#and jesus which like. it's so complicated
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wanderingblindly ¡ 2 days ago
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oooooooooh omg Paranormal Investigaytion but oscar actually is a vampire (in whatever interpretation you want lol) for the celebratory prompts?? that fic is so funny to me, i love it 🧛💛
it's so funny that you should ask this, because when I originally wrote paranormal investigaytion, I heavily considered making oscar a vampire for real hahahhha. It wasn't until the very end that I made the final call, so here's that scene from a new angle <33 Celebratory prompt list here!
Paranormal Investigaytion: VampOsc Version
He can't wait anymore. Loudly and without a hint of tact, Lando nearly explodes, "You can bite me if you want to!"
Oscar's eyes blow wide. The silence in the wake of Lando's exclamation is nearly deafening, filled only with his racing pulse.
Finally, Oscar manages to string together a few sounds. "I can… what?"
"What you were gonna say, that you're, you know. You can bite me."
Oscar blinks at him, mouth agape. "What… I was – I was here to say…?"
Simultaneously:
"That you're a vampire."
"That I like you."
Simultaneously again:
"What?"
"How?"
Lando stares at Oscar blankly, brain unable to decide which of this realizations was more important: Oscar likes him. He was right. But Oscar likes him, that's – but he's a vampire, it's –
"So you did magic me to get in the door," Lando accuses, pointing his finger like a lame TV detective, breaking down the expert crime.
Oscar looks like he's going to be sick. "I would never – why would you –" He stutters, trying to shove his hands in his pockets and failing, stuck on the knuckles. "Can we, um. What I said, I think that's kind of… important."
"And the vampire thing isn't?" Lando's voice is too loud; Oscar flinches.
"I mean, it is, but –"
"You can still bite me, I meant that."
"I'm not gonna bite you, Jesus, mate. I just –"
"But you like me, don't you?"
"Oh, so now you wanna talk about it?" Oscar finally gets his fingers unstuck, shoving them deep in his pockets, shoulders raised – defensive. His face is hard to read, a complicated storm of emotions that Lando's pretty sure he's never seen before. Stressed ranking high on the list.
It makes Lando's energy come crashing down, nearly manic victory turning into something softer, more gentle. He mumbles, more to himself than anything, "Oh."
"Oh." Oscar repeats, looking at Lando with that carefully impassive face.
Maybe Oscar liking him was another bit of evidence, the final piece to the puzzle. Because if Oscar likes him, and he's the one that keeps thinking about – fantasizing about – Oscar biting him maybe that means…
Lando's eyes blow wide.
"Do I like you?"
"Um." Oscar blinks, stunned. "Hopefully?"
"Oh my god," It dawns on him slowly, so slowly that he'd be embarrassed if it was anyone other than Oscar. "Oh my god, I do."
"You do?"
"I do!" Lando giggles, the rush of finally figuring it out tingling down to the tips of his fingers. In an instant, he's closed in on Oscar's space, throwing his arms around his neck and tugging them close – breathing him in. "I like you, idiot."
"I'm the idiot?" Oscar unthaws at his touch, shoulders relaxing, hands slowly leaving his pockets to cautiously wrap around Lando's waist.
"Well I'm the one that figured out the vampire thing, so." Lando smiles into his neck. "Why're you, like, warm? Not very dead of you."
"That's your first question?"
Lando hums, considering. "No, I've got a better one." He leans back in Oscar's arms, just enough to face him – nearly nose to nose. "Can you bite me?"
Oscar huffs out a laugh, his breath intoxicatingly… vampiric. Or something. Lando will ask about that later. But his eyes crinkle, beautiful and warm and so, so close to Lando's that he just wants to – "How about a kiss first?"
"Bit traditional," Lando pretends to wrinkle his nose, stomach aflutter at the way Oscar said it – voice quiet and low, just for him.
"Is that a –"
Lando cuts him off, tightening his grip on Oscar's neck and closing the space between them – pressing their lips together softly, answering his question without words. And maybe, maybe if he slides his tongue into Oscar's mouth just right, he'll find his fangs.
No one said a kiss and a bite had to be two separate things, right?
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andiv3r ¡ 9 hours ago
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Oh my god I returned to tumblr and everyone seems to like my euclydian genetics ideas post ALRIGHT THEN. HEEHHM. I think I shall Talk also.
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Yeah!! Yeah! Saw a lot of bill fan-siblings that were purple and so I wanted to have that make sense, but I'm also an idiot and made things more complicated than they needed to be (did all this shit with four alleles rather than two because I thought it would be more fun and allow for more variation, and it did... but jesus fuck why didn't I just stick to two).
As for eyes, I'm not sure whether I want bill's eye to be a recessive trait or a mutation, but I'm thinking mutation which is seen as a deformity. Big fan of the idea that euclydians typically have an eye on their side, and that Bill's being in the centre of his body would be considered a deformity or disability (influenced a bit by that one... AU or speculation or whatever it was about Bill being considered blind in his world due to not being able to see from his side).
HOWEVER, I do want to do something with pupil shape and colour, what with Pyramid Steve (non-canon character, I know, but he's really cool and I like thinking about him with all of this) having a blue dot pupil, while Bill has a black slit pupil (although he is depicted in that one "it's for charity" artwork with a dot pupil, so maybe pupil shape varies depending on mood or light like with cats, but pupil colour is actually varied).
Also ☝️ colour dilution + other colours will be fun to add, and I haven't even considered what to do with different shapes yet (because come on, not everyone can be a triangle), but I am definitely going to.
Ahaha i'm so normal and regular <- guy who is currently doing This Shit
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trapper-faggot ¡ 1 year ago
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Feeling melancholy this Christmas Eve
It's my first Christmas without visiting family, and my siblings coming up on Tuesday but still spending Christmas alone
And like. Idk Christmas used to be Santa and church and family and presents and doing things
And all I have left is family video calls and presents
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camgoloud ¡ 8 months ago
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he still has his tonsils. by the way if you even care
#sorry this is fucking UNINTELLIGIBLE but unfortunately i’m still on my bullshit about dr. daddyissues. yeah it’s gonna be all month#i am rotating episode 2.8 ‘the mistake’ in my head at breakneck speed. i am gnawing on it i want to swallow it#oh he’s such a lying liar who lies. charming little bastard. would rather die/lose his license than express one wholly unaffected emotion#‘he thinks not giving a crap makes him like house. like it’s something to aspire to’ quick question HOW serious do the daddy issues have to#be before you start latching on to fucking GREGORY HOUSE as a paternal figure and role model. really#even cameron is not down this bad. even WILSON is not down this bad.#the daddy issues of it all are very understandable though because even setting aside whatever went down back in childhood that shit his#father did to him in seasons 1-2 is SO messed up. jesus#imagine traveling all the way across the world to the hospital your son works in for a consult which confirms what you already knew: you’re#going to die of cancer in like 2 months. making a whole point out of stopping by to visit your son. not telling him what’s going on.#letting him spend a whole episode’s worth of time gradually coming to terms with his complicated feelings towards you (complicated on#account of a whole childhood of objectively awful parenting). the kid finally is able to try reaching back out to you. after YOU initiated#the contact in the first place. how do you react? well obviously by telling him ‘oh sorry i actually have to get in a taxi right now’ and#fucking back off to the other side of the world without giving him a chance to actually talk to you at all and resolve any of the emotions#you just dredged up. oh by the way you still haven’t fucking told him you’re about to die and in fact actively mislead him into thinking#he’s going to have the chance to try meeting with you again next time he visits your home country.#especially fucked up given that the whole reason it DID take your son so long to come around THIS time is that he feels like every time#he’s tried reaching out to you in the past you’ve just disappointed him by refusing to put in the effort to meet him there.#And Now Here We Are Again.#rowan what the FUCK is wrong with you. i want to dig you up and kill you again#house md#robert chase#caseyposting
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whatacreepything ¡ 2 years ago
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tiktok gays when they go in public and see gay people being gay instead of discussing the latest microlabel discourse that was posted from an account called bobthebuildersbignaturals
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feymarche ¡ 2 years ago
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gotta get all my LINCOLN thoughts DOWN while im relistening to this godforsaken podcast. here's just some stupid observations that i wrote a whole thesis about for no reason
here's two things we know:
- lincoln was raised to always be honest about his feelings
-- despite this, we consistently see lincoln distracting himself whenever big, hard feelings come up
after the grant sauce scene outside the classroom in episode 7, lincoln doesn't take the time to process anything that his father has said to him. he asks normal if HES doing okay after the conversation with Sparrow, and then immediately changes the subject and tells everyone that they should ditch school and go to Sonics so that he wouldn't have to think about it.
and hey, that's all fair; that was some heavy shit to lay on a teenager, and he'd need a lot of time to process it, but we see Linc consistently choosing not to process it.
later, during the grant arc on earth, linc chooses to drive specifically because it's easier not to think when he's driving. when he leaves a voicemail to Marco telling him that he might never talk to him again, a really hard conversation for linc to have, linc ends the phonecall saying, 'no, this was a bad idea, everything's fine-- prank!'
(and it's not fair to say that linc telling scary that they should look for her stepdad first is also evidence that linc does this when part of it was a structural thing to mimic season 1's anchor order, but it IS consistent with linc avoiding hard emotions)
and all of this isn't even inconsistent with him being raised to always be honest! linc never had to deal with big, hard emotions like this, he's only ever been super sheltered and homeschooled and safe. if linc ever felt lonely or bad, his dads would find a way to accommodate him through some form of enrichment, and if the enrichment didn't help, matts made it clear that lincoln's favorite time of the day is when he can just be alone in his room in the space under his bed where it's calm and peaceful and he doesn't have to think about anything. linc is honest about his feelings up until they become so complicated or painful that he doesn't know how to be honest about them. linc is extremely blunt up until he doesn't know how to think about his feelings without getting hurt
grant talks about how he worries linc's relationship with soccer is an emotional distraction. he worries that linc is using soccer the way grant used violence to shut down his thoughts. and sure, linc genuinely loves soccer, it's a harmless interest to have (especially when you don't have the opportunity to have many other hobbies), but Grant recognizes that linc is using it as an emotional crutch-- or at the very least worries that that's what he's doing.
and thats the one thing that grant cant really explain to linc as a parent! if grant stops him from playing soccer JUST because he's worried, he'd have to explain WHY he's worried, and grant cant really do that. he can't talk about how much he likes killing people around his son if he isnt sauced.
and with the main big, scary emotion that lincoln faced in his backstory being mr. kicks, i'd bet lincoln dealt with that feeling by doing a lot of the same. distracting himself with soccer or zoning out entirely. i'd bet grant watched linc avoid any and all discussion about mr. kicks and instead focus on getting better at soccer. there's no way to prove that, but it's consistent with matt's character choices.
so here linc is, going through puberty, spiraling into apathy and avoidance and being like WHATEVER and WHO CARES to everything. this most recent episode was the biggest change in his character yet; he gave up soccer, said it was a waste of time, and broke that goddamn pick.
he doesn't really NEED soccer anymore now that he's learned that he doesn't need an excuse to be dismissive or avoidant anymore; he can just do it. he can just say whatever now. he can just brush people off. he can be abrasive and distant, just like scary.
and it's sad because man, he did really love soccer, even when he was using it for the wrong reasons. he really did love his family and friends. he had the strongest values and the strongest moral compass and he really, really believed in being a good person. but now he's having to deal with big, scary emotions for the first time, and he has no way to know how to deal with them, even with all the therapy his dads gave him. agughghhghghg lincoln li wilson
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themyscirah ¡ 1 year ago
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Simon's flash forward of the future being Jess' first appearance... 🤵🏾‍♂️💍👰🏽‍♀️ anyone???
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red-wop ¡ 1 year ago
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Right but as I am writing the Wall E AU I keep finding plotholes in both the film and in my interpretation and god its driving me up the bend
Like- yk how all of earths population is living in space at that point? Thats alot of bloody ships and now I've gotta come up with an explanation for it because they dont properly explain it in the film but then I was doing some research on it and then I found out that in film canon there was a climate disaster which wiped out over half of the worlds population and thats why theres not as many ships,
BUT I CANT BLOODY WRITE THAT PLOTPOINT BECAUSE THE WALL E'S IN MY FIC ARE HUMAN SO THEY WOULD HAVE BEEN WIPED OUT TOO IF THERE WAS A CLIMATE DISASTER
godddd why've I decided to make this fic more complicated than it needs to be its literally Silly Red dwarf guys but Silly Wall E robots, I dont know why ive done this to myself wtf
Anyway I'm probably gonna try and ignore that plothole and let it sit in a corner while I continue to write lolll
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tamarin-opal-eyed ¡ 2 years ago
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OOP Tam's a bun now! Long story, will put in the tags, but aside from an adjustment in name/backstory/colors, she's still the same grump.
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violet-dragongirl ¡ 1 year ago
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Yep I need to take a break, eat, drink, maybe get tipsy, watch some Lupin III Series 5 and chill for second
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autistic-katara ¡ 1 year ago
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why didnt i writr anymore last nigjt i wanna know what happens next :(
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rememberwren ¡ 6 months ago
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Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3
Third time’s the charm. Simon/fem!reader. Handjobs, edging, cumming untouched, thigh riding, femdom behavior, somewhat submissive!simon, literally tried to cure my depression with this (did not work)
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“You said you usually go three times in a session. We should try one more time, shouldn’t we?” 
Ghost looks at you like you’ve grown an extra set of eyes. He shakes his head a little, his eyes hard and disbelieving when they meet your own. “Have I not embarrassed myself enough for you?”
“Not really—? I mean—fuck,” you fumble, running a hand down face. “That didn’t come out right. I just meant that I don’t feel like you have any reason to be embarrassed.” 
He stares at you, through you, like if he looks long and hard enough he’ll be able to see your truth straight down to your bones. Well let him look. He hadn’t exactly bared his soul during the few weeks you had spent discussing this before meeting in person, but he had told you plenty: his issue had cost him relationships. It had cost him jobs thanks to lack of focus. Friendships thanks to neglect. You couldn’t imagine anyone willingly choosing something which gave them so much suffering. His lack of complicity cleared him of any blame in your eyes. 
At length, he must see that there is some honesty in you. Looking like it pains him, he nods his head, hulking shoulders deflating a little. “Fine. One more time. I’ll need a few minutes though.”
“That’s fine,” you offer, and it is, or at least it would be if it meant you both didn’t have to sit in complete silence, Ghost uneager to offer up conversation topics and you too awkward to try. 
He keeps staring at you, too. Or more specifically, your breasts. You’re wearing a simple t-shirt, but the effect is aided by one of your prettier bras. You had worn it unsure if Ghost was serious in his insistence that there would be no sex taking place between you both 
It seemed a pity for it to go to waste. 
“Do you want to see?” you ask him, fingers finding the hem of your shirt and gripping it tightly, folding it a little anxiously back and forth like an accordion’s bellows. 
“See? What? No—!”
“I don’t mind, honestly.”
Ghost reaches up a hand to rub at one eye like a headache is forming behind it. His mouth never abandons its signature frown, even as he says, “If you want? Jesus, fuck. I don’t know. I’m not going to stop you.”
You find that you do want. You kneel up, take the hem of your t-shirt into your hands and work it up over your breasts. For all his lack of enthusiasm, his eyes crack open straightaway and glue themselves to you, widening a little at the sight of your strappy, lace-laden bra. 
“I know you didn’t fucking wear that for me,” he says, sounding winded. 
“I’ll be honest, I thought this was just a ploy to hook up. I wore the matching panties too, do you—“
“Stop—talking,” he mutters, closing his eyes. His hand reaches down towards his (valiantly hardening) cock, but thinks twice, turns into a fist, and comes to rest at his side. “And under no circumstance should you take your pants off.”
“Got it. Pants stay on.”
Ghost sighs. “I’m ready. Let’s get it over with.”
That’s the spirit, you think to yourself dryly. You lift your hand to your mouth, creating a little cup with your palm and to spit in, your eyes locked on his own. You hear the click as he swallows, but it’s progress that he doesn’t cum, right? That must mean that he had experienced some level of desensitization, either to you as a partner or to the specific stimulus or a mixture of both. 
But that’s not how this is supposed to work. The whole point is to help him learn to last when he’s as desperate as possible, hoping that edging when he’s truly suffering will lead to a more satisfying orgasm and therefore a need for fewer of them. 
You lower your hand instead of spitting and grip the hem of your shirt, tugging it off over your head altogether. Ghost can’t seem to find his tongue, staring at you with dark, huge eyes as you reach around back and fumble with the clasp of your bra, but at last that comes undone, and you peel it away from you, letting it join his jeans and your shirt on the floor. 
His eyes rake over your naked breasts, mouth forming a curse that he lacks the breath to whisper. His cock is so hard and heavy that it lays against his belly, thick and twitching. 
You shift and straddle his thighs just proximal to his knees. He fists the bedsheets, abs tensing sharply as he watches you with silent awe and trepidation. 
“What are you doing?” He whispers. 
“Getting comfortable?” you suggest. 
Now you cup your hand and spit into it. Then you offer it to him, holding out your hand expectantly. Looking wary, he leans up onto his elbows, ducks his head, and spits into your hand too, quite delicately for being a giant of a man. 
You take your hand and place it palm down against where his cock lays on his belly, slicking the underside from top to bottom. Ghost groans, a low sound torn deep from his chest. He collapses off of his elbows and onto his back, hands finding his eyes and palming at them again while you slick his cock all over with a delicate touch, barely more than a tickle. 
“Are you teasin’ me?” he grits out. 
“I would never.” The tips of your wet fingers trail down over his balls, tight and drawn up against his body already. He hisses through his teeth, cock flexing. You fight a grin. 
Taking him firmly in your hand, you give him a series of smooth, slow strokes, your hand loose and gentle where it is cupped around him. His body writhes against the sheets. 
“Stop, please stop,” he gasps, and you do, letting his cock fall to rest against his belly with a soft thud. He opens his eyes, takes one look at your tits, and squeezes them shut again. ”Fuck, can’t believe you took your shirt off.” 
“I can put it back on if you want.” 
“Really don’t want that. Really fucking don’t. Just—sit there. Please,” he tacks on to the end like an afterthought. You’re grateful to have received a please at all. He takes deep, slow breaths, his nostrils flaring as he strains for air. 
When he gives you a curt nod, eyes still firmly closed, you reach down and use one hand to grip the base of his cock. The other you place toward the head so that you can softly drag your thumb over the deep red tip, tracing the sensitive ridge and over the leaking slit. He whines, honest to god whines, a sound which you feel viscerally in your belly and lower. You shift on his thighs, wondering if it would be so bad to just straddle one, to get some pressure right where you need it most. It’s not like there’s any sort of propriety in a situation like this. He’s getting his, why can’t you get yours? 
You use your thumb to trace a vein up the length of his shaft and smooth the slick over his tip, polishing it softly. 
“Fucking—! Stop! Stop!” 
You stop, and you swallow an unhappy sound. Things had just been getting fun—for you, at least. Ghost looks like he’s being put through the wringer, redness creeping down his neck to disappear under his shirt, knuckles white where he grips the sheets, breaths rapid and shallow. 
“Fuck,” he whispers. He laughs a little, a self-deprecating, unhappy sound. “You’re too good at that.” 
“Good with my mouth too,” you say on a whim. 
His eyes flash open, wide and surprised (and narrowed in on your mouth), his lips parted in a look of near comical astonishment. His hand scrambles to grip around the base of his cock, squeezing painfully. “You—you’re enjoying this aren’t you?” 
“Way more than I thought I would,” you admit. “An obscene amount, honestly—I’m so wet—“
Ghost releases his death grip around his balls and strokes his cock, once, twice, thrice, quick little strokes as his face crumples, as he gives up on the whole fucking thing. You can see it in his face, the defeat, the submission. He’s going to jerk himself off to a quick, unsatisfying release—but it doesn’t seem fair. 
“Stop,” you hiss, reaching out to grip his wrist. He lets go of himself like he’s been burned, immediately obedient even as his face twists with fury. He pulls away from your touch but watches as you shift until just one of his thick thighs is between your own. 
You give a soft, gentle sway of your hips against him. His face is so fucking expressive, his eyes and brows and mouth telegraphing his every little thought and feeling. He watches you with something like tortured awe, eyes flickering towards where your clothed pussy rubs against his bare thigh. 
“Don’t touch yourself,” you breathe, pleasure zipping up your spine at the friction against your cunt. “I want to see if you can cum like this.”
“Came went you spat in your fucking hand,” he breathes, abs tensing, cock twitching as precum pools in his happy trail, watching as you get yourself off against his thigh. “Can cum like this no fucking problem.” 
“You’re not as sensitive now,” you pant, planting a hand against his tensed chest to gain the leverage you need to lengthen the rolling of your hips. 
“Am too.”
“We’ll see.”
His face twists. “Will you—keep going? Even if I do?”
You consider for a moment and then shake your head, breaths too shallow to make words properly. You feel saturated, swollen and sensitive. Every drag of your hips sends muted pleasure up your spine. Normally this would take you ages to cum, but you haven’t been this worked up in a long time. Watching Ghost’s cock turn shades of red and plum is like live pornography, obscene and arousing. Feeling a little cruel, you tell him: “Gotta hold it.”
He tenses his thighs, heels digging into the bed. It does something to the muscle pressed against your cunt and makes your nails dig into his chest. 
He’s shaking his head. “No. Negative. Can’t.”
“Hafta.” 
“Can’t—fuck, I—“
“Goddamnit Ghost,” you whine, hips working feverishly against him. “Hold it and let me cum.”
He really can’t—really and truly. His cock spurts against his belly, a pitiful amount of pearly cum as he groans low and long, moan forming half-hearted, breathy apologies: sorry, ‘m sorry, couldn’t hold it—
You groan, a sound more frustrated than aroused. Your hips slow and stop, and your mouth fights to make a pout. You will it away. It really isn’t his fault. 
“You…you don’t have to stop,” he says, a little shyly. 
You shift off of him and swallow your own sigh, feeling sticky and unsatisfied. “It’s okay,” you reassure him. “Maybe next time I’ll get my pants off.” 
His cock, spent, still twitches against his belly. 
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bigfatbimbo ¡ 6 months ago
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Take a Bite
1.5k words,, Bill Cipher x Reader
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summary — Bill and the reader have sex, which has proven to be very difficult seeing as he isn’t doing anything, and, of course, things are never easy with that insufferable brat.
warnings — SMUT, bill being annoying and toxic, dom!reader, sub!Bill, heavy pain kink, bill’s human form, the fat fuck not the twink
a/n — Admittedly, this fic only happened because I never see Bill sub in fanfics and i’m very interested in what the dynamic would be. You’d be like… domming with a risk of death.
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“Well, slick,” Bill leaned back and gestured up and down his body, “Give it your all.”
Amusement was thick in his voice, along with bubbling giddiness. He fumbled with the seams on his pants, not out of nervousness, but as if he had forgotten how to take them off and was looking for some kind of zipper. One, admittedly, that he would not find on slacks. 
“Wow, human clothes are just as bad as the fleshbags. So needlessly complicated,” He sounded on the verge of a laughing fit, “Oh, and toots? Before you dig in, remember to leave marks. I wanna see how durable this thing is.” 
His amusement was not matched on your part. The situation invoked dull curiosity at best, in your opinion. The idea of harboring a wanted criminal, ex-overlord, god-like demon in your house challenged your idea of a good time. Having sex with that demon was even harder to swallow.
Then again, any situation with bill warranted an ungodly amount of stress. 
“Whatcha’ thinking about over there, sweet-cheeks?”
You smiled at that; of the few advantages you have, being in gravity falls for weirdmageddon proved to be one of them. You know of his powers, and with that, vague guesses on how to prevent them.
Tinfoil-lined bobbie pins were one of them. A guess, granted, but a good one at that. Really, not that complicated when you recall every alien movie you’ve ever watched. 
“Upset you can’t tell?” 
He laughed, “Upset for you, maybe. Trust me, it’d be so much easier for both of us if I could just read your thoughts. I’m already your roommate, how much closer could we ge- Ah.”
You brushed his pants crotch, and began to unbutton. For all his mightiness, the guy couldn’t work pants. “Careful, human body’s are touchy.” 
“Touchy,” He repeated, “Tell me about.” 
Getting his pants off was a task harder than it should have been, no thanks to Bill, who seemed to have taken to just lying there, occasionally flicking you, and then himself. 
When you finally peeled all of his clothes off, you warned him to brace himself, to which he ignored you. On top of that, the entire time Bill had been talking, droning on about ‘the last time he’d been in a human body.’
You wondered vaguely if he’d ever done this with someone else. In the time he’d been at your house he’d mentioned some ‘sixer’ ex-thing-ish of his. But you doubt he’d done anything with him.
As he’d mentioned, he hadn’t perfected his human form until very recently. Perfected is a strong word, he was pudgy and short, remanisent of a human peanut. And his teeth were terrible. 
Either way, you’d gotten him ready, and began your work. Laying a light finger on the tip of his dick, and running it down the base of his length, you got Bills first reaction: a short sniff.
Recovering fast, he adjusted his seat, “Yeah, tick tock, toots. This better be good.” 
It was his idea, you thought, but continued. Your fingers wrapped around the entirety of his cock and you began to stroke it. 
A sigh left Bills mouth, “Oh, this does have a kick to it. Maybe you’re not so bad, after all.”
Over the course of the next few minutes, you’d grow angrier and angrier. Although you were clearing making him feel good, he’d never shut his snide mouth for two seconds. 
“Jesus, slow down, pal— I just perfected this flesh-bag, at this rate your gonna break something—“ 
You didn’t realize how much your hand sped up. You thought for a moment, before completely stopping. Bill looked taken aback.
“Hey! what’s the—“
Without warning you grabbed his dick with full force and squeezed. He yelped, before giggling at the hurt.
This made you more mad, “God, do you ever shut up? I wish you’d lost your voice when you lost Gravity Falls.”
He stopped giggling. “I’d watch what you say, if I was you, kid.”
You threw your head back and laughed, running your hand slowly up his dick and then slamming back to the base of his cock. Finally, a reaction other than knowing bliss: anger. Weakness.
“Oh dear god, rearrange the features of my face then, Billy. See if I give a shit when you don’t have a place to live.”
His face turned red with rage, and he recoiled at the mention of your upperhand. And then, finally, at the slowing of your hand, a small, wavering whimper. 
You both caught it, and he was quick to put a hand of his mouth, “Sensitive human bodies - Hey, don’t look at me like that, that was not my fault.”
“God, you’re such a brat.”
“Oh please, what are you gonna do about it?” And he was completely serious.
Without much hesitation, you took the moment as an opportunity to abruptly sink yourself onto his dick. He sucked in a breath but you didn’t give him much time to do anything else.
“Ah- Now we’re talki—“ You slapped him hard across the face, and grabbed his cheeks with your hand, squishing them together, mockingly. Stifled laughter from Bill. 
“This is the form you spent all that time perfecting? I can barely feel anything. It’s worthless!” You sped up riding him, loosening your face to give the illusion you were bored, “You’re worthless.” 
His eyebrows arched down and his eyes widened, “I can kill you with a snap of my fingers! You think I need this sex— You think I need this hous— ah, ah—“
The unknown pleasure was getting to him, making his brain foggier than usual, and it was showing. Human senses were a key factor in your ability to keep the high-ground. Just as long as it felt good enough, he wouldn’t go back to his original form and… well. 
You wondered vaguely if you were actually going to be in mortal parole after this. But then again, the look on his face was almost euphoric, despite the anger. Thankfully, Bill was selfish, he’d probably chase the high again
You sighed, “Oh, you do need this house, Billy. Where else would you go? Everyone else in town has already forgotten about you, and your little maniac friends are no where to be seen.”
You sped up once more as your hands danced up his body, and continued, “With this whole out-of-sight-out-of-mind routine, i’m giving you something you won’t be getting anywhere else: attention.”
“You— Ah, curse this feeble human body! I’ll make your life a living hell-“ He whined, actually whined. 
Slamming yourself down on him, he cried out and then scowled. You raked your nails down his chest, deep enough to bleed, drawing out a  giggle from Bill as he felt the littlest bit of blood start to pool.
“You’re lucky this meatbag is— ah— funny enough—“ He was cut off with a gargle as a your hand sharply wrapped around his throat, and squeezed tight. 
“It’s not luck, i’m good at what I do, Billy. Not that you would know what that’s like, you pathetic shitbag,” although that insult wasn’t particularly true, you didn’t give him a chance to snap back, and instead put your other hand on his neck as well. 
You rode him with more speed than ever now. His eyes fluttered open and shut slowly, and he leaned into your hands. 
His face flushed, but a dreamy smile spread to the edges of his face as you made sure to leave bruise marks on his throat, still slamming against him. 
Although, you didn’t want to actually break him, so when his face began to turn purple, you let go. He gasped for air and let out a raspy, crazed giggle that went on for too long, and ending in a moan.
“I’m— “ Bills eyebrows furrowed, as if he was trying to decipher what the amusing thing the human body had planned next, “Somethings— somethings happening.”
His voice was broken, neck bruised, cheek red with a slap mark, eyes foggy, and chest bleeding from your nails. 
Before you dig in, remember to leave marks. I wanna see how durable this thing is.
Clearly you’d kept your end of the deal, and from what you’ve gathered it was time for the finale. You chased your own climax now as well, even though, admittedly, you hadn’t been thinking about it the whole session.
Annoying as it was that Bill still managed to make something all about him —and he definitely knew, mind reading or not— you still kept up your pace. 
“You’re close?” 
He smiled blissfully, and nodded.
What the hell. You smiled, “Good boy.”
His reaction was… startling. He leaned his head back, let out a small half-whine half-laugh, and arched off the bed. Finally, he released.
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youraverageaemondsimp ¡ 8 months ago
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Metanoia ;
Aemond Targaryen x Transmigrated!Strong!Reader
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>> Chapter I : The Beginning.
Summary: "Be careful what you wish for" is what everyone says, you realise that you should've taken them seriously when you find yourself reincarnated as a character in the show who never existed.
WARNINGS: CANON TYPICAL INCEST, CONTAINS SPOILERS OF F&B, S1 AND S2, reader's appearance isn't described, only the fact that she is a strong, you can imagine her however you like, the picture used in the header is only to capture the feel of the story. A/N: divider credits to @cafekitsune
masterlist // next
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“Jesus Christ, fuck this show, fuck everything, what the fuck is wrong with the writing?” You exclaim in annoyance after witnessing the scene that was supposed to be heavily impactful be butchered.
“That is the most anticlimactic death scene I've ever witnessed, this has to be a joke.” You furiously ramble. You decided to give House of The Dragon a try after your friend had recommended it, the show currently has released three seasons, with the fourth season in production, you thoroughly enjoyed season one and decided to binge all the seasons.
However, everything started to go downhill from season two, yet you still decided to watch for the sake of your favourite characters, daemon and aemond, only to witness the battle that was supposed to be intense and stressful get finished in the span of two minutes.
You stared at the screen, rolling your eyes in annoyance as you witnessed Aemond falling into the lake along with Vhagar, Daemon was knocked off Caraxes too and fell to his death.
They wrapped up the battle in mere moments, which made you angry as you were so hyped up to see them fight.
“Ugh, I never hated a show more than this, waste of my time, they did season one so well, what happened to rest? I did not expect this.” You sigh in frustration, feeling like you just wasted your time.
“If only… If only I ever get a chance, I'd change entire plot and script because fuck this.” You lay down on your sofa, staring at the ceiling, the show still playing in the background. You recollected the entire plot in your head, thinking of every moment in the show, trying to come up with an easy solution.
“If only they had married Jace to Helaena, it would have been peaceful.. Or at least if they had an older daughter married to Aegon or Aemond.” You mumble, but then shake your head, “What am I saying? Things still would've been complicated anyway.” You wonder in disbelief at your own words.
You yawned loudly, stretching out your limbs and blinking your eyes rapidly, your vision began to get blurry and you sighed in content, finally willingly wanting to sleep after you forced yourself to stay up all night to binge the series.
Your vision darkened slowly as you closed your eyelids, head spinning as you took slow breaths of air, cool breeze brushes past your cheeks and before you know it, you're slowly succumbing into slumber.
You blink your eyes open, realising you fell asleep, you sigh stirring on the soft sheets, entangling them between your legs.
Soft sheets?
Your sofa doesn't have any sheets.
You quickly blink again, taking the note of a translucent veil hanging from above, surrounding the bed you're in, creating a curtain around your bed.
Why were you in bed?
You sit up looking around, taking in your surroundings, your eyes widening in fear as you don't recognize this room at all, ancient tapestries, brown wooden furniture, and the source of light being only from the candle.
Have you been kidnapped?
You look down at your body, noticing you are in a white nightgown instead of the shorts you fell asleep in. Your heart begins to race and you panic, unable to understand where you are or how you got there. You steady your breathing, wondering if someone kidnapped you to play a role in a mediaeval film of theirs? But why would anyone do that?
The sound of metal clanking harshly against the floor and a small scream made your head turn the direction it came from, the liquid in the decanter spilling out rapidly as the person behind the fallen cutlery stood in shock.
“The princess is conscious!” She yells loudly before turning around and running out of the room in a hurry.
Princess?
Is this a prank?
You barely have any moment to think when you hear the sound of multiple footsteps coming from outside to your direction, you could almost feel the ground rumbling, noting that everyone was rushing to this room.
You push the veil to the side and stand up, getting out the bed and examining your surroundings, looking at the sigils and the paintings. All of this looked familiar somehow.
A small gasp echoed through the room, coming from the entrance, which made you turn around to take a look at who was in the room once again. Your eyes widened at the sight.
A lady with platinum blonde hair, blue eyes stood in front of you, someone who resembled Rhaenyra and next to her stood Jace and Luke breathing heavily, looking at you in shock.
Did the house of the dragon cast kidnap you to play a prank on you?
That sounds too unreasonable.
“Oh my sweet daughter!” Rhaenyra rushes over to you, embracing you tightly, tears flow down her cheeks as she peppers you with kisses “I-i i cannot believe this, you finally woke up after many years.” She sobs, you look at her questioningly. “Sister.” Jacaerys speaks up, coming to you and joining the embrace of you and Rhaenyra, Luke joins in as well.
“We missed you.” Jace says and you stare at all of them confused.
This has to be a joke.
They notice the expression on your face and their faces immediately drop, “Your grace, the princess woke up after many years, she might not be able to recognise you.” The maester chimes in, Rhaenyra nods, sniffling yet understanding your condition.
“Emma? Is this a joke?” You question, referring to the actor of Rhaenyra, “I’m not Aemma darling, she is your grandmother.” Rhaenyra corrects you. “I think she must be confusing the names of everyone due to her hazy memory.” The maester tries explaining, you sigh.
Yeah this must be a dream.
You shake your head gently and immediately slap yourself to wake yourself up.
“Ouch!” You yell in pain, cupping the cheek you slapped yourself on, Rhaenyra is mortified and the guards rush in and hold your arms back so you don't further hurt yourself.
This is not a dream.
You can’t feel pain in your dreams and you will wake up right before impact.
You look at Rhaenyra’s face, she is as real as a living person, standing right in front of you.
She looks just like Emma. of course, after all Rhaenyra is indeed played by them.
But this is not them.
She is not Emma
You can feel the vibe, it's very different.
You’ve met Emma before in costume, yet they did not give off the vibes as what Rhaenyra is giving off right now, after all, when you met them; it was just a show, but now it's your reality.
Did you die in your world?
You’ve definitely transmigrated into this show, but as who?
Did Rhaenyra ever have a daughter? You knew she didn't.
“Mirror, get me a mirror.” You ask and they look at you questioningly, your form begins to shake as the realisation is too overwhelming, there are many questions in your mind, “Please!” You cry, and immediately a servant moves and rushes over with a mirror.
Your eyes widen.
It's you.
You had not become someone else, but you remained as yourself. “What is my name?” You ask, “Y/N.” Rhaenyra replies. Your mind begins to spin, you are in another world as yourself, you have not possessed anyone else, which means your body must’ve disappeared from your world.
You try to stay calm in this situation, breathing heavily, “You are?” You ask, wanting to reconfirm, you watch as Rhaenyra's face crumples into that of a sad face, probably feeling hurt that her own daughter doesn't recognise her.
“I'm your mother, you are my eldest daughter, they—” She points at Jace, Luke and Joffrey, “—are your younger siblings.” You turn towards them.
You nod, pretending to play the part while you figure out everything. “I'm sorry, I do not remember.” You apologise and Rhaenyra shakes her head, “It is alright, you have been unconscious since the past six years, this is better than losing my daughter.” She replies.
“Six years… Did I fall unconscious after Aemond lost his eye?” You think out loud and Rhaenyra looks at you in shock, “You remember him?” She asks and you clear your throat, “It's hazy, my memory.” You answer back.
“Your grace, the event was probably traumatic for her, hence why she can remember it in parts.” The maester explains it to Rhaenyra, you mentally thank the maester for covering up for you always.
You noticed how they were all dressed up, looked as if they were about to leave but their plans were cut short, and you recognize this gown of Rhaenyra.
It was the gown she wore when she left for King's Landing, in order to settle the matter of Luke's right to driftmark. “You guys were departing somewhere?” You ask, wanting to really confirm it, “Hm? Huh, Yes, We were about to leave for King's Landing.” Jacaerys answers your question.
“Can I tag along?” You blurt the question.
“.. Tag along?” Lucerys repeats your words in confusion, your language confusing him.
“I mean to say, can I come along?” You ask the question in a proper manner, Rhaenyra shakes her head, “No- you've just woken up, you might still be weak- I cannot risk-”
“Mother! I am perfectly fine!” You cut her off, breaking free from the guards hands and running around the room, doing jumping jacks, showing her that you aren't weak and are perfectly capable of physical activity.
Rhaenyra watches in shock, seeing you move like this but she chuckles, shaking her head in comic disbelief, “I guess she has not changed after all.” The maester comments which makes Jace and Luke smile.
“Very well, Pack the princess’ belongings, and get her ready for departure, we will depart two days later.” Rhaenyra orders the maids and you smile at her.
“But mother, I do not have many dresses—”
“You do, I had them tailored every year, whenever you grew, hoping that you would wake up.” She replies softly and you just then realise how Rhaenyra loves her children.
“The maesters said that you might not ever wake up, and that your body will be stunted from growth, yet… I'm glad their predictions never came true.” She smiles gently at you, you smile back.
The maids come in with a bath as everyone leaves, some of them begin packing your belongings. You notice how your body doesn't look how a person in a coma state should be looking especially in the mediaeval times, but instead you seem to be well taken care of, treated as if you were alive.
The maids quickly finish your bath and dress you up, you have to pretend to get used to this atmosphere and era even though you're highly uncomfortable, the mere thought of having servants made you feel bad.
And with that, the night fell, you couldn't sleep thinking about how you're going to deal with everything, could you really prevent war from happening? It happens due to a misunderstanding in the show right? What if the misunderstanding doesn't occur? Your mind was filled with such thoughts through the whole night.
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In King's Landing.
“My queen, Rhaenyra, has sent a letter saying that their arrival will be delayed further.” The master sums up the contents of the letter in the council room, in front of Aemond who had been called by Alicent for an urgent matter.
“Why so?” Alicent asks, furrowing her brows.
“Princess Y/N had woken up from her unconscious state.”
An ear piercing shattering sound of glass is heard through the entire room, when turned to look at the origin, It is known that Aemond had dropped the wine glass he was drinking from.
“Y/N is awake?” Aemond asks the maester.
“Yes my prince.” The maester replies.
Aemond's heart begins to pound in his chest loudly, his mind spiralling at the thought of you finally waking up all these years later.
“Please excuse me.” Aemond gets up from the chair, excusing himself from the council and leaving the room, his brain occupied with the thoughts of you.
There wasn't a day where Aemond hadn't thought of you, he would at least think about you once a day- the news of you waking up from unconsciousness made the adrenaline in his body rush.
He felt like a hungry snake that had been starved for many years who at last found a prey to feast on, he felt like a drought-stricken land finally receiving rainfall, he felt like a garden void of any flowers which started to bloom once again.
He was thrilled.
He reminisces of the fond memories you both shared, he could never ever forget them, smiling at the thought of you.
He wondered if you had changed or remained the same.
Whatever it was, he couldn't wait.
He couldn't wait to receive you.
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woso-dreamzzz ¡ 5 months ago
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Read II
England Lionesses x Child!Reader
Mary Earps x Child!Reader
Summary: There's a reason you don't have sugar
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You hold reading lessons every day at camp because you want the rest of the England team to not be knuckleheads anymore and to prove Mikey from school wrong.
It's not easy to learn how to read so you know you need to come back to make sure everyone has been keeping up with their learning because that's what Mummy and Daddy do to you.
They started teaching you how to read very early so you were fairly advanced when you went to school.
You think Mikey's just jealous because you're a good reader and he's a bad one but, still, you want to make sure to prove him wrong.
Mary always says the best revenge is proving haters wrong. You don't know if Mikey's a hater but you'll assume he is because better safe than sorry.
You've done a good job at teaching everyone though because Maya, Millie T and Tooney all give you some sherbet sweets. They make your mouth go a little tingly when you try them but you like that feeling so the three of them keep feeding you more.
They're responsible for you while Mary's getting the last bit of treatment before you all get on the coach to go to the stadium. Usually, someone else is responsible for you but you did a quick reading lesson for Maya and Millie with Tooney as your assistant so they're supervising you before the journey.
You decide that you really like the sherbet straws they give you and Maya dares you to see how many you can finish before you have to go.
You don't count but it's definitely a lot.
Enough for you to feel super hyped when you're finally reunited with Mary. She's picked out a set of four seats with a table and she's already got your rucksack full of books open for you to pick from.
You're very advanced in your reading for such a young kid but even you struggle a little bit. Now that you've taught Mary to read, she can read very well from the books that are a bit too complicated for you right now so she's in charge of reading them to you as you drive to the pitch.
"Er..." You say as you look at the selection," That one."
"Alright," Mary says, cracking open the book and clearing her throat. She gets about halfway through before she notices how wiggly you're being. "Hey, rugrat, do you need the toilet?"
You frown. "No. Keep reading, Mary."
"Are you sure? I can take you."
"No, Mary. My book, please."
"Alright." Mary keeps reading but she's acutely aware of the way you keep wiggling in your seat.
You seem to think you're fine though. Or, at least, you don't think you need the toilet which is Mary's main worry.
"Okay," She says finally," Go and find someone to hang out with. I need to talk to Tooney."
You seem all too happy to scamper off, practically throwing yourself at Beth across the aisle.
"Tooney!" Mary snaps, interrupting the conversation she and Alessia are having.
"Jesus, Mary! You scared me there!"
"What did you give my sister?" Mary demands," She's never been like this before."
"Like what?"
"Like that!"
Mary points over to where you've decided it's a funny idea to crowd surf over the girls at the front, who are bouncing you a bit as they pass you off to the girls sitting behind them.
"She doesn't do that! She's also not wiggly on the bus! What did you give her?"
Tooney winces. "I gave her nothing!"
Mary narrows her eyes. "What did you let Millie and Maya give her?"
Tooney's eyes dart to them quickly before she clears her throat. "I've got the right to remain silent! Anything I say or do can be used against me in a court of-"
Mary's already moved off before Tooney can finish and she crosses the coach to confront the other two. "I'm not interested in excuses. Tell me what you've given my sister."
Her gaze is clearly intimidating because Maya and Millie fold instantly and Mary's on her way back to her seat, easily plucking you from someone's arms to set you back down next to her.
It seems most of the sugar rush has disappeared now but then another problem makes itself known.
The bus goes over a series of bumps and you make a little aborted movement forward.
Mary recognises the action and whips out a plastic bag. "Here, rugrat," She says," Let it out. Let it all out."
She rubs your back as you throw up. It takes a lot longer than usual to hurl up your guts and Mary narrows her eyes over the top of her seat to look at Millie and Maya.
This is all their fault, Mary knows it.
It's because of all of the sugar you've consumed that you've thrown up so bad and, as she ties the bag shut, Mary briefly contemplates throwing it at Millie and Maya.
"Juice, please," You say and Mary hands it to you," Sorry, Mary."
"It's okay," She says," It's not your fault. Do you want to continue your book?"
You nod, leaning against your sister, energy drained. "Yes, please."
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appocalipse ¡ 6 months ago
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doomed plans : ̗̀➛ eddie munson
you and your ex, eddie, are trying to be "just friends". it's harder than you thought it would be. | exes to lovers, suggestive but no smut, 2.2k words
"Fancy seeing you here."
His tone is jocular, but the comment is more of an understated question than a simple greeting. There's no mistaking it—he's pleasantly surprised to see you here at this party.
He looks good.
Eddie Munson looks really good.
Or maybe it's just that being around him makes you feel good, after too many weeks of forcing yourself not to miss him. "Fancy seeing you, too," you respond. "Funny how Nance forgot to mention you'd be here."
A playful glint lights up his eyes as he sidles closer, a smile tugging at the corners of his mouth—and the expression is so familiar that your heart leaps before you can think to tamp it down.
"Ah, well, I have a theory about that, actually."
"Do you?"
He gives an energetic nod. You're still trying to muster a casual air, despite the surge of...whatever the hell this is that's hitting you right now; a rush of emotion that's just different enough from mere nostalgia to be unsettling in its intensity.
"I do," he says with another nod, this one emphatic. His smile broadens as he peers down at you.
Oh, Jesus Christ. His grin. The warmth of it. The conspiratorial joy in it.
"Wheeler's too nice for her own good," he informs you. "She didn't want to mention me because she knew you'd bail."
"Why would I bail if you were coming?"
"Because of... you know." He reaches out and taps your hand—just a quick gesture, not lingering, but you feel the feather-light touch of his fingertip like an electric shock that ricochets up your arm. "The unresolved sexual tension and everything."
"What?"
"What what?" he echoes innocently, batting his eyelashes at you with exaggerated sweetness. Eddie loves this game, and he plays it well, even now. "Don't pretend you don't know what I'm talking about. You and me."
"You and me?"
"Me and you," he says, shoving his hands into his pockets and bouncing on the balls of his feet like an eager child on Christmas morning. The taunting tone is still there, but so is something else that makes your breath catch in your throat. "Done with that yet?"
"With what?"
"Whatever it is that's keeping us apart," he says airily, and then frowns as he eyes you again. "Which, come to think of it, I don't actually know. So, hey, let's talk about that."
"Eds," you begin, then catch yourself as his face lights up at the nickname, "Don't look at me like that. We agreed."
"We did?" He tilts his head and gives you a quizzical stare. "I don't remember that."
"Yes, you do."
"No, I don't."
You just give him a pointed look.
"Come on, Y/N." His tone softens, turns low and quiet and more serious than you're expecting. "I miss you. Do you miss me?"
He's staring at you so intently that you can't bring yourself to lie. You grab your drink and take a quick sip, to stall for time, because the real answer to his question is complicated.
The beer goes down too fast. "Eddie."
"What?" He sounds innocent, but he isn't fooling you for one second.
"Stop looking at me like that."
"Like what?"
"You know like what," you retort, trying to pretend that your pulse isn't pounding in your ears right now. "You're playing with me."
"Do you want to be played with?" he asks, dark eyes glinting again.
The playful remark makes your skin tingle with a heat that's all too familiar. It's not just the words, either. It's the way Eddie is watching you, the slight smirk curving his lips, the flirtatious shift in his posture as he leans into your personal space again, intentionally crowding you this time.
There's an answering heat in your face now, a flush spreading across your skin.
Fuck.
"You have no idea what I want," you retort, deciding that it's best to keep this exchange lighthearted.
"Bullshit," he replies. "I have a very good idea of what you want."
Eddie looks entirely too pleased with himself right now. You reach out and poke him in the chest. "And what is it that I want?"
He doesn't back away from the touch. Instead, he reaches out and pokes you back, touching your shoulder with gentle insistence as he inches even closer, until your face is just inches from his. "You want this," he says softly, gaze darting to your mouth and then back up again.
Oh.
"Don't," you say.
It's a halfhearted protest at best, though. And when Eddie raises an eyebrow, you shake your head with an exasperated sigh. You're well aware that you don't sound convincing at all. This conversation has spun wildly out of control in the space of seconds.
"Don't?" He parrots the word back to you in an incredulous tone, then pulls his lower lip between his teeth, watching you closely as he lets it slide back out from under his bite again, plump and pink and glistening in the low light. "I'm not doing anything."
Back up, you think. Move away. You shouldn't be standing so close.
You find yourself staring at Eddie's mouth for a beat too long before you look back up into his eyes. You smile. "You're going to get me all confused again."
"Good." He leans forward until your foreheads are nearly touching. "If I do it right, you'll start forgetting all those reasons you were using to convince yourself we should stay broken up."
You laugh as you shove him back a step, shaking your head. "See? There you go again."
He holds his hands up in front of himself, grinning widely as he speaks. "Look, all I'm saying is, sometimes you get all twisted up in your head about things. But, other times... well, you listen to your heart instead. You just need a little reminder that the heart is usually right."
"Oh, really?" You take another sip of beer. Tastes terrible. You wish it would at least do more to quell the butterflies suddenly fluttering in your stomach. "And who told you that?"
"Said so yourself, last summer." He stares at you with a wistful expression. "Remember? The lake. Sunset. I'd like to think you remember that day."
"Eds," you warn.
"And the night after that," he continues, his gaze turning molten now as he reaches out to smooth a stray lock of hair away from your face. "I remember every detail, I can refresh your memory if you want."
It's been too long since anyone has touched you like this, and your heart leaps as his fingertips brush your cheek. It's just an instant, gone in the blink of an eye. Still...
You really are touch-starved, though, if just the whisper of Eddie's hand against your face is enough to make you want to lean into his palm. "So, what are you suggesting?"
"Well..." His mouth twitches. "Are you going to kiss me, or should I kiss you?"
"Neither." You step back and take a sip of beer. Nope. Still terrible. "I, uh, gotta get some...air. Or something."
"Air, or something?"
"Yeah, I'm good," you mutter, setting the plastic cup down on the nearest available surface, which turns out to be a table stacked with pizza boxes. Your fingers find the wooden edge and you cling, leaning your weight into it. "Look, you need to stop doing that thing."
Eddie is watching you like a cat about to pounce on its prey. "What thing?"
"You know, the thing. The thing you do. It's very... persuasive. Very convincing." You fold your arms over your chest, because the safest course of action right now is clearly not letting him get close enough to touch you again. "And it's also not fair, because we agreed."
Eddie puts his hands on his hips and tips his head back, letting out an exasperated huff. "No, you agreed. I didn't agree to anything."
"Oh, c'mon. You did. And you know you did. We both did. It was mutual."
"Uh-huh." He makes a sound of amusement as he steps closer again. "Are you trying to convince me, or yourself?"
"I just—"
He reaches up, grips your chin with gentle insistence, and tilts your face up until your eyes meet. The world narrows until there's nothing but Eddie, who's looking at you with the same sweetly teasing expression he used to wear when he would lean over and whisper stupid jokes in your ear during class, back when you were still tentatively learning how to navigate each other, still in the shy, testing stages of that first year.
Except now, he doesn't look away as soon as you glance at him.
Now, he holds your gaze.
Now, his thumb traces your jawline.
Now, he gives you a moment to consider, before he leans in closer and presses his lips against yours.
It's not a kiss, really. Not quite. Just the suggestion of a kiss, a faint brush of his mouth against yours, a fleeting warmth that lingers for the space of a breath or two, there and then gone again.
You blink up at him, startled by the rush of heat that sweeps through you as his fingers linger on your skin. "Eddie—"
The next kiss is softer, slower, firmer. The gentle, searching pressure of Eddie's mouth on yours, unhurried and deliberate and sure, tugs at a piece of your heart that you thought was already mended, but he coaxes it into breaking open all over again.
"We...we..." You gasp, trying to remember why this is a bad idea. But the rational part of your brain is gone, shut off entirely by the little hum of contentment Eddie makes as he shifts his lips against yours. 
"We what?" His words are murmured against your lips.
Your mouth still feels like it's tingling from his kiss. You lean forward, swaying into him without realizing it. "We shouldn't—"
Another kiss. You let your eyes flutter closed, and Eddie nudges you backward until your shoulders hit the wall. 
His hands slide into your hair, fingers brushing through the strands, tilting your head back. You know you should stop him, but instead, you pull him closer, chasing the kiss when he breaks away, and, oh... his mouth is back on yours again, still slow, still soft, still measured. Not enough.
He is chuckling when he pulls back, the sound so quiet that you feel it more than hear it.
You think, This isn't fair. You shouldn't be able to do this to me. Not anymore.
The whole point of breaking up was so you could get over each other. This, right here? It is not helpful.
"Why, uh..." He clears his throat and trails off. When you open your eyes, you see him smiling down at you, flushed and disheveled, with a smudge of your lipstick on his mouth. "You've gotten really good at that."
Your hand goes up to his lips, finger swiping over the mark left behind by your lipstick. "So...you're saying I wasn't any good at this before, huh?"
Eddie bites his lower lip, his gaze darting to your mouth before sliding back up to meet your eyes again. "I'm saying we could've been doing this the whole time."
"We should stop, before...before...you know."
His nose nudges yours, a touch so fleeting it makes you want to tilt your face up to chase after it, but you stop yourself, because if you keep kissing him, you won't be able to bring yourself to stop. And that would be...bad. Definitely bad. You just can't remember exactly why right now.
"Before what?" Eddie asks in a low voice.
Your mouth, lips still warm from his, curves into a reluctant smile. "Eddie."
He's a breath away. "What, sweetheart?"
Oh, oh. You're in trouble. 
"You gotta stop kissing me," you say, as your fingers trail down his chest. He's so solid, warm under your touch. Your hands settle on his waist, and you grip the worn denim of his jeans to tug him closer even as you keep talking, trying to remember why you even wanted this breakup in the first place. "I'm, uh, working on getting over you."
"How's that going, by the way?"
"Terrible."
Eddie just laughs. "It is, huh?"
"Yeah, it is," you say. "But, see, I have a plan, and your kissing is messing up my plan. And my plan is a good one. So, don't mess it up. Please."
Eddie watches you, that fond, slightly smug smile on his lips again. He takes one of your hands in his and presses a kiss to the inside of your wrist, mouth lingering, his breath warm, eyes still on yours. "Tell me about this plan, then."
You make an indignant sound and try to tug your hand away. "It involves trying to spend less time with you, Eds. Like, you know, avoiding parties at friend's houses and all that. Gotta avoid those kinds of situations."
He presses his forehead against yours, and you sigh, leaning into the touch. "Why, exactly?"
"Because it's too... it's just too hard. It's really hard."
"I'll give you something hard, if you want," he says, a wicked gleam in his eyes.
You can't help but laugh. "You are the worst."
But maybe that's exactly what you need.
Well...that plan was doomed from the start anyway.
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