#and like . using the non-binary as opposed to something else

[battleaxeproficiency]

taash non-binary confirmed , dragon age woke-guard real

[starlit1daydream]

On the subject of Equius Zahhak: hypersexuality and patriarchy.

It's been a hot minute since I promised to write something like this, and I've been meaning to test a new writing style for these big posts anyways - so I'm going to try my hand at explaining my personal interpretation of Equius Zahhak.

Equius is one of my favourite side characters in Homestuck, and though the individual components of his characterisation are intentionally facetious and humourous, all of these components then come together to form a fantastic and deeply layered commentary, however unintentional.

Let's begin with the basics: our introduction to Equius proper.

The narrative makes it clear from the start how you're meant to feel about this guy for starters - he's a creep and a weirdo. Nepeta says as much in their very first interaction on-screen:

This is backed up by the narrator themselves exhibiting a discomfort with him, painting him as a cryptic and eerily observant loner:

Once again, he's making people uncomfortable. Discomfort is going to be a very common theme going forward, particularly once we tap into Equius' personal interests and the justification behind them.

The next sign is when we first see him properly on-screen, and the narrator is immediately mortified by the state of his room and advises us to move on with the story.

So, immediately, any cognizant reader knows what's up. This guy is a joke character. A punchline, a fool, a weird asshole with no redeeming qualities. This is, of course, the intended reaction.

...Which then brings us to the subversions involved with Equius' character. Every single off-putting and strange thing about him is subsequently repainted in a more flattering light by the conclusion of his screen-time.

What begins as an overcontrolling, possessive demeanour towards Nepeta becomes a genuine, albeit perhaps overbearing desire to protect his moirail from harm. The context of him being Vriska's neighbour helps us infer that he's very, very aware of the dangers of FLARPing.

What starts as a bizarre and testosterone-poisoned obsession with strength becomes more of a fleshed-out character flaw. It's an inherent fault that Equius cannot control that brings him more distress than anything else. We'll delve into that later.

This is not, of course, to say that Equius is without genuine fault. You are still meant to find problems with his behaviour, of course you are; the Aradiabot fiasco is an intentional violation of personal agency based around an unhealthy obsession. He allows himself and his moirail to die because of his refusal to disobey the vapid and classist hemospectrum.

Okay, so why is he like this?

I'm glad you've asked. This is where this delves more into conjecture, based around a few different things.

The state of the internet and online culture at the time of Equius' inception; and the ramifications therein.

What we know to be true about the aspect of Void, and how Equius interacts with it.

The added retroactive context of Hussie's handling of queer topics (as a non-binary person themselves!), particularly on the subject of gender identity.

Let's start with point one.

Equius and hypersexuality.

At the time of Homestuck's inception, it was a veritable fact that the internet was overrun with overt sexuality, oft for the sake of shock value as opposed to arousal. Screamers and shock sites like 2girls1cup, goatse, Mr. Hands... (that last one is particularly relevant).

I cite Mr. Hands in particular because therein we get to the use of bestiality as a gross-out punchline. This is what Hussie's invoking with Equius; you're looking at this guy and seeing a gross freak who hangs horse porn on his walls. It's appealing to the fact that:

Homosexuality was considered a funny punchline.

The furry fandom was considered a funny puchline.

Bestiality was considered a funny punchline.

And so, this thirteen year old child hanging gay horse porn on his walls is meant to be played for laughs.

But with the retroactive lens we're looking at this through now? It's not only deeply disturbing for reasons I don't think I need to explain, but it's also a portrait of unhealthy teenage sexuality and the ramifications of exposure to explicit content at a young age.

Because it's a veritable fact that Equius does not understand boundaries and has a deeply flawed relationship with his sexuality. It's the kind of hypersexuality induced by childhood exposure to sexual material, and I would go as far as to call it a kind of CSE.

Need more proof of this? Dave Strider. Bro's weird sex puppets and usage of pornography as a punchline undeniably fucked Dave up, and explains the way he so regularly uses sex, particularly gay sex as a source of humour. Dave is the same problem that Equius rises, played seriously at a point in the story wherein these things are no longer treated so facetiously.

Furthermore, it becomes clear that Equius does not actually understand what he is consuming and emulating. Pornography isn't pornography to him, it's fine art. He's uncomfortable and unhappy with his sexuality because he lacks a label for it and doesn't know what it is he's feeling. This is tied to his Aspect of Void; but more on that in just a second.

This is uncomfortable. It is meant to be uncomfortable.

Equius' toying with casteplay and power dynamics is a clear representation of this frayed relationship - and it also segues into our point about his lack of self-worth.

Equius, the Heir of Void.

The Void Aspect. The Aspect of irrelevance, secrecy, ignorance, simplicity and absence, amongst other things.

The Heir Class. The Class that indicates an overabundance of the player's Aspect that overwhelms them and embodies them.

Equius is he who inherits, becomes and is consumed by emptiness. Because Equius Zahhak does not have a sense of selfhood or self-worth. The inference brought about by his title as the Heir of Void is that Equius is overwhelmed by nothingness.

Combine this with his Dersite status and the consensus on Lunar Sway (Prospit indicating externalisation, Derse indicating internalisation) and you get a very clear image of how Equius' title translates.

An overwhelming, consuming sense of internalised absence and nothingness. This is where Equius' hemospectrum adherence comes in! It's a cover up to compensate for his purposelessness and lack of meaningful identity. He sees himself as being deficient in anything real or of substance, and so adheres to the system placed before him because it is the only thing he feels he understands.

Once again, this is uncomfortable and a real phenomenon amongst teen boys. We see it with Eridan, too; young and confused teenagers with no sense of purpose falling into harmful and bigoted pipelines because they have no sense of direction otherwise.

(In a roundabout sense this explains Tavros' role as well; The Page indicates a deficit in their Aspect throughout the session and so the trolls lacking Breath in the form of directionlessness fits fairly well).

It's almost like watching a young boy fall into the alt-right, or start feed into Andrew Tate-style snake oil bullshit. It's the exact same kind of exploitation on a much larger scale; because it's the whole of Alternian society orchestrated by Doc Scratch.

You know... the Doc Scratch meant to represent online groomers?

So, we've been over about all I can cover about Equius' sexual trauma, lack of boundaries and emptiness/lack of self. So, how does this translate? Particularly thinking on the last point, I'd like to give my two cents about a very interesting headcanon for Equius that's been circulating a lot lately.

Equius, and gender identity.

A transfeminine reading greatly enhances the content of Equius' character, and provides a narratively satisfying character arc and means of development for them.

(From hereon out, I will be referring to Equius by the pronouns she/her).

I've seen Nekropsii sum this up beautifully, and I'll paraphrase this interpretation to the best of my ability; Equius' manifestation of masculinity is akin to a poison to her.

It makes her into a grotesque, testosterone-poisoned freak that physically cannot interact with anything around her without hurting it. It is the metaphorical confusion and fury of dysphoria made literal. It is the emptiness and lack of self that I myself can corrobate as a trans woman myself.

Masculinity is a curse for Equius. Much like quite a few other Homestuck characters (Dave & Jake come to mind), Equius really fucking hates being a guy.

So, this ties into my final point.

How I personally would have developed Equius had she been given the screentime to keep being relevant to the story.

The transfeminine character arc seems obvious. I believe that, if a person would be willing and able to tackle the more obscene and deliberately uncomfortable components of Equius' character, you could make an incredibly raw and interesting portrayal of transition and identity.

What's more; this is corroborated by Equius' closest relationship. Nepeta Leijon, the Rogue of Heart. The girl whose role indicates the ability to share identity and selfhood. Nepeta could very, very easily function as a catalyst for Equius gaining her own identity and being helped through the transition process. It makes an already STRONG and stable moirallegiance all the more interesting and heartwarming to witness.

This is not to say that Equius should not have agency herself, of course; an important part of this development would be the formulation of an independent self without debilitating outside influence. It would be allowing herself not to be consumed needlessly by Void.

Equius, and further relationship dynamics.

Equius' relationship with Gamzee (which I have always read as a one-sided kismesis) is also very important to me. This is not healthy. Equius is using Gamzee as a vessel for her fantasies and lack of boundaries, and through her black feelings she vents out her frustration with her sexuality and intrinsic need to obey and serve someone of a higher caste.

I don't think I need to tell any of you how well that works out once Gamzee goes sober. (I'd rather not dwell on the topic of the Makaras too long; that's something for a wholly separate post - and one that I'm sure would end up being rather scathing towards Hussie).

Finally, Equius' relationship with Aradia. This is also one I feel is unhealthy and once again one-sided. It is the same principle as Gamzee; merely in the red quadrant as opposed to the pitch one. Equius is using somebody as a vessel to vent out her feelings of purposelessness and frustration, and deliberately ignoring the lack of reciprocation.

Both of these connections are similar; and both of them end with Equius getting her shit kicked in.

How one would retool and treat these relationships post-character development is up to them, but I personally think it would be healthier for Equius to step away from both of them. I don't think Aradia would want or need Equius' continued presence in her life, and Gamzee is notoriously terrible at relationships. (We know damn well how a reciprocated blackrom with him turns out, just ask Terezi).

Equius, in conclusion.

That's all I really have to say on this matter; a long-winded and ultimately self-serving wall of text that I'm sure will come off as masturbatory and stupid when I read over it again. That being said, I wanted to lay all of this down in one place.

tl;dr - Equius Zahhak is a complex and interesting character with commentaries on teenage hypersexuality and unhealthy masculinity, and reading her as a trans woman provides an incredibly interesting character arc for her in the long term.

[spanishskulduggery]

Baldur's Gate 3 - Non-binary Translation in Spanish

A while back I had mentioned that when I learned how to change language settings for Baldur's Gate 3, I was curious to learn how they would adapt the non-binary [no binario] option into Spanish since Spanish (like many Romance Languages) is very gendered

What I saw actually surprised me a bit

Usually in game translations with different genders, English tends to treat you as a "they" even though it's usually male or female; and in Spanish most of the lines are gendered, or phrased in a very ambiguous way in translation like speaking of your character as una persona "a person" rather than "he" or "she", or "they"

This is one of the first times I've seen the gender neutral -e endings used in an official setting

-

For the purposes of this, and any future posts on this, I decided I would try to play as a non-binary gnome cleric. I should also mention that when you start up the game in Spanish and you do the character customization, everything starts you with the base word (i.e. masculine by default, or possibly agender but looks masculine)... as in you can choose to be elfo "elf", semielfo "half-elf", humano "human", semiorco "half-orc"... choose between bárbaro "barbarian", mago "wizard", brujo "warlock" and so on

My default character creation screen read gnomo, clérigo for "gnome cleric"

But the way your character is addressed by others is what changes

The first NPC you interact with is "Us" a little brain thing you can choose to help. If you do it calls you "friend":

Nosotros: Somos libres. Tenemos nuestra libertad. amigue Us: We are free. We have our freedom. Friend [nb].

The word used is amigue

For the sake of understanding Spanish grammar, you probably know amigo/a "friend". The G here is a hard G. The gender neutral ending is E... but the combination of GE is pronounced like an H sound in Spanish [la gelatina "gelatin" for example is like "hel-a-ti-na"]. To preserve that hard G sound, you have to add a UE to it... so amigo/a becomes amigue for non-binary

[if you study Spanish this is the exact same grammar you'll see in turning -gar verbs into subjunctive forms; why pagar would turn to pague]

The next person you come across is Lae'zel:

Lae'zel: Tsk'va. No eres une sierve. ¡Vlaakith me bendijo en el día de hoy! Juntes, tal vez podamos sobrevivir. Lae'zel: Tsk'va. You are no thrall [nb]. Vlaakith blessed me today ["on this day of today"; emphatic]. Together [nb plural], we may (yet) survive.

Interestingly, there's first siervo/a meaning "servant" or "serf" or "thrall"

What I found very interesting was that you have une... un and una being "a" are used for indefinite articles; the non-binary form seems to be une

What threw me off though was seeing juntes... now junto/a is "together" [lit. "joined"] but juntes implies a non-binary plural.

I don't know if this is because in Spanish grammar it would imply that non-binary trumps feminine [the way amigos "friends" could be male+female or multiple male, as opposed to amigas "friends" being all female]... or if it's maybe an error or something else; the game treats Lae'zel as a woman in every other regard so I think it's the first one which is a situation I somehow hadn't considered. I had just assumed it would be juntos ...or juntas if you played female

Next I decided to rescue Gale first because he uses a lot of adjectives/professions and I wanted to see what they looked like:

Gale: No serás clérigue por casualidad, ¿verdad? ¿Médique? ¿Cirujane? ¿Increíblemente hábil con una aguja de tejer? Gale: You wouldn't happen to be a cleric, right? A doctor/medic? Surgeon? Unbelievably skilled with a knitting needle?

First is clérigo/a "cleric" being used in non-binary as clérigue. Similarly we have médique which is the non-binary médico/a for "medical doctor"

[just like above C turned to QUE to preserve a hard C/K sound; you'll see this with subjunctive and even preterites of -car verbs... why atacar "to attack" will turn to ataqué "I attacked" and ataque in subjunctive... because CE has a soft S sound in Latin America, and can be lisped in Spain]

And next is cirujane... the word cirujano/a is "surgeon"

Finally important note - hábil being "able" or "skilled" is a unisex adjective, so there is no change in any gender - masculine, feminine, or non-binary

*Note: I did miss it but at some point someone used the article le to describe my character. The el and la "the" are the masculine and feminine definite articles; le is non-binary "the" which still catches me by surprise because it looks French to me

-

I've been told since I made the original post that people have seen the non-binary E ending used in other things, but this was special for me to see. I'm curious how the other gendered languages available treated non-binary options

It was a fun surprise for me, especially for some modern day Spanish linguistics in a VERY big modern game, with non-binary word choices being heavily prominent. It's a bit of a learning experience for me

If I find any more fun examples of NB language being used I'll let y'all know as I go

[findafight]

With the whole "Munson doctrine" bs. Eddie wasn't just against the jocks and the bullies (and there's no proof that he was seriously bullied? Just a bit of an outcast?). He was against anyone that was a part of what he called conformity. In that stupid speech on the table he called out people in band and those who like science for forced conformity. Other outcasts, other people that would have been bullied. Because they liked something he didn't.

It wasn't about self defense, it was an I'm right, you're wrong mentality, that his interests were the only valid interests.

Also, this is why I *hate* the idea of Eddie and Robin being friends or having some sort of alliance pre-s4 (or even pre-s3) because she's in band and likes band and he canonically criticized being in band as forced conformity. Why would she be friends with someone who is so vocally against something she enjoyed?

Oh yes I think Eddie has a bee in his bonnet about people who don't......conform.....to his brand of nonconformity. But I do think part of it is self preservation, or at least started out that way but grew into something else? Eddie is an outcast, has a non-nuclear family, and is poor, and all that shapes his view, but it also doesn't stop him from ostracizing people who he thinks aren't outcast enough or in the correct way (Subconsciously, at least.) Eddie thinks the only way to be a weirdo and a freak is to be loud about it, to be purposely obnoxious, to not even consider the normie hobbies or interests as something worth your time.

But as you've said band geeks and science nerds would also be in the crossfire. Heck, the party are all science nerds! I guess that didn't actually interfere with Eddie's interests though. Until inevitably a big county/state science fair or something would be on Hellfire night, and then it might have (except the Duffers would not have done that because they want to continue the nerd v jock thing happening that's just so stupid). He left Lucas out to dry, what's to say he wouldn't do the same to the other boys?

Part of what makes Eddie a fun and interesting character is that we get a glimpse of him starting to realize the strict us vs them, jocks vs nerds, conformity vs nonconformity binaries he's built around himself are not so clear-cut when he talks to Steve in the upside down. But it took him seeing Steve being a chill and kind guy, as opposed to Lucas who was in Hellfire since the beginning of the year to make him see that. Maybe he viewed Lucas as betraying them by joining basketball, but Steve, moving in the """opposite direction""" away from ""jockdom"" was what made it click for him. Eddie has a lot of issues to work through regarding expectations and nonconformity.

Oh. Yes I don't think, in canon, Eddie and Robin would be friends pre S4. Like I think aus that show us how he works through things (or at least tells us he did) can be fun. But when there's just the assumption that they'd be friends pre S4 or even pre S3 without either of them changing from how we were introduced to them? Uhg. Robin thinks Eddie is an annoying weirdo who stepped on her lunch one time :( and said the band uniforms were stupid and she took offense to that because he acted like it was their fault and not the school's. Eddie thinks Robin is some boring band dweeb and never thinks about her unless it's a vauge sort of "oh she's talking to Dustin" way.

It's also frustrating because Steve is often left behind in these AUs, and Eddie replaces him as Robin's best friend [at least at the start] One of the reasons stobin is so powerful is because they were both lonely losers who happened to find their forever friend in scoops ahoy. Robin having a close friend she's out to before that doesn't make sense, especially since it's heavily implied Steve is the first person she's told, which is why that scene means so much!

[sternenschaukler]

What is Cassgender?

🖤💛💚🩶 - FAQ and more:

What does 'cassgender' mean?

Cassgender is a term under the genderqueer/ non-binary umbrella for people who feel their gender is unimportant or irrelevant to their life. This can include feeling like you have some sort of gender, but it is not something big or important to you.

Being cassgender does not necessarily mean that you don't have any gender at all. It's also possible to feel like you still have a gender to some extent, e.g. you recognize that you're somewhat non-binary/ agender/ demigender/ cis/ trans.. but you don't find it important enough to really "identify" yourself through this.

Cass experiences may include:

- not really identifying as any gender/ not having a strong genderidentity

- feeling like your gender is an irrelevant part of your identity

- Feeling disconnected from other people of your gender, because they put a lot of importance in their genderidentity. (For example they feel very strongly about being male/ female/ agender and not something else)

- feelings of total apathy/ indifference towards gender

- just not caring about gender altogether./ The very concept of gender is unimportant or seems pointless to you.

Some Microlabels under the cassgender umbrella:

Cassflux: The apathy/ indifference towards gender fluctuates.

Cassfluid: Someone who feels indifferent towards their gender, but also knows that their gender is fluid in some way

Demicass: people who partially identify as cassgender but partially also put imortance to being another gender as well

Where does the name "cassgender" come from?

The term "cassgender" combines the Latin prefix "cass-" with "gender."

Latin cass- (cassus/ casso...):

- empty, hollow, devoid of something

- to annul, reject

- useless, fruitless

- to lack

What do the colours of the flag stand for?

- Beige/ tan and slate/ grey both represent apathy towards gender.

- Black for the absence of genderidentity. (This can mean you are genderless (or semi-genderless), not defining yourself through gender, feeling a disconnect from gendered labels and so on. )

- Green for the non-binary spectrum (Alluding to the green in the agender flag. This stripe is also there to include cass people wo still have a gender alongside those who are completely genderless/ unlabeled.)

How does cassgender differ from agender?

While both cassgender and agender involve a lack of connection to traditional gender identities, agender people identify as having no gender at all. In contrast, cassgender individuals may have any gender, or be genderless, but consider this unimportant or irrelevant to their personal identity. (Although cassflux people might fluctuate with how apathetic they are.) Agender people can, and often do, still care about not having a gender.

Do you have to be non binary to be Cassgender?

No, you don't have to identity as non-binary to be cassgender. "Cassgender" is defined by a sense of apathy or indifference towards one's own gender. This identity can be held by people of any gender, whether they are binary (male or female) or non-binary.

How does Cassgender differ from post-modern genders (Pomogender), gender abolitism, gender-fuck/ genderpunk, or similar terms?

- Pomogender people strongly care about not identifying with any existing genders and feel beyond or past gender. Cass people do not particularly care about one's lack of genderidentity.

- Cassgender also says nothing about wanting to get rid of gender as a concept entirely, like gender abolitism does.

- Genderfuck is a culture that has nothing to do with one's actual gender. It's a punk movement that's about actively opposing gendernormativity, resisting gender norms and the like. It's possible to be cass and do genderfuckery at the same time, but the two are not related.

What pronouns should I use?

Cassgender people can use whatever pronouns they like. Pronouns and presentation are not equal to gender. It is possible to have preferred pronouns, or use multiple sets of pronouns, or just accept any pronouns other people use for you.

How is cassgender related to gender dysphoria?

Cassgender individuals may or may not experience gender dysphoria. The key aspect of cassgender is the perceived irrelevance of gender, which can be independent of feelings of dysphoria or comfort with one's body

Cassgender experiences:

(...can, but don't necessarily have to, include: )

some of those points don't really have anything to do with cassgender at all, but are often asked like: "Can I be X and also cass?"

Relatable story by Vilhart: https://youtu.be/hmKix-75dsg?si=F7QJuO-zpjoBt_k2

- Feelings of total apathy/ indifference towards your gender

- Feeling like your gender is an irrelevant part of your identity

- Just not caring about gender altogether

- You place no value on your gender

- Being (partially-) genderless or agender

- You don't define yourself through gender

- Thinking: because of my AGAB or presentation, people see me as a girl/ boy, so I may as well just be that

- you say you're cis simply because it's safe, easy and comfortable

- "What's your gender/ pronouns?" "Meh, whatever."

- You don't understand gender or why gender and the right pronouns are so important to people

- You are understanding and supportive of other people's gender identity, but you just don't get it

- You don't instinctively know your gender

- You feel like it would be better to redefine gender and gender roles in culture

- You do not care what pronouns people use for you

- You do have a pronoun preference

- When describing yourself as a person, words like man or woman are not an important point on the list

- You can't find a good answer to: "I am X gender because..." that does not involve your body, appearance, or stereotypes

- You can relate to a gender to some degree, (e.g. cis, non-binary, trans, agender, demigenders), but don't find it important enough to need it acknowledged, or to want to socially or medically transition be seen as this gender etc.

- You're feeling a disconnect from gendered labels

- You're feeling like an impostor, or like you're not telling the whole truth when you're in men-only/ women-only groups

- You have looked up a lot of different genders, but find it difficult to fully relate to people in the communities, because they often feel very strongly about being this gender

- You feel exhausted if you have to conform to gender norms

- Feeling exhausted with gender in general

- You feel neither gender euphoria nor dysphoria

- You have gender/ body dysphoria

- If you suddenly woke up as the opposite sex, it would be a change, but ultimately it wouldn't really bother you

- You're cassgender because you want to be free from having to care and think any more about your gender

[panda-writes-kpop]

Fluff Alphabet ~ Seulgi (Requested!)

A/N: Hi guys, girls, and non-binary pearls! Hope you all are doing well. 💖

TW: Mentions of food and fights. This probably isn't my best work, so I'm sorry to the anon who requested this - I hope this is as good as you hoped it would be! ❤️

♡ Masterlist ♡

- Affection (How do they show their affection? What love language(s) do they use?)

Physical touch and gifts are how Seulgi shows her affection for you. You always remember her favorite foods, so she has to return the favor somehow! As for physical touch, she clings to you whenever possible. Even when you're moving around the house or are busy with work, Seulgi finds a way to be by your side no matter what.

- Beauty (What do they admire about their S/O? What makes their S/O beautiful?)

She admires your kindness and humor the most. Sometimes Seulgi can be too serious when it comes to her work, and you know just how to bring her back to Earth. You make time for her, despite yours (and her) busy schedule! In short, the traits she finds beauty in are the ones that she loves you for.

- Comfort (How would they help their S/O if they were having a rough day?)

Soft, hushed, reassuring whispers and calming moments between the two of you. Seulgi might be too busy to cook or order your favorite food, or prepare an amazing, mood-boosting speech, but she's good at getting you to relax and stay in the moment with her. That's all that matters to her at that moment. The rest of the world can slip away as you hold her tight, and she does the same to you as well.

- Dreams (How do they picture their future with their S/O?)

Tranquil, domestic bliss. No matter what challenges or issues may arise in your relationship, Seulgi knows that the two of you will work it out in order to stay together in the future.

- Equal (Do they tend to be more dominant or passive in the relationship?)

Seulgi tends to take a more neutral role, and she likes to follow your lead most of the time. If you want to be more dominant, then she's okay with that, but if you're on the passive side, then Seulgi's not opposed to stepping up and taking a more dominant role.

- Fight (Would they easily forgive their S/O after a fight? How would a typical fight go?)

A fight wouldn't go too far between the two of you because Seulgi usually emotionally disengages from the fight in order to not get hurt, or she ends up getting emotional because she doesn't want to lose you. Either way, you end up feeling awful, and you apologize first while ignoring your pride because it's not worth winning an argument if you lose yourself and your girlfriend in the process. Seulgi apologizes as well, and you have a much calmer discussion about whatever you were arguing about before getting something to eat and cuddling for the rest of the day.

- Gratitude (How grateful are they for everything that their S/O does for them?)

Seulgi is grateful for everything that you do, but she does not always verbally express it. Her appreciation is usually shown through reciprocation of your kindness, or physical affection like kisses and back hugs!

- Honesty (Do they tend to keep secrets from their S/O, or do they share everything?)

Seulgi does like to share some things with you, but she also believes that some things should be kept private as well. Although she does not hold you to the same standard, Seulgi appreciates whenever you're honest with her about your intentions, whereabouts, and whatever else you choose to share with her.

- Inspiration (Did their S/O change them, or was it the other way around?)

Seulgi definitely inspired you to try new things that she liked; for example, you got to draw with her for a couple hours, or you spend some time learning some dances together. Even if your drawing could be easily replicated by a preschooler or if your dancing isn't up to par, Seulgi will praise you as if you've reinvented what she's been doing for such a long time.

- Jealousy (Do they get jealous easily? How do they deal with it?)

Seulgi doesn't really get jealous because she knows that you're completely and utterly dedicated to her. She definitely gets anxious when other people flirt with you, but watching you shut them down gives her a strange sense of satisfaction that she didn't know that she needed.

- Kiss (How often do they kiss you? Where do they like to kiss you?)

Kisses on the cheek are her favorite as she's often running off to one place or another and doesn't have much time to properly kiss you. It's like a secret greeting and goodbye between the two of you. It also, as strange as it is, feels more intimate to kiss your cheek than to kiss your lips.

- Lazy Day (How do they like to spend days off with their S/O?)

Staying in, binge-watching whatever TV show or movies you two want, ordering a mix of yours and her favorite foods, and just rotting away on the couch and getting absolutely nothing done yet feeling so satisfied with yourself at the end of your day.

- Marriage (Do they want to get married? How often do they think about marrying their S/O?)

Absolutely, but Seulgi understands that this step is a long way in the future. She'd love to settle down with you someday, but there's so much that she wants to do and she doesn't want to feel tied down by marriage right now. You're so busy with your life, she's busy with hers, and the future is there as a reminder for the great things to come.

- Nicknames (What do they call their S/O?)

Honey, love, sweetheart - anything that shows her adoration and devotion to you.

- On Cloud Nine (What are they like when they are in love? Is it extremely obvious to others?)

She spaces out a lot, and her thoughts quickly become scrambled. Everything is a reminder of you - from the music she likes to the food she orders. Love becomes a constant thought, and as much as she tries to put it aside, it just won't leave her alone. Those close to her will definitely notice that she's acting a little off, but Seulgi keeps a strong enough front that most aren't able to detect much of a difference.

- PDA (Are they very upfront with their relationship, or do they prefer to keep things quiet?)

Seulgi likes to keep your relationship quiet, but that's mostly because she likes to keep your relationship between the two of you. She doesn't like to divulge many details from your relationship to other people, but that's because she's a private person by nature. She might show a little affection in public, but she saves the sweeter and more private moments of intimacy for just you and you alone.

- Quirk (Some random personality trait that makes them an excellent partner.)

She's playful and downright weird at times, but that makes Seulgi perfect for you. Her weirdness brings out the weird side in you, and her playfulness breaks down your walls and makes you more open and comfortable with you.

- Romance (Are they a born romantic ready to woo their S/O at any moment, or do they struggle to spark romantic moments with their S/O?)

Seulgi struggles to be romantic with you, but that's because she doesn't want to make you uncomfortable or weird you out with her flirting. After she gets to know you, she eventually tries and even if it is dorky and a bit cringe, her efforts make you smile.

- Support (How do they help support their S/O to reach their goals?)

Seulgi loves to show you off, even in a platonic way. She brags about your talents and personality constantly, even if it gets a little embarrassing at times. Her love and support for you is limitless.

- Thrill (Do they like trying out new things to spice up their relationship, or do they prefer to stick to a routine?)

Seulgi does like routine, but she doesn't mind you trying to spice things up. If you want to try something new, Seulgi is more than willing to join you. There's plenty of cute couple dates and fun photos to take when you're trying new things together!

- Understanding (How well do they know their partner?)

She has a deep understanding of the little things that other people may not notice about you. She notices your quirks and loves them to bits, just as she loves your strengths and passions.

- Value (How important is the relationship to the person versus other relationships and things in their life?)

Your relationship is important to her, but Seulgi knows that your relationship can't be all-consuming in her life. Seulgi is a woman of many passions and talents, and although she does love and value her bond with you, she needs room to explore and grow as a person and artist.

- Wild Card (A random fluffy headcanon that you have about the relationship?)

She definitely taught you how to do that ghost walk that she does, and now you both freak out people whenever they can't see your legs! 😀

- XOXO (Do they like to kiss, hug, and cuddle you? How often do they do so?)

Lots of affection from Seulgi whenever she can do so. Indulging in you and your love is one of her favorite pastimes. Although it mostly happens behind closed doors, her affection is just as sweet and soft as you would imagine it to be.

- Yearning (How will they cope when they’re missing their partner?)

Seulgi mostly focuses on art and dancing when you're not there with her. Those activities bring her joy, as do you. You'll be back soon enough, and there's plenty for her to improve on while you're gone.

- Zeal (Are they willing to go to great lengths for the relationship? If so, what kind?)

Seulgi is willing to go to reasonable lengths for your relationship, given that you would do the same for her. Relationships are about both partners giving their all, and Seulgi is willing to do so as long as you would do the same for her.

[mxjackparker]

JKR retweeted this. It's titled "The Witch Trials of J.K. Rowling" and has a picture of a bunch of trans people with one holding a sign protesting her as the image for it. Rowling is clearly framing herself as the victim of a witch hunt by trans people.

She has also, of course, engaged in a huge amount of transphobia.

She did so in this piece she wrote, where she repeatedly misgenders the trans people she's discussing and suggests it should be harder for us to access healthcare and there should be more gatekeeping in place. She mentions autistic trans boys and men, calling them "girls", and brings them up to suggest that their overrepresentation is the result of something nefarious. She brings them up and immediately follows with conspiratorial ideas about social contagion from someone else, quoting as if she can get away with saying they're not her own words even though she obviously chose to share them.

Only days ago she retweeted this, which calls the black and brown and trans stripes on the Pride flag "shit" and argues against use of the word queer by queer people.

Rowling opposes self-ID for trans people. Rowling opposes Gender Recognition Reform. Rowling complains about accurate language like "people who menstruate" when discussing periods, out of a desire to exclude trans men and non-binary people who experience periods and to call us women.

Rowling frames affirmative trans healthcare as "conversion therapy for young gay people".

She's transphobic and she's well aware that she is, and the immediate request for examples and exact quotes (of which there are many) is designed to try and get people to phrase themselves imperfectly because she wants to sue them. Even though it would never hold up in court, if she goes after someone for replying to her asking for a "direct quote" or "example" by paraphrasing, she is able to scare them into shutting up.

J. K. Rowling is a transphobe and I won't be bulled into not saying it.

[bloodymoonxvampire]

Felt like I should explain my answers on that last post a little.  So!  Consider this a somewhat thorough naughty headcanon post.

While I headcanon Rei as being pretty much exclusively interested in men, he also habitually uses sex as a tool (and no, we do not need to get into that in this post LOL), and so attraction to the other person isn’t as  important-- therefore, he will still have sex with women.  For the record, his attraction makes allowances for non-binary people who don’t fall too far on the feminine end of the spectrum, as well.  As stated elsewhere on my blog, Rei identifies as genderfluid, and therefore is not opposed to feminine terms or pronouns.

With regards to sex drive, it’s complicated with him.  He’s Ready To Go(tm) at just about any time, given someone else is initiating.  He responds well to others’ advances, nearly without regard to his own mood a the time.  As for himself, he doesn’t tend to initiate often-- when he does, it will almost invariably be with an established, trusted partner.  In a scenario where he’s actually in love with said partner, he actually may have a rather high sex drive.  He likes to be close to his lover.  As close as physically possible.

I’ve said on this blog before that Rei prefers to be the dominant person, and also to take the bottom role.  Simply put, he strongly prefers to be in control, and when it comes to sex, it’s so easy for him to feel used (just as he often does in his non sexual day to day life) that he prefers the role that will benefit him the most.  It’s emotionally exhausting and even a little degrading to him.  Bottoming feels best to him, so he doesn’t feel the need to give that up for someone else.

When he’s with someone he’s very fond of, who he trusts very much, he’s a lot more open to giving up his perception of control.  And if he loves you, he’s happy to let you take the reins from the get-go.

As for the time of day bits, it’s simple: if he’s picky about who he tops for, he’s EXTRA picky about the energy he brings.  Unless you are a very special person, do not try to catch him while he’s sleepy.  Side note: for very, very, very special people who have discussed this with him ahead of time, he’s into somnophilia.  smh some people become a whole different person when in love.

He’s not very loud.  At all.  If he is, I promise you it’s performative.  He does like to talk, though.

He’s still and always a thrillseeker at heart.  He’ll do just about anything, whether he’s really all that into it or not, as long as it’s something his partner likes.  While he does��enjoy blood in specifically a sexual context, it’s really just the sight of it.  He’s not all that pleased to touch or taste it.

And yes, he has a lactation fetish.  Please leave me alone.  My family is starving.

More on that, though.  I think he just, in general... has a breeding kink?  Obviously he can’t get pregnant but that’s really not all that important to him.  It’s not about what’s possible.  Treat him accordingly, if you’re so inclined.  He hopes you think he’d make a beautiful mother.

[cazort]

Hey just a heads up, a terf with the username @/rabid-tarantulas is following you. Just wanted to let you know so you can block if you need

I have a lot to say in response to this ask. So first, thanks for writing and I do appreciate the desire to help.

I am aware of this user, I discovered them through this post of theirs, which was explicitly affirming of intersex openly not identifying on the gender binary, which is something I support.

Now a big comment here, that I'd encourage you and everyone to reflect on: I don't ever like using the term "terf" to refer to people. TERF is an ideology, Trans-Exclusionary Radical Feminism. Calling a person a "terf" is problematic in a long list of ways, one of which is that people don't adhere to the idelogy in an all-or-nothing way. When we call certain people TERFs and not others, it gives the wrong impression that you can cleanly categorize people into the TERF or non-TERF bin. I've noticed that a lot of people who claim to oppose TERF ideology, actually hold a lot of views that seem TERF-adjacent. I can't even count how many times "progressive" people who openly advertise that they support trans rights, have suddenly flipped on me, throwing my pronoun preference and nonbinary identity out the window, and attacking me as a "man", just because I disagreed with something they say. It's like, oh, trans people deserve respect and I'll acknowledge their identity and defer to their pronoun preference but only if they agree with me. Yes, I've had both cis and trans people treat me this way.

But it's also problematic to call people "a terf" like as a noun, because it's a negative label. It's a personal attack. But it's also not particularly truthful the way it is used. For example, I've been conversing with the user you drew attention to here, and they are certainly not someone who fits the profile of "typical TERF" viewpoints.

Over the years I've conversed with a lot of people who identify as radical feminists, "gender critical" feminists (the newer term for TERF ideology used by people who support or adhere to those viewpoints), and lots of others who hold varying degrees of TERF-adjacent viewpoints, and one thing that is clear is that there is a huge range of viewpoints among people who post TERF or TERF-adjacent content. These viewpoints range from stuff that is overtly hateful towards trans people, to stuff that is aggressively dismissing of trans people's identities but not overtly hateful, to stuff that is dismissive of trans people's identities but more respectfully worded. TERF ideology is also frequently associated with man-hating, but the degree to which people get into this varies hugely.

I think a lot of the ideas in TERF are untruthful, and as such I think it's important to challenge them. However I also think some of the disagreements between TERF and mainstream progressive ideologies surrounding trans people, are more a question of semantics or differing definitions than anything else. I also sometimes dislike how mainstream trans activism has pushed ideas into the mainstream, and some of those ideas can be problematic at times too, and just like TERF, it can be problematic how these ideas are advanced.

For example, I know a lot of older trans people who use terms like MtF, FtM, and use language like "I was born a woman / I became a man / etc." and I have seen people who use the newer terminology attack, argue with, and publicly shame these other people, saying they are "wrong" or are promoting "transphobic" viewpoints when they're just using the language that helped them through their journey of discovery of their trans identity.

I get really uncomfortable too with the idea that it's bad to interact with someone just because you disagree with them, and with any sort of social norms that encourage people to push out and ostracize others.

Like the fact that you wrote an ask to me, about a user who has only liked and reblogged a few of my posts, starting in the past 24 hours, makes me wonder how many other users you have contacted. I recognize you are probably trying to help, but I also am not sure that what you are doing is going to be having the effect that you think it has. What would happen if anyone who ever voiced any TERF-adjacent viewpoints, were totally shunned and ostracized by the community of trans-supportive people on Tumblr? It's not going to ban these people, it's just going to isolate them to where they only interact with other people who have viewpoints that are not particularly supportive of or respectful to trans people. It virtually guarantees that these people will become further radicalized.

Do you want to create a world where people are isolated of people into echo chambers where everyone is surrounded only by people who think exactly alike?

I don't. I find this idea horrifying. And we already see this on a lot of the other social media, like Facebook, Instagram, TikTok, and Twitter, where the algorithmic feeds show people more of what they want to see and create echo chambers and reinforce groupthink. And predictably, politics gets more polarized, extremism rises in many different forms. I've seen the shift over the past two decades of my life and it's been horrific. Back when I was a teenager, I could converse with people with a wide range of political views and they'd more-or-less be respectful of me and of each other. Even the worst presidents in my life, like Reagan, were respectful when they talked about their political opponents. Now we have unhinged people like Trump, and people think that anyone with views other than theirs are necessarily hateful people, bad people, and "the enemy". It's terribly unhealthy. And it contributes to mental illness too.

I can protect myself. I block people on this site almost every day, if you count bots, and still pretty frequently if you only count real users.

If a user posts stuff that I don't like, I won't follow them. I don't need to block them unless they're either messaging me disrespectful stuff, adding disrespectful commentary on reblogs of my post, or posting content I find disrespectful or annoying in tags that I browse.

But no, I don't want to block this user, at least not unless they become much more disrespectful to me than they have been. And I would encourage you and anyone reading this to reconsider both the practice of labeling people TERF's, and the practice of encouraging people to block anyone they see voice TERF or TERF-adjacent views. And I'd also encourage you and everyone to introspect and consider whether or not you harbor any TERF-adjacent views yourself, because it's something that, in my experience, a lot of people actually do harbor.

And on top of that I would also encourage you to more broadly, embrace the idea that it is good for people who have different viewpoints to interact. Sometimes people are disrespectful and then you can block them. That's fine. But it is rare that it is in any way warranted to go around warning other users about someone. That would require a truly dangerous level of negative behavior far beyond anything I have seen here.

[axolotlsdreams]

I know hotlines and suicide prevention numbers don't feel like anything right now. But it is so important that we all stay alive. They WANT us dead. Every single person who opposes their worthless values. Those of us who accept that gender is something more than genes. People who only want what everyone else can have, the right to marry another consenting, loving adult and even start a family. Cultures and people who do not adhere to their precious White Anglo Saxon Protestantism. Women who will never submit to men.

If you need to, arm yourself. If they come for you, have some way to defend yourself. It's one of the only rights they've fought for us to have. As someone who now has to live with the fear of not only being SA'd but maybe one day being forced to carry out a pregnancy resulting from SA, getting a license has definitely been on my mind. I know it's easier said than done (and a given) but do everything in your power to get out of the danger zone, mainly the red states, find safer places and safer people (if half the country voted in the bigots, there is another half that didn't). There is safety and support in community.

The fewer Lesbian, Gay, Bi, Pan, Trans, Non-binary, Questioning, and Gender non-conforming people exist in their conformist hole of a country, the happier this new conservative regime will be. When our stories and experiences can no longer be shared, when there is no one left to educate, and when LGBTQ+ youth are left closeted and alone, then they will win.

Please, spread this for those who might need it right now

U.S. suicide hotline: call or text 988 (available 24 hours)

U.S. trans lifeline: (877) 565-8860 (when you call, you’ll speak to a trans/nonbinary peer operator. full anonymity and confidentiality)

Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration (SAMHSA) National Helpline: 1-800-662-HELP (4357) – provides 24/7 confidential support and referrals for individuals and families facing mental health and substance use disorders, including panic attacks and anxiety.

LGBT National Help Center: (888) 843-4564

Trevor Project: Call (866) 488-7386, text START to 678-678, or chat online.

Take care of yourself and each other. Please stay safe ♡

[fromofandfor]

I had an acquaintance once. We called him Badger. Met him the only year I performed in our local haunted house. He'd been kicked out the season prior, an addict struggling to get clean and not yet able to stop himself from taking his anger out on the world. He was the type of guy you'd look at and cross the street to avoid out of fear. The kind you'd expect to rip a book in half rather than read one. But he knew that and felt bad about how he acted in the past matching how he was usually percieved. When I met him, he'd worked hard on himself so he could come back. But the cast, despite most of them being new like me, just looked at and treated him like an uneducated junkie with anger issues and backwoods ideas because he came from bumfuck, nowhere and had a dark past.

i just treated him like a dude. A flawed human, just like the rest of us. He might've been rough and tumble, but his trying was more than the shiny, happy, less self-aware people were capable of. So when he said something dumb, I just conversed with him about it. Gave him space to go on a little rant and express why he felt that way and walked him through other perspectives. Most of the time all he needed was a bit of information. Once he understood, it was like something clicked in his brain and he'd do everything he could to fix his thinking, all the while thanking me for not treating him like crap because of his lack of understanding. It was like watching a baby deer learn how to use it's legs.

My being non-binary confused the fuck out of him, though. He more or less understood trans binaries, but the idea of anything outside of that was like college level physics and he only had third grade math. So I spoke his language. Why give a TEDtalk when I can just say everyone is different, but my flavor of nonbinary is "fabulous question mark" and my pronouns are they/them? He got the descriptor fast ("so fuck it, just... be who you are and screw the ppl who are confused bc them being confused is better than you feeling bad?") but holy hell, he struggled with those pronouns. Oh boy, did they ever fuck him up.

He never stopped trying though.

I've seen this man go stand in the corner and put on his silicone mask to muffle a scream of rage at something small going wrong, but he never once got upset when I corrected him on my pronouns. He always apologized, never turning it into a big deal, usually cracking a joke at his own expense and promising he'd get it right one day.

He never did. We lost him to relapse a little over a year after the last time I saw him, just before the new season was about to start. But he did land on something I hold dear to my heart. Halfway through that season, instead of referring to me with "they/them", he started using "thee/thou". I don't know how intentional it was, but I didn't have the heart to correct him after that. It was thee and thou til the day he died, and those words still make me wet in the eyes.

I know from other friends that he talked about me after I left, that he was sad I didn't come back for another year. They also tell me he was lighter than before. Friendlier, less angry, more understanding. I didn't do that, that was all him. But I know for a fact it was because he felt safe enough to become that person and discover those things. Because I never shit on him for his language, which everyone else always did. What did I care if he was using a slur if he was using it to help himself understand and empathize better, thereby eventually getting to a point where he could understand it was bad and stop using it? If I shamed him for his upbringing and understanding of the world, he never would have wanted to learn or been capable of listening in the first place.

This, as opposed to Brandy, the middle-aged white woman with a full understanding of trans/non-binary, who would use the right language and claim to be an ally yet misgender me on the regular. Usually right after telling me I reminded her of her trans kid as she wondered aloud why they have no relationship anymore (before pinning it on said kid, bc clearly she was a great mom and ally if I was her friend 🙄).

I was never her friend.

"The trannies should be able to piss in whatever toilet they want and change their bodies however they want. Why is it my business if some chick has a dick or a guy has a pie? I'm not a trannie or a fag so I don't care, just give 'em the medicine they need."

"This is an LGBT safe space. Of COURSE I fully support individuals who identify as transgender and their right to self-determination! I just think that transitioning is a very serious choice and should be heavily regulated. And there could be a lot of harm in exposing cis children to such topics, so we should be really careful about when it is appropriate to mention trans issues or have too much trans visibility."

One of the above statements is Problematic and the other is slightly annoying. If we disagree on which is which then working together for a better future is going to get really fucking difficult.

[transblog119]

I feel the most dysphoric when I have to sit down and question my gender.

Up until that point, I can exist pretty happily. I can vibe and be very comfortable with myself and feel sure that I am a man. It's when I have to ask questions like "am I feeling dysphoric" that it induces the dysphoria because if I'm not, I don't feel "trans enough" to call myself trans.

Nothing makes you "trans enough" because being "trans enough" does not exist. It's not a level or a competition. Logically I know this. It doesn't stop me feeling the most unsettled when I have to start justifying my identity.

It's why answering questions at the doctor's makes me feel so overwhelmed, even though they're perfectly valid questions. I know she doesn't mean them as a test, just a way to get to know me and gauge what answers are best to give me so I can get the help and support I need. It still feels like a test. Like when she asked "what makes you feel dysphoric" and I couldn't answer, so I just said some generic answer like my breasts and being called my legal name. Which isn't untrue either. But it felt like answers I had to give to get what I want, as opposed to answers that I feel are true in myself.

I tried to explain seeing some trans people talking about their experience makes me happy but sometimes seeing trans people makes me unsettled. Especially if they're talking about bad experiences.

Like there's so little trans media I can read or watch, because it just reminds me being trans is all I'll be. She understood this to an extent. She understood I was trying to say being trans isn't my personality, it's just a way to express my identity, as nuanced as it is. It's not my entire being. But reading about trans people, especially in ya media, makes me so anxious.

Let me be frank, I completely understand the need for this media. I hope other people can read it and feel seen and feel at peace finding a piece of themselves in books and on tv. But for me, it only reminds me I'm trans. I could never be "truly male". I'll never be perceived as "truly male". It's at the crux of being trans, that that thing, that identity, I so desperately want will always be a little out of my reach.

It scares the shit out of me.

Reading about cis males or even amabs identifying as non binary, gender queer and gender fluid is so much easier. Because I can pretend. I can pretend that's me. Not that it could be me or it might be me but it is me.

The best I've felt reading about a trans character was in Hell Followed with Us. Yes it was gross and had a lot of gore, but at least Benji was just existing. Painfully, I'm aware, but he had so much else going on and being trans was just something he rarely thought about, while fully knowing exactly who he was in his own skin.

How do I explain to people that I feel the most dysphoric when it's pointed out to me I'm trans. That I have no idea what the fuck I'm doing or how to get the help I want. That I'm scared of starting T because what if I'm wrong, when all signs point to I'm right. And then I'm reminded that this is exactly what dysphoria is, and find comfort that I feel this dysphoria. It's like a never ending cycle, and I think this is the first time I can say I've seeked to self harm.

That by making myself dysphoric, I feel comfort feeling that dysphoria because it means I can be "trans enough" to be trans and that's the golden ticket to being allowed to start T and get top surgery and start passing. No one is stopping me from going after those things though. No one by myself, feeling like I can't have it.

But whether I'm trans or decide later I'm non binary or something else, regretting T scares me. But I know I'll always wonder. I'll always want it, I'll always be waiting to feel okay to start it. To be allowed to start it.

My doctor went through all the permanent side effects with me. My voice will change, and I fucking hope it does. I've never liked my high pitch voice. I'll grow infertile. Great, I've never wanted kids, I don't even have sex. I'll grow body hair, which kind of freaks me out, but no more than anything else.

Is it normal to be scared? Is it normal to feel so nervous I'm losing my mind? I see so many trans people excited to start T, and I am too, but are you even a little bit scared? Those people who start later in life, who didn't "know" when they were 12 but only caught on when they were 25, does it scare you? Are you hiding it?

Then I see so many tiktoks (I'm aware I need to get off tiktok) of calling out people for starting T and then being sad they're not an "anime twink". I hate the fetishisation argument, I believe it's really dangerous, but is that me? Will I regret it if I don't like how I look after? I like how I look now, I just wish I was less fem, more man.

And see how I've swung back to wanting to be a man. Of feeling I am one. When I question the small parts of myself, when I pinpoint it down to what I want to look like and how I want to be seen, all signs point to starting T is the right choice. I want a more masculine muscle structure, a deeper voice, I want people to start seeing me as a man, not as this vaguely androgynous being or just a butch lesbian tomboy that wears oversized clothing.

I think I want to skip the next part. Skip to the good part. Where I've been on T for years and my hormones have settled and I've got a scruffy beard and I don't even have to tell people I'm trans anymore because it's none of their fucking business if I am. You'll know me as Sebastian and that's all you'll fucking know me as.

I want people to forget I'm trans, not just to see me as a man, but so they'll stop bringing it up. My mum constantly asking me questions (some are good, some aren't, some are just offensive) my sister asking me who I've told (she's just being respectful) customers at work calling me "that lady" when it's not their fault.

Stop reminding me I'm trans. Start reminding me I'm a man.

[tenobelisk]

so.. i'm taking risks here that i don't wish to explain the extent of, but i'm transgender and very cis-passing and entirely non-medical in my lifelong journey through all of this. there is honestly nothing about me visibly, appearance wise, speech wise, mannerism wise, that would suggest i am anything other than cisgender.

the DOUBT i see in medical and social care worker's eyes , let alone others, when i explain this. the slow, gentle veering toward non binary as opposed to transgender status because "non-binary is a better fit" or "you're still figuring it out" or the evergreen "you're confused". the BIAS involved when finding any reason to veer me away from referring to myself as trans if i am not taking meds or having surgery or doing anything "different" with myself outwardly. listen. the difference, for me, is inward.

it would be so. much. easier. to just say i am non-binary, and i have gained oh-so-delicious acceptance and approval in the past by just nodding and going with it. the alternative has often meant being pushed toward changing my social, consumer and clothing habits. and then hormones and surgery and all the rest. that's just not the kind of (insert gender here) i am.

i have had people suggest it is a "uniquely autistic take" on gender dysphoria. because.. i am also autistic. well, i am also transgender, read the definition. i fit the definition of transgender. read it.

yes folks, i wear clothing and have interests YOU associate with the gender still on my forms. does that mean i must change for your acceptance by matching whatever sociocultural construct you and others are used to? again, that's not me. this movie does not have the ending you expect to get when you buy the ticket.

i've had pushback (putting it mildly), well-meaning OF COURSE, from gay, straight and everything inbetween. when they finally accept i'm not taking meds or having surgery, you see a bit of their belief in my journey fade; their grip loosen on the connection we have. it's a look i have gotten very used to seeing.

i also get perceived as a social threat? by some supposedly welcoming groups? because of the whole wolf in sheep's clothing.. or sheep in wolf's clothing? by having an internal difference i am not wearing bright and loud for all to see.

i say "i'm gay but it's complicated" ..which has puzzled people. but it's accurate. it is nobody else's business whether someone wants to go the medical route or not. i am non-medical not because i am confused, deluded or hiding, or because i am "one of the bad ones" but because, to me, i look like this, dress like this, talk like this and like these things because that is who i am, regardless of whether there is an M, F or a Z on the forms.

i know this post was not entirely on topic, but reading the transmedicalist related post above reminded me of my experience with people who think you need medical change to be something else. you don't. most of society is made up. people can just make shit up and teach it to each other then act if its always been this way. it hasn't. make some more shit up and put your whole heart into it.

trans people, i am one of you even if i look *exactly* like one of them. it is not because i am in denial or hiding or failed to fully own it. it is because this is just who i am and have always been.

ive been seeing a new wave of transmedicalists lately I think we gotta start being vocal again about how nasty they are. you don't need to take hormones or have surgery to be a trans person. changing your name and pronouns is gender affirming care. wearing new clothes and hair and makeup is part of transitioning too. you dont need to pass to be trans, you don't need to be male or female.

nonbinary, agender, genderfluid, genderqueer people are trans too if that's a label they want to use for themselves. and anyone who says otherwise is a piece of shit. it's not "anti-transitioning" to say so, it's anti-telling other people what to do with their bodies. it's pro-minding your own fucking business and letting people do what they want with their gender and treating them with compassion and enthusiasm

[fill-me-with-your-memes-daddy]

Watching the Rise of the Titans movie and I'll be documenting all of my thoughts/reactions here. [Spoiler Warning]

So instead of reblogging every new update, I'm just going to have this post up on my phone as I watch and type my reactions in a bullet list format.

Nari's human disguise is so cute. As someone who does have a cottagecore aesthetic, I want to cosplay her so bad

Are Skrael and/or Belroc non-binary coded? Regardless, I'm also obsessed and I want to fuck Skrael and be Belroc.

STEVE CARING ABOUT JIM BEING HURT YESSSS!!! My god his redemption has probably been one of the greatest there is because he doesn't just suddenly go from being a bully to a completely good person. You can see the gradual shift in learning better throughout the shows which is awesome.

IN NEW YOOOOOOORRRRRRRK!!!!!! CONCRETE JUNGLE WHERE DREAMS ARE MADE OFFFFFFFFFFFFF!!!!!

The mugshot montage reminded me of season 1 of trollhunters when toby and Jim were arrested at the museum.

STRICKLER PUT A RING ON IT??? HE'S THE ONLY DILF IVE EVER ACTUALLY AGREED WAS HOT WYM I CAN'T HAVE HIM??? well I'm still really happy about his arc over the series probably one of my favorite character growths.

Eli my guy got his growth spurt!!! As an 18 year old who is still 5'0", I'm happy but envious for him

So I went into this movie without watching any trailers or promo, but I doubt anything could have prepared me for the existence of mpreg. In fact, I wasn't going to document my reactions until I saw that.

NAMURA!!!!!!!!! MY BELOVED!!!!!! I CAN STILL THIRST FOR YOU WITHOUT GUILT

The coach teacher just called the kids zoomers so I have to dock one point from my final rating just because of that. Unforgivable

Those husky animation models suck lmao

Oh fuck the titans got power ranger zords!!

God why did they include the mpreg??? This movie would have been perfect without it.... After that plot point being revisited only one time I'm already beyond done with it

Like it's bringing me back to the v*ltron days where they're was a suspiciously high amount of klance omegaverse and mpreg fics and art created and it physically hurts because Steve and Keith's voice actor is the same person meaning this is especially cursed to me since I was unfortunately in the v*ltron fandom and remember all of that

But like on another note, how old are these characters again??? I haven't checked any wikis because of spoilers but is Steve an adult??? I know aja might be technically a lot older than 18 because alien but is whatever age she is equivalent to an adult as far as emotionally and physically in Akaridion development??? IS THIS A TEEN (M)PREGNANCY IN A KIDS SHOW????

Like bruh I saw a singular post on here before going into the movie that was like "rott spoilers without context" and there was a pregnant belly but I was absolutely not expecting the actual context of it. I'll find the post after I finish and edit this post to tag the creator right here: @makoden

This entire post is just gonna be me ranting about mpreg huh

Anyway I love the whole roundtable allusion to the legends of king arthur (not the toa version but the one he's based off)

THERE'S 3 TO 5 BABIES????? I need to take a break bruh this is just too much

Alright I've taken a 30 minute break got some food and did some things i love (decompressed by tactile stimming with some owl plushies and watched some videos on my favorite owl, Garu. He lives in Japan with his owner and is a domesticated eagle owl who basically just acts like a sky cat. If anyone else needs some eye bleach, here is their YouTube channel)

Blinky and ARRRGHHH!!! saying their "if one of us doesn't make it" talk my god one of them is going to die I can see it and I will be utterly crushed. Jim can't lose another father figure and Toby can't lose his wingman again I will riot if this happens

On a similar but unrelated to the movie note, can we just talk about how toa started with Jim having 0 dads and (if strickler and blinky live to the end) will end with 2 dads? Like I just really feel happy for him that he has two dads who actually figured out how to put the past behind them to not have any infighting between them so that both of them are healthy father figures. Jim has already been through literal hell and back losing his actual humanity in the process so if he loses one of them, I'm going to be really pissed because at this point, this is just Jim torture porn. Y'all know how as SpongeBob SquarePants went on, the show just became Squidward torture porn? It's starting to feel that way for toa and I really hope they cut the shit by the ending

Jlaire is such a good ship but like I feel like it's too perfect they never disagree with each other

YESSSSSSS Someone finally doesn't treat toby like a fat waste of space who messes stuff up!!! I think out of all the characters that would have been most deserving of a rewrite, it's Toby. Sometimes I just feel he's only comic relief and any heartfelt moments he's had in the series was also born of stupidity (ie his flour baby project being unharmed was seen by him as divine intervention from his parents but was actually just Eli and Steve behind the scenes).

Ohhhhh yesssssss Archie's father!!! I was hoping I'd see him again because we got so little of him last

Ooooooooooh Asian trollmarket!!!!!

Oh never mind slavery trollmarket

Bruh titanic camelot

I feel like we're not seeing enough of the villains because I completely forgot about the power ranger zord things

NAMORA NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO MY LAST CRUSHHHH

STRICKLER NO NOT YOU TOO PLEASE

WHAT THE FUCK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

THE ONLY TWO CHARACTERS I SIMP FOR ON THIS SHOW DIED WITHIN FIVE MINUTES OF EACH OTHER

THAT WHOLE ASS RANT I WROTE IS COMING TRUE FUCK THIS MOVIE THIS SERIES IS JUST JIM TORTURE PORN

WAIT JIM'S SPERM DONOR INFO?

Oh thank God I don't want to know anything about that person

For the record, I call that man Jim's sperm donor because he has no business being called a father to him. All he did was donate some swimmers to the creation of him and give him abandonment issues

Oh another blind troll elder???? This fucker is just if vendel was a bad guy

Bruh I was grieving

PACIFIC RIM WITH GUN ROBOT VEX AND THE BELROCZORD? I've never seen that movie but I know the reference

Bruh Blinky doesn't read horoscopes? Does he realize conspiracy theories are just the manly version of horoscopes?

NO DON'T KILL VEX STOP KO-ING FOUND FAMILY MEMBERS

Oh thank God he's okay

NO NOT ARCHIE AND CHARLEMAGNE OH MY GOD

oh never mind they're just gonna coup de tat I believe in them :))

But I want to see him again

But I'm glad to see vex

Yay they're in arcadia!

But yeah I wondered why the trolls and Merlin didn't keep the whole "daylight doesn't hurt trolls" feature from the eternal night but now Guillermo del Toro I see you were playing the long con in that just to kill my girl Namora :(((

Oooooh I love the animation of the Narizord over Chihuahua!! It looks very good and realistic (if only they could have put some of that into those huskies from before smh)

Bruh the character designs of the arcane order are so good I want to be them

Nari making sure the Skraelzord doesn't crush the bus

DAMN DOUBLE HOMICIDE

Bruh I'm just glad we finally have an answer on why arcadia had everything going on as opposed to literally anywhere else!! I always found that as a weird coincidence for plot convince.

BRUH WERE BACK TO THE MPREG IM SO JEALOUS I FORGOT ABOUT THAT EVEN THOUGH IT WAS BECAUSE I WAS GRIEVING THE LOSS OF MY LOVELIES.

Oh that's real convenient that the ninth configuration meant all of them. Way to not decide which character gets more attention. Though it probably was a smart way to not have any infighting in the fandom between each character's stan group.

Bruh I just realized where is Barbera did they just ditch her on the Camelot ship???

And where are the other trolls that migrated at the end of trollhunters s3? They said something about new jersey but obviously Jim and the other main characters got on Camelot instead.... This feels like a plot hole

And we never learned the process of how changelings are made and bonded to humans and stuff. We just know it's super painful but I'm curious ffs!!!!

THE DONT THINK BECOME HERO SPEECH ALL SAID TOGETHER!!!

BRUH THEY REALLY HAD TO SHOW HIM GIVING BIRTH??????? WAS THAT AN ABSOLUTE MUST??????

Plus the main audience for this series is little children (the rating for the movie is literally TV-Y7) so even though my adult ass is not in the target audience, I STILL DONT UNDERSTAND WHY WOULD MPREG AND ANAL BIRTH WOULD BE AN IMPORTANT THING TO 7 YEAR OLDS???? THIS IS A LITERAL FETISH HIDDEN IN KIDS CONTENT ITS ELSAGATE ALL OVER AGAIN Y'ALL 😭😭😭😭😭

Though it's probably hypocritical of me to think fetishes don't belong in kids tv when I've openly admitted to thirsting for strickler and namora

HUZZAH

NEW AMULET WAZ GOOD????

STAB THAT BITCH JIM

WAIT NO I SAID STAB NOT GET STABBED

Alright good job just missed the directions at first but you fixed it

SEVEN KIDS?????????

T O B Y ????????????

W A I T NO

N O

IS HE ACTUALLY

OH MY GOD THERE'S HOPE

NO THERE ISN'T

F U C K THIS SHIT THEY REALLY JUST HAD HIM TO BE BULLIED THEN KILLED

Y'ALL IM ACTUALLY CRYING THIS NEVER HAPPENS

I NEVER ACTUALLY GET SO EMOTIONAL OVER MEDIA THAT I CRY IT ONLY HAPPENED ONCE AT THE END OF VOLTRON BUT AHHHHHHHH

W A I T

HE'S GONNA BE BROUGHT BACK?????

HOLD UP THEY'RE JUST GONNA BRING ALL THOSE DEAD PEOPLE BACK??????

WAIT IS HE

BLINKY CALLED HIM A SON

HOLD ON IS THIS GOING TO BE A CLIFFHANGER???????????

BRUH THEY REALLY JUST CAN'T END THE SERIES WITHOUT CLIFFHANGERS like there's always an open ending

TROLLHUNTER TOBY????? You know what forget the whole rants I had on how toby was written they just redeemed it all

And that's all! I'd rate it a 6.5/10 because it's definitely the weakest of all the sequels but still had amazing animation and some good plot points. It's just really hard to look over the bad stuff enough to rate it any higher.

[spanishskulduggery]

What do you think of the term "Latinx"? I've known about it from academia, have seen it in the news more often these days. As someone who never heard it used by any of my classmates and others who grew up speaking Spanish, I hate it. It sounds so ugly. Now, I don't know anyone who identifies as nonbinary in Spanish but if they did, I think "latine" rolls off the tongue.

The problem with Latinx is that it's mostly a US thing. People from other Latin American countries look at it as specifically an American thing and most Latin Americans living outside the US will say "We are latinos or latinas"

Some people feel differently; Latin Americans have different opinions on different things just like everyone else, but that's the most common criticism that it's a "gringo" invention

The X doesn't conjugate very well though, and so it becomes a very US-Hispanic thing to say Latinx. I'm not opposed to it in that context, but I do understand that it's not as popular worldwide

But the other issue is that there are certain people who think of non-binary things as somehow being an American thing... like the US just made it up and so they don't think it exists.

It's really the non-binary communities that are shaping that non-binary language.

Some people use the masculine plural because it encompasses everything, but the -e is more common among the LGBTQ and non-binary communities from what I've seen, particularly online. It's a lot easier to see nosotres or vosotres or things like that and people understand the -E and it's easier to pronounce and they understand the E as being unisex and neutral.

The two main issues with that are first occasional spelling changes so you'd have amigo and amiga but then amigue... or something like simpático, simpática and then simpátique. There are those little changes because of how Spanish works that make sense when you say it but I can see non-native speakers being confused if they haven't reached the preterite forms in Spanish or don't know the orthographic rules well

And unfortunately the other issue is people just not "believing" that non-binary things exist, or people who see it as an attack on the language itself. Like in any language there are plenty of "purists" who want to "protect" the language from changes they don't like or don't understand... which is also annoying

[payper-clips]

I debated for a long time on whether or not to add onto this post bc, quite honestly, it gives me a lot of anxiety. No matter how much I tried to put it out of my mind, though, it just kept popping back up. So I decided that if it’s really bothering me this much then, obviously, I need to address it.

I've actually discussed this a lot with some of my friends. We had many conversations about censorship and how it can be harmful. This is especially true right now in regards to politics and the many wars happening around the world (which is another topic entirely that I’m not gonna get into rn). I agreed with a lot they had to say about trans/queerphobia censorship in media: how it can be harmful, how it’s used to oppress and ignore the queer community, and how it can be included in a historically accurate way and then challenged or even unchallenged if it makes up an essential part of a characters personality.

We also discussed about how a fictional character’s views DO NOT equate to the creator’s own, and as a creator myself, this is something I should have considered and taken account of. Part of the issue, I think, is that this was very close to home for me and I wasn’t emotionally prepared for it. I had been so excited to see a non-binary character in the game and then turned around not more than an hour later and got hit with a transphobic boardering comment. I’d never had anything said like that to me before and, in a way, I’m lucky for that. But it also means that I took it too personally because I’d never had to deal with someone’s opposing opinions on non-binary/transgenderism. After I took time to calm down and talk with other people, I realized that I’d done something I would have chided someone else for.

This doesn’t mean I’ve changed my opinion on this topic. I still don’t think it needed to be included in a 4v4/battle royale FPS game. However, I can at least admit now that I see where the devs might have been coming from. Regardless, I won’t be returning to the game, as it now holds many negative emotions for me.

Wow… okay, buckle up bc it’s rant time. 

So for those of you who don’t know, this is Vampire the Masquerade’s newest installment Bloodhunt. It’s a battle royale very similar to Fortnite, but - obviously - with vampires. Now, as someone who has played games since they were old enough to crawl and also queer, I’m used to games - especially shooters - being rather non-inclusive with the lgbtq+ community. This game however, has a genderqueer NPC named Omnis which I was really excited about until the game started to give a few hints that Omnis might not be as loyal to the other NPCs and thus the Player. Which, bummer. A queer character being set up as the villain. Again. But it was more than I expected in this game, so I was still excited about it. There’s always the possibility that maybe I’m looking too far into it, even if my instincts as a writer are telling me that much of Omnis’s dialogue is foreshadowing betrayal. But, again, maybe I’m wrong. Maybe Omnis isn’t being set up as a bad guy.

But this? This is blatant. Maybe it fits this character’s personality bc he’s old as dirt but is it really necessary? In a battle royal game where you’re literally just shooting at other players and there’s only a little bit of plot? No. It’s not. And I, as a genderqueer, felt attacked and degraded by this. Perhaps the developers meant nothing by it, but regardless if there was no cruel intent behind it or not, we are in a period of time where the lgbtq+ community is still seen as lesser and demonized. I understand that yes, genderqueer people aren’t saints. They do bad things too. They can be villains too. But this statement isn’t about character roles. This is a verbal attack against nonbinary and the genderqueer. This is a statement singling out the only nonbinary NPC in the game while saying “I don’t understand or agree with this, so therefore I don’t like it” and “That’s a hassle and it inconveniences me, therefore your feelings don’t matter and I’m not going to respect them”.

This game is still early access, so I hope the devs will reconsider this piece of dialogue and strip it from the game. I will be posting this screenshot and my response to it on many of my other social media accounts in hopes that I can garner more attention to this.