It'd make for a sick surf tonight. JJ bites his lip, turns and paddles back to the shore. Some priorities rank higher than waves.
He tucks his board under his arm and hurries over to where the two of you are building a sandcastle with Harley's little castle-shaped buckets.
"Hey, baby," you glance up at your husband, reaching out and touching his cheek with his hand, always little assurances like that to make sure he's real, "Not surfing?"
"Nah," JJ shakes some water from his head, "Much rather'd build sand castles with this little one," he ruffles Harley's head of blonde hair, glistening in the sunlight.
You can't help but smile as he sinks down into the damp sand to help Harley stuff sand into his buckets. Moments like these is when it truly hits you, just how blessed you are.
JJ gently helps Harley, his eyes so soft and full of love and devotion. Harley John is his utmost pride and joy. He's always been soft with you, but the gentleness in which he treats your son is beyond anything you could imagine.
JJ packs the sand into the bucket with the back of a little plastic shovel. He wonders if maybe there was a time he'd done this as a boy, but shakes the thought from his head. It doesn't matter. He can do it now. He can do it with Harley.
"Sarah called earlier," your voice pulls JJ from his thoughts, "She and John B are going to have Baby Jackson christened. John B is supposed to ask you to be the godfather tomorrow, but Sarah couldn't wait to tell me. You know the two of them, it's not a church thing or anything. Just The Pogues and the ocean."
"Sounds nice," JJ says, wrapping his arms around Harley and pulling him softly onto his lap.
JJ reaches for your hand, pulling you to him as well. He presses a kiss the back of your hand, holding your hand and running his thumb over your knuckles. Nothing ever feels one hundred percent real unless JJ can feel it, touch it, revel in it. He tosses his head back as the evening breeze licks through his hair.
And in that moment, JJ can't help but stop and say thank you.
Because JJ Maybank lives every day in paradise.
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mythicmanuscripts · 4 months ago
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Need to know how our favorite HOTD subby babies respond to being called “good boy” 🥰
Ooo brilliant brilliant question!! I think what I'll do is right a little bit about how they reacted the first time and then a little bit about how the term is continued to be used? I hope that makes sense!
Sweet but NSFW subby content below!
JACE:
The first time you do it, the poor thing comes on the spot. He really didnt expect that sudden praise and honestly has no idea what to even do with himself about it. He had been so worked up, so needy and whiney and barely able to contain himself when you finally have him attention, so when you decided to suddenly call him good boy for the first time, he didnt stand a chance.
After this, it's a term Jace absolutely adores, but he's always careful to never seem too obvious with how much he loves it and how much he's always waning for you to call him that again. Jace is already such a needy little thing from the moment the clothes start coming off that the doesn't want to request even more from you. You think it's absolutely adorable that he thinks he's hiding how much he loves bring called that. You can see his eyes light up every single time, so of course you're well aware of how much he loves it..
AEMOND:
The first time you call aemond a good boy, he stop what he's doing and walks away. He doesn't say a single thing, just leaves. You run after him, confused about what could have upset him that much. It's only after you literally drag him back into your quarters that he finally just says he doesnt know why you'd make fun of him like that. That's one you realise that Almond thought the praise was a joke, that you were trying to hurt him.
That couldnt be further from the truth of course, but that's difficult for him to expect when all he's had his entire life is people making fun of his weaknesses. So when you tel him that you're being 100% serious, that he really has been so good and made you so happy? He just falls into your embrace and holds you extra right, crying softly for a little while.
He gets better and better at receiving praise without losing his mind, but good boy is one that will always make him go absolutely feral.
AEGON:
So there's actually this head cannon that I've had for a while and never really had the right opportunity to mention it about sub!aegon so I'm gonna do that here. I think that he knew he was a sub pretty quickly, and of course the women he pays in the brothels are more than happy to fulfil that goal. Aegon knows he likes it, knows he likes being told what to do and manhandled and fucked until he cries.
The problem though, is that it seems like for all the brothel workers, the only way to dominate him is so be mean and use humiliation and degradation. That part.... that part he hated.
So when he gets with you and you want to be in charge but you praise him instead of degrade him? Well, he's never setting foot into a brothel ever again.
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